《Circus of Ales》


 Chapter 1 - An elf, a golem, and a lich walk into a bar

    It''s Tuesday night. I''m never here on a Tuesday night. Tuesday night is when Mayorga ropes one of the other idiots to work and I get tonight and tomorrow night off. I''m used to this set up and that''s why she sent that stupid gremlin runner to wake me up an hour ago. I glance around the bar, my head splitting from the bottle of Drider Venom Wine. I''ve faced a Drider or two and the hurt it put me through makes me think they got their marketing a little too on the nose.


    Knowing I don''t work Tuesdays, none of my regulars are here. It''s busy, but its nothing compared to a horde of hobgoblins. The only difference is I''m notreally suppose to hit these knuckleheads.


    "Hey! I''m dying of thirst over here!" The young elf is waving his hands at me, trying to impress his friends. I pretend not to hear them giggling amongst themselves, even though my Perception is at a high level 25. I mainly did that so I can dungeon crawl drunk.


    I make my way over to this young punk and stare with a grin right in his face, "Welcome to Circus of Ales. What are you having?" It''s not the standard greeting, but I''m not the standard bartender. I don''t even wear the stupid uniform that everyone else wears. White shirt and brown cloth vest? I don''t think so.


    Choosing, instead, a set of enchanted clothes I slapped together from the overgrown pile of stuff I call my Adventure Chest: black +3 Hooded Tunic, black Displacer Beast Leather Pants, and Boots of Ass Kicking should the moment call for them. The boots aren''t really called that, but its what they''ve done for years. I like the stats they give and the bonus abilities mesh well with working in a bar.


    "Oh," he''s glancing over at his friends with a look of concern on his face, "I don''t think we''re ready yet."


    He just drained all of my Patience Points with that one. Not that I have a lot to begin with. I''m about to give this chump a piece of my mind when my goblinette barback, Indigo, butts in, "I''ll take this one, boss." I''ve told her to stop calling me that, but she refuses to yield. She''s a three foot goblinette the same color as her name implies. It''s uncommon for them to be non-green so I think that''s why she ended up in this city and not in some mud hut in the middle of nowhere. I tussle her black hair and nod my head.


    "You know me, boss. Happy to help. Besides, Zuuna needs you." She makes kissy faces at me as she jumps on the special shelf I installed for her. From behind me I hear her high pitched craggly voice, "Alright, Ear Fangs. You know which end to put the drink you want or you need help figuring it out?" I nearly trip when I hear that, but I keep going to the service bar, the area where a bartender makes drinks for the bar maids.


    Standing there with a hand on her hip, a cocked eyebrow, and a toothy smile is the charming Infernus, Zuuna Foxbrook. She has light blue skin, short black hair, and short gray horns that pop up a few inches from her temple. When I say she''s charming, I literally mean she casts subtle charm spells on people. I''m not sure how she gets away with it, but she''s doing it to me-- "Stop that!"


    Her heart tipped tail covers her mouth though she smiles with her eyes, "Caught me, Puck. How can you even tell?" She pulls up a small red screen with all of her drinks on it. I thank the Goddess of Handwriting that this one is considerate enough to make her letters nice and big. The pulsing headache that won''t go away still makes it a challenge to pour.


    "Three pints Frost Dragon Ale, two Dryad Sweats, and a fucked up dwarf," she clarifies in case I fail the vision test.


    "Wait, what was the last thing?"


    "No. I have a fucked up dwarf in my section and I''m gonna get Gunther to help me. Wanna play back up?" She winks at me and I sigh as I finishing pouring the third beer. I reach for two bottles in the convenient rack at my waist and-- shit! I hate the way Alister sets up his bar! I swear, he sets everything up backwards just so he has something to complain about when he comes in! I toss the bottles back in the rail, making an unnecessary amount of noise and causing the Infernus to jump a little.This content has been misappropriated from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.


    "Sorry, kiddo."


    The demoness just shakes her head and looks over at a pillar where a half-orc wearing a white ruffled shirt, black waistcoat, and black trousers is standing sentry. To this day I laugh through my nose at their uniform. I think he''s supposed to be dressed up for the sake of professionalism, but he looks like he robbed a pirate of his clothes. All he''s missing is the funny hat and a small bird.


    "Well," I huff as I place her order in front of her, "I''ll cast an eye in your direction in case Gunther needs me. I doubt it, but you never know with adventurers."


    "Thanks," she says, catching the head of secruity''s attention. She waves her hand towards the cups, nearly knocking them over. "Shit," she says under her breath as she tries again and the drinks disappear into a red ring on her middle finger, "How do I always get the messed up one?"


    I pour a shot of brown liquor into a shot glass and squeeze the juice out of half of a red fruit called a gorgonberry. Not sure why it''s called a berry though, it''s the size of my fist. The moment the juice mixes with the liquor in the glass, it begins to glow a dim red. I slide it over to her and she downs it in a single gulp. Her grey eyes twitch and she grimaces, almost gagging.


    "Blech! What the hells was that?"


    "That was on me. Now, show that rock banger who''s boss. Gunther. Gunther is boss. And he won''t need me."


    She flicks her tail at me, though I know that''s as far as we go. We''ve been back and forth like this for far too long without it ever escalating and I''m not sure either of us is interested.


    "I''ll be right back, boss." I turn and spy Indigo hopping on top of the bar. My heart races, but she assures me that she''s only getting another few bottles of Moonspirit; a clear, orderless, flavorless liquor that we pretty much use for everything.


    I''m in the middle of serving a very attractive Succubis, I''m a sucker for redheads, when I hear a commotion from Zuuna''s section. It''s the dwarf and I try to ignore him.Crash!Damn, rock banger. I turn my attention to the red skinned woman with the red and orange flame hair, "Pardon me, miss."


    She shoots me back a flirty look, "It''s Missus. But he''s not here so..." She flashes a blinding diamond on her dainty fingers as they trace around the rim of her wine glass.


    A long string of Dwarven curse words mumbles out of the dwarf''s beard and his companions are quick to join him in his tirade. I bite my lip and make up my mind, "If you''ll excuse me."


    I slide on my angry face and stomp away from what was going to be the cure for my pin-cushioned brain. That''s the last time I drink anything beginning with the word "Drider". A melodic voice calls out to me, "Save some of that spirit for me, big boy!" Oh, this dwarf is going to get it.


    Gunther is unimpressed by the adventurers. There are five of them, including the dwarf, and most of them are squared up with fists. A Fissit, rat person, actually has a short sword on him. That should''ve been checked in at the door and I wonder where the hells did he keep it. Ew. I don''t personally have anything against them, having had a fling with a Fissita many years ago. Flexible. Prehensile tail. Nibble nibble. Of course, I was high off my ass on Lung Weed most of the time. Still, I think about Tiffany once in a while. Oh yeah, Gunther.


    I hold up a thumbs up in his peripheral vision. His arms are crossed, but the fist pointing towards me shoots a sharp thumbs up back at me and I lean on the bar to enjoy the show.


    I cringe at the amount of damage being inflicted. A bewildered halfling couple runs out of the way of the flying Fissit with the now broken hand. I reluctantly use a bar rag to catch the shortsword Gunther throws my way. I take a sniff, shrug my shoulders, and decide to keep the thing. I think it''s actually enchanted to disappear and reappear from a seperate dimension, but i''ll have my guy check it out later.


    Gunther is holding the dwarf by his ankles and slamming him into the others. I mentally give his move a six. I''ve seen it done, but wth a full elf and let me tell you that elf did some damage.


    The idiots were tossed out of the building unceremoniously, but a large scale healing spell was cast on them from the half-orc''s hand. Gunther is standing just inside the doorway, "Next time, I wont be so nice."


    Zuuna is near me at the bar, also watching the door. Without looking away I ask, "Did they tip?" She shakes her head. "Tch. Tourists."

 Chapter 2 - In need of a little morning after

    What in the Nine Hells did we do last night? I crack an unwilling eye open and spy my clothes scattered around a disheveled room. There''s a single pair of black lacey panties hanging off of a chair that I don''t ever remember wearing at any point in my life. I mean, if it gave good stat boosts or it was part of a Legendary set I would probably consider it.


    Wait.


    The Succubis last night didn''t wear underwear¡­


    I''m still squinting as I force myself up. Or, at least I would if I could. The manacles are just tight enough that I can''t wiggle my hand through even with all the sweat. I don''t need to cast Arcane Sight to know that these aren''t plain manacles binding my wrists and ankles to this bed. This bed?


    This bed is my bed.


    This is my room. That means these are my Enchanted Manacles. That means someone went through my Chest! But only I can open and go through my Chest! I force my brain to remember anything about last night.


    I remember working a night I wouldn''t normally work. I remember a dwarf tossing? The married Succubus. Come on, Brain. I know I don''t often treat you right, but- Hey! I don''t have that stupid headache anymore! The only other thing I can recall is leaving the bar at six in the morning with Zuuna, several hours after the end of my shift.


    I''m frantically searching the room for any other clues besides the panties and trying to remember the stupid encantation for the manacles. Why did I make it so difficult? I''ve only got three chances or they''re gonna freeze for eight hours before I can try again.


    "Swordfish."


    Nothing. Damn, the one item I don''t use that phrase for. I better save the other two just in case. I look down to assess my personal situation. Yup. Naked. All the old scars are still there, but nothing new that i can see. The Arcane Blast scar across my left set of ribs that looks like splattered paint is my favorite. Islands of light blue and bright purple on my tan skin. They''re so vibrant against my white sheets.


    And bloody? There''s dried blood all over the sheets and not a scratch on me. Where have I seen that before? Did Zuuna do some crazy ritual on me and it didn''t work? No. There''s no candles. Does she need candles? Crap, this just made it more confusing.


    I don''t bother trying to break the bed posts, since I bought the bed with a similar situation in mind. Do I have either of my Storage Rings? Yes! Okay, which one is it? I access the menu with my thoughts. Crap. Its the one I call Pantry, since its half filled with food and drinks. My stomach growls while reading the contents. I summon some Boar Jerky and try to toss it into my mouth.


    A blur of fur and teeth leaps over me and the bed, snatching the meat out of the air, "What the hells?!"


    A petite canine type female lands on the other side of the bed, growling as she tears into the dried chunk of flesh. Her fur is a honey blonde with streaks of silver, but it''s only in large patches with pale skin in between. The trouble with identifying these types is you don''t want to get it wrong. Sometimes they''re werewolves that got a racial trait to be partial. Sometimes they''re regular Dog or Wolf Half-Faunus, bestial people who aren''t under some kind of curse. Boy, do they froth at the mouth when you call them the "W" word. Rarely, they''re experiments or accidents from an Alchemy Lab. "Hey, pup," I call out to get her attention. Depending on her reaction I can usually tell which of the three she is.


    She stops chewing, cocking her head at me. Werewolf. "I got more food for you, but you gotta do me a favor." My eyes shoot down at my naked body. She looks back at me with large saucer eyes, and I whince. "No, I need you to cover me up first. I don''t know who you are or where you came from, but I don''t want there to be any confusion in case someone''s looking for you."


    It took her a minute to grab a towel from my bathroom and cover my goods with it. I toss her another piece of jerky and she jumps up on the bed, directly on my towel. "No no no no no!" That''s when the door opens to my bedroom and a certain blue Infernus walks right in.If you stumble upon this tale on Amazon, it''s taken without the author''s consent. Report it.


    I don''t even try to explain my situation to her, just peek behind the werewolf''s lithe frame. To my suprise, Zuuna is supressing a laugh and carrying a canvas bag with a yellow mortar and pestle on it.


    "I''m guessing you already know what''s going on?"


    She stifles a few giggles and manages a few words, "Oh man, you really gotta stop free basing fairy dust. You do some really weird shit!"


    "Very funny. Care to explain the really weird shit to me then?"


    "Be a good boy, and just wait right here first," she commands as she tries to lead the werewolf out of the room. She licks my face and I''m left alone, still shackled to my bed posts. I felt somthing stir when she did that and I forced the memory of the time some mage hit me with a Frost Breath right in the junk, "Don''t you dare, little Puck."


    "Funny, doesn''t look little to me," Zuuna almost whispers in a coquettish way while leaning against the doorway. Oh, no! Frost Breath, Corpse Eater, Zombie Dragon, the time the Halfling circus came to town...


    She spies the panties on the chair and looks back at me, "I was wondering where you threw those." Her hips sway side to side in the most deliciously seductive way as she steps carefully towards me. Her fingers are tracing the manacles, "What do you say we finish what we started this morning?" She reaches into the canvas bag she was holding earlier. I swear, if she pulls out a little blue triangle bottle I won''t be held responsible for both of us calling out this week.


    Instead, she withdraws a small vial of shimmering silver liquid and tells me to open my mouth. She sits on my stomach, inches away from Puck Jr and rests her pointy hand on my chest, the other holding the glowing tincture. With an eyebrow raised, I comply.


    The moment the liquid hits the back of my throat my entire body siezes with pain and the manacles audibly groan while restraining me. This is worse than a Shocking Touch! This is the degenerate child of a Shocking Touch and a Fireball! I start growling and snarling and roaring in pain as each second goes by. There''s the sound of a volcano erupting in my ears, but through it I can hear Zuuna hooting and hollering. She sounds like she''s trying to break in a horse.


    My eyes shoot open, but one of her hands covers them back up, "Not yet! Not yet!" The pain is starting to recede, being replaced by minor annoyance. She sounds like she''s having a great time, but I know the towel is right where it was in the beginning.


    Zuuna finally uncovers my as eyes as she slips off of me. The Infernus looks at me with a mischievous smile, "So, you want the short story or the-" she glances at the towel, "-long story?"


    "I wanna get out of these chains!" I''m still breathing hard after the ordeal.


    She ignores my demand for assistance and goes on to explain how drunk we got at the bar until about six in the morning. I nod my head and roll my eyes for her to keep going. Then, we found the lost werewolf girl roaming the street. Zuuna had conviced me to bring her back to my apartment since I didn''t live too far and we could ask around to see if anyone was looking for her.


    Well, it turns out she actually has a rare Feat called Curse Now, Wait Later that would give the effects of her cursed form, werewolf, instantaneously for an hour and then reset like normal. We found out the hard way when she bit my hand after we got home and I was trying to make a sandwich.


    Then it became a race to restrain myself and for Zuuna to get a vial of Plan Silver B, a cure for the effects of a bite from a werewolf, vampire, or zombie as long as you drink it within 24 hours of the incident. That explains the blood on the sheets, the Change isn''t an elegant or clean process and it''s one of the things that turns the Faunus off about being called Were.


    She tosses some clothes from my "wearable" pile on me, "By the way? Sunstone." The manacles release and I get dressed.


    "Thanks."


    "Hey, don''t thank me yet. You owe me two gold."


    "What? What for?"


    She holds up the empty vial, "This stuff isn''t cheap, you know?"


    I reach into my pocket and put on the ring I left in there. Why I kept the Pantry ring, I''ll never know. I drop three gold coins into her hand and she grins. I look past her into the rest of my apartment, "Where''s the girl? She still here?"


    She snorts a quick laugh, "Her name''s Aviva and she''s actually, like, a hundred and seventy years old, Puck. Didn''t know you were into that kinda thing. She''s got great-grand kids older than you. Besides, she lives a few doors down. Her Half-Were daughter was looking for her so at least you know that Aviva has a thing for Humans." She teasingly jabs me in the ribs.


    "Well, if I ever hate my bedsheets I''ll know who to invite over. Wait, why were your panties on the chair?"


    She''s laughing hard, "I put them there just to mess with you! Come on, Puck. Some of us aren''t into fur." She winks at me, slips on her underwear, and suggests lunch, "Let''s go to Grendel''s. They have all day breakfast."


    "Good enough for me, but let''s go to the one on Red Griffin Street. They got better servers and it''s not that much farther."


    "You paying for the carriage ride? I''m not walking that far, I haven''t even slept yet."


    I check my Pantry ring, "You want me to just make you something? You can crash here after? You''ve been up for a while."


    Her tail tickles my chin, "What a gentleman. You mind if just use your couch though?" She glances over at the bloody sheets and manacles on the bed.


    "I wouldn''t blame you. Cockatrice egg omelet?"


    "Mmmmm¡­"

 Chapter 3 - And we have a request in the back

    "Seriously? Three silver for a beer? I can get a quarter barrel for that much at the store!" The lizard man is prodding mighty hard at my patience, so I calmly take the tankard away from him and pull a big drink from it. "Hey!"


    I slam the half empty tankard on the bar and stare the confused gecko right in his diamond shaped eyes, "I can afford to drink here. If you can''t, maybe you shouldn''t be here." I flick three coins over my shoulder and Indigo, my goblinette barback catches them and deposits them into the till. "So, will there be anything else?"


    He ponies up the money for his beer and I draw him a fresh one. I slide him a shot glass full of Under Jungle Rum, "Wise choice, my scaley friend. No hard feelings."


    He blinks dumbly at me and then smiles, "You''re alright, ol'' man." He slips an extra silver my way and heads off to explore the seven floors of the "tavern".


    I add the coin to our tip bucket and mumble to myself, "I''m not old. I''m thirty seven¡­"


    Indigo passes by me with a bucket of ice, "Keep telling yourself that, grandpa boss."


    It may be true that the hangovers seem to last a bit longer than they used to. Sometimes I can feel my joints straining to move me, especially in the morning, but I''ve always chalked that up to my adventuring days. The other day I must''ve sneezed wrong and my back almost gave out on me. I grimace as I rub my tender lower back.


    Indigo cocks an eyebrow at me, fishes a card out of one of her pouches, and hands it to me, "Try this place. They''re known for combining Healing Hands and some unarmed discipline called Mountain Breaker."


    I furrow my brow, "That doesn''t sound appealing at all. Sounds like torture." I cram the card in my pocket, might change my mind if I can''t get my own happy ending tonight.


    I set a quart sized slurry of fruit juices and sweetend liqueurs in front of the seven fairy ladies and they greedily swarm the large wooden mug. The male fairy who told me he would be paying needed to be reminded of his agreement to give me money for the drink. "Yeah, yeah. Sure buddy." He withdraws a gold and silver coin from a pouch far too small to hold them and callously tosses them on the bar. "Keep the change," he says dismissively.


    I smile at him, though I''m boiling with rage on the inside. First of all, the change was only three coppers. Cheap bastard. Secondly¡­


    I pull out a dull gray coin of my own and flip it in the air. The ringing attracts the attention of all eight of them, and several other Fae within earshot of the bar, which includes many others on the other floors. The interior of our "little" establishment is actually seven stories high, though the outside looks like a modest little tavern, barely big enough to fit a family of four.


    Their eyes are on the coin, as it flips end over end and lands in my palm, "No, no. I insist." I flip the coin one more time, but instead of catching it I let it hit the bar and it bounces towards his two coins.


    The moment it touches the gold coin, the Glamour spell that enchanted them disappears, revealing two rocks shaped into flat disks. How green does this little shit think I am? Did he really think I was just going to take his word for it? I don''t trust a lot of people, but none less than Fae. It may sound racist, because it is, but I''ve done my share of endless dancing and forest wandering because of them. That''s why I always keep a Cold Iron coin in my pocket. It''s not meant to kill, but it''ll definately show them I mean business.


    I get real close to the highly frightened male fairy, who is now trembling in mid air. I take a long, drawn out sniff and exhale in his face. "I know you. And I know your name. And if you don''t pay me what you owe me, then I''m going to make you give me a very generous tip. Mister L--"


    "Okay! Okay!"


    He fumbles out two gold pieces and lets them clink against my own dull gray coin, proving their authenticity. I smile sweetly at him and pick up all three coins, leaving the rocks on the bar. "Thank you, sir. Now, would you like anything else?" He shakes his head nervously, looks over at the females, and flies off knowing he failed to impress. I put my coin back in my pocket, wipe my hands on a bar rag, and toss the change in the tip bucket.


    I''m having a converstation with the female fairies, who are now fawning over me. Never considered this kind of situation before. Seven of them might be enough to-


    A shrill voice calls out to me over by the service bar. Damn it, Marin.


    I reluctantly turn and spy the Half-Siren waiting for me with her palms up, fingers pointing to my well, the area where I make drinks, in frustration. Her skin shifts through shades of red depending on the amount of light that hits her. Her hair does the same and it seems to wave in a gentle breeze no matter where she is. Marin''s eyes are coal black and her lips are a full and pouty deep red. Her chest is always on the verge of spilling out of her uniform, though the rest of her is dangerously petite. She''s never this abrasive, so I wave away Indigo when she suggests taking her off my hands.If you encounter this tale on Amazon, note that it''s taken without the author''s consent. Report it.


    "What''s up, rosebud?" She only ever lets me call her that, threatening to drown Alister in the toilet the one time he did. She brings up her screen and practically shoves it in my face, folding her arms and looking away.


    "Two Mandrake Root Beers, one Frost Dragon Ale, three Dwarven Golds, two glasses of Drider Venom Wine (shudder), and I''m never dating anyone ever again because all men are jerks."


    I start working on her drinks, "That''s exactly why I stick to women, rosebud." She sniffles and casts her eyes down. "Maybe you should take a break?"


    "From dating?"


    I set all the beers down in front of her, grabbing two wine glasses, "From men, gremlin brain."


    I thought she''d be shocked, but her aura becomes more depressed, "Who ever heard of a Siren that attracts women to their doom¡­"


    I snort out a laugh that seems to get her attention, "You still living in your parents'' fishtank, kiddo?" I already know she moved here from the coast a year ago, but she shakes her head to answer my question. "Well, what city do you think you live in? The holy capitol?"


    She laughs, wiping her dampening eyes and scooping her drinks into her ring. "Yeah right, Puck."


    "I''m serious, Marin." She looks at me, a little suprised that I used her name. "I''m not telling you to switch sides, it''d be a huge loss, let me tell you. What I mean is, find someone who enjoys you for you and make sure you do the same, no matter the gender or race." She smiles at me, rocking on the spot and shifting between burgundy and pink. "You''re a sweet kid, and if I wasn''t such a jerk I''d take you out myself."


    Finally, her smile and laugh are genuine, "Thanks, Puck. I might take you up on that some day since I''m attracted to jerks..." She heads out on the floor and another bar maid takes her place.


    By now the live music starts and I roll my eyes right out the front door. Its another eight piece band. I''m chatting with an old Bugbear regular of mine, sitting him near the group of fairy girls who have a fresh drink in front of them thanks to him. He and I used to go to Halfling college towns and try to pick girls. Hey, I never said I was a White Knight. "Whatever happened to the days of one bard, one lute?"


    "It sounds like a tribe of goblins rutting in an instrument workshop," he commiserates and gets a round of giggles from the fairies.


    "You know, ladies, Jogrus believes that the Levitation spell is far superior to Fairy Dust." To a non-adventurer that seemed like a very stupid comment to make. Both may grant ther target a limited floating ability, but Fairy Dust also allows a little bit of freedom of movement. So, the dust would be preferable.


    But, for those who''ve been in the field and experimented with both, we were really talking about the use of them to create long lasting magical erections.


    If one were to use, say, a stamina increasing potion and the Levitation spell you could maintain for at least a couple of hours. Applying the Fairy Dust directly to one''s self would do the same thing for a much longer period of time, but it is far more expensive to get and to use for something so juvenille is a huge waste of money. Still¡­


    The fairies are blushing and giggling. They start a playful argument with Jogrus about the merits of the Dust while trying to be as discreet as possible. I go over to help another costumer, leaving the Bugbear to his fate. I lost interest in them after speaking with Marin, not to say that I''ll change my dirty old man ways for good, but tonight I''m taking a break.


    The "band" is actually not so bad. He''s a young Dark Elf Bard who enchanted seven other instruments while singing and playing the lute. During the cool down of whatever spell he''s using, he uses an instrument that looks like a larger version of a lute that I''ve never seen before. Six strings, body like a dwarf, and sounds like a Siren in heat.


    I get Indigo to watch my well while I go talk to the Bard on his break.


    "Get me an autograph!" She''s the only barback who gets to tell me what to do, but I still shoot her a look as she mixes a few drinks like a small tornado, not even looking back at me.


    I stand by his table where a tip bucket and a box of Music Crystals sit. He''s in a chair, wiping sweat from his brow. He''s wearing something similar to Gunther: white ruffled shirt, waistcoat, matching pants, but his outfit is a bright purple color. There''s a stack of parchments with his face and name on it and I grab one, "Ernil? That''s not Drowish. Self titled?"


    He smiles, shaking his head, "Nah, you can blame my mother."


    "Don''t we all," I hand him the parchment, "Can you make it out to Indigo?" I point a thumb over at her and look over my shoulder. She''s standing on the bar, waving her arms and I facepalm with an audible slap. He laughs, handing the parchment and a Music Crystal back to me. "How much for both?" I already know that the crystals are normally around three silver: one for the crystal itself, one for the enchanter to put the song into it, and one for the bard. Not a bad deal for a song you can play anywhere.


    "Just two silver, my man."


    I scrutinize him, but he''s being genuine and honest. I slide three gold into his hand with a shake. "Wait for me at the bar when your show is done. I got some items you might be interested in." He''s about to protest my generosity, but as I turn around someone is already shoving a parchment in his face to sign. A huge line had quickly formed behind me.


    I send Indigo to my apartment, a fifteen minute drunk walk or five minute jog away, to search my Chest for a few items and a spare Storage Ring to keep them in. "If you see anything you like, just please let me know you grabbed it, okay?" Her eyes widen like dinner plates and her gaping toothy smile stretches from pointy ear to pointy ear. I swear the top of her head looked like it was about to slide right off.


    At some point when I was still trying to decide my first job class, I thought about being a Bard when I got several items I thought would be cool to use from a few dungeons. There was a Ring of Minor Illusions that I thought could create a few cool effects. An Amulet of Echoing Voice, that doubled the Area of Effect size of a Bard''s voice. And an enchanted lute that could change into four other instruments that you attune it to. All those cool toys and I thought I was going to be a star.


    My heart sank when I realized they were just the ramblings of a drunk, stoned kid without any real talent. But this kid. This kid is the real deal. Maybe he can pull it off. I''ve seen high level Bards who could only control five instruments at once, and at a mediocre level at that. This kid had a total of eight; including a set of drums, a lute in his hands, and a decent voice. But his name¡­ I shake my head and grin. Ernil? Ernil is Elvish for


    "Prince, huh?" I pull a tap handle, pouring a beer and wondering how far this kid will go.