ã€ŠThat Time I went Traveling with a Girl from the Futureã€‹


 Warm Atoms - Part 1

    Total numbness would never be attainable, I realized. What lay before me was not as horrifying as the things that I had already seen, and yet the pain in my heart was still there. The sadness at witnessing it was still felt.

    To call the landscape desolate would have been an understatement. It did not look like the movies though. In movies, landscapes like this would be gray and dingy. Instead, everything was bright and bathed in a healthy warm light. It was the light of the morning sun to the east. The rays of that sun were cast across the sky as it rose over the Pacific ocean. It was a beautiful sight in contrast to the destruction opposite of it.

    I felt a tug at my sleeve, and looked down to the impatient girl who was the source of the gesture.

    ¡°Elijah, lets go.¡± she said, beginning to walk forward.

    A cold fear filled my heart. That was another thing which I was beginning to realize was not going to vanish with experience or time. Sadness was sadness. Horror was horror. Fear was fear.

    Besides, I was in legitimate danger, I had the right to be scared. Aileen had already stated in no uncertain terms that she would not, and possibly could not, use her time travel to put me back together if I died. It was one of her ¡°rules¡±. We could not use time travel for non-study related purposes like saving lives. The number of ¡®jumps¡¯ she could take us on through time was limited, and she was unwilling to waste them on things like resurrections.¡°Are you sure it is alright? Is it safe? It may be safe for you Aileen but¡­¡±

    ¡°I do not lie to you,¡± she replied. Her tone was not reassuring, but it was also not offended. In fact, she seemed indifferent. That was not unusual for Aileen. In her eyes though, blue and deep, I saw the assurance I needed. They were kind eyes.

    Aileen was often unreadable aside from her eyes. They were sometimes a dark blue and deep like the ocean, and in other lights and at other times they were bright like the sky. They always seemed wide open, like the eyes of a baby or a child. In general, Aileen was quite childlike. She was barely four foot nine, and she was tiny beside my very average five foot ten height. When I had first encountered her, I had assumed she was just some strange child. I had also hit her with a car at the time though, and thus had neglected to stop and care very much about her appearance or age. I was just panicked, and afraid my life was over. She had just been some girl that I had accidentally hit. The funny thing about that was how right and how wrong I had been.

    I took a step forward towards the ruined city in front of us. Mere days ago this city had been a thriving place. People had gone too and fro. Now it was a wasteland, and a chill ran down my spine as I thought about the possibility that I could be stepping on the dust of people¡¯s bodies while walking through the charred and burned rubble. My fears were more or less confirmed when I saw a the charred remains of a corpse - not much more than a skeleton - laying in the middle of the street. I was surprised I could even recognize the street as a street, much less the corpse as a corpse.

    Feelings of remorse and philosophical thoughts took a backseat to other worries for a moment, as memories of my last trip with Aileen took precedence in my mind. ¡°Aileen, you will be conspicuous. They will think you are strange.¡±

    ¡°Why?¡± she said, confused. The girl looked over herself in a worried way.

    Again, I was reminded of how childlike Aileen was. Even her mannerisms matched it in someways. It was like a child pretending to be an adult, rather than how an actual adult acted. Other aspects of her were not though. For example, when she spoke she spoke with clarity and a direct tone.

    ¡°You¡¯re hair.¡± I noted. It was blonde. This had been appropriate for our time in Germany and during out escapade through a 19nth century America. Here however, it would not fit. ¡°You will stand out.¡±

    ¡°Oh¡­¡± she said, running a hand through the long blonde locks. ¡°I see. What color should it be? Will I also have to change my face? That is not enjoyable. I would rather not.¡±

    ¡°Your hair should be dark, black or dark brown. No your face is fine, I don¡¯t want to get close to anybody anyway. I won¡¯t look normal here either.¡± I replied, ¡°Though I may pass a little more scrutiny than you.¡±

    ¡°You are human like them.¡± she said, and then went silent. It occurred to me that she expected me to finish whatever thought she had just spoken. This was a usual experience with Aileen, but one I had only begun to pick up on now that we were had been on a couple of adventures. She would say something, and then expect me to understand the rest of the thought from there, without context, explanation, or hints.

    ¡°Could you elaborate?¡±

    ¡°Everywhere we¡¯ve gone, you have looked unusual. You are human, are you not? Is everyone like those people we saw before, who saw different people as not human? Do the people we meet not think you are human?¡±

    The statement gave me an initial shock. My brain did not understand how to process it in the correct manner. After all, while I had thought about the notions of what makes a human a human quite a lot, in recent days especially, this particular trait of mine had never seemed to come into that question.

    ¡°Of - of course.¡± I replied hastily, stuttering over the words in confusion and shock. ¡°You are not less human because of what you look like, or who you are, or where you are. None of that changes anything.¡±

    ¡°Then why do they identify you as different?¡± she asked. From anyone else, it would have been rude, but from Aileen it was as innocent as a two year old asking the question. Still, I reminded myself that she was anything but an innocent child. It was possible she already knew the answer to her question, and just wanted to hear mine. Of course, there was the other question - how was I supposed to explain that part Asian and part white people like me just weren¡¯t very common only eighty years ago?

    ¡°Because people are not used to people like me yet. People in this time don¡¯t uh, mix, as much as they do in my time. I do not look like the people here enough to fit in, so they will be suspicious. There are fewer people that look like me in this time.¡± I explained. In my mind I wanted to expound on the explanation even more, but by the way Aileen stared and twitched mildly - an expression I had learned about on the adventure before this one - I knew that she was unsatisfied with the amount of time it took me to communicate my message. The reality was that she needed much fewer words than a human, and simultaneously she needed far less simplification.

    That was when I chided myself for the thought. Here I was, part insulted and part shocked by the question that she had asked me about fitting in with humanity, and I still had reservations about calling Aileen human. She had already expressed her desire to be seen as just that - a human like me, just a different species. It was hard for me though. She was just so different.

    Perhaps for a moment, I felt empathy towards the crew of the bomber which had caused the destruction we were strolling through. Excuses of patriotism, a belief that this was the right thing, and more had probably run through their minds a millions times since they had committed this act. At the end though, had it been any of those that had allowed them to unleash atomic fire? Or had it just been that they were scared, and that they had thought of these people as different from them?

    I reassured myself that Aileen didn¡¯t scare me though, even if I didn¡¯t quite believe it, and walked on.I tried to ignore it when her hair slowly started to darken to a raven black, and instead directed my eyes to the ruins around me, thinking of a different topic.

    ¡°This is strange.¡± I said.

    Aileen looked at me, not saying a word.

    ¡°We should be nowhere near ground zero, but the ground and the buildings are scorched. That¡­corpse, back there, was obviously a person that had burned to death. I knew the city was destroyed, but I had always though the outskirts of the city survived.¡±Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

    ¡°This particle data is correct.¡± Aileen replied.

    I knew that the data she was referring to was not the statement I had just made. Rather, this was a statement she made whenever I questioned the history that we would witness in our time traveling adventures.

    ¡°This is a secondary reaction.¡± she said, once more letting me fill in the thoughts she was omitting.

    ¡°I see. So I guess what you mean by that is this is the result of a fires that broke out after the bomb dropped. Not the initial blast.¡±

    Aileen nodded, and then wandered down a side street covered in charred rubble. ¡°Did your species discover nuclear fission through this event?¡±

    ¡°No,¡± I replied. I chose my next words with care. Aileen was not a judge of human kind, I reminded myself. She was not some terminator come back to end all of humanity. She was human. Her intent, at least her stated intent, was good. Aileen was a scholar. Also because of that, whether I liked it or not, I knew she would find the truth. Nothing I could do would change the outcome, except for perhaps telling the truth in a positive light.

    ¡°Why did this happen?¡± came the sudden question, interrupting my thoughts. I knew the question would come. Once she started asking questions, there would be follow-up questions, often sharp and quick questions that came before I was prepared to answer.

    ¡°There was a war. People were dying. Some people were afraid that more people would die if the war did not end soon. Some people wanted to test a new weapon. Others were just fighting. I am sure there were more reasons. All together, they wanted to end the war. This was how they did it.¡±

    Aileen did not appear to be listening to me as I began to ramble. She was walking at a brisk pace, kicking up ash and dust with her feet as she walked. I tried to avoid breathing any of it in. Aileen had said we were protected, but I was still careful. A certain dread filled me as I looked into the distance and saw people moving among the rubble almost a mile away. They would not be so lucky, and did not know the dangers they were putting themselves in by digging around in the radioactive dust.

    It occurred to me that I could see people across the rubble. The buildings that were still standing as burnt out husks were getting fewer and fewer. Everything now was flattened. Lucky for us, there were not many people nearby, and if we were getting closer to ground zero, then I knew that we would be seeing even less people soon. They would have noticed by now that the people who were around the middle of the blast zone were either all dead or dying.

    ¡°What is war? Could you explain it again?¡± Aileen asked.

    ¡°War is when people try to kill each other.¡± I said, noting that it was a new thing for her to ask twice about something. This was a question she had asked on our last adventure. Perhaps it interested her in particular. ¡°Does your kind not have war?¡±

    She stopped, kicking a little dust forward with the sudden halt of her feet, and turned around. There was a little smile on her face. ¡°Thank you.¡±

    ¡°For what?¡±

    ¡°For the question.¡± she said. ¡°I think you call the feeling ¡®rude¡¯. Yes, I was beginning to feel rude, asking many questions. This is a joint effort. We are studying each others species.¡±

    I smiled and let a small chuckle escape me. I had forgotten that already. When we had started our adventures together, not long ago, she had been insistent on studying Homo Sapiens and I had given the ridiculous but fair condition that I would help her so long as I was allowed to study her species in return. She had agreed with joy, and I had forgotten that she liked to teach as much as learn.

    ¡°Well then, answer it.¡±

    ¡°Oh , right.¡± she said, ¡°I¡¯m sorry. I forgot I had to speak.¡±

    ¡°Yes, we don¡¯t have telepathy like you.¡± I said, smirking.

    ¡°Telepathy is not the linking that my species uses.¡± Aileen replied. One would expect her tone to be dismissive, but it was just instructive. ¡°No, we do not have war. Why do you?¡±

    Once again I felt like I was stuck between a rock and a hard place. Do I choose to keep the reputation of humanity alive, or do I tell what I believed to be the earnest truth? Would that truth even be right? I was talking to a being that had downloaded and erased much of the internet in a day. That was of course, after a lengthy fixation on men from Florida, among other things. The decision to toss it had been decided upon because I had proven that a large percentage of the data on it was false. If I broke her trust, then there was no telling what would happen. Perhaps I¡¯d get stranded back in time if she just decided to jump ship and leave.

    Furthermore, it was strange and difficult to explain these things. They were concepts every human being that I had ever known or lived around understood - save for babies or the mentally impaired. Yet here I stood, giving my defense for human kind while also explaining such simple and intuitive things about us.

    ¡°I do not know the answer.¡± I replied. It was the best bet to start with. That way, at least, I could cover my ass if I was wrong. Then, I began the rest of my explanation. ¡°People are afraid of other people sometimes. They do not understand that we can all get along. Maybe we look different, or speak different languages. So they fight to settle differences like those. People hate each other because of their differences.¡±

    ¡°That does not match well with the data.¡± came the curt reply. ¡°It is not hate. It is not fear. However, those emotions are part of it.¡±

    This felt a bit rude. She had just asked me, had she not? Now she was telling me I was wrong about my own species? ¡°Well, how do you know that?¡± I asked.

    Aileen skipped along for a moment, before picking up a small chip of brick.

    ¡°Why destroy a building, if you hate other human beings or are scared of them?¡±

    It was, perhaps, the most instructive sentence she had ever spoken and yet it was also the most nonsensical. However, in the latter category the statement was facing an enormous amount of competition.

    ¡°I don¡¯t understand how-¡± I began, but was interrupted.

    ¡°-you and I are alike.¡± she blurted out, cutting me off.

    ¡°What do you mean?¡± I asked, bewildered.

    ¡°You are different from other humans, because you were born later. Just like I am different from you because I was born later.¡± she explained, smiling. ¡°You were scared of me because I was different, and you identified me as different because I was born later. You were also born later than these humans, and they see you as different because of that!¡±

    It took me a moment to realize that she was referencing a different conversation from a couple minutes prior. I supposed that she had just put the two trains of thought together. Who was I kidding. This thought had been in her head for a while. She had just thought that this was the appropriate place in a normal human conversation to voice it.

    ¡°Did you mention this now because you thought it was the right time to mention it? Also, please, explain your thought process to me fully, don¡¯t just blurt out a sentence and expect me to get it.¡±

    Aileen nodded vigorously. ¡°Yes, yes. I waited a short time to mention it, so it seemed like it came to me at the normal speed of a human realization, and I interrupted you to add effect. I also related it to a similar topic.¡±

    ¡°Wait, did you bring up this whole topic just to do that? The question about war again, did you ask that just for that purpose?¡±

    Again, she nodded. She then spoke very fast. ¡°Yes. But I also wanted to review known data and compare to current understanding. I also wanted to measure variance in your answer. There was significant variance, but that was expected.¡±

    It was difficult to keep up with her talking speed, but I managed. At least she was being detailed with the answer.

    ¡°Well then, that is..a good job emulating our behaviour¡­However, most of the time we do not manipulate conversations so much. Also, jumping around in them like that is a bit strange. You should just talk, and if something like that happens, you say it. Obviously, for you it would be slowed down compared to how you are thinking, but that would be a good place to-¡±

    A shout in Japanese suddenly rang out from behind me, and I turned to see two men standing with rifles leveled at us. I recognized the rifles as Arisaka¡¯s.This was not because I was a firearms enthusiast or anything. I wasn¡¯t even a history nerd. I was just some MIT biology dropout. However, I¡¯d watched a youtube video on it in a late night study session. I¡¯d failed the exam, and remembered nothing when the test came around, but I¡¯d remembered what an Arisaka rifle was. Thank you internet.

    The thought made me release an audible sigh. If only Aileen had just accepted the internet as fact and gone on I wouldn¡¯t have been in this mess. I put up my hands, and Aileen emulated the motion. We¡¯d been in this situation twice now, so it was good to see her understand what to do.

    ¡°Are we protected from bullets right now?¡± I whispered to her. She shook her head.

    I thought frantically. I didn¡¯t speak any Japanese at all, and the last time we had needed to speak a foreign language Aileen had built a translator over the course of a day or more to allow us the ability to converse. We didn¡¯t have anything like that now. Why were the men even aiming at us? What had tipped them off to us being different?

    Our clothes. I¡¯d thought that our facial appearance would blend in well at a distance, and it probably had, but both of us were wearing modern clothes. This fact had slipped my mind. We were wearing jeans and T-shirts at that. I dared not open my mouth. If I did I would get us in worse trouble.

    ¡°It is ok.¡± Aileen said. To my surprise her tone was reassuring. ¡°Both of them will die soon.¡±

    ¡°Oh goo- wait, no.¡± I whispered. ¡°Explain, how will they die?¡±

    ¡°One of them has radiation poisoning, and will likely die in the next day or two. He is already weak. The other has a 95% chance of developing cancer in the next forty revolutions of this planet around your star. If we wait long enough, they will be disabled.¡± she said, wearing a satisfied grin.

    This was it. Time travel or no, the me that existed was just going to end here. This was where I was going to die.

 Warm Atoms - Part 2

    They weren¡¯t men. They were boys. I was unable to tell if they were even teenagers yet. In a panic and at a distance I had not noticed, but as we were lead away by the rifle wielding Japanese soldiers I could tell that they were not adults. They smiled and joked with each other as we walked, and didn¡¯t bother much about pointing the rifle in our direction. If I had wanted, I realized that I could have escaped at any time. There would still be risk involved though, and if I didn¡¯t have to take a rifle bullet then I wouldn¡¯t. Besides, once Aileen had enough time she would be able to make something to protect us from the rifles. She had in the past.

    I watched her as we walked. Her head was cocked towards the boys, and she walked with soft footsteps. It was clear to me that she was listening. Before, when we had visited Germany, she had been silent for a long time while listening to everyone that walked around us speak. It had been eerie when after a few hours, she had begun speaking to nearby people with a perfect accent. They had thought she was native.

    I wondered if she already understood what the boys leading us through the wrecked city were saying. To my eyes it seemed like they were confused by our appearance, but still positive that we were enemy spies or something. I didn¡¯t understand a word of what they said, but they gave a mix of confused and suspicious looks that implied what I was suspected.

    After half an hour of walking we were well clear of the city, and walked up to the top of a small hill. The landscape here was covered in hills, with mountains looming over these hills and the ruins of Nagasaki.

    At the very top of the hill were a group of men. They wore ragged garments. Some looked like a type of prison clothing, but most just had old worn out military uniforms. I did not recognize the country of origin. A few of them wore hats that I felt I should have recognized, but couldn¡¯t. I was no world war two history expert, despite my viewing of the occasional late night video on the subject.

    As we approached them one of the men spoke, and their accent jogged my memory. I knew what country these men were from.

    ¡°Oi, mate! Who the bloody hell are you two now?!¡± he said, confusion in his tone and on his face.

    I looked back at the boys with their rifles. They seemed unconcerned by the fact that the man was talking to us.

    ¡°We¡¯re just¡­we¡¯re just civilians, passing through! We¡¯re not soldiers!¡± I replied.

    ¡°Yanks then?¡± The Australian replied, raising an eyebrow. ¡°You look fightin age but that girl sure ain¡¯t. What¡¯re you doing here?¡±

    I walked over to him and sat down, dropping my sore arms to my sides. I had kept them up in the air the whole time, and only now realized that wasn¡¯t necessary. Aileen followed suited in dropping her arms. I noticed she was looking over at me and the Australian, and while her expression was indifferent, I sensed annoyance. The fact that we were talking was disturbing her listening to the Japanese boys speaking. However, I wasn¡¯t about to explain to the Australian soldier that we needed to be silent so that my time traveling super human friend from the future could learn a new language. So I continued in conversation.

    ¡°We were just passing through. I have, uh, family here, so I was here visiting them. I don¡¯t know about the girl. She¡¯s just been following me.¡± I explained.

    Aileen piped up, being her usual honest to a fault self. ¡°I¡¯m studying people!¡±

    The Australian gave her an odd look, and then continued speaking to me. ¡°So you¡¯re one of them then..right? Err no, are you American after all?¡±

    ¡°Yes and no. It is complicated.¡± I replied, before sitting down beside the Australian. One of the boy¡¯s walked up to me and pointed at the ground. He stamped his foot and said something, before he and his friend began walking away. Aileen started to follow, but one of them pushed her towards me and pointed at the ground. He said something, and Aileen nodded. She looked dejected as she walked back to us.

    ¡°Ah. I suppose this was an unexpected development then. Unfortunate. Welcome to captivity.¡± he said with a smile, before shrugging.

    ¡°What was unexpected? The bomb or getting detained?¡± I asked. I looked back to the city, pondering what the event would have looked like from here.

    The man nodded towards the city. ¡°Both for you. We were already in this pickle before that happened though. When the whole bloody city went up it was a right surprise though. Wasn¡¯t expectin¡¯ that.¡±

    ¡°Well, you all are a surprise for me too. I would have never guessed I¡¯d find Australians in Nagasaki.¡± I replied.

    ¡°That is what this place is called? Huh, didn¡¯t know.¡± he said. Then he held out his hand. ¡°I¡¯m Captain Walker by the way. Pleasure to make your acquaintance.¡±

    I shook his hand, it was a very firm handshake. ¡°My name is Elijah. I actually have a question for you. Are we able to leave here? It doesn¡¯t look like we are guarded. Is there someone else watching us from a distance?¡±

    The captain shook his head. ¡°Nobody is watching us. Its just those two n**s.¡±

    I winced at the slur. Even in my time, language like ¡°jap¡± was considered very offensive. Here, it just rolled off the man¡¯s tongue with ease. ¡°Then why don¡¯t you escape? Couldn¡¯t you just run away?¡±

    ¡°Where to?¡± he replied, incredulous. ¡°I don¡¯t even know how to find this place on a map, and even if I did it wouldn¡¯t matter. I know one thing, we are in Japan. Japan, is an island, like Australia. There ain¡¯t no runnin outta this place. Their ain¡¯t no swimmin either. We¡¯re stuck.¡±

    That made sense, and I nodded. ¡°Do they treat you well?¡±

    He shook his head. ¡°The old guards didn¡¯t. After this bomb hit, bless you yanks for it, our captors were killed or messed up bad. We got out and escaped the fires, and then sat around till these kids showed up. I guess they¡¯ve decided they are in charge now. They¡¯re nice. For the past few days they¡¯ve at least tried to feed us.¡±

    ¡°I guess because they are kids they haven¡¯t learned how to be cruel yet.¡± I said, pondering about all the terrible war crimes the Japanese had committed in WWII, and wondering if these kids just hadn¡¯t been exposed to any hate for foreigners which had been imbued in much of the populace.

    Captain Walker shook his head. ¡°No. I¡¯ve seen too much of this war, too many kids killing. They¡¯re not innocent. Kids can be a lot worse than adults too. These two are just good, that¡¯s all. If I¡¯m being honest, most of these people aren¡¯t so bad themselves.¡±

    He looked towards the remains of Nagasaki, now gray and black rubble under a bright noon day sun. I expected sadness, anger, triumph, or something to be on his face. Instead, he looked indifferent. His stare looked like it carried for miles, well past the city itself, and into an unknown void. Behind him, I saw one of their comrades laying on the ground face down. His back and body were covered in bandages that one of his comrades was trying to change. As the man¡¯s bandages were taken off, deep burns were revealed. Sheets of skin peeled off with the bandages, with fluids and blood oozing out of the wounds.

    ¡°You know it reminds me,¡± he said, pulling my attention away from the gruesome sight, ¡°of a fire that happened near where I live. Six years ago now. There was this field near my home that burned up, and I walked past there after the fire. There were all these rabbits near the fence. They couldn¡¯t get over it or through it when the fire started. So they were just piled up. Thousands of them. We¡¯ve got a rabbit problem in Australia you know. On the other side of the country from me we built the longest fence in the world to contain them. But still, it was amazing to see how many they were. Burned.¡±

    I didn¡¯t know what to say, but I watched the smoldering remains of Nagasaki and tried to see what he was saying. Somehow, my next sentence came to mind. ¡°People aren¡¯t rabbits though.¡±The story has been taken without consent; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.

    ¡°No, no we aren¡¯t. But the rabbits didn¡¯t make the rabbit problem. They just existed, did their thing. They lived. They didn¡¯t deserve to get burned up, just like they don¡¯t deserve to be hunted. But they did get burned, and we have to hunt them. It is the nature of things. It is all inevitable.¡± he said. ¡°That is what I think about it, with this. You said this was a bomb right? That is the rumor going around her too. It was just one bomb. The biggest bomb ever made.¡±

    ¡°Yes, that is what it was.¡± I replied. ¡°An atomic bomb. It uses the energy stored inside of atoms. Atomic reactions occur, and it makes a big explosion. It is very hot. The people in the middle of the blast just get vaporized.¡±

    Captain Walker nodded. ¡°Sounds terrible. You think you Yanks¡¯ve got more of them?¡±

    ¡°No, these were the only two. America can make more though, and they will use them.¡±

    ¡°Well then maybe¡­maybe this¡¯ll be the end of all this mess. Maybe they¡¯ll bloody well figure out that they can¡¯t win.¡± he said. There was a confidence in his tone, but his hopeless demeanor did not match up to it.

    ¡°It will be a factor in it at least. Nobody is sure if it will be the only reason, but Japan is preparing to surrender as we speak.¡±

    His eyes went wide. Light returned to them. ¡°So the wars ending?¡±

    ¡°Yeah.¡±I replied, ¡°The war is ending. America is going to build a lot more of these bombs too.¡±

    The man became excited, and turned to speak to his men, before becoming unsettled. ¡°They¡¯re building a lot more you say?¡±

    ¡°Many more.¡± I said, thinking about the power of atomic weapons, and what Aileen¡¯s goal was. The girl was sitting on the ground a short distance away, playing with some insect there. Perhaps this was what she was looking for, though she seemed disinterested.

    ¡°Maybe¡­maybe there won¡¯t be anymore war.¡± he said, his face hardening as he came to a more positive conclusion than I expected of him. ¡°You know if everyone has got one of these, nobody would want to use them. Nobody would want this. They wouldn¡¯t, would they?¡±

    ¡°I¡¯ll find out.¡± I replied dryly. I stood up, and walked over to where Aileen was watching an ant. She was fascinated by it, and she played with it by putting a finger in front of it and letting it go around or climb over.

    ¡°So is this it?¡± I asked, ¡°Is this how humanity will end?¡±

    She shook her head, and spoke in a deadpan tone. ¡°No. These little things will not destroy humanity.¡±

    It took me a second to realize she was referring to the ants. ¡°No, I mean the bomb. The weapon that destroyed the city.

    Again, she shook her head. ¡°No. Those little things will not destroy humanity either.¡±

    ¡°Little?¡± I said, though I meant it less as a question, and more of a response. ¡°So, humanity becomes too large for nuclear weapons to destroy us?¡±

    ¡°No. Homo Sapiens do not go far from this solar system, before you go extinct.¡±

    ¡°Ok, so nuclear weapons had nothing to do with my species extinction?¡± I asked.

    ¡°Current data wouldn¡¯t indicate no. We would have been able to verify this as the cause in my time had it occurred.¡± She said. Then, she gave me a curious look, and glanced at the ruins. ¡°Why would these devices end the world. You said this was your kind¡¯s first use of atomic energy. This is a beginning.¡±

    ¡°What do you mean?¡± I asked. ¡°You wished to see the worst that humanity had to offer. I¡¯ve shown you death, oppression, and now this. The first thing we did with a new source of energy was to kill other people with it. That is terrible.¡±

    Aileen cocked her head to one side. ¡°This is not so bad. It is not the worst of your kind. I think it is beautiful.¡±

    I was stunned by the statement, and somewhat saddened. How could this being be human? They didn¡¯t seem to relate to a normal human being at all. Yes, her mannerisms were similar, but she didn¡¯t act like a normal person would. ¡°How could anyone see this as beautiful?¡±

    ¡°Nothing was lost.¡± she said, with assurance. ¡°This place will be rebuilt. More people will come.¡±

    Then she stood up and grabbed one of my hands. She looked at it, and placed her hand over it, hovering her hand several inches above mine. Her hand was a a bit smaller, and she smiled. You said that Manus Dei means ¡®Hand of God¡¯, yes?¡±

    I nodded, then watched as a swarm of black particles appeared in the space between my hand and hers. The swarm grew and moved and shifted. Amid its center, I saw something forming. Then, materializing out of the swarm was a tiny loaf of bread. It was identical to any loaf of bread that you¡¯d find at a grocery store, except small enough to fit in my palm. I had seen this before, and this was not the first thing that Aileen had created using her ¡°Manus Dei¡±, but it was amazing nevertheless. To my best guess her Manus Dei was a like a nanite swarm that accompanied her everywhere she went. That was what I had taken from her explanation of it anyway, the rest had been too complicated for me to understand. It was invisible most of the time, and could do many impressive things.

    ¡°You do not have such a hand. You just have these hands. They are clumsy, difficult, and unwieldy.¡± she said. ¡°And these hands made a light in the universe.¡±

    I raised one eyebrow. ¡°What do you mean?¡±

    ¡°Here, was the brightest place.¡± she said, her voice hushed, before looking towards Nagasaki. ¡°A bright place in a dark universe. So bright.¡±

    ¡°You mean the bomb was hot. So?¡±

    ¡°That is amazing.¡± she said. ¡°That is wonderful.¡±

    I paused and thought about it. She was not wrong about the heat and light. The temperatures inside the blast reached hundreds of millions of degrees, hotter than the core of stars. The light would have dimmed the sun from our place on earth. Yet it was tiny compared to the sun, tiny compared to the universe.

    ¡°I still do not see how you find joy in it.¡± I replied.

    She shrugged, an unusual usage of body language for her. ¡°It was a warm place in a cold universe. It was like you and I, particles moving so fast in a still place. Humanity will use this again, to bring them warmth and light, to make your lives better, and to go many places. It will be wonderful, and this is the beginning. The beginning of where my kind came from.¡±

    ¡°And we will use it too kill each other I suppose too.¡±

    ¡°No, you will not. That would be stupid, and your kind is not stupid.¡± she said, confident.

    ¡°I¡¯m glad you think so well of us.¡± I replied. I was a depressed person to say the least, but I felt a little bit of hope when she said that. Perhaps humanity was not so terrible after all, if this girl from the future could see good in us. If she could see hope for us.

    ¡°You are like me. How could I not?¡±

    ¡°I guess so.¡± I thought, but my heart was not following the positive train of thought. I had seen so much death and suffering in my travels with Aileen so far, that bringing a positive thought to mind was hard.

    I looked back to the Australian soldiers. Captain Walker was watching me with an expectant and confused expression. I had forgotten that I was getting his answer for him, and that I had left our conversation hanging. I looked out from the hill towards Nagasaki, and then down the hill where I saw our two little Japanese soldiers, playing some game with one another. They seemed oblivious, in a childlike way, to the horror they were a part of and that they had experienced. It made me think of Aileen, who I turned to next.

    From where we stood Captain Walker and his men would not see Aileen creating bread from nothing in her hands. I was blocking their view. Nevertheless, the effect was the same when she ran around me with the loaves in her hands, and began giving them to the Australian soldiers. They were all stunned, awed in fact, by what looked like a miracle. Questions followed, and Aileen answered them. Her scientific gibberish was understood by none of them, and it didn¡¯t help that she spoke in short terms that didn¡¯t make logical sense unless you were very good at putting together the puzzle of intuition and context.

    She ran back over to me and gave me a another loaf of the bread. I now held two in my hands.

    ¡°Eat.¡± she said. ¡°You need nutrients. You¡¯ll feel better.¡±

    I smiled, and looked at the soldiers eating away and marveling at the bread. They eyed Aileen and I with wonder, surprise, and suspicion. Well, I¡¯d better not look suspicious, I decided, and bit into it. It was fresh, and warm like it had just cooled off after coming from an oven, and tasty.

    ¡°I asked for the best of humanity.¡± She said, as she too ate some of the bread. This was a surprise. When I had first met her, she had claimed to not need food. I followed suit and took another bite. I chewed it, and ate some more, before finally answering her.

    ¡°Are you telling me, that you want to see that first? I thought you asked for our lowest point, the worst of the worst.¡± I asked.

    She paused a moment, as if to think, and then spoke with a slow and deliberate voice.

    ¡°I am telling you, that if this is too hard, or too much, that it would also be fine if you we found the part in your history which was beautiful - before all the terrible things. That extreme is also fine.¡±

    I smiled. ¡°Thank you. I¡¯m sorry you have not learned much from this so far.¡±

    ¡°It is alright.¡± she said, grinning. ¡°I learned much. For example, your species is happier consuming nutrients together. You have not been eating. You did not eat when I gave you sustenance. You ate when we ate together though.¡±

    ¡°What? Oh, I see.¡± it made sense, I thought, as I ate the food she had handed me. That was why she had handed food over to the Australians. I had thought she was perhaps showing a rare bit of mercy. In our previous trips she had been indifferent to suffering, and yet here she was feeding hungry people. However, the goal had not bee to ease their pain, but to get me to eat.

    Something about that was very kind, even if I wasn¡¯t sure if she was doing it to keep her human history tour guide alive or because she was trying to be genuinely kind. After all, she claimed to have empathy for all humans and living things, but never showed it much like a normal human would. She was still entirely unfazed by the suffering she had so far witnessed.

    ¡°How did you make the bread warm?¡± I asked.

    ¡°Little particles moving.¡± she said, which was the obvious answer, so I decided to question her further.

    ¡°No, but how do you get the-¡± and the thought came to me. It was a revelation that felt like a jolt of electricity. ¡°-Aileen. I know it! I know where we need to go. Actually, it should help you and I both. I have someone I¡¯d like you to meet, and a place I¡¯d like you to see.¡±

    Aileen looked up at me. There was nothing on her face to show visible curiosity, and she did not use any body language to show it, but I could see that in her eyes there was intrigue.

    ¡°We¡¯re are going to go to a very warm place in the universe.¡± I said, confident that I had found the sort of thing she was looking for. Her face lit up with excitement.

 Warm Atoms - Part 3

    If one tried to imagine the most cutting edge laboratory in the world, the usual image they would conjure up would be that of a secret government facility. It would be bleak, empty, and foreboding. Rogue experiments would occur here, and things that played God would be done with reckless abandon. Lots of money would be spent on the facility. It was just the latter part that was true of the facility that Aileen and I decided to visit.

    Describing the sensation of her time travel would be difficult, but to put it into simple terms it was abrupt and unimpressive. We would stand in a place, wait, and then the world would blink to a different place. It wasn¡¯t perceptible. You didn¡¯t feel anything. You were one place, and then another. What I did notice, was that smell and sight were always the first new sensations to hit.

    The first sight was that of a large concrete building, with a beautiful mural painted across it. When I looked around I saw trees, and a large brown colored sphere structure - some sort of architectural piece. There were green trees around, and on the horizon to the north I saw a portion of what I supposed was the Jura Mountain range. The smell of t his place was of the green trees, concrete, and the scent of gasoline - like there was a gas station nearby. Then came other scents, food, garbage, car exhaust, and others. These were the smells of a city, which I knew was Geneva. Sound came last. The first sound I heard as talking, from a nearby group of tourists. The second was of jet engines from a nearby airport.

    Aileen was the last thing that I noticed. I wondered if she just appeared later, or if the experience of having your environment shift in an instant just caused me to notice her last every time it happened. However, no matter how hard I tried, I could never tell for sure. It just felt like she was gone and then there again.

    Her hair had changed, back to its natural color of blue. Most people do not understand how beautiful and deep the color blue can be, but her hair was like that. It was an unnatural blue. I had told her before that it was ok to keep her hair in its natural color when we were in the modern age, but even I worried that someone would see her hair and have questions.

    Her eyes now had a similar color of blue as well, and they beamed upon the mural nearby. It was not just an artwork, it was a functional display. It showed what was within the building we were looking at, and the surrounding area. At least, it showed an interpretation of the machine inside. The parts and pieces were drawn in different colors, highlighting the individual components of the machine which was being used to research the very fundamental building blocks of the universe.

    She began running forward towards the building, but I stopped her by grabbing her arm. It would do no good to run towards places that may or may not have been off limits. The truth was, to a certain degree, most of CERN was open to the public. For this particular building, the very control room for the experiment was visible through a window that tourists could walk up to. I had always thought this was just a bit odd and wonderful at the same time. On one hand, looking at the scientists working made it seem like they were monkeys in their own experiment. On the other, it was nice to see science at work.

    I tried to imagine what it would have been like to watch the love of my life do that, to watch her chisel away at the secrets of the universe. I had never visited this place when we were together, and thus had never got the chance. A flutter of hope and happiness hit me as I realized that I now would get the chance. In the time Aileen had brought us to, Stella was working here. The two of us were still together, my mother was clear of cancer. All was right in the world now.

    ¡°Where?¡± Aileen asked beside me, breaking my mind from the reminiscence. The brief statement was a question, and like many of her questions left out context and important information, but I caught on.

    ¡°Into that building. Into the facility around use. ¡± I said, then I pulled out my phone, and texted Stella. This was six months before we broke up, but I knew she¡¯d still have the same phone and number.

    Hey, this is Elijah, I had to get a knew phone, are you at work now/in the ATLAS building or near it?

    A few moments passed, and then she replied.

    No. Is this really Elijah? Why are you asking?

    I took a picture in front of the mural. Without expecting it, Aileen photo bombed the selfie. She literally jumped into it, arms raised and a bright smile on her face. It surprised me, and a mischievous grin spread across her face after she had committed the act. I gave her an odd look, and glanced at the photo. I shrugged, then sent it without further thought. I looked at the noon day sun, and sent a text to accompany the image.

    Any chance you want to meet up for lunch?

    OMG YES PLEASE! So many questions!! I am on my way!¡±

    I smiled, who knows what work I¡¯d just disrupted, or how far away she even was. It didn¡¯t matter, she was headed to meet me one way or another. There was no stopping Stella when she was determined to get somewhere.

    After a few minutes of waiting, and watching Aileen draw things in the dirt or star at the mural, unmoving and unblinking, Stella arrived. I heard her and felt her before I saw her.

    ¡°Why didn¡¯t you tell me you were coming!!!¡± she shouted, and she tackled me in an embrace. Since I was rather tall, about 1.7 meters, her small frame did not totally knock me over - but she came close to doing so.

    I felt a smile spread across my face that brought deep pain with it. This wasn¡¯t real, I kept telling myself, we weren¡¯t back together. This was the past. Yet, I couldn¡¯t stop but enjoy it. For a moment, I was lost in that feeling. Joyous reunion with someone that I had loved and fallen away from. There was nothing like it. Her cute face, black hair in a lob cut, and bright brown eyes.

    ¡°I didn¡¯t know, I would be. It was just something that happened.¡± I replied, holding her out away from me for a moment, before kissing her without thinking. She reveled in it, and kissed me back. Since she was wearing a hardhat without a strap, it struck me on the forehead and fell off. I ignored it, but the noise of its falling attracted even more onlookers, and this broke Stella out of the moment and she released me and picked up the hat as fast as possible. She looked around at a few of the people nearby, now staring, and blushed. Then, she turned to me, and the did the final thing necessary to break me from the illusion that I was truly back with her. She looked at Aileen.

    ¡°Who - who is this?¡± she asked, puzzled. It wasn¡¯t accusatory. It was not jealous or suspicious. Aileen looked childlike, and though nobody could accurately pin down an equivalent human age for her appearance, she did not look like an adult human, much less the sort of human I¡¯d be dating or cheating on Stella with. Thus, her question was just out of confusion. After all, why was I with some random young girl at CERN?

    This question, at least, I was prepared for. Aileen began to speak, as I expected, and I waved a hand her way to hush her, then spoke. ¡°I¡¯ll explain over lunch. I need somewhere that we can talk.¡±

    Stella nodded, and with her usual direct but exuberant approach, motioned for me to follow her and walked away.

    Aileen and I followed. Along the way, Stella explained that that globe was the ¡®Globe of Science and Innovation¡¯, and many other things about where we were. It was as if she had turned into a tour guide. One might mistake her for one, if they didn¡¯t know better. Stella however, was no tour guide, and despite her outward bubbly personality, she was a genius. She was also a dedicated genius.

    A funny thing about genius, is that many do not have the drive to use their intelligence. Life is easy when a smart person is young and in most schools, so many have little reason to drive themselves forward early and to continue doing so later. Parents that want their children to have ¡°normal¡± lives aid this, by not pushing their child. My mother did that, and I couldn¡¯t blame her. I had enjoyed that childhood, and my mother had been a wonderful parent.A case of content theft: this narrative is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.

    Stella had a drive though. I was never able to tell if it had been her parents or if it came from her excitable soul, but it showed in everything she did. I had studied among geniuses, at one of the best technological institutions in the world, and she had stood out. Everyone had known it too. Not many begin their university studies when they are sixteen, fewer still have a doctorate at twenty-one. Stella did though, and it was just the beginning of what she would do, I knew it.

    The restaurant that we eventually arrived at was self-service, and had a large seating area. Nevertheless it was also quite crowded, which under normal circumstances would have annoyed me, but it was good for what we were going to do. It would keep our conversation from being too conspicuous.

    Soon enough we had food and had sat down. It was then that Stella launched a flurry of questions.

    ¡°How did you get here, why is a little girl tagging along with you, and how long can you stay? Also, you will get extradited if you kidnapped her, just so you know.¡± she said. A smirk came to her lips.

    ¡°I was not kidnapped.¡± Aileen piped up, and her face held on to the indifferent expression I¡¯d known her for. She still stood by our table, rather than sitting down. Stella brought her hands to her cheeks and her mouth hung agape.

    ¡°Oh my goodness, she¡¯s so adorable! That tone was so deadpan!¡± Stella said, before motioning to the seat beside her in our table. ¡°Come on, have a seat.¡±

    Stella then looked up at me, and her demeanor became serious. ¡°Are you alright? You don¡¯t look great, and you keep just¡­staring. Is everything ok? Honestly, who¡­who is this? Answer me.¡±

    I felt terrible. There was no way around it. I hated every part of this. It hurt less than seeing the trauma and horrors that I¡¯d experienced in my past few adventures with Aileen, but it hurt in a different way.

    ¡°This is Aileen.¡± I said, motioning to my time-traveling future friend. ¡°She brought me here, and I think she would enjoy talking with you. About physics and things.¡±

    ¡°What?¡± Stella said, arching and eyebrow, before looking at the girl. ¡°What do you-¡±

    Amid the bustle and many chattering conversations of R1, where the universe was being unraveled by old and young alike, Stella¡¯s phone pinged a notification. To my surprise, rather than ignoring it, she checked it.

    Then it occurred to me. This was the usual time I would have conversations with her during the day. I would get off work, and she would be at lunch on CERN time. This was a trained instinct for her, to check the phone no matter what if it went off during this time, to see if it was me.

    Concern flashed across her face and then turned to utter confusion and fear. She looked up at me, then back at her phone.

    ¡°I suppose that is me texting you, isn¡¯t it?¡± I said.

    ¡°Who the hell are - is this- what?!¡± she stopped and looked around, as if seeking an escape. Then, I turned to Aileen and spoke. It wasn¡¯t as if I knew what to do, but I knew that in this situation, it would be better to have a childish face explain things in a rational way than for me to try and reach out with an emotional plea. I couldn¡¯t explain this, or even understand it.

    ¡°Aileen, please explain to Stella how time travel works.¡±

    Stella froze. She blinked, as if unsure of what she had heard. Without skipping a beat though, Aileen responded.

    ¡°Time-place particle manipulation via extrapolation of collisions and energy resonance signature identification and stabilization is the method by which I travel through time.¡± Aileen began.

    ¡°That doesn¡¯t mean any-¡±

    ¡°Generally, you may consider the illusion of time and its meaning to humanity to be an irreversible process. However, particle collisions and interactions are not untraceable nor irreversible. While the net entropy of the universe must increase, the process I am describing can be almost fully reversed with near perfect fidelity. This first requires -¡±

    And I cannot tell you where I became lost, but I did. This had happened when Aileen had first tried to explain her time-travel to me. She refused to simplify it, and I had stopped asking. Stella however, became locked into the discussion. She asked probing and clarifying questions that Aileen answered without any difficulty. More than once she had worn a look of shock and disbelief, only to have that look wiped from her face by things Aileen said. More than once, she tried to correct something Aileen said, only to be corrected herself. Stella had no trouble accepting these corrections either.

    Time wore onwards, and the information exchange kept going. Stella grabbed a napkin at one point, and started using that to follow along. Then, she grabbed another. Some curious physicists spotted this, and a couple stepped closer to see what she was doing, but she shooed them away with a hand, and they obliged without further question. In time, almost all of the customers had left the restaurant, and Aileen stopped speaking and began writing on the napkins to help guide Stella. Talking between the ceased. Then the writing did too.

    Napkins were splayed across the table like a map. Equations and numbers were written across them that looked foreign to me. Stella stared at them, looking so defeated it made me a little sad. I had never seen her even strain to understand something. At this point, I wondered if she looked worse for wear than me. Her face was both depressed and awed, as well as tired and shocked.

    It was an hour later, after she had checked over the napkin calculations and notes multiple times that she spoke again. By now, individuals were beginning to filter in for the evening, to sip on beer and relax after a days work - and maybe to share ideas.

    ¡°The you that texted me. That is another you.¡± she said. Her voice was filled with disbelief, and her mouth hung open in between setnences. ¡°This is it. This is actual time travel.¡±

    I nodded. ¡°A different version, a different place, a different time.¡±

    ¡°No not a-¡± she began, and then turned to Aileen, mouth agape. ¡°Wait, he doesn¡¯t know?¡±

    Aileen shook her head. ¡°I explained, he did not understand. He is distressed. I am empathetic and sympathetic to him, I do not want him more distressed. Also, my study would be jeopardized.¡±

    ¡°Oh.¡± Stella replied, before she looked back at me, and then to Aileen. ¡°But why? Why is he distres-¡±

    ¡°My mother died, Stella. Her cancer comes back in August. Metastasizes, got everywhere it could. She dies in December. You and I break up in October.¡± I said, and involuntary tears sprung up in my eyes. I could feel the tears falling, and the lump in my throat became so strong that it was hard to speak. ¡°I¡¯m looking at a past that was good. She¡¯d just gotten better. You¡¯d just got this job. I - I¡¯d not see- seen things - and heard-¡±

    It was too much to bear. I started to bawl, earning some odd glances from the few extra patrons. One walked up, someone who Stella greeted in a cheerful manner. They offered if they could get me a drink or something, and Stella gently turned him away.

    After some moments, I started to compose myself. Stella had not moved from her seat, but had put her hand on one of mine to console me. She seemed unsure, and afraid.

    ¡°Look-¡± I began again. ¡°She wants me, she wants me to-¡±

    ¡°Study the extremes of humanity.¡± Aileen interrupted. ¡°The best and worst moments of human history should allow insight into what caused humanity to go extinct.¡±

    ¡°You aren¡¯t even human?¡± Stella asked in a quiet voice, which gained a glare from Aileen.

    ¡°I am human. I am a different species.¡± Aileen explained.

    ¡°Right, that makes sense. I guess.¡± Stella said, and looked thoughtful. Then, after a moment she spoke again. ¡°So why come to me?¡±

    There was a sad smile on her face now. It hurt to see the happy and extroverted scientist seem crestfallen. I wondered what she was thinking about that had caused it. Was it the secret to time travel that Aileen was withholding from me, or rather, that I could not understand? Had that caused her change in mood?

    ¡°Well, you see, we went to Nagasaki, right after the bomb was dropped. While we were there, Aileen mentioned how there were beautiful aspects to the bomb amid the sad parts. She talked about its heat for example, and the things humanity learned. So my line of thought was that you collide particles here. They get very hot, and you learn things. It seemed like the right place to go.¡±

    Stella nodded along, but looked concerned when I me ntioned Nagasaki. ¡°Well, tomorrow would be a good time. I''ll be on shift part of the day actually, so you can get to see me work. The you in this time hasn''t yet planned a trip.¡±

    Aileen stood up. ¡°Alright. Let''s go there Elijah.¡±

    ¡°No!¡± Stella blurted out. This attracted some odd looks from nearby physicists and others, once agian drawing their curioousity. She waited a moment, till the stares were gone, before speaking again in a quieter tone. Her eyes stared at Aileen in a determined but pleading way. ¡°Don¡¯t leave. Give me this.¡±

    Aileen cocked her head. ¡°What?¡±

    ¡°You can¡¯t¡­can you? It wouldn¡¯t be wise, would it? This costs, doesn¡¯t it? Even with all that you have, this has got to cost. The energy required for this project of yours is enormous. You¡¯d blink enormous quantities of stars out of existence every time, no number of Dyson swarms would be enough, would it? Or¡­or¡­is it a black hole you¡¯re using? Sure, the energy would no not be much on that scale, but enough to make it costly for-¡±

    ¡°Yes.¡± Aileen said, interrupting her. ¡°You are correct. The cost is great. I do not have jumps to spare. Waiting a day is acceptable, and I feel for you. Also, he is not distressed with you. This is good. Time spent here would be accepable.¡±

    Stella gave a grateful smile and then stood up. She grabbed my hands, and before I knew it I had been whisked away. Aileen, to my surprise, did not even try to follow. She sat at the table, and watched as I walked away with Stella.

    Soon, we had left the building. I was confused, but happy. I was so very happy. Before long, we had left all of CERN completely, and in about an hour or so we were wandering through the streets of Geneva.

 Warm Atoms - Part 4

    We walked without a thought to the distance or where we were going. I didn¡¯t even think to ask Stella about what her plans where, and she did not inquire about mine either. I do not think that either of us cared. The future did not come up in conversation, and she did not act like I was anyone else other than who I was. That is, I was Elijah, her boyfriend of four years. And yet that time felt like nothing now. It was as if we were two young lovers that had just met, or had just been together for a few weeks, or a few months, or a few years. It just didn¡¯t matter, we were together. She did not bring up the future, and neither did I.

    I was not a time traveler during these moments.

    The day had been warm and beautiful, without a cloud in the sky, and the evening was just as much so. With the fading of the hot summer sun, the asphalt of the city streets gave off warmth into the comforting cool of the night.

    The only European city that I had been to up till this point in my life was Krakow, and that had been in 1945 with Aileen in Poland. Up till this point I had always assumed that they would be very picturesque. Pictures online and things I¡¯d heard had always lead me to believe that they were quite nice.

    My expectations were neither crushed nor dispelled - because I was paying little attention to the city or the country I was in. The old and new architecture went past without notice. Whether a street was clean or dirty didn¡¯t matter. For all the chances at good cuisine we had, Stella and I ate at a McDonald¡¯s for our dinner, and crossed the Rhone afterwards. Then we passed through a park, and there were various monuments in that park which I recall; but they passed by while I was watching Stella talk about her work, her plans going forward, and about our favorite things.

    I felt real again. Traveling with Aileen had always felt impossible. Every moment it felt like I was going to wake up from a long sleep, and return to reality. I always wondered if I would regain my sanity, and just forget it all. Now, I had. I had woken up, and not to a psych ward, but to my perfect reality.

    Onwards we journeyed. There was still no plan. It was just the two of us and the night, in one moment that passed to another.

    We wandered and wandered, and at some point we were not able to walk anymore. We had walked out onto some jetty that extended out into Lake Geneva, or as others knew it the Le Leman. There were boats and the shore behind us, and in front of us was the lake and the city beyond. Towards our front, there was a fountain off to the left, and a peculiar little lighthouse off to the right. The fountain was illuminated by light, and the city behind it glowed with its own bright lights. The sight was gorgeous, and breathtaking. For once in the evening, my eyes left Stella to stare upon something else, and perhaps that was what destroyed our moment together in time. That was the point in the dream where I accidentally triggered an event which would wake me involuntarily.

    ¡°Isn¡¯t it beautiful.¡± Stella said, with a look in her eyes and a tone of voice that made me cautious. This wasn¡¯t just an observation or a question.

    I nodded, then waited for her to continue. She did.

    ¡°I like old things like this city you know. Do you think that makes me a hypocrite?¡±

    I shook my head. ¡°No, not at all. How would it?¡±

    ¡°Well, I like old things, but I¡¯m always looking for the new. Pushing ahead to the future, researching science and technology that we don¡¯t have yet. I¡¯m always searching for a way into the future.¡± she explained. Then her face fell. ¡°A future that doesn¡¯t matter now. Not for me.¡±

    ¡°Stella, what do you mean by that? What did you mean when you were talking to Aileen earlier? About her time travel, and not explaining it to me?¡± I asked, sighing as I did so. After saying the words, I wanted them back. I didn¡¯t want the nightmare to return. It wasn¡¯t a nightmare though. Aileen was real, and I had to deal with that.

    ¡°Yes and no.¡± she said, before motioning towards the city with one hand. ¡°What do you think of when you think about Geneva?¡±

    I paused, and looked out at the city again. It was still beautiful. ¡°The Geneva convention? Clocks? Switzerland?¡±

    She smirked, and then giggled. ¡°Great, and you¡¯re the religious one.¡±

    ¡°You mean the atheist raised Catholic.¡± I replied, feeling a bit strange correcting her, even if I meant it to be just counter-teasing.

    ¡°True, and that may explain why you don¡¯t know what I¡¯m getting at.¡± she replied. ¡°See, this city was the home of a man named John Calvin for many years. He was a protestant theologian, and truth be told I didn¡¯t know much about him before I took a class on Christian theology during my last couple semesters, when we first met and I thought you were a genuine Christian because you went to Mass regularly,-¡±Unauthorized use of content: if you find this story on Amazon, report the violation.

    ¡°-please, don¡¯t bring that up.¡± I said, interrupting her. It had always been a point of contention for her, that I¡¯d pretended to be religious to make my mother happy, rather than denying the faith she¡¯d taught me. Stella had always thought of it as lying, but for me I¡¯d always thought it the wiser and kinder choice for my mother¡¯s sake and mine. Even up to my mother¡¯s death, I¡¯d never had the spine to tell her that I¡¯d abandoned my faith.

    ¡°The point is this theologian, he had an idea. He thought that everything was predestined. Sinners went to hell because God planned them to, saints went to heaven because God planned them to. All planned from the start.¡± she explained.

    I let her go on, even though I did know what Calvinism was, vaguely. I just had never known that John Calvin had lived in Geneva. It was fine to just let her talk and explain it to me though, I liked listening to her explain things.

    ¡°So nothing fell out of God¡¯s plan or sovereignty. He controlled everything about the world. Everything is known by him, and set in motion. Humans didn¡¯t defy God, it was all in his power. Planned for, by him. Then, after this, came deism. In that belief, God became a great watchmaker. So, I guess God is Swiss.¡±

    I let out a chortle. ¡°Was that where all this was going; to say we¡¯re in the real Jerusalem?¡±

    Stella rolled her eyes. ¡°No, of course not. I wish that was all this was about. The point is that in that belief God was responsible for absolutely everything. Fully sovereign. Everything was his, absolutely everything.¡±

    ¡°Wouldn¡¯t that also make God , like, responsible for all sorts of stuff?¡±

    She shrugged. ¡°Maybe? Does it matter though? What difference would there in that belief, between God and the universe moving? Between our path being chosen, decided, and our perception that we¡¯re choosing our own way. It wouldn¡¯t matter would it?¡±

    ¡°But what does this have to do with -¡±

    ¡°It has to do with Aileen because¡­well, Elijah, mathematics doesn¡¯t lie. It doesn''t cheat. You can¡¯t spin it in some what like people do about vaccines or evolution. What she showed me, what she explained, it was real.¡± Stella said, her expression becoming stern, and then distressed. A disturbed smile appeared on her face. ¡°Her time travel isn¡¯t like movies. It is real, but not how you would expect. There are no alternate time lines, no new universes, no changes to the future. It is like unscrambling an egg. It is like turning the flow of a waterfall around, but that water does have to fall again¡­or¡­agh, its hard to explain it in a simple way that isn¡¯t, well, horrible.¡±

    It didn¡¯t make sense, how could any of that be horrible? ¡°I¡¯m sorry, I don¡¯t understand what you¡¯re getting at.¡±

    She shook her head. ¡°Never mind, that isn¡¯t the point. The point is - what if God were real, and we were all in his control? What if there was a being, that governed ever little action of our lives, every particle or wave, every bit of energy and matter? What if everything was planned, and begun by an action before it. Determinism, that sort of thing.¡±

    I stared, trying to decipher her meaning, and yet becoming more and more uncomfortable with the implications. ¡°It would be frightening, but-¡±

    ¡°-no, it would be wonderful. There would be nothing to worry about.¡± she exclaimed, ¡°Because we¡¯re just here for a moment. And if we can¡¯t decide what that moment will be, or how long it is, or what it means - then we just have to live it. What I¡¯m saying is, it doesn¡¯t matter if there is a plan or a purpose for us. If what I said was true or not, we can¡¯t change it. We just have to enjoy what a precious bit of existence it is.¡±

    My mind flashed back to Nagasaki, and to the rabbits the ANZAC had spoken of. The humans in that city, the rabbits the man had talked about. They had just been living the only way they could, and then dying the only way they could. The thoughts sent a chill down my spine, but then a rush of relief fell over me. ¡°We¡¯re like, animals caught in a fire.¡±

    ¡°No,¡± she said, smiling. ¡°One day the universe will die. We with it. It will die in a total cold, unmoving still. There, time will have no meaning. We are the fire now, the atoms that move and dance. Whether it is tomorrow or the next day, one day this will all vanish. We have to enjoy this now!¡±

    ¡°Is that a physicists way of saying I love you?¡± I asked, and turned away from the city to look at her. She looked back, and our eyes met for perhaps the thousandth time in the evening.

    No.¡± she replied. ¡°This is.¡±

    Then she kissed me, and then did so again. I pulled away from her and gasped a bit. My heart beat fast and hard in my chest.

    ¡°It is getting really late, how long would it take to get back to your place?¡± I asked. She smiled and shook her head.

    ¡°Lets get a hotel. How about one of the five star ones over there!¡± she said, pointing across the lake.

    My brow furrowed. ¡°Wouldn¡¯t that be expensive?¡±

    She shrugged. ¡°I''m just worried about right now Elijah. That is all I have. When you and Aileen leave, well¡­¡±

    ¡°-you¡¯ll still have the real me here.¡± I said, chuckling a little at the thought. Here I was, getting my girlfriend to cheat on myself with me. Did that even count as cheating? ¡°Who knows, maybe you¡¯ll avoid all the stuff that caused us to break up, now that you know what is possible. Hey, doesn¡¯t that kind of prove the whole determinism thing wrong,?¡±

    She smiled, and I expected the smile to be sad, but it was happy. Her eyes looked like they wanted to cry tears of joy. ¡°Yeah, sure. But right now, I have the you that is here, and I want to enjoy him.¡±

    I would say that I returned the smile, but I had been non-stop smiling since we¡¯d kissed, and then pulled out my phone. ¡°Well, we will, but lets find a place that¡¯s not many hundreds of dollars a night.¡±

    And I did. It was a simple place, not lavish or fancy, but cozy and clean. And the last couple hours till we slept were filled with nothing but love and happiness.

 Warm Atoms - Part 5

    When Stella woke the next day she felt refreshed, which did not fit with the fact that she had walked across Geneva the day before, and had just a few hours of sleep to rest up from it. It didn¡¯t make sense, but she knew why.

    As much as she considered the musings of writers, poets, and artists of all sorts about love and its magic to be foolish and nonsensical, there was something amazing about the healing and rejuvenating effects of love on the mind and body. It was, in all its forms, like a drug. Whether it was sexual or innocent romance, it left the heart beating better and the mind thinking faster.

    She got out of bed in the cozy hotel room and glanced at the clock. It was 8:30. She would be late for work. That was alright though, such trivialities had vanished from her mind. Elijah was still asleep, and she made her way to the bathroom to wash up and get ready for the day. When she opened the bathroom door, she jumped, but kept down a yell.

    Aileen stood inside the bathroom, curiously examining the sink. That single moment in time felt like something out of a horror movie. For all intents and purposes, the being that was in the bathroom was no a human girl, but an omniscient and omnipotent God - Yaweh, Allah, Zeus and the whole pantheon combined, or any other deity. No, Aileen was far worse than such beings, because she was demonstrably real, and she was standing in the hotel bathroom. That being then looked over at Stella, and the physicist felt her heart skip a beat.

    Calm. Total calm. It didn¡¯t matter. Whatever Aileen was, didn¡¯t matter. Stella realized that it was because Aileen was real, that there was nothing that needed to be worried about. Worry was pointless. This moment wasn¡¯t frightening. It was an opportunity, to know more about the world and to enjoy life.

    ¡°Hello Aileen.¡± Stella said, bringing as warm a smile to her face as she dared. She felt her usual cheery and carefree self returning at a slow pace from the devastating revelation she had experienced the day before.

    ¡°Hello Stella!¡± Aileen replied, and also smiled. It felt like a smile given in return, but not genuine. There was however, no malice behind it, not hidden intent. It was just meant to return a gesture of happiness.

    ¡°How did you find us?¡± Stella asked, sating her curiosity about the first question which came ot mind.

    ¡°Were you hiding?¡± Aileen asked, and cocked her head to one side in confusion. Then, her expression softened to worry. ¡°I know that it is easy to scare your kind, but I am not a threat, and I am not hunting you.¡±

    Stella thought about the idea for a second. For Aileen, finding someone had so little effort involved that it was not like stalking or tracking someone. It was just a matter of looking for them, like you would at a party or within your own house.

    ¡°No, I was not hiding. However, I can¡¯t find people like you can.¡± Stella explained. ¡°And you are right, we do scare easily, but we are also very curious. So I want to know how you found Elijah and I.¡±

    ¡°You are like us!¡± Aileen said, smiling this time with sincere happiness. ¡°You are like my sort of human. We are very curious.¡±

    ¡°I guess that is something wonderful we share.¡± Stella said.

    ¡°Yes it is!¡± Aileen replied, nodding her head with confidence. ¡°To answer your question, I found you with my Manus Dei. It is about the mass of this city now, so the area it covers is very large. Sensing you was not a problem.¡±

    Stella nodded. She wondered to herself why Aileen even needed to visit CERN in person at all. It would seem that such an activity wasn¡¯t necessary for the girl. For that matter, having a body seemed pointless for Aileen, after all, the girl could be anywhere and everywhere at all times, couldn¡¯t she?

    ¡°Well, we will do that. First though, Elijah and I will spend some more time together. I¡¯ll meet you at the accelerator at noon.¡± Stella explained. She thought for a moment about how the day would go, with her being late for work, as well as bringing Elijah into places he didn¡¯t have access too. She spoke again. ¡°If you could, or if there is a way, would it be possible to make it easy on Elijah and I to have¡­well¡­to have free reign of the place? I don¡¯t want any trouble with being late for work today, or him being someplace he isn¡¯t supposed to be. Is that possible?¡±

    Aileen looked like she was thinking for a moment, before she nodded. ¡°Yes, it is possible.¡±

    ¡°Good.¡± Stella replied, before letting out a breath that she had been holding in without realizing it. After all, it was entirely possible that she had just doomed all of her co-workers. Requesting something from the equivalent of a god was nerve wracking. Then again, consider her position, it didn¡¯t trouble her much whether Aileen had just decided to remove everyone she knew from the facility. ¡°I¡¯ll meet you there then. Right now, I have to shower.¡±This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road. If you spot it on Amazon, please report it.

    Aileen nodded, and then pointed her hand towards the sink. A great mass of black particulate matter materialized from around the room and converged to a point in Aileen¡¯s hand. It shifted and swarmed in a great mass, and from it appeared a toothbrush, a hairbrush and comb, soap and shampoo, and an exact set of clothing that matched what Stella had been wearing the previous day - but clean and new. Many other items followed, including make-up, deodorant, and any item that Stella could need to prepare for a day.

    It was a moment of fascination and awe, and one that proved to Stella that she had been right about Aileen and what their discussion the day before had meant. She had already believed the math, but seeing was believing. Being present to actually witness what Aileen was capable of brought it all full circle. It also caused a chill to run down Stella¡¯s spine, when she realized that Aileen was not just in front of her, but that the girl¡¯s Manus Dei was all around, and was a part of everything that could be seen.

    Aileen then looked at Stella. ¡°Do not spend too much time with him. If too much time passes, then it will be more worthwhile for us to have jumped, than to have maintained my presence here. That has happened once, and I do not want it to happen again.¡±

    ¡°When?¡± Stella asked. It could have been a question asking how long she had left with Elijah, at maximum. It could also have been a question asking when Aileen had run over her limit. Stella herself did not know which she meant. Aileen took it as the latter.

    ¡°When we visited a horrible place in a country called Poland, in 1945. We stayed there too long.¡±

    Stella frowned. ¡°Aileen¡­I don¡¯t know how to put this, but, you should be careful. We humans aren¡¯t like-¡±

    ¡°I am human.¡± Aileen interjected, looking suddenly disturbed. Stella was quick to correct herself.

    ¡°Well, the humans of this time. We¡¯re delicate. Seeing things like that, they hurt and damage us. Elijah has been damaged. I could tell last night. I want him to be happy. You can¡¯t keep taking him to such horrible places. He has to have peace and calm. He has to have good things.¡±

    Aileen nodded. ¡°Yes. He must not be distressed. I must not be either. I feel empathy for living things, and many living things suffered there.¡±

    For a moment, Aileen looked solemn, and Stella smiled. At least the girl was not lying, and understood. Perhaps she really was human.

    ¡°Well then, see you at noon.¡± Stella said, and waved at Aileen. She half expected the girl to just materialize away, but instead Aileen walked out of the bathroom, and then out of the hotel. Elijah remained asleep, and did not see or hear her go.

    Stella cleaned herself up, and during that time Elijah woke up and did the same. They went to a cafe on the lake for breakfast, and after that walked back to CERN. There was little conversation between them, but many happy and satisfied glances. They had said all they needed to say the night before, and these last moments were about nothing more than being in each others presence.

    When they reached CERN they were greeted by a waiting Aileen, and Stella began a tour for little blue haired girl. At first, this was all the day was. For a couple of hours Stella showed both Aileen and Elijah through exhibits, museums, displays, and around the facility itself. Aileen would ask questions, and Stella would answer them. It was knowledge Aileen already knew, but she wanted to hear Stella¡¯s answer. Then, Aileen would correct the answers with new knowledge, and comment on parts she liked.

    Then, they toured the actual facility. They went all over, to places that even Stella had not been too, and to places that none of them were allowed. No one they met objected. In fact, these individuals acted as if their presence was routine and expected.

    Aileen loved every moment of it, and brought smiles to both Stella and Elijah¡¯s faces with her happiness. The girl¡¯s joy was infectious, and urged the lovers past their fear of losing on another, to show the time traveler all they could about the massive science experiment.

    And the time traveler watched. She watched with wide eyes and joy at screens and monitors, and then at the accelerator itself.

    The day ended. It had too, as time marched on. Hours later, as the sun was starting to set, they all found themselves in the same place they had started - at ATLAS, in front of the mural.

    Goodbyes were said quietly, and Stella kissed Elijah one last time, perhaps just because it was fitting to do so. He issued apologies, words were shared about how crazy and insane the whole experience was. Elijah gave advice about how to deal with the difficulties Stella would encounter with him in the future, still naive to the truth of how futile that advice was. Stella did not mind though, she took the comments and thanked him for it.

    Her goodbye to Aileen was much less affectionate, but kind. There was no bitterness in her heart for the little girl, much less resentment or hate. It was Aileen that had given her this moment, after all, and time was a precious thing. The little human being form the future had never lied or given a falsehood, and had held true to everything. And she had even been kind and thoughtful, in a very human way.

    Aileen, for her part, was far more saddened by the departure. She complained about how wonderful Stella was, and how foolish Ellijah and her were for breaking up. She started to cry when Stella said good bye, and gave the woman a hug that Stella halfheartedly returned before agreeing to leave. For Stella, it felt like a total contradiction from the way that she had acted the day before, and even that morning, when she had wanted to jump through time to the future with Elijah, rather than wait a day.

    After that, Aileen and Elijah walked just a short distance away from Stella. Aileen took Elijah¡¯s hand, looking like his little sister or a lost child standing beside him. Stella¡¯s eyes looked directly into Elijah¡¯s, but in a moment of curiosity they wandered to Aileen¡¯s. The girl¡¯s expression was lost, and the gaze of her eyes caused her to look dazed. It was as if she were mentally in another place.

    Then, her eyes snapped back to reality and met Stella¡¯s. It was without words that Stella understood what this meant. She instinctively braced herself, but then relaxed as she realized how silly doing such a thing was. She felt total resignation wash over her, and she smiled at Aileen, who stared back with an unchanging expression.

    Stella waited.

 Extra Chapter - Patience

    The fires were burning dim now, and the heat that came from the conflagration was no longer so oppressive, but the ash in the air stung my eyes and hurt my throat. The toga I wore over a tunic was covered in the stuff, and I realized it would be best to take the garment off. The second layer had helped stave off some of the heat at first, but it was redundant now. I had never been near such a large fire, even in all my travels with Aileen, and the heat it radiated was insufferable.

    The two of us were stuck where we were though, huddled in a little alcove between two stone buildings, till the fire in front of us died down enough for us to walk out. That would be soon, but I realized that we would be waiting here a little longer, because I would have to wait for Aileen to be ready to leave.

    She was still staring at the inferno we had just witnessed, tears rolling down her cheeks and streaking through the ash that was caked to her face. She was not wailing, and she was not crying out like she had before. Now she was just watching, as streams of water fell from her eyes. I wondered if the way that her species cried was unlike mine, and if she could even ¡®ugly cry¡¯ like so many ¡®normal¡¯ humans do.

    Her continued silence was broken by something which I had come to expect of her. A question.

    ¡°Do you remember¡­the woman?¡± she asked, her voice quiet.

    ¡°Who?¡± I asked in response. She had stopped doing this quite a long time ago. That is, she had stopped asking questions that did not give enough context for me to understand them. This was a regression back to old ways then. Perhaps this was caused by her grief?

    ¡°Stella. The woman, you loved?¡± she said, repeating the question but with the context I needed to understand. Her face was still unchanged, and her voice was almost monotone. She stared forward, like she was looking past the fire at something very far away.

    I smiled, and felt nostalgia for my lost love. I had come to accept what had occurred by now though, and so all the time I¡¯d spent with her in my life, the good and the bad, was a joyful memory rather than a regretful one. ¡°Of course I remember her. How could I forget?¡±

    ¡°What is love?¡± Aileen asked. ¡°For your kind?¡±

    I shrugged. The idea that her kind did not have love did not surprise me. When I first started travelling with Aileen I may have been sad or horrified that she could call herself human, but not experience love. Now, I had accepted such strange oddities. I then looked toward the blaze before us, almost mirroring Aileen¡¯s expression. ¡°Like this. Like a fire that burns hot and bright. It is¡­it is not controlled, you don¡¯t get to choose it, and it can hurt you. It is like fire. You want it, because otherwise you are cold.¡±

    I could not tell for sure, but it looked like more tears fell from her eyes at that moment.

    ¡°This...fire.¡± Aileen said. ¡°This fire will burn you out...Do not show me anymore of this love, I do not wish to see it in your histories, or know it. It is horrible.¡±

    I looked at her with some confusion, but then sighed and accepted it. I would understand in time what she meant. After deciding that, I launched into what had become my normal response to her questions, a question of my own.

    ¡°Does your kind have love?¡± I asked.

    Aileen blinked. Her tears flow was stemmed, but she continued to stare forward. For a long moment she said nothing. Every now and then, she would blink. Then, I saw a little smile on her face, as if I had reminded her of something nice. It made me curious.

    ¡°Is that a yes or a no?¡± I pressed. Now I was interested, and not just asking a question in response to hers per a routine.

    ¡°Yes.¡± she said, and she wiped away tears from her eyes, careful not to smudge ash into them. Her wide blue eyes looked bright and clean against her ash covered face.This novel is published on a different platform. Support the original author by finding the official source.

    ¡°Well then, what is it like?¡±

    Once more, she stopped. I could not tell what she was doing whenever she did this, rare as it was. I had always assumed that she was just thinking, but in recent times I had become less sure of that. Her mind, her soul, had more computing power than the entire modern world. Why would she ever need to think?

    ¡°It is patient, and kind. The stories of love you¡¯ve shown me now¡­they are about pride and envy. They tell the world of their love. Love does not do that. Your love tears down. It is selfish. It is angry. It looks for mistakes. Love does not do those things. Love is honest. Love is trust, hope, protection, and perseverance. It-¡±

    ¡°-it never fails.¡± I finished. My chest ached as I said the words. The ache came from want and from envy. I had showed Aileen so much of human history, and at the end she had concluded that our love, the thing which we wrote poems and songs about, which so many of us sought incessantly, was insufficient and terrible. Yet here she was, quoting back to me our very own beliefs about love. ¡°Where did you hear that?¡±

    ¡°Hear what?¡± she asked, her eyes now moving to look at mine, as if searching for my meaning.

    ¡°Who taught you that verse? It isn¡¯t exact, but you paraphrased a verse from the Bible.¡± I explained.

    ¡°Is that the religious book you used to read a lot?¡± Aileen asked.

    I nodded. ¡°Yes, that one. What you said is a verse in it, about love.¡±

    ¡°Which love?¡± Aileen said. She looked confused. ¡°My kind did not exist when that was written. It could not have been our love that you humans were talking about, and that verse does not describe your kind¡¯s love.¡±

    ¡°No, you are right, it doesn¡¯t. I that perhaps the verse was trying to describe perfect love. Ideal love. Not like¡­not like romantic love or even human love.¡±

    ¡°But it is human love. I am human.¡± Aileen replied.

    I considered her words before speaking. I looked at her and smiled. ¡°But how did you know that verse?¡±

    She shrugged, and then leaned her head against my shoulder, as if tired. ¡°It is wisdom that my kind have. It is something that was once told to us by our ancestors, and that my love told me.¡±

    ¡°You - you have someone? Who are they?¡± I said, my eyes going wide and accidentally catching a little ash in them. I winced and tried to get it out of my eye as quick as possible. It was not long before Aileen noticed my struggle, and extended a hand towards my eye. I paused by attempts at wiping the ash away, which was only worsened by my fingers rubbing my eyes, and tried my best to stand still. Her Manus Dei reached out with a precision that kept me from even feeling it and cleaned all of the foreign matter out of my eyes. It didn¡¯t feel like my eyes had been washed, but they felt better than even before I had caught a piece of ash in them.

    ¡°Yes.¡± Aileen replied, and she smiled. ¡°They are the one who initiates the jumps, and I speak to them when I am quiet and staring. They are a helper to me, and a partner in research.¡±

    And just like that, when I had thought Aileen was out of revelations to give me, I was amazed again. This entire time I had been working not with one of her kind, but two. I remembered all the times she had gone quiet and stared onwards, as if in another place, and realized that in those times she had not been thinking - as I suspected - but she had instead been speaking to someone somewhere else.

    ¡°Could I meet this someone?¡± I asked, grinning a bit at the thought of Aileen with a significant other. Did they also look just as childlike? Were they another girl or a boy? It raised so many questions I had not thought of before.

    ¡°No. They cannot come here. It is already difficult with one of us here. Two of my kind would ruin the experiment.¡± she explained, and then her face fell a bit. She reached out to the air, and caught a piece of burning ash. She closed her fist around it and then opened it again. There was dust covering her palm, much like the rest of the ash on the two of us. ¡°What happens when your love burns out?¡±

    It was hard question. So often you hear songs of never ending love, and of love that would last till the end of time. I wanted to believe those songs. I always had thought I¡¯d find true love one day. I had always thought that there would be something magical and wonderful about it. All of that had been true of the love that I had found, but it had not lasted. Now, I was not so sure.

    ¡°Well, once that love is gone, we must move on. We must die.¡±

    ¡°Time. Chaos.¡± Aileen said, and then stood up. It was apparent that she was ready to leave. The fire was getting cooler, and we¡¯d be able to escape our little alcove without being incinerated. ¡°To a cold end.¡±

    ¡°To what?¡± I asked.

    ¡°I do not know.¡± Aileen replied. ¡°Perhaps that is why I could not find it sad or beautiful, the love that you have. I empathize, I understand. That is why I gave you the time you had with Stella. However, it is not your kind¡¯s most wonderful thing. It is your most dreadful. It is the most terrible thing about you. It is horrible. It would better, that you be alone.¡±

    ¡°Why?¡±

    She looked down at the ash in her palm and frowned. ¡°Because it will burn you to ash. All of you with it.¡±