《Nobody Expected a Normal Story》 CH 0 CH 0: UN-named It''s a goblin... definitely a goblin... He approaches Him... He definitely approaches Him... He is scared... He is definitely scared! He close his eyes and prays to the holy flex tape... in that moment, the boy hear a noise like a shoot of an anti-materiel rifle followed by the sound of the blood splashing the ground. When He open his eyes theres is a woman whith a bloody sword front of him.If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, it''s taken without the author''s consent. Report it. "are you OK, newbie?" "..." "newbie?" "..." He is not looking at her chest... He definitely is not looking at her chest... maybe a little... "are you alive?" "Eh...oh, sorry" "sorry for what? for being inert or looking at my chest, by the way, you''re still doing it" at last, something in his brain realized that the women front of him had a face. "S-sorry abaout T-that!" the woman put her arms in jugs, looked at the infinite with pride and said... "Dont worry, newbie, i am a guy in real life!" "eh...EEEEEEEEEEH!" in case you have not understood the reference of the anti-material rifle here I explain it to you, in dark souls when you parry some enemy correctly that sound sounds CH 1: The Xcube and the girl. CH 1: The Xcube and the girl Today is the day that John has been waiting for two years... We''re in the year two thousand thirty seven and two years ago a group of programmers develop a new video game hardware that allows the user to immerse themselves in a totally realistic world, when john heard abaout this a inmense happines flooded him, He needed to enter that new virtual world...but He was a sixteen year old teenager with no money...BUT now he is a eigthteen years old men with a temporary job who just received his first salary, now he have the power of the money and he know how to use it. *Sometimes I wonder who I am or why am i here telling you the story of John but I stopped asking those questions a long time ago,I came to the conclusion that I am only an existence that the author has created on a whim and that will not change*
There are two hours left until they open the video game store so John decided to spend them playing Black Souls 3, it is a game of great difficulty although it is already very old, He also put on the headphones to listen to a song of powerdog.
TWO HOURS LATER THREE HOURS LATER SEVEN HOURS LATER "And this is how you complete black souls 3 in two hours ..."John said. "Maybe seven..." "Shit..." He takes his backpack and runs out of his house in the direction of the video game store, it only takes one hour for them to close and not reopen until next Monday and that is the time it takes to go there from his house, John runs as much as his legs can bear while he attracts some looks. When he arrives at the store that is about to close he goes directly to the hall where the precious device is, but ..., it is empty, at that moment John felt like his fragile heart was shattered and with the lost look he leaves the establishment to fall to the floor with watery eyes. "What happen?!" A girl approached to the inert body of John to try to help him to stand up and then she took him to a bench so he could sit down and she wonders what had happened to him... "what a coincidence, the same thing happened to me, I started playing fallin 4 and in the end I was late to the store" She said "really?" He looked at the girl in the face and saw the prettiest smile he had ever seen, now that he looks at her very well she is very pretty,the girl seemed to be my age she will be around 5.4 feet tall, her black hair fell on her generous chest, she had hips that rivaled the width of her shoulders and her face was the most beautiful thing he had seen since the twenty-seven cheese pizza... "But do not worry, I have a solution" she said. "Which?" "There is a store that opens 24 hours a day, seven days a week but is a bit far and not many people know it, I prefer to go to others because to get to this store you have to take the bus and it still takes half an hour but now i have no choice, if you want you can come with me" "YES MA''AM!" "Haha, I''m Alice, and you?" "I''m John, nice to meet you, Alice" they saw something that woke up John''s battle instinct... There were two Knights Templar fighting with swords and shouting "Deus lo Vult" John realized that one of them was wearing a t-shirt with the logo of the store so it should be the manager, knowing who he had to help, John took his backpack and take out his own Templar helmet and his sword, he looked at Alice and he was surprised to see that she also took out her Templar equipment, how perfect she can be. "you know the fighting style in pairs of the holy brothers, right?" "Of course" At the same time the two were put in combat position and ran one to each side and then make a symmetrical cut on each side of the unknown Templar, the victory was theirs. es, it has been, but, if you had not appeared I would have lost, thanks again, brothers" Manager said. "Do the blood order attack you often?"ask Alice "No, he only attacks me from time to time, he is called store manager the second, he is the owner of the store across the street, we are rivals since children". "as long as that is just ok" CH 2: A virtual world. CH 2: A VIRTUAL WORLD ¡°Here is your Xcubes, brothers¡± In that moment an incredible happiness flooded their bodies, at last they have a Xcube. John takes out his Templar sword and cross it with the manager¡¯s sword in signal of respect, then Alice do the same. They farewell Manager of the Store the third and take out of the store to go to their homes. On the path John and Alice talks about things that they would do when he get into the game, they decide to begin the game together because they already be weapons partners. A few minutes later Alice and John farewell themselves and go to their own homes. When john arrives to his house, he goes to his room to install the Xcube at fast as possible, when the installation was complete, he gets into the game. A few seconds later. John was on an infinite white place and a non-gender voice speaks to him. ¡°welcome to the world of T.O.P.A.K.A.M.E, topakame if you prefer, I am your virtual assistant, I¡¯m here to help you in your travel on this new world, but only with technical things, I can¡¯t help you with the game¡± ¡°that sound good to me, but¡­ where are you?¡± john asks. ¡°Oh, let me a second¡± When the non-gender voice finish that words the infinite white space change to a Templar castle, in front of the castle there is a maid¡­a maid with cat ears, generous chest, white hair, and a ponytail. John quickly realized that this maid was the embodiment of his fetishes. ¡°I am your assistant, master-nya¡± the angelical maid said with a pristine voice. When John hear the ¡°nya¡± he feels a prick in his heart, but don¡¯t worry good reader that was a good prick. John embrace the maid and she caressed his head. he could give john all the love that his vampire daughter didn''t give him in his role-playing games. when John had recovered of that emotional moment, he talks to the maid.The author''s tale has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon. ¡°what is your name¡± he asks. ¡°I don¡¯t have any name but you can give me one, master-nya¡± ¡°Your name will be¡­Nema¡± Nobody realize that the name is a word game being Ne of Neko and Ma of Maid. ¡°Thanks, master-nya from now my name is Nema, nice to meet you master-nya¡± she said. ¡°Nema, can you change this place into a shinobi dojo¡± ¡°Yes master-nya, but I think that you like this place¡± ¡°I like it but, recently I play a game named, Sokoiro Shadows dies a lot, in that game you are a great shinobi, and I want to play like that here¡± John said. ¡°I understand now, ok master-nya, close your eyes please¡± John close his eyes. ¡°you can open your eyes now master-nya¡± When John opens his eyes he where in a shinobi dojo whit katanas in the walls and three little cats playing on the tatami. ¡°Thanks Nema that¡¯s perfect¡± John said ¡°master-nya, now I going to tell you some of my functions, I can help you with any technical problem, you can talk with me in any moment with only think, I am allowed to have relations with you, I¡­¡± ¡°Wait, I hear something interesting¡± John interrupts the Nema explanation. ¡°¡­¡± John looks at Nema¡¯s face and it was completely red, John even though he saw a smoke coming out of his head. ¡°Nema¡± John calls her. ¡°W-wha-what ma-master-nya¡± ¡°you should know since you''re in my head, I don''t plan on doing anything dirty to you because now I have an objective called Alice¡± John said. ¡°Master-nya, you can choose an initial equipment¡± she completely change¡¯s the subject. ¡°You completely change the subject¡± John confirms. ¡°You must choose the shinobi initial equipment, Here¡± In that moment his clothes changed into a medieval clothes with a leader chest and a katana appears in his belt. ¡°Now it¡¯s the tame to edit your avatar, master-nya¡± The first thing he did was to try lengthen what you and I know, but for any reason (Nema) he couldn¡¯t did it. Then he changes his hair colour from black to black. ¡°Are you ready master?¡± ¡°Yes¡± john said with a determinate look in his eyes. ¡°close your eyes, master nya¡± He closes his eyes and when he opens it again he was in the middle of main square of the initial town. He looks around searching for the "white lady" tavern where she was going to meet with Alice. He saw the tavern quickly and in front of the establishment there is Alice with the same pretty face but now he had different colour eyes and his hair changes to light brown. He approaches to Alice and greets her, she greets him back and they enter together in the tavern. There is so many people of both genders drinking and talking. ¡°That¡¯s how a typical tavern doujinshi or hentai begins¡± John said to Alice: ¡°Ye¡­¡± ¡°You said HENTAI!?¡± a strange voice said back to John. John turns around himself and he shook¡¯s the stranger¡¯s hand, at that moment, an unwavering friendship was forged by the most powerful reason possible, the hentai ... ¡°what is your name, newbie?¡± ¡°I am John and her name is Alice¡± ¡°people call me Christoff¡± Christoff said. ¡°excuse me but¡­ why are you playing rock, paper, scissors¡± Alice asks. ¡°Don¡¯t ask why¡± Christoff and John said at the same time. CH 3: Triennial routine of an ancient dragon. CH 3: Triennial routine of an ancient dragon. In a faraway mountain, Inside of a giant dark cave, a great creature is awakening of its hibernation of 3 years to set course to a certain low level city. By the way, it`s an ancient dragon named Henry. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- *Henry the dragon POV* ¡°Uaaaaaaaah¡± I yawn. It`s been three years since I went to sleep, That was fast! I want to sleep more! ¡°Wrrrrrrrrrrrrr¡± Looks like my stomach doesn¡¯t think so. I should hunt a whale or something to eat a little. Usually I will hunt three or four of them to been satisfied, but I`ve recently woken up and I want a light breakfast; you have to have healthy food habits. I leave my cave and a bright sun burns my eyes. It hurts, but that¡äs what¡äs after three years of sleep, I need to get used to it. When my eyes finally have used to the sun, I¡¯m starting to fly, move my wings gently so has not destroy the mountain, I am an ancient dragon after all. While I fly I see a group of humans working the field near their village, although they can¡ät see me, I`m ten kilometres away, I am an ancient dragon after all. The sea is far away so I decide to take advantage of this and quench the hunger of my human form, yeah I have a human form, I am an ancient dragon after all. I land on a plain about five kilometres of the village and transform my dragon self into a human one, it feels strange to be so small but in this way I am much more agile and above all I don''t scare people, my human aspect is that of a tall young man with black hair and purple eyes, before I kept my horns but with the practice I managed to make them disappear too, I am an ancient dragon after all. I walk towards the town and it turns out that I was wrong, it is not a town of humans but it was a town of semi-humans specifically of hyenas. I enter the town and the first thing I see is that it is full of activity, children playing ball, and their mothers chatting, vendors shouting prices, a farmer with a flock of sheep ... a few minutes later a woman approached me to welcome me to the town, it seemed to be the mayor. I never liked hyena women because they have what you and I know, cat or dog girls are fine but not hyenas, although the best are dragons.You could be reading stolen content. Head to Royal Road for the genuine story. ¡°Welcome to our humble people sir, but why are you naked?¡± the mayor said. Shit, I forgot that. Instantly I make a black t-shirt and pants out of nowhere, I am an ancient dragon after all. ¡°who is naked? I am not naked, you are not naked, nobody is naked, are you sure you are well, miss?¡± I said. ¡°it''s just that I''m a little tired, lately the crops are not going well and we are running out of supplies, I''ve been awake for two nights trying to find a solution to our problem but I can''t think of anything.¡± "I could help you" I am a good dragon "but in return I want you to give me food" I am a good dragon but a hungry one too. The mayor''s face lit up and she showed an expression of happiness mixed with despair "We will make a feast in your honor if you can help us" she said. A banquet in my honor, uh, sounds good, it seems that I will have to make an effort here. "I have to go to a place where I can see all your lands," I say to the mayor "from there I can do something" "There is a perfect place, on the hill on the other side of our lands there is a small sanctuary to the goddess of fertility, from there you can see all our lands" the mayor said. A few minutes later¡­ Finally, I arrive at the sanctuary, on the way I noticed the crops and they were indeed dry and withered but luckily it did not seem to be a curse just a bad year. I look at the sanctuary with suspicion, I never like those gods, but I hold on and enter. The mayor did not lie from here there is a perfect view of the domains of the town, but I did not come here to admire the views, I remember to remember the spell Yes, I can do spells, I am an ancient dragon after all. ¡°[augebatur fertilitate abundat rerum castra]¡± When I finish singing those words, the fields begin to bloom at a dizzying pace, the dead plants revive with the brightest green, flowers leave their branches for a short time after giving way to their fruits, from here I can see people in the fields scream with happiness, but none of that matters, the really important thing here is that I will finally be able to eat. Three hours later¡­ aah, the banquet was delicious, although I think they were not expecting me to eat everything, after the banquet the mayor called me and told me that in a small town east of here, two years ago I had begun to believe so much in population as in size and that a lot of adventurers went out there to explore the world, this seemed very strange to me so I decided to go research and now I am flying in the direction of that city. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- *Story teller pov. * Meanwhile, two idiots played rock paper scissors without knowing that an ancient dragon named Henry was approaching.