《Misadventures Of Adventurers》 This is Chapter 1 A man is standing on the ledge of a building, the expression on his face clearly expresses his morbid desire, which is to jump from there and end his life. The only thing he wants is to be one with oblivion What a fucking pleb, suddenly the little bitch starts crying and stars murmuring to himself "I can''t fucking do it, I am too fucking young to die" he gets off the ledge and lies down in a fetal position, this is the most pathetic thing I have seen in my life, holy shit. As the man was crying like a little bitch, someone entered the roof, and saw him doing all the shit, the person approached the pathetic man and said "what are you doing ? ", the crying man looked up, the person who asked him the question was an ancient man, I mean like really old, not really ancient, I don''t know the exact age,I am just guessing because he looks really wrinkly. The pussy man replies " I am trying to kill myself " as he stands up " but I can''t even do that". "Well kid, you are not the first one," the old man says to him while he lights up a cigarette "what do you mean ?" "Its nothing, may I ask why are you thinking of killing yourself," says the old man with his eyes piercing inside the pathetic man''s soul. The man does not answer. "Why are you not saying anything? I know confronting your problem is hard but you should not give up" "No, the reason for my suicide is debt, I am just thinking why you didn''t answer my question when I asked what do you mean by you are not the first one" "You are indeed a fucking pleb" the man smiles and says "Yep, bruh" Both of them, then sat on the ledge, admiring the beautiful city the old man says to the pathetic man "Look you will never be able to pay 100 billion dollars in your entire lifetime " the old man throws the cigarette. The pathetic man picks up the cigarette thrown by the old man and starts smoking it. "you know that I can offer you a cigarette" "There is no need," the pathetic man says while looking up to the sky "the company I worked for went bankrupt, and the company I thought which will help me, is the reason I am in this huge debt, and now people from that company is harassing me every day and beating the shit out of me, they are probably going to take everything from me, for them I am already dead". "what company is that ?" "T" the old man suddenly stands up and slowly starts laughing. "What the fuck you are laughing about, you old fuck," the pathetic man says to him "Hey bitch, what is your name," the old man asks him "Jord, Jord hearo" " that''s a stupid name", the old man puts his hands inside his pocket and takes out his phone This tale has been unlawfully obtained from Royal Road. If you discover it on Amazon, kindly report it." Alright listen to me Jord I am giving you an address of a person who might be able to help you out in your situation alright ?" " I don''t understand" " What the fuck you mean by you don''t understand, give me your phone I am going to save that person''s address in it" " Oh now I understand " After this meeting, the old man left, Jord didn''t have anything else to do so he stayed on the roof all day and then went to the address the next morning. The address took him to a big mansion, but the place felt more like a historical site than an actual home. He rung the bell, and suddenly the door opened automatically, he entered the house and saw a beautiful woman sitting the entrance. The woman looked at him with her beautiful brown eyes, Jord was mesmerized by her, he couldn''t take his eyes off her. The woman said, " Who are you ?" Jord lost his train of thought, it''s probably still in "she is so hot" station. That woman again said " who in the actual fuck are you " Jord now quickly replies " Yes, I am Jord hearo, an old man on the roof of a random building gave me your address, he told me that, you can help me get out of my huge fucking debt" the woman smiles and says " oh the old man on the roof of a random building sent you, haha" the idiot just realize that he didn''t know the old man''s name " oh shit, I am sorry I don''t know the old man''s name, fuck!" " You just said it" "what ?" " his name you just said it" "I didn''t" "old man on the roof of a random building" "what I don''t understand " she gestures him to come in. " Wait, his fucking name is the old man on the roof of a random building !?" " That''s not the fucking point, the point is that I am going to help you to get rich, and not only that the situation you are in is probably because of the elevator company T, right?" "Yeah, how do you know that ?" Jord says in a surprised fucking manner. "Well because I told the old man I need someone to help me in DESTROYING THAT FUCKING COMPANY " " You wanna do what !?" "Listen Jord, I am not just your run off the mill bimbo, I am the daughter of the founder of P" "P?" "Yeah, it was a rival elevator company, but after the murder of my father, the company was in absorbed by T, when I say absorb I mean DESTROYED" "Oh, wait your father was murdered" " Yeah, I think by the CEO of T, but I am not sure " " Oh cool" the woman grabs Jord''s hand and looks in his eyes and says "Will you work-" Jord interrupts her and starts nodding "oh cool," says the woman All of a sudden something enters the living room where the woman and Jord were sitting, it''sa sentient gelatin in a plate which is moving towards Jord, it looks at him and says " sup" Jord looks at the woman and asks her "what''s your name " she replies " Robertina" Jord says with a smile on his face "cool" Robertina replies "same". I think this is chapter 2 Jord and Robertina were sitting on the couch and eating some popcorn, while they waited for their favorite show "Harder daddy, Work Harder!!!" to start. Jord stands up and says " don''t we have something to do" "what" Robertina replies " Yes, we were about to fucking DESTROY T" "oh fuck yeah!!" Robertina jumps out of the couch as she was sitting inside of it. " Yeah, like why were you sitting inside of the couch, like how is that even possible" Jord exotically says to Robertina "I didn''t say that exotically," says Jords exotically. " I will tell you everything," Robertina says to Jord "walk with me" Both of them starts walking on the corridor of the house " where are we going, " asks Jord "to the garage" replies Robertina with a grin on her face " okay why" "Jord, there many things in this world which are not confined to the sense of common" "Alright," says Jord in a confusing manner. "how do you think. the company T is so fucking popular" " because they make fucking great elevators" "not exactly" Robertina opens a door which leads to a staircase. "How big is this fucking house," says Jord while walking down the stairs "bigger than your dad''s asshole, lol" replies Robertina "what were you saying about the company T" "Oh yeah, so T does not make elevators, rather they disguise Teleporting machines which can teleport to different parallel dimensions as elevators " " that''s rad" " no, it is not" Robertina stops and looks at Jord "Listen, before getting murdered, my father told me that CEO of T wants to sell earth to some interdimensional being but for some reason, he failed to come up with a reasonable price, but this time I think he will, so we have to fucking stop him, you nonce" " Okay I understand now," says Jord and then he turns around and starts examing the house. " But why these fucking weird things are in your house ?" If you encounter this story on Amazon, note that it''s taken without permission from the author. Report it."what do you mean" Jord points towards a chair which has three hands coming out of it and appears to be fucking a table. " oh yeah, my father company did the same thing but weren''t successful as T" stoically replies Robertina. At last, our two heroes reached the garage. As Robertina opened the door, the first thing Jord sees is a beautiful but weird Red convertible. Robertina jumps into the car and turns it on, as she turns on the engine, a weird voice starts coming out of the car "what the fuck," says Jord "Jord, get in we don''t have much time" replies Robertina Jord gets inside the car. Robertina looks at Jord and says "Alright listen Jord, this car is not a normal, its kind of a teleporter" "okay" replies Jord " So where are we going, I thought the main building of T is in our normal dimension" "No, it is not present in our dimension. The building you see in this world is just a facade". "Okay, then you should know in what dimension their building is in, right ?" "Yes you are right, my uncle knows the exact location," Robertina says to Jord enthusiastically "what, I didn''t say that, " Jord says to Robertina with a smile. "Okay so basically you are saying that first, we need to find my uncle who is most probably in the dimension foggy fog 1, and then ask him about the location of T" " what is going on, " Jord says to Robertina with a straight face. Robertina hits the accelerator, the car dashes out of the garage. Jord can''t stop screaming and Robertina can''t stop smiling, as they reached the main road Robertina presses a peculiar red button on the steering wheel and says to Jord " READY TO GET BUTTFUCKED" Jord screams " NOOOOOO" Suddenly a lightning bolt hits the car and the car disappears. WHAT, they disappeared? where? I should know that I am narrating this story, what the fuck, don''t leave me alone here. What should I do now, who am I going to talk about, What the fuck is going on !? I am the fucking narrator MOTHERFUCKERS. I am not sure if this is chapter 3 Hey Guys, so the narrator just died because of that from now on the story is going to be presented in a first-person perspective of the main protagonist Jord Hearo. We were in the middle of the desert when the fucker started chasing us. He was a naked half amoeba and half amphibian being with the head of a giraffe. When Robertina saw it, she said " oh shit, that fucker is still alive, okay hold up ", and started driving real fucking fast. I don''t know what to do, I left the world of the normal and now living in the world of the surreal. Did you know this story is from Royal Road? Read the official version for free and support the author.Suddenly Robertina grabbed my dick. "what fuck is going on" I screamed at her. "I need you fucking semen, cuck" she replied to my scream I thought it is happening boys, my virgin life will be over now, fuck yeah. " I need it to kill the fucker ", she said that to me while she took out her water gun, which she called it a "Semen Gun", so its kind of self-explanatory what is going on. So I did what had to be done, Robertina then turned her car around and started driving towards the fucker, she told me to take the wheel, while she aimed the gun at the thing. She shot my semen at that thing and the moment my cum touched the thing''s skins, it transformed into a pile of bullshit. I am pretty sure this is chapter 4 I could only see neon signs everywhere, I couldn''t read what was written on them and where the glowing arrows pointed at because except the neon signs everything else was pitch black. "yo Robertina what''s going on, " I said to Robertina as we were walking deep into the black abyss. "Well, this dimension is the neon signs dimension " "No shit" Robertina went on " this dimension is a gateway to another dimension where we have to meet someone who can help us with our quest" "Why don''t we just use the car," I asked "because I accidentally sent it to the other dimension without us" Robertina picked up her pace as she said that. "Alright, I guess we have to go through this shitty dimension," I said to Robertina as she looked at me with a weird expression on her face. "what," I said " 7 legged strippers RUN," said Robertina then she pointed behind be and behold there was 7 legged stripper and by the way, the legs were on her head.Love this novel? Read it on Royal Road to ensure the author gets credit. I was running behind Robertina, even though my stamina is bad I did my best to stay close to her. I thought to myself which I am doing a lot nowadays; why is this happening? I was a normal dude, alright not normal but still a dude, and now I am running away from 7 legged strippers, and the scary part is that I find them fucking hot and I want to-- "yo Jord there is the gate," Robert said to me " A Gate? " I looked in front and there it was a big ass gate with exit written on it ( in a subtle way) As we were about the reach the gate, more seven-legged strippers came in front of it, blocking our way, Robertina took out her bra and started spinning it around and the moment the bra span, blades came out of it and then she used it as a weapon to kill the 7 legged strippers. It was a cool experience and everyone should at least try this, and yeah, in the end, we managed to get out of there. thank you for coming to my ted talk. chapter 5, finally Recently I''ve been thinking about my life a lot, like seriously I don''t have a single fucking clue about what''s going on, everything is just going out of my control, but somehow I like that. And I might sound crazy when I say this but I like being not in control sometimes, I just feel like I don''t want to be the leader of my life every single fucking moment. It feels amazing when things happening in your life are not the result of your action, but because of some kind of controllable force that cannot be stopped. What am I even saying ? am I making any kind of sense, whatever, I stopped caring about my train of thoughts, moreover what kind of idiom train of thoughts is anyway, why it can''t be the airplane of thoughts or boat of thoughts, ropeway of thoughts? wait I just remembered the train of thoughts is an idiom which uses the train in the sense of an "orderly sequence," and was first recorded in 1651, in philosopher Thomas Hobbs''s Leviathan. I don''t believe in common sense, I mean yes there might be a common thing that makes sense to everyone but common sense to an extent is not "common". Okay, wait let''s not get ahead of ourselves lets first define what is exactly common sense, so according to the Cambridge dictionary, common sense is the basic level of practical knowledge and judgment that we all need to help us live a reasonable and safe way. Use of this word in a sentence; Anyone with any common sense would have known what to do. "Anyone with any common sense would have known" that''s a really interesting choice of words; so there are people who might not have common sense and this not necessarily means that they are dumb or stupid or dumb stupid cunts this means that common sense can be fucking subjective. I know not in every fucking sense common sense is subjective like when people say "close the top of the bottle with its cap so that water does not spill out" I understand that but when people say "Woah man you don''t have a common sense of not telling him about the secret thing I am working on" yes i don''t have that, same thing with art " Woah man you don''t have the common sense of understanding this piece of shit made by a piece i.e this "book" " yes I don''t have a common sense I just have some senses that I like to depend upon for my day to day life.Support the author by searching for the original publication of this novel. A baby in a capsule, flying in a deep empty void which harbors only one planet. The capsule lands on that planet and the baby crawls out of it and sleeps on the land of the strange but Earth-like planet, he grows up on that planet alone, no stars in space, no animals in the land, no one like him on this planet except some weird plants.loneliness is his greatest friend and also his greatest enemy. At the age of 87, he dies by killing himself in a ravine, why he did that, we will never know because no one was there with him. "STOP THINKING" Robertina screamed at me while she held my hand in front of the interdimensional hole. "Why?" I whispered at her. "BECAUSE YOU CANNOT STOP" she again screamed at me even though I could hear her perfectly. "Why?" I whispered at her. "BECAUSE THIS DIMENSION WOULD NOT LET YOU STOP THINKING ABOUT STUFF, ITS GOOD TO THINK ABOUT SHIT THAT MATTERS BUT THE GREATEST THING ABOUT HUMAN MIND IS THAT SOMETIMEs IT ASLO NEEDS A BREAK AND NEEDS TO DO SOMETHING ELSE AND THEN GET BACK AT DOING THE SAME THING AGAIN, SO YEAH DOING SOMETHING ELSE IS ALSO IMPORTANT" she screamed. "OKAY" I also screamed at her Then we both jumped into the interdimensional hole and fell through seven different dimensions and land on our interdimensional car and ride off to the sunsets of the Sun dimension. Chater 7 is here lol We were both relaxing on a purple couch that we found on the corner of the street in the Dimension ZakX. The car was getting repaired and there was nothing better to do. Robertina was on the left side of the couch, laying in a fetal position. I was on the right side sitting, normally. I was tired after all those shitty but interesting "adventures" if I can even call them that. I didn''t know what''s going to happen next, so the break felt pretty justified. Suddenly Robertina got out of the fetal position and looked at me. " Do you know about the enormous spot that you can see on Jupiter?" she said. "The planet?, " I replied with a perplexed look on my face. "Yes, what else did you fucking think when I said, Jupiter. " She said with an irritated voice. "We are fucking dimension-hopping, I don''t know what is what" "Well the circumstances are indeed pretty strange," She said while looking up, "but that''s the human value that we are giving to all of this shit, that we are doing ".This tale has been unlawfully obtained from Royal Road. If you discover it on Amazon, kindly report it. " what ?" I said with a high tone. " Okay," she said while moving closer to me. I got a little nervous. "Look at this couch" "Alright," I said while looking at it. "Why do we call it a couch, because we humans made it, so we thought we should also name it, right ?" "Yeah I guess so" "There you go, The human value is inserted into this inanimate object," she said while standing up, "So if we remove all the human factors from this non-living thing, this " thing" becomes a strange object that we cannot relate to" "So the couch is not a couch" "Exactly you don''t know what a couch is in the first place, this "thing" if we can even call it that becomes just a piece of wood with some fluffy fucking stuff, on which we sit or sleep ".She grabbed me and said " What is sleeping anyways, laying on a flat surface till we pass out so that we can regain energy or some shit" She then grabbed my head and turned it toward the main road. "Look at that being," she said while pointing towards a creature standing on the main road of the city. It had three heads on top of each other. "If you ask that thing, what is your opinion about dimension-hopping, he might just reply it is pretty normal. " Are you making any kind of sense?" I asked her with squinted eyes. " Yes If you remove the human value from it". She smiled " Come let''s go" "Alright" I got up from the couch and started walking with Robertina to the main road. The couch just sat there doing nothing.