ã€ŠLife in a Red Worldã€‹


 I - My Lonely Red World

    Let me pose a question. What is it that causes a social trend to die?

    The common response, of course, would be tied to the momentary popularity of said trend. Maybe it was no longer popular, or nobody thought much of it anymore. Or maybe it is tied to a decline in popularity rather than a nebulous ¡®amount¡¯. Whichever the more common response is, it doesn¡¯t change the fact that I disagree with it. What I believe causes a trend to die is, simply put, the subsequent mockery by its own followers. The moment a trend is mocked as ¡®mainstream¡¯ or ¡®basic¡¯, it is already on its deathbed. I should know. After all, that was effectively the story of my life.

    The moment I was born, I became the fad that creates a million fans. Of course, I don¡¯t mean that literally. I was simply a genetic oddity that sparked fascination among doctors and citizens alike. As soon as they looked into my eyes, they saw something thought impossible: bright red irises, and black pupils. Effectively, I had the red equivalent of what most people would consider ¡®eye color¡¯. Of course, red eyes in and of themselves are nothing out of the ordinary. The color, while indeed rare, is commonly linked with albinism, or can occur as a result of blood vessels becoming visible through the iris. However, that was exactly what made me so ¡°special¡±. There was no evidence that I suffered from albinism, or that my eyes were at all abnormal. In fact, all signs pointed to my strange eye color being a result of natural pigmentation in my eye, like any other common color. As a result, my birth certificate read: ¡®Retter Hanson, Eye Color: Red¡¯. I imagine it was all they could do to not add ¡®(Please don¡¯t ask questions).¡¯

    Thankfully, while doctors were apparently eager to run experiments on me for the sake of ¡°research¡±, my parents were adamantly opposed to any work that wasn¡¯t directly related to my health. Considering the pushovers they are, I could only imagine that their response was driven by a momentary determination rather than their nature. Of course, that only got the doctors off my back. The rest of my life was another story.

    When I was first introduced by the teacher in my first school class, the first question anyone asked was, ¡°Why are his eyes red?¡± In the overly sensitive world we live in today, I imagine the teacher had quite the conversation with that kid afterward. Not that it had any effect on the rest of my time in elementary school, however. While the first year or so was like any fad, with everyone wanting to be friends with ¡°red-eyes¡± as if it was cool, by the time I was in second grade I was the one kid nobody wanted to be friends with. I¡¯m not sure whether they were just getting conscious of their own popularity, or were scared of me, or both, but all of a sudden everyone began avoiding me like the plague. Before long, I was the target of active bullying. People must have realized that the young red-eyed kid was all alone, and decided to rub it in a little bit. Needless to say, the teachers never stepped in, and my parents were too gutless to do anything about it themselves. I was effectively all alone in the world by that point.

    At least, until that day.

    It was a nondescript day in October of my junior year of high school, during lunch. I always fancied eating lunch in a particular corner of the courtyard. Most people ate with their friends in the giant cafeteria the school housed, meaning the courtyard was usually empty. Combine that with a nicely placed tree for some valuable shade and a convenient bench, and it was perfect for a recluse like myself. I had been eating there for two years at that point, and not once did anyone take a seat next to me, only stopping by to gawk (or, if they were bolder, spit on me).

    On this day, however, things were different. I had taken a step away from the bench for several minutes to visit the bathroom. Even though I had already eaten, I didn¡¯t feel the need to bring my backpack with me, since I would just find myself back here anyway and there wasn¡¯t enough time in the transit period for anyone to do anything suspicious. I had done it plenty of times, and not once had anyone tried anything. This false sense of security left me quite surprised to find something out of the ordinary when I returned.

    A girl I had never seen had taken a seat next to my backpack and begun eating lunch. Putting aside the fact that it was twenty minutes into the lunch period and she was just getting started, I was dumbfounded how I had never seen a girl as pretty as her around, with her smooth skin and long, black hair. I didn¡¯t really know many of my classmates, but I had a pretty good memory, and I was confident I didn¡¯t know her at all. Still, she felt the necessity to sit in this quiet corner of campus for lunch, and if she was anything like me then she had a good reason to be here. As a result, I opted not to say anything, simply picking up my backpack and sitting down next to her.

    Of course, I was at least well versed in common courtesy, and I didn¡¯t want to creep her out any more than I already did.

    ¡°Do you mind if I sit down too?¡± I asked.

    I didn¡¯t intend to leave if she said no, but I figured I didn¡¯t want to dig any more of a hole with her than I needed to. Thankfully, she simply shook her head at my question, not saying anything but clearly indicating she didn¡¯t care all that much. With my query answered, I figured it wouldn¡¯t be good etiquette to just space out like I normally did, so I pulled out a book I was mildly interested in and began reading it. At that point, I was just glad that so far, it didn¡¯t seem like she was trying to pull one over on me. At worst, she simply didn¡¯t know that this was my spot. Once she saw my eyes, I doubted she would be back anyway, with my reputation.

    As lunch drew near its end, I closed my book and returned it to my bag, before standing up and walking back to my class. The rest of the day was uneventful by my standards, which meant I had to deal with the usual pranks from some of the class¡¯ more obnoxious members. And, as usual, the day ended with the same scene it normally did.

    ¡°Hey, Retter, wait up!¡± An unfortunately familiar voice called to me as I exited the classroom.

    Inwardly sighing, I turned to the culprit.

    ¡°Cap, what do you want?¡± I asked, eyes narrowed.

    As usual, my discomfort failed to get across.

    ¡°I wanted to talk for a bit. Do you have time?¡± he replied.

    I rolled my eyes. This young man was Calvin Johnson, or ¡®Cap¡¯ to his peers. For whatever reason, he had decided this year that he wanted to be my ¡®friend¡¯, after years of being the complete opposite. Of course, I wanted nothing to do with him, as my life¡¯s experience had taught me what suck-ups like him were capable of. Thankfully, I had already perfected my response to this daily question.

    ¡°Sorry, I have homework to do tonight,¡± I answered in monotone, as always.

    ¡°Oh, come on!¡± he complained, ¡°There wasn¡¯t even any math assigned tonight!¡±

    I shook my head, expecting a response like this after the once-in-a-lifetime event earlier in the day.

    ¡°I¡¯m not as smart as Judge,¡± I smoothly retort, ¡°I actually need time to complete my homework. So, if you¡¯ll excuse me, I¡¯ll be going.¡±

    With no more to say, I walked toward the entrance. It was certainly possible that Cap said something after that, but I didn¡¯t hear it. I was too busy attempting to retreat back into my own world.

    The ride home, thankfully, didn¡¯t have any similar interruptions. As always, I was greeted by my mother when I arrived home.

    ¡°How was school, Retter?¡± she immediately asked me.

    With nothing to say, I shrugged. This, of course, elicited the same sigh as always.You could be reading stolen content. Head to Royal Road for the genuine story.

    ¡°I guess I shouldn¡¯t even be surprised anymore,¡± she murmured, before switching topics, ¡°Christmas is coming up, by the way. Do you know what you want?¡±

    ¡°I want you and Dad to grow goddamn spines,¡± I say, obviously grumpy.

    While I felt a little bad after seeing the look that appeared in her eyes following the harsh request, I believed every word of what I said. While my words were definitely tough to swallow, I felt the need to repeat them as often as I realistically could, or they definitely wouldn¡¯t improve.

    At the time, I didn¡¯t realize that my life was about to change. It was simply another day, with a handful of anomalies that I didn¡¯t need to worry about in the long term. But that illusion didn¡¯t last long.

    The next day, I performed my morning routine down to the smallest detail. This included taking time to awaken, perform my usual hygienic practices, and making sure to reach the bus stop at least thirty minutes in advance. In my hometown, buses tended to arrive around ten minutes before their scheduled departure, and I learned the hard way that people like me aren¡¯t typically going to land a seat when a crowd has gathered out front.

    While my expectations were for a normal day after the minor deviations of the previous one, I was instead greeted with a second straight unusual afternoon. Right before lunch hour was supposed to begin, I got myself caught up in a class controversy by complete accident. Or, more specifically, Cap unwittingly drew me into the conversation.

    The teacher had already finished the lesson, and by this point was just allowing the minutes to count down before we could all be released for lunch. I was simply pretending to be occupied, as I often did when I had nothing to do. After all, for whatever reason, other students were less likely to pick on me when I had my nose in a book. However, at the same time, my classmates were in the middle of an intensive conversation, not bothering to quiet down enough so I wouldn¡¯t be distracted.

    ¡°You know,¡± a girl in my class droned, ¡°It¡¯s tough when your little brother hits puberty.¡±

    I recognized that voice as Alicia Alcantra, a fellow junior. I wasn¡¯t at all surprised that she was in the center of such a broad discussion. She was, unlike me, quite popular with everybody, and often attempted to hold discussions with people she wasn¡¯t familiar with in order to add them to her list of friends. While others my age saw her as mature and kind, the impression I got was that she was simply shallow. She seemed to use her large list of friends for clout, rather than actually being a good friend to anyone. It was the kind of thing that made me shudder, as a friendless individual. The mere thought of being no more than a name on her list of friends was worse than any isolation I could imagine.

    ¡°Oh? Why is that?¡± a male student replied, somewhat aggressively.

    It was obvious he had taken offense to something Alicia had said, but she didn¡¯t seem to notice.

    ¡°I don¡¯t know,¡± she tried to explain, ¡°There¡¯s something cool about having a ¡®baby brother¡¯, you know? He isn¡¯t a baby anymore, and I hate it.¡±

    ¡°I, for one,¡± another boy chipped in, ¡°Prefer my sister now that she¡¯s hit puberty.¡±

    ¡°Oh great,¡± I heard Cap reply, ¡°Everyone hit the deck! We have a siscon in the room!¡±

    A round of boisterous laughter followed, and I envisioned the student in question with quite the red face in response to Cap¡¯s joking accusation.

    ¡°I do not!¡± he retorted, clearly embarrassed, ¡°But before, she would always get up in my face and ask me to do things for her! She just kept bugging me! Now she ignores me, and I don¡¯t need to worry about ditching the house to go party with friends.¡±

    ¡°I wish he just ignored me,¡± Alicia replied, ¡°But he¡¯s gotten all defensive whenever he talks to me, too. It¡¯s as if he doesn¡¯t want me around.¡±

    ¡°Sounds like a certain classmate I know,¡± Cap murmured.

    I felt his eyes on me, and some kind of shuffling sounded from the rest of the room. I looked up to see what was going on, and saw everyone, including Cap, looking at me.

    ¡°Need something?¡± I asked evenly, holding a poker face.

    ¡°You ignoring Cap, Red-Eyes?¡± one of the students from earlier aggressively questioned.

    I look away, keeping my poker face.

    ¡°Who knows?¡± I respond, putting on an air of thoughtfulness, ¡°It¡¯s certainly possible I¡¯ve done it before, but no time comes to mind.¡±

    I look back at Cap, seeing a pained expression on his face. His friend, on the other hand, marched up to me, slammed my desk, and looked me right in the eye.

    ¡°I can¡¯t have you disrespecting my man like that, Red-Eyes,¡± he threatened, ¡°Let¡¯s take this outside, you and me.¡±

    ¡°Miles, that¡¯s enough,¡± Cap begged, ¡°Hasn¡¯t Retter suffered enough?¡±

    The boy, Miles, clicked his tongue at Cap.

    ¡°What, you¡¯re calling him by his name now?¡±

    Cap shrugged.

    ¡°He doesn¡¯t seem like a bad person,¡± he attempted to reason.

    After a moment, Miles just sighed.

    ¡°Whatever,¡± he relented, before turning to me, ¡°You got lucky. Next time, respect my friend, okay?¡±

    I didn¡¯t respond, but it was clear I was safe from his rage for now. However, I had read enough novels to know that on occasion, these were simply brief respites. I would have to be more careful moving forward. At that point, the lunch bell had already rung, and I was free to leave. As I exited the classroom, I stopped in the doorway and turned back to the students still in the room.

    ¡°If you¡¯ll excuse me,¡± I snapped, leaving the room before anyone could respond.

    With that farce behind me, I made my way to the bench I normally ate at, prepared for some peace and quiet after the ruckus. As I approached, however, something seemed out of place, and it didn¡¯t take me long to realize what it was.

    The girl from yesterday was back.

    At this point, I was already tempted to ditch my spot and find a new one, as I was certain staying around her would only cause trouble. However, before I could turn around and make my way to another secluded corner of campus, she looked up and noticed me.

    ¡°I¡¯m sorry,¡± she immediately apologized, ¡°If you want to sit down too, I don¡¯t mind.¡±

    I blinked, taking in her voice for the first time. It was soft, and somewhat melodic, reminding me of audiobooks I had read in the past for some reason. It was certainly a strange comparison to make, even for me, but for some reason it fit.

    ¡°It¡¯s alright,¡± I murmured, ¡°I¡¯m not the best around people.¡±

    A light chuckle escaped her lips, unconsciously relaxing my shoulders. I barely knew this girl, and she was already having such a strange effect on me.

    ¡°Don¡¯t worry, I won¡¯t bite,¡± she reassured me, ¡°I don¡¯t consider myself much of a social butterfly either.¡±

    Despite my better judgement, perhaps out of a sense of obligation or gratitude, I sat down next to her, and got my lunch out.

    Over the next several minutes, neither of us said a word. I was beginning to see what she was downplaying with that last sentence. She certainly seemed a tad soft-spoken, and the fact she was eating over here meant she likely didn¡¯t have any good friends at school. I didn¡¯t want to admit it, but the idea that she didn¡¯t speak to others made me secretly hopeful. It wasn¡¯t out of some strange attraction to her, to be clear, but the less interaction she had with others, the less likely she was aware of my reputation. Even if I had no plans to befriend her, it would be nice if the one other person who wanted to populate my lunch bench was someone who didn¡¯t care who I was. However, that made me curious as to why she picked this spot to begin with.

    ¡°Say,¡± I spoke up, feeling her startled response, ¡°Why did you decide to sit over here? There are many more areas on campus that would make better seats.¡±

    After a moment to calm down, she began to explain.

    ¡°You seem pretty quiet.¡±

    ¡°Excuse me?¡±

    ¡°I don¡¯t like loud noise,¡± she elaborated, ¡°If I come over here, there isn¡¯t much in the way of ambient noise, and you don¡¯t seem like someone who would talk too much to me.¡±

    ¡°Would you prefer I didn¡¯t?¡± I clarified.

    She shook her head in response.

    ¡°It¡¯s not that I mind if we talk for a bit, here and there,¡± she explained, ¡°But you¡¯re not going to talk my ear off for the entire lunch session.¡±

    ¡°Damn right,¡± I murmured.

    Once again, all conversation ceased there. Strangely, I had an active desire to avoid upsetting her too much by talking, even though I didn¡¯t really have any reason for it.

    It wasn¡¯t until a few minutes before the end of the lunch period that she continued our conversation from earlier.

    ¡°I don¡¯t think we¡¯ve been introduced yet,¡± she brought up.

    She turned to me and looked me directly in the eyes, before sticking out her hand.

    ¡°I¡¯m Iris Etheran.¡±

    Eyebrows raised slightly in surprise, I took her hand.

    ¡°Retter Hanson,¡± I said in kind.

    After a quick shake, we let go and began to pack our bags.

    ¡°Do you mind if I come back tomorrow?¡± she asked me.

    ¡°No, not particularly,¡± I responded without thinking, ¡°But aren¡¯t you scared of me?¡±

    She tilted her head in confusion.

    ¡°Why would I be?¡±

    I didn¡¯t say anything, but pointed at my eyes. When she looked at them, I became extremely aware of how nice her eyes looked. In contrast to the scarlet I was born with, she was endowed with a soft blue that betrayed her shy nature. They were unlike any I had ever seen.

    ¡°Don¡¯t worry,¡± she reassured me, ¡°They¡¯re definitely unusual, but you don¡¯t seem like a bad person.¡±

    I felt a needle in my chest at those words. I had heard that phrase spoken almost verbatim by Cap earlier. However, unlike Cap, I immediately trusted them coming from her. It could have been because of my past with Cap, or simply that a pretty girl was the one telling me, but I had no reason to doubt her.

    ¡°I guess I¡¯ll see you tomorrow then,¡± I commented, beginning to depart.

    She nodded, also ready to head to her class. As I walked back, I began to wonder why I had opened up so much to her, but before that train of thought could go anywhere I had reached my classroom.

    All I knew was that it was beginning to seem like she was going to be the second person to find a place in my world.

 II - The First Step

    Sure enough, when I arrived at my usual spot for lunch the next day, a certain girl had already taken a seat, leaving a conspicuous gap next to her for me. Based on the fact that she wasn¡¯t eating yet, I assumed she was waiting for me. Taking advantage of her thoughtfulness, I took a seat.

    ¡°Good afternoon,¡± I greeted.

    Turning to me, she gave me a smile.

    ¡°Afternoon, Ret,¡± she returned the gesture.

    ¡°Ret?¡± I responded, confused.

    ¡°I¡¯m sorry, do you mind if I call you that?¡± Iris asked, ¡°I thought it sounded nice, and it¡¯s easier to say than ¡®Retter¡¯.¡±

    I shook my head. It was certainly a bit intimate for someone who¡¯s only known me a couple of days, but I honestly didn¡¯t have a problem with the name itself. In fact, in hindsight it was surprising that nobody had called me that before. After all, it seemed like a rather easy shortening of my name.

    We both took our lunches out and began to eat. While I had brought my usual prepared sandwich and crackers, I could see a slightly more varied lunch in Iris¡¯ bag. Something that especially stood out was the large concentration of green on the left side. It was quite unusual for someone our age to be so diligent about eating ¡°healthy¡± food, which made the concentration of vegetables all the more impressive.

    Of course, I had no intention of commenting on her choice of food. She had claimed yesterday that she came to this spot for some peace and quiet, and I didn¡¯t want to take that away from her. Plus, it wasn¡¯t as if I was much of a talker anyway. It was more natural for me to stay silent and simply ¡°enjoy¡± my food as much as I could. However, even if I was willing to stay silent for the entire lunch period, as was the usual, she clearly was getting rather uncomfortable by the halfway point. I wasn¡¯t sure if it was the silence or simply being in close proximity with me, but I figured it was a good idea to break my silence to figure it out.

    ¡°Is something on your mind?¡± I queried.

    She turned to me, startled by the sudden break in the silence.

    ¡°No, don¡¯t worry about it,¡± she replied, stuttering slightly.

    ¡°Are you sure?¡± I checked, ¡°You seemed uncomfortable.¡±

    She looked down.

    ¡°Well, we¡¯re friends, right? It¡¯s just, I don¡¯t know anything about you. If I¡¯m going to keep sitting with you every day, maybe it would be a good idea to get to know each other a little bit.¡±

    I blinked, then chuckled.

    ¡°What¡¯s so funny?¡± she asked.

    Not dropping my smirk, I gave my answer.

    ¡°You were the one who wanted to sit here, remember? I just happen to have been sitting here for much longer.¡±

    However, she did bring up a good point, so I decided to indulge her anyway. After all, there wasn¡¯t anything to lose by sharing a few personal details.

    ¡°Well, I¡¯m Retter Hanson,¡± I continued before she could respond, ¡°I¡¯m a junior here at Northwest Creek High School. I grew up around here, so if there¡¯s anything you need to know about Northwest Creek as a city, you can ask me. Not that I would know any good party locations, you¡¯d have to go to someone else for that.¡±

    Half expecting her to be ignoring me, I turned my head, only to see her completely focused on me.

    ¡°Was my boring introduction that interesting? I was simply rattling off things about me as fast as I could.¡±

    She nodded emphatically, a smile coming to her face.

    ¡°Sorry, did I get a bit too excited?¡± she asked, a blush forming, ¡°I just like learning about other people.¡±

    ¡°I thought you said you were quiet,¡± I responded.

    ¡°I am,¡± she confirmed, ¡°I don¡¯t like useless small talk that doesn¡¯t have any impact. But I really like hearing new things about others, because it helps me learn more about myself in the process.¡±

    ¡°What do you mean?¡±

    ¡°Well, if you asked a man who¡¯s never met a woman before what it was like to be a woman, he wouldn¡¯t think there was anything different. He would probably think all women are just like men, because he doesn¡¯t have any solid counterexamples to draw from. However, when that man meets a woman for the first time, he doesn¡¯t only think she¡¯s different from him, but also what makes him different from her. It¡¯s easy to take things for granted when you don¡¯t have anything to compare them against.¡±

    I nodded, the idea somewhat going over my head but not completely incomprehensible.

    ¡°Couldn¡¯t you get the same out of books, though? Why do you need to talk to people to understand that?¡±

    ¡°You¡¯re right, to a point,¡± she conceded, ¡°But there¡¯s a difference between reading about others, and experiencing others for yourself.¡±

    ¡°That sounds a bit dirty,¡± I commented.

    ¡°I know,¡± she said, looking forlorn, ¡°I didn¡¯t realize it until I said it.¡±

    Once again, silence fell between us. Unlike before, however, it was a more uncomfortable silence, and I began to hope she would continue talking. It had been a long time since I had been that engaged in a conversation, as short as it was, and I didn¡¯t want it to end. Eventually, I was the one who had enough of the silence.If you find this story on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the infringement.

    ¡°So you haven¡¯t told me anything about yourself,¡± I inquired.

    A pause followed, then a response.

    ¡°You¡¯re right,¡± she admitted, ¡°You know my name, but I haven¡¯t told you anything about me.¡±

    ¡°If it¡¯s difficult, don¡¯t feel pressured to say anything.¡±

    ¡°No, it¡¯s fine. It¡¯s only fair considering I asked you first,¡± she conceded.

    I turned to her, putting my full attention on her as she had on me.

    ¡°My name is Iris, as you know,¡± she began, ¡°I¡¯m also a junior here at Northwest Creek, but we only moved here for this school year. My dad grew up around here, though, so it¡¯s not completely unusual. I live with him within walking distance of campus, so it¡¯s not too painful to come here every day.¡±

    I wanted to ask about her mother, but the fact that she hadn¡¯t been brought up in the conversation indicated it might be a sour spot.

    ¡°Are you an only child?¡± I asked.

    She nodded.

    ¡°My mother passed away when I was young, so I didn¡¯t get the chance to have many siblings. Plus, Dad never remarried, so it was just us for a while.¡±

    I cringed, realizing my clumsy failure to remain tactful.

    ¡°It seems like you¡¯ve had a tough life,¡± I reasoned.

    Iris put her hands behind her head, and relaxed her shoulders.

    ¡°I guess,¡± she agreed, ¡°But I¡¯ve never thought of it that way.¡±

    I tilted my head, ready to ask what she meant, but she stood up before I had a chance to ask.

    ¡°It seems like we¡¯re almost out of time,¡± Iris said, ¡°We should head to class.¡±

    I nodded, gathering my supplies and putting my backpack on. It was a bit disappointing that we didn¡¯t get to finish the conversation we were having, but I needed to focus on class for the time being.

    Thankfully, class managed to flow by rather smoothly. Nobody decided to pick a fight with me today, and considering my plans for the afternoon, I could not have been more grateful for that.

    Once class was over, I exited the classroom before Cap could catch up to me and made my way directly toward the faculty offices. Of course, with how familiar I had become with this area of the building, I didn¡¯t need to check the nameplates to find the office I was looking for. Upon reaching the door marked, ¡®Mr. Samuel MacArthur¡¯, I knocked and waited for a moment. Normally, I came here a couple of times a week, but circumstances had made it impossible for me to visit since the end of September, and considering it was almost two weeks into October, this was a visit I desperately needed.

    ¡°Come on in!¡± I heard a muffled voice permeate the door.

    Figuring there was no reason to wait, I immediately stepped in. I was greeted with the face of the school¡¯s European History professor, Samuel MacArthur.

    ¡°Welcome back, Retter,¡± Mr. MacArthur opened, ¡°It¡¯s been quite a while since I¡¯ve seen you. How are you doing?¡±

    With how long I¡¯d known this man, I figured honesty was the best policy here.

    ¡°It¡¯s been up and down since the last time we¡¯ve talked,¡± I admitted, ¡°I don¡¯t think today was too bad, though.¡±

    ¡°I¡¯m glad to hear it,¡± he replied.

    ¡°Is Gibson feeling better?¡± I inquired, ¡°He must have been feeling pretty bad if you had to take two weeks off to help him.¡±

    ¡°He¡¯s much better, thanks for asking,¡± he replied, ¡°Thankfully, it was just a stubborn fever, but with my wife out of town, I couldn¡¯t spare a day away from home.¡±

    ¡°That¡¯s right,¡± I remembered, ¡°Your wife¡¯s a business executive, right?¡±

    ¡°She¡¯s at a conference in Europe right now, and that left me stuck at home with little Gibby. Retter, if you ever have children, remember to appreciate every moment you have with them when they¡¯re healthy. It makes it much easier to help them when they¡¯re sick.¡±

    ¡°I¡¯m not sure I understand,¡± I responded, not making eye contact.

    ¡°I don¡¯t expect you to yet,¡± Mr. MacArthur laughed, ¡°But one day, you¡¯ll figure out what I mean. If lunch is any indication, you may very well be on your way there.¡±

    ¡°What do you mean?¡±

    Mr. MacArthur gave me a smug grin.

    ¡°Do you think I didn¡¯t see you sitting with Iris during lunch? I must say, she does seem like your type.¡±

    I raised my eyebrows.

    ¡°Mr. MacArthur, you know Iris?¡±

    He nodded, a gleam in his eye.

    ¡°She¡¯s in my morning class. Quite an intelligent young lady, consistently scoring in the top ten in the class on exams.¡±

    ¡°I thought Iris was a junior,¡± I clarified, ¡°You mostly teach sophomores.¡±

    ¡°I¡¯m teaching an elective class on Medieval architecture this term,¡± he explained, ¡°She¡¯s in that class.¡±

    That made a lot more sense. Mr. MacArthur always had a soft spot for artwork, and in his eyes architecture was likely just another form of art that could be explained in a historical context.

    ¡°Smooth,¡± I muttered to myself.

    ¡°Did you say something?¡± he was prompted to ask.

    I shook my head.

    ¡°Just impressed that you twisted your love of art into a class that you can teach at work. You¡¯re as sly as ever.¡±

    ¡°I¡¯ll have you know, Retter, that studying architecture is a valuable part of understanding all of history, in times of both war and peace. Even if it can be beautiful at times.¡±

    I laughed, but he was right. In my time studying history, I had always paid attention to how everyday, innocuous details affected more conspicuous events. Whatever ulterior motives he may have had, the pitch likely didn¡¯t take too long to get approved by the administration.

    ¡°You know, Retter?¡± his voice snapped me out of my thoughts.

    ¡°What¡¯s up?¡±

    Mr. MacArthur was grinning.

    ¡°You seem a bit more relaxed than usual,¡± he commented, ¡°It¡¯s a little unnerving to see you not all tightened up.¡±

    ¡°That¡¯s just because I¡¯m talking to you,¡± I retorted, ¡°You know I¡¯m a lot more comfortable around you than anyone else.¡±

    ¡°That¡¯s not what I mean,¡± he clarified, ¡°Even though you definitely talk more when you¡¯re with me, you still have an air of tension around you that doesn¡¯t let up. That air isn¡¯t quite as thick as it normally is.¡±

    ¡°How can you tell?¡±

    ¡°I can¡¯t put it into words. It¡¯s just a feeling,¡± he struggled to explain.

    I didn¡¯t really see where he was coming from. From my perspective, today felt like any other day in my life. I contemplated the possibility that he was simply seeing things, but I didn¡¯t want to make that assumption without evidence. In addition, Mr. MacArthur had always been quite perceptive where I was involved, so it wasn¡¯t possible to take what he was saying off the table, even if I personally doubted his conclusions.

    ¡°I¡¯ll think about that,¡± I replied halfheartedly, ¡°I don¡¯t feel any different, but maybe you¡¯re onto something.¡±

    With that said, I stood up, ready to go.

    ¡°Thank you, as always,¡± I stated, nodding.

    He stood up as well, noticing my intent to leave.

    ¡°Of course, Retter,¡± he returned, ¡°If you ever need anything at all, please let me know.¡±

    ¡°Say hi to Gibson for me,¡± I called as I closed the door behind me.

    With that complete, I began walking toward the exit, ready to return home for the day. However, I ran into an unfortunate surprise on my way out.

    ¡°Hey, Retter!¡±

    I inwardly flinched, turning to the source of the voice. As expected, it was Cap again.

    ¡°Cap, I¡¯m sorry to disappoint you, but I¡¯m busy again today.¡±

    He rolled his eyes.

    ¡°That¡¯s what you always say. Can¡¯t you hear me out?¡±

    I sigh. This was the last thing I wanted to deal with, and somehow I knew this wouldn¡¯t end quite as easily as it usually did.

    ¡°I know you want to talk about before, but I¡¯d rather not. It¡¯s painful for me to think about it,¡± I pleaded, ¡°I think we should just remain strangers.¡±

    ¡°Retter, why?¡± he asked in earnest, ¡°Please give me a chance. I don¡¯t mean to hurt you.¡±

    ¡°That¡¯s what makes this different?¡± I responded sharply, then backtracked, ¡°I¡¯m sorry. But please see this from my point of view, Cap.¡±

    Without waiting for his response, I walked away. He was an individual I really didn¡¯t want anything to do with. To get my mind off it, I decided that I would spend the rest of today preparing for my next conversation with Iris. After all, there wasn¡¯t much else in my life to look forward to anymore.

 III - A Shift in Context

    Around two weeks passed after my conversation with Cap. In a rare turn of events, the time period was somewhat tolerable, and compared to the two weeks preceding them, even enjoyable.

    Firstly, for once Cap kept his distance. I wasn¡¯t certain the reasoning, but the confrontation was the last time we had spoken at all, save for greetings or for class groups. In the latter case, neither of us really said anything unless it was necessary. This was a double-edged sword, but one I was happy to wield for now.

    In addition, I kept up my meetings with Mr. MacArthur, the same as I had been before his short ¡®vacation¡¯. While I was expecting him to forget that he had thought I was more relaxed, according to him it was a consistent change. He also commented that my eyes were slightly less ¡®dead¡¯ than before, though part of me wondered if it was the placebo effect working its magic on my red eyes.

    Finally, my lunch visits with Iris had continued each day of the stretch. In fact, I found myself longing for them when I wasn¡¯t at school, despite never really caring before whether or not I sat alone at lunch. While at first there wasn¡¯t much in the way of conversation, by this point it wasn¡¯t unusual for us to hold a single conversation through the entirety of lunch.

    However, this brief period of consistent peace couldn¡¯t last forever. The world was too unkind to leave any person be for too long. Of course, I understood this, but for some reason I was beginning to hope that it would never end.

    It started on the morning of October 29<sup>th</sup>. At first, it didn¡¯t seem like anything would be any different compared to the last two weeks. Once again, Cap was mostly keeping his distance, and people weren¡¯t harassing me too much. However, after taking a seat for third period, which was math class, I received an unexpected visitor at my desk.

    ¡°Hey, Red-Eyes. I need to talk to you.¡±

    I looked up, into the eyes of Judge Adams, the smartest student in the grade.

    ¡°How unusual. You normally wouldn¡¯t bother yourself with someone like me,¡± I commented.

    His eyes narrowed, but he didn¡¯t comment on my snarky response. Instead, he moved on.

    ¡°Is it true that you¡¯re the reason Cap¡¯s been depressed recently?¡±

    I looked over to Cap, who looked completely normal from my perspective.

    ¡°Has he been? Seems fine to me,¡± I observed.

    ¡°You haven¡¯t had to deal with him during class, have you?¡± Judge asked.

    ¡°I have, once or twice. What of it?¡±

    Judge sighed in exasperation.

    ¡°Look, Red-Eyes, he¡¯s been absolutely out of it. It¡¯s been hurting my grade to work with him, and unlike you I have to do so on a regular basis.¡±

    ¡°Is he your lab partner or something?¡±

    Judge nodded.

    ¡°Yeah, and I can¡¯t have my reputation sullied by his weakness. If this is your fault, I need you to fix it.¡±

    I shrugged.

    ¡°I can¡¯t even be sure it¡¯s my fault,¡± I replied, ¡°So I can¡¯t help you.¡±

    Judge audibly groaned at this, drawing eyeballs from around the room.

    ¡°God, do you think about anyone other than yourself, Red-Eyes?¡± he almost shouted at me.

    ¡°Do you?¡± I held my glare.

    Judge closed his eyes. Perhaps realizing that he couldn¡¯t beat me in a fight, he backed off, though by the time he reached his desk his clenched fist was obviously visible. I had the feeling what I said had gotten to him on a deeper level than I had intended, though with his attitude I still felt no regrets.

    I looked down at my desk, thinking about what Judge had said. Even though I had no intention of showing him, what had happened with Cap was beginning to bother me just a little bit. I wasn¡¯t sure if it was just a coincidence, but his decline in attitude definitely mirrored the time I told him to back off. While I definitely wasn¡¯t trying to be nice to people, I didn¡¯t consider myself a bad person, and it did bother me when I needlessly hurt people.

    While I didn¡¯t think anyone in class recognized my internal turmoil, it became clear there would be no hiding it from Iris, who I once again decided to sit with at lunch.

    ¡°Is something on your mind?¡± she asked me as I sat down.

    I shook my head.

    ¡°Not really, why do you ask?¡±

    Iris sighed heavily.

    ¡°You don¡¯t need to lie to me,¡± she reassured, ¡°It¡¯s written all over your face.¡±

    After a brief thought, I decided to fill her in.

    ¡°I¡¯m not sure, but it¡¯s possible I¡¯ve hurt someone quite deeply,¡± I explain, ¡°And I¡¯m not sure if I was justified or not.¡±

    ¡°What do you mean?¡± she immediately asked.

    ¡°There¡¯s this kid in a lot of my classes, his name¡¯s Cap. We¡¯ve known each other for years, but we¡¯ve never been on particularly good terms. He was one of my biggest bullies growing up, never missing the chance to make an example of me because of my eye color.¡±

    ¡°Why did he do that?¡± she inquired.

    ¡°I don¡¯t know, but we never really liked each other,¡± I answered, ¡°But, all of a sudden, this year he¡¯s been acting like he wants to be my friend.¡±

    ¡°Did he have a change of heart?¡±

    I shrugged.

    ¡°I don¡¯t want to give him the chance to take advantage of me, like he has so many times in the past. So I¡¯ve consistently turned him down. But until a few weeks ago, he continuously asked. So, about two weeks ago, I told him to his face that I didn¡¯t want to talk about what happened, and blew him off. Apparently he¡¯s been depressed ever since.¡±

    A short pause followed.

    ¡°Are you sure it was your fault?¡± Iris contemplated, ¡°It¡¯s possible this is a coincidence.¡±

    ¡°I considered that,¡± I conceded, ¡°But I don¡¯t think so. It makes a bit too much sense, and it lines up a little too well.¡±

    ¡°Why don¡¯t you ask him?¡± she asked.

    ¡°I¡¯ve already decided I want nothing to do with him,¡± I declined, ¡°There¡¯s no reason for me to ask him now.¡±

    ¡°Isn¡¯t it going to keep bugging you if you don¡¯t make up with him?¡± Iris challenged, ¡°Are you really sure you don¡¯t want him as a friend?¡±

    This made me stop for a moment. I had never even considered the possibility of being friends with Cap, considering our past. However, I couldn¡¯t deny that having Iris around had changed my mentality to some extent, and my view of friendship had definitely grown a little more favorable. Still, I didn¡¯t think I was ready to seriously consider the idea.

    ¡°Honestly, I¡¯m not sure whether it would happen in an ideal world,¡± I said, ¡°But I think we¡¯re too far past the point of no return. I¡¯m not in any rush to make it happen.¡±

    ¡°If you say so,¡± Iris commented, though her response was unusually distant.

    ¡°Is something wrong?¡± I asked.

    ¡°Nothing. Sorry.¡±Stolen content warning: this content belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences.

    After this discussion, we began to eat our food. We didn¡¯t say much more the rest of the lunch hour, both lost in our own heads for the entirety of it. I wasn¡¯t sure what was going on in her head, but I was just trying to distract myself. However, it didn¡¯t work, and by the time lunch ended, I was stuck thinking about the Cap situation again.

    ¡°Maybe I¡¯ll ask Mr. MacArthur for advice,¡± I murmured, hoping Iris didn¡¯t hear me.

    Of course, I didn¡¯t get the chance until the end of the day, and by that point I had forgotten a lot of what I spoke about with Iris. Still, I was grateful that Mr. MacArthur was willing to hear me out on what I did remember.

    ¡°So, you¡¯re wondering if you should forgive Cap for what he did to you in the past, right?¡± he clarified.

    I nodded.

    ¡°It¡¯s not that I intended to, but I think the way I rejected him last time left him a bit unsettled. Judge says he hasn¡¯t been the same way since, and even I was able to notice it from time to time.¡±

    ¡°I¡¯ve seen it a little too,¡± Mr. MacArthur noted, ¡°So, that was your doing?¡±

    ¡°I¡¯m not completely sure, but it¡¯s very possible.¡±

    Mr. MacArthur took a few moments to think, before answering me with a question.

    ¡°Have you given him a chance?¡±

    ¡°Not really, no,¡± I slowly responded, ¡°By the time I was old enough to consider it, he had already buried my reputation six feet under.¡±

    ¡°Well,¡± he stroked his chin, ¡°I¡¯m not sure how to help you focus on other things, but maybe you should consider giving him a chance for once. From my perspective, Cap has matured a lot since he started high school. Based on what you¡¯re telling me, I wouldn¡¯t be surprised if his advances were completely genuine.¡±

    I thought about it, but I couldn¡¯t see it.

    ¡°In any case,¡± he moved on, ¡°Don¡¯t lose sleep over it. You¡¯re in a critical part of your life, and social issues come and go as fast as lightning. It will resolve itself to some extent if you give it time.¡±

    I nodded, and stood up. I was grateful for his advice, but I didn¡¯t see much to apply in it. I didn¡¯t really want to give a chance to someone who had, among other things, tried to force me to wear glasses with blue rings in them to disguise my eye color, then laughing at me when I refused to do it.

    While I didn¡¯t intend to involve my parents in it, my father was too quick to notice my discomfort during dinner.

    ¡°Retter, what¡¯s the matter?¡± he asked while I was taking a bite of food.

    Swallowing, I turned to him.

    ¡°Nothing in particular. Just got in a little argument at school that¡¯s been bugging me.¡±

    ¡°What do you mean?¡± my mother chimed in.

    Looking at both of my parents, I could tell they expected answers, so I explained the situation. At the end, both were somewhat surprised.

    ¡°Are you sure he¡¯s upset at you?¡± my father asked, ¡°He must understand what he did to you for all those years.¡±

    ¡°Who else would he be upset with?¡± I looked him in the eye.

    He held my gaze.

    ¡°Himself, of course,¡± he stated, as if it were fact.

    ¡°What do you mean?¡± I questioned.

    ¡°There¡¯s no way that a young man like that one would get mad at you for two weeks straight,¡± he explained, ¡°If anything, maybe he¡¯s over it in a few days. It makes much more sense to me that what you said to him hits close to home, and he doesn¡¯t know what to do with himself now that you¡¯ve said it to his face.¡±

    I considered what my father was saying. I understood the feeling that he was talking about. For many years, I had put up with bullying, and never fought back, because I didn¡¯t think I was strong enough to fight back, or I thought I didn¡¯t deserve to be free because of my eye color. I had bouts of depression that lasted weeks, and it was all aimed at myself. From that perspective, I understood what he meant, but Cap wasn¡¯t me. He lived a good life, and was the powerful one in the relationship. There was no reason for him to hate himself.

    When dinner was finished, I paused on my way up the stairs.

    ¡°Dad,¡± I murmured, ¡°Thanks for the talk.¡±

    His eyebrows raised upon hearing my gratitude.

    ¡°Of course, Retter,¡± he gently responded, ¡°Any time.¡±

    I turned my head enough to look him in the eye, not letting my poker face fall. However, I think he got the message that my gratitude was genuine.

    The following day, I was beginning to feel a little better. When I got out of bed in the morning, I felt considerably more relaxed than I had the previous few days, and Cap was the last thing on my mind. I wasn¡¯t sure why, but it felt like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders the previous day. Unfortunately, the peace I felt wasn¡¯t destined to last long.

    On my way to lunch, I noticed something was off. While it wasn¡¯t unusual for Iris to be there before me, she was sitting on the ground rather than the bench. In addition, she had placed her backpack in the spot on the bench where she normally sat. When I arrived, I made sure to ask her about it.

    ¡°Oh, that?¡± she asked, referring to the backpack, ¡°I¡¯m expecting someone else to join us today. Figured I¡¯d save him a seat.¡±

    ¡°Him?¡± I repeated, ¡°I didn¡¯t know you knew many other guys.¡±

    She looked away, wearing an embarrassed blush.

    ¡°Well, I don¡¯t,¡± she admitted, ¡°I just met him yesterday.¡±

    ¡°And you already invited him to lunch?¡± I replied, impressed, ¡°Bold of you.¡±

    We sat for about ten minutes, waiting for our guest to show up, but by that point he was still missing in action. I considered the possibility that he stood her up, or simply missed school that day, but without any confirmation I wasn¡¯t willing to start eating without him.

    ¡°Are you sure he¡¯s coming?¡± I clarify.

    ¡°He should be,¡± Iris replied slowly, ¡°He doesn¡¯t seem like the type to miss appointments.¡±

    ¡°Hey! Sorry to keep you guys waiting!¡± a voice rang out through the courtyard.

    Iris looked up, ready to greet the oncoming visitor. However, I froze upon hearing the voice. It was a voice I knew very well, and one I was not at all happy to hear.

    ¡°Cap, it¡¯s good to see you again,¡± Iris greeted, standing, ¡°What kept you?¡±

    ¡°Sorry, I got held up by some friends in the classroom,¡± he apologized, ¡°It happens every now and again. Also needed to make sure Miles didn¡¯t follow me here, he doesn¡¯t exactly like your friend over there.¡±

    I felt Iris¡¯ eyes on me, prompting me to look up and face Cap for the first time in weeks.

    ¡°What¡¯s going on?¡± I question bleakly, ¡°Since when did you two know each other?¡±

    ¡°I told you, we met yesterday,¡± Iris explained, ¡°I talked to him for a bit, and figured it would be nice to invite him to lunch. Especially considering what you told me.¡±

    ¡°I thought I told you, I¡¯m not in any rush,¡± I muttered, hoping Cap didn¡¯t hear me.

    ¡°Please, Ret,¡± she pleaded with me, ¡°You told me yesterday that it was possible you wouldn¡¯t mind being friends with him.¡±

    ¡°I wasn¡¯t exactly definitive about it,¡± I kept my voice low, ¡°And things are awkward.¡±

    ¡°Then let¡¯s fix it.¡±

    After that, we both went quiet for a moment. I saw what she was trying to do, and I wasn¡¯t exactly happy that she went behind my back to set up this meeting. It was safe to assume she thought I¡¯d bail if I knew, but now that I was in this position it was difficult to compose any response, not just a negative one.

    ¡°Am I interrupting something?¡± Cap asked, confused, ¡°I can leave if it¡¯s easier.¡±

    Iris immediately turned to him to keep him from leaving, waving her hands wildly.

    ¡°No, no, of course not!¡± she exclaimed, ¡°It¡¯s just that I know things have been tense between you two lately, and I thought this might be a good time to start patching things up.¡±

    Cap, seeing where she was taking this, looked right at me. This, of course, prompted me to drop eye contact almost immediately.

    ¡°Ret, I know you don¡¯t want to hear it, but I really want to clear the air,¡± he explained, ¡°You seem like a good person, even though you¡¯ve gone through as much as you have, and I feel really bad about the person I used to be to you.¡±

    I still didn¡¯t respond. While I was still able to hear what Cap was saying, my thoughts were mostly occupied with something different altogether. At this point, all I could hear were the words my dad had given me the night before. If my dad was right, he was upset with himself for what I said, because I was completely correct.

    According to Mr. MacArthur, Cap had matured a lot since high school began. Iris was able to approach him without too much trouble, and convince him to start avoiding me. And, of course, he had become the first person my age to ever approach me with the outward intention of being my friend. Even I couldn¡¯t deny that all the signs pointed to a different Cap than the one I had grown up with. However, there was still something bugging me.

    ¡°Cap, I need to ask. Why did you stop?¡±

    ¡°What?¡± Cap responded, confused.

    ¡°For the first month and a half of the school year you approached me almost every day after school. Then, after our last conversation, you abruptly stopped. Why?¡±

    Cap went silent for a moment, looking into the sky. After a minute, he finally responded.

    ¡°I did what you asked. You told me to look at it from your perspective. So I did. I pretended to be you in my own head, and saw me trying to take advantage of you. So I figured you had a point, and left you alone.¡±

    Nobody said anything for almost five minutes. It was clear that we all had things going on in our head that we didn¡¯t want to talk about, and so nobody broke the silence.

    As for myself, I had to internally debate the idea of Cap joining us for lunch on occasion. I imagined that, if I allowed it, he would return, meaning it was up to me right now to decide whether or not Cap deserved to sit with Iris and myself. I wasn¡¯t sure if I could trust him, after all he¡¯d done to me. While the adults and Iris appear to vouch for him, it could have been the elaborate scheme of a manipulative student. It certainly wouldn¡¯t have been the first time I¡¯d fallen into that trap.

    However, if he was genuine in his desire to be my friend, was it a good idea to pass up on the opportunity? In the span of two weeks, Iris had gone from a transfer student I¡¯d never seen before to the only friend I¡¯d ever had among my peers. Of course, that was because I could tell she was a good person who didn¡¯t care about my eye color. Would it be safe to extend that same benefit of the doubt to Cap, someone who had led the mockery of my eyes for years?

    I was lost in this particular thought loop for several minutes, but something Iris had told me once popped up in my head.

    She led a tough life, but never saw it that way.

    I never remembered to ask her what she meant, but I was still curious about it. If I ditched Cap here, there was the possibility that I would lose Iris, or she would grow more distant after seeing that side of me. The hardships she had gone through in her life were definitely real, but she didn¡¯t cave to them. Who was I to cave to my own cowardice here?

    ¡°Cap, I still don¡¯t really trust you,¡± I admitted to his face, ¡°But if you want to eat with us, I won¡¯t stop you. I guess I can give you that much of a chance, if you want.¡±

    Cap¡¯s face brightened, and while it could have been my imagination, the world around him lit up as well.

    ¡°Of course, Ret! I¡¯ll be here every day for lunch! I¡¯ll prove to you that I¡¯m a changed man, and someone you can count on!¡±

    ¡°Don¡¯t push your luck,¡± I warned, ¡°And why did you start calling me ¡®Ret¡¯?¡±

    Cap laughed.

    ¡°I heard Iris calling you that, and I liked it. So I¡¯m going to use it.¡±

    At this point, I was exhausted, and thus didn¡¯t have the willpower to tell him not to. It didn¡¯t seem like it would be too much hassle to put up with him for now anyway.

    ¡°Ret,¡± I heard Iris whisper to me, ¡°I¡¯ll make sure you won¡¯t regret this.¡±

    Even at the low volume she spoke, I could hear the smile on her face.

 IV - Consequences and Considerations

    With Cap officially having joined our group, the lunch dynamic began to change quite dramatically. What previously often consisted of a quiet corner to eat and discuss whatever was on our minds turned into an awkward triangle of Iris having a conversation with one of us, and the other pitching in on occasion.

    On one particular day in early November, Iris was helping Cap with a particularly troublesome math problem. In all honesty, I didn¡¯t know what I was doing on it either, but I wasn¡¯t inclined to join the discussion.

    ¡°So the ¡®x¡¯ goes here on the bottom,¡± Cap clarified, ¡°And not on the top?¡±

    Iris nodded.

    ¡°That¡¯s correct,¡± Iris confirmed, ¡°It¡¯s smarter to have your ¡®x¡¯ variable in the denominator for this problem, as it lines up better with the formula you¡¯re going to be using later.¡±

    ¡°I am so lost,¡± Cap muttered to himself, ¡°Hey, Ret, do you know what¡¯s going on here?¡±

    ¡°Not particularly,¡± I responded absentmindedly, not paying much attention.

    ¡°You¡¯re having trouble, too?¡± Iris asked me, ¡°Why don¡¯t you come join us?¡±

    I shook my head emphatically.

    ¡°Don¡¯t worry about it,¡± I reassured them, ¡°It will give me something to do when I go home.¡±

    ¡°Nonsense,¡± Iris turned down my declination, ¡°Come here.¡±

    Seeing no option for escape, I sat down next to Cap on the ground and looked at his math book. While I was a better student than he was, this particular material was beyond me. Math was never my strongest subject, with social sciences being more up my alley.

    Thankfully, Iris was much more educated in the realm of mathematics compared to me, and despite joining in late I was understanding the material much faster than Cap, who was still confused by the time lunch ended.

    ¡°You two still aren¡¯t talking much, huh?¡± Iris commented as we began packing.

    I shook my head.

    ¡°Just because I¡¯m letting him sit with me doesn¡¯t mean I¡¯m comfortable around him. And I think he has the same doubts I do.¡±

    ¡°Are you sure?¡±

    I didn¡¯t answer. In all honesty, there was a part of me wondering whether I was simply projecting myself onto Cap in some way that made me think he was as irritated as I was. Of course, that was just a nagging thought, as Cap hadn¡¯t made much effort to talk to me at lunch either.

    ¡°Iris,¡± I called after her as she started to gain on me, ¡°There¡¯s something I wanted to ask you about.¡±

    She turned around, curious.

    ¡°What was it?¡± She replied.

    ¡°We probably can¡¯t talk about it now,¡± I admit after a quick realization, ¡°But remind me tomorrow, and I¡¯ll ask then.¡±

    Still confused, she nodded before heading off to her class.

    After school, I figured it was worth paying a visit to Mr. MacArthur¡¯s office to update him on the newest developments. I had only visited once since Cap started eating with us, and it was only a day or two after the decision was made.

    Reaching the door, I knocked on it several times, expecting a response from the other side. However, it was silent. I attempted to open the door, but it was locked. This set off alarm bells in my head, as Mr. MacArthur was almost always in his office by this time, and the times he wasn¡¯t were usually his days off, meaning the door would have an ¡°Out for the day¡± sign hanging on it. However, the sign was nowhere to be found.

    Just then, I heard a familiar voice coming down the hall.

    ¡°Yes, yes, I told you I¡¯d have it for you in a few days,¡± the voice said, ¡°I¡¯m sorry, but my son got sick for a few weeks, and I had to spend a bit of the money I had initially put aside for you, and¡­¡±

    The voice, which I identified as Mr. MacArthur, was continuing to ramble into his phone. I decided not to interject, but as I was preparing to leave he noticed me, and beckoned me into his office with him.

    By the time we both sat down, he had concluded his phone call, and was smiling at me apologetically.

    ¡°I apologize for any trouble,¡± he stated immediately, ¡°Some personal matters came up that I had to deal with.¡±

    I shook my head quickly.

    ¡°Not at all,¡± I reassure him, ¡°You¡¯re not obligated to be in your office whenever I need you. If anything, you¡¯ve done me a service just by being here as often as you are.¡±

    ¡°Nonsense,¡± Mr. MacArthur shook his head, ¡°The job of a teacher is to help their students learn and grow, and part of that is being there when they need us.¡±

    ¡°I suppose,¡± I mumbled, failing to make eye contact.

    We sat in silence for a moment, before I took the initiative to explain recent events.

    ¡°I¡¯m glad to hear you¡¯re doing well in math,¡± he praised, ¡°Iris is such a smart girl, I¡¯m not surprised she was able to help you with your struggles.¡±

    I nod, a slight grin adorning my face.

    ¡°She is,¡± I agreed, ¡°And what of my situation with Cap?¡±

    ¡°Well,¡± he started, ¡°It seems you two have reached a kind of stalemate. Neither of you wants to break the ice, which is keeping you both sane but simultaneously making it impossible to get any closer.¡±

    ¡°I don¡¯t really trust him,¡± I confessed, ¡°So I¡¯ll let him do it.¡±

    ¡°Isn¡¯t that just putting off the inevitable, though?¡± he challenged, ¡°Maybe you should be the one to offer an olive branch. It would make things much easier.¡±

    ¡°I still don¡¯t think I can.¡±

    ¡°Well, the good news is that you still have time. Think it over for a little while, and talk over your thoughts with me next time you come here.¡±

    I nodded, thanked him for his time, and departed swiftly. There was a lot on my mind, and I couldn¡¯t think of a better place to mull it all over than my own bed at home. However, peace was the last thing that I would know the rest of that afternoon.Reading on this site? This novel is published elsewhere. Support the author by seeking out the original.

    As I turned the corner to walk to the nearby bus stop, a hand roughly grabbed my shoulder. The unexpected force of the hand caused me to fall over, my back landing against the cement brick wall separating the sidewalk from one of the nearby houses.

    I looked up to see who the offender was. Standing above me, clearly angry, was Cap¡¯s friend Miles. It took a moment for the face to register in my head due to the initial pain in my back, but when everything came together it occurred to me exactly what had happened.

    He had pushed me down, intentionally.

    ¡°Listen, Red-Eyes,¡± he scowled at me, ¡°I know you¡¯ve been spending more time with my boy Cap. Don¡¯t even try to deny it.¡±

    I held my hands up in defeat, attempting to avoid any more unnecessary pain.

    ¡°Guilty as charged, I suppose,¡± I admit, ¡°Though we barely talk to each other.¡±

    ¡°Is that so?¡± he prodded, ¡°That makes it even worse, then. He¡¯s been abandoning the rest of us to pander to a social reject like you. Not sure what he sees in you, to be honest. You just seem like an ass to me.¡±

    ¡°We all have one,¡± I replied halfheartedly.

    ¡°Not my point,¡± he snarled, stomping, ¡°Stay away from him. We don¡¯t need you sullying his reputation, or ours.¡±

    ¡°Hey, if you can convince him to leave me alone, I won¡¯t complain,¡± I said, ¡°But he¡¯s coming by of his own free will. Not sure what I¡¯m supposed to do about that.¡±

    Miles glared at me for a moment longer, then walked away. Realizing I was safe, I stood up and brushed myself off.

    ¡°What¡¯s his problem?¡± I muttered to myself, irritated.

    Needless to say, I was not in a good mood when I arrived home, and seeing my parents did not help one bit.

    ¡°What¡¯s wrong, Retter?¡± my mother immediately questioned me upon my entry.

    ¡°What do you mean?¡± I responded in my depressed state.

    ¡°Sit down,¡± she beckoned.

    I obliged, taking a seat at the dinner table.

    ¡°Now please explain what¡¯s going on,¡± she requested.

    I took a deep breath. I didn¡¯t particularly want to tell my mother what was going on. After all, past experience had taught me that my parents would often shrug in response to any trouble I had at school, and they would often just end it with a ¡°hang in there¡± or something of the sort. However, I also recognized that it would be much less troublesome to be up front with it now and just deal with the ramifications of it after the fact.

    ¡°I kinda got assaulted by one of the other students on the way home,¡± I disclosed quietly.

    My mother gasped, not realizing how normal this was for me.

    ¡°What do you mean?¡±

    ¡°A friend of a¡­of someone I know¡± I corrected myself, ¡°was angry that his friend was associating with me. Worried about their reputation or something.¡±

    ¡°Is there anything we can do to help?¡± My mother asked, ¡°This is not okay.¡±

    I nodded.

    ¡°If you would back up my story, we can take this to the school¡¯s administration. It¡¯s possible that he would be disciplined if my parents could confirm the story.¡±

    A short silence followed.

    ¡°Retter, I¡¯d be happy to, but I wasn¡¯t there to see it. Our witness testimony wouldn¡¯t mean anything.¡±

    ¡°Of course it would!¡± I suddenly begin shouting, ¡°You two know better than anyone when I¡¯m lying! Even if you didn¡¯t see it-¡°

    She shook her head.

    ¡°Claims of bullying are taken very seriously at your school, but innocent until proven guilty is the standard for a reason. I can¡¯t have you disciplined by the school for something that you¡¯re not to blame for.¡±

    ¡°What would they blame me for?¡± I asked.

    ¡°Maybe they would consider you as bullying that other student,¡± she said, ¡°Your eyes don¡¯t help your case here.¡±

    ¡°Of course it¡¯s my damn eyes,¡± I mutter.

    ¡°Language, Retter.¡±

    ¡°You think I care?!¡± I shout at her, ¡°You two are cowards, the both of you! Do you know how long I¡¯ve had to deal with this? Longer than you even know! And you two won¡¯t back me up on it!¡±

    ¡°Retter,¡± she pleaded, but I wasn¡¯t listening.

    Instead, I decided that enough was enough. I marched straight up the stairs as fast as I could, not wanting to see my mother¡¯s face anymore. I wasn¡¯t thinking remotely straight, and I yelled the first thing that came to mind. Of course, she was probably right, and it would do more harm than good to take this to the school, but it didn¡¯t matter.

    Once again, she had abandoned me. She left me to the wolves, just like she always had.

    I wasn¡¯t feeling much better the next day, either. The argument we¡¯d had the previous night was still weighing on me when I went to class in the morning, meaning I was even more standoffish and irritable than I usually was. On the plus side, Miles didn¡¯t try to pick a fight with me during the day.

    When I sat down for lunch, Iris once again noticed my internal conflict, and felt it necessary to ask about it.

    ¡°Don¡¯t worry,¡± I reassured her, ¡°Just got in a fight with my parents. Happens every once in a while.¡±

    Of course, I wasn¡¯t being completely honest. I didn¡¯t talk to my parents much for the exact reasons that we ended up fighting over, making an interaction like this very unusual.

    She nodded, putting aside my problem for a moment.

    ¡°Anyway, you said yesterday that you had something that you wanted to ask me,¡± she reminded, ¡°What was it?¡±

    Remembering that I had asked her to remind me of this, I took the chance to finally have my burning question answered.

    ¡°What did you mean when you told me that you didn¡¯t think you had a hard life?¡± I probed, ¡°It¡¯s been bugging me ever since you said that.¡±

    ¡°Huh?¡± she asked, confused, ¡°When did I say that?¡±

    ¡°I think it was a few weeks ago, right after we met. You were talking about how you had lost your mother, and I said that your life must have been hard.¡±

    She put her hand on her chin, clearly thinking hard about what I had asked.

    ¡°I don¡¯t really remember that,¡± she admitted, ¡°But I don¡¯t think you¡¯re wrong, now that you mention it.¡±

    ¡°Huh?¡±

    ¡°I guess looking back, my life must have been pretty difficult. I mean, most people spend their entire childhoods with both parents present, or at the very least alive. But I never really considered it.¡±

    ¡°Why not?¡± I questioned, ¡°I¡¯ve felt that way about my own life, and I have both my parents.¡±

    ¡°I guess you get used to it,¡± she reasoned, ¡°I never really thought much about what I had lost. I was too busy being happy with what I had.¡±

    ¡°And what did you have?¡±

    ¡°Well, a loving father, for one. The more years I live, the more I recognize how lucky I am that he was the one my mother chose. He¡¯s not perfect by any means, but he cares a lot, and puts in everything he has to make sure we can get by.¡±

    ¡°Lucky you,¡± I commented, not making eye contact, ¡°I never really get along with my parents.¡±

    ¡°Why is that?¡±

    ¡°They¡¯re cowards. My eyes have been the bane of my existence for as long as I¡¯ve lived, and not once have they at all attempted to help blunt the pain I¡¯ve had to feel as a result.¡±

    She didn¡¯t say anything to that, instead turning her head to the sky.

    ¡°What else?¡± I continued.

    ¡°What?¡±

    ¡°What else have you been happy with in your life?¡±

    I saw her lips curl up slightly at that.

    ¡°I had a cute dog growing up.¡±

    ¡°Oh?¡± I asked, smirking, ¡°You never told me you were a dog person.¡±

    ¡°There¡¯s just something about them that¡¯s so, so cute. Like, when they jump on you and you get to feel their fur, and when they lick your face and ears, and, and,¡± she tried to keep going, but it was clear that her train of thought derailed.

    I, on the other hand, couldn¡¯t help but be impressed with her mental fortitude.

    ¡°It¡¯s amazing that you¡¯ve been able to see so much of your hard life that way. That¡¯s not something I can do.¡±

    ¡°Why not?¡±

    I was startled with her quick response. I looked at her with incredulous eyes, to which she only tilted her head in confusion.

    ¡°It¡¯s not like my attitude is something special. If anything, I¡¯ve just taken a different perspective than you have.¡±

    ¡°I don¡¯t get it,¡± I replied, beckoning her to continue.

    ¡°You know how when you take a picture, the colors are determined by the software that is present on the camera?¡± she illustrated, ¡°When you put those photos on a computer, however, you can do a lot with them. Change the colors, make them brighter or dimmer, give them special effects, things like that. I think I just changed the settings on the photos I take.¡±

    I took a look away from Iris, attempting to process the idea she had presented. What did it mean to change the photos of life? I wasn¡¯t a camera, and I didn¡¯t have the ability to connect to a computer to change any photos I did have.

    ¡°You like history, right?¡± she continued, unaware that I had lost focus for a moment, ¡°Depending on who you ask, any given war was either good or bad, right? Who¡¯s right, and who¡¯s wrong?¡±

    ¡°Well, it¡¯s impossible to say,¡± I immediately answered, ¡°After all, by focusing on different facts of particular events, it¡¯s possible to draw multiple different conclusions.¡±

    ¡°I think it¡¯s the same thing with me. I look at different facts than you do, given the same event. It¡¯s not just us, either. Everyone looks at the same events differently.¡±

    ¡°Is this something you¡¯ve learned by ¡®experiencing others¡¯?¡± I teased.

    Her face immediately reddened, and she broke eye contact for a moment.

    ¡°Stop it,¡± she whined.

    ¡°Hey guys, sorry I¡¯m late!¡± Cap¡¯s voice interrupted.

    I looked up at him, and his face went from its typical carefree demeanor to an incredulous stare.

    ¡°Wait, what did I miss?¡± he asked frantically, ¡°Did you ask her out or something?¡±

    I immediately buried my head in my hands, not sure how I would talk my way out of this one.

 V - Dictionary Definition

    The conversation with Iris had given me quite a bit to think about. While on the bus home from school that day, I took some time to deeply consider some of the ideas we had discussed.

    Even after a few classes had passed, I still wasn¡¯t able to fully comprehend the point Iris had been trying to make. Even though it made sense that some people look at the same thing differently, it didn¡¯t make sense to me that people could change which facts they focused on. In my experience, the only way to convince someone to change their mind about something is to present information that they didn¡¯t have. Specifically, by adding new facts to the equation. The idea that the same facts could produce a different result in the same person seemed to go against all logic.

    I knew that, at this point, I was just thinking in circles, and that I should just admire Iris¡¯ ability to see her life in a positive light. But it wasn¡¯t her way of seeing the world that was bothering me. I was well aware that people like her existed, and even if I wasn¡¯t aware, the possibility of such people existing was plainly obvious to anyone with the ability to think logically. The reason I was bothered was because she challenged me to do the same.

    The more I thought about it, the more I figured that it was just her own perspective being projected onto others. After all, I¡¯m not special for my own way of viewing the world, and I¡¯m sure if I was trying to convince her to see things my way I would have said the same thing.

    As the day went on, I decided to distract myself from my conversation with Iris by thinking more about the situation with Cap. While I was beginning to tolerate him a little more, we were clearly not able to interact like most friend groups at our school. At best, we would simply signal to one another as a greeting and farewell, and at worst Iris would have to serve as a sort of mediator between the two of us, as neither of us were willing to start a one-on-one conversation with the other. In fact, the lack of initiative from Cap¡¯s side was making me begin to doubt whether or not he even wanted to be friends.

    However, this train of thought lead me to another question: what even is friendship to begin with? The more I thought about it, the further the answer seemed from me. After all, I never had any friends growing up, and while Iris probably considered me a friend I certainly didn¡¯t know what that entailed.

    I decided to think over the way some of my peers acted around their own friends. This proved harder than I anticipated, considering how little I paid attention to any of them. I remembered the conversation between Miles, Alicia, Cap, and other students from the day I met Iris. It was mostly small talk, with little substance that mattered until I was thrust into the middle of it. I didn¡¯t remember quite what it was about, but something in my mind told me that it didn¡¯t particularly matter.

    I also considered thew way Iris communicated with me. She was always interested in what I had to say, during the times that I had anything to discuss at all. She claimed to hate small talk, a sentiment I shared, but whenever we spoke it never felt like small talk, no matter what we were talking about.

    In the case of Miles and Cap¡¯s friendship, I didn¡¯t know much about the details of what went on between the two of them, but Miles seemed very possessive of Cap. I remembered when Miles attacked me due to Cap spending more time with myself and Iris, and while it was not fun on my end it did make me wonder if that level of possessiveness is necessary to being a good friend.

    Despite all the time I had spent in deep thought, I was no closer to an answer than I was when I started. While most of the time I wouldn¡¯t give a second thought to the idea of friendship, as not having friends was something that I was used to, something about the dynamic between myself, Cap, and Iris wasn¡¯t right. I figured that figuring out what this meant might be the key to finally breaking the ice that separated the three of us.

    The next day, I decided to seek out some opinions on friendship, as attempting to reason my way through it was not working for me.

    First, I decided to ask Iris, who I once again got to talk to alone for a little while as Cap likely attempted to ward off his other friends.

    ¡°Friendship?¡± she repeated my question, ¡°It¡¯s hard to describe. I¡¯m your friend, right? How does that feel?¡±

    ¡°Are you my friend?¡± I answered with a question, ¡°I don¡¯t have a sense of what that means.¡±

    A slight pout found its way to her face.

    ¡°Are you saying that, after all this time, after pouring out our souls to each other, we¡¯re not friends?¡±

    I held up my hands, waving them slightly for emphasis.

    ¡°Firstly, that¡¯s a slight exaggeration. Secondly, that¡¯s not what I¡¯m saying. I don¡¯t know if you¡¯re my friend because I don¡¯t know what it means for someone to be my friend.¡±

    ¡°I don¡¯t know what it means, but you¡¯re my friend. It¡¯s not something you need to know to reap the benefits.¡±

    I slumped my shoulders in disappointment. While I wasn¡¯t surprised that I wasn¡¯t the only person to suffer from a lack of understanding, I was left just as confused as I was when I started.

    ¡°Why don¡¯t you ask Cap?¡± Iris asked, ¡°He has a lot more friends than me. Maybe he has a better grasp on the concept than I do.¡±

    I shook my head immediately.

    ¡°I don¡¯t want to ask Cap.¡±

    ¡°Why not?¡±

    I sighed in exasperation.The story has been taken without consent; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.

    ¡°Because he¡¯s partly the reason I¡¯m wondering to begin with. I don¡¯t know what he wants from me, and understanding friendship would help me understand why he wants to talk to me so much. Also, if I know what friendship means, I can be a friend to you.¡±

    Her hands moved over her chest, and her face turned slightly red.

    ¡°Are you saying that you want to be my friend?¡± she asked bashfully, ¡°Even though you don¡¯t know if we¡¯re friends?¡±

    ¡°Just because I don¡¯t know if you¡¯re my friend doesn¡¯t mean I don¡¯t want you to be,¡± I stated factually.

    ¡°Aw, how sweet,¡± Cap interrupted, arriving at that moment.

    I turned to him, making no attempt at hiding my displeasure.

    ¡°Haven¡¯t you heard of announcing yourself like a normal person?¡±

    He held his hands up in defense.

    ¡°Sorry, sorry,¡± he apologized halfheartedly.

    Lunch proceeded mostly smoothly from there, with Cap and I exchanging the minimum number of words between then and the end, as usual. After we all split up, I figured the next person I should ask would be someone whose ¡°friend list¡± probably surpassed nine thousand people at this point. Thankfully, there was only one person in the school with that ¡®honor¡¯.

    After the following class ended, I found myself at her desk.

    ¡°Excuse me,¡± I made my presence known.

    Alicia Alcantra, who at that point was quickly stuffing her books into her bag, turned to me incredulously.

    ¡°What do you want with me, Red-Eyes?¡± she asked, her tone revealing less malice than her choice of words would indicate.

    ¡°You have a lot of friends, right?¡± I murmured, unable to make eye contact.

    At that point, a bright smile appeared on her face.

    ¡°You bet!¡± she exclaimed, ¡°People like people like me!¡±

    I wanted to flinch at her haughty attitude, but held it in.

    ¡°I¡¯ve been wondering, what does it mean to be friends with someone?¡±

    Her eyebrows raised.

    ¡°I¡¯m surprised you¡¯re wondering that of all things. Didn¡¯t know you were capable of making friends.¡±

    The bite of her harsh words stung a bit, though it also gave me the resolve to make eye contact with her.

    ¡°I¡¯ll have you know I have at least one friend.¡±

    ¡°Iris, right?¡± she asked, ¡°What a nice girl. You¡¯re lucky that she¡¯s the one who finally took pity on you.¡±

    ¡°Look,¡± I attempted to get her back on track, but she interrupted me before I could say anything else.

    ¡°Sorry, but class is starting in a few minutes,¡± she brushed me off, ¡°Friendship is exactly what it sounds like. Not sure there¡¯s anything more to say there.¡±

    At that point, she walked away, leaving me alone in the classroom.

    ¡°Um, excuse me,¡± a voice timidly called out.

    At least, I thought I was alone. When I turned around to find the source of the voice, I saw Viridia Fisher, another girl in my grade.

    ¡°Viridia,¡± I stated with my eyebrows raised, ¡°This is a surprise. You never talk to me.¡±

    ¡°I just thought,¡± she started, ¡°You were wondering what a friend is, right?¡±

    ¡°I¡¯m surprised you of all people are willing to answer my question,¡± I commented, ¡°Didn¡¯t think you particularly liked me.¡±

    ¡°It¡¯s not like I hate you,¡± she complained, ¡°But my friends expect things of me.¡±

    ¡°Well, what were you going to tell me?¡± I asked, impatient.

    ¡°Friends are people who are there for each other,¡± she attempted to explain, ¡°But I don¡¯t really know much more.¡±

    ¡°Makes sense, you¡¯re kinda the beta of your friend group,¡± I murmured under my breath.

    When I made eye contact, she immediately looked away.

    ¡°Thanks,¡± I genuinely expressed, ¡°You¡¯ve been more helpful than anyone else I¡¯ve asked so far.¡±

    ¡°You¡¯re welcome,¡± she murmured, ¡°I need to go now.¡±

    ¡°Same.¡±

    With that, we both walked out. Somehow, I recognized that I was starting to make progress on my intellectual mission, even if the source was somewhat unexpected.

    After that, though, I was at a loss for who to talk to. Mr. MacArthur had a meeting after classes ended that day, which meant that I wouldn¡¯t be able to ask him for help. I wasn¡¯t particularly comfortable talking to my parents after the previous fight, and as I told Iris, Cap was off the table.

    With nowhere to turn to, I spent the rest of the school day simply meandering through my classes with little focus. Thankfully, I was gifted with a new piece of information when I was on my way out.

    I wasn¡¯t planning on stopping anywhere on the way home that day, so when I left the school building, I tried to make a direct path to the bus stop to wait. On my way out, however, someone unexpected stopped me.

    ¡°Hey, Ret, wait up!¡±

    I turned in surprise to see Iris running toward me.

    ¡°What¡¯s up?¡± I asked, ¡°You don¡¯t normally communicate with me outside of lunch.¡±

    ¡°Please don¡¯t, right now,¡± she panted, ¡°I think I have an idea about the question you asked.¡±

    ¡°You mean about friendship?¡±

    She nodded, eager to share her discovery.

    ¡°Trust,¡± she said, ¡°It¡¯s about trust.¡±

    I stroked my chin in thought.

    ¡°I guess I can see how that would play into it, but I¡¯m not sure how that works.¡±

    ¡°I¡¯m sorry, I can¡¯t put much else into words. But I think trust plays into it somehow.¡±

    I nodded, then let a small smile adorn my face.

    ¡°Thanks. I¡¯ll think it over.¡±

    Seeing me in a state resembling happiness, she returned my smile.

    ¡°Of course,¡± she expressed, ¡°Any time.¡±

    After we exchanged our goodbyes, we split up. I was initially surprised she wasn¡¯t coming to the bus stop with me, but then I remembered that she lived within walking distance.

    ¡°Lucky her,¡± I murmured to myself, ¡°I could do without all this social interaction.¡±

    While riding the bus was far from painful now that I was used to it, often I was still stuck sitting next to someone, and there were times that my reputation made that less than pleasant, even if I had mostly grown accustomed to any harassment. However, I didn¡¯t have any other consistent way home. While I recently had gotten my driver¡¯s license, our family only owned two cars, and both my parents were working. I didn¡¯t have a part-time job to help save up for a car either.

    On the way home, I took stock of everything I had learned that day. While Alicia hadn¡¯t been helpful at all, despite her experience, Viridia had been gracious enough to give me her impression of friendship. She had said that friends are there for each other. It seemed to make sense, but I wasn¡¯t completely certain what she meant. Of course friends like to be around each other, that seems like common sense. However, it didn¡¯t tell me what it mean to ¡°be there¡± for someone beyond simply being near them. By that logic, I¡¯d be friends with Mr. MacArthur, who I enjoyed being around.

    Iris¡¯ idea was certainly more firm, but the application to my life was hazy. If trust was involved with friendship, I wasn¡¯t sure how on Earth I was supposed to have friends. After all, besides Mr. MacArthur, who I wouldn¡¯t consider a ¡®friend¡¯, I didn¡¯t particularly trust anyone, and certainly not at a level that I would consider ¡®friendship¡¯.

    At this point, all the answers I had gotten just left me with more questions. In addition, something else was bothering me. I wasn¡¯t certain why, all of a sudden, I was interested in the idea of friendship. I knew I wasn¡¯t satisfied with our lunch group, but it didn¡¯t explain why I gravitated toward that particular question. I never had the need for friends before, so why did I care now? Was Cap really getting to me that much? Was I really considering letting a former tormentor into my life as a friend?

    At this point, I was completely exhausted from all these mental exercises. I figured it would be wise to get home, complete my schoolwork, and get some rest. It would allow me to prepare for whatever would happen the following day.

    Though no amount of rest would prepare me for what was to come.

 VI - The Missing Link

    I was never one to be bothered by rumors. It could have been immunity through exposure, but I had heard so many rumors growing up that they all were easy to brush off and leave in the past. That was what made this particular day so bizarre for me.

    I could hear rumblings as early as the bus ride in the morning. While I wasn¡¯t able to tell what anyone was saying, I had gotten proficient at analyzing the tone of hushed conversations, and I could immediately tell that whatever the crowd was talking about, it was social gossip that was making the early rounds. I wasn¡¯t particularly curious at the time, but as it would turn out, the gossip would end up reaching my ears.

    After the first class of the day, the halls were bustling with hushed whispers and people pointing at me. This was nothing unusual, as it happened once or twice every other week when someone got a funny new idea for how to mess with me. However, when I reached second period, I was finally able to get a whiff of the information that had been spreading like a rampaging wildfire.

    ¡°Hey, did you hear the news?¡± one student was telling his friend.

    ¡°What ¡®news¡¯? What are you talking about?¡±

    ¡°Apparently Cap¡¯s gotten caught up in some messy legal case,¡± he continued, ¡°It¡¯s why he¡¯s absent today.¡±

    Hearing Cap¡¯s name immediately caught my attention, as I was expecting whatever rumor it was to either be about me or someone I didn¡¯t know, as those were the two scenarios that made up a supermajority of rumors.

    The first surprise in the rumor, however, wasn¡¯t the rumor at all. Ever since the semester started, Cap had maintained perfect attendance, and in past years his attendance rate was in the highest percentile in the entire class, making every day he missed an unusual event. So hearing that he wasn¡¯t at school, especially if it wasn¡¯t because of an illness, was quite the surprise.

    ¡°Really?¡± his friend responded eagerly, ¡°You think he¡¯s gonna end up in jail?¡±

    ¡°Haha, maybe,¡± the first student guessed, ¡°Isn¡¯t that crazy, though? Never thought Cap was a bad boy.¡±

    For whatever reason, hearing them diss Cap was beginning to get on my nerves. Unable to control myself, I turned to them, not hiding my irritation.

    ¡°What the hell are you talking about?¡± I confronted, ¡°There¡¯s now way Cap got caught up in any criminal activity.¡±

    The first student, whose name eluded me, raised his hands in defense.

    ¡°Hey, it¡¯s just a rumor. It¡¯s not like it¡¯s confirmed or anything.¡±

    His friend, on the other hand, had different ideas.

    ¡°Hey, you¡¯re that red-eyed kid,¡± he observed, ¡°How the hell did you get Cap to talk to you anyway? Nobody likes you.¡±

    While I was used to such direct attacks, this one hurt more than usual.

    ¡°I don¡¯t see how I play into this,¡± I muttered.

    ¡°Maybe he heard about Cap¡¯s criminal background, and blackmailed him into spending his lunches with them!¡± the first student gleefully speculated.

    I felt my fist begin to clench, but I managed to keep myself from doing anything rash. Instead, I told them exactly what I thought.

    ¡°Maybe you should keep your speculation to yourself, assholes. You don¡¯t seem to know anything about what you¡¯re talking about.¡±

    ¡°Oh, what, did the freak get butt-hurt over what we said about him? Doesn¡¯t change what happened,¡± the second student taunted.

    I ignored him, instead focusing on calming myself down. My mind was filled with one thing: a command not to punch the both of them. The last thing I needed at this point was discipline from the teachers over such a stupid incident.

    As the day went on, though, I realized that my lack of control during second period had backfired. In spite of my angry denial, the rumor that I had blackmailed Cap, who was facing criminal charges, spread incredibly quickly, to the point where I was almost impressed with the efficiency with which it was permeating through the student body. Every class, it seemed like all anyone was talking about was the rumor about Cap, and the fact that Cap wasn¡¯t here to dispute the original rumor wasn¡¯t helping me, as nobody would trust the word of a freak like me.

    Once lunch rolled around, I figured that I had to consult Iris over the situation that was unfolding. She was even more friendly with Cap than I was, even if it wasn¡¯t saying much, and the time I had spent with her over the prior three weeks told me that, like me, she wasn¡¯t enjoying the rumors that were going around about us.

    It turned out to be even worse than I thought. Once I got to lunch, I found Iris almost in tears, with her fist clenched as well.

    ¡°Hey, there, Iris,¡± I greeted awkwardly, not sure how to break the ice, ¡°What¡¯s going on?¡±

    She looked up at me, and I saw a mix of anger and sadness in her eyes.

    ¡°What¡¯s going on right now?¡± she pleaded, ¡°Why are so many bad rumors going around?¡±

    ¡°I heard about them too,¡± I admitted, ¡°I may have even fanned the flames a bit.¡±

    ¡°What do you mean?¡±

    I told Iris about the argument I had gotten into with the idiots in second period, and how the rumors morphed to match their warped version of events as the day had gone on.

    ¡°So you haven¡¯t heard?¡± was her response.

    ¡°Huh?¡±

    ¡°There¡¯s more than just that,¡± Iris recounted, ¡°Apparently there are rumors going around that the three of us were in an illicit sexual relationship, and that Cap and I are being dragged along by you.¡±

    Quite appropriately, my vision went completely red. How dare they bring Iris into this, and how dare they sully her reputation because of what I did? This was no joke. Rumors like this could easily ruin reputations, and now Iris has been tangled in this web of rumors that I naively expanded with my own hands.

    ¡°Ret? You¡¯re scaring me right now.¡±Did you know this story is from Royal Road? Read the official version for free and support the author.

    Hearing fear in Iris¡¯ voice, I began to calm down a little bit.

    ¡°I can¡¯t let this keep going on,¡± I muttered, only barely keeping control, ¡°You two are being hurt because of me, and I can¡¯t stand for that.¡±

    ¡°Ret, what are you trying to say?¡±

    ¡°I think I should leave,¡± I propose.

    Iris¡¯ eyes widen.

    ¡°Ret, what are you saying?¡±

    ¡°I¡¯m the one who¡¯s gotten you into this mess. I¡¯m the reason these rumors are going around. If I leave, your life might go back to normal.¡±

    Iris shook her head, resolve appearing in her previously emotional eyes.

    ¡°You¡¯re my friend, Ret. Probably my best friend, at this point. I don¡¯t want you to leave, even if it means my reputation is hurt because of it.¡±

    ¡°But if I wasn¡¯t here, then-¡°

    ¡°What¡¯s your evidence?¡± she challenged me.

    I didn¡¯t answer. I couldn¡¯t answer. Instead, I let her continue.

    ¡°You think just because you got in that argument, those guys wanted to get you back? That¡¯s a load of crap, and you know it.¡±

    ¡°But it could just be my reputation.¡±

    ¡°People make up things about people all the time,¡± Iris contended, ¡°That¡¯s not abnormal. Rumors die as fast as they¡¯re born. This hurts, but this will pass. If you leave, and don¡¯t come back, then you¡¯re doing exactly what they all want, and the effects will last longer. Think about it, Ret.¡±

    I chuckled a little bit at the rising irony of the situation.

    ¡°What¡¯s so funny?¡±

    ¡°It¡¯s just that,¡± I started, ¡°We started with you crying, and now you¡¯re cheering me up. Just a little ironic, that¡¯s all.¡±

    ¡°Are you feeling better, Ret?¡±

    I nodded.

    ¡°A bit. I still feel guilty over this, but you¡¯re right. Rumors have followed me for so long, and they never last longer than a day or two. People will forget, and move on, just like they always do.¡±

    ¡°If you feel guilty, I have a way you can pay me back,¡± Iris offered.

    ¡°What is it?¡± I asked.

    ¡°Be my friend.¡±

    I laughed.

    ¡°Had a feeling you were going to say that,¡± I chuckled, reaching my hand out for a shake.

    She returned it.

    ¡°Glad to hear you¡¯re feeling better,¡± she expressed, ¡°Now let¡¯s figure out how we can fight these rumors on Cap¡¯s behalf.¡±

    ¡°I thought we agreed to just let them pass,¡± I objected.

    ¡°Nope,¡± she denied, shaking her head, ¡°Cap¡¯s not here to fight for himself like we are. So we can¡¯t assume that he¡¯d be okay with just letting them pass. Unlike you, Cap probably hasn¡¯t had to deal with many situations like this in his life.¡±

    ¡°Fair enough,¡± I conceded.

    ¡°So, the first question is how we¡¯re going to tackle dismantling these rumors. If we don¡¯t have some kind of strategy, this isn¡¯t going to work.¡±

    Unfortunately, she was right. The two of us being subjects of the rumors removed our credibility, as we had an interest in people not talking about them. If we weren¡¯t careful, we would only dig ourselves, and by extension Cap deeper into the hole we were already in.

    ¡°So, what do you have in mind?¡± I asked, not having anything to pitch as a starting idea.

    She didn¡¯t answer for a moment, but I could see the gears turning in her head as she wracked her brain for a solution. After a minute of this, things finally shifted.

    ¡°Say, what was the original rumor?¡±

    ¡°Why do you ask?¡± I responded.

    ¡°You said you were the reason the rumor morphed into what it is,¡± she explained, ¡°Whether or not that¡¯s true, it means you knew the rumor changed, meaning you probably knew what it was before you got involved.

    ¡°That¡¯s true, I do know,¡± I admitted, ¡°But the question is why it¡¯s important.¡±

    ¡°Just answer me, for now.¡±

    ¡°The original rumor was that Cap¡¯s absence was due to some legal issue he had been involved in. Apparently a lot of people were beginning to think that ¡®legal issue¡¯ was criminal in some way.¡±

    She nodded slowly, her eyes not finding a point to focus on.

    ¡°See, rumors rarely come from nowhere. They usually have a grain of truth at their center, and the falsehoods come from third-party interpretations and details being lost in transition.¡±

    ¡°What?¡± I stammered, completely bewildered.

    ¡°You¡¯ve played telephone, right?¡± she checked, prompting a nod, ¡°In the game of telephone, it isn¡¯t uncommon for the choice word or phrase to get mangled by the end. Now imagine that, except everyone needs to wait fifteen minutes to two hours before sharing the word. If they didn¡¯t mishear it already, their memory could be faulty.¡±

    ¡°That makes sense, but how would it turn from Cap being a criminal into me forcing you two to, uh, do ¡®things¡¯ for me?¡±

    Turning red at my choice of words, Iris pushed forward as fast as she could.

    ¡°Not only is the rumor being transformed by error, but people are inputting new pieces of information during transit. You getting involved gave the other boys the impression that you had a stake in Cap¡¯s state, and they drew conclusions from that. In the process of spreading rumors, both malicious and unwitting people input their own experiences and interpretations to change the substance completely.¡±

    ¡°But how does this matter?¡± I probed, still confused, ¡°Just because we knew where the rumor came from doesn¡¯t mean we know how to stop it.¡±

    ¡°I said earlier that there is a grain of truth at every rumor,¡± she continued, ¡°By finding the earliest version of the rumor we can, we remove a lot of that error and the negative additions. It¡¯s like asking the second or third person in the telephone what they heard instead of the tenth. That¡¯s going to be a lot closer to the original truth that started the rumor, isn¡¯t it?¡±

    I nodded, finally putting the pieces of the puzzle together. If we knew the truth, it was possible to spin the rumor back to its origin, thus mitigating the damage from it.

    ¡°But even if we know the truth, we still don¡¯t have a way to spread our ¡®rumor¡¯ without causing credibility concerns,¡± I argued, ¡°We¡¯re not exactly the most unbiased people involved in this rumor mill.¡±

    ¡°I know,¡± Iris reiterated, ¡°But I don¡¯t know how we get over that particular roadblock yet.¡±

    I slumped in my seat, feeling only a sense of defeat despite all the progress we had made.

    ¡°Maybe while we think that over, we should figure out what this ¡®grain of truth¡¯ is in the rumor,¡± I state.

    ¡°I agree,¡± Iris said, ¡°At this point I¡¯m just thinking in circles.¡±

    ¡°So, the ¡®original¡¯ rumor was that he was missing class for legal reasons,¡± I summarized, ¡°Some kind of case that wasn¡¯t included in the rumor.¡±

    ¡°Maybe that¡¯s all true,¡± Iris reasoned, ¡°Or maybe only part of it is. I think the key is in this statement, though.¡±

    ¡°What are the alternatives?¡±

    ¡°It could be that he was picked up by the police for some kind of minor violation, or that he¡¯s being called into a trial as a witness of some kind. Or maybe he just got a ticket and stayed home depressed.¡±

    I considered each option. I didn¡¯t see Cap as a criminal of any kind, but misdemeanor offenses were surprisingly common in our age group, even if few were actually prosecuted for it. While being called in as a witness would have been the least problematic on an ethical level, and would match up with the rumor quite well, there was no indication that anything was weighing on him recently that hadn¡¯t been before. He also didn¡¯t seem like the type to stay home depressed because of something as minor as a traffic violation, meaning a ticket was likely also off the table.

    ¡°It¡¯s no good,¡± I gave in, ¡°There¡¯s something missing in our understanding. None of these scenarios make too much sense, and we don¡¯t have the information to draw any other conclusions right now.¡±

    ¡°I don¡¯t want to admit it, but I think you¡¯re right, Ret,¡± she agreed, ¡°We need to talk to Cap and get his story directly.¡±

    ¡°Difficult to do when neither of us knows where he lives.¡±

    After that, we remained silent, attempting to reconcile our own thoughts on the situation. As I saw it, we were going to have our reputations smashed to bits, and there was nothing we could do until we were able to work with Cap to fix any misunderstandings. While under most circumstances, I wouldn¡¯t care to move toward reconciliation with regard to these rumors, this time was different. I wasn¡¯t the only one hurt by this, and I couldn¡¯t let my own problems affect the lives and reputations of others.

    In other words, they were counting on me, so I needed to answer the call.

    ¡°I¡¯m going to figure this out,¡± I declared, standing up, ¡°Leave it to me, Iris.¡±

    She looked up at me, surprised by my sudden outburst.

    ¡°Are you sure? I can help if you need,¡± she offered.

    ¡°I may take you up on that,¡± I conceded, ¡°But I¡¯ll take the lead here. I¡¯ll make sure the three of us make it out of this. You have my word.¡±

    Her half-open mouth curved into a smile.

    ¡°Of course, Ret,¡± she accepted, ¡°If you need any help, let me know, and I¡¯ll be happy to oblige you. My reputation is at stake as much as yours, after all.¡±

    ¡°Are you saying you¡¯re only helping because you¡¯re in trouble too?¡± I snarked.

    She shook her head.

    ¡°I¡¯m telling you not to feel bad asking for my help, not that I wouldn¡¯t give it to you otherwise. You really need to stop assuming we¡¯re all out to get you, Ret.¡±

    I chuckled, impressed at her steady response.

    ¡°Maybe you¡¯re right, Iris. Maybe you¡¯re right.¡±

    And with that, we parted ways. With a commitment given and a plan started, it was time for me to get to work repairing what little social capital the two of us had left. No, the three of us.

 VII - A Friend In Need

    While I was certainly motivated to get this rumor off our backs, motivation is only one piece of the problem-solving puzzle, and unfortunately for me I was missing all of the others as well.

    I didn¡¯t have any experience dealing with this kind of problem, and I wasn¡¯t sure if there was a handy guidebook to dispelling rumors anywhere. In fact, odds are there wasn¡¯t, as otherwise dumb rumors like this wouldn¡¯t be destroying reputations all over the country. I considered consulting Mr. MacArthur about this, but I didn¡¯t want to get him involved with what would likely be such a time-consuming process. He had enough work on his plate between his job and his family.

    The best solution seemed to be to hear the story from the horse¡¯s mouth, but Cap was missing from school today, and I didn¡¯t know his phone number. Even if I did, though, if he really was dealing with legal problems, he would likely be too busy to talk to me, if he even wanted to at all. Unless, by some miracle, I managed to run into him on the street, I wouldn¡¯t be able to get the truth out of him at all.

    Seemingly out of options, I decided to make my way straight home once classes got out. I didn¡¯t think it would be smart to stick around and attempt to make a plan with all the distractions of school, particularly when it was possible some jerk would decide to have some fun at my expense.

    Unfortunately, I was na?ve to think I would escape the school building unscathed.

    ¡°Hey, Red-Eyes,¡± a voice addressed me as I was walking to the bus.

    I turned my eyes to see Cap¡¯s friend Miles standing by a street sign, clearly irritated. While he was the last person I wanted to see at the time, I decided that he deserved a slight bit of mockery before I departed.

    ¡°Why, hello there Miles,¡± I greeted, a clear sense of superiority present in my voice, ¡°How¡¯s Cap doing? Heard he missed class today, and I imagine he would have told you of all people why.¡±

    ¡°Don¡¯t screw with me,¡± he growled, failing to hold anything remotely akin to a poker face, ¡°I know you¡¯re the reason he¡¯s not here.¡±

    I raised my eyebrows in surprise. I was attempting to aggravate Miles when I said what I did, but was I actually correct? If so, why would Cap have stayed home because of me?

    ¡°Excuse me?¡± I asked, ¡°This is news to me. The two of us haven¡¯t talked much recently, so I missed out on a lot of the news.¡±

    ¡°That¡¯s not what I mean, dumbass,¡± he raged, ¡°Cap¡¯s reputation has been dragged through the mud because of you, and it¡¯s hurting all of us.¡±

    ¡°What do you mean, ¡®because of me¡¯? I¡¯m not the one spreading these asinine rumors, and they¡¯re certainly not true. Don¡¯t assume this is my fault just because I exist.¡±

    ¡°Do you care about anyone but yourself, Red-Eyes? This isn¡¯t about you.¡±

    ¡°Right, right,¡± I halfheartedly responded, ¡°It¡¯s all about you, Miles. You don¡¯t like that your reputation has been sullied by false rumors, and so you¡¯re taking out your anger on the easy target instead of trying to actually solve the problem. God, you people are so simple.¡±

    ¡°What did you say, punk?¡± he murmured, taking a step forward.

    ¡°I said you¡¯re targeting me for self-satisfaction instead of actually doing something right.¡±

    At this point, I could see his muscles begin to bulge slightly, and his face contorted strangely, almost giving off a false anger that is common in stage production. However, I knew that he was completely serious about what he was planning to do, and I suddenly had the desire to run for the hills.

    ¡°You son of a-¡° he snarled.

    Then, he charged me. Expecting this, I jumped back, hoping he had planned his actions in advance and would thus end up off-balance. However, I had clearly underestimated his physical abilities, and I was quickly met with a sharp pain in my nose.

    ¡°Guh,¡± I grunted, grabbing my face.

    He had landed a direct, full-power punch to my face, leaving me staggering back. Momentarily contemplating how miraculous it was that I stayed on my feet, I decided that the fight was already lost, and decided to retreat.

    When I started running, however, I could hear Miles¡¯ voice following me in the distance.

    ¡°Get back here you little sh-¡° he started.

    However, by the time he had finished his sentence, I had already made it to the other side of the nearby train tracks, with the gate coming down signifying a train close by. Sensing safety, I stopped to catch my breath. After that terrifying altercation, I lamented my relative lack of physical ability, as it would have made a big difference.

    However, in that moment, I let my guard down, and the next thing I knew, I was on the ground.

    Ignoring the pain in my left side, I turned my eyes up to see Miles straddling my right side, shoving my body into the ground.

    ¡°You¡¯re gonna pay for what you did to Cap, Red-Eyes,¡± he declared, ¡°I don¡¯t let anyone who hurts my friends get away with it.¡±

    ¡°You say that,¡± I gasped, ¡°Like you know what¡¯s going on.¡±

    ¡°And you say that like your next bed isn¡¯t going to be in a hospital somewhere.¡±

    Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a punch coming toward me. I closed my eyes, desperate to preserve any ability to escape I could.

    ¡°Hey, stop!¡±

    The voice that rang out while my eyes were closed stopped the punch from ever landing. Once I was certain that I was safe, I opened my eyes to look at the owner of the voice, though in truth I knew who it was the moment I heard it.

    ¡°Cap?¡± I muttered, seeing a blurry figure run toward us.

    Miles, who looked like a deer caught in headlights, immediately got up, leaving my prone body on the ground while Cap approached.This book is hosted on another platform. Read the official version and support the author''s work.

    ¡°What the hell is going on here?¡± Cap asked in angry bewilderment, ¡°Miles, what are you doing?¡±

    ¡°This guy¡¯s out here ruining our reputation,¡± Miles replied, his voice clearly reflecting a sense of righteousness, ¡°I¡¯m just fixing the problem for you.¡±

    ¡°And who asked you to do that?¡± Cap closed his eyes, putting on a fa?ade of calmness.

    ¡°No one in particular, but if you knew what people are saying about you because of him, you would be thanking me.¡±

    Cap remained silent for a moment, his face keeping a stern, but calm demeanor. I could tell that it was all he could do to not burst out in anger right then.

    ¡°So why did you think it was a good idea to attack my friend, again?¡± Cap questioned, ¡°If this is just because of some rumors that are going around, why would it be okay to resort to violence, exactly?¡±

    ¡°Cap, you don¡¯t understand,¡± Miles protested, recognizing the situation he was in.

    My eyes widened, in spite of the pain I was in. Cap Johnson, one of my biggest antagonizers for all of middle school, was actively defending me against someone who was doing exactly what he used to do.

    ¡°I understand plenty,¡± Cap expressed, ¡°Miles, I can¡¯t believe you. I¡¯ve been attempting to put my past with Ret behind me, and you go and pull this stunt. If he thinks, for whatever reason, that I¡¯m a problem because you went and did this, that¡¯s on you, not him. You attacked him over something petty. From what it sounds like, you¡¯re just mad that your reputation was hurt by something that he said or did, and that¡¯s no reason to lose your cool.¡±

    ¡°I¡¯m sorry,¡± Miles broke eye contact with Cap, ¡°I did lose my head a bit. But it was to defend you.¡±

    ¡°I¡¯m sorry too. I don¡¯t want to deal with friends that commit violence for my sake. So I think we¡¯re done.¡±

    ¡°Excuse me?¡± Miles asked.

    ¡°I don¡¯t want to be your friend, and no friend of mine would do what you did. So goodbye, Miles.¡±

    Cap, who was done speaking with Miles, walked over to me. Miles remained frozen in place, unable to say anything after what had just transpired.

    ¡°You okay, Ret?¡± He asked, lending me a hand.

    I took his hand, and stood up with only slight trouble.

    ¡°I¡¯ll live,¡± I concluded, ¡°Nose is probably broken, and I¡¯m going to have to deal with some extreme bruising, but it¡¯ll heal in time.¡±

    ¡°Glad to hear it,¡± Cap nodded, a smile appearing on his face, ¡°Why don¡¯t we go get some food, and you can explain to me what¡¯s going on?¡±

    I nodded. While I still wasn¡¯t thrilled at the prospect of sharing dinner with Cap, I did probably owe him an explanation at the very least, as these rumors would affect him more than either me or Iris. Plus, something in me couldn¡¯t turn him down after he intervened in our fight and saved me a trip to the emergency room.

    After determining a nearby diner to eat at, we made our way over there, leaving Miles to deal with his crisis himself. Once we arrived, I ignored the strange looks I received from nearby strangers to focus on the questions I had for Cap.

    ¡°How on Earth did you find us?¡± I asked, ¡°You weren¡¯t at school. The odds are one in a million that you just happen to come across us fighting at that time.¡±

    ¡°I won¡¯t deny that,¡± he admitted, ¡°I was pretty lucky to be out there when I was.¡±

    ¡°That doesn¡¯t answer my question,¡± I pointed out, ¡°Why were you there in the first place?¡±

    ¡°I live near the train tracks. I was just taking a walk.¡±

    I blinked in surprise.

    ¡°That¡¯s it? Pure, dumb luck that we happened to be there?¡±

    ¡°Yup,¡± Cap confirmed, ¡°Just happened to be there.¡±

    I sighed.

    ¡°So much for my theory that you embedded a tracking device in my skull in middle school.¡±

    Cap started laughing at my joke.

    ¡°Damn, dude,¡± he chuckled, ¡°Didn¡¯t know you had a sense of humor.¡±

    ¡°I didn¡¯t really realize it myself,¡± I shrugged.

    ¡°So what¡¯s up with these rumors?¡± Cap asked, suddenly serious, ¡°Miles mentioned something about how they were your fault, but I never got a chance to hear what actually is going on.¡±

    ¡°That¡¯s complete bogus,¡± I replied, ¡°I had nothing to do with the rumors spreading.¡±

    It wasn¡¯t completely true, but I rolled with it anyway.

    ¡°What are these rumors?¡± Cap asked again.

    ¡°I heard several flavors throughout the day,¡± I explained, ¡°Early in the day it was that you missed school due to some kind of legal thing, and later in the day it was that I was blackmailing you and Iris into being my friend, and doing some...let¡¯s say unscrupulous acts with you two. They¡¯re obviously full of hot air, but Iris and I were quite bothered by them.¡±

    ¡°Wait, you were bothered by rumors?¡± Cap repeated, ¡°After all the rumors that you let slide when we were in middle school, now you¡¯re bothered?¡±

    I nodded.

    ¡°That kinda hurts my pride a bit,¡± Cap murmured.

    Seeing me raise my eyebrow, he quickly became apologetic.

    ¡°No, no, I don¡¯t mean that the way you think,¡± he explained, ¡°It¡¯s just that when you do something, there¡¯s a sense of pride in knowing you did it right. I don¡¯t mean to do that to you anymore, I promise.¡±

    Not seeing anything to say in response, I shrugged my shoulders.

    ¡°Whatever,¡± I replied halfheartedly, ¡°I owe you one, so I¡¯ll let it slide. It¡¯s not like I was bothered by them for my own sake, anyway.¡±

    ¡°What do you mean?¡±

    ¡°The rumors involved you and Iris. If it was just me, I wouldn¡¯t care.¡±

    I heard a slight ¡®ah¡¯ from Cap, and figured my explanation was good enough.

    ¡°So, what do you think?¡± I asked.

    ¡°Think about what?¡±

    ¡°The rumors,¡± I repeated.

    This time, it was his turn to sigh.

    ¡°Well, you¡¯re right that they¡¯re mostly wrong,¡± he admitted, ¡°But there¡¯s some truth there.¡±

    ¡°Iris said that might be the case,¡± I recalled, ¡°At the heart of every convincing rumor is a grain of truth.¡±

    ¡°A bit more than a grain here,¡± he said.

    I tilted my head, signaling my curiosity.

    ¡°There¡¯s a lot going on, it¡¯s going to take a while to explain,¡± he explained, ¡°I¡¯m not even sure I can get to it all here.¡±

    ¡°That¡¯s fine,¡± I responded, ¡°What¡¯s the short version?¡±

    He sighed again.

    ¡°You¡¯re persistent, aren¡¯t you?¡± he commented, ¡°Very well. The part about the legal case is true. I¡¯m involved in quite the situation right now, and since it¡¯s mostly happening in the morning I have to miss class.¡±

    ¡°What¡¯s going on, Cap?¡± I asked, growing concerned, ¡°Is this related to why you¡¯ve been spending more time with me recently?¡±

    Surprisingly, he chuckled at this.

    ¡°Now that you mention it, there could be an indirect connection,¡± he said, ¡°But I never really thought about it like that.¡±

    ¡°Cap,¡± I looked him in the eye, ¡°If you want me to trust you, you have to trust me too. What¡¯s going on?¡±

    After a moment of hesitation, Cap finally gave in.

    ¡°Fine, but this is going to take a while. Why don¡¯t we head back to my place first?¡±

    After paying for our food, we departed the restaurant. At this point, I was equal parts curious and afraid. I wasn¡¯t sure what he was going to tell me when we arrived, but I was beginning to hope that it wasn¡¯t anything that would tie me up. The last thing I needed was involvement in a scandal of some kind.

    ¡°Here we are,¡± Cap pointed as we arrived.

    It was a small home a few blocks from the train tracks. For what seemed like a relatively cheap property, though, it was quite well-kept. The house seemed like it had been painted recently, and the grass was neatly trimmed. In addition, there was a garden out front that clearly got a lot of love from whoever was in charge of gardening.

    ¡°Seems like a cozy home,¡± I commented, ¡°Small and sweet.¡±

    ¡°Definitely,¡± he agreed, ¡°I wouldn¡¯t trade it for a million-dollar mansion any day of the week.¡±

    Cap invited me inside, and I cautiously followed him. Despite his previous actions, and the growing comfort level I had been dealing with recently, I had to remind myself that this was the same Cap Johnson that would give me wedgies every other lunch period in middle school. I had to keep him at arm¡¯s length until I could be sure of his intentions, no matter how nice he seemed on the surface.

    I took a seat on the couch in the living room, and Cap sat in a chair opposite a small coffee table in the middle of the room.

    ¡°So what were we talking about?¡± he asked.

    ¡°I think you were going to tell me about this legal thing, and how it potentially impacted your change in attitude toward me.¡±

    ¡°That¡¯s right, I did say that,¡± he conceded, ¡°Was hoping you¡¯d forget, to be honest.¡±

    ¡°Sorry, I have a good memory,¡± I smirked.

    ¡°Apparently so,¡± he laughed.

    I leaned forward, ready to hear his story. With the amount of pressure I had put him under, I could only hope it was good. As he began explaining, I listened in earnest, attempting to soak up every detail I could. And in the process, hopefully I could finally find a reason to trust him.

 VIII - Shattered Family

    ¡°So, where should I start?¡± Cap asked.

    ¡°Where were you today? That¡¯s the crux of the rumor,¡± I answered.

    Cap looked away for a moment, showing uncertainty.

    ¡°I hope my mom¡¯s okay with me telling you,¡± he worried.

    I put my hands together, showing my consent.

    ¡°I¡¯ll take responsibility.¡±

    ¡°Well, then,¡± he started, ¡°I¡¯ll start by saying the court case wasn¡¯t about me. At least, not directly.¡±

    ¡°Were you a witness of some kind?¡± I probed.

    ¡°Sort of, but more like a plaintiff,¡± he explained, ¡°You see, my parents are getting divorced.¡±

    My eyes widened.

    ¡°You¡¯re kidding,¡± I murmured, ¡°That¡¯s terrible.¡±

    ¡°You have two parents, right?¡± he asked, ¡°I know a lot of people extol the virtues of growing up in a two-parent household, but as far as I care that¡¯s a load of crap. I would have been better with just one parent.¡±

    I cringed, feeling slight empathy toward him.

    ¡°I get it,¡± I responded, ¡°I don¡¯t get along with my parents either. Sometimes I wonder whether I¡¯d be better off dealing with my problems on my own.¡±

    ¡°I don¡¯t think that¡¯s the same thing,¡± Cap denied, ¡°It¡¯s complicated with my family.¡±

    ¡°Can you explain more?¡± I requested.

    He sighed.

    ¡°See, my dad isn¡¯t exactly the image of a model parent. Ever since I was young, I remember him treating the two of us very harshly. When I was in elementary school, any time I brought home a grade that was less than perfect, I¡¯d end up with a ruler in my back. I saw him hit Mom on a regular basis, and there were nights that he¡¯d come home drunk and beat on both of us, just for the hell of it.¡±

    ¡°Oh, God,¡± I gasped, ¡°That¡¯s horrible.¡±

    ¡°I thought for years that was just how you treated people when you were angry at them, but by fifth grade my mother had had enough of me getting into trouble at school for violent behavior. I remember clearly what the trigger was.¡±

    Apparently, the line for the water fountain had been pretty long at recess that day. A young Cap, who had forgotten to bring his water bottle, was incredibly thirsty, and to make matters worse, class had been let out late because another kid had been rowdy. Cap initially cut in line, hoping to get a quick drink, but the teacher had seen him and kicked him out of the line. Angry at everyone, but especially the jerk who had gotten them held in for another five minutes, he decided to take his anger out.

    Cap found the student, who at the time was playing kickball in the grass, and without warning began beating on him. The other students split between attempting to help their friend and calling a nearby supervisor, but none of them were able to peel Cap off the prone body of the other student.

    ¡°I ended up suspended for two weeks, and I think the kid ended up in the hospital,¡± Cap admitted, ¡°During my time stuck at home, my mother had a serious discussion with me about how my dad was a bad person and I shouldn¡¯t try to be like him at all.¡±

    ¡°In the summer before middle school, my mother took me to a therapist, who helped me regain a sense of self-esteem and helped me see a reason to strive for greatness in my own life. By the time I enrolled in middle school, and met you, I had mostly improved my social skills to the point where I was able to have real friends.¡±

    ¡°However, just because I had the ability to talk to people normally again didn¡¯t mean that my father had gotten any better. In fact, it only seemed to get worse, and my mom wasn¡¯t particularly strong-willed. When he hurt her, she just stood there and took it, and when I would cry to her about when he hurt me, she just kept telling me that one of these days it would all be over.¡±

    He paused for a moment, trying to hold back tears. I decided to take that moment to synthesize what I had learned about him.

    His father was abusive, and his mother didn¡¯t have the willpower to stand up to him and throw him out. I had to agree with him that I didn¡¯t understand what that was like. While my parents were also weak, they didn¡¯t actively antagonize me like they did him. It was something I needed to know more about.

    ¡°What was your dad like before this?¡± I asked, ¡°I can¡¯t imagine your mother married him in spite of this personality of his.¡±

    ¡°Mom always told me he was a smooth talker,¡± he answered, ¡°She married him on a whim, thinking that he would be the answer for her in a tough time in her life. It didn¡¯t take him long to show his true colors after they were married, and when he started drinking it apparently got much worse.¡±

    From how he described it, she was probably tricked by him, and it was very possible that it was intentional on his part. I gritted my teeth, wondering what kind of human trash would deliberately trick a struggling young woman into being his wife, then beat her and their son.The story has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the violation.

    ¡°His constant anger toward us led to a lot of pent-up rage in me. I had to control myself as best as I could in school, but it became difficult to hold it all in. So I decided I would use the easiest target as an outlet, since my reputation wouldn¡¯t suffer if I harassed the source of everyone¡¯s disdain.¡±

    ¡°Let me guess,¡± I snarked, ¡°That was me.¡±

    Cap nodded.

    ¡°I never particularly hated you, and you seemed like a good enough person, but constantly picking on you made it easy for me to cope with the difficulty at home, and others wouldn¡¯t look down on me if I took my anger out on the kid with the creepy eyes.¡±

    ¡°Always my eyes,¡± I muttered.

    ¡°Sorry, nothing you could do about that one,¡± he chuckled.

    ¡°Yeah, yeah.¡±

    ¡°Anyway, I did keep up those meetings with my therapist throughout middle school, and you were always one of the topics that came up.¡±

    ¡°Really?¡± I replied, unsure whether to be surprised or not.

    ¡°Despite using you as an outlet, I never particularly enjoyed picking on you. It felt like I was going against everything my mom wanted from me, and there were times I actually couldn¡¯t bring myself to do it at all, particularly when Dad was better behaved than usual.¡±

    ¡°Why are your parents divorcing now, though?¡± I asked, ¡°It sounds like your father¡¯s been terrible ever since you were born. It¡¯s been a long time.¡±

    ¡°I think my mom finally realized that she had the power to do it,¡± Cap guessed, ¡°Despite all the years she spent under my dad¡¯s foot, in the legal system she is on equal standing. All she needed was the courage to actually do it.¡±

    ¡°Early in high school, I convinced her to come to my therapist for a session of her own. While normally you wouldn¡¯t take a teenager and his parent to the same therapist, I figured it would be easier since my therapist was already up to speed with my situation, and I was hoping she would do the same with my mother. This last summer, my mom finally decided to pull the plug on the marriage, something that made me very happy.¡±

    ¡°I can imagine.¡±

    ¡°Unfortunately, they decided that mornings during the week were best for divorce proceedings. They needed me to come in today to testify, so I had to miss class. I don¡¯t know how it got out, but it¡¯s clear that the rumor went in some unexpected and uncomfortable directions.¡±

    ¡°Can¡¯t say you¡¯re wrong.¡±

    ¡°You know, you could at least show a bit of sympathy for me, Ret,¡± Cap complained, ¡°I just told a heart-wrenching story of trials and hardship, and you¡¯re just sitting there, same as when you started.¡±

    The truth was, I was plenty sympathetic toward Cap. I could only imagine how hard it would have been to grow up in a household where one parent loves you and one parent beats you senseless. In particular, I felt a great sympathy toward Cap¡¯s mother, who had to deal with declining mental stability for almost twenty years due to her husband, while basically single-handedly raising their son at the same time.

    ¡°I¡¯m not heartless,¡± I defended, ¡°I just have a good poker face.¡±

    ¡°Sure, sure,¡± he playfully poked.

    After that, silence descended upon the room, and I decided to consult my thoughts about the situation as a whole. If anything changed because of this conversation, it was a newfound admiration I¡¯d gained for Cap¡¯s strength of mind. After dealing with what he had to for his entire life, he found it in him not only to recover from his early childhood aggression, but he took it upon himself to lead his mother down a path to recovery and a path toward a better life for the both of them.

    ¡°Why did you decide to approach me this year?¡± I asked, ¡°If your mother started feeling better a year ago, why this year?¡±

    ¡°The divorce was the turning point,¡± Cap admitted, ¡°I didn¡¯t need you as an outlet anymore, and I felt bad for all the time I had spent badgering you for years. I also thought you seemed pretty interesting, and if we had a chance to get to know each other you might be a good friend.¡±

    ¡°I¡¯m surprised you saw me and thought ¡®good friend¡¯, I commented jokingly, ¡°I¡¯m not exactly the most socially conscious person there is, you know.¡±

    ¡°You¡¯re not wrong about that,¡± Cap laughed, ¡°But you have potential. I think you¡¯re more empathetic than you think.¡±

    ¡°That sounds more like Iris than me.¡±

    ¡°Iris might be quite skilled at that, but I think you are too. At least, you can be.¡±

    ¡°Not sure when you got so talented at reading people,¡± I joked, ¡°But I¡¯m still doubtful.¡±

    ¡°That¡¯s fine, you¡¯ll figure it out,¡± Cap encouraged.

    I let out a large sigh, trying to reconcile everything that had happened in my mind. As I did that, I had to consider another question: where we would go from here. While I had held onto my doubts about Cap¡¯s intentions for weeks at this point, I was almost to the point where I could no longer deny that they were completely genuine. While I was wondering if this was an elaborate prank he had put on, after learning about his past I could no longer truly expect that to be the case. Cap was a better person now than he was then, that was all I could say.

    ¡°Do you still want to be my friend, Cap?¡± I asked, ¡°If you want to go back to how it was before, now¡¯s the last chance you have to say so.¡±

    ¡°Are you still asking that question, Ret?¡± he shot back, ¡°I¡¯ve been telling you the answer for two months now.¡±

    ¡°It¡¯s just that I don¡¯t understand what it is to be a friend. I¡¯m probably going to be quite lousy if I say yes, so now¡¯s your chance to back out before you get hurt.¡±

    ¡°Well, I¡¯ll keep that in mind, but my answer¡¯s set,¡± he declared, making eye contact with me.

    I could see pure determination in his eyes, and I was no longer able to avoid the truth. I had to come to terms with where we stood. If Cap was going to move on from our past, that put the onus on me to do the same.

    Thus, I held out my hand.

    ¡°I can¡¯t say I¡¯ll be your friend overnight, but I think I¡¯m ready to move on,¡± I confessed, ¡°Let¡¯s try being friends for once.¡±

    His smile stayed stationary, but he took my hand.

    ¡°I hoped you¡¯d say that,¡± He returned, ¡°I¡¯m hoping for a long and productive relationship.¡±

    ¡°Don¡¯t make it sound like a business contract,¡± I criticized, ¡°I don¡¯t know much about this stuff, but I get the impression that it¡¯s not like that.¡±

    ¡°You¡¯d be right, Ret,¡± he agreed, ¡°But I think you¡¯re the one trying too hard to think of this as businesslike.¡±

    It was possible he was right, but I didn¡¯t exactly want to dwell on that anymore. For once, I was going to move on from my past torment, and I didn¡¯t want anyone ruining the moment, not even myself.

    ¡°Also, one more question,¡± Cap requested, ¡°Can you officially forgive me for all the crap I put you through in middle school?¡±

    ¡°Why do you need me to?¡± I asked, confused, ¡°Isn¡¯t this enough?¡±

    ¡°Peace of mind more than anything,¡± he explained, ¡°I¡¯d prefer not to have anything to worry about.¡±

    ¡°All right,¡± I stated, ¡°I forgive you for your past. Just don¡¯t do it again.¡±

    He nodded.

    ¡°That¡¯s not who I am anymore.¡±

    ¡°Also, your dad¡¯s gone, now, right?¡± I prodded.

    ¡°That, too, but it¡¯s no excuse.¡±

    At that point, I realized how late it had gotten. For whatever reason, I had left all my homework for the evening, and now it was far past dinner with no progress.

    ¡°Can I ask a favor?¡± I asked upon this realization.

    ¡°What¡¯s that, Ret?¡± he replied immediately.

    ¡°Can you drive me home?¡±

 IX - A New Day, A New Friend

    Somehow, I was able to complete all my homework the previous night, though it involved sacrificing a significant amount of sleep. Still, I didn¡¯t regret my trip to Cap¡¯s house. In spite of all my worries about Cap, simply accepting his desire to be friends had taken a mental load off my back, and waking up was the most painless it had been in years.

    Of course, my mother was the first to notice how relaxed I seemed. When I was preparing to leave, she came over to speak with me.

    ¡°Retter, have a good day, okay?¡± she expressed.

    ¡°Hm?¡± I let out, turning to her, ¡°Oh, okay. I¡¯ll try.¡±

    I saw her blink for a moment, then smile.

    ¡°You seem to be feeling good today,¡± she observed, ¡°Did something happen?¡±

    ¡°What do you mean? I don¡¯t think I¡¯m any different than usual.¡±

    ¡°No, no, I think you¡¯re a little more relaxed. Your responses are coming across a little differently than usual.¡±

    I shrugged.

    ¡°Guess I slept pretty well last night.¡±

    The smile fell from her face, replacing itself with a suspicious look.

    ¡°Are you telling the truth?¡± she probed, ¡°You were up pretty late. I don¡¯t think you got much sleep.¡±

    ¡°That¡¯s true, but quality and quantity aren¡¯t necessarily correlated, especially where sleep is concerned,¡± I explained.

    While her face still seemed like she knew something wasn¡¯t right, she backed off at that point.

    ¡°Well, have a good day!¡±

    ¡°Yeah, yeah, you said that already,¡± I muttered, before making my way to the bus stop.

    To my surprise, though, when I arrived at school, Cap wasn¡¯t there. I had assumed based on what we talked about yesterday that he only needed to testify for one day, but was that really the case?

    I noticed that the rumors were still in full force, as well. Oh well, I considered, deciding not to pay attention to them. While I still needed to do something about them, I was in too good a mood to let myself get distracted.

    While Cap didn¡¯t show up to first period, Miles was present, and whenever I looked at him, I could see that something wasn¡¯t quite right. I wasn¡¯t sure why, but there was almost a sadness baked into his eyes that I had never seen before in him. He was clearly shaken from our confrontation yesterday, but I had no idea to what extent that was the case. It was possible he was simply putting up a front so Cap would take pity on him, or maybe he really was hurting. Either way, I knew I had to keep my distance if I wanted to keep my face intact.

    Thankfully, in spite of my earlier worries, Cap did show up to school that day. He arrived midway through fourth period, which, while unlike him, did signal that he was gone for a different reason than yesterday, or at the very least that his role was done more quickly than before.

    In fact, at lunch, he surprised me again.

    ¡°Hey, Ret, where are you going?¡± I heard him call as I left the classroom.

    I turned around, seeing him standing near my desk.

    ¡°What¡¯s up?¡± I asked, confused.

    This was the first time he had outwardly approached me in the classroom, so I was left somewhat lost for words.

    ¡°Let¡¯s walk to lunch together,¡± he proposed.

    I considered turning him down for a moment, but I figured that after what I¡¯d said last night, I owed him that much. I nodded and signaled that I would wait in the hall.

    After a moment where I could hear Cap waving off his other friends, he emerged from the classroom.

    ¡°Let¡¯s go, Ret,¡± he beckoned.

    As we started walking, I decided to try and start a conversation.

    ¡°You know, there¡¯s something strange about walking to lunch with you,¡± I commented.

    ¡°Really?¡± he deadpanned, ¡°That¡¯s the best you can do? That both came across kinda forced, and hurt a bit.¡±

    ¡°You know what I mean, though, right?¡± I asked, trying to forget about my clumsy mistake, ¡°We¡¯ve never really done this before.¡±

    ¡°I suppose that¡¯s true,¡± he said, ¡°But still, phrasing.¡±

    ¡°Sorry, sorry,¡± I apologized, hanging my head.

    We kept walking for a little longer, not talking anymore after my failed attempt at small talk. Once we reached the bench where we normally sat, Iris, who was already there, took immediate notice of what was happening.

    ¡°What¡¯s going on?¡± she asked, appearing unsettled, ¡°Why are you two walking to lunch together?¡±

    ¡°We¡¯re friends now,¡± Cap proudly declared.

    I rolled my eyes at his enthusiasm, but nodded my head.

    ¡°He¡¯s right,¡± I murmured, ¡°We worked out something yesterday.¡±

    A smile crept onto Iris¡¯ face at this.

    ¡°I¡¯m glad to hear that,¡± she said, ¡°At this rate I was wondering if our little group would fall apart.¡±

    ¡°No, that was just me being a dumbass,¡± I claimed.

    ¡°What do you mean?¡± Cap asked, out of the loop.

    ¡°Don¡¯t worry about it,¡± Iris waved off, ¡°Ret just said something dumb yesterday, that¡¯s all.¡±This book''s true home is on another platform. Check it out there for the real experience.

    ¡°Oh, now this I have to hear,¡± Cap requested, smiling.

    ¡°No, no, don¡¯t worry about it,¡± Iris denied, ¡°That¡¯s very clearly in the past, if our prior conversation is anything to go by.¡±

    Cap sat back, unsatisfied.

    ¡°As much as I hate to give up on this thread, I¡¯ll do the polite thing and stop pestering Ret on this.¡±

    ¡°Thank you,¡± I grunted, unimpressed.

    ¡°Take it as a sign of my goodwill,¡± Cap responded, winking.

    I shuddered, uncomfortable with Cap¡¯s overfamiliarity, even after deciding to put up with it for the time being. I wasn¡¯t sure if I¡¯d ever get used to some of his mannerisms, but I had to put up with them for the time being.

    ¡°I¡¯ve been meaning to ask,¡± I addressed Cap, ¡°Where were you this morning? You showed up to class late.¡±

    ¡°I thought I told you what was going on,¡± Cap replied, confused.

    ¡°Wait, what¡¯s going on?¡± Iris asked, ¡°I¡¯m out of the loop.¡±

    Cap took the next several minutes giving an abridged version of we had talked about the previous night, focusing on the divorce case that had caused him to miss the previous day.

    ¡°So that¡¯s why,¡± Iris murmured following Cap¡¯s explanation.

    ¡°Huh?¡± we simultaneously let out.

    ¡°I was wondering why Cap had always been picking a fight with you, at least by your own words,¡± Iris pondered, ¡°But if it was tied to his childhood abuse, it suddenly makes sense.¡±

    ¡°Seems that way,¡± I commented, ¡°So, Cap, what was going on this morning? More divorce proceedings?¡±

    He nodded.

    ¡°I wasn¡¯t needed for much today, so I didn¡¯t have to miss the entire day. But it still wasn¡¯t fun, and knowing people are spreading rumors about it doesn¡¯t help at all.¡±

    ¡°That¡¯s right,¡± Iris agreed, ¡°They haven¡¯t let up, even after a day.¡±

    ¡°While they¡¯ll probably die within the next week or so, it could leave permanent stains on our reputations,¡± I guessed, ¡°Or, at least on yours. Mine¡¯s already in the dumpster.¡±

    ¡°Maybe we should work on fixing that, too,¡± Cap said.

    ¡°It¡¯s not like I care,¡± I shrugged, ¡°But I imagine you two would have some problems with lies going around.¡±

    ¡°If I wanted to be popular, I wouldn¡¯t have chosen this seat a month ago,¡± Iris immediately replied, ¡°But it does hurt a bit to listen to them, and I can¡¯t stand malicious lies.¡±

    ¡°I¡¯m not sure anyone likes lies,¡± Cap added, ¡°But she¡¯s right that this isn¡¯t a pleasant experience, even if we can handle the results. I might lose a couple friends because of this, though, so I¡¯d like to fix it if possible.¡±

    ¡°You¡¯ve already lost one, Cap,¡± I pointed out, referring to Miles.

    ¡°Don¡¯t remind me,¡± Cap cringed, his face tightening, ¡°It wasn¡¯t easy for me to cut him off, and I¡¯m still wondering if it was the right choice.¡±

    ¡°You¡¯ll probably never know,¡± I stated, ¡°Life isn¡¯t that cut-and-dry.¡±

    ¡°I don¡¯t think there was a ¡®right¡¯ choice in that scenario,¡± Iris considered, ¡°Just try to be content with the one you made.¡±

    Cap hesitated, before nodding.

    ¡°That¡¯s fair, I suppose,¡± he concluded.

    We talked a little longer, but lunch ended soon afterward and not much of substance was exchanged during that time. As we split, I noticed that something was bothering me after that last conversation we¡¯d had, and I needed to talk to somebody about it. I figured the best person for that was my mentor, and I decided I would head to his office after school.

    Once classes ended, I made good on my decision. On my way there, however, I saw a child-sized bullet pass my leg. I turned around, only to see Mr. MacArthur in hot pursuit.

    ¡°Get back here, you little rascal!¡± he shouted, though I could see a hint of a smile on his face.

    ¡°You sooze, you lose, Daddy!¡± the child yelled back.

    ¡°It¡¯s snooze,¡± I interrupted, ¡°You gotta learn your n¡¯s, Gibson!¡±

    Not realizing my trap, the kid turned around to look at me, which allowed the now tired teacher to catch up to him and promptly pick him up.

    ¡°Gotcha,¡± he smirked.

    ¡°Daddy, you cheated!¡± Gibson complained, ¡°You¡¯re a cheater!¡±

    ¡°Gibby, there¡¯s a difference between bending the rules, and breaking the rules,¡± he instructed.

    Walking back over to me, I couldn¡¯t help but smile a little at the display.

    ¡°Are you sure that¡¯s the kind of thing you should be telling someone his age?¡± I snarked, ¡°That could easily backfire on you.¡±

    ¡°You¡¯ll understand when you¡¯re a parent, Retter,¡± he laughed, ¡°Thanks for the help, by the way.¡±

    ¡°Where did he learn a phrase like, ¡®you snooze, you lose¡¯ anyway?¡±

    ¡°I may have gotten a little too excited when playing games with him once, and now it¡¯s all he says,¡± he complained, ¡°You know that¡¯s rude, right, Gibby?¡±

    Gibson shook his head.

    ¡°You lost, Daddy.¡±

    ¡°You should know not to reason with kids like him,¡± I said, ¡°They only understand a few concepts: winning, losing, eating, sleeping, and pooping.¡±

    Mr. MacArthur laughed a bit nervously at my blunt statement.

    ¡°So, what brings you here today, Retter?¡±

    ¡°It¡¯s a long story,¡± I confessed, ¡°But something¡¯s bothering me a bit.¡±

    ¡°Come on inside, then,¡± Mr. MacArthur beckoned, ¡°But could you do me a favor?¡±

    ¡°Sure thing,¡± I accepted.

    I didn¡¯t realize it, but that ¡®favor¡¯ involved letting Gibson sit on my lap for the duration of our talk. I understood that it could be seen as ¡®payment¡¯, but it was going to be distracting to have to deal with a hyperactive toddler when trying to discuss matters of the mind.

    ¡°So what¡¯s the problem, then?¡± the teacher started.

    ¡°Well, I¡¯ve finally decided to accept Cap as a friend, but something¡¯s been bothering me a bit.¡±

    ¡°I¡¯m glad to hear that you¡¯ve made some progress,¡± he praised.

    I nodded, my chin hitting Gibson¡¯s shoulder in the process.

    ¡°I just feel like I haven¡¯t done anything to deserve his friendship. He¡¯s been really nice to me recently, and I owe him after he saved me from a tough situation yesterday, but it feels like this isn¡¯t a two-way friendship.¡±

    He nodded slowly, breaking eye contact as he pondered what I was saying.

    ¡°It¡¯s refreshing to hear you talk about friendship like you want to participate in it, for one thing,¡± he commented, ¡°And I think there¡¯s a simple solution to the problem you¡¯re facing right now.¡±

    ¡°What is that?¡± I asked, surprised to hear it, ¡°I can¡¯t think of anything.¡±

    ¡°Help him solve a problem.¡±

    ¡°Huh?¡±

    ¡°Do you know if there is anything bothering him right now?¡± Mr. MacArthur asked, ¡°Because if so, you could go ahead and help him fix it.¡±

    I debated whether or not to tell him about the rumors that have been going around. If I was careless with what I told him, it could result in things getting worse for our group, not better. But if I didn¡¯t tell him, I¡¯d end up going nowhere fast.

    ¡°There have been some negative rumors going around about him. I don¡¯t know all the details, but he hasn¡¯t exactly been comfortable with them, that¡¯s for sure.¡±

    ¡°That could work,¡± he offered.

    ¡°But how am I supposed to dispel those rumors?¡± I asked, ¡°I don¡¯t have a lot of credibility inside the grade, and some of the rumors involve me, giving me a vested interest in discrediting them.¡±

    The response I got surprised me. But not because it didn¡¯t make sense, or because it was obvious. The surprise is that it didn¡¯t come from Mr. MacArthur at all, but the ball of energy sitting on my lap.

    ¡°Just yell at them,¡± Gibson said.

    ¡°What?¡± I asked, shocked.

    Looking across the desk, I could see Mr. MacArthur¡¯s eyes widen, before he waved his arms out.

    ¡°Gibby, please don¡¯t interrupt.¡±

    ¡°I yell when I¡¯m mad,¡± he continued, ¡°So yell at them.¡±

    ¡°Gibson!¡±

    Mr. MacArthur grabbed Gibson off my lap, and sat him in a chair nearby.

    ¡°I¡¯m sorry, Retter,¡± he said, ¡°Can you come back another time? I need to have a talk with Gibby here.¡±

    I nodded, understanding what was going on.

    ¡°Thank you for your time,¡± I offered, before leaving the office.

    I hesitated while making my way toward the door, looking around to make sure nobody was following me. While normally I wouldn¡¯t bother with this sort of due-diligence, after the altercation the previous day, I was more than a little paranoid. I was worried that Miles could come out of nowhere and attack me again, and this time he would have even more reason. After all, his closest friend had outright rejected him in favor of me, and if this morning was any indication, it was still weighing heavily on him.

    Thinking about my conversation with Mr. MacArthur, I had to admit that he had brought up a good point when it came to returning the favors Cap has done for me. If I was going to make myself worthy of being Cap¡¯s friend, I had to do something about those rumors. However, my conversation with Mr. MacArthur had not borne much fruit because Gibson decided that it was the perfect time to interrupt midway through the discussion. While I was definitely fond of that kid, he let me down this time, leaving me to try and decipher the solution to this puzzle myself.

    Thankfully, I made it to the bus without incident this time, and by the time I got home I realized that I would once again have a normal evening of homework and self-reflection. But I was beginning to realize that ¡®normal¡¯ was going to have a new meaning in the near future, and while it scared me plenty, I was also beginning to feel a grain of excitement wondering what the future had in store for me.

 X - Standing Together

    Even though I didn¡¯t end up in a fight the previous day, waking up in the morning was somehow tougher than it had been the previous night. Whether it was the stress of the rumors finally catching up with me, or the frustrating lack of answers to my predicament, it didn¡¯t change the fact that I woke up much more outwardly irritable than usual. It was unlikely anyone at school would notice the difference due to my usual demeanor, but I was not looking forward to the look my mother would give me before I departed the house.

    I took a look at myself in the mirror before heading downstairs, and was somewhat disturbed by what I saw. While it isn¡¯t unusual for people with little sleep to have black circles develop under their eyes, the level of darkness present in my face coupled with my red eyes had me creeped out, and subsequently wondering if people had been looking at this for the past few days, and I simply hadn¡¯t noticed what was going on. Out of a twisted courtesy for those around me, I grabbed a pair of sunglasses and threw them on before I left.

    However, as I feared, I ran into my mother on my way down the stairs, and she immediately seemed concerned at my appearance.

    ¡°Retter? What¡¯s with the sunglasses?¡± she questioned.

    I lifted them up a bit.

    ¡°I don¡¯t want anyone thinking I¡¯m the reincarnation of Frankenstein¡¯s monster, now do I?¡± I sharply replied.

    My mother winced at my tone.

    ¡°Retter, is something wrong?¡±

    Realizing this conversation was going nowhere, I lowered my sunglasses and closed my eyes.

    ¡°Nothing in particular.¡±

    ¡°Are you sure?¡± she checked.

    ¡°I¡¯m going,¡± I declared, before quickly exiting the building.

    Of course, my denial was completely false, but the last thing I wanted to do was rely on my mother for advice. However, a fight with her was the last thing I needed at the time, since school was beginning in only an hour. Thus, I decided it would be best to retreat while I still had some level of self-control.

    Unfortunately, the day would bring more irritants on top of what I had to deal with in the morning. While I was expecting to navigate a wave of whispers about my choice in apparel, I wasn¡¯t ready for how intense the rumor mill would be surrounding it.

    ¡°Do you thing he¡¯s snapped?¡± One girl asked as I walked toward my first class.

    ¡°Maybe he¡¯s finally realized how much of a creep he is,¡± the other whispered back, just within earshot.

    I rolled my eyes, but it didn¡¯t change the light sting I felt at those words. I hadn¡¯t done anything to anyone to deserve that kind of treatment, and yet here I was being slandered for the great sin of covering up the one thing that people hated me for. What irony.

    It didn¡¯t help that, like yesterday, Cap was absent in the morning. If he was here, he would be taking up the attention of some of the class, and thus take their focus off me. That was how I had gotten used to living prior to his family problems taking center stage, and the twisting that had caused once it reached the student body.

    Speaking of which, that was another direction the sunglasses rumors went, as well.

    ¡°Is he trying to go undercover?¡± One of the students in question asked, ¡°Make us forget about what he¡¯s been doing to Cap?¡±

    ¡°Cap¡¯s gotten in a lot of trouble, and yet keeps talking to him,¡± a friend replied, ¡°Must be some kind of blackmail.¡±

    ¡°Why else would he be paying attention to someone like that?¡± A third chimed in.

    I shook my head, keeping my head down. I had my reasons for the sunglasses, even if they were a little eccentric. Cap was not a part of it.

    When I headed to lunch, Iris was the only one there, as expected. Unlike the previous day, Cap had not showed up by lunch, leaving the two of us alone.

    ¡°What¡¯s with the new look?¡± Iris questioned.

    I raised my sunglasses, showing her my eyes.

    ¡°Do you see anything different?¡±

    She tilted her head, thinking for a moment.

    ¡°Can¡¯t say I do,¡± she pondered, ¡°Is there some reason you¡¯re hiding your eyes, then?¡±

    ¡°Can¡¯t deny your advanced perceptive skills,¡± I commented, ¡°Don¡¯t worry about it. Something was bothering me about my eyes this morning, that¡¯s all.¡±

    ¡°I¡¯m curious, though,¡± she complained, ¡°You sure?¡±

    I nodded in slight exasperation. I really didn¡¯t want to talk about my eyes at that moment, especially after all the gossip I heard that morning.

    She sighed.

    ¡°Well, all right then,¡± she conceded, ¡°Where¡¯s Cap?¡±

    ¡°Beats me,¡± I replied, ¡°Probably dealing with more divorce proceedings.¡±

    ¡°Sounds horrible, I can¡¯t imagine the pain he¡¯s going through.¡±

    ¡°Maybe somewhere,¡± I considered, ¡°But I think part of him is happy, too.¡±

    ¡°What do you mean?¡± She asked.

    ¡°Based on what he¡¯s told me, his father was quite abusive. If they¡¯re cutting him off from their family, it means he doesn¡¯t have to live with that abuse anymore. That¡¯s good, right?¡±

    She didn¡¯t respond immediately. Instead, she looked at her feet in shame.

    ¡°I guess you¡¯re right, but I can¡¯t imagine cutting my dad off from the family. He¡¯s a critical part of it.¡±

    ¡°That¡¯s true for you,¡± I pointed out, ¡°You¡¯re dad¡¯s the only one you have left.¡±

    ¡°Even if that weren¡¯t the case,¡± she protested, ¡°Losing a parent is painful for any reason. After all, they¡¯re the reason you¡¯re alive.¡±

    I declined to answer at that point. I figured it would be best to agree to disagree, and I didn¡¯t want to overstep my bounds without Cap here to rebuke me for it. It didn¡¯t seem like Iris was going to complain about my decision, either, so we sat in silence for several minutes, left to our own minds. Eventually, however, Iris decided to focus on a different, more pressing topic.This story is posted elsewhere by the author. Help them out by reading the authentic version.

    ¡°So, about those rumors,¡± she began, ¡°Have you found a way to deal with them yet?¡±

    I shook my head.

    ¡°Unfortunately, no. I did try to talk to Mr. MacArthur about it, but Gibson was too hyper and made it impossible to make any real progress.¡±

    ¡°Gibson?¡±

    ¡°His son. I think he¡¯s three or four, but I need to double check. He¡¯s a good kid, but sometimes a little too energetic for his own good,¡± I explained.

    ¡°Well, what was he doing?¡±

    ¡°He was running around before I got there. I¡¯m not sure Mr. MacArthur would have caught him if I hadn¡¯t been there. Evidently, when we went into his office, the kid kept interrupting us, saying I should just yell if we were upset, like he would.¡±

    ¡°Yell, huh?¡± Iris contemplated.

    ¡°Yeah, that¡¯s kinda out of the question, though,¡± I shook my head, ¡°My reputation is already tenuous, I don¡¯t need to be immature on top of that.¡±

    ¡°I guess you¡¯re right,¡± Iris agreed, ¡°Still, I wonder about whether he has a point.¡±

    ¡°Maybe, but I don¡¯t want it to backfire.¡±

    In truth, I had brushed off Gibson pretty quickly, but it was possible he had half a point. Maybe me going crazy would get people¡¯s minds off Cap and onto me. Still, it was a little too messy for me. I didn¡¯t want to simply shift the rumor mill, I wanted to wreck it. If I was going to do that, the last thing I would want to do is put myself under even greater scrutiny.

    ¡°We know the truth, it¡¯s just an issue of spreading it,¡± I thought out loud, ¡°How would we do that?¡±

    ¡°We could spread a conflicting rumor,¡± Iris offered, ¡°If two rumors contradict each other, they both tend to fall apart.¡±

    ¡°That or the stronger rumor simply becomes more pronounced,¡± I rejected, ¡°If they find out we¡¯re the origin, it could reinforce their bias rather than remove it.¡±

    ¡°Well, then what are we supposed to do?¡± Iris asked no one in particular.

    I furrowed my brow, attempting to think of something that would allow us to escape the situation we had found ourselves in. However, no matter what I came up with, everything seemed hopeless. Mess up even a little bit, and the operation will backfire. That seemed to be the case with every possible solution. If we wanted to fix this, we would have to walk a tightrope suspended above a pit of lava.

    ¡°We¡¯re going to need to take some kind of risk,¡± I responded to her previous query.

    ¡°I think you¡¯re right,¡± she agreed, ¡°But what will we do?¡±

    ¡°For now, I think we should wait for Cap,¡± I proposed, ¡°I don¡¯t want to do too much without him. His reputation is on the line as much as ours.¡±

    ¡°Sounds good,¡± Iris acquiesced.

    We headed back to class at the ten-minute bell, as usual, but my brain was left right in the same place it was when lunch began. I was stuck trying to fix the problems I had been trying to fix for a week, and I wasn¡¯t really getting anywhere in spite of what I¡¯d learned.

    ¡°Hey, why is Cap missing again today?¡± I heard a nearby peer whisper to a friend.

    ¡°I think he¡¯s stuck in court again,¡± his friend responded.

    I started tapping my pencil, trying to rein in my frustration. I was getting sick and tired of hearing all these nobodies talk like they knew Cap. And it wasn¡¯t just them. I could hear similar whispers coming from all over the classroom.

    ¡°Seriously? Again? What did he do?¡±

    ¡°Who knows, but I think it has to be something criminal.¡±

    My left fist began to clench, while my pencil was tapping the desk faster. I didn¡¯t want to hear it, but I couldn¡¯t escape it. They were accusing Cap of terrible things when he did nothing wrong.

    ¡°The golden boy, a criminal, huh?¡±

    Even though I was trying my hardest to keep myself under control, I was beginning to hear only one thing in my mind.

    ¡°Just yell at them.¡±

    I shut my eyes, shaking my head slightly so as not to tip off anyone else that something was wrong. But all I could hear was that one phrase, the phrase that came from the lips of a preschooler.

    ¡°I yell when I¡¯m mad. So yell at them.¡±

    What was wrong with me? Why was I only able to think of that? Yelling wouldn¡¯t solve anything at all.

    ¡°Man, remind me to stay away from Cap and that red-eyed kid. Who knew they were actually bad news?¡±

    That was it.

    I stood up quickly, my feet hitting the floor in a noise that could only be considered a stomp. At the same time, my hands slammed my desk, getting everyone¡¯s attention. I looked up, and exhaled.

    If I couldn¡¯t control myself, at least I should make what I did yell the truth. I wasn¡¯t going to let them slander my friend any longer.

    ¡°Listen here, assholes,¡± I announced, taking off my sunglasses, ¡°Hate me all you want, but leave my friend out of this.¡±

    The class immediately started whispering.

    ¡°What¡¯s he talking about?¡±

    ¡°What¡¯s gotten into him?¡±

    ¡°Is he going to attack us?¡±

    I steeled myself, regaining a degree of control. I may have already been in too deep, but I was going to see this through. Even if it meant I would suffer, I was going to get my friend out from under the bus if it was the last thing I did.

    ¡°I¡¯m hearing a lot about Cap. That he¡¯s a criminal, or that he¡¯s being blackmailed, and I¡¯m sick of it,¡± I continued, ¡°Do any of you know what he¡¯s going through as we speak? Do you know what he¡¯s been through his entire life? Do you know anything about him? If not, you have no place to be making up lies.¡±

    ¡°What are you talking about?¡± A jock in the front corner stood up, ¡°You don¡¯t know any better than we do!¡±

    I wagged my finger.

    ¡°You¡¯re right. Which is why I¡¯m not going around spreading lies about him, and gossiping about unverified claims.¡±

    ¡°What do you mean, unverified?¡± A girl was the next to fight back, ¡°I¡¯ve heard from multiple people that-¡°

    ¡°And where, pray tell, did they hear it?¡± I replied, causing the girl to sit down, ¡°The truth is, it¡¯s all false. Cap is not a criminal. He is in court, but he¡¯s a witness, not a defendant. He¡¯s lived a tough life, and he¡¯s finally being freed from it. So why don¡¯t you help him recover and move forward, instead of acting like the gossip-obsessed sheep you all are?¡±

    With that, I sat down. While I wasn¡¯t proud that I lost my temper, I stood by everything I said, and would repeat it in a heartbeat if someone asked me to. Of course, no one did, as the classroom was completely silent. However, while many of them were looking at me in shock, as this was very out-of-the-ordinary for me, several students were turned around, looking at the doorway. I looked up, only to see a face I didn¡¯t expect.

    Cap was there, frozen at the door. When we locked eyes, I saw him crack a smile, and begin to clap. At this point, everyone turned around to look at the newcomer, who was beginning to walk toward the podium rather than his seat.

    ¡°Well said, friend,¡± Cap said, ¡°But I also have something to say. May I have the floor?¡±

    At a loss for words, I simply nodded, wondering what Cap had in store for us. Seeing my approval, he began his speech.

    ¡°The truth is, what Ret said is correct. I have been stuck in court for the last week or so, like the rumors say. However, I¡¯m dealing with an extremely personal issue, so please don¡¯t ask me about it.¡±

    The entire class remained silent after his request, but I had the feeling they were all feeling different things about the events that had transpired.

    ¡°I bet none of you really believed him though, did you?¡± he challenged, ¡°The truth is, you¡¯re all acting under the assumption that Ret is a bad person. He¡¯s a creep that wants to hurt you, right? He¡¯s just covering his own skin, right?¡±

    ¡°Well, no. I¡¯ve actually spoken to the boy with red eyes, and he¡¯s just like all of us. He has the ability to feel pain, and he does on a regular basis due to what you all say about him. He hides it well, sure, but I¡¯ve seen the look in his eyes when you slander him. Imagine if I slandered your friend, what they would look like. Now imagine if I did it so much they were used to it, and they believed it.¡±

    Unlike when I was speaking, Cap had a sense of authority and dignity, and no one dared interrupt him.

    ¡°I feel incredibly grateful that Ret stood up for me earlier, so I¡¯m going to make the same request. Please, try to understand who he is, and don¡¯t act like you¡¯re above that. Instead of pushing him down for your own self-satisfaction, why don¡¯t you help him become a better person?¡±

    ¡°You¡¯re one to talk,¡± the jock from earlier finally pitched, ¡°You were as bad as any of us six months ago.¡±

    ¡°You¡¯re right,¡± Cap admitted, ¡°And I won¡¯t lie. I feel bad for what I did. But my actions speak for themselves. I found myself in a better place. All of you can do that too, whenever you choose to do it. But, until then, leave my friend alone.¡±

    ¡°Ahem.¡±

    Cap turned, and saw the teacher in the doorway. Embarrassed, he returned to his seat after the long-winded speech, and the teacher, pretending nothing had happened, began the lesson with earnest.

    I, on the other hand, could not focus on the lesson. I could only think of Cap¡¯s incredible speech, spoken like a professional. It had to be spontaneous, but he sounded calm and collected without being monotone. I was shocked that he was capable of such skills.

    What was more surprising, though, was his willingness to throw away his own credibility for my sake. He, without any hesitation, confronted a whole class of high school students in order to help someone like me, who had done nothing for him.

    Wait, could it be...?

    I realized that this was what I was looking for. All this time, I had wondered what it meant to be friends with someone. None of the answers I had heard worked for me, but Cap had showed that he was willing to risk something for me, and I did the same for him. Not only that, I was confident that if Iris were in the same spot, neither of us would hesitate to do it again.

    ¡°So this is what I was looking for, huh? I guess I finally found it.¡±

 XI - The Red Team

    ¡°Well done.¡±

    It was the next morning, and we had all met for lunch as usual. Of course, word had spread about our little blow-up, and against all odds, the rumors stopped. Apparently all we needed to do was yell a little bit, just like Gibson suggested. That said, I didn¡¯t see myself listening to Gibson for advice in the future, in spite of the flash in the wisdom pan he provided.

    Iris, of course, was impressed with our little miracle, and no less grateful. We had basically cleared her name of being a slut, a rumor that I still didn¡¯t know the origin of. In addition, the three of us had gained a bit of notoriety as a proper ¡°friend group¡± on campus, and one that was not to be messed with.

    ¡°It was nothing,¡± I downplayed, ¡°It was against my better judgement, if anything.¡±

    Iris shook her head, not having my humility.

    ¡°Are you kidding? You stood up for your friend when he was being slandered by others. No way that¡¯s nothing.¡±

    ¡°Hey, wait a minute,¡± Cap interrupted, ¡°Are we just going to ignore that I did the same thing for him?¡±

    Iris smirked at him in response.

    ¡°What, jealous?¡±

    Cap shrugged, frowning.

    ¡°I don¡¯t know, it just feels like he¡¯s getting all the credit for a group effort.¡±

    ¡°Can we agree on a 60/40 split, then?¡± Iris proposed, ¡°He did start it. You probably wouldn¡¯t have jumped in yourself if he hadn¡¯t blown up first.¡±

    ¡°Blown up is right,¡± I murmured.

    ¡°Hush, you,¡± Iris scolded back, ¡°So, how about it?¡±

    ¡°Why can¡¯t we both just have 100 percent?¡± Cap responded, ¡°I mean, you¡¯re not wrong about me jumping in after he did, but it wouldn¡¯t have worked at all if I hadn¡¯t joined too.¡±

    ¡°I¡¯m starting to see how you barely passed math last year,¡± Iris deadpanned.

    ¡°Anyway,¡± I interjected, ¡°It doesn¡¯t matter to me who gets the credit. Let¡¯s move on.¡±

    The two of them looked at me for a moment, before acquiescing. We took another minute or so to eat, before Cap spoke up.

    ¡°So now that we¡¯re officially a group, we need a name.¡±

    I responded with a blank look.

    ¡°What?¡± Cap defended, ¡°It¡¯s not like we can just be called ¡®Cap¡¯s group¡¯ or ¡®Ret¡¯s group¡¯, right? We need a cool name that people can refer to us by.¡±

    ¡°Why, exactly?¡± I replied.

    ¡°Why not?¡± Iris said, ¡°Sounds fine to me.¡±

    Outvoted, I sighed and tried to think of a name. I wasn¡¯t the most creative person in the world, and in times like these it really came back to bite me. My mind was completely blank, and I found myself just zoning out until someone said something.

    ¡°Say, how about ¡®Team Ret¡¯?¡± Cap pitched.

    ¡°What?¡± I asked, snapping back to reality.

    ¡°¡®Team Ret¡¯,¡± Cap repeated, ¡°You¡¯re basically our leader, right? So we¡¯re your teammates.¡±

    ¡°Since when was I the leader?¡± I questioned, ¡°I thought we were just three people who ate together and talked.¡±

    ¡°I agree, I think Ret would be the leader,¡± Iris added, ¡°He¡¯s the one who started everything. He was the first person to sit here, he was the one who did the most work fixing the rumors initially, and he was the one who put the successful plan into action.¡±

    She wasn¡¯t wrong, but something felt off about taking the position of leader. I wasn¡¯t particularly skilled as a leader, and I lacked a lot of the qualities that would help me in that department. For one, Cap was far more outgoing than either of us, making him better if we had to discuss things with other groups on behalf of all of us. On the other hand, Iris was more composed, leading her to be a better peacemaker for the group when we were in fights. If we needed a leader at all, which I still doubted, one of them would be much more suited for the job.

    And yet, for whatever reason, when I looked at the confidence they had in their faces, I just couldn¡¯t say no. Maybe I was growing soft due to my growing acceptance of them as friends, but I didn¡¯t want to betray their trust.

    ¡°Fine, I¡¯ll be the leader,¡± I conceded, ¡°But my name won¡¯t be in the team name.¡±

    ¡°An effective compromise,¡± Iris noted.

    Cap was unhappy with the arrangement, but figured it was best not to push me right now considering my initial reluctance to even take the role of leader.

    ¡°How about ¡®Red Team¡¯?¡± Iris pitched in response to Cap¡¯s silence, ¡°It still references Ret, but not directly. And I think everyone will figure out the meaning pretty fast.¡±

    ¡°Please don¡¯t bring my eyes into this,¡± I pleaded.

    Iris shook her head.

    ¡°Those eyes aren¡¯t something to be ashamed of, Ret,¡± she lectured, ¡°I¡¯m sure there are plenty of people who want badges of honor like that.¡±

    ¡°Iris is right,¡± Cap finally spoke up, ¡°Your eyes are special, Ret.¡±

    ¡°You know what¡¯s happened to me because of these things?¡± I responded, ¡°I don¡¯t think anyone wants that.¡±If you spot this narrative on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.

    ¡°Let¡¯s change that attitude of yours, then,¡± Iris concluded, ¡°We¡¯ll be the ¡®Red Team¡¯.¡±

    ¡°I agree,¡± Cap added.

    Seeing I was outvoted, I hung my head. I wasn¡¯t looking forward to my red eyes being the subject of more talk in the school.

    Sure enough, it didn¡¯t take one class period to start hearing things. However, it was more direct than I imagined.

    ¡°So, Red-Eyes,¡± a voice approached after the next class ended, ¡°Is it true?¡±

    I looked up to see Judge, who had approached my desk with his eyes narrowed and arms crossed.

    ¡°I¡¯m not sure what ¡®it¡¯ is supposed to be, but if it¡¯s about my theoretical investment in an underground dog-fighting ring, I¡¯m sorry to say that it¡¯s full of crap.¡±

    Judge groaned, clearly exasperated with me.

    ¡°Why do I even bother,¡± I heard him murmur, before directly addressing me, ¡°Are you and Cap officially forming a ¡®Red Team¡¯ of some kind?¡±

    My eyebrows raised.

    ¡°Well, news spreads faster than I realized,¡± I admitted, ¡°That¡¯s nothing new, though. We just came up with a name for our lunch group. We thought ¡®Red Team¡¯ would be appropriate.¡±

    He closed his eyes, staying silent for a moment.

    ¡°You know, Red-Eyes?¡± he said, ¡°Thanks for fixing whatever was wrong with him.¡±

    I tilted my head, confused.

    ¡°You¡¯re welcome?¡± I asked, ¡°But why are you thanking me.¡±

    ¡°I told you before, he¡¯s my lab partner. It sucks to see him out of whack like that.¡±

    ¡°Didn¡¯t know you cared,¡± I snarked.

    His eyes widened, and his face turned red.

    ¡°No, no, it¡¯s just about my grades,¡± he sputtered, ¡°When he¡¯s not performing well, that reflects badly on me, you know?¡±

    It was my turn to widen my eyes. This was the first time in the two years I¡¯d known Judge that I¡¯d seen him on the defensive for whatever reason. I had clearly hit a touchy subject, but I couldn¡¯t quite tell why. After all, Judge always took pride in his status as number one at Northwest Creek, so it wouldn¡¯t be out of the ordinary to see Cap as a means to an end, to some extent. He had certainly seen me that way whenever we were forced to work together in class.

    ¡°Anyway, is that all?¡± I asked, standing up.

    Still slightly red, he nodded, before walking off. I noticed as he turned around that he was slouching more than usual, likely a result of discomfort when talking to me.

    For better or worse, that wasn¡¯t even the last time I got bugged about the new group name that day. After the final class, while I was gathering my things, another visitor came to my desk. I looked up to see that it was Viridia, the girl I had talked to when I was looking for friendship advice.

    ¡°Need something?¡± I asked, startling her.

    ¡°Uh, yeah,¡± she replied very quietly, ¡°But it can¡¯t look like I¡¯m being nice to you, okay?¡±

    I sighed, seeing where this was going.

    ¡°Do your worst,¡± I whispered back.

    I saw her straighten up, beginning to act out her role.

    ¡°Excuse me, Red-Eyes,¡± she haughtily commanded, ¡°Help me find something.¡±

    In the spur of the moment, I decided to challenge her a little.

    ¡°Why should I?¡± I shot, ¡°What did I do?¡±

    She didn¡¯t miss a beat, of course.

    ¡°You were the one who lost it, idiot,¡± she declared, ¡°So help me.¡±

    I looked around to see a number of disapproving glares toward my direction, and I decided at that point to ¡®give in¡¯.

    ¡°Fine, fine,¡± I conceded, ¡°I¡¯ll help you.¡±

    She nodded and smiled triumphantly. I followed her out the door, and we made our way down to the courtyard, where I normally sat for lunch.

    I sat on the bench, while she stood there.

    ¡°Quite a roundabout way to get me to talk to you, huh?¡± I commented.

    ¡°I told you, I don¡¯t hate you,¡± she insisted, ¡°But my friends do, and if I associate with you beyond what they consider acceptable, they¡¯ll dump me.¡±

    ¡°They don¡¯t sound like friends to me,¡± I replied.

    ¡°What do you know?¡± she looked away, turning a little red, ¡°It¡¯s not like you know what friendship is, either.¡±

    ¡°Actually,¡± I contradicted, ¡°I fixed that yesterday.¡±

    ¡°Really?¡± she asked, ¡°After the thing with Cap?¡±

    I nodded. She, on the other hand, blushed deeply.

    ¡°That was pretty cool, what he did,¡± she admitted.

    ¡°He?¡± I replied, before sensing the mood, ¡°Don¡¯t tell me-¡°

    ¡°No!¡± she immediately shouted, covering up my mouth, ¡°Don¡¯t say it!¡±

    I could tell she was about to break down, so I didn¡¯t push the line of questioning any more. Instead, I decided to ask what she wanted to hear, since she had been the one to approach me.

    ¡°I wanted to hear about this ¡®Red Team¡¯ that people are talking about,¡± she said, ¡°Is it true that you and Cap are both in it?¡±

    ¡°Yup,¡± I nodded, ¡°Me, Cap, and a girl named Iris. She¡¯s in our grade.¡±

    ¡°A girl, huh?¡± she murmured, looking away, ¡°Does Cap like her?¡±

    ¡°Seems like it,¡± I replied nonchalantly, failing to pick up on the hint, ¡°They get along pretty well. Why do you ask?¡±

    As a result of my failure, though, she began to tear up a little bit. I was confused in response. I didn¡¯t say anything particularly demoralizing, but she was responding quite negatively anyway.

    ¡°Are you okay?¡± I asked, waving my hand in front of her face.

    Her eyes widened, and she wiped her tears.

    ¡°I¡¯m sorry,¡± she apologized, ¡°Just had a moment there, you know?¡±

    I nodded.

    ¡°Anyway, I need to go,¡± I waved, ¡°I¡¯ll tell Cap you say hello.¡±

    Adding a smirk at the end, I could see her babbling in embarrassment as I made my way out of the courtyard.

    In spite of my callous attitude, I was beginning to feel a hint of pride around the growing acceptance of our little lunch group, While Miles had shown very outward resistance to the idea, everyone else had mostly left Cap alone about it, and now they were even taking it for granted that he interacted with me in a friendly way. Of course, nobody else besides Viridia had any interest in acting courteously around me, and even she could only do so out of sight of all of her friends. Still, it didn¡¯t change the recognition that I could only have dreamed of just a short year ago.

    Of course, I still needed to thank Mr. MacArthur for all his help through this process, so I decided after that to make my way toward his office. Unlike the other day, thankfully, Gibson was nowhere to be seen, and he was sitting in his office like usual.

    ¡°How are things going, Retter?¡± he asked me once I sat down.

    ¡°The rumors are dissipating,¡± I confirmed.

    ¡°I heard that you had quite the explosive speech yesterday,¡± he commented, ¡°Does it have anything to do with that?¡±

    I shrugged and nodded.

    ¡°I suppose. No reason it wouldn¡¯t be, given the timing.¡±

    ¡°And what¡¯s this ¡®Red Team¡¯ I¡¯ve been hearing students talking about this afternoon?¡±

    I blinked.

    ¡°I¡¯m surprised you¡¯ve already heard about it,¡± I mentioned, ¡°We only decided on the name at lunch today.¡±

    ¡°Retter, you should know better than anybody not to underestimate how fast rumors spread in this school.¡±

    I nodded.

    ¡°You¡¯re probably right. Anyway, ¡®Red Team¡¯ is simply our group¡¯s official name. They wanted to name it after me, but I forced them to compromise on something a bit more subtle, if uncomfortable for me.¡±

    ¡°I¡¯m impressed you were willing to compromise, Retter,¡± he praised, ¡°You really are changing.¡±

    ¡°I¡¯m not so sure about that.¡±

    I didn¡¯t really think anything had significantly changed other than the fact that I had friends now. It didn¡¯t really seem like I was doing anything differently than I used to outside of the circle, and I didn¡¯t really think that was a bad thing, either. I was who I was, and that wasn¡¯t going to change, right?

    ¡°Don¡¯t sell yourself short, okay?¡± Mr. MacArthur advised, ¡°You¡¯re capable of much more than you think.¡±

    ¡°Am I, now?¡± I smartly replied.

    ¡°There¡¯s no need for the attitude, Retter.¡±

    I shrugged, backing down for now.

    ¡°By the way, I want you to thank Gibson for me. It was his idea for me to yell at the class,¡± I requested.

    ¡°I¡¯m not sure that¡¯s something I want him hearing. Wouldn¡¯t do for him to think it¡¯s perfectly appropriate for high school kids to scream at their classmates all day long.¡±

    ¡°That¡¯s a toddler for you,¡± I commented, ¡°Anyway, thank you for your time, as always.¡±

    After that, I finally made my way home after what was a much more tumultuous day than I had previously expected. The thought of being a member of the newly formed Red Team, while foreign, put a smile on my face. I was moving into a new phase of my life, one that would hopefully be better than the last.