《A Man in the Gods' World》


 He Woke Up

    My name is James, that''s what people call me James, just James.


    Last Names were pretty annoying and no one refers to me by mine so I just go without them.


    My family is .. unimportant to this whole ''story'' rather a problem is a better word. In fact mentioning theem just makes this whole thing even worse was before.


    So let us talk about this problem. We begin on Sunday, September 21, 2021..


    I am in North America so it was neither too warm nor too cold early in the morning at least not for me others may say otherwise.


    It helped me sleep like a log and I woke up tried like everyone else who habitally goes to bed late at nights but refreshed. Today I never made much of plan for today except working after thinking about what once I got up so all was free game in my head. You see I never had much of a daily routine but even then normally questioning life wasn''t one of the things I did so early.


    I got out of bed and asked myself the question I''m still asking myself why I ever bothered to ask in the first.


    Why oh Why di that come to my head, "Why Am I, Human?"


    F*ck myself on doing this, I don''t believe ignorance is bliss or a sin but if I have to question my entire life early in the morning and my circumstances that brought to this point because of a sing question which also turned my life around then whatever sense that got me here be damned. Though all my logic and sense akready did get lost later on.


    This is Grim. What got me to ask this question in the first place?Was it me or was it well I won''t even ask if it was god so yeah it was probably me.


    I am skipping over a lot of things and already I''m ranting and raving and you''ve have yet to know who I am right.


    So I am James like I said the same one who asked that question, I spent my years like any most children, talked a lot, played with friends, studied, got ok grades, graduated, worked, etc, etc. I have a lot of pride in myself or rather I have quite the high ego. Mostly due to thinking I was some sort of god from my childhood days and my gross obsession with myself that I even have today.I''m preideful and I know thisI won''t be hurting myself for nor ill i bring this up again so you''ll have to deal with this. Back on topic now so why a kid who got ok grades, thought he was god (I don''t remember why you should care about this and it has escaped my mind when I''m writing this why I really did but It was ironic, yep definitely ironic) now ask life a question about life?Support the creativity of authors by visiting the original site for this novel and more.


    I don''t know but everything else after this point shook me. That whu I write about it.


    First of All the Initial Shock


    Jason woke up, after opening his eyes and taking in his sorrounding with one quick glance acorss the room he sat up pinching himself awake and rubbing his forehaead and eyes. He felt the urge to think about someting here.


    And he asked myself "Why was I Human?". What a weird question that was, he thought. It not usually the time for a life crisis but let''s see what I can make of this.


    I know I was the one to say it but why did I ask that? he thought while turning his palms back and forth. Staring at this repeated somewhat hypnotic action he thoughts further escalated down."You know why was I Human rather why was... no, what I am I..? no not that.. hmm.. I want to ask something but I just can''t find the words for it...". he thoughts here were muddy, a tesatment to the fact that he just woke up but they continously spiraled downwards even further as he began to think deeper about this and wake up. I don''t need a motive to continue this,it''s early in the morning and I am bored. Questions...Questions...hmm, Hey if I am ... Something is wrong why do I wake up every morning, when I go to sleep no why do I feel alive yet this is me, no something is wrong, I feel alive but I also feel divine like I could do anything but not anything, weird no that''s.. wrong it''s not like that... it''s like I am someone else but better no different yet here I am every da... Ah! I got it if I feel like a god but I am limited now what am I?. This chaos here was his thought porcess as he contemplated an abstract idea, unflitered that could be just unintelligent, uncomprehensable ot unknowable or all. "There life crisis solved," he said, Or not what am I even doing this early in the morning. it felt strsnge that feeling of getting closer to the answer and that when I did that feeling of how my thoguhts transformed afterwards.


    Once you see it you can''t unsee it or in this case unfeel it, huh, I still don''t know how to put this feeling in words.


    Whatever I am just tried. Back to sleep


    The First Shock was more like a mental breakdown and let me tell you the inital feeling was a new one but not an oh he is high one just a weird but kinda pleasant one like I got the answer right but I now know I got it wrong for most of my life.


    It felt like my body was misplaced like how this was how it actually was and all along I just had it wrong. It felt right but weird then it went to feeling something''s wrong but it still felt right.


    The Second Shock was the Big One but the First One was like a little shake I needed once and I''ll remember how it felt and it prepared me for everything else. Actually becuase I kept feeling it especially on nights or in the mornings. It was still there, the strangeness was there it was growing, distracting me and everything felt wrong and everything that happened tht as wrong felt right and I could FEELit.


    Oh how the psychiatrist had a field day on this.


    Oh and on that day I also learned, Ireally got to choose my words better.

 Into Work

    The Second Shock


    "Oh God that feels uncomfortable", Walking outside felt like hell with the constant feeling of wrongness and not belonging. some would normally skip today and stay inside but ... "Oh god it feels bad"... I have some practice with sucking it up and carrying on.


    Even if I felt like my soul was rejecting reality and trying to advocate from my body I still had work to go. Yeah, no matter if the world ended tomorrow we still have work to do, and if it is the last thing I do I will not miss today.


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    Now there was nothing special going on that day. Looking back now I noticed that I might have been a serious workaholic not that I changed but it''s pleasing to see myself following principles and a good reminder to always look back on my actions .


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    "Oh oh good, it gets worse! when I move" I screamed to the heavens. To clarify something I didn''t live in a snobby apartment so no one should have heard. Although of course, I stating this since someone did.


    "Are you ok?", my neighbor I never got to know asked. I mean I was planning to move and who cares about a person that ... cares about me. I really got to make it up to him.


    but of course, hearing someone''s voice just made the feeling all the more terrible. Honestly, what is going on with me, it wasn''t so bad yesterday. why today do I feel like I am being ejected out to outer space. It''s making my skin crawl, and my god is it just uncomfortable.


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    Wait now That I see this again I noticed it made me uncomfortable about every instead of being uncomfortable. This was a very important distinction now of course and it would have made everything so much easier to swallow and less confusing later on.


    A case of theft: this story is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.


    "No Yeah, I am fine", Of course, I am not fine but what am I suppose to say after he inevitably asks what''s wrong that I ''feel wrong?'' of course not.


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    It would have been better to consult him. Mr.Jackson the neighbor was a much better person to let me in on the truth than the others. He wasn''t judging and he had a nice way of explaining things.


    Then again I did learn everything quite quickly because of my ''decisions''. and it is not every day you make the right choice.


    Jason after having finally exited his apartment fully got his things and tried to hobble at the speed of lightning because the hobbling always works of course. It was inefficient though and it took about 30 minutes until he reached his car in the apartment garage after getting outside.


    Driving did help for a while but the faster he went the worse he felt so he drove very slowly to work that day getting to work almost on time but a little late. It was sufficient since no one called him out on it as he hoped. Since he was obsessed with work and all


    No, they were more paying attention to his desperate hobbling at work. He wasn''t actually hobbling that time since that would had him sent home but he was more or less trying to play off a mixture between walking slowly and staggering forward wile trying to looking ok and he ended up looking more like a patient that broke out of the hospital before complete recovery.


    It was embarrassing. Very Embarrassing.


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    The second shock happened at work as you might have guessed. This didn''t make the reveal any less awkward or good as it was not something that I found enjoyment having people see my faults or failures. I learned a lot from going back over this and I felt this was awasn''t as bad as thought it was at the time. Yeah though I know I am not going to get anything out of this what''s next. Though I should remind myself once again of that ''ignorance is not bliss'' while I have the time because I didn''t get the chance to last time.

 The Second Surprise

    "Gods this Start Sucks!" starting the day getting called in because others were worried over your health didn''t forecast a pleasant day. It was not a choice of mine on how I''d wanted to start a day. Jason grumbled as he moved with the gall of a soldier returning from the battlefield after leaving the manager''s office. It was a good fight he muttered to himself although he won in the end he thought as he rounded a counter.


    He was given the advice to return home for today but he adamantly refused and the worried looks from his co-workers got him called into the manager''s office to receive the order. But he fought against it and won though only because the other side wanted him working in the first place.


    I was suffering an unbelievable weirdness that seems to be creeping into my actions. So it''s understandable if they just got worried. Sighing to himself he moved to his own workspace at Section 3 out of the 4 sections with nothing to look forward to there but average and average, nothing exciting was here, no exceptional people, and life was the same. Despite the weirdness making that even more insufferable He reassured himself that all was fine and right as he moved over to his section past the door dividing the hallway that split into three other sections and the manager''s office. To find himself greeted by three others after entering through the door. Jason was already familiar with who It was and quickly noted how relaxed they were when he steps through even though he currently looked like a veteran who slept off of war for too long. They were waiting for me, he concluded quickly before smiling in greeting.


    "Hey, you okay," Paul one of the three, who were friends outside and good coworkers asked after scanning him and frowning. "you look like shit."


    "I don''t-" Jason was beginning to retort but he stopped himself after noticing the two others next to Paul nodding along. Do I look shit? I don''t think, I only hobbled to get here early and I checked myself on the way here to make sure that I only looked moderately bad, ahh it must be my poor attempts at moving at a speed that was between walking and sprinting just to get to the section after leaving or I hope it is. Walking got messed up along the way as I tried to get in the right move for a few good seconds. I really hope I don''t actually have something on me that I DIDN''T NOTICE that is causing this weird feeling or anything else today''s already strange enough! that''s just worst, no not now or today! at least, Please.


    "Well I am a bit unwell," Jason said. It is kinda true he inwardly mused plus that''ll solve any problems if I need an excuse. he smirked at his genius feeling a little bit elated but his only response was the rise of an eyebrow from Jason and Florida who for some reason were in total sync today. Seriously stop that, that''s weird.


    "Hey what wrong then," Paul asked back with obviously more interested that concern it usually wasn''t anything that got Jason down besides the occasional major disease but they always get everyone so they weren''t even considered. Still, Paul was generally concerned for him, which caught Jason''s words in his mouth before he said anything. If there was one thing Jason was weak to it was concern from others. Well, direct concern from others.


    Jason caught between a rock and hard place whether to lie or to tell the truth mulled over the prospects seriously, In any case, he did need advice on what he was this feeling and if any one of them had a clue it would be helpful plus it would be nice to talk about it for a change and get it off his chest. He couldn''t live with hiding it forever, and something was telling him he definitely wouldn''t like doing so,. So whom better to trust than his friends. So he told them everything and when I mean everything I mean just what he was feeling.


    After saying his piece, Park had a look of recognition and opened his mouth but it was Jackson who spoke instead. "Everyone has that sometimes". The first thing that came to Jason''s mind as he heard that was where the siamese twins went. Then came relief.


    "Yeah but not everyone looks like a beggar who woke up on the even worse side of the bed," Flordia retorted. So they''re doing the straight man and idiot act, I get now then. For whatever reason Jason''s mind was everywhere but where it should be right now. These guys are on point today he thought.


    "When did this happen?" she asked. Ahh, you stole Paul''s moment seeing Paul open his mouth just to close it again. how unfair for him he inwardly thought before moving on.


    I guess I have gone too far to go back now. Determination to always go forward will always lead to something he thought as he steeled himself for the upcoming ridicule.


    "I.. well .... was thinking.... about... why I was Human," he finally said after a few pauses in between speech. He couldn''t help himself, it was embarrassing after all not every day that''s what you say to close friends and co-workers after they ask some questions about you''re well-being. He also couldn''t help turning red from said embarrassment. But soon he felt worried since what he expected to come next was a long stretch of silence. Luckily or unluckily because he didn''t get enough time to get his thought in orders his worries were for not as Paul abruptly responded.


    "Oh... It''s that!" he said, he seemed to be beaming for no obvious reason and Jackson''s look also mirrored him, Florida''s own, not so much before Paul turned deadly serious.


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    Here it was, here is where it all begins. My journey of finding truths, stupid mistakes, and well bad choices. I learned a lot from this, especially how to talk to people better, concerning these topics in the future. Well on to it then, let''s get this over with.


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    Well the next moment that happened here was well pretty ballsy.


    "So it''s that, huh," Jackson asked, before turning to Florida and Paul


    "Seems like it," Paul responded


    Jackson was now staring at Florida while Paul spoke adding to the many questions Jason was asking inside his head right now with one that brought out even more questions.


    "Dude it seems you got to get yourself back your Humanity or you simply forgot to get refunded," he said matter of factly before turning to Florida too.


    Now Jason felt like he was the butt of a joke, his questions were on a carousel spinning round and round never getting anywhere.


    Jason now with ever the more questions to ask Paul now turned to Jackson who spoke next.


    "Tsked, Seems like there is someone here who doesn''t want to listen to any of this," he said obviously indicating he was talking about Florida.


    "Just leave her alone ok, she can do whatever she wants to you know," Park responded, grinning after making what Jason can only assume was a joke.


    "Nice one," Jackson said. Confirming his suspicions.


    Now if Jason wasn''t lost he sure was now he seldom missed jokes especially bad ones and this one whatever it was referencing to went completely over his head though it seemed like it could use some work.


    Florida was the obvious focus of the conversation but he just couldn''t get why. There wasn''t anything, she neither said nor did that indicated any of the vague things they mentioned. The only thing I could point to was that she was just unnaturally stiff like a statue. Jason''s focus was now on Flordia as weel trying to glean anything but he just couldn''t get anything so he opted to ask instead.


    "Guys what are you" - JESUS CHRIST WHAT HAPPEN TO HER EYES- at first it was hard to see but well now he sure as hell noticed her eyes were definitely wasn''t there. Honestly, he was now stumped, shocked, and in disbelief at the same time, he even had retreated two steps backward without even noticing. Which was embarrassing as he didn''t even feel that weird at the sight. Shock yes but he didn''t think it was weird. it was odd it probably is from the constant weird feeling.


    Then it not only dawned on him that this was something that happened to one of his close friends but that the others were acting almost completely normal to this spectacle. Jason stopped and took some much needed time to just clarify what he was seeing and if it was real.


    "You okay man what did you intend on saying a while ago before you stopped," Paul asked. Jason didn''t even pay to heed him any mind as he continued to stare. Yep still there


    Jason was done totally finished, she still had eyes but they were craved inwards? like she retracted them kinda but they still were there though like she tuned them inside out and moved them back into her head halfway he guesses. He didn''t know why he calmly assessing this logic breaker when he expected his response to usually result in screams and throwing out questions, maybe he was a scientist from birth he joked. No joking has been my way of dealing with things I don''t what to or find unpleasant this means I probably am freaking out.Ensure your favorite authors get the support they deserve. Read this novel on the original website.


    "What is happening to her eyes!" he hardly blurted out as he caught himself and asked the rest calmly, "just asking?", Safety measures, right only fools usually cross where angels dare to tread blindly and without preparation.


    "Ah, it just means she doesn''t want to hear or take part this kind of talk in any way, shape, or form," Jackson said bluntly with a look of curiosity at Jason, most people usually don''t speak about such topics freely ESPECIALLY in Public but there were always exceptions.


    Jason felt relieved after hearing what Jackson said since he shows either shock or any other bad indicator emotion to his query; Jason felt he was in the clear, a good sign.


    It''s not like I am up against something deadly right? I could''ve just woken up on the wrong side of the bed this morning and discovered new stuff. It happens all the time and there is never a time too late for that, Jason thought optimistically.


    Interrupting Jason''s thoughts Jackson said to him, "you''re quite open in that aspect."


    Huh huh? Jason thought. me? the obvious question was about what? and that was exactly he asked to which Jackson just chuckled "There are quite a lot of people who don''t want to talk about these kinds of things like" he said directing a finger at Florida "but you just came up and blurter that out though I guess it might have something to do with your condition," he said in contemplation.


    To which Park nodded, "Yep you should get that fixed by the way if don''t want to stay that way."


    To this Jackson nodded and added, "unless you''d prefer that of course". People do different things anyway so what couldn''t they enjoy or prefer.


    "Though I''ve not seen that many people who prefer going in between but mind you I don''t ask," this time Paul nodded back Sagely.


    "Do you know how many people might be as open as you say I am?" Jason inquired. This is it with this I''ll at least learn one thing about what they''re talking about and that is whether it is something known or private in other words -- the scope.


    As if answering his wishes Jackson replied "About to one to one hundred I believe, give or take though specifics of who are mostly uncounted for."


    Now that stopped him, there were at least one thousand people who knew about his topic without him knowing anything and that was in the minority! The hundred-thousand part flew over his head with him not even daring himself to think that. Quickly he found himself and asked another question to clarify just once more the information.


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    I''ll be honest I was too flustered for my own good and I should have just gone and asked about the butt of the joke instead of dancing around the issue. I was well excited, to say the least, albeit I notice this now and I probably didn''t notice this then but then again the shock didn''t have me thinking straight. But just to clarify I can''t read minds okay that''s something in the future and not applied to here at all.


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    "How many people do you think acts like Florida over there towards this," he said. By now Jason had a solid grasp on how to ask these things in a vague way utilizing their special way of saying of referencing something but nothing. At least nothing he understood.


    Jackson noticed his question and answered without skipping a beat,


    "Almost everyone dude, probably anyone you could find"


    Hear his answer Jackson''s answer to his last question. Jason stifled both a sigh and a curse under his breath. That could either mean a lot of people and that doesn''t tell him what he wants to know or everyone on the planet and that is worrying.


    Paul was nodding a little less to this Jason noticed but he didn''t delve into this. People keep secrets too he thought probably nothing still he thought but I think I am taking this whole thing too far so let''s backtrack.


    From the way they are talking about this, it is something everyone knows about or most do but doesn''t talk about freely. Which could mean it is something either discouraged or frowned upon but not so much that people are against it all together like sex or income. Greed and Lust yeah, nice examples was this the first thing on my mind. Wait cancel that thought am I really the naive princess student here.


    They mentioned preferences so it is likely SOMETHING INDIVIDUALISED and finally, the eyes of Florida w0hich show this whole thing''s .... uniqueness. This shows that there is something hidden going on that I clearly didn''t know about obviously, unless I have amnesia or woke up in an identical world that''s like mine I must''ve just been living under a rock my entire life.


    I am going to have to find this out by myself which should be simple enough since I already found out about it but I don''t know if searching this up will work or not. I''ll give it a try but I don''t even know what to properly search for and that is the problem


    He looks towards the group of three. I could just ask them and I do trust them but today was just too ..strange? no it was just different than I like. Jason thought but right afterward his head snapped up in attention.


    After finishing his thoughts Jason realized he felt much during the conversation like the sense of wrongness he felt during the day agreed with the weird conversation he had. The realization just showed how he was on to something right and that he was almost certainly way over his head and should just ask them about what was going on right now.


    The final look to the group before he ended the conversation was one of curiosity followed by a slither of a thought. Did my weird feeling cause all these perhaps? Jason thought before Paul abruptly asked after noticing the ongoing silence, "You should probably go to [REDACTED] to get that fixed if you want to and could you try to help get Florida back and tell her we''re done. I have work to do so I''ve got to go now, he said walking away.


    Author Note: What''s REDACTED you may ask well then do you think it you always get the knowledge to understand something no then try to think long and hard? alright. You won''t get it now but later you will.


    I thought this was coming sooner or later out she would have to be able to get herself out of that to do work eventually but you mean to tell me that she has to have help to do so. Couldn''t she end up staying like that all the time? Nah we probably wouldn''t really allow her to and give her less work to do while we suffer and she smarts so I think she has her own ways. So I just nodded and asked, "how do you we go about doing this". If she never plugged her ears, to begin with, in some shape or form this would have been a very inefficient way of not listening to a conversation.


    Jason didn''t have to wait long for a reply though and Jackson replied saying, "Just tell her it is time for work and that should do it, I have something to do you so I''ll be leaving it too you okay, Thanks," he said as he turned and left. Well, it was work time and they did just talk for quite some time.


    Jason nodded before he said "okay see you later" and turned to face Florida, before Jason start though, Jackson stopped briefly and said "you should have hopefully noticed it was coming that feeling but hopefully... yea... yes," he said and then continued on his stride.


    What what was that about, Jason thought. He didn''t know what was it was clearly referencing about besides the feeling he had but what did he mean by hopefully then again what did all of this mean. Moving along his thoughts he thought back to the whole conversation they just had. Breathing out a long sigh part of me wanted it to never happen but I said these things and I am now stationed at square one, Now I feel like a child in a world he doesn''t belong to and he doesn''t even know what''s going on.


    I guess you just have to go on with things as they come because right now I have to wake somebody up from a weird. What even is this state anyway? I should ask her that later ... but then again she might just turn herself back into this if I do. he thought clucking to himself, I should probably curb my curiosity.


    After staring at her still form for several seconds, Jason made up his mind that she really doesn''t seem to be undoing this anytime soon. He touched her forehead for good measure and said casually, "We''re done you can come out now" but after several seconds passed and nothing he said it again, "Hey were done with the talks so you can come out and do work", but again nothing happened for a few seconds until the room burst into a flurry of lights and no. Her eyes just retracted back outwards? yeah, outwards and she just promptly left without giving any heed of Jason''s existence no thank you or nothing. Rude, I am not asking for the world or even just something much for just a thank you, you know, he ridiculed. Sighing again he looks up and asks "this can''t be how the world is. right?


    I know the world already and I know that it isn''t beautiful but this caught my attention while unguarded. I can''t say for certain if I should delve into it too much but I know I will. I think I might be making too much of a fuss over this like a man seeing heroes for the first time.


    Still Only I leave with questions and I have no one I can turn to answer them without fear or risk or maybe that was the point, Jason thought.


    I guess I am still ignorant about everything, yeah the child analogy was pretty good. Jason thought about it said "yep I like that one;" but I still have to learn more before I enter another conversation for good measures and even if it isn''t that smart I would kinda like to savor this I guess. Too much excitement is welling up inside me and it is only growing after the sense of wrongness is now starting to fade and I feel something else for a change, now that I think about that might also be the case for the relative ease in which I came to understand and accept this all this soo quickly, Jason thought.


    This is a new sort of spectrum for me and I feel like I am walking into somewhere much bigger and farther away than I was before maybe even on a different level altogether. The scale of this was quite big and the others accepted my query within much suspicion or anything in fact so it could be something not everyone is knowledgeable about, Jason thought already making conclusions this early.


    I like the child analogy but If I had to say I really felt most like a man lost in the gods'' world right now. Jason said concluding his thoughts. He then went to go and sit down to start his work. The day continued on well afterward even normally though he certainly didn''t feel like it did.


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    It wasn''t much of a surprise now for me but it was still quite a shock at the moment. I went through that day with the grace of a rolling elephant, I got where I wanted to be but at what cost to everything around especially to my sanity. It was stupid holding expectations this early because that had all gone and blow itself up in my face and shatter at the third shock when my expectations of the truth were the highest.


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