ã€ŠOne Piece: A Pirate&#x27;s Life For Meã€‹


 Chapter 1

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    Do you remember your 21st birthday? Personally I can remember up to the point where I entered that gay bar. I was pretty hammered by that point, but let me tell you, I was popular. All the guys wanted to dance with me. Of course I was too drunk to realize that women shouldn''t look like Gimli.

    I vaguely recall leaving the bar, catcalls and whistles behind me, and needing to take a piss. So, as any responsible drunk would do, I headed down the nearest alley. Or some unfortunate person''s home. Still pretty fuzzy on that.

    The next part of my journey to take a leak is completely black. An endless void of can''t remember jack shit. But according to dependable sources, I emptied my bladder on some important guy''s statue. Considering the thing was like two stories tall and laying on its side, how was I supposed to know?

    What happened next was completely uncalled for in my opinion. This huge guy, like, bigger than The Rock huge, swings an ax at me! Who does that? It''s just a little bit of pee pee, nothing to murder a guy over. And the worst part¡­

    I pissed all over myself.

    Thankfully I managed to drunkenly stagger away from the ax-wielding maniac, but that was small comfort to a guy covered in his own shameful liquid. One of the guys with the big fucker must have whacked me good, because everything went black.

    That''s right, I got knocked the fuck out. By a goon! Not even the main boss. That''s just sad.

    So now I find myself in a cell with a killer headache and still covered in piss. I hope that doesn''t turn into some kind of running gag. Regardless, being sober sure helps recognize shapes and colors. For instance, this cell I''m in looks like it came straight out of the 1800''s.

    This would be way cooler if I was part of a tour group, but I''m pretty sure that''s not the case. Though I was pretty hammered last night¡­ Either way the next logical thing to do was¡­

    "Let me outta here goddamnit!"

    If you guessed screaming uselessly at people who weren''t there, then congratulations, you guessed correctly. You get a cookie.

    As for me, after about ten minutes of making an ass out of myself, I took a break. Who knew you could get so breathless from just yelling? It''s not like I''m in bad shape or anything, it''s just that yelling at a wall is exhausting.

    Looking around my dark, dingy, moldy cell I couldn''t spot anything that would help me escape. There was nothing that provided leverage so I could Pirates of the Caribbean out of here. I could do nothing but wait.

    And wait I did. For three days. Three fucking days. Stuck in a small 8x8 cell for three days with nothing to do was maddening. I tried to do the Iroh workout, but lost interest on day two. That being said, I did get to meet my captors. Apparently I pissed off the marines.

    Speaking of piss, I''m still covered in it. At least it was dry now.

    I asked the so-called marines how long they planned to keep me here, but all they would say is, "Until the Captain decides your punishment."

    That doesn''t sound foreboding at all. And I let them know that. By cursing at them until they left me to my ever decreasing sanity. But on day four, everything changed. That was the day I met a cat burglar.

    It started like any other day, push-ups, sit-ups and a jaunty circus jingle. It didn''t have any words, and only added to my slowly creeping madness, but if I went mad I was taking them with me! If only they were around to dive off the deep end with me. But I''m still alone and covered in¡­ well you know what.

    The sound of something large crashing was new though. Everything around me shook, and loose dirt came tumbling down on me. Was pee not enough? Was I being punished for something? I was a good person¡­ usually¡­ sometimes. I mean I donated to charity that one time.

    Okay can''t rule out divine punishment, that is definitely a possibility. Especially after what I did to that one statue of Mary. But that doesn''t explain the rumbling I heard or the screams that followed. Come to think of it, that sounded an awful lot like that one guy. Helmeppy? Heldodo? Helfrodo?

    Aw who cares, names are stupid. But something was up, my super secret Batman senses were tingling. At least that''s what I''m telling myself anyway. This could be my big chance at freedom, so I had to use all of my cunning, all of my intelligence to find a way out of here.

    "Let me out of here you butt sniffing assholes!"

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    Nami growled in frustration as she stormed down the halls of the Marine base. Not only was the whole trip a complete bust, the map she was looking to steal had been pilfered by Buggy of all people, but some idiot was causing a ruckus, making the whole base go on high alert. Honestly, she didn''t like kicking guys in the balls, but what choice did she have? She couldn''t take them down fairly after all.

    Well at least with them all distracted by whatever it was, the secret passage beneath the cells should be empty. That little nugget was the only good thing she found in the captain''s office. Apparently he used it to smuggle goods he didn''t want any do-gooders learning about. And they call her a crook.

    She slowly made her way through the base, before coming to a large, metal door. A large, metal, unlocked door. Well that made things easy.

    The door opened with a ragged squeak, like an angry roided out mouse. She flinched at the loud sound. Why did everything sound so much louder when you were trying to be sneaky?

    Making her way through the dungeon she stopped cold as a sound reached her ears. It was part up-beat, part horrifying, and part¡­ something. She wasn''t sure what it was but she knew she didn''t like it. Unfortunately the music, if it could even be called that, was coming from the direction she needed to go. She steeled herself and made her way further in.

    Immediate regret. Not only did the sound get louder and more obnoxious, it was so horribly off key that it was nearly nauseating. No wonder there were no Marines here. Even without whatever was going on, she doubted she would have found anyone in this hell hole.

    Just what kind of prisoner are they keeping down here? Shaking her head at those thoughts, as they would do her no good, she steeled her resolve once more and continued onward, to whatever horror awaited her.

    As she crept ever closer to Satan''s favorite musical, not only were her ears bleeding, but the smell. Oh god, the smell. It was like every marine used this place as a latrine and nobody believed in sanitation. Fucks were just not given.

    It was close, she could feel it. The hairs on the back of her neck stood at attention. Almost like she was being watched. She shuddered and shook those thoughts from her head. No need to freak herself out. That horrible music and stench was most likely nothing.

    "-Afro circus, afro circus, poki-dot, poki-dot, poki-dot, afro!"

    Nami shuddered again. Dear god it started singing. The "duh duh duh-duh-duh-duh duh duh duh-duh" was bad enough, but somehow, it learned english. And why poki-dots? Why afros!? No, no it doesn''t matter, just ignore it. It will go away if you ignore it.

    She was wrong. She was oh so very wrong. It just kept going. On and on and on it went. She tried to pass by the cell it was coming from. She had absolutely no desire to speak with whatever eldritch abomination could produce sounds like that, no matter how vaguely human they sounded. But it noticed her.

    "Hey you!" it shouted at her. Nami wasn''t too proud to admit she froze in her tracks, fear gripping her like a vice. She slowly turned her head to see what cruel fate had in store for her. But to her surprise, it was only some hobo.

    Within the cell stood a fairly tall man with short brown hair, sapphire colored eyes and five o''clock shadow from five days ago. His clothes were disheveled and smudged with who knows what. At least she found the stench, and the singing stopped, so at least she was up by one.

    The man in the cage, meanwhile, couldn''t help but to stare at the beautiful ginger in front of him. Slim waist, wide hips, and breasts that looked ready to pop out and sing show tunes.

    Thank you Santa.

    He had no idea how long they just stared at each other, not knowing what to say, but the awkward silence stretched on for an eternity. Maybe he could have chosen his first words to her a little more carefully and not screamed at her like a demonic clown, but in his defense, her sudden appearance shocked him. Now all he had to do was convince this beautiful girl to help him out. Easy, right?

    "So, you come here often?"

    "Shit, shit, shit, what kind of dumbass line was that? She looks just as surprised as me that someone who could master the complicated art of speaking, would use it in such a way that belied a simple understanding of english. In other words, she most likely thinks I''m a moron."

    These, and other self deprecated thoughts ran rampant through his head as Nami just stared at him like he was a moron. "Are you a moron?" she questioned, all previous fear forgotten.

    "Well, that confirms that,"he thought. He cleared his throat before responding. "Sorry about that, it''s just been awhile since I''ve seen someone. Pretty sure they forgot about me. Names Nicholas, but you can call me Nick," he held out his hand through the bars for her to shake.

    She only raised an eyebrow in response, "Uh huh." Did he really think she would touch that filthy hand? That she couldn''t smell that eye watering smell? No way in hell was she touching him willingly.

    He seemed to realize that and retracted his hand awkwardly. "So, um, I don''t suppose you could let me out of here could you?" he asked. This was the chance he''d been waiting for, being rescued by a beautiful woman almost made the whole ordeal worth it.

    "And why would I do that?" she questioned back. Her arms crossed over her ample chest, creating a tantalizing visage."No, bad Nick, bad. Stop staring at those mountainous peaks and convince those boobs to free you! This is your only chance."The one track mind is strong with this one.

    "Out of the goodness of your heart?" The look on her face did not fill him with hope. It was blank, devoid of all life. Come to think of it, his ex had the same look on her face when she dumped him. Weird.

    "I don''t think so," she responded. Okay, plan A, out the window. Time to open the door for plan B.

    "Ok look, there''s clearly something going on outside right?" he asked, to which she nodded in confirmation. "So that means those Marine guys are running around hopped up on pissy juice. What if they find you? Can you really take them all on yourself?" She actually looked slightly contemplative, but only slightly.

    "And I''m supposed to trust you? For all I know, you''re a pirate and deserve whatever you get," she responded hotly. Huh, she looked cute when she was angry. No wait, focus. She thinks I''m a pirate? Seriously? Do I look like Johnny Depp?

    "I''m not a pirate. Look, if you''re worried about why I''m in here, it was a simple misunderstanding," he tried. Her cute, angry look didn''t change, so he doubted she was convinced.

    "A misunderstanding huh? You really expect me to believe that? I heard they''re planning your execution after that guy in the courtyard. Mind explaining that, or is that a misunderstanding too?" she shot back. Did this smelly guy think she was born yesterday? You have to get up pretty early to get one over on Nami.

    He looked absolutely miserable at her question. He was really hoping to avoid this topic, but oh well. In for a penny. "Yes, yes it is. It was a simple matter of¡­ alcohol induced public urination in an undesignated area."

    "What?" she asked bewildered.

    "I got drunk and pissed on a statue, okay! Apparently they take great offense to that here. It wasn''t even a religious one this time," he mumbled that last part. At least he didn''t think it was.

    Nami could only stare in bewilderment. This wasn''t a situation she was prepared for. How does one prepare for it? She closed her eyes and rubbed her head in irritation. Honestly, she met the weirdest people sometimes.

    "So, will you help me out?" he asked again. Nami opened her eyes and stared at him for a moment. Maybe he could be useful. It was true the whole base was freaking out, and the noise above hadn''t gotten any quieter. They would come down here sooner or later and as stupid and pathetic as the guy in front of her was, he didn''t deserve to die for it.

    Probably¡­

    "Alright fine," she sighed, exasperated. He let out a little cheer in excitement. "But before that, I think we should discuss monetary compensation for services rendered."

    He stopped his cheer at her voice. Money? He had to trade his life for money? Well it was better than dying. But before he could voice his opinion on the matter she spoke again.

    "A million Beris ought to do it."

    He nearly choked on his own spit. A million what? Nick had no idea what the hell berries had to do with anything, but apparently she wanted a million of them. Shit, he had no idea what to do. Even if he still had his wallet he only had about $50 in it. Not nearly enough to buy a million berries.

    He panicked for a moment, but forced himself to calm down. Maybe he could convince her of an I.O.U of some kind. He convinced her to let him out, even though she was going to bleed him dry for it, so maybe he could convince her of this.

    "I er, I don''t exactly have enough for that," he told her tentatively. "Maybe we can work out a deal?" He wasn''t sure how she would respond. Would she leave him here to rot?

    "Hmm I suppose. You''ll just have to work it off then. I''ve been looking for a paw- I mean a partner. Don''t let me down now,'' she grinned at him.

    This story is posted elsewhere by the author. Help them out by reading the authentic version.

    "Hey wait, did she just call me a pawn. Bitch. Well at least I can get out of here now, can''t complain too much."

    "Oh, and you need a shower, like, pronto."

    "Double bitch."

    Nami made quick work of the jail cell, showing burglar skills dwarves would pay a mountain of gold for. Soon enough, Nick could taste the sweet air of freedom. It tasted like he smelled. Mostly because he was basically an indentured servant.

    Nami looked at the man up and down again. Besides the smell, which could be taken care of, he wasn''t so bad. Athletic, fairly good looking, overall not bad. But now wasn''t the time. They had to make their escape.

    "Alright follow me, the exit''s that way," she said, moving toward the opposite way she came in. That worked for him. He quickly fell into step behind her, eager to rid himself of this place, only to come up short as she came to a sudden stop.

    "I''m gonna need you to take a few steps back," she stated, turning to look at him while plugging her nose. Good God, how could anything smell so bad? Like a rotten egg baking on a pile of garbage. Nami really hoped he would be able to wash it off, otherwise it would be a short partnership.

    "I get it, I smell!" he yelled back. He knew he was stanky, she didn''t need to remind him of that fact. A good scrub down and he would smell like a bed of roses. Maybe¡­ It did kind of cling to you.

    "Keep your voice down idiot. Or do you want to go back to your cage?" she hissed at him. Honestly it might not even matter. His stench could be smelt for miles, so they could probably track them. They wouldn''t be able to use dogs though, they might die.

    Nicholas grumbled to himself but refrained from speaking. No need to bite the hand that feeds you after all. Or freed in this also gave her some distance, as to not offend her by way of odor.

    They steadily made their way through the dingy, cavernous halls. Thankfully with the ongoing ruckus outside there weren''t any patrols they had to worry about. The only real problem was finding the entrance to the secret passage.

    Thankfully, Nami had that map. "It should be pretty close. Hmm, nope, not there, not there either¡­ Ah-hah found it!" she exclaimed joyfully. She pressed down on something Nicholas couldn''t see, and a tunnel opened up in front of them, the wall sliding back and to the side.

    Nicholas would have helped her search but there were a couple problems. One, she wouldn''t let him get within five feet of her, due to obvious reasons. And two¡­

    She had to bend over to hit the button and that was just plain distracting. That skirt she was wearing could barely contain the firm bubble that was her ass.

    "How is it possible to have an ass that perfect? Did she have work done? And we can''t forget about her boobs. It might be hard to see down here in this hell hole, but even a blind man could see those things."

    Thankfully Nami couldn''t hear his thoughts, and they continued without incident. The real problem reared its ugly head when they neared the actual exit. Not only were there marines stationed there, but they were also blocking the door leading to salvation and bathtubs.

    Which at this point were pretty much the same thing.

    All three of them sat around a plain, wooden table nestled in an alcove only feet from the door. There was no way either of them could sneak past them.

    "So what do we do now?" Nicholas whispered to his lovely companion. Sure he could probably take them out, having trained as a boxer for over a decade, not to mention all the scrapes he got into over the years, but he wasn''t sure he could do it quietly.

    Fighting was like sex after all, if somebody isn''t screaming, you''re doing it wrong.

    "I thought you could handle it tough guy. Or was all your talk earlier just hot air?" she replied. Nami raised an eyebrow at him, giving him an unimpressed stare. What did she let him out for if not for this exact reason? Well, besides being a meat shield that is.

    "Oh it''s on now bitch. Question my pride as a man? My very manhood itself? I''ll show you."

    "Fine, just stay here and watch. They won''t know what hit ''em."

    Boy, his manhood sure got him into a lot of problems.

    "Ugh, that smell is getting worse. I can''t wait for the captain to kill that guy so we can air this place out," said goon #1. Okay, that guy gets his ass kicked first. Don''t these people know he doesn''t want to smell like this? It wasn''t a choice he made damn it!

    "I know right. A rotting corpse smells better than this guy. I just can''t believe it reaches all the way down here," goon #2 says. Or maybe it was #3. Who knows, all goons look alike.

    Either way, these bastards were going to pay, and they just gave him an idea. With an evil grin, he slowly and quietly approached the unaware Marines. Thankfully, goon #1 and #2 were right next to each other, meaning he could take them both out at once. Now he just needs a catchphrase to yell while doing it.

    "Surprise bitch!" Glorious.

    Nami didn''t seem impressed by it, but who cares. The look on their faces was priceless. Taking them all by surprise he grabbed the two nearest marines and¡­

    Shoved them headfirst into his armpits.

    Nami stared at the struggling Marines in horror. The stench was bad enough at a distance, she couldn''t imagine what it must be like at ground zero. She put her hand to her mouth to hold in the vomit, just thinking about it was making her sick.

    But her discomfort was nothing compared to the trauma being experienced by them. They flailed wildly, desperately trying to escape, but it was all for naught. Nicholas held them firm, laughing maniacally, "Payback you mother fuckers!"

    The last Marine could only stand and watch, unable to bring himself to help his comrades. Already his eyes were starting to water. He couldn''t bring himself to get any closer. He just couldn''t! They would understand, they had to!

    Within a few moments it was over. The two Marines lay slumped on the ground, out cold and foaming at the mouth, Nicholas standing over them triumphantly. With a satisfied smile, he slowly turned to face the remaining Marine, who was shaking nervously.

    "D-Don''t you come any closer. I''m warning you!" he screamed, voice cracking. He didn''t want to befall the same fate as his friends. He drew his saber and held it in front of him defiantly.

    Nicholas wasn''t new to fighting against bladed weapons, knives were pretty common in a street fight after all, so he had some experience with it, and what was a sword besides a bigger knife?

    "Man, where the hell am I? These guys don''t look like any Marines I''ve ever seen, and those jail cells look like they belong in some kind of movie. Oh well, no use over thinking it. My first priority is to get the hell out of here, finding out where I am comes next."

    With those thoughts he started toward his opponent with a relaxed gait. Marine goon #3 backed away nervously, until his back hit a wall. He looked back at it briefly before turning to the man approaching him. If he didn''t stop him from escaping, Captain Morgan would have his head.

    Gathering up his courage, and holding his breath, he charged at Nicholas. He swung down only to hit air. "Too slow," said Nicholas from beside him. Before the Marine could lift his weapon, a fist was lodged in his face. Teeth, blood and spit left his mouth as he flew backward.

    Nicholas stared at his hand in astonishment,"I know I hit hard, but not that hard. What the hell?"Punching people was nothing new to him. Hell, knocking people out with one punch was nothing new to him. But actually sending someone flying with a punch, now that was new.

    "Just what in the actual fuck is going on? First I end in jail for public urination. Nothing new there, but since when do the Marines have the authority to arrest a US citizen? Let alone execute them? Something is definitely wrong here."

    "Second, since when have I been this strong? Dad was a heavyweight champion and taught me everything I know, but even he''s never sent someone flying back 10 feet with a punch. I mean, he sent that hobo flying pretty far, but that was with a car. I''ve never been able to beat him, not once, so how can I suddenly be stronger than him?"

    Unknowing of Nicholas''s inner turmoil, Nami approached him, with reluctance of course. He still needed a bath after all.

    "Hey, not bad. Guess you weren''t all talk after all. Maybe it wasn''t such a bad idea to let you out," she grinned. This was actually turning out to be a pretty useful trip. She may not have got the map she wanted, but she did get a capable lackey. Guess everything did have a silver lining.

    Nicholas puffed out his chest, previous thoughts forgotten and manhood restored. "Of course, what did you expect?"

    "I was pretty sure you were going to die," she responded blandly.

    Wait, what? "Than what was your plan? Just let them kill me?" he asked in confusion. Surely she didn''t mean to sacrifice him, right? What kind of person would do that?

    "Of course not. While you had them distracted, I was going to sneak up on them and give them a good whack on the head," she explained. Though if he had died it wouldn''t have changed the plan all that much. They still would have been distracted, and she still would have whacked them. She would have just felt a little guilty about it is all.

    "But you took them out all by yourself. Good boy."

    Did she think he was a dog? Well whatever, at least they could get out now. "So what next, oh brilliant one? Can you pick the lock, cause I don''t see a key."

    "Just who do you think I am? There isn''t a lock I can''t open, I just need a minute," she stated confidently puffing out her chest. Which was just plain distracting. I mean, they bounced and jiggled for nearly five seconds. Was she doing it on purpose? Was it magic? Witchcraft? How damn it!?

    She turned away and made for the door, snapping him out of his thoughts about her boobs."Damn those things are dangerous. I need to be careful, lest I fall for their hypnotic spell."Turning toward the fallen Marines, he had an idea. Nami should appreciate it as well.

    Speaking of said cat burglar, she was carefully picking the lock. It was more complicated than it looked at first, and she only had one pair of lock picks on her. She didn''t want to break them, so she was being very methodical about it.

    Even so, it didn''t take long to hear that telltale sign she loved to hear of a lock being opened. With a haughty smirk she turned around, "See I told you I could-WHY ARE YOU NAKED!?"

    Nami''s face turned bright red, whether from anger or embarrassment was anyone''s guess. She couldn''t fathom what was wrong with this guy. First the singing and now he''s a nudist.

    "Hmm, you say something?" he questioned, channeling his inner Kakashi. Turning to face her, Nami was treated to quite the view. A view she never asked for but a view none-the-less.

    "You damn well heard me, and turn back around! I don''t want to see that!" she yelled. Nami figured he was pretty muscular under all that baggy clothing, and wasn''t opposed to a little bit of eye candy, but what she got was a whole lot more.

    "Couldn''t you just face the other way? Or are you enjoying the show?" he asked with a smirk, noting that she in fact, did not turn away. He also shook his hips, making Little Nicky rock back and forth.

    She promptly turned around, face redder than before, "Don''t try and change the subject. Why did you take your clothes off, huh? If you think I''m that kind of girl you''re dead wrong," she practically growled out embarrassed. If he so much as put one move her he would join the Marines on the floor.

    "Calm down would you? I just thought it would be a good idea to change clothes. Might help with the smell," he answered, putting on the marine''s pants. Thankfully, goon #2 was about his size.

    "Oh, that''s actually not a bad idea. I''m surprised you thought of it," she snarked, calming down. It wouldn''t get rid of the smell completely, but it couldn''t hurt.

    "Yeah, yeah. Anyway, you get that door open?" he asked, putting the Marine''s sleeveless shirt over his head. He would have preferred to shower before putting on clean clothes, but beggars can''t be choosers. Having shoes was also a blessing. They were a little small, but better than nothing. "Oh, and you can turn back around now."

    Nami did so, with a bit of reluctance, not fully trusting that he was properly clothed. Thankfully he was, so now she could stop thinking about how IT looked like the muscular tail of a jaguar, lazily swaying back and forth.

    "Of course I did. My skills as a thief are first rate you know," she stated proudly. After eight years of constantly robbing pirates, she has gotten pretty good at it. You should always take pride in your work, and Nami was a very proud woman.

    "So you''re a thief huh? That explains a lot," Nicholas muttered. Not only did it explain her greed, and the subsequent bartering for his life, but it also explained why she was so good at picking locks. Good thing he didn''t have anything worth stealing.

    Cause the Marines already stole it.

    "And what''s that supposed to mean?" Nami questioned. She didn''t need this guy judging her for her choices. Besides, she only stole from pirates and criminals.

    And the Marines.

    And stupid people in general.

    Okay so maybe she wasn''t the honorable thief she portrays herself to be, but in her defense, the Marines are corrupt as a general rule, and stupid people deserve it. So there.

    "Nothing, just explains your skill set is all. Not like I have room to judge," Nicholas casually responded. Nami didn''t really seem like a bad person, per say, and he had no idea of her backstory or what led her to become a thief in the first place.

    "Oh really? So what kind a person am I traveling with," she asked with a coy smile. It was the type of smile that poets would write about and artists would drive themselves mad trying to recreate.

    In her humble opinion anyway.

    Nicholas let out a bark of laughter, "You really want to hear my sordid past now? I''d be happy to tell you some stories, I have a particularly good one about a goat named Charlie, but why don''t we save the small talk for later and get out of here?"

    "You have a point," she said. Nami did find herself a bit curious about the man she was traveling with, but not enough to stay in this place. She walked toward the now unlocked door and swung it wide open, "Come on, hurry up. And grab that torch."

    Nicholas chuckled slightly at the haughty woman. But before he left, he grabbed a few of the firearms the Marines had on them. A pistol and a rifle. They weren''t anything fancy and woefully outdated, but they could come in handy. He also made sure to snatch a sword. He had no idea how to use it, but if sources were to be believed, you just had to stick ''em with the pointy end. Even he could do that.

    But that wasn''t all. Hanging on a hook was a Marine coat. He couldn''t see it from the angle he was at before, and now that he could, it would be commandeered as restitution for his unlawful imprisonment.

    Putting it on, it reached down to his ankles, a near perfect fit. It was surprisingly comfortable as well, being made from finer materials than his other pilfered clothing. At least he assumed so. Nicholas just wished he had a mirror, wanting to see how awesome he looked. Say what you want about the Marines, they at least had style.

    "What are you doing? I thought you wanted to get out of here," said Nami. After realizing she wasn''t being followed, she turned back around in an angry huff. If he thought he could ditch her and get out of paying her back, he had another thing coming.

    She wasn''t expecting him to be wearing a Marine officer''s coat, twisting and turning to try and get a good look at himself.

    "Nami, look what I found, cool huh?" he said with boyish excitement. Nami would never admit it out loud, but he looked kind of cute like that. Instead, she forced a look of irritation on her face and scolded him.

    "Fantastic, you look like a real Marine. Can we just get out of here already?"

    He pouted at her response. Girls just didn''t get it. Oh well. He knew he looked awesome, and that was all that mattered.

    And with that, the trek to freedom began anew. The path they were on sloped downward at a constant angle, and seemed to curve to the right slightly. According to Nami, it should open up at sea level. Apparently this Captain Morgan fellow used it for smuggling illegal goods, and the Marines from before must have been in on it, like a bunch of crooked New York cops.

    "So how do you know all this anyway?" he questioned. He very much doubted this was common intel, so she had to have learned it from somewhere.

    "From Captain Morgan himself. While I was in his office, I just so happened to find it in his desk," she stated.

    "Wait, he just left incriminating evidence lying around?" he asked. How could anyone be that stupid? It was on the level of a redneck incest baby. Now he feels even worse at being incarcerated by them.

    "Yup. The Marines aren''t filled with the brightest of individuals."

    "That seems to be putting it mildly,"he thought. Well it works out for them. If Morgan wasn''t so stupid, they might have had a problem escaping. The commotion from earlier probably helped too.

    "So what were you looking for in his office?" he questioned. The path they were on finally flattened out, and the torch he was carrying flickered slightly from a slight breeze. They must be near the exit.

    "What makes you think I was looking for something?" she asked back. She could see a light ahead, and it wasn''t the flickering of torchlight. It was the sweet glimmer of sunlight. It was about damn time too, she was sick of this place an hour ago.

    "You said it yourself, you''re a thief. I highly doubt you snuck in here for no reason." Well, she could have, but that would be stupid, and for all her attitude, he didn''t think she was stupid. Sexy and a bit snobby, yes, but not stupid.

    "Alright if you must know, I was looking for a map," she responded. They had made it to the exit. Nami placed her hand in front of her face to block the sunlight from her eyes, and enjoyed the warmth it brought. She didn''t realize how cold she was until now, and was even more grateful to be out of that place.

    "A map?" he asked, standing beside her. With his fancy new getup she could tolerate the smell that lingered, but he would still need a bath. Much like his companion, he was enjoying the warmth of the sun, letting out a sound of content. People were not meant to live underground.

    "Mhm, a map to the Grand Line. With that, I could earn 100,000,000 Beris in no time," she told him. Taking a look at her, she seemed to be in a far away place. Her eyes were glossy and unfocused, deep in thought.

    So that''s why she seemed like Mr. Krabs. He didn''t know the reason, and felt like it wasn''t his place to ask. At least, not yet. But she needed the money for something, and Nicholas didn''t think it was for something selfish. But thinking about it for a second¡­

    Her story sure sounded familiar. And getting a better look at her in the sunlight, she looked awfully familiar, and even more beautiful than down in the dungeons. And the darkness was doing nothing for her figure, causegoddamnshe was fine.

    Wait a moment¡­ Nami¡­ 100,000,000 Berries¡­ Boobs¡­

    "Holy shit you''re Nami."

    That seemed to snap her out of her revere, as she turned to look at her now slack jawed companion in confusion. "Uh, yeah, I already told you that. Don''t tell me the sun fried your brains?"

    But he could only stare at her in wonder. She was Nami. Nami for God''s sake! The wet dream of fanboys everywhere. But, but how? This shouldn''t be possible. Isekai bullshit wasn''t real.

    Or was it? Was he dreaming? Dead? Drunk? Drunk-dead? Wait, was that even a thing? Ah, who cares. The important thing was¡­

    He was in One Piece.

 Chapter 2

    It''s been nearly a day since Nami and Nick escaped the Marines in Shells Town, and he remembers it like it was yesterday. After leaving the tunnels, they hijacked their dinghy, and Nick was made to row them around the island. If it wasn''t what amounted to slave labor, it could have been romantic.

    But it wasn''t, and it didn''t lessen his debt one itty bitty iota. Oh well, at least he wasn''t trapped in a cell with an imaginary friend named Carl. Left that asshole where he found him. In a cell.

    More importantly, they made it to where her slightly larger dinghy was moored and said their final goodbyes to this good for nothing town. Nami made him take a bath first though. No bathtubs, just a big ass ocean and a bar of soap. Where she got the soap from he doesn''t know, but he now smelled like lavender so he didn''t really care.

    Nick did kinda want to see Luffy and Zoro, but oh well. He''ll run into them in the next arc. It felt weird saying that, like fourth wall breaking weird, but it was the truth, and he once cosplayed as Deadpool so it should be fine.

    So they set sail into the great unknown. Nami, a beautiful navigator with slightly klepto tendencies, and Nick, a dude cast off into another world and shamed beyond his greatest imagining. The story may have had a strange and slightly sad beginning, but their legend would shake the world from its very foundations.

    If only it wasn''t so damn awkward. They''ve been sailing for a while now, which was good as it kept him from the panic attack that was sure to spring up the moment his hands weren''t idle, but the two of them were practically strangers. The silence was getting louder and louder, and no matter how awkward things were right now, they would be ten times worse if he put his foot in his mouth.

    Which was seemingly more and more likely. Nami didn''t need his help to sail the small boat they were on, so Nick didn''t have much to do. She did bark some orders from time to time, but other than that, nothing. Maybe he should start up a conversation? Get the ball rolling as it were.

    Foot, prepare to meet mouth.

    "So, uh, where are we going exactly? You never did tell me," he questioned. So far so good. A normal question given in the normal decibel range. Brain don''t fail me now!

    Nami turned from whatever she was doing to properly get them through the ocean, "I guess I should tell you. We''re going to Orange Town. I heard that''s where the Buggy Pirates are. It was just a rumor, but that''s all I got right now."

    Nick nodded, "Sure, sure, makes sense. But uh, why are we looking for pirates exactly? He owe you money or something?" Of course he knew why they were looking for Buggy, but Nami didn''t know that he knew that, so he had to ask so he would have a reason to know what he knew.

    Make sense?

    "He owes me a map. That stupid clown got to it before I did, but I''ll have the last laugh. Nobody steals from Nami."

    Nick wasn''t sure that was how that worked but he sure as hell wasn''t going to tell her that. He remembered how violent she could get from the show, and how beat the shit Luffy would get after incurring her wrath. The dude made of rubber, beaten bloody. No thank you.

    "I see."

    With that she continued to watch our course, and Nick continued to watch her in a totally normal, non-creepy way. Alright so it was a little creepy, but come on! If you saw Nami in all her glorious flesh, you would stare too.

    Picture it now, Nami standing on a slightly swaying ship, her hair gently blowing in the breeze, and her breasts mimicking the motions of the ship. Swaying this way and that way, jiggling in a never-ending cascade of motion. You would stare too, don''t even try to deny it.

    But all good things must come to an end. In this case, Nami decided to take a nap. Why she thought trusting Nick with their lives was anyone''s guess. The lack of sleep must have robbed her of good judgment.

    After confirming that he could, in fact, read a compass, she laid her fine ass down and closed her eyes. Northwest, that was their direction. All he had to do was follow basic directions and they would be fine.

    Fifty-fifty percent chance then.

    Could be worse he supposed. Now he just needed to not fuck up and he would earn sweet, sweet brownie points with the big tittied goddess. It was all coming together.

    Unfortunately, he was now free and clear to have his existential crisis. There were no more boobalahs to keep him distracted/entertained. Actually, that wasn''t entirely true, as they did seem to rise and fall hypnotically with her every breath. Seriously, the jiggle physics of this world were top notch.

    10/10 would recommend.

    So he was in One Piece, isekai''d in a drunken stupor with nary a truck-kun to be found. No gamer powers that he could tell, and you can be assured he tried. Made him look constipated.

    But it could be worse, there were plenty of brutal worlds he could have been sent to where the chance of survival was best friends with the number zero. The problem wasn''t the world per se. The problem was that he didn''t remember enough about it.

    Nick was the kind of guy who preferred watching Dub whenever he could. He didn''t want to read and watch at the same time. The last time he watched One Piece, it ended after Luffy beat up some god.

    He had seen some clips from later in the anime, so he had an idea of some of the events, but the picture wasn''t clear. He knew what the puzzle was, he just couldn''t put it together. That was his biggest source of stress right now. If he knew what was going to happen, he could plan. But since he didn''t, he couldn''t.

    Oh well, nothing to do but grit his teeth and soldier on. Orange Town and Buggy the Bitch Clown was next, he remembered that much. That''s where they would meet Luffy and Zoro for the first time.

    Probably. Who knew what kind of fuckery his inclusion did to the story.

    Buggy only had two members worth a damn in his crew, the acrobat and the furry. Personally, Nick didn''t want to fight either of them, especially the furry. Gods be willing this wasn''t some kind of au. His knowledge was spotty at best, no need to poke more holes in it.

    Hang on, didn''t his presence alone make it into some kind of au. Sure it might not effect anything yet, but the more he was involved with events the more derailed the story would become.

    Did he just trigger a red flag? It felt like he just triggered a red flag. Oh well, that''s just a bridge he''ll have to cross when he gets to it. Or burn it down, he was fine either way.

    For now he would concentrate on the present. He was about to have a rendezvous at the circus after all, it would behoove him to be prepared. Wouldn''t want Nami to think him a lousy date after all.

    The question is, would he be strong enough? Back at Shells Town when he fought those grunts in the prison, he sent one flying. Literally. Something that wouldn''t be possible in his old world. Is this one making him stronger? Making his power equivalent to what it would be if he were a native?

    No real way to find out. Speculation wouldn''t do him much good besides increasing his anxiety. Best to just punch things and hope for the best.

    What about Devil Fruits? Would he be able to eat one and not explode? Because he really didn''t want to explode unless it was inside Nami. Or all over her. Damnit, now he was worried and horny. Well, if he gets the chance to, he''ll do all of the above. Safety in numbers after all.

    Wasn''t there some other kind of power as well? He vaguely recalled some clips of the later anime where Luffy turned his arms black and smacked a bitch. Fuck, what was it called? Hamu? Hame? Hatchi? Haki! That''s it, it was called Haki.

    Some kind of magic power that fucked Devil Fruit users. It was based on willpower or something, Nick couldn''t remember, he just knew he would need it. Fights in anime only ever escalate in power creep, and One Piece was no different, now he just needed to figure out how to use it.

    Learning that power might be more beneficial in the long run than eating a Devil Fruit anyway. In a world that was 90% water, in a show that was all about sailing all over that world, not being able to swim seems like a death sentence.

    Maybe he just needed to meditate, but he doubted his spoiled, attention deficient brain could handle it. Not any time soon anyway. He was too used to the instant gratification of a modern society. Patience was not a virtue he could claim.

    But without t.v, the internet, or video games, he didn''t have much else to do. Staring at Nami''s breasticles may have been a good way to pass the time, but it wouldn''t keep him alive in the long run. And One Piece was a marathon.

    Though, it may actually be a good way to meditate. Pretty sure he lost a good thirty minutes earlier from his "not at all creepy" staring. He was focused on nothing else but boobs. All other thoughts fled from his mind. That sure sounded like meditation to him. Just as long as Nami never found out.

    And speaking of Nami, Nick turned to the peacefully sleeping she-demon. She looked content. How she could sleep so soundly next to a person she barely knew was a mystery. Not that Nick would ever do anything. He was a creep, not a predator.

    Speaking of being a creep, Nick became distracted by the movement of her chest. Up jiggle, down jiggle, up jiggle, down jiggle. He became more and more entranced with every breath she took. And so his thoughts drifted off into space, becoming nothing more than ether.

    <hr noshade="noshade" size="1">

    "How did you take us so far off course!?" Nami yelled. She had just awoken from a fairly good nap, it was hard to get quality beauty sleep on a tiny boat after all, only to find her companion looking at the compass she gave him in confusion and horror.

    They had drifted too far to the west and would need to course correct. It wasn''t a massive problem, but it would add more than a few hours to their travel time. Nami didn''t want to be stuck on this cramped vessel any longer than she needed to be. That''s what she gets for trusting someone.

    Stolen from its rightful author, this tale is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

    "One direction, you had to go in one direction. So how!?" she continued to berate. Nick mumbled something under his breath that Nami didn''t quite catch.

    "What was that? Speak up!"

    Nick sighed. God she had a pair of lungs on her. Great for in the bedroom, but terrible when he screwed up. And screw up he did. So distracted by her heavenly tatas he allowed them to drift off course. Nothing that a few hours wouldn''t fix, but still.

    "I got distracted. I offer my sincere apologies and beg for your forgiveness," he apologized. When a man makes a mistake he must own up to it. That was what his father taught him.

    Nami sighed, hand rubbing her temple in frustration, "Whatever, it''s fine. A few more hours won''t kill me. But I''m increasing your debt by another 10,000 for the extra work you''re making me do. You''re supposed to make my life easier, not harder."

    Nick''s eye twitched but he remained silent. She was mad enough and it was his fault. No choice but to suck it up and pay the piper. Literally in this case.

    Nami quickly went to work getting them back on course. Putting her body aside, watching her work was something. She clearly knew what she was doing. There wasn''t even a smidgen of hesitation as she got them going in the right direction.

    With nothing to do, Nick laid back, stretching. Now that Nami was wide eyed and bushy tailed, it was time to relax.

    Or maybe not.

    Gazing out into the endless blue, Nick noticed a dark speck that clearly didn''t belong. Groaning, he reached over and grabbed Nami''s telescope to get a better look. And wouldn''t you know it, they had company.

    "Hey Nami, you might wanna take a look at this," he said, holding out the spyglass. Eyebrow raised, she did as he asked, as he pointed out where to look, "Right over there."

    Through the telescope she could clearly see another boat heading in their direction. It was a bit bigger than theirs, with an actual cabin. She could see three dirty looking people milling about. What was most concerning was the flag they were flying, a grinning skull with a big red nose.

    They were members of the Buggy Pirates.

    "What are they doing out here? They''re supposed to be in Orange Town," she panicked. She turned to her completely calm companion, "This is all your fault!"

    Nick appeared confused, pointing to himself in disbelief, "Who me?"

    "Yes you. If you hadn''t gotten us off course we wouldn''t be in this mess," she growled. While a fair point, it really didn''t seem like a big deal. There were only 3 of them after all, so it shouldn''t be too much of a problem to take them out if they get problematic.

    "Ok, well, you may have a point there, but I like to see this as an opportunity," Nick said with a smile.

    "Opportunity?" Nami asked with suspicion. "What kind of opportunity?"

    "Let''s call it an upgrade. After all, it would be a shame to leave such a nice boat in such dirty hands," Nick gave a vicious grin. Nami quirked an eyebrow before an equal grin split her face. It was both hot and terrifying at the same time.

    They quickly made a plan to liquidate the pirates of their physical assets by distracting them using Nami''s physical assets. If they were stupid, and there was a good chance they were, it should be a simple enough operation.

    As they approached Nami and Nick put their plan into action. Nick jumped into the ocean with a bag full of their supplies, and used the boat to hide from sight. Nami, meanwhile, put her considerable acting skills to good use, pretending to be a damsel in distress. She draped herself over the side and started breathing heavily.

    It was a good thing Nick was already in some cool water to distract his imagination from those hot, breathy moans she was making. He couldn''t be fighting pirates with raging hard-on after all. Think of the reputation he would get!

    Using anime physics, the pirate vessel slowly came to a stop beside their own ship till they were practically touching. How else could a boat propelled by wind come to a perfect stop exactly where they wanted it to? Or maybe Nick should never be put in charge of the helm.

    "Well, well, well, what do we have here? You need some help sweetheart?" said pirate NPC #1. And with that pathetic attempt at smooth talking, Nick went for a dive. Swimming under the boats, he made his way to the other side, completely unnoticed.

    Nami lifted her head to look at the pirates and had to fight her initial reaction of utter disgust. They were even uglier up close, and now she could smell them. They didn''t smell as bad as Nick when she first met him, but they clearly had a personal grudge against hygiene.

    "Oh thank goodness. I''m not dreaming am I? Such handsome men coming to my rescue. I almost can''t believe it''s real," Nami practically purred at them, silently laughing as they puffed their chests out. Men were so easy, just pay them a little compliment, stroke their ego a bit, and they were almost eager to be manipulated.

    "Oh it''s real babe. So tell me, what can us fine, upstanding gentlemen do for you this evening?" he questioned with a leer, gaze firmly on her heaving chest. Nami could practically feel the lust wafting off him, sickening her to her core.

    "Oh, well, if you could spare a bit of water, I would forever be in your debt. Please, I''ll give you anything. All my valuables are in that chest, it''s everything I own. You can have it if I can just have some water," Nami moaned out.

    The three of them gave her a greedy grin, "We''d be happy to help out such a beautiful dame such as yourself, but first, we need to check just what''s in that chest of yours. You don''t mind do you?"

    "Not at all, but please hurry. I don''t know how much longer I can last," she begged, bowing her head in "exhaustion". The three of them jumped onto her boat, eyes alight with desire.

    "No problem at all, this should only take a minute."

    Alarm bells started ringing in her head, but they were too late. One of the men grabbed her arm and yanked her to her feet, twisting her arm behind her. She gave a yelp of pain and surprise at the act, her previous facade broked.

    "Hey! What the hell do you think you''re doing?" Nami yelled, fear creeping in at the perverse smiles on their faces. This wasn''t at all how this was supposed to go. She tried to struggle free, but he was too strong.

    "What do you mean beautiful? We''re just checking out your chest like we said we would. That is what we agreed on right?" he smirked at her, eyes traveling to said chest. His hands slowly moving toward their prize.

    Nami growled at him,"Like hell it is!" and proceeded to kick him in the testicles. He squealed loudly and effeminately, grabbing his now bruised balls in pain, falling to the floor and shaking the boat.

    The one holding her grabbed her even tighter, making her cry out. His ball busted friend slowly got back to his feet on trembling legs. "You''ll pay for that you little bitch."

    As he once again reached for her chest, Nami closed her eyes in fear, "Nick, help me!" she desperately thought. Her prayer would soon be answered.

    Before the creep could defile Nami with his disgusting hands, a cold voice rang out, "And just what the hell do you think you''re doing?"

    Everyone turned to look at the new voice. Three of them in confusion and anger, and one in joy and hope. Standing there in all his Marine-esque glory, was Nick. Gun in hand, dripping wet, and pissed off beyond reason.

    Nami never thought she would be so happy to see him. The sun was behind him and his confiscated Marine coat was blowing in the wind. He was usually such a pain in her perfect ass, but right now, he looked every bit like her hero.

    "Huh, a Marine? Where the hell did you come from?" one of them asked. Nick turned his glare on him, making him gulp. But he was a proud member of the Buggy Pirates, and he would not be intimidated by a lone Marine.

    The one trying to molest his friend glared right back at him, "Listen pal, mind your own damn business. Unless you wanna get hurt that i-" his threat was cut short by the barrel of a rifle entering his mouth.

    "I asked you a question. What the hell do you think you''re doing to Nami?"

    All of them, besides Nami, started to sweat. Especially the one with a gun in his mouth. This wasn''t how they thought this day would play out. All they wanted to do was rob a few people, drink a few pints, and get laid. Sure the last part wasn''t consensual, but it wasn''t enough to kill them over.

    Right?

    "I''m waiting."

    The one who wasn''t holding a hostage or choking on something big and hard in his mouth, tried to placate the violent stranger, "Come on, it was just a joke. We were just playin'' around. Right guys?"

    The other two desperately nodded along, hoping this guy would believe them.

    "Oh, it was just a joke huh? I''m sorry. Well in that case, let me try one out. Knock, knock."

    "Uh, who-who''s there?"

    "Nick."

    "Nick who?"

    "Nick who''s giving you three seconds to let her go before your friend here becomes chum. One."

    They started panicking again. Even Nami''s eyes widened at that. Her companion didn''t seem the merciless type, but then again, she barely knew him. Or it could be one great big bluff.

    "Two," Nick cocked the hammer on the rifle, staring dead in the eyes of the man about to die, who started crying.

    "Last chance," Nick told them.

    "Alright, alright! Let her go Benny."

    Nami was finally released, and immediately ran to Nick, relief and gratitude dancing in her eyes in equal measure, "Thanks Nick."

    Nick gave her a small smile, "Anytime." Turning back to the Buggy Pirates, his glare returned full force. Now that Nami was safe, it was time to hit the old dusty trail.

    "Alright assholes, this is what we''re gonna do. My friend and I like your ship. Much roomier. So we''re going to take it. If you have any concerns about this transaction, please call our customer service hotline. Someone will be more than happy to answer any questions you might have. Thank you, and have a nice day."

    With that, Nick removed his gun from the guy''s mouth, much to his relief, and turned to his friend, "Alright, let''s get out of here."

    Nami nodded her head, and made ready to leave, doing whatever it is you need to do to get a ship moving. Seriously, they were completely still and nobody dropped anchor. Nick couldn''t for the life of him, figure out how these boats worked.

    Oh well, that''s what Nami''s are for.

    "You think you can just leave? Do you have any idea who you''re messin'' with?"

    Nami and Nick turned to the voice. It was Mr. Grabby trying to save face. Emphasis on trying, because he really wasn''t that intimidating, what with the smeared clown makeup running down his face from when he was crying like a bitch not even two minutes ago.

    "In order. Yes and a gay clown," Nick responde with a smirk, infuriating them. Shaking with rage, they charged, only to be stopped short by a gun they seemed to have forgotten about. These guys had the memory and intelligence of a goldfish.

    Once again facing down the barrel of a gun, only this time it was right between his eyes, Pirate Thug #1 could only stare cross eyes at it.

    "Wrong choice," Nick said before pulling the trigger. Thug #1 one screamed, but nothing happened. No loud bang, no caved skull, only a dull click sound.

    "Huh, guess the powder got wet," Nick mused. The pirate who almost died eyes rolled into the back of his head, pissed himself, and thankfully fainted. Poor guy would never live this down. It really wasn''t his day.

    Before the other two could react, Nick thrust the gun into the throat of the one on the left, making it so he couldn''t breathe. That should take him out of the fight long enough for Nick to take out the other guy.

    And it did. Flipping the gun over so he was holding the barrel, Nick spun and swung the gun, hitting the last pirate in the temple with the butt of the gun. He went down hard and fast into the sweet embrace of lala land. Now all he had to do was bash the other guy over the head and Bob''s your uncle. Luckily he still couldn''t breath, so it was a simple matter to finish the job.

    Nami sighed in relief now that the threat was taken care of. Looking at the three unconscious bodies, she was actually glad she sprung that lunatic from prison. As long as he never sang again, she was happy enough to have him along for the ride.

    "I guess that''s that. Let''s get out of here before they wake up," she said. Nick nodded, agreeing, and they quickly departed what looked like a crime scene. Don''t need those pesky Marines bitching at them.

    "Hey, can I ask you something?" she said, turning to Nick. He shrugged his shoulders, "Sure, what''s up?"

    Nami chewed on her bottom lip, which caught his attention. He hadn''t paid much attention to her lips before, seeing as how distracting the rest of her body was, but now they were all he could think about.

    Were they soft? Were they firm? What did they taste like? So lost in his daydream, he almost missed her question. He really needed to be more careful about that.

    "Would you really have shot that guy?" she finally asked. Nick had a feeling it was something like that. He imagined channeling his inner Batman could be quite scary, and he was glad he was able to pull it off. Intimidation worked a lot better if you were intimidating.

    "Honestly, I don''t know. I stopped them before they could really do anything, but if I had been too late, if they had done what they wanted to do, then probably. I doubt I''d have much in the way of mercy after that," he responded as seriously as he could.

    Nami seemed to think over his words, "I see. Makes sense I guess. Well either way, I really do appreciate it. So thanks again." She gave him a big, grateful smile that he was happy to return.

    "But since it was your fault this happened in the first place, I won''t be lowering your debt. Not one, single Beri," she said with a mischievous grin.

    Of course not, why would she? Nick grumbled to himself, ignoring her and her stupid smiling face, heading to the front of the boat to look at¡­ Fucking water and shit. Goddamn it was boring on a boat. Nothing to see for miles and miles and even more miles.

    Nami giggled as she went to inspect the inside of their little floating vessel. It would be Nick''s turn to laugh when he heard her squeal happily about treasure. Guess it might''ve been worth the hassle after all

 Chapter 3

    The sun was setting by the time the duo finally reached land. Nick''s ass had never been more sore. A whole day sitting in a boat with no cushions and absolutely zero lumbar support left him feeling ragged. Nami, who was far more used to this lifestyle, appeared as flawless as when they began. Life really wasn''t fair sometimes.

    Docking their ship the two intrepid thieves made their way into town. It was obvious from the beginning that something wasn''t quite right. There were no people.

    "Where is everybody," Nick asked. It was a ghost town. Completely abandoned. Hopefully it wasn''t a literal ghost town. That was something Nick wasn''t prepared for. His sleep paralysis demon was more than enough, thank you very much.

    "I don''t know. Probably hiding somewhere on the island till the pirates decide to leave," Nami said, completely unperturbed by the deafening silence. It wasn''t like it was the first time she had seen such a sight, and considering her chosen occupation, it wouldn''t be the last.

    Nick nodded as the two of them continued their walk, "Makes sense. Normies probably can''t take on pirates. Still, it''s pretty creepy."

    And it really was. Everything was still where it was abandoned. Food, clothes, various wares, all left behind. Thankfully, Luffy and Zoro should come by and take care of Buggy and his crew and the people can resume their lives.

    Spotting something on the ground, Nick stopped to pick it up. It was a teddy bear, probably some little girl''s favorite toy, if the pink ribbon were any indication. What made Nick grit his teeth was the dried blood on it.

    Nami stopped and watched Nick make an angry face. While her eyes were sad, various memories playing out in front of her, she couldn''t let them control her. She wouldn''t let them control her.

    "Come on. Let''s find someplace to rest and get some food. Then we can plan how to get the map," she said gently. This may have been Nick''s first time seeing such a thing, and while it was far from the worst she has experienced, her empathy well wasn''t so dry as to ignore his feelings.

    Nick grimaced, but nodded in agreement. Food and rest sounded good. Placing the teddy bear back on the ground, he swore to make them pay. Luffy and Zoro might never get the chance.

    Nick followed Nami as she stopped at a large, fancy house. It wasn''t a mansion by any means, but it was a step up from the surrounding buildings. Must belong to one of the wealthier families living here.

    "This should work," she said, stepping up to the door and opening it without a problem. Guess nobody thought to lock it as they were fleeing. Not like it would have stopped her.

    Stepping inside, they took notice of the trashed interior. Seems like the pirates have been here. Hopefully, they didn''t take the food. Or the beds.

    Luckily for the two of them, it seemed like they were more interested in the valuables rather than getting a good meal. There was bread, cheese, jam, smoked ham, and some fruits. It was easily enough for the two of them to fill their bellies.

    Nick''s stomach growled as they prepared their meal. He didn''t realize how hungry he was, and he would need the energy for the task ahead. After what seemed like untold eons, two full, delicious plates of food were ready.

    Nick sat down at the dinner table, ready and eager for food, while Nami took a short bathroom break, Nick waiting patiently for her to return before digging in. Several minutes later she was back, and it was time to eat.

    Taking the first bite, Nick practically moaned in ecstasy. What was this, Food Wars? Well as long as no tentacle pops out and starts fondling him, it should be fine. But if it fondled Nami¡­

    After the first few bites, Nick decided to ask a question, "So, why''d you choose this house?" He took a swig of water and watched her expression. He had a feeling why she chose this particular house and wanted to see if she would admit it.

    Nami stared at him and shrugged her shoulders, "It was the nicest house. That means they were more likely to have extra food laying around. Why do you ask?"

    Nick just gave a little grin, "Oh, no reason. Just curious I guess." The real reason is that the people who owned this house were better off than the rest, meaning some missing food wasn''t likely to hurt them very much. If they had taken it from a poor family, people who couldn''t afford much food, that could have much bigger consequences.

    Nami really was a big softy at heart.

    Said girl was staring at the smirking man across from her with a raised eyebrow. Just what did he find so amusing? Whatever, doesn''t matter. They had more important things to worry about then whatever stupid thoughts were bouncing around in his head.

    "Alright, I think it''s time we talk about how we''re going to steal that map," Nami said after finishing her meal. Nick looked at her and nodded, swallowing his last bite of food.

    "Right. First we need to know where they stashed it right? I saw their ship as we docked, think it could be there?" he asked.

    "Maybe, but I don''t think so. A map to the Grand Line is pretty rare, so I doubt he would let it out of his sight," she responded.

    "Hm, they''ve also collected a fair amount of treasure from this island too, right? If they stashed it somewhere beside their boat, couldn''t the map be stashed there?" he prompted.

    The two remained quiet for a moment, thinking. So far there were three possible places the map could be:

    1. With Buggy himself.

    2. On the ship.

    3. A secret stash on the island.

    Unfortunately there was no real way of knowing until they did some recon and the daylight was just about gone. It may have made stealth easier, but it made seeing a whole lot more difficult.

    "Ok so let''s plan for all three," Nami started. "If it''s on the ship we can just sneak on board and take it. Easy peasy. If they have a secret stash, we''ll need to follow someone who knows where and take it. And everything else." Her eyes turned into money signs at the thought.

    Snapping out of her daydream, with just a bit of drool on her chin, she continued, "But if it''s with Buggy himself, we''ll need some kind of distraction."

    "And I suppose that''s where I come in?" he asked, as she beamed at him. Figures. Well, nothing to it but to do it. Besides, he was looking forward to messing with them anyway.

    "Whatever. Before we put me in imminent danger, we should check the ship first shouldn''t we? Right before dawn should be a good time," he threw out there. Nami seemed to think about it for a moment before nodding in agreement.

    "That''ll work. Gives us plenty of time to rest and they should still be asleep. Who knows maybe we''ll find some good treasure on board too," she said dreamily. It was as adorable as it was greedy.

    "Alright, now that that''s settled, I think I''ll take a bath. I still have PTSD from my time in jail," Nick shuddered. The phantom stink clung to him even now. A permanent phobia etched into his psyche.

    "Wait just a second. Haven''t you ever heard of ladies first? You can take a bath after I''m done. I don''t want your sweaty boy germs infecting my bathwater," Nami said, standing and making her way toward Nick.

    "Oh I don''t think so. I''ll have you know I''m a true believer in gender equality. You can wait your turn like a good little girl," he responded.

    "What the hell does that even mean? If you don''t get out of my way I''ll fine you an extra 100,000 Beri," she yelled. By now they were in each other''s faces, and a good old fashioned Mexican standoff ensued. A bitter duel between sorta, kinda friends.

    If you find this story on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the infringement.

    Sweat dripped down their faces as they stared at one another, eyes sharp and ready for any sudden movement. Muscles tensed, and jaws clenched, they waited to see which one would make the first move.

    It was Nick! Using their closeness to his advantage, he exhaled sharply, blowing air into her face, forcing Nami to close her eyes and distracting her for a crucial second. He quickly sprinted out of the room and down the hall, only to realize something.

    He didn''t know where the bathroom was.

    Nami was hot on his heels, jumping on his back to slow his progress, not knowing Nick had no idea where the bathroom was. She "gently" strangled him as he tried to pull the crazy woman off of him.

    She might not be the strongest person in the world, but Nami sure had one hell of a grip! Nick could barely enjoy the feeling of her breasts on his back, what with her choking him and everything. That was not a fetish he had.

    Stumbling down the hall and trashing the interior even more, Nick managed to open a door, hoping to find the elusive bathroom, but alas, it was only a bedroom. This was a fatal mistake that would cost him dearly.

    "You don''t know where the bathroom is, do you?" she questioned him slyly. He could practically see the Cheshire grin on her face, the one the cat makes when it gets the canary.

    At least she wasn''t strangling him anymore, so there was that. But now she knew his dark and terrible secret.

    Jumping off of Nick, she shoved him into the bedroom with surprising force. Catching himself before he could faceplant, he turned around, only to see the still smiling, still sexy, figure of Nami. With a little wave goodbye, she slammed the door shut, and ran off.

    Nick tried, he really did, but Nami emerged victorious. It was all he could manage to find out where the bathroom was. The last thing he saw was a perfect, pillowy ass disappear into the room.

    He had lost. "I hope you choke on it!"

    Nami only laughed in response. The battle may be over, but the war had only just begun. They would have many more battles in the future, some he would win, some he would lose, and some would even end in draw, but the war would never end.

    That''s just how important being first in the bathroom is.

    Nick grumbled to himself, deciding he might as well explore the house. No reason to stick around. Who knew how long she would take. He made his way back toward the bedroom.

    As he entered the room, he noticed it was just as ransacked as the rest of the house. The bed was upturned, the dresser splintered, and the closet pilfered, clothes strewn about all over the place.

    Wait a minute, those clothes looked about his size, give or take. Getting a closer look, they indeed seemed about his size. Nick was sure they wouldn''t miss an article or two of clothing right?

    Meh, who cares. Finders keepers.

    Ruffling through all the strung about garments, he eventually found some he liked. An off white, henley style long sleeved shirt, with the sleeves pulled up to his forearms, and a leather vest with thick wool lining the inside. A pair of blue pants made out of a fabric Nick wasn''t sure, along with a nice leather belt. Dark brown leather boots completed his new look. They were a bit worn but fit so much better than the pilfered ones.

    All in all, Nick thought he looked good. Kinda like Han Solo actually. Better than looking like a Marine at any rate. There was probably a law about it anyway.

    He was keeping the Marine coat though. He didn''t give a damn if it clashed with his outfit, he earned that bitch.

    Heading back to the living room, he noticed a light coming from outside and a noise. It was loud and cheerful, sounding like a college frat party. It must be the pirates. Celebrating their ill gotten gains most likely.

    But this was good. If they were partying, that means they were most likely drinking. If they were drinking, they wouldn''t be at 100% the next day. Hungover pirates should be much easier to deal with than sober ones. He hoped they drank a lot.

    <hr noshade="noshade" size="1">

    "Drink up boys! That''s what our livers are for!" shouted a gruff voice. Cheers erupted at this proclamation. There was nothing better than a cold beer after a hard day''s work. A hard day of pillaging but a hard day nonetheless.

    The one who gave the order was none other than Buggy himself, in all his clowney glory. Clad in his red and white striped shirt, light blue pants, purple scarf, and orange coat, he certainly cut a¡­ figure. Not an imposing one, but uh, well¡­ There was an attempt.

    Not that anyone would tell him that. They wouldn''t live long if they did. Just like if anyone mentioned his nose. His big, red, perfectly round nose. Most people when first meeting the clown pirate assumed it was fake, part of his shtick. They learned the hard way it was real.

    And that Buggy was very sensitive about it.

    Downing a big glass of booze, Buggy sighed in content. This is what being a pirate was all about. Drinking, fighting, robbing, and more drinking. Something that goody, goody shanks didn''t understand.

    Well that wasn''t entirely true. Shanks sure knew how to drink, and he could fight. A little bit anyway. He was nothing compared to the great Buggy, in his not at all humble opinion. It was the last thing Shanks never understood. The final criteria for being a great pirate.

    Gold! Taking what belongs to other people for yourself. All things shiny and valuable. Adventure? Friendship? These weren''t things a real pirate craved. A real pirate desired one thing above all else, and that was treasure.

    And that was why Shanks would always be a failure of a pirate in Buggy''s eyes.

    Ugh, thinking about that red haired bastard was ruining his good mood. Speaking of treasure, Buggy''s mind drifted to his most recently acquired prize, a map to the Grand Line. He could finally leave the East Blue and pursue all the treasure he wanted.

    That was why they had been here partying for days now. It was a celebration of all the riches they were sure to find when they entered the Pirates Graveyard. And wasn''t that just a silly name? It was enough to make him chuckle. Buggy was immortal after all.

    "Captain, may I have a word?" questioned a voice next to Buggy. Turning his head away from his partying crew, Buggy saw that it was Cabaji, one of the leaders of his crew.

    Cabaji was a green haired man, with half of his head shaved and the other half covering his face. He wore no shirt, but had a long checkered scarf around his neck and a sleeveless trench coat on his torso. Clean white pants completed his ensemble.

    "Yes, what is it Cabaji? Speak," he commanded, returning his attention to the party. He watched in amusement as his crew juggle knives and breathed fire. They had put a lot of effort into their acts, and Buggy could appreciate the dedication.

    "I was just wondering how much longer you planned to remain here in this town?" he questioned. Not demanded, questioned. Buggy didn''t tolerate his crew demanding things of him, but he didn''t mind questions. As long as they weren''t questioning his orders that is.

    Grabbing another large mug of booze that his minion poured him, and boy howdy did Buggy love having minions, his thought over the question as he gulped it down. Cabaji waited patiently, knowing better than to rush his captain.

    "Hm, in two days. We''ll finish bleeding this town dry tomorrow and take whatever provisions we need. We can set sail the next day after one final party. One that will end in a flashy bang," he responded, his voice lowering and taking on a menacing tone.

    A small bead of sweat dripped down Cabaji''s head at his captain''s tone. He knew what that meant. The town would be subjected to their special Buggy Balls. A few of those and there would be little of the town remaining.

    Buggy jumped to his feet and thrust both arms into the air, "You hear that, boys! We leave in two days, so drink your fill tonight! If your head isn''t pounding by morning, you''ll walk the plank!" he shouted, to the cheers of his inebriated crew. Hell even Ritchie the lion was drunk, and dancing on the table. He was surprisingly graceful.

    The clown pirate sat back down as his crew began to party even harder. They were excited to be heading back out to sea. Taking over a town was fun and all, but they were pirates, and pirates longed for the open waters. A week of shore leave was more than enough.

    "Hey Cabaji, have those three idiots returned yet? They should have been back by now," Buggy asked. The green haired man thought for a second, "I haven''t seen them."

    Three days ago, Buggy sent three of his crew to attack a small settlement down the way, as punishment for shirking their cleaning duties. They drank the good hooch, threw up everywhere, then passed out in it. Normally, Buggy would have just killed them, but decided to test their worth.

    If they didn''t return by the time they set sail, he would hunt them down and give them a flashy death. Personally.

    Buggy''s thoughts of increasingly elaborate ways to commit murder became distracted by his minions'' conversations.

    "Man, I can''t wait to get to the Grand Line. Can you just imagine all the treasure we''ll find?"

    "Me too. It''s going to be great. I''ll follow Captain Buggy anywhere."

    "But you know, I''ve heard some seriously scary rumors about that place. They call it the pirate''s graveyard."

    "Bah! What are you a coward? As long as we follow the Captain we''ll be fine."

    "Yeah! Captain knows best!"

    At hearing this, Buggy''s hand began trembling in rage, "What did you say about my nose?"

    Everything seemed to stop. The music in the background, the dancing, the juggling. Everything came to a screeching halt. One by one, Buggy''s crew turned to face their Captain and the source of his ire.

    The man in question stared at him in fear, "I-I just meant that you''re really smart is all Captain! I wasn''t talkin'' ''bout yer-"Whatever he was about to say was cut off by something gripping his throat.

    The man grabbed desperately at his throat, trying to remove whatever was choking him. But it was to no avail. All anyone could do was look on in terror as Buggy used his Devil Fruit powers to slowly kill the man.

    "Tell me. Do you think my nose is funny now?" asked Buggy, using his power to lift the hapless man from the ground, like a Darth Vader cosplay. You know, if Darth Vader wore a clown suit.

    The man couldn''t say anything. His vision began to blur. He could hear the sound of a river, and the voice of his brother calling to him from the other side. Which actually made him less eager to depart to the afterlife, considering he owed his brother money. Probably why he was there in the first place.

    Then suddenly, he was dropped to the ground. Taking in deep gulps of air, he coughed and sputtered as he massaged his abused throat. Everyone seemed to sigh in relief.

    "Let this be a warning. Anyone who insults my nose will meet a flashy death. Got it!"

    "Yes Captain!"

    Good. That ought to keep those ingrates in line, thought Buggy. Slowly, said ingrates began to party once again, and the man that nearly died slunk off to who knows where to recover.

    Soon enough they would forget all about it and drink like there was no tomorrow. Their Captain ordered them to do so, and as God as their witness, each and every one of them would be hungover by morning.

 Chapter 4

    Nick was not a happy camper, no siree. After his defeat the previous night, Nami celebrated her victory with a two-hour long bath.

    Two hours!

    He tried to wait for her to finish, he really did, as he wanted to wash the salty grim off of him. Especially his hair. Who knew sailing got you so dirty, or the salty sea air was so bad for your hair. Nick knew. He found out the hard way.

    And he couldn''t even wash it out, because someone decided to take forever. After an hour and a half, Nick fell asleep on the hard, half broken couch. It wasn''t a pleasant sleep, and his back protested his choice of bed loudly and angrily.

    "I said I was sorry. Let it go already," Nami said, walking next to him. She glanced at him, admiring his new look, like a sexy outlaw. But not a pirate, never a pirate.

    Not a Marine either. It took some doing, but she eventually managed to convince him to leave the Marine coat back at the house. It was way too flashy, and they were on a stealth mission.

    Nick grumbled in response. She was one to talk. Not only did she get the bath, but she also got to sleep in a nice, comfortable bed. She didn''t know his pain!

    Actually, considering the size of her chest, she probably knew back pain personally. Totally worth it, in Nick''s opinion.

    They were sneaking around the abandoned city, using the light of the full moon to make their way toward Buggy''s ship. It was early, so early the sun wasn''t up. They had about an hour before dawn and wanted to make the most of it.

    Sneaking on board a pirate ship when the pirates were asleep was much easier than when they were awake. That was the plan they made last night and that was assuming there were any pirates still on board anyway.

    Thankfully they made it through the ghost town unimpeded. Nick wondered when the pirates finally stopped partying last night, or if they even had. They were loud enough that he could hear them across town.

    As they approached the harbor where they saw Buggy''s ship anchored, it was blatantly clear which ship belonged to the circus themed crew. "Gee, I wonder which one it is," Nick said sarcastically.

    It was a very thematic ship, complete with a big top. If the flag wasn''t a clear indicator of who this ship belonged to, that certainly was.

    They didn''t see anyone patrolling, which was good. Guards would have made the job harder. They were either asleep or passed out with the rest of their friends.

    Unfortunately there was no ramp. "So what do we do? Jump?" Nick asked, facing his companion. It was about a ten foot jump, not something he could have done in his own world, but with anime physics on his side, he just might make it.

    "Not much choice. Unless you want to take a dip and climb up the anchor rope?" she said.

    "I do not."

    "Then jumping it is."

    Both of them backed up to get a running start. Nami went first, easily making it on board. Seeing this, Nick began to hype himself up, "Alright Nick you got this. If she can do it, you can do it. If she can do it, you can do it."

    Running full boar, Nick took a massive leap¡­

    And nearly whiffed it. He grunted as his ribs impacted the railing. He would be feeling that in the morning. Oh wait, it was the morning.

    "Nami, a little help," he pleaded, quietly, as he held on to the side of the ship. He could feel his grip slipping. The wood was surprisingly slippery. Maybe it was the early morning dew clinging to the wood, or perhaps it was just because it was a ship on the water.

    "Geez, you''re hopeless. Is all that muscle just for show?" she griped, peering down at him.

    "Nami!" he whispered/yelled.

    "Alright, alright. Geez."

    With that, she grabbed him by the shoulders and pulled. She struggled a bit, considering he weighed around 220 lbs, but managed to help him on board.

    Huffing the two of them lay sprawled out on the cool deck, catching their breath.

    "Infiltration successful," Nick said, sitting up. He glanced at Nami, watching her take in gulps of air. Or more specifically, watching her chest. He was becoming more and more convinced they had a mind of their own. Why else would they move so much from simply breathing?

    "No thanks to you," Nami quipped, glaring at her accomplice. She expected more from him, considering how well he''s handled himself so far. Or maybe his only worth was fighting. If so, his presence here would only slow her down.

    "Well sorry I don''t have your mad hops," he groused. That was the farthest he''s ever been able to jump, and it wasn''t enough. The world was definitely making him stronger though. Another month and he''d be Captain America.

    Which was undoubtedly a good thing. Nick didn''t remember a whole lot from the show, but enemies don''t get weaker in anime. Today''s boss is tomorrow''s mook. He would need all the power he could get. He would protect Nami.

    And her boobs.

    He stood with a groan, and held out his hand for the beautiful ginger, a cocky smirk on his face "What are you waiting for? Let''s go rob a pirate."

    She stared at him for a moment, before a small grin lit up her face, "Now you''re speaking my language." She grabbed his hand and he easily hauled her to her feet.

    "Our best bet is the Captain''s quarters. I doubt a pirate like Buggy would trust his crew with his treasure," Nami stated, dusting imaginary dirt off her skirt. It wouldn''t be the first time that turned out to be the case. Turns out, most pirates didn''t trust each other, even ones on the same crew.

    Nick agreed, "Right, makes sense. Now all that''s left is to find it. In the dark." And wouldn''t that be a bitch and a half. They should have planned for this. They knew they would be searching the ship at night, so why didn''t they think to bring a lantern or something? They may have been able to see outside thanks to the moon, but inside would be a different matter entirely.

    "Ah, is widdle Nick afraid of the dark? Do you need to hold my hand?" Nami teased, holding out her hand. If she thought he wouldn''t call her bluff, she was dead wrong.

    Before he could think it through, he grabbed her hand. He didn''t really notice before, but her hands were soft and smooth, with a pleasant warmth. The night air seemed a little less chilly.

    Nami was surprised, "H-huh, what are you?"

    "You offered, right? Don''t tell me this is too much for you? Guess despite your appearance, you''re just a little kid at heart."

    Nami didn''t know if it was the taunt, the cocky smirk on his face, or a combination of both, but her pride wouldn''t let her back down. Giving her own smug grin in return she said, "Of course not. If that''s what you need so you won''t be scared, I don''t mind. Not one. Little. Bit."

    Emphasizing her point, she squeezed his hand even tighter. Both of them shared a light blush, but neither could see it in the dark. On that note¡­

    "W-well now that that''s settled, we still can''t see anything. So unless you glow in the dark, we''re still screwed," Nick said, cursing himself for his voice cracking at the beginning.

    But it was true. Unless Nami could see in the dark and holding hands let''s her share her cat burglar vision, they would need to find something to light their way. Giving her a glance, he was surprised by her, I know something you don''t know, grin.

    Maybe her boobs functioned like headlights? And twisting the nips turned on the brights. If so he was more than willing to operate her heavy machinery.

    "As it just so happens I suspected neither one of us could see in the dark. So¡­ I nabbed a lantern from that house. That should shed a little light on things."

    It would indeed, but Nick just had to wonder one thing. Where was she keeping it? He didn''t see it on her earlier. Granted it was still dark out, so he could have missed it, but with the jump they made to get on the ship and how close they were now, he should have been able to see it.

    Was this just another anime thing? Or did she hide it in her boobs? They were big enough, that''s for sure. Best not to think about it, and best not to ask. Just accept what is and move on.

    Even if he was disappointed that her boobs wouldn''t be illuminating their path. Oh well, he could dream.

    Quickly making their way toward the circus tent, they found out it was just a decoration, covering a wooden structure. In the center of said structure was the ship''s steering wheel. No treasure here.

    They then headed toward the large, circular building in the back of the ship. Nick opened the door and Nami lit the lantern. The light was dim, but they could still make out the room. It was a lounge area, with plenty of seats and a bar.

    Did you know this story is from Royal Road? Read the official version for free and support the author.

    The flickering light caused eerie shadows to dance along the walls. It was silent, except for the ocean''s waves. Nami was suddenly much happier about the warmth and comfort Nick''s strong, rough hands provided.

    That thought almost made her trip. Almost. Instead, she just stumbled a bit. Nick cast a curious glance her way, but she just shook her head. She definitely wouldn''t be sharing her thoughts at the moment. Besides, they needed to be quiet in case there were people on board.

    Just because they hadn''t seen anyone yet, doesn''t mean they weren''t there. Yep, that was the only reason. Nothing more, nothing less.

    Making their way through the building, they spotted another door in the back. Opening it, they discovered it led further down into the ship. Perfect. As quiet as a pair of mice, they descended into the bowels of Buggy''s ship.

    Reaching the bottom, Nami held her light aloft, illuminating their path. Several doors lined either side of a narrow hallway. At the end of the room was another door, more ornate than the others. That was most likely Buggy''s.

    As they made their way down the hall, they peaked inside some of the rooms that had opened doors. A storage room, cannon room, makeup and costume room, nothing of note in any of them. Unless you count some of the costumes.

    Who knew clowns liked to cross-dress?

    When they reached their destination, Nick tried to open the door, only to find it locked. "Looks like you''re up," he whispered to his companion. She nodded and moved to the door, only to realize she had a problem. They were still holding hands.

    "Um, Nick?"

    "Yeah? What''s up?"

    "Could you?" she asked, raising her hand. Oh right, he had completely forgotten about that. Was he really that comfortable holding her hand? Sure, she was lust (and greed) given form, but still, he barely knew her. So, was he really that comfortable with her hand in his?

    Yes, yes he was. And that wasn''t an emotion he was ready to deal with at the moment. Besides, it was probably just the emotional upheaval of multidimensional travel and his unresolved issues regarding it. Yeah, that had to be it.

    "Oh right. Guess you need this back huh? I''ll trade you for the light," he said. Neither one wanted to admit that they didn''t really want to let go, and once they did, felt a sudden chill that hadn''t been there before.

    Nick held the light up so Nami could see what she was doing. Like last time, he made sure to admire her¡­ skills in thievery. Her perky, voluptuous skills.

    It only took a few minutes, but every scrape of her lockpicks sounded like a gunshot. Geez being a thief is stressful. The last click, the one signifying her success in picking the lock, was the loudest of them all.

    As she swung the door open, she asked for the lantern back. Nick watched her enter first and saw her stop dead in her tracks. Curious as to what would make her react in such a way, Nick entered the room behind her.

    And what a room it was. Clowns. Clowns everywhere. Paintings of clowns, sad and happy, angry and¡­ horny? Ew¡­ There was one painting of two clowns just straight up fucking. Nick wasn''t sure he would ever achieve an erection again.

    The covers on the bed were decorated with red balloons. That set alarm bells off in Nick''s head. If IT popped out from under the bed, he was done. Game over, thanks for playing.

    On the table, dresser, and numerous shelves were dolls. Creepy fucking clown dolls, all lined up in a row, staring at them like they wanted to eat their souls.

    Buggy was one sick son of a bitch.

    Unconsciously, their hands drifted to one another, seeking some kind of comfort. It helped, but only a little. Nick wanted a bath more than ever. He felt dirty, unclean.

    The worst part was that they still needed to search the room, and neither one was looking forward to it. Who knows what other terrors awaited them in the lair of Buggy the Clown?

    They decided to check the table first, walking closer to each other than was strictly necessary. Looking over the papers on the desk, it was mostly circus routines and jokes. A few, more important documents, were mixed in with them. Things like how much food they had left, what towns they hit, things like that.

    The drawers were filled with miscellaneous items, like whoopie cushions, seltzer bottles, and fake teeth. They hoped they were fake anyway.

    As they continued to check the desk, Nami''s fingers traced a peculiar indention. "Hey, shine the light closer will you. I think I found something."

    Nick acquiesced, and Nami peered at it closely, fingers tracing the smooth, polished wood carefully. She couldn''t push it in, so maybe¡­

    Nami grabbed the spot and pulled. It came out with a smooth thunk. Next she tried twisting it, first to the right, then to the left. It turned counterclockwise a full 180 degrees. Nami then pushed it back in, and another thunk was heard.

    A secret compartment opened up, revealing a piece of parchment. Nami''s eyes lit up, "Yes, here it is! The map to the Grand-" She stopped her celebration short. Wondering what was on the paper, Nick leaned in. It wasn''t the map to the Grand Line, but it was something rather special.

    It was a treasure map. An honest to God treasure map. Well that was something alright. Looks like canon just got kicked in the teeth.

    "Huh, how about that? I don''t think Buggy will miss it, do you?" he asked the stunned navigator. Nami turned to him with Beli in her eyes, "Who cares what the clown thinks? This treasure is all mine now, hehehe."

    The giggling was creepy, and the even creepier decor of the room was not helping. Nick rolled his eyes at the greedy girl, "That''s great and all, but we still need to look for the map don''t we? Unless you''re satisfied with that one?"

    That snapped her out of it, "Of course not! I won''t even be able to find this treasure unless I can get to the Grand Line. That map is more important now than ever." She was sure fired up. The promise of riches was a real motivator it seemed.

    She also hid the map between her boobs. Nick couldn''t believe he was jealous of a piece of paper, but here we are. Life sure was funny sometimes.

    Nami reset the mechanism hiding the treasure map, but only after replacing the parchment with another piece of paper. It wouldn''t fool him if he checked the paper itself, but if all he did was check to make sure the paper was still there, it should buy them some time. Time enough to steal that treasure right out from under his big, red nose.

    The ginger haired beauty checked the rest of the room with a pep in her step. She no longer seemed bothered by the numerous clowns in the room. She even stopped holding Nick''s hand. And it was all that map''s fault.

    Nick sighed as he shut the dresser drawers, shaking away the murderous thoughts he was harboring for the map. Nothing but socks and underwear anyway. No matter how soft they may be, he wasn''t interested in Buggy''s hand-me-down undergarments.

    "If I was a psychotic clown, where would I hide my valuables?" he mumbled to himself. Looking around the room for anything that stood out, his eyes gravitated to the paintings. "He really has no taste. These are the tackiest things I''ve ever seen. Hm?"

    As he gazed at the paintings, one stood out. The singular piece of "art" that depicted clowns fornicating. It was so disturbing it made him want to look away. "And maybe that''s the point," he mumbled.

    Gathering up his courage, he approached the picture. Their eyes seemed to follow him, taunting him, inviting him to join them in their debauchery. He would sooner castrate himself then let them have his hole.

    Reaching for the frame, it felt wrong. Like everything that was once good in the world had vanished, leaving only corruption and despair. Was he being melodramatic about touching a painting? Yes, yes he was. Did he care? Not even a little.

    Grabbing onto the tainted thing, he gave a little pull. The painting swung open from left to right, revealing a safe. "Bingo. Hey Nami, I got you a present."

    Curious, she came over to see what he was yapping about, "What is it- A safe! You found a safe? Awesome!" She grinned happily as she jumped on him and wrapped her arms around his neck. He was so stunned by the move he barely got his own arms around her slender waist before she jumped back off of him.

    "Alright, just give me a minute. I''ll have this baby open in no time."

    Nick barely heard her, still in shock. Never did he know he needed something so badly and not know it until he received it. Her hug felt good. No better than good. It was like finding an oasis in the middle of the desert. And he was thirsty.

    It was also the first time he was able to smell her perfume. Like fresh flowers with a hint of citrus. A summer scent if ever he smelled one, and he found it to be his new favorite aroma. Now he just had to figure out how to sniff her and not get caught.

    Staring at her, he couldn''t help but notice how she looked while concentrating. Her face was scrunched up and her tongue was sticking out of one side of her mouth. It was cute. She idly licked her lips as she listened to the clicking of the safe as she turned the knob.

    After about a minute, Nami started to sway her hips back and forth to a tune only she could hear. Like a cat watching its prey, Nick''s eyes were laser focused, darting left and right in perfect sync with her shapely backside.

    "Ok¡­ Almost got it¡­ And¡­ Done!"

    At her proud exclamation, Nick was snapped out of his trance. The hypnotic spell cast by her perfect ass was broken. How long was he out? He remembers her start to sway her hips, left and right, back and forth¡­

    He snapped back to reality. Just the memory alone was enough to entrance him. "What a dangerous power¡­" he mumbled

    "What was that?"

    "Nothing! Uh, so, w-what was in the safe?" he stuttered. Nami narrowed her eyes in suspicion. He refused to meet her eyes, looking in every direction but hers. What was that about? Ah who cares, she has bigger things to worry about.

    "Let''s see¡­ Some Beri, that''s mine. A bag full of jewels, also mine. Buggy Balls? What''s that? Aw who cares. Wait, what''s this? A chest? Let''s just take a look shall we¡­" Nami snatched the small chest and tried to open it, only to find it locked.

    "Damn it. If you think this''ll stop you have another thing coming," she said, taking the chest over to the desk, and began using her level 10 thief skills to pick the lock. Something she''s been doing quite a bit lately. She''ll be a level 11 thief in no time.

    Nick, however, was more interested in Buggy''s Balls. Wait, that came out wrong. Buggy''s special cannon balls, the ones that blew up half the town. That''s what he meant.

    It was something he distinctly remembered from the show. That pathetic clown themed asshole had such a powerful weapon at his disposal, and to be frank, Nick didn''t think he deserved it.

    Looking at the sheet of paper with formula on it, he noticed it also had notes on how to make it smaller. Buggy called them Muggy Balls. It wasn''t complete yet, but if they found someone who could complete it, it should prove to be invaluable.

    "Ah ha, got it. Now let''s see what you were hiding," Nick heard from behind him. Looking over at Nami, he could see that she got the chest open. Inside was a rolled up piece of paper. When Nami unraveled it, her eyes lit up, "This is it! The map to the Grand Line!"

    She was practically bouncing up and down at this point. That was easier than expected. Nick expected to have to face Buggy, but maybe that wouldn''t be necessary. Does that mean they wouldn''t run into Luffy? That was kind of important.

    Oh well, no use thinking about it now. They got what they came for, so it was time to skedaddle. Before they made their daring escape, Nami decided to play a prank on the clown, and drew a picture of herself blowing a raspberry, then placed it back in the chest, and returned it to the safe.

    Buggy was going to be pissed, and Nick loved that.

    "Alright, we got what we came for. Let''s get out of here," she said. Nick didn''t plan to argue, and the two made their way out of the ship. As they reached the lounge area, they could see the sun was rising through the window, bathing the room in its warm glow.

    "Guess we don''t need this anymore," said Nick, gesturing to the lantern. "Guess not," she agreed, blowing it out. The two of them made their way across the room.

    "But hey, if you ever get scared of the dark again, I''ll be happy to hold your hand," Nick quipped, a bit of mirth in his eyes. Nami raised an eyebrow, "If I remember correctly, wasn''t it you who was scared of the dark?"

    "No, that doesn''t sound like me."

    "Oh please, you were practically shaking in your boots."

    "You must have me confused for someone else. I''ve never felt fear in my entire life."

    "Oh really? Guess you won''t need to hold my hand again. Too bad."

    "Let''s not be hasty¡­"

    The two continued to banter quietly as they walked, light chuckles escaping their lips. Distracted as he was, Nick was caught completely off guard when his face met the floor.

    "Ah fuck! That hurt," he complained. You''d think having more light to see would have made it easier to get around, but you would be wrong. It just made it easier to get distracted by the bombshell next to him.

    "You ok?" Nami asked, holding back a laugh. Did she find the pain of others amusing? Sometimes. But in this case, it was more the indignant squawk he made as he face planted.

    "Yeah. What did I trip over?" he asked, looking behind him. What he saw nearly gave him a heart attack. And Nami wasn''t far behind.

    It was big, furry, and none too happy to be woken up.

    "Nami?"

    "Yes Nick?"

    "Is that a bear?"

 Chapter 5

    Nami gasped for breath as she ran through the abandoned city. Her chest felt heavy, not only from the lack of oxygen, but also from emotional turmoil. What had Nami so distressed you may be wondering?

    She was forced to abandon her companion.

    After the two of them successfully snuck onto Buggy''s boat and retrieved the map, they ran into a little snafu. And by snafu, I mean a big fucking bear. Nick had tripped over the thing as they made their escape and woke it up.

    Things went downhill fast after that. Not only was the bear loud, it was surprisingly acrobatic. Who knew bears could do a backflip?

    Nick started fighting the thing, only to get bitch slapped into the bar. He was fine, mostly. He then started chucking booze at it, which just made it even more angry. But it was now doused in alcohol. Very flammable alcohol.

    I''m sure you can see where this is going. Nick set the thing on fire, which set everything else on fire. You might be thinking that setting it on fire would stop it, but you would be wrong. Oh so very wrong.

    This bear in particular seemed to be flame retardant. Maybe because it was a circus bear? Nami didn''t know, nor did she intend to ponder it at the moment.

    Now fighting an angry, burning bear was noisy. Very noisy. So, it should surprise no one that several of Buggy''s crew came to investigate. Apparently, the ship wasn''t nearly as vacant as they believed.

    Nick was in trouble, he knew it, she knew it, and frighteningly enough the bear knew it. Nami wasn''t aware that bears could grin so maliciously. She was learning an awful lot about them, not that she ever wanted to in the first place.

    Unfortunately for Nick, he was trapped. The bear had knocked him into the bar, which was on the side of the room. The exit, the one Nami was conveniently next to, was blocked by the bear, and the pirates were closing in on him from the other side.

    He was boxed in.

    So, he did the one thing he could think of at the moment. He told her to run. Nami could only stare in disbelief. This guy she barely met was willing to sacrifice himself for her. Why? It didn''t make any sense. She wouldn''t sacrifice herself for him, she knew that much for certain. There were too many people counting on her.

    Nick sent her one last smile before loudly challenging the pirates and the bear. She was almost certain he implied their mother''s slept with a variety of barnyard animals, and that was why they were so ugly.

    Strangely enough, it was the bear that was most insulted by that remark. Seriously, she knew nothing about bears before this day.

    Nami did the only thing she could do in that situation, run. At least that was what she told herself. Could she have brought out her ass whooping stick and show them why she called it that?

    Yes, yes she could have. But did she? No, no she did not.

    She ran. As fast as she could, trying the whole way to forget about his smiling face as she did so. It would be the last time she ever saw it and remembering it would only cause her pain.

    Eventually, she had to stop for a break, taking in large gulps of air as she did so. She was bent over with her hands on her knees, completely exhausted, both physically and emotionally.

    Looking up, the early morning sun illuminated the silent town, allowing her to recognize just where she was. She was near the docks, where her newly acquired boat was. The boat she acquired due to Nick. Well, due to his screw-up to be precise, but still technically due to him.

    "No, stop it! Don''t think about him right now! You got what you came here for, so just forget about him and get the hell out of here. It''s only a matter of time until they come after you as well."

    But try as she might, she couldn''t take a single step. Her legs shook with the effort to move, but she just couldn''t do it. She was stuck there, trapped by her own guilty conscience over a man she met barely a day ago. It didn''t make any sense.

    Logic and reason don''t get along very well with emotion. They tended to argue over every little thing. She knew, logically, that there was very little she could do to save her friend, not know and not back then. Even if she had decided to fight them, there was little doubt she would lose, her stick would be next to useless against a bear.

    Especially a bear on fire.

    Who was also a ninja.

    Even now, there was little she could do. Sure, she could try to negotiate for his release, using her pilfered items as a bargaining chip, but more than likely, Buggy would just kill them both. No, that was a risk she wasn''t willing to take.

    But she couldn''t leave him either. She closed her eyes in frustration. Damn it, what the hell was she supposed to do?

    "Well, well, well, what do we have here? Fancy meeting you again girly," said a voice in front of Nami. Opening her eyes, she was met with the visage of three pirates, that just so happened to look familiar.

    "Uh, who are you again?" she asked them. Ok, maybe they weren''t that familiar, but come on, she stole from a lot of different people, you can''t expect her to remember them all. Besides, they looked like generic background pirates so really, this was their fault.

    "You bitch! How could you not remember us!? We met yesterday! You stole our boat!

    Stole their boat? Oh, those guys!

    Oh, those guys¡­

    Nami crossed her arms around her chest, now remembering exactly who these guys were. They were the creeps who wanted to "inspect her chest." How could she have forgotten them already? She was just thinking about them. Her head was a real mess right now.

    "Seems like that sparked yer memory, eh?" one said with a lewd grin. His eyes stared unblinkingly at her ample, bouncy chest. His hands made squeezing motions unconsciously.

    Sometimes, being so beautiful was a curse.

    "Listen, I don''t have time for you creeps, so why don''t you just scram?" she growled. Could this day get any worse? First she lost Nick, and now she has to deal with these assholes. Come on!

    "I don''t think so sweetheart, you still owe us something. And we''re not leaving ''till we collect."

    The three of them began to advance toward Nami, as she backed up until she hit a wall. That wasn''t good. As she stared into the eyes of the would-be predators slowly surrounding her, filled with nothing but lust and vengeance, something in her snapped. Face twisted with she let loose a vicious snarl.

    And kicked the lead pirate in the testicles.

    "Ah, not again!" he wailed, bent over and clutching his bean bag in pain. It was so much worse than last time.

    Nami used his body and rolled over his prone form to get out of the encirclement. She was no longer surrounded by them. But her vengeance wasn''t over, her anger had yet to abate. So she kicked him in the beanbag, for the third and final time.

    As the searing pain reached his brain, he promptly vomited, shit himself, pissed blood, and passed out foaming at the mouth. His friends could only stare in shock, outrage, and enormous amounts of pity. For they knew, deep within their male hearts, he would never be able to use his penis again.

    Now enraged at their friend''s impotence, they drew their weapons and attacked in a blind fury. The first swung his blade downward toward the beautiful thief. Nami knew she wouldn''t be able to block, so she parried, using her three-piece bo staff.

    His swing went careening left, and Nami used the momentum to spin her body, and her stick, straight into the back of his knee, bringing him down to said knee. Then she spun in the opposite direction, and swung her staff into his face, making it so his next bowel movement included his teeth.

    "Alright, two down, one to go. I got this," Nami thought to herself, with a confident grin.

    Sill mad, but more cautious than his comrades, the third pirate advanced slowly, swinging his blade from left to right. Nami managed to duck the swing, and tried to jab her staff into his face, only for him to shift his weight, and dodge out of the way.

    They continued this for several more bouts, neither one getting the better of the other. Both were breathing heavily, staring at their opponent with caution. Then the pirate did something Nami didn''t see coming. He chucked his blade at her.

    With a panicked expression she managed to knock the blade away, only to realize it was a distraction. A realization that came too late.

    The pirate charged her, grabbing her staff. She tried to yank it out of his grip, but it was too strong. With a savage grin, he kneed her in the stomach, and flung her to the side. Nami couldn''t keep her grip and was forced to release her staff.

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    Coughing, she stared up at the pirate defiantly, even as he tossed her staff away. Her ankle was on fire. Hopefully it wasn''t broken, and only sprained. Ironically, it was the same foot that made sure that first guy would never procreate.

    "Just you and me now girly, your boyfriend ain''t gonna save you this time. When I''m through with you, that little shit won''t even recognize you."

    He advanced toward the girl once more, dark intentions clearly on his mind. His grin grew more sinister with each step. Nami could only stare in horror at what was about to happen. He reached for her, and Nami shut her eyes.

    "Nick¡­ Someone¡­ Help me¡­"

    As if by some miracle, a loud explosion rang out. And by loud, it was near deafening. Both Nami and the pirate stared at the source in shock. It came from the tent set up in the middle of town.

    "What the hell? That sounded like one of the Captain''s Buggy Balls. Ah who cares, I got more important things to worry about. You ready girly? I''m gonna show you what a real man is. Wait, where did she go?"

    Nami had used the momentary distraction caused by the blast to stagger away, hobbling down the road as quickly as she could. Her foot was on fire and felt tight against her boot. It was definitely swollen.

    She turned into an alley littered with debris. Damn pirates make a mess wherever they go! Now she had to be extra careful, she couldn''t afford to trip and fall.

    "Don''t think you can get away from me! When I find you, I''ll make you wish you were never born! Once I''m done with you, I''ll take you back to the crew, and they can take turns breaking you! Do you hear me!"

    Nami did her best to drown out the threats. It wouldn''t do to dwell on what could be, and she would make damn sure it never came to pass. She shuddered just thinking about it, all those yellow, scurvy ridden teeth, smiling as they took turns with her. She was sick just thinking about it.

    She made her way through the alley, making sure she didn''t go in a straight line, wanting to make her capture as difficult as possible. It wasn''t doing her ankle any favors, but it had to be done.

    Turning another corner, her eyes widened in horror at the dead end. Shit, shit, shit! This wasn''t what she needed right now. Turning quickly, she made her way back the way she came. Unfortunately, in her haste, she did the one thing she didn''t want to do.

    She tripped.

    She yelped as she fell, a loud clinging noise ringing out through the otherwise silent town. She had tripped on a can and sent it down the alley in the absolute loudest way possible.

    Her eyes widened, and she held her breath, hoping he didn''t hear it. But it was not to be.

    "I''ve got you now!"

    Nami sprung to her feet, wincing in pain as she did so. She limped as quickly as she could, forgoing stealth entirely. It was now a mad dash out of the alley to find a place to hide.

    But once again, fate was not on her side. Eventually, she came to another dead end, the alleyway filled with trash and broken things. The pirates must have dumped it here for some reason. What that reason was, she didn''t care. She only cared that it was in her way.

    Knowing she couldn''t turn back; she began to climb. The adrenaline having numbed the pain in her foot she quickly ascended. She winced as she cut herself on something sharp but ignored it in favor of escape.

    Just as she reached the top, and freedom was in her grasp, her progress was halted by a sharp pain in her ankle. Her bad ankle. Screaming in agony, Nami looked down, only for her eyes to widen in horror.

    "And just where do you think you''re goin''?"

    Gripping her ankle tightly was none other than the pirate she was fleeing from. His crooked, yellow teeth on full display as he grinned maliciously at her.

    Doesn''t this guy ever give up? Take a hint already!

    "Ah!" she screamed as he threw her to the ground, the exposed parts of her arms and legs scraping along the ground painfully. She struggled to get up, her whole body reeling in pain.

    "This was fun and all, but it''s time to give up. Don''t worry, you''ll come to enjoy it, I promise. Hehehe."

    He approached her with big lumbering steps. He wasn''t bothered at all by her hostile look, in fact, he seemed to enjoy it. The withering glare he sent her way thrilled him. He couldn''t wait to break her rebellious spirit.

    Just as he was a few feet away, and her fate seemed certain, a loud noise interrupted them once again. It wasn''t the deafening sound of a cannon this time however, it sounded more like a person screaming.

    Looking upwards at the source, both of their eyes widened in shock. A person! There was a person falling from the sky. But more importantly than that, he was heading right for them.

    The goon made to get out of the way, but before he could take a single step, the other person barreled into him like a falling meteor. A massive cloud of dust erupted from the impact site, and Nami was flung several feet away.

    Groaning in pain once more, she managed to get into a sitting position. Waving the dust away with a small cough or two, she could see a silhouette standing in the cloud. But who was it? The pirate, or the stranger?

    "Hoo, that was close. I thought I was a goner for sure. But what did I land on?"

    It was the stranger! Nami watched as he seemed to dust himself off, and placed an old, straw hat on his head. He looked down and blinked in confusion for a moment, before his eyes went comically large.

    "Oh crap! Hey are you ok? I didn''t mean to land on you. Say something!"

    Nami watched with a sweat drop as he grabbed the pirate and began shaking him furiously, trying to wake him up. Part of her was hoping he broke his neck. The other part was hoping for the same thing.

    After a few moments he seemed to give up, sweat dripping down his face. He has yet to notice Nami at all.

    "Oh man, he''s dead. I didn''t mean to kill him. Guess there''s just one thing to do. Hide the body, just like Dadan taught you."

    If he really was dead, that was no skin off her back. She was just disappointed she wouldn''t be able to diss out justice herself. Honestly, he got off lucky.

    Nami watched in amusement as the kid, who seemed to be about her age, dragged the body over to the pile of garbage. He grabbed the top of the pile by stretching his arms and pulled, easily burying the evidence of his supposed misdeed. Well, if he wasn''t dead before, he certainly was now.

    She could only stare in wonder at what she just witnessed. How did he stretch his arms like that? Did she really see that, or was she hallucinating? Or could it be a Devil Fruit? She''s heard of them before but has never seen one in action.

    Her mind drifted to Nick, and an idea popped into her mind. If this kid had powers, maybe he could help her. Maybe she could save him after all. She just needed to convince this guy to help.

    How hard could it be? Most men were more than a little eager to help her after all, why should he be any different?

    At least the path was clear now. Well not clear exactly, but enough so that even she, with her bum leg, should be able to make it through without too much difficulty.

    He wiped his hands in satisfaction of a job well done, and turned around, only to finally notice he has an audience. His sweat seemed to return as he stared at her, not saying a word.

    Nami was able to get a good look at her mysterious savior. He has messy black hair, black eyes, and a distinct scar under his left eye. He was wearing a red vest with blue shorts, and sandals. And on top of his head was that old straw hat.

    All in all, he looked like a country bumpkin.

    Without saying a word, the straw hat stranger turned around and booked it the other way. "Hey wait! Agh!" Nami yelled. She tried to stand, only to fall back down from the stabbing pain in her ankle.

    The new guy heard her cry of pain and stopped, turning around to look at her. She was grabbing her ankle, eyes scrunched up in anguish. Actually, she looked like she was in pretty rough shape all around. He wondered what happened to her.

    "Hey, you okay?" he asked. Nami opened her eyes in surprise, seeing the guy now just feet from her. She was so distracted by the throbbing ache in her ankle, that she didn''t hear him approach. That wasn''t like her. She was really off her game today.

    "Do I look okay to you?" she snapped grumpily. The boy only stared at her with a blank expression. Whether or not he was offended by her tone she couldn''t tell.

    Nami sighed, irritation leaving her body. It wouldn''t do to piss him off, not when she needed him, "Sorry, I''ve had a rough day. Thanks for your help. I really do appreciate it." She gave him a dazzling smile.

    He looked at her in confusion. He didn''t remember helping her. What was she talking about? Is she stupid or something? He tilted his head in thought, using all of his brain cells to puzzle out the problem he was unknowingly given.

    Nami narrowed her eyes at the individual in front of her. She didn''t know why, but she was suddenly irritated at him. A loud growl distracted both of them from their thoughts.

    To Nami, it sounded like a wild animal, hungry and ready to pounce. Her panicked eyes darted every which way, trying to find the threat. The growl sounded out again, allowing her to finally pinpoint its location.

    It was coming from the boy, who was clutching his stomach. "Ah¡­ I''m so hungry," he wailed, slinking to the ground. Nami only stared for a moment, completely flabbergasted that a human stomach could make that noise.

    With a shake of her head she offered to feed him. "Really!" he shouted, jumping to his feet in excitement. Nami nodded her head, "Yeah, you did save me after all, so it''s the least I can do. I''m Nami by the way."

    He still didn''t know what she was talking about, but he wasn''t about to turn down free food. He gave her a big, toothy grin, "Shishishi, I''m Luffy. Nice to meetcha!"

    <hr noshade="noshade" size="1">

    A few minutes earlier

    Buggy growled, dropping the henchmen he had used as a human shield. That bastard they had caught sneaking around his ship was more slippery than he thought. Even after all the torture they put him through, he was still able to escape. Worse than that, was the humiliation of having his own weapons, his precious Buggy Balls, used against him.

    He would make him pay, of that Buggy was certain. It would be slow and agonizing. His death would not be flashy, it would be a warning to all who dared to cross him.

    "Find him! I want him brought to me alive, do you hear me?"

    Most of his crew, the ones that weren''t dead or unconscious, groaned in response. Useless, the lot of them. Was there no one he could rely on?

    "Allow me Captain," said a voice behind him. Buggy turned to see who had spoken, "Ah, Mohji, good to see you aren''t as worthless as the rest. But I hope you know I won''t tolerate failure."

    Buggy left his threat hanging in the air, knowing by the fearful expression on his underling''s face he had received the message loud and clear. He truly did love the fear he could inspire.

    "Of course, Captain, I won''t fail you. Come Ritchie, we have work to do," Mohji shouted with barely a frightened stutter. Out of the rubble emerged a massive lion. His once pristine fur was singed and matted, and he was pissed about it. Ritchie was a very vain lion, you see, and took great pride in his fur, so he was eager to seek revenge.

    Mohji jumped on top of the lion, "Now Ritchie, find his scent. He can''t have gone too far." The lion complied, and began sniffing around the rather large bloodstain. They could just follow the blood trail, it was rather obvious, but on the off chance he was able to hide, they didn''t want to risk losing him. Neither of them wanted to suffer their Captain''s wrath.

    After a moment or two, Ritchie had the scent, and the two of them leapt off the building. Buggy watched them go with eager anticipation. Soon, he would have that little bastard back in his grasp.

    "Captain, are you sure it was wise to trust Mohji with this task?" questioned Cabaji, who stepped up beside his Captain. Buggy just turned his eyes toward him, noticing he barely had a hair out of place, "I''m not worried. He knows what will happen should he fail me."

    Cabaji nodded, fully aware of what befalls those who fail. It wasn''t pretty, but it was flashy. He then turned to the Wheel of Death, the same one they had their most recent prisoner shackled to. Blood was still splattered against it, telling a tale of an unknown horror.

    "Hard to believe this mess was caused by a falling bird," he mentioned, squatting down to look at the broken wheel, a clearly dead bird underneath the wreckage. He could hear a grinding noise behind him. Turning to see what it was, he paled when he noticed it was his Captain, grinding his teeth.

    The clown stared at the offending creature with hate. The bird''s neck was broken. Not surprising given the landing it made. But what was surprising, was that its neck was turned a complete 180 degrees. Someone, or something, had twisted the bird''s neck. It was dead long before it ever reached the ground.

    Whoever, or whatever did this, was going to pay. Right alongside that other bastard. Buggy would make sure of it.

 Chapter 6

    Nick smiled as he watched Nami run away. He hated to see her go but loved to watch her leave¡­ Shaking his head to clear his thoughts, this was not the time to be thinking about honky tonks or badonkadonks.

    He gazed at the angry pirates in front of him and the even angrier bear. That was still on fire. Did it not care that it was on fire? Was it even aware of it? What kind of bear is this?

    Questions for later, right now he needed to survive. Though that was looking like quite the tall order. Five assholes and a bear walk into a bar¡­

    There was no punchline, that was just the situation he was in.

    "So, you ready to die asshole?" asked one of the pirates. He was a big, fat thing, shirtless and hairy, with a tattoo of a heart with "mom" written in it. It was gross and sweet at the same time.

    "Listen, fellas, I think we got off on the wrong foot here. So why don''t we just take a second, put the bear out, and we can talk this out like gentlemen," Nick replied. He thought it was a perfectly reasonable request, and put rather eloquently. He did, however, forget that he was talking to pirates. Reasonable and eloquent aren''t words they know.

    "The only thing that''ll be getting off is me when I catch that sexy bitch of yours," said a different goon, this one tall and lanky, with eyes just a bit too close together. That made them all laugh, and the fat one''s man tits jiggled like a pair of breasts Nick was oh so fond of.

    He would need therapy after this. Jiggle therapy with Nami as the therapist. But Nick couldn''t pay for the session so he would have to find another way to compensate her.

    Ok, so Nick could understand the thirst for Nami, having been hypnotized more than once already by her, so he wasn''t upset that these jagoffs wanted to bang her. No, that part he got. What pissed him off, is the thought of them forcing themselves on her.

    That he couldn''t let stand.

    "Maybe if you''re lucky, we''ll keep you around long enough to watch us fuck her-" the pirate was cut off by a loud bang, a sound they were all too familiar with. It was the sound of gunfire.

    Looking at the source, they could see the intruder with a smoking pistol. The one who was talking stared downward, noticing a rather alarming amount of blood coming from his chest. And then the pain hit, causing him to stagger backward, before falling on his back, never to rise again.

    "I ain''t no cuck asshole. And none of you motherfuckers are going to lay a finger on Nami."

    The remaining three assholes and a bear could only watch in shocked disbelief as one of their own was killed. Should Nick feel bad about what he just did? Take the life of some random dude for threatening to rape Nami in front of him?

    Maybe, but he didn''t. He recalled the conversation he had with said girl the day before, when she asked if he really would have killed that guy. Guess he had his answer now.

    "Jimmy! You''ll pay for that you son of a bitch, he owed me money!" yelled the third pirate. Seems like there was no love lost between them, only a debt. Nick hoped he didn''t think he was going to actually pay in his stead. Just because he killed the guy, doesn''t mean they could saddle him with his debt.

    Nick wasted no time and opened fire, causing the three remaining pirates to roll out of the way. They kicked over a table and hid behind it. But they were the least of his problems, because Mr. Bear took that moment to charge.

    Which gave old Nicky boy an idea. If the three stooges over there thought they could hide behind a table, he was going to dissuade them of that notion. By means of an angry bear.

    The bear reached him and took a swipe, one that was thankfully well telegraphed, because it was much faster than you would think. Nick decided to name the bear Beary Allen, the fastest bear alive.

    Mimicking the pirates, he rolled out of the way, with only the heat from the burning fur reaching him. "Nice try, Beary! Hey, did your mama bear fuck a sloth, cause you sure are slow."

    That made him mad. Beary charged again, even faster than last time. Seems he was sensitive about his mother. But that was just what Nick wanted. With a grin, he ran right toward the hiding pirates.

    Jumping over the table, he gave a jaunty wave, as they looked on in confusion. Which quickly turned into fear and pain as the bear easily smashed through the table, and them along with it.

    Screaming as they were knocked away, Nick continued to lead the bear on a merry chase. Ok merry might not have been the right word, because if that bear caught up to him, he was a very dead Nick. And he wanted to avoid that.

    But what was he supposed to do? How in the hell was he going to beat a bear? Punch it in the nose, like a shark? Doubtful, so let''s call that Plan C. He really hoped plan A would be better.

    Plan B was to shoot the shit out of it. However, knowing bears from his world, it would be next to useless. He''d most likely run out of bullets long before the bear even noticed it''d been shot. The damn thing was still on fire after all.

    "Think, think, think! There must be something you can do!" he thought frantically. Nothing was coming to mind however. His only hope was to escape. That settles that then. Plan A was to run like a bitch.

    It was at that moment the bear decided to remind him that he was a circus bear, by jumping high into the air, and attempting to bodyslam him.

    It was all he could do to dive out of the way. And not a moment too soon either. Had he been even a split second slower, he would be buried under bear taint. That wasn''t how wanted his death to be recorded. Could you imagine, walking up to the Pearly Gates, Peter opening his book, and laughing hysterically at how you died? Like that bitch Aqua?

    No thank you.

    He took that opportunity to fire several shots into the bear, and like he thought, it did fuck all nothing. Actually, that wasn''t true, it did piss off Beary even more. How that was possible was a mystery, as he seemed pretty pissed off before.

    Didn''t matter. What did matter, was that he had an even angrier bear trying to kill him, and he could only dodge for so long. Every swipe he evaded, every bite he avoided, sapped his dwindling energy.

    It was only a matter of time. Beary didn''t seem to be slowing down at all. It was the opposite in fact. Almost like Nick''s exhaustion spurned him on. Was Beary a sadist? Sure seemed like it. Nick might have asked him that, if he wasn''t too busy gasping for breath.

    Stamina, work on it. Duly noted.

    After several minutes, several long and excruciating minutes, Nick''s luck ran out. He tripped over a beer bottle, and landed face first on the hardwood floor. That was the second time he face planted in this room, and he would be damned if there would be a third.

    Beary seemed to have the same idea. With a savage, condescending smirk, Beary climbed onto the bar counter. Nick watched as he stood on two legs, and made a pose, like a wrestler about to dive bomb somebody.

    Nick hated wrestling.

    Standing on shaky legs, and getting his breathing somewhat under control, Nick faced his opponent head on, with a defiant glare. He wouldn''t go quietly into the night. He would kick and scream and bitch and moan the whole damn way. Hell, he would even bite if he had to.

    His opponent seemed to take his defiance as a personal insult. Kind of like the jokes he made about his bear momma. What sensitive creatures they are.

    With a roar, Beary jumped into the air, somersaulting like a diver at the Olympics, and prepared to body slam him once again.

    Nick had no choice now. Plan A: Run Like a Bitch, not happening. Plan B: Shoot the Shit Out of Him, pissed him off. That only left him with Plan C: Punch the Bear in the Face.

    So that''s what he prepared to do. He gathered all of his remaining energy into his fist, and readied his ultimate attack¡­

    "Shoryuken!"

    As the bear plummeted toward him, Nick used all of his strength and uppercutted the damn thing. However, as it turns out, Nick was not Ryu, and Beary was a 900 pound fucking grizzly bear.

    The result?

    K.O! You Lose!

    Nick was now barely conscious underneath Beary Allen, who was finally no longer on fire. That was painful, and humiliating. Good thing there was no one around to see this.

    "Good job Beary!" exclaimed a muffled voice. A voice muffled by bear taint. God damn it, he forgot about them. He thought they had been knocked out by the bear''s rampage, but apparently not.

    Wait, the bear''s name was actually Beary? Huh, how about that.

    On that note, Nick was once again made into a prisoner. This time by pirates, and not the marines. Somehow, he doubted it would be any better. At least he wasn''t killed by getting tea bagged by a bear, so heaven would have to get their yucks from someone else.

    Ah who was he kidding, he was going to hell.

    So now here he was, hands tied behind his back and staring at a very angry clown. Being a prisoner to pirates should be scary.

    Should be.

    But they looked so fucking stupid! Sure clowns could be creepy, but these guys were basically the opposite. They were utterly ridiculous. So while Nick should be scared of the obviously angry and hungover pirates, he just wasn''t.

    "So, what do we have here? My men say they caught you sneaking around my ship. Care to explain yourself?" Buggy questioned in a menacing voice. It was clearly an octave or two lower than his normal tone. Something Nick picked up on.

    "Did you practice that voice in the mirror?" he questioned the clown pirate. Said pirate''s eye twitched in irritation at his remark.

    "Oh a comedian are we? Luckily for you, the Buggy Pirates love a good laugh. What''s black and blue, and red all over?"

    Nick turned his head at the question, "Hm, that guy?"

    Buggy and the rest of the crew turned to see who he was talking about. Turns out it was a dark skinned male in a blue and red outfit.

    "You think you''re funny you little bastard!?"

    "But I thought you said you like to laugh?"

    "Does it look like I''m laughing to you!?"

    Buggy leaned back in his chair, breathing angrily. He rubbed his face in irritation. Kids these days, no respect. Oh well, that just meant Buggy would have to teach him. For his sake, he''d better be a quick learner.

    "Captain Buggy, we found this on him," said one of his lackeys, handing him a piece of rolled up paper. Was he one of the guys on the ship? He couldn''t remember. Getting smacked by bear testicles really did a number on him. That was not a sentence he ever thought he would ever say.

    "Hm, what''s this¡­ Wait, this is¡­ You little thief! Did you really think you could steal from me!?" Buggy screamed, spittle flying into Nick''s face. Something that was completely uncalled for. How could a pirate get mad at someone for stealing? The pot has met the kettle everyone.

    "Uh, well¡­ kinda yeah," Nick shrugged. He absolutely thought he could steal from him, and he would have gotten away with it too if it weren''t for those meddling pirates.

    Buggy''s started seeing red. Nobody steals from Buggy the Clown and lives. Nobody. "I see. And just what were you planning on doing with my balls, huh?"

    Everyone stopped and quieted. You could hear the crickets in the background and their mocking laughter. The worst part was that Buggy didn''t seem to realize what he just asked. Or more precisely, the way he asked it.

    "Uh you want to try that question again chief?" Nick asked. Buggy looked confused for a second, likely going over what exactly it was he just asked. After a moment, his face went red.

    "Not like that you little twerp! You know what I meant!"

    Nick just laughed at him. His face was almost the same color as his nose, how could he not. Was it the best idea to laugh at the even angrier, clearly psychotic clown? Probably not, and yet, he couldn''t stop himself.

    Even the rest of the crew were trying to hold it in, if the choking sniggers could be believed. And Nick believed every single one. So did Buggy, if the apoplectic look on his face was to be believed.

    "Enough! You tell me right now what you were doing on my ship and who you were with or else!"

    "Or else what?" Nick questioned with a smug look on his face. This right here, is the moment he screwed up. You see, Nick forgot something, or perhaps he never realized it in the first place. These are pirates. REAL pirates. Though they may look stupid, they were in fact very dangerous.

    Something Nick would find out soon enough. With a smug smile of his own, one filled with condescension, "You''re about to find out. I think it''s time we played a little game. What do you think, men!?"

    The rowdy pirates cheered with enthusiasm. Well that doesn''t bode well.

    "What game do you think we should play with our new friend huh? How about¡­ Pin the Tail on the Asshole!?"

    The pirates cheered again.

    "Oh I know! We could make him Bob for Bombs!"

    Once again, the pirates cheered. Ok this was getting old.

    "Time out! Party foul!" Nick yelled out, getting everyone''s attention.

    "Oh what''s wrong, tough guy. Getting wet feet? Belly turning yellow? Well it''s too late. If you would have just told me what I wanted to know, I may have given you a flashy, painless death. But now you''ll suffer."

    Nick rolled his eyes, "It''s not that. It''s just¡­ you want to stick things in my ass and make me put something in my mouth that will blow its load. I''m starting to think you have a thing for me, and I''m flattered! Really! It''s just I don''t swing that way. I prefer big-tittied red heads. Sorry."

    The quiet was back, and even the crickets remained silent. If a pin were to drop, you''d be able to hear it. Actually Nick could hear something. So could everyone else in fact, as they all started to search for the sound. The only one not looking was Buggy.

    Giving him a look, that''s when Nick saw where the sound was coming from. It was his veins. Buggy was so mad, Nick could actually hear his veins popping as blood rushed through them. You''d think he''d pass out from that, his blood pressure must be through the roof.

    "So you don''t want to play those games? Fine then. I have one that I just know you''ll love¡­ Wheel of Death!"

    The tale has been taken without authorization; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.

    The once quiet pirates started cheering louder than before. Whether it was because they were genuinely excited or because they wanted to appease their boss was anyone''s guess.

    A few ran off out of sight, only to appear a few moments later, rolling a giant wheel thingy. To Nick it looked like one of those magician wheels where they strapped someone into it¡­ and threw knives at them.

    Oh crap baskets.

    Nick tried to struggle out of the goons grip, but it was to no avail. His hands were tied, literally, so all he could do was make their job just that little bit more difficult. It may have been petty, but damn did it feel good.

    But all good things come to an end. Nick was forcefully shackled to the wheel. That would have been bad enough, but the clasps holding him had spikes on them, covered in rust and dried blood.

    So now not only was he about to be impaled by various pointy objects, but he also had to worry about tetanus. This just wasn''t his day.

    "Ngh," Nick grunted in pain, gritting his teeth, doing his best not to scream as his arms and legs were pierced by the shackles. Blood poured down and coated the wheel. Drop by drop, it created a pool of red beneath him.

    "Not so tough now are ya, gyahahahaha!" Buggy mocked him, laughing along with the rest of the crew. Nick groaned in pain, his lips moving, but no sound came out. Noticing this, Buggy leaned in, hand cupping his ear in order to "hear" him better.

    "Hm, what was that? Speak up, will you."

    Panting, in more pain than he had ever been in before, Nick managed to say, "Go¡­ fuck yourself¡­ you big¡­ red nosed¡­ dick waffle."

    Buggy growled, grabbing Nick by the jaw, "You know, I''m getting real sick of your attitude. I think it''s about time I teach you your place." Say what you will about his fashion sense, but Buggy had one hell of a grip. Something poor old Nick was discovering first hand.

    "Fuck, it feels like he''s about to break my jaw. Isn''t he like, the second villain? Is he supposed to be this strong?"

    Eventually, Buggy released him and turned to address his crew, only to spin around and punch Nick in the nose.

    "Gah, fuck!" he yelled, blood spurting from his nose. Was it broken? Nick didn''t think so, but it still hurt like hell. He was starting to get concerned about the amount of life giving liquid he was losing. And the amount he was going to lose.

    "Gyahaha! Now who has a big red nose?" Buggy laughed. He was starting to enjoy himself, but he knew the best was yet to come. "Alright boys, line up! Let''s make this a flashy execution!"

    With big stupid grins, they lined up one by one, each eager to play their little game. Nick was not as eager. One might even suggest he didn''t want to play at all. Too bad he didn''t have a choice in the matter.

    The first one stepped up. It was the fat one from the ship. At least he was wearing a shirt now, so that was an improvement. No one wanted to see that. Hashtag, manboobs are not real boobs.

    Holding up an alarmingly large knife, he prepared to throw it at the source of his current ire. Not only was he woken up early, but he was also bruised and battered from a charging bear. And it was all his fault, so he was eager for some revenge.

    Only for him to be stopped by Buggy himself, "It''s good to see you so eager, but this is a game remember? And games have rules." With that said he pulled out a handkerchief and tied it around tubby''s eyes.

    "Listen up! The torso is worth 1 point, legs are worth 2 points, arms are 3, and if you manage to poke out an eye, that''s 10 points. The person with the most points wins a flashy prize. Just remember to have fun! Now, give him a spin!"

    Nick suddenly found himself spinning around and around, the blood covering the wheel splattering every which way. This only seemed to encourage them however. Bloodthirsty pirates were bloodthirsty, who knew?

    Chubs Mckinsey raised his blade and took aim, as well as he could with a blindfold on anyway, and chucked the knife at the hapless Nick. It sailed true, and struck the wheel, barely missing a leg.

    Nick released a sigh of relief, glad that there wasn''t a blade sticking out of him. But looking out at the sea of pirates, as best as he could while spinning anyway, he doubted his relief would last forever. There had to be at least 30 of them and sooner or later, someone would get lucky, and Nick just had to hope they didn''t hit anywhere vital.

    Pulling off the blindfold, Fatty appeared crestfallen that he didn''t impale his victim, "Ah man¡­"

    Buggy chuckled, "Ah too bad. Better luck next time. Now, who''s next?"

    One by one, they each took a turn. At first, everything was going fine for our hero, as every blade seemed to miss. Though some were too close for comfort, and one nearly made him eunuch.

    But on the sixth throw, his luck finally ran out, "Agh!" he yelled, as searing hot pain raced through his body. Cheers erupted from the pirates as someone finally hit the target, knife firmly planted in his right shoulder.

    "And Jensen is on the board with 1 point. Can anyone top that?" exclaimed Buggy, fully enjoying the show. Nick came to a stop, as everyone examined the hit. His fellow crewmates patted him on the back for being the first to earn a point. He probably wouldn''t win with that single point, but he was still the first to get one, and that was worth celebrating.

    "Don''t stop now, who''s next!?" said Buggy to his eager crew. He was glad to see this little game bring them together. Those happy smiles as they tortured a man nearly brought a tear to his eye. This was what being part of a crew was all about. Well, this and treasure, can''t forget about the treasure.

    "And how is our guest of honor? Are you ready to beg for your pitiful life yet?" questioned the pirate Captain as he approached his victim. Nick glared at him in response, eyes glowering in defiance, "Go fuck yourself you circus reject."

    Buggy only chuckled in response, "We''ll see just how long that bravado of yours lasts." With that, he gave the wheel a fierce turn, the game beginning again. The next in line was blindfolded and ready to go.

    As Nick began to spin again, trying his best to ignore the thumps of near hits, he wondered if this was where he would die. To Buggy the fucking Clown of all people. Possibly the lamest villain in all of One Piece. Ugh, that would suck.

    His mind drifted to Nami, the fine and sexy, wondering if she made it away safely. He has yet to hear anything from chuckles the assclown, but who knows. She could be dead in a ditch or sleeping with the fishes, and all this was for nothing.

    Was he simping? Maybe a little, but come on, it was Nami! As long as he didn''t turn into that pervy cook, he should be fine. Now that guy was a simp with a capital S. As long as he was still a lower case simp, it would all turn out ok.

    That was when another sharp bout of pain reminded him of where he was. It wasn''t as bad as the last time, but now his left leg felt like it was on fire. The knife didn''t make a direct hit, but his leg just below the knee was sliced open. He let out a swear, much to their amusement.

    Which number was that? Ten or eleven? He should really pay more attention to the people trying to murder him in this festive manner. But thinking of the sexy, orange haired navigator seemed like a much better way to spend his time.

    Especially if these were his final moments.

    Number 14 hit him in the right bicep, 3 points.

    Number 17 hit him in the right thigh, 2 points.

    Number 23 hit him in the left side, 1 point.

    Number 25 was a fucking lion who thankfully missed the target completely. He was too big to throw a knife and used a big ass sword instead.

    Number 28 got him in the head for a whopping 10 points. Thankfully Nick was able to turn his head to the side and avoid losing an eye, but the one who threw the knife was still given full points, since he would have taken it out.

    With that the game seemed to be over, and they had a winner.

    "Congratulations Vinny, you win!" Buggy shouted, as screams of joy erupted from his crew. "Next time we raid a village, you get first pick of the treasure! Gyahahaha!"

    That seemed to excite them, as normally it would be the Captain who gets the best goodies. He couldn''t keep all the treasure of course, that was a good way to cause a mutiny, but he could keep the most valuable. Hell, it was practically expected. No one becomes a pirate to be a pauper after all.

    "Now then, what to do with you?" he questioned, staring at the bleeding and barely conscious Nick. He grabbed him by his dirty blonde hair and yanked, pulling his head up and causing him to grunt in pain.

    "Well? Any ideas?"

    Nick glared at him before spitting a glob of blood in his face. "I thought I told you to go fuck yourself," he wheezed out.

    Buggy growled, kicking the beaten man in the stomach, "You little bastard." Nick coughed and spat up blood and bile. He was already dizzy from the spinning and the blood loss, getting kicked in the gut didn''t help matters. At least he didn''t hit the knife that was still embedded in his side, that would have sucked.

    As Buggy stood there staring hatefully at the man, Cabaji came up and offered a suggestion, "Captain, if I may? Why not use the Buggy Balls? I believe that would be a fitting and¡­ flashy end. After all, he was caught stealing your formula for them"

    The clown pirate considered that for a moment, before a big, wide grin it up his face, anger nearly forgotten. "You know Cabaji, you''re right. That would be the perfect, flashy end to this troublemaker. Alright, bring out the cannon! Will put an end to him, and this town at the same time! Gyahahaha!"

    His crew hurried to obey his orders, wheeling out a large, black cannon that looked recently polished. Along with that, one of them was carrying a red cannonball slightly bigger than a man''s head, painted with the symbol of the Buggy Pirates.

    As they pointed the cannon at Nick and loaded it with a Buggy Ball, Buggy turned to the soon to be dead man, "So any last words before I blow you to flashy bits?"

    Nick only stared at him for a moment. So this is how he would die, tortured and exploded during the second arc of an anime that had, like, a million of them. Guess he should have known he wouldn''t make it, he wasn''t even meant to be here after all. He would just be another victim, lost and forgotten to time.

    Was he scared? Absolutely. He didn''t want to die, especially not like this. Maybe as an old man, peacefully in his sleep. Or perhaps being choked out between Nami''s legs. Now that would be a way to go.

    But if this is how he was going to die, he''d be damned if he gave Buggy or his goons the satisfaction of seeing him afraid. So instead, he gathered up a lifetime''s worth of courage, and gave them a savage grin.

    "Yeah. I''ll save a spot for you in hell Buggy, so don''t keep me or the devil waiting too long."

    They seemed awe stricken by my last words. Or perhaps dumbfounded. It could be anything really, doesn''t matter. I said what I said and that''s that.

    For Buggy, it wasn''t the words that shook him. In that moment, for the briefest of seconds, he saw the face of his Captain, Gol D Roger, in place of Nick''s, staring his death in the face without an ounce of fear. It only lasted a moment, and as convincing as he was, Buggy saw through the facade, and recognized the fear held in his eyes.

    This boy was not his Captain, not even close. A bead of sweat dripped down Buggy''s face as he calmed his nerves. It was a good thing he was getting rid of the punk now, as Buggy felt, somewhere deep within himself, that this man in front of him would become a problem in the future.

    So Buggy would snuff out that future.

    "As far as last words go, that wasn''t too bad. Credit where credit is due, I suppose," Buggy commented with the smallest of quivers. "But this is the end. Time for you to die flashily!"

    After saying his piece, he lit the fuse. Time seemed to slow down as Nick watched the sizzling fuse cheerfully count down to his demise. Sparks and flames shooting out as brightly as a welding torch. Soon it would all be over

    "Hey, what''s that!?" yelled one of the clown pirates. Looking up they all noticed something falling out of the sky. Something rather large and heading right toward them. With a startled cry, they covered their eyes as it crashed into Nick, dust and debris flying everywhere.

    They watched in stunned silence, the only sound the sizzling of the fuse, as the dust blew away, revealing a standing silhouette. As the dust completely settled, the silhouette revealed itself to be none other than Nick, free from his bondage.

    Nick pulled out the knives, grunting, as their bloodstained forms clanged on the ground. It was painful, yet at the same time, satisfying. Now all he needed to do was escape them. The question was, how? Well, how did they do it in the anime? Oh right, Zoro flipped the cannon.

    That would do. That would do nicely. He turned to face them as his breath settled, a viscous smile on his face, "Round two, bitch."

    He charged, but not at the crowd of stunned pirates, but at the cannon. He needed to hurry, the fuse getting shorter and shorter with each passing second. Why they decided to use such a long fuse, Nick didn''t know, nor did he particularly care, he was just thankful for their thoughtful stupidity.

    10 seconds¡­

    Nick reached the cannon, groaning as he gripped the underside of the barrel, and began to use all his strength, or what little was left, to try and flip it over. He cursed as the cannon barely budged, "Come on, you heavy son of a bitch, move!"

    9 seconds¡­

    Buggy seemed to realize what he was trying to do, and with a panicked shriek, ordered his men to do something, "No! He''s trying to flip the cannon! Stop him, shoot him!"

    8 seconds¡­

    His men seemed to snap out of their stupor as they opened fire. Bang after bang rang out, but none seemed to find their mark. One came close, as it ricocheted off the cannon and grazed his cheek, causing a small trickle of blood to leak down his face.

    Nick ignored the stinging sensation in favor of completing his task. That task being, blow Buggy and his merry band of assholes to kingdom come.

    7 seconds¡­

    It wasn''t working, the cannon was just too heavy for his weakened form. So far, he''s only been able to move it a few inches. But what else could he do? If he just made a run for it, they would either adjust the cannon so he died in a ball of fire, or they just hunted him down, and he died with even more pointy objects inside him.

    Neither of those options appealed to him. He needed to distract them, and the cannon was his best bet. It worked in the show, it will work here. If only he could get it to move. There had to be something he could do, but what?

    Suddenly, he remembered something. Something from a game he played long ago. It was the final boss, and he needed to throw a boulder into a volcano. He didn''t remember why exactly, but he did. The main character, however, wasn''t strong enough on his own, so he resorted to an alternate method.

    He punched it. He punched the boulder until it finally moved. It didn''t make sense then, and it doesn''t make sense now, but Nick was out of ideas, and out of options. There were precious few seconds left, so what did he have to lose?

    So with a great roar, he punched it. Much to his shock, it seemed to work, as the barrel lifted a few inches. That knowledge spurned him on, giving him a burst of energy.

    6 seconds¡­

    Buggy stared at the man as he punched the cannon, bewilderment gracing his features. Who punches cannons? What the hell was wrong with this guy? It seems his instincts from before were right, this guy needed to die, and he needed to die now. There were enough crazy people in the world, it didn''t need another one.

    "Give me that you useless lump!" he yelled, grabbing a pistol from one of his goons. A goon that looked on the verge of tears from the reprimand. Poor guy had his wittle feelings hurt.

    Buggy took aim and fired, just once. But that was all he needed. Unlike the rest of his crew, Buggy''s shot flew true, striking Nick in his side. Causing him to drop to one knee, doing his best to prevent the scream that threatened to escape his lips.

    He was only partially successful.

    5 seconds¡­

    "Gyahaha! You see that? Take notes boys, that''s how it''s done!" Buggy cheerfully exclaimed, as his crew cheered with him. Nick was not nearly so impressed. The bullet in his side was thankfully stopped by his rib, which hurt like a bitch, but at least it didn''t pierce something more vital.

    Like his liver. He needed that for drinking. But a broken rib wasn''t doing him any favors either. Every breath was agony, and he was breathing hard. That wasn''t even the worst part. No, the worst part was that the cannon was back in its original position. What little progress he made was nullified in an instant.

    Not to mention how aggravating Buggy''s mocking laughter was. Him and his whole joke of a crew. Hearing that just made Nick angry, numbing the pain, giving him his third wind, and pumping even more adrenaline into his veins. Nick knew he would have to make the best of it, because he doubted he would get a fourth.

    4 seconds¡­

    With a mighty roar, he sprung back up, hitting the cannon with his shoulder, using all his pissed of strength. In that instant, the cannon returned to where it was before he was shot.

    Not good enough. He needed more. Drawing on strength he didn''t know he had, he began punching the barrel once more, each uppercut more powerful that the last. Inch by desperate inch, the barrel raised.

    3 seconds¡­

    Buggy''s eyes bugged out of his skull as he watched the man furiously punch the shit out of his cannon. If this continued, he might actually be able to do it. Perhaps it wasn''t the best idea to put a cannon on a stand that can be flipped over. Something to think about.

    Just not now. Now he needed to make sure they didn''t get blown to hell. Buggy wasn''t that eager to see his old Captain again just yet. "Hurry you lazy bums! Stop him, stop him!" he yelled in panic.

    2 seconds¡­

    He was so close, just a bit more, and Nick would finally flip this damn cannon over, and end Buggy once and for all. Probably¡­ Maybe¡­

    But he was running out of steam again, his third wind running out of air. Cheap bastard! Beyond that, he was pretty sure his hand was broken, or at the very least, his fingers. Cannons were not meant to be punched; he was finding that out the hard way.

    He just needed one more push, one final punch, and this ordeal would be over. But could he do it? That was the question. Should he do it was another. After all, he didn''t belong in this world, there was no telling what his interference would change. Maybe it would be better if he went out in a blaze of glory, right here, right now.

    ¡­Nah! Fuck that! He wanted to live, and if canon didn''t approve, then canon can suck his hairy left nut. He would see this vast new world he found himself in, explore all of its riches, experience all of its joys and sorrows, and nothing, especially not this two-bit clown pirate mother fucker, would stop him.

    He just needed to reach deep inside himself, find that thing that would push him further past his limits than he has ever been. His eyes closed, Nick did just that, finding the very essence of who he was, finding that spark that would take him to new heights.

    And that''s when he saw them. Bathed in an ethereal morning glow, swaying gently in the breeze, and jiggling with a hypnotic rhythm, were Nami''s boobs. More tantalizing than a double bacon cheeseburger, and more beautiful than any piece of art, they beckoned him forward.

    "You can do it," they said, "We believe in you."

    That was all the motivation he needed.

    1 second¡­

    Nick snapped his eyes open, his body glowing faintly with power yet unknown. He yelled to the heavens, so primal, so fierce, it would make even Vegeta feel pride in someone else.

    "What the hell is going on!?" yelled Buggy in confusion, as a violent gust of wind appeared from nowhere. No, that wasn''t quite right, it appeared from that half dead twerp. He was drawing on a power Buggy hasn''t seen in years.

    Haki¡­

    And not just any Haki, the kind only one in a million had. The kind that brought kings low and tamed the sea. It was a power reserved for those with the will of a conqueror.

    But how did this nobody have it? Who the hell was this guy?

    "Hey Buggy!"

    That yell interrupted his train of thought, and he turned to the source, only to see it was the very same person he was thinking about, wind raging around him, and a strange light emanating from his body.

    A light that seemed to focus itself on is fist. That couldn''t be good.

    "Tell the Devil to save me a spot would ya?"

    "No! Wait!"

    "Shoryuken!"

    0 seconds¡­

    With a mighty uppercut, one that actually worked this time, the cannon finally flipped over. Just in time too. As it thunked against the ground, facing Buggy and his compatriots, it let loose a bellow, followed by a truly massive explosion. Nick''s ears would be ringing for a while.

    He just hoped it wouldn''t result in tinnitus.

    Nick stared at the wreckage for a bit, regaining his breath. The whole top half of the building was gone, along with all of the carnival decorations they had. Good riddance, that shit was tacky with a capital T.

    The whole ordeal really took its toll on him, his labored breathing finally evening out. His hand was busted all to hell, and he now had several holes in him that he didn''t have before. But it wasn''t over quite yet. He still had to escape and find his beautiful, busty companion.

    "Now if I were a Nami, where would I be?"

    Sighing as the adrenaline finally left his body, leaving him more tired than he could ever remember being, he turned to face the city. Somewhere out there, Nami was waiting, and what kind of gentleman keeps a lady waiting?

    But before he could find a way to climb down, he noticed something peculiar. A person, or something that appeared human, was falling from the sky. It crashed into an alleyway on the opposite side of town.

    Could that be Luffy? The blood loss and fatigue made it difficult to remember exactly what happened in the anime. Add in the fact that he hasn''t watched the show in years made his assumption a 50/50 at best.

    Oh well, not like he has any other clues to go on. And if it really was him, then there was a good chance he ran into Nami. Destiny was funny like that. Path decided, Nick carefully made his way off the roof.

    Time to see what fate had in store for him.

 Chapter 7

    Nami stared at the straw hat boy across from her with a combination of horror and disgust. Even Arlong had better table manners than this kid, and she had seen him eat a tuna raw. Bit it in half with one bite, and yet it was still less repulsive than the scene before her.

    Not exactly something she liked admitting. Any credit to that fish faced asshole was too much in her opinion.

    "So, you said your name was Luffy, right?" she asked him, as more and more food entered his mouth, making his cheeks balloon so much it would make a squirrel jealous. Just where was he putting it all?

    Luffy made a sound of confirmation, before choking on a bone. He beat his chest furiously trying to get it to go down, before deciding water was the best way to go. Taking big gulps, downing the glass in seconds, he let out a relieved sigh as the bone finally dislodged itself and he could breathe again.

    And if he could breathe, he could eat.

    Nami groaned as she watched this, wondering if she had made a mistake. She needed this guy''s help to save her friend, but so far, he just seemed like an idiot. Then again, so did Nick. Perhaps it takes an idiot to save an idiot.

    Seeing as the boy was too preoccupied to hold a civil discussion, Nami turned to look out the window, in the direction she knew the pirates were located. She could see smoke rising in the air, most likely from that huge explosion from earlier. Was Nick even still alive?

    The thought of him being dead left a sour taste in her mouth, and made her stomach churn. It shouldn''t, considering she barely knew the guy, but still her stomach tied itself in knots. Maybe because he was willing to sacrifice himself for her with a goddamned smile on his face, just like¡­

    Just like Bell-m¨¦re.

    Was that it? Was that why she was so hung up on this? Because the last time she saw him, and the last time she saw her, they were both smiling, letting her know it would be alright? That everything would be ok?

    Because it wasn''t! It wasn''t ok at all! Nami was sick and tired of people sacrificing themselves for her. How many more people would die because of her weakness?

    After her mother died, all she could think about was how to honor her death. No, that wasn''t completely true. It was more to honor the life she gave to her and her sister, Nojiko. Without Bell-m¨¦re, they would have died on whatever island they came from.

    Bell-m¨¦re always said that it was them that saved her, that they were the reason she found the will to live. But Nami, even now, had a hard time believing it. Nojiko and her were a burden, a never ending expenditure. Food, clothes, housing and so much more, Nami knew she owed that woman a debt she could never repay.

    Which was another thing she couldn''t stand, being in someone''s debt. Because of what she felt she owed her mother, Nami had joined the very pirates that killed her in order to try and buy back her village from them, and her eight long years of suffering began.

    And now she felt she owed Nick, something she shouldn''t as she had saved him from the Marines when they first met, but that took no great sacrifice on her part.

    Well, besides the smell that is.

    But he was willing to die so she could escape. While they both saved each other, the value of the rescue was totally different. She had to deal with an eye watering, fly killing stench, and he¡­ Well she didn''t know exactly what he had to deal with, but she could guess. Pirates weren''t known for their kindness or mercy, especially if you''ve been caught stealing from them.

    Perhaps it was the unknown that really bothered her. Not knowing his fate, if he was alive or dead, or what they could have done to him. What they could still be doing to him. It allowed her mind to wander to increasingly violent scenarios, and her foot began to tap in nervous agitation.

    "Hey, are you ok?" questioned a voice.

    "Huh?" she asked, forgetting for a moment the boy was there. He was staring at her with a bone sticking out of his mouth, gently nibbling on it. What the hell was he, a dog?

    "You''re crying," he stated simply. Nami''s eyes widened, and she promptly rubbed them, finding that they were indeed wet. She could even feel the remnants of her tears as they streaked down her face. When did that happen?

    "Yeah, yeah, it''s nothing. Just some dust in my eye," she responded, once all the tears had been removed. Luffy said nothing, he just kept staring at her.

    "So, like I was saying earlier, there''s something I wanted to ask you," Nami said, back in business mode. Luffy stared at her for a moment, before chomping down the bone he was chewing on, "Oh yeah? What''s that?"

    "First, how did you make your arms stretch like that earlier?" she asked. Luffy seemed to perk up slightly at the question, "That? That was just my Gum Gum powers," he said as he idly shoveled more food into his mouth.

    "Gum Gum powers?" she asked, while at the same time wondering how he could still be eating. Luffy had already eaten enough for five men, and he was still going. At least he wasn''t inhaling it like a starved wolf anymore, but she still had to wonder at where it was all going.

    "Uh huh. I ate the Gum Gum Fruit, and now I''m a rubberman, see," he said, as he pulled his cheeks in one direction, stretching it a couple feet. Nami could only stare flabbergasted.

    Devil fruits were real? She had heard the stories of course, from random sailors to the fishmen who kept her enslaved, but she didn''t really believe it. Until now, she had never met anyone who had powers, so part of her thought that maybe they were all lying to her. She wouldn''t put it past Arlong afterall.

    "So it''s true¡­ Devil fruits really do exist," she muttered to herself. Luffy only stared as she mumbled to herself, thinking about how weird she was.

    "In that case, you might just stand a chance. Listen, I need to ask you for a favor," Nami stated, a small note of desperation in her voice. Something that Luffy picked up on. And since she fed him, he could at least hear her out.

    "A favor?"

    "Yeah. You see, a friend of mine was captured by Buggy. I want to save him, but I''m not strong enough to do it on my own. If you help me, I''ll owe you one. How does that sound?"

    Luffy cocked his head to the side, and closed his eyes in concentration. It looked like it hurt. "Owe me what?" he asked after a few moments, causing Nami to sigh. This guy clearly wasn''t the sharpest tool in the shed, was he?

    "Whatever you want. You need something stolen, I''m your girl. Just don''t get any funny ideas, got it?" she warned. He didn''t look like the type that would try and take advantage of her, but you never knew. The stupid ones could be harder to predict than the smart ones.

    "Hm¡­ No thanks," he said, before he stood up getting ready to leave. Nami panicked for a moment, "Wait a minute!"

    Luffy stopped in front of the door, turning back to Nami with a look of annoyance on his face, "What now? I don''t need you to steal anything for me."

    Nami glared at him for a moment. For some reason she took it as a personal insult to her skills. Whether or not he meant it that way was irrelevant. Everybody wanted something, she just needed to figure out what he wanted.

    "Are you telling me you don''t want anything? Money, jewels, information? There''s really nothing that you want?"

    "It''s not that I don''t want anything. It''s just that what I want can''t be stolen."

    "Oh, and what''s that?"

    Luffy gained a gleam in his eyes, as he told her his dream with a conviction Nami had rarely heard before. In fact, she''s not sure she has ever heard someone with as much belief as him.

    "I''m going to find Roger''s treasure, the One Piece, and become King of the Pirates."

    The beautiful cat burglar could only stare in shock. The One Piece? Really? The greatest treasure in the world, the one that spawned the age of piracy, and the one that countless other pirates have sought after for years, this scrawny nobody wants to find it?

    Nami didn''t know if he was delusional or if he was just that stupid, but there was one thing she was sure of.

    "So that means you''re a pirate?" she asked, eyes colder than ice.

    "Yeah huh," he responded cheerfully, not able to read the room even a little. Nami clenched her fists, as they trembled with rage, her mind returning once again to that fateful day. The day when everything changed. The day she met Arlong. The day Bell-m¨¦re¡­

    She shook her head to clear her mind. It wasn''t the time to dwell on the past. She needed to be here in the present, she needed to keep a clear head.

    "And how many do you have in your crew? Or is it just you?" she asked quietly, her rage dropping from a boil to a simmer.

    Luffy gave her a big grin, "Two so far. I just recruited an awesome swordsman who uses three swords. Cool huh? Now I just need a musician and I''ll be all set. Say, do you know how to play music?"

    "Hell no!" Nami screamed, taking Luffy aback. He wasn''t sure why asking that upset her so much. Maybe she had an awful singing voice, like Ace. He was pretty sensitive about it too. Yeah that must be it.

    "I hate pirates. The only things I care about are money and tangerines," she continued, breathing heavily. She eyeballed the straw hat wearing pirate with anger, who only continued to look confused.

    "I thought you said you wanted me to save your friend. Doesn''t that mean you care about him too?" Luffy asked, bringing Nami up short. That was¡­ true enough, she supposed. She certainly didn''t want him to die, not like this, not by clowns.

    "That''s¡­ I just owe him one ok? Don''t look into it too much," she finally said, having calmed down. "Sure, whatever you say," said Luffy, not caring one way or the other.

    Nami sighed, before an idea came to her mind. If he wanted to find the One Piece, that means he would need to go to the Grand Line, and wouldn''t you know it, she just happened to obtain a map on how to do just that. That was her leverage, that was what he wanted.

    "If you''re after the One Piece, that means you''re going to the Grand Line, right?" she asked, just to confirm. And to lead the conversation in the direction she wanted.

    "Yeah, that''s right," he said, somehow finding an apple and eating it whole. Nami shivered at the sight and the glutton''s appetite. Did his stomach even have a bottom? Or was it also made of rubber, so it can stretch as far as he wanted it to.

    "Well, it just so happens that I have a map TO the Grand Line. I''d be willing to take you there, if you help me out," she said coyly. She knew she had him by the excited twinkle in his eye. Hook, line and sinker.

    "Whoa, really!?" Luffy exclaimed. He was laughing to himself, glee written all over his face. "That means you can read maps right?"

    "Uh, yeah. I can do more than just read them. In fact, you won''t find a better navigator around, guaranteed," she stated proudly, standing with a smug certainty. It wasn''t arrogance talking either, she really was the best, hands down.

    Ok, she was a little conceited, but it was also true. She was the best, and she knew it.

    "Alright! I got a navigator!" Luffy yelled joyfully, hands raised in triumph.

    "It''s only temporary! Hey are you listening to me!?"

    ***Line Break***

    Nick groaned as he slowly walked down the alley. He was using the wall for support, using the hand that wasn''t broken from punching a cannon, and leaving bloody handprints along the way. Man he had a lot of blood. Too bad most of it was on the outside now. That probably wasn''t a good thing.

    Help support creative writers by finding and reading their stories on the original site.

    Oh well, nothing he could do about it now. Now he needed to get away from those circus freaks before they invited him to another party, because their last one sucked. It sucked hard.

    He let out a grunt of pain as he stumbled over something. Was that a hand buried under a bunch of rubble? How did that get there? You know what, he didn''t want to know. It wasn''t his business, and he had better things to do right now.

    Like not dying, but that was looking less and less likely as time went on. Every step was made on shaky legs, every breath came out ragged, and everytime he blinked, the world started spinning. Man he was fucked up. It reminded him of Tijuana.

    But that''s a story for another time.

    Ignoring that, Nick finally exited the back alleys of the town, coming to a large open square. Well that was unfortunate. The walls were really helping him not fall on his face. Oh well, he would just have to nut up and crawl if he had to.

    "Alright Nick, you can do this. One foot in front of the other. How hard can it be? Easy peasy," Nick said, trying to hype himself up. It worked to a certain extent. His first step, while shaky, was solid enough to keep him on his feet.

    His second step was much the same. So was his third, his fourth, his fifth, etc. But eventually, the sheer exhaustion caught up with him. Every step took several seconds before the next, his knees wobbling like he was in freezing weather.

    Sweat dripped down his brow as he soldiered on, the mantra of "Just one more" a continuous hum in the back of his mind. All his concentration was on taking the next step and nothing else.

    He was nearly across the courtyard when he finally slipped up. His foot landed at an awkward angle, and he collapsed to the ground. His breathing was rough and uneven as he lay on the ground, eyes closed, heart pounding like a hummingbird. He knew he had to get up, but the ground was just so comfortable. He could just lay there and forget all his troubles.

    He could, but he wouldn''t. Nick knew he needed to get up, as it was only a matter of time before they caught up to him. He sincerely doubted the bomb was enough to finish them off, so he had to keep moving.

    Opening his eyes, his breathing once again steady, he found himself in front of a store. Not just any store, a pet food store. For some reason, that sounded familiar, but Nick couldn''t quite place the reason.

    He didn''t even remember coming near the store. He was so concentrated on taking another step, that he was barely paying attention to where he was going. He should probably work on that.

    Nick crawled toward the store, which was thankfully only a few feet in front of him, and used the porch to haul himself up. He managed to stand for a moment, before falling right back down on his ass.

    Well at least he wasn''t face down booty up anymore, so that was a plus. No need to give those clowns any ideas, he saw Buggy''s bedroom. But that was still a problem. He needed to move, he just couldn''t. He was spent, completely and utterly.

    Looking out at the courtyard, he couldn''t help but admire the simple beauty of it. The cobblestone street, the colorful, rustic architecture, the long faced dog staring at him.

    What, when did that get there? Was he really so unaware of his surroundings that he failed to notice a dog he collapsed near? Turns out, yes, yes he was.

    The dog kept staring at him, not blinking. If Nick was honest with himself, it was kinda creepy. "Uh, hey boy. You don''t mind if I rest here for a moment, do you?"

    The dog stared at him for a few more seconds, before turning around and gazing out at the courtyard, seemingly deciding that Nick wasn''t a threat. Guess that means he had his approval, at least for now.

    But Nick could swear that dog looked familiar. It was on the tip of his fog covered mind. Any second now, and it would come to him. Yes, any moment, he would gain that flash of inspiration that jogged his shitty memory.

    ¡­Any second now.

    ¡­Or not.

    Nick groaned as he lay against a support beam, his eyes closing in exhaustion, "Maybe just a quick nap." He knew he shouldn''t, knew he needed to get away, but he was just too tired. The whole day had been too much for him, and he was done with a capital D.

    Besides, what was the worst that could happen? That was his challenge to Murphy as he zonked out. A challenge that would be happily accepted.

    ***Line Break***

    Nami was a cautious woman by heart, something she had to be to survive her line of work. Stealing from pirates and influential assholes came with more than a little risk, so her stealth game was on point. She was like a kunoichi, beautiful and deadly in equal measures.

    Her newest companion however, was more akin to a bull hopped up on drugs, rampaging through a china shop. He had no sense of self preservation whatsoever. Everytime they rounded a corner, Nami would check to see if the coast was clear, while the rubber idiot just waltzed out into the open.

    Was he trying to get them killed? Did eating a Devil Fruit destroy all common sense, or was he just naturally a reckless fool? Regardless, he was driving her insane, and not just from his lack of self preservation, it was also from-

    "Are we there yet?"

    His incessant whining. Was he really a pirate? From her own experience, pirates didn''t tend to complain this much. Well, at least not until she stole their treasure that is. Then they complained a lot.

    "Almost. Just have some patience, would you?" she whispered/hissed at him. This was going to be a long day, she could just feel it. Actually, it''s already been a long day, he was just making it longer.

    "Fine¡­" Luffy moaned out. He didn''t see why he couldn''t just charge in there and kick this Buggy guy''s ass already. Didn''t she want to save her friend? Doesn''t she know that the longer they take the more likely it is that he would die? Whatever, girls were weird.

    Nami sighed as Luffy seemed to shut his mouth for the time being. Good, now if everything went according to plan, they would be able to ambush the Buggy Pirates. He would keep them distracted, while she snuck in and rescued her friend. That was the plan anyway, and as long as they don''t get caught, they should be able to-

    "Hey Luffy," a deep voice interrupted her chain of thought. Are you kidding? The moment Luffy shut his trap was the moment they got caught? Should she have just let him start screaming then? Would that have kept them hidden?

    The both of them looked behind them to see a pair of individuals. An imposing man in a white shirt, dark green pants that were almost black, and a forest green haramaki belt holding three black swords. His hair was also a light shade of green and he had three earrings in his left ear.

    The man next to him was the complete opposite. He was older, with curly white hair and a yellow flannel button up shirt. His shorts were black and barely came to his knees. On his feet were a pair of sandals, and he wore a pair of round glasses on his face. But his most distinctive feature was his armor. It was made of cured leather, but shaped in a way that made it look like he was wearing whiskey barrels for protection. He was also holding a spear in one hand.

    Nami herself started to panic, sweat coming down her forehead as she stared at the newcomers. The older gentleman had a similar expression on his face. Neither of them knew what to do in this situation, and so resorted to staring.

    Luffy however, had no such qualms, "Zoro! You made it," he exclaimed with a cheer. Nami gave her companion a look. Did these two know each other? It certainly seemed like it by Luffy''s happy expression, quite the opposite to what the man named Zoro looked like. He looked like someone put salt in his coffee.

    Wait a minute¡­ Zoro? Nami could have sworn she heard that name before, but where?

    "No thanks to you. What the hell were you thinking?" Zoro asked gruffly, his eyes squinted in annoyance. It was a similar look Nami had when dealing with the rubber man.

    "I was thinking about breakfast. My bad," Luffy explained with a laugh.

    "Dumbass," Zoro sighed, hand rubbing his face in irritation. He then turned his gaze toward Nami, who stiffened at the sudden attention. His eyes narrowed with suspicion, "And who are you?"

    Nami gulped a bit, slightly intimidated by the green haired man. She opened her mouth to speak, more than likely to tell him off, but a certain straw hat wearing individual beat her to it.

    "This is Nami, she''s our new navigator."

    "Oh yeah?" Zoro responded, eyes gaining a speculative look.

    "Temporary navigator," Nami corrected, which went completely ignored by the other two as they started to bicker about which one of them was worse with directions. Was this her life now, surrounded by idiots on all sides? Did she do something wrong? Was she being punished for a past life?

    Watching them for a bit, her memory suddenly sparked to life, "Wait a minute? Are you Roronoa Zoro, the Pirate Hunter? Why would you join a pirate crew?"

    The two of them stopped their bickering, turning to face her. The man in question gave a huff of annoyance, "It''s a long story. And I never called myself that. I needed food, so I started collecting bounties, simple as that."

    "I see," she responded. It wasn''t like it was a terrible reason to become a bounty hunter, though most of the ones she met were in it believing they could get rich quick. Or they just thought they were hot shit. Those ones tended to die pretty quickly, so Nami could appreciate his simple reasoning.

    She then turned to the other person, the one who had been ignored until now, "And who are you?"

    Said man stood a little straighter, "My name is Boodle, and I''m the mayor of this town."

    "That explains the pompous posturing," thought Nami. "So, how did you two meet?" she asked, not letting her thoughts show. No need to make another enemy, she had enough of them in this town as it is.

    "Oh, well, I was with the rest of the town, hiding in the forest, when this young man stumbled into our encampment. I thought for sure it was one of those scoundrels with Buggy, and that we were done for. Thankfully, that wasn''t the case, and it was only a lost and confused stranger."

    "Hey wait a minute," started Zoro, only to be cut off by Nami.

    "I see. And then you brought him into town?"

    "That''s right, young lady. I was just about to charge in and face Buggy myself, so it wasn''t any real trouble."

    Zoro''s eye twitched as they continued to converse, completely ignoring him. So far, he wasn''t sure about their new navigator, but he wasn''t the Captain. All he could do was keep an eye on her and make sure she wasn''t up to anything. Something about her just rubbed him the wrong way, his gut telling him she would be trouble, and a man always listens to his gut.

    Something that might explain his sense of direction.

    Their conversation was interrupted by a loud crash, coming from the center of town. They could see in the distance, a dust cloud riding in the air. Something had to have happened.

    "W-what was that?" Nami stammered. Everyone''s gazes were fixed on the direction of the noise, with Zoro and Luffy having a hardened look in their eyes. Well, Zoro did anyway. Luffy''s was more blank but it was more serious than before.

    "Those damn pirates. I won''t stand for them destroying my town any longer. You hear that Buggy! I''m coming for you!" Boodle yelled as he charged toward the noise. The others could only stare flabbergasted as he raced ahead.

    "We have to stop him! They''ll kill him for sure," Nami stated, giving the other two a firm look. Luffy and Zoro gave each other a look, before shrugging their shoulders.

    "Why not? I could use a good fight anyway."

    "Shishishi, let''s go!"

    The three of them darted off after the mayor, intent on saving him. Or at the very least beating someone up, which would in turn, save the mayor.

    They caught up to him fairly quickly. He was old and it wasn''t that far. Boodle was standing at the entrance of the courtyard, and across from them to the left, was a cloud of dust and debris coming from a building with a large hole in it.

    But that wasn''t what caught their attention. No, that was reserved for the big ass lion right dab in the center of the courtyard.

    "Is that a lion!? What''s a lion doing in the middle of town?" Nami screamed. Luffy and Zoro only stared at the scene, while Boodle glared in anger, "That''s one of Buggy''s circus animals, under the control of Beast Tamer Mohji."

    That made sense, at least to Nami. Afterall, she did run into a bear while on his boat. A bear that was on fire the last time she saw it. A bear that was rightly angry at Nick for setting it ablaze.

    They didn''t have time for this, they needed to find her friend, and quickly. If one of their top members was here, even if she couldn''t see him, that means there was less back at their headquarters. It was the perfect time to strike.

    But before Nami could voice her opinion, Zoro cut her off, "What''s that under its paw?"

    Nami''s voice died in her throat as she, along with Luffy and Boodle, squinted their eyes to see what Zoro was talking about. Underneath the lion''s paw was a struggling figure, biting and clawing at the beast above it.

    "It looks like a little dog," said Luffy.

    "Chouchou!" screamed Boodle.

    "Chouchou?" thought everyone else.

    "You know that dog old guy?" asked Luffy in his usual carefree and disrespectful manner. The mayor was gritting his teeth and shaking in rage. It was obvious he knew the animal and cared for it a great deal.

    "That''s Chouchou. He belonged to a friend of mine before he died. Now he sits there and guards the pet store. It''s his treasure."

    "I see," said Luffy, his hand going up to hold his hat. An action that meant little to Boodle or Nami, but Zoro had a good idea what his Captain was thinking about, having been told the story of how he obtained that hat. It also meant there was a good chance of him getting involved, which didn''t bother the swordsman at all. He needed the exercise.

    Suddenly, Chouchou managed to wiggle just enough to be able to bite the oversized lion. It roared in pain and anger, the little dog having a much stronger bite than one would expect, given its size.

    "Yeah, you go doggy!" yelled Luffy in excitement. Nami rolled her eyes. Boys sure do love their violence. Not like her. She was a delicate, gentle soul, that wouldn''t hurt a fly. Its death would be swift and painless after all.

    The lion growled in anger as it raised its paw into the air. Chouchou, refusing to let go, was raised with it. With a roar, the lion swung its paw, and despite the impressive jaw strength of the brave little dog, it was sent flying, smashing into a building.

    "Chouchou, no!" yelled Boodle. Nami covered her mouth in horror. It was hard to watch, the things pirates did to innocent people. Or in this case, innocent dogs. Just another reason to hate them.

    "Damn you! You''ll pay for that!" yelled Boodle, before he charged the lion, raising his spear as he did so.

    "Wait a minute!" shouted Nami. He couldn''t beat that thing. At least she didn''t think he could. If he went in there now, he was just going to throw his life away.

    "Huh, didn''t think the old man had it in him," commented Zoro.

    "Aren''t you going to stop him?" asked Nami, turning her gaze toward him.

    "Why should I? He''s made up his mind. I won''t stand between another man and his battle," Zoro stated firmly. Nami growled at him before she turned to the last remaining person who could help.

    "Luffy?"

    But said pirate was only staring at the scene, an actual serious expression on his face. Something she hasn''t seen before. But he also wasn''t moving, he was just watching.

    Nami clenched her fists. What did she expect? They were pirates after all. Why would they care if some random old man died?

    "Stay away from Chouchou!" yelled the mayor, pulling Nami out of her thoughts. She watched as he thrust his shoddy weapon at the lion, who merely jumped back and avoided the attack. It shouldn''t surprise her that the lion was so agile, given that the bear could do backflips, but it still did. Giant animals should not be capable of that!

    The lion growled at the mayor, before letting out a massive roar, one that stole whatever bravado the mayor was feeling, as he fell right onto his ass, shaking with fear.

    "What''s wrong Ritchie?" questioned a voice from inside the pet shop.

    The group turned to see who it was, noticing a silhouette hidden by the dust. Slowly it emerged to reveal a person, or at least something that looked like a person.

    Standing on the pet shop''s porch was a man wearing blue pants and a yellow sash. But that was where the normal attire ended. On his feet were shoes shaped like an animal''s paws, and his torso was covered in a fur vest. But only his chest, leaving his midriff bare. His hair was white, shaped like an animal''s ears, making it look like he has four ears, and he has a short white beard.

    "Who''s this clown?" questioned Zoro. Nami couldn''t have put it better herself. The weirdo definitely looked like he belonged with Buggy.

    The weirdo stepped out of the pet store, holding a whip in his hand, dragging something as he exited. With each step he took, the sound of whatever it was being dragged got louder, until they could make out a body. But not just any body, it was one that Nami immediately recognized.

    "Nick!"

 Chapter 8

    Nick opened his eyes with a start, his head moving frantically in every direction as he took in his surroundings. He was in a¡­ bathtub?

    What the hell?

    The last thing he remembered was collapsing near a long faced dog, bleeding more blood than he thought he had. Was that a dream? Or was this a dream? Or was this some kind of Inception bullshit?

    He really hoped it wasn''t the latter. That was all he needed, dropping to a new dream level and Freddy Krueger waiting to play doctor with those freaky ass hands of his. Nick shuddered at the thought.

    Well no use worrying about it. If this was a dream, he might as well enjoy it, and if it was real life, he might as well enjoy it even more. With that he sunk into the warm, bubbly water with a sigh of contentment.

    Is this what Nami got to enjoy last night? This nirvana? If so, she definitely owed him one. Wait, didn''t he get t-bagged by a bear¡­?

    Two! She owes him two!

    Ah, who wants to think of such traumatic things while enjoying a nice soak in the tub? A real weirdo, that''s who. And Nick was anything but a weirdo. Awkward and slightly pervy, but not weird.

    Speaking of pervy, Nick opened his eyes, gazing at the other side of the claw foot tub, his imagination easily picturing the busty beauty he traveled with. Her luscious orange hair, her sparkling brown eyes as she eyes treasure, (or anything of value really) and of course, her bouncy, bountiful, beguiling, boobies!

    Oh he could just see them now, all soapy and wet, glistening with a provocative shine. Nami giving him a coy smile as she teased him, eyes shining with dirty mischief. Her foot, slowly, sensually, creeping down the tub toward his sacred treasure.

    That thought brought Nick to full mast, violently demanding attention. The thought of Nami and her delicate foot was too much for one manhood to bear, and now he needed his help. Well, who was he to deny a friend in need?

    It wasn''t Nick that was into feet, it was just his penis. Scout''s honor!

    Just as he was about to provide his bestie with assistance, a knock came from the doorway, distracting him from his sacred duty. Who the hell was that? Why now? It was just getting good damn it!

    "Hello? Nick? Are you in there?" said a familiar voice. In fact, that voice belonged to the very woman he was just thinking about. You know what they say, speak of the devil and she shall appear.

    Was it that she could sense what he was about to do while thinking of her? Was that a power women had? If so, Nick was in some deep shit. There was no way he could think of Nami in a purely platonic way, her body was just way too damn perfect. It just wasn''t possible. He was only a man!

    "Nick?" asked the voice again. Well, no use trying to ignore her, might as well bite the blue ball bullet and get it over with.

    "Yeah I''m in here. Was there something you needed?" he asked, hoping she would just go away. But, from what little experience he had with her, he doubted those cards were on the table.

    "Oh good. How''s the water?"

    "It''s good. Nice and warm."

    "Glad to hear it. Mind if I ask you something?"

    Nick groaned at this, his little soldier almost off duty. Was it too much to ask that he got a little private time? A little me time to destress and unwind from the worries of the day.

    Guess so. Whatever¡­

    "Sure, go ahead," he responded despondently. If she could tell he was a bit upset, she didn''t say. No, what she did say shocked Nick to his core. The core of his man parts that is.

    "Would you mind if I joined you?"

    If he was playing a record right now, this is the part you would hear a loud skip. Did he hear her correctly? Did she really say she wanted to rub a dub dub in the tub with him?

    "Could¡­ could you repeat that?"

    "Do you have soap in your ears? I asked if I could join you. Or is there something you don''t want me to see?"

    Even in his dreams, Nami is a snarky little thing. He knew it was a dream now, cause there was no way in hell Nami would ask to take a bath with him. At least not yet, they barely knew each other. But did that matter to good ol'' Nicky boy?

    Nope!

    Dream pussy is still pussy. Something his soldier boy agreed with, as he was now standing at attention, ready and willing to do his duty. What a guy, and he just clocked out too.

    "Please, I have nothing to hide. Join me if you want to, I don''t mind," Nick said, hoping she didn''t hear the slight crack in his voice. Judging by the slight laugh she gave, he didn''t think he was that lucky.

    "Ok, I''m coming in," she practically purred. Nick gulped as he watched the door slowly open. She was doing this on purpose, he just knew it. Dream Nami was just as much of a tease as real Nami it seems, and Nick could blame no one but himself.

    After several agonizing moments, the door finally fully opened. Nick was practically ready to jump out of his seat at this point. He could see her outline through the fog and the steam.

    She entered the room, taking dainty steps forward, barely making a sound, her cat burglar skills on full display. As she got closer, more and more of her became visible. He could see her short hair and pouty lips, her brown eyes full of deviousness, and her long, smooth legs that just kept going and going until they reached the bottom of her towel.

    That''s when Nick''s heart skipped a beat. Nami was wearing nothing but a towel. A towel that barely covered anything, and that left nothing to the imagination. Her generous bosom was imprisoned, the towel their warden.

    Nick was more than willing to perform a jailbreak.

    "Like what you see?" asked Nami, with a coy smile. Damn, this vixen knew exactly what she was doing to him. Of course he liked the view, it was as if Aphrodite inhabited human form.

    He idly wondered if the real Nami would be like this as well. Probably. He just knew she would be a world class tease. He doubted he would complain though, if she looked even half this good in a towel in real life.

    "I¡­ truthfully Nami, I have a hard time believing a woman as beautiful as you exists. You are absolutely perfect," he told her. Was he laying it on a little thick for his literal dream girl? Yes, yes he was.

    But in his defense¡­

    Boobies!

    Nami giggled, a blush not entirely from the heat lighting up her face, "Ah, aren''t you sweet? Flattery will get you nowhere you know."

    Her grin said otherwise. She was so close now Nick could smell her perfume. It brought him back to earlier that day, when she hugged him in Buggy''s freaky fetish room. Flowers and citrus, carried by a summer breeze.

    "It''s not flattery if it''s true though, is it?" Nick questioned.

    Nami hummed in thought, "I guess not." She then raised her hands up to her mountainous peaks, teasing him as she lifted them up and let them flop back down, jiggling with their hypnotic sway once more.

    Nick stared at them with a focus that would make a laser jealous. How had they not popped out? What evil magic allowed that tiny, tiny towel to keep them hidden? Such foul sorcery should be purged from the world, it was a blight on humanity itself.

    More importantly, wasn''t this his dream? So how are her bosoms able to defy his wishes? This was his domain, where he was lord and master, and those bazongas would reveal themselves, or face the consequences.

    "Are you ruff Nick?" she asked, lowering the towel just a bit so that her nipples were barely covered.

    "Oh yeah, I''ll be as rough as you want-wait? What did you just say?" Nick asked, perplexed.

    "I asked, are you ruff ruff. Grrr."

    Nick stared at her in dawning horror. No, not now. Not yet! He was so close! Nirvana, inches away, only to be snatched from his grasp by the cruel twist of fate. Or a barking dog.

    That''s right! He fell asleep with that dog just a few feet from him. If he was making a big enough fuss to interrupt his wet dream that means¡­

    The enemy has caught up to him. One of Buggy''s goons must be close by and the dog took offense to that. Not that Nick could blame him, those guys suck. Stab happy clown fuckers!

    With a depressed yet resigned sigh, Nick gave one last look at the nearly naked form of Nami, trying his best to etch the image into his brain for future reference, even as the world around him began to shift and sway like the fevered dream of a hippie on acid. His time was up.

    Nami gave him one last sultry look, as she dropped her towel, the steam covering anything good. She was a tease to the bitter end.

    "I''ll be back!" Nick screamed one final time.

    Nick jolted awake with a start, woozily searching his surroundings. Everything was spinning. Most likely from the combination of blood loss and exhaustion. Seems his little nap did little to cure him of those inconveniences. It may have made it harder actually, kind of like his ding-a-ling. Erections probably weren''t a good combination with extreme blood loss. His blood pressure must be in the shitter right about now.

    There was the dog, growling at something. There was the pet store behind him, devoid of life. And in front of him, in the courtyard, was a big ass lion, and a furry riding him.

    Fan-freaking-tastic, it was Mohji, and¡­ uh, wait what was the lion''s name again? And did it always look so¡­ how to put it? Mangy? What happened to-oh! He happened. That''s right¡­ Big cannon go boom, now lion no has hair.

    He didn''t look happy about it either. His eyes were laser focused on Nick, damn near glowing with their intensity. Angry would be an understatement, a disservice to the very meaning of the word. Livid? Apoplectic?

    Something like that anyway.

    The furry looked pleased with himself. Smug for smugness''s sake. What a douche¡­ Nick was pretty sure he said he didn''t want to fight the furry, and this is why. They''re cocky little shits.

    "It seems I''ve found you, Mr. Thief. It was quite rude of you to leave the party early like that. It was for you after all, ahahahah!" said Mohji with a big stupid laugh. Not as stupid as Buggy''s, but still pretty annoying.

    "Ugh," Nick groaned, standing up on shaky legs. "God, your voice is annoying. Can you keep it down, I was trying to nap. And your party sucked anyway."

    Mohji seemed to take offense to that, growling like a wild animal. A wild puppy to be precise. "You damn punk. Do you have any idea who I am?"

    Nick quirked an eyebrow, seemingly in deep thought, "The lion''s beta male, baby bottom bitch?"

    Time seemed to stop for a moment as the insult sunk in. Once it did, Mohji''s eyes began to twitch. First the left one, then the right one. Then the veins started popping. Yep, he was mad. But the funny thing was¡­

    The lion seemed to agree with him.

    "No you miserable little shit! I''m Beast Tamer Mohji! I can make any beast my loyal servant! I''m the alpha! I''m the one on top!" he seethed.

    Nick stared at him for a moment, "Cool story bro."

    "Gah! Get him Ritchie!"

    "So that''s his name," were the last thoughts of Nick, before he was bitch slapped through a building. He tried to dodge, but it looked more like an old man tripping over his own balls.

    And just as painful.

    Agony once more erupted from his everything as he barreled through the wall and numerous stands of pet food. Glass shards embedded themselves into his flesh, and fresh blood oozed out.

    But on the plus side, his boner was gone.

    "Good job Ritchie," praised the furry. Ritchie roared in pride, preening at the compliment. Mohji then dismounted the lion, landed with a thump on the ground. He wore a savage grin as he made his way toward the pet store.

    "Grr, bark, bark, bark," yipped a little dog, standing in Mohji''s way. Said man stopped and stared at the puny thing, before squatting down and holding his hand out, "Come now, there''s no need for that. Rejoice, you serve me now."

    But the dog known as Chouchou had other ideas about that. With one last growl, he leapt up and chomped down hard on the pirate. Mohji howled in pain, swinging his arm left and right, up and down, desperately trying to remove the canine.

    "Ahh! Let go, let go!"

    But Chouchou refused. He would make the person who destroyed his treasure pay in the only way he knew how. He would deliver doggy justice to the perpetrator.

    Eventually, Mohji began to hit the dog, hoping that would remove him. It did not. If anything, Chouchou began to bite down even harder.

    Nick watched this from the comfort of his bed of broken things. He was pretty sure he had a splinter or two lodged in his ass. Maybe Nami could help with that later? Couldn''t hurt to ask.

    He watched with amusement as Mohji continued to flail about, having little to know success in removing the angry dog. Some beast tamer he turned out to be. It only confirmed to Nick that Mohji was indeed a beta male.

    "Get him, doggy."

    Mohji grew tired of the beast not being tamed by him and swung his hand at one of the poles holding up the porch, slamming Chouchou into it. The dog let out a pained whimper as its jaw loosened, giving Mohji just enough time to grab him by the scruff of his neck and rip him off, flinging him to the ground.

    "Damn mongrel. Ritchie, hold him down! I''ll deal with him later," ordered Mohji. The lion hurried to comply, placing his enormous paw over the struggling dog. With the dog secured, Mohji turned his attention to his original target, Nick, who was nowhere to be seen.

    "Where did he go!?" Mohji yelled as he entered the store through the hole. He looked around the shop, clearly spotting the blood Nick left behind. With a savage grin, he walked towards the spot, knowing he couldn''t have gotten far. He was in the store, hiding, and Mohji would flush him out.

    "Do you really think you can hide from me? I''ll have you know I''ve never lost a game of hide and seek before, so it''s only a matter of time before I find you."

    Nick rolled his eyes at Mohji''s attempt at being intimidating. Like he would ever be intimidated by a furry. All he needed was for Mohji to take the bait, and whammo! Victory for Nick.

    He had no plan for the lion though. His last plan to fight a large animal ended in a tea-bagging disaster, so he wasn''t keen on a repeat. He did wonder if the lion was as flame retardant as the bear.

    Best not to risk it.

    Mohji, unaware of Nick''s plans, followed the blood trail Nick left him, which led to a door near the front counter. Grinning once more, Mohji approached the door, as Nick snuck around the counter, with a length of broken timber in his hand.

    "I''ve got you now. I told you there''s no hiding from me," Mohji said with a smug grin, as he wrapped his hand around the door handle, before violently wrenching the door open, revealing nothing more than an office, devoid of life. His smug look vanished as he gazed at the empty room.

    "Where is he?" Mohji questioned angrily.

    "Hey, asshole!" yelled a voice behind him. Mohji turned around, only to see Nick, holding up what looked like a 2x4. Nick gave him a savage grin of his own, as he swung the piece of wood at Mohji, splintering it all over his face.

    You might be reading a stolen copy. Visit Royal Road for the authentic version.

    Mohji''s screech of pain was music to Nick''s ears. And was that a tooth? I think it was a tooth. Mohji the Beta Beast Bitch landed on the ground with a dull thud, groaning in pain.

    Well that wasn''t good. Nick was hoping that would knock him out, but it seems he was too weak at the moment to K.O a bitch. Oh well, if it kept him down long enough for Nick to get away, that would have to be good enough.

    Dropping the splintered, broken hunk of scrap wood, Nick slowly hobbled out of the demolished building, ignoring Mohji''s quiet cries of how he would kill him. Tall talk from a tall glass of candy ass.

    Speaking of sweet, sugary asses, Nick wondered once again to Nami. He needed to find her. If she was even still on the island that is. Thinking about it, she was probably long gone by now. Why would she stick around for a guy she barely knew?

    The short answer is, she wouldn''t. And he couldn''t blame her. He wouldn''t stick around for someone he just met, especially if he met that person in a jail cell. Unless that person looked like Nami that is. He definitely wouldn''t leave town without an ass that fine.

    Different priorities for different people. It was doubtful she was after his ass the same way he was after hers. Actually, his wallet was usually in his back pocket, so in a way, she was after his ass. Or at least something close to it.

    He would have to watch himself if they ever played a game of grab ass. Naw, if he played a game like that with her, she could have his wallet. Not like there was anything in it anyway, so he would definitely be getting the better end of that deal.

    What was he doing again, he was distracted by Nami related things. Shit, she didn''t even have to be near him to hypnotize him with her body. That just wasn''t fair.

    He also didn''t need another boner right now.

    But back to the matter at hand, he was escaping, wasn''t he? That sounded right. It wasn''t easy to think at the moment, what with all the blood loss and what might very well be a concussion. That lion might look stupid, and a bit like a burn victim, but he sure hit hard.

    He was just about out of the pet shop, barely able to make out Ritchie and the still struggling Chouchou, when something was wrapped around his neck.

    Well that can''t be good.

    That prediction proved true, when a moment later, he was violently yanked back into the shop. Damn, and he went through all that effort to escape, limping inch by inch out of that fucking building, only to be dragged back in.

    Nick was sent flying through another series of shelves, this one filled with canned goods. In Nick''s humble opinion, it hurt like a bitch. Not as much as the first time he was sent hurtling through pet food, since that time he was punted by a goddamn lion, but it still didn''t feel good.

    But the worst part was that it was Mohji that did it. That hurt his pride more than anything.

    Nick landed near Mohji, with a gasp of pain, choking and breathing with a ragged wheeze. He clutched at the thing strangling him like a python. Looking down, which was a struggle in and of itself, he discovered it was a whip. Mohji''s whip to be precise.

    Can''t that furry take a hint? He just wasn''t that into him. Or BDSM.

    Ah fuck, now he was thinking of Nami in a dominatrix outfit, stepping on him and threatening to punish him. Ok, so maybe he was into BDSM. But now wasn''t exactly the best time for that revelation.

    "And where do you think you''re going," questioned Mohji with a grin. A grin Nick noticed was missing a tooth. That made him feel a rush of pride.

    "Quick question? Does your pirate crew offer dental?" Nick gasped out with a smarmy grin. It sounded like a chain smoker trying to sing opera. Fuck his throat hurt.

    Mohji appeared confused for a second, before he used his tongue to examine his teeth. It didn''t take long for him to notice something missing. Eyes wide, he grabbed a broken piece of glass to examine his face. The second opinion was the same as the first, he was missing a tooth.

    How''s that for hide and seek, bitch?

    "Gah, you little bastard! If Captain Buggy didn''t want to kill you himself, you would be dead by now," Mohji raged.

    "Lucky me," snarked Nick. He just couldn''t help himself. Mohji was too easy to mock, it took no effort on his part whatsoever. Took some of the fun out of it, if he was honest. Not enough to stop, it was still enjoyable, but he wanted someone who was a bit more of a challenge.

    "You won''t think you''re so lucky after I''m through with you. Captain said I couldn''t kill you, he never said you had to be in one piece, and it just so happens to be Ritchie''s lunchtime¡­" Mohji said, leaving that threat hanging in the air. It didn''t need to be said after all, Nick knew what it meant.

    He was about to get a whole lot more pirate like, with a peg leg or a hook. Maybe even both.

    With that said, the furry pirate began pulling Nick out of the pet shop, enjoying every noise of pain his captive made as he was dragged across glass and wood and all manner of uncomfortable things. It was music to his ears.

    "Oh Ritchie, daddy brought you a snack!" Mohji practically sang out as he exited the pet shop, Nick struggling and gasping for air behind him, whip still firmly wrapped around his neck.

    What would Nami say if she could see him now? Probably something snarky as she rescued him and then billed him for the trouble. He could practically hear her now¡­

    "Nick!"

    Yeah like that, only a bit more greedy and a bit less concerned. Wait, that wasn''t just in his imagination was it, because that thing has been getting out of control lately. Forcing himself to search for her, he managed to spot what looked like her in the distance, near the entrance to an alleyway.

    Or at least he thought it was her. The boobs looked right from this distance, as they were about the only things he could properly make out. Well, that and her orange hair. But who was that with her? Did she replace him already? If she did, and he survived, she would get such a spanking! Make her perky ass redder than Buggy''s nose.

    Actually, they kind of looked familiar¡­ Yeah, the more he stared, the more their blurry shapes sharpened up. There was a shorter guy with a straw hat, and a gruff looking guy with green hair and three swords.

    Oh! Luffy and Zoro! So she found them after all, that''s good. Fate must really want her on his crew. What fate wanted for Nick was a little less clear, but at least with them here, his chances of survival increased significantly.

    He would take what he could get.

    "Hm, who are you?" Mohji questioned, staring at the quivering old man on the ground. The furry pirate looked around before sighting the spear on the ground. Two and two must have equaled four in his mind, as his stare turned into a glare.

    "Don''t tell me you were trying to hurt my Ritchie?" he asked. Mayor Boodle didn''t give an answer, at least not one that was coherent. It was more like the incest baby of stutter and mutter.

    Ritchie, the narc that he is, confirmed Mohji''s suspicions with a growl.

    "I knew it! Don''t think you''ll get away with it!" he snarled. He then spotted Chouchou, struggling to get to his feet. "I almost forgot about you. Haven''t learned your lesson yet I see? Don''t worry, everyone comes around eventually."

    Nick desperately wanted to make a sex joke about people cumming around, but alas, he was being choked out. If he managed to survive this, he would need a serious training montage so crap like this didn''t happen again.

    "Don''t you lay a hand on Chouchou you fiend!" yelled the mayor, who seemed to have found his balls somewhere. Mohji turned to look at the Boodle once more, and a vicious and cruel thought entered his brain.

    "You seem to care about this little mongrel I see. It warms my heart to see a fellow animal lover¡­ Unfortunately, both you and he have crossed me, so you must be punished, and I just thought of the perfect punishment. You see, it''s Ritchie''s lunchtime, and while I was planning on just feeding him one of this guy''s legs, I don''t think that will be enough, do you? No I didn''t think so either. So I decided¡­"

    "He could use an appetizer. That little mutt should do nicely."

    Mohji let out a boisterous laugh, while everyone in the courtyard stared in shock. Even Nick, who was glaring at him from his back on the ground. It didn''t look like he made any friends with that statement, no siree.

    "Don''t you dare!" yelled Boodle impotently. Mohji just laughed, highly amused by the empty threats of the old man. After all, what could he do?

    "Go on Ritchie, it''s snack time!"

    The lion grinned at his master''s words, sauntering up to the growling dog, and used his claws to pick him up by the scruff of his neck. It would have been rather impressive, if it wasn''t about to eat an innocent dog.

    "Luffy, you have to do something," pleaded Nami. Luffy seemed to agree with the sentiment, as stepped forward with a determined look in his eyes, "Right!"

    "Hang on," interrupted Zoro, gazing at the scene impassively. His eyes were trained on the struggling Chouchou, right hand gripping his three swords tightly. Luffy and Nami turned to look at the swordsman, one in curiosity, and the other in anger.

    "What, why!? If we wait any longer, that innocent little dog is going to get eaten," Nami argued, while Luffy just waited to hear the argument. If he didn''t agree with Zoro, he would go ahead and save him anyway, so why not hear his First Mate out?

    And boy did Luffy love thinking about how he had a First Mate now. His first real crew member. He was a real pirate Captain now! The thought sent joyful tingles all across his body.

    And not like the ones he got looking at Makino when he started puberty.

    "Just look, that dog isn''t ready to throw in the towel just yet. Give him a chance to defend his treasure. Worst comes to worst, I cut him out of the lion''s belly," Zoro explained his reasoning. Nami thought it sounded stupid, but Luffy¡­

    Luffy placed his hand on his hat, eyes gaining a faraway look, before he seemed to come to a decision, "Right, we''ll let him handle this for now."

    "What are we waiting for? Are we just going to watch them die?" Nami growled, deep in her throat. Didn''t these idiots get it, the dog has already lost, what was waiting going to do? And it wasn''t just the dog who was in danger. She could still see Nick, clearly struggling as hard as the dog to escape their captors.

    How much longer could he last? Looking him over, she could easily spot the numerous and bloody injuries. She could only imagine what happened to him to put him in that state, and it made the guilt gnaw at her even more.

    They had to do something, before it was too late.

    "Just shut up and watch," said Zoro. Nami turned to give him a piece of her mind, but her feminine fury was stalled by the look Zoro had on his face. And it wasn''t just him, Luffy wore a similar expression.

    Eyes locked on the scene in front of them, bodies ready to act in an instant. It was surprisingly intense, especially from Luffy, who tended to act like a goofball. Maybe they weren''t so nonchalant about this after all¡­

    Still, that doesn''t mean she has to like it.

    Looking back to the gruesome event about to happen, she saw that Ritchie the lion was holding Chouchou above his head, mouth wide open and tongue hanging to one side, a pool of drool forming beneath him.

    "Bon App¨¦tit! Ahahaha!" cheered Mohji. At his encouragement, Ritchie dropped Chouchou into his mouth.

    "No! Chouchou!" cried Boodle, as Mohji continued to laugh. Nami closed her eyes, not wanting to watch anymore. However, a strange noise drew her attention back to the scene in front of her.

    It was Ritchie who was making the noise. Something between a gag and a whine of pain. Kind of like if you ate spicy wings on the extra spicy side. The kind where you get your name on a plaque for finishing the plate.

    "What''s wrong Ritchie!?" yelled Mohji, as everyone continued to watch the lion. Tears formed in his eyes, before he opened his maw and stuck out his tongue. There, dangling on the tip, was none other than Chouchou, jaw firmly clamped around Ritchie''s pink appendage. There was a bit of blood dribbling down it as well.

    That little dog really had some bite to him.

    "No, Ritchie!" cried Mohji, as the rest of the crowd cheered the little dog on.

    "Yeah! Show him who''s boss doggy!"

    "Hmph, thought so. I knew that dog still had some fight in him."

    "I-I can''t believe it. That little guy is really something."

    "Chouchou! I''m so glad you''re safe!"

    Nick wanted to cheer with them as well, but he only managed to sound like a dying asthmatic. Oh well, it was the thought that counts.

    Ritchie was having a terrible time. His day started off pretty good. He got to eat some choice meats, bask in the sun, drink some rum, and throw a pointy object at a guy. It was all going so well¡­

    Until the cannon that is. Somehow, the guy they had tied up for the party game managed to escape. That alone would sour the mood. But not only did he escape, he used their own cannon against them, utterly ruining his soft and silky fur.

    How would he get his harem of lionesses now? His dream was ruined, and it was all his fault. He would never forgive him. That man would suffer.

    And it seemed like he was. It truly made Ritchie happy to see the man suffer, even if he wasn''t tormenting him personally. At least not yet, after all, he was told he could eat a leg. Justice was served.

    He even got to have a little snack! Yes, things were starting to look up for old Ritchie. Unfortunately for him, he didn''t take into account his snack fighting back. It was just plain rude in his opinion. But as soon as he dropped the tasty little morsel into his mouth, things once again took a turn for the worst.

    It bit him. The nerve! Food was meant to be enjoyed, and Ritchie was not enjoying this. Not one little bit! But there was nothing he could do. The darn thing just wouldn''t let go. Now he knows how his master felt earlier. It was funny back then, but now that it was happening to him¡­

    Not so much.

    Desperate and in pain, Ritchie began to thrash around. He ignored Mohji''s repeated cries to stop. How could he? This damn thing still hadn''t let go! He had to get it off before it bit his tongue off. How would he be able to clean himself if that happened? Take a bath?

    Hell no!

    So he continued. Ramming into things tongue first, wiping his face on the dirt, whipping his head every which way¡­ But no matter what he tried, nothing seemed to work. He just couldn''t dislodge him.

    Mohji growled as he was knocked to the ground as his beloved Ritchie flailed about. He needed to stop him before it was too late. But how? He couldn''t get close enough to grab the offending pooch that was chomping on him.

    Normally, he would be able to use his whip to remove him by lashing the little dog over and over again until it gave up. Or died, whichever came first. But that wasn''t an option at the moment, as his weapon was preoccupied at the moment, choking that thieving little bastard.

    Mohji gripped the whip in his hand tighter, frustration mounting. Or at least, he tried to. But all he grabbed was dirt. Looking down confirmed that his hand was indeed empty. He must have dropped it when Ritchie slammed into him.

    That wasn''t good.

    That was when Mohji picked up on a sound behind him. It was the sound of a chain smoker approaching, taking slow, heavy steps, and deep, desperate breaths. There was only one person who it could be.

    Before Mohji could process his thoughts, something wrapped around his neck. Something familiar. Something he used every day.

    His whip.

    "Hey there¡­ pal. You and I¡­ need to have a little¡­ chat."

    It was him! That bastard Nick. Mohji would have cursed him out, but he was struggling to breathe. The tables have been turned it seems, or rather, the table was flipped over.

    Nami and the others were surprised by the turn of events, each of them believing Nick was out of the fight. It seems they were wrong.

    "Huh, guy''s tougher than he looks," mentioned Zoro, watching the scene with a raised eyebrow.

    "Right? He''ll make a great crewmate," Luffy mentioned with a laugh.

    Zoro raised an eyebrow at this, "The hell are you talking about? He''s joining the crew too?" He was a bit shocked that recruiting was going so well. Their first island as a pirate crew and they already had two new members? His Captain must have the luck of the devil on his side.

    "Shishishi, he''s Nami''s friend," Luffy said, as if that explained anything. It did, but not really. But rather than make a big fuss about it, Zoro just shrugged his shoulders and accepted the situation.

    Nami was watching what was happening, almost mesmerized. How was Nick standing with those injuries? She figured he was tough, but this was ridiculous. It was also kind of hot¡­

    Her face lit up as that thought entered her mind. Where did that come from? Sure he was easy on the eyes, but she''s met plenty of those types before, so why was he any different? What made him so special?

    She didn''t have an answer to those questions, and it wasn''t the time to find them. So for now, she would ignore the heat in her face and the flutter in her chest. She was also ignoring Luffy saying they were part of his crew. It was temporary, just a deal, nothing more.

    Back with Nick, he was almost gleeful as he choked the life out of Mohji. Even if every part of his broken body disagreed with the action, Nick didn''t care. He would have his revenge.

    His eyes drifted over to the lion, who was still freaking out. He needed to be stopped before he could do any serious damage to Chouchou. It was only a matter of time until he was flung off, killed, and eaten.

    Something Nick didn''t want to happen. Looking at his captive, an idea came to his mind. A brilliant and stupid idea. He would kill two birds with one stone, or rather, he would use one mother fucker to smack another mother fucker.

    "You know¡­ you and your crew¡­ really showed me a good time. So it''s only right¡­ I return the favor!"

    Mohji''s eyes widened. Afterall, their idea of a good time was killing, raping, and pillaging. Not necessarily in that order. So being shown the same courtesy his crew showed him¡­

    Did not bode well.

    Nick wasn''t sure he could pull off what he wanted to do, especially in his current state, but he was still going to try. He was really banking on the power of anime, for that was his only hope.

    With his mind settled, he put his plan of attack into action. He gripped the whip firmly in his hands and pulled with all his might. Which was less impressive than Nick was willing to admit. You know, pride and all that. But in this case, it was just enough.

    Mohji was launched off his feet from the force, and Nick began spinning him round and around. Faster and faster he spun, creating a whirlwind around them.

    Now that he had enough momentum, all Nick had to do was wait for the lion to get in range, and then, bam! He would wallop him in the head with his furry master.

    He needed to be patient, but his strength was waning. How many second winds could one guy have? He could only offer praise to the gods of anime. Long may they reign.

    After nearly a minute, Nick''s arms were burning. Like someone poured lava into his veins or trying a six-hour cross fit session after being a flabby fuck for years. It was painful, excruciating, and oh so satisfying.

    Not so much for Mohji, who was sick to his stomach

    "S-stop it! I''m going to¡­ going to¡­ blargh."

    Ritchie''s frenzied form finally halted as a repulsive and odorous slime slapped him in the face.

    Now! This was his chance!

    He would need to use up a considerable amount of luck to pull this off. Hopefully he would have enough for the real threats that would come later. It would suck to use it all up against Buggy and his crew, but beggars can''t be choosers.

    And he was begging.

    "This is it Mohji! Time to put you down!"

    "No, wait!"

    With a final yell, Nick swung Mohji into a high arc in the air, keeping the momentum from the spinning, and slammed him headfirst into the lion''s skull, making him bite his tongue. Both of their eyes popped out, and time seemed to slow down.

    Seeing this, Chouchou finally relented, and released Ritchie from his grasp. This seemed to be some kind of signal, as they slowly crumbled to the ground, unconscious.

    Seeing this, Nick gave a roar of victory, followed by a howl from Chouchou. They did it, they won. They beat the furry.

    The people watching were in various states of disbelief and awe. Luffy had sparkles in his eyes, "So cool!" he cheered.

    Nick turned to face Nami and the others, only to lose his strength as he turned, collapsing to the ground, like a puppet whose strings had been cut. It was rather undignified.

    "Nick!" Nami yelled as she ran up to her fallen friend, concern written on her face. She fell to her knees as she reached him, turning him onto his back.

    "Nick! Are you alright? Nick!" she yelled desperately, shaking him. Now that she was closer, she could see the injuries for what they were. It was bad, real bad. She wasn''t sure how he was still alive. There was so much blood¡­

    Nick groaned as he forced his eyes open, his vision blurry, only to see an angel hovering over him. She was so beautiful it was hard to put into words. It sucked that he was dead, but at least he went out on a win. So there''s that.

    He was sad he wouldn''t get to go on an adventure with everyone, but them''s the brakes. He at least got to see Nami in real life, so he could count that as another win. And now he gets to go to heaven with an angel that was just as beautiful as her.

    With big, perky boobs¡­

    Luscious orange hair¡­

    A perfect hourglass figure¡­

    Wait a minute¡­ This angel was looking awfully familiar. His vision started to clear and the angel turned into someone he recognized. It was Nami, and she looked like she was close to tears.

    "Nami?" he croaked out. Said girl gave a smile, wiping tears from her eyes. Was she crying over him? But why?

    "Glad to see you''re not dead," she mentioned with a smile. One which he returned as best he could.

    "Not yet, but the jury''s still deliberating on it," he snarked back. Even that amount of speaking hurt his abused throat.

    "Idiot, what were you thinking? Taking them on by yourself," Nami said, her relieved smile turning into a glare. How dare he make her worry. She should up his debt for that.

    "Sorry. Didn''t want them to hurt you," he said, making her glare lessen. How could she stay mad at him for that? WIth a sigh, her smile returned. Guess she wouldn''t charge him for the worry after all.

    Not this time anyway.

    "Just don''t do it again, you got that. Keep making me worry like this, and I''ll start charging you."

    Nick paled even further, which considering he looked like a corpse already, was saying something. "Anything but that."

    His pleas fell on deaf ears, as the two continued to lightly bicker. With the battle over, Luffy, Zoro, and Boodle approached.

    "Can''t say I saw that coming. This guy is tougher than he looks," mentioned Zoro. He wasn''t the strongest guy, clearly, but to do what he did, in the condition he was in¡­ Yeah, he would make a good crewmate. At the very least, he could take a punch.

    "Hahaha, I know right? I thought he was a goner for sure," said Luffy. He was happy though, that he was proven incorrect. The guy seemed pretty strong, so having him on the crew would be awesome.

    Boodle himself, was shocked someone standing on death''s door, was able to beat one of Buggy''s top crew members. It was inconceivable to him. Just what were they feeding kids these days?

    "Nick!"

    Their thoughts were interrupted by Nami''s shout. Quickening their pace, they saw that said man''s eyes were closed, but he was still breathing. He was alive, at least for now.

    "Calm down young lady, your friend has only passed out. Can''t say I blame him, considering those injuries. Let''s get him inside to rest," said Boodle, resting his hand on her shoulder. Nami only nodded in agreement.

    A bark caught their attention. Chouchou was standing by Mohji, a suspicious puddle beneath his head, and the dog looked rather proud of himself. He barked again, and pointed his head toward the pet shop.

    "It seems Chouchou is offering his home so he can rest," explained Boodle.

    "Makes sense. They were comrades in arms after all," said Zoro, as he picked up Nick and flung him over his shoulder.

    "Hey, be careful with him!" yelled Nami.

    "Yeah, yeah."

    Luffy laughed happily as they followed Chouchou, Nami and Zoro arguing as they walked. His crew was looking like it was going to be a whole lot of fun, and he couldn''t wait for the next adventure.

 Chapter 9

    Nami sat in an uncomfortable wooden chair, turning every which way in an attempt to get comfortable. But no matter how she sat, she couldn''t get the right angle. She gave up with a huff.

    Looking over at the bed, her frustration left as she gazed at Nick, breaths coming out in shallow gasps. They did what they could, none of them being doctors, but he had lost a lot of blood. Too much.

    It was a miracle he was breathing at all. By all rights, he shouldn''t be. But he was tough, apparently. Tougher than she gave him credit for at least. It would have impressed her, if he wasn''t knocking on death''s door.

    She sighed and turned away, her gaze going to the other occupants in the room. Pirates, one''s she aligned herself with in order to save the idiot taking a nap. Actually, it was two idiots taking a nap. Zoro conked out the minute the bandages were wrapped around Nick''s corpse-like body.

    Boodle, the mayor, went back to the villagers camp to find the town doctor. It was their only hope of saving him. As long as the mayor didn''t get captured and made it back in time.

    Chouchou, the brave little dog, went outside to keep watch, and guard his treasure. Boodle told them the whole story as they patched Nick up the best they could. She really felt for the little guy, and Luffy made fast friends with him.

    After the dog chewed on his face for a bit for breaking more of his home. Accidentally, of course.

    But the rest of them needed to do something in the meantime. They could do nothing for Nick now, it was out of their hands. Buggy wouldn''t likely let them off scott free. He would come for them, or he''d just blow up the whole town. They needed to strike first, take the fight to them.

    "Man, I''m hungry," complained Luffy.

    Nami''s eyes twitched, "How are you still hungry? You ate an entire house''s worth of food." It wasn''t fair, he could eat whatever he wants, and still be skinny. She watched her figure like a hawk.

    Luffy shrugged, "I dunno. Never thought about it before."

    This was getting her nowhere. Was she the only sane one in the room? Looking at her present company, she could conclude that yes, yes she was.

    "Listen, we need a plan to take out Buggy and the rest of his crew. It won''t be long before they come for us and-WILL YOU WAKE UP ALREADY!" she screamed at Zoro, who woke up with a lazy, "Huh?"

    Luffy laughed as Zoro complained about not getting enough beauty sleep. Makino used to say the same thing, but she was really pretty. Actually, Dadan said it too, and she was¡­ well she actually might have needed her beauty sleep. Now he felt bad.

    "As I was saying, we need to come up with a plan to-" Her rant was interrupted by a green haired swordsman.

    "We don''t need a plan. Let''s just go and kick their asses," he said, yawning. The whole conversation was boring, and he really needed a nap. Rowing that little boat after Luffy took it out of him. And then he went for a hike in the woods on the opposite side of the island.

    "Do you know how big their crew is?" she asked hotly.

    "Do you?" he responded back.

    Luffy watched them argue back and forth, his head following along, back and forth, making him dizzy.

    "It''s quality over quantity. I guarantee we''re stronger than them," Zoro grunted. This was getting them nowhere, fast. Damn this stubborn woman, and damn his Captain for bringing her along.

    "That all depends on the quantity, doesn''t it? Even if they''re weakling, 100 vs 1 isn''t good odds you know. Even I wouldn''t take that bet," she snarked back.

    "Then you''re a shitty gambler."

    "What!?"

    "Let''s let the Captain decide," said Zoro, cutting off Nami''s tirade before it could begin. Her expression soured at the thought of her following a pirate''s orders, even a decent one.

    "He''s not my-"

    "Even if it''s only temporary, he''s still your Captain, tight?"

    Nami''s mouth shut tight at that. He was right, technically. And she hated that. His smug look doing nothing to aid in her mood. He won this round, but next time, she wouldn''t be so easily swayed by logic.

    "Ugh, fine. Luffy, what do you think we should do?" she asked, turning to the rubber man, only to see him sitting there with his eyes spinning, before he toppled over, dizzy.

    This was her Captain? Really? Zoro had the same disbelieving expression on his face, as he cursed out said Captain, "Damnit Luffy."

    ***Line Break***

    Nami wasn''t happy. Not at all. Here she was, marching toward Buggy and his goons seemingly without a care in the world. But that wasn''t true, she cared a lot! It was the morons next to her that had the death wish.

    Once Luffy recovered from his dizzy spell, she asked him, quite politely in her opinion, on what they should do. His response?

    "Let''s go kick their asses!"

    Yep, not even an ounce of hesitation. It might have been impressive if that decision didn''t involve her. It almost brought her to tears. Zoro, the jerk, was acting all smug about it too.

    Ugh, boys. If Nick was awake, he would agree with her. Probably. He was a boy after all, so he might have the stupid. Oh who was she kidding, of course he had the stupid! If he didn''t, he wouldn''t be on his death bed right now.

    And wasn''t that a sobering thought.

    "Will you calm down already," said a deep voice to her right. She turned to face him, the so-called Pirate Hunter, and leveled him with a glare.

    "Excuse me?"

    Zoro gave her his own glare. He was tired of her attitude already. "If you''re that scared then leave. You''ll only slow us down."

    She shook her head in frustration. They just didn''t get it. It wasn''t that she was scared, even though she was, it was that she would prefer to make a plan first. One that wasn''t just rushing head first into danger.

    "So what if I''m scared? That''s not the point. There has to be a better way than charging in the front door," she said, exasperated.

    "They have a front door?" questioned Luffy, causing both of them to sigh.

    "It''s a figure of speech Luffy," she said, believing that would explain everything. And to be fair, normally, you''d be right. But it was Luffy.

    "So it''s a mystery door¡­"

    Nami felt like pulling her hair out. Her beautiful, beautiful hair. But she would refrain. She wouldn''t look good bald, or with bald patches. She could pull off a lot of looks, but that wasn''t one of them.

    "Look, I get it. But that friend of yours already took out one of their commanders, right? So there''s no point in sneaking around. It''s a waste of time."

    Nami hated that she agreed with him. Even if it nearly killed him, Nick did take out Mohji. She wasn''t sure how many more they had, but that placed the odds more in their favor.

    Still not a bet she would normally take.

    "I guess you''re right. But just to be safe, I''ll let you guys take the lead," she conceded.

    Zoro rolled his eyes, "Whatever."

    Luffy seemed oblivious to the tension. Or perhaps he was just ignoring it. They were crewmates now, so things would work out in the end. They''d be friends before you know it.

    The town was silent, save for the occasional gust of wind that whistled as it passed. It didn''t bother the trio any as they made their way to the center of town. But what they saw when they got there would leave them speechless.

    "W-what the hell happened here?" questioned Nami with a quiver in her voice. Ok, maybe not completely speechless, but you couldn''t blame them. The whole area was completely wrecked.

    Nami remembered the blast from earlier, the one that let her escape from that pervy asshole. Is this from that blast? It had to be. But what caused it? Could it have been Nick? Is that how he escaped from Buggy?

    Zoro whistled as he admired the destruction. It wasn''t just one building that was blown apart, it was several behind it as well. Whole blocks reduced to little more than rubble. And in that rubble, he could make out bodies. Arms and legs sticking out at random places, each one wearing circus clothes.

    At least it wasn''t the townsfolk. Unless Buggy forced them to dress up that is.

    Luffy''s eyes were blank as he gazed at the area. It reminded him of the Goa Kingdom. More specifically, the Gray Terminal. It was nothing but a trash heap, with people searching through the garbage, hoping to find something with a little value to sell.

    The rubber man liked this town. The little dog and the funny mayor guy. He liked them, so he didn''t appreciate someone wrecking their home. He would make them pay.

    A falling piece of debris drew their attention, with Nami hiding behind Zoro. Say what you will about his personality, the guy was built.

    On top of the rubble stood a man with long green hair, a checkered scarf, and a sleeveless trench coat. It was none other than Cabaji, who gifted the three with a cocky smirk, "So I see that Mohji failed. Pity. He''ll need to be punished."

    His eyes went to each of them one by one, lingering on Nami and Zoro. For different reasons of course. Nami was Nami, and Zoro was someone Cabaji happened to be eager to meet.

    He completely dismissed the goofy looking one in a straw hat.

    "Well, if it isn''t Roronoa Zoro," he said.

    "And who the hell are you?" responded the green haired swordsman. The one with three swords that is.

    "My name is Cabaji. I happen to be a bit of a swordsman myself, and I''ve heard an awful lot about you. Are you here to claim my Captain''s bounty?"

    Zoro tsk''d as he stared at the man, "Nope, I''m just here to kick his ass."

    Cabaji laughed, like he heard a funny joke, irritating Zoro, "And what''s so funny huh?"

    Once Cabaji calmed down, he gave them another condescending look, "The fact that you think you can beat him. Haven''t you heard? He''s immortal."

    Zoro rolled his eyes, "Yeah right. Like I believe that."

    "Oh, but it''s true. He ate a Devil Fruit, you see. One that makes him invincible."

    Nami looked worried at the boast, while Zoro just looked bored. He didn''t believe for a second the guy was unbeatable. Nami didn''t believe it either, but the rumors she''s heard¡­ She doubted he was truly invincible, but those rumors came from somewhere. There was likely some grain of truth to them, however small it might be.

    The straw hat wearing future King of the Pirate''s didn''t share his crewmates unenthused looks. His eyes were practically shining with glee, "You mean he can''t be beat? So cool!"

    All three of them were taken aback by his enthusiasm. Who got excited about their opponent being unbeatable? A real battle maniac, that''s who. But the more he thought about it, the more excited Zoro himself got.

    Because he''s a battle maniac as well.

    After all, it would be a pretty big deal to beat the unbeatable, right? That would bring him one step closer to achieving his dream. To become the world''s greatest swordsman.

    And to retake something that was stolen.

    "Uh, that''s right. You stand no chance, so you might as well surrender and accept your punishment," Cabaji yelled, as he got over the weird kid''s joy at facing an invincible foe.

    "What do you say, Captain? Want to surrender to this guy?" asked Zoro, with more than a little sarcasm.

    That snapped Luffy out of his wonder, and he remembered his rage, "Hell no! Let''s kick his ass!"

    Zoro smirked as he drew one of his blades, "Well you heard him. You can take your offer and shove it up your ass."

    That didn''t deter Cabaji one bit, who almost seemed happy about their refusal, "So be it. In that case, I challenge you, Roronoa Zoro, to a duel!"

    "Heh, now that''s more like it. I accept," he responded, holding out his sword in challenge. He''s only been a pirate for a couple days and already he gets to duel. Seems the pirate life suited him just fine.

    Luffy grinned as he jumped back to give them some room. His First Mate was challenged to a duel, and he couldn''t wait to see him kick this guy''s ass, "You got this Zoro!"

    This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road. If you spot it on Amazon, please report it.

    Nami was less enthused about the whole affair, but stepped back all the same. Actually, this could work in their favor. She had no doubt that Zoro was strong, so he should be able to beat this guy no problem.

    He looked like an idiot after all. And this would take out another of their heavy hitters. The large crew they had wouldn''t matter if they fought one on one. But wait, where was the rest of his crew? They should be here, shouldn''t they? Or were they all buried under the rubble?

    Her thoughts were interrupted by Cabaji shouting and leaping into the air, and pulling out a¡­ unicycle? Seriously? She knew they took the whole clown thing seriously, having seen Buggy''s room, but come on.

    She shuddered just thinking about it. That room would haunt her years to come.

    Cabaji landed on the unicycle as he reached the ground, and immediately started pedaling, kicking up a cloud of dust as he sped toward his opponent. Drawing his sword, a cutlass, and raising it high he shouted, "Die!" as he reached Zoro, swinging it down with all his might.

    The momentum gave his swing some extra oomph, but it didn''t perturb Zoro in the slightest. He raised his single sword and blocked the strike, not moving an inch. He gave his opponent a feral grin as he mocked, "That all you got?"

    Cabaji growled, "Not even close!" He took in a deep breath, confusing Zoro, before breathing out a string of fire.

    "Acrobat Technique: Chili Con Carnival!"

    "Gah," Zoro grunted, the heat burning his face and blinding him. He dove out of the way, as Cabaji took another swing at him. Not letting his miss discourage him, Cabaji let loose a series of cuts.

    Zoro managed to dodge or block all of them, blinking away the glare brought on by the fire. Zoro growled and took a swing of his own, only for the circus pirate to backpedal on his unicycle, avoiding the strike.

    "You''re a sneaky little bastard, aren''t you?" said Zoro. It was a dirty trick. The three sword user was hoping for a proper duel. Guess that''s what he gets for thinking a pirate would have some honor.

    "Hahaha, why thank you. Now for my next trick¡­" Cabaji said, with a grin, before stabbing his sword into the ground. Zoro looked confused again as Cabaji began to spin, creating a dust cloud that obscured him from sight.

    "Acrobat Technique: Surprise at the Bathhouse!"

    The dust cloud began moving, advancing toward Zoro, who held up his sword defensively. Nami covered her eyes as dust blew into her face, while Luffy just held onto his hat, eyes never leaving the duel.

    In fact, he hasn''t blinked since it began. He didn''t want to risk missing a single moment.

    Zoro watched as a knife shot out from the cloud. He tilted his head to dodge, and then blocked the sword strike that followed. It was another sneaky trick. Cabajii kept swinging his blade, coming from all different directions, interspersed with razor sharp throwing knives.

    Zoro gave ground, blocking or dodging each attack. He struggled a bit at first, not being able to tell where and when the other guy would strike, but soon enough, he noticed a flaw.

    Before a sword strike, the twister would slow down, just a fraction, and before a knife throw, it would wobble slightly. That''s how he figured out the when. The where wasn''t hard either. The cloud of dust would become displaced wherever a sword or a knife was coming from. It "bubbled" outward, for lack of a better word.

    Now that he knew the pattern, it was almost too easy. He dodged and blocked for another minute, before growing tired of it. Seeing a point bubble out, and the speed drop, Zoro knew that''s where his sword would come out of.

    So he swung at that point, forcing Cabaji to turn his attack into a block. The dust cloud settled down, revealing Cabaji with an angry expression. He was breathing a bit heavy, sweat and dirt lining his brow, struggling to halt Zoro''s blade.

    Who looked like he wasn''t even trying. Even with only one sword, using only one arm, he was easily overpowering Cabaji. The clown pirate snarled as he tried to push the other swordsman away, but it was no use. Zoro was just too strong.

    With a bored expression, Zoro used his free hand to hide a yawn, "Is that it? I thought you''d be tougher with all that blustering you did earlier. Any more tricks up your sleeve, cause I''m getting bored."

    "You bastard!" Cabaji yelled back. Zoro only smirked as he gripped his sword with both hands and sent Cabaji flying. He hit the ground with a grunt, his unicycle landing next to him. He raised his head, only to see Zoro pointing his blade at him.

    "Well, I''m waiting."

    "Fine then, let''s see how you handle this!" Cabaji growled, before jumping back on his unicycle and speeding up the side of a building, balancing on the edge, and staring down at his opponent with a cocky grin once more.

    "Cool," said Luffy, admiring Cagaji''s skill. Sure, Zoro was better, way better, and he wouldn''t trade his first crewmate for anything, not even all the meat in the world, but that doesn''t mean he couldn''t like the other guy''s technique. He went straight up a wall! On a unicycle! That was just awesome.

    So far, Luffy was enjoying his time at the circus.

    Nami was simply surprised by just how strong Zoro was. Sure, she figured him for a pretty tough guy, with his reputation and all, but it was another thing to see it firsthand

    "Acrobat Technique: Firework Festival!"

    Cabaji reached into his coat and flung a dozen deadly spinning tops. The tips were filed to a harsh point, barbed, and coated in a suspicious purple liquid. They came at Zoro fast, and spread out, making it nearly impossible to dodge.

    So he didn''t. With an almost lazy swipe of his sword, he cut the tops to pieces. Several landed on the ground next to him and kept spinning. He raised an eyebrow at his opponent, "That''s your best technique? And here I thought you''d give me a challenge."

    Rather than be upset, Cabaji merely continued to give him a cocky grin, "Come now Roronoa Zoro, use your head will you. Why do you think I named that technique Firework Festival, hm?"

    Zoro looked confused for a second, before his eyes widened in realization. Gaze returning to the tops, which were slowing down, he dashed away. As the tops stopped completely, they exploded in a violent torrent of color. It was as deadly as it was beautiful.

    Zoro was flung to the side, rolling across the ground. He grunted as he came to a stop, and turned to look at his opponent, only to see a dozen more tops spinning around him. "Damnit!" he cursed.

    He wouldn''t be able to get away in time, they were already slowing down. So he did the only thing he could think of. He crossed his arms in front of him and took the blast head on.

    "Zoro!" yelled Luffy in concern, as his friend disappeared into the bright and admittedly colorful explosion. Nami''s eyes widened as well, worry etched onto her face. Things were going so well too. She should have known better than to underestimate someone so sneaky.

    Even the strongest person could be taken out with a clever trick.

    They watched as Cabaji flung more and more tops into the dust, dozens upon dozens of them. Just where did he keep them all? Their ears were ringing by the time he was finished, having finally run out of tops.

    The green haired clown pirate threw his head back and laughed, "That was it? That was the great Pirate Hunter, Roronoa Zoro? How pathetic!"

    Luffy grew angry at the man insulting his crew, "You shut your mouth!"

    Cabaji only graced him with a condescending smirk. He was good at those. "Don''t worry, Mr. Straw Hat, you''ll be joining him soon."

    "Joining him where?" asked a voice. The group turned to face the sound. The cloud of debris that formed from the explosion slowly dissipated into the wind. Standing there, with smoldering burn marks in his shirt, was Zoro.

    The group was elated by this. Well, two of them were anyway. Cabaji was in disbelief. No one should be able to survive the Firework Festival. No one except his Captain, that is.

    "Zoro you''re alive!" Luffy cheered happily.

    "Course I am," he responded, breathing heavier than he''d like to admit. Those explosions did a number on him, and there was an annoying ringing in his ear that wouldn''t go away. But he wouldn''t be caught by the same trick twice. That sneaky bastard would get what''s coming to him.

    He winced, as he looked at his shoulder. Sticking out of it was one of those tops. It didn''t explode, thankfully, but he wasn''t keen about the liquid it was coated with. Probably some kind of poison.

    It wasn''t the only one either. There was one sticking out his left arm and thigh as well. Just great, one more thing to deal with. Or three in this case. He grunted quietly as he ripped them off of him, the barbs making it more irritating and painful than it should be.

    His attention was drawn back to Cabaji, who laughed out loud once more, "You may have survived the blast, but it''s only a matter of time now. Soon you''ll be too weak to stand."

    Zoro glared at the man, while Luffy and Nami looked worried again. They could see the purple liquid coating the tips of the tops. It was a good thing Boodle went to get the doctor, as it seemed like they would be getting a second patient.

    "Heh, you really think something like this will slow me down? You''re even dumber than you look," Zoro snarked, enraging Cabaji.

    "I grow weary of your disrespect, Roronoa Zoro. I think it''s time to show you your place!"

    Cabaji once more began pedaling his unicycle. Somehow he managed to stay in on spot as he did so, rapidly building up speed. The wheel began to smoke, and that seemed to be the signal.

    "Acrobat Technique: Boar Coming Down the Mountain!"

    Cabaji shot off like a bullet, heading straight down the side of the building, gaining even more momentum. He actually looked like a charging boar, snarling face and all.

    He reached the bottom and quickly made his way towards his opponent. Zoro prepared himself, and for the first time in this fight, drew his second sword. He crossed them in front of himself in a guard position.

    Cabaji slammed into him like a freight train. Zoro managed to block the overhand strike, but he couldn''t stop the momentum. Cabaji pushed him back into a building, slamming him with enough force to crack the brick.

    Zoro glared at the man and growled as he began to push him back. But Cabaji expected this, knowing that Zor was stronger than him, and inhaled deeply. Zoro''s eyes widened, recognizing the technique.

    "Acrobat Technique: Chili Con Carnival!"

    Rolling out of the way, Zoro was still singed slightly by the flames. He was getting real sick of these tricks. Turning to face his enemy, Zoro was surprised to see him nowhere in sight.

    "Zoro, above you!"

    "Huh?"

    Looking up at the sound of his Captain''s voice, he saw Cabaji pedaling up the wall once more. Only this time, he didn''t stop. He kept going, until he left the building all together, flying high in the sky.

    "Acrobat Technique: Summer Rain!"

    Cabaji held his sword facing downward now, as he fell to the earth, heading straight for Zoro. It was fast, and the sun blinded him, but he still managed to get out of the way. Breathing heavily, Zoro watched his opponent wearily, ready for another trick.

    "You don''t look so good. Do you need a break?" mocked Cabaji.

    "Go to hell!" Zoro responded.

    "That''s the spirit!" cheers Cabaji, as the unicycle tire once more began spinning in place. He was preparing another charge. Zoro readied himself again, adopting a guard position.

    "Ready or not, here I come!" With a gleeful shout, Cabaji raced toward his rival, faster than ever.

    He was about ? of the way there when several things happened at once. First, the poison kicked in, making Zoro wobble a bit and see double. Second, Cabaji used his cutlass to fling dirt in Zoro''s eyes.

    Ok, so maybe it was only two things, but that was enough. Zoro cursed as he flinched, eyes stinging from the dirt in his eyes. It was an involuntary action, but his guard was dropped. And with the poison affecting him, he couldn''t get his guard back up in gave Cabaji the opening he needed.

    "Die!"

    Cabaji thrust his sword forward, slicing into Zoro''s side as he sped past him. With a yell of pain, Zoro clutched his now bleeding side, collapsing onto one knee.

    "Zoro!" Luffy yelled out once more in worry. He seemed to be doing that a lot in this fight. It wasn''t right of his First Mate to make him worry like that.

    Nami covered her mouth in her hands. This wasn''t good. That wound looked bad. Blood was practically gushing onto the ground. If he wasn''t careful, Zoro would end up in a bed right next to Nick. That, or a coffin.

    "Hahaha, how was that Zoro? Ready to give up yet?" mocked Cabaji, rocking back and forth on his unicycle. Zoro didn''t answer right away, focusing on getting to his feet.

    Taking deep breaths, Zoro flashed Cabaji a glare. Both of them. Damnit, he was still seeing double. That''s not good.

    "Nothing to say? Well that''s fine by me. You can die in quiet dignity!" yelled Cabaji as he charged Zoro once more. Eyes wide, he rolled out of the way, dodging the other man''s sword by a hair.

    But Cabaji didn''t let up. He kept going, gaining more and more momentum with each pass. It was getting harder for Zoro to dodge, especially with the poison flowing through his veins.

    Eventually, he was too slow, and Cabaji cut into him again. This time, it was the shoulder. Zoro flopped onto the ground in pain. He was lying on his back, gasping for breath, eyes shut tight.

    "You''re so pathetic Zoro."

    His eyes opened in shock. Kuina? He looked around for the source of the voice, only to see his Captain and the orange haired woman staring at him in concern. Of course, how stupid of him, Kuina was dead. Murdered.

    His mind wandered to the past. All the duels he had with her, and not a single victory. Two thousand losses in a row. Must be some kind of record. He wondered what she would do in this situation. How would she beat this guy?

    He was nothing but a coward, using dirty tricks to win. When Zoro fought a fellow swordsman, one that challenged him to a duel no less, he expected there to be some decorum.

    "Never fight someone on their terms. Make them fight on yours. Keep them off balance."

    That''s it. He''d been fighting a battle on someone else''s terms. It was time to change that. If he wouldn''t fight him fair and square, he''d just have to make him.

    God he''s pathetic. Laying in the dirt, whining and crying about how unfair it was. He was a pirate now, and pirates fought dirty. He knew that. He won''t make excuses for his weakness again. He either wins, or he loses, simple as that.

    "Thanks Kuina," he muttered as he stood up once more.

    "No problem, Bonehead. Now get out there and win!"

    "You want to die on your feet. Well that''s fine by me!" Cabaji yelled as he sped toward his opponent. Zoro didn''t move, didn''t acknowledge him at all. He just stood there with his back turned, swords gripped loosely in his hands.

    Cabaji thrust his sword again, confident he would impale his opponent this time. After all, he wasn''t even looking at him. Victory would be his, and so would the bragging rights of killing the Pirate Hunter.

    Unfortunately for Cabaji, Zoro had no intention of being impaled. At the last second, he dodged, blade coming close enough to give him a shave. He spun around, lowering himself to one knee, gripped his sword tightly, and thrust it into the spokes of Cabaji''s unicycle.

    The result was Cabaji going flying. He landed with a painful thump, skidding along the ground, his sword clattering to the ground next to him. He laid there for a few moments, gasping for breath. The fall knocked the wind out of him. He slowly forced himself to look at Zoro, who was standing tall, staring at him impassively, holding his unicycle at the end of his sword.

    "Don''t think this means you''ve won," Cabaji growled, standing up on shaky legs. He took about as much damage from that fall as Zoro did the whole fight. Or maybe, Cabaji just wasn''t built nearly as tough.

    Zoro lifted up his sword, the one with the unicycle, and stared at it for a moment. His eyes narrowed as he flung it into the air. Cabaji and the rest watched with wide eyes.

    "W-what are you doing? Stop that!" Cabaji screeched.

    His pleas fell on deaf ears as Zoro swung his blades, chopping it into three pieces. Cabaji could only watch in despair as his unicycle was rendered useless. Along with his Acrobatic Techniques.

    "Damn you! You''ll pay for that!" he screamed, charging at Zoro, who wasn''t even looking at him. For the second time, Cabaji was basically ignored by his opponent.

    Zoro removed the bandana from his arm, and began tying it onto his head, "It doesn''t matter if there''s two of you, or three, or even a hundred-" he started, as he finished tying the bandana on his head, fastening it with a final, firm tug. And finally looking at his enemy.

    "-I won''t lose to trash like you."

    The intensity in his eyes made Cabaji pause in his charge. And no matter what he did, he couldn''t move. He was completely paralyzed.

    It was that moment when Zoro finally drew his third and final blade, placing it into his mouth. "Let''s end this."

    He got into a stance, arms crossed and blade pointing straight up. He crouched, as he prepared to attack.

    "Three Sword Style¡­"

    "No, wait!"

    "Oni¡­"

    "I said wait damn it!"

    "Giri!"

    With a mighty stomp that left a dent in the ground, Zoro took off, moving far quicker than Cabaji ever did. The other man tried to put up a guard, but it would prove to be useless. Zoro appeared behind his foe, swords extended.

    For a moment nothing happened, and the two spectators thought he might have missed. But then, blood. It erupted like a geyser from Cabaji''s chest, three cuts marring his flesh.

    "How could the Buggy Pirates lose to such riffraff?" Cabaji managed to say, standing upright for a few seconds once the spraying ceased. But then he collapsed, like a puppet whose strings were cut, lying in a pool of his own blood.

    "You never stood a chance," Zoro claimed, removing his bandana and sheathing his blades. Even though he said that, the fight was tougher than he thought it would be. That''s what he gets for underestimating his opponent.

    "Way to go, Bonehead."

    Zoro smirked at that, before he collapsed to the ground. The loss of blood and the poison finally taking its toll. If one were to stumble on the scene, it would be difficult to tell who was the victor.

    "Zoro!" Luffy cheered, this time not in worry, but joy. He ran up to his First Mate, a big happy smile on his face. Zoro just won his first fight as a member of his crew. How awesome is that?

    Nami approached more sedately. She hated to admit it, but she was impressed. That battle was a real roller coaster. First Zoro had the upper hand, then Cabaji, then Zoro again. Talk about emotional whiplash.

    That being said, "You look like shit," she commented as she neared. Zoro did his best to glare at her, but it lacked some potency when he couldn''t lift his arms.

    "Shut Up. I don''t need to hear that from the peanut gallery," he grumbled.

    "I''m just saying, maybe next time you fight a guy, don''t get stabbed."

    "Gee, thanks for your insight. I''ll keep that in mind."

    "My pleasure."

    Luffy laughed as he listened to his crew banter. It wasn''t as heated as it was before, so that was good. He was glad to see them getting along. It reminded him of his brothers. They were always ribbing each other.

    "Hey Luffy," said Zoro, snapping him out of his memories. "Hm, yeah, what''s up?"

    "Sorry, but, looks like you''ll have to handle the rest," he said, his voice slurring a bit. Luffy stared at him for a moment, before his face lit up in a big grin, "Got it. Leave it to me."

    He held out his fist for Zoro to bump, who raised his hand slowly with a grin of his own. But before they could complete their male bonding, their world exploded into white.

 Chapter 10

    Buggy stood on his ship, watching through his spyglass as his Chief of Staff was rendered a useless lump. He was enjoying the show for a while. Especially when he set off those fireworks.

    Now that was flashy!

    But he was defeated, just like Mohji. He swiveled his head to look at the beast tamer, scowling as he lay there, unconscious next to that scaredy cat lion of his and covered in dog piss. How could he have been beaten by that half dead half wit from earlier? It was pathetic.

    And it wasn''t just them, most of his crew was wiped out. The worthless lot getting themselves killed when that little shit turned their own cannon against them. The ones that weren''t dead were laying down somewhere in the ship, trying not to join their comrades.

    Useless lumps!

    The only ones left who were able bodied were those numbskulls he sent to raid a settlement, and even then there was only two of them left. And they even had the nerve to return empty handed, complaining about a booby trap. If he didn''t do something, he would be the laughing stock of the pirate world.

    Did he have to do everything himself? What was the point of having a crew if they couldn''t do their job? Gah, whatever. He would just have to get his hands dirty.

    Looking through the spyglass as they celebrated their victory over his men, Buggy thought this would be the perfect time to send them a message. He would make sure it was a crystal clear one tool. It would be terrible if there was some kind of misunderstanding after all.

    But there was something familiar about that straw hat guy. Something on the tip of his tongue. He was certain he''d never met him before, and yet¡­

    It didn''t matter. He made himself into Buggy''s enemy, so he would meet a flashy death. His expression turned absolutely murderous as he gave his remaining men their orders. Hopefully they wouldn''t screw this one up too.

    "Fire the Buggy Ball!"

    (It should be noted that Buggy did not in fact get his own hands dirty, and made his remaining crew do it instead.)

    ***Line Break***

    Nami moaned in pain as she came to her senses. Her hand went to her throbbing head, wincing as she found a knot. She looked around through bleary eyes, the ringing in her ears deafening her to all else.

    What happened? The last thing she remembered was Zoro beating that acrobat guy. And then¡­ nothing. Her memory was blank. But something must have happened. Why else would she be in pain?

    "-mi!"

    What was that? Was someone shouting?

    "-ami!"

    There it is again. Who the hell is Ami?

    "Nami!"

    Everything seemed to snap into focus. The blurry image in front of her cleared, and she could see the utter devastation around her. Not only that, but Luffy was staring at her with worry, his clothes torn, and blood leaked from small scratches that littered his body.

    His hat was fine though.

    "Luffy?" she asked, still in a bit of a daze. He seemed relieved when she finally answered him. He was worried she was hurt in the explosion. Besides the lump on her head that is.

    "You''re ok! I''m so glad. Stay here, I''m going to go find Zoro."

    "Wait! Luffy!" she called, but it was no use. Luffy set himself on a mission, and he was nearly deaf to everything else. She tried to stand up, but her body protested, and her head swam at the attempt.

    She looked around again as the dizziness finally went away. Everything was destroyed. It was like a tornado went through the area. And it wasn''t just here either. Half the town was gone. Just like that.

    Luffy was digging in a pile of rubble, looking for his crew. She didn''t have the heart to tell him he was most likely dead. His face was so earnest, so desperate as he searched for his missing friend. He may have been a pirate, but even Nami felt sorry for him.

    What kind of weapon could do this? Was it Buggy? It had to be. Who else would be so petty and cruel?

    "Arlong," she thought, but he wasn''t here. Or at least, she desperately hoped not. That was the last thing she needed.

    Thankfully, the destruction didn''t go back the way they came, so at least Nick should be safe. Maybe. There really was no guarantee. All she could do now was hope.

    "There you are!" a voice shouted, but it wasn''t Luffy, who was still digging through the rubble looking for Zoro. Turning to see who it was, she was happy to see the mayor, Boodle. And with him was an old woman, huffing and puffing as she tried to keep pace with him.

    "Slow down you old fool! My bones can''t take all this running," she complained loudly. Nami almost giggled at the sheepish expression Boodle wore as he was chastised. But now wasn''t the time for that

    "I''m sorry Michi, but that young man is on death''s door. There''s no time to wait!" he explained, as the old woman, Michi, grumbled something about halfwits.

    "Yes, yes, now step aside. Let me see to the girl," she grouched, pushing Boodle out of the way. She placed a bag on the ground, one that looked far too heavy for an old woman like Michi to carry.

    "Listen, I''m fine but-"

    "I''ll be the judge of that. Kids these days, always thinking they know best. Why, back in my day-" rambled Michi, as she began to perform some tests on Nami, checking for signs of a concussion.

    "I think I''ll just go help that young man over there," Boodle said, looking apologetic as he abandoned her with the old doctor. Damn him.

    "Eyes front girl!" snapped Michi, grabbing Nami''s face and turning it. Nami sighed, she hated going to the doctor''s.

    "Now I''m going to ask you a few questions. First, are you pregnant?"

    "Do I look pregnant to you!?" Nami snarled.

    "Well, you do seem a bit puffy in the face dear."

    "That''s because I was just caught in an explosion!"

    "There''s no need to shout!"

    After a few minutes, she was cleared with only a mild concussion. Her head was bandaged, and she was given a few painkillers.

    "Now I want you to take it easy for the next few days, do you understand? That''s quite the nasty bump you got."

    Nami nodded in agreement. Though she doubted she would be able to keep her word. They still had to deal with Buggy after all.

    The old woman sighed as she looked around her, a few tears falling from her eyes.

    "It was just about forty years ago now we started this little village. It was a whole lot of nothin'' back then. Just a bunch of rocks and empty fields. But slowly over time, it turned into this wonderful town. It was a lot of work, and there was plenty of doubt along the way. But we didn''t give up. And now just look at it. What kind of¡­"

    She paused in her speech as she tried to hold back a sob. She wasn''t successful, but Nami pretended she was.

    "Sorry about that dear. Got some dust in my eyes," she said, wiping her eyes.

    Nami knew her pain all too well. Every time she returns home, there''s someone else who isn''t there. There''s another home in ruins. She was afraid that everytime she left, she would have nothing to return to. That all her suffering would be for nothing.

    Pirates destroy everything.

    "Zoro! Where are you! Come on, stop hiding already!"

    Well maybe not all pirates. Luffy seems ok, but he was the exception, not the rule. It was clear he cared for his friend and crewmate, considering how torn up his hands are from searching for him.

    The orange haired navigator stood up. It was a small struggle, but the pain had mostly vanished by this point, the painkillers doing their job. She took a step forward, intending to support the rubber man as well as she could, but stopped and turned to Michi.

    "You know, the buildings may be gone, but as long as the people are alive, you can always rebuild. Things can be replaced, our loved ones aren''t so easy."

    She gave the old woman a radiant smile, which seemed to perk her up. She wiped away the rest of her tears, and stood up with a fire in her eyes.

    "You''re absolutely right. Now''s not the time to get all weepy. Thank you, young lady."

    "My name''s Nami."

    "Thank you Nami. You know, I have a grandson about your age."

    Nami groaned as the duo approached Luffy and the mayor, listening as the elderly doctor tried to set her up with her grandson, who was just the sweetest and cutest boy ever.

    She didn''t have time for romance, at least not at the moment. She had things she needed to do. People who were counting on her. She couldn''t allow herself to be distracted by someone. But she didn''t have the heart to tell Michi she wasn''t interested, not with how cheerful and excited she was. She didn''t want to see her depressed again.

    But maybe someday she''d find someone. Someone tall and brave, with brown hair and crystal clear blue eyes, big arms and a big-

    Her mind conjured up images of Nick in that moment, when they were in the tunnels below Shells Town. When he stripped naked to change clothes, and swaying between his legs was-

    "No! Stop thinking about it. Now''s not the time. Focus Nami!" She chastised herself, even as her face turned red. And she could swear she could hear the sound of an elephant trumpeting in the background.

    "Zoro!"

    Nami was broken from her perverse thoughts as she heard Luffy shout, and rubble tumbled down the pile, Boodle hopping around, trying to get out of the way..

    "Oh sweet merciful distraction." she thought.

    To her immense shock, they managed to find Zoro. And he was still alive! How? Just what was he made of? Was he even human, because she was having serious doubts at this point.

    Said swordsman coughed violently as they dragged him out. "Gah! What the hell happened?"

    "I can''t believe you''re alive young man. You''re made of sterner stuff than I am," commented Boodle, just as mesmerized as Nami by that fact.

    Luffy was crying rivers of joy after finding him, "Wah, Zoro! You''re alive!"

    "Ow Luffy, quit it, that hurts!" he complained, as his Captain latched onto him, squeezing him for all he''s worth. "Stop crying will you. Wait, is that snot? Gross, Luffy get off me!"

    Nami and the others laughed as they watched on, Luffy trying to hug Zoro, and Zoro holding Luffy at bay.

    It was all fun and games until Zoro collapsed from blood loss.

    ***Line Break***

    "Is he going to be ok old lady?" asked Luffy, poking the swordsman in the face.

    "He''ll be just fine-WOULD YOU STOP THAT ALREADY!" she screamed at the rubber man, making him jump back in fright. Michi huffed as she got her breathing and blood pressure back under control.

    "He''s not in immediate danger, but I can''t treat him here."

    They decided it would be best to move him, get him out of the battlefield and somewhere a tad more sanitary. As Boodle lifted the barely conscious man to his feet, throwing Zoro''s arm over his shoulder to help support him, the swordsman gasped out, "Luffy¡­"

    The rubber man turned to him, a curious expression on his face.

    "You better not lose, you hear me."

    Luffy''s face lit up in a grin, "Of course. There''s no way I''d lose."

    They smirked at each other before finally completing their male bonding, and fist bumping. That seemed to be the signal, as Luffy threw his hands in the air, screaming, "Alright! I''m coming for you Buggy!"

    He then sped off, kicking up a dust cloud as he did. "Hey, wait!" Nami yelled as she chased after him. Zoro watched them leave, before clutching his head as his vision swam once again, "Damn it."

    "That''s enough. Come along, let''s see to those wounds of yours," said Michi. Zoro could do nothing but comply, as the trio slowly hobbled down the street.

    Nami finally managed to catch up to her (temporary) Captain, bent over, hands on knees, gasping for breath. The only reason she was able to was that he reached his destination. The harbor.

    "Hey Nami," Luffy said, voice surprisingly calm. He wasn''t out of breath in the slightest.

    "Yeah?" she responded, as she finally got her breathing under control.

    "Is that Buggy''s ship?" he asked. Nami turned to see where he was indicating, and indeed, there it was, the very ship she and Nick robbed earlier. Except it was no longer moored to the docks, and was floating a ways away from the shoreline.

    "That''s it alright."

    Luffy''s eyes narrowed, having his enemy confirmed. It was time to put an end to the circus, once and for all.

    Unknown to both of them, Buggy was watching them through his spyglass.

    "They''re still alive? What a bunch of cockroaches," the clown pirate grumbled. He blew away half the town and they had the nerve to survive. That wasn''t very flashy of them. Oh well, one more should do it.

    "Is the Buggy Ball loaded yet?" he hollered to his crew.

    "Yes sir! It''s our last one!"

    "Good, then prepare to fire!"

    "Aye aye, Captain!"

    Buggy gave an evil smirk as he heard them aim the cannon. Soon, all his worries would be blown away. He gave a hearty laugh as the fuse was lit.

    The sound of cannon fire drew the attention of the two on the shore. Nami and Luffy watched as a cannonball, bright red with Buggy''s Skull and Bones on it, hurled toward them at blistering speeds.

    Nami panicked, figuring she was about to die, but Luffy was the opposite. With a determined look, he stepped in the path of the oncoming cannonball.

    "What are you doing!? We have to run!" yelled Nami, flabbergasted by his choice. Who in their right mind stood in the direct trajectory of a bomb? It was crazy.

    "Just stay back Nami," he responded.

    "What are you-"

    "Just trust me."

    Her eyes widened in disbelief. The look in his eyes was so confident, so reassuring, that she found she had no choice but to trust him. Maybe that made her crazy too. Trusting a pirate was a sure sign of insanity.

    "Fine! But you better know what you''re doing!"

    Lufffy gave her a wide smile, made even wider by the fact that he could stretch his face, "Don''t worry, I got this."

    With that said he turned to face the threat once more, which was over halfway there by this point. Luffy then began doing something strange. He was getting fat.

    Was that it? That was the thing that was going to save them? Obesity? But wait¡­ it wasn''t fat, it was air! He was inhaling oxygen at an alarming rate and bloating himself up like a-

    "Gum Gum: Balloon!"

    Like a that!

    Nami watched on in morbid fascination as the cannonball finally reached its destination. It struck Luffy with the force of a thunderclap, the air in his body cushioning the blow, yet still she could see his back stretching with the cannonball for several feet.

    But there was no explosion. No fiery inferno of death. It seems like it worked. Nami could hardly believe what she was seeing. Devil Fruits sure are weird.

    After holding it for a few seconds, Luffy flung the cannonball back at Buggy like he was a human slingshot. It soared high and fast, and struck the water near the ship. The force of the explosion nearly caused it to capsize.

    Grinning at his success, Luffy proceeded to grab onto a couple of the wooden posts on the dock, the ones usually used to tie ships to, and began stepping backwards, his arms becoming taught from the force. "Alright! Nami, grab on!"

    Her expression was once more flabbergasted, "Huh? Grab onto what?"

    "Shishishi, me of course. Let''s go pay Buggy a visit."

    Against her better judgment, she did just that. She held onto him like he was about to give her a piggyback ride. "Alright! Here we go, I''m coming for you Buggy!"

    "Luffy, what are you?"

    "Gum Gum: Rocket!"

    Nami held on for dear life, screaming as loud as he lungs would allow. Which was pretty darn loud. As they neared the ship, Luffy stretched his arms out again, grabbed hold of the railing, and launched them onto the ship. It was an experience Nami didn''t want to repeat.

    Buggy groaned as he made to stand. The force of his own cannonball having knocked him to the ground. That''s the second time one of his Buggy Balls had been used against him, and he was getting pretty sick of it.

    "Status report!" he demanded, taking stock of the damage they received. He could see his remaining men sprawled out on the floor, useless layabouts.

    "Don''t worry Captain, we''re all good here!"

    "I don''t give a damn about you! How''s my ship!?" he yelled.

    "Still floating sir!"

    "I can see that much you moron!"

    He sighed in irritation. Honestly, good help was so hard to find these days. Perhaps he should raise the standards of his hiring requirements. Yes, that seems like a good idea. Starting with proper hygiene. And the ability to spell one''s own name.

    "Captain Buggy!"

    "What is it now!?"

    "Look!"

    Buggy turned to where his subordinate was pointing, and saw something approaching. Rather quickly at that.

    Was it a bird?

    No...

    Some kind of weapon?

    No...

    Just what in the hell is that?

    His question would be answered in a fantastically violent manner. Whatever it was slammed into his ship, causing the whole thing to shake and sway once more. It wasn''t as bad as earlier, his Buggy Balls packed a far bigger punch, but it was still enough to knock his men on their asses.

    Buggy covered his eyes at the impact. When the swaying finally stopped, he furiously uncovered them, "What is it now!?"

    Standing on his ship was a man and a woman. The man looked like a goofball and the woman looked like she could give Boa Hancock a run for her money for the title of most beautiful woman.

    They also just so happened to be the people he just tried to make explode. Just how in the hell did they get on his ship? He was at least a quarter mile out to sea. Whatever, it didn''t matter.

    "Damn it Luffy, warn me next time!" Nami yelled, clobbering him on the head. That was easily one of the most terrifying experiences of her life.

    "Ow! Nami that hurt. Why''d you hit me?"

    "Because you deserved it!"

    "Excuse me? I hate to break up this endearing little comedy routine you got going on, but would you mind telling me WHAT THE HELL YOU THINK YOU''RE DOING ON MY SHIP!"

    The two of them turned to face Buggy, halting their spat. The clown was fuming at this point.

    "Are you Buggy?" asked Luffy, staring down the clown.

    "That''s right, I''m CAPTAIN Buggy."

    "Great, I''m here to kick your ass!" Luffy shouted, punching his palm.

    Buggy stared at him for a moment before bursting into laughter. Who did this little upstart think he is? Kick his ass? He was Buggy! He was immortal! Nobody kicked his ass!

    Buggy eventually calmed down, wiping a tear from his eye, "That''s a good one kid. You ever think of doing stand up?"

    Luffy just stared back, "Nope, I''m going to be King of the Pirates."

    Crickets could be heard at his declaration. After a few tense moments, Buggy burst into laughter once more, his crew following suit. "You? King of the Pirates? Don''t make me laugh!"

    Luffy didn''t seem bothered by it, which surprised Nami. She thought he''d be furious at the mockery, but he just let it roll right off his back. It was shockingly mature for someone like Luffy.

    "Laugh all you want. It doesn''t matter what you, or anyone else has to say. I will be King of the Pirates someday."

    Buggy stopped laughing, looking at Luffy with a critical eye. There was no doubt in his gaze, not a single drop of hesitation in his form. His eyes were hard as steel as he made his declaration.

    For the second time that day, for the briefest of moments, he could see the specter of his old Captain behind someone. He was getting tired of it.

    "Well, you have some balls at least. Fine, I''ll show you the difference between a dream and reality. I hope you''re ready for a harsh lesson, kid."

    Luffy got into a fighting stance, "Bring it on, Big Nose."

    That was the last straw. The camel''s back was officially broken. Buggy''s eyes went bloodshot, looking like he smoked a bit too much of that good stuff. He grabbed a knife, and pulled his arm back.

    The genuine version of this novel can be found on another site. Support the author by reading it there.

    "Take this! Chop Chop: Cannon!"

    Buggy sent his fist flying at Luffy. And only his fist. Buggy''s hand detached from the rest of his body, shocking both Nami and Luffy. While surprised, Luffy managed to grab his hand before he could be impaled, sliding back a few feet.

    "Luffy!" Nami yelled in concern. She released a relieved sigh when Luffy caught the floating hand. Was this what they meant when they said Buggy was immortal? It had to be.

    "Nice try Buggy!" Luffy snarked at him, but Buggy grinned back.

    "Who said I was done? Chop Chop: Bombardment!"

    Buggy thrust his arm forward, and more and more pieces shot off of him. They hammered into his dismembered hand, reattaching themselves, forcing Luffy backwards each time, until he eventually slammed into a wall, and then through it.

    Buggy laughed uproariously, even if he was damaging his own ship. It was worth it in his opinion, to teach Luffy a lesson. "How do you like that? I ate the Chop Chop Fruit, and can chop my body into pieces. Gyahaha!"

    Luffy dragged himself out of the wreckage and dusted himself off. Besides a few superficial scratches, he was no worse for wear. "Man, that''s a real freaky power."

    Said the rubber man.

    The men watching the fight, Buggy''s remaining crew, were enjoying the show. It was nice not to be on the receiving end of their Captain''s powers for once. But their attention was inevitably drawn to the beautiful woman accompanying him. A very familiar one at that.

    Nami bit her bottom lip nervously. The fight had only just begun and already it seemed like Buggy had the upper hand. She only hoped Luffy had a trick or two up his sleeve, otherwise, they were done for.

    "Hey Captain, that woman right there! She''s the one what stole our loot!" yelled the smartest of the three. Definitely not the one Nami turned into a eunuch earlier.

    Buggy turned to face the now nervous woman, "Oh, is that right. Well, once I''m done with this fool, she''s next."

    "I won''t let you!" shouted Luffy.

    "Gum Gum: Pistol!"

    Luffy thrust his own arm forward, but unlike Buggy, it didn''t separate. It stretched. It flew at Buggy with impressive speed, but he only detached his head and dodged the blow.

    "Aw too bad, but you''re way too slow to hit me. Gyhahaha!"

    Luffy growled at that, and flung his foot back, "Gum Gum: Stamp!"

    Luffy tried to Spartan kick Buggy in his chest, but like before, Buggy separated his body parts and dodged.

    "Stay still damn it!" Luffy yelled in frustration, as he tried to punch him again and again, to no avail. Everytime he thought he had him, Buggy separated and avoided his attack. He needed to think of something, and fast.

    Looking around the ship, Luffy spotted something that gave him an idea. It was a net. With an excited grin, he decided to give his new move a try.

    "Alright Buggy! Let''s see you dodge this! Gum Gum: Finger Net!"

    Luffy stretched his finger, using them to form a net, as the name would suggest. Buggy''s eyes widened, seeing the move covering him and leaving no room for escape. All his parts were stuck in the net.

    "What the hell?" he yelled, trapped by the technique. Luffy ginned as he began spinning Buggy around and around. It was the same thing Nick did when he took out Mohji. After gaining enough momentum to make Buggy sick, he released his prisoner, jumping in the air and flinging him and his detached parts away.

    Several of them hit the mast of the ship, including his head, while others struck his crew, covering them in bruises. It was a very effective test run.

    Luffy landed on the ground with a wide smile, "How was that Buggy?"

    Said pirate slowly got to his feet, willing the world to stop spinning as his body parts sluggishly reattached themselves. He was breathing heavily, and glaring at his opponent.

    "Not bad, kid. That actually hurt. Now try this! Chop Chop: Surprise!"

    The surprise was that he didn''t use his powers at all. He pretended like he was, and then pulled out a pistol and shot Luffy. It would normally be a pretty good move, but against Luffy, well¡­

    He bounced back the bullet. Buggy barely moved his head in time, getting a small cut along his cheek. His crew behind him weren''t as lucky, one of them getting hit in the arm.

    "Huh, didn''t see that one coming. Guns don''t work on you huh? What about knives? Can you bounce those back too?"

    "Nope," responded Luffy without hesitation.

    "Don''t tell him that!" shouted Nami. Why would he reveal that? Just lie, it wasn''t that hard!

    "Well, aren''t you an honest one? How rare in this day and age," Buggy mocked, much to his crew''s amusement, even if they were battered and bruised. "I think such honesty deserves a reward. What do you say boys?"

    They cheered in agreement, wanting revenge. Luffy didn''t seem to mind, in fact he almost looked eager to see what he would get. But Nami looked nervous, knowing that whatever gift Buggy was going to give, wouldn''t be a good one.

    And she doubted it was one they could return.

    Buggy separated himself once again, only this time, his body parts seemed to form some kind of wheel. His torso, arms and legs, all rearranged themselves to look like some kind of hamster wheel. His hands were on opposite ends, each one holding three, razor sharp knives.

    Buggy''s head floated up, laughing, and placed itself in the center of the wheel. The whole macabre thing was floating in the air. Nami thought it was creepy as hell, but Luffy¡­

    "So cool!"

    "Gyahahaha! Glad you think so. This is my Chop Chop: Nightmare Wheel. Get ready, Straw Hat!"

    Having said that, the wheel began to spin. Slowly at first, but quickly gaining speed, until it eventually resembled a buzzsaw. And sounded like it too. Plus with those knives spinning at either end, Buggy could easily slice Luffy into pieces.

    Something the rubber man seemed to realize, as he went from starry-eyed to steely-eyed.

    Buggy charged forward, his head laughing the whole time. He was fast, faster then either Nami or Luffy thought he''d be, but thankfully, Luffy was faster as he jumped out of the way.

    But there was something he didn''t account for. Buggy could change the wheel''s axis. It went from a vertical wheel to a horizontal one. Luffy, not expecting this, didn''t jump far enough, and received a painful slash to his side.

    "Ah!" he yelled as he tumbled to the ground, clutching his bleeding side. It wasn''t deep, thankfully, but it still hurt like hell.

    "Luffy!" Nami yelled in concern. She watched as Luffy dodged, ducked, dipped, dived, and dodged to avoid being turned into mincemeat. He was doing ok, but sooner or later, he would make another misstep. She doubted he could take too many more of those.

    There had to be something she could do. But what? Looking around the deck for something, anything, that would help, she spotted something rather peculiar. It was a pair of feet, walking along the deck, just as casual as you can be.

    Nami watched them for a second, before an evil smile graced her face. They were Buggy''s feet, they had to be. That gave her an idea.

    Luffy was getting tired of this cat and mouse game. He was also just getting tired. Buggy was relentless. No matter how many times he evaded his attack, he was right there, laughing away, ready to split him in two. Even jumping up on the mast didn''t help. And unlike Buggy, he couldn''t reattach himself.

    He was about 90% sure of that.

    "What''s wrong Straw Hat, losing steam already? Gyahahaha! Some King of the Pirates you are!"

    Luffy growled, even as he yanked his neck out of the way. This stupid clown was really getting on his nerves. He jumped out of the way to avoid another blow, only this time, he found himself slipping, hitting the floor with a painful thump.

    Looking to see what he slipped on, he was surprised to find a banana peel. Where had that come from? He knew it wasn''t there a second ago. Searching around the deck, he noticed Buggy''s crew grinning maliciously at him.

    Those jerks, they threw that banana peel in his path. Damn cheaters! He''d punch their lights out!

    But before he could exact justice upon them, Buggy was upon him. "This is the end! Now die flashily!" he yelled in jubilation. Luffy''s eyes widened in panic, he couldn''t dodge.

    So he was fairly surprised when Buggy stopped just inches from impaling him. His face contorted in agony. What happened? Luffy looked around again, before his eyes fell on Nami.

    She was holding a hammer, that she got from who knows where, and it looked as if she had smashed something on the ground. It was a¡­ foot? But who''s-that''s when it hit him. It was Buggy''s! A happy grin split his face as he laughed.

    "That hurt Damn it! Who the hell-you!?" Buggy screamed, spotting the culprit. He had nearly forgotten about her. A mistake he wouldn''t make again. But now that she had his full attention, she seemed familiar.

    A girl¡­ With orange hair¡­ And a large chest¡­

    It was her! The thief! The one from the ship. She matched the descriptions his men gave to a T. So she was the other one who had the nerve to steal from him.

    And she had the gall to do it twice! First from those two morons behind him and then from his very own room. He should have realized it earlier, but he was distracted by the so-called future king.

    Well, that wouldn''t do. That wouldn''t do at all. He would have to teach her a lesson. With all the lessons he had to give out lately, maybe he should become a teacher?

    "You! I know who you are. You''re the other thief, the one that got away," he growled, floating into the air. He started spinning once again, until he was going even faster than last time, his anger fueling him.

    "Who, me?" Nami questioned, with a nervous laugh. Drat, she was hoping he would have forgotten all about that with everything else that happened. No such luck it would seem.

    "Yes you. Tell you what, give me back what you stole, and I promise to make your death painless. Do we have a deal?"

    That proposition seemed to enrage her, "Hell no! That treasure belongs to me! I stole it so it''s mine now!"

    "Like hell it is! If you won''t give it back willingly, I''ll just pilfer it off your corpse!"

    Buggy sped off after Nami, who screamed and ran away. Luffy looked bewildered as he was completely forgotten about. But he needed to save Nami. She was his navigator after all.

    "Stop running!" Buggy yelled.

    "No!" she yelled back.

    Even Buggy''s crew seemed baffled by the turn of events. And after they set him up perfectly to take out the rubber guy too. Sometimes it was hard to be a goon.

    "When I get my hands on you, you''ll wish you were never born!" Buggy threatened.

    "Go away!" Nami pleaded, hands covering her head.

    Her pleas fell on deaf ears as Buggy neared, maniacal smile in full swing, "Now I''ve got yo-argh!"

    Nami didn''t know why he made a choking sound, and she didn''t care either. She just kept running.

    Buggy, meanwhile, found himself in quite the predicament. Luffy, the little twerp who dared proclaim himself as future king, was currently holding onto his head, a mischievous smile on his face.

    "I got you," he sang out, as Buggy looked on, worried about the pain he was about to endure.

    "Now wait just a moment," he begged, but Luffy wasn''t listening. Smile still in full swing, he stretched his head behind him, and Buggy felt his stomach twist in knots. Even if it was on the other end of the ship.

    "Gum Gum¡­"

    "No, don''t!"

    "Bell!"

    "Ahh!"

    Buggy''s screams of anguish rang out across the ship, and even across town, causing a smile to appear on Nick''s sleeping face. Recently, only dreaming about Nami could make him smile like that, which unfortunately, wasn''t the case at the moment, but exceptions could be made.

    The clown''s face was a bloody smear, his big red nose even bigger and redder, with several teeth missing from his mouth. His bell truly had been rung.

    His body, the one that was still hot on Nami''s heels, spun out of control, slamming into the floor with a bang, the force of it sending her flying. She bounced across the hard surface a few times before lying still. It hurt, but it was much better than the alternative.

    She looked around, holding her once again throbbing head. The room she was flung into looked familiar. She was sure she''d been here before. Movement caught her attention, very big movement, and Nami suddenly remembered exactly which room she was in.

    "Damn you¡­ Straw Hat," slurred Buggy. On a scale of 1-10, Buggy''s pain level was about an 8. He knew it was going to hurt, and he wasn''t disappointed, even though he wished for once he was.

    Luffy chuckled as he picked up his hat, his last technique having sent it flying, "Well Buggy, have you had enough?"

    "Screw¡­ you¡­"

    "Alright, one more oughta do it."

    That made Buggy''s eyes snap wide open. He couldn''t take another hit like that. If he did, he''d be toast for sure. So as Luffy was about to launch his head backwards, Buggy spit a wad of blood in his face.

    "Ahh! Gross!" Luffy complained. His grip on Buggy''s head loosened, which is exactly what he was waiting for. Buggy''s head went flying across the ship, meeting in the middle with the rest of his body, reassembling itself once more.

    It felt good to be whole again.

    "Hey! Spitting''s against the rules!" Luffy yelled, steaming mad at having been spit on.

    "Oh shut up! I''m a pirate! I don''t give a damn about your rules!" Buggy seethed right back. Both of them were looking angrily at each other, before they charged into battle once more.

    They both unleashed a flurry of attacks, using their Devil Fruits to evade and surprise each other. Luffy was actually able to get a few hits in this time, much to Buggy''s chagrin. That hit to the head affected him more than he realized.

    After about a minute of this furious exchange, it was becoming clear that Luffy had the upper hand. His punches, the ones he managed to land, didn''t seem to have much effect. It had to be his rubber body. It frustrated the older pirate. He needed to do something, and fast.

    "What''s that!?" Buggy yelled, pointing behind Luffy and pretending to be shocked.

    "Huh?" Luffy questioned, turning around in a hurry.

    That''s right, Buggy used the oldest trick in the book. But if it works, it works.

    "Gyahahaha! You dumbass! Chop Chop: Canon!"

    Luffy turned back around, seeing Buggy''s hand coming toward him again, he barely managed to dodge, getting a cut across his cheek, one that matched the one he gave Buggy.

    "Ah! That was a dirty tri-woah!" Luffy yelled, as he was suddenly yanked off the ground, dangling upside down. "Hey, what''s going on?"

    Looking at his foot, he saw a hand grabbing onto his ankle. That''s when he realized Buggy''s plan. That first attack was only a distraction. His true goal was to get a hold of him.

    Which he did.

    "Ah, damnit! Hey let me go!" Luffy yelled, much to Buggy''s amusement. He laughed as he approached his hapless victim, "And why would I do that? I got you right where I want you."

    Luffy tried to get out of his grip, squirming like a worm hopped up on cocaine, but it was no use. Buggy wouldn''t let him. Everytime Luffy reached for the hand holding him hostage, Buggy would shake him like a dog.

    He was trapped, at the mercy of a sadistic clown. He had a dream like that once, only the clown was thirty feet tall. He ended up punching Ace in the face as he slept, which resulted in a brawl.

    Good times.

    But all that squirming did do one thing. It knocked his hat loose. He tried to grab it, but the wind chose that moment to slap it away. "No, my hat!"

    It slowly floated down into Buggy''s waiting hand.

    "Let go Buggy! Don''t touch my hat!"

    The other pirate seemed amused by his demands, "Oh, and what are you going to do about it?" he mocked, raising Luffy''s anger to new heights.

    He inspected the hat in his hands. He didn''t know what the big deal was, it was just a straw hat. You could get one just about anywhere. They were cheap, a Beri a bundle.

    "This hat seems awfully important to you. I can''t imagine why. It''s filthy. Maybe I should give it a good wash in the ocean? Clean it up for you. Gyahahaha!"

    Luffy resumed his squirming, trying to break Buggy''s hold, "That hat is my treasure! It''s a promise I made with someone important, so don''t make fun of it!"

    Buggy merely scoffed, "Hate to break it to you kid, but this hat ain''t worth a single Beri. Treasure! Don''t make me laugh. Treasure is all things shiny and valuable, not dirty old hats. You sound just like him. He never understood it either, that red-haired bastard."

    Luffy stopped squirming at that, "Red hair? Wait, do you know Shanks, Big Nose?"

    Buggy''s mind seemed to come to a halt at the question, with no small amount of anger at the nose comment. "Do I know-yes, I know that bastard! We were on the same crew together years ago. But wait, don''t tell me¡­" his voice trailed off as he inspected the hat in his hands. It suddenly seemed very familiar. Yes, there''s even that same stain from when they had a food fight. There was little doubt in Buggy''s mind who the hat belonged to, but just to be sure¡­

    "Tell me, was it Shanks who gave you this hat?"

    "Yeah, and I promised to return it to him when I became a great pirate. So get your hands off it!"

    So it was true, that idiot really did give his hat away. How dare he.

    "One more question. Did he ever tell you who gave him this hat?"

    Luffy paused at that, "No, and I don''t care either. It belonged to Shanks, that''s all I need to know!"

    Buggy was furious that Shanks would give away their Captain''s old hat. This little punk wasn''t good enough to polish that man''s shoes, let alone wear his hat. What was Shanks thinking? Just what did he see in this kid?

    He heard a rumor that Shanks had lost an arm as well, and now this kid shows up wearing his hat? It couldn''t be a coincidence.

    Didn''t matter. He was about to die, and the hat would belong to him, the way it should have always been. He''d have to give Shanks a piece of his mind if he ever saw him again.

    Buggy walked to the side of the ship, Luffy floating along with him, until he was dangling the rubber man above the sea. "Devil Fruits all have the same weakness you know? Whoever eats one is cursed by the sea, and can never swim again."

    "This is the end for you, Straw Hat."

    ***Line Break***

    Nami really hated this ship. Why is it every time she comes here, a stupid bear tries to eat her? Is it because she''s pretty? Do bears prefer to eat pretty people? If so, she couldn''t blame them. If she were a cannibal, she''d prefer to eat good looking people as well.

    Anyway, after being flung into the lounging area again, she ran into her old friend, Beary. Not that she knew that was the bear''s name. And he was not happy to see her again, no siree.

    Or maybe he was. Afterall, he was given a second chance to maul her to death. That should make him happy, right?

    If she got eaten, she hoped he choked.

    Her ears twitched as she heard a door creak open. She covered her mouth, and peaked out from behind the clothes that concealed her. She managed to avoid the bear earlier and hid herself in the dressing room, deeper in Buggy''s ship.

    She could see his shadow, slowly entering the room, and heard him sniff and grunt as he searched for her. Each clawed appendage clacking against the wooden floor as he wondered about the room.

    He was in full view now, and to her slight surprise, his fur looked pristine. It was like he was never on fire in the first place. She wondered if maybe they gave him a bath. Well, good for him.

    She leaned back deeper into the standing closet, completely obscuring her form in shadows. With any luck, the strong smell of perfume and oils would hide her scent. She hoped it would, she wasn''t sure she could escape if it didn''t.

    After a while, the bear approached her hiding spot, opened the closet and stuck his snout inside. She shut her eyes tight, holding back tears, as she felt his hot breath against her face.

    But luck seemed to be on her side as he suddenly vacated the closet. She let out the breath she was holding. A bit too loudly.

    Suddenly the bear was right in her face, roaring in anger and victory. Nami screamed back, throwing anything and everything she could at the bear. A bottle of lotion, a can of nuts, a whoopie cushion, a rubber duck¡­ One such thing happened to be a jar of body glitter that smashed against his snout.

    Beary flinched back, sneezing bright silver glitter all over the room. He swiped at his nose, trying to get the offending material out, but had no such luck. He rubbed it against the floor and all over the clothes in the room.

    Eventually he removed it, and sat back on his hindquarters in relief. The sound of a door slamming caught his attention. Turning to the now closed door, he looked back into the closet and realized his prey had escaped.

    Nami sighed in relief, her back resting against the door, eyes closed. That was too close. But she couldn''t stop now. Any moment now, that bear would realize she escaped, and start chasing her again. She needed to get away, and fast.

    "Hello again sweetheart. Fancy meeting you here."

    Nami''s eyes opened wide, and a scream of pain left her lips as she felt a hand yank on her hair. Looking up through teary eyes, she discovered it was none other than Mr. Eunuch, giving her a twisted smile. One that promised pain and retribution.

    "What do you think you''re-ah!" she yelled, as he once more jerked on her hair.

    "Ah, ah, ah, I didn''t say you could speak. The only thing I want to hear coming from those pretty little lips are screams of pain, and pleas for mercy. Got it?"

    Nami glared up at him defiantly, which only caused him to chuckle, "That''s a nice look in your eyes. Let''s see how long it lasts, shall we?"

    He started pulling her deeper into the ship, but Nami refused to cooperate. She wouldn''t go with this creep, even if it cost her, her hair. It may have not been a look she could pull off, but it was far better than the alternative.

    Her captor was getting frustrated. This bitch just wouldn''t do as she was told. Why did she have to make his life difficult? All he wanted to do was torture her until all that spunk and fire she had inside her soul vanished. Was that too much to ask for? After she broke his balls?

    He didn''t think so.

    Just then, a rage filled roar garnered their attention. Looking at the door, the one they hadn''t moved away from, they could hear the angry snorts of a bear. They could also hear violent clacking sounds getting closer and closer.

    Nami recognized those sounds. They were the sounds the bear''s paws made as he wandered about the room. He must have finally figured out she escaped him, and was charging the door, enraged.

    Which was bad for multiple reasons, not the least of which was that she was right in front of the door, and would certainly be smashed to pieces. That was something she would like to avoid.

    Silver lining though, the dickless wonder was also tight in front of the door, and it looked as if his pea sized brain was trying to figure out what the sound was. Which, incidentally, loosed his grip on her hair just enough for her to escape.

    Ripping her head away with a painful grunt, several strands of her hair remained clutched in the man''s hands. He seemed shocked by the turn of events. You think he''d be used to it by now, this was the third time after all.

    But he''d be even more shocked when an angry bear burst the door open and flattened him against the wall. The bear was in a similar state of disbelief, as he watched one of his comrades slowly slide down the wall into the blissful realm of unconsciousness.

    "Thanks a ton Mr. Bear," Nami said, blowing him a kiss and running away, back up the stairs and out of the ship. Beary looked at Nami, then at the man on the floor, then back to Nami, then back to the man¡­

    He did this for several seconds, before everything clicked in his mind. Now seeing red, he stormed up the stairs after the girl. He was definitely going to eat her when he caught her, even if it would ruin his diet.

    He would just count it as his cheat day.

    Making it up the stairs, he looked around the lounge area for his prey, but saw nothing. It was another game of cat and mouse. How annoying.

    He once more began sniffing for her, but the smell of booze and tobacco hampered his ability. He cursed those idiots for indulging in such things, making his job harder. They were lucky they gave such good belly rubs, or he''d have no use for them.

    Nami was once again holding her breath, hiding behind the counter of the bar. It was the same place Nick fled too when he fought the bear, and doused him in alcohol. A strategy Nami would not be employing, as it already turned out to be ineffective.

    But maybe there was something else. The glitter earlier was surprisingly effective, maybe there was something similar she could use? Targeting his olfactory senses seemed like a good idea. Better than setting him on fire at any rate.

    Maybe something that got rid of his sight as well. Looking around the bar, all she saw was booze, booze, and more booze. She liked to drink as much as anybody, and if she and the bear got into a drinking contest she would win, hands down. But somehow, she didn''t think that was a viable plan.

    Crawling around on the sticky floor, Nami quietly kept up the search, pausing occasionally as the bear got too close. Then, something caught her eye.

    An open cabinet, with a jar of something barely visible through the crack. Taking a chance and slowly opening the door, wincing at the slight squeak it made, revealed a jar of some bright red powder. She took it from the bottom shelf and read the label.

    Desert Reaper Powder. Warning: Extremely HOT. Use with caution.

    That was perfect. She would burn that sucker face right off. Hopefully, it would burn better than the fire. Fingers crossed.

    Now all she needed to do was get his attention. She only had one shot at this, and needed to make it count.

    "Hey there Mr. Bear. Long time no see. A bit early to be hitting the sauce don''t you think? But who am I to judge?"

    The bear paused his search and turned to the voice, finding it to be the person he was searching for. In retrospect, the bar should have been the first place he looked. He would be sure to remember that for the next intruder.

    Beary approached the bar, slowly, with his head down and giving a low growl. Nami seemed to be nervous at his posture, but continued with the bit anyway. She needed him close, and hopefully, confused.

    "So what''ll be? A Martini? No, you don''t seem the type. How about a Margarita?"

    With each suggestion, Nami pulled out different bottles of booze, but Beary didn''t seem interested, and kept up his slow, menacing gait, making Nami more and more nervous with every step he took. But she needed him just a little bit closer.

    "Not a fan of that either, huh? I get it. Let''s see, how about a Mimosa then, it''s about the right time for one."

    Beary didn''t understand why she was offering him drinks, and he didn''t care either. Even if that last suggestion sounded pretty good, Mimosa''s happened to be his favorite. But unlike those human fools, he had some self control. He wouldn''t indulge himself until his job was complete.

    Though, if he could speak English, he would tell her he liked his drink with a bit of ginger in it.

    (Get it? Cause Nami''s a ginger and he wants to eat her.)

    Nami was sweating heavily at this point. The bear was leaning on the counter now, both deadly claws propped up on the wooden surface and making deep grooves.

    "I see you''re a bear of refined taste. In that case I have just the thing. It just arrived this morning, and it''s got a real kick to it."

    Nami dove behind the counter once more, her form disappearing from view. Beary was confused by her behavior. Did she go mad? It didn''t matter, once she popped her head back up, he would take a bite out of her little orange head.

    And pop up she did. With a dazzling smile that hid her nervousness, "Alright, here it is. Enjoy!"

    Nami then popped off the lid, or at least she tried to. But the damn thing was stuck. She screamed bloody murder in her mind, but on the outside, she kept up her beaming smile. "It''ll be just another minute. Come on you stupid thing, open."

    Nami whispered the last part as she turned away from the bear and pulled with all her might, face turning red from the exertion. Beary tilted his head confused, but decided it didn''t matter. It was lunch time.

    Leaning over the bar counter, he opened his mouth wide, tongue flopping out and dripping drool. He was just about to take a bite, when suddenly-

    "Gah!"

    Nami managed to get the lid off, but she wasn''t expecting the jar to go flying out of her hands¡­

    And smash directly into Beary.

    That might not have gone exactly to plan, but the end result was the same.

    Beary stood there for a moment, and Nami could swear she saw smoke coming off of him, before he let loose a bellow of agony. He flung himself back, giving no heed to the chairs and tables he smashed to pieces. All that mattered was the all encompassing pain he was in.

    His eyes, his nose, his mouth, all felt like someone dumped lava into them. Flames erupted from his mouth as he rolled on the ground, trying to ease his suffering. But nothing seemed to help.

    Nami almost felt bad for him until she remembered he was trying to eat her not even a minute ago. With that thought came the loss of any sympathy.

    But it was time to go. Alas, partings could be such sweet sorrow. Or no sorrow at all. Sometimes, it was just sweet.

    Nami quickly raced out of the lounge, eager to be out in the open air once more. Beary could hear her footsteps as she raced ahead, his ears being the only thing not affected by the powder.

    Did she really think he was just going to let her go? Not a snowball''s chance in hell. Pushing through the agony, he forced his eyes open, barely making out her form. Everything was blurry, but he wouldn''t let that stop him. She wouldn''t escape.

    He was the fastest bear alive after all.

    With a flame expelling roar, he rushed after her, barreling through anything in his path. Nami heard him, and turned around, only to release a scream of fright.

    "Are you kidding me!? Give it a rest already!"

    Why did he have to be so persistent? That wasn''t an attractive quality in a man, and most certainly not in a bear. Sometimes, you just have to give up.

    But Beary obviously didn''t get that memo. Tears streaked out of his eyes as he thundered after her.

    Nami made it out of the ship, finally, and charged out on the deck. She barely even noticed the other goon as she passed him. He wasn''t important anyway.

    "Huh?" he said stupidly as she passed. "Hey isn''t she-ah!"

    But he was interrupted by a 900 pound bear smashing through him, sending him flying with a painful scream. This had to have been the worst couple of days of his entire life. Maybe it was time to rethink his career choices?

    Buggy and Luffy turned their heads to see what all the fuss was about. "Now what?" Buggy questioned, irritated. He didn''t need any interruptions now, not when he was about to end this nuisance once and for all.

    Running towards them was the beautiful Nami, hands flailing in the air and panicked tears running down her face as she was chased by a fire breathing bear.

    "It''s that woman¡­ and is that Beary?" asked Buggy. What was he doing here? Just what was that woman up to? Well, it didn''t matter, it was too late for her to do anything. Straw Hat was going for a swim, and there wasn''t a damn thing she could do about it.

    "Nami, is that you!?" he yelled, not able to see her very clearly from his current angle. The tears stopped falling from her eyes as she heard his voice. "Huh, Luffy?"

    She looked around for him before she spotted him dangling in the air, directly over the sea. "What are you doing up there?" she yelled, watching him struggle in Buggy''s grasp.

    "He tricked me and now I''m stuck! You have to get me down!"

    "And how the hell am I supposed to do that!?" Did he think she could fight him? If Luffy couldn''t beat him, then she sure as hell couldn''t.

    "I don''t know! But do something, hurry! I can''t swim!"

    "What do you mean you can''t swim!"

    That''s when she remembered that rumor about Devil Fruit users. They were granted amazing powers, but they came at a cost. So they were true then?

    If only she had known that sooner, she would have dumped Buggy''s disgusting feet into the water. Oh well, too late for regrets now.

    But what was she supposed to do? The image of Nick and Bell-m¨¨re flashed through her mind, and a new resolve coursed through her. It didn''t matter how, all that mattered was she did it.

    "Got it! You can count on me!"

    Buggy seemed to think that was hilarious, laughing loudly, "Gyahaha! And just how do you intend to do that?"

    That was a good question. Angry bear behind her, sadistic clown in front. Her options were limited. But there had to be something¡­

    Maybe she could use said bear? He was charging her with reckless abandon after all, so perhaps she could use that to knock Buggy off the ship. It was worth a shot.

    That''s when she noticed something in her path. Something bright and yellow. It was a banana peel, the same one used to trip Luffy earlier.

    That could work.

    Nami altered her course, leading the angry bear directly in its path, the banana nestled between Buggy and the bear. Perfect. Now, as long as he stepped on it¡­

    Beary, eyes blinded with extreme chili powder, wasn''t able to see the bright yellow banana peel, laying in his path. Luck seemed to be on Nami''s side as his front paw landed right on it, sending him tumbling head over heels past Nami, who jumped out of the way.

    "No, wait! Beary stop!" yelled Buggy in a panic, watching the bear tolling toward him with increasing speed. But it was no use. Beary couldn''t stop even if he wanted to.

    "Ouch!" The clown pirate yelled in pain. He flinched and yanked his hand back toward him, sending the rubber man flopping onto the ship. Looking at his hand, he noticed clear and distinct bite marks. That little monkey boy bit him!

    "You''ll pay for that," Buggy started, but was interrupted by the sight of Beary almost upon him. The pain and shock of being bitten made him forget all about that. With a panicked shout, Beary slammed into him.

    As Buggy was struck, he loosened his grip on Luffy''s hat. He gave a last, hateful look at them both, as he and Beary smashed through the railing of the ship and tumbled toward the sea below.

    "Alright!" Nami cheered, pumping her fist in victory, looking relieved as Luffy''s arm snapped back, his hat in his hand.

    "Is it over? Did we win?" she questioned tentatively. Luffy inspected his hat for damages, and when he was satisfied there was none, he placed it back in his head.

    "I don''t think so," he said. Both of them stared at the spot Buggy disappeared, half expecting another surprise attack. But nothing came. It was quiet. Too quiet.

    Nami noticed movement from the corner of her eye. It was Buggy''s feet. That''s when she realized he must have detached them before he went over the never did hear a splash. So that means¡­

    Her eyes widened, "Luffy¡­"

    He turned to see what had her so freaked out, only to see the image of Buggy floating in the sky, his body separated into dozens of parts, making him look three times his normal size. But the most worrying part of all, was the palpable red aura that surrounded him.

    "Nami, get back," Luffy told her without a hint of his usual mirth. Nami nodded and did as she was told without complaint. It wasn''t the time.

    Buggy watched them both, seething in anger. He was tired of his plans ending in failure. Every time he started to enjoy himself, something came along and ruined his fun. No more! He would put an end to this right now.

    "Playtime is over, Straw Hat. It''s time for you to die," he said, evenly and calmly. It would have been far less frightening if he was ranting and raving. But it seems he was finally taking this seriously.

    He floated higher in the sky, his body parts swirling around him in a violent vortex. Luffy raised his fists, ready to defend himself.

    It was time for round two.

 Chapter 11

    Nami flinched at the sound of meat hitting meat. The battle was fierce, neither one giving an inch of ground. Luffy was surrounded by a vortex of limbs, all attempting to bombard him.

    Something that normally wouldn''t be very effective, not against Luffy''s rubber body. But somehow, he was dealing damage to him. Nami could see the bruises accumulating with every blow that got past Luffy''s defenses.

    The rubber man was doing well in Nami''s opinion. He punched and kicked against Buggy''s oncoming body parts, sending them soaring away. The ones he couldn''t, he dodged.

    But unfortunately, some of them slipped through. Luffy was good, but there were just too many fleshy projectiles being thrown at him. If only there were a few less, Luffy could get the upper hand.

    Both of them were slowing down, it was clear they were exhausted, but Luffy was slowing faster. It was only a matter of time before the accumulated damage became too much to bear.

    Something needed to be done. But what? What could she do to help in this situation? She could feel every blow they exchanged like a shockwave. She couldn''t go near that.

    But maybe¡­ she didn''t have to. Watching closely, it was obvious that they couldn''t keep going much longer. Luffy''s arms took longer to extend and snap back, and the same was true for Buggy as well.

    She could see that when Luffy knocked something away it would take Buggy longer and longer to return them to battle. Not enough to give Luffy an edge, but enough for Nami to notice. And that gave her an idea.

    All she had to do was sneak by them, and get something from the ship. How hard could that be?

    ***Line Break***

    Luffy was breathing heavily. Heavier than he had in a long time. The fight took a turn he didn''t expect. Buggy was stronger than he thought, and was able to hurt him for some reason. Being made of rubber, he was used to not feeling blunt blows. But this almost felt like getting hit by his grandpa.

    Sure, Buggy wasn''t nearly as strong as Garp, but like him, he was able to bypass his Devil Fruit power somehow. Was it that red glow that was surrounding him?

    Luffy saw a piece of Buggy''s torso flying at him and got an idea. He jumped on top of it, using it as a surfboard. "Hey, this is kind of fun!" Luffy shouted as he flew through the air.

    "What do you think you''re doing!? Get off of there!" Buggy shouted, sending his parts after his other part. Luffy knocked away any that got too close.

    "Nuh uh," Luffy responded by sticking his tongue out at him. Buggy growled, and launched more of himself at the rubber bastard.

    Luffy grinned as he began using Buggy''s parts as a spring board, bouncing around between them like a pinball machine. This caused several of the pieces to slam into each other, causing Buggy to give off a painful wince each time.

    He needed a new strategy, and he had just the one. As Luffy landed on another of Buggy''s parts, he suddenly found himself in an empty sky. There was no where else he could jump to. He looked around confused for a moment, before laughing caught his attention.

    "Gyahaha! I have you now, Straw Hat! There''s nowhere left to run!" Buggy said, surrounded by all his body parts. However, he wouldn''t need all of them, just his hands. He connected them both at the wrist, each holding three knives between their fingers facing away from each other.

    Then it began to spin, much like his Nightmare Wheel, only much smaller, and much faster. With a savage grin, he launched at Luffy.

    "Chop Chop: Buzzsaw!"

    With panicked eyes, Luffy searched for an escape. Luckily, he just so happened to find one. The mast of the ship. He jumped away, just as the attack reached him, stretching his arms and grabbing hold of the mast, withdrawing his arms and pulling himself toward it.

    He looked back, only to see the spinning blades almost on him. With a yelp, he jumped over them, the blades passing by harmlessly underneath. He wiped the sweat from his brow, releasing a relieved sigh. That was too close.

    "Don''t think you''re out of the woods yet, Straw Hat!"

    "Hm?" Luffy turned to the voice, only to see Buggy''s head, all alone. That''s weird, wasn''t he just surrounded by a bunch of creepy limbs? Where are they?

    Luffy''s thoughts would be answered in the form of a leg piece hitting his own. He fell over, desperately grabbing onto the mast. Looking around, he could see parts of Buggy all around him. He was surrounded.

    A buzzing sound reached his ears, and Luffy jumped to his feet and began running down the horizontal part of the mast, barely avoiding the spinning blade. But that was only the beginning of his problems. All of the Buggy parts began hurling themselves at him.

    He twisted and dodged as best he could, but it was a struggle doing so and keeping his balance, and eventually, he lost it. His foot came down at an awkward angle, and he tumbled off the edge, Buggy''s body parts rushing after him.

    He fell with ever increasing speed, and to his right, a buzzing was approaching him again. He was getting really sick of that move. So when it got near him, he twisted his body, barely managed to not get skewered, and used his momentum to throw a punch upwards, right in the center, where Buggy''s hands were connected.

    It connected, and the hands split apart, flying in different directions, with Buggy screaming from down below.

    "That hurt you bastard!"

    "It was supposed to!"

    But the floor was approaching fast, and Luffy didn''t want to know how that would feel. So he began to draw in air, expanding himself more and more.

    "Gum Gum: Balloon!"

    Now filled with air he hit the ground and bounced, some of Buggy''s sections slamming into the ground after him. He bounced and rolled, evading more of them. But when his air ran out, Luffy bounced one more time and landed on his feet running.

    More and more of Buggy rained down toward him, but Luffy was able to dodge them all. Or he would have been, if it weren''t for Buggy hands grabbing onto his legs and tripping him.

    "I''ve got you now!" Buggy yelled in triumph.

    "What the-aw, damn it!" he cursed, as the remaining body parts crashed into him. He screamed in pain as he was mercilessly pummeled, Buggy laughing the whole time.

    "Gyahahaha! That''s what you get for challenging me Straw Hat!"

    He looked on with glee as Luffy lay there, coughing and spitting blood. It was a good look for him, one that Buggy would be more than happy to dress him in again and again.

    He recalled his segments to him, grinning as they all floated around him. It was about time the rubber bastard went down. He hadn''t used Haki in a long time, he didn''t need to. The East Blue was filled with weaklings. Afterall, you don''t use a cannon to kill an ant.

    But Straw Hat was no ant. He was a ferocious and hungry beast attempting to claw and bite its way to the top. But he would never reach that summit, Buggy would make sure of that.

    "You did good, for a newborn baby pirate that is. But this is as far as you go. It''s time to end this farce."

    Luffy''s fingers twitched at that. He coughed up more blood, and grit his teeth. He forced himself to stand, inch by inch, until he was on his feet. He swayed a bit before finding his ground again, and leveled Buggy with a glare.

    "I will be¡­ King of the Pirates! There''s no way I''d lose to you! Gum Gum¡­"

    He threw both of his arms back, stretching them past the deck of the ship. Buggy cursed and drew his segment into a wall in front of his head. That was his only weak spot. "Just try it! I''ll show you the difference between us!"

    "Chop Chop: Barricade!"

    "...Bazooka!"

    Luffy thrust his arms forward with more force than any previous attack. It slammed into Buggy''s wall and the two clashed for a minute, sparks of power shooting off of them. They both screamed as they attempted to overpower the other.

    It would end in a draw. Luffy couldn''t push through, but Buggy couldn''t stop his limbs from flying everywhere. They both glared at each other, breathing heavily, covered in sweat and dirt and blood.

    "You''re a real¡­ pain in the ass¡­ you know that¡­ Straw Hat¡­" Buggy gasped out.

    "Right¡­ back at ya¡­" Luffy wheezed.

    Neither one was willing to back down, but neither one could continue much longer. Both of them were pulling out all the stops to beat the other.

    Buggy floated his parts into the sky once more, only there was something off. Looking around confused, he didn''t notice anything amiss. Maybe he was just being paranoid.

    Whatever, it was time to end this. He began to rotate his floating parts, spinning them faster and faster.

    "Are you ready Straw Hat?" he questioned.

    "That''s my line," Luffy responded, pulling his arms back.

    "Then let''s finish this! Chop Chop: Festival!"

    "Gum Gum: Gatling!"

    Buggy sent all of his pieces at Luffy, who began to throw punches so fast it looked like he had a dozen arms. The two met in the middle with a thunderous bang, meeting each other blow for blow.

    Neither one could get past the other. Buggy had too many parts and Luffy threw too many punches. It was a war of attrition. One that each was determined to win.

    Luffy winced from every punch. Whatever strange technique Buggy was using hurt like hell. If his bones weren''t made of rubber, his hands would be in pieces by now. As it were, they were merely a bloody mess. But he wasn''t afraid of pain, no matter how bad it got. He would push through it all. How else would he become King?

    Buggy growled in a combination of pain and frustration. No matter how many times he thrust himself at that little twerp, he responded with equal force. He wouldn''t last much longer, but as long as he outlasted him, he could live with that.

    The boat rocked and churned up the water below from the force of the exchange. To the people on the island it sounded like an endless drumming of thunder.

    "W-what the hell is that?" asked Michi, as everything around her seemed to shake.

    "I don''t know!" screamed Boodle, as he tried to hold the patients down. He didn''t want them to exacerbate their injuries by falling on the ground.

    Back with the fight, Luffy and Buggy continue to throw everything they had into this exchange. Neither one gave an inch. Both refusing to take a single step back. But it wouldn''t last for long. Sooner or later, one of them would slip up.

    One of them¡­

    "Ah! Damn it!" yelled Buggy, after getting punched in the face. Blood trickled down his nose from the blow. What was going on? How was he getting through? It shouldn''t be possible!

    Then, over the sound of battle, he heard a voice. It sounded like a woman. A woman complaining about something. God he hated that sound. But where was it coming from?

    He turned his floating head this way and that, until he spotted her. That orange haired woman that thought she could steal from him. But what was she up to?

    She was bent over something, which allowed Buggy to appreciate the view, and looked like she was trying to stuff something into a¡­ box? No, a chest? She was trying to stuff something into a chest! That was it.

    She was trying to rob him again! As if he would allow that!

    "Get your hands off my treasure you tramp!"

    Nami jumped up and turned around, face paling as Buggy finally noticed her. "What do you want now? Why can''t you just leave me alone!" she shouted.

    "Maybe I would if you kept your grubby little off of my¡­ booty?"

    His confusion was understandable once you realized she wasn''t stealing his treasure. There was no gold in her chest even though her chest was pure gold. No, the thing she was stealing was Buggy himself. His body parts stuffed into a chest making it look more like a casket.

    And the thing she was trying to force inside, but was refusing to go, just so happened to be his lower half. She wasn''t using the front, that was something she refused to touch. No she was pushing on his¡­

    "Get your hands off my ass!"

    "Like I want to touch it!"

    He growled, hatred coursing through his veins. So that''s why Straw Hat was able to punch him in the nose. She was stealing parts of him that flew off, and stuffing them inside that box. Making it so that he had less ammunition to work with.

    Well he couldn''t have that. Time to show her where she belongs. In the trash!

    His hand flew off, grabbing a knife as it did so, and went straight toward Nami. Luffy called out her name in panic. Caught up in her own fright, Nami looked for a way to escape. But there wasn''t one. If she ran she would just get stabbed in the back.

    As the knife drew closer, Nami did the only thing she could think of. She used a shield. A human shield. A Buggy shield. She grabbed hold of Buggy''s lower extremity and placed it between her and impending impalement.

    "No!" Buggy screamed in alarm. He tried to stop his hand, but it was too late. It soared fast and true, right into his ass.

    "Ahh! My ass!" he shrieked. His attack against Luffy started to slow, allowing more and more of Luffy''s punches to get through. Just one final push, and he would be able to claim victory.

    A push that Nami was more than happy to provide, even if she didn''t know it.

    Nmai dropped his lower half onto the floor, huffing in fright, letting her nerves finally calm. That was close. Too close.

    Then her fear turned into anger. With a growl Nami raised her foot in the air, and stomped down hard on Buggy''s Buggy Balls. "Take that you jerk!"

    Buggy let out a sound that was part scream, part sob, and part gag. He was in more pain than he could ever remember being in. Getting headbutt by that rubber asshole paled by comparison.

    This was the worst day in Buggy''s life. And it wasn''t over yet. With the sheer agony he was experiencing, the violent red aura that had been surrounding him finally dissipated. He also halted his attack against Luffy, which allowed him to pummel Buggy completely unimpeded.

    Buggy felt the blows fall upon him like he was in a rainstorm, and he was getting soaking wet. And without his Haki, he was unable to defend himself even a little. They drove him back further and further, until one final punch, one last Gum Gum: Pistol, sent him hurtling into the wall.

    He spit out a gob of blood, head slowly falling to the ground, as the rest of his body landed next to him. He was done. Buggy had been defeated.

    "We¡­ we did it!" shouted Nami, throwing her hands in the air in celebration, cheering loudly. Luffy stared at the beaten form of Buggy, his face looking like someone put it through a meat grinder.

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    That someone was Luffy.

    Nami approached the rubber man, taking note of his own bruised and bloody form. His left eye was swollen shut, his lip was split open, and wet blood dripped down his face. His hands looked like someone took sandpaper to them, bits and pieces of flesh dangling uselessly.

    He looked almost as bad as Buggy, the battle having taken its toll. She stopped next to Luffy, asking if he was alright. He was silent for a moment, before telling her he would be fine with some meat. She wasn''t so sure about that, but decided against arguing.

    "So, what should we do with him?" she asked, staring down at Buggy. He was unconscious and unresponsive. Considering he was just a head surrounded by the rest of his dismembered body, it was a rather gruesome scene.

    "I don''t know," he said, taking a thinking pose. Their gaze swept across the ship before it landed on the treasure chest holding the rest of his body. They gave each other a look before identical grins erupted on their faces.

    That would work.

    After stuffing Buggy with the rest of him, and locking him up tight, Nami proceeded to do two things. One, she robbed them. She took all of his treasure that wasn''t nailed down, filling up a whole big bag of it. While she was doing that, Luffy helped himself to their pantry, leaving it completely barren.

    And two, she set the ship to sail adrift, away from the town. With any luck it would crash and sink to the bottom of the ocean, taking Buggy and what little crew he had left with it. They could have just thrown him overboard and been done with it, but that would leave a bad taste in both of their mouths.

    Luffy didn''t mind it if he killed someone in battle, but ending a helpless person just felt wrong. Nami agreed. That was a line she wasn''t ready to cross just yet.

    Well, she would cross it for one person...

    With that done it was time to return to the island. Unfortunately for her, there were no lifeboats, so there was no way back to shore. No way except for a rocket ride. With reluctant tears in her eyes, she accepted her fate.

    ***Line Break***

    A mob of villagers descended on the town, each of them carrying a weapon of some sort. Or something that could be used as a weapon, like shovels and pitchforks. After they heard the massive explosions ring out across the island, they decided enough was enough. They would take back their island or die trying.

    They know Boodle said it would be ok, that he found some help, but they just couldn''t sit back and wait any longer. They had to do something.

    So here they were in the center of town, searching for the pirates. Only to find nothing but destruction. Piles and piles of rubble lined the streets, bringing many to tears as they recognized their homes.

    "Damn it! Where are those bastards?" yelled one, a sentiment they all shared. They all started screaming for them to come out. Screams that would soon be answered as they heard footsteps approaching.

    Turning to the sound, and readying their makeshift weapons, the townsfolk prepared for battle. They charged toward the noise, shouting like there was no tomorrow, only to stop short when they met a familiar face.

    Boodle fell on his ass in surprise when he turned the corner only to see a mob rushing toward him, a loud yelp leaving his mouth. When he saw who it was, he shouted at them angrily, "Just what the hell do you think you''re doing!? You almost gave me a heart attack!"

    The villagers looked sheepish, lowering their weapons. "Sorry mayor. We just thought¡­"

    "Thought I was just some pirate, no doubt. Well, lucky for you I''m not. I thought I told you all I found some people who were going to help. What are you doing here?" he asked them, giving them a stern look. It was the look of a disappointed grandpa.

    "We couldn''t just sit back and do nothing while they wrecked our town!" yelled someone in the crowd as the rest voiced their support.

    Boodle shook with rage, "You idiots!"

    His angry shout shut them up. They watched in confusion as he trembled, "Mayor¡­"

    "Now you listen here and you listen good! A town isn''t made of brick and stone, it''s made of people. Without all of you, it''s no different than a pile of dirt. An empty house can''t be called a home, so don''t be so ready to throw your lives away! Do you understand me!"

    The townsfolk all dropped their weapons as tears flowed down their faces. The mayor''s speech and concern touched them deeply. He was right. They were the town, not the buildings. They could replace anything they lost except for their own lives.

    Boodle smiled warmly at his people as they seemed to understand. That young lady, Nami, was absolutely correct when she expressed a similar sentiment to Michi. A sentiment he nearly forgot. He would hold that lesson close to his chest until the day he died. And now it was passed onto all of them as well.

    After they all calmed down, they had some questions for the Mayor. Ones that were asked rapid fire without giving him the chance to answer.

    "One at a time!" he shouted, fed up. They returned to giving him sheepish looks again. Boodle sighed, these darn kids.

    "Where are the pirates?" was the first question asked, the one foremost on their minds.

    "Two of Buggy''s commanders have been defeated along with most of his crew. The only one remaining is Buggy himself."

    "Who''s fighting him?"

    "A young man with a straw hat named Luffy. He has powers like Buggy, so he''s our best bet of beating him."

    "What about Michi? Is she alright?"

    "Michi''s just fine, she''s treating two young men who were seriously injured by Buggy''s men. They were also the ones who took down his commanders."

    It went like that until they ran out of questions, and Boodle led them back toward the pet store, where Chouchou was still guarding his store, much to everyone''s relief. Chouchou was a big part of the town, everyone loved him, and were glad to see him alive.

    Said dog wagged his tail as the rest of the village approached, happily receiving head pats and belly rubs. But as this was happening, Boodle noticed someone missing. Mohji. He must have recovered enough to slink away when no one was looking. As long as he didn''t cause any more trouble, Boodle was happy enough to leave it at that.

    Then they heard a rock skid across the ground, and everything stopped. The talking, the crying, and even the belly rubs. They all watched the direction the rock came from, expecting an attack. They held their weapons up and Chouchou growled.

    "I really don''t understand your stomach. You ate everything on that ship, how can you possibly want more food?"

    "I can''t help it, they had a lot of vegetables for some reason. And I need meat to recover. Meat!"

    "Ugh, you''re impossible, you know that?"

    "No, I''m Luffy."

    The whole village looked on bewildered as a beautiful young woman carrying a large sack over her shoulder and a young man in a straw hat walked into view. The boy looked worse for wear, with numerous injuries all over his body, and even the girl looked like she had a rough time.

    "It''s you!" shouted Boodle with glee. The throng of people parted, making way for him. He reached the front of the crowd and stopped, looking immensely relieved. "I feared the worst had happened when those shockwaves hit the town. I''m glad to see you''re both safe."

    The rest of them looked confused, until they remembered him mentioning a boy in a straw hat. This had to be him, the one that fought Buggy. And if he was here, then that means¡­

    "So, what happened? Is Buggy¡­" Boodle started, but couldn''t bring himself to finish the sentence. Couldn''t bring himself to hope. Could the nightmare truly be over?

    Luffy gave him a big grin, pumping his fist, "Don''t worry old guy. I kicked his ass."

    The whole area was silent for a moment, before cheers erupted. Tears of joy ran down their faces, as they hugged their loved ones. The relief was palpable, and Nami and Luffy were happy to see it.

    "That reminds me, is Michi around? I have something for her," Nami said, placing the massive sack on the ground.

    "I''m right here dear. Had to see what all the commotion was about. Now what''s this you say you have for me?" asked the old woman as she made her way out of the building. Nami''s eyes lit up when she saw her and moved the bag in front of her.

    "Just a little gift," she said. Michi raised an eyebrow at that. Little? The sack was almost as big as her. How had she carried it? Well, she wasn''t one to refuse a gift, so she slowly opened the bag as everyone watched on.

    Nami had a big grin on her face as Michi got the bag open, revealing a horde of shimmering, golden treasure, sparkling in the sun. Michi''s eyes widened, along with the whole town who were hovering around her.

    "Wha¡­ but I¡­ it''s just¡­" Michi didn''t have the words to express her shock at what she was seeing. Nami''s smile turned soft and gentle as she watched the flabbergasted old woman.

    "That should help you rebuild the town. I''m sure you''ll make it better than ever."

    The town was quiet before they started cheering louder than ever. Michi waddled over to Nami and gave her a bone crushing hug, thanking her repeatedly. It made the sacrifice all worth it to Nami. Sure she could have used it to help with her own problems, but seeing the look on the old woman''s face as she hugged her¡­

    Yeah, she made the right decision.

    "Thank you so much dear. Now you really must meet my grandson."

    "That''s not necessary!"

    ***Line Break***

    Nick slowly opened his eyes, and almost immediately wished he hadn''t. Everything was in pain. His entire body seemed to protest its existence. And this is why he didn''t want to fight the furry. He knew it would only cause him pain.

    Although he couldn''t put the entire blame on Mohji. Buggy had a pretty big part to play as well, with the whole torture thing. But even that wouldn''t have happened if it wasn''t for the bear.

    That''s where all his problems started. The bear. If he ever saw Beary again, he would make sure to shave him bald. Let the world experience that nightmare fuel.

    But the pain in his body wasn''t what woke him up. That was just the icing on the cake. No, what roused him from the blissful, painless realm of Morpheus, was the sound of someone else in pain.

    Misery does love company.

    The sound was coming from a door to the right. Someone, a man by the sound of it, was having the worst day of his life. It sounded like he''s been constipated his whole life and now everything was shooting out of him at once.

    Nick would take his injuries any day of the week. Because that sound¡­

    "Hrgh, ahh. Damn it!"

    No, just no.

    "Don''t worry about him, he''s fine," said a voice to his left. Turning his head, which was far more difficult and painful then it had any right to be, Nick was greeted to the visage that kept him up at night

    And gave him wood in the morning.

    It was Nami, sporting a low cut, light blue shirt, (Which made Nick thank Jesus) and a pair of shorts that barely qualified as such. (Which made him thank Jesus again)

    She was standing there with her hand on her hip. Seeing that she had his attention, she sauntered into the room and sat down in the chair next to him. This allowed him to see her state of injury.

    It wasn''t too bad, thankfully, mostly just some scrapes and bruises. She was in much better shape than him.

    "Gah! Somebody kill me!"

    Or him.

    Both of them turned to the voice in what Nick was certain was the bathroom. At least he hoped it was, or someone was going to have a horrible time cleaning that up.

    "You sure he''s fine?" Nick asked, before launching into a coughing fit. Damn his throat was parched. And sore. Probably from the fetish play Mohji tried to get him into. Nami grabbed a glass of water off the nightstand and helped him drink it.

    Turns out, Nami made a pretty good nurse. Now if only she had the outfit¡­

    "Yeah. He got himself poisoned by one of Buggy''s men named Cabaji. But as it turns out, the poison was just a really potent laxative," she explained with a sigh. That made Nick wince, suddenly glad he had to throw down with a furry instead. And that was something he never thought he''d say.

    "How are you feeling?" she asked in a surprisingly caring tone.

    "Like I was stabbed by a psychotic clown. What about you? Seems like you had some trouble yourself," Nick responded, giving a once over to indicate her injuries. And then giving her another one for the hell of it.

    "I''m fine. Just a few bumps and bruises. No biggie. Besides, I''m not the one who''s been in bed for a day," she said.

    "What can I say? I need my beauty sleep," he responded. She rolled her eyes, but he could see the smile on her face. She couldn''t hide it from him.

    "So, mind telling me what happened? Seems like I missed a few things," he asked. She nodded and tried to make herself more comfortable.

    "Well let''s see. After you and I parted ways¡­"

    Her story took awhile, long enough that an old woman named Michi came in to change his bandages. He much preferred nurse Nami, but the evil old crow wouldn''t let her help.

    Nami then asked about what happened to him, and he explained his heroism in great detail. He may have embellished a thing or two, but who cares. It was close enough.

    It was just past midday when the stories were over. Nick was irritated about everything he missed. It sounded like an awesome fight. It also sounded nothing like the original.

    Seems like he didn''t have to wait long to see the ripple effects of him being there. Now he just had to ride the wave.

    It was about that time Nick would meet the protagonist of the story. None other than Monkey D. Luffy. He ran inside with a big smile on his face, holding his hat to his head. He looked around the room, before his eyes landed on Nick.

    "You''re awake!" he shouted and bounded up to them. Nami rolled her eyes at his antics and chastised him for being so loud. Not that it mattered with what was going on in the bathroom.

    "Hey, I''m Luffy! Want to join my crew?" he asked. Nick just stared at him, eyes wide. Did he really just ask that? Or was he hearing things. But Luffy seemed serious, waiting for his answer.

    "Hey, don''t you try to poach my lackey! He belongs to me," said Nami, giving Luffy a glare. Nick felt like he was shot with cupid''s arrow. The pain in his body began to leave him, ascending into the heavens above¡­

    "And he''s not going anywhere until he pays me back everything he owes!"

    ¡­And came crashing right back down, sending him spiraling into the depth of the underworld. Damn it, he should have known. Of course she was more interested in collecting her debt. Why would he think otherwise?

    Nick rolled over and covered his head with the blanket, a cloud of depression casting a deep dark shadow over him. Nami and Luffy looked confused at this, with Nami tentatively reaching out a hand.

    "Um, Nick?"

    But he refused to respond.

    Luffy watched with a confused look as Nami continued to try and get Nick to respond. What was wrong? Did he need some meat? That always cheered him up. Maybe he should go and find some?

    He originally came here to check up on Zoro, but he seemed fine.

    "Ahh! When will it end!?"

    ¡­Sort of.

    "Come on Nick, answer me!"

    He continued to watch his crew for a minute, because they were his crew. After all, if Nick belonged to Nami, and Nami was part of his crew, that made Nick part of his crew as well. Nodding his head at the logic, he proceeded to leave the room. Beginning an epic quest to find some meat.

    ***Line Break***

    Nick stared up at the ceiling, alone with his thoughts. Which was something he should never be alone with. His mind was a dark and mysterious place, with terrible monsters lurking around every corner.

    Nami left just a little while ago to help with the party preparations, claiming she would come and get him before it started. Apparently, the town was so thankful they wanted to show them their appreciation. Which was nice, but it wasn''t like he could enjoy it to its fullest, not with his injuries. But he could at least partake in some delectable delicacies.

    He was hungry, so what?

    But that was still a few hours away, and left him some time to think about things. Namely, what he wanted to do going forward. This experience really opened his eyes to the reality of the situation.

    He was in another world. And he almost died.

    Before all this he was just going with the flow, enjoying the sights and sounds of Nami. But then everything changed when a clown stabbed him a few times. Technically it was his crew that stabbed him, but it was on his orders.

    The point is, he almost died. On the second island in the show to an IT reject. What would happen the next time? Will he be able to make it out alive a second time?

    It wasn''t like he needed to go with Luffy on his adventure. Chances are, he would just make things worse anyway. From what Nami told him, it sounded like Buggy might have used Haki. That was way too early for that to make an appearance. That was timeskip level shit.

    And what reason did he have to join? Everyone else had a goal to strive for, something that pushed them forward.

    Luffy wanted to be King of the Pirates.

    Zoro wanted to be the world''s greatest swordsman.

    Nami wanted to draw a map of the whole world.

    Usopp wanted to stop being such a pussy.

    Sanji wanted to find the All Blue.

    Each of them had something that gave them purpose. Gave their journey meaning. But what did he have? What reason could Nick give to wanting to join?

    Besides putting a baby in Nami.

    And while that was a goal worth dying for, he wasn''t sure it was enough to challenge the whole world. He saw clips of that Nico Robin shit. Usopp set a flag on fire and they declared war on the world.

    What reason could he give to stand up to the world? He could just as easily fuck off to a random island, like the one he was on right now, and live happily ever after. He could do that¡­

    Couldn''t he?

    The thought left a bitter taste in his mouth. It tasted like failure and the sweat of a beta male. He has the chance to go on the greatest adventure ever told, could he really walk away from that?

    No, no he couldn''t. He''s watched anime almost his entire life, at least until daddy dearest told him to grow up. But he could still remember the journeys. The adventures!

    Dragon Ball Z.

    Inuyasha.

    Bleach.

    Naruto.

    Hell, even Pok¨¦mon!

    Those stories and those characters shaped his view on the world. Made him into the person he is now. The ones to blame for his personality. And it wasn''t just them either.

    Lord of the Rings.

    Star Wars.

    Harry Potter.

    All moments in history etched into his very soul. And with it, a burning desire for adventure. He could hear it calling, and it was up to him whether to answer it or not. He could pick up that phone, or let it ring. The choice was his and his alone.

    But that wasn''t all. His longing for adventure was only part of the reason. A big part admittedly, but still only one. The other part was to find the reason why.

    Why was he here? Who or what brought him here? All he could remember through his drunken haze was a swirling black vortex filled with vomit. The answers had to be out there somewhere, he just needed to be brave enough to find them. Even if it took him to the ends of the world, or a new one entirely.

    Third time''s the charm after all.

    There was also the conundrum of him knowing the future and whether he should reveal it or not. He doubted Luffy would want to know, as it would spoil the journey, but the others might feel differently.

    But if he does say something, and that causes a worse result¡­ For example, telling them about Crocodile''s weakness to water. If Luffy goes into that first battle knowing that, Crocodile might not be so cocky and just kill him outright to prevent the secret from spreading.

    Or Luffy could beat him early. There was no way of knowing. Hell, he didn''t even know if there would be a first battle, or any battle at all. Things weren''t exactly the same after all.

    Once Nick found out it was Zoro in the other room, he quickly found the man''s swords leaning against the wall. There were three, like he suspected, but there was something different as well. Zoro had three black swords. He was missing the Waddle Itchy Monkey¡­

    Ok, Nick couldn''t remember the name exactly, and he was pretty sure that wasn''t it, but he did remember one of his swords was white. That means he didn''t have that sword.

    Something had changed. Maybe his sensei didn''t give it to him, or maybe he lost it, there was no way of knowing without asking, and that would bring up even more questions.

    Like how did he know about that sword in the first place? Nick had no good answer for that. Maybe he could play up being a clairvoyant? Doubtful, but it could work.

    No, it was best to discover the reason naturally. But it did emphasize that this story wasn''t the same one he knew, and any future knowledge he might have could prove false. Bad information was worse than no information.

    At the same time, what about Ace? Nick may not have seen the whole arc, but he did know about the man''s death. It was pretty big news at the time, so it wasn''t hard to stumble upon.

    And then there was Luffy''s other brother, Socko. Wait, that didn''t sound right either. Whatever, the point is, he was supposed to have another one. One who supposedly died years ago, but turned out to have amnesia or something.

    That was pretty big news as well.

    For all Nick knew, Ace was already dead, and Socko was the pirate. He just didn''t know. He wouldn''t find out until Alabasta.

    Perhaps he should put it on hold until then. Until he knew if Ace was alive and Sabo was dead. He didn''t want to give them false hope, but still¡­

    Could Luffy forgive him if he knew one brother was still alive and the other was going to die, and did nothing about either? No, he likely wouldn''t. Luffy might be pretty carefree, but something like that would shatter any and all trust.

    Alabasta, that was the time. Until then, he would gather as much information as he could.

    Well, guess that means he was planning to go with them. He may not know what the world had in store for him, but he would face it head on.

    His goals were as follows:

    -Go on the world''s biggest adventure and conquer everything the world throws at him.

    -Find out why he was brought here.

    -Put a baby in Nami.

    -Don''t fuck up!

    Yeah, that was a pretty good list, though not necessarily in the right order. He would almost certainly add to it as time continued, but for now, he had a clear motive moving forward.

    Looking out the window at the setting sun, Nick heard cheering and saw flickering lights coming from a bonfire. Seems like the party is in full swing. Wasn''t Nami supposed to come and get him? Maybe she forgot?

    Well, he was just a bank to her. Nothing more than a walking ATM, spewing Beris out of his ass. He shouldn''t have expected her to actually come for him.

    Before he could delve deeper into his depression, he heard the sound of approaching footsteps. After a moment, the door opened to reveal the stunning visage of none other than Nami walking into the room.

    "Hey, sorry I''m late. Michi caught me and she just had to introduce me to her grandson. Took me a little while to escape. Anyway, you ready to go?" she asked, holding out her hand.

    Nick stared at her for a second before a grin split his face. Maybe he wasn''t just a bank to her after all. He wasn''t sure what exactly he was, and for the time being it didn''t matter. What mattered right now was just enjoying the moment for what it was.

    He grabbed her hand and together, they partied and danced the night away.

 Chapter 12

    Nick groaned as he placed the last of the supplies into their little boat. He stretched his back, trying to get the kinks out. He was tired from the party last night, everyone having stayed up until the crack of dawn, dancing, drinking, and filling their bellies full.

    Something that was harder for some. Seriously, Luffy looked like he weighed about 400 pounds after all the food he ate. It was as impressive as it was disgusting.

    Zoro, meanwhile, mostly drank booze. Apparently his poor stomach wasn''t feeling up to a feast. Not that Nick could blame him, considering the pleas for death he made while on the toilet. But why he opted to drink what was essentially more poison instead, baffled Nick.

    Nami also drank heavily, enough to force Nick to dance with her. He probably shouldn''t have, considering his injuries, but it was worth busting the stitches a few times to be up close and personal with the jiggle.

    And when Nami got to dancing, boy did they jiggle. Just thinking about it brought a smile to his face. A pervy smile, but a smile nonetheless.

    It was nearly midday now, and everyone seemed eager to leave. Luffy to continue his adventure, Zoro to continue his goal, Nami to get away from Michi asking her to marry her grandson, and Nick, who couldn''t wait to head to the next village and get a proper ship.

    The Going Merry.

    He knew they lost it at some point, having seen the image of their new ship, but Merry was the one he grew up with, and he couldn''t wait to set sail on her.

    That''s also when they truly became pirates, with their own flag. Everything before then was basically just the prologue. It was almost time for the real story to begin.

    Who was it they faced there again? Clueless Door? No that wasn''t it. Why did Nick have to be so bad with names? Well, he was sure he''d remember it when he saw him. That butler fucker.

    That would also be when they meet Usopp, the worst liar this side of the Grand Line. Nick remembered some of the lies he told, and couldn''t believe any one would believe them. But of course, Luffy did, the gullible little idiot.

    "Is that everything?" asked a voice to his left. Turning to see who it was, he was greeted to the tantalizing visage of none other than Nami. She stood there in another new outfit. Now she was wearing a low cut, white shirt that showed part of her slender stomach, along with a short, orange, breezy skirt that showed off dem legs.

    "Yeah, I think so. Zoro''s bringing up the last of it now. You look good by the way," he told her. She gave him a little smile, "Thanks. A few of the girls in town gave me some clothes for the road."

    Those girls were saints, at least to Nick. After all, the more outfits Nami has to wear, the more Nick could appreciate just how fine she was. Variety is the spice of life.

    They could see the last two members of their motley crew make their way towards them. Luffy was munching on a bone, and Zoro was hefting a large sack over his shoulder. Behind them was Boodle, Michi, and Chouchou there to see them off.

    "Alright, that''s everything," said Zoro, heaving the sack into their boat. Luffy and him would be taking their own little dinghy while Nami and Nick had their own, much roomier ride. They would be tied together so they wouldn''t get separated.

    Sometimes, crime does pay. Wait, was it still a crime if you stole from criminals?

    Nami was sure to say no. That was her modus operandi after all, and she didn''t consider herself a criminal. A thief for sure, but not a criminal. Nick wasn''t so sure, but figured it wasn''t worth arguing over.

    Although, Nami was pretty hot when she was mad. So maybe¡­

    No, it wasn''t worth the headache. Better to just appreciate it as it came naturally. Like a wild animal.

    "So this is it. Time to say goodbye. I can''t thank you all enough for what you''ve done for us and our town," said Boodle, tears forming in his eyes.

    "No problem. Besides, you fed us so we''re even," smiled Luffy. Zoro gave a snort at that, but said nothing.

    Chouchou let out a bark, his tail wagging back and forth. He seemed to be doing good, his injuries not slowing him down at all.

    "Yeah, you too," Luffy said to him.

    "Since when can you speak dog?" asked Nami.

    "Huh, what do you mean?" Luffy asked. He wasn''t sure what she was talking about, he couldn''t speak dog. He just had a feeling of what Chouchou meant.

    Nami rolled her eyes at Luffy as Michi approached, "Are you sure you don''t want to stay? My grandson-"

    "No, sorry, we have to go. Lot''s to do," Nami interrupted, her eye twitching. She liked Michi, she really did, but she had no interest in her grandson. How many times did she have to tell her that?

    "Fine, fine, break an old woman''s heart why don''t you," Michi said, laying on the guilt. Though she was mostly joking, she was in fact sad to see them go. Especially Nami. Nick knew the feeling, but somehow doubted Michi would appreciate the sight of Nami leaving as much as he did.

    "Promise you''ll take care," she continued.

    Nami gave her a smile, "Promise." It was nice to have someone be concerned for her. The only person he''s had for a long time show any worry at all was her sister Nojiko. It was better than nothing, but she still missed Genzo and the others in Cocoyashi.

    Soon. She almost had enough. Just a little more, and everyone would be free. The long nightmare was almost over, and everyone could finally wake up.

    "And you young man," she turned her attention to Nick, who looked a bit nervous at the attention, much to everyone''s amusement. "You better not do anything to reopen those wounds again. Honestly, I had to put you back together 5 times last night. Five! What''s wrong with kids these days?"

    She just didn''t understand Nick''s dilemma. You see, drunk Nami liked to spin and twirl, which caused some interesting things to happen with her chest. At that point it was out of his hands, there was nothing he could do.

    "I''ll try my best," he told her. What he didn''t say was what his best was. She huffed but said nothing more. He should be fine for a white anyway. They would be sailing on a small boat, the chances of him hurting himself was fairly slim.

    Then again, it wasn''t hard for him to get distracted, even on a small boat. In fact, that might have made it even easier. There would be nowhere to escape the hypnotic powers of Nami''s body. He would be in its thrall, with no hope of rescue.

    Not that he''d want to be rescued in the first place.

    They then boarded the ship and made ready to depart. As they untied the ship and began to cast off, the whole town seemed to appear out of thin air, cheering for the group.

    "Thank you so much!"

    "We won''t ever forget you!"

    "Stay safe!"

    Luffy smiled and waved his arms enthusiastically, "See you!" Nami waved with her own smile, and Nick gave them a grin.

    "You know, this is the second town that saw us off after saving them. Are you really a pirate?" questioned Zoro, with a sarcastic quip to his voice. The others turned to him, as Luffy let out a laugh.

    "Being a pirate just means being free," he started, taking off his hat and staring at it, a million emotions crossing his face as he did so. "So as long as I stick to that belief, I don''t care if people call me a good pirate or a bad pirate. I''ll live the way I want, with no regrets."

    It was surprisingly eloquent, considering who it was coming from, but the others couldn''t help but feel a bit inspired by it. Though Nami was in disbelief. Luffy was definitely different from other pirates.

    "So then, what does being King of the Pirates mean to you?" Nick asked. Luffy gave him a look before placing the hat back on his head, a grin etched onto his face. He never grew tired of talking about his dream.

    "He''s the freest of them all."

    That caused a similar grin to appear on Zoro''s face, even as he turned away to gaze at the ocean. Nami shook her head in disbelief, unable to comprehend the pirate in front of her. It was antithetical to everything she knew about pirates.

    And Nick was relieved. It seems that was the same at least.

    "Hey you kids!" shouted a voice. They turned to see who it was, and were greeted to the sight of Boodle, hands creating a tunnel over his mouth to try and sound louder.

    "Come back someday, you hear! The town will be a hundred times better the next time you see it!"

    "You got it, old guy!" shouted Luffy. They were all smiles as they finally left the town.

    "So, Miss Navigator, where are we headed?" asked Zoro, with a hint of condescension. Luffy stopped waxing at the townsfolk and turned around, also eager to know their next destination.

    Nami rolled her eyes at his attitude, "The next closest town is Syrup Village, in the Gecko Islands. It''s known for its shipbuilding and of course, its syrup. We should get there in about 3 days," she explained. Nick didn''t remember the ship building part, but then again, they never did expand on how Kaya''s parents became so wealthy. At least, not that he remembered.

    Luffy seemed excited by this. Or, more excited than usual. "Really? So we can get a ship there? A big one with 30 cannons and a fire breathing figurehead?"

    "With what money? Or do you plan to steal one?" asked Nami, more than a bit baffled by his desires. Wouldn''t a fire breathing figurehead pose a hazard of the burning variety?

    That seemed to stump him, as he adopted a thinking pose, arms crossed and head tilted to the side. But it wasn''t long until he gave up, "We''ll figure something out."

    Nami placed a hand on her head to try and stave off the coming headache. Zoro let out a laugh, watching in amusement, "You heard the Captain. Let''s go get a ship."

    Nami growled at them, ready to teach them a lesson about how to make proper plans and not just wing it, before a hand on her shoulder halted her. It was none other than Nick, who tried to give her a reassuring smile.

    Though, it was kind of ruined by the fact that he was holding in a laugh. "Come on. I''m sure everything will work itself out. Who knows, maybe we''ll save this town from pirates as well, and they''ll reward us with a ship."

    "Yeah right, like that would happen," she said back. That made Nick have to hold in the laugh even more. Never say never Nami.

    ***Line Break***

    Traveling by boat was a bit different than Nick was expecting. Sure he traveled for about a day not long ago, but that was different. He could hold it. Plus, there was a Nami to distract him, but she was inside the small interior of the boat.

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    Now, he had to poop, and there was nothing he could do about it. It was going to happen, one way or another.

    And the boat didn''t have a toilet, so he wasn''t sure about what to do. He didn''t want to ask Nami, that would be mortifying. He could ask Luffy, the guy wouldn''t judge him, but he likely wouldn''t be quiet about it either.

    That left a green haired swordsman. He should know plenty about shitting himself after spending a whole day on the toilet after being poisoned by laxatives. Luckily, he just woke up from a nap. Dude slept more than a cat. Nick slowly made his way over to him, being as silent as he could, so he didn''t alert the others.

    Luffy was trying to fish, though Nick had no idea where he got the pole from. It just kind of showed up. Must have been in the supplies Zoro bought.

    And with Nami inside the boat''s interior doing¡­ something, it gave him a golden opportunity to find out where he was supposed to poop.

    "Psst, Zoro," he whispered from the edge of the boat. Zoro, who was in his and Luffy''s vessel, turned his head to the sound, only to discover it was Nick.

    "Yeah? What do you want?" he asked. The two of them hadn''t spoken much, only having a brief discussion about training during the party, before Nick was dragged off by their navigator. Zoro wasn''t sure whether he should praise the man or pity him for gaining her affections.

    "You''ve been traveling the sea for a while haven''t you?" Nick questioned.

    Zoro raised a brow, "Yeah, what of it?"

    Nick looked around, a suspicious, borderline paranoid expression on his face, before he leaned in to whisper, "So, where''s a guy supposed to go number two? Do we pull the boat over or is there a bucket¡­" he trailed off.

    Zoro gave him a look of disbelief, "What the hell are you talking about?

    Nick made a shushing motion, trying to get Zoro to keep his voice down, "Shh!" he hissed at him. Looking around again, he let out a sigh of relief when no one seemed to look in their direction.

    "Listen, I need to poop," Nick tried explaining.

    "Then go already. Why are you telling me?" Zoro asked angrily. Did he look like the type of guy who wanted to know about these things? ''Cause if he did, he needed a new look.

    "Don''t you think I want to? But where do I go? There''s no toilet," Nick told him. What was so hard to understand? What didn''t Zoro get about this?

    "Then go over the side you moron!" he growled. That got Luffy''s attention, who turned to see what the commotion was. Nick gave him a jaunty wave, while Zoro just looked pissed. He shrugged and went back to fishing.

    "Seriously, that''s all you have to say?" Nick hissed, turning back to the swordsman in anger. Zoro just continued to glare at him, "What do you want from me?"

    "I want a solution that doesn''t have my ass dangling over the water."

    "Too bad. Either dangle or shit your pants. Just do it somewhere else."

    That was the end of that conversation. Nick walked to the other side of the boat, placing the room between him and the other to give him some privacy. This was it, now or never.

    He dropped his pants, and hopped up on the edge, booty all the way out. Now he just needed to be quiet, so the others wouldn''t hear. That''s all he needed to do.

    So of course, that was the one thing he couldn''t do. It was almost comical how loud it was, like a car backfire. He sat there, ass out, holding his breath, hoping for a miracle.

    But none came, he heard the door open, and Nami stepping out, "What was that noise?" she asked, looking at Luffy and Zoro. Luffy didn''t know, and was even looking around for the source. But Zoro¡­

    He knew.

    "I don''t know, but I think it came from over there," he said, gesturing to the other side of her boat. He was barely able to keep the massive smirk off his face, the dick.

    Nick heard Nami coming his way, and cursed Zoro for all he was worth. He knew damn well what he was doing. Nick would have his revenge someday, when Zoro least expected it.

    But for now, he has a Nami to worry about. He could hear her footsteps coming closer each and every second. Soon she would see him and his shame.

    He wanted to pull his pants up, but there was the problem of, uh, residue left behind, and he didn''t have any toilet paper. These were his only pair of pants, and he wasn''t going to ruin them like this. If he shit himself in battle, fine, but not like this.

    So he sat there, drawing on whatever dignity he could muster, and waited. Soon enough, Nami came waltzing into view, "Hey Nick, did you hear some¡­ thing¡­" she trailed off after getting a good look at him.

    Oh look! Luffy was with her too, isn''t that great? They stood there in silence for a moment, or at least Nami and Luffy did. Nick sat there, nonchalant as can be, with his ass facing the sea.

    "Um, so¡­ You mind passing me the toilet paper," Nick said after several long, silent moments. Luffy started laughing, and he could hear Zoro doing the same. Assholes, the both of them. Nami, however¡­

    "..."

    Didn''t say a word, just stared with a blank, dead look on her face. "Can we pretend this never happened?" Nick asked.

    The short answer is no.

    ***Line Break***

    "So, what do you guys think?" Nick asked, twirling around and posing with his Marine coat. The rest of the crew just gave him blank looks in return.

    "Think about what? Why are you dressed like a Marine?" asked Zoro. It was the second day of the trip, and Nick found his pilfered coat after looking through their supplies. He decided to get a different opinion than Nami''s about how it looked. After all, there was no way Luffy and Zoro wouldn''t think it was awesome.

    "I took it as restitution for wrongful imprisonment while at Shells Town," Nick responded, with his hands on his hips, and pout on his face. The lackluster response wasn''t what he was expecting.

    "You were in Shells Town too?" asked Luffy, his eyes wide at the revelation. Even Zoro seemed surprised.

    "Yup, locked up in the deepest part of their dungeon for crimes both imagined and exaggerated. They were planning to execute me after some other dude, but Nami broke me out before that could happen," Nick responded.

    Zoro and Luffy looked contemplative as they turned their attention to Nami. "Why are you looking at me like that?" she asked.

    "Just surprised you saved someone," commented Zoro, with Luffy nodding along. Nami gave them both a glare, "And what''s that supposed to mean, huh?"

    Nick could see a fight was about to break out, so decided to intervene, raising his placatingly, "Alright, let''s calm down. The important thing is I''m free, more or less."

    The other two men raised an eyebrow, "More or less? What''s that mean?" asked Luffy. He looked pretty free to him.

    "I mean, she didn''t save me for free¡­" Nick said.

    "That makes more sense," said Zoro, as Luffy tilted his head in confusion, still not getting it.

    "So, how much does he owe you?" asked Zoro.

    Nami huffed, not liking being under their scrutiny, "Just a million, and that''s a real steal. If you could have smelled him or heard his singing, you would have left him to rot."

    "Oh come on, my singing wasn''t that bad," Nick tried to say, but one look from Nami silenced him. Come on, he received a B in high school choir, it couldn''t be that bad he would owe someone a million Beris as compensation. Could it?

    Come to think of it, he was told to lip sync¡­

    "It was the worst thing I''ve ever heard. For the first time in my life, I envied the deaf," Nami stated, a flat look on her face. Nick could only pout as the other two snickered at him.

    "You know, come to think of it, the guards there did mention a prisoner who was so terrible that guarding him was a punishment. Guess that was you," Zoro commented, which now had Nami snickering as well.

    "Guess you can''t be the crew''s musician then," said Luffy. Nick''s eye twitched as they continued to mock him, Zoro and Nami laughing even harder. He didn''t mind Nami laughing, as that caused her chest to move in wonderful new ways, he just wished it wasn''t at his expense.

    Well, at least he got something out of it.

    "Haha, very funny. That''s enough making fun of Nick for one day. Back to the original topic, the coat?" Nick said, as they finally calmed down, Nami wiping a tear from her eye.

    "Why are you so obsessed with that thing?" asked Zoro, raising an eyebrow.

    "Because Nami doesn''t understand how cool it looks. The way it flutters in the wind, and frames the body. I thought you two would understand," Nick said, trying to show off the coolness of his stolen apparel.

    The three of them gave him flat looks, but it was Luffy who said something, "I don''t think a pirate should look like a Marine. It''s weird."

    "What? But I thought being a pirate meant being free?" Nick questioned, crossing his arms, giving Luffy the stink eye.

    "...Not that free," he said, causing the other two to start snickering again. The twitch was back in Nick''s eye, but he would show them.

    "Fine, if that''s the way you feel, then I guess I have no choice¡­" Nick said, before taking a big gulp of air. The other looked on in confusion, before turning into horror. Nick started to sing.

    "I can''t stop this feeling! Deep inside of me!"

    "Ahh!"

    "Ahh!"

    "Ahh!"

    ***Line Break***

    Nami was checking their heading, eyes glancing from a compass to the endless ocean in front of her. She read the wind as it flowed into her face, making small adjustments to their course based on the signals. There was a storm coming, but they should be able to avoid it.

    But then a sound reached her ears. It was something that was becoming somewhat familiar as of late. It was the sound of Zoro and Nick arguing about something. She rolled her eyes, but decided to go and see what it was about this time. Not like she had anything better to do.

    "I''m telling you you''re wrong," she heard Nick say.

    "Whatever, you just have no taste," she heard Zoro respond.

    Nami saw Nick leaning over the railing with Zoro leaning back in his dinghy, arms crossed. Both of them held determined looks in their eyes, neither willing to back down from whatever they were arguing about.

    "What''s got you two so loud this time?" Nami asked as she approached, cocking her hips. Which Nick noted were phenomenal.

    "Oh hey Nami," he greeted, not at all staring. Zoro just made a tsk sound but didn''t comment further.

    "We were just having a friendly discussion about which drink is the best. I say whiskey, but cabbage patch here says sake," Nick explained.

    "What did you just call me?" Zoro questioned with a growl.

    "I see," Nami said.

    "What about you?" Nick asked, completely ignoring Zoro, much to his consternation

    "Absinthe," she responded simply. Both Zor and Nick''s eyes widened at that.

    "Damn¡­" muttered Zoro.

    "Holy¡­" trailed Nick.

    Nami just gave them both a victorious smirk, like she just won something. The two losers turned to look at each other in disbelief. That''s when Nick remembered something about Nami winning a drinking contest in some town. Also she drank a whole lot during the party the other day, more than even Zoro, come to think of it.

    He found it kind of hot.

    That''s when he noticed the last member of their little party, none other than Monkey D. Luffy himself, walking around the corner of his and Nami''s boat. Weird, what was he doing over there, and when did he get there?

    Probably not important. "Hey Luffy!" he shouted. Luffy stopped in his tracks and looked around panicked for a second, before his eyes settled on Nick. He made his way over with a nervous look on his face.

    "Yeah? What''s up?" he asked.

    "We were talking about everyone''s favorite drinks. What''s yours?" Nick questioned. Luffy gained a look of relief on his face.

    "Apple juice," he said plainly. Everyone stared at him and blinked a couple times, before bursting out laughing.

    "Hey, what''s so funny!?" Luffy shouted angrily. What was wrong with apple juice?

    "T-the king of the pirates¡­ drinking apple juice¡­" Nick wheezed. Zoro and Nami were laughing for similar reasons.

    "Couldn''t you at least make it hard cider?" asked Zoro. Luffy gained a look of disgust on his face, "Ew, no way. Then it would taste all yucky."

    That caused a new round of laughter from the three.

    Finally they calmed down, Nick being the one to wipe a tear from his eye this time. "Ooh boy, I needed that. Alright, how about this, favorite food?" Nick asked. They each gained a look of contemplation on their faces.

    "Fish and white rice. But anything that pairs well with sake is fine with me," said Zoro. Nick rolled his eyes, "Dude, give it a rest with the sake already."

    "What was that!?"

    "As for me," Nick said, ignoring Zoro once again, "Pizza, hands down. Nothing better. What about you Nami?"

    "Hm, well tangerines are my favorite, but after that¡­" she started, before moving her finger to her lip, considering what she would say, before dragging it down her bottom lip in a very suggestive way, staring right at Nick, "A big, thick piece of steak."

    Nick shivered. Damn this woman, she knew exactly what she was doing to him. That cocky smirk said it all. "You better stop with that sexy talk before you start something you can''t finish," Nick said, with Nami giving him a coy smile in return.

    "Get a room," said Zoro, not at all interested in their flirting. Nick and Nami gained a bit of a red hue on their faces at the suggestion.

    "Oh I plan on it green bean, someday," Nick muttered to himself, then turned his attention to Luffy once more. "What about you Captain?"

    "Me? Hmm, well they all tasted pretty good¡­" he said, thinking really hard about it. But something he said struck Nick as weird, and he could see Nami caught it too.

    "Luffy, what do you mean it tasted good? Did you eat all our food?" Nick asked. Luffy''s eyes widened to the size of dinner plates, before looking away and whistling.

    Poorly.

    "I don''t know what you''re talking about," he asserted, but the sweat dripping down his face said otherwise. The other three shared a look, before their eyes narrowed in suspicion.

    "Really? Then what''s that on your face?" asked Nami.

    Luffy started panicking even more, "Oh man, I thought I got it all!" he shouted before wiping imaginary food from his face.

    "Got you! There wasn''t anything there!"

    "Wah! You tricked me!"

    Zoro and Nick could only stare as Nami whacked a big lump into his head. One of them couldn''t believe he forgot he needed to guard the food. Rookie mistake. Well, at least their destination wasn''t too far off.

    And on the plus side, if he didn''t eat anything, he wouldn''t have to poop off the side of the boat anymore.

    ***Line Break***

    Nami stood on the bow of the boat, looking through her spyglass, trying to ignore her grumbling stomach as best she could. She couldn''t believe that little rubber idiot at all the food on their second day!

    Actually, she could believe it, and felt even stupider for not considering the possibility. She wouldn''t make that mistake again.

    A blurry image from her telescope distracted her from her murderous thoughts. Slowly, the image came into focus, and to her relief, it was an island. Finally, they were here.

    "Hey, we''re here!" Nami shouted, catching everyone''s attention. They made their way to the front of their respective boats, which was far easier for two of them. Nick came to a stop beside the beautiful navigator.

    "I don''t see anything. Are you sure we''re here?" asked Luffy. Nami rolled her eyes, "Of course I am. Who do you think you''re talking to? Just give it a minute, and you''ll see."

    So they did, and sure enough, after a minute or two, they could finally make out an island. "Woah, I can see it! Hey Nami, what''s this place called again?" asked Luffy.

    "It''s the Gecko Islands, and our destination is Syrup Village, which is on the third island in the archipelago," she answered. Luffy looked more excited than ever, "Syrup Village huh? Shishishishi, I can''t wait!"

    His enthusiasm was almost contagious, as everyone gained an excited look. Maybe that was because everyone was hungry and they were tired of hearing the one who ate all the food complain about it, saying, "I''m hungry," or "Are we there yet?"

    Little jerk.

    But as they made their approach, Nick couldn''t help but wonder what adventure was in store for him this time. Would things be the same, or drastically different from what he remembers? Well, only one way to find out!

 Chapter 13

    The sound of construction could be heard throughout the area. Several large, burly men hafted mighty slabs of wood over their shoulders, carrying them to where they needed to go.

    Others sawed and sanded the wood, getting them ready to be placed in their final destination. Normally, the sound of laughter and good cheer could be heard as they worked, building boats of various sizes to be sold.

    But recently, there has been little cause for merriment. All the work they were doing was to repair the damage already done. The ships had been built and were ready for sale, but for about a month now, someone has been damaging them.

    Nobody knew who it was and it was causing the no end of grief to the village. No one felt it more than the young Kaya. She was the owner of the shipyards, having inherited it from her deceased parents. Or to be more precise, she will inherit it as soon as she turns 18.

    An event that was rapidly approaching. The stress of the whole thing has rendered her in even poorer health than usual, and she hasn''t left her mansion even once since the attacks began.

    Her only respite was her friend Usopp, who came around as often as he could to regale her with fantastical tales. She never cared if they were true or not, and to be honest, she knew they weren''t. She only cared that her friend took the time to tell them, and they always brought a smile to her face.

    During those times, for just a few moments, she could forget all her worries and troubles, her poor health, and the death of her parents. For that short time, she was just Kaya, and he was just Usopp, two friends spending time together.

    Most of the village thought they would end up as a couple, even though a few disagreed with that notion. Usopp had a reputation, you see, one for lying. Almost everyday, he would run through the village, shouting about pirates. But everyday, that turned out to be false.

    Most of them were sick of it, while some found it amusing. But whichever side they were on, didn''t really matter. No one had heard his lies for nearly a month now. Not since the attacks began.

    He was simply too busy to be spreading his tall tales across the village. Even now, he was finishing up some repairs on top of a mast, hammering nails into the wood to keep it steady.

    Usopp let out a sigh, whipping the sweat from his brow. He inspected his work, and when he was satisfied, nodded his head in pride. He wasn''t the best when it came to ship repairs, but he''s been getting better with all the practice he''s been getting in lately.

    Something he wasn''t particularly grateful for. Sure he enjoyed increasing his skills and being of use to his friend, not to mention the paycheck, but the whole reason for it made him frown.

    Looking around at the state of disrepair, he clenched the hammer in anger. Someone had the nerve to destroy all the hard work people put into making these beautiful ships, and no one knew why. Not to mention the stress it was causing his friend.

    That was what was most unforgivable.

    Not to mention due to how busy he''s been with the repairs, he hasn''t been able to see her in over a week. It seems the closer they got to her birthday, the more frequent the attacks became.

    Usopp has tried to stake out the ships during the night, but he''s never been able to catch them. Hell, he''s ever even seen them. One minute everything was fine, and the next, everything was on fire.

    Whoever they were, they were good. So good, even the Great Usopp couldn''t catch them. But they had to do something, this couldn''t go on. Kaya''s health seemed to be getting worse, and Usopp was worried that if it continued on for much longer¡­

    He shook his head. Those thoughts were better left unthought. No, much better to think of more pleasant things. Like that time he snuck into her room just as she was exiting the bath, and her towel dropped.

    Sure he received the beating of his life as she pummeled him with anything within reach, but it was worth it. He did make sure not to come around that time anymore, just in case. As much as he enjoyed seeing her in a state of undress, he didn''t want her to think he was a pervert.

    Although, if she could see the face he was making as he remembered it, she would definitely call him a pervert.

    "Captain!" shouted a voice from below. Usopp was so lost in thought that the sound startled him badly enough for him to lose his balance. He tried to stay on the mast, but it was no good. No matter how much he flailed his arms, his fall was inevitable.

    "Ah!" he screamed as he plummeted down, landing in a painful heap. He groaned as he lay there, looking at the pretty stars as they danced around his head.

    "You ok Captain!?" shouted the voice again. Usopp shook the stars away from his vision, and forced himself to his feet. He walked over to the railing to see just who it was that caused him to fall.

    It was a young boy with a round face and square glasses. He was wearing a bright yellow shirt with an even brighter blue vest over it and brown shorts. On his waist was a mustard colored sash. But his most distinctive feature was his hair. Short and brown, with a tuft sticking out of the top making him look just like an¡­

    "Onion, is that you? What are you doing here?" asked Usopp. It wasn''t that unusual for him or his friends to come see him at work. Or at any time really. But people were far more on edge since the attacks began, and his parents rarely let him leave the house unaccompanied.

    He must have snuck out then. Usopp was so proud of him.

    "I saw them! The pirates responsible for everything! They''re back!" he shouted. Usopp''s eyes widened. He wasn''t serious was he? He had to be lying. There was no way they''d just show up in the middle of the day.

    Not that he would lie at a time like this. Even Usopp himself hasn''t told a fib in weeks. Honestly, he was starting to have withdrawals.

    But judging by his face, it wasn''t a lie. So if he was telling the truth, then this was his big chance. He could take them down, prove himself to everyone, especially Kaya. But could he do it?

    No, that didn''t matter. Would he? That was the only question he needed to answer. It was also a much more difficult question. He could lie to himself and convince himself he could beat whoever was responsible, but would he truly even be able to try, that was the real question.

    If it was for Kaya¡­ Yes, he would.

    Swallowing the lump in his throat, he steeled his resolve. What little he had at any rate. "W-where are they!?" he asked. No his voice did not crack, the question was asked with resounding confidence. Whoever says different is an even bigger liar than he is.

    "Wow, the Captain is so brave!" thought poor, naive little Onion. Thanks to the railing of the ship, he wasn''t able to see his brave Captain''s knees wobbling uncontrollably.

    The two of them left the shipyard, Onion leading his Captain to where he saw the pirates. The two of them snuck toward the cliff, crawling on their bellies and hiding in some shrubs.

    They could see the small ships, and Usopp felt a bit of relief at the sight. He was expecting a massive ship with hundreds of snarling pirates ready to ransack the village. From this distance, he couldn''t make out the Jolly Roger, so he took out his spyglass to get a better look.

    He adjusted the lens until it came into focus, and when he did, he nearly crapped himself. He recognized that symbol. It was none other than the Buggy Pirates. But what were they doing here? What reason could they possibly have to attack the shipyards like they have been? If the rumors about the clown were true, that he was immortal, then he should have been able to easily take whatever he wanted.

    There had to be something else, something he couldn''t see. But what? No matter how much he thought, he couldn''t come up with an answer, and driving himself nuts trying to think of one wasn''t helping. He needed more information, the puzzle pieces just weren''t fitting right.

    Looking down, he took in the crew. A young looking guy wearing a straw hat, a green haired guy that looked absolutely bored, a brown haired guy in a leather vest, and a stunningly beautiful, orange haired girl with some major boobage.

    Usopp did not zoom in on her chest. Those are more vicious rumors spread by the same asshole who claimed his voice cracked earlier. If Usopp ever found the guy, he would sue him for slander.

    "What do you see, Captain?" asked a nervous Onion. While he enjoyed playing pirate with his friends, this was the first time he''s ever seen a real one, and he was more afraid then he could ever remember being. The only thing he was scared more of than pirates was clowns.

    "Boobs¡­ Wait, I mean it looks like it''s Buggy the Clown," said Usopp with a slight quiver in his voice. No matter how much he tried, he just couldn''t keep it out entirely. Like his friend, he''s never actually dealt with real pirates before, only the pretend ones they fought in the woods.

    A choking sound made him turn toward his friend, who was now white as a sheet. If he was any paler people would confuse him for a corpse, or a vampire. That''s when Usopp remembered his friend was deathly afraid of clowns. Nobody knew why, he never said, only that it had something to do with his fourth birthday party.

    "Hey Onion! Snap out of it!" Usoop yelled, shaking his friend like a dog. That seemed to do the trick, but now his terror induced shock turned into panic. "C-captain! What are we going to do!? We don''t stand a chance against clowns!"

    Usopp stared at him for a moment, even as tears and snot fell down his friend''s face. That was the part he was worried about? The fact that they were clowns and not pirates? Usopp knew a thing or two about being afraid, but this took the cake.

    "Listen, it''s fine, there are only four of them and they''re not even dressed like clowns. They''re probably new recruits or something, so that means we can take them no problem," Usopp reassured him with far more confidence than he felt.

    If you spot this story on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.

    "Are you sure Captain?" Onion asked, his trembling calming down a bit. He was still scared, but as long as they weren''t dressed like clowns, he should be fine.

    "Of course! Who do you think I am? I''m the great Captain Usopp! I could take on a thousand clowns, no problem!" He boasted, as his friend stared at him with stars in his eyes. Made the lies all worth it.

    "Wow! Your amazing Captain!" Onion praised, as Usopp''s nose seemed to grow. Whether it was from the lie or the admiration, who could say.

    "Of course I am! By the way, where are the others?" he asked. He looked around but saw no sign of his loyal crew.

    "They went to get our secret weapon, while I went to get you," Onion said.

    "Oh, that makes sense," Usopp nodded. That was good, if they were bringing that then they really would have no problem defeating the pirates. And when they did, the whole town would praise him, and even that stupid butler would have to admit how amazing he was.

    Oh he could see it now¡­

    "Usopp, I offer you my sincere apologies. You are by far the better man between us. I weep at your sheer magnificence," said the butler. Usopp stood there, standing proudly on top of the defeated foes, having saved the island.

    He laughed loudly, "I''m glad you finally understand! All is forgiven, so long as you never forget who the best is!"

    "Of course Usopp, I thank you for your generosity," Klahadore sniveled, before slinking away. Usopp watched him go with a condescending grin on his face. All was right in the world.

    "You did it!"

    "We''re so proud of you!"

    "We love you Usopp!"

    Turning around, Usopp was greeted to the sight of the whole village, gathered for the sole purpose of congratulating him. They waved and cheered with great big smiles on their faces, a far cry from the usual angry ones they had when he woke them up at the crack of dawn screaming about pirates.

    So what else could he do but wave back with the biggest, cockiest smile he could muster. It really was only a matter of time until they recognized his greatness afterall, and he was kind enough to allow them to bask in it.

    "Usopp¡­" said a dainty voice behind him. Turning around once more, he saw the beautiful image of Kaya in a form fitting yellow sundress, staring at him with adoration in her eyes, along with another emotion he couldn''t recognize.

    "Kaya¡­" he whispered back. She gave him a smile that made his heart flutter. He suddenly felt a bit guilty for staring at that other girl''s boobs. But in his defense, they were amazing.

    Not as amazing as the girl''s in front of him but still pretty great.

    "You did it Usopp, you saved the town, and me. You''re the bravest person in the whole world," she complimented. His nose seemed to get a bit longer as he preened under her attention.

    "Of course I am! I''m the Great Usopp! I only needed one finger to beat those clowns," he laughed boisterously. Kaya seemed even more amazed by that, her hands clasping together in excitement.

    "Wow!" she gasped. Usopp had his eyes closed as he soaked in her admiration.

    "Um, Usopp¡­?" Kaya said. He opened his eyes to look at her. She was standing there, fidgeting nervously, eyes glancing up at him before darting back to the ground, a massive blush on her face.

    "Y-yeah? What is it?" he asked, gulping. For some reason his hands were getting sweaty, and he had to clench them into a fist to keep them from shaking.

    "I just wanted to thank you properly. So, um¡­ could you close your eyes?" she asked, an embarrassed smile on her face. Usopp''s heart felt like it was about to pop out of his chest and kick him in the balls.

    "Uh yeah! Right, of course I can! No problem at all, ehehehe¡­" he laughed nervously, before doing as she asked and closing his eyes. He heard her step forward and her floral perfume tickled his nose.

    "No peeking, ok?" she told him. Usopp nodded, too nervous to say anything, as he felt her hands grab his cheeks. He could feel her inching closer and closer, her breath hot enough to make him faint.

    He puckered his lips, readying himself to enter nirvana¡­

    When a sharp pain dragged him into hell.

    "Ah!" he screamed, in shock and agony. The pain was centered on his nose, where he could see a figure through the tears. It looked a lot like Onion resorting to cannibalism, and his nose was on the menu.

    He pulled back and Onion released him. Usopp rolled around on the floor, trying to ease the pain. "What was that for!?" he shouted.

    Onion returned the glare, "You were trying to kiss me! What''s wrong with you!?"

    Usopp stopped his flailing to look at Onion. Kiss him? What was he¡­ That''s when his daydream came rushing back. That''s right, he was about to get a reward from Kaya for saving the town.

    His face turned red at the implications. He coughed into his hand as he stood up, trying to regain what little dignity he could. He had to make something up, something believable.

    "Ehem, good job Onion, you passed with flying colors," he said, much to the child''s confusion.

    "Huh? Passed what?" he asked.

    "You passed your ''What to do when someone tries to kiss you and you don''t like them that way'' training. Congratulations, I always believed in you," Usopp said. The only sound that could be heard was the wind rustling through the trees.

    "You liar!" shouted Onion, pointing an accusing finger at him.

    Usopp returned the look, shouting, "How dare you! I give you this awesome, secret training and this is the thanks I get?"

    "Then why were your hands so sweaty, huh?" Onion asked, looking at his Captain with a suspicion.

    Sweaty hands? Usoop looked at his palms and found that they were indeed covered in sweat. He cleared his throat again, wiping the offending liquid from his palms, thereby erasing the evidence.

    "I don''t know what you''re talking about¡­"

    "I knew it! I bet you were thinking about Kaya again weren''t you! Admit it!"

    "I admit nothing!"

    The two of them had their argument interrupted by the sound of something approaching. They looked to see a large, tarp covered thing moving closer, wheels barely visible beneath the covering.

    On either side of the object was a boy, ones Usopp knew all too well. His face lit up as he saw them approach, bringing their secret weapon with them.

    "Oi, Carrot, Pepper, you guys made it! " Usopp cheered, waving at them as they came closer. Their eyes brightened as they saw the older boy waiting for them.

    Carrot was a young boy with shaggy, light purple hair covering his eyes. An orange beanie with a skull and bones on the front sat on his head, with a small tuft of hair poking out of the top. He was wearing black hoodie and dark orange pants, with a brown sash across his waist.

    Pepper was another young boy with dark green hair shaped like a bell pepper. He was wearing a lime colored shirt that also had a skull and crossbones on the front, along with dark blue pants and a teal sash.

    "Captain, you''re here!" yelled Pepper. He was slightly surprised by this, given that the older boy was a coward, but he guessed even cowards could be brave sometimes.

    "Of course I am! Was there any doubt?" Usopp said, as they came to a stop.

    Carrot and Pepper shared a look, before focusing their attention anywhere else but Usopp, "Nope, not at all."

    "You little liars! How dare you doubt your fearless leader!"

    "What about that time we tried to get some honey and you knocked the bees nest out of the tree and tripped me screaming, ''Every man for himself!'' while running away?" asked Carrot.

    "Well, uh¡­"

    "Or that time you used me as a human shield when we ran onto that rabid raccoon?" questioned Pepper.

    "I¡­ You see¡­ That was¡­"

    "And there was that one time-" started Onion, only to be interrupted by Usopp.

    "Ok, ok that''s enough! You just don''t understand tactics!" he shouted, passing the buck to them. "Besides, who rubbed the cream all over you to help with the itching from the bee stings, huh?" he asked Carrot.

    "You did Captain¡­" he confirmed.

    "And Pepper, who was it that held your hand when you were forced to get rabies shots?" Usopp asked.

    "My mom," he stated.

    That brought Usopp up short for a moment. "Right, because they wouldn''t let me in the room. But I was there, the whole time, in spirit."

    The three stared at him dubiously for a moment. It was true he was the cause of much of their pain and suffering, he did always try to make up for his cowardice. And honestly, they probably would have done the same thing in his shoes. Nobody wants to get stung by bees after all, or have their arm chewed on by a crazy raccoon. It was for that reason and that reason alone, they forgave him.

    "Anyway enough about that, where''s Akisu?" asked Usopp. He looked around the tarped object but was unable to find him.

    "Huh, that''s weird. He was right behind us a second ago," said Pepper. They looked around confused for a moment, but were unable to find him.

    "You don''t think he was kidnapped by the pirates do you?" asked Onion, on the verge of panic. Who knows what those clowns would do to him if they got a hold of him.

    "D-don''t be silly. The pirates haven''t landed yet, see," said Usopp pointing out to sea, where they saw that was indeed the case. But if it wasn''t them, then where was he?

    "What if they''re not the only ones and were only meant to be a distraction while the rest of their crew rounded up the children to sacrifice them to a dark god?" rambled Onion. The rest of them looked freaked out for a second, before a movement behind the tarp drew their attention.

    "W-what is that?" questioned Onion fearfully. The four of them gulped as they approached the large item. It continued to rustle and shake the tarp, and Usopp placed Pepper in front of him, "You go first, in case it''s another raccoon."

    "You jerk!" he yelled, turning around and kicking Usopp in the shin.

    "Ow!" he shouted, hopping up and down on one foot in pain. "What was that for!?"

    "For trying to use me as a meat shield again!"

    "It has to be you! After all, you can''t get rabies twice!"

    "Yes you can!"

    "Uh guys¡­" interrupted a nervous Carrot.

    "What!?" they shouted back. Carrot pointed to the tarp, which was now moving far more rapidly. Oh right, that¡­

    The three kids jumped behind Usopp, even as he shouted in protest. They began to push him forward even as he begged them to stop with tears in his eyes.

    "You can''t! I just came down with, ''don''t go near the spooky thing under the tarp'' disease. If I go near it, I''ll die!"

    But his lies fell on deaf ears, and they eventually came to a stop right in front of it, and the tarp gave a massive shudder, causing Usopp to shut his eyes and thrust his arms out in a protective manner.

    But nothing happened. Usopp slowly opened his eyes, staring at the thing in confusion, until the tarp suddenly flew upwards, causing Usopp to scream and fall backwards, landing on his ass.

    "Hey big bro! Whatcha doin'' down there?" asked a voice. A familiar voice. Looking up, Usopp immediately overcame his chronic fear of unknown tarp monsters.

    "Akisu, it''s you! Don''t scare me like that!" he yelled. The others shouted their agreement, as Akisu just looked on confused.

    Usopp sighed letting go of his anger. It wouldn''t do to dwell on it, especially when it was clear his little brother didn''t mean anything by it. Cause if he did, he would be laughing his head off right now.

    "What are you doing in there anyway?" questioned Usopp. That got a response from the young boy, as his face lit up before he jumped down to join them.

    Akisu was a small boy about the same age as Carrot, Onion, and Pepper. He wore a pair of overalls like Usopp, without the straps going over his shoulders, dangling down either side of his legs, and a white shirt that was covered in stains. His most noticeable piece of clothing was the orange and white beanie he wore that was slightly too big for his head.

    "I was just making sure this baby is in tip top shape," he said with a grin. That seemed to alleviate the others'' anger at being scared.

    "I see¡­ Good work," said Usopp, rubbing the top of his head.

    "Hey, quit it!" Akisu complained, but it was easy to see he enjoyed the attention, judging by the large grin on his face. The others laughed at the interaction.

    "Alright men, listen up!" Usopp said, bringing the four of them to attention. They looked at the older boy, everyone gaining a serious look.

    "In just a few moments, our home will be besieged by four vicious, bloodthirsty pirates," he said.

    "And clowns!" shouted Onion in terror. The others looked at him for a moment, before he sheepishly apologized for interrupting the Captain.

    "Apology accepted! But only if you bring the Captain a cookie. Preferably chocolate chip," commanded Usopp in a sly manner.

    "What!? That''s not fair!" shouted Onion, as the others snickered at him.

    "I''m the Captain, and the Captain demands apology cookies! Now where was I?" continued Usopp, as he turned to face away from them, ignoring Onion''s grumbling complaints.

    "Right! Our home is on the brink of destruction, and we are the only ones who can prevent such a tragedy. Therefore, it is up to us to defend this island with all we have. Are you with me!?" he shouted. The others yelled in agreement. Their bravery was almost enough to bring tears to his eyes.

    "Excellent! We will begin the defensive with Operation: Sneaky Bushes! And if that doesn''t scare them off, we will have no choice but to unleash our secret weapon, though we risk a great calamity by doing so."

    The four young boys all nodded with determined looks on their faces. They were scared, terrified even, but they would do what they had to to defend their home.

    Looking out at the sea, the small boats were almost there. They had less than 10 minutes before they would make land, and they had to prepare. It was now or never.

    "Alright men, let''s get ready! Though some of you may die, know this, I will keep your memory alive for as long as I live."

    "Why are we the ones who have to die!?" they all shouted.

    "Do not question your Captain!"

 Chapter 14

    The midday sun beat down on the small crew as they finally managed to make landfall. What should have been a relatively easy trip turned needlessly arduous due the actions of a certain gluttonous Captain.

    Nick jumped out of the ship and stretched, arms facing the sky. Damn did it feel good to be out of that tiny boat. Sailing lost most of its appeal when there was little leg room to be had. While their stolen vessel wasn''t too cramped, it wasn''t like there was room to run around either.

    "Woo, we made it!" shouted Luffy as he happily spring boarded off their boat. Nami and Zoro also made their way off the ships, though at a far more sedate pace than their Captain.

    "Was there any doubt?" asked Nami, cocking her hips. If she was being honest, there was in fact, a bit of doubt. But not because of her navigation skills, oh no, it was all because someone ate all the damn food. She liked to watch her figure, but not enough to starve herself.

    "Huh, not bad. Guess you''re useful for something after all," snarked Zoro. He stood near the boats, one hand on his swords, gazing out at the beach they found themselves on. There wasn''t much to see besides rocks and sand. The only thing of note was a single path leading further into the island, surrounded by sheer cliffs.

    "Excuse me!?" Nami asked, offended. The two of them glared at each other, as Nick watched, more than a bit nervous. He really didn''t want to have to defend Nami from Zoro. It would prove to be rather emasculating, if not fatal.

    Luffy laughed as he swiveled his head this way and that, taking in everything that he could, excited beyond measure for his next adventure. But then, a familiar sensation arose from his stomach, one that he had been feeling for about a day now, and a growling noise echoed throughout the area, sounding like a starving wolf.

    "Ah man, I''m so hungry¡­" he complained.

    The others turned toward him, Nami and Zoro forgetting their animosity for each other, at least temporarily, and shifted it to the straw hat wearing youth.

    "I don''t want to hear it anymore! You''re the one who ate all our food, you don''t get to complain!" yelled Nami. Luffy turned to her with big, sad, watery eyes, "But Nami¡­"

    "Don''t you "But Nami" me! We''re all hungry thanks to you!" she screamed. Just then, her own stomach started to growl, reminding her again of her own desire for food. She grabbed her stomach, hanging her head low, with tears in the corner of her eyes, "Damn it, how did things end up like this?"

    Luffy looked a bit guilty at causing his crew undue suffering, but he just couldn''t help himself. When he was hungry, he couldn''t think of anything else, and he always seemed to need to eat more than everybody else as well. Ace thought it was because of his Devil Fruit, but Luffy wasn''t so sure about that. His grandpa liked to eat too, and he didn''t have a Devil Fruit, at least as far as he knew.

    Zoro sighed as he looked at the pitiful sight, "Geez, toughen up will you? It''s just a bit of hunger, not like it''ll kill you," he said. And he should know after his stunt in Shells Town and going nearly three weeks without food. This was nothing compared to that.

    Of course, that knowledge didn''t stop his own stomach from protesting the lack of food. It might have actually been the loudest, letting Zoro and everyone know it did not appreciate having to go without sustenance once again.

    "Oh yeah, you''re a real tough guy," said Nami, with a cocky grin on her face. Zoro''s own face lit up with a blush, as he angrily told Nami to shut up. But she only continued to tease him, happy to have one up on him.

    Nick watched this happen with a grin, fully enjoying the show. But something caught his attention, something in the corner of his eye. He made his way over to it, completely ignored by the others.

    "Hey guys, take a look at this!" Nick shouted. The others turned towards him, only to find him some ways away, crouching over something. They made their way over to him, curious to see what he''d found.

    "What is it?" Nami asked, as she placed her hands on his shoulders and leaned over to see what had him so enthralled. Nick stiffened from the contact, not because it was painful or anything, but because he knew, just inches away from his head, were a pair of breasts most magnificent, taunting him with their proximity.

    "Come on, just a little more, you can do it. Don''t stop now!" he shouted in his mind. If she leaned over, even just a tiny bit more, his head would be encompassed by those mammary monsters. He would look like Mickey Mouse.

    But they didn''t. They stayed just out of reach, like all his hopes and dreams.

    Zoro and Luffy looked curious as well, as Nick held up a piece of wood. It was rough and splintered, clearly having seen better days. Parts of it were singed as well, showing signs of a fire or an explosion.

    "That''s it? A piece of wood?" Zoro asked in his usual grumpy manner. Nick rolled his eyes. Honestly, did he think of nothing but swords and sake?

    "It''s not just one piece, look over there," he said. The others did so, and their eyes widened. Bits and pieces of lumber of all sizes lay strewn across the beach. They couldn''t see it from the angle they arrived in, considering there was a massive boulder in the way, but they could sure as hell see it now.

    "W-what happened here?" asked Nami, as she stood up straight, much to Nick''s disappointment. That was the opposite direction he wanted her to go.

    "You said they have a shipyard, didn''t you? It had to have come from there," said Zoro, looking around. There was nearly enough wood here to build a whole ship. He doubted it was just leftover wood they didn''t need, so what was going on?

    Looks like they would be running into trouble here as well. That''s what his gut was saying anyways.

    "Yeah. Come to think of it, there was a bunch of lumber in the ocean as well. I didn''t think much about it at the time, but now¡­" Nami said, trailing off.

    "Yeah, looks like somebody was attacked. The wood''s all burnt here, see?" said Nick. They did. And it wasn''t just the one piece either. Several of them showed signs of fire damage of some kind.

    Something definitely happened here.

    "Y-you know, maybe we should just head to the next island?" suggested Nami. The other looked at her incredulously for a second, before a loud growl coming from Luffy reminded her of something important.

    They had no food, and little water left. No matter what the situation was here, they couldn''t leave without supplies. That was a simple fact, and one that should not be ignored.

    "No! I want some meat!" shouted Luffy, seemingly to forget all about the piles of broken wood. "If someone wants to pick a fight, we''ll just kick their ass!"

    Zoro smirked and turned to the navigator, "Guess that''s that then."

    Captain and swordsman began to make their way toward the village, heading for the one path that led away from the beach. A slope, fairly steep, with rock walls on either side. There was no other way to enter the island that they could see. Not unless they wanted to climb that is.

    Nami sighed, hanging her head again, knowing there was nothing she could do. Even if they were fully stocked, she doubted Luffy would leave. It wasn''t like he was afraid of anything, so why would he?

    An arm around her shoulder brought her out of her thoughts. She turned to see Nick giving her a reassuring smile, "Come on, I''m sure everything will be ok. I doubt it could be anything worse than Buggy, and we kicked his ass. We''ll be fine."

    She returned his smile, "I guess you''re right. Fine, let''s go. But I fully expect you to protect me, got it? That''s why I freed you in the first place."

    Nick grimaced a little bit at the reminder of his debt, "Are you sure it wasn''t my winning personality that won you over?"

    "What winning personality?" she asked, throwing his arm off of her. He pouted at her response as she stuck his tongue out at him, running to catch up with the other two. Nick laughed to himself and made to follow, content to bring up the rear.

    And not just because of the rear in front of him either. That was just an added bonus.

    Nami turned to look back at Nick with a smirk on her face, before she found herself bumping into what felt like a brick wall. "Ow, what the¡­?" she complained, looking to see just what had the nerve to stand in her way.

    And of course it was none other than Zoro. "Hey, what do you think you''re-"

    "Quiet," Zoro interrupted her oncoming tirade. He was looking above, to the top of the cliff, with his hand on his sword, ready to draw it in a moment''s notice. As much as Nami wanted to yell at him for telling her to be quiet, she was more concerned with what put him on edge.

    "What is it?" she asked, looking around nervously. He didn''t respond for a moment, which allowed Nick to catch up. He and Luffy looked at Zoro in confusion, wondering what the hold up was.

    "We''re not alone," he responded. Nick desperately wanted to make a crack about aliens and how they were going to probe them, but he didn''t. Instead, he shifted his gaze to the top of the cliff as well, trying to spot the person he knew was there.

    If memory serves him right, which was a big if, it should be Usopp up there. He was pretty sure there were some kids too, but he wasn''t sure. It had been a long time since he watched this arc, and it wasn''t the most memorable.

    Nami seemed to grow even more nervous, as she slowly made her way behind her meat shield, aka, Nick. He only watched her amused, knowing there wasn''t really any threat.

    Luffy was also looking around for whatever Zoro seemed to sense, but after a few short moments, he seemed to give up, his stomach reminding him it was empty, "So hungry¡­" he complained, falling to his knees.

    The rest of them ignored his antics, waiting for something to happen. They didn''t have to wait very long. Out from one of the bushes, something raced towards them at breakneck speeds.

    Luffy had just enough time to look up and see it heading straight for him. With a panicked shout, he placed his arms in front of him to protect himself and shut his eyes. It was mostly a reflex, considering bullets did fuck all nothing to him.

    Luckily for the rubber man, Zoro reacted instantly, his sword moving in an arc to deflect whatever it was. It hit his sword with a resounding twang, flying off into the distance. Whatever it was, it was clearly made of metal.

    Luffy opened his eyes when nothing seemed to strike him, and saw Zoro standing there with his sword out. He let out a sigh of relief, "Thanks Zoro."

    "Don''t mention it," responded the three sword style user.

    "What the hell was that?" asked Nami, still cowering behind Nick. She poked her head out from his torso, looking around for whatever made the attack.

    "Don''t know, but whatever it was, it was fast and metal," said Zoro, his eyes never leaving the spot the projectile came from, even as Luffy made to stand up beside him.

    They all stood there waiting for another attack, but when nothing came, Luffy became angry, steam practically rushing from his ears. Not only had his crew been attacked, but whoever it was had the nerve to hinder his search for food.

    That was unforgivable!

    "Hurry up and fight us already so I can get some meat!" he shouted. His only response seemed to be the wind, which only made him even angrier.

    "They''re stalling," said Nick. Even though he knew the threat was minimal at best, he was just as hungry as the rest of them and wanted this farce to be over with. That was something he could agree with Lufffy on.

    "Yeah, but why?" asked Nami. She couldn''t understand the reasoning.

    "Hmm, maybe whoever is up there is waiting for reinforcements," Nick suggested with a shrug. "Or maybe, they''re just a coward." He said that last part a bit louder, hoping to get a reaction out of the long nosed liar.

    And he wasn''t disappointed. The shrubs and trees began to shake, until it was a cacophony of noise. How and why were plants so loud? It didn''t make any sense.

    "How dare you call the Great Captain Usopp a coward! You have invoked my wrath!" shouted a young sounding voice, echoing throughout the area. The others seemed to tense up, but Nick just crossed his arms over his chest, looking bored with the whole spectacle.

    "Bring it on!" Luffy challenged, breathing from his nose like an enraged bull. Finally, he could punch somebody and then get some meat.

    "You are not worthy enough to face me! If you wish to do so, you must first beat my crew of one million!" shouted the voice again. Having said that, shapes began to pop up everywhere. From the bushes to the trees, until there were dozens all lined up.

    Each and every figure seemed to move and sway, giving the illusion of life. But Nick knew better. They were nothing but cardboard cutouts, shaped to look like humans, their true form hidden by the shadows of the woods.

    "Bit short of a million, dontcha think? I only count about 5," stated Nami with a sweatdrop. Who in their right mind would believe such an outrageous lie? She was startled for a moment, but her keen eyes were able to pick up the people attempting to hide. They weren''t very good at it.

    "What a joke," mumbled Zoro. He too was able to tell the difference. For a second there, he thought he might have a good fight on his hands. Talk about disappointing.

    "What! One million!?" screamed Luffy. The others stared at him for a moment, before Zoro face palmed, using the hand that wasn''t holding a sword, thankfully.

    "Damn it Luffy!" he complained.

    Even the voice seemed a bit taken aback by the fact that he was believed, "T-that''s right. So leave right this instant! Pirates are not welcome here!"

    "Or clowns!" shouted another voice.

    "Onion, shh!" whisper yelled the first voice.

    "Oops, sorry Captain."

    Three of the four pirates below sweat dropped at this. They couldn''t be serious could they? And how did they know they were pirates?

    Looking back, Nick saw the Jolly Roger of the Buggy Pirates, flying proudly on their stolen vessel, mocking them.

    "Maybe we should have swapped that out?" asked Nick. Nami looked at him confused for a moment, before turning to see what he was looking at. When she did, a sigh escaped her lips, "Yeah, probably."

    "I don''t care how many of you there are! I''ll kick all of your asses!" shouted Luffy. He thrust his fist in an uppercut motion to emphasize his eagerness to punch first and ask questions later.

    "But Captain! How can we possibly defeat a million men? It''s impossible! We should just leave now while we have the chance," Nick commented, with clear sarcasm in his voice. Nami and Zoro looked confused when he first started speaking, but that turned into smirks when they realized he was being sarcastic.

    "What!?" Luffy shouted, turning to his crew mate in confusion and outrage. It was hard for the others to hold in their laughter at seeing his face.

    "He''s right Luffy. We don''t stand a chance against them," stated Nami, her own sarcasm coming in clearly.

    "Not you too!?" Luffy yelled in disbelief. What was wrong with his crew? Didn''t they realize there was meat to be had? That was worth all the danger in the world. "Zoro?" he asked, sure he would agree with him.

    "Hmm, I don''t know¡­ A million might be pretty tough," Zoro said, smirking at the steam coming off of Luffy.

    "What! You can''t be serious!?" he yelled, stomping his foot in anger. He turned back toward the cliff, glaring daggers at the top of it where he heard the voice come from. "Fine, I''ll just beat them myself, and no meat for you!"

    The three of them were now struggling quite a bit to keep the laughter in. But his angry, pouty face made it very difficult to do so.

    "You should listen to your friends! But if you truly wish to die then so be it!" yelled that first voice again. Nick had to wonder if he picked up on their sarcasm, unlike Luffy. Or was the liar just as gullible as their Captain?

    "Just you try it!" Luffy challenged.

    Usopp glared down at the pirates below him. If that''s the way they wanted to play, fine. He looked to his friends, each of them giving him a nod in return. It was now or never. They all loaded up their slingshots with ammo before taking aim.

    Let''s see if he could dodge this!

    Usopp was the first to fire, and the first one to miss. He growled in frustration, as his foe easily dodged every attack made. How was he doing this? Sure, he didn''t actually have a million men, but he did have five, and none of them could land a hit.

    One after the other, the pirate maneuvered out of the way. He was as slippery as an eel. This wasn''t going at all like how he pictured in his head.

    "Captain, what do we do? We can''t hit him!" questioned a panicked Carrot. It was crazy! No one should be able to move like that. It was like he was made of rubber or something!

    "Just keep firing! He''ll make a mistake eventually!" Usopp answered back. No matter how good at avoiding their attacks he was, no one could dodge forever, They just needed to wait for the right moment.

    He was also worried about the rest of the pirates. None of them were doing a thing to help. The only thing they did was cheer him on.

    "You got this!" or "That was a close one!" That was the only thing they did. And even that was only two of them. The third guy, who just so happened to also be the scariest, was just watching with a bored look on his face.

    Seriously, what was wrong with them!? Did they not care if their friend was killed? While he may not have been using a pistol, the heavy metal balls they were using carried enough force to crack open a skull.

    Or was it that they couldn''t do anything? Maybe the straw hat wearing guy was the only tough one? Yeah, that had to be it! That other guy just looked scary. So if they beat the one in the straw hat, the others would flee in terror! Perfect!

    With a grin, Usopp redoubled his efforts to strike down the people who dared to threaten the peace of his home. Such an action was unforgivable. He has never killed anyone before, but he couldn''t think about that now. All that mattered was protecting his home and the people he cared about.

    Now if only his knees would stop shaking.

    "Uh-oh, he almost got you that time Captain!" yelled the man with brown hair. Usopp watched as their target grew angry at the mocking.

    "Will you shut up!?" he shouted back, turning to face the person making fun of him.

    This was his chance! The dodgy bastard was as distracted as distracted could be. He quickly loaded another metal ball before pulling his slingshot back further than he ever has before, releasing the pellet. It flew fast and true, striking the target in the back.

    "Got him!" Usopp cheered, with the others following suit. It may not have been a head shot, but that blow should be more than enough to take him out.

    So it was with great confusion that he remained standing, having only stumbled a bit. "What the heck? He should be down for the count. What''s going on?" asked Usopp. He focused his eyes on the one he struck, only for them to nearly bug out of his head.

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    His front was stretching! The point of impact was now several feet ahead of him. Just what the hell was this guy!?

    After a few more seconds passed, Luffy straightened himself out, flinging the ball back where it came from. "Is that all you got!" he shouted, as it soared even faster than before, going cleanly through the head of one of the cutouts.

    Usopp''s own head leaned back as he examined the spot above him. Just a few inches from his head, embedded into the tree and still smoking, was a metal ball. The same one he had just fired moments ago.

    He fell to his ass in fear, as sweat dripped down his forehead. If that had been just a little bit closer, he would be dead right now. It took all his willpower not to piss himself. But on the plus side, his knees were no longer shaking. They were too scared to.

    "Captain, are you alright?" asked Onion. Usopp turned to look at him, noticing the concerned looks of his friends. With a gulp, trying to hide his fear, he said, "O-of course I am. It''ll take more than that to defeat the Great Captain Usopp."

    They seemed relieved to hear it, but the worry never left them. "What are we going to do Captain? That guy is some kind of monster," asked Pepper.

    That was a good question. What could they do?

    "Come on, we can''t give up! We still have our secret weapon," said Akisu. They all turned to look at him in confusion, before their eyes lit up. Of course, how could they forget about that?

    If a slingshot didn''t work, then it was time to bring out the big guns.

    Luffy and the others stared at the cliff waiting for something to happen. But when nothing did, said rubber man became agitated, "Come out already!"

    Nothing. Absolute silence greeted his demand. The only thing that could be heard is the wind traveling through the trees and the shifting of the ocean tides. It was almost enough to make them forget about their troubles.

    "Think they ran away?" asked Nami, arms crossing over her chest.

    "Probably. I mean, after seeing their attack doing nothing to Luffy, what other choice did they have?" asked Nick.

    "I won''t let them get away!" shouted Luffy as he flung his arms back. Zoro was barely able to avoid them as he jumped out of the way, cursing Luffy the whole time. The rubber man then flung his arms forward, grabbing hold of the top of the cliff.

    "Luffy, what are you-"

    But that was as far as Nami got before the shout of, "Gum Gum: Rocket!" interrupted her. Luffy went flying off into the sky, disappearing past the tree line. The others covered their faces from the debris that was kicked up from the action.

    "Damn it, what the hell is he thinking?" growled Zoro, wiping sand off of his haramaki. He really hated the stuff. It was coarse, rough and irritating. And it got everywhere.

    "Who knows," Nami said with a sigh. When she agreed to join them, at least until the Grand Line, she never expected she would become a babysitter. Especially not to a pirate.

    Nick was more curious about the weapons used to attack them. He squatted down and picked up a shiny metal object, holding it up and blowing off the sand. It looked like a pachinko ball, though it had a bit more heft to it than a normal one.

    "Whatcha got there?" asked Nami.

    "See for yourself," he said, tossing it to her. She panicked for a moment as she juggled it, trying to keep it from falling to the ground. When she was successful, she gave Nick a glare, which he returned with a cheeky smile.

    Deciding to ignore him for now, she inspected the object in her hand. "A pachinko ball?'' she questioned out loud. Zoro gave it a cursory glance before seeming to lose interest.

    "That''s what it looks like to me," said Nick.

    "Weird choice of weapon," she commented, before tossing it back to Nick, who caught it with no problem, much to her irritation.

    Then, without so much as a ''by your leave'' Zoro began making his way toward the sloping path once more.

    "Hey, where do you think you''re going?" questioned Nami.

    "Where do you think?" he responded, without missing a step. Nami huffed at the non answer, before following. It was better than staying here at any rate. Besided, they needed to make sure Luffy didn''t do anything stupid.

    Something of a tall order.

    Nick turned and gave the beach one last look. More specifically, the spot with all the destroyed lumber. He narrowed his eyes in thought, tossing the pachinko ball up and catching it before making to follow the others.

    He could think about it all he wants, he wouldn''t be getting any answers here.

    "Ahh!"

    Just as the three of them reached the beginning of the path, a loud yell stopped them dead. It wasn''t just any scream either, it was one that was familiar to the three of them. It was a scream that just so happened to belong to their rubber Captain who flew off into the sunset.

    And now he was screaming. Because of course he would be. The three of them weren''t particularly worried about the sound as much as they were exasperated by it.

    "Damn it Luffy, what have you gotten into this time," cursed Zoro. The last time he heard him scream like that he was in the maw of a big ass bird. Hopefully that wouldn''t be the case this time.

    "Come on, we better go see what''s wrong," said Nick. The other two nodded and they began to run up the hill toward the sound of the scream. They weren''t sprinting, because that would be too much effort, but nobody could call them slow either.

    As they reached the top, they looked around, trying to spot their wayward companion. The sound of a struggle drew their attention. "Over there!" yelled Nami. They quickly made their way towards it, only to stop dead once more at the sight.

    It was Luffy alright, or at least the lower half of him. The rest of him was inside of a large, wooden dragon thing painted red. Its neck was made of segmented barrels, connected by some kind of rubber tube. Its head was made of something similar, and they could see wooden, teeth shaped spikes coming out of its mouth.

    Luffy was lucky they didn''t seem to be very sharp.

    The thing''s body was just a massive box, also painted red. On top of it appeared to be spines, though these were painted yellow, and what looked like a hatch of some kind. In front of the hatch was what looked like a periscope, the kind they use on submarines.

    Beneath the body were four tires that looked like they belonged on a wagon, only studded. A long tail jutted out from behind it, made of similar material to the neck, only each barrel got smaller and smaller until it reached a point. Like a real tail.

    In other words, it was a large, wooden dragon.

    The three newcomers could only stare in bewilderment at what was happening. The neck of the thing was flailing wildly, as Luffy''s legs did the same thing. They could hear Luffy''s screams, far more clearly from here. It didn''t sound like he was in pain, so that was good.

    It was far funnier than it was worrisome.

    "Ahh, get it off me!" Luffy screamed. His arms were pinned to his side by the ''teeth'', so he couldn''t use his strength to get himself out. It was highly frustrating for the rubber man.

    "Hahaha, you should have run when you had the chance! This is what you get for defying the Great Captain Usopp!" shouted a voice from inside the dragon.

    "Ah, so that''s it," thought Nick. He was wondering what happened to Usopp. Seems like he was inside the makeshift dragon. Those kids were probably inside it as well. Guess he should make sure Zoro doesn''t cut it to pieces then.

    "Luffy, what the hell are you doing?" asked Zoro. The whole spectacle would have been far more amusing if it weren''t for the fact that he was starving. Instead, it just made the green haired swordsman irritated.

    "Zoro, is that you!? Help me! I''m stuck!" Luffy yelled. His legs seemed to kick even more wildly at the plea.

    "I can see that you moron! How did you get stuck!?" he yelled back. Nick and Nami were both snickering at the exchange, much to Zoro''s further annoyance.

    "Who cares, just help me!" Luffy ordered. By this point, the ''dragon'' had stopped moving, and seemed to be looking at them.

    "Damn it, fine," cursed Zoro as he began making his way toward them.

    "You got this!" cheered Nami.

    "I believe in you!" encouraged Nick.

    "Both of you can go to hell," responded Zoro. They only chuckled at his misery, and wished they had some popcorn.

    "So, you''ve come to save your ally?" questioned a voice from inside the dragon as Zoro approached. The swordsman raised an eyebrow as he came to a stop a few feet from it. "Something like that. Now let him go, before this gets ugly," he threatened, using his thumb to unsheath part of his blade.

    Inside the dragon, a sweaty Usopp looked out through the periscope with concern. That green haired guy was really intimidating! But they had the upper hand here, and he wasn''t going to give in so easily.

    He turned to look at his companions, who were equally as sweaty inside the construction, "Alright men, on my mark, full retreat." They nodded in recognition, looking determined through the misery. They forgot how hot the inside of this thing was!

    Usopp used some levers and pulleys to control the dragon''s head, bringing it down lower to seemingly give their captive back. But that was just a ploy!

    As soon as the body was lowered enough to obscure the front of the dragon, Usopp opened up a hatch on the front of the body, exposing him to the outside. He wished he could enjoy the fresh air that came through, but he had a job to do.

    Grabbing a small ball from his bag, he loaded it into the slingshot and took aim. Unlike the last ammunition he used, this one was special. With a grin on his face, Usopp unleashed his surprise attack.

    "Special Attack: Smoke Star!"

    Zoro''s eyes widened at the shout. He was just about to grab his idiot Captain out of the jaws of this thing, when suddenly his entire vision was obscured by smoke. He coughed and tried to wave the smoke away, but to no avail. His eyes and throat burned from whatever it was.

    "Now!" yelled Usopp.

    When the smoke finally did clear, he could see the dragon speeding away from him. "Hey, wait damn it!" he yelled as he gave chase. All he wanted was some sake, was that too much to ask for?

    Usopp grinned as he watched through the periscope as the scary mad chased after them. Normally, that would scare the hell out of him, but this time he had a plan. Swiveling the periscope around, he saw what he was looking for. A nice big rock.

    Perfect.

    He looked back at his crew, who were pedaling like crazy. It was the way the dragon moved, like a five person bike.

    "Good job men. Keep going, we''ve got him right where we want him," he encouraged them. But it seemed to fall on deaf ears.

    "Captain, why aren''t you pedaling?" asked Carrot, breathing heavy as his legs and lungs burned in equal measure. The rest of the Usopp Pirates looked at him, wondering the same thing.

    "Because Carrot, that''s what I have you guys for," he told them.

    "You lazy jerk!" they yelled back.

    "Hush, it''s almost time!" Usopp told them. They grumbled a bit, but didn''t complain any further. Looking through the periscope, Usoop made sure they were going right towards the rock, using a small steering wheel to guide them. He also made sure the green haired guy was just the right distance away.

    With a cocky grin, he opened a hatch on the bottom of the dragon''s body, and grabbed a bucket with a dark liquid inside. "Hehe, let''s see how you like my Ultra Slippery Mystery Compound 5,000!" Usopp said with a giggle as he poured it down the hatch.

    "I''ve got you now!" yelled Zoro, his hand mere inches away from grabbing the dragon''s tail. But that plan went up in smoke as a strange liquid poured out of the bottom of the dragon. He didn''t even see it before his foot landed on top of it, sending him sliding across the ground.

    "What the hell!?" he shouted. He tried to grab hold of something to slow down, but his hands were coated in the liquid, so he couldn''t find his grip. The dragon in front of him swerved out of the way and Zoro''s eyes widened comically at the sight of the large boulder he was about to slam into.

    "Son of a-" but that was as far as he got before sliding headfirst into it. He lay there for a moment, head throbbing in pain.

    "Ooh, that looked like it hurt," commented Nick, as he stood beside Nami watching the ''fight''. The girl next to him was equal parts amused and irritated. Amused, because she got to see Mr. Tough Guy fall for the trap, and irritated because she wanted food.

    "I wish they''d just hurry up already," she grumbled.

    Zoro forced himself into a seated position, holding his head in pain and cursing up a storm, swearing vengeance. "When I get my hands on them¡­"

    But a noise halted his tirade. Looking up, he noticed the familiar sight of the dragon heading straight for him. With another panicked shout, he tried to get up, but it was to no avail. He was just too slippery.

    And the dragon barreled into him.

    "Hahaha! Take that! No one can defeat the mighty Dragon Tank Mk. 4!" shouted Usopp in glee. He looked through the periscope, eager to see the sight of his enemy, squashed like a pancake into the ground.

    But no matter where he looked, he couldn''t find him. He was just gone, vanished, like he was never there to begin with. Looking away from the periscope, a thought occurred to Usopp¡­ Could he have been a ghost the whole time? That couldn''t be true, right? Ghosts weren''t real¡­

    Usopp was broken out of his fearful mind by a sudden jerking. He and the others nearly went flying.

    "W-what was that?" he questioned. Looking through the periscope once more, Usopp''s eyes nearly bugged out of his head as he saw the grinning face of Zoro, firmly grabbing the tail and halting their forward momentum.

    "Ahh! Where did you come from!?" Usopp shouted. He wasn''t there a second ago, it was like he appeared out of thin air! He really was a ghost!

    "I''ve got you now!" Zoro shouted with a savage grin. As the dragon passed over him he managed to grab onto its tail. It took him a bit to get to his feet, but now that he was, it was time for some sweet, sweet revenge.

    "No! Let go!" Usopp yelled back. He quickly began to help his crew pedal, using all of his strength to do so. But their dragon tank refused to budge more than a few inches.

    "Come on! Pedal harder!" he shouted behind him.

    "We are!" they yelled back. But it was useless. No matter how hard they tried, they couldn''t get away, and it was exhausting them. If they didn''t do something soon, it would be all over.

    "Damn it, how strong is this guy?" complained Usopp. It was absurd! The guy must have been made out of muscle.

    "Captain, I have an idea! Just give me a sec!" yelled Akisu. He hopped off of his station and made his way to the back. He opened up another hatch in the back, right below the dragon tail.

    With a savage grin, he loaded one of the pachinko balls into the slingshot and took aim. "Take this you pirate!"

    Zoro''s world erupted into pain. Time seemed to stop for a moment, before he let go of the tail, allowing the construction to speed away. His entire body turned white as he collapsed on the ground, holding his damaged balls in his hands, a pachinko ball innocently rolling away.

    Nick winced in pain as he watched this happen. That was just uncalled for. It didn''t stop Nami from laughing her ass off though. She just didn''t understand the pain a man went through when struck in his most vital area.

    "Guess that means you''re up," said Nami, getting her laughing under control. Nick sighed, realizing she was right. It didn''t look like Zoro would be up and fighting any time soon. It actually looked like he was trying not to throw up.

    "Fine, let''s get this over with," he said as he started walking toward the battlefield. He wouldn''t make the same mistake as the swordsman. He would protect his balls, no matter the cost. This, he swore!

    "Great job Akisu!" Usopp cheered, as he saw them take out one of their opponents. If they kept this up, they just might win this thing!

    "It was nothing," he responded, rubbing his nose with a smug look.

    Usopp then returned his gaze to the battlefield, noticing they had another challenger. "Look alive men! Bogey at 12 o''clock!"

    Nick watched as the dragon charged straight for him. He wondered if they grew overconfident at their victory over Zoro. Not that he could blame them if that were the case, very few people could claim the same.

    The hatch on the front opened up again, and Nick could see Usopp glaring at him with his slingshot pulled back. Well that wasn''t good.

    The metal balls came swiftly, and Nick was surprised just how fast he could fire them off. It was nearly two a second. He couldn''t help but respect the dedication it took to get that good with a slingshot.

    But still, he should have used a gun. Nick was able to weave around every shot fired, even as they came closer and closer. His dodging ability was extremely frustrating for Usopp, who prided himself on his aim.

    "Just hold still, damn it!" he yelled. Nick gave him a taunting smirk, further enraging him. But furthermore, he did exactly as Usopp asked. He stood there, and waited.

    Usopp aimed another shot and fired. Nick held out his hand, doing something the sniper never saw coming. He caught it.

    "Y-you''ve got to be kidding me¡­" said Usopp. He was so shocked he didn''t even fire another shot. He just watched as Nick continued to give him a cocky smirk. Was everyone in that crew a monster?

    While Nick may have seemed cool and collected on the outside, the inside was a totally different story. "Ahh! Mother fucker that hurt! That was stupid fucking idea, what was I thinking, god damn son of a bitch!"

    But he did his best not to let on how much pain he was in. Honestly, he was just thankful his hand wasn''t broken. But he did have an idea, "This isn''t the item I ordered, so you can have it back!"

    He brought his arm back like a pitcher and chucked it straight at the opening. With a panicked yell, Usopp ducked his head, the ball going inside the compartment and bouncing around.

    The others screamed in panic as well, but luckily for them, it didn''t hit anybody. With a sigh of relief, Usopp turned back to the opening, only to see a certain somebody missing.

    Not again! What''s with these guy''s and their disappearing acts?

    "Where did he go?" questioned Usopp. If he couldn''t see him in the front, maybe he could find him in the back. Looking through the periscope once more, Usopp felt his heart stop as he stared into the smiling face of the man he was looking for.

    "Hello there!" Nick said, giving him a jaunty wave, channeling his inner Obi-Wan Kenobi. The sound of Usopp''s alarmed scream was music to his ears.

    The long-nosed liar watched in horror as he placed his hands on the hatch and began to turn it. With a panicked yelp, he grabbed the other side of it and tried to prevent Nick from getting inside.

    "Why are they all so strong!?" Usopp yelled, as the hatch door was slowly but surely turning. This was bad, he couldn''t let him in here, but he didn''t have the strength to prevent it. It was just a matter of time now.

    "Hey, Captain¡­" said a tentative voice. Usopp looked through clenched eyes at Onion, who looked like he had something to say. "W-what is it? I''m a little busy in case you didn''t know," he said.

    "I know, it''s just¡­"

    "What is it!? Spit it out already!"

    "Who''s driving this thing?"

    Usopp stared at him for a moment, not quite comprehending the question. But then, like a bolt of lightning, realization dawned on him. He turned to the still open hatch in the front, and saw a sight that took his breath away, in the worst way possible.

    They were heading straight for a tree. And it wasn''t a small one either.

    "Oh crap, hit the brakes!" shouted Usopp.

    Nick also saw what was coming and decided now would be a good time to bail. He jumped off the roof, rolling to a stop on the ground. He watched in amusement as the dragon slammed right into a tree.

    Well, nothing seemed to be on fire, so that was good. Nick started walking nonchalantly toward the dragon, hands behind his head. When he did reach it, he saw some bits and pieces of wood laying on the ground, having splintered off from the main body.

    There was also a Luffy, still struggling inside the things mouth. Man, that was some solid construction they put into this thing. Not a whole lot could keep him contained like that. Or maybe he just wasn''t trying his hardest. If that was the case, then Zoro was going to kill him.

    "Hey Luffy, need some help?" he asked, coming to a stop next to the rubber man. The flailing stopped, "Nick? Is that you?"

    "Sure is. Hang on a second, I''ll get you out of there," he told him. With that said, Nick grabbed onto the top and bottom of the jaw, and pulled. It took a lot more force than he hoped, and Luffy had to help, but he managed to get him free.

    Luffy landed on the ground with an oomph, staring up at the sky. Nick peered down at him, obscuring Luffy''s vision, "How''s it feel to be a free man?"

    Luffy stared at him for a moment, before a big grin lit up his face. He jumped to his feet and stretched his body out, "I''m always free."

    "Uh huh, so what were the last five minutes then?"

    "Shut up!"

    A sudden movement distracted them from their bickering. The dragon they thought was out of commission was moving backwards, quickly gaining distance from them.

    "Hey, get back here!" Luffy yelled angrily, before he started chasing it. Nick just watched them go, before making his way toward the downed swordsman, "I''m sure he''s got this."

    Usopp was breathing heavily as he and the others pedaled backward for all they were worth. That was too close. For a second there he thought that the Dragon Tank Mk. 4 was done for, but it seems like it was even sturdier than he thought.

    But that was somewhat irrelevant. Looking back at this crew, it was clear that they''ve had it. They were simply too tired to continue. It took all of their remaining stamina just to get away.

    He had only one option left¡­

    "Alright men that''s enough! It''s time!" he told them. They looked at him with bleary eyes, but they held a spark of recognition at his proclamation.

    "Are you sure Captain? We can keep going," said Pepper. It warmed Usopp''s heart to see him acting so brave, but that''s all it was, an act. He knew they couldn''t actually keep going.

    "Yeah I''m sure. Get ready, this is our final stand!"

    They nodded, eyes sparkling. It wasn''t very often they got to see brave Usopp, so they wanted to enjoy the moment while it lasted.

    Because they knew it wouldn''t last long.

    The dragon suddenly came to a stop, causing Luffy to do the same. He gazed up at the thing in confusion, before a loud voice caught his attention.

    "It seems I''ve underestimated you! Now, you''ll witness the true power of the Dragon Tank Mk. 4!"

    "Oh yeah!? Bring it on!" Luffy shouted.

    "So be it. Behold! Its mighty transformation!"

    The dragon''s neck and tail began to straighten out, before the barrels that composed them locked together, creating a large tube. Its jaws opened wide, creating an opening that could be used to fire much larger ammunition.

    "Huh, it really does look like a tank," muttered Nick, as he stood beside Zoro. "Guess they didn''t name it that for nothing." The green haired swordsman was still on the ground, but at least he was on his hands and knees now, even if his whole form was trembling.

    "Those little bastards¡­ When I get my hands on them¡­" Zoro threatened through grit teeth. Nick could only give him a look of pity. "Man, you''ve really had it rough these last two islands huh? First the laxatives, and now this?"

    "Shut¡­ up¡­"

    Nami only watched the transformation with exasperation, "Really?" She couldn''t wait for this stupid fight to be over already. As much as she enjoyed watching Zoro get hit in the balls, that novelty has worn off. Now, she just wanted some damn lunch already!

    Luffy, however, had the exact opposite reaction to Nami, "So cool!"

    Usopp did feel a bit of smug pride as he heard the straw hat guy praise his baby. They worked really hard to make it and he was happy it was appreciated, even if it was by the enemy.

    "You won''t think it''s so cool in just a moment. This is my ultimate weapon! If you thought I was dangerous before, just wait until you see this!"

    Having made his threat, he pulled back on the rubber bands connected to the jaws, placing a much bigger metal ball inside of it. He carefully took aim at his enemy, pointing the tube directly at him.

    "If you don''t want to die, I suggest you leave right now, and never come back!"

    Luffy''s happy smile disappeared, as his gaze turned hard. He grabbed the top of his hat, causing shadow to cover his eyes. "So that''s your best weapon huh?"

    While he said that fairly quietly, it still seemed to be heard by everyone. Almost like his words were carried by the wind.

    Usopp started trembling, even though he didn''t know why. Sure, he was a coward, and trembling was part of his basic bodily functions, but until now, he hasn''t felt threatened by these pirates at all.

    Well, except for that green haired guy.

    "T-that''s right. So leave before I''m forced to use this thing," Usopp threatened again.

    But Luffy did no such thing. In fact he did the complete opposite. He began to walk forward, taking slow deliberate steps towards Usopp.

    "Weapons aren''t for show. They aren''t used to make threats either. Weapons are for actions. If you point your weapon at me you must be prepared to die," Luffy said, stopping just in front of the barrel, eyes staring daggers into Usopp''s very soul.

    The trembling became even worse, almost to the point he was vibrating. The sweat dripping down his forehead no longer had anything to do with the heat inside the tank. It was a response to his fear. Staring into the eyes of the pirate in front of him, all he could imagine was his own death. If he fired his weapon, it was all over.

    "So can you do it?" asked Luffy, never once taking his eyes off of Usopp, "Can you fire your weapon? Are you willing to risk your life? That''s what it means to take on a real pirate."

    It wasn''t just Usopp that was trembling now, his friends were as well. It was like they were looking into the eyes of the devil himself. They were too scared to even piss themselves.

    That wasn''t the case for Luffy''s one crew. They watched the show with smirks on their faces. Well, Nick and Zoro did, Nami just wanted the whole thing to be over.

    Seconds ticked by with nothing happening, before finally, Usopp couldn''t take the pressure any more, and let go of the giant slingshot. But nothing came out, the heavy metal ball falling to the ground, and rolling out of reach.

    Usopp sighed as he slumped back, small tears in the corner of his eyes. "Oh man, so this is what real pirates are like. I didn''t stand a chance."

    Before he could delve too deeply into his pity well, a loud boisterous laugh broke him from his thoughts. He looked out through the tank barrel to see Luffy chuckling at him. But that only seemed to make him angry.

    "Hey, just because you won doesn''t mean you can laugh at me!" Usopp shouted. Luffy seemed confused for a second, before he seemed to realize what Usopp meant.

    "Sorry about that. I wasn''t laughing at you. I was just remembering the last time I heard that speech," Luffy said. Now it was Usopp''s turn to be confused. "Last time? You mean, you didn''t come up with it?"

    The young man didn''t know whether or not he should feel insulted. On one hand, he wasn''t good enough for his own speech. On the other hand, Luffy used a speech from someone he knew, and it was a pretty damn good one too.

    Guess it all depended on where the speech came from.

    "Nope. I stole that from a pirate named Shanks," said Luffy. Thinking of the man always brought a smile to his face, and Luffy couldn''t help but remove his hat and stare at it, remembering the day he heard that speech.

    "Wait a minute!" shouted Usopp, before he quickly undid the latch on top of the dragon tank, and popping his upper body out of it. "You''re not talking about Read Haired Shanks are you?"

    "Sure am," Luffy said with a smile. He then gave Usopp a curious stare, "Hey, have we met before?"

    Now it was Usopp''s turn to give him a curious look, "Uh, no. I don''t think so."

    "Are you sure? You look familiar¡­" Luffy said, adopting a thinking pose. Usopp could only stare in confusion, wondering just what was going through Luffy''s mind.

    After several seconds, the light bulb in Luffy''s head turned on, "I know! You''re Yasopp''s son, right!"

    Hearing his father''s name caused Usopp to freeze solid. "Wha? How do you?" Without meaning to, he leaned forward and fell right off of the tank, landing in a painful heap on the ground. He looked up as he heard footsteps approach and saw the grinning face of Luffy.

    "How do you know my dad?"

    Luffy just kept grinning as he stared at Usopp, before he reached out his hand for him to grab. With only a small bit of hesitation, he accepted the offer.

    "I''ll tell you over some meat!"

 Chapter 15

    "So tell me, how do you know my dad?" asked Usopp, staring at Luffy with an eager expression. And who could blame him? This was the first piece of news he''s heard about his old man in years.

    The six of them found themselves in a quaint little restaurant, with a veritable mountain of food placed before them. Usopp claimed it was the best restaurant in town, and judging by the smell, Nick could believe it.

    They were seated in a booth, with Nami, Luffy and Zoro on one side, and Nick, Usopp and Akisu on the other. Nick tried to sit next to the ginger haired beauty, but that little rubber bastard beat him to it.

    Luffy stared at his food with a literal river of drool cascading out of his mouth. Poor Nami and Zoro were getting drenched, gazing at him with disgust and annoyance.

    Not being able to hold back anymore, Luffy grabbed a big piece of meat and took a massive bite, ripping off a chunk with the zeal of a starving wolf. Which at this point, wasn''t far from the truth. The rest of them dug in at a more sedate pace, with Nami enjoying some kind of noodle dish, Zoro having his fish and sake, and Nick having some kind of meat with mashed potatoes.

    He wasn''t sure what it was exactly, but damn did it taste good!

    "Hey, are you listening!?" Usopp shouted. Here he was, practically vibrating on the spot, waiting to hear about his dad, and the glutton in front of him could only think about food! The nerve of some people.

    "Give it up. We haven''t eaten in about a day, so you won''t get anything out of him until he''s at least half full," said Nick, placing a piece of food in his mouth. He also made sure to watch Luffy carefully, just in case he tried to steal his food.

    "He''s right, just enjoy your meal for now," said Nami, savoring the sweet taste of her dish.

    Usopp let out a long suffering sigh, "Fine, what''s a few more minutes?" He went to place some food in his mouth, only to realize his fork was completely empty. Looking confused, Usopp shifted his gaze to his plate, only to find it empty.

    "What the¡­ Where did it go? I could have sworn¡­"

    But that''s when he realized there was a trail of sauce drippings leading straight to none other than Luffy. Who just so happened to be staring at him with his cheeks stuffed so full he could make a squirrel jealous.

    "What the hell''s your problem!?" he shouted, painting an accusing finger towards Luffy.

    "Huh? What''s the problem, you weren''t eating it," Luffy complained, as he swallowed Usopp''s food.

    "I was about to you jerk!"

    "That''s what you get for being too slow," said Zoro, who slapped Luffy''s hand away as he tried to steal some of the swordsman''s food.

    "He''s right. It''s a dog eat dog world out there," commented Nick, who also slapped one of Luffy''s hands away.

    "Should have known better," said Nami. But when Luffy went to try and steal her food, she was a bit more violent about dissuading him. She stabbed his hand with a fork.

    "Ah! Nami that hurt!" he screamed.

    "Then keep your hands to yourself!"

    Usopp could only stare at the group as Nami yelled at Luffy, and the other two laughed at the rubber man''s misery. "So this is what being a pirate is like. So cool!" he thought.

    Akisu had a different opinion on the matter, staring at the pirates with suspicion. After the battle, Usopp commanded him and the others to take their secret weapon back to their secret base.

    But Akisu had chosen to stay with their Captain, to try and make sure he didn''t do anything stupid. That was his official job as Usopp''s younger brother after all. The others complained, of course, but after promising to make them some of his special lemon bars, they relented.

    So here he was, watching them with the eyes of a hawk, intent on catching them doing something nefarious. However, there was something else he should have been watching instead.

    "Hey kid, you should probably eat something before it''s all gone," said a voice to his right. Looking up, he saw the tall, muscular guy they called Nick. What a weird name. But what was he saying about eating his food? He still had a full plate, so it couldn''t be¡­

    "Gone!" he shouted, looking at his very empty plate. But where did it go? How did it go? Akisu didn''t understand what had happened. He was watching them all so closely, it shouldn''t have been possible. But here he was, bereft of pancakes. Those were his favorite too¡­

    Looking up at the one he figured was responsible, he glared at the straw hat wearing pirate, whose face was covered in syrup.

    Syrup from his pancakes.

    "Wasn''t me," Luffy said, noticing his gaze, eyes shifting towards Nami. But like always, he was a terrible liar. Even worse than Usopp, and that was something Akisu never thought he''d see.

    "Don''t you try and blame me!" Nami shouted, having been watching the exchange. She pulled on Luffy''s cheek, causing him to cry out in pain, "Ow, ow, ow! Nami, stop it, that hurts!"

    "It''s supposed to!"

    Akisu and Usopp stared at the exchange in bewilderment. "Are they really pirates?" was both of their thoughts. And after Usopp thought they were so cool too.

    Nami sighed as she released his cheek, watching it bounce back into places, Luffy''s head rattling as it did so. He rubbed his cheek in pain for a moment, before getting distracted by food once again, happily shoveling it into his face.

    Nami turned to face Akisu, giving him a kind smile "Sorry about him. Don''t worry, I''ll get you some more." The poor young boy couldn''t help but blush at her smiling face. She may have been even prettier than Kaya, as hard as that was for him to believe.

    "U-uh, thank you¡­" he mumbled with a blush on his cheeks. Nami giggled at his embarrassment. He was just too cute.

    "Looks like you have some competition," Zoro said to Nick with a smirk, taking a swig of booze. The alcohol was really helping ease the pain in his balls, but he still wasn''t happy about it.

    Rather than be offended at the light hearted gibe, Nick played along, "You know, you might be right. I''ll have to up my game."

    Akisu''s face seemed to get even redder from the commentary. Nick chuckled at his response, even though he couldn''t for the life of him figure out who he was. He didn''t recognize him at all, and according to Usopp, Akisu was his brother, something he never had in the anime.

    Guess that was just another change he could chalk up to his presence.

    "Come on you two, leave him alone," Nami warned. Zoro rolled his eyes at her threatening tone, not intimidated in the least, while Nick just chuckled.

    "Hey, what about me? My food was stolen too you know," Usopp complained, completely ruining the moment.

    Nami gave him the side eye, "What about you? You''re an adult, get your own food."

    "What!?"

    "You know, you shouldn''t complain. It''s already a miracle she''s paying for his meal," said Nick. Nami redirected her glare to him, "And what''s that supposed to mean, huh? Do I have to increase your debt again?"

    "Case and point," Nick said.

    The meal continued like that for several more minutes until Luffy was finally ready to answer Usopp''s question. Telling him about how he met his dad, Yasopp, when he was little, and how he was the best sniper he''d ever seen, never missing a shot.

    Usopp listened to the whole thing, shaking with excitement. His eyes lit up in wonder as Luffy told him what he knew about his dad. He looked like a little kid on Christmas morning, ready to tear the shit out of some presents.

    "Wow, I can''t believe my dad knows such a famous pirate," Usopp said with wonder. He looked so proud about that fact too.

    "He doesn''t just know him, he''s part of his crew," said Luffy, chucking a whole damn apple into his mouth and chewing.

    "Seriously?"

    "Yeah. I haven''t seen him in a while, but I bet they''re still together. Your dad and Shanks were good friends."

    The other four listened to the story with interest. Zoro because he wanted to learn about powerful people, and even he''s heard of Red Haired Shanks long before Luffy told him about him.

    Nick wanted to know if there were any differences from the anime. It didn''t sound like it, but then again, he couldn''t remember the story exactly either. It sounded right, but who knows?

    Akisu was also mesmerized by the story. It also explained how Usopp was so good at sharpshooting. It was in his blood!

    And Nami, well she just couldn''t believe there were pirates like that. It eschewed everything she''s ever experienced. All the pirates she''s met, until Luffy that is, were complete monsters. And now she''s supposed to believe there are good pirates out there? She found that hard to believe.

    "Man, that''s so cool," Usopp said, looking like he was caught up in a daydream. Nick knew that feeling, but he somehow doubted it was for the same reasons. He sneakily gave Nami a look.

    "But hang on, how did you know I''m his son?" questioned Usopp, looking at Luffy with confusion. The rubber man gave him a look, somewhere between exasperated and amused.

    "When your dad got drunk, he couldn''t shut up about you. He''d show your picture to everyone in sight, bragging about his son. It was really annoying," stated Luffy, before taking a big swig of juice.

    "Really, my dad¡­ Talked about me? He didn''t¡­ forget?" Usopp questioned, in a small voice. That was one of his biggest fears, that his dad left and forgot about him completely. But now this guy was telling him he not only remembered, but he actively bragged about him.

    Support creative writers by reading their stories on Royal Road, not stolen versions.

    Could it really be true?

    Luffy gave Usopp a soft smile, as the others looked on, feeling pity for the young man. It must have been hard, growing up and wondering if you were abandoned. They couldn''t imagine that.

    Especially Nami, who''s own adopted mother gave her life to save her and Nojiko. She would always regret that argument she had with her, the day she died. But she never thought, never questioned, in all this time, whether or not her mother loved her.

    Nick thought back to his own dad, and his notion of ''tough love''. His words were always harsh, and he was a stern man who showed little emotion, but even then, Nick never thought the man would abandon him. Even if he wished he would sometimes.

    "Nope, he didn''t forget about you. Not for a single day. He''s spoken about you so much, I feel like I already know you," said Luffy.

    Usopp looked ready to cry at any moment, but he did his best to hold it in. He didn''t want to appear weak in front of them.

    "Hey, Usopp?" Nick said, looking at the long nosed liar. He was very similar to his anime counterpart, with the same nose, tan skin, durag, and overalls. But one thing that was different, was he seemed way more muscular than before. Nick remembered he looked like a string bean in the show, but here, dude looked like he hit the gym.

    "Uh, yeah? What is it?" he responded, turning toward Nick. He was still fairly emotional about the whole reveal about his dad, but at the same time was relieved for the distraction.

    "I was just wondering, where is everybody?" he asked. It was something he noticed as they walked through town. There was hardly anyone out and about. It was almost like a ghost town. Not as bad as Orange Town, but it was still noticeable.

    It was like the whole town was on edge.

    "W-what do you mean?" Usopp responded. There was more than a little sweat coming down his face, as he nervously looked around. He was definitely hiding something.

    "I mean, as we were walking through town, there was hardly anyone outside. Is something going on here? Does it have something to do with the piles of scrap wood on the beach?" Nick questioned further.

    He knew in the anime the butler was planning on stealing Kaya''s inheritance or something, but no one in town should know anything about that. So there had to be something else going on.

    "You know, I was wondering the same thing," said Nami. The others looked curious as well, staring at Usopp waiting for answers. The poor man looked even more jumpy at the mention of the wood.

    Akisu next to him was looking similarly nervous, as he ate his fresh pancakes. Something was definitely going on.

    "I-I don''t know what you''re talking about, everything is fine," Usopp tried to lie again. But it seems even Luffy didn''t believe this one.

    Come to think of it, did they ever tell him Usopp was lying before? Nick wasn''t sure. It''s entirely possible he still believes that Usopp has a million men under his control.

    "You don''t seem too sure about that," said Nami, resting her head in her hand. Usopp''s twitchy energy transformed into anger as he gave them an irritable glare.

    "I''m telling you it''s nothing. So just drop it!"

    "Methinks thou doth protest too much," thought Nick, staring at the angry young man. At this rate, he wouldn''t reveal anything. If Nick had to guess, it was coming from a place of pride. No one wants to admit when they can''t do something on their own.

    "Anyway, I''m more curious about you. What''s a bunch of Buggy pirates doing here in the first place, huh? And what about that weird power of yours? Don''t think I forgot," Usopp accused, his last question directed squarely at Luffy.

    Even Akisu was looking at them with suspicion once again, though the glare he leveled was somewhat diminished by the syrup on his face.

    Luffy and Zoro shared a look, "What are you talking about, we''re not with that clown," said Luffy, confused. Zoro looked affronted by the accusation.

    "Don''t lie! I saw the symbol on your boat. I know who that belongs to," Usopp said. And he did it with such confidence too, Nick almost felt bad about popping his bubble.

    "Oh that? Nami and I stole that from some of his crew," he told him.

    "Ugh, don''t remind me," Nami said with a shudder. She could still feel those creeps staring at her with those lustful gazes. It wasn''t an uncommon occurrence either, everywhere she goes she receives those kinds of looks. Just another thing the beautiful had to deal with.

    "Huh?" Usopp questioned, deflating. "So, you guys aren''t pirates after all?" And he was so sure they were too, after that speech he was given earlier. Was he wrong? Were they just pretending, like he was?

    "I didn''t say that," responded Nick.

    "Will you make up your mind already!?" shouted Usopp. Were they just making fun of him?

    "Listen, we are pirates, we just aren''t with Buggy. Got it?" Zoro told him with a glare. All the shouting was making it hard to enjoy his booze.

    "But that still doesn''t explain why you''re here or your powers," said Usopp. Even if they weren''t with the clown, something he was sure Onion could be happy about at the very least, they had to be here for a reason.

    "Oh that. I ate the Gum-Gum Fruit, see?" started Luffy, who proceeded to stretch his face as far as it would go. Usopp and Akisu watched with morbid fascination, expecting his cheek to rip off at any moment.

    "And now, I''m a rubber man," he finished, allowing his cheek to snap back into place. He gave them a massive grin, as they stared in slack jawed disbelief.

    "Hang on a second¡­ Are you saying Devil Fruits are real!?" yelled Usopp, as Akisu''s eyes widened at the realization. Sure, they''ve heard of them before, as the sailor''s who come by brought wild stories with them. And a few of their shipwrights were actually from the Grand Line, and the stories they told were even wilder than the sailors.

    But they''ve never actually seen one before, or somebody who''s eaten one. This was nuts! No wonder he couldn''t hurt him with a pachinko ball.

    "And as for why we''re here, we''re actually looking for a ship," said Nami. That caught Usopp''s attention, as he gave her a surprised look. "A ship, huh?" he said.

    "But not just any ship," said Luffy, with a mouth full of food, fantasizing about his future vessel. "One that''s big, but not too big, with lots of cannons."

    "Don''t forget the fire breathing figurehead," commented Nick.

    "Oh yeah, and that!"

    Usopp stared at the happily daydreaming boy with a look of disbelief. "You''re not serious about that last part are you?" he questioned. Didn''t he know what a fire hazard that was? Did eating a Devil Fruit make one completely insane?

    When Luffy didn''t answer and just kept on daydreaming, he turned to face the others, "He''s not serious is he?"

    "Unfortunately he is," said Nami with a sigh. Usopp could only stare in shock. As someone who worked on the ships, he could very easily confirm that what he wanted was impossible. Or at the very least, impossible for them.

    He''s heard about the shipwrights from a place called Water 7, as one of their workers was actually from there, and they could probably do what he wanted. Usopp wasn''t sure he believed the man when he said how good they were, but that would be their best bet.

    "So anyway, do you think you can show us where they sell the ships?" asked Nami, which broke Luffy from his daydream. He turned to look at the long nosed man, eagerly waiting for his answer.

    "No, I''m sorry. You''ll have to look elsewhere," he answered, face covered in shadows. The rest of the crew gave each other a look of confusion, and Akisu appeared conflicted.

    "But this is where they make the best ships in the East Blue. Come on, can''t you take us? Pretty please," Nami asked, fluttering her eyes at him. But unlike Nick, who felt his heart skip a beat, it had no effect on Usopp.

    "I said no, so just drop it ok!" he shouted. The room became covered in awkward silence, as nobody knew what to say. He really knew how to kill the mood.

    "H-hey, big bro? Maybe we should-" Akisu started to say, but was interrupted by Usopp.

    "No! We don''t need to involve them," he practically hissed. Akisu shrank back at the reprimand, with tears in his eyes.

    "Hey, you don''t have to be so mean to him. What''s your problem?" said Nami angrily. The others stared at him with similar looks of disappointment and anger. Even Zoro, who was still sore about the whole busted testicle thing, looked peeved.

    Usopp stared at the teary eyed youth, before letting out a sigh, "You''re right. Sorry Akisu."

    The kid used his sleeve to wipe the tears from his eyes before looking back at him, "It''s alright."

    Usopp gave him a smile, before his face hardened again as he looked at the rest of them, "Look, I''ll pay for your food. But once you''re finished, I want you to leave. Got it?"

    "Just who do you think you are?" asked Nami, her face set in a scowl. She was starting to get fed up with this guy''s attitude, and hell hath no fury like a Nami scorned.

    Without giving an answer, Usopp stood up, "Look, I have someplace I need to be. Thanks for telling me about my dad, but I still want you out of here."

    Nick didn''t remember Usopp being this insufferable. Sure he was a whiny, annoying coward at the best of times, but right now, he just wanted to punch the guy in the face.

    Without waiting for an answer, Usopp turned around and left, with Akisu chasing after him. The rest of them sat in silence, staring in the direction he left.

    "Well, that was fun," stated Nick sarcastically, taking a swig of the good stuff. He didn''t particularly like the taste of beer, but for some reason, the stuff sure hit the spot. Maybe it was just because it was an anime world? Who knows.

    "Argh, can you believe that guy!? What a jerk!" Nami growled, before she too downed the hatch. But unlike Nick, she chugged the whole damn pint. It was probably a good thing she had such high alcohol tolerance, otherwise they might have had to carry her out of there.

    Come to think of it, wasn''t she like, 18? Nick was pretty sure that was the case, so was it even legal for her to drink? Not that it mattered much, considering they were criminals, but he still had to wonder if there was a legal drinking age.

    "So, what''s the call Luffy?" asked Zoro. He didn''t really care one way or the other, but he would be slightly upset if he had to go through the pain and humiliation he did, only to end up with nothing to show for it.

    "You can''t be thinking of leaving, can you?" questioned Nami. She needed to show that little twerp who the boss is.

    Luffy just continued to stare after Usopp, a blank look adorning his face. After several seconds, he finally responded, "We''re staying. We came here for a ship, and we''re not leaving without one.''

    The others smirked at that, happy with that decision. Especially Nick, who didn''t want to leave the island without the Going Merry. Just the thought of getting to sail on that ship was giving him goosebumps.

    "Alright, if we plan to stay, then we''ll need to do a bit of investigating," said Nick, as the others turned their attention to him. "Somethings going on here, and we should find out what. It may provide us an opportunity to get a ship."

    They looked a bit contemplative at that, mulling the idea over in their head. Zoro gave a snort of amusement, "A pirate playing detective now? What''s next, joining the Marines?"

    "Naw, Luffy doesn''t like the coat, remember? Besides, I doubt he would do well following their orders," Nick said with a grin of his own.

    "You have a point there," Zoro responded with a chuckle.

    "That''s great and all, and I hate to break up this touching male bonding moment, truly I do, but if we''re going to investigate, where exactly are we supposed to start?" asked Nami. She was just as eager to figure out what was going on, even if her motivation at the moment was getting back at Usopp.

    "You know, we wouldn''t have to investigate anything if you were any good at seducing people. Well, except for that moron," Zoro said, gesturing to Nick. The brown haired man just shrugged his shoulders in response. He could refute the claim, but they''d all know it was a lie. He was most definitely seduced.

    "What did you say? I can seduce anyone I want. I happen to be an extremely beautiful woman you know," she growled at the green haired swordsman.

    "Sure you want to say that in front of your boyfriend?" Zoro said with a smirk. Nami''s face took on a red hue at the accusation.

    "He is not my boyfriend! He''s my servant until such a time as his debt is repaid," she denied.

    "Love you too Nami," Nick said with a roll of his eyes.

    "You shut it!"

    *Line Break*

    Usopp glared ahead as he walked down the dirt road, angrily kicking a can out of the way. He stopped as it went skidding ahead, letting out a frustrated sigh.

    Why did he do that? Why did he not tell them they needed help? Why did he have to be so damn stubborn? Oh well, it was too late now. He''d just have to make sure to take care of it before it got any worse.

    "Hey! Wait up!" shouted a voice behind him. Usopp turned to see who was shouting, only to be surprised when it turned out to be Akisu. His young ward ran up to him before stopping, huffing and puffing.

    "Aksu, what are you doing here?" Usopp asked. He figured he''d still be eating or going off to spend time with his friends.

    When Akisu finally managed to get his breathing under control, he pointed angrily at his big brother, "What was that about!? Why didn''t you ask those guys for help!?"

    It was Usopp''s turn to be angry, "You just don''t get it! There are some things a man can and can''t do, and asking someone to solve your problems for you is something a man can''t do."

    "What? That''s stupid. When I need help, I ask for it. I think you''re just being stubborn."

    The two continued to glare at each other, before Usopp relented with a sigh. He really didn''t like to fight with his little brother.

    "Well, you might be right," he conceded, "But it''s too late now. We''ll just have to handle it on our own."

    "Uh huh, sure. That would be more convincing if your knees weren''t shaking," Akisu pointed out.

    "That''s just from excitement! They can''t wait to take on those dastardly pirates," Usopp defended.

    "You''re such a liar," Akisu said with exasperated fondness. "Speaking of lying, you''re going to see Kaya, aren''t you?"

    "You don''t have to put it that way you know," he stated with a blank look. "But I am. You want to come with?"

    "Sure!" Akisu said excitedly. It''s been awhile since he''s seen her, and he was worried about her condition. He doubted she''s gotten any better with everything going on too.

    "So what story do you think we should tell her today?" asked Usopp, picking up Akisu and placing him on his shoulders. He seemed to think about it for a moment, before his eyes lit up, "Ooh, I know! How about the one with the giant goldfish?"

    "You mean the one with the super humongous poop?" Usopp asked, looking up at his little brother. The young boy grinned down at him, and nodded, "Yeah!"

    "Sounds good to me. Girls like stories about poop, right?" asked Usopp, as the two of them made their way towards the giant mansion on a hill.

    "I don''t see why not," Akisu responded.

 Chapter 16

    "I got nothing to say to you. Now scram!"

    With that rather rude statement, Nick found a door slammed into his face. He sighed as he walked away from the house. It was the fifth one so far that wanted nothing to do with him.

    Turns out, no one wanted anything to do with the strange newcomers asking questions. Go figure. They all gave him suspicious looks, glaring at him like he did something wrong.

    He supposed that depended on who you asked. The Marines would certainly say he was in the wrong a time or two. So would Buggy for that matter. But they were both assholes, so who cares what they think.

    As Nick reached the dirt road, he looked around the quiet town. It was rather peaceful, or at least appeared to be, with rolling hills in the distance and a nice breeze blowing through the empty streets. If it wasn''t for whatever was going on, he would say it was a nice place to live.

    He hoped the others were doing better than he was. After leaving the restaurant, the four of them decided to split up and search the town. They figured it would be easier to find info that way.

    Oh how wrong they were. Not a single damn person was willing to speak up. He almost thought he had something earlier when an old lady thought he was her grandson, but that just turned into 15 minutes of nonsense. She spoke about everything except the current situation.

    He escaped as soon as he could. He did feel a bit bad, considering she was still babbling about something, but he had things to do, no matter how lonely she was.

    But was there any point? No one was willing to say anything, which did and didn''t make sense. He could understand not trusting a stranger, but if there was someone willing to help, why not at least tell them what the problem was?

    Stupid, stubborn townies.

    So Nick continued on his not so merry way, trying to get some kind of info. It would be really sad if he couldn''t get anything at all, considering it was his idea.

    Walking down the road, Nick spotted a peculiar sight. It looked like a sleeping pile of moss resting against a fence. And what was even stranger about it, was that the moss looked a lot like Zoro.

    Stopping in front of the sleeping mass, Nick could only stare at it in confusion. It sure looked like Zoro, but there was no way he would have the nerve to sleep in the middle of the road, when they had work to do. There was just no way¡­

    Right?

    ¡­Yeah, it was totally a sleeping Zoro. Maybe he should go and find a pok¨¦flute to wake him up? After all, he sleeps about as much as a Snorlax. But that would take too long. Better to just give him a good kick.

    Zoro woke with a start as he felt a hard impact on his leg. Looking up through bleary eyes, he cursed when he saw who it was, "What do you want?"

    "Why are you sleeping in the middle of the road?" Nick asked.

    "I''m not in the middle of the road," he responded. Nick''s eye gained a twitch at that. Just because he wasn''t technically in the actual middle of the road, and was off to the side, doesn''t change the fact he was sleeping.

    "You know what I mean. Did you learn anything?" Nick asked. Zoro leaned back against the fence, "What do you think?"

    "I see," Nick said, as he leaned against the fence himself. Strike two! If neither of the other two learned anything, then this game would end up a blowout. He didn''t have much hope for Luffy, if he was honest, but Nami, with her overwhelming sex appeal, should be able to coerce some info no problem.

    They were supposed to meet back at the restaurant after an hour, so they still had about 10 minutes, give or take, so he might as well try a few more places until then. Didn''t want to end up a lazy lout like Zoro.

    "Well, I''m going to go see if I can get anything. Don''t be late to the meetup," Nick said, only receiving a grunt in response. Zoro was back asleep before he was ten feet away. Seriously, was he narcoleptic or something?

    Walking down the road once more, Nick found himself in another part of town, similar to the rest. But this part seemed more dedicated to buying and selling goods. Various stalls lined the street, however, all of them were empty.

    All except one.

    He could see a young man around his age, with tools scattered around him. If Nick had to guess, he was trying to fix the stall up. Makes sense, if you can''t sell anything because no one was around, might as well get the stall ready for when you could.

    But that wasn''t the main thing that drew his attention. No, that belonged to the beautiful woman talking to him. She was leaning against the stall counter talking to the guy, her perky ass swaying hypnotically in the breeze.

    Not again! His mind was going blank. The power of booty was too strong. He couldn''t resist.

    "Oh come on, you can tell me," he heard her say in a flirtatious manner. That snapped him out from under the hypnotic spell of the ass. Phew¡­ that was a close one.

    He watched as she squeezed his arm, causing him to blush crimson, stuttering some kind of response, "N-no, I can''t. You see, I uh, but¡­"

    That''s when Nami turned it up to eleven, using her free arm to emphasize the size of her bust. If Nick thought the guy''s face was red before, it was nothing compared to now.

    "Please¡­" Nami begged. Nick''s eye gained a twitch again, but for a completely different reason. He knew she would use her feminine wiles to get what she wanted, but seeing it was another matter entirely.

    And it made him jealous.

    His eye twitched uncontrollably as he watched the man behind the stall stare directly at Nami''s cleavage. He understood, he really did, Nami had a rockin'' bod, but it still irritated him.

    The hypocrisy was not lost on him either. At this point, he''s lost count of the times he''s been put under the spell of her breasts, mostly because he tends to black out a bit when it happens.

    The man''s face was completely red by this point, as he tried to stutter out an answer, as Nami continued to give him a coy smile, with a little shake of her hips, and a bounce in her step, he was putty in her hands.

    Before too long, he was unable to bear the weight of her flirting, "L-look, all I know is that the shipyards have been getting attacked. If you want to know more, you should just ask them!"

    Nami beamed at him in response, "Thank you very much!" That might have been the end of it, except she did a little bounce, causing her chest to do the same. This was more than the man could take, as steam erupted from his face and he passed out.

    Well, at least he wasn''t one of the handsy ones. If he was, Nick was fully prepared to break both of his legs.

    And then his arms.

    And then whatever was left.

    Not like it would be the first time he''s killed someone for the same reason. And that guy only threatened to do it. Too bad Buggy and his band of assholes took his guns and sword away. Now he needed to steal it from someone else.

    Maybe there were some more Marines nearby? He could even get the others some fancy new coats!

    Nami turned around with a satisfied look on her face, having finally been able to get the information she wanted. Well, not all of it, but she knew where to go look. Honestly, it should have been the first place they checked, in retrospect, but oh well.

    She was a bit surprised to see Nick standing there, a sour look on his face. His arms were crossed over his chest, and he looked just as grumpy as a certain swordsman. It didn''t suit him.

    "Hey Nick, what''s got you in such a mood?" she asked, walking up to him. He huffed and turned around, confusing her even more.

    "Nothing, nothing at all. I don''t care that you were flirting with that guy. Not at all," he said, his tsundere side bursting through like the goddamn kool-aid man.

    Nami just blinked at him in confusion for a moment, before a big, cheshire grin lit up her face. Oh this was too good. "Oh I see, you were jealous. How cute," she teased.

    Now it was Nick''s turn to have his face turn red, as he vehemently denied the accusation, "I am not! What reason do I have to be jealous of that guy, huh? None, that''s right! None at all!"

    "I see¡­ So I guess you wouldn''t care if he and I got to know each other a little better then, right?" she asked, practically cooing the question. She was enjoying seeing this side of him, considering his normal, slightly pervy behavior.

    Don''t think she didn''t notice all the times he stared at her. Hell, she would even pose when she noticed sometimes, making sure to emphasize her sublime figure. The blank, dopey eyed look he would get was a great source of entertainment.

    Not to mention how it stroked her ego.

    Nick made a sound between a gag and a squeak. The thought of her and some other guy, together, was enough to drive him off a cliff. Luckily, the whole island was surrounded by them, so he had his pick of the litter, so to speak.

    But he couldn''t tell her that. "Of course not. You can do whatever you want. See if I care."

    With that said, he turned around and started back the way he came. It was time to return to check in anyway and see if Luffy found out anything. And he also needed to wake up Sleeping Beauty and drag him along.

    "Ah come on, don''t be like that," Nami said, giggling as she chased after him. Staring at his retreating figure gave her an idea. So with another grin, she promptly leapt onto his back.

    "H-hey, what the hell!?" Nick shouted in surprise, hands instinctively going to hold her legs. It was a good thing she decided to wear shorts instead of a skirt, but he could still feel the silky soft smoothness of her skin.

    That brought up a whole new question. Did they have razors here? They must have, or Nami would look like she was half wookiee, at least from the waist down. And if so, he should probably invest in some, lest he start to look like a wild hillbilly.

    He looked back to see Nami''s smiling face, her eyes lit up with a teasing light. "You know you''re the only servant for me."

    Nick rolled his eyes, "Gee, thanks for the reminder. Glad to know you care so much."

    "You''re welcome!" she responded in a far too chipper voice. She chose to completely ignore the sarcasm dripping from his voice, and instead, wrapped her arms around him harder, pressing her impressive jibblies deeper into his back.

    Nick shivered at the feeling as Nami shouted, "Mush!" pointing forward. He sighed, even as he complied, telling himself he most definitely wasn''t a simp. Maybe if he repeats it enough, he might actually believe it.

    It was a damn good thing she didn''t have an Only Fans account.

    The two of them continued onward, Nami and her trusty steed, Nicholas. "So, did you at least get some info out of the guy?" asked the steed, his voice holding no jealousy at at. Seriously, none.

    "A bit," Nami said with a sigh, placing her chin on his head, "But he only told me where I can find the info I need, he didn''t actually share much else."

    This novel''s true home is a different platform. Support the author by finding it there.

    "Well, that''s better than what I got," he comforted. "Everyone I met just shut the door in my face and called me names. Except for this one old lady, she was nice."

    Nami raised an eyebrow at this with another smirk on her face, "Oh, should I be worried someone is trying to steal away my precious little servant?"

    "Well, she did make one hell of a snickerdoodle," Nick joked. Nami poked him in the cheek, a small glare on her face, "Is that all it takes? I''ll have you know I''m pretty good in the kitchen."

    "Now who''s jealous?" Nick asked. He didn''t remember Nami cooking in the show, but for some reason, he doubted her culinary skills. Not that he would tell her that, of course. He likes his testicles right where they are, thank you very much.

    "I am not!"

    Before long, they made it back to Sleeping Beauty. However, it seems like a dwarf has come to play. The two of them stopped, or more accurately, Nick stopped, and they watched as Luffy drew on Zoro''s face with a marker, snickering the whole time.

    That guy could not catch a break, could he?

    "Luffy, what are you doing?" asked Nick. Don''t get him wrong, he knew what he was doing, he just didn''t know why. Shits and giggles most likely, considering he was, in fact, giggling. The bigger question was, where did he get that marker?

    The rubber man jumped a bit at the sound of Nick''s voice, turning to see them staring at him in confusion. And a fair amount of amusement, especially from Nami. He stood up and casual as can be, hid the marker behind his back.

    "Oh hey Nick, hey Nami. What''s up?" he asked, pretending like he didn''t do anything wrong. The two of them were even more confused that he could actually believe they didn''t notice what he was doing.

    That innocent act wasn''t fooling anyone.

    "Not much, we were just heading back to the meeting spot. What about you? Practicing your artwork?" Nick asked, gesturing toward the still sleeping Zoro. Guy did not have a care in the world.

    Luffy looked back at his sleeping crewmate, admiring his not so secret handy work. It looked like Zoro was wearing glasses, with a swirly mustache and a goatee.

    "He was like that when I got here," claimed Luffy, lying through his rubber teeth. He tried whistling to prove his innocence, but considering it sounded more like he was blowing on hot food, trying to cool it down, made it less than convincing.

    "Whatever. Since you''re here, why don''t you wake him up, and we can go over what we learned," Nick said. Luffy seemed relieved he wasn''t being called out for his obvious fib, as he turned around to do just that.

    "Wait," said Nami, making Luffy halt in his endeavor. He and Nick looked at Nami in confusion wondering what the hold up could be.

    "Put me down," she commanded Nick, who did so with a shrug, not so secretly missing the warmth of her body against his, but trying to play it cool. There were a couple of other reasons for his disappointment, large, bouncy reasons, but they weren''t important.

    Nami walked over to Luffy and held out her hand, "Gimme. I want in on this." Luffy appeared befuddled for a moment, before his eyes lit up in realization. With a massive grin, made even bigger by the fact his face was made of rubber, he handed Nami the marker he got from who knows where.

    Nami had a matching grin on her face, as Nick sighed at their childishness. It was hard being the grown up of the group. Such a thought would be more believable if he wasn''t also grinning.

    Nami sauntered her way over to the sleeping swordsman, an eager sway in her hips. With a mischievous light in her eyes, she proceeded to mark the poor man''s face as well.

    Zoro was now sporting cat whiskers on both cheeks, and the tip of his nose was completely black. All in all, he had the appearance of a rather dapper cat.

    Seeing this, Luffy couldn''t help but burst out laughing. He fell onto his back, holding his gut in laughter. Nami and Nick were also chuckling, though nowhere near as loud. The obnoxious laughing did have the added effect of waking Sleeping Beauty. Seeing this, Nami quickly disposed of the evidence, by chucking the marker into the field behind her.

    Zoro looked around blearily before giving a big yawn and stretching his arms. "Do you have to be so loud? I was having a good nap," He groused, glaring at the three of them, but especially Luffy.

    "And what''s so damn funny?"

    That caused Luffy to stop laughing and stare at Zoro. It didn''t last long, and soon enough, he was laughing his rubber ass off again, angering the swordsman further.

    "Ok, I think that''s enough. No need to kill Luffy," Nick said, as Zoro made to strangle his Captain. He doubted he would be able to stop him once he discovered the marking on his face, but for now, they had more important matters to discuss.

    The others stared at him, as Nick crossed his arms in front of his chest, "So what have we learned so far?" he asked. They gave each other a look, before Zoro huffed in anger, leaning back against the fence.

    "Nobody would tell me anything. Bastards just kept slamming the door in my face."

    Nick nodded at that, "Yeah, it was pretty much the same with me. Though I did get some pretty tasty cookies¡­" he trailed off, thinking about the delectable little treats he received. If they survived whatever was happening, he would have to make sure and get some more, and maybe learn the recipe so he could make it himself.

    "What!? Where!? I want some cookies," shouted Luffy, grabbing Nick by his collar, who struggled to get him off. Luffy was stupidly strong for his size.

    "Damn it Luffy, not now! Later, I promise," Nick said, which seemed to appease him, as Luffy let go of his shirt, with a happy grin on his face, imagining the cookies he was going to eat.

    "Ok, but don''t forget, ok?" he said. Nick sighed and nodded in agreement, "Fine, fine I won''t. Now, did you learn anything?"

    "Nope!" Luffy responded, far too happily for someone who failed. The rest of them gave him exasperated looks, as Luffy continued to smile, not knowing what the problem was.

    "You boys are helpless," Nami said with an exaggerated sigh. Zoro gained a tick mark as he glared at her, "Oh yeah? And what did you learn that''s got you so high and mighty?"

    Nami gave him a condescending smirk, which only stoked his ire even further, "Apparently, someone has been attacking the shipyard, so if we want some more info, that''s where we need to go."

    "Tsk, that''s it? That''s what you''re so proud of?" Zoro questioned.

    "It''s more than what you found out!" she shouted back.

    Nick sighed and Luffy laughed as they began to argue. It was going to be a long day, wasn''t it?

    After Nami and Zoro finally stopped their little spat, the group quickly made their way to the shipyard, without any surprises. He half expected some assassins to pop out of nowhere, ready to kill them for asking too many questions.

    Thankfully, that didn''t happen.

    The shipyard itself was fairly busy, especially compared to the rest of town. Dozens of workers could be seen throughout the area, working on this or that, repairing damaged vessels.

    It was obvious they had been attacked. Nick didn''t know why Usopp bothered to try and hide the fact that something was wrong. Sure it took them a bit, but they eventually came to the shipyards, and once there, it was impossible to hide the fact something was going on.

    He still felt stupid for not just heading here in the first place.

    Regardless, now they needed to find someone who was willing to spill the beans. If only they could keep Luffy on track.

    Of course, that was like asking the sun to stop shining.

    "Whoa! Look at that one! It''s huge!" Luffy shouted with glee. He looked just like a kid in a candy store, eyes roaring over everything in sight, never staying in one spot for very long, unable to decide what he wanted more.

    Not that Nick could blame him, but there was only one ship he wanted to see.

    Luffy then decided it was a good idea to run off, yelling excitedly. "Wait, Luffy!" shouted Nami, but it fell on deaf ears. With a huff, she crossed her arms over her chest and glared at where Luffy disappeared to.

    "Honestly, can''t he sit still for five minutes?" she questioned. The obvious answer was no, but Nick thought it was better not to mention that.

    "It''s Luffy," Zoro responded, like that explained everything. To his credit, it kind of did.

    "Whatever, let''s just see if we can find someone to help us," Nami suggested, as the three of them made their way further into the shipyard. But before they got too far in, Zoro stopped, looking over to his left.

    "You go on ahead, I''ll check over there," he said, before walking off himself.

    "Huh? Wait a second," Nami said, but like his Captain, Zoro wasn''t listening. The pair watched as he made his way over to some workers, who seemed to be on their lunch break, drinking some booze.

    Yeah, that checks out. Though it was probably a good idea to get out of dodge, since it was almost assured that Zoro would be learning about the markings on his face. Nick didn''t want to be within his field of vision when that happened.

    "Are you kidding me?" Nami growled, while Nick gave her a shrug, "It''s Zoro."

    Nami sighed at that, before grabbing Nick''s arm, "Come on!" Left with no other alternative, he allowed the busty beauty to lead him around. He didn''t want her ire pointed at him, no siree.

    The pair continued on, asking several workers about the shipyard, but none of them seemed willing to answer. They gave them suspicious looks, before telling them to beat it, as they were busy.

    Not even Nami''s bangin'' badonkers convinced anyone to open up. They were made of much sterner stuff than that guy at the stall.

    "Ugh, are you kidding me!? Why won''t they say anything?" she questioned as the pair decided to take a break. They watched as the workers went about their business. It was honestly impressive how they were able to work so fast and efficiently. But that didn''t help them at all at the moment.

    "Guess I can''t really blame them. Two strangers asking questions? Seems pretty suspicious to me," Nick said, leaning up against a tree as Nami sat in a branch slightly above him.

    "I guess¡­" she sighed. She was more irritated by the fact that her feminine wiles seemed to fail her when she needed them the most. It was a hit to her pride as a woman.

    After a few minutes of people watching, Nick noticed something odd, "Hey, is that Luffy?"

    Nami looked to where he was pointing, and sure enough, there he was, stretching his arms out and grabbing the railing of a ship.

    "What is he doing now?" Nami asked, exasperated. Five minutes. Could he not go five minutes without causing a scene?

    And didn''t she ask a similar question not too long ago? Was that her life now?

    They watched as Luffy went flying into the sky, landing in the ship''s crows nest. The two shared a look, "Should we¡­?" Nick asked, leaving the question open. But Nami knew what he meant.

    "Yeah, better make sure he doesn''t cause even more damage," she responded. With that said, she jumped out of the tree, and the two of them made their way towards their troublemaking Captain.

    Luffy grinned as he stared at all the people down below. They looked like ants from up here. Really big ants, but still ants. He placed his hand over his eyes to block the sun, and stared out at all the ships. The one he was on was the biggest, but for some reason, it didn''t feel right.

    "Hey, what the hell do you think you''re doing?" questioned a voice below him. Luffy shifted his gaze below him and saw an older man, with broad shoulders, glaring up at him.

    "Get down from there you idjit! ''Fore you hurt yourself! Or worse, my ship!"

    Luffy shrugged before hopping down onto the deck of the ship, landing right in front of the older man in a crouch. He stood up and grinned at the man, who glared right back.

    "So, mind telling me just what in the hell you were thinking?" he asked. Luffy stared at the large man, taking in his appearance. His muscles were huge, bulging out in every direction. He wore a plain white shirt, covered in dirt, and basic blue pants. A large, bushy beard covered his face, and Luffy could see a jagged scar poking out of the beard on the left side of his face.

    But that wasn''t the thing that drew Luffy''s attention. No, that was due to the man''s hair. It went straight up, tied by a scrunchie of some kind, and looked very similar to a palm tree.

    "You got some crazy hair, old guy," Luffy said with a laugh. Said ''old guy'' gained a tick mark, before he struck Luffy on the head with one of his big, meaty fists.

    "Ow, what was that for," Luffy whined.

    "For being a brat, that''s what! Now tell me, what are you doing on my ship!? I won''t ask again," he threatened.

    "I just wanted to check it out, you don''t have to be such a jerk about it," Luffy complained, further irritating the man.

    "You can check it out from the shore! Now get out of here you brat, I''m busy," he said. Luffy watched as the man walked away, inspecting some parts of the ship. Luffy noticed the spots he was checking seemed to be a slightly different color of wood.

    "Something happen here, old guy?" Luffy asked, coming up behind him. The man looked behind him, "You still here? Thought I told you to leave. And my name''s not old guy, it''s Pett," he said with a huff.

    "Shishishi, nice to meet you, I''m Luffy."

    "Did I ask for your damn name? What are you still doing here?" he asked. Luffy placed his hands behind his head, still grinning at the irritated Pett, "I''m here looking for a ship."

    "That right? Well too bad, none of these here ships are ready for sale," Pett explained.

    Luffy looked around in confusion, "How come? They look pretty awesome to me," he asked. Pett sighed, turning to face Luffy fully, "Look kid, it''s none of your business. They ain''t ready, simple as that."

    Luffy watched the man walk away to inspect more of the ship. From his perspective, the man named Pett looked pretty upset. Downright furious, actually.

    "So, did you build this ship, old guy?" Luffy asked, walking behind as Pett continued his inspection.

    "I told you, my name''s not old guy. And yeah, I built and designed this here beauty. It might not be as good as the folks back in Water 7, but I''m damn proud of her," Pett said, gently tracing his hands over the wooden railing.

    Luffy grinned back at him, "That''s awesome old guy. You ever think of joining a pirate crew?" Seeing how much this guy cared about his ship made Luffy want him on the crew. He was exactly the kind of person he was looking for.

    And his hair was awesome!

    Pett turned to look at him with narrowed eyes, "Pirate, huh? Don''t tell me you''re a pirate?" he asked, hands balling into a fist.

    "Yep. And someday, I''m going to King of the Pirates," Luffy proclaimed. This caused Pett to snort, his hands releasing their tension.

    "King of the Pirates? A snot-nosed brat like you? Don''t make me laugh," Pett said derisively.

    "Go ahead, laugh all you want, I don''t care," Luffy said, hand on his head, his eyes shadowed by the brim of his hat. He lifted his gaze to stare right into Pett''s eyes, "But no matter what, I will become King of the Pirates."

    Pett stared at the young man in front of him with a feeling of astonishment. It reminded him of that man, Gold Roger himself. He only saw the man once, long ago, when he showed up at Water 7 looking for a ship. The feeling the man gave, something indescribable, was the same one he got from this kid.

    "What did you say your name was again?" he asked. He knew he should be wary around a pirate, especially now, but for some reason he felt the kid was trustworthy. Something in his gut told him he was someone who would reshape the world.

    Just like Roger.

    Luffy opened his mouth to answer him, but a familiar female voice interrupted him, "Luffy! What are you doing?"

    Looking over at the shore, the pair of them saw a beautiful ginger-haired bombshell staring at them, looking rather displeased. Standing next to her was a brown-haired man with a muscular physique, who looked amused by the whole thing.

    "Hey Nami! Hey Nick! What are you guys doing here!?" Luffy shouted back with a happy wave.

    "I could ask you the same thing!?" Nami shouted back, while Nick returned his wave with a jaunty one of his own, earning him a side glare from Nami for his trouble.

    "Friends of yours?" asked Pett, eying the group with interest. They certainly didn''t seem like your typical bloodthirsty pirates, except for maybe the angry woman. No, the three of them looked like they were seeking something besides just treasure.

    Adventure¡­

    Freedom¡­

    Dreams¡­

    It''s been an awful long time since he''s seen people like them, let alone pirates. Perhaps they could help them. Not like they had much to lose at this point. If something wasn''t done, and soon, a lot of people would be out of work, or worse. Not to mention the toll it was taking on the kind young woman who owned it all.

    Making a decision, he interrupted the three of them, who had descended into light hearted bickering. "Alright you two, come aboard!"

    The three of them looked toward the man who interrupted them with confusion. He let out a sigh, hoping he wasn''t about to make a terrible decision. And yet, it was also hope that made him want to confide in them. What a strange feeling.

    "Let old Pett tell you everything."

 Chapter 17

    Nick stared at the large man in front of him with some disbelief. You couldn''t blame the poor guy for his reaction. To him, Pett looked like somebody crossbred a Pianta from Mario with one of those buff guy''s from Dragon Quest.

    It really threw him for a loop. So much so he nearly missed the beginning of his story. Can''t have that now, he needed to know what was going on, and what has changed. He stood beside Nami and Luffy as Pett began to speak.

    "It all started ''bout a month ago. Everything was normal, and we had just completed an order for a rather large ship. But then, that evening, there was a terrible noise. So loud it darn near woke up the whole island."

    "We all rushed here quick as we could, but it was too late. That newly finished beauty was up in flames. It was all we could do to watch her sink," Pett said, his eyes gaining a misty quality. Just thinking about the damage done to one of his precious babies brought tears to his eyes.

    "So, someone set off a bomb and destroyed one of your ships?" asked Nami, wanting to clarify. She didn''t understand why someone would do that. Revenge, maybe?

    "That''s right," Pett said, blowing into a handkerchief he pulled out of his back pocket. Poor old guy was really taking it hard. Luffy stared at his new friend with blank eyes, but one could tell he was simmering underneath.

    "Anyway, if that were the end of it, we could have simply moved on. Built a new one. But that was only the beginnin''. It seems like everytime we were about to finish a project, somethin'' would come along and destroy all our hard work."

    Nick frowned at the story. It definitely differed from the plot he knew, the question is, why? He hasn''t even been here a month. Hell, he hasn''t even been here two weeks, so whatever was going on here had nothing to do with him.

    It was like Zoro''s swords all over again. He was definitely in some kind of alternate version of the One Piece story he knew. Great, that made his already spotty knowledge damn near worthless.

    "Now, it seems like all we do is repair the damage already done. If this keeps up for much longer, ain''t nobody gonna be purchasin'' none of these here ships," Pett finished, placing his dirty handkerchief back into his pocket, making Nami and Nick crinkle their noses in disgust.

    The darn thing was practically dripping wet from the snot. At that point, it was better to just throw it out or put it somewhere else. Anywhere else but his pocket.

    "So that''s it huh? Has anybody asked for anything? Like ''give me a million Beris and I''ll stop the attack''. Anything like that?" asked Nami. If they weren''t trying to get anything out of the attacks, then it was just senseless violence.

    Although, if they were trying to extort money from the person who owned the shipyards, that would be an act of terrorism. Nami wasn''t sure which one was worse, but either way, it was likely pirates who were involved. Only they would stoop so low.

    "Can''t say that they have," answered Pett, with a miserable sigh. A far cry from the ornery old man from just minutes ago. "And Kaya, that poor young woman, has been beside herself with worry. She hasn''t been down to the docks in two whole weeks. Seeing that pretty face o'' hers always got the boys motivated. Made them work twice as hard it did."

    Nami rolled her eyes at that. Of course a bunch of sweaty sailors would try to show off for a pretty face. "And who is this Kaya person?" she asked. She sounded like somebody important, somebody they needed to talk to about getting a ship.

    If they even could, that is.

    "Kaya''s the one what owns these here shipyards. Or she will, soon as she comes of age. Parents left her everything after they died about a year ago now," Pett answered.

    That part checks out. It was the same, or at least similar to what Nick remembered. He was pretty sure they died of some sickness, but he wasn''t positive. The butler claimed he didn''t do it, but the odds were about 50/50 on that. A coin toss isn''t what Nick would call particularly good odds.

    "That so? Sounds like somebody doesn''t want her to inherit it," Nick commented, making them turn to him. Nami had a contemplative look at that, and by some miracle Luffy was still listening.

    Pett however, just sighed again, "Aye, you''re probably right about that lad. ''Cept, nobody has a clue as to who that could be. Kaya herself is adored by the people ''round here, and her parents were well liked too. Can''t imagine somebody holding a grudge against them folk."

    "Well I can," stated Nami, making them turn towards her now. Luffy and Nick seemed curious about her statement, while Pett seemed a bit angry. When they didn''t seem to understand, she sighed in mild frustration. How could she be the only one who gets it?

    "Listen, from what I understand, the ship building here is the best in the East Blue. So that means they would have had to make some corporate enemies. People they beat out of contracts, or pushed out of business. Somebody like that could easily hold a grudge. And without a demand, it seems more than likely they''re just trying to ruin the business."

    That made them think, and even Pett simmered down, thinking about what she said. It made sense, if you thought about it. No way they became the best around without stepping on a few toes.

    "You may have a point there lass. Never thought of it that way before," Pett said, rubbing his bearded chin. Nick nodded along, though he somehow doubted that would be the case. That butler had to have something to do with it, he just didn''t know what.

    Perhaps his goal was to make her so scared and feel so incompetent, she would hand the business over to him? Perhaps¡­ It made sense, but he had no way of knowing for sure. Hell, he didn''t even know if the butler guy existed, or if he was even the butler.

    He could still be a pirate for all Nick knew. But then, wasn''t capturing him the reason Morgan became a Marine Captain in the first place? If so, and he still was a Captain here, then what''s-his-name must have still faked his death, right?

    "I don''t get it," said Luffy, making Nami groan in frustration, and interrupting Nick''s train of thought. It was better for him not to think too much into it anyway, and just deal with whatever comes his way.

    "Listen, all you need to know is that this Kaya person''s parents made enemies, and they''re likely looking for some revenge," Nami told Luffy. He hit his palm with a fist, an ''ah ha'' expression on his face, making Nami rub her forehead in irritation.

    "So, is that it, or is there something else?" Nick asked, hoping there was a bit more to go on. He needed info, and what he got from Pett was already something he was speculating.

    Pett rubbed his hairy chin in thought for a moment, "Aye, that be about it. I know ye said you were looking fer a ship to call yer own, but it be best you speak to the young lady herself. I''m sure you can negotiate a fair deal with her. She lives up on yonder hill, in the big mansion," said Pett. Nick nodded at that, already hoping to acquire a certain ship for the deed.

    "Sounds good to me. Let''s go get ourselves a ship! Thanks old guy!" Luffy shouted with a laugh, before running to the ship''s edge and jumping off.

    "Luffy, wait!" shouted Nami before chasing after him. Nick sighed and gave Pett a shrug, before starting to take off after his friends. But before he got too far, Pett gave him a warning.

    "Listen lad, you seem like a strong lot. Plenty o'' fire in those bellies of yers. But listen to old Pett, whoever is behind these attacks be dangerous. Best be careful if you plan to offer aid."

    Nick gave him a confident look, "Thanks for the advice, but I think we''ll be fine. We have the future King of the Pirates on our side after all."

    Having said his piece, Nick jumped off the ship and followed the other two. Pett walked to the edge and watched the group leave, with the orange haired girl smacking the ''Future King'' in the head. A small smile worked its way onto his face, before he turned around and went back to work.

    "That you do lad, that you do."

    The three pirates made their way through the shipyard once more, with a new mission. They got all the info they could here, and it was time to head out. Their next objective?

    Convince the rich lady to give them a ship for beating up the bad guys!

    It was a working title, but it described the plan pretty well. Nick was sure they would need to explain it to Luffy another time or two, but that was future Nick''s problem. Current Nick swaggered through the shipyard with a cocky grin on his face. Something Nami picked up on.

    "And just what has you so smug, huh?" she asked. Nick turned to her with the same smarmy look on his face. Actually, it was about 20% more cocky, if that were even possible.

    "Remember on the way here, when I said we''d have to take out some pirates to get a ship?" he asked her. It took Nami a moment to remember, but when she did, her eyes widened.

    The genuine version of this novel can be found on another site. Support the author by reading it there.

    "Wha? But how did you?" she asked, flabbergasted. If he was being honest, he really had no reason to be so cocky, considering his future knowledge, but at the same time, the look on her face was priceless.

    "That''s right, praise me, for I am a genius!" he shouted. Nami rolled her eyes, elbowing him in the ribs, causing him to groan. While he may have been doing pretty good for a guy who was tortured by clowns, he still wasn''t at 100%. More like, 80% if he was being generous, so her elbow hurt more than he would have liked.

    "Good for you Mr. Genius. Would you like a trophy? How about a nice pat on the head?" she asked sarcastically. Nick pretended to think about it for a moment, tapping his chin with a finger.

    "Tempting, tempting¡­ How about reducing my debt instead?"

    "Not a chance."

    Nick shrugged. Oh well, it was worth a shot. Can''t blame a guy for trying. The trio continued on, nearing the end of the shipyard, when Nick suddenly remembered something. Something important.

    "Hey, where''s Zoro?"

    His two companions stopped in their tracks, looking at Nick in confusion. They then looked around the area, before realization dawned on them. They were indeed missing a Zoro.

    "Wasn''t he drinking with some guys?" asked Nami.

    "You mean them?" asked Nick, pointing to the three men currently passed out with drunken smiles on their faces. Looks like Zoro showed them a good time.

    "Yep, that''s them¡­"

    Luffy started to panic, thinking his first crewmate was lost, "Zoro!"

    Meanwhile¡­

    "Damn it, where did those guys run off to? When I get my hands on them¡­" Zoro muttered as he wandered through the shipyard. He was humiliated, utterly and completely.

    After sitting down with the three workers who were on break, he soon discovered he was made the butt of a practical joke. While he was sleeping, someone decided it would be a good idea to draw on his face.

    In permanent marker! And he had a pretty good idea who it was too.

    Luckily, his new drinking buddies took it in good stride, offering him some booze to ease his woes. And who was he to turn them down?

    Unfortunately, for his friends that is, the alcohol in his system only made him angrier. His need for vengeance has never been higher. He would find them, and he would draw on their faces! See how they like it!

    Zoro kept walking with an evil grin on his face, picturing what he would draw on them. Perhaps the words ''Pirate Queen'' for Luffy, ''Greedy Witch'' for Nami, and ''Virgin'' for Nick.

    Yeah that would do. They would never be able to live the humiliation down. Plan set, now all he had to do was find them, which was proving to be a bigger challenge than he thought. The shipyard''s layout was rather confusing, and he felt like he was going in circles.

    "Damn it, where are they?" he groused.

    "What are you doin'' on my ship?" asked a voice to Zoro''s left. He looked over to see who addressed him, only to be met with a large man with a bushy beard and a palm tree hairstyle.

    It was none other than Pett, wondering why there was another person wandering about his workplace. Did somebody put up a sign that said, ''Pett''s ship, strangers welcome!''? Because if they did, old Pett was going to have a word or two with them¡­

    "Ship?" Zoro asked, looking at his surroundings in confusion. Sure enough, he was aboard a large ship, gently bobbing up and down on the water''s surface. How did he get here?

    Pett raised an eyebrow at the man''s confusion, "Yes, a ship. As in a sailing vessel. The thing ye be standing on."

    Zoro sighed in irritation, muttering about why they would put a ship here, which confused Pett even more. Where else would they put a ship besides on the water? Somethin'' wasn''t quite right with this fellow, Pett could feel it in his bones.

    Who just walks around with those markings on their face? Somebody with a screw or two loose, that''s who.

    "If ye ain''t got no business here, kindly take yer leave. I''m busy, if ye couldn''t tell," he said, before turning around and continuing his work. If he kept getting interrupted by youngsters with too much time on their hands, he would never get his work done.

    Zoro tsk''d before doing just that, leaving the boat in a huff. Not like he wanted to be there in the first place, he had better things to do.

    Like kicking some pranksters'' asses.

    Pett sighed in relief as he heard the man leave, thankful there wasn''t a confrontation. While Pett could hold himself in a fight well enough, he didn''t want to risk more damage to his ship. She''s suffered enough in his opinion.

    Not two minutes passed before Pett heard another person step onto his ship. With an angry huff, he turned around to confront whoever it was, only for his eyes to widen as he saw a familiar head of green hair.

    "What the? Why did ye come back? Did ye need something?" he asked befuddled. The man however, looked just as confused as he was, staring at his surroundings in frustration.

    "How did I get back here¡­? Hey, are you following me?" Zoro asked Pett.

    "Following you? We''re on a damn ship you idjit! How in the hell am I supposed to be following you!?" Pett asked, frustrated.

    Zoro growled as he turned around to leave again, only to be stopped by Pett, "Hang on a second there laddy. You seem lost. Do you need some help gettin'' somewhere?"

    While Pett would much rather continue his work, making sure this halfwit left the shipyards was likely in his best interest. Especially if he kept wandering back here somehow.

    "I''m not lost, I''m looking for somebody. You haven''t seen a guy wearing a straw hat have you?" asked Zoro.

    Pett narrowed his eyes in suspicion, "And just who is he to you?"

    "My dumbass Captain," Zoro responded. That caused Pett''s eyes to widen. This guy was part of his crew? Really? Well he guessed it made sense, that Luffy guy was a bit of an oddball as well.

    "I see¡­ In that case, ye should know they were here earlier, but left already, likely heading for the mansion on top of yonder hill. I suggest ye head in that direction," Pett told him. Zoro looked to where he was indicating, and saw a large, palatial mansion almost shimmering on top of a hill overlooking the shipyard.

    "That right? Thanks," Zoro said, before heading off once more. Pett sighed as he watched him go. Good riddance, now he could get back to his job.

    Less than a minute later, Pett heard the now familiar sound of someone walking on the deck of his ship. With a sigh of irritation, exasperation, and a hint of wonder, he turned around and once more saw the swordsman, looking around in confusion.

    "Are ye serious?"

    Back with the others¡­

    The three remaining pirates sat down exhausted, having walked up and down the shipyard, looking for their wayward companion. Luffy and Nami thought they must have just kept missing him, but Nick knew the truth.

    Zoro had an absolutely abysmal sense of direction. There was a good chance he was on the other side of the island by now, sleeping under a tree. It was funny in the show, but now that he had to deal with it, Nick found it just plain irritating.

    The worst part was, he would be dealing with this nonsense for a long, long time. It shouldn''t be possible for someone to have a sense of direction as bad as his, but here they are.

    Nick sighed as he sat down next to Nami, frustrated. Not just at Zoro, but at himself as well. He knew about his sense of direction, or his lack thereof, and should have joined him to prevent such a thing.

    Thinking about it, it was a miracle he found him earlier, taking a nap against the fence. Zoro could have ended up anywhere, literally. Perhaps it was a good thing he has the sleeping tendencies of a cat¡­

    Crap, did he fall asleep somewhere? They searched everywhere, so if he did, it would have to be someplace out of the way. Ugh, the cat found a hidey hole to sleep in, wasn''t that just great¡­

    "There you are," responded a familiar voice, dragging Nick out of his thoughts. The three of them turned to look behind them and sure enough, there stood a familiar green haired swordsman. Luffy appeared relieved to have found him, after a long and grueling search.

    "Zoro, we found you!" shouted Luffy with a happy grin on his face. He stood up and raced towards Zoro.

    "I found you, you dumbass!" Zoro responded, making Luffy chuckle. Nami and Nick also stood up, turning to face the irritated swordsman.

    "It''s about time. Where were you?" Nami asked with her hand on her hip.

    "Looking for you morons. That reminds me, I need to ask you all something¡­" Zoro said. Nick felt a sweat form on his forehead. Zoro''s tone just took a major shift, causing his whole body to tense up.

    He wasn''t the only one to notice it either. Nami took an involuntary step back, gulping at the palpable aura of menace Zoro was exuding. The only one who was oblivious to the danger was none other than Luffy.

    Because of course he was.

    "A-and what would that be, Zoro old pal?" asked Nick. He had a sneaking suspicion what it was about.

    "Well you see¡­ It''s about my face," Zoro started. Nick swore under his breath. It was exactly what he was afraid of.

    "It seems some jokers decided to practice their art skills. You wouldn''t happen to know anything about that, would you?" he finished, and even Luffy was looking nervous now. It seems his survival instinct kicked in at last.

    "I don''t know anything about that¡­" Luffy said, trying and failing to whistle, while also trying and failing to look innocent.

    "Like I''d believe that!" Zoro shouted. Luffy tried to run, but Zoro grabbed him by the back of his vest. His legs and arms kept going, as Luffy tried to run, but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn''t escape Zoro''s grasp.

    "W-well it seems like you caught the perpetrator. But we had nothing to do with it, right Nick?" Nami asked, turning to Nick with a sweet smile on her face. As much as Nick liked Nami, he was perfectly willing to toss her under the bus in this instance.

    "Nope, it was them, all them. Luffy drew the glasses and the mustache and Nami made you look like a cat," he said rapidly. The guilty party didn''t appreciate him tattling on them.

    "You jerk!"

    "That''s it, I''m increasing your debt by 100,000 Beris!"

    Totally worth it.

    "But you still watched them do it, didn''t you? That makes you guilty by association," Zoro said, making Nick freeze. Perhaps he spoke too soon, and he would have three people angry at him instead of just one.

    "Now that''s not true! I only watched Nami draw on you. Luffy was done by the time we got there," Nick corrected. If he thought he was free and clear he had another thing coming. That explanation did nothing to soothe Zoro''s ire towards him.

    "That still makes you guilty!" Zoro yelled. Luffy had yet to give up trying to escape, squirming around in Zoro''s grasp like a greased up hog. He could have just unbuttoned the vest and ran off, but it seems like he hadn''t thought of that.

    And Nick wasn''t going to tell him.

    "Come on, be reasonable¡­" Nick tried as he backed up slowly. Zoro''s eyes gained a glint to them, promising swift and painful retribution.

    "Oh I am. I''ll beat you to a reasonable degree," he threatened.

    Nick gulped audibly, taking another step back. He turned to Nami to ask her a question, "Hey Nami, what should we-Nami?"

    But all he saw was a cloud of dust. Confused, he searched for the wayward navigator, spotting her down the road, running like the devil himself was after her.

    Which wasn''t far from the mark.

    "Sorry, I just remembered I have a hair appointment! Can''t miss it! See you later! Bye!" she shouted, barely glancing over her shoulder. The three men could only stare in disbelief at her retreating figure. None of them had even seen her leave.

    How did she do that? And since when was she so fast?

    Questions for later.

    After a few seconds, Nick seemed to snap out of his trance, "Hey! Nami, wait!" he shouted after her, before he too took off at a sprint.

    "Hey! Nick, don''t leave me!" shouted Luffy. Nick paused his running and turned to face Luffy. For a moment, the rubber man thought Nick would actually stay and try to save him.

    Poor, naive fool.

    Instead, Nick bowed to him in apology, "I will never forget your noble sacrifice," and proceeded to run like hell as well. Mournful tears fell from his eyes as he retreated to the sounds of Luffy''s pleas.

    "Come back!"

    But he didn''t. Nick just kept running. Even as the sound of Luffy''s painful screams entered his ears, he kept running. He only hoped it would be enough.

 Chapter 18

    Zoro stared at the people responsible for humiliating him, his so-called crew, with more than a bit of irritation. Well, one crewmember and two temporary ones. Each of them sat in a seiza position, bowing their heads in apology.

    Luffy had bumps on his head, his face swollen, like he was stung by every bee in the East Blue. Nick and Nami had similar bumps on their heads, but unlike their Captain, that was the extent of it.

    For which they were extremely thankful.

    "So, what do you have to say for yourselves?" asked Zoro, his voice stern, like a parent chastising his children for doing something incredibly stupid. To be fair, he wasn''t far from the mark.

    "We''re sorry," they all said, in very different tones. Nami sniffled, a big crocodile tear falling down her cheek. Luffy could barely speak, and when he did, it came out in a drunken slur. It almost sounded like he developed a speech impediment. And Nick¡­

    Well, he just sounded grumpy. He was being punished for something he didn''t even do. It wasn''t fair at all. Next time, he would draw a big floppy donkey dick on his face. If he was going to be punished either way, might as well earn it.

    Was he being petty and petulant about it? You''re damn right he was! After all, the bump on his head was only the start of it. The three of them were also wearing a matching set of fancy new necklaces made from wood, each of them with writing letting the world know of their crimes.

    I''m an asshole who drew on my friend''s face while he was sleeping.

    That''s what it said. Nick had no idea where he got the damn things, but here they are regardless. Stupid anime logic.

    "Good. And are you going to do it again?" Zoro continued asking.

    "No¡­" they responded again. But what Zoro didn''t know was that each of them had their fingers crossed behind their backs, an evil smirk in their hearts promising retribution.

    None of them knew it then, but history would say this is when the prank wars began.

    "Now that that''s settled, did you at least learn something?" he asked. The three of them perked up at the question, giving a nod.

    "Sure did. It all began when Luffy made a new friend¡­" started Nick.

    Some time later¡­

    "So that''s what''s going on," muttered Zoro, after Nick finished telling the story. He could have done without all the pageantry Nick put into the story, but he had the info now regardless. He heard something similar from the guys he was drinking with, but they passed out before they could explain that much.

    But if that was the case, it certainly made sense why the whole town seemed to be on edge. Pirates attacking the major source of business would worry anybody, let alone regular civilians.

    "That''s right. Now we need to go see this Kaya woman and see if we can make a deal to get a ship," said Nami. She was hoping they could get this over with soon and move on. Sitting on her knees like this for so long was starting to hurt.

    Nami wasn''t a woman who was used to being on her knees.

    Zoro pondered this for a moment. All in all, it wasn''t a bad plan, and it would likely lead them into another fight. For a normal person, that would be seen as a negative, but for someone like Zoro¡­

    "Well then, what are we waiting for?" he asked, turning around and walking off. The three on the ground stared at him for a moment, completely flabbergasted. It wasn''t because of what he said. No, that wasn''t the problem. The real issue was¡­

    "Why is he walking back towards the shipyard?" Nami asked. That wasn''t where they needed to go, that''s where they just were. For what reason could he have for going back there?

    Nick just sighed at this. He''d better go fetch him before he ends up somewhere completely different. If he wandered onto a ship that was leaving town for example, they may never see him again.

    After retrieving the grumpy swordsman, who insisted he knew where he was going, the four of them made their way towards the mansion. Nick wondered if Usopp would be there. That''s most likely where he went after parting ways with them, but that was a couple of hours ago. Could he really keep lying for two hours straight?

    What was he saying, of course he could. He was the world''s premier bull-shitter after all. Nothing less for the crew of the future King of the Pirates!

    Kind of a weird flex, but if you were going to do something, might as well be the best at it. Besides, lying was a great skill to have in Dungeons and Dragons. It got you out of so many problems!

    Or created some¡­ Goddamn nat ones! He shouldn''t be able to fail with a 10 to deception damn it! Hopefully Usopp''s lying didn''t land him in a dungeon.

    Moving on, the four of them reached the massive house. No, it was far too big to be called a house. Hell, it was too big to be called a mansion! But what was bigger than a mansion? A castle? But it wasn''t that either.

    Fuck it, it was a big ass house! No need for Nick to give himself a headache thinking of stupid, useless things like that. There were plenty of stupid, important things to give him a headache.

    Like, how do they get inside the BFH (Big Fucking House) in the first place? They tried the front, only to be chased away by the guards at the gate, and the whole place was surrounded by a massive, ten foot wall.

    It was almost like they didn''t want people to break in or something. But wait, how did Usopp get into this place again? Some kind of secret passage, right? Now if only they could find it.

    "So, how do we get in?" questioned Nami. She stared up at the beautiful house with just a twinge of envy. Ok, maybe more than a twinge, but you couldn''t blame her, given that she grew up poor in a small house, forced to wear her older sister''s hand-me-downs.

    "I''m working on it!" thought Nick, as he searched the thorny bushes along the bottom of the wall. He was about 90% certain there was supposed to be a false patch of shrubbery somewhere, but for the life of him, he couldn''t find it.

    He did, however, find some cute, adorable squirrels. "Aw¡­" he said, staring at the endearing little things, with their fluffy tails, tiny paws, and glowing red eyes.

    Wait¡­ Something about that last part didn''t sound right¡­

    With a screech that belonged to the most abominable demons from the deepest pit of hell, the three squirrels lunged at him. "Ah!" Nick screamed, as he flailed around, trying to get the monstrous little cretins off of him.

    "Nick!" yelled Nami in concern. But when she saw what it was, a sweatdrop formed on the back of her head. She watched him fight a lion for god''s sake, how was he getting his ass kicked by a few squirrels?

    "Get ''em off me! Get ''em off!" he continued to scream, and he was littered with teeth marks. No matter how hard he tried to grab them, they were simply too fast, too elusive. He felt one dive into his shirt, and he felt a sharp pain coming from his left nipple.

    Another squirrel dove into his pants, and Nick''s eyes widened in horror. They were going for his nuts! He couldn''t allow that to happen. With a panicked yelp, he began to rip his clothes off, hoping to get rid of their hiding spots.

    "Why are you taking off your clothes!" Nami shouted, with a blush on her face. How did things end up like this? All they needed to do was sneak into a mansion and talk to the owner. Easy peasy. She broke into tons of houses, although never with the intention of holding a conversation.

    But this was just ridiculous!

    "Alright, hold still," Zoro said, growing sick of the yelling. He unsheathed one of his swords, preparing to slice and dice some furry assholes. As long as the big asshole stopped squirming, he should be fine.

    "No! Not you!" Nick yelled, throwing his shirt at Zoro, blinding him. Said swordsman let out a curse as he ripped the offending piece of clothing off of him. He glared angrily at his companion before noticing something strange.

    The squirrels had stopped tormenting Nick and were now staring at him. Nick stood there, unmoving, pants around his ankles and bare chested, trying not to breathe. He was afraid if he startled them, they would continue their assault on him.

    Lady Luck seemed to smile on him, for the demonic creatures let out another screech and jumped toward the swordsman. Zoro''s eyes widened at the unexpected turn of events, and was thus unable to defend himself.

    "Ah! Son of a bitch!" he yelled, as he was bitten, over and over again. Like Nick before him, he tried to grab the evil little creatures, but they proved to be too slippery even for him.

    The others would have helped, but with Zoro waving his sword around like a maniac, they couldn''t get close. Luckily for him, the fluffy demons didn''t enter his pants, unlike poor Nick.

    Who had teeth marks on his ass. Luckily it wasn''t on the other side.

    "Will you put that thing away!" Nami yelled at the flailing, green haired man. Or at least, that who Nick assumed she was yelling at. But she could have been yelling at him too, it was hard to tell.

    After all, Zoro wasn''t the only one with a sword unsheathed. Or, mostly unsheathed anyway. He couldn''t get arrested for public indecency if he still had his underwear on.

    Probably.

    Luffy was also no help, as he found the whole thing hilarious. The rubber jerk was laughing his ass off, pointing at the swordsman as he did so.

    Support creative writers by reading their stories on Royal Road, not stolen versions.

    But a noise from the bushes halted his laughter. The three currently not under attack stared at where the noise came from. One by one, pairs of glowing red eyes appeared, staring at them.

    Sweat dripped down their brows as they realized what this meant.

    "Oh dear God¡­"

    With another scream, the whole crew was assaulted by a horde of furry fury.

    Meanwhile¡­

    "And then, after consuming the whole island, the enormous goldfish let out an equally massive roar, and created a whole new island with its poop!" Usopp said excitedly, his arms thrust into the air, and a big grin on his face.

    He was currently sitting in a chair, with Akisu sitting next to him. Across from them, in a matching seat, was Kaya, who had a big smile on her face. Although, if one were to look closely, it was more of a polite smile than anything.

    She was just told a story about a massive turd after all. Not the best tale they''ve ever come up with, but she was thankful they took the time to come and see her all the same.

    The three of them were sitting in her room, around a small table, enjoying a bit of tea and some snacks.

    "Oh my, that sounds¡­ Amazing¡­ And it was really as big as a whole island?" Kaya asked, with her polite smile still in place. Usopp and Akisu gave her matching grins, using their hands to show just how big it was.

    "Oh yeah, it was huge!" yelled Usopp.

    "And stinky!" shouted Akisu.

    That actually did get a genuine giggle out of her. Looking at their excited faces, she didn''t have the heart to tell them she was asking about the goldfish itself, and not its¡­ excrement.

    She really did enjoy this time she could spend with her friends. Lately, it was the only thing she had to look forward to. While she''s been somewhat frail her whole life, which was only exacerbated by the death of her parents, she was still able to take walks through town.

    But now, with everything that was happening, the attacks and most recently, the letter¡­ she hasn''t been able to leave the house at all. Heck, there were some days she didn''t even get out of bed.

    "Hey, what''s wrong?" Usopp asked. Kaya stared at him surprised for a moment, before realizing her melancholy must have shown on her face. She would have to be more careful about that, not wanting to worry her friends.

    "It''s nothing. So, do you have any more stories for today?" she responded, with fake cheer in her voice. Usopp and Akisu shared a look, clearly able to tell she wasn''t alright, and both knowing there was nothing either of them could do about it.

    The long nosed sniper clenched his fist in frustration. If only he was stronger, he could find the jerks responsible and kick their ass. But he wasn''t, and that was the worst feeling of all.

    So he forced a smile on his face, much the same as the girl across from him. He couldn''t show her just how upset he was, because he couldn''t tell her why. How could he possibly tell the girl he had not-so-secret feelings for he wasn''t strong enough to keep her safe?

    That he was a failure as a man?

    He couldn''t and he wouldn''t. So he would just smile through the pain, and do what he could to bring a smile to her face. That was about the only thing he could do.

    "Of course! Let''s see, how about-" Usopp started to say, but was interrupted by the sound of someone screaming.

    "Ah! Get ''em off me! Get ''em off!"

    The three of them shared a confused look as they turned their gaze to the window. It sounded like it came from just beyond the property line, past the wall and bushes.

    "What was that?" asked Kaya, with a hint of fear in her voice. With everything going on, you couldn''t blame her for being nervous. For all she knew, the saboteurs grew tired of destroying ships and were coming for her.

    Or, it could be about the other thing¡­ The thing mentioned in the letter¡­

    She shook her head, not wanting to think about such depressing thoughts.

    "I don''t know. Sounds like someone might be getting attacked by something," Usopp responded. Judging by where the scream came from, he deduced it could only be one thing.

    The squirrels had claimed another victim. He shivered, remembering all the times he was similarly assaulted by the evil little beasts. It took them years to stop attacking him. He assumed it was because they finally realized he wasn''t a threat to them.

    That, or they simply grew tired of the taste, who knows.

    "Why are you taking off your clothes!" shouted a female voice. That made the people listening even more confused, as blushes appeared on their faces, with Kaya''s being the brightest.

    Usopp was even more confused by it. If they were being attacked by the squirrels, why would they take their clothes off? That would just make the bites that much worse. A shirt might not be the best protection against the sharp teeth they possessed, but it was still something!

    "No! Not you!" they heard the first voice yell again. By this point, the three of them moved to the window, trying to see who was making all the racket. Unfortunately, the angle didn''t allow for it.

    All they could see was bush. Bush as far as the eye could see.

    "Ah, son of a bitch!" shouted a new, deeper voice. Usopp wasn''t sure, but those voices sounded familiar. It was on the tip of his tongue, but for the life of him, he just couldn''t place them.

    "I hope they''re ok," muttered Kaya. She looked worried as she stared out across the yard, watching as the bushes seemed to shake violently. That couldn''t have been a good sign.

    "Don''t worry, I''m sure they''re fine," Usopp told her, trying to ease her worry. He knew she didn''t like it when other people got hurt, her kind heart practically broke whenever it happened. It was one of the things he liked most about her.

    Not that he had the courage to tell her that.

    "I hope you''re right¡­" she said. Usopp was about to try and cheer her up again, when the female voice shouted again.

    "Will you put that thing away!"

    Now Kaya''s face turned practically atomic, her mind going to some pretty x-rated territory. After all, didn''t that voice yell about someone taking their clothes off? And the only other voices she heard were male, so that means¡­ the thing he needed to put away was¡­

    A burst of team erupted from her forehead as she nearly fainted, eyes spinning as she imagined just what needed to be put away.

    "Kaya!" yelled Usopp and Akisu, rushing to her side. Usopp caught her before she could fall, staring down at her tomato red face with concern.

    "Put it away¡­ Put what away¡­?" she muttered. Usopp and his brother shared a look of confusion. What in the heck was her problem?

    "Kaya, are you ok? Talk to me," Usoop begged, with Akisu watching, an equal amount of concern on his face. With her constitution, it probably wasn''t good for her to faint like that.

    Kaya''s vision eventually began to clear, and her soaring temperature dropped. She blinked in confusion, staring up at Usopp, who had his arms wrapped around her.

    "Huh? Usopp?" she asked. She looked around her, seeing Akisu staring at her with worry. But why were they worried? She felt just fine. A little hot maybe, but fine.

    "Yeah it''s me. How are you feeling?" he asked. That didn''t clear up her confusion, not even a little.

    "I''m fine. What happened?" she asked. Usopp opened his mouth to speak, but another voice interrupted him. It was the girl''s voice.

    "Hey, get out of there!"

    "Don''t worry Nami! I''ll save you!" shouted the first voice.

    "Don''t you dare!" they heard the girl shout again, followed by the sound of a slap.

    The three of them shared another look of confusion, not knowing what was going on or what to do. That''s when Kaya noticed her position, wrapped up in Usopp''s arms.

    A brand new blush erupted from her face, even redder than the last one. That''s when she remembered exactly what she fainted in the first place. Someone, a boy, had to put something of his away.

    And now she was in the arms of the boy she had a not-so-secret crush on, and her mind wandered to something of his that he would have to put away. Something that looked a lot like his nose.

    With strength no one knew she possessed, least of all herself, she pushed Usopp away from her, sending him flying out of the window. She watched him disappear from view with a look of horror on her face.

    "Usopp, no!" she yelled, rushing toward the window to see if he was alright. She was joined by Akisu, and the two of them saw Usopp sprawled out on the ground, groaning in pain.

    "Are you ok?" she yelled.

    "Never better," he groaned out. Kaya sighed in relief, holding her hand to her chest. Akisu, however, was not as easily mollified.

    "What was that about?" he asked angrily. Kaya looked at him with a cute blush on her face, completely embarrassed by what just happened.

    "I''m sorry, I didn''t mean to. I was just startled," she said, trying to explain. But the more she talked, the more confused Akisu became. He eventually stopped listening as she devolved into rambling.

    Today was teaching him all sorts of things. Primarily, girls are scary.

    And also weird.

    Thankfully, Kaya''s babbling was put to rest by the sound of someone whistling. The pair of them looked back outside, listening to brand new shouts.

    "Intruders!"

    "Get them!"

    "That one''s naked!"

    "The squirrels were after my nuts!"

    They shared a look with each other. If they really were intruders, that could only mean they were with the ones responsible for the attacks of the shipyard. Akisu growled in anger at that. How dare they show their faces here!

    But for some reason, the voices sounded familiar, and like his brother, he wasn''t able to place them.

    Usopp himself sat up, staring in the direction of the voices with narrowed eyes. If they were the ones responsible for making Kaya worry, he would show them what for!

    Just as soon as he got feeling back in his legs.

    "Oh crap!" they heard the first voice shout from across the wall.

    "Damn it, now what?" growled the deep, male voice.

    "Quick, everyone grab on!" yelled a new voice, one that Usopp could swear he heard laughing just a minute ago. But what exactly did he want them to grab onto?

    "Grab on to what!?" yelled the female voice, echoing Usopp''s own thoughts.

    "Me! Hurry!" shouted the third male voice. Now Usopp was very confused. Why did he want them to grab on to him? Was he some kind of pervert or something? If he was, he wasn''t getting anywhere near Kaya!

    "What!? Not this again!" shouted the girl.

    Again? Does that mean she''s grabbed him before? Were they all perverts or something? Wasn''t there also a naked guy?

    "No choice, hurry up!" yelled the deep voice. The girl''s voice could be heard moaning in despair.

    "Hang on, what aout my pants!?" yelled the first voice.

    That settles that, they were all perverts.

    "Forget them, just grab on!" demanded the deep voice. Now it was the other guys turn to moan in despair.

    But you know, now that he was a bit closer, Usopp was certain he''d heard them before. In fact, they sounded just like those guys he left at the restaurant. But that couldn''t be right, he told them to leave!

    But then again, they were pirates. Usopp should have guessed they wouldn''t listen.

    "Everybody ready! Alright, here we go! Gum Gum¡­"

    Usopp stared as he saw a pair of hands gripping the metal spikes on top of the wall. How did they get there? It was like they stretched or something!

    ¡­Oh right. That guy had Devil Fruit powers that let him do exactly that, didn''t he. Now Usopp just felt stupid.

    "Rocket!" shouted the voice Usopp was now certain belonged to Luffy. He and the rest of them watched as they went flying into the air, screaming. One out of fun, and the other three out of terror.

    The sniper followed them as they soared through the air, their screams becoming distant. He lost them in the sun, closing his eyes from the pain. He blinked rapidly, trying to clear the sunspots from his eyes.

    As he was doing this, the screams were gradually getting louder and louder, approaching the ground at a rapid speed. When his vision finally cleared, Usopp looked back to the sky, careful to avoid looking directly into the sun this time.

    But what he spotted made his eyes bug out from his skull. Not only could he see the four people he explicitly told to leave, they were also heading straight for him! With a scream of his own, Usopp watched completely helpless as they crashed right into him, creating a large cloud of dust.

    "Usopp!" Kaya shouted from the window. Akisu wasn''t content to just watch, as he jumped into the tree near her window and climbed onto the ground. He rushed over to the pile of entangled bodies, searching for his brother.

    He spotted him, at the very bottom of the pile, looking much worse for wear. His nose was bent at a weird angle, there was blood coming out of his mouth, and he was pretty sure he was missing a tooth.

    But now that he could see them, Akisu also recognized the rest of them as well. That made him sigh in relief. At least they weren''t here to kill them all, even if that was hard to tell with his brother''s current condition.

    "Ow¡­ Remind me not to do that again," complained Nick, holding his head in pain. The others weren''t faring much better, as they groaned in response. The only one who seemed to enjoy the experience, was also the only one made out of rubber.

    Luffy laughed happily, standing up with his hand on his head. "Looks like we got away," he said, cheer in his voice. He looked back to his crew, only to see them sprawled out on the ground.

    "Hey, what''s wrong with you guys?" he asked, tilting his head in confusion.

    "What do you think!?" Nami and Zoro shouted back. Nick didn''t have the energy lef to do so, deciding to glare at him instead.

    "Hey!" shouted another voice. The group turned to see none other than Akisu standing there, giving them his own glare.

    "Oh hey! What are you doing here?" Luffy asked, not at all bothered by the kid''s angry look.

    "That''s my line! And will you get off of him already!?" he shouted.

    Get off of him? Get off of who?

    The group looked down to see who he was talking about, only to finally spot the broken form of Usopp, groaning on the ground.

    "Get¡­ off¡­ of¡­ me¡­ please¡­" he begged.

    Oh, that''s who¡­

    Whoopsie¡­

 Chapter 19

    Luffy and Nick carefully dragged the battered form of Usopp over to the tree and propped him up against it. His clothes were filthy and wrinkled, with small splotches of his blood coating it.

    "Hey you doing ok?" asked Nick, kneeling next to him. For his trouble, Nick was met with a rather angry glare. It may have been a bit more intimidating if Usopp''s nose was all twisted up.

    "Gee, what do you think?" he responded sarcastically, wincing in pain as he tried to maneuver himself into a more comfortable position. He sighed in relief as he finally managed to do just that.

    Much better without that knot in the tree digging into his back.

    Looking up at the group, Usopp''s vitriol turned into bafflement. "What the heck happened to you guys?"

    The scary swordsman had drawings on his face, making him look like some kind of sophisticated cat, which Usopp found hilarious. Not that he would ever tell him that, as he much desired to continue living. It also appeared slightly smudged, like he tried to remove it.

    Which he most likely had.

    But the more pressing concern was Nick, who was standing there in nothing but a pair of boxers, seemingly without a care in the world. Not only that, but he was also covered in scratches and bite marks, with a bright red handprint on his left cheek.

    What was that about?

    Actually, looking at them a bit closer, he could see that they were all covered in scratches and bite marks. So they did get into a fight with the squirrels from hell, then. Been there, done that. He might have a bit more sympathy if he wasn''t partially mangled due to their actions.

    The group of four turned to look at each other, noticing their appearance. Not the best look when they were coming to strike a deal with someone, but it was too late now.

    "Oh you know, this and that," Nick said nervously, rubbing the back of his head, giving a little chuckle. No need to tell him they lost to a bunch of fluffy tailed rats. That would not help them in the least.

    "This and that, huh?" Usopp questioned, leaning forward with a groan. He gave them a suspicious look, as he continued his questioning, "I thought I told you to leave, so what are you doing here?"

    "And where are your pants?" asked Akisu next to them.

    Now it was everyone''s turn to stare at a nearly naked Nick, who shrugged his shoulders, "You know, that''s a good question. I''m sure they''re around here somewhere."

    Before Luffy flung them up over the wall, they were around his ankles. Not the best strategy when fighting off demonic woodland creatures, considering how difficult it made moving. But when they rocketed into the air, they must have fallen off from the force. Now he didn''t know where they were.

    "You really are a dumbass," muttered Zoro, causing Nick to gain a tick mark on his forehead.

    "I don''t want to hear that from you, kitty cat!" Nick responded. Now it was Zoro''s turn to gain a tick mark, as the two of them butt heads, growling at each other.

    "What was that?"

    "You heard me, four eyes."

    Nami sighed, as she forcefully separated the two, "That''s enough! We didn''t come here to fight, remember?" She gave the two of them a glare, as they grumbled and looked away from each other.

    The orange haired girl rubbed her forehead in irritation. Why did they have to act like a couple of cavemen? Was it the testosterone? Or were they just that stupid?

    "Um, excuse me?" questioned a soft voice from above them. They all turned to see who was talking and saw a pretty blonde haired girl leaning out of the window, looking at them in concern.

    Or to be more accurate, looking at Usopp in concern. But her attention was also trained on the group of strangers in her yard. She was worried for a moment about their intentions, but seeing as Usoop seemed to know them, she thought they might not be so bad.

    Though her face did flush a bit at seeing the one boy who was nearly naked, staring at her with his hands on his hips. While she may have had feelings for a certain long nosed boy, she was still a young woman who was not opposed to a bit of eye candy.

    "Oh, hey. Sorry about just barging in like this," Nami said, looking apologetically at the girl. Although her eye gained a slight twitch at seeing her stare at Nick like he was a piece of meat.

    But it was just because he was her friend and didn''t appreciate him being objectified like that. Even if he stared at her from time to time with a similar look in his eyes. Or all the time really.

    But she certainly wasn''t jealous. Nope, not even a little bit.

    Nick felt sweat drip down his back as he saw Nami glare at him. Geez, what did he do this time? Was it the no pants thing? Or was she still upset about him trying to remove the squirrel that jumped down her shirt?

    He was only trying to help, honest! There were no ulterior motives behind his actions, only the altruistic desire to save his companion from the furry little beast. Nothing more, nothing less.

    But Nami didn''t see it that way, and Nick received one hell of a slap for his efforts. Guess that''s what happens when you try to help some people. No appreciation.

    "Um, no that''s alright. But, who are you people?" Kaya asked gently, head tilted slightly in confusion. It was honestly adorable, and Nick could understand Usopp''s crush on her.

    And he did have one, Nick could tell. Just from the flushed look on his face as he stared at her with his mouth slightly open. If he wasn''t careful, flies might get in.

    "I''m Luffy! Who are you?" Luffy asked with his usual excitement. He was always happy to meet new people. Unless they were jerks, then he was happy to beat them up. But she didn''t seem like a bad person, so he went with the first option.

    Kaya giggled a bit from Luffy''s exuberance. It reminded her of the kids who hung around Usopp. "My name is Kaya. I''m happy to make your acquaintance."

    "Oh, so your Kaya. Sweet, you''re the person we need to talk to," said Luffy with a big grin on his face. But his statement only caused more confusion in the poor girl.

    "Me? Whatever for?"

    "Well you see-" Nick started to say, but was cut off by a shout from Usopp.

    "Nothing! They don''t need anything! In fact, they were just about to leave, right?"

    "No, we came to talk to her," stated Luffy plainly. Usopp''s mouth was agape, like he couldn''t believe Luffy would contradict him like that. It was honestly hilarious.

    "We were hoping you could help us get a ship," said Nami, much to Usopp''s further annoyance. These people didn''t listen to a word he said.

    "Oh, I see. I''m sorry, but I don''t think I can help you," Kaya said sadly. She seemed honestly disappointed that she wasn''t able to help them. She was an angel, and Nick decided she needed to be protected at all costs.

    Support the author by searching for the original publication of this novel.

    "It''s because of the attacks right? Actually, we were hoping to make a deal with you," Nami continued to negotiate. It was a good thing she was there, because Nick doubted the rest of them would be able to do so.

    Luffy, maybe. He did have that main character power that seemed to draw people to him. So he could probably convince her, but Nick? Or Zoro?

    Not likely. Zoro was a gruff guy most of the time, and his attitude wasn''t exactly conducive to proper negotiations like this. He would likely just intimidate her until he was run out of town by angry village folk.

    And Nick¡­ Nick wasn''t wearing any pants. He probably wouldn''t even be allowed inside the house, let alone be allowed to talk to her. Or maybe it would work as a negotiation tactic, judging by the way she kept sneaking glances at his muscular, nearly naked form.

    Now if only he could get Nami to look at him like that.

    Usopp meanwhile was freaking out. How did they know about the attacks!? He didn''t tell them anything, and he was sure the townsfolk and the shipwrights were told to keep quiet, how did they find out?

    The only explanation was somebody had to have blabbed. But who? He looked back and forth between them and his very close, personal friend (some might even say bestie) with concern.

    She was much too frail for these things. That''s why he was trying to keep them away. That, and his pride of course. He wanted to be her knight in shining armor, the man who saved the town and earned her everlasting affections.

    But he couldn''t do that if they butted in.

    "A deal? What kind of deal?" she asked. Part of her wished that Merry or Klahadore were here to help her deal with this, as she wasn''t confident in her ability to hold such discussions. But another part was curious about what they had to say, and was glad they treated her like an adult.

    And not like an invalid.

    Something the other two rarely did. She knew it wasn''t anything malicious, they just couldn''t see past the child they helped raise. That was especially true for Merry, who''s been with her since she was small.

    There was also her constitution to consider. She knew she didn''t exactly exude the vibrant aura of youth, but she wasn''t useless! She could do plenty, if only they would let her.

    So this may have been her big shot to prove to them that she could handle more. That she was a capable young woman.

    Now if only her hand would stop trembling.

    "Well, you see-" started Nick, but he was once again cut off, making his eye twitch in irritation.

    "So this is what all the racket is about," said a suave, condescending voice. Everyone turned to see who it was that butted in on the conversation. When Nick noticed who it was, his eyes narrowed in suspicion.

    He was a fairly tall man, with dark green, nearly black hair, wearing glasses and a neatly pressed butler''s uniform. On the uniform were mysterious, golden images that looked like bells.

    Or turds, Nick wasn''t sure.

    "So he is here. The cat that claws at the door," Nick thought. The sudden appearance of the man made Nick feel wary. He didn''t remember a whole lot about the man, but what he did put him on edge.

    He was smart. Very smart. And an intelligent opponent was always a dangerous one.

    "Oh, it''s you Klahadore," Kaya said happily.

    "Oh, that''s his name," thought Nick. Or his fake one, at any rate. If only she knew the danger this man presented. But she didn''t. No one did. No one save for Nick, and there was little he could do about it right now.

    Assuming he could even take the man, that wouldn''t do much to help their situation. Nobody would believe his claims that he was an evil, vicious pirate. No, Nick needed to bide his time and wait for the man to reveal his hand.

    "Indeed Miss. I came when I heard about some intruders. I do hope you are unhurt," he said, while adjusting his glasses using the palm of his hand. Well, that proves that. He was definitely a pirate. That was a tick he got from having to adjust his glasses while wearing those claws.

    Nick wasn''t sure whether or not to be relieved by that. On one hand, his suspicions were confirmed, and knowing that meant he could prepare accordingly. On the other hand, his suspicions were confirmed. He was a pirate, and a very dangerous one at that.

    "Oh I''m fine. These are Usopp''s friends," Kaya chirped. She seemed so much more energetic now that he was here. Nick sincerely hoped his new sniper friend wasn''t getting cucked by the butler.

    That was an amount of emotional damage Nick wasn''t qualified to treat. Actually, he wasn''t qualified to treat any amount of emotional damage.

    "Is that so?" questioned Klahadore, sounding remarkably unimpressed. His gaze shifted between all of them, before zeroing in on Usopp. Nick shivered as the man''s cold eyes met his own.

    Zoro himself narrowed his eyes at the man and shifted his position, ready to attack at the drop of a hat. Nami was hiding behind her meat shield, aka Nick, and Luffy was just staring at everything, unsure of what was going on.

    Usopp himself was glaring at the man, with Akisu sitting down nervously beside him. If Nick remembered correctly, the two of them had some beef, but he couldn''t remember what it was about. Something about Usopp''s father.

    Or it could have something to do with his brother. That was a definite possibility, and Nick still had no idea who he was. He needed to find some opportunity to ask him, but now wasn''t the time.

    "And how is young Usopp this evening?" Klahadore asked with false care, bordering on mockery.

    "Fine," Usopp ground out, glare never lessening. His hand twitched toward his slingshot, but he stopped himself from pulling it out, no matter how badly he wanted to.

    "Truly? You don''t appear fine. It looks like you engaged in some kind of tomfoolery. Though I shouldn''t be surprised, considering who your father is," the butler snidely remarked.

    So it was about daddy dearest. That was one more thing following canon. Nick couldn''t help but wonder what his beef was with the man. Did he run into the Red Hair Pirates and get shot by Yasopp or something?

    Because judging by the tone of his voice, dude was sporting a massive hate boner for the guy.

    "Don''t you dare talk about my father!" Usopp growled. He looked like he was about to get up and wallop the guy, but Akisu held him tight, preventing him from doing something stupid.

    "Who''s this jerk," asked Luffy, getting angry at the man for making fun of one of his friends.

    "That''s Klahadore. He works here as my butler," responded Kaya, before turning to face said butler with an angry frown.

    "But that was uncalled for! Apologize to Usopp!" she shouted. Well, shouted wasn''t very accurate. More like an angry bunny gently chastising someone. It was as adorable as it was ineffective.

    "Apologies, Miss Kaya, but I cannot condone you associating with such riffraff," Klahadore said, once more adjusting his glasses.

    "He means you," commented Nick to Zoro in a conspiratorial whisper.

    "Shut up," Zoro growled back.

    Their interaction drew the attention of the pirate in disguise, as his eyes narrowed at them. He really couldn''t stand people disrespecting him. Especially people like them, who wandered about in the buff.

    And he couldn''t help but feel personally insulted by the cat-like appearance of the green haired swordsman. If he didn''t know better, he''d say he was mocking him. But that was impossible, as no one knew his true identity. At least not anyone here.

    If only he knew¡­

    "And just who might you be? A couple of clowns to give us a show," mocked the butler. He smirked as Zoro growled angrily at him. He could tell how badly he wanted to draw his swords and cut him down.

    It was always entertaining to rile up those of a lesser mind.

    It was curious that he was carrying three of them though. He has heard rumors recently of a bounty hunter who uses three swords. He was supposed to be a rather remarkable swordsman. Roronoa Zoro, that was his name he believed.

    "Actually, we heard somebody was about to have a birthday, and we''re a pair of strippers here to put on a show," Nick commented, trying to keep the shit eating grin off of his face. Something that was proving difficult by the annoyed twitching of the butler''s left eye.

    The squeak from above him didn''t help either. Kaya''s face was practically steaming as she pictured it in her mind. Honestly, she didn''t even need to use much of her imagination, considering Nick was nearly naked already.

    "Must you antagonize him?" asked Nami with a sigh, a bit of red on her cheek. Unlike the girl upstairs, she didn''t need to use her imagination to picture what Nick looked like naked, considering she''s already seen everything when they escaped the Marines in Shells Town.

    Though, she didn''t know what Zoro looked like in the buff, and quite frankly, she didn''t want to know.

    "What, he started it," Nick said.

    "If that''s your purpose here, I suggest you leave immediately. We have no need for people of such low standing here," said Klahadore. He glared at Nick who was happy to note the irritation in the older man''s eyes. Made the mockery all the more worthwhile.

    Speaking of mockery.

    "My eyes are up here buddy," Nick said, pointing to his eyes. He heard a few snorts of amusement from behind him, likely Zoro and Usopp. He was glad he could entertain them.

    "Enough! I want you and your friends out of here at once," he said, losing a bit of his patience. He took in deep breaths, trying to get his anger under control. He wasn''t used to people attempting to rile him up, and he snapped before he could stop himself.

    "No, not until we talk to Kaya," stated Luffy. There was no room for argument in his tone. They would speak to Kaya, and that was the end of that. No matter what Klahadore had to say on the matter.

    "You¡­" growled the now angry butler. A bit of his immaculately combed hair came out of place at their defiance. But just as it seemed like he would attack them, he took a deep breath, and wiped his hand over his hair, fixing what fell out of place.

    "Very well. Speak your business, and then leave. But I suggest you hurry. The guards will be here at any moment," he said.

    Honestly, it surprised Nick that they weren''t here already. But then again, the house and the grounds it was on was massive, so maybe that had something to do with the response time?

    However, he could hear them in the distance, getting ever closer with each passing second. What was more worrying was the sound of dogs he could hear accompanying them.

    It seems Mr. Burns has released the hounds. What a dick.

 Chapter 20

    Things were tense as the butler, Klahadore, glared daggers into everyone present. Thankfully, they were dulled by the returned gazes of those opposed to him. Nick''s was particularly potent, being the only one who knew his true nature.

    Kaya stared at them with a worried expression. While it was true she wanted to be taken more seriously by her caretakers, she didn''t want them upset with her either, and Klahadore seemed particularly irritated. She can''t remember the last time she''s seen him lose his cool like that.

    She needed to remove the tension she could feel, or at the very least, reduce it to manageable levels. She could either send the group away, those who came seeking her aid, though she was loath to do so. If people needed help, it was only natural to help them, right?

    Or, she could listen to them, hear what they had to say. However, that ran the risk of irritating Klahadore even further, and he would likely be grumpy for weeks. The guilt of making her friend/caretaker upset would eat her alive until he forgave her.

    Ooh, what should she do? The indecision was giving her a headache, and making her tummy hurt. Maybe being in charge of things wasn''t what she wanted after all.

    "Kaya," said a voice from below, dragging her out of her pessimistic thoughts. She looked at the one who had spoken, the boy with the straw hat. He gazed at her with a deep intensity, and she found she couldn''t help but hear him out.

    There was just something about him that compelled her to listen. Not to obey, but to simply hear what he had to say. If nothing else, she was glad it helped her make a decision. "Um, yes?"

    "We heard that your ships are being attacked, is this true?" Luffy asked. It wasn''t that he doubted old man Pett, but he wanted her to confirm it herself.

    "Oh, yes it is, I''m afraid. It''s been happening for some time now. Why?" she asked. She remembered the girl said they wanted to make a deal with her, but she couldn''t imagine what it could be about.

    "We need a ship, and that can''t happen if these attacks continue. So we''ll beat these guys up for you, if you promise to give us a ship," he stated. Nick was somewhat surprised by Luffy''s relative eloquence here.

    And he wasn''t the only one, as most of those gathered gave him surprised looks. "Wow, you did that all without shouting. I''m impressed," said Nami with a teasing voice.

    "What''s that supposed to mean!?" Luffy shouted, as Nami looked away, pretending to be innocent. "Oh, nothing."

    "She means you''re loud," snarked Zoro.

    "Huh? I''m not loud!" yelled Luffy, proving Nami''s point. The group began to bicker and tease each other, as the rest of them stared in bafflement.

    These were the ones they were supposed to trust to defeat the pirates responsible for attacking the shipyards?

    Kaya herself was more surprised by the proposal than the bickering, but then again, perhaps she shouldn''t be. In retrospect, it was pretty obvious what they wanted. But that didn''t mean she knew how to respond. She was uncomfortable at the thought of people putting themselves in danger over her.

    Usopp himself glared down at the ground, clenching his fists. He wasn''t upset by what they suggested, not really. He was more upset by the fact that he couldn''t handle this on his own.

    The thought of him not being enough to protect Kaya made him feel ill. Worthless. What kind of man couldn''t protect the people he loved? A useless one, that''s who!

    These thoughts ran circles in his head. Round and around they went, until he couldn''t take it anymore, until¡­

    "Enough! We don''t need your help!" he shouted. The group of four stopped their bickering, turning to face him with surprise on their faces. Kaya and Akisu stared at him with concern, rather than shock.

    "Usopp¡­" Kaya muttered, looking down at her upset friend.

    "I told you over and over again, we don''t need your help! We can handle this on our own, so just butt out!" Usopp continued to yell. He was panting in anger at this point, glaring at the people who came in and stuck their noses into things they shouldn''t.

    "Oh really? It''s been a month already, and you haven''t done a damn thing. If you could really handle this all by yourself, why haven''t you?" questioned Zoro. His voice was bordering mockery as he glared right back at Usopp.

    "You¡­" Usopp growled through clenched teeth. As much as he wanted to deny what the green haired swordsman said, he couldn''t. It was true, he hasn''t been able to stop the attacks. Hell, he hasn''t even been able to see who did it.

    "Usopp," stated Nick, who was also glaring at the long nosed man, though not nearly as hard. Honestly, he was getting fed up with the liar''s attitude about the whole thing.

    "Yeah, what do you want?" he asked with vitriol.

    "What''s more important to you? Your pride, or Kaya?" he asked.

    Usopp''s eyes widened at the question. He stared into the unflinching gaze of Nick, as the question swirled around in his head. Kaya or his pride, which one held deeper meaning in his heart?

    He was a proud man, perhaps unjustifiably so. But it was the only thing he had to cling to. But was the feeling of importance it gave him more valuable than the woman who clawed her way into his heart?

    Looking up Kaya, who was staring at him with nothing but concern, made his choice easy to make. His pride meant nothing without her.

    "Heh, what a dumb question. Obviously, it''s Kaya," he said, while forcing himself to his feet, using the tree as a crutch.

    "Oh, Usopp¡­" Kaya said, staring at the injured man with warmth. His words made her heart beat twice as fast, and made her stomach twist in curious ways. Her entire body filled with a pleasant heat as she continued to look at him.

    "If you guys really think you can take them out, then you have my support. I''ll help however I can," he stated, standing tall. Akisu looked at his brother with sparkles in his eyes, wondering when he became so cool.

    The rest of the straw hats gave him matching grins, with Luffy''s being the biggest. Kaya herself smiled happily at Usopp seemingly making new friends; his endorsement of them helped to make up her mind.

    But before she could agree to their deal, another, condescending voice, interrupted her. "What utter tripe. You believe yourselves capable of lending us aid? Don''t make me laugh."

    The group turned to the butler, frowns marrying their faces. None more so than Nick, who noticed Klahadore distinctly looking in his direction when he said that. Just because he lost his pants to some greedy squirrels, doesn''t mean they can''t kick some ass!

    Or maybe that''s exactly what he was afraid of, considering he was most likely behind the attacks himself. Of course he wouldn''t want other people involved. The sneaky dick waffle.

    "Oh yes, because you''ve been doing so well on your own," Nami mocked with an eye roll.

    Klahadore seemed to take offense to that, if his angry glare at Nami was any indication. But she also appeared to gain some courage, as she glared right back at the man. She may have still been hiding behind Nick as she did so, but progress is progress.

    "Be that as it may, what makes you lot believe you can help us?" asked the fake butler. And the way he said, "you lot" was done with such derision and pomposity that Nick feared he and the others may come down with a case of douchebaggery.

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    Luckily, such illnesses were rarely contagious, but Klahadore had such a bad case of the disease it may not have mattered.

    "Oh you want our resume? Well why didn''t you just say so!?" asked Nick with false cheer. Klahadore watched with bafflement as the nearly nude young man walked over to him and slung his arm over his shoulder.

    It nearly sent him into a rage.

    "You see, it just so happens that we recently defeated a little group known as the Buggy Pirates. Ever heard of them?" Nick asked with his own aura of smugness. Perhaps it was contagious after all.

    Klahadore, however, was not so easily impressed. He scoffed, fixing his slightly crooked glasses, glaring at the audacious man who dared put his hands on him, "Do you really expect me to believe a bunch of fools such as yourselves were able to defeat one such as Buggy?"

    It was simply impossible to think about. Klahadore knew well who Buggy was, and to think these simpletons were able to defeat him was an absurdity of the highest degree. No, he had to be lying, trying to appear more competent than his half naked form would imply, that was the only logical explanation.

    "And remove your hands this instant!" he shouted, throwing Nick''s arm off of himself.

    "Ok, ok, geez. Somebody''s touchy," Nick muttered as he took a few steps away from the man. Klahadore then proceeded to fix his now rumpled suit, releasing an aggravated huff as he did so.

    "But I wasn''t lying, we really did beat Buggy and his merry band of assholes. I personally took out the furry," Nick said in a proud tone of voice. "So believe me when I say, whoever is doing this is in for a world of hurt."

    Nick''s voice took on a deeper, more threatening tone as he gave Klahadore a hard stare, one which was returned in equal measure. Nick sure wasn''t making any new friends here.

    "And I''m sure you believe that. But I will not suffer the aid of fools," Klahadore spoke, eyes roaming over each and everyone present, sending chills down a few of their spines.

    Three guesses who those were.

    "Well, good thing it isn''t up to you then, now isn''t it? It''s up to her," said Nick, pointing to a visibly worried looking Kaya.

    "Miss Kaya is hardly mature enough to make such decisions. She leaves such things to myself or one of our qualified staff," Klahadore dismissed, making them frown, including Kaya, who gripped the windowsill in frustration.

    Klahadore wasn''t usually this overtly blunt about things, but these were his true feelings on the matter. He truly didn''t believe she was capable of making decisions for herself. It was vexing in the extreme for the young woman.

    "Oh yeah? Well we weren''t asking you, so why don''t you keep that mouth of yours shut?" asked Zoro, getting sick of the butler''s attitude. And he wasn''t the only one. Usopp still looked like he wanted to grab his slingshot, and Luffy hasn''t blinked in a while. He just kept staring at the guy. It was really unnerving.

    "I beg your pardon?" Klahadore asked through grit teeth.

    "Beg all you want, it doesn''t change anything," Zoro responded.

    Klahadore now looked ready to blow his top, but he somehow managed to keep his composure. He really wasn''t used to back talk at all, was he?

    "Miss Kaya, you cannot possibly be thinking of begging for their assistance, can you? I assure you, we have everything well in hand," he claimed, bowing his head toward his employer.

    Must have killed him on the inside to bow his head to someone like that. His pride was set to a permanent ten after all.

    "Oh, I, um¡­" Kaya stuttered, being put on the spot like that.

    "Hey, we aren''t asking her to beg us for help, so don''t put words in our mouths! We are here to make a mutually beneficial deal," Nami said, angered by Klahadore''s attempt at gaslighting.

    "I would ask the young lady for silence as Miss Kaya deliberates on the best way to turn you all down," Klahadore stated, raising from his bow. Nick couldn''t help but snort at that.

    "Oh, so sure she''ll turn us away?" he asked with snark.

    "But of course. Ah, it seems like the guards have finally arrived as well. Your time appears to be up," Klahadore said with a smirk of his own. And sure enough, coming around the corner were dozens of guards, some with barking, angry dogs on leashes.

    Each of them was wearing a pressed, blue suit with a white undershirt and a black tie. They were also wearing black sunglasses and carried with them wooden or steel batons.

    "Ah hell¡­ Zoro, want to help me distract them?" asked Nick, giving him the puppy dog eyes. The swordsman rolled his eyes at the look, but agreed all the same. "Fine¡­ What a pain in the ass."

    "Alright, the rest is up to you," Nick said with a jaunty wave toward Nami and Luffy, as he and Zoro walked toward the shouting guards charging for them.

    "Right, leave it to us," Luffy said, as Nami gave them a worried look. "Just don''t kill anyone, alright?" she said.

    "Tsk, like we didn''t know that¡­" Zoro grumbled under his breath, making Nick chuckle.

    The pair of them slowly approached the guards, who stopped and watched them carefully. "Alright you two, come with us quietly and maybe, we won''t hurt you too bad," said guard number 1.

    "You hear that Zoro? They won''t hurt us too bad," Nick said with a snicker. After his ordeal at the hands of Buggy and his goons, these random NPC bastards weren''t threatening in the least. Although, neither were the clowns, come to think of it¡­

    Meh, he was sure he wouldn''t get tortured this time.

    "Awful nice of them," Zoro said with a smirk of his own. Of course, the hired goons didn''t take kindly to their being mocked.

    "You think you can take us all on? There''s 15 of us and only 2 of you," another guard snarled.

    "Oh, is that all? Do you have more guys waiting somewhere else? Because if so, we''ll wait," Nick said with a cocky grin, and Zoro snorted in amusement.

    "You smug bastard! That''s it, get them!"

    Having said that, they released the hounds. Thankfully, they only had three of them, so it wasn''t that big of a deal. Much easier than a single, big ass lion. The only real issue is that they needed to hold back, not wanting to do any permanent damage to them.

    "I''ll handle the mutts," said Zoro, taking a few steps forward.

    "I was hoping you would say that," chirped Nick.

    Zoro removed two of his swords, sheath and all, and put them in a guard position as the dogs lunged for him. Their mouths bit down hard on the wooden sheaths, two on one sword and one on the other. But Zoro didn''t budge an inch.

    "Be a good dog, and sit," said Zoro, holding the canines back. But they weren''t the only one to worry about, as the 15 mooks charged at them, shouting their sad little battle cries.

    With Zoro tied up dog sitting, it was up to Nick to hold the rest of them back. With an excited smile, he ran past Zoro and the dogs, straight for them. They stopped as they saw this, putting up their own guards.

    "Geronimo!" Nick shouted as he neared them, jumping into the air and body slamming the center of the group. They did not see that coming.

    "Gah, what''s with this guy!?" shouted one.

    "He''s tougher than he looks!" shouted another.

    "Where''s his pants!?" shouted a third.

    All in all, Nick was having a wonderful time.

    Kaya watched this happen with worry on her face. Actually, she''s had that face ever since Klahadore opened his big mouth. But she really didn''t want anyone to get hurt. Not the people who came to offer help, or the people who worked so hard for her.

    But what could she do? What was the right decision? Should she do as Klahadore says, and tell them to leave? She would like to think they could stop the attacks on their own, wanting to believe in the people of her home, but it''s been a month now and it''s only gotten worse.

    This couldn''t go on much longer. They needed to put a stop to this, and soon. The very future of the village, and everyone in it was at stake. And that wasn''t even her only problem.

    She knew who was behind the attacks, and she even knew why. Belief wouldn''t stop them, action would. They needed help. The fact that these people appeared now of all times, must be more than a coincidence. It had to be fate.

    "Miss Kaya, there''s no reason to concern yourself in these matters. Everything will be taken care of, I assure you," Klahadore spoke in his gentlest voice. To Kaya, it was reassuring, and bright forth a new wave of uncertainty.

    "Why don''t you zip it and let her decide for herself," said Nami, who was now hiding behind Luffy, since her previous meat shield was currently involved in what appeared to be a mosh pit.

    All that was missing was the music, and you wouldn''t be able to tell the difference.

    "Yeah!" shouted Akisu, agreeing with the ginger haired beauty. His courage ran out when the butler''s glare turned to him, making him run behind Usopp, who somehow, managed to stand his ground against the very same glare.

    Guess anger trumps cowardice.

    "Listen here you scarlet wench, these matters are not of your concern," he growled back at her.

    "What did you just call me!?" Nami shouted back, no longer hiding behind Luffy. Her eyes were white with anger and her teeth sharpened to resemble a shark''s.

    But this was far from abating Kaya''s worries. In fact, they merely exacerbated them, as she stared at the feuding pain with worry. No matter what she chose, somebody would be upset.

    And that would upset her.

    "Kaya¡­" said a voice. She looked down at the source, finding it to be the straw hat guy from before, giving her a rather intense stare.

    "Y-yes?" she stuttered out.

    "What do you want to do? What does your heart say?" he asked, making her eyes widen at the question.

    Her heart? It was being torn in multiple directions at the moment. If she knew what it wanted, then it might not be so difficult to decide.

    She looked out across the yard, at the fighting in the not so far distance.

    "Hey I call no biting!"

    To the arguing right below her.

    "I''ll show you a hooker!"

    Then her eyes finally fell on her not so secret crush, Usopp, who returned her look with one filled with kindness and understanding, not saying a word, only giving her a simple nod, and her worries just seemed to melt away. He trusted these people, didn''t he? Even said he would help them. Perhaps she should trust them too.

    Cloning her eyes, having made her decision, Kaya took a deep breath of air, "Enough!" she shouted. Everyone and everything seemed to stop. Nami and the butler stopped arguing, and the guards, Nick and Zoro, stopped fighting, with Nick holding one guy by the shirt, arm pulled back and ready to deck him.

    There was also a guard below him, grabbing onto his legs with his teeth sunk into Nick''s ankle. "Bitch, I said no biting!"

    Kaya huffed and puffed after her yell, as everyone turned to look at her, giving her their undivided attention. There was no going back.

    "I''ve made my decision!"

 Chapter 21

    Nami sighed in relief as she sunk deep into the blissful heat of the bath. Even though she took one just a few days ago, it felt like a lifetime. Sweat, dirt, and other grime accumulated on her body, and she was only too pleased to wash it off.

    Next to her was none other than the lady of the house, Kaya. She appeared far more nervous to be bathing with another person than Nami, who didn''t have a care in the world.

    Who cares if another girl saw her naked, as long as none of the boys tried to take a peek, she didn''t mind.

    The reason she was taking a bath in the first place was because that creepy butler demanded it. Kaya, the sweetheart that she is, invited them to dinner so they could further discuss the deal and everything that''s been happening.

    And having dinner while dirty was apparently a sin to the butler. Not that Nami really minded, she wanted a bath anyway, and this one was positively heavenly.

    Kaya was a bit more reserved about it, however. "Um, maybe I should come back later. Let you enjoy your bath in peace," she said, embarrassed. Her eyes couldn''t help but travel along Nami''s body, and a twinge of envy formed in the pit of her stomach.

    Nami''s body was flawless, at least to Kaya''s eyes. Not a single mark or blemish could be seen on her skin, and her proportions made the slightly younger girl feel inadequate.

    She knew she wasn''t unattractive; she''s seen the stares of Usopp and several of the men in town, but she couldn''t help but compare herself to the beauty in front of her.

    "Don''t be silly. Come on, it''s been too long since I spoke to another girl. All I''ve had for company is sweaty boys for days now," Nami groused while stretching her body in the large, spa-like tub.

    The two of them were currently in Kaya''s private bath, well separated from the boys, who had to use the servants'' bath. Not that they cared much, a bath was a bath after all, but Nami appreciated the little bit of luxury she was given. Sometimes, it pays to be a girl.

    The room itself was rather lavish, with pearly white walls and what appeared to be golden fixtures, though Kaya claimed they were only gold plated. The bath itself was made out of porcelain, and was big enough to seat at least six comfortably.

    An exquisitely carved vanity rested against one of the walls, with a large, foggy mirror that was embedded into a pure silver casing that was made to look like flowers. A few different brushes along with high end makeup littered the top.

    This was exactly the kind of bathroom Nami would have wanted when she was a little girl. Now that she''s older, however, she realizes how vain that was. Though, that wouldn''t prevent her from enjoying the luxury while she could.

    "Oh, um, ok, if you insist," Kaya said shyly. She slowly removed her towel and gingerly stepped inside the tub, releasing her own sigh of contentment as she slipped under the steamy waters. Tension she didn''t know she had just melted away.

    "See, there you go. No need to be so shy," Nami said with a coy look on her face, giving Kaya''s body a once over. The poor girl gave a cute "eep!" as she tried to hide her body, covering her chest with her arms.

    Nami only giggled as she watched, amused by the shy girl''s actions. She watched as Kaya gave her tentative glances, her face covered up to her mouth by the water, and a deep blush on her face. Nami''s mind rewound several minutes, to when Kaya decided to accept their deal.

    "Hey, Kaya?" she asked, giving the girl a curious look, who returned it with one of her own.

    "Hm?" she asked, voice distorted by the water covering her mouth.

    "What made you decide to trust us?" Nami questioned. It wasn''t that she was ungrateful, but they were a bunch of strangers trespassing on her property, with two of them actively fighting her security team.

    And one of them was in nothing but his underwear! If it were her, she likely wouldn''t have done the same thing.

    "Oh," Kaya said, as she rose up from the water. Not enough for anything to be exposed, but enough to hold a conversation comfortably.

    "Honestly, I''m not too sure myself. But if I had to say, it was a few things. Your friend, the one in the straw hat, what was his name again?" Kaya asked.

    "You mean Luffy?"

    "Yes, Luffy. His eyes were so determined, part of me couldn''t help but get swept up in the emotion of it," Kaya explained.

    "Yeah, I get that," Nami stated after thinking about it for a moment. Luffy had that strange quality about him that just made you put your faith in him. She didn''t think such a thing could be properly explained, or that it needed to, really.

    Luffy just made you want to trust him. How that was possible when he was such a goofball was anyone''s guess.

    "And¡­ well, um¡­ Usopp seemed to trust you, so that really helped your argument," Kaya said shyly. Nami noticed the tone of her voice and the flushed look on her face that had nothing to do with the heat from the bath, and a sly, cat-like grin lit up her face.

    "So, what''s your relationship with this Usopp fellow anyway?" she asked, grin widened at the new shade of red Kaya seemed to invent.

    "H-huh? I''m afraid I don''t know what you mean," Kaya said, trying to deflect the question. But Nami was not a woman so easily deterred.

    "Oh really? You two seemed pretty close to me. And you just said he was the main reason you accepted our deal. So come on, spill!" Nami egged her on. Poor Kaya looked about ready to pass out as the orange haired girl kept harassing her for details.

    "Ok, fine! I may, sorta, kinda, maybe, like him¡­ Are you happy now?" Kaya demanded, refusing to look at the other girl. If this is what girl talk was, maybe she was better off without it. She can''t remember the last time she was so embarrassed.

    Probably when Usopp walked in on her getting out of the bath. But she definitely wasn''t going to tell the grinning girl beside her that. She might actually die from the embarrassment if she did.

    "Ha, I knew it! Come on, don''t stop there. What made you fall for him? Come on, tell me," Nami begged. It''s been so long since she''s been able to talk girl with someone else, what with her robbing people all the time. The only one since forever has been her sister, Nojiko, and she didn''t have much juicy gossip to spill.

    "Is this really necessary?" Kaya pleaded.

    "Absolutely. Come on, there''s no need to be so shy. This is just between us girls," Nami said, trying to reassure the younger girl.

    "Fine¡­ If I had to say, it has to be his kindness," Kaya said, with Nami eagerly listening. "After my parents died, I was in a really bad place. I couldn''t even muster the energy to get out of bed. I just didn''t care, you know?"

    Nami did in fact know. When her own mother was killed right in front of her eyes, when she saw her brains explode out from the back of her skull, all the while she had that damn smile on her face, Nami wanted nothing more than to crawl in a hole and never leave.

    But she wasn''t given that choice. No, instead, she wiped away her tears and made a deal with the devil who pulled the trigger. It was the hardest thing she ever had to do, and it cost her everything.

    Her friends, the villagers, even her sister for a time. Everyone turned their back on the traitor who joined the pirates responsible for enslaving them. Her dignity and pride as a human was likewise gifted away, and her very soul was likely bound for eternal torment, no matter the reason she joined.

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    She felt she had very little left to lose at this point, and she would gladly sacrifice what small amount remained to see her people freed.

    "But then one day, a strange boy appeared, and began telling me stories," Kaya continued, snapping Nami out of her painful memories. Soon, the nightmare would be over, but right now she needed to concentrate on the gossip she begged for.

    It would be very rude to ignore the poor girl after Nami dragged the information out of her. Not to mention she could use the distraction right about now.

    "At first, I wanted nothing more than for him to leave, and I told him to do so repeatedly. But he kept coming back, almost every day, no matter how angry I got at him. Eventually, before I even knew it, I began to look forward to his visits."

    Kaya had a soft smile on her face as she recounted her story, her previous red face all but gone. Nami had to admit, a part of her was jealous she had someone so close to help take the pain away. Nami didn''t, not for a long while. Not until the burden became too great for her to bear alone and she confided in Nojiko.

    Since then, her blue haired sister became her rock. A pillar that would help hold Nami up when things got to be too much. Hell, she even got herself tattooed to show Nami her support.

    She really did have the best sister, even if they weren''t related by blood.

    "And he even began bringing his adorable little brother with him. Slowly but surely, I began to feel better, and I was even able to start taking short walks around the village, getting to know everybody. Everything was starting to look up, until¡­"

    "Until the attacks," Nami said, finishing Kaya''s sentence. The wealthy young woman only nodded her head, her precious happy expression morphing into one of worry and sadness.

    "I see. Guess there''s more to the guy than I thought. You''re pretty lucky, you know? Not everyone has someone that''s there to pull them out of the darkness like that," Nami said, giving the other girl a genuine smile, one that was returned.

    "I suppose you''re right," Kaya said, a fond look returning to her eyes. Nami much preferred the happy Kaya to the sad one, but she liked the embarrassed one even more.

    "So, why were you staring so hard at Nick then?" Nami questioned, her sly grin returning, along with Kaya''s red face.

    "W-what do you mean?" Kaya said, trying to deflect once more. But just like her previous attempt, it didn''t work in the slightest.

    "Don''t play dumb, I saw you sneaking glances at him."

    "Well, that''s because¡­"

    "Go on," Nami encouraged.

    Kaya seemed to try and keep her opinion locked deep within her own mind, but her resolve crumbled underneath Nami''s cat-like stare.

    "I mean¡­ He was in his underwear! How could I not look?" Kaya cried, staring at Nami with big, watery eyes, who couldn''t help but laugh at the poor girl. Honestly, she couldn''t blame her, even she snuck in a peak or two.

    "Doesn''t help that he''s hot either, does it?" Nami continued to goad.

    "No it doesn''t¡­" Kaya complained, as Nami continued to laugh. But something about what she said drew Kaya''s attention.

    "Hang on¡­ You think he''s hot?" asked Kaya. Nami''s laughter immediately died, as the roles were reversed.

    "Um, did I say that?" Nami said, trying to laugh it off. But just like Kayas attempts earlier, Nami''s would fail as well.

    "You did. Now it''s your turn to talk," said Kaya, who had her own cat that got the canary grin on her face. Seeing that there was no way of her getting out of it, Nami sighed, "Alright, what do you want to know?"

    "Do you have feelings for him?" Kaya asked. Nami wasn''t sure how to answer that. She liked the guy, and cared about him, enough to make a deal with a pirate, but whether or not her feelings went deeper she couldn''t really say.

    Not to mention, she didn''t have time for romance, not right now, not until her village was freed from the control of Arlong.

    "We''re just friends. And besides, I don''t have time for things like that," Nami said, waving the question off. Unfortunately for her, she wouldn''t be getting out of her own interrogation so easily.

    "That wasn''t my question," Kaya claimed. "Do you have feelings for him?" she asked again.

    "I don''t know, ok?" Nami practically growled out. But rather than being upset by her response, Kaya just gave her one of her soft, compassionate smiles.

    "You know, it took me a while to realize my own feelings. Why don''t you tell me how the two of you met?" Kaya said, erasing most of Nami''s ire.

    "Why do you want to know that?" Nami asked with a sigh, which only got a light giggle from Kaya. "Well, after spending so much time with Usopp, I''ve become rather fond of stories."

    "Alright, fine, if you insist. It all started when I heard this god awful singing¡­" Nami started. She couldn''t help but wonder how the boys were doing as she started telling her story.

    *Line Break*

    "Cannonball!" shouted Luffy, as he dove into the large bath with gusto. Unlike Kaya''s personal tub, the room designated for the servants, specifically the male servants in this case, was far less extravagant.

    The basin was inlayed into the floor and was comprised of smooth stones. Wooden benches treated to resist water rested against the walls, and soft lights lined square, stone pillars placed evenly across the room.

    While it was far from the fancy bath the girls were taking, it was more than rough for the boys.

    "Ah! It stings!" Luffy shouted as he erupted from the water, sending droplets everywhere, getting the others who followed at a more sedate pace wet.

    The reason for his current misery was the unfortunate mixture of squirrel wounds and hot water. Akisu giggled at the screaming boy, as they watched him flail about in the tub.

    "Well what did you expect?" questioned Usopp, as he stared at the whining rubber man in the bath. Did he not know hot water caused pain to injuries?

    "Those stupid squirrels. I want a rematch!" yelled Luffy, slamming his fists against the water''s surface, causing more water to go everywhere.

    "Damn it Luffy, knock it off," complained Zoro. He was already irritated enough by having to take a bath, he didn''t need Luffy''s usual brand of idiocy to compound his annoyance.

    It wasn''t even that he was opposed to taking a bath. The real problem was that they were ordered to by that damn butler, and taking orders from that guy pissed him off. He had the eyes of a killer, not a butler, and that set all kinds of warning bells off in his head.

    And he wasn''t the only one. Nick seemed to have picked up on it as well, but that dumbass was currently out looking for his pants, so he couldn''t discuss it with him. So far, it looked like they were the only two.

    "You''re never going to win," Usopp told Luffy, as he slid into the pleasantly hot water. While his own injuries stung a bit as well, that little bit of irritation was swept away by the refreshing feeling of the bath.

    "What are you talking about? Of course I will. They just caught me by surprise. Next time, I''ll win for sure," Luffy claimed.

    "Sure, sure, whatever you say," Usopp said. Luffy took offense to that and began to splash the long nosed liar with water. Usopp sputtered as some went up said long nose and he glared at Luffy, who only laughed in response.

    "Oh, you think that''s funny do you? Akisu, let''s double team him!" Usopp shouted, as the two began their counterattack.

    "Hey, that''s not fair!" Luffy shouted, as he was quickly overwhelmed by the superior teamwork of the brothers.

    "Hahaha, do you admit defeat? Do so, and we shall grant you mercy," Usopp declared.

    "Never!" Luffy shouted back. "Zoro, help me!"

    "No."

    "What! Why not!?"

    "I''m trying to enjoy my bath, now would you keep it down," Zoro said as he closed his eyes.

    "Look at that, you have no allies willing to help you. Victory is ours!" shouted Usopp.

    "Yeah!" agreed Akisu.

    "Grr, I don''t think so! Let''s see how you handle this! Gum Gum: Bazooka!" Luffy shouted, as he stretched his arms back and flung them, palm first into the water towards Usopp and Akisu, creating a massive wave of water.

    "Oh no!" the two of them shouted before the water crashed into them. Several seconds ticked by before they breached the surface of the water, taking in massive gulps of air.

    "What the hell was that!? Are you trying to kill us?" shouted Usopp, as Luffy stood there, hands on his hips and laughing victoriously. "Guess I win!"

    However, what none of them noticed was the angry form of Zoro, slowly standing up from his seated position in the bath. While they may not have noticed, they sure as shit felt it.

    A sudden chill went down their spine, as all three of them turned slowly to face the angry, demonic form of Zoro, standing there with ink running down his face and eyes glowing red.

    He had clearly been a victim of the wave as well.

    "Oh, crap," stuttered Usopp, terrified of the image in front of him. Akisu hid behind his brother, which wasn''t the most pleasant experience, considering he was naked.

    "Alright, time to die," Zoro said.

    "Hang on, we can talk about this," pleaded Usopp. But he pleas fell on deaf ears.

    "No Sword Style.." Zoro started, raising a single arm and forming his hand into a knife shape.

    "Come, it was all Luffy''s fault. He started it!" tried Usopp, one last time.

    "You jerk!" shouted Luffy.

    "Tidal Cutter!" yelled Zoro, swinging his arm in an arc against the water. The resulting wave was even bigger than Luffy''s, as the three of them screamed in terror before being swallowed up by the deluge.

    A few minutes later¡­

    "Guys, I did it! I found my pants!" Nick shouted happily, holding his pants aloft as he entered the bath. But his triumph was cut short as he saw the scene before him.

    "Uh, what happened here?"

    Zoro was sitting there, calm as can be, with the drawings on his face miraculously removed. But that wasn''t the concerning part. No, the worrying part was the other three, who appeared to be unconscious.

    Usopp was leaning against a pillar, mumbling something Nick couldn''t hear. Akisu was sprawled out on the floor, with what looked like a bucket covering his head. But the most concerning of all was none other than Luffy, who was floating on top of the water, face up thankfully.

    Which was weird, considering he ate a Devil Fruit. Nick was pretty sure he should be at the bottom of the tub. But then again, who knows. Not like his lore knowledge was exactly up to par. Or maybe this was another difference of this universe. He would ask Luffy, but that would have to wait.

    Right now, he had to fish a certain someone out of the water. Nick really hoped he didn''t need CPR.

 Chapter 22

    After a nice relaxing time in the bath where nobody, not a single person, drowned, the group of men were led to a room by one of the staff. A person Nick just so happened to recognize.

    Merry.

    The man responsible for the creation of the Going Merry, their future ship. He was dressed all prim and proper in a deep blue butler suit, and he had a head full of fluffy, wool-like hair, complete with horns. There was also a weird fur choker he seemed to be wearing as well, like a sheep skin S thing.

    Was Merry a freak?

    Unfortunately, or maybe it was fortunate, the uptight Klahadore refused to allow them to dine with Kaya unless they were dressed appropriately. In other words, they couldn''t wear their dirty, peasant clothing in front of the rich lady.

    So that''s what they were doing, making their way through the mansion, wearing nothing but some towels to hide their private bits, until they reached their destination.

    "Ah, here we are," said Merry as he opened the door. Inside was what looked like a clothing store, with shirts hanging on racks along the walls, pants folded neatly on shelves below them, and all manner of accessories displayed on tables.

    Luffy and Usopp''s eyes sparkled in wonder as they charged ahead, inspecting everything in sight. It was only by divine intervention that their towels remained wrapped around their waists.

    The others entered calmly, Zoro''s bored eyes took in the room while Nick looked interested in the rich people clothes. He could practically smell the money that was spent on them.

    Shame they were likely to get ruined. They should know better than to give a bunch of ruffians like themselves nice things. Oh well, that''s how you learn.

    "Dinner will be served shortly, so don''t take too long," Merry said with a sweatdrop as Luffy began throwing clothes across the room. As much as he liked young Usopp for all his help with Kaya and bringing her out of her self imposed shell, he couldn''t help but think the rest of them were a bit much.

    But, if that''s what his lady wants, then as a good servant, he would do his best to assist them, regardless of his personal feelings. He did curse Klahadore in his head for leaving the job to him, even if that was likely for the best.

    "Oh come on, Merry, don''t be such a stick in the mud. It''s not everyday we get to try on clothes like this," Nick said, holding up a silk dress shirt that was as smooth as polished silver.

    "That''s what I''m afraid of¡­" muttered Merry, low enough that they couldn''t hear him. Not that they would care if they could, busy as they were making a mess. He could only sigh at the extra work he would have to do, as he left them to their devices.

    That would prove to be a mistake.

    Luffy removed a shirt, gave it a brief look, and said, "Nuh uh," and tossed it behind him. He did the same thing with several other pieces of clothing. But what he didn''t realize was that each one landed on Usopp.

    "Will you cut it out!" shouted the long nosed sniper, covered in clothing and looking like a discount bin. Luffy turned to look at him, before busting out laughing, "Usopp, you look dumb!"

    "I think it suits him," commented Nick from the other side of the room. Zoro sorted in amusement, a small grin on his face, while Akisu joined Luffy in his laughter.

    "Think it''s funny do you? Well take this!" Usopp shouted, before taking the clothes piled on himself and chucking them right at Luffy. The rubber man yelped as he was pelted with the clothes and knocked onto the ground.

    "Hahaha, that''s revenge for the bath!" Usopp shouted in victory.

    "Oh yeah!?" yelled Luffy, as he stood up, pile of clothes in hand and a twinkle in his eye. Usopp gulped as he slowly backed away, "Come on, we can talk about this," he begged, but it was no use.

    Luffy then threw a shirt at Usopp, who barely managed to dodge. Frustrated by his lack of success, Luffy began a rapid fire campaign, throwing clothing after clothing at him, but Usopp somehow managed to dance out of the way each and every time.

    "Ah, what''s wrong? Can''t hit me?" Usopp mocked, sticking his tongue out at Luffy, which only enraged him even more.

    "I''ll show you!" Luffy shouted, before ramping up his speed even more.

    "Will you two cut it out," growled Zoro, turning to face the two bickering numbskulls, only to be smacked in the face by a pair of boxers. Everything seemed to stop, as the two instigators stared at the green haired swordsman in horror.

    Zoro slowly removed the underwear from his face, a twisted grin on his face and a twitch in his eye. "So you''re that eager to die, huh?"

    Having said that, Zoro joined the fray, chasing after the other two, who ran away from the angry swordsman screaming. Nick and Akisu watched this with grins on their faces, "What do you say? Want to join?" Nick asked.

    "Let''s do this!" the young boy shouted, holding a pair of pants over his head. WIth a war cry he dove into the fray, followed by Nick. What followed could only be described as a food fight, but with clothes.

    Down the hall¡­

    Nami stood in front of a full length mirror, holding up a beautiful dress, inspecting how it looked on her body. Kaya sat off to the side, watching the older girl try on clothing after clothing.

    It was exhausting. Kaya picked out her own dress ages ago, though she supposed it was easier, considering she already knew what clothing she had available, unlike Nami.

    "Hmm, I don''t think so," Nami said, discarding the article of clothing into an ever growing pile. Kaya sighed as this happened. Honestly, there wasn''t a single dress she didn''t look good in, she should really just pick one and be done with it.

    Just then, a loud crash caught their attention. Kaya stood up with a nervous look on her face, "W-what was that?"

    Could it have been an intruder? Someone coming to kidnap her and have their way with her? Probably Nami too once they got a look at her.

    "That''s it, you''re dead!" screamed a familiar voice.

    "Missed me missed, for the love of god don''t kiss me!" shouted another familiar voice. It sounded like Zoro and Nick respectively. Nami groaned at recognizing their voices. Just what were those idiots up to now?

    "Don''t worry, it''s just the boys being dumb. But if they break anything, I am not paying for it," Nami growled. Kaya couldn''t help the sweat drop that appeared on her head as Nami angrily returned to trying on clothes.

    Back with the boys¡­

    Merry entered the room with a small smile on his face, the same one he wore at nearly all times. "Hello gentlemen, have you found something to-what in the world happened here!?"

    The room looked like a disaster zone, with shelves knocked down, tables flipped over, and clothes everywhere. Most of them were on the floor, but there was some dangling from the ceiling fan as well.

    The butler stood in the entranceway, completely aghast at what he was seeing. If he didn''t know any better, he''d say they were robbed. There was also no sign of the boys either.

    Then, a pile of clothes began to move. It shook in an increasingly violent manner, and Merry grabbed a nearby umbrella, holding it in front of himself like a sword, ready to defend himself.

    However, instead of a wild animal, it was none other than Luffy whose head popped out of the pile, "Woo, that was close. I thought I was a goner," he said, desperate for air.

    Merry let out a sigh of relief at knowing he wasn''t about to be attacked. One by one, the rest of them showed themselves, gasping for air as they too escaped the confines of the clothing pile.

    "What the hell, Luffy? You trying to kill us?" accused Nick, once he had sufficient amounts of oxygen in his lungs. Things were going all fine and dandy, clothes were flying and everyone was having a grand old time.

    That was, until Luffy got the bright idea to gather every piece of clothing he could, stretching his arms as far as they would go, and tossing them into the air, covering everyone, himself included, in an almost literal mountain of clothes, nearly suffocating everybody.

    Did you know this text is from a different site? Read the official version to support the creator.

    "My bad," Luffy said, though he didn''t seem very apologetic. The others glared at him, while he just laughed nervously.

    "Dumbass," muttered Zoro.

    "Excuse me¡­" said Merry, causing them to all turn towards him. As they did, a cold sweat traveled down their spines. An aura of fury engulfed the butler''s entire body, even as the smile never left his face.

    Which made it worse, honestly.

    "Would you please explain just what has happened here?" he said in a completely even tone. The rest of them exchanged nervous looks, wondering what to say in this situation.

    "Uh¡­ He did it!" they all shouted, pointing at each other. Merry''s left eye began to twitch uncontrollably.

    Some Time Later¡­

    Nick sighed in exhaustion as he stood outside of Kaya''s room with the rest of the guys, waiting for the girls to finish getting ready. How they were taking so much longer than the boys was a mystery, especially considering the punishment Merry gave them.

    You see, after getting caught wrecking the dressing room, or whatever it was, Merry, the monster that he is, forced them to clean the room. That was his job! This is the problem with today''s generation, forcing others to do their work for them.

    Doesn''t matter that they were the ones to cause the mess in the first place, it was still Merry''s job to clean it up. But no, he shirked his duties onto them. Nick had half a mind to report his behavior to his boss.

    But he wasn''t ready to change his name to Karen just yet, so he''d let it slide, for now¡­

    The point is, it took them forever to clean that mess, and yet the girls were still making them wait. Seriously, how long could it take to put on a dress, do your hair, and slather a bit of paint on your face?

    It took Nick a grand total of 5 minutes to do most of those things, except he didn''t put on a dress and his face was paint free, but besides those things, it took him practically no time at all.

    Unless he was feeling particularly like a diva, then it might have taken him ten minutes.

    Looking down at his outfit, Nick was now sporting a classy, long sleeved dress shirt in just the nicest shade of blue, with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows and the top two buttons undone to show off his muscular chest.

    His pants were black, and made his ass just pop. Like seriously, that thing was dangerous. And underneath his pants was just the nicest pair of underwear he''s ever worn. Nick had no idea what the thread count was, but it must have had several zeroes. The point is, they felt amazing on his balls, and he may have been planning on stealing several pairs.

    The last thing he wore was a pair of dress shoes that seemed to shine in the light, like a sweaty fat kid eating cake in the sun. All in all, Nick thought he looked damn good, and it barely took him any time at all. Hell, even combing his hair only took a minute.

    The rest of the guys didn''t take all that long either. Zoro wore a nice white dress shirt with a black jacket over the top that had a golden eagle etched onto either side. Like Nick, he was also wearing black pants with his swords tucked into the belt, and nice shoes.

    But his most eye catching feature was the long, green scarf he draped across his neck. Each end came down to the edge of his jacket. Who knew Zoro knew anything about style.

    Luffy wore a dress shirt as well, but this one was red, like his vest. A loose tie was around his neck, making him look like a frat bro who just spent the night partying. His pants were blue, unlike the other two, and he refused to wear normal people shoes, opting for his own sandals instead.

    He definitely had the beach bum vibe down pat.

    Usopp wore a dress shirt like everybody else, but his was tie dye. Like a goddamn hippie. He wore a sleeveless vest overtop, that was just the most obnoxious shade of orange you could imagine. Like he thought he was Naruto or something.

    Nick swore, if he started shouting, "Believe it!" he was going to deck him in the schnoz.

    Luckily his pants were a normal shade of black, so not all hope was lost. His footwear was a dark red pair of cowboy boots. Nick liked the theme, hated the color. The last thing Usopp did was slick back his hair and tie the end off in a ponytail.

    Akisu was wearing a nice shirt and a nice pair of shorts, with simple dress shoes. He may not have been wearing a fancy suit or anything, but that was probably for the best. He was a little kid after all.

    So yeah, they all looked like they were ready for a night on the town. Some of them may have been confused about what type of night it was supposed to be, but they were all ready nonetheless.

    Unlike the girls!

    Nick growled as he banged on the door, "Come on already! How much longer is this going to take!?"

    "Hold your horses! We''re almost done!" shouted back Nami from the other side of the door.

    "Well hurry up! Luffy looks like he''s seconds away from resorting to cannibalism!" Nick shouted.

    "So hungry¡­" Luffy moaned pitifully as he sat slumped against the wall, holding his growling stomach which just so happened to sound like an angry, rabid wolf.

    "Ugh, we''ll be done when we''re done! Luffy will just have to wait!" Nami yelled back, uncaring about Luffy''s hunger or the threat of anthropophagy.

    "What a pain in the ass," said Zoro, as Nick stepped away from the door with a sigh. "You''re telling me. I half expect they were done ages ago and are making us wait to fuck with us."

    "She wouldn''t do that. Would she?" questioned poor, naive Akisu.

    "You know nothing of women," Nick stated.

    "Neither do you," said Zoro.

    "I know more than you!" Nick shouted.

    "Like I care."

    "Hah! That means I win!"

    "Like hell it does!"

    "So hungry¡­"

    "Will you all shut up!" yelled Nami as the door burst open. Zoro and Nick ceased their bickering as they, along with the others, turned to stare at the angry ginger. However, it was only one of them whose tongue seemed to stop working.

    Now, Nick knew Nami was a beautiful woman, that was easy for a blind man to see, but her natural good looks had nothing on her when she actually tried. He honestly didn''t think it was possible for her to improve on her looks, as she was a 10/10 on a bad day, but hot damn, it looks like they would need a new measuring system.

    Nami was wearing a literal little black dress that clung onto every curve like it was its job. It went down to her mid thigh and showed off her impossibly long legs. It may not have been a low cut dress, but there was a small opening in the center of her chest, revealing the barest hint of the wonders that lay beneath.

    Her hair was done up, with it being tied off in the back, like a small ponytail but not quite. Nick didn''t know the name of it and he didn''t care, he just knew it looked good. A single long strand hung down the left side of her face, wavy and curled.

    She didn''t have a lot of makeup on, but what she did have emphasized her natural beauty. She didn''t need much, that was clear to see, but what she did use just made her pop that much more, especially her pink, glossy lips.

    Which Nick had trouble looking away from. Every time he did they kept calling back to him, like a siren luring in its next meal.

    A small, gold necklace with what looked like a sapphire hung from her neck, and a pair of black high heel shoes completed her outfit. All in all, she looked like she was going to a fancy restaurant that cost more money than most people make in their entire lives. Funny how they were basically dolled up to have dinner at someone''s house.

    Not that Nick was complaining.

    "Wow, Nami, you look¡­ I mean, um¡­ hoo boy¡­" Nick tried to say, but his tongue was definitely tied. A fact that Nami seemed to rake notice of, if her cat-like grin was anything to go by.

    "What''s wrong Nick, cat got your tongue?" she said. She did have a small blush on her face as she stood there proudly, giving Nick a once over as well. She didn''t think he would clean up so nicely, and as simple as his outfit was, that likely worked in his favor.

    "Yes she does¡­ I mean, no! What cat, I don''t see a cat, ehehehe," Nick responded with a nervous laugh, much to Nami''s, and Zoro''s, amusement. Damn, looks like he wasn''t living that down anytime soon. Curse that stupidly sexy woman.

    And don''t think he didn''t notice the blush on the other boy''s faces, except for Luffy''s. Nick had his eye on them.

    "Is everyone ready?" asked Kaya, as she stepped into the hallway as well. Now it was Usopp''s turn to make a fool of himself, much to Nick''s relief.

    Kaya may not have been dressed to kill, like Nami was, but she was dressed in a classy, yet sexy dress. It was a vibrant pink color, and came down to her ankles, so no eye candy there, and it wasn''t nearly as tight as Nami''s. However, it was low cut, revealing a tantalizing amount of the young woman''s impressive bust.

    Not as impressive as Nami''s of course, but still a top tier chest. Not for the first time did Nick wonder what they fed the women of this world for them to turn out like that.

    Having longer hair than Nami also allowed her more freedom in how she styled it. It was wavy and curly, much like the single strand in Nami''s hair, and part of it was braided and circled her head and coming down the back. Nick didn''t know what it was called, but it most certainly gave her that princess vibe.

    It was like she was doing a sexy Princess Peach cosplay, and Nick was all for it. So was Usopp if his drool was anything to go by.

    She was also wearing a necklace, but unlike Nami, hers was a string of pearls. There was a dirty joke there, but Nick was above such things. Her own high heels were a deeper shade of pink and they were topped by a little white boy.

    Like Nami, she also wore the minimal amount of makeup to emphasize that natural beauty of hers. Nick could definitely understand the crush Usopp had on her, she''s a very lovely woman.

    Kaya stared at the boys looking at her and her face erupted in a blush. She couldn''t believe she allowed Nami to convince her to show off so much skin. It was so embarrassing!

    But seeing Usopp''s flabbergasted face with a red that matched her own made it worth it.

    Nick, seeing that Usopp wasn''t about to snap out of lala land anytime soon, elbowed him in the stomach. "Ow, what was that for?" he growled. Nick just gave him a look and indicated Kaya using his head.

    "Compliment her you idiot," he whispered at him.

    Usopp still appeared confused, even as he stared at Kaya''s embarrassed form. Her eye kept going to the ground, to Usopp, to the ground and back to Usopp. It was clear, to anyone with half a brain, that she was waiting to hear his opinion.

    Usopp gulped as he looked at her, "Oh right! Kaya, you look¡­ good! Yeah, you look very, um¡­ good."

    "He''s as bad at this as you are," stated Nami to Nick with a blank, disappointed look in her eyes. However, Kaya didn''t seem to hold the same opinion, as her face turned even redder. If this continued, she would pass out, and they would get the blame.

    "Come on, it''s not my fault your beauty turned my brain to mush," said Nick, and Nami rolled her eyes at that, though she did have a pleased look on her face.

    "Wow, that was about the corniest thing I''ve ever heard," said Nami with a grin.

    "I am to please," said Nick with one of his own.

    "Thank you. Um, you also look, um good¡­" said Kaya, distracting both Nick and Nami from their little moment. They watched as Usopp and Kaya stared into each other''s eyes, both wanting to close the distance and yet too afraid to do so.

    "Alright that''s enough. Geez, are we going to eat or what?" complained Zoro, snapping the two out of their trance. He was sick and tired of all this mushy crap, and it seemed like Akisu agreed, if the gagging sounds he was making were any indication.

    "Oh, right! Of course. Please, follow me," Kaya said quickly with embarrassment. She then started to practically speed walk her way down the hall, which was somewhat impressive considering she was in high heels.

    "Bout time. Luffy, get up, it''s time to eat," said Zoro, whose words made Luffy perk up immediately.

    "Huh, meat?" he asked, looking around excitedly. Seeing that Zoro and the others were leaving, he quickly jumped up and began to follow, an excited gleam in his eyes. The only two left behind were Nick and Nami.

    Nick gave her a smile and presented her his arm, "Well, shall we?" Nami gave him a sincere smile and looped her arm with his, "We shall."

    The pair of them followed the group of excited teenagers, ready to devour Kaya out of house and home. A real threat with Luffy involved.

 Chapter 23

    The man known as Klahadore traveled through the nearly empty town with a frown on his face. Just thinking about those imbeciles who showed up was enough to make him seethe.

    It was why he left dealing with them up to Merry. If he had to do it, he likely would have blown his cover, and that just wouldn''t do. Not now, not when he was so close to achieving his goal.

    What did this intrepid butler desire you ask? Simple, money. Kaya''s money to be precise. Money that did not rightfully belong to him. But it would, one way or another, that silly girl''s fortune would be his.

    His plan so far had been going almost perfectly. A few slight hiccups here and there but nothing that would interfere with the schedule he put in place. If nothing happened that he did not expect, he would be the proud owner of a shipping company, and young Miss Kaya would be out of the picture.

    But that was just the thing. Something happened that he didn''t expect, which was quite rare. But then again, it was hard to predict the actions of fools. And he now had four more to contend with.

    As much as they didn''t concern him, he would leave nothing to chance, even if the fools didn''t have a pair of brain cells to rub together. So here he was, walking through town to meet with his crew at the bottom of a cliff to issue new orders.

    As much as he detested having to deal with pirates, even if they were his own subordinates, he had little choice in the matter. He couldn''t trust them to think for themselves after all. That was dangerous for a multitude of reasons.

    But this should be the last time he was forced to degrade himself in such a manner. Because after tomorrow, he would be rid of his former lives as a pirate and a butler.

    Reaching the predesignated meeting spot, Klahadore checked his pocket watch. There were still two minutes before they needed to show up. After that, he would have to remind them why it was a bad idea to keep him waiting.

    Alas, it appeared as if he would have no need to put them through synch remedial lessons. From a small distance away, he could make out a rowboat, steadily approaching him.

    Before long, it made shore, and three individuals stepped out. The first was a very large individual by every definition of the word. He stood just over 7 feet tall, and could be classified as obese. The worst part was his refusal to wear a shirt, not wanting to cover up his glorious bod.

    His words.

    He wore a large, fur lined cape that was striped in the back in two different shades of purple, with a large brass cat bell acting like a clasp to keep it in place. He had what appeared to be a cat mask covering part of his face, with two pointy ears on top of his head.

    He wore a pair of red and black striped pants and a yellow sash. On his hands were a pair of gloves with elongated, razor sharp nails he used to great effect to slice and dice his opponents. He also wore a pair of clunky looking shoes on his feet.

    Completing his cat-like ensemble was a pair of large fake canines that looked like they belonged to a vampire more than a cat. This was Buchi, one of his officers and half of the Meowban Brothers.

    Next to him was the other half of the duo, known as Sham. Like Buchi, Sham was a very tall man, nearly 7 feet himself. But unlike his brother, Sham was fairly svelte.

    He has a hunched back, making him appear smaller than he really is, and wore a small navy blue shirt with white buttons and a magenta colored bowtie. The shirt was small enough that he left part of his midriff showing.

    His light blue shorts were also much smaller than they needed to be, looking like they belonged to a small child rather than a grown ass man. He wore a pair of similarly clunky appearing shoes as his brother, as well as a pair of gloves with claws on them.

    His swirly green hair was topped with a pair of small, cat ears, completing his motif. Unlike his brother, he did not have large, fake canines in his mouth.

    However, neither of the two could compare to the last weirdo to exit the boat. That crazy bugger was looking flamboyant in the rearview mirror. His outfit consisted of a white, sleeveless shirt with a blue trench coat over top.

    Normal enough, right? But you see, the trench coat was covered in gaudy, gold colored rings each about the size of his fist. His pants were also an eyesore, considering they were mustard yellow, with just the brightest orange stars woven all over it.

    The worst part of the pants was that they didn''t even reach his ankles, stopping about mid calf. Thankfully no one could see his hairy legs due to the bright white socks that went all the way up to his knees.

    At least his shoes were normal. So were his gloves, besides the comically large size of them.

    But the weirdest part was reserved for his face. First was the heart shaped glasses that hid his own heart shaped eyes. (AN: Yes, this is canon.) What was even worse was the man''s goatee, which wasn''t a goatee at all, but a mushroom that grew on his chin while he slept one day.

    He bit the head of it off, but was so disgusted, he just left the rest of it there. (AN: This is also canon) His hair was long and straight, coming to about his chin, and was grayish, blonde color. On top of said head was a navy blue fedora with gold trim along the base of the crown, with a shiny star right dab in the middle.

    This is Jango the Hypnotist, second in command of the Black Cat Pirates.

    "Well, at least you still know how to be punctual," stated Klahadore, fixing his glasses as he glared at the three approaching pirates.

    "Of course Boss. We''re always on time for a party," stated Sham with a shifty grin on his face.

    "Lucky you. As much as I''d love to hunt you down, there''s more pressing matters which require my attention," threatened the butler, causing the rest of them to shiver in fear. That was the last thing they wanted.

    "Something happen, Captain Kuro?" asked Jango, having moonwalked across the beach to reach his leader. Which would explain why he was the last one there.

    "I told you not to call me that anymore," stated Kuro. The others began to sweat at feeling the pressure their Captain was giving off. It was a sure sign he was unhappy, and an unhappy Kuro was a dangerous one.

    "S-sorry about that. Won''t happen again," stuttered out Jango. Kuro continued to glare at them for a few moments before he relented, making them sigh in relief. Honestly, they had thought living as a butler for these last few years would have dulled his killer instinct, but if anything the opposite has happened.

    It allowed him to hone it to a razor''s edge.

    "To answer your question, yes something has happened. We have a few new players in the game," Kuro claimed, fixing his glasses once more.

    "A few new players huh? They must be something to have you worried," mentioned Jango, scratching his mushroom beard.

    "No kidding. Who are they?" asked Buchi.

    "Nobodies mostly. However, they do claim Roronoa Zoro in their midst," Kuro said, which caught their attention.

    "Hang on, the bounty hunter? What''s he doing here?" asked Sham.

    "It appears as if he''s turned over a new leaf and became a pirate," said Kuro with some amusement. Ironic that he, a former pirate turned butler and soon to be millionaire, was facing off against a former bounty hunter turned pirate.

    The world sure was funny sometimes.

    "Seriously? Why would he do that?" asked Sham.

    "I haven''t a clue. But it is worth mentioning he doesn''t appear to be the Captain," Kuro told them. And wasn''t that a surprise, even for a man like him. Zoro had quite the reputation for his strength, so much so that even he has heard of him while playing the loyal butler.

    Kuro couldn''t say for sure that the man''s reputation was well earned, but it was best to err on the side of caution.

    This book was originally published on Royal Road. Check it out there for the real experience.

    "Can''t believe there''s someone who could tame that mad dog," claimed Buchi.

    "Is there anyone else we should be concerning ourselves with, besides the Pirate Hunter and his Captain?" asked Jango. And this is why Kuro put him in charge after him. For all his flamboyance, he was clever.

    "There is. A man and a woman. The man is nothing special, a thorn in the side and nothing more, but the girl is clever, if a bit cowardly. They shouldn''t prove much of an issue," Kuro said, much to their relief.

    "That''s good. You had me worried there for a second Captain," laughed Buchi, the giant oaf. Jango could feel another bead of sweat drip down his face as the pressure started forming again.

    "I see you are as simpleminded as ever," growled Kuro. That shut the man up. Kuro took a few moments to regain his composure, before asking a question.

    "Tell me, how fare our¡­ allies?"

    The three turned to look at each other, not entirely knowing what to say. "Spit it out already," demanded Kuro with impatience.

    "They''re getting a bit antsy. I can''t say for sure they''ll follow the plan," warned Jango. That made Kuro frown even deeper, though it wasn''t entirely unexpected. When dealing with pirates, one should always expect the unexpected.

    "I see. Then we''ll simply have to plan around them as well. So listen, and listen closely. I''ll not be repeating myself," stated Kuro, as he began to tell them his change in plans. The man with a thousand plans always had a backup or two just waiting to be used.

    *Line Break*

    "This is a red alert! I repeat this is a red alert! So look alive you fucking donkeys! I have never failed to satisfy a guest and I will not start today! Do you understand me!?" shouted the head chef of Kaya''s mansion, Ram Zee.

    "Yes Chef!" shouted the other cooks. There were four of them, with the head chef making five. It didn''t take much to keep Kaya herself fed, but they also had to deal with the bodyguards, whose numbers have swelled recently.

    But never in their careers have they faced a challenge so great, so daunting, as Monkey D. Luffy. No matter how much food they sent out, it was never enough. Plate after plate was served, but the orders never stopped.

    "How can he still be hungry!"

    "I can''t feel my legs!"

    "We''re out of meat! We''re out of meat!"

    "What do we do!? I wasn''t trained for this!"

    "None of us were!"

    "Shut the hell up, all of you!" shouted Ram Zee. He was just as exhausted as the rest of them, but he''s been through far worse circumstances than this. He once served food to a World Noble who didn''t like the taste, forcing him to flee for his life.

    People don''t survive after offending one of them, no matter how slight the offense might have been.

    "Listen to me and listen good you fucking halfwits! We''re chefs! It''s our job to feed someone when they''re hungry, and if I''m not mistaken, there''s someone up there who''s still hungry! So what does that mean?" yelled Ram Zee.

    The four cooks stared at each other, unsure of what to say.

    "Are you all fucking stupid!? If someone''s hungry, what do we do!? It''s not that fucking difficult, is it!?" screamed Ram Zee.

    They stood straighter, and a fierce gleam entered their eyes, "We feed them Chef!"

    "That''s fucking right you do! So get your asses back to your stations, and if I hear one more person complain, I''ll personally chop off your balls and feed them to our guests! Do you understand me!?"

    "Yes Chef!"

    "Good! Now get back to fucking work!"

    With renewed vigor, the cooks all started making food anew. The path ahead may be difficult, but they would see it through, no matter what. Because feeding hungry people is what chefs do!

    *Line Break*

    Luffy leaned back in his chair, patting his extended belly with satisfaction. He looked like he swallowed a whole dan beach ball. "Man, that was tasty."

    Kaya and Merry could only stare at the rubber man with a combination of disgust and confoundment. "Where does he put it all?" asked Kaya.

    "I have no idea my lady," responded Merry. The straw hat wearing youth ate more than all the others combined. Twice over! As impressive as it was, it was still disgusting to watch.

    "He has a rubber stomach," said Nick, finishing off the last of his own meal. He did agree with Luffy, the food was damn good. Much better than anything he''s ever had before, in this world or the last one.

    It was soured slightly by the fact that Klahadore didn''t even have the decency to show up. That jackass made them get all dolled up, and then had the nerve to take a midnight stroll?

    Although, maybe he should be grateful. Not like he wanted to deal with him in the first place, and he did get to see Nami in a sexy little dress.

    Yeah, it was probably for the best.

    "But it has to have some limit, doesn''t it?" asked Usopp. He wasn''t as shocked as Kaya or Merry, having seen him eating lunch earlier, but the amount of food he just ate dwarfed the meal they had at lunch.

    "Luffy''s stomach is just one of life''s many mysteries," commented Nami, who was doing her best to ignore the shenanigans around her.

    "When I first met him I had been starved for about three weeks, and he still managed to eat more than me," mentioned Zoro, as he took another swig of beer. He couldn''t help but feel like he lost something that day.

    "Are you serious?" asked Akisu with awe in his voice. As a young boy, he couldn''t help but be amazed by the disgusting act he just witnessed. It was just about the coolest thing ever. He was too suspicious of the group to truly appreciate the grotesque scene before, but now, he could fully marvel at the spectacle in front of him.

    "Not my fault you''re such a lightweight," snarked Luffy, giving Zoro a smug grin, much to the swordsman''s frustration. Not like he could do much about it. There wasn''t a snowball''s chance in hell of him beating Luffy in any type of eating contest.

    But maybe a drinking contest¡­

    "Ugh, boys," groaned Nami.

    Nick could only snicker at her revulsion. "Hey, girls can be gross too."

    "Careful. Don''t make me fine you," she said back. After that, the group descended into light hearted bickering, much to Kaya and Merry''s further confusion. But at the same time she couldn''t help but smile seeing Usopp getting along so well with them. He seemed to be fitting right in.

    It took them several minutes to finally calm down. Long enough that Luffy was asking about dessert. Talk about being a glutton. But with them all settled down, it was finally time for Kaya to begin explaining everything.

    "So, I''m sure by now you know all about the attacks. But what you probably don''t know is why," Kaya started, with everyone giving her their full attention. She gave Merry a nod, and the butler pulled out a letter.

    "I received this letter about a month ago, right before the attacks began, sent by someone calling himself the Bear King. He''s a fairly notorious pirate, I believe," she continued.

    "I''ve heard of him. But he hasn''t been seen in years. Heard he got his ass kicked and went into hiding," stated Zoro. Everyone looked confused as to why a pirate would be sending her a letter of all things.

    Especially Nick, who was racking his brain trying to figure out who the hell this guy was. But no matter how hard he tried, he just couldn''t place the name. Was he somebody new, or was he some kind of filler villain?

    "So, why did he send you this letter?" asked Nami. Kaya seemed to shrink in on herself at the question, looking like a tiny kitten trying to hide itself.

    "Oh, well¡­ Um, yes, about that," she stuttered, trying and failing to explain what the letter said.

    "Perhaps I should just read it?" suggested Merry, who received a grateful nod in response.

    "Ahem¡­"

    Dear Miss Kaya,

    I am pleased to cordially demand your hand in marriage. From the moment I first laid eyes on you, I knew you were the one for me. Should you refuse this generous opportunity, I will have no choice but to act swiftly and decisively. I hope to hear from you soon with good news. You have until your 18th birthday to respond. Afterward, I will have no choice but to force the issue, and that''s something I''m sure we''d all like to avoid.

    Sincerely,

    The Bear King

    The room was deathly silent as Merry read the letter. Nick really had no idea who this clown was now. And how do you cordially demand something like that. Guy had a few screws loose.

    Hopefully when they fought, and Nick knew they would, Luffy would handle the obviously crazy guy. But with a name like Bear King he might turn out to be a furry, and if that''s the case, then it might fall to him to deal with it.

    "Kaya, why didn''t you tell me about this?" asked Usopp, sounding genuinely hurt. Everyone there winced at the tone of his voice.

    "I''m sorry Usopp, I just didn''t want to worry you. And I could never seem to find the right time to bring it up," she said, though it didn''t do much to make Usopp feel better. If anything, it made him feel even worse.

    "Hang on. So this creep has been attacking the shipyard because you refused to marry him?" asked Nami in disbelief. She didn''t care how powerful or rich the so-called Bear King was, nothing entitled him to Kaya. She wasn''t a piece of property he could just decide belonged to him one day.

    She was really looking forward to kicking his ass now. Oh, and robbing him of course. She would make sure to take everything he owned for herself.

    "Well¡­ Not exactly. You see, I haven''t actually refused yet," Kaya said sheepishly. Everyone gave her a look like, "WTF".

    "Hang on. If you haven''t technically rejected him yet, why the attacks?" Nami asked.

    "Fear," said Nick, face set in stone. Everyone turned to look at him, waiting for his explanation.

    "Look, this whole ordeal has people shook, and I''m sure you''ve thought about what he would do if he was actually rejected. Would he attack you, the island? There''s no telling what he would do. Am I right?" Nick asked, to which Kaya nodded in response.

    "That''s exactly the point. He made you afraid to reject him."

    Having said his piece, the others looked contemplative. Well, everyone except for Luffy, who just looked around confused.

    "So when exactly is your birthday?" Nami asked Kaya.

    "Tomorrow¡­"

    "Of course it is."

    The room grew silent once again as everybody began thinking over the information shared. However, one such individual was not nearly so brooding.

    "So what''s the problem? All we have to do is beat him up right?" asked Luffy.

    "It''s not that simple," said Nami like she was speaking to a five year old.

    "It''s not?" Luffy asked again, giving her a confused look. That brought her up short, as everyone thought over what Luffy said. It really was that simple.

    "Huh, maybe it is that simple¡­" conceded Nami, somewhat reluctantly.

    "Leave it to Luffy to put things into perspective," stated Zoro with amusement. Not like this information really changed anything. They always knew they had to fight someone, now they just had a name.

    "Good thing he''s here to remind us of the simple solutions," mentioned Nick with his own grin. The whole Bear King thing really threw him off, since he was sure it was that damn butler who was behind everything. But even if he did have a hand in this, all they would have to do is beat him up as well.

    "You''re welcome," Luffy said with a happy smile. He wasn''t exactly sure about what he did, but he was happy to help.

    "So if the deadline is tomorrow, then lover boy will likely make an appearance," Nick stated, the atmosphere of the room turning serious. Everyone nodded at his statement, reaching the same conclusion as him.

    "Alright, in that case, here''s the plan."

    With that said, Nick began laying out what he thought was the best plan of action. He only hoped it would be enough to deal with whatever bullshit was about to happen.

 Chapter 24

    Crickets chirped loudly and somewhat annoyingly as the moon drifted lazily across the sky. Nick felt himself shiver slightly as the cool night air gently caressed his skin with soft, tender touches. As good as the breeze felt, he could do with it being a bit less nippy.

    The man in front of him, one Roronoa Zoro, didn''t seem to notice the cold at all, having trained his body to resist the paltry attempts of nature to influence him.

    The jacket he wore helped too.

    The pair of them were currently heading toward the docks ready and willing to put a stop to the attacks, with or without extreme prejudice. Considering this was the final night before the deadline, it was highly likely they would perform one last hurrah.

    Too bad for them, it would never come to pass. Not so long as Nick and Zoro were on the job. However, as powerful as they were, there was one foe who''s might they may not be able to overcome.

    And that was Zoro''s sense of direction.

    Seriously, how was it possible for somebody to get lost walking in a straight fucking line? Nick''s had to recover the wandering samurai several times now, and one of those times he made it all the way back to the mansion!

    And twice to their boat!

    So now he walked behind him, forcefully moving him in the right direction, much to Zoro''s chagrin. The green haired bastard even had the nerve to blame Nick for them getting lost.

    So what should have taken them about ten minutes to accomplish took them nearly a whole goddamn hour. Nick was exhausted before the battle even started. If he got his ass kicked, he was blaming Zoro.

    "Finally, we''re here," muttered Nick with dead eyes, as he came to stand beside his companion. The gentle crashing of the waves greeted him like an old friend as they stood at the entrance of the shipyards.

    "Would have gotten here faster if you didn''t keep wandering off," said Zoro. Nick''s left eye gained a manic twitch as he slowly and robotically turned to face the swordsman.

    "Excuse me? What did you say?" he whispered in anger and disbelief. He wasn''t sure which emotion was more prominent, but he was leaning toward the first one.

    "You heard me. Who gets lost walking in a straight line?" asked Zoro, voice dripping with sarcasm as he threw Nick''s thoughts about him right back in his face. Nick took deep breaths to try and calm himself as Zoro began walking further into the shipyard.

    It took him several moments to get his righteous anger under control, but once he did, he followed after the swordsman, knowing that if he didn''t, the bastard would just end up lost again.

    And they couldn''t afford to waste anymore time. So even though Nick wanted nothing more than to strangle the man, he had more important things to worry about. His mind drifted towards the others who were guarding the mansion, or more specifically, Kaya.

    The plan Nick came up with was fairly simple, as he figured a complicated one would be too difficult for Luffy to follow. The man practically lived by the motto, "Keep it simple stupid."

    Not that Nick had a problem with that, as simplicity had its place. Like Luffy stating all they had to do was beat up the bad guy. A simple solution to a not so simple problem. So why complicate it further? They just needed to hand out a good old fashioned ass whooping like it was candy on Halloween.

    And Nick loved Halloween. Of course, that just made him think of Nami in one of those outfits with the "Slutty" tag written on it. Like a nurse, or a cop, or a cat girl. Now that was some candy he could get behind.

    Literally.

    Back on topic, they split their forces. Nick and Zoro went to the docks to try and catch the ones responsible for the copious amounts of arson, while the others stayed behind and safeguarded Kaya.

    If they showed their faces there, then Luffy would punch them in said face until their own mothers wouldn''t recognize them. Afterwards, Nami could happily rob their possibly dead bodies.

    Win-win for everybody. Well, except for the bad guys, but fuck them.

    And Usopp would be there as well. Nick wasn''t sure how useful he would be, but at the very least, he could prove to be a decent meat shield. Plus, Nick was sure Kaya felt a bit more at ease with him around, and he wouldn''t begrudge the poor girl of that.

    However, when Nick told them the plan, some of them took issue with it. And by some of them, he means Luffy. The little bugger threw one hell of a hissy fit..

    "Why do I have to stay here!? I want to kick their ass!"

    Dear god he could be loud when he wanted. But more to the point, Nick didn''t know who this Bear King guy was, but the chances of him being in cahoots with Klahadore was too high to ignore. And while Nick was pretty sure Zoro could handle the butler, he wasn''t willing to take that risk, no matter how small it may have been.

    Why gamble when he knew Luffy could beat him?

    So if that sneaky fuck of a butler decides to make his move before the deadline in the letter, they had their best waiting in the wings to take him out. And if lover boy showed up, Luffy could just kick his ass too.

    Nice and simple.

    But still, he couldn''t help the swell of anxiety that rose from the pit of his stomach. Dealing with Buggy showed him that this is not some carefree shonen world where death is often an off screen consequence.

    No, it was very real, with very real stakes involved. Syrup Village was another one of those arcs with a somewhat joke villain. The guy chose a cat motif for his pirate crew for goodness sake! How could you take that guy seriously?

    Sure, they said he was supposed to be super smart or whatever, but how smart was it to play dress up with your crew?

    Not to mention the Michael Jackson ripoff. Top that sundae off with a long nosed liar who exaggerated things to a ridiculous degree and you had one funny tasting dessert. It should have been a quick, beat the asshole and move on kind of island.

    To be fair, it still kind of was, but now there was a new asshole to deal with, one Nick has never heard of. Who knows what he was capable of. If he could use Haki, they were royally screwed.

    In a normal story, you don''t often have the hero face off against a threat they can''t beat, unless they were never meant to beat them in the first place. Oftentimes, that led to some kind of tragedy that spurred them on. Home destroyed, family dead, lover kidnapped; that sort of thing.

    But this wasn''t a story anymore, and as much as Nick loved a good, tragic backstory, that doesn''t mean he wanted to be part of one. Tragedy wasn''t nearly as compelling when it involved the people you know.

    "Quit worrying about the others. Focus on the here and now," chastised Zoro, not turning back to look at his traveling companion. Nick raised an eyebrow at the man''s back, slightly unnerved by how easy he was to read.

    "What are you psychic now?" Nick joked, trying to ease the tension he felt. It worked, somewhat, but the feeling refused to leave completely.

    "Tsk, I can practically hear your thoughts. Luffy''s with them, they''ll be fine. So get your head out of the clouds."

    "Aw, you do care," swooned Nick, much to the swordsman''s chagrin. The scruffy other-worlder snickered a bit at Zoro''s mumbled griping. But he did feel a bit better about the whole thing.

    Unauthorized usage: this tale is on Amazon without the author''s consent. Report any sightings.

    So this is what having real friends is like. Nick could get used to it. Far better than the fair weather assholes he''s surrounded himself with up until this point. The kind who only cared about how your friendship benefited them.

    And the green haired man was right. There was nothing he could do now but play his own part and worrying excessively over the others, mostly Nami, wouldn''t do him any good. Best to just focus on not getting the shit kicked out of him again.

    God help him if these guys had a bear with them too. Actually, they were cats weren''t they? So does that mean he would have to deal with another lion instead? Or maybe the so-called Bear King had one? Nick sincerely hoped not. One was more than enough, thank you very much.

    The two of them continued on their way through the familiar landscape of the shipyard, and Nick only had to steer Zoro in the right direction twice so far. It was somewhat eerie, with the light from the moon blocked by some clouds and with just how fucking quiet it was.

    Not to mention the blood trails on the ground. Really added to the whole horror vibe they were going with here.

    ¡­Hang on, something about that didn''t seem quite right.

    The pair stopped in their tracks, and Zoro knelt down to inspect the ground. "Blood," he stated simply, confirming Nick''s fears. Looking around, he spotted several more trails just like the one in front of them, all heading in the same direction.

    "Shit. Looks like we were too late," said Nick. What he didn''t say was whose fault it was. Next time he would tie a piece of rope to the swordsman and drag him down the right path like a dog on a leash.

    "Damn it," muttered Zoro as he stood up. The duo then began following the path of the blood, quickly but cautiously as it led them straight to none other than Pett''s ship. But as they neared it, the clouds parted, giving way to a radiant burst of moonlight, shining down on the world below.

    And what they saw made their blood run cold.

    Dangling from the mast like they were sails were several figures, rope tied around their necks, lifeless bodies gently swaying in the evening breeze. Dried blood covered their bodies, with small puddles coalescing beneath them.

    And if that wasn''t bad enough, they could see Pett himself, crucified against the center mast. They couldn''t make out too many details from this distance, but what they could see didn''t paint a pretty picture.

    "What the fuck¡­" muttered Nick in disbelief, eyes wide at the sight. Nick knew dealing with pirates was a messy business, considering his own brief experience with them, but seeing if from the outside was a different experience entirely.

    "That''s one way to get someone''s attention. Bastards," growled out Zoro, hand gripping a sword in anger. He would make them pay for this.

    "No kidding," whispered Nick, feeling a bit ill from the sight. "We should check to see if they''re still alive."

    "Right," Zoro agreed, though he doubted anyone was still breathing. And if they were, they probably wished they weren''t. "Don''t let your guard down."

    "Didn''t plan on it," Nick said. He doubted he could even if he wanted to. His whole body felt wired, like he drank 1,000 Red Bulls and got actual fucking wings from the damn things. His eyes hyper focused on every movement, no matter how small, and his ears twitched at every sound, no matter how faint.

    The pair quickly but cautiously made their way onto the boat, knowing it was likely a trap. How could it not be? But they had little choice but to fall right into it.

    Actually, they could run like hell in the other direction, but neither one even considered that option. Both wanted revenge for the barbaric treatment of the dock workers. Violence such as that must be met with equal or greater violence. It was basic math.

    Especially Zoro, who recognized two of them as the men he had drinks with when he first got here. His eyes narrowed in fury at the sight of them hanging there. They were good men who didn''t deserve this.

    The smell of blood and death grew exponentially with every step they took onto the ship. Every instinct telling them to go the other direction, but they ignored it.

    Barely audible breathing could be heard as they neared the crucified man. It was labored, desperate, the sound making Nick wince from second hand misery. He was glad the man was still alive, but the sound was awful.

    His body was lacerated in several spots, his body looking like it lost a fight with a bobcat, which might not be too far off the mark. The visible parts of his body were swollen and bruised, showing clear signs of torture.

    But the worst part was his hands. Arms raised above his head, both hands nailed together to the mast, fingers twitching sporadically. His midsection was tied to the mast by a rope, which was likely the only thing holding him up.

    Nick wasn''t sure the man was even conscious. It would probably be better if he wasn''t, considering his condition. But he was also pretty sure it was a bad thing to be asleep if he had a concussion, and given the lump on his head and the blood dripping from it, that was a pretty good bet.

    "Pett. Hey Pett," whispered Nick, trying to get the man''s attention. But it was no use, he was clearly too out of it. The only response he got was a fluttering of his closed eyes.

    "We need to get him out of here," said Nick, reaching up to rip out the nail. Usually when someone was bleeding as bad as he was it would be better to leave it in, so he didn''t bleed to death, but considering it was literally trapping him there, Nick felt he had little choice.

    "Hang on," commanded Zoro. Nick looked back at the man, only to see him glaring up at the rest of the victims, swaying in the wind.

    "For what?" Nick asked incredulously. He too shifted his gaze towards the other men, the ones who were almost certainly dead. And that''s when he noticed something rather concerning.

    There was a missing body. In its place was an empty noose, gently swaying back and forth, mocking them.

    When they boarded the ship, there were seven bodies put on display. Four on one side of the mast, and three on the other. But now, there were three on both sides. One of them went awol.

    Well fuck. Does that mean they were dealing with zombies, because that was not on his to do list for the evening. Or ever, if he was honest.

    Hang on¡­ Wasn''t there an island with zombies on it or something? Nick was pretty sure he saw an amv like that. You know it''s Thriller! Thriller night! If that bootleg copy of Michael''s shows up, he was going to lose it.

    Zoro gripped the handle on one of his katana, ready to draw it at a moment''s notice as he scanned the area for their missing body. Nick doing the same, hoping he didn''t hear the sound of something moaning for brains.

    What he did hear might have actually been worse. It was the sound of crying. But not just any crying, oh no, that would be too easy. It was the sound of crying coming from the dearly departed. Of a ghost trying to lure in children to be its next meal.

    It sounded like that witch from that game. Nick struggled to remember the name. It was just so long ago. Left for¡­ Head? No, that sounded like a porn parody. But it was something like that. Left for¡­ Dead! That was it! Left for Dead.

    He remembered playing it with some friends before, you know, the ones who hated stormy weather, and while going through a level, mowing down zombies like it was going out of style, they heard the sound of crying.

    Just like now. Only it turned out to be some crazy bitch who murdered them all in a frenzy. Scared the shit out of him. He most certainly did not Rule 34 her in revenge. Nope, not him.

    The rest of the internet though¡­ He couldn''t speak for those bunch of weirdos.

    And that was the sound he heard right now, only slightly more masculine, but it still sent shivers down his spine.

    "What the hell is that?" asked Zoro.

    "Whatever it is, I''m pretty sure it''s telling us to leave," said Nick, with sweat dripping down his brow. He did not want to fuck with whatever was making that creep ass noise. Even if it wasn''t some kind of zombie, witch demon, it still sounded like something that wanted to tickle him on the inside.

    "Don''t be such a wuss and help me find the damn thing," muttered Zoro, but Nick wasn''t fooled. Not by a long shot. It was clear Zoro was a little freaked out as well. He could only imagine how Usopp would handle this.

    He''d probably play dead.

    "I''d really rather not," Nick complained, but complied nonetheless. But he did have to wonder just what was going on with this arc that he now had to deal with some kind of ghostly abomination. It wasn''t right.

    As the two of them walked towards the sound of the voice, the wailing only got louder. Big shocker. They walked up some steps, towards the back of the ship, and wouldn''t you know it, that''s where it was. Hunched over and creepy as fuck.

    It looked like a man. A very tall man, rocking himself back and forth, facing away from them and towards the ocean. Nick could barely make out the green hair of the individual in the dark, but it was there.

    Who did he know that had green hair? Besides Zoro that is. He was pretty sure one of Klahadore''s minions had green hair, but he wasn''t positive.

    "Who the hell are you and what are you doing here?" asked Zoro, threateningly. The man stopped rocking, but didn''t answer the question. He just sat there, as quiet as a mouse in a house full of cats.

    "Didn''t you hear me? I said, who the hell are you?" Zoro repeated. Nick was starting to get even more nervous, as a cold gust of wind danced along his skin, making him shiver.

    "He''s coming¡­" said the figure in front of them, slowly turning towards them.

    "Huh? Who''s coming?" asked Zoro. It was clear from his tone he was getting sick of whatever game the other man was playing, and was just about to carve him up to save himself the trouble of having to deal with him.

    And honestly, Nick would let him. Dude in front of them was giving off some serious serial killer vibes, and he didn''t want to be his next victim.

    "The bad man¡­" responded the guy. They could now see his face, which had tear streaks running down it, falling in rivers from red, puffy eyes.

    "What bad man? Wait, you don''t mean uncle Jim-Bob do you!?" Nick shouted with horror. The two green haired men gave him confused looks that would be the textbook definition of WTF. Nick coughed into his hand and looked away with a blush on his face.

    "Never mind. Forget I said anything."

    "Listen, I don''t have time for this bullshit. Either tell me who you are or I''ll carve you like a pumpkin," Zor threatened. Again. Nick was starting to wonder if that was the only way he knew how to communicate.

    The man opened his mouth to speak, but his eyes widened in fear and he pointed behind them, "The bad man! He''s right there!"

    Zoro, sensing danger, quickly drew his sword, doing so right in the nick of time. His sword met something, a loud clang ringing out across the docks.

    The battle for Syrup Village had officially begun.

 Chapter 25

    Zoro glared at the man in front of him as he pushed down on his blade. "And just who the hell are you supposed to be?" Zoro asked, as the two of them struggled for dominance. He was strong, that was for certain, and his size gave that strength even greater weight; his height matched only by his girth.

    "Who, me? You may call me Buchi. I''m a member of the Black Cat Pirates," Buchi said, giving the smaller man a cocky grin. "And I''ve heard all about you, Roronoa Zoro."

    "That right?" Zoro responded. Not like this was the first time someone has come looking to challenge him after hearing of his reputation. He was a pretty popular guy after all. But just like the others, this asshole would find himself six feet underground.

    "Oh yes. They say you''re quite the swordsman, but I don''t see it," Buchi mocked, much to Zoro''s chagrin. He''d show this smug, cat faced, mouth breather just how strong he was. There was just one thing he wanted to know beforehand.

    "Tell me. Are you the one responsible for this?" he asked, indicating the corpses put on display above him. Buchi glanced at them for a moment before a twisted smile graced his face.

    "Do you like it? I thought this ship could do with some redecorating."

    "You''re one sick bastard, you know that?" Zoro growled, as he pushed even harder against the steel claws threatening to cut him, just like the poor saps dangling front he mast.

    "I prefer to think of myself as an artist," Buchi said with his same psychotic grin. He licked his lips just thinking about the exhibit he put on display. He was quite proud of this one. It was just too bad the swordsman and his little buddy weren''t around to hear the screams of his victims. Those were what truly completed the piece.

    Music at its finest.

    The large man was clearly sick in the head and had the strength of a bull on meth. But that wasn''t the main issue assailing the swordsman at the moment. No, he was facing something much, much worse.

    "Damn your breath stinks," Zoro griped, wrinkling his nose in disgust. That just so happened to be his biggest problem. The stench of his breath felt like getting slapped in the face by a pimp with all four rings on his fingers.

    But the enormous man didn''t seem bothered in the least by the accusation. In fact, he seemed highly amused by it, "Oh really? What does it smell like?" he asked, expelling a large, hot, moist breath right in Zoro''s face.

    The poor guy''s face nearly matched the color of his own hair, "Like you eat ass for a living. Ugh, I think I''m going to be sick¡­" he groaned. The smell was a combination of rotten eggs, sewage, and onions. So many onions. Zoro was convinced the man had never brushed his teeth in his entire life. The very thought was likely an offense to him.

    "Ah, that''s too bad. Maybe it was something I ate?" the massive man questioned, as he pressed down harder on Zoro, who was starting to buckle. The putrid smell sapping him of his strength. His arms shook as the claws of his opponent drew ever closer. Their faces were inches away from each other now.

    Nick stared at the ongoing confrontation with concern and confusion in equal measure. Concern, because it looked like Zoro was getting overpowered. Which wasn''t that surprising, the other guy was fucking huge! But it was still unexpected.

    The confusion came from him trying to place who the other guy in the shitty cat cosplay was. He looked familiar, sort of, in that he was sure he appeared in the show kind of way. You know, the kind that appeared for an episode or two before getting an ass whooping and are never heard from again.

    That was him, he was sure of it. Some villain of the week who faded into obscurity once his meager relevance had run its course.

    Of course, none of that prevented him from making a snarky one liner as he noticed how close the two of them were getting, "Hey Zoro! Are you going to kiss him or kill him?"

    "Screw you! As if anyone would kiss a guy with breath this bad!"

    Nick chuckled. If Zoro could still bicker, then he was fine. "So, is this the bad man?" he asked, turning to face the other man on the boat. For a split second, he could have sworn he saw a malicious smile on his face, but it was replaced by the image of a sniveling beta male so fast, he thought his mind may have been playing a trick on him.

    "Y-yes, that''s him. He''s the one who hurt all those poor people," he simpered, snot coming out of his nose. His tone grated on Nick''s ears, but there was something else about him. Something familiar that put him on edge. It was like the big fucker over there.

    Man, he wished he had a better memory. He recognized the big guy, and the name he used rang a bell. But there was something else. He just couldn''t remember what. What he did know, is that the guy behind him was sus as fuck.

    "Hey, what''s your name?"

    "W-who? Me?" he sniveled. He looked so frightened, Nick almost felt bad for the guy. But for some reason, the cynical part of his brain was picking up on high levels of bullshit. He was faking, the whole act of his was a sham.

    Nick''s eyes widened as the hamster in his brain came back to life like a Frankenstein monster and started running on the wheel again. Slowly, but it was still turning. That was it! His name is Sham. Just like his acting. Everything was starting to make sense.

    Looking at the man with realization, the man Nick now knew as Sham ceased his act, and the sinister smile Nick thought was a mirage bloomed onto his face once more. "Seems like you figured it out. But you''re too late!"

    WIth that shout, Sham jumped to his feet and began sprinting at Zoro, intending to backstab him, like a bitch.

    "Shit! Zoro!" Nick shouted. How could he be so stupid!? Looking at the rather effeminate appearing man, it was obvious who he was. And now, he had a clear shot at Zoro''s unprotected back.

    Nick had to reach him in time, so he launched himself into a sprint of his own, intending on catching the cat man like he was animal control. But the other guy was fast. Too fast. Nick had no way of catching up.

    A memory came bubbling to the surface. One of Zoro, facing off against the greatest swordsman in the world. His arms spread wide, a grim look of acceptance on his face. When asked what he was doing, Zoro said a few words that stuck with Nick, even after all this time.

    "Scars on the back, are a swordsman''s shame!"

    Damn it! As much as the guy was a pain in the ass with a sense of direction that bordered on the impossible, he was still his friend. And before all this, he was Nick''s favorite character.

    Well, it was between him and Robin to be honest. Zoro was that cool, strong character that was just an all round bad ass. And Robin had that dry, morbid sense of humor that he always liked.

    That, and she was smoking hot. Honestly, if he hadn''t met Nami first, he would have tried with her. Hm¡­ maybe if he played his cards right¡­

    No, that was a bad idea. If he managed to get with Nami before then, he doubted his testicles would survive him trying to get a harem. And he liked his testicles very much. Best to let that sleeping dog lay deep in the recesses of his horny little mind.

    But back to more important matters, Zoro was about to be shamed, and Nick couldn''t allow that to happen. He would get to him in time, no matter what it took!

    Unknowing to Nick, a power surged from deep within him in response to his determination and will. As he pushed himself off the ground with his right foot, the wooden deck beneath him cracked and splintered from the force, and Nick moved faster than he ever thought possible.

    Having heard his companion shout his name, Zoro turned his head to see what the fuss was about, only for his eyes to widen at the sight of the weeping weakling from earlier with his hand raised and ready to strike him in the back.

    "Do it brother!" shouted Buchi with glee, having been watching the exchange the whole time. This was it, their plan to take out the Three Sword Style user in one blow. It was just as their Captain had predicted. Everything was going according to plan.

    Until of course, it wasn''t.

    "I''ve got you!" screamed Sham, as he raised his now clawed hand over his head, intending on racking it across Zoro''s back. Unfortunately for him, his plan would be foiled by a brown haired interloper.

    Just as he was about to claw Zoro, a figure appeared in his way, taking the hit intended for the green haired swordsman. "Ah!" he screamed in pain, as four claw marks appeared across his back, spraying blood across the deck.

    Thankfully, as he had been unknowingly using a small amount or Armament Haki to strengthen himself, the cut wasn''t nearly as deep as it could have been. It was the only thing that saved his life.

    "Nick!" Zoro yelled in concern. The guy may have been a pain in the ass with a sense of direction that bordered the impossible, but he was still his friend. He growled in anger at seeing him hurt.

    And no small amount of shame for needing to be saved. It made him feel weak, and that was a feeling he hated more than anything.

    Drawing on his own strength, Zoro flung Buchi''s arms into the air, and spartan kicked him out of the way. The fat man went flying across the ship before rolling to a stop. Zoro immediately turned and took a swing at the other man, who was clearly an enemy.

    Unfortunately, the green haired cat bastard jumped out of the way, deftly avoiding the strike. With his foes now a good distance away, Zoro grabbed Nick as he collapsed forward, holding the other man against him.

    "Hey, you alright?" he asked in concern. He knew the guy was tough, having seen the damage he could take when he fought Mohji in Orange Town, but those claws were fairly long, and there was no telling just how much damage they could have done.

    The blood coating his hand seemed to confirm his thoughts.

    "Peachy. How are you?" Nick ground out with as much sarcasm as he could muster. Zoro snorted at the attempt at humor. If he could joke around like an asshole, he was probably fine.

    "What the hell were you thinking?" Zoro asked, glaring down at his companion. A look that only deepened when he heard the other man''s chuckling. Just what the hell was so funny?

    "I was thinking that I''m not a swordsman," Nick responded, which confused the hell out of Zoro. What did that have to do with anything?

    "No shit," Zoro said, which only amused Nick even further.

    "So a few scars on my back aren''t a problem," he finished, making Zoro''s eyes widen in absolute shock. That was why? Nick did that, suffered such an injury, just to save his pride?

    Zoro clenched his fists in a combination of anger, shame, and gratitude. He was angry at the ones who did this, ashamed of his own weakness that allowed it to happen, and grateful for his friend''s sacrifice.

    "I see¡­ Thanks. I''ll make sure to avenge you," Zoro said quietly, a look of renewed determination on his face.

    "I''m not dead yet, asshole," Nick remarked, stepping away from Zoro with a small wince from the movement. Damn did those cat scratches sting.

    "Well isn''t this a touching scene of camaraderie? But you should really pay attention to your surroundings!" Buchi yelled from behind Zoro. Without turning around, Zoro blocked the offending claws with ease.

    "W-what the?" stammered Buchi, as he tried to overpower the smaller man. But no matter how much force he exerted, Zoro refused to budge an inch. Something that Buchi couldn''t understand.

    Just a minute ago he was able to overwhelm the famed swordsman, and he was using both hands then! So why couldn''t he do the same now? It didn''t make any sense!

    "How are you doing this!? What are you!?" Buchi shouted in frustration. Zoro turned his head, eyes narrowed in a dangerous glare, promising pain and retribution to whoever was caught in its gaze.

    Buchi gulped, seeing as it was him ensnared by the promise of death the other man''s eyes proclaimed. He felt paralyzed, as Zoro seemingly grew in size, towering over him. The presence he gave off made him feel like prey trapped by a predator.

    Fear overruling his senses, Buchi jumped backwards, gaining several feet of distance away from the other man. Sweat dripped down his brow, the smell of fear permeating every pour as it did so.

    "Hey Buchi! What''s wrong with you?" asked Sham in confusion. He was just about to launch his own surprise attack again when his brother hightailed it out of there.

    "S-something''s up with this guy. Maybe we should get out of here?" begged the scaredy cat. Even though the green haired swordsman returned to his normal stature, Buchi couldn''t shake the feeling of overwhelming dread the other man made him feel.

    "Are you crazy? You know what the Captain does to traitors," stated Sham. Those words snapped Buchi out of he fear induced paranoia, introducing a whole new fear for him to endure.

    His brother was right. Anything this guy did to them would pale in comparison to the horrors their Captain would bestow upon them. Knowing this, Buchi slapped himself in the face with both hands, trying to force the remaining terror from his system.

    "Right, I''m good now. Let''s do this!" he shouted at his brother.

    "I think you scared the literal shit out of him," Nick commented glibly. And if he didn''t, it sure looked like it. Smelled like it too. Or was that just the stench of fear? Maybe just his breath? Either way, it stunk.

    "All I did was look at him," Zoro said, as if that absolved him of any wrongdoing. Not that what he did was wrong. Hell, he could have sliced the guy in two, from balls to brains, and he would have been in the right.

    "You are one scary mother fucker, you know that?" Nick said with dull, sarcastic eyes. It was clear, by the flattered look on his face, that Zoro was incapable of understanding sarcasm. Or maybe he just had selective hearing?

    "Know anything about these guys?" Zoro asked, staring at the two cat themed pirates, waiting for them to make their move. They both had an eager look on their face, as they prepared their next course of action.

    "Think so. Shamu and Bitchy, the Marzipan Brothers. Kind of weird the skinny one is called Shamu. You''d think it would be the fat one," Nick told him. Which was apparently the wrong thing to say, as the two felines became incensed.

    "What did you say!? We''re Sham and Buchi, the Meowban Brothers, not the Marzipan Brothers you idiot!" shouted Sham.

    "Wait, seriously? You call me an idiot, but you actually chose to call yourselves that? You''re taking this cosplay thing a bit too serious don''t you think?" Nick taunted, further increasing their ire. Steam could be practically seen spurting out of their ears.

    "I think you made them mad," Zoro commented with a bored stare.

    "Really? Was it something I said?" asked Nick in a fake innocent tone.

    "Might''ve had something to do with it," Zoro responded amused.

    "You think you can get away with making fun of us!?" shouted Buchi.

    "Sure do," responded Nick.

    "That''s it! Now you''re gonna-"

    But before Buchi could finish throwing his temper tantrum, a wet, ragged cough caught their attention. Everyone turned and stared at Pett, watching as he struggled to take in air. Blood shot from his mouth, applying a second coat to the deck.

    "Shit, I think his lungs are filling with blood," mentioned Nick, worry plastered on his face. It was clear the man didn''t have much time left. If they didn''t act soon, it would be too late. Nick didn''t know the man very well, and neither did Zoro, but they didn''t want him to die such a gruesome death.

    "I can''t believe he''s still alive. But it looks like the old guy''s on his last legs," mentioned Sham, his previous angry face twisted in a malicious sneer. Buchi''s expression was similar, as he licked his lips watching the man dying in front of them.

    "Ah, he was a bit annoying. Kept telling me to stop hurting his men. But that stopped once the nails started going in. Then all he did was scream. Nyahaha!" laughed Buchi, as Zoro and Nick''s expressions morphed into ones of anger.

    "You''ll be the one screaming when I''m done with you," growled Zoro, hand clenching his sword so tight his knuckles turned white.

    "No, he won''t be screaming at all. He''ll be dead," corrected Nick. Their threats only seemed to amuse the pair of pirates.

    "Oh really? Let''s see you try it then!" shouted Buchi, who once again charged at Zoro. The man in question brought his sword down, intending to cut the large pirate in half, but his sword was blocked by the man''s claws again.

    Sham himself wasn''t idle during this, as he sped towards Zoro''s unprotected back once more. Thrusting his hand forward, all four fingers straight turning his arm into a spear, he intended to skewer the green haired man.

    But that man wasn''t alone and had an equally pissed off partner watching his back. Sham''s attack was halted just inches away from Zoro''s back by a hand grasping onto his wrist. Wincing from the pressure, he turned to see none other than Nick, looking at him with an expression that promised pain.

    It wasn''t nearly as potent as Zoro''s own stare, but it still made a bead of sweat roll down Sham''s back.

    "Is attacking someone from behind all you know how to do?" asked Nick, condescension dripping from his mouth. But Sham wasn''t insulted, not one little bit. In fact, his mouth formed a massive grin.

    "Is running your mouth all you know how to do?" Sham shot back. Nick''s eye twitched from the admittedly good burn. He wasn''t going to tell him that though. Instead, he would just quietly place it on the back burner, ready to be plagiarized at a moment''s notice.

    Nick opened his mouth to run it some more, if for no other reason than to spite the man, but before he could, Sham shot his foot out, kicking the back of Zoro''s two sheathed swords, sending them flying.

    "What the-" Zoro exclaimed, not expecting the attack at all.

    "Now Buchi!" yelled Sham.

    "Come to papa!" yelled the larger of the two brothers. He disengaged from Zoro, dodging his strike in the process, and managed to catch his two swords. He gave the swordsman a smarmy grin as he held up the blades, shaking his wrists and taunting him.

    Not exactly something Nick would advise. Zoro was mad enough as it is and taking his stuff seemed like a good way to get some body parts chopped off. Especially with the way he was fondling them.

    The swords, not his body parts.

    "Lookie what I got. Just what I''ve always wanted!" laughed Buchi, as Zoro growled in response.

    "Bastard! Get your hands off! I don''t know where they''ve been!"

    "I do," Nick said, indicating the corpses swaying above them.If you spot this tale on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.

    "Damn it¡­ Now I''ll have to disinfect them¡­" Zoro grumbled.

    Distracted as he was by what just happened, and the ensuing commentary, Nick was barely able to dodge the surprise attack coming at his face, courtesy of one Sham.

    "Whoa!" he shouted, releasing his hold on the cat man''s wrist and leaning his head back, claws coming within centimeters of raking across his face. And he loved his face! It was just so darn handsome.

    "Watch it asshole! You could have ruined my beautiful face!" he shouted.

    "What did you expect? This is a fight to the death," Sham stated, with more than a hint of condescension. After all, what fool thought he could go into such a battle and come out the other side unscathed?

    "Maybe. But unlike you, I''ll live long enough to face the consequences of this battle," Nick shot back. He thought it was a pretty good line, and judging by the stunned silence he received, they did too.

    "...I''m going to enjoy making your face all red," Sham said with a grin, licking his lips like his brother. Something that made Nick shiver with revulsion.

    "...Are you coming on to me? Because, not gonna lie, I''m a little insulted. I can do way better than you. And besides, Zoro and I are in the middle of our own bromance right now. I''d thank you not to get in the middle of that," Nick said, backing away from him.

    Sham''s eye started twitching along with his clawed hands, "Why, you¡­"

    "What the hell are you babbling about now?" Zoro questioned, though his eyes never left Buchi, who kept up his dopey smile.

    "I thought we were having a little moment back there. Don''t tell me you didn''t feel it," Nick said.

    "I didn''t feel it," Zoro deadpanned, breaking Nick''s heart. He grasped at his chest dramatically, as if he was suffering a heart attack. Zoro rolled his eyes at the other man''s antics, but he had more important things to worry about.

    "Whatever. Listen, I''m going to get my swords back. You stay here and play with that freak over there," Zoro said, indicating Sham with a movement of his head, infuriating the other green haired man even further.

    "Might be hard to cut through all that blubber with only one sword," Nick idly speculated, his words making the other brother infuriated. They now had two pissed off cats to deal with.

    "And whose fault is it he has my swords in the first place?" Zoro asked, giving Nick a side eyed glare. Hearing this accusation, Nick spun around, giving Zoro a look of disbelief. It was just like the direction thing all over again!

    "Are you blaming me for this too!?" he shouted, making Zoro now turn to face him completely as well.

    "Damn right. You were the one fighting him, you should have been paying more attention," Zoro chided. Nick gained a tick mark on his head, as he glared right back at the stubborn swordsman.

    "And how the hell was I supposed to know he was going to kick the damn things? I mean, who does that? And besides, is that the way you treat someone who saved your ass? Twice!" Nick yelled. But Zoro was having none of it.

    "All I''m hearing are excuses. Besides, I had it covered. You just got in the way," Zoro said, turning away from him. Part of the man felt guilty for his words, considering Nick did get injured protecting his pride as a swordsman.

    But it was that same pride that prevented him from accepting his mistake. The truth is, he should have been paying more attention to the other combatant. It was a rookie mistake to place all his attention on the fat one. He would remember the lesson, even though he may never admit to having learned it in the first place.

    "Oh, so it''s my fault is it? Fine, if that''s the way you want it, then I''ll just have to correct my mistake," Nick said, as he stomped off towards the bewildered looking Buchi, who was watching them bicker, along with his brother, completely ignoring the two.

    It was rather insulting, to be seen as so little a threat they could just ignore them to argue with each other. They''ll just have to teach them a valuable lesson on battlefield etiquette.

    "And where do you think you''re going?" asked Zoro, as Nick walked past him.

    "What''s it look like? I''m going to get your stupid swords back," Nick said as he sauntered off.

    "Wha- Hey! I don''t need your help! I can get them back on my own! And don''t call them stupid!" Zoro shouted, moving to intercept his ally.

    "Oh no, it''s all my fault they got taken, remember? That makes it my responsibility to get them back. So just wait there like a good little boy while daddy takes care of this," Nick said. Zoro tried to say something in response, but what could he say? His own words were already being thrown back into his face.

    "...Tsk, fine, whatever. Just be quick about," Zoro grumbled, turning to face the other way like a petulant child.

    "Yeah, yeah, keep your panties on. This won''t take long," Nick said as he walked towards Buchi, staring him right in the eyes. "You hear that, fatty! I''m the one you''re fighting!"

    "Stop calling me fat! It''s all muscle!" Buchi yelled, rather defensively.

    "Just because you painted abs onto your gut, doesn''t mean it''s muscle!" Nick replied in a bored tone. Who did he think he was fooling with those things? He was clearly too fat to have visible abs. Poor guy was probably just in denial.

    "I have a thyroid problem!" Buchi said, trying to deflect. That solidified it in Nick''s mind. He was definitely in denial.

    "No, you have a, can''t put down the fork, problem. You can lie to yourself but you sure as shit can''t lie to me," Nick said in a bored tone. Seems no matter where you go, people just can''t seem to take responsibility for their own actions.

    "Gah! That''s it, you''re dead!" Buchi shouted, charging at Nick. Before doing so, he placed his stolen blades behind him in his belt.

    "Buchi, no! Don''t!" Sham yelled, being able to see the trap for what it was. The foul mouthed brunette was clearly trying to rile his brother up, make him angry enough to make a mistake. And it seems like his tactics worked.

    Buchi swiped at Nick with his left hand, but compared to his brother he was pretty slow. Fast for a normal person, maybe, but nothing Nick couldn''t handle.

    Ducking under the swing, Nick pulled his arm back, delivering a devastating punch right in his painted on abs. Buchi''s blubber rippled like waves from the point of contact, his eyes bulged out, and finally, he went flying into the cabin wall, his lower half being the only thing visible.

    "Buchi!" Sham yelled in concern as he started running towards his downed brother. But Zoro was having none of it, blocking the other man''s path with a savage grin on his face.

    "Get out of my way!" Sham yelled angrily.

    "Why don''t you try and make me?" Zoro suggested. Sham growled in response, eyes narrowing with hatred.

    "Fine! I hope you''re ready to die!"

    "Just try it," Zoro challenged. With another yell, Sham attacked the swordsman, who began parrying his attacks with an eager look on his face. It might actually be good for him to get some practice in using only one sword.

    Nick turned back as he heard the battle commence, watching the fight for a moment. It seems that even with only one sword Zoro would have little trouble with his opponent. Unless he had some tricks up his sleeve that is. But he had his own problem to deal with.

    Turning away from the other two fighting, Nick noticed a slight issue.

    "Where the hell did he go!?" Nick yelled in frustration. Damn it, he looked away for a second! How could someone so big move so quietly? He blamed anime logic, something he was sure he would be doing a lot of.

    Staring at the hole in the wall, it was pretty clear which way he went. Buchi almost certainly fled deeper into the ship, which is just what Nick didn''t want. Oh well, beggars can''t be choosers, so with a sigh of acceptance, he followed the man inside.

    Seeing his comrade disappear into the depths of the ship through his peripherals, Zoro wasn''t sure how he felt trusting the other man to get his swords back. He was tough enough, sure, but it still felt wrong to him.

    The swords may not have been valuable, but they were his. It was his responsibility to care for them. His pride as a swordsman demanded it. Besides, it would be stupid not to care for the tools of his trade.

    Well, nothing he could do about it now. What''s done is done. All that was left for him to do was take out the trash.

    "Better not let me down, Nick," he mumbled to himself, even as he parried another attack by the cat themed pirate. He glared at the other man, resting his sword on his shoulder.

    "You''re one annoying bastard, you know that?"

    "That''s my line," Sham responded, a heated glare of his own aimed at Zoro. He needed to end this fast and go help his brother. This wasn''t part of the plan their Captain came up with, and while he was confident in his own ability to handle things, Kuro hated it when his plans went awry. That''s when he became the most violent. But as long as things worked out in the end, he shouldn''t have too much to worry about.

    It was a simple plan in theory. Make them mad by torturing and putting their victims on public display. According to his Captain, these guys had a bit of a bleeding heart problem, and people with that particular ailment were easy to manipulate.

    Once they were good and mad, the plan was to get them to drop their guard by acting like one of the victims, and take one out with a surprise attack. If that failed, plan B was to steal the swordsman''s swords.

    After all, a swordsman without a sword was pretty much useless, even if he was a musclebound meathead.

    Once the swords were stolen, Buchi would lead him into the ship, but only if they couldn''t get all of them. That way, Zoro would be at a disadvantage, both because he was down a blade or two, but also because he was in an enclosed space and therefore, unable to maneuver his blade properly in such an area.

    Broken down, the plans were as follows:

    Plan A: Enrage them, get them to drop their guard, and kill one of them with a surprise attack then double team the second.

    Plan B: If the surprise attack fails, steal Zoro''s swords, making him unable to defend himself.

    Plan C: If Zoro retains a sword, lure him into the bowels of the ship, where he can''t maneuver his sword properly.

    It was going well so far, and Plan C was a go. At least until the other muscle bound idiot got in the way. Captain Kuro was sure Zoro would never trust anyone to recover his stolen blades, least of all that brown haired simpleton.

    But he did, infuriatingly enough, and that put the plan in jeopardy. Sham had no idea how his Captain knew it would be these two who showed up, and quite frankly, it didn''t matter. His Captain was just scary like that.

    What did matter, however, was them failing. That was not an option, not if they wanted to live. So Sham would just have to ensure there were no more delays to the schedule. Which might be impossible, considering how long it took for them to get here.

    Did they get lost or something? But how was that possible?

    The two opponents stared at each other for several long moments, until a violent gust of wind blew across the deck. That seemed to be some kind of signal, as the two charged at each other.

    They met in a violent clash, sword and claws singing a deadly tune as they danced with each other. Sham jumped into the air, doing a somersault over Zoro, striking out with his claws as he did so.

    The smaller of the two blocked the attack as Sham landed behind him in a crouch, and immediately dashed towards Zoro again, who thrust his sword out to try and skewer the other man.

    Unfortunately, Sham was able to dodge with little effort, and began to rapidly attack in a seemingly random pattern. His strikes had no pattern, his cadence ever shifting to try and throw Zoro off his game.

    But it didn''t work. Zoro blocked or dodged every attack thrown his way. Seeing an opening, he swung his blade horizontally, hoping to cut the man''s head off. But Sham was able to jump backwards just in time, only losing a few strands of hair.

    The pair took a moment to assess the situation. So far, neither had been able to get one over on the other, and Sham was suddenly very glad Zoro only had one sword to play with right now.

    "You''re one squirrelly bastard, you know that?" Zoro asked, feeling a bit frustrated at his lack of success in cutting the other man in two. A feeling mirrored by Sham. He needed something to give himself an edge, but what? Looking around the ship, he spotted something that gave him an idea.

    "Well this squirrel is about to claw your eyes out!" Sham shouted, rushing towards him once more. Zoro held his blade out, ready to defend himself, but to his great confusion, when Sham entered his striking distance, he suddenly shifted directions, heading straight for the mast.

    Why the hell would he be going toward that? It didn''t make any sense. That is, until Zoro remembered just who was tied to the mast.

    "Damn it. Get back here!" he shouted, giving chase. But he wasn''t fast enough. Sham had too great a lead on him. That doesn''t mean he would just give up.

    "Aw, what''s the matter? You''re running awfully slow. Don''t you care what happens to him?" Sham taunted, looking back and giving Zoro a sadistic grin. Perfect, he was falling right into his trap.

    The truth is, he didn''t give two shits about the old man dying on the mast, but Zoro did. Seems like his Captain was right on the money, and the other green haired man would pay the price for his compassion. Once he was close enough, Sham would use the mast as a springboard and pierce right through that bleeding heart of his.

    Sham was almost there, raising a clawed hand to strike down the helpless Pett. Left with no other choice, Zoro used a secret, forbidden technique. One frowned upon by swordsmen the world over.

    He flipped his hold on his sword to a reverse grip. He then came to a stop, pulling his arm back with the sword in it into a throwing position. Though he was reluctant to use such a technique, desperate times called for desperate measures.

    "One Sword Style: Demon''s Javelin!"

    Hearing the shout, Sham turned to see what all the hullabaloo was all about, only to see a sword flying towards his face.

    "What the!" he shouted, ducking the sword in the nick of time, but losing more of his hair in the process. A small trickle of blood fell down his face, dripping onto the ground and intermixing with the blood of his and his brother''s victims.

    "Looks like first blood belongs to me," Zoro said with a cocky smirk.

    "What the hell was that! You almost took my head off!" Sham shouted with indignation.

    "That was the point. This is a battle to the death, remember?" Zoro taunted, throwing Sham''s words back at him.

    The cat pirate grit his teeth in anger. He''d show him. " But now you have no weapon! What can a swordsman do without a sword?"

    "You''re about to find out."

    "I''ve had just about enough of your cocky attitude! It''s time for you to die!" Sham shouted, sprinting toward Zoro once more, who bent his knees in preparation for his next move.

    While it was true he didn''t have a sword anymore, he wasn''t completely bereft of arms. He did have something in his possession he could use as a sword, though it was a pretty blunt one.

    "I''ll see you in hell! Cat Lancer!" shouted Sham, as he thrust one clawed hand forward, all four fingers pointing straight ahead, using his hand like a spear again. With a name and everything this time.

    As Sham''s lance sped towards his head, Zoro smirked and ducked, moving to the left. Sham watched in slow motion as Zoro''s hand went towards his swords. He was confused for a split second, as Zoro didn''t currently have any swords. But what he did have, was the thing used to hold them.

    A scabbard. Sham''s eyes widened at the realization, however, there was nothing he could do about it.

    As Zoro was going past the other man, he drew the saya from its place on his haramaki. It slammed into Shams stomach with the force of a cannonball. His eyes bugged out of his head, his ribs cracked, and he went flying through the air, slamming into the mast he intended to jump off of.

    Blood shot from his mouth at the impact, and he was shocked his back hadn''t snapped in two. He slid off the mast towards the ground, barely managing to stay on his feet as he landed. He coughed up a bit more blood, raising his head to glare at the other man.

    Only for his eyes to widen in shock once more. Zoro was dashing towards him, sheath held in a position suggesting he was about to become a shish kebab. Diving out of the way with a panicked yelp, Sham scrambled away from Zoro as fast as he could.

    Looking back, he could see the result of the swordsman''s attack. The mast was now sporting a large indentation and several cracks ran off in every direction. It was honestly amazing the thing was still intact.

    Sham stood slowly, holding onto his cracked ribs in pain as he glared at the other man. He whipped a bit of blood that dribbled past his lips, as he took in deep, painful breaths of air.

    Having broken ribs really sucked.

    "Tsk, can''t you just hold still? You''re not strong enough to beat me, the least you could do is die with some dignity," Zoro said, as he reached up to his sword and pulled it out of the wood. It was a bit of a struggle as the blade had bit in deeply, but he managed.

    Ignoring Sham, whose eyes looked a little bloodshot from the pure rage rolling off of him, he inspected the blade, checking it for damage. After a few moments, he nodded, satisfied, before giving it a bit of a test swing.

    "Not strong though you say? We''ll see about that¡­" Sham said, as his arms fell limply to his sides and his head slumped forward.

    "What are you going on about now?" Zoro asked with a raised brow.

    "My Captain has a secret technique, you know? One he copied from a Marine a long time ago," Sham said, as he began to sway back and forth.

    "That right? Good for him, but what does that have to do with anything?" Zoro said, bored. Sham''s swaying picked up speed as he moved to a beat only he could seemingly hear.

    "I''m glad you asked. You see, it took me a while, but I managed to copy it as well. Now, face the terror of the Pussyfoot Maneuver!"

    "What kind of name is-" but Zoro''s mockery was interrupted by the shock he felt as Sham seemingly disappeared. "The hell?"

    He looked around but saw no sign of his opponent. That is, until a sharp pain erupted from his chest, blood spurting from it like a fountain.

    "Gah!" Zoro yelled, clutching his now bloody chest in pain. Looking down, he saw his hand covered in nearly as much blood as it was when he grabbed Nick, with four similar cuts going horizontally across his chest.

    "Damn it! What the hell was that?" Zoro growled, trying to find his opponent. But no matter where he looked, he couldn''t seem to find him. He was starting to wonder if he turned himself invisible.

    But what Marine technique could do that?

    What was even more surprising was the claw marks that started appearing all over the ship. From the deck to the cabin walls; hell, even the railing. Nothing was spared. Especially not him.

    He grunted as a sudden pain exploded from his side, his shirt and jacket now covered in even more blood. He could see four new tear marks under his left arm.

    "This is getting old!" he grumbled, sword held up in a defensive stance, for all the good it did him. He needed to figure out how his technique worked before the other guy finished him off.

    "Having some problems are we?" asked a voice from behind him. Turning swiftly, he saw none other than Sham, standing there looking as cocky as he ever has, leaning against the railing.

    "You look confused. Want me to tell you how my technique works? I don''t mind giving you a handicap, Nyahahaha!" Sham offered with an obnoxious laugh.

    "You''ll be the one with a handicap when I cut your damn legs off!" Zoro yelled, charging at the Black Cat. But as he went to bring his sword down on his head, Sham disappeared once more, and Zoro''s blade hit nothing but air.

    "Son of a bitch. Where''d he go now?" Zoro questioned, once more looking around for the man. After seeing him use the technique again, Zoro was at least certain on one thing; he wasn''t turning invisible.

    Eyes shifting to every part of the ship he could, he did notice something off. Footprints. Not the strangest thing to see on a ship, but these ones were red, obviously from someone having stepped in the blood coating the deck.

    Again, not that weird, but what was strange about them was the spacing. They were far too close together. It was like he was taking at least ten steps for every one he would normally take.

    And the name; Pussyfoot Maneuver. It had nothing to do with invisibility or anything. The lightbulb in his head might not have been the brightest, but even he could figure out what was going on.

    "So that''s it¡­" Zoro thought aloud, a frown marring his face. It was pretty obvious when you think about it. He wasn''t turning invisible and he didn''t have some kind of teleportation power, he was just moving too fast to see.

    Some technique¡­ At least the name makes a bit more sense now.

    But even though he knew what the other guy was doing didn''t mean he had a way to counter it. Case and point, a new spray of blood coming from his forearm. He grunted at the new pain, but did little else to show his discomfort.

    "That''s quite the trick you have, but it won''t save you," the swordsman claimed.

    "Oh? So you''ve figured it out? I guess there''s more than meat in your head after all. But knowing won''t save you. By stepping on the ground ten times in a single second, I can move faster than the human eye can see. There''s nothing you can do against my speed! I''m invincible!" Sham yelled, seemingly from everywhere at once.

    "We''ll see about that," Zoro chimed in, unimpressed. Nobody was invincible, especially not some no name scrub from a backwater pirate crew like theirs.

    The swordsman''s attitude was really starting to grate on Sham''s nerves. Even now, he refused to admit he was outclassed. That he, Sham, was superior to him in every way. Well, he knew just how to fix that rotten attitude of his.

    Several more wounds appeared on Zoro, as Sham zipped around the battlefield. No matter how many times the green haired swordsman took a swing, he only ever met air. And while the wounds he received weren''t too deep, if he got too many more of them, he would be in trouble.

    Death by a thousand cuts wasn''t the most pleasant way to go.

    But even if he hadn''t been able to land a hit yet, it was only a matter of time. The longer the fight went on, the more used to the technique he became. The edge of his blade inching ever closer to its target.

    Until finally, he managed a hit. It wasn''t deep, little more than a scratch in the grand scheme of things, but the psychological effects couldn''t be ignored.

    "Gah!" Sham yelled, as he violently rolled across the ground before coming to a stop, a shallow cut across his thigh. He held his stinging appendage in disbelief rather than pain.

    "Y-you actually managed to hit me?" he said in disbelief. It just shouldn''t be possible. He''s seen his Captain decimate an entire battalion of Marines without them ever noticing before, and he was just as good as he was at the technique.

    So how the hell did he manage to hit him!?

    "Like I said, you''re too weak to beat me. So just give up already," Zoro told him, bored eyes boring into him.

    "Like hell I will! I just need to go faster! So fast I''ll cut you in two!" Sham yelled hysterically, eyes manic with anger and desperation. He crouched down, claws digging into the wood of the deck as he took a runners position.

    However, in spite of his apparent madness, Zoro remained calm as a cucumber, holding his sword at the ready.

    "Try it."

    "Ahhhhh!" Sham yelled, as he once more disappeared. Zoro didn''t move, he just stood there, waiting, even as a cut appeared on his leg. Then his shoulder. Then his arm. Sham was having a wonderful time. That cocky bastard couldn''t keep up with him at all.

    Something that Zoro realized as well. Guess he wasn''t all talk after all. That being said, there was more to battle than just using your eyes. Every sense of the human body was used to fight. Hearing, smelling, feeling; hell, even tasting. Everything is utilized in some way.

    Sense he couldn''t use his eyes, he might as well keep them shut. They weren''t doing him any favors at the moment anyway. He instead, centered his focus on his other senses.

    For example, while he couldn''t see Sham, he could hear him. Every step, every breath, right down to the beating of his heart. Nothing escaped Zoro''s ears.

    Smelling was a bit more difficult, with the stench of blood permeating the area. But he could smell his cheap cologne and what he assumed was the cat nip he smoked like it was a joint.

    He could feel every vibration in the air as the other man darted all across the ship, every shift in wind as he passed by. Not to mention the feel of his claws as they tore into him.

    And he could taste iron and salt in his mouth, blood and sweat simmering against his tongue, reminding him of what was at stake. But more than that, he could taste victory.

    Focusing on all these things, he could practically see the path Sham was taking. An image formed in his mind''s eye of the man running, sprinting around the ship, that insufferable smirk on his face every time he cut into him.

    But even with all this information, there was one sense he relied on more than anything. A feeling in his gut, a tingle in the back of his head; that intangible realization of what must be done. Something that everyone had but most ignored.

    Instinct.

    And his instinct told him that Sham would end the battle the way it started. He gripped his sword tightly with both hands. All he had to do now was wait for the right moment to strike.

    Sham was loving this. Seeing Zoro bleeding so much, from every part of his body made his chest swell in joy. But all good things must come to an end. As much as he enjoyed toying with the guy, he was starting to feel the strain of his technique. It was time to finish this.

    And he knew just how to do it too. Zoro had one spot of his body that was completely devoid of that wonderful red color. A place he had been protecting as much as he could, risking all to protect it.

    His back.

    What a lovely target, so big and broad. He couldn''t wait to tear it to shreds. And without that other bastard around, there was no one to stop him this time.

    Increasing his speed even more, he switched directions, aiming straight for his target''s unprotected back. What Sham didn''t know is that this is exactly what Zoro was waiting for.

    He knew Sham wouldn''t be able to resist going for the one spot he''d been stopped from striking at twice now. He purposefully left that spot open, vulnerable; just daring him to attack. And he took the bait.

    Feeling the wind shift, Zoro knew it was time. Sham was charging straight for him, like a bull charging a red flag. Didn''t he know red flags were meant to be avoided? And Zoro was looking pretty red with all that blood on him.

    Sham''s eyes lit up with glee as he thrust his hand out one final time, preparing to skewer the swordsman once more. "Take this! The Pussyfoot Maneuver''s true terror! Out of the Back Attack!"

    Zoro''s eyes snapped open as he heard Sham''s footsteps behind him. The cat weirdo was right, it was time to end this. But it wouldn''t be Zoro who met his end this day.

    Ducking the hand attempting to spear him, Zoro twisted his body as he swung his single sword. Sham once more saw the world slow down, watching the blade inch its way closer to him for what seemed like hours. With how fast he was going, there was no way for him to evade the blow aimed at his waist.

    Feeling the blade touch him, time sped up once more, as Sham stopped several yards away from his opponent. Zoro knelt there on one knee, facing the opposite direction of Sham.

    The Black Cat Pirate stared off into the distance, admiring the view of the moon''s reflection coming off of the ocean. It would be the last thing he ever saw.

    "You¡­ Bastard¡­" he ground out, before vomiting up a pint of blood. His body stood there for a few seconds as the light drained from his eyes. And as a large wave crashed against the ship, his body split into two pieces, hitting the ground with a wet splat.

    Zoro stood up, swinging his sword to remove the blood from it, before returning it to its sheath. He turned to look at his now dead opponent one last time, eyes holding no remorse in them. "Looks like you''re the one who was cut in two. Should have listened."

    Battle for Syrup Village!

    Zoro vs Sham

    Winner: Zoro!

 Chapter 26

    Nick was not having the best of times at the moment. Sure, wandering through a dark ship in the middle of the night, searching for a psychotic killer wasn''t as bad as being tortured, but it wasn''t his idea of a particularly good time either.

    Not to mention the blood dripping down his back. At first, it felt like he shit himself. You know, when the blood ran down the crack of his ass all warm and wet and sticky. But now it was just cold and uncomfortable. At least the bleeding has mostly stopped, but still, the residue remained.

    And to think, this is the second time he''s broken into a ship in the dead of night. But this time, there was no Nami to hold his hand. Disappointing, but at least there isn''t a creepy clown fetish room in this one.

    At least, he hoped not. That was not a trauma that needed repeating.

    Tiptoeing along the creaky floors through a dim and dark hallway, Nick tried to spot anything that could lead him in the direction of the missing Buchi. Unfortunately, he was currently unable to see all that much, because he didn''t have any source of light besides whatever drips of moonlight came through the windows in the adjourning rooms or from the entrance behind him.

    Man he wished he had a flashlight right about now. Or a Nami. A Nami would be good. One who carried lanterns somewhere on her person, a place Nick suspected but could not confirm. Her boobs, if you were wondering. It was the only place big enough to hide something like that.

    All that was missing from this scenario was flashes of lightning briefly lighting up the room he was in, allowing the audience to see the person he was looking for was right behind him.

    Turning around as fast as he could, Nick was both relieved and disappointed to see no one there. That''s one horror trope to cross off the list. For now at least. But there was certain to be more, and the only way to defeat a trope, is with another trope.

    Nick knew just the one. And it even required his potent vocals!

    "One¡­ two¡­ Nicky''s coming for yo-ah! Mother fucker!" Nick yelled in shock and pain, hopping around on one foot while holding the other, his toes throbbing in pain. As he flipped around to keep walking down the hallway, he just so managed to stub his toe on something.

    "Damn that hurt! What the hell did I kick?" he asked aloud. Whatever it was, was noisy as hell. Looking down with an angry growl, he immediately spotted the culprit, his anger giving him the power to see in the dark. Not really, but he felt like it did.

    Squatting down to get a better look at the object, he was only mildly surprised to see a metal tool box, with its contents sprayed across the ground. "That explains the noise," he mumbled, picking up a fairly large screwdriver.

    But not why it was there. Did Pett leave it out? The jerk. If the old guy survived he would get a mild scolding about putting tools away. It was just dangerous!

    "Ah, what''s wrong? Having trouble seeing in the dark?" asked a voice from everywhere and nowhere at the same time.

    "Bitchy? Is that you?" Nick asked standing up, holding the screwdriver up like it was one of the swords he needed to get back. He tried looking around the darkened hall to spot the voice. But everywhere he looked was empty.

    "My name''s not Bitchy!" he shouted back, and Nick could practically feel the spittle hitting his face from the other man''s rage. Made him very grateful that he hadn''t actually found him yet.

    "No, I''m pretty sure that''s your name," Nick called out again, hoping to figure out just where in the hell he was hiding. A task that was proving difficult, as it didn''t seem like Buchi was willing to reveal his location that easily. He was dumb, just not as dumb as Nick would have liked.

    But that just means he would have to make him even angrier. Enough to make a mistake.

    "I think I know my own name!" Buchi shouted back.

    "Really? You think you know? Does that mean you aren''t sure?" Nick called back, and he could damn near feel the hall vibrating from the growl he got in response. Perfect, just a little bit more and this little ventriloquist act would be finished.

    "I''m sure I''m going to kill you!" Buchi shouted back, and this time Nick could tell he was somewhat close. Not sure how close, but he wasn''t as far as he thought.

    "No you''re not," Nick said back in a sing-song voice, grating on Buchi''s nerves.

    "Yes I am!" Buchi shouted back.

    "No you''re not."

    "Yes I am!"

    "No you''re not."

    "Yes I am!"

    "Yes you are."

    "No I''m not!"

    Nick stood there, in the dark, with a shit eating grin on his face. He wasn''t sure Buchi understood the classic bit of wordplay fuckery, but it was only a matter of time until he realized he''d been tricked.

    "Wait! I didn''t mean-what I meant-gah! Damn you!"

    "Come now, don''t be so upset. It''s good you realize you won''t be able to kill me. You''re much too fat," Nick responded glibly to the pirate''s fury. Normally his bullshit spewing mouth got him into trouble, but maybe this time it would get him out of it.

    "I told you it''s muscle!" Buchi denied once more. But his denial was the final straw. Nick now knew exactly where he was. That being said, where he was didn''t make much sense.

    "...How the fuck did you get up there?" Nick asked in disbelief, staring at Buchi who was hiding above him, arms and legs doing the splits to hold himself up by pressing firmly against the walls on both sides of the hall.

    Most of his body could barely be seen in the poorly lit hall, but what was visible was his eyes. They glowed with a cat''s incandescence. Nick was starting to wonder if one of his parents was an actual cat.

    "I climbed," Buchi stated simply.

    "Oh, I see," Nick responded. The two stared at each other for a moment, before Buchi let out a loud yell, dropping from his uncomfortable looking perch and descending straight for Nick.

    "Oh shit!" Nick yelped as he dove out of the way, Buchi landing with a thunderous bang. Nick was certain he felt the whole ship shake from the impact. If he wasn''t already crouching on the floor, he was pretty sure he would have landed on his ass.

    Or been squished by Buchi''s prodigious girth. Now that he thought about it, that would have been the perfect time to execute another Shoryuken. Buchi was big, but he wasn''t as big as a grizzly bear, so he was sure it would have worked this time.

    Oh well, he was sure there would be another opportunity. Right now he had bigger things to worry about over a missed opportunity to perform a classic piece of video game history.

    No matter how much it stuck in his craw.

    Nick watched as Buchi stood from his crouch, pointing his screwdriver at him threateningly. Did he feel silly doing it? A bit. But you never know when something could turn out to be useful.

    "And what do you plan to do with that?" Buchi asked, glaring holes into Nick. Said brown haired man looked down at the large screwdriver in his hand, as if contemplating the question, before raising his head and giving Buchi a cocky smirk, "Why don''t you come over here and find out."

    "How about I take it from you and use it to screw you to death!" Buchi shouted, proud of himself for saying what he thought was a clever one liner. But Nick was not nearly as impressed as the other man thought he would be.

    "First your brother and now you? Listen, it''s not that I''m not flattered, because I''m not, but I''m just not into you that way. So I think it''s for the best if we just stayed enemies," Nick said, in as comforting and sarcastic a manner he could.

    "...I hope you''ve said your prayers, because it''s time for you to meet your maker," Buchi ground out through grit teeth, one eye twitching in irritation. He was more than a little peeved at the brown haired jackass in front of him, and not just because he dodged his attack.

    His big mouth was a much bigger part of the equation. He seemed incapable of taking anything seriously.

    "For both our sakes, I hope not," Nick said with a shiver. He wasn''t thinking about any god or their angry retribution for his less than stellar faith. No, he was far more afraid of his other maker. Namely, his dad.

    If he was here, seeing how beat up Nick had been getting since coming here¡­ yeah, that wouldn''t be pretty. Especially if he got whatever power boost going to an anime world gives you.

    As for the other half responsible for his creation, his mother, Nick had no idea who she was. His father never spoke about her and there were no pictures of her in the house. Nick suspected he was adopted but his dad claimed he came from his loins.

    But if she fell for a guy like his old man, she was either a lunatic or a mafia boss. There were no other explanations. Hell, it was probably both. That would explain some of Nick''s personality traits.

    He was distracted from his thoughts by Buchi suddenly charging at him, screaming, "Don''t ignore me!" Shit, was he talking or something? Because Nick was in his own little world. Guess he took offense to that. Talk about a needy personality. He might as well have yelled out, "Notice me Senpai!"

    It was just plain creepy.

    However needy the man might have been, or how large, he was fast. Add in the lack of light in the hall made avoiding his attacks more difficult than it needed to be. But Nick was able to keep ahead of them, if only just barely. Right now he was floating like a butterfly.

    Until it was time to sting like a bee.

    Dodging to the left of one of Buchi''s pointy fingers, Nick threw a heavy right cross directly into the spot he punched earlier. The punch wasn''t nearly as strong, but it was enough to stagger the bigger man.

    "Urk!" Buchi let out, as he took a few shaky steps backwards. He glared even harder at the other man, if that was possible. But his fury was truly ignited when Nick gave him a ''come here'' gesture with his hand.

    Letting out a roar he charged at Nick once more, his attacks going even faster than last time, his fury lending to his strength. This did, however, come with a dowside. While it''s true his attacks were even faster than before, they were also more predictable, meaning they weren''t any harder to dodge. Not really.

    Eventually, Nick was able to grab both of his wrists, holding him firmly in his grasp. "That all you got?" he asked with a cocky smirk. Buchi looked ready to remove Nick''s entrails and wear them as a scarf, but a sudden memory flashed through his head. A certain swordsman said something earlier, and it gave the cat themed pirate an idea.

    "How about this!" he yelled, taking in a deep breath before releasing it in Nick''s face. The worst part was, Nick had just opened his mouth to run it again.

    "Oh god you do eat ass! Ugh, it''s in my mouth! I think I''m going to be sick!" Nick yelled out in disgust, staggering away from Buchi while trying not to gag. Unfortunately, Nick wasn''t paying attention to his surroundings, and didn''t notice the flight of stairs right behind him.

    Stairs leading down.

    His right foot hit the ledge, and Nick had just enough time to give Buchi a surprised look before he went tumbling down the stairs.

    "Ow! Fuck! Damn it! Son of a-!" These were just some of the curses Nick let out before he hit the bottom of the stairs. He could do nothing but lay there, as still as he could, wheezing in pain. The impact from the fall had driven the air from his lungs.

    "Fuuuuck, my back. No one ever told me falling down stairs hurt so damn much," Nick thought to himself. Or maybe it was because he landed on his wounds. He was pretty sure he could feel some more blood on his back, so his injury from the other cat bastard must have opened up.

    Isn''t that just great?

    "Don''t tell me you''re dead already! But we''ve only just started to play!" shouted Buchi, having sauntered his way to the edge of the stair, peering down into the dark abyss with glee shimmering in his eyes.

    "Screw¡­ You¡­" Nick croaked out. Hearing his voice brought a sadistic smile to Buchi''s face. "Oh good, you''re alive! That means we can continue to make art together!"

    Nick wanted to say something witty but his brain was busy processing the torture his back was in. "I must have tweaked it when I fell. Isn''t that just great?" he thought to himself sarcastically.

    But his ears twitched as they caught a noise. It was barely within hearing range, but here, within the darkness, he had little else to do but listen. Because he couldn''t see shit. The second floor of the ship had zero light. Not even a glimmer from a window.

    That would make fighting that sadistic cat even harder. But what else could he do? Go back to Zoro like a sniveling little bitch? "Zoro, I''m sorry I couldn''t get your swords back, but it was just so dark and scary! Please forgive me!"

    No, fuck that! Nick wouldn''t put himself through that humiliation. If Batman could beat up assholes in the dark, so could he. So what if Batman was trained as an assassin, had millions of dollars worth of gadgets, and was a certifiable genius. Nick had something Bruce didn''t have.

    The fervent desire to avoid seeing Zoro''s smug ass face if he didn''t come back with his swords. Worse if he ran to him for help. And that was better than any amount of training, money, or intelligence.

    And no, he wasn''t coping.

    As Nick forced his way to his hands and knees, his ears picked up that sound again. It was a creaking sound, like someone walking along an old wooden floor. Exactly the sound he made while walking through this ship.

    And it was getting closer. Nick''s eyes widened with realization, and rolled out of the way, just as an overweight cosplayer landed right where he was, claws extended into the floor. If he hadn''t gotten out of the way in time, he would have a few new piercings to disinfect.

    And no shady mall employee to blame. Just a freak in a cat costume. He really hoped his next opponent was not dressed like a furry weirdo. Once is an accident, twice is a coincidence, but three times is a pattern, and Nick would like to avoid this becoming the norm.

    "Aw, why did you get out of the way? You would have made such lovely screams if only you''d stay still," Buchi whined, eyes turning to look at the pained form of Nick struggling to pick himself up off the ground.

    "Sorry pal, the only ones who get to hear my screams are the ladies, and though you have some pretty big tits, you''re just not my type. So please stop hitting on me," Nick snarked through grit teeth as he reached a standing position, one hand on the wall for support.

    "...I''m going to enjoy using you as a scratching post," Buchi said, eyes filled with rage as he stalked toward his next victim. Luckily Nick was able to hear him even if he couldn''t really see him. He mostly looked like a slightly darker mass of dark.

    The mass of black shifted and a loud creak groaned out. Nick ducked out of reflex, and a good thing two. A meaty clawed hand passed through where his head just was, digging into the wall.

    Taking a chance, Nick threw a left hook into the center of the mass. He would have preferred aiming for a vital spot, such as the liver, but he couldn''t make out just where that would be, so instead he settled for just smacking the bitch as hard as he could.

    But with the pain in his back, he wasn''t able to generate as much force as he wanted. It was better than nothing, but a far cry from his best.

    Nick was rewarded for his effort with a grunt of pain, before releasing one of his own. Buchi didn''t just stand there and take it, sending a surprise backhand Nick''s way, connecting with his jaw, the surprise of the blow sending him back to the floor.

    Grabbing his jaw in pain, Nick began to move it back and forth, making sure it wasn''t broken. To his relief, it felt relatively fine. Throbbing, but otherwise intact. Man that cat can hit hard when he wants to.

    Looking up, he saw the shadowy figure shift its weight and knew another attack was coming. He needed to distract the lump before he could do so, the question is how? Seeing the small amount of light wafting down the staircase from the floor above gave Nick an idea.

    He would just have to use the oldest trick in the book. Hopefully, Buchi was dumb enough to fall for it. He certainly looked like he was. Time to find out.

    "Hey Zoro!" Nick shouted in joy, putting his considerable acting skills to work. The ones that made him a tree in his middle school play, because hearing him perform made the teacher''s ears bleed. He was just unappreciated in his time, that''s all.

    Regardless of how great an actor Nick thought he was, it was good enough to fool Buchi. "Impossible! He can''t be here!" Buchi shouted in alarm, and Nick saw his penumbral form shift, meaning he must be looking behind him now.

    Perfect, that gave him the chance to use a forbidden technique, frowned upon in the boxing world. Except for matches in the underground, of course, where it was applauded.

    Jumping to his feet and ignoring the spike of agony in his back, he searched for what looked like Buchi''s head. He had a good idea where it was, but he was far from certain. His next attack would involve some amount of luck then.

    Knowing time was of the essence, Nick leapt towards his opponent. As stupid as he was, even he would realize there was no green haired swordsman behind him, and that he''d been tricked. So before that happens, Nick unleashed a devastating blow to the back of his head.

    "Jackrabbit''s Fist!" Nick shouted, as he bashed Buchi''s skull in. The larger man''s eye bulged outward as he was sent flying forward, bouncing along the floor before landing still.

    As Nick was coming back to the ground, his foot landed on something, sending his tumbling to the floor as well. "Oof! Damn it, what did I trip on this time?" he grouched, hands bumbling around in the dark until he discovered the cause of his misfortune.

    The screwdriver. Because of course it was. Nick let out an irritated huff before he turned to look at Buchi, laying there unmoving. He slowly stood up before making his way to the other man, admiring his handiwork.

    The Jackrabbit''s Fist was a stronger variation of the rabbit punch, an illegal move in most civilized sports. It was nothing more than a blow to the back of the head, named for the way you would kill a rabbit without damaging the fur.

    The reason it was illegal in most sports is because of the possible injuries it could cause to the spinal column. There were some cases of it actually killing someone as well. Normally, a rabbit punch was rather quick, but his technique put his whole body into it.

    It was meant as a killing technique. Something his dad came up with for street fights. Nick had only ever been forced to use it once before now, and it ended up with the other guy dying. It was ruled self defense, but Nick had always been wary of using it since.

    But Buchi? He deserved whatever he got.

    Nick stared down at his hand, shaking it to try and remove the pain. "Damn you have a hard head," he complained. It wasn''t enough that his back and jaw hurt, but now his fist did as well? Life wasn''t fair sometimes.

    Well, no use griping about it, at least not without an audience to annoy. Time to finish the task he came here to do. "I''ll just take those¡­" Nick said, pocketing the screwdriver before kneeling down to remove the stolen blades from the back of Buchi''s pants.

    Which was more than a bit uncomfortable, considering he couldn''t see all that well, meaning he might have accidentally copped a feel or two. Not that he wanted to, least of all with an unconscious, obese man, but the swords were in his belt right by his fat ass.

    He was practically inviting him to play a game of grab ass! But why was it all lumpy? Dude should probably see a doctor¡­

    Having accomplished his mission, Nick stood up, ready to depart, heading towards the only bit of light he could see, that being from the stairs. But of course, nothing is allowed to be simple.

    Just as he passed the knocked out form of Buchi, something gripped his leg, causing his face to meet the floor, the impact causing him to lose his grip on one of the swords. "Ah, fuck! What the hell?" Nick moaned, holding onto his now bloody nose.

    Looking back, trying to see what had grabbed him through the gloom, he could barely make out the form of Buchi, who was apparently not as unconscious as he thought. "Damn it! What''s your problem asshole!? Just take the L already!" Nick yelled in frustration.

    But he was ignored entirely, and felt himself being dragged toward Buchi. "Hey! What the hell do you think your-ah, fuck!" he yelled again, this time because of the stabbing pain in his calf.Support the creativity of authors by visiting the original site for this novel and more.

    A pain caused by Buchi deciding it was fair game to take a bite out of Nick. Staring at him in shock, Nick couldn''t believe he would stoop so low. Though in retrospect, it shouldn''t have surprised him at all. Dude was dressed as a cat after all, and cats bite.

    "Let go of me you dirty bitch! I don''t know where your mouth has been!" Nick yelled, as he began to kick Buchi in the face with his other leg. Once, twice, three times his foot bounced off the other man''s fat head, but it did little to deter him from his continued gnawing on Nick''s shinbone.

    "What''s your problem, huh? Just let go already! What are you, a damn zombie!?" Nick shouted, giving him another kick to the face. Because that would be how this day went, with Nick starting the zombie apocalypse by punching some cat obsessed weirdo in the back of the head.

    Honestly, if it was that easy, the Umbrella Corporation tried way too hard. Plants and viruses and parasites¡­ none of that mattered! Just punch a dude, and bam! Zombie!

    But wait¡­ if he really was a zombie, and he just took a bite out of Nick¡­ then that means¡­ Nick was about to become a zombie!

    Oh the inhumanity! He couldn''t become a member of the undead, not until after he seduced a certain ginger haired girl! He wanted to eat her, but not in that way!

    But in all seriousness, his leg fucking hurt. It was like getting stabbed all over again, which made sense considering those massive canines Buchi shoved into his face. Nick was convinced they were fake, but that didn''t matter much when they were going through your leg.

    Real or not, they hurt!

    "Alright, that''s it! No more Mr. Nice Guy!" Nick proclaimed, preparing to draw one of Zoro''s blades from the confines of its sheath. If kicks didn''t work, then maybe a good stabbing would. He hoped the angry green haired man wouldn''t mind.

    Now he just needed to make sure he got him in the head, because everyone knows a zombie''s weakness is the head. Nick''s weakness was his other head, but that''s not important right now.

    However, it seemed like Buchi recognized the danger he was in, because he immediately released Nick from his entrapment. But the brown haired boxer didn''t have time to feel relieved, as Buchi immediately lept for him.

    "Woah!" Nick grunted, bringing the still sheathed blade up in time. He used it to block the Black Cat Pirate from taking a chunk out of his throat this time by shoving it in his mouth. "You''ve got to be kidding me¡­" Nick ground out, struggling to keep the fat man at bay as he slobbered and bit down on the sheath, trying to get to Nick.

    Who didn''t understand this change in behavior. He couldn''t really be a zombie, could he? He was acting like one, but that should be impossible, right?

    Nick winced as a drool from the slobbering madman landed on his face. "Ugh, gross¡­" he complained. But the drool was only part of the problem, as he could smell the other man''s breath more clearly than ever. It was making it harder and harder to resist the force Buchi exerted as he pushed down on the blade.

    As he did so, Nick was able to finally understand what was going on. It wasn''t that Buchi was a zombie, it was more like he became a rabid animal. "You''re not actually conscious right now, are you?" Nick asked, as he stared into the whites of Buchi''s eyes.

    Eyes that held no conscious will to them. It was clear that Buchi was running on pure instinct at this point, and that might have made him even more dangerous. What little mind Buchi may have possessed gave way to an animalistic savagery.

    Damn¡­ looks like his earlier attack backfired something fierce. Instead of killing him or just knocking him out, it released his inner beast. Wasn''t that just perfect? Well, there was only one thing to do with a rabid animal¡­

    Put it down.

    "You want to bite me that bad huh? Well two can play at that game," Nick said, giving his own savage smirk before opening his mouth and chomping down on Buchi''s nose. He may not have had the sharp teeth of his enemy, but it was more than enough to cause a significant amount of pain to him.

    Luckily for Buchi, with Nick''s jaw in pain from getting backhanded earlier, he wasn''t able to bite off his nose. But that didn''t matter. The damage was enough to force Buchi to cease his attempts at Nick''s throat.

    Letting out a howl of pain, Buchi swung his head back while standing up, trying to get away from whatever was causing his torment. Relief washed over Nick as the mad cat stepped away from him. His breathing was erratic as he tried to catch his breath.

    "That was too close¡­" Nick thought. Fighting someone without the capacity to think wasn''t as easy as you might believe. It was almost impossible to predict what they would do. But it did provide opportunities.

    A person with intelligence and any fighting experience at all should know what a bad idea it is to turn your back on an opponent. A beast might not think about it. Case and point, the rabid Buchi facing away from him, holding his nose in pain.

    Nick couldn''t see that''s what he was doing, not really, but he somehow knew all the same. This was a chance he couldn''t pass up. Standing up, and nearly falling over due to his bum leg, he limped towards Buchi with a determined gait.

    Taking Zoro''s sword in hand, Nick jumped up using his good leg, and wrapped the sheathed blade around Buchi''s neck, trying to strangle him. The man let out a surprised yelp, and immediately began thrashing around. But Nick was not so easily deterred, and kept his grip firm.

    Gagging, choking sounds could be heard echoing through the empty ship as Buchi tried to remove the object from his throat. His hands went to the sword, but no matter how hard he tried, he was unable to loosen his opponent''s grip.

    "Just die already!" Nick yelled, sweat dripping down his brow at the effort used to keep choking the life out of the cat pirate. But Buchi wasn''t keen on staying still as he flailed about, trying to remove Nick from his back.

    During this flailing, Buchi managed to ram Nick into the wall of the ship, making him gasp in pain. His back was already two kinds of fucked up, he didn''t need a third. But his pained squawk seemed to encourage the rampaging beast, as he began to slam him against the wall repeatedly.

    "Gah! Will you cut that out already!" Nick demanded, as his back flared in agony. He should have been careful what he wished for, because you just might get it.

    Seeing that his tactic wasn''t working, Buchi began to bash the back of his head into Nick''s face, over and over again. It was so much worse than his back getting rammed into a wall.

    After several of these bashes, Nick''s grip finally relented. His own consciousness fading in and out as he started to slide down the wall. But good old mad Buchi wasn''t willing to let bygones be bygones.

    Oh no, far from it in fact. He was pissed beyond reason. Not that he had any reason left at this point, but whatever miniscule amount he still possessed was gone. He turned around and smashed his hand against Nick''s face, holding him in place against the wall.

    That stunt brought Nick back to full consciousness as he grabbed the offending arm and tried to remove it. He also tried calling Buchi''s mother a slew of words that shouldn''t be repeated in polite company. Or any company really. But with Buchi''s hand on his face, all it sounded like was¡­

    "Grf, gufm amgr revug nama sha gaba wa urg," and other assorted nonsense. Even if he didn''t know what he was saying, Buchi could gather it wasn''t anything pleasant, and that seemed to make him even angrier. It shouldn''t have been possible, but what can you do?

    Wanting to silence the yappy, flailing man in his grip, Buchi surged forth and bit into Nick''s shoulder, causing blood to squirt out in every direction. Nick screamed in pain again, and his hands went from Buchi''s arm to his face, trying to pry the lunatic off of him.

    But he didn''t have the leverage, and the fat feline''s canines made it impossible to pull him off. Buchi bit down even harder, relishing the new screams his opponent was making.

    Nick knew he had to get the crazed cat off of him, but no matter what he tried he couldn''t get his disgusting mouth off of him. This was not the kind of hickey he wanted! But there had to be something he could do! He needed to think of something, and fast. Not only was he losing a good deal of blood, but the hand on his face made it impossible to breathe.

    Looking down at the psycho biting him, Nick was reminded of his eyes. Pure white, without a shred of awareness. Just a beast of pure instinct. But thinking of those eyes gave him an idea.

    He jammed his thumb into Buchi''s eye as hard as he could, ripping the sensory organ from the man''s skull, the feeling of doing so made him feel squeamish. It was just so¡­ squishy. Or maybe that was the lack of blood. Either way, the newest bout of pain forced Buchi to shriek and pull back, letting Nick fall to the floor on wobbly feet, taking deep breaths of precious oxygen.

    "Damn it that hurt! Why didn''t I just stab the bitch from behind? I had a sword for christ''s sake! The hell is wrong with me?" Nick chastised himself. He could say it had something to do with honor, a fair fight, or blah blah blah; but that would be a bold face lie. The truth is, he just didn''t think of it at the time.

    Hard to imagine that not even a minute before that he planned to stab Buchi in the face. Weird how that concept just flew out of his mind.

    But now was not the time for self reflection. It was time for some revenge. Hobbling toward the now one eyed cat, Nick called out to him, "Hey, Bitchy!"

    Buchi turned toward the sound of the shout, face set in the definition of rage as he growled at Nick. But he was unperturbed by the implied threat, feeling pretty dang angry himself.

    Seeing his opponent walking towards him, Buchi released a swipe of his claws, but Nick was able to duck underneath it. He couldn''t see that attack, not really, but something told him to dodge, so he did so.

    He then tossed Buchi''s eye into his face, making the large, angry feline flinch back. Because who wouldn''t flinch when someone throws an eyeball at your face? Especially when it as your own

    Knowing his opponent was distracted, Nick twisted his body and pulled his arm back, bending his legs as he prepared to unleash his own attack. This one he was certain would finish the fight. "Time to end this! Rising Dragon!"

    After shouting his attack name like the weeb he is, Nick let loose a devastating uppercut, the sound of his fist hitting Buchi''s jaw sounding like the roar of a dragon. The large man''s fake canines shattered, along with most of his other teeth, flying out of his mouth as he soared into the air. He hit the ground with a dull thud before lying still.

    Nick stood there, panting. "Finally¡­ it''s over¡­"

    The fight was far longer and more arduous than he thought, but he won. Put that big fucker in his place and got vengeance for the people he killed. Now all that was left was to gather the swords and get the hell out of here.

    Actually, there was one thing he had left to do. Looking at the unconscious form of Buchi, Nick couldn''t take the chance of him going around, hurting more innocent people. It was best to make sure he was put down for good.

    And here, in the dark, seemed like the perfect place to do so.

    This time, he remembered the stabbing ability of a sword. He made his way over to where he assumed they were. It might take a bit of time to find in the dark, but he would manage.

    But of course, things were never so simple. As he walked past Buchi, he was once again, grabbed by a hand, face planting into the floor.

    "Gah! Again! Bitchy, you''re really overstaying your welcome!" Nick yelled, looking back at the now fully conscious Black Cat Pirate. How was he still going? Did his punch knock the consciousness back into him? How was that even possible?

    "We''re not¡­ done here¡­" Buchi wheezed out, his words slurred due to his likely broken jaw and shattered teeth. He wasn''t sure what had happened. The last thing he remembered was turning around and looking for Zoro, then there was a massive pain in the back of his skull, and after that¡­ nothing.

    But he ached. Oh how he hurt. His nose was throbbing, his head was pounding, his jaw was aching; but worst of all was his eye. The pain centered there felt like he had been stabbed by a knife and then someone poured lemon juice into the wound. But not only did it feel agonizing, he also couldn''t see out of it!

    "What did you do to me!?" Buchi yelled with a terrified anger. Nick was confused. Did he not remember what happened?

    "Me? You''re the one who started this fight. You did this to yourself," Nick responded, giving him his best condescending smirk. It must have worked, because Buchi let out another angry bellow.

    "That''s it! I''m sick of you! I''m going to kill you! Then I''m going to kill that swordsman! Then I''ll kill every single person on this island! Do you hear me!"

    Nick wasn''t sure what to say in response to the madness Buchi was displaying. He could try to de-escalate things, but he doubted that would work anyway. So he reacted to the tried and true method of being a smartass.

    "I''m sorry. Did you say something?"

    Good old Kakashi. Never a more sure fire way to annoy somebody than to emulate him. One of the only reasons he bothered to watch Naruto, because the main character was just the worst.

    Learn a Jutsu you asshole!

    "Ragh!" Buchi shouted in unbelievable rage. Seriously, Nick couldn''t believe he was this angry. After all, Nick was the one who had to deal with him. If anything, he should be the one who''s the most angry.

    Buch stood up, bringing Nick with him, leaving his head pressing against the floor at an awkward angle. "Hey, the hell do you think your-" But Nick''s tirade was cut short as Buchi swung him through the air.

    "Oh shit!" Nick yelped as he was sent careening towards the wall. There was nothing he could do but brace himself as he slammed against the wall, going straight through it. He rolled across the ground before finally coming to a stop when he hit the outside wall.

    "Why is alway the back?" Nick groaned out, pain flaring up through his body at every little move he made. He coughed violently as dust tickled his throat, causing even more pain to shoot through his body.

    He forced himself to a sitting position, leaning back against the wall he just slammed into. He tried to see where he just came from, but the area was even darker than the hall. You''d think a room would have a window, but nooo, that would be too much to ask for.

    Unfortunately, Nick didn''t have time to sit around and bitch. A tingling shot up his spine and every instinct he had screamed at him to move. So that''s what he did, rolling to the left. He could feel a slight stinging in his cheek as a small scratch revealed itself, dripping blood. A loud crash from his previous spot alerted him to the danger.

    And of course that danger was Buchi. The large man pulled his arm out of the wall, a small stream of moonlight illuminating his battered form. He turned, slowly and deliberately, to level a hate filled glare at Nick.

    Something that Nick was actually able to see thanks to the hole in that wall. And that gave him an idea.

    "Now Bitchy, the ship is not your eating disorder," Nick mocked, only to receive a growl in response. He really wasn''t that much different from his feral state. Nick wasn''t sure if that was a good thing or not.

    Buchi tried to claw Nick''s face again, only for Nick to stumble out of the way, but only just barely. With his leg the way it was, it made dodging harder than he thought. Maybe pissing off the cat wasn''t the best idea?

    ¡­Nah!

    Thankfully, Buchi wasn''t in much better shape, his whole body screaming at him. And with his depth perception thrown off from his missing eye, Nick was able to stay ahead of his attacks by the thinnest of margins.

    Or at least most of them. Grunting in pain as a fresh wound appeared on his chest, Nick gave an angry glare at his opponent. It wasn''t super deep, but it still stung like a bitch.

    "I''m getting real sick of those claws," he grumbled, holding his chest.

    "Well I''m pretty darn sick of your mouth!" Buchi responded, making Nick roll his eyes. It wasn''t his fault he was such a smartass, it was society''s. People just made it too easy to mock them.

    The two of them continued their deadly dance, each one landing a few hits here and there, but no one able to land a decisive blow. But much to Buchi''s growing frustration, Nick was able to escape his well deserved death with an ever growing efficiency.

    "Why!? Why can''t I hit you!?" Buchi yelled in frustration as Nick avoided another of his attacks. Nick gave him an I know something you don''t know look. It drove the cat mad.

    "You''re not very observant, are you?" Nick asked.

    "Huh?" Buchi responded. Observant? What was there to observe? They were in a dimly lit room with nothing inside of it. What could he possibly-

    That''s when it hit him. The room was dimly lit. Before it was completely dark. Looking around in panic, Buchi finally noticed all the holes in the wall, each one letting in just a bit more light than before.

    His eyes widened at the realization of what happened. While they were fighting, Nick kept close to the wall, so when one of them missed, it would create a new opening. Thinking back on it even more, it seemed like Nick missed on purpose several times, just to strike at the wall.

    So that''s why Nick was able to dodge all of his attacks. He could see Buchi now! He made his own window! No longer did the cat themed pirate have the advantage due to the dark. Actually, it was even worse because he was missing an eye.

    Giving the darkly grinning man a fearful look, Buchi took a step back, as sweat began to drip down his back. Nick''s grin grew even wider at seeing the fear in his opponent''s eyes.

    "What''s wrong Bitchy? Scared?" he taunted.

    "Of you? Not a chance!" Buchi returned, rushing toward Nick again. He swung his claw at his throat once more, hoping to get lucky and rip it out. But alas, it was not to be, as Nick ducked under it, and delivered a brutal punch to his stomach.

    "Hurk!" Buchi yelled, trying to hold in his lunch. But Nick wasn''t about to let up. Now that he had the advantage, it was time to press it. He began to rain blow after blow against Buchi''s increasingly fragile person. He kept at it, pummeling Buchi black and blue, till the other man was barely standing.

    Buchi, fearing for his life more than he ever has before, pulled out a desperate move. Seeing Nick''s left hand coming towards his face, Buchi opened his mouth and bit down.

    "Ah, not the fucking teeth again!" Nick yelled. Even though most of his teeth were in pieces, and those two large canines were lying somewhere on the floor of the ship, they still hurt. Each one sharp and pointy, like dozens of little needles piercing his flesh.

    With his hand in Buchi''s mouth, the larger man grabbed Nick by the throat, twisted his body, and slammed him against the wall. The one with all his precious holes in it. But he wasn''t done there, far from it. He thrust his left hand out, all four claws penetrating into Nick''s stomach.

    "Guh!" Nick yelled, throwing up a bit of blood as he did so. Fuck that hurt, and Buchi wasn''t letting up on the pressure at all, using it to keep him pinned to the wall. He tried grabbing onto the hand, tried to pull it out, but just like the last time he was forced against the wall by the other man, he wasn''t able to overcome his strength.

    "Damn it¡­ You bastard," Nick muttered, staring daggers into Buchi''s one eye.

    "Aw, what''s wrong? Does it hurt? You''re not afraid are you?" Buchi asked, twisting and grinding his fist deeper into Nick''s stomach, who could only barely hold back a scream. Why did every pirate he meets want to torture him?

    "Well don''t you worry, because it will all be over soon," Buchi assured, only to receive a glob of blood and spit in his face for his troubles. Growling in anger, he headbutted Nick in the face, whose limbs fell limply to his side.

    Seeing the dazed look in his opponent''s eyes, Buchi felt assured of his victory, even as Nick glared through the haze as best he could. For a second there he was worried. But now the tables were turned, and it was time to exact sweet, sweet revenge for all the trouble he caused.

    Removing his hand from Nick''s throat, who coughed in response, sucking in air like a vacuum, Buchi drew it back, intending to send it right through the smug bastard''s face.

    "Any last words?" Buchi asked condescendingly. Not that he actually cared what he had to say, it was just a bit of mocking courtesy.

    Nick was about to tell him to go fuck himself, when his hand brushed against something long and hard in his pocket. Thinking it was a weird time to pop a boner, Nick fondled it, wondering what it was. As his fingers trailed over every inch of it, he realized it was the screwdriver.

    Eyes widening in recognition, his mind came up with one final plan. If it didn''t work, he was probably going to die, so¡­ fingers crossed.

    "Yeah¡­ I got something to say," Nick said slowly, as he removed the screwdriver from his pocket, holding it firmly in his hand.

    "Oh, and what would that be?" Buchi continued to mock, believing there was nothing left that Nick could do.

    Putting on his best, fuck you smirk, Nick gave Buchi his last words. Or at least, the last one''s Buchi would ever hear.

    "You should have gone for the head."

    Buchi was confused for a moment, but only for a moment, as he suddenly had a screwdriver going through his ear and into his brain. He stood there, his body not comprehending what just happened, staring at Nick with eyes full of shock.

    Eyes that slowly dimmed into nothingness, Nick never dropping eye contact until the life was fully drained from them. Afterwards, he was finally able to remove Buchi''s hand from his stomach, as the Black Cat Pirate collapsed onto the floor, screwdriver stuck in his head like a Frankenstein monster reject.

    Nick leaned back against the wall, staring up at the ceiling and holding his stomach in pain. This time it was over for sure. No way in hell he was getting up after that.

    "That was for Pett, asshole," Nick said, gazing at Buchi''s unmoving body. Feeling a nice breeze against his flushed skin, Nick closed his eyes and enjoyed the feeling, before realizing where it came from.

    "...Hope he won''t be too upset about that," Nick mumbled. Well, if the old guy was angry about the holes, he would just blame the corpse. Not like he could defend himself.

    "Alright. Time to get out of here," Nick said to himself, limping toward the exit. Hopefully Zoro had an easier time of things than he did. Actually, no, he hoped he had it just as rough. Nick wouldn''t hear the end of it if Zoro still looked all prim and proper after his battle and Nick showed up with more blood on the outside of his body than the inside.

    He left the moonlit room without a second glance.

    Battle for Syrup Village!

    Nick vs Buchi

    Winner: Nick

    It took him longer than he would like to admit to find the swords again, and an embarrassingly long time to climb the stairs. But once he did, he was free and clear to hobble his way right out of there.

    Standing at the entrance of the ship, Nick looked out to see how the battle went. To his relief, he saw Zoro pulling at the nail trapping Pett to the mast. "Good, that must mean he defeated Sham," he thought, stepping out onto the deck.

    Zoro finally managed to get the nail out, Pett''s arms dropping as a result. The motion made him gurgle in pain. "Sorry about that," Zoro apologized. He then took his sword out to cut the ropes, when the sound of a creaking board drew his attention. Turning his head, he saw the form of Nick walking towards him.

    Or more like, limping. At least he had his swords.

    "Geez, what happened to you?" Zoro asked, taking note of the other man''s injuries. There were some nasty looking punctures on his shoulder and calf, as well as several cuts along his body, and his nose looked pretty busted up too.

    "Oh you know, had to put down a feral cat. Fell down some stairs. What about you?" Nick asked as he neared his sword wielding friend, noticing him wince slightly when he mentioned falling down stairs. Must have something to do with Kuina. Did she fall down them in this timeline as well?

    Zoro himself was sporting several deep cuts of his own, all over his body. All except his back of course. "Take a look for yourself," he said, indicating where to look by cocking his head. Doing so, Nick was greeted to the sight of Sham, bifurcated through the middle.

    "I see¡­" Nick muttered. It was a pretty gruesome sight, not that he could say much about it. Not after shoving a screwdriver into a man''s skull.

    "Anyway, my swords," Zoro demanded, holding his hand out. Nick rolled his eyes at his demanding tone, but handed them over all the same.

    "What, no thank you?" he snarked.

    "Thanks. Happy?" Zoro asked sarcastically, making Nick grin. "Ecstatic."

    Zoro rolled his eyes, but didn''t say anything more on the subject. His swords were back, he would leave it at that. Instead, he brought attention towards a man tied to the mast. "Great. Now, mind helping me with him?"

    Nick''s eyes widened, looking at Pett as if seeing him for the first time, "Oh, shit. Right, hang on," he said, moving to the side of him.

    "Ready?" Zoro asked, as Nick positioned himself to catch the dying man.

    "Ready," he confirmed. Giving a nod, Zoro proceeded to cut the rope, with Nick making sure the older man didn''t face plant. He knew how that felt, and it didn''t feel good. He gently placed the man on the ground, checking over his injuries. He may not have been a doctor, but he knew basic first aid.

    Nick cut off several lengths of cloth from his shirt and used them to wrap around Pett''s appendages to staunch the blood flow. Next he tied them around the worst of the wounds themselves to do the same. It was a patchwork job, but it was the best he could do.

    "Alright, I''m done. Now we just need to get him to a real doctor," Nick said, wiping a bit of sweat off his brow. Treating the injured while injured yourself is no easy task. But his wounds have mostly stopped bleeding by now, and he didn''t feel faint, so he assumed he would be fine.

    "Didn''t know you knew fist aid," Zoro commented, sounding genuinely impressed.

    "Just something I picked up. No big deal," Nick responded, shrugging his shoulders. Sure it was a nice skill to have but he didn''t think it was especially impressive. But then, a stray thought crossed his mind.

    "Hey, you don''t think Kaya is going to make us pay for these clothes, do you?"

    Zoro raised an eyebrow, "No. Why would she do that?"

    "I mean¡­" Nick said, trailing off and gesturing to the bloody and ripped forms of their clothes. Nick''s was particularly bad, having torn great strips out of it, leaving him basically shirtless.

    "I''m sure it''ll be fine. Not everyone is as greedy as the Witch," Zoro grumbled back, and Nick didn''t have to think about who the witch was. He knew exactly who he meant. But it wasn''t worth the argument. After all, Zoro had no idea about Nami''s background. So he let the matter drop, and turned his attention back towards Pett.

    "Alright, you take one side and I''ll take the other," Nick suggested, and Zoro nodded his head in agreement. The two of them then wrapped Pett''s arms around their shoulders.

    "Now, I''ll count and we lift him up when I get to three, alright? Ok, here we go¡­ One¡­ Two¡­ Three!" Nick said. When he got to three, the pair of them lifted Pett up as easy as lifting a sack of potatoes.

    "Great, now let''s get out of here. If we ran into trouble, chances are the others did too," Nick said.

    "Still worrying?" Zoro questioned as the pair of them began to walk.

    "After this? Yeah. Can you blame me?" Nick asked. No, he couldn''t. Even Zoro was feeling a pang of concern. These guys were just the grunts. Disposable. Who knows what the rest of them are like. Especially the captain.

    The two were about halfway to the exit when Zoro stopped and started sniffing the air, making a face as he did so. "Hey, you smell that?" he asked. Nick gave him a confused look, before taking a few big whiffs. But with his nose all battered and bruised, he couldn''t smell a thing.

    "Nope. What is it?" he asked, watching as Zoro kept sniffing like he was a bloodhound.

    "I don''t know¡­ But I swear I''ve smelt it before¡­" he said, closing his eyes to focus on the scent. After a few more big inhales, his eyes snapped open.

    "Shit! It''s gas!"

    Now it was Nick''s turn to widen his eyes. What the hell was gas doing here? More importantly, why was it here? He could only think of one reason, and if he was right¡­

    "We need to move, now!" Nick commanded. Agreeing with his companion, having come to the same conclusion, the two began to walk again, faster than last time. But a new noise caught their attention.

    It sounded like something flying, mixed in with the sound of someone farting. The two of them looked up to see a new figure land in the crow''s nest, dressed in one of the weirdest outfits they had ever seen.

    Most of him was covered by a fur suit of some kind, with an olive green jacket underneath and what looked like pink shorts on his legs. On his head was an aviator helmet with similar sunglasses resting on top. A large nose protruded proudly from his face, and he wore a massive grin on his face. But the weirdest part was the massive pink heart right on his crotch.

    "Good evening, gentlemen," he greeted happily.

    "And just who the hell are you supposed to be?" demanded Zoro, glaring up at the man. If anything, his question made the man''s grin widen.

    "So sorry, no time for lengthy introductions today. But seeing as you are about to die, just know that you were killed by Skunk One," he replied.

    "Really? Did your mother choose that name?" Nick asked sarcastically. He stared up at the goofy looking man, trying to place him, but he couldn''t do it. He had no idea who he was.

    "I was told you were the mouthy one. Guess he was right," Skunk One responded, not fazed by Nick''s mockery in the slightest, making him pout.

    "And who the hell is he?" Zoro asked.

    "Wouldn''t you like to know," Skunk One responded nonchalantly.

    "Bastard," Zoro growled at the man, but it did little to bother the man.

    "Anyway, it was nice meeting you gentleman but I''m afraid I''m on a schedule. So sorry, but it''s time for you to die," he said, while pulling out a round object with a fuse on it. The duo''s eyes widened at seeing it.

    "Shit," they both said. Giving them one last grin, the man dressed like the offspring of a flying squirrel and a skunk lit the fuse.

    "Tata," he mocked, before dropping the bomb and flying off, propelling himself by what sounded like farts, thick green gas flying out of a spout right under his ass. But there was no time to worry about that now, no matter how weird or stupid it was.

    The two of them ran as fast as they could while carrying Pett, heading towards the edge of the ship, the sound of the fuse spurring them on. But eventually, the fuse ran out.

    The sound of the resulting explosion would wake up the entire island.

 Chapter 27

    (Warning! Pirates be doing pirate things)

    Nami stared out of the window, watching as Nick and Zoro walked away from the mansion. She understood the plan, it was simple enough that even Luffy could understand it, but that didn''t mean she liked separating.

    Never split the party! That was just common sense.

    Speaking of separating, "Where is he going?" she asked aloud, her voice dripping with confusion as Zoro started walking off in a random direction. Doesn''t he know that''s not the way to the shipyard?

    "Something wrong?" a voice behind her asked. Nami turned around, eyes meeting with Kaya''s. She was laying in her bed, having had an episode as they finished eating dinner. Merry and her helped her back to her room where she could rest.

    "No, just watching the boys leave," Nami said, trying to assuage the other girl''s fears. Kaya seemed to relax a bit at that, giving Nami a soft smile, "Are you worried about them?"

    "What? Why would I be worried about them?" Nami asked, a bit too fast to be believable. The knowing smirk Kaya wore seemed to confirm those suspicions.

    "Oh, so it''s just Nick you''re worried about, is it?" Kaya asked. Nami felt a bit of heat rise to her face, "I don''t know what you''re talking about," she denied, as Kaya giggled in response. It wasn''t a very believable lie, especially considering the conversation they had earlier.

    "If you say so," Kaya responded, mirth still in her eyes. Nami sighed and walked over to the bed, before sitting down on it. Her eyes then traveled to the other occupants in the room, "Honestly, I''m more worried about them," she said in a monotone voice, her eyes devoid of emotion.

    Kaya followed her line of sight, and sweat dropped at the sight, "I-I''m sure it''ll be fine," she said, trying to sound confident. But the nervousness of her voice told a different story.

    Over in the corner were the other boys of their merry little group, namely Luffy, Usopp, and Akisu. They were making battle plans or something, but Nami had very little hope for their effectiveness, hearing how silly they were.

    And just where do they plan to find a rabid raccoon? More importantly, what were they going to use it for?

    "Alright, listen up men! It''s time to put Operation: Booby Trap the House and Protect Kaya into play!" Usoopp shouted, standing up and standing proudly. But the others didn''t look so impressed.

    "That name''s too long," Luffy complained.

    "Yeah," agreed Akisu. But Usopp was having none of their sass.

    "Silence! I drew the plans so I get to name it!" he shouted.

    "Boo!" Luffy and Akisu shouted, causing Usopp to gain a tick mark. Nami could only sigh in exasperation as they devolved into pointless bickering. These were supposed to be the ones they counted on?

    "It''s nice to see them so lively," Kaya said with a giggle. She may have been nervous about the so-called operation they were planning, but it was nice to see them so animated.

    Usopp was normally in high spirits when he saw her but that was mostly for her benefit. He did so to hide just how worried he was for her. She appreciated it, of course, but she liked seeing him being so genuine for a change.

    "Right¡­" Nami muttered, not really agreeing with the other girl. She knew Luffy was tough and all, but it sure was hard to see him as dependable when he was pulling on another man''s cheeks like that while a child gnawed on his leg.

    Nami gave them a few minutes before she could no longer take their behavior. "Alright that''s it! If you''re going to fight, take it somewhere else!" she shouted, causing the three squabbling boys to halt in their fight.

    "But Nami¡­" Luffy whined, as he and the others gave her the puppy dog eyes. But she was undeterred, pointing at the door with one hand, hand on her hip with the other.

    "No, now leave. Kaya is supposed to be resting, remember? How is she supposed to do that with you fighting?" she commanded. Luffy and Akisu hung their heads, as a cloud of misery swirled above them. But Usopp only looked smug.

    "That''s right, all those who disturb Kaya''s rest will be banished. So go on, shoo!" he said, making a shooing motion as he did so.

    "I meant you too!" Nami shouted. Usopp turned to look at her bewildered, pointing to himself in innocent confusion, "Who, me?"

    "Especially you! Now get out!" she yelled. The three of them booked it out of there as fast as they could, slamming the door open and almost hitting Merry in the process.

    "Oh my!" he exclaimed as the three ran off down the halls. Nami stood there, panting in fury as the three morons left. "Idiots," she mumbled under breath, as Kaya giggled behind her.

    "They certainly are lively, aren''t they?" Merry asked, parroting Kaya''s earlier comment while walking into the room carrying a tray with a tea kettle on it along with a cup and other essentials he used to prepare Kaya her tea.

    "Aren''t they?" Kaya said with a smile.

    "Let''s just hope they don''t destroy the manor in their enthusiasm," he commented dryly as he made his way over to Kaya. His comment and delivery caused another round of giggles to escape the sickly girl''s mouth.

    "If they do, I''m not paying for it," Nami said with a huff, crossing her arms over her chest and glaring at the door the boys left out of. The other two occupants of the room felt a bead of sweat go down the back of their necks at her tone.

    "R-right. Anyway, I''ve brought you your medicine, Miss Kaya," Merry stated, placing the tray down next to her on her nightstand.

    "Oh, thank you Merry. You''re too kind," Kaya said with a smile, as Merry began to pour her a cup of tea. He returned her smile with one of his own. "Nonsense, I''m merely doing my job."

    Nami watched this with a curious glint in her eyes, "So, what kind of medicine is this exactly?" she asked, breathing in the aroma of the tea. It was really quite pleasant, she had to admit, and the tea itself had such a lovely shade of blue.

    "It''s called Velvet Blue. It''s a special blend of tea leaves and spices procured from the North Blue, from a delightful island where flowers bloom year round, aptly named, Flower Island," Merry explained, as he finished pouring the tea.

    "Sounds beautiful. I''d love to visit it someday," Nami commented.

    "As would I," Kaya chimed in, sounding rather excited about the whole thing, as Merry added two sugars and a dollop of locally made honey to the tea to finish it off.

    Once done, he carefully handed it to the young woman. She took it from his hands, gently blowing on it to cool it down. After a few breaths, she took a light sip.

    "Ah, perfect as always, Merry," she said, eye''s closed in contentment as she savored the taste of her tea.

    "You flatter me, Miss," he responded.

    Kaya took another sip and some color returned to her somewhat pale face. "Would you like some?" she asked Nami after noticing her staring. The orange haired girl gave her a grateful smile, "No thanks. You need it more than I do. If anything, I need a stiffer kind of drink," Nami joked.

    "I''m sure that can be arranged," Kaya said, giving another light chuckle. Merry watched the interaction with a smile on his face. It really did warm his heart to see his mistress with such a simple look of joy on her face.

    But a loud crash distracted all of them, along with the sound of shouting. Nami groaned, recognizing the voices. "Just what do those boys think they''re doing?" she groused. The three of them stared at the door, wondering if they would hear another cacophony of sound, but all they heard was silence.

    Which was even more worrying.

    "Should I go and check on them?" Merry asked, but his tone suggested he would rather do anything but.

    "Someone definitely should," Kay said. But what she didn''t say is who should do it. When the conversation died off, Nami turned around to see both of them staring expectantly at her.

    "What? Why me?" Nami asked, or more like, whined. She had to deal with them enough, it was someone else''s turn!

    "Well you do have the most experience," Kaya said, somewhat nervously.

    "Yes, you truly are the most qualified," stated Merry matter of factly. Nami glared at both of them, but seeing as neither of them were budging, gave a sigh of defeat.

    "Fine¡­ but don''t blame me if they''re doing something stupid," she ordered. The other two looked relieved, especially Merry, who already had to enforce some house rules on them once today, and didn''t want to deal with the headache a second time.

    "Thank you Nami," Kaya chirped. Nami rolled her eyes, heading out the door with a backward wave. "Yeah, yeah."

    Time to see what those knuckleheads were up to. It didn''t take her long before she could hear the shouts of the intellectually impaired.

    "Hey, be careful with that!"

    "Sorry," she heard Luffy apologize. Curious, she sped up her pace a bit, hoping to see them doing something that wasn''t stupid.

    "And just what are you three up to?" Nami asked as she finally spotted them. Usopp was sitting on top of a ladder with Akisu standing on a step below him. Luffy had his feet firmly on the ground, watching them with curiosity.

    "Oh, hey Nami," Luffy greeted with his usual carefree grin. She watched as Usopp, along with Akisu, rigged up a pot of something above the door leading to the cellar.

    "What exactly are you doing?" she asked, feeling a familiar headache start to form. At least they didn''t have a raccoon.

    "Isn''t it obvious?" Usopp questioned, not taking his eyes off the task he was doing.

    "It''s obviously something stupid," Nami said, crossing her arms over her chest.

    Usopp gave a tsking noise as he gave her a side look, "Oh Nami, it must be nice going through life so simpleminded. So carefree. How I envy you¡­" he said with an exaggerated smug tone.

    "Excuse me?" Nami said with a dangerous glint in her eyes. Akisu, seeing the aura of feminine fury building up around her, gulped in fear, and tried to get his brother to shut his mouth.

    "Listen, if someone comes in through the cellar they''ll be met with my patented, Super Secret Sticky Surprise! They won''t know what hit them!" Usopp responded, looking exceedingly proud of himself.

    Nami was less than impressed however, giving a sigh of resignation at his plan. "These aren''t a bunch of kids trying to burglarize the place. These are hardened criminals. A childish ploy like that won''t work," she explained.

    "Don''t you think I know that! This''ll work, trust me. Besides, don''t you remember how well our Dragon Tank MKll did against him," Usopp said, with a bit of heat to his voice, pointing at a certain rubber man. He didn''t like his plans being doubted.

    "Luffy''s not a hardened criminal. He''s an idiot. Big difference," she explained.

    "Hey! That wasn''t very nice," Luffy said with a pout. He wasn''t stupid, he was just differently educated.

    "Truth hurts," she told Luffy. But seeing as she was being ignored in favor of three morons intending to take on pirates with a bunch of kid pranks, she decided it was time to take her leave.

    "Well good luck with that. If nothing else it might just slow them down," she said, walking away. The others gave her the stink eye, blowing raspberries at her behind her back.

    "She''s just jealous she didn''t think of it first. Come one, let''s get the rest of the house prepared," Usopp said. The other two agreed, and they began to fully put Operation: Booby Trap the House and Protect Kaya into motion.

    About an hour later they were nearly done. Usopp grinned, once more on a ladder, rigging up another trap. This one contained a box full of angry bees. Don''t ask him where he got it. He was placing it above the front entrance, the door opened to allow him to properly set it.

    It was perfect, at least in his mind. After all, who expected bees to fall on your head when you opened a door? No one, and that''s exactly what made it so diabolical.

    He really was too smart for his own good. "Well, what do you think? That ought to protect Kaya," Usoop said, turning to his companions who were covered in various amounts of grime. Akisu with paint. And Luffy with feathers.

    Yeah, they had a bit of an accident or two.

    "This better have been worth it," Akisu huffs, dripping yellow all over the floor, glaring at the long nosed man. Usopp let out a nervous laugh, coughing into his hand.

    "Don''t worry. They won''t know what hit them!" Usopp reassured him. But then, a loud rumbling noise distracted them.

    "Are they here already!?" Usopp screamed, looking around in panic, nearly falling off his ladder. When the noise showed up again, he and Akisu looked right at Luffy, who was holding his stomach in despair.

    "So hungry¡­" he moaned.

    "You just ate!" Usopp yelled, while Akisu watched on in disbelief. It shouldn''t have been possible for such a glutton to exist, and yet, he was standing right before his eyes.

    "Nuh uh! That was forever ago. And all this running around made me hungry again," Luffy explained. The other two could only stare in disbelief. How was it possible to keep someone like Luffy fed? It would take some kind of miracle.

    Or a whole lot of Beris.

    "Ugh, fine, let''s go get a snack from the kitchens. Just give me a sec to finish this up," he agreed. Luffy cheered happily at the promise of more food.

    As Usopp finished setting up his final trap, a massive explosion rocked the house, the surprise making him fall off the ladder this time. He yelped in pain as he hit the floor.

    "What the hell was that!?" Usopp shouted in fear, rubbing his head in pain. The explosion was so bright, that for a second, night had become day. He and the others ran to the window, eyes widening in shock and horror at the enormous flames coming from the shipyard.

    "Hey, isn''t that where those other guys went? Think they''re ok?" Akisu asked with worry. Usopp turned to his frightened younger brother, trying to gather the courage to alleviate his worries, but Luffy''s own concerned scream prevented him from doing so.

    "Nick! Zoro!" he shouted, before taking off, sprinting towards the front door.

    "Hey! Where are you going!" yelled Usopp, but Luffy wasn''t listening. He charged through the still open door, heading straight for the shipyard.

    Nami, who was with Kaya and Merry, stared out of the window, eyes wide with horror. The whole sky was lit up with a violent orange and she was certain she could hear the crackling of the flames, even from here.

    "Nick¡­" Nami said quietly. She hoped her friend was ok, but that explosion was something else. She''s never seen one so big.

    "Oh my¡­" muttered Merry, coming to stand next to Nami staring out of the window as well.

    But the one who was most distraught was none other than Kaya. "This¡­ this is all my fault," she said. Nami and Merry turned to her at the sound of her voice, seeing her sitting up in her bed, staring out of the window with her hands covering her mouth and tears threatening to fall from her eyes.

    "Hey, this isn''t your fault," Nami said, but when Kaya didn''t respond, she walked to the bed and sat down once again, taking the younger girls hands in her own. That drew her attention, and she turned her tear filled eyes towards the orange haired girl.

    "Nami¡­" she muttered, sniffing slightly. The sight of despair on her face broke Nami''s heart. She had to do something to make her feel better.

    "Listen to me, none of this is your fault, ok. Not a single bit," she said, but the look in Kaya''s eyes said she didn''t believe her.

    "But if I just agreed to marry him, none of this would be happening. Nobody would have to suffer because of me," Kaya cried, tears now freely falling from her face.

    "Oh, Miss Kaya¡­" muttered Merry. The young lady really was too kind for her own good. Even after all her misfortune, she still places the well-being of others ahead of her own.

    "Any man who has to use threats of violence to get a woman isn''t worth the time of day. Let alone marrying. He''s just a pathetic creep. And I promise, not a single person on this island would want to see you suffer for them," Nami promised.

    "B-but¡­" Kaya hiccuped and tried to wipe the tears from her eyes, but no matter how many times she wiped, more just fell to replace them.

    "No buts. Everything is going to turn out fine, you''ll see. Nick and Zoro are just fine, and if anyone shows up here, Luffy will send them packing," Nami assured her with a grin. That seemed to do the trick, as the tears finally stopped falling.

    "T-thank you, Nami. I-Oh, thank you too Merry," Kaya said, taking the tissue Merry offered and blowing her nose. Nami smiled as the girl calmed down, as was just about to say something when Usopp burst into the room.The story has been taken without consent; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.

    "Luffy''s gone!" he shouted, out of breath. The others stared at him as he stood there panting. But when his eyes met Kaya''s, he shouted in concern. "Kaya, what''s wrong!?"

    He ran up to her and began looking her over, making the distraught girl giggle at his worry, a happy blush on her face. "I''m ok, Usopp, really."

    "Oh, that''s good. You had me worried for a second there," he said, taking a step back from the girl. The two of them stared into each other''s eyes, slowly becoming lost in the moment, before an angry ginger interrupted them.

    "Hang on, what were you saying about Luffy?" Nami asked. Usopp snapped out of his trance, blinking in confusion at the angry woman, before her question sunk into his mind.

    "Oh, right! When Luffy heard the explosion he ran out the front door. Probably to go check on the others," Usopp responded.

    "That idiot!" Nami growled, frightening the others in the room from her pure rage. "We were counting on him to make sure nothing happened here. Now what are we supposed to do?"

    The others watched her pace around the room fuming, before she stopped and her eyes landed on Usopp. He gulped, and his knees started shaking. She looked like she wanted to kill him.

    "But I''m too young to die!" he screamed in his head. Nami stalked up to him and he closed his eyes, preparing for the worst. But when all she did was start to pull him towards the exit, he opened them, confused and relieved at the same time.

    "Come on! Without Luffy it''s up to us. Merry, you stay here and look after her, would you?" she asked, leaving out the door.

    "Hey, wait a second!" Usopp shouted.

    "Of course," Merry agreed.

    Once the two of them left, Merry locked the door. They could still hear Usopp screaming as he was dragged down the hall.

    "Do you think he''ll be alright?" Kaya asked with concern, eyes red from crying.

    "We can only hope," Merry responded.

    *Line Break*

    Nick and Zoro popped out of the water, clinging to the shore as they dragged themselves and Pett out of the sea. Nick started coughing up water as he flopped over, completely drained from the ordeal.

    "You still alive?" he asked Zoro after a minute, panting for breath. The swordsman was sitting there, staring at the burning ship, eyes reflecting an equal amount of anger to the roaring blaze.

    "What do you think?" he asked. Nick gave him a look but didn''t say anything further. He was alive, and that was good enough for him. He forced himself into a sitting position, as he too stared at the inferno.

    "Well shit¡­" he said. Well, at least he didn''t have to be worried about Pett getting upset about the holes he put in the ship. Because, you know¡­ it was burning.

    "Come on. We need to get back to the others," Zoro said, standing up. He was right, Nick knew that, but his whole body protested the very thought of more movement. Not only did it likely have rabies from Buchi biting him, it was also severely waterlogged.

    But since when did he listen to his body? That thing was an idiot. If he took his advice, Nick would eat nothing but cake, pizza,and peanut butter for every meal. And as good as that sounded, he needed more than that.

    You know, like vegetables and stuff. Fruit too, probably. Especially if he was going to be sailing around the world. If he got scurvy and lost all his teeth, then Nami might not want to get kissy with him.

    And that just couldn''t be allowed!

    "Right. Guess there really is no rest for the wicked, is there?" Nick joked, as he forced himself to his feet. It felt like he just spent several hours lifting heavy weights, but that wouldn''t stop him.

    "We should probably get the old guy somewhere safe first," Nick said, looking at the pale form of Pett as he struggled to take in air. He most likely got some water in his lungs to go with the blood. Not good.

    "Right," Zoro agreed. Together, the two of them flung the older man''s arms over their shoulders once more and began to carry him out of the shipyard. As they reached the halfway point, they could see lights in the distance.

    "Guess the whole town is up now, huh?" Nick said, as they continued to leave. The lights, likely torches, were coming closer and closer to the shipyard. Whoever it was would be upon them soon enough. Hopefully, they didn''t mistake them for the arsonist.

    "Can you blame them? My ears are still ringing¡­" Zoro complained. Nick chuckled, feeling the same. And he thought the tinnitus he got from fighting the damn cat was bad, it didn''t hold a candle to this. His head was pounding worse than when he woke up in the jail cell in Shells Town.

    Fuck that hangover hurt. And the vomit stunk to high heaven. So did his shit bucket. So did he from the piss covering his everything¡­ Maybe it was best to just forget that time of his life¡­

    Although, he did meet Nami there, so it wasn''t all bad.

    "Hey, there''s someone over here!" shouted a voice, dragging Nick out of his reverie. Probably for the best, as he was starting to think of Nami again, and we all know where that leads.

    Hearing the man shout, several people came running, until Nick and Zoro were staring down a multitude of people.

    "Who the hell are you people? Are you the ones responsible for this?" one asked, anger and fear present in his voice in equal measure. He and the others were all carrying makeshift weapons, such as shovels, hammers, broomsticks, and one guy had a fucking frying pan.

    Not that Nick would dismiss the humble frying pan. He watched DBZ. He saw what Chi-Chi could do with one of those things.

    "Damn it, we don''t have time for this. What a pain in the ass," muttered Zoro, growing frustrated by the slow progress they were making. If he was on his own he could have been back at the mansion by now. But he had to get Pett to a doctor and make sure Nick didn''t get lost again.

    "What did you say!?" shouted a villager. They all gripped their "weapons" tighter, ready to use them at a moment''s notice.

    Feeling an escalation about to happen, Nick decided to be the voice of reason, as terrifying as that thought is, and try to calm everybody down.

    "Listen, we don''t have time to explain everything. Kaya hired us to stop the attacks, that''s the gist of it. The shipyard was attacked and several people have been killed. We also need to get this man to a doctor," Nick explained, calmly and quickly.

    The group of angry villagers started murmuring and glancing at each other, unsure of what to do. This is the problem with crowds, everyone expected the next person to be the one to do something, and so nothing ever gets done.

    "Hang on a second, isn''t that Pett?" questioned some rando from the crowd.

    "Hey yeah! What happened to him?" questioned another.

    Nick quickly grew frustrated at the morons standing around waiting for someone to make a decision, and decided to abandon the voice of reason. That guy was a loser anyway.

    "Oi, he needs a doctor not a bunch of layabouts with their thumbs up their asses! So either go get one or tell us which way to go, I don''t care which!"

    The crowd took a step back in fright, but did little else. It looked as if Nick and Zoro would have to just force their way past the crowd until a voice spoke up.

    "No need to shout, I''m right here," stated a somewhat elderly voice. The crowd parted, and a middle aged man walked through them, wearing a white coat with a stethoscope around his neck. His hair was thin and combed over, with a scraggly, unkempt beard covering his face. He wore a pair of thick glasses, and the rest of his clothes looked disheveled, like he threw them on in a hurry.

    Which he probably did.

    "Figured somebody would need medical attention so I made my way over here right away. You can call me Shingo. Now, let me see the patient," he said, walking up to the two of them.

    "Well it''s about tim-" but Zoro''s admonishment was interrupted by the sound of another explosion, this one coming from town. The whole group looked up, seeing smaller, but no less concerning flames erupting from inside the village.

    "You''ve gotta be kidding me¡­" Nick said. He vaguely remembered that pirates were supposed to invade the town in the anime, but they never got to do so thanks to Luffy and the others. But it looks like things were a bit different this time.

    "Shit. Come on, let''s go," Zoro said, eyes meeting Nick''s. A silent communication happened between them, and Nick nodded his head in agreement.

    "Right. Hey doc, take care of the old guy would you? He''s been through a lot," Nick said, as he and Zoro gently lowered the man to the ground. The doctor looked bewildered for a moment, staring at the clearly injured men.

    "What? But you can''t go out there. You need treatment of your own. Hey!" he shouted, as Zoro ignored him, walking through the crowd of people who eagerly moved out of the way for him, his angry face parting them like the red sea.

    "Come on doc, don''t you know the wicked never get to rest? Hell, it looks like they''re working overtime tonight," Nick joked, moving past the doctor. Nobody stopped him either as he made his way through the crowd of onlookers.

    "We''ll send anyone we find this way, alright? So be prepared," Nick said, as he and Zoro began to run towards the town. Shingo stared at them for a moment, before a cough reminded him of the situation at hand. He could gripe about them later, if they lived. Right now, he had a job to do.

    As the two sped towards the town, Nick hoped Zoro''s battle sense would keep him going in the right direction, because he didn''t have time to look after him if he got lost. Unknowingly to Nick, Zoro was having very similar thoughts about him.

    After a few minutes of running, they finally saw the town, stopping to take in the carnage in front of them. People were screaming and pirates were cheering. "Tsk, bastards. Come on, let''s take out the trash," Zoro said. Nick agreed wholeheartedly, even if his body was still trying to get him to stop.

    "Don''t worry, I got your back," Nick said. But before the two of them could charge into the fray, Nick spotted something leaning against the fence, something that made his face split into a grin.

    *Line Break*

    A young woman ran with everything that she had, holding her young daughter''s hand as they made their way through the chaos all around them. The smell of smoke stung her nose and the sound of screams traumatized her ears as people she knew and loved, people she had known all her life, died all around her.

    "Mommy, I''m scared!" cried her daughter. Tears fell freely from her eyes as she tried her best to keep up with her mother.

    "I know baby, but I need you to be brave right now, ok? We have to keep moving," she said, trying her best to keep her emotions in check as they desperately tried to escape the village. It was made all the harder from the feminine pleas for mercy she could hear as they were violated.

    Nothing would ever be the same. Their whole world was turned upside down in a single moment. But as long as she could assure her daughter''s safety, she would overcome this.

    The edge of the town was in sight, and she could feel hope rising in her chest. They were almost free from this nightmare. Just a little more, and they could escape to safety.

    But hope was an easy thing to lose, and life likes to find any opportunity it could to snatch it away. The daughter, already struggling to keep up with her mother, tripped over her own feet, landing hard on the ground.

    "Mary!" shouted the woman in panic, stopping to get her daughter. The young girl pushed herself to her hands and knees, rubbing her eyes as tears started to fall.

    "Owie! Mommy it hurts!" she cried as she began to ball her eyes out. Her mother knelt down, grabbing her into her arms, intent on picking her up and carrying her.

    "I know sweetheart, but we need to go, now!" she shouted. She stood up to continue her escape but her path was blocked by a large, rotund body.

    "And just where do you think you''re going?" he asked with a sneer. The man in front of her was dirty, with a shirt three sizes too small that was unable to cover his entire stomach. He held a cutlass in one of his hands.

    A cutlass covered in blood.

    "S-stay away from me!" she shouted, backing away from the ugly, dirty man. But her pleas only seemed to amuse him. He advanced with a hungry look in his eyes, licking his lips as he looked her up and down.

    "Aw, come on¡­ Don''t be like that. Why don''t you ditch the brat and the two of us can have a real good time?" he suggested, though it wasn''t really a suggestion. She knew her compliance wasn''t a factor.

    She continued to back away, looking for a way to escape, which only got a chuckle from the man stalking her. "We can do this the easy way, or we can do this the hard way. The choice is yours," he said with a sick smile, taking perverse pleasure from her fear.

    "No! Don''t come near me!" she shouted as she turned to run. But before she could take more than a single step, a sharp pain was felt from her head. She dropped her daughter, hands going to her head to try and remove the hand gripping onto her hair.

    "Ahh! Let go!" she cried, but she would once again be ignored. The sad excuse for a man forced her face down into the ground, pinning her there with his same sick smile.

    "You know, I''m kind of glad you wanted to do this the hard way. I just love the thrill of breaking in a stubborn bitch like you," he said, before licking her cheek. The tears fell freely from her face as her gaze met her terrified daughter''s.

    "Run Mary! Run!" she screamed, as the man above her began to tear her clothes off. But the panic-stricken girl couldn''t bring herself to move, sitting there petrified as her mother was reduced to a sobbing mess, unable to stop the man from taking what he wanted.

    "Don''t worry little girl. Your mommy will come to like it soon enough, I promise hehehe," the man grinned, his putrid breath making the woman want to vomit. Actually, everything about the man made her want to vomit.

    Her dress was in tatters by now, and the man couldn''t wait to claim his prize any longer. He began to undo his belt, fiddling with the buckle when he was struck in the head by something hard.

    He landed on the ground next to his victim, cradling his skull. He brought his hands in front of his face, and saw them covered in red.

    "Ah, fuck that hurt! Alright, who''s the dead man?" he screamed, looking around for his attacker, only to receive a boot to the face. His head slammed back into the ground as he let out another curse. But his tirade was cut short by something pressing against his throat.

    "You know, I really can''t stand guys like you. Gives the rest of us a bad name," said a deep, angry voice. The pirate opened his eyes, staring at a tall, brown haired man with blue eyes.

    But it wasn''t the color that frightened him. No, it was the sheer emptiness of them. There was no anger, no hate, no sadness, no joy; nothing. The windows to his soul were completely devoid of emotion.

    He tried to speak, but the object pressing on his throat increased its pressure. Looking at it, he saw it was a shovel of all things.

    "Shh, shh, shh¡­ Don''t talk. I don''t want to hear anything you have to say," the man said, the tone of his voice just as empty as his eyes.

    "You know, a friend of mine once asked if I would have killed a man who threatened to rape her. Do you know what the answer was?" he asked, picking his foot off the ground, raising it up as if to stomp on something.

    The pirate''s eyes widened as he realized what that something was. He tried to remove it, tried to plead for his life, but all his attempts were futile, his cries nothing more than wind.

    "The answer was yes," he stated, before bringing his foot down on the step of the shovel. The pirate had just enough time to widen his teary eyes before his head was severed from his body.

    The man stared at the decapitated figure for a moment, before turning to look at the mother and daughter duo, who were currently clinging onto each other for dear life. He casually walked over to them, trying to appear less intimidating than he was.

    A rather difficult thing after removing a guy''s head with a shovel.

    He stopped in front of them, with the woman hugging her daughter close. "Please, do what you want with me, just don''t hurt my daughter," she begged. The man felt his heart drop at the broken tone of her voice.

    Looking to his left, he spotted a jacket on the ground. He walked over to it and picked it up. It was a bit dirty, but it would have to do. He wiped it off as best he could before making his way back to the pair. He then gently placed the jacket over the woman, doing his best to ignore the flinch she made as he did so.

    The woman was waiting for the torment to continue, but when nothing happened, she opened her watery eyes and saw a brown, leather jacket covering her frame. Confused, she turned back to the man, seeing him give her a kind, reassuring smile.

    "Hey there''s no need to be afraid. My name is Nick, and I''m not here to hurt you, I promise," he said, as tenderly as he could. Her eyes were wide, filled with disbelief, as the man spoke once again.

    "We''re sending whoever we can to the shipyard. There''s people already there and it should be safe. Do you think you can make it?" he asked kindly.

    "I¡­I¡­" she said, but couldn''t force any more words from her mouth. Nick then turned his attention to the little girl, hoping he could get her to help the traumatized woman.

    "Hello there, what''s your name?" he asked. She poked her head out from behind her mother''s arms to stare at the man. Seeing as he wasn''t trying to hurt them, she gave a timid, quiet response.

    "M-Mary."

    "Well it''s nice to meet you Mary. I''m Nick. Now, do you think you can do something for me?" he asked. She sniffled, and wiped the tears from her eyes, giving him another nod.

    "Great. What I need you to do is help your mother here get to the shipyards? Only a big girl can do this, and only if she''s brave. Can you do that Mary? Can you be brave for me?" he asked. Mary''s eyes widened before she wiped the last of her tears from her eyes. Once he could see them again, they were filled with nothing but determination.

    "Yes! I can be brave for mommy!" she shouted. Her mother nearly burst into tears again at hearing the courage her daughter was displaying. Nick gave her a grin, before standing up to his full height.

    "Atta girl. I knew I could count on you," he said, making her grin back at him. He then held his hand out for the woman to take. It took her a moment, part of her still not believing she was just saved right in the nick of time.

    But she eventually took his hand, and he pulled her to her feet. Once she was standing, she clung to the jacket as tight as she could to hide her bare skin as much as possible.

    "How can I ever thank you?" she asked, with tears of gratitude, rather than despair, threatening to fall from her eyes. Nick looked confused for a moment, before another soft smile lit up his face.

    "Tell you what. Make sure she grows up big and strong, and we''ll call it even. Alright?" Nick asked, as he walked around the pair, seeing Zoro cutting down a couple more pirates in the distance.

    The woman looked down at her daughter, who gave her a big, happy smile in return. The world around them might have been burning down, but they were given a second chance, and she would make sure not to waste it.

    "Yeah, I can do that," she said softly. But her daughter wasn''t nearly so soft spoken in her gratitude.

    "By Nick! Thank you for saving my mommy and me!" she shouted. Nick smiled, giving them a backwards wave as he walked further into the hell raging all around them.

    Nick made his way over to Zoro, counting no less than five bodies surrounding him. Dude really got to work when he was motivated. He whistled with appreciation as he came to stand beside him.

    "Whew, not bad. Not sure I even need to be here," he said, placing his shovel over his shoulder. Zoro glared at him from the corner of his eye, swiping the blood from his blade.

    "Don''t even think about leaving. If I have to deal with these clowns, then so do you," he said. His gaze then went to the shovel the other man was carrying. "Still can''t believe you stopped to pick up that thing."

    "What do you mean? What else am I supposed to use to dig a grave?" Nick said with a chuckle. Zoro rolled his eyes, but he had a smirk on his face nonetheless.

    "Well, I hope you''re ready to do a whole lot of digging," he said, staring at the crowd of pirates who gathered around them. Nick stared at the group of assorted thugs, thieves and ne''er-do-wells, a light smirk still on his face.

    "Aw you got me a present? You shouldn''t have?"

    Zoro snorted in amusement, but the rest of them weren''t so happy about his words. "What did you say, asshole!? Just who do you think you are!?" one of them shouted. Nick grinned, eyes alight with mischief.

    "I''m glad you asked!" Nick shouted, spinning his shovel like a staff, its movements little more than a blur.

    "You wish to know of my identity? Then open up your ears and listen well, for I will only say this once!" he shouted, making a pose, as everyone watched flabbergasted.

    "I am the man unrivaled in all the blues! The very heavens themselves tremble at my name!" he continued, spinning his head around in a circle like he was at a rock concert.

    "Men wish they could be me! Women wish they could be with me! Defeater of clowns and furries alike, even babies stop crying to stare at me in awe! I am¡­" Nick began hopping back and forth on one foot, doing some kind of dance.

    He then stopped, making another pose with his hand facing his opponents open palmed with the other still holding his shovel behind him. He gave them a massive grin before shouting his name for all to hear.

    "Big Dick Nick!"

    Silence. Complete and utter silence greeted him after his introduction. It lasted for several seconds, with the only sound the crackle of the fire around them.

    "Who?" one of them eventually asked, making Nick fall to the ground. Zoro smacked his forehead in frustration. "Damn moron¡­"

    Nick should have expected that. It''s not like anyone would actually know who he was or his rather excellent impersonation of Jiraiya. But it still stung his ego.

    "So you''ve never heard of me, huh? Well after today, you''ll never forget me. Those who escape with their lives that is," Nick muttered while rising back to his feet.

    "Ooh, we''re so scared. Look at us, we''re trembling," mocked another guy. Nick''s left eye twitched, and he promised to himself that that loudmouth would be the first to die.

    "And what about you, tough guy? You gonna do a little dance for us too?" laughed the same guy, followed by the rest of his circle jerk buddies.

    "Nope. I''m just going to kill you," Zoro said, making most of them shut up. Nick however, rolled his eyes at his partner.

    "Oh come on Zoro, what''s wrong with a little showmanship?" Nick teased. Zoro wasn''t having any of it, as he scoffed at the idea.

    "What''s the point? They''re all about to die anyway."

    As the two of them started arguing the merits of styling on their opponents, one goon was able to put a few things together.

    "Hang on a second, I''ve heard of that name before¡­ Yeah, green hair, green haramaki, and three swords¡­ Oh shit! You''re the Pirate Hunter! Roronoa Zoro!" he shouted. Upon hearing this, Zoro and Nick stopped arguing, and the now revealed Pirate Hunter gained a smirk.

    "Oh so you''ve heard of me, have you? How about that?" he said, emphasizing the me part. He gave Nick a mocking grin, who grit his teeth in frustration.

    "Yeah, yeah, laugh it up. I''ll be more famous than you some day!" Nick yelled.

    "Oh yeah? We''ll see about that," Zoro said, accepting his challenge.

    "Argh! Curse you and your hip attitude¡­ That''s it, I challenge you! I bet I can kill more of these two-bit thugs than you," Nick yelled, pointing his finger at Zoro. The aptly named thugs glared at him, with several shouting expletives, but they were completely ignored.

    "Hn, sounds interesting. What are the stakes?" Zoro asked with a cocksure grin on his face.

    "Hmm¡­ Let''s see¡­ Oh, I know! How about whoever loses has to be Luffy''s babysitter the next time we land on an island with a large town?" Nick suggested. At hearing the stakes, Zoro actually gave a pause.

    Dealing with Luffy when it was just them was hard enough, but in a crowded city? That would be next to impossible. Hell, he even got damn near eaten by a bird on their way to an island. Did he really want to risk babysitting him in place crawling with people and things that would easily distract him?

    Seeing Zoro''s hesitation, Nick gave a grin, "Ah, don''t tell me the great and powerful Pirate Hunter is scared? Bawk bawk bawk," Nick mocked, making chicken sounds. Zoro gained a tick mark and glared at the older man.

    "Fine, you''re on! But don''t come crying to me when you''re stuck with him!"

    The two then shook hands, cementing the agreement. Each one gave the other a smirk, confident they would be the one to come out victorious. But that was only the outward appearance. Inwardly, Nick was freaking out.

    "Gah, what the hell was I thinking! There''s no way I can beat more guys than Zoro! Shit, now I''m going to have to babysit that hyperactive rubber moron!"

    "Oi, quit ignoring us you bastards!" yelled a voice from the crowd, drawing Nick out of his thoughts. The two of them turned to face the group, and saw them seething with rage.

    "Geez, what''s your guys'' problem?" Nick asked. This seemed to only provoke them even further.

    "Maybe they''re just eager to die," suggested Zoro, looking bored.

    "It''s sad to see so many people suicidal," Nick lamented.

    "Do you really think you can take on all of us you cocky bastards!?" screamed some nameless dude in rage.

    "Let''s find out, shall we?" Zoro said with a bloodthirsty look in his eyes while placing his third sword in his mouth.

    "You know, it might be difficult if one more shows up," Nick jested, as both parties readied themselves for combat. He may have been cracking jokes and making light of the situation, but that was just to contain the fury inside him demanding to be let free. The sight of everything around him making him angrier than he''s ever been. Especially after saving that woman and her daughter.

    So he was more than a little eager to engage in some violence.

    "Guess that''ll be the one I have to take care of then," Zoro responded. Nick smirked as the two of them charged at their opponents.

 Chapter 28

    Luffy sprinted from the house, kicking up a cloud of dust as he pushed his legs to the limit. He ignored the shouts of the guards as he barreled past them, his whole focus on reaching the shipyards and making sure his friends were ok.

    As he passed through the gates and started down the dirt road, he saw a familiar face, along with an unfamiliar one. It was the butler from earlier, along with a weird guy in fancy clothes and heart shaped sunglasses.

    Luffy skidded to a stop so he wouldn''t run the duo over, covering the two in a cloud of dust, making the second guy cough. Klahadore only seemed to be irritated by the fact that his pressed suit was now covered in dust.

    "Hey, I know you. You that jerky butler from earlier. What are you doing here?" Luffy asked. Klahadore gained a minor twitch to his left eye, and Jango thought for sure the kid was about to die. But his Captain was able to reel in his anger, taking a deep calming breath before answering.

    "Indeed I am. My name is Klahadore. I am merely returning after completing my errands. If I may ask, where are you rushing off to in such a hurry?"

    "My friends are at the shipyards. I have to make sure they''re ok," Luffy said as he went to go around Klahadore. But the butler stopped him before he could.

    "If I might make a suggestion? It would be much faster if you cut through the woods. It''s a¡­ shortcut if you will."

    Luffy gave him a look before turning to face the woods. "Oh, I getcha. That makes sense," Luffy said in an aha kind of voice. He then ran towards the tree line, but before he could cross, he turned back to the pair and gave them a grin.

    "Hey, thanks a bunch. Maybe you aren''t such a jerk after all. See ya!"

    With that he charged off into the woods at breakneck speeds. Jango turned to his Captain, a question on his lips. "Are you sure that was wise? Letting him know about that shortcut?"

    Klahadore, or rather, Kuro, adjusted his glasses, leveling his companion with a condescending glare. "Are you questioning my intelligence?" he asked, implying more than a threat.

    "Wha? No, I would never dream! I was just wondering is all!" Jango shouted in fear. Insulting his Captain''s brain was a sure fire way to find yourself in an early grave.

    "Is that right? Well, if it will ease your concerns I expect he will find himself lost amongst the trees for some time. Now, don''t question me again," Kuro commanded, which received an appropriately rapid nod in agreement from Jango.

    "Good, now let us continue to the mansion. I hope I don''t have to explain the plan again. I would be most displeased if that were the case," Kuro said. Jango gulped, doing his best to ease the volatile man''s concerns.

    "Not at all boss. I know the plan like I know the back of my hand," Jango assured, holding up his hand as if to prove a point. Kuro kept staring at the man, making Jango start to sweat, before he finally turned away.

    "Good. Now, I have to go meet our¡­ allies. I expect you to complete your assignment in the allotted time, is that understood?"

    "Roger that, Captain! I won''t let you down!" Jango saluted.

    "For your sake, I hope that''s true," he said, adjusting his glasses one last time before walking off. Jango released a sigh in relief, wiping the sweat from his brow.

    "Man, the Captain sure is scary. It almost makes me glad this will be the last time we work together. Now, let''s get this plan started, shall we?" he said to himself, turning to face the large mansion ahead of him.

    As he started up the road, he looked at the back of his hand and saw a tear in his glove. "Huh, well that''s new¡­"

    *Line Break*

    Luffy burst through the tree line, panting in exhaustion. "Finally, I made it out. I thought that butler guy said this was a shortcut. Stupid Klaha-whatever his name is," he grumbled, staring out at the shipyard, eyes focused on the blazing fire coming from the ship.

    Turns out, the shortcut wasn''t a shortcut at all. Even if his sense of direction wasn''t as bad as a certain someone, who shall remain nameless, it was still easy for him to get lost in an unfamiliar forest. The foliage became so thick and dense, that he was unable to see the light from the fire.

    But now he was here so he could check up on his friends. "Whatever, I''m here now. Zoro, Nick, you better not be dead!" he yelled, charging down the path leading into the shipyard. Hearing his shout, the gathered villagers turned to see who was making the racket.

    Only for their eyes to widen at seeing a massive dust cloud heading right for them.

    "What is that!?"

    "Don''t tell me it''s the pirates!"

    "Get ready! It''s almost here!"

    The villagers who were able, gathered in front of the women and children, as well as the injured. They raised their weapons, ready to defend their friends and family to their dying breath.

    The cloud of dust ran past them, making them close their eyes to keep out the debris. When they opened them again, they saw, to their surprise, a young man wearing a straw hat and some rather fancy clothes. He didn''t look like a pirate, but you could never be too careful.

    "Damn it, where are they? There''s too many people," the young man grumbled, much to the residents'' confusion. Who could he be looking for?

    "Hey! Who are you and what do you want!?" shouted a brave soul holding a pitchfork. Luffy turned to him, eyes full of worry yet carrying a hardness that almost took the other man back.

    "I''m looking for my friends. Have you seen them?" Luffy asked. The others turned to look at each other, bewildered, before turning back to him. "Uh, well, what do they look like?"

    "First there''s Zoro. He has green hair and three swords, and he makes an angry face all the time. Like this," Luffy said, before doing his best impression of Zoro scowling. His eyes narrowed into slits, and his mouth was pulled back in a snarl. All in all, it was pretty good.

    "Then there''s Nick. His hair is brown and he''s pretty tall. What else¡­ Oh! He has a scruffy beard too," Luffy described. Lightbulbs went off in the villagers head at his description.

    "Hey, isn''t he talking about those guys who ran off into town?" asked one.

    "Oh yeah, I think he is. Hard to forget a guy with green hair," responded another.

    "You''ve seen them!? Tell me where!?" Luffy shouted, getting right up in their faces. They took a step back in shock from his sudden appearance. "U-um they went into town earlier, when the pirates attacked."

    "Yeah, you just have to follow the road and take a right. You can''t miss it."

    "Really!? Thanks a bunch!" Luffy said, with a big grin. Now that he knew where they were, he could make sure they were ok. He was glad to hear they weren''t killed in the explosion, not that he thought they would die. They were way too tough for that. But it didn''t hurt to make sure.

    However, before he could run off, another voice interrupted him. "Luffy¡­ That you¡­?"

    Turning his head to see who spoke his name, he saw none other than Pett, laying down on a makeshift mat, covered in bandages. Luffy''s eyes widened in panic at seeing his friend all beat up.

    He ran up to him before kneeling down to inspect him. "Old guy, what happened?" he asked. Pett snorted, which caused him to go into a coughing fit. "Ah! Hey, don''t die alright!" Luffy shouted in alarm.

    "I ain''t gonna die. Least not yet. Thanks to those friends of yours," Pett forced out. Each word was difficult to say, and he had to strain his already strained body to do so.

    "My friends?" Luffy asked with a tilt of his head.

    "Yeah. The green haired one what can''t tell his left from his right. And the horny fella who kept sneaking glances at that young lady''s chest," Pett said with a light chuckle. He couldn''t blame the poor lad for his distractions. He was young once too, and if he were able to spend some time with a woman like that, well, he''d likely get a tad bit distracted himself.

    "Oh, you mean Zoro and Nick. So they saved you, huh?" Luffy asked with a smile. His crew was great, and he was glad they were able to save the old guy.

    "Them''s the ones, aye. Just a shame they weren''t able to save me ship," Pett said, turning his head to look at the burning ship. The flames being reflected off of his eyes did well to hide the anguish he was feeling. Not well enough however, as Luffy was able to see what he was trying to hide.

    "Do you know the promise we shipwrights make to every ship we build?" Pett asked, never taking his eyes off of the burning wreckage of his ship. Luffy didn''t answer. Pett likely wouldn''t have heard him even if he did.

    "We promise them that someday, they''re gonna sail. That they''ll see this big, wide world of ours first hand. It''s a promise of purpose. But I¡­" Pett said, as tears began to gather in his eyes, making Luffy clench his fists in anger. He didn''t like to see it when his friend''s were upset.

    "I weren''t able to keep me promise. They made me into a liar. The hopes and dreams of that there ship to see the world, to take folks to wherever they need takin'', is goin'' up in smoke. Literally. Like a baby dyin'' ''fore takin'' its first steps. What a shame¡­"

    By now Pett had tears falling freely from his eyes. Luffy''s own were cast in shadow as he sat there, listening to his friend pour his heart out. But though he was furious, he sat there and listened, until Pett had no more words to say.

    "Hey old guy¡­" Luffy said, getting his attention. Pett had nearly forgotten he was there, so caught up in his own frustrations. He felt more than a bit embarrassed at being caught crying in front of the youngster, but he was too injured to wipe away the tears and pretend it didn''t happen.

    The straw hat wearing future king raised his head, showing Pett his eyes, which were practically glowing with determination. The sight alone was enough to make the tears cease to fall.

    "I''ll make you a promise of my own. I know it won''t bring back your ship, but I''ll make them pay. Nobody hurts my friends and gets away with it," Luffy swore. Pett stared at him for a moment, a bit of awe in his eyes as he was once again reminded of another man.

    Pett chuckled, a fierce look replacing the former hopeless one he had moments ago. "I won''t forgive you for breaking a promise, you hear? So you best keep it," he told the younger man. Luffy stood up, his face alight with resolve.

    "Right, just wait here. I''ll go take care of these guys," Luffy said. And without another word, he ran off to join his friends in the age old pastime of ass whooping.

    *Line Break*

    Nick dodged a swipe to his face by leaning back, feeling a small gust of wind generated from the sword as it passed him. He brought his shovel up, catching his opponent in the chin, shattering his jaw and sending him flying straight up and onto his back.

    "Man, there''s just no end to these guys," he complained, ducking under another attack and thrusting the shovel''s blade into his shin. As the man fell to the ground, Nick slammed his new favorite toy into the back of his neck, likely killing him.

    Not that he had time to check.

    "Quit your whining. Doesn''t matter how many of them there are if they''re this weak," chastised Zoro as he cut down another pair of pirates. His swords looked more red than silver at this point, a testament to just how many he''s taken down.

    Which was about three times as many as Nick, which didn''t bode well for his ill thought out bet. If things kept going at this rate, he was doomed to the life of a babysitter.

    "But don''t you think it''s inconsiderate of them to keep trying, knowing how weak they are?" Nick asked, jabbing the shovel''s blade into a man''s foot this time, almost certainly severing at least one toe, judging by the guy''s screams. But those were silenced soon enough by a shovel to the temple.

    "You may have a point there," muttered Zoro, as he blocked a pair of swords looking to slice him in two, before twisting his body in a circle and cutting them both down at the same time.

    "Right? It''s like, we have better things we could be doing," Nick continued to grouse. He then noticed a man pointing a gun at him and quickly brought his shovel up to block. Luckily, he judged the angle correctly and the metal ball ricocheted off the flat of the shovel, hitting another dude.

    "Man I love this thing," Nick mumbled. He then saw another pirate with his cutlass pulled back, getting ready to stab him. Nick brought his shovel up, but instead of blocking with the blade, he trapped the sword in the hole of the handle at the other end, with the blade of the shovel pointing straight down.

    The pirate barely had the time to look confused before Nick twisted his wrist clockwise, disarming the other man. With the blade of the shovel now pointing up, he thrust it into his opponent''s throat, reveling in the choking gasps he made.

    But he wasn''t done there. Seeing as the cutlass was still trapped in the handle of the shovel, he grabbed the sword''s hilt and pulled it out, at the same rotating his body to the left and cutting into the other man''s belly.

    Keeping up his momentum, he evaded another bullet shot by the same guy as before and threw the cutlass at him. The sword soared through the air, spinning like a saw, before impaling the man in the chest.

    Another one bites the dust.If you discover this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the violation.

    Nick was panting heavily at this point, but he had a satisfied look on his face. He knew they were just mooks, the lowest of the low on the totem pole of bottom feeders, but it still felt damn good to bully these assholes.

    "Hey Zoro did you see tha-" but Nick''s question was cut short by that very same person he was about to brag to go flying past him, crashing into the wall of the burning building next to him.

    His eyes widened at the sight, and he forgot to blink for a moment. But then his senses returned to him, as he gazed at the building, yelling in concern. "Zoro!"

    He growled and turned to see just who or what managed to send the powerful swordsman flying. There shouldn''t be anyone in the kitty cat''s crew who could do something like that. Not anymore anyway.

    If Nick thought Buchi was big, then he was mistaken. The massive slab of muscle in front of him had that fat cat beat by a few feet, at least. He was nearly twice as tall as Nick was, but the weird thing was, it was almost entirely his torso.

    He stood on two stubby legs as thick as a 100 year old tree stump. A pair of massive gorilla arms jutted out from his boulder-like shoulders, nearly reaching the ground. In one of his hands was what appeared to be a tree he just yanked out of the ground. Hell, it even still had some leaves on it!

    He wore a tank top that didn''t quite cover his whole stomach, probably due to how long it was, and a pair of brown shorts. Must be a bitch to shop for clothes with a body like that.

    The big dumb man grinned, showing off his crooked teeth. He also happened to be missing a few. He''d be missing a few more once Nick was done punching his lights out.

    "I heard you was supposed to be tough. Guess I heard wrong. Now I play with your friend here. Maybe he stronger than you," spoke the giant slowly at Zoro. It was like he had to think about each individual word before he spoke them.

    The pirates around him laughed quietly, with big smug grins on their faces. Nick raised his shovel, preparing to fight the massive man, when the sound of something crashing behind him drew his attention, along with everyone else''s.

    Zoro pushed a large beam to the side as he walked through the flames, eyes laser focused on the man who sent him flying. "You good?" Nick asked as he exited the building.

    "Peachy," Zoro muttered, never glancing in the brown haired man''s direction. All his focus was on the big guy in front of him.

    "So, mind telling me what the hell happened?" Nick asked, staring at the green haired man from the corner of his eye, as he directed his attention back to the literal horde of pirates.

    "He just caught me by surprise, that''s all. Won''t happen again," Zoro swore, clenching his teeth against the sword in his mouth. Nick was almost positive that was bad for his dental hygiene, not that he would say that to him. The sound of the big guy laughing brought his attention back to the present.

    "Oh, you alive. That make me happy. Now me get to beat you again," said the massive man. His smirk grew even bigger at the prospect of pummeling Zoro once again.

    "Oi, big guy. You said something earlier about me being weak right? I''m gonna make you take it back," Zoro stated. Nick thought it sounded pretty cool, all things considered, but the rest of those present found it hilarious, as they all started laughing.

    "You hear that Bondo!? He''s going to make you take it back!" shouted some random dude from the crowd. It took the man now called Bondo a few seconds for his tiny, smooth brain to catch up to what Zoro was saying, but when he did, his grin got even bigger.

    "And how you do that?" he asked. Zoro gave a smirk of his own, "Let me show you."

    He then crouched down and shot off at Bondo. The massive man swung the tree at Zoro like he was at a major league game. The swordsman jumped over the makeshift club, rotating in the air as he did so. It took all of Nick''s mental fortitude to not shout, "Do a barrel roll!"

    He thought it though.

    Not slowing down in the slightest, Zoro kept charging straight at the larger man until he was right underneath him. Bending his knees, he then jumped up, lashing out with two of his swords, carving a deep X into the man''s chest.

    "Ah!" yelled the giant of a man, as he stumbled backwards, clutching his bleeding chest. Zoro meanwhile kept rising until he was well above the man, doing a backflip and landing several feet away from Bondo, skidding back several more feet before coming to a stop.

    He looked at the big guy with a smirk, "What''s wrong? Not as weak as you thought?" he asked.

    "Hey Bondo, you alright!?" shouted one of the pirates with him in concern. But the much larger man wasn''t listening, his teeth clenched in rage. He glared with utmost hatred at the cocky swordsman.

    "You bastard! I kill you!" he shouted, raising his makeshift club into the air, preparing to slam it down on Zoro and crack open his skull.

    "Not if I kill you first," Zoro said, entering a defensive stance. With another roar, Bondo swung the tree down, but the green haired man was far from intimidated. Swinging his blades upward, he easily sliced the thick tree in multiple pieces, making the strike miss him entirely.

    But Bondo didn''t see that as the remainder of the weapon slammed into the ground in front of him, kicking up dust and debris, hiding Zoro from sight. So with a big stupid grin, he shouted his victory to the heavens.

    "I knew he was weak! Now I kill his friend too!" Bondo shouted, as the other idiots behind him cheered.

    "I wouldn''t be too sure about that," Nick commented nonchalantly. This stopped the cheering, as they turned to the unconcerned form of Nick, who just stood there with his arms crossed, shovel stuck in the ground beside him.

    "You think I can''t kill you too!?" shouted Bondo in rage. He then tried to lift his weapon up, intent to smash the other puny man, but for some reason, he couldn''t get his club to move.

    "Huh?" he stated dumbly, staring at the thing wondering what was wrong. Did he get it stuck in the ground again? He hated it when that happened. Gripping the tree with both hands now, he tried, with all his might, to lift it up, but it wouldn''t budge an inch.

    "It really stuck this time," he grunted, face turning red from the effort. As the dust and debris began to clear, they could see a figure standing there. They couldn''t make out who it was, all they could see was a silhouette, but there was definitely somebody there.

    "Hey Bondo, look!" shouted some dude from the back.

    "Wha?" Bondo asked, staring at the shadowy specter in front of him. He wondered if it was the ghost of one of his previous victims come back to haunt him. But as the cloud of dust fully cleared, it was obvious that was not the case.

    This guy was fully alive.

    "Hey, I killed you! It rude not to stay dead!" he shouted in anger.

    "Killed me? In your dreams," Zoro said with a condescending smirk on his face. This made Bondo even angrier, as he once again tried to lift his weapon. But it still wouldn''t budge.

    Looking back at the green haired swordsman, he was finally able to see what was wrong. "Hey you! Get off!" he shouted. The reason he couldn''t move the tree was due to Zoro stepping on the other end, using one of his legs to hold it down.

    It was an impressive display of strength, and Zoro didn''t seem to be struggling much. A fact that seemed to amuse him. "Something wrong? I thought you said you were strong," Zoro mocked, as veins bulged in the other guy''s neck.

    "Well, if you want it back that badly, go ahead and take it," he said as he stopped exerting pressure on the club. This created a very simple cause and effect scenario.

    The cause: Bondo pulling up on his weapon with all his might.

    The effect: Bondo''s weapon slamming into his face.

    "Agh!" he yelled in pain, falling back on his ass. He held his almost assuredly broken nose in pain, as a river of blood gushed out of it. Nick felt certain he also had a concussion to go with his broken nose. But then again, did he even have a brain to concuss?

    Bondo stood up, on rather shaky legs, glaring at Zoro. Or at least, that''s what he intended to do. But the swordsman was nowhere to be found.

    "Where he go!?" he shouted in confusion and rage, looking around wildly for his opponent, before a whistle caught his attention.

    "Hey big guy! Over here!"

    Turning to see who had called him, he saw it was the brown haired man from earlier, standing there with his arms crossed over his chest, looking bored. But before he could ask what he wanted, and threaten to kill him of course, Nick merely pointed up.

    Confused, Bondo did just that, as did the rest of the pirates. "What''s he pointing at? I don''t see anything?" asked one.

    "It must be a trick. He''s just trying to distract us!" yelled another.

    "Oh yeah? Well let''s teach him some manners shall we?" proposed a third. But before they could do anything, a fourth halted them.

    "Wait, I think I see something!"

    The rest looked back up, and sure enough, there was something falling towards them. They couldn''t tell at first what it was, but after a few seconds trickled by, it became clear just what, or to be more precise, who it was.

    "It can''t be¡­ It''s him! It''s Zoro!" shouted the first one to recognize just who was in the sky.

    "What!? But how did he get up there!?" screamed another. Nick sighed at their blindness. If only they''d been paying attention. When Zoro released the tree club, he didn''t step off of the thing, he just stopped pressing down on it. He then used the force of it rising up to springboard himself into the sky.

    Not what Nick would have done, but hey, to each their own right?

    Zoro glared down at them, placing two of his swords behind the third one in his mouth, preparing for the finishing move. He figured the big guy wouldn''t be finished off by hitting himself, but this final attack should do the trick.

    "Three Sword Style¡­"

    "Bring it on! I not afraid of you!" shouted Bondo, raising his club up, prepared to unleash his own attack.

    As Zoro neared his opponent, he seemingly disappeared, being replaced by the image of a tiger. The vicious cat snarled down at its prey as it sped towards him, its intent clear. It was enough to terrify the surrounding pirates. The killing intent was strong enough that Bondo was unable to move, his earlier statement proving to be false.

    He was very afraid. So afraid that all he could do was stand there as the tiger slammed into him with an ear splitting roar.

    "Tiger Drop!"

    Zoro swung his three swords straight down, adding all the momentum from his fall to execute a truly devastating attack. Deep grooves were carved into the ground, one for each of his swords, created from the sheer pressure of the swing.

    He then twisted his body and slammed into the ground, cracking it and sending dust and debris everywhere, much like Bondo did earlier only to a far greater degree. He rose from the crouched position he landed in, taking his sword from his mouth as he did so.

    Bondo stood there for a moment, his body having not caught up with the fact that it had been cut. But after a few seconds went by, three large gashes appeared in his body, with copious amounts of blood sprayed out of them.

    His eyes turned white as he staggered backwards before collapsing on his back, never to rise again. His band of pirate buddies could only stare in shock, never expecting him to fall.

    Zoro made his way to Nick, a smug look on his face. "Looks like I''m winning that bet for sure," he said, sheathing one of his swords. Nick however, only scowled at him.

    "That still only counts as one you know," Nick said, bursting Zoro''s bubble.

    "What? Look how big he is. That''s worth three, at least," Zoro argued.

    "The size doesn''t matter. One body, one point, that''s the rule," Nick said, raising a single finger for emphasis.

    "Tsk, whatever. I''ll win no matter what," Zoro grumbled, looking away. That caused Nick to gain a sweat drop at how petulant the man was being.

    "Hey, you bastards! Don''t think you''ll get away with this!" shouted someone from the crowd. The pair turned towards them, seeing the assembled pirates glaring at them.

    "Damn, and here I thought that would have scared them off. Talk about being stubborn," Nick commented.

    "Whatever, fine by me. I don''t care how many of them there are, I''ll cut them all down," Zoro said, causing those in the front of the group to take a step back.

    "We need to find you a better way to deal with your anger problems," Nick said glibly, rolling his right shoulder in circles to stretch it out before grabbing his shovel again, ripping it out of the ground with a flourish.

    "Shut up," Zoro responded. The two of them prepared to fight once more against the seemingly never ending hoard of pirates, when a shout distracted them.

    "Gum-Gum Pistol!"

    A fist seemingly came out of nowhere, slamming into the group of assembled vagrants and assholes, sending several of their members flying. The fist itself was attached to an arm that was stretched to impossible lengths. Nick and Zoro followed the hand back to its owner, as it returned to a normal length with a snap.

    "Luffy!?" they shouted, surprised and confused. Said rubber man turned to them, giving them a million watt grin. "Nick, Zoro! I found you!"

    "What the hell are you doing here?" asked Zoro, as Luffy bounded up to them. He skidded to a stop in front of them, holding his hat in place as he did so.

    "What do you mean? I heard that big explosion and came to help," he stated, before he got a good look at the two. "What happened to you!? You''re all beat up!" he shouted in alarm.

    "This is nothing, just a scratch," Zoro said, uncaringly.

    "Speak for yourself. I''m pretty sure I got rabies," Nick mentioned in a light tone.

    "You''re fine. More importantly, aren''t you supposed to be watching the others?" Zoro questioned. Luffy''s eyes widened in shock for a second, as he slammed his fist into his palm, "Oh yeah. Guess I forgot."

    Zoro sighed in frustration as Luffy laughed out loud, unconcerned. Nick shook his head, just as exasperated as the swordsman. "There''s nothing we can do about it now, so let''s just finish up here and get back as soon as we can," he said, which got nods from the other two, with Luffy even adopting a serious face.

    "And Luffy," Nick continued, staring right at the straw hat wearing pirate.

    "Yeah?" Luffy responded, tilting his head.

    "I know you were concerned and all, but next time, trust in your friends. We won''t die so easily," Nick finished with a smile. Luffy''s eyes widened a bit, before a grin split his face.

    "Shishishi, you''re right. My bad," Luffy said.

    "Well, as long as you get it," said Zoro with a smirk. "Now let''s finish this."

    "Right!" the other two said. But before they could, Nick interrupted once more.

    "Oh, and one more thing. Zoro won''t admit it, but he''s pretty tired. So you should help him out on his side," Nick said nonchalantly. Luffy didn''t understand why, but he agreed nonetheless.

    But while Luffy didn''t understand Nick''s suggestion, Zoro did. "Oi, you cheater!" he shouted. Nick gave him an innocent look, before running towards the pirates.

    "Hey, get back here!" Zoro yelled chasing after him, more determined than ever to win their bet. If that brown haired asshole thinks he could win by having Luffy steal his kills, he had another thing coming.

    Unknown to them, a new threat was arriving¡­

    A few miles out at sea...

    Three massive ships cut through the ocean''s waves as they raced towards their destination. Each ship contained around a hundred pirates, with the largest, the one in the center, containing nearly double that amount.

    "How much longer?" asked a sultry voice belonging to a beautiful, voluptuous woman with long blonde hair and piercing red eyes. She was currently relaxing in the ship''s hot tub nestled at the highest point of the ship, completely nude.

    "Almost Honey Queen. Look, you can see the island from here," said a dopey, nasally sounding voice to her left. This caught her attention, as she swam lazily to the other side of the jacuzzi, staring off into the distance.

    "Oh my, look how bright! Skunk One''s handiwork no doubt," she stated, admiring the brightly burning ship in the distance. But it wasn''t only that, she could also see the town on fire as well.

    "Most likely," said the voice form earlier. Honey Queen made a humming sound as she stood up, uncaring of her nudity.

    "In that case, I suppose I should get ready. Right Boo Jack?" she asked, ignoring the way the fat man stared at her. They may have called each other siblings, but they weren''t related by a single drop of blood. Lucky for her, as she doubted whatever spawned the pig-like human in front of her had even the smallest shred of beauty.

    He wore a mustard yellow shirt with a large J on it that was too small for his girth, showing off his outie belly button. He wore dark yellow pants with a mint green sash along his waist. A pair of suspenders assured that his pants would not fall off.

    Not again, at any rate.

    He also wore a hat that was shaped like an actual pig''s head, only white, along with a white fur cape draped behind him. He really took his pig theme seriously. A bit too seriously in Honey Queen''s opinion.

    She sauntered over to the man, taking a towel from his hand and drying herself off. She then wrapped it around herself before walking towards her room, Boo Jack following dutifully behind.

    Mostly so he could stare at hers.

    "Make sure the men are ready to have some fun," she stated as they walked through the halls. Thankfully she didn''t run into any of the numerous, horny men on board. It would be a shame if she had to kill them before the battle even started.

    "Of course Honey Queen. Whatever you say," Boo Jack responded with a grin. It almost made her shudder in revulsion. It was like he thought she would give him the time of day if he waited on her hand and foot.

    What a worthless excuse of a man he was.

    Unknowing of her thoughts about him, he ran off to make sure everything would go smoothly. She sighed as she entered her room, dropping her towel to the floor. She then sashayed over to her closet, staring at her clothes in ponderment.

    "Now, what to wear? Something to catch my dear Kuro''s attention. Hmm, no¡­ not that one¡­ I don''t think so¡­" she muttered to herself as she threw clothes all about her room. After several frustrating minutes, she finally decided on an outfit.

    It was a form fitting yellow corset with black highlights that made her look like a slutty honey bee. Her upper back and legs were completely exposed. White fur coiled around her slender midsection and two Q''s were displayed prominently over her large breasts.

    Pink leggings crawled their way up her legs, reaching her mid-thigh, capped up with another ring of white fur. On her feet were a pair of magenta high heel shoes. To complete her look, she wore a fancy coat with two different color schemes. One side was white with red dots, and the other was black with purple dots.

    She inspected her appearance in the mirror, turning this way and that, admiring her sensual body. Satisfied with her outfit, she proceeded to the vanity to apply her makeup. There was no way her beloved Kuro would be able to resist her this time.

    Once she was done, she blew a kiss at the mirror, her bright red lips curled back into a satisfied smile. She looked perfect, if she said so herself. But before she could appreciate the stunning figure reflecting back at her any longer, a knock interrupted her.

    "Honey Queen. It''s almost time to disembark," said Boo Jack from the other side of the door. She sighed, giving herself one last look, before making her way to the door. She opened it, and the pig-like man stood there speechless, gawking at her beauty.

    "Well, let''s get going shall we? We mustn''t keep big brother waiting. He''s so eager to meet his new bride," Honey Queen stated, as the two of them made their way to the deck.

    They stood, surrounded by smelly, unwashed vagrants staring at the approaching island with eager grins. But more importantly to her, she could see Kuro waiting for her, standing at the edge of the cliff.

    Oh how it made her heart swoon. They couldn''t make landfall soon enough. And once they did, the real battle would begin

 Chapter 29

    Jango smiled as the gates to the mansion slid open. The men who were guarding it were only too happy to open it for him. Not because they were traitors or anything of such dubious nature. No, they opened them after he employed his speciality.

    Hypnotism.

    It was through his expertise in the field that Kuro was able to fake his own death a few years back and instigate this little plan of his. Jango himself didn''t understand why he would give up the life of piracy they enjoyed, but to each their own.

    Of course, plans rarely survive first contact with the enemy, which is why Kuro had so many of them in his back pocket. Such as meeting the Bear King after Kaya''s parents died at sea. His Captain claimed innocence, but Jango had his doubts. At the same time, it wouldn''t surprise him if his Captain merely capitalized on the opportunity their deaths had provided.

    Not that the ruthless man would have allowed them to live either way, but his plans did need to be altered quite a bit. Plans that now included selling off a young woman to a rather nasty pirate. Jango almost felt sorry for the girl.

    The first part of the plan was to make her frightened, and to doubt her ability to lead the company her parents left her. That was Kuro''s job, subtly whispering in her ear for years about how difficult it would be, especially with her ailing constitution.

    Something else his Captain had a hand in.

    But that plan wasn''t bearing the tastiest of fruits, mostly due to that meddling Merry. Kuro thought of killing the man, of course, but such an action may have actually killed the girl. If Kaya perished before she turned 18, then it would be extremely difficult for the man to get his hands on the company.

    Pesky laws and all that. Normally, a pirate wouldn''t care about such things, but with Kuro trying to go straight, at least on the surface, it provided more than a bit of a challenge.

    Once it was clear that he would be incapable of convincing her to give him the company, he switched tracks. Thus, the Bear King and the attacks. Not only would he frighten her into giving up the business, he would also use her empathy against her. She hated to see the townsfolk suffering due to her own decision after all.

    And now, with the attack on the town itself, it was only a matter of time before the villagers turned on her. "If only you''d just married that man, we wouldn''t have to suffer like this!" they would say. People could be so cruel. Perfectly willing to sentence another to a life of misery so long as it allowed them to live in relative safety and comfort.

    So that was it. Make her doubt her own abilities, frighten her with the attacks, causing further doubt, and make the people of Syrup Village turn their backs on her by spilling their blood and worse. They would practically form a mob and force her to sign the company over, and who better than Kuro, who has ingratiated himself with the villagers and learned all about how the company is run.

    Add to that the promise of safety from the Bear King if he marries her, or retribution if he doesn''t. Given that ultimatum, they might even put her in a wedding dress themselves. And Kuro reaps the benefits of the alliance with the assurance of protection and cessation of all attacks.

    That Bear King sure is a convenient scapegoat. Now, no one would suspect Kuro of foul play at all. The only real concern with the alliance, besides the threat of being backstabbed of course, is that machine he uncovered. Jango shivered at the thought of that man having so much power.

    But Kuro didn''t believe the rumor about it being true. For all of their sakes, he hoped it wasn''t. Otherwise, the title of king might not be just wishful thinking on the man''s part. God might actually be more appropriate.

    Jango took his time to moonwalk up the path leading to the front entrance. With the house''s main defender running off to save his pals, there was really no need to hurry. Once he was inside, it would be a simple matter to eliminate them or hypnotize them.

    He walked up the steps and with a swagger like Jagger, knocked on the front door.

    "Go away, no one''s home!" shouted a young sounding voice. It wasn''t that of a child, so Jango assumed it must have been the one called Usopp.

    "Why would you say that!?" shouted a feminine voice. That must be the other woman Kuro warned him about. The one with orange hair and a temper. Better watch out for her.

    "Sorry! I panicked!" shouted the first voice again. Jango waited there patiently for a moment, enjoying the fear his presence brought them. Usually it was due to his Captain that made people so afraid, so the fact that it was him and him alone brought some measure of satisfaction.

    But no matter how much he enjoyed it, he still had a job to do. Reaching out for the door handle, he slowly turned it, surprised to see that it was in fact, unlocked.

    "Oh crap he''s coming in!" shouted who he believed was Usopp.

    "Didn''t you lock the door!?" screeched the woman.

    "I forgot after Luffy ran out! Quick, run away!"

    Grinning ear to ear, Jango opened the door and stepped inside, "Do you really think you can esca-ack!" but his cocky, self assured entrance was interrupted by something landing on his head.

    "What the hell is-" but he was once again interrupted, this time by the sound of angry buzzing, all around him. It didn''t take much more than a single sting for Jango to realize what happened.

    "Ahh! Get ''em off! Get ''em off!" he yelled, as he started swatting at the pesky insects. But there were far too many of them, and he was soon overwhelmed by the sheer size of the swarm. Causing him to flee from the house

    "Hahaha! You fell for it! My Trick Him Into Opening the Door so the Hive of Bees Falls on His Head Plan worked like a charm!" Usopp shouted from the balcony on the second floor, hands on his hips and looking way too pleased with himself.

    "Awesome Captain! You''re the coolest!" shouted Akisu with stars in his eyes.

    "Wow, it actually worked. But what''s with that name?" Nami asked with a sweat drop. Usopp ignored her completely, choosing only to integrate the praise into his psyche.

    "Yes, that''s right, I am a genius! That will teach them to mess with the great Captain Usopp!"

    Nami rolled her eyes at the pair, turning her gaze back towards the door. The door that was currently wide open.

    "Hey, shouldn''t we close the door?" she asked, interrupting Usopp and his gloating. He and Akisu turned to look at the door, blinking in surprise as the door squeaked slightly, swaying back and forth due to the wind.

    "Oh crap, I mean, well done! You spotted my plan! I left the door open on purpose to lure him into another trap!" Usopp proclaimed, giving a nervous laugh, convincing no one. The other two gave him blank stares, not buying it for a second.

    "And what trap might that be?" Nami asked. Much to her surprise, he actually did have another trap in place.

    "I''m glad you asked! You see, it''s never enough to just have one trap set up, you have to layer them. That''s the mark of a true professional. In this case, we have these!" he yelled, grabbing a paint can off of the floor.

    "Paint? What are you going to do with paint?" Nami asked in disbelief. Usopp made a tsking sound, much like earlier when she first caught him setting up his booby traps. It annoyed her then, and it annoyed her now.

    "It''s not the paint that''s important, it''s the cans. You see, all we have to do is fill them with rocks, tie the handle to one end of some rope, tie the other end of the rope to something high up, and viola, we can launch it right at them and send them packing!" Usoop explained.

    Nami was actually somewhat impressed by the idea. If they managed to hit them in the head, it could do some serious damage. There was just one thing that was bugging her. "Why rocks?" she asked. They should be plenty heavy enough filled with paint, so what swap it out? Unless the cans were empty to start with.

    Usopp appeared sheepish for a second, rubbing the back of his head. "There was a little accident¡­"

    "Is that why Akisu''s covered in paint?" Nami asked.

    "Yes," Akisu stated plainly.

    "Never mind that! Look, he''s coming back in!" Usopp shouted, gaining their attention. Sure enough, they could see a swollen, bumpy hand grasping at the other door, the one that was still closed. Then, his face appeared, just as swollen and bumpy as his hand.

    "Man, those bees really did a number on him," Akisu commented, wincing slightly at the numerous welts covering the other man. Sure he deserved it, but still¡­

    "You little brats! When I get up there, you''re dead!" Jango shouted from below, glaring daggers at them. Or at least that''s what he intended to say, but considering his tongue was stung a few times, it just came out as garbled, slurred nonsense.

    "Yoth bibble sshats! Woon og gerb oop fare, yora boob!" (You little shits! When I get up there, you''re dead!)

    "...Did anybody catch that?" asked Nami, a sweat drop falling down the back of her head.

    "I think he called us boobs," Usopp commented.

    "Well that''s rude," said Akisu, giving the pirate below the stink eye.

    "I don''t know¡­ You two look like boobs to me," stated Nami casually.

    "Hey!" they both shouted at her, faces enraged.

    "Stoop ingobing meh!" (Stop ignoring me!) screamed Jango from the entrance. The three of them turned back to him, as if just remembering he was there.

    "Oh right. Listen, here''s the plan. I''ll distract him with a smoke bomb. Akisu, I want you to start heading down there. When the bucket hits him, he should go flying right out that door. When that happens I want you to lock the door and tie the handles together with some rope so he can''t break it down. Can you do that?" Usopp asked.

    "You can count on me!" Akisu answered, giving a salute. He then ran off towards the stairs, waiting for his cue.

    "Good. Nami, do you think you can hit him with the can?" he asked next, turning to face the orange haired woman.

    "Yeah, I think so. Shouldn''t be too hard," she agreed.

    "Great. Then on my mark," Usopp said, digging into his large, green satchel hanging from his shoulder. He grabbed a little ball, one that looked like it was covered in bandages. He placed it into his slingshot, pulling it back taut, aiming it right below the intruding pirate.

    "Alright guys, let''s do this!" he shouted.

    "Yeah!" they agreed.

    Jango looked up at the little shits who assaulted him with little flying demons. It was hard to see what they were doing, since the bees stung him around his eyes, and it was equally hard to hear as he was also stung in his ears. He knew they were planning something, he just didn''t know what. Not that it would matter. They were just a bunch of kids. What could they do to a real pirate like him?

    "Special Attack: Smoke Star!"

    Jango''s cocky self assurance was interrupted by being surrounded by smoke. He began to cough and his eyes burned even more. "Whag ish thizz!? ("What is this!?") he shouted. It was already hard enough for him to see before, but now he was completely blind.

    The smoke gradually started to clear, though he still couldn''t see anything. Tears fell from his eyes as he spun around, trying to see something.

    "New Nabi!" (Now Nami!) he heard shouted from the floor above him. Confused, he turned to face the direction the voice came from.

    "Root!" (Right!) shouted a female voice. But what did roots have to do with anything? Was it some kind of code word?

    The smoke had thinned out quite a bit by this point, and Jango could just barely see past his own nose. But through his blurry vision, he was able to make out something coming towards him. With a panicked expression he tried to move out of the way.

    "I don''t think so!" yelled Usopp, grabbing another ball from his satchel, this one with a familiar silver sheen. It was one of the pachinko balls he used to attack Luffy when he and his friends first arrived on the island. He loaded it into his slingshot and took aim, before firing it off.

    "Special Attack: Bounce Star!"

    The metal ball traveled fast, its form a blur as it sped towards its destination. It traveled under the swinging paint can that Nami chucked at the intruder, hitting the ground and ricocheting right at Jango, hitting him square in the nuts.

    He let out a high pitched squeal at the impact, holding his family jewels in agony. It was unlikely he would ever be able to have kids. But more importantly than his impotence was the fact that getting hit in the nads prevented him from fleeing.

    Allowing the paint can to strike him right in the face. And just as Usopp predicted, it sent him flying out the door. He flew several more feet, rolling across the ground before finally coming to a stop.

    Akisu, seeing the unfortunate man go soaring out of the house, ran full tilt towards the door. He probably wasn''t getting up any time soon, but why take the chance?

    He slammed the door shut, locking it. He then grabbed some rome out of his own satchel, looping it a few times around the handles before tying the ends together.

    "There, that oughta do it," Akisu stated as he finished his task. He turned to face the other two, who had big smiles on their faces. He gave them a thumbs up, matching grin on his face.

    "Alright, we did it!" Usopp cheered, raising his hand to high five Nami. She stared at it for a second, before sighing with a smile still on her face, "Why not?" she lamented, before high fiving Usopp.

    "We sure showed him! He''ll think twice about tangling with the great and powerful Usopp!" he proclaimed. Nami shook her head in exasperation as Akisu made it back up to the group, getting his head ruffled by his older brother.

    "Good job squirt."

    "Aw, it was nothing," Akisu said, scratching under his nose in embarrassment. Nami smiled at the scene, her own mind going back to simpler times with her own sister. No matter how much they fought and argued, they never stopped loving each other. Not even when Nami joined the ones who killed their mother. Nojiko always believed in her.

    "Right, that takes care of him, but who knows how many more are on their way. We better be prepared," Usopp said, getting serious nods from the other two. Nami wasn''t so sure he was defeated, but it probably didn''t matter either way. Usopp was right about one thing.

    It was only just beginning.

    Jango rose to his feet, slowly. He held onto his nose, feeling the telltale signs of it being broken, namely a warm wetness. Looking down, he confirmed it was leaking blood like a faucet.

    "When I get my hands on them, they''ll wish they were never born," Jango growled, clenching his fist in anger. He wasn''t normally one for torture, but exceptions could be made.

    He tried to take a step forwards, but a sharp, stinging sensation coming from his lower extremity halted his advance. He nearly collapsed back to the ground, but managed to keep himself up by clinging to a statue.

    "I think I''m gonna¡­" Jango then proceeded to barf in the topiary. This was not his night. After expelling the contents of his stomach, he waited for a few minutes until his balls stopped hurting so bad. They still throbbed, but the pain wasn''t so excruciating it prevented him from walking.

    He made his way back towards the front door, each step leading to the porch was taken slowly and deliberately. One wrong move would send the agony racing back to his boys.

    When he did reach the door, he grabbed the handle with a vicious smile, imagining what he was about to do to those damn kids. It would certainly put him on a list, just not one he would have to go door to door explaining.

    But as he turned the handle, the door refused to budge. Frowning, he began to try and force it open, but much to his chagrin, it remained steadfastly obstinate. Growling, he tried to kick it open, forgetting about the delicate ongoing situation in his pants.

    As his foot hit the door, which barely shook from the impact, powerful vibrations traveled up his leg right into his crotch. He stood still for a second, as a gust of wind blew past him. He then fell over, holding his crotch once more, with tears streaking down his face.

    "I¡­ Really¡­ Hate¡­ Those¡­ Kids¡­" he ground out. At least he was able to keep his lunch down this time. A few more minutes ticked by before he made his way back to his feet, using the door to help himself up.

    He reached into his pocket and pulled out a pocket watch, cursing when he saw the time. He needed to hurry up and finish this. If he kept lollygagging, his Captain would tan his hide.

    But he couldn''t get in through the front door, not anymore. Good thing there was more than one entrance. With a dark grin, he started walking around the massive house. He wasn''t going towards the back door, they would be expecting that. Instead, he was making a beeline for the basement.

    Nobody ever remembers the basement.

    Sneaking around the corner of the house, Jango looked every which way he could. Seeing that the coast was clear, he continued on his journey, tiptoeing through the grass and ducking under windows.

    Eventually, he reached his destination. He stared at the stone stairs leading to the basement landing with a smirk. Success. They wouldn''t know what hit them.

    However, upon taking his first step onto the stairs, something happened that he did not expect. Turns out, the steps were very slippery, and his vision was pervaded by the image of a starry night.

    "Huh?" he questioned at seeing this. But his confusion lasted for all of a second before his back hit the hard surface below him. He continued to slide painfully down the stairs, until he slammed into the basement door.

    "Uhhhh," he moaned in agony. He lay there for a few minutes, waiting for the pain to dilute enough he could stand up. Once that happened, he tried to make his way back to his feet. But every time he did, he just kept slipping and falling.

    "What is this stuff?" he complained, hands bracing against the wall. His legs kept just lept sliding in every direction, and it took all of his concentration not to fall. He looked over to the door, knowing he needed to somehow make his way over.

    He tried to slide his left leg over, and was mildly successful, but in doing so, he forgot about his right leg, which decided it wanted to go backwards. Jango fell face first into the cobblestone floor, right into his already broken nose. Now there was a bit of red mixed in with the mysterious liquid.This content has been unlawfully taken from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.

    He groaned as he flipped onto his back, which was harder than you might think. Looking up, he saw something that gave him an idea. The door handle. If he could just reach that, he might be able to open the door and slide on in.

    Literally.

    It was difficult, but he managed to reach up and grab onto it. With his hands coated in the strange, slippery goop, it made holding onto it a challenge, but he managed through sheer determination. Slowly but surely, he managed to stand on his own two feet again.

    "Hah, I did it!" he cheered. But his glee didn''t last long. He tried rotating the handle to open the door, but it refused. He tried again, with more force, and yet it remained unmoved. There was no use denying it, the door was locked.

    "Oh, come on!" he yelled. Unfortunately for poor Jango, this had a disastrous consequence. With his attention no longer on keeping himself upright he found his legs sliding in opposite directions, until he was doing a full split.

    "Ah!" he squealed out, voice a few octaves higher, his hands once more holding his abused lower region. He fell backwards, moaning in absolute misery. His eyes clenched shut in agony, tears leaking from the corner of his eyes.

    Once the pain abated somewhat, he opened his eyes to stare into the gleeful eyes of Usopp. It took him a moment to realize just what, or to be more accurate, who he was looking at, and when he did, he was absolutely livid.

    "You! This is all your fault! Get down here so I can kill you!"

    "I think I''ll pass. But here, have a parting present. Just a little gift from me to you," Usopp said, holding up a box. With a grin, he dropped it, aiming right for the hypnotist''s head.

    "No, wait!" Jango yelled, but it was too late. The box slammed into his head, shattering it and releasing its contents all over. Once this happened, Jango heard, much to his horror, a familiar, angry buzzing.

    "No! Not more bees!"

    Usopp smiled at seeing the man flopping around trying to get the evil little creatures off of him. It brought him no small amount of joy to get one over on some evil asshole. But what he didn''t notice was a single bee, its entire focus directed at him.

    Or rather, his nose.

    "Hmm?" Usopp hummed, feeling something on his elongated appendage. Staring down said nose, his eyes crossed as he spotted the bee, who he swore was giving him an evil grin.

    "Now, wait a minute. We can talk this out," Usopp begged. But bees are just as big of assholes as pirates, and his begging would prove fruitless. His scream of pain would join the man''s down below.

    "Big bro, are you ok!? I heard you scream and-" Akisu exclaimed, bursting into the guest room. He saw his older brother on the other side of the room, closing a window. His concern ebbed away when Usopp turned around, revealing his predicament to the younger boy.

    "Pfft, hahaha!"

    Nami, who was wondering about the noise as well, entered to see Akisu on the floor rolling around in laughter. "Hey what''s so-" she started to ask, before seeing the same thing as Akisu.

    "Snrk, hahaha! Oh my god! Buggy, is that you?"

    "Oh haha, very funny! Let''s all laugh at Usopp!" he yelled, crossing his arms and turning away petulantly. The reflection in the mirror hanging from a wall revealed a big, red, throbbing nose.

    "Oh come on, lighten up," Nami said, wiping a tear from her eye. "What happened anyway?"

    "It doesn''t matter! What does matter is I protected the house once again," Usopp proclaimed with pride. His accomplishment was diminished a bit by his nose, which caused the other two to snicker again, seeing it bob up and down with Usopp''s head movement.

    "Stop laughing!"

    A loud crash interrupted their argument. "What was that?" Nami asked, concerned. Usopp ran back to the window, placing his face against the glass, trying to look down. He didn''t dare open the window again, just in case some of the bee''s buddies got any bright ideas.

    To his surprise, he saw Jango flying backwards out of the basement, hitting the stairs hard. He laid there motionless, a bit red welt on his forehead.

    "It''s that guy. Somehow he broke the door down. But don''t worry, looks like he was hit by a paint can," Usopp said smugly. It was always nice when a plan came together.

    "Another one? Just how many did you rig up?" Nami asked in disbelief.

    "A lot," muttered Akisu. Looking down at him, Nami could count several different colors of paint.

    "Oh crap, he''s getting up!" Usopp shouted. Nami and Akisu shared a look, worry in their eyes. "Where''s he going?" she asked, as they turned back to look at him.

    "Looks like¡­ the basement," Usopp muttered, trying to control the wobble in his voice. Why did that guy have to be so stubborn? Couldn''t he take a hint? They didn''t want him here!

    "I can''t believe he got past the Super Secret Slippery Surprise," Akisu mumbled. Nami''s eyes turned blank at the name. It was basically the same as the sticky one.

    "I know, I can''t either, but don''t worry. He won''t make it out of the basement," Usopp said with confidence. Nami gave him a confused look.

    "Why? What''s in the basement?"

    *Line Break*

    Jango stumbled into the basement, rubbing his head in pain. He was getting really sick of all these juvenile traps. He''d make sure to skin those brats alive if he ever got his hands on them.

    He looked round the darkened room, trying to spot the stairs leading into the house. But it was so dark, he could barely see anything other than black. It was why he didn''t see the paint can coming before it was too late.

    The thought of removing his sunglasses never even crossed his mind.

    Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out a lighter. It was hard to start due to how slippery his hands were, but eventually, he managed to produce a small, flickering flame.

    "There we go," he smirked, the glow of the lighter casting his face in an eerie orange light. He gazed out into the inky blackness of the room, sweat dripping down his brow. Who knows what they could have rigged up down here. He''d have to be extra careful.

    What he saw was mostly wine bottles, placed neatly in racks. If he remembered correctly, the previous owners, Kaya''s parents, were quite the wine connoisseurs. Something they shared in common with his Captain.

    Other than that, there were several items placed in the corners. Since the young lady wasn''t one for wine, they must be using it for a bit of storage. Once she was wed off, he had no doubt Kuro would clean this place out. A wine cellar was meant for wine after all, nothing else.

    He cautiously walked further into the room, looking all around for any sign of danger. It could be lurking around any corner. Each step was taken deliberately, one after the other, in slow measured steps.

    He stopped when he came to a table. Holding out his small light, he grinned when he saw what looked like an oil lamp, just waiting to be used.

    Perfect. That would produce a much brighter flame, which would allow him to see even better. He eagerly grabbed the thing, completely forgetting his earlier caution. Something that would prove to be his undoing.

    As he lifted the lamp off the table, he felt it resist, like something was trying to pull it back down. He also heard what sounded like a rope scraping across a surface, causing the hairs on the back of his neck to stand up. Looking underneath, he confirmed the presence of a fairly thick piece of string.

    He heard something click to his left, and he turned as fast as he could. But he couldn''t see what it was. He placed the lighter in front of him, trying to spot what it could have been, ready to dodge whatever came his way.

    But when nothing happened, he carefully made his way towards where the sound came from, completely ignoring the lamp. He followed the string to where it led, and what he saw made the sweat pour down from his brow even more.

    It was a cage. An empty cage. The string tied to the mechanism that locked it. When he picked up the lantern, it must have opened the lock and released whatever was inside. But what could it be?

    Bending down, he tried to spot any indication of what it could have been. There was a bit of fur, and upon closer inspection, appeared to be black, white, and gray. That didn''t narrow things down very much.

    Just then, a clanking sound drew his attention. He turned to try and spot the creature he knew was in the room with him, but all he saw was an empty wine bottle, softly spinning on the floor.

    He heard the soft pitter patter of feet scurrying around him. He turned this way and that, trying to spot whatever it was, but it was too fast. The most he saw was a bushy tail, which narrowed it down some, but not much.

    But soon, all he heard was silence. Whatever it was had stopped moving, and Jango got the feeling of being watched. He gulped, backing up until his back hit the table, the same one the lamp was on.

    That''s when he heard it. A growling coming from his left. Turning slowly, raising his light up, he finally saw just what it was. He first noticed the eyes, the light from his lighter reflecting off of them. Next was the face. Most of it was gray, but its eyes were framed in black, like it was wearing a little robber mask. The last thing was its tail, lined with several rings of alternating black and white.

    All the anxiety melted away from his body as he realized what it was. "Whew, just a raccoon. I was worried it was a skunk or something," he said, wiping the sweat from his brow. But when he noticed the raccoon still staring at him, he tried to get it to leave. "Go on, shoo! Get out of here."

    But it didn''t. If anything, his actions just made it growl with even more anger. That''s when he noticed something else about the racoon he missed the first time around. It was foaming at the mouth.

    His eyes widened in fear and realization. The raccoon was rapid. "Oh, crap¡­"

    The raccoon then leapt out of the wine rack, claws extended as it sank them into the soft flesh of his face. "Ahh! Get it off, get it off!" Jango screamed as he was clawed and bitten by the furry little monster.

    He fell backwards onto the floor, still trying to rip it off his face, but it was latched on tight. He started punching the furious furry creature, but that only seemed to make it bite him harder.

    Bottles of expensive wine crashed onto the floor from his flailing, but Jango barely noticed. He was far more preoccupied with the savage beast trying to, with more than a little success, claw his face off!

    He flipped onto his front, leaning back till he was on his knees, back erect, before slamming his head into the floor. That seemed to do the trick, as the raccoon finally let go.

    But it was far from dead, scampering off into the darkness. Jango knelt there, panting with exhaustion, "What''s wrong with these people? Who keeps a rabid raccoon in the basement?" he complained, wiping the blood, sweat, wine, and other mystery fluids off of his face.

    "I need to get out of here, but where are the stairs?" he questioned, looking around the gloom for his escape. Unfortunately, he dropped his only source of light in the struggle, being left in near total darkness with a ravenous raccoon.

    He began to feel around the floor, crawling on his hands and knees, trying to find his lighter. After what felt like hours, but was really only a minute or two, he finally managed to locate it.

    "Aha, there you are! Now let''s get the hell out of here," he said, flicking it on. And there, on the table to his right, staring directly at him and growling, was none other than his arch nemesis, the rabid raccoon.

    Jango slowly turned his head, with an almost mechanical twist, staring right into the eyes of the devil. "...Please don''t eat my face." But his request was denied.

    *Line Break*

    Nami, Usopp and Akisu were standing in the hall, hiding behind a corner as they stared at the door leading to the cellar, waiting to get the jump on the pirate they knew was down there.

    "So, that''s where he''s at, huh?" said Nami, being between the two, casting suspicious glances at the door.

    "Yup, that''s it. But don''t worry, I placed my most insidious trap of all time down there. I don''t think we have to worry about him," Usopp said with confidence. Nami looked up at him, giving him a curious, yet doubtful look.

    "And just what kind of trap did you put down there to make you so confident?" she questioned. Usopp stared down at her with a smug grin.

    "Well, you see-"

    "Ahhhh! My face!"

    The three turned to look at the door, two pairs of eyes filled with recognition, and the other with worry. Loud crashes could be heard amongst the cries for help and pleas for mercy. Nami gave Usopp a wary look.

    "Seriously, what did you put down there?" she asked.

    "Cooper," Akisu responded, which did nothing to clear up her confusion. "Who, or what is Cooper?" she asked again.

    "He''s a racoon. One who just so happens to have rabies," Usopp responded. Nami''s eyes widened, remembering them discussing something like that earlier.

    "Where did you get something like that?" she asked.

    "Never doubt the great and powerful Usopp! Something like that was child''s play!"

    Nami sighed as Usopp began to laugh boisterously. She fixed her gaze on the door once more, doubting something like a raccoon would be able to stop a pirate. At least, none of the ones she knew.

    It was a temporary setback at best, and they needed to be prepared for anything. But there was one thing she didn''t understand. How did he get inside the mansion grounds? The guards should have stopped him, and if they didn''t those squirrels should have. But somehow, he got inside, without a single piece of clothing ruffled.

    "Hey, Usopp?" she asked, making the long nosed sniper cease his laughter to give her a curious look.

    "Where are the guards? Shouldn''t they have come by now?"

    Usopp opened his mouth to say something, but found himself pausing. That was a good question. The guards should definitely have heard the racket and come running. So where were they?

    "Good question. Somebody should go and check it out. The dogs too. I haven''t heard them bark once," Usopp said.

    "I nominate you," Nami said quickly, making Usopp sputter indignantly.

    "What? Why me?" he asked, hoping no one heard the stutter in his voice. He may have been a bit scared to run off on his own.

    "Because you know the house better than I do. I might get lost, and we can''t afford to waste time," she said. Usopp hated that she made so much sense.

    "Curse her and her logic!" he thought to himself. But just when he was about to accept, or make a counter argument, Akisu spoke up.

    "I''ll do it!" he said, eyes gleaming with determination. The two adults gave him a look, before sharing one of their own.

    "Listen, I appreciate the offer, but this is dangerous. Who knows what could be wrong? They could be working for the pirates," Nami stated as gently as she could. She didn''t want to put the kid down, especially when he was showing more courage than his older brother, who was shaking in his boots, but she didn''t want to risk something happening to the kid either.

    "But-" Akisu said, but was interrupted by Usopp.

    "No, she''s right. You''re too young to go off on your own and face real pirates. Just leave it to me. I got this!" he said. Though his proclamation was diminished somewhat by his knees clacking together.

    Akisu glared at the ground, tears of frustration welling up in the corner of his eyes. "It''s not fair! Treating me like a little kid. I''m braver than he is," Akisu thought to himself, glaring at the ground.

    Just then, they heard a door slam from inside the basement, drawing their attention. Then, there was nothing but the sound of silence. That was more worrying than anything.

    "Oh great, now what?" Usopp asked, fear in his eyes.

    "I don''t know. Be ready for anything," Nami said. The two of them had all their attention focused on the door, which means they weren''t paying any attention to Akisu. Seeing this was his chance, he quietly backed away unnoticed by the other two, before turning around and sprinting away.

    This made enough noise for him to be heard, causing Usopp and Nami to turn around.

    "Hey, where do you think you''re going!?" Usopp yelled. Akisu turned his head, giving them a determined glare while not slowing down in the slightest.

    "I''m going to see what''s wrong with the guards. I''ll be back in a minute! Don''t try and stop me!" he shouted back.

    "What did you-!? Hey, get back here!" Usopp shouted. What was his brother thinking, running off like that in the middle of a battle. If they made it out of this, he was so grounded!

    "Don''t worry, I''ll get him!" Nami shouted, sprinting after the younger boy. Usopp gave her a wide eyed stare as she ran down the hall. "Wait, don''t leave me!"

    But his words fell on deaf ears as Nami disappeared around a corner. Now he was all alone, in the silent hallway, with a killer on the loose. That''s when he heard the sound of footsteps coming up from the basement. He turned around to face the door once again, shaking like a leaf.

    It sounded like he was coming up the stairs, which means he must have dealt with Cooper. "Oh man, this is bad¡­ Hey guys, please come back!" he shouted. But no one heard him.

    He squeaked when he heard the sound of the door handle rattle. He gulped, reaching a shaky hand into his satchel to grab a metal ball. But when he pulled it out, he dropped it onto the floor, watching it bounce and roll away.

    The door handle began to shake violently, causing Usopp to back away, his legs barely able to support his weight due to the fear. A hard slam against the door made Usopp turn around to flee, but when he did, he saw a painting of a young Kaya with her parents. She was smiling happily while sitting on a swing, surrounded by flowers.

    That made him stop. "What the hell do you think you''re doing Usopp? Kaya''s counting on you, and you try to run away? Why do you have to be such a coward?" he ground out in frustration, eyes becoming moist.

    He wiped away the tears furiously before they could fall, and proceeded to slap himself good and hard in the face to psych himself up. "Right! You can do this. For Kaya. For Akisu. For everyone in Syrup Village. You can be brave!"

    He turned around, knees barely shaking anymore, and confidently pulled out a metal ball, placing it in his slingshot and aiming it towards the door. "Alright you bastard, bring it on! Tonight, you have to deal with Usopp the Brave!"

    *Line Break*

    Jango slammed the door shut, having flung the rabid little beast outside where it belonged. Now he was the bees problem.

    He turned around and rested his back against the door, panting. He was more than a little exhausted. His face had deep gouges in it from the raccoon''s claws, and part of his lower lip had been bitten off. He thought back to when his Captain said these people wouldn''t be a problem.

    Well, guess who was wrong!

    He heard the raccoon scratching at the door, snarling to get in, but it was locked good and tight. No way was that little monster getting back inside. Now he was free and clear to make his way inside the house, and kill everyone but Kaya inside.

    And he was going to enjoy every second of it.

    He made his way back through the room, found his lighter once again, and began making his way slowly up the stairs, each creak of the steps below bringing him closer and closer to his goal.

    He reached the top of the stairs without issue, grinning as he reached for the handle. But that smile turned into a frown when he realized it was locked. He growled as he began to rattle the thing harder. When that didn''t work either, he started shoulder checking the door.

    Once¡­

    Twice¡­

    Three times he rammed into the uncooperative door. And you know what they say? Third time''s the charm.

    The door burst open and Jango stumbled forward. He turned and saw Usopp standing there, aiming his slingshot at him. "There you are-" Jango started, but his tirade was interrupted by a bucket landing on his head, covering him once more with a mysterious liquid. Only this time, it was sticky..

    You''d think he''d learn to watch out for those.

    He tried to get the bucket off his head, but no matter how hard he pulled, it refused to budge. Seeing this, Usopp let out a sigh of relief, nervous chuckle turning into a cocky laugh.

    "Hahahaha, that''s what you get! Thought you could one over on old Usopp did you!? Well you were wrong!"

    But then a smell entered his nose, "What''s that? Smells like something''s burning," he mentioned. Then he heard the sound of sizzling. And finally, he could see smoke rising from Jango''s bucket covered head.

    He was confused about what was happening until he remembered something very important. The Super Secret Sicky Surprise and the Super Secret Slippery Surprise couldn''t come in contact with each other. They had a chemical reaction that, when combined, caused them to explode.

    "Oh crap! What do I do!?" he shouted in a panic. He couldn''t just let an explosion occur in the middle of the hall like this. That would cause way too much damage to Kaya''s house.

    Thinking fast, he got an idea. He only had a few seconds until things went boom, and he needed to get rid of the source right? Well, it was a good thing he was standing right in front of the door leading to the basement. If the explosion happened down there, it wouldn''t cause nearly as much damage.

    Probably.

    Pulling back the still loaded slingshot pouch, he took a tenth of a second to line up his shot. "Take this! Special Attack: Knee Breaker!"

    He let loose the metal ball, watching it soar directly into his intended target, Jango''s left knee. He heard a snapping sound and Jango''s muffle screams of pain before his leg gave out and he tumbled down the stairs. A second later, a massive explosion rocked the house.

    *Line Break*

    Kaya screamed as the entire building shook, covering her head as dust and debris fell from the ceiling.

    "Miss Kaya!" Merry shouted, rushing over to cover her body with his own. But as soon as the shaking occurred, it stopped, and the whole house seemed eerily silent as a result.

    "W-what was that?" Kaya asked, shaking, before having a coughing fit. Merry did what he could to ease her suffering, rubbing her back and offering her another cup of tea.

    "I''m afraid I don''t know Miss. I do hope the others are ok," he stated somberly.

    "Oh, Usopp¡­" she muttered, looking down at the blue tea in her hand with worry. Merry could only give her a sad look as he stared out the window, seeing the dying embers of the fire from earlier.

    *Line Break*

    "Gotcha!" Nami yelled, as she grabbed onto Akisu.

    "Hey, let me go!" he shouted, squirming in her grasp. But her grip was too tight.

    "Will you cut it out! I know you want to help but it''s way too dangerous for you," Nami said, glaring at the boy.

    "Why, because I''m a kid?" he asked, giving up on trying to escape to glare at the young woman. Nami''s eyes softened as she stared into his frustrated eyes. She understood exactly what he was going though.

    "It''s frustrating, isn''t it? Wanting to help but being told you''re too little or too young. I get that," Nami said, gently setting him down. "What would you know?" Akisu asked, wiping the tears from his eyes.

    "When I was your age, all I wanted to do was help my mom with her orchard. We were very poor, you know, and she worked so hard to provide for my sister and I," Nami began, getting a far away look in her eyes. Akisu turned to stare at her. He could have ran, but he wanted to hear this.

    "I would steal things sometimes. Things we needed or things I wanted, but I always seemed to get caught. Not like now. And when I did, she was always there to scold me. "Stealing is wrong Nami!" she would say. "If you want something, just tell me and I''ll buy it for you!" But of course, that was a lie. We couldn''t afford it. I''d yell back, "Just let me help you!" But she just wanted me to be a kid, to enjoy life and not have to worry about providing for a family."

    Nami''s eyes found Akisu''s, who met her stare with a wide eyed one of his own. "And when she died, I was forced to grow up. I couldn''t be a kid anymore. I had something I had to do. Something that no kid could hope to accomplish. Funny, isn''t it? All I wanted to do when I was a kid was grow up so I could help my mom, and now that I''m a grown up, I''d give anything to be a kid again, safe in my mother''s arms."

    Nami wiped away tears of her own, before giving the boy a soft smile, ruffling his hair "So don''t be in such a hurry to grow up, alright? It''s not so bad to be a kid."

    Akisu didn''t know what to do, but he didn''t feel so frustrated anymore. Mostly just sad. So he did the only thing he could think of. He hugged her.

    Nami''s eyes went wide as she gazed down at the little boy hugging her. She giggled a bit, returning the hug, "Ah, aren''t you sweet?"

    Akisu released the hug, giving Nami the biggest smile he could, before adopting a thoughtful look. "But, we still need someone to check on the guards, don''t we?"

    "Yup, so lead the way. I''ll make sure nothing happens to you," Nami said, grinning. Akisu''s eyes lit up with sparkles. "Thank you big sis!"

    Nami chuckled again, "No problem. Now let''s-"

    But before she could finish, the house was rocked by a massive explosion. Nami and Akisu had struggled to keep their balance, grabbing onto the walls to keep themselves upright. The shaking didn''t last very long, and the two stood on solid ground once again.

    "What the heck was that?" Nami asked, sweat dripping down the back of her head. Did the pirates blow up a wall or something? Akisu wasn''t sure what it was either, but it did mean they needed to hurry.

    "Come on!" he shouted, taking off at a sprint.

    "Hey, wait up!" Nami shouted, giving chase.

    *Line Break*

    Usopp stuck his head out from the doorframe, looking down into the cellar. "Hello¡­ Anybody down there?" he asked. But he received no answer. As the smoke and dust cleared, Usopp was able to see the still form of Jango laying on the floor.

    The long nosed liar sighed in relief, holding his chest. "I don''t think he''s getting up from that. And with the stairs all busted up, he won''t be able to get in this way either. Guess my childish traps were more effective than you thought, eh Nami?" he said to himself.

    "Now, let''s just close this¡­" he muttered, gently closing the broken door. He then grabbed a fancy chair resting against the wall and shoved the back of it under the handle. The lock may have been busted, but the handle was still intact.

    "There we go. Now, time to find the other two," he said, running off into the mansion. If only he''d stayed there just a little bit longer.

    Down below, Jango opened his heart shaped eyes. They were filled with rage and pain in equal measure. He let out a ragged cough, flipping to his front and forcing himself to his feet. He stood on wobbly legs that barely supported his weight.

    Looking over at the stairs, it was clear he couldn''t go that way, not in the condition he was in. His body was burnt and charred, every movement causing his skin to crack and bleed. Most of his hair singed off, and one of his ears was missing. His knee was fubar, and his nose was shattered.

    And don''t even mention his poor, abused testicles.

    But he was still alive, and that meant his job wasn''t done yet. "I''ll make those little bastards pay," he wheezed out as he hobbled over to the outside entrance, nearly falling several times. But eventually, he made it.

    He swung the door open, but what he saw stopped him cold. It was the raccoon, who had seemingly formed an alliance with the bees. And they were waiting for him.

    "Oh, come on¡­"

 Chapter 30

    Nick swung his shovel in an upward arc, catching another pirate on the chin. He went flying ass over backwards before landing on his neck. It was safe to say he was no longer a threat, and added one more point to Nick''s total, bringing him up to 23.

    "Phew, that takes care of that," Nick said, wiping his brow clean of sweat, soot, dirt, blood and who knows what else. Best not to think about it. "Wonder how the others are doing?"

    Taking a look around, he saw Zoro finishing up the last of the enemies near him. He swung his swords to remove the excess blood on them, but considering how much there was, Nick doubted that removed even half of it.

    Sure looked cool though.

    The brown haired man didn''t even want to think about how many points Zoro had accumulated since the battle started. If the rate he was cutting them down earlier was any indication, Nick was pretty sure he lost the bet. But he had until the whole battle was over, so he still had some time.

    "And then there''s this guy," Nick thought, staring at Luffy, who just Gum-Gum Whipped about twelve people into a burning building. Shitty way to die, but Nick''s pity well was pretty much empty. He needed what was left for himself.

    After all, the rubber man had almost certainly scored higher than himself after arriving half way through, he felt he deserved some pity. Just not from the two assholes in the lead. Not that Luffy knew there was a competition in the first place, or what the stakes were.

    But still¡­

    Seeing that the coast was clear, Nick took a seat on a nice, comfy barrel, one that hasn''t caught on fire yet. He watched the other two look around for more enemies, saw that there was none, and made their way towards him.

    "Well, that takes care of that," Zoro muttered, unknowingly mimicking Nick, wiping his blade clean using the torn shirt of one of his victims. Once he was done, he sheathed it next to the other two.

    "They weren''t so tough," Luffy laughed, hands behind his head.

    "No, but there sure were a lot of them. What a pain in the ass," Zoro muttered, angry at not being given a real challenge. Even with the wounds he suffered from Sham, it didn''t add to the difficulty of the fight.

    "Tell me about it. I''m exhausted," Nick said with a sigh. Unfortunately, this was likely just the opening salvo, meaning he couldn''t afford to give in to the desire to sleep.

    "Probably because you were swinging around that damn shovel," said Zoro, crossing his arms over his chest.

    "What!? How dare you! Shovels are the pinnacle of human society. They''re cheap, make excellent tools, and can even be used as a weapon. Besides, I don''t want to hear that from a guy who fights with a damn sword in his mouth," Nick argued, pointing a finger at Zoro, who gained a tick mark.

    "What was that?"

    "You heard me green bean!"

    Their arguing was cut short by a building collapsing to the side. They turned their attention to it, remembering where they were.

    "Right. We should probably get back to the others," Nick mumbled, suddenly worried about them. In the heat of battle, he sort of just¡­ forgot, focusing on staying alive. But now that the battle was over, or at least, this one was, his worry returned tenfold.

    "Yeah. Who knows what could be going on at the mansion," Zoro said, looking in the direction of said mansion. Or at least, that''s where Nick assumed he wanted to look. Because he was currently looking in the opposite direction.

    "Wrong way big guy," Nick told him. A blush appeared on his face but of course he didn''t own up to his mistake.

    "Tsk, whatever, let''s go!" he said, taking off in the right direction. Who knows if it''ll stay that way, but at least he was off to a good start.

    "Right! We won''t let them hurt our friends!" Luffy shouted. He thrust his fist into his hand, his eyes hard, before he took off after Zoro. Nick stood up and made to follow when a gunshot rang out.

    "Ah!" he yelled in pain, falling to the ground. The other two, hearing the gunshot and Nick''s shout, turned to look at him, seeing him clutching his bleeding leg.

    "Nick!" Luffy shouted, stopping to run back. Looking at his friend, grabbing his leg in agony, made him absolutely furious. And he wasn''t the only one, as Zoro glared in the direction the shot came from.

    "Looks like we missed one," he growled, drawing his swords. Luffy made it to Nick just as another gunshot rang out. He stopped with his arms raised up, the bullet hitting his chest before being bounced away.

    Zoro charged forward, heading directly towards the soon to be dead man. The other pirate saw him coming, and to his eyes, it looked like a demon was charging at him. He panicked and began firing wildly at him. But any bullet that even came close was deflected by one of his swords.

    There was no preamble when Zoro cut him down. One second he was in front of the guy, and the next he was past him, swords raised with a drop of blood falling from each one. The gunmen then fall to the ground, very much not alive anymore.

    Zoro turned around and saw Luffy fretting over Nick.

    "Hey Nick, are you alright!" he yelled, shaking him like a dog.

    "Luffy, stop that, I''m fine!" he yelled, swatting the rubber man''s hands away from him. Luffy sighed in relief, his gaze lowering to the profusely bleeding wound. "But your leg¡­"

    "It''s fine. I just need a few minutes," he said, as Zoro reached them, staring down at the wound himself. He knew that was a lie, he would need more than a few minutes for that to get in fighting shape.

    "Are you sure?" Luffy asked.

    Nick gave him a smirk, "Of course, I''ll be good as new before you know it. But you guys should go on ahead of me. The others might be in trouble."

    While that was true, Luffy didn''t look eager to leave an injured friend behind. Nick saw his indecision, and decided to give him a little push. "Luffy, I''ll be fine, trust me."

    That seemed to do it, as Luffy''s face broke out into another big smile, "Gotcha. We''ll see you there. But don''t take too long."

    "Aye, aye, Captain!" Nick said with a salute. His (temporary) Captain nodded at him before taking off.

    "Looks like I''ll be winning our bet," Zoro mentioned, staring down at Nick with a smirk. But he wasn''t cowed, returning it with one of his own.

    "The battle''s not over yet. I have plenty of time to kick your ass."

    "Heh, in your dreams," Zoro responded. The two continued to stare at the other, gazes full of mutual respect. Zoro had Nick''s from the start, and these couple of battles earned him Zoro''s.

    Nick''s face turned serious. "Take care of the others," he said.

    "Tsk, what a pain," Zoro muttered, letting out his tsundere side. But Nick knew he was a big old softy at heart.

    "You better go, or Luffy might have them all beat before you get there," Nick said, getting another smirk from Zoro, who began to run after Luffy, but was stopped from getting too far by Nick.

    "Hey Zoro!"

    "What?"

    "You''re going the wrong way!"

    Nick watched as Zoro did a 180, actually going the right way this time. Fingers crossed he made it to the mansion. Maybe Nick should have told Luffy to hold his hand so he wouldn''t get lost. Like a kid in a mall, you know?

    Oh well, too late now.

    Looking around the decimated town, Nick frowned at counting several bodies belonging to the townsfolk. The worst was a mother clutching onto her child, both of them riddled with holes.

    His fists and jaw clenched at the sight. "Damn them!" he said aloud. "How did this happen?"

    He knew they belonged to Kuro''s crew by the goofy masks some of them wore, all black and all cat. That was definitely the mark of a Black Cat Pirate.

    Or a pervert.

    But more importantly, Nick wondered where they came from. When he and Zoro were heading to the shipyard earlier, there weren''t any ships he could see out at sea. And not just by the shipyards either. Since Zoro somehow made it to their own moored ships, twice, he knew they weren''t anywhere near there either.

    So how?

    That''s when he remembered. There were two slopes leading into town. In the original show, they made a big deal about which shore they were attacking from. That means, they had to have come from the other one. Both were about an equal distance from town, so it''s not like it would have mattered which one they chose.

    And who knows how many more may still be on the ship? Or if they had more ships. This could have been the first wave for all he knew. In that case¡­

    "I''d better go check," Nick said, forcing himself to his feet. "But first, let''s take care of this wound."

    *Line Break*

    Honey Queen watched as they shot harpoons into the side of the cliff, each one holding a length of rope. In between each length were planks of wood, forming a bridge, making it so she and the rest of the crew could disembark wherever they pleased without having to rely on one of the entrances to the island.

    Seeing the path was secure, she made her way across the bridge with a confident swagger. Her wide hips swayed side to side provocatively, hoping to entice her darling Kuro. But his eyes remained cold as ever.

    Boo Jack was enjoying the show, however, as were a multitude of her men behind her. But she had eyes for only one man. Once she reached the end of the bridge, she gave him a huge grin, sprinting towards him with arms wide open.

    "Kuro, baby! How''ve you been!?" she cheered, leaping at him and encompassing him in a hug. One that he didn''t return, having an exasperated look on his face as he expected her to do something like this.

    "Honey, a pleasure. But would you mind releasing me?" he asked, but anyone who heard his tone would know it wasn''t a question. There was a hard glint in his eyes as he stared her down, but all it did was make her pout.

    "Oh, boo. Why must you treat me so coldly, Kuro?" she asked, fake tears in her eyes. The pretend butler merely sighed with annoyance, grabbing her arms and pulling them off.

    "We do not have time for your silly games, woman. We have a schedule to keep, and we''re already behind," he told her, watching as more and more of her crew disembarked from the ship, forming a disorderly mob around the area.

    Not that he expected them to form nice neat lines. They were pirates after all, not Marines.

    Honey Queen sighed, "Honestly, must you treat me so coldly. But then again, that''s one of the things I love about you¡­" she swooned, giving him a lovey dovey look that sickened him and infuriated Boo Jack.

    But Kuro did not care for her affections. There was no way he could have a dalliance with a pirate once his plans had come to fruition. It simply wouldn''t be possible. But it seemed the simple minded woman had yet to reach the same conclusion.

    A noise coming from above him prevented him from responding to her claims of love and other such foolish emotions. All of them looked up, seeing some kind of flying object heading for them.This story originates from a different website. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there.

    "Ah, it seems Skunk One is here. What perfect timing," Honey Queen said, snapping out of her Kuro induced trance. The leader of the Black Cat Pirates frowned as the man came in for a landing. He really did not like the uncouth man, no matter how much he pretended to be a gentleman.

    His suit was propelled through the air by what amounted to the power of farts. No amount of posh acting could overcome that.

    "Honey Queen, my dear, it''s so good to see you," Skunk One said as he landed in front of her. He then grabbed one of her hands and placed a kiss on the back of it.

    "My, my, what a gentleman you are. You could learn a thing or two from him, Kuro," Honey Queen said, giving the man a teasing look. Kuro merely fixed his glasses, leveling a glare at them.

    "My IQ would have to take a significant hit to be able to learn anything from him. Now, if you''re quite done, shall we begin?" he questioned. Skunk One gave him the evil eye, as did Boo Jack, but Honey Queen had hearts in hers.

    He was just so cool!

    "Of course my darling Kuro. Whatever you say. Men, are you ready!?" she shouted to the throng of miscreants behind her. They all thrust their arms up, releasing loud cheers as they did so.

    "Well, looks like they''re quite eager to get started. After you," Honey Queen said to Kuro, who had a small smirk on his face.

    "Indeed. Follow me," he said. Honey Queen latched onto his arm, much to his frustration, as they began their trek towards the mansion.

    Soon, they came upon the gates, which were wide open. The guards were all standing around, blank eyed and drooling. Honey Queen made an impressed hum.

    "My, my, Jango is just as impressive as always," she commented, seeing the glassy eyed stare of the guards. It was kind of creepy how he could do something like this, all without a Devil Fruit. Good thing he was an idiot.

    "Perhaps. However, it doesn''t appear as if he was able to complete his job," Kuro said, anger seeping into his tone. Honey followed his gaze and saw what had her pudding pop so frustrated. The doors to the mansion were shut tight.

    "Oh dear. Well that just won''t do. Boo Jack, be a dear and open those doors for me, would you?" she asked, fluttering her eyes at him.

    "Right away my Queen," he simped. But before he could take a step, a figure appeared from around the corner. He was battered and bruised, not to mention burnt, missing an ear and part of his lower lip, making his way toward them with a limp.

    "Oh my, is that Jango?" Honey Queen asked in shock. "What happened to him?"

    Kuro frowned as his second mate hobbled over to them. He stopped in front of them, swaying on his feet, barely able to stand. "Well, don''t keep me in suspense. Regale us with our tale of failure," Kuro demanded.

    "Sorry, Captain. They were better defended than we thought," he slurred, his eyes unfocused. Kuro''s own gained a twitch as he stared at the bumbling oaf in front of them.

    "Are you telling me a couple of children did this to you? Is your incompetence really so great? Perhaps I misplaced my faith in you."

    "You don''t understand Captain! They summoned swarms of demons and booby trapped the entire house! They even had a monster in the basement!" Jango shouted, but his excuses fell on deaf ears.

    "I don''t want to hear it. For now, just stand there and wait for us to grab the girl. Afterwards, I''ll have you do the one thing you''re good at and hypnotize her. Understood?"

    "...Yes Captain," Jango ground out. Kuro nodded in satisfaction, turning to look at the mansion with a critical eye.

    "You, Skunk One. I have a plan for you," Kuro said after a moment. This caught the other man''s attention, giving him a curious look.

    "Once the fat one breaks down the door, I want you to fly to the third story and kidnap Kaya from her room, understood?" he asked, staring at him from the corner of his eye. But his description of a certain someone made that certain someone rather angry.

    "Hey, who the hell are you calling fat!? Who do you think you are!?" shouted Boo Jack. Kuro didn''t answer right away, his head slumped down, casting his eyes in shadows.

    "Who am I, you ask? Well, let me tell you¡­" he started, only to everyone''s shock, he disappeared, leaving only a small cloud of dust in his wake. But that didn''t last long, as they saw him appear behind Boo Jack, a knife held to his throat.

    "I''m the man who will kill you if you ever speak to me like that again. Do you understand?" Kuro asked in a deceptively calm voice. Boo Jack felt the knife dig into his flesh, and nodded as quickly as he could, sweat dripping down his brow in fear.

    "Good," Kuro said, removing the knife from the portly man''s throat and walking some ways away. Boo Jack fell to his knees, gasping for air, his whole body shaking like a leaf. The rest of their crew had similar looks of fear on their faces, fully realizing just how dangerous of a man he was.

    The only one not afraid was Honey Queen, who was squirming in place, rubbing her thighs together at the show of dominance she just witnessed.

    "The rest of you, surround the estate. Do not let a single person escape. Do I make myself clear?" he asked, getting frightened confirmations from the terrified group.

    "Excellent. Then let us begin."

    Nami and Akisu stood in front of the window looking out at the front yard. Their eyes were wide as they watched the butler, Klahadore, walk up with dozens of other men. And from her experience, she was certain they were pirates.

    "W-what''s going on?" Akisu asked with fear, sweat dripping down his brow. They just dealt with one pirate, and now there were a bunch more of them. How was that fair!?

    "I''ll tell you what. That skeevy butler is a traitor. I''ll bet he''s been working for the pirates this whole time," Nami growled out. Akisu looked at her in disbelief, but it was hard to argue with her hypothesis when the proof was staring them in the face.

    "So what do we do?" he asked, voice tinged with fear. Nami looked down at him, and seeing his fearful face, softened her own as she responded. "We need to get Kaya and get out of here. There''s no way we can take them all on without Luffy and the others. It''s our only option."

    Akisu looked down at that, and she could see the frustration in his eyes. Not that she could blame him. She didn''t particularly like the thought of running away either. But if they could escape and find the others, they still had a chance to turn this around.

    "I know it sucks, but protecting Kaya is our top priority," she told him. He looked back up at her, his eyes shifting from aggravated to determined. He gave her a firm nod, "Right. Kaya comes first."

    She smiled at him and ruffled his hat, making him try and swat her hand away. She looked back out of the window, noticing a familiar figure limping towards the assembled group.

    "What did Usopp do to him?" she asked in disbelief, seeing his injured and burnt form. Akisu looked out as well, eyes wide at the sight of the half dead man.

    "Looks like he was caught in that explosion we heard," he said. Nami hummed in agreement, watching as the maimed man was seemingly chastised by the butler. But then something happened that made her eyes shrink in fear.

    Klahadore vanished. Just disappeared from sight. It was made all the more frightening by the fact that she was staring right at him and had no idea where he went. But that question was answered as soon as it was asked, as he reappeared behind the fat one, knife at his throat.

    "H-how did he do that?" Aksiu asked. Nami was wondering the same thing. Her best guess was some kind of Devil Fruit. When she saw their attention return to the mansion, she knew it was time to go.

    "Come on, we need to get to Kaya," she said. Akisu nodded in agreement, and the pair of them raced towards the stairs as fast as they could. Well, as fast as Akisu could, with Nami matching her speed to his.

    But just as they reached the first step, the doorway exploded inwards, showering the front entrance with debris. Nami and Akisu let out panicked yells as the sudden demolition knocked them from their feet.

    Looking back, they stared, mouths agape at the destruction. But their attention was drawn to something moving near the wall. Turning their gazes towards it, they saw the fat man from outside, casually standing up, chunks of wood falling from his form.

    Once he was standing erect, he started to look around the room, before he spotted the two of them. He gave them a big, wide grin. "Well, look what we have here. It''s pretty late, you know. Shouldn''t you be in bed?" he asked, staring at Akisu. But when his eyes landed on Nami, he had a completely different reaction.

    "Whoa! What a babe! What is someone like you doing here?" he asked, his tongue rolling out of his mouth and drool piling up beneath him.

    Nami recoiled, giving the man a look of disgust. As proud as she was of her looks, they attracted the worst of people sometimes. She thought Nick would be the same with how he stared at her chest the first time they met. And every time after that, to be honest. But he turned out alright.

    She doubted the same for the pig in front of her. "None of your business you creep! Now buzz off!" she shouted, grabbing Akisu''s hand and making a beeline up the stairs. Her actions only made him grin even harder.

    "Aw, come on, don''t be like that. If you play nice, I might consider making you my pet," he said, leering at her plump backside as she sprinted away. That little black dress she was wearing doing its job and showing off every curve in exquisite detail.

    "Ugh, gross," Nami muttered, holding in her vomit. The two of them reached the top, when a massive figure appeared next to them. With a startled yelp, she came to a stop, staring at the pig face man with revulsion as he licked his lips advancing on her.

    "Don''t worry Nami! I''ll protect you!" Akisu shouted, standing in front of her, holding out his slingshot, ready to fire.

    "Akisu!" Nami shouted in surprise.

    Boo Jack stopped his advance, sneering down at the kid who was ruining his fun. "Beat it you little shit. Us grownups are having a conversation."

    "Not a chance! Nami''s my friend, and I won''t let you touch her!" he shouted, aiming right for the other man''s face. Nami was touched by the concern he was showing her, but she was more afraid for his safety. She sincerely doubted anything he could fire at him would do much damage.

    "Have it your way, brat. Just don''t say I didn''t warn you," he said, stepping towards the kid.

    "Take this! Usopp Special: Devil''s Breath!" Akisu shouted. He let go of the pouch, sending a bright red ball towards the lumbering man. But just as it neared his face, he swung his arm at it, breaking the ball and releasing a crimson powder into the air.

    "Nice try brat! But something like that won''t-" Boo Jack yelled. But he stopped short when his eyes were met with a burning sensation. Then his nose. Then his throat. Hell, even his ears felt like they were melting off.

    "Ah! What did you do to me!?" he screamed in pain. His hands went to his face, trying to wipe the powder off and ease the pain. But it only seemed to make it worse. Akisu had a big grin on his face at seeing how effective the attack was.

    "How do you like it? That ball contained several extremely spicy peppers that we dried out and turned into powder. No one can escape the pain it causes," Akisu explained.

    Nami was surprised, once again, by just how effective Usopp''s seemingly childish antics were. Maybe she should stop underestimating him?

    But seeing as he was incapacitated, she decided she should pull her own weight. "Good job, kid. Now it''s my turn!" she shouted, pulling out her three piece staff, putting it together in one swift motion, before slamming it into the pig-like man''s face. Where she kept that thing in the tiny black dress she wore was a mystery.

    "Take that!" Nami yelled as Boo Jack went flying over the railing. Akisu cheered, "Way to go big sis!" She turned to face him, giving him a victory sign with a big grin.

    Kuro and Honey Queen entered the house, watching as Boo Jack slammed into the floor and bounced like a rubber ball, until coming to a stop right in front of them. They peered down at him, frowning in disappointment.

    "Don''t tell me these children got the best of you as well?" Kuro asked condescendingly. Boo Jack opened his bloodshot eyes to glare at the other man. "Just you wait. I''ll teach them a lesson," he proclaimed.

    "Don''t bother. This situation requires a more delicate touch. You just sit there and watch," Honey Queen said, sauntering towards the pair with a smirk on her face. This was her chance to show off in front of Kuro, and all she needed to do was take care of a couple of brats.

    Easy.

    Nami and Akisu, who were watching the scantily clad woman make her way towards them, decided it was time to go. "Come on," Nami said, grabbing the young boy''s hand and attempting to run.

    "Oh, you think you can escape? How adorable," Honey Queen cooed, her body changing shape. Her entire form seemed to melt, turning into a dark yellow, viscous liquid, which shot out towards the two of them.

    Nami skidded to a halt seeing a strange liquid substance appear in front of her. She and Akisu watched with fear as the blob of whatever it was rose up, transforming into the woman from down below.

    "W-what the hell are you?" Nami asked, taking a step back. Honey Queen, who had fully reformed herself at this point, licked her lips while giving the other woman a smirk.

    "Me? I ate the Honey-Honey fruit, making me a honey human," she said, holding out an arm and letting a drop of what was apparently honey fall to the floor.

    "Seriously? You ate a Devil Fruit?" Nami asked, looking for a way to escape. Seeing this, the aptly named Honey Queen swung her hand towards the hallways, a massive wave of viscous liquid shooting out, coating the whole hallway and forming a wall of honey.

    "Honey Trap!" she yelled, as the walls of honey hardened, preventing any hope of Nami and Akisu escaping.

    "Damn it!" yelled Nami, staring at their only means of escape being blocked off. "What''s your problem you bitch!? Just let us go!"

    A vein in Honey Queens temple pulsed angrily at that. "A bitch am I? Perhaps I should teach you some manners?" she said, launched a new wave of sticky honey at the ginger haired woman.

    Four sticky globs hit her, one on each of her arms and legs, lining her to the honey wall behind her.

    "Ah!" she screamed in pain and fear.

    "Big sis!" yelled Akisu as he ran up to her. He tried to remove the offending substance, but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn''t get it to budge.

    "Isn''t that cute? Is this your knight in shining armor?" Honey Queen mocked. Nami glared at the woman, trying her best not to show how afraid she is.

    "Let her go, or else!" Akisu shouted, turning to face the woman, pointing his slingshot at her. But Honey Queen wasn''t afraid in the least, pointing her index finger at him.

    "Honey Shot."

    A small, round ball of honey flew from her finger, right at the young boy, hitting his weapon and coating it in the sticky fluid, making it effectively useless. Akisu dropped the weapon, but he refused to give up, charging at the woman with every ounce of courage he possessed.

    "Wait, don''t do it!" Nami shouted, but her cries fell on deaf ears. Honey Queen smirked as the kid neared, backhanding him across the face, sending him sprawling across the floor with a cry of pain.

    "How could you!? He''s just a kid!" Nami shouted, eyes filled with rage. But Honey Queen seemed unperturbed by her outburst, sashaying her way towards the bound girl.

    "What was I supposed to do? Let him hit me? I don''t think so," she mocked, stopping in front of Nami, staring her directly in the eyes. But then her gaze traveled downward, giving a hum of appreciation as she did so.

    "You know, you have quite the figure. I think you''d make a fantastic second wife for my brother," she said. Nami''s eyes widened in horror, "The pig!?"

    That made Honey Queen stop for a moment before shuddering. "No, not him. Even I''m not that cruel. I''m talking about the Bear King of course," she said, only alleviating a small portion of Nami''s concerns.

    She didn''t want to be forced to marry anyone, thank you very much!

    But wasn''t that the name of the creep trying to force Kaya into marrying him? And he thought he deserved her hand as well? As if! Whoever this asshole was, she doubted he was worth one bride, let alone two!

    "Gee, what a great offer, but I''m afraid I''m going to have to decline," Nami said, voice dripping with sarcasm.

    "I''m afraid your compliance isn''t a factor. But tell you what, if second wife isn''t good enough for you, how about concubine?" she asked with a laugh. Nami growled and sincerely wished she could punch this woman in the face.

    "I won''t let you take either of them," said a voice behind Honey Queen. The two of them looked and saw Akisu, forcing himself to his feet, cheek bright red and dripping a bit of blood.

    "Akisu!" Nami shouted happily, glad that he was alright. But she very much wished he used this opportunity to run away.

    "That hair," muttered Honey Queen, getting a confused look from Nami. The blonde haired woman was staring at the little boy as if in a trance. Looking at him, she saw his hair for the first time, his hat having fallen off when he was struck.

    It was dark, almost black, and swirled like an ice cream cone.

    "That means¡­ you''re from the island," Honey Queen continued to mutter. But before she could do anything, a loud scream pierced through the silence. The voice was very familiar to two of them.

    It was Kaya.

 Chapter 31

    Usopp stared at the scene in front of him with confusion and worry. "What the hell happened here?" he asked himself, kneeling down. His hand brushed across the side of one of Kaya''s guard dogs, sighing in relief as its chest rose and fell, signifying it was alive.

    Looking around the room he spotted their food bows only half eaten. Strange, as he''s never known them to leave any amount of food behind. One of their favorite pastimes was cleaning the kitchen floors of any and all scraps that happened to fall. Didn''t matter if they''d just eaten either, the little gluttons were always ready and willing to eat more.

    They especially loved it when Kaya made food, as she always made sure to "accidentally" spill some for them. He remembers coming over once and seeing her in a lovely yellow sundress and wearing a dirty white apron mixing something in a bowl. The dogs were all looking at her expectantly and she casually knocked over some of the batter. The dogs happily ran over and began to clean up the mess.

    "Don''t tell Merry or Klahadore, ok? This will be our little secret," she told them, while holding her index finger to her lips. Usopp would never forget her smiling, giggling face as the dogs jumped up and started licking her, barking happily with their tails wagging a million miles an hour.

    Those mutts really adored her. Just another one of her charms.

    That means something must be wrong with their food. If he had to guess, someone drugged it, put them to sleep. But who? Practically everyone had access to the dogs'' food, but he couldn''t imagine someone drugging them. Maybe there was a new hire he didn''t know about, though that seemed unlikely with everything that''s been going on.

    Which would suggest they had a traitor. But who?

    Just as he was beginning to think about this, a loud, piercing scream distracted him from his thoughts. The terrified, heartbroken sound belonged to someone he cared for very dearly.

    "Kaya!" he yelled, sprinting towards her room as fast as he could. If they did anything to her, there would be hell to pay!

    It didn''t take him long to arrive at her door, having run faster than he ever had in his entire life. But when he tried to open it, he found it to be locked. Growling in frustration, he pounded against the thick, wooden door.

    "Kaya, are you ok!? Speak to me!"

    "Usopp, is that you!?" shouted a familiar voice from inside, making him sag in relief. She was alive, at any rate, but something had still caused her to scream.

    "Yeah, it''s me! Is everything ok? I heard you scream," he said.

    "No, it''s Merry! He''s been shot, and I-ah!"

    "Kaya! What happened!" he shouted, once more pounding on the door. When no answer came, he grit his teeth in anger. He had to get in that room, no matter what.

    Stepping away from the door, he pulled out a round ball from his satchel, this one pure black. He ended it into his slingshot and aimed at the door handle, right where the lock would be.

    "Special Attack: Exploding Star!"

    The projectile flew from the slingshot and struck true, causing the door to explode. Usopp rushed forward, pushing what remained of the door to the side and stepping inside the room.

    "Kaya, where are you!?" he shouted, waving smoke and dust out of his face. When it did clear enough, he saw the girl of his dreams, sometimes literally, thrown over another man''s shoulder like a sack of potatoes.

    "Usopp¡­" she begged, reaching out for him, eyes filled with hope, before she passed out, her arm falling limp to the side.

    "Kaya! Let her go right now, or else!" Usopp threatened, pointing his slingshot at the man dressed like a skunk. But rather than be intimidated, the kidnaper just smirked at him, completely unconcerned.

    "Ah, and the dashing young hero makes his appearance. I applaud your bravery, young man. But I''m afraid I shan''t be returning the young maiden to your care. You see, we can''t have a wedding without the bride, now can we?" he asked, tone full of mockery as he grinned at Usopp.

    "You bastard!" yelled the long nosed sniper, raising his weapon to aim directly at Skunk One''s face.

    "Ah ah ah, I wouldn''t do that if I were you. You wouldn''t want to hit the poor young lady, now would you?" he asked condescendingly, making Usopp hesitate. Skunk One sneered at the young man before jumping out the window, making Usopp panic.

    "Kaya!" he shouted, running towards the window. When he got there, he saw the strangely dressed man flying through the sky heading towards the front entrance. He was about to leap out of the window when a wet cough distracted him. Turning around, he saw the bleeding form of Merry lying against the wall.

    "Oh crap. Merry!" Usopp yelled, rushing towards him. He knelt down beside him,

    panicking. "What do I do, what do I do, what do I do?" he repeated, seeing the amount of blood leaking from the hole in his side.

    "Usopp, I''m so glad to see you unharmed. But Miss Kaya, I couldn''t¡­ I couldn''t protect her. I''m such a failure," he belittled himself, tears of frustration leaking from his eyes.

    "Don''t say that. Out of everyone, you''ve been there for Kaya the most." The long nosed man said, grabbing a piece of cloth and pressing against the wound.

    "And she still needs you, so you''re not allowed to die, do you hear me?" Usopp said firmly. Merry chuckled, holding the cloth to his wound with one hand and drying his tears with the other.

    "Loud and clear. I would be remiss in my duties if I departed without the Lady''s express permission after all."

    "Good, now get some rest. I''m going to go and save her," Usopp claimed with barely a waiver in his voice.

    "Good luck Usopp. Bring our girl home," Merry said with a cough.

    Giving the man a nod, Usopp stood up and made his way to the window, figuring it to be the fastest way. And that''s when he noticed the men outside of the house. Dozens of rough looking men patrolled the area carrying torches, looking for anyone who thought they could escape.

    "You''ve got to be kidding me," Usopp mumbled, wondering what he should do. Did he go back and run through the mansion? No, that would take too much time. And who knows if there were people inside as well, so it probably wouldn''t save him any time regardless.

    So he would just have to go through the ones outside then. Staring at his shaking hand, he thought of the woman he loved, the danger she was in, and the shaking stopped.

    "There''s no time to be scared, Usopp. Kaya needs you," he said to himself, eyes gaining a determined glint. He was still afraid, but that fear wouldn''t stop him. He would save Kaya no matter what.

    He placed his foot against the windowsill, waiting until no one was looking towards the tree and jumped, landing on a thick branch, the same one he told Kaya stories from. He was sure glad he didn''t have time to booby trap it.

    "Hey, did you hear something?" asked one of the guys below. Usopp immediately hid deeper into the foliage of the tree, making sure he couldn''t be spotted. Luckily it was dark out, so the chances of him being spotted were pretty slim.

    He was the best at hide and seek after all. As a coward, he knew the best ways to hide. Coincidentally, it was also a valuable skill for a sniper.

    The goons below started looking around, but they couldn''t see anything. Usopp knew it was now or never, he wouldn''t get a better chance than this. Grabbing a few balls from his satchel, for rapid firing, he loaded one in his slingshot, aiming it at the guy closest to him.

    "This is for Kaya," Usopp muttered, before releasing his shot. The ball flew true, hitting the guy in the temple, dropping him like a bag of rocks. A few of the others turned to see what the noise was, barely having time to notice the guy on the ground before they too were struck in the head, rendering them unconscious.

    "What''s going on!? What happened to them!?" someone shouted in a panic. They were frantically looking around now, guns and swords raised threateningly. But for once, Usopp didn''t feel threatened.

    For once, he was the predator, and they were his prey. But there were still so many, and he didn''t have time for a lengthy hunt. That''s when he got an idea.

    He began to pick off the ones farthest out, the ones along the edge of the perimeter. Seeing this, the men below began to instinctually bunch up, the primal part of their psyche telling them there was safety in numbers. But that was exactly what Usopp wanted.

    Another man fell to the ground, unconscious or dead, nobody knew which. The guys closest to him backed away, meeting the remaining dozen or so men in the center. They looked about the yard, wide eyed and frightened, but they couldn''t find whoever was responsible.

    "You coward! Come out and fight us fair and square!" shouted one guy with terror in his voice.

    "If you insist," called out Usopp, revealing himself in the tree. The group turned to see who it was, and what they saw certainly wasn''t what they were expecting.

    "What, it''s just some kid!?" shouted one in disbelief, as Usopp stared at them with cold eyes.

    "Somebody shoot him!" yelled another. But when nobody did, he turned to his remaining pirate buddies, only to see each of them were carrying cutlasses, not guns.

    "Sorry, but that''s not happening," Usopp claimed. He made sure to take out the ones with guns first. After all, the guys with swords weren''t much of a threat to him at the moment. Maybe if he was on the floor, but since he had the high ground, well¡­

    They were just fish in a barrel.

    Usopp held up his hand, showing the group a pair of pitch black metal balls. "You dared come to my home, hurt my friends, burn down the village, and kidnapped the woman I love. I''ll make sure you regret each and every one of those decisions."

    He then loaded them both into the pouch of the slingshot, aiming it right for the pirates he herded into a group.

    "Take this! Special Attack: Twin Exploding Stars!"

    The pair of bombs sailed towards the group, who let out shrieks of panic, before they were caught in a massive explosion. Bodies and limbs went flying all over the place, the grass at the center of the explosion catching fire.

    Usopp watched this all with an impassive face. He didn''t relish what he did, but he would do what needed to be done to protect the people he loved.

    "Alright, now to go save Kaya. I hope the others are alright¡­" he muttered as he climbed down the tree as fast as he could, practically leaping to the ground. He landed, knees bent, before darting off towards the front of the house in the same direction he saw the other man fly off.

    But when he rounded the corner and saw the amount of people there, he quickly dove back behind the building. He gazed out at the gathered pirates with a gulp. There were just so many. There was no way he could take them all on.

    But that''s when he saw something that caused both his eyes to widen in disbelief. "W-what''s going on?" he stuttered, watching as the butler casually stood outside of the house.

    Then, stepping through the broken doorway was a busty, blonde woman and a large, pig-like man behind her. But that wasn''t the worrying part. No, that was for who the fat guy was carrying.

    Nami was slung over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes, her body bound by some kind of weird dark, yellow substance. Which also just so happened to be gagging her at the moment, and judging by the look in her eyes and the way she was squirming, he had to doubt she was screaming her head off at the moment, they just couldn''t hear it.

    While he was worried for her, it was the second person he saw the fat guy carrying, this one under his other arm, that infuriated him. It was Akisu, looking worse for wear.

    "Bastard. What the hell does he think he''s doing to my little brother," Usopp growled out. But as much as he wanted to charge in guns blazing, or in his case, slingshot blazing, he would probably get killed. And if that happened, there would be no one to save them. So for now he would bide his time and wait for the right moment to strike.

    "Good job Honey Queen. I see there''s at least someone I can rely on," said Kuro while fixing his glasses. Hearing his compliment sent the woman into a tizzy as she leapt at him, latching onto his arm again.

    "Oh Kuro, darling, you sure know how to sweet talk a girl," she said, fluttering her eyelashes at him. His hand twitched, and he had to control the urge to kill the woman. Doing so would send him into an all out war with her boss, and that was something he would like to avoid.

    Usopp, who was listening, was confused. "Kuro? But I thought his name was Klahadore. And why does it sound so familiar?" he thought, as he continued to observe them.

    "Now, where is Skunk One? He should have retrieved Kaya by now," Kuro stated, gazing out at the crowd. The assembled pirates parted, and the man named Skunk One walked past them, tossing the sickly girl onto the floor.

    "No need to fret, I retrieved her without issue. But I''m sorry to say your colleague insisted on barring my path and had to be¡­ taken care of," Skunk One claimed with a grin.

    "I see no issue with that. Saves me the trouble," he said, walking towards the girl who was just now coming to. She pushed herself up, shaking the cobwebs from her head before looking at her surroundings.

    Her eyes widened, and she let out a yell. "W-who are you!? Where am I?"

    "Now, now, there''s no need to fret Miss. You''re in good hands I assure you," Kuro said in a fake calming voice. Kaya turned to face him, her expression morphing into one of relief.

    "Klahadore, it''s you! I''m so glad you''re safe. But, what''s going on?" she asked, nervous eyes glancing at the pirates around her.

    "Don''t worry about them. They''re merely here to escort you to your husband to be," Kuro sneered, adjusting his glasses once more.

    Kaya''s face morphed into one of confusion and disbelief. He didn''t just say what she thought he did, did he? "I-I don''t understand," she said, looking at her butler, friend, and mentor with hope in her eyes. Hope that this was all some kind of joke.

    Kuro sighed and knelt down beside her. Kaya expected to see the same kind eyes she''s always seen staring back at her. But what she got was anything but kindness. They were eyes of cruelty and derision, gazing at her with nothing but contempt.

    "Then let me make it perfectly clear," he said, grabbing her by her hair and pulling her towards him. Kaya screamed in pain, tearful eyes looking at him with fear for the first time in her life. "Tomorrow, you will marry the Bear King and sign away your company to me. Afterwards, I don''t really care what happens to you. Understand?"

    He tossed her back to the ground, Kaya yelping as she hit the dirt hard. She looked back at him, tears streaming down her face. "I don''t understand¡­ How could you do this? I thought we were friends?"

    "Friends? Is that what you believed? Let me tell you a little secret then, friend. Everyday spent under your service was pure agony. Having to listen to your sniveling voice daily was nothing but torture. It took all of my self restraint not to kill you every time I heard it," Kuro said, glaring at her with hateful eyes. Hearing this, all Kaya could do was cry.

    "Klahadore¡­"

    "That one, right there! That''s the sound that made my blood boil every time I heard it!" he shouted, losing his cool. The pirates surrounding them, who had been enjoying the show, backed away, fearful of the madness they saw in his eyes.

    Usopp watched the whole thing while shaking in rage. His fist clenched so tightly around his slingshot it was a miracle it hadn''t snapped in two. He swore, then and there, to make that traitorous butler pay.

    Nami, who had been listening to the whole thing, glared at the cruel man with everything she had. "Luffy, Nick, where are you?" she said in her mind, hoping they would make a miraculous appearance.

    And to her surprise, one of them actually did.

    "You really are a piece of shit, aren''t you?" questioned a deep voice. Kuro looked up only for his face to be met with a fist. He went soaring back, hitting the ground hard before rolling to a stop.

    Everyone watched as the hand that hit him seemed to retract, being attached to an impossible long arm. Once it returned to its owner, they finally saw who it was they were dealing with.

    A green haired man with three swords standing there next to a scrawny looking kid wearing a straw hat.

    "You¡­" Kuro said through grit teeth, holding onto his jaw in pain. Honey Quen was kneeling beside him, worry and anger etched onto her beautiful face.If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, it''s taken without the author''s consent. Report it.

    "So the heroes have finally arrived, have they?" Kuro said, standing up and staring at them with a glare.

    "We''re not heroes, we''re pirates. And we''re here to kick your ass, butler guy," Luffy said, a furious look in his eyes. One thing he could never forgive was someone hurting his friends.

    He looked and saw Kaya on the ground, tears streaming down her cheeks, staring at him with hope and despair warring for dominance over her face. Nami was tied up with something and gagged, being held hostage by some big guy who looked like a pig, eyes telling him that he was late. And Akisu¡­ bit the pig guy''s hand.

    "Yeowch!" he shouted, dropping him. He ran up to Kaya before kneeling down next to her. "Kaya, are you ok?" he asked, concern written all over his face.

    "Oh Akisu, I''m fine. But you need to get out of here. It''s too dangerous for you," she told him, gratitude filling her being at his concern for her. But she couldn''t bear the thought of something happening to the sweet little boy because of her.

    "I''m not leaving you!" he shouted back. Zoro gave a smirk at hearing the kid''s courage. "Well I''ll be damned. His big brother could learn a thing or two from him," he said, unknowing that Usopp could hear every word he said, sending him spiraling into depression.

    Skunk One looked at the boy, or more specifically, his hair. "Wait a moment¡­ Could he be¡­"

    "So you''ve noticed. I should have known it wouldn''t escape you," Honey Queen said, coming to stand next to him. He gave her a curious look, which she returned with a smirk.

    "This might be the breakthrough we''ve been looking for. Be a dear and go to his house. See if he''s been hiding anything. My efforts of persuasion have been less than successful," she mentioned, getting Skunk One to grin.

    "That''s because your methods of persuasion require one to have gone through puberty," he commented, getting a chuckle out of her, "Too true."

    "But you know the whole town is on fire. I doubt his home was spared," he said.

    "According to my darling, he lives on the outskirts of the village, in the opposite direction of where his men made landfall, so there''s a chance it escaped the inferno," Honey Queen stated.

    "Oh, I see. Then I shall leave posthaste," he exclaimed, voice tinged with excitement. This could be the big break they''ve been looking for. If the boy really did have it, that would make the perfect wedding gift.

    Skunk One flew off, making Honey Queen cringe at the smell. While having the ability to fly was certainly useful, she wished he would do so in a more savory manner.

    She turned her attention back towards the growing escalation, seeing that the hunky swordsman had drawn two of his swords, and the straw hat wearing one raised his fists. Looks like things were about to get interesting.

    "I''ve had enough of this farce. Kill them, and be swift about it," Kuro ordered, much to the joy of the pirates, who let out cheers before charging towards Zoro and Luffy.

    "Now then, what to do with you," Kuro stated, walking up to Akisu and Kaya, glaring down at them. Akisu got in a defensive stance, ready to defend Kaya even if he was scared out of his mind.

    "I-I won''t let you lay one more finger on her!" he shouted, much to Kuro''s amusement. Then before Akisu could blink, the fake butler was in front of him, leg raised back before delivering a devastating kick to the young boy''s torso.

    "Akisu, no!" Kaya shouted. She made to head towards him, but a hand gripping her hair prevented her from doing so. She let out a scream of pain as she was forcefully pulled backwards.

    "And where do you think you''re going?" Kuro asked with a glare. Kaya looked back at him with tearful, yet defiant eyes. But before Kuro could belittle her anymore, a sharp pain in his hand forced him to let go.

    "Ah! What was that!?" he shouted, cradling his injured hand. It wasn''t broken, thankfully, but it would still reduce his effectiveness by a noticeable margin, which was simply unacceptable.

    He turned to look behind him, and his eyes narrowed in fury, "You¡­"

    "Keep your filthy hands off of her you damn, dirty pirate!" Usopp shouted. He was standing just past the corner, knees clicking together like they were a metronome going 10 times its normal speed.

    "Usopp!" Kaya yelled in joy.

    Kuro''s eyes returned to a more normal, sardonic look as he gazed at the young man in front of him. "Well, I can honestly say I''m impressed. I didn''t think you''d have the courage to face me directly. What a surprise," Kuro mocked, making Usopp grit his teeth in anger.

    "All these years, you''ve mocked me for having a pirate as a father, all the while you''ve been one yourself!?" Usopp yelled, getting a smirk from Kuro.

    "Yes, the irony is not lost on me. But while you wished to become like your detestable father, my ambition was to leave such a life behind me," he said, fixing his glasses. His words caught Luffy''s attention, even as he bashed two guys'' skulls together.

    "And to do that you have to hurt Kaya!? Why!?" Usopp yelled.

    "Why, for her money of course. I have no intention of living in squalor, nor do I intend to bow my head to such an insufferable brat any longer. Once this is over, I''ll finally have the freedom I deserve, with all the riches I could ever ask for. I see no better way to retire from a life of piracy than that."

    Usopp continued to glare hatefully at the man, while Honey Queen sent him looks of admiration, which morphed into shock, "Look out! Honey Wall!" she shouted, forming a barrier of hardened honey just in time to block a man''s body from ramming into Kuro''s.

    The former butler turned around in surprise, and saw Luffy standing there with his eyes shadowed by his hat. "Was that you? Just who do you think you are?"

    "I''m Luffy¡­" he started to say, placing his hand on his hat.

    "The man who will become¡­" his head snapped up and he leveled Kuro with a glare of his own.

    "King of the Pirates!"

    Everything on the courtyard came to a stop. Not a single word was spoken, the only noise that could be heard was the wind blowing past them.

    "Pfft¡­"

    That is, until one asshole started to make a spectacle. Once that happened, it didn''t take long for the others to join in.

    "You? King of the Pirates? You must be joking?"

    "He''s just a pipsqueak!"

    "What a dumbass!"

    Luffy didn''t respond to their taunts. He simply stood there, eyes never leaving Kuro''s, uncaring of their taunts and jeers.

    "Do you have any idea the nonsense you''re spouting right now, boy?" Kuro asked. He didn''t join in on the mockery, simply staring right back at the young man.

    "Why should I care what a coward like you has to say? Someone like you, who threw away his pride, has no right to lecture me. The pirate flag is for life. It''s not something you can just decide to leave behind," Luffy stated, making the area go quiet once again.

    Zoro gave a smirk at the gobsmacked pirates. Luffy may have been a moron about 99% of the time, but that last 1% sure made an impression.

    "Heh, well put Captain," he said with a smirk.

    Usopp was looking at the rubber man with pure admiration. That speech was so cool! It reignited his passion and desire to head to sea himself.

    Nami and Kaya wore similar expressions of awe, though it was hard to tell with Nami, what with her being gagged and all, but her eyes said everything.

    Kuro however, was not so impressed by Luffy''s little speech. In fact, he looked down right livid, the veins in his forehead pulsing angrily, like they could burst open any second.

    "You little brat! I''ll make sure to kill you nice and slow," Kuro ground out.

    "Go ahead and try. I''ll never lose to a fake pirate like you," Luffy said, putting his hands up.

    "As you wish," Kuro growled, pulling out a pair of gloves from¡­ somewhere. But before he could put them on, a hand on his forearm prevented him from doing so.

    "Now, now, Kuro dear, there''s no need to get so worked up. A naive fool like him is no match for someone like you. He''s just trying to rile you up. Let them handle it," she said, indicating the pirate minions all around them.

    Kuro glared at her and for a moment, it looked like he was about to attack her. But he managed to collect himself just in time. Not like it would have done him any good anyway with her Logia powers.

    The fake butler adjusted his ruffled sleeves with a huff, swiping his hand across his hair to fix it. "I suppose you are right, Honey. Best let riffraff deal with other riffraff."

    "Exactly. Now, I think we have everything we need, don''t we? Perhaps it''s time to make our departure?" she suggested. Kuro seemed to think it over, before smirking at the Strawhats.

    "Yes, I believe you are correct," he said, reaching down and pulling Kaya to her feet by her hair, making her scream out again.

    "Kaya! Let her go, you bastard!" Usopp yelled, aiming his slingshot at him once again. But Kuro merely gave him a cocky grin before placing Kaya in harm''s way, making Usopp hesitate.

    "Well, what are you waiting for? Weren''t you going to shoot me?" he asked condescendingly.

    "Usopp¡­" Kaya cried, making him shake in anger.

    "Dirty bastard," Zoro said, watching the scene.

    Honey Queen smiled, watching the man of her dreams express his ruthless side. "Well this has been fun, but it''s time for us to take our leave. But don''t worry, our friends here will stay and keep you company," she said, making all the pirates around her chuckle, giving them eager smirks.

    "Fine by me. Once we''re done with them, you''re next," Zoro told them, pulling out his third sword and placing it on his mouth.

    "Oh I think you''ll be much too busy for that," she told him with a smile. One that said she knew something he didn''t. He found it extremely irritating.

    "You really think these weaklings will hold us back for long? You really are just a dumb bimbo, aren''t you?" Zoro asked with a smirk. Honey Queen gained a tick mark, casting a baleful look the swordsman''s direction.

    "We''ll see who the bimbo is after all these men stick their swords in you," she said, before turning to look at Boo Jack. "Do it," she commanded.

    He gave an eager look, pulling out a flare gun and shooting it into the sky. The others watched this with concern. Well, Nami and Usopp did, while Luffy looked curious and Zoro looked bored.

    "W-what now!?" Usopp yelled in fright.

    His question was answered when several dozens of pirates began entering the courtyard. "Where did they all come from!?" Usopp shouted. That''s when he remembered the couple of dozens of pirates he just defeated. There must have been more surrounding the house.

    "Looks like the gang''s all here," she said with a coy smirk. "Now we really must be going. Boys, be good and play with them, will you?"

    "You got it Honey Queen!" shouted some random simp.

    "Get ''em!" shouted another.

    Luffy and Zoro once more began fighting. Luffy punched one guy into the air before stretching his arm out to grab him and slam him into the ground. Zoro grinned as he began to weave in and out of the group, slashing and stabbing anyone who got too close.

    And it wasn''t just them, Usopp began firing at anyone he could, taking out a guy pointing a gun at Zoro. It was clear that they wouldn''t be able to hold them off for long.

    "Now then, let us be off," Kuo said, adjusting his glasses with the arm that wasn''t clutching a woman''s hair.

    "No! You can''t make me!" Kaya shouted, struggling against him. And she wasn''t the only one, as Nami did her best to make Boo Jack''s life utterly miserable.

    "Enough, I don''t have time for these shenanigans! Jango!" Kuro ordered. The hypnotist sprung into action. Well, more like, waddled with all his injuries. Kaya and Nami were forced to look towards him as he pulled out a metal ring on a string.

    "Now, look into the pendulum as it swings. Back and forth, back and forth. There is nothing but the ring and my voice. Back and forth, back and forth¡­" Jango began saying. Nami and Kaya''s eyes dulled as they stared at it, falling deeper and deeper into a trance, until their eyes were completely lifeless.

    "Good. Now, when I say one, two Jango, you will comply with all of our demands. Ready? One, two, Jango."

    Nami and Kaya slumped forwards, unable to put up a resistance any longer. The boys, who had been watching, called out in concern, but neither of the girls were able to answer.

    "You bastard! What did you do to them!?" Luffy shouted, punching someone in the face.

    "Just a little hypnotism. Nothing to get so worked up over," Jango replied. With that, the group began to leave, but Boo Jack asked a question, "What about him?" They turned to see what he was talking about, only to spot Akisu on the ground, struggling to sit up.

    "He might make a useful hostage. No use wasting a potential asset," Kuro said after a moment. Boo Jack shrugged before reaching down and picking him up.

    "Hey, let me go," he said, trying to escape. But his efforts proved fruitless. He was far too weak to do anything against the pirate.

    Once that was settled, they once more started walking towards the exit, only to be stopped once again.

    "Curse these foul interruptions. What do you want!?" growled Kuro angrily.

    "Sorry, Captain Kuro sir, it''s just¡­ we''re getting slaughtered out there. Can''t you do something?" he asked, staring at the man fearfully. Kuro adjusted his glasses, glaring at the man.

    "How about I give you a choice? Either die to them or die to me. Your choice," he stated. The pirate thought he was joking for a moment, but it soon became clear that he was deadly serious.

    Taking a fearful step back, he gathered what little courage he had and charged at the Straw Hat Pirates with a battle cry, only to immediately get punched in the face by Luffy.

    "Now if that''s everything¡­" Kuro stated.

    "Oh come now, there''s no reason to be so grumpy, Puddin, we won," Honey Queen said, giggling as she grabbed onto his arm again.

    "Damn you woman, release me," he muttered, trying to pry her off to no avail.

    "Tsk, they''re getting away," said Zoro as he cut down another pirate.

    "Get back here you cowards!" Luffy shouted. But their way was barred by the dozens of pirates still left, too afraid to run away, willing to fight them to the death to avoid¡­ a different death.

    Well, to be fair, Luffy and Zoro might not kill them, but Kuro definitely would. Better to take their chances against them.

    Usopp, who had been watching from afar, glared angrily as he watched them disappear into the distance. "Kaya, don''t worry, I''ll come for you!" he shouted in his mind. But first, they had to take care of these guys.

    Another minute or two went by, but it seemed like no matter how many of them they took out, their numbers never decreased. Even with Luffy taking out several at once and Zoro''s skill with a sword, it was starting to look impossible.

    "There has to be something I can do! Kaya''s counting on me!" Usopp yelled in his mind. He searched his satchel for anything that could take them out, when he found a small, pink marble. He pulled it out and stared at it, face slowly morphing into a grin.

    "This is it! With this, I can take them all out at once!"

    He loaded the piece of ammunition, aiming at the crowd of enemies. "Luffy, Zoro, get out of the way!"

    The two turned to see Usopp pointing his slingshot at them. They gave each other a look before shrugging and moving away from the pirates.

    "Take this! Special Attack: Squirrel Star!"

    Usopp fired the pink ball, which exploded into an equally pink mist. The pirates yelled in fear, but looked at each other confused when nothing happened. They gave him a mocking grin as they taunted him.

    "Nice try, loser! Looks like that was a dud!"

    "I wouldn''t be too sure of that," Usopp said with a grin. That only confused them more, especially Luffy and Zoro, who had been expecting¡­ well they didn''t know what they were expecting, but thought something would happen.

    However, their answers would be answered momentarily. Just when it looked like the battle was about to continue, one of the pirates noticed something a little strange.

    "Is that a squirrel?" he asked, looking beneath him. The others looked as well, and indeed, there was a squirrel standing there, looking up at him.

    "What do you want, you little rat? I don''t have any nuts for you, so scram! Shoo!" he yelled. But the squirrel only stared at him for a moment longer before letting out a scream and lunging towards him.

    "Ah, my nuts! Get it off, get it off!" he shouted, while those around him laughed their asses off. Luffy and Zoro, who were watching this, paled. They knew exactly what those little monsters were capable of.

    "Huh? Is that another one?"

    "There''s one over here too."

    "And here."

    "Um, guys¡­"

    They all turned around at the terrified sound the last guy made, and to see what looked like an army of squirrels a hundred strong, all with glowing red eyes, staring at them.

    "Well, fu-"

    But he wouldn''t get to finish his swear as the squirrels chose that moment to attack, causing them to scream in panic.

    Usopp made his way to the other two, watching the carnage unfold. "That takes care of that," Usopp said smugly.

    "Wow, Usopp, I didn''t know you could control squirrels. So cool!" Luffy said. His words made Usopp puff out his chest in pride.

    "Just what the hell was that pink stuff anyway?" Zoro asked.

    "Oh that? Squirrel pheromones," Usopp stated casually.

    "How did you get that?" Zoro asked incredulously.

    "...You don''t want to know," Usopp responded with a shiver.

    "Whatever. With them taken care of we can go after the others," Zoro said. Usopp''s smug look turned serious.

    "Yeah. I''m gonna make them pay for what they did to Kaya and Akisu."

    "Let''s go get our friends back," said Luffy, eyes set in stone. The other two gave him a nod. "Right!"

    The three of them gave chase, running as fast as they could. There was just one problem.

    "Where did they go!?" Luffy shouted angrily. There was no sign of them anywhere. They tried looking for tracks, but there were too many footprints to make heads or tails of what direction they went.

    "Kaya¡­ Akisu¡­" Usopp muttered, clenching his fists. He looked around frantically for some sign of which way they went. Any clue at all. Something!

    "Captain!" they heard a voice shout. Turning, they saw it was Usopp''s friends, Onion, Carrot, and Pepper, running towards them. They waited several seconds until the kids reached them, huffing and puffing.

    "What are you guys doing here, it isn''t safe!" Usopp yelled.

    "We went to your house to see if you were ok, and we saw this weird guy dressed kind of like a skunk tearing your place apart," Carrot said, making Usopp''s eyes widen.

    "Yeah, and when he mentioned Akisu getting captured, we ran over here as fast as we could to help," said Pepper. Usopp sighed, though he couldn''t keep the grin off his face.

    "You guys are way braver than me, you know that?"

    "We know," they all responded at once.

    "You little jerks! Be nicer to your Captain!"

    "We don''t have time for this. We need to find that shifty eyed butler before he gets away," Zoro said in his usual gruff tone of voice.

    "Huh? Do you mean Klahadore? Why are you looking for him?" asked Onion, with the other kids being equally confused. Sure the guy was a jerk but that didn''t explain the vitriol in the green haired man''s voice.

    "Listen, his name isn''t Klahadore, it''s Kuro. He''s a pirate, the one responsible for everything, and he''s after Kaya''s money," Usopp explained.

    "What!?" they shouted in surprise. They just couldn''t imagine it. That stick in the mud butler, a pirate? Their Captain must be joking. But judging from the look on his face, they were starting to have doubts.

    "It''s true. And the worst part is, he took Kaya, Nami and Akisu captive. We need to find them before it''s too late," Usopp said, frustration leaking from his voice.

    "Well, if you''re looking for him, he went that way. Towards the cliffs," Onion said, pointing. The others stared at him for a moment, not quite comprehending what he said.

    "What, how do you know that?" Usopp asked.

    "I saw him and some weirdos going that way with Kaya and the others. I thought that he was taking her somewhere safe. But now that you mention it, I did think it was weird that the orange haired lady was all tied up," he muttered, eyes gaining a contemplative look to them.

    "Gee, ya think!?" shouted Carrot and Pepper.

    "Hahaha, this is great. Now we can go beat them up. Thanks guys!" Luffy said with a big grin.

    "Yeah, not bad kids," Zoro said. The three of them gave big smiles, happy to have been helpful.

    "You did good. Now go where it''s safe. I''m sure your parents are worried for you," Usopp said, lightheartedly chastising them.

    "Yeah, you''re probably right," mumbled Pepper, thinking about it.

    "Alright, let''s go! There''s no way we''re letting them get away," said Luffy, eyes alight with determination.

    The other two agreed, and they began to run in the direction Onion pointed them to. The three of them watched them go, before Carrot spoke up. "Hey, do you think we should have told them about that Nick guy?"

    "Naw, I''m sure they''ll figure it out soon enough," said Onion. Having done their part, the three began heading towards the shipyards, where most of the town had gathered.

    Luffy, Zoro and Usopp raced across the landscape, heading for the cliffs as fast as their legs could take them. Thankfully, they didn''t have very far to go, and within a minute or so, they could make out the forms of the kidnappers, walking towards the cliffs.

    "Hey, stop right there! Give me back my friends!" Luffy shouted. Kuro and the others turned around, surprised and frustrated to see them.

    "Those useless lumps. If I ever see them again, I''ll make sure to end them nice and slow," the fake butler ground out.

    "Ugh, there''s nothing I hate more than persistent men," muttered Honey Queen.

    "Alright, hand them over and I won''t cut you too bad," threatened Zoro. But Honey Queen only looked amused by the threat.

    "You have no idea what you''re dealing with, do you?" she asked with a coy smile, making Zoro''s eye twitch in irritation. He was getting real sick of her mouth.

    "Hey, fake pirate, you ready? I''m about to kick your ass," Luffy said, cracking his knuckles.

    "Is that right? I''m afraid I don''t have time for that. Jango, if you would?" ordered Kuro.

    "You got it Boss. Right awaaaaay?" he trailed off, seeing something in the distance. Looking to see what had him so distracted, Kuro was mildly surprised by what he saw.

    "Oh, look at that Puddin. Your kitty cats are comin to help. Ain''t that just the cutest-" but her praise was cut short when the Black Cats ship, the Bezan Black, opened fire on their ships, hitting the one closest to it and setting it ablaze.

    "What the hell!?" Honey Queen shouted, utterly flabbergasted. And she wasn''t the only one.

    "Uh, did they have a falling out or something?" Usopp asked, unsure of what to make of the situation. Luffy and Zoro didn''t say anything, simply watching and waiting to see what would happen.

    "Those idiots! What do they think they''re doing!?" Kuro yelled, losing his cool again. The Bezan Black fired again, hitting the ship for a second time, causing the mast to fall over. A third round and the ship started to sink, taking all of its crew with it, nearly 150 men in total.

    They could see someone on the deck, but they could make out who it was. It was too dark. But when the ship sailed close enough to the fire on the ship, they were able to make out exactly who it was.

    "Well I''ll be damned. That sneaky son of a bitch," said Zoro, a smirk finding its way onto his face. Usopp''s eyes couldn''t have gone any wider if he tried, and the same could be said for Luffy''s grin, if he wasn''t made of rubber.

    "Nick!" Luffy shouted, waving his hands happily at his friend, glad to see that he was alright. Not only that, but he stole their enemy''s ship!

    Nick stood on the deck, wearing a simple white shirt along with a flowing, red coat. His pants were a matte black, as were his boots, only they had some golden colored trim along the top.

    Not only that, but it seemed like he stole a few more weapons as well, with a cutlass on his left side and a pistol on his right hip. And of course, he had his trusty shovel with him as well, slung over his shoulder.

    The wind was blowing his hair like crazy, and he cut quite the imposing figure, standing there in the glow of the blazing inferno.

    "Hey, which one of you owns this thing!?" he called out, coming to the railing and staring out at the assembled group.

    "Nick¡­?" Nami muttered, her eyes regaining some life to them.

    "You bastard! What the hell have you done!?" shouted Kuro, losing the last of his cool. He couldn''t believe that smart ass from earlier managed to not only steal his ship, but he also destroyed one belonging to his allies as well. It shouldn''t have been possible!

    "Is that you, Klahadork!? Don''t tell me this pirate ship belongs to you!? I''m shocked, really!" Nick shouted, more than a little sarcastically.

    "Little, upstart, bastard," Kuro growled, fingers twitching, desperately wanting to kill the man.

    "Anyway, to answer your question!" he said, putting his foot on the railing and giving them a massive, cocky grin.

    "I stole your ship, bitch!"

 Chapter 32

    Nick was regretting some of his life choices at the moment. Not the one where he stole a ship, because that was awesome. No, the part he was regretting was slamming his leg onto the stolen ship''s railing.

    That was a mistake his injured leg did not appreciate. He did his best not to scream and show everybody how much pain he was in, and was just thankful it was dark out, and they probably couldn''t see the tears coming out of his eyes.

    Not that he was crying, mind you. It was the kind of tears that fell unbidden after cutting into an onion or when you get some dust in them. Totally not tears of sheer agony.

    But through those tears he could see the awe in his friends faces, making him puff out his chest. Of course, that''s when he noticed everything else that was going on as well, namely the fact that Nami was tied up and seemingly unconscious. He wasn''t sure about that last part, as he couldn''t see all that well, but he assumed that if she was being held captive against her will, she would be throwing a hissy fit.

    So that means Chubs Mckinzy over there must have done something to her, and he couldn''t let that slide.

    "Hey, fat ass! What do you think you''re doing with Nami!?" Nick yelled out. Boo Jack looked confused for a second, not realizing he was the one being called out. But when he did, his face turned a shade of red you''d usually only see on a lobster or a really ripe tomato.

    "Who are you calling fat!?" he yelled in response.

    "You Porkchop! Now let my friends go, or else!" Nick threatened. But unfortunately for him, his threat didn''t threaten them.

    "Or else what!? What are you going to do all the way over there!?" Boo Jack yelled back.

    "I''ll tell you what I''m going to do you fat fuck, I''m going to-woah!" Nick yelled, as the ship hit a wave or something, bouncing up on the water and forcing him to keep his balance.

    "Wait, hang on a second! Does anybody know how to stop one of these things!?" Nick shouted in panic, realizing he had no real idea of how to drive a ship. He didn''t even know if that was the right word for it.

    Thinking about it, it was kind of a miracle he was able to get it this far.

    "Idiot," Zoro muttered while slapping his forehead in disbelief. And to think, for a second, he was actually impressed. Luffy burst out laughing while everyone else had a sweat drop.

    "Never mind, I have an idea!" Nick shouted back, rushing towards the wheel. It was actually pretty obvious when you thought about it. What do you do when a vehicle is out of control and the brakes don''t work?

    You simply crash it. Now, some roads have those sand traps that you can drive through if there''s a problem, particularly on those steep, mountain roads, but Nick was out in the open ocean, so it''s not like he could do that.

    Thankfully, there was a nice big ship not too far away that could halt his momentum. He wouldn''t be able to do much damage to the really big one, but the other one, the one that was the same size as the one he just sank, would become a pile of scrap wood on the bottom of the ocean.

    So, with a savage grin, Nick turned the wheel towards them, humming the Pirates of the Caribbean theme song while doing so.

    "What is he doing?" asked Honey Queen in confusion, watching as the ship changed course. But it didn''t take long before she and the others realized his plan.

    "No! He''s going to ram it into our other ship!" she shouted, making the few who hadn''t pieced it together widen their eyes in shock.

    Kuro was seething at the revelation. How was it possible that his plans could get derailed so much? He was Kuro of the Thousand Plans, a genius who managed to outsmart every opponent he ever came across, be they Marine, pirate, bounty hunter or otherwise.

    So how was it that such a simpleton was able to circumvent all his machinations?

    "Jango¡­" Kuro said in a low tone, getting the hypnotist''s attention. "I have a plan, but I''m going to need your assistance."

    Meanwhile, on the ship about to be hit, the crew on board were having a bit of a panic attack. They tried opening fire, hoping to hit Nick, but it was all for naught. Some even had the bright idea to stop him with cannons, but like their buddies, not a single shot found its mark.

    "Man, these guys must have learned how to aim from Stormtroopers," Nick quipped, as gouts of water burst into the sky all around him with every explosion of a cannon ball. The crew who were on the ship about to get rammed shouted in alarm.

    "Is this guy nuts!?"

    "Can nobody aim a cannon!?"

    "Quick, turn the ship!"

    "It''s too late, brace for impact!"

    "Mommy!"

    Nick smirked as the Bezan Black rammed into the larger ship with a loud bang, causing wood to splinter in every direction. The crew were sent flying across the deck, with some even falling into the sea.

    Nick was similarly sent sprawling to the floor, landing with a grunt. But he quickly righted himself, standing up and shaking the cobwebs from his head, putting most of his weight on his least injured leg. "Aw man, that hurt. Maybe not my best idea."

    Making his way over to the front of the ship, he grinned as he saw the massive hole in the hull of the other ship, one quickly filling with water. "Guess they won''t be going anywhere," he said with a smirk. Of course, he wouldn''t either.

    Ramming into them also put a large hole in his commandeered vessel. Not as big as theirs, but it certainly wasn''t seaworthy anymore. And that means it was time to abandon ship.

    Which was the part of the plan he didn''t think through. "Hm, this might be a problem¡­" he muttered to himself, thinking about what to do next. He could always just jump into the water and swim for it, but the sinking ships would be sucking in water to fill the empty spaces. If he was too close, he might get sucked in as well.

    Science!

    In other words, he needed some way to get further away from the sinking ships. But how? That was the million dollar question. Or would it be million Beri question now?

    Didn''t matter, and now was not the time to get distracted by silly thoughts, especially when his life was on the line. Looking around, he tried to get some idea of what to do. That''s when he spotted a cannon. Specifically, one he hasn''t fired yet, meaning it should still be loaded.

    But how would that help him? Sure he could take a pot shot at the sinking ship or the big one, but that wouldn''t really solve his problem now, would it? He was not ready for one last fuck you just yet.

    So what¡­

    That''s when his eyes landed on the mast. It was pretty tall, given the size of the ship, standing defiantly upright even as the ship sank lower and lower into the watery depths. If only it was horizontal, rather than vertical he could-

    His eyes widened at that thought. His head swiveled between the mast and the cannon, back and forth several times before a wicked grin it up his face.

    He had an idea.

    Back on the shore, the two groups were staring between the carnage out at sea, and the enemies in front of them. They seemed to be at an impasse. Luffy tried taking a step forward, but a threat from Kuro made him hesitate.

    "Ah-ah-ah, I''d stop if I were you. You wouldn''t want anything happening to your precious friend now, would you?" he asked condescendingly, wiggling a knife in his hand.

    "You¡­" Luffy ground out, glaring at the fake pirate.

    "Now, how about we make a deal?" Kuro asked, feeling rather smug.

    "What kind of deal?" Luffy asked, rightfully not trusting the other man.

    "It''s rather simple. You let Jango here show you a trick of his, that''s all," Kuro said, fixing his glasses with a conniving grin. Jango''s hypnotism didn''t work on everybody of course, but those with simpler minds were often easier to influence, and given how simple the straw hat wearing boy appeared, well¡­

    "Don''t do it Luffy. You saw what that weirdo did to the girls," Zoro warned, clenching his swords tighter. There was nothing he would like more than to cut that smug smile from the man''s face, but with him threatening the others, there was little he could do unless he was given an opening.

    "He''s right. This is obviously a trap!" Usopp shouted. Luffy listened to both of them, staring daggers at Kuro, but ultimately, it was his decision to make.

    "So all I have to do is watch this trick of his, and you''ll let them go?" he asked, as Kuro gave him a smirk.

    "Of course. I''m a man of my word," Kuro claimed. Luffy kept staring at him for a moment. He didn''t believe the other man for a second. Anybody who thought they could turn their back on the skull and bones in such a manner was not someone who could be trusted.

    "You''re lying," Luffy stated simply, eyes boring holes into the former Captain. Kuro staggered at this, actually feeling surprised. He was certain the simpleton would have taken the bait.

    "So, you can tell when he''s lying, but not this guy?" Zoro said with a smirk, gesturing towards Usopp, who gave an affronted, "Hey!" in response.

    "Usopp''s a way better liar than him," Luffy stated simply.

    "Aw, shucks," Usopp said with a happy blush.

    "I see. So you intend to sacrifice your friends? I didn''t think you were capable of such ruthless actions," Kuro said, adjusting his glasses. Luffy''s eyes turned hard, and he appeared genuinely insulted by the accusation.

    "I''m not sacrificing anybody. I''ll save my friend and kick your ass at the same time," he said, cracking his knuckles. Kuro only smirked at that.

    "I tried to do this the easy way, but I see you intend to be uncooperative. Very well, you leave me with little choice. Honey, if you would?" he asked, looking at her from his peripherals.

    "Of course Puddin. Anything for you," she responded in her typical lovesick manner before sauntering towards the three boys, an exaggerated sway to her hips.

    "And what are you going to do?" Zoro asked with derision. But rather than be upset by his words, Honey Queen merely gave him a smug look.

    "I told you, you have no idea what you''re dealing with. You''re about to find out," she said, her form melting into a gelatinous, dark yellow fluid, catching them by surprise.

    "What the hell is she?" Usopp asked in fear, while Zoro narrowed his eyes. Looks like there was more to her than meets the eye. Luffy however, merely looked curious, wondering what she was about to do.

    "Now then, let us set the stage. Honey Wall: Grand Palisade!" she shouted, placing her hands on the floor. From the point of contact, honey began to shoot out along the floor until it encircled Luffy, causing Usopp to scream as it passed him. Then, it rapidly rose up, creating a massive, 80ft wall, cutting Luffy off from his friends.

    "What is this stuff!?" shouted Usopp in alarm. Looking at it, he was certain it was the same substance that was keeping Nami prisoner.

    "Damn it, we fell right into their trap," Zoro groused, staring at the wall.

    Honey queen, seeing as her job was done, stood up, her form morphing back into her original shape. She gave them a self satisfied look as she flipped her hair. "How do you like it? Not my best work, but I''m in a rush."

    "What the hell are you?" Zoro asked from behind the wall. He could just make out their figures through the dark yellow wall.

    "Me? I ate the Honey-Honey Fruit, making me a honey human. I can turn my whole body into honey and even create things out of honey, as you can see here," she said, sounding rather proud of herself.

    Luffy gave the large wall a confused look, tilting his head in contemplation. "So, this thing is made out of honey?" he asked.

    "That''s what I just said. You''re a bit on the slow side aren''t you-what are you doing!?" she yelled in bewilderment. Luffy, having his question confirmed, opened up his mouth and gave the wall a nice, big lick.

    The other three pirates didn''t know how to deal with this any more than she did. In all her time since she''s eaten her Devil Fruit, no one, not a single person, has ever tried tasting it before. Not even Boo Jack! But for some reason, his next words caused her to turn crimson.

    "Oooo, tasty! Hey Zoro, can you cut some for me!?" he yelled with eagerness. Zoro couldn''t help but smirk at the way Luffy inadvertently dissolved all the tension in the air, just by being his usual, goofy self.

    "Heh, sounds good to me. I''ll cut this thing to pieces," he said, making Luffy cheer, before he gave the wall another good lick.The author''s content has been appropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.

    "Hey, stop that you little pervert!" Honey Queen yelled, face red and flushed. Luffy stopped, his long, rubbery tongue sticking out of his mouth, glistening with a golden sheen.

    "But it''s so good¡­" he whined.

    "I don''t care, stop it!" she yelled. That honey was made from her own body, so in a way, it was like he was licking her.

    Luffy stared at her for a moment, before a lightbulb suddenly turned on in his head. "Hey, if you''re made of honey, does that mean you''re tasty as well?" he asked, licking his lips.

    Honey Queen stared at that long tongue of his, coated in her honey, and nearly passed out from the heat going to her face.

    "No! Only one man is allowed to eat me and that''s Kuro! So don''t even try!" she shouted, embarrassed. The man in question gained an eye tick at the nonsensical babbling around him.

    But before he could properly chastise her, a loud explosion rang out. Looking back, he saw the mast of his ship collapse to the side towards Honey Queen''s ship, Lady Luck.

    "We don''t have time for this nonsense. Restrain him already," Kuro demanded. This seemed to snap the embarrassed woman out of her embarrassed stupor.

    "Right. Now, be a good little boy and stand still," she said, aiming her finger towards him.

    "Honey Bullet!"

    Several bullet sized globs of honey shot towards Luffy. Now normally when bullets came towards him, he just let them hit him and deflected them towards his enemy. But in this case, he felt it was best to dodge.

    "Ugh, stand still you little twerp!" she shouted, doin her best to hit him. But he was just too agile. His body could bend in ways that made her yoga poses look like a joke.

    "Hahaha, missed me!" Luffy taunted, infuriating the woman even more.

    Zoro, who was on the other side of the wall, watched this happen with a growl. Sure, he knew Luffy could probably handle himself in this situation, but that wasn''t what had him upset.

    It was the fact that he was basically useless that pissed him off so much.

    "Like hell I''ll let a wall stop me," he said, bringing his swords up. He then brought them down, cutting deep, satisfying grooves into the hardened material. But his success was cut short as the material began to heal itself, the thick liquid melting together until the wall was pristine once again.

    "Damn it. Now what?" he said aloud. Looking up, then looking back at his swords, he got an idea. Flipping his swords around so he was holding them in a reverse grip, he prepared to start climbing when a whiny voice stopped him.

    "Hey, Zoro, what are you doing?" Usopp asked, running up to him. Zoro stopped what he was doing to give the man an irritated look.

    "What''s it look like I''m doing? I can''t go through the damn thing, so I''ll just go over it instead," he informed him, turning back to the wall.

    "Oh I see. That''s a good idea, let''s go," Usopp said, before wrapping his arms around Zoro''s neck, prepared to piggyback his way up the wall.

    "Oi, the hell are you doing!? Get off!" yelled Zoro, shaking his body to try and dislodge the long nosed liar.

    "Come on, I can''t climb that thing on my own! Don''t leave me here!" Usopp begged, terrified of being left alone on this side. "Besides, the top of the wall is the perfect spot to snipe them."

    "Son of a bitch," Zoro muttered, but didn''t argue the point anymore. He stabbed his blades into the honey wall before starting his climb. Something made more difficult by the monkey on his back.

    Honey Queen panted with exhaustion. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn''t hit the elusive rubber man. Kuro pulled out a pocket watch and frowned at the time. He hated being behind schedule.

    "Honey, if you are incapable of capturing this buffoon then step aside. I shall do it myself," he said, adjusting his glasses while walking forward.

    "No! I can get him. I have one last trick up my sleeve. So just sit back and enjoy the show, Kuro darling," she said, giving him a confident grin. He stopped moving forward, giving her a frown.

    "Very well. You have one minute. If you cannot complete this simple of a task by then I shall be forced to take matters into my own hands," he warned, looking down at the watch in his hands and counting the seconds.

    "That''s more than enough time," she said with a seductive smile. Turning back to her opponent, she started gathering a massive amount of honey in her hands before she placed them on the ground.

    "Honey Swamp!"

    A torrential outpouring of honey began to cover the ground, suffocating every rock and blade of grass. When the copious amounts of goop reached Luffy he began to panic, hopping up and down on alternating legs. But when the honey didn''t do anything but cling to his legs, he stopped his bouncing around, looking at the substance curiously.

    That''s when an idea entered his mind. He remembered the wall and how it tasted. Would this taste the same? Would it be even better? He had to know.

    Reaching down, he gathered a good amount of the sticky honey into his hand before shoving it into his mouth. His eyes lit up with stars. "Yummy!" he shouted, before dipping both hands into the thick liquid below and shoveled handfuls of honey into his mouth.

    "Hey, I said not to do that!" Honey Queen shouted. Luffy looked up at her curiously, his hands firmly in the honey, his mouth shimmering with a golden gleam. Her face was once more red, a combination of anger and embarrassment as she glared at him.

    "Huh? What are you talking about? You said not to lick the wall and I''m not," he argued, shoving another handful of the substance into his mouth. Honey Queen growled, and when both of his hands were in her honey, she quickly hardened it, trapping him.

    "Hey, what the heck!? I''m stuck!" Luffy shouted, trying to pull his hands and feet up only to fail. Honey Queen had a smug look on her face as she watched him struggle in vain.

    "There''s no way you can escape when I''ve hardened my honey. No more bouncing around for you," she said with a flip of her hair, before turning round to stare at Kuro. "See, I told you I could handle it. Did I do good?"

    Kuro, who had been staring at his watch, snapped it shut. "You performed within acceptable parameters I suppose. Now, Jango; it''s time," he said, turning to the half dead man struggling to stay on his feet.

    "What? Is it my turn?" he asked, barely cognizant. But his Captain''s threatening glare returned some of his awareness. "I mean, right away Boss!"

    Jango started walking towards Luffy, who was still struggling against his restraints. However, Honey Queen was distracted by something. "Hm? What are they¡­ Oh I see. Trying to climb my wall are you? Well, we can''t have that. I''ll make sure you don''t make it over."

    Having said that, she melted into the floor of hardened honey below her, merging with it and using it to travel quickly to the wall. Once there, she noticed the swordsman, shoving his swords into her honey, using them as handholds to climb up.

    How clever.

    She also noticed the long nosed buffoon clinging to his back like a baby monkey. It was really quite the adorable sight. Too bad she would have to ruin it.

    Usopp, who was happily enjoying his ride, eager to reach the top and rescue Kaya, heard a strange buzzing noise. Looking over, he saw something coming out of the wall to his left, spinning rapidly.

    "What is that?" he asked himself, quietly.

    "Huh? You say something?" Zoro asked, grunting as he stuck his sword into the wall again, getting that much closer to the top.

    But Usopp''s curiosity soon turned to panic when he saw the thing racing towards them. "Zoro, look out! To your left!" he shouted.

    "Damn it, what now?" he asked, turning to look. "I don''t see anything."

    "That''s because you''re looking the wrong way! I said your left! Why are you looking right!?" Usopp yelled. He then grabbed Zoro''s head, much to the swordsman''s frustration, forcibly turning it in the right direction.

    "Hey, what the-shit!" he shouted, extracting his sword from the wall just in time to block the thing racing towards them. He grunted as he held the thing back with one arm, sparks flying in every direction from the point of contact as the spinning blade met his own. Usopp''s fearful eyes gazed at it, realizing what it was.

    "A buzzsaw! Why is there a buzzsaw here!?" he yelled in panic.

    "How the hell should I know!? Probably that blonde bitch!" Zoro yelled, struggling to keep his arm steady before his ears picked up another sound. He turned towards it, cursing when he saw another saw speeding towards them.

    There was no way he could block both of them. And even if he could, it would leave them totally exposed. There was only one thing he could do.

    "Damn it!" he yelled, placing his feet against the wall and pushing off, sending him and Usopp flying away from the wall. They watched the buzzsaws pass right where they were before landing on the ground and skidding back several feet.

    The two of them stared up at the wall, watching as the things that nearly cut them to pieces merged back with the wall. But then, something else appeared.

    "Ah! A giant!" Usopp shouted, staring at the enormous face that appeared from the wall. Zoro just glared at it, as the image took shape, revealing the woman form before.

    "You¡­" he growled, holding his swords up, "Get out of my way, or I''ll cut you." Honey Queen looked down on them, a condescending smirk on her face.

    "I''d like to see you try. I think it''s time I teach you some manners!" she shouted. All around her, thick tubes began to form along the wall, too numerous to count.

    "W-what the hell are those!?" Usopp screamed fearfully, still clinging to Zoro''s back.

    "Oi, get off!" Zoro shouted, trying to shake him off. But his attempts only made Usopp''s hold all the tighter.

    "I can''t, I have, If I Touch the Ground I''ll Die disease!" he shrieked.

    "Bullshit!" Zoro shouted, but their little spat would come to an end when they heard the sound of Honey Queen laughing.

    "Is this really the time to be arguing amongst yourselves?" she asked. Turning to look at her, their eyes widened.

    "Are those cannons!?" Usopp shrieked once again. All the bravery he had before seemed to have shriveled up in the face of overwhelming power.

    "Let''s see how long you can dodge! Honey Wall: Endless Fusillade!"

    With that shout, the cannons began to fire in a continuous stream. Zoro and Usopp suddenly found themselves staring down a veritable hailstorm of golden colored balls. However, that was only the first part of the problem. As the balls were flying through the air, spikes suddenly jutted out from them.

    "Are you kidding!? The balls weren''t enough for you!" Usopp shouted as Zoro sprang into action. He quickly placed his third sword in his mouth and began to cut any spiked ball coming his way.

    One, ten, twenty, forty; it never seemed to end. Luckily they weren''t hard to cut through, but there was something that was making everything much harder than it needed to be.

    "Usopp, stop choking me!"

    "I can''t!"

    Honey Queen laughed at their efforts, her giant face the picture of glee. "Yes, that''s it! Dance for me!" she shouted, thoroughly enjoying the show in front of her. But she had to admit, it was surprising that she hasn''t been able to land a single hit. Then again, she supposed it didn''t matter. She was only trying to stall them at the moment, not defeat them.

    Zoro''s swords were a blur as he continuously swung them, darted across the battlefield, looking for an opening. But much to his chagrin, he couldn''t find one. The cannons were simply too numerous, it was taking every effort to not get hit.

    "Zoro, get closer!" Usopp shouted, bringing his face towards his own. Zoro glanced at him from the corner of his eye, "What the hell are you talking about?"

    "Listen, if we get close, we''ll be out of range from some of the cannons. The ones to the sides won''t be able to aim at us without hitting the rest of them," he said. Zoro thought about it for a second, before smirking, "Sounds like a plan. Let''s do it!"

    Zoro turned swiftly on his feet, sprinting right for the wall. Honey Queen saw this and laughed, concentrating all her firepower directly at them. "Really? Charging the wall? How desperate can you be?" she mocked.

    However, even without Zoro actively trying to dodge so much, she still couldn''t hit him. "What''s with this crew? Why can''t I hit any of them?" she thought with frustration.

    But even if they were good at avoiding her attacks, there was nothing they could do once they reached the wall anyway. Any damage they did she would just repair. It was completely pointless.

    "So, what''s the plan when we get to the wall?" Zoro mumbled through the sword in his mouth, cutting through the spiked balls coming towards them. Usopp gave him a blank stare as his brain slowly computed the question.

    "Oh crap! I didn''t think of that!"

    "Dumbass," Zoro muttered, staring at the wall, trying to think of what to do, when an idea struck him. The reason he was trying to go through the wall before was because he couldn''t get up it. But now, with all those conveniently placed cannons¡­

    "Hold on!" Zoro yelled.

    "What do you think I''ve been doing!"

    Once they reached the foot of the golden wall, Zoro leapt up onto a cannon, using it to springboard to the next and the next, rapidly climbing higher and higher.

    "Hey, what do you think you''re doing!?" she screamed.

    "What''s it look like?" Zoro asked mockingly. Honey Queen growled in anger. There was no way she would allow them to make a fool of her, not in front of Kuro. She''d teach them a lesson on respecting their betters.

    "I don''t think so!" she yelled, using her powers to form a giant hand above the wall, ready to smack them back down to the ground where they belong.

    "Oh crap! We''re gonna die!" Usopp yelled with tears streaming out of his face. But Zoro wasn''t afraid. The challenge excited him, and he met the challenge with a massive grin.

    "Not today we''re not," Zoro said, before he started to spin his body rapidly in a vertical motion, like he was a saw about to cut through a piece of wood.

    Wonder where he got the idea from?

    Usopp screamed in fear as he held on for dear life. "I don''t want to die!"

    "Three Sword Style: Demon Rampage!"

    After yelling out his attack name, Zoro began cutting through the massive hand, chunks of honey flying in every direction. He sliced through the middle finger and the arm before reaching the wall. Once he did, he stopped spinning and swung all three of his swords down, the momentum carrying the attack, creating an unstoppable shockwave that traveled down the wall before hitting the ground, causing a massive explosion.

    "What the hell!? How are you this strong!?" Honey Queen cried, watching as her wall started to collapse.

    Zoro then stepped on a piece of shattered honey, using it to propel himself over the wall and towards the ground. He landed with a hard thud, Usopp finally being dislodged from his back, eyes spinning in dizzying circles as he fell to the ground.

    The green haired swordsman took the sword out of his mouth before sheathing it. "That wasn''t so hard," he said aloud. His voice seemed to awaken Usopp from his stupor, as he jumped up on unsteady, wobbly legs, grabbing Zoro by the collar.

    "Oi, what the hell was that!? You almost killed me!" he shouted, annoying Zoro. He pushed the long nosed pain in the ass away from him. "What''s your problem now? I got us out of there, didn''t I?"

    "That''s not the point! Be more gentle next time!" Usopp yelled.

    "How about next time you don''t jump on my back," Zoro responded. They were about to continue their arguing, when a familiar condescending voice interrupted them.

    "It seems you managed to escape from Honey Queen. I must say, I''m quite irritated by your continued tenacity," Kuro said, glaring at them as he adjusted his glasses. Seeing him, Usopp instinctively dove behind the nearest meat shield, aka Zoro.

    "Is that right? I could say the same thing about you," Zoro said, staring the other man down. Just then, a giant face appeared from the wall behind them.

    "Kuro, I''m sorry. They managed to give me the slip. But don''t worry, I won''t let them get away!" she shouted. Usopp screamed as he saw her again.

    "There''s no need for that, the preparations are complete. Now, come down here so we may leave," he ordered, making Honey Queen shiver in delight at the dominant tone he used.

    "Right away darling!" she shouted happily, before melting into the wall again. If one looked closely, they could see a bulge racing down the wall, one a little darker shade of gold than the rest of the wall. It then traveled across the honey covered ground before stopping next to Kuro, rising up and forming the sensual body of Honey Queen, who immediately latched onto Kuro''s arm.

    "Now then, it''s time for us to leave," Kuro said, trying, and failing to get the blonde haired woman off of him again. They turned to leave, but stopped when Zoro called out to them.

    "You think we''re just going to let you walk away?" he asked, taking a step forward. Kuro turned to look at him, a smug look in his eyes.

    "That''s exactly what I think. Besides, you have much bigger things to worry about. Honey, if you would release him," he said, gesturing to the slumped form of Luffy.

    "Of course. Whatever you say Puddin," she said happily, snapping her fingers. The honey that was holding Luffy in place softened, freeing him from his confinement.

    "Wait, why would you free him? That doesn''t make any sense?" Usopp asked, confused. But Zoro, suspecting something was amiss, held his swords up in a defensive stance. Luffy turned around, walking towards them with his head bowed, covering his eyes in shadow.

    "Hey, Luffy! What are you doing, the bad guys are that way!" Usopp shouted, stepping away from Zoro and towards his friend. But Luffy ignored him, continuing to walk towards them at a steady gait.

    "L-Luffy?" Usopp stuttered, taking a step back. Then, the straw hat wearing boy lifted his head, revealing his eyes were completely white and filled with rage. He threw his arm back, making it stretch dozens of feet behind him before he launched it forward.

    "Gum-Gum Pistol!"

    His attack flew at Usopp, who stood there, rooted on the spot, unable to move due to fear. Thankfully for him, Zoro appeared in front of him, deflecting the rubber fist with the flat of his blade. It went sailing to the left, ricocheting off the ground and wall before he snapped it back to himself.

    "W-what''s going on? Why are you attacking us Luffy?" Usopp shouted. His eyes then traveled to the smirking form of Jango, looking entirely too smug about everything, remembering what he did to Kaya and Nami. "It was you!"

    "Guilty as charged. If you''re lucky, maybe you''ll live long enough to regret what you did to me before being killed by your own friend," Jango said, doing a little twirl. Or trying to at any rate. His injuries made him stop halfway through, yelling in pain.

    He finished the twirl though, so credit where credit is due.

    "What do we do?" Usopp asked, as Luffy geared up for another attack.

    "Stand back. I''ll handle this," Zoro said, placing his third sword in his mouth again.

    Kuro and the others watched this with great joy as the two friends looked ready to kill each other. "As much fun as this is, we have a schedule to keep. Let us depart while they''re sufficiently distracted," Kuro ordered. But before they could follow said orders, a new voice interrupted them.

    "Hey, Piggy!"

    They turned around to see who it was that shouted, with Nami''s eyes gaining a bit more clarity, only for Boo Jack''s face to become intimately acquainted with a shovel.

    "Get your filthy hands off my waifu!"

 Chapter 33

    Boo Jack''s blubbery face rippled as the shovel smacked him dead center in the face, sending the pig man flying. He landed on his back with a pronounced thump, groaning in pain as he held his now broken nose. Nami, who was thrown over his shoulder, fell towards the hard ground, only to find herself in the arms of a familiar, brown haired, blue eyed man.

    "Hey Nami, are you ok?" Nick asked, concern written all over his face. At hearing his voice, she felt her mind suddenly clear. Her eyes gained their previous luster, and she was once more aware of the world around her.

    "Nick?" she asked, confused. Or at least she tried to, but with her mouth still gagged, it just came out as muffled nonsense.

    "Oh wait, hang on a second," he mentioned, grabbing the dark yellow substance preventing her from speaking. He tried taking it off but found it to be stuck on too tight for him to do so without injuring her.

    He stopped and gave it a contemplative look, before he seemed to come up with an idea. "Hey didn''t blondie over there say this stuff is honey?" he asked, getting a confused nod from Nami.

    "In that case, I know just what to do! All I have to do is eat if off of you," he said, proudly nodding to himself like he just said something extremely profound. Nami''s eyes widened when his words finally reached her brain. He couldn''t be serious, could he?

    But judging by the way his face was coming towards her own, tongue sticking out, ready to lick the honey from her face, he was very serious. Her face went bright red and she felt her body temperature rise a couple of degrees.

    But there was no reason for her to feel this nervous, was there? "I mean, it''s not like he''s actually going to kiss me. But wait, what happens when all the honey is gone? Then we will be¡­" she thought to herself, watching as his face approached closer and closer with each rapid beat of her heart.

    As his lips were about to make contact with her honey covered ones, an angry voice rang out, "Will you people stop trying to eat my honey!" Hearing that made Nami panic, launching her head backwards. Nick, who saw this, became confused before realizing exactly what was about to happen.

    "Nami wait, I was just-" but his words were cut short as she delivered a devastating headbutt to his forehead.

    "Ah, that hurt! What the hell Nami, I was just joking!" he yelled, holding his head in pain. She glared at him, a big red mark on her forehead to match his own.

    "Wer hoo wa I suh hose to noo dat!?" (Well how was I supposed to know that!?) she yelled through the gag, tears in the corner of her eyes. The two gave each other heated looks, her body temperature rising for a completely different reason as sparks flew between their eyes, neither one willing to admit fault.

    Kuro adjusted his glasses, glaring at the man who just might be his most hated enemy, even more than that rubber buffoon. "So, it seems you continue to be a thorn in my side. Why can''t you be a good boy and-" he started to monologue, like all villains do, however¡­

    "Geez, how hard is your freaking head? I think you gave me brain damage," Nick complained, rubbing his sore head.

    "Ahnt doom ahge whoot not ther," (Can''t damage what''s not there) Nami said. Nick wasn''t sure what she said, but he recognized the condescending tone.

    "Huh? Say that to my face, why don''t you!?"

    "Ur jost ded!" (I just did!)

    ¡­He was completely ignored. Kuro''s eye twitched uncontrollably and he began to shake with fury as he listened to the two of them bicker with each other. Honey Queen, who saw this, backed away with a nervous expression on her face.

    Unfortunately, his rage would only be further exacerbated by Boo Jack, who forced himself to his feet, holding his throbbing head in pain. "Ah, damn it! Where the hell did you come from!?" demanded the large man, glaring at Nick for all he was worth.

    Which wasn''t very much.

    Nick turned to him, ignoring the argument he was having with Nami, an excited look on his face. "I''m glad you asked my portly fellow. Allow me to regale you with my tales of heroism!" he shouted, getting mixed reactions from everyone.

    Nami looked annoyed, as did most of the others. But there was a healthy mixture of anger mixed in with a few of them as well, namely Zoro and Kuro. If Luffy was in his right mind, he''d probably be excited for it, but alas, he was not.

    There must have been some part of him that was still there, as he stopped trying to kill Zoro to listen to the story, an odd combination of eager and pissed off gracing his face.

    Usopp was more concerned with his brother and Kaya than whatever story he was about to be told. He couldn''t do much for his crush at the moment, but he could help Akisu, who was thrown to the side when Boo Jack hit the ground, by being his usual, sneaky self and making his way over to him unseen.

    "There I was, standing alone on a sinking ship, surrounded by water and enemies on all sides. But just as all hope seemed lost, I saw something from the corner of my eye. A cannon, one that I had yet to fire. Upon seeing that, I concocted my plan. One as brilliant as it was stupid," Nick continued, unaware of the growing anger being exuded by a certain glasses wearing Captain.

    "I shot the mast, collapsing it on its side, providing me a bridge to escape to the only ship still seaworthy, the S.S I''m Clearly Compensating for Something with This Big Ass Boat. Not the name I would have chose, but it''s not my ship," Nick said with a shrug, getting a smirk from Zoro, and a snicker from Usopp, who held his hand over his mouth, hoping nobody heard him. Nami just rolled her eyes at the juvenile joke.

    "Hey, that''s my ship you''re insulting!" yelled Honey Queen, looking almost as angry as Kuro at Nick''s continued sass. Nick looked her up and down, a suddenly wary expression covering his face.

    "Is that right¡­ You''re not from Bangkok, are you?" he asked, getting a confused look from her.

    "Huh? What are you talking about?" she asked.

    "Not important. Anyway, shush, it''s story time," Nick chided, making her angry look return. "Now where was I¡­ Oh right, the mast had just collapsed, and it looked as if I was free and clear, but right when I was about to cross it to safety, some assholes appeared out of nowhere. They tried to tell me I wasn''t going anywhere and I took offense to that. So I shot em," Nick said, almost casually.

    "But there were so many, and my flintlock pistol only had like¡­ 50 shots left, so I knew I couldn''t take them all. But the fear of death made them duck and cover, providing me ample time to climb onto the mast and run towards safety. Oh sure, they tried to shoot me as well, but their aim sucks and I have plot armor, so I made it across unharmed," he continued. Kuro''s face was turning more and more red as Nick continued his tale of daring bravery.

    "Once there, I jumped for all I was worth, reaching one of the cannons sticking out of the side of the ship. I shot the startled pirates on the other side before shoving the cannon out of my way. Good thing they didn''t think to fire on me, or I would have been toast," Nick said relieved. This of course, only frustrated the leaders of said pirates even more.

    Good help was so hard to find.

    "Once I was in the heart of the enemy ship, I proceeded to fight my way through. I wanted to use some gunpowder barrels to sink that ship as well, but I couldn''t find any. I guess I could have fired a cannon facing downward or something¡­ But wait, would the ball just roll out? Eh, food for thought," Nick commented, getting distracted.

    "I think that''s quite enough out of you-" Kuro said, trying to end this face of a tale, but Nick was having none of it.

    "But as I was saying!" Nick shouted, louder than before, drowning out Kuro. And that did not help the pirate''s blood pressure, not one little bit. He looked angrier than ever, like he was standing over the edge and all he needed was a little push.

    At this point, Usopp finally reached Akisu, shaking him gently awake. The younger boy''s eyes slowly opened, looking around groggily. "Usopp, what''s going on? Where-" he started to ask, but Usopp silenced him with a hand over his mouth.

    "Shh, quiet. Come on, we need to go. It isn''t safe here," Usopp whispered. Akisu looked confused for a second, before he took in what was happening all around him. His eyes widened as he remembered exactly what was going on, before they landed on Kaya, who was still glassy eyed and unaware of her surroundings.

    "But what about Kaya?" Akisu whispered back, worry deep in his eyes.

    "Don''t worry, we''ll get her back, I promise. But right now, we need to get you to safety," Usopp said, getting a reluctant nod from Akisu. Usopp helped his brother to his feet, where the two of them began to sneak back towards the massive hole in the wall, courtesy of one Zoro. As they were doing this, Nick continued to annoy everyone around him.

    "I eventually made my way to the top, knowing my friends were in danger. I hurried over as fast as I could, ignoring my wounds to the best of my ability. Luckily for me, there was this convenient rope bridge connecting the ship to the shore. I might''ve used a honey bridge or something to give me more control of it, but I''m sure you had your reasons," Nick said with a shrug, getting an embarrassed look from Honey Queen.

    "From there, I saw Porkchop here was getting handsy with my woman," Nick said, pulling Nami to him, who had a strange combination of annoyed, amused, and embarrassed written all over her face. "And I couldn''t allow that, so I hit him with a shovel. And now, here we are," Nick finished, looking proud of himself.

    "Soonce whon am oo yer ohman?" (Since when am I your woman?) Nami asked, giving him the stink eye.

    "And she''s so thankful she''s reducing my debt. Aw, aren''t you just the sweetest?," Nick said, making Nami''s eye twitch in irritation. She then proceeded to stomp on his foot, which wasn''t that easy with her legs tied together with honey, but she did her best.

    "Ow, Nami! Why do you have to pick on me so much?" he whined. He knew she didn''t actually say she was going to reduce his debt, but that didn''t mean she needed to try and break his toes.

    "Shoot urp! Jooce fer daht, yer dirt oos dooble!" (Shut up! Just for that your debt is doubled!) she yelled.

    "It''s ok, I accept your apology," Nick said, petting her on the head, making her growl at him.

    But she wasn''t the only one.

    "That''s it! I am sick and tired of being disrespected and ignored. Straw Hat, kill him this instant!" Kuro shouted, his hair falling in front of his face and a manic look in his eyes.

    "Huh? Straw Hat? You mean Luffy? Why would he-" Nick asked, before turning to see the enraged form of his friend, glaring at him with pupilless eyes. It was really rather disconcerting.

    "What the hell''s wrong with him? Shit, don''t tell me¡­" he mumbled, positioning himself in front of Nami, eyes glancing over at the beaten and bloody form of Jango, remembering he was a hypnotist.

    "Geez, what the hell happened to him? Is he missing an ear?" Nick thought, feeling somewhat shocked by the damaged form of the Michael Jackson wannabe.

    "The moron''s been hypnotized so watch out!" Zoro shouted, confirming his thoughts. Nami herself was speechless at this fact. Not that she could talk much anyway with that gag covering her mouth.

    "Well, that''s less than ideal," Nick muttered, raising his trusty shovel as he prepared to fight Luffy.

    Which was a terrifying thought. Nick had enough trouble fighting Buchi, how the hell was he supposed to fight the future King of the Pirates?

    "Can''t think about how. I just have to do it!" he thought to himself, as Luffy threw a fist in his direction.

    "Gum-Gum Pistol!"

    Nick wasn''t entirely sure what to do so he relied on his instincts. He brought the shovel up, like he was playing a game of baseball, before swinging it at the rubbery fist racing towards him.

    He managed to hit it, sending the fist careening to the left, where it bounced off the hardened honey coating the ground and hit Boo Jack square in the nuts.

    The rotund man couldn''t even muster up the strength to scream as foam came out of his mouth and his eyes rolled into the back of his head before he collapsed on the ground.

    "Ah, my bad dude," Nick said, not sounding at all apologetic. In his eyes, the not so little piggy deserved it. That was his greedy little navigator he had his dirty hands on.

    He turned his attention back to Luffy, who looked like he was gearing up for a kick. Nick raised his shovel once more, prepared to deflect the blow a second time.

    "Gum-Gum Stamp!"

    Luffy threw his foot directly at Nick, who brought the shovel down right on his foot. Unfortunately, that didn''t halt the momentum as much as he thought it would, Luffy''s foot bouncing off the ground, cracking the honey before passing between Nick''s legs. He could practically feel Luffy''s rubber toes tickle his undercarriage as the foot went soaring behind him.

    And he didn''t like it.The author''s narrative has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.

    The attack barely missed Nami as well, who fell to her backside when it went by her. She let out a pained grunt as she hit the ground, once, twice, three times. Her ass may not have been made of rubber, but it was firm and perky enough to give her some bounce.

    "Nami, you alright?" he asked as Luffy''s foot sprung back towards its owner. Nick gave a little hop, making sure nothing touched this time. Just because he liked Luffy didn''t mean he wanted to get a footjob from him.

    Nami made a sound he assumed meant she was fine. Well that, or she was cursing up a storm. The odds were about 50/50 on that one.

    Zoro, who was watching, took this opportunity to try and attack Kuro. All they really had to do was defeat him, and their problems were over. At least for now. But unfortunately for him, his Captain was paying more attention to the battlefield than he thought.

    "Your mine," he said through his sword, racing towards the pirate, who only smirked at him. That''s when he saw a foot flying in his direction. Luffy used the momentum of his attack returning to him to immediately launch another one at the swordsman.

    Letting out a swear, Zoro leaned back to dodge, Luffy''s foot taking out a few hairs with how close it was. The green haired swordsman leaped back, watching his Captain with narrowed eyes. Part of him was excited to be fighting someone as strong as Luffy, while the rest of him was annoyed by the whole thing.

    "Damn it Luffy, will you snap out of it already!?" he yelled, his annoyance winning out. But unfortunately for him, Luffy was not so eager to surrender just yet. He growled and stomped on the ground, breaking it, before grabbing two large pieces of rock hard honey, brandishing them as weapons.

    "Guess not¡­ Fine, have it your way," Zoro said, raising his swords. Luffy roared and charged at him, with Zoro doing the same. They met in the middle, Luffy using the honey to block Zoro''s swords. They struggled for dominance for a bit before Zoro used his third sword to take a swipe at Luffy, who leaned back to dodge before kicking upwards, almost taking off Zoro''s head.

    The two then began a deadly dance; dodging, parrying, and blocking each other''s attacks. It was easy to see just how skilled the two of them were, just as easy as it was to see who had the upper hand.

    "Shit, Zoro won''t last long. Luffy''s just too strong and Zoro''s already injured. There has to be something I can do," Nick said, looking around the battlefield. That''s when he spotted the barely standing Jango.

    "Maybe if I can take him out, Luffy will snap out of it. Not sure if that''s how hypnotism works, but I don''t know what else to do. I could try and double team Luffy with Zoro but I''d probably just get in the way. Fuck," he thought to himself.

    Kuro and the rest of them were distracted by the fight, so this was his only chance. If only his damn arms would stop shaking. It wasn''t because he was afraid, it was because Luffy was way too damn strong for his own good, and blocking two of his attacks left them feeling numb.

    But with the power of shovels and guns on his side, he can overcome any obstacle.

    He held his shovel in one land, the blade resting on the ground. He then pulled out the pistol, using the shovel''s handle as a brace. It was still slightly shaky, but much better than before.

    Nami, who managed to sit up, stared at Nick with curious eyes. She saw where he was aiming and silently cheered him on. She also wasn''t sure if that would cancel the hypnosis, but even if it didn''t, at least he wouldn''t be able to hypnotize her anymore. Honestly, she was pretty sure she''d be having nightmares about it.

    Nick thought about aiming for Kuro, but with how fast he was, there was a chance he''d be able to dodge, and shooting Honey Queen would be about as useful as a screen door on a submarine.

    Damn Logia''s.

    No, his best bet to make a difference at the moment was to take out the hypnotizing bastard. If he managed to put any more of them under, they would be finished. So he aimed as best he could, taking a deep breath, and pulled the trigger.

    Jango heard the gunshot and then felt a searing pain in his shoulder. He screamed as he clutched the bleeding wound, falling to the ground. Nick cursed, seeing the man still alive. He was aiming for his chest but it seems he was off a bit.

    He then quickly aimed the gun down and fired, hoping to put an end to this. But Honey Queen acted quickly, erecting another wall of honey that absorbed the shots.

    "Fuck!" Nick swore, seeing his plan fail.

    Zoro skidded back several feet after blocking a particularly strong blow from his Captain. He panted with exhaustion, arms shaking from the strain of parrying the powerful attacks. It wasn''t as bad as Nick''s arms, but if things continued like this, he would lose.

    And that was unacceptable.

    The problem was Luffy didn''t seem tired in the slightest. Whether that was because of his natural stamina or due to the hypnosis, Zoro didn''t have a clue. All that mattered was he was fighting an uphill battle in quicksand, and he was sinking fast.

    He looked over to see what the commotion was all about; seeing Nick pointing a gun at the screaming man on the floor gave him a pretty good idea of what happened. It was a good plan, one that may have succeeded if they were fresh, but Zoro knew how injured the other man was, so he wasn''t surprised when he missed the target.

    Then the wall of honey showed up, blocking any further attempts to take out the hypnotist. That was unfortunate. But what was even worse was him getting Luffy''s attention once again, who began charging at the man.

    "Damn it. Nick, look out!" he yelled out, removing the sword from his mouth. He went to run after him, but there was little hope he would be able to catch up with him.

    Nick looked over at the yell, eye widening to the size of saucers as he saw Luffy charging at him like an angry bull, his arms stretched behind him.

    "Crap!" he yelled, moving to get out of the way, but found his feet firmly stuck to the ground. "Huh?" he said, looking down, only to find his feet coated with honey, preventing him from escaping.

    He shifted his gaze towards Honey Queen, who wiggled her finger at him. "You bitch!" he yelled, trying to get his feet out of the honey. He was just about to use his trusty shovel when he heard Luffy calling out his attack.

    "Gum-Gum Double Barrel!"

    Luffy stopped about thirty feet from Nick, give or take, thrusting his arms forward. They stopped after about ten feet in front of him, launching the chunks of hardened honey in Nick''s direction.

    The brown haired, shovel loving man crossed his arms in front of him, but it was all for nought. The rubble slammed into his stomach with the force of a wrecking ball. The power of the blow shattered the honey holding him in place, sending him flying backwards until he slammed into the wall of honey behind him, a crater forming at the site of impact.

    Blood flew from his mouth and he could swear he heard his ribs snap. He fell to the ground in a heap, struggling to stay conscious. He wasn''t sure if he''d be doing any better if he had taken that hit without any prior injuries. Luffy was just on another level.

    Nami, Usop and Akisu looked on with fearful, worried eyes as Nick struggled to rise, coughing up more blood as he did so. "This is not how I pictured today going," Nick thought to himself, as he managed to get on his hands and knees.

    Zoro was still charging towards Luffy, intent on bashing his skull in and hoping that snapped him out of the trance he was under. Unfortunately for him, Honey Queen pulled the same shit she did with Nick. The ground beneath him softened, causing him to lose his balance.

    "What the!" he exclaimed, as the honey hardened around his feet. "Tsk, like this will stop me," he said, raising his swords up, intent on cutting through the honey and freeing himself. But before he could, thick strands of the goop rose up, capturing his arms and holding them in place.

    "You know, I''m getting real sick of your cheap tricks," he growled, using all his strength to rip the honey off. And he may have succeeded, given enough time, but time was something Luffy wasn''t willing to give.

    "Gum-Gum¡­" Luffy started to say as he ran towards Zoro again, arms stretched behind him. The green haired swordsman''s eyes widened in panic, redoubling his efforts to free himself.

    But it was all for nought.

    "...Bazooka!"

    Luffy struck Zoro with both hands, palms open. Like Nick before him, copious amounts of blood spewed from his mouth before he was sent flying. Surprisingly enough, he didn''t actually hit the wall, as Luffy managed to send him through the hole he made, right past Usopp and Akisu.

    The two of them had wide, fearful eyes when they saw Zoro fly past, mechanically turning to look at the group of pirates, all of whom had their attention on them.

    "And then there was one," Kuro stated with a smirk, surveying the battlefield around him. Things may not have gone quite to plan, but all''s well that ends well.

    "Well Usopp, I can''t say this has been fun and I''ll be quite glad to be rid of the lot of you. Now, be a good boy and hand over the brat, and I''ll let you cower back to the dump you live in," Kuro mocked, fixing his glasses.

    "If you think I''ll just hand him over, then you don''t know the first thing about me!" Usopp shouted, aiming his slingshot right at Kuro. Even though his knees were making a musical by clacking together, Akisu never thought he looked so brave.

    However, Usopp would never be given the chance to fire, as a rope of honey latched onto his hand, covering it and the slingshot up completely.

    "What the heck?" he questioned, before the rope pulled him towards the wall. He hit it with a hard thud, before he slowly started to sink into it. "Wah! Somebody, help!"

    "Usopp!" Akisu yelled, running towards him. Unfortunately, he barely made it two steps before his feet were trapped in honey. He looked down, confused for a moment, before he started to get dragged away.

    He tried to halt his momentum by falling to the ground and grasping at anything and everything he could, but it was useless. He eventually came to a stop, right in front of a certain blonde haired woman.

    "Well, well, well, what do we have here? A little rat trying to escape his trap? Can''t have that now, can we?" she stated, coyly, using her powers to wrap him a cocoon of honey. He tried to scream, but his mouth was soon covered by the liquid, muffling his protests.

    "Hey, what the hell do you think you''re doing!? Let him go right now or-hmph!" Usopp yelled, but was silenced like his brother. At this point, Usopp was completely encompassed in the wall, leaving only his eyes and nose free.

    "Now, now, that''s no way to speak to a woman. Honestly, it''s sad to see so many men with so little manners," Honey Queen lamented with a sigh.

    "Honey, would you mind collecting the others? I think it''s past time we leave," Kuro asked, though it wasn''t really a request.

    "Of course Puddin. Anything for you," she said with a simper, skipping off to do just that. She stopped in front of Boo Jack, who was still unconscious, before kicking him onto his back.

    "Wakey, wakey you useless lump. It''s time to get a move on," she said, bending over to look at his unconscious face before giving it a good slap. His eyes darted open and he shot up, looking around bewildered, before a throbbing pain in his balls reminded him of what happened.

    "Ow, that hurts! That dirty rotten bastard, when I get my hands on him¡­" he threatened, standing up on wobbly legs.

    "Yes, yes, I''m sure your talks of avenging your genitals would make for a riveting conversation, but it''s time to leave. So make yourself useful and grab the girl so we can go," Honey Queen ordered.

    Boo Jack grumbled, turning his attention to Nami but his eyes gained a twisted light in them when he saw Nick, shaking in pain as he tried to stand, glaring at him with impotent anger as he was unable to make it to his feet.

    "Aw, what''s wrong lover boy? I thought you told me to keep my hands off of her? Well guess what, I''m going to touch her all over now, and there''s not a damn thing you can do about it," Boo Jack sneered as he erupted into snorting laughter.

    "Bastard¡­" Nick ground out, wincing from the pain in his ribs. At least the pain everywhere else seemed to dull because of it. Hell, he could barely even feel the gunshot wound in his leg. It reminded him of that 90''s film, Major Payne.

    Want me to show you a little trick? Take your mind off that pain?

    His finger might not be broken but several of his ribs were, which might have been even more effective.

    Boo Jack smirked as he watched Nick curse at him, unable to do much else. But there was in fact something the injured man could do. One that required barely any movement at all.

    Unknown to the pig-like man, Nick never released his hold on his gun. Boo Jack just couldn''t see it from the angle he was at. Which gave him the perfect opportunity to take him out. He aimed it carefully, being as subtle as he could, not wanting them to discover his plan.

    Honey Queen was watching Boo Jack approach the teary eyed woman who was backing away from him, shaking her head back and forth rapidly, screaming something they couldn''t make out, when her eyes drifted back to the much better looking man struggling on the ground.

    He was grinning.

    "Just what does he think is so funny? Don''t tell me¡­ could he be a¡­ does the thought of Boo Jack putting his hands on her turn him on or something?" she thought to herself, feeling repulsed by the notion.

    But of course, Nick was no cuck. She watched as he shifted his position and that''s when she saw it. The gun.

    "Boo Jack, look out!" she shouted, raising her hand to send out some honey to block the shot. But she was too late.

    Confused, Boo Jack turned to see what the commotion was, only to see the smirking form of Nick, pointing a gun at him.

    "Hasta la vista, fatty," he said, pulling the trigger. But what he heard wasn''t the sound of a gunshot, but a click signifying his weapon was empty.

    "Ah, crapbaskets."

    Boo Jack, who had his eyes shut, cringing back in fear, heard the empty click of the gun and opened his eyes. Seeing the defeated form of Nick gave him sick satisfaction, and his lips curled into a twisted smile.

    "You just don''t know when to quit, do you? Perhaps I should show you your place!" Boo Jack yelled, approaching Nick before kicking him in his shattered ribs. He screamed in pain as he was flipped onto his back.

    But Boo Jack wasn''t done. He stomped on Nick''s stomach, once, twice, three times licking his lips as he drew out more and more screams of sheer, utter agony from him.

    "What''s wrong!? I thought you were a tough guy? Well you don''t look so tough! Hyahaha!" Boo Jack yelled with glee, stomping on him one last time and grinding his foot into him.

    Nami looked away, unable to stand the sight of Nick being tortured. It helped, but only a little, as it did nothing to dampen the screams he made. Tears fell from her eyes as she apologized to him over and over again in her mind, knowing he was suffering because of her, because he wanted to save her.

    Usopp and Akisu also had their eyes closed, not wanting to watch. Usopp was once more lamenting his own weakness. If only he was stronger, none of this would be happening.

    However, there was one person who refused to look away. Zoro made it back to the battlefield, walking through the opening of the wall and spitting out a glob of blood. He narrowed his eyes, anger coursing through his veins as he watched his friend get tortured.

    He looked down, spotting a large chunk of rock hard honey and got an idea. Luffy wasn''t the only one who could launch projectiles. He picked it up and threw it straight into the air before adopting a pose, all three of his swords pointing behind him on his left side. He watched as the chunk fell towards the ground, tensing his muscles in preparation for the attack.

    "Three Sword Style: Dragon Meteor!"

    Zoro swung all three of his blades into the chunk of honey, hitting it with the blunt edge of his swords, sending it hurtling towards Boo Jack at breakneck speeds. The large man had just enough time to look back, confused by the yell, before his face was struck by the honey.

    His nose broke instantly upon impact. The slab of hardened honey continued to speed forward, unimpeded by Boo Jack. The large man, however, did not go flying with the honey. Instead, he spun around and around, his entire form a blur, before his head impacted the ground. Blood spurted from his mouth and there was a sickening crack before he lay completely still.

    The entire battlefield grew quiet, the ocean''s waves being the only source of noise. Not even crickets dared to make a sound. Nami and the others looked at Zoro in awe, while Nick did his best to turn his head towards him. Once he did, he forced his arm into the air and gave Zoro a thumbs up before coughing up more blood.

    "You people are like cockroaches. A filthy infestation that I can''t seem to get rid of," Kuro said vitriolically as Honey Queen checked Boo Jack''s pulse.

    "And you''re an annoying bastard who won''t shut the hell up," Zoro clapped back, getting a twitch of the eye from Kuro.

    "Honey, is that fool still alive?" he asked, ignoring Zoro''s comment.

    "Well, he''s breathing," she responded, wiping her hands off on his clothes. His neck was just so greasy.

    "Good enough. Please collect these fools and let''s be on our way. Straw Hat, if you don''t mind, finish off your friends. I grow weary of their continued existence," Kuro ordered. Luffy yelled angrily before charging at Zoro, who cursed as his battle against Luffy continued.

    "Right away, Kuro dear," Honey Queen said, using her power to pick up Boo Jack as well as Nami and Akisu. The last two tried to struggle for freedom, but there was nothing they could do, Honey Queen''s power was just too strong. She carried them back towards the rope bridge, standing next to Kuro and Jango, who managed to get back on his feet.

    "Good, now let us leave. No reason to keep the Bear King waiting," Kuro said, turning on his heels. But before he could leave, a new noise caught their attention. Looking up, they could see the grinning visage of Skunk One.

    "So, how did it go? I trust you were successful?" Honey Queen asked as he landed, an eager look on her face. Skunk One grinned, holding up his hand, revealing a dark blue key. Its teeth were done in an impossibly intricate pattern, etched with symbols that they couldn''t decipher.

    But it was exactly what they were looking for.

    "I can''t believe it was here the whole time. The Bear King is sure to be pleased with our wedding gifts. Good job," Honey Queen said.

    "It was nothing at all my lady. I was glad to be of service," Skunk One responded with a bow. With no more distractions and no one to bother them further, they continued on their way, walking nonchalantly across the bridge.

    Nick reached towards them, but that was all his battered body could do at the moment. Tears of frustration welled up in his eyes as he watched them walk away, Nami staring at him with desperation and fear.

    Battle for Syrup Village!

    Straw Hats vs Kuro and the Royal Flush Pirates

    <u>Winner</u>

    Kuro and the Royal Flush Pirates

 Chapter 34

    Nick stared despondently at the retreating figures, watching as the harpoons that held the rope bridge up extracted themselves from the wall. He heard the crank of the anchor start up as they prepared to cast off.

    Anger coursed through his veins. They lost. How could they lose on the second island? He knew people in his world had a problem with main character syndrome, but he was literally traveling with the main character! So how in the hell could they lose so badly?

    He grit his teeth as he forced himself to stand. His legs shook from the effort, his breathing labored. A sudden and powerful cough nearly sent him tumbling back to the ground, but he managed to hold himself up against the honey wall.

    As this was happening, he could still hear Luffy and Zoro fighting in the background. This only made him angrier. How could Luffy let himself be hypnotized by that second rate pirate?

    He growled to himself, glaring out at the battlefield. "Luffy!" he yelled, getting the enraged man''s attention. He stopped fighting with Zoro, who was breathing almost as heavily as Nick at this point, and turned to see who it was that yelled his name.

    "What the hell do you think you''re doing! They took our friends! Don''t you care!?" Nick continued, his words causing Luffy''s fingers to twitch. Zoro and Usopp stared at the scene with varying reactions. Usopp was hopeful his words would make it through to Luffy, while Zoro scoffed at the idea, believing him to be too far gone.

    "I thought you said you wanted to be King of the Pirates!? Tell me, what kind of king lets himself get controlled by someone like that!? Is this where your journey ends!?" Nick yelled. Luffy started walking towards him. Zoro intended to intercept but a look from Nick stopped him.

    He hoped the brown haired idiot knew what he was doing.

    "Tell me Luffy, what does it mean to be King of the Pirates anyway? Does it mean being someone''s slave, because that''s all you are! Or does it mean you''re free! Freer than anybody else," Nick questioned, as Luffy pulled his fist back, ready to smash the loudmouth''s face in.

    "You made a promise didn''t you! On your straw hat!" he yelled, making Luffy pause. There seemed to be a struggle on his face, and Nick saw, for the first time, that he may be getting through to him.

    "What would Shanks say, huh? If he could see you now! Do you think he''d be proud? Can you really look him in the eye and tell him you became a great pirate after losing to that second rate captain!? After killing your friends? Or will you leave that part out?" Nick''s throat was hurting from the screaming, but his words were getting through to him. He just needed to push a little bit more.

    "You''re better than this, better than him. I actually believed you could be King of the Pirates someday. At least that''s what I thought. But maybe I was wrong. If that''s true, if I really was wrong about you, then hit me! One more good punch ought to do it. Show me the kind of man you are, Luffy!"

    "Ahh!" Luffy shouted, throwing a punch without even calling out an attack name. Nick stared at the approaching fist, putting his life completely in Luffy''s hands. He was serious when he said one more good punch would be all it took. He was barely standing upright as it was. A punch from a pissed off Luffy would almost certainly kill him.

    But Nick believed in Luffy. And not just the character he saw on a screen but the man standing right in front of him. After spending some time around the hyperactive lunatic, he couldn''t help but be drawn to him. Not in the same way he was drawn to Nami of course, but in a way that made you want to follow him, to believe in him. He just had that main protagonist aura to him.

    That''s why, as death rapidly approached him, he didn''t flinch. He stood as straight as he could, watching the fist get closer and closer, not budging an inch. Usopp was panicking, telling him to run away while Zoro watched on, gripping his swords as tightly as he could.

    Both of them thought this was it, that they were about to see Nick die. But to their shock, and relief, something else happened. Luffy''s fist stopped an inch away from Nick''s face, his hair blowing back from the force of the punch.

    The world seemed to pause for a moment as Luffy''s fist lingered in the air. A second or two ticked by before his fist started retracting back towards its owner. They weren''t sure what they were expecting to happen, but Luffy punching himself in the face certainly wasn''t on the list.

    The strength behind the punch was enough to launch the rubber man backwards, his hat flying off his head. The three of them could only stare at this in shock as Luffy hit the ground hard before lying still.

    Nobody moved, wondering if Luffy would get up and continue to attack. But it seemed, for now at least, the battle was finally over. Zoro relaxed his stance, keeping his swords at the ready, just in case.

    "I-is it over?" Usopp asked, though it came out as garbled nonsense through the honey gag. He gets an A for effort though.

    Nick started to make his way towards the rubber man, clutching his injured sides. Every step sent agony shooting through his body, right from the tips of his toes all the way to the follicles of his hair. But he refused to stop. That is, until Luffy''s hat landed right in front of him.

    Was it a coincidence, or was it fate? It felt as if some outside force was compelling to do something, but ultimately left the choice in his hands. Because he was free, and no man should be compelled to act against his own will.

    Nick stared at the hat for a moment, realizing what he had to do. With a sigh, he went through the torment of picking up a hat. That''s not something he ever thought he''d have to go through, at least not until he was an old man threatening kids on his lawn with a sawed off shotgun.

    That''s the dream.

    He grunted in pain, falling to one knee, panting for breath. He reached out with his right hand, the one that wasn''t clutching his side, grabbing hold of his friend''s treasure while Zoro and Usopp watched in silence.

    Not that Usopp had much choice in the matter.

    Nick then forced himself back to his feet, barely holding in the scream of anguish as he did so. He stood there for a moment, trying to find the strength to move. When he did, he took slow, cautious steps towards Luffy, who still had yet to move.

    When he finally made it to him, Nick looked down at the fully conscious man, eyes no longer glassed over, staring at the night sky.

    "Hey," Nick said, not really knowing what else to say. Luffy didn''t answer, at least not right away. He just continued to stare at the sky. Eventually, however, he found the will to ask a question. A very simple question, but one that had staggering consequences.

    "What did I do?"

    Nick blew out a breath of air, once more not knowing how to respond. But looking at Luffy''s face, seeing the vulnerability he was trying to hide, he couldn''t lie. It would be a terrible disservice to the man to do so. He would either rise above his mistakes, or be suffocated by them. The choice was his, and his alone.

    "You got hypnotized and beat the shit out of us," Nick said, making Luffy clench his fists in anger. Who he was angry at, Nick didn''t know, but he suspected he was more angry at himself then Jango or anybody else.

    Zoro wanted to protest that he was beaten in any way but refrained from interrupting. Someday, when the stakes weren''t so high, he and Luffy would have a rematch, and then they''ll see who beat the shit out of whom.

    Luffy''s lips trembled and he moved his arm to cover his eyes. Nick did feel a bit guilty about putting his friend through this, but lying would only be a false kindness. To be a truly kind person, you have to be willing to speak with honesty, no matter how hard the truth might be to hear. Bit of an oxymoron when you think about it.

    "Damn it¡­ What''s wrong with me? How could I¡­" Luffy cried. He couldn''t believe he attacked his own crew, his friends, and tried to kill them. How could he call himself a Captain if he let someone tell him what to do like that?

    "You screwed up. There''s no two ways about it. The real question is, what are you going to do about it now?" Nick asked, staring down at the distraught man, eyes hard and without sympathy. That wouldn''t be of any help right now.

    Luffy took his arm away, staring up and Nick with confusion, eyes filled with watery tears. "What do you mean?"

    "Our friends were captured. Are you going to just abandon them to wallow in self pity, or are you going to help save them?" Nick asked, holding out the straw hat for Luffy to see.

    "Tell me, who are you, Monkey D. Luffy? Are you the type of man who leaves his friends high and dry when the going gets rough, or will you sacrifice everything to save them? Will you renounce your dream to become the Pirate King because of a mistake, or will you learn from this and grow stronger? The choice is yours, Luffy."

    "Will you stand up and fight, or will you lay there and die?"

    You might be reading a pirated copy. Look for the official release to support the author.

    Luffy continued to stare at the hat, his mind wandering back to Shanks. The man, for all his power, rarely picked a fight. Not unless someone threatened the people he cared about, like when he himself was threatened by the mountain bandits. Shanks was happy to let the insults roll right off his back, but the moment they pointed their weapons at Luffy, all hell broke loose.

    Luffy modeled his entire personality off of the man. He wondered, what would Shanks do in this situation? The thought actually made Luffy smirk, as he wiped the tears from his eyes. It was a pretty stupid question. He knew exactly what Shanks would do.

    And it was the same thing he would do right now.

    Luffy''s eyes, now vacant of tears, gazed up at his hat with a steely, determined expression. He stood up slowly, standing in front of Nick, who was holding out his hat for him to take. He knew what taking the hat right now meant, and what it would mean if he refused.

    His hand reached out, grabbing his treasure without the slightest bit of hesitation, before placing it back on his head, where it belonged. "Thanks Nick. I needed that," he said, making the brown haired man smirk at him.

    "Anytime."

    Nick then watched as Luffy started walking towards the edge of the cliff, focusing on the retreating ship. There would be no way for the rubber man to reach it, no matter how stretchy he was, so he wondered what he was doing.

    A thought echoed by Zoro and Usopp.

    But as he continued to walk, Nick could swear he heard music. The same song he remembered from the walk to Arlong Park. He didn''t know if it was all in his head or just the Voice of the World, but either way, it made his hairs stand on end.

    [Play One Piece OST: Overtaken]

    Luffy reached the cliff''s edge, staring out at the distant ship, his eyes brimming with resolve. He then took in an enormous amount of air, his body expanding like a balloon.

    "Nami! Kaya! Akisu!" he shouted, loud enough to shatter eardrums. Nick and Zoro covered their ears in pain, while Usopp was glad he had his own earplugs.

    The three people in question perked up their ears at hearing his voice, and Kaya''s eyes cleared of the hypnotic trance she was in. "Luffy?" they all thought, a feeling of hope brimming within their chests.

    "What the heck was that?" asked Boo Jack, looking around confused. But there was one of them who was not confused, and that was Kuro, who glared back at the shoreline.

    "So it seems he''s snapped out of it, has he? Well, no matter. There''s little he can do now," Kuro said with confidence, fixing his glasses with a self satisfied smirk.

    "We''re coming to save you! I promise! So don''t give up, understand!"

    Hearing this, tears gathered in their eyes, a feeling of resoluteness washing over them. They would trust in his words and believe in him, each one making a promise to themselves to hold on, for as long as it took.

    It was strange, at least for Nami, to put her trust in a pirate, but at the same time, there was something different about Luffy. Somehow, she knew he would come to save her. Just like she knew that Nick, no matter how injured he may be, would be right there with him.

    "Aw, isn''t that sweet. Just so you know, if he does show up, he''s a dead man," Honey Queen stated, giving Nami a smug smirk. But Nami wasn''t listening. They didn''t know those guys like she did. They would save them, she just had to stay alive until that happened.

    Luffy watched the ship sail further away for a bit before turning around. Nick and the others watched with smirks on their faces. Even if they had permanent damage to their ears, it was an inspirational speech.

    Made Nick and Zoro eager to get some payback.

    "So, what''s the plan now Captain," Nick asked as Luffy neared him. The rubber man stopped, holding his hat to his head as a fierce gust of wind threatened to blow it off.

    "Now we go after them, and get our friends back," he said, eyes filled with a determined fury.

    "That''s what I''m talking about. Let me just go and grab my shovel," Nick said, hobbling back towards his favorite weapon. While he did this, Luffy walked towards Zoro.

    "Zoro, I-"

    "Look, if you''re planning to apologize, save it. Right now, we have bigger things to worry about. But let me just say one thing," he said, sheathing his swords once again. "I didn''t join you to lose to second rate scrubs like them. Understand?"

    Luffy stared at him for a moment before nodding his head. "Yeah, I getcha. It won''t happen again, I promise."

    "Then there''s nothing to worry about. Now, let''s go get some revenge." The two of them shared a savage grin, one that scared the hell out of Usopp. It looked like a pair of demons plotting to go on a murder spree.

    And to be fair, he wasn''t far off.

    "Hey Zoro, no fair. You''re supposed to be having a bromance with me, and yet I find you cheating on me with another bro? How could you?" Nick said, clutching his chest in exaggerated agony.

    "I told you before, we are not in a bromance!"

    Luffy chuckled a bit as his crew returned somewhat to normalcy, but that still didn''t quell the burning in his heart. Today, he failed as a Captain, but luckily, he had an amazing crew that had his back.

    The three of them started to leave, with Zoro and Nick bickering lightheartedly. It was made even more amusing by the fact that Nick had his arm over Zoro''s shoulder for support.

    Clearly a bromance.

    "Hey, what about me! Don''t leave me here!" shouted Usopp, though no one could understand a word of what he said. He struggled as hard as he could against his imprisonment, but he couldn''t make it budge an inch.

    *Line Break*

    "I can''t believe you left me there! What''s wrong with you!" Usopp shouted, still trapped in a block of honey. When the group eventually realized their mistake, they of course traveled back for him. Or at least, Zoro and Luffy did, because Nick was not walking back, no siree.

    Usopp could suck it.

    Once they got there, Zoro proceeded to use his swords to cut him free. Usopp tried to stop him, shaking his nose back and forth in defiance, crying in a panic, but it did little to dissuade the swordsman.

    Once Usopp was cut free, Zoro stabbed two of his swords into the block of honey, using them like handles to drag Usopp behind him. It also made for a convenient perch for Nick and Luffy to sit on.

    Nick due to his injuries, and Luffy because he wanted to eat the block of honey.

    "Mm, so yummy!"

    "Luffy, you better not bite me!"

    "Damn it, should have left his mouth covered," Zoro griped, which offended the trapped liar.

    "What did you say!?"

    "Tsk. So what exactly is the plan here? We can''t exactly go after them without a ship," Zoro said.

    "Merry," Usopp stated, after thinking about it for a moment.

    "Usopp, I''m flattered, but I think we should just be friends," Nick said, giving the man a shit eating grin.

    "Not that kind of marry you idiot! I mean the butler! He has his own ship that he uses to run errands. I''m sure he''ll let us borrow it," he clarified.

    "What, am I not good enough for you?" Nick continued to tease.

    "Hell no!"

    "That''s fine. At least I still have Zoro."

    "Drop dead."

    "Aw, I love you too buddy!"

    "Ow, Luffy, I said no biting!"

    "My bad."

    By the time the four of them made it back to the mansion, Luffy had eaten most of the honey off of Usopp, which was both a blessing and a curse. He may have been free now, but he was all slimy.

    Nick, who wasn''t there for the battle, as he was preoccupied with stealing a boat, whistled in appreciation at the carnage. Bodies were strewn all over the place, with most of them covered in bite marks. "Damn, what the hell happened here? I expected there to be bodies, but these guys look like they were mauled by a wild animal."

    "That was all his doing," Zoro said, pointing his thumb towards Usopp, who puffed his chest out proudly.

    "Really? He bit and scratched all of them? I expected him to use his slingshot or something. Guess there''s more to you than meets the eye," Nick said, sounding both impressed and disturbed at the same time, making Zoro snort in amusement.

    "I didn''t bite them! I used squirrel pheromones to make those furry little monsters attack them!" Usopp shouted. Nick made an "oh" face, before returning his attention back to the bodies and shuddering. "That explains the white all over them¡­"

    "Never mind that, we need to find Merry. He was pretty injured the last time I saw him, so he''s probably still in Kaya''s room. After that, we need to tell the villager''s all about Kuro. With Merry backing us up, they''ll have to believe us," Usopp said, getting a nod from Luffy. Zoro appeared indifferent to the plan, but Nick¡­

    "Listen, I don''t think that''s a good idea," he said without an ounce of his usual humor in his voice. They turned to look at him, noting the serious tone of his voice.

    "What, why not. After everything he did, they deserve to know the truth," Usopp said with anger. Just the thought of what that bastard did to his home infuriated him.

    "You may be right, but do you think Kuro didn''t account for us blabbing about his true identity? If he was truly worried about such an outcome, he would have killed us back at the cliffs personally," Nick said, making Usopp pause in thought.

    "Yeah, maybe, but you don''t know that for sure," he countered.

    "You''re right, I don''t. But the man has been planning this for years, so I doubt he left much to chance. We might have thrown a wrench in his plans, but that''s all we did. If I had to guess, he probably has a plan to frame both you and Merry for his crimes. Some kind of falsified evidence and with that hypnotist pal of his, he could probably get away with it," Nick explained further, getting a dark look from Luffy at the mention of Jango.

    "So we just have to take him out," Usopp tried, but Nick wasn''t done.

    "And even if they do believe you over Kuro, he might just go ahead and kill them all. Start over with a fresh group of people, eager for new opportunities."

    Usopp clenched his fists in anger. He knew Nick was right, but he hated having to pretend like that butler was one of them. It was infuriating! Maddening! But the whole town knew of the animosity between them, so even with Merry''s backing, there would still be doubts.

    "Listen," Nick said, placing his hand on Usopp''s shoulder. "I know it''s frustrating, but the best thing we can do is go and beat the shit out of them. I''m sure between Merry and Kaya, they''ll believe you. And with Kuro beaten, there''s no chance for retribution."

    This calmed Usopp down, at least a little. He was still angry, but he could hold it in for the sake of his home and all the people he cared about, especially Kaya.

    "Hey, didn''t we tell those kids about the faker?" Luffy asked, making the others turn to him. Nick had no idea what he was talking about, but Zoro and Usopp did.

    "Ah, crap! I forgot about them! Quick, we have to go and warn them!" Usopp shouted, fracking out. He tried to run away, but Zoro grabbed him by his collar, keeping him in place.

    "Will you calm down?"

    "How am I supposed to calm down!? You heard what he said. I have to stop them from talking before it''s too late!" Usopp shouted, unable to calm down in the slightest, hypochondria in full swing. He kept trying to run, but Zoro simply held him in place, making the whole thing rather comical.

    "Listen, by now they''ve either spilled the beans or they haven''t, but rushing off half cocked will only make things worse," Zoro stated, making Usopp stop running in place.

    "Yeah, but¡­ fine, you''re probably right," he sighed, and Zoro let him go. He stood there, dejected for a moment, before he turned back to them with a determined look in his eyes.

    "Right then, let''s go find Merry and see if we can borrow his ship."

    "You and Luffy go ahead. Zoro and I have something to take care of," Nick said, getting confused looks from all three.

    "And what the heck is that?" Usopp asked.

    "Don''t worry about it. You two just go and get us that ship," Nick said. Usopp looked like he wanted to question him some more, but a hand on his shoulder prevented him from doing so. Luffy had a serious look on his face as he stared into Nick''s eyes, before giving him a nod.

    "Right. Usopp, let''s go," he said, dragging the long nosed man towards the mansion, much to his protests. Once the two of them were inside, Zoro turned his attention back to Nick.

    "Alright, what is this all about?" he asked, arms crossed over his chest, giving the taller man a glare. Nick sighed, looking out at the sea of bodies around them.

    "Look, we don''t know where their base is, so we''re going to need someone to guide us. I need your help to gather up a few of the survivors," Nick stated, a resolved look on his face.

    "I want to have a little talk with them."

 Chapter 35

    Luffy and Usopp ran through the mansion, hoping to find Merry still alive in Kaya''s room. They did run into a small snafu, courtesy of one Honey Queen, but her wall was no match for the might of Luffy''s fist.

    He Gum-Gum made it get the fuck out of the way. As they neared Kaya''s room, they heard a gunshot. Stopping, they turned around, looking towards the entrance. "W-what now!? Haven''t we dealt with enough already!?" Usopp shouted.

    Luffy however, had an idea of who it was. He wasn''t entirely sure what Nick was planning, but he trusted that whatever it was would help them save their friends.

    "Come on, let''s find Sheep Head Guy," Luffy said, continuing to run towards the room.

    "Oi, wait for me!" Usopp shouted, sprinting behind him. The two eventually made it to the room, stepping over the rubble Usop created when he blew the door open. Usopp immediately turned to look towards the spot he last saw the possibly dying man, only to find him missing.

    "Crap, where is he!?" Usopp shouted, looking around in a panic. Surprisingly, it was Luffy who noticed the trail of blood on the ground, leading out of the room. Curious, he began to follow, leaving Usopp to panic all alone in the room.

    "Alright, we need to think. If I was an injured butler, where would I be?" Usopp asked, crossing his arms and closing his eyes in contemplation. He thought long and he thought hard, but no matter how much he forced his brain to work, he couldn''t come up with an answer. He could be anywhere! And Usopp didn''t know where they kept the first aid kit either.

    "No choice. Luffy, we''re going to have to-Luffy?" he asked, looking around in confusion at the fact that he was all alone. "Ah, where did you go!? Don''t leave me! Luffy!"

    Said rubber man was currently elsewhere, his easily distracted brain curiously following the trail of blood. He looked ahead and saw that it turned right. Peeking his head around the corner, he noted the trail heading into another door.

    Casually making his way to the door, he opened it without a second thought. Only to find himself deafened by the sound of a gunshot. The lead round hit him square in the chest, but seeing as he was made of rubber, it did little more than startle him. His back extended with the bullet, before he sent if flying away.

    "Hey, what''s the big idea!?" Luffy shouted angrily, steam seemingly coming out of his ears.

    "Ah, Luffy, is that you? My apologies, I believed you to be one of those scoundrels and acted without thinking. I do hope you are alright," stated a familiar voice. Hearing the apology, Luffy calmed down, staring at the person in the room with a questioning look in his eyes.

    "Hey, I know you. You''re the guy with the sheep head. We were just looking for you. What are you doing here?" Luffy asked as he entered the room. Looking around, it appeared to be a medical office of some kind, filled with various tools and equipment used to treat somebody.

    Luffy had little to no idea how any of it worked. The only fort aid he knew how to do was wrap somebody up in bandages.

    "Ah, yes, well¡­ after I was shot I came here to treat my wounds. I still have some fight left in these old bones," Merry said, flexing his bicep, only to immediately regret it, grabbing his side in pain.

    "Shishishi, you''re pretty tough, aren''t you old guy?" Luffy said, a wide grin on his face.

    "Well, I don''t know about that, but I''m not dead yet. Anyway, enough about me, what happened to the mistress? Is she alright?" Merry asked, almost begging Luffy for information on the girl.

    Luffy looked downcast, covering his face with the brim of his hat. "I-"

    "There you are, Luffy! I heard a gunshot, are you alright? What were you thinking running off like that!? What if there were still pirates around here, huh? I''d be a sitting-Merry?" Usopp shouted, breathing heavily. Once he heard the gun go off, he panicked, but this had the fortunate side effect of letting him find the trail of blood. Figuring that must be where Luffy went, he followed as well.

    Turns out his hunch was right.

    And not only did he find Luffy, he also found none other than Merry.

    "Usopp, thank goddess you are alright. I was so worried. Please tell me Miss Kaya is safe," Merry pleaded. Whatever Usopp had planned to say died on his lips at Merry''s expression. His mouth opened and closed like a fish, but no words came out.

    "Sorry, but she was taken," Luffy said. The two of them turned to look at him, one with guilt and one with denial.

    "No, it can''t be. Tell me you''re joking. Tell me this is another one of your lies, Usopp!" Merry besieged them. But their silence spoke more than any words ever could.

    "Miss Kaya¡­ How could this happen?" Merry said, slumping down onto the ground. Usopp grit his teeth, a feeling of self loathing rising up from the pit of his stomach.

    "I''m sorry. I wasn''t strong enough to save her," he said. His fists clenched and tears formed in the corners of his eyes.

    "It wasn''t your fault Usopp, it was mine," Luffy said, getting their attention. They turned their self deprecating gazes towards the rubber man, but what they saw wasn''t the form of a defeated man, but one brimming with determination.

    "I let myself be controlled by that weirdo, and because of that, our friends got taken. But I promise, we''ll get them back, no matter what. But we need your help," Luffy said.

    "My help? Whatever could you need my help with?" Merry asked, confused. Usopp furiously wiped the tears away, angry at himself for getting down again. He would save Kaya and Akisu, no matter what it took.

    Oh, and Nami too.

    "We need a ship to go after them, and I know you have one. One that hasn''t been damaged in any of the attacks. Please, let us borrow it, just for a little bit, so we can go and save them. I''m begging you," Usopp asked, bowing his head to Merry.

    The butler didn''t know what to say, shocked by the request. But seeing how determined the two of them were, well¡­ he couldn''t help but get swept up in the emotion of it all. He ford himself to stand, looking at the two young men in front of him with a steely gaze.

    "Raise your head Usopp. I''m more than happy to lend you the Going Merry to save Miss Kaya. I have but one stipulation," he said, as Usopp stood up straight.

    "Anything, just name it!" he said. Merry walked over to him, placing his hand on his shoulder and looking him dead in the eyes.

    "Just make sure she comes home safe and sound," he said, giving Usopp a smile. The long nosed man''s face lit up in a grin.

    "Damn right! Nothing is going to stop us, right Luffy!"

    "Right. We''ll kick their ass and save our friends. I won''t fall for the same trick twice," he said, slamming his fist into his palm, eager to get some payback. Usopp and Merry smiled at him, feeling encouraged by his simple words, when a horrifying, inhuman noise aroused an ancient primal fear from the depths of their souls.

    "What is that!? A monster!?" Usopp shouted, looking all around in a panic. Merry wasn''t far behind, holding up his pistol with a trembling hand. The only one not freaking out was Luffy, and for good reason.

    "Maa, so hungry¡­" he whined, holding his stomach. The reason Luffy wasn''t afraid, is because the noise came from him.

    "Are you kidding me!?" Usopp shouted, glaring at the rubberman. He then stomped over to him, and pulled his cheek in anger. "Don''t scare me like that! Are you trying to give me a heart attack!?"

    "Ow! Usopp, let go!" Luffy demanded, pushing against the long nosed man''s face.

    "Not until you apologize!" Usopp growled back, pulling on Luffy''s other cheek. The two then began a small wrestling match, with Usopp trying to see just how far Luffy''s cheeks could stretch, and the rubber man trying to yank him off.

    Merry sweat dropped at this, wondering if it would really be ok to trust them to rescue Kaya. But he didn''t have much of a choice.

    "Mr. Luffy, there may still be some food left in the kitchen. I''m not sure how much considering the amount you already ate at dinner, but-" Merry started to suggest, only to be startled by Luffy''s face appearing right in front of him. Usopp still had a hold of his cheeks, meaning they were stretched back several feet, while the rest of his head was right in front of him.

    "Really!? Where!?" Luffy asked, starting to drool.

    "Oh, it''s right down the hall, to your left. Just take the stairs to the lower level and-"

    "Thanks old sheep guy!" Luffy interrupted again, his head snapping back towards his body, before running out the door. Usopp, who still had a firm grip on his cheeks, widened his eyes in shock as he was dragged along, practically flying from the speed that Luffy ran at.

    "Ah! Luffy, wait, slow down!" he shouted, but Luffy wasn''t listening. He was far too eager to fill his belly with meat. That was the only thing on his mind at the moment. Once he was good and full, he would be at optimal ass kicking efficiency.

    "Luffy, you''re going the wrong way! Take a left, a left!" Usopp shouted from behind him, which was the only thing that Luffy could catch through his selective hearing.

    He immediately took a sharp left turn, which was unfortunate for Usopp. His body kept going forward, slamming into the wall as it tried to compensate for Luffy''s movement. The rubber man''s cheeks were stretched against the corner as he ran down the other hallway, completely oblivious.

    "Ow, that hurt," Usopp moaned, before his eyes widened in panic as he began to slide forward. But rather than let go of Luffy''s mouth, he only gripped tighter, his fear causing him to make the wrong decision.

    "Oh no, Luffy stop!" he begged, as he was yanked forward, his body slamming into the other hall''s wall. Luckily, or unluckily, depending on how you look at it, he didn''t get stuck this time, but he did start to bounce around every which way, hitting the walls, the floor, the ceiling; everything as Luffy kept running.

    The story has been taken without consent; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.

    And all he could think to do was scream.

    This continued until Luffy, using his highly attuned nose, found the entrance to the kitchen. What he didn''t know was that Usopp was right behind him, not until he slammed into him. The two went tumbling further down the hall, rolling along the floor until they stopped, a tangled mess or limbs.

    "Ow, Usopp, what was that for?" Luffy whined, disentangling himself from the sniper.

    "Me!? I was telling you to stop the whole time! Learn to listen, Luffy!" Usopp shouted, Luffy closing his eyes as spit from the enraged shouting hit him in the face.

    "Ew, don''t spit on me! It''s not my fault I couldn''t hear you," Luffy claimed, pushing Usopp away.

    "Then whose fault is it!?" Usopp returned.

    "I don''t have time for this! I need meat!" Luffy yelled, pushing Usopp away.

    "Hey, don''t you ignore me!" Usopp yelled, grabbing onto Luffy''s stomach, trying to stop him from going anywhere.

    "Get off! Stop getting in the way of meat!" Luffy shouted, pressing on Usopp''s face again, trying to dislodge the temperamental liar.

    "Not until you apologize!"

    The two would have continued to argue more, but the sound of three more gunshots ringing out distracted them. They turned toward the direction it came from, Usopp with fear, and Luffy with curiosity.

    "More gunshots? Whose shooting, and why? I thought everyone outside was already beat?" Usopp questioned, gripping Luffy tighter in his fear. But Luffy was unconcerned with the sound, figuring that Zoro and Nick could handle things if there was any trouble.

    Instead, he was far more concerned with the state of the kitchen. Opening the door, he made his way inside, casually dragging a terrified Usopp with him. Once he was there, he looked around for any sign of food. But much to his dismay he was unable to find any.

    "Hey, what gives? That old butler guy said there would be food here," Luffy whined, holding his gurgling stomach in misery.

    "Try¡­ the pantry," Usopp said, raising a shaky hand to point out a door on the other side of the room. Seeing this, Luffy gave a big grin as he ran towards it, finally dislodging Usopp as he did so, whose face met the floor. Swinging the door open with gusto, his eyes sparkled as he saw all the food.

    "Food!" he shouted, stretching his arms to reach anything and everything that looked edible and shoveling it into his mouth. To Usopp, who was laying on the floor, moaning in pain, it sounded like a wild animal had gotten into the pantry.

    Someone really needed to teach Luffy some manners.

    Several minutes went by with Luffy horking down all the remaining food. He did choke a time or two, running to the sink to chug water from the faucet and then running right back in for the next round, but eventually, they ran out of food.

    Luffy sat down on his now enormous ass, burping in satisfaction as he patted his cartoonishly extended stomach. "Ah, tasty," he said with satisfaction. Usopp stared at this with enormous eyes.

    "Where the hell do you put it all!?" he screamed. He knew he could eat, dinner proved that much, but this was something else.

    "Ah, I see you found it. I''m gla-oh my, what happened?" Merry said, who managed to make his way to the kitchen after finishing patching himself up. He expected to see a mess, but what he didn''t expect to see was Luffy looking like he just put on about 300 pounds in the span of 10 minutes.

    "Don''t worry about him, he just has no self control. But what are you doing here?" Usopp asked. Merry, still somewhat in a daze, turned to look at Usopp, seemingly composing himself.

    "Right. Well, I grew concerned after hearing those gunshots and came to check on you. I''m glad to see nothing has happened," Merry said, wiping a bit of sweat off his face with a handkerchief.

    "Yeah, that has me worried too. We should probably head out, make sure the others are ok. Luffy, are you ready to go?" Usopp asked, turning to the rotund rubber man. Luffy jumped up onto his feet, throwing his fists into the air. "Hell yeah! I''m at maximum power now! Let''s go get our friends back!"

    Having said this, Luffy then tried running out of the kitchen, only for his now fat body to get stuck in the door frame. "Hey, what the hell! I''m stuck!" he shouted, flailing about in the door frame, trying to get free.

    "Are you kidding me!?" Usopp shouted. But he wasn''t. Luffy''s fat ass was stuck, and there was nothing they could do about it.

    *Line Break*

    "What the hell is taking them so long?" Zoro grumbled, glaring at the entrance to the mansion. He wanted to go inside and look for them, but a desperate shout of, "No!" from Nick stopped him.

    Damn worry wort. Like anything would happen. Besides, he was more than capable of looking after himself.

    Little did the swordsman in denial know, that wasn''t what Nick was worried about. If Zoro wandered off, there was no telling where he would end up, and he did not want to go looking for him right now.

    "Just have some patience. I''m sure they''ll be out any minute now," Nick said, trying to calm the irate man down. He was sitting on a stone wall, one used for landscaping, enjoying the peace and quiet for a moment.

    It was stymied a bit by the pain in his ribs. And in his leg. And his back. And just about everywhere else too. He really needed a training arc, and soon. He was tired of the ass kickings he was getting. Sure, he may have won most of those fights, except the one with Luffy, but he''d like to win unscathed for once.

    Was that too much to ask?

    A few more minutes ticked by before they heard the sounds of voices. It sounded like Usopp chastising Luffy about something, but what could he have done this time? All they needed to do was find Merry, how much trouble could he cause doing that?

    "I can''t believe you Luffy! Why would you break the whole wall?" Usopp asked.

    "It''s not my fault the doorway was too small," Luffy countered, but there was something off about his voice. It almost sounded like he was out of breath, straining to speak.

    "It is too! If you hadn''t eaten everything, you could have fit through the door just fine!" Usopp countered, making Zoro and Nick turn to look at each other, a sneaking suspicion crossing both of their minds.

    "But I was hungry! Just make bigger doors next time," Luffy countered, making Usopp splutter in disbelief. It was at this point that they could make out three figures walking towards them. Usopp, Merry and-

    "Luffy, what the fuck happened to you?" Nick asked, looking at the now obese man. Not only that, but he seemed to have gained a foot or two of height as well.

    "Oh, hey Nick. Everything ok out here?" Luffy asked, looking around. He made to take a step forward, but managed to trip on the stairs, as his stomach was so big he couldn''t see the step in front of him.

    He yelled in fright as he went bouncing down the stairs, landing on his stomach and spinning around. Everyone who watched this had a sweat drop on the back of their head.

    "Damn it Luffy," Zoro said, running his hand down his face in embarrassment. When Luffy stopped spinning, he slowly got back to his feet, almost losing his balance as he did so.

    Once he did, he noticed that his friends weren''t alone. "Hey, who''s that?" he asked, indicating the man tied up by Nick.

    "Oh, him? This is Biff, he''s going to guide us to the island where they took our friends. Isn''t that right Biff?" Nick asked, giving the man a smile that was in no way friendly.

    "Um, actually, my name is-"

    Nick cocked the hammer of his pistol, his smile turning even more icy. "Your name is Biff."

    "Uh, yup, that''s right. I''m Biff, and I''ll be happy to take you guys to the Bear King!" he shouted, sweat dripping from his brow in rivulets. He glanced over at the remains of his crewmates, knowing that if he didn''t cooperate, he would be joining them.

    Everyone but Luffy looked a little afraid at this interaction. "Really? Hey, that''s nice of you," Luffy said with a grin, while "Biff" just laughed nervously.

    "Zoro, what the hell happened out here?" Usopp asked, whispering to the swordsman.

    "Let''s just say I''m glad he''s on our side," Zoro said, giving Usopp the side eye. This confused him a bit, until he saw four bodies, all tied up and all with pieces of their head missing.

    Like they were shot.

    Usopp stared at the seemingly innocuous man, smiling happily with Luffy, feeling a cold bead of sweat drip down the back of his neck. He might be the most pirate-like out of all of them.

    While the brown haired man''s ruthlessness surprised him a bit, Zoro wasn''t worried about him turning on them. Not after taking that attack from Sham, the one aimed for his back. He''d just need to watch and make sure he didn''t go too far.

    Merry then informed them that his ship was anchored down at the shipyard. Nick idly wondered why it was never attacked, but suspected the reason was to frame him. After all, if every other ship was being burned down except for his, it wouldn''t be difficult to convince the villagers of his guilt, not after the trauma of the night.

    So the group of six began making their way to the shipyard once again, with Usopp only having to retrieve Zoro twice. The guy may have been strong as hell, but at what cost?

    But what really surprised them was Luffy, whose body had returned to normal by the time they reached their destination. They couldn''t help but wonder what kind of body he has. Sure it was rubber, but that didn''t explain what they just saw.

    Once they arrived at the shipyard, they saw everyone from the village had gathered there behind makeshift barricades, holding various weapons like before. Only this time it seemed as if they also had some guns and actual swords, likely looted from the pirates killed in town.

    "Halt, who goes there!?" yelled one of the sentries, and they saw several guns being pointed at them. Usopp raised his hands in fright, screaming like a little girl, but the rest of them remained calm.

    "Orin, is that you? It''s me, Merry. Would you kindly let us through," asked the butler. The group felt themselves get lit up by torchlights as they were taken stock of.

    "Well I''ll be. Thought you were dead. And is that Usopp I see? Glad you''re alright lad. Come right round this way, we''ll see to ya," he said, indicating a spot to the left where there was some sort of gate. They pulled it open and the group walked inside.

    "Thank you very much Orin. How are you? Not hurt I hope?" Merry asked as they entered the camp.

    "I''m doing alright. A few scrapes but nothing life threatening. Who are they?" he asked, looking pointedly at Luffy, Zoro, Nick and the tied up Biff.

    "They''re the one responsible for driving those despicable pirates out of town. I don''t suppose you can point in the direction of Dr. Shingo, can you?" Mery asked. Nick, and to a lesser extent Zoro, needed treatment before they sailed after their friends.

    Orin scratched his chin in thought, before pointing to a building in the distance. "Yeah, he should be right over there. Doubt you''ll miss it, Doc''s been real busy tonight," Orin said.

    "I can only imagine," Merry said, looking around the camp sadly. Their village was relatively small, so he knew every single one of these people to some extent, and it broke his heart to see them in such a state.

    He felt a hand on his shoulder, startling him a bit. Turning around to see who it was, he saw Nick giving him a serious, yet empathetic look. "I know it''s rough Merry, but they''re alive. Take solace in that," he said.

    Merry felt his eyes tear up at that, wiping them off with a handkerchief. "Yes, you are absolutely right. The town can be rebuilt, but lives lost can never be reclaimed. We''ll get through this."

    The group then made their way towards Dr. Shingo, hoping he wasn''t so busy he couldn''t treat their injuries.

    Is it wrong that Nick was hoping for some killer pain relievers?

    Once they got there, the good doctor was only too happy to treat them, remembering Nick and Zoro from when they ran off after dumping Pett on him. But there was someone there that Nick did not expect to see, and that was Mary.

    "Nick, it''s you!" she shouted, a great big smile on her face as she ran up and latched herself to him. Nick made a quiet grunt as he returned the hug, trying not to show how much pain he was in from being hugged by a little girl.

    "Hey Mary. What are you doing here?" Nick asked, as Mary raised her head to look at him.

    "I''m helping Dr. Shingo with his patients!" she declared with a big, proud smile, before she finally seemed to notice his injuries. "What happened to you!? You look all beat up!"

    Nick chuckled and patted her head, making her swipe at his hand with a pout. "I''m alright, squirt, just a bit banged up. Nothin that can''t be fixed," he said, making her sag in relief.

    "I''ll be the judge of that young man. Now, let me get a look at ya," Shingo said gruffly, dark circles under his eyes. But no matter how tired he was or how deep the exhaustion set in, he was this town''s doctor, and he would be damned if he didn''t do everything he could do to fulfill his duty.

    Nick sighed but did as the doctor ordered. It took him a while, but eventually Nick was let go. The disinfectant hurt like a bitch, and the bandages were all itchy, but he was deemed good enough.

    He hoped he wouldn''t hear that from Nami after making love to her.

    Next it was Zoro''s turn, who tried to turn down the help. But when the doctor told him to, "Sit down and shut up," he begrudgingly complied, grumbling the whole time. Once he was cleared to leave, all that was left was to find Luffy and get to the Going Merry. Saying goodbye to Mary and thanking the doctor, they did just that.

    Luckily, he wasn''t very far, having decided to go and bother Pett. The others were happy to see the old shipbuilder alive and kicking, and just as ornery as ever. They spoke to him for a few minutes before taking their leave, following Merry to where he kept his ship anchored.

    It was on a private dock on the north end of the shipyard. Luffy''s eyes sparkled as he took it in, and it was all Nick could do to not be overwhelmed by the feeling of nostalgia it brought on.

    "This is the Going Merry. She''s a bit of an older model, but she sails like a dream. You won''t find a better ship in all the East Blue," Merry said proudly, and Nick believed him completely.

    "Hey Merry. It''s nice to finally meet you," Nick whispered, staring right at the sheep figurehead in the front. It might have just been his imagination, but he couldn''t help but feel like the Going Merry responded.

    "Nice to meet you too! Are you ready to set sail?"

 Chapter 36

    Nick thought that his first experience traveling on the Going Merry would be¡­ different. However, as it turns out, trying to pilot a ship with four people who have no goddamn idea how to do so was less than ideal.

    They nearly steered it right into the island after taking it out of port. Now that would have been embarrassing. Thankfully, Nick took the whipstaff from Luffy and managed to redirect it right in the nick of time.

    After that, the rubber troublemaker found his seat almost immediately, sitting happily on the figurehead as the rest of them attempted to work. Or at least, Nick and Usopp did, because that lazy asshole Zoro decided to take a cat nap.

    Twice!

    But Nick was basically held together by duct tape at this point, so he wasn''t much use. About the only thing he could do was steer the ship. Usopp was forced to do the rest of the things needed to make the thing move, and though he was a decent shipwright, that didn''t necessarily translate to knowing how to make the ship go. He had the theoretical knowledge, but no practical experience.

    The only one who did have an idea was Biff, and they sure as hell weren''t going to give him free reign of anything. The last thing they needed was for him to sabotage their journey. Just because Nick put the fear of God into him, didn''t mean he wouldn''t do something incredibly stupid.

    As it was, he was nice and tied up, sitting against the wall watching the chaos unfold. According to him, their destination was two days away, and those pricks had several hours on them already. Hopefully nothing would happen to their friends before they could reach them.

    The first day of the journey wasn''t so bad. Even if they didn''t know what the hell they were doing, the weather was nice, with a few fluffy white clouds passing them by across the otherwise blue sky.

    But then everything changed when the Fire Nation attacked.

    "Who the hell are these guys!?" Usopp shouted in fear as a cannonball exploded near them. Nick cursed as he snapped the whipstaff to the left, barely avoiding a direct hit.

    "They must be more of the Bear King''s crew! Guess he doesn''t want us to crash the party!" Nick yelled, doing his best to prevent them from meeting Davy Jones. It was hard to tell from the room he was in, and he cursed whoever decided that the mechanism to steer the boat was put inside a freaking room where you couldn''t see shit!

    Seriously, why!? What benefit could that possibly have? It should be out on the deck where he could actually see what was going on. But no, that would make too much sense!

    Nick could barely make out Luffy as he kicked away a cannonball from his perch. Nice to know at least one of them was doing their job, unlike the coward and the narcoleptic.

    "Wah, we''re all gonna die!" the coward yelled, as the ship was rocked by another violent explosion. Somehow, the narcoleptic slept through the whole damn thing. Nick didn''t know how that was possible, but the proof was right in front of him. Zoro was sleeping as snug as a bug in a rug, his body sliding back and forth across the room as Nick desperately steered them as best he could.

    "Damn it Usopp, now is not the time to let your inner bitch out!" Nick yelled, grunting in pain as he moved the whipstaff to the right. A day was not nearly enough rest time for his poor broken ribs to recover, especially when he and Usopp were the only ones that could be trusted to steer Merry.

    "What did you say!?" Usopp yelled in anger, glaring at Nick before another explosion nearly sent him sprawling on his ass.

    "This is bad. What are we going to do?" Usopp cried, holding onto the dining table for dear life, forgetting his anger at Nick.

    "Stop your damn crying and wake up sleeping beauty!" Nick shouted, watching with irritation as Zoro slid by him again.

    "How am I supposed to do that?" Usopp asked.

    "Slap him in the face, kick him in the balls; I don''t know just figure something out!"

    Frowning, Usopp considered his options. He really wasn''t sure how he was supposed to wake up someone who could sleep through the literal apocalypse. But he knew Nick was right, they needed him in order to survive their current predicament. Luffy could only do so much.

    So that only leaves the how. Zoro, in the very short time he has known him, has shown to be a highly aggressive and violent person, and personally, Usopp did not want to find out how violent he could be when awoken from his beauty sleep.

    It''s just too bad he didn''t have a choice. But even if that was the case, he sure as hell wasn''t going to get near him while doing it. He was a sniper! Getting all up in someone''s face was the exact opposite of what he was supposed to do.

    Looking through his satchel, he tried to find something that he could use to wake him up without doing any damage that would prevent him from fighting. That would defeat the whole purpose of getting his lazy ass up.

    That''s when he saw it, a stink bomb. These little babies were pretty potent, and was what he used to subdue the bees he used for the traps. If it was good enough to make bees, the most evil insect in the world, play nice, then it was good enough to wake up Zoro.

    Or kill him, but Usopp was ready and willing for that coin toss.

    Hopefully he wouldn''t be too mad. And if he was, he could always say it was Nick''s idea. Not technically a lie, as he did tell him to wake the other man up, he would just omit the part where he made the executive decision to use a stink bomb.

    Grabbing the wake up pellet and sliding it into the slingshot pouch, he took careful aim, not wanting to hit Zoro in any delicate spots. His brother already did that once.

    "Alright Zoro, time to wake up! Special Attack: Funky Sta-ah!"

    Just as Usopp was about to unleash his attack, the ship gave another shuddering jerk as Nick tried to avoid another cannonball. The explosion rocked the ship once more, sending the sniper''s attack wide. Not only that, the long nosed man went flying forward, his head colliding with Zoro''s.

    "Gah!" Zoro yelled out in surprise, holding his forehead in pain. "What the hell Usopp!?" he growled, grabbing the barely conscious man by his shirt, glaring at him.

    "Look at the pretty stars¡­" Usopp said in mild delirium, Zoro''s extra hard head having knocked the sense right out of him.

    "Tsk," Zoro said, flinging him to the ground. This process, while only mildly painful, did have the good fortune of bringing Usopp back to his senses.

    "Huh, what happened, where am I?" he said, looking around in confusion. The last thing he remembered was trying to wake up Zoro, the ship shook and then¡­ blank. Looking up, he saw the grumpy face of Zoro, glaring down at him, and he figured that whatever happened, he succeeded in his mission to wake up the swordsman.

    "Well look at that, Sleeping Beauty finally woke up. And it didn''t even require a kiss," Nick said, smirking as Zoro turned his glare on him.

    "What was that?"

    "Bitch at me later Mr. Sourpuss, right now I need you to go out there and help Luffy. In case you didn''t know, we''re kind of under attack right now," Nick ordered. Zoro looked out the open door, watching as Luffy inflated himself to try and send a cannonball back at the attackers.

    "What a pain," Zoro groused, but did as he was told, sliding his swords into his haramaki and walking casually out the door, unbothered by the manic movement of the boat. But Nick didn''t have time to admire the badassness of the scene, turning to look at Usopp who was still on the ground.

    "Good job Usopp, now for your next assignment. I need you to man the cannons below deck and take out as many of these assholes as you can. Got it?" Nick said, grunting as he once more maneuvered the whipstaff.

    "What, why me!?" Usopp cried, fear in his eyes. As much as he wanted to be a brave pirate, his first real taste of naval warfare had him shook. But more than that, he was afraid of screwing up. What if he missed, and that caused them to sink? The pressure was just too much!

    "You''re the sniper, aren''t you? So snipe them! The more of them you take out, the safer we''ll be. So put on your big boy panties, and take them out! Or do you not want to save Kaya and your brother?" Nick asked, gritting his teeth from the sheer agony in his ribs. He had to force each and every breath of air, the simple act more painful than getting his ribs broken in the first place.

    Usopp stared at him for a moment, seeing the torture in the other man''s eyes as he did everything withing his power to keep them alive. No, it was more than that. It wasn''t just about survival, it was about saving the others.

    Saving Nami.

    He was going through unimaginable pain in order to save the woman he clearly had his eyes on. How could Usopp, who claimed to care for Kaya, do any different? The short answer is, he couldn''t.

    Wiping the tears of fear from his eyes, he gave Nick a determined nod. "Alright, I''ll do it. Just try to line me up, and I''ll take them down."

    The brown haired man smirked at the sudden bravery. "I''ll do my best. Now get down there."

    Nick watched as Usopp ran out of the room, heading for the lower deck. Now that everyone was doing their part, they just might make it out of this alive.

    And that''s when a sudden, putrid smell entered his nose. "Ugh, what the hell is that?" he asked, looking around for whatever was making the smell. It was like every fart ever made was let out at once while two skunks hate fucked each other.

    That''s when he spotted good old Biff, completely knocked out and foaming at the mouth. He could practically see the stink lines coming off of him. He was confused for a moment, until he remembered the pellet that Usopp was trying to wake Zoro up with.

    A case of theft: this story is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.

    "Damn it Usopp! You killed Biff!" Nick yelled. How the hell was something so vile supposed to wake up the green haired swordsman? And even if it did, what was stopping it from knocking him right back out? Then it would have been Zoro foaming at the mouth with his soul leaving his body.

    Thankfully, that didn''t happen, and Zoro was outside deflecting giant lead explodey balls away from Merry. He couldn''t exactly return fire like Luffy could, but it was enough that he was on defense.

    Nick swerved Merry so that he was facing one of the ships head on, knowing they had a cannon in the front. There was also one on each side and one in the back as well. Hopefully, Usopp was in position and he wouldn''t chicken out at the last second.

    To his relief, he didn''t. Nick heard the loud explosion of the cannon go off, and he could see the lead ball racing towards the much larger ships. Too bad for them, they didn''t have a Luffy or a Zoro, and the ball connected dead on.

    Say what you want about Usopp''s cowardice, the boy could aim.

    "Woo, bullseye!" Usopp shouted, his face twisted in glee. His hands were as sweaty as they''d ever been, but he couldn''t remember the last time he felt so accomplished.

    The ship immediately began taking on water. He couldn''t see the crew from here, but he imagined they were screaming in panic. The thought filled him with joy.

    "Heh, not bad," Zoro said with a smirk. Luffy laughed happily, watching as their opponent was taken out. "Woo, Usopp! Way to go!" he shouted. He was already thinking of adding the long nosed man to his crew, and that just cemented it. Neither he nor Zoro were snipers of any kind, and he could really use one. He saw how good Usopp''s dad was with a gun, and that''s the kind of skill he wanted for a member of his crew.

    Their celebration was cut short by another explosion shaking the ship, nearly sending Luffy to the floor. He looked out at the numerous pirate ships that were even more eager for blood than before.

    "Maa, so many¡­" he complained.

    "Oi, you two! Get back to work!" Nick shouted from inside.

    "I don''t take orders from you!" Zoro shouted back.

    "Luffy, tell Zoro to get back to work!"

    "Zoro, get back to work."

    "Grr¡­"

    The four of them worked in tandem to protect the Merry while making their way towards wherever it was they were going. But there never seemed to be an end to them. Nick could have sworn it was some Don guy who had the most ships in the East Blue, so who the hell was this guy?

    Panting in exhaustion, Nick did his best to keep going, staring out from the open door into the sea in front of them. Usopp fired off another shot, managing to hit another ship. It didn''t do enough damage to take it out, but it would slow them down.

    It wasn''t looking good, there were just too many of them for one crew of four to handle. But what choice did they have? If they couldn''t break through this blockade, they had no hope of saving their friends.

    That''s when he heard an ominous rumbling sound. If he didn''t know any better, he''d say it was thunder. As if to confirm his notion, a loud boom echoed across the sea.

    "Well, that''s less than ideal¡­" he thought.

    Luffy kicked away another cannonball, landing on the deck of the ship breathing somewhat heavily. As much stamina as he had, jumping up and down while constantly using his Devil Fruit powers really took it out of him.

    A sharp breeze nearly took his hat off, making him slam his right hand onto it. The ship also shook from a violent wave as the sky roared above them. Looking to the right, Luffy could see pitch black clouds gathering in the distance, racing towards them with a wrathful glee.

    "Damn it, just what we need. Oi, no-ribs! Get us out of here!" Zoro shouted to Nick, having seen and heard the storm. Nick couldn''t agree more. Going through a storm is the last thing he wanted to do.

    But just as he was about to swivel in the opposite direction and hope they could sail around it somehow, Luffy stopped him.

    "No wait!" he said, staring out at the dark horizon. His eyes were unfocused, like he was listening to something only he could hear. "Keep going. Right through the center of the storm."

    "Are you out of your mind!?" Zoro yelled as the waves grew even more violent. The storm may have been some ways away, but they could clearly feel the effects of its power from here.

    "Trust me. Merry can handle it," he said, giving Zoro a hard stare. This continued for a moment before Zoro huffed and turned away.

    "Fine, but if we die, you''re dead," he said, making Luffy confused as all hell.

    "That''s what dying means Zoro!" Nick shouted from the peanut gallery, having been able to somehow hear everything. He chalked it up to another one of those anime things.

    "Nobody asked you!" Zoro yelled back, his cheeks red from embarrassment.

    Nick chuckled before doing as Luffy suggested, turning the whipstaff directly towards the storm. He wasn''t sure if this was a particularly good idea, but he''d put his faith in the power of the anime protagonist.

    "Alright, you guys need to bring up the sails! Chop-chop, on the double!" Nick shouted with a grin. Luffy sprang into action immediately while Zoro continued to bitch for a bit.

    "Don''t take orders from you¡­" he grumbled under his breath. Still, he did as he was told, if for no other reason than he knew Nick was right. He might not know much about sailing, but he knew having the sails down in a storm was a bad idea.

    "Hey, what the hell is going on! Why are we heading right for the storm!?" Usopp shouted, having come up from below deck after seeing the direction we were turning.

    "Luffy''s idea! But don''t worry! If we die, then we''re dead!"

    "What the hell does that mean!?"

    "Ask Zoro!"

    "Mommy, I don''t want to be a pirate anymore!" thought Biff, who just woke up.

    It didn''t take long for them to furl the sails, which was a good thing because it didn''t take long to reach the storm either. The Going Merry tipped right and left in massive arcs as they sailed over giant waves. The sight of lightning striking around them was their only source of light beneath the darkened sky.

    Nick did his best to keep Merry from capsizing, with the help of Usopp, both of them using all their power to control the whipstaff. Luffy and Zoro were busy doing the same, using their superior strength to slam the boat in the opposite direction when the ship tilted too far right or left.

    Water poured in from the door, slamming into Nick and Usopp, nearly sending them to the ground. But they held firm, gripping the whipstaff and keeping them on course. Calling it difficult would be an understatement, but both men were determined to save the women they cared for.

    It was pure chaos, but somehow, they managed to pull through. After what felt like hours, they finally made it out of the other side of the storm. Bright, sunny light steamed down from the heavens, almost as if the storm had never happened. Merry sailed merrily across the now calm ocean waves.

    "We''re alive!" Usopp shouted, collapsing on the floor, tears of relief pouring from his eyes. Nick similarly fell to the ground, though unlike Usopp, he wasn''t bawling his eyes out. He was just so damn tired.

    "Zoro, Luffy! You dead!?" Nick called out, wondering how the two fared as they were the ones outside in the heat of the storm.

    "Fuck off!" replied an exhausted Zoro.

    "I''m hungry¡­"

    "Ok good, they''re fine," he said, laying his head against the cold, wet floor. That had been an experience he hadn''t been prepared for. A terrifying one to boot. Probably the closest he''s come to death so far, and that''s saying something.

    Nick heard some footsteps approaching and managed to raise his weary head to get a good look at a waterlogged Zoro dragging an equally waterlogged Luffy behind him. Zoro let Luffy go before flopping onto his ass and leaning back against the wall.

    "Are we still being followed? Please say no," Nick asked/begged. He was way too exhausted to be dealing with any more crap at the moment.

    "Not that I can see. Pretty sure they all sunk in the storm," Zoro responded before yawning.

    "Good. Can''t believe that actually worked. Hope sailing into a storm doesn''t become a habit¡­" Nick muttered. But Zoro didn''t respond, too busy sleeping. Nick sweat dropped at this.

    "How? How can he fall asleep so easily?"

    But it seemed like he wasn''t the only one, as Usopp and Luffy also seemed to be zonked out. Nick couldn''t really blame them, everyone had been up for well over a day at this point. Well, except for Zoro that is. And as much as he wanted to pursue the captors, catching up to them would be pointless if they were too tired to fight.

    But he had no intention of sleeping on the ground, his back would never forgive him for it. So, with a painful grunt, he forced himself to his feet to stand on shaky legs. He looked over towards Biff, who was also out cold again and still tied up nice and tight. Good, it would do for them to get killed in their sleep by a second rate guy like him.

    Nick slowly made his way out of the room, taking special care not to step on anybody. He made his way to the front of the ship to release the anchor. He did not want to let the ship drift wherever the hell it pleased. Navigating was hard enough when you knew where you were going, doing so while lost and without a Nami to guide them was not something Nick was keen to experience.

    Grunting, he removed the anchor from the hook before tossing it into the ocean, watching as it quickly disappeared below the depths. Nodding in satisfaction, he then headed right for the Captain''s quarters, or the ladies quarters, as they would be called later.

    He was not sleeping in a hammock when there was a perfectly good bed available. No siree.

    The trip down the stairs into the lower deck wasn''t what he would call pleasant. Each step was way too damn difficult. Gunshot wounds, cat wounds, Luffy wounds; all of them conspired to send him to the floor. But Nick was on to their conspiracy and managed to make it down safely.

    When he flopped down on the bed, he made a moaning sound that would not be out of place in a porno. Too bad he was way too tired to get anything up, and even if he could, he''d just be frustrated that he couldn''t do anything about it, cause he sure as shit wasn''t moving.

    He listened to the gentle waves outside as they gently rocked him to sleep. Tomorrow they should be able to reach the island, but for now, it was time for bed. It didn''t take too long before he was dozing off.

    *Line Break*

    Honey Queen stared at the unresponsive Den Den Mushi with a frown. Their fleet had been chasing the Straw Hats when they ran afoul a storm. According to the last reports sent, the fools sailed right into it.

    Well, at least that was one problem taken care of. The ship they were on was supposedly tiny, no way it survived the storm when their large galleons didn''t.

    Placing the receiver back on the snail, she strolled towards her chambers, eager to deliver the good news to their prisoners. They had been irritatingly uncooperative during their first day of their journey, and this should be just the thing that gets them to comply.

    "Knock, knock, is anybody home?" she asked, knocking on her own door before opening it. There she saw both Nami and Kaya, tied up and glaring at her. The orange haired girl''s stare was mildly effective, but Kaya''s just made her look like an angry little kitten. More adorable than intimidating.

    "What do you want now? Here to ask for more advice on which outfit to wear? Newsflash, they all make you look like a slut," Nami said, practically spitting the words out. Not for the first time did Honey Queen wish that hypnotist hadn''t passed out due to his injuries. It would be so much better if these two little tramps were quiet.

    "Not this time, but don''t worry, I have plenty more clothes to go through when we get to the island," she said, smirking as Nami groaned in irritation. "No, I''m here to inform you that your friends are sadly no longer part of this world. Seems they perished in a storm."

    "No¡­" Kaya said, tears welling up in her eyes. Usopp couldn''t really be dead, could he? And the others; could they really be dead because of her?

    "Bullshit. Like I''d believe anything you have to say," Nami countered, but there was a noticeable wobble in her voice, causing Honey Queen to give her a cruel smirk.

    "You don''t have to trust my words; you''ll find out soon enough. I''m sure by your honeymoon you''ll come to realize that no one is coming to save you."

    With that, Honey Queen left, leaving two distraught women behind. Nami turned to look at the despairing Kaya, trying to snap her out of her own head. But no matter what she said, Kaya just continued staring at the ground, tears falling from her eyes.

    The cat burglar, growing sick of this, decided to get her attention in a different way.

    "Ow!"

    She head butted her. It was something Nick would have done and she felt very stupid for thinking emulating him would be a good idea.

    "Nami, that hurt. Why would you do that?" Kaya asked, crying for a whole new reason now.

    "Because you wouldn''t answer me. Ah, that stings," Nami complained. She would love to rub her now sore head, but with them being tied up, that wasn''t exactly in the cards at the moment.

    "Listen, don''t listen to a thing she said. No way something as simple as a storm would take those guys out, trust me," Nami said, giving her a smile, one that Kaya didn''t return.

    "But what if she was telling the truth? What if they are really dead? It would be all my fault," Kaya said, sniffling.

    "Are we doing this again? Nothing that''s happened is your fault. All the blame lies with them," Nami replied.

    "But-"

    "No buts! The boys are fine and we''ll be out of this soon enough. So stop crying and believe in them, alright?"

    "I''ll try," Kaya said, but it was hard for her to stop crying once she started. Her mind would keep going back to the thing that made her cry in the first place and play it on repeat, making her cry all over again. It was a vicious cycle.

    "Good. But just so you know, I''m not into the whole damsel in distress thing, so I don''t intend to wait around forever. First chance we get, we bust out of here. What do you say?" Nami asked, giving the slightly younger woman a confident grin.

    Seeing this, Kaya was able to dry the last of her tears, giving Nami a hopefully confident look as well. "Right, let''s do it!"

 Chapter 37

    The Bear King had many titles to his name. Tyrant, monster, pirate, smoopy pie; the last one was his from his mother. But the one thing he wished to be called more than anything else, is husband.

    Pin Joker watched as his boss paced back and forth, biting his nails in worry. The man was massive, with a capital M. Standing around 15 feet tall, he was a towering mass of flesh and hair.

    Because the Bear King was very, very hairy.

    His face wasn''t what one would call handsome, or even pleasant, but anyone with the balls to point that out would soon find themselves without. The large man did not take kindly to those who pointed out his flaws.

    His many, many flaws.

    His hair was black and scraggly, looking like you might cut yourself if you gave him a head pat, and his beard didn''t look any better. His nose was bulbous, and his chin was big and square and covered in patchy hair.

    He wore a brightly colored blue shirt adorned with images of card suits. Hearts, spades, diamonds, and clubs, covering the entire thing like a checkerboard. Over top this he wore a large, furry vest, likely made out of his namesake, a bear. His pants were a dark red, held up by an orange sash.

    "Where are they, where are they¡­" he mumbled to himself as he paced about the room. "They should have been here by now, shouldn''t they? Do you think something happened? Is my bride ok?"

    "I''m sure they''re fine, sir. You''ve been up all night, perhaps you should get some rest?" suggested PIn Joker. Said man was dressed similarly to a circus performer, looking like he belonged more with Buggy than the Bear King.

    His dark hair was slicked back with so much gel it might have become permanent. While not nearly as ugly as his boss, he certainly wouldn''t be winning any beauty pageants. His face was angular, with a red, heart shaped tattoo covering his left eye and a teardrop one below his right. A scar ran across his face, going from his left temple, between his eyes, and reaching the right side of his jaw.

    His clothing consisted of a fancy, purple suit covered with diamond shapes. Over top he wore a red cape, with a circle of yellow fur going around his neck. On his waist he carried a long, thin rapier.

    "No, not until I know my beloved is ok. Oh, where are they," he whined, continuing his pacing. Pin Joker sighed, watching the distraught man wear a groove into the floor. Most times he was decidingly ruthless, but when it came to romance, he was a blubbering mess.

    "Puru-puru-puru-puru¡­ puru-puru-puru-puru¡­ puru-puru-puru-puru."

    The two turned to the sound of the Den-Den Mushi, staring at it. Neither one moved for a minute, just watching the thing ring, over and over again.

    "You get it, Pin Joker, I''m too nervous," ordered the Bear King. With a sigh, the clown based pirate did just that, picking up the receiver.

    "Ka-Lick."

    "Hello, this is Pin Joker."

    "Ah, Jokey, so good to hear your voice. This is Honey Queen," said the voice on the other line, sounding way too chipper for the time of day it was.

    "Ah Honey Queen, we were wondering where you were. I trust everything is in order?" he asked, shooing away the Bear King who had bent down near his head to listen.

    "Of course, no problems here. Sorry for the delay, we ran into a bit of trouble. But we''ll be there soon," she cooed, making Pin Joker''s skin crawl. He couldn''t stand that sickly sweet voice she used, not when he knew her true nature. She and the Bear King were a lot alike in that regard.

    "Good, good. Big brother was getting nervous. If you wouldn''t mind putting his mind at ease?" he asked, staring at the massive man who was staring at him with large, hopeful eyes.

    "Of course, put him on," Honey Queen said. Pin Joker held out the receiver for the Bear King to take, who eagerly snatched it up.

    "Honey, how is she? Is my bride ok? Please tell me she''s ok," he begged, tears forming in his eyes, making Pin Joker roll his own. He didn''t understand why they were so obsessed with romance. It boggled the mind.

    "She''s right as rain Kingy, no problems here. And she''s quite eager to meet you," Honey Queen lied. Not that she had any intention of telling him that.

    "Oh that makes me so happy. Please hurry, I don''t know how much longer I can take," he pleaded.

    "We''re heading up the elevator now, so we''ll be there soon enough. Just hang tight. Oh, and before I forget, I got you a little something special as well," she said, making the man''s face light up.

    "Oh, a present, for me!? You know how I love gifts," he grinned.

    "Of course, and I''m sure you''ll love what I picked out for you," she giggled, turning to look at said gift, who was currently trying to kill her with a glare. If only looks could kill.

    "Well, don''t keep me waiting! What is it!?" he asked, or more like, begged.

    "Ah, ah, ah. You''ll just have to wait, mister," she said like she was talking to a child. "But I promise, it''ll be worth it."

    The Bear King''s face lit up with delight, tossing away the Den-Den Mushi as he started to dance around the room. Seeing this, Pin Joker frantically went to catch the poor thing, sighing in relief once he did so.

    These snails weren''t cheap.

    "And there he goes. We''ll see you when you get here," he said, getting a chuckle from the woman.

    "Roger that. See you soon, Jokey!" she said cheerfully, hanging up the phone.

    "Ka-Lick."

    She turned to face the two women, who were still glaring daggers at her. Well one was, the other still hadn''t mastered the angry face yet.

    "Well, our big brother sure is excited to meet you," she said, with a condescending sneer.

    "I hate to tell you this, but the feeling''s not mutual," Nami growled. But Honey Queen simply chuckled, giving the sexy ginger a pitying, yet smug look.

    "Well, I wouldn''t tell him that. He doesn''t take rejection well. Who knows what he''ll do to you if that happens," Honey Queen said.

    "She''s right, you know, my ladies. Big brother has a few, shall we say, insecurities. Best not to poke at them," stated Skunk One. He sat at a table, sipping on a cup of tea, trying to look posh and sophisticated. Too bad he was dressed as a steampunk skunk, ruining the whole image.

    "Or what?" Nami asked.

    "Or he might just throw you off the island entirely. It''s quite a long way down, so I wouldn''t recommend it," Skunk One replied with a grin. But his tone suggested he would enjoy watching them fall to their deaths.

    "Gee, thanks for your concern," Nami shot back sarcastically.

    "If you''re really unlucky, he''ll give you to Boo Jack," he said. Nami turned to look at the large, rotund man, following the blonde haired slut around with his tongue out, looking like a horny puppy that would start humping her leg any minute now.

    "I''d rather be thrown from the island," she said with a shudder.

    Kuro watched the whole exchange with a sneer. Hopefully he wouldn''t have to suffer these fools long and he could get back to building up his wealth. The company may have taken a hit, but he was confident he could smooth things over with their customer base. Just having him in charge rather than a girl barely into her adulthood should be enough to ease many of their concerns.

    It''s a seed he planted quite a while ago, after all, and he''s been carefully tending to the buds ever since. He needed them worried about her taking over so there would be a feeling of relief when he usurped her. That way they would be eager to stick around.

    "What are you thinking so hard about, Puddin?" Honey Queen asked, sauntering over to him. He cast a glance in her direction while adjusting his glasses.

    "My future plans, if you must know."

    "Oh, and do those plans include little old me?" she asked, placing her hands behind her back and pushing out her bust, shaking her chest in an attempt to tantalize him. But much to her chagrin, he barely gave them a glance.

    "Perhaps¡­" he stated, making her face light up. Of course, he was lying through his teeth, but he couldn''t afford to antagonize the woman just yet. He''ll likely have to arrange an accident at some point, just so he didn''t have some psychotic woman coming after him. He was thinking¡­ shipwreck. What better way to get rid of a Logia user?

    "Oh, Puddin, you make me so happy," she smiled, clinging onto his arm. He could only stand there and groan, having no choice but to wait until the elevator brought them to the top of the island.

    As loath as he was to admit it, the feat of engineering was a marvel to behold. Not only was the island nearly a mile into the air, but the mechanism that brought the whole ship up was quite the sight. He would say it offered some protection, but all one would have to do was shoot the shaft leading up with a cannon or two and the whole thing would collapse, and the island would fall to the sea.

    Unauthorized duplication: this narrative has been taken without consent. Report sightings.

    So while it was impressive, he also saw it as a waste of time.

    It took nearly 30 minutes for them to reach the top, their ship sailing out of the chamber and into a small port. To reach the Bear King''s castle, they would have to walk through town, something that none of them in particular wanted to do.

    "Come on you three. And don''t even think about escaping," Honey Queen threatened, giving Nami and Kaya a pointed look.

    "How can we when you have us chained up?" Nami asked sarcastically, holding up her hands which had shackles made of honey keeping them together. Not only that, but her feet were shackled too, connected by a chain that would make running rather difficult.

    "Of course, silly me," Honey Queen giggled, making Nami mutter, "Bitch," under her breath. But if the older woman heard her, she gave no indication.

    The group left the ship, walking off of a large wooden plank. Nami and Kaya stared at the town in wonder, especially at all the wind-up windmills. The buildings were mostly shaped like spiraling towers, and none of them appeared straight, each of them misshapen in some way.

    As they made their way through the town, Nami took special notice that no one seemed to be up and about. It reminded her of Orange Town with how desolate it was. She didn''t have a hard time at all believing pirates took it over.

    "How are you, Akisu? Are you doing alright?" Nami heard from beside her. She turned and saw Kaya staring at the boy with worry. He took a few good hits while trying to keep them safe, and Nami felt a pang of guilt at not thinking about him more.

    But he didn''t look like he was in pain. Or at least, not much pain. He was staring at the town in wonder, not that she could blame him. They were practically in the clouds after all.

    "I''m fine Kaya, it''s just¡­ Everything looks so familiar," he said, his voice carrying a hint of longing to it.

    "Do you think this is where you''re from?" Kaya asked gently, getting Nami''s attention.

    "Hang on, I thought he was Usopp''s brother?" she asked, confused. Akisu nodded, though he wasn''t paying her much attention.

    "I am, but not by blood. Usopp took me in when I washed up on shore a few years ago, but I''m not from Syrup village. I don''t know where I''m from¡­" he said sadly. Nami could certainly relate to that, having an adopted sibling and having no idea where you came from.

    She placed her hand on his head, which was a bit awkward given the fact that she was chained up. He looked up at her, surprised, and she gave him a warm smile in return. "I know what that''s like, I have an adopted sibling too. Her name is Nojiko. For the longest time, I wondered where I came from as well, wondered if there wasn''t somewhere else I belonged, but you know what?"

    "What?" he asked, thoroughly invested in the story. And he wasn''t the only one either, with Kaya laser focused on her as well. Girl really loved her stories.

    "Turns out, I was right where I belonged the whole time. With people who love me. So even if you are from here, the place you belong is where there are people who love you, no matter what," she said.

    Akisu stared at her for a moment before his eyes gained a determined, happy look to them. "Yeah, you''re right! My home is Syrup Village!"

    "That a boy," she said, ruffling his hair. But of course, the moment was ruined by a certain blonde haired bitch.

    "Aw, isn''t that touching? Well I''m sorry to say that you belong to the Bear King now. This is your new home."

    Nami glared at the woman again, "Would you mind your own business you hag!"

    "Hag!? How dare you! I am the pinnacle of youthful beauty. You''re just jealous that your tits are already starting to sag!"

    "Excuse me!? My tits are full and perky, thank you very much. Don''t project your insecurities onto me!"

    "I''m not the one who''s insecure here you little whore!"

    "Oh yeah!"

    "Yeah!"

    The group watching couldn''t help but sweat drop at the scene. "Um, should we do something?" asked Boo Jack.

    "Not if you wish to retain all of your fingers," Skunk One stated. Kuro ignored the screaming buffoons, continuing towards the castle. Not for the first time did he wish Jango was up and about. Hypnotizing these fools was looking more and more appealing.

    Nami and Honey Queen continued to exchange barbs with each other as they made their way towards their destination. They eventually came to a large, steel gate, guarded by dozens of men.

    "If you gents would be so kind as to open the gate, we would be ever so grateful," stated Skunk One, confusing the illiterate pirates for a moment. Once they figured out they wanted inside, they quickly opened the gate.

    Watching this from above was none other than the Bear King, who was growing more and more nervous with each passing second. The moment he laid eyes on Kaya, he swore his heart tried to leap out of his chest and run towards her.

    "Oh, there she is Joker! Quick, how do I look?" he asked. Once Honey Queen had told them that they were nearly there, he ran to his room, after dancing of course, to change into something more appropriate. He only really had the one outfit, but at least he was in a fresh one.

    "You cut a fine figure sir. She won''t be able to resist," Pin Joker said, barely even looking at the man. But his words caused a swell of confidence either way.

    "You''re right, of course. There''s no man as handsome as me. I have nothing to worry about," he said. The pair watched as the group walked across the courtyard, entering the castle.

    "Um, but are you sure?" the Bear King asked, making Pin Joker sigh.

    Nami, Kaya and Akisu stared at the surroundings with wonder. They were in a large circular room, made mostly out of stone. But that wasn''t what caught their attention. That honor belonged to the massive, screw-like object in the center of the room. It was probably 30 feet in diameter, and twisted slowly, the sound of a ticking clock echoing in the background.

    Beneath them, near the center of the room surrounding the screw, was a glass floor, dozens of feet thick. This allowed them to see the numerous gears all moving in tandem. Nami would be far more impressed with the sight if she hadn''t been kidnapped to see it.

    "Impressive isn''t it?" Honey Queen asked, giving them a smirk.

    "What the hell is it?" Nami asked.

    "Don''t worry, you''ll find it soon enough. Come along, we mustn''t keep big brother waiting," she said, heading for the stairs. Seeing this, Nami groaned in frustration.

    "Seriously, more walking? Couldn''t you have figured out a better way with all this technology you have?"

    "Now, now, no need to shout. Besides, walking is good for you, helps keep you from getting fat. And it looks like you could use all the help you can get," stated the blonde with a smirk.

    "Oh, that''s it! You''re dead!" Nami yelled, ready to charge right at her, only to be stopped by Kaya stepping in front of her.

    "Nami, please calm down," she said, making the ginger haired girl stop in her tracks.

    "But Kaya, she called me fat," Nami whined, glaring over Kaya''s shoulder at the smug looking woman.

    "I know, but we both know that''s not true, so there''s no reason to get upset," Kaya said, trying to soothe her friend.

    "I guess¡­"

    "No dallying fatty, we have places to be."

    "That''s it! Come here!"

    The men could only sigh in frustration at having to listen to more of the catfight. Even Boo Jack, the major simp general, was getting tired of it.

    After climbing up numerous flights of stairs, the group finally reached the top, where the Bear King was waiting. The two girls who were meant to be his brides gulped as the large, metal doors opened.

    And that''s when they saw him for the first time.

    "You''ve gotta be kidding me¡­" Nami said, staring at the enormous and unattractive man. He gave them a big smile, showing off his yellowing teeth.

    "Welcome my darling, to your new home! I hope the trip wasn''t an unpleasant one. And might I say, you look lovely in that dress," he shouted, making Kaya take a step back in fear. "U-um¡­" she stuttered, getting a look of confusion from the man.

    "Hmm, is something wrong? If there is, tell me so I can fix it. I want you to be happy you know," he said, laying it on way too thick for the girls'' taste, his honeyed words making them shudder in revulsion.

    "Oh, um¡­ no, I''m fine. Thank you for asking," Kaya managed to get out, only after Nami nudged her in the side.

    "Good, good. I want my wife to be happy. Ooh, I just love saying that. Wife. Eeehehe," he squealed. Nami turned to the others, an expression that clearly said, "Dafuq?" But they only shrugged in response, already used to the Bear King''s mannerisms.

    "Oh, and who is this you brought with you? I don''t remember inviting her to the wedding," Bear King said, staring at Nami. The navigator began to sweat a bit, now that the attention was on her. "Um¡­"

    "She''s my gift, brother dear. A second wife. Or mistress, if that appeals to you," sated Honey Queen. That caught his interest, staring at Nami with a new light.

    "Oh really. Well, let''s get a good look at you," he said, peering down at her with a contemplative look in his eyes. Nami did her best not to barf as his eyes lingered on her assets, wishing she had the foresight to change out of the little black dress she was wearing.

    This guy was not the man she wore it for.

    "Oh god why is this taking so long? Just stop staring at me already you creep!" Nami thought. But on the outside she could only give him a nervous smile, remembering the warning the blonde haired bimbo gave. She didn''t know if his ego was really that fragile, but considering he attacked an entire island when Kaya didn''t respond to his letter, she was leaning towards it was.

    "Hmm, yes¡­ I like her! Two wives! Could any man be so lucky?'' he stated, turning away from Nami, making her sigh in relief.

    "But we''ll need to make some adjustments to tonight''s ceremony. Is this what they call a double wedding?" he asked no one in particular. Nami wasn''t sure what to make of his enthusiasm, but he seemed surprisingly sincere.

    Which means she can use it against him. Nudging Kaya, she mouthed, "Follow my lead." Confused, but willing to trust her friend, she nodded.

    "I''m sorry, but did you say you want to get married tonight?" Nami asked, doing her best to act like she wanted to be there. The Bear King turned around, giving her a big, happy smile.

    "But of course! I simply can''t wait to be married. Why, is something the matter my sweet?" he asked, and Nami had to force down the vomit.

    "It''s just, Kaya and I are awfully tired from our journey. If we get married today, we won''t look our best. And you want us to look our best, don''t you?" she asked, fluttering her eyes at him, making his own turn to hearts.

    "Of course I do, pumpkin. But I don''t know if I can wait a whole, nother day," he complained.

    "I know, it''s hard. I can''t wait to be married to such a big¡­ strong man such as yourself. But a girl only gets one wedding day, and I want to remember it fondly. Right Kaya?" Nami asked, making the blonde haired girl jump. She swallowed the lump in her throat as the Bear King turned his attention to her. The same man who had instilled fear in her heart for months and harmed the people of her home.

    And now she has to act like she wants to marry him? The very thought made her sick to her stomach. But she trusted that Nami had a plan, so she just had to suck it up and go along with it.

    "R-right! Our special day should be perfect. You wouldn''t want us too tired for the¡­ for the honeymoon, would you?" she asked, nearly gagging. Nami gave her a subtle thumbs up.

    "Yes, well¡­ I suppose that''s true. I guess one more day wouldn''t hurt," he said, making Nami give him a big, wide smile.

    "Oh thank you darling, you won''t regret it!"

    "Of course! Anything for my sweets!" he said, puffing out his chest and feeling real proud of himself. His crew could only watch as he was completely played by the two girls. Not that they could say anything, as disagreeing with them right now might set him off.

    They had no choice but to acknowledge they lost this round.

    "Oh, I''m so excited! I can''t wait for our honeymoon. Do you think we could even.. Hold hands?" the Bear King asked, blushing and giggling at the very thought. Nami couldn''t help but sweat drop at that. Holding hands is the last thing she''d be thinking about on her honeymoon.

    If it was her, she and her new hubby wouldn''t be leaving the hotel room for hours. She blushed deeply when the image of a husband entered her mind, and she could only picture a certain brown haired man. But the Bear King thought she was blushing over him and her, holding hands while walking along a beach.

    "Alright, take them to their room so they can get the rest they need. I want them fresh as can be for tomorrow," he ordered.

    "Alright you three, come along," Honey Queen ordered. They had no choice but to obey, following the blonde through the castle halls.

    "That was pretty clever of you, I''ll admit. But you only bought yourself a little time. Don''t think it changes anything," Honey Queen said.

    "We''ll see about that," Nami countered. She knew that her friends were coming for them, all she had to do now was be patient. She bought them all the time she could, the rest was up to them.

    "You guys better not let me down."