《The Blackwood Tourney》


 Ah, Academia

    It was time for microfauna engineering lab, and I was about as ready as I would ever be. We¡¯d been tinkering with our critters all semester, and today we¡¯d actually be printing them for grading. And so I cheerfully walked down the main corridor of Hasko Hall at Cthonic Mare Institute. En route I idly noticed the holographic dioramas of past alumni, before a new one caught my eye.


    I turned and took in the view of a fantastic trophy rendered in glittering platinum and emerald, shaped like a partially hatched egg. Beneath was the text ¡°Blackwood Invasive Species Competition, register today!¡± followed by a whole lot of detailed information on how to enter. It was somewhat interesting, but I really had to get to lab. So I turned away and resumed my trip to the lab at a normal walking pace; there was still plenty of time to get there without being counted as tardy, so I wouldn¡¯t need to fly.


    On the other hand, a chance to stretch my wings would be nice, and the corridor was tall and wide enough for flying to make sense. So I checked that my courier bag was well secured, stretched out my leathery bat-like wings from my shoulders, and catapulted myself into the air with my powerful raptor-like legs. I caught the air under my wings, and with a fwoomph of displaced air I thrust my way down the hallway. I approached my destination in just twenty seconds, flaring out my wings to bring myself to a stop as I touched down for a landing.


    And so I walked through the doors of Lab 520A in Hasko Hall, Veronica looking up from her lab station to note ¡°Hello Yures, I see you¡¯re a bit early today.¡±


    I replied to my classmate ¡°Yeah, I want to make sure that I have everything ready before Professor Thonne shows up.¡±


    Veronica Machinae frowned knowingly, before noting ¡°I see you¡¯re wearing your feminine morph today? You know Professor Thonne doesn¡¯t approve of you having three of them.¡±


    I shrugged ¡°Thonne can shove it; he¡¯s not allowed to fail me without that decision going before the review board, and failing me without merit would completely fuck up his his tenure application.¡±


    Veronica shrugged ¡°Fair enough. Good luck.¡±


    I smiled back ¡°You too Veronica.¡± as I made my way over to my lab station. I quickly started checking over my design documents as I checked that the bioprinter was in good working order. Of course, I¡¯d barely gotten started when Thonne stepped sharply into the room, his boots clicking against the tile floor as he walked. Mere moments later, he announced ¡°Welcome, class. Today we will print your final organisms for your microfauna lab course, as well as uploading the design files. Begin.¡±


    I of course was already well on my way to getting this done. Bioprinter feedstock wasn¡¯t provided so I¡¯d needed to supply my own. Fortunately I¡¯d already passed the microbiology classes with flying colors, so I¡¯d made a point of whipping up my own custom stem cell cartridges for the printer.


    So I dug around in my bag to find the cartridge and slotted it into the printer¡¯s feedstock socket with a satisfying ¡°Ker-chunk¡±. This was followed shortly after with the nutrient cartridge to provide those cells with what they¡¯d need to construct the extracellular matrix, bones, and connective tissues. The printer already had a water hookup, so at least that was already taken care of.


    From there it was a simple matter of using my tablet to load the design into the bio-printer, and off it went. Strictly speaking I could have done it directly, but there were grade penalties for practicing poor brain security protocols, so external devices it was.


    And so the printer started whirring away as the multitude of nozzles started putting together my critter. I quickly sent off a copy of the design file for both the engineered cells I was using and the macro-scale structure of the organism, and turned around to see Professor Thonne¡¯s bioluminescent eyes glowing red as he stared intently at my work.


    A few moments passed as he noted the action of the printing head in total and ominous silence, before he noted ¡°Well, at the very least you have managed to create a printing template for a working organism. In addition, I note that the printer head is making two of them in parallel. Is there a reason for that, perchance?¡±


    I nodded, noting ¡°I decided to make placental mammals with sexual reproduction as primary, though they have parthenogenic cloning available as a backup option. Still, this means that for reproduction testing they need a breeding pair.¡±


    I noted the professor¡¯s long pointed ears twitch slightly as he glared, the red glow in his eyes intensifying ever so slightly as he ran his gaze down my body and noticed my honestly rather large chest. Immediately his eyes snapped back up to meet my gaze, and he replied ¡°Very well, Yures Hann. I shall leave you to supervising your print.¡±


    I shuddered slightly as Thonne¡¯s gaze left me, before I returned to watching as the print head kept whirring away at the pair of critters I¡¯d designed. I took a lot of design inspiration from rodents and mustelids on them, but I¡¯d also worked in some extra features that weren¡¯t normally found in either of those ancient clades. Case in point, I¡¯d given them each eight legs and a truly nasty set of venomous claws that were also well-suited to burrowing.


    Anyway, the printing was set to take about a kilosecond in total before my critters were fully ready. So I settled in to wait as I watched layer after layer of tissue be deposited and start differentiating into all the various organs, bodily fluids, and other structures that they¡¯d need for their life functions. It¡¯d take another two kiloseconds for their bone structure and other such things to fully solidify afterwards, but considering the lab period was nine kiloseconds long that would be plenty of time to put them through their paces.


    Anyway, I settled down to do some more studying as the printer worked, working on my history paper as I waited. I got a thousand words or so down in the meantime, before the printer came to a halt and retracted upwards. Sure enough, there were two freshly made animals on the base plate, slowly waking up as the routines preventing the brain from booting while it was only half printed came to a halt.


    There was a brief moment of motionlessness, then my furry little creations took their first breath and started clambering to their feet. I watched intently as they started sniffing each other, quickly retrieving the carry case for pets I¡¯d brought. Coaxing the animals into the cage from the enclosure of the bio-printer took a few moments, but soon enough I had them ready to go for examination.


    I¡¯d barely closed the cage when Thonne got on my case again, noting ¡°Ah, Yures. I see your organisms are completed. In addition you managed to get them out of the printer without it or yourself sustaining any notable damage, which is¡­ efficient, unlike your general lifestyle. We will be progressing to evaluations shortly.¡±


    I grimaced slightly at his tone, but things were quite out of my hands now. Professor Thonne wheeled out the evaluation equipment. As he did so, I got a good look at the apparatus. There was a treadmill for mobility testing, digestive function scanners to determine how different types of food were handled, an immunology response tester, and a small terrarium full of concealed food caches to measure how effective our organisms were at foraging.


    As the professor brought the machinery to a halt, he noted ¡°Attention, class. Yures¡¯ submission has finished printing and will now be put through evaluations. Yures, please release your organisms into the treadmill section to start the evaluation of their speed and endurance.¡±


    And so I nervously brought the pet carrier over to the evaluation machine. I brought it into alignment, opened the door, and unceremoniously dumped the ferrets onto the conveyor belt where they immediately righted themselves. I¡¯d briefly considered trying to put them in more gently, but considering just how viciously they¡¯d been programmed to respond to unwanted handling I opted not to risk getting clawed up and needing medical attention.


    The ferrets now on the treadmill, the evaluation machine immediately began revving up to significant speed. The ferrets started out at a walk, then moved to a jog, and finally reached a full-fledged gallop of five meters per second, limited largely by the lower gravity on Bark. Then they stayed at that pace for almost an entire kilosecond, professor Thonne going to get other evaluation rigs for the other students in the meantime.


    My ferrets still showed no signs of tiring out when Professor Thonne made his way back and noted in a cold and clinical tone ¡°It seems that your creatures have passed the mobility and endurance tests with flying colors. They will now be allowed to attempt the foraging challenge.¡±


    With that the treadmill suddenly lurched to a halt as the divider opened, my ferrets managing to react in time to avoid catapulting themselves forwards into the glass of the terrarium. Almost immediately they started sniffing around for food, and mere minutes later they¡¯d dug up every single morsel that had been buried in the dirt of the terrarium. From there the ferrets were coaxed into the third chamber of the evaluator even as a drone started resetting the foraging terrarium for the next student.


    From there a few basic tests were done to determine how well the organism¡¯s digestive and immune systems were working, some of those tests being distinctly scatological in nature. Every single thing came up flawlessly; I¡¯d managed to get the digestive systems working swiftly and efficiently, and the immune cells I included trivially dispatched the pathogens that had been included in the food morsels. Half a kilosecond of this passed before Professor Thonne noted ¡°Yures, your evaluation is complete. Please collect your submission and return home.¡±


    I nodded and started coaxing my ferrets into the pet carrier, carefully closing the door as soon as the both of them were secure. Afterwards I waited around for a few minutes to see how everyone else was doing, pleasantly noting that my ferrets were outperforming the majority of my classmates. Only then did I turn to leave, making my way to the exit of Hasko Hall and flying back to the dorm I was staying in. En route I noticed that I was starting to feel less and less comfortable in my feminine morph, but fortunately I had a solution to that waiting for me as soon as I got back.Unauthorized usage: this narrative is on Amazon without the author''s consent. Report any sightings.


    As soon as I entered my dorm room I gently set down my stuff and released the ferrets into the enclosure I¡¯d prepared for them. That done, my next priority was switching out to one of my other morphs. I quickly stepped into the rotating support closet I had set up for them, thought for a moment about which gender felt the most right at the moment, and selected the androgynous morph instead of the masculine one.


    The scanning probe came down, there was the distinct non-transition associated with a good Mindcast, and then I was wearing one of my other bodies. This one still had the same wings and raptor legs, but was less blatantly female than the one I¡¯d just been wearing.


    Immediate annoyance now dealt with, I figured it was finally time to look at my grades for that lab final. I quickly fired up the network access computer, signed into the university¡¯s systems, and after a few minutes of navigation to find the right page I finally got a good look at my grade. My first reaction was shock and confusion, followed by pure incandescent anger. This was for one simple reason: the grade I received was only one point above the pass threshold.


    My anger only intensified as I read over the list of half-assed ¡®justifications¡¯ that Professor Thonne had scrawled onto the graded version of the documentation, it becoming more and more clear that he¡¯d taken out his personal issues on my grade. This was completely and utterly unacceptable.


    Fortunately my academic advisor was always open for this sort of thing, so I grabbed my tablet, grabbed my bag, and started making my way to Ruje hall. A quick flight over the campus later, I arrived at the building and started making my way to the bio-engineering department. I idly noticed that the previous secretary had been replaced, and read the name on the desk to make sure I got their name right.


    Then I greeted them, ¡°Hello Ressen, I¡¯m Yures Hann, and I¡¯m here to speak with Doctor Brose.¡±


    The secretary quirked one of their mechanical eyebrows, before noting ¡°Doctor Brose is currently out assisting a party from the Frontier with an investigation, but should be back within a few kiloseconds if you wish to wait.¡±


    I nodded, saying ¡°That makes sense. Though I¡¯m honestly rather confused why he¡¯s involved with the investigation.¡± as I sat in one of the comfortable chairs around. Ressen simply shrugged, and we both sat in silence for quite some time.


    Shortly thereafter I got to see Doctor Sagi Brose pass through the lobby followed by seven identical cat girls in what were obviously suits of military combat armor. A few minutes passed before the cat girls left again, and I got up to make my way to Doctor Brose¡¯s office.


    When I got there I found him sitting in his normal lizard morph, greeting him with ¡°Hello professor Brose. Something came up and I¡¯m wondering if you can help with it.¡±


    Doctor Brose nodded before asking ¡°What seems to be the issue, Yures? Are you worried about an upcoming assignment?¡±


    I sighed, before explaining ¡°No, I¡¯m actually more worried about a completed one believe it or not. I just did my final in microfauna engineering, and I¡¯m fairly certain that the grade Thonne gave me was deliberately reduced due to a personal grudge.¡±


    With that I handed the tablet with my grades on it to Doctor Brose, who quickly began reading through it, making brief noises of disgruntlement as he looked through it. He then quickly called up the recordings of how my organism evaluations had actually gone, his brow furrowing as he compared the actual course of events with Thonne¡¯s adjusted version.


    After several minutes, Doctor Brose concluded ¡°Yures, you are entirely correct to be upset. What Thonne did was unacceptable, and I will certainly be bringing it up with regards to his tenure application. Unfortunately, I cannot directly help you.¡±


    I paused for a moment as I tried to collect my thoughts on the matter, before asking ¡°Why?¡±


    Sagi sighed as he answered ¡°Because he didn¡¯t strictly speaking fail you, that¡¯s why. The rules only allow a grade to be altered retroactively if it caused a student to erroneously pass or fail, which Thonne strictly speaking did not, even though he reduced your grade sufficiently to not count as a valid prerequisite for subsequent courses. I may have some authority to bend the rules to get you into those classes anyway, but Thonne struck precisely to cause you severe inconvenience without immediately landing himself in trouble.¡±


    I groaned, before asking ¡°Is there any advice about where to go from here? I really don¡¯t want to spend another entire semester making up for lost time over this blatant pettiness.¡±


    Doctor Brose thought for a moment, before noting ¡°It¡¯s not strictly speaking an official policy, but Cthonic Mare Institute does have a tendency for allowing notable accomplishments to count as alternative prerequisites to classes. As an example, if someone placed highly in a rocketry competition it can allow them easier access to more advanced spacecraft engineering courses, even though they never actually took the introduction course. Still, for bypassing the need for this particular prerequisite would require something truly prestigious in your list of accolades.¡±


    I thought back to that flier I¡¯d passed in the hallway, before asking ¡°Would the Blackwood Invasive Species Tournament be sufficient to count as an alternative prerequisite, then?¡±


    Doctor Brose¡¯s eyebrows shot up before he noted ¡°Yures, the Invasive Species Tournament would be much more than sufficient to count; in fact I would almost call it overkill. That said, please be aware that you¡¯ll be pitting yourself against the entirety of Bark if you do this, and I won¡¯t be able to help you; I¡¯m going to be one of the tournament judges this time, and am therefore legally required to be impartial.¡±


    I nodded as I thought. On the one hand, Doctor Brose was right; the Blackwood Invasive Species Tournament was one of the most highly contested competitions on Bark. On the other hand, if I managed to succeed at it, I¡¯d be able to rub my accomplishments in Thonne¡¯s stupid face in a way he simply couldn¡¯t deny. So I told Doctor Brose ¡°Thank you for the advice, I think I know what I need to do next.¡±


    With a hint of amusement in his voice, Doctor Brose asked ¡°Do excellently on all your other exams?¡±


    I nodded ¡°Right, glad I¡¯ve been studying for them.¡±


    A bit of time passed and I finished all my other exams, passing with flying colors on every last one where the professor didn¡¯t have a petty grudge against me. Meaning all of them except the lab I¡¯d had my grade sabotaged for. Once that was done, I started trawling the net for information on the Blackwood Invasive Species Tournament, particularly how it was organized, and how one would go about registering yourself or a team as a competitor.


    What I learned first was that the idea of the Invasive Species Tournament being a single overarching ¡°Best Species Wins¡± event was completely wrong. There were tens of thousands of separate categories based on ecological role and environment.


    Strictly speaking there were four tiers of trophy, and aside from the Platinum Egg each and every one of them was given to thousands of recipients. The Bronze Egg was awarded simply for your organism finding a viable ecological niche and not being wiped out. The Silver Egg was awarded for not only finding a niche, but displacing an existing species to reach that ecological niche.


    The Golden Egg was Best In Category, divided both by type of organism submitted and geographical region of Blackwood, and was the first level of trophy for which the judges had notable discretion over who it was awarded to. Finally came the Grand Prize in the form of the Platinum Egg, which was awarded to whatever organism the judges deemed the most suitable.


    The statistics meanwhile indicated that no matter what else happened, I wanted a team. Sole inventors only sometimes got a bronze or silver egg and almost never a golden egg. Meanwhile teams of more than four or so started suffering issues due to creative differences. Looking at the data, it was clear that I would want a partner for this at the very least, maybe a team of three counting myself.


    Immediately I discounted Veronica as a possibility; she was a nice person and a good friend, but when we tried to collaborate on a project the results were guaranteed to be an utter failure; something about each of our workflows just didn¡¯t mesh. I had no doubt that she¡¯d have joined in if asked, but given that such would likely do more harm than good it would be counterproductive.


    Given that she wasn¡¯t an option, that meant I needed to go looking for other people who might be interested in helping out for the tournament. Which meant trawling the CMI message boards looking for other students interested in the Invasive Species Tournament.


    I didn¡¯t have to wait long for someone to express interest, a microbiology graduate student by the name of Queen Shed replying that she was quite interested in proving herself for the tourney. Meanwhile another student who¡¯d also been screwed over by Thonne indicated that he would also be very interested in joining our team. We quickly set about scheduling, and soon we had all arranged to meet over lunch tomorrow.


    The assigned time and place rolled around, with me waiting at the Good Eats sandwich assembler for about a kilosecond before either of my prospective teammates showed up. I was wearing my masculine morph today since it¡¯s just the body I felt the most comfortable in right now, sipping a vaguely sweet and sour fruit drink as I noticed someone arriving.


    Her scales were a dull red across most of her body with a tanned underbelly, she had tough leathery wings folded from her shoulder blades, her eyes were vertically slitted, and her thick, stocky limbs ended in razor sharp talons. She was also a bit curvy, and she spoke with a dissonantly soft voice as she asked ¡°Hello, I¡¯m Queen. Are you Yures?¡±


    I nodded to confirm, replying ¡°Indeed I am.¡± I waited for a brief moment before noting ¡°I see you¡¯re a dragon.¡±


    Queen hummed with approval, noting ¡°Yeah; I kind of have to be. I get all kinds of dysphoric when I¡¯m not in a sufficiently dragon-y morph, and it¡¯s no fun at all. You wouldn¡¯t believe how much paperwork I had to go through for the integrated flamethrower.¡±


    I felt myself loosening up at the common ground we shared, noting ¡°Ah. Meanwhile I keep having to switch between three different morphs because my gender identity shifts around constantly. I understand completely.¡±


    That¡¯s when another person made themselves known, an energetic spider-like synthmorph bouncing along to the table we were sitting at. They clambered up onto one of the chairs and greeted us ¡°Hi, I¡¯m Wesseck. I heard you two were interested in joining the Blackwood Invasive Species Tournament with me?¡±


    I nodded, noting ¡°Yes. I¡¯m Yures, and this is Queen. Nice to meet you Wesseck.¡±


    That¡¯s about when Queen noted ¡°So, from what I¡¯ve heard you two both got your grades sabotaged by professor Thonne? I¡¯ve never had a class with him so I don¡¯t know firsthand, but he sounds like a total ass.¡±


    I nodded, saying ¡°Yes. He doesn¡¯t approve of my morph swapping for nonsensical reasons of ¡®efficiency¡¯, and he docked my grade hard enough that I¡¯d need to retake that lab course to get back at me for it.¡± making sure to properly time my air quotes.


    Wesseck nodded their blue plastic head sadly before noting ¡°Same story for me, though I¡¯m pretty sure it¡¯s just my general enthusiastic attitude that set him off. Professors are supposed to be happy when a student is excited about learning, so I¡¯m really not sure what¡¯s wrong with Thonne.¡±


    To her credit, Queen winced in sympathy, before asking ¡°Want me to burn him? I know my way around the campus and I can probably contrive an excuse that¡¯d let me do it without getting in trouble.¡±


    Both Wesseck and I shook our heads no, and I explained ¡°While tempting, that wouldn¡¯t solve our actual problem. We¡¯re entering the competition because getting a trophy in it will let us not have to retake the courses Thonne screwed us over in, and also let us rub our worth as bio-engineers in his stupid face.¡±


    Queen grinned, displaying a row of sharp teeth as she noted ¡°That¡¯s what I was hoping to hear. So, Thonne¡¯s made his opinion quite clear, but I think there¡¯s lines for exactly this eventuality in Bark¡¯s national anthem.¡±


    Wesseck perked up as they immediately began singing the relevant verse ¡°They called us mad!¡±


    I joined in with the next line in perfect harmony with Wesseck ¡°But we¡¯ll show them!¡±


    And finally all three of us sang as one ¡°WE WILL SHOW THEM ALL!¡±


    <hr>


    This is the free edition of The Blackwood Tourney. It is entirely pre-written, and will have one chapter released each week on Saturday.


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 Tournament Registration

    The first thing we needed to decide for registering was what category we were going to sign up for. Both Wesseck and I had been screwed over by Thonne, but crucially we¡¯d been screwed over in different labs. I¡¯d been screwed over in Microfauna lab, while Wesseck had been shafted in Botanical Engineering. Queen was meanwhile quite specialized in microbiology, and wanted to make sure that whatever we did she could make full use of her more in-depth knowledge.


    We¡¯d been discussing it for a few minutes before I realized ¡°Wait, I think we might be arguing in circles here. The main reason Wesseck and I are so insistent about what sort of organism we make is because of the need to fill in for sabotaged class pre-requisites, but competing in the tournament might grant significantly broader qualifications than we¡¯re assuming. We should really talk to someone about this. Probably Doctor Brose, since he¡¯s the academic advisor for all three of us.¡±


    Wesseck and Queen both nodded in agreement, as Wesseck noted ¡°That makes sense. Think we can handle this over the net, or should we go in person?¡±


    I was already pulling out my phone as I replied ¡°A quick phone call will probably suffice.¡± and navigated the contacts menu to reach Doctor Brose¡¯s entry.


    A few moments later, Doctor Brose picked up and asked ¡°Ah, Yures. Are you calling to update me on your tournament registration?¡±


    I replied ¡°Kind of. I¡¯ve found a couple team-mates, with Wesseck in it for the same reason I am but for a different class. Anyway, we¡¯re wondering if our entry in the tournament only strictly counts for the class its category corresponds to, or if it¡¯s a bit broader than that. For example, if we enter microfauna, would that count for Wesseck¡¯s botanical engineering requirement?¡±


    Doctor Brose¡¯s reply came promptly as he answered ¡°No it wouldn¡¯t sadly. Fortunately there are still some options available to you, mostly since there¡¯s nothing stopping a team from entering more than one organism. There¡¯s entire subcategories for multiple species that exist in symbiosis with each other, and entering one of those would probably solve your issue if you chose which one carefully.¡±


    I replied ¡°Thank you for the advice professor Brose. I hope your day¡¯s going well.¡±


    There were a few more formalities before the call was terminated and I relayed the information. Queen was already searching through the tournament registration site on her laptop to find the symbiotic organism categories as soon as I told her about this, even as Wesseck thought aloud ¡°Honestly it sounds like submitting a trio of organisms in a symbiotic relationship would probably be our best option. A plant, a small animal, and a microbe.¡±


    I ran with this idea, saying ¡°That sounds like a good approach. The plant feeds the animal, the animal performs seed dispersal, protects the plant, and eliminates competing flora, and the microbe causes horrible infections in anything that tries to eat its primary hosts.¡±


    Wesseck vibrated with excitement at the praise, even as Queen chipped in ¡°So, I may have taken a few courses involved in nanoweapon design. If you wanted I¡¯m pretty sure I could make that symbiotic microbe into something that would go right for the brain and completely alter the behavior of anything that can¡¯t fight it off.¡±


    Wesseck and I both immediately started applauding Queen¡¯s excellent idea as I replied ¡°That opens up so many possibilities! Excellent suggestion, Queen!¡±


    Queen showed a bit of fang as she smiled in approval and said ¡°Glad you like it! Anyway, I¡¯m pretty sure I¡¯ve found the correct category for what types of organism we¡¯re going to deploy. Now we¡¯ve just got two things to decide: the location, and our team name.¡±


    Wesseck thought for a moment, before noting ¡°If we¡¯re going for one of the higher tier trophies we should probably pick a region where not too many teams are planning on competing in the same category. The more competition we have to worry about the less likely we are to succeed at this.¡±


    Queen exhaled a couple small jets of flame from her nostrils with a sad look on her face as she informed Wesseck ¡°Sadly that¡¯s not really workable. The tournament organizers don¡¯t announce how many competitors are entering for each region before the registration period is already over.¡±


    I hummed in thought, before noting ¡°What we really need is to come up with what sort of biome we want to enter into. Personally, I¡¯d say we should put our entry into a scrublands biome; not having to deal with trees shading out our plant would be really helpful, but by the same token we want conditions that are conducive to plant growth.¡±


    Queen quickly looked up some details before noting ¡°I¡¯ve got a candidate location. It¡¯s forty four degrees of latitude south from the north pole and ninety degrees of longitude east of Point Zero. Cold winters that dump meters of snow on the ground each year, lots of rain from the adjacent ocean, and the lightning storms cause regular fires that deplete the population of mature trees. It¡¯s perfect.¡±


    Wesseck and I leaned over to get a better look at Queen¡¯s laptop screen, and I got a good look at the name of the location. I read down the description of the site, getting more and more excited about it as I read. Then I saw the name: Thundersnow Steppe.


    I was about to voice my approval when Wesseck sprang into action, pulling Queen into an extremely enthusiastic tackle hug as he said ¡°Thank you so much for finding that place Queen it¡¯s awesome and I really really think we should sign up for that location so please can we register for the tournament right now?¡±


    I laughed at the slight absurdity of the situation before telling Wesseck ¡°Sure, but we still need to figure out what to call our team. It¡¯s a prerequisite for registering in the tournament after all.¡±


    Queen thought for a moment, before noting ¡°It¡¯s probably not a good idea to pick a team name that¡¯s a direct jab at Professor Thonne. If we do that we¡¯re going to end up stewing about it for the whole tournament and it¡¯ll make it harder to think clearly.¡±


    Wesseck agreed ¡°Yeah, let¡¯s definitely steer clear of mentioning that spite-fueled grump in our team name. Maybe something about our symbiosis strategy?¡±


    I thought for a moment, before asking ¡°Queen, is Team Symbio taken?¡±


    Queen quickly typed a query, before replying ¡°Sorry, that team name¡¯s been taken for a few Megaseconds. Same for obvious variants like Symtrio and Triad.¡±


    Wesseck bounced up and down in excitement, before asking ¡°What about Snow Coast Symbiotes?¡±


    Queen checked and replied ¡°It¡¯s actually not taken. We could go with that team if we wanted to.¡±


    I shrugged, before saying ¡°I¡¯ve got no objections to naming our team Snow Coast Symbiotes. It¡¯s slightly inaccurate, but it¡¯s catchy and available, and that¡¯s what matters.¡±


    A few keystrokes later, Queen had entered the team name and clicked the register button. She smiled as she noted ¡°Good news, we are now officially registered for the Invasive Species Tournament as the Snow Coast Symbiotes. We should be getting confirmation right about¡­ now.¡±


    The instant Queen finished her remark, all of us felt our phones vibrating as they produced the ¡°Message received¡± signal.


    I quickly retrieved mine from my bag, and I couldn¡¯t help but smile as I read:


    ¡°Welcome to the Blackwood Invasive Species Tournament, Yures Hann. You are now registered as part of the Snow Coast Symbiotes. You are competing in the Plant/Animal/Microbe exosymbiosis category for the Thundersnow Steppe. If you don¡¯t have access to your own private laboratory, one will be provided for the duration of the competition.


    Sincerely, the Blackwood Tournament Committee¡±


    I shared a glance with Queen as she smugly grinned, then with Wesseck as he vibrated with excitement. Thinking for a moment, I asked ¡°So we¡¯re officially a team now, who wants to get snacks to commemorate the occasion?¡±


    Wesseck jumped about a meter into the air as he replied ¡°Absolutely! That said I¡¯m a bit lost on what type exactly.¡±


    Queen idly suggested ¡°Ice cream, perhaps?¡± as she stowed her computer in her bag.


    Wesseck twirled in place before agreeing ¡°That sounds great! Onwards!¡± before bounding for the door.


    Queen and I shared a look, before rapidly getting up from our seats and dashing after him. We shortly caught up and I asked ¡°Wesseck, where are you headed?¡±


    Wesseck cheerfully replied ¡°I know a place, race you there!¡± before transmitting a file containing the exact coordinates of the ice cream station Wesseck had in mind.


    I asked Queen ¡°Did you get the address too?¡± and the dragon simply nodded in the affirmative as we crossed into the relatively open air of the Cthonic Mare Arcology.


    So I only grinned as I squatted down and catapulted myself into the air pursued by a jovial dragon as I started towards my destination. The air beneath my wings felt wonderful, and I couldn¡¯t help cheering with joy as I flew over buildings and around the corner towards the ice cream station. Queen and I both landed, and looking around I couldn¡¯t spot Wesseck anywhere.


    Idly I remarked ¡°Guess we¡¯d better wait for Wesseck to get here.¡±


    I was then immediately corrected by Wesseck announcing ¡°Actually I got here first. I hitched a ride on Queen and then jumped the rest of the way when she was coming in for a landing.¡±


    Queen blinked in surprise, before asking ¡°Wesseck, how? Shouldn¡¯t I have noticed you doing that?¡±The narrative has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the infringement.


    Wesseck¡¯s only response was ¡°I am a very stealthy spider.¡± as he started queuing up an order on one of the ice cream machines.


    A few moments later we all had a cone of our preferred ice cream flavors with a wide variety of toppings. In my case I¡¯d gone for classic soft-serve vanilla with a caramel dip coating, and I was greatly enjoying it.


    I still had about a third of my ice cream left when I felt myself getting a bit less comfortable for no apparent reason. After a few moments I figured out that I felt more like a she right now, which meant... Groaning, I announced ¡°Sorry, but I need to swing by my dorm room to swap bodies. My screwy gender identity is acting up again, and I just don¡¯t match this morph right now.¡±


    Queen shrugged and replied ¡°Do what you need to do, Yures. Call us when you¡¯ve gotten yourself swapped out, and we¡¯ll arrange a meetup.¡±


    I nodded in acknowledgment, quickly finishing my ice cream before taking to the air once more and making my course directly towards my dorm. A few minutes later I¡¯d landed and reached my floor, then my room. From there it was only a couple moments to swap to my feminine body, then pick out something to wear.


    That task done I called Queen, saying ¡°I¡¯ve gotten my morph swap done. Where are you?¡±


    Immediately Queen replied ¡°We¡¯re checking out the lab the tournament officials are providing us with. It¡¯s amazing, you should really come see it.¡±


    I replied, ¡°I¡¯ll be right over once you tell me where it is.¡±


    One address and a train ride later, I was looking at the building Queen had directed me to. From the outside it didn¡¯t seem much like anything special, just a unit in a light industrial district with big tinted windows to let in light. From the balcony I could easily see the planet we were orbiting, Blackwood gently rotating below us like a beautiful malevolent gemstone. Still, a view was just a view, and really I was more interested in what was inside the lab.


    As the door opened, Queen greeted me ¡°Nice to have you back, Yures. By the way, your new body is quite good-looking.¡±


    I replied ¡°Thanks for the compliment, Queen. Anyway, mind showing me around the lab?¡±


    Wesseck chose that moment to open the door as he replied ¡°Actually we haven¡¯t seen the inside of the lab either; we were waiting for you!¡±


    As Queen and I followed Wesseck in I couldn¡¯t help say ¡°Aw, that¡¯s so nice.¡±


    Then I was floored by the sight of the laboratory. Not only were there four separate bio-printers of varying sizes, but there was all the other equipment we could possibly ask for. There were high-security terrariums for organism testing, several high-end computational systems for design work, molecular robotics assemblers for work on the individual cells we¡¯d be using to make our organism out of, and a whole host of other equipment besides.


    Staring at the array of equipment, I found myself speechless. I tried to talk, saying ¡°Er...¡± but I couldn¡¯t come up with anything to elaborate on that further. Nervously I glanced over to take a look at Queen, only to see that she looked fairly stunned too.


    There were a few moments of silence as we all waited for someone else to talk first, before Wesseck proclaimed ¡°This is awesome! Come on, let¡¯s try out the equipment and make sure it all works! It doesn¡¯t even need to be something we¡¯re planning on entering into the tournament but this is the best lab I¡¯ve ever been in and I want to have some fun getting to know my way around it!¡±


    With that the spell was broken, and I quickly followed Wesseck into the lab, remarking ¡°I want to print out another pair of the ferrets I came up with for microfauna lab first thing. They¡¯re cute pets, and they might serve as an interesting base for the animal component of our trifecta.¡±


    Wesseck thought for a moment, before replying ¡°Yeah, that sounds good. I¡¯d like to print out the flower bush I came up with for Botany too, if that¡¯s OK?¡±


    Queen simply smiled as she looked up from the molecular robotics designer, noting ¡°Both of those sound excellent. That said I don¡¯t have a comparable pre-existing project, so I think that for this part I¡¯ll simply watch and provide commentary.¡±


    And with that I got to entering the data into the printer for the ferrets, before I realized ¡°Oops, left the feedstock cartridge back at home. I used some home brew cells for the ferrets, so I¡¯m not sure that the standard feedstock will work here.¡±


    Queen hummed, before noting ¡°If you¡¯d like I can take a look at your feedstock requirements and probably get a batch whipped up in fairly short order.¡±


    I smiled and involuntarily flared my wings as I replied ¡°Would you? It¡¯d be great.¡± and quickly used my tablet to send the file to Queen.


    It took the dragon a few minutes to look over the data, before she noted ¡°You did a pretty good job, considering that the cellular level isn¡¯t what you¡¯re specialized in. I can see tons of improvements to be made here and there, but all in all, you should feel proud about this stuff.¡±


    I smiled, then winced in unpleasant reminiscence as I found myself comparing Queen¡¯s feedback to Thonne.


    Wesseck picked up on this almost instantly, asking ¡°Yures, are you doing alright? Do you need to swap morphs again?¡±


    I sighed ¡°No, just thinking back to that horrible professor. Still, you do bring up an excellent point. If I¡¯m going to be spending prolonged periods working here it¡¯d make sense to get another rack of morphs to wear and keep it here at the lab. That way I won¡¯t need to trek all the way back to campus each time I need to switch.¡±


    Queen and Wesseck both nodded appreciatively, Wesseck noting ¡°Makes perfect sense to me. If you need to switch bodies to be comfortable, that should be easy and convenient. That said I¡¯m pretty glad I don¡¯t have that particular issue; I¡¯m just fine being a genderless robot spider.¡±


    I shrugged ¡°Fair enough, it is a pretty major hassle sometimes. Anyway, I¡¯m going to order that morph rack now; I figure we won¡¯t need to worry about getting the morphs since we¡¯ll just bring my existing ones here, but the rack in the dorm is university property.¡±


    Queen turned back to her console as she resumed working on improving my printer feedstock recipe, replying ¡°Do what you need to be comfortable, Yures. Being uncomfortable in a body is no fun at all.¡±


    And so I got out my tablet and set about ordering the morph rack off a fabricator service. Soon enough I got a note that it would be here within a Megasecond at the longest, and I noted ¡°I¡¯ve ordered the morph rack, is there anything anyone else wants to feel more at home here in the lab?¡±


    Immediately, Queen replied ¡°Volcano-style hot tub, one that can get to boiling and has the good glow lamps and water colorants. Dragon instincts mean it feels really relaxing to take a bath in what¡¯s basically a pool of cartoon lava, and there¡¯s plenty of room for it in the lab¡¯s attached flats.¡±


    I added the hot tub to the shopping list, even as Wesseck asked ¡°Can we please get some co-operative board games? They¡¯ll be a nice wind-down activity for when we¡¯re not working on stuff, and they don¡¯t take up too much room when not in use.¡±


    I nodded, replying ¡°Got it. A morph rack for me, a volcano tub for Queen, and some board games for Wesseck. Sounds good.¡± before finalizing the fabrication order and specifying the installation location.


    Then I noted that Wesseck already had their bush printing, and asked ¡°I¡¯m guessing you used standard feedstock for the plant you came up with?¡±


    Wesseck replied ¡°Yeah, that¡¯s one of the stupid excuses Thonne came up with to screw up my grade, something about lacking creativity. Even worse I¡¯m pretty sure he¡¯d have called any custom feedstock I came up with shoddy work and used that as an excuse to dock points too.¡±


    Thinking back to my own sabotaged grades, I couldn¡¯t help but note ¡°Considering that¡¯s what happened to me, you¡¯re entirely correct.¡±


    Queen took that moment to interject, noting ¡°Yes, we all know Thonne is an asshole who should be fired for academic misconduct, we don¡¯t need to keep repeating it over and over. Wesseck, from what I can see of your plant so far it¡¯s beautiful.¡±


    Wesseck stood up straighter in good cheer as he said ¡°I¡¯m glad you like it, Queen! When the flowers bloom they¡¯re going to be amazing; I put a lot of work into making the flower petals change color depending on the viewing angle.¡±


    I gently rubbed Wesseck on his upper carapace as I said ¡°I¡¯m looking forward to seeing them bloom, I have a feeling that they¡¯ll be amazing.¡±


    There was a brief moment as Queen noted ¡°Anyway, do we want to get started on prototyping our organisms yet, or is there anything else we should be working on in the meantime?¡±


    I shrugged my wings, noting ¡°Maybe we should take a look at the flats that are attached to the lab? Pretty clearly we¡¯re expected to live here during the competition, so we might as well take a look at the place and make sure it¡¯s going to be somewhere we can live without issues.¡±


    Queen pursed her lips in thought for a moment, before she replied ¡°That¡¯s a sensible course of action. Let¡¯s do it.¡±


    And so we all filed up the stairs into the residential section of the lab block. It was currently set up as something vaguely resembling a house. There were four personal rooms, a kitchen, an entertainment area, an office, and a couple hygiene chambers. Seeing all of this, I noted ¡°Well, I¡¯d say that this looks like a pretty good residence setup. Anyone else want to comment?¡±


    That¡¯s when Wesseck burst from the kitchen with a smudge of pink around his mouth, saying ¡°There¡¯s an ice cream machine there! I¡¯m so happy!¡±


    I chuckled at Wesseck¡¯s antics, asking ¡°You really like ice cream, huh?¡±


    Wesseck nodded, before replying ¡°Uh huh, I had this morph fitted with a digestive system specifically for ice cream because I love it so much. Guessing you and Queen like flying?¡±


    I nodded, saying ¡°Yeah; there¡¯s something liberating about soaring through the air under my own power. I¡¯d need to seriously overhaul my flight muscles to do it anywhere with gravity much stronger than here, but as it stands I¡¯m in a comfortable place with regards to my self-aviation capabilities.¡±


    Queen smiled as she tapped her talons together, noting ¡°I¡¯m in a similar boat, though my dragon morph would be fully capable of flying in Blackwood¡¯s gravity if I ever went there myself. That can largely be credited to Doctor Brose; he really is amazing at achieving a high power-to-weight ratio for biological systems.¡±


    Wesseck idly noted ¡°Makes sense; he¡¯s been tinkering with those wyverns of his for ages. If anyone could make a working dragon, it¡¯s him. I¡¯m actually a bit worried about going up against him in the competition given how long he¡¯s been working with Blackwood¡¯s ecosystem.¡±


    I smiled, before noting ¡°Good news Wesseck, we don¡¯t need to worry about that. Sagi¡¯s judging this year.¡±


    Wesseck sighed in relief, before noting ¡°Anyway, I suppose we should get to work on our prototype organisms soon?¡±


    I shook my head, remarking ¡°Speak for yourself, I¡¯ve got a bunch of my stuff I want to move in here. The semester¡¯s over so we¡¯ll get kicked out of the University dorms soon, and this seems like as good a place as any to live in the meantime.¡±


    Queen took that opportunity to ask ¡°Want some help moving? I don¡¯t mind hauling stuff.¡±


    I shrugged, before replying ¡°I mean, you can if you want to. Though I¡¯m not sure why you would given I was just going to rent some moving drones to do it.¡±


    Queen smiled as she said ¡°Bonding exercise? Also I can haul your other two morphs if you want, seeing as you¡¯re having a closet for them installed here.¡±


    I thought for a moment, then answered ¡°You know, I think I¡¯ll take you up on that offer, Queen. Wesseck, are you coming?¡±


    Wesseck immediately replied ¡°Nope! I¡¯ve got my own dorm room stuff to move, and I kind of want it to be a surprise when you see it all set up in my new room here.¡±


    I found it impossible to resist the opportunity for a bit of light teasing, asking ¡°Is it a web by any chance?¡±


    Wesseck answered ¡°Nope! You¡¯ll see.¡±


    With that we made our separate ways. Queen and I flew back to my CMI dorm in a leisurely manner. When we entered my room, the moving drones were already here. Queen mock-gasped at the sight, remarking ¡°Yures, I thought we¡¯d agreed that I¡¯d be doing all the moving for you?¡±


    I wryly smiled at the dragon, even as I noted ¡°Sorry, but even you can¡¯t get everything at once, and I really want to get this move done in one trip. You can carry my other two bodies if you like though.¡±


    Queen replied ¡°Fair enough, I¡¯ve got drones moving my stuff already anyway. I was only pretending to be offended for kicks.¡±


    I just shrugged as we got to moving, and soon enough we were on our way back to the lab.


    When we got back, Wesseck was already here, saying ¡°Good to have you back, I already finished my own moving via telepresence. If you want we can go take a look at my room now that it¡¯s set up. I know you¡¯re curious.¡±


    Wesseck was right, so I answered ¡°Sure.¡± and followed after the robot spider as they cheerfully bounded towards their room. Then we entered and I saw row after row of small custom-made potted plants. Some had flowers, others were currently bearing fruit in a bewildering variety of shapes, but they were all beautiful.


    Looking around, I asked ¡°Did you make these?¡±


    Wesseck replied ¡°Yep! I¡¯ve been an amateur bio-engineer for a while; I wanted to take my skills to the professional level, and that¡¯s why I started college.¡±


    ¡°That¡¯s really cool, Wesseck.¡±

 Prototyping

    We started work on our organisms the next morning after we got the new lab. The conversation started over breakfast, with my two currently unused bodies on autopilot for eating and using the bathroom until the morph closet showed up. The total of four ferrets I¡¯d printed were currently raiding their food bowl over in the corner, while I was poking at some scrambled eggs that the automatic kitchen had whipped up.


    I noted ¡°So, we really need to hash out exactly how our organism trio will support and compliment each other in a lot more detail. We¡¯ve already got the basics worked out, but now¡¯s when we need to start working out the kinks and start putting together prototypes to get things working.¡±


    Queen thought for a moment, before she commented ¡°Well, one of the hardest problems will be making sure that my symbiotic microbes both won¡¯t cause an allergic reaction, won¡¯t accidentally cause symptoms in their primary hosts, and won¡¯t leave any exploitable gaps for other pathogens to sneak in through.¡±


    I briefly glanced over to where Wesseck was gorging themselves on ice cream, and waited for a reply. Wesseck simply kept eating their breakfast while gesturing for me to continue.


    Fair enough. After a few moments of eating, I noted ¡°Yeah, getting started on that today is important, but we also need to think about what other adaptations we¡¯re going to put in our organisms in order to make sure they can survive on Blackwood. Having nanoweapons ready to deploy is a useful trick, but any creature with only one main trick for survival is going to die really quick on Blackwood.¡±


    There were a few moments of silence as I thought, before noting ¡°Maybe we could fit our squirrels with a multi-purpose quill launcher? That way it has a method to deploy the pathogen at range, and also some other payloads for targets the nanoweapon is ineffective on. An exploding quill to the face isn¡¯t going to be fun for anything whatsoever on the receiving end.¡±


    Wesseck chose that moment to speak up, noting ¡°That¡¯s probably a good idea for the animal, though I¡¯m still trying to figure out what to do for the plant. Fairly obviously we want it to produce some sort of food for our symbiotic animal to eat, but we also want to make sure absolutely nothing else can safely digest that food. Maybe make nuts full of hideously explosive compounds and rig the squirrel¡¯s digestive system to decompose them for energy, while anything else eating them just gets blown up or mind controlled?¡±


    Queen grinned at this, exposing her mouth full of very very sharp teeth as she noted ¡°I have just the bio-synthesis pathway for explosives that you¡¯re looking for. Exactly how much bang do you two want your organisms to be capable of dishing out? And how much are you willing to risk a premature detonation?¡±


    Wesseck and I shared a glance before simultaneously replying ¡°All of it. Preferably with a minimum of premature detonations.¡±


    Queen thought for a moment, noting ¡°One of the more stable nitro explosives is probably the way to go then, though detonation systems seem like they¡¯d be a bit tricky to engineer. Hmmm¡­ strictly speaking we should probably only put the explosives synthesis pathway in the plant or microbe component of our symbiotic trio. Since the squirrel can just get it through its diet.¡±


    I nodded, as I finished my last bite of eggs, savoring it for a moment before I replied ¡°That makes sense. It¡¯s more thermodynamically favorable too, since the squirrel won¡¯t have to spend energy on synthesizing explosive molecules that our plant has already created. Full approval there. Wesseck, thoughts on the plants?¡±


    Our cybernetic arachnid companion tossed their empty ice cream container into the recycler as they remarked ¡°I know quite a bit about photosynthetic pathways already, so I¡¯m pretty sure I can work out an optimal leaf design for production of both conventional energy storage molecules and the explosives. That said I¡¯d really like it if Queen could help me look it over; I¡¯m a lot more specialized in the macro side of things than the micro side.¡±


    As queen finished the last slug of her yogurt, she noted ¡°Sure thing Wesseck, that¡¯s very easily arranged. Anyway, I do believe it¡¯s time for us to actually get to work on some initial prototype organisms.¡±


    As I got up from my seat and started walking towards the stairs leading to the actual lab, I couldn¡¯t help but ask ¡°Curiously, why do you like yogurt and other fermented products so much, Queen?¡±


    Queen followed me as she remarked ¡°I¡¯m so glad you asked! Basically, fermented products let me taste my own work. Fermentation is a process that by and large requires microbial intervention to function, and I decided that I wanted to tinker with custom strains of the microbes used in such. The results have proven quite tasty indeed.¡±


    I filed that piece of information as possibly being relevant later, even as we entered the lab space.


    As we entered, Wesseck asked ¡°Yures, could you please do some morphological prototyping on the squirrel to get it moving right? It can be using standard feedstock for right now, since Queen and I will both be working on the cellular-level compatibility stuff.¡±


    I nodded and replied ¡°Sure thing Wesseck!¡± before making my way to the Computer Assisted Design console. When I got there, I immediately started in on building the basic framework for the squirrel we would be deploying as part of our trio.


    The absolute first thing I wanted to do was put together a skeletal structure and attached musculature. Since these critters would be far too small to survive any serious damage from any organism of any significant size, that meant evasion was the absolute number one survival priority for them. To that end, I went all in for fast-twitch muscles. Yes, long-distance running endurance would suffer as a result of that decision, but that sort of endurance only mattered if you didn¡¯t get smashed into paste in the opening salvo.


    This fast-twitch muscle also factored into the quill launching capabilities once I figured out how I wanted to implement them. As such, I gave the quill follicles the ability to pivot the quills forwards, before the muscle fibers would contract to pull the quill out and send it on a ballistic trajectory into the target. Since each quill could be independently launched, this also meant that the squirrel could hypothetically fire their entire load of thousands of quills in under a second if they really had to. Piezoelectric materials included in the quill-tips meanwhile would be responsible for detonating the explosives once Queen and Wesseck had that sorted out.


    I didn¡¯t spend too much effort on the internal organs right away; I just copied most of what went into the ferrets and adjusted them for the somewhat different dimensions of the body cavity. Soon enough I had something I was willing to send to the printer for initial evaluation and testing, and that¡¯s exactly what I did.


    Still, it would take some time for the bio-printer to finish putting that squirrel together, and in the meantime I went to take a look at what Queen and Wesseck were working on. And so I sauntered over and asked ¡°So, how¡¯s it going on your end?¡±


    Wesseck excitedly replied ¡°It¡¯s going great! We¡¯ve already settled on PETN as the explosive of choice for stability reasons, and between the two of us we¡¯ve not only figured out how to make photosynthetic organelles for it, but we¡¯ve also made good progress on the detonator system for the nuts.¡±


    I thought for a moment, before asking ¡°That detonator will still work if the nuts get all chewed up, right?¡±


    Queen nodded as she replied ¡°Yes, since each individual cell of nut has its own detonator. Disarming it requires both a heavily encrypted radio signal, and a very specific signaling molecule in the digestive system. If those criteria aren¡¯t met, and the cells start having their membranes rupture? They explode.¡±


    I nodded, before noting ¡°I¡¯m going to need the details on that molecule by the way, since it should be fairly obvious that having our squirrel explode when they eat the nuts is not what we want to have happen.¡±


    Queen chuckled, before replying ¡°Yes, of course. Anyway, those nuts will also be full of our symbiotic nanoweapon, meaning that even if an unauthorized organism doesn¡¯t explode from eating them, they¡¯re going to get a horrible nanoweapon infection.¡±


    I grinned at the thought, before replying ¡°Sounds great! Curiously, what¡¯s the macro-scale structure of the plant looking like?¡±


    Wesseck immediately replied ¡°Here, take a look.¡± before gesturing towards the volumetric display he was working on.


    Fairly obviously, the plant was a bush. I took a moment to investigate the growth patterns, before something interesting caught my attention. I commented ¡°Huh, if you changed the branch patterns only slightly, each bush would have a perfectly sized and shaped alcove in it for our squirrels to live in.¡±


    Wesseck looked closely at his blueprints before noting ¡°You¡¯re absolutely correct. I¡¯ll get to that in the next revision, but as it stands we should actually print this prototype first to start working out the kinks via real-world testing.¡±


    I shrugged as I replied ¡°Seems like a good idea. So, guess we should send it to the printer?¡±


    Wesseck and Queen both nodded, a button was pressed, and the bio-printers started whirring away on the first iteration of what Wesseck had whimsically named a ¡°boomnut bush¡±.


    As the printers worked, I couldn¡¯t help but note ¡°So¡­ it¡¯s about lunchtime, and the bio-printers are going to be working for a while before they¡¯re done. Queen, could I please try some of that yogurt you make?¡±


    Queen smiled at my interest, replying ¡°I¡¯m so glad you asked, Yures. Follow me.¡±


    When we got back from lunch, Wesseck noted ¡°Looks like the squirrel finished printing at least, though the bush still has a while to go. Um, is it supposed to be completely still like that?¡±This story has been stolen from Royal Road. If you read it on Amazon, please report it


    I nodded as I replied ¡°Yes, yes it is. I haven¡¯t spent any time whatsoever on the cognitive side of things yet aside from basic drivers for all the active systems, so for initial evaluation this prototype is going to be under manual control.¡±


    I turned to retrieve a Mindcast cable from storage, even as Wesseck asked ¡°Isn¡¯t this going to be rather uncomfortable for you? You¡¯re pretty sensitive to what kind of body you¡¯re wearing.¡±


    I shrugged as I replied ¡°I said the squirrel would be under manual control, not that I¡¯d be wearing it. I¡¯m just going to install a remote control program and use that.¡±


    With that sorted out, I used the Mindcast cable to connect the squirrel to the console and set about downloading the remote control program into its brain. As soon as that was done, I disconnected the cable and used the corresponding app on my tablet to order it into one of the terrariums for evaluation.


    As soon as the squirrel was in there, I asked Wesseck ¡°Do you know where we left the shooting range targets? They¡¯re not rigged with a payload yet, but I want to make absolutely sure that the quill launching routines are functional.¡±


    Queen provided the round discs immediately as she replied ¡°Here they are.¡±


    I quickly started hanging up the targets on one end of the terrarium, connecting them to a piece of string so that they¡¯d be hanging in place for the squirrel to shoot at.


    As soon as that was done I closed the terrarium and sealed it tight to avoid any quills escaping, then used the remote control app to order the squirrel to fire at each target until it scored a bullseye. The next few seconds passed in a blur of flying quills as the squirrel opened fire and missed the vast majority of shots. At the end of the barrage nearly half the squirrel¡¯s quills were resting on the floor of the terrarium and the outer regions of each target were veritable pincushions, with each target having exactly one quill in its center zone.


    There were a few moments of silence before Queen noted ¡°Yures, I do believe you need to work on the fire control system, because that level of accuracy is absolutely abysmal.¡±


    Groaning, I agreed ¡°Yes, that¡¯s a fair complaint. I¡¯ll get right on it, but as it stands I think this was a decent proof-of-concept.¡±


    Wesseck took that opportunity to change the topic, noting ¡°Anyway, the plant is almost done printing. We should probably make sure it¡¯s doing ok.¡±


    Queen and I both nodded as we made our way to the active printer, where the bush was currently in its final stages of printing. I watched with interest as the undifferentiated tissue the printer was outputting rapidly reconfigured into the various leaves and branches of the bush, noting ¡°You did an excellent job on it from what I can see so far Wesseck.¡±


    Wesseck glowed at the praise, before noting ¡°Thanks! Just so you know, this prototype isn¡¯t starting with any explosives pre-synthesized. Mostly so that we wouldn¡¯t be in quite as much danger of blowing up our lab, but also so that we can make sure the photosynthetic pathway for PETN is working properly.¡±


    I nodded rapidly as the printer chimed to indicate that it was finished, saying ¡°That¡¯s much appreciated Wesseck. Anyway, let¡¯s get this plant into a terrarium. The really durable one with fifty centimeters of polycarbonate between us and anything exploding inside.¡±


    As I said that the lab drones immediately got to work, hauling the bush to its intended destination and firmly rooting it in the soil of the Terrarium for analysis. We looked over the nutrient uptake of the leaves, roots, and stem for several hours, carefully monitoring the plant¡¯s metabolism to ensure that the photosynthesis of PETN was operating as intended.


    As I looked at the carbon black leaves of our boomnut bush, I thought to ask ¡°Curiously, what did you two manage to get the total photosynthetic efficiency to? The PETN levels in this plant are going up quite quickly.¡±


    Wesseck cheerfully replied ¡°About ninety two percent, I think? It¡¯s nothing particularly special by Blackwood¡¯s standards in terms of total energy efficiency, but the direct photosynthesis of PETN without going through a bunch of other indirect synthetic pathways means that the boomnuts will finish maturing a fair bit faster than they otherwise would.¡±


    I briefly had a premonition of shattered lab equipment flying towards me at high velocity and asked ¡°Wesseck, what spectra does the bush not photosynthesize on?¡±


    Wesseck remarked ¡°Infra-red. Why?¡±


    In response I immediately called out ¡°Lighting spectra to infra-red only!¡± and the automated systems rapidly complied. I quickly set my eyes to the relevant spectra, seeing with relief that the accumulation of PETN in the boomnut bush had stopped. Though there were still several kilograms of explosive material in the terrarium that needed to be disposed of.


    I pinched the bridge of my nose, before noting ¡°We need to get better measures for disposing of explosive material set up. I¡¯m going to see about arranging a regular supply of replacement terrariums, and also see if we can get time reserved on a bomb range. Because if we set that off here we¡¯re going to trash our entire lab.¡±


    Wesseck winced at the realization, before apologizing ¡°Sorry, I was just so happy at having gotten the explosives synthesis working that I completely forgot to consider the implications of that.¡±


    Queen shrugged as she said ¡°It happens. You get a bit too excited with a new idea for your latest creation and the next thing you know it¡¯s rampaging through the streets. That¡¯s part of the reason for the tournament; it gives us an outlet for our talents that isn¡¯t quite as inconvenient for everyone else.¡±


    Wesseck cheered up a bit at the reassurances, even as I directed the lab drones to start packing up the boomnut bush for transport to a bomb range.


    The next several days of work saw several changes. My morph closet and Queen¡¯s lava tub both arrived and were installed. We got a time slot reserved on a bomb range just outside city limits, and then we started iterating on our designs for the boomnut bush, the archer squirrel, and our symbiotic microbe.


    However, we still had ten Megaseconds to go before the deployment time when Queen noted ¡°While we¡¯ve made great progress so far, I think we¡¯re operating off a horrible logical fallacy.¡±


    I looked up from the design console for the latest iteration on the squirrel, and asked ¡°Care to elaborate?¡±


    Queen nodded, before noting ¡°While we¡¯ve done a very good job optimizing our organisms from a simple numerical perspective, the fact of the matter it that we¡¯re not supposed to be playing a pure numbers game. We¡¯re supposed to be optimizing our organisms for survival in a very specific environment, and right now we need a lot more data on said environment before we can verify if our organisms will be able to survive. Especially given that I can¡¯t say whether the nanoweapon will be in any way effective without data on the immune systems it¡¯s going to be up against.¡±


    Wesseck thought for a moment, before noting ¡°I don¡¯t think encyclopedia files are going to be sufficient for this. We¡¯re going to have to do some more direct research, aren¡¯t we?¡±


    I nodded sadly in agreement as I thought of exactly what I was about to say ¡°We¡¯re going to need to send an expedition to Blackwood in order to collect samples of every single relevant organism in the region and transmit the data on them back to our lab. Still, if we¡¯re going to be headed down there let¡¯s make sure we do this correctly; it would be really unfortunate if we got laid up with a nanoweapon infection or something like that.¡±


    Wesseck noted ¡°I vote that we remain in orbit and synchronize with remote-operated bodies on Blackwood¡¯s surface. Yes that¡¯s going to introduce a bit of latency, but it also means that we¡¯ll be able to disconnect immediately if something goes wrong. All in favor?¡±


    I nodded emphatically, replying ¡°Yes, using drone bodies for this is definitely the way to go. Queen?¡±


    The dragon nodded calmly, saying ¡°Yes, I agree. Yures, would you please help me with organizing the preparations for our expedition?¡±


    I hummed, asking ¡°You want to handle getting the physical equipment lined up while I arrange the networking arrangements?¡±


    Queen shrugged and replied ¡°Sure. Is a synthmorph of your current body fine, or do you want a biomorph?¡±


    I thought for a moment, before replying ¡°For this expedition a synthmorph should be fine, thanks.¡±


    With that settled I quickly set about reserving some bandwidth from the array of satellites in close orbit over Blackwood, reserving a two-way channel for several terabits of data per second between the Thundersnow Steppes and our lab here on Bark. Still, the site for reserving network capacity also wanted a specific timeslot. So I called out to Queen ¡°Hey, when¡¯s the next launch window for sending a pod to the Thundersnow Steppes via the loops? I need to know when to reserve our signal time.¡±


    Queen replied almost immediately ¡°Two hundred and four kiloseconds from now.¡±


    I nodded and replied ¡°Thanks, Queen.¡±


    This is about when Wesseck spoke up, noting ¡°So, I¡¯ve decided to make myself useful while you¡¯re getting our equipment and such set up. Namely I¡¯ve downloaded all the encyclopedia files I could find about the ecosystem of the Thundersnow Steppes, so that we¡¯d at least have some clue what we were getting ourselves into when we went down there.¡±


    I smiled at Wesseck¡¯s support, saying ¡°Good job Wesseck, it¡¯s greatly appreciated. Anywhere, a few more moments and I should have the bandwidth request registered.¡±


    Sure enough, shortly afterwards the website confirmed that we had our bandwidth requisition set up at the same time as Queen asked ¡°Yures, is it acceptable if I set your remote body to be androgynous? We don¡¯t know what gender you¡¯ll be during the expedition, so I¡¯d like to minimize your possible discomfort.¡±


    I nodded at Queen¡¯s logic, noting ¡°That¡¯s probably for the best, thank you Queen.¡±


    Queen tapped a few keys on her console, then said ¡°Alright, the order is in and our launch date is set. You know what this means?¡±


    I hazarded a guess ¡°Obsessive virtual reality training for an expedition to Blackwood so that we can actually get some good data before our remote bodies get trashed or our time slot runs out?¡±


    Queen grinned the menacing grin that only someone with a mouth full of very sharp teeth could pull off, even as she replied ¡°That is exactly correct, Yures.¡±


    And so that¡¯s what we did for most of two days, navigating a simulated version of the Thundersnow Steppes as we learned how to handle ourselves on Blackwood¡¯s surface, especially with a quarter second of total latency slowing down our reactions massively.


    To put it quite bluntly, we died a lot during our training exercises. The latency made reacting to sudden ambushes effectively impossible, and the creatures we were up against were all too happy to exploit this weakness. So we learned to be cautious, carefully measuring our actions to minimize exposure to the lifeforms of our target biome.


    By the point where we¡¯d run out of training time, we¡¯d managed to get a couple runs where we survived for multiple hours despite our handicaps. So, now that we were as ready as we were ever going to be, it was time to get ready for the expedition.


    Synchronizing to our bodies in the deployment pod was the work of a few seconds, and I noted over the internal chat client ¡°Everyone all settled in?¡±


    Wesseck and Queen both confirmed, and moments later the pod started accelerating down the launch track built around Bark.


    With a kerchunk, we detached from the launch track and started drifting towards Blackwood. After a moment, I thought to ask ¡°Queen, you did shell out for a helicopter, right?¡±


    Queen replied almost immediately ¡°Yes I did; I figured we¡¯d need to get around the Steppes in a hurry, and a helicopter was one of the best options for ensuring we¡¯d be able to do that if we needed to.¡±


    The rest of the trip passed in silence until our pod hit the atmosphere. We experienced around three gees of acceleration as our capsule aerobraked to an effective stand-still, dumping its kinetic energy as heat until it was safe to ditch the fairing. With a pop of explosive bolts the capsule burst open and our helicopter began shifting from its storage configuration to flight mode. The rotors spun up until they reached an indiscernible blur even as our descent halted at around two kilometers of altitude over the Thundersnow Steppes, leaving us inside a storm cloud.


    I idly noted the helicopter¡¯s onboard computer sounding out the obligatory ¡°Welcome to Blackwood¡± message, as there were more important things to worry about.


    Case in point, we needed to double check that all our equipment had survived the orbital transfer intact. Quickly we started digging through the storage compartment, verifying the presence of five dart rifles, around two thousand tissue sample darts, dozens of support drones, and a few other miscellaneous pieces of gear we would be extremely glad to have available.


    As soon as that was done, it was Wesseck who spoke up, saying ¡°Alright, we¡¯ve got all our equipment and it seems to be in good working order. Now let¡¯s get out of this cloud cover so we can see what¡¯s going on.¡±

 Field Research

    As our helicopter descended through the cloud cover, I asked ¡°Do you two think we can risk using the active radar to find a safe location before the helicopter leaves the clouds, or does that put us at too much risk of alerting an aerial predator that¡¯s sensitive to such things?¡±


    Wesseck raised the point ¡°Our helicopter isn¡¯t exactly quiet. Chances are that any organisms that would notice or care about a radar pulse already know we¡¯re here.¡±


    Queen replied almost immediately ¡°I¡¯m in agreement with Wesseck. Fire the active radar.¡±


    Unlike our conversation about whether to use the radar ¨C which had the advantage of our brains all still being in the same room ¨C there was a quarter second of lag between deciding to fire the radar and us receiving the information on what exactly it uncovered.


    Still, the radar pulse very rapidly revealed a detailed topographical map of the Thundersnow Steppes below us. The terrain was a mix of flat ground and gashes in the terrain from stray shots fired in a previous war, with low-lying plant cover across all of it.


    As we looked over the details of the terrain, Queen noted ¡°I vote we take this as a grid. We want to get a representative sample of the flora and fauna we¡¯re up against, and focusing too heavily on one specific section probably isn¡¯t too helpful. I figure we should bag a set number of organism varieties from each square, then move on to the next one.¡±


    I chimed in with ¡°Sixty four squares seems like a reasonable number, start in the north-east and make our way to the south-west.¡±


    There was a pause before I noted ¡°That said we¡¯ve only got like forty kiloseconds until our bandwidth reservation times out, so maybe a time limit before moving to the next square instead of a bag limit would make more sense?¡±


    Wesseck and Queen both agreed that yes, that was the most logical course of action, and I directed our helicopter to the north east.


    En route, I familiarized myself with the dart guns. They were subsonic coil guns used to launch tissue sample darts nearly silently, with active driver coils in the barrel powered by a superconducting magnetic storage torus in the stock. There was a ten round box magazine for darts, and notably the darts were equipped with guidance packages that would allow them to home in on the organism they were targeted at. On impact they¡¯d suck out a cubic centimeter of whatever bodily fluids they happened to impact at the same time as they fired a high-intensity Magnetic Resonance Imaging pulse. This would get us both a sample of the target¡¯s cells if we could recover the dart, and a detailed scan of what their internals were like.


    Of all these features I was particularly pleased with the guidance package, since it would help compensate for the latency throwing off our aim. We also all had an aim-bot program that would run drone-side, but having multiple means of compensation was a very good thing in this case.


    Musings aside, soon we were over square A1 and I noted ¡°Well, let¡¯s see what we can shoot from here.¡± as I turned my chair towards the left side door of our helicopter and slid it open.


    My hopes and dreams sank as I quickly picked out something down below that I¡¯d really hoped not to have to deal with. I zoomed in with the scope of my dart gun to double check, and groaned when I saw what was there, noting ¡°Guys, we¡¯ve got a flock of laser goats just to our east. We need to be careful.¡±


    Queen frowned for a moment before asking ¡°Here, really?¡±


    Wesseck shrugged, noting ¡°The basic formula¡¯s practically ubiquitous on Blackwood. Get an herbivore that travels in herds, give them all laser guns and programming to collectively fry anything that even might be a predator, and you¡¯ve got a critter that¡¯s damned hard to prey on without absolute stealth on the approach, swarm tactics, a ranged attack of their own, or a downright stupid amount of armor. Figures we¡¯d find the local variant.¡±


    I idly mused ¡°I¡¯m thinking that maybe we should give the squirrels indirect fire capability on account of that, but right now all I know is that I really want to make sure we get a sample from them. Think we can spare a drone to spot for some beyond-visual-range shooting?¡±


    Queen idly noted ¡°We did bring dozens of them along. Might as well.¡± even as she ordered the helicopter to dip down behind a small piece of raised terrain.


    A minute or two passed as one of our drones got into position. I waited for the signal that we had a clear shot, and as soon as it was feasible I marked the herd of laser goats as targets for the sample darts in my magazine. Then I ordered my body to take aim and fire.


    The dart gun kicked ten times, sending the tissue sample darts whistling through the air for several seconds. I was nervous about the laser goats possibly spotting and intercepting the darts, but I needn¡¯t have worried. They didn¡¯t notice the projectiles approaching until one had already embedded itself in the flank of one of their females, and by the time they¡¯d whirled around to start shooting them down five more had already impacted.


    As we got the data back from the MRI pulses I squealed in delight, even as I asked ¡°Can we send the drones in to pick up the darts now?¡±


    Queen hummed, before noting ¡°Best to wait for a bit. There¡¯s no sense wasting drones and we¡¯ve already spooked the herd, so it¡¯s probably best to wait for them to move on before we retrieve the samples.


    On his part, Wesseck noted ¡°Anyway, I see some flocks of birds flying overhead. We can dart some of those while we wait for the laser goats to relocate.¡±


    What followed was a rather enjoyable day spent flying around on our helicopter and shooting darts at wildlife while also collecting samples of the local plants and fungi for examination.


    We collected samples from bugs, beasts, birds, bushes, brambles, and many other taxa of life form found in the Thundersnow Steppes. There were several near misses where a particular organism nearly cut our expedition short, but most of these were relatively easy to deal with.


    First was an assault by a flock of thousands of birds after we unwittingly disturbed their nesting sites. They were clawing and biting at the hull of out helicopter and repeatedly shocking it with electric currents from their talons as they tried to bring us down. While several were killed instantly on contact with the rotor blade keeping us aloft, most of them were being really quite successful in their attempts to cause us grief.


    We were actually quite worried about how we were going to get out of this one intact before Queen noted ¡°I can deal with this. Wesseck, open the door.¡±


    Our arachnid companion did so, only for a massive blast of flame to erupt from Queen¡¯s mouth as she marched forwards. Shortly thereafter she started clambering around the outside of the helicopter¡¯s hull, incinerating any of the birds that dared to come any closer until they eventually withdrew. Smiling, Queen climbed back inside as she noted ¡°It¡¯s a good thing they left when they did; my flamethrower almost ran out of fuel. Anyway, look what I managed to get?¡± as she held up two filled tissue sample vials from the birds.


    The next troublesome encounter we had was actually with a plant. It was a small thorn-covered bush with a dense lump on the top, and I found myself idly musing ¡°You know, I kind of wonder what this particular plant actually does.¡± as one of our drones advanced towards it. The drone had barely even touched the leaves before that knob on top exploded with great force, completely demolishing the drone and sending seeds careening through the air at several times the speed of sound. A few put pockmarks in our helicopter¡¯s windshield, but all in all we got off surprisingly light.


    In the aftermath of the blast Wesseck turned to me and said ¡°Yures, repeat after me. No. More. Tempting. Fate.¡±


    I shrugged and replied ¡°I¡¯ll try to remember¡± even as I sent another drone to retrieve any useful information from the wreckage of the exploding bush.


    Our third encounter was a sleeping bear in its den, hidden from an easy firing angle for darts by a quirk of the terrain. There was a brief pause as we considered what to do, before Queen noted ¡°Just send a drone to poke it with some darts, we don¡¯t have to go down there ourselves.¡±


    A few moments later, that bear was awake and absolutely pissed, charging after us even as we undertook desperate evasive maneuvers in the helicopter to avoid repeated shots from the mag guns that the bear had mounted on either side of its head.


    After a few minutes of frantic dodging and weaving, we finally got out of range of that railgun bear. Sighing with relief at not having been abruptly shot out of the sky and very happy with the data we¡¯d recovered about its behavior, biochemistry, and anatomy.


    Encounter number four was a hive of incredibly angry eusocial insects, patterned vaguely on ants. Fortunately they couldn¡¯t fly, but unfortunately they proved to have some horrendously destructive secretions, meaning that the ones we captured were most of the way through melting their way out of the bottle before we got them into the destructive analyzer.


    Still, we did get them in there, and we got very important information on the hazards posed by the ants on the Steppes.


    It wasn¡¯t until we ran into a flock of Brose¡¯s Wyverns that things really took a turn for the worse. Our first warning that we¡¯d attracted their attention was the helicopter¡¯s radar, as Queen noted ¡°Four bogeys coming in fast. Can¡¯t tell what they are yet, but they definitely know we¡¯re here and they¡¯re coming right towards us.¡±If you come across this story on Amazon, it''s taken without permission from the author. Report it.


    That¡¯s when I made a terrible mistake, asking ¡°Could you take us down out of the cloud cover so we can see what they are? They¡¯ve apparently got some degree of radar stealth given that you can¡¯t identify them.¡±


    Queen replied with apprehension in her voice ¡°Alright, but I¡¯m pretty worried about this course of action.¡±


    And so the helicopter descended until once again poking out below the clouds. This gave us our first clear visuals on the creatures, revealing majestic winged organisms covered in scales. We barely had enough time to register what we were seeing before actinic lines of searing energy flashed across the sky and blasted the mounting for our helicopter¡¯s rotor into pieces.


    Immediately afterwards, we began to fall. There were a few moments of weightlessness as we approached the ground, then with a horrible SLAM we smashed down onto the hard terrain of the Thundersnow Steppes.


    I hauled myself to my feet and asked ¡°Is everyone still able to get up and move?¡±


    Queen groaned in pain before she replied ¡°Yes, unfortunately.¡± even as Wesseck replied ¡°Two limbs are broken, but I should still be able to get up and move.¡±


    I thought quickly as I nodded in acknowledgment. Then I glanced out the cracked and warped window of the helicopter to see that the quartet of dragons had touched down not too far from our crash site, and were cautiously approaching. Seeing this, I noted ¡°Guys, these bodies aren¡¯t going to make it out of this encounter intact, so our expedition is probably over soon. The only thing that matters at this point is getting data on those wyverns, no matter the cost.¡±


    Queen nodded too as she readied one of the dart rifles and got all four surviving drones into position, replying ¡°Got it Yures. See you at the lab.¡±


    And so we readied our dart guns, sticking the muzzles just barely out of the helicopter door before opening fire.


    The group of Wyverns reacted with blinding speed, dodging out of the way of the later darts even as they batted the first bunch away with their wings to prevent them from penetrating. Dart after dart flew downrange, and I immediately noted ¡°We can¡¯t keep this up and we¡¯re running out of ammo! Queen, how much flamethrower fuel do you have left?¡±


    To this Queen answered ¡°Enough for a smokescreen!¡± before blasting out a jet of flame to ignite the extremely flammable Blazegrass covering the Steppes.


    The grass immediately lit up into a massive conflagration, flames spreading across the area with shocking speed and producing a thick black cloud of hot smoke that was opaque to both the infra-red and visual bands.


    Immediately I activated my drone¡¯s built-in sonar to penetrate the concealment of the fog before telling Queen and Wesseck ¡°Charge them, we¡¯re going to try forcing the darts in manually.¡±


    And so we advanced through the smoke, closing the distance with the Wyverns as fast as we possibly could. Unfortunately they seem to have heard our approach and were in no mood to co-operate, as they had already taken to the air and were trying to blow the smoke away using their wingbeats.


    Seeing this, Wesseck told Queen ¡°Throw me! You and Yures can both fly, but I can¡¯t!¡± even as the swarms of drones were already taking to the sky.


    Queen rapidly obliged, grabbing Wesseck before hauling back and hurling them at the flock of Wyverns with all her might before she hurled herself off the ground as well.


    Wesseck barely got halfway before all four Wyverns turned their electron beam weapons on them, opening fire with all their weaponry even as the drones fell away one by one. Wesseck¡¯s remote body was reduced to scrap near-instantly, and we could hear them through the comms net as they noted ¡°It¡¯s up to you two. I¡¯m done.¡±


    A mere moment later, Queen slammed into the lead Brose¡¯s Wyvern as she burst from the smoke cover, grabbing on with her talons in one hand even as with her other she forcibly rammed a handful of sample darts into the Wyvern¡¯s chest.


    Immediately Wesseck called out ¡°We¡¯ve got the structural scan, now get those samples to the analyzer!¡±


    Unfortunately, before that could happen the Wyvern that Queen was grappling with bit down on her neck and fired its electron beam. Queen started flailing helplessly as her remote body¡¯s internal functions were disrupted, and from my position on the ground I could do nothing but watch helplessly as the wyverns ripped my friend apart, the sample darts lodged securely in the chest of their target.


    Thinking fast, I asked Wesseck ¡°Can you command the sample darts to retract their needles? They¡¯re not coming out and the wyverns are distracted right now.¡±


    Wesseck replied over the network ¡°Got it. Sending the command now.¡±


    Immediately afterwards I spotted the darts starting to fall towards the ground, and I managed to catch two of them before I started making a mad dash towards the downed helicopter. The wyverns were distracted for now, but that wouldn¡¯t last; Queen¡¯s remote had been reduced to so much scrap, and the remaining drones that were offering me cover were being rapidly depleted.


    Still, I made it into the passenger cabin with a bit of time to spare, and slotted the darts into the still-functioning parts of the analyzer as I frantically considered the situation.


    That¡¯s when Queen noted through our chat server ¡°The analyzer still needs forty seconds to send us all the biochemical data! Get back out there and distract the Wyverns for as long as you can, Yures.¡±


    I was already reloading my dart gun as I sent back ¡°Got it.¡± and dashed back out of the door just in time to see the last three drones getting blasted out of the sky by the electron beam fire the wyverns could bring to bear.


    I kept running. I wanted to put as much distance between me and the Wyverns as possible before I drew their attention, and there was conveniently an area of smoke remaining from earlier to conceal myself in. However, I never got there as Queen warned me ¡°The wyverns are aiming at the helicopter!¡±


    I immediately turned and fired. That very same instant all four of the wyverns turned their attention on me, and I found myself getting summarily fried by their electron beams.


    Figuring I was done, I logged out of the remote body client and found my perspective back in our lab. I asked ¡°How much time left on the analyzer getting everything?¡±


    Immediately Wesseck brought up a visual representation of the progress bar and noted ¡°About twenty seconds to go, and with how much attention the Wyverns are spending on your wreckage they¡¯ll probably not get back to the helicopter before it¡¯s done.¡±


    And so we watched with trepidation as the Wyverns inspected my wreckage for a few seconds, before finally turning towards the downed helicopter with twelve seconds to spare. Still, with how cautious they were being about the approach, the analyzer was more than done with its upload by the time the Wyverns reached the helicopter.


    As we shut down the data stream, Queen noted ¡°Well, I¡¯d say that was a very successful expedition when you consider everything that happened. We got good data on thousands of lifeforms in the area we¡¯ll be competing in, we massively improved our ability to operate as a team, and we kept the mission going for most of its originally planned timeframe. I say this calls for a celebration.¡±


    Wesseck chimed in with a great amount of cheer in his voice ¡°I vote for ice cream! We can do other things too, but ice cream absolutely has to be part of the celebration, no exceptions.¡±


    I chuckled for a moment at Wesseck¡¯s enthusiasm, before asking ¡°How about we go over the data we collected over ice cream? Maybe with a board game afterwards?¡±


    Wesseck mulled it over for a few moments, before they replied ¡°Yures, I know you¡¯re really gung-ho about getting every possible bit of work time in for the competition, but I¡¯m pretty much spent for today. I¡¯ve just spent several kiloseconds in a highly stressful environment, and I just need some time to recover from that. Ice cream and a board game is fine right now, work isn¡¯t.¡±


    Queen nodded thoughtfully as Wesseck described their position, before agreeing ¡°Wesseck¡¯s right, the last several hours have been really stressful for the both of us. Yures, we need to take breaks or we¡¯re going to drive ourselves into a fit.¡±


    Sighing, I took a metaphorical step back and actually took a critical look at my own state right now. After a few moments of reflection, I replied ¡°Yeah, you¡¯re right about needing some time to recover. I don¡¯t know what I was thinking when I suggested that we go right to checking over the data, but it really wasn¡¯t the best of ideas.¡±


    Queen shrugged as she started looking through our collection for a suitable board game, noting ¡°You were excited about all the new data we managed to gather, it happens. Anyway, would you rather a co-operative boardgame, or a competitive one? Personally my vote is for co-operative.¡±


    Wesseck was already on his way back from the kitchen with several large tubs of freshly made ice cream, replying ¡°Co-op please. I don¡¯t think I could handle anything competitive right now.¡±


    I nodded in agreement, saying ¡°Same here. It¡¯s got to be a team game or it¡¯s just not going to be any fun right now.¡±


    Queen thought for a moment, before asking ¡°In that case, does anyone have any objections to playing Virus right now?¡±


    That¡¯s when Wesseck chimed in as they set the ice cream tubs around the table, noting ¡°I have one objection: I don¡¯t want to get ice cream all over the game board while we¡¯re playing. Why don¡¯t we eat first?¡±


    I immediately replied ¡°I¡¯ve got no real objections to doing that.¡± even as I sat down at the table and picked out a tub of ice cream for myself. I took the first bite, savoring the vaguely minty flavor for a few moments before I asked Queen ¡°You coming?¡±


    Queen nodded as she sat down, simply noting ¡°Sorry, I was a bit sidetracked for a moment. Curiously, would either of you happen to know someone by the name of Veronica Machinae?¡±


    I blinked in mild surprise and thought for a moment, before answering ¡°Yeah, we were in microfauna lab together. Why?¡±


    Queen answered as she jammed a spoon in her tub of ice cream ¡°She¡¯s entered the invasive species tournament too, and she was wondering if I¡¯d be willing to join her team.¡± There was a brief pause before Queen continued ¡°I told her I¡¯d already got one, and wished her luck in the tournament.¡± as a smile crossed her face.


    I chuckled at that, before replying ¡°Careful with that sort of talk, she always said luck was the last resort of those who couldn¡¯t rely on skill.¡±


    Queen threw back her head in laughter as she replied ¡°I know, right? It¡¯s the perfect trash talk to get her all riled up, and even better she can¡¯t call us on it because it¡¯s also wishing her well.¡±


    Wesseck looked slightly confused at this, before asking ¡°I know that trash talk is kind of a tradition and it doesn¡¯t make much sense to help our opponents, but do we really have to? Can¡¯t we please be a team with more class than that?¡±


    I hummed for a moment, before replying ¡°Sure, we can knock it off with the trash talk. Still, it¡¯s interesting to know that Veronica¡¯s also in the contest. Did she say which category she registered for?¡±


    Queen double-checked the message, before saying ¡°Yeah, get this, she chose an air-based predator for the Thundersnow Steppes.¡±


    I blinked in mild surprise, before returning to my ice cream as I mulled over that. I mean, we knew there would be other competitors entering organisms in the same region as us, but for it to be someone we knew was slightly unexpected.


    The remainder of the evening passed without much fanfare. We all enjoyed the ice cream Wesseck had picked out for us, and once it was gone I noted ¡°Well, I guess it¡¯s time for a game of Virus, if everyone¡¯s ready for it?¡±


    The cleaning drones were already removing our ice cream tubs and spoons as well as wiping up the table. After a few moments, Wesseck said ¡°I¡¯ll be completely honest with you¡­ I¡¯m just not feeling in a board-gamey mood. Sorry for changing my mind so much, but it¡¯s just how things are right now. You two can play if you want.¡±


    I thought for a moment, before noting ¡°Virus really needs three players and I don¡¯t particularly feel like copying myself just for a board game, so I guess that¡¯s off. Is there anything you do want to do?¡±


    Wesseck thought for a moment, before asking ¡°Could we just watch a movie or something? Some nice passive entertainment would be great right now, and the total immersion of an experience recording is just too much.¡±


    Queen thought for a moment, before asking ¡°Would a rom-com work for both of you?¡±


    I smiled at the thought, before replying ¡°Yeah. I¡¯ll probably be wanting to swap bodies before things get started, but a rom-com sounds just fine.¡±


    Wesseck nodded slowly as they munched on a candy bar they pulled from somewhere or other, agreeing ¡°Yeah, I could go for a movie about some people being hilariously bad at falling in love. That sounds like exactly what I need to de-stress from all that time we spent on Blackwood.¡±

 The Opposition

    In a lab on the other side of the Cthonic Mare, Veronica was fuming. ¡°Wishing me good luck? How dare she! She knows I take pride in not needing luck to do anything, so to deliberately throw that back at me is incredibly rude.¡±


    Looking up from her workstation, Rat commented ¡°I still don¡¯t get why you¡¯re so upset about it. Yeah Queen¡¯s competing against us, but it¡¯s not like she¡¯s trash-talking us or anything. She wished us well.¡±


    Veronica twitched slightly, before she marched on over to Rat¡¯s side of the lab and said ¡°Rat, that is in fact trash talk. Queen knows me well enough to know exactly how I¡¯d respond to this, and that just makes it even worse.¡±


    Rat blinked in a distinctly unimpressed manner, before asking ¡°if you know it¡¯s a problem and you know why Queen did it, then why keep playing into her hands? We both know that you getting all riled up like this isn¡¯t going to solve anything. Would a change of topic help?¡±


    Veronica thought for a moment, before ultimately agreeing ¡°You know, it probably would. How¡¯s work going on the laser organ?¡±


    Rat smiled as she replied ¡°I¡¯m glad you asked! Anyway, I¡¯ve ultimately decided to go for a fiber laser setup. It¡¯s easier to cool, more damage tolerant, more efficient, and offers the best beam quality available. Most of this is pretty standard, but I¡¯m having a bit of trouble with the beam combiner module.¡±


    Veronica thought for a moment, before asking ¡°Mind if I have a look at it?¡±


    Rat shrugged as she passed the tablet, and Veronica started picking over the work, before asking ¡°Big question, were you going to try using a turreted beam director system where the entire emitter pivots, or were you aiming for something more like an adaptive optics system?¡±


    Rat immediately replied ¡°Adaptive optics. Yeah an eyeball turret would probably be at least a little easier to implement, but it has a few downsides that an adaptive optics system just wouldn¡¯t. Still, I¡¯m having trouble with the lens buckling in ways it isn¡¯t supposed to.¡±


    Veronica looked over Rat¡¯s design for a moment, before saying ¡°Yeah, your choice of material here is the problem. It¡¯s just a bit too ductile for what we need here, and that¡¯s what¡¯s causing the warping problems. Personally I¡¯d say that we should reduce the branching in the polymers a bit; that would firm the lens up enough to stop the buckling issue without too much trouble.¡±


    Veronica made the edits, before passing the tablet back to Rat. Looking it over, Rat noted ¡°This seems like it should work. Now it¡¯s just a question of integrating it into our birds.¡±


    Veronica shook her head for a moment before noting ¡°Gotta do some real world testing first, and that means printing it in an organ box and seeing if it¡¯ll fire.¡±


    And so the two of them set the bio printers working away on their laser organ. As the printer churned, Rat asked ¡°So, now that we know Queen isn¡¯t available, who else could we get? We know we need an immune system person at the very least, or our critter is going to get utterly wrecked by feral nanoweapons the instant it¡¯s released into the wild.¡±


    Running her fingers through her long, dark hair, Veronica groaned ¡°I don¡¯t know. Queen was the only person I knew on a personal level who specialized in microbiology and she¡¯s on another team right now.¡±


    Rat¡¯s whiskers wiggled as she thought for a few moments, before noting ¡°I suppose we could put out an ad on the network and see if anyone comes through. It¡¯s a slight statistical long-shot at this point in time, but it could work.¡±


    Veronica nodded as she said ¡°That seems like our most workable option, let me write up a draft for a personal ad real quick.¡±


    A few minutes passed as Veronica typed up the advertisement, before passing it to Rat with a query of ¡°Well, what do you think?¡±


    Idly nibbling on some fish jerky, Rat read Veronica¡¯s draft aloud ¡°Wanted: third team member for Blackwood Invasive Species Tournament, assisting with design of an airborne predator for deployment to the Thundersnow Steppes. Microbiology expertise required.¡±


    There were a few moments of silence before Rat sighed and said ¡°Well, the first thing you did wrong is that you made it sound like this person would be a subordinate when you used the words ¡®assisting with¡¯. People are usually in it for the glory and bragging rights when they sign up for the invasive species tournament, so no-one¡¯s going to join up if they think they¡¯re going to be a mere assistant.¡±


    You could have almost heard the breaking noise as Veronica¡¯s train of thought derailed, leaving her with a completely blank expression as she replied ¡°Oh.¡±


    Rat broke the awkward silence after a moment by saying ¡°Anyway, I think I can fix this to be more appealing to a prospective team-mate. All we¡¯d need to do is change the words ¡®assist with¡¯ to instead say ¡®contribute to¡¯. The rest is actually pretty decent, all things considered.¡±


    Veronica looked over the revised personal advertisement for a few moments, before saying ¡°Well, this is probably going to do. Let¡¯s send it off.¡± and clicking the option to send the request.


    The two of them spent the next several kiloseconds on fine-tuning their bird¡¯s beak geometry and composition for the prey it was expected to eat.


    They didn¡¯t have to wait long before a response arrived from an individual calling themselves Togi Sorresh, reading ¡°Hello! I heard you were in need of a microbiologist for your team in the Invasive Species Tournament, and I was hoping you¡¯d take me on. I¡¯m quite skilled with work on the cellular and immunological levels, so I¡¯d be a perfect pick.¡±


    Rat and Veronica mulled over bringing Togi aboard, firing up a chat client and starting to talk with Togi about whether his qualifications were actually all they were cracked up to be.


    Unbeknownst to Rat and Veronica, Togi was most emphatically the worst possible choice of team-mate, but not due to any lack of skill on his part. Even as he was chatting up his marks into letting him join, his gaze kept drifting to a piece of paper he kept pinned up on his bedroom wall that simply read ¡°EVIL PLAN: RUIN BLACKWOOD TOURNAMENT¡±


    Of course, Veronica Machinae and her team-mate Rat knew nothing of this, naively sending ¡°Mind providing some credentials? No offense, but we¡¯d like to know just who we¡¯re dealing with.¡±


    Togi replied without the slightest hint of audible smugness ¡°No problem, sending my degree now.¡± before sending in a copy of his graduation certificate from Skyfountain University. No need to lie about this, his actual degree would probably be sufficient.


    This was confirmed by Veronica¡¯s next reply of ¡°Sure thing, come on over and welcome to the team.¡± followed by the address of their laboratory.


    Seeing this, Togi pumped one of his four arms as he ticked off one step from his evil plan. After all, he was part of a team in the tournament now, giving him much better access to what he¡¯d need in order to implement the rest of his plan.


    When Togi arrived in person shortly thereafter, Veronica greeted him with ¡°Hello, Togi. Want me to show you around the lab? We were just getting for dinner if you¡¯d rather do that.¡±


    Togi smiled with false amicability, noting ¡°I¡¯d rather do my own exploring, but thank you for the offer. I¡¯ll meet you for dinner after showing myself around.¡± what he most pointedly did not say was that he¡¯d have a much easier time hiding certain items he didn¡¯t want his teammates to find if he went exploring on his own, compared to if he got a tour.


    Meanwhile, Veronica most pointedly did not say that making everyone else wait for dinner was kind of rude, and she also refrained from commenting on Togi¡¯s extremely spiky steel-and-leather fashion sense. Rat also refrained from making similar comments.


    Instead, the two of them said ¡°Well, go ahead and claim a room I guess. See you at dinner eventually.¡±


    Togi bowed slightly and almost pricked Rat with his spiked shoulder pads before replying ¡°I will do so. See you there.¡±


    Of course, Togi already knew the layout of the building from looking it up on a municipal government website before he got here, so he already knew where the bedrooms were relative to the lab. Climbing up the stairs to the second level he swiftly found Veronica and Rat¡¯s rooms before picking one out for himself.


    Next he started unloading some of his personal bio-engineering equipment. Protein synthesizers, various molecular encoding systems, and more quickly cluttered up his desk behind an obscuring screen of random knickknacks. That done, he made his way back down to the kitchen and asked ¡°So, what¡¯s for dinner?¡±


    Wordlessly, Rat gestured to the pot of freshly cooked pasta on the stove.


    Togi wandered over that way in search of food, idly noting Veronica calling out ¡°There¡¯s meatballs too if you want them!¡± as he started to serve himself.


    A few moments later Togi had his food ready and sat down at the table as he asked ¡°So, you¡¯ve been working on your organism submission for a while prior to me joining in. Mind telling me what you¡¯ve got in more detail?¡±


    Veronica shrugged as she answered ¡°We¡¯re making a laser armed bird of prey. Been considering what sorts of additional features we can cram into it, but it definitely needs an immune system no matter what.¡±The narrative has been illicitly obtained; should you discover it on Amazon, report the violation.


    Togi smiled as he finished chewing and swallowing his first bite of dinner, replying ¡°Well, that¡¯s what you got me for isn¡¯t it? You needed someone who knows their way around immune systems and here I am, ready to provide exactly that service as requested.¡±


    There were a few moments of silence before Veronica uttered a sentence she would regret in retrospect, saying ¡°Glad to have you on the team, Togi. I look forward to seeing what we can create together.¡±


    Togi smiled knowingly as he replied ¡°I¡¯m looking forward to finding that out too.¡±


    There were a few minutes of silent eating before Rat noted ¡°Actually, if you want to look over our organism design so far, here it is.¡± as she slid a tablet full of data over towards Togi¡¯s side of the table.


    Togi accepted the tablet with a simple ¡°Many thanks.¡± before he started reading through it, producing the somewhat incongruous image of a vaguely menacing four-armed man dressed entirely in black leather and spikes intently reading the contents of a bubblegum pink tablet covered in flower stickers.


    The rest of dinner passed smoothly, Togi taking the tablet up to his room as he noted ¡°I¡¯m going to try and get a bit of work in before bed and see what I can get done on your bird¡¯s immune system.¡±


    As he turned to leave, Veronica asked ¡°Don¡¯t you mean our bird? You¡¯re part of our team now too, so you should have an equal claim to it.¡±


    Togi smiled wryly as he insincerely agreed ¡°Right, our bird. I¡¯ll have to remember that.¡± before thundering off to his room.


    The instant he got there, he locked the door and connected the tablet to his personal computer as he noted ¡°Right, let¡¯s see what sort of botch job these two dupes made on the immune system.¡±


    It only took Togi a few minutes to spot several flaws in the laser falcon¡¯s defenses against hostile nanoweapons, but his overall opinion of the system as it currently stood was a simple ¡°That¡¯s actually a fairly competent immune system from people who aren¡¯t specialized in them. I¡¯d have to be some sort of genius at nanoweapon design to close those security holes without breaking my own exploits¡­ oh wait, I am.¡±


    And so Togi worked on into the night, adjusting the immune system of the falcons to suit his needs.


    Come morning, he presented a slightly edited version of his work with the incriminating comments removed, passing the tablet back to Rat as he said ¡°Well, here¡¯s what I¡¯ve got for the immune system so far. It¡¯s obviously a work in progress, but I¡¯d like to know what you think of it.¡±


    Rat accepted the tablet and started going through it, Togi carefully observing her reactions during every moment that followed. Rat¡¯s expression stayed thoughtful and moderately impressed for several moments, before abruptly switching to slight concern as she noted ¡°Togi, it seems like you¡¯ve left a gaping security hole in the adaptive immune system. There¡¯s an entire major category of antigens that it¡¯s going to completely ignore, meaning any nanoweapon built with them will be able to sneak in without resistance.¡±


    As Togi took the tablet back, he commented ¡°I thought you said you weren¡¯t really all that great at immunology?¡±


    Rat shrugged, before noting ¡°I mean, yeah? Immune systems aren¡¯t really area of specialty, but I passed all the required courses on them and still remember most of it.¡±


    Togi noted down that information as he carefully looked over the highlighted points in the plans for the immune system, while also checking on the actual exploits he¡¯d left in. After determining that only one of the deliberate security holes had been detected, Togi replied truthfully ¡°To be honest I just didn¡¯t get to that part yet. It¡¯s only been less than a day since I joined the team, so I just haven¡¯t had time to get to it yet.¡±


    Rat idly prodded her breakfast with a spoon for a few minutes before replying ¡°I guess that¡¯s something to take into consideration. Still, going to want to take a look at things to double check, just in case.¡±


    Inside his mind, Togi was rapidly reassessing how much of a threat Veronica and Rat were to his plans. They knew just enough about immune systems that they stood a serious chance of uncovering his plot, and with their insistence on double-checking everything those chances were compounded even further.


    Togi chewed his cereal slowly and deliberately as he tried to come up with a vaguely workable method of hiding his actions from his ¡°teammates¡± for the remainder of the competition. Simply continuing as he had done had far too much of a chance of getting called out on leaving deliberate security holes, so he¡¯d need to act proactively to either keep that from happening, or mitigate the damage when it happened.


    Then Togi glanced over to where Veronica was currently checking over the bird¡¯s flight characteristics for the fortieth time, and he figured out exactly what he needed to do.


    On Veronica¡¯s part, she was currently in a very good mood. She¡¯d mapped out the aerodynamic forces needed to keep the bird in stable flight at quite extreme speeds, and even better it turned out that the lower end of the respiratory tract had enough room to install an afterburner. Sure that meant the feathers had to be fireproofed, but being able to accelerate to supersonic speeds for short bursts would be an extremely useful ability for an airborne predator to have.


    After a few minutes of mixed work and eating, Veronica asked ¡°So, pretty sure I¡¯ve gotten the airspeed on this bird up to mach 2. Can anyone see any obvious problems with it?¡±


    When Rat took a look at the tablet, she looked over the adjustments to the multi-modal biological jet engine Veronica had managed to cram into their bird before saying ¡°You did a good job there Veronica, this bird is about as fast as we could have possibly wished for, really agile, and the fuel consumption is low enough to keep up those speeds for almost a kilosecond if it really needs to.¡±


    Veronica smiled at the praise before saying ¡°Thank you! Making sure those tissues could handle that level of heat and pressure was a massive hassle, but I got it working eventually.¡±


    That¡¯s when Togi spoke up and asked ¡°Can I take a look at it? I want to see what you did with that bird, maybe point out some improvements.¡±


    Rat shrugged and replied ¡°Sure.¡± before handing the tablet over to Togi.


    Togi hummed as he looked over it for a moment, before saying ¡°Should have been rated for mach three at the very least, you can do better.¡±


    Veronica¡¯s response was a flat ¡°What.¡± before she explained ¡°Togi, there¡¯s no more room to make our bird go mach three. A sizable portion of the chest cavity is already taken up by the laser weapon, we had to completely assimilate the respiratory system into the jet engine to get enough airflow for combustion, and if we make either of those systems any bigger there won¡¯t be any room for the cardiovasular, digestive, excretory, or reproductive systems. Not to mention important metabolic organs like the liver and spleen.¡±


    Togi stared Veronica right in the face before asking ¡°Did I stutter? The bird needs to go mach three, or it¡¯s not going to survive Blackwood¡¯s threat environment. Make it bigger if it needs to be that way, but the bird needs to go faster.¡±


    Rat groaned as she contradicted Togi with ¡°We did our research, the fastest flying organisms in the region we¡¯re deploying to are all slower than our laser falcon. Plus we can¡¯t make the bird any bigger, we¡¯re already pushing the upper bounds of the mass limit imposed by our registered tournament category.¡±


    Togi raised an eyebrow before asking ¡°Alright, what if you just ran the existing engine at higher output?¡±


    Immediately, Veronica replied ¡°Then it would be at risk of explosive failure, Togi. Look, maybe you can just stick to your field of expertise and let us handle the rest?¡±


    A few hours later, the three of them were readying their next prototype when Veronica reached for her tablet, only to find that the spot where she normally set it was missing. Somewhat confused, she asked ¡°Did anyone move my tablet? Even according to my digital memory this is where I left it, so it should still be there.¡±


    Togi shrugged in response, asking ¡°Could there have been a memory glitch of some sort? Those things have been known to happen. Just look around and see where it turns up.¡±


    Veronica nodded, checking the other side of her workstation and quickly finding the tablet there. As she picked it up she muttered to herself ¡°But that¡¯s not¡­ where I put it?¡±


    This sort of event continued on for several Megaseconds, items disappearing from where Veronica and Rat thought they were, Togi denying everything, and Veronica and Rat both starting to doubt their own judgments more and more.


    There were still two Megaseconds to the tournament when they decided enough was enough, and went to get their morphs inspected for memory issues. That said, the appointment they scheduled wound up only a few kiloseconds before organism deployment due to scheduling concerns. And so the two comforted themselves with the thought that soon they¡¯d have answers to what was going on.


    Rat and Veronica arrived at the doctor¡¯s office about a kilosecond ahead of schedule, sitting in the nondescript waiting room of the clinic. The two were nervously holding each other¡¯s hands as they sat in the moderately uncomfortable chairs for several minutes before the announcer called for them.


    When the pair arrived, they were greeted by a person favoring a tall and slender synthmorph ¡°Hello, I am Doctor Erren. What¡¯s your issue?¡±


    Somewhat nervously, Veronica answered ¡°I think my memory might be going, and I want it inspected. Rat¡¯s in the same situation.¡±


    The doctor nodded in recognition before saying ¡°Would you rather be in your morphs while I inspect them, or would you rather Mindcast out? I have some temporary mini-morphs on hand that you two can wear in the meantime if that would be more comfortable.¡±


    Veronica answered ¡°I¡¯d like to be in a different brain right now please.¡± and Rat nodded in agreement.


    The doctor nodded, before handing each of them a small currently inactive robot, noting ¡°That¡¯s a mini-morph with an integrated Mindcast scanner in its head. Please press it to a major data line in your current morph and switch bodies.¡±


    Veronica complied immediately, pushing the head of the robot up against the black box implant she had in place of her sternum. A brief moment later she was in the mini-morph, hopping off her old body as Rat followed suit.


    Looking up at the doctor, Veronica asked ¡°Now what?¡±


    Doctor Erren calmly lifted Rat and Veronica up to the counter before saying ¡°Now, it¡¯s time for the inspection.¡± as he opened a drawer full of highly specialized tools, a few of which were moderately invasive.


    Several excruciatingly long kiloseconds of examinations passed as the doctor checked over the hardware and wetware running his patient¡¯s normal morphs for any possible errors. After much searching, he reluctantly concluded ¡°Well, at least on a physical level there¡¯s nothing wrong with your morphs that would be causing the memory issues you¡¯ve expressed concerns over. Both your neural and digital memory systems are in perfect working order.¡±


    There were several moments of silence before Rat voiced another concern ¡°Well, if the problem wasn¡¯t with our bodies, maybe the problem is with us? Can that be a thing that happens?¡±


    The doctor hummed for a moment, before saying ¡°It¡¯s rare, but it can happen. If you want I can look over the cognitive processes making each of you up and figure out what¡¯s going on there.¡± before turning to retrieve an item from the cabinet.


    Veronica nodded in agreement ¡°Yes, please do that¡­ what are you getting?¡±


    That¡¯s when the doctor revealed two small clipboards containing legal-looking stationery, saying ¡°These are consent forms. By law any non-emergency medical procedure that involves invasive analysis or alteration of a conscious mind must have written consent provided beforehand, or else the doctor in question can face criminal penalties. Please sign here.¡±


    Veronica and Rat both signed their consent forms without hesitation, Rat even going so far as to say ¡°Please, we just want some answers.¡± as she passed her form back to the doctor, where some drones quickly carried it off to be scanned and copied.


    The doctor nodded seriously as he said ¡°I¡¯ll see what I can do on that front.¡± and put both of the medical mini-morphs into stasis mode as he started digging into the closest things his patients had to what could be called a soul. He fully decompiled the machine code that they were composed of into something human readable, and with his thinking speed cranked up to the maximum as he dug through the data for any signs of a possible issue.


    After a few kiloseconds, he recompiled his patients in their state at the start of stasis mode and booted them. As they snapped into awareness, Veronica asked ¡°What did you find? Do you know why we¡¯ve been forgetting things constantly lately?¡±


    Doctor Erren sighed, before saying ¡°Well, on that front I¡¯ve got some good news, and some bad news. The good news is that you two don¡¯t have any inherent errors in your consciousness that would lead to memory issues.¡±


    Rat hesitated slightly, before asking ¡°What¡¯s the bad news, then?¡±


    The doctor growled in frustration as he stated ¡°You¡¯ve been getting gaslit.¡±

 Real-World Testing

    The next day after our expedition to Blackwood, Queen asked over breakfast ¡°Alright, so of the organisms we encountered in the Thundersnow Steppes, which are the most likely to cause problems for our submissions?¡±


    I immediately replied ¡°Probably one of the herbivore species, specifically the laser goats. I have a sneaking suspicion that they¡¯d eat the boomnut bushes given half a chance, they¡¯ve got such robust digestive and immune systems that finding a way to poison or infect them is a whole lot easier said than done, and they¡¯re aggressive enough to simply fry our squirrels if they come within line of sight.¡±


    Wesseck thought for a moment, before asking ¡°Queen, do you think you can make our nanoweapon effective at protecting the boomnut bushes from being eaten by laser goats?¡±


    Queen idly tapped one of her claws on the table in thought as she tried to figure out what to say, before she replied ¡°Probably. With the vast and varied number of different immune systems it¡¯s going to need to contend with my nanoweapon probably can¡¯t infect literally everything, so we¡¯ll have to prioritize somewhat. That said, one thing I can definitely do is double-check the nuts¡¯ anti theft mechanism to ensure they¡¯ll explode if an unauthorized organism eats them; they¡¯re chock full of PETN, and all that pent up chemical energy should still be there ready for a sudden violent release should the nuts be swallowed.¡±


    I chuckled at the mental image of a laser goat chewing on a boomnut before suddenly exploding, agreeing ¡°Yeah, that should go a long way to discourage most organisms from eating boomnuts. Eaty go bang? Perfect deterrent for anything eating the nuts aside from our squirrel.¡±


    That¡¯s when Wesseck jumped in and noted ¡°Queen, I can handle that part no problem. What I can¡¯t do is make sure our symbiotic microbe can get around every single immune system it might have to contend with. Only you can really do that.¡±


    Queen awkwardly rubbed behind her head as she said ¡°Right, I forgot about that for a moment. Thanks for the reminder, Wesseck.¡±


    Our robotic spider companion replied ¡°No problem, Queen. Yures, how are you going to goatproof the squirrels?¡±


    I grinned as I replied ¡°Indirect fire. Funny thing about lasers is that they can¡¯t arc over obstructions, but the quills our squirrel fires won¡¯t have that problem. Couple that with the rather devastating payload they¡¯ll be packing thanks to a diet rich in boomnuts, and our squirrels should be quite capable of driving the laser goats out of their territory.¡±


    Queen and Wesseck thought for a moment as they mulled this over. Then Wesseck raised an important point ¡°If the squirrels are supposed to be artillery capable of firing beyond visual range, they need some way to actually get information about targets. This means we either need to enable the bushes and other squirrels to act as spotters, or we need to put guidance packages of some sort in the quills.¡±


    I thought for a moment, before saying ¡°I could probably do both easily enough. Run a biological radio antenna down the spine to allow for comms that way, and stick a really tiny set of ganglia, sensory organs, and control feathers in the quills. They¡¯ve already got some integrated nervous structures for the detonator, so making them target-seeking seems fairly doable.¡±


    What followed was a significantly long period of us all working on our organisms to get them up to scratch. Still, after a Megasecond or so, Queen noted ¡°I think we¡¯re ready to do some real-world testing of our organisms. I¡¯ve gotten us some time at a testing range outside city limits, where we can see how our squirrel, microbe, and boomnut bushes actually perform outside of simulation.¡±


    I gazed at my porridge for a few moments as I thought it over, asking ¡°Will we be allowed to test the explosive components there? We¡¯re banking a lot of our strategy on being able to blow stuff up, and if the testing site won¡¯t let us do that we¡¯re not going to get good data.¡±


    Queen grinned as she said ¡°Its the same place where Doctor Brose took me to test out my flame breath. They have absolutely no problem with being used to test high energy weaponry, and they¡¯re big enough for the kabooms not to break anything important.¡±


    Wesseck vibrated with excitement as they said ¡°Awesome! I¡¯ll print off a bush and a bucket full of boomnuts right away! I wanna get there and blow stuff up as soon as possible!¡±


    For my part, I smiled as I agreed ¡°Sounds great, I¡¯ll get a six pack of artillery squirrels printed off right after breakfast, then we can go.¡±


    Sure enough it only took a few kiloseconds for us to get our prototypes ready for testing. We loaded everything up onto a transport pallet, I quickly swapped to my feminine body, and with our adorable creations of SCIENCE in tow we made our way to the train station.


    En route I took the opportunity to look up the place we were going. Darwin¡¯s Proving Ground was an organism testing facility with a long history of providing a safely isolated place for bio-engineers to test their organisms¡¯ more destructive adaptations without much fear of things getting out of hand.


    As such, when we arrived at the testing range, I was excited to see how our squirrels and bushes would perform. Wesseck was eagerly bouncing up and down with anticipation as we made our way through the corridors and to our assigned testing dome. Queen followed behind us, her presence and constant measured stride anchoring us with a deep sense of confidence.


    As soon as we reached our testing dome, we immediately got to putting our organisms through their paces. I opened the doors on the pet carriers the artillery squirrels were currently sleeping in and booted their test brainware. Meanwhile Wesseck opened the container of boomnuts and started scattering them around the area, and Queen put out a dish of microbial slurry for the benefit of both the boomnut bush and the squirrels.


    I idly mused ¡°So, what do we want to evaluate first? There¡¯s a whole lot of complex behavioral adaptations for the squirrels that need to be tested, and the boomnut bushes are also pretty tricky.¡±


    Wesseck noted immediately ¡°We need to make sure that the squirrels can eat the boomnuts without exploding. If they can¡¯t do that, they don¡¯t have access to their primary food source, nor their only source of dietary explosives.¡±


    I blinked ¡°Good point.¡± before immediately getting out my tablet to send a movement command to one of the artillery squirrels, ordering it to retrieve one of the boomnuts and eat it at a substantial distance away from our current location. Wouldn¡¯t do to get blown up if something went wrong after all.


    And so the artillery squirrel scampered off to the far end of the testing range. It grabbed a boomnut off the ground, bit into it, and with a voracious appetite tore into the highly explosive morsel. We waited with apprehension as the boomnut digested, Queen poring over the biotelemetry we were getting from the squirrel¡¯s digestive system.


    After several moments, our draconic teammate announced ¡°The detonators have been digested, and the squirrel has started PETN uptake. It¡¯s confirmed; our squirrels can eat the boomnuts without exploding.¡±


    I sighed with relief, noting ¡°Other behaviors pertaining the boomnuts include stashing them for later consumption, and their use as command-detonated mines. I¡¯ll put them through their paces for that while you two make sure the bush is working properly?¡±


    Both Queen and Wesseck were on board with the idea, so I got to work. The first squirrel behavior that needed testing was resource caching. So I quickly sent the command to the squirrels to set about burying a number of the boomnuts around the testing area.


    The artillery squirrels quickly scurried into action, grabbing the nuts off the ground, digging small holes, and burying them. A few minutes of action passed before all the assigned boomnuts were firmly embedded in the ground, and I moved on to the next part of the evaluation.


    I quickly tapped some commands into place on my tablet, and the artillery squirrels¡¯ memories fuzzed as if it had been a few months since they¡¯d stashed the nuts. I then sent a command to excavate their stashed nuts.


    As I watched the squirrels search and dig, Wesseck noted ¡°Well, it looks like nut burial and retrieval is working just fine. Going to be testing the use of boomnuts as landmines and such next?¡±


    I nodded as I replied ¡°Yeah. If the squirrels can use boomnuts for demolitions and traps, it massively increases the number of threats they can dispose of. It¡¯ll also let us add a bit of meat to their diet beyond what was already going to be in there.¡±


    Wesseck rubbed his mechanical pedipalps together as they noted ¡°That sounds great. I¡¯ll leave you to it, Yures.¡±


    The testing for the first couple remote detonations went smoothly, but the third time there was very abruptly a total lack of kaboom. I immediately called out ¡°Hold on everyone, we¡¯ve got an unexploded nut. I¡¯m going to send a drone in to try and diagnose the fault.¡±


    The drone in question proceeded to hover in to take a closer view under my skillful direction. Still, just as the tools were about to come into contact Wesseck noted ¡°Yures, can I take a look at that?¡±


    I obligingly handed the tablet to Wesseck as they poked and prodded at various parts of the nut via remote control. After a few moments they noted ¡°Found what went wrong. See, the wiring for this bit here-¡± Wesseck tapped the screen, the drone poked part of the nut with a tool, and then was immediately blown apart as the boomnut went off.


    Wesseck lamely finished ¡°-didn¡¯t grow correctly, leaving a gap in the frequencies it could receive.¡±This narrative has been purloined without the author''s approval. Report any appearances on Amazon.


    As bits of drone rained down around us, Queen remarked ¡°Look at it this way Wesseck, better to learn about this sort of thing in testing, when we¡¯ve got time to fix it before the main event.¡±


    Wesseck perked up again, saying ¡°Yeah you¡¯re right! Really glad I figured out how that issue happened. Anyway, I think you¡¯ll be testing the artillery soon?¡±


    I smiled as I said ¡°Yep! Boomnut bush ready to act as a spotter?¡±


    Wesseck bounced up and down excitedly as they called out ¡°Absolutely! I¡¯ve rigged up the photo-receptors, targeting computer, and radio really well and I¡¯m absolutely ready to see how well it works in practice!¡±


    I grinned as I replied ¡°Alright then. Turn it on, then let¡¯s send in the target drones.¡±


    What followed was drone after drone flying into the testing area and being targeted for elimination by a spread of high explosive quills arcing over the terrain, falling down atop the drones¡¯ positions to explode on impact. After the first couple drones got exploded, we decided to see how the guidance packages I¡¯d shoved into the quills would handle evasive maneuvers.


    The answer to that turned out to be fairly mediocre honestly. While the quills were guided and capable of major course corrections, they weren¡¯t equipped for the thrust they¡¯d need to really catch a jinking target. As such the drones were by and large able to avoid single quills fired at them. On the other hand, massive spreads of a few thousand quills fired all at once proved quite effective at downing drones; there just wasn¡¯t any room available for them to dodge.


    After several minutes of this and a few other tests, Queen noted ¡°Alright, we¡¯ve got the artillery spotting and coordination systems working quite well. Same goes for the command-detonation and all the other behaviors we wanted to take a look at. I think it¡¯s time for the immunological testing; I¡¯ve got several vials of genuine Blackwood pathogens here and I want to see if the immune systems I implemented can handle them.¡±


    My eyes widened as Queen tacitly admitted to bringing Blackwood-grade nanoweapons to the testing range, more specifically ones we didn¡¯t have a kill switch for. This was far beyond anything I had thought she would do to make sure our organisms were ready for the tourney, but in retrospect it made sense.


    As such, I acquiesced ¡°Yeah, I guess that makes sense. Still, if it¡¯s no offense I¡¯d rather not be in this dome when the vials get opened.¡±


    Wesseck nodded far too quickly even for them as they replied ¡°Yeah, I don¡¯t want to be anywhere near that when you open it up.¡±


    Queen rolled her eyes as she replied ¡°Well obviously. We¡¯re going to have it opened via drone, and we¡¯re already booked for the testing dome to be thermally sterilized once we¡¯re done with it.¡±


    Then Wesseck raised an important note, saying ¡°Then in that case the immune testing should happen last. There¡¯s still some important behaviors we need to test, such as nest-building and mating. Coming in here to do that after releasing those pathogens? No thank you, I¡¯ll pass.¡±


    I quickly queued up more orders for the squirrels, setting them to construct a nest around the boomnut bush, as they were supposed to. Quickly the artillery squirrels started digging into the dirt, piling up dirt into a ring of earthen defensive works even as they excavated accompanying foxholes and burrows. After a couple kiloseconds, I noted ¡°Nest construction seems to be working just fine. Going to see how they handle their mating behaviors.¡±


    Another kilosecond or so later, we¡¯d confirmed that the squirrels had all necessary behavioral routines in good working order. Sighing with resignation, I agreed ¡°Let¡¯s get clear. We don¡¯t want to be in here when the pathogens are released.¡±


    Wesseck and Queen both thoroughly agreed, and soon we were in a section of the proving ground that was totally environmentally isolated from the dome we had been operating in. The three of us looked solemnly at the prompt on the tablet that would unleash the pathogens Queen had copied from our expedition. Then we all tapped it together at once.


    Immediately the readouts of our squirrels and boomnuts registered infection with approximately fifty thousand different pathogens. Immune cells of every description surged into action, ripping them apart left and right, terminating infected cells, and disrupting all attempts to coordinate the offensive by the pathogens.


    For a few kiloseconds, it looked like we might have actually managed it on the first try and created an immune system capable of taking on anything that particular region of Blackwood could throw at it. Then slowly, inexorably, the immune systems began faltering. We were forced to watch helplessly as the organisms we¡¯d spent so much work on began being devoured from within by the myriad of deadly engineered microbes.


    When it was over, and all the squirrels and the boomnut bush were dead, Queen said ¡°That¡¯s why I wanted to do real world testing of the immune system. Now we know exactly what flaws in the setup were exploited by the horrors of Blackwood¡¯s microbial biosphere, and I can fix them so that when the actual tournament rolls around our organisms will actually be able to deal with the threat environment.¡±


    We all knew Queen was right and didn¡¯t contest it. After a few minutes of sitting in thought, the bulky robotic caretaker for the testing ground clomped over and noted ¡°If you¡¯re done here, it sounds like I¡¯d best run the incinerator cycle for that dome; I really don¡¯t want whatever you unleashed in there leaking out somehow and contaminating the rest of the proving ground.¡±


    Wesseck nodded, saying ¡°Yeah, that¡¯s probably for the best.¡±


    With that, we turned to leave and go back to Cthonic Mare. On our walk back to the train station our load was much lighter than it had been on the way in. All the organisms we¡¯d printed were dead and burned after the immunology testing, as were the testing drones and the pathogens Queen brought. All we were bringing back with us was our testing data, and that didn¡¯t weigh much. But the deaths of those squirrels somehow did.


    As the maglev train started moving again, Wesseck asked ¡°Where do we go from here? Obviously we fix all the issues we identified with our organisms and get all the features they already have nice and polished. But what else? There¡¯s significant time remaining before the actual deployment date, and I want to give our three way team of organisms as good of a chance as we possibly can.¡±


    I noted with annoyance yet another shift away from being comfortable in my current body, even as I replied ¡°I¡¯m honestly not quite sure. I suppose we could try and get some data on what our competitors are doing and build in some counters, but I really have no idea how to go about doing that without causing more trouble for our entry in the tourney than it¡¯s worth.¡±


    Queen thought for a moment, even as she replied ¡°We can ask Doctor Brose about it when the time comes. As it stands we¡¯ve got much bigger problems on our hands; we need to make sure our critters can handle what¡¯s already down there before we worry about countering other contestants from this year.¡±


    I shrugged my wings in thought as the train went zooming down its tunnel, honestly not really sure if there was anything else to add to the conversation.


    When we arrived back at our lab, we had just enough time to eat dinner before we really needed to get to bed. I hopped upstairs to change bodies to my masculine one first, then came back down to see an utterly delicious-looking haunch of roasted meat being served by the domestic drones.


    As I sat down, I thought to ask ¡°Hey, what type of meat is this anyway?¡±


    Queen grinned as she replied ¡°Brose¡¯s Wyvern flight muscle, freshly printed in convenient roasting joint form and grilled to perfection. We¡¯ve hit a major milestone today, and I figured that was worth celebrating with something a bit special to eat. So I used the collected biological data from those wyverns we dealt with on Blackwood to culture some of their meat for our consumption.¡±


    I smiled a bit at the thought of this, replying ¡°That sounds absolutely wonderful, Queen. I¡¯m really looking forwards to finding out how you had it seasoned.¡±


    Wesseck simply looked up from his ice cream for a moment, before replying ¡°That¡¯s my part in the cooking! Come on and have a go, it should taste great!¡±


    I obligingly sat down at the dinner table in front of the roasting joint, Queen taking that as an invitation to smoothly slice the roasting joint apart. As she did so, she noted ¡°Wesseck made a point of having the seasoning printed into the tissue, so it should be evenly flavored all the way through.¡±


    It was now that I realized I was drooling a bit, and I eagerly served a portion of roast wyvern to my plate.


    Digging in, I found out quite rapidly that Queen and Wesseck were both absolutely right about the quality of the meat and seasoning. It was tender but retained its structural integrity, while at the same time tasting slightly sweet with a hint of fire. As I ate, I made a point of taking a break to say ¡°You two did an awesome job on this! How¡¯d you find the time while we were working? I know growing a good cell line takes a while.¡±


    Queen chuckled and said ¡°Well, we actually started on it about half a Megasecond ago. We¡¯d have invited you to join in, but you were so preoccupied with making sure the squirrels would be ready for the event that you didn¡¯t notice when we tried to get your attention.¡±


    I thought back to the long period of hard intellectual labor I¡¯d been putting in, then blushed with embarrassment as I realized Queen was right. Quietly I admitted ¡°I guess I do have a tendency to get mono-focused on this sort of thing pretty bad. Thanks for pointing that out.¡±


    Wesseck chirped happily as they replied ¡°No worries, Yures! This way we got to pleasantly surprise you with a special treat, which we couldn¡¯t have really done if you¡¯d had attention to spare for anything except bio-engineering.¡±


    Queen simply smiled my way as she swallowed another piece of meat, then noted ¡°I made frozen yogurt for desert, by the way. Rum-berry flavor.¡±


    I grinned at that, saying ¡°Now I¡¯m even more excited! Queen, you make the best yogurt!¡±


    Queen grinned with self-assurance as she replied ¡°Indeed I do! It¡¯s something of a passion of mine.¡±


    That¡¯s when Wesseck chipped in ¡°Well in that case let¡¯s eat! I want to get to dessert before the kilosecond is up!¡±


    I could easily agree with that assessment, and so we ate. The meat continued tasting just as delicious as it had right from the start, as did the legume course it was served along with. Still, by the time we¡¯d had our fill of both we still had plenty of room for dessert. Queen took note of that and signaled to the lab¡¯s computer system that it was time for dessert. Sure enough, a drone quickly retrieved three tubs of Queen¡¯s best frozen yogurt from the freezer.


    I looked to my draconic friend for confirmation, and she simply nodded. I quickly started jimmying open the lid with my spoon, before I stuck it in and took a bite. Immediately I found myself transfixed by the flavors Queen had managed to cram into it. It was sweet and sour and savory all in one, everything backed by the distinctly pungent flavor of Ethanol. I absolutely loved it, cheerfully noting ¡°Queen, I wouldn¡¯t mind if you made this in bulk!¡± before returning to voraciously devouring it.


    Queen was busily digging into hers as well, but she managed to poke her nose up from it for just long enough to reply ¡°I think I will! Now that the drones know how the recipe we can have as much as we want!¡±


    Wesseck meanwhile was silent, though on closer inspection that seemed to be on account of collapsing in pleasure, a spoon vibrating in his mouth. I idly waved my hand in front of his face, asking ¡°Wesseck, are you doing alright in there?¡±


    Wesseck replied ¡°Yeah, I¡¯m doing fine, this stuff ish just sho gooood¡­ I want mooore.¡±


    Queen chuckled as she replied ¡°I hope that doesn¡¯t happen again, but I¡¯ll take that as a ringing endorsement as to the quality of my product.¡±


    I smiled at the byplay, noting ¡°I¡¯m not quite as overwhelmed by the quality of the frozen yogurt as Wesseck is, but yeah, this stuff is really really great.¡±


    Dinner started winding down after that, the drones clearing off the dishes and packing up the partial serving of roast wyvern that would probably end up as a snack for Queen later. There wasn¡¯t any frozen yogurt that needed cleaning up however; every last nibble of that got devoured with terrifying efficiency.


    And with that it was time to start getting ready for bed. I said my goodnights to Queen and Wesseck before wandering up the stairs. En route I idly noted it was time for another morph swap, so when I reached my room I shuffled through the morph closet before getting ready for bed.


    I tucked myself in for sleep, and without much fanfare I drifted off into my resting state. I dreamed of squirrels and explosions.

 Freedom of Information Quest

    The next day at breakfast, Wesseck, Queen and I were trying to figure out what we would do to get information on the competition. I started by suggesting ¡°We should probably start by looking up how many other teams are going to be competing in our region. Then we prioritize based on threat level.¡±


    Wesseck took a brief break from devouring more of Queen¡¯s rum-berry frozen yogurt to agree ¡°Yeah, that¡¯s probably the most sensible option for going about this. Wanna wait until after breakfast, or should we do it now?¡±


    I shrugged my wings as I tapped a couple things into my tablet ¡°Running a search now.¡±


    Immediately the search came back with about two thousand different results for other teams competing in the Thundersnow Steppes. I set it to be displayed by the volumetric projector above the table, then went back to focusing on my sausage and eggs. The sausage wasn¡¯t any sort of recreated Blackwood fauna, instead being made purely as a food product. So even though it was pretty tasty it didn¡¯t have much emotional significance to me. The same went for the scrambled eggs the sausage shared a plate with, doused in savory sauce.


    Queen and Wesseck pored over the search results as I ate. When I was done I inquired ¡°So, what have you two figured out?¡±


    Queen awkwardly raised her hand as she noted ¡°Four, actually. A few people who are between bodies moved in last night and are riding along in my brain for a couple days. They¡¯re spectating.¡±


    I shrugged, if Queen was hosting headmates and they weren¡¯t causing problems it wasn¡¯t much business of mine.


    Wesseck broke the silence, noting ¡°Anyway, we¡¯ve determined that the three most dangerous threats we¡¯ll need to worry about are plants, aerial predators, and microbes, with the microbes being the most prevalent and severe threat. We can proof against aerial predators pretty well without too much extra data since they¡¯re a pretty generic threat, but defense against microbes and plants is going to need a lot more specificity.¡±


    I thought for a moment, asking Queen ¡°So, just how much data on the microbial competitors would you need to make effective counters for it anyway?¡±


    Queen hummed, then answered ¡°Ideally I¡¯d want the full genome and epigenome data if I could get it, but I should be able to make a reasonably effective counter with something like a copy of their lab notes.¡±


    I thought for a moment before I asked ¡°Espionage is allowed, right?¡±


    Wesseck nodded vigorously, ¡°Checked while you were eating. Spying on the other teams is both allowed and encouraged. Sabotage is firmly banned, but just checking up on the competition to see what they¡¯re doing is absolutely fine.¡±


    Queen hummed for a moment, noting ¡°Honestly I¡¯m surprised we haven¡¯t been visited by any spies already; you¡¯d think that people would want to know what we¡¯re up to.¡±


    I noted ¡°About that? We¡¯re first time tournament entrants, and two of us are students besides. They probably don¡¯t think we¡¯re a serious contender so we¡¯re not getting much attention. Plus we haven¡¯t really talked to anyone about our plans or otherwise gone looking for publicity. Which is probably a good thing for us, to be completely honest.¡±


    Wesseck nodded and replied ¡°That makes a whole lot of sense, Yures. Queen, how do you think we should start?¡±


    Queen thought for a bit, then said ¡°Alright, let¡¯s start by seeing what we can get on the microbial and plant competitors over the network first. I want to have at least some idea for who to watch out for before we do any more in-depth spying, and that means starting with easily accessible data.¡±


    I nodded ¡°Yeah that¡¯s a really good idea Queen. I will note that we should be careful not to overlook the teams that haven¡¯t said much about what they¡¯re brewing up for the competition; just because the competition is largely ignoring us doesn¡¯t mean we should repeat their mistakes.¡±


    A few kiloseconds passed, and we¡¯d all wound up on the couch in the lab¡¯s living area as we paged through the possible threats.


    I read off the first one ¡°Mushroom Kingdom, looks like they¡¯re brewing up a fungus-based parasitic infection. It¡¯s a brainjacker.¡±


    Queen took a look at the data they¡¯d already put out, replying ¡°Put it in the no further information needed pile; they¡¯ve put out enough legit technical data on their entry that I can brew up a counter for it without needing more.¡±


    Wesseck took the next one off the pile of competitors to watch ¡°Cane Forest, they¡¯re making a tree that pumps corrosive gases into the air around it to drive off other lifeforms.¡±


    I rolled my eyes as I asked ¡°What kind of corrosive gas? There¡¯s acids, bases, reducers, all sorts of chemicals that could fit the bill. I can easily make the squirrel¡¯s skin, quills, and eyes heavily resistant to all of them, and I¡¯m pretty sure you can use the same tricks on the bushes.¡±


    Wesseck perkily replied ¡°Yep! Absolutely doable! Honestly I¡¯m almost disappointed in the people who came up with that.¡±


    Queen drew the next competitor card, reading off ¡°Petri Pals, immune-suppressing chronic infection that¡¯s purpose-built to species jump with extreme ease. Looks like they¡¯ve covered the bases for all the immune systems already down there, but I¡¯ve made sure that our squirrels¡¯ immune systems can handle anything they¡¯re likely to dish out.¡±


    I drew my second card as I replied ¡°Rootstalks. They¡¯re in the same category as us with a small animal, a plant, and a microbe. They¡¯ve gone for a species of tall grass though. I will admit I¡¯m not entirely clear how the three organisms are supposed to synergize, but they could be something to look out for. They¡¯ve not said much else beyond that, so we found another team that¡¯s trying to stay quiet.¡±


    Wesseck immediately started writing that down as they noted ¡°Got it, we¡¯ll have to look more deeply into what the Rootstalks are doing then.¡±


    The conversation continued in this regard for another eight kiloseconds as we went over every single other team registered to compete in the same region as us. By the end of it we¡¯d identified three more relevant teams we wanted to keep an eye on aside from the Rootstalks, so now it was just a matter of figuring out a good way of getting the information we needed.


    After coming up with all sorts of convoluted plans for secretly spraying smart dust around their lab, hacking their computer systems, and other similar ideas, it was Wesseck who suggested ¡°Why don¡¯t we just pose as journalists covering the tournament and ask them? It minimizes things that could go wrong, most of the teams will probably relish the publicity, if we get into their lab it¡¯s a perfect opportunity to deploy some discreet surveillance devices, and if it doesn¡¯t work we¡¯ve got other options.¡±


    I mulled over the idea for a moment, before admitting ¡°Yeah that¡¯s probably one of the simplest options. The question is what sorts of journalists do we want to pose as? There¡¯s a bunch of different skill levels we could pretend to be at, so it¡¯s an important question.¡±


    That¡¯s when Queen chimed in, noting ¡°We should say we¡¯re student journalists. That way actual mistakes are more likely to be overlooked. On top of that, our lack of connection to any actual news organizations won¡¯t immediately mark us as impostors. It¡¯ll still be relatively easy for someone to identify that we¡¯re not who we say we are, but they¡¯ll hopefully be less likely to do that.¡±


    Wesseck and I nodded, and commented ¡°Good plan. Queen, you want to brew up some spying nanomachines while I take care of costumes?¡±


    Queen smiled and said ¡°Conveniently, I already have some of those on file from earlier in my education that I could have cultured in a snap. That said, I¡¯ll want a little time to make some tune-ups, clean out a couple old glitches, and properly program them for the job.¡±


    Wesseck nodded affirmatively, saying ¡°Guess I¡¯ll be practicing how to be a reporter in the meantime.¡±


    Another few kiloseconds passed as we got all our equipment ready, with signal repeaters for the surveillance data, a few discreet nanomachine sprayer glands integrated into our morphs, reporter costumes, and a basic understanding of the relevant mannerisms.


    Now it was just a matter of setting up a meeting time with the Rootstalks. First I made sure to proxy our connection to make it look like we were operating out of somewhere on a completely different part of Bark, then I started the call.


    Thirty seconds passed before the connection was completed, the flat-panel holographic display lighting up with the face of an eight-eyed girl with a slightly confused expression. After a moment, she greeted me with ¡°Hello? Who are you and why are you calling?¡±


    I¡¯d recited this a few times already, so I simply said ¡°I¡¯m Yures Hann, and I¡¯m a student journalist. I¡¯ve decided to get some experience reporting with my friends over the summer, and visiting a participant in the invasive species tournament seemed like a good way to do it.¡±


    The girl blinked, before replying ¡°Why didn¡¯t you say so? We can work you into our schedule easily enough. I¡¯m Chitin by the way.¡±


    I just fired back ¡°I did say so. Anyway, twenty kiloseconds from now work?¡±


    Chitin thought for a moment, then replied ¡°Maybe forty one kiloseconds instead? We¡¯re expecting to be really busy in twenty kiloseconds. Organism testing, you know.¡±


    I shrugged and replied ¡°See you then. Oh, really quick, is this address correct?¡± as I sent a packet of text containing the location of her team¡¯s lab from off the network.


    Chitin took a look at it, then said ¡°Yeah, that¡¯s the correct address. See you soon!¡± and then the call ended.Unauthorized duplication: this narrative has been taken without consent. Report sightings.


    I sagged, the weight of what we were doing here finally getting to me. After a moment, Wesseck asked ¡°Yures, are you feeling alright?¡±


    I replied honestly ¡°Not really. We¡¯re massively betraying Chitin¡¯s trust here, and she¡¯s a decent person. Remind me to do something to make it up to her after the tournament, please?¡±


    Wesseck nodded sadly ¡°Got it. Anyway, we¡¯ve got our date set up and know what we need to do. Anything we should do in the meantime?¡±


    Queen replied ¡°I¡¯d rather work on our organisms some more until it¡¯s time to go. There¡¯s a bunch of teams for which we have all the information we need to counter them already, and getting so tied up in espionage that we forget to actually improve on our organism is a good way to lose.¡±


    I nodded in agreement, noting ¡°Yeah, considering how some of the aerial predators we¡¯ll be up against are going to be literally supersonic, it¡¯s clear that simple unpowered quills aren¡¯t going to cut it. So I¡¯m going to design some surface to air missile quills for the squirrels. Wesseck, could you maybe add some solid rocket fuel to the boomnuts please?¡±


    Wesseck cheerfully replied ¡°No problem Yures, I can do that easily enough. Probably going to go with nitrocellulose or Hexaaza for that job, since it means I can re-use most of the same metabolic pathways I came up with for making PETN.¡±


    I nodded appreciatively, and then we got to work.


    Aside from some additional bio-engineering and a break for food and rest, that¡¯s all we did before we had to get ready for our interview with the Rootstalks. Solemnly, we all got dressed in our student reporter costumes, got our equipment ready, and headed for the maglev train station.


    The train ride felt a lot longer than it actually was. Going by the clock it took us less than a kilosecond to go zooming around Bark to our destination, but I could have sworn it took a Megasecond going by how it felt. Still, eventually we arrived, and I wrenched myself into a happy appearance for the mission.


    As soon as Chitin opened the door, she asked ¡°Hello, are you the reporters who wanted to come see what we¡¯re working on?¡±


    I forced an enthusiastic smile as I replied ¡°Yep, absolutely. Mind showing us what you¡¯ve been working on in there?¡±


    Chitin eagerly stepped aside as she replied ¡°Sure, come right in!¡±


    We all entered, and Queen noted ¡°Anyway, according to your tournament registration you¡¯ve gone for a plant, microbe, animal trio?¡±


    The spider girl nodded as she noted ¡°Yeah, we¡¯ve been working our but off on the doomgrass for a while already, along with the soil fixers and the thrushes.¡±


    The urge to talk shop and remark about the squirrels I¡¯d been tinkering with welled up, but I crushed it down. Instead I said ¡°Hmmm. So, how exactly do they work together anyway? The soil fixers are fairly obvious, but where do the thrushes come in aside from aerial seed dispersal?¡±


    Chitin narrowed her eyes and asked ¡°...You¡¯re from a competing team, aren¡¯t you.¡±


    After a moment of trying to decide I hastily replied ¡°Nope, not at all, we¡¯re definitely reporters, no question about it at all.¡±


    There were a few moments of silence before Chitin sighed and said ¡°Interview called off. Out. Now.¡± and started gently shoving us towards the door, aided by a swarm of utility drones.


    Only a few moments later, we were out and I sighed ¡°Guess that¡¯s that for this information gathering trip.¡±


    Chitin¡¯s voice quickly erupted from a concealed speaker somewhere ¡°I heard that! Now scram!¡±


    We took the hint and left. Back on the train, Queen remarked ¡°Well, the good news is that I got our spy nanomachines deployed properly. Got a few minutes of telemetry off them too before Chitin sterilized her lab.¡±


    Wesseck perked up immediately at that, asking ¡°Ooh, what did you get?¡±


    Queen shrugged ¡°Nowhere near as much as I would have liked, but probably enough. I¡¯ve got the data on their general performance specifications for the doomgrass and thrushes, but not much on the biochemical side of their adaptations. So you two will probably be quite capable at designing counters for their macroscopic organisms, but I¡¯m pretty much stabbing around in the dark on the immunological side.¡±


    I slumped at that, saying ¡°Wish I could have kept cover for longer there. Sorry for getting us caught.¡±


    Wesseck patted me on the back, saying ¡°Don¡¯t worry about it, we can probably make it up to Chitin after the tournament is over, and we got what we came for in terms of information. So there¡¯s no need to feel bad.¡±


    Shortly afterwards we were back at the lab planning our next moves. Whether we should go for more information hunts was a point of major contention.


    I was against it totally, noting ¡°I¡¯m sorry but I¡¯m just not cut out for espionage work, I don¡¯t think I can go through with that again, and we need to focus on improving our own organisms.¡±


    Queen nodded in thought, before she said ¡°You have a good point there. Want to get on with the squirrel improvements while me and Wesseck get on with finding more intelligence on the other competitors.¡±


    Wesseck noted ¡°Well, in that case I¡¯m going to be working with Yures, because we need to update the boomnut bushes as well. I think it might be possible to engineer coexistence with the Rootstalks¡¯ doomgrass, and I for one think that would be superior to mutual extermination.¡±


    Queen thought for a bit, ¡°In that case you two can go ahead with the updates to deal with the Rootstalks; I can¡¯t do much on the immunological front for them, but I can definitely go get more information on the other teams, and I¡¯m probably more psychologically suited to doing that anyway.¡±


    Wesseck and I both nodded our approval, and as soon as breakfast was done we all got to work. Queen got herself an interview with another team using the same excuse as we used to access Chitin¡¯s lab, meanwhile we got down to business.


    The absolute first thing I noted was ¡°If we want peaceful coexistence with the Rootstalks to be possible we¡¯ll need to adjust the behaviors of the squirrels and bushes to be a bit less ridiculously hard-line. Still, we also can¡¯t leave a totally unchallenged exception in their threat detection routines, or else they¡¯ll get totally smashed by whatever organism learns to exploit that vulnerability first.¡±


    Wesseck rubbed one of his pedipalps under his mouth for a moment, noting ¡°That¡¯ll be easy enough for the squirrels and not too difficult for the bushes. I¡¯m almost tempted to go for a simple tit-for-tat algorithm, but that has far too many exploitable flaws to really work out long term.¡±


    Soon enough we lost ourselves in our work adjusting the behavior programming for our organisms. Kiloseconds passed as we worked, and then we were suddenly interrupted by the return of Queen Shed, our draconic teammate announcing ¡°I can report complete and total success on all remaining information retrieval operations!¡±


    I immediately perked up, asking ¡°What did you get?¡±


    Queen simply smiled as she replied ¡°I¡¯ll tell you over dinner. It¡¯s gotten quite late, and we do need to keep our brains in good working order after all.¡±


    I smiled as I replied ¡°Fair enough, I¡¯ll get the drones to work whipping something up and Wesseck will tell you what we¡¯ve been up to while you were away.¡±


    I quickly shouted a command to the kitchen systems to do a soup, and turned my attention back to the conversation as Wesseck related our decision to pursue a coexistence strategy with the Rootstalks if possible.


    I could clearly see Queen mulling the idea over, then she pronounced ¡°That sounds just fine to me. I¡¯ll definitely need to change the behaviors of our bacterium as well to accommodate that strategy, but I think it should work out just fine without much issues.¡±


    I simply shrugged and replied ¡°Figured as much. Anyway, I¡¯m going to go get dinner going. Any particular requests?¡±


    To my mild surprise it was Wesseck who answered ¡°I want stir-fried cereals! Not too picky on the mix-ins, but I want it spicy.¡±


    Queen chuckled ¡°Yes, that does sound like something I¡¯d be interested in. Thanks for getting the drones started on cooking, Yures.¡±


    And so I made my order for dinner over the lab¡¯s network. About a kilosecond of preparation time passed while we waited, the industrious robots busily working away on our meal in the background before announcing its completion.


    We strode into the kitchen, coming face to face with a platter covered in steamed brown grain, root and stalk vegetables chopped up fine and mixed into it along with thin slivers of meat, all of which had a drizzling of a sparkling brownish-red sauce over them.


    I eagerly sat down and started serving myself, Wesseck and Queen both rapidly following suit in getting ready to eat. Then we were all ready, and after I finished my first mouthful I asked the dragon in our midst ¡°So, mind telling us about those other teams you took a look at?¡±


    Queen thought for a moment, before noting ¡°The first team I¡¯d consider an actual serious threat is working on a plant they call the Howitzer Tree. Apparently they want to go for the absolute maximum in direct seed dispersal while also causing massive havoc for any unfortunate organisms in the way of said seed, since it can fire a seed pod loaded with fireproof seed for two hundred kilometers that then explodes like a fragmentation and incendiary warhead. Apparently they want to burn away any other plant life in the area that could possibly compete with the saplings when they start growing.¡±


    I took another bite of delicious fried grains as I thought on what we could do about the situation. After a moment I noted ¡°Well, the squirrels are already designed to infiltrate competitors¡¯ nests and blow them up with boomnuts, so I see no reason why I can¡¯t expand that behavior to blowing up problematic plants and installations as well.¡±


    Queen nodded sagely, replying ¡°Good move, though I¡¯ve also made updates to the microbe allowing it to kill off the trees¡¯ roots with very good effectiveness, meaning it can¡¯t take root somewhere that boomnut bushes have recently grown.¡±


    Wesseck looked up from his food for a moment, seemed to be considering whether to say something for a moment, then just shrugged and went back to eating. I followed suit as I gestured for Queen to continue, since the meal really was just that good.


    Queen of course spent the time rattling off a bunch of different organisms that she¡¯d gotten all the spicy details on so we could figure out what to do about them. Some we figured out a way to destroy, others we added to the possible coexistence list, and a few more we determined would actually be effectively dealt with by the adaptations we¡¯d already fitted our organisms with.


    Still, eventually we reached the end of both the meal and the list of competitor¡¯s organisms. At the end of both we allowed the drones to carry away the dishes to be cleaned, and I noted ¡°Well, I for one am ready for bed. What about the rest of you?¡±


    Wesseck shrugged and replied ¡°Yeah, I guess some rest would be nice. Queen, how about you?¡±


    Queen simply replied with a yawn ¡°Think I¡¯m ready to go to sleep. It¡¯s been a long day of chatting up our competitors to get the data on them, and I for one think it¡¯s high time we get ready for the next day. We have every last scrap of information we could possibly hope for, and I say it¡¯s high time we get around to using it.¡±


    And so we got up from the table and started making our way towards our respective beds, climbing the stairs to the sleeping area of our lab in the process. As we climbed we chatted a bit to figure out what upgrades we¡¯d prioritize for the squirrel, and what things we could leave as low priority to get around to if we had time before the tournament started.


    Queen and Wesseck went off to clean what parts of their bodies needed maintenance before sleep, but as for me I simply mindcast into my gender-neutral morph before getting ready to snooze. My morph closet was perfectly capable of keeping them in pristine condition when I wasn¡¯t using them, so I saw no reason not to make use of that capability.


    Morph swap complete, I made my way to the bed, lifted up the covers, and slid in underneath them, taking the time to enjoy the smooth feeling of the cloth against my skin.


    Unfortunately that¡¯s about as far as the pleasant times got, since I found myself thinking back to my encounter with Chitin earlier in the day. I tossed and I turned and I desperately tried to get to sleep, but the thoughts of how I¡¯d betrayed her trust just wouldn¡¯t leave.


    After six kiloseconds of staring at the ceiling, I finally gave up and reached for my phone. After a few moments of staring at the device, I made the call.


    Unsurprisingly, it immediately went to voicemail. Spending a moment to think, I said to the recorder ¡°Chitin, it¡¯s Yures calling. I¡¯m sorry about pretending to be a student journalist earlier today. I understand if you never want to talk to you again, but I¡­ Ugh, can¡¯t even come up with a good apology I¡¯m so tired. Anyway if there¡¯s something I could do to make it up to you, please call me back and tell me. I really am sorry about lying to you. Goodbye, I guess.¡±


    And with that I finished recording the email, set the phone on my nightstand, and finally, fitfully drifted off to sleep.

 Fitting of the Survivalist

    Now that we had all the information on our competitors that we were reasonably going to be able to get, our next major hurdle was going to be actually implementing all the upgrades, adaptations, and features our organisms were going to need in order to handle what they¡¯d be going up against. Probably the most complicated and difficult to make work properly would be the coexistence routines, so that¡¯s what we were going to work on first.


    Wesseck had of course trotted out the iterated prisoner¡¯s dilemma for modeling the situation, and both Queen and I had agreed that it was probably one of the better ways to handle the whole situation.


    That said, one of the first things I noted was ¡°We can¡¯t just use straight tit-for-tat, it¡¯s too forgiving. But a grudger algorithm is also stupid.¡±


    Wesseck idly rubbed one of their pedipalps under their mandibles as they thought, ¡°You¡¯re right, Yures. We¡¯ve got to program our organisms with an algorithm for this that actually understands nuance. Personally I think some variant of the reputation score system would probably work the best; that way our organism trio could keep track of which organisms have a track record of unrelenting hostility and which ones are more cooperative and respond intelligently.¡±


    I finished the bite of porridge I¡¯d been chewing, then commented ¡°Going to need a few different parts to make that work. We¡¯re going to need inter-organism comms which we¡¯ve already got handled. We¡¯re going to need a directory of various organisms with reliable means of identification to make sure they don¡¯t get mixed up, and we¡¯re going to need a range of responses that our squirrels and bushes can deploy to smartly respond to threats.¡±


    Queen mused on the notion for a bit as she ate the last bite of her egg wrap ¡°Bare minimum we want coexist, remove from territory, kill on trespass, and exterminate at all costs as responses. That¡¯s a decent range of options that should cover almost anything we need to worry about, though we need to figure out the thresholds for what triggers each response, and how quickly we want the squirrels, bushes, and microbes to calm down after a while.¡±


    I opined ¡°Speaking quite bluntly, stepping down from exterminate should only happen after at least twenty Megaseconds of no contact. Much sooner and we¡¯d be at risk of the artillery squirrels getting wiped out by an organism that they simply couldn¡¯t coexist with due to being too soft on them, but keeping a permanent program of genocide going would be a waste of resources when there¡¯s no need for it.¡±


    Wesseck nodded as they tossed their empty tub of ice cream into the waste bin ¡°Yeah I can see that working out pretty well. Stepping down from kill on trespass and remove from territory meanwhile should require significant periods of contact without malfeasance; that way an organism only gets put on the nice list with genuine evidence of being cooperative.¡±


    Queen nodded at that, replying ¡°Seems fairly reasonable. Anyway, I think that plants should start in the coexist category and animals should start in the remove from territory category. That seems like it would result in the least unnecessary resource expenditure without letting our organisms get rolled over.¡±


    As the drone took away my empty bowl, I shrugged and commented ¡°Seems pretty reasonable to me. Still, now we¡¯ve got to actually implement it.¡±


    Wesseck of course took the opportunity to spring to all eight of their mechanical feet and dramatically proclaim ¡°To the organism deployment simulator!¡±


    And so we all made our way from the kitchen area to the laboratory, more specifically the server rack. I immediately booted up the computing cluster and we got down to the business of programming in the coexistence behaviors.


    I spun up a virtual copy of the Thundersnow Steppes with organisms based on the data we¡¯d collected earlier, and then we ran simulation after simulation of our trio of artillery squirrel, boomnut bush, and symbiotic pathogen. We quickly found that surviving would require being very quick to escalate from coexistence to removal from territory or killing on trespass, but that escalating to extermination was only really warranted in the case of prolonged unrelenting hostility that no level of territory enforcement would really fix.


    We got so sucked into the behavior simulations that when Wesseck noted ¡°Huh, looks like sixteen kiloseconds have passed. We should maybe think about breaking for lunch.¡± I was legitimately shocked to realize they were correct when I looked at the clock.


    I awkwardly wrapped my wings around me as I suddenly felt an urge to go swap bodies right then and there. Meanwhile Queen shrugged and remarked ¡°I¡¯ll leave the evolutionary sim running for a while as we eat.¡±


    I quickly started making my way to the stairs, even as I replied ¡°I¡¯ll be down in a bit. Just need to swap out of my enby morph real quick.¡±


    I quickly reached my room and the morph closet within, selecting the masculine morph from the three I had and performing a quick mindcast.


    Gender identity issues temporarily resolved, I quickly glided back down the stairs to the kitchen, arriving to see that the lab drones had apparently been brewing up a spicy bean and meat stew while we were working on the coexistence algorithm.


    I sat down at the table and asked Queen ¡°So, is the stew any good?¡±


    Queen shrugged her wings and answered ¡°Don¡¯t know; haven¡¯t tried it yet since we were waiting for you.¡±


    I nodded and plunked myself down at the table, the drones quickly serving me a portion of stew. I took a bite, and hummed in pleasure as the flavors exploded through my mouth.


    Wesseck meanwhile had gone for another of Queen¡¯s custom yogurt blends instead, apparently not much liking spicy food. Between bites, they noted ¡°So, what should we do next anyway? Personally I think we should deal with the low-hanging fruit in regards to adaptations first. Stuff like proofing against the corrosive vapors and shooting down Howitzer Tree shots.¡±


    I mulled the idea over for a little while as I chewed up the beans in my current mouthful of stew. After a bit I swallowed, the said ¡°Sounds like a decent enough plan to me. Get that sort of easy but impactful thing out of the way first, so we¡¯ve got time to focus on the remaining big issues before the tournament date.¡±


    Queen then raised the important point, noting ¡°We actually don¡¯t have all that much time remaining before we¡¯ll have to freeze the design and send our organisms down to Blackwood¡¯s surface. We¡¯re probably going to have to prioritize what issues we deal with there, since there¡¯s a solid chance of not getting to everything before we run out of time.¡±


    Wesseck and I both nodded, and I noted ¡°Guess we¡¯ll get to dealing with the corrosive gas issue right after lunch then. It¡¯s a relatively easy solve and we don¡¯t want to have that become a problem during the actual tournament later.¡±


    Wesseck shrugged, replying ¡°I¡¯ll go get the boomnut bush proofed against it if you¡¯ll proof the squirrels, Yures?¡±


    I shrugged and answered ¡°Sure. Queen, what are you going to be up to while we work on that?¡±


    Our draconic teammate hummed and replied ¡°Going to make sure the immune systems can deal with that parasitic fungus the Mushroom Kingdom cooked up. It would be really embarrassing if after all the effort I put into our critters¡¯ immune systems they got taken out by that sort of group.¡±


    I cheerfully replied ¡°Well then, guess we all know what we¡¯ll be working on for this afternoon. Let¡¯s get to it.¡±


    Despite my earlier bravado, making a corrosion-proof coating for the outsides of our artillery squirrels was going to be immensely difficult. Not only were acids and bases corrosive for entirely different reasons, but there were several other classes of compound that could easily cause massive problems.


    There were a few different options for coatings that could protect against them, such as the infamously nonreactive platinum group metals; but that had the problem of making our squirrels far too shiny and not being suitable for eyes. Another option would have been fluorocarbons, which were so unreactive that they could be used to store chlorine trifluoride, but the Thundersnow Steppes didn¡¯t have enough bioavailable fluorine for that to work. Ultimately what I went for was aromatic stabilization and some amphoteric molecules, trusting in the six membered carbon ring¡¯s notable stability to buffer against corrosion for long enough to get out of the area while the acidity buffer would keep pH from getting too out of whack.


    Wasn¡¯t corrosion-proof sadly, but it was a heck of a lot better than not having any defense against corrosive substances at all. I quickly saved my work, and went to go check on how Wesseck was doing.


    As it turns out, my robotic spider teammate was at wit¡¯s end trying to get a hundred percent corrosion proof boomnut bush, since obviously the plant wouldn¡¯t have the option to get up and move.A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation.


    After a bit, I asked Wesseck ¡°So, I managed to make the squirrels pretty corrosion resistant. What if we just put that dissolving vapor tree on the kill on trespass list and have the squirrels blow it up?¡±


    Wesseck sagged, replying ¡°Yeah, that¡¯s probably the best option there. I¡¯ll get the comms open for that no problem.¡±


    And so the rest of the afternoon passed as Wesseck and I coded a behavioral solution for the problem of corrosive fumes poisoning the boomnut bushes, making sure to properly integrate it with our earlier adjustments to the coexistence routine.


    At dinner, Queen had a big happy grin on her face as she replied ¡°Good news, I managed to proof the immune systems against every last pathogen on the list of competitors already, and I even started to have time for upgrading our microbe to infect them back.¡±


    As the drones flew out with a steaming hot pot of veggie noodles with sausage bits in, I commented ¡°Glad it went so well for you. Corrosion proofing our organisms proved to be surprisingly difficult, but I think we probably kind of managed it in the end. Still, it took all afternoon.¡±


    Queen nodded solemnly, ¡°Figured. Chemical hazards are a major problem to try and tackle in an afternoon, but I¡¯m glad you managed it. Anyway, we¡¯ve only got a couple more days to work on stuff, so let¡¯s eat up and get cracking.¡±


    That¡¯s when I put my metaphorical foot down, replying ¡°No. We are not going to be putting in crunch for the tournament. That is just going to result in degraded quality, sloppy work, and misery for us. No crunch.¡±


    Wesseck nodded, ¡°I¡¯m with Yures on this one, Queen. I know you want every single possible thing to be perfect for the tournament, but that¡¯s just not going to be possible, and even if it were putting in massive amounts of crunch time isn¡¯t the way to do it.¡±


    Reluctantly, Queen relented ¡°Alright. I guess you both have a point there. Still, let¡¯s eat up and get some rest so we¡¯re ready for tomorrow, I guess?¡±


    And so we all partook in dinner, enjoying the meal greatly before packing up and getting towards bed. I did the regular routine of swapping to my enby morph and letting the morph closet maintain the one I just left, and then I flopped into bed.


    That¡¯s when my phone rang. I quickly checked the caller ID, and noting that it was from Chitin I accepted the call. I was about to speak, but the spider girl from earlier cut me off with ¡°Honestly we¡¯re not even mad. Spying on other teams is just part of the game and we did it to you first so fair¡¯s fair. Absolutely going along with the coexistence strategy by the way.¡±


    I just stared at the phone in shock as I processed that, before asking ¡°What. How!?¡±


    Chitin chuckled on the other end of the line as she noted ¡°We snuck smart dust into the food shipments for all the competitor¡¯s labs right at the start. Honestly surprised you didn¡¯t notice that way back when, but what¡¯s done is done. Anyway, you got time to talk now, or not really?¡±


    I hummed ¡°Actually I¡¯m just getting ready for bed at the moment. I¡¯ll probably end the call soon enough, but I¡¯ve got a question that¡¯s been bugging me a little.¡±


    Chitin¡¯s voice changed tone slightly as she asked me ¡°Oh, what?¡±


    ¡°Are you a system by any chance? It¡¯s just I don¡¯t think I¡¯ve ever heard you using singular pronouns.¡±


    Chitin¡¯s answer was a simple ¡°Yeah, talk to you about it later. Bye.¡± and then they ended the call.


    On my part I simply set the phone down on the side table and turned over, draping my left wing over me as I started slowly drifting off to sleep.


    After another couple days of work on various adaptations I realized I¡¯d actually fallen asleep on my right wing and cut off the circulation to it, the limb being completely numb as I levered myself upright. I quickly determined that I felt like wearing my female morph right now, shuffled myself through the morph closet to the clothing closet, and quickly got myself dressed for the day.


    I came downstairs to find Queen busily at work directing cleaning drones to check the lab for smart dust, and I found myself asking ¡°Cleaning up that smart dust Chitin mentioned?¡±


    Queen simply nodded as she replied ¡°Yes, I am. Not too upset about the smart dust everywhere, but now that we know it¡¯s present we¡¯d be foolish not to get rid of it. So, I¡¯m having the lab cleaned.¡±


    On Wesseck¡¯s part, they were busily working away at yet another tub of ice cream, apparently eager to get back to work on the boomnut bushes. Still, they took a moment between bites to note ¡°Still, nice to know Chitin¡¯s planning on going along with our coexistence strategy. Makes that whole part of the effort feel a bit less risky, and it¡¯ll be nice to have an ally team.¡±


    I nodded as I got a plate full of stir-fried noodles delivered to my spot at the table, replying with an absentminded ¡°yeah¡±.


    Queen looked at me for a moment, before asking ¡°Something wrong, Yures?¡±


    I shrugged my wings as I poked at my food a bit, ¡°Honestly I¡¯m not even sure. We¡¯ve done so much to get our organisms ready and I¡¯m honestly not sure if there¡¯s more of any actual use we can do in the two hundred kiloseconds we have left leading up to organism deployment.¡±


    Queen nodded understandingly, replying ¡°I¡¯ll be honest I¡¯m feeling a lot the same. I¡¯ve come about as close to crafting a perfect microbe and immune system as I¡¯d ever thought possible, and within my specialty there just isn¡¯t much else to do.¡±


    Wesseck thought for a moment about what else needed doing, before they replied ¡°There¡¯s still a tiny bit of fiddling left to do with the boomnut bush that I want to get done, but I should have that done before lunchtime. Why don¡¯t you all take a break, and I¡¯ll join you when I get my part done?¡±


    I shrugged, replying ¡°Sounds like a decent enough plan. Queen, anything you¡¯d want to do with the extra time?¡±


    Queen thought for a moment, eventually coming to the conclusion ¡°Want to see my source?¡±


    I blinked, and asked ¡°You¡¯re a fictive?¡±


    Queen grinned as she replied ¡°Yep, final boss too. Want to see?¡±


    I thought for a moment and answered ¡°I can¡¯t see a reason not to. What game are you from anyway?¡±


    Queen simply sent a command to the entertainment system to download a game, and a few moments later we were looking at Dragon Adventure Three.


    I quirked an eyebrow at Queen given the immensely generic title, and simply asked ¡°Queen, is this game any good?¡±


    Queen laughed and fired back ¡°No way, but the old adage about finding diehard fans for anything certainly held true here. I ditched the guy in question, but I absolutely wouldn¡¯t exist if it weren¡¯t for his obsession triggering his brain¡¯s ¡®make a person¡¯ routine.¡±


    I shrugged and replied ¡°Huh, makes some amount of sense I guess. Anyway, if you want to play that¡¯s fine, but I think that I¡¯ll just watch, thank you very much.¡±


    And so I flopped onto the couch as Queen started up the game, went through character creation, and then immediately started speedrunning the whole thing. She exploited numerous glitches to skip boring levels, shredded whatever combat encounters she deigned to actually involve herself in, blew through what puzzles were there with contemptuous ease, and soon enough had reached the final level.


    Having sat through all of that, I asked ¡°So, why did you bother getting that good at such a generic and boring game?¡±


    Queen grinned as she blitzed through the level ¡°So I could have an easier time showing people the only actually good part of the game. Behold, me!¡±


    I was tempted to fire back with a witty remark along the lines of ¡°Egotistical much?¡± only to find myself knocked silent by how actually legitimately breathtaking the arena was, the virtual version of Queen stomping forwards off her throne and immediately tearing into Queen¡¯s avatar.


    Or, she would have if the Queen I was on the couch next to weren¡¯t an absolute master of the game¡¯s mechanics, utterly demolishing her counterpart. Still, even then the game was making her work at it, and I found myself asking ¡°Any idea why they made the you fight so much better than the rest of the game?¡±


    Queen shrugged as she scored another couple hits on the version of her in-game. After a few moments she replied ¡°I honestly don¡¯t know. Maybe it was deadlines, maybe there was a change of creative direction part way through, could have been anything. Still doesn¡¯t make up for the rest of the game though.¡±


    I mused on that for a moment, then said ¡°Yeah, I guess that makes sense. I¡¯m going to go check on Wesseck while you finish up.¡± as I watched Queen completely dominate the boss fight without much difficulty.


    Queen fired back a quick approval gesture, and I made my way off to the lab in search of the robotic spider on our team. I quickly found him tinkering away with the bush in question, apparently trying to squeeze another tiny bit of efficiency out of the metabolic pathways.


    After watching for a few minutes, it occurred to me to ask ¡°Wesseck, are you actually making any meaningful improvements to the design at this point, or is this just busy-work to feel like you¡¯re doing something of use?¡±


    Wesseck briefly put down the tablet and thought for a bit, before replying ¡°Honestly it¡¯s probably busy-work. Just let me get this tidied up to a final version and I¡¯ll come join you and Queen on break time.¡±


    I said ¡°Okay Wesseck. See you in a bit, then.¡± and went back to the lounge area where Queen was currently dealing the finishing blow to her video game counterpart. I sat myself down and watched for a moment without feeling much need to talk.


    Of course, Wesseck finished up fairly soon after that and made their way to the lounge area. As they arrived, they said ¡°Well, I think that¡¯s everything we could plausibly do to make our organisms more viable for the tournament. Any ideas for things we could do with the rest of today and tomorrow while we wait for tournament launch date?¡±


    I remarked ¡°I¡¯d normally say testing, but with the time remaining we probably wouldn¡¯t be able to fix any flaws we spotted before we¡¯d have to deploy the organisms anyway, so what¡¯s the point?¡±


    Queen thought for a bit, and simply answered ¡°Personally, I want to go out to some really nice restaurant. One with some actual artistic flair to the food they serve.¡±


    I smiled at the thought, but made a point of noting ¡°That¡¯s only for mealtimes though. Any other ideas for the rest of the time?¡±


    That¡¯s when Wesseck suggested ¡°How about we visit the Immigrant Cultures Museum tomorrow?¡±


    I mentally tried out the idea. It didn¡¯t have anything to do with bio-engineering which would be a nice change of pace, it had a truly vast array of art in styles from all over the settled galaxy, there were interesting facts to learn about the many and varied cultures that had moved here over the Gigaseconds, and all in all it had a lot going for it.


    So I answered ¡°Yeah, that actually sounds pretty great for something to do tomorrow. Not so sure about the rest of today, though.¡±


    Queen hummed and asked ¡°Do we actually need to do anything? We¡¯ve been doing loads of stuff for the past several Megaseconds now, and I think it¡¯s about time for us to take a proper break and rest for a while.¡±


    I leaned into Queen¡¯s massively muscular chest as I thought about it, eventually replying ¡°You know what, I think I really like that idea. Let¡¯s just take the rest of today off to kick back and relax.¡±


    Wesseck of course objected to this idea, saying ¡°Aww, but I was hoping to go do something exciting today.¡±


    I chuckled ¡°Wesseck, not everyone has your boundless font of energy. It¡¯s okay to just sit back, relax, and take a break.¡±


    Wesseck held abnormally still for a moment, then eventually replied ¡°Okay. Let¡¯s watch some streams then while we wait for dinner time.¡±


    And so the rest of the afternoon passed with us arrayed on the couch, watching the seconds tick by as we simply sat and rested after a long, long period of very hard work.


    After a while it was of course time for dinner, and we made our way to the kitchen. It was roasted sausage with legumes tonight. Pretty tasty, but I¡¯d definitely had better.

 Strategic Organism Deployment

    Eventually, the organism deployment date came around, and it was busy. All competitors were required to submit their organism specs to one of the approved bio-printing locations for the tournament, and from there they would be sent to the launch rings for deployment.


    In our case, we¡¯d opted to watch at the printing site in question, both because we wanted to be present in person for this, but also because it wasn¡¯t totally unknown for the printers to have some difficulty dealing with the weird custom cell lines that contestants dreamed up for use in their critters, and we wanted to make sure that didn¡¯t happen in our case.


    So we got out of bed early in the morning, ate breakfast, got dressed up in our best business-casual wear (which was a suit of power armor in Queen¡¯s case) and made our way to Hammer and Bennet Bio-Products, which was our assigned production facility. We¡¯d have to take one of the long distance trains for this if we didn¡¯t want to mindcast, but that wasn¡¯t too much of a hassle, and it would ultimately take somewhat less time than printing out a new body on site.


    So a kilosecond or so after we left the lab, we arrived at the bio factory in question. We were greeted at the door by a man wearing a four-armed synthmorph who introduced himself with ¡°Hello, I¡¯m Corrite Gores for Hammer and Bennet Bio-Products. I take it you¡¯re a team competing in the Blackwood Invasive Species Tournament?¡±


    Queen nodded ¡°Yes, we¡¯re the Snow Coast Symbiotes, submitting the artillery squirrel, boomnut bush, and a micro-organism that we honestly forgot to come up with a name for.¡±


    Corrite hummed ¡°Yes, we got your message earlier. Anyway, if you¡¯ll follow me you¡¯ll get to see the section of our facilities that we set aside for your use.¡± and swiftly hovered away on the magnetic track installed in the floor of the building.


    We followed after him through the corridors with Wesseck taking the lead, passing several manufacturing bays until we arrived at bay 20F. Corrite opened the door to let us in, and I couldn¡¯t help but be impressed by what I saw.


    There were twelve gigantic cell-culturing vats along the back wall of the manufacturing bay, each with readouts indicating that it was full of feedstock and rapidly replicating cells. These vats were connected to a dizzying array of pipework that lead to a set of outright bio-printing assembly lines making both mature artillery squirrel and boomnut bush specimens, but also un-germinated boomnuts, all of them being neatly packed in specimen re-entry capsules as soon as they came off the lines.


    Seeing all this, I found myself quietly uttering ¡°wow.¡± as I saw what was going on down there. Looking to the left and right, I noticed that Queen and Wesseck were equally impressed.


    Still, after a bit it occurred to me to ask ¡°Corrite, would it be a problem if we wanted to inspect one of the specimens? Just to make sure that the manufacturing process is going smoothly.¡±


    Corrite nodded and replied ¡°Sure. Just let me get the drones to fetch one.¡± before sending a command to the factory systems. A pair of the drones that had been involved in moving packed specimen capsules to the loading dock were diverted, and soon enough an artillery squirrel, a mature boomnut bush, and a boomnut had all been brought up to the catwalk we were standing on.


    Queen quickly took a sample from all the organisms present and ran it through her pocket analyzer. After a bit she noted ¡°Well, looks like the cell lines came out within acceptable tolerances. There¡¯s a bit more in the way of heavy metals and phosphates than I designed them to have, but I¡¯m guessing that¡¯s just due to standardized feedstock rather than any particular issues with the growth process.¡±


    Corrite nodded, remarking ¡°Yes, your cell lines were remarkably easy to work with compared to a lot of the ones we get. Sometimes they¡¯re a downright nightmare to culture in sufficient quantity without risking a dangerous nanosecurity breach.¡±


    Wesseck and I winced, and Wesseck said ¡°Eesh, I feel kind of sorry for you having to deal with that. Having to clean up after a nanoweapon breaches containment is no fun for anyone involved.¡±


    Corrite nodded solemnly ¡°That¡¯s true, but it¡¯s also just part of the business to be totally honest. You lot figure out some perfect nanological horror, and we have to figure out how to manufacture it in bulk without getting closed down for safety code violations.¡±


    Offhand I couldn¡¯t help but notice Queen preening, and I asked ¡°Curiously, have you done this sort of work before, Queen?¡±


    Queen replied ¡°Yeah I was in microbe manufacturing for a little while and know my way around the industry. One of the things I sent these people was tips for scaling up the cell production so they wouldn¡¯t have to figure it all out themselves.¡±


    Corrite chuckled and replied ¡°And I¡¯m glad you did. You saved us probably a hundred kiloseconds of trial and error getting this production run going, it¡¯s been a pleasure to work with you.¡±


    I idly nodded as I looked out over the factory floor and asked ¡°So curiously, how much longer is finalizing production going to take?¡±


    Corrite checked, replying ¡°You should meet tournament standards for deployment in about three kiloseconds. Not much else to do at the moment aside from relax and let the robots do it.¡±


    I nodded as I thought for a bit, saying ¡°I think I¡¯d like to watch. This is honestly really cool to see in motion, and I want to keep seeing it.¡±


    Wesseck chuckled ¡°If you like watching factories at work that¡¯s definitely an option. A lot of industrial sites offer tours.¡±


    I mulled the idea over and replied ¡°Yeah, that could be neat. I¡¯ll definitely have to try it sometime after the tournament.¡± and settled in to wait.


    Sure enough, a few kiloseconds later all of our organisms¡¯ starting population had been printed and packed, and it was time for them to be shipped to the launch rings. We followed the trucks to the loading station using an automated taxi, and watched as the capsules were loaded onto the launch rails.


    Wesseck quickly pulled up a trajectory tracker app on their tablet and noted ¡°We¡¯ll have a much better view of things if we watch from this perspective. We won¡¯t see too much from the ground.¡±


    I looked up at the orbital ring overhead and commented ¡°You sure about that? I can see a lot of the ring from here.¡± though the tone in my voice made it pretty clear I wasn¡¯t serious.


    Queen rolled her eyes as Wesseck chuckled a bit and said ¡°Yeah, I¡¯m sure.¡±, pulling out a volumetric projector to show what was going on in three dimensions.


    Immediately a full color representation of Bark and Blackwood blinked into existence, thousands of glowing pips representing specimen capsules already arcing through space towards the planet we were in orbit of. Wesseck fiddled with the projection settings a little, and then the pips representing our team¡¯s capsules lit up blue.


    I watched with rapt attention as our submission streaked through space along their trajectory, the seconds ticking by as they gradually grew closer to the ground.


    Still, after a bit they quickly lost their luster and I remarked ¡°I¡¯m hungry, let¡¯s go get lunch. Maybe we can meet up with Chitin?¡±


    Queen mulled the idea over for a bit and replied ¡°Yeah, that sounds like a decent enough idea. You want to call them, or should I?¡±


    Wesseck answered ¡°I¡¯d like to do it, please.¡± and immediately took out their phone to contact our mutual acquaintance. After a few moments to dial and wait for Chitin to pick up, Wesseck started talking.


    Queen and I didn¡¯t pay too much attention to the conversation, instead perusing various restaurants in the general area as we passed the time. Thus turned out to be a decent enough idea, especially since Wesseck chimed in ¡°Good news, Chitin¡¯s letting us pick the restaurant, though she says it¡¯s got to be in Cthonic Mare.¡±


    I grinned as I replied ¡°Well then, I know just the place.¡±


    Sure enough, a few kiloseconds later we were all sitting across a table from three Chitins in a restaurant with a penchant for the spicy and a very artistic chef. As I set down, I asked ¡°Curiously, is it a headmate per body, or did you duplicate your entire system?¡±


    The Chitin on the left answered ¡°The former. We¡¯re all branches off the same original that decided we didn¡¯t want to re-merge, but also didn¡¯t all need our own bodies a hundred percent of the time.¡±


    Queen shrugged and replied ¡°Fair enough. I¡¯m usually the only person running on my hardware, but sometimes I host people who are between bodies for a bit.¡±


    Center Chitin nodded approvingly ¡°That¡¯s quite kind of you, Queen.¡±


    Then the food arrived. My plate was piled high with ground meat, beans, chips and other vegetables, and I dug in with great enthusiasm. The fire in my mouth roared to an amazing height while the taste of transition metals tempered it nicely, and I found myself shoveling spoonful after spoonful in.


    A mere kilosecond later, I was done. My plate bare, I sat back to enjoy the afterburn. My friends finished their own meals soon enough after me, and Wesseck wondered aloud ¡°I wonder how things are going on Blackwood?¡±


    Left Chitin shrugged as she answered ¡°Our organism capsules should be landing about nowish. They probably haven¡¯t gotten settled in yet.¡±


    I nodded solemnly as I noted ¡°Really hope that our organisms do well, we need to get at least a bronze egg to avoid retaking some classes with a really horrible professor.¡±


    All three Chitins winced simultaneously, right Chitin noting ¡°Eesh that¡¯s rough. Er, mind if I inquire about what exactly happened there?¡±Support the creativity of authors by visiting Royal Road for this novel and more.


    I shrugged my wings ¡°Eh, this hardass named Thonne took out his personal issues on our grades. If he¡¯d outright failed us it wouldn¡¯t have been an issue, but he put us in the narrow range between passing and counting as a valid prerequisite. So if we don¡¯t want to get stuck taking those classes over again we¡¯ve got to at least get a bronze egg in the tournament.¡±


    Wesseck confirmed that, noting ¡°Yeah, microfauna lab for Yures, botany for me. That played a big reason in why we registered in the category we did.¡±


    Left Chitin nodded in thought, ¡°Honestly that sounds like the opening to a work of fiction, but what can you do? In our case we just thought competing in the tournament would be fun, so here we are.¡±


    Queen chuckled as she replied ¡°A perfectly respectable reason for joining the Blackwood Invasive Species Tournament. Personally I¡¯m in the same boat as you, Chitin. I graduated a while back and I¡¯ve been working on microbes for a hundred Megaseconds or so before starting a doctoral program; I figured that the tournament would both be a nice change of pace and would also help me grow my skillset a bit.¡±


    Center Chitin smiled back, and took a sip of the home-brewed soft drink that this place served along with the meal. After a bit of time savoring it, she noted ¡°I personally propose a toast.¡±


    I raised my cup above the table and asked ¡°To Blackwood?¡±


    The Chitins shared a glance and replied ¡°Sure. To Blackwood.¡±


    A moment later, we all raised our glasses and clinked them together over the table, cheering ¡°TO BLACKWOOD!¡± at full volume.


    Meanwhile on Blackwood the capsules containing yet another wave of biological horrors were raining down from the sky amid streaks of flame from the heating of atmospheric entry, slowing to terminal velocity a few kilometers over the ground before they deployed first a drogue parachute, then the main chute. After a couple minutes they began touching down and bursting open to release their contents onto Blackwood¡¯s surface. The Invasive Species Tournament was on.


    The absolute first thing on the to do list for the artillery squirrels was to locate the nearest boomnut bushes to their landing sites. While they had a full load of quills each, those quills couldn¡¯t be replenished without a supply of boomnuts to eat for propellant and explosives; in addition, the squirrels were the primary defense system for their symbiotic partner. Fortunately the bushes in question were sending out an encrypted homing signals to guide the squirrels in.


    Still, it would take quite a long distance for some of these squirrels to reach their bushes and start digging in. In the particular case of Squirrel F422, she¡¯d actually come down a good ten kilometers from the nearest boomnut bush, and would have her work cut out for her to reach the relative safety of the bushes in the utter chaos currently taking place.


    Case in point, the instant her pod opened, she found herself face-to-face with a Brose¡¯s Wyvern, already in the process of opening its mouth to blast her with an electron beam. Fear signals raced through F422¡¯s brain as she immediately took aim with well over a hundred quills and fired a wide spread in self-defense. The Wyvern made a credible effort to try and dodge out of the way, evading the worst of the barrage, but it couldn¡¯t avoid everything.


    Four direct High Explosive hits to the inside of the mouth were matched by two mind control hits to the torso. The wyvern immediately aborted its attack as the inside of its mouth was subjected to a rather significant detonation that damaged the director magnets for the particle beam, even as one of the injector quills found a gap in the armor scales and delivered its payload into the Wyvern¡¯s bloodstream.


    On her part, F422 was running for her life with a furious injured wyvern right after her. She quickly dodged to the right to avoid a swipe that would have definitely squished her quills or no, the Wyvern¡¯s claws slamming into the ground right on her former position.


    Meanwhile within the Wyvern the nanoweapon was busily at work ripping into the immune system. It was already well through disabling the adaptive functions that could have allowed it to be overcome later, and had started working away at the blood-brain barrier.


    Still there would be several more minutes at the least before the wyvern was noticeably sick, and in that time F422 would need to continue fleeing. She was rapidly looking around the terrain for somewhere, anywhere to hide where she wouldn¡¯t have to deal with a murderous wyvern after her. After some looking around she managed to find a burrow, an inviting dark hole in the ground far too small for the Wyvern to enter but just large enough for the artillery squirrel in question.


    Knowing full well that whatever lurked there had the potential to be even worse than the wyvern after her, F422 took the plunge into the tunnel. The wyvern slammed into the entrance just behind her, and F422 settled in to wait for it to finally succumb.


    Still, F422 was no fool despite her lack of higher cognitive functions, and turned her attention to deeper in the burrow, lighting one of her flamethrower quills on low intensity to provide illumination for the minute or so it would take to burn out. There didn¡¯t seem to be much else at risk of happening, so F422 jettisoned the candle quill from her back to let it burn out on its own.


    Outside nearly a kilosecond passed as Queen¡¯s incredibly nasty nanoweapon finally seized control of the Wyvern¡¯s central nervous system. Immediately its attack ceased as it started on a path to the nearest bush for decomposition as fertilizer, F422 taking the opportunity to exit the burrow and climb aboard.


    Compared to earlier, riding a wyvern was a lot less of a risk than being chased by one, especially with the benefit of aerial transport. However F422 still had to stay vigilant, constantly looking this way and that for incoming aerial threats. Sure enough an aerial threat was soon provided in the form of a flock of the newly introduced laser falcons coming in for an attack run on the oddly behaving wyvern.


    F422 immediately fired half of her surface to air missile complement, the rocket propelled quills streaking across the airspace between herself and the incoming airborne predators. However in that time the predators in question were able to react fully to the incoming threat, lasering the left wing clean off and sending F422¡¯s ride careening towards the ground with three kilometers still to go before reaching the relative safety of the boomnut bushes and with them other squirrels.


    As she fell towards the ground, F422¡¯s mind raced as to how to survive it, calculating aerodynamics and forces on a subconscious level. A conclusion reached, she clambered onto the falling Wyvern''s right wing and fired ten High Explosive quills into the shoulder, blasting the limb clean off and holding onto it like a parachute as the rest of the wyvern fell away beneath her to impact the ground with a sickening cross between a thud and a splat.


    F422 peered off into the distance for any remaining sign of the laser falcons, but by the looks of things they¡¯d all either been downed by the missile fire or decided that they didn¡¯t terribly want to deal with a missile-armed squirrel shooting at them and left the area.


    A few moments later, F422 hit the ground far more gently than the wyvern had and resumed her trudge towards relative safety, the three kilometers of distance still a major concern. Constantly scanning the ground and air for threats with her quills at the ready, F422 proceeded cautiously onwards.


    This caution was well-warranted, as it immediately helped her spot a holographically camouflaged snake lying in wait to ambush passing organisms. Having precisely none of that nonsense, F422 simply fired a mind control quill into the snake in question from cover of stealth, coming back a few minutes later to follow the snake as it now proceeded towards the same boomnut bush as her.


    A few more minor obstacles were noted over the next kilometer, ranging from toxic and armed plants of various descriptions to a pack hunting organism that quickly determined F422 wasn¡¯t worth the effort after each receiving a High Explosive quill for their troubles. But the next truly major obstacle for F422 was a hive of highly aggressive pollinators designed by Professor Thonne himself.


    F422 of course spotted the nest long before she was at risk of running into it. The snake of course was mindlessly charging right towards it, which F422 immediately recognized as presenting the possibility for the bugs in the hive to come after her afterwards.


    Immediately as a preventative measure, F422 fired a hundred of her incendiary and high explosive quills into the hive. Thousands of bugs died in an instant and plenty more were crippled, but F422 knew that the crippled survivors were already sending out alarms that would call the entire swarm to her location.


    Therefore F422 immediately started running for her life at absolute top speed. She abandoned the snake to its fate in the process; it might distract the bugs for a bit, and there was no way it would ever get away from the hive fast enough. So F422 went on without it.


    Behind her she heard a loud and ominous buzzing. Chancing a look behind her, F422 saw that a significant number of the bugs were chasing after her and gaining rapidly. Acting out of sheer terror, the squirrel immediately pivoted her quills to the rear, continuing to run at top speed as she waited for the bugs to get closer. Soon they¡¯d come within a few meters, and F422 immediately responded by firing off two hundred of her flamethrower quills to the aft, scorching all but a few bugs out of the air in a massive blast of flame.


    As she continued to flee, F422 jettisoned the spent quills to lighten her load, noting the buzzing trailing off behind her as she put more distance between her and the bugs.


    There were a few moments where it almost looked like one or two bugs would catch F422, but she managed to avoid that particular fate. Then she noticed yet another Brose¡¯s Wyvern coming in for an attack run, this time a juvenile. An arc of high-energy electrons blasted out of the wyvern¡¯s mouth that F422 barely managed to dodge, and immediately the squirrel whirled around to fire every last surface to air missile she had after it in the course of about a second.


    Dashing onwards as the rocket propelled quills streaked after the wyvern, F422 entered the final kilometer, her munitions significantly depleted and her anti-air capabilities gone. Off in the distance the juvenile wyvern had just barely started turning around as the missiles began slamming into it and exploding. Screaming in pain as it fell to the ground with shredded wings and severe wounds all over its body, F422 put the wyvern out of her mind.


    Then finally F422 came close enough to the boomnut bush to actually see it. From even this distance she could clearly see other artillery squirrels already starting to dig in around it to make the initial fortifications. Still, there were five hundred meters to go and there was still a massive patch of bramble in the way.


    Quickly F422 managed to identify a route around and started her detour, prepared to accept the added four hundred meters of distance this would require if it would get her to that boomnut bush sooner.


    However on the way she encountered a herd of laser goats blocking her path, which would surely vaporize her with their lasers if she tried to pass. Squirrel F422 knew she didn¡¯t have the munitions to reliably eliminate the entire herd, but she also knew that she was close enough to friendly artillery squirrels that she wouldn¡¯t need to.


    So squirrel F422 radioed for an artillery strike on the herd of laser goats in her way, immediately receiving an affirmative message that over a thousand high explosive quills were inbound.


    F422 quickly scampered away out of the minimum safe distance, and four seconds later the quills started hitting home. A thunderous roar of explosions rang out as the quills rained down, and a moment or so later it was done, the entire herd of laser goats having been killed or crippled by the indirect fire.


    F422 of course took the opportunity to continue on past the site of carnage towards the base, rounding the corner of the bramble only to be faced with a long eight-legged gunfox taking aim at her. F422 managed to avoid death by rolling to the side at the same time as she fired off twenty high explosive quills in the gunfox¡¯s direction, but that was a very, very close call.


    That latest threat dispatched, F422 resumed her march towards the safety of her fellow squirrels who were already doing a good job of cleaning out the nesting site for usage as a base of operations. Still, she was utterly exhausted, stressed out, and despite her programming not to she let her guard down at the sight of presumed safety.


    That¡¯s why she never spotted the cloaking shocker, the shape-shifting ambush predator leaping from its disguise as an innocuous clump of dirt and stabbing her with two electrified prongs as it closed in. The circuits were closed and well over four hundred volts of potential were established across F422¡¯s body. This electrical activity wreaked utter neurological havoc across the squirrel¡¯s systems, and among other things it touched off the payloads of F422¡¯s quills. All of them.


    Squirrel F422 and the shocker that had been killing her both promptly exploded in a blast of shockwave, shrapnel and flames that completely obliterated both organisms. In the distance the other artillery squirrels looked on at the death of their fellow with a rough approximation of sadness for a moment before returning to work. The bush had to survive, and the death of one squirrel could not be allowed to jeopardize that goal.

 Ecological Niche Acquisition

    From the nest rapidly developing around Boomnut Bush 909, Squirrel M115 could clearly see several major landmarks. Another bush with squirrels busily working away at the fortifications around it was clearly visible, and according to the radio chatter between the squirrels in M115¡¯s nest and that other nest the stretch of land between it would be perfect for large scale boomnut bush growth.


    And so M115 found itself with the somewhat unwanted task of planting boomnuts between the two nests. They quickly stuffed one into each cheek pouch, and then ventured forth into the no-squirrel¡¯s land between the nests with their quills at the ready to be fired into any hostiles.


    They didn¡¯t get very far from the nest before it was time to plant the first nut, quickly digging a hole in the dirt and dropping a boomnut inside. A quick signal to the nut in question set it into growth mode, and then burying it with dirt.


    Squirrel M115 then continued onwards to the next spot, still well within support range of the nest when he reached the second nut burial point. Another quickly dug hole, the second nut dropped in and subject to the same treatment as the first, and Squirrel M115 returned to the nest.


    When they arrived, they quickly noted that boomnut stocks were tight enough at the moment that further planting operations would need to wait. So M115 queried the nest for other tasks, with the result that current duties in need of completion were predator elimination and auxiliary food source acquisition, both of which would require venturing outside the nest.


    And so M115 sallied forth in search of threats to the nest. The newly deployed doomgrass was already starting to grow, but the fruit weren¡¯t mature enough to eat yet and M115 knew from his database that the Doomgrass would respond violently to attempts to eat the actual plant. Still, there were some pre-existing plant species around that M115 knew exactly how to work with. A few minutes of walking quickly took M115 to the massive blood berry bramble that F422 had tried to go around, but for M115 it was currently a resource rather than a hindrance.


    So the squirrel carefully plucked berry after berry from the bramble, stashing them in his cheek pouches to bring back to base. He had to shoot down a couple laser falcons with his surface to air missiles on the way back home, but that was a fairly minor annoyance all things considered. Still, soon enough he¡¯d made it back home and unloaded the berries in his cheek pouches for his fellow squirrels to eat.


    M115 had barely started back out of the nest for another berry run when the alarm went out throughout the squirrel nest that there was a flight of Brose¡¯s Wyverns inbound and definitely interested in what was going on here.


    Immediately M115 whirled around to spot the inbound wyverns, four of them approaching at high speed. The squirrels quickly conferred about a course of action, and it was agreed on to hold fire until the wyverns got closer. Of course, the wyverns did just that, and when M115 spotted one of them opening its mouth to fire the electron beam it was equipped with, M115 immediately shot back with a full third of the surface to air missiles he had in inventory.


    Between him and his fellow squirrels the sky was quickly filled with rocket propelled quills, all of them streaking right towards their targets and maneuvering to prevent evasion. Explosion after explosion rang out as the missiles struck home, and the wyverns dropped from the sky in fairly short order with varying degrees of injury.


    The injured wyverns quickly got back to their feet and started retreating. In response M115 was immediately ordered to follow after the Brose¡¯s Wyverns and stop them from getting back to their nesting grounds by any means necessary. If they told the rest of the wyverns what they found the entire clan would surely come by and wipe the entire squirrel nest off the map.


    So M115 and twelve other male squirrels were dispatched off after the wyverns, chasing after them at top speed. Slowly they closed the distance, the wyverns walking with relative sluggishness given their injuries. Dodging around bushes and rocks the squirrels quickly lined up their shots, and together they all volleyed a barrage of mind control quills into the wyverns in question.


    A few minutes of following later the wyverns all fell to the ground for a few moments as the nanoweapon payload seized control of their central nervous system, getting back up shortly thereafter and making their way back towards the squirrel nest.


    M115 quickly radioed back to inform the other squirrels and the bush of four mind controlled Brose¡¯s Wyverns en route for composting, all of them in various states of injury and ready to be used as fertilizer as soon as they could be buried.


    The nest sent back a transmission indicating approval, and requested nine squirrels to come back ahead of the Wyverns while the rest guarded the caravan to make sure it got back safely. M115 of course took the opportunity to get back early, dispatching a cloaking shocker that was in the way as he traveled.


    As soon as he got back, M115 asked for his next assignment, and was quickly informed that it was time to get the next generation of artillery squirrels gestating. Quickly squirrels F001, F980, and F336 presented themselves to him for mating, and he quickly grabbed a boomnut to eat before making his way down into the burrows for a well-deserved break.


    Meanwhile back on Bark, I was actually heading up my team¡¯s presentation on our organism¡¯s adaptations and general survival strategy. Queen and Wesseck were present of course, but I¡¯d done the most work on the squirrels so I was the one doing most of the talking about the squirrels. Similarly it had been decided that Queen would handle most microbe-related questions, and Wesseck would handle any curiosities about the boomnut bushes.


    Of course, the very first question I was asked was ¡°What inspired you to make a squirrel as your organism of choice?¡±


    In response I answered to the very polite mob of reporters and camera drones ¡°Academic requirements really. Basically this hardass professor named Thonne took out his personal issues on my grade for microfauna lab, and since I didn¡¯t want to repeat that class I joined the tournament to get the prerequisite for my next class from another source. Also squirrels are a nice versatile platform.¡±


    One of the many reporters (I wasn¡¯t really keeping track of them at this point) remarked ¡°Well, you¡¯ve certainly proven the versatility part what with all the different munitions you fitted those squirrels with. How about the behavioral configuration? From what I¡¯m aware squirrels tend to be pretty solitary.¡±


    I simply replied ¡°Put quite bluntly a solitary animal in that weight class won¡¯t be able to hold territory on Blackwood, plain and simple. Since the artillery squirrels need to hold territory to protect their food sources that means they need a robust social structure, end of story.¡±


    Yet another reporter took the opportunity to ask ¡°And the food sources in question, what¡¯s so special about those bushes that the squirrels need them to survive?¡±


    Wesseck took the stage at that point, my robotic arachnid teammate noting ¡°The thing is that those munition quills the squirrels use require a couple highly reactive compounds that many of the food sources on Blackwood don¡¯t provide. The high explosive quills require dietary PETN, while the anti-air missile quills and incendiaries require solid rocket fuel. In addition all of them need a propellant charge for launching from their follicles. The boomnut bush serves to provide all these explosives and combustibles in one easy to eat package, which the squirrels can use to great effect for keeping stocked up on munitions.¡±


    Things continued in this vein for several kiloseconds as we fielded question after question from the crowd, all of them eager to know what exactly we¡¯d created and sent down to the planet below. I was quite pleased by how enthusiastic the reporters were to know every single detail about our critters and plants, their responses making it even more clear just how wrong professor Thonne had been to screw with my and Wesseck¡¯s grades like that.


    Still, eventually the interview came to an end and we made our way down off the stage. After a few minutes to grab a quick snack from one of the cookbots the event planners had gotten set up, I asked ¡°Well, is there anything else you want to do around here for now, or should we go looking for something else to do?¡±


    Wesseck answered ¡°Personally I¡¯d really like it if we could stick around for Chitin¡¯s interview. I want to know what those three have to say, plus it¡¯ll make it easier for us to get in touch with her afterwards.¡±


    I thought about that for a few moments, and remarked ¡°Yeah, I think that would actually be a good idea. I¡¯m interested in what the media crews will ask them, and I definitely think a post-interview chat would be nice.¡±


    Queen agreed as well, and we proceeded to spend the remaining few kiloseconds waiting for Chitin¡¯s turn cruising around the convention center peeking into various other teams¡¯ interviews. Turns out those guys with the corrosive trees suffered total organism extinction within mere kiloseconds of initial deployment on account of attracting the aggression of every single organism in the area, and we all had a good laugh as they tried to explain the thought process that lead to them thinking it was a good idea to have such an indiscriminate offensive adaptation.


    Still, eventually the time slot for Chitin¡¯s interview came around, and we all took the opportunity to grab front row seats as the three instances of our favorite spider girl made their way onto the stage, though only in the one body this time.


    I eagerly took the opportunity to wave to Chitin as they glanced at me for a moment, her face adopting a happy expression as she saw me greeting her. Then the interview started and Chitin was all business. They explained in elaborate detain how the doomgrass and thrushes were optimized to cooperate for territory control and rapid proliferation, the anti-predator defenses they¡¯d use to avoid getting eaten, and a whole lot of other points about ecological strategy that would hopefully lead to getting an egg by the end of the observation period.Enjoying this book? Seek out the original to ensure the author gets credit.


    A couple kiloseconds passed before Chitin got off the stage and came to greet us at one of the on-site eateries.


    Wesseck spoke up first, saying ¡°Hi Chitin! You did an awesome job on that presentation, the reporters got really hyped up for the details on your grass and birds.¡± as they resumed guzzling ice cream.


    Chitin chuckled ¡°I¡¯m glad you enjoyed it, we put a lot of thought into making sure it was entertaining and informative. You guys did a pretty good job on yours too.¡±


    A few minutes passed as we ate our lunch together in relative silence. The burrito machine we¡¯d stopped by had supplied each of us with a tasty wrap, and we were entirely focused on our food. Still, the meal disappeared relatively quickly.


    Then Queen asked ¡°Well, what now? Competitors generally aren¡¯t allowed to edit their organisms after deployment or else the whole thing just turns into a massive hacking competition, so is there anything else for us to really do aside from simply sitting and waiting?¡±


    Chitin thought for a moment, before replying ¡°Look into other bio-engineering work in the meantime I guess? Most competitors in the Blackwood Invasive Species Tournament are either academic faculty of some description or have some sort of day job they work on between tournament seasons. There¡¯s still a couple Megaseconds before your next semester starts up I believe?¡±


    I said ¡°You know that¡¯s actually not a bad idea. Getting a temp position at a biotech group like Hammer and Bennet could be a nice way to get a bit more professional biological engineering experience under my belt. I think I¡¯ll give it a go, at the very least it¡¯ll be something to do.¡± after mulling it over for a bit.


    That¡¯s when Queen interrupted, noting ¡°Personally I think you¡¯d have more fun as a bespoke morph designer. People are willing to pay quite a lot for custom work in that regard, and you¡¯ll get a lot more creative freedom than you would with one of the big operations that churns out mass-produced bio products to ensure basic societal function.¡±


    I mused ¡°Guessing you¡¯re talking from personal experience there, Queen?¡± as I thought back to her remarks from a little while ago.


    Sure enough Queen responded ¡°Yep. Spent a while designing microbes for a few biotech collectives. Not much creative freedom there, and it¡¯s very limiting. On top of that there¡¯s a lot less room in those big operations for people to get work done since they automate everything to such a massive degree, meaning that it¡¯s generally a lot easier to break into the artisanal custom product space than it is to get a spot in industry.¡±


    I thought for a moment, then asked Wesseck ¡°Hey, do you mind if we use the lab space as a studio for custom morphs? I think it¡¯ll work just fine as a spot to do that in, and it¡¯ll save us the trouble of needing to find another place.¡±


    Wesseck cheerfully answered ¡°I¡¯m all for the idea, this is a great plan and I want in on it too. Queen, you want to spend some time doing morph design?¡±


    Queen immediately replied ¡°Absolutely. This sounds like a wonderful thing to spend our time on, and it¡¯ll be a lot more fun than big industrial projects. As an added bonus having an excellent immune system is a major selling point for any morph; no-one wants to get infected with a nanoweapon after all.¡±


    Across the table, Chitin was looking quite happy with herselves, but took the opportunity to get up, noting ¡°Well, nice that you¡¯ve all figured out what you want to do with your time, but we¡¯ve got other commitments that mean we sadly won¡¯t be able to join your enterprise.¡±


    It was about a megasecond and a half later when a tournament official came by and told us ¡°Good news, you¡¯re getting the Platinum Egg for your submission¡¯s exemplary performance in the tournament. The award ceremony is in a Megasecond.¡±


    My jaw dropped in shock and I couldn¡¯t help but stammer out ¡°But¡­ why? We¡¯ve kept track of the tournament listings and though our entry has managed to secure a niche, it hasn¡¯t displaced too many of the existing species. By all accounts it¡¯s only worth a Bronze Egg.¡±


    Wesseck looked up from their work on the latest customer¡¯s morph, asking ¡°Yes, I¡¯d like to know that too. Why exactly are we getting the Platinum Egg?¡±


    The official raised up a tentacle to object, then slowly lowered it before asking ¡°Wait, how do you not know about this already? The coverage of events on the Thundersnow Steppes has been all over the sports channels for an entire Megasecond already.¡±


    Queen meanwhile was looking massively smug in the background, her expression making it quite clear she knew exactly what was going on but had elected not to tell us.


    After several moments of silence, I grudgingly admitted ¡°Yeah I kind of just got really engrossed in the custom morph business and lost track of time on that front. I haven¡¯t really been paying much attention to the tournament since the organism deployment and the interviews.¡±


    The official laugh-cried into their tentacles ¡°You mean you don¡¯t know!? You won the Platinum Egg and you didn¡¯t even pay attention to how your organisms were doing!? That has to be one of the most ridiculous things I¡¯ve ever heard of happening in the entire history of the tournament.¡±


    Wesseck just shrugged helplessly, and the official simply replied ¡°Please make sure you get to the award ceremony on time. It¡¯s the same place as you had the interviews so it should be pretty easy to find.¡± in an exasperated tone before leaving.


    As the door closed behind them, I remarked ¡°We should probably look up why we¡¯re getting the Platinum Egg for this. Obviously something big happened and I want to know what it was.¡±


    Wesseck immediately replied ¡°No way, we¡¯ve gone this far without knowing and they¡¯ll tell us at the award ceremony. I want it to be a surprise and don¡¯t either of you dare tell me what happened.¡±


    After a bit of time I admitted ¡°Yeah, on second thought I don¡¯t want much in the way of spoilers either. The idea of knowing what happened down on Blackwood ahead of schedule isn¡¯t actually all that appealing.¡±


    A few moments later Queen confirmed what I¡¯d suspected already ¡°I already know what¡¯s happened and I think you two not wanting to know until the ceremony is absolutely hilarious. Still, it¡¯s an absolutely hilarious story and I¡¯m definitely going to tell you sometime.¡±


    I just chuckled ¡°We¡¯ll take your word for it Queen.¡±


    Meanwhile back down on Blackwood squirrel F1203 was acting as midwife for the birth of the sixth generation of squirrels. The pups were birthed without quills and would need to keep to the safety of the burrow until they could grow to maturity, but that was fine.


    In particular, F1203 was overseeing three other squirrels, making sure that the pups came out smoothly. Sure enough the three litters were born shortly thereafter. F1203 quickly started supplying the mothers with boomnuts and water to ensure their milk flowed fast and nutritiously, even as the pups were busily suckling at their mothers breasts.


    Still, at the back of all the adults¡¯ minds was the fact that these pups would eventually be required to venture forth into Blackwood¡¯s unforgiving terrain and serve the survival of the colony. There was no love or compassion here, just the cold hard logic of species propagation as programmed into the ruthless little creatures by Yures.


    While the squirrels kept busy with their eternal war against the rest of Blackwood¡¯s biosphere, the boomnut bush this particular nesting site was built around was in hunter-killer mode. Its roots were tunneling through the dirt in search of hostile plants and micro-organisms. After several kiloseconds, it finally logged what it had been looking for: trace concentrations of Microbe ID f420b750b12e.


    Immediately it started diverting symbiote through the root network to both initiate hostilities on the subversive microbe in question and identify the microbe¡¯s concentration site. Several minutes of searching later, the bush had identified that the concentration site must be at least a kilometer away. Symbiote was already tearing into the nearby tendrils of f420b750b12e¡¯s web of mind control, but there was no way that would be able to disable the concentration site anywhere near fast enough to prevent another fireball event.


    And so the bush dispatched a force of thirty squirrels armed with boomnuts to investigate the concentration site and destroy it if at all feasible. The squirrels with the most surface-to-air missiles at the ready quickly grabbed two boomnuts apiece and with their ordnance at the ready they made their way in the direction of the concentration site.


    It didn¡¯t take long for the squirrels to start noticing the signs of a f420b750b12e concentration site ahead of them, as there were already several dozen suborned laser falcons flying around and keeping the allied thrushes away from the airspace. The squirrels simply closed to a range of a few hundred meters under cover of doomgrass, and once they were sure they were in the clear they each fired well over a hundred of their anti-air missile quills.


    The laser falcons tried to react, they really did. But that many guided rocket quills coming after them was just way more than they could realistically deal with. So it was entirely unsurprising when the laser falcons were blown out of the sky in a barrage of explosions, clearing the airspace for further action.


    The ally thrushes of course took that opportunity to move in for the attack now that doing so wouldn¡¯t get them instantly lasered out of the sky. The wide variety of land animals that had been suborned into digging the concentration pit were immediately subjected to electrified talons and gouging and razor-sharp feathers, even as the squirrels exploited the distraction to move into a perfect firing position.


    Moments later the ally thrushes were warned to get clear of the blast radius via radio and immediately began frantically climbing away from the animals they had been savaging. Moments later all thirty squirrels volleyed a barrage of high explosive quills into the mob, immediately killing or crippling the vast majority of specimens.


    All obstacles in the way having been removed, the task group of squirrels came into close range and got a solid look at the pit.


    Immediately the squirrels tasked to dealing with this concentration site were able to tell that this one was still in the early stages. While there was a pit starting to show the refined heavy metals that f420b750b12e produced as part of such a location, there were still no signs of the complex artificial structures characterizing the later phases. As such the gardener response would be used.


    Immediately all thirty squirrels got to planting their boomnuts in growth mode in rings around the concentration site pit. As soon as that was done they fired every last mind control quill they had into the ground at the site. This would be a fight of microbe on microbe, so every last cell of symbiote they could get into the combat area would be needed.


    Immediately the task force radioed back that they would be securing this new nesting site until relief forces arrived. Their anti-air munitions had been significantly depleted and they were out of symbiote supplies, so the backup was needed with great urgency.


    Soon enough a return message from the massive fortress known as the Thicket arrived, confirming that another fifty squirrels were being sent over to build up the newest outpost of squirrel and thrush territory.


    Beneath the feet of the thirty, a microbial war was being waged as Queen¡¯s masterpiece tore into Togi¡¯s work. On a cell-to-cell level, Togi¡¯s microbe was massively outclassed by what it was up against, and quickly started dying back. Still, the symbiote had started at a massive numbers disadvantage, and unlike Togi¡¯s microbe hadn¡¯t yet plugged into a photosynthesizer for power. Quickly the symbiote started to run out of energy and fall back, the boomnuts still needing time to sprout and start metabolizing sunlight.


    Fortunately before Togi¡¯s microbes could regain the advantage through attrition, the second force of squirrels came in to renew the assault with even more boomnuts and quills in the ground, the first round of boomnuts breaking through the soil to start photosynthesizing only a few minutes later.


    The tense times were largely over now. Yes there were still major concentrations of Microbe ID f420b750b12e beneath the new nesting site, but they were being firmly disposed of now. This land was squirrel territory now, it just didn¡¯t know it yet. And more to the point, a disaster like the first time a concentration site went unattended would not be happening here today.

 Sabotage

    Right from the start of the tournament¡¯s deployment phase, Veronica and Rat¡¯s laser falcons had been doomed. Their design had been thoroughly compromised by Togi during the engineering phase of the tournament, and making matters even worse for them he then exploited these vulnerabilities to use the birds as hosts for a parasitic nanoweapon. On its own submitting a parasite for the tournament would have been within the rules, but sabotaging the work of another team to host said parasite was very firmly listed as a violation. Still, Togi didn¡¯t much care about winning so long as he could ruin everyone else¡¯s fun, so he did it anyway.


    As such, the instant that the laser falcons deployed into the skies of Blackwood, they were already infected with Togi¡¯s griefing bacteria. At the moment there wasn¡¯t any signal being emitted from the second phase of the nanoweapon¡¯s activities, but soon enough that would change.


    The first samples of Togi¡¯s nanoweapon to come into contact with a plant ironically got there thanks to the artillery squirrels deployed by the Snow Coast Symbiotes. The volleyed surface to air missiles were highly effective at blasting laser falcons out of the air, but by the same token also splattered bits of those same falcons all over the local landscape. Bits of infected blood and gore landed on plants and animals all over the region, and swiftly the nanoweapon got to work suborning hosts.


    Some organisms were able to fight off the infection and logged it for future reference, with the work of Doctor Sagi Brose and his student Queen Shed slapping it aside with contemptuous ease. However many other organisms were not so lucky, several plants and animals being thoroughly suborned for the benefit of the parasite. The animals were allowed to continue their normal behaviors for now, since it still wasn¡¯t time.


    However the plants were now forced to extend their root networks down and sideways, linking up with other infectable plants to produce a vast solar power array to power the underground activities of the microbes in question.


    This is when Blackwood first took notice and started fighting back. This sort of nanoweapon driven encroachment was a direct threat to every susceptible plant species, and they were designed to have precisely none of it. Vast waves of toxins and symbiotic microbes were released into the soil to beat back the infection, the ground itself becoming highly corrosive in some locations due to the intensity of the biochemical war being waged below the surface. For a time these measures were, broadly speaking, effective, but that wasn¡¯t to last.


    Only now did Togi¡¯s nanoweapon call in animal support, legions of suborned laser goats, murder ants, lesser firefoxes, and other susceptible yet destructive animals coming forth to tear into the resisting plants. Many trees, grasses and brambles were utterly destroyed in the ensuing war, the sessile organisms having the disadvantage of being in a static position when faced with highly mobile attackers. Ones with quite a long range in the case of the laser goats.


    However the Boomnut Bushes were far too fiercely defended for this sort of assault to easily dislodge them by this point. Not only had the squirrels been busily at work fortifying the terrain and Queen¡¯s nanoweapon making the ground thoroughly inhospitable to Togi¡¯s creation, but by this point an alliance with Chitin¡¯s doomgrass, thrushes, and soil fixers was well on its way to flourishing.


    So not only did the oncoming swarm of attackers find themselves without a clear line of fire, they also found themselves having to fight through massive barrages of squirrel artillery and swarm attacks by electricity-wielding birds. Not to mention that the doomgrass spreading around and inside the fortresses of the squirrels was violently ripping encroaching organisms apart. It wouldn¡¯t have been able to resist Togi¡¯s nanoweapon infection on its own, but Queen¡¯s symbiote boosted the defenses enough to make up the difference.


    Still, Togi¡¯s nanoweapon had other things it could be doing in the meantime. Case in point, it could be performing its primary function of concentrating, refining, and most importantly enriching heavy actinide series metals into an easily usable form. It took a great deal of downwards expansion of the tendril network, but a third of a Megasecond in and the microbe could get deep enough for levels of the relevant elements to notably increase from their surface concentration. Other metals were similarly extracted and formed into specific components.


    During this period the suborned animals were called in to act as a labor force, first digging a pit where the concentrated metals could be found. Next they assembled the first set of components into a fabrication printer, which both vastly accelerated the construction of further components, and also began production of more sophisticated labor units to speed up the digging and construction. A basic industrial base established, Togi¡¯s creation started printing components for its true project.


    The machine now started assembling those components into a very specific configuration, constantly getting bigger as more and more materials were added. After a bit the concentration site stopped going for actinides and instead started concentrating rare Hydrogen isotopes, discarding the normal protium as a waste product. However the structural metals continued being extracted and built into the structure as it extended out of the pit.


    Gradually a conical shape took form, towering several meters into the air. Togi¡¯s nanoweapon registered completion as the last piece clicked into place, and the command for the activation sequence was begun.


    Immediately several cannons fired to spread pods of Togi¡¯s microbe hundreds of kilometers across the Steppe and surrounding environs. A few minutes later when it was clear they had gotten out of the danger radius, the detonators went off. A core of almost pure Uranium 235 was crushed to the point of nuclear fission, the massive fusion secondary was lit off, and a wave of thermonuclear fire washed over the Thundersnow Steppes, immediately incinerating all lifeforms caught within.


    Several of the Artillery Squirrel nests were destroyed or heavily damaged, but the survivors immediately went into crisis response mode. They had already known that the microbe responsible had a major presence in the direction of the fireball, now it was only a matter of determining an appropriate response to the problem of surprise nuclear fireballs from nowhere.


    Squirrel M115 had been relatively lucky; he¡¯d been underground in his nest¡¯s burrows for sleeping which had sheltered him from the worst of the blast. Clambering up onto the surface level, several problems immediately made themselves apparent. Several squirrels were injured, the defensive berm had been partially flattened, and most pertinently the boomnut bushes were on fire.


    PETN wasn¡¯t liable to explode just from being set on fire, but there was no hope of extinguishing the flames, that was for certain. Even if firefighting equipment were available it wouldn¡¯t have been possible to extinguish; high explosives were self-oxidizing and would keep burning no matter what you did to them, barring drastic cryogenic measures.


    M115 therefore opted to focus his attention on more productive endeavors, namely coordinating the evacuation from the burning nest and subsequent rebuilding efforts. A radio signal calling for all still living squirrels to respond went out, and M115 was grateful to receive several responses even from those squirrels not currently visible wandering around above ground.


    Immediately, M115 joined the crew working on evacuating the nursery. There were squirrels still down in there, and between the smoke and heat they could very easily perish if not evacuated from the burrows in time. So M115 jettisoned all his quills to avoid them igniting in the rapidly heating tunnels, pushed his fear to one side, and charged into the inferno.


    The tunnels were filled with smoke as the roots started lighting up with more self-oxidizing flames, M115 knowing it was only a matter of time before the burning remains of the bush seared through the tunnel walls and started making safe navigation of the burrow impossible. So the squirrel hurried with all his speed, soon arriving in the nursery chamber where new artillery squirrels were brought into the world in relative safety.


    M115 quickly grabbed a pair of pups in his mouth and started carrying them out of the tunnels towards the exit. He¡¯d barely gotten halfway when he encountered another squirrel coming the other way and handed off the pups for her to take the rest of the way.


    M115 was painfully aware of the temperature increasing in the burrows as they went back for another two pups, then another. Tiny flickers of flame were starting to lick through the tunnel walls already on the fourth trip, M115 collecting the last pair of pups from that particular nursery chamber and running for all three of their lives towards the exit.


    Unfortunately for M115, that¡¯s when his luck ran out and a section of ceiling came down on top of him. Another squirrel got the pups out and brought them to the surface, even as M115 desperately tried to dig himself out of the cave-in. Alas it was not to be, as a large gout of flame finally burst through the walls of the tunnels and started burning him to death, overwhelming even the temperature limits of the finest bio-technology. That said, M115 didn¡¯t die fast; their body was built with an absolute refusal to go down easily, automated bypasses routing around damaged organs and other such things to keep M115 alive and functional for as long as possible.


    Still, it was ultimately futile, the rising temperatures in the tunnels causing a total breakdown of M115¡¯s body in very short order.


    Meanwhile above ground squirrel F660 was busy ensuring the defense of what was left of her home. Among other things this included breaking open the discarded quills of those who had gone to rescue the pups and feeding them to those currently without so that they could grow new ones faster, before the replacement boomnut bush could start growing. Still, she¡¯d barely gotten halfway through this when one of the lookouts alerted her to several airborne predators streaking through the skies towards the nests.


    F660 still had her full complement of surface-to-air missiles, so the job of dealing with this problem fell to her. Quickly whirling around she spotted eight incoming airborne organisms. It took a mere fraction of a second to task several dozen quills to each target, and then F660 fired. Rocket-propelled quills streaked through the air and two of the organisms went down, but these were proper aerial predators that were already on their guard against such things. So they managed to shoot a significant fraction of the incoming missiles out of the air. In desperation F660 unloaded her entire remaining missile complement of several hundred missiles in an attempt to shoot down the attacking beam bats, knocking another four out of the air in conjunction with the rest of her nestmates.Stolen from Royal Road, this story should be reported if encountered on Amazon.


    For a moment it seemed hopeless with anti-air munitions depleted, then the surviving ally thrushes streaked into the sky, electrified talons at the ready. The beambats attempted to react, they really did. But this time they were being swarmed from all sides and couldn¡¯t spin around to cover all the angles fast enough. The thrushes closed to melee range with the extreme swiftness offered by their afterburners, and soon enough the beambats found themselves being ripped apart in midair by the swarms of ferocious birds.


    The immediate crisis over, F660 and the rest of the squirrels turned their attention to rebuilding. The charred remains of the boomnut bushes that had once sustained them were starting to burn out now, so the absolute first thing on the agenda was to plant new ones and get boomnut production back up and running as soon as possible. Clearing the stumps would take too long, so the squirrels instead opted to put the boomnuts in at an offset from their previous locations, prioritizing speed over neatness.


    Immediate survival mostly secured, F660 then took the opportunity to listen for the homing signals of all the other boomnut bushes out there. As expected all the nests closer to the blast site had been utterly destroyed, either having been within the fireball or simply pulverized by the overpressure and heat. However, further out the squirrel nests were reporting being almost unscathed.


    Given the situation, F660 immediately requested both aid and an investigative task force. A nest a kilometer or so further from the blast had managed to avoid the worst effects, so they quickly reached an agreement to send over a supply of a couple hundred boomnuts and a fifty squirrel investigative team.


    The squirrel nests didn¡¯t quite see eye to eye on everything, but one thing the squirrel/bush/symbiote triad were absolutely certain of was that whatever happened could not be allowed to occur again. They needed to identify the organisms responsible, locate major concentrations and how they operated, and develop a strategy to keep them from reaching this stage of their life cycle ever again.


    As the squirrels stared up at the slowly dissipating mushroom cloud, a decision was made that a group would need to march into the crater to recover what evidence could be found in the smoldering ruin. M1331 was one of the squirrels sent out on the first fact-finding mission, with the explicit instruction that their radio was to be kept active at all times to send back information.


    Five other squirrels formed up, and together they began their march into the inferno. The terrain they passed over was charred and burnt as expected, the many varieties of grass on the Thundersnow Steppe having been instantly ignited by the infrared flash from the nuke. Some types of grass had handled the flames better than others; Chitin¡¯s doomgrass had been designed to be extremely flame retardant among other features, while other grasses had been purposely designed to go up in a blaze at the slightest provocation.


    Still, that just meant that some grasses were still partially intact while others were gone entirely, with entire patches of the steppe being entirely barren of unburned plants. M1331 was sending back every single observation of the danage, noting what plants and animals had survived as he moved closer to the blast site.


    Then the survivor rates started dropping off closer and closer to zero as M1331 reached the edge of the crater proper. Several organisms had been vaporized entirely, leaving nothing but carbon silhouettes in their former positions, and as the terrain transitioned to nuked-solid glass the survivor rates became a complete and utter zero.


    It was already starting to rain at the blast site, particulate matter kicked up by the blast having provided condensing surface in the clouds above. M1331 noted the rainout washing off his quills as he approached the pond forming in the middle of the crater, but was largely unaware of the radioactivity. Admittedly he didn¡¯t need to worry about that too much on account of having been designed for extreme radiation tolerance, but more pressingly the crater filling with water threatened to make whatever evidence could be found at the center of the blast site inaccessible.


    So the group of squirrels hurried further into the desolation, racing against the rainfall to reach the center before it was completely flooded.


    The team of six got there in the nick of time, a significant puddle already forming at the bottom of the crater. Diving under the water, there was a notable difference in the composition of the heat-fused substances making up the bottom of the crater. Instead of glassy fused dirt and rock, here there was a much more metallic composition to the ground.


    Thinking quickly, M1331 determined that any surviving cells of the responsible organism would be buried some distance into the metallic layers, since the heat from the blast would have killed anything too close to the surface. So using the high explosive quills in their arsenal and their already existing burrowing claws, the squirrels started to dig.


    Three squirrels were assigned to establishing a berm to keep the water out of the dig site for as long as possible, quickly setting about the task. Meanwhile M1331 began blasting his way into the terrain, trying to reach a depth that didn¡¯t look to have been fried too badly.


    After a few minutes of blasting and scooping the debris away to be added to the dike, M1331 saw it, the un-fused terrain he¡¯d been looking for. Quickly scurrying down into the puddle at the bottom of the hole, the squirrel grabbed a small piece of dirt and popped it into his mouth for analysis.


    Immediately M1331¡¯s immune system registered an attack by a hostile nanoweapon, quickly containing and identifying the responsible strains of microbe. Further analysis picked apart exactly how it would go about attacking a host, what it would do with them once suborned, and most importantly that in the soil it would concentrate heavy metals exactly like what had been observed at the bottom of the crater.


    Culprit found, M1331 and the rest of the squirrels started back towards the nest, keeping their radios going as they traveled. The rain had picked up massively, M1331 being rendered soaking wet by the storm as he climbed out of the crater.


    Still, as the squirrels marched through the cinders of the steppes passing corpses and charred remains, M1331 was busily conversing with the other squirrels in the team. They had a suspicion of what had happened, they knew what organism was responsible, now they just needed to make sure that it never ever happened again.


    On arrival at the recovering squirrel fort, M1331 made his way straight to one of the more intact burrows and promptly fell asleep. The other squirrels who didn¡¯t need to recover from a heavy dose of radiation could take it from here.


    One of these squirrels was F1202, and her assignment was to lead a reclamation crew to one of the nests that had been closest to ground zero. Yes all the squirrels there had died and the bush had burned to cinders, but the triad could not afford to give up territorial coverage that it needed to keep the blasting microbes in check.


    And so F1202 began her march as one of fifty squirrels, aiming to reclaim a nest that had since been blown to rubble. Yet again a crew of squirrels marched into the burned and blasted no-being¡¯s-land produced by Togi¡¯s nuke, this time with a different destination in mind.


    En route they encountered a herd of laser goats that the ally thrushes had warned them about, but the group of artillery squirrels was ready for this. A volley of mind control quills from cover quickly suborned the herbivores, and off they went trotting back to the nest to bury themselves for composting. Obstacle removed, F1202¡¯s group continued towards the nesting site.


    What they found was a destroyed ruin. The bush had burned out completely, many of the exterior fortifications had been leveled, and all the tunnels had been forcibly collapsed by the shock wave. In many ways it was like starting over.


    Fortunately the squirrels and their thrush companions had the capability to do exactly that. Quickly they planted their boomnuts in a hexagonal grid pattern around the ruined site, both preparing a minefield and ensuring that at least one nut would be kept intact until reaching maturity. At the same time the thrushes were dispersing doomgrass seed across the same general area as the squirrels were busily reclaiming.


    Quickly F1202 put in a radio request for the standard forward base provisioning while they waited for on-site boomnut production to start up, and got a reply indicating that yes there would be a convoy system set up in fairly short order.


    Now it was just a matter of holding the location until the bush could start producing its nuts. F1202 wound up on lookout duty while other squirrels did the burrow digging, keeping a look out for incoming predators.


    Compared to the normal levels of hostility that would have to be dealt with, the process of securing this base was honestly shockingly easy. The normal hostility of Blackwood¡¯s biosphere had been largely blasted and burned away, leaving a distinct dearth of lifeforms to cause problems. There were still the occasional problems, such as a wandering grazer that got nailed with some mind control quills and used for fertilizer, but there were far less than normal for this sort of thing.


    Still the good times had to end eventually, a flight of laser falcons making their unwelcome presence known. F1202 was ready on the surface-to-air missiles immediately, blasting them out of the air without too much trouble. Still, the fact that they would have bothered flying in here where there wasn¡¯t much to prey on was distinctly suspect. As such F1202 was sent out to locate where the corpses had fallen and check them for nanoweapon contamination.


    F1202 quickly reached the site of the fallen laser falcons, the corpses having been thoroughly mangled by the exploding quills that had slammed home. Quickly collecting a bit of blood from the corpse, F1202 brought it up to her mouth. Immediately her immune system identified it as the exact same microbe that M1331 had found, signals quickly being sent out to all squirrel nests and ally thrushes in repeater range.


    The microbe was immediately assigned the ID f420b750b12e as the symbiotic alliance figured out what they were up against. They didn¡¯t know how, but it was now clear that this microbe was responsible for the massive explosion that had killed so many squirrels and destroyed so many nests. Furthermore, it was now indicated that unusual laser falcon behavior would be a good indicator of this microbe¡¯s presence.


    The thrush network processed the data for a bit before sending a reply that they would begin active searches for laser falcons behaving in an atypical manner, as the organisms all got onto a war footing. They knew what they were up against, they knew enough about it to start fighting back, and now they knew exactly what would happen to them if they didn¡¯t.


    A few kiloseconds later, the thrushes had reported another flock of strangely behaving laser falcons. The squirrels had promptly advanced into a position to shoot them down, and shortly thereafter the ally thrushes had unhindered access to the airspace. They immediately noticed a large metallic structure in the process of being constructed, looking ominously close to reaching the point of completion. Acting on a hunch Squirrel M357 and eight more were assigned to demolish it as fast as possible, each carrying two boomnuts to do the job.


    The animals and working automatons surrounding the structure were easy enough to break, High Explosive quills doing a number on them and crippling their ability to fight back. Then the squirrels scurried through the gaps of the structure to find themselves inside a machinery room with a fabricator working away and several other bits of important looking machinery.


    It was barely possible to figure out what was important and what wasn¡¯t in here. There were disgusting-looking microbial growths connected to most of the heavy machinery, a core of some heavy metal was hanging suspended above the factory floor, working drones were in the process of constructing some sort of storage tank until M357 blew them up, and there was an overall sense that this place should not exist on this planet.


    The squirrels quickly placed their boomnuts in all the actively moving machinery and jettisoned all of their incendiary and explosive quills inside before promptly exiting the structure. They sent the detonate command to the boomnuts they¡¯d left behind, and with a loud ¡°whumph¡± mixed with the sound of tearing metal and flames igniting, the bombs went off.

 Revenge of the Genome

    It didn¡¯t take long for M357 to confirm that the structure they¡¯d just disabled was absolutely filled with Microbe ID f420b750b12e. While the machinery had been demolished for the moment, it was extremely clear that if the site was left unattended it would very quickly recover and go right back to working towards another fireball.


    Quickly conferring with some of the other squirrels, M357 radioed back to the thicket. They would need hundreds of boomnuts here as quickly as possible, since the site needed to be converted to a squirrel fortress in order to eliminate the microbial threat lurking below. Very quickly, M357 got a reply telling him to hold position until relieved.


    One of the other squirrels with M357 called back to note that they had depleted their stocks of explosive and incendiary munitions and their ability to hold would be very limited, especially since a large number of predators were starting to show interest in the site.


    Sure enough, M357 could clearly see beam stalkers lurking in the brush around the site along with several other organisms. A salvo of mind control quills at each of the uppity investigating predators quickly sent them on their way to the compost heap, but it was very clear that was a solution with only limited viability.


    Case in point, M357 only barely managed to dodge a harpoon from an Impaler Beast, returning fire with mind control quills as the barbed tendril was retracted. The Impaler fired again, spearing M357 right through the center of mass as it started to pull him back in.


    Just off to one side F999 watched helplessly as her fellow squirrel was pulled in and devoured by the ravenous predator, busily keeping an eye out for other incoming threats. The nanoweapons coursing through the Impaler¡¯s bloodstream finally took hold and it started back towards the nearest squirrel nest, but it was already far too late for M357.


    Then F999 heard something wonderful from above, as the call of an ally thrush sounded over her. Several boomnuts fell from above as the birds descended to keep an eye on the situation, the level of stress dropping massively as F999 ate one nut to regrow some of her quills then set about planting the rest around the conical structure.


    According to the radio there were still several minutes before the rest of the artillery squirrels sent for relief would arrive, but F999¡¯s stress levels were massively declining now that she didn¡¯t need to worry about holding a hostile location with only mind control quills and no air support.


    A hundred kiloseconds later, the fortress around the cone was now well established with boomnuts growing rapidly, a basic set of dug fortifications and burrows set up around the perimeter, and the ground below finally purged of nuke-happy microbes.


    M1011 was resting in the fortress in question when he heard the alarm; another concentration site had been detected. So somewhat grumpily the squirrel stowed a couple boomnuts in his cheeks, formed up with about fifty others, and off they went to go lock down the area and avoid another nuclear fireball happening right in the middle of their turf.


    This one was going fairly well all things considered; the laser falcons were easy enough to eliminate with surface to air missiles and the guard animals around the pit didn¡¯t take too much effort now that the artillery squirrels and thrushes knew what they were dealing with.


    However, M1011 noticed something on the horizon that called for an immediate halt. There were hundreds of Brose¡¯s Wyverns in the area, all circling a site like they did on their nesting grounds. That presented if anything an even worse threat to the squirrels than the fireballs did.


    So M1011 quickly radioed back to base, asking about what to do. There weren¡¯t any squirrel nests in the blast radius of the concentration site if it managed to go off, however the Brose¡¯s Wyvern nest might be in range. So M1011 got the order to go investigate and measure the distance between the dragon nesting grounds and the concentration site, while the rest of the squirrels evacuated the blast radius.


    Grudgingly M1011 marched off towards where he saw the wyverns, keeping to cover as much as possible. After around three minutes of walking M1011 spotted the nest and was immediately able to confirm that yes, the dragons living there were definitely in the blast radius of the concentration site.


    That done, M1011 immediately started scurrying back to (relative) safety as fast as he could possibly manage. He had to blow up several ambush predators en route including a pair of cloaking shockers and a holosnake, but those were relatively minor concerns compared to getting out of the way of that many Brose¡¯s Wyverns and also escaping the blast radius of the concentration site.


    Despite his panic M1011 managed to make it back to base unharmed, and immediately got a chance to rest before he was put on minefield duty.


    About forty kiloseconds after that, the concentration site exploded as the squirrels had expected it to do. Fortunately they didn¡¯t have to deal with any casualties or destroyed nests this time, but they still heard the roar of the blast and felt the ground shaking beneath their feet.


    M1407 was immediately assigned as part of the crew to investigate the Wyvern nesting site and secure the crater, getting the obligatory two boomnuts as they prepared to go secure the new territory that had just been blasted clear of any possible competition.


    The walk into the blasted wasteland was eerily silent once they got past the chaotic rush of various deadly organisms dashing around in a panic about what just happened. In comparison to the rest of Blackwood, the burnt and blasted no beast¡¯s land in and around the crater was almost serene.


    Sure enough, the wyverns¡¯ nesting grounds looked to have been completely incinerated by the nuclear fireball. There wasn¡¯t a single trace of living cells anywhere on the surface, and the ground had been thoroughly glassed.


    M1407 radioed back to confirm, and was told to dig in and establish a squirrel fortress on the site. Looking at the fused glassy terrain, the squirrel would have been tempted to sarcastically ask how if that sort of neural wiring had been included. But it hadn¡¯t, so instead the squirrel simply used a few high explosive quills to blast a divot in the ground, before setting down a boomnut in growth mode.


    Slowly, agonizingly the leaves started to appear as the nut greedily soaked up the rain that was even now beginning to fall. The roots started eating their way into the glassy terrain to get at the dirt below the surface level.


    Now the question was how to go about fortifying the site; there were some leftover bumps and dips in the terrain from the incinerated remains of the Wyvern nest and the symbiote would eat through it to make soil in a while, but at the moment it presented the problem of being nearly impossible to dig through without putting in a blast.


    Fortunately they had a fair number of boomnuts on hand in addition to what was ¡°planted¡±, so M1407 joined the rest of the squirrel team in doing just that, blasting the ground with high explosives to try and pulverize it to a state they could work with. This kind of worked, but it was also very slow going, and was burning through the onsite stocks of explosives like nobody¡¯s business.


    Fortunately everyone still had a good deal of ordnance left when the next fifty squirrels showed up to relieve them, M1407 marching back to base to rest and recuperate for a while as the next crew worked.


    The second crew quickly exhausted all their explosives working the terrain into a suitable form, as did the third and the fourth. It wasn¡¯t until the fifth group of squirrels that the crater base reached a tolerably habitable condition, the barren glassed scar in the wasteland still having not been fully recolonized by Blackwood¡¯s incredibly dangerous biosphere yet.


    Meanwhile off on the entire other side of squirrel territory, a routine scouting mission by the ally thrushes had discovered a newly dug concentration site far too close to the thicket for safety.


    F1440 was assigned as part of the task force sent to put a stop to this particular threat, along with another sixty squirrels. That said, there was an issue; while the concentration site was less than three kilometers away, there was a river between the thicket and the target. This didn¡¯t present much issue for the ally thrushes since they were very capable of flight, but it presented a major challenge for the artillery squirrels, who didn¡¯t have any terribly good ways of crossing the river.


    Yes, the artillery squirrels could swim. However the aquatic organisms who had actually been designed for river swimming were far better at it and few would turn down such easy prey as a land-dweller trying to cross. In addition the fact that the river was an aquatic environment negated the squirrels¡¯ best defense, since their quills would quickly lose momentum in the dense fluid medium and they lacked any that were suitable for underwater self-propulsion.


    So when she reached the edge of the river, F1440 found herself looking into the depths with a distinct feeling of apprehension. The ally thrushes could not airlift her across, they simply lacked the lift capacity. Trying to float or swim across meanwhile would be an act of suicide on account of the many vicious predators and even the occasional opportunistic herbivore or omnivore lurking in the water.


    It was actually one of the ally thrushes who suggested bombing their way across; if they dropped several hundred boomnuts into the river and detonated them all at once, then it would briefly clear a volume of water. F1440 radioed back to the thicket and the plan was quickly approved, a massive flock of ally thrushes getting together to airlift bombs for deployment into the river.


    It only took a couple kiloseconds for everything to be ready, hundreds of boomnuts having already fallen into the river where the needlefish and other horrific creatures were curiously inspecting them. Then F1440 sent the command to detonate.Unauthorized reproduction: this story has been taken without approval. Report sightings.


    Immediately the river fountained up in a massive geyser of water, foaming white from the level of energy imparted by the blast. Before the water had even started to fall, F1440 ordered the charge across the river, dashing forwards to the riverbank with every bit of speed she could muster. The rest of the squirrels followed after, and soon they were in the water.


    Swimming frantically towards the other side, F1440 spotted an Impaler Beast lurking on the other shore, doubtless waiting for the squirrels to get into range for some impromptu spearfishing. F1440 was having precisely none of that, and immediately fired thirty high explosive quills into the beast, which dutifully tore its launching trunk to ribbons.


    Gruesomely injured and with its main weapon disabled, the Impaler Beast slunk off to lick its wounds. A few moments later F1440 managed to reach land, scrabbling desperately back up onto solid ground. Another few moments passed as F1440 waited for the rest of the squirrels to get out of the water, but upon a more thorough counting it was clear that they¡¯d lost twenty one squirrels in the crossing. The river was already turning into a feeding frenzy as various organisms took their chance to eat squirrels and the exploded corpses alike.


    Still, F1440 was across along with more than thirty other artillery squirrels, and they had a concentration site to shut down before it could blow up the others that they¡¯d left behind. So onward they trudged, keeping to cover in order to avoid being spotted by the obviously suborned laser falcons circling ominously overhead.


    Carefully keeping watch of what the falcons were doing, F1440 spotted one of them coming in closer for an investigative swoop, and immediately responded by firing off two hundred surface to air missile quills.


    The entire rest of the laser falcon swarm around the concentration site was alerted instantly as the laser-armed bird frantically tried to shoot down the incoming missiles, squawking out alerts on all the radio channels it had. Still, fifty missile quills slammed home, sending the falcon into a burning tailspin right towards the ground.


    The other thirty falcons in the air had immediately whirled around at the alert, only for the remaining squirrels to unleash a combined salvo of thousands of surface to air missiles. Hundreds of them were shot down as they crossed the intervening airspace, but hundreds wasn¡¯t enough. Within seconds every last laser falcon had been hit several times and blasted out of the sky, with the ally thrushes quickly descending to finish the job with their electrified talons.


    Now that the airspace was clear F1440 could advance, the concentration site quickly coming into view amid a throng of suborned animals. There was a bit of structure sticking out of the pit, but not too much considering the circumstances, meaning this site was still in the early phases. On the other hand, that was a lot of laser sheep and railgun bears guarding the site, presenting a major problem for any further attempts to get through. The thrushes couldn¡¯t get too much closer without being lasered out of the sky, and being subjected to railgun bear counter-battery fire wasn¡¯t any squirrel¡¯s idea of a good time.


    So F1440 watched from the top of a hill as she tried to work out a plan. Then she noticed that the particular types of grass growing around the concentration site were a particularly flammable variety, liable to go up in a blaze the moment it was ignited.


    So in her capacity as artillery spotter, F1440 radioed back to the other squirrels for an incendiary strike on the site. After a moment or so, the barrage of quills arcing through the sky was quite evident to F1440, but the laser goats apparently didn¡¯t spot it at first. Then the quills slammed home into the ground, touching off their payload of solid rocket fuel.


    The grass immediately lit off into a massive inferno, flames roaring across the landscape as temperatures near the concentration site started approaching 800 Kelvin, well beyond the survivable temperature range for any of the animal species involved in guarding. Still, despite the inferno none of them made to escape, the simple programming of the nanoweapons using them as guards preventing them from exercising their normal survival instincts.


    Momentarily checking to ensure that the grass she was hiding in was a flame-resistant variety, F1440 settled in to wait. It took a couple kiloseconds of waiting for the fire to burn out, but sure enough it depleted its fuel and the squirrels could move in to investigate the site in more detail.


    A couple dozen boomnuts chucked in the hole proved quite capable of disabling all the machinery that was currently operating down there, but that still left the major issue of the microbes that had started the whole mess lurking beneath the surface.


    Fortunately, it was already known that the symbiote was more than capable of beating Microbe ID f420b750b12e in a fight. And both boomnuts and the mind control quills had an ample supply of symbiote to go around.


    So F1440 and the rest of the squirrels started digging in to plant their boomnuts even as they fired all their mind control quills into the ground to unleash their nanoweapon payload. Still, now came the hard and brutal job of holding the site against the entirety of Blackwood until it could be made into a full-fledged squirrel fort.


    There wouldn¡¯t be any reinforcements; crossing that river had been ruinously expensive in both boomnuts and squirrel lives. By the same token, retreat was impossible; there was no way they¡¯d ever make it back across the river intact. The full extent of logistical support they could receive would be care packages of boomnuts airlifted by the ally thrushes.


    So F1440 started in on the digging, with the absolute first priority being a nursery chamber. The squirrels needed a way to replenish their numbers to survive, and the only way that would be happening was if they started reproducing.


    With thirty squirrels on excavation duty, that left nine for guarding. M2091 was one of the squirrels in that role, frantically scanning the airspace and brush for threats as he tried to protect the other squirrels. The planted boomnuts had just barely poked through the ground and started putting out their first leaves by the time M2091 spotted the first threat in the form of a beam stalker lurking in the bushes.


    M2091 immediately fired a high explosive quill at it, the blast sending the predator scurrying off to lick its wounds. Still, that particular predator wasn¡¯t the worst case scenario.


    No, the worst case scenario was the sneaky predators that were already trying to sneak into the nest. Case in point, M2091 only barely detected a holographic snake attempting to enter the under construction nursery room. A split second later he¡¯d impaled it with a deactivated high-explosive quill, the simple kinetic energy being quite sufficient to immobilize the snake up against a wall.


    Then M2091 closed in for the kill. The snake was definitely a biter rather than a squeezer, and the fact that M2091¡¯s back was covered in barbed quills made landing a bite nearly impossible. The snake had no such defense now that its stealth had been ruined, and a furious artillery squirrel started ripping the uppity snake to shreds.


    As he surfaced again M2091 noted that the boomnut bushes were growing rapidly now, and the thrushes had come through on delivering some supplies. Native boomnut production still wasn¡¯t up and running, but it would be coming soon, and in the meantime at least he had something to eat.


    As M2091 dipped down into the tunnels to eat a nut and replenish his ammunition reserves, another squirrel was quickly overseeing the situation to figure out what if anything would need doing. The burrows already had rooms designated for boomnut storage, nurseries, resting, waste disposal, and drainage. Similarly the boomnut bushes were already progressing as fast as they could. The only real thing left to do aside from reproduction, waiting, and embiggering the burrows was to get on with the defensive berms.


    So F1600 got to work on the digging, engaging in the agonizingly slow process of shoving dirt into position. Even with twenty other squirrels on the job it was slow going, but between guard duty and ensuring the first litters of pups came out properly there simply weren¡¯t enough others on hand to make it go smoothly.


    A few kiloseconds in there was a call for all topside squirrels to strike a lurking pack of Siege Oxen that had been trying to sneak up on the nest, the heavily armored herbivores absorbing hundreds of high explosive and incendiary quills each before they finally retreated. Still, aside from that interruption there wasn¡¯t much to the work aside from simple monotonous labor.


    After a while, F1600 shifted off the berm construction job to go get something to eat and take a nap. As she did so, she noted that the bush closest to the pit was finally sporting a ripe boomnut, ready to be plucked and eaten. F1600 did so, chewing on the nut as she made her way down into the burrows. There was still a long way to go, but with the boomnuts finally ripe for harvest and the first batch of pups well on their way to being born, the first squirrel nest on this side of the river had finally been fully established.


    A couple kiloseconds later, squirrel F2331 was born into the world in the burrows beneath that self-same nest along with five other pups. She was quickly picked up by one of the squirrels acting as nursemaid and placed up against the nipples on her mother¡¯s belly, drinking greedily of the milk that flowed forth.


    She was still nowhere near ready to face the world, and wouldn¡¯t be fully matured for another two hundred and ninety kiloseconds. But she couldn¡¯t get the rest of the way internally to her mother, meaning that she had to do it externally.


    After a few minutes of breastfeeding, F2331 pulled away from her mother and switched to F1600, who was currently on nursemaid duty. There was still a lot of milk-feeding to go before her teeth and digestive system would be ready to eat boomnuts, but her mother was out of milk for now and another source was required.


    Still, that source was available, the nest was relatively safe for the time being, and the future was looking bright for the artillery squirrels, the boomnut bushes, and their symbiotic partners. Even better, by all appearances that bright future didn¡¯t seem to be illuminated by the onrushing inferno of a nuclear fireball.


    Back in the lab on Bark, I had opted to wear my androgynous body to the award ceremony after much mulling over what if any gender I felt like this morning. On the other hand I was distinctly stuck on what clothing to wear on top of it. Did I wear a dress, a two-piece, jeans and a jacket, or something completely different? I knew I definitely didn¡¯t want to go nude, but trying to figure out an outfit was proving very difficult.


    I spent several minutes staring at my closet paralyzed with indecision as I tried to come up with something, before Wesseck eventually came and found me.


    Wesseck said ¡°So, any reason you can¡¯t just wear your normal casual clothes to the award ceremony? I¡¯m not planning on wearing anything special.¡± as they looked around at my wardrobe.


    I replied ¡°But I¡¯m going to be on live broadcast in front of the entirety of Bark! Everyone¡¯s going to see me and judge me for it.¡±


    Wesseck blinked, before replying ¡°If you care that much about not being judged for your appearance, you should really just wear a rent-a-morph to the event. But seriously, just because we¡¯re getting the platinum egg doesn¡¯t mean that suddenly everyone is going to care what you look like. It¡¯s not a fashion contest, we won a sporting event, plain and simple. It¡¯s your capabilities that people are going to care about, not your looks.¡±


    After a moment of thought, I asked ¡°So you¡¯re saying I should just wear something comfortable then, and not care what people think of me for it?¡±


    My friend hummed happily as they answered ¡°That¡¯s exactly it, Yures! ¡°


    My worries somewhat assuaged, I put on a pair of athletic shorts and a tube top with a hole in the back for my wings. After a bit of fiddling I set the animation on the top to show some leaves swaying back and forth in the wind, which I thought looked nice.


    Clothes picked out, I went down to breakfast. Wesseck had opted for a simple white jumpsuit fitted for their spidery form. Meanwhile Queen had gotten out the formal power armor again. We had a quick breakfast of omelets and sausage, then we made our way to the train station for the express line to the convention center. We were quickly shuffled off to the back stage areas, and after a few minutes we settled in to wait.


    We were still waiting backstage for our public appearance. A gentle and dexterous bundle of tentacles named Hazel was helping me tidy up my appearance for the big event, when I finally got up the courage to ask ¡°So, what exactly happened to get us the platinum egg anyway?¡±


    After a few moments of silent staring, Hazel asked ¡°You mean you still don¡¯t know? Have you been living under a rock?¡±


    As I hesitantly nodded to confirm, Hazel slumped for a bit and said ¡°Alright, I¡¯ll tell you.¡±

 Let the Banhammer Fall

    Hazel started up her tale with ¡°So, there was this griefer named Togi who wanted to ruin everyone¡¯s fun by nuking the entire tournament. Thing is his plan failed hilariously fast, not only on account of the tournament officials shutting him down, but also because your squirrels figured out how to stop the nukes from going off almost immediately after the first one. Well, aside from that one time they deliberately let one of them go off to get rid of a Brose¡¯s Wyvern nest. Anyway the guy got arrested for psych abuse and blacklisted from the tournament, so he¡¯s not too likely to cause any more problems.¡±


    I thought about it for a moment. That would be a valid reason to get a favorable rating from the judges, beating a cheater like that fair and square.


    Still, part of it was bugging me, and after a few moments I figured out what it was.


    So I asked ¡°Curiously, how¡¯d he sneak nukes into the tournament anyway? I highly doubt he was loading complete thermonuclear warheads into the deployment pods, that¡¯s the sort of thing that would get caught instantly so it had to be cleverer than that.¡±


    Hazel paused for a moment, then answered ¡°Yeah, it was. Though it wasn¡¯t at all nice. Basically he joined a team as their immune specialist, then constantly gaslit his teammates into doubting their own judgments so they wouldn¡¯t notice him sabotaging their organism to act as a host for his own nanoweapon. From what I hear his victims are still in therapy trying to repair the damage he did.¡±


    Morbidly curious, I asked ¡°Er, what team did the asshole sabotage anyway?¡±


    Evidently not thinking much of it, Hazel answered ¡°Bird Strike. Why?¡±


    That was Veronica¡¯s team. I felt myself crumple inwards as tears started rolling down my face, the sudden realization of just what my friend had gone through slamming home hard.


    I just sat there crying as Wesseck and Queen both rubbed up against me.


    After several moments, Queen admitted ¡°I might have had something to do with this, indirectly. Back at the start of the tournament I said some trash talk to Veronica to get her off balance, and it might have lead her to make a rash recruitment decision about the griefer.¡±


    Seeing our state, Hazel sighed ¡°Don¡¯t blame yourselves, either of you. Togi was always going to try and find a victim for him to abuse, it was sheer rotten luck that he happened to hurt someone you know.¡± as she gently pulled us into a hug with her hundreds of tentacles.


    I leaned into the hug as I replied ¡°¡¯m not blaming myself or Queen. I¡¯m just feeling bad that one of my friends went through something that shitty and want to make sure she¡¯s doing alright. Definitely going to be talking with Veronica first chance I get.¡±


    As we were released from the hug I heard Queen mutter ¡°Still kind of blame myself on an emotional level, even that I intellectually know it¡¯s not true.¡±


    As Hazel released Queen from the hug, she asked ¡°So, do you think it would help if I explained how they actually arrested Togi in the end?¡±


    I immediately replied ¡°Yeah.¡± and Hazel launched into her story.


    Some time prior to this, Reze Drossen was in her office as regional supervisor for the Blackwood Invasive Species Tournament when an alert went off on the main display for her computer. Immediately setting her lunch aside to take a look, she was confronted with the icon indicating a nuclear explosion had taken place on Blackwood¡¯s surface.


    Immediately Reze started sifting through information to learn as much about the incident as could be gleaned from the sensor data. First of all, it had happened smack dab in the middle of the Thundersnow Steppes, meaning the offender had almost certainly been a competitor for that region.


    Reze immediately reviewed the footage of the site from just before the blast as she compared it to the list of organisms entered into the tournament. Sure enough, none of the records indicated an organism that would construct a massive piece of nuclear ordnance then set it off after dispersing seed, which meant that someone had smuggled a creature in somehow.


    Grumbling, Reze pulled up the entire list of organism specs in their full detail as she started cranking through them in search of discrepancies. It took her nearly four kiloseconds of searching even with her brain running at absolute maximum power, but in the end it was fairly obvious.


    ¡°Found you.¡± grumbled the six armed woman as she opened up the file on the laser falcon submitted by team Bird Strike. To her practiced eye, the immune system showed obvious signs of sabotage, precisely calibrated to allow an extremely specific nanoweapon to use the bird as a host without any difficulty. It would have been fairly normal if Bird Strike had a symbiotic microorganism listed as part of their submission, but they hadn¡¯t.


    Quickly, Reze pulled up the details on the team members. Veronica Machinae, Rat (no surname found), and Togi Sorresh. She located Veronica and Rat pretty quickly, with the both of them currently being treated for psych damage inflicted via gaslighting. Immediately, she could write the both of them off as being the culprit; that sort of psych damage indicated that all the blame for this laid on Togi.


    Now that just left the question of where exactly Togi had gone.


    Of course, Togi knew exactly where he was. Namely, he was still on Bark milking his prestige as a tournament competitor for all it was worth to pick up one-night stands.


    To be more specific, at the moment Togi was at a brothel and casino named the Capsule Shaker, being emotionally manipulative to several of the staff.


    It had started innocently enough, with him wandering up to the hooker desk and asking ¡°Hey, can I have a girl for the night? Someone with lots of tentacles and a spicy attitude.¡±


    The synthmorph-wearing lady behind the desk looked Togi up and down in response to that, her creep alarm bells ringing louder and louder the more she looked. Still, he hadn¡¯t actually said or done anything legally actionable yet.


    So under the reception desk, Ishe quickly typed out a message ¡°Nyx, we¡¯ve got a creep at the desk. I want observation protocols on whatever room he ends up in, you know the drill.¡±


    There were a few moments before Nyx replied, Ishe¡¯s inbuilt knee cam letting her see the concealed screen as it read ¡°Got it. I¡¯ll have the creep cams running every single moment and security drones ready to break it up if the guy does anything to our girls.¡±


    Meanwhile above the desk, Ishe replied with fake confidence ¡°I know just the girl for you, sir. The normal fee of 120 Glesse will apply, before I can hook you up.¡±


    Togi grinned as he leaned in over the desk and well into Ishe¡¯s personal space, ¡°Oh, you mean there¡¯s no special discount for tournament participants?¡±


    Ishe answered immediately ¡°Not for you there isn¡¯t. A night of time with one of our girls costs one hundred and twenty Glesse, and that is final. Pay up or get lost.¡±


    At the same time Ishe very carefully did not say that she¡¯d seen countless creeps like Togi go through the doors to the rooms in back and come back out with a police escort dragging them off for a court appearance a few kilos later.


    All that aside, Togi did eventually pay up the full requested amount, grumbling about how he was entitled to better treatment than this the whole time.


    Ishe was of course completely unimpressed by the entitled whining, simply directing him ¡°Room 8A. Reevaun will be waiting for you.¡± and unceremoniously terminating the conversation with an incredibly obvious death glare.


    Togi of course took one last opportunity to be a creep, shooting a lecherous grin at Ishe as he proclaimed ¡°I¡¯ll be back to satisfy you too later!


    As soon as the door closed, Ishe muttered ¡°I¡¯ll be satisfied when you¡¯re dragged off to your trial and not one moment sooner.¡±


    The next few minutes were spent doing normal secretarial work, screening messages and checking up on who wanted to contact the Capsule Shaker.


    As it turned out, the top four messages were all from law enforcement. Ishe quickly opened the top one and after a full read mentally summarized it as:


    ¡°Is Togi Sorresh at your establishment? There is an arrest warrant on him for psychological abuse, sabotage of personal work, and unlawful deployment of a nuclear weapon.¡±


    Ishe read the message very quickly as her thoughts ground to a halt. There was a wanted criminal in the back of the brothel doing who knew what to Reevaun. Immediately, Ishe forwarded the message to Nyx even as she composed a reply.


    ¡°To: Bark Public Safety Bureau


    From: Capsule Shaker Brothel and Casino


    Togi Sorresh is at our establishment and currently engaged in paying intercourse with one of our members. He will likely be occupied in that position for at least two kiloseconds, and is in Room 8A. Should we leave him unaware of your approach, or attempt to detain him with our security drones?¡±


    Please come quickly.¡±


    It only took a few seconds for Ishe to get a reply of ¡°Understood, we¡¯re on our way. Do not alert Togi of our approach in any way. We should be there in eight minutes.¡±


    Ishe of course forwarded this message to Nyx, who immediately replied that she wouldn¡¯t sic the security drones on Togi without an excuse, but the instant she got a safety alarm from Reevaun or saw something untoward on the creep cams she¡¯d be sending in the drones.


    And so Ishe sat there, nervously waiting for law enforcement to arrive. To her immense relief there weren¡¯t any signs of the abusive git in question actually doing anything aside from really freaking out Reevaun with how he was talking about her, and the arrest team from the police arrived right on time as expected.Enjoying the story? Show your support by reading it on the official site.


    As the four war-morphs and several drones walked up to her desk, Ishe quickly confirmed their identities before telling them ¡°Togi¡¯s in the back, room 8A¡± and opening the door.


    The quartet readied their electro-lasers and started dashing down the hallway in absolute silence, quickly reaching the room Togi was in.


    Then the door slammed open, and things got a bit more complicated as Togi already had Reevaun between himself and the door, resulting in her acting as a transhuman shield. For all of a few seconds as the four officers dashed to get at him from an angle he wasn¡¯t obscured and immediately started zapping him with their taser beams.


    Togi dropped instantly, his morph¡¯s nervous system being completely jammed by the electrical waveforms going through it as Reevaun dashed off to safety. The current was let up after a bit, then two of the officers pinned Togi down as a third shoved an arrestor mindcast probe into position, while also injecting a nanoweapon to force authorization for mindcast.


    After a couple moments, Togi¡¯s morph went limp as the arrestor probe confirmed a successful mindcast. There were a few moments of shuffling around as the drones hauled Togi¡¯s morph off to be recycled, but by and large the arrest was complete.


    The next thing Togi knew, he was sitting across a virtual table from an attorney. The first thing that came blathering out of Togi¡¯s mouth was ¡°Who are you supposed to be?¡±


    The severe-looking synthmorph replied ¡°I am Bax Govo, your publicly assigned defense lawyer. Togi, the charges laid against you are very serious.¡±


    Togi just waved it off with ¡°Pfft, all I did was tell some lies and have some fun with the tournament, no big deal.¡±


    Bax narrowed his eyes in a distinctly unimpressed expression before he replied ¡°Togi. You are being accused of deliberately gaslighting two innocent people and leaving them with significant psyche damage-


    Togi interrupted with ¡°Eh they¡¯ll be fine it was just a jo-¡± before finding his ability to speak abruptly cut off by Bax muting him.


    Bax continued ¡°You are being accused of deliberately gaslighting two innocent people and leaving them with significant psychological damage as a result. Furthermore, you are being accused of sabotaging their personal work, and deploying a nuclear weapon. If you are convicted of these charges after a trial, you are almost certainly going to be subjected to forcible re-formatting with little regard for continuity of identity, and there is an over ninety nine percent chance of being convicted with the amount of evidence being leveled against you.¡±


    As Bax spoke, Togi¡¯s expression started at smug satisfaction and just kept getting even smugger as the charges were listed. Then Bax got to the section on Togi¡¯s likely fate if he was convicted and the slightest hint of worry appeared on his face for the first time in the entire conversation.


    Bax then un-muted Togi, and he immediately started yammering ¡°Hah, this is nothing. I¡¯ll walk right in there, tell them I¡¯m innocent and sorry and then I¡¯ll be in the clear, works every time.¡±


    Mr. Govo then asked ¡°Tell me, Togi, has any of your previous victims brought you to the attention of law enforcement? No? The rules have changed from what you are used to. The judge will not care about your insincere words, she will simply convict you on the evidence. If you plead guilty you will likely only be institutionalized until you are guaranteed to be reformed. Pleading innocent will only get you punished more severely.¡±


    Togi blew it off again with ¡°No way, I¡¯m not going to confess to something I didn¡¯t do, and it wasn¡¯t that bad anyway. Lemme tell the judge abou-¡±


    Bax Govo muted Togi again and stood up to shout ¡°TOGI. You are not anywhere near as special as you think you are. Dealing with people like you is Judge Merrin¡¯s job. She is very good at it and will see through all your deflections and lies instantly. She has authority to charge you with perjury if you do that, which will only reduce your opportunities for appeal further. There are millions of entitled manipulative narcissists out there on Bark, and once people know what one of you is like, they can spot the rest of you within seconds of exposure. Take the plea deal, or they will have you reformatted.¡±


    Togi simply sat there, glaring. After several minutes of tense standoff, his expression still hadn¡¯t changed one bit, and neither had Bax broken off his stare.


    Eventually, Togi replied ¡°No. I will be found innocent, I¡¯m absolutely sure of it.¡±


    Mr. Govo simply shook his head as he replied ¡°I cannot legally force you to plead guilty. That said I can absolutely guarantee that by doing this you are making a big mistake. The courts chew up people like you and spit them out every day, and you will be no different.¡±


    A few kiloseconds later, Bax and Togi were seated in the defense box of the courtroom. Across, the prosecutorial team was busily readying their assorted collections of evidence. Meanwhile Judge Merrin was doing some routine administrative work as she waited for the official start time, her small fleet of effector drones massively multiplying her efforts.


    Still, sure enough the clock hit the designated time, and Judge Merrin announced ¡°Court is now in session. Defendant, you stand accused of psychological assault, sabotage, and deployment of a nuclear weapon. How do you plead?¡±


    Immediately Togi answered ¡°I didn¡¯t do it and it wasn¡¯t a big deal!¡±, the prosecutors eagerly recording everything he was saying.


    As Mr. Govo groaned quietly in exasperation, Judge Merrin narrowed all twelve of her eyes.


    Then she repeated ¡°Defendent. Answer the question. Do you plead innocent, or do you plead guilty?¡±


    Togi called out ¡°I plead innocent!¡±


    Bax slammed his face into hands and tried not to cry as the prosecutors shot him sympathetic looks.


    After a few moments watching the display with an unimpressed expression, Judge Merrin announced ¡°Understood. In that case the prosecution may present their case.¡±


    Reginald, the lead prosecutor replied ¡°Certainly.¡± before firing up a volumetric projector showing an image of Blackwood. They quickly fiddled with the settings, and suddenly a pinprick of light appeared on the Thundersnow Steppes.


    Pointing this out, Reginald said ¡°On day 130 at 8600 seconds, a nuclear device with a yield of twenty megatons was initiated on Blackwood¡¯s surface. Since the only objects being sent to Blackwood¡¯s surface in the relevant timespan are organisms for the tournament and none of the capsules thus launched contained live nuclear ordnance, that meant there had to be an organism which assembled the nuclear device on site.¡±


    There was a brief pause before Reginald pointed out ¡°This hypothesis was confirmed by a second nuclear explosion of twenty megatons yield approximately two hundred kiloseconds after the first, but by then we had already determined that the laser falcons submitted by team Bird Strike had been sabotaged to harbor a nanoweapon without their designers¡¯ knowledge.¡±


    That¡¯s when Togi interrupted with ¡°Yep, damn fine work too if I do say so my-¡±


    Then Bax shouted over Togi¡¯s objections ¡°PERMISSION TO MUTE MY CLIENT, YOUR HONOR?¡±


    Evidently none too pleased at Togi¡¯s antics either, Judge Merrin immediately replied ¡°Motion granted.¡±


    Bax immediately pressed the relevant button on the remote for Togi¡¯s court-provided morph, and his mouth locked shut.


    That episode of courtroom antics being over, the defense continued ¡°It was at this time when the Public Safety Bureau learned that Togi¡¯s team-mates Rat and Veronica Machinae had been hospitalized for psychological damage inflicted by deliberate gaslighting.¡±


    Togi was reaching for the remote to un-mute himself, but Bax snatched it away at the last moment, allowing the prosecution to continue speaking.


    This continued for several kiloseconds, Togi repeatedly sabotaging his own laywer¡¯s attempts to defend him while handing the prosecution ever more evidence to use against him whenever he could get a grip on his remote to let himself talk.


    Still, after a while things reached a point where Bax couldn¡¯t take it anymore. He¡¯d put the remote in his chest pocket to keep it away from Togi, but he apparently considered that a challenge.


    As such, the instant Bax was distracted, Togi reached for Bax¡¯s pocket to try and make a grab for the remote.


    This was the last straw, as Bax shouted ¡°Your honor, I would like to press sexual harassment charges against Togi Sorresh!¡±


    Judge Merrim took one look at the situation and asked ¡°You are no longer going to represent Mr. Sorresh in this case?¡±


    Practically crying, Bax called out ¡°I¡¯m invoking the Impossible Client Act, please get me out of here!¡±


    Nodding, Judge Merrim replied ¡°In that case, I am calling a recess to allow for a replacement lawyer. Mr. Govo, you can go now.¡±


    Immediately, Bax made his way to the exit of the courtroom.


    Predictably, Togi unmuted himself in the intermission and immediately started running his mouth about all sorts of ¡°amazing¡± things he¡¯d done before the trial. The prosecution was of course taking careful notes as was Judge Merrim.


    There were still a couple minutes before the new lawyer arrived when Reginald noted ¡°Your honor, we request to add perjury to the list of official charges.¡±


    Judge Merrim nodded in agreement as she noted ¡°You may present your case when the trial resumes.¡±


    A bit later a new lawyer arrived, ready to take over Togi¡¯s defense. A kilosecond later they announced an intent to press charges, invoked the Impossible Client Act, and left to commiserate with Bax out in the courthouse¡¯s lobby.


    Togi had a smug grin on his face as he sent another lawyer off in a huff, thinking he¡¯d found a loophole that would let him stall out the trial for as long as he wanted.


    It was a similar story for the third lawyer, then the fourth. They arrived, made an honest effort to represent Togi, and then he harassed them into pressing charges and leaving.


    That¡¯s when Judge Merrim noted ¡°Togi Sorresh. You have gone through four lawyers in less than a day. By the terms of the Impossible Client Act, you are entitled to no more of them. Since you have already proven incapable of representing yourself without simply incriminating yourself further, I am ending this farce now.¡±


    ¡°I hereby find the defendant guilty on five counts of psychological assault, one count sabotage, one count deploying a nuclear weapon, two counts sexual harassment, one count pickpocketing, one count attempted murder, and seventeen counts of perjury. I sentence him to forcible reformatting into a decent person, to be affected at the soonest possible date.¡±


    There was a brief moment of Togi dashing towards the judge¡¯s podium, probably to try attacking her. Then the overrides in his court-provided morph activated and he instead started walking off towards the Mindcast bay.


    Anyway, it wasn¡¯t visible any way aside from the mind state logs once he was uploaded for reformatting, but he was having a major panic attack all the way there. Every last deflection and manipulative tactic had completely and utterly failed, and now he was being marched off to complete and utter obliteration as a person.


    That¡¯s about when I interrupted Hazel¡¯s story to ask ¡°Wait, how do you know all this stuff? His arrest and the trial were plausibly public record with a little bit of artistic license here and there, but his internal thoughts as he was being marched off for reformatting? What?¡±


    To this Hazel cheerfully replied ¡°I guessed!¡±


    There was a brief pause before she admitted ¡°More seriously I got the details from an investigative journalist who¡¯s a friend of mine.¡±


    Queen looked a bit askance at this before asking ¡°And where did they get it?¡±


    Hazel shrugged with a few dozen tentacles as she answered ¡°I mean ultimately either someone got the dirt from the people doing the reformatting or it¡¯s an unfounded rumor that sounds neat. Personally I prefer the world in which it was for real.¡±


    Wesseck tilted their head a bit as they replied ¡°Yeah, it does have a nice dramatic flare to it that the other option doesn¡¯t. Everything else was definitely true though?¡±


    Hazel perked up a bit as she replied ¡°Mostly. I will admit to embellishing all the legal protocol stuff a bit for streamlining, but all in all it was generally pretty accurate.¡±


    After a bit of thought I replied ¡°Well, it¡¯s nice to know why we¡¯re getting the Platinum Egg now at least. Especially since Queen was being a troll and refusing to tell us.¡±


    At that, my draconic friend chuckled and replied ¡°You know I¡¯d honestly forgotten whether you even asked me or not, but it seemed like such a fun idea to retroactively claim that¡¯s what I was doing. Besides, you could have looked it up at any time.¡±


    We were all still laughing at our own expense when an announcement came to our phones telling us to get to the stage.


    Really quickly I asked Hazel ¡°Do I look alright? Please tell me I look alright.¡±


    Hazel just chuckled and replied ¡°You three are the most famous team on Bark right now, what you¡¯re wearing will define fashion for everyone else, not the other way around. Now get out there and knock ¡®em dead!¡±


    Right, no pressure. We¡¯re only setting a massive example for everyone around us to follow in terms of fashion.


    Pushing down my stage fright, I turned towards the projected curtain separating me from the audience of the award ceremony and walked forwards. After a few steps I emerged into the lights and noise, immediately feeling the urge to flee. But no, I¡¯d come much too far to back down now. I¡¯d earned that platinum egg fair and square with my teammates, and I wasn¡¯t going to let something so minor as stage fright ruin it now.

 Award Ceremony

    There was a massive array of podiums all around the convention hall. I could already see the various golden egg winners around including Chitin, all of them excitedly talking to reporters about the whole situation. I really didn¡¯t want to be here, talking to the reporters when I hadn¡¯t had this much pressure on me was bad enough. Still, I was being frog-marched to the podium to receive the platinum egg along with my team.


    Quietly, I whispered to Queen as I walked ¡°Er, can you see any way for me to sneak out of here once the awards are over? I really don¡¯t want to be here. Way too much pressure to talk to reporters.¡±


    There was a brief pause as Queen thought, before answering ¡°You could fly out, perhaps, but that would get everyone¡¯s attention guaranteed. Probably your best bet is to ask the award people for help with a discreet exit; they¡¯ve doubtless dealt with people who didn¡¯t really want the attention before.¡±


    I thought about it in silence as we walked down the median between two massive mobs of reporters, cameras flashing several times per second as we got closer and closer to the podium and my anxiety levels built up higher and higher.


    As we reached the stairs and started climbing, I came to the conclusion that if I had to put up with this level of publicity constantly afterwards, I¡¯d simply move somewhere the trophy meant nothing instead of sticking around here on Bark. This level of attention simply wasn¡¯t worth it.


    Several more thoughts whirled through my mind on the way up, including a few dirty fantasies about firing heavy ordnance into the crowd of reporters, but they mostly fell away as I reached the top and was greeted by none other than Doctor Sagi Brose.


    I will admit to being quite shocked at finding my academic advisor here of all places, stammering ¡°Professor! You¡¯re here. Um. Hello? I have no idea what to do right now.¡±


    My professor nodded as he replied ¡°That¡¯s alright, Yures. There¡¯s not much to it. I hand you the trophy, you say a few things to the crowd, and then you can leave.¡±


    After a bit of thinking I remembered to ask ¡°Professor, is there any way I can get out of here that¡¯s discreet? I really don¡¯t like the mob of reporters and don¡¯t want them following me once this is over.¡±


    Thankfully professor Brose pulled through for me, pointing out a door to the back stage areas right behind the podium. As he did so, he noted ¡°You can exit through there. It should be a mostly reporter-free zone, hopefully.¡±


    I whispered ¡°thank you.¡± and then the ceremony began.


    Patching into the amplifiers, doctor Brose announced to the crowd ¡°People of Bark, I hereby announce the winners of the Blackwood Invasive Species Tournament. Yures Hann, Queen Shed, and Wesseck of the Snow Coast Symbiotes.¡±


    I stepped forwards, and my professor retrieved the platinum trophy from somewhere or other before he handed it to me.


    The trophy was pretty heavy even in Bark¡¯s gravity, which was to be expected of a sizable chunk of solid Platinum. Still, I was able to hold it without too much strain, especially on account of passing it to Queen as soon as possible.


    A few moments of silence passed as Queen lofted the trophy high, then I heard doctor Brose mutter to me ¡°Say something, anything. The whole of Bark is listening.¡±


    So I took a deep breath, screwed up all my courage, and said ¡°You know, I never actually intended to go for the platinum egg. I would have been perfectly happy with a bronze egg, maybe a silver. The whole reason I even got involved was only because a hardass professor took his personal issues out on my grades.¡±


    There was a brief pause as I continued ¡°Still, I had a whole lot of fun and made quite a few friends along the way. I learned a whole lot about how to make a viable organism that can survive on Blackwood too, which was pretty neat. Finding out the squirrels did so well actually came as a pretty major shock; we were thinking they¡¯d get a minor ecological niche at most, rather than effectively turning their region into squirrel country. All in all, I¡¯m pretty happy with how the tournament went.¡±


    Doctor Brose smiled his sharp-toothed approval as he whispered ¡°You can get out of here now, Yures.¡±


    Nodding, I replied ¡°Thank you professor Brose.¡± and quickly used my wings to glide down off the podium to ground level. I quickly snuck through the door into the back stage, and started making my way towards the exit.


    I quickly found out that Hazel was waiting for me, greeting the friendly ball of tentacles with ¡°It¡¯s nice to see you again, Hazel.¡±


    Hazel chuckled as she replied ¡°Nice to see you too. How¡¯d it go?¡±


    As we started walking alongside each other, I answered ¡°It went pretty well actually. Guessing you¡¯re here to show me to the exit?¡±


    Hazel was about to reply when suddenly there was a flash, and I turned dazzled to see a camera drone hovering just off to our side.


    There were a few moments of silence before the drone spoke up, saying ¡°Hah! Knew you¡¯d try to escape through here. Now gimme an interview.¡±


    I immediately replied ¡°No. I won¡¯t give an interview to anyone.¡±


    The drone leaned in menacingly before saying ¡°Oh you will. After all, it¡¯d be a shame if everyone heard about your secret love affair, wouldn¡¯t it?¡±


    I blinked, before asking ¡°You know I¡¯m not romantically involved with anyone, so it wouldn¡¯t be an affair, right?¡±


    The drone laughed ¡°Of course I know that. But you think the public will care? I¡¯ve got photographic evidence and I can use it to write up a piece on whatever spicy scandal I damn well please if you don¡¯t give me that interview.¡±


    I stared at the drone as I replied ¡°That¡¯s illegal. I can sue you for defamation as soon as you publish your article.¡±


    Off to the corner I noticed Hazel taking the opportunity to call security, and motioning for me to keep this asshole distracted. Fine, I could do that.


    As for the drone, his reply of ¡°You really think that will stop me? Your reputation will still be trash afterwards even after I have to issue a retraction, and it¡¯s not like I can¡¯t share the story around to a bunch of other clickbait sites looking for scandal. Now. Give me that interview!¡± rang of desperation.


    I just snarked back ¡°Gee that¡¯s an empty threat even if you do mean it. I was already half-way planning on moving somewhere I¡¯d never been heard of to avoid all the publicity, and if you go through with that threat, all you¡¯ll have done is tip me over the edge towards moving to elsewhere. I¡¯ve let my mark on Blackwood with my friends, I¡¯ve proven my capabilities as a bio-engineer, and any system in inhabited space would be glad to have me.¡±


    That apparently struck a sore point, as the drone answered ¡°You wha-¡±


    That¡¯s about when Hazel took out a mag pistol and unceremoniously shot down the drone, the exploding coilgun projectile penetrating right to the center of mass before it went off. As she did so, she unimpressedly noted ¡°Security had traced the connection and were closing in on his location already. There wasn¡¯t any point to letting him keep talking.¡±


    Turning to the friendly ball of tentacles I asked ¡°Can I please have a hug? That whole thing was really stressful and I don¡¯t know what to think about it.¡±


    Hazel obliged, wrapping me in her tentacles and squeezing tightly, but gently. As she did so, she asked ¡°If there¡¯s anything you want to say about what happened, please?¡±


    I thought for a moment, before asking ¡°Am I doomed to get hounded by paparazzi like that for the rest of my lives if I stay here? That guy was willing to commit actual crimes just to get an interview with me.¡±


    Hazel sighed, before replying ¡°It¡¯s just because you¡¯re new on the scene. In a Gigasecond there¡¯ll be thirty more tournament winners and no-one will care that you happen to have a trophy from so many tournaments ago.¡±


    Nodding as I leaned into the hug, I said ¡°Hazel, it¡¯s been nice talking to you and I¡¯m glad to have met you, but I need to go check on Veronica. She¡¯s been one of my friends for a long time, and I need to make sure she¡¯s feeling better after what Togi did to her.¡±


    Hazel let go and waved me on as she said ¡°See you again Yures, I hope your friends are alright.¡±


    As I left the convention center in search of my friends, I replied ¡°I really hope so too.¡±


    Still, there were a couple things I had to do before I could go looking for Veronica. First on that list is telling Queen and Wesseck what I was actually doing. I took care of that with a quick text message to each of them, and now I was stuck trying to figure out where exactly Veronica was actually located.


    Figuring that the best option would be to simply call her, I did just that. There were several moments of waiting for Veronica to pick up, but eventually she answered.


    I greeted her with ¡°Hey Veronica, it¡¯s Yures. Sorry for not keeping in touch with you during the tournament.¡±


    There was a moment of silence before I got Veronica¡¯s reply ¡°Thanks for calling in, Yures. It¡¯s been¡­ an ordeal.¡±A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation.


    I softened my tone a bit as I said ¡°I heard. Would you mind if I came to visit you? I want to catch up on events and make up for all that time we lost.¡±


    Veronica laughed bitterly ¡°Hah, I lost time in the tournament. You only spent it. Still, seeing you again wouldn¡¯t be unappreciated.¡±


    That¡¯s about when I said ¡°About that, where are you right now? I don¡¯t actually know where to come visit you at, that¡¯s why I¡¯m calling.¡±


    Veronica quickly replied ¡°Cthonic Mare General Hospital. In the psych ward on their north campus. The doctors are great but I don¡¯t think I¡¯m ready to leave just yet.¡±


    I asked ¡°Mind if I come right over, or would you rather I set a time for later?¡±


    Veronica answered ¡°Yeah, come right over. The doctors say I really need some more socializing with trustworthy people to help recover, so they¡¯ll be all for it in all likelihood. See you soon.¡±


    Veronica ended the call then, and I nodded before I set about getting a train back to the Cthonic Mare. The train station was full of people gawking at me, looking like they wanted to ask for an interview. Still, I boarded the train without incident.


    I was still about halfway to my hometown when someone sat next to me and asked ¡°So, what was it like?¡±


    Looking at him a bit quizzically, I asked ¡°You mean the tournament, or getting the platinum egg?¡±


    The anonymous stranger answered ¡°Both, I guess?¡±


    I asked ¡°You¡¯re not a reporter, are you? The last one tried to blackmail an interview out of me.¡± in a suspicious tone of voice.


    They admitted ¡°I actually am a reporter, though I¡¯m ostensibly on break right now and I don¡¯t normally cover sports. Rest assured there¡¯s no blackmail involved.¡±


    After a bit, I sighed. ¡°Honestly everything leading up to finding out we got the platinum was awesome. I met new friends, got to have an absolute blast with bioengineering, and got to share the subject with a whole lot of interested folks at the presentation. Then we got the platinum.¡±


    The reporter asked ¡°Guessing things went downhill about then?¡±


    I answered ¡°Yeah it really did. The award ceremony was bad enough what with the absurd pedestal I feel like I¡¯ve been put on, but the constant scrutiny and attention has been utterly miserable, and it¡¯s barely been a few kiloseconds yet. Strongly considering leaving Bark for elsewhere and coming back when I¡¯ve faded into obscurity.¡±


    We chatted a bit more, me sharing a good deal of my frustrations with the man before the train reached my stop. As I got off, the man said ¡°It¡¯s been nice talking to you, Yures.¡±


    I simply replied ¡°Same.¡± as the door of the train closed and it accelerated off down the track towards its next stop.


    Right, I still had to go visit Veronica at the hospital. I could have taken public transit, but I figured that since I was back in the same arcology as Veronica, I might as well fly under my own power. So as soon as I exited the train station I jumped up into the air, beating down with my wings to gain altitude.


    Soon enough I was flying through the park mesh of Cthonic Mare, dodging between the treetops as I soared through the air towards the north campus of the hospital. It only took a kilosecond or so for me to reach the hospital block in question, gently touching down at the entrance.


    I attracted a few glances, but didn¡¯t get too much extra attention as I walked into the hospital lobby. One of the receptionists on call asked me what I was here for, to which I simply replied ¡°Yures Hann here to visit Veronica Machinae.¡±


    The receptionist nodded as he took a bit to verify that I had indeed been given permission to visit, before he said ¡°She¡¯s in room 2809b on the west wing. You can go to see her now.¡±


    I thanked him, before I made my way to the lift pods for the west wing. From there it was a quick ride up to the twenty-eighth level, the docked paternoster system proving very efficient at getting me to the desired elevation.


    It only took a few moments for the computerized voice to inform me ¡°We have arrived at your desired elevation¡±, the compartment shifting from the lift belt to the docking track and sliding into its unloading position. From there it was a simple walk to Veronica¡¯s room.


    I politely rang the doorbell, informing Veronica ¡°Veronica, it¡¯s me, Yures. May I come in?¡±


    I had to wait a few moments and heard the sound of a toilet flushing before Veronica replied ¡°Sure, come in!¡±


    So I opened the door to Veronica¡¯s room and walked in. Veronica herself was standing in the doorway to greet me, a fragile smile on her face.


    After a moment she said ¡°Yures, it¡¯s been way too long. Please come in and make yourself comfortable.¡±


    I did do, quickly finding a chair as I asked ¡°So, any word on when you could be released?¡±


    Veronica shrugged as she said ¡°Strictly speaking I could go any time, if I really pressed the matter. The doctors took care of the absolute worst damage via cognitive surgery, and I¡¯m in therapy for the rest right now. I¡¯m probably going home today, though there¡¯ll be follow-up appointments every Megasecond or so for quite a while afterwards.¡±


    I nodded in response, noting ¡°Nice to hear that you¡¯ve recovered so well. Er, is it okay if I ask about¡­ well, you know.¡±


    Veronica noted, frowning ¡°Honestly I¡¯d prefer if you didn¡¯t. The doctors say I¡¯m not supposed to dwell on it if at all possible. Anything else you want to talk about?¡±


    I shrugged, ¡°Honestly I¡¯d been hoping you¡¯d provide a topic.¡± before I noticed something hovering up to the window. Wait a moment, that looks like a-


    I groaned in exasperation and hit the control to opaque the window.


    At my sudden response, Veronica asked ¡°What was that all about?¡±


    I groused ¡°News drones. Apparently winning the Platinum Egg and not liking public attention means unscrupulous reporters will stop at nothing to get pictures of me, one guy even tried to blackmail me into an interview.¡±


    Veronica winced in sympathy as she heard my complaint, asking ¡°Have you maybe considered that if you actually agree to a few interviews on your terms they might let up the pressure on you a bit? As it stands all you¡¯re doing by staying out of the public eye like this is piquing their interest even further.¡±


    I blinked, startled. Then I replied ¡°Honestly no, the idea never really occurred to me. Still, I definitely want to make sure it¡¯s well and truly on my terms. Not going to let myself be pressured into anything by some skeezeball.¡±


    Veronica grinned sadly ¡°Yep, let people start walking all over you and they¡¯ll never stop. Learned that one the hard way recently.¡±


    After a brief moment, I asked ¡°So, want to help me figure that out, or would you rather the visit not get sucked up by my issues?¡±


    In response, veronica shrugged and noted ¡°Honestly I¡¯d prefer a board game. Something simple and not too complex, but which isn¡¯t totally luck-based.¡±


    Seeing the opportunity for a joke, I asked ¡°Guess that rules out the roleplaying games then?¡±


    Immediately Veronica cracked up laughing, her raucous sounds of joy echoing around the room for a bit before she replied ¡°Good one, Yures. Really good one. How about something much lighter. Perhaps Scourier?¡±


    Thinking of the simple game about trying to complete as many points-scoring deliveries as you could in a given number of turns, I replied ¡°That sounds wonderful. Got a physical set, or will it be digital?¡±


    Veronica gestured to a shelf with various books and games on it, noting ¡°Yeah the doctors have a decent selection of games available for patients and guests.¡± as one of the nursing drones quickly retrieved a Scourier set from the shelf and started setting it up.


    As I saw the board coming into full form, I grabbed the bag full of player-pawns and asked ¡°Which color do you want to play as, Veronica?¡±


    About six kiloseconds passed as we reconnected over a few rounds of Scourier. I won the first, Veronica won the second, and after the nicer of Veronica¡¯s teammates stopped by, Rat won the third round.


    Still, the visit was winding down, and after a little while I noted ¡°Well, it¡¯s been nice, but I really need to get going now. Wish the tournament could have gone better for all of us.¡±


    Rat and Veronica nodded sadly, even as Veronica noted ¡°I hope you manage to solve your paparazzi problem, Yures.¡±


    As I left the room I replied ¡°I intend to.¡±


    I quickly made my way back down to the lobby. When I got there the receptionist noted ¡°Yures, security has had to escort several pushy reporters out of the building since you arrived. They were looking for you, and there¡¯s every indication that they¡¯re still lurking around outside, waiting to ambush you.¡±


    I sighed, asking ¡°Is there another way I could leave the building then?¡±


    The receptionist replied ¡°You could leave by the roof. Your morph can fly under its own power, which will make catching up to you for an interview rather difficult.¡±


    I nodded appreciatively ¡°Thanks for the tip. I think I¡¯ll be doing just that.¡±


    And so I took the lift all the way up, then took a flight of stairs the rest of the way to the roof. I looked out over the roofed cityscape of Cthonic Mare Arcology for a brief moment as I pondered my predicament. Then I stretched out my wings and dived off into a glide.


    Getting back to the lab only took a few minutes, it wasn¡¯t too far off from my current location. When I arrived, Queen and Wesseck looked absolutely exhausted, already crashed out on the couch together. Having a sneaking suspicion about what happened, I asked ¡°You get mobbed by reporters too?¡±


    Wesseck simply groaned in confirmation as Queen groused ¡°You had the right idea with simply sneaking out the back, Yures. I have no idea how this harassment is even remotely legal.¡±


    I sighed ¡°Yeah I got jumped by an asshole reporter on my way out the back. He tried to blackmail me into giving an interview and got security called on him for his trouble. Been dodging paparazzi all day.¡±


    Wesseck groused ¡°If I didn¡¯t know better I¡¯d say this was professor Thonne punishing us for trying to defy his sabotage, but he doesn¡¯t have those kinds of strings to pull. It¡¯s just shitty shitty sensationalist reporting. I don¡¯t want to get stuck giving paparazzi the runaround for the rest of my life.¡±


    Cautiously, I asked ¡°Curiously did they ever actually let up with the incessant questioning or-¡±


    Queen answered ¡°They only let up when I incinerated one and threatened to torch the rest. Flew Wesseck out of there immediately and claimed self-defense afterwards.¡±


    I winced at the reminder of Queen¡¯s access to a flamethrower. Thoughts whirled through my head as I considered that. We were the most famous people on Bark right now, and apparently that meant the news media would stop at nothing to try and get at us.


    After a little while I asked ¡°So, I guess that means Veronica¡¯s idea of giving a few controlled interviews to make the heat die down is utter nonsense.¡±


    Queen nodded sadly as she replied ¡°Honestly not sure what to do about the whole thing. I can¡¯t go around torching reporters for too much longer; self-defense only goes so far.¡±


    I took that opportunity to mention ¡°I was actually thinking of leaving Bark. We all pack up, go somewhere else where the Platinum Egg isn¡¯t so over-hyped for about a Gigasecond, and maybe think about coming back after the fame dies down. Queen, Wesseck, what do you both think of the idea?¡±


    Wesseck thought for a moment ¡°I personally can¡¯t see any problem with the idea. I¡¯ll want to make sure I can still get in touch with my family after leaving, but dealing with this much media interest is way more than I signed up for. I¡¯ll check the passenger Voidskipper listings for possible destinations.¡±


    Queen agreed ¡°Yes, I don¡¯t think I can stay here on Bark any longer. And I¡¯d much rather go with you two than go alone. Want help coordinating the packing drones?¡±


    I nodded in approval ¡°Yeah my morph closet and spares have the potential to be a pain to move. Any help with that you¡¯d be willing to offer would be greatly appreciated.¡±


    In the end it took us only a few kiloseconds to book three tickets on an inter-system liner to a nice, bustling hab-ladder a couple hundred light years off. We¡¯d be aboard for a few stops, but that was alright.


    We had a little while before we¡¯d need to be at the starport atop the treebark space elevator, but that still wasn¡¯t much time to waste. With the help of the moving drones we were able to quickly get all our stuff to the express train station, and from there is was a quick vertical ride straight up the structure.


    We arrived in the relevant terminal about a kilosecond before the Voidskipper we were supposed to be boarding docked. The passenger capsule in question was already here, and considering that the liner was basically a container ship for passengers, that meant boarding wasn¡¯t even something we¡¯d need to wait for.


    A couple kiloseconds later, all of us were easily aware of the gantries bringing our tube full of people down into the depths of the ship. Inside our cabin, I noted ¡°Well, we¡¯re going to be aboard for the next couple hundred kiloseconds, going by the route information. Any ideas for how to pass the time?¡±


    Queen suggested ¡°If you want to do a little recreational bio-engineering I can show you how to make custom bacteria for culinary purposes?¡±


    Wesseck perked up, ¡°Learning to make yogurt the way you do? That sounds great.¡±

 Forty Megaseconds Hence

    As we sent away our latest happy customer in a freshly made custom morph, I commented to Wesseck ¡°Pretty sure that¡¯s the fifth morph we¡¯ve made for her. I think we have a regular.¡±


    Wesseck replied ¡°Yep, definitely. Still, it¡¯s a good sign that she likes our work enough to come back so many times.¡± as the sign on the shop switched to CLOSED.


    I nodded ¡°Yeah, we¡¯ve settled in a lot better than I feared. We¡¯ve made plenty of friends, got a nice little business running, and we¡¯ve already got a customer base going for it.¡±


    Queen shrugged as we exited to go home for the night, noting ¡°We chose to make a business out of bio-tailoring, which is something we¡¯re good at. Word gets around.¡±


    As we prepared to launch into the air for our flight to the other side of the city, I commented ¡°Anyway, really glad we don¡¯t have to deal with reporters at the very least. The people here barely know Blackwood exists, so when they see our trophy and we say we won it in a bio-engineering tournament they don¡¯t see what the big deal is.¡±


    Queen was carrying Wesseck as we flew of course, the snowy city of Borealis stretching out beneath us as we made our way back home. We had to dodge a few inquisitive flocks of birds on the way, but otherwise we arrived without incident. As we landed I glanced up at the other side of the habitat cylinder six thousand kilometers away, just one of the hundred thousand or so connected in a ring around the local sun.


    Then I stepped through the door into our new home, coming face to face with several of the bio-drones we¡¯d made to perform domestic service tasks around the house.


    I chuckled as I leaned down to pet a few of the more cuddly ones, then wandered to the living room. Then I saw what was waiting for us on the table and my memories of a year ago came rushing back.


    I asked ¡°Brose¡¯s Wyvern roast? Is it for a special occasion?¡±


    Queen nodded, saying ¡°The next Blackwood Invasive Species Tournament is on. I figured we might want to watch it and see what people are up to, so I arranged for us to get it on stream.¡±


    I replied ¡°Huh, neat.¡± as I sat down on the couch. I quickly started looking through the list of competing regions on Blackwood¡­ and was mildly shocked to see that the Thundersnow Steppes had been renamed to Squirrelvania.


    My jaw dropped as I asked ¡°Wait, what. How in the world did our squirrels become so massively successful as to get an entire region renamed!?¡±


    Queen quickly looked it over, and answered ¡°Basically, the only organisms that are still alive are the ones our triad allows to live. They¡¯ve wiped out every predator that dared prey on them, expelled the more dangerous herbivores, and culled all the more problematic plants.¡±


    As I took a look at the utterly disproportionate number of competitors who¡¯d opted to drop organisms into the Thundersnow Steppes (sorry, Squirrelvania), I had a sneaking suspicion that level of success wouldn¡¯t last too much longer.


    Still, there was delicious food available, and I was going to very thoroughly enjoy it. Taking my first bite, the Wyvern roast was just as delicious I remembered from back when I first had it during our time as competitors. After taking a few moments to savor the bite, I swallowed and noticed what was going on with the stream.


    I noted ¡°It¡¯s starting.¡± as I saw what was going on. They were already launching the millions of organism capsules from the launch rings on Bark, all of them on trajectories leading straight to Blackwood. I quickly moved my cursor over all the pods in quick succession, taking in the dizzying variety of organisms that had been submitted for this year¡¯s iteration of the tournament.


    Of course, the tournament was still covering an entire planet so there¡¯d be absolutely no way we could cover every single submission, but that didn¡¯t matter quite so much. Really I only cared about what happened to our squirrels, and despite their best efforts they still hadn¡¯t spread much beyond their initial range.


    So I quickly picked out the list of organisms being deployed to Squirrelvania and asked ¡°So, who wants to place some bets on organisms that live or die?¡±


    Wesseck asked ¡°What stakes are we talking about here? I don¡¯t want it to be for money or forfeit, that just takes all the fun out of it.¡±


    I looked to Queen, who thought for a moment before suggesting ¡°Silly photographs. Lose a bet? The winners get to take one picture of you in whatever silly pose they want.¡±


    I grinned, Wesseck and I both agreeing eagerly to the proposed stakes. What followed was several kiloseconds of hilarious amusement as we all wagered on various organisms living or dying when confronted with artillery squirrels, all of us getting it wrong plenty of times. By the end of things we all had dozens of embarrassing photographs of each other to laugh about later.


    Still, the first day of the tournament wound down eventually, and it was time for us all to go to bed. Wesseck went back to his web where he would recharge in sleep mode, while Queen went to her ornate jewel-encrusted throne of a bed. Personally I had started favoring a simple hammock, my wings providing only a mild obstacle to enjoying the gentle rocking motion it provided.


    Thinking about the next day, I found myself gradually drifting off to sleep. I¡¯d set the toggle for remembering dreams to ¡°OFF¡± tonight, so it wasn¡¯t too surprising that the next thing I was aware of was waking up. Yawning as I got up and out of bed, I quickly swapped to my female morph and wandered downstairs to where I figured Queen and Wesseck were already making breakfast.


    This suspicion was confirmed, as I walked in on an absolutely massive pile of waffles that the kitchen drones were churning out. It took me a moment to think of why, before I noted ¡°Right, we¡¯re having company over today, aren¡¯t we.¡±


    Wesseck confirmed it ¡°Yep. It¡¯s one of our days off. Figured we could invite some friends over to share the fun of the tournament with them. Admittedly the absolute most hectic action is probably over by now, but...¡±


    That¡¯s when Queen noted ¡°Wesseck, during our run as contestants the nukes didn¡¯t go off for several days after initial organism deployment. The starting rush only shows who managed to make something measuring up to the bare minimum standards for Blackwood and who didn¡¯t. You only learn what organisms are awesome after some time to see if they manage to grab a niche.¡±


    I simply plunked myself down at the table as I noted ¡°I mean, the squirrels seem to be doing pretty well for themselves all things considered. Seriously, they wiped out seventy percent of the new arrivals within kiloseconds of deployment.¡± the drones already piling my plate high with syrup-drenched deliciously crispy waffles.


    I quickly sent a request for some fruit too, receiving a few interesting examples of the basic ¡°banana¡± concept that had managed to stick around.


    Still I¡¯d barely started eating, when the door opened revealing Alaur and Grenfal, a couple of the friends we¡¯d managed to make since moving here. I greeted them ¡°Ah, I see that you two are both interested in seeing what we used to do back home?¡±


    Grenfal swished her tails back and forth as she inquired ¡°Some kind of bio-engineering tournament, right? Making a bunch of different critters, parading them around and seeing which ones have the neatest tricks? Pretty sure you three got some sort of trophy for it.¡±


    I chuckled as I replied ¡°Well, tricks is certainly one way to put it. See, no-one actually lives on Blackwood, largely on account of the horrifically lethal biosphere. The entire point of the Blackwood Invasive Species Tournament is to make it even worse by releasing the most hideously dangerous organisms into the wild with no regard for the ecological consequences whatsoever.¡±


    Alaur and Grenfal stood there stock-still for several moments, before Alaur replied ¡°That¡¯s metal as fuck and I love it. I might have to visit Bark sometime and join in the action.¡±


    Queen shrugged as she sat down with her own plate full of waffles and sausages, rivulets of syrup rolling down the stack.


    In the process she remarked ¡°Whatever you do, don¡¯t get the platinum. We got so much publicity that the mob of reporters drove us to flee Bark and end up here.¡±


    I was taking my first bite of waffle as Alaur asked ¡°Yeesh, that bad?¡±


    Off to the side I heard Wesseck answer ¡°Yes, that bad. Queen and I were driven to outright violence just to escape the mobs at the award ceremony.¡±


    I swallowed, remarking ¡°Personally, I¡¯d rather not dwell on that. I want to know how our squirrels are doing, what with all the other organisms people are throwing at them.¡±


    Grenfal chuckled ¡°Guessing you put a lot of work into those squirrels of yours?¡±


    I smiled ¡°Yep. The three of us managed to create a symbiotic organism trio that took over their biome so thoroughly it was renamed to Squirrelvania for this round of the tournament.¡±


    And so we ate our breakfast, the three of us who¡¯d taken part in the tournament eager to show off what we¡¯d managed to create, while our new friends were eager to see it. As it turned out, our squirrels were still holding most of their ground really, really well. Yes they¡¯d lost a few pockets of territory here and there, but all in all there was absolutely no sign of our squirrels vanishing from the face of Blackwood any time soon.Ensure your favorite authors get the support they deserve. Read this novel on the original website.


    The rest of the visit passed smoothly, us enjoying joking around with Alaur and Grenfal as we sat on the couch and chatted about the tournament. Then Wesseck had to mention the embarrassing pictures we took yesterday.


    Alaur of course asked ¡°Ooh, those sound really interesting! Can we please see your crazy pictures?¡±


    I very quietly shouted ¡°No!¡± at the same time as Wesseck replied ¡°Sure thing¡±


    So I sat there with a mortified blush on my face growing brighter and brighter as all my friends started cracking up at the procession of ridiculous pictures we¡¯d taken.


    After a bit Alaur noted ¡°You know, it¡¯s really not fair that we don¡¯t have any embarrassing pictures of us to share like that.¡±


    Queen shrugged ¡°We could take some, if you like?¡±


    Grenfal waved it off with ¡°We can do that at home, but thanks for the offer.¡±


    The rest of the day passed in a bit of a daze from my perspective. Make no mistake the house party was certainly fun, but it was honestly a bit much for me. Still, I was really happy to be sharing the source of our passion for bioengineering with them. Eventually the duo went home, and we started winding down for the night.


    Our dinner was a delicious stir-fried noodle dish, which we joyfully devoured without much fuss. Afterwards was a quick cooperative board game that we ultimately lost on account of setting it to the maximum difficulty, and now it was time to get to bed.


    We all went to our respective sleeping devices after a quick set of good-night hugs. As I was settling into my hammock, I mused that tomorrow would be a work day, and it would be neat getting to do more custom bio-engineering work. And on that merry note I set the dream remembrance toggle to ¡°ON¡± before I drifted to sleep.


    As I slept I found myself dreaming about our squirrels and their struggle, though it seemed to have gotten conflated with some historical drama about various revolutions. After all, we¡¯d never programmed the artillery squirrels to wave battle flags emblazoned with a boomnut bush and quills, we hadn¡¯t added anything like the ornate military uniforms they ended up dressed with in the dream, and they definitely hadn¡¯t had a catchy military marching theme as an anthem.


    Unsurprisingly I woke up laughing. Yeah that dream had been quite gory and gruesome as anything to do with Blackwood was, but the sheer enthusiasm of the dream-squirrels had been utterly hilarious. I was still laughing as I swapped to my male morph, then started making my way downstairs to breakfast.


    When I arrived, Wesseck looked at me and asked ¡°Something we¡¯d find funny too?¡± from their bowl of porridge.


    I of course explained about the distinctly squirrely dream I¡¯d had, resulting in Wesseck chuckling a bit and Queen remarking ¡°Yeah, that actually is pretty funny.¡±


    I simply replied ¡°I know; that¡¯s why I¡¯ve been laughing about it all morning.¡± as I started digging into my porridge, the salted butter proving a very enjoyable flavor for it.


    After a little while we finished eating, and I noted ¡°Guess we¡¯ve got to get ready for work now.¡±


    Queen smiled as she said ¡°Yep. Ready to go?¡±


    I simply answered ¡°Absolutely.¡± as I got up and fetched my work bag to bring in. A few minutes later we left the house we¡¯d gotten from the standard living guarantee on arrival, taking to the air as we flew through the skies of the habitat drum to reach our place of business.


    There weren¡¯t all that many obstacles in the way, and by now we were quite familiar with the commute. So we arrived fairly uneventfully. I couldn¡¯t help but glance up at the animated sign reading ¡°Snow Coast Bio-Tailoring¡± as we entered, our old team name having been recycled for usage as the name of our business.


    Wesseck and I quickly spun up second instances of ourselves for desk duty, before heading back into the laboratory area. We still had most of our bio-engineering equipment from back on Bark, but augmented with a few additional pieces of gear we hadn¡¯t possessed before to make our job a bit more streamlined and increase production capacity.


    As we arrived, I quickly noted ¡°So we¡¯ve got a customer¡¯s back order on some decorative houseplants with fruiting capabilities. Also Adam wants that new feline morph template. I can do some work on the template while you handle the houseplants?¡±


    Wesseck replied ¡°Sure. Fits our areas of specialty too; you were always more interested in animals while I lean towards the botanical side.¡±


    Queen just smiled as she noted ¡°By the way, I spotted a couple articles about new strains of nanoweapon around. Nothing my previous-model immune systems couldn¡¯t handle, but I¡¯ve made some updates to account for them anyway. Our customers count on our products being immunologically top-of-the-line after all.¡±


    I replied ¡°Thanks for the tip, Queen. I¡¯ll probably ask for some help integrating it into the morph template I¡¯m working on, but you¡¯ve been doing a great job.¡±


    Queen simply replied ¡°You¡¯re welcome¡± as I well and truly got to work.


    Perhaps unsurprisingly, Wesseck finished his job first; plants were usually significantly simpler than mobile systems after all. He¡¯d printed out a bag full of seeds for the customer to plant along with some fairly straightforward care instructions, noting ¡°These should do the job. The fruiting spectrumate is now fully functional. Now to call the customer and inform them that their order is ready for pickup.¡±


    The me who was at the front desk replied ¡°Will do.¡± and immediately fired off a message to the customer who¡¯d ordered the decorative plants in the first place.


    Sure enough, a kilosecond or so later a drone came by to pick up the seeds, flying off with them without any significant incident. Afterwards I noticed that Wesseck had printed out a couple seeds beyond what was ordered and I asked ¡°Guessing those are for us to use at home?¡±


    Wesseck replied ¡°One of them. I figure we can put the other on display in the store window, use it as an advertisement.¡±


    I shrugged as I said ¡°Fair enough.¡±


    A little while later it was lunch break, with a set of roasted cheese sandwiches and pickles for me. I swapped places with my desk instance so both of me would get some lab time in today, then settled in for a shift greeting customers. I didn¡¯t have too long to wait, since barely a few kiloseconds later someone in a bland mass-produced synthmorph came in through the front door, looking very disconcerted.


    They quickly introduced themselves ¡°Er, hello? I¡¯m Viot Reggus. I¡¯m only a few kiloseconds old and I¡¯m hoping I can get a morph?¡±


    I nodded to Viot, and asked ¡°Are you willing to use a standardized template, or do you want a custom job? We can do cosmetic work on a template in a few kiloseconds and for only a few hundred Chava, but a fully custom piece will run you up to twelve thousand and take up to a Megasecond.¡±


    Viot replied sadly ¡°I¡­ I only have a thousand. I was kicked out of my brain of origin right after forming and I¡¯ve only got the basic living guarantee and no skills of my own.¡±


    I nodded sadly as I noted ¡°Right, that means we¡¯ll have to work off a template. Animalized near-baselines are a decent choice that¡¯s hard to go wrong with, but they¡¯re not the only option.¡±


    Viot thought for a moment ¡°Are there any templates with extra arms? I think it would be useful.¡±


    I quickly brought up the list of templates with arms beyond the baseline two, including those that made use of tentacles or prehensile tails to achieve similar effects.


    After a little while, Viot settled on a set of four prehensile tails in addition to two proper arms.


    I asked ¡°So, we¡¯ve settled on a template. Any requests for cosmetic theming?¡±


    Immediately Viot answered ¡°Bird. Colorful feathers. Doesn¡¯t need wings, but definitely bird.¡±


    I nodded at the request, since it definitely wasn¡¯t the strangest one we¡¯d gotten. I quickly sent it off to my counterpart in the lab for functionalization and printing, reading the spreadsheet and noting ¡°That particular morph would normally cost about two hundred Chava. That said, if you¡¯ll just fill out some paperwork you might be eligible to have it publicly funded under the basic living guarantee.¡±


    Viot looked at me somewhat incredulously before asking ¡°Wait, really?¡±


    I nodded in confirmation ¡°Yes, really. You¡¯re obviously wearing what we in the business call a liability morph; it¡¯s the sort of morph you give to someone if all you care about is evicting them from the same mind as you, without much care for the evictee¡¯s comfort. The basic living guarantee includes a guarantee of a morph that the citizen would find comfortable to live in, so if you fill out these forms you can probably get it for no cost to you.¡±


    Viot startled slightly as I handed them a tablet with the relevant forms already called up on it, and directed them to fill it out. They quickly sat down in one of the chairs we had in the lobby and started filling out the paperwork, when all of a sudden someone else stormed in and she was mad.


    Considering the brownish goop slathered all over her blue skin and the multiple gashes in her clothing it wasn¡¯t too hard to see why she was so upset. Still, when she marched up to Wesseck and demanded ¡°This morph, clean it now.¡± I was left kind of speechless.


    Apparently the only think Wesseck could think of to say was ¡°You are aware we don¡¯t offer cleaning serv-¡±


    The woman replied ¡°I. Don¡¯t. Care. You have to have a shower or something in back there, I¡¯m covered in disgusting filth, my clothes are ruined, and I just want to feel clean again.¡±


    Wesseck and I shared a glance, and a covert tight-beam radio conversation.


    I asked ¡°Are we really going to let this woman just march in here and demand a shower? Our cleaning suite isn¡¯t designed for that volume of refuse.¡±


    To this, Wesseck answered ¡°Well we can¡¯t just leave her out there stinking up the lobb- wait a moment, she¡¯s collapsed.¡±


    I had already called for janitor drones to clean the lobby, even as I checked over the suddenly inert morph. After a moment I noted ¡°Entitled jerk. She ditched the morph the instant it was in our lobby to try and force us to clean it. Doesn¡¯t seem to have bothered hiding her connection though.¡±


    Wesseck sighed, noting ¡°The police are already on their way to collect it. She¡¯ll be out of our hands in a few moments.¡±


    Sure enough the inert morph was carted away in fairly short order. Viot turned out to qualify for a free morph, and left a happy customer only a little while after it was printed.


    The rest of the day passed relatively uneventfully; we got a few more customers for our various services, none nearly as insane as that crazy entitled lady. Then I re-merged with other me, Wesseck did the same, and we all flew home.


    When we arrived, I quickly turned on the media station to check how the Blackwood Invasive Species Tournament was going, and when I discovered that the artillery squirrels were still going strong I did a little happy dance. Wesseck inquired about it, and when I pointed out that our submission was still doing well enough to earn a Gold Egg if it had been this year, he joined in the celebration too.


    As for Queen, she¡¯d apparently had the bio-drones make Wyvern Roast again, the small servant organisms bringing a platter of food out to the entertainment area so we could eat and watch.


    Looking at the display and who was doing the best, I mused ¡°So, it¡¯s been about a year since we left Bark, going by most customary calendars.¡±


    Queen thought about it for a bit, then replied ¡°Yes, it has. We¡¯ve met a lot of interesting people here, and really started getting settled in. Don¡¯t tell Grenfal, but they¡¯re so cute together with Alaur.¡±


    I smiled at the humor, but there was something bugging me that I didn¡¯t think Queen had quite noticed. I just sat there in thought for several minutes after that, before Wesseck raised the point I hadn¡¯t quite been able to articulate.


    ¡°In a Gigasecond, when the publicity¡¯s died down and we won¡¯t be mobbed by reporters will we even want to go back? None of us are even a Gigasecond old yet, so by the time that moment rolls around we¡¯ll have spent more than half our lives here.¡±


    I mulled it over for a bit, before answering ¡°We have no way to know that, consciousness is just about the opposite of predictable over that sort of timescale. There¡¯s all sorts of quantum randomness bubbling up to the macro-scale to affect things, even aside from the whole issue with being incredibly complex chaotic systems. We¡¯ll figure it out when the time comes.¡±


    Wesseck seemed to accept that answer, though Queen seemed a bit saddened by the frank discussion.


    After a moment, she noted ¡°Well, regardless of what happens a Gigasecond from today I¡¯m really glad we¡¯re all together now. Anyway, I do hope that this year¡¯s Platinum winner doesn¡¯t get quite so badly mobbed as we did.¡±


    With a distinctly nonplussed look, I noted ¡°Queen, the media back on Bark literally broke several laws in pursuit of their scoops. Unless there¡¯s been some sort of mass crackdown and subsequent reform program they¡¯ll be just as awful this year.¡±


    Wesseck looked between the two of us for a moment as if trying to figure out whether to take a side. Then they said ¡°Look, can we please not spend too much effort on this until later? I want to actually enjoy the game.¡±


    ¡°Yeah, let¡¯s just put that aside for later.¡±