《Beware the Horde [Isekai LitRPG]》 1. The Mass Murder of Slimes
{Welcome to Beware the Horde}
Those words became etched into Hajimes mind upon rebirth into a nameless world. How fickle life mustve been to perish in a gas explosion at his apartmentmoments before he could enjoy his favorite MMA program. If the landlord were here, theyd lose more than their molars. In this nameless world was a field devoid of any creature to talk about. There was nothing but blades of grass that stretched into every horizon, plus the occasional boulder that stuck like a sore thumb. Silence was his only company at the moment. Hajime kicked a few rocks here and there, whistling a tune to pass the time, and still, nothing. Pretty much nothing. That was until he decided to kick a rock into one of the unassuming boulders. Just as he moved away into another spot, a faint voice beckoned, Psst over here. At long last, there were signs of intelligent life. It was another man, donning a wolfs head like a winter cap. Hajime advanced cautiously, hoping the stranger would explain everything like a post-apocalyptic movie. He was told to sit beneath the boulder with him, quiet as a church mouse while offering him a space. First time, huh? whispered the stranger, appearing no older than his 25-year-old self except for his snow-white hair. His piercing silver eyes also didnt help much. I dont know. You tell me. Hajime couldnt care less about lowering his tone lest there was a fart in the wind. quiet. Theyre coming. He raised an eyebrow, his mind creating a few scenarios over what that meant. Perhaps he was reincarnated into a world of ravenous zombies or mindless orcs. But that didnt explain how the stranger didnt carry as much as a sword, dagger, or RPG. Would it hurt to explain whats going on? he asked. Oh, I dont have to. See for yourself. The stranger pointed toward the field. It wasnt long until a pale substance reminiscent of jelly emerged beneath the grass. In mere seconds, many more appeared at different locations. Hajime chuckled, trying to comprehend the absurdity he had to face. Slimes? Thats what youre afraid of? Now! Failing to answer his question, the stranger charged at the first slime nearby. He couldnt believe it at the start, but a mere single one of these bastards took about five hits to die. Granted, if he had anything other than his fists like the stranger, maybe they could mow them down in seconds. A submachine gun would be nice. The only attack the slimes did was what Hajime would describe as a half-assed jump as twelve more began pursuing him. No matter where he stood, they knew where to spring out of the ground next. If there was anything he could be thankful for now, it was his undying passion for mixed martial arts. It didnt matter what situation you were in. Versatility was key; he had to adapt no matter how weak they were. Are we gonna do this all day!? he said, shining a pearly white grin as he prepared to deliver a roundhouse kick. One, two, and smack, it proved to be quite fun whenever they burst into a million pieces. Yes, just keep killing more until you get an upgrade. The wolf-capped stranger had his own level of expertise against the gooey bastards. He grabbed one of them from behind and hurled them into the others. As Hajime put it, he went slime bowling. Wow, I never thought of that. Hajime was eager to copy the ingenious move, only with his own spin. Instead of slime bowling, he went slime boxing, wearing two of them as surprisingly effective gloves. I like your ideas, furry man! he said in the middle of the battle. Thanks. The names Farkas, by the way. Hajime. Nice to meet you. Now, tell me all about this so-called upgrade you mentioned. I told you, I dont have to. Were almost at our 50th kill. Indeed, they were, as he realized when his slime gloves reached their limit and perished like melted ice cream. Anyone well-versed in light novel stories would know anything about transparent screens appearing before the hero as they progressed through the game. His, however, was all too unique.
Choose an Upgrade
Way of the Sword The deadly elegance of ancient combat. Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings. +50 ATK, -15 DEF, +18 SPD. Gain super skill [Slashing Fury], 3-second cooldown
Way of the Shield The immense fortitude of ancient defense. -40 ATK, +80 DEF, -45 SPD. Gain super skill [Human Iron], 8-second cooldown
Way of the Thunder The overwhelming power of ancient godhood. +100 ATK, -100 DEF, +100 SPD. Gain super skill [Zeus Railgun], 6-second cooldown
Hajime had his heart racing faster than if he was in a marathon. To think being at merely level 1 in this world felt like he had already finished a quarter of a heros journey. By that moment, he fell in love with the word fun. Obviously, he had to pick the last option. There was no point in worrying about piss-poor defense when you could blitz through an army of monsters from land and sky. He couldnt be any happier about becoming a human bug zapper. Woohoo! Yeah, baby! Thats what Im talking about! Speeding across the field, Hajime cackled like a birthday kid on Christmas. With a single punch and kick, he tore through numerous slimes moments before they began to number in the thousands. And when those numbers dwindled, they became tens of thousandsso much more, yet so much fun. Luckily, after another 50th kill, a second screen appeared.
Choose an Upgrade
Polished Blade Inflicts bleed status of 10% of current damage
Dryad Armor Heals 20% of health after 30 kills
Tesla Aura Damages all enemies within 50 square tiles
You can choose either of them! Farkas interjected, killing a dozen slimes in a single swing. Mix and match whatever fits your style! Hajime knew all too well about versatility, as he had shown before gaining the might of nature in its cruelest form. His favorite Russian MMA star wouldve had more to say about it. But something popped into his mind, all in the name of fun. Nah, I want more lightning. And so, there it was, a new play style that didnt require much mental effort. Besides dodging some enemies that got too close, anything twenty feet away from him became charred to a crisp. Still, the gooey bastards were relentless. Some even began leaping above his head when he least expected it. The slimes did everything to try and kill him in one or two hits. The thought of what might happen if he died a second time was indeed quite terrifying. But rest assured, fun was on his side. His grin had yet to fade, and his laughter had yet to cease. Every horizon in the field was now flooded with the sea of millions ready to end his life. By then, every screen displayed the same upgrade options, only even better than the last. [Way of the Thunder] evolved into dealing 5000 damage with one finger poke, while [Tesla Aura] could now rain lightning bolts as far as a football field. Hey, Farkas, wanna see me run across the world seven times a second? Wanna see me do it again? Hajime was thankful he didnt swallow bugs throughout his literal blink-on-an-eye demonstration. He expected a convoluted cheat skill as a reborn hero, not a Golden Age comic superpower, which was more fitting for the word fun anyway. Yeah, sort of, Farkas replied, clearing the dirt and debris off his leather jacket. A bit too fast for my senses, but good on you, dude. Itll help you against the next wave. We better get ready. Next wave, you say? How lovely! These boys are just getting started, he cracked his knuckles while walking past him, still shining the same grin. Before long, another screen appeared in front of them.
Boss Battle
Queen Gelaitna of the Endless Hunger
HP 80,000,000
ATK 10,000
DEF 3,000
SPD 15
Finally, with an actual challenge to satisfy his fists, it was only a matter of time before something in the field could withstand a lightning jab. Then again, seeing this towering behemoth move at two miles an hour gave him a sense of respect for the matriarch. And by that, he meant standing still while her subjects failed to close the gap between him and his domain of instant electrocution. Oh, no, woe is me! Hajime taunted with a shrug. Please dont summon more of your minions. Think of the funeral bills! Farkas cried, Dude, what the hell are you doing!? Run away! Huh? What did you Some would say the reborn hero was so drunk on his godlike strength that he had forgotten even a cat scratch would decimate his entire build. In this case, Queen Gelatinas [Constellation Beam] erased every semblance of his being in less than a microsecond. How fickle his second life mustve been to lose his favorite Hawaiian shirt again. Farkas sighed, eyes closed as he pulled his sword from the matriarchs disintegrating head. Man, why do these guys never learn?
Far behind the scenes, several watchful gazes had observed the battle in a birds eye view. Some turned in disgust, while others in disappointment. Curses! Hes just like the others. Too young and too stupid. Perhaps he is, but he has one thing going for him that they lacked: eternal madness. Hes perfect. But Your Majesty, if this continues, well lose another hero forever against You-Know-What. And Im willing to sacrifice an infinite amount of them in the future. Assign Farkas and Paulie as his teammates. This young master must know the right path to face the horde. as you wish. 2. A World Above the Clouds It was the break of dawn. Hajime had a good sleep for once. He was ready to get out of bed, eat a bowl of hearty rice topped with omelets, and watch whatever poor sap was against the peerless championKhabib Nurmagomedov. For the next twenty minutes, he was on a date with his sandbag while hearing the crowd on TV go wild over his idol. One, two, three, one, two, three; the trance of an imaginary battle was intoxicating. The veins in his muscles tensed to their limit, reaching across his neck before the final blow. As expected, it was a total knockout. And he has done it again, ladies and gentlemen! said the announcer with a heavy Bristol accent. The crowning youth of our time has given us another spectacle in the books! Anderson Silva has yet to recover. All praise for our beloved Hajime! Hajime stopped in the middle of his daily intake of liquid protein, his eyes fixed on his walled flatscreen. He heard stories of mild delirium in the heat of exercise, but as the moments passed, the crowd began to cry out his name. The bewilderment of it all made him pour his drink into the sink without a second thought. Goddamn expired eggs. Speak for yourself, Hajime, said the announcer in a wispy tone. You had everything going for you that day, but it all went tits up! Your second life expired too fast before your eyes. What the fuck? He squinted at the screen, pacing himself a little closer. By then, he didnt utter a word as the crowd grew louder and louder, repeating his name like a broken record. It was pure chaos in the face of a proud man. But dont worry, Hajime. Well always love you. Your greatest spectacle has yet to come! The announcer disappeared into the crowd, overtaking the screen with their never-ending smiles. Hajime! Hajime! Hajime! Hajime! Hajime! Haji Hajime! said Farkas. Wake up, its time for breakfast. Ill get some condiments. Be right back. It was a nightmare to remember, as Hajime begrudgingly agreed. The moment his second life was gone due to hubris, it didnt even cover all the worlds greatest fears, much less in the new one, where he waited in a room not too far from the average penthouse. Knock, knock. Howdy-do, Sleeping Betty!? Farkas entered the room, bowing like a butler of an esteemed household. Putting his wolf cap back on, he walked toward a coffee machine at his own pace, asking the built-in Alexis to turn the thermostat up a notch. Farkas had already left quite the impression since midnight. Hajime supposed one could get used to this life of watching over a dreary roommate 24/7, free from the worries of facing the horde. However, he was dumbfounded at how Farkas remained barefoot with all the dirt tucked under his toenails. For sure, there had to be a health code around here. Is this your way of keeping in touch with your spirit animal? he said. Farkas nearly choked on his espresso like the giggling chum he was, laying his mug on the table. No, of course not! Its a mandatory custom of my people. We Lupinians dont have the luxury of slow-growing nails like your primate kind. My kind? Im not from Earth, Hajime. Not many of us here are, except for Aaron in the tabloid section. Barring him, youre the most recent human from that planet in years. Really? What happened to the others? Dead. Hajime had eyebrows raised for a few moments, his mind betraying him as it replayed the one scene he would describe as the personification of the word embarrassing. Not even the word fun could escape its filthy clutches. Dead? But how? Im here, arent I? Its complicated, but for the other cases, lets just say you still get to see yourself growing wrinkles after a few more decades. Some are worse than dead. One is out there going He caressed his chin, thrust into stories of cruel and unusual suffering due to the horde. One had half their brain removed; another went crawling on all fours. One even got trapped in a never-ending cycle of the memory of fighting the slime matriarch herself. It was cold inside, yet it stung constantly worse than the last. It stung until every bone and tooth became her daily nutrition. But hey, its not all doom and gloom here, Farkas emphasized. The top dogs tend to be reborn heroes, not me included. Such a shame none of them were impressed by your show of vanity yesterday. Yeah, yeah, I get it. Hajime stood tall from the table, stretching his arms wide as he yawned like a rooster on sedatives. So any chance for a brief tour of this place before we do what we gotta do? The narrative has been taken without authorization; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident. Ready when you are, dude. Weve still got all day.
Hajime didnt know what to expect from the otherworld by that point. It seemed like he had never left home, with all his surroundings being a typical strip mall. One striking difference, however, was the overabundance of nature. There were trees, shrubs, everything. Even beneath his feet, the concrete floor had noticeable moss. Usually, such a scenario would dictate a place abandoned for a century, but it was never like that. It was vibrant, leaves glistening with morning dew and colorful mushrooms on logs. As they took a surprisingly smooth ride on an escalator teeming with vines, something became clear: their inside was also outside. It sure explained the hanging flower pots in their apartment. Unique feeling, isnt it? said Farkas, hands resting at the back of his head. I heard all humans used to live similar lives among the forests and grasslands. It makes me nostalgic for my home, honestly. Yeah, maybe ten thousand years ago. We primates dont have the luxury of razor-sharp fangs like your Lupinian kind. Farkas laughed, bearing fangs the size of toothpicks. You know, I think you and I will get along just fine. Paulie, too, is a great guy to be around. Wait until you see the sheer might of his [Way of the Ax]! Interesting, said Hajime, stashing his hands inside his pockets as they stopped at a taco stand. Maybe I shouldve used that back Wait, what did you say? Paulies a great guy. He cant fit in most saunas, but weve been best buds for three months. No, not that. What do you mean your friend has the [Way of the Ax]? He gave him a slight squint. Since his first taste of the horde, he wondered if there were more than three upgrade options on the field. If it were up to him, there would be the option to kill countless enemies with a swordfish. There wasnt much reason to imagine such a thing other than the heck of it. Oh, I see, Farkas responded. Sorry, dude, but thats a hereditary thing. Huh? Dont worry, youll know during our training. Experience is the best teacher, as they say. Lets continue the tour, shall we? Farkas walked toward a ticket booth, asking for two seats. It was a rather mesmerizing scene to behold if Hajime had anything to say about it. His eyes were fixed on a wide open ledge that stretched half a mile across, lined with a thousand cable cars packed with people ever-so-unknown to his human traits. Some were more like sapient cuttlefish than others. His kind was present, too, but he doubted if they knew about baseball or any other mundanity back home. All right, lets go! said Farkas, leading the way. Welcome to Agrima! As always, he shined a pearly white grin. He wanted every opportunity to see all the customs of an otherworldly populace, but as he stepped into the cable car, his expectations were already out the window. Amidst the blue sky and yellow sun was a sea of clouds beneath the metropolis. Indeed, if he could describe it with the least words, it would be this: a world above the clouds. People got around the same way they did, though some preferred carrying their [Insta-Warp] card for the quickest destination possible. A brief moment of dread haunted Hajimes mind as a couple took their child to learn for themselves. Losing a limb or two in between travel wasnt out of the question. Others got around blessed by their natural-born abilities, from flapping their wings to moving their tail fins to even the occasional wall crawling. Seeing the cuttlefish folks play pranks on their family members disguised as tree bark was memorable, too. They may not have hands or feet, but even they knew about the word fun. Hajime was delighted to show Farkas such hilarity, but his friends face was more accurate with the word sour. Hey, man, you okay? he said, resting his hand on his shoulder. What? Oh, sorry, I was spacing out. Farkas continued gazing down at whatever street they passed from high above. It wasnt clear whether he looked at any citizen walking by or the skyscrapers overgrown with vegetation. Perhaps Farkas was spaced out, but Hajime had none of it. Yeah, if you say that again while looking like that, I might just accidentally open the door. Im not afraid of that one bit, chuckled Farkas, giving him the faintest smile before sighing in defeat. Okay, you got me. Im jealous, jealous of everyone down there enjoying themselves. You see, Lupinians are a highly social race. Leaving the nest doesnt exist in our vocabulary. Oh, God. Oh, God, Im so sorry. I didnt mean to Farkas chuckled again, eyes closed. No, no, dont be. We werent wiped out or anything. My planet still thrives as we speak. So whats this all about? Well they just didnt want me anymore. Farkas smile disappeared, his eyes showing a thousand stories of isolation and grief. After mustering the strength to take a deep breath, he uttered, Hajime, do you know why people want to face the horde? To defeat cool-ass monsters? Make ends meet? Protect those who cant fight for themselves? Yes, yes, and yes, but at least for me, its so I can make a difference with the people around me. Then, I realized how foolish I was to think I could make everyone happy. Lupinians are very strong, very proud, yet very stubborn. They paid no welcome to Paulie and the others. Frankly, it was a harrowing tale fit for a violin, and frankly, Hajime couldnt relate much. If he were in his shoes, they could all kiss his rock-hard behind goodbye before leaving for good. But maybe he couldve been there for him. He couldve taught him about the supposed spiritual benefits of owning a Super Saiyan poster while doing push-ups. Maybe, just maybe. He began tapping his fingers with arms crossed, humming as his mind searched for any way to lighten the mood. Usually, there was nothing a good arm wrestling couldnt fix except perhaps a dislocated socket. He clung to the same idea, sluggishly moving his hand until it became a mere handshake. Thanks. The names Hajime, by the way. Confusing as it was, that may have been the point. After all, heroes needed companions along the way, and against the horde, they would be invincible. Farkas. Nice to meet you. 3. The Bearded Teacher A bit more window shopping had never hurt anybody. It wasnt all in vain, as Hajime used his [Insta-Warp] card for the first time, learning not to freak out like a chicken on cocaine mid-transmission. The crowd sure had a story to tell for their peers. To think their beloved Farkas was even there to put up with such a grown man. Relax, take a deep breath. Farkas rubbed his shoulders in comfort. Any more of this hysteria, and theyd probably have to try tomorrow instead, lest they miss their training program coming an hour away. Relax? he said, sweating bullets across his face. I could see my head exploding in the dead of space at any moment, bruh! Thats gonna happen. Even if you see yourself deep in the planets core, your card wont do shit. Just think of your most desired destination, and youre good. Gaining a fair amount of confidence, Hajime straightened his back and closed his eyes in preparation. He held his card tightly as he envisioned the one place they hadnt visited in Agrima yet: a local steakhouse. How far he would end up didnt matter as long as it didnt result in instant decapitation or other cruel mishaps. Focusing was key. A bright, yellowish aura began to glow from his feet, traveling around him with numerous particles dissipating left and right. In less time than a houseflys wingbeat, he disappeared in a cloud of even more pixie dust, as the citizens called it. He opened his eyes again, and sure enough, it was the aroma of sweet, savory beef cooked to perfection. Farkas followed suit, twirling his card like a basketball. Im impressed. Youre getting the hang of how things work here quite fast. Just dont overthink things next time. Thanks, cackled Hajime. The steakhouse proved far more spacious than he imagined, enough to have a fancy live band in the corner. Although they played some form of jazz, it sure wasnt Kenny G and more like a jam session straight out of New Orleans. As such, he ordered a table where he could relish the fun melody not too far or too near. By the way, how did you know where I was going? he asked Farkas. Well, its because Okay, you know what, screw that dumbass question, he interjected, slumping on his chair. You probably just know this city like the back of your hand, but something has been burning inside my mind since that day. You might have a clue what it is already. What would that be? Why in the ever-loving Christ am I still walking on two legs after all that? Farkas indulged in a mouthful of ribs before answering the question, stuffing his cheeks to their limit before a hefty gulp. Its simpler than you think, really. I dont know why myself, but no one truly dies when facing the horde. You will, however, die in any other circumstance. Circumstances being? Oh, you know, car crashes, falling off ledges, playing hero during a bank robbery, all the horrific stuff. Or at least thats how it is for the average Joe walking by us. Yeah, I noticed that while you were away for ketchup. Does this shit look average to you? Hajime tensed his fingers, aiming to stab his plate with a butterknife. The blunt tip tore through his steak like floral foam before eventually shattering the plate into a million pieces. The result was good silverware firmly stuck two-thirds into the mahogany wood. I guess weve got superpowers now, huh? he said, never noticing the angered staff behind him. Despite witnessing the most unorthodox behavior in a single day, Farkas brayed like a hyena watching a game show. Yes, youre right, but youll have to find that out later. Im afraid its time for our training. Oh, what? We havent even tried the chili fries! Youll pay for everything, though, right? Sorry, dude, but rules are rules. All players are obliged to grow stronger every day, you know? Farkas shrugged. Also, yeah, Ill pay for everything. Dont worry.
Hajime prepared himself again with his card at hand. The only thing he had to think about for their next destination was two words: training program. Like the steakhouse, he didnt know where he would end up, but with someone like Farkas on his side, he was eager to meet the others. Hopefully, this certain Paulie was indeed a great guy to be around. So, you ready? said Farkas, standing behind him. Im ready when you are, dude. He had a bit of fun echoing his words. Hed probably do it again if they finished training quicker than the rest of the P.L.A.Y. division awaiting them, a name that was admittedly too on the nose for his taste. One might wonder what contrived words they used for such an acronym. If you stumble upon this tale on Amazon, it''s taken without the author''s consent. Report it. For the second time, the pixie dust led Hajime to a location he had never stepped foot on, or at least that was his expectation. Indeed, he didnt know much about the training program, but at first glance, he immediately recognized where they stood. His eyes didnt get deceived. It was the same open field where his shameful demise took place. Oh, shit, not again! Hajime clenched his fists, more than ready and careful not to underestimate the gooey bastards surrounding them under any perceived notion. Taking no chances, he lunged at the nearest slime in sight. That was until it met a different end before he could even land a hit. As the slime tried to jump as a counterattack, it caught itself between an invisible wall, frying its whole body like magma until it was a pile of ash on the ground just a foot away from him. For the first time, and maybe the only time, Hajime had his jaws dropping for such a vicious species. Id advise you not to get close to the barriers edge, echoed a voice in the distance. Its a powerful skill created by one of our best of the best. As your proud mentor, I welcome you, Mr. Hajime. Disappoint me or not, youll always be a player in my eyes.- He turned around, noticing Farkas being too ecstatic to introduce him to their titan of an instructor. No other word wouldve described the man he gazed at for a few moments that day any better. His shoulders were broader than a fire exit, and he towered more than the tallest lampposts. Additionally, his full red beard would put any lion to shame. Im Paulie, pleased to make your acquaintance, Mr. Hajime. Farkas has told me a lot about you on the phone. Well, the pleasures all mine, said Hajime, scratching his head as he walked closer. Sorry if this sounds rude, but its just that Ive never seen Wait, you guys have phones? Of course! Its mandatory for the game were in. Paulie let out a hearty laugh, resting an ax of appropriate size on his shoulder. Just hold up your hand like youre holding a real one right now. He did as he was told in a heartbeat, curious about what spin the otherworld had on such complicated technology. Thankfully, it exceeded what he could think of in a lifetime. He witnessed the same pixie dust appear on his hand, slowly manifesting into a display screen, a few side buttons, and finally, a metal casing. A navy blue color scheme wouldve been perfect, but gold wasnt too bad. His new phone had everything, to say the least, down to the always familiar icons for music and web browsing. The most striking difference was an application that resembled a typical fantasy mobile game, showing all kinds of monsters. Without a doubt, it was a game within a game aptly named
{Welcome to Beware the Horde}
3 Blessings Unlocked
Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger Defeat your first wave. Gain the ability to choose an upgrade at the start of the game
Who Is Your Favorite Fearless Hero? Kill 20 monsters in a single attack. Gain a total of 9 automatic revives
Witness Me! Survive your first boss for one minute. Every hit from the enemy counts as a kill
Hajime had amazement written all over him. The games idea of progression seemed too good to be true, too overpowered, even if a trillion enemies would flood the field at any moment. But as always, the pop culture references were tacky at best. Man, I wish they picked movie quotes from other planets instead. Youre not missing out much, said Farkas. We Lupinians, for example, lean more on patriotic biopics than any other genre. Paulie cleared his throat, calling everyones attention near the center. He began by spinning his ax up and downround and roundand up and down again. It was quite the show for a man his size, appearing more like a ribbon dance of the highest elegance before it finally landed back on his shoulder. Good day, everyone! My name is Paulie Phoebus, and Ill be your teacher for today. Please, call me Paul if you must. Hi, Paul! said all the players in unison. All right. Before we begin, Id like to say a few things in my mind. One, I love a good leg of salted pork. Two, anything with too much sugar is a no for me. And three, we can all agree that if Mr. Hajime didnt have his head up his rectum, he wouldve won no sweat. Any questions? The P.L.A.Y. trainees exchanged glances at each other until the air filled with the mixed sound of laughter and agreement. Never before had they seen a prime example of a gifted man flying too close to the sun, only it was a surprise attack from the weakest boss. If Hajime were in his puberty years, several veins would pop on his forehead in retaliation, and not in a comedic manner. Fortunately, being not a fan of hospital bills for an aneurysm, he reveled in his own folly the loudest, shocking all for the rest of their days. Paul, do me a favor. Oh, s-sure, what is it? make me a better killing machine. There it was: the maniacal, pearly white grin foretold to Paulie beforehand. Not an ounce of Hajimes self-esteem got crushed to oblivion. If anything, it had doubled, yet he couldnt help but return the favor with his own excitement. You bet your sweet ass I will! 4. Learning His Way Hajime waited for any cue from Paulie, dying to learn the secrets to face the horde properly. A mere speech about humility and wisdom would be disappointing, but their instructor began with a peculiar action. Paulie had spun his ax once more like a cane, pacing back and forth in a rhythmic pattern. His colleagues didnt seem to question this at any moment, either. They just stood there. Okay, this is awkward. Walking away, he noticed a pebble on the ground. A bit of hacky-sack to pass the time wouldnt hurt, and he scored a decent 12 in one go. However, as he aimed for a score of 15, kicking the pebble high in the air, he received the fright of a lifetime. Luck was on his side that day, especially his foot. Within a split second, Hajime couldnt fathom what caused the pebble to be sliced in half before he could kick it again, but sure enough, he got his answer looking down. It was that goddamn ax, its blade embedded two-thirds into the earth. Never before had he been thankful for keeping his toes. As suspected, Paulie had his hand stretched, clearing his throat to say, Sorry about that. I was afraid I lost my touch. Oh, really? Then why not aim for your beard? Hajime chuckled, shining another pearly white grin with his sharp, hawk-like eyes. Boomerang trick shots are too advanced for even my expertise. That aside, Im surprised you didnt yell your lungs out, asking why I did such a thing without warning, let alone reason. Simple! he shrugged, still grinning. Theres no point in rationalizing how you motherfuckers think and behave. Im in another world, right? Were out here to do the same thing: to beat and pulverize everything that breathes. Frankly, I found my people, and now, I only seek better gameplay strategies, as the nerds call it. Just dont make it boring. Paulie caressed his chin, returning his expression, if only slightly. Incredible, Mr. Hajime. His Majesty was right about you in many ways, and you know what? He pulled out his phone, asking the other line to release the barrier, even the wave of slimes surrounded them like mountains at every horizon. I expected todays work to be an hour-long lecture about skills and upgrades, but for the sake of spicing things up, whos hungry for some fun? I am! Once again, the P.L.A.Y. trainees bleated in unison like sheep in a flock, except for Hajime. Fun was a main course best served in moments when life was just right. The squad began their battle against the gooey bastards in a single file, following Paulie as he gave the slimes a little off the top of their heads with one or two swings. Those who survived would meet a worse fate at the hands of Hajimes electric flurry; punch by punch and kick by kick, the smiling menace had returned. Remember, everyone! said Paulie, hacking through slime after slime but with no stain on his flannel shirt at any moment. The third upgrade option is always unique to every player and is your most powerful skill. Just dont rely on it too much! Indeed, it was advice to take at heart, seeing as Farkas displayed a far deadlier skill than any measly sword or shield. Wolfsjagd! he shouted, bearing nine-inch claws that summoned miniature tornados out of nowhere with every swipe. It may not have seemed that bad were it not for the slimes getting reduced to ribbons inside. Wow, you love calling out your attacks, man? said Hajime, speeding through numerous enemies like a car at a deer. Not gonna lie, that wont be my forte from here on. To each their own, dude, Farkas replied. Just dont let it get into your head like last time. The first boss is coming soon. Oh, believe me, I wont. My feet are growing cold, even if you dont see it! He cracked his knuckles, his heart beating faster than a rabbit in heat. Even as he took a breather, his always reliable [Tesla Aura] continued obliterating any slime within a 100-meter diameter. He wouldve loved its previous level of raining proverbial lightning from the heavens, but his screen showed him admittedly better options this time.
Choose an Upgrade
Way of the Fist If you discover this tale on Amazon, be aware that it has been unlawfully taken from Royal Road. Please report it. The pragmatic rage of ancient quarrel +45 ATK, -8 DEF, +30 SPD. Gain super skill [Double Knuckle], 3-second cooldown
Way of the Herb The gentle touch of ancient remedy +20 ATK, +30 DEF, -15 SPD, +70 HEAL. Gain super skill [Hermes Domain], 4-second cooldown
Way of the Thunder The overwhelming power of ancient godhood +100 ATK, -100 DEF, +100 SPD. Gain super skill [Zeus Railgun], 6-second cooldown
Clearly, it was either another boost to Hajimes raw strength or the new ability to recover from fatal injuries if not careful enough. For a balanced build, he chose the latter in a heartbeat. It wasnt like a tiny sacrifice to his speed would stop him from sprinting around the planet seven times a second. Farkas could vouch for him on such an unimaginable feat anytime. The power of self-healing was a no-brainer in more ways than one, especially when Queen Gelatina let out a bellowing screech that echoed across the field. He wished he sweated an entire ocean as his mind betrayed him again with a grueling recollection. Deep down, he knew its noise before the inevitable. The slime matriarchs [Constellation Beam] fired at a billionth of a millionth of a second, obliterating her own subjects in the field. Hajime supposed she literally had no heart since she captured the rest of their squad into her acidic mass. His mind agreed he might as well get used to every minute of the experience from now, enduring such stinging agony inside her before a respawn. Then again, snapping back to reality sounded nicer. He raised his arm, barring what remained of the P.L.A.Y. behind him from coming any closer. Youre right, Farkas. I cant afford to be a cocky douchenozzle when facing the horde. If those motherfuckers died for real, Id never hear the end of it, and neither would you, but for the first time, I feel like I can touch the sky. How about you? Farkas let out a lengthy sigh, casually blowing away surrounding foes with a single hand wave. Its up to us to decide on that, dude. I hate to admit it, but Im on my 30th game over since we met. All I knew was that I was always thrilled to fight another day. With a clenched fist, Hajime cackled like a Saturday morning cartoon villain. Yeah, thats what I thought. Streams of electricity ran across his torso and even onto his stylish fade cut. It was a fitting touch that reminded him of his favorite show about simian-like aliens going at each other with absurd power levels. Each step he took had him darting around the field in a spark, leaving only charred footprints from one spot to the next. One spark, two sparks, and three sparks backthe menace within was fully unleashed as he delivered blow after blow. Queen Gelatina had yet to keep up with her slow charge time, but he remained vigilant at heart, seeing as how she eventually compensated with a simple trick. The matriarch, growing desperate, fired multiple beams of blinding purple at random. Still, Hajime pushed on with every ounce of his pride within his godlike senses, with the world now seeming like molasses every step of the way. It was another day where his pearly white grin never faded. They should engrave the word fun on his forehead after this, but like all good things, there had to be a satisfying end. And so, he wished to conclude their one-sided battle with an equally one-sided attack. Though if the expressions of Farkas and Paulie were anything to go by, it was more accurate to call it unorthodox beyond belief. Hajime leaped into Queen Gelatinas colossal mass in a single bound, slowly absorbed like a fly on syrup. But if the slime matriarch had any brain cells in her biology, she would know not to consume the one human bug zapper. Too late to regret, too early to die. Alas, Her Poor Majesty suffered from her insides breaking apart, shaking more and more violently like the sound wave of an MP3 player, until she burst altogether high enough into the clouds. This rain smelled of lavenders and honey, which he didnt mind much. What he did mind, however, was a long shower.
Far behind the scenes once again, the watchful gazes began to exchange interest in the current reborn hero. Perhaps he could fit a niche within their ranks all along, but one of them wasnt so impressed, gritting their teeth with a furrowed brow. Hhm! What shameless arrogance. Yet another lunatic who would be of no help to my people. The Singing Flutes and I are more than enough. We need not of his ilk. Dont be so confident about your meager party of five, Feuer. The horde wont rest while you waste your energy on a young master who has shown the most potential since your arrival. Then, let me put that to the test! Let me be enlightened by this orc of a creature in a duel! I can wait till Midsummers Eve if I must, with all but your utmost permission, Sir. Done. I just hope you wont murder him too much. I cant stand the color red. 5. Concerning Goblins The horde subsided, for now, enough time for the P.L.A.Y. trainees to shower Hajime with praise. He didnt quite understand why no more enemies surrounded them like the apocalypse, but the next screen couldnt have given him the answer any quicker.
Goblins Incoming
Continue?
YES NO
He witnessed the other players yelling in sheer joy for the next battle. He supposed it was their turn to show the fruits of their training long before he came into the picture. But the option of wanting to continue or not perplexed him in many ways. Whether it meant another slime fest or an entirely new monster, he never thought the game would even have such options at the ready. You dont need to fight with them, said Farkas, walking closer from behind. You had your fun, didnt you? Besides, my muscles are aching. Wanna go back for some prime ribs? Hajime squinted at the screen for a few more moments, humming as he pondered if the beast within hadnt had its fill yet. Then again, his stomach rumbled for a similar fill, too. Sure, but only after I see what theyre up against this time, he turned around with a shrug. Lets have a seat somewhere. Um, okay. The two settled on a house-sized boulder, far enough that the rest of the P.L.A.Y. seemed more like ants. It was the perfect spot, and witnessing a protective barrier unfold around them made him wonder if Agrima was over reliant on this pixie dust. All he knew now was that the horde was in their comrades hands. And what a tenacious new monster they had to deal with in the form of the goblin. Goblins were more interesting than any slime. Hajime couldnt get enough of them swinging their rusty weapons like a blindfolded pi?ata party, and if he kneeled in front of them, he would still be eight inches taller. Their fashion sense remained typical as ever, fit for a low-budget mobile game, but at least some of the loincloths varied in color. One was even a flashy dye of aquamarine. Their tactics were also a step up from the last; he would love to experience it some other time. Despite their sheer lack of any semblance of swordplay, they took advantage of swinging in a single cue repeatedly without rest. He hated to admit it, but one of the trainees met a quick demise to the throat, even as the horde had yet to number in the millions. Fortunately, their instructor always triumphed like the superheroes of old. Paulie gave them more than a taste of their own medicine by lunging his ax, turning it into a device tailor-made for instant decapitation. He didnt let his beast of a frame slow him down, either, as Hajime couldve sworn he also got destined for the [Way of the Thunder]. Suddenly, the horde really was in the millions, and he led the way with a formidable shout for their second victory. You know, Im convinced already, said Hajime, resting his hand on a raised leg as he cracked a smile at Farkas. Convinced about what? That Pauls a great dude to be around! Imagine if you guys lived your lives in my world instead. Even if everyone treated you like a freak show, I cant say we wouldnt have made memories together. Besides, hed be the king of basketball in a heartbeat! Farkas failed to contain the laughter in his mouth and proceeded to lay under the stars of the evening sky. So do all of us, Hajime. We all belong somewhere. Hajime continued observing Paulie and his team as more goblins ran with their tails tucked between their legs. He never knew much about mob programming, but despite the games companion app telling him they had no soul, it always seemed hyperrealistic, as an internet horror story of a cursed Godzilla cartridge would describe it. If you discover this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the violation. But of course, the goblins didnt just cower in fear, due to Paulie making swift work of them. The ground shook from the bellows of a towering behemoth in the distance, and when the smoke cleared, Hajime watched in awe of such gnarled teeth stained with the blood of human flesh. Their screens popped open in a synchronized tune, signaling the arrival of their new challenge.
Boss Battle
Zelophehad, Tyrant of the Unseen Marsh
HP 100,000,000
ATK 12,000
DEF 6,000
SPD 2,000
Never in his wildest dreams would Hajime have thought goblins could be just as menacing as the devil itself. One could only imagine how his ax matched with Paulies in a duel, seeing as how this impeccable king also knew of the word fun through his face. Zelophedad seemed to switch between two attack patterns, with the first directed at Paulie. With a screen aptly calling it the [Tornado Rumble], the goblin king arched his every swing downward, leaving patches of unearthed soil as he chased Paulie throughout the field like a spinning top. Is that all you got? Im just getting started! said Paulie, dodging at great strides right before he countered the attack to a full stop with a single opposite swing. You should know better not to mess with me, you hulking sack of cavities! Not bad, as he thought to himself. He was never the only one who knew of the thrill of battle, but the goblin kings second attack method showed a different side of Paulie, and it couldnt have been more poetic. To think that an NPC could achieve the sacred art of the boomerang trickshot, where even their instructor couldnt catch his ax mid-twirl at least three times by now. Paulie recovered from a fleeting backflip, breathing like a sinner as he lowered his beloved weapon in defeat. All right, thats enough for me for today, he said, turning to the others. Dont get me wrong, I can beat this son-of-a-bitch in my sleep, but seeing him with those moves makes me a bit jealous. As for you guys, knock yourselves out! Hajime never thought to find such palpable hilarity in the notion. Although the P.L.A.Y. trainees continued showing their own brand of funsome lasting a few minutes longer than the resthis mind had observed enough action for one day. Farkas must be awfully famished too, if he had anything to say about it.
Warping back to the main city, the two decided to try something other than a massive slab of beef on their plates. It was about time Hajime relived the sweetness of aborted salmon offspring wrapped in seaweed, or in human language terms, sushi. Frankly, he had given up on wondering why Agriman cuisine was about as exotic as a Happy Meal. That aside, he was amazed at the many more things Farkas had to explain. It was only because the idea of goblin lore in a game where you would slaughter everything in seconds proved to be a decent page-turner, starting with the following: They feared sunny days and enjoyed colder nights. They lived in huts made out of the skin of their rivals. They enjoyed a game of slime hockey now and then. Whether or not Hajime would even witness such events didnt matter, as the companion app on his phone presented him with more flavor text of their supposed livelihood. It was fun to read, and fun was the greatest teacher of all, hoping no offense on Paulies behalf. But since they continued this charade of info dumping in another world, it rekindled his confusion over why Agriman cuisine was indeed about as exotic as a Happy Meal. You get what Im saying, right? he continued, his mouth half-full of salmon roe. Here I am in a realm filled with motherfuckers who have six arms, yet Im still chugging my next bloody mary. Talk about a lack of variety. Farkas took a sip of his macchiato ever so slightly before he could answer with confidence. Oh, weve got a lot of variety in our palette, all right. In fact, I can give you a literal taste of my peoples culture: lantek. La- what now? Lantek. It roughly means ice meat, but trust me, its better than it sounds. Lets go. And so, Hajime finally had the chance to expand his culinary horizons beyond anything back home. After a mere few blocks away, a distinct aroma already pervaded the air, smelling vaguely of turkey and lamb. The restaurant itself also had its moments, fashioned like a cabin straight out of a Bob Ross painting. That only meant the place was pure warm goodness all around, despite Farkas revealing today was one of their busier hours. Welcome to Dougland Bites! said the host by the door. Weve got free drinks every Sunday, so you better book a reservation! Farkas requested their specialty as promised. It wouldve been so usual if it didnt earn him a few joyful glances from the other customers. It was almost like they expected some eating contest of the messiest degree. Hajimes intuition might be right at this moment, as he heard the hoarse laughter of a familiar voice coupled with familiar earth-shaking footsteps. Make us proud again, Farkas! cried Paulie, his beard slobbered with ale from top to bottom. What do you say we order a hundred for each of us and see who comes out on top? Im sure Mr. Hajime wouldnt mind. The cheers from everyone on Dougland Bites roared in a steady pace of encouragement. Farkas couldnt help but smile before raising his hand for their silence. All right. Lets teach him a bit of Agriman hospitality. The customers cheered louder as they welcomed the newly reborn hero to the competition. His pearly white grin returned with a vengeance; after all, fun was a main course best served when life was just right. 6. The Fun Trio Lantek: the national dish of the Lupinian palette, encased in dry ice from top to bottom based on their advertising. The customers of Dougland Bites exchanged rumors about how they would prepare such a meal of unorthodox proportions. Their most experienced cooks wasted no time showing them in the most fun way possible, and that fun way began with a 20-foot-long flat top emerging at the restaurants center. Hajime admitted to himself the hidden compartment trick was unexpected for the cabin design they had going on. What was also unexpected were the words of several displeased minds around him. To them, lantek was like a slab of pale steak without a fair bit of seasoning. Some went above to claim it was an exotic gimmick accepted in their society solely to form better relations with a race that never wore shoes. Scratching his head, he failed to comprehend their oddly specific complaints in any manner of conversation. But he supposed it was a given that people loved their excuses against outsiders, even in another world. Does this ever bother you? he turned to Farkas. On my first day, yeah, but all I feel for them now is pity. Theyll never enjoy the next thing on their plates because they dont serve cheeseburgers here! Farkas smiled for the foretold pity he had for those who locked eyes on his presence. Hajime laughed at their expense if he didnt already, hoping the restaurants double doors would hit them on the way out double time. Well, they shouldve thought of that when they entered a place like this, he said, stunned by the less-than-stellar logic of their complaints. The cooks announced to everyone in the room that their Lantek Specialty Supreme would commence, their spatulas held high in presentation for what he could only describe as a non-vocal musical of spice and technique. The meat flew above their toques with every turn, touched with salt and pepper from the bottom just before they landed back on the grill. The sizzling beauty of their craft only got better with the aroma, as he was confident it would be enough to kill a man happy on their first whiff. Then came the unorthodox, at least according to the uptight and ignorant. The cooks pulled several dividers across the flat top, assembling uniform rectangles that held each of the thirty steaks they made within ten minutes. Indeed, he counted the clock on his phone to see how long the final method would take after all that tossing and spinning. The customers watched with full intent. Suffice it to say his heart wasnt ready for what came next; a network of chrome tubes from the ceiling came down to give the meat the coldest shower they would ever get. In an instant, he saw the Ice Age recreated on their meal. Indeed, their advertising told the truth like a humble sinner, and his stomach began revving up a storm for this Lantek Specialty Supreme. Many more chefs came rushing from the kitchen, setting the perfect table for the three contestants of their annual Bite Freeze contest. If there were any day Hajime wouldnt shine his pearly white grin, hed be six feet under thrice. Farkas and Paulie showed more or less the same face of childish excitement, not even bothering to walk with grace and dignity. Standing before the table, the host cleared his throat as the lights dimmed around them. Welcome, everyone, to this years Bite Freeze! As always, the rules are no hidden utensils, no hidden lighters, and no hidden malice. Fairness is next to godliness. Whoever triumphs with their bare hands wins 50,000 Quid in cash! Now, on your mark Hajime set his sights on the prize the moment they laid out the seventeen plates he needed to finish within seventeen minutes. It was a Herculean task, to be sure, but a welcome one. His heart raced at the anticipation of the word go; before he knew it, he licked his first helping clean as though his senses had forgotten the chilling needles that were dry ice. It was also a surprise that the meat remained warm and soft, a delectable reward for their voracious appetite. Although he could care less whatever chewing technique his friends used as an advantage, he could tell the noise of their mouths was equal to his competitive spirit. Five down and twelve more to go, the mess and mayhem only became louder. The crowd didnt help much if they ever did. However, like with all good things, there was a price. Despite being able to pry open the blocks of ice like cardboard, a growing sting washed over his palms. There was no doubt about it. The time came for the grueling numbness called chilblains, frostbites annoying little cousin, to take effect. If you spot this tale on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation. It was quite the spirit breaker. To think when the remaining twelve steaks would become nearly impossible to finish at this rate. Luckily, his two friends didnt fare well either, including Farkas, who appeared to have fought the temptation of a monstrous gag reflex. Seeing their purple-cheeked faces gave him the will to continue no matter what. On Hajimes tenth helping, the consequences were in full swing. There was little to no sensation left down to his fingertips, but at least he didnt end up like Paulie, getting dragged by the paramedics. They were kind enough to call a military chopper to support his girth beneath a web of bungee cords. He supposed this was the final showdown, as Farkas finally finished the same amount. With two steaks remaining on each side, the contestants took a breather, slumping on their chairs with a blank stare at the ceiling. He wouldnt want to stop now, but his body insisted too many times already. Bruh I think my skins peeling off he said in a tone not unlike a bad case of sore throat. Yeah Farkas responded with a similar wisp. Us having the strength of a thousand dinosaurs doesnt mean much right now. Too bad for you, though. Why? Because I wont back down for that extra cash! Magnificent. Hajime never wouldve thought Farkas had any other life motive beyond earning self-respect, but he supposed this was another way to go about it. It must be satisfying to become this years Bite Freeze winner. That was why he didnt take chances, gobbling down his meal before the final plate. They had set the stage for this moment in perfect timing. The audience howled. Although Hajimes hands were still stiff as a roadkill rat under the sun, he gathered his remaining strength to shatter the ice with multiple blows faster than Farkas could. It was the only thing they could do. The host even drummed up the excitement with a 20-second countdown. His mind now got plagued with a mantra of demanding better speed than the last. No matter the cost, he resorted to digging his nails through it like his Lupinian friend, who seemed already halfway through his meal. It was over, he believed, so much for earning that 50K Quid he couldve used for a lifetime supply of protein bars. But his hands told a different story; they didnt seem to stop at all, and as though it were a blessing, a slight tingle ran across his nerves. It was quite an unexpected light show for everyone involved. Jolts of unmistakable lightning flew everywhere as Hajime roared for his rightful reward, which gave some customers sparking afros that would probably remain with them for a week. Once his senses caught up, he licked the final plate clean already. The host, who cowered under his stand, stood with a smile wide as the moon. He did it Hes done it! We have our new winner! If he knew there were consolation prizes for the runner-ups, perhaps he wouldnt have pushed himself too much. But with the crowd applauding his victory like an Olympic medalistand Farkas joining in with a face of acceptance and gratitudehe was eager to bask in the glory for the whole day. After all, they served free brunslim for this occasion. Brunslim? The hells that? he asked, nearing a whisper as he returned Farkas smile. Oh, dont worry. Youll love it, assuming youve had a taste for cakes dipped in mounds of chocolate! The two shared their laughter throughout the night, finally united by a sense of belonging in another world.
Resting on four king-sized beds at the St. Florence Medical Center, Paulie couldnt help but giggle at seeing the joy of his friends through a live video call. He wouldve let them sit on his biceps for a photo shoot to remember. Right after their call ended, the hospital telephone rang next. Paulie hoped one of the nurses finally found an interest in his pectoral flexing back at the ICU. Too bad it was something else entirely. No way, are you serious? he said, sweating bullets from his forehead. But Im not ready yet! I cant meet with him looking like this. I have to Glad to see youre still in good spirits, Paulie. It was already too late. Paulie knew that distinct voice of flowing honey anywhere, and as always, it came from his left side. He didnt doubt it was the King of Agrima sitting beside him, who rested one leg like any aristocrat of unbridled sophistry would. Y-Your Majesty! My apologies for being, agh! Paulie failed to prostrate himself properly in his bed. Then again, it didnt seem appropriate in the first place. Please, call me Harald. Hows your stomach getting pumped? Um, fine, actually. Good. I prepared myself for the worst coming here, but I expect nothing less from your one-of-a-kind physique. Paulie laughed at the notion even if he had heard of it for the eleventh time this month. Tell me about it, but I gotta admit that lantek stuff sure was more than I could ever chew. Well, I dont see that as you falling short in the contest, Harald reassured. Because of that, the Seven Miracles have taken a better liking with the young master, except one. I hope I dont even need to tell you his name. It doesnt take much guesses anyway. Paulies expression morphed into a mix of dread and disappointment, giving a long sigh for what was to come. Oh, no. That sun-blazing dickhead is going to test another one, isnt he? 7. Burning Hatred Blessed with the break of dawn, Agrima seemed like an untouched forest of peace and tranquility for a moment. Hajime wouldnt have thought otherwise if not for the skyscrapers and cable cars on the horizon, which the two had ridden for home. Farkas caught him with a slight blush on his cheek when the only option was the Lovers Deck. It didnt stop there, either, as they stepped foot together. Jesus H. Christ, this is awkward, he said, extending his shoulders on the other seat. Dont get the wrong idea. I just thought the pink color scheme was a bit much. Farkas chuckled at the rather strange remark no one would ask in the first place. You dont need to hide anything from me, dude, even if I cant return the feeling. Nah, man, thats not what I meant. Hajime reached for his pockets to smoke an equally strange brand name: Breathing Blues. Back home, people have a saying about coming out of the closet, but I guess you have an idea what that means, right? Kinda, yeah. In Lupis, we instead say jumping the mountain. Good, because I never needed to do such things. When I discovered both mom and dads nudie mags, I realized I didnt care whose tits and ass were hotter than the other. I yelled out to them, I love them all! So sexy! and got grounded for a week. Once again, they shared the laughter for a few moments, the joys of learning their first hint of the birds and the bees before their teachers could bore them to tears on the subject. Farkas shared his experience of a girl he met who snuck into her fathers shadow puppet tapes. Indeed, it was a big eye-opener for him to learn that Lupinians made such frisky content in that art form. Even more interesting was the coincidence of their coming-of-age journeys going in full swing once they were in 7th grade. Hajime wondered if it was similar for Paulie, but Farkas laughed much louder than before, almost like he held back on an embarrassing tale so spicy that not even Mel Brooks could come up with. Eventually, their conversation changed. It changed far enough that they no longer discussed personal stories and more into what occurred during the contest. He remembered every detail of his fingers catching a spark as though he were a superhero back from a freak lab accident. It was just weird, man, Hajime continued. I know Ive got the [Way of the Thunder], but I dont think Im even level 1 right now. Also, its getting pretty warm here. Mind if you open a window? Sure, Farkas obliged in a heartbeat. Anyway, let me rephrase what you said. You might have an idea why that happened already, but if youre still confused, lets say we players have a much different The unusual heat inside the cable car returned with a vengeance, and the humidity only worsened each second. It wouldnt be out of the question that it was like they were in a sauna with a broken thermostat. Opening more windows did nothing to alleviate the waterfall of sweat dripping down their foreheads. Seconds later, a cascade of waving shapes bombarded his senses, especially with the six-eyed Farkas before him. Now was a good time to call emergency services, only for his friend to fall face-first into the metal floor, and his turn to do the same loomed ever closer. Although Hajime knew he gasped for any available oxygen in this metaphorical desert of misery, his body told him to give up one last time, and he didwith a pain too dull for his nasal bones to register.
The wind howled. Hajime could only discern the softness of grass as his eyes peeked sluggishly in his surroundings. It was all too familiar, the tall fescue beneath his feet and nothing else whenever he fought the horde. There were also boulders everywhere, as expected. He never liked jumping to conclusions, yet someone here had a definite ax to grind, and it wasnt Paulies. In fact, the wind didnt take long to present the culprit with a near-silent sway of their long black hair. He couldnt put his finger on it, but the man before him had much to tell, judging by his tuxedo adorned with flames like a fallen phoenix. The mans eyes werent any less mysterious. It appeared he had the perpetual look of an unfeeling judge ready to pass him the punishment of a lifetime. He remained silent for what wouldve been hours upon hours, and all he did next was a slow hand raise near his chest. Before Hajime could ask anything in good faith, he witnessed the same hand glow like a dreadful sun in the middle of the Sahara. Welcome to your torment, Kato, said the man in a juxtaposing tone not unlike a cruel blizzard of disdain.This novel is published on a different platform. Support the original author by finding the official source. Hajime shielded his eyes until the man decided not to give him permanent blindness. He didnt know what to expect from such a frigid presence, but he needed to ask, Could you not do that again, please? I might jump you if you do. I aint got a lot of patience after what you did to my new bud. Who said I would listen to the wishes of your ilk? That was a small taste of your torment, but you need not worry about your friends whereabouts. He is as sound as a newborn rabbit back in his bed. Now, before we begin The man lowered his head for a polite greeting of his name: Clovis von Hans Freidrich Conrad Bruno Axel Hildebrand. He emphasized never to say it in full before pacing himself closer. The mysteries surrounding him remained, but he was kind enough to share his resume of fighting the horde for five years before his arrival. Even with this charade of questions impossible to answer right now, Hajime raised both eyebrows in realization. Oh, I get it. Youre one of the guys on top who thought I looked like a jackass on my first try. If so, you should probably eat a Snickers before you try to reclaim your dignity. I do not need such games and insolence, Kato, said Clovis with the same indifferent face. If the P.L.A.Y. had any bona fide dignity beyond their vulgar delusions of pride, you may as well be their idol. They turned disheartened because you met your demise too quickly. As for me, however, I have nothing to give but all my resentment straight to the heart. All right, so what are you really here for? He gave Clovis a fair glance of his confidence and ego, only to vanish as soon as he realized he had conversed with the air. Any sign of the bastard became no different from pure imagination. That was until a prickling jolt bristled his chin, a warning that came flashing before his eyes in the form of a fist clad in radiance and heat. The gash on his cheek went so deep that his tongue could dangle out of it. The intense glow of Clovis hand dimmed again for the next blow, cracking each of his knuckles with inhuman twists and bends like a mangled puppet. To quell my disgust, Kato, he answered. What more should I reveal beyond your torment? Stand tall if you can. Once again today, Hajime shined a pearly white grin at something brewing to be tons of fun. Clovis threats were like a sign that he really was in another world filled with people right out of a low-budget fantasy movie. He could only hope Clovis true vendetta matched his own, shaking his head with a continuous tsk of his teeth. Clovis stopped in his tracks, raising an eyebrow. What disappoints you so? A lot of things, Mr. Shakespeare, he said, ready to choose his favorite upgrade on the screen. You think youre the first motherfucker in my life to show me this dogshit sense of superiority? Whoever you think I am, I am not. Why? Because thats how growing up works. But if you wanna know why Im humoring your request, its simple: you disgust me too.
{Welcome to Beware the Horde}
[Way of the Thunder] Selected
Slime Wave Incoming
Clovis responded accordingly to their duel, only that his hands appeared to stop glowing a hellish yellow. Whatever the case, the other option he picked made him draw an unassuming blade from an unassuming scabbard. There was no doubt about it; he chose the [Way of the Sword], the most basic upgrade available. Hajime sighed, still wondering why such a man could be so committed to the clich rival trope without irony. I could care less how much you look down on me, man. Thats my forte against the horde, anyway. Even if I die a million times, Ill at least have what we earthlings call fun. Oh, but that is far from my intention, Kato, said Clovis, readying his stance with a pointed thrust. I merely yearn to see your head flying into the sun. You recall one of the [Blessings] you unlocked, do you not? Nine lives for nine tries. Admittedly, he didnt expect the surprising twist. Since there was no point in delaying the inevitable with another meandering conversation, he took the opportunity to use a super skill for the first timethe almighty [Zeus Railgun]. Time began to flow like molasses through his eyes, and the surge of pure lightning in his hand grew in unruly intensity with each microsecond. What Hajime needed to do next was simple. A row of seven rings aligned perfectly on his palm before he would create a single tiny bolt at the start, which still screeched like a thousand electricity pylons in unison. In his words, it was to be the coolest shit in history, and it wouldve been if he didnt feel a sharp sting from the neck down. Clovis, who suddenly stood behind his back a few feet away, grabbed a handkerchief from his pocket to remove the crimson stain of his blade in one swift motion, as swift as his victory. It wouldnt be the last when he demanded Hajime to get up quickly, who came back to existence in a shroud of the ever-so-familiar pixie dust. Eight kills in, Clovis showed no mercy again. Seven kills in, he switched to his left. Six kills in, his method had yet to change. Five. Four. Three. Two. One.
GAME OVER
The wind howled, especially back in the city. All the slimes that tried to attack the two players during their duel had either met a zapping end or burning demise whenever they got close. Frankly, they never noticed their presence, but Clovis achieved the highest kill count that day because of the victory he''d relish for a week. Silver clouds flew overhead as his gaze turned to the sky. My sincerest apologies, Maria, but they will never be you. Never. 8. The Crownless King It was all over the news. The divisive yet respected Clovis had started another test for a new reborn hero more unfair than a match between a fish and an elephant. Some argued Hajime might have won if he were a bit more humble toward the strongest player today, while others claimed he never stood a snowballs chance in hell, or in his case, the sun incarnate. For the first time in decades, the clock of Agrimas central spire rang twelve times like a funeral call of the ages. Several citizens exchanged bewildered glances at their peers, wondering what the higher-ups in the Minos Chamber had in store for the current events. It was only a matter of time when they could no longer tolerate such internal strife as the horde continued its brutal existence. The lobby had a rather unfortunate issue at the moment. Numerous officials, crammed in every corner, learned that using too many [Insta-Warp] cards in the same area caused interferences that wouldve lasted the whole day were it not for a literal divine intervention. Before they could bleat at the staff with all their rage, they found themselves already standing before their seats in the blink of an eye. Still, their rage didnt subside, and if anything, many called for Haralds presence at the [Table of Fate], demanding how he could possibly respond to their predicament with his usual confidence. His hospitality may have been generous enough to present them with a banquet about to begin, but there was no cure for absence. Enough of your charades, Harald. Show yourself! said one of them with the grayest beard. If I hear you snapping your fingers again, Im gonna slice them off with my cigar cut Aah! In his horror, his hand already held the bloody digits he wished to remove. His near heart attack experience only worsened as the hallway behind them echoed with the footsteps of shiny black boots. I hate to be that tyrant, but its Your Majesty to you, said Harald, already in his D.I.Y. wooden throne he found at a strip mall. It seemed like a scam, but the varnish was excellent for its meager price of 150 Quid. He crossed his legs, smiling at everyone as though he had devised the most devilish prank in history. The gray-bearded man furrowed his brow and gritted his teeth right in his face. Well, youre not an actual king, are you? Youre only here because of the popular vote. If you dont respect us, veterans who once kept the horde at bay for years, then we can no longer respect you either. Sorry to say, but I dont think you players ever believed in respect, Harald retorted. The committee squinted on the brief confusion and absurdity their ears had the displeasure of knowing. Not once did any elected king before him say such things; it wouldve been more fitting for a jester, but Harald had his reasons. If they were less skeptical of his position, the banquet wouldnt be as delicious, helping himself with a spoonful of pork jelly. Look closely at our destiny, he pointed. What do you see? The first thing to know about the [Table of Fate] was the gilded clockwork it possessed, adorned with the map of a million stars of an irregular nature. The officials gasped in near unison when they noticed a glaring discrepancy in the mechanism. The minute hand twitched back and forth like on a broken watch, and the hour hand remained still. Harald giggled at their frantic responses that would solve nothing in the first place, devolving into a food fight, as earthlings called it. He had the answers to their anger, but it was still a scene to remember, especially when his head needed to avoid a flying bottle. Settle down, gentlemen, he said, carried by a tone of flowing honey despite his voice blaring like a megaphone. This is an office, not a daycare. Our sincerest apologies, Your Majesty, but this is more than urgent. We havent seen the flow of our reality at a complete stop since Ms. Taranis joined our ranks. No matter how you look at it, that horrid thing will escape again because of Hajimes presence. Youre not wrong, but youve missed something else entirely: the constellations. Again, what do you see? Indeed, despite all the tossing of ham and ice cream at each other, the stars on the [Table of Fate] remained moving. Some didnt want to admit it, but this was the one thing that never happened before, an easy blunder to miss. They waited for Haralds explanation in silence, hoping the public may have chosen the right leader for any situation at stake.If you spot this tale on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation. He returned to his throne, spinning a tarnished yellow globe with his index finger. Im as surprised as you are, honestly. I only approved of Hajime because he was perfect against the horde, just like I approved of the Seven Miracles, but I understand now. Hajime and Clovis may not have followed the story, but the [Ambrosia Cluster] still isnt doomed. Yes, but what about the others? said another official. Numerous, infinitely multiplying realities that would make an astronomer faint? That will be a topic for another time. For now, we can rest assured that players having no respect may work in our favor. In fact, what really turns one into a player? A burning desire for peace? An indomitable will to protect the weak? No! Its madness, hidden deep in the hearts of every being across the cosmos! Those who fancy themselves pure and humble should know better. Harald didnt know what to expect from the committee with his monologue based on a debunked theory about becoming a player. It could be possible if he believed hard enough, but perhaps even that was out of his power. Standing near the full-glass view behind them, a majestic bloom of flowers appeared from his touch like an interactive windowdespite not being part of the Minos Chambers features. Things are getting too dire, gentlemen, he continued. We cant afford to lose another comrade who is beyond the realm of strength, and Clovis just happens to be one of them isnt that right? Incredible. Before anyone could protest, the hated Clovis had already stood before the king, albeit without his consent. Why? Why have you sent me here? he said, eyes still looking as indifferent as they ever were. To forfeit your pardon, Im afraid. As you can see, the court has had enough, Harald replied. Out of the suggestion they made years ago, I sentence you to solitary confinement for five months. After all, death besides natural aging is a thing of the past for every player. Clovis averted his gaze without a word. After a good minute or so, he sighed at the inevitable. Very well, but first, I must tell the Singing Flutes of my punishment. Please do. Your planets still in danger, isnt it? said the king with a smile of unbridled confidence. Its best if you use all your days improving your skills, and Hajime deserves at least 80K Quid of assault charges isnt that right? Damn straight! Out of nowhere again, there was another player in the room. Clovis was a bit surprised when those roaring words echoed behind him. Sure enough, it was his former victim; before his hands could glow in sunlight radiance, his head got greeted by a jolting back fist traveling a million times faster than sound. Tomatoes. Red, red tomatoes.
Clovis gushing body scared the living daylights out of the entire committee, with most deciding to leave for good. Hajime saw it as the best reaction toward a pompous prick who had it coming more than once. It was also good that his blue Hawaiian shirt carried on with every revival, always smelling fresh from the laundry. He stretched his legs from side to side, always resulting in a near perfect split. Man, I thought he could tank it. Still happy, though. Congratulations, young master, said Harald, clapping at a snails pace. It seems revenge really is the sweetest dessert. Why thank you, Your Not-So-Majesty. Yes, I read articles about your personal life. Now, if youll excuse me Hajime walked a few steps away and stood at a specific spot that would only make if he knew what would happen. He very much did. As Clovis old carcass disappeared into the same elusive pixie dust, the new Clovis returned with his [Inta-Warp] card. It was a shame he met the same fate again, only with Hajime swinging a decisive left hook no slower than a thunderbolt to a tree. Tomatoes. Red, red tomatoes. Harald sighed, his gaze fixed on the velvet carpet across the room. Damn it, I always hated this color. Pardon? said Hajime, picking his ear like a chimpanzee that hadnt groomed itself in weeks. I dont like blood. It stains, smells, and gets everywhere. Lucky for me, its only a temporary problem. Harald snapped his fingers. Within the time a fly could beat its wings, the carpet returned to its fresh lilac scent, cleaned to perfection. He chuckled at the kings unquestionable power fitting for a god like his own. To think the elections had hidden such a daunting figure among them, yet Harald didnt seem like the dictator type just by noticing his ponytail as long as his torso. Woah, what kind of creative mode shit is that? Well, in fairness, thats pretty accurate with the many things I can do, Harald confirmed, returning to his throne. By the way, how did you know where Clovis would emerge through teleportation? Pretty easy, actually, Hajime shrugged. There are too many things I still dont know about this world, but whenever I picture myself transporting into a place Ive never been, I always end up outside. But when I go to places Ive already been in, I always end up inside and near the Before he could finish his words like an exposition in a fantasy novel, he needed to take out the trash thrice. His mind decided to give the revived Clovis an old-fashioned neck snap, twisting it to a 180 crunch of pure satisfaction. Cruelty was now his goal if he didnt embrace it anyway. center. Always near the center, said Hajime, pointing at the king while also explaining how he sparked his way to the top of Minos Chamber in a flash. With the fourth Clovis standing before him, he witnessed the most unexpected face from such a callous man. It was a face of resentment mixed with the sweat of a murderer trapped in a dead end. Perhaps justice had many forms. Whats wrong? Remember what you said? Nine lives for nine tries. 9. More to Life Than the Horde Hajime wouldve lied to himself if the word fun didnt loom over his head. He could taste the headlines: Clovis, the strongest player of today, was brought to his knees by the one who died a shameful death against the first boss. Some might argue he didnt give him a fair chance, but that was only natural. Not many could fathom the ecstasy of handing comeuppances like candy. Without a doubt in his mind, Clovis deserved every inch of his life dying again and again. Hajimes brand of justice was anything but blind and fair, demanding retribution at all costs. Five kills in, he showed no mercy. Four kills in, he switched to what hed call the shock-to-the-eyeballs method. Three. Two. One. With another neck snap, Clovis had the sting of demise thrust upon him nine times, as promised. Hajime celebrated in silence with a smoke of the Breathing Blues brand that grew on him almost as fast as his fists. He hoped the remaining officials who stayed wouldve loved one for themselves, but it was fruitless. It could be their trauma for all he knew. And yet, even as he accomplished the equal torment, Clovis returned with the same face of rage and fear. He could taste such unrivaled emotion just a foot away. As always, his pearly white grin shined brighter than ever, which he hoped would become his signature look in the media. Wouldnt you agree, Hildebrand? said Hajime, shrugging like the most condescending heel in pro wrestling. Yeah, you heard you. Your last names all over the tabloids long before you decided to be a thorn up my bunghole. Surprisingly, Clovis eyes calmed each second when he began catching his breath, sewing the signs of utter defeat. Enough Youve had your fill. Leave me at peace. Really? he replied, raising an eyebrow. Then why the fuck did you come back? Masochistic, much? Because Ive more to say than your rancid character would ever know! Clovis advanced with a slight limp on his left, his breath still shaken by the ordeal. You will never be Maria. Not when I still walk among the living! Yeah, yeah. Ill never be your grandma who could split logs with her bunions. Care to tell me why you said this out of nowhere, Hildebrand? Im not meeting her on the other side anytime soon unless you want me to. Clovis gritted his teeth, rage overshadowing fear faster than he could say, Shut your mouth, Kato! Speak more ill of her, and I might grant your wish somehow. A delightful laugh tried to escape Hajimes mouth, cheeks puffed until he could no longer hold it in one place. He continued his joy as he leaned on the full-glass view of the building. Wishes, you wanna talk about wishes? How about an apology? And I dont mean the usual kind. Get on your knees before I break them. let them shatter, Clovis replied before aiming a good, pasty spit on his forehead. All right, youre the boss. He honored his request in the shattering department, only it wasnt his knees. With a clenched fist, he aimed for the glass on his back at the force of a Concorde times a thousand. The noise never caught up until all the windows were nothing but shards finer than sand. On the bright side, nothing got pelted in the room like knives. Lets take it outside, shall we? Hajime continued, sticking his thumb out. If youre above saying sorry, why not we go around town with your mouth eating all sorts of dirt and concrete? Im sure theyll appreciate the art Ive made when I Divine intervention had struck again, minus the divine part in every way. Just when Hajime could nearly finish his speech and initiate an unforgettable rematch, his mind got blown away in the most literal sense possible. Right in the noggin, as people would say, which brought the sound of an A.W.P. rifle from hell. Clovis kept his distance from Hajime, who kissed the floor in a lifeless thud. He turned to the king and merely saw him shrugging with the same level of confusion brought upon the building. But then, he witnessed a piece of metal dropping from the bloody chasm where his head once was. Unmistakably, it was a standard .50 cal, only it faded into pixie dust like the target.This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road. If you spot it on Amazon, please report it. Harald took it upon himself to revert his beloved glass view of the world to its unharmed state with a snap. He sighed at the so-called strongest player while adjusting the ivory tie of his encompassing ponytail. I dont like blood, but I dont like cheap shots either. A thousand apologies, Your Majesty, said Clovis, straightening his back, but I swear on her life, this was beyond my intention. Im aware. Its just that your party is always unruly to a fault. Even I can never keep up. Not to mention, you still lack one member. Clovis reached for his virtual phone, remaining to breathe like an athlete after a marathon. At ease, Simo, he called. I am in no harm than I would ever be. The two expressed their leave at each other, hoping today would return to a sunny love affair for everyone involved.
Hajime awoke to the chirping of birds that appeared more like storks with long, coiling necks no different from a pythons. Apparently, some unimaginative Joe named them snake cranes as he turned the pages of an encyclopedia back at the penthouse. Farkas made a mean espresso for the three of them, though Paulie had to be a temporary citizen of their bathroom after consuming all those frozen steaks in the contest. Still, it didnt seem fair not to include him in the holy pastime that was their day off. Man, this shit is good! said Hajime, unaware of the piping-hot fumes from his mug. You Lupinians sure knew how to work up an appetite before dinner. Farkas sat on the other side of their circular dining table fresh from the box, courtesy of CarpenDwarf. Thanks. Its my grandfathers recipe, he replied, resting his legs on a footstool. By the way, those snake cranes youre seeing are native to Paulies home planet through migration. Well, thats interesting. Im sure the people there have a sport where they see how many swings they can Wait, migration? Yes, migration, Farkas emphasized. You shouldve seen how the kids reacted to their arrival back then. No, no, no. That doesnt make sense. Hajime put his mug aside and pointed a long finger at him, desperate to know what he couldve meant by that within scientific reason. Were in another world, right? So how the fuck can they Agrima once visited the planet Trom, young master. Out of nowhere, yet again, there was another player in the room, or more specifically, a king. The two screamed their lungs out like a pair of kindergartners before Haralds untimely presence. His mind was sure that Farkas wouldve created an anti-royal barrier around the place or something, not that he could imagine how to summon a barrier in the first place. Privacy should always be crucial, even in the otherworld. Youll have all the privacy you need once you check the new [Blessings] youve unlocked, said Harald, taking a peculiar third seat that could fit an elephant or two. What the fuck!? You can read minds, too? Hajime pointed a lengthier finger at the king, his shock going at full throttle on the many wonders he had witnessed in one person. Harald helped himself with another mean espresso by raising his hand as if he had already held one. Just do it, he took a sip in near silence. Okay. Hajime checked his phone, and indeed, he was presented with three more [Blessings] acquired, albeit with their bizarre objectives.
{Welcome to Beware the Horde}
3 Blessings Unlocked
Blacker Than Darkness Kill a fellow player by any means Cast barriers of any shape and size from any location. Scales up to 30% of current ATK
Medic! Deplete all your extra lives in a single playthrough Passive +15 Regen every second. Scales up to 50% of current HP. Cooldown is reduced by 0.5 every 10 levels
I''m Lovin'' It Consume more than the stomach can handle Gain the ability to summon a burger of any variety and a bottle of any drinkable liquid anywhere. Cannot summon more until both are finished
Incredible. All this time, Farkas had guided him to grow stronger with each baby step after the next. Still, it was interesting to know the game somehow addressed basic bodily needs, but he failed to understand why it would be so generous to grant him free food and beer for life. Oh, youll need it for your journey throughout the universe, young master, said Harald, finishing his cow print mug before it vanished into thin air. Stop invading my brain, man! Hajime exclaimed, but he let it slide for the day since his curiosity had yet to settle. Look, I dont know what youre talking about. I want a short, concrete answer because its almost time for me to cook some filet mignon. Harald caressed his chin briefly until he cracked a smile of pure mischief. With pleasure! Though, I must say I can get my point across better with this. He snapped his fingers again, only he raised them high into the ceiling with a loud bang reminiscent of fireworks. Just as when Hajime didnt have more shock to give, a whirling cascade of stars and planets hung above him, comets zipping about at every corner of his gaze. It seemed he could almost bathe in its ethereal glory for a hundred lifetimes or more. Much better than in the movies, as his younger self would agree. Weep in happiness, young master, said Harald. I assure you right now that there is more to life than just the horde, and we need your help. 10. The Ship That Sailed the Stars Hajime, more than delighted to know what could be out there than fighting the horde, asked the king an important question about the exotic designs of bathroom stalls in different worlds. He didnt care if Farkas and Paulie gave him a wide-eyed glance. There had to be endless designs. Yes, actually, said Harald, snapping his fingers again. Now that Ive shown you the vastness of our reality, how about all you three follow me back to the Chamber? Ive prepared for this moment just for you, young master. He chuckled like a con artist slipping past the authorities. If he had to explain why, it would be that exotic bathrooms were just the tip of the expectation iceberg. There could be creatures the size of Africa swimming across endless oceans. There could be sword masters with enough strength to cleave mountains. Anything was possible. But if he were brutally honest with himself, Hajime needed to ask one more thing: the existence of distinct rule systems for every world. It seemed too far-fetched and specific, but curiosity washed over his face when he waited for the king to nod in confirmation. They could be the same turn-based mechanic over and over for all he cared. Harald gave him a subtle smirk on the side of his lip, hands behind his back with a tilt in his stature. Surprises dont need explaining, young master. Come with me and see for yourself. Hajime cracked his knuckles, longing for an adventure worth every fight he faced, even back in his first chance in life. All right, lets go full Beatles on this bitch across the universe and beyond!
It was a fascinating surprise, even for his friends. Hajime had walked at his leisurely pace around the lobby, killing time by the decorative Newtons cradle as large as a cottage. He admitted to himself that the weight of each metal ball could crush a diamond in between, and if it werent for his unnatural might, the momentum alone wouldve sent him flying into the sky. Man, its like Im holding a baseball, said Hajime, tossing one of them high in the air in a spin. Hey, Farkas! Do you remember what you were gonna tell me? Right before that Hildebrand bastard showed up? Farkas closed his book about cat anatomy and stood from the red velvet couch in the corner. It mustve been softer than any cloud, but he obliged to respond, Oh, yes, about your dormant lightning below level 1. You see, dude, its a sign that a player is becoming more with the game. Becoming what now? he raised an eyebrow, ignoring the room-shaking clang he created upon dropping the ball. On a humorous note, he realized a different side of Paulie, who shrieked like a shower victim in a slasher film. Farkas laughed at the scene before clearing his throat for another exposition that Hajime absolutely wouldnt mind by now. Theres an old saying around these parts: Our life is the horde. The horde is our life. Its a bit clich, but thats what players are. The more we fight, our innate skills manifest in small amounts. Hajime raised both brows this time, recollections of their eating contest playing in his mind like a vivid motion capture of every decision he had made. Born to fight, his grandfather once praised him during karate class, but his parents thought otherwisebeing born to love. If only that were possible in both worlds. Perhaps the best middle ground was to be born to fight for fun and to love fun. He hummed to collect his thoughts, scratching his head with minimum effort. Okay, so we really are superheroes, huh? Well, yes and no. I mean, no, not really. We could be Oh, come on! said Hajime with a long chuckle. What do you prefer? Wizards? Sorcerers? Leprechauns? If I have no staff, I may as well wear spandex tomorrow. Actually, I was about to say mages. It seems more fitting other than the word player. Nah, were deadass superheroes, amirite, Paul? There wasnt much productivity made when Paulie joined in the argument. If anything, it devolved into the idea that players were more like witches and paladins. The air filled with a mix of banter and discord, mostly on Hajimes side, as he couldnt tolerate the slander of his favorite flaming skull anti-hero. However, beyond anything they couldve foreseen, a voice demanded, Settle down, gentlemen. Without a doubt, it was Haralds infamous Voice of Unreason, reaching hundreds of decibels straight to their ears yet always with the divisive softness of his words. Your voyage is ready, he said, walking closer. I hope its not too shabby.If you discover this tale on Amazon, be aware that it has been unlawfully taken from Royal Road. Please report it. The thrill within Hajime could no longer settle, not that his friends didnt feel the same. According to the Coffee Digest, only a member of the Seven Miracles and their parties could partake in what they called reality trips, a term he once thought meant going around each district with cameras rolling everywhere. He thought of several surprises the king had in store for them. Their voyage could be an intergalactic cruiser with access to infinite hyperjumps. It could be a ship mounted with plasma cannons that could melt asteroids. It could have a design fit for a space opera franchise that anyone could return to on a Sunday evening. Feast your eyes on this baby, said Harald, his hand reaching for his pocket until the moment of truth. Gentlemen, I give you the Spruce Goose! It can carry two hundred passengers from the [Ambrosia Cluster] to the [Dotted Rings] in seventeen minutes! When one held their expectations too high, it entailed a spirit-breaker that would last a century. What the king presented them shouldnt even have the luxury as a jokea wooden plane model no different from Earths 1940s period. It didnt even have the slightest paint or varnish. Hajime gave him the look of an unimpressed judge in a court ruling, more amazed at how he yelled it out loud in joy. Are you serious? he asked, raising his hand at the one object of mediocrity he had witnessed all day. Why, yes, I am, now hop in. This mission was for my good friend Andreas, but Im afraid old age has caught up with him. Even for someone like Harald, possessing abilities beyond human imagination, there were limits on what he could expect from him. But as his father once said, you should trust the words of respected leaders when in doubt. Thankfully, his mind thought of a different scenario that seemed much more reasonable than he realized. With the model on a table, he raised his foot to enter the stairs, easily dwarfed by his pinky toenail. But before he could doubt the king any further, a stream of pixie dust washed all over him in a flash, and to say it was like getting whisked into a wonderland would be an understatement. He hoped his friends would follow suit shortly after because his predictions were correct. Hajime stood before a place he could only describe as a glorified recreational room. To think that plane models could house so much space with the power of imagination. It might not have been the wonderland he hoped, filled with pantries of wagyu filet mignon in every corner, but it did have a pool table. The smoke room and mini fridge were also a welcome addition. He gasped at the spectacle he fell in love with in seconds, dragging his touch on the lacquered walls of tan and brown. Jesus. The guys got some style, for real. I agree, said Farkas, caressing his chin, though Im not keen on the 60s aesthetic you earthlings may know about. All the portraits are just pictures of fruit and celebrities with weird colors. Nah, Id say its perfect, but I bet Paul here would rather want rugs made of you know Hajime laughed at his own joke if it meant doing it louder, turning toward Paulie if he would agree. Luckily, he got his answer with more laughs from the two of them, with Farkas going as far as to claim coyote skin would be better. The cockpit was also unique. It had no windows to speak of or even a control panel, merely noticing a lone CRT television about the size of three Paulies if that made sense to them. It didnt take long for the screen to turn on in a static frenzy for a few moments until they saw the kings face on a pitch-dark background, the graininess of it all being the perfect touch. How are you feeling, my subjects? asked Harald with a smile of sunny days to come. I wanted to emulate the Lupinian spirit at first, but there was only so much wood and fur I could work with. Hajime chuckled, picking his ear like an ungroomed primate once more. Top notch, honestly, and I can assure you he doesnt care much about his home anymore. Well, thats a relief. Anyway, Ill tell you all about your mission along the way, but I must explain why youre here in the first place. Its only fair since I seldom choose any player for this outside the Seven Miracles. Fire away, Your Not-So-Majesty. Ill show those bastards what it means to own your pride with every punch! All right, where to begin Harald paused for a moment until his gaze lit up in recollection. As it stands today and as it always had been, the horde never rests, even on other planets. Other planets? Yes. The game we find ourselves in is like a virus, spreading across the [Ambrosia Cluster] and many other realities, so I want you to picture this: billions, even trillions of bloodthirsty creatures invading every petri dish of life to the next. Tell me, young master, have you ever wondered why you have such inhuman strength even in what the game calls your [Unpowered Form]? Um, because were just that awesome even at level 0? said Hajime with a tilted shrug. Its because barely any other world can prepare for even a thousand slimes that would be trivial to our fists, and believe me, Ive seen different rule systems come and go. I remember when Aaron and I went on a mission in the Hajime had a tight squint in his eyes as the king continued, fixated on the idea that so-called rule systems could be different on each planet within the galaxies looming over their heads. Perhaps many of them had turn-based systems against an enemy always on the move, a relentless force until there was nothing but red-stained brutality across the land. But as your people say, not all hope is lost, Harald pointed. Some can still fight the initial stages of the infection, and your help is more than needed. Since we locked Clovis in a cell until further notice, I shall assign this mission to you and your friends. Youre about to plunge into a world dominated by experience points, skill trees, and dual wielding: Swordland. 11. Jai Guru Deva Om The voyage was about to set course. Hajime used to believe in a form of outer space filled with nothing but white dots in a neverending void. In fairness, it did seem that way when he and his friends waited until dusk went by. Harald mustve had his reasons, but the grueling itch in his mind as to why began to take over. Bruh whats taking so long? he said, refilling his second brandy at the planes mini bar section. I cant imagine you not being able to just toss us into another galaxy with one hand. Harald giggled at his remark that lacked any semblance of respect for even a figurehead like himself. Frankly, young master, I admire your sharp tongue. Cant say youre wrong because I cant aim well in broad daylight. It was a surprise on Hajimes part. The king made it sound like he needed to throw the Spruce Goose as though he had participated in a national dart competition. Indeed, the universe would probably overwhelm the scope of his human intellect for a lifetime, but he didnt want the white dots idea to come true. Disappointment was unwelcome at this point. He could only guess Harald wouldnt wish to disturb the sunshine hour of every Agriman with the dead of night in a snap. The king needed to wait, but it wasnt out of the question for him to acquire vision rivaling the Hubble telescope. So many headscratchers hung around his thoughts, yet he still asked Farkas for another shot. You gotta put more faith in Our Not-So-Majesty, dude, Farkas suggested, preparing his glass for another clink for the three of them. If I didnt know any better, you and him have a similar wavelength. Hajime sprayed his drink on the counter, trying not to burst into laughter like he had heard the worlds most side-aching joke. Hell fucking no. Okay, maybe a bit, but I take offense to that very much. A kings a king no matter what, and aint none of them ever gonna tell me where to eat or move for long. Whats that supposed to mean, exactly? Authoritys a bust, man, and lets just say I never bent over for no pig-in-blue back home. And I know what youre thinking: why am I here eating peanuts with you til we reach Swordland? Because fun often calls for me, and fun is always free. Farkas squinted ever so slightly as he poured their third shot. I see. You dont seem to be the type whod start a revolution overnight when were not looking, but you still stick to your guns. Youre quite an odd one for that, honestly. Oh, I would, turning everything upside down and shit, chuckled Hajime, shining one pearly white grin for the journey. Listen, Farkas, I dont give a fuck if hes in my thoughts again right now, but I had two friends who said the same thing. You know what I did? Um, turn them away because they didnt think like you? No, of course not, he emphasized. I hooked them up, kisses and all! They didnt think I could do it, but fun is unpredictable, too, so mark my words. One day, Ill give something back to the people, and I call it Hajime knew their conversation would halt from another interruption from the king, but it wasnt a case of Harald careening toward the screen like a cheap jumpscare. Instead, it showed them a camera view of the starlit night twinkling at every corner of their gaze. Frankly, he never knew Harald had shaky hands, so much for the power of imagination. He noticed the rising levels of childlike excitement from Paulie, of all people. Farkas could care less besides tossing peanuts and cashews in the air for a quick treat. Nevertheless, the time had come for the Spruce Goose to hurl into space and for his eyes to feast on a myriad of Andromeda wonders.
Five.The genuine version of this novel can be found on another site. Support the author by reading it there. Four. Three. Two. One. Holy moly, great balls of fire! Hajime wasnt sure what potent brand of cannabis Harald possessed when uttering the final launch code, but he delivered it with the same grace in a tone that grew on him faster than he expected. All they could witness was space, space, and more space, thankful that the inhuman acceleration of gravity was more like a joy ride through a cloud. If he were to rate what he saw beyond the stars, it would make the Beatles write about their tears of joy, knowing that something across the universe could definitely change their world. Farkas and Paulie shared the same idea once they decided to do a karaoke tribute to one particular song, the alcohol in their performance slipping between verses. They didnt spare the chorus, either, if Paulie discovering a new language that vaguely sounded English was anything to go by. But Hajime wasnt one to judge, playing along as the constellations around them got blessed with vibrant gas clouds that stretched into every light year of happiness they would remember dearly. Even the word beautiful would be jealous. He wouldnt have cared about what Jai Guru Deva Om meant if not for Farkas bringing up a cacophony of facts in a slurred vein out of nowhere. According to him, the words had their roots in Hinduism, teaching about the victory of great minds over the ignorant. Perhaps one day, he might find himself saying those words alongside his pride, a heavenly balance anyone should strive for. Their voyage had yet to see its end. The Spruce Goose seemed to be a droplet in an ocean of colors, possessing and caressing their hearts once more. They could say it all shone around them like a million suns, which called them on and on across the universe. The last chorus couldnt have enhanced the scene any better than the twinkled wonders could. Across the universe, they went, and across the universe, they shall. Gotta hand it to you, man. Im glad you didnt pick the boring route for us like teleportation, said Hajime, sitting in the cockpit with his feet resting on a stool. Harald giggled at the notion, his face still encompassing half the screen. I wouldnt dream of it, young master, even in urgency. Really? What if the horde has already consumed all of Swordland as we speak? Horrific shit to think about, not gonna lie. Well, Im not omniscient if thats what youre wondering. Either way, Clovis people are strong, but youre stronger. Hajime scratched the back of his neck, leaning on his recliner to its most obtuse limit. Gee, thanks. Wait til they see me eat dragon teeth for breakfast! With milk, of course. No, young master, thats not a compliment. Its a fact. Your mission is more than just helping them against the horde with fancy lightning, and I suggest you dont do such things once you arrive. He raised an eyebrow at the king, even bothering to adjust the recliner back to its default posture. What are you getting at, man? Im no fan of vague, ominous warnings. very well, sighed Harald, eyes closed with a subtle shake of his head. I promised to tell you everything throughout your voyage, so listen closely. Whatever you do, dont level up. I cant fully explain now, but you can kiss their world goodbye with a zap of your finger. Hajime couldnt find the words to describe the slight race in his heart. It was still vague and ominous, but it made him recall when he watched an anticipated episode of his favorite show, where a sadistic conqueror destroyed an entire planet of humanlike aliens with primate tails. But something didnt add up, perhaps worthy of another question. Tell me, Your Not-So-Majesty, he began, if level 1 is enough for me to play hoops with the moon, why did I need to be twenty levels more to even damage the first boss? Unless youre saying the field is made of adamantium dirt, the physics doesnt compute. And what if I tell you it is? Will your eyes grow wider upon the revelation? You should by now, young master, that you wont be dealing with our rule system. The screen transitioned into a chaotic dance of static noise until it cleared to show Hajime the most peculiar scene of a different world. Amidst the lush meadows filled with dandelions spreading their seeds into the gentle breeze, two peopleone with a katana and dual pistols with the otherreadied their resolve against an unmistakable dragon with its mouth aflame. His friends couldnt agree more that it was a remarkable scene. The two young warriors had what earthlings would call health bars hanging above their heads, as did their foe. Every arching slash and pulsating blast appeared not so different from the pixie dust they knew, only that every hit left red marks akin to actual bleeding. But Hajime could care less about the fight, even when it became an elegant dance of otherwise deadly teamwork at every weak spot. He edged closer to the screen, focusing on the two young warriors alone. Haruto? Tokiwa? 12. An Unwelcome Guest Farkas and Paulie began rooting for the two warriors on the screen, a marvelous cheer for their victory as though they had watched a primetime MMA showdown. Hajime wouldve joined them in a heartbeat, but even as the fire-breathing menace fell by the couples hands, his eyes remained fixed on their smiles of victory. The dragon, its wings riddled with holes and its head severed clean, vanished into pixel nothingness. The screen returned to Haralds zoomed head faster than Paulie could cheer one last time. The king laughed in joy before wiping a tear on his cheek. Wonderful, isnt it, young master? Even other realms know the madness in killing foe after foe. Madness? That aint no madness of any kind, said Hajime, shaking his head like a biologist observing a new species. Its love. Thats what Light Novel Boy and Kendo Girl have always shown for each other. interesting choice of names. I suppose youre telling me youve seen this couple before more than youd like to admit. Hajime nodded with some foretold restraint, his eyes as earnest as a martyr without guilt. Yeah, they just needed a little push. I was there to see it all until our graduation. He picked up on Farkas footsteps behind him, possibly to ask if their small talk beforehand had become the most peculiar coincidence right out of a sitcom. Perhaps there was no point in hiding it. If he were to hide it from them, he wouldnt have gained as much as a cold, for sure. Even with a bravado the size of Jupiter, it was impossible not to achieve at least a few admirers throughout his previous life. Then again, if he did tell them from the start, theyd probably annoy him about it day and night and even at lunch. Paulie advanced closer, clearing his throat. Your Majesty, could you have known something about this, even if you say youre not omniscient? I havent a clue, my loyal subject, shrugged Harald. Clovis never tells me anything, and sometimes, I feel hes not even from their era. He couldve been a dinosaur, for all I know. There is one thing I should explain, however, apart from warning you again not to level up at any cost. What would that be? Clovis doesnt like visitors in his old home or more accurately, he cant stand them as far as he could toss their heads into the sun. Since Im a busy figurehead, the law requires that I say theres nothing I can do once he realizes. Stay safe, you lot. Hajime burst into laughter like he had witnessed the improv skit of the century. Behold, the king who had the power to mix water with oil and turn poppy seeds into chemo pills used all that divine energy to form an excuse that wouldnt even convince a grade-schooler. It was magnificent. He helped himself with another shot of brandy, suggesting his friends do the same as a toast for the mission that may include encountering slimes and goblins of the non-horde variety. With a unanimous clink of their glass, he uttered, Heres to you, you shameless bastard! Dont blame us for getting our shit kicked in because of your stupid test. No, I just wanted to fill some quotas for today, so dont blame me first when you return! The transmission ended with Harald doing a peace sign and winking like a pop idol toward their fans.
Hours had passed, but there wasnt a time when it became an eternity through space. Hajime would know. A game of ping-pong with a man the size of a grizzly bear as his opponent was more than enough to keep their spirits alive. Each swing from Paulie came with the sonic boom of several jet engines taped together. On the other hand, Hajimes swing came with the sound of one hundred tesla coils on overdrive. Even in their so-called [Unpowered Form], life seemed so fleeting when the ball moved at two frames per blur, according to the footage he wished for Farkas to capture. Space travels were temporary; souvenirs were eternal. Hey, Farkas, wanna switch!? said Paulie with a labored breath, struggling to keep up with the storm barrage despite his paddle whipping around in a similar blur. Lets see if your wind can disrupt his lightning. Hajime foresaw a hundred scenarios of pure fun on the idea. He tensed his grip, veins bulging twice their size, and with a perfect hit at the center, the ball sliced through the air in jolting mayhem. If Farkas could return the favor with a roaring tornado, hed be the happiest man alive for today. Luckily, his wish got better. Farkas swung like an MLB champion on roid rage, his paddle turning into a heap of splinters flying everywhere. The ball had lost nearly all its electric touch and caught itself ablaze toward Hajimes wide-eyed face. He gasped the moment it made him do a 720 backflip across the room, his head now punched into a mini fridge full of beer cans.Support the creativity of authors by visiting the original site for this novel and more. As though it were a cartoon in the 1940s, Hajime wobbled back and forth with the mini fridge still lodged in him. Whoa that was fucking awesome! he said, pulling it out with ease. I dont care if I didnt react at all. We should do this more often, man. The next session to pass the time was a game of foosball, or at least it wouldve been if not for the TV screen flashing again. He could only guess they had now approached the foretold world of experience points, skill trees, and dual-wielding. Swordland seemed like a hairs breadth away as his heart kicked into high gear over such wonders that awaited. Alas, the screen had none to give, and what it did present merely brought endless confusion between the three. Hajime squinted and uttered, What the fuck is that? Its a guy, I think. I dont know. Something doesnt look right. Yeah, I agree, said Farkas. It sure wasnt the king in front of them this time, but they indeed gazed upon a person of some sort. Half-naked with white pants, their complexion had an unusual pattern of red, black, and numerous other colors at random spots. It never seemed to mesh together, yet it didnt have the telltale signs of body paint. It was like their natural tone. Despite the stranger on the screen, Hajime couldve chalked them up to being a member of an alien race from a distant gas planet. Perhaps they had sent them a distress call from a million light-years away, but that didnt explain their other features that told a different story. The more he stared at their eyes, the more they transformed into lifeless white orbs with pupils as pale as a fog in a forest. Even their hair had this identity crisis of whether it wanted to be short, long, or medium. Frankly, the more he stared at all, the more a chill ran atop his spine. He never knew why, and neither did his friends. It just was. The entity before them opened its mouth ever so slightlyenough for Paulie to scream like in a game over screen in a horror title. In fact, horror was the best description at the moment. Hajime couldnt help but recall a tired trend back home of people sharing scary videos of fictional boiled victims. Still, it didnt hurt to hear what they had to say, and sure enough, it was just as cryptic: A flower doesnt fear death when it wilts, but what if it does? The trees wont miss it. The weeds wont think of it. Nature is cruel, and nature is existence, and existence is a flower my false heart will always resent. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The E????e???e????e???e??????e???????e???e??????e???????e???e??????e????e???e???????e????e????e?????e??????e?????e?????e????? After a long glitchy mess, the screen displayed the ships front and back again. All three sighed in relief from what seemed like an hour of watching a cursed tape. Unfortunately, as Farkas offered another drink to soothe their nerves, the control panel flashed red with the sound of what could only be the mother of ominous warnings. One by one, the stars behind them shined no more, begotten of a growing darkness that clouded their confused minds each second. Even gas planets nearby followed suit as though they were never there. Hajime looked at the screen, warnings still blaring until he eventually witnessed the source of approaching doom. Out of the darkness came a hand, trumping any human idea of enormous and encompassing. Hajime wished he never knew it was a hand if it didnt glow hellish crimson veins like pulsating on a burnt corpse. They stared at Armageddon, and Armageddon stared back.
{Welcome to Beware the Horde}
WARNING
Its stomach rumbles. Flee for your lives.
Farkas, his breath raced to its limit, sprinted to the control panel and tinkered with nearly every button and lever available. Damnit, how do I make this thing jump this time!? he said, wiping the river of sheer panic off his forehead. Youve done this before? replied Hajime, giving him space to collect his thoughts by any means possible. Yes, this isnt my first reality trip. Its my third, actually. There should be a jump drive button here somewhere. He put all his faith in Farkas, seeing how Paulie began having the trembling chills in a curled position. In fairness, the sweat from his brow didnt quell, either. If it did, hed be as good as getting crushed to oblivion by the encroaching nightmare. Every glance he took, no matter the rationale, his heart lost more faith in respawning. It just did. Even if their voyage were some space armada that could obliterate planets en masse, theyd still be flies escaping the swatter to no avail. The void hand reassured that feeling each second, but faith was finally on their side when Farkas yelled, Yes, I found it! Here we go! Faster than Hajime had blinked, the stars on the screen stretched like neon spaghetti as they traversed from one light year to the next. The lack of nauseating g-force caught him by surprise; he could do ballet with his fingers if he wanted to. He turned to Paulie for the great news in joy, but it disappeared once he noticed him pointing with the same chills. Guys its still after us, said Paulie before his face ran pale onto the floor. A brutal form of naivety was thinking Armageddon would be so kind not to take prisoners. Somehow, the passing light from the stars made the void hand even worsea writhing mass of deformed people with their mouths agape in eternal damnation. Those with eyes served as its veins all along, red and dripping, and before Hajime knew it, they screamed. What the fuck is this? What the hell is this? He watched on, trembling like a lone child in the dark. What the fuck are you!? 13. One World to Another Somewhere across the universe, in a meadow filled with dandelion seeds following the summer breeze and birds chirping in full melody, a couple spent their day off cozying under an oak tree. With their weapons at rest, it didnt hurt to have their hands intertwined for a little while. Cloud conversations were their main focus at the moment. Several topics had given them a few surprises and laughs, especially the story about a rookie warrior who tried slaying a [Cave Boar] with their starting iron sword. Their hide was tougher than fifty layers of kevlar, not that one of them describing it that way would make it less of a low-rank enemy. Did you hear about the recent reports, honey? No, but if its about how much everyone loves your hair, Ill gladly do that a million times more. Oh, please, dont make me laugh again. If that dude were here, hed call this world Blade Craft Online out of spite and mock how we look even further. Well, annoying as it was, Im starting to see why he said those things. So, what are the reports this time?
Hajime hit his head quite hard on the floor, or at least that was how he rationalized the aftermath of the nightmare chase throughout the cosmos. Whatever hellish creature it was, the mission became quite interesting. All he could remember in those last moments before lights out was yet another familiar snap. Motherfucker he said, stretching his neck until the crack of satisfaction. Thank God that bastard saved our asses when we needed it, right, guys? Guys? Awkward would be a grave understatement for now. Hajime couldnt catch a whiff of either Farkas or Paulie anywhere, even as he paced toward the bar section with a limp. He wished he could say everything would be okay like in the ending of a sci-fi film, but his salty-wet forehead told otherwise. He was scaredscared and alone. No. No, no, it cant be! With his heart rate matching that of a rabbit in heat, he raced through the contacts in his phone. He never wouldve guessed he had access to numerous players he never met, including not only the king and his Seven Miracles but a recent entry: the Lucky Strings. Curiosity got the better of Hajime, seeing how there was no way it didnt list his friends, too. Sure enough, his conscience proved him right, and he didnt waste time calling Farkas first with a mantra of endless worry begging him to pick up the signal. He didnt care if they were two universes apart; he needed to know. Come on, come on. Say something! A few more minutes passed, but his resolve had yet to waver until he heard the voice of an equally worried Lupinian uttering his name. Yes, finally! Jesus, man, I thought I needed a new team from now on. Same, dude, Farkas replied with a surprising clarity at the other end of the line. Paulie is with me, thankfully, but hes scouting the place we ended up in. Any idea where you are? Hajime chuckled in relief, returning to the cockpits seat. I was about to ask the same. According to these charts, the Spruce Goose is still heading toward Swordland. How about you guys? Honestly, its quite depressing. Everywhere I look, its all just empty buildings lying around. The sky is pretty gray, too, and the only plants I see are moss. Interesting. Dont get your brains eaten by the undead, all right? You never know if they can open doors. Farkas shared the laughter before calmly responding, Stay safe, dude. The mission is in your hands now, so dont make enemies everywhere you go. I wouldve loved to meet your two other friends because Hajime asked hello at least three times before the other line ceased in a glitching noise. Now that he noticed it, the sound pervaded the karaoke section and then into the radio. Fearing another chase from that foul entity, he checked every camera in the ship, including the bottom, but found nothing. Although his fright vanished ever so slightly, his confusion only increased. He did notice, however, that the front camera began to show an unmistakable planet of blue and green. The only difference between this and good old Earth was a phenomenon he learned in prehistory classa supercontinental green surrounded by blue. In other words, it was awesome.If you come across this story on Amazon, it''s taken without permission from the author. Report it. The noise in the radio began to disappear, and as though a virus had infected the device, it played a peculiar melody. It had an epic vibe right out of a TV show about elves and sorcery, but more importantly, the melodys title was too on the nose:
NOW PLAYING
Swordland - Yuki Kaijura
Wait a minute. I know this tune. Hajime caressed his chin, wondering why it took him ages to figure out what kind of world hed soon deal with. It came from a mile away, recalling the kings words about their rule system. It wasnt a melody fit for elves. It was fit for a lone gamer who suddenly mastered dual-wielding, the one term that stuck with him throughout the mission. Despite the realization, he tried his best not to burst into peak hilarity, knowing the two lovebirds in their inevitable reunion. If there was a pantheon in this reality, he could say the gods had a sense of humor. Oh, Haruto, how Ive missed you. You too, Tokiwa. Heres hoping your kendo has paid off. Hajime never liked the show where this track came from. It made him stick out in the NicoNico comments praising its so-called ingenuity, but it was nice knowing how many Western reviewers shared the same complaints. Then again, he might be a hypocrite and a half on the subject, considering the jackpot powers he acquired. Not many could summon a burger and cola at will, after all. Ah, thats the stuff. Hajime finished his meal like an infant without a bib. Thankfully, no stain of ketchup or mustard had befallen him, just crumbs and sesame seeds. He needed to be presentable for Swordland no matter what, but as he dusted his shirt clean, the radio glitched again. Several voices echoed amidst the grainy noise, but Hajime couldnt tell if they even spoke a single phrase of English. Looking back, it was strange how he gained such fluency in a tongue that gave him too many failed tests. Still, whatever they mumbled about, it only began to sound English in the end, albeit with a heavy rhotic accent. Dad, I told you! General Theo wants us to play the new welcome song. Poor bastard mustve thought we live in magic huts or something. All right, my wee lass, all right. I just missed the old worm in my ears, really. you only listened to it three days ago. And so, another melody played around the ship. Hajime never heard one note of it at any point in his previous life, but it had a pleasant, upbeat kick. The intro of electronic strings even complimented the clouds surrounding him, almost as if it prepared him for a place like no other. Once again, the title was fitting:
NOW PLAYING
Adventure of a Lifetime - Coldplay
He admitted that nothing couldve prepared the thrill in his heart anyway. Now that the Spruce Goose was out of the stratosphere, he witnessed what the lyrics would describe as everything you wanted as a dream away. The sky alone teemed with birds sporting a lucid array of feathers, only to fall prey to several dragons from below. It wasnt like they had wings for arms like many modern iterations. These mighty reptilians bore claws as thick as tree trunks on each of their four legs. Some breathed the iconic flame of mass destruction, while others breathed the same lightning that flowed through Hajimes veins. Suffice it to say he felt at home already. The sprawling plains and hills werent anything to ignore, either. Everywhere his gaze fixed upon, the land showed a vein-like network of rivers, glistening under the morning sun as his heart couldnt prepare again for what came next. He expected more palette-swapped dragons and maybe some unicorns, but not this. A turf war between lions, tigers, and bears broke out, distinguished only from their Earth counterparts by their fur of respective bronze, silver, and gold. The grazing wildebeest sprinted as far as they could, disturbing the fish beneath their hooves. Despite the reasonably ordinary creatures in Swordland, they all had a role to play. Hajime chuckled at the scene, the screen now zoomed to its limit. Holy shit, there are unicorns! he exclaimed, seeing a herd of them join the wildebeest. However, hed forgive himself for believing they were merely zebras with horns based on the stripes on their undersides. He began to understand a similar pattern with Swordland. Like Agrima, it had two mingling aspects in harmony. If Agrima had nature and modernity together, this world would have fantasy and mundanity. It wasnt entirely groundbreaking, but still a breath of fresh air nonetheless. The thrill in Hajimes heart didnt stop at any point once he zoomed out. In fact, his jaw might as well have fallen off. A white city loomed over the horizon, built around a marble sculpture of an arm wielding a blade, scraping the heavens with its tip. Oh, man, things are just getting more interesting. I cant wait to see their faces. 14. The Blacksmith & His Daughter The Spruce Goose landed on a thicket miles away from the river plains. Hajime could only imagine what would happen if he were to exit the door without caution. Staying the size of a caterpillar would forfeit the mission faster than a bird would spot his presence. Luckily, it appeared the king thought of everything. With one step, he teleported out of the wooden plane, but it seemed more like he got sucked out as though the air pressure inside remained the same in flight. That aside, he became person-sized again, as anyone walking by would tell him. It took him a while to realize the cobblestone road he found himself in, and his screen gave him another surprise.
Virtue Box v500.5.10
{Welcome to Swordland}
Class: Warrior LV. 1 HP 100/100 MP 100/100 Objective(s)
ATK 20 DEF 10 Meet the local blacksmith to acquire your main weapon.
INT 20 SPD 10 Complete the [Starting Forest] past the citys borders.
It didnt cause a sense of disbelief, thankfully. Whatever this Virtue Box program was, Hajimes herculean strength still flowed in his body, never fooling him for a second. But for the sake of finding out, he directed his hand at a nearby tree, and the initial grip of his fingers tore deep into its frame. Before long, all the roots were off the ground with as much effort as pulling a pencil from a jar, but before his thoughts could congratulate such a feat, another witnessed ita little blonde girl who presented a face of shock and confusion. She didnt appear to be the child of an impoverished serf, but he didnt expect a blacksmiths leather attire fit for a halfling. Hajime, realizing the tree still in his grasp, raced to fix the issue by replanting it with similar ease. Sorry about that. Growth spurts can still happen when youre older. He let out a nervous chuckle in a vain attempt to drive her attention further from the scene. It was the first day on the mission, and it seemed he already failed. The girl nodded, still showing the same face until she decided to do a hurried bow. W-welcome, warrior of light, to Coelestis: The City of Magic and Steel! My name is Mila, and my father and I will be your guide to this world for now. Your future glory is in our hands! Now, this was an even greater surprise. Hajime had yet to forget one of the voices he noticed on the ship, making for a fascinating clue for what was about to happen. Usually, hed skip tutorials and experience the gameplay blind, but to do that here would make him the god of bad manners. These people were far from NPCs. Hajime kneeled, smiling as he asked, What are you doing that thumbs up for, kid? You sound like a Scotsman trying to impress the Queen of England. all right, Im coming out clean, sighed Mila, eyes closed. The general told us to say these things for any reborn hero coming here. General, you say? Where does he live? Right on top of the city, Ive heard. Hajime turned his gaze to where Mila pointed. The view was a hundred times better than before, with the white walls spanning the land, a barrier between nature and civilization. Oddly enough, he saw no medieval-style village on the road he stood on. Instead, there was a lone cottage not too far, its chimney bellowing puffs of smoke that told of hospitality and warmth. Hajime never thought he could piece every minute detail together in less time than hed figure out a crossword puzzle, and it wouldnt be his last observation. Thats your home. Youre gonna give me a sword. Yes, it is, and youre right about your other point. Mila walked past him, twirling a small mallet from her belt without much care. Follow me. Well have coneys for supper.Support the author by searching for the original publication of this novel.
Hajimes instincts were right on the money upon entering the cottage. It was as welcoming as roasting marshmallows by the fireplace. The living room brimmed with meticulous love for everything metal, yet it didnt give him a sense of being inside a torture chamber. The pet cat purring on his feet nearly made his heart melt, too. It was a blacksmiths homea loud and hearty one at that. Greetings, warrior of light! said a man toiling by the forge, sporting the same blonde locks and a moderately rotund physique. My name is Abram, a proud master of iron. I cannot wait to hand you your first step in becoming one of the greats beyond the stars. Your future destiny is in our Once again, Hajime laughed like a hyena watching a game show, wiping a tear in his eye. Easy there, soldier. Your daughter told me about your script. It needs some work, but otherwise, not bad. Despite his joy, it did seem he offended someone who got paid peanuts to say a few lines of flowery language. Then, Abram returned the laughter faster than he could utter an apology. It wasnt his first choice either, according to both their accounts. They even had a time when they told heroes to explore the [Starting Forest] for some quick experience points. Hajime smiled after sighing in relief, advancing with his hands inside his pockets. So, when can I use the straw dudes over there? he pointed at a row of training dummies that collected dust in their heads. Only after youve chosen the color of your blade, laddie, Abram replied. Its dangerous to go alone out there, after all. Move your finger down like this, and you get to choose what beautiful ore you want. Frankly, Hajime might have gotten himself into a bit of trouble. His motor skills got so used to summoning his virtual phone that he could do it while asleep. The fact it had a scarlet theme going on wouldve been more of a dead giveaway that he was as good as an alien invader. Thankfully, the Virtue Box app saved the mission again by showing Swordlands distinct opaque white interface.
Choose Your Destiny
Gold The color of wealth May your adventure bring bountiful nights never forgotten.
Silver The color of purity May your adventure bring everlasting peace unto a land of darkness.
Red The color of strength May your adventure bring vigor to those locked in ancient battle.
Blue The color of serenity May your adventure bring endless hope in times of need.
White The color of righteousness May your adventure bring a new age of leadership and guidance.
Black The color of dominance May your adventure bring a world that knows greater power for the greater good.
Hajime caressed his chin, humming like a customer holding the line for hours. Nearly another minute passed until he smiled with the imaginary light bulb above his head. All right, I want black! Abram and Mila gasped in unison, as expected. He didnt precisely know why, but it seemed the color had brought some dark history into their world, not intending the pun at any point. There were numerous possibilities, ranging from the usual tale of a hero-turned-villain to someone already evil deep within. Young lad, are you sure of this? said Abram with a sweat from his brow. Hajime failed to contain another dose of hilarity from his mouth. The idea hed become the overlord to trump all overlords was more unrealistic than a moon made of cheese. Im just kidding, man. I want red. Red is the color of every fiber of my being, of every neuron firing throughout my brain. Its the color of fun, and fun is always free. With him choosing his destiny, Abram encouraged his daughter to show improvement in her craft after many weeks in the forge. Hajime supposed there came a time when every budding blacksmith would take up the mantle of their superiors no matter how inexperienced they looked. Mila couldnt agree more as she twirled her hammer again with pride. Abram wasted no time starting the forge in a gorgeous blaze, but it wasnt what Hajime imagined. There was no need for a mundane lever or even a fireball spell; it merely ignited on its own with Abram pointing a long finger. What was more impressive, however, was Milas sword-making method. Mila wore no gloves during the melting process, tossing the coal with nothing but an iron rod that glowed piping hot yellow halfway through its length. In fact, he never thought shed suddenly dip her hands into the crucible without as much as a flinch. All he witnessed was a face of determination. A Dhia na lasair, thoir dhomh solas agus dchas! Mila recited those words a few more times before pulling a molten slab of the foretold hue, red as the blood that flowed from all walks of life. She didnt disappoint in the next step either, with every hit of her mallet leaving sparks rivaling Hajimes bolts. He might even argue she succeeded in terms of resolve. Abram stepped in beside him, arms crossed. Is our work fit for a man like you? Hell, no, chuckled Hajime, you guys are way outta my league. 15. A New “Humble” Beginning The raw iron bar began to shine the desired color as Mila continued hammering without rest. It wouldve taken the whole day without her assuring Hajime that the Whetstone family never knew the word imperfection. Just a few more strikes and the blade radiated an emotion within him, destined to wield it for good. He may be an outsider, but that aura remained real and alive. At long last, Mila finished his sword, forming an elegant hilt and guard like magic, but in fairness, it couldnt have been anything else. The curdled blood design of the guard flowed down to the hilt in a spiral pattern and ended on the dragons head, which was the pummel. The blade was red as it could ever be, yet he merely received a standard leather sheath they had lying around. So, what do you think? asked Mila, looking up as she wiped the beads of sweat off her forehead. Hajime examined the crafted perfection a bit closer each second. If he did it any further, it still wouldnt lose its luster, almost as if patiently waiting for him to deliver a decisive strike on an indecisive foe. But first, the sword needed a name, as the Virtue Box program opened by itself before him.
Name your main weapon:____________
A plethora of options whirled in his mind, but some were what hed consider as either beyond clich or too lazy. He could name it Excalibur, Durandal, or Gram and call it a day, or if he wanted something more unique, he could name it Hrunting, Gurthang, or ThunderCat. Eventually, he decided on the more macabre side of labels. Exterminator. It has a nice ring to it. Well, if you say so, laddie, Abram shrugged. Forgive me for saying this, but thats not as creative as you think. Yeah, but its the principle that matters. For one, this baby is begging to cut shit in half. I can feel it in my bones, said Hajime, sheathing the blade on his side. So, how about you do me a favor before we go to the [Starting Forest]. With pleasure! What will it be? Line up all your training dummies in a single file. Now, I know what youre thinking: Im so powerful that I eat nails for breakfast without milk and evidence. But you know what, watch me. I wont use my hands or even feet because itll make things slightly more interesting. Whaddya say? I say you talk big for a warrior of light, more like a warrior of short sight! Abram let out a hearty laugh, eyes closed before he nodded at his claim. All right, laddie, lets see what youve got. General Theo hasnt seen diamonds in the rough for a while. Dont disappoint us. Hajime chuckled, cracking his knuckles one finger at a time. You have no idea. The three exited the cottage together. Hajime thought he already prepared his heart for any other surprises in this world, but it seemed he never would. He witnessed more magic as the supposedly inanimate dummies began to hop gleefully out the front door. Perhaps he could say it was Disney magic, for lack of a better description. Before his demonstration, he performed a strange routine he hadnt done since his previous life, clasping his hands together with his arms twisted before slowly moving them to his back like a pretzel. Such flexibility was either godly or ungodly, depending on the person. The Whetstones leaned on the latter. Hajime readied his soon-to-be-precious [Exterminator], only for it to fly out of his hands on purpose, straight to the sky until it twinkled with the stars. One could only wonder what insanity plagued his head, but only he knew the answer, and it surpassed insanity with the literal use of his head. In a sharp moment, his senses perceived the world moving slower than molasses. He waited in that one sharp moment for the swords pommel to connect with his forehead in perfect alignment. Any miscalculation wouldve ruined the opportunity for good, so he delivered his promise without a second thought. The blade sliced through the air on impact, piercing each dummy like a bullet through styrofoam. Hajime nearly considered calling this technique the Headbutt of Doom, but originality was never his strongest suit. Perhaps the Whetstones could suggest a better name, but their faces remained in utter shock down to their chins. Dont act surprised, he told them, surrounded by featherlight wheat straws in the air. When I said I wouldnt make it boring, I meant that shit with all my heart. Mila shook her head, now rid of her priceless expression. She turned to her father with a smile that beamed confidence and excitement. Despite the lack of words between the two, Abram nodded and swiped his finger down. This time, the screen was blank and gray without explanation. Hajime asked again if the flashing screen before him meant he was overqualified for being a warrior of light, but Abram merely began uttering the foreign words that still perplexed his thoughts. Although it sounded fitting for a world like Swordland, it also sounded fitting for a William Wallace biopic. O dhiathan, foillsich an t-slighe chum mrachd, Abram repeated the incantation at least three times before the screen suddenly changed into a rather soothing hue of grass green.Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings. Hajime sighed a few mental reliefs. After all, whoever their mighty general was, only a village idiot would turn down a man like him. He might as well accept his made-up explanation when it was more fun to guess what awaited his ongoing experience in a different world with different customs. Abram closed his screen and erupted in hefty laughter, his peak rotundness jiggling like a water balloon. Congratulations, warrior of light. Youre the fastest treader to ever be promoted. Treader? said Hajime, scratching his head. The backbone of our world, laddie. Youll meet the general and others tomorrow at noon, but Im afraid were still not done. What makes you say that? Theo still wants you to begin your first journey at the [Starting Forest]. Its our policy, honestly, and why I chanted that spell. Suddenly, the ground trembled beneath Hajime faster than he could swear. A flock of blue, crane-like birds began to escape from the canopies of numerous trees not too far from where they stood. Although magic would obviously lead him the way, he still didnt expect a bunch of stones lying around to form a road piece by piece. Despite his demeanor dictating he should stash his hands inside his pockets without looking back, he waved to the Whetstones with thanks. He hoped they did the same before vanishing into the thick wood that stretched from one acre to the next. In his own words, the fun was about to begin.
The [Starting Forest] proved to be a more fitting name than Hajime gave it credit for. It was a tutorial, a level designed to know the ups and downs of Swordlands rule system, and it was just as annoying as any MMORPG. Every step he took with even the slightest twitch bombarded his face with pop-up after pop-up telling him how to kill a pack of [Grove Slimes].
10/20 left to kill
In fairness, these gooey bastards, different from the ones he got used to, put up a decent fight. They were nowhere near as durable, but their bodies were less like flexible gelatin and more like living water balloons. Slashing attacks made Hajimes [Exterminator] bounce the other way while dealing merely three points of damage. Luckily, as the tutorial had taught him, a well-aimed thrust killed them in one or two hits. Oh, great, Ill have to use Kendo Girls gimmick. He decided to go with an all-out slime kebab, even if he needed both hands for better precision. It was cumbersome and time-consuming. Then again, he wasnt like his old friend in any feasible way. Hand-to-hand bloodshed was his domain, not dashing around the place with ballerina finesse. Hajime leaped on a branch high atop the canopy for a breather. He couldve bathed his sword in a lovely massacre of NPCs with slightly janky AI, but it got relegated to even more thrusts. The least he could be thankful for now was that [Grove Slimes] were also masters of the half-assed jump, covering ground no farther than an infants stride. How disappointing. He rested his back on the evergreen trunk, making himself comfortable for a quick snack. People mightve heard about a triple-decker supreme, but such hamburgers seldom had full slabs of steak for patties. Scarfing his meal like a starved bear, he summoned a bottle of rum aged 15 years to perfection to wash it down for good. There wasnt much to do besides killing more enemies Hajime could do in his sleep. His [Exterminator] deserved better than this, even if it was the tutorial, but it made him realize something easy to miss, starting with the rather strange kill count in his objective.
50/20 left to kill
Now, that was unexpected. Flawed enemy AI was one thing; a supposed glitch on his semi-fake status was another. Hajime tried to rationalize it as the Virtue Box program acting up, but that idea flew out the window the more he toyed around with Swordlands menu. Not even the convenient virtual storage had any problems. Otherwise, his bottle wouldnt have vanished into pixels from his hand for safekeeping. His thoughts raced to the one thing left to do for answers. With his phone at hand, he waited for the dial tone to stop ringing in his ear like a sign of ghosts. Luckily, the king felt chatty today, even if Hajime had to sit through his newfound love for blueberry jam. Yes, yes, theyre delicious. Can I ask you about something? Why not? said Harald on the other line. This is your first mission in another world, after all. Even I, with my endless wonders, would ask many questions coming there. Yeah, but this is different. You better listen carefully, Hajime replied. All right, youre the boss. How often does Virtue Box bug out? Im seeing some weird numbers. Harald didnt respond for several seconds, perhaps a bit longer than Hajime would like to admit, until he finally uttered, Oh, dear Thats not the programs fault at all. We of the P.L.A.Y. have used Virtue Box for nearly five millennia. I was there to see its progress. Wait, five millennia!? said Hajime, almost choking on his second burger. How fucking old are you, man? No wonder you could do all that crazy shit before. Thats quite a bombshell, you know that? Let us refrain from topics that dont matter for now. Its your turn to listen carefully. As Ive said, the program isnt bugging out. What youre seeing is the result of the games infection. It sounds insane, but in other words, Swordland will become another instance of Beware the Horde if we dont act quickly. Hajime squinted at the revelation. He never thought his heart rate would beat faster than a rabbit in heat once again, the sweat on his face growing twice in size. There could be tons of fun waiting for him in this world, and if it were to fade from the interstellar map, there would be no fun left to relish. What do you mean by another instance of our game? he continued. What happened to the planets that didnt make it? Gone, goner than dust. The monsters we fight were far beyond their imagination, so please Their call ended in the worst way possible. Hajimes ears got assaulted with piercing screeches from below, and he knew them better than anyone. It was the same sound he didnt like whenever a [Grove Slime] perished. Eventually, the area fell more silent than a library, and what came next were stomping tremors as though the ground beneath him would split in two. Sliding down the tree, he steeled himself for the upcoming danger with a lengthy chuckle. It could be a land-based dragon or an obese mammoth with four tusks. Either way, he sensed more fun on the horizon with every thud and shake, and he wouldve enjoyed it if not for the untimely intervention. Hajime had a piece of cloth pressed against his mouth from behind like he was a kidnap victim. Naturally, even someone of his caliber slipped into a realm of dreams before he could protest. No this cant be happening. 16. The Unlucky Guild Still caught in a daze, Hajime picked up on several voices echoing around him. The sheer act of opening his eyes made it seem like they weighed more than bowling balls. On the other hand, his back was lucky enough to rest on a wool mattress of the utmost comfort. Where the hell am I? His gaze shifted up and down and even sideways, hoping he didnt end up in a sex dungeon run by some perverted hero. He could only discern damp stone walls, a few torches, and a table with what appeared to be sliced bread with noticeable dryness on top. Thankfully, Hajime reunited with his rum, ready to chug it down for the mother of drunken stupors. But alas, the voices began to ring closer to where he stood, culminating in the words of a supposed young woman expressing her relief at his current state. It didnt take long for his assumption to become true, albeit not in an outfit he expected. Feeling better now? said the woman, holding a torch that emitted enough light to reveal some of her features. Sporting a crown of short black hair, she had a full suit of armor with a green color scheme, and it wasnt a design fit for a sex dungeon. If anything, the scratches on her plates told of years of experience. Hajime couldnt find the right words for his gratitude. Or rather, he was still skeptical about the situation to say even the littlest of thank yous. Drugging people with the age-old chloroform method wouldnt exactly make them grateful. His mind agreed these folks had no class whatsoever. Still, it didnt hurt to respond with a raised eyebrow. Very funny, kid, he began. Whats next: will I have my guts rearranged when I doze off again? If your buddies crave to do the deed that much, why not ask? Ive got some experience. Im so sorry for what we did, and I swear Ill make it up to you, the woman performed a familiar bow that Hajime hadnt witnessed since his previous life. My name is Maki. Im a warrior of light just like you, meaning we used to live a different life than we do now. Yeah, Im aware. I suppose we Shibuyans are predisposed to become heroes in another world, huh? He chuckled, shining his first pearly white grin in Swordland, even if his joke sounded vague and boring. Actually, Im from Nagoya. Anyway, this is my guild, the Green Wolves. Feel free to make friends with us because weve been trapped here for quite some time, but at least we saved you at the last moment. Saved me from what? A nice juicy mammoth coming my way? Maki stopped short of answering his question as the tremors returned with a vengeance, rattling the room several times with dust and debris falling from the ceiling. Hajime tried reaching a hand before she stormed out of the door as fast as a criminal escaping the authorities. Not being the type to be bedridden, he followed Maki through a winding stair to a higher level. Admittedly, he underestimated the sheer steps he had to take, resulting in a few sweat drops across his forehead. But perhaps he should also sweat for a different reason as they climbed and climbed. Hajime witnessed several unhappy faces curled up in fetal positions on nearly every corner. Many, including several emaciated children, only wore the bare minimum of what anyone would consider peasant clothing, black and tattered with a fair amount of mold from head to toe. The scene had surpassed even his worst fever dreams. Unfortunately, It wouldnt make their unhappiness fade for his conscience to reflect on that, so he followed Maki with no further glances. It was probably heartless of him, but it made knowing about the situation at stake more urgent. The two finally arrived at the upper level of the underground base. Once again, it had a design not too far from a catacomb of despair as Hajime walked amongst torn mattresses occupied by patients with rusted armor and swords. Any one of them festered with wounds that would make a surgeon pass out. Maki walked toward a pair of double doors at the end of the room, guarded by a bald man with a dark complexion whom Hajime believed would give Paulie a run for his money. She held the hilt of her blade tightly before commanding, Take us to the surface! in a tone no less significant than the ongoing tremors.Unauthorized reproduction: this story has been taken without approval. Report sightings. Now? asked the man. Maki, were still planning how to kill the rest of them. For your sake, please give us more time before Just do it! Maki interjected, eyes filled with the telltale signs of a burning desire to protect. The man sighed in defeat before conjuring rune-like symbols in his hands. Please forgive us for her unruly behavior. Shes not always like this, he said, turning to Hajime with a regretful gaze. Without further questions, Hajime got whisked away in a cloud of pixels, but it wasnt the distinct pixie dust he knew back in Agrima, but rather a blue circle of mana beneath his feet. The only similarity was that it glowed in intensity before teleportation. Perhaps both games were more alike than he thought.
The Green Wolves, now in a field surrounded by trees that towered over them like skyscrapers, went on the move with light feet. Although Hajime never dared to utter a word as they crept through the woods, the adamant Maki kept shushing his presence. Still, the enthusiasm in his heart kept pumping no matter what enemy awaited them. He craved battle, and battle craved him. Maki raised a finger, and the rustling of leaves and breaking of twigs in their wake ceased altogether. She gestured for her guild to hide in whatever shrub and nook they could find nearby. He tried doing the same out of respect for the ongoing mystery, but instead, he stood in place for a while, suddenly met with a jolt on his chin. It didnt stop there as nearly all the follicles on Hajimes face began to experience a sensation not unlike the static electricity stored in a balloon. As the one human bug zapper, he would know of such sensory abilities. Oh, no. Those bastards are already here, arent they? What a time to be alive. As he crouched under the boulder, waiting for a familiar showdown on the horizon, Makis faint voice beckoned, Psst what are you doing? Get over here. On the subject of familiarity, Hajime predicted Maki would choose one of the boulders in the area as a hiding spot. Sitting beside her quietly as a church mouse, he chuckled at the inevitable absurdity they had to face looming over the ongoing tremors. Maki squinted at him, still holding her sword with extra prepared intent. Whats so funny? Oh, nothing, he replied, caring less about lowering his tone lest there was a fart in the wind. This is where I would ask, Would it hurt to tell me whats going on? but not today. My eyelashes have a gut feeling about what were dealing with, and its not the average slime you guys have grown accustomed to. how do you know? Maki loosened her grip ever-so-slightly. Just intuition, really, because the fun is about to get real interesting. Numerous trees began to tumble like dominos as the earth-shattering vibrations grew. Before they knew it, Hajimes familiar enemy emerged from every bush, hill, and stream. He could say they now had to fight a horde of slimes foreign to Swordland, not that he wished to elaborate for the sake of the mission. Only when the dust and debris settled did the Green Wolves plunge into the fray on Makis command. Interestingly, none of them tried going full melee against the gooey bastards, opting for a different play style he would describe as a sword beam frenzy. Some conjured a stream of ice and flame from their blades, while others performed crescent slashes of conventional energy. One slash, two slashes, and three slashes more, Hajime had already seen all there was to see. Unfortunately, their sign of victory began to ebb away in less than a minute of their assault. For such a low-tier foe back in his new home, a mere one of these bastards managed to uproot a lush acre of the [Starting Forest] into a wasteland of doom and despair in a single bound. Suddenly, the half-assed jump he chided the slimes for spelled the defeat of the woefully unprepared Green Wolves. Half the team already had their tails tucked between their legs, retreating in full sprint coupled with screams drenched in the hopelessness of their short-lived vigor. Maki, however, gained more than just deeper scratches on her plates, her breath labored, and her eye swollen like a tomato. Go without me. You know I can hold them off for days. As though it were a miracle, the gushing wounds across her back and even her dislocated shoulder reverted into a state of complete recovery. But Maki your MP meter. Its dangerously low! said her unnaturally tall guild mate, pointing at the blue status bar below her full red one. That doesnt matter now, Hagel! Tend to the others and let the rookie and I handle the rest! With a hearty chuckle, Hajime was more than delighted to display something within his mouth that was pearly and whiteamong other usual sensibilities. He hoped Maki wouldnt mind stealing her thunder with his own real version, witnessing three slimes leaping high into the air directly at their heads. Just a bit more shock and awe from his decisive uppercut, and the slimes burst into pale white slush, leaving dewdrops upon the leaves and branches above. Youve got spunk, kid. I like that, but dont go hogging all the fun, you hear? This bad boy is just getting started. He pulled out his trusty [Exterminator] for the dramatic flair he always wanted to show. Maki returned his undying joy with a subtle smirk on the side of her lip. Without a second thought, she readied her longsword engraved with its most cherished name that went by [Gleaming Shine]. You aint seen nothing yet, rookie. 17. Conflicting Virtues The world had slowed to a crawl in Hajimes eyes once more. He needed it against the ongoing slime wave that always seemed surprisingly cunning with their tactics. For the first time, he realized they could teleport around the place by disappearing into the ground like a melting snowman. In this situation, not even the electricity surging throughout his body hair could detect their movement, annoying as it was. But the battle wouldnt end in vain this easily, and the word easily couldnt be more accurate with the new counterattack he created on the fly. His footing became wobbly and unstable, prompting him to deliver a stomp full of lightning on their sticky heads, making a splash wherever he went. Since his mind devised such a diabolical scheme of pure fun, he decided that was the perfect name for this albeit situational techniqueStomp Full a Lighting. One, two, and a third time for good luck, the beast within smiled with pride. Maki seemed to return the feeling, at least in her own way. The power to reverse organic and inorganic material didnt appear suited for mass destruction until her blade made contact with their nonexistent faces. One hit and the gooey bastards vanished into thin air as Maki exclaimed every successful kill with a smile. Theres no time to waste. We must slay them all now! she said in front of Hajime, catching her breath. I hear you, kid, Hajime replied. Pardon me for saying this, but if you guys have been trapped here for God knows how long, why are you carving them up with no sweat? Its much harder than it looks. Maki tightened her grip with both hands, eyes beaming with the revolve of a knight of old. These things, wherever they come from, multiply beyond our wildest dreams. Look! There are five more already. I dont know how they got into our world, but theyre far more vicious than any old slime I fought. Stay close. Well, lucky for us, my hands dont discriminate toward amorphous beings with unnatural birth rates. Theyll all be literal toast before dusk, and well have a wonderful Hajime bit his tongue, ending his rousing speech as soon as a damning recollection echoed within him. It was the kings words, which grew louder the second time: Whatever you do, dont level up. How foolish he was to forget he wasnt in a grass field home to countless monsters he could zap to oblivion without consequence. And yet, for reasons hed prefer finding out later, his goosebumps almost seemed like they told him that he already slaughtered twenty Horde slimes out of fifty. Suddenly, he missed the Swordland variety much better than before, not helped by the Virtue Box screen popping at the most inappropriate moment.
LEVEL UP
Class: Warrior LV. 2 HP 110/110 MP 110/110 Objective(s)
ATK 20>25 DEF 10>15 Meet the general of Coelestis.
INT 20>25 SPD 10>15 Engage the general in a duel (optional).
Whats wrong, Hajime? asked Maki, lowering her sword to the ground. Hajime? Hajime shook his head, returning to the present in a near daze. He gave Maki the only face he could give her: shock and anxiety. With even more beads of sweat running down his forehead that day, he uttered, We need to retreat. Now.Support the creativity of authors by visiting the original site for this novel and more. Retreat? But were doing so well, and you leveled up before I did. No, were not! Hajimes gaze darted at her presence before he finally found the perfect, if cruel deception, for the sake of the mission. Your MP meter has gotten too low. We must call the others to fight. I know youre not that type, but youre not the first headstrong motherfucker in my life who does things solo. T-thats not true! said Maki with a slight quiver in her tone. Youre here, arent you? We can defeat them together. Then, what the fuck are we standing here for? If you dont cooperate, Ill find my own way back to the base. He began walking a path downhill, the soil embedded with telltale footprints from the other guild mates. It wouldve been a breeze for him if he didnt find himself unable to take two more steps. No matter the effort he put into his stride, he always returned to his starting position as though gravity had punished him to stay in one place for eternity. Sure enough, he knew the obvious fact about his predicament, witnessing a Maki whose face scowled with quiet desperation. Maki moved her hand a few inches closer to the restrained Hajime, casting more runes in her palm. Im not letting you go, she said, positioning her sword behind her to send another slime into the abyss. I told you, rookie. You aint seen nothing yet. Hajime had eyes wide at Makis casual feat, given how she accomplished it with the tip of her blade. Still, that only meant he needed to push more buttons before the jig was up, even if he had to obliterate her spirit the same way he would for any slime. For the sake of the mission might as well become his mantra in Swordland. Look around you, kid, he began. Pretty soon, the [Starting Forest] will become a wasteland the more we engage without a strategy. We dont stand a chance without the others. Maki gritted her teeth with even more anger, nearing resentment each second. Dont say that! Dont you dare say that! Youre just like Theo and his lackeys: arrogant, well-off men who think peoples lives come cheap. Hajime chuckled, initiating another twist of the emotional knife. If thats how you feel, then you got me, I suppose. Im making excuses, whatever, but what about you? Are you doing this because you dont want more blood in your hands, or is your false sense of duty that fragile? Maki lowered her hand, the rage in her eyes fading into a world of confusion. What are you trying to pull? The children, starving on the walls. I saw them, he continued. Forgive me for even bringing them up, but youre all theyve got, and if we die a thousand deaths here, their next bedtime story is gonna be very fucking demoralizing. Did I mention your MP meter is too low? Im not hearing this. We fight whether you like it or not! Well, youre hearing it now whether I like it or not. Then again, Im still making excuses. Hajime wished he couldve added more if not for the distinct trembling noise under their feet. Without warning, an emerging slime catapulted him into the trees like a ragdoll, his spine collapsing into a heap on the way down. Hajime! said Maki, preparing her [Gleaming Shine] as though by instinct while sprinting for his aid. Sadly, fate wasnt on her side that day, with three more slimes leaping above her in almighty judgment.
Beyond the chaos continuing in the [Starting Forest], several hooded figures wearing crimson robes observed the landscape on a meadow hill. A lone oak tree on top served as their shade for the moment, the air filling with the screams of [Grove Slimes] massacred by their more violent counterparts. Such otherworldly mayhem and bloodshed, wouldnt you agree, brother Wedge? Indeed, brother Biggs. Even for this outsider, the disease they brought upon our world has spread too greatly. But not all is ever lost. This is what the Sun Child wants, and we shall serve his will until the day of his incandescent return. But brother, why must we make foes of the capital? said Wedge, his sleeves tented. Why shant we band together under the yellow light against these foul beasts from the depths of purgatory? If we ought to be martyrs by birth, reconcilement should be our obligation. Because they know not of the light we so cherish and protect. They only know the brute insolence of their weapons of cold steel. Biggs turned to his comrades and separated his connected sleeves with arms raised sideways. The time is now ripe, my loyal siblings! Let us chant our last prayer before we march to our salvation! Across the meadows were more robed figures following the same gesture like an army of androids devoid of individuality, even forming a rippling effect with their fabric on every corner. Fittingly, the sun had shone its brightest that noon despite their hoods remaining intact as they stared at its glory. O radiant Father, deliver us from the end of creation and into your everloving bosom. O radiant Mother, send us the dove of our deeds and do away with those who shun your everlasting mercy. O radiant Child, give us the land flowing with fruit and honey in the hour of your everblooming bounty. In true cult-like fashion, the robed followers repeated the prayer more than anyone sane could count. Some even began to raise their tone to the point of singing the day of reckoningexcept for one individualwho instead belted out an upbeat alternative rock tune that would fit right in with the 1970s. It escalated further in what seemed to be the chorus. Oh, oh, oh! I got a love that keeps me waiting! sang the man louder, snapping his fingers with a tap on his foot. Even as their eyes turned to him in sheer perplexion of his racket, he responded with a mere throat clear. Sorry about that, gents. Nows the hour of your downfall. Before anyone knew it, the man presented them with two engraved pistols concealed on his sleeves. There was no explanation, only stacks of cultist corpses throughout the meadows. Sheesh These guys are more resilient than I thought. Wait until Tokiwa hears about this. 18. A Light in the Dark Hajime never expected to wake up in the same dimly lit bedroom again. His friends wouldnt hear the end of it if their voyage went smoothly, so perhaps it was for the best it didnt. This world needed a competent warrior of light, a paragon immortalized in the books, not an airhead who let measly slimes get the better of him. Surprisingly, he didnt catch a whiff of any more crusty bread on his table, appearing to be beef and peas on a wooden plate. All that was missing now was his good old rum still inside his inventory. Virtue Box never failed to emulate every necessity for a Horde players reality trip. Still, he had to make do with only twenty available slots. The potential for it to become a nuisance in the future loomed over his head until a cacophony of noise echoed outside. They were the voices of the Green Wolves, begotten of an argument that grew worse in tone and language each minute. Some even resorted to speaking their native tongue, which had grown on him admittedly. The winding stair didnt seem that bad, after all. It took Hajime a small flow of his power on his feet to cover the entire flight of steps as though he had become the master of instant transmission, a term he always loved in his favorite show. Unfortunately, the starving children on the walls had become more of a twig than any anorexic supermodel. The voices led him to the double doors once guarded by the tall man, Hagel. Although he was thankful for remembering his name the first time, it blared on the other side, coming from a few distraught members. He didnt even make the doors creak open, yet his ears could now choose whether to detect an ant crawling beneath his feet or their ongoing discourse. Hajime discerned a few words, starting with Hagel shouting, No! We must go with this plan. Do you want to end up like Maki and the new guy? We hide, outrun them, and hide again, simple as that. Theres no point slaying one of them when twenty more will come for our heads! And thats the superior strategy you guys came up with!? said a member, his cape swaying as he pointed a long finger. These things can track our very scent. I say we give all that weve got or die trying! Amidst their disagreement, another member protested, They outnumber us in the thousands, you moron! What are you gonna do: make target practice out of them with your tiny revolver? Well, at least Ill do better than you twirling your staff one fireball at a time, coward! You take that back! Make me! Hajime decided to go inside, even if the scene wasnt the prettiest. The two members began crawling on the table to sink their teeth at each other, now at the mercy of desperation and anger. Hagel quickly broke up their quarrel with his broad hands with what appeared to be little to no effort. The room went silent in his presence to the point a drop of water from the crumbled ceiling sounded more like two drops. Perhaps that was the perfect analogy of the Green Wolves and their situationa guild crumbling to one of the most feral attitudes known to humanity. It helped no one, but it was impossible to resist. Geez, guys, even I could never hope to be this violent, said Hajime, stashing his hands inside his pockets. Wheres Maki? Hagel loosened his grip on the two members and bowed at a nearly forty-five-degree angle, befitting his size. Im sorry you had to see that, mister. Ive heard from her that your people often apologize like this. Well, youre not wrong. Just dont overdo it like you are now. Anyway, where is she? Hagel stood straight, showing a face of slight embarrassment before pointing toward the exit. Shes in her room past the hallway to the left. I must warn you, however, that shes not in the mood.This text was taken from Royal Road. Help the author by reading the original version there. Good. Why would she be? If you heard a quarter of what I said to her, youd despise me, too. What do you mean? Maki didnt mention anything that happened on the surface. We found both of you choking on your own blood. Hagel presented his hand, conjuring runes over a few scars. I never teleported people this fast in my life. Those creatures almost got me, but it was urgent. We even thought wed never see her again. Okay, so whats this about? asked Hajime, scratching the back of his neck. Well she just yelled at us in tears. We didnt fully understand what she said, but it was something about our fate now written in this place that wont hold for tomorrow. Weve never seen this side of her. Oh, I think you already did when she told you guys to jump out in the fray. Ill see what I can do. Hajime turned to the exit, his hands still in his pockets for no reason other than thinking it made his Hawaiian shirt slightly more fashionable. Thanks for the meal, by the way. The kids loved it.
He walked at his own pace toward the desired location, ready to knock at a dilapidated door with a tarnished copper knob. It had a note in front, written in Swordlands language, which, according to the universal internet on his phone, turned out to be interchangeable with Scots Gaelic. He was surprised the only difference was their non-Latin script, which appeared more like Arabic mixed with Thai. The words roughly translated as Do Not Enter or Die like it was an angsty teens bedroom. Without further ado, he knocked thrice, hoping to get a response without needing to wait for eternity or give up altogether. Thankfully, Maki spoke after only a moment, but it wasnt pleasant. Go away, Hagel! I dont want to hear any more of your stupid plans! said Maki, still not as muffled as Hajime expected despite the thick walls between them. Its over. Were done for. He chuckled, shining a pearly white grin, even if their circumstances were beyond grim. Then, how about a chat with an arrogant rookie? he replied. Hajime? Maki opened the door to sneak a peek, eyes showing years of misery and sorrow. She let him in without another word, her armor resting on the corner. Hajime sat on the foot of her bed while Maki returned to curling into a fetal position. Even as he witnessed more and more sadness, he continued smiling as if his life depended on it. I guess you have a thing with black pajamas, huh? Its our uniform, said Maki, wiping some waterworks in her eye. It wasnt this tattered when we came here. Came here? Isnt this the tutorial level? What is this place anyway? Maki got out of her position and into a more relaxed posture, staring at a lone candle beside her. The general told us to find some missing children near the [Starting Forest]. Those sun worshippers have gone too far this time. We found them eventually, but we went face-to-face with an even worse enemy and sought refuge in this abandoned stronghold. Wait, why would there be a stronghold here? That doesnt make sense. Im as confused as you, honestly. In the end, we were happy to live another day, but Im afraid that ship has sailed. Were all gonna die, and its all my fault. Hajime caressed his chin, wondering how someone who massacred slimes with a smile would suddenly be reduced to a pile of anguish. You seem quite down in the dumps right now than before. What gives? he asked with a bit of confidence. Its easy for you to say, Maki wiped another tear. Do you know how long weve been trapped here? Um, ten thousand years? One metaphorical nanosecond? Five weeks five weeks of accomplishing nothing. The worlds completely forgotten about us, so we might as well have our last dinner while were at it. Maki took a swig out of a liquor bottle resembling whiskey, merely stopping when it was half empty. Here. Its disgusting, but it numbs the pain of an empty stomach. Hajime refused politely, if only because such a scenario would happen to him later than sooner. What if I told you I can summon Big Macs whenever I like? Will your last dinner become slightly more palatable? Maki emptied her bottle, staring at the candle again, which continued getting smaller each minute. Yeah, right. Multiple powers are very rare here. Even my [Essence of Past] can only reverse a few things before my meter is depleted for the day. Why not just Incredible. Although Hajime seemed to be a genie in her presence, he believed everyone had an obligation to try its succulent, meaty goodness at least once. Maki snatched it from his hand like a capuchin monkey in a tourist spot, wolfing it down with even more waterworks flowing through her ducts. The average Joe might say it was a stroke on a bun, but this was a slice of heaven. What can I say, kid? he said, smiling with a shrug. Im no hero, but I cant just leave yall behind. After all, friendship doesnt happen overnight. Lets have a wonderful dinner, and maybe after that, yall can live five more weeks of happiness. 19. The Day of Freedom Hajime expected no less from Makis hunger, who asked for seconds as her tears of joy continued. It was messy, but it gave him more clues on how much her guild forgot about the word freedom. No one deserved a fate like theirs, and frankly, he reckoned not even the solar prick, Clovis, should go through their suffocating turmoil. As much as he didnt want to admit it, their base couldnt further deteriorate from top to bottom. Sooner or later, this place would fill with nothing but their bones, yet Maki showed him more smiles of joy and gratitude before eventually finishing her meal. Youre welcome, kid, said Hajime, standing from her bed. Well, I better get going and see if I can improve my burger creation skills. Maybe you guys would appreciate meaty sirloin steaks for patties. As for the children, they can choose whatever they want, no pressure. I merely hope it wont be too complicated or He couldnt believe his eyes for what his semi-fake screen did. It played a soft, uplifting tune by the Beatles without his consent, not that he minded the interesting selection. It was a song his mother adored in his preschool years, befitting its title whenever he needed her for sweet dreams.
Soul Melody Activated
NOW PLAYING
Golden Slumbers - The Beatles
He once thought he could just let Swordlands randomness occur at face value from now on, but it appeared this worlds bag of surprises was eternal. Better yet, the song somewhat had this hypnotic hold on Maki, suddenly embracing him with every bit of warmth and kindness she could give for the moment. Their statures were as different as the earth and stars, but he bet Maki had a heart the size of Hokkaido. Maki wiped her sorrows one last time, her smile illuminated by the candle on the table. Im sorry I brought you into this mess, but I gotta say, youre pretty good at gaslighting, even if you had your reasons. Why, thank you, replied Hajime, returning her smile with a slight chuckle. Anyway, do you mind explaining this shit playing around us? Or is it some latent power I acquired coming here? Thats nothing of the sort, Maki shook her head. Thats the [Soul Melody], a phenomenon in this world that triggers through means that are still unknown. I like believing its there to set the mood when things get intense or intimate. I suggest you turn it off on the menu. It gets quite annoying. Indeed, there was no reason for him not to believe Makis words, especially when the Virtue Box program began flashing a notification before his bewildered face about four new options to toggle the [Soul Melody]. He couldnt say he understood well enough why it had that many options in the first place.
Soul Melody Settings
ON OFF
ON during the day OFF during weddings and funerals
ON during battle OFF during speeches
Frankly, Hajime was as confused as the fireflies on the candle that appeared to have sensed the music in a frenzy, albeit because it changed from a Beatles classic into a Korn track fit for a mosh pit. All he could discern from such a sporadic shift in mood was that his inner child wished to find out if it enjoyed a bit of heavy metal. You must agree its kinda obvious, right? he continued. This phenomenon is in tune with our souls. Why it chose mine as its radio now, I dont know. Maki giggled back at him, eyes closed as she held her hands together on her knees. Who knows? Maybe its because your pride and gaslighting were so potent that its now deciding to make your day a little less peaceful. Hah! Dream on, kid. Fun doesnt know about peace until it earns it. Take these lightning bugs, for example, he pointed at the fireflies, still hovering in unpredictable patterns above the candle. Even they know the sheer joy of listening to Korn. Why else would they have such a fitting name? They love fun the same way I do, so you better Hajime might have discovered more than just an omniscient MP3 player that day, and it all had to do with the fireflies that continued to dance for another minute. Even as the room fell silent, his follicles tingled with a jolting sensation at their movement. The mystery intensified when his mind suddenly gave him a distinct number of how many hovered above the candle. It just did.Support the creativity of authors by visiting Royal Road for this novel and more. As far as his new dubious instinct could tell, there were twenty fireflies. Twelve flew in loops while the rest hovered in place, a prediction far too accurate for human sight alone. He needed to know more; he had to. With a wave of his hand, the looping fireflies increased to fifteen. Once again, it was an oddly specific number etched in his gut. Maki tilted her head at Hajime, raising an eyebrow upon becoming the bewildered one next. Whats going on? Are you okay? Hajime couldnt find the words to describe fully the ultra-perceptive magic thrust upon him. He could now even judge the distance between himself and the fireflies, roughly at four feet. Eventually, he realized what he shouldve figured out long ago when they tried slaying the gooey bastards. Whatever this power was, it oozed with a familiar zapping madness of his [Way of the Thunder]. Before long, an imaginary light bulb popped into his head, prompting him to say, I got it. This plan might work. Call the others for a meeting. They need to hear this. But why? said Maki. Because were finally getting outta here. All right, rookie. I wont stop you from now on. Hajime followed Maki at the same pace, leading several children behind them who beamed with joy for the bountiful gratitude he gave them in the form of a standard Happy Meal. It was time for the Green Wolves to ride into the sunset of victory, the time to bask in its liberating shine for as long as they still breathed. The meeting room showed another unpleasant scene, starting with a member conjuring icicles against their own at every corner. One retaliated by summoning miniature dragons that could melt stone with their flames. Even Hagel, a master of switching peoples positions in the blink of an eye, couldnt keep up with their destructive behavior. Maki responded with a lengthy sigh before raising her hand. Everyone, including her faithful lieutenant, ceased in their place until every instance of their strife in the room had become undone like a videotape playing backward. The round table mended its scratches, the chandelier returned hanging above their heads, and most importantly, the bruises of her guildmates faded to pixels. Thats enough, everyone, Maki advanced closer, her armor now gleaming with its former luster. The rookies got something in his mind, so we better listen. Hajime stepped in with a throat clear and took a deep breath in preparation. Ladies and gentlemen, I might have made an ungodly abomination of all your plans to escape. Please dont ask how I know what you said back then because we dont have much time as we speak. Hagel rested his ivory mace on his shoulder, his eyes keen and sharp. Well, go on. Okay, lets cut to the chase. As you may know, I possess this so-called [Essence] known as, um Lightning? Hagel hypothesized. Yeah, sure, whatever. Anyway, watch this. Hajime demonstrated the impossible, even for the average treader in Swordland. A common housefly buzzed around close to his ear, and his hand appeared to have vanished in a blur, pinching the insect as softly as he could. Unfortunately, there was a noticeable discrepancy in his blinding feat. But you didnt catch it, said Hagel, pointing at the fly that returned buzzing around without a care in the world. I wasnt trying to. Look. Hajime presented the Green Wolves with the one thing that made his feat beyond impossibility. It was the flys leg, cleanly detached between his fingertips. They exchanged surprised glances, as expected, but he needed to double down on the picture. Guys, please. I know this needs more explaining, but heres my plan The entire guild huddled together to hear his strategy, hoping they wouldnt miss any crucial detail that meant the line between living another day or ending up six feet under.
The great escape had commenced in the [Starting Forest], helped by a member with the power of near-perfect concealment without the need of words. Although moving in stealth in several locations, they were obligated to protect one or two children at any cost. All they needed was Hajime telling them red light or green light. Keep going, guys. Just put your faith in me, he said, carefully navigating the terrain with his tiptoes. I figured slimes are obviously blind and deaf, but they can follow us like bloodhounds. Luckily, thats where my barrier comes in. He tweaked one of the many [Blessings] he unlocked back home, appearing as a mobile force shield with a transparent gray tint. Maki walked beside him, whispering, How do you think this will help us? Not even Theo could stave off these things with his own barrier. His other abilities didnt do much, either. Its not about blocking them from getting nearer. Its about burning them to a crisp if they get too close. I dont know why it does this, but my barrier might differ from the generals. It didnt take long for one Horde slime to show up, chasing a Swordland variant before they both got the incineration treatment as promised. Reduced to ashes in less than a second, it finally gave the Green Wolves the trust they needed to continue. But time remained of the essence until they could see the tutorial levels beautiful exit in the shape of a wooden arch adorned with flowers and vines. Red light! said Hajime, sensing about thirty slimes wandering the area of mangled trees and crushed boulders in their wake. He couldnt take any chances, even if his barrier had enough power to stop the devil from entering. Green light! Freedom already seemed halfway near, but the sweat running down their foreheads had increased in volume. There was no telling if Maki would lose half her guild as soon as they reached the exit, a probable fate that wasnt very healthy to dwell upon. They could only achieve the great escape through their callous feet across tainted soil. However, in a terrible turn of eventsas much as Hajime believed in freedom through blood, sweat, and tearsa little girl on the very back tripped over a measly rock. Now outside the barrier, Maki sprinted again to her aid, but Hajime predicted itd be too late. The nearest slime lunged at the girl like any apex predator in the books, her arm now submerged in its corrosive mass down to the bone. Hajime had his heart drop to the planets core. No one could blame his face of eternal horror when the girl screamed as though she were no different from a gazelle. Eventually, the tears on her left eye changed into an unholy agony of gushing red as more of her half got absorbed into the feeding slime. Goddamn it! Hajime tried his damnedest not to throw up a months worth of lunch, but before he could flash through the scene, Maki had already beaten him to it. Frankly, he now knew why they had survived for this long. Maki gently laid her hand on the little girls nonexistent arm and restored every bit of tissue like a miracle worker in biblical times. Shhh There, there, its okay. The pain is gone. She continued to hug the girl before turning to her guild, filled with even more resolve for the future. Lets move! We are here to defy every step of the way! Without any more fanfare, Hajime shined a pearly white grin for the day. Fuck, yeah! 20. Two Lovebirds in Another World The crisp dead of twilight swept over half of Swordland. The Whetstones remained cozied up in their cottage, forever honing their hospitality if they hadnt already. It would be most inappropriate of them to be unwelcoming, especially when they had to accompany two guests who stopped by for afternoon tea. I hope its not too hot, young lass, said Abram, handing a cup in the living room. I never dreamed for the Brazen Couple to come knocking on my doorstep again, but that only means youll never forget a face. After all, Ive yet to find anyone else here who sports a full crown of lavender locks. Its unnatural yet memorable, wouldnt you agree? The woman laughed after taking quite a large gulp of her latte. If there was one thing the Whetstones realized something different about her since her arrival, it was her striking orange sweater. I could say the same, Captain Blondebeard! she said, finishing her drink. You better believe that my Haruto and I will remember you until we croak. Thats what heroes do best. No exceptions! Abram returned the feeling of amusement with even more heart, taking his favorite seat close to the furnace. Always with that hot-blooded attitude of yours, I see. If I didnt know you better, youd be an upstart little boy with a wooden sword ready to take on the world in another life. Oh, no, I dont think so. Id be a hundred times better than any of those fakers! Its like what my old friend once said: theres no better me than I. Yes, yes, I agree. Ive almost forgotten about your second job. I highly doubt any hot-blooded boy could handle it. This friend of yours sure has given you excellent advice, Tokiwa. I wouldve loved to meet them. Just as Abram and Tokiwa continued their conversationswitching to the topic of her knitting extra sweaters on a day offthe second guest stepped in between them with arms crossed, clearing his throat to grab their attention. Frankly, no one in the right mind would ignore the distinct presence of the legendary Red Gunman on any occasion. But since he and his headstrong fiance had some free time, he preferred his actual name for now. Not to toot my own horn here, but I believe someone who has seen many guts spilling over in the battlefield can handle anything, boasted Haruto, wearing the long leather coat that gave him his lasting moniker. Unfortunately, even as it swayed with the wind coming from the living room window, another dose of laughter permeated the air. Tokiwa giggled before taking a deep breath, smiling for what it was worth. Thats not the point, babe. Youre better off with me riding you in the sheets until you cant handle the pleasure anymore. Never underestimate my abilities, you hear? Ill always surpass your technique! She pointed a long finger at him, beaming with the charisma of an underdog hero facing an arrogant rival. Hah! Surpass? Your grip on me has grown weaker as we speak, Lightwalker, Haruto responded, carrying a tone of subtle yet unmatched loftiness. Why not train some more in the bathroom before you bare your hollow fangs? Oh, really? Then, how about you surpass this!? Without warning, Tokiwa pounced at her beloved as though she had teleported into his presence, now taken over by the intent of tickling him on the floor like no tomorrow. Wait, no, please! Haruto begged in a neverending cackle. No, seriously, I brought my guns with me. Please, please stop! Hahahaha! The chaos continued, even as Abram tried to tell them enough was enough. He couldnt help but laugh with them again, but in fairness, no one could blame him. After so many winters, the Brazen Couple remained more brash than their title could ever be, even when not counting the gratuitous innuendos amidst their love. Indeed, that four-letter word always remained hidden beneath their banterunwavering and powerful. Haruto retaliated against the infernal sensation with his own at Tokiwa, further escalating their battle into the kitchen as their bodies flickered in a blur around the place. Clearly, these two warriors of light were in touch with their inner child if such a thing proved to exist, but it was still love, begotten of their joy being with each other every day off. One of their screens was keen on showing more of that for the Whetstones.The narrative has been taken without permission. Report any sightings.
Soul Melody Activated
NOW PLAYING
Lovefool - The Cardigans
The Brazen Couple bid farewell to the Whetstones, the skies now blessed with a full moon surrounded by the constellations Pavo Major and Gruis Minor. There was a saying they symbolized a happy marriage if seen together before evening. Perhaps one day, Haruto and Tokiwa would come to appreciate this mesmerizing omen in the same spot outside the cottage. Holding hands with her fiance, Tokiwa tried reaching for the heavens with a finger or two, unaware that her head tilted at his shoulder. There were no words, only smiles worthy of their future in a land of steel. She did it a second time, presumably for good luck, until she gasped in her own realization and raced back to the Whetstones. Im so sorry for forgetting your birthday last week, Mila. Here, take it. Tokiwa handed a peculiar present wrapped in the shape of a bird. Now, you go be a strong, formidable girl your own way, all right? I know the world can be very harsh for people like us, but theyll never hear our voices if we sit and do nothing. Dont give in to the words of men who think your place is in their shadow. Mila nodded, clinging to her gift in silent joy. Thank you. Ill need it for the most recent warrior of light. Oh, yeah, the newcomer. Weve heard reports about them flying above the clouds into our world. They must be pretty lucky to have a safe landing. What do you think, honey? Haruto caressed his chin at the question with a prolonged hum. Well, I dont have much to say, he shrugged. If they can hold their own against an old-fashioned pistol duel, maybe Id take them as my apprentice. Tokiwa held a bit of laughter in her smile before she giggled again like a crafty trickster right in his face. Sure, babe, sure. I want to see how strong they are, how many boulders they can crush, and how far they can leap in a single bound! Because once I see some decent results, Ill also get stronger by fighting them! you know not everyone is a kendo freak like you, right? Well, you couldve fooled me with your knife skills. Oh, wait! Thats not your forte, is it, Red Gunman? The couple bickered for a few minutes, which appeared more like two internet buddies committing to the bit of their fabled reputations. However, amidst another playful argument, it all stopped as soon as a cacophony of unmistakably human screams echoed far within the [Starting Forest]s entrance. They steeled themselves for the worst without a second thought, offering the Whetstones their utmost protection from behind. I go left. You go right, said Tokiwa, unsheathing her silver katana inscribed with the name spelling [Crest of Time] on both ends. Haruto wasnt above Swordlands ancient tradition for weapons, either, even when his skill tree bestowed him with the rare ability known as dual-wielding. Works for me, he said, twirling out his pistols shining with the names [Huginn] and [Muninn] under the moonlight. Tokiwa opened a blank gray screen, usually reserved for casting spells to affect ones surroundings, from moving rocks to parting tsunamis. For this situation, she uttered the games native tongue, O dhiathan, denaich dhuinn neart fichead fear. As easy as it seemed for her, not many could fluently recite a spell for enhanced physical strength. Rumors had spread about the despicable sun cultists turning the [Starting Forest] into their secret base of operations. Along with the screams, the rustling in the trees reached a crescendo, prompting them to sprint into the middle of a battle, waiting to get immortalized in the books. And it wouldve been a battle that would have people talking for ages if not for the stampede of [Grove Slimes] driven out by fellow treaders coming their way. There was no doubt about it. By some divine intervention, the missing Green Wolves had returned from hell, rejoicing loudly in the word freedom one final time as they leaped out of the woods in unison. If there were anything to immortalize in the books, it would be the triumph of Maki and her guild, lying under the stars from the exhaustion of liberation. Not even the Brazen Couple had come to terms with the sheer miracle they had witnessed just moments ago. Tokiwa continued to stare at their joys of victory, wondering how they could get up in their wounded state, with their leader offering free drinks at a local tavern in the city. What was more confusing were the children following them like ducklings on a trail, each holding hamburgers out of the blue. Even as she blinked four to five times, the mystery surrounding them grew further. Haruto advanced closer beside her, stashing his pistols together. Its like seeing a ghost, huh? Maybe we should give Maki the flowers we made for her funeral. Yeah, maybe said Tokiwa, recollecting her thoughts. This doesnt make sense. Theo said she and her guild died against those robe-wearing dipshits. Why are they here? Oh, they died, all right. And now, theyre reborn, at least a second time, a third voice beckoned the couple on the cottages rooftop. With their tall figure obscured by the moon in a pitch-black silhouette, it seemed they had witnessed more than just ghosts that night but also an old friend. What up, lovebirds! Its been a long time. 21. Heartwarming Reunion It couldve been years, centuries, or even a billion millennia since Hajime reunited with the original Fun Trio, a name he hadnt even told Farkas and Paulie about. Still, anyone with half a brain would be delighted to meet his old friendsschool president Haruto Minagawa and kendo champion Tokiwa Aoki. All it took was one gambit between them, ensuring a relationship that would transcend worlds. For a time, people knew him as the Orca of Tsuru University, powerful yet cunning and unpredictable, but that moniker had long passed. Now, he was merely thankful that the reports about his arrival didnt reveal the mission in any conceivable way. Since their jaws still dropped wide open at his presence, he could only guess the surprise in their hearts. Are you just gonna stand there or what? he said, pacing himself closer, curious at how the Brazen Couple was still fifteen inches shorter than him. Eventually, they gave him a pair of smiles beyond any description of happiness. One might wonder how long it had been, how long their separation had gone, but he never expected their next move in a hundred lifetimes. Hajime! they cried in unison, forming a group hug that pushed him to the soft grass on his back in a flash. For a moment, they appeared more like two little kids missing their father from vacation than adult treaders. Although Hajime anticipated their flash-step technique from miles away, he might as well allow their happiness to continue, even if it devolved into a comical scene of Haruto blabbering nonsense with some tears. On the other hand, Tokiwa laughed with her tears, further cementing his suspicions that they never had another friend held as dearly in their memories as him. It was touching in every way, and he returned the embrace with more laughter. Haruto was the first to let go, rubbing his eyes for a small moment of clarity. Sorry about that. We thought wed never see you again. I couldnt sleep for weeks when your apartment burst into flames that day. You were all over the news. Did it hurt when you died? Tokiwa interjected, trying to hold both his shoulders for comfort despite her below-average stature. There was so much I wanted to thank you for, and I never got the chance. Hajime raised his hands, wishing for them to give him space to recollect his thoughts at the time of his admittedly morbid demise. Slow down, it was nothing. I didnt feel as much as a tingle when I turned to ash, but Im sure Mom was devastated beyond belief. Yes, youre right, nodded Haruto. How about we discuss more in our house? We live by the shore. The crashing waves are very soothing and perfect for any conversation. With pleasure, Light Novel Boy! Hajime replied, preparing himself for whatever wonders awaited him in a home possibly imbued with magic and whimsy. So, you guys have teleport crystals or something? Or am I talking about a show your long-lost twin happened to be in? You better Link Start my jimmies, baby! He hoped that laughing at his own joke at the expense of Harutos striking resemblance to a character he didnt like was still in good taste. Not even a stone-cold judge would ignore the bangs hanging between the eyes. Either way, Hajime got his answer from Tokiwa, who raised her hand to do the honors. Her screen ushered in various outlandish items, from what seemed to be dragon claws to slime jam, neatly packed in Swordlands scroll-down inventory mechanic. Here it is! she said, holding out her palm. The desired item materialized into a white envelope with a sword symbol. This is a [Door Mail]. It takes you anywhere as long as you write your destination. Now, that was convenient. If Agrima had a technologies division, they sure as hell needed to step up their game, not that hed show them his [Insta-Warp] card for the sake of the mission. Blending in was his objective at the moment despite what his semi-fake screen had told him. He waited for what this envelope could do, noticing the words HaruToki Residence written in front.A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation. The [Door Mail] didnt disappoint, luckily. In three seconds, it grew into multiple folds like crumpled origami until it became its intended purpose: a door. It had a surprising design, adorned with purple silhouettes of rose vines creeping on an arch with a birds nest on top. He couldnt help but acknowledge it was fitting for their love, if only predictable. Thats a neat-looking door youve got there, he said, crossing his arms as he observed a few more moments. Thanks. My Haruto thought of the idea. Now, lets hop in. Oh, and dont forget to say goodbye to Abram and Mila. Theyre super sweet! Hajime let out a hearty laugh, eyes closed, remembering the brief moments they shared. Oh, are they? In that case, Ill have to move my dinner with them tomorrow. He wasnt sure if the Whetstones felt robbed of getting to know the new warrior of light a bit more, considering it was their duty to help them learn the basics. Disclosing to them about what happened in the [Starting Forest] would only have them carry the unnecessary burden of responsibility. But after thanking Abram for suggesting another color for his blade, he thanked Mila even more for forging it in the first place, rubbing her head with a smile worth remembering for generations. Without any more dallying, Hajime opened the door. His ears met with the sounds of seagulls cawing on the other side.
Hajime couldnt say they lied through their teeth about their current livelihood. Along the sands of pearly whiteness the same as his grin, the waters glistened so clearly under the moonlight that it appeared safe to drink and even make a cocktail out of. Eventually, the couple guided him to a lovely three-story cabana situated by the shore, as promised. No matter how hard the waves tried to capsize their home, it stood tall with the same dignity as a millionaires villa, especially with its posts towering almost the same height. Walking up the stairs, he could already witness a sprawling infinity pool, which blended seamlessly with their traditional wooden architecture. Suddenly, he forgot he was in Swordland, reliving the times when his parents kept visiting Hawaii nearly every year. Alas, the interior was a different story altogether, with what seemed to be two equally different personalities in each room. One room had a wall of countless bullseye targets, more than in a dart-throwing competition, while the other was a glorified collection of bamboo shinai as far as the eye could see. Then again, these two always made Hannibal Lecter look well-adjusted in their obsession. Man, they need other hobbies. Hajime moved on to the next room, the living room, to be exact. Thankfully, it didnt assault his eyes with another lack of conventional design; it was inviting, in fact. On each corner were pots of miniature palm trees, and the green velvet sofas perfectly accented the unpainted floorboards, shining in an ample coat of varnish. There was also a bookshelf made entirely of bamboo, but he wasnt keen on them filled with almanacs of pistol designs and kendo techniques. Only a small section had novels of pure fiction, and one of them was quite the page-turner, his fingers guiding him through a story about a boy who forged the sun to fight the darkness. If only that despicable Clovis were as stunning as this child. Haruto entered the living room, carrying a plate of assorted delights, including the ever-so-important minced pie. Please, have a seat. We have a lot to talk about. You were the only one who understood someone like Tokiwa, something I couldnt see long ago. Hajime placed the book back where it belonged and paced himself around the room. Nah, shes got her own thing going on and owns it. I only wanted to know if I could hook you guys up: two different people from different backgrounds. But if I didnt know her better, shed be at my back right now with a stick ready to go up my Hiyaa! Out of nowhere, but not unexpectedly, Tokiwa roared from behind with a shinai in hand. He responded with his hand moving at a speed that no radar could ever hope to measure, the world again slowing like molasses in his eyes. And yet, with all that power, his fingers failed to get a tight grip on her wooden blade. He didnt fully understand, but the change of wind resistance on his back made him assume it swayed the other direction before the last moment. Undoubtedly, she was in the same domain of speed as he was, if not higher. Fortunately, since humans had two hands, Hajime switched to his left while turning around like an acrobat, successful in his flip. Sure enough, her blade wouldnt go anywhere soon, with a mere pinch splintering the tip nearly into sawdust. Smart moves, Kendo Girl. We really do have a lot to talk about. Tokiwa returned his excitement with her own grin, albeit with an aura of mischief no different from the manga protagonists they grew up reading. The feelings mutual, Orca. I cant wait to get stronger with you. 22. Bittersweet Memories Many years ago, in downtown Shibuya, an orca ruled the scene. Indeed, this vicious, bloodthirsty, unpredictable creature found its rightful dominion over the prestigious institution of Tsuru University. But it wasnt out of fear or to prey on the weak and vulnerable. Although mighty and formidable, the orca preferred a more gourmet session on the menu. It all began with a decisive right hook in the local mixed martial arts club. The orca threw another punch against a lowly great white in the ring, who thought it was the hottest shit in class. To think such inferior prey believed in these notions solely because the orca was on vacation. It was relentless in its bite in the form of even more punches. One punch, two punch, three punches back; the great white couldnt even tuck its tail from the ring. With a rib-shattering kick to set the score, the other students realized that the once-feared great white, Jiro Yamada, was merely a minnow in an ocean of power. Before long, he staggered like a wasted partygoer before falling face-first into the floorboards. And the winner is Hajime Kato! yelled the referee after the deafening screech of his whistle. An overwhelming number of students erupted in cheer, their faith never wavering for the terrifying yet revered Orca of Tsuru University. The rest of the class, notably of the old-fashioned delinquent uniform type, cried for their beloved Jiro, still in a daze, thinking the fight continued against the senior sensation. But if the 18-year-old Hajime didnt know him better, he begged for another one-sided rematch next week. Jiro groaned from the shooting pain across his body, struggling to get up even a third time. Eventually, a small first aid bag flew in his direction, delivered to him by the one orca who nearly turned his spleen into jelly. What the hell is this? Hajime chuckled above his bloodied head, shining the pearly white grin that everyone had come to see as a sign of either respect or derogation. Patch yourself up, Yamada. You wouldnt be able to cave my skull like you said otherwise. Until then, I want your apology for what you and your buddies did to those two lovebirds. Amidst the ongoing applause, he exited the ring with a new face that told a thousand stories of tranquil fury. They wouldnt have known he had gotten pissed beyond belief if not for his footsteps across the hallway growing heavier and heavier. No one dared approach him that day, especially when the only time he spoke to anyone in class was the school nurse. Then, as though Hajime had a chip in his brain, his demeanor quickly switched into a never-ending cackle as the nurse disclosed what her patients had to say to him. Oh, man. Tokiwa really believed that, didnt she? That it was a decent training to get her shit kicked in? Why would you laugh about that, Mr. Kato? asked the nurse, cleaning her glasses on both lenses. We all know shes too headstrong for anyones good. It pains me that our school president got involved, only for those bastards to beat the life out of him next. Sorry for saying this, but you should never have made them get together. Yeah, but thats exactly why its hilarious. Yall see it as a terrible omen for the future. I, on the other hand, see it as a blessing. How so? Well, I wasnt supposed to reveal this to anyone, but those lovebirds will get hitched soon. Four years from now, to be exact. They even named their kids already! Aint that the cutest? Now, if youll excuse me Hajime couldnt care less how he made the nurse drop her jaw, stiff as a mannequin on her seat. She wouldnt be the last to react this way, given how his two best friends were as different as the earth and stars, and his priority today was to visit them with a gift. He wasnt sure if people still gave patients melon bread baskets, but it was as lovely as the word could ever be. He peeked at the clinics door, the hinges creaking each second, until he discerned them calling out his name, wondering what took him so long to visit. As expected, the school president had mountains of gifts on the corner, but that didnt mean his favorite kendo champion didnt have her fair share of condolences. His gaze even caught a love letter from Jiro, surprisingly enough.Reading on Amazon or a pirate site? This novel is from Royal Road. Support the author by reading it there. I hope you guys enjoy it. Mom still sees both of you as her own, said Hajime, putting his basket between the two piles. Tokiwa gasped at the succulent texture of the melon bread, softer than clouds on a sunny day. Woohoo! I love these! As usual, she wasted no time scarfing one piece at a time. It wouldnt be an exaggeration to say that she was the embodiment of every Shounen hero on television. Thanks, man. It will help me get stronger for our next sparring. You better believe it! Hajime wondered if introducing her to the genre was a bad idea. Her appearance was a spitting image of a rapier-wielding character in a show he didnt like, the one about a solo player trapped in a death game. Their personalities couldnt be any more different, with the only thing setting them apart was her unnatural hair colora vibrant shade of lavender. Now that he mentioned it, his other friend, school president Haruto, still appeared to be the spitting image of the shows protagonist. The memories of calling him the Black Gunman since Haruto had no love for swords came flooding back to him like a comedy trilogy. Perhaps mocking his looks again wouldnt hurt, especially the spiky bangs hanging between his eyes. Alas, Haruto quickly furrowed his brow before declaring, Dont even think about it. If I hear one joke about me starting a harem, Ill frame and report you for things youve never done. All right, all right. Youre the boss, Hajime replied, raising both hands to ease the tension. I aint blind that youre committed to Kendo Girl here in every way, so what say you, Light Novel Boy? Are you willing to accuse a childhood friend of being a devil in disguise? Ill allow that stupid name for now. Urgh! Just as Haruto tried standing from his bed, the swollen bruises on his leg failed him once more. Hajime predicted Tokiwa would fail at her attempt to come for his aid. No human could walk off a shattered rib cage that was like pretzels crushed to oblivion, judging by the x-ray scans. Unable to watch more of their suffering, he carefully laid their backs in more comfortable positions, his stature remaining a towering wonder for them. It almost seemed he was a tall pedestrian helping the little ones by comparison. He gave a lengthy sigh in their presence, his grin slipping away until it became a pitiful grimace. In other words, the orca began swimming in an ocean of remorse, all because the two lovebirds he befriended in the sky had broken their wings. There wasnt anything else to do than the traditional method of apology, kissing the ground as though his life depended on it. Forgive me. Please forgive me. I couldnt be there for you, said Hajime, his lips quivering with the guilt of noticing the mummy-like bandages across their bodies. I know yall might say I dont need to do this, but I aint gonna sleep for months if I dont. The gentle morning breeze made its way through the curtains of the room. He felt a tap on his shoulder, and before he knew it, Tokiwa showed him a face of eternal gratitude, as did Haruto. There were no words, only smiles worthy of their lifelong friendship. Perhaps he also expected this response, but something clicked between them, something more meaningful than an apology. Tokiwa did the honors of breaking the silence, uttering, Thanks again, man. We couldnt have found the strength to fight them off if you didnt give us that push that day. Thats all you need to know. Yeah, and I was the one who doubted you the most, Haruto added. Hajime let out a slight chuckle, rubbing the back of his neck in relief. Well, at least we now know Jiro and his gang are professional misogynists. To think they ganged up on you like that, Tokiwa. Some motherfuckers can never take no for an answer, I suppose. Oh, dont worry about that. My foot prevented several of them from ever having children! The three shared their laughter for hours until twilight ushered in another neon light show around the city. Hajime only returned home when his phone rang, his worried mother rambling about his safety after beating another group of thugs on his way to school, much less his fifteenth skirmish with the local delinquents.
In the present day, in a world that wasnt even his new home, Hajime found comfort in reminiscing about their previous lives. The Brazen Couple surely knew how to work up an appetite upon the revelation that he merely enjoyed their side dish in the living room. According to Haruto, it was the first time he suggested dinner instead of his fiance, who excused herself to work on her swordplay until it was time for the munching. He supposed everyone in Swordland had their hands busy. He insisted on cleaning the empty plate on the table. It was a nice gesture, but he went further by refilling Hajimes bottle of homemade rum. Do you like it? Its aged to perfection under the sea, said Haruto. So, what do you want to eat before we go together tomorrow to meet General Theo? We can make your favorite food if you like. Thank you, but Id rather not, Hajime shrugged, eyes closed with the aura of a laid-back walrus waiting for its meal. I want yall to surprise me. Even if you serve slime fricassee around these parts, all that matters is that it satisfies my stomach. Okay. I was worried because were short on beef this month, but we have loads of mammoth meat in our chests. Hajime lit up his gaze, his body acting on its own as he sprung up from his seat like a classic cartoon character. It had only been a day since he arrived, and he wasnt about to turn down this chance of a lifetime. Did you say mammoth meat? Why, yes. Yes, I did. Its a very rare loot, but we hit the jackpot when we Let me cook. What? Let me cook! 23. The Man Who Can’t Cook Anything Else In a world of magic and leveling, cooking the meat of prehistoric pachyderms enticed Hajime far more than any other thing Swordland had to offer. Had he insisted on the Brazen Couple to use their food storage, theyd probably need to send him to a psych ward. In fact, there was no better reason behind his insistence than it was a fun idea, and the word fun was like a son to him. Hajime was delighted to have Haruto show him the way to their meat cellar below their home, accessible only with another designated [Door Mail]. As foretold, he didnt catch a whiff of anything that smelled like salted pork or beef hanging in hooks. Instead, the scent of live wood permeated the air amidst stacks of chests arranged in four-by-four columns on each wall. Well, this is it, said Haruto, walking past him. It may not seem much, but you can store centuries worth of supplies in these things. Heres where we put our crops. He grabbed an exotic vegetable from one of the chests, which appeared to be a cross between a potato and a carrot. Hajime whistled at their wondrous design of scarlet and silver before turning to his friend. Now, thats a surprise. I didnt know yall found a love for agriculture. Oh, no, we dont farm anything here, at least not traditionally. You see, [Lesser Goblins] tend to spawn where we live and drop veggies and other tasty stuff. In other words, were farming them by exploiting the spots where they pop up. I see he replied, caressing his chin as soon as his mind pondered on the many possibilities of this customary game mechanic. Does that mean yall got mammoths swimming along the coast now and then? Haruto shook his head, eyes closed as he shut the chest gently. We acquired their meat somewhere too far from here, but dont worry. General Theo loves sending us treaders across the land for missions. Think of it as an adventurous exercise. Why else would we have such a title? Oh, Im very familiar with a leader like him. Believe me. Really? I thought you hated authority. Yeah, I still do. But this one dude in my life has given me a bit of interest, if you know what I mean. I never showed it to him, though. Haruto gasped before nodding in realization. Oh, right, I forgot you swing both ways. That aside, let me know if you need help with the spices. We have an open kitchen on the balcony. Happy cooking! The [Door Mail] closed on the other side without vanishing into pixels, a convenient feature if Hajime had more to say in its design. Without any more shenanigans, he rubbed his hands together in preparation for his excitement to serve the juiciest mammoth dinner any human alive could ever taste. Unfortunately, there was a problem, and a very inconvenient one, unlike the door. In all his years in Shibuya, his muscle memory could only master the ingredients for one specific dish: filet mignon. Barring having no access to wagyu beef this time, he instinctively pulled out two barrels of salt and pepper and even otherworldly ingredients by smell alone. No matter what, his soul remained tied to this mouth-watering French delicacy. Hajime stashed the ingredients back where they belonged. But every time he rearranged his thoughts, hoping he wouldnt yank them out again, the inevitable occurred. The fourth attempt didnt help much, either. Grinding his teeth, he gave his head a good repeated smack on a chest with a diamond padlock. Damn it, brain! Why cant you cook anything else!? He continued his sitcom-worthy endeavor until he heard the sound of broken glass between his forehead. Perhaps the skull really was mightier than the diamond, or at least for a man of his strength. He even broke through what was presumably a game feature in the form of the [Eternal Item], the words glitching into nothingness on the floor. Whatever enchantment that padlock had, it sure wasnt eternal now.If you discover this tale on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the violation. No responsible, law-abiding citizen would ever snoop around peoples cherished belongings, but Hajime and his grubby hands acted independently from common sense. Too bad the only thing he could snatch from the unlocked chest were various tax papers and receipts. The most egregious were several transactions from a store that sold handcrafted, phallic art pieces glued to leather belts, all named Husbands Third Lover. Sheesh, Light Novel Boy. Even I aint that crazy with my prostate. He shuffled past many more documents until his eyes caught a parchment envelope with an opened seal at the bottom. It didnt seem to be another [Door Mail], so he carefully peeked at its contents, ushering in more parchment that could be of goblin skin for all he cared. He just needed to know what sacred texts lay within. Disappointingly, he didnt find some ancient spell that could perhaps stop him from thinking about cooking filet mignon. It was a letter in the most mundane nature, written in Hildian, the name of their language he realized just yesterday. It didnt appear to be an old dialect when he took a picture of it with his virtual phone for translation, starting with the following: Dear Abner, Please come to the tree house. I baked a pie for you. Yours truly, F.W. Well, thats a neat reference. Hajime closed the chest and returned to the ingredients section for another try. He hoped that if he couldnt serve them anything besides his favorite food, he could at least try different types of steak.
Once in a blue moon, the Brazen Couple killed time together instead of training their bodies to death. They preferred the usual for tonight, which was a good read of whatever novel they had bought through the years. As luck would have it, Haruto had bargained quite a steal from a fellow reborn hero who owned a copy of Cressida Cowells How To Train Your Dragon. If only the firedrakes in their world were as friendly as the ones in this book. Twenty minutes passed, but suddenly, Hajimes voice beckoned them to the dining table as their exquisite mammoth dinner was finally ready. They raced each other to the second-floor balcony like playful siblings fighting over who could grab a taste of that scrumptious tenderloin first. After Tokiwa relished her victory with no sweat, they immediately began raising an eyebrow at what their chef had served them. Hajime stood behind the table on his back as though he were a show host getting ready to yell the title card. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the greatest meal of your short lives! Mammoth brisket, mammoth T-bone, and the most spectacular, mammoth sirloin! If theres a heaven in this world, this here would be much better! He panted in place, rendered breathless by his literal head-spinning presentation. To the untrained eye, their chef had whipped them up a cornucopia of distinct dishes of the same idea. Sadly, that was far from the case. The garnish of purple leaves resembling parsley was a remarkable touch, and even the potato carrots had a spot for the centerpiece, but alas, they werent different dishes. The Brazen Couple had merely witnessed seven instances of his ever-so-familiar filet mignon. Yet, despite what would be a grave embarrassment for anyone with two brain cells, they laughed. They laughed in the joy of missing their old friend after what seemed like ten thousand years of searching and waiting. Tokiwa, in particular, would love to thank every existing pantheon that their precious Hajime hadnt changed even an inch in his character. Tokiwa gently laid her hand on Hajimes shoulder, smiling more than ever. Well take it from here a new dinner, if you will. My Haruto knew this would happen from the start. What? Oh, hell, nah! Hajime objected. Dont act like I dont remember yall having the worst cooking in class. Three orphanages nearly died because of your Udon Charity, and dont get me started with what happened to the principals wife. Then, why else would the snacks we gave you taste delicious otherwise, hmm? said Tokiwa, arms crossed with a face of never-ending condescension. I dunno. Maybe I developed a resistance to your cooking. At that point, its better to eat the same meal than something that could kill a thousand mammoths, not counting your loot. Tokiwa sighed, not in defeat but because he was keen on making her recall every detail of their past mishaps. She moved to the balconys kitchen, complete with a skillet as long as a ping pong table. Look, I know you wont believe us, but you dont have to, she said, donning an apron showing a cartoon clock and a toque that sagged to the left. You dont even need to watch us. All we need is your trust, and well start fast. Surprisingly, Hajime sighed in defeat instead, unable to protest the confidence beaming from the finesse of wearing their uniforms alone. All right, Ill bite literally. 24. Cooking & Romance The Brazen Couple began their most cherished routine every day off, a routine that nearly killed one of General Theos supreme chefs from the sweet, heavenly aroma of their kitchen alone. But tonight was different. With only the two of them together, their actions ushered in the more intimate side of teamwork. Even as Haruto reached for an adequate knife to slice the potato carrots, his cheeks bloomed in a rose tint once Tokiwas fingers connected with his. Haruto knew what face Tokiwa had shown him in more ways than one. It was the same mischievous look he saw at a party, revealing that she had already foreseen his next move. He wasnt sure if it made things slightly more adorable between them, but given the versatility of her [Essence of Time], perhaps she had her sights set on doing another accident at the right moment. It didnt stop there with the potato carrots. Just as Haruto tried reaching for a box of white, leafy vegetables resembling celery, his hand grabbed a heaping load of nothing instead. Meanwhile, his fiance had already minced three to four of them like a roadrunner on speed, glancing at him with the same face. Yet, no sliver of annoyance crept through his thoughts. If anything, he returned her joy with a quick snatch of a single potato carrot. It was a hard-won battle, to be sure. Haruto twirled the tuberous crop not too dissimilar with his pistols. I dont mind if I only handle the meat again if thats what youre getting at, he said before tossing it back to her hand in perfect accuracy. Oh, no, honey. That wasnt my intention, giggled Tokiwa. I just missed the old days, thats all. When I didnt train my guts out for the next championship, Id be at home nuzzling at your back as you whisked your worries away by cooking dinner for me. Then, you showed me how fun it was to do it together. Well, why didnt you say so? All we need now is more green onions, and Ill be your precious pookie bear whipping you up a damn good meal after a hard days work. really? Yup. It makes my heart bounce anyway. To some, love was confusing; to others, it made sense. And sometimes, you needed a degree in rocket science to figure out the secret dynamic between a proud marksman and a headstrong swordswoman. All the tabloids in Coelestis would never believe it for a second, and Haruto preferred that. It was a million times better than how their old friend perceived their relationship, always at the expense of a tired joke. And so, they began to search for the best recipes for mammoth meat through a series of cookbooks, which didnt so much as collect dust from the rims compared to even the novel section in their library. With Tokiwa choosing a hefty serving of mammoth casserole that could feed a city, they washed any leafy greens the recipe had called for within seconds, including the white celery. Their sink always proved big enough for four hands at a time. Then, they moved on with the sauce at a similar pace. For once, Haruto found a use for their tub of [Bicorn] milk that didnt involve Tokiwas second job, with their combined strength pouring half of it in a bowl on the count of three. He gladly allowed her to taste the rich, ivory mixture of salt, pepper, and many otherworldly spices at their disposal. Amidst the choreographed symphony of their teamwork, his screen began setting the mood even further:
Soul Melody Activated
NOW PLAYING
Lucky - Jason Mraz feat. Colbie Caillat
It wouldnt be dinner at the HaruToki Residence if they didnt add many more dishes. Luckily, it was time for their skillet to shine, with Haruto flipping bite-sized cubes of the softest parts of the meat, sizzling in a rhythm that only his nose could hear. On the other hand, Tokiwa began to engage the one thing promised to hera faint, delicate, heart-thumping nuzzle behind his back. Rest assured, he prepared for the hickeys. Out of the many things to know about cooking mammoth was that other parts could take a century to be palatable. As such, Tokiwa snapped her fingers at the rest of the meat lying on the chopping boards, ushering in a marshmallow softness in their texture with the slightest touch. The nuzzling had yet to stop, and it hopefully wouldnt be their last. You know I can feel you sneaking a nibble in my neck, right? said Haruto, preparing the final dish: mammoth stew. Tokiwa opened her eyes, gripping more firmly with a smile. Yeah what about it? No matter where you go, you smell like roses and lilacs. She took another whiff of his scent, her breath reeling into a realm of ecstasy and excitement. Oh, babe, marry me!A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation. Well, we are getting married. I wouldnt trade this life for all the gold in this world or the one we left. Or, if you want me to be more blunt and risque, I wouldnt trade it for your hair and thighs. Ahem! Id worship the hell out of them, too, if I cloned myself. Now that you mention it, I wouldnt trade this life for all the gems in this world or the one we left. Or, if you want me to cut to the chase, I wouldnt trade it for your cute little butt. You better work it real hard next time. Okay. I havent found the right shorts yet, but Ill make you happy, somehow. Im sure you will. Tokiwa opened her eyes again, spotting what her grandmother would consider a fatal flaw in making a stew. Honey, you forgot the wine! It looks pale and awful. Oh, shit. I knew this would happen. Hold on a sec Beyond any form of bewilderment, Haruto couldnt find even a trace of the bottle of pinot noir he had placed on the table behind them. Searching around the balcony didnt help much to the point that they might need to go full-on Sherlock Holmes with every nook and cranny. It didnt take long for Tokiwa to have a better solution. Dont worry. I got this, she said with unbridled confidence. She raised her hands, and several ghostly apparitions appeared in the kitchen, but there was no need for alarm. Nearly all of Swordland had witnessed at least one instance of her [Essence of Time] creating playable memories, not unlike a tape recording. She even patented the word herself for better clarity. Finally, after discerning only a few minutes into the past, the Brazen Couple caught a glimpse of the culprit. It was no stealthy burglar, however. In a millionth of a billionth of a second, the playable memory showed a hand shrouded in electricity swiping the bottle, which proved more difficult for her concentration to capture. Either way, they couldnt mistake the telltale signs of scarring around the knuckles or the amount of veins pulsating from the muscular grip. Just as they planned to investigate their old friend, who seemed to have enjoyed himself downstairs, the [Soul Melody] of their love had ceased. What came in its place was an energetic pop song that sold like hotcakes in their home country.
Soul Melody Activated
NOW PLAYING
Hai Yorokonde - Kocchi no Kento
Indeed, Hajime would be the first to admit he enjoyed being the life of the party, even in his alone time. If only there were a party to speak of instead of stomping on the floorboards with the same finesse as a 1970s disco animal. All those years of ridicule for his two left feet had paid off. His fingers went up, his fingers went down, and his feet were a machine of pure funk. The groovy antics escalated as the chorus played louder than the rest of the music. Get it, get it down! Get it, get it down! Odore! Hajime continued his servitude to the beat, caring less that his two best friends stood before him in sheer confusion. He didnt know what to explain besides that his body was also confused at his newfound ability to perform an actual dance where he didnt fall face-first once. He just did. Haruto raised a finger, cautiously advancing closer. Um, Hajime can you umm The melody was relentless, drowning any other attempt to catch his attention, but as a wise man once said, all good things must end. That notion couldnt be far more literal as the last chorus played, leaving him panting like a lost traveler in the Mojave Desert. Sorry, Light Novel Boy. I didnt mean to shake up the neighbors. We dont have neighbors, Haruto revealed. Im talking about the fish folk beneath the waves if you have any. Hajime gave him a hearty laugh, walking toward the nearest sofa for his couch potato phase. Anyway, is dinner ready? Mammoths dont seem chewy to eat, so take your time. Actually, were almost done. We only need more of the wine youre drinking right now back at the cellar. No problemo, Jos. I can do that for you lickety-split. Watch. His mind decided that playing genie wouldnt hurt for tonight, with a fresh new bottle materializing out of his hand. The most remarkable reaction Hajime got was a Tokiwa with eyes lit up in extreme delight, rambling about how blessed he was to have multiple [Essences]. It was a neat name for the unique abilities of every treader in Swordland, but that only meant her patience in fighting him to get stronger had lessened. He couldnt blame her since the word fun never understood patience either. Surprisingly, Tokiwa was willing to wait a month until he was ready for a challenge of the ages, following her fiance back to the kitchen. Now that his alone time had returned, he couldnt say he had the heart to reveal to them his true ambitions in a world where he didnt belong. No one could. Their friendship might have been thicker than water, but it was all for the sake of the mission, and he had two more friends to worry about. Summoning his virtual phone, he waited for the other line to pick up a familiar voice. The ringing ceased quicker than expected, and he sighed with every sense of relief in his heart. Farkas, is that you? Yeah, dude, whats up? Oh, nothing. Im still in Swordland. So far, nobody has noticed where I come from. I wish yall were here, honestly. I got to meet my school buddies again before I died. Wow, thats great! What are they like? Its pretty hard to explain, Hajime continued in a tone close to a whisper. Lets just say theyre shorter than Paulie, shorter than you, and shorter than me kneeling for a prayer. Farkas howled in amusement, carried by the semi-grainy reception. Okay, whatever you say, dude. By the way, Paulie and I are back here in Agrima. I gotta admit, Our Majesty didnt want us to stay any longer from where we ended up. Why? I dont know. Harald never told us. It was a very barren land, as far as I knew. But if you wanna know more about the horde, Ive got an excellent story to tell just between you and me. Hajime chuckled, shining another pearly white grin in a world where he still didnt belong, now itching for a tale close to home. Lay it on me, man. Tell me how excellent it truly is. 25. The Sins of the Forefathers Under the blue moonlight, the sky islands of Agrima transformed into a cascade of neon colors across the nation. The vines and other vegetation in the buildings never seemed to hamper its glimmering beauty. If anything, Farkas had witnessed what it was like for a country mouse to set foot in a literal urban jungle. It was gorgeous, all possible to see through his ride in the high-speed cable system that operated above any skyscraper. Farkas admitted to himself that the H.S.C had improved since his time. Taking one of the cable trains that could fit three ballrooms worth of passengers, they zipped through between holographic billboards selling them the new clothing trend and other products too many to countall local and homegrown in a world always reaching closer to Heaven. What made it more worthwhile was the conductors immaculate taste in music.
NOW PLAYING
All The Stars - Kendrick Lamar feat. SZA
Farkas, being hard-pressed not to lean on the window, continued to tap his finger through the beat. Perhaps home sweet home was enough to satisfy his past excitement for going on a reality trip with Hajime. He wanted to save this occasion once they returned, but Paulie insisted on celebrating their relief of living another day in a restaurant revered like no other: the Hungry Salmon. He could already glimpse their desired location, built within a larger-than-life rock formation that served as the mountains teeming with palm trees leading to the establishment. He never thought a fish-themed restaurant would appear so enticing on the horizon, with its animatronic entrance shaped like a salmons mouth that opened and closed for every guest arriving. His taste buds already tingled for their famed sashimi rolls. Farkas yawned with a lengthy stretch on his seat and checked each of his retractable, five-inch claws for the slightest dirt. Life is good, aint it, Paulie? he said, cleaning his teeth with the natural toothpicks. I wish our dude was here. I only hope the mission will go smoothly. I wouldnt worry about that, Paulie replied, forced to sit on the floor lest the cable train tilted to an unimaginable disaster. Mr. Hajime is the first student I had who leaned into the madness of [Way of the Thunder] since Well, you know who Im talking about. All the others failed, thinking they were invincible, but not these two. They learned how to be truly insane. Oh, yeah, youre right. I never met Maria, but its quite a coincidence that both love discussing fun in almost any situation. Maybe thats why Clovis hates his guts. Or maybe he now sees something in Mr. Hajime that weve yet to realize. Like, he shouldve broken out of his cell days ago. Farkas scratched the back of his neck, recalling when a Singing Flutes member caught wind of their friends whereabouts. He never knew how they couldve known about the mission. All he cared about now was removing a stubborn black spot under his pinky fingernail. Well, whatever the case, we better look presentable in the place were going, he continued. You better despawn your ax, too. I know its your pride and joy, but we gotta Before Farkas could finish his concerns about dress codes in fine dining, the cable train screeched to a complete stop. His mouth wouldve tasted something else on the floor without his seatbelt. On the other hand, he witnessed Paulie remaining unmovable like the towering behemoth he was. It mustve been neat. Amidst a cacophony of protests and anger from the passengers, he noticed several billboards emerging around the cable train, shining red like the blood coursing through his Lupinian veins. In fact, his instincts brought upon a sense of familiarity as soon as he witnessed the yellow symbol on the billboards. Without a doubt, it was a cats paw or that of a mighty tiger, depending on the person. It didnt take long for Farkas and the others on the train to meet with a very ominous message through the billboards, almost as though it threatened their lives if they didnt comply. Even the initial paragraph of demands had a fiery tone in the name of justice: Dear Lupinian settlers and their protectors, The Hungry Salmon is now rightfully and legally the property of our elders for the rest of your days. If you wish to engage with our culture and other landmarks of Felidine history, you must pay double the invitation. It is to help keep our so-called ghettos afloat that your state has abandoned long ago in favor of our oppressors. As for any Lupinian settler naive enough to forget the past, we advise them to leave the premises at once before the situation escalates with our people. Any retaliation against our right to a space of our own shall incur the wrath of our tired voices and aching fists. We will forever keep our word until actual reparations and formal apologies finally come to the table.If you spot this tale on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation. Glory to Felidane, Death to Lupis Farkas bit his lip the more thoroughly he read the message. It forced his mind to play a memory he had buried since his teenage years, wrought with the sounds of gunfire and napalm from his nations state-of-the-art technology, whose name he refused to remember for the sake of his sanity. He preferred another Lantek Supreme from Dougland Bites than confront the new owners of this restaurant. Paulie walked past him, smiling like a daunting warrior facing a wondrous challenge. Say, do you wanna enter this joint the fun way like Mr. Hajime? Ill order a Shop Copter for some cat ears and a tail if you want. All it takes is one button from our phones, and were good to go. No, dont! pleaded Farkas, grabbing his shoulder tightly from behind. Why not? Its just a bunch of Felidines acting out again. Yes, and thats exactly why you shouldnt say such things! He sighed, calming his nerves while adjusting the wolf-themed headgear that defined his lineage since he learned to walk. Im telling you this not just because their senses are too keen for cheap costumes, but I suppose even a toddler could see through that. Whatever the case, I dont want anything to do with them. Paulie lowered his smile slightly until it became a face that told a thousand stories of friendship and understanding. Look, if its up to you, Im with you either way, he said on his knees. I dont agree with this, but my father used to say these Felidines are just exploiting the system to reap social benefits. Thats not true! How is any of that true!? Hey, calm down. I didnt say that. I know youre the enemy in their eyes, but why are you so worked up about this? They have a home to come back to, unlike you. No, they dont because because Farkas continued fumbling his words, with many more horrific noises whirling in his thoughts. Luckily, he spilled the beans in this third attempt, uttering, Their home is gone, gone without a trace. He froze in place, as did his friend. In truth, he refused to explain in a place full of enraged citizens starving for expensive seafood, especially when he noticed several of them calling Felidines welfare leeches and even violent criminals. Meanwhile, the worst he could get from his Lupinian self were kids wanting to see how sharp his claws were. It was too much. Coming to an understanding, they pulled out their [Insta-Warp] cards to arrive at the most familiar yet most dangerous place for a player.
Even at night, the grass field where the horde waited for their flesh remained lush with morning dew. Farkas suggested they do a bit of stargazing before visiting another restaurant filled with the customs of Trom, Paulies small yet bright green planet just above their heads, billions of lightyears away. He appreciated him pointing where it was in an ocean of constellations, making him seem like a gnat in a jar. Perhaps his home was out there, too. Unfortunately, he couldnt be more depressed at the idea, finally deciding to reveal more of what haunted his entire existence. War is war, as they say, but what happened between my people and theirs was anything but. It was a slaughter, raining down on them like the last fireflies theyll ever see. And for what? Because they nibbled back at us with whatever petty resources they had? Disgusting. Oh, come on. Dont be too hard on yourself, said Paulie, turning to him with another smile. Im a Tromian, you know? We fought so many countries even before my great, great-grandfather was born. But I learned to apologize when I could, and eventually, we all learned to forgive. Well, thats easy to say when your enemies still exist. Throughout my youth, everyone taught me that Felidane was a myth, that their people never existed outside of folktales about a primitive society who climbed trees all day. And as you know, its not like Im welcome in my own home anymore. Yeah, but the past must move on. I wasnt there to make friends in your world. I only wanted to know if you were safe. Dude, they chucked rocks at you and your students and even threatened to cut your legs off to an average height, Farkas added. And yet, were supposed to be the civilized ones. I hate it so much, but I cant make amends with something beyond my control. Its better to recognize the atrocities and keep them to myself. He gazed at the stars again, his soul entering a land of regrets out of the blood that might as well be in his hands. That was the life he chose, unloved and unwanted by all. But even through his regrets, it still wouldnt compare to a Felidine hiding in the shadows of a foreign country that merely tolerated them. Paulie stopped his share of the moment and hopped out of the boulder with his ax appearing in a cloud of pixie dust. The act triggered the one screen that kept the average player alert for weeks.
{Welcome to Beware the Horde}
WARNING
Slime Wave Incoming
Dont mind me. Just killing some time, said Paulie, twirling his ax with the same ease as a hollow cane. We dont have to fight together. You can watch me mow them down in seconds alongside the goblins. Look. No matter what, Farkas observed in pure amazement how someone five times his size could be so nimble in battle. After the slime massacre within thirty seconds and the goblin execution within a minute, his soul exited the land of regrets and into a new realm that his best friend Hajime loved with every bone in his bodythe land of fun.
WARNING
Orc Wave Incoming
Continue?
YES NO
26. A Wolf’s Fangs Never Dull Orcs, a name derived from the Italian word orco, meaning foul demon or beast. The game excelled at making them appear this way at first glance, especially their gray skin and balding heads as though they had rotten from the inside out. But what had thrust upon Farkas and Paulie were anything but the actions of a mindless army. It wasnt their first encounter, but with the noise of bugles in the distance, it might as well be. The orcs didnt charge at them head-on like the slimes or goblins, preferring a more efficient strategy eerily similar to traditional human warfare. On one side, Farkas steeled himself against a legion of spears in a tight row, ready to barbecue his guts out, while the rest had forced Paulie to split from their ground. With their shockingly nimble stride, they lunged at him at speeds no different from a sports car. Now, if the game blessed you with average player physiology, like running across the field faster than sound, a dozen orcs coming your way didnt seem that bad. Alas, the horde would never be so kind as to give them an even chance. No matter what horizon his Lupinian eyes observed, the army roared at the billions and maybe even trillions. Hed rather not know the whole estimate, but it was loud and angry. Damn it, I hate using these again. It hurts like shit. Farkas raised his hands, bearing claws that began shining a coat of silver under the moonlight. Eventually, his teeth made way for a pair of fangs, ripping through his gums in a bloody affair on both ends. Surprisingly, the orcs halted their assault like they had realized the imminent danger of his feral aura. The only thing left to do to complete the light transformation of his lineage was to keep in touch with his player instincts. His screen was more than ready to give him just enough strength to slaughter them in droves:
Choose an Upgrade
Way of the Pistol The deadly accuracy of ancient marksmanship. +40 ATK, -30 DEF, +40 SPD Gain super skill [Guns Akimbo]. 6-second cooldown
Way of the Spell The mystical science of ancient sorcery. +70 ATK, -50 DEF, +15 SPD Gain super skill [Hex Mirror]. 4-second cooldown
Way of the Wind The sweeping destruction of ancient weather. +80 ATK, -70 DEF, +30 SPD Gain super skill [Hurricane Sickle]. 7-second cooldown
Many months ago, Farkas wouldnt use his innate skill when beginning a fight. The power it gave him paled to his best friends, made worse by its massive effect on defense in favor of a decent increase in attack. On the other hand, the speed boost wouldnt make much of a difference in the long run, especially with these enemies. But if he learned anything over the past few days, it was to loosen his shoulders and put all his faith in the word fun. Wolfsjagd! he declared, summoning a slashing tornado around his claws in a jaw-like fashion. Against the first row, the initial gust turned all their spears into extra-thin metal and wood, with tens of thousands of orc heads littering the field. Others had worse luck by getting reduced to ribbons. The next row doubled in size, flanking Farkas into a boulder. Fortunately, the [Way of the Wind] did more than merely complement his razor-sharp combat, even if his next move was unimaginative. With the yell of a new attack named Wolfsbane, the enemy flew onto the heavens at every angle, uprooting even the grass beneath his feet. Sprinting to another spot with a heavy breath, he reunited with Paulie, whose face showed the same madness of pure fun. Very tough challenge, amirite, dude? Oh, you bet! Paulie agreed, spinning his ax with casual finesse against any orc dumb enough to get close. I read about the lore section of these guys the other day. It turns out they have a taste for vegetable soup when were not on the menu. Farkas laughed at the idea that orcs enjoyed something not even his Lupinian stomach could tolerate. If only he could actually witness the little things in this game instead of more flavor text, as Hajime would say. He could already picture his pearly white grin across the cosmos, lucky enough to fight otherworldly NPCs that wouldnt just disappear after the fun was over. It was sad but very much expected for the horde.Support the creativity of authors by visiting the original site for this novel and more. Coincidentally, they gained roughly the same kills, with Farkas only being one orc shy away from reaching level 50. It didnt really matter since it was time for his secondary skill to gain more raw damage.
Choose an Upgrade
Smart Rounds Bullets have a chance to home at multiple targets with additional piercing damage
Forbidden Arts On hit, spell attacks will lower the defense and speed of enemies in a short radius. No effect with other skills
Boreas Punishment Enemies that get too close will be subject to a forced levitation effect. Can affect other players if seen as such
In truth, it was a no-brainer to choose the third option, even if Farkas loved the first one. Perhaps one day, he could make live ammunition out of his claws. It was probably best to keep that dream hidden in his thoughts since Paulie smirked at his face like an older brother who knew how utterly stupid it was to believe such things. Nevertheless, he jumped into the fray at the next orc wave, which now quadrupled in numbers. It was one of the games more annoying mechanics, begrudgingly enough. Each wave followed a formula similar to two apples becoming eight instead of four. Eventually, those apples would become thirty-two, and thirty-two would become one hundred and twenty-eight. There was no amount of rinsing and repeating the player routine to stop any slime, goblin, or orc from multiplying into literal oceans of mass brutality. They just needed to fight harder. That wasnt to say players didnt have their own brand of luck against the horde, as Farkas had delightedly shown with more fun in his soul. He was confident that a mere swipe of his claws could turn entire cities into ghost towns, something he never wouldve imagined without being its first witness. Every tsunami of orcs trying to end his life became little more than droplets on a leaf once he decided to use two hands. After another howling Wolfsbane to conclude his second dose of fun, the entire field fell silent like a church on Wednesday. His heart came close to pounding out of his ribs in anticipation of the final wave, perhaps not even in a comedic manner. The screen flashing before the two players had no hilarity to give.
Boss Battle
Purandar the Terrible
HP 200,000,000
ATK 50,000
DEF 60,000
SPD 20,000
Farkas knew this wasnt their first encounter with the orcs, but he forgot to mention to Paulie that they had yet to get past the orc kings initial assault. It was a technique not so different from his slashing gales, only somehow worse than even the depths of hell itself, so much so that his mind wouldnt wish to remember its name. Perhaps there was no need since Purandar began to lift his sword high in the air without as much as a sound, unlike his minions. Paulie prevented him from coming any closer, resting his ax on his shoulder. Dont worry. I got this. What? How? said Farkas with a raised eyebrow. Weve never gone this far without that guy killing us in a millisecond. I dont think even Hajime or Clovis will have an easy stroll with him. Oh, they will. Ive seen the latter run circles around this boss. Paulie gave his ax another twirl, and what appeared to be a miracle in the eyes of a Lupinian, his arm grew a subtle bulk. Remember when people always say Im a different breed? Well, I finally found out what made me special. You see, there was once a game in Trom that Heartbreaking. Before Paulie could present his resolve in possibly the most legendary reveal Farkas wouldve witnessed all day, Purandar made a crimson stain out of him on the grass with his infamous [Dead Moon Swing]. If his claws could turn cities into ghost towns, the orc kings blade could turn mountains into dust. Paulie! He didnt want to yell his name like a lost child in a forest. His friend had eight more lives to spare before the inevitable game over, but that only meant his Lupinian self had more than enough humanity, so to his detriment, another crescent slash of green energy befell his glance as he turned back. Paulie He crawled on his elbows, leaving his other half behind. How inconvenient it mustve been not to unlock the extra lives [Blessing]. Just before lights out, he noticed the orc king switching his attention to a more menacing threat, whatever it was. All he knew was that two distinct roars bombarded his senses that night, with only one of them being familiar.
Several watchful gazes continued their favorite pastime of observing whatever player was on the field. Some gave up to do better things, disappointed that the new hero wasnt there to entertain their boring lives, while others remained seated in sheer amazement. Holy moly, Ive never seen this side of Paulie before, said a young teenage boy, his frilly afro shaking from his excitement. He can crush You-Know-What if he wanted to! An older man next to him cleaned his aviator shades for a moment until they regained their luster. Umm, I dont think thats possible, meu cara. Can you imagine even that bastardo Clovis scratching that thing? He thinks he can, but we know better. Yeah, youre probably right, but maybe once I get a hold of its true power, we can finally free our reality from its grasp! Its stupid, but a man can dream. Well, why not let me fly you to its domain right now? Were the Seven Miracles, no? Youll become number one instead of him. Meh, its an interesting title, but were not invincible. It feels pretty comfy being at number three. Agreed. The real question here is, when is the other bastardo going to realize he already has a spot at number two? I dont know. Maybe when the missions over.