ã€ŠRaising a Mutant: A Young Superman (and friends) Hurt/Comfort Adoption Ficã€‹


 Chapter 1: Rescue

    Jonathan recognized the look Martha wore on her face as she entered the house. It was the look that meant she''d made up her mind about something, and he wasn''t going to like it.

    In the chaos of Clark''s last few weeks of kindergarten¡ªthere always seemed to be so much more to do than they had time for, with the little guy running around¡ªthey''d let the registration tags on the truck expire. Martha had gotten a fix-it ticket for the tags, and she''d gone down to the police station to clear it up. Jonathan hadn''t expected to see her return with that face.

    "What''s on your mind, sweetie?" he asked.

    Martha stared at him intently. "There was a boy at the station whose father had just been arrested. His mother passed away, and he doesn''t have any other family. They''re looking for foster parents. Probably adoptive parents, depending on the outcome of the trial."

    "You''re thinking of taking him in."

    "Well, we''ve been waiting for a placement. His social worker offered it to us."

    "That''s great news!" Jonathan smiled. She didn''t smile back, and Jonathan realized there must be a catch. "What''s wrong?"

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    "He''s been abused. I saw the bruises. He also has hallucinations about his baby brother who passed away."

    "Okay." Jonathan didn''t expect a child whose father had been arrested to come without issues.

    "He has an . . . unusual appearance."

    Jonathan shook his head. "When have I ever cared about that?"

    Martha nodded. "He''s also thirteen."

    Jonathan shrugged. "Older might be better. He needs to be mature enough to handle Clark''s secret."

    "Okay." Martha smiled. "I''ll call the social worker and say we''re accepting the placement."

    Something about the way Martha said it made Jonathan wonder if she was holding something back. "Martha. What''s wrong with him, really?"

    She winced. "You . . . might not like his name."

    Jonathan let out a short laugh. "His name? Honey, you have to know me better than that."

    "Great!" Martha kissed him on the cheek. "I''ll make the call."

    She reached for the phone, and Jonathan frowned. "Um, what is his name?"

    "Alexander Luthor." Martha put the phone to her ear. "Hello? This is Martha Kent. Yes, we''ll take him."

    Luthor.

    Lionel''s son.

    Jonathan knew why Martha had felt the need to dance around the Luthor name¡ªhe hadn''t exactly kept his disdain for Lionel quiet¡ªbut if Lionel''s son was thirteen, he wouldn''t have yet had the opportunity to develop into the spitting image of his father yet. The boy might need quite a lot of love and discipline to rise above his genes, but Jonathan was happy to provide in a way Lionel hadn''t.

    And if the boy had been mistreated by Lionel . . . well, that was something Jonathan could sympathize with.

 Chapter 2: First Day

    Martha knew she''d played a bit of a dirty trick on Jonathan to get him to agree to take in Alexander. She couldn''t quite feel guilty about it, though. Back at the police station, it had only taken one look at those bright blue-green eyes, the split lip, the bruising around his left cheekbone, and the scrapes covering the right side of his head, and her heart was a puddle.

    Alexander''s social worker arranged to bring him to the house around dinnertime the next day. Martha and Jonathan made sure to have Clark ready in the living room for when they arrived. Martha had talked to Clark a little about how they were going to have another boy living in the house, but she wasn''t sure how he would react when they met¡ªhe didn''t meet many new people outside of his school, and she wasn''t sure if he''d ever met a bald person before.

    Alexander held his shoulders stiff as he walked into the living room. A dark blue baseball cap covered most of the scrapes she''d seen the day before.

    "Hats off in the house, Alexander," Jonathan said.

    Alexander''s face turned bright pink, and he took the hat off, lowering his eyes to the floor. He was clearly mortified about his baldness. Martha could have throttled her husband.

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    Clark took a step toward Alexander. "You look way better without it."

    Martha breathed in to say something, anything, but she had no idea how to make the situation less awkward. She took Clark''s little hand, and knelt down beside him. "Clark, this is Alexander."

    "Uh, just Lex," the teen said.

    "Oh! Okay." Martha nodded and stood. "Lex, this is Clark."

    "Hi, Clark," Lex said.

    Clark''s eyebrows raised. "Are you my new big brother?"

    "Uh, no. Just staying here for a little while until my dad gets out of . . ." Lex swallowed.

    "Out of what?" Clark scratched at his arm.

    Martha cleared her throat. "Clark, why don''t you help Daddy set the table?"

    Clark''s eyes shifted up to the bandages on Lex''s head. "Did you get hurt? What happened?"

    "Go." She gave Clark a firm pat on the back, and Jonathan a quick nod, before turning to Lex. "Let''s get your bandages changed, and then I''ll get dinner out of the oven."

    "Thanks, Mrs. Kent."

    "Of course. But, um, you might be here awhile. Why don''t you call me Martha?"

    "I''m not gonna be here very long."

    Martha didn''t know where to go from there, so she left it alone for the time being. "I''m sorry about Clark. He''s six, he doesn''t have much of a filter. I can talk to him if you want me to."

    "No, he''s okay." Lex''s eyes wandered toward the kitchen. And for the first time Martha had seen, he smiled.

 Chapter 3: Nightmare

    Clark was almost asleep when a sound from next door woke him up. It sounded like crying. He wasn''t supposed to get out of bed after Dad turned out the lights, but if Lex was crying, Clark had to help him. He climbed out of bed and tiptoed across the cold floor into Lex''s room.

    Lex shot up in bed and flicked on the lamp. His eyes were swollen. "Clark?"

    "Are you okay?"

    "I''m fine, just . . . nightmare."

    "Oh!" Clark knew what to do about that. "Mo-om!" he yelled.

    Panic filled Lex''s eyes. "Sh, sh! What are you doing?"

    "You had a nightmeer. You need Mom." Lex was supposed to know that. He was thirteen!

    Clark heard the door to his own bedroom open¡ªMom must have thought he was calling from there¡ªthen the door to Lex''s room opened. Mom was in her pajamas, and she looked worried. "Clark, what are you doing in here?"

    Lex scooted back against his headboard. "I''m so sorry, Mrs. Kent, I tried to¡ª"

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    "He had a nightmeer," Clark said. She had to help him make the bad thoughts go away.

    Mom nodded. "Are you okay, Lex?"

    "I''m fine, you can go back to bed."

    "No!" Clark said. "You have to tell her what the dream was about!" Lex at least needed a snuggle.

    Mom frowned. "Clark, Lex is a big kid. He''ll call me for help if he needs it."

    "But¡ªbut I heard him crying."

    "I wasn''t crying!" Lex''s voice crackled.

    "Was so!"

    Mom took a deep breath, then went over to sit on the edge of Lex''s bed. "Is there anything you want to talk about?" she said softly.

    "I''m fine. I just . . . I miss my dad."

    Mom nodded slowly, though she looked kind of upset. "Of course." She gently rubbed Lex''s back. Clark didn''t think that was as good as a snuggle, but it was better than nothing, and Lex seemed to relax a little.

    "Sorry, Mrs. Kent."

    "You have nothing to be sorry for."

    Lex laid down, and Mom tucked the covers around him, then she turned off the lamp. She reached down and picked up Clark, carrying him into his own bedroom and placing him on his bed.

    "Where''s his dad?" Clark crawled under the covers.

    "He''s in jail." Mom tucked him in.

    "Jail?"

    "Yes. But don''t talk to Lex about it unless he brings it up."

    "Why not?"

    "Because you''ll be in big trouble if you do."

    Clark pouted.

    "I mean it, Clark Jerome Kent."

    "Fine." Clark knew Mom only used all three names when it was important. "Is Lex gonna be okay?"

    "I think so. If you want to, you can say a little prayer for him before you go to sleep." Mom kissed him on the forehead.

    "Okay, Mom." Clark nodded and closed his eyes.

 Chapter 4: Anxiety

    The next morning, Mr. Kent took Lex out and showed him how to muck out the stables. Lex didn''t mind¡ªit was one of the chores they''d done out at the ranch in Montana. He lingered by the horse stalls, laughing as one picked up an apple from the flat of his hand.

    Mr. Kent looked surprised when Lex already knew how to do the work. "Gotta say, Lex," he said, "I thought it would take you a couple months to get the hang of all this."

    Lex''s mouth went dry.

    A couple months.

    "My father''s not staying in prison."

    Mr. Kent''s face reddened, then he said, softly, "Lex . . . he beat you."

    "He''s never beaten me." Well, once, when he''d really deserved it, but Lex didn''t want to tell Mr. Kent about Julian.

    "Then . . ." Mr. Kent''s eyes wandered to the scrapes on Lex''s head.

    "It wasn''t like that." His father had shaken him, and pushed him. It wasn''t his fault that Lex had tripped into a display case. "It was an accident."

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    "The courts might not see it that way."

    "But¡ªbut he can''t stay in prison." Lex blinked back tears. "What about LuthorCorp?"

    A split-second flash in Mr. Kent''s eyes told Lex all he needed to know.

    Mr. Kent was one of them. The people who hated his father.

    Rage blurred the corners of his vision. "You want him to stay in prison!"

    Mr. Kent''s voice caught. "Lex¡ª"

    "No!" Lex stormed away and went over to sit on a hay bale, pulling his knees into his chest.

    A few seconds later, the other side of the bale dipped slightly.

    Lex buried his face in his knees. "Go away."

    "I''ve met your father, Lex."

    Lex pulled his legs in tighter. "You don''t know anything."

    Mr. Kent let out a long, slow breath. "I know that not all pain is physical. I know your father isn''t the type of man who would have to beat you in order to hurt you."

    Lex didn''t say anything. Some little part of him wondered if he was more scared to lose his father, or to have to return home. Lex was in for the worst punishment of his life when his father got out of prison, for screaming and alerting the neighbors when he fell. Maybe Lex could get out of being punished if his father really did stay in prison . . .

    Lex winced. He couldn''t think like that. His father was the only family he had left.

    "Hey." Mr. Kent put a warm hand on his back. "You''re gonna get to make a testimony. Just tell them the truth. Okay?"

    "Okay." Lex slowly released his knees. Mr. Kent''s hand moved to gently rub between his shoulder blades, the way Mrs. Kent had done the night before. The way his mother used to comfort him. Lex let his eyes fall closed.

 Chapter 5: Comfort

    Martha was delighted to see that Jonathan came into the house after the morning chores with a demeanor lighter than he''d carried in awhile. When Lex went upstairs to shower, Jonathan stated simply, "Kid works hard. Loves the horses." Martha grinned¡ªshe knew exactly how much that meant coming from her husband.

    Meanwhile, Martha had to remind Clark over and over again that he wasn''t allowed to use his powers to speed through his chores. They were going to tell Lex about Clark''s abilities soon, but they wanted to give Lex a little bit of time to settle in first. Unfortunately, Clark was so excited to play with his new "big brother" that it was all they could do to keep him from zooming all around the farm.

    Martha wasn''t sure if the teen would indulge their six-year-old, but Lex happily sat down to play a board game with Clark after lunch, and even seemed to be letting him win. After a couple of games, she sent them outside, and they played basketball¡ªthis time, Clark was clearly missing baskets on purpose. Her heart swelled.

    Just before dinner, and after discussing it with Jonathan, Martha took Lex aside and offered to let him wear his hat in the house, if it would make him more comfortable. He thanked her, but he never put the hat back on.

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    A week into Lex''s stay with them, the four of them settled down in front of a movie. Martha and Jonathan sat on the couch, with Clark snuggled between them, while Lex sat in the rocking chair beside them.

    Martha looked down at the boy under her arm, then over at the one sitting stiffly in the chair. He was so alone. She wished she could do something for him, but he was barely ready to be embraced by them, let alone held. She desperately wanted to invite him to sit with them, to put her arms around him, but she just couldn''t let herself do that. Not yet.

    Clark glanced up at her, then over at Lex. Martha could see it in his eyes¡ªhe was thinking the same thing she was. She tensed and squeezed her younger son, willing him to remain silent rather than embarrassing Lex by pointing out the inequality.

    Clark wriggled away from her grasp, crept over to the rocking chair, and nestled into the narrow space between the armrest and Lex''s side. He tucked himself under Lex''s arm and rested his head on Lex''s chest.

    Martha held her breath, watching the teen react. Lex stiffened at first, his eyebrows raised. Then, as Clark settled in, he relaxed and pulled Clark in a little tighter, resting his cheek on Clark''s hair for a moment before sitting back up and watching the movie.

    Martha''s throat choked up, and she cuddled in closer to Jonathan, watching the boys. Clark fell asleep in minutes. Lex never stopped smiling.

 Chapter 6: Afraid to Sleep

    Lex tossed and turned.

    His first couple of weeks at the Kents had actually been great, but the night before had been terrible. He''d cycled between nightmares about his father getting out of prison and punishing him, to ones where his father stayed in prison forever, to the worst dream he''d ever had¡ªhis father coming back, but punishing Lex by disowning him.

    On Lex''s first night at the Kents, Clark had heard him crying, and called in Mrs. Kent. Lex would never have admitted to anyone but himself that her comfort had been really nice, but he didn''t want to wake anyone up again. He wasn''t that weak.

    He had gotten lucky the night before¡ªno one heard him wake up with a shout¡ªbut he didn''t want to risk anyone hearing this time. Lex decided to avoid closing his eyes until he was sure Clark was sound asleep and wouldn''t overhear his reactions to any future nightmares. The Kents had been nice so far¡ªhe didn''t want to bother them. And aside from a few awkward moments, Clark had been the best part of it all. He didn''t replace Julian, not exactly, but he was everything Lex had wanted out of a little brother.

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    Lex waited until his fatigue began to overwhelm his anxiety, then he let himself close his eyes . . .

    "Lex?"

    Lex shot up in bed. Clark stood in his doorway.

    "Are you asleep?"

    "Not anymore." Lex flicked on the lamp. "What are you doing up?"

    "I don''t want to sleep any more. Do you want to play with me?"

    "Aren''t you supposed to be in bed?"

    "Mom and Dad won''t mind. We just have to be quiet so we don''t wake them up."

    Lex sighed. He wasn''t going to fall asleep anytime soon now, anyway. "What do you want to play?"

    "Have you ever made a blanket fort?"

    It had been a long time. He''d been Clark''s age. His dad had told him he was too old for that. "Once."

    Clark raced into his room and came back with an armful of blankets, the ends trailing behind him. "Can we use your room? It''s cleaner."

    Lex grinned.

 Chapter 7: Blanket Fort

    Clark was not supposed to get up and play after lights out. He used to do it all the time. Dad told him he''d be in trouble if he did it again.

    But neither of them were even tired! As long as they stayed quiet, Mom and Dad wouldn''t know.

    Lex taught Clark how to play a game called Warrior Angel and Devilicus. Lex said was from a comic book. Clark hadn''t heard of it, but it sounded fun. Clark got to pretend to be the hero, while Lex was the evil bad guy, and Clark chased him through the tunnels of the blanket fort to defeat him and save the city.

    "I got you, Devilicus!" Clark grabbed onto Lex''s arm. He kept his voice quiet, so Mom and Dad wouldn''t hear.

    "You will never defeat me!" Lex turned to wrestle him.

    Clark let Lex pin him to the floor. He knew he could beat Lex if he wanted to, but a normal six-year-old couldn''t beat a thirteen-year-old, so Clark had to pretend.

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    Lex seemed really weak, though. Weaker than Pete, actually¡ªand Clark only let Pete win at wrestling about half the time. Maybe Lex was going easy on him on purpose. Clark pushed back gently against Lex''s hands, and found that Lex easily let him up. Clark carefully pushed him to the carpet.

    "Oh no! You''ve defeated me!" Lex whispered.

    "I''m gonna tear down your evil fortress!" Clark jumped onto the blanket fort and rolled around, knocking down the pillows.

    "You haven''t seen the last of me, Warrior Angel! I''ll be back!" Lex crawled over to Clark and started tickling him.

    Clark laughed. A little too loud. He gasped and put his hands over his mouth.

    The door opened a moment later.

    Clark backed up as Dad stepped into the room.

    "Clark, what did we talk about?"

    "I''m sorry! I''m sorry!" He should have listened! He hated being in trouble.

    Lex cleared his throat. "Mr. Kent, I¡ª"

    "You and I will be having a talk about house rules later, Alexander." Dad turned to Clark. "Come on, let''s get you back in bed."

    "But Dad¡ª"

    "Now."

    Clark''s eyes felt watery. He sniffled and picked up his blanket. "Night, Lex."

    "Night," Lex said, but he sounded worried. Clark hoped he wouldn''t get in trouble too.

 Chapter 8: Lashing Out

    Lex sat awake for an entirely different reason, now. His heart felt like it was going to beat straight out of his chest.

    He should have known Clark wasn''t supposed to be out of bed in the middle of the night. Clark was six! Now the Kents were going to be upset with Lex. He didn''t know what they would do to him if he messed up; he''d been hoping he would never find out.

    The door to his room creaked open. "Lex?"

    That was Mrs. Kent''s voice. Lex shot out of bed. "I''m sorry, I didn''t think about¡ª"

    "It''s okay, sweetie. Clark went through a bit of a phase for awhile, where he''d get up in the middle of the night and play, then he''d be cranky the next day. We made it a rule, lights out means lights out. We should have told you."

    "You''re not mad at me?"

    "No, you didn''t know. If it happens again, though¡ª"

    "It won''t, I swear!"

    Mrs. Kent nodded.

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    "Um . . . what other rules do you have?" Lex didn''t want to take any chances.

    "I''m sure it''s not so different from your old home." Mrs. Kent pulled back the covers on the bed, and Lex climbed inside. "Do your chores and homework. Tell the truth and do as we ask. Eat what''s on your plate. Be kind and respectful."

    She was right, it wasn''t really different from home, but it was . . . clear. Lex''s dad tended to make him guess, and Lex got punished if he guessed wrong.

    Mrs. Kent draped the covers over Lex. "If you''re ever not sure about a rule, just ask us. We''ll never get upset with you for asking. We¡ª"

    A sound from next door cut off her sentence. Lex sat straight up and listened¡ªClark was crying.

    Lex''s blood boiled. "What happened to Clark?"

    Mrs. Kent frowned. "Jonathan warned him¡ª"

    "Did Mr. Kent slap him?"

    "No, sweetie."

    "Then why is he crying?"

    "I''m sure he''s upset about being in trouble."

    Lex''s perspective flipped in his head¡ªhe was no longer concerned about the Kents being upset with him. He couldn''t let Clark get punished. "It''s not his fault! I should''ve known better, I''m sorry!"

    Just then, Mr. Kent appeared in the doorway. "Everything okay in here?"

    Lex jumped out of bed. "How could you do that to him?"

    "Do what?"

    "Make him cry like that!"

    Mr. Kent reached toward Lex. "Son¡ª"

    "Don''t call me that!" Lex flinched away.

    Mr. Kent paused, then sighed. "Lex, Clark is okay. He just made a bad choice."

    "No, I did! He''s six, it wasn''t his fault!"

    "Lex¡ª"

    "No!" Lex ran past Mr. Kent out into the hallway, down the stairs, and out the door into the cool open air.

 Chapter 9: Confession

    Jonathan took a deep breath before stepping into the barn. Lex was there, petting the black horse, Onyx.

    "Lex." Jonathan cleared his throat. "Can we talk?"

    "You didn''t have to punish Clark."

    Martha had reminded Jonathan that of all the reasons Lex could be angry with them, this was the best possible scenario¡ªLex was already attached to Clark, enough to be protective. Jonathan came to stand beside Lex. "What do you think I should have done?"

    "Punished me," Lex whispered.

    "You didn''t know the rules."

    "So?"

    "So Clark did."

    "He''s six. He doesn''t deserve . . ." Lex''s voice trailed off. He buried his fingers in the Onyx''s mane.

    Jonathan frowned. Lex probably had no idea what had even happened in Clark''s bedroom. "What would your father have done if you broke his rules?"

    Lex shrugged. "He yelled a lot. Shook me. He sometimes made me hold my arms over my head for an hour."

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    Jonathan''s throat felt dry. Lex had said his father had never beaten him, but Jonathan hadn''t thought to ask what he did do. "Lex . . . we don''t intentionally hurt or humiliate Clark. We usually just take away privileges."

    "My dad does that too. He takes away my hat when I argue. He made me sleep outside a couple of times, when I was up after bedtime. And one time, I stole candy, and he didn''t let me eat for a day."

    Jonathan felt like vomiting. "Those¡ªthose aren''t privileges, Lex." The kid wasn''t covering for Lionel¡ªhe really just didn''t know he was being abused. "We discipline Clark to make him stronger, not weaker."

    "My dad wants me to be stronger, too. I wouldn''t open my eyes in the helicopter because I was afraid, so he didn''t let the pilot land until I looked out of the window. I had an asthma attack the first time, but now I don''t have to close my eyes in the helicopter."

    "That''s horrible."

    Confusion filled Lex''s eyes. "I''m not scared of heights anymore."

    "But you''re terrified of your father."

    "Isn''t Clark terrified of you?"

    "No, he''s not."

    Lex frowned. "What did you do to him?"

    "I told him he has to go to bed before dessert tomorrow. Actually, I think an early bedtime might be good for you, too."

    Lex''s eyebrows shot up. "That''s not even a real punishment. I heard him crying."

    "You''re right. The real punishment was when I told him I was disappointed by his choices. He cried because he felt guilty. But he''s not scared of me, Lex. He knows I love him."

    Lex lowered his hand from Onyx and looked down. "You tell him you love him?"

    "Of course. Every day."

    "Even when he''s in trouble?"

    "Especially then."

    A tear traced its way down Lex''s cheek. He hastily wiped it away.

 Chapter 10: Tears

    Martha waited up in Lex''s room for Jonathan to return with Lex. She wasn''t sure how long to expect to wait, but it was less than twenty minutes before she heard the front door open.

    She peeked out into the hallway to see Jonathan leading Lex up the stairs, hand on his back. "Are you okay, Lex?"

    Lex nodded and wiped his eyes. Jonathan kissed Martha on the forehead, then she smiled at him, and he left Lex with her.

    "Come here." Martha stepped into Lex''s room and pulled back the covers on his bed for the third time that night.

    He climbed under the covers, but unlike the last two times, he held his body stiffly. He almost seemed to be holding his breath.

    She sat on the side of his bed. "Did Jonathan talk to you?"

    A quick nod.

    "So you know Clark is okay?"

    Lex nodded, sniffed, and blinked several times. His eyes were still shiny.

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    Martha recognized that face. He was holding back his tears. Maybe he was too embarrassed to cry in front of her, but she didn''t want him to cry himself to sleep over something she might be able to fix. "Lex, what''s wrong?"

    "Nothing." His voice cracked.

    "Hey, we have a house rule about honesty, remember?"

    "It''s stupid."

    She put her hand on the covers over him. "It''s enough to make you cry."

    "I''m not¡ª" Another voice crack, and he frantically rubbed at his eyes.

    "It''s okay to cry, you know. There''s no shame," she said softly.

    That opened the floodgates. He turned over onto his stomach and buried his face in his pillow, and his shoulders shook with sobs.

    "Oh, sweetheart . . ." Her hand moved up to his head. She stroked the skin the way she would Clark''s hair. She worried for a second that it would embarrass him, but he didn''t try to move away. "It''s okay, let it out."

    He said something in response, but it was muffled by his sobs and pillows.

    "What''s that?"

    Lex turned his head to the side. "My dad used to double my punishments if I cried about them."

    Martha''s jaw dropped in horror. "I¡ªwe''ll never do that. You''ll never be punished for crying." Tantrums were another issue¡ªClark had had his share¡ªbut that didn''t seem to be what this was about. A thought struck her. "Jonathan didn''t punish you, did he?"

    "Not really."

    She sighed in relief. "Do you want to tell me what''s bothering you?"

    "Do I have to?"

    "Not if you don''t want to."

    Lex buried his face again.

    Martha continued to stroke his head. "I love you, sweetie. Jonathan and Clark and I, we all love you so much."

    He cried harder. Her eyes stung, and she pushed back the covers just enough to pull him into her arms.

 Chapter 11: PTSD

    Clark woke up in a bad mood with itchy eyes. He was still sleepy, but the sun was already up, so Dad would probably come wake him up to do chores soon, anyway. Today was going to be a bad day¡ªhe had to go to bed early tonight. He buried his face in his pillow, groaning.

    When he quieted down, he heard something from next door. It sounded like singing.

    Clark tiptoed over into Lex''s room. Lex was sitting on the chair in the corner, rocking a rolled up blanket in his arms, singing a lullaby.

    "What are you doing?" Clark asked.

    Lex looked up. "Shh. You''ll wake him."

    "Who?"

    "Julian."

    "Who''s Julian?"

    "My baby brother."

    "You have a baby brother?"

    "Yeah. See?" Lex lowered the blanket a little.

    "Oh!" Clark petted the blanket gently. It was another game, like Warrior Angel. "So who are you?"

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    Lex gave him a funny look. "You know me. I''m Lex."

    "Oh." This didn''t sound like a very fun game, but Clark still wanted to play with Lex. "Can I play?"

    "Not right now. He''s sleeping."

    "That''s okay." His kindergarten teacher told him sometimes he had to play what other people wanted to play, even if it sounded boring. "I can sleep. You can sing to me if you want."

    "You''re not Julian."

    Clark frowned. "I could be."

    Lex looked up and stared at Clark. He looked kind of angry.

    "Here." Clark took the blanket away.

    "No, no!" Lex tried to pull it back, but the blanket unravelled. His eyes went wide. "Julian!"

    This was a really weird game. "Are you okay?"

    "No!" Lex shoved Clark backwards and knelt down on the floor, searching through the blanket. The shove didn''t hurt, but it made Clark want to cry.

    But there were already tears on Lex''s face. Clark came closer and patted his back. "It''s okay."

    "Julian."

    "Here." Clark bundled up the blanket and tried to give it to Lex.

    Lex shook his head, crying. "He''s dead."

    "I killed him?"

    "No. I did."

    Lex sounded so sad! He really wanted to play this game, and Clark messed it up. Maybe they could fix it.

    Clark unravelled the blanket again and wrapped it around himself. "Go sit on the chair."

    Lex wiped away his tears. He looked confused, but he sat down.

    Clark climbed onto his lap with the blanket around him. "Do you want to sing?"

    Lex put his arms the way he had them before, and Clark laid back. Lex looked really sad.

    "What''s wrong?"

    "You''re still not my brother."

    "But I could be."

    Lex tightened his arms around Clark. After a long pause, he started singing again.

    It didn''t sound very good, and it wasn''t very fun, but it was comfy, and Clark was still tired from last night. He closed his eyes, tucked his face against Lex''s shirt, and fell asleep.

 Chapter 12: Exhaustion

    For the first two weeks Lex was with the Kents, he did absolutely everything he was asked, with no complaint. Jonathan had been told to expect a honeymoon phase followed by a testing period, but those two weeks still put him off his guard¡ªwhen Lex did act up, Jonathan forgot that he was supposed to be expecting the kid to test them sooner or later.

    Lex had to be pestered four times to get out of bed, and three times to begin his chores. He groaned and rolled his eyes at everything Jonathan asked him to do.

    At lunchtime, he wandered away from the table without clearing his place. Martha reminded him gently, "Take your plate to the sink, Lex."

    "Do it yourself," he muttered.

    Jonathan deepened his voice. "Up to your room."

    "You can''t tell me what to do."

    "Now."

    Lex smirked. "Yes, Dad." And he headed up the stairs.

    Jonathan counted to ten in his head. Then he counted again. He turned to Martha, who shook her head.

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    "He''s testing you, honey," she said. "Go find out what he needs."

    Jonathan took the stairs slowly. The door to Lex''s bedroom was closed. Jonathan knocked, to no answer. He opened it to find Lex sitting on his bed, knees pulled into his chest.

    Jonathan swallowed hard, then went over to sit next to Lex. "What''s gotten into you today, son?"

    "Miss my dad."

    "Is this how he''d want you to behave?"

    "Not for him."

    Jonathan tried not to groan. "Is this how he''d want you to behave for me?"

    Lex stared at his knees and shrugged.

    "Has Martha done something to upset you?"

    "No," he mumbled.

    "Look at me, Lex." Jonathan waited for him to look up. "You''re going to go downstairs and apologize to Martha, thank her for making lunch, and offer to help with the dishes."

    His eyes dropped to his knees. "What if I don''t?"

    "Then you''re going to spend the afternoon doing more chores instead of relaxing with Clark."

    "What if I say no?"

    "Then you can spend the rest of the afternoon and evening in your room."

    "You can''t force me."

    "Look me in the eyes and say that again."

    Lex''s jaw pulsed, but he didn''t look up.

    "Where''d this come from, Lex? Is this the game you wanna play? Hm? You''re gonna fight me on everything I say? That''s the example you want to set for Clark?"

    "Guess you''ll just have to get rid of me, then."

    "What on earth gave you that idea?"

    Lex wiped his eyes, and Jonathan suddenly realized how swollen and red they were.

    "You haven''t been sleeping well."

    Lex shrugged.

    Jonathan sighed. "Go apologize to Martha and thank her for lunch, then come back up here. You''re going to take a nap."

    Lex grumbled, but he started walking toward the door.

 Chapter 13: Embrace

    When Lex woke up from his nap, he remembered everything he''d said to Mr. Kent, and his heart nearly pounded out of his chest.

    The worst part was that he realized he was actually more scared of getting kicked out of the Kent house than of anything else. Somehow, against his own will, he had come to like staying with them.

    He trudged down into the kitchen, which was empty. He checked the living room, and found Mrs. Kent playing a game with Clark.

    Lex cleared his throat.

    Mrs. Kent stood and took a step toward him. "Feeling any better?"

    He nodded. "I really am sorry."

    "I know, sweetie. I''m not angry. Why don''t you go talk to Jonathan? He''s out in the barn."

    The adrenaline in Lex''s veins redoubled, but he forced himself to walk out to the barn to take whatever he had coming. He stepped inside to find Mr. Kent repairing a broken piece of machinery. He set it aside and faced Lex when he came in.

    His throat suddenly felt dry. "I¡ªI''m sorry, sir."

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    "For?"

    "Being disrespectful."

    "And?"

    Lex''s mind raced. "Uh . . ."

    "Not letting us know you weren''t sleeping."

    Lex blinked a few times¡ªhe couldn''t have possibly known he was supposed to let them know that, but then, his father had never told him what punishable offenses were; why should the Kents? "Oh."

    "If you''re tired or needing something, I want you to let us know."

    "I''m sorry."

    "What''s been keeping you awake?"

    "Ah . . ." Lex''s father always told him not to make excuses. "I dunno."

    "Nightmares?"

    Mr. Kent didn''t seem like the kind of man who would appreciate lying. "Yes, sir."

    "If they ever get bad, you''re free to wake us up, you know. We''re here to help you."

    He swallowed hard. That sounded like a trap if he''d ever heard one, but he didn''t know how to respond. "Okay. Sorry, Mr. Kent."

    "Okay. I accept your apology. But I don''t want this to happen again."

    "I understand, sir." Lex braced for the punishment. Mr. Kent took a step forward and reached toward him, and Lex''s muscles tightened.

    Mr. Kent''s arms wrapped around him tightly.

    Lex''s dad had hugged him before. But never like this. Mr. Kent wasn''t just stronger than Lex''s dad; he put his strength into it. Before Lex lost his hair, his father had only ever touched him affectionately while his mother was watching, seemingly out of obligation; after, he always seemed disgusted with Lex. Lex sensed nothing from Mr. Kent but affection, comfort, and confidence.

    It felt so good. If only Lex could convince his body to stop tensing up.

    Mr. Kent looked Lex in the eyes after letting go. "You are forgiven. We''re not sending you away, Lex. No matter what you do."

    Lex let himself smile.

 Chapter 14: Magic

    It all happened so fast!

    Clark and Lex had been racing. Clark was supposed to let his friends win races, but Lex was trying to go slow to let Clark win, too, so Clark started running a little faster on the driveway, and Lex had tripped and scraped up his knee. He wasn''t bleeding, but his eyes were squeezed closed.

    "Can you stand up?" Clark asked.

    Lex tried to put weight on his leg, but he groaned and sat back down. "Give me a minute."

    Clark would have just carried him into the house to get Mom''s help, but he wasn''t sure if Lex was supposed to know about his powers yet. Instead, he ran as fast as he thought Pete probably could into the house. "Mom!"

    Mom looked up from the laundry she was folding. "What''s wrong?"

    "Lex fell down!"

    "Okay, I''m coming." She went to get her first aid kit, then she followed Clark out into the driveway.

    She sat down across from Lex and looked at his knee. "Oo, that looks like it stings."

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    "I''m really fine."

    "That''s good. I''m just going to clean it, okay?" She took out one of those little wipes in the paper packet¡ªPete''s mom once used one on him, and Pete cried because it hurt so bad. Clark hoped it wouldn''t hurt too much, since Lex was a big kid.

    "No, no, I''m fine." Lex pulled back.

    Mom gave Lex a strict look. "I''m not going to let you get an infection. Let me see."

    Lex sighed and straightened his leg. She cleaned the scrape. Lex didn''t cry, but he looked like he wanted to.

    "There," Mom said. "That''s better."

    Clark frowned. "No, it''s not!"

    "Well, it''s going to take a little while to heal completely, but¡ª"

    "But you have to kiss it to make it better!"

    Lex''s face turned pink, and so did Mom''s. "I already cleaned it, I don''t want to spread any more germs," she said.

    "But you have to! It''s like medicine." Clark stomped his foot. "At least kiss his forehead!"

    "Do you want to give him a kiss on the forehead, Clark?"

    "No, I don''t have Mom magic!"

    Lex laughed. Mom looked over at Lex. "Do you mind?"

    "I don''t mind."

    She reached over and kissed Lex on the forehead, then gave him a quick hug.

    Clark bounced on his toes. "Can you get up now?"

    "I think so." Lex used Mom''s arm to help him, but he stood up.

    "Yay!" Clark clapped. "See? I told you it works! Can we play more?"

    Lex smiled, and Mom went back inside.

    Lex''s knee was completely back to normal by the time they went inside for dinner. That was really fast healing, compared to Clark''s other friends when they had scrapes. Clark knew his Mom had the best magic kisses.

 Chapter 15: Swing

    Lex stood awkwardly off to the side of the playground while Clark climbed around on the slides with the other kids. Lex was much too old to be playing with them, but he was also too young to make conversation with the adults¡ªMrs. Kent was chatting with other parents. Lex wished he''d stayed behind and helped Mr. Kent with more chores, but Clark had insisted he wanted Lex to come. And Lex''s therapist had encouraged him to spend as much time with Clark as he could.

    Clark raced over to him. "Can you push me on the swing?"

    Lex raised an eyebrow. "Can''t you get it going yourself?"

    "It''s more fun when someone pushes." Clark pouted.

    "Okay." It was better than standing around.

    The swings were all taken, so Clark stood off to the side and waited. Lex stood a few feet from him, shifting his weight a little as he watched.

    It felt like ten minutes had passed before a kid jumped down. Clark skipped over to the swing, but some girl raced in from the slides and cut in front of him.

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    Clark took a step back. His eyes grew shiny, and his lower lip trembled.

    Lex could hear his pulse in his ears. His mind flashed back to the day he returned to school after he''d lost his hair. Kids who he''d played with the week before dismissed him, refusing to give him a turn on the playground, isolating him, ignoring him.

    And now, this girl had done the same thing to Clark. Made him feel the same way.

    Lex was going to destroy that kid.

    His fists clenched. He made it all of one step toward the swing when a firm hand on his shoulder stopped him.

    He turned around. "Mrs. Kent, did you see¡ª"

    "I know. They don''t know better. Go take care of your little brother."

    Lex breathed in to correct her¡ªhe shouldn''t be thinking of Clark as a brother, not if he was going to have to go home to his father¡ªbut as Lex looked over at Clark''s teary eyes, he realized there was nothing to correct. Clark was his brother, in every way that mattered.

    "Yes, ma''am," Lex said, and he went over and knelt down beside Clark, wrapping his arms around him and patting his back. "It''s okay," he whispered.

    Clark sniffed and hugged back tightly, and Lex relaxed into his little brother''s trusting arms. Lex couldn''t be fighting with other kids at the playground. Clark looked up to him as a role model; Lex had to work hard to make sure he deserved that.

    It was less than a minute before another swing opened up. Lex pushed Clark as high as he could get the swing to go until Mrs. Kent said it was time to go home. Clark''s shrieks of laughter made Lex''s chest feel so full, it almost hurt.

 Chapter 16: Therapy Pet

    When the Kents first adopted Clark, it had taken Jonathan a few months to feel like Clark was his son. Jonathan had expected that it would take him a little while to connect with Lex.

    But Lex wasn''t what Jonathan had expected. He wasn''t like Lionel at all, he wasn''t rebellious, and because of Clark, Jonathan already thought of himself as a dad. For Jonathan, the biggest remaining obstacle to feeling like Lex was his son was that Lex seemed to have no interest in connecting with him. Lex clearly adored Clark like a brother, and he seemed to like Martha, but for the most part, he shied away from Jonathan.

    With Martha''s advice, and after a talk with Lex''s therapist, Jonathan set out to change that. He stood across from Lex beside Onyx''s stall. "How are you doing, Lex?"

    "I''m fine," he said.

    Jonathan nodded. "How are you liking the farm?"

    "I miss my dad. But I like Clark."

    "I''m glad you''re okay with entertaining him."

    Lex smiled.

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    "It''s been nice to see you working so hard with the animals, too."

    "I like the horses."

    "I know. Come in here with me." He stepped into the stall with Onyx, and Lex followed.

    Onyx poked her nose at Lex''s arm. Lex smiled and reached around to stroke her neck.

    Jonathan chuckled. "She''s looking for this." He handed Lex a sugar cube.

    Lex held the sugar in his flat hand, and Onyx licked it up, then pressed her head against Lex''s shoulder.

    Jonathan couldn''t help but smile. "She likes you. Here, use this." Jonathan picked up a curry comb and handed it to Lex. "Circular motions."

    "I know." Lex went to work. "She''s my favorite. Can I ride her?"

    "I don''t see why not. Seeing as she''s yours."

    Lex''s hand stopped suddenly, and he looked up at Jonathan. "What?"

    "You heard me."

    "But . . . but what about when my dad gets out of jail?"

    Jonathan swallowed hard and took a gamble¡ªhe was certain Lionel would be given a long, long sentence, but if Jonathan was going to make this promise, he would have to follow through even if he turned out to be wrong. "Do you have stables?"

    "Uh . . . yes."

    "You''d take good care of her?"

    "Yes."

    "If your father gets out of prison, and if he''s okay with it, you can still keep Onyx."

    Lex smiled wider than Jonathan had ever seen, and he wrapped his arms lightly around Onyx''s neck. "Thank you, Mr. Kent."

    "Hey." Jonathan waited for Lex to look up at him. "Call us Martha and Jonathan?"

    Lex frowned for a moment, then nodded. "Yes, sir. I mean . . . thanks, Jonathan." He leaned against Onyx''s side again, and his eyes fell closed.

    Jonathan gave Lex''s shoulder a quick squeeze, then he went to tend to the other horses.

 Chapter 17: Baking

    "So it''s not a work trip?" Lex asked.

    "No," Martha said. "It''s just for fun."

    "Can we take Onyx?"

    "She''ll be happier here. You can give her extra attention when we get back."

    Lex''s dad took him on trips all the time. They were always about business. But the Kents were going camping. They had even hired some people to look after the farm while they were gone.

    Lex sat at the kitchen table, watching Martha getting out the ingredients for chocolate chip cookies. Clark had already gone to bed, but Martha said Lex could stay up two hours later, since he was older. Lex was thankful for that, since Clark''s bedtime was 7:30.

    "Are you going to come help me bake these?" Martha asked.

    "I''ve never baked before," he said. So far, Martha had asked him to keep his room clean and his bed made, and to help around the house a little in addition to the farm chores, but she hadn''t asked him to help with making food.

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    Her eyes looked sad. "You don''t have to. But I think it''s fun."

    "I''ll probably mess it up." The cook at his old house was always yelling at Lex for getting underfoot. Eventually he learned to stay out of the kitchen.

    "I''ll be right here to help you. But if we mess it up, we can make a second batch."

    Lex shrugged and got up from the table. "What do I do?"

    Martha taught him how to grease the cookie sheet, crack the eggs, measure the wet and dry ingredients separately, and mix them together. They rolled the dough into balls, and she put them in the oven.

    While Martha took a break to check on Clark, Jonathan came into the kitchen, took two spoons out of the drawer, and scooped out some of the leftover raw dough onto each, handing one to Lex and holding his finger to his lips. Lex skeptically watched him eat the raw dough before trying it himself.

    It was a new type of happiness. It was soft and sweet, he could taste the brown sugar, and it almost melted in his mouth. He didn''t see the point in baking the dough.

    Martha caught them when she came into the room, and she swatted at Jonathan with a dish towel for being a bad influence. Lex backed up when Martha first started yelling, but laughed as soon as he realized they were playing. He blushed when they kissed¡ªhe''d hadn''t really seen his parents act that way, even before Julian¡ªbut took the opportunity to sneak a second spoonful of cookie dough.

    The fully baked cookies were the best Lex had ever had in his life, even though Martha limited him to two. She said he could have three next time, if he didn''t eat the dough. It didn''t sound worth it to him.

 Chapter 18: Road Trip

    "Are we there yet?"

    Martha held back her groans. It was the fiftieth time Clark had asked.

    "No, we''re not." Lex sounded as exasperated as she felt, but she wouldn''t have used that tone with her six-year-old.

    "I just wanna know if we''re there!"

    "If we were there, we wouldn''t still be driving."

    That was the first time Martha had ever heard Lex lose his temper with Clark. She knew the seats in the back of the truck were cramped, but the kids were driving her crazy.

    "Alexander," Jonathan said firmly, "be nice to your brother. Clark, behave."

    "He''s bein'' mean." Clark pouted.

    Lex scoffed. "You''re being stupid."

    Martha breathed in to scold Lex, but then Clark punched Lex in the arm. By the look on Lex''s face, it hurt, too.

    "OUT."

    The intensity of Martha''s voice brought silence over the family. Jonathan pulled over.

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    She got out of the passenger side, opened the back door, and said, "Both of you. Out."

    Clark climbed out first, whining a little. Lex''s eyes were wide, body stiff.

    Martha walked Clark over to one of the trees by the side of the road and faced him towards it. "Don''t move," she said. She went back over to Lex, who flinched away from her reach, so she instead pointed to a tree a few feet from Clark''s. "Face that one."

    Lex trudged over to the tree, his head hung.

    With that, Martha got back into the truck.

    "You okay?" Jonathan asked.

    "Just needed a few minutes of quiet."

    He nodded.

    She silently counted backwards from one hundred, whispered a prayer for patience, then called, "Boys, back in the car."

    They obeyed silently. Lex''s face was bright red, Clark''s streaked with tears. Martha felt like a monster, but Lex was getting off light for calling Clark stupid, and Clark was getting off very light for hitting Lex.

    As Jonathan pulled away, Martha reached into her purse and pulled out two rolls of quarters, handing one to each of her boys. "Now," she said, "every time you fight, you both lose a quarter."

    "Quarters?" Lex said. "Are you kidding me? My dad¡ª"

    She reached back and took one from each of them. "That includes fighting with me."

    Tears spilled from Clark''s eyes again, and he frowned at Lex, lower lip trembling.

    Lex winced. "Sorry, Martha. But . . . it''s not really fair¡ª"

    "You still want to argue with me?"

    "No, ma''am." Lex sighed.

    "You each still have the rest of the roll. Do better next time."

    She looked back at the road, but kept watching them through the rearview mirror. Clark crossed his arms and looked down, sniffling. Lex tapped Clark on the shoulder, then handed him two of his quarters. Clark grinned, and Lex smiled back and wiped his little brother''s tears away.

    Jonathan squeezed Martha''s hand and winked at her. She kissed his hand.

 Chapter 19: Campfire

    Clark didn''t fight with Lex for the rest of the trip. He didn''t want to lose his quarters or get in trouble again. He hated being in trouble.

    But it was okay that they fought. Pete said he fought with his brothers all the time.

    If they were really brothers . . . Clark could tell Lex about his powers, right? Mom and Dad could know because they were his family, too, so they would never let the bad scientists find out. Lex wouldn''t, either. He was Clark''s brother! Dad said so, in the car.

    Mom and Dad went to set up the tent while Clark and Lex sat by the campfire. It wasn''t dark yet, but it was cold.

    "Hey Lex, look what I can do!"

    "I''m watching," Lex said.

    Clark jumped up from the log and put his hand into the fire. Lex''s leapt forward and yanked Clark back.

    "Clark! Are you okay?" Lex took Clark''s hand and looked it over.

    "I''m fine! I have powers. Like Warrior Angel!"

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    Lex''s face went very white. He didn''t look like he was breathing.

    Clark frowned. He thought it was cool. "You love Warrior Angel."

    "I . . . I . . ."

    "I''m really fast too!" Clark sped away into the trees as fast as he could, then he came back. "And really strong!" He picked up the log across from Lex. "See?"

    Clark stepped toward Lex, but Lex leaned back and fell from the log he was sitting on.

    Clark raced to look over Lex. "What''s wrong?"

    "Y-you''re . . . what are you?"

    "I''m your little brother! That''s why I get to tell you my secrets."

    Lex didn''t get up from the ground. He just kept staring at Clark.

    Maybe he didn''t understand. "Dad says if I tell someone who''s not in my family my secret, the bad scientiss will find out and do spearmints on me."

    "Experiments?"

    Clark nodded. "But you won''t tell anyone, right?"

    "I¡ªI won''t . . ."

    "Good!" Clark picked up Lex and put him back on the log. "You''re really light."

    Lex still looked really scared.

    "What''s wrong?" Clark thought Lex would be excited. Clark was like Warrior Angel! Now they could play that game for real.

    Dad came back over to the campfire. "Tent''s up. You boys hungry?"

    "Yeah!" Clark said, but Lex was still frozen.

    Dad frowned. "Everything okay, Lex?"

    "I . . . do you know? What Clark can do?"

    Dad''s eyes became angry. "Clark! What did you do?"

    "I told him my powers."

    "Clark!"

    "He''s my brother! I heard you say!"

    "Go over to the tent with your mother. We need to talk."

    "Am I in trouble?"

    "What do you think?"

    That meant yes! "Daaad! Nooo!"

    "Go."

    "Sir," Lex said, "it''s okay."

    "That''s not for you to decide," Dad said to Lex. He gave Clark a hard pat on the back. "Go."

 Chapter 20: Protective

    Lex sat staring at the campfire, his mind racing and frozen at the same time.

    Superpowers were real.

    Well, maybe not superpowers. But something supernatural. Maybe alien. Mutation? Magic? Lex supposed it didn''t really matter. Whatever it was, it was real, and Clark had it. It was a shift in Lex''s view of the whole world. Impossible things were possible.

    But as he settled into his new frame of mind, Lex found it didn''t really change much about the way Lex thought about Clark himself. Clark was still . . . Clark. He happened to be able to lift several times his own weight and run faster than an Olympic sprinter, but that didn''t change who he was. He was still the kid who called for help from his parents whenever Lex was hurt or scared, who fell asleep in Lex''s arms in front of the TV, and who trusted Lex to be someone he could look up to.

    Lex could hear raised voice from the tent¡ªJonathan scolding, and Clark crying. Everything in Lex wanted to get up and storm over there and save his little brother, to wrap his arms around him, to fight off Jonathan if he had to. Even if it got him kicked out of their family.

    But as he thought about it, he also understood exactly why Martha and Jonathan were so upset. They''d probably drilled secrecy into Clark since he was old enough to talk, and for good reason. Lex could imagine exactly what someone like his father would do with information about a being with those kinds of abilities. Clark had to be protected.

    And Martha and Jonathan protected him. Lex had seen firsthand how much they adored him. Even now, as they scolded him, Lex could hear the worried tones in Jonathan''s voice, the frantic pitch of Martha''s. They were angry because they loved him.

    Lex frowned as he continued to listen to their scolding. If they were mad at Clark, that meant they were trying to protect Clark from Lex, too.

    They didn''t have to worry. Lex would never let anyone hurt Clark. If he went back to his father, he''d never tell him Clark''s secrets.

    Lex could prove they didn''t have to be afraid of him. He could be the best older brother in the world. The best son in the world. He could earn their trust, so they didn''t feel like they had to protect Clark from him. Instead, he could help them protect Clark.

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    The Kents were a second chance, a fresh start. Lex had failed Julian, and he''d failed his real mother and father, but here, he could try again.

    And this time, he would not fail.

    <hr>

    Jonathan took a deep breath as he walked over to sit down next to Lex on the log beside the campfire.

    He couldn''t believe Clark had been so careless. Well, yes, he could believe it¡ªClark was six¡ªbut he''d shown no warnings that he might do this. He hadn''t even talked to his parents. He''d just done exactly what Jonathan had warned him against.

    Clark had told the son of Lionel Luthor his secrets.

    Jonathan willed himself to calm down, and in the silence, he could hear Lex''s breathing starting to slow down as well. Jonathan looked over at the boy, and it struck him that he wasn''t seeing the son of Lionel at all. Lex was his own person. And the boy was terrified.

    "Lex . . ."

    "I wasn''t supposed to know about Clark, was I?"

    "It''s not that. We were going to tell you, but we were going to wait until the adoption was finalized."

    Lex looked away.

    The boy was silent for a long time. Long enough that Jonathan started to worry. "Lex?"

    "You really don''t think my father is getting out of prison."

    Jonathan let his eyes fall closed. "I''m sorry."

    Lex turned to face Jonathan. "I love Clark, you know."

    Jonathan nodded, though he didn''t feel the boy was old enough to really know what love was.

    "He said you were worried people would find out and take him to do experiments on him," Lex said

    "We worry about that every day."

    "My father . . . he''s the kind of person who would do that."

    Jonathan knew that must have been nearly impossible for the boy to admit, but it didn''t make him feel any better to hear it.

    "I''m not my father."

    "I know you''re not."

    "No, you . . ." Lex looked away for a moment before his eyes pierced Jonathan''s. "I would never let anything happen to Clark. I''d do anything to protect him. I would die."

    So Jonathan had been wrong. Lex did know what love was. "Well, I''m not asking for that, Lex."

    "You don''t understand." His stare became even more piercing. "My baby brother died. I''m not letting another brother die. I . . . I want to stay with you. To help protect Clark. I''ll tell the courts the truth about my father, I''ll do whatever I have to do . . ."

    Jonathan''s heart pounded again. "Thank you." Jonathan slid closer to Lex and wrapped an arm around the boy''s shoulders. "Thank you, my son."

    Jonathan couldn''t let Clark think what he''d done was okay in general¡ªhe needed to talk to his parents before letting people know his secret¡ªbut this time, Clark''s instincts had been right. That innocent honesty was what their family had needed.

 Chapter 21: Flashbacks

    The next morning, Martha stayed back with Lex at the campground while Jonathan took Clark fishing. Jonathan had meant to take Lex with him, but one look at Lex''s face told them that he wasn''t really interested in fishing.

    After picking up the garbage from breakfast, Martha and Lex went for a slow walk around the lake. She wanted to bring up Clark''s secret again, but she also wanted to give Lex the freedom to talk about whatever was on his mind, so she kept quiet, letting him to be the first to speak. Thankfully, it was early enough in the morning that the trail was empty.

    It took almost ten minutes. "Jonathan said you wanted to adopt me," he said.

    "We do."

    "Why?"

    Her voice caught. "Because we want you to be part of our family. We love you, sweetheart."

    She expected an influx of questions, but he didn''t say anything at all. That was okay with her. If he needed time to process, she was happy to give it.

    It was almost another full ten minutes before he replied. "Can you help me with my testimony?"

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    "We were planning on it." She frowned, unsure how to ask whether he was still trying to get his father out of prison. "It must be hard. Whatever''s happened between you and your dad, I know you still love each other."

    Lex shook his head. "I love my dad, but . . . I killed my brother, Martha. It was an accident, but I still did it."

    Every part of her wanted to gasp and question him, but she forced herself to remain calm for him. "Does your dad know it was an accident?"

    "I told him."

    She was almost afraid to ask, but she made herself anyway. "What did he say?"

    His voice came out as a whisper: "He hit me in the face."

    Hot anger flooded through her limbs. She was sure her face turned bright red, but she did the best she could to remain calm.

    Lex''s eyes fell closed, and he stopped walking. It was almost surreal to watch his facial expressions¡ªit was like he was being pulled back to that moment.

    "Lex?"

    No response.

    Martha took his shoulders in her hands. "Lex, can you hear me?"

    His eyelids fluttered, and tears traced their way down his cheeks, though his eyes remained closed.

    "Hey." She shook him slightly. "Hey." She lightly tapped the side of his head with two fingers.

    He cried out and flinched away like she had struck him. His eyes opened and darted around, as if he didn''t know where he was.

    She gently cradled his cheek in her hand, looking him in the eyes. "Sweetheart. Are you okay?"

    Lex shook his head. "No." A couple of quiet sobs shook his body, and his head hung.

    She reached out took him into her arms. She didn''t even try to stop her own tears.

 Chapter 22: Junk Food

    Clark was a little bit sad when he came back to the campground after fishing, especially when Lex asked him, "Did you catch any fish?"

    "No," Clark said. "Because Dad wouldn''t let me use my powers."

    "How would you use your powers to catch fish?"

    "I would just swim and go get them!" Clark laughed.

    "Your speed works under water?"

    "Yeah!" It was really fun to talk to someone about his powers.

    Lex looked impressed. "How strong are you?"

    "I can almost pick up Dad''s truck! And I can run faster than it."

    "Wow!"

    Clark bounced on his toes. "Mom says I get stronger every year."

    "That''s amazing. So, you can win any contest you want."

    Clark frowned. "I''m not allowed to win contests. Otherwise the bad scientiss will find out."

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    "Oh. Well, have you tried to do anything else with your powers? Like, when no one else was watching?"

    No one had ever asked him that. "Uh . . . I can hold my breath for a really long time. And I never ever get sick or scrape my knee. And I can eat super spicy foods."

    "How much can you eat?"

    "Oh!" Clark''s eyes widened. "Mom always says I eat a lot! Maybe it''s one of my powers?"

    Lex glanced over his shoulder at Mom and Dad, who were starting to make dinner. Lex put a finger to his lips, then he went over to the food box and grabbed a bag of marshmallows. "Let''s find out."

    Clark ripped open the bag and started eating the marshmallows. Lex ate a few, but Clark was able to eat the whole bag.

    "Wow!" Lex laughed and held up the empty bag. "You do have eating powers!"

    But Clark wasn''t feeling as sure. He was really dizzy, and his tummy hurt. He almost never had to feel pain¡ªit was horrible.

    Then he felt like something was in his throat, and he started throwing up in the dirt.

    He had never thrown up before. It was terrible! It felt like he couldn''t control his body, and it was the worst thing he''d ever tasted.

    Mom came running over. "Clark! What happened?"

    Lex held up the empty marshmallow bag. "I¡ªI''m so sorry, it''s my fault."

    "I don''t have eating powers," Clark said. His eyes were watery, and his head hurt.

    Mom''s face looked very angry. "Clark Jerome Kent. No more sweets for you for the rest of the day, do you hear me?"

    "Okay." He didn''t want any more, anyway.

    "You too, Alexander Luthor. You should be setting a better example for your brother."

    Lex sighed. "Yes, ma''am."

    She gave a slight smile. "Okay, boys. Go wash up for dinner."

    Clark thought he might throw up again, but as soon as Mom''s back was turned, Lex laughed a little. "Sorry about that. But . . . you''re the coolest brother ever," he whispered.

    Clark grinned.

 Chapter 23: Hot Cocoa

    On the last night of the camping trip, Jonathan passed around hot chocolate packets and boiled water over the campfire. Clark had already fallen asleep, curled up on his folding chair.

    They''d be heading back to the farm in the morning. And tomorrow afternoon was Lionel''s trial.

    "Are you feeling ready?" Jonathan asked Lex. "Anything you want to go over again?"

    The boy shrugged, his hand frozen holding the thermos, eyes glazed over and staring at the fire.

    "Hey." Martha put a hand on his arm, and he looked up at her. "What''s on your mind, sweetie?"

    "What if I mess up?"

    Jonathan wasn''t sure whether Lex thought "messing up" would mean Lionel ended up in jail for a long time, or if it meant Lionel was released. So he just said, "Just tell the truth, son."

    He shifted in his seat. "What''s going to happen to him?"

    Jonathan let out his breath. His six-year-old son had had an easier time with honesty than Jonathan was having now. "I think he''ll be sentenced for child abuse."

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    "But he doesn''t abuse me."

    "Son¡ª"

    "My mom did all the same things he did. They both took away privileges, like you do with Clark. My mom even swatted me sometimes. What''s the difference?"

    Jonathan exchanged a glance with Martha and carefully considered his next words. In some ways, this would be so much easier if Lionel had simply beaten the boy. They could promise they''d never do the same and leave it at that.

    He looked Lex right in the eyes. "Son . . . Martha''s mother sometimes sent her to bed without dinner. It wasn''t ideal, but it''s still very different from not letting you eat for a whole day. I''ve heard of parents not letting their 17-year-old kid into the house after they miss curfew one too many times. But that''s not the same as making a young child sleep outside for being up after bedtime. And standing in the corner is one thing, but an hour with your hands over your head . . ."

    Lex''s eyes were fixed on Jonathan, hanging on his every word.

    Jonathan swallowed hard. "My father . . . took me out to the woodshed, a few times. I hated it. But he never would have punished me for something that was an accident. And he never would have . . . I dunno, shoved me into a display case. If I ever tripped and fell into one, he would have called an ambulance, not a neighbor who overheard me screaming. He wasn''t perfect, but he never, ever made me wonder whether he loved me. We never make Clark wonder, either."

    Lex''s eyes grew shiny.

    "When your mom disciplined you, did she still love you?"

    "Yes . . ." Lex''s head dropped.

    Jonathan didn''t need to ask the same question about Lionel. He could already see the answer in Lex''s eyes.

 Chapter 24: Panic Attacks

    Jonathan spent the evening after driving home unpacking the truck. Martha helped him with some of the unloading, but she was tired, and she went to bed shortly after the kids did.

    Jonathan couldn''t sleep. Lionel Luthor''s trial was tomorrow, and Lex had to give his testimony.

    Everything would turn out alright, Jonathan was sure. He was fairly confident he''d managed to get through to the boy, but there was a lot riding on Lex''s shoulders. The incident that had gotten Lionel arrested had truly been an accident. If Lex wasn''t honest about what his home life was really like, Lionel might walk.

    The thought of sending Lex back to Lionel made Jonathan feel physically ill. Lex already knew Clark''s secret, but Jonathan found that that wasn''t causing him as much distress as the thought of losing Lex. Somehow, he trusted the boy. He was worried about Lex''s safety.

    Jonathan tossed and turned through the night. The next morning, when he went to wake up Lex, he found him sitting up in bed, knees pulled into his chest, rocking and breathing hard.

    "Lex?" Jonathan raced over to sit beside him. "Talk to me, son."

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    "W-what if . . . what if . . . what¡ª"

    "Look at me. Breathe. Breathe."

    Lex took a few slower breaths, then began to hyperventilate again.

    Jonathan put a hand on the boy''s back. Lex flinched violently at the contact, but then took a couple of longer, slower breaths.

    "Lex," Jonathan said. "Look at me."

    Lex pried his eyes open and looked up into Jonathan''s eyes.

    "What''s on your mind?"

    "What¡ªwhat if I testify against my father, but they still let him go? If he knows I tried to get him in prison . . . he''s¡ªhe''s gonna . . ."

    Jonathan''s heart sank. "That''s not going to happen, Alexander."

    "I¡ªI don''t want to do this."

    Jonathan cradled Lex''s face in his hand and said some of the scariest words he''d ever had to say: "No one''s forcing you, son."

    "I . . . I don''t know if I''m brave enough."

    "Maybe you don''t feel brave. But bravery isn''t a feeling. It''s a choice."

    Lex swallowed hard. "If I don''t do this, do I have to go back to him?"

    Jonathan squeezed his eyes shut and rubbed his forehead. He and Martha could fight this. Jonathan was sure that Lionel was guilty of quite a few more crimes than abusing Lex¡ªmaybe they could get him put away. It would be very, very difficult without Lex''s testimony, but . . . "I''m never going to let him hurt you again."

    Lex nodded, and he straightened up a little. "I''ll go to the trial. I''m going to be brave."

    Jonathan''s heart swelled, and his throat choked. He pulled Lex into his arms. "I am so, so proud of you," he whispered.

 Chapter 25: Memory Lane

    Lex had put on the best clothes he had left from his old life for the trial, and Martha drove him to the courthouse. On the drive over, his heart pounded so hard he felt like electricity was running through his arms and legs. He didn''t know how he would walk into the building, but when Martha took his hand, he found he was able to breathe again.

    But one look at his father''s face called everything into question again. His mind flooded with fear and reverence, respect and adoration, love and desperation.

    He couldn''t lose his dad. No matter what the Kents had said.

    "My dad didn''t hurt me. I lied to him," he told the courtroom. "He was trying to get me to tell the truth, and I backed away and tripped and fell. That''s how I got hurt. It was an accident. I screamed, and the neighbors heard, and . . ."

    Lex''s voice trailed off, and his mind wandered to the conversation he''d had with the Kents the day before. Jonathan''s words floated to the forefront of his consciousness:

    He wasn''t perfect, but he never, ever made me wonder whether he loved me.

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    Lex didn''t mean to say it, but the question slipped out: "Dad, do you love me?"

    His father''s eyes narrowed, and Lex''s heart sank.

    It hit Lex at once. What he hadn''t understood before. His father wasn''t just abusive because he didn''t love Lex. He was abusive because he constantly made Lex wonder.

    Lex had condemned his father without even meaning to. He could see it in the judge''s eyes.

    That was the only reason why his father wasn''t answering. At least, Lex hoped that was why. The alternative was . . .

    " . . . Dad? . . . Please?"

    Silence.

    No. It couldn''t be true. It couldn''t.

    He had never thought of love as his right. Maybe it was; maybe it wasn''t; but either way, it wasn''t simply something he wanted¡ªit was something he needed, and he had never known how desperate the need was until now.

    He looked over at Martha. The look on her face was broken. Hurting for him. She loved him. She loved him differently than his mother ever had¡ªhis mother hadn''t ever tried to stop his father.

    Lex had to take the risk. It could cost him everything, but he didn''t have anything to lose. His father didn''t love him.

    He looked right at the judge. "The Kents have never made me ask that question."

    The venom in his father''s eyes pierced him to the core, but he didn''t let himself cry, not yet. He still had a testimony to give. Besides, his father had no sympathy for tears.

    Later, Martha would hold him and comfort him and wipe the tears away.

    And he would never, ever have to wonder if she loved him.

 Chapter 26: Movie Night

    The judge declared Lionel guilty.

    Outside the courthouse, sitting in the car, Martha held Lex in her arms for a long, long time while he cried himself to exhaustion. She had no words of comfort for him¡ªshe couldn''t even imagine the pain. She simply held him tight, pulled him back to wipe away his tears every so often, and whispered, from time to time, "I love you, sweetheart . . . I love you so much . . ."

    She stopped on the way home to buy him an ice cream cone. She knew he wouldn''t be hungry for lunch if she did, but she was far, far past caring about that. His eyes were still a little swollen by the time they reached the house, but his face wasn''t as red. He just looked tired.

    She made him take a nap. He tried to argue, but she wasn''t having it¡ªshe followed him up to his room, gently rubbed his back for a few minutes once he was settled in, and told him he could come downstairs in thirty minutes if he couldn''t sleep. He didn''t come down for three hours.

    That night, Jonathan suggested a movie. Clark climbed on the couch between his parents, and Lex headed over to sit in the rocking chair.

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    Martha took a risk: "Ah, ah."

    Lex stood straight up.

    Martha scooted over to clear a little space between herself and Clark.

    Lex smiled and went to sit between them. He was stiff at first, but began to relax as the night progressed. Clark fell asleep less than a half an hour into the movie, his head resting on his father''s side, his hand lightly gripping Lex''s arm.

    No one moved for awhile after the movie ended. Martha had seen Lex''s eyes close, but as the credits ran, they opened and welled with tears once again.

    His voice was so soft, she thought for a moment she had only imagined it: "He doesn''t love me."

    Jonathan shifted Clark so he was lying across his lap, and he wrapped his arm around Lex''s shoulder. "That''s his loss. Not yours."

    "I don''t deserve¡ª"

    "Stop that." Martha tapped his knee. "Sweetheart, will you let us adopt you?"

    "Martha¡ª"

    "We''ve wanted to since day one."

    "I killed my brother."

    "It was an accident."

    "But . . . what if I hurt . . ." His eyes fell on Clark.

    "Hey," Jonathan said.

    Lex looked up at him.

    Jonathan smiled. "He''s not easy to hurt, you know."

    Lex let his head fall, and Jonathan turned to pull the boy into his arms, so his head rested on his chest, while Martha held him from behind.

    Jonathan held Lex at arm''s length and looked him right in the eyes, and he spoke more firmly than Martha had ever heard: "There is nothing you can do to make us stop loving you."

    The boy nodded and relaxed into his arms again.

 Chapter 27: School

    It wasn''t until Clark brought it up that Lex thought about school.

    "I''m so excited!" Clark said one afternoon while they were playing basketball. "School starts in two weeks!"

    Lex dropped the ball as panic shot through his limbs, but then he let out his breath. The Kents weren''t going to send him to Excelsior. They probably couldn''t afford to send him to any boarding school, even if they''d wanted to. "You''re excited about that?"

    "Yeah! It''s fun. I get to see Pete every day, and Greg, and . . . Lana . . ." His cheeks turned pink.

    Lex chuckled. Clark''s voice always went soft when he said Lana''s name. "Well, I''m glad you like school."

    "You don''t?"

    "No."

    "Why not?"

    "Because it''s boring, and I don''t like homework, and . . . I usually can''t make friends."

    "Why not?"

    "Because other kids don''t like me."

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    Clark''s eyes went wide. "Why don''t they like you? You''re the best."

    "Thanks, Clark." Lex sighed. Strictly speaking, he wasn''t sure how true it was that no one liked him. Sure, there had been that birthday party that no one came to, but later, he''d found the invitations in the trash. His father''s doing, he was sure, though he''d never confronted him about it¡ªjust assumed it was a punishment for something or other. But Lex had definitely never had friends, at least not since the meteor shower. "People don''t like my father. And . . . they think I''m weird."

    "Why do they think you''re weird?"

    Lex let out a short laugh. "Because I''m bald."

    "So?"

    "So . . . that''s not normal for eighth graders."

    "So?"

    Lex groaned. "So people make fun of me."

    Clark gasped. "That''s so mean!"

    "I''m used to it." Lex shrugged.

    "But it''s mean." Clark huffed and crossed his arms. "If anyone makes fun of you, I''m gonna beat them up for you."

    "No, you won''t!" Lex reached out and poked Clark in the ribs¡ªClark''s invulnerability didn''t save him from tickling. Clark shrieked with laughter. "Your mom and dad will kill you if you do that."

    "Okayy." Clark pulled away from the tickling. "But you should stay away from the people who make fun of you. Pete has a brother your age, he might be your friend if he knows you''re my brother."

    Lex was pretty sure Pete''s family was one his father had cheated, so he wasn''t sure about that, but he nodded anyway.

    "And if people are mean to you, you can tell Mom and Dad."

    Lex winced. "It''s not that easy in middle school."

    "Well, you can tell me. I won''t beat them up, but I''ll give you hugs. So you feel better."

    Lex''s eyes stung, and he reached down to hug his little brother. "Thanks, Clark," he said.

 Chapter 28: Car Ride

    The last day of summer was the best day of Clark''s life. Better than Christmas. Better than his birthday.

    First, Dad didn''t make him or Lex do any chores all day. Instead, they spent extra time getting dressed up and ready to go to the courthouse, and their farm hand did extra chores.

    Mom and Dad were smiling more than Clark had ever seen them smile, at least as long as he could remember. Mom said they were this happy the day they adopted Clark, too. Also on the day they got married, but that was before Clark was born.

    Then the judge at the courthouse had told them that Lex was going to be part of their family. Mom and Dad promised to always love him and take care of him. And the judge looked right at Clark and said that Lex was going to be his big brother forever!

    After they took some family photos, Dad took everyone out to dinner, and they got ice cream. Clark wasn''t usually allowed to get the big sundaes, but Mom said he could today, because it was a special occasion.

    It was dark by the time they were driving back to the house.

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    Clark sat in the middle seat instead of the side one, so he could be closer to his brother. He whispered, "What''s going to happen with your other dad?" He knew he wasn''t supposed to talk to Lex about that, but he really wanted to know.

    "I dunno. I might go visit him sometimes. He''s still in jail."

    "Why is he in jail?"

    Lex looked away and didn''t answer for a little while, then he whispered, "Because he hurt me."

    Clark felt like his heart was breaking into pieces. How could someone hurt Lex? "Why?"

    Lex''s eyes got watery. "He didn''t love me."

    That made no sense. "That''s stupid. Why didn''t he love you?"

    "Because I messed up a lot."

    "So? He should still love you." No one should ever hurt Lex. He was the best big brother ever!

    "Thanks, Clark." Lex sniffed and wiped his eyes.

    "Are you scared of your other dad?"

    "Yeah, sometimes."

    Clark frowned. "Are you scared of my dad?"

    "A little, I guess."

    "My dad won''t hurt you."

    "I know he won''t. But sometimes I forget."

    Clark picked up Lex''s arm and snuggled himself under it, wrapping his own arm around Lex''s waist and resting his head on his chest. "No one is going to hurt you ever again. I''ll protect you."

    "I''ll protect you, too."

    "From the bad scientiss?"

    "Yeah." Lex laid his cheek on Clark''s head. "I love you, little brother."

    "I love you, too."

    Lex pulled him in a little tighter.

    "You give the best hugs," Clark whispered, closing his eyes.

    "So do you," Lex said, and that was the last thing Clark heard before he fell asleep.

 Chapter 29: Something Beautiful

    Lex was a Kent.

    Not by name. They''d given him the choice to change his last name if he wanted, and after thinking about it, he decided not to. He figured that if his mother was dead and his father was in prison, and he was the only one to carry on the Luthor name, it was up to him to change what that name meant.

    So his name was still Alexander Luthor. But he was absolutely, and legally, a part of the Kent family.

    Jonathan carried Clark up to his bedroom while Lex helped Martha take out the ingredients for cookies in the kitchen. When Jonathan came back downstairs, he was carrying a small wrapped box. "We got you something, Lex."

    Lex''s heart swelled at the gift. He hadn''t had a birthday or Christmas with them yet; they had never gotten him a present before. He gingerly took the package. "Can I open it?"

    "Of course," Martha said, and he tore through the wrapping paper.

    Inside was a silver key¡ªit looked just like the house key, but newer. Hooked onto the ring was a keychain¡ªit housed a tiny copy of the family photo they''d taken at the courthouse.

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    Lex''s eyes stung for the millionth time that day. "Thank you, sir."

    Jonathan put a gentle hand on his cheek and kissed the top of his head, then looked him right in the eyes. "This is your home."

    "I know."

    "We''re your parents. For life."

    "I know . . ." He winced.

    Martha frowned. "Is there something wrong, sweetheart?"

    "It''s just . . . now that I''m your son, officially, you probably want me to call you . . ." He couldn''t bring himself to say the words.

    "Mom and Dad?" Martha asked. "We should have offered to let you call us that a long time ago."

    He cringed. "I . . . don''t know if I can." Too much pain around the name Mom. Too much fear around Dad.

    Her eyebrows raised, and she gave his shoulder a light squeeze. "That''s okay, Lex. We understand."

    "Is there something you''d rather call us?" Jonathan asked.

    Lex swallowed hard. They''d probably be okay with Ma and Pa or something, but those names just didn''t sound right in his mind. "I . . . I dunno if you''d be okay with it if I kept calling you Martha and Jonathan. Maybe someday I can switch, but, um . . ."

    "Oh, baby." Martha kissed him on the forehead. "We''re okay with whatever''s comfortable for you."

    "Really?"

    "Really," Jonathan said firmly.

    Lex smiled. If his other dad had said something like that, it would have been a trap. But when the Kents said it, Lex believed them.

    Martha''s eyes filled with tears. "We love you so, so much."

    "I love you too." He melted into his mom''s arms, and his dad came over to hug him from behind a moment later.

 Chapter 30: Martha

    Martha didn''t expect raising Lex to be easy, and it wasn''t. The years surfaced traumas and scars she couldn''t have imagined even when she first saw that battered boy at the police station. But the boy he strove to be, and the man he grew into, lit up her heart with pride and joy every day.

    Lex went through phases of rebellion in his teen years, but he remained fiercely protective of Clark even on the days when he showed the least respect to Martha and Jonathan. He struggled his way through middle and high school, facing conflicts with teachers and bullies, but ultimately graduating top of his class and earning a scholarship to Metropolis University.

    Clark was in sixth grade when Lex went off to college. Clark''s rebellious phases began when his brother was gone, but Lex called to both scold and encourage him when things got bad, and over time, Clark matured as well.

    Lex inherited nothing from Lionel¡ªLuthorCorp had long been dissolved¡ªbut he started his own nonprofit, and worked to change their community for the better. The best part was that he based his company out of Smallville and made family dinners on Sundays a priority.

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    And one Sunday, he brought a pretty girl to family dinner. Eighteen months later, Clark''s best man speech made Martha cry.

    And today? Today was a day she''d been waiting for. For years, she hadn''t even known she should be looking forward to this moment, but now she''d been counting the days. Approximately nine months'' worth.

    Lex wore deep bags under his eyes. Martha didn''t blame him¡ªshe knew it had probably been awhile since he had slept. But when he placed the little pink bundle in her arms, and those bright blue-green eyes fluttered open and stared up at her, she knew why he also looked happier than he ever had.

    "I''ll have to call you something else now," he said. "Seeing as she''s named Martha."

    "You''ve always been allowed to call me Mom." Martha had never pressured him about that. After all these years, being called by her first name felt natural.

    "I know," he said. "But for her sake, I think I''m going to be using the name Grandma a lot more often."

    She shot him a look.

    "Fine. Mom it is. And I''ll call Jonathan Dad. It''s only fair."

    Martha nodded, absentminded. She knew what he was saying was important, maybe the most important thing he had said in a long time. But right now, she was having a hard time focusing on anything but her granddaughter''s tiny, soft fingers, which had wrapped around her thumb.

    "Go get some rest," she told her son. "I''ll take care of her."

    "Yes, Mom." Lex leaned down and kissed each Martha on the forehead, then he headed for the stairs.

 Chapter 31: The Baker

    Everything had to be perfect.

    Clark woke up before everyone else did, and he tiptoed down to the kitchen. Lex was 14 today. Clark didn''t have any money to buy a present, and he''d already drawn him so many pictures that the drawer in his bedroom desk was full. Today, he was going to make a cake all by himself.

    He went over to the cabinet where Mom kept her recipe book. He was getting better at reading, so he was pretty sure he could follow the directions. When Mom was cooking, she usually just dumped spices into the pot without measuring them.

    The first part was a list of ingredients, with cup measurements. Clark didn''t really know how to measure ingredients, but he was pretty sure it didn''t matter too much, as long as all the right ingredients were there and he mixed them up enough.

    ? the oven to 350.

    Clark didn''t know what that first word was. It started with a P. He thought about asking Mom for help, but he didn''t want to¡ªhe could do it by himself. He wasn''t sure if he was supposed to use the oven, but it wasn''t like it could burn him. He climbed up onto the counter and started pressing buttons on the oven. It didn''t look like anything was happening, but then the number came on the screen! Perfect.

    ? a 9-inch pan.

    Another word Clark didn''t know, it started with a G. Hopefully that step wasn''t too important. He also didn''t know how big 9 inches was, so he pulled out the pan Mom usually used to fry bacon. That should be big enough.

    Stir together the sugar, flour, cocoa powder, baking soda, baking powder, and salt in a large bowl.

    Clark could read all of those words! He looked through the cabinets and put everything in the middle of the floor, then found a big bowl and a wooden spoon.

    He tasted the sugar first. It was really good! That would make the cake taste good, so he filled up half of the bowl with sugar.

    The flour didn''t taste as good. He wasn''t sure how much to put in. At the top, it said "2 cups," so he went to get his favorite dinosaur cup and filled it up twice.

    The lid on the cocoa powder was stuck. Clark ended up having to use a little bit of his super strength to get it off, but then it flew across the room, and cocoa powder flew everywhere! The floor, some of the cabinets were covered, and all over Clark. Some of it got in the cake, too, though, and that was the important part.

    The baking soda, baking powder, and salt all tasted GROSS! He just put a little bit in. He knew salt was really good on potatoes, so he put a little extra of the salt. Then, he stirred it all up, only spilling a little over the side of the bowl.

    Add the milk, eggs, oil, and ?

    Mom always said the milk jug was heavy¡ªClark didn''t have any problem lifting it, but it was awkward to pour, and he ended up spilling some of it over the side. He made sure to put in lots of milk, since that would make Mom happy¡ªshe was always bugging him to drink his milk.

    The eggs were a much bigger problem. He had no idea how to crack eggs. He experimented with a couple of them on the floor, but the shells just got crushed into a million pieces. He finally decided to just crush the egg in his hand and then try to take out as much of the shell as he could when it was in the cake. He took out the biggest pieces, then hid the other ones under the other ingredients so no one would see them. He checked the list at the top¡ªit said 2 eggs, so he did that twice.

    He was surprised to see oil on the list. The week before, Dad was showing him how he changed the oil in his car. Clark didn''t know the oil was a food ingredient! But actually, that made sense¡ªit was what the car ate. Also gasoline. But this recipe didn''t have any gasoline in it. Clark snuck out to the garage to get the oil, and he poured some of it into the bowl.

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    Finally, that last word. It started with a V. He looked around for awhile for ingredients that started with V, and found a bottle of clear liquid that smelled like the stuff Mom used to dye easter eggs. Maybe that meant it would make the cake look pretty. He poured in a bunch.

    Back to the recipe:

    Mix for two minutes on medium speed.

    Clark could do that. He used the wooden spoon and mixed up the ingredients. He went a little too fast at first and splashed a bunch onto one of the cabinets, but he slowed down after that. They smelled really weird. Mostly like cocoa powder, but also kind of like the garage. But that was just because the cake wasn''t done yet.

    He poured the batter into the pan¡ªnot all of it fit, so he just filled the pan up to the top¡ªthen he put the pan in the oven. He tripped on the bag of flour on the way over, and some of the flour sprayed across the room, but he didn''t spill too much of the batter onto the front of the oven, so it was okay.

    Bake for 30 to 35 minutes.

    Mom had showed Clark how to use the kitchen timer, but he couldn''t remember, so he would just have to take the cake out when it felt like it had been 30 minutes.

    Clark stepped back and looked around the kitchen. Mom always said a messy kitchen was the sign of a happy home. Their home was the happiest!

    <hr>

    Martha had heard Clark clambering out of bed and down the stairs before the crack of dawn. That boy was about as sneaky as an elephant. She wasn''t sure what he was up to, though she figured it had something to do with surprising Lex. She snuggled up next to Jonathan and decided to give it an hour.

    Forty-five minutes later, she was starting to smell something awfully strange. Martha kissed Jonathan on the cheek and went down to the kitchen.

    She was not expecting what she found. There was batter all over one cabinet and the front of the oven, cocoa powder all across another cabinet, spilled milk tracked all over the floor, and a few crushed eggs by the refrigerator. Scattered around the floor were typical baking ingredients¡ªflour, sugar, eggs, milk, and, for some reason, motor oil. And Clark, right in the middle of it in his pajamas, covered in cocoa powder and grinning ear to ear.

    She took a deep breath, counted backwards from ten in her head, and forced her tone to remain pleasant. "Clark? What''s this?"

    "I''m surprising Lex!" He jumped up onto his feet and bounced on his toes. "I made him a cake! Because he''s the best big brother ever and I want to be the best little brother ever!"

    Her heart positively melted.

    "Only . . . I forgot to make a frosting."

    She scooped up her precious boy in her arms¡ªhe was getting too big to be picked up, but she wanted to enjoy every moment while she still could. "You''ve worked really hard this morning. Why don''t you go out and visit with the horses, and I''ll take care of the frosting? Dad will be out pretty soon, and you can start on chores."

    "Okay! But Lex doesn''t have to do any chores today, right? Because it''s his birthday."

    "That''s true. He might come out anyway." Martha doubted it would be very soon, though¡ªtheir teenager would sleep until 1 in the afternoon if he was allowed. She set Clark down and gave him a pat on the back. "Go."

    He scurried out of the house. As soon as he was gone, she set to work cleaning the kitchen and baking a new cake. She took the mess Clark had made out of the oven¡ªshe did the best she could cleaning out her frying pan, but was pretty sure it would never be the same.

    Jonathan came downstairs while the cake was baking. She gave him the short version of what had happened, and he laughed and kissed her before going out to begin work for the day.

    The cake was cooling, and Martha was working on making frosting, when Lex came down into the kitchen, eyes still puffy from sleep.

    "Morning, sweetheart."

    "Morning, Martha."

    "Happy birthday."

    "Thanks." He gave a slight smile, and she went over to hug him. He didn''t like it much when she tried to hug him around his friends, but at home, he gripped onto her tightly, almost like he was afraid she was going to disappear.

    "Clark tried to make you a cake this morning."

    Lex''s eyes widened. "Oh no. How did that go?"

    "Had to throw it away. I made that one." She nodded over to her own cake. "But I trust you can keep my secret? He really wanted to be the one to surprise you."

    Lex nodded. "Yes, ma''am."

    "Good." She gestured toward to door. "Go out and see your little brother."

    "No chores, though?"

    "No chores for you today."

    He grinned, gave her a quick kiss on the cheek, and darted out of the door.

    <hr>

    With the frosting, the cake looked even better than Clark had imagined, and it tasted amazing. Mom and Dad were so proud of him, and Lex was so happy. He said it was the best birthday he''d ever had. That made Clark''s eyes feel all prickly.

    Clark had no idea he was such a good baker. He couldn''t wait to surprise his mom on Mother''s Day!

 Chapter 32: Trust

    1

    About a month after Lex''s adoption was finalized, Martha started giving him a little more responsibility around the house. They''d relieved him of some of his farm chores so he could settle into eighth grade, since the chores tired him out and would have made it difficult for him to get his homework done, but she still wanted him to feel like he was able to contribute to the household.

    So she was washing dishes, and Lex was drying them and putting them away. She was caught up in what she was doing and didn''t notice that Lex was a bit more tired than usual until there was a loud crash behind her.

    Martha turned around. Glass shards covered the floor. Lex stood in shock, hand out in front of him as though he were still holding the glass he''d dropped.

    "Oh, what happened?" She took a couple of steps toward him.

    He cringed, holding his hands out in front of his face, eyes squeezed shut.

    She stopped in her tracks. "Lex, I''m not gonna hurt you. It was an accident." She didn''t like the way that had come out¡ªit seemed to imply she might hurt him if he''d done it on purpose. "I''m not gonna hurt you. Ever."

    Slowly, he lowered his hands and straightened up, but his cheeks reddened.

    She didn''t say anything else about it. He was embarrassed enough. Instead, she simply taught him how to clean up the shards of broken glass safely, and they continued putting away the dishes together. He was stiff the whole time, his face bright red.

    When they''d finished with all of the dishes, she reached toward him with open arms. He flinched just slightly, but she pulled him into a soft embrace and hugged him for as long as he let her.

    <hr noshade="noshade" size="1">

    2

    "Hey, sweetie, we need to talk."

    Martha watched the blood drain away from Lex''s face as she said the words. He had come home from school in such a good mood, Martha was hesitant to ruin it. But they''d warned him.

    She stood in the doorway of his bedroom, and he sat in his desk chair, frozen.

    "W-what''s wrong?" he asked.

    "It''s not a big thing. It''s just, this morning, you forgot to put the milk away again."

    His eyes widened. "I''m so sorry, Martha."

    "I know, but this is the third time this week. You remember what I said last time."

    He pulled his knees into his chest and gripped at his head with tense fingers. "I''m sorry," he muttered under his breath. "Please . . . I''ll never forget again. I won''t."

    Martha frowned. She''d told him he was going to be in trouble if he kept leaving the milk out, but she didn''t give him any specifics. Now, though, she wondered if she had been wrong to leave so much to his imagination. She sighed¡ªeven after six months in their home, Lex didn''t trust his new parents not to abuse him.

    Martha made a mental note to check in with Lex''s therapist about how to handle these types of situations. Today, though, she couldn''t imagine assigning even the smallest punishment to him while he was in this state.

    "Okay, Lex, breathe." She knelt in front of him and reached up to squeeze his shoulder. "It''s okay. Just try to remember next time, okay?"

    He nodded, and his breathing slowed.

    <hr noshade="noshade" size="1">

    3

    Martha couldn''t take any more of her boys arguing. She was trying to finish the accounting for the farm at the kitchen table. Lex sat reading a book across from her, and Clark had pestered Lex to play with him about a thousand times.

    "Clark," Martha said, "go find something to do by yourself for a little while. Lex, finish the chapter you''re on, then go play with your brother."

    Lex was clearly immersed in his book. He didn''t even look up. "I don''t want to play with him. I''m tired of pretending to play basketball with someone who could win every time if he actually tried, and I''m sick of pretending to lose at checkers to someone who can''t figure out which way the pieces go."

    Clark''s lower lip trembled, and he ran out of the room, covering his eyes with his forearm as he went, shoulders hitching. Lex still didn''t look up from his book; Martha wondered if he had any idea how much he had hurt his little brother. Martha knew he''d been struggling with bullies at the high school, and he was only acting out because of that, but he also needed to know that what he was doing was unacceptable. Jonathan would probably be able to get through to him better than she would. Besides, she needed to go comfort her younger son.

    Martha stood from her chair, stalked over to Lex, and took the book from his hands.

    "Hey, I''ll lose my place¡ª"

    She slammed the book down on the table. "You march up to your bedroom right now, Alexander Luthor, and wait for Jonathan to come up and deal with you." It might be a long wait¡ªJonathan wasn''t due to come back in for lunch for another hour¡ªbut that served him right for the way he''d spoken to his little brother.

    His response was immediate. His eyebrows shot up, and he fell to his knees in front of her, gripping onto the front of her shirt with one hand.

    "No, no, no, I''m sorry, Martha, I''m sorry, don''t make me!" Tears filled his eyes. "Please. I''ll be good, I promise, I''ll do whatever you want. Please!"

    She swallowed hard and gently pried Lex''s hand away from her shirt, taking his trembling hand in hers. She wanted to ask him what he thought Jonathan was going to do, but she already had some ideas, based on his past. The problem was, she really didn''t want to back down, and his therapist had said it wouldn''t necessarily be good for him if she did. Lex needed to learn that the worst thing Jonathan was going to do to him was give him a lecture and maybe some extra chores. He also needed to learn that he couldn''t treat Clark like that and expect nothing to happen.

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    Part of her worried that he was coming to trust them even less than he had when he''d arrived. She had never seen him so panicked over the promise of discipline, though she''d never sent him up to wait for Jonathan, either. Then again, maybe the begging was a sign of progress. She doubted he would have begged Lionel; he would have known it was useless.

    "He''s not going to hurt you." Martha forced herself to keep her voice firm. "He''s just going to talk to you. Now go up to your room."

    Lex trudged away toward the stairs, wiping at his eyes. Martha sighed and followed behind a minute later, heading into Clark''s room first. She picked up the sobbing boy in her arms and rocked him for a moment, murmuring assurances that Lex didn''t mean what he said, before taking him with her to go talk to Jonathan. Lex couldn''t wait an hour for Jonathan to come into the house. The boy needed to be disciplined, but if they made him wait, he was going to hyperventilate until he passed out.

    As Martha walked, she combed her fingers through Clark''s hair, kissed his forehead, and cursed Lionel under her breath.

    <hr noshade="noshade" size="1">

    4

    Despite his run-ins with school bullies, Lex was doing quite well at Smallville High. His teachers had mostly good things to say about him, at least academically¡ªsome were more ruffled by the boy''s tendency to call them out on mistakes than others were, but Martha figured that they could work on tact. As long as he wasn''t being blatantly disrespectful, she wasn''t too worried.

    It surprised her when he hid his report card at the end of the first semester.

    Martha knew he''d done it because she knew exactly when report cards were supposed to come out, and for the week leading up to that day, Lex was unexpectedly helpful about bringing in the mail for her.

    She didn''t mince words with him. She called him down to the living room and asked point blank, "Where''s your report card?"

    He gave her a look of obviously-fake confusion. He wasn''t as good at lying as he thought he was. "How would I know?"

    She took his chin in her hand. "Don''t play games with me, Alexander Luthor."

    He cringed. "I didn''t want you to get mad at me."

    "Then hiding your report card was a very bad decision. Go get it."

    He paused only a moment before getting up and disappearing up the stairs. He came back and held it out to her. She gestured for him to sit beside him on the couch, and she opened the envelope.

    All A''s, except for one B in history.

    Martha looked up at Lex, bewildered. "This is a good report card. Why would you think we''d be upset?"

    "My history grade."

    She frowned down at the singular B. She wouldn''t have thought much of it, but history was usually his favorite subject. "Well, that is unusual for you. What do you think happened?"

    "I failed an essay because I . . . didn''t exactly follow the prompt like he wanted me to. It pushed my grade down."

    "Why didn''t you follow the directions?"

    "Because the prompt was wrong."

    She nodded slowly. If the failed essay had pushed him down to a D or F, she would have asked him to talk to his teacher about it, and she might have offered to accompany him for the conversation. As it was, they could talk about that later. She was more concerned about the fact that he still hadn''t figured out they weren''t going to abuse him. "This is a good report, sweetie. I''m proud of you."

    Lex looked away, but he smiled, ever so slightly. "So, I''m not in trouble?"

    "Not for your grades. We''re going to take you out for ice cream." She kissed the top of his head. "But not this weekend. You''re grounded for hiding the report." That was the standard sentence for lying in their household.

    Lex lowered his head.

    <hr noshade="noshade" size="1">

    5

    Martha had heard horror stories from her friends who were raising teenagers. She was never quite sure what they were talking about. At fifteen, Lex was amazing. He rarely complained about doing his chores, he helped Clark with his homework, and he was usually very sweet and respectful.

    He did miss his curfew once, which had Martha tearing her hair out with worry. After talking it over and debating whether to go easy on him because it was his first infraction, Martha and Jonathan decided to make a statement instead. They decided to ground him and give him extra chores for two whole weeks. They figured it might be kinder to deal with his misbehavior exactly once, than have to punish him repeatedly.

    When Lex came home, they talked to him about how worried they''d been and how much they loved him until tears filled his eyes. They explained that he was forgiven, but that there were still consequences for his actions, and they gave him his sentence.

    Lex looked hurt, and he spent some time alone in the barn the next day, after which he returned to the house with swollen eyes and red cheeks. Other than that, though, he didn''t complain about the grounding. He was fairly quiet for the duration of the two weeks, but he didn''t resist the extra chores, and he didn''t ask for an early reprieve, even when the grounding ran through a party he''d been looking forward to. When his grounding ended, Martha and Jonathan had one last talk with Lex before releasing him, and they each gave him a long hug and reminded him, again, that he was forgiven.

    Lex didn''t smile, and he stiffened instead of hugging back. A couple of days later, Martha found him out in the barn. He was still doing all of the extra chores they''d assigned to him while he was grounded, and he still wasn''t spending any time with his friends after school.

    "Lex." She came and put a hand on his shoulder. "You don''t need to do this."

    "I was bad," he muttered, and started working even harder.

    "You made a mistake, but you''ve already paid for it. It''s over, sweetie. We told you, we forgive you. Do you not believe us?"

    He shrugged and continued working.

    <hr noshade="noshade" size="1">

    +1

    Martha never thought she''d be the kind of mom who would get upset with her son over a grade that was less than an A, but Lex quickly proved what he was capable of. Any more than one or two B''s meant he was slacking off in class, not doing his homework, or talking back to his teachers.

    During his sophomore year, his first quarter report card came in with two A''s, four B''s, and one C.

    She didn''t scold him about his grades right away¡ªthey''d have that conversation later. The party he wanted to go to was more important to discuss. Martha knew the party host''s parents¡ªthey were out of town this weekend. Nothing good was going to happen if he went.

    "You''re not going to that party," she told him.

    "Yes, I am. I already told my friends I would."

    "Well, you didn''t ask me first. Besides, you have homework to do."

    "It''s Friday night! I can do it tomorrow."

    "No, you won''t. You have chores, and riding practice, and your little brother is going to want to play with you."

    "Sunday, then."

    "You''re not putting your homework off until the last minute to go to a party. Your grades are slipping."

    "They''re almost all A''s and B''s!"

    "And can you honestly tell me you''ve been doing the absolute best you can in school?"

    Lex rolled his eyes.

    She crossed her arms. "Don''t you roll your eyes at me, young man. I expect more from you, Alexander, or you can spend every Friday evening at home until your grades pick up."

    Lex looked away, and spat out a foul word under his breath, clearly directed at her.

    Martha''s jaw dropped.

    She knew she should be angry. Her own mother would have washed out her mouth with soap for that kind of language, and Jonathan''s would have slapped him across the mouth.

    But Martha felt no anger. Her throat choked up, and she had to fight to contain her elation. This was far from the first time Lex had mouthed off to her, but it was the first time he''d held onto his rebellion even after she''d threatened him, and it was definitely the first time he''d sworn at her. Any other mother would be livid with his behavior, but she hadn''t been this happy in a long time.

    Her son trusted her. Finally, he felt safe. Finally, she could deal with this the way she needed to without worrying about whether he''d believe she loved him when it was over.

    She swallowed her euphoria, raised her eyebrows, and breathed to give him a tongue-lashing he''d never forget.

 Chapter 33: The Lawyer

    Lex was used to lawyers and reporters by the time his eighteenth birthday rolled around.

    Reporters had always flocked around him at Excelsior, especially when his mother died. Lawyers approached him throughout the appeals on Lionel''s prison sentence, and the Kents helped Lex to navigate each situation. And when Lionel killed himself in prison, lawyers and reporters called in daily and made their way to the farm.

    Jonathan kicked people out of the house right and left, sometimes threatening violence, and he became as skilled at identifying them as Lex was. On the rare occasion anyone managed to get through their defenses, Martha always gave Lex a long hug after their conversations¡ªit wasn''t exactly traumatic for him, but he hated talking to them.

    Lex probably should have expected a lawyer to show up on his eighteenth birthday, but it had been a long time, and it was the furthest thing from his mind.

    "I''m looking for an Alexander Luthor?" the lawyer said when Lex answered the door. He was asking a stupid question¡ªLex was all too easily identifiable.

    "Who are you?" Lex asked. Also a stupid question. The man reeked of his profession. The cologne, the suit, the sneer, even the voice.

    Lex heard heavy footsteps on the staircase behind him, then Jonathan''s voice: "What do you want?"

    "A private meeting with young Mr. Luthor. It should take no more than a few minutes."

    "He''s a minor, and we''re his legal parents. We have the right to be there for any meeting you call with him."

    "Actually, you don''t. Mr. Luthor is eighteen, as of today."

    "Well, since he''s an adult, he has the right to insist¡ª"

    "Jonathan, it''s okay," Lex said. "Could you give us a minute?"

    Jonathan scowled. "You call for me the minute you need me," he said, and he headed back up the stairs.

    Lex nodded for the lawyer to enter, and he closed the door behind him and took him into the living room. They sat down on the couch.

    "I apologize that this is so sudden. Your father''s instructions were very clear, he¡ª"

    "If we''re going to have this conversation, I want to make one thing very clear. Lionel Luthor is not my father. Jonathan Kent is."

    The lawyer frowned. "I find it curious that you never changed your name."

    Lex didn''t feel the need to explain his personal life choices to a stranger. "What''s this about?"

    "Your inheritance."

    "I have no inheritance. All accounts with Lionel''s name on them were dissolved."

    "Almost all. This trust fund had your name." The lawyer swung his briefcase onto his lap and clicked it open, then he took out an envelope and handed it to Lex. "The account information, as well as the current balance."

    Lex''s jaw pulsed before he took the envelope and opened it with his fingers. The balance made him lose his breath for a moment.

    Over thirty million.

    Lex put the paper back into the envelope and held it out to the lawyer. "Not interested."

    The lawyer didn''t even look down at the paper. "That''s not my problem."

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    "I don''t want anything that belonged to Lionel Luthor."

    "Then ignore it. Give it away. I don''t care. I''m just a messenger." The lawyer snapped his briefcase shut and left the house.

    Lex swallowed. It was more than not wanting anything of his biological father''s. He didn''t like what wealth did to people, or to their relationships. Jonathan and Martha''s view of him would change if he suddenly had eight digits in the bank account, as would Clark''s¡ªthey wouldn''t be able to help it. Lex could never hope for another real friendship. He couldn''t get married; he could never trust a woman to be truly uninterested in his money.

    Jonathan came down the stairs as soon as the door closed. He turned to Lex, who sat on the couch, envelope in his hand. "What was that about?"

    "Just an obligatory visit to let me know what''s left of Lionel''s estate."

    "Ah. Anything interesting?"

    Despite years of having honesty drilled into him, Lex shook his head. "No, not really."

    <hr noshade="noshade" size="1">

    Lex had every intention of forgetting about the money, until his acceptance letter came in from Metropolis University. He had earned a full merit scholarship, which seemed wildly unfair to the next-highest-achieving student who didn''t make the cut.

    Lex knew Jonathan had called a financial advisor he trusted a couple of times when the farm was struggling. When the Kents were out, Lex found the phone number and set up a confidential meeting.

    They met in a little office building at the edge of Smallville. Lex told him about the account, and then he cut right to the chase: "Is it possible to keep this a secret?"

    "In theory, yes," the advisor told him. "But you''re going to have a very difficult time."

    "How do I prevent people from finding out?"

    "You have to live like you don''t have the money."

    It sounded easy enough.

    <hr noshade="noshade" size="1">

    Lex met with a few members of the financial aid committee at the university in confidence to discuss what should be done with his scholarship funds. They told him the award wasn''t need-based, and he could keep it if he wanted, but he declined. Under the circumstances, they agreed to apply Lex''s scholarship funds to the runner up, but still officially consider Lex a merit scholarship winner in their documentation. Lex just needed to know that the programs at graduation would mention the scholarship; that was the only way to keep his family out of the dramas and dangers of his wealth.

    Meanwhile, the Kents'' financial advisor set Lex up with some low-stakes, low-gain investments that would maintain the value of the account. The advisor told him that if he spent less than a million a year, the account would never lose much of its value, but admonishing him that he''d be hard pressed to hide it if he spent more than a hundred thousand a year.

    That was fine with Lex, but over the years, he found ways to spend the money in ways that weren''t obvious. In college, he bought a car that looked nice to him and was reliable, but was made by an overseas company that people wouldn''t easily associate with the car''s six-digit price tag. After graduation, Lex started a non-profit medical research company, and claimed a few million in anonymous startup donations. Most people had no idea how much it costed to start up that kind of company, or how difficult it was to secure initial donations, so people didn''t bat an eyelash. And when Lex bought an engagement ring for Anastasia¡ªwho was still in the dark about how he could afford everything he did¡ªhe went for a medium-sized diamond, but made sure it was the highest-quality stone money could buy.

    Aside from that, Lex made a habit of treating friends to meals, though he was respectful if they declined and grateful if they insisted on treating him instead. He enjoyed giving gifts to friends and family, and he frequently found himself shrugging and telling his parents "I got a good deal" when they asked how he had managed to afford a particular gift. He was also generous with his employees, though he found that in the long run, this usually earned him more money than it lost him.

    He dressed simply, as did his family, and gave his kids no more in Christmas or birthday presents than their grandparents did. The Luthors lived in a house the size of the Kents'' home, and their family took no more lavish vacations than the average family in the area.

    But sometimes, one of the Kents''s friends would unexpectedly find their medical bills cancelled. And occasionally, a student at Smallville High who had been kind to Clark would discover they''d won a scholarship they didn''t remember applying for¡ªit happened to Clark himself, too. And once in awhile, a struggling family who was doing generous work in the community would receive a message that their mortgage had been paid in full. Most of them never found out what had happened.

    And once every year or two, Lex would leave his kids at the Kent farm, whisk his wife away to a private island, and pamper her with delicacies, fine wines, expensive jewelry and other gifts, spa treatments, and the softest sands and clearest skies in the world. Anastasia always told him that he didn''t have to spoil her, that she would enjoy the time with him just as much regardless of where they were, but Lex felt perfectly justified in every dollar he spent those weekends. She was worth every penny.

 Chapter 34: Uncle Clark

    Clark was up two hours earlier than usual to make sure he got all of his chores done. He didn''t want to have to think about it while his niece was around. This was far from the first time Clark had babysat his niece¡ªwho everyone called by her middle name, Nicole, since having two Marthas around quickly proved to be more confusing than it was worth¡ªbut it was the first time he''d have her for an entire weekend. It was the first getaway Lex and Anastasia had had since Nicole was born, more than three years ago.

    Of course, Nicole was staying at Clark''s parents'' house, but his parents weren''t as able to keep with a three-year-old as they were when Clark was a toddler. So when Nicole came to stay with them, Clark took on most of the responsibility in entertaining and caring for the little one. He was perfectly fine with that.

    While Anastasia was pregnant, Clark had had a talk with Lex about when would be the right time to tell Nicole about his powers. Lex said he could tell her whenever he wanted to.

    Clark was astonished by this. "Won''t she tell people?"

    Lex just shrugged. "Probably. She''ll tell her friends at daycare that her uncle can lift a tractor, and another little girl will claim her dad can lift a house, and another will say her grandpa can lift the world. Her teachers will love it. By the time she''s old enough to be taken seriously, she''ll be old enough to keep a secret."

    Clark had never gotten to show off his abilities to a child before. To his surprise, though, Nicole wasn''t really impressed with his strength or speed on their own; he had to use them to entertain her if he wanted to capture her attention.

    Clark was just finishing the last of his chores when Lex''s car pulled up. Lex opened the door to the backseat to get Nicole out of her carseat, while Anastasia went straight over to Clark. She gave him a bright smile and a quick hug.

    "Hey Anna," he said.

    "Hey Clark. Thanks so much for doing this."

    Clark grinned first at her, then down at his niece, who Lex was letting down onto the ground. She wore her overalls with the little purple flowers over a green-striped shirt, and a worn straw hat sat lopsided over messy blond curls.

    Nicole ran directly over to Clark, bouncing on her toes and lifting her arms, blue-green eyes wide. "Uncle Cark! Make me fy!"

    Clark picked up the little girl and turned her sideways, jogging zigzags and making plane noises while she put her arms out in front of her and shrieked with laughter. When her squeals turned into pants, he brought her back to her parents and set her down.

    Anastasia knelt down in front of Nicole. "You''re going to be a good girl and do everything Uncle and Nana and Papa tell you to do, right?"

    "I know, Mommy."

    Lex walked with Clark a couple of steps away from them. "You have all of our numbers," he said. "If anything happens¡ª"

    "I''ll call you."

    Lex nodded. "She''s still taking naps after lunch. She doesn''t wet the bed anymore."

    "I know."

    "Her bedtime is seven-thirty, but we let her listen to music until eight. Be extra careful if you take her near the horses, she''ll pull at their tails. Make sure she eats her veggies, she will fight you on it. You have to brush and floss for her."

    "Got it."

    "Oh, and she hates her sandwiches cut into squares, you have to make¡ª"

    "Triangles. Lex, I know Nicole pretty well."

    Lex frowned and glanced over at his daughter. "You know, I don''t know what I was thinking, I''m not going to leave her for the whole weekend. I''ll come back tomorrow¡ª"

    "Lex." Clark put a hand on his arm. "We''re going to be fine. Enjoy the time with Anna. You''ve earned a break."

    Lex winced, then looked back up at Clark and nodded. He knelt down and beckoned Nicole over. She ran into his arms.

    "Bye Daddy!"

    He held onto her tightly, then let her go, brushing a lock of her hair behind her ear and kissing her cheek. "I love you, Nikki."

    "Love you too Daddy! Byye!"

    Clark picked up Nicole, and Lex walked Anastasia back to their car.

    Nicole turned toward Clark. "Make me fy! Again!"

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    Clark regularly wondered how Lex and Anastasia survived without superhuman endurance. Even Clark himself was almost getting tired, though it was more of a mental fatigue.

    After Nicole had demanded that Clark make her fly for almost a half an hour, she''d wanted to play the box game. She''d search for items around the house and put them into a cardboard box, then make Clark use his X-Ray vision to guess what was inside. Sometimes, he got the answer wrong on purpose just to make her giggle, but after over thirty rounds of the game, he was running out of ideas for wrong guesses.

    Then she wanted him to juggle furniture. He was careful, but he still made sure his parents didn''t see him do it. Just because Clark was twenty-two and had graduated from college didn''t mean his dad would hesitate to give him a serious lecture.

    His mom sat everyone down for dinner. Both of Clark''s parents coddled their only granddaughter, giving her as much extra rice and ketchup as she wanted, and it was down to Clark to try to force her to eat her peas. He wouldn''t have bothered with it, but he knew Lex would ask, so he promised her ice cream after dinner if she ate everything. That didn''t always work, but it did today.

    After dinner, he rummaged around the pantry for cones and the freezer for ice cream. They had a half a tub of chocolate. He made sure to fill the cone before putting a small scoop over the top, then he showed it to her. "Does that look good?"

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    "Big ice ceam! Pese?"

    He raised an eyebrow. "I dunno."

    "Pity pese?" She clasped her tiny hands.

    "That''s already a lot of ice cream for someone who''s only three."

    She pouted. "Tree an a hass."

    "Ah, well, I stand corrected." He couldn''t resist that look. He scooped a little more ice cream onto the cone and handed it down to her.

    "Yay!" She sat down on the floor of the kitchen and licked happily.

    Clark made himself an ice cream cone as well, being careful not to give himself any more than he''d given her¡ªhe learned that one the hard way last time. If he wanted more, he would have to wait until after she fell asleep. He probably would¡ªhe had earned it.

    He was worried that the sugar would keep her from falling asleep, but she only got through half of the scoop on top before her eyelids fell to half mast and she dropped the remainder of the ice cream cone onto the floor.

    Clark let his mom take care of changing Nicole into her pajamas while he cleaned up the ice cream, but he brushed her teeth for her, and he flossed her as well. She hated flossing. She stalled by continuing to brush her teeth with water, and she tried to talk him out of it with big, watery eyes, but Clark held firm.

    He sat beside her in what used to be Lex''s bed and read her a bedtime story. When he finished the story, he kissed her on the forehead and turned to stand. "Now it''s time to go to sleep. I''ll turn on your music and¡ª"

    "Noo, nutter tory." She gripped onto his arm.

    "No, your dad said 7:30."

    "Pity pese Uncle Cark?" She batted her eyelashes.

    Clark sighed. The girl knew what she wanted and knew how to get it. She definitely took after her dad. "One more."

    One more story turned into three more stories, one cup of water turned into two, and a trip to the bathroom turned into a last kiss and cuddle from Nana and Papa, who pulled her away to the couch to read yet another story, but Nicole finally let Clark tuck her under the covers at 7:55. Clark didn''t bother with setting a timer for himself to come back up and turn off the music; she fell asleep almost instantly once she actually settled down.

    He plunked down on the couch beside his dad, letting his breath out. "Was I ever that exhausting?"

    His dad chuckled. "Clark, you think that''s bad, try dealing with a child with superpowers."

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    The next morning, Clark tried to wake up before Nicole to get through the chores before she arrived, but she was already awake and toddling around in the living room. He was lucky, though¡ªshe hadn''t gotten into anything other than the cereal, and he managed to pluck the box from her hands just as she was about to pour it onto the floor.

    "Uncle Cark! Aw by myseff!"

    "I know, but I''m gonna help you pour your cereal."

    "No, look! Aw by myseff!"

    He took another look at her, and realized she''d gotten changed out of her pajamas. Her shirt was backwards and her shorts were inside out. He decided against bothering with that. "Oh, good work!"

    "I''m big."

    "Yes you are." Clark scooped her up into his arms and tickled her until she was screaming and laughing, then put her down at a chair at the table and poured some cereal and milk for both of them.

    After they finished eating, he took her out to play outside. She had a stuffed ball that she liked to use to play catch, but today she wanted to race. That was easier for Clark than a lot of activities¡ªhe just had to run slow enough to let her win.

    "Go fast, Uncle Cark," she said.

    He shrugged and decided it wouldn''t hurt to show off a little. He ran to the edge of the field and back.

    He was gone for less than three seconds, but apparently she''d tried to follow him, and she''d tripped. Her lower lip trembled, and she hugged her knee to her chest.

    "Oh no." He crouched down in front of her and peeked at her knee¡ªit was skinned and starting to bleed. Lex was going to kill him.

    "Ow," she whispered, her eyes filling with tears, and then she started yelling, "Oww!"

    "Okay, okay." Clark super-sped into the house and came back with a first aid kit. "Let me see it."

    "Don''t touch it!"

    "I have to clean it so I can give you a band-aid."

    "Noo!"

    "This will be really quick, Nicole, I promise. Then I''ll make you fly as long as you want."

    "W-want M-mommy an Daddy-y-y," she sobbed.

    Clark was worse than dead. He gently cleaned the scrape with an antiseptic wipe¡ªshe never stopped crying¡ªand then put a band-aid over it. "Is that better?"

    "I want Mommy an Daddyyyy."

    Clark swallowed hard. "I know." He picked her up into his arms and held her tightly, careful to touch her knee as little as possible. He rocked her gently and even hummed a little¡ªhe''d seen Lex do that when she was a baby¡ªuntil her crying calmed.

    He reached over to the first aid kit and found a pack of tissues, which he used to help her clean her face and blow her nose, then he let her down onto the ground. She whimpered and toddled away, limping a little. "Get Mommy an Daddy?"

    Clark had to distract her. "They''ll be home before you know it. Wanna go see your daddy''s horse?"

    Nicole nodded, sniffling. "Kay."

    He reached down his hand, and she clung onto two fingers as he walked her into the barn.

    "Onnist!" Nicole let go of Clark''s fingers and ran toward the horse. She reached up to pet Onyx''s nose, and Onyx nuzzled her little hand while she giggled. Nicole looked up at Clark. "Sugar?"

    Clark shook his head¡ªhe hadn''t picked up any sugar cubes from the kitchen, and he wasn''t leaving her alone again, no matter how quick he might be. "Not today."

    She stuck out her lower lip at the horse, patting her nose. "Sad Onnist. No sugar for Onnist. Sooo hungry."

    Clark resisted the urge to roll his eyes. Manipulative little Luthor. He glanced around the barn and found a few apples. "Here," he said, handing one down to her. "Hold this up, keep your hand very flat."

    She grinned and took the apple, laughing as Onyx licked it up from her hand. "Aw better."

    They spent the rest of the afternoon visiting with the different animals. Clark was thankful she didn''t try to press his hand to give treats to all of them, since some of their diets were more strict than others. She begged to ride Onyx, but Clark didn''t budge on that one. He knew he could keep her safe, but he also knew Lex would want to be there for his daughter''s first horseback ride.

    It was a long negotiation to get her to eat her carrot sticks at lunchtime, and she stalled even longer on her nap than she had for bedtime the night before, but she didn''t complain about missing her parents anymore, which Clark took as a win. He managed to get a short break in while she was sleeping, and his parents took over entertaining her for a few hours in the early afternoon so he could rest. He wasn''t physically tired, but his powers didn''t help much with the mental exhaustion.

    They played games throughout the later afternoon. Nicole somehow managed to beat Clark at Go Fish so many times, he was almost tempted to use his X-Ray vision to salvage some of his pride.

    Clark was luckier that evening. He didn''t end up having to fight Nicole to go to sleep. He brushed and flossed her teeth and let her change into pajamas before putting on a kids'' movie for her. She snuggled on his lap, and he gently stroked her hair¡ªsomething else he''d seen Lex do¡ªuntil she leaned back on his chest and fell asleep.

    Clark, too, was asleep before the movie ended.

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    The next day, Lex and Anastasia arrived back at the farm two hours ahead of schedule. They both completely ignored Clark and his parents and went straight to Nicole, but no one was offended. Anastasia spun her daughter in the air before hugging her tightly, grinning ear to ear. Lex beamed at Nicole when she toddled over to him, but when he held her, his smile melted into a look of protective ferocity.

    Anastasia went to get her into the carseat while Lex talked to Clark.

    "No problems?"

    "She''s a master negotiator when it comes to bedtime¡ª"

    "That''s my girl."

    "¡ªbut she''s a good kid, Lex. You''re doing a good job with her."

    Lex nodded. "Brushed and flossed?"

    "Yes."

    "She ate everything you asked her to?"

    "Yeah."

    "No other issues? No reason you should have called us?"

    "Everything was fine, Lex."

    Lex nodded, glanced at the car, then looked back at Clark with a deadly glare. "Then why is she wearing a band-aid?"

 Chapter 35: Friendly Advice

    Jonathan never wanted to call the number on the business card that Lionel Luthor gave to him, but Martha was insistent on making Clark''s adoption legal, and Jonathan had no idea how to deal with the many bureaucratic obstacles to making an alien boy he''d found in a cornfield his legal son.

    He didn''t expect the number to be Luthor''s personal line, or for the billionaire to insist on a personal meeting at his office in Metropolis. Jonathan had to dust off his suit¡ªhe almost never wore it, since it was so rare that he could afford to take Martha out anywhere nice, even when he could find the time¡ªand he showered twice, since Martha said the first time hadn''t been enough to get the smell of the farm out of his hair and the dirt from under his fingernails.

    A helicopter landed outside the house to pick him up, and he procrastinated by spending a little too long kissing Martha good bye. He bid good bye to the little guy with a pat to the head, which was the most he''d done so far. He knew if the boy was going to be his son, he''d need to learn to be comfortable doing more than that, but it hadn''t been long, and he wasn''t there yet.

    Luthor was waiting for him in a penthouse office, wearing a suit that clearly cost ten times what Jonathan''s did. "Jonathan Kent. Good to see you." He held out a hand to shake.

    "Mr. Luthor. Thanks for having me." Jonathan smiled and shook his hand. Maybe the Luthors'' reputation was exaggerated.

    "Please, call me Lionel."

    "Alright. Lionel. How''s your son doing?"

    "Recovering quickly, thanks to you. How''s it going with the little man?"

    "Oh, just the usual challenges. Bed wetting, nightmares, some crying." Jonathan''s eyelids still felt heavy from the night before. "I''ll be honest, it''s been pretty exhausting for both of us, but we''re getting through."

    "Well, do you slap him?"

    Jonathan blinked. "For wetting the bed? Of course not, he can''t control it."

    "No, no. For crying. You''ve ordered him to stop, haven''t you?"

    An icy chill passed over Jonathan''s limbs, and he didn''t know what protest to make first. "He¡ªhe''s two," was what came out.

    "Exactly. It''s never too early for a son to learn to obey his father instantly and without question, or suffer the consequences."

    "Y-you''d slap a two-year-old for crying?"

    "Well, let''s just say you''ll never catch my son sniveling in public. Two might be a little young for a belt, but he''s still plenty sturdy enough to feel the strength of his father''s hand."

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    Jonathan clenched his teeth. He could not lose his temper during this meeting. "Strong hand. Duly noted," he forced himself to say.

    "I suppose it''s not too much of a problem when he''s alone at home, but it''s always best to stay ten steps ahead and teach him that he''s never to be caught. Your son''s behavior reflects on you, you know, even if he''s not, ah . . ."

    "Not what?"

    Lionel sniffed. "Not blood."

    Jonathan could feel a vein in his neck rising.

    Lionel went on as though he didn''t notice Jonathan''s anger. "This is all very sudden for you, isn''t it? I trust you have what you need to raise him?"

    "Yes, we''re fine." The last thing Jonathan wanted was to be any more indebted to Lionel Luthor than he already would be after this favor. "My parents packed away a bunch of my old clothes and toys."

    "Ah, now, that''s something to be careful about."

    "Hand-me-downs?"

    "Toys. There''s very little time for frivolities in child rearing. A young man must learn to strategize. Is your home library equipped to the task? I may have some extra copies of Sun Tzu''s works, if it would be helpful."

    "Sun Tzu?"

    "I know what you''re thinking. But trust me when I say that even a farmer can raise his son to be a leader, as long as the boy is never allowed to be weak. The important thing is that you yourself provide a strong presence for your son."

    Jonathan swallowed¡ªhe might still be able to salvage this conversation. "Yes, of course, I intend to be very present in his life."

    "You can''t let his mother coddle him. Women tend to have a softening effect on their boys, but your want your son to be strong, yes? You don''t want him to grow up with the same weaknesses you and your wife have, or he''ll be an embarrassment to your family."

    "I¡ªI beg your pardon?"

    "Teach him history, and be sure he knows that you expect him to be great. Of course, it doesn''t hurt if he grows up with the impression of your perpetual disappointment, so he always has something to strive for."

    Jonathan cleared his throat and straightened up. "Frankly, Mr. Luthor, I''d rather my son grow up knowing that I love him no matter what."

    Lionel raised his eyebrows, looking almost amused. "Ah well. Different men, different methods. Perhaps our sons will meet again someday, and we''ll see how they''ve each fared."

    Jonathan held back the retort that was on his mind¡ªthat he hoped Clark would never encounter a Luthor again. He was half convinced Lionel''s son must already be a little monster.

    He filled out the paperwork quietly, nodded when Lionel offered to come by the farm in a week to drop off the last papers, and stepped back into the helicopter to head back home with little more than a nod as a farewell.

    As soon as Jonathan reached the farm again and watched the helicopter fly away¡ªthinking to himself that he''d never allow another helicopter to land on his property for as long as he lived¡ªhe hurried into the house.

    Clark was crying in his high chair. Martha looked frazzled as she alternated between trying to soothe him with various toys and snacks, and stirring the pot on the stove.

    Jonathan gave his wife a quick kiss, then he went over to the high chair. He lifted the shaking, sobbing boy into his arms and held him tightly to his chest. He rubbed the boy''s back lightly at first, but then he decided that Lionel was right about one thing: two years old was sturdy enough to feel the strength of his father''s hand. Jonathan tightened his grip and rubbed his son''s back a bit more firmly, whispering into his ear, "I''ve got you, son. It''s okay. I love you."

    And Clark, feeling his father''s strength, sniffled, rested his head on Jonathan''s shoulder, and drifted off to sleep.

 Chapter 36: Scarecrow

    With the start of Lex''s freshman year at Smallville High came more freedom for him, in addition to more rules. He was allowed to hang out with friends or in the library at the school for up to an hour after school ended, but he had to make prior arrangements if he was going to take any longer getting home. He was allowed to go out in the evenings, but only if his homework was done, his room was clean, his chores were finished, and Onyx was taken care of.

    The most important rule, though, was that he had to be home by ten unless there was a school event or sleepover he''d gotten permission to attend. The curfew would raise to eleven when he turned sixteen, and to midnight if he was still living with them at eighteen. Jonathan made it very clear that missing curfew without permission was grounds for a hard lecture and a long, strict period of restriction. Lex didn''t seem to have any problems with it at the time.

    On the day of homecoming, Lex never came home from school at all.

    At first, Martha was the one who was concerned. "He said he didn''t want to participate in homecoming."

    "Well, maybe some of his friends changed his mind." Jonathan was glad for that¡ªthe kid could be a bit uptight.

    "I don''t know, honey. He''s been having a hard time making friends, and the few he has don''t really seem like the type to be into it."

    "Trust me, sweetheart. He''s absolutely fine. I bet we''ll see him at the game tonight."

    They didn''t see him at the game. Jonathan still wasn''t worried about it¡ªthe stadium was big enough that it was hard to pick out anyone¡ªbut Martha barely watched the field, constantly scanning the bleachers and gripping onto Clark on her lap, tight enough that it would have hurt him if he had been any other kid.

    She was still scanning the passing faces as they walked to the car. "I don''t see him, Jonathan."

    "He probably blended right into a crowd of other teenagers."

    "He stands out."

    "Not when he''s wearing his hat." Lex had taken to doing that whenever he was around other kids his age¡ªJonathan was thankful that the teachers at the high school were understanding about it.

    "What if he wasn''t there?"

    Jonathan sighed. "Then he''s at a friend''s house getting ready for the dance. He should have asked us permission, but he probably knew we would figure it out."

    "I don''t like it."

    "We''ll talk to him about it. But this is the first time he''s done this. I don''t think there''s any need to overreact."

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    Jonathan had completely changed his tune by 11:30. The dance had ended at eleven, and there was no sign of Lex.

    Martha paced in the living room, wringing her hands. "Jonathan, what if something happened?"

    "Something did happen. He defied us, that''s what. He''s testing us, you know. You know what my father would''ve done to me if I pulled something like this, he''d have¡ª"

    "You''re not making our son cut a switch."

    "No, I know." Jonathan''s face felt warm. "But he''s grounded for at least a month."

    Martha frowned. "That''s harsh."

    "He''s making his mother worry about him. That''s unacceptable."

    "Can we revisit punishment when we know whether he''s safe?"

    Jonathan forced himself to take a deep breath. He went over to grab his jacket. "I''m gonna find him. Trust me, Martha, he''s at a house party with some kid whose parents made the mistake of going out of town on Homecoming weekend. God help him if he''s been drinking."

    He gave Martha a quick kiss before heading out to get in his truck and driving toward the school.

    Jonathan drove past a cornfield on the way to the school, and his mind flashed back.

    He swallowed hard¡ªit couldn''t be, could it? It was one freshman out of hundreds each year, and Lex . . .

    Oh, no.

    Jonathan turned the truck around and drove to Reilly''s field. He pulled up to the edge, took a flashlight out of the backseat, and began to search through the cornfield.

    "Lex?" he called.

    A very weak voice answered back: "Help me."

    Jonathan ran toward the voice. He reached a clearing and shone his flashlight up at the figure hanging from the post. Lex''s eyes were half-closed, he was badly bruised and bleeding in several places, and the bright red S stood in stark contrast to his nearly-blue skin.

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    "Oh, no." Jonathan dropped the flashlight and rushed forward to untie his son. It must have been hours since he was hung there, and it was freezing outside¡ªJonathan could see his own breath. "Hang in there, Lex."

    His eyes fluttered open. "Jon''thn. I missed curfew."

    Jonathan almost laughed, though he didn''t smile at all. He untied Lex''s feet first, then he wasn''t sure how to proceed¡ªif he untied his arms, Lex would fall to the ground. Finally, Jonathan mustered his strength and lifted the whole pole with his son on it, laying it down gently so Lex was on his back before untying the ropes and pulling Lex''s arms away from the pole.

    Lex winced as he was adjusted, and shouted aloud when Jonathan tried to move his arms. "Sorry, son, this is gonna hurt." Jonathan slowly moved Lex''s arms back to his sides.

    Lex hissed, and his eyes filled with tears. "O-ow."

    Jonathan was going to kill whoever did this to his son.

    He swallowed his anger for the time being¡ªit wouldn''t help. "Can you walk?" Jonathan helped the boy to stand, but Lex kept tripping over his own feet. He wasn''t even shivering. That was a bad sign. Jonathan had learned more than he''d ever wanted to about hypothermia in his senior year, the year he''d passively gone alone with his friends when they''d played the prank on some poor freshman. The main perpetrators'' families had ended up covering the poor kid''s medical bills, and Jonathan''s father had made him learn about exactly what was happening to the boy they''d strung up, in addition to the other punishments Jonathan had had to endure. It had been one of the worst weeks of his life.

    In the end, Jonathan ended up carrying Lex back to the truck. He sat him down in the passenger''s seat, turned on the car to get the heater blowing, and went back into the field to find Lex''s clothes.

    When Jonathan returned to the truck, he found that Lex had turned off the heat in favor of cold air instead.

    "No, no." Jonathan changed it back. "You need to warm up."

    "Iss too hot."

    Jonathan grimaced. He wished he''d brought a thermos of hot chocolate¡ªhypothermia was often easier to treat from the inside than through warming the skin¡ªbut he couldn''t have known this was going to happen. Though of course, he should have known. He should have considered this hours ago, as soon as Lex didn''t come home from school. Most of the time, though, he tried to block the whole scarecrow incident out of his mind. He never would have considered that the tradition might have lasted another generation.

    Jonathan tried to help Lex put his shirt back on, but the boy cried out in pain every time Jonathan adjusted one of his arms¡ªthe way he''d been hanging must have been absolute torture. Finally, Jonathan took off his own jacket, draped it over Lex''s shoulders, and zipped it up with Lex''s arms tucked inside. Lex struggled for a moment, then nestled back into the seat, eyes falling closed. Jonathan swallowed hard, leaned over to give his son a light kiss on the forehead, and drove straight to the hospital.

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    Over the next few hours, Jonathan divided his time between the hospital room where Lex was being treated, and a little waiting room with a phone, where Martha drilled him with questions about what had happened. He was thankful she didn''t lay any guilt or I-told-you-so''s on him¡ªhe was already feeling guilty enough. She wanted to come to the hospital, but Jonathan had the truck, and neither of them wanted him to leave Lex alone to go pick her up.

    Jonathan made himself put on a stoic face as Lex was subjected to a breathing mask, chest tubes, and an IV. His temperature wasn''t rising, and the doctors were starting to talk about the possibility of using dialysis to warm his blood. But they didn''t end up needing to¡ªafter a couple of intensive hours of care, he was warm enough that they were able to give him cold compresses for his wounds, though they said the strained muscles in his shoulders could take weeks or even months to heal completely.

    At four in the morning, the doctor told Jonathan that Lex was stable, but he needed to stay for the next twenty-four hours to be monitored. Jonathan went into his hospital room to say good night to his son, and to let him know he was going to go pick up Martha. Lex sat on the bed edge of the bed, his shirt draped over his pillow. He stared down at his chest, where the red S had barely faded. He was trying to wipe it away with a wet paper towel, but he hadn''t made any progress¡ªJonathan figured his arms were too weak for him to put any muscle into it.

    "Hey." Jonathan sat beside him and held out his hand for the paper towel. Lex handed it over to him, and Jonathan carefully cleaned away as much of the paint as he could before helping him get his shirt back on.

    When Jonathan looked up at his son, Lex''s eyes were shining. "Kids at school, they hate me."

    "No, no. They don''t hate you, son."

    "My core temperature was 83. The doctors said I was lucky. If you''d waited ''til morning . . ." A tear streaked down Lex''s cheek. "Those guys wanted me dead, Jonathan."

    Jonathan had never felt such a heavy guilt in his life. "No. I guarantee you, they didn''t. They thought they were pulling a prank. They don''t know any better."

    "They beat me up. And they kept . . . taking my hat off so they could laugh at me and slap me. Then they''d put it back on just so they could take it off again."

    Jonathan said nothing. He still couldn''t believe he''d allowed the same thing all those years ago. He had never been so tempted to kill anyone in his life.

    "They''re right about me, though." Lex looked away, jaw pulsing. "I''m a Luthor."

    Jonathan set aside the paper towel and reached out to cradle Lex''s face in his hand, looking him right in the eyes. "You''re my son. Do you hear me?"

    Lex nodded, though a fresh set of tears rolled down his face.

    Jonathan pulled his beloved child into his arms, his own eyes stinging. "You''re my son," he whispered, rocking him slightly. "I love you so much."

    A quiet sob escaped from the boy, and Jonathan held him tighter.

    A light knock on the door¡ªJonathan glanced up. Martha stood in the doorway carrying Clark. Jonathan gave Lex a couple of pats on the back and stood to greet them.

    "Lex!" Clark jumped down from his mother''s arms and launched into Lex''s lap, wrapping his arms around Lex''s waist. "I''ll warm you up! Are you cold?"

    "No, I . . ." Lex looked down at Clark, who was snuggling his head into Lex''s neck. "Uh, yeah. Yeah, I am cold." Lex wrapped his arms lightly around his little brother, and Clark tightened his grip.

    Jonathan pulled Martha into his arms, and she reached up to kiss him on the cheek. "Abigail Ross gave us a ride," she said, answering the unspoken question. "Apparently her oldest son was in on the prank. Is Lex okay?"

    They glanced toward the hospital bed, where Clark was instructing Lex to lay down so he could put the blankets over him. At the last second, he crawled under the covers with Lex, nestled against his side. "I have to keep you warm," he explained, and Lex laughed.

    "I think he''s okay," Jonathan whispered.

    Martha went over to kiss each of her boys, then she left the room. Jonathan glanced back at his sons one more time before following her. Clark was already asleep, one hand lightly clinging to Lex''s shoulder. Lex lay on his side, eyes fixed on his little brother, tears streaming down his face. He gently brushed Clark''s hair aside and kissed his forehead.

    Jonathan swallowed back a hard lump in his throat and flicked off the light.

 Chapter 37: Off at College

    Clark helped his mom throw a small party when Lex first got his acceptance letter to Metropolis University. He bragged to all of his friends at school that his older brother was going to college on a full merit scholarship, he tagged along on all of the trips to pick up things for Lex''s dorm, and he sat in the middle seat to be closer to his older brother for the whole trip up to drop Lex off at the school¡ªsomething he hadn''t done in a long time, now that he was eleven and Lex was eighteen.

    It was quiet on the way back from Metropolis. Then it was quiet in the house.

    Lex hadn''t even talked all that much. But Clark talked to Lex constantly. Lex helped him with his school work, and their dad assigned chores to them out on the farm and gave instructions for how to divide up the work, or they all talked and laughed. Clark didn''t really need instructions, and he wasn''t in a joking mood, so they mostly worked in silence. Even at the dinner table, Clark felt too miserable about the empty seat across from him to make much conversation.

    For the first few weeks of the school year, Lex called almost every day. Clark took to doing his homework right next to the phone and procrastinating on chores for as long as possible. Over time, though, the calls became fewer and further between.

    Worse, Clark had to pick up extra chores because Lex was gone. His dad claimed that that wasn''t the reason, that it was because Clark was older and had more command over his powers, so he could handle more responsibility.

    "It''s not fair," Clark whined. "I''m in middle school now, I have more homework."

    "That''s true. You''re going to have to have better time management. It''s part of growing up."

    "I just have to do extra because you need more help."

    "Well, you''re not wrong, Clark. I do need you. That''s part of being in a family."

    Clark just groaned and cut as many corners on his chores as he could. A couple of times, his dad made him redo the work, but Clark refused to speak to him for the rest of the day when he did that.

    It wasn''t just the chores. Aside from having more homework now that he was in middle school, Clark''s homework took longer than ever without Lex''s help. He eventually started skipping it and lying to his parents when they asked if he''d finished his schoolwork. He hid his first quarter report card when it came out; he heard Lex had tried that once, and it hadn''t worked out for him, but Lex didn''t have powers. Clark had a much easier time sneaking it away.

    One evening after dinner, Clark was sitting in front of the TV. He liked it there; it distracted him from the silence that always filled the house. When his mom called him over to help dry the dishes, he just didn''t move. He pretended he didn''t hear her, and turned up the TV a little louder.

    He got unlucky. His dad came in right then.

    "Clark, did you hear what your mother said?"

    Clark groaned and turned down the TV a little. "That''s Lex''s chore. Why should I have to do it?"

    "Because your mother asked you to. Why should she have to do it?"

    Clark jumped up from his seat. Enough was enough. "Because you keep piling everything on me just because I have powers!"

    Jonathan took a step closer. "That''s not true, son¡ª"

    "I''m nothing but a piece of farming equipment to you. If I ran away, this whole farm would collapse."

    "Your powers come with added responsibility."

    "I didn''t choose this!"

    "Enough stalling, son. Go help your mother with the dishes."

    "No."

    "Clark, you''re about three seconds away from being grounded."

    Clark crossed his arms. "How are you gonna ground me? You can''t stop me from going out."

    His mom stormed into the living room. "Clark! How could you speak to your father like that?"

    "Lay off, Mom, you''re just as bad as he is."

    This content has been unlawfully taken from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.

    "Clark!" his dad yelled.

    His mom came to put a hand on his shoulder. "Sweetie, I know this is about Lex¡ª"

    Clark pulled his arm away. "Oh, so you do remember him. Your other son. Who used to live here."

    "Clark, we miss him, too. But¡ª"

    The phone rang, and it was silent.

    Clark took a step toward the kitchen, but his dad barked, "Stop. Let your mother get it." Clark rolled his eyes and went back to sit on the couch.

    Still fuming, he listened to his mom''s side of the conversation. "Hello? . . . Hi, sweetie. How are you? . . . No, no, that''s not important. I want to hear how things are for you . . . Ah, you know us too well . . . Yes, that''s still going on . . . Well, we had a little miscommunication . . . I know, but¡ª . . . No, I guess not . . . No, he hasn''t . . . That''s not your job, sweetie . . ." A much longer pause, and she sighed. "Okay. I''ll go get him."

    His mom came into the living room and handed him the phone. "It''s your brother."

    Clark''s heart skipped. He didn''t think about the fact that his mom might have been talking to Lex about what had been happening at home, but now he could explain what was going on. Lex would understand. He''d tell Mom and Dad they were being unreasonable.

    Clark put the phone to his ear. "Lex?"

    "Who the hell do you think you are, Clark?"

    "W-what?"

    "You''re the son of Jonathan and Martha Kent. They raised you and they took care of you, they fed you and housed you all these years, and for a little while, I had the privilege of living with you. And for the immense price of sharing your parents with me, you got a little of my help with chores and homework. And now I''m gone, and for some God-forsaken reason they actually miss me and they''re hurting, and you''re treat them like this?"

    "It''s not like that, Lex! They''re making me do all this extra work!"

    "Our father works his fingers down to the bone for us. You should have been doing extra work all this time. And what do you have to complain about, Clark? You can use your powers."

    "Not for everything," Clark mumbled. "It takes a lot of time."

    "What''s so damn important that you can''t spare a little extra time to help your family?"

    Clark glanced up at the TV, which was still going, although quietly. His stomach turned. He suddenly couldn''t remember what his aversion had been to helping his dad pick up the slack.

    "And what''s this about not doing your homework? What the hell, Clark?"

    Clark swallowed¡ªhe didn''t know his parents knew about that. "It''s really hard, and you''re not here to help me."

    "Then go to the tutoring center in the library after school! It''s not that complicated!"

    "But I miss you."

    "I miss you too, I think about you all the time, but you know what? I still do my damn homework."

    Clark flinched. "I''m sorry, Lex, I¡ª"

    "Oh, another thing. You''ve been giving Dad the silent treatment for making you redo chores when you''re the one who messed them up in the first place?"

    "Ah . . ." Clark winced.

    "What are you thinking, Clark?"

    "I just . . ." He was breathing in to say it wasn''t fair, but he suddenly didn''t feel like he had a leg to stand on. His hand holding the phone was shaking.

    "Mom and Dad love you. You think they pester you to do your homework because it''s fun for them? No, they want to do what''s best for you, they want you to have the best you can and be the best you can, and you''re treating them like crap for caring about you."

    "I''m sorry!" His voice cracked.

    "Don''t apologize to me, Clark, apologize to Mom and Dad. Go beg for their forgiveness, because God knows, they''ll give it to you. But you know what, if they want to punish you, you''re gonna let them. You''re not gonna make snide remarks about how they can''t stop you from going out. You''re not gonna whine about the extra chores, and you''re not gonna argue if they ground you. You''re gonna take it, because they love you, and I would have given anything, absolutely anything for someone to care about me that much when I was your age!"

    Clark''s eyes stung and overflowed. The past few weeks were coming back to him; he''d been absolutely horrible.

    "You''re lucky they don''t lock you in a room with meteor rocks. That''s what Lionel would have done to you if you were his kid. You know what he would have done to me if I showed him the kind of disrespect you''re showing Mom and Dad? He would have locked me in a dark closet and made me kneel on uncooked rice for as long as it took to make me start to bleed, and then he wouldn''t speak to me for a week after he let me out¡ª"

    Clark couldn''t hear any of the rest of it. He was shaking with sobs. Slowly, he took the phone away from his ear and hung his head, tears pouring down his face.

    His mom took the phone away from him. "Lex? Lex, baby, stop. Stop . . . Sweetie, he''s crying . . . Yeah . . . I know you didn''t mean to, but¡ª . . . Yeah, I know . . . I know . . . I miss you, too . . . Okay, I will . . . I will, Lex . . . We love you, too. Bye."

    Clark wrapped his arms around himself, trembling, and managed to choke out, "I''m sorry, I''m sorry, I''m sorry . . ."

    His mom''s soft hug enveloped him, then his father''s strong arms wrapped around both of them from the other side. "Okay, son," his dad said gently. "Sh, sh. You''re okay."

    Clark still couldn''t stop crying. "I¡ªI really miss h-him."

    "I know, baby," his mom said. "We miss him, too."

    When Clark could catch his breath, he pulled away, wiped at his eyes, and sniffed. "Am I grounded?"

    His mom looked up at his dad, who shook his head. "Not exactly, son. But we''re going to need to tighten the rules a little until you get your grades back up."

    Clark nodded. "I''m sorry."

    His dad squeezed his shoulder. "We forgive you."

    Another set of tears rolled down his cheeks. "Mom, c-can I help you with the dishes?"

    "Tomorrow," she said. "Your brother wants you to call him back."

    Clark nodded and walked back into the kitchen to pick up the phone.

    Lex picked up after one ring. "Hi."

    "Hey."

    Silence for a long time.

    "I''m sorry, Clark, I¡ª"

    "No, I''m sorry. Thank you, Lex."

    "It was too much."

    "No, it wasn''t."

    Silence again.

    "I love you, little brother."

    The room grew blurry once more, and Clark smiled. "I love you too, Lex."

 Chapter 38: Lex & Onyx

    1

    The Kents let Lex stay home from school for a few days after the scarecrow incident. The day he came home from the hospital, he was tired from the hypothermia treatments and sore from the way his arms had been wrenched behind his back, and as embarrassed as he would have been to admit it, he really appreciated the Kents'' doting comfort.

    He thought he''d get through it, until a friend called to tell him that Mercy was breaking up with him for standing her up at the Homecoming dance. Lex didn''t know what to say to that; he thanked his friend for calling and hung up. It wasn''t as if Lex could tell Mercy he''d been strung up by the football team. She''d just break up with him for being a loser¡ªbetter to lose her this way. He just really wished he didn''t have to lose her at all.

    The worst part was that he couldn''t complain about it in front of the Kents, which meant he couldn''t count on them for comfort. He''d never actually told them about Mercy. Clark knew¡ªkind of¡ªbut Lex didn''t want to talk to his seven-year-old brother about getting his heart broken. He knew he could go to his little brother for general comfort and reassurance if he needed it, but right now, Clark was at school, and Lex had had as much of Martha''s comfort as his pride could take.

    So when Lex was sure Jonathan was busy with outdoor chores, he picked up a couple of sugar cubes and slipped into the barn to see Onyx.

    Onyx responded immediately to Lex''s presence, as she always did, coming right up to the stall door and reaching toward him with her head. As soon as Lex was close enough, she reached her nose down and sniffed at his pocket and nudged at his hand.

    "Here, girl," he said, taking the sugar cubes out of his pocket and holding his hand flat.

    She licked up the sugar, then nuzzled the top of his head.

    "There you go." He patted her neck, then he opened the stall door and joined her inside. Her head turned toward the brush he usually used on her, but he didn''t pick it up. Instead, he wrapped his around her neck and rested his head in her mane. "At least you still like me."

    Onyx gently leaned into his embrace.

    <hr>

    2

    Lex stormed into the barn.

    "I was only twenty minutes late!" he muttered under his breath. He grabbed a pitch fork and began to muck out the stalls. He usually took the task slowly and carefully, so as not to startle the animals or pull a muscle, but today he worked hard and fast, until sweat began to drip down the back of his neck.

    Most of the horses left in the barn backed away from him. Onyx was the exception. She drew closer, flinching slightly with his jerkier motions, until he finally threw down the pitchfork.

    He threw himself onto her side. "They grounded me for two whole weeks, Onyx. Extra chores, too."

    He wasn''t going to make it to Steve''s party. He''d said he would be there, and now he wouldn''t be. That was social suicide. He''d spent the whole year since the scarecrow incident fighting to regain social status and fit in, and now he was going to blow that with a single bad move.

    And the Kents didn''t even care. Jonathan had seemed almost happy when Lex had mentioned the party. They were so mean.

    Of course, they hadn''t said it in a mean way, and they had warned him he''d be grounded if he missed curfew, and Martha had been really worried last night . . .

    "I mean . . . I didn''t call them, I guess, and okay, they were worried about me . . . but two weeks! For twenty minutes!"

    It just wasn''t fair. Lex almost considered sneaking out for Steve''s party, and he even had a plan halfway formed in his mind, but he couldn''t bring himself to do it. Jonathan would find out, Lex was absolutely certain of that. And aside from grounding Lex until he was eighteen and forcing him to do chores until his arms and legs fell off, Jonathan would be so, so disappointed, and he''d make Lex listen while he told him all about how disappointed he was. And Martha would be worried and maybe crying¡ªshe''d been close by the time he''d gotten home the night before.

    "Arrgh . . . I can''t even be upset with them. They''ve been so nice to me, and . . . ugh, I messed up everything . . ."

    To Lex''s horror, his eyes began to sting. Onyx gently nudged the side of his head with her nose and exhaled.

    It hit him then that there was no way to get out of the grounding, and no way to earn their trust back. He sank down onto a chair beside her and dissolved into tears.

    Onyx took the couple of steps that separated them and reached down with her head to gently nuzzle the side of his. She stayed there until he was able to calm himself down and wipe his tears away.

    "I''ll be okay, girl," he whispered, and he kissed her between the eyes.

    <hr>

    3

    For days after Lionel''s death, Martha couldn''t leave Lex alone for more than a few minutes at a time. She had assumed he would need time alone to grieve. Based on the bits she had gleaned from his stories, he had certainly needed time alone when Lillian passed. But when she left him alone for an hour one afternoon, she came back to find he had torn through the skin around his own fingernails and his fingers were dripping blood. Her seventeen-year-old son needed more supervision than her nine-year-old.

    Lex blamed himself for Lionel''s death. That much was obvious. Martha didn''t completely understand why, though she suspected it had something to do with the last visit they''d had¡ªwhich Lex still wouldn''t talk about. He alternated between dead silence, hysterics, fits of rage, long episodes of deep self-deprecation, and once or twice, hallucinations. He also had night terrors so bad that she made him sleep on the couch in the living room, and she slept on the arm chair beside him. It was a role she''d had to play a few times when his father was first imprisoned, but she had hoped those days were behind them.

    She sewed and read in his bedroom while he read or studied at his desk, she had him help her in the kitchen (though she kept the knives away from him), and she worked in the living room while he lay on the couch. From time to time she passed him off to Clark, who would try and fail to play with him or make conversation, or to Jonathan, who was quick with a word of wisdom¡ªadmittedly, often clich¨¦ and trite, given the circumstances¡ªthat fell upon deaf ears.

    This story originates from Royal Road. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there.

    By the end of the week, they were all starting to fall behind on farm work and everything else. Lex''s teachers were understanding; the farm, not so much. Martha needed to help Jonathan with farm work, and Clark needed to focus on school work¡ªhe couldn''t help catch up, and they couldn''t expect him to make up for the work Lex wasn''t doing, even with his powers. One morning, after waking up from another restless night on the armchair, Martha took Lex out to the barn with her so that she could get some chores done.

    As soon as they reached the barn, she walked Lex over to Onyx, who came right over to Lex and nudged him repeatedly¡ªnot in the hands or pockets, as though she were looking for treats, but in the face, head, and shoulders. Lex stood, taking it without responding, without so much as reaching up to pat the horse''s neck.

    Martha let go of Lex''s hand and stroked Onyx''s mane. "Take care of my boy for a minute, okay, girl?"

    Onyx paid her no attention. She was absorbed in checking on Lex, whose eyes had filled with tears.

    Martha gave her son a quick kiss on the cheek as she passed him¡ªhe was taller than she was, now¡ªand went to pick up a pitchfork to clean out the other stalls.

    When she returned to the stall, she found Lex curled up on a pile of hay in the corner. Onyx lay beside him; his face was buried in the underside of her neck. Martha smiled and took a step toward him, but Onyx huffed at her, a warning to stay back. Martha nodded and returned to her work.

    <hr>

    4

    Lex knew Jonathan would be a great person to talk to, about how to ask out the girl he liked. The trouble was, he''d never actually told the Kents he liked her. Or that she existed at all. He couldn''t bear the thought of telling them she''d rejected him. And he fully expected she would.

    Coming up with the speech to ask her out was proving to be a challenge; he found himself getting up and pacing and muttering the words under his breath every time he tried to plan it.

    He had his own apartment, but he also had a roommate, since he still didn''t want anyone to know about his money. Duncan was great, but he was also pretty focused. Lex didn''t want to bother him by pacing around the apartment. Lex also couldn''t use his room back at the Kent house. Clark''s super hearing was a pretty big inconvenience.

    So he spent some time in the barn when no one else was in there. There, he paced and muttered to his heart''s content.

    "Anastasia . . . I¡ªwe''ve been talking for a few months now, I was just thinking, maybe sometime, do you wanna . . . ugh, no . . . Look, I really like you, and¡ªno. Stupid." Lex went over to Onyx''s stall and tapped his forehead against the wood. "Stupid, stupid."

    A soft, wet roughness pressed into the top of his head.

    "Augh!" Lex jumped back and wiped away Onyx''s saliva. "Onyx, that''s gross."

    She just stared at him, looking concerned.

    Sighing, he opened the stall door and came inside to pat her neck. "Hey there, girl."

    Onyx leaned into him a little.

    "Guess you''ve never had to deal with this sort of thing. I''ve, ah, set the bar pretty high for myself, in terms of . . . eloquence. But this is giving me grief."

    She nudged his hand.

    He laughed and took out a sugar cube from his pocket, holding it out to her with a flat hand. "Hm. Wonder if she likes horses."

    <hr>

    5

    Anastasia wasn''t much for horses, as it turned out¡ªbut Martha Nicole was.

    She loved all of the animals, but she ran straight over to Onyx every time they were in the barn, and she snuck her more sugar cubes than she was supposed to be allowed to have. At home, she read picture books about horses and drew pictures of them as best as she could, and, when she started preschool, she picked out a backpack and lunch box covered in horses as well. She begged Lex at least once a week from the time she turned three to let her ride Onyx on her own. He was happy to put his daughter on his back while he rode on the saddle, or to put her in front of him while he rode bare back, but she was his first kid, and he was hesitant to let her ride by herself.

    Lex talked with his dad, who had been around horses for longer than Lex had been alive. He seemed to think it would be okay, as long as she wore a helmet, but even with Jonathan Kent''s seal of approval, Lex made his baby wait until she was four.

    On the day he''d agreed to it, Nicole released herself from her booster seat almost before the car had come to a stop, and she bounded away toward the farm. Lex had to run to catch up with her.

    "Hi Onnist! I''m gonna ride you today, okay?"

    Lex made himself smile against the worried tightening in his throat. "It''s Onyx, Nicole."

    "Onnits."

    "Onyx." He emphasized the x.

    "Onnisk."

    Nikki was so young. So tiny. The saddle would be up at twice her height. "Um, Nikki, are you sure you want¡ª"

    "Daddy, you said."

    "I did, and I''ll keep my word if you''re sure. You know that. It''s just, I''m happy to sit with you."

    "I''m not three anymore."

    "I know, but . . . I know you love horses, but they can be a little scary, too."

    "Onnist isn''t scary. She''s the prettiest, nicest-est horsie ever."

    Lex swallowed hard and looked up at Onyx.

    Moving very slowly, Onyx moved her head down to nudge Nicole''s dirty blond braids. "Good girl," Nicole said, patting Onyx''s nose.

    Lex took a deep breath. Nicole could handle this. More importantly, Onyx could.

    Onyx remained very, very still as Lex saddled her up and put on Nicole''s helmet, and even stiller as he lifted Nicole onto her, remaining close beside her in case his daughter started to lose her balance.

    As soon as she was up, Nicole''s face lit up in a bright grin. "Daddy, look at me!"

    "I''m looking, sweetheart."

    Onyx took a couple of very, very slow steps toward the edge of the barn. "I''m on a horse!" Nicole squealed.

    "I see you, baby." Lex''s throat choked up. He kept one hand on Nicole''s knee as they walked, though he knew he didn''t need to. He''d never seen Onyx walk so slowly or so smoothly in his entire life.

    <hr>

    +1

    Onyx was tired. So, so tired.

    It was the way she usually felt after a long ride, but it had been awhile since anyone had ridden her. Time was she''d only laid down for a couple of hours a night, but one morning, she didn''t have the strength to pull herself back up to stand, and she''d been lying down ever since.

    Her human¡ªthe one they called Lex¡ªcame to stay with her for a couple of days, and he barely left her side. These days, Lex didn''t come around as often as he used to when he was younger. He''d gotten so much taller since she''d first met him, but his head was always smooth. None of the other humans Onyx knew were like that.

    "Hey there, girl." Lex''s voice cracked as he sat down on the floor of the barn beside her after taking a quick trip back to the house. "Got something for you."

    He held out a sugar cube, but Onyx didn''t have the strength to lift her head to take it from him.

    "Ah. Sorry." He held it right up to her mouth.

    She licked it up happily. She wished she could nuzzle his head like she used to, but she just couldn''t muster up the strength.

    Lex picked up her brush and swept circles in her side. Her eyes closed halfway. She always loved it when he did that.

    "There you go," he said after a few minutes. "Sorry I can''t get to the other side of you. I could get Clark in here to roll you over, but I don''t want to leave you. Dad says¡ª" His eyes became shiny.

    Her human was sad. He needed her comfort. But she couldn''t lift her head more than a couple of inches off the ground.

    "Ah. Here." He lay down beside her so that her nose was right at the top of his head, and she nuzzled it gently.

    "Anastasia called. Nikki sends her love. She wanted to be here, but, ah, she''s only nine," he whispered.

    Nikki was Lex''s tiny human¡ªthe one he protected, so Onyx had always been very careful with her.

    "She cried when I told her . . . well, she''s going to miss you. Maybe even more than I will." He was quiet for a few moments, then he sniffed and spoke again. "Mom thinks we''ll see each other again, you and me. I dunno if that''s true. But if an animal ever deserved heaven . . ."

    Onyx didn''t understand what he was saying. But she didn''t need to understand him. She just liked his voice.

    "I love you, girl." He shifted a little closer to her and put his hand on her neck. "You were good to us."

    His hand was nice and warm. Her muscles relaxed, her eyes fell closed, and she went to sleep.

 Chapter 39: The Prisoner

    A month after Lex''s father was incarcerated, Lex went to visit him at the prison.

    Jonathan drove him to the facility, and he offered to come sit with Lex, but Lex turned him down. He was thirteen years old, and he wasn''t a coward. He didn''t need someone to hold his hand.

    He sat across from his father on a hard plastic chair, glass separating them, and picked up the phone. "Hi Dad."

    His father merely stared at him. No¡ªhe stared past him, at a point in the distance. It took Lex a moment to notice that his father hadn''t picked up the phone.

    Lex gestures to his own phone, then pointed through the glass at his father.

    His father kept staring off into the distance, though his eyes narrowed a bit.

    Lex tapped on the glass.

    Finally, his father''s eyes locked onto his. He gave Lex a sneer, the one before which Lex knew to tremble, and he picked up the phone.

    Lex took a deep breath. "I just wanted to say I . . . Dad, I''m so sorry¡ª"

    "You are not my son," he stated simply. "Get out."

    With that, his father stood and walked away.

    Lex held onto his composure for the ride home, but he cried into his pillow when he got back to his room. Martha found him there and held him, gently rocking him and rubbing his back until he confessed what had happened. The confession spurred a new round of tears from both of them, but as soon as the words were out, he felt an odd sense of relief. He wasn''t Lionel Luthor''s son anymore. He was Jonathan Kent''s. His biological father had at least given him that much.

    That''s what he tried to tell himself, anyway.

    <hr noshade="noshade" size="1">

    Denying his own blood was easier said than done.

    A year after the incarceration, when Lex was fourteen, he worked up the courage to ask Jonathan to take him for a second visit. It took a long time to try to explain why he wanted to see his father, and when that failed, it took even longer to convince Jonathan to go along with it even though he didn''t understand.

    The truth was, Lex wasn''t ready to let go. Not completely. He was a year older, and he had come a long way, but he still had questions for his father. He didn''t want to keep holding on to a childhood he had never had, and he didn''t want to seem ungrateful for everything the Kents had done for him, but he couldn''t just stop himself from loving his dad and wanting to be loved in return. He couldn''t help but think that if they just talked things out, they could come to some sort of understanding.

    They sat in a supervised room this time with other prisoners and visitors, no longer separated by glass. Jonathan sat close enough that his elbow pressed gently against Lex''s. It was a comfort, even though Lex''s stomach turned as his father took a seat across from them.

    Lex sat up as straight as he could. "Dad," he said.

    "Lex," his father said.

    His dad wasn''t ignoring him. That was a big step.

    "I wanted to talk to you about . . . everything."

    "That''s a tall order for a ten-minute visit."

    Lex swallowed and looked over at Jonathan, whose eyes were locked on his father. Jonathan wasn''t going to be helpful with this.

    Lex cleared his throat. "I know you don''t love me, and, um, it''s okay, I don''t need you to, uh . . . But I just wanted to know if it''s just because of Julian, or¡ª"

    "Don''t say his name."

    "Sorry." Lex''s cheeks burned, and he looked down at his hands. "But, uh, about my question¡ª"

    "You''re weak, Lex. You''ve always been weak. How could you expect me to be anything but ashamed of you?"

    Lex didn''t catch much of what happened after that. Jonathan lunged for his father, and three police officers had to break them up. Lex and Jonathan ended up at the police station for another two hours giving their statements, but Lex was in a fog.

    He didn''t cry this time. Instead, he expressed himself with anger.

    He mostly kept it away from his adoptive parents, but he worked up a sullen attitude that he took with him to school, earning him more time in detention than he cared to admit. Whenever he had to stay after school for detention, he told the Kents that he was going to study group, and they never caught him in his lie.

    It took three months for Lex to slip and accidentally take out his bitterness on Clark when Martha and Jonathan weren''t watching. Clark cried so hard, Lex ended up having to bribe him for forgiveness by promising two weeks'' allowance worth of ice cream. Even after that, Lex ended up sitting with Clark on his lap, holding him close and stroking his hair, for nearly ten minutes, waiting for the tears to subside.

    Lex knew he had to change his attitude. He resolved to do better at school, and he tried to move on with his life.

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    In the year when Lex was fifteen, he put a note on his calendar at the start of August to stop by the prison. As much as he hated to admit it, and as desperate as he was to find the Kents sufficient, he still wanted and needed his biological father''s love. But since he couldn''t have that, he wondered if they could reach a compromise if he went back to the prison one more time.

    But he kept putting it off. It was September by the time he brought it up to his adoptive parents, and Jonathan refused to take him. They had an argument about it, but Martha finally agreed to drive him.

    Lex asked Martha to wait for him outside of the visiting room.

    His father looked older than the last time Lex had seen him, much older than the year that had passed. Lex sat down across from him at the table, noting that he was wearing hand cuffs this time.

    Stolen from its rightful author, this tale is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

    "What do you want from me, Lex?" his father asked.

    "I don''t need you to love me. That''s a lost cause."

    "So you''re here for what, money?"

    "No. I''m here to request forgiveness."

    There was a long pause. Lex couldn''t quite pull in a breath.

    "You hurt me," Lex said. "You . . . abused me. I know I deserved it for Julian, and I''m sorry you''re in here, but I think I paid for . . . for¡ª"

    "For your brother," his father said.

    "It was an accident. I swear. I don''t even remember wanting to hurt him."

    "Lex¡ª"

    "I don''t need you to love me. I don''t even need you to like me. But . . . if you could . . ."

    His father''s eyes softened for a moment, and he leaned forward in his chair. He held out a cuffed hand, and Lex took it.

    Then he said, "What in God''s name gives you the idea that I would ever forgive you?"

    Lex''s eyes fell closed, and his head dropped.

    "I wish Julian had been the one to live," his father said. "There was strength in his eyes, even as an infant. Strength I never saw in yours. From the moment you were born¡ª"

    Lex didn''t need to hear any more. He wrenched his hand away, stood, and walked out of the visiting room.

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    The following year, Lex doubled down on his therapy sessions. He was pretty sure the expense was driving the Kents to bankruptcy, but there was nothing he could do about it. His PTSD was getting in the way of his schoolwork, and it was making it impossible to continue trusting his adoptive parents, but more that, the night terrors and hallucinations about Julian had started back up.

    One of the sessions with his therapist involved an exercise that unlocked repressed memories. That was how he learned the truth about how Julian had died.

    Lex had had no intention of going to visit Lionel ever again. But now he couldn''t help it. The August after his sixteenth birthday, he drove his own car to the prison without his adoptive parents'' knowledge.

    There was definite surprise in Lionel''s eyes as they met again in the visiting room. "You don''t quit, do you?" he asked. "Maybe I underestimated you."

    "Maybe." Lex couldn''t bring himself to sit in the chair across from Lionel. He remained standing, and Lionel did as well; the guard didn''t say anything about it. "I''ve been visiting a therapist."

    "Have you, now."

    "Yes. She''s been helping me recover some old memories."

    Lionel raised an eyebrow. "More melodramatic stories about how I failed you as a father?"

    "No. I remembered something about Julian."

    That shut Lionel up. His eyebrows raised in a mock amusement that didn''t quite hide his disgust or grief.

    "I didn''t kill him."

    Lionel''s eyes widened. "Lex, I understand that you need to, uh, excuse your behavior, but I, uh . . . I saw you, Lex. I saw you standing over Julian''s crib."

    Lex looked down at his hands and took a deep breath. He had to resist the voice inside that told him he was betraying his mother by confessing the truth. She was gone; he didn''t need her protection anymore. "Mom did it."

    Lex heard Lionel''s gasp, but he couldn''t bring himself to look up into his face.

    "I walked in, and I found her." Lex could feel the sting of tears, but he didn''t care. Not anymore. "My therapist says I repressed the memory, because it was too traumatic."

    "Don''t you dare. I won''t let you desecrate your mother''s memory like that."

    Lex looked up into Lionel''s eyes. "I don''t blame her. I blame you."

    "What are you talking about? Your mother loved Julian. She would never . . . she wasn''t capable of murdering her own child! She loved him!"

    "Loved him so much, she couldn''t bear the thought of subjecting him to your particular brand of parenting."

    Lionel''s face went deathly pale, and he turned away. He paced for a moment, wringing his hands despite the handcuffs, then he returned to Lex. "Alright, Lex. Why would you take the blame for your brother''s death?"

    "Because I was your sole remaining heir, Dad. I knew you wouldn''t let anything happen to me. But Mom . . . she would be the lamb to the slaughter."

    "Oh . . ." Shock and pain filled Lionel''s eyes. "Oh!"

    Lex stood and watched him suffer. In the depths of his own pain, he felt no sympathy

    "I . . ." Lionel stammered¡ªLex had never seen him like this before. "If I''d known, if . . . If I''d seen . . ." Lionel stepped toward him and took the front of his shirt in hand.

    The guard caught Lex''s eye¡ªLex shook his head, then turned back to Lionel.

    Lionel trembled as he spoke. "Things would''ve been s-so different between us."

    "Yes, Dad." Lex''s jaw clenched. "You might''ve actually loved me."

    "I¡ªI d¡ª"

    "No. No." Lex pulled away from Lionel and left the facility.

    His mother was waiting for him at the door when he arrived home, mere seconds before his curfew. He stepped into her arms, rested his head on her shoulder, and wept.

    <hr noshade="noshade" size="1">

    Lex understood why Lionel had hated him after Julian died.

    Despite his parents and therapists constantly reminding him that the abuse he''d faced in the wake of Julian''s death wasn''t his fault, and that Lionel should have treated him better, Lex couldn''t help but sympathize with Lionel for that part. Lex was going through hell, but so was his father. He knew what it was like to lose a brother and a mother; he couldn''t imagine losing a wife and son.

    What Lex didn''t understand was why Lionel had hated him before that.

    Lionel had hated Lex long before Julian''s death. For awhile, Lex thought it might have had to do with losing his hair, but the abuse had started long before even then. He''d considered the possibility that Lionel was simply incapable of love, but he had loved Julian, and Lillian.

    Lex had wanted to understand, needed to understand. Maybe that was why he kept going back to the prison.

    He didn''t wait until the following August to visit Lionel again. He went shortly after his seventeenth birthday. This time, for the first time, he knew exactly what he needed to say.

    Lex knew Lionel wasn''t getting any other visits in prison. He might have expected Lionel to look forward to talking with someone. But if Lionel was happy to see Lex, he didn''t show it. For that matter, if he was angry or surprised, he didn''t show that either.

    He sat across from Lex and asked in an even voice, "What could you possibly want from me now?"

    "Nothing. I want nothing from you."

    Lionel''s eyebrows raised. "Go on."

    "You . . . don''t love me."

    "This again, Lex?"

    "I was weak, a disgrace. I never earned your love. But love isn''t something I should have had to earn. Love was something I needed, something I deserved just for being yours, and you . . . you never . . ." Lex''s eyes watered, more than he had bargained for. A tear slid down his cheek.

    The slightest hints of a sneer played with the corners of Lionel''s lips.

    Lex sniffed and wiped his eyes, only to find his tears replaced with new ones. "I¡ªI know that look. You think I''m weak. But I can assure you, I''m stronger now than ever. My new parents taught me that . . . crying isn''t weakness. Emotion isn''t unmanly. And strength isn''t everything."

    "Ah yes. The Kents."

    Lionel''s tone was so flippant, Lex wanted to slap him, but he forced himself to stay strong. For years, he''d been trying to figure out what to say to Lionel, how to make his father love him. When that had failed, he''d tried to make himself stop loving Lionel. But somewhere along the way, he''d made peace with his inability to do either. Lex sniffed again.

    "Skip the drama, Lex. What do you want?"

    "Nothing. That''s what I came to tell you. I''m done trying. I don''t hold anything against you anymore."

    Real surprise showed in Lionel''s expression. "Lex, what are you saying?"

    Lex loved Lionel; Lionel was ashamed of him. It wasn''t okay, and it would never be okay but . . . he was okay.

    He forced himself to look his biological father right in the eyes. "I''m saying I forgive you."

    Lionel''s eyes were wide. He just stared, jaw slack.

    "I¡ªI know you don''t care, and it''s . . . it''s not even for you, it''s more for me, but . . . I just needed to tell you. I forgive you."

    Silence.

    "Uh . . . that''s all." Lex stood. He waited another second or two, just in case Lionel wanted to say something, anything, in return, but he didn''t really expect anything. He wiped his eyes one last time and left the prison.

    Maybe in another year, Lex could return. They could start to rebuild their relationship, or start a new one. Or not¡ªit didn''t matter to Lex either way. He felt like a weight had been removed from his shoulders, like a dark shadow had been carved away from his soul.

    At last, he was free.

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    The next day, a police officer came to the front door at the Kent house with news for Lex.

    Lionel had hung himself.

 Chapter 40: Fighting

    Before Lex had come to stay with them, Clark had always told Pete that he was lucky to have older brothers. Pete always told him he was lucky not to have any. After meeting Lex, Clark didn''t understand what Pete was talking about.

    Then Lex got stupid.

    It started during Christmas break. Clark was so excited to have two whole weeks with no school or homework. He would still have to do his chores, but other than that, he could play with his older brother all day, every day! It got even better when he looked out the window on that first Saturday afternoon¡ªthere was snow on the ground outside! Clark''s dad never let him have snowball fights with his friends, because he might end up showing off his powers, but Lex already knew about his powers. Lex could remind Clark to keep being gentle, and he could finally have his first real snowball fight.

    Clark raced up the stairs to Lex''s room to tell him, but Lex had a couple of his friends from school in his room. That was okay¡ªthey could all play together.

    "Hey Lex! It''s snowing!"

    Lex wasn''t nearly as excited as Clark was hoping. "Yeah. It''s December."

    "We should have a snowball fight!"

    "I''m with my friends right now."

    Clark bounced on his toes. "Let''s all play together!"

    "Nah, a snowball fight with the four of us could get a little rough. Not sure your parents would be okay with it."

    Clark knew Lex was probably right about that, since Clark wasn''t allowed to have snowball fights with anyone outside of the family. "We could build snowmen. Or make snow angels."

    Lex glanced over his shoulder at his friends, who were watching him. "That stuff''s for babies. Go ask your mom to play with you."

    Clark''s shoulders slumped. "But Le-ex!"

    "Leave us alone, Clark. I''ve got my other friends over."

    "I like you better than my other friends!"

    "Okay, but I''m around you all the time. I''m only with my friends for today."

    "Well, can I hang out in here?"

    Lex''s head dropped back. "Fine, fine, just . . . be quiet and stay out of our way."

    Clark stepped into the room slowly. His friends weren''t even doing anything. One of the guys was listening to music on his head phones, another one was flipping through a comic book. Lex himself lay on his bed and picked up a tennis ball. He tossed it into the air and caught it, over and over.

    Teenagers were boring. Clark paced a little, then he sat down on the carpet. He made a little popping noise with his mouth, then a louder one.

    "Clark," Lex said.

    "What?" Clark made another popping noise.

    "You''re being annoying on purpose."

    "No, I''m not. I''m just having fun. Like you guys." Clark made the noise again, then again, louder.

    Lex''s voice lowered to a whisper. "Go away, Clark. Please?"

    Clark stuck out his lower lip and crossed his arms, stomping all the way to his room and slamming the door behind him. He plunked down on his bed and sulked.

    His mom was in his doorway a minute later, her hands on her hips. "Clark, what''s the rule about slamming doors in the house?"

    "Lex is being mean!"

    His mom dropped her arms and frowned. "What did he do?"

    "He likes his friends more than me."

    "He said that?" Her eyebrows raised.

    "Well . . . no . . . but he doesn''t want to play with me. He just wants to play with them. And they''re not even doing anything!"

    She let her breath out and came to sit beside him. "Lex is a teenager, sweetie. He needs time with his big kid friends."

    "But it''s the first snow."

    "I know, but there will be lots more snow this season. You can play with Lex when his friends go home."

    Clark kicked his feet a little. "Can you make his friends go home now?"

    "Their parents are coming to pick them up in a couple of hours."

    "A couple of hours?" That was forever!

    "You can play in the snow by yourself for a little while. You played by yourself all last winter."

    "I didn''t even have a brother then!"

    "Exactly." His mom stood from his bed.

    Clark sighed and put on a jacket. He didn''t really need it, but she would nag him about it if he didn''t wear one. She held out a hand, but he ignored it and just walked beside her. He didn''t need Lex or his teenager friends to see him holding his mom''s hand like a baby.

    Out in the snow, Clark managed to mostly forget about Lex for a little while. He ran around, made snow angels, built a snowman, and threw snowballs into the air. Before long, he''d made a muddy mess out of the driveway¡ªthe snow wasn''t really thick enough to be playing much, and it definitely wasn''t enough to pull out his sled yet¡ªbut it was still fun.

    His mom called him in for dinner, and he wiped off his dirty shoes before going to sit across from Lex at the table. That''s when he remembered he was still mad at Lex for ignoring him. He quietly began picking at the food his mom served up to him, until his dad gave him a stern look and he sat up a little straighter, eating normally.

    "Can you pass the butter, Clark?" Lex asked.

    Clark made a face. "Why don''t you get your big kid friends to do it?"

    "Clark," his dad said, in a voice that meant he was going to be in trouble soon.

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    "Fine." Clark sighed and handed over the butter.

    "Thanks," Lex said.

    Clark didn''t talk for the rest of the meal. His parents talked a little to each other, but he mostly snuck glares at Lex when his dad wasn''t looking. Unfortunately, Lex wasn''t really looking, either.

    After dinner, Clark took up his station drying dishes, waiting for Lex to come over to wash.

    Lex shook his head. "I''m drying tonight."

    "No. You dried last night."

    "That doesn''t count. There were only, like, two dishes last night."

    "It doesn''t matter! We take turns!"

    "Lex," their dad said, "you''re washing tonight."

    Lex groaned. "Jonathan."

    "If you''d rather argue with me, you can wash and dry."

    "Ha!" Clark said.

    Clark''s dad turned to him. "Clark, you can get up early tomorrow and muck out stalls, if you''re going to mock your brother."

    Clark''s cheeks felt hot. He glared up at Lex, and this time, Lex glared back.

    It was extra difficult to get through the dishes without breaking anything with his strength.

    After dishes, Clark raced over to the couch. He looked around for the remote, but Lex came in and took it out of his pocket.

    "You watch baby shows every night," Lex said. "It''s my turn."

    "That''s because Mom and Dad let you stay up later, so you get to watch TV after I''m in bed."

    "Like they''d let me watch anything that comes on that late."

    Clark pouted. "You''re not being fair."

    "I had to wash the dishes tonight, and you barely had to do anything last night. You''re not fair."

    "You stole the remote before dinner and put it in your pocket!"

    Lex raised an eyebrow. "You have super speed. How else am I supposed to compete with that?"

    Clark lunged for the remote. Lex held it back, and Clark ended up knocking him over on accident, and the remote skittered across the floor. Lex scrambled to his feet, and Clark went straight for the remote¡ªbut his mom had already come in to pick it up.

    "What has gotten into you two?" she yelled.

    Clark smoothed out his clothes. "Lex stole the remote!"

    Lex rolled his eyes. "He gets it every night."

    His mom said, "I''ve had it with this fighting. No TV for either of you tonight."

    Clark''s jaw dropped. "But Mom!"

    "See?" Lex turned to glower at Clark. "Now you''ve wrecked things for both of us."

    "You''re the one who stole the remote in the first place!"

    Lex looked away, shaking his head. "You''ve been impossible all day."

    "You wouldn''t play with me!"

    "I play with you every single day, Clark! You couldn''t leave me alone for two hours to hang out with my friends?"

    "It was the first snow! You missed it ''cause you were being a stupid teenager!" Clark''s voice cracked.

    "And you don''t understand anything because you''re a stupid baby!"

    That really hurt. Clark felt tears in his eyes, but he couldn''t let them out¡ªthen Lex would really think he was a baby.

    "BOYS."

    Clark jumped, startled. He hadn''t even noticed his dad come into the room. Clark hadn''t seen him look so angry since the time Clark had tried to drive the tractor on his own.

    "Up to my room. Now."

    Clark jumped to obey, followed by Lex. His heart felt like it was pounding a million times a second. His dad had never sent them to his room before.

    He didn''t talk to Lex while they waited in their parents'' bedroom. Lex paced a little, mumbling to himself. Clark wrapped his arms around himself, sniffling.

    His dad came in a couple of minutes later. He walked right past the two of them, rummaged through his top drawer, and took out an oversized t-shirt that Clark had never seen him wear. He tore at the shirt collar, widening it, then said, "Get over here."

    Clark took a step toward his father, while Lex took a step back. "No way," Lex said.

    "What?" Clark looked back at Lex.

    "He''s going to make us both wear it," Lex said.

    Clark gasped. "A-at the same time?"

    "It''s a trick parents use to try to make little kids get along."

    It sounded awful¡ªClark didn''t want to be closer to Lex! Lex was being mean! "Dad, no!"

    "I''ll give you a choice," their dad said. "You both get over here, or you''re both grounded until Christmas Eve."

    This time, Lex stepped toward Dad, and Clark stepped away.

    "Come on, Clark," Lex said through clenched teeth, "don''t get me grounded."

    Clark smirked. He didn''t have anywhere to be, but if they were grounded, Lex couldn''t hang out with his teenager friends. Clark raced forward and ripped the t-shirt from his dad''s hands, tearing it in two.

    He was still enjoying his victory when Lex''s fist slammed into his stomach. "You''re such a baby!" he yelled.

    It didn''t hurt his skin or muscles or bones. But it still hurt, deeper inside, even more than the words he''d spoken. Clark''s eyes immediately welled up with tears¡ªhe didn''t want to cry, since Lex already thought he was a baby, but maybe it didn''t matter.

    His brother didn''t like him anymore. They''d never have a snowball fight, or make snowmen or snow angels, or play basketball or checkers, or make cookies, or build blanket forts. And Lex would never hug him again, because he hated him, and he hit him, because Clark was a stupid baby . . .

    Clark sank down to the floor in his dad''s room, dissolving into sobs.

    He could hear his father''s voice speaking to Lex, deep and soft and scary: "Are you happy with your choices, son?"

    "P-please, I¡ªI didn''t hurt him. He has invulnerability, I couldn''t have hurt him."

    "Are you sure about that?"

    "Please don''t hurt me. I didn''t mean it. I''m sorry!"

    Clark didn''t look up, just kept crying into his hands.

    "Okay." His dad''s voice was a little louder. "To your rooms, both of you."

    Clark heard Lex''s footsteps heading out of the room and down the hall, and a moment later, he felt his father''s hand rubbing his back.

    "Up," his dad said. "I know you''re hurting, little guy, but you''re not innocent in all this."

    "H-h-he ha-aates-s me-e-e."

    "Your brother loves you more than anything in the world, son. Now go to your room."

    Clark pulled himself up, wiping at his face even though tears were still pouring from his eyes and his nose was starting to run. He went into his room and lay down on his side over the covers on his bed, crying quietly.

    A moment later, he heard Lex''s bedroom door open.

    Lex''s voice immediately pleaded: "I''m sorry, Jonathan, I''m sorry, I''m so sorry! You can hurt me all you want but please don''t send me away, please."

    Clark was used to Lex talking like that¡ªhe always freaked out when he was going to be punished, even worse than Clark did. Most days, it made Clark want to run to defend him, but not today. Lex wouldn''t want Clark to defend him, because Clark was a baby, and he couldn''t do anything anyway, and Lex didn''t like him.

    Clark could hear his dad speaking to Lex in that quiet, scary voice, but he couldn''t make out the words. Lex''s voice was louder.

    "I do, I swear, I''m sorry-y-y! Please!" Lex cried, and Lex broke down sobbing as Clark''s dad continued to speak quietly.

    Lex was really going to hate Clark now, because he''d gotten him into trouble. And then, after punishing Lex, his dad would come into Clark''s room to punish him, too.

    This was the worst day ever. He still couldn''t believe Lex had hit him. Hard!

    Clark buried his face deeper into his pillow, letting out a few more sobs. He tried to stop crying, but he couldn''t. Lex was right¡ªhe was a baby.

    His door swung open, and Clark expected to see his dad, but Lex stood in the doorway with a handful of tissues, his own eyes red and watery. He walked slowly over to Clark''s bedside and knelt down.

    Clark let go of his pillow and looked up. He flinched when Lex reached toward him, but Lex just began dabbing away his tears, gently holding the tissue beneath Clark''s left eye, then his right, then swiping over his cheeks. He set aside the tissues, and his hand wandered down to Clark''s stomach. "It didn''t hurt, did it?" he whispered, his fingers lightly touching the place where he''d struck.

    "It hurt my heart. Really bad."

    "I''m so sorry." Lex''s eyes became even shinier, and he blinked a few times.

    "Do you hate me?" Clark asked.

    "No, no." Lex brushed aside Clark''s hair and kissed him on the forehead. "Scoot back?"

    Clark scooted over a little on the bed, and Lex lay beside him and pulled him into his arms. Clark couldn''t help but let out a couple more sobs. His big brother gave the best hugs in the whole world, and Clark had thought he''d never get another one.

    "I''m really sorry," he said, running a hand through Clark''s hair. "Can you forgive me?"

    "Yeah," Clark sniffed again and buried his face in Lex''s warm, soft t-shirt. "But can you promise never to hit me again?"

    "I promise," Lex said.

    "I promise never to be annoying again," Clark said.

    "You can''t promise that. You''re my little brother. You''re annoying by definition."

    "Well, I''ll leave you alone when you have stupid teenager friends over. And I''ll let you have the remote sometimes."

    "We''re on restriction from TV until after Christmas. And we have extra chores."

    "Oh." Clark sighed. "Are we on restriction from snowball fights?"

    "No."

    "Can we have one tomorrow?"

    Lex pulled in Clark a little tighter. "Yeah."

    Clark snuggled in closer, curling up and gripping the front of Lex''s shirt with his hands. He didn''t care if it did make him seem like a baby. It felt so nice and safe. "Do you still love me?"

    "I love you so, so much." Lex''s voice cracked.

    "I love you too." Clark''s eyes fluttered closed.

    "I don''t deserve you, you know."

    Clark was going to ask what he meant, but he was so warm and comfortable, he fell asleep instead.

 Chapter 41: The Bully

    On the days when Martha had her classes at the community college, Lex was the one to pick up Clark from after-school day care. It was a short walk from his high school to Clark''s elementary school.

    Those days were Lex''s favorite.

    For one thing, the teacher was awesome. She always treated Lex like an adult when he went to get Clark, more so than Lex''s own teachers. For another, the other kids at Clark''s day care clearly didn''t judge Lex for his baldness. They were visibly jealous of Clark for having a cool older brother in high school. And another part of it was that none of Lex''s friends from school were around, so Lex didn''t feel the need to be casual about his affection for his little brother, either.

    But the biggest part was that Clark wasn''t old enough to feel the least bit embarrassed about showing how happy he was to see Lex, either. Lex would go to the front table where the teacher was, she would greet him and call Clark''s name, and Clark would look up from whatever he was doing¡ªplaying on the swings, or drawing, or building with legos¡ªand his whole face would light up in a grin.

    Lex would walk him home, and he wouldn''t make him hold hands to cross the street like Martha did, and Clark would practically skip beside him and jabber on about his latest spelling test, or about something he drew or made, or¡ªmost commonly¡ªabout Lana. And Lex would think about how somehow, despite the fact that it was still his fault he''d lost Julian, he''d still managed to have everything he wanted in life. And he''d tell himself that he had to be very, very careful, or he might lose this family, too. So he''d listen carefully to everything Clark said, keeping his hands in his pockets and his eyes on Clark as often he could spare them from the road, and he''d try not to think too hard about how little he deserved this, because he didn''t want to ruin these moments by tearing up.

    One day, though, Lex arrived to find everyone on the playground in a crowded circle, yelling and shouting. The teacher he knew wasn''t at her usual table; another teacher Lex didn''t recognize was trying to muscle his way into the crowd, and he assumed that''s where the other teacher was, too.

    Lex''s heart beat hard, eyes skimming the crowd for Clark. When he didn''t see him, he raced for the crowd, but arrived just in time for the kids to start disbanding.

    The teacher Lex had never seen had Clark by the arms, pulling him back; Clark''s face was bright red, and Lex could tell it was taking every ounce of restraint he had not to fight back. The teacher from the front table was standing in front of another kid Clark''s age, though a lot bigger than him. The kid''s nose was bleeding, and he was crying.

    Clark fighting was the last thing Lex had expected. He knew Clark had once shoved a bully through a door when he was really little, before Lex came to live with the Kents, but he also knew Jonathan had been pretty firm with him about making sure that kind of thing didn''t happen again. Clark could lose control of his strength and do a lot of damage. He could also expose his powers.

    Lex ran over to Clark. "What happened?" he asked, not even looking up at the teacher.

    "Is he yours?" The teacher kept his eyes on Clark, also.

    "I''m his brother." Adults who didn''t look closely at Lex sometimes mistook him for much older than he was.

    The teacher finally looked up at Lex. "Your parents are going to have to come pick him up."

    "His mom''s in class, his dad''s working on the farm and won''t pick up the phone if you call."

    The teacher''s brow furrowed¡ªit sometimes confused adults when Lex referred to Clark as his brother, but to Martha and Jonathan as Clark''s parents. This time, though, the teacher didn''t say anything about it. "Then you two are going to be waiting in the office for a little while."

    "Why?"

    "School policy. When there''s a physical fight with injuries¡ª"

    "Yeah, okay, fine," Lex said. Jonathan was going to be waiting for them to come home and help with chores. If they didn''t arrive at home at the usual time, his first step would probably be to call the school.

    The teacher gave him a very disapproving look, but he led them to the space just outside the office, where Clark and Lex sat on a bench and put their backpacks down at their feet.

    When they were alone, Lex asked Clark, "You wanna talk about it?"

    "No," Clark said, his jaw set.

    That was a first. "Well, Mom and Dad are going to make you."

    Clark sighed. "He''s been bullying my friends and teasing me. I figure now he won''t bother us anymore."

    Oh. That made perfect sense to him. He didn''t envy Clark in the slightest; with Clark''s powers, he would have done the same thing. He dealt with enough garbage from the bullies at his own school. "I think Dad''ll understand."

    Clark let out a short laugh. "You don''t know my dad as well as you think."

    "I know he''s usually fair."

    "He''s more scared of people finding out my secret than anything else. He''s going to kill me."

    "No, he won''t. Do you really think he''d expect you to just stand by and let your friends take the bullying?"

    Clark shrugged.

    "This kind of thing happened before, right? What did he do then?"

    "I don''t remember."

    "Then it couldn''t have been that bad, could it? And it won''t be that bad this time."

    "I was five, Lex, I didn''t know any better. I think he put me on a time out or something. Maybe gave me a hand slap."

    If Clark was being literal about the hand slap, it sounded pretty pointless to Lex. "Well, maybe I can talk to him."

    "Le-ex," Clark whined. "Please don''t. You''ll just make it worse."

    Lex highly doubted that. He was a lot better at making his case than Clark was. But if Clark wanted him to stay out of it, he could do that.

    A few minutes later, Jonathan''s truck pulled up in the parking lot. It was all too easy to read his face as he stormed up to the office. He grabbed Clark roughly by the arm and led him into the office; Lex followed close behind.

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    "I''m here," Jonathan announced to the lady at the front desk. "Can I take him?"

    She looked up from her computer at him. "Thank you for coming, Mr. Kent. We need to get you scheduled to attend a disciplinary meeting. Until you''ve had the meeting, Clark won''t be allowed to attend classes."

    "Understood. I''m available tomorrow morning, if that works."

    "I''ll get you set up. I''ve got the incident report drawn up, please sign here to acknowledge it?"

    Clark glanced back at Lex with a look that said, Told you so.

    Lex swallowed. He was still sure that as soon as Jonathan knew the full story, he would ease off.

    Jonathan''s knuckles were white as he gripped the steering wheel on the way home. Lex sat beside him in the passenger''s seat; Jonathan adjusted the rearview mirror so he could look at Clark when he wasn''t watching the road. "What happened, Clark?"

    "The guy kept bullying Pete and Greg and me."

    "So you beat him up? We''ve talked about this"

    Clark just looked down at his lap.

    "Did he hit you first?"

    "No, I hit him."

    "Did he hit anyone?"

    "No. He was just being really annoying."

    "Son, I am very disappointed in your behavior today."

    "I know," Clark whispered.

    "How many times have we talked about being careful with your powers? And keeping your secret?"

    A single tear streaked down Clark''s face, and Lex felt his stomach clenching from all sides. The only upside to Clark crying was that now Jonathan would ease off.

    "Well? Answer me!"

    Lex''s heart jumped into his throat. "Don''t you dare yell at him!"

    Jonathan looked over. "Lex¡ª"

    "He was just trying to defend his friends, can''t you see that?"

    "Alexander. This is not about you."

    "Yeah, well, it is now, because you''re bullying my little brother."

    "Son, I''m warning you¡ª"

    "He''s a hero, you know that? His powers make him a hero, and he protected his friends¡ª"

    Clark cut in, "Lex, stop! Dad, I didn''t mean to¡ª"

    "Silence. Both of you. I don''t want to hear another word until we get home."

    Clark burst into silent sobbing.

    Lex glared at Jonathan. "You''re unbelievable. Are you even hearing him?"

    "Keep talking, and it''s a week''s grounding for every word."

    Now Lex felt like beating someone up.

    It felt like an eternity before they pulled up to the house. A part of Lex had been looking forward to seeing Martha, thinking maybe she could fix this, and he''d forgotten that she was still at class and wouldn''t be back until it was time for her to make dinner.

    Regardless of anything else that was happening, there were chores to be done. The three of them worked silently, keeping a bit of distance from each other. Clark worked in silence, but every now and then, a tear traced its way down his face. Lex worked at triple the intensity he usually did, trying to keep his anger from boiling over. He should have known. Jonathan wasn''t any different from his own dad. If anything, he was worse, because he''d made Lex believe he was different. He didn''t listen; he didn''t care; he was just letting Clark suffer and cry, when Clark hadn''t even done anything wrong.

    When Martha did arrive at home, Jonathan told Clark and Lex to keep working outside while he went in to talk to her. Lex wanted to follow him in and make sure Martha got the full story, but he didn''t think he could risk any more direct disobedience, since Jonathan was in such a foul mood.

    She was the one who came to get them in the barn. Her voice was gentle as she said, "Clark, go meet your father in your room. Lex, sweetie, stay with me for a minute."

    Clark walked toward the house, but Lex gave Martha a look and followed him, calling back. "I''m not letting Clark go face Jonathan alone."

    "I want to talk to you," Martha said. "We can talk in the house if you want. Then you''ll be able to hear if something bad is happening upstairs."

    Lex wasn''t sure how that would help. He wasn''t afraid for Clark''s physical safety. But he quickly realized she wasn''t going to negotiate further.

    They walked together into the house, and Clark made his way up the stairs while Martha came to stand across from Lex in the kitchen. "Lex, there are parts of this story you don''t know."

    "Jonathan''s not even listening."

    "We pay more attention than you think. We''ve been hearing about this bully for weeks."

    "And you haven''t done anything?"

    "We''ve done a lot. The boy who''s been giving Clark and his friends trouble had two deaths in his family this year, including his father."

    Lex couldn''t muster up a lot of sympathy for someone who had bullied his little brother.

    "There''s been progress, and none of Clark''s friends have been hurt."

    "You were the ones who taught me that words can hurt as much as fists."

    Martha took a deep breath. "You''re right. But words can also heal. Fists can''t. And we''ve been talking to Clark about how to handle these situations and reminding him that violence isn''t the answer."

    "If that kid was bothering Clark, he deserved a bloody nose."

    "Clark could have killed the boy with one punch. He didn''t deserve to die."

    Lex hadn''t really thought about it that way. He didn''t want to agree with her; he didn''t want to say he understood or that he''d been wrong. But he was breathing in to say something, when he heard a loud sob from upstairs. His voice caught. "I''m not letting him do this." He began to march toward the stairs.

    Martha ran after him, grabbing his arm. "Lex, stop¡ª"

    Lex whirled around and yelled, "Clark wasn''t trying to hurt anyone! He didn''t mean to! He was trying to protect his friends, and you¡ª" Lex''s breath hitched. "It''s not his fault he has powers."

    "I know."

    "Jonathan has to listen to him, he has to . . . he can''t . . ."

    "What do you think is going to happen, sweetie?"

    Lex''s voice caught. A little voice in his head reminded him of all of the times he''d gotten in trouble with the Kents; it had never, ever turned out all too badly. But . . . "He''s crying so hard."

    "Why do you think he''s crying?"

    Lex wanted to say it was because he was scared, but that just didn''t quite ring true. But if it wasn''t fear, he really had no idea.

    "He feels guilty, honey. He knows he shouldn''t have hit that kid."

    "But¡ª"

    "If he didn''t think he did anything wrong, he would stand up for himself. He''s young, but he''s not helpless."

    Lex didn''t know if he could believe that. It wasn''t how Lex himself dealt with things. Maybe Clark was just different. "What''s Jonathan going to do?"

    "What''s the worst thing he''s ever done to you?"

    " . . . Grounded me for two weeks."

    "Well, Clark is about half your age. I think a week is the worst he would give him."

    Lex paced his breathing, like his therapist had taught him to do. Martha was right, of course¡ªhe didn''t have to be afraid of what Jonathan would do to Clark, not really¡ªbut even a harsh word felt like too much when Clark had been trying to do the best he could about the situation. "It''s not fair," he said.

    "If Clark thinks it''s unfair, he''ll say so."

    Lex didn''t know what to say about that, but he didn''t get a chance to speak. Jonathan came down the stairs at that point. He went first to Martha and told her, "He''s going to help me with extra chores for as long as he''s suspended, after he finishes writing an apology note."

    "That sounds reasonable," Martha said.

    Jonathan turned then to Lex, putting a hand on his shoulder. "Son, I''m going to tell you the same thing I told Clark."

    Lex braced himself for the worst, even though he had no idea what Jonathan was about to say.

    "I''m very, very proud of you. When you care about someone, you care very deeply, and you do everything you can to protect them."

    Whatever Lex was expecting, it wasn''t that. His throat choked up.

    "But there''s a right and wrong way to protect someone. You know that, don''t you?"

    "I know," Lex said, and now he felt like crying.

    "Son, I need to apologize to you."

    Lex blinked. An adult was apologizing to him? His father had never, ever apologized. His mother hadn''t, either, except sometimes for his father''s behavior.

    "I lost my temper with you in the car, and I didn''t help things. I should have done better. Can you forgive me?"

    "I¡ªyes." How could Lex have said no?

    "Thank you, son."

    "I''m sorry, too."

    "And you are forgiven. As you always will be."

    Lex almost smiled.

    "I want to talk more about the best way to protect someone, but right now, I think you should go see your brother."

    "Really?"

    "Go."

    Lex didn''t have to be told again. He took the stairs two at a time and threw open the door to Clark''s room.

    Clark''s eyes were red and puffy, but he wasn''t crying anymore. He was sitting up in bed reading a book. "Hey," he said, setting the book aside.

    "You okay?"

    "Yeah. I was just being stupid at school."

    "It''s not stupid to stop a bully."

    "I could have made things worse. I knew that when I hit him, Lex, it was just a bad choice. That''s what Dad said, anyway."

    "And you agree with him?"

    Clark shrugged, sniffling. "I mean, he''s right."

    "And you''re sure you''re okay?"

    "I''m just mad at myself."

    Lex nodded slowly. He could have trusted Jonathan. "I''m going to go talk to Dad."

    "You should. I always feel better after."

    Lex pulled Clark into a quick hug, and he went back down the stairs. Somehow, despite everything, he felt safe.

 Chapter 42: County Fair

    Before Lex had come to live with the Kents, he''d been on quite a few vacations. He''d been to half the theme parks in the country, and he''d seen more countries than he could count. One of very, very few downsides to living with the Kents was that they really didn''t travel at all. As much as he enjoyed staying at home, and as much as it had sometimes been frustrating to move around so much, he sometimes missed traveling.

    But he thought the county fair kind of made up for it.

    The county fair ran for a month that went through a couple of weeks in June and a couple in July. The Kents always had to be there to sell produce at the farmer''s market in the fair¡ªthey''d missed the summer before because of Lex''s adoption, but they went most years¡ªand they brought in a few of their more impressive animals. But they didn''t make Clark and Lex help out the entire time; the kids were free for much of the day to wander around the fair, as long as they promised to stay together.

    It was big and crowded, but the people were really friendly on the whole. The concerts weren''t anywhere near as good as others he had seen, in terms of musical quality, but they were much, much better in that everyone was there to have fun rather than to be critics. Martha made better food at home, but the fair had more food, and more junk food than they were usually allowed. No one was around to limit them, and several of the food booths were family friends who would give Clark and Lex free samples whenever they came around. Lex assumed they wouldn''t be able to afford the rides, but one of Jonathan''s friends gave both Clark and Lex wristbands that lasted the season, and he didn''t charge them.

    And unlike at school, no one treated Lex like he was weird or didn''t belong.

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    It was the first day of the third week of the fair, and today was the best day. Because the roller coaster was finally open!

    They''d started setting it up on the first day, but there had been some technical difficulties. And now it was ready.

    Clark''s dad had checked and double checked at home. Clark was four feet tall, just tall enough to ride. His parents were going to be busy with the produce, but they said Lex could take him to ride it after they helped their parents load in for the day.

    Once everything was loaded in, Clark was almost bouncing on his toes, wanting to run over to the ride. But his mom kept Lex back for a minute. "It''s a busier day today," she said. "You''re going to have to keep a close eye on him."

    "Yes, ma''am."

    "You don''t split up. If you have to hold hands going through the crowds¡ª"

    "I know, Martha, I promise I''ll take care of him."

    "I know you will, I just don''t want him getting lost."

    "You can trust me."

    She kissed each of them on the forehead. "I know I can, sweetie." She looked down at Clark. "Have fun. And if it''s too scary, you don''t have to go."

    He gave her a funny look. There was no way he was going to get too scared to go on that ride. He''d been looking forward to it for two whole weeks!

    They took off then. Clark ran a little faster than Lex did, but he could hear Lex keeping up behind him. They had to get there before there was too much of a line.

    It looked amazing. It was bright red and blue, it went up really high before dropping down super fast, and it even had an upside down part. And the crowds were starting to pick up, but they were just early enough that there was only a short line!

    The attendant ushered Lex inside immediately, but he stopped Clark. "Sorry, son, you have to be at least this tall."

    Clark looked up at the measuring stick. It was just above his head. "But . . . I am tall enough!"

    Lex cleared his throat. "Sir, we measured him at home. He''s exactly four feet tall. I think your measuring stick is off."

    "This is the one they gave me, and it''s the one I have to use. It''s for his own safety." He smiled sadly at Clark. "Next year, kid."

    Clark felt like his heart was sinking into his stomach. He wanted to cry. He had been so excited!

    Lex gently took his hand and led him away from the ride, into the crowds. "It''s okay, Clark, it''s probably not that great anyway."

    "Yes it is! And it''s not fair, I''m tall enough! Besides, I won''t get hurt!"

    "I know, but I''m not going to be able to convince him. Maybe later, we can get Dad to talk to the guy."

    Clark sniffled. He doubted his dad was going to be able to convince the guy, either.

    "Hey, you want churros for breakfast?"

    "No."

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    "You want to ride the ferris wheel?"

    "Maybe later."

    "Want to see the horses?"

    "I dunno . . ." Clark didn''t feel like doing anything now. His whole day was ruined. The whole summer, probably. Maybe even his whole life.

    "Well, let''s go back to Mom and Dad. They''ll know what to do."

    Clark nodded, and he tried to follow Lex back, but his legs didn''t want to move fast anymore, and the whole crowd was blurry because of the tears in his eyes. Soon, he fell behind.

    He called, "Lex?" but his voice was all choked up, and he wasn''t anywhere loud enough to be heard over the crowds of people. He took a few steps forward, and then turned, then turned again. Soon, he was completely turned around. He couldn''t remember his way back to his parents'' booth, either; this was his first time at the section of the fair that had the roller coaster.

    He ran in one direction, then another. His eyes filled with tears even worse than before, and he was having a hard time seeing his way around.

    He was completely lost.

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    Lex turned around to take Clark''s hand, remembering what Martha had said about walking through crowds, but Clark wasn''t there.

    He ran back toward the roller coaster¡ªmaybe Clark had gone back to try to talk to the guy. But he wasn''t there.

    He went to the bathrooms. The churro stand. The ferris wheel. The stables. Clark just wasn''t anywhere. His heart sped up so fast it was hurting his chest, and his breathing felt like it was stopped completely.

    Finally, he did what he really, really didn''t want to do. He went back to the Kents'' produce stand.

    He forced himself to take a deep breath when they were in view. This was it. He''d messed up before, but he''d never messed up this badly. He''d lost their son. Their real son. He''d always known all of this was too good to be true, that eventually he''d mess up and lose it all. He''d always been very, very careful not to force that day to come. But now it had, and there was nothing he could do about it.

    His eyes watered, and his legs shook as he approached the stand.

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    Martha didn''t have to ask Lex what had happened. It was clear as day from the look on his face. Her sons hadn''t taken her advice to hold hands while walking through the crowds, and now they''d gotten separated.

    But as she watched the look on his face, the blood having drained away and eyes teary, she knew she''d gone the wrong direction that morning. Clark tended to get very scared when he was lost in a crowd, so she wanted to avoid it if at all possible, but there wasn''t any real danger to him. Half the people who were working at the fair were family friends of the Kents. As soon as someone saw Clark looking panicked and took him over to the nearest booth for help, he''d be fine.

    Lex, on the other hand, was not fine.

    Martha alerted Jonathan right away. "Honey, looks like Clark got lost. Can you go find him? I''m going to talk to Lex."

    "Didn''t you tell them to stay together?" Jonathan asked, without looking up from the bag of produce he was putting together.

    "I think they tried. Lex looks like the world is ending."

    Jonathan sighed. "I''ll go find the little guy."

    "See you in a bit."

    Jonathan left the stand, and Martha gave a nod to their assistant, while she herself went to meet Lex a little ways before he reached the stand. He was shaking, terror in his eyes.

    She put a gentle hand on his back, and he flinched. "I¡ªI''m so sorry, Mrs. Kent, I tried to watch him¡ª"

    "It''s okay, sweetie, come here."

    He looked every bit like a man walking to the gallows as she led him into the storage tent.

    As soon as they were alone, tears filled his eyes. "I don''t¡ªI can''t fix this."

    "Jonathan is going to find your brother."

    "He''s not my brother anymore. I lost him. Just like . . ." He began to hyperventilate.

    She lightly tapped the side of his head with two fingers. "Hey. Hey. Look at me."

    Lex''s eyes moved towards her, though she felt like he was looking through her. She tapped his temple, just a bit more firmly, and his eyes focused.

    "He''s going to be fine. It was crowded out there, there was nothing you could do. It could have happened to anyone. I wouldn''t have sent you out alone with him if I thought he would be permanently lost just because you two were separated for a minute."

    "S-so you''re not mad at me?"

    "Of course not." She looked him deeper in the eyes and said firmly, "You''re a great big brother."

    He nodded, holding back his tears even as his shoulders hitched.

    She pulled him into her arms and whispered, "It''s okay, it''s okay. I''ve got you." She held onto him for as long as it took for the shaking to stop, and she kissed the side of his head before letting go.

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    Jonathan found Clark curled up beside a hot dog stand, face buried in his knees. It wasn''t hard to predict that that was where he would be. The summer before last, that was where he''d always gone, the three times he''d gotten lost.

    "Son." Jonathan put a hand on Clark''s head. Clark jumped up and leapt into his arms. Jonathan easily picked him up. "You gave Lex a bit of a scare, kiddo."

    "Sorry, Dad."

    "I know." He rubbed the boy''s back and let go, setting him down and walking beside him as they headed back to the produce stand. "What happened?"

    "We were coming back to you, and we got lost in the crowd."

    "How was the roller coaster?"

    Clark sniffed. "We didn''t get to go on it. The guy said I was too short, even though I know I''m not."

    Jonathan frowned. He''d have to talk to them about that. His measuring stick had actually read Clark to be a little taller than four feet.

    The assistant was running the produce stand when they returned. Jonathan opened the flap to the storage tent, and Clark ran inside and into Lex''s arms. Lex clung onto him so tightly that Jonathan would have told him to ease off, if Clark hadn''t had powers. He almost told Clark to ease off, since he was pretty sure he heard something pop in Lex''s back, but Lex didn''t seem to mind in the least.

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    When Lex was finally able to calm down, Jonathan walked the two of them over to the roller coaster. He had a short talk with the guy at the front, and the man allowed both of them to get onto the ride. Lex had never seen Clark grin as widely as he did as the lap belt was lowered into place.

    It was awful.

    Lex had been on good roller coasters before. This one jerked around too hard, and it felt rickety, like it wasn''t going to hold together. It was scary in the wrong way. He was sure it was safe, if Jonathan was okay with them riding it, but it felt terrible to ride.

    Still, Lex forced a smile as they got off the ride. If Clark liked it, Lex was going to ride it as many times as he had to.

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    Clark felt dizzy as he stepped off the ride. He''d gripped onto the lap bar so hard, there were little dents in it from his fingers.

    Mom had been right. That ride was way too scary. But there was no way he was going to admit that to Lex.

    "That was fun, right?" Lex said.

    "Yeah!" Clark said.

    "Do you want to go again?"

    He took a deep breath. He had to go, for his brother. "Okay! Maybe after lunch?"

    "Awesome," Lex said, though for some reason, he didn''t really smile.

 Chapter 43: Migraine

    The first weekend after school started, Martha woke up on Saturday morning to the sound of the lawn mower running outside. She tried getting back to sleep, but a glance at the digital clock on her night stand told her she''d slept in a little later than she''d intended¡ªthe start of school had been exhausting. It was a lot of work getting both boys where they needed to be and helping Jonathan pick up the slack in terms of chores the boys couldn''t do now that they had homework. She put on her dressing robe, left her room, and looked out of the window to see who was up and running the lawn mower.

    What she saw made her smile.

    The cows on the farm accounted for most of the grass, but Jonathan had cleared a little lawn area for Clark to play without having to worry about stepping in waste. Unfortunately, that meant the lawn actually had to be mowed. Clark could easily work the lawnmower, but he was overzealous and usually managed to cut too much. Jonathan had given the chore to Lex; Lex usually had to be reminded multiple times to start it, though. Today, though, he''d gotten up early and started his chore.

    He was working really hard at it, too. Often he dragged his feet. Today his head was held high¡ªstrangely, he faced directly toward the sun¡ªand he was putting all of his muscle into the chore.

    Then he let go of the lawn mower, dropped to his hands and knees, and started vomiting.

    Martha gasped and ran out of the house and toward him. By the time she reached him, he was back on his feet, pushing the lawn mower again. "Sweetheart," she said, "what are you doing?"

    "Mowing the lawn," he shouted over the mower. "You said it was my chore." He seemed to be having a very, very hard time keeping a straight face. His voice was strained, as though he were in terrible pain.

    She turned it off. "Lex, I just saw you throwing up. Are you sick?"

    "No, no. I have a migraine."

    "A¡ªa migraine?" She wondered if he knew what that word even meant. Migraines were supposed to leave a person very, very sensitive to bright light and loud noises.

    "Yeah. This is how you get rid of them, right? Working really hard in bright light, with a lot of noise?" He turned back toward the sun, squinting and wincing.

    "Who taught you that?"

    "My . . . birth father."

    "Lex . . ." She shook her head. He had to be in agony. "Doesn''t it hurt?"

    "That''s . . . that''s how you know it''s working . . ." He frowned. "How do you get rid of them?"

    Her eyes prickled. "Come here." She wrapped an arm around him and started walking toward the house. "Stop looking at the sun. Go on up to your room."

    Quietly, he obeyed her, his hand going to the side of his head to rub at his temple.

    Martha sighed as she headed into the house. She stopped in the kitchen to fill a glass with water, then she followed him up to his room.

    She handed Lex the glass of water, instructing him to drink slowly, then she undid the curtain hangings over his window and stretched them out to completely block out the light. It was mostly quiet, but she could just make out the little noises of Clark playing with his toys in the next room. "I''ll be right back."

    She went over to Clark''s room and poked her head inside. "Hey, Clark, can you go play outside for me?"

    "Why?"

    "Because you need to get some fresh air."

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    "Okay. Can Lex come play with me?"

    "Not today, baby. He''s not feeling well."

    Clark frowned. "Can I give him a hug?"

    "He just has a headache." No need to try to explain migraines to Clark right now; it could wait. "I''ll come out and play with you in a few, okay?"

    Clark sighed heavily. "Okayy," he said, and he trotted out of his room and disappeared down the stairs.

    Martha smiled and went back into Lex''s room, where he was finishing up the glass of water. "Is it sensitive to touch?" she asked.

    "Uh . . ."

    She stepped forward and gently put her fingers on his temple. "Does that hurt?"

    "I mean, yeah it hurts, but you touching it doesn''t make it hurt more."

    She took her hands away. "How bad is it?"

    "It''s like there''s a clamp over my whole head and it keeps tightening. And like needles in the back of my eye."

    "Was it this bad when you woke up?"

    "Almost. It was worse when I was outside, though."

    She nodded. "Lie down, sweetheart."

    "I can''t, I have chores to do¡ª"

    "No, you don''t. You''re not well."

    "But my dad always said it won''t get better if I don''t¡ª"

    "He lied to you, Lex."

    Lex breathed in as if to speak, then he deflated. "Oh." Then he winced and put a hand on his head. "Man, it really hurts."

    She pulled him into one last very, very gentle hug. "I''m so sorry. Lie down. Sleep, if you can."

    He obeyed, crawling into his bed on top of the covers.

    "And we''re going to talk more about this when you wake up," she said.

    "Okay."

    She left him then, carefully closing the door behind herself, as silently as she could. Only then did she allow the tears in her eyes to spill.

    <hr noshade="noshade" size="1">

    Martha was outside playing with Clark when Lex came out to meet her, a few hours later. He''d slept straight through breakfast and lunch. She passed the basketball to Clark and went over to Lex. "How are you feeling?"

    "It''s gone, mostly. I''m hungry."

    "I''m sure you are. There''s leftover chicken salad from lunch."

    He nodded, and she took him back into the house to get him something to eat.

    Once he was halfway through his lunch, she came to sit across from him. "Sweetheart¡ª"

    "I know what you''re going to say."

    "I don''t think you do."

    "You think my father didn''t teach me how to do basic stuff. Like deal with migraines."

    "Why do you think he lied to you?"

    "Probably to make me stronger. I used to whine a lot." He set his jaw. "But I know how to take care of myself. I was just mixed up about the migraine thing."

    "I was just thinking¡ª"

    "You can quiz me if you don''t believe me."

    "Oh really?" She raised her eyebrows. "Okay. What do you do if you have a cold?"

    "Uh . . . I don''t really get colds, not since the meteor shower."

    "But if you did?"

    "Lock yourself in your room so you don''t spread it to anyone else."

    She frowned¡ªit was close. "Scraped knee?"

    "Pour alcohol on it to kill the germs, dry it off, and put on a bandage." His brow furrowed. "Ah, actually, you use an antiseptic wipe for me. It stings less."

    She nodded slowly. "Nausea?"

    "Um. Suck it up and don''t eat anything for awhile? Oh, and if you throw up, make sure to get to the toilet. I . . . I''m sorry about your lawn."

    "I''m not worried about the lawn, Lex." She thought for a moment. "How about a bug bite?"

    "Don''t scratch it."

    "Toothache?"

    "Brush better?"

    "Twisted ankle?"

    "Limit your time on it, but don''t limp."

    She crossed her arms. "How about if someone''s bullying you at school?"

    "Don''t snitch. Maybe do something smart about it."

    "Like what?"

    "Like, find out their secrets and threaten to tell people?"

    Martha took a deep breath. She couldn''t even just tell him to forget everything he''d ever learned¡ªsome of it was right, even if there were important pieces missing. "New house rule, sweetheart."

    His eyes came dangerously close to rolling back. "What?"

    "You tell me everything. Every cut and bruise, every ache and pain."

    "For how long?"

    "At least for the next couple of years." He was only in eighth grade; she figured she could sort out a lot of his misconceptions by his sophomore years of high school.

    "Everything?"

    "Yes. Because you have no idea how to take care of yourself."

    His jaw pulsed. "You don''t even know. I''ve been taking care of myself since I was Clark''s age."

    "This is not a negotiation." She gave him her best mom-look.

    He glared at her.

    "Hey. I''m not doing this to torture you. I''m trying to take care of you."

    "I don''t need help."

    "Yeah? How''s your migraine?" she asked.

    He brought a hand to his head. The relief was clear in his eyes, even though he was obviously trying not to show it, for the sake of his pride.

    "How is it?" she asked again.

    "Gone now," he said under his breath.

    "What''s that?" She made a show of putting a hand up to her ear. "I didn''t hear you."

    "It''s gone." He cracked a smile, though he seemed to be trying to hold it back.

    "That''s what I thought." She gave his shoulder a playful shake.

    His smile was a little wider now. "Should I do my morning chores?"

    "Clark and Jonathan took care of them. Go play with your little brother."

    He nodded, and stood to bring his plate to the sink before heading outside. As she watched him go, she caught him grinning.

 Chapter 44: The Runaway

    Lex lay back on his bed. His cheek still stung where Martha had applied the antiseptic, even though it had been almost twenty minutes since she had left his room. She''d patched up his wounds and left him to wait for Jonathan, who was still cooling down. For all the anger in her eyes, Lex had expected Martha to tend to him roughly, but her hands had been as gentle as ever, even as her eyes pierced him with daggers.

    Lex supposed it didn''t help that he''d thrown the first punch.

    The guy had it coming. Jonathan and Martha didn''t have to freak out about it so much. But he also couldn''t be surprised by their reaction. He knew exactly how they felt about fighting. They''d always been firmer with Clark about it, because Clark could accidentally kill someone with an uncontrolled punch, but they made their position on violence abundantly clear to both of their kids. Lex was absolutely in for it.

    He was going in for a disciplinary hearing at the school tomorrow, but they''d probably just guilt him and suspend him. He wasn''t sure exactly what Jonathan was going to do. If he''d still been living with Lionel, he could imagine the bastard coming up with some vicious and creative punishments for him. By some cruel twist of fate, Lex was sure Jonathan''s anger and disappointment hurt more than any of them. Lex would have given anything to go back and make a different choice, but he doubted he would have been able to stop himself. The guy he''d fought with was a jerk. He''d strung up some freshman kid in a field, just like Lex had been strung up when he was fourteen.

    But Martha and Jonathan were just going to tell him that violence didn''t solve anything. And it hadn''t. Lex had thrown the first punch and drawn blood, but he''d ultimately lost the fight. There had been a lot for Martha to patch up.

    In the time Lex had lived with the Kents, he''d tried hard not to be too much trouble. He''d forgotten chores; he''d mouthed off to Martha; he''d fought with Clark. But those had all been small things; he''d been able to quickly apologize and make things right. The worse thing he''d done was breaking curfew, though only by twenty minutes, and only once.

    He swallowed hard¡ªcoming home twenty minutes after curfew had earned him two weeks'' grounding, and this was so, so much worse than that. Lex had never done anything nearly this bad.

    Jonathan hadn''t spoken a word while driving Lex home, his face red with anger. He''d been kind of rough with Lex, too, gripping his arm too tightly as he walked out to the truck from the office, fast enough that Lex had to trot to keep up. Jonathan had never once struck him in the time he''d lived with them, but he couldn''t help worry that this might call for an exception. Lex could take pain, no problem, but he wasn''t sure he could take Jonathan dishing it out.

    Lex tried to see the situation from Jonathan''s perspective. Jonathan was always telling Lex that, as Clark''s older brother, Lex had to set a good example for him. If Clark saw Lex as a role model, and Lex was fighting kids at school, Clark might start fighting kids at school, too. Except Clark could actually kill someone. If Lex were Jonathan, he''d be thinking about ways to set an example, all right. Ways to make an example out of Lex, so that Clark didn''t get any ideas.

    Lex realized his heart was racing. He couldn''t wait this out any longer. Those two weeks of being grounded, with Martha and Jonathan giving him their disappointed looks all the time, had already been more than he could take. Of course, the worst part was the end of the two weeks, when they''d released him from his grounding. They''d reiterated to him how much they loved him and worried about him, and how he needed to set a good example for Clark and be a role model in the community as both a Luthor and a member of the Kent family, and how they were expecting him to do better in the future. How they had total faith he could do better, because he was their son, and he was an amazing young man . . .

    Lex had been through abuse bordering on torture before, but he''d never experienced that kind of pain before. It had forced the tears from his eyes, made him feel so vulnerable and humble and undeserving. He''d had to listen to the whole thing, knowing all the while that he would mess up and disappoint them all over again. He was a Luthor. It was what he did.

    And this? This was going to be so much worse. The punishment was going to be bad enough¡ªJonathan dragging him by the arm had hurt¡ªbut by the end of it, when he was most convinced he deserved all of it and worse, they''d forgive him and tell him all about how much they loved him and believed in him.

    . . . Or would this be the time they finally learned what had always been true? Would they kick him out? Would they do something worse than kicking him out?

    Whatever it was, he couldn''t take it. He couldn''t.

    He had to run. If they''d been planning to kick him out anyway, might as well get a head start.

    Lex''s heart rate spiked even faster, and he felt like he was going to throw up. He didn''t think he could get out of the house without being seen if he went down the stairs, but he was pretty sure he could climb down the side of the house. There was a drain pipe and a few other places to hold on.

    He didn''t know where he would go, exactly, but he knew he couldn''t stay here. He was sixteen now, though, and he looked older than he was, and the Luthor name had been out of the news for awhile¡ªhe probably wouldn''t be recognized. He might be able to find some work somewhere, if it came down to it. He had a little cash saved up, which he grabbed from his sock drawer and shoved into his pockets; he could get a bus ticket out of the town, maybe even out of the state.

    Climbing down the side of the building was a lot harder than it looked, but he was able to make it to the ground. As soon as he was down, Lex began to run. He glanced around himself a couple of times to make sure he wasn''t being watched, but Clark was out at Pete''s house, and Martha and Jonathan were in their own room, absorbed in discussing what they were going to do about Lex''s misbehavior. He had to be long out of sight before they came to his bedroom and noticed he was gone.

    Running fast was no problem. His heart was still just about ready to pound its way out of his chest.

    He must have been a quarter mile away from the house when it occurred to him that he should have at least grabbed a change of clothes; he was going to be awfully sweaty from running. He also wouldn''t be able to take any of the local buses. Hazards of a small town¡ªeveryone knew the Kents.

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    And how was he supposed to get a job? He didn''t have an ID, or a driver''s license. He was going to be homeless.

    What had he been thinking, running away? He hadn''t thought; he''d just run. He''d just been scared, and he''d reacted instead of thinking.

    Well, now he really couldn''t go back. He''d have to find a way to survive on his own. Homelessness probably wasn''t better than what the Kents would have done to him for getting into that fight, but now that he''d also run away, he had no choice but to suck it up.

    . . . No, homelessness was still definitely worse. But it was probably what he deserved for betraying them.

    Really, though, the knowledge that he''d been such a disappointment was the worst part of all. What right did they have to add to that?

    <hr>

    Bus ticket prices had gone up. The money he had saved was only enough to get him a couple of cities over. He''d gotten off the bus in Granville and wandered awkwardly at the bus stop for a little while before turning his attention to the streets, looking for dropped coins. Over the course of the day, he managed to collect ninety four cents.

    He knew this was stupid. This wasn''t going to get him anywhere. But he had no idea what else to do, and he still felt nauseous every time he considered going back to the Kents.

    Eventually, the sky went dark, and Lex realized he needed to either find a place to sleep or find a way to get home. He found a park bench in a deserted grassy area and settled down. The bench was even colder than the night air, but Lex at least had his coat on. He didn''t want a repeat of the hypothermia from his freshman year, but that had been a much colder night, and he''d been almost naked.

    Maybe they''d find him here. But if nothing else, they''d have had some time to cool down. That was, if they weren''t even angrier with him for running away . . .

    Lex tossed and turned on the park bench. There was nothing he could do about it tonight; he was out of money. His best bet was to try to sleep and figure out this mess in the morning.

    <hr>

    He woke in the middle of the night to a firm tap on his shoulder.

    Lex sat up straight. Between a couple of street lamps and the moonlight, he could easily make out Clark''s figure standing in front of him, his face twisted with absolute rage, hands curled into fists.

    "What are you doing, Lex?" Clark reared back for a punch.

    Lex barely had time to cringe, let alone dodge¡ªClark''s punches could really hurt¡ªbut when the hit landed on his shoulder, it didn''t hurt at all. Clark geared back for another. "Whoa, hey!" Lex cried.

    Clark landed two more light hits. "Why did you run?"

    "I''m sorry!"

    "You should be!" He threw yet another punch.

    Lex flinched at each one, but he felt no pain. Clark was coiling his little fist back as far as he could and throwing it at Lex with great speed, but landing it at the surface of Lex''s skin with such a light touch, Lex could barely feel it. The extent of his younger brother''s control over his anger, and his total misjudgment of strength, made Lex want to laugh. The fiery pain in Clark''s eyes made him want to cry.

    "Mom was so worried!" Clark threw another punch that barely touched Lex, and his bright blue eyes watered. "I thought you were dead! Because why else would you be just gone?"

    "I''m sorry, okay? Just¡ª"

    "Why did you leave?"

    "Because . . . your dad was mad at me for fighting. I thought he might kick me out anyway." Or worse.

    Clark''s jaw dropped. "Really? That''s why?"

    "I''m supposed to set an example for you, you know?"

    "You''re so stupid!" Clark landed a rapid fire series of punches to Lex''s chest. All Lex felt was a little gust of air with each one, followed by the lightest touch. He wanted to try to block Clark, but he wasn''t sure if Clark''s fists would slow in time to avoid hitting his hands, and he didn''t really want a broken wrist. So he held still while Clark doled out the punches. "They love you!"

    "Well, maybe they shouldn''t! I used violence, and now, look, you''re hitting me."

    Clark stopped abruptly. "I''m sorry," he muttered.

    Lex shook his head. "I''m not mad at you. You . . . look up to me, that''s what your mom says."

    "So how did you think I''d feel when you ran away?" Clark''s voice broke, and a tear streaked down his cheek.

    Lex''s breath caught. He knew he''d been acting stupid, some part of him knew all along, but he hadn''t realized how stupid he''d been being. Of course the Kents wouldn''t kick Lex out. Clark would have been absolutely devastated. "Come here," Lex said.

    Clark climbed onto his lap on the bench, wrapping his arms around Lex''s waist. Lex held him tightly to his chest; it was freezing out, and Clark was warm. Clark shook a bit, though with anger or sadness, Lex wasn''t sure.

    "Did you even think about me when you ran away?" Clark''s voice broke. "Were you even going to miss me?"

    Terrible guilt weighed on him, heavier than anything he''d even felt the day before. He''d been so focused on his own fear, he hadn''t even thought about how he was leaving his little brother behind. "I''m so sorry, Clark. I was just thinking about how mad your mom and dad were going to be."

    "They weren''t even really that mad about the fight when they found you missing, you know."

    "Really?"

    "Yeah. I guess they called the school for more information and got ahold of the other guy''s parents. I can''t believe you took on the football captain!"

    "He played that scarecrow prank on my friend''s younger brother."

    "I know, that''s why Dad and Mom weren''t that mad."

    "I wasn''t even in trouble?"

    "Well, probably some trouble. But not as bad as you''re gonna be now!" Clark coiled his fist back again, but he dropped it before landing a punch. "Sorry," he said softly.

    Lex swallowed hard. "How did you find me?"

    "I ran around everywhere looking."

    "I''m two towns over."

    "I run fast."

    Lex pulled his little brother closer to his chest. "I''m so sorry."

    Clark rested his cheek on Lex''s shoulder. "Not yet, you''re not. They''re gonna ground you ''til you die."

    "I know. I don''t care."

    "It''s gonna suck."

    "Yeah, but you''re gonna be there."

    Fear had blinded him. Martha and Jonathan could do anything they wanted to him¡ªit shouldn''t have made him run. They could lose faith in him, or they could hold onto it even as Lex continued to disappoint them. They could ground him for as long as they wanted, or make him do extra farm chores until his arms fell off. They''d never beat him or starve him or humiliate him, but even if they did, Lex should never, ever have run without thinking about his brother.

    "You left me," Clark said softly.

    It might as well have been a knife in his chest. "I''m so, so sorry." Lex wrapped his arms tighter around Clark.

    Clark squeezed him tighter, too. "I would never leave you."

    Lex was pretty sure Jonathan''s lecture wasn''t going to hurt as much as this one. "Tell you what. For as long as I''m grounded, I have to play with you for an extra hour every day."

    "Two hours," Clark said.

    "I might not have time, after all the extra chores."

    Clark looked up at him with wide, blue, watery eyes.

    Lex sighed. "Two hours," he said. He''d just have to do his homework after Clark went to bed.

    "Deal." Clark sat up and pulled away, standing from the bench. "We should go. Mom gave me some money for a bus ticket back."

    Something didn''t add up. "Mom sent you to run all over Kansas looking for me?"

    "Well . . . no . . ."

    Lex raised his eyebrows. "You stole the money."

    Clark shrugged. "This way, we''ll be grounded together. So you don''t have to do it alone."

    Lex''s voice caught. He wasn''t sure whether to laugh at that one. "I don''t know what I''d do without you, Clark."

    "Yeah, well, you should remember that next time you think you might want to run away."

    "I will." Lex pulled himself up from the park bench, and they both began to walk toward the bus stop. It was time to face the music.

    And that was okay.

 Chapter 45: Christmas Tree

    The smell of evergreen was thick in the air, and the light wind had an icy chill to it. The perfect December afternoon.

    Martha had double checked before leaving the house that both of her sons had their scarves, thick sweaters, and extra-thick hats before they headed out¡ªespecially Lex, since Clark seemed to be invulnerable to cold, along with everything else¡ªbut the boys didn''t seem to mind the cold at all. If anything, it had given them new energy. As soon as they''d arrived, Clark had suggested hide and seek, and they''d both run off.

    The tree lot wasn''t busy. It helped that they''d opted to go right after breakfast on a weekday; most people would be at work, but Jonathan and the boys had gotten up extra early to get chores done, freeing up a few hours to come here.

    Martha snuggled up a little closer to Jonathan, her eyes scanning the lot. She didn''t have to worry about the boys getting lost, but she did sometimes worry about Clark remembering to be careful with his powers. It was difficult to push aside the recurring nightmares of Clark in a lab, but she knew he was as careful as she would want him to be. The more likely accident would be Clark throwing a snowball too hard and Lex ending up with a bloody nose. She knew that wouldn''t be the end of the world, that Lex would forgive and forget in less time than it took for the bleeding to stop, but it would still be a sour end to a nice morning.

    "Hey," Jonathan said softly, coming up beside her and wrapping an arm around her shoulders. "You''re worrying again."

    "They''re so happy," she said. "I don''t want anything to ruin that."

    He kissed the top of her head and guided her to a clearing between two trees, so the boys were in easy view. "Look at them."

    Lex tossed a snowball at Clark, and it erupted into a shower of ice crystals on Clark''s sweater. He shrieked with laughter. Clark tossed one back at Lex, but he did it so lightly, the snowball didn''t even make it all the way to Lex before falling to the ground. Lex laughed and ran after Clark with another snowball while Clark cried out in exaggerated fear and ran away. Clark ran just slow enough that Lex could catch up; Lex ran slow enough that it took awhile.

    "Perfectly fine," Jonathan said. His eyes betrayed some small measure of concern as well, but Martha knew it wasn''t worth worrying today. Even if they couldn''t help worrying, they could shield their boys from the fear. Let them live normal, happy lives.

    Martha linked her arm in Jonathan''s, and the two of them strolled down the rows of trees, grateful for the time they had with each other to simply relax and think about something besides work. It didn''t last long, though. Within a few minutes, Clark came running up to him, his cheeks pink from the cold, and said, "So when are we picking a tree?"

    "You boys find one you like?"

    "Umm . . . Let me ask Lex!" He bolted away.

    Martha laughed a little and nuzzled closer to Jonathan.

    A few seconds later, Clark came jogging back. "Nope, we haven''t been looking yet! Just playing."

    This time, both Martha and Jonathan laughed. "Well, take a look around," Jonathan said.

    "Okay!" Clark took a couple of steps away, then turned back. "What if we like all of them?"

    "We''re just looking for one to take home."

    "Oh. Okay!" Clark ran away again. After a moment, Martha could hear Clark explaining to Lex what they were doing. Lex didn''t snap that he already knew; he just replied with agreement and enthusiasm, and their chatter continued, though now it seemed to have much more to do with the trees.

    "That should keep them busy for a minute," Jonathan said, and he turned to kiss Martha on the lips.

    Not even a full minute later, the boys were back to chasing each other and laughing.

    Martha pulled back, chuckling a little herself, and she took a few steps in the direction of the laughter. Lex looked up when he saw her and stopped running. "Sorry, Martha. Running helps warm you up, you know? It''s too damn cold."

    "Lex!" Jonathan chided.

    "Oh! Sorry!" He looked genuinely surprised, though he cringed away from them a little. "My dad used to say that, I forgot¡ª"

    "It''s okay, sweetie," Martha said, giving Jonathan a look to make sure he didn''t press further.

    "I won''t do it again," he said, and he shivered. "It''s really cold."

    Martha looked back at Jonathan and smiled, then she turned back to Lex and said, "I know just the thing."

    Martha and Jonathan walked hand in hand back to the main entrance, where a stand sold hot chocolate. She paid for four paper cups, took two herself and let Jonathan carry two, and went back to find her boys.

    Clark found her first and came running toward her. "Mom? Is that hot chocolate? Is that for us?"

    "Go find Lex."

    Clark grinned and sped off, almost a little too fast for a six-year-old this time, and within the minute, both of her boys were back. She handed them each a paper cup, took one herself from Jonathan, and breathed a sigh of relief when both of her kids stayed close this time. It was hard to run with a full cup in hand, and the rich dark cocoa was hot enough that Lex, at least, would have a difficult time drinking it quickly.

    "Thank you," Lex said softly.

    "Thanks!" Clark chimed in.

    Martha reached down to ruffle Clark''s hair and leaned over to kiss Lex on the side of the head. "Love you boys," she said.

    Lex''s cheeks turned a bit pinker. "Love you too . . ."

    The four of them walked slower this time, admiring each tree they passed. Clark had no reservations about shouting out his opinions in a loud voice. Lex, though, had gone much more quiet.

    Martha had to wonder if there had been more to the running than met the eye. Maybe he''d been trying to distract himself from something that was making him emotional, and now there was nothing to distract him.

    Lex was sensitive in a way he didn''t always show; she couldn''t always predict what would cause him to experience extreme emotions of one type or another. There had been an incident at Halloween, too. Apparently he''d never been allowed to celebrate it, and not for religious reasons or anything: Lionel merely saw trick or treating as a form of begging, so he didn''t allow it. Before she knew about that, Martha had casually remarked that Lex was probably too old for trick or treating¡ªshe didn''t say it, but part of her reasoning was that the baldness made him look older than he was¡ªand he''d almost cried, realizing that he had completely missed out on that stage of life. She''d seen him on the verge of tears, but it was nearly an hour after she''d made the comment, so she didn''t catch the connection right away. She ended up spending a solid half an hour sitting with him and trying to comfort him without knowing what was hurting him, and when he finally told her, she made him a costume based on one of the characters from the Warrior Angel comic books he liked so much. Grinning ear to ear in a homemade costume, he''d looked young enough to be out trick or treating with Clark.

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    Martha hoped he had learned from the incident that he could always be open with her, and she could help him, but considering he was sniffling and trying to hide his face, she figured that whatever it was, he was too embarrassed to come clean with in front of the whole family.

    Maybe she could distract him instead, for the time being, so he could still enjoy himself for now and could talk with her about whatever was bothering him later on. And she had the perfect distraction, because just then, she found the perfect tree.

    It was a deep green, and its evergreen scent was almost sweet. It wasn''t too tall for their living room, but the star would probably bring it just to the ceiling. It wasn''t too thick to carry or too thin for the leaves to cover its branches. Many of the branches were even curved in just such a way that they would accept the lights and ornaments perfectly.

    Clark pointed it out before she did. "That one!"

    Jonathan smiled down at Clark, then over at Martha. "That one looks great. What do you think, Lex?"

    Lex didn''t say anything. He just stared at it.

    "Lex?" Martha asked.

    His eyes glossed over, and he shrugged.

    "Dad, do you have the axe?" Clark piped up.

    "Ah, no, son, I left it in the truck," Jonathan said with a frown. "Martha, maybe you and Lex can go pick it up?"

    "Yeah. Up for a walk, sweetie?" She took Lex''s hand.

    He didn''t say anything, but he didn''t pull his hand away either, and he walked with her back toward the parking lot. She took his empty hot chocolate cup from him and tossed his and hers into the trash on their way.

    The tears had started to fall before they reached the truck. She squeezed his hand tighter until they reached it, then she wrapped both arms around him and squeezed tightly. Shaking, he buried his face in her knit sweater, and within moments, she could feel his tears soaking through.

    She stroked the back of his head¡ªor, in this case, his hat. She wanted to beg him to talk to her, but she knew her son. It would only be counterproductive. She just needed to give him time and comfort. If he wanted to talk, he would; if he didn''t, she might never know what was bothering him, but at least he would feel safe. And that was the only thing that mattered.

    But she couldn''t resist asking, "Something about that tree?"

    To her surprise, he softly said, "Yeah."

    She blinked a couple of times, pulling back to look him in the eyes.

    "It''s perfect."

    Martha wiped away the tears on one side of his face, then the other, shaking her head. "I . . . I don''t . . ."

    "My dad said . . . last year . . . I didn''t deserve to have a Christmas. Because of . . . Julian . . ." New tears streaked down his cheeks. "I don''t even know if he bought a tree or not, I stayed in my room for the whole winter break."

    "Oh, sweetheart."

    "I still don''t deserve it, Martha."

    "Lex¡ª"

    "Julian never even had a Christmas. I was gonna . . . I was saving up my allowance . . . he really liked to be rocked, I was going to buy him one of those indoor swings, Mom said she''d take me to buy it . . ."

    She pulled her precious son into her arms even tighter as he shook with sobs. "You''re such a good brother."

    She rubbed his back, tears stinging her own eyes. This was going to be a rough holiday season. If he was this emotional about something as simple as cutting a Christmas tree, how would he feel when they started decorating it? When they made cookies and cakes? During the big Christmas Eve dinner? When they exchanged presents? They''d gotten a little financial assistance in the wake of the adoption¡ªthey still hadn''t been able to afford much, but they''d bought him some of his favorite treats, a few comic books, and a strategy board game he''d wanted. She was sure most kids would be more excited over the candy in their stocking and a pile of brightly wrapped gifts than over a tree.

    "I don''t deserve . . . Christmas . . . I wasn''t a good big brother . . ."

    "Sh, shh." Her hand moved up to cradle his head.

    "It''s so beautiful, and you guys are so nice to me . . ."

    " . . . Lex?"

    Martha let go and looked over to see Clark, staring up at Lex. Lex sniffled and straightened up.

    "Why do you think that you¡ªthat you''re a bad big brother?"

    "Uh." Lex wiped his eyes.

    Clark crossed his arms. "Y-you''re the bestest big brother!"

    "I¡ªI just¡ª"

    "I thought I already told you that! Did I say it not enough times?"

    "You did¡ª"

    "I can say it more times! You''re the bestest big brother, you''re the bestest big brother, you''re the bestest . . ." He kept repeating himself.

    Lex looked up at Martha, eyes pleading.

    She nodded gently. They''d never really told Clark about Julian; she doubted Lex would say much, but she wanted him to know he had her permission to say what he needed to.

    Lex knelt down in front of Clark. "I had a little brother at my old house. Julian."

    Clark''s face fell. "You want him instead?"

    "No, no, I . . . I wish I could have both of you."

    "Can I meet him?"

    "No. He died."

    Clark''s jaw dropped. "But¡ªbut how did he die?"

    "I . . ." Lex swallowed hard. "I didn''t take good enough care of him."

    Clark''s breath caught, indignation twisting his face into a pout. "You''re lying."

    "I''m not¡ª"

    "Mommy, he''s lying." Clark''s eyes filled with tears as his voice rose steadily. "You have to punish him, for lying!"

    Martha took a step closer. "Now, Clark¡ª"

    "But he is lying! He always lets me go first at checkers and gives me the big half of the cookie and plays snowball fights with me and hugs me when I''m sad."

    Lex said, "Okay, but¡ª"

    Clark turned back to Lex. "If Julian never told you you were the best big brother, he was stupid."

    Lex''s eyes filled with anger. "He was a baby, Clark!"

    Clark''s jaw dropped, and he was silent for a moment. "Julian . . . died when he was a baby?"

    "Yeah."

    It was quiet for a long while as Clark''s lower lip trembled. Martha almost said something, but Clark piped up, "He was your baby brother and he died?"

    "Yeah." Lex sniffed.

    "That''s so sad."

    Lex wiped his eyes.

    Clark fidgeted a little, the toe of his boot tracing little lines in the snow. "I know you wanted to have Christmas with Julian, but . . . he died, so . . . is it okay if you have Christmas with me?"

    Lex swallowed and barely whispered, "Okay."

    Slowly, Clark stepped into Lex''s arms and wrapped his arms tightly around him. Lex hugged back, shaking in Clark''s arms.

    "Do you like the tree we picked?" Clark asked.

    "Yeah, I do."

    Martha reached into the back of the truck for the axe. Her boys needed some space.

    She walked slowly back to where Jonathan was waiting for her.

    His eyebrows raised when he saw her walking alone. "Everything okay?"

    "Yeah, I think so. Lex''s father didn''t let him have a Christmas tree after Julian died. I think all of this is getting to him."

    "He''s sad?"

    "Honestly? I think he might be happy."

    Jonathan smiled.

    They made quick work of the tree, and the two of them were able to get it back to the truck. It would have been a lot easier with Clark''s help, but she was always a little nervous about letting him help, anyway. By the time they reached the truck, the boys were back to chasing each other and throwing snowballs.

    "Oh! Oh!" Clark came running back to them. "Can we look in the gift shop?"

    Martha and Jonathan exchanged a glance. They both knew what Clark was really asking: he wanted to buy some new ornaments.

    Martha was breathing in to tell him no, but to her surprise, Jonathan said, "You boys can pick one ornament each. You hear me? One."

    Clark whooped and grabbed Lex''s hand, all but dragging him toward the little shop.

    Martha raised her eyebrows at Jonathan, and he shrugged. "It''s like you said. They''re happy. Why not make them a little happier?"

    She took his hand, and they followed their boys through the door.

    "It''s not very Christmassy, Clark," they heard Lex saying.

    "Is so! It has red and green!" Clark held up a little plastic spaceship ornament.

    "Okay, whatever."

    "Which one are you getting?"

    "Umm . . ." Lex took a couple of steps, then he smiled and picked a leafless tree ornament from the top row. "This one."

    "A twig?"

    "No, it''s a tree. It''s the one from Charlie Brown."

    "The tree no one liked?"

    Lex shrugged. "I like it," he said softly.

    "Yours is even weirder than mine," Clark said, going over to hand his to Jonathan. Lex did the same.

    Clark walked with Jonathan as he went to to register. Lex hung back with Martha.

    "I know why you like it," she said to him.

    His eyebrows knitted. "No, you don''t."

    "It''s bald."

    He lowered his head, his cheeks turning pink, but Martha could tell he was fighting a smile.

    "I like it, too," she said.

    Lex lost the fight, and he grinned widely.

    Clark came running back to them, and Jonathan carried the little bag with the ornaments. "Ready to go?" Jonathan asked.

    "Ready," the boys chorused.

    They all went back to the truck together. Jonathan turned on the heater, and a soft piano version of "O Christmas Tree" played over the radio, and the boys fell asleep in the back seat, Clark sitting in the middle seat and leaning on Lex''s shoulder.

    Martha''s throat choked up. "Merry Christmas," she whispered, placing her hand in Jonathan''s.

    "Merry Christmas," he whispered back, and he kissed the back of her fingers.

 Chapter 46: The Perfect Birthday

    It had to be absolutely perfect.

    Annie had forbidden Lex to spend any of his saved inheritance on Nikki''s fifth birthday party. He was pretty sure this pregnancy was making her more irritable than the last one had, so he didn''t fight her on it, just agreed to use some of their monthly budget for the decorations.

    Lex was packing up Nikki''s lunchbox for the day while she ate her cereal at the table. Or rather, attempted to eat her cereal¡ªshe kept stopping to ask Lex questions. "How many days til my birthday party?"

    "Three days left." They were holding her party on Saturday; today was a Wednesday, which he thought was pretty late to be sending out invitations, but Annie had insisted it was plenty of time for the families to RSVP. "Eat your breakfast, please."

    She scooped up another spoonful of cheerios, but lowered the spoon after bringing it halfway to her mouth. "Can Onyx come to my party?"

    "It''s going to be at our house."

    "Papa could ride Onyx here."

    "Well, you''re not going to be able to ride her at your party."

    "Why not?"

    "Because you''re going to be busy with your friends. Now, eat your breakfast."

    Nikki pouted. She lifted the spoon again, and nibbled one cheerio from the spoon.

    "Come on, Nikki, you''re going to be late for school if you eat it like that."

    She took a real bite of cereal, then said, with her mouth full, "So what are we gonna¡ª"

    "Chew and swallow."

    She swallowed, coughed a few times, then said, "So what are we gonna do at my party?"

    Lex sighed. "We''re going to have a nice lunch, and cake, and presents, and party games."

    "Like checkers?"

    "No, not checkers, that''s a two-player game."

    "But I like playing checkers with you!"

    "Well, you''re not going to be playing with me, you''re going to be playing with your friends."

    "And Uncle Clark and Nana and Papa?"

    "You can give them invitations when Nana picks you up from school today." He and Annie both had important meetings.

    "Is Uncle Clark at Nana and Papa''s house?"

    "He said he''d come visit you today, yeah. Look at me for a minute, Nikki?"

    She looked up from her cereal bowl, squirming in her chair.

    He showed her the stack of invitations and her horse-covered backpack. "I''m putting these in your backpack. You need to give these out to your friends today, okay? There are fifteen of them, you don''t have to give them all out, but as many as you want." There were only fifteen kids in her preschool class, total, so she could invite everyone if she wanted.

    "Okay."

    "Good." He nodded toward her cereal bowl. "Finish your breakfast."

    "I''m full, Daddy."

    "You barely touched it. Three more big bites."

    "How about two?"

    He raised his eyebrows. "How about three, like I asked?"

    She actually rolled her eyes before picking up her spoon again. Lex shuddered to think what her teenage years would be like.

    He helped her get packed up and ready to go to school. As they pulled up to the school, Lex got out of the car to help her with her carseat, but she was already out of it by the time he opened the back door. "Bye Daddy!" she yelled, grabbing her backpack and running out of the car.

    "Whoa, whoa!" He chased her a couple of steps and scooped her up into his arms, turning her to face him. "Hey. You know I love you, right?"

    "I know, you said that a bajillion times."

    "I want you to have the perfect birthday. You''re sure there''s nothing you want?" She hadn''t even asked for any presents. She''d been all over toy catalogs at Christmastime, but there wasn''t as much around in January.

    Her nose scrunched up, then her eyes went wide. "Nana''s strawberry cake!"

    "You got it, Nikki." He pulled her into a hug, which she returned for only a half second before wriggling away.

    "Bye! Bye!"

    He chuckled and let her go, and she ran off to her classroom ahead of him

    <hr noshade="noshade" size="1">

    But Thursday passed, then Friday, and Lex didn''t receive any RSVP''s.

    He asked Annie about it enough times that it was clearly starting to drive her crazy. "Is it possible they recognize the Luthor name?"

    "I''m sure they do," she said, picking up her curling iron. "But I doubt that has anything to do with this."

    Stolen content alert: this content belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences.

    He paced behind her in the bathroom. "I don''t want our daughter to grow up ostracized because of my name. Maybe I should have had her take your maiden name."

    "I''d like to see them try to pronounce Preobrazhensky." Annie began to curl her hair.

    "I guess it doesn''t matter, they''ve all seen me with her at this point. But . . . what if no one comes?"

    "You made a lot of invitations. I''m sure a few will come out, even if their parents aren''t calling. Parents of four- and five-year-olds are very busy, you know."

    But Saturday morning arrived, and he still hadn''t seen a single RSVP. He knew people were busy, but he had a hard time believing not a single parent could be bothered to send a quick text, even to tell him they couldn''t make it. It almost made him angry.

    The last thing he wanted was for Nikki to have a birthday party like the last one he remembered.

    Lex asked Nikki multiple times whether she had made sure to give invitations to everyone she wanted to come. He worried she had lost them and was too afraid to tell him¡ªhe''d accidentally snapped at her a month ago when she''d lost her third jacket that school year. But she insisted she had invited everyone, and Lex knew she hadn''t lost the invitations, because both of his parents had the invites, along with Clark, and he''d even seen an invitation sloppily taped to the inside of Onyx''s stall, though he explained to Nikki twice more that she couldn''t ride his horse while her five-year-old friends were over. He even checked her backpack to make sure she hadn''t somehow forgotten to give them out. All he found was a coloring book, a few broken crayons, and a couple of shriveled breadsticks from the school cafeteria. Apparently she had traded away her apple for them, and then forgotten she was saving them for later.

    The party was at one in the afternoon. At ten, he and Annie were serving her up chocolate chip pancakes. The last thing he wanted was to put a damper on her day, but she needed to be prepared. "Nikki," he said, sitting down beside her. "I . . . haven''t heard an RSVP from any of your friends."

    "What does that spell?"

    "It just means," Annie said, eyeing Lex, "we don''t know how many of your friends are coming. They haven''t texted your dad."

    "Oh." She picked a chocolate chip out of her pancake and nibbled on it. "Are Nana and Papa and Uncle Clark coming?"

    "They''re going to be a little late," Lex said, refraining from commenting on the way she was eating. "Nana said she needed a little more time on the cake."

    "Oo! Is she gonna draw flowers on it with frosting?"

    "Um, of course," Lex said, making a mental note to text his mother. "I''m going to run a couple of errands."

    Nikki pouted. "No, Daddy . . . it''s my birthday!"

    But Lex was set in his course. If she wasn''t going to have any friends at her party, he wanted to make sure she had lots of presents.

    At a quarter to one, Lex returned with a small pile of extra gifts. Annie had reminded him of the budget again, so he couldn''t get as much as he wanted. He went to check in on Nikki.

    She was playing with her plastic ponies in her room, wearing her jeans and a t-shirt.

    "Nikki, where''s your birthday dress?"

    "I didn''t want to wear it."

    "Didn''t . . ." Lex pinched the bridge of his nose. "Nikki, it''s your birthday, and your friends are going to be here in fifteen minutes¡ª"

    "Lex."

    Lex turned to see Annie standing behind him, her arms crossed.

    "It''s her birthday."

    Lex sighed. "Okay, Nikki. You can wear that if you want."

    She stood up, dropping her toys and running for her game shelf. "Daddy, can we play checkers?"

    "We don''t really have time . . ."

    "But . . . but you didn''t have time yesterday because of work and helping Mommy clean the house for the party!"

    "We had to clean the house for guests."

    She pouted.

    Lex sighed. "We can play until one," he said.

    She cheered, and they set up the game.

    After four reminders that her pieces couldn''t move backwards and two that they couldn''t move onto the white squares, it was five minutes after one. Lex picked her up and carried her out into the living room.

    And he faced his nightmare.

    The room was beautiful. It was decorated with multicolored streamers and balloons, mostly in shades of purple. A huge banner read, Happy Birthday Nicole. There was a pile of presents in the corner and a table stacked high with snacks and goodie bags.

    But the room was empty. Lex glanced outside to see if anyone was coming in¡ªnothing.

    His throat choked up, his eyes stinging. He was going to have to talk to his daughter about the prejudice in their community against Luthors. He was going to have to wipe his baby''s tears away on her birthday . . .

    "Daddy, look! Mommy put out rice krispie treats!" Nikki bounced up and down, running from place to place in the room. "And balloons! Can I play with one, Daddy? Please please please?"

    "Um . . ."

    She gasped when she saw the pile of gifts. "So many presents! Are they for me? Can I open them? Did you buy them, Daddy? Or was it Mommy? Or Santa?"

    "Nikki . . ."

    "What?"

    "I . . ." The room swam. He couldn''t do this. "Maybe we should just go finish that checkers game."

    "But it''s my party time!"

    "I know, but . . ." He knelt down to eye level with her. "How many friends did you invite?"

    She scrunched up her eyes and nose, seeming to be concentrating on counting. "Four," she finally said.

    He blinked. "Just four? Did any of them tell you whether they could come?"

    "They all did! Except one." She giggled. "Onyx can''t talk."

    A sinking feeling overcame him. "Who were the other three?"

    "Nana, Papa, and Uncle Clark."

    "Nikki!" He stood up. "You didn''t want to invite your friends from school?"

    "Well, I love my friends from school, but I wanted to ride Onyx on my birthday!"

    Lex''s breath caught. That was what all of this was about! He scooped up his baby girl in his arms, spinning her and covering her with kisses until she screamed with laughter. "You could have told me you just wanted a family party!"

    "But then Mommy wouldn''t have made that many rice krispie treats!"

    Lex burst out laughing. "You little Luthor!" He tickled her under the arms until she was gasping for breath and pushing away, and then he put her down. "I''m gonna call Papa and tell him to ride Onyx over. That okay with you, master negotiator?"

    She nodded emphatically. "Can we play checkers out here until they get here? And can I have a rice krispie treat?"

    He kissed the top of her head. "It''s your birthday, Nikki."

    <hr noshade="noshade" size="1">

    Lex''s parents got a good laugh out of the story. Clark laughed and flipped Nikki upside down to tease her about it. Annie just smirked and said, "Took you that long to figure it out?"

    Nikki made Clark fly her around the front yard for about ten minutes, then she sat on Onyx for over a half an hour before she agreed to go inside for lunch. She only took a few bites of her pasta before asking Annie to take down some of the balloons for her to play with, and she and Clark played with the balloons until one popped and startled her and Annie had to calm her down.

    Then they sat her down to open her presents, which ended up taking hours, because she kept wanting to play with each toy and read each book and try on each piece of clothing she opened, and at one point she declared she wanted to take a break to ride Onyx again, using the foolproof argument, "It''s my birthday!"

    It was after dark by the time they cut the cake, and Nikki ended up nearly passing out at the table, her slice half eaten. Half asleep, Nikki submitted to long snuggled from both of Lex''s parents before Lex carried Nikki out into the cold evening air to say good bye to her grandparents and uncle¡ªand Onyx. Then he carried her to brush her teeth and go to bed.

    She had been nearly asleep¡ªthough not quite tired enough to refrain from arguing about brushing her teeth¡ªbut she sat up just as Lex was about to leave her room. "Daddy?" she said softly.

    "Yes, Nikki."

    She smiled. "That was the best birthday ever."

    Lex grinned and walked back to her bed. He gave her one last hug and kiss on the cheek. "Until next year," he said.

    "Oh, yeah." She nestled down under the covers. "I already have plans."

    Lex chuckled. "I''m sure you do," he said, and he let her sleep.