《Dream of the Eternal Lovers》


 Prologue

    The entire world broke apart before their very eyes. Grass scattered everywhere, trees were uprooted, and the very earth itself crumbled. Water raised into the air, clouds siphoned towards space, and even mighty mountains were at the mercy of the dark giant hole that had opened up in the sky. There was no hope to be had from this vortex as nothing could stop it from swallowing everything into the void.


    In the middle of this chaos, a girl runs toward a man fighting to reach her. The small rocks and pebbles shoot up like bullets as each cut their arms and faces.


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    One wrong step caused her to fall and all she could do was extend her arm. With his sheer determination, he leaps from one floating boulder to another as the earth gives way to the phenomenal force.


    Their hands were only inches away before grasping each other, but fate was playing a cruel game for a gale wind swept them away. The blue skies were now a thing of the past when the vortex absorbed the last spec of light.


    It was futile to struggle any further. They no longer had control of their bodies or their fate. Helplessly tossed around as the vacuum of space swallowed their screams, all they could do was shed one final tear before letting go of any notion of hope and relinquishing their very existence to the emptiness.

 Chapter 1

    ¡°That dream again...¡± commented Lucy as she sat straight up on her bed. Scratching her head as she yawned, she got up to her feet, grabbed a set of clothes from the closet, and took a shower before heading off to the bus stop.


    Half an hour later, Lucy proceeded towards the large doors that would welcome a crowd of students during the weekday. Today, they welcome the few students who considered a field trip on a Saturday a worthwhile investment of their limited free time.


    Passing through the empty corridor and into the campus, the only signs of life existed on the PE field where students engrossed themselves in sports or the congregation of students who waited by the busses in the parking lot. A rather apt dichotomy between cliques of which she belonged to none. The students around her amused themselves in each other''s company. One group of boys talked about an exciting incident on social media, a group of girls laughed as they point at each other, and general good times were had with the other students. Her phone would provide enough company.


    Opening her messaging app, she revisited the farewell messages from her former friends, promises to keep in touch, and photos from trips to the shopping center they used to hang out at. ¡°Fifteen days¡±, she mutters.


    The time to depart had come as all students boarded the bus. After an hour ride, the college came into view. From a distance, it looked no different than her current middle school, but upon arrival, she saw how great a campus it was. Her mind started wondering if this was a community college, how much bigger a more prestigious institution would be. The buildings appeared renovated, feeling very modern yet preserving the decor of their near-century heritage. Green was everywhere as grass and trees surrounded the campus. The most stunning and eye-catching feature of the campus was the pond, one of many in this area, and the college claimed a rather large one.


    Sometime in the afternoon, when the guide had finally finished the tour, a chance for the students to explore was granted provided they kept their phones on at all times. The pond beckoned her, or perhaps the residents of this pond were the ones calling.


    She saw them from afar during the bus ride but was uncertain of their identity. Now she could confirm that they were mute swans. Her only experience with the beautiful creatures was through images online. Seeing them up close for the first time was an amazing experience. She desired to mark this occasion with her own photographs and filled her phone with memories of the majestic creatures. As she continued to gather a gallery of this scenic view, two swans swam towards each other and touched bills. With their necks bent, their beaks and breast pressed together, a heart had taken shape. A perfect photo opportunity that rarely comes one''s way presented itself before her. A chance for popularity on social media where a single photo can make one famous for a day or two. Luck smiled upon her when it brought her to this moment.


    With a grimace on her face, she put her phone down and moved on.


    From the muddy shore and into the grass, she took a few steps when her foot got caught on some uprooted grass. The slimy soil caused her shoes to lose their grip and before she knew it, she struggled to keep her balance. With nothing to hold on to, it was only a matter of time before she would take an unexpected dip.


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    She closed her eyes and braced herself with a deep breath only to exhale as a sudden force propelled her forward. She didn''t know what was happening until she came to a halt and grabbed on to that which broke her fall. When the initial shock ended, she opened her eyes and saw a young handsome man looking back at her. The face of someone that seemed all too familiar to her was now upon her. Perhaps too familiar as she could feel her pupils widening for she could not believe who had rescued her.


    The sounds of birds chirping, students walking around enjoying their weekend, the bright sun above him shining down, it was a beautiful and lively day. Johan smiles as he waves at his peers, asking how they were doing, and spreading courtesy all-around.


    As he continued his walk, three empty school buses in the parking lot caught his attention. He didn''t mind their existence but it did arouse his curiosity. It wouldn''t be long before he got an answer in the form of a large group of teenagers clustered around the few adults giving directions. Teenagers full of life, full of energy, full of hope. Years had passed him since he was among that age group as nostalgic thoughts run through his head. Seeing the crowd of very excited adolescents, he felt it best to take a detour around the corner of a building.


    From concrete to grass, he stood on an extensive piece of green pasture. A hill with trimmed grass and a few trees scattered about. One could be fooled to think that they entered a park as the only evidence that betrayed that image was its lack of the necessities to accommodate visitors. No vending machines, water fountains, or benches with tables were present. The presence of this area was nothing more than atmosphere.


    He continued his walk and a magnificent view of the pond welcomed him along with its only residents, the local swans. He smiled as he watched them swim carefree feeling like a guest of honor in their home. Indulging at the moment, a sight that many would be thrilled to see was before him. A mother and her cygnets, some who sat on top of her as she swam. A wholesome scene that would melt anyone''s heart.


    The smile he once had dissipated.


    Then an even rarer sight had presented itself. A swan couple who had their beaks touching, their necks arching as their bodies were in close proximity. A heart had formed in front of his very eyes. He gave a chagrined expression before he looked away in complete dissonance. Taking a deep breath, he removed his sight from the pond and continued on as before the distraction, only to find his sight fixated on an occurrence.


    Ahead of him near the edge of the pond, he noticed a person about to step on some mud. Realizing that a woman was going to slip and fall, he started running downhill. As predicted, she lost her footing but before she could fall into the water, he arrived in time to grasp her arm and pulled her out with such force that she grabbed onto him, nearly toppling them. Planting his right leg sternly into the ground, he regained his composure, concluding the event a successful rescue.


    It soon became apparent that he did not rescue a woman but a young girl, surmising that she was one of the students from the field trip. She looked up at him and as he gazed into the eyes of this young girl, he could not believe who was looking back at him. A stranger held on to him, yet a great familiarity had stricken him. An image he had seen before time after time, never able to escape from it, showed itself in tangible form. It so shook him that the world paused at this very moment as he could not move a muscle.


    She eventually pulled herself away from him but remained in the place where she stood. A look of complete fascination that was equally perplexing imprinted on their faces as they were trying to come to terms with who exactly stood right in front of them. A strange aura had emerged that neither could describe yet felt all too familiar. A case of catatonia had struck them, a potent spell that kept them as still as statues forever entranced at the models before them.


    Her phone began to ring, breaking the silence and bringing the world back in motion.


    With her motor skills returning, the girl responded, ¡°I''m sorry but I have to go,¡± and took her leave.


    He turned his head and watched the young girl run off the grass and into the concrete. Johan turned to the pond to catch the family of swans already leaving his vicinity. He turned back to find the girl had disappeared from his sight. He turned to his hand which trembled as it continued to grasp. He turned inwardly as pleasant yet haunting images appeared before his eyes.


    ¡°No,¡± he uttered to himself. ¡°It can''t be.¡±

 Chapter 2

    It took the force of Margaret''s slap on his back to take him out of his stupor.


    ¡°So you are alive,¡± she said. ¡°For a minute, I thought you turned to stone.¡±


    ¡°What happened?¡± Johan asked as his eyes dart his surroundings, ¡°Where is she?¡± Everything around him remained unchanged. The swan''s absence being the only exception. He looked up at the sky and shielded his eyes. ¡°Wasn''t the sun above my head a few moments ago?¡± he commented as he noticed the sun had shifted further toward the west.


    ¡°I just caught you hanging out by the pond,¡± Margaret said, ¡°so I just had to come by and say hello. Are you being forced to study on the weekend too? My dad can be such a pain in the rear, expecting me to study during my free time. I should be hanging out with my friends on the beach. I''m taking tomorrow off. Bad enough he took away my Saturday but if he expects me to just study all weekend, I''m going to demand extra on allowance day.¡±


    Margaret waited for a reply but none would come as Johan preoccupied himself with his worries, pacing to survey the area. She approached him and placed her hand on his shoulder. ¡°But enough about me, what are you doing here anyway?¡±


    ¡°Where is that girl? Where is that beautiful girl?¡±


    ¡°Why, she''s right here, silly,¡± Margaret laughed.


    Johan turned around with a look of expectation. ¡°Where?¡±


    Her smile disappeared in an instant as she placed her hands on her hips, ¡°Really?¡± Not another word from Johan as he was now searching for the nonexistent person Margaret had suggested.


    She approached him once again and held him with both her hands. ¡°Looking for someone particular?¡° It was no use. Even in this constrained state, his head continued to pivot in all directions. Taking her right hand, she slapped Johan''s cheek. The painful sting returned his bearings, but not enough to remove the confused look on his face.


    ¡°Margaret?¡±


    ¡°Welcome back to earth, Johan.¡±


    ¡°I''m confused.¡±


    ¡°I bet you are.¡±


    Johan gasped. ¡°Her. Oh gosh, her.¡±


    ¡°The beautiful girl.¡±


    ¡°Beautiful? Did I...¡±


    ¡°You said earlier there was a beautiful girl. She must be quite a looker that even the very prudish Johan could not help but notice.¡± With a smile on her face, she tilted her head slightly. ¡°After all the time us girls on campus tried to get your attention, someone beat us to the-¡±


    Without warning, Johan grabbed Margaret by the shoulders, causing her to freeze as his hand held her tightly. ¡°Margaret, I didn''t say anything, did I? Did I say anything else? What did I say?¡±


    ¡°Johan...¡± she said with a tense and frightened tone. It resonated with him enough to break the spell that tormented him and released his grip. ¡°Oh my gosh, I''m so sorry. I apologize for the way I''ve been acting.¡±


    Still cautious, Margaret responded, ¡°I''ve never seen you like this before.¡±


    Johan scratched the back of his neck with his trembling hand. ¡°I''m sorry Margaret but I must go home now. I''ll speak with you later.¡± He turned around and started to climb the hill with Margaret not too far behind. Catching up and getting in front of him, ¡°Wait, Johan. I don''t know what''s going on with you but perhaps you''d like to talk about it. Maybe tonight after studying? I have no plans later on. Maybe we can do something to get your mind off whatever.¡±


    ¡°No. I don''t feel so well. I better go home.¡±


    He stepped to the side and continued walking but Margaret intercepted him.


    ¡°You''re probably stressed from too much studying. Come on, Johan. Let''s have some fun tonight. You''re always so uptight. Let loose every once in a while.¡±


    ¡°Margaret, I''m not... I''m not in the mood for anything. Now, please...¡±


    ¡°Then at least tell me what''s going on with you right now. You know, let''s just sit and chat. It''s a beautiful day and nobody''s here. Let''s sit by the pond, just the two of us.¡±


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    Margaret''s words had a calming effect on Johan as he started to relax. He took a deep breath and after exhaling, ¡°Margaret, I don''t want to be rude but, please understand that at this point, I''m not interested in being in a relationship. I commend you for being persistent, but it''s not going to happen. I know that you like me but I don''t want to be forced into anything right now. I don''t mean to say this out of malice because the feelings you are going through, I understand them well, and...¡± After a brief pause, he grabbed both her hands and clasped them with his, ¡°I''m sorry Margaret, but you are a beautiful youthful woman. Any man will be lucky to be with you. Don''t settle for me as the world is your oyster, and you''re the pearl.¡± He released her hands but not before he gave them a kiss.


    Margaret''s face began to turn red and he gave her a wink before taking his leave. She was in so much awe that all she could do was watch him run towards the buildings.


    ¡°Johan, you idiot,¡± she spoke as he started running. ¡°Your words say one thing but I can tell what your heart really desires.¡±


    After a tiring afternoon of errands, all Wendy wanted to do was relax. They placed the shopping bags on the table and headed toward the kitchen. Boiling some water from the kettle, they take out a box of chamomile tea. The kettle whistled, hot water poured onto a cup with a teabag, and two ice cubes dropped into the steaming fragrant sauna in her hand.


    With a cup full of tea and their tablet, Wendy sat on the couch ready for some unwinding.


    The violent shaking of the doorknob jolted Wendy with fright, barely perceptible to grab the cup to keep it from spilling.


    Bursting through the door, Johan immediately heads toward the living room. ¡°I can''t make sense of this," he utters. "There has to be some logical explanation.¡±


    ¡°Johan?¡± Wendy says as they watch from the couch, ¡°What''s going on? I thought you were a burglar for a minute there.¡±


    ¡°What is real?¡± he continued as he paced back and forth. ¡°I don''t know what''s real anymore!¡±


    Wendy got up from the couch and placed their hand on his shoulder, ¡°Why don''t you sit down on the couch while I get you some tea? You look so frazzled.¡±


    Obeying the instructions, he took his seat on the couch. He held his head with his hands while resting his elbows on his knees. A fresh cup of tea was soon presented to him. and without hesitating, he snatched the cup to down the entire content in a single gulp. An exasperated sigh bellows from his mouth as he tosses the cup on the coffee table and laid on the couch.


    ¡°Wasn''t that boiling hot?¡± Wendy asked. ¡°Oh, wait, the ice cubes.¡± Sitting on the chair on the right side of the couch, they continue, ¡°Have you calmed down now?¡±


    ¡°No. I have not.¡±


    ¡°Well, give it time. Just relax.¡±


    ¡°That tea is not going to work. I feel like the world around me doesn''t make sense anymore.¡±


    ¡°You said something to that effect. You want to explain a bit further?¡± Johan continued to breathe heavily, rubbing his distressed face. ¡°Johan, get a hold of yourself. You''re actually starting to scare me.¡± As he stared at the ceiling, his thoughts continuing to run amok, his scrunched-up face was back to its neutral state.


    Whether the tea finally kicked in, Wendy''s words getting through to him, or he willed himself to calm himself down, Johan closed his eyes, exhaled quietly, and calmly began. ¡°I don''t think I ever told you about my dreams.¡±


    ¡°No, not that I can recall.¡±


    ¡°I''ve been having some strange dreams for years and recently they have been more... noticeable, to put it in simple terms. It''s like I''m living inside these dreams. As if I take the role of the person I''m dreaming of.¡±


    ¡°That doesn''t sound so weird. That sounds normal to me. I sometimes dream of being someone else. Well, considering who I am, that''s a given.¡±


    ¡°It''s not that simple of an answer. These dreams are reoccurring. No matter what the dream, there''s always this man and girl who are in love. However, something happens in the dream that separates them. They struggle to be together and try to overcome any obstacle that comes their way, but it always ends with something terrible happening. Before they meet their end, they make a promise to each other. They swear that in the afterlife, they will finally be together at last. And that''s me, saying those words.¡±


    Wendy''s clapping snapped Johan out of his temporary trance. ¡°Amazing! Is that the plot of your new novel?¡±


    ¡°Wendy, please.¡±


    ¡°Oh, I''m sorry. I meant ''novella''. Still don''t know what that means by the way.¡±


    ¡°I''m being serious,¡± he said as he raised himself to sit. ¡±These dreams have been with me for years and I didn''t mind them. Now they''re starting to haunt me. I mean, I''ve always thought everyone had this kind of reoccurring dream, but it''s only now I realize that is not the case. I''ve been having these dreams for so long yet I have no idea what I should do about this.¡±


    ¡°So you''ve been having these dreams ever since we started being friends? Like, since 9th grade?¡±


    ¡°And before that besides. Ever since I was little, even back then when the dreams were just strange and didn''t make sense, I could always count on one person always being there.¡±


    ¡°The girl?¡±


    ¡°I''ve seen that girl so many times that she''s permanently burned into my mind. I can even see her when I simply close my...¡± He covered his mouth, ¡°Oh my gosh!¡° and got up to his feet.


    He covered his face as he could not face Wendy. The veins on both his forehead and hand protruding under his skin did not escape them, however.


    Getting off the chair and following him to the kitchen, Wendy asked, ¡°You really are shaken up, aren''t you? But I''m still confused as to why. Did something happen today?¡±


    He made himself another cup of tea from the now mildly hot kettle and gulped it down as before. After he exhaled, looking at the empty cup, ¡°Today as I was walking near the pond, I saw a girl about to slip and fall. I was just in time to grab her arm. I wasn''t thinking at the moment and pulled her with so much force that she had to hold on to me to keep from falling. This gave me a good look at her face.¡± He took his gaze and directed it toward the living room windows. ¡°Her beautiful face.¡±


    ¡°Beautiful?¡° Wendy said with a smile. ¡°I''ve never heard you call a girl beautiful before.¡±


    ¡°That''s because... that girl... looked just like the girl in my dream.¡°

 Chapter 3

    The upper area of the city is home to the rich, the privileged, the upper echelon. Even the cheapest apartment was out of limits to those who couldn''t afford its mere million-dollar price tag. That was true of Building 2001 which was home to Norman. Working to keep his company running, not a single second of his day would be spared away from his role as its owner. But, despite his devotion to his work, he is not a machine as he stretched his left arm and rubbed the back of his neck with his right. His body demanded a break and when he heard the front door buzz, he practically agreed.


    "Hello, Daughter,¡± he said when he opened the front door.


    ¡°Hello, Sir,¡± responded Lucy as he allowed her to enter his apartment.


    Stepping into the wooden floor and passing by the decorative marble pillars, she took her seat on a gray plush sofa in the living room.


    Before he joined her, Norman headed toward the wine rack and pulled a bottle. ¡°Would you like a glass?¡± he asked as he grabbed two glasses.


    ¡°I don''t know what that is.¡±


    ¡°It''s champagne, dear.¡±


    ¡°I can''t drink alcohol.¡±


    ¡°I don''t see why not. After all, you are growing up now.¡±


    ¡°Growing up, but not fully grown.¡±


    He scoffed a bit as he headed towards the living room. ¡°When I was your age, I was already tasting wine straight from France.¡±


    ¡°I''m just going to say no, Sir.¡±


    ¡°Suit yourself, but don''t be too much of a teetotaler. When you enter the business world, it would be rude to refuse a glass of wine when networking.¡± Arriving at the couch, he took his seat, popped the cork, and poured himself a glass. ¡°Now then, how are your flute lessons going.¡±


    ¡°They''re going well. I can play a few songs now.¡°


    ¡°Good, but don''t spend all your time on your hobbies. Remember, too much fooling around will make you forget things. Always be studying, otherwise, you won''t be a good CEO in the future.¡±


    ¡°I know, Sir. I only practice on the weekend.¡±


    ¡°Good, good, but even then, you must be preparing for the great task ahead of you. Don''t think that just because you''re young you have plenty of time. Youth is fleeting and before you know it, you are middle-aged and taking your seat at the head of the annual meeting.¡±


    ¡°I will, Sir.¡± He took a sip from his glass while Lucy told him, ¡°I went on a field trip to a community college today.¡±


    ¡°Community college?¡±


    ¡°There was an invitation and I accepted. I wanted to see what a formal place of education was like.¡±


    ¡°That''s a waste of time, dear. Community colleges are for the poor. With a single check, I can send you to the most prestigious school in the country.¡±


    ¡°But it was an opportunity I figured you wouldn''t want me to miss.¡±


    ¡°If you feel that you needed to see a university, I could''ve arranged a tour to a finer institution.¡±


    ¡°But I was just thinking that-¡±


    ¡°No, Lucy. You were not thinking. If you were thinking, you''d consider what your role in the company was, and realize you need more than just a lackluster school.¡°


    ¡°I don''t think that''s fair to assume of the college.¡±


    ¡°It doesn''t matter what I think. The reality is that you must go to a proper school and get the right training, and you won''t find that in any second-rate school. In fact, forget about middle school as well. I''ll send you to an institution that will prepare you for university right now. You don''t need to waste your time in a place that lacks the necessary resources that you need.¡°


    ¡°Sir, I made it clear I wanted to go to public school.¡±


    ¡°And I have no idea why. If I had it my way, you would already be a clerk in one of our regional offices, going to school at night, and meeting the heads of the company. Lucy, I don''t think you understand that you are wasting your time with public school. They will only teach you two things: what you will eventually learn on the job and useless information that will never be put to use. You are not considering your future as you should.¡° He sighed and got up. ¡°If only things were my way, you''d be on your way to success now.¡±


    He headed towards the large sliding doors that lead to the balcony. As he stared at the admirable view of the city, Lucy got up from her seat to join him. ¡°Sir, can I ask you something.¡±


    ¡°Depends on what it is.¡±


    ¡°Well, I''ve been having these dreams lately. Actually, I''ve been having weird dreams for a long time, but this time it''s gotten kind of... surreal.¡±


    ¡°What about these dreams?¡±


    ¡°I''ve been dreaming of, well, this girl. She''s not me, but I take her role. And she''s in love with a man who loves her back. It usually takes place in the past, something like a fairy tale. However, something goes wrong. One of them gets into trouble and ends up dying. But before they die, they swear they will forever be together in the afterlife.¡±


    ¡°That''s quite a story.¡±


    ¡°But I''m confused. I keep having these dreams and I don''t know what it means.¡±


    ¡°It means nothing. It''s just as you said, a fairy tale.¡±


    ¡°I don''t know about that. I started looking up the meaning of dreams-¡±


    ¡°Complete nonsense, all of it. Lucy, the only dreams you should be having are the ones where you have achieved your role of becoming the new CEO of the company. If you set your mind on that objective and concentrate on your studies, then you would not be having these worthless thoughts.¡° He takes another swig from his glass and notices his watch. ¡°I must get back to work. Do you have anything else to say?¡±


    ¡°No, Sir.¡±


    ¡°Then I must return to my office. Good day, Lucy.¡°


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    ¡°Good day, Sir.¡± She approached him with her arms stretched out and he passed by her. Drinking the last of what remained in his glass, he placed it on the table on his way to his office and closed the door.


    After a half-hour bus ride, she finally arrived at building 1337. It had seen better days but it was the third floor that Lucy called home. Entering her apartment, ¡°Mom, are you home?¡± but there was no answer.


    She headed toward her room, plopped her bag on a chair, and laid on her bed. One or two cars passed by before there was an extensive silence. At this moment it was as if the world had stood still and she was the only person left. Yet, even with her eyes open, a presence was felt. She squinted before she asked, ¡°Who are you? Why do you show up in my dreams all the time?¡± As she allowed her mind to wander, the image of the mysterious man appeared before her, as vivid as he had always been. His youthful face stared back at her, emitting a strange aura of mystery and intrigue. He reached his arm toward her, beckoning her to accept his invitation.


    The frantic beating of her heart caused Lucy to get up from the bed. ¡°Who are you?¡± she said as her voice cracked.


    ¡°Reincarnation?¡± Johan asked.


    ¡°I''m just guessing,¡± Wendy responded. ¡°I mean, there could be many reasons, but this one sounds more exciting.¡±


    ¡°Stop joking around. I''m being serious.¡±


    ¡°Yeah, yeah. I get it. You don''t have to repeat yourself. I mean, what else could it be?¡±


    "But reincarnation? That sounds a bit too far-fetched, even for you."


    "Think about it. You are having a dream about this guy in the past, and he is in love with a girl that happens to look like the one you just met. They both ended up dying and promised to meet in the afterlife. Maybe the afterlife turned out to be our modern world, making you his reincarnation, and this girl her reincarnation. Easy."


    "Easy? It sounds ridiculous. Way too contrived to be the case."


    "That''s all I can come up with. I mean, you''re the psychologist here and even you can''t figure it out."


    ¡°I''m a student. I barely started learning about how the human mind works.¡±


    ¡°Then what do you think is happening then, Dr. Johan?¡±


    Johan rolled his eyes. "It must be a coincidence. Dreams aren''t meant to be interpreted as literal. Dreams are just visions in your head that your mind creates because it is sorting out information. It doesn''t mean anything tangible."


    "Then why are you so concerned? I mean, you saw that girl''s face, came in here looking so frightened, tell me this story about your long lost lover from the past, and now denying what you saw with your own eyes."


    "I''m not denying the coincidence. I''m not denying the validity of the dream. There''s a rational explanation for everything. But I don''t buy reincarnation as being one of those reasons."


    "I don''t see what else it could be. I''m sorry if it''s not what you wanted to hear."


    ¡°Yeah. Maybe this wasn''t a good idea. I probably should''ve kept my mouth shut.¡±


    He walked away from the kitchen and over to the windows. Wendy followed and rested their hand on his shoulder. ¡°I''m sure you wanted to tell someone for a long time. I''m glad you got that off of your chest.¡±


    ¡°I still wish I didn''t.¡±


    ¡°In any case, you did. And now that it''s out in the world, you can probably interpret it differently. After all that you said, tell me, what do you believe is the actual reason this is happening now that you see it before you.¡±


    Johan gave it a brief thought before he replied. "Maybe I saw her earlier without realizing it. I mean, perhaps I saw her walking down the street but didn''t really notice her, and her image was unconsciously stored in my head. Maybe I noticed her today among the crowd but didn''t specifically point her out. No, that couldn''t be. Her face is so uncannily familiar, but not from a distance. That''s probably it. I saw her earlier but didn''t really recognize her. That''s why I was so shocked when I saw her then and there... except that doesn''t explain my dream. She''s been in my mind for so long... Probably because I saw her years ago? No. That''s not possible either. She must be at least..." With a silent gasp, he turned to Wendy who listened intently to every one of his words. ¡°Forget about it,¡± he concluded before walking away from the window.


    As Johan paced once again, Wendy sat down on the couch and told him, ¡°In my opinion, it doesn''t matter. Whatever the reason that you have met her, it doesn''t matter.¡±


    ¡°What makes you think that?¡±


    ¡°Don''t get me wrong. This is all very important, but you are concentrating on the wrong thing.¡°


    ¡°What are you suggesting?¡±


    ¡°The answer is obvious.¡±


    ¡°It is?¡±


    ¡°Yes, Johan. Of course.¡±


    Looking perplexed at what Wendy was saying, Johan stopped and stroked his chin.


    ¡°Are you really thinking about this?¡± Wendy asked irritated.


    ¡°I don''t understand what you just told me.¡±


    ¡°Johan, you fool. Ask her out on a date.¡±


    ¡°What?¡±


    ¡°You said so yourself. She was beautiful, and she reminds you of this girl you are dreaming of. She is literally the girl of your dreams. So ask her out on a date.¡±


    ¡°I can''t do that, are you crazy?¡±


    ¡°There''s nothing crazy about this. I mean, I''m going to be honest, I didn''t even think you were interested in girls. In all the time I''ve gotten to know you, you never showed any interest in any girl. This is actually quite a revelation that you actually have romantic impulses.¡±


    ¡°I''m not going to ask her out. I don''t even know where she is, and even if I had the chance, I shouldn''t.¡±


    ¡°She doesn''t come to this school?¡±


    ¡°No. She''s probably in middle-¡± He forcefully stopped himself before he could utter another word. After exhaling, ¡°I can''t do anything about this. In fact, it''s better that I forget this whole situation.¡±


    He exited the living room and headed toward his bedroom. ¡°I think I''ll just sleep it off. I must be stressed. I think I''ll just work on my novella tonight and save studying for tomorrow.¡±


    ¡°That''s a shame. Here I thought you were finally going to talk to a girl. Well, I mean a ''real'' girl.¡± Wendy snickers.


    ¡°You must stop making those jokes. You''re going to offend someone.¡±


    ¡°Let them be offended. I don''t care. But let''s forget about me, Johan, if you like this girl, ask her out.¡°


    ¡°Wendy, do me a favor and just forget what you heard. I regret my decision to talk about this.¡±


    ¡°But this could be your soul mate.¡±


    ¡°I''m not going to accept reincarnation as a valid explanation. I''m just going to lay in my bed and clear my head. I''m not going to eat tonight so just make something for yourself.¡±


    ¡°Oh, that''s right. I forgot to make breakfast for you.¡±


    ¡°That''s okay, I don''t care anymore. Just... leave me alone for a moment.¡° With all that said, he retreated to his bedroom.


    After locking the door, he rested on his bed. With the exception of Wendy''s feet shuffling, all was quiet. He closed his eyes but the vision of the girl quickly opened them. ¡°Who are you? Why do you show up in my dreams all the time?¡± He took a deep breath before closing his eyes once more.


    He found himself in a strange place where everything was suspended in the air. Even the very ground under his feet was a great slab of dirt that was breaking apart.


    He heard her cries as a piece of debris hit her, causing her to collapse.


    He ran as fast as he could, stomping on the void of nothingness that kept him aloft. Every ounce of his energy was allocated toward his legs propelling him with all his strength to reach her.


    He watched as the winds picked her up and flung her like a feather in a draft. It did not matter how much he struggled, the void was toying with them as she spun around wildly into the darkness.


    He awoke from his temporary slumber and rubbed his temples. ¡°It''s just a dream. It doesn''t mean anything. I''m just stressed about mid-terms, that''s all.¡± He released his face and stared at the ceiling. ¡°But I can''t deny that she''s been a constant throughout my entire life. No matter what dream I have, she is always there. Always smiling, always cheerful, always encouraging. Always there for me. Always welcomed. Always.¡±


    His heart raced as his breathing got heavier. ¡°Reincarnation? I don''t buy it. I just don''t. There''s no scientific evidence that it''s real. That''s more like a religious thing. It has nothing to do with the modern world. Besides, if it was real, there would be some documented case of it, right? I mean, whoever the person in the past was, I''m sure they left some record somewhere. And it would be just like in my dream, right?" He chuckled. "Wouldn''t that be weird if I stumbled on an ancient document and it followed the same events in my dream? But the odds of that happening make it impossible to actually be the case.¡± He paused briefly to exhale. ¡°But... you know... I''m not knowledgeable about this. I haven''t studied this concept at all. I still don''t believe it, but I shouldn''t be so hasty in assuming things. It may even be a sensitive topic. You know, religious folks believe this stuff, so I probably shouldn''t assume things. I''m a respectful person, I don''t discriminate.¡±


    He looked out the window to witness the sun setting, barely visible in the small gap between buildings. Shifting his body, he felt something hard poke his side. He slipped his hand into his pocket and pulled out his phone.


    The faint sound of a door closing was heard. Not a single sound from Wendy existed. The silence that followed let him know that he was now in solidarity. His only companion in this lonely world was the reflection on the phone''s screen. ¡°I guess there''s no harm in exploring the topic right now.¡±

 Chapter 4

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 Dream 1

    Dream of the Iron-Hearted Lovers


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 Chapter 7

    Hello, my name is Johan and this is my first blog. I''m not sure how to start this but I was having trouble finding answers to a dilemma I am having. I''ve searched online many times but could not find an answer that was satisfactory. It''s about dreams and I was hoping someone could help me.


    Ever since I was young, I''ve been having very peculiar dreams. What makes them different than any other is that there is a girl that has been constantly appearing in them. Always the same, no matter what the circumstances are in each one, she''s always been there. But that''s not all as I also dream of a man. He is not me, but I always take their role and they are very much in love. And every single dream where the two try to live together as a couple, something terrible happens and both end up losing their lives.


    But the dreams don''t end there. Some of them are stranger than usual. I had a dream the other night where I was standing in a strange world that was being torn apart. We were running toward each other while the world around us was being destroyed. Before we could reunite, we were torn apart and thrown into the darkness.


    I know about dreams having meaning but none of the explanations online have helped me in figuring out what is going on with me. These dreams feel much more than just visions in my head, like my mind is trying to figure something out, I just don''t know what exactly.


    I''m hoping someone out there can help me.


    Thanks for reading.


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    A case of content theft: this narrative is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.


    Hello Johan,


    My name is Lucy and I just read your blog post. I am completely shocked at what I just read. I couldn''t believe it because you have just described what I have been going through. I''ve also dreamed about a mysterious couple for as long as I could remember. You''ve mentioned them perfectly. I also dream of a girl and I also take her role. I also dream of a man and they are in love with each other. You even dreamed about that world that gets destroyed. I totally had a dream like that a few nights ago. I felt like I was in a place where everything was falling apart. It feels so unreal.


    I really don''t know what to say. This is too good to be true, but I can''t figure out how else to explain this.


    Please, Johan, can we talk? I really want to know more about you.


    -Lucy


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    You are a most rude person to claim that you can be sympathetic with me when I am being genuine in my plight. You madam, or sir, whatever you prefer, are of a most unscrupulous and uncouth nature that I feel sullied that I must live on the same planet as scoundrels such as yourself. Here I am, waiting for answers to my predicament, and you take time out of your day to mock me when you could be using such a time to...


    Dearest Lucy,


    Thank you for your response. I am quite surprised that your dreams are just like mine. Perhaps you can also tell me about the dream I had earlier today? Since we both share the same dream, I''m sure you know what I''m talking about.


    Waiting to hear from you,


    -Johan


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    You mean the dream of the girl who was to marry a fat guy named Erick? Yeah, I had that dream earlier this morning. I didn''t understand it at first but later in the day I collapsed and had it again. Now it was clear to me and I feel sad when I think about it. The poor girl died trying to save her boyfriend. It makes me feel sad when I think about how that arrow shot her heart.

 Chapter 8

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    I''m going to be honest, I feel like this is all a trick being played on me. But I had that dream today and did not tell anyone. This is so strange, but I want to learn more.


    -Johan


    Can we chat? I would like to chat with you on Google if you don''t mind.


    -Lucy


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 Chapter 10

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 Chapter 11

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 Chapter 12

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 Chapter 13

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    Can we meet this Sunday at the train station?

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    Sure. What time?

 Chapter 15

Love this novel? Read it on Royal Road to ensure the author gets credit.

 Chapter 16

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 Dream 2

Dream of the Medieval-Lovers


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 Chapter 18

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 Chapter 19

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    real woman! A very beautiful one at that!"


    doesn''t exist."


    I am interested in you. I can say that with confidence."


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 Chapter 20

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 Chapter 21

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    Lucy, I hope you forgive me for communicating with you once again, but my heart aches to hear from you one more time. Even though I believed it was the right thing to part ways, I now feel like I have lost a part of myself. I don''t know why it had come to this, why we are the reincarnated lovers of our dreams, but it appears that it has affected me so much. My heart aches every day knowing what my fate has become, but I know that we are not destined to be together because of our age difference.


    I saw how scared you were when we met in person, and I understand completely that you never want to see me again. In fact, I''m certain you have deleted the app. That is understandable. Yet, I could not let this go, no matter how hard I tried, and I needed to do something, anything, to calm my heart and allow my mind to finally move on from this.


    I''m sorry I caused you so much worry, I''m sure you were so scared when you saw that it was an adult who met you on that train platform. I didn''t mean to frighten you or cause you any harm because I didn''t know who I was chatting with myself. I didn''t know I was talking to a kid.


    I blame myself for being such a fool. All I can do is continue to live my life and try to put this behind me. I hope this message doesn''t make you uncomfortable because that is not my intention. I just wanted a chance, a final chance, to share my feelings because I have no outlet to do so.


    Then again, you''re probably never going to read this message. It will never be seen because you probably have already moved on with your life.


    The only thing I can do is express my feelings, even if there is no audience for it. If that is the only thing I can get out of this, then perhaps that would be all that I deserve, and pray that I can finally move on with my life.


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 Chapter 22

Can we meet again?


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    When do you want to meet up?

 Chapter 23

    ¡±Hi, Johan. I was wondering if there was a chance to meet up again. I would really like another chance to talk with you¡±. - Lucy


    ¡±When do you want to meet up?¡± -Johan


    ¡±Give me a few days to think about it. I''ll get back to you later.¡± -Lucy


    ¡±Sure. No problem.¡± -Johan


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    both of our lives?''

 Chapter 24

This tale has been unlawfully lifted without the author''s consent. Report any appearances on Amazon.


    Can you meet me at the train station at noon this Saturday? - Lucy


    Sure. I''ll be there. - Johan

 Chapter 25

    Families going on vacation, men and women heading towards their jobs, and college students were returning to campus as others headed off to their own ventures. The train station was bustling with activity this Saturday as everyone attended to their own personal business, but the only exception was the lonely girl sitting on a bench waiting for noon to hit.


    Try as she may to calm herself, Lucy was visibly shaken. The last meeting ended with her running away and that same sentiment resonated within her at this moment. She had a desire to get up and forget this entire episode as a feeling of isolation and fear was grasping her. Yet, when she thought of going back home to an empty apartment, remembering the feeling of dejection she experienced and having nobody to comfort her, it pinned her in place. ''Is this really what I have to do? Is this really the answer? I''m scared, but there''s no one to comfort me. Is there no one I can trust?''


    It felt like she was waiting for an eternity, a delay that she hoped would last forever, but only a few moments after the twelfth hour, Johan now stood a few feet away from her. Presenting himself before her a second time, all she could do was look with awe at the man that so resembled the one in her dreams. It was uncanny at how much he felt so familiar to her yet still be a stranger all the same. It was as if she had been by his side this whole time.


    The feeling was mutual for Johan and perhaps even more so as the word ''impossible'' ran circles in his head. The girl in his dreams always had this particular look to her that felt ascertainable. It was a look that permeated from the dream world and into reality as the perfect image was right before him. It was such a shock to him that a sense of guilt enveloped him. Dreams were one matter, but he felt the full brunt of reality as she started walking toward him. He wanted to turn around and take flight, but he stood in place with all the energy he could muster.


    Standing a distance from him, enough for her to get a good look without invading his private space, "It really is you," she said. Johan could not reply, at least not until she said. "Thank you for coming."


    Perhaps it was Lucy''s effort to approach him, or perhaps it was her voice that had an effect on him. Whatever it was, it gave him the confidence to relax and respond, "Thank you."


    Not too far from the train station, a small park could be reached by foot. Side by side, leaving a respectful distance between them, Johan and Lucy walked along a path. They tried making eye contact but every time they did so they were reminded of the ones waiting for them in their dreams and quickly diverted their attention away.


    They wanted to remain silent but each knew the reason for this meeting. Someone had to start up a conversation eventually.


    "I..." both said at the same time, causing them to hesitate and returned to giving each other the silent treatment.


    Johan sighed silently and thought, ''Everything about this is so awkward. But I want to talk to her. I have to say something eventually. But...'' He took a long breath and exhaled while closing his eyes.


    "You were the one who rescued me," Lucy said, causing Johan to twitch. "Back during the field trip. I tripped on some mud and almost fell into the water. That was you, right?"


    Johan turned slowly towards her but found her still facing forward, and then returned facing forward. "Yes, I recall. Who would''ve thought that was our first meeting rather than... I guess... when you discovered my blog page. What a crazy coincidence, huh? Ha ha." He ended with a forced laugh.


    "Is it? Is it a coincidence? I mean, we have the same dreams. They seem so... strange. We have the same dreams, and we so happen to have met at that moment, but we go our separate ways. Then I go online and see the blog page and we become friends. And now we''re meeting like this. This can''t be a coincidence. This is just too weird. Jonah, I don''t know anything about this. It''s just weird to me."


    Johan listened to not just her words but the sad tone that was carrying them. He could tell she found the situation awkward as the feeling was mutual. He didn''t know what to reply but after thinking back a few words prior, "My name is Johan." Lucy looked in his direction. "You called me Jonah. My name is actually Johan."


    It took her a few moments before, "Oh, that''s right. I''m sorry. I know someone in my school named Jonah and I guess he was in my mind. Johan is quite a weird name for me to pronounce as well. Oh, I didn''t mean your name was weird, it''s just that I''m not familiar with it."


    Johan gave an earnest smile. "Yeah, I get it. Johan isn''t as common as Jonah. Have you been calling me that for all this time? I mean, when we were chatting. Have you inadvertently been calling me Jonah?"


    "No. I''ve pronounced your name a few times. I really don''t remember how many, but I know I have. That name is just... well..." She turned her head and saw that Johan was chuckling a bit. "That''s an interesting name, Johan."


    This narrative has been purloined without the author''s approval. Report any appearances on Amazon.


    "It derives from John," Johan responded continuing to face forward but looking slightly at her. "If I can remember correctly, it actually goes all the way back to biblical times. The source is from the Hebrew name Yochanan which means ''God is Gracious."


    "Really?"


    Johan started scratching the back of his neck, "I tend to look up random trivia when I''m writing my novellas. I guess I was curious about my name."


    "That''s right. You told me that was your hobby, writing books. Now it makes perfect sense."


    "What does?"


    "Well, I thought you were a kid my age. I thought it was interesting that you were trying to be a novelist. Now, it feels more... normal, I guess. Are you looking to publish?"


    "I''ve been writing since I was in high school, so it''s not too far off for someone your age to be interested in writing. And second, I just like to write as a hobby. I''d rather concentrate on my studies and become a psychologist."


    "I would love to read your novel when it''s finished."


    A soothing effect had enveloped Johan who turned his head and was welcomed by Lucy''s smile. He momentarily paused from the unforeseen reaction, but it eventually made him relax. "Well, in that case, I would love to hear a song from you sometime in the future."


    "You remembered my hobby."


    "Yeah," he chuckled. "How''s the flute coming along?"


    "I''m pretty good, but nothing like the pros. I''m too embarrassed to share my songs. I don''t even post it online. I guess I''m like you and just do it for fun."


    "Well, if you keep at it, I''m sure you''ll be creating songs in no time. I''m certain they''ll sound beautiful."


    She giggled and responded, "You haven''t even heard anything." He joined in the laughter too.


    Another extensive silence followed, but this time it wasn''t so much from awkwardness. The sensation of joy going through them was no different than the ones they would experience beforehand. Only now it felt so surreal knowing who was once unknown was now the person walking alongside.


    "Lucy, I hope I''m not being nosey, but I really have to know, why did you stop chatting with me? You don''t have to answer if it makes you uncomfortable, but I have been curious about this ever since it happened."


    Lucy thought for a moment before answering, "I guess it was the reincarnation you mentioned. I didn''t know what it was, so I decided to look it up. I was actually amazed at the idea that I started looking up all the information I could get. It was then that I realized that..." She stopped herself as she put her hand on her mouth. Once she got the courage to remove her hand, "I guess, I had a lot to think about."


    "So, what did you think about?"


    "I''m going to be honest; I like the idea. I guess dying is a sad thing but knowing that a family member would come back feels like comfort to those who lost someone."


    "I guess I understand what you mean."


    "And what do you think?"


    "Me? I''m still skeptical. I mean, I''m more of a science kind of guy. If there''s no real scientific reason, I usually don''t buy it."


    "Well, how about the past?"


    "The past?"


    "I mean, think about this. There was a time people were alive hundreds of years ago, wasn''t there? They lived completely different lives than ours. If we could travel back in time, it would be so weird, wouldn''t it? They lived so differently from us that it would be like an alien planet."


    "That''s right. People lived differently in the past."


    "It''s quite amazing if you think about it. Thousands of people lived in that era and now they''re all gone. Things changed over time and many things were forgotten. Yet we still know how they lived because of leftovers from that era. Castles, documents, paintings, all of them were done by people, weren''t they? People that are now long gone, leaving behind these things that give us a clue to how they used to live. I think that''s amazing. But it''s a shame we can''t live through that, can we? That''s why I think reincarnation is a nice thought. It''s like a piece of the past returns to the present."


    To his ears, Lucy''s explanation sounded simple, yet he was still astonished at her words. He didn''t find them too profound, but there was a certain feeling within him that made him feel elated. "The past..." he says softly to himself.


    There was a sense of relief coming from Lucy as a smile was on her face which Johan noticed, causing her to be embarrassed when she realized he was looking at her. "It''s just my opinion," she said. "They''re just my dumb thoughts," and veered her sight away from him.


    Johan couldn''t help but smile as they continued down the path.


    --


    The crowd''s density had thinned by evening as Johan and Lucy sat down on a bench at the train terminal.


    "So what does my name mean?" Lucy asked, "but don''t look it up on your phone."


    "What a strange request. What makes you think I know?"


    "You were curious about your name, I''m sure you were curious about mine at some point."


    "Details never escape you, do they?" Johan thought for a moment and when he was ready, while gesturing with his index finger, "Its origins can be traced back to ancient Rome. It derives from the name Lucia, the feminine form of Lucius, which is derived from Lux, a name that translates into ''Light''."


    "You remembered all that?"


    "Yeah..." he chuckled.


    Lucy laughed, "You''re quite smart, Johan, or should I say Yohan... uh... Yocan... uhh..."


    "Yochanan."


    "Uh, yeah. I definitely can''t remember that." She laughed softly. "I guess I''m not as smart as you are."


    "Of course you''re smart, Lucy. The fact that you have a curiosity about these things shows that you are willing to learn. Most people don''t care about learning about the little things in life."


    The sun was now positioned next to a building and a blinding light reflected off its windows straight towards Lucy''s eyes causing her to cover them.


    "It''s evening already," commented Johan. "We''ve been chatting for hours."


    "Yeah, like old times, huh?" Lucy chuckled.


    Johan sighed, "Yeah, I guess, but we better go home now."


    He got up to his feet and in turn obscured the sun from Lucy''s sight. She uncovered her eyes to witness the silhouette in front of her. Gone was the man known as Johan and in his place was a shadow of a build that was familiar to her. A profound sight was before her causing her heart to begin beating. The feeling she knew all too well was now upon her and it shook her so much that she quickly collapsed and fell to her knees.


    "Lucy, what''s wrong?" Johan asked as he knelt down.


    She could not fight the tears flowing from her eyes as she looked up and saw Johan''s profile shining in the sunlight. The aura he gave was so great that she could not help but embrace Johan with a hug. This charged emotion radiated throughout her body and transmitted into Johan''s being, straight into his soul. Had he not been kneeling, he would also have bent to its will as he clutched the young girl closer, and a stream of tears flowed from his eyes.

 Chapter 26

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 Chapter 27

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 Chapter 28

    Ensure your favorite authors get the support they deserve. Read this novel on the original website.


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 Chapter 29

Enjoying this book? Seek out the original to ensure the author gets credit.


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    she was typing. She was typing at that moment. So I was noticed. But what does that mean? Is it okay to reply? Maybe it''s okay to say hello after all, right?¡±

 Chapter 30

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    Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.


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    Johan, I was thinking, maybe we should meet up again.

 Chapter 31

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    The sun rays pierce through Carry''s eyelids forcing her to get up from the couch, but a light headache that was throbbing on her head forced her to lay down again. She could not sleep anymore as she shielded her eyes from the afternoon sun. No longer being able to take it, she finally sat straight up and held her head. ¡°Considering past hangovers, this one isn''t so bad."


    The knocking from the door might as well have been the roar of a jet engine as she covered her ears from the pain it elicited. ¡°I''m coming!¡± she said loudly scurrying towards the door.


    When she swung the door open, "What do you want!?" she asked aggravatingly toward a tall man wearing a suit on. Upon gazing at his stern and mature eyes and his strong stature, she calmed down. "Oh, hi. How are you doing?"


    "Good evening. Are you Carry?"


    "Yes, and who might you be, handsome?"


    "Do you have a daughter named Lucy?"


    "Uhh... yeah..."


    "My name is Richard from the Department of Child Services. We got a report stating that you were seen yelling at your child in the hallway."


    "What? No. That wasn''t yelling."


    "I was inquiring about this with your neighbors. Some of them said this was not an isolated report. Some even went as far to say that you are being neglectful."


    "Hey, I''m just disciplining her. That''s what a good mother does."


    "According to my report, your daughter was holding on to you and you pushed her to the ground."


    "I didn''t do that yesterday."


    "Did you do that prior?"


    "Uhh... maybe... I don''t remember. But I didn''t hit her or anything, okay?"


    "Is your daughter home?"


    "Of course, but why do you want to know?"


    "I would like to have a few words with her."


    Carry was thrown off by this request, but seeing as there was nothing else she could do, "Alright, fine. I''ll get her right now," and turned around.


    "Lucy, come here for a minute. I promise you''re not in trouble." She walked into the dining room where she noticed a plate with eggs, sausage, hash brown, and a glass of orange juice on the table. Surmising Lucy was in the kitchen, "There''s someone here looking for you," but the kitchen was empty. She headed into Lucy''s bedroom but simply looking from the doorway was enough to warrant it vacant. ''She''s not here? Where is that girl? Oh no, I can''t tell that officer she''s not here, or I''ll get in trouble and go to jail. I don''t want to go to jail. I better think of a lie.''


    Though her light headache made it difficult to think, a realization occurred to her. Returning to the doorway, "I forgot, she''s visiting her father."


    "Are you divorced?"


    "Pretty much. You''ll have to speak to my ex-husband about her."


    "Can I have his number?"


    "Sure. Let me give it to you."


    She found a random piece of paper and scribbled a bit before handing it to Richard. ¡°This one on top is his number for your records, and the one on the bottom is my number for... uh... you, ha ha ha.¡±


    "I''ll have a word with both your ex-husband and your daughter. Please be aware we take all reports seriously."


    "But I''m not doing anything to her. These neighbors, they''re just gossiping."


    "Good day, ma''am."


    With him taking his leave, she closed the door and exhaled with relief. ¡°That was close. I almost went to jail because of that stupid kid. But thank goodness she was with her father. Finally, that good for nothing is useful. Might as well just stay with him at this point.¡± She headed towards the dining room table where the plate full of food was sitting, barely lukewarm, with a note underneath the glass of orange juice.


    Microwave for a minute. -Lucy


    Carrie looked at the plate of food for a moment before saying, ¡°I dunno how to use the microwave. I''ll just go to the rich people place and get me some breakfast there.¡±


    If you spot this narrative on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.


    Plate and all, the meal laid out from Lucy for her mother went straight to the garbage bin.


    ¨C


    ''I knew this was going to happen,'' Johan thought to himself. ''This was a mistake. I should have never returned to chatting with her. I now invoked something in her that made her believe it was okay to ask for another meetup.'' He brushed his hair with his hand as he walked toward his desk and grabbed his phone, only to place it back after confirming that Lucy''s message did not disappear. ''I told her that I can''t see her anymore and I have to stick by it. I should stay away from her. It''s for her own good. Her own good.'' He paused for a moment before appending, ¡°Her own good...¡±


    He sat on the bed with his hand on his face rubbing his brow. ¡°This has gone too far. What if someone finds out I''m talking to a kid? I''m going to get in trouble. For my own sake, I better put a stop to this. I have to do the right thing.¡±


    On his phone, entering Google Chat, he began to type.


    Lucy, please accept my apology but I have to be honest with you and myself. At the time, my only intention was to look back at the conversations we were having, only to get wrapped up in our chats once again. But despite the good time I''ve been having, I feel so guilty. This isn''t right. I not only have to reject your invitation but stop communication altogether. This is wrong on so many levels and I can''t risk both of our lives.


    I shouldn''t be hanging out with you both online or off. I''m sorry but this is the last time we''ll be seeing each other.


    His eyes veer toward Lucy''s name and her offline status. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes before hitting send. A waft of air escapes him as he dropped the phone onto the bed. ¡°Why are decisions based on morality much more difficult compared to decisions based on vices? I guess that''s the way of this crazy world and its asinine rules. Besides, none of this matters anymore. I have decided to move away. Far away. Away from the corrupt influences of the world.¡±


    A strong aroma interrupted his thoughts, one of blueberries. Looking at his phone one last time, seeing Lucy still offline before the screen faded, he exited his room.


    "Hey there, Johan." The stove was lively with activity as Wendy tossed eggs on a pan and sizzled sausages on another.


    But the main attraction was steaming from a pot. "Is that blueberries?" Johan asked, pointing towards it.


    "I''m making homemade blueberry syrup. You''re not the only one who can look stuff up online, you know."


    "I thought I was going to make breakfast from here on."


    "No way, I''m not going to let you beat me, Johan. I''m going to be the star chef in this house, you hear me?" Wendy smiled and gave Johan a wink.


    Johan laughed a bit, "Okay, fine with me."


    With breakfast ready and the syrup poured into a mason jar, the table was set for Wendy''s special breakfast. "Where did you get a mason jar with a spigot?" Johan asked.


    ¡°I found it in the thrift shop. That''s what gave me the idea for the syrup. Go on, try some.¡±


    He opens the valve and pours a bit on his pancakes. Once he closed the spigot tightly, he took a bite. With astonishment, "This is pretty good."


    "Even better than what you can make?"


    "I never made syrup before."


    "Then I win, right?"


    "You''re going to have to let me make some before you announce yourself the winner."


    "Then don''t bother."


    ¡°Alright. I''ll give you this one.¡±


    Both laugh. ¡°If you approve, then Francesca is definitely going to love it.¡±


    ¡°You''re going to give her some?¡±


    ¡°Yeah, but I''ll let her taste it tonight when she comes over.¡±


    Johan paused a bit before he proceeded to cut another piece of his pancake. ¡°Well, I''m sure she''ll enjoy it.¡±


    ¡°What was that?¡± Wendy asked rather abruptly.


    ¡°What do you mean?¡±


    ¡°You paused for a moment.¡±


    ¡°Yes, I believe I did.¡±


    ¡°Yeah, you paused.¡±


    A confused look was on Johan''s face at the accusation and responded, ¡°Okay.¡±


    "It''s only Francesca. Hera''s not coming over."


    ¡°Alright, that''s fine. I hope you two have fun.¡±


    "I have a feeling you''re not the romantic type, Johan."


    Johan stared at Wendy with further confusion and some consternation. "Okay, if that''s what you think."


    Wendy put their fork down. ¡°I don''t want to bring up our near-death experience again, but something has been bothering me, and it''s your attitude.¡±


    ¡°Well, if you don''t want to bring it up, then don''t.¡±


    ¡°But I''m worried about you, Johan. This isn''t just about the car accident, but the cause of it. I know what happened. I saw you before Francesca yelled. You saw them kissing, right? That must have triggered you.¡±


    ¡°I don''t get ''triggered''. I don''t even like that word.¡±


    ¡°But it''s true. That''s what happened. You saw it happening in the back of your car and you looked so angry. Johan, do you want to tell me what is going on with you?¡±


    Johan put his fork down. ¡°Here I thought I was going to forget my troubles and have a nice breakfast.¡±


    ¡°What is troubling you? Why don''t you tell me?¡±


    ¡°How about you mind your own business? You''re always in my face.¡±


    ¡°Can you at least join us tonight?¡±


    ¡°No.¡±


    ¡°What good reason do you have to decline?¡±


    ¡°I just said to mind your own business.¡±


    ¡°I wish it was, then we can have a chat.¡±


    ¡°No. No more chats. Chats are the reason for my- ¡± Johan got up from his seat. ¡°I''m not interested, okay? Just accept that. I''m going to get ready for classes.¡±


    Johan started heading toward his room when he heard, ¡°Is it me?¡± which prompted him to stop.


    ¡°What about you?¡±


    ¡°Well, ever since high school, when I came out...¡±


    ¡°No, Edwin. This has nothing to do with that. Besides, I do support your change. I haven''t mentioned it, but I''d figured you know that I... uhh... care.¡±


    ¡°Do you really? Because it doesn''t sound like you do.¡±


    ¡°Look, you can do whatever you want. My opinions do not matter. Even if I was against it, so what? You can still do you. So go ahead and do whatever it is... that you do.¡±


    Johan continued toward the bedroom door but not before hearing, ¡°What about the dreams?¡±


    ¡°Excuse me,¡± he said as he turned around.


    ¡°Are you still having those dreams?¡±


    ¡°That was weeks ago.¡±


    ¡°But are you still having them?¡±


    ¡°It doesn''t matter anymore. That''s in the past. Besides, I did the right thing. It''s over. I''m done.¡±


    ¡°You''re done with what?¡±


    After realizing what he said, Johan cleared his throat. ¡°Nothing important. Just know that those dreams are over, and so am I.¡± With all that said, he finally entered his room and locked the door behind him.


    He groaned as he leaned on his desk. ''I wish he would shut up at times.'' His eyes immediately target the phone on his bed. His hand hovered over it but he pulled it before he could have a chance to grasp it, forming a fist instead. Scrunching his eyes, looking to his side, and releasing a sigh, he picked up the phone, went into Google Chat, confirmed his message was still unread and tossed the phone back into the bed.


    Going up to the window, he leaned against the wall to watch pass him by. ¡°This world hates me so much.¡±

 Chapter 32

Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.


    Lucy, please accept my apology


    Disregard that last message.


    I changed my mind. I would love to meet you again.

 Chapter 33

    "I figured I should visit before you went on your trip," Lucy said.


    "I don''t mind you visiting me while I pack my things, but I''m expecting good news," said Norman.


    "I''m still thinking about it, but I''m starting to veer into denying your request."


    He sighed while folding his shirt, "I don''t think I''ll ever understand you, Lucy. You are very intelligent yet I feel you are just wasting your talents in an institution that doesn''t actually give you dividends."


    "You mean school in general?"


    "I''m not saying education is not important, but you can learn a lot more being in the real world. Look outside the window. See how much of the world you can see from up here. It''s not the top of the building, yet you stand higher than the majority of working men right now. Many wish they could be at this height but instead live in a dirty apartment because that''s all they can afford. You have no idea how lucky you are Lucy to have a father who can afford such a place, and you too can afford to live in a high-rise apartment. Many conclude their lives looking up at the world but you have the power to look down upon it."


    "Neither of those sounds appealing."


    "But one is more preferable than the other."


    Lucy sighed silently as she looked in the direction of the window. Rising from the buildings, mountains capped with snow surrounded by white fluffy clouds, all underneath a bright blue sky. The buildings around them jotting up from the ground like giant spires. Even at the height in which her father lived, all other buildings surrounding his were tiny by comparison.


    "Sir, why do you want money so much?" She asked.


    "It''s not that I want money, it''s a necessity of life. You won''t get taught this in school but the average yearly income for most of the population is less than thirty-thousand a year. That may seem like a big number to you who has no responsibilities, but trust me when I tell you that it is so tiny when you-"


    "Sir, I don''t want to hear a speech or be lectured. Why do you want money so much?"


    He closed his luggage and began rummaging through a stack full of folders. "That was what I was answering."


    "I want to hear it from your words, not some scientific data."


    Without pausing his flipping of papers, he thought about her question before responding, "Money is important, Lucy, otherwise you will be poor for the rest of your life. I do not want to live in poverty and I would do whatever it took to make my money."


    "Whatever it took?"


    Norman paused as he turned to her who in turn gave him a look of worry. He continued his rummaging. "I guess those were the wrong words. Just trust me, Lucy."


    "So you''re just scared you''re going to lose everything?"


    "In a way, yes."


    "What are you afraid of losing the most?"


    "Well, my lifestyle, for one thing. I did get used to being rich, I''ll admit."


    "Anything else?"


    "I guess my life."


    "Anything else?"


    He stopped what he was doing to finally give Lucy the attention she was inadvertently demanding. "Alright, I get it. What''s on your mind?"


    Standing a few feet from her, Lucy looked up at his tired eyes, "When you come back, can you take a break?"


    "I''m not certain. I''m a busy man, after all."


    "How about we do something together? You know, just go out on an excursion. Let''s hang out and do something fun."


    He scoffed as he turned around and continued his packing, "Still a child. Come now, don''t let everyone else convince you that you are still a baby."


    "I''m not a baby."


    "But you''re not acting like an adult either."


    "That''s because I''m not an adult. I''m a teenager."


    "And when I was your age, I was already working for my father in his company. This is the reason why I''m such a success."


    "Then why not just take a break? You have a lot of money already."


    "Is that it? You want money?"


    "No, Sir. You don''t even have to buy me anything. We can even just stay here and chat if you want. Let''s just spend some time together."


    "But time is money, Lucy. If I take a break, that''s valuable time being taken away from my business. Besides, I''m always on call so I have to be prepared for anything that can happen."


    "That''s fine with me. If you need to leave, you can. I just want to spend some time with you."


    "Come now, Lucy. What do you really want? Is there a dress you desire? Maybe a new car?"


    "I don''t know how to drive."


    Stolen content alert: this content belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences.


    "If you join my business, I''ll teach you how to drive, and then I''ll buy you a nice car. I''m certain this is what it''s all about. You''re around that age after all."


    "Most fathers would teach their daughters without resorting to some kind of payment."


    "Those fathers are idiots."


    "What?"


    "You do not get anything for nothing in this world, but that''s the mentality today''s men are teaching to their children. They spoil them and then wonder why they are so entitled. They are fools, but I am different. I spent years learning human psychology, I know all these things that we do automatically without a thought as to why. These men are slaves to their own feelings and emotions."


    "Slaves to your feelings and emotions?"


    "It''s a complicated subject that you''ll learn later, but pretty much, we have no control of our emotions until we decide to do so. The power to influence is the power to manipulate. The majority of people simply run on their so-called feelings, but not me. I am in control of them and with this knowledge, I have the power to control others."


    "Dad, that sounds awful."


    ¡°I beg your pardon?¡±


    ¡°Uhh... Sir. Sorry, Sir.¡±


    After a brief pause, he continued with his packing. "The world is awful, Lucy. The sooner you learn that the sooner you will be able to handle reality. Don''t learn it the hard way, just trust me. Now, are we done?¡±


    "Just one more thing. What if I reject your offer? What if I don''t want to work for you? What if I decide to go my own way?"


    "Then you will be making a pretty big mistake."


    "But what does that mean between us?"


    "Between us?"


    "Every time I come here to visit, you keep going on and on about business, money, making me your employee. I don''t recall the last time we actually did something as father and daughter."


    "That was back when you were a child, Lucy."


    "I don''t even remember back then either. Were you ever there for me?"


    "What are you talking about? I''ve always been there, back when your mother and I were together."


    "I don''t recall you ever being there for me."


    "That''s because you are too young to remember, but I have photos and video of it, so I know what I''m talking about."


    Lucy''s eyes lit up. "Can I see them?"


    "Maybe later, I still got a lot of packing to do. Why don''t you ask your mother?"


    "In that case, I don''t have anything else to say."


    "Very well. Then if you''ll excuse yourself." Taking the hint, Lucy turned around and headed out the door. "Wait," her father said, causing her to stop and turn around. "I got a visit from a man claiming to be from the Department of Child Services. Is everything okay at home?"


    "Yeah... I guess,¡± Lucy said distraught.


    He looked at her with his discerning eyes that gave her chills. It was a cold and distant stare that barely gave her relief when he returned to his packing, "My offer is just that, an offer. If you don''t accept it, then I have no interest in you."


    With a blank look on her face, Lucy turned around and continued to exit his apartment.


    --


    The door opened in front of her. A very rough and wild-looking man with a stubble beard and frantic hair was now standing in front of Lucy. She was so intimidated that she almost grabbed her emergency whistle only for her mother to suddenly be heard saying, "You got everything, Jacob?"


    "No, I''m fine," said the man as he walked out and headed toward the elevator. Covering her nose from the offending odor left behind, Lucy entered her apartment.


    "Did you forget something," said her mother walking into the living room only to stop when she saw Lucy. "Oh... hey."


    Lucy let go of her nose. "Mom, I got to ask, do you have any video and pictures of me when I was younger."


    "Yeah."


    "Can I see them?"


    "I guess, but I don''t remember where I left them."


    "What do you mean? Don''t you have any on your phone?"


    "The technology back then wasn''t equipped with that stuff yet. I had to use, like, a digital camera I guess."


    "Then where is the camera you used?"


    "That thing is long gone. I now have a phone that can take 1080p pictures. I didn''t need that."


    "But you have the pictures backed up, right?"


    "Backed up? I guess."


    "So where are the backups?"


    "Umm... I don''t know. I think your father took them."


    "Dad did?"


    "Yeah. I''m certain. He got so spiteful of me that he tried to take everything. Too bad he didn''t succeed. Stupid."


    "But you have copies, right? In your phone, or your computer?"


    "No."


    "No?"


    "No. Why would I if I had the camera?"


    "But you gave the camera away."


    "Yeah but I don''t need the camera for that. You can upload things to the cloud now."


    "So it''s online?"


    "No. Of course not. Why would I put pictures of a kid online? I think that''s illegal and stuff."


    "Mom, I''m serious. Do you have anything of you, me, and dad together?"


    "Together? No way. I deleted those pictures. I don''t want to see that man ever again."


    "But you at least have pictures of us together, right?"


    Her mother stood there with a confused look and then answered, "I... think..."


    "You think?"


    "Maybe... perhaps... somewhere in my room. If you look, you can probably find it."


    "Find it? I shouldn''t have to find something that precious."


    "Well, in that case, it must be in there somewhere so just look for it, okay?"


    "In that case, let''s look together."


    Her mother''s eyes grew wide as she stutters, "Ahh... Uhh... I can''t... I got to go and... deliver a pizza."


    "No, you don''t."


    "Well, I got to make a pizza."


    "Then let''s make it together."


    "No, this is an adult pizza. For adults only."


    "Okay... then do you need any help with anything?"


    "No. In fact, I must go now for adult reasons I can''t explain to you, okay goodbye." Her mother scurries to the doorway and exited the apartment.


    Lucy stared at the closed door before her eyes target the shoes right next to the doorway. The door opened slowly and quietly a hand reached in and grabbed the shoes before quickly closing again. With a sigh, Lucy proceeded toward her mother''s bedroom.


    All afternoon was spent rummaging in her mother''s things looking for any kind of storage device. A few memory sticks were found and when she plugged them into her computer, they contained photos of Carry along with men Lucy did not recognize. A lot of them were of her partying with said men, others of them in a bedroom, naked, and performing acts that caused Lucy to throw the memory stick away and wash her hands.


    The less provocative photos were dated recently and when she did the math, the earliest photo she could find was two days after her parents separated. It was a photo of her mother with yet another strange man. Out of the hundreds of photos, none of them contained her father, which she expected, but Lucy herself wasn''t present in any of them either. ''When was the last time I recall her taking a photo of me? And Dad, is there even a point of asking him?''


    Despondency was looming over her like a dark cloud as she got up from her computer. Grabbing her phone, the two cracks reminded her that she still needed to replace it, and realizing she forgot to ask her father for a new one, she plops it back onto the desk. ''By now he should be heading towards the airport. I guess it''s too late to ask him. But he''d probably only buy me one for ''business'' reasons anyways.''


    The sun was now lowering enough for its rays to shine through her window as a streak of light appeared on her face, causing her to cover her eyes with her hand. Heading toward the window, she held on to the cord to lower the blinds when she noticed the mountains, the same ones she saw earlier in that high rise, looking tiny from the distance of the apartment building she called home. The buildings that towered over everyone in her visit to the Upper Area were now minuscule as if they could be plucked by her fingers from where she saw them.


    The vantage point from the third floor of her apartment wasn''t anything compared to the height where her father lived. Yet, even at this height, the streets below looked tiny, the buildings were model kits, and the cars mere toys.


    ''I don''t need a giant fancy apartment building to feel better about myself. Nor do I need either of you. There''s only one thing I want, and looks like I''m going to have to get it myself.''


    She stepped away from the window, got on her computer, and opened Google Chat. ''22 Hours Ago'' was written underneath Johan''s last message. After a deep breath, she replied, ''Do you want to meet this Saturday?''

 Chapter 34

    "Hey, handsome," Wendy commented when Johan came out of the room.


    "Hello," Johan said neutrally as he headed for the front door.


    Sipping their cup of tea on the couch, "Where are you going?"


    "What does it matter?"


    "Well, on your way back, make sure to bring back some tortillas. Francesca and I are going to-" The door shutting loudly startled Wendy enough to nearly spilling their tea on the couch as they struggled to salvage as much as they could.


    In the garage after entering his car, he placed the phone on his charger which lit up the screen revealing the time, 11:15 am. As he exited into the street, ''Maybe her parents will tell her she can''t go. Maybe she''ll realize that this is a mistake and cancel it herself. Maybe her friends will call her and she would rather hang out with them. Yeah, any of those situations can happen.'' He glanced at his phone and when he saw no activity from it, he lifted it and place it back on the dock. When the little red light appeared, he sighed, ''I said I was going to meet up with her today and now she''s waiting for me at the train station. I have to keep my promise, no matter what I''m thinking. It''s too late to turn back now. Besides, there''s nothing left to turn back to. I might as well proceed.''


    With four minutes left before noon, he arrived at the train station. At the spot where he would meet Lucy a third time now was an empty seat. ''Early this time, or perhaps she changed her mind after all. What do I want? What do I really want from life? Do I want some kind of validation, or am I just too stubborn to accept the reality? Maybe I should just abandon the world after all. There''s nothing left for me here.''


    ¡°Hey!¡± a familiar voice interrupted his thoughts as he turned around and saw the one he most wanted to and dreaded to find.


    Lucy stood in front of him, with a cheerful attitude, her hands behind her back. "Nice choice of clothing," she commented. "I was expecting you to come in a suit or something like that."


    Johan was left speechless at the smile that she was projecting. She had a very coy mannerism as she looked at him with her gentle eyes. It was as if he was meeting a completely different person. He was expecting her to disappear into thin air and find himself still in bed, but as far as he could tell, the smiling girl before him was indeed Lucy.


    "You look nice too,¡± was all he could reply.


    As if he hit a switch, he noticed Lucy''s face turning red right before she turned around. "Thank you," she responded facing away from him. This action further confused Johan who thought, ''I must be dreaming. Yes, that must be it. This must be another one of those weird dreams I keep having. It just has to. There is no way the same girl I met last time is the same one here embarrassed by my lackluster compliment.'' He looked around for assurance of his thoughts but could only conclude that he was indeed conscience.


    Lucy finally calmed herself as she turned around and asked, "So... How are you?"


    "I''m doing okay," he replied. Another awkward pause as Johan simply scratched his head and looked around his surroundings. ''Is this a sign of things to come? Maybe it was a mistake to accept this. I should forget this whole thing.''


    "Do you want to go to the park?" asked Lucy.


    "The park?"


    "Yeah. That small park we went last time. How about we go there and, you know, chat?"


    "Oh... sure. Yeah, let''s go then."


    --


    The distance between them was expected, but considering Lucy''s attitude earlier, Johan thought she would be open to conversation. But it appeared that their return to the park also brought along the awkward silence from the last meeting they had. ''To think, I thought it was going to be no different than our chats. What''s with this hesitation? I mean, she was quite proactive moments ago. What''s with the awkward silence?''


    "We sure do chat a lot, don''t we?" said Lucy abruptly, bringing Johan''s attention to her.


    "Oh... yeah, we sure did."


    "Yeah. It was really great, huh?"


    "Yes. It sure was..." As hard as he tried to sound calm, he could not deny the unnerved quivering. ''She can feel the awkwardness through my words, I just know it. She''s going to figure out I feel weird about this. I think this is it. She''s going to find this too strange to continue on. I knew this was a bad idea. I just had to accept her invitation, didn''t I? I should''ve stuck to my original decision and not-''


    "Johan."


    "Huh?"


    "Are you okay?"


    "Yeah, I''m fine."


    "Well, are you still having them?"


    "Having what?"


    "The dreams. The dreams of the couple?"


    "Oh... well, not as of late actually."


    "Me too. I haven''t had the dreams in a while myself. Do you think it means anything?"


    "Well, I''d like to think that, perhaps, we are finally coming to terms with these dreams and are, you know, moving on from them."


    "What does that mean?"


    "I think it means that... we''re finally overcoming them."


    "Overcoming them? Like... the two are finally..."


    Johan could see Lucy''s face turning red before she turned around. "What I mean is that our minds are, you know, finally working things out."


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    "And what does that mean?" she asked, her head still turned.


    "It means that... well... sometimes dreams are visions that we have of ourselves and... sometimes we conjure up images to try and solve dilemmas in our lives. Yeah, let''s go with that."


    She eventually calmed down and faced him, "That sounds pretty reasonable. How do you know so much about this?"


    "I''m taking psychology."


    "Oh, right. You did mention that. That sounds interesting."


    Lucy''s smile had returned and despite the joyous feeling that was gleaming from her, Johan felt compelled to turn away. "Yeah, That''s probably it."


    A vibration was felt and heard from his pocket. When he pulled his phone out, he groaned at the notification.


    "What''s wrong?" asked Lucy.


    "Nothing. Just spam, that''s all."


    "Oh, that''s right. I forgot I need a new phone. My friend dropped mine and broke it and now I can''t get it to turn on. It was a cheap old phone so I''m not too worried about it, but I could use another one so we can continue to..." Lucy covered her mouth and exhaled before removing her hand. "I''m sorry. I forgot."


    "That''s okay," responded Johan. "I''m sure your parents will get you one soon."


    "Oh yeah. That''s right, my parents will buy me one... probably."


    Silence returned along with the awkwardness as they continued down the path. His blunt exhaling did nothing more than enforce how queer the situation had become at this point. ''No matter what we talk about, it''s just making things worse. I can''t keep going on like this. This was a bad idea after all. I have all the proof I need. I have to put aside my feelings and do the right thing. I have to end this now.''


    He turned to Lucy, "I have something to tell you."


    The ringing from Johan''s phone interrupted him and upon seeing who was calling him, "Oh, come on," he uttered before turning to Lucy. "Just give me a moment,¡± he told her before walking a few feet away from Lucy.


    "What is it?" he said on the phone.


    "Johan, where are you?¡± Wendy said on the other line, ¡°Where are the tortillas?"


    "Just for that? Get them yourself."


    "You''re on your way home, right?"


    "What makes you think that?''


    "Because it''s Saturday."


    "And?"


    "You don''t have classes on Saturday."


    "So what? Don''t you think that perhaps I''m hanging out with friends?"


    "Hey, wait, you actually made a friend?"


    "That''s quite rude of you, isn''t it?"


    "So you really are hanging out with another human being?"


    Johan paused for a bit as he looked back at Lucy before turning back. "Yes, I''m hanging out with someone right now."


    "Who?"


    "That''s none of your business."


    "Tsk, I knew it."


    "You don''t believe me, do you?"


    "Johan, I''m worried about you."


    "I had enough of you saying that."


    "But I am. Just tell me what is going on. Why are you acting so strange? You fluctuate between being happy and being super mad. Now you''re just wandering around aimlessly."


    "Stop assuming things. I really am out with a girl." Johan jolted upon realizing what he said.


    "A girl? Margaret?"


    "No, not Margaret."


    "Clearly not me since I''m here at home, and you wouldn''t count me as a girl anyway."


    "What makes you think Margaret is the only girl I know? And you, I guess."


    "As far as I''m concerned, that''s the case. Every other girl you simply push away. No wonder Margaret thinks the alternative side of you."


    Johan started rubbing his temple. "Alright, I apologize, okay? You just got me so mad, but at the same time, I don''t appreciate you saying horrible things about me."


    "What horrible things? I never said anything horrible about you."


    Another pause as he tried to control himself. After shaking his head, "Listen, what if I told you I was with a girl?"


    A brief pause before Wendy answered, "Johan, do you need someone to pick you up?"


    "I''m serious. What if I told you that? What if I said that... there''s this girl I like?"


    "Johan, I can''t understand anything you are saying."


    "Am I breaking up?"


    "No, I meant, you''ve been saying strange things lately."


    "Please, just consider what I''m saying right now. What if I told you that I was in love with a girl? A girl that... I can''t be with?"


    "Is this about that dream?"


    "In a way. I mean, you said so yourself that I was the reincarnation of the nobleman."


    "Yeah, but you brushed it off as nonsense."


    "What if I told you I''m starting to believe it? Maybe I am his reincarnation."


    "Johan, I didn''t say it in a way that was believable. I mean, I like the idea of reincarnation but I think you are taking this way too literally. I mean, remember the first time you told me about that dream? You said a girl tripped and you rescued her. You said she looked just like the girl in your dream. Well, I don''t think that''s the case. I think you are just seeing things because you are very lonely."


    "Edwin, please-"


    "Is it true then?"


    "No. There''s only one girl who looks like the one in my dream, okay? I''m not seeing her image everywhere."


    Yet another pause before Wendy responded, "So you said you''re out with a girl?"


    "Yes."


    "And this girl... looks like the girl in your dreams?"


    It was back to Johan hesitating before he answered, "Well... possibly."


    "And you''re hanging out with her right now?"


    "Uhh... yes..."


    "Then take a picture of her and send it my way."


    "I beg your pardon?"


    "If you''re telling the truth, then you will send me a picture of this girl."


    "What is the matter with you? Who just asks for a random photo of a stranger?"


    "So she''s a stranger?"


    "You know what I mean. That''s very rude and presumptuous of you to demand such a thing."


    "Looks like I''m going to have to be brutally honest. I''m sorry Johan but I think you''re starting to lose your mind or something. Maybe you need to seek a psychiatrist."


    "I am not lying. She''s right here, okay?"


    "Then let me talk to her."


    "No!"


    "So you want me to take your word for it while you are in this state of denial?"


    "I''m not denying anything, I''m hanging out with a girl."


    Wendy sighed, "Johan, come home, please. We need to have a talk."


    "What talk?"


    "Just come home."


    "I''m right now hanging out with someone and I don''t care if you believe me or not."


    "Knock it off, Johan. You''re being delusional. I don''t know what you are thinking but it''s not healthy. It''s not normal.¡±


    "Normal? What is normal? I don''t care what you think, okay? I especially don''t care what you think about me."


    "I''m just doing this for your own good."


    "Don''t even bother, okay? You want to talk about me behind my back, go ahead, but don''t expect me to be compassionate about your issues."


    "I''ve never talked behind your back."


    ¡°Well, in any case... just...¡±


    ¡°Will you please just come home?¡±


    "How many times must I tell you? I''m hanging out with someone, and that''s all there is to it."


    "There you go again with that imaginary girl."


    "I''m not imagining things. She''s with me right now."


    "The girl from your dreams?"


    "Well... let''s not consider that."


    "Johan, I hope this dream hasn''t clouded your judgment. I mean, if you''re not careful and you see this girl everywhere, you''ll end up going out with someone you will regret."


    "I''m not seeing this girl everywhere. Why don''t you believe me?"


    "Then let''s say you are telling the truth. Who are you going out with? You should be careful, okay?"


    "What logic are you going by to say that? What is the matter with me going out with a girl? That''s normal, isn''t it?"


    "I''m not trying to creep you out or anything but you seem to be confusing fantasy and reality. I didn''t want to mention this but the way you talked about that peasant girl, she seemed quite young.¡±


    ¡°What?¡±


    ¡°Just my speculation. However, I recall that there was a field trip with some middle school students on the day you saved a girl. Johan, did you save one of those kids? Was it one of those kids who you saved on that day? Because you said she was beautiful and I''d hate to think you said that to a middle school student."


    Johan''s brow scrunched up, "What are you inferring?"


    "What I''m saying is that you''re letting your imagination lead you to-"


    "No, I meant, what if I did save one of those kids? What if the girl I did save was one of those middle school students on a field trip?"


    "Uhh... well, that would be creepy."


    "Because I called her beautiful?"


    "Hey, your kind of creeping me out."


    "What exactly is wrong with that? If I find a girl beautiful, what does it matter how old she is?"


    "Johan, where are you going with this? Are you saying that you''re in love with a kid? Because that''s gross."


    With all his might, Johan slammed his phone onto the concrete.


    Staring at his now broken phone with eyes full of anger, clenching his fist, and breathing heavily, he recalled his surroundings. His eyes darted toward Lucy, completely shocked at what had transpired just a few feet away from her.

 Chapter 35

    The machine dispense the water bottle and Lucy reached in to grab it, never diverting her gaze at Johan sitting on a bench in the distance, his face buried into his hands. As much as she wanted to comfort him at the moment, she figured it was best if she left him alone. Yet her compulsion to help him gave her the idea of walking over to him and slipping the bottle of water between his arms. This got Johan''s attention as he lifted his head to see Lucy''s concerned face.


    "Thank you," he said accepting the bottle, uncapping it, and gulping it down. Exhaling, now staring at the half-empty bottle before turning his attention toward Lucy, he patted the empty spot on the bench next to him. Lucy accepted the invitation.


    "I and my roommate are having a fight. Well, it''s more like I''m having the fight and losing. I overheard some things that I didn''t like but there''s nothing I can do about it. I was actually thinking that maybe I shouldn''t have accepted this meetup due to this, but I also wanted to leave the apartment. I just don''t know what I should be doing now.."


    "If you didn''t feel well, why did you accept?" she asked him.


    "I guess... because I got mad."


    "You accepted to hang out with me because you were mad?"


    "Maybe. I don''t really remember. All I can recall was that I made my decision at the last second. I really don''t know what came over me."


    "So you really don''t want to see me anymore?" Johan looked at Lucy who now had a look of despair. "You don''t have to force yourself, Johan. If you don''t want to hang out with me, that''s fine. I was happy that we could hang out, even if it was a little bit." Lucy lowered her head. "I had fun while it lasted."


    A solemn ambiance was in the air as Lucy thought to herself, ''Maybe this wasn''t a good idea after all. Maybe I was being selfish. Maybe I should have listened to him. Maybe... I should just walk away and never see him again.''


    "What would you think if I said you looked beautiful?" he asked her.


    Lucy turned her head to find Johan smiling slightly. His depressed expression was now of subtle amusement. "I''m sorry if I offended you. It''s just that... the first time we met was when you tripped and I caught you... I thought you were quite beautiful."


    This unexpected quip from Johan made her equally embarrassed as she covered her face. She couldn''t help but giggle as she responded, "You are so dirty."


    "Dirty? Did I say something..."


    "No, not that. But then again...¡± She continued to giggle between words as Johan sat there with both confusion and worry. ¡°I mean... you tapped your hand on the bench."


    "Yes, but if you felt uncomfortable sitting next to me, then..."


    "Johan, don''t you understand. I mean, that''s where people sit. You kind of touched a whole bunch of strangers butts you know," and her giggle intensified that she had to cover her mouth. "I''m sorry but that''s what I thought when you tapped your hand on the bench."


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    Her giggle transformed into laughter as Johan couldn''t help but join in the hysterics from Lucy''s juvenile joke. ¡°I think they clean the benches,¡± he said trying to control himself.


    ¡°You know they don''t do that. Just admit it, you wanted to touch people''s butts, you pervert.¡± Both let go of their inhibitions to let out their frustrations and fears through their laughter.


    After a few minutes when both finally calmed down, Johan walked over to the trash bin where the remains of his phone now lie. "I guess I''m in need of a phone too."


    "Which phone are you planning on getting?"


    "If you''re thinking of the latest iPhone, I''m not that extravagant. I actually budget my money. I''ll probably get an older model. In fact, I should probably get one before I go home."


    "Are you going to get one today?"


    "Yeah. I shouldn''t be without a phone."


    "I could use this opportunity to look for a phone myself if you don''t mind."


    "You want to buy one right now?"


    "No. I don''t have the money, but when my dad gets back, I''ll let him know the phone I want."


    Johan paused for a moment before he answered, "Alright. Let''s go shop for a phone."


    Taking their leave from the park, they found an L-shaped plaza with a phone boutique carrying a small yet varied selection. The latest phones were being displayed prominently, amazing Lucy.


    "This phone looks so cool," she commented as she spotted a very sleek-looking iPhone.


    "With a price tag to boot," Johan replied. "I can''t afford that."


    "Maybe my dad will buy it for me if I ask him."


    "Can your dad afford such a phone?"


    "Yeah. He''s quite wealthy. He owns a company and makes a lot of money. He wants me to work for him."


    "That seems nice."


    "Not really. He says he wants me to quit school and work for him right now."


    "He actually wants you to quit school?"


    "Yeah, but I tell him I''m not interested yet. In fact, I don''t think I''m interested in working for him at all. I want to find my own way in life."


    "Well, I can understand that. I guess the option is nice to have though."


    "Now that I think about it, he probably won''t buy me that phone unless I agree to work for him. Oh well, I guess I can just get another cheap phone."


    "Then I guess we can start actually shopping then. Let''s check out the phones here."


    A good half-an-hour was spent looking at the selection, chatting about which phone they would love to have, and determining which one they would actually get. Johan eventually settled on a phone, and both headed toward the checkout counter.


    The female store clerk commented, "Looks like you two had a good time."


    "Yeah," responded Johan. "She''s interested in getting a phone, so she''s very excited to tell her parents about it."


    "Is she your niece?"


    "Oh no. She''s my girl-" He immediately stopped himself. After a very brief pause, "She''s just a friend."


    "That''s nice. Well then, that''ll be $109.99."


    With his debit card already in hand, Johan tapped it on the machine and the charge was approved.


    As they walked out of the store, "I thought you were buying a cheap phone," Lucy said.


    "This is cheap. You saw how all the other phones cost nearly a thousand."


    "Must be nice to have enough money to call that cheap."


    "Don''t think I can just buy a hundred-dollar phone every time. I have to take care of this one. Next time, I''ll have to control my anger."


    "Oh look," Lucy said excitedly as she pointed to another store. "That''s the popcorn store my friend took me to last time." She started going through her pockets and when she pulled out a roll of $1 bills, she began counting. "I can afford something. Can we go and get something?"


    Johan smiled, "I''ll buy whatever you want."


    "Really? I don''t want you to waste your money."


    "Consider it a thank you."


    "Thank you for what? I didn''t do anything."


    "You made me feel better earlier. I want to thank you for that."


    An expression of surprise yet calmness was on Lucy''s face. Embarrassment followed as she couldn''t help but smile and cover her face.


    They began walking toward the shop in which Lucy glanced at Johan smiling softly. He was not paying her any attention but she couldn''t help but look at the man next to her, the very same man that reminded her so much of another man she had never met yet had always been by her side.


    She clasped her hands and put them close to her heart as she took a silent breath and thought to herself, ''Beautiful...''

 Chapter 36

    "This is an interesting concept," commented Johan as he looked at the menu.


    "I know, and it tastes better too. I tried the cheddar cheese and bacon; it was really good."


    "Should I try it, then?"


    "Yeah, go for it."


    "Okay, if you insist."


    Right in front of their eyes, the freshly hot popcorn was scooped, topped with their preferred flavors, and served to each of them. Taking their buckets, they found a bench to sit at where Johan took his first taste.


    "Hey, this is good," Johan commented.


    "I told you," said Lucy.


    "What about yours?"


    "I ordered the Fruit and Nut mix. This one is really good too."


    "Let me try some."


    Lucy offered her bucket full of the brightly colored popcorn where he took one and popped one into his mouth. An expression of delight was on his face. "This is good too. It''s nice, but the syrup is too sweet for me."


    ¡°Maybe, but I really like it. I want to come back here every chance I can get and try all of the flavors.¡±


    ¡°Yeah, maybe I can check it out every once in a while as well.¡±


    They remained on the bench and continued to chat about the different varieties of flavors before they finished their buckets. As they walked out of the store, Lucy''s excitement was still fresh as she pranced.


    "That was so good," she commented.


    "It sure was."


    "I wonder how many stores are there? I should look it up in case we go somewhere else."


    Chuckling to himself, Johan said, "Let''s head back to the park."


    Time continued to pass them as the two eventually made it back to the train station where they sat down and let their conversations flourish naturally.


    "I might want to go to your school when I attend college," Lucy said.


    "That''s an interesting choice, but it''s just a community college."


    "What''s the difference between a community college and a... uhh... what is a bigger college called?"


    "University."


    "Oh yeah. I kind of forgot. But what''s the difference between the two?"


    "You went on that field trip, right? What did you think of it?"


    "It looks no different than my current school, except that it was bigger."


    "The design is the same, but the actual classes differ from a middle school. For one thing, you are responsible for attending class on time. There are no bells."


    "Really? But I assume you''ll get in trouble if you don''t arrive in time."


    "Kind of. It''s not like you''re going to get detention, but you will get reprimanded if you do it too much. Some students choose not to attend class rather than be late."


    "You can do that?"


    "Yeah, but again, do it too often and you will get in trouble. Pretty much, they''re giving the responsibility of attendance to you."


    "But in a way, that''s no different than middle school."


    "Or high school for that matter. I figured it was going to be different than public school but turns out that in many ways it''s kind of the same. It''s just that I don''t live with my parents anymore. I''m living on my own now."


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    "Then it''s settled. I''ll go to your school when it''s my turn to go to college. Then we can hang out together."


    "Lucy, by the time you enter college, I''ll be a graduate and have a full-time job."


    "Oh yeah. College is like, four years, right?"


    "More or less. My suggestion is to aim for university instead. I mean, if I had the choice, I would."


    "In that case, I''ll work hard to get into university." Johan laughed softly as Lucy got on her feet, "How about we go somewhere else now?"


    "Somewhere else?"


    "Yeah. I''m eager to check out some other place. What do you want to do now?"


    This suggestion prompted Johan to notice the sky, particularly the sun beginning to set. "Actually, maybe we should call it a day now. Any more activities and it''s going to be nighttime before you know it."


    "What''s the big deal?"


    "You can''t be out late at night, you know?"


    "What''s so bad about us hanging out late?"


    "It''s not so much that it''s a problem with you, it''s more like a problem with me."


    "Do you need to be somewhere tomorrow? It''ll be Sunday so I figured you had the day off."


    "Yeah, I do, but I''m talking more about your parents. They''re going to wonder where you are."


    "That''s okay. My mom doesn''t care."


    "What do you mean?"


    "My mom doesn''t even know where I am right now. I could be on the moon and be seen on the news, but she wouldn''t care."


    "But what about your dad?"


    "I don''t live with him but he''s the same, maybe worse. He''ll only care about me if I work for his company."


    ¡°The whole employment thing, I figure. But that means he wants you to be close to him. It''s not like he just sees you as an employee."


    "Whatever he sees me as, it definitely isn''t as his daughter."


    A foreboding feeling had risen within Johan upon hearing her response. "So I guess, in a way, I was right. You did meet me without your parents knowing where you went."


    "Pretty much."


    "Still, you have to go home somehow, right? I don''t like the idea of you taking the bus home in the evening, let alone late at night"


    "You can take me home."


    "Me? But you can''t be seen inside my car."


    "Why not?"


    "What if someone we recognize sees us?"


    "What about it?"


    "They''ll think you''re getting in a stranger''s car, and they''ll think I''m picking up some random kid. It''ll look bad."


    "That''s not going to happen."


    "How can it not? It looks so suspicious, especially with people that know us. What if one of our classmates spots us? Then we''ll be in trouble."


    "When you put it that way, someone probably already did, right? I mean, we''ve been hanging out all day." A look of realization was all over Johan as he started looking around. "Johan, calm down, nobody has seen us."


    "But they could''ve. I mean, we don''t know when or where they might have."


    "What are you so afraid of? I mean, if they saw us, let''s just tell them that we''re hanging out."


    "I can''t tell them that."


    "But that''s the truth, right? Just tell them the truth."


    Johan was taken aback by the comment that prompted him to get up. "Lucy, that''s not going to work. People will think terrible things about me. In fact, they''re probably spreading rumors about me now. Oh gosh, maybe this wasn''t a good idea after all."


    "Johan, stop. I don''t get you. You''re acting so weird when we were having a good time. What''s the problem? We''re just hanging out."


    "You don''t understand, Lucy."


    "Then explain it to me. Why are you so worried?"


    "Think about it. I''m an adult and you''re still a kid, and we don''t know each other. People are going to assume I''m doing something bad by default and telling them the truth will just make things worse. The thing is adults can''t hang out with kids."


    "But why?"


    "Because they think it''s inappropriate."


    "Is that all? That''s stupid. We''re just hanging out. I mean, you''re not a creep."


    "Everyone else will think otherwise."


    "Well, so far, all the people we talked to didn''t think anything like that. That phone lady thought I was your sibling. I think that''s what people will think when they see us."


    "I''m certain that''s an exception. I mean, what would happen if we run into someone on the street and they see us? What will we tell them if they confront us?"


    "Well..." Lucy grabbed Johan''s arm and placed it around her shoulders, causing Johan to jolt in place, "Then let''s tell them we''re on a date."


    "WHAT!?" Johan shouted removing his arm. He felt so mortified as Lucy laughed. "I''m not telling people-"


    "I''m joking,¡± Lucy intercepted through her fit of laughter, ¡°It was just a joke. But still, relax. People are just going to think we''re having a good time because we are. They''re not going to question if you are a stranger or not. They''re not going to think I''m being kidnapped or anything like that. As long as we''re having a good time, they''ll think the best of us."


    "Well, maybe with strangers, but what if we ran into someone we know."


    "Then let''s just tell them I got lost and you were helping me find my uncle or something. Or you can be my uncle."


    "You want me to lie?"


    "Yeah."


    "But that''s wrong. You are deceiving people when you tell them something that isn''t true. If you lie once, you have to keep up the lie and then you have so many lies that it all collapses on you and you''ll have to face the-"


    Lucy pulls his arm along with his body down and placed her index finger on his lips. With a cheeky smile, "Johan, you worry too much."


    This unexpected action from her took him by surprise as he looked into her eyes. A sort of bliss started enveloping him, allowing him to relax. But after a few moments, a heat was starting to emanate from his face. This sensation transferred to her finger just as she realized how close she was to him.


    She stepped back quickly, and both turned around, not daring to eye each other any further, keeping their exhaling as quietly as possible. A few moments of silence passed before they had the courage to turn around and face each other again.


    "Okay, fine,¡± he said. ¡°What do you want to do now?"


    "Let''s go to the beach."


    "The beach? Right now?"


    "Yes, right now."


    "But it''s getting late, and I don''t want you to ride the bus at night, and I can''t take you home because of what I said..." Lucy''s impatient look kept him from continuing and after taking a deep breath, "then let''s buy a ticket then."

 Chapter 37

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 Chapter 38

    "Thanks for you letting me take out my shoes," Lucy said.


    "Are you sure you''re going to be okay?"


    "I just have to explain to them why I''m barefoot, it''s no problem."


    "I meant dropping you off a few blocks away. I''m not certain that..."


    "You worry too much, Johan. That''s why I''m walking to the entrance barefoot, you know? So you won''t have to get close to the building."


    "Do you want me to pull in?"


    "It''s fine. I know you don''t like the idea of dropping me off. Besides, I''ve walked from the bus stop late at night at times. It''s no big deal."


    "I guess I''ll take your word for it."


    Grabbing her shoes and sweater, she opened the passenger side door and stepped into the rain. Her bare feet made a splash on a small puddle as she pranced a bit, laughing joyfully. "Make sure you contact me on Google chat when you get home, okay?¡± She waved goodbye before running into the distance, the rain covering her like a curtain closing after a play.


    ¡°What kind of gentleman am I?¡± he said. ¡°Letting her run in the rain barefoot. I should be ashamed of myself.¡±


    --


    Up the elevator and entering her home, an audience of nobody awaited her inside. Nothing was out of the ordinary except that her mother''s bedroom was ajar. ''She''s not home,'' she thinks to herself. ''Oh well. I''m going to wait by the computer. I want to be ready when Johan-'' At that instant, she heard the door open.


    "Johnny, please," she heard her mother.


    "Come on, babe, lighten up," and the voice of a man.


    Seeing a stranger wrap his arm around her mother coming out of her room stunned Lucy in place. The feeling was mutual when she was spotted by the two.


    "Lucy," said her mother in a slurred voice, "wha-what.... what are you-you doing up this late at night?" Lucy was in such a catatonic state that her mouth refused to open. Her mother turned to the man, "Let go of me. Just go home."


    "Let''s go to my place, babe."


    "Get out of here, Johnny."


    "Hey, you promised."


    Help support creative writers by finding and reading their stories on the original site.


    "Get out of here, you idiot!"


    The stranger looked at Lucy, then Carry who slumped herself on the couch, before he headed out the door.


    Lucy walked over to her mother only to be repelled by the pungent smell of alcohol.


    "Lucy," her mother said while trying to sit straight, "I thought you were in bed."


    "Well, I''m not."


    "Huh? What was that? Are you... uhh... talking back to me...?"


    "I''m just being honest."


    "Well, yeah... I get that but..."


    "Mom, who was that man?"


    "Huh?"


    "Who was that man that came out of your room?"


    "Forget about him. I sure will. He wasn''t any good."


    "Mom, do you have any idea where I was?"


    "No."


    "No?"


    "Huh?"


    "Mom, do you know where I was today?"


    "Oh... visiting your father."


    "He''s on a business trip."


    "He is? He''s not leaving me, is he? He owes me money!"


    "Mom... I just got home."


    "Oh, okay..."


    "Mom, it''s raining hard. I''m soaked. My shoes are wet, I had to run here barefoot."


    "What? Why? Why were you in the rain? I told you not to play in the rain... or your father said. I don''t know. You should know better. Now go to your room and... think about it."


    "Mom, what if I told you I was hanging out with someone today?"


    "I thought I told you to go to your room."


    "What if I told you I was out on a date with a boy?"


    "You''re too young to be dating, you know that. Now stop it. I thought I told you to go to your room."


    "What if I told you that I was dating an older man?"


    "Huh?"


    "An older man, mom. I went on a date with an older man."


    "An older man wants to go out on a date with me? Where? Does he have money?"


    Lucy groaned, "I''m taking a shower," and headed to her room.


    --


    "Johan!" Wendy said when he entered the apartment, "Where have you been?"


    "Oh, Hi Wendy."


    "Don''t just ''Hi, Wendy'' me! I''ve been worried sick." A moment passed as they inspect Johan. "You''re soaked."


    "Yeah," Johan laughed, "I didn''t anticipate the rain."


    "This is no laughing matter. Where have you been? After that phone call, I couldn''t get in contact with you."


    "Oh, sorry about that. I slammed my phone against the concrete floor."


    "You did what?"


    "Yeah. I lost my temper and broke my phone, but I bought a new one, it just hasn''t fully charged yet. Must be my charger, it''s getting quite old. I guess it''s time to buy a new one."


    "You lost your temper again. Oh my gosh. Listen, Johan, you may not realize it but you''re losing control of yourself. You need to seek help."


    "No, Wendy. I''m fine now. Really fine."


    "No, you''re not. You only seem fine now but next thing you know, you''ll be losing your mind again. You need to seek professional help. I''m serious."


    "Did you buy those tortillas?"


    "Well, yeah, I bought them earlier."


    "Great. Sorry, I couldn''t get them but I was out and about."


    "What were you doing all day and night? It''s past ten."


    "I was out with a girl. That''s all."


    "You''re actually serious?"


    "Yeah."


    "Really?"


    "Yeah."


    "You were out with a girl?"


    "Uhh... yes."


    It was as if he was speaking a different language. Wendy couldn''t process what Johan was telling them as they stood by, trying to analyze the situation. He patted Wendy''s shoulder, "I''m taking a shower, okay? As you said, I''m soaked."


    "Uhh... yeah, sure..."


    Johan headed for his room but before he entered, "By the way, I apologize for earlier. I lost my composure back then and said some nasty things. I hope you forgive me."


    "Oh, yeah, no problem."


    When he entered his room, Johan sighed. He smiled to himself as he removed his shirt when his eye caught sight of his laptop.


    "That''s right. She''s waiting for my response. But I''m sure she can wait ten more minutes, right?" He removed the rest of his soaked clothes and after putting on his bathrobe, headed towards the door. His fingers fiddle with the knob as he kept glancing at his computer. Taking a deep breath, he opens the door and stepped out.

 Dream 3

    Dream of the Revived-Lovers


    HEREBY APPEARETH, THAT CONTRARY TO REASON, ILL SUCCESSE ATTENDETH ON THEM, ESPECIALLY IN OCCURRENCES OF LOVE


    The Young-Adventurous Man, bold and brave, became a merchant to explore the world once he came of age. He acquired a crew of merry men, all of equal courage, and did include one that did prefer women''s dress, which was most abhorrent. Yet, all gathered to his ship and gaiped around the world for treasures and the exotic.


    But on one such adventure, a Young Runaway Girl entered the ship and told the men, ¡°Do let me hide here for they want to take me away. Please, I will do anything you wish.¡± The Young-Adventurous Man saw guards coming for her and he told them she was not on his ship. They wanted to investigate but he told them off which offended the, and a great brawl commenced. The Young-Adventurous Man won the battle and before the guards could call for aid, the ship set sail for the sea.


    She was most thankful to him and wanted to return the favor. He made one request: to be his bride, for when she jumped unto his ship, he could not help notice her beauty and fell in love with her right then and there. When he took her hand, he promised the world to her, amazing journeys awaited, and treasures the likes she had ever seen. She fell so madly in love with him that she accepted without question.


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    Both married and went on to live a romantic adventure as they sailed the seas, explored exotic places, and made much profit.


    One day, another ship was crossing their path. They tried to steer away when, just as the ship was near, a black flag with a skull on it was hoisted on the foreign vessel. In no time, pirates invaded the Young-Adventurous Man''s ship and a great scuffle commenced. As he fought with all his might, the Young-Bride was taken captive.


    He would not give up on the Young-Bride and ordered all the men to chase the ship. With his heart full of passion, they chased them to an deserted island. At the shore, the fighting continued as the Young-Adventurer fought to reclaim his bride.


    His vigor and rage had won out as he took the head of the fiendish Captain and all other pirates scurried from fright.


    The two lovers hugged and kissed once again but it was not over as a naval ship arrived and arrested everyone, including the Young-Adventurer''s crew.


    ¡°I am innocent. Innocent I tell you,¡± the Young-Adventurous Man pleaded. ¡°For it was I who took the Pirate Captain''s head and rescued my beloved.¡±


    ¡°Who are you to say such a thing?¡± proclaimed the Naval Captain. ¡°For you have as your bride the Princess of the Kingdom. You have taken our Princess and we will punish you.¡±


    And it turned out to be true that the girl her rescued was the Young-Princess running away. He was now in serious trouble.


    He was tried, the court found him guilty, and he was to be sent to the guillotine. The Princess protested but it was in vain.


    The faithful day came and the Young-Adventurous Man''s days were over as the blade took his head and that was the end for him. The Princess, so full of grief, took to the highest tower and fell to her demise as well.

 Chapter 39

    Lucy covered her eyes upon lifting the blinds, but it wouldn''t take long before they adjusted to the morning light. Staring at the tall buildings of downtown in the distance, she squints to barely make out the tip of a rectangular roof. ¡°That should be it,¡± she told herself as she stared at what she convinced herself to be the roof of the train station''s bell tower. Her attention turns downward to the puddles on the street reflecting the morning sun. She wiggled her toes on the carpet which caused her to smile momentarily before sighing. ¡°I better get ready for school.¡±


    --


    "Is that a new phone?" Jenny asked.


    "My dad bought it for me,¡± Lucy answered. ¡°I didn''t get to choose it, however."


    "Well, at least you have a new phone. Sorry for last time. I didn''t mean to get into your business and break your phone. I was just fooling around."


    "That''s okay. I probably shouldn''t have been so rough too. That''s why I have a lanyard now. See?" Flipping her wrist, a strap was attached from her phone to her arm.


    "Oh, what a cute parrot," Jenny said pointing to the dangling macaw figuring attached.


    "Yeah. I got it on my trip to the beach."


    "You went to the beach?"


    "Yeah, last Saturday."


    "Oh cool. Did your dad take you?"


    "No. I went with a friend."


    Jenny gave Lucy a smirk. "Oh, which friend?"


    "Nobody in particular."


    "It wouldn''t happen to be someone... special, would it?"


    "Jenny..."


    ¡°I''m just kidding, okay? If you don''t want to tell me about your boyfriend, that''s fine."


    Lucy groaned. ''I should have never said anything. Me and my big mouth. But the cat''s out of the bag. She knows, so maybe...'' Lucy requested to talk in a more secluded area, which Jenny obliged. Upon arriving at the back of the main building, Lucy exhaled deeply.


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    "Oh, this is gonna be good," Jenny said excitedly, prompting a look of disapproval from Lucy. "Sorry. Tell me, what''s going on?"


    "Alright, here it is. I''m not going to pretend anymore.¡± She took another deep breath, ¡°I like Johan, but he''s afraid of being with me."


    "But why?"


    "He''s an adult and I''m still just a kid. When we went to the beach, I could see he wasn''t too comfortable hanging out with me. I really like him, but can we even be together? Is it even allowed?"


    "Why not?" Jenny responded, surprising Lucy with her short answer. "If you like him, tell him."


    "I can''t just tell him. He''s already so nervous to begin with."


    "Nervous? I thought he was a man. Adults don''t get nervous."


    "Johan is quite sensitive, which is why I don''t want to push anything on him. Except I kind of did on Saturday. I just blurted out ''let''s go to the beach'' and he took me, even though he was so uncomfortable. I feel bad now, especially since it rained in the end and we got soaked."


    "You really like this guy, don''t you?"


    "Yeah... I do."


    "Does he like you back?"


    "I don''t know."


    "I think he likes you."


    "What makes you think that?"


    "Come on, Lucy. This is me we''re talking about. I''m kind of an expert on these things."


    "You don''t even know him."


    "That''s right, I don''t. So why don''t you introduce me to him."


    "No, I don''t think so."


    "Are you afraid he''s going to pick me over you?"


    "Knock it off. Besides, you have a boyfriend already."


    "Oh, don''t even talk about him today."


    "Did you have another fight?"


    "Yeah, we''re still fighting. He refuses to acknowledge me as his girlfriend in front of his friends. I''m getting tired of him constantly telling me he''s tired of me telling him and to stop telling him to tell his friends about us but no, he just won''t listen, even though I told my friends that I had a boyfriend and I''m even respecting his wishes to not tell them who it is but my friends keep insisting I tell them who it is so I''m getting kind of tired of playing around with them so I told him that if he doesn''t tell his friends I''m going to tell them and then he threatened to break up with me and then I told him I was going to break up with him first and then we started yelling at each other and..." Jenny would have continued had Lucy not begin to chuckle. "Why are you laughing?"


    "You''re like the opposite of me. You want all the attention that comes with a boyfriend, don''t you?"


    "I said I didn''t want to talk about him. Why do you think I want to talk about him now?"


    "Jenny, you''re silly."


    "What does that mean?"


    "It''s obvious you''re doing this for attention."


    "Will you stop it already?"


    "Then you don''t like him anymore?"


    "I didn''t say that either."


    "Are you thinking of breaking up with him?"


    "Uhh... well... I''m giving him a second chance, and I''m sure he''ll do the right thing."


    Lucy patted Jenny''s shoulder, "Don''t rush him. He''s just embarrassed to admit to his friends he has a girlfriend. They''ll probably make fun of him or something like that."


    "Yeah, well I told my friends-"


    "Those are your friends, not his. Give him time. Besides, if you really do like him, then what does it matter if the whole world doesn''t know about it? As I said, you sound like you just want a boyfriend to show off."


    "No, that''s not it. Kind of."


    "Then just be happy together, even if nobody else knows. Besides, I''m sure you don''t want your parents to find out, right?"


    "My mom is fine with it."


    ¡°She is? Oh, yeah, your mom. I figured she would.¡±


    The bell rang and both parted ways. "I''m not giving up on this, Lucy."


    "Just be patient, Jenny."


    "Fine, whatever. I''ll see you later."


    As the two go off to their respective classes, Lucy thought, ''Patience, huh?''

 Chapter 40

    Johan parted the curtains to see the blue skies before him. The clouds had parted to make way for the sun to dry the world as the puddles evaporated into the sky. He sighed before saying, ¡°I better get to class,¡± and stepped out of the room.


    "Morning, Wendy," he announced but the only acknowledgment he got is a look of perturbance. "Did you make breakfast? I thought you wanted me to be in charge of it from now on."


    "How about we just make our own meals from here on?" Wendy responded.


    "Okay. I guess I''ll make myself something to eat then."


    He proceeded to the kitchen and rummaged the fridge. "I don''t know what I want right now. What did you make? Maybe I''ll make something similar. I promise I won''t try to outshine you." No response from Wendy, simply continuing to stare. "I''m only joking, Wendy."


    "Johan, are you having a mental breakdown?"


    "I beg your pardon?"


    "I''m not sure what''s going on with you, Johan, but clearly this is not healthy, and I don''t think this is merely stress from mid-terms, especially since they''re over with."


    "Yeah, I was a bit stressed, wasn''t I? But now things are going to be okay."


    "You said that before and nearly lost your mind. I don''t get you anymore. You''re like a completely different person."


    "Are you saying I''m not predictable anymore?"


    "In a way, kind of, but that''s not what I meant."


    "Well, things are changing now. Things can''t stay the same forever. We''re adults now, living on our own. We are still going to school just like before, but this is college not high school. Our parents aren''t here to comfort us. We have to live by our own means now."


    "Is that really it? Are you just afraid of growing up?"


    Johan closed the refrigerator door, "I think I''ll just buy something on the way to school. I''ll see you later."


    He grabbed his bag and headed for the door. "Wait, Johan," Wendy called him and approached him. "If you want to talk, I''m here for you. No matter what it is, you can tell me anything."


    Johan smiled back and said, "No, Wendy, there''s no need," and headed out.


    Entering the garage, ''Wendy''s been jumpy for some time. Maybe I have been acting crazy in front of her. In fact, I''ve said some things I regret now. I wonder what I can do to make up for it.''


    Once he entered his car, he exited the garage and rode it up to the sidewalk.


    He looked to his left, all clear.


    He looked to his right, no car incoming.


    He looked to his left once more and is taken aback for a second before uttering, "Margaret?" who was right in front of the driver side window waving at him. She was speaking but all he could hear was a muffled voice.


    Cracking the window a bit, "Johan, what a coincidence to run into you."


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    "Coincidence?"


    "I was just taking a walk and you appear before me."


    "Yeah, sure..."


    Margaret stood by, smiling, clasping her hands together. "You know, it rained yesterday. Lots of water everywhere. Puddles on the corners and all that. Why, a girl can slip and fall if she''s not careful, especially when she''s wearing high heels. Quite expensive high heels. It would be a shame to have them ruin due to the muck around here."


    Johan sighed, "What the heck. I''m in a good mood today." Hearing the passenger side door unlock, Margaret gleefully walks around the hood of the car and enters the vehicle. With the door closed, Johan once again checked both sides before entering the street proper.


    "You''re a real rebel,¡± Margaret commented.


    "I just don''t want to be in a fatal accident... again."


    "Oh, I''m sorry. I forgot."


    "It''s okay. That was my fault, anyway. I wasn''t paying attention to the road at the time. I''m going to be careful from here on. I have a lot to live for, after all."


    "Wow, you seem to be in a real good mood."


    "I sure am."


    "This is good news. Wendy was telling me you were going through a mental breakdown."


    Johan cleared his throat. "So I heard. I admit, I was quite perturbed earlier, as if the world was coming to an end, but I finally settled my mental anguish. From here forward, all is well."


    "I''m so glad for you, Johan. You''ve really pulled yourself together."


    "Well, there''s no time to be sulking when there are things to do."


    "So who is it?"


    "Who? Well... uhh... huh?"


    "Who is it?"


    "What do you mean?"


    "Whose the lucky girl?"


    "What lucky girl?"


    "The lucky girl who you fell in love with."


    "What!?" Johan turned his head showing her his face full of shock as she gleefully smiled. Returning his attention back to the road. "Margaret, what are you saying?"


    "Are you still denying it?"


    "Denying what? What are you talking about all of a sudden?"


    "Johan, the writing''s on the wall. Your irrational behavior, calling out a girl named Lucy, getting depressed after hearing her name when you claimed you couldn''t be with her, and now you''re all happy about life. You overcame everything and ended up with this Lucy girl, didn''t you?"


    "No, that''s not it. Not at all."


    "Then tell me, why are you so happy? Why the good mood?"


    "Can''t a man be happy for any reason other than a woman?"


    "Of course not, especially you. You were completely destroyed and now you''re one thousand percent better. If it isn''t a woman, then why are you so happy now?"


    "I can assure you it''s not because of a woman."


    ¡°What a terrible thing to say.¡±


    ¡°You know what I mean.¡±


    "Do I? Come on, what made you so happy today when you were so miserable earlier if it wasn''t a woman?"


    "I''m just happy, that''s all. People can be happy just being themselves."


    "And what about Lucy?"


    "Listen, the name Lucy could mean anything within the context you heard that name, okay? You''re just assuming it''s a woman."


    "I''m aware that''s the excuse you keep using. You kept saying she''s a fictional character."


    "I''m not even saying that anymore."


    "That''s a lie. No man would act the way you did after hearing the name of the woman they loved but couldn''t be with."


    "It doesn''t necessarily have to be a woman now, would it?"


    ¡°So a man?¡±


    ¡°Absolutely not.¡±


    "So is Lucy a dog?"


    "A dog!?"


    "Yes. A dog. Is Lucy a dog? Is she a pet you want but are not allowed to have?"


    "Knock it off."


    "I get it now. You want this doggy so much but the landlord won''t let you have it and now you''re so anguished that you can''t have your poor little Lucy run up to you when you get home."


    "Stop it!"


    "No slippers from your loyal Lucy now."


    "I said knock it off!"


    "Aw, poor Little Johan, can''t adopt little Lucy from the pet shop."


    "Will you knock it off and stop calling her a dog!?"


    "Why are you getting so worked up then? She''s only a dog, right? A FEMALE dog!"


    The car swerved into a parking spot as fast as Margaret''s head swayed. It was so sudden that Margaret had to hold on to the dashboard as the car came to a complete stop.


    "Get out," ordered Johan.


    Without protest, Margaret opened the door and exited the vehicle. "What are you going to do about it?" she taunted as she slammed the door and went on her way.


    A disturbing heat was leading to a sensation of rage as Johan stewed on his car, clenching the steering wheel. Breathing heavily, he calmly shifted to drive before pulling out and continuing down the road.


    "Margaret, you idiot, what do you know! I''m not in love. I''m over that, you know? That was just a dream. It''s just a dream. I''m not reincarnated or anything like that. That''s just a fairy tale. Besides, she''s ten years younger than me. She''s still just a kid. That''s gross. That''s disgusting. Vile. Putrid." His attempts to calm himself further was in vain as a disturbing feeling overcame him. Having no choice, he parked his car once again and banged the steering wheel with his fist a few times. "She''s a young teenager. She''s only a kid. She''s nobody to me. She''s practically a stranger. She''s... she''s... she''s..." He raised his head to hit the steering wheel with his forehead. "She''s... the love of my life."

 Chapter 41

    (Content warning: the following chapter contains strong language and suggestive themes.)


    "Who am I kidding?" Johan said to himself. "I haven''t gotten over this, and that last outing probably made things worse. I''m not happy at all, in fact, I feel even more miserable. There''s only one thing that makes me feel better, and it''s her." Reclining his chair, he closed his eyes. "I can''t keep going on with this charade. Wendy already thinks I''ve gone insane, and Margaret is probably heading towards the same conclusion. I got to get this settled somehow." A waft of air escapes from his lungs as he pulled up his seat and opened his eyes. "This has gone on for too long. I need to talk to someone about this. I got no choice but to seek professional help."


    "I told Johan to contact me on Saturday when he got home but he never did,¡± Lucy said to Jenny as they were having lunch. ¡°I know it hasn''t been long, but I was hoping we could talk about what we did and maybe, you know, hang out again some other time."


    "You really do like him, don''t you?"


    "Yeah, I do, but looks like he''s made up his mind. I guess this really is the end."


    "I don''t think that''s fair. I think he''s being a jerk."


    "He''s just afraid of being seen with a girl my age. He''s an adult, after all. Besides, he never really said he liked me. He could''ve just been nice all this time."


    "Then you should tell him how you feel. I mean, you look so sad. Call him right now. Who cares what he''s doing. You gotta tell him."


    "He got a new phone, and I didn''t have a chance to get it from him. Besides, I never got his old number either, and I''m not even sure if he''s ever going back on Google Chat. He''s made it clear before that he doesn''t want to be with me and I think this time he means it. I may never talk to him ever again."


    "You can''t let it end like this."


    "What choice do I-"


    "You can''t let it end like this!"


    "Why are you getting so worked up? This isn''t about you."


    "Because this is wrong! He took you on a date and then he ditched you. That''s messed up. He shouldn''t be doing that, especially since he''s an adult."


    "We didn''t go out on a date, we just hanged out. And you''re right, he is an adult and that''s the reason why he doesn''t want to see me in the first place."


    "This is so messed up. He''s making you cry and feel lonely while he''s probably already looking for another young girl to take advantage of."


    "He wouldn''t do that!"


    "How do you know? Huh? He found you online and took you out on a date, and now he''s refusing to call you after you gave him the best night of his life."


    "That''s not how it went. I don''t even know what you''re thinking. I''m the one who asked to meet him, I''m the one who asked to go to the beach. It was all me. And I don''t think he''s going to be interested in any other girl. I mean, the dream..."


    "Dream?"


    "I''ve been having these dreams for as long as I can remember. Dreams of a man falling in love with a girl. I just had one last night, and as always, in ended in both of us dying. Always dreaming of a couple who are desperately trying to be together, but it can never be."


    "Oh, that. I don''t get that but if what you say is true, then you need to contact him and tell him how you feel. You can''t just let him do this to you."


    "Well... I do know his email."


    "Yeah, send him an email. Tell him how he''s made you sad after your date and demand another one, or else you''ll call the cops and have him arrested for sexual harassment."


    "He didn''t do anything like that to me."


    "It doesn''t matter. Just scare him a bit. Let him know who the boss of this relationship is. And make sure you introduce me to him. I''ll beat him up for making you cry."


    Lucy''s despondent state was replaced with a humorous feeling as she started laughing. Seeing her friend''s mood lighten, Jenny also joined in the laughter.


    "Thanks Jenny. And you are right, I can''t let it end like this. I want to tell him my true feelings. If we have to end this, I want to end it right."


    "And give him a piece of your mind."


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    "Yeah, and give him a piece of my mind too."


    --


    After Johan finally got the courage to make the call, a woman''s voice was heard from the other end, ¡°Hello?¡±


    ¡°Hi. Is this Dr. Shabree Lawls?¡±


    ¡°Sure is. What do you need help with?¡±


    ¡°I saw your videos on TikTok and I really need to talk to someone about a big issue I''m having.¡±


    ¡°Yeah, no problem. So, tell me, what''s going on?¡±


    ¡°Before that, I must ask, this is confidential, right? I don''t want people finding out about this.¡±


    ¡°Hey, no worries. So long as you have not committed a crime, it can be between us.¡±


    ¡°A crime? What do you mean?¡±


    ¡°Yeah, like, I have to report you to the police if you committed a crime.¡±


    ¡°That does not bode well with me.¡±


    ¡°You committed a crime?¡±


    ¡°No, not necessarily.¡±


    ¡°What you mean ''not necessarily?'' If you didn''t, you wouldn''t have anything to hide.¡±


    ¡°It''s not as simple as that. I mean, what if a situation could be construed as a crime?¡±


    ¡°I need to know what is going on before I can assess that.¡±


    ¡°And what if you determined that I did commit a crime.¡±


    ¡°Do you think you committed a crime?¡±


    ¡°No, but you know how people are. Besides, who knows how anyone can interpret anything.¡±


    ¡°Look, you can trust me. I''m a professional whose helping plenty of men just like you with their problems. Most of my clientele are men, after all.¡±


    ¡°Really? So can you help me?¡±


    ¡°Of course. Just let me know and I''ll see how I can help you.¡±


    ¡°Alright, fine. Here''s the situation. I went out with a girl last weekend. We had a great time, but I feel so guilty. I mean, I have strong feelings for her but... I''m not supposed to be with her, like, at all.¡±


    ¡°I see. So from what I understand, you sexually harassed her.¡±


    ¡°What?¡±


    ¡°I know, it is very shameful, and you should be ashamed of yourself, rightfully so, but we can work through this. The first thing you must do is to admit your wrongdoing by being born male.¡±


    ¡°What is this? I didn''t do anything of the kind.¡±


    ¡°So you don''t identify as a black male?¡±


    ¡°No, I don''t. What does that... I meant that I didn''t harass anybody, that''s what I''m referring to.¡±


    ¡°Impossible. A man automatically sexually harasses a girl by being in their presence. This is a given, no contest.¡±


    ¡°That sounds ridiculous.¡±


    ¡°Hey, don''t talk back to me. Remember, I am a professional therapist. I''ve been doing this for a few months now. I think I know more about relationships than you do. After all, you wouldn''t be calling me if you knew all the answers. That''s the problem with you men, always acting on your impulses before thinking.¡±


    ¡°Yeah, you''re right. I wouldn''t be calling if that was the case. I''m sorry.¡±


    ¡°Apology expected. Now, continue please.¡±


    ¡°Okay, listen. I don''t know how to say this but, well, this girl is younger than me.¡±


    ¡°Younger? Whatchu mean? You sound quite young yourself.¡±


    ¡°Yeah. I''m in college. And this girl... well... she''s a minor.¡±


    ¡°Whoa, hold on there, sirens blaring everywhere, red flags popping up. She''s a minor?¡±


    ¡°Listen, I haven''t done anything. I just hanged out with her.¡±


    ¡°Hey, now, calm down. I told you, okay, you''re a man. This is expected. However, this is the first time I''ve dealt with someone dating someone still in high school. That''s sick and disgusting, but you are a man after all so that''s a given.¡±


    ¡°Wait a minute, you''re just assuming things now. Let me tell you my side of the story.¡±


    ¡°That you are a sexual predator chasing after children? Yeah, I got that.¡±


    ¡°No. I''m not a predator.¡±


    ¡°You just confessed you were a predator. Don''t try to deny it, I got it all recorded and have your phone number. There''s no way out of this now. Now tell me, what is your name?¡±


    ¡°My name? Uhh... Robert.¡±


    ¡°Robert... what?¡±


    ¡°Listen, I''m having serious issues with this, and I thought you could help me. I''m not preying on kids. I''m just confused.¡±


    ¡°I told you that you can''t weasel your way out of this. You''re a predator in denial and it''s my job as a proud black woman of the community to see that justice is served and rehabilitate you. What''s your address?¡±


    ¡°You''re not helping me at all! You''re just accusing me of things I''ve never done.¡±


    ¡°You just said you lured a girl to your car and then you took her to your place and had your sick disgusting fun with her. Don''t deny it, it''s all recorded. Its your word against mine, a successful black LGBTQ+ Ally Female identifying bootylicious therapist Pronouns She/Her.¡±


    ¡°You''re just some crazy person trying to steal my information. This must be a scam.¡±


    ¡°I''ll have you know that I happen to have a degree in female studies, liberal arts, and gender ideology. I am more than qualified to be a therapist.¡±


    ¡°I don''t know who you are but you''re a terrible person and I should have never contacted you.¡±


    ¡°Is that how you''re going to act, like a little bitch? Hear yourself, sounding all high and mighty while hanging outside the elementary school trying to pick up literal babies. I am a proud beautiful black bitch with her own firm. Let the haters hate. I''m a proud feminist who hustled to be where I am today. You see this, huh, huh. You see this, yet you want little babies instead?¡± Confusion was running through Johan''s mind as he could not discern neither what she was referring to nor understand the slapping sounds coming from his phone. ¡°Oh wait, this is a phone call. My bad, but you can see what I mean in my Tiktok and Only Fans profile. Look up my profile @unusuallybree on the former and ChaoticBreeSluttyHoe4Ever on the latter.¡±


    ¡°You really are crazy.¡±


    ¡°Crazy? Oh, we gonna add racist to that list of problems you have.¡±


    ¡°No, I''m serious. You really are crazy! I called you for help and you''re going on a non-sequitur.¡±


    ¡°And yet here you are, being a man, calling me all sorts of names, being sexist, I bet you''re the one who told my former employer about my escapades as a successful independent black woman who just wants to have her fun with forty guys on the weekend and upload it to PornHub. That''s nobody''s business but to my fans. Well, this former stripper now plus-sized model of a therapist will not stand for this.¡±


    ¡°This was a mistake. I can''t believe I was about to divulge everything to a complete chaotic stranger. You''re the worst.¡±


    ¡°Oh, is that how''s it''s going to be? Using that language knowing you touched a whole lot of kids. You''re the disgusting monster here! Now, you better get your ass in here in my office so that the police can come and take you away to protect all the little children from your predatory ways. Also, I need to give you your medication.¡±


    ¡°Medication?¡±


    ¡°I need to give you these pills that will deteriorate your genitals.¡±


    ¡°I beg your pardon?¡±


    ¡°Don''t you cuss at me, you fucking piece of shit! I give these to all my male patients, and you are going to take double the dosage! This is for your own good! And I''m going to suggest gender reassignment surgery as well. Being a trans woman will definitely cure you from this vile disease.¡±


    ¡°I''m not going anywhere. I''m hanging up and I never want to hear from you ever again.¡±


    ¡°Don''t you dare talk to me like that you-¡± Johan hanged up before any more words got through.


    ¡°Good thing I used a burner number.¡±

 Chapter 42

    She sighed as she leaned back on her chair while looking her phone. ''It was so much easier on Google Chat. I wish I could just tell him what I feel there, but he probably will never install it ever again. This email is the only way I can talk to him. Unless he blocked me.'' Thinking about this for a moment, she was compelled to sit straight up. ''Isn''t that too much, Johan? To go as far as to block me? I mean, I can understand if you never want to speak to me again, but to block me? That''s too much.''


    She clenched her fist but relaxed her hand after a moment of clarification. ''What am I thinking? Johan wouldn''t do that at all. He would never go so far as to block me. But it''s still possible. He was very adamant about not seeing me anymore. I wish there was some way I could find out.''


    Her fingers hovered over her keyboard as the cursor on her screen continued to blink. One finger after another, words were beginning to form in front of her and after a minute of typing, she clicked send. ''Gmail and Google Chat use the same profile. If this email goes through, then that means he didn''t block me, at least I think. The message should be innocent enough that he won''t actually block me if that is the case. I really need to tell him my feelings, I can''t just let this end like this. Johan, please, talk to me one more time before you go.''


    --


    ''The world truly is against me,'' Johan thought as he sat on a park bench. ''I really am lost. Who can I turn to now? I have nobody who will listen to me. There was only one person I could turn to, but...'' He reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone. ''Lucy... we had a good time last Saturday, didn''t we? It felt like an eternity since I felt that happy. But that will be the last time I can truly be happy. Forgive me, Lucy.''


    Staring as the solemn reflection on his phone''s screen, he was interrupted by the phone turning on, notifying him of a message. He only needed to read the name before he quickly put it away. ''I forgot. She knew my email. Oh no, what do I do? Do I block her? Do I just throw away the message? Well, whatever decision I make, I have to look at the message eventually. I might as well.''


    When he opened the message, Johan, we had a good time last Saturday, didn''t we?


    He didn''t notice his fingers loosening until the phone began slipping. Just as the phone escaped his grasped, his other hand rescued it from having to buy another one.


    His attention turned to his surroundings, checking every direction. ''She''s not here. But... how...?''


    Confirming she was nowhere near, he continued to read the message. It felt like an eternity since I felt this happy.


    Johan got to his feet to survey his surroundings one more time. ''Is she spying on me right now? Because this isn''t funny.''


    Seeing as she wasn''t going to appear before him and this was no prank, he continued reading, I hope we can do it again sometime soon. Get in touch with me, please. -Lucy


    When he finished the message, he exhaled and sat down. ''Didn''t I make it clear I can''t see her again? I can''t even remember if I actually mentioned it. Was I lost in this fantasy that whisked me away from the cruel nightmare I live now? Because I need to wake up and face reality. This is not going to happen, not in a million years. But what can I say that won''t destroy me in the end? She''s the only thing I have left and here I am trying to get rid of her... because I have to.'' He straightened himself up and took a deep breath. ''But I have t, nonetheless. Everyone is telling me this is the right thing to do. I can''t be hanging out with a kid her age with these emotions. I have to do the right thing.''


    Emotions were brewing within him, forcing him to suppress them with all his will. The message from the one he wanted to hear from again, and the one he wanted to forget, was sending mixed signals to his brain. The option to delete the message was waiting for him but the reply button was also beckoning.


    Out of instinct, or perhaps to clear his mind from his turmoil, he looked around his surroundings and that was when he saw a familiar face a few yards away. ''Oh no. What is Margaret doing here? After what happened this morning, she''s the last person I wanted to see.''


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    He got up, turned around, and started walking away. ''Why did she have to bring her up when I was so happy. What made you think it was okay to just assume I was happy because I was in love. No, Margaret. I''m unhappy because I am in love. Being in love with a person I can''t be with is complete and utter misery. And what was that, asking me what I''m going to do about it? Why did you say that? Are you mocking me? And how dare you say Lucy is a dog, that''s a terrible thing to say to anyone. She''s the sweetest most honest girl you can find. She''s an intelligent and beautiful person. You would never understand what I''m going through. The only thing that could truly make me happy is to be with...'' He halted in place, his eyes closed, his will power continuing to keep his emotions at bay as he clenched his phone tightly on his hand. ''Why is this so hard to let go? Why can''t I move on from this? Why do I have to suffer so much? What exactly am I supposed to do? I can''t keep going on like this. There''s got to be something I can do.''


    Taking a deep breath, he turned around and set his path toward hers.


    "Hey, Johan,¡± Margaret welcomed him when he arrived. ¡°Ditching classes? Never expected that from you.¡±


    "Margaret, about what happened in the car..."


    "Oh, I hope I didn''t offend you. I just like teasing people from time to time."


    "In that case, can you tell me something. What does it mean to fall in love?"


    The question left an impression on Margaret, one of amusement, as she laughed, "I have no idea."


    "You don''t?"


    "I''m sorry but I don''t have the answer."


    "But you seemed so sure in the car."


    "I can tell when others are in love."


    "Because you''ve fallen in love, right?"


    "Have I?"


    "You haven''t?"


    "Probably, and if I did, I might have taken it for granted." Taking her hand, she starts stroking Johan''s chest, "And maybe I''m taking it for granted right now."


    "Margaret... about Lucy."


    "Oh yeah, the winner. The one with the ultimate prize."


    "Prize? What do you mean?"


    "You really are oblivious. Johan, you''re one of the most popular guys on campus. Many women are dying to be your girlfriend, or even just to go out with you once, but you turn them all away."


    "I have?"


    "You haven''t?"


    "I don''t believe anyone has ever asked me out except for you."


    "Are you really saying that nobody has ever asked you out?"


    "Not once."


    "But they kept telling me they''ve try to hit on you and it didn''t work."


    "Hit me? Did I offend them that much?"


    "No, not violence. They''ve tried to get your attention. You know, flirting."


    "Flirting? What are you talking about?"


    "Have you ever had any girl come up to you and, like, say something nice about what you were wearing at the time? Or maybe to help them with their studying? Or even invited you to go out for coffee?"


    "Yes, plenty of times."


    "And what was your response?"


    "Well, it depended if the circumstances allowed me."


    "That was what you used to reject them for a date?"


    "What date? They just wanted to go for a coffee, or go to a movie, or even just talk to me. I get these a lot."


    "And you turn all that down under the presumption that you were busy?"


    "Well, I am a college student. I have a lot of studying to do."


    "Oh my gosh, you''re such a nerd."


    "Huh?"


    She couldn''t control herself as her chuckles transformed into laughter further confusing Johan. "Who would''ve thought that one of the most handsome men in campus is a nerd who would rather dig his nose into books. I guess not all nerds have thick glasses and pimples on their face."


    "What are you going on about? You''re confusing me."


    "I bet you are. Listen here, my dense friend, you have constantly been approached by a whole bunch of women and you have unknowingly turned them all down because you would rather study. That makes you a nerd, simple as that."


    "You make that sound like its a bad thing."


    Margaret let out anther fit of laughter before answering, "Johan, you''re something else. Some women like that, at least I do. But I guess to the winner go the spoils. I don''t know what Lucy did but she figured you out. She has my congratulations."


    "Margaret, who do you think Lucy is?"


    "Who?"


    "Who do you think Lucy really is?"


    "Your girlfriend."


    Johan''s mind was lost as that word had given him a strange sensation within his person that it pulled him away from reality for a moment. "My girlfriend?"


    "HA HA HA! You really are a nerd. Now it''s time to be a man."


    "A man?"


    "Tell her you are in love with her."


    "You want me to what?"


    "Confess that you are in love with her, call her your girlfriend." She leaned in close, "Kiss her on the lips," and backed away. "I know its awkward for a nerd, but trust me, if you want to be a man, you got to do all that."


    "No, I can''t do that. Not with her."


    "Fight, Johan. Fight for Lucy. Forget about your insecurities."


    "I can''t. I''m not allowed to be with her."


    "Again with that. Knock it off with the make believe and forget what everyone else thinks. If you love Lucy, go and get her, okay? Stop being a nerd and be a man already."


    "Margaret, do you remember that time at the car, and that ''friend'' that I have."


    Margaret''s bravado was now replaced with one of fear and disgust. "That creep! Ew! You''re still friends with him?"


    "Listen, I want to talk to you about him."


    "No. You get rid of that guy. I told you this."


    "Please. I want to talk about-"


    "No, no, no, no, no! I don''t want to hear it."


    "Margaret, just listen to me."


    Before he could get another word out, she turned around and scurried out of the scene. But before she left his sight, "Trust in yourself, Johan. You''re no longer a kid. It''s time to be a man," and took her leave.

 Chapter 43

    Before they could figure out what just transpired, Johan exited the room and with the same determination, approached them again. "Wendy..." he said.


    "Yeah," they respond.


    "I... uh... " He cleared his throat. "I... I... I''ll be right back," and returned to his room.


    Within his room, "I have to say something. I can''t just be silent about this."


    "Silent about what?"


    "Ah!" Johan took a step back.


    "Something on your mind?"


    "No, I''m fine. I''m really, really, really fine."


    "Are you sure?"


    "Of course." He replied while scratching his ear.


    "So, what is it you want to talk to me about?"


    Johan put his hand down. "Alright, fine. Sit on the couch, I''ll join you."


    Both return to the living with Wendy taking their seat on the couch. "Tell me, what is going on?"


    "Fine,¡± he said as he sat next to them. ¡°I''ll just get down to it. I got a message from that girl I hanged out with on Saturday."


    "Uh-huh."


    "The thing is, I have to tell her I can''t see her anymore. I thought I did that last Saturday, but I can''t remember if I did or not. That was supposed to be my goodbye but apparently, she''s looking forward to another day out."


    "I see. And who is this girl exactly?"


    "That''s what I need to talk to you about as well."


    "So what exactly do you want to talk to me about then?"


    "I don''t know what to do about this girl because I''m dying here. On one hand, I really like her and I want to be with her. I really don''t see what the big deal is. I''m not doing anything inappropriate. But on the other hand, people are going to get the wrong idea, and I don''t think this is allowed anyway." He got up to his feet. "This is driving me crazy. I have no idea what to answer, because if I reject her, I fear I''ll throw away the last thing I have left. On the other hand, the longer I continue this, the more trouble I''m going to end up getting into. I feel that I''m surrounded by enemies all around me and that they''ll destroy me if I don''t give in to their whims. What am I supposed to do?"


    Wendy got up to join him, "Johan, I don''t know what to say. I have no idea what happened to you as of late to make you act this way, but if there''s anything you want to say, you might as well just say it, so say it."


    "I already said what I had to say."


    "That''s the thing, you haven''t. You haven''t said anything. I don''t know what you are talking about. Is this some weird coping mechanism for whatever it is you are going through?"


    "No. I''m having trouble and I wanted to talk to someone about it."


    "And I have no idea what you''re saying. I can''t interpret what you could possibly be trying to tell me."


    Johan released a frustrating groan, "Can''t you just answer what I asked?"


    "Whatever symbolism this is, I don''t get it. I mean, is this person even real?"


    "Yes."


    "Then who is it?"


    "A girl."


    "Be more elaborate. What girl?"


    "Just a girl. That''s it."


    "What are her hobbies? Is she a freshman or a senior? Is she even going to college? Did she graduate? Is she working? How did you meet her?"


    "I can''t answer those."


    "You can''t answer them, huh? Then I don''t know how to help you."


    Johan thought for a moment before replying, "I guess... you really can''t."


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    A despondent look was upon him, an ambiance of defeat could be felt in the air. Wendy placed their hand on his shoulder, "Johan, just tell me. You don''t approve do you? You don''t approve of me, right?"


    "What? That again?"


    "Ever since that day in high school, everything changed. I lost a lot of friends, and my parents won''t talk to me. You''ve been there for me, being supportive of me, but I have noticed that you have been kind of distant too. Are you just saying you support me just to be nice?"


    "No. I don''t disapprove of you."


    Wendy released their hand and turned around, "Yeah, sure."


    "I really I don''t care who you are."


    "It''s as clear as day, it''s not a secret. I''d rather you''d be honest. You know, I don''t care what people say about me. I don''t care that some people make fun of me and call me names, say derogatory slurs. You know the kind, right? But the irony is that I wish you were honest with me. Your fake support is not what I want, I want the truth, alright? I promise, I won''t get mad, I won''t get angry. If you don''t like me because of this, that''s okay. It''s okay, okay?"


    "Wendy, stop talking crazy. I''m not going to say anything terrible about you."


    "But your support doesn''t sound convincing either. It''s like you''re forcing yourself."


    "Forcing myself?"


    "Not so much your words, but more your body language. I can sense that... somethings making you uncomfortable."


    The disapproval was vivid in their voice, a disturbing sensation that was brewing inside of them being let out. It was as if Johan was watching his former friend continuing to disappear before his eyes. "Then tell me, do you believe you are different than other people?" he asked.


    "Yeah, I do."


    "How does that make you feel?"


    Wendy thought for a moment before responding, "I sometimes get ridiculed, and I sometimes get support. Both seem to be equally said to me. I have learned to tolerate the negativity and focus on the positive. That''s how I deal with it."


    "But why? Why do you put up with the negativity?"


    "Because I''m a human being, you know? You shouldn''t be judged based on stereotypes and presumptions. I breathe and talk and laugh like anybody else. So what if I''m different than everyone else. I should be treated the same as everyone else because I am like everyone else. There''s no point in me fighting it. Some people are just fools, so let them be fools."


    ¡°But you just said you felt different.¡±


    ¡°I am different, but that doesn''t mean I should be treated as such.¡±


    ¡°How can come to such simple conclusions? The world isn''t as simple as that.¡±


    ¡°That''s the problem with everyone. Everyone wants to complicate everything. Everything is about logistics.¡±


    ¡°What do you mean logistics?¡±


    ¡°Every rule has to have more rules underneath it. You have to act this way if you''re this, you have to act that way if you''re that. I''m getting sick of it. I just want to be me, you know. Why judge me on technicalities that people don''t even understand themselves?¡±


    Looking at Wendy with a piercing look, Johan asked, "And what about you?"


    "I''m sorry?"


    "Do you judge people before you get to know them?"


    "No, of course not."


    "Do you judge people who you''ve known for a long time?"


    "Even less."


    "I see. So you never once assumed anything about anybody?"


    "I don''t think so. Maybe once or twice I''ve thought about somebody in a certain way, but I''d like to think I see the best in people."


    There was smugness emanating from Wendy while a look of dissatisfaction was showcased on Johan''s face as he replied, "Real funny, Edwin."


    "What? What are you on about?"


    "So you don''t judge, huh? Really?"


    "What are you doing? You''re confusing me."


    "And you want to be treated like everyone else."


    "Yeah, who wouldn''t."


    "Oh, but of course, of course. You would never judge a person behind their back. Oh no."


    "Johan, what are you trying to tell me?"


    Johan walked past Wendy and headed to his room, but before he entered, "Edwin, I think it''s time we grew up. This isn''t high school anymore. We''re in the real world now, and the real world is nasty and disgusting!"


    He shut the door and locked it before he lied on his bed. ''What do you know? You don''t know anything. You''re too comfortable that every single little thing hurts your stupid little feelings. Try walking in my shoes. I can''t believe I was even considering telling you.'' After a few moments of stewing, he rested his arm on his eyes. ''No. I''m just taking out my frustrations on him. My friend. My former best friend. I used to talk to you about anything. Well, almost anything. Now, I have nothing. No friends, no family, no girlfriend... Girlfriend?''


    A small shock to his body caused him to sit straight up. A strange sensation that was neither malevolent nor comforting was upon him. ''I really am alone, aren''t I? But is that a bad thing? Maybe my problem is that I''m concerning myself with those around me. Margaret is right, worrying about what everyone else thinks of me is the cause of my misery. I have to be nice to people I don''t like, dressing up and grooming myself to attract people I could care less about. Why do I even wear these clothes?''


    He got up to his feet and looked at himself in the mirror. ''I buy them for myself because I like these clothes. In fact, everything I do, I don''t do for anyone, at least not anymore, especially since they all left me. That has to be my problem. I''m trying to please a world that despises me. A fool''s errand. If they hate me so much, why am I even trying? Saying they care about me only to ditch me in the end. Telling me to my face they won''t judge me, and then doing that very thing behind my back. I''m sick of of all this!'' He headed toward the window to stare at the world. ''I think I will quit college and live somewhere remote where I don''t have to deal with anyone. I''ll live all by myself and then I won''t have to deal with this pain. I can finally be myself and not care what anybody thinks. My only companions will be my novels. I can be whoever I want to be in my own world. I don''t need the one I was handed.''


    As a great elated feeling enveloped within him, he felt a nudge on his shoulder.


    He turned around, ¡°Edwin, please, will you-¡± but nobody was present. Instead, his eyes immediately dart toward his phone sitting on the bed.


    ''I''m certain I didn''t make it clear then, but now that I have this ambition, it''s finally time to end this. I''ll accept her next invitation and then tell her that it''s over, that we can''t hang out anymore. Sorry, Lucy but I got to do this. It''s best for both of us. I''m still a gentleman so I''ll give you one last outing, but you won''t see me anymore after this. This is the last time we meet."


    --


    "Okay, I think I finally know what to say," Lucy said as she cracked her knuckles. "I can''t believe it took a few hours to think of a response, but I finally know what to tell Johan. Now I got to put it into words to let him know how I feel."


    With a sense of determination, she opened Gmail and was surprised to find her last message was responded to. A bit of hesitation was going through her but at the same time anticipation. "At least he didn''t block me," she said before clicking the message.


    ''How about we hang out again this Saturday?

 Chapter 44

    He walked over to his desk and picked up a notebook. ''To think I spent all night writing notes on the matter. I really am a nerd. Forget all this,'' and flings them back. ''Just tell her how you feel and let her know that this is it, this is our last outing. Perhaps a hike to the mountains will soften the blow. It''s the least I can do, and it''s free. I''m not going to spend any more money on her, that''s why I told her to pack a lunch. If I spend any more on her then I''m going to end up in trouble.''


    After taking a deep breath he exited his bedroom to an empty apartment. ''Edwin must still be in his room. Maybe he felt the antagonistic aura I was emitting. I sometimes say the most terrible things. But it''s going to be over when I find a place of my own. It''s been fun, Edwin, or Wendy, or whatever you''re going to transform into next. Maybe a canine? Things have changed since high school and we''re all moving on with our lives. It''s time I do too.''


    He snatched his keys, stepped out of the apartment, and headed toward his car. ''I''m resetting everything about my life, and it all starts as soon as I get this over with.''


    The ever-busy train station was becoming a meetup at the all too familiar rendezvous point. Waiting for him once again, Lucy got up from her seat and runs to him. "Hi," she said enthusiastically.


    "Hello," he responded as neutral as he could. "You look quite nice today."


    "Oh, it''s just something I grabbed from my closet. I don''t know a thing about clothes. You on the other hand, you look nice. Nothing flashy today?"


    "No. Not today."


    "How about you teach me about clothes sometime?"


    "Well... about that. Lucy, before we go on our outing..." He would have continued had his attention not be diverted by the large basked that Lucy was carrying.


    "Oh, this is our lunch."


    "Our lunch?"


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    "You said to bring our own lunch, but I figured that I''d go the extra step and prepare something yummy for both of us."


    "Are you kidding me?"


    "Well, they''re just sandwiches, but I''ve been told my food tastes great."


    "I get that, but when I said to make your own lunch, I meant for yourself."


    "I was but then I thought about you and... well..."


    Lucy began to get flustered, something Johan wanted to put a stop to, "Listen, I really got to talk to you, and I got to do it now. Lucy, please listen to me.¡± He took a deep breath before continuing, ¡°I''m afraid that I can''t-"


    "THE NEXT TRAIN HEADING TOWARDS CRAINE MOUNTAIN NOW BOARDING!" The loudspeaker interrupted.


    "That''s our train," Lucy exclaimed with excitement.


    "Wait, I got to tell you something before we board. I really need to-¡± She grabbed his arm before he could finish and pulled him along to reach the platform.


    Her excitement was propelling her straight into the train''s open doors as she pulled him along without giving him a chance to explain himself. "We made it!" She says excitedly upon entering the train.


    "Yeah, good. Anyway, I got to tell you something before we arrive at the mountains. Lucy, please listen."


    "Yeah, sure. Go ahead."


    She was so excited, full of vigor and joy. No words could do a better job describing her anticipation of the trip than the smile she was exhibiting. It was such a sight that Johan''s heart started beating. ''No, I got to do this.'' Addressing Lucy "Listen, I have to tell you something. Today is going to be-" The sound of the heavy engine from an adjacent train speeding by forced Johan to pause. Only when the pumping of the machinery and the loud whistles eventually faded into the distance could he continue. "Okay, this time, I got to tell you before something else interrupts us. Lucy, I can''t hang out with you anymore. I''m sorry but this is the last time. I don''t feel this is right, an adult like me hanging out with a kid like you. It''s not that I don''t like you or anything, it''s just that the feelings that I have for you... well... they''re not right. I really shouldn''t even be on this outing, but I wanted to at least let you know that I don''t hate you or anything. It''s just that society does not support this kind of relationship, but it''s for a good cause... I guess. You should really be spending time with your family rather than some strange man. Lucy, I want you to know that-"


    "Johan, I can''t hear you!" Lucy says loudly.


    "Come again?"


    "Loud noises plug my ears for a few seconds! You''re going to have to wait till they unplug!"


    "After all that I said..."


    "Okay, my ears are fine now,¡± she said calmly. ¡°What was it that you wanted to say?"


    "Okay, okay. I guess I got to start over. I''ll just cut to the meat of it. Lucy, I-"


    "TO ALL OUR PASSENGERS, DUE TO TECHNICAL PROBLEMS, WE''LL BE ARRIVING AT OUR DESTINATION TEN MINUTES BEHIND SCHEDULE. WE APOLOGIZE FOR THIS INCONVINIENCE."


    "Alright already!" Johan shouted at the roof before turning his attention to Lucy. "I really have to tell you before I get interrupted again. I can''t-" A huge crowd of passengers suddenly bolt into the train. A dense stream of people flowing onto each side packing the car was a force that pushed them onto the opposite sides of the train.


    When all was settled, the doors close and the train departed. Johan tried to get through, but it was too packed for him to squeeze in-between each person. He raises his head, trying to see above the crowd and spotted a raised arm waving back to him.


    Standing on his toes, he barely noticed Lucy''s as she waved her phone. He immediately reaches to take out his own only to facepalm. Raising his phone above the crowd, he mouths his words in an exaggerated manner as well as gestures his other hand in a manner that Lucy could guess his pantomime message, ''I don''t have your number''.


    Lucy looked at her phone, laughed, and shrugged her shoulders.

 Chapter 45

    ''She was on that side of the train, so she must have exited a bit beyond.'' He headed south and after a few minutes of walking, he finds her arguing with a staff member.


    "I''m telling you someone stole it!" he heard her saying loudly as he got closer. "You got to find it right now!"


    "We''re looking around, miss, but I''m sorry to say that it may not be recovered in time or intact."


    "This is not fair. This is your train, isn''t it? You should be responsible for your passengers."


    When Johan finally arrived, "What''s going on?"


    Lucy turned to Johan, "It''s terrible. Someone stole our picnic basket."


    "That big thing?" Johan responded with surprise.


    Then the staff member, "She was just telling me that a rather large basket was stolen as she was exiting."


    "Those passengers were pushing me," she continued. "I was finding it hard to get through and someone just swipes it from me."


    "Do you still have your things?" Johan asked, "Like your keys and your wallet?"


    "Yeah, those were in my pocket, but the basket..." Johan could clearly see she was on the verge of tears when she suddenly hugged him. He was taken aback by this sudden embrace but wrapped one arm around her while gesturing with the other that he would take it from there, allowing the staff member to dismiss himself.


    A little while when they sat down, wiping away her tears, "I''m sorry, I didn''t mean to start crying."


    "Nobody likes to have their things stolen."


    "No, it wasn''t just that. I worked hard on that food. Sure, it was just sandwiches, but I spent so much time getting them ready."


    "But why? You should''ve just made something for yourself. That''s what I meant when I said to pack a lunch."


    "Because today was a special day."


    "Special day?"


    "I''ve never been to the mountains before, and I''ve never been on a picnic. I was so happy when you accepted my suggestion to go on a picnic in the mountains."


    "Really? This trip means that much to you?" A sinking feeling emitted within Johan that a great remorse was upon him. "I''m sorry about the theft. I think he''s right; you may not see that basket again. At least they didn''t steal your important things. It was good you didn''t put them in the basket."


    "But what about the picnic?"


    "I''m afraid it''s been canceled, but since this means so much to you, how about we get something to eat later at a restaurant or something?"


    "But you said you couldn''t afford it."


    "Well, that was before I knew how much this meant to you. Besides, I was just going to spend it on myself anyway. I might as well spread the joy, you know?"


    "Are you sure? I don''t want to be a burden."


    "Burden?" He felt compelled to grab her hand, something that she wasn''t expecting, "Lucy, you will never be a burden to me. I''ll work twice as hard as long as I can make you happy. Never say you''re a burden, because I''ll always be here to bare the pain along with you."


    Taken from Royal Road, this narrative should be reported if found on Amazon.


    The words had apparently pierced her as Johan could feel her hand trembling as she slipped them away from his. She wiped her tears before placing her hands on top of his with a smile on her face. "Thank you, Johan. You''re a wonderful person."


    With a gentle smile of his own, "How about we head over to the hiking trail."


    "Okay."


    With a sense of rejuvenation, Lucy''s excited demeanor returned. Her anxiety now replaced with joy, she goes on ahead towards the exit to spectate the mountains ahead of them.


    ''I can''t tell her right now,'' Johan thinks to himself, ''not after this had happened, but now I''m buying her dinner as a result. This is going too far. I have to tell her eventually. But when?''


    The cool breeze swayed the orange and yellow leaves as both walked the trail, enjoying the natural beauty of the various trees lining the path, the vibrant colors of the flowers, and the various animals scurrying along.


    "Oh look, a squirrel." she asked as she pointed at a small critter.


    Johan chuckled. "I think that''s a chipmunk."


    "Oh, is it?"


    "You''ve never seen one? Not even online?"


    "I have but I could never tell the difference. Can you have one as a pet? I would love to have one. It looks so cute!" Lucy''s excitement got the better of her as she started running around, frolicking in the path.


    Johan''s amusement at the excited Lucy gave him a bit of a laugh. "Lucy, do you want to go off the trail."


    "We can?"


    "Sure. Come on." Johan stepped into the growth of tall grass with Lucy following along ardently. She couldn''t help but run circles around trees, peeking into every crevice she could find, then being disgusted when she peered into one full of bugs. She was taken aback but not offended enough to not have a laugh afterward.


    They eventually find a large tree with broad roots that held the tree aloft allowing her to go underneath. She beckoned Johan to enter with her.


    "It''s too low," he tells her.


    "Then crawl down here."


    He snickered. ¡°I guess there''s no harm, right?¡± Going down on all fours, he joins Lucy under the natural canopy.


    "This is nothing like pictures online," commented Lucy. "It''s so weird to see something like this up close."


    "Haven''t you ever been on trips like this?"


    "No. My dad was always working, and my mom doesn''t care. This is my first-time hiking in the mountains."


    "Well, I''m glad you''re enjoying yourself."


    "I am. I just wish I had our lunch. I mean, this would''ve been a perfect place to do so."


    "No, it wouldn''t. My back is already killing me. I''m getting out."


    "Oh, come on," Lucy playfully grabbed Johan''s arm.


    "I''m going to end up with a hunchback, you know."


    "No, you won''t,¡± and both give a hearty laugh.


    Johan removed himself from the cramped space and seeing that he wasn''t planning on returning, Lucy exits from the tree to resume their walk on the trail.


    "I''m having a lot of fun, Johan."


    "I''m glad you are."


    "But are you?"


    "Sure, I am."


    "Are you sure?


    "What are you thinking?"


    "Because I sometimes feel you are uncomfortable. Am I making you uncomfortable?"


    "Of course not. In fact, you''re the only person I like hanging out with." An uncomfortable feeling poked him after realizing what he had just said that, causing him to straighten himself. "As in, like a friend, you know? That''s what friends do."


    "You think of me as your friend?"


    ¡°Yeah, I do. Its fun being around you."


    She smiled, "I think the same way about you."


    "Oh, thanks..." Johan replied as he rubbed the back of his head.


    "Mind if I go ahead a bit? I promise I won''t go too far."


    "Sure, go ahead."


    With a gleeful expression, Lucy ran off once more to enjoy her merry day, leaving Johan to his thoughts. ''What am I telling her? It''s as if my mouth just says whatever it wants without me thinking beforehand. I can''t say those things to her, she''ll get the wrong idea. This can''t go on, I got to tell her that this is the last time we''re hanging out, that it''s not right for me to be with her. The more this goes on, the more she''s going to get attached to me.'' His attention returned to Lucy, who stopped to pick some flowers from the side of the trail. ''I don''t think she''s allowed to do that.''


    A crocus flower had gotten her attention as she plucked it and raced back. "What do you think?"


    "It looks lovely, but I don''t think you were allowed to pick those flowers."


    "I wasn''t? I didn''t see a sign or anything."


    "It''s just something most people assume they can''t do when they hike on the mountains. You didn''t pick any more, did you?"


    "No, just this. Isn''t it pretty?"


    "Of course, but I don''t know if that bug coming out of the flower appreciates what you did."


    "AH!" She let go of the flower while backing away but upon seeing Johan laugh, she realized that the flower was vacant from any sort of insect. This little prank amused her enough to laugh as well. "That wasn''t funny," she said as she playfully shoved Johan.


    Johan bent over to pick up the crocus and placed it in her right ear. "You look beautiful."


    Lucy couldn''t help but cover her mouth and turn around giggling. "Knock it off," she commented trying to control her amusement.


    Johan gently took the flower from her hair. "May want to hide it. I don''t know if you''re allowed to pick it, but just to be safe, let''s not pick anymore."


    "Will you take me to a flower garden then?"


    "Do you really love flowers?"


    "Well, If I can pick some out for you."


    "Alright. Maybe someday I will."


    With a gleeful smile, she placed the flower in her bag as both returned to walk along the path. In only a few steps of walking, Lucy gets close to Johan and wraps her arm around him. Another unexpected move from Lucy but Johan accepted the invitation as he wrapped his arm around her.


    He sighed as he thought to himself, ''This is turning into a disaster.''

 Chapter 46

    "Maybe we should get a tour guide or something instead," Johan said.


    "I like hearing how you explain things."


    "But I don''t know everything. I''m just going by what I can recall from my own trips."


    "You like to go outdoors, don''t you?"


    "It''s not that I''m an outdoors person, it''s just that I remember my own personal excursions. I''m just repeating them from my own trips in the past."


    "But you still go outside, right?"


    "Not really. Ever since I started college, I''ve been busy getting my psychology degree."


    "Why did you choose psychology?"


    "I guess... because I have a lot of questions and there aren''t that many answers. I want to find those answers."


    "What kind of questions?"


    "That''s a bit of a personal thing. I''d rather not say."


    "I believe in you, Johan. You can do it."


    "Yeah, thanks."


    As they continued their walk down the path, a sign caught his attention while a particular spot on the map caught hers. "Look, there''s a zoo around here,¡± she exclaimed.


    "That''s Franklin Zoo. It''s rather small but a really nice place."


    "Can we go?"


    "I don''t think I can afford to go there."


    "It''s not free?"


    "No, you have to pay."


    "Oh. Well, I guess when I grow up, I''ll be able to go."


    "When you grow up?"


    "I''ve never been to the zoo before, so I guess I''ll have to go there when I grow up when I make my own money."


    "You''ve never been to the zoo? Haven''t your parents taken you to one?"


    "My dad says it''s a waste of time and money when I can just see the animals on TV while my mom doesn''t care about going out unless it''s for a date. My parents aren''t interested in anything."


    "But you had to go on at least a field trip, right? Schools always take students at least once."


    "They did, last year at my old school, before I had to move here with my mom. I wanted them to wait after I went but she said no, so I didn''t have a chance to go."


    "I''ve actually been there three times. Once with my mother, then on a school field trip, and finally with my friends during high school. Every time I went it was so much fun. Now, I''m just saving my money. I have to learn how to spend it properly. But sometimes you just have to have some fun every now and again." He put his hand on his pocket, "In the end, I have all this money saved up but nowhere to spend it on except for school. I miss the days where I didn''t have to worry about cash." A furlong look was on his face as he stared at the distance before he turned to Lucy, "Would you like to go to the zoo?"


    "Oh, I can''t impose that on you if you''re-"


    "It''s fine. I''ll make up the difference some other way. Besides, this is your first time, right? Everybody should go to the zoo when they''re young. You''ll make some wonderful memories. How about making some first-time memories with me?"


    The invitation was such a surprise to her that all she could do was nod.


    --


    "That''ll be $67.00,¡± said the ticket lady.


    Remorse suddenly hit him. Nonetheless, he took out his card and accepted the charges. ''What am I even doing?'' he thought to himself.


    The mystery of where all these tourists disappeared to after the train ride had been solved after entering the crowded zoo. Lucy didn''t mind as her excitement had peaked when she saw flamingos, the first animals that welcomed guests. Without a second thought, she ran towards the rail to get a better look.


    "Look, there''s a white flamingo," she pointed excitedly while turning around, only to see that she left Johan behind. He was walking briskly toward her, but she returned to drag him forward. "Look, there''s a white flamingo."


    "Interesting. Must be a new addition. I don''t remember him since last time."


    She eagerly took out her phone to take photos and Johan couldn''t help but be amused. Once she snapped the final photo, "Come on, let''s check out more animals."


    "Calm down. Let''s take our time. I said we were going to make memories together, didn''t I?"


    And throughout the day, both were enjoying themselves as they spectated all the assortment of animals. Elephants, tigers, tropical birds, and Lucy''s favorite, giraffes. They were so majestic in her eyes as she was in awe at their height.


    "They''re so beautiful. Photos online don''t even come close to seeing them in person."


    "You know, some zoos have elevated platforms where you can feed them."


    "Can we feed them here?"


    Stolen content warning: this tale belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences elsewhere.


    "I''m afraid not. Looks like we can only watch them from the ground."


    "Oh Johan, I want to feed giraffes."


    Johan chuckled, "Maybe someday we can go to a zoo that will allow us."


    The evening soon became evening as the entire park was successfully visited. As they approached the exit, a souvenir shop caught her eye.


    "Can we get something?"


    "I don''t know. I feel like I spent too much."


    "Oh. I hope I wasn''t forcing anything on you."


    "No, it''s fine. I had fun today."


    Both smiled contently when a drop of water hit Johan''s face. They both look up to see that the clouds have gotten dense and thick. "It was sunny a few moments ago." Johan pulled out his phone as they find shelter under the store''s canopy. After looking at the weather report, "It''s going to start pouring soon."


    "Are we going to race for the train like last time?"


    "No way, not this time. I don''t even have a jacket on."


    "But it was fun last time."


    "Not for me."


    They go inside the souvenir shop where he finds two umbrellas. "You don''t have to buy me one," says Lucy.


    "An umbrella won''t kill my budget. Don''t worry about it."


    At the register he took out his card and charged it only for it to be rejected.


    "It looks like you have a limit on it," says the store clerk.


    "Oh, that''s right. I can''t spend a certain amount a day. Do I have anything left over?"


    "You have enough for one umbrella. I suggest you buy a broad one you can share."


    "Share?" says Johan with a bit of hesitation. "There''s no other option, I guess." He trades the smaller umbrellas for a large one which successfully gets purchased.


    Exiting the store, they are welcomed by a small shower. "Might as well put it to use," said Johan which prompted Lucy stand next to him. ¡°You keep surprising me,¡± Johan said with bemusement. Taking a deep breath, with the umbrella on one hand, wrapping his arms around Lucy with the other, both exit the zoo under the chill of the evening.


    --


    "The train is going to be a sauna," commented Johan, watching the large crowd of tourist waiting by the train platform. "It was bad enough when it was dry."


    "How about we just wait for an empty train?"


    "Yeah, I would prefer that."


    A small grumble was heard as Lucy held her stomach, "I guess we were having so much fun that I forgot to eat something."


    "Oh yeah. We haven''t eaten anything for a while now, and my card is spent."


    "I have a few bucks. You want a burger or something."


    "No, I can''t ask you to buy me anything."


    "It''s the least I can do. You did so much for me today. I wouldn''t mind doing this much." Leaving him with a warm smile, she headed toward the small food court.


    ''No, this is bad,'' Johan thought. ''This has truly gone too far. Now she''s spending money on me. I have to end this. This is getting so bad that I may never be able to tell her. I''ve been putting this aside for too long. I have to tell her and I have to tell her now. When she returns, I have no choice but do it then and there. It''ll make the situation awkward, but I have to do it. I''ll have to apologize for promising to take her to other places because clearly, that''s not going to happen. I can''t believe it''s come this far; I was supposed to stand up for myself. This isn''t right. This isn''t right at all. I bet people have been staring at us with weird looks without us knowing it. It has to end now. Forget the food, don''t even bite it. Just tell her when she returns-''


    "Here," Lucy said offering him a burger.


    "Oh, thanks," he replied as he grabbed it and took a bite. Upon realizing that he once again failed once again, ''Well, I do have an empty stomach.''


    --


    Train after train stopped to pick up tourist, all squeezing themselves inside, with barely enough space to breathe as the fog on the windows attested to. It took nearly an hour before the density of the tourist was small enough that Johan and Lucy could comfortably enter the next one.


    Their conversation on the platform continued on the train, looking at all the photos she took, and simply enjoying each other''s company when the train arrived back at the city. The rain was now pouring.


    "Looks like this time we won''t be racing to my car, huh?" he commented.


    "But it was so much fun last time."


    "I don''t think wearing wet shoes with socks is very fun."


    "Well, when you put it that way."


    With umbrella on hand, they walk a few blocks down to the garage, submitted the ticket to the kiosk, and made it to his car.


    "This is the same spot as before," Lucy commented.


    "It was?"


    "Yeah. You parked in this spot."


    "Really? Maybe I park here all the time. I don''t really pay attention to that kind of detail."


    They enter his vehicle, turn up the heater, and drive out while continuing their chat, laughing and having a joyful moment together until they reach her block as he parked right in front of her building, surprising Lucy who said, ¡°I thought you didn''t want to be seen-¡±


    ¡°It''s fine. Don''t worry about it.¡±


    "Okay, if you insist. Thank you, Johan, for today. I''m never going to forget it."


    "I''m so happy that you had a fun time, Lucy."


    "How about you message me once you get home? I''ll have Google chat open. Oh, better yet, maybe you can give me your number now. It was kind of important earlier, right?"


    "Uhh... yeah, about that..." She was smiling and gleaming with joy, looking happier than he''s ever seen her. ''I got to tell her. This is my last chance. I have to tell her. If I don''t, I may be forced to just stop seeing her, and that will just make me miserable for the rest of my life. I have to make peace with her, and this is the only way. I have to do the right thing."


    "Johan, are you okay?"


    "Yeah. I really need to tell you something and I must tell you before you go." He took a deep breath and suddenly grabbed the umbrella behind his seat, "It''s still raining, so take this."


    "That''s okay. You can keep that. Besides, unlike you, I like running in the rain. I don''t mind wet shoes." She giggled.


    ''Why did I grab this?'' he thought to himself. ''I feel like facepalming. No, actually, maybe I can use this. Just tell her this is a souvenir and then let her know that this is it. I think that may work.''


    "Lucy, remember what I said about making memories? Well, I figured that this can be a souvenir to remember me by."


    "Don''t worry about that, I have my souvenir." She then pulled out the crocus from her pocket. "Even though you never gave it to me, I''ll cherish the moment you put it on my ear and called me pretty." She giggled again.


    "Oh, you kept it. I figured you''d thrown it away."


    "I would never do that. This was a part of our precious outing."


    "Precious outing?"


    "I guess it doesn''t matter to you since you''re always going out, but I don''t have many friends and I already made it clear about my parents. I was very happy when we went out. I''m glad I could at least do it for the last time."


    "Last time?"


    "Yeah. I mean, this is the last time we''ll hang out, right? You feel so uncomfortable around me, I can feel it. I mean, you didn''t contact me last time. I figured you decided that you didn''t want to hang out with me anymore."


    "Wait, Lucy, when did you..."


    "It''s okay. I understand. I appreciate what you did for me today. I''m so happy to have met you."


    "Lucy..."


    "I''m guessing we''ll never have a chance to exchange our new numbers. But it''s okay. This was fun while it lasted. But I''m going to miss you, Johan."


    "Wait, Lucy..."


    "But before I go, let me give you a souvenir of my own and I don''t mean the umbrella."


    "What souvenir?"


    Lucy took out her phone and started fiddling with it. Johan suddenly gets a notification from Gmail, a photo of Lucy with the crocus on her ear, posing like a model.


    "I took it sometime when you weren''t looking. It''s a little joke. I just figured that you know, this was the only thing I could give you because you''re special to me. Even though we won''t be seeing each other, I... really care about you, Johan."


    The drops outside from the pouring rain was creating a raucous tapping sound all around, but even with the distraction, her words sounded clearly enough that the world went silent afterward as he kept staring at the photo on his phone.


    "Johan? Are you okay?"


    "No, Lucy... don''t leave."


    "What?"


    "No, Lucy. Don''t go. Please, don''t leave. Stay. Stay with me. Please Lucy, just stay with me, forever and ever! I never want you to leave! Please, Lucy, I''ll do anything, just don''t leave me!"

 Chapter 47

    "Well, that was a pleasant trip, wasn''t it?" Johan said. "It''s been really fun but the rain kind of spoiled the evening. I think I''ll go home and take a nice hot shower. Thank you for a wonderful time, Lucy." A silence followed as Lucy simply sat in the passenger side seat. "Lucy, I have to go home now, so why not head on home yourself?"


    Sitting there with a bewildered look, "For one thing, you said you didn''t want me to leave, so I stayed."


    "Oh, I did? Ha ha. Well, I wouldn''t worry about that."


    "I don''t know, I''m plenty worried right now."


    "No, it''s fine. Adults do it all the time."


    "I don''t think adults do that regularly." Johan scratched the side of his face as the awkwardness of the situation prolonged. "I had a feeling you didn''t want to hang out with me anymore. When you didn''t contact me last time, I got worried and then realized that you probably didn''t want to chat either. That''s why I was so happy when you invited me out again, but even in the trip you seemed so uncomfortable." No response as he kept staring at the fogged-up windows. "Do you really want me to go away? Don''t you like me?"


    "What, no!" he said abruptly as he turned his head.


    "So you do like me?"


    "Well... ''like'' is a very vague term..."


    She put her hand on his knee causing him to jump a bit, "I really enjoy being with you, Johan. I''ve never had so much fun before. I don''t want it to end, not like this."


    "Lucy, I didn''t say..."


    "I don''t know why you don''t want to continue hanging out with me, but I would prefer if we remained friends. That''s why I keep asking you to contact me after you go home. Because I don''t want you to just disappear."


    A desperate look was on her face, sad and dispirited, that he could not help but feel despondent himself. "Lucy, I hope you don''t think I hate you or anything of the kind."


    "I don''t. I''m sure you like me too. After all, you wouldn''t have done all those nice things for me if you didn''t. I just don''t understand why we can''t be together. I don''t understand why you don''t want to see me anymore, but all I want is for you to be happy." The passenger side door opens, "Thank you, Johan. I will never forget you.¡±


    With those words fluttering in the cold rain, Lucy stepped out of the car.


    Stolen content warning: this tale belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences elsewhere.


    The End


    "The End?¡± Johan utters. "No, Lucy wait." Hastily unbuckling his seat belt, he reached out and rammed his hand on the passenger side door before Lucy could close it. "I didn''t mean to make it sound like that. Please, trust me, I''m not trying to get rid of you, because I do like you, Lucy. I really do. If there was a chance to go out on a date, I would jump at it without a second thought. It''s just that there''s so many things going on at once and I''m struggling to figure it all out. I know I sound ridiculous right now, and that''s because I''m just so confused. I really don''t even know what to think. I don''t want to lose contact with you Lucy, so please don''t think that this is over." A great look of desperation and remorse was on his face contrasting the one of shock and surprise on hers.


    After a few moments of standing in the rain with the door open, Lucy replied, "Did you just ask me out on a date?"


    "What?"


    "You just said it. ''If there was a chance to go out on a date, I would jump at it without a second thought''."


    His mind was trying to process what he was being told but he could not recall all the words that were uttered in that moment. "I think you misheard me."


    "I heard it clearly. You asked me out on a date, didn''t you?"


    He wanted to doubt that was the situation, yet he had no proof she was mistaken either. Deep down, he had a feeling that the words may have slipped during his pleading without him realizing. "Well, whether I said it or not doesn''t matter. It''s everything else, about how things are complicated and not even adults have all the answers. That''s what I''m trying to tell you.¡± Lucy couldn''t help but giggle as Johan was in panic mode, stretching out his arm and waving it in front of her. "No, no, wait. You don''t understand-"


    And she takes his hand and locked her fingers within his, "I would love to go out on a date with you, Johan." He was instantly inflicted with a minor case of catatonia as he could not believe what he was just told. When she let go of his hand, "I gotta go. The rain is getting worse. Call me when you get home please." She waved goodbye and headed off toward her building.


    She pranced all the way to her apartment and into the shower all while singing a lovely tune. Spinning and dancing back to her room she opened her closet and started going through all the clothes she owned. One by one she looked at every piece of clothing, trying to guess what Johan would think, and giggling throughout. It was so humorous that she laid on her bed, continuing to laugh and smile. With tears of joy in her eyes, cuddling herself, she quietly said, ''I love you, too.''


    ¨C


    "Huh?" Johan said as two taps on the driver-side window snapped him out of his spell. "Where am I? What''s going on?"


    A bright flash of light blinded him. "Sir, we got a report that you have been parked here for half an hour. Do you have any business being here?"


    When the bright light was removed from his sight, he saw a police officer standing next to him with a flashlight.


    "Oh, no, I''m done. I have to go home now."


    "Then move along, please.¡± Johan started his engine and drove off.


    Despite his recovery, denial was still in his head but even he could not refute what he had heard from Lucy. Taking his left hand from the steering wheel, he looked at his trembling sweating palm. "Maybe the story should have ended at that time."

 Dream 4

    Dream of the Victorian Lovers


    --


    In a town that separates its classes by left and right, with those on the left of the city, poor and wretched, never knowing the luxuries of life, and those on the right, the powerful, the privileged, those who cannot imagine a life without their decadence, sits those in the middle, not quite rich but certainly not poor.


    And from this middle section, a father, who desires her to move on to the right in pursuit of the riches he could never attain himself, has his only daughter marry a Bachelor from the Right. Should she marry the bachelor from the right, all will be secured for his family''s future and he can finally retired with riches beyond his wild imagination.


    But alas, love comes at us at the strangest of places for the Bachelor of the Right meant nothing to her. No, it was rather for the Young Dashing Man of the middle. His position in life was no different than hers as he had an ordinary job that every layman has, but it was love at first sight when both met eye to eye on that faithful day. The more time they spent together, the more in love they became. She would go so far as to tell her father that she has no intention on marrying anyone other than the Young Dashing Man.


    ¡°Father, hear me, I do not wish to wed just any man.¡±


    ¡°What do you mean just ''any man''? Do you not understand that your marriage will secure your future for generations?¡±


    ¡°Money is all you talk about but I do not care about such a thing.¡±


    ¡°Such a thing, she says now. Are you not aware of the left, all those in that wretched hive? We are not secure in the middle. Only on the farthest of the right can we possibly claim security for our lives.¡±


    ¡°I would dive into the deepest darkest corner of the left to be with him, for I am in love.¡±


    ¡°In love with that commoner? Stop with the nonsense. You have just recently come of age and are now a woman, but you still act like a child. Do not tell me you will be producing offspring that are no better than the fools that do nothing but dance all day to street performers and drink their worries away.¡±


    ¡°Is that what you think of all commoners? Especially when you are one? Father, you are disillusioned with the idea of riches that it has blinded you.¡±


    ¡°Not another word. I do not care for your protest. You will marry the Bachelor from the Right and provide me, your father, with a good future, or so help me you will get such a punishment that you will wish you were never born.¡±


    He had made it clear that nothing would convince him away from executing his plans. The Young Little Lady, in seeking comfort, tells her beloved about the situation.


    ¡°Is that so?¡± The Young Dashing Man says, ¡°Your father refuses to change his plans.¡±


    ¡°All my father cares about is the untold wealth he wishes to acquire due to our marriage. As his dutiful daughter, I feel that I must follow his orders, but my heart aches knowing that we can never be together.¡±


    ¡°And my heart burns passionately for you. I will do anything to have your hand in marriage, and so I too will speak to your father about the matter.¡±


    The Young Dashing Man arrives at the humble home of the hopeful-to-be-miser of an old fool.


    ¡°I made it clear,¡± the father spoke boldly, ¡°she is to marry the Bachelor of the Right so I can secure a dowry enough for me to retire and live my days in comfort, never looking forward to a day of painful labor come forward thereafter.¡±


    If you come across this story on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it.


    ¡°Be reasonable, sir. Your daughter has fallen in love with me, and I with her. Love has conquered our hearts.¡±


    ¡°Bedtime stories this early in the day? It is time to wake, young boy.¡±


    ¡°I am not a young boy. I am a young man. I know what I speak of.¡±


    ¡°You speak of inexperience. You know not how the world works as you are merely a young cobbler, working in a shoe repair business your late father passed on to you. You make nothing more than a few pennies a day. The left is coming to claim you, young man. Why approve of you when a suitable man for my daughter who has been blessed to a family with infinite fortune comes at my door and asks for her hand in marriage.¡±


    ¡°No, father,¡± the Young Little Lady finally spoke, ¡°he was most rude and demanding. He will not take care of me. He just sees me as his toy. It is what I keep saying and what you keep ignoring.¡±


    ¡°Did I not act the same way, when you were on all fours as a tiny thing? He will be no different than I, your father, for that is what a woman is, but a child, and he a replacement father.¡±


    ¡°Sir, do not speak to her in such a manner,¡± the Dashing Young Man said, ¡°for she is more than the sum of your own preconceived notions. She is a bright star in this dark world, full of wonder with a broad mind. If you only took the time to listen to her, you would hear her wisdom.¡±


    ¡°What wisdom comes from a woman? They know nothing of the real world, that is why men were created first before them as they take the brunt so that woman may take their leisure. All we ask is their devotion to their men, whether it be their father or husbands.¡°


    ¡°And what if I told you that I do not believe in such maxims? What if I told you that a woman can be as equal to men?¡±


    ¡°You have revealed yourself as a fool. You are one of those lunatics, are you not? Those mad men who speak about equality regardless of gender, class, or color. You must also believe that the filth on the left are as human as the one on the right.¡°


    ¡°But it is true. We are all made equally under Heaven.¡±


    ¡°I''ve heard enough. You are to stay away from my daughter, you loon. I will not have her mind poisoned by your crazy machinations.¡±


    ¡°Whose machinations are poisoning her? Your selfish delusions are forcing her into a marriage with a man she has no love for, while you brush away a good man who will love and take care of her needs.¡±


    ¡°Enough, or I will call the police.¡±


    At this threat, the Young Little Lady stepped in and pleaded to the Young Dashing Man, ¡°This has been all in vain. Father will not change his mind. There''s nothing we can do.¡°


    ¡°I refuse to bend to his will,¡± proclaimed the Young Dashing Man. ¡°I love you more than anything and to hear your father care more about a few coins so much so that he will sacrifice his daughter, it makes me most angry.¡±


    ¡°Leave now, you good for nothing cobbler,¡± the father said. ¡°Your future is on the streets begging for the crumbs that come from the cake I shall have my fill whenever I wish. Leave now lest I call the authorities.¡±


    ¡°I will not back down. I now tired of being looked down upon. I tire of being used as nothing more than a stepping stool while the world passes me by. I will become something greater than what I am. Even far surpassing such judgmental people such as yourself. Why, you hardly have a penny to your name and yet claim you are superior than me. We are both of the middle, why do you treat me like an insect when you too live inside a wall with the rest of the cockroaches?¡±


    ¡°That is it, I had enough.¡±


    With anger in their hearts and their blood boiling, the old man and the youthful young man clash in a great scuffle. The Young Little Lady tries to intervene but both men, so full of passion for their beliefs, wreck the shambled house further as windows break, tables crumble, walls succumbing to their thrashing, and the fight ultimately goes out into the street where a crowd circle around them by the easily entertained knaves who throw rocks and peanuts, egging on the two brute fighters. It was such a row that the constable had to call more men to pull them apart and take them away.


    In the end of it all, the judge favored the old man, claiming that the young man''s idea of a world where women and men were equal came from a mental illness and he was sent to a asylum to live the rest of his life in the shadows of society. The poor Young Little Lady was to be sent off to be wedded to the Bachelor of the Right, but no such thing would occur. Her love for the Young Dashing Man in the Middle was so great that his incarceration was unbearable and to live the life as another man''s possession who only saw her as yet another toy for him to play propelled her to jump off the tallest cliff she could find. Upon hearing words of her demise, the Dashing Young Man had withered and rotted away in his cell.

 Chapter 48

    The blaring from Carry''s alarm pound her head from the inside. Her fist put a stop to the racket. "It''s already eight?"


    Groaning as she got up from bed, pushing aside the various articles of clothing and cans of champagne with her feet, and nearly tripping on one of her shoes, she straddled out of her bedroom. A whiff of waffles gets her immediate attention as she turned towards the kitchen to see her daughter preparing a fresh batch.


    "Mother, good morning."


    "Huh?"


    Lucy took a plate stacked with waffles and places it on the dining table. "Just in time, they''re as fresh as they can be!"


    "What is this supposed to be?"


    Gently pushing her mother towards the table full of toppings, she offered her a seat, "Sit down and enjoy breakfast. I have both honey and maple syrup; I don''t know which one you like so I bought both. I also sliced some apples and even provided some cinnamon dust."


    "I don''t understand. What is happening?"


    "I got to get ready for school, so just enjoy yourself. Don''t worry about me, I already had some earlier." Lucy kissed her mom on the cheek, something Carry was not expecting as she was taken aback. "I''ll assume you''ll be out tonight too, so I won''t make dinner. Just go out and enjoy yourself. I want you to be happy, Mother." Lucy pranced her way toward the room but before entering, "Don''t worry, Mom. As long as you are happy, that is all that matters. Isn''t love wonderful?"


    The bedroom door closed leaving Carry to sit there bewildered with a plate of waffles in front of her, confused about what had taken place.


    Recess couldn''t come fast enough as Lucy searched a good spot to sit down and devote all her attention to her phone. Swiping through article after article with one hand, taking notes on her notepad with another.


    ¡°Fun ideas for a first-time date?¡± a familiar voice caused her to turn around with a shocked look.


    "Jenny!" she uttered as she stood up and held her phone and notepad close to her.


    "What are you studying?" Jenny asked in a condescending matter.


    "It''s just schoolwork.¡±


    "What teacher teaches you to date in this school?"


    "Jenny, you''re always being sneaky and nosy."


    "It''s part of my charm."


    "That''s not charming, it''s rude."


    "Whatever you say, Lucy."


    Aggravated as she was, an idea sprung up in Lucy''s head, "Say, Jenny, about you and your boyfriend. How is it going?"


    "We broke up."


    "You broke up?"


    "Yeah. We had our last fight. I just couldn''t believe that he refused to tell his friends about us, so I told him that he has to tell them right now."


    "Jenny, I told you not to do that."


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    "I couldn''t help it. I wanted us to be a real couple and you can''t be a real couple unless your friends know about it. That''s one of the rules of dating you know."


    "What rules of dating?"


    "I read it in some blog some time ago. Don''t remember how it went but it said something about being a ''domineering woman'' and that I must ''stand up as an independent woman''. Something like that."


    "Okay, but how are you right now?"


    "I''m fine."


    "You''re fine? You''re not sad or anything?"


    "No. I''m doing okay."


    "But I thought you loved him."


    "I guess we didn''t get to the part where we fell in love. We weren''t at that level yet."


    ¡°What do you by that?¡±


    She approached Lucy and patted her on the shoulder. "Oh Lucy, you''re still too young to understand how love works. Let me, Jenny Jenkins, tell you all about it. You see, when a boy likes a girl, or a girl likes a boy, either way, they ask each other out."


    "Yeah, I get that."


    "Just listen, okay? Anyway, they start doing romantic things and they get points whenever one does something nice for the other. The more one does nice things, the more points they get. Eventually, you get enough points to redeem it for a ticket. Once you get that ticket, you have to exchange it with the other. Once you do, you have officially leveled up to love status, and you are in love. That''s how it works."


    With a confused and befuddled look on her face, "Where does the ticket come from?"


    "You got to make it yourself, silly. You look at your love notepad and see how many points you have and if it reaches a high enough number, you make a ticket and you exchange it with your boyfriend. Once both accept each other''s tickets, you have fallen in love."


    "Jenny, where did you read that?"


    "Oh... I don''t remember. It was a long time ago."


    "How long? You must''ve read that when you were in elementary."


    "I guess I did, but don''t recall where I read it."


    "Sounds more like you played a dating game on your phone."


    "Oh, yeah, I used to play a lot of them before I started going for the real thing. Those games really helped me out."


    Lucy scoffed, "But still, you broke up with your boyfriend. Are you really okay?"


    "Of course, I''m okay."


    "Uhh... right... What about Jonah? How is he?"


    "I don''t know. I broke up with him and never saw him again. He made me so mad I never want to see him ever."


    "But you might have hurt his feelings."


    "He''s a boy. He doesn''t have feelings."


    "I think you''re wrong on that."


    "It doesn''t matter. It''s done. I''ll just have to start all over again with another boy."


    "Well, I guess if you''re okay with it. Anyway, I was hoping you can help me."


    "Sure thing. What do you need? I''m an expert in many things."


    "Well... I have this other friend who is dating someone."


    "It''s you, isn''t it?"


    "No, no, it''s another friend I have."


    "What''s his or her name?"


    "David."


    "You made that up."


    ¡°I''m not making it up. I answered quickly, didn''t I?"


    "Then what''s his last name?"


    "Uhh... bu... Butterface."


    "Butterface?" Lucy groaned at the stupid answer. "Lucy, there''s no point in lying."


    "Why do you assume I''m lying?"


    "Why else would you be asking these questions? You''re too shy to talk to boys and boys think you''re a dork."


    "But doesn''t that prove that I''m not dating anyone?"


    "I''m talking about immature childish boys, not handsome college men."


    Lucy gave another groan, "Don''t just assume things."


    "Then tell me, when was the last time you threw a tantrum and got so huffy? You''ve been acting weird for a while, you know? You get so mad and angry when I mess with you about love. You told me there was this college guy you liked called Johan and you got so defensive about him. You know how girls are when it comes to boys."


    ¡°No, I don''t.¡±


    ¡°It gets ugly. Girls fight for boys as if they''re the last piece of meat on a buffet.¡±


    ¡°That''s not me. That sounds terrible.¡±


    ¡°But think about it how you were acting. You get so mad at me whenever I ask you about Johan. That could only mean one thing.¡±


    "You''re wrong, Jenny. It''s nothing like that. But..."


    "But..."


    Lucy tisked, "Don''t think of anything crazy, okay, but what does one wear on a date?"


    Jenny laughed. "Is that it? You need to look sexy for your date?"


    "Se...sexy?"


    "You can''t go out on a date as if you''re friends. You got to look super sexy."


    "No, I don''t. I definitely don''t."


    Jenny grabbed Lucy by the shoulders, "Alright, I''ll help you out. Now listen carefully, okay? You''re going to need to do the following in order to have a successful date. First, download as many dating sims as you can."


    The school bell rang, "You''re going to have to tell me later," said Lucy.


    "Okay. Meet me during lunch and we can discuss what we''re going to do when we go to my house."


    "Oh... right... sure..." Lucy said with a bit of discontent before Jenny ran off.


    ''Sexy?'' Lucy thought to herself as she walked to her class, ''Maybe asking her was a big mistake. After all, she just broke up with her boyfriend and doesn''t feel any remorse. I hope the boy she was dating is doing well. After all, when I was in that car and felt like Johan was going to break up with me, my life was practically coming to an end.''

 Chapter 49

    Thoughts of Lucy swirl around Johan like a projection emitting from his mind. Her warm smile, the excitement she exhibited, her joyful mannerism, and most of all the kindness he showed her were on displayed in front of his eyes. ''Why? Why is this so bad? What exactly is wrong with this? I see nothing ill about it. Why am I seen as a bad person when I made her so happy? I don''t understand anything anymore. I don''t get it. What is it about this that is so wrong? I don''t get it.'' He sighed. ''Lying in bed and pondering about this will do nothing for me. I might as well get up now.''


    After getting dressed and exiting his bedroom, "Well, morning, stranger," Wendy greeted Johan.


    "Good morning," replied Johan.


    "Stoic today too, huh?" Johan ignored the comment as they headed toward the refrigerator only to notice the garbage bin with a box of orange juice. "I guess I''ll go to the store and get some more."


    When he grabbed his things and left the apartment, climbing the few steps down into the sidewalk, ¡°Johan,¡± the voice of Francesca makes him turn his head as she approached him.


    "Oh, morning," he replied in a rather bland voice.


    "No ''good'' morning, or am I reading too much into this?"


    "Everything is fine. Nothing out of the ordinary. Everything is normal."


    "I''m glad to hear that. Well, I am going to talk to Wendy right now. Join us if you want."


    "No, thank you. I have no interest. I have to go to store right now. Good day." He turned around and started walking the opposite direction.


    Upon arriving at the store, "Well, good morning, Johan,¡± Margaret said as she appeared before him.


    "Oh, yes, so I''ve been told," he responded.


    "That''s a strange way to make someone feel welcomed."


    "I am sorry if I offended you, I am simply just being respectful, that is all."


    "Johan, why do you sound like a robot? Come back to earth, will you?"


    "What do you mean?¡± He said in a rather cold tone. ¡°Everything is fine. All is fine in the world. Nothing is wrong. Everything is okay. There''s'' nothing to worry about, I''m doing the right thing."


    Margaret cocked her head to the side and gave him a confused look, "Okay..."


    "I have to go to the store now. Please excuse me," and he proceeded to enter.


    --


    "Is there something wrong with Johan?" Francesca asked.


    "When is there a time when he''s not?¡± Wendy responded. ¡°He''s getting worse and worse."


    "He sounded so... what''s the word?... disingenuous?"


    "Call it whatever you want, I have no idea what is going on in his head. He''s spiraling down further and further into some weird state of mind like a cantaloupe out in the sun, and I have no idea why. To think, he''s studying to be a psychologist of all things."


    "Could it be that he took that course because he felt this way?"


    Wendy''s eyes widened, "That could be a reason. I mean, the way he''s acting, he should be seeking a psychologist himself."


    The door opened with Johan entering with a box of orange juice on hand.


    "Johan, how are you today?" Francesca asked, "It''s a wonderful morning for a walk, isn''t it?"


    "I guess it is.¡±


    "Why not join us for a nice chat?"


    "I have no intention of being cajoled. I will be heading to my room now. If you will excuse me.¡±


    After placing the box of juice on the table, he departed from the two towards his bedroom. When the door closed, "Did you see his eyes?¡± Francesca said, ¡°They looked so lifeless."


    "Not just his eyes, his posture was so stiff. It''s like he''s barely alive. Something''s definitely wrong and I have no idea what to do." Wendy sighed as they opened the orange juice and took a swig. Francesca gave them a perturbed as Wendy put the box down. "Oh, I''m sorry. I forgot. I''ll pour you a glass."


    "No, it''s fine."


    --


    "No, no, no," Lucy said. "This was a big mistake. I''m leaving."


    "Come on," Jenny said, "The front opening of this blouse isn''t that wide."


    "No, I''m not interested in wearing something so open."


    Jenny pulled out another blouse. "Then how about this one."


    "That doesn''t close all the way up. And it''s missing the bottom half."


    ¡°It''s meant to be this short.¡±


    ¡°Oh no...¡±


    "Stop being so picky, okay? You''re acting like a kid."


    "Because I still am a kid."


    "And you really think a college boy is going to like you acting like a kid? He''s going to want a mature woman."


    "You don''t even know Johan."


    Jenny put her hands on her hips, "And I''m still waiting for my introduction."


    "Look, I''m not wearing that, okay? It shows too much... skin."


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    "Hmm... I guess you''re right. I mean, no point in showing off what you don''t have."


    "Excuse me?"


    "What''s your bra size?"


    "My what now?"


    "Can''t be much."


    "That''s it, I''m leaving."


    Lucy turned around and started walking toward the doorway, but Jenny raced to block her way. "Hey, come on. You want to impress Johan, right? I mean, you came to me for help because you don''t know what to wear."


    "I''ll just wear what I usually wear. He doesn''t mind at all."


    "You can''t do that at this point. That''s criminal. You have to wear something appropriate for a date, otherwise, you''re not going to score."


    A tinge of hesitation emerged within Lucy before saying, ¡°Score? What do you mean?¡±


    ¡°Don''t tell me you haven''t downloaded those dating sims I sent you.¡±


    ¡°Oh, that. Will you knock it off with those games? Those aren''t realistic."


    "In any case, hanging out as friends is one thing, but now that he''s your boyfriend, you got to act a certain way."


    "Boyfriend?" A strange sensation trickled throughout Lucy''s body upon hearing that word, one that made her feel nervous.


    Jenny pulled out another blouse. "Here, this blouse should suit you. Look, it covers the chest and its long sleeved."


    "But my stomach will still be exposed."


    Jenny lowered the blouse with a look of befuddlement, "What are you, five?"


    "Why are you insulting me? I don''t want to wear anything that exposes my body, that''s all."


    ¡°You''re impossible, Lucy. I''m trying to help you but you''re just acting like a little brat.¡±


    ¡°This is not necessary; all these clothes show off too much. In fact, why do you have these clothes?¡±


    ¡°Now you''re picking on me? Come on, Lucy. You want Johan to like you or not?¡±


    ¡°Johan is not who you think. He wouldn''t want to see me like this. I''m certain. He''s a gentleman.¡±


    ¡°Okay, so he''s a gentleman. What about you? You''re going out on a date looking like his little sister if you wear your normal clothes. You might as well go in your school uniform.¡±


    ¡°I just don''t see the point of wearing such revealing clothes.¡±


    The bedroom door suddenly opens, ¡°What''s going on here?¡±


    Standing at the doorway, a middle-aged woman wearing denim clothes and a wide assortment of accessories around her wrists and neck was standing by the doorway.


    "Mom, I told you to knock before entering," Jenny said.


    "Oh, I keep forgetting dear. But it is my home, so I guess I can get away with it. Ha ha ha!" Her eyes turn to Lucy. "Why, if it isn''t Lucy. About time you got to hang out with my Jenny at home."


    "Hello, ma''am."


    "Oh honey, call me Mitsy. Playing dress-up, are we?"


    "Mom," Jenny said annoyed, "We are not little kids."


    "Of course, my little pumpkin pie."


    Jenny rolled her eyes, "I''m looking for clothes to give her on her first date."


    "Jenny!" Lucy said with a strong tone.


    "A little date? Oh, you kids grow up so fast. When I was your age, boys were still icky, but I guess that makes me old fashion." Mitsy walked toward Jenny''s closet and after going through an assortment of choices, she picked out a pair of jeans. "What about this?"


    "What about it?" Jenny asked.


    "She can go casual on the date but..." she turned it around to reveal the word ''Hottie'' embroidered on the rear, "She can be a bit frisky too."


    "No way!" Lucy protested. "I''m not wearing that."


    "Yeah mom," Jenny said, "She doesn''t have the hips to justify wearing that."


    "Oh, but isn''t this what you hip-young teens are doing now?¡±, Mitsy said, ¡°I still think it''ll look cute on her. Well, actually." Taking the pair of pants, Mitsy approached Lucy. "Turn around, dear." Confused as she was, Lucy complied and turned to expose her back while keeping an eye on her. Mitsy''s eyes darted up and down as she inspected Lucy. Turning her attention to Jenny, she placed both her hands parallel to each other and pushed them close until they were an inch apart. Jenny nodded. Lucy was furthered confused.


    "Is this a circus?" Lucy muttered before speaking out loud, "Listen, I don''t think I need anything special. I''ll just wear my casual clothes instead like we did before."


    "I told you, Lucy,¡± Jenny said, ¡°you can''t wear that on a date."


    "She''s right," Mitsy interjected. "A date is super special. You can''t just wear any old ragged thing. You got to wear something to create those wonderful memories."


    "Wonderful memories?" Lucy said as the words sent a serene feeling through her. "That''s right. I made some great memories last Saturday. That was pretty special."


    The thoughts of her outing with Johan, still fresh in her mind, had made her lost in that moment. The energy she had running around, the excitement she experienced while at the zoo, and the warm feeling being close to Johan as it rained, it all gave her a serene feeling that calmed her down. A warm smile was developing on her face only to be squandered when she noticed both of Mitsy''s hands, parallel in the same matter as before, going up and down her body. "Ladder,¡± Mitsy told Jenny who responded with a thumbs up, leaving Lucy perplexed once again.


    "Looks aren''t always everything,¡± Mitsy said to Jenny. ¡°Besides, we can ''make up'' what she lacks with makeup."


    "Makeup?" Lucy uttered, "No, I''m not the kind to wear makeup."


    "Oh dear," Mitsy said as she knelt down, "Are you okay honey? They''re not abusing you, are they?"


    "What makes you think from that?"


    "How can a mother not encourage her daughter to wear makeup? No, it''s your father, isn''t it? You and your mother are forced to do his evil whims." She put her hand on Lucy''s shoulder, "Lucy, you must call the police and turn your father in. It''s the right thing to do."


    ¡°Because I don''t want to wear makeup?¡±


    "Yeah, Mom, knock it off," Jenny said, "Not everyone wants to wear makeup."


    "Oh, that''s right, little miss universe," her mother replied turning around, "It''s about time I teach you how to apply makeup. Oh, I can''t wait to buy you your first kit."


    "Mom, I don''t want to wear makeup."


    "What? What are you saying? No daughter of mine would say such a thing. Are you really my daughter? Did the fairies took my daughter away and left me with a changeling."


    "Mom, I don''t want to wear makeup because I don''t need it. My skin is so clear and smooth that I don''t need any yet. Only when I get old will I need it for wrinkles."


    "Aw, you almost got me," Mitsy ran up to Jenny to give her a hug, "Don''t scare me like that, okay?"


    Lucy could only stand in place, watching this strange pair before her perform an act she had in interest in watching. "Well, I don''t want to wear any either," she said.


    "But Lucy," Mitsy said turning her attention back to her. "On your date, you want to impress this boy, don''t you?"


    "He''s plenty impressed when we hanged out."


    "But this isn''t just hanging out as friends, this is a date. Your first, I take it?"


    "Uhh... yeah."


    "All the more reason to be prepared. Honey, you can''t leave things to chance, or you will lose him to some slut."


    "No, he''s not like that. He''s a gentleman."


    "A gentleman, huh? To think there are boys your age that would be acting in such a way."


    "Mom," Jenny interrupts, "It''s not a boy from our school. She''s going to date an adult."


    ¡°An adult!?¡± Mitsy said concerned.


    "Jenny, why did you say that?" Lucy interjected.


    "No, no, no. Wait a minute now,¡± Mitsy said with a panic in her voice. ¡°There are limits to these things. Jenny, I told you, you''re too young to pursue older men right now. No sugar-daddy, remember?"


    "I didn''t do anything," Jenny said. "Lucy was already in love with him."


    Mitsy looks over at Lucy, "Is this true?"


    "Listen, Miss.... uhh... Mitsy, please."


    "Lucy, I''m going to tell you what I told my daughter about dating older rich CEO''s. You should not be a sugar-baby. You should have more respect, okay? Even strippers and whores have their limits."


    "I am not that kind of person at all."


    Jenny interjected. "Mom, Johan is not that old. He''s in college."


    "College? Wait, that sounds familiar."


    ¡°That''s because she told you about him over the phone, remember? Some time ago?¡±


    Mitsy''s face lit up as she clasped her hands loudly. ¡°Oh, that''s right. You''re seeing a college boy! I totally forgot about it. Oh, honey, college doesn''t make you an adult. Don''t confuse one term with another. Well, thank goodness. I thought you were dating some wrinkly millionaire who was old enough to be your grandfather. College student, yeah that sounds about right. Oh, they''re so cute too, I definitely know what you can do to impress him. Jenny, did you show her the blouse that makes you look sexy? Maybe she can wear that."


    Lucy was in awe at everything that had transpired ever since Jenny''s mother came in, a feeling she didn''t like. "Look, I thank you two for your help, but I don''t think this is me. I don''t want to wear something... sexy."


    "Oh honey, why didn''t you say so? In that case, let''s give her something that''s cute and stylish... and just a touch of sexiness."


    As Mitsy continued to dig through Jenny''s closet, Lucy responded, "No ma''am, I''m not interested in what you have to offer. I''m not like your daughter; I can''t wear such things."


    "How about this?" Mitsy said as she pulled out a particular blouse, one that got Lucy''s attention.


    It took a few moments of taking it in when Lucy eventually commented, "That may work..."

 Chapter 50

    ''Can time actually stop?'' Johan thought to himself as he combed his hair, ''Is there no way to halt everything? Must we be moving forward at a thousand miles a minute? Could perhaps time itself suddenly stop at this moment by mere coincidence? No, of course not. I guess I have no choice but to be at its mercy.''


    Upon putting the finishing touches, Johan leaves the bathroom to be greeted by Wendy. ¡°Hey, handsome.¡±


    "Yeah, hi," responded Johan.


    "Heading out?"


    "I just want some air, that''s all."


    "You sure nothing''s on your mind?"


    Johan glanced to the side, looking at the doorway leading out of the apartment. A grimace was on his face followed by a look of defeat and a sigh. He sat down at the table, rubbed his face, and began, "I''ve had another one of those dreams. I was a shoemaker of some kind and fell in love with this other girl. But her father refused us. I got into a fight with him and ended up getting incarcerated for life. I then learned that the girl killed herself and I starved to death."


    ¡°Where do you even get these dreams?¡±


    ¡°You''re asking the wrong guy. Even I don''t know what these dreams are. Are they a premonition of some kind? Am I destined for something? or am I looking too deep into this?¡±


    "Yeah, you told me about this."


    "If I really am the reincarnation of this guy, then that means he wants to be with his lover, and she wants to be with him. But obstacles are always present. He can''t be with his lover because there''s always something keeping him back. And even when they get together, an unfortunate event always ends their lives. How am I supposed to fulfill his wish if I can''t do anything about it?"


    "Is this really what''s been happening? This whole reincarnation thing? Tell me, Johan. Is there a girl you like?"


    Johan faced Wendy who returned a concerned look. Tapping his fingers, Johan asked, "Did you know that most marriages in the past were arranged? Apparently, in simpler times, the concept of love was not a factor. Marriage was more political than anything else."


    "No, I didn''t know that, but I bet you would. You like history, right?"


    "But did you also know that most men would marry young girls, like around their teenage years?"


    "Kind of, but I find that repulsive, even if it was in the past."


    "I know this is going to sound crazy, but why does it sound repulsive to you?"


    "Because it''s wrong. A girl that young can''t marry a man old enough to be her dad."


    "Most marriages were ten years apart."


    "Even still, that doesn''t make it any better. Why are you mentioning this?"


    "I want to know... what does it mean to fall in love?"


    "How do the two correlate?"


    "What if a man fell in love with such a young girl? Generally speaking."


    Wendy looked on intently with discomfort as they answered, "I don''t think that''s possible."


    "You don''t?¡±


    "No. It''s not possible. That''s not love, that''s lust. A man can''t fall in love with a girl that young, that''s not normal."


    "Then tell me, what is normal?"


    Confusion was now displayed on their face. "Well, that''s kind of hard to answer, but in the context of this situation, it would be social norms. I don''t care what they did in the past, it was wrong then and it is wrong now."


    "Falling in love?"


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    "No, I meant lusting over young girls."


    "But I said love, not lust."


    "There is no love between the two. Johan, why are you considering this thought process?"


    He sighed. "I just read it online and wanted to have a conversation, that''s all."


    "Well, I''m not interested in such a conversation. I''m sorry but you''re going to have to talk about this with someone else."


    ¡°Someone else?¡± Johan said to himself before he got up and walked toward the door, "I''m heading out."


    "Alright, take care."


    ¡°Yeah, as if you care,¡± he said to himself.


    --


    "Johan, what a coincidence to run into you like this," Margaret said excitedly.


    "Yes... coincidence..."


    "So, what''s new?"


    "Well, Margaret, maybe you want to hear this little story."


    "Oh, you bet. Tell me, what is it?"


    "There''s a girl who likes me."


    "I know that already."


    "Well, for the purpose of this experiment, how about we say this is a completely different girl."


    "Oh, catfight?"


    "Nothing like that."


    "But don''t you already have a girlfriend?"


    "I never said that."


    "So you broke up?"


    "Margaret, just listen to what I have to say. There''s this other girl who likes me. She confessed her feelings and wants me to be her boyfriend."


    "Is she cute?"


    "Yes, she is cute."


    "Is she kind and sweet?"


    "Of course, she''s kind and sweet."


    "Does she have money?"


    "Money? Uhh... yeah, okay, she does."


    "Does she have a car?"


    "Okay, listen, she has everything you would approve of. How about that?"


    "Oh, that''s nice. She''s just like my sister."


    "Sure. Anyway, what do you think about this situation?"


    "Go for it. I mean, your girlfriend just broke up with you. You need to move and get with a rather nice and youthful girl. If my sister is your fancy-"


    "She''s a minor."


    Her excitement suddenly dropped, "What?"


    "She''s hasn''t graduated high school."


    "Wh... wha... wait a minute, what is this?"


    "There''s a young girl who is interested in me. What do you think I should do?"


    "You''re asking me for something so obvious?"


    "I want your opinion."


    "Johan, you know the answer is no. You stay away from that gold digger, okay? She''s too young. She should be dating rich boys with sports cars, not handsome college boys who should be dating girls his age with lots of money and fancy cars and happens to be right next to you, and you have to do it immediately unless it''s my sister, in which case there''s something wrong you if you like a slut like her."


    "But she said she was in love with me."


    "At that age, they don''t know anything about love. They only know about money and power."


    "How do you know that''s what teenage girls are like?"


    "Hello? I was once sixteen, but that''s not the point. You''re not seriously considering dating a teenager, are you?"


    "I looked up the laws of this state about consent..."


    "Johan, what is the matter with you? She''s still a child!"


    "Well, I think they''re on their way to adulthood in my opinion."


    "I can''t believe you are even considering going out with a little baby. This is disgusting and morally wrong. You stay away from her, for your own good and hers."


    "Is that how you really feel?"


    "Yes, of course. Only a disgusting nasty person would even consider going out with such a little kid, okay?"


    "But what about her feelings?"


    "What about them?"


    "If I tell her no, she will be sad and cry."


    "Who cares? She''s a teenager. She''ll get over it with the next boy."


    "But what if it was meant to be? What if my soul mate was her?¡±


    "I can''t believe what I''m hearing! You really are thinking of going out with a baby."


    "I feel like you are objectifying her."


    "I''m not objectifying anyone; I''m just saying she''s a snot-nosed bratty little kid who doesn''t know any better. Johan, stop this insanity. You''re going to go to jail."


    "Jail?"


    "Yes. The police are going to lock you up."


    "I just said I looked up the consent laws."


    Margaret covered her ears, "Will you stop saying things like that? Johan, what happened to you? Who did this? Did someone touch you when you were a baby yourself?"


    "What is this now?"


    "Johan, you got to fight those urges! You can''t let your lust over toddlers win you over."


    "I''m not talking about toddlers!"


    "No, Johan. You need to seek help. You can''t be drooling and salivating whenever you pass a kindergarten." In the corner of her eye, Margaret noticed a woman pushing a stroller. A gasp escaped her as she covered Johan''s eyes.


    "What are you doing?" he asked.


    "Don''t look. You''re a danger to society."


    He grabbed her arms and pushed her away. "Knock it off! I''m not a danger to anyone. This was just a test."


    "What?"


    "I just wanted to see your reaction, okay?"


    "Nobody just talks about this. Come on Johan, tell me, what are you on? It''s that perverted friend of yours, right? He did something. Where did he touch you?"


    "I think I have enough data. I''m leaving. Goodbye."


    As Johan turned around and took his leave, Margaret said loudly, "Don''t listen to that pervert. He''s going to ruin your life. You should be dating nice, healthy, adult women who have money and fancy cars who''s been pining for you since college began, okay?"


    Eventually, Johan arrived back at his apartment, "Wendy, Margaret has gone insane. If she tells you that I''m becoming a pervert or anything like that, don''t listen to her.¡±


    Once he entered his bedroom, he sat on his bed. ''This really is as bad as it sounds. Maybe they''re right. This is a bad idea. I can''t go through with this. Besides, the idea of living alone is still floating in my head. I even have an idea for a novel I want to write during my isolation. I think it''s best if I just disappear from society and just live on my own. Lucy, I''m sorry but this time it''s for real. I''m not even going to consider telling you in person, otherwise, I may never let you go.''


    He took his phone and went straight into his text messages. The photo of Lucy with the crocus on her ear popped up and a great emotion within him arose, one of warmth and comfort. Of desire and need. Of wanting never wanting to let go.


    He dropped the phone into the carpet and placed his hand on his face. ''I don''t know what to do...''

 Chapter 51

    ''This time, it''s not going to happen. I have practically put myself in a dangerous situation. I''ve gotten too close to Lucy and now I feel that I am influencing her in a negative way. Imagine if this goes further. I''m going to get in trouble with the law. What will her parents think? I sure hope what Lucy said was an exaggeration. Every parent should love their child no matter what. Maybe that''s what she needs. She needs her parent''s attention, and maybe I''m the one getting in the way of it. That must be it. Lucy is having trouble at home and ignoring her parents. I''m a replacement of sorts, in some strange way. But... what about the dream? No, there has to be a logical explanation. I''m sure somewhere out there is a story we read but can''t recall. That has to be it. In any case, I have to be considerate of Lucy''s feelings and tell her the truth. Tell her to go home and talk to her parents about this. I''m just an emotional crutch, not the cure. That''s what I''ll tell her.¡±


    With his clothes on, his hair brushed, and his shoes tied, Johan stepped out of his room and headed for the front door.


    "Wait, Johan," he heard Wendy as they approached him. "Johan, I want to say something."


    "Wendy, I''m about to leave now. I don''t have time for anything you have to say."


    "It can''t wait. I just want to say something. Look, I know you are going through things right now. I don''t know what it is, and you clearly don''t want to talk about it, but I just want you to know that you can talk to me about anything you want."


    "Wendy, I have to go now."


    "Please, don''t get the wrong idea about my meddling. It''s not that I want to get into your affairs. It''s just that... well... we''re friends, right?"


    "Wendy, stop worrying about me. Besides, I''ve finally realized what I have to do, and I got to do it now before it''s too late."


    "Really? What is it?"


    "That''s a private matter."


    "Really? So this is it?"


    "Pretty much. Now I have to go."


    ¡°Really?¡±


    ¡°Yes, now please...¡±


    "Wait, Johan, before you go, I just want to say that whatever it is that you are going through, please, no matter what, just be happy."


    "What?"


    "I was thinking hard about what is going on, but I came to the conclusion that you should find your happiness. No matter where it is, go and search for it."


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    "What kind of advice is that?"


    "I really don''t know how to explain it, but it''s the only thing I could figure out. Johan, no matter what, be happy."


    With a blank stare on his face. he turned around, "Goodbye, Wendy," and closed the door.


    When he stepped down into the sidewalk, ''My happiness is gone, and everyone took it away. Your advice means nothing. Everything I ever loved and respected is in the past. Unless you can turn back time, nothing else will make me happy.''


    --


    It was practically a ritual at this point; going to the same spot every time he visited the train station to meet up with Lucy, and just as before, his anxiety tagged along. ''This time, it''s officially over. Just get it over with, okay? Just tell her outright what you thought of this morning. I''m sure she will finally understand if I explain about her parents. After all, she was prepared to accept my rejection the last time we were together. This time, I have to be strong. I have to be a man and let her know that this is the last time.''


    He arrived at the meetup with Lucy waited for him at the same spot as always.


    But unlike before, today Lucy wore a curious blouse that was fancier than her usual attire.


    "A friend let me borrow it,¡± she commented. ¡°I don''t have anything this nice. Do you like it? I wanted to wear something special for today."


    After a moment of silence, Johan responded, ¡°Oh, yes, I think it looks great, but don''t you think this is a bit excessive for today?¡±


    ¡°Well, I figured since it''s a special day, I should wear something more than just my usual clothes.¡±


    ¡°Special day?¡± Johan repeated to himself in a concerned manner. ¡°Yes, it looks pretty on you.¡±


    Lucy giggled as she covered her mouth, "Thank you. I''m kind of embarrassed to be honest. I never wore anything like this."


    Johan felt as if his body was tightening, contracting within himself. Taking a deep breath, "I have to tell you something, and it can''t wait anymore."


    "Before that, let me say something first."


    "No, it''s best that I start."


    Lucy grabbed his hand, "Johan, I want to thank you for everything."


    "No, Lucy, stop right there."


    "You have no idea how much this means to me. When I thought you never wanted to see me again, I felt like my life was going to be destroyed."


    "No, Lucy..."


    "But when you felt equally bad as I did, I realized that it was I who was going to destroy your life. I never thought I meant so much to you." Johan froze in place, not able to interrupt as Lucy''s smile had a hypnotic effect on him. "Johan, I know this is weird. I mean, it''s weird for me as this is my first time going out on a... you know. And with an adult of all people, but... I''ve never felt so happy in my life. I''m so happy right now that..." She took her hand off of his to turn around and wipe the tears coming from her eyes. "I swore I wouldn''t cry; I really did."


    As the tears streamed down on her face, Johan put his hand on her shoulder causing her to turn around. With a handkerchief on hand, he wiped her cheeks. "Lucy, I''m happy to have met you too. You have no idea how much you mean to me." These unexpected words surprised her so much that she started to turn her head away, but he put his hand on her chin. "Lucy, please don''t cry, because I''ll always be here for you."


    Though everyone around them went about their business, to Lucy the world stopped in that moment as she stood there watching Johan give her a warm and gentle smile. She eventually got the courage to speak, "If you promise me that you will always be with me, I promise I won''t cry."


    "I promise."


    With the last of her tears wiped away, Johan stood upright.


    Together they started walking out of the train station and all the while, Johan thought to himself, ''What just happened?''

 Chapter 52

    It was a sunny afternoon walking around the city. Lucy hung on to Johan''s arm, but a point came where he gently pulled it away from her, "Don''t take it the wrong way, Lucy, but please let''s not... um... make contact."


    "Oh, sorry," she replied as they continued their walk.


    ''What would people say if they saw that?'' he thought to himself. ''I can''t even imagine one of my colleagues catching that. In fact, who''s to say that someone didn''t take a picture already and is posting it online right now? Oh no, this is bad. I shouldn''t be on a date with a middle school kid. What have I done? Why didn''t I stop before it went this far? In fact, how far am I going to go with this? I have to stop this right now. This is bad, very bad. I''m already feeling the pressure of doing something I know is wrong. I got to tell her, and I got to do it now. I must put an end to this before I get in trouble.''


    "Johan!" Lucy''s near shout interrupts his thoughts. "Are you listening to me?"


    "Oh, sorry. What is it?"


    "Where are we going?"


    "Going?"


    "Yeah. Where are we going?"


    "Going..."


    "You did make plans, right?"


    "Plans?"


    "Are you just going to repeat everything I say?"


    "Repeat?"


    Lucy gave him an annoyed look before she gestured him to get closer to her. When he does so, she placed her hand on his ear. "Where are we going on our date?" She chuckled a bit and pulled herself away. "Sorry, I still can''t believe this is happening, and I know you are too embarrassed to let anyone know. In fact... I''m kind of embarrassed too."


    ''Embarrassed isn''t what I would say,'' Johan thought. ''More like scared. Wait, maybe this is my chance. Perhaps I can start by telling her that I forgot to make plans. Maybe that''ll make things easier.''


    "Lucy, I''m sorry but I forgot to make plans."


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    "You forgot?"


    "Yeah, and the reason why was because I had so much on my mind that I couldn''t concentrate. I''m sorry, Lucy."


    "Oh, I see."


    "Yeah, and... the reason why I had so much on mind is that... well..."


    "Don''t worry about it. It''s okay. Besides, we can always just do the usual."


    "The usual?"


    "You know, the usual."


    "What is the usual?"


    "Johan, even I know what the usual is."


    "What are you talking about?"


    "The usual things that people do when they''re on a... you know..."


    "The usual? What is the usual?"


    "Johan, you''re so silly."


    "Then tell me."


    "A movie and dinner. That''s the usual things people do on a date."


    "Oh, that. But that''s just something from TV. I''m sure people do a variety of things in real life."


    "Well, we''re not doing anything right now, so we might as well do that. Let''s go watch a movie."


    Giving it a moment to think about, Johan couldn''t help but chuckle. "Just like on TV, huh? Well, in that case, let''s head to my car. I think the closest theater is a few miles away."


    Upon hearing his confirmation of her plan, Lucy got excited enough to walk along him with a joyful stride. ''This isn''t so bad,'' he thought to himself. ''I can''t believe I forgot to set up some activities but looks like Lucy doesn''t care as long as she''s with me. And I don''t care about anything else as long as I''m with her. I''d say this date is so far going well. This date... date... date!? Wait, I''m supposed to be stopping this date! What am I doing? Come on, Johan, you have to do the right thing. No more stalling, no more being swayed by her charms. No more distractions. Do it right now.''


    "I''m having a good time," said Lucy.


    "Me too!" Johan said enthusiastically.


    ''I''m doomed.''


    --


    "What movie should we watch?" asked Lucy as they entered the movie theater.


    "What kind of movie does one see in a... uhh... you know."


    "I don''t know, that''s why I''m asking you."


    "I don''t know either. Let''s just watch whatever is on."


    "We can''t just do that. We can see whatever movie we want any other time, but today is special, isn''t it?"


    "I guess you are right. How do you know so much?"


    "My friend Jenny helped me out a bit."


    "A friend, huh? Well, in that case, what do we watch then?"


    "What about this one?" Lucy pointed to one of the posters.


    "Zero Kiss? Isn''t that a romantic..." Johan stuttered before he could finish the sentence.


    Lucy covered her mouth from amusement. "The other half is comedy if that makes you feel better?" she commented.


    "Come on, Lucy. Are you for real?"


    She grabbed his hand and while giggling pulled him to the ticket booth.


    In front of the ticket lady on the other side, Johan said, "Uhh... two tickets for, uh, ''Zero Kiss''."


    The ticket attendant looked at Johan who was avoiding eye contact. She then looked at Lucy who was smiling and a bit embarrassed. "Will that be one adult and one child?"


    Johan turned his attention toward Lucy who in turn looked at him. A bit serious and a bit playful, Lucy tapped her feet while placing her hands on her hips. She could see he was tense about the situation and eventually broke the tension by her soft laughter. "If you want to save money, or do you want me to pay you back?"


    Relief had come to save him as he laughed as well. He addressed the attendant. "Just give us two tickets already," and she obliged.


    "Enjoy the movie," the attendant said handing over the tickets.


    "Yeah, I hope so too," remarked Johan as he and Lucy enter the theater.

 Chapter 53

    "You''re clear to go," security said.


    "I guess they''re just being careful," Lucy told Johan as they headed toward the assigned auditorium.


    "Or they don''t want us sneaking in outside food," Johan remarked.


    "I never understood that."


    "That''s how they make their money. Movie tickets alone don''t cover the cost of the theater, so they charge you extra for the snacks and prohibit you from bringing your own."


    "Overcharge? But..." she looked down at her large popcorn bucket.


    "Don''t worry about it. I changed my account so the limit on my card would be higher."


    "Yeah but... I''m going to be honest, I feel kind of guilty having you spend so much on me."


    "It''s fine. I''ve been saving up but having nothing to spend the money on. I might as well have some fun."


    Lucy smiled as she thought, ''Johan is so nice. I feel really bad about him spending so much on me, especially since he''s so uncomfortable. I can still sense an awkward feeling coming from him. But I want him to be happy because he''s given me so much joy. Johan, please be happy.''


    After showing their tickets to the staff member at the entrance, they enter the dimly lit auditorium where they find their seats in the center. Lucy glanced around her, seeing a lot of couples sitting together, some with their arms across each other. ''I guess that''s out of the question for us.'' Another glance showed her a couple kissing, prompting her to turn away. ''That''s definitely out of the question for us.'' Looking around a bit more, she spotted a couple who noticed them and after a disproving look, turned their attention away. ''That''s rude. Why is there always that one or two people who always do that.'' Having had enough, she turned her attention toward Johan. Even though he was not showing any overt emotion, she could tell he was quite tense and uncomfortable. She noticed his hand had a slight tremble and placed hers on top of it. This prompted him to turn his head toward her direction.


    ¡°Just relax,¡± Lucy told Johan.


    He slipped his hand away. ¡°Maybe once the lights go off.¡± At that moment, the room darkened, and a relieving sigh emitted from Johan.


    Once the movie began, Lucy began eating from the large bucket she was holding. She nudged Johan as she offered. "I thought you bought it so we could share," she whispered. He reached in and took a few pieces of popcorn only for her to place the bucket in his lap. "I''ll leave you in charge of it." Johan gave a bit of an awkward smile and turned his attention back to the film. With a satisfied smile, she placed her attention back on the screen but from the corner of her eye saw the same woman as before now with a disgusted look before turning her back.


    The movie continued with many fun moments that had everyone laughing. Even Johan joined in, giving him some well needed humor and giving Lucy relief in seeing him enjoying himself.


    The tone of the movie shifted toward a dramatic scene where tension was rising as the female lead started an argument.


    ¡°Todd, how long are you going to keep up this charade?¡±


    ¡°What charade? What are you talking about?¡±


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    ¡°It''s as clear as day. You don''t love me, at all.¡±


    ¡°What makes you say that? Aren''t we on a date?¡±


    ¡°A date you''re being forced to go on.¡±


    ¡°But you''re the one who asked me out, Cheryl.¡±


    ¡°I know that, but now I realize why you paused before you answered. You didn''t want to go out with me, you wanted to decline, because you want to be Sarah.¡±


    ¡°Sarah? No, she''s just my friend.¡±


    ¡°It''s as clear as day. You want to be with her, so why not go for it. Besides, I think she likes you too.¡±


    ¡°No, it''s nothing like that. We''re just friends. That''s all she sees me as.¡±


    ¡°Have you ever tried just being honest with her? I mean, have you ever actually asked her out, rather than assume she''ll reject you?¡±


    ¡°Can we please stop talking about Sarah? Besides, we''re not on speaking terms right now, so there''s no point in bringing this up.¡±


    ¡°Alright, I get it. So, this is what you want, right? Then I guess we can kiss now.¡±


    ¡°What?¡±


    The female lead leaned in close and pressed her lips against his causing him to immediately back away.


    ¡°What are you doing!?¡±


    ¡°Oh, is this your first kiss?¡±


    He wipes his lips. ¡°It won''t come off. It won''t come off!¡±


    ¡°Hey, calm down now. Don''t act crazy.¡±


    ¡°WHAT HAVE YOU DONE! You stole my first kiss! That was for Sarah!¡±


    The scene ended with him running off into the distance.


    It was quite an emotional display that it impacted Lucy, being quite a powerful scene for her, but none more so than Johan who she noticed was more invested than any other moment that came before.


    The movie continued as it escalated to both the characters being regretful of their actions. This leads toward the climax during a rainy night at a train station when Todd realizes Sarah was moving away to another state. As he stood in the platform watching the last train disappear into the distance, he gets on his knees regretting never telling her how he felt about her and how he''ll never see her again. But to his surprise, she appeared behind him. They hug and kiss and declare their love to each other.


    The movie ends with their wedding as Sarah asked him about his first kiss with Cheryl, to which he replies, ¡°Oh that? That wasn''t my first kiss. That was a ''zero'' kiss,¡± followed by the words The End appearing on screen.


    As the credits roll, the lights turn on and all guests get off their seats, all except for Johan as it took him a moment before he looked toward his hand and saw that he was holding on to Lucy''s, prompting him to immediately pull it away. ¡°How long...¡±


    Lucy, while giggling, ¡°Since halfway through the movie.¡±


    His face would''ve turned red had he not had the foresight to regain his posture.


    Exiting the auditorium and heading toward the exit, "I almost felt like crying by the end," Lucy commented. "I love happy endings."


    "Yeah," Johan said, "It was a pretty good movie."


    "So you liked it?"


    "It was great. I had some good laughs."


    "But what about the ending?"


    "Well, it was a nice ending, but I kind of saw it coming to be honest. These movies always end with the couple being together. The typical fairy tale ending."


    "Well, sometimes, the best endings are the ones you are expecting, at least that''s what I think.¡±


    ¡°Well, as cliche as it was, I must admit, I''m happy for them.¡±


    ¡°So, do you want to get something to eat now?"


    "Yeah, sure."


    "Do you want me to pay this time?"


    "No. I''ll pay."


    "But I don''t want you wasting your money."


    "I told you. I''m not wasting money. Besides, I''m a man. I should be paying for the d-" He stutters his voice before he continued. "I''ll pay, okay? Don''t worry about me. Besides, I''m an adult. I should be the one to pay."


    "Well, okay..."


    They exited the building when Lucy took his hand, surprising Johan once again. His instincts to remove his hand from hers nearly kicked in, his mouth opening, about to remind her of his discomfort. But a great feeling of euphoria had emanated within him. A splendid feeling of joy and warmth that simply made him want to grip her hand. All he could do was smile as they continued toward his car, hand in hand.


    Lucy was content as she leaned close to him. She could feel his heart beating, causing hers to beat as well. But there was no anxiety from the rhythm. It was a soothing heartbeat carrying away their worries. At least until she looked ahead and saw the same couple from the theater, where the woman was pointing at them as they said something to each other. Lucy could not hear but could tell by their offended and dramatic gestures that they were not kind words. As Lucy and Johan reached his car, the woman turned her head and eyed Lucy straight on. With a scowl on her face, the woman got on inside the passenger side seat of the vehicle before Lucy entered the passenger side of Johan''s car.

 Chapter 54

    "I''d like the Caesar salad," said Johan.


    "And I''ll have the fried fish," said Lucy.


    Both handed their menus to the waitress, and she soon departed with their orders.


    "We should be lucky we got a table, huh?" Lucy said as she looked around the packed bistro.


    "Yeah," said Johan nervously. ¡°Though I''m surprised you ordered an actual meal after all that popcorn.¡±


    ¡°Popcorn isn''t filling.¡±


    ¡°It filled me up quite a bit. I guess it''s because you''re still young.¡±


    "Oh, yeah... so, did you enjoy the movie?"


    "Yeah, it was nice."


    "Really? I heard men don''t like romantic movies."


    "I heard kids don''t like them either, so I was kind of surprised you picked it."


    "Uh... so what was your favorite part?"


    "I liked the beginning. The guy was kind of clumsy and the girl wasn''t as smart as she thought she was. It was funny how both tried to impress each other but just failed to realize their shortcomings. That was quite funny."


    "So, you like the comedy more than the romance?"


    "Well, I am a man, I guess, ha ha."


    "I prefer the second half, the more romantic part. I''ll admit, I was looking forward to that part much more."


    "Yeah. I''m certain."


    "What did you think about it?"


    "Well, not to put down the whole movie, but I already saw the ending coming. It''s a trope for romantic films to end with the couple together."


    ¡°But did you enjoy it?¡±


    ¡°I guess I did. It''s not like I hated it, just the same thing as always.¡±


    "In that case, if you were to make your own romantic comedy, how would you write it?"


    "My own?"


    "You write novels, right?"


    "For my own amusement, nothing serious. I''m not planning on becoming a professional author."


    "I take it you don''t write romantic stuff?"


    "No. I mainly write adventure and psychological stories."


    "I figured you might add some romance."


    "I''m not much into romance."


    ''Yeah, tell me about it,'' she thought to herself before continuing, "But you love to write."


    "I do."


    "Then can you write me a story?"


    "Oh, sure, but I don''t recall you having an interest in reading. You said you liked watching movies and videos."


    "Well, maybe you can convince me to read more."


    "I guess I could give it a shot. What kind of stories do you like?"


    "Oh... well... something along the lines of... a boy and a girl... falling in love..."


    "So you''re trying to get me out of my comfort zone, huh? But the thing is I''m not certain I can actually write something romantic."


    "But you just said you predicted the movie."


    "Because it was cliche. Do you want me to write something cliche?"


    "Yeah. I don''t mind. After all, I loved the movie we watched."


    "Even if I did write a cliche romance, it would turn out pretty bad."


    "But you''re an author, right? Even as a hobby, you love to write."


    "Yeah, I do."


    "Then tell me what makes you want to write."


    Johan thought for a moment. "I guess it''s just the things I''m interested in that motivate me. I''m sorry to say but the romance genre doesn''t get me eager to write about it."


    "Your motivated by your own interests?"


    "Yeah."


    The author''s narrative has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.


    "Then it should be easy to write something romantic."


    "What do you mean?"


    "Think about it. What is something romantic that has happened to you recently?"


    Johan thought momentarily before his eyes widened causing him to turn his head around in a bit of a panic. Returning his attention, he found a very cheeky grin on Lucy''s face. "I don''t know how to answer this but..." The waitress finally returned and placed their food on the table. "Oh great, the meal is here. How about we now eat?"


    His attention away from her, all Lucy could do was roll her eyes and give her attention to her meal.


    --


    "That was really good," Lucy commented as they exited the restaurant.


    "Yeah, it was great."


    "So... what do you want to do now?"


    "What do you mean?"


    "Well, since I''ve chosen movie and dinner, or lunch in this case, I figured it''s your turn now."


    "I thought that was it. You said dinner and a movie, right?"


    "There''s still a whole day ahead of us."


    "But I don''t know what else to do. Besides, if we keep this up, it''s going to be night before you know it."


    ¡°It''s the middle of the afternoon.¡±


    ¡°But you know our excursions always end. Right up into the night.¡±


    ¡°Then we''ll stay out all night."


    "We can''t do that. I''m sure your parents aren''t going to approve."


    "My parents don''t care about me. So let''s just hang out all night long."


    "Your parents are going to get mad.¡±


    ¡°They''re always mad. I stopped caring what they think a long time ago.¡±


    Johan exhaled. ¡°Lucy, you can''t talk about your parents like that.¡±


    ¡°Why are you bringing up my parents? Let''s change the subject.¡±


    ¡°But a girl your age can''t be out at night, your parents will worry. I''m aware they don''t know about this. How could they?"


    "Yeah, they don''t know because they don''t care. I actually tried to tell them, but they don''t listen.¡±


    ¡°You tried to tell them!?¡± he said surprised.


    ¡± Relax. Even if they were listening to me they wouldn''t care. That''s what I''m trying to tell you. They just don''t care."


    "No, Lucy. I don''t believe this. I''m sure they care about you."


    "I''ve already explained myself. Dad only cares about making money and Mom only cares about dating other men. I barely see both of them."


    "You shouldn''t talk about your parents like that. Whatever grievances you have, I''m sure they still love you."


    "Johan, I don''t want to talk about my parents. Why are you bringing them up during our date." Johan gets hesitant while Lucy groaned. "Will you knock it off. I get it, you''re uncomfortable, but I''m getting kind of tired of this."


    "Look, you don''t understand-"


    "I do understand. This is weird, but only to everyone else. I''m fine with dating you. I don''t care about our age difference. I know people look at us weirdly but who cares what they think. All they care about is their own selfishness. I mean, what business is it to anyone that we''re out on a date. Why don''t they mind their own?"


    "Lucy, don''t say that out loud."


    "Can you please knock it off and start acting more serious?¡±


    ¡°I am being serious.¡±


    ¡°No, you''re being petty. How long are you going to be uncomfortable about this? I mean, I''m probably uncomfortable too but I''m starting to warm up to you. Yet you still refuse to acknowledge me.¡±


    ¡°Acknowledge? I don''t understand.¡±


    ¡°What do you see me as? Just a kid? Because I feel like I''m the more mature one here. Your always so uncomfortable that we can''t even hold hands. Only little kids get embarrassed when they have to hold hands. We''re on a date, okay? You can''t deny that no matter how much you want to. Why did you even ask me out if you didn''t want to? Oh wait, it just slipped. You didn''t even ask me out properly, this was probably more my idea.¡±


    She paused for a moment, inspecting Johan as she noticed a slight tremble upon him as he fiddled his fingers. Though she understood his position and wanted to pity him, she tugged on his sweater, ¡°You''re not even making eye contact when I''m talking to you. Why are you like this? We all have problems. I''ve been telling you about my problems for some time, but I don''t recall you ever telling me yours. You seem to keep to yourself so much. But I have a feeling you want to say something. What''s keeping you from speaking your mind?¡± Johan once again avoided eye contact as he scratched his face. ¡°You know you''re doing exactly what I ''m talking about.¡±


    ¡°Hey, Lucy,¡± he finally spoke, ¡°Maybe it''s time we call it a day.¡±


    ¡°Can you please stop ignoring me? It''s like you''re pushing me away but still trying to hold on to me. I mean, do you even like me in the first place?¡±


    "What? Yeah, of course. I mean, you become a good friend."


    A discontent look was upon her. "Just a friend?"


    "Lucy, what are you getting at?"


    "What do you think this is, Johan? We''re on a date, not another outing."


    "Lucy, please."


    "Johan!" she said this so loudly that the few people around turned their heads at their direction. She took his arm and pulled him around the corner away from the prying eyes of the public. "Alright, fine. If you''re going to act like this, go ahead, but at least listen to my situation, okay? The thing is, I can''t remember the last time I was this happy. I keep thinking about it but I can''t remember the last time I was really happy. I''m supposed to have memories of being with friends and family, but my family kept moving from place to place because Dad kept working and Mom wanted to do whatever she wanted. Whatever friends I kept making would eventually forget about me. And then my parents separated and are now in the middle of a divorce, but I don''t think my mom wants custody over me."


    "What about your dad?"


    "My dad just wants me to work for his company. Not because he wants me to be a part of the family business but because he wants someone he can trust when he''s busy with other work, or just drinking at the bar with his friends. I''m not his daughter, I''m just another employee to him."


    "That can''t be true. It can''t."


    "It is," Lucy said with a cracking voice as her eyes were now watering. "I only have one friend now and even hen; I''m just going to end up moving away. My parents don''t love me. I have nobody. I only have you, and I''ll do anything to be with you, Johan. I''ll give up everything for you, because you''re lonely too, aren''t you?"


    "What make you think that?"


    "You''re just like me, and not just because of the dreams. When we chatted, I noticed that some of the things you''ve said reflect what I have been going through. You seem so invested in studying and writing your novels, but you never talk about your friends, hanging out, or having fun. You always just keep to yourself. Maybe I''m wrong, but I have a feeling I''m right."


    Johan scratched his brow, "Well, you''re not too far off."


    "Johan, do you love me?


    Through the sadness in her eyes and the deep desperation emitting through her emotions, the question pierced him like a lightning bolt, fast and painful. He exhaled once again as he clutched his fist.


    "Is there a problem?" a police officer suddenly appeared. "I''m sorry but I couldn''t help see this situation. Is everything okay?"


    "Yeah," responded Johan. "Don''t worry. I''m taking care of it. She''s just a bit sad about her parents."


    Through the tears in her eyes, she gave Johan a disproving look.


    "Very well, sorry to bother you," the police officer said as he walked away.


    Johan turned his attention back to her only for Lucy to turn with a pout.


    Black dots suddenly appeared to decorate the sidewalk as both looked up at the sky where the clouds had now become dense.


    "Come on, we go to go." Johan took Lucy by the hand only to be rejected as she swiped her hand away.


    "I''m just taking the train home," she responded before walking away.


    "But it''s going to rain.¡±


    No response from Lucy other than turning the corner and being out of his sight.

 Chapter 55

    A false alarm as the rain never reached severity before the clouds make way for the blue skies. ''I guess she took the train home,'' said Johan as he sat inside his car on the train station''s parking lot. ''I shouldn''t have left her but it''s as if something else is keeping me back. I should have been honest with her from the very beginning. But what could I say? I didn''t know what to answer.'' He leaned back on his seat, ''But if there''s anything that I can confirm is that I was right. She''s having trouble at home and is using me as a way to cope with it. If that is the case, then the whole paradigm has changed. I''m just taking advantage of her at this point. As an adult, I have to be the one to tell her that. I can''t have her continue to use me as a crutch for her problems. In order for her to settle her problems, she has to talk to her parents. It''s a shame I can''t talk to them, but in any case, I got to convince her to do so. Rather than play along with whatever ideas she has, I... '' He paused for a moment. ''Playing around?''


    As the sun appeared from the clouds, Johan took his leave from the parking lot and began driving home. "Is this what all this has led to? She practically read me like a book. I am uncomfortable about this, I''m not even sure what I''m doing anymore. What was I thinking, leaving everything behind for isolation, I''ll go crazy. I wasn''t meant to be alone. I had friends, I had family, I had people in my life that I cared so much about, only to lose them all. Few acquaintances are all that I have left and even they are disappearing before my eyes. But even Wendy... Edwin... Am I really your friend? Are you still my best friend? Everything changed so fast, I don''t even know who you are, or who I am for that matter. Everything is changing. Is it because I''m becoming an adult? No, I already am an adult. I''ve been an adult for a few years now since I graduated high school. Is that it? Is it because I''m still being childish myself? That has to be it. I haven''t grown up at all. I''m still acting like that young teenager who knew nothing about the real world. Well, that has to change now. I''m no longer that immature teenager, I''m now an adult.


    "I think I finally understand what Margaret was telling me, to be a man. Maybe she too saw through me. I''m trying to hold on to the past, that''s my problem. That has to be. In that case, from here on, I will become the man I''m supposed to be. Whatever happened in the past is just that, the past. From here on out, I move forward to my future as an adult."


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    --


    Taking off the damp jacket and placing the umbrella on the rack to dry, "Johan, are you home?" Wendy said loudly but no reply. "I wonder where he is. I sure hope nothing is happening to him."


    At this time, the door opened behind them "Wendy, hi!" Johan said.


    "Oh, you went out?"


    "Wendy, how''s it going? I just came back from a walk."


    "A walk? In the rain?"


    "Say, Wendy, how about we do something later on. You know, just hang out like good friends. Good, mature, adult friends?"


    "Huh?"


    "That''s right. Just because we''re adults, doesn''t mean we can''t have a good clean fun time now, can''t we?"


    "Johan, your choice of words is weirding me out."


    "Oh, that''s right. I was quite rude with Francesca and Hera, wasn''t I, and that accident. Oh my gosh, I finally realize the error of my ways. I must apologize to them and have a night out, the four of us."


    "You actually want to hang out with my friends?"


    A bigger smile appears on his face, "Oh yes, let us ask them if they are available. Maybe they''re on a date. You know, a normal date that adults have that doesn''t involve anything weird."


    A look of apprehension was on Wendy as they look directly at the unnatural smile Johan is displaying. "Are you okay?"


    "Of course I''m okay! I''m better than okay! The world is my oyster and life is the pearl. It is too short to be thinking about every single possible angle and getting mad at it. It''s about having fun, but responsible normal adult fun. That''s what it''s about. Forget everything that happened in the past Wendy." He then grabbed Wendy''s shoulders, intimidating them further. "Wendy, I''m sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable or angry. I wasn''t myself. In fact, I haven''t been myself in years. That''s because I''m not myself, I''m a new person, and only when I realized this could I move on to be the man you see before you. I don''t care who you are, even if you do care about who I am, but that''s okay. As long as we can get past these notions, we can have a good normal friendly platonic adult relationship without any kind of strange taboo attraction whatsoever. Oh, that doesn''t necessarily refer to you, no sir, or ma''am, or any adjacent adjective that best describes your person, which I am not familiar but perhaps you can educate me on that soon."


    After a few blinks, "Okay... thank you... can you please let go of me?"


    "Yes, I will, only because I respect you, Wendy." After letting go of the perturbed Wendy, he headed off to his room.


    Watching him enter with a great stride as Johan swung his arms, Wendy thought to themselves, "He''s not going to appear next to my bed with a knife tonight, is he?"

 Chapter 56

    "Why Johan, how about that? Bumping into you like this in front of the store?"


    "Sure, Margaret, of course.¡±


    "Wow, you''re in a good mood today, Johan."


    "Why not? After all, it''s a beautiful Sunday, isn''t it? The sun is out, it''s bright and beautiful, why should I be despondent over a text message?"


    "You''re doing so much better, aren''t you? Last time we met you were a wreck, but now you''re all good."


    "Forget about the past. It''s all about the future now."


    "You''re so full of life. But tell me why the positivity all of sudden?"


    "I just want to move on with my life, to look forward to new and exciting things."


    "Hold on there, I know what''s going on. Come on, we both know what makes a man smile like this?"


    "And what do you suppose that is?"


    "Johan, don''t try to pull anything on me. I know why you are so jolly." She leaned in close. "Did you and your girlfriend make up?"


    A shock to his system made him jolt in place but no sooner than it happened, he returned to smiling. "I suppose you''ll mention Lucy. Well, you don''t have to bother anymore. There is nothing between us anymore. I put away my childish whims. I am now an adult, I don''t need to play these kinds of games."


    "Mind elaborating on what that means? After all, you were pining for her for so long, weren''t you?"


    "Margaret, I am not interested in Lucy or anything of the kind anymore. I am a new man now, one who looks forward, not back."


    "No way. I refuse to believe that."


    "Why is that?"


    "A person in love does not just easily give up the things they desire."


    Johan cleared his throat, "Desire is such a strong word. I would call it a mere fancy."


    "Mere fancy? Is that how you put it?"


    "In any case, Lucy is no more to me. I won''t be seeing her anymore. It''s not right."


    "You must be serious, but I still won''t accept that you simply cut her off."


    "You don''t even know Lucy."


    "But she''s a woman right?"


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    ¡°Well, that depends on how you define a woman."


    "Okay, I''ll put it bluntly. If you are over her, then you are single now, right? Unless you found someone else."


    "I''m still single. But I do plan on... uhh... dating women... for sure. Just waiting for the right time."


    "And when will the ''right time'' be?"


    "I''ve been thinking about it since yesterday and realized that I''m not being social enough. I''ve pushed away people due to my inner isolation. I figured that was damaging me. I decided that this time I will be more outgoing, more friendly, more social, so I will be making new friends and... uhh... dating women."


    "Is that so?"


    "Yes."


    "Really?"


    "Yes."


    "Really!?"


    "Margaret, you''re sounding like Wendy right now."


    "Alright then. Let''s put your new outlook on life to the test. You have to go out with me."


    Johan laughed, "Again, huh? Well, Margaret, I tip my hat off to your persistence."


    "Still rejecting me?"


    "I just explained myself. I''m trying to become more social now. I need time to get used to this."


    "Johan, enough. If you are really trying to move on with your life, and you do want to start dating women, well here''s your chance."


    "Don''t confuse my decision with eagerness. I''m not desperate. I''m just trying to figure out who I am and find my way in this world. How do I fit into society, that''s the question I''m asking right now. I can''t just jump into it all devil-may-care."


    "Or you still love Lucy."


    A disgruntled grunt escapes him, "She is not in the picture anymore."


    ¡°So you really did break up?¡±


    ¡°Well... that matter has yet to be... uhh... attended to. But yes, I will be the one to be breaking up with her.¡°


    "Well then, in that case.¡± Margaret rummaged through her bag and pulled out a business card. ¡°When you break up with her, call me tonight and take me out to dinner."


    "Margaret, will you please-"


    "If you are serious about this plan of yours, you will agree. I know I''m being pushy, that''s just who I am. After all, I''ve been chasing you since I laid eyes on you. I really like you, Johan. Do you understand what it means for someone to like you only to be rejected time and time again and have their heart crack every time?"


    "No."


    Margaret scoffed, "Of course you don''t, you''ve been an introvert for too long. Then let me put it this way, think about how Lucy is going to feel once you break up with her."


    "Please stop mentioning her."


    "Whoever she is, and whatever reason you have to break up, I want you to pay attention to how she feels. I''m not going to assume that Lucy deserves to have her heart broken, nor do I believe that she doesn''t. For all I know, you are the one who is going to end up heartbroken and she''s probably going out with some other guy anyway. I just want you to pay attention when that happens, okay? And once you realize what I mean, then call me up and take me out to dinner. That will be the deciding factor."


    ¡°Deciding factor for what?¡±


    ¡°If you really are over Lucy, then I will hear confidence in your voice. If you end up being heartbroken, I will hear sadness in your voice. If you have regret over your decision, I will hear despondency in your voice. And if you never went along with it, and Lucy is your soul mate, then I won''t hear your voice at all. To the winner go the spoils, after all.¡°


    ¡°What is this? Are you playing a game with me as a pawn?¡±


    ¡°Exactly. This is all a game and we''re all playing it, regardless of whether we wanted to or not, and I intend to win.¡±


    ¡°Margaret, stop playing these childish games. Not even Lucy would do that.¡±


    ¡°Lucy knows the game.¡±


    ¡°You don''t know her.¡±


    ¡°But she''s still a woman, right? Women vary from person to person, but deep down, we all know who we are. Some will deny it, and others will be prideful, but in the end, women are women, no matter who they are. You, despite being a gentleman, are also a fool for believing otherwise. Trust me when I tell you that Lucy is no different than me or any other woman.¡±


    She placed her hand on his chest along with the business card. Smoothly caressing him before walking past him as he grabbed hold of the card. Once she is a distance away, Johan pulled out his phone to read the text message that was left for him:


    Johan, can we meet today at the train station? I need to talk to you.


    He clenches his phone and the card, took a deep breath, and entered the store.

 Chapter 57

    ''So much for this,'' Lucy thinks to herself as she tosses the blouse on her bed.. ''Looks like I''m going to return it to Jenny.''


    After putting on casual wear, she grabbed her bag and headed out the door. In the elevator she thought to herself, ''I guess I should be lucky. I feel so bad for yelling at him yesterday that I couldn''t sleep. Maybe I was being too pushy. I can''t believe I did that. I just want him to be happy, but I guess I ruined everything. I hope he''s not too offended, but if I explain everything, I''m sure we''ll just makeup and we''ll go back to normal. Maybe it''ll be a long while before we go out on another date, but I''m fine just being friends with him. I just want to get this over with and go back to how things were.''


    After a bus ride to the train station, she waits in the same place as before. As always, Johan arrived punctually a serious look to him.


    Lucy took a deep breath as she got up and approaches him. "Thank you for meeting me."


    "Hello, Lucy," he replied neutrally.


    The atmosphere became stagnant as the vibe she was receiving was tense. "I want to apologize for last time. I''m sorry I got mad. I didn''t mean it, I just really, really wanted you to enjoy yourself. I feel so dumb for forcing something you didn''t really want. But I promise I''ll give you space if you want. I feel I was so selfish now that I think about it. But you know, it''s okay, we don''t have to go out on dates anymore. We can just be friends, you know. I''m sorry, it was just that I thought we had something going on and that we related so much, that I-"


    "Lucy, it''s okay. I forgive you."


    "You do?"


    "Sure. What happened yesterday, it doesn''t matter. Nothing in the past matters anyways. Besides, you''re still a kid. You''re still learning."


    Lucy gave a discontent look briefly before replying, "Yeah, I get it. Well, I''m really sorry, and I''m happy you forgave me."


    "Sure. Well, I hope you learned your lesson," he turned around and started walking away, something that Lucy wasn''t anticipating.


    She ran in front of him. "Well, I figured that maybe we can hang out later today, or not, next weekend, in case you need more time?"


    "No, Lucy."


    "Alright, I get it. You still need more time. But, just do me a tiny favor and this time... can you send me a message later today?"


    "No."


    "Not even that?"


    "No, Lucy."


    "Johan, I understand that you''re mad but I apologized. I just want to make sure we''re still friends."


    "That''s not happening either."


    "What?"


    "Lucy, I don''t think we should see each other anymore."


    "What do you mean?"


    "When we went out on our, for a lack of a better term, date, it truly proved something."


    "I know. You were uncomfortable. I totally get it. This whole situation between us is weird. That''s why I''m saying we don''t have to go out on dates anymore. You don''t have to force yourself."


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    "Lucy, I''m referring to you. That date proved that you are having issues and you are using me as some sort of temporary aid."


    "What are you talking about?"


    "Don''t you understand? Didn''t your think about this since the outing?"


    "Of course, that''s why I''m here."


    "So did you talk to them?"


    "Talk to who? Johan, what are you talking about?"


    "Your parents. Did you talk to your parents?"


    "My parents? What do they have to do with us?"


    "Everything. This whole thing has always been about your parents."


    "You don''t even know my parents."


    "I may not but I know one thing, that a parent should love their children no matter what and never abandon them. Lucy, I don''t know what is going on with you and your parents but clearly, this is not healthy. You got to talk to them in a serious manner."


    "Why are you bringing them up? They have nothing to do about this."


    "Only because you''re trying to cope with this situation by using me as a way to deal with it. This is going to sound ridiculous but there were times I kept thinking what''s so bad about dating a young teenager, especially one as smart and joyous as yourself." He paused to take a deep breath. "I''ll admit that I lost myself within my fantasies at times, but the reality made itself clear on that day. You''re still too young to handle mature situations. I now realize that you are using me to cope with your problems, and I''m using you as a way to cope with mine. All we''re doing is putting aside our real problems instead of actually dealing with them. That is why we have to part. Lucy, listen to me. You need to seek a psychologist. You need to talk to your parents and get some professional help. I''m just a student so I can barely diagnose the problem, but trust me when I tell you that your problems have to be handled by a professional."


    Lucy looks on, spellbound, as she replies, "Johan, my parents... they don''t care about me."


    "No parent should abandon their child."


    "But they already did. My mom mostly and my dad doesn''t even see me as his daughter."


    "That''s why you have to be strong and let them know about this. You got to be brave and tell them how you feel and if they don''t cooperate, you have to call child services."


    "Child services? You mean those people who wanted to talk to my dad?"


    Johan gave a look of surprise. "If child services are involved, I have a feeling that you really should look into it."


    "I don''t want to be taken away. I don''t want to be separated from you."


    "Lucy, forget about me. I''m telling you, I''m making things worse for both of us. I''m not helping you, I''m making you dependent on me. You''re latching on to me and the longer this keeps up, the harder it will be to separate."


    "What''s wrong with that? My parents will never give me any attention! They haven''t all my life!"


    "Lucy, calm down and listen to me. You have to do what''s right, just as I do. I can''t be with you. Please understand that this is wrong. What we''re doing is destructive. It''s going to lead us into despair in the end."


    "And how is turning me away going to help me? I have to go where my mom goes so I can''t have any friends, and both my parents have never given me any kind of affection. You''re the only one, the only one who understood me! I was ready to fight for you, Johan. I was ready to forget my parents and be with you. Because... because I love you."


    As if the world itself had frozen, Johan too was struck with catatonia, but this tundra of emotions soon gave way to the heat of the moment as Johan briefly shook his head. "I know, Lucy, but you have to forget about me now. I know you feel that us being together is the answer to your problems, but only because you feel you have no choice. But you do have a choice, and you have to make the right one. You got to talk to your parents, have a serious talk, and if things get worse, you got to get out and find shelter somewhere else. If you don''t have any family to turn to, then you have to speak to the authorities about it. Trust me, I know this isn''t easy, but you have to do this. Otherwise... if you keep clinging to me, we''ll just end up in big trouble." With all that said, he turned around and began walking way.


    "The dream!" Lucy''s said loudly, causing him to stop. "What about our dream? The dream of couple? They''ve been wanting to be together for centuries, remember? We swore to be together at last in the afterlife! When we got reincarnated, we were supposed to finally be together and be happy!"


    He turned his head slightly, "That''s just a dream, Lucy. Dreams don''t mean anything," and continued walking forward. The sound of Lucy sobbing along with the sound of footsteps fading away into the distance was the last he heard of her.


    Walking down to the parking lot, Johan got inside his car, closed the door, and after a few seconds of just sitting there, tears begin rolling down his cheeks as he lowered his head onto the steering wheel.


    ¨C


    ¡°Hey, Johan,¡± Margaret said after answering the call.


    ¡°So tell me, Margaret.¡±


    ¡°Tell you what?¡±


    ¡°Where do I pick you up this Saturday?¡± He said with confidence.

 Chapter 58

    Storming into her bedroom, slamming the door, and failing to stop the tears, Lucy drops onto her bed. "Stupid Johan!" she said loudly. "It''s you who doesn''t understand! We''re supposed to be together! Why!? Why are you pushing me away!"


    The sound of the front door opening puts a stop to her tantrum. "Lucy, I''m only here to get a few things. I''m going out again so why don''t you make dinner tonight or order some pizza?"


    "SHUT UP, MOM! I DON''T WANT TO TALK TO YOU RIGHT NOW! JUST LEAVE ME ALONE! I DON''T CARE ABOUT YOU!"


    "Okay, I''m off, bye," and the only sound following was the door closing.


    Lucy grabbed her pillow and threw it across the room. This pitiful attempt at quelling the sadness and anger in her heart did nothing as her emotions continued to convulse inside of her like a tornado. "Stupid Johan. How can I talk to my parents when they don''t even acknowledge my existence? You''re an idiot. I don''t even have any friends because I''ll lose them all once we move again. I hate this. I hate being alone."


    After moments of sulking in her bed, she sat straight up. "I can''t keep going on like this. I wish I could talk to someone, but I don''t want to be taken away by child services. I can''t talk about this with anyone else except my parents." After a moment to calm herself down, "Jenny is so far the only person I can call my friend. She''s the only one I can talk to. Maybe I should tell her about this. Maybe she can make me feel better."


    Wasting no time, she grabbed her phone and dialed her number.


    "Hey, Lucy," Jenny said. "How are you doing? How did the date go? You were supposed to talk to me about it when you got back."


    "Jenny, I''m doing terrible right now. I just want someone to talk to."


    "Whoa, you sound serious. What''s happened? Did he dump you?"


    "Yeah. He said he didn''t want to hang out with a kid anymore. I thought he was better than that, but I guess he''s just a stupid adult."


    "That''s terrible."


    "Yeah, but... I''m just confused more than anything. Maybe I''m not mature enough to be going out on dates, but I told him that I could be his friend, but even then he said no."


    "That''s awful, how could he say that? What a jerk."


    "Right now, I''m feeling awful myself, so I just want to talk to someone."


    "Did you call the police?"


    "Police?"


    "Yeah. He can''t be going around doing things like this. You got to arrest him."


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    "Arrest? No. I don''t want to arrest him."


    "Why not? If he did this to you, he''s going to do it to another girl."


    "He''s not going after anyone else."


    "Are you kidding? He''s going to do it to some other girl. All he wants is to have his way with young girls and then ditch them. My mom knows the type. You got to call the police."


    "He''s not the type to do that, okay?"


    "But what about the times he hugged you and kissed you, probably copped a feel a few times. That''s messed up."


    "Johan never did that to me, he''s not a pervert. Besides, why are you saying to arrest him now when you and your mom weren''t against it earlier? If I call the cops, your mom is getting arrested once they find out."


    "Why does my mom have to go to jail because Johan is a pervert? She didn''t know."


    "In any case, I actually don''t want people to find out about this. It''ll just be a mess."


    "Oh, that''s right. You kept it secret, didn''t you?"


    "Not really. I told my mom but she was too drunk to listen to me. But I''m thinking of telling my dad. He''s probably going to get angry, so I won''t mention Johan, but I will tell him I was going out with an adult."


    "But why would your dad get mad?"


    "Because he''s a dad. Of course, he''s going to get angry."


    "Well, I don''t have a dad, so I wouldn''t know. All I know is that my mom would be okay with me dating an older guy, but she says that I can''t right now until I learn to put on makeup and learn how to pick up guys."


    "Your mom actually encourages that?"


    "Yeah."


    "Jenny, don''t you think that''s a bad idea? I mean, you can''t just date an older guy."


    "But you just did."


    "And it turned out to be a disaster. Jenny, I don''t think your mom should be encouraging you to be dating so young, especially with an older guy."


    "Hey, I''m sorry that it didn''t work out with Johan, but don''t take it out on me. Besides, who can you trust if you can''t trust your own mom?"


    A sour taste developed in Lucy''s after hearing what Jenny just said. "No, Jenny. Even parents can be wrong. You can''t trust your mom on this."


    "You said your mom was drunk."


    "Yeah..."


    "My mom doesn''t get drunk in front of me. In fact, I think she quit drinking."


    "What are you saying?"


    "I''m just saying my mom is the best."


    "Why do you think your mom is the best?"


    "I don''t see why not? We go shopping for clothes, try to match up for the best pair, have a chat with a few drinks, try to attract a few guys..."


    "Jenny, you''re no older than I am. I don''t think that''s normal behavior for someone our age."


    "Oh, here it comes."


    "Excuse me?¡±


    "Alright, go ahead."


    "Go ahead with what?"


    "Call me a slut."


    "A slut?"


    "Yeah, I know you want to call me that. Lots of girls already do, that''s why I don''t have many friends. To think, I''ve been so respectful around you. I didn''t wear any shorty shorts or tank tops, didn''t act provocatively, and didn''t even talk about sexy stuff because I knew it would offend you, only for this to have happened. Well, that''s who I am. I''m a bit of a slut, I get it, but mom doesn''t care. She just wants me to be happy, that''s all, and she''ll do anything to make me happy, and I''ll never have anyone insult her, okay? So I don''t want you to talk about my mom like that anymore, you got it?"


    "Jenny..." Lucy paused for a moment before continuing. "I''m sorry. I really am. I didn''t mean to, I''m just going through some problems with my own mom. She doesn''t care about me. I wish I had a mom like yours."


    "How about you become my sister then?"


    "What?"


    "Yeah. Mom will adopt you, no problem. We can be sisters!"


    One single thought of the type of clothes Mitsy would recommend, "No, thank you. But I''m glad your mom makes you happy. Well, right now I got my own problems to deal with. I have to tell my dad about this."


    "So you''re not seeing Johan anymore?"


    "I guess not..."


    "Then can I have his number?"


    Lucy''s response to that last question was to hang up.

 Chapter 59

    When the elevator door opened, she immediately stormed right up to her father''s apartment, knocking it with a strong sense of determination.


    As soon as the door opened, "Lucy?"


    "I need to talk to you."


    "Lucy, why didn''t you call before coming? I told you to make an appointment before visiting."


    "This is an emergency."


    "An emergency without a phone call?"


    "Dad, I''m serious."


    ¡°Lucy, you''re supposed to refer to me as Sir.¡±


    ¡°DAD!¡±


    The loud shout was so powerful that it shook him briefly. That was when he noticed the serious expression on her face. "Come inside." Entering his apartment, Lucy was welcomed to a disarray of clothes and paperwork strewn about the environment. "I haven''t had the chance to unpack yet as I have some paperwork to do, but I''ll give you a moment of my time." He took his seat on the couch and signaled for her to do the same, yet she remained standing firmly. "So, you have something to tell me."


    She stared at his eyes, so cold and distant, but with eagerness peering through. "Dad, I really want to talk to you."


    "Yes, do tell me. I''m all ears."


    "I want to move in with you."


    Her father sighed. "Finally. It''s about time you said that."


    "Do you mean it?¡± Lucy said with relief. ¡°Is that all I had to do was just ask?"


    "Of course."


    He got up to his feet and she could not help herself as she started walking towards him. She raised her arms to embrace her father only to be passed by as he went to a drawer and pulled out a few sheets of paper. "Sign this," he said as he handed them to her.


    Upon grabbing the sheets, the header caught her attention. "Partnership agreement?"


    "It''s all legal matters, things you don''t know yet but don''t worry, you eventually will."


    "Is this why you are excited? Business?"


    "Of course. Lucy, I have nothing against your mother, but I believe she''s a bad influence. I know it comes as a shock, but there''s a reason why we are in the middle of a divorce. Now that you have finally realized who she truly is, I''d like to formally welcome you to the company. Don''t worry about the custody situation. I''ll deal with that personally."


    "No."


    "No? But you just said you wanted to live here."


    "Not that. Dad, I didn''t come here to agree to be your employee."


    "What employee? You''re being a partner. You''re owning a portion of the company."


    "No, dad. I didn''t come here to be your business partner, I came here to be your daughter."


    "You already are my daughter."


    "Am I? Because I don''t feel like your daughter. I feel more like a stranger when I come here."


    "Don''t say such crazy things. Who has given you such an idea?"


    "This is your doing, Dad. When was the last time we did anything together?"


    "What are you on about?"


    Lucy shook her head, "And Johan wanted me to talk to you seriously? You''re impossible to talk to unless it''s about money."


    "I''m asking you again, what are you talking about?"


    "Dad, I want to have a real father-daughter relationship because all my life, I feel like I''m nothing to you or Mom or anyone else in our family."


    "A real... what... Lucy, you''re confusing me."


    "Confusing? I''m literally saying it as it is!"


    "Why are you angry? I thought you came here because you finally realized the advantageous situation you are in."


    "To be a soulless worker for my own dad!? All you see me as nothing but another grunt for your stupid company."


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    "Lucy, that''s enough. How dare you talk about the company like this. This company bought you your clothes and accessories. If it wasn''t for this company, you wouldn''t even be standing in this luxury apartment, let alone have a chance to live in it."


    "Forget the apartment! Forget the clothes! I don''t want them if this is the only reason why you bought them for me."


    "So you''re not going to sign the papers?"


    "No, and I never will!"


    "Then you are wasting my time and yours. Unless you''re going to finally come to your senses, I don''t think you should just barge in here."


    "Why should I care about how you feel? I know you don''t care about me. You don''t care about me at all!"


    "Don''t you dare yell at me. I''m your father."


    "Not anymore! As far as I''m concerned, you have no feelings for me either! All you care about is your stupid company and your stupid bank account."


    "Is that so? In that case, you can forget about any gifts or necessities from me! Until you agree to my terms, you''ll just have to have that woman you call your mother to provide for you, and I know for a fact she won''t do anything for anyone but herself. She''s so selfish. I can''t believe I had to marry that terrible woman. I wish I never went along with this stupid plan."


    "What are you talking about, Dad?"


    "I never wanted to marry her, but your grandfather was making a business deal with another large company. I had to marry that witch in order for this company to thrive, but she was the worse person I have ever met. Ever since we separated, my father has refused to talk to me, telling me that the merger dispersed, and he had lost millions, but I don''t care. That woman, I can''t stand her." He finally snapped out of the temporary fever dream to find Lucy shocked. "I''m sorry, I got lost in my own thoughts."


    "I see..." Lucy responded somberly.


    "In any case, I got to get back to my work."


    "Dad...¡±


    "Lucy, I thought I told you that I don''t have time for games."


    "Dad, I''m sorry."


    "Sorry for what?"


    "About what happened to you."


    "Don''t concern yourself about it."


    "Can you please tell me? Tell me all about it. Maybe it''ll make you feel better."


    "This is not something for kids to listen to."


    "Dad, you treat me like an adult all the time. Why am I now a kid?"


    Her father paused for a bit before, "Yes, you''re old enough now. I know people keep saying that you''re too young, but this can be the start of your journey into adulthood, but it has to start now."


    "Enough of the pitches, Dad. I''m not an employee, I''m your daughter. Just talk to me like a normal person."


    "Lucy, have you been listening to me at all? I thought I made myself clear for some time."


    "And have you been listening to me at all? Even when I tell you straight to your face, you don''t seem to understand what I''m trying to tell you. It''s like we''re talking to each other in two completely different languages. Why is it so cryptic to understand that I just want to be your daughter?"


    "I never said you weren''t."


    "Then can you tell me that you love me?"


    "What is this?"


    "Just say that you love me. That you love me very much."


    "Love? Lucy... what... what are you-"


    "Just tell me that you love me!" A perplexed look was on Norman''s face as he started looking around his surroundings, a luxury apartment in a disarray of clothes, open luggage, and paperwork.


    ¡°Lucy, I really must return to work.¡±


    "You can''t say it, can you? I can''t believe you! You''re supposed to be my dad!"


    "I... I''ve... Lucy..."


    "Everything is now starting to be clear. No wonder you have been so cold to me. You have no love to give. Neither you, mom, or Johan. Nobody cares about me!"


    "Johan? Whose Johan?"


    "The guy I was dating."


    "Dating? You''re dating?"


    "Only once. I went out with a college guy."


    "College guy!?"


    "But even he didn''t care about me. Even he pushed me away. Nobody loves me. NOBODY!" With that declaration, Lucy stormed out of her apartment.


    --


    "Oh, Lucy,¡± Carry said seeing Lucy sulking on the couch. ¡°I''m only here because I forgot my ID. Just order something or make something for yourself. Maybe I''ll bring something but don''t bet on it."


    Upon finding her ID card, she headed back towards the door only to find Lucy blocking the way. With tears in her eyes and a quiver in her voice, she demands, "Mom, stay."


    "What?"


    "Stay home tonight. Let''s watch a movie together. Let''s talk. Let''s do anything!"


    "Lucy, I have to go."


    "Don''t go!" Lucy said as she hugged her mother. "Stay with me. Or let''s go out and do something together. Anything, I don''t care."


    "Lucy, get off of me this instant."


    "No! I refuse!"


    "Lucy stop this! You''re acting like a little kid!"


    Those piercing words forced her to unlatch herself from her mother and step back. "Me? I''m acting like a little kid? What about you? You''re always going out, looking for some rich guy, drinking all night, and coming home drunk. You keep telling me to make myself something as if you ever come home to actually cook anything."


    "Lucy, what has gotten into you?"


    "And what is the matter with you!? Why are you like this? Why are you so irresponsible? You''re an adult! Why don''t you act like one!?"


    "Lucy, how dare you yell at me like this. I''m your mother."


    "As if you care. You don''t care about me. In fact, I don''t even know if you care about yourself! Always going out with some creepy guy every night, and bringing them home!"


    "Lucy, that''s enough."


    "That''s right, I''ve had enough. I''ve had enough of you ignoring me!"


    "We''ll talk about this later, okay?"


    "After or while you''re still drunk?"


    "Lucy, how dare you talk to me like this!"


    "Then let''s talk about it. Let''s sit down and have a conversation!"


    "Oh, we will! We''re going to have a serious talk about this... after I come back." Carry proceeded to bypass her daughter but Lucy would not give up as she grabbed her mother by the arm. Carry tugs but Lucy would not relent. "Lucy, let go of me right now!"


    "No! Don''t leave! Don''t leave me, please!"


    "Lucy, I''ve had enough!"


    "If you leave now, you may never see me again!"


    "I''ve had enough!" She takes her other hand and slapped Lucy on the face with a force strong enough that Lucy fell onto the floor. The sobbing from her daughter was now starting to intensify as the tears were becoming a stream, so much so that when Carry looked at her hand, she noticed a few drops of her daughter''s tears on them.


    After wiping her hand on her blouse, "Just leave me alone, okay? You don''t understand me. Nobody does,¡± and exited the apartment.


    Feeling completely destroyed, Lucy sat on the ground, wiping the stream of never-ending tears. "Nobody loves me. Nobody cares about me. I''m truly alone."


    In her sadness, the cold world she was thrust upon was now disillusioning to a hot and violent storm of anger and vengeful spite.


    She got up on her feet and headed to her room, grabbed a duffle bag, and started stuffing clothing, her phone, and laptop. "If nobody cares about me, then I don''t care about anyone either. I''m just going to live all by myself. I don''t care about this stupid family anymore. I''m leaving and never coming back."

 Chapter 60

    ''Two hours, huh?'' Lucy thought to herself as she stood in front of the kiosk, reading the ticket dispensed to her. ''I didn''t figure the train station would be so empty this early in the night. I don''t think I should be waiting here all alone for two hours. Maybe I can just walk around the city for the time being.'' Lugging her duffle bag, she exited the empty train station. ''My train will arrive at ten. Maybe I can time it so that I can arrive here in time to catch my train. Then it will be an eight-hour train trip to the farthest city away from here. It should be morning by the time I arrive there, so I should be okay. And then... I guess I''ll just figure it out when I''m on my own.''


    She was so preoccupied with her thoughts that she didn''t realize she walked to the usual spot she would meet Johan. Her mind was now filled with the good times they both had when they were still friends. Back when she still smiled, a feeling of happiness that she wanted to last forever that began from that spot.


    ''Johan, why? Why did you have to just end it like this? I''m sorry I yelled at you, isn''t that enough? I should''ve never have gotten angry at him.'' She briefly paused as she clenched her fist. ''No, it''s also his fault. He''s being selfish. How can you just hang out with me and make me feel special and then just ditch me? Maybe Jenny is right, I should forget about him.''


    Continuing on her path, leaving behind the spot as her feelings lingered on, she took out her phone and went into Google chat where the memories she had with Johan remained archived. It was such a powerful feeling that she just wanted to drop to her knees, but her conviction that Johan was equally at fault gave her the courage to continue onward. ''So what if I got angry? I was only thinking of your happiness.''


    She reached the intersection where a red light halted her progress temporarily. As she waited for the light to give her permission to proceed forward, she started typing on Google chat, ''Johan, if you have to leave me, I just want to find out one more thing. Just one more thing.''


    A few moments after he sent her the text message, Margaret finally stepped out of her condominium and entered Johan''s car.


    "I guess not all of us have two cars," she commented.


    "Or would you rather we drive in your BMW?"


    "No, good sir. Only I get to drive my baby."


    "Fair enough."


    "But if there''s anything that you beat me in is your fashion choices. Nice blazer you got on tonight."


    "I just like wearing suits, that''s all. Not like I''m an aficionado or anything like that, but I have learned a few things. Your blouse is also quite sharp.¡±


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    ¡°It better be for the price. Shall we go now?¡±


    "Certainly."


    The car pulled out of the driveway officially beginning their evening.


    "Mind if I charge my phone on your dock?" asked Margaret.


    "Go ahead."


    As she placed her phone on his dashboards phone charger, "So how are you doing this evening?"


    "Better than ever, I''d say. I put away all my worries and leave them where they belong, in the past."


    "You keep mentioning the past, you know."


    "Is that strange?"


    "Kind of. Are you really going to give up on everything you''ve done up to this point?"


    "What a way to put it, but I see no use to hang on to something that is keeping me back, especially since it''s only brought me anxiety."


    "Haven''t you heard of the old saying, those who forget the past are doomed to repeat it?"


    "What mistake is there to repeat? I''m still just a college student after all. If anything, I''m fixing the errors that my life has produced."


    "But why exactly do you want to forget your past? I don''t think you ever explained that."


    "Nor do I intend to. The past is over. I want nothing to do with it."


    Margaret leaned in close, "You''re really going to forget the past? Then let''s find out tonight. When the date ends, the real fun begins,¡± and returned to her seat.


    "Another one of your silly assertions?"


    "Well, we are on a date, aren''t we? I did tell you to call me, right? And you did."


    "Yes, but don''t think anything of it. I''m just saying that you are a beautiful woman, and you are interested in me. I''m a gentleman, after all."


    "But are you attracted to me?"


    "Come again?"


    "Well, there''s my answer."


    "I believe you are attractive."


    "I didn''t ask for an obvious answer, I asked if you found me attractive."


    "What makes you think I''m not attracted to you?"


    "I didn''t say you weren''t, but the truth is stranger than fiction."


    "Are you playing more games, Margaret?"


    "Yes. Do you not like games?"


    "When I''m not the pawn, I do."


    "Interesting analogy. What the...?" Margaret grabbed her phone from the dock station. "My phone isn''t charging,¡± and placed it back. "Nothing. Is your dock station working?"


    "It should. Let me try it with mine." Pulling out his phone from his breast pocket, Margaret took her phone off to allow his to be placed.


    "Yours isn''t charging either,¡± she commented.


    "Well, that dock station is old, and I bought it cheaply."


    "And that''s what you get for being so cheap."


    "Six years of service isn''t so bad. I''ll just buy a new one."


    "But it''s times like these that it''s very important to have a way to charge your phone. Look, you''re down to 5%."


    "Oh... I guess I forgot to charge my phone all day."


    "Do you have anything else? Is there a USB port somewhere?"


    "No, this car isn''t that modern."


    "What about a charger for the cigarette lighter?"


    "No."


    "Johan, are you serious?"


    "I guess I got too comfortable with the dock station."


    "Oh gosh. Well, I guess it''s not so bad. I have 52%. I guess you can use my phone if you need it."


    "Well, it''s not like we''re going to be talking on our phones now, are we? After all, we''re on a... a... a date."


    "Yeah, that''s true. Just hope you don''t get an emergency or anything."


    "Yeah, I get it. I''ll do something about it eventually." He pulled out his phone and swiped it to check the battery power, only to be shocked to find out there was a notification: one message from Lucy. He stared at his phone for a few moments, blinking a few times before remembering he was in the driver''s seat. His attention returned to the road as he exhaled, his phone still in his hand hovering right next to him as if it was staring back.


    "So where are we eating?" asked Margaret.


    "I know a place," he answered nonchalantly, putting his phone back into his breast pocket.

 Chapter 61

    As soon as the elevator door opened, Norman stomped his way towards Carry''s apartment and began to bang his fist on the door. "Carry, Lucy! It''s me! Open the door!"


    "Norman?" he heard his ex-wife across the hallway who was walking up to her apartment. "Norman, what are you doing here?"


    "Where''s Lucy? She''s not answering the door."


    "Never mind her. What are you doing here anyway?"


    "I want to know who she was dating."


    "Dating? Lucy isn''t dating anyone."


    "She just confessed that she was dating an older man the last time she visited me."


    "What are you talking about? She never mentioned dating any old man."


    "Where is Lucy?"


    "She''s inside, I''m telling you."


    "Let me see her right now!"


    "Are you crazy? I want you out of my sight."


    "If you don''t tell me where Lucy is right now, I''m going to get you arrested for child abandonment."


    "What are you threatening me for? It''s after 8 pm. Where else would she be?"


    "Then why isn''t she answering the door?"


    "She''s probably asleep or something."


    "Carry, where is my daughter?"


    "Oh, now you care. Now you care about her. I don''t recall you caring about her when you just dumped her on me!"


    "Tell me where she is or I''m calling the police!"


    "You must be kidding! I''m telling you she''s in there. Alright fine, come in." As as soon as she unlocked the door, he shoves her out of the way and barged in. "Hey, that''s trespassing," she said but he ignored her as he surveys the apartment.


    "Lucy! It''s your father!"


    "She''s probably asleep, you idiot!"


    After a few moments, he returned to the living room, "She''s not here."


    "What are you saying? She must be in her room."


    "She''s not in any of the two rooms."


    "It''s past eight, where else would she be?"


    "See for yourself."


    Carry proceeded into Lucy''s room but upon finding it vacant, she rushed into her own room, and then finally the kitchen. "Is she staying with you?" She asked him upon returning to the living room.


    "If she was, I wouldn''t be here in the first place!"


    "She''s supposed to be here! Where else would she be? Was she taken? Was she kidnapped?"


    "That may be the case. She told me she was dating a college boy. Who knows what he''s planning to do to her."


    The genuine version of this novel can be found on another site. Support the author by reading it there.


    "This can''t be happening!"


    "And what about you? You''re supposed to be taking care of her!"


    "What about me!? What about you? You only have to see her on the weekends. I have to be here all week to take care of her."


    "Have you been taking care of her?"


    "Of course, no help from you."


    "Then why did she say you are ignoring her? Why did she cry saying you don''t love her!"


    "What are you talking about?"


    "The last time she visited me, she kept saying about how she''s not loved and nobody cares about her, and then told me that she was dating a college student. Why didn''t you put a stop to this?"


    "She never told me anything like that!"


    "As if she would. But then again, considering you were probably whoring yourself out there, I bet you brought a man in and he groomed Lucy into running away with him!"


    "No, impossible. I never bring any man home with me!... sometimes."


    "You disgust me! I have no time for this!"


    As he was leaving her apartment, "Where are you going?" she asked.


    "I''m going to look for Lucy!"


    "You should call the police."


    "I already did, but I''m not just going to sit around and lament everything that has happened to me. I''m going to fix everything!"


    After taking his leave and slamming the door, Carry sat down on the couch in a panic. "It''s not my fault. She should have stayed home. What is she doing dating? She''s only... what... five, six years old. How old is she again?"


    ¨C


    "A restaurant on the top floor," Margaret commented as sat down next to a rather large window marveling at the exquisite restaurant.


    "It opened a few months ago. It''s amazing, isn''t it?"


    "I''ve never heard of it. The view of the city from here is so beautiful."


    "But the view isn''t the only thing. Try the food, you''re going to love it."


    "You come here often?"


    "My first time, actually, but I''ve had a sample of it some time ago when Wendy brought some over."


    "Wendy hid this secret from me, I can''t believe her. I outta scold that girl for not letting me in."


    "Oh, yeah, sure."


    "Actually, if you''ll excuse me, I have to freshen myself up."


    "Go ahead."


    As soon as Margaret was out of sight, he pulled out his phone. Opening up Google chat where the many messages left by Lucy were waiting for her.


    You probably already deleted the app so I guess you''ll never read this, but I figured that I might as well tell you my real feelings. I meant what I said earlier. I''m sure you know what I mean, and I just can''t leave it like this. Johan, I really do love you, and I know that you love me. We''re destined to be together.


    I know that sounds childish, and as you said I''m still just a kid, but I liked it back when you didn''t thought of me as one. I never once believed you thought of me as just some kid. You treated me with respect, with kindness, and I''m sure that''s how you really felt about me.


    You kept saying to talk to my parents, but I couldn''t. They just don''t care about me. Not at all. They''re too selfish to care about anyone else other then their own interest. I bet they don''t even know I''m waiting at a train station moving away to another city on my own, that''s how selfish they are. But you really did care about me. Not in a way that felt like an adult trying to make some kid feel better like my previous teachers, or a friend who said things to make me feel better and never contact me ever again. I really did feel that you truly cared about me so much. I swore you were going to take me away from this horrible life I am going through.


    I felt cheated by you. I felt betrayed. I felt that you just used me. But that''s not true because I really did felt your loneliness. You''re just like me, Johan. I don''t know about your past because you just won''t talk about it, but I can sense it.


    Maybe you really were uncomfortable and didn''t want to be with me. Maybe you really were scared of being with me and having people look at you suspiciously. But I don''t want to believe that. I want to believe that you were a caring person who wanted to make someone happy. That''s what I wanted to believe, and I wanted to return the favor.


    But I guess in the end, I was just some kid. A kid with a weird dream that we shared. That''s all I have left, that dream that we shared.


    And just like my dreams, I wanted him to come to my rescue, just like how he always comes to rescue the girl, always fighting to be together. He was her hero and I was hoping you''d be my hero.


    "Better not waste that battery," mocked Margaret.


    "Oh, you''re back!" he said as he put away his phone.


    "Am I interrupting something? Maybe you''re talking to your girlfriend behind my back?"


    "Of course not," he told Margaret in a joking manner. "If anyone should be worried, it''s me. Don''t run away with the next man you see."


    "Oh, Johan!" Margaret laughed.


    "Well, now it''s my turn to excuse myself. I''ll be right back."


    Upon leaving his seat and entering the restroom, he pulled out his phone again. Staring at the message, breathing heavily, ''For how long is the past going to haunt me? I just want to move on with my new life.'' He closed Google chat and dragged the app icon on his screen. ''If I continue any more communication, I''m never going to let this go. I''m going to end up in big trouble by being with you. Forgive me Lucy, but this is the right thing to do. I told you what you have to do, so please get help and forget about me, because this can''t go on anymore.'' He dragged the icon to the uninstall section and released it. An empty slot now stood on his home screen.

 Chapter 62

    "I think I know what I want," Johan said as he faced the waiter, "I''ll have the gourmet pork with honey mustard with grilled vegetables on the side, no broccoli please, and some sparkling water with lemon on it."


    "Very good, sir," the waiter responded as he turned to Margaret, "And you, ma''am?"


    "Give me a bacon cheeseburger and a cola."


    A momentarily surprised look was on the waiter''s face before he cleared his throat. "Very well."


    Once the waiter took their menus and left, "That''s quite a surprise coming from you," Johan commented.


    "Were you expecting something fancy? Don''t think that I''m one of these rich kids who eat those tiny portions at super-expensive restaurants. Just give me a burger and I''m happy." Johan laughed. "Is it that funny?"


    "I actually did think you were one of those rich kids. I guess I was wrong."


    Margaret chuckled. "What about you? With your honey-mustard pork chops and grilled vegetables."


    "I seriously wanted that."


    "But not the broccoli, huh? I guess you''re nothing more than a kid."


    ¡°Kid?¡± Johan said with a bit of surprise. "Whose a kid? You''re the one ordering a burger at a restaurant. The last time I had a burger, Lucy bought it for me on a train-" He forcefully stopped himself. After clearing his throat, "Never mind. You''re free to have whatever you want."


    A brief pause of silence occurred between them. Sensing tension arriving, "So, Johan, you''re looking forward to the future. Tell me what are you planning?"


    Johan cleared his throat once again. "I''m going to get my degree in psychology and then get an internship. No, I should get one while I''m still in school."


    "Do you have any idea how to do that?"


    "No, and I haven''t been looking. Now seems like a good time to do that since summer vacation is around the corner. But I wanted to make friends first." He chuckled. ¡°There''s just so much to do, I guess. I feel like I''m trying to catch up.¡±


    "What about your writing?"


    "That''s just a hobby, nothing serious."


    "Can you show me what you have done so far?"


    "I''m a bit embarrassed to share it, especially since I have no plans to actually publish anything. It''s really just for my own amusement."


    "But I''m curious to know what you have because it may be worth getting published. You see, I''m an amateur writer myself and would love to read what you have."


    "No, Margaret. My writing is not good. It''s really more for amusement than anything."


    "Is it non-fiction?"


    "It''s fiction, but nothing more than what you can buy at the airport. Trust me, it''s nothing groundbreaking. It''s just me... you know... venting."


    "Then maybe one day you''ll share it with me?"


    "Perhaps, but don''t bet on it."


    Another brief pause as Margaret noticed Johan tapping the table with his fingers.


    --


    "That was pretty good,¡± complimented Margaret as they left the restaurant.


    "Pretty good?"


    "Well, I did have a bacon cheeseburger. I guess next time I''ll order from the grown-up menu."


    "Next time, huh? So you''re calling it a night?"


    "No, of course not. It''s still too early for that."


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    "It is?" Johan pulled out his phone. "Past nine. Wow, it felt like an eternity in there."


    "Are you kidding? The night''s hardly begun."


    "It has? But if we stay out too late, it''ll be midnight before you know it."


    Margaret cocked her head a bit, "Don''t tell me you were about to call it a night this early."


    Johan rubbed the back of his neck with his palm, "Well, actually, I don''t have anything else planned. After all, if we''re out late, our sleep schedule is going to end up in disarray."


    "So all you had was dinner planned?"


    "Yeah, pretty much."


    "Alright, fine. I get it. Then it''s my turn to take you somewhere, isn''t it?"


    "Now?"


    ¡°Yes, now. Don''t tell you care more about your beauty sleep than our date.¡±


    ¡°Had I known we were going to continue past dinner then I would have accommodated the outing much earlier.¡±


    ¡°Unbelievable. You really are a child, you know.¡°


    An ill feeling ran through Johan as a discomfort had imposed itself upon him. ¡°You know, that really is insulting, being called a kid in such a context. I guess I owe someone a-¡± Once again, he forcefully stopped himself as he straightened his posture. ¡°Very well, you win. Where do you want to go?¡±


    "How about you take me to the beach?"


    "The beach?"


    "The shore is closed but not the shops and the little amusement park by the wayside."


    "The beach..." As if a switch had been turned on, images projected themselves on Johan''s mind. Images of himself in a much happier state. Pleasant evenings as the sun set over the water, laughter, joy, and happiness.


    There was a look of despondency and wonder on his face as Margaret peered through him. "On second thought, maybe we can go somewhere else. So, how about we just head to a movie or something."


    "No," Johan said with conviction. With a smile on his face, "Let''s go to the beach."


    --


    "Norman?" an elderly voice was heard on the other side of the phone. "What are you doing calling me at this hour?"


    "Dad, I need to talk to you."


    "Why the rush? Call me in the morning. I''m trying to get some sleep."


    "Dad, it can''t wait. I really need to tell you something."


    "Norman, I don''t have time to play games. I have to get up early tomorrow for a meeting."


    "I quit."


    "What?¡±


    "I quit the family business."


    "What are you talking about?"


    "I''ve had enough of this life I''ve been living since forever. I''ve had enough of just living to sustain the business while everything around me deteriorates."


    "What is this childish complaining? You know very well that in order for the company to survive, we must give a piece of ourselves."


    "A piece? All my life has been nothing but working to sustain this company. Ever since I was a little boy, I''ve been doing nothing but work for you and this stupid company."


    "Stupid? You take that back!"


    "No, I will not. I had to give up making long-term friends because I was too busy learning how to run the business. I couldn''t go on vacation with what little friends I had in order to prepare myself to become the new owner of your company. I even had to marry a woman I didn''t want to just because of some stupid complication from this merger between the two companies. What in the world was I thinking just obeying your every whim? I''m certain this is illegal in some way."


    "How dare you talk like this? Don''t forget that if you divorce that woman, the merger is over and we''ll lose millions! Don''t you dare!"


    "Not only will I go through the divorce, but I''m also going to break my ties with you and the family. I want out of this whole charade and get my life back."


    "Have you gone insane? You are so close to owning the company. You are about to lose everything you have been working in these past three decades."


    "Three decades that I will never get back. I gave up so much all because you told me that money was everything. I don''t care about riches anymore. I don''t care about the company. I lost everything all because of this soulless pursuit of wealth and power.."


    "This is egregious. Do you understand that you are about to destroy generations worth of hard work so that we, the current generation, may live in luxury?"


    "This company has ruined my life! I should''ve known when I had to marry some stranger that my life was going to crumble. That all changes right now. I''m taking back my life and I''m going to fix all the wrongs that have happened to me!"


    "You fool! Don''t think just because you''re my son that I''m going to allow you to disrespect the company that our great grandfathers worked so hard to build. I''m not afraid of suing you!"


    "Take every penny. Better to live free in poverty than be your rich slave."


    "You are making a mistake! Besides, I have a lot of illegitimate children that would be happy to accept this position. Just you wait till-"


    Norman instantly hung up and hunched forward on the sofa while he rubbed his face. ''This is all my fault! No matter how much I blame my family, my ex-wife, and even my daughter, this is all my fault. But now I got to make things right. I don''t have time to be crying about this. I got to find Lucy. That disgusting woman, abandoning our child. Does she think she''s a toy? I should''ve... No, complaining isn''t going to help. I better check with the police.''


    A few moments after dialing the police department, he is directed to the one in charge of the investigation.


    "What is happening with my daughter?" he asked.


    "We''re doing all we can, sir. Please calm down."


    "How can I calm down when my daughter is missing?"


    "We understand your concern but panicking will only make things worse. Trust us, a missing child is usually found within a few days."


    "A few days? You can''t find her right now? Are you even doing your job?"


    "Sir, we can assure you we will find your daughter but there are procedures involved such as paperwork."


    "My daughter is missing and you are talking about paperwork!?"


    "Your daughter is not the only missing person we have to deal with."


    "I can''t believe this. My taxes are going to a bunch of incompetent fools! Forget it, you worthless maggots. I''m looking for her myself." He hung up the phone and immediately headed out the door.

 Chapter 63

    ''I said I was going to look for her,'' Norman thought to himself, ''But I have no idea where she could be!'' With only Lucy''s address to go by, he drove all around her neighborhood but it soon became apparent that he had no idea where to begin. ''I might as well be searching for a needle in a haystack. She could be anywhere.''


    After spending some time driving, he spotted two police officers talking to a city cleaner at the train station. Upon parking his car and entering the station, "Hey, I need to ask you a question. I need to ask about my daughter."


    "Daughter?" one of the police officers asked. "She wouldn''t happen to be a girl named Lucy, would she?"


    "Yes, exactly. I''m her father, Norman."


    "Well, we tracked her down here to this train station. Apparently, she bought a ticket to Springfield."


    "Springfield? That''s a city in the next state over. Is she planning on boarding the train?"


    "She already has. According to the computer records, she scanned her ticket 15 minutes ago."


    "Then you got to stop that train!"


    "We''ve already alerted the city of Springfield to look out for a minor exiting the train."


    "Just that? Didn''t you read what I reported? She was seeing an older man! She''s probably going to meet him!"


    "Yes, sir, we got the report and are surveying the area for any suspicious person who may approach your daughter."


    "You idiots! He could be on the train for all we know! The Springfield ticket may be a way to divert our attention while he waits for her in some other station."


    "Calm down, sir. I assure you that we''re being vigilant of the trains. Besides, the only thing certain is her destination."


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    "Are you keeping track of the cameras on the trains? On the stations?"


    "We''re trying got get clearance on that."


    "Then how do you know where they will stop? Do you even have police stationed in every station?"


    "That would require more effort than we can handle. It''s practically impossible."


    "You police are worthless! While you are following protocol, some strange man is taking my daughter away! I can''t trust anyone! I got to do things myself."


    --


    "Wow," Margaret said with surprise, "It looks so pretty at night. Look at the lights on the Ferris wheel."


    "Yeah, it does," Johan responded in a somber tone.


    "What''s wrong?"


    "Oh, nothing. Well, let''s get going." As Johan proceeded to walk forward, Margaret wrapped her arm around his. "Margaret what are you doing?"


    "I figured I''d set the mood."


    "Excuse my rudeness but can you please not."


    "Oh, I see. A bit embarrassed.¡± She removed her arm from his. ¡°You''re going to give me a lot to work with, but it''ll be worth it, I''m certain."


    They continued their way toward the amusement park passing by stores with one catching Margaret''s eye. "Might as well get that phone charger dealt with. Let''s get something for your car first."


    Johan looked at the store she was referring to. "Here?" he asked.


    "Of course.¡±


    ¡°But why here?¡±


    ¡°If they sell phones, they''ll sell chargers."


    "Can''t it wait? We''re here to have fun."


    "You need your phone in case of an emergency. You can use my phone for the time being and leave your phone behind to charge."


    "Isn''t that a bit irresponsible? Someone could see it and try to steal it."


    "You have a pretty cheap phone, Johan. Nobody wants that."


    "Come on. That''s not fair. After all, Lucy helped me pick-" He placed his hand on his mouth before another word could escape him. Straightening himself up and flattening his shirt, "Alright, fine, but let''s do it quickly."


    They entered the small phone shop and the familiar atmosphere hit Johan immediately upon stepping in. It wasn''t the same store but the aesthetic was more than enough to keep him on edge. "Let''s just get any charger and get out of here."


    "Oh look at that!" Margaret immediately headed on over to a small glass display. "Look at this phone. This is the new model!" Johan takes a peek to see the same phone that Lucy was equally impressed with. "Maybe I''ll buy it right now," Margaret said enthusiastically as she turned to Johan who was avoiding eye contact.


    "Forget it," Johan said.


    "I''m only kidding. I''m not really going to-"


    "I don''t want to be here."


    "Johan, why do you sound so jumpy?"


    Without responding, Johan immediately exited the store with Margaret following.


    "Johan, are you okay?"


    "Yeah, I''m fine. I just felt sick in there."


    "Oh, that''s too bad. Well, then how about I-"


    "Let''s just go."


    "What about the charger?"


    "I don''t care about the charger. Let''s just move on."


    "Johan, what is going-"


    "Let''s just go!" he said loudly.


    Taken by surprise, she only responded, "Okay..."

 Chapter 64

    "Oh, this is amazing!" Margaret said as they entered the amusement park. "We''re gonna have so much fun here."


    Seeing the vibrant lights, the roller coaster that winded around the area, the stalls with all assortments of snacks, and all the people having a good time, "Yeah..." Johan commented. "I should have a good time here. Let''s have a good time."


    "Then let''s go."


    "What do you want to do first?"


    "How about we ride the roller coaster?"


    "Now? But it''s dark. It''s kind of dangerous, isn''t it? Besides, we just ate. We could get sick and throw up."


    Margaret chuckled. "Johan, you''re always worrying. Why not just let yourself loose every once in a while."


    "I''m just making observations, that''s all."


    "Stop worrying so much." She pulled him forward, "Let''s just go and check it out."


    They arrived at the roller coaster but the attendant was already locking up the gate. "Sorry but the weather''s looking pretty bad right now. Safety precautions, you know."


    "Is that so?" Johan said as he looked up, seeing the clouds becoming dense in the night sky. "Looks like it''s going to rain."


    "But there were no reports of rain tonight," Margaret commented. "Where is this coming from?"


    "Let me check the weather report quickly."


    After a few moments of fiddling with his phone, "It says it''s going to be windy and there''s a 30% chance of rain."


    "Does that mean they''re going to close the carnival early?"


    "Perhaps we should take our leave."


    "No. Let''s just stay until they announce the closure."


    "But what if it''s too late? What if it starts to rain? We''re going to end up soaked if we''re not careful."


    "There you go again, Johan. So what if it starts to rain? We''ll deal with it when it happens."


    "You like to live dangerously, don''t you?"


    "The things I''ve done before don''t compare to running in the rain."


    Johan laughed a bit. "I guess. Well then, let''s continue."


    As they walked around the pier, Johan thought to himself, ''Maybe this isn''t so bad. I''m kind of enjoying myself, and Margaret is a pretty interesting person. I wonder why I never thought of her like this?''


    Margaret eventually spotted a food cart. "Oh look, popcorn. Buy me some, Johan."


    "But we just ate earlier."


    "Johan..."


    "Alright, I get it." They approached the cart when Johan noticed the name on the side. "Pop Magic? Wait a minute, is this part of that new popcorn franchise?"


    "Oh yes," the popcorn man said, "We have some of the same flavors as they are in the shop."


    "Oh, there''s a menu!" Margaret commented as she perused the panel hanging above. "This is interesting. I never heard of something like this."


    "There are only a few recipes here," the popcorn man said, "but the shop has many more."


    "And these are already so interesting. But I already ate, so maybe something light instead." Johan grabbed Margaret by the hand and dragged her away. "What''s going on?" she asked confused.


    "I... I started feeling... sick. I already ate, that must be it. I can''t stomach it."


    "Oh, I see," Margaret responded. "Well, then I''ll buy something for myself."


    She turned around but Johan tugged her once again, "You''re just going to make me... please, let''s not get snacks, or at least not popcorn. How about ice cream instead? There''s another cart just nearby.¡±


    "Okay, I guess that''s fine."


    They continued their exploration of the amusement park and as they took part in some of the attractions, an announcement was heard over the speakerphone. "ATTENTION ALL GUESTS. SUNLIGHT AMUSEMENT IS CLOSING EARLY DUE TO THE CHANGE IN WEATHER. PLEASE PROCEED TO EXIT THE GROUNDS AND THANK YOU FOR VISITING US TONIGHT. PLEASE CHECK OUT THE SUNLIGHT SHOPPING CENTER AS MORE ENJOYMENT CAN BE FOUND THERE."


    "It was bound to happen," Johan said. "I guess it''s officially over."


    "What''s over?"


    "Didn''t you hear the announcement? We can''t stay here."


    "But they said to take our business to the shopping center."


    ¡°Oh... right.¡±


    They exit the area and as soon as they pass the entrance sign, drops of rain started to hit the back of their heads. "Well, here we go," Margaret said excitedly.


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    "And we better go quickly."


    "I''ll do you one better. Let''s race."


    "I don''t think that''s safe."


    "There you go again, Johan, overthinking things."


    Both took off as the rain began to become denser. Margaret shouted with excitement as they raced towards the shopping center. With her arms raised and her legs kicking playfully, it seemed more like she was prancing rather than running. Johan, on the other hand, was in full sprint mode as he put all his energy into reaching his destination. When he looked around and noticed Margaret was nowhere near her, he ran back to her.


    ¡°Sorry. Come on before we get soaked.¡±


    Holding her hand, Johan was sprinting while trying to keep up with her pace. ¡°It won''t be long now. Just hold on for a few more-¡±


    "Johan, where are you going?" he heard her shout from afar.


    Johan stopped in his tracks as he noticed his hand was empty. He turned his attention further away from him seeing Margaret standing on top of a set of stairs with one hand above her head and the other pointing towards a building. "The shopping area is this way." Before he had a chance to figure out what had happened, Margaret ran towards him and grabbed his hand. "Come on, it''s starting to pour."


    Going up the stairs and entering the large doors into the musty entrance area, Margaret said, "Well, we escaped the worse of it but we''re practically damp."


    "Right. I would''ve been bad if we were soaked."


    "Wouldn''t want to walk around with wet socks all night, huh?"


    "Yeah, ha ha..." Johan replied somberly.


    After buying a pair of towels to dry themselves with, they began to walk around the shopping area. Margaret minded herself with window shopping, looking at all the stores and their wares, while Johan was preoccupied with his own thoughts. ''Maybe it was a bad idea to come to the beach. No, I''m just letting my feelings take over. I have to remember that I''m putting my past behind me. Doesn''t matter how many times I''ve come here, that''s all behind me now. I''m starting a new life, perhaps with Margaret. I should be more respectful. I bet I''m acting like a fool in front of her. I have to clear my mind and just enjoy myself.''


    "Oh look," Margaret interrupted his thoughts. "This is perfect."


    Johan surmised that she was pointing at an umbrella in a box outside one of the stores. "It is raining right now, and I did leave my umbrella at the car. The umbrella I bought when I went to the zoo with..." He shook his head. "If you want the umbrella, go ahead and-" before he could finish, he realized that Margaret was nowhere near him.


    "Johan, over here," she called out to him now wearing a hat. "What do you think?"


    "Where... where did you get that?"


    "Once I spotted this, I knew I had to get it. Look at how wide the brim is."


    "No, not that hat."


    "Oh no, not this time. I''m going to buy it, Johan."


    "No, please. Put that hat away."


    "Oh, look at this!" A plastic flower caught her eye as she took it and placed it in her right ear. "If it wasn''t raining, it''d be perfect as beachwear. Don''t you think?"


    "Margaret, please, put that hat down. Don''t buy it."


    "No no no, Johan. I told you, not this time. You''ve been restricting me lately. Won''t buy me popcorn and not make plans after dinner. This time, I''m treating myself."


    He forcefully grabbed the hat from her. "Not this hat."


    "Johan, what are you doing?"


    Followed by pulling out the flower from her ear. "Knock it off, Margaret."


    "Knock what off? I was just putting on a hat."


    "You can''t buy that hat. Just leave it here."


    He put the hat back in the rack, only for her to pick it up again. "There''s nothing wrong with this hat, and I don''t care if you have a problem with me wearing it. I''m going to buy it, no matter what you say. I''m taking it to the counter right now."


    "Give me that hat!" Johan snatched the hat but Margaret refused to let go.


    "Johan, what is up with you? You''re acting like a little kid."


    "I don''t want to see that hat at all!"


    "Johan, stop it. You''re making a scene."


    "This hat... just don''t buy it."


    "Why not? What is it about this hat that is bothering you?"


    "Because I was thinking of buying it for her, that''s what! Lucy wants this hat and I want to-" The tugging instantly stopped and his grip loosened. "Oh my gosh..." Not another word was uttered as he stepped out of the shop and into the main corridor.


    Stumbling out of the store, nearly tripping himself, he managed to find his balance as he leaned against a nearby pillar.


    "Why?¡± he said to himself. ¡°Why can''t I forget about her? Why can''t I just move on with my life!? Just leave me alone! This was a mistake. I should''ve never come to this beach. I should''ve just... just... I don''t know. I don''t know."


    Clenching his fist and exhaling as he gritted his teeth, he stood upright and turned around to see Margaret looking at him confused.


    Straightening his shirt, with a smile on his face, "Sorry about that. I just thought it looked rather silly on you. I was saving you the embarrassment. But hey, if you want to embarrass yourself..." A disgruntled look had appeared on Margaret''s face. Despite this, he continued, "You know, how about we just call it a night, you know? I''m getting kind of stressed, you know. I mean, midterms are coming up. I really should get to-"


    "Midterms are over, Johan.."


    "Oh, really? Wow, time sure does fly by fast, you know. But still, we have school tomorrow, don''t we? As much fun as we''re having, we shouldn''t neglect our studies, you know. You know?"


    "Johan..."


    "Yes, Margaret?"


    "Knock it off."


    "What do you mean?"


    "The whole charade. You''re faking all this."


    "No, no. You''re misinterpreting things. I''m having a good time. It''s just that, I''m a bit uptight. That''s just the kind of man I am. I mean, if you don''t want to... date... a man like me, then maybe this isn''t going to work out then."


    "Or is it that you still love Lucy?"


    A brief display of discomfort was on him before he quickly replaced it with a smile. "Lucy is in the past. I''m looking forward to the future."


    "Johan, you miss Lucy, don''t you?"


    "No. Of course not. Why would I? She''s just a child... as in... uhh... personality wise... which isn''t necessarily true in her case. But still, you know, maturity is a completely different subject. That''s it, right?"


    "Johan, did Lucy dump you?"


    "Dump? That would insinuate that we were in a relationship and that she ended it. There was no such thing at all to begin with. Nothing at all of the kind."


    "But you still have feelings for her."


    "Margaret, why are we bringing up a person you hardly know? She''s nothing to me. Nothing at all. I''m a good person you know. I don''t break the law. I would never think of doing something crazy that was totally inappropriate."


    "You''re rambling now. I have no idea what you are going on about. What is going on with you? Are you having a breakdown?"


    "No, I''m fine. I''m fine, really!"


    "You don''t look fine. You look like you''re about to break into a million pieces."


    "Margaret, I''m okay. I''m just stressed out a bit. I mean, this is my first time being on a... a..."


    "A date."


    "Yeah, that. You know, I''m just... just trying to... move along... and..."


    She could see his body shaking, his eyes with a serious expression on them, and the smile he was projecting was now becoming unnerving to her. "Johan, I don''t want to pry into your business, but I think you better tell me what''s going on."


    "Margaret, trust me. I''m just nervous that''s all. You know me, I''m shy. Very shy."


    "I don''t know who this Lucy is but it''s clear that you are in love with her."


    "Why are you bringing her up again? You don''t even know her. Stop assuming things, okay? I''m a good person. I wouldn''t do anything bad or disgusting, as you put it. I''m not in love with anyone. Not even you, okay?"


    "So you''re not in love with this Lucy girl?"


    "No."


    "Then why are you crying?"


    It took him a moment before he raised his arm to touch his face to feel the cold and wet presence of tears. "No, that''s just rain...." he said with a quiver as he sloppily walks over to the pillar to support himself. ¡°It''s just the rain... that she so loved to run into.¡±

 Chapter 65

    ¡°Margaret, I don''t know what to say anymore. I don''t know what to do.¡±


    ¡°You can start by telling me what''s going on with you.¡±


    ¡°I''ve tried so many times, but I just don''t know how to say it without pushing away any more of my friends. Why can''t I just speak my mind?¡±


    ¡°Why do you believe you''re restricted? Why can''t you just say what you want to say?¡±


    ¡°Because... because... I have fallen in love with Lucy. There is no denying it. I''m in love with her. I don''t know why and I can''t find a logical explanation either. The only thing I can do is just accept it, but I can''t. I''m not supposed to. I can''t fall in love with Lucy. And this is complete misery.¡±


    ¡°Again, you''re not making any sense, but by the sound of it, you seem too afraid to actually make any sense of it. But as I said before, why not just be with her? Why all this drama? Why all this pain you are inflicting on yourself?¡±


    ¡°Because I keep being told that I can''t. I can''t be with her.¡±


    "Who does? Who keeps telling you this?¡±


    ¡°Everyone. Everyone I talk to. Everyone I call a friend. Every person I''ve ever known. There''s no winning here. They keep telling me that I shouldn''t be with her, that I''m actually hurting her. I don''t see what''s the big deal but maybe they''re seeing something I''m blind to. Maybe they''re right, but the reason is out of my grasp, so I listened and kept my distance, but this decision is filling me with so much grief.¡±


    ¡°This is getting even more confusing. How can your presence be hurting her? You''re one of the most courteous people I''ve met in my life. You wouldn''t dare hurt a fly.¡±


    ¡°I''m just as confused as you are, because when I was with Lucy, those brief moments I was with her, all seemed right in the world. She told me that she had never felt happier before. Not even her parents are giving her happiness. I can''t read her mind but I felt a connection with her because I was the same as well. All the agony, all the anger, all the anguish, all of it extinguished when I was with her, and I''d like to think that she felt the same.¡±


    ¡°So she''s having trouble at home?¡±


    ¡°I don''t know all the details but apparently so. That''s why I told her to talk to her parents instead of seeing me. I felt like she was using me as a coping mechanism. That her strained relationship with her parents was what was driving her to me. That''s why I urged her to talk to her parents and stop seeing me. I felt that was the right choice.¡±


    ¡°Wait, is that what you told her? To talk to her parents? But is she safe?¡±


    ¡°Safe?¡±


    ¡°I mean, did you meet her parents? Are they abusing her?¡±


    ¡°Abuse? What?¡±


    ¡°Johan, she could be in danger. Her parents may be violent.¡±


    ¡°Violent? What? No. She didn''t show any signs of violence. She didn''t have bruises or anything.¡±


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    ¡°Then perhaps she''s being verbally and emotionally abused. I don''t think you should have told her that.¡±


    ¡°Oh my gosh, why didn''t I think of that? She just said she was being ignored. I didn''t figure they were doing anything heinous.¡±


    ¡°Well, you know the situation more than I do so maybe you are right. Maybe she is just being ignored. But I guess at this point, she might as well just move out of her parent''s home..¡±


    ¡°What do you mean?¡±


    ¡°I don''t know what the situation is but I figured the best solution is to move out. I don''t know if you are still in contact with her but if you are, maybe you should convince her to apply for a dorm or an apartment. If she can''t afford a place, I''m sure she can become roommates.¡±


    ¡°Oh gosh, no. I can''t even tell her that either. She can''t move out of her house. Not right now.¡±


    ¡°I don''t see why not. Does she not go to our college?¡±


    ¡°No. That''s not it. She can''t move out... and I can''t tell you why.¡±


    Unable to face Margaret any further, Johan turned around. So much disarray was wreaking havoc on his mind that Margaret couldn''t help but notice his defeated demeanor. She grabbed his hand where she noticed its uncontrollable trembling. Holding firmly onto it, ¡°What are you afraid of? Johan, why are you so scared of revealing this girl?¡± Johan just stood in silence as she let go.


    As Johan stood by one of the large windows of the shopping center, watching the rain continuing to pour, he saw his reflection drowning in the river of tears from his face, being buried by the tapping of the rain.


    ¡°This date is over,¡± Margaret said, "but it''s too early to go home." Confused, Johan turned around. ¡°Get in your car and go to Lucy.¡±


    ¡°Margaret, I know I haven''t explained myself but trust me when I tell you I can''t see her.¡±


    ¡°Hey, here''s an idea you should try. How about you turn off your brain and listen to your heart.¡±


    ¡°What?¡±


    ¡°Turn off your brain and listen to your heart. If I said something that offended you, caused you to stay away from this girl, and made you feel like this, then I apologize. I''m quite vain, maybe selfish, but I''m not heartless. As much as I wanted to be with you, that''s never going to happen. I can''t have your heart because it belongs to someone else. So forget whatever I said, or whatever anyone else said, that made you feel like this. Listen to your heart. Disregard the world, just listen to your heart.¡±


    Johan was bewildered with emotion right now as her words struck a chord with him. ¡°Listen to my heart?¡±


    ¡°Do what you think is best; what you believe is the right thing to do.¡±


    As if some force had come and swept away his anxiety, Johan felt a sense of enlightenment. The heavy burden in his spirit lifted away when he stood up straight. The clouds on his mind had parted and light beamed within him. ¡°The right thing to do? What is the right thing to do? The right thing to do... is to make her happy. The right thing to do is to make Lucy happy. And her happiness was the same happiness that we''d both been longing for. For so long...¡±


    ¡°Then give her a call then. I''m sure she''ll be happy to hear from you, and maybe you can spend the rest of the evening with her.¡°


    ¡°Margaret, I... don''t know what to say.¡±


    "Just tell her how you feel."


    "No, I meant to you. I don''t think I''ve ever thought about it but, perhaps for so long, this is what I wanted. To hear something like this. I guess I wanted someone to give me an answer, any answer. Margaret... thank you."


    ¡°Don''t mention it. Besides, I''m still jealous of Lucy so I''m not too thrilled about this. So just go already. Don''t worry about me. I''ll just get a ride home or take the train.¡±


    ¡°Train?¡± In that instant, his elation had taken a turn as a great shock emitted through his entire being. ¡°Oh no. The email!¡± Johan immediately pulled out his phone. As soon as he unlocked it, the screen switched to a blank screen with the battery icon. ¡°I ran out of battery!¡±


    ¡°What''s going on?¡±


    ¡°I got an email from Lucy earlier. I can''t recall what it said but I remember she mentioned something about being on a train! I think she''s running away!¡±


    ¡°I take it that''s bad. Do you want to use my phone?¡±


    ¡°Yes, please!¡± She reached into her bag and handed him her phone, ¡°No, wait, I can''t use your phone! I can''t use anyone''s phone!¡± He paused momentarily to take a deep breath. ¡°I''m sorry Margaret but thank you all the same.¡± Turning around, he bolted straight out the door and into the barrage of water pouring from the sky, holding his blazer tightly around his body as he raced toward his car.

 Chapter 66

    The rain reached its heaviest, showing no signs of relenting, but Johan kept driving as if his life depended on it. Whether it was a miracle or the old charging dock still had some life left before finally dying, as long as it had enough charge to read the email before dying again, he was thankful for it. Finally realizing the error of his ways, he continued his drive on the highway.


    Arriving at the train station in the city, with his umbrella in hand, he ran towards the usual spot only to find it empty. Not a soul was present in the entire train station. A panic hits him as thoughts of terrible possibilities run through his mind. Blame and agony were rearing itself, but his determination didn''t allow him to give up. ¡°She probably stopped at the beach. Maybe she''s waiting for me there.¡±


    Returning back to the beach, climbing the slippery steps as fast as he could, he arrived at the platform. It was just as empty as the one in the city with the exception of wet footprints left behind. ¡°Could one of these footprints be hers? Did she board the last train? Did I barely miss her? Was I too late? Or maybe they aren''t, and I''m here early. Maybe the next train coming, she''ll be there. Or maybe... maybe... she already disappeared.¡±


    He walked forward toward the large opening area where Lucy once ran with excitement to see the sun setting over the ocean for the first time. The rain was so heavy that the area was now a tiny lake as Johan''s shoes were deep in. ¡°The love of my life,¡± he uttered to himself but the rain drowned out his voice. He continued even louder, ¡°how could I have been so foolish? This is all my fault. I am an idiot. How could I listen to everyone else by myself? Why did I trust everyone when even they couldn''t give me an answer? I shouldn''t have listened. They don''t know me. They don''t know who I am. They only make assumptions about me. They never cared about me, only their own self-interests! This is all their fault.¡± Another train was passing by, adding to the loud noise that further drowned out his voice, causing him to speak even louder. ¡°No, this is all my fault. I should''ve stood up on my own two feet. I should''ve been making my own decisions instead of letting everyone tell me what to do. I''m in love with Lucy. I''m in love with that girl. I don''t care what anyone thinks anymore. I don''t care about your stupid opinions. I don''t care if she''s younger than me by a decade. I''m in love with her. I love you Lucy. I love you so much. And I''m sorry. I''m sorry I couldn''t do anything for you. If only I had a second chance, I would declare my love and tell you that I want to be with you forever. I would hug you and never let go. Not even a thousand people would pry us apart. Lucy, I love you! I always have and I always will!¡± The weight of his stress caused his knees to falter and drop to the ground.


    His tears were joining the raindrops as they joined the small river that his hands were dipping in. But with determination even though he didn''t know where it came from, he got back up on his feet. "How many times have I beaten myself up? How many times have I blamed myself? Yes, this is all my fault, but crying won''t do anything. Margaret is right, I''m not a man. I''m just a child. I''m still that child from high school. That pathetic fool who got too comfortable with acquiescing. I''ve had enough. That stops now, and this time I mean it. Even if I have to push what little friends I have left, I will no longer be pushed around anymore. Lucy, I''m going to find you. I''ll spend the rest of my life if I have to. I have nothing anymore. Everything was taken away from me, and you''re my everything. I don''t care about college, or my grades, or my future. I don''t care about my present state or my current friends. I don''t care about my past either. The only thing that mattered to me is you, Lucy. Only you! Please, wait for me! Wait for me Lucy! Don''t disappear. Not like this."


    "Johan..." A quivering voice was heard a distance away, but even with the rain battering him, it rang as clearly as if it were on an empty hallway. It was such a familiar voice that Johan couldn''t help but look at the train behind, the doors wide open, and a single passenger sitting on the seats watching him.


    Even in the dimness of the train''s worn-out lights, she shone so brightly to him as she clutched her chest.


    "Johan..." Lucy uttered once again with a look of desperation. It was such a sight for Johan, illusion or not, that he was compelled to move his feet and propel himself against the tiny ocean beneath him.


    "LUCY!" he shouted as his feet created waves. His determination did not make him immune to slipping, but he would fight for his composure to be with the one he pined for.


    He reached out his arm as he neared the train. She got off her seat and reached out hers. Their hands open to interlock themselves into each other only achieved slapping the train doors as they closed between them. A ghastly face of complete and utter shock was displayed to each other as the train began accelerating. Johan raced alongside, afraid that this was the last time he was going to see her. Her banging on the door was futile as he slipped, nearly falling in front of the moving train. He willed his inertia to pull him back and staggered away from the now-empty train tracks. The image of Lucy was out of his sight heading off into the darkness and the only thing that remained was the twinkle of the train''s many lights merging into a single speck.


    Up on his feet, striding down the stairway, and back into his car, he returned to the highway. He had no idea where the next train station was located. His charger was officially dead furthering the difficulty of reaching the next train station. Still, with determination in his heart, Johan darted through the highway, with only the glint of the train tracks by the side of the highway guiding him. But even this would betray him as the tracks took a turn, no longer parallel to the highway. The darkness of the night now obscuring any remaining leads, all he could do was continue to move forward until he reached an exit ramp.


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    Back on the streets, he parked his car to get his bearings. "Lucy, I''m coming for you. Please, just wait for me. It won''t be long. I just need to figure out where the train station is. There''s a chance I could get lost, but I''ll further lose you if I don''t take action right now. All I can do now is just trust my instincts and brace myself."


    Continuing his search, as he approached an intersection, a loud familiar horn in the distance was heard as he felt the rumbling of the ground. With his face lit up, he followed the origin of the sound to reach an overpass. A row of lights in the distance moving in the darkness had given him hope once again as train tracks would eventually reveal themselves.


    It was a mix of desperation and carelessness with some audacity and remorse that had him drive right into the tracks where he continued his race for the one he loved. "I''m coming Lucy. Please, just let me see you one more time. I have so much to tell, and so much to apologize for. Please, don''t disappear."


    Finally arriving at a train station in this unfamiliar city, getting off the tracks and into the parking lot, grabbing his umbrella, and exiting his car, he stepped into the platform where a train had just stopped to load and unload passengers. There were only a few passengers leaving the train and not a single one was Lucy. He surveyed the area around the terminal in search of her, a task made easy as the train station was rather small enough for him to run circles multiple times, but not a single sign of the girl he loved.


    When it dawned on him that circling the area was futile, he stopped and took a seat on a bench. "Where are you, Lucy? I would''ve sworn you would exit on the next stop. Did you not think I would come for you? Did I not make myself clear that I wanted to see you again? Or maybe you''re not in this train station. I don''t know this city, I don''t know this particular station. Maybe you did get off but I''m in the wrong place. Or maybe... just maybe... you never got off at all..." He looked beyond the tracks into the distance. Despite the row of lights creating a glow that reached the farthest he could see, it might as well have been a void of darkness that not even light could not return from. The abyss in front of him was staring back at him, the last train now becoming nothing more than a dot consumed by the darkness, just like his hopes and dreams. And in that train may have been the only girl he truly loved.


    ¡°Not like this. Not like this! I can''t give up! Not after coming this far! I''ll find you, Lucy! I''ll find you and let you know how I really feel!¡± His adrenaline returned and he got back on his feet. ¡°No more feeling bad for myself. No more crying worthless tears. No more being such a coward. I don''t have anything to lose. I have nobody I care about. I have no reason to turn back. I can only move forward. If I have to spend the rest of my life searching for you, I''ll do so, even until my last breath.¡±


    He turned around and began running back only to slip again, saved by him reaching out his arms to soften the blow of the impact.


    Yet, even with this maneuver, a part of his head did hit the ground, enough to daze him. Holding his head from the minor pain, he noticed the umbrella fly off his hand but his vision was temporarily blurred, he could not see where it landed. Nonetheless, he managed to get up to his feet only to get back down as a minor sting was on his knees. His vision was returning to normal as the fuzz around him was clearing up but the rain also blocked his view, making it much more difficult to discern much. He closed his eyes and rubbed them, shook his head, and tried once again. It apparently worked as his vision was now clear enough that the rain was no longer a detriment, but to his surprise, the umbrella was nowhere to be found, nor was the rain for that matter. It was still falling like daggers from above, but no drop touched him, except for a few on his hand.


    He lifted his head to see the umbrella above him being held up by Lucy.


    With ears in her eyes, "I don''t know where I am," she said, "I was scared of moving farther away because I didn''t know what was beyond. I figured you would know all the stops and be here sooner. You dummy. You should get out more."


    She wiped her tears with her other hand and Johan couldn''t help but just embrace her right then and there as he wrapped his arms around her and held her tightly. Fearing he would fly away from her, she held on to him daring to never let go.


    "Lucy, I''m sorry for hurting you so much. But the truth is I never wanted to leave your side. I was too afraid to admit my feelings, but I never realized that I was doing more harm than good.¡± He pulled himself away from her while still holding onto her shoulders. ¡°Hurting you was the last thing I wanted to do, and it will be the last time I do because I love you. I love you so much. I never want to be away from you. Not in a million years. I am in love with you, and I will never again regret feeling this way for you. I love you, Lucy."


    With her tears returning, Lucy smiled. "Of course, silly. We''ve been chasing each other for centuries. We were meant to be together."


    "No. That''s just a fairy tale. It''s you who I am in love with, not some fabrication from my mind. I don''t want to dream about falling in love anymore. I don''t want to fall in love with a figment from my imagination. I am in love with you, Lucy, and only you."


    This unprecedented response from him had given her a strong emotion that fired up inside of her. A powerful emotion that took control of her that she nor Johan were prepared when she leaned in fast and gave him a kiss. Before she knew what had happened, she pulled herself away from him and was no less surprised than he was.


    He pulled her in again and passionately shared his kiss, one longer and perhaps more passionate. There was no resistance, no anxiety, no fear. Their turbulent emotions had been cindered away by the fire that burned within them. They closed their eyes, allowing their spirits to embrace each other, and indulging in the happiness they have been searching for so long.

 Chapter 67

    ¡°You turned off your brain?¡± Lucy asked confused.


    ¡°That''s how she said it,¡± Johan replied. ¡°I don''t know what I did but apparently it seemed to work, though I feel I was quite reckless in doing so.¡±


    ¡°I figured after everything you did to get here. You''re completely soaked, you could''ve caught a cold.¡±


    ¡°That''s why I have the car heater on at full blast. I''ll be parked here for some time since I can''t drive with it on this high of a setting, but I''d rather not drive with wet socks on anyway."


    Lucy looked at the back of the car seeing her sweater damped but not as drenched as Johan''s blazer sitting right next to it. Being so close to the heater, Johan''s shirt was beginning to dry out while his pants would require far more time. She rubbed her arm, feeling her shirt hardly touched by the rain. ¡°So what happens next?¡± She asked.


    Johan stared at lights from outside permeating the fogged windshield for a moment before answering, ¡°I don''t know myself. This is a queer situation we''ve gotten ourselves into. But considering everything we''ve gone through, all the pain, the sorrow, the idea of being neglected by those we trusted and love, it surely is an experience to finally be ourselves, even if it is a private matter. But as I said before, I regret everything I have done up to this point. I felt like I was not allowed to be myself due to the circumstances, but in the end, I was just playing the role of the jester for everyone else. At least that''s how it feels. I''d like to think my friends meant well, but at this point, I really don''t know who to trust anymore.¡±


    ¡°But you have friends, right?¡±


    ¡°I guess, but I can''t talk to them, at least not anymore. I tried to, but it always ended up with them leaving me. That''s why I stopped making friends. What few I had left either left me eventually or are about to. I guess this is my life now.¡±


    As Johan was in thought, he unknowingly placed his hand on the gear shift which was followed by Lucy placing hers on top of his. He turned his head to find her smiling. ¡°You can always talk to me. I''ll listen to any problems you have. I won''t judge you. Just as I can talk to you because I know you''ll understand what I''m going through.¡±


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    Johan placed his other hand on top of hers. ¡°Thank you, Lucy.¡±


    ¡°But, Johan,¡± she removed her hand. ¡°What does this make of us? Are we officially a couple?¡±


    Johan took a moment to breathe before answering, ¡°I know we''ve reconciled but a decision hasn''t been made. I confessed my love for you but that doesn''t make it official. I want to be with you forever, never to leave you again, but I can''t just make this decision on a whim. I know at least that much. We''re going to have to think about this.¡±


    ¡°We? But I already-¡±


    ¡°No, Lucy. You can''t just make this decision right now, especially after all we''ve been through. But let''s not worry about this for the time being. Our clothes should be dry enough. How about we just go home tonight? I could use some rest after all this madness.¡±


    ¡°Going home to an empty apartment doesn''t sound like a good idea to me.¡±


    ¡°In that case, would you like me to accompany you?¡±


    ¡°You would?¡±


    ¡°Of course. I told you, I''m never going to let feel sorrow ever again. I don''t want you to return to a cold and isolated home. I''ll go with you and even stay with you all night if you want.¡±


    Lucy nodded and smiled. ¡°I would like that.¡±


    Johan turned down the heat and wiped the foggy windows with his hand. Lucy did the same for hers revealing the rain''s intensity now decreasing. It was clear enough to notice a frantic man running around in the parking lot.


    Both of them looked at each other with confusion. ¡°He must be quite crazy to be out in the right like this. I bet that''s what I look like when I turn off my brain. I don''t think I''ll be turning it off any time soon.¡± Lucy chuckled as he turned on the headlights. This got the crazed man''s attention who turned to them.


    ¡°Oh, he saw us. We better go before he comes here and-¡±


    ¡°Dad?¡± Lucy uttered. She leaned in close but eventually unlocked the door and stepped outside.


    ¡°Dad, is that you?¡±


    ¡°Lucy?¡± Said the man blinded by the lights.


    ¡°It is you!¡±


    Johan turned off the lights and when the man got his eyesight back, the first thing he saw was Lucy standing next to a car he did not recognize. ¡°Lucy?¡± His eyes darted to the other side where Johan was standing. ¡°Lucy, get away from that car.¡±


    ¡°Dad, what are you doing here?¡±


    ¡°What are you doing to my daughter?¡± Norman said as he walked towards Johan.


    ¡°Hold on, Sir. There''s been a misunderstanding,¡± said Johan.


    ¡°You better let her go right now!¡±


    ¡°Wait, hear me out...¡± But before he could say another word, Norman''s fist flew right into his face.

 Chapter 68

    "It''s not what you think," said Johan as he blocked another attack.


    "I know where this is going, you pervert!" Norman replied as he swung his arm toward Johan''s face.


    "Dad, please," Lucy shouted. "Just listen to us."


    As Norman went for another attack, Johan saw an opening to push him away causing his feet to slip and fall on the wet ground. Norman goes in to finish him off but is stopped when Lucy got between the two. "Dad, what are you doing? Calm down."


    "Get away from him. I won''t let him take you away."


    "He was going to drive me home."


    "He''s lying. He''s going to kidnap you."


    Johan got to his feet, ¡°There''s been a misunderstanding."


    "Shut up, you pervert!" Norman said as he attempted to grab him again.


    Lucy got between them once again and pushed her father away. "Stop hurting him. You''re not thinking straight." This gesture from his daughter had an effect on him as he stopped his onslaught.


    "Are you okay? Did he hurt you?" Lucy asked Johan.


    "Yeah, I''m fine," Johan replied.


    "Lucy," Norman said after calming down, "what are you doing with this man? You know you''re not supposed to be talking to strangers."


    "What stranger? He''s been my friend for some time now."


    "But what are you doing late at night? I went to your mother''s place and you were not there. Why are you buying a train ticket in the middle of the night and running off to unknown city with a strange man?"


    "He is not a stranger, he''s my friend, and I wasn''t running away with him. I was running away by myself, but he managed to find me."


    "Lucy, you got to understand how I feel right now, seeing my only daughter with a strange man."


    "If anyone is a stranger, it''s you!"


    "What?"


    "I don''t recall a father treating their daughter as an employee. I don''t recall a father demanding an appointment from their own family. I don''t recall a father missing their daughter''s birthdays or their graduation. You might as well not be my father but a complete stranger!"


    Norman froze in place as her words sent an unnerving displeasure into his very spirit. "Johan, you''re getting a bruise on your face,¡± Lucy said still tending to Johan.


    "Yeah, but I''m fine." Johan replied.


    "I have some cream that could work in my bag. Let me get."


    Johan sat on the passenger side as Lucy went into the back to get her duffle bag. Once she found it, she turned her attention back to Johan. ¡°Here''s the cream. Let me apply it.¡±


    ¡°I can apply it myself. Besides, I got wet again.¡±


    "Alright, if you insist.¡±


    All this transpired as Norman watched, seeing Lucy being so caring and concerned for a man he hardly knew but she knew too well. He turned around and started walking away but stopped when he heard footsteps approaching him.


    "I told him to go home," Lucy told her father. Norman turned his attention to the car backing up from the parking spot and eventually driving off but not before Johan waved at Lucy. She waved back as the car exited the parking lot.


    ¨C


    "I''m sorry that I yelled at you," Lucy said as they drove down the highway.


    "No, don''t apologize," Norman said as he turned off the windshield wipers. "I understand now. In fact, I should be the one apologizing. I now finally realize the error of my ways. My great-grandfather''s company was passed on to my grandfather, then to my father and will soon be passed on to me. We have all been devoted to keeping the company going, but in order to achieve this, we had to sacrifice ourselves to it. My grandfather always said that poverty was the worse fate a person could be cursed with and he wanted to make sure we were never poor. However, what was once a way to survive has now become nothing but greed. When I was your age, my father told me that I must work harder to keep the company going and it was my life''s devotion to keeping it going, but in the end I''ve realized that I''ve given up too much of my life devoted to something so arbitrary.


    "He wanted me to quit school and work for him when I was your age. I never had a high school graduation or went to college. I didn''t have any friends or went on dates. It was all about the survival of the company and obeying my father. He kept telling me that money was everything and that poverty is misery. It didn''t help that we were surrounded by luxury, so we were spoiled. He didn''t want this life of ours to end, and neither did I. But it wasn''t until I was asked to marry a woman I hardly met that I started realizing that something was wrong."


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    "You mean, mom?"


    "Yes. By the time I married her, I was in my late-20''s and I had to become a family man in order to inherit the company. But the choice wasn''t mine. I had to marry the daughter of a CEO who owned another company and this marriage would lead to a merger between two companies. That woman was extremely spoiled. Not that I wasn''t spoiled myself but I was disciplined, your mother was not educated in such things. She was a party girl to say the least. She didn''t want to be held down but her family insisted she get married and have children believing that was going to finally snap her out of this childish state she''s still in."


    "You never wanted to marry mom?"


    "Not at first. I''d thought it could work out, maybe we could be a loving couple after marriage, but the reality was I just married her because I was ordered to do so. I was told to marry her for the good of the company, and at the time, I was still obedient with no questions asked. But the marriage was a disaster. She was too outgoing and a hard drinker. She just wanted to spend my money and not take any responsibilities in the business. I complained to my father and her parents but all he said was that it was my responsibility. What responsibility? She''s supposed to be an adult. It all came to a head when I discovered that she was having an affair with multiple men. I tried confronting her about it but she just didn''t care. She just doesn''t care about anyone but herself. To think this woman was making me miserable, and even after giving birth to our daughter, she was still acting very immature.


    "I was so angry that I wanted a divorce, and our parents were furious with me to even think about it, but we separated regardless of what they think. I just want this divorced over with. I''m still fighting with both parents. They demand I return to that horrible life, it disgusts me that all they care about is their money. They don''t even care about their granddaughter, even decrying me for not giving them a proper heir, as if this was some kind of royal family in the dark ages. What is wrong with them! I can''t believe they would fight to give that woman custody over-"


    "Dad!"


    Norman snapped back to reality as he noticed his hands were red from gripping the steering wheel so much. "Sorry. I lost my train of thought."


    "So what you''re saying is that you left the company?"


    "Not yet. I''m still under some contract I don''t remember signing. I''m right now fighting to get out of it. I''m still technically a partial owner."


    "So why did you keep insisting I work for you? Why did you keep saying I should quit school and devote myself to the company if you regret doing that?"


    "At the time, I was just obeying orders. It''s only now that I''ve opened my eyes and woke up to the reality of my situation. But at the same time, this is all I''ve known. I don''t know anything about being a father. I don''t know what the first thing is about being a husband either. All I know is how to work and do business. Nobody taught me to be anything else, so I wouldn''t know what to say. I''m sorry Lucy but you''re right. I might as well be a stranger to you."


    A sight she had never seen before had developed in front of her eyes. Seeing her father remorseful, his face displaying agony, his body posture showing defeat. For so long his humanity was desperate to emerge, hiding the cold-hearted man he was before, and was finally revealing how he truly felt after so long.


    "No, Dad. I''m sorry for saying that. You''re not a stranger. You''re my father."


    "But I''ve ignored you for so long. It never occurred to me that I was so neglectful until you told me that you were seeing an older man. I got so scared when you said that. I was mortified when you were not at your mother''s house. When I learned that you bought a train ticket to run away, I felt like I was about to lose a part of myself and it would be all my fault. How could I call myself your father when this all happened."


    "But Dad, you''re here now. And even if I did run away to another city, now I know you would come looking for me. Maybe I would have been mad, but at least I would know that you really did care about me. If you really were a terrible father, I would still be in that train, or at least going home with Johan instead of you. You wouldn''t know that I was running away. You wouldn''t even know that I existed." She stopped herself as she started wiping the tears emerging. Noman reached into the glove compartment to offer her handkerchief. She accepted and wiped her tears away. "Thank you for looking for me. Thank you for acknowledging that I exist."


    With a serious look in his eyes, "Do not thank me, because that''s the worst thing a father can do to their child. If anything, I should be apologizing a thousand times and more, and never expect an apology for any one of them."


    "But I do forgive you, Dad."


    "Do you actually forgive me?"


    "I don''t want to hate you. I just want to love you, like a daughter should love her father. Like a father should love their daughter."


    Norman exhaled. "Will you really forgive your father? Will you forgive this flawed human before you who doesn''t deserve any mercy?"


    Lucy unbuckled her seat belt and gave her father a big hug. It was so unexpected that the car swerved. As he rectified the car with one hand, he gave Lucy a hug with the other.


    When Lucy returned to her seat and Norman composed himself, "Come home with me, Lucy. I promise I won''t see you as an employee anymore. I refuse to work for that stupid company from here on. I don''t care about their stupid contracts. I will quit the first thing in the morning. Come live with me, I will make sure you get everything you need from here on."


    "But what about mom?"


    "The last time I saw her, she did not change. Your mother is not a very good person and doesn''t seem to be interested in being a parent. She''s not taking care of you at all."


    "But even still, she''s my mom. I can''t just abandon her, even if she did abandon me."


    "Lucy, your mother just wants to do whatever she wants. She has no sense of responsibility. She didn''t even know you were gone when I went and visited you. Do you understand? Your mother has practically abandoned you."


    "But I just can''t leave her. I got to at least say something to her."


    "I''m telling you, your mother wouldn''t care at all."


    "Even so, it''s not fair to just pass her off like this."


    "Lucy, I''ve known her longer than you have. I''m telling you-"


    "I don''t care what you have to say. I''m not going to abandon her. I want to talk to her, and I want you to be there with me."


    "I have already made myself clear about this. I have nothing to say to her."


    "But you have to. Regardless of whether you like her or not, you''re both my parents. All three of us are connected. Abandoning her would be no different than leaving me on that train."


    After a few moments of thought about this, "Okay, you win. Then let''s head over to your mother''s apartment and talk about this."

 Chapter 69

    "Maybe she''s out looking for me?" Lucy said after knocking on her apartment door for the third time.


    "Then call her."


    When she dialed her mother''s number, a faint jingle could be heard from inside the apartment.


    "Huh? Hello?" She heard Carry''s coarse voice through the phone.


    "Mom? Are you home?"


    "Who is this?"


    "It''s me, Lucy."


    "Lucy, what are you doing calling me at this hour?"


    "Mom, are you asleep?"


    "I was taking a nap after a few drinks."


    "Mom, I''m outside. Come open the door."


    "What? Outside... What are you doing outside?"


    Norman signaled to hand over the phone. "Carry, it''s me. Open the door."


    ¡°Nathan, I told you I don''t want to see you anymore. Either get the money or-¡±


    ¡°It''s Norman, you idiot.¡±


    "Norman? What are you doing? Why am I getting so many calls this late at night? Did you just call me an idiot?"


    "Carry, your daughter has run away and you are sleeping? Come open this door right now!"


    "What!? Oh, that''s right, Lucy ran away. Oh gosh. What am I going to do?"


    Lucy took her phone back. "Mom, I''m right here. Open the door."


    "Lucy, is that you?"


    "Yes, open the door."


    The lights of the living room seep through the doorway before the door opens. "Lucy, where have you been? You just disappeared out of nowhere. I was worried sick!"


    "Were you?" Norman responded. "If you were so worried, why were you in bed sleeping?"


    "Norman, what are you doing here? You come to my apartment uninvited and then start yelling at me."


    "You disgust me, Carry. When are you going to grow up?"


    "Oh, shut up. Who are you calling disgusting? How dare you talk to me like that."


    "You guys!" Lucy said loudly. "Can we go inside and talk about this?"


    "I''m not talking to him," responded Carry. Norman pushed her aside as he makes his way in. "Who told you you could enter my apartment? How dare you! I can call the police, you know."


    "If anyone is going to call the police, it''s me. You''re so neglectful that you don''t even care what happens to our daughter."


    "And yet here you are bringing her back. I knew she was with you all this time, so I wasn''t worried at all."


    "She was on a train heading to a unknown city while you were getting drunk."


    "Don''t assume what I was doing! Who says I wasn''t worried! I called the police so they were going to handle it."


    "But I didn''t see you out there looking for her."


    Lucy stepped in front of them, "Stop it! Stop it you two!" She then turned to her father, "I didn''t bring you here to yell at mom."


    "That''s right!¡± Carry said, ¡°All he does is yell at me."


    "Mom, you''re no better. I did run away. I was on a train heading to a different city. I was about to disappear forever."


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    "You what? Lucy, what drove you to do such a thing?"


    "You did. Both of you, but I already made up with dad and he said he was going to change his ways. Now it''s your turn."


    "For what exactly?"


    "What do you think?" Norman interjected. "I was appalled to see that you were no different than when we got married. You still want to party all day at your age. When will you finally grow up?"


    "Why are you putting the blame on me?" Carry said. "You were supposed to be my husband. You were supposed to take care of me."


    "Do you even know why we got married? You were supposed to help me with the business."


    "I don''t know anything about business. I thought a wife was just supposed to support her husband emotionally."


    "And you couldn''t even do that. You just wanted to spend all day shopping."


    "You guys!" Lucy interrupted. "Please stop. This has gone long enough. I get it, you don''t like each other, but screaming and yelling isn''t going to solve anything."


    Both groaned as they faced away from each other. "This was a bad idea," Norman said. "We have nothing to talk about."


    "You bet we don''t," Carry said.


    Lucy turned to her mother, "Dad told me everything. Now it''s your turn. You have to tell me about yourself."


    "That doesn''t sound right. This is adult stuff."


    "But I''m your daughter, and you''ve been ignoring me for too long."


    "I haven''t been ignoring you. When did I ever ignore you?"


    "All the time. You''re never here at home. You always leave me alone."


    "Well, I have a job, I have to go to work."


    "But after work, you come back just to change clothes. You then go who knows where, coming back home drunk afterward."


    "I sometimes have stress from work. I''m not used to having a job, so I go and unwind. But I find time to hang out with you."


    "Then tell me, when was the last time we spent time together?"


    "Uh... I''m sure we went to buy some clothes a few weeks ago."


    "Weeks ago?"


    "Well, I''m busy. The divorce is messy and my parents aren''t sending me any more money. I just want to forget my troubles, okay? You don''t understand what I''m going through."


    "You can''t be this selfish."


    "And what if I am? What if I am a selfish spoiled daddy''s girl? Huh?"


    "Mom, how can you admit to that?"


    The atmosphere became intimidating as Norman and Lucy stared at her, one with scorn and the other with concern. "Why are you blaming me? I don''t know anything, okay? I was just trying to do what daddy said. I was just trying to obey his orders. It''s his fault. It''s Norman''s fault as well. He was supposed to take care of everything. He''s a man, isn''t he? It''s the man who takes care of the woman, okay? Why am I being blamed for everything? What... what am I being blamed for?" The situation started getting to her as Carry sat on the couch. With tears in her eyes, she continues, "I don''t know what it''s like to be a wife, or mother, or whatever. I didn''t do good at school. All I knew is that if I did what daddy told me, he would take care of me forever. Why am I being yelled at now? Why is daddy now abandoning me? It''s not fair! It''s not fair! He won''t even answer my phone calls, just tells me to get back with that disgusting man! I don''t want to be married, I didn''t want to be a mom! I''m still young, I just want to have fun! I just want to go to cruises and casinos and have fun with young men." Carry laid on the couch, sobbing on the pillow.


    Norman groaned, "This is pathetic. You are a grown woman yet Lucy acts more mature than you do." He shook his head and sighed. "This is who your mother really is. I''m sorry you have to see this, but this is the reality. Come on, it''s over now."


    He grabbed Lucy''s arm but she released herself from him, went up to her mother, sat next to her and placed her hand on her shoulders. "Mom, I''m sorry that your Dad isn''t talking to you. I''m sorry that you''re not living a life of luxury and that you have no money. But if it makes you feel better, I''ll be here for you. No matter how bad things get, I won''t leave you. Maybe I can''t provide you with luxuries or give you any money, but I will always love you, Mom. I will do anything to make you happy."


    Carry looked at Lucy who was near in tears, but despite this show of emotion, Carry got up and headed towards her room.


    Hearing the door slam, wiping her tears, Lucy sat straight on the couch. "I''ll stay here tonight."


    After looking at the direction Carry went, Norman turned around exited the apartment.


    --


    She was already out of bed, ready to make breakfast when Carry''s door was discovered opened. Even more so, the note taped on the door. Barely able to grasp it anymore, it fluttered into the floor after reading it. The words now stuck in her mind.


    Lucy, I thought about this and I can''t do this. I don''t know anything, I''m too dumb to figure anything out on my own. This whole thing has just messed me up. I can''t talk to daddy about this as he refuses to talk to me. I guess Norman can talk to him for me, but I''m too scared of him. Besides, I don''t like being a mother. I don''t get to go out on dates, or drink in the evening, or have any fun. It''s too much work for me and nobody taught me how to work. All I can do is be a stripper and dance for money, get free drinks, and have a good time with men. But I''m getting older now and nobody wants me anymore. I''m so alone now, nobody told me how to be an adult. I''m just a big child myself.


    You''re so smart that you don''t need me. You can do anything because you''re smart. I''m too stupid to do anything myself. That''s why it''s best if I leave and never come back. I''m sorry but I''m a terrible mother, and I''ll own up to that. You can do whatever you want because you''re way smarter than me. I don''t know what to do about anything anymore. I''m just a spoiled brat without a future. All want to do is have fun and not have responsibilities. That is why I decided to find a rich man to marry and take care of me forever. I don''t care what he wants me to do. If he wants me to do dirty and nasty things, I''ll do it, as long as I can live the life of luxury I''ve only known. That is all that I am, and nothing more. You are better than me, Lucy, so you can go ahead and forget about me. You have a future, but I don''t.


    All Lucy could do was sob as she leaned against the wall staring at the window.

 Dream 5

    Dream of the Eternal Lovers


    An impasse was the young man''s first thought as there were no other roads around him, but it was a matter of fact that he was in the middle of two roads. One towards a made out of ice, and the other to a forest, as dark as it was mysterious. There were no signs to tell him what each was and his only familiarity was the city. When he looked upon the city, all the residents were at each other''s throats.


    ¡°This is my ice!¡± said one to another in argument.


    ¡°No, it is my ice!¡±


    ¡°You have enough ice. Let me have some.¡±


    ¡°You have too much. Why don''t you share?¡±


    And throughout this city, all denizens were fighting for all the ice that was abundant. The buildings, the streets, the cars, the lamps, the food, all was ice and each person was fighting to keep all of it for themselves.


    He looked the other way and saw the forest peaceful and quiet, but eyes peered through the shadows. A cold wind was blowing through that gave him quite the chill. The sun was shining but the trees were so dense that few rays of light could peer through.


    There was nobody in this forest, except for one person: the young-girl waiting for him on the outskirts.


    He looked back at the city, its commodities, its comforts, its resonance to familiarity. Yet, the screams and shouts of the selfish people who kept hoarding ice made him feel uneased for he did not want any more ice, he had no love for it. He could not understand why many were fighting for ice even if it meant fighting their friends, neighbors, and even their family.


    He returned his sight to the forest, so full of mystery, full of dread. But the girl beckoned him.


    It was at this time that an old wise man appeared on the road. ¡°You are at the crossroad of your life,¡± spoke the elderly man. ¡°It is time to choose a path.¡±


    ¡°I know of her,¡± said the Young-man. ¡°I have known her for so long. We have never been together for more than a mere moment before being taken away. Now she wants me to enter a dark forest.?¡±


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    ¡°It is up to you to decide where to go. She can come along, or you can go with her. You decide the road you must take and you can even decide who you take with.¡±


    ¡°If I go back to the city, they will expect me to lust for ice. I do not care about ice.¡±


    ¡°Then what is it that you desire?¡±


    The Young-man looked back at the girl waiting by the forest and said, ¡°I want her to come with me and live in the city of ice, for she too does not want the ice, I know of this.¡±


    ¡°Then why not take her? Do you fear that the people will insult you for not wanting ice?¡°


    ¡°I must confess that I do fear them for that reason.¡±


    ¡°Why do you fear them for that?¡±


    ¡°Because I want them to like me.¡±


    ¡°But do you like them?¡±


    The Young-man thought for a moment before answering, ¡°I don''t know anymore.¡±


    ¡°Then when was the last time you cared about them?¡±


    ¡°When I wanted ice for myself. But I wasn''t selfish, or at least I didn''t believe so. When I saw my friend decide to share their ice, they were seen as a hero. I followed their example and shared my ice, but I was seen with scorn and they acted most maliciously. I wanted to share the ice and lost all my friends. A strange phenomenon happened after that. Even though the ice was around me, I could not take any more. Not even one icicle would stay in my hand for it would melt before my eyes. I kept telling people I could not grab the ice and they mocked me for it, telling me ice was no longer in my favor. That is why I left the city and now I stand before a dark forest. I must admit that even though I despise ice, I do miss the times when I loved it. But now I have come to loathe ice and want no part in it.¡±


    ¡°Young-man, there is nothing you can do to change them. To tell them not to hoard ice when it''s all around them, they will think you are mad. There is nothing you can do except live for yourself.¡±


    ¡°What do you mean?¡±


    ¡°If ice does not matter to you, then do not take the ice. If they insult you for not wanting ice, then walk past them. The people are so caught up in gathering ice, they have no time to deal with you, and even if they do, when they realize that all the time spent on mocking you gave them no ice, they will leave you be. You need not pay attention to them, for you will not be worth the effort in the end.¡±


    When the old wise man said his final words, the Young-man devified for a moment before walking over to the dark forest where the Young-girl was waiting.


    ¡°Let us leave this forest. This forest is lonely and cold. I tire of dealing with its mysteries, never finding an answer. Come, to the city, but not for ice, but because we do not want ice. Perhaps one day the people will see us, happy, smiling, full of joy. They will mock us but perhaps, someday, when they see our merry life, then maybe they''ll see themselves in the mirror, see their own miserable faces, and realize that too much of a good thing spoils the spirit. Won''t you come with me and face the ridicule that will come to pass?¡±


    He reached out his hand and she with a smile on her face placed her hand on his. ¡°I will go wherever you go, no matter what the consequences, for as long as you are with me, anything is possible.¡±


    Hand in hand, both started walking back to the city of ice, leaving the dark forest behind them forever.

 Chapter 70

    ¡°This is becoming our spot," Lucy said.


    "It''s all a coincidence, really," Johan responded. "It''s right in front of the train after all. It''s quite a convenient spot for anyone."


    ¡°But we''re not taking the train. This is just a random spot we chose.¡±


    ¡°I guess you''re right,¡± Johan chuckled.


    "How about we meet somewhere else, next time?"


    "Sure. I''m all up for a change of pace."


    She smiled as she got off her seat and with a bit of excitement, both headed toward the small park.


    The sun was out, shining brightly, the puddles on the pavement now becoming damp spots. It was a beautiful day for a stroll but the situation did call for exploration as a more important matter was at hand.


    "So, you''re living with your dad now?" Johan asked.


    "I moved in with him, only to find out he has to move out. He quit the company and his parents are suing him over it. He wants to get a good lawyer which will cost him a lot of money. We''re looking to move to a smaller place."


    "But have things improved between you two?"


    "Yeah. He''s trying. He''s really trying. I sometimes feel like I''m the parent with the way he acts. I mean, he used to hire someone to cook his meals and clean his house. He has no idea how to take care of himself. He was acting so silly when I was teaching him." She chuckled a bit. "I guess he really did dedicate his life to his job. He''s so... robotic in a way. It''s like he can''t do anything unless it involves work. I''m sure he''ll get a good job but it''s going to take some time to teach him how to be... uh... normal?"


    "I still can''t believe parents like this exist."


    "If there''s anything I learned about this is that we all have our own problems. My dad will talk about everything. All I know is that I''m loved now, and it''s all thanks to you."


    "Me? I haven''t done anything."


    "You have no idea how much you''ve helped me."


    "I didn''t do anything. I made everything worse. I gave you terrible advice and... almost lost you."


    Lucy got in front of Johan and with a smile, "Tell me, why were you in the beach on that stormy night?"


    "Because Margaret wanted to go."


    "But you didn''t want to go, did you?"


    "No. I didn''t."


    "Why not?"


    "Because it reminded me of the past. It reminded me of the good times that were gone. It reminded me of the last time I had friends. It reminded me... of you."


    "And you went anyway, didn''t you? Because you knew the train station was there, and you knew I was riding the train. So you planned it all out, when the train came by and came to a stop, at the exact spot I was in, you started screaming for me. Johan, don''t be so modest. Just say you planned it all out."


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    "But I didn''t. In fact, I couldn''t. I ignored your plea. I was completely remorseful when-"


    Lucy grabbed Johan''s collar and pulled him down gently, placing her finger on his lips, "It''s okay to be modest every now and again. You think too much, Johan. Just confess. You had it all planned out. You knew what train I was in and what stop I was going to be in. You even knew how fast to run so that the door would close before you got close." She let go to allow Johan to straighten up. Lucy put her hands on her hips and raises her eyebrows as she waited for her answer.


    With uncertainty in his voice Johan answered, "Yeah. I planned it all out."


    Lucy shoved him gently. "Stop lying. You''re not that smart."


    "But you said that...."


    Lucy started laughing so much that she had to lean against him. "You''re so silly, Johan. You''re no different than my dad. Maybe he''s right. Maybe I am more mature than everyone around me."


    "Yeah, maybe you''re right. We''re all a bunch of softies in the end."


    Both had a good laugh at each other and after calming down, they continued their walk.


    "I kind of left you hanging when my dad came,¡± Lucy said. ¡°I''m sorry about that."


    "It''s fine. You needed to talk to your dad, after all. I had things to consider myself. Though I must confess I haven''t actually done anything. I still need to reconcile with Wendy and Margaret to some extent. I talked to her a bit and apologized for making her take an Uber. We were on a date after all, which still feels weird to say."


    "A date, huh? "


    "I said I was sorry."


    "I''m just teasing you. I get it. Margaret and Wendy sound nice. I would like to meet your friends."


    "Friends? I haven''t been a good friend in years."


    "Would you like me to be with you when you talk to them? Kind of give you support."


    "No. I need to do this myself. I got to make amends with Wendy and Margaret. I swore to them I was moving on with my life, but looks like I can''t do that without facing my insecurities. Besides, they''ll find it weird I made friends with a middle-schooler. That''s just how it is, I guess.¡±


    "That''s kind of rude. I take back my comment. I don''t think you should be friends with them.¡± Lucy chuckled.


    "Yeah, I get it, but it''s not like they''re rude or mean. It''s just that-"


    "Johan, I''m kidding. Really, you need to lighten up."


    "I know. I got a lot to make it up to them. I want to go back to being the guy I was in high school. I want to have a lot of friends. I don''t want to be lonely anymore."


    "That''s great. I''ll try to make friends myself too. I won''t be going anywhere anymore, so I won''t be afraid to lose anyone else."


    "Then I guess times are going to be tough for the both of us, but I''m sure we''ll make it."


    "But what about us?"


    "Us?"


    "Yeah. You and me. What about us?"


    Johan paused and scratched his face a bit, "Yeah. Us."


    "Do you still believe in the dreams?"


    "Now that I''m more rational in thought, I really don''t know what to make of the dream. I mean, I''ve investigated the dream before and nothing turned up. I really don''t... I''m doing it again, just ranting on."


    "Tell me, what do you think about the dreams? Do you still think you''re reincarnated?"


    "I really don''t know. Perhaps I am his reincarnation, or perhaps it''s all a coincidence. Do you believe you are the reincarnation of the girl in the dream?"


    "Hmm. Maybe. I mean, we have the same dream. And I feel the same emotions she goes through. And perhaps... the same emotions you are going through."


    "Really? Well, whether or not the dream means anything, all I''m going to say is that I am Johan, college student, living in the 21st century... who is in love with middle-school student Lucy."


    Lucy covered her mouth as she turned around all giddy. "Well, actually, do you remember... you know... at the train station in that strange city... under the rain... and... when we met up... after you said you loved me...? Remember what happened next?"


    Johan thought for a moment before answering, "Yeah, I remember vividly. You had a gyro, didn''t you?"


    "Huh?"


    "Alfio."


    "Alfio?"


    "You had a gyro from Alfio, the little greek restaurant not too far from the train station. You bought a gyro before you got on the train, right? That was pretty good. I feel like a gyro right now, don''t you think."


    Lucy thought about it for a bit before she shoved Johan, "That''s what you remember from that?"


    "What else is there to remember other than the delicious gyros from Alfio''s? In fact, it''s not too far from here. Let''s go get one."


    Lucy playfully slapped Johan who was laughing. "Okay, but you''re paying. After all, that was just a free sample." She proceeded to make kissing gestures in a mocking manner which made Johan laugh even harder.


    She got close to him, wrapped her arms around him by the side, and he pulled her closer into his as they continue their walk in the park.

 Chapter 71

    Juggling the two bags full of groceries, Wendy tilted to the left to reach their pocket only for the bag they were holding beginning to slip. The oranges on top were about to topple onto the ground before a much-needed helping hand reached out and averted disaster.


    ¡°I saw you from the window,¡± Johan said.


    ¡°Well thanks,¡± they responded.


    As they entered the apartment, Johan said, ¡°Don''t put them away just yet. I need to talk to you.¡±


    ¡°Can''t it wait? I mean, I just bought the tea.¡±


    ¡°It won''t take long. Just give me a few moments of your time.¡±


    Wendy agreed and after leaving the groceries on the kitchen counter, both headed toward the living room.


    Johan exhaled briefly before beginning. "I''ll get right to the point. There''s this girl I like. In fact, I''m in love with her, but I''m having a dilemma. I''ve been thinking about it all night long, trying to figure out how to handle this. I have to decide whether or not to be her boyfriend or just stay friends."


    "Wait, you have a girlfriend now?"


    ¡°That''s the thing, should I or shouldn''t I?¡±


    ¡°I don''t see why not.¡±


    He looks over at Wendy, who was listening attentively with a gleam of excitement. "No matter how much I want to tell you, I''m always held back. Maybe it''s because I''ve lost faith in society, or maybe due to indoctrination. I''m not sure, but just trust me when I tell you that I can''t tell you who this girl is, at least not yet."


    "If you don''t want to tell me, that''s fine. As far as I know, you should just accept her love. I mean, she does love you, right?"


    "She does, and she wants to be with me, but even she knows she shouldn''t just jump right into it. We''re really thinking about this."


    "Johan, you''re full of mystery, you know? I sometimes wonder who you really are."


    "All I can tell you is that I want to be with her, but everybody else keeps telling me I can''t... even you."


    "Me? But I just said-"


    "Trust me, you would say no, and that would be the end of our friendship."


    "Really? You really think this girl would break up our friendship?"


    "The truth would break this friendship."


    "Johan, I don''t like how you''re saying that."


    "But you made it clear."


    "When?"


    "Again. I can''t tell you. I just can''t tell you."


    "That sounds kind of offending. I mean, why would you think that I would break up our friendship?"


    "In that case, let me ask you, what if I left you when you decided to come out? What if I said that I didn''t want to be your friend because of who you are?"


    "Well, that would be terrible. Johan, are you telling me that-"


    "No, Wendy. That''s not it."


    "I''m sorry Johan but now I''m just more confused than ever. You''re not making much sense."


    "I know and I''m sorry I can''t be clear, but do tell me, what went through your mind about what I said? What if you overheard me saying that I did not approve of who you are and would not want to be your friend anymore."


    "Well, I would be sad, and angry, but I would understand."


    "You would? I thought you would be furious about this."


    "I would. I really would. Nobody wants to be told they don''t want to be your friend because of who you are, and I''m no exception, but I also don''t want my friends to be dishonest with me. If you don''t like me for who I am, then you should just come out and say it. Johan, do you not like me?"


    John looked into Wendy''s eyes, and then beyond them, trying to find the person he so wanted to see again. "I must confess that I miss the old you. He was cool, collected, kind of thought, but all the same a scatterbrain, but always easy-going and friendly. Now, as Wendy, though you''re still the same scatterbrain, you have changed since high school. What hasn''t changed are your friends. Your old friends are still around, that includes me. In contrast, you''re the only old friend from high school I still have left, and even then that could change in the future. I''m actually quite jealous of you because you have a group of people who support you, but I have none. I lost everyone. So my anguish with you isn''t because I don''t like the change, it''s just that I don''t like that you can change, but I can''t."


    You might be reading a stolen copy. Visit Royal Road for the authentic version.


    "Johan, I never knew that''s how you really felt."


    "I guess this is what people call change. Though for me, it''s a change for the worse."


    "Then why not get it out of your system."


    "Get what out?"


    "Your aggression. Take it out on me."


    "But that''s what I''m doing."


    "Are you? Because that''s the weakest display of indignation I''ve ever seen."


    "But I''m being very rude."


    Wendy couldn''t help but laugh at Johan''s very milquetoast attitude that he felt was coarse enough to feel guilty about speaking his mind. "Are you kidding me? Do you know how many names I''ve been called? Do you know how many times people have used slurs against me? Far worse things have been thrown my way. Sure, I still have my old friends, but I''ve made so many haters as well. At least in high school. College is a bit better, but not by much. I guess I got over that phase, but you know what, I don''t care what they have to say. I don''t care what they think of me. This is the decision I made, and I have to accept it, warts and all. So come on, tell me what you want to tell me. Don''t hold back. Say everything you have held up until this point."


    "But Wendy, I just did. I really did. I thought what I said was super insensitive and extremely unsupported."


    "Is that really all you have? Virtue signaling? That''s hardly a scratch for me."


    "Well, I guess I''m glad that you can take a hit. I don''t have that same kind of protection." Johan got up from the couch and headed back to the kitchen. "I said everything I wanted to say. If that''s how you really feel, then I guess that''s it. There''s no point in getting any advice from you then."


    Wendy followed shortly. "Hey, I don''t know where you got the idea that you couldn''t be with this girl, especially since I didn''t even know you were the type to actually fall in love. In fact, I don''t recall you ever finding interest in girls when we were in high school. So this is a bit of a surprise to hear from you."


    "That''s why I figured your advice wouldn''t actually help me. Just forget I said anything."


    "In that case, I''ll just give you a universal piece of advice. Something that transcends anything you believe is my opinion or anyone else''s. It''s simple: Just do what makes you happy."


    "That''s your advice?"


    "Take it from me. Sometimes people will tell you terrible things, they''ll call you horrible names behind your back, even if they didn''t know they did. The world will be against you, forcing you to conform to a belief you don''t want to be a part of. But I say just forget about them, tell them all to go to Heck. Just do what you think is right. I mean, it worked for me. I''m just saying that if I can''t support you in your time of need, if I can''t accept you for who you are, then I''m not a very good friend. After all, I don''t want my friends to be dishonest with me. If someone doesn''t approve of me, I''d rather they be honest and take their leave, than stay and pretend that everything is fine. If I''m not being supportive, if I''m saying things behind your back, then you should tell me about it. I can''t be a good friend if I mock you without even knowing it."


    "You really think that?"


    "Sure. If you really think I will disapprove of who you are, then I should know."


    "I just said our friendship was on a thin thread."


    "But do you really want to be my friend under these pretenses?"


    "No, I don''t. I really want us to be honest with each other."


    "Then why not? You were honest with me just now and I''ve been honest with you for years. In fact, I will admit, you''re not the kind of person who would do something bad. You''re the most wholesome person I know. You''re so honest and respectful. I have a feeling this girl you like has changed you and I want to say that it''s all her fault, but I know you, Johan. If you say you love her, I believe you. If you say you can''t be with her but you want to, I''ll believe you. And if you say that this girl will break up our friendship, well, I''ll believe you too."


    "So you really are prepared for that?"


    "Yes."


    "Aren''t you going to be sad or anything like that?"


    "Of course, I will."


    "But what if you end up hating me."


    "Hating you?"


    "What if the secret I hold will make you hate me forever."


    "Johan, you''re being kind of... weird right now. What did you do exactly? Did you murder someone?"


    Johan sighed. "The thing is Wendy, it''s who I am that may lead you to hate me. Maybe what I''ve done just recently, if I told you, you would probably think I was a despicable person."


    Wendy''s face showed confusion. "Are you for real? It''s that bad?"


    "That''s what I''ve come to accept after everything I''ve been through. You could be the best person in the world, but even your best friends will abandon you by simply telling them the truth."


    "I want to say that won''t be me... but now I''m kind of afraid of asking what it is."


    "Well, that''s the truth. Things are changing before our very eyes, but we have yet to accept the truth. As you said, Wendy, if I didn''t approve of you, the friendship would be over. The only reason why this friendship prevails is that I have nothing really against you as a person. But there was a possibility that was not the case. But I learned recently during all this that sometimes the truth hurts and a lie may be better if it keeps a friendship going."


    "That''s terrible advice."


    "From one to another, I guess. I''m sorry but that''s the only thing I''ve come up with because I''m in love with a girl. I love her so much. Nothing is getting in my way to be with her. I''m sorry to say but, if I have to choose, I choose her. I choose Lucy."


    Leaving them with a soured look on their face, Johan passed by them and went into his room.


    Laying on his bed, contemplating, he thought to himself, ''In the end, I couldn''t say anything. I''m sorry Edwin but maybe Wendy is not working out. I respect them for who they are but I don''t think I like them as much as I liked you. If, or when, I tell them about Lucy, then will be the deciding factor. Either way, I guess this is goodbye, old friend.''

 Chapter 72

    The pain was nothing more than a slight sting but to Jenny, it felt like her arms were begging for mercy as she dropped the scrubber. ¡°Oh, I''ve had enough! I don''t want to do this anymore.¡±


    At this time, Lucy appeared before her with a lawn mower. ¡°Okay, the lawn is done.¡±


    ¡°Wow, you did that fast.¡±


    ¡°I guess I had fun mowing the lawn.¡±


    ¡°You did? I can''t stand that stupid machine. But whatever, let''s go have some fun.¡±


    ¡°But you still got to scrub the fence.¡±


    ¡°This is stupid. I don''t know why Mom wants me to scrub the fence when nobody else does it. She''s just being mean.¡°


    ¡°That''s right,¡± Mitsy said who appeared before them. ¡°I''m being mean just like how you were mean to that Jonah boy.¡±


    ¡°I told you, we broke up.¡±


    ¡°No, you broke up with him because you were being selfish. If that boy didn''t want to let his friends know about your relationship, you should have respected that. You just wanted the attention. You took the advice of TikTok influencers too far after I told you not to listen to them. That''s bad advice.¡±


    ¡°But Mom, it doesn''t matter. Jonah was a jerk anyway.¡±


    ¡°Don''t bad mouth him. We both know it''s your fault, and I''m sure Lucy understands it as well."


    "I do?" Lucy asked.


    Jenny continued, ¡°I don''t get it. You said I can fool around with boys.¡±


    ¡°Fooling around is one thing, having a boyfriend is another. If you want to fool around, you can''t have a boyfriend. If you want a boyfriend, you can''t fool around.¡°


    ¡°You''re just confusing me now.¡±


    ¡°You will someday. So if you want to go back to fooling around, then get all your chores done, otherwise you''re not going anywhere.¡± Mitsy turned to Lucy. ¡°That''s enough charity from you, Lucy. Now leave Jenny to her chores and come inside.¡±


    Lucy turned to Jenny. ¡°Sorry Jenny but at least I mowed the lawn.¡±


    Jenny just scowled before returning to scrubbing the fence which Lucy took as a sign to go back inside.


    ¡°Thanks for helping my daughter,¡± said Mitsy, ¡°But this is a punishment. You should have only done half of the lawn.¡±


    ¡°I actually enjoyed it. I never mowed a lawn before but I had fun.¡±


    ¡°Then you should come more often then. That machine is too much for me.¡±


    ¡°Alright, no problem. But I don''t understand why Jenny is being punished. I thought you gave her the freedom to date boys.¡±


    ¡°Yes. She can do whatever she wants with whatever boy she wants. She can fool around as much as she wants. Fool around that is.¡±


    ¡°I don''t understand.¡±


    ¡°If she wants to fool around with all the boys at school, I don''t care as long as they wear protection. She''s a teenager after all, so it''s going to happen. But having a boyfriend, that''s a different matter. Turns out my Jenny was seeing other boys.¡±


    ¡°She cheated on Jonah?¡±


    ¡°Pretty much. If you want to fool around with other boys, that''s okay, but once you decide to be in a relationship, then that boy is the only boy you stay with. Even I know that cheating is a terrible thing.¡±


    ¡°I''m sorry, I didn''t know that.¡±


    ¡°No need to apologize on her behalf. This is all a learning process. I''ll be having many talks with her about this for sure. As much as I''m fine with her having fun with boys, she has to decide if she''s going to get married or not. In fact, I rather she get married rather than live this lifestyle that I went through, but I can''t force her to do anything she doesn''t want. I''m going to have a lot to tell her now that she''s growing up and finding interest in boys. I can''t have her destroy her life as I did mine, I got to make sure she doesn''t do the same mistakes I did.¡±


    ¡°I see. Well, I wish you luck with that. I guess she''s not available to hang out with me today then. I''ll be taking my leave.¡°


    ¡°You don''t have to leave yet. Why don''t you stay? Let''s have a chat.¡±


    ¡°Chat? What could we possibly talk about?¡±


    ¡°Well, since the topic was brought up, how about your boyfriend?¡±


    Lucy paused momentarily. She opened her mouth to reply but relented just as quickly. She sighed and followed Mitsy toward the kitchen.


    "So, dating a college boy, huh?"


    "We''re not dating. At least not after that disaster."


    "Disastrous date? Oh dear, what did you do?"


    "I wish to forget that day."


    "That bad, huh? Well, it was your first date. Maybe you should''ve tried this with one your age instead before moving on to an older boy."


    "Are you really okay with me being in love with an older man?"


    "Oh, in love. It gets even better. And he likes you back, right?"


    "Yes, but is this okay? Because no matter how much I ask online, they keep telling me it''s wrong. That he''s taking advantage of me and that he''s a creep. They don''t even know him."


    "Asking strangers online was your first mistake. They''re so judgmental. That''s why I keep telling Jenny to stay away from Twitter and Tiktok. It''s a terrible place. The things she picked up from that site. I got some deprogramming to do with that girl."


    "But why are you okay with this? I understand that was your life, but why are you so okay with being so open about being... promiscuous. I''m sorry, there''s no other way I can say that."


    "It''s just who I am. I''m just a party girl who likes to have some fun, you know? I''ve seen it all and there''s still much more to see. Nothing really shocks me anymore. Besides, my daughter deserves someone better. I don''t mind being her mother but I know she would''ve been better off with someone else. Instead, she''s stuck with me. I''m just doing the best I can with my own philosophies. As for you and Johan, he sounds like a good guy. I presume he''s a gentleman. He is keeping his hands to himself, right? He''s not touching you or anything?"


    "No, I can assure you he''s not."


    "Then he''s fine by my books. As long as he waits till you''re good and ready, I find no problem."


    "No offense but I''m having a bad feeling about this talk."


    If you come across this story on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it.


    "Alright, settle down, Lucy. In that case, just tell what''s going on inside you. You''re a good girl. A bit nerdy but we could use more people like you. So stop asking strangers online and let me know what is going on."


    Lucy took a moment to take a deep breath before continuing, ¡°I need to decide what to do next. Should we be boyfriend and girlfriend, or remain friends? That''s what I''m trying to figure out.¡±


    "I had a feeling that was the case, so let''s consider both possibilities then. What if you said, ''yes, I will be your wonderful girlfriend'' and he takes you in his arms and whisks you away to a wonderful castle where you live happily ever after."


    "I don''t think that''s going to happen."


    "But doesn''t it sound nice? I mean, I''m sure you''ve fantasized about something like that."


    "I have, I''m embarrassed to admit."


    "So what''s keeping you from saying yes?"


    "Because I''m just... scared, I guess."


    "What''s scaring you?"


    "I guess it''s the idea of actually being with an adult. It''s not like I can just be his girlfriend, I don''t even know what that means. And everybody else will look at us weirdly. I mean, I''ve noticed people would stare at us whenever we hung out. I don''t want that to happen all the time."


    "You''re afraid of what others will think about you, huh? In that case, what about if you say no? What if you just want to stay friends? Nobody will look at you funny if you''re just hanging out. Of course, there''s no kissing allowed either. I bet that would be the worse of it."


    "Oh... you know?"


    With a surprised look on her face, Mitsy replied, ¡°No, I didn''t, that was just me teasing you.¡± Lucy was beyond embarrassed as she covered her red flushed face as Mitsy smiled. "Honey, don''t be too embarrassed. I''ve been kissing men since I was 16."


    "Yeah... thanks for the mental image."


    "Moving on then, what is the scenario of you two just being friends?"


    "Nothing much would change. We''d just do the same thing we''ve been doing."


    "And is that so bad?"


    "No. Nothing''s wrong with that."


    "So why not make that decision?"


    "Because we still have feelings for each other. I don''t know how he''s feeling but I''m sure it''s the same thing I''m going through. I really want to be his girlfriend, and I''m sure he wants to be my boyfriend too."


    "Yup, sounds about right."


    "You know what I''m talking about?"


    "Nope. I just said it ''sounds'' right. I wouldn''t know, I just go out with any cute guy. Is he cute?"


    "That''s... well... that''s subjective."


    "Oh, that cute, huh?"


    "Will you please stop it? This is going over the line."


    "Alright then. In that case, I''m going to tell you what I think. I think you should just decide whatever is best for you."


    "That''s it?"


    "That''s it. Whatever you decide is the final decision."


    "That''s exactly the problem I am having. I don''t know what to decide."


    ¡°You''re misunderstanding me, Lucy. Whatever decision you make doesn''t really matter in the end."


    "What do you mean?"


    "Honey, listen to me. Sometimes we spend so much time thinking about this or that when just making a choice is the best option. It doesn''t matter what you choose, as long as you feel it''s the right decision. The choices don''t matter, it''s what you, and only you, believe is the right choice."


    "Only me? But Johan is also thinking about this."


    "His decision doesn''t matter. Whatever he decides is overwritten by yours."


    "But that doesn''t sound fair."


    "Because it isn''t. It''s to your advantage. Now don''t get me wrong, this Johan guy sounds like an upstanding guy, but at the same time, he is much older than you. Even if he is cute, we can''t forget he''s got more experience than you do. Speaking of which, do you have plans for the future?"


    "Kind of. I want to graduate middle and high school, and go to college."


    "What do you want to be when you grow up?"


    "I want to be a therapist. I want to help people who are going through hard times, as I did."


    "Then do just that. Go to college, learn therapy stuff, and get a career in that. Simple."


    "Simple? Just like that?"


    "Sure. Nothing to it."


    "But I got to study hard for that. I mean, I still got to graduate middle school, let alone high school."


    "Then do that. Study, graduate, and then go to college. Work hard, get good grades, then graduate. Do all that."


    "Mitsy, I don''t understand how any of this has to do with Johan."


    "Johan is in college too, right? He''s doing the same thing, getting his degree in whatever, right?"


    "Yeah."


    "Okay. Then he graduates, gets his career going, becomes a superstar in whatever."


    "Yeah, but where are you going with this?"


    "Whatever path you are going in, whatever future you can visualize, tell me, is Johan right there at the end?"


    "Uh... I never thought about that, but I''d like to think that he is."


    "Now tell me, how is this decision you are making right now going to keep you from reaching your goals? Your dreams? How is the decision you''re making going to keep him, or you, from being together in the end?"


    "I... don''t know. I never considered the future."


    "And that''s your second mistake." Lucy was perplexed trying to decipher where Mitsy was going with all this as she continued, "You know, my parents were never in my life. Dad left us and mom went to jail when I was very young. Got sent to an orphanage and was raised there. But I wasn''t the best at school either and had trouble learning stuff so I didn''t graduate high school. I ran away when I was 16 and did what I had to in order to survive. I had pretty looks back then so I survived by being with random strange men, even got to stay in some places for a few weeks. Eventually, I worked my way to being a stripper and earned some good money, did some pornography, and got some fame during my youth. Oh, maybe you are uncomfortable with this part of the story."


    "It''s fine. I''m kind of familiar with this topic."


    ¡°In any case, I''ll digress. I eventually got pregnant and had my Jenny. I figured I should quit that industry and live a ''normal'' life. That didn''t work out. I was still judged for my past. I had a job at a grocery store that hardly paid the bills, and I eventually got fired. I was desperate to make the rent but got too old to go back to the adult lifestyle. That''s when I started a YouTube channel, talking about the adult industry. It got me an audience and I started making money. Then OnlyFans came and I did the same thing, just telling my stories. I made enough money to eventually retire.


    "In the end, in trying to leave my old life, I had to come back to it. But the irony is that living a normal lifestyle secluded me from society due to my past, but it was that past that welcomed me back with open arms. That lifestyle that everyone shames me for is what saved my life and my daughter''s, but it didn''t have to be this way if only I had guidance in my early life. What I''m trying to tell you is that your life is dictated by what you do now. You have to think about your future right now when you still have a chance.¡±


    After being in awe at the story, Lucy replied, "That''s quite a story you told me."


    "And I hope I made my point. Lucy, you are far more fortunate than I am. You have an opportunity to shine when I couldn''t. This whole business with Johan is pointless when there''s so much more to consider. It doesn''t matter what you decide between the two of you. What matters is how it''s going to affect your future, and only yours. Let Johan do whatever he''s going to do, you have your life to live. Whatever you decide, it has to be to your benefit because you still have much to learn about life. Whether you settle down with him or wait, it can''t interfere with your future."


    "So are you saying I shouldn''t be his girlfriend yet?"


    "You can be his girlfriend if you want. Or you can remain friends. It doesn''t matter as long as your goals, your ambitions, are not impeded."


    "But what about Johan''s decision?"


    "Johan is an adult, or on his way to adulthood as I see it. He''s already figured out what he''s going to do, or at least he should at this point. He''s been on his path longer than you have. You are no consequence to him whatever you decide. Your path is still being built. It''s good that you have a road map, but you still got a long way to go. Do not decide based on the feelings of Johan, or your own feelings even. Consider the path you are taking, and how your decision will impact your life. Whatever you decided, it should have no bearings on your way to success."


    "I''m sorry but I don''t think this is helping me. I still can''t comprehend what you are telling me."


    "Then let me put it bluntly. If Johan could dictate your future, what would you want him to tell you?" Lucy sat straight up as if she was pulled upright. The question left an impression on her that she was speechless. "Don''t think too hard, Lucy. Just rest on it, let the words simmer, and then later it''ll make sense. But don''t take my word for it. I''m just telling you my own philosophy. For all I know, maybe it won''t actually help you but it''s something to consider, I guess."


    After the initial impact had faltered, leaving her more profound than when she came in, Lucy smiled. "Thank you, Mitsy."


    "Any time. Well then, you can go home now, and hopefully, I gave you something to consider."


    "Actually, about that story, you told me. I''m sorry but I got to confess something. My mother, well, she was just like you. She too was a party girl, always going out late at night. But she left me. I only have my dad, and he was also quite neglectful. Only now he''s trying to make it up to me but I may never see my mother ever again."


    Lucy turned to the side attempting to hide her tears. As she tried to control her sobbing, Mitsy wrapped her arms around from behind and patted Lucy''s head. "I''m sorry dear. I''m glad your father is still in your life but looks like not every woman in our shoes can be like me."


    Lucy sighed. "Thank you. I guess I just needed that. You resonated with me with your story. Jenny is lucky to have a mom like you."


    Mitsy lets her go. "Thank you, dear. But don''t worry, I''ll be a good mom to you."


    "Wait, what? My mom?"


    "Yeah. From now on, I''ll be your mom. You can be my honorary daughter."


    "I... I don''t think that''s..."


    "A bit embarrassed about me?"


    "No. I don''t judge people."


    "Then come over here and be my kid."


    "I still have my dad."


    "Is that so? Your dad like older women?" Lucy was shocked at what Mitsy asked but after seeing her laugh, she eventually started laughing along. Mitsy patted her on the shoulder. "Lucy, nothing''s going to stop you. Just keep your chin up and look towards the good in life. Put the past behind you and look forward to the future. You have a pure heart and we need more people like that. As long as you remain who you are, nothing is going to stop you."

 Chapter 73

    "Come on, Dad," Margaret said as she talked on her phone. "It''s not that bad. I''m doing fine, aren''t I? Just enough to get by... Yeah but... All that matters is that I pass, right? I''m not going to spend every waking minute studying. I want to have some fun every now and again... Dad, that''s none of your business. Besides, I''m doing okay in my classes... I''m not some super genius, okay? Why can''t you just accept that my current grade is acceptable?... Don''t be unreasonable, okay? Look, I got to go, alright?... Yes, I do study but when I do it is up to me, okay? Alright, I got to go, bye." After hanging up, she let out an exasperated groan. "He just won''t quit bugging me."


    Continuing to walk across campus, Johan entered her view causing her to stop. ''Maybe I should wait till he''s gone, but I''ve been meaning to talk to him. It''s been a few days, after all.'' Standing by the sidelines, she twiddles her fingers before walking towards him.


    "Hey, Johan."


    As if surprised Johan responded, "Hi, Margaret. How are you doing?"


    "I''m doing well, but more importantly, how are you doing?"


    "I''m okay. Had a lot to think about since that day. Sorry about leaving you like that and the way I acted. I was going through some emotional issues."


    "I bet you were, but you seem to be yourself today. What happened during that time?"


    "Well, if you must know, after you left I met someone at the train station nearby."


    "Someone I know."


    "Not particularly, but... it was a surprise to me. It was perfectly timed in fact, like we were destined to meet up."


    "Really? Then what happened?"


    "Their train just so happen to stop at the same time I was in the train station, but the doors closed before I could reach her. I had to drive all the way to another city that I wasn''t familiar with. It was kind of amazing now that I think about it."


    "So what happened when you arrived in this new city?"


    "I went to the train station and thought I lost her forever, but like a miracle, she actually got off in that same terminal. I couldn''t believe my luck, or so I thought because turns out that she got off expecting me to rescue her. She was heading to a far away place, one where I would never be able to reach her. I couldn''t have been any happier at that moment."


    "So let me get this straight. At the exact moment when you left our date, this girl you happen to know just so happen to be on a train that stopped at the exact time you were there. When the train continued its destination, you drove for miles to its next stop, to a place you''ve never been to, one she knew she had to get off because she trusted you were coming for her?"


    "Sounds about right."


    "Sounds too good to be true."


    "But that''s exactly what happened."


    "You sure you''re not telling me an excerpt from your latest novel?"


    "It''s the truth, but that''s not a bad idea though. I''m already writing notes."


    "You''re something else, Johan. But I''m glad you''re feeling better."


    "I am. I very much am."


    "But that doesn''t explain the change, though. What did you do when you met this girl?"


    "Oh... that. Well, let''s just say that''s between me and her."


    "Oh, really..."


    "Now put that smirk away. Don''t go running wild with ideas."


    "Johan, I told you, I know what makes a man smile. You met a girl who you drove all the way to an unknown place just to meet her. What do you expect me to believe? You both shook hands like good friends?"


    "That is possible."


    "Not even you would do that. After all, you left me alone in the rain to get a taxi."


    "I said I was sorry."


    "Yeah, and apology accepted because I''m happy that you found true love."


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    "Yes. True love. Still feels weird to me."


    "Look, I don''t know what really happened. I just find this story to be a bit exaggerated, but I do know that you made up with Lucy. Yeah, I don''t know who she is, but when a man loves a woman, he''ll do anything to get her back. I should know. Some guy took a flight and followed me all the way to Rome when I was vacationing there last year. Love drives you to do things you wouldn''t normally consider."


    "I heard that guy was a stalker."


    "Oh... yeah... he kind of was, but it''s the thought that counts."


    Johan chuckled at this. "I guess you know more about this than I do. In that case, let me be candid. I didn''t want to talk to you about this as I was thinking that you were still mad at me, but since we''re in good spirits, I figured it''s a good time right now. As you have guessed, that was Lucy who was on that train. Now that I think about it, it is such a strange story that I don''t blame you for thinking it''s fiction, but it really happened. I was at the lowest I''d ever been and she appeared before me in my time of need. I still can''t believe that I drove my car to another city, hoping that I could reach her in time. Trains are faster than cars, however. I felt I didn''t have a chance, but she had so much trust in me that she stepped off that train at some random stop because she believed in me. I was so happy that I hugged her tightly." He took a deep breath. "She then kissed me... and I kissed her back. At the time, I wasn''t thinking straight, my emotions took over, and now that I think about it, I don''t know if I did the right thing in returning that kiss."


    "Because you''re not allowed right?"


    "Yeah."


    "Are you ever planning on telling me why you can''t be with her?"


    "I tried telling Wendy but I just couldn''t, so what chance do I have telling you? I''ve accepted that I can''t tell anyone about this. I''m skating on thin ice by simply telling you this."


    "I can''t understand a situation where you can''t tell me that you can''t be with a girl. That is if... you know... the secret lies within you, not her."


    "What does that mean?"


    "Oh, you know. How you reject women so easily, yet you seem to be chummy with men."


    Johan groaned, "Will you ever stop thinking that way about me?"


    "I''m sorry but I only have our date as a reference. Men can hardly keep their hands off of me. You, I was struggling to hold your hand."


    "I was being a gentleman."


    "A bit too ''gentle'' for my taste." Margaret chuckled.


    "But I''m serious, Margaret. I''m in a bit of a pinch because I have to make a decision now. I had confessed my love for her on that station and now I got to follow it up with a decision. Do I follow through with my feelings and reciprocate them, or must I rescind them and remain friends? I don''t know what to tell her."


    "Can you at least tell me the consequences of each?"


    "If I accept her feelings, I''m responsible for not just mine but hers. I can hardly control my feelings, let alone that of a girl. I''m thinking if I tell her I want to be her boyfriend, I wouldn''t know how to handle it and may end up hurting her later on. There''s also the stigma about dating her. If people find out, it''s over for both of us. We''ll be back to being burned at the stake."


    "Whoa, really? That''s a bit much."


    "As for just being friends, that should technically be the right thing to do, but you know what? I''ve had enough of that. Doing the right thing only caused me anguish. We both have strong feelings for each other. This makes it so difficult to just be friends. I truly, really, am in love with her and I''m at a point where I''ve had enough of people''s judgmental ways. If anything, it just draws me closer to her. Maybe someday I''ll even enjoy seeing them livid." Johan puts his hand on his mouth before slowly lowering it. ¡°I guess those were my real feelings coming out.¡±


    "My, oh my. Johan, you''re really growing up now. About time."


    "Are you just going to make fun of me?"


    "Okay, fine. Then let me tell you what I think. First, as I kept telling you, you should forget about what everyone else thinks. I don''t know who this Lucy is, and frankly, I may not want to know, but I know that if you really do love her, then it''s nobody''s business. After all, if we kept on worrying about what other people think, we wouldn''t have the guts to fight off oppression, and progressiveness wouldn''t exist. Equal rights came from disrupting the system, right? Fight for your love, Johan."


    Johan straightened out his tie, "I don''t think this applies to that, Margaret."


    "Okay, I''m exaggerating, but my point is, people bringing you down isn''t helping you or anyone else. It''s just their egos doing all the thinking without reasoning. And as for making a decision on whether you should be with her or not... well... if you really are struggling to make a decision, and this is a complicated matter that will change everything, I guess all I can say is to listen to your heart."


    "You mean, turn off my brain and listen to my heart?"


    "Like you did earlier.¡±


    ¡°Really? I never thought that was the reason.¡±


    ¡°I think this is a matter of just doing what you think is right. Just forget about the world for a moment. Just forget about school, forget about me, Wendy, even Lucy, and especially your brain. Just listen to yourself for once. I bet you haven''t even considered your own personal feelings in this. You seem like the kind of guy who thinks of others before yourself, but this is a situation that is impacting you more so than any other person, yet you put aside your own feelings on a whim. I mean, you said earlier that she kissed you, and then you kissed her. Why the guilt? That''s normal. It''s normal for two people in love to kiss."


    "I''m certain most people would agree with me more than you in this matter."


    Margaret rolled her eyes. "There you go again, blaming yourself, putting yourself in a time-out, turning on that brain of yours. Just clear your mind and ask yourself, what is it that you really want?"


    "What I want?"


    "You ever thought about what you really want, or have you just been thinking about what everyone else wants? It''s okay to be selfish at times. Think about yourself and what you want out of life. Then the answer will come."


    They eventually reached the parking lot where they approached their cars. Upon entering her car and starting its engine, "Be a man, Johan. At least for once in your life, be a man. I told you this, didn''t I? Keep going and stop worrying so much. Turn off that brain on occasion and just do what you need to do." She closed the door and pulled out of the parking spot.


    As she exited the campus, with a big smile on her face, "You can''t fool me, Johan. I know who you really are."

 Chapter 74

    "I told you, you didn''t have to cook anything," Norman said.


    "But you hardly know how to cook," responded Lucy, "and you can''t keep eating takeout. That''s not healthy. You didn''t buy any, did you?"


    "Looking after my health now, are we?"


    "Come on, Dad."


    "I came straight home, I swear. I''m actually starving."


    When the meal was set and both took their seats, Norman took a bite out of his chicken casserole. "This is really good."


    "Thanks, Dad. I did a bit of shopping around here. I''m surprised at how good the food is in this area."


    "It should be for the price."


    "So this is the life you''ve been living, right?"


    "It has been but it''s all coming to an end. We''re going to have to move out of here by the end of the month. It''s too expensive for me to afford and the legal fees are going to take a lot of my money to settle. Looks like I''m going to live the impoverished life for a while."


    "I don''t care where we move to, as long as we can stay here in the city."


    "Why is that?"


    "I''m finally starting to make friends here. It took a while, but I''m starting to open up to them."


    "That''s great news, but dear, it may be possible that I have to move to a new state. This city is very expensive."


    "I know. I''m just really hoping. Mom used to move from place to place so I couldn''t make any friends without losing them. I don''t want to lose the friends I made here."


    He sighed. "Then I''ll figure something out. If you don''t want to move, then I''ll just figure a way to remain in this city."


    She smiled. "Thanks, Dad."


    They continued to savor the meal she created, enjoying their conversation as the casserole whittled down to a few morsels.


    "That was very good,¡± Norman said after he finished his meal. ¡°I''ve never had something better."


    "Stop it, Dad. It wasn''t that great."


    "But it was. You are a good cook. You should be a chef."


    "No, I''m not that good. I just follow the video''s instructions."


    She took both of their plates but Norman stopped her. "Let me take care of the dishes."


    "Do you even know how to use the dishwasher?"


    "No, but I know how to wash a dish."


    "You should learn to use the dishwasher."


    He took both their plates to the kitchen, "What''s so bad about cleaning a few dishes? Even I can do that." His remark would immediately be regretted upon finding the sink full of dirty pots, pans, and utensils.


    He looked over at Lucy who was smiling, "A bit of trial and error was required to get that casserole."


    He simply laughed it off, "Go do your homework already."


    After twenty minutes of washing dishes and cleaning the sink, he wiped his hands on the kitchen towel and took a seat on the couch. He grabbed the remote but hesitated to press the power button. Putting the remote away, he got up and walked towards the window, overlooking the night sky, and gave out a sigh.


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    At this point, Lucy came out of her room. "I''m done with my homework."


    "Well good."


    "Dad, I''ve been meaning to talk to you for a while."


    "Well, I''m free right now."


    Norman sat on a reclining chair as Lucy took her seat on the couch. "Like I said, I''ve started making friends again. But there''s one friend who I consider... more than a friend. He''s a boy and... I have strong feelings for him."


    "I see. So you''re at that age, huh?"


    "That doesn''t make me an adult, you know."


    "I know, Lucy."


    "But I don''t know what to do about this. I mean, on the one hand, I know I shouldn''t be with him right now. I got so many things to do, and I want to get to know you more now that I have the chance to do so. I don''t know anything about you, Dad. I figure we can make up for lost time. But at the same time, I really like him. He''s very special to me. I really want to be his girlfriend."


    "I know exactly what you are going through. I felt the same way when I was your age. There were a lot of girls that I liked, thought that I was head over heels for them. But unfortunately, I don''t know what would have happened because I avoided them. My parents would never approve, telling me that the only thing I should be doing is studying. I just did what I was told and never bothered with having a girlfriend."


    "So you never fell in love?"


    "I''m afraid I haven''t. But even at my age, I would love to think that I can still find someone. I still feel strongly that there''s someone out there for me."


    "But this is more than just my feelings. He also likes me. He confessed his love for me earlier. We even kissed. But afterward, I felt kind of bad."


    "And what gave you this guilt?"


    "Because we went out once and it was a disaster. He was very uncomfortable and I felt that people were staring at us. I feel like I did something bad but I really just wanted to make him happy. I felt like I was doing something terrible."


    "So you''re trying to figure out if you should continue seeing this boy?"


    "It''s not like I''m planning on never seeing him again or anything, it''s just that... we really like each other very much. When we were lonely and thought nobody loved us, we were there for each other. The more lonely we got, the more time we spent, and the more time we spent, the more in love we became. I won''t forget those precious moments we spent, but they were full of pain and sorrow. I don''t want to go through that again."


    "Sounds like this is too much for you to handle. Why not put this decision aside? After all, waiting is also an option."


    "Well, even if we did wait... he''s different than other boys. Like, there''s a... rather wide difference, let''s just say."


    "A ''wide" difference, huh?"


    "Yeah and waiting won''t change that. So even if we waited till I graduated high school or even college, I will still be in the same situation."


    "Then tell me, why do you want to decide right now? Surely you can wait, right? Or is he pressuring you to answer?"


    "We just told ourselves that we''d think about it, but I assume we''ll have to decide on Saturday."


    "Okay. I think I understand now. Would you like to know what I think?"


    "Yes, please."


    "I think that you''re too preoccupied. Consider your responsibilities. You have school, you have homework, you got new friends to attend to." He got up from his chair and sat next to Lucy to give her a hug and a kiss. "You have your father, and your father loves you very much." Lucy couldn''t help but smile. "And there''s going to be more and more responsibilities put upon you in the coming future. There''s so much to do because you''re still so young. In a few years, you''ll graduate middle school, then you''ll enter high school. Then there will be college and after that, you got to find a career, and maybe start your own business. Either way, you got a lot to do before you become an adult. So why bother worrying about this? After all, he likes you, right?"


    "Yeah, he does."


    "Then he can wait, can''t he? If he''s not pressuring you, he''ll understand you have too much going on in your life. If he is being pushy and demands you give him an answer, he''s not worth it. He''ll just use you and take advantage of you."


    "He''s not like that, Dad."


    "Do you really know that? Do you really know who he is?"


    "Dad, he''s not a bad person. He would never do anything terrible to me."


    "Alright. I''ll take your word for it. But my point stands, you are thinking too much about this when you should just be living your life. Your young, you''re healthy, and you got a lot to look forward to. So go have fun and be with your friends. You already have enough to worry about. A boy isn''t worth it right now or ever. So tell him, ''I''m not ready to make a decision so you''re just going to have to wait.''"


    "That''s kind of mean to say."


    "Then say it more courteously. Any way you say it if you two are meant to be together forever, then waiting a few years isn''t going to hurt your relationship, is it?"


    "I never thought of it that way."


    "That''s what I would do if I was in your shoes." He got up from the couch. "Take it from me who''s been living his life under another person''s whims: youth, just as life, is too short. Enjoy what little of it you have and minimize your restrictions. If you feel that anything will hold you down, then don''t try to rationalize it. It''s not worth it in the end."


    Lucy followed and gave him a hug. "Thanks, Dad."


    After he patted her head, she headed towards her room.


    "Lucy.¡± He said as she was opening the door. ¡°Your newfound friends. One of them wouldn''t happen to be that young man you were with at that train station, wouldn''t it?"


    "Yeah. Johan."


    "He seems like a nice guy. I''d like to meet him one day."


    Lucy smiled. "I''d also like you to meet him." She turned around and resumed going to her room.


    Norman sat back on the couch and pondered, ''I have no idea what I''m doing.''

 Final Chapter

    Johan was as prompt as always, but the early bird known as Lucy was already ten minutes late. He sent her a text message to which she replied that she was on her way. He took a seat in Lucy''s usual spot, watching all the people going from one place to another, and remembering the first time they met on this very same platform. ''It seems like a lifetime has passed. To think it would lead up to this.''


    Lucy finally arrived and Johan got up to his feet. Lucy was quite shy at this moment as she waved at him with her fingers. He could tell that she was a bit nervous as the feeling was mutual. ¡°Excuse me, Miss. I''m looking for someone and she''s running late. You wouldn''t happen to have seen her, would you?¡±


    ¡°Oh. And who is this girl you are talking about?¡±


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    ¡°Well, the only way I can describe her is that she''s a very pretty girl, the prettiest in the world. You can''t miss her.¡±


    Lucy couldn''t contain her giddiness. ¡°She must be so lucky to have a friend like you. I''m looking for a boy, but he''s nerdy and would rather sit in his apartment to write his books. If only he was as outgoing and as handsome as you.¡±


    ¡°Hey, now,¡± Johan was miffed but Lucy only laughed as she approached Johan and gave him a hug, an action that immediately made him forgive her.


    She backed away a few steps to get a good look at him. With a sweet smile on her face, "So, have you decided?"


    Johan returned the smile with one on his own. "I have. Have you decided?"


    Lucy grabbed onto his hand and clasped it with the other. Johan took his hand and placed it on top of hers. "I have."


    The End

 Epilogue

    Another boring day in the middle of nowhere as Patricia sat by the counter waiting for customers or the occasional car to pass by her store. But not only did a car appear in front of her, it was a rather modern-looking one. It was by no means a fancy one but considering that old beat-up trucks were the norm around these parts, this was unprecedented. And even more so when she saw a man in a suit exit the vehicle and entered her store.


    ¡°Howdy,¡± she welcomed. ¡°How can I help ya?¡±


    ¡°Hello. I''m on my way to Springfield but I''m kind of lost.¡±


    ¡°Springfield ain''t too far from here. Just keep goin'' straight ahead an you''ll see a highway. Ya can''t miss it.¡±


    ¡°Ah. I had a feeling. I wasn''t certain since my GPS died on me.¡±


    ¡°Yup. That''s usually what happens. Yer tech ain''t gonna work here in the middle uh nowhere but you''ll get your signal back once yawl hit the highway.¡±


    ¡°Alright, sounds good. Those pumps outside work? I need to refuel.¡±


    ¡°Ya bet it does. Don''t think us here in the sticks don''t keep our pumps just for show.¡±


    ¡°Alright. Let me get like 3 gallons.¡±


    ¡°Sure thing. So, yawl from the city?¡±


    ¡°We are. We''re going on vacation right now.¡±


    ¡°Sounds rather nice. Yawl lookin'' rather nice in that getup too.¡±


    ¡°Well, I do like wearing suits, after all.¡±


    ¡°Heard the city''s gone kind of crazy in the last few years. Lotsa city folk been actin'' crazy lately.¡±


    ¡°No doubt about that. Society has gone insane. That''s why I want to get away from it. I''m hoping someday me and my girl can move somewhere quiet. Maybe that''s why I''m looking forward to Springfield. Looks quiet and peaceful. I could use that.¡±


    ¡°Izzat so? Yawl got yourself a liddel purdy girlfriend?¡±


    He chuckled a bit. ¡°Yeah, I sure do.¡±


    ¡°I''m sure am glad there is still folk out there marryin'' traditionally. I''ve seen too many city folk come here yellin'' and screamin'' at our conservative ways, always comin'' all in here with their so-called ''progressive views'' but just come out screaming and hollering nonsense. I ''ave anything against them folks but when they come here, a man coming in here with their husband, woman coming in here with their wives, as I said I gots no problems with it, but that''s frowned upon ''round these parts. You can''t just come in here demanding we fit your ways.¡±


    Support the creativity of authors by visiting the original site for this novel and more.¡°Yeah, I know what you mean. But you know what, I feel the world is too complicated for explanations. I figure just live and let live. I don''t care what anybody else does, as long as I can live in peace with my girl, I don''t care about anything anymore.¡±


    At this time, the doorbell chimed as someone else entered the store. ¡°Oh, Johan, look, there are some farm animals over there.¡±


    ¡°Really? Oh, yeah, I see goats.¡±


    ¡°They even let me pet them. Oh Johan, maybe we should live on a farm someday.¡±


    ¡°Are you crazy? I can''t do any farm work and neither can you.¡±


    ¡°Then maybe we can move here and we can learn along the way.¡±


    ¡°I don''t think even your Dad is going to agree to that, but who knows, maybe if can convince him. Sure looks nice.¡±


    He turned his attention to Patricia. ¡°Sorry, I got caught up in all the commotion. How much was it?¡±


    ¡°Oh, that''ll be $13.64.¡±


    ¡°Then this should do it. Keep the change.¡± He handed over a ten and five-dollar bill before turning around. ¡°Come on, Lucy. I gotta fill up the car now.¡±


    ¡°Oh, Johan, can''t we stay a bit longer?¡±


    ¡°But there''s nothing to see here and the truck full of goats already left.¡±


    ¡°I don''t know about that. Look over there,¡± and she pointed toward a window.


    Johan turned his attention toward it. ¡°I don''t see anything.¡± He turned around only for Lucy to sneak in a kiss. She backed away, embarrassed, covering her mouth with her hands, all giddy. Johan could not help but do the same while he said, ¡°Lucy, you got to stop doing that.¡±


    ¡°I''m keeping you on your toes.¡±


    ¡°Alright, come on. Let''s fill up and keep going. I know where to go now.¡±


    They take their leave as Patricia watched through the window seeing Johan holding Lucy tightly as they walked back to their car.


    ¡°Dem city slickers are getting more and more crazy for my liking.¡±