《Falling for the Babysitter》 Chapter 1 Chapter 1 1 Remy The trash smells disgusting. ¡°God, did something crawl in there and die?¡± my friend ra says beside me as I wheel the trashcan out to the curb. She¡¯s stayed over for horror movie night, a monthly tradition we¡¯ve held since we were twelve. I hold my breath, face scrunched up tight. ¡°Yeah, whatever that thing was my mom tried to feed usst night.¡± ¡°What was that?¡± ra says. ¡°Tofu.¡± ¡°Is that some kind of bird, because if it is, it should be hunted until it¡¯s extinct.¡± Iugh. Poor ra. Her family is strictly meat and potatoes. She never even saw a Brussel sprout until we met. She thought it was the cutest little baby cabbage until she actually tried it. Now she calls them devil warts. ¡°It¡¯s made from soy beans, I think.¡± The sun has just risen. There¡¯s a mist curling off the cement as the day warms up. The sky, with its layers of vibrant orange and yellow, looks like candy corn. A beautiful fall day. The sprinklerse on with a hiss that startles me at first before I realize what made that sound. We have to sprint across thewn in bare feet to get to the newspaper before it¡¯s ruined. No matter how many times my momins, the guy who delivers our newspaper always tosses it onto thewn instead of the front porch. I¡¯m shaking off the water droplets when I hear the deep rumble of a pickup truck. I watch as it pulls into Sam¡¯s¡ªmy neighbor¡¯s¡ªdriveway. But my neighbor drives a Toyota Prius, so I know it¡¯s not him, unless he got a new car. With his office geek appearance, he doesn¡¯t really seem like a truck kind of guy, so I doubt it. The engine turns off and it takes a minute for the driver to exit the vehicle. Then Deacon steps out of the driver¡¯s side and my heart explodes in my chest. ¡°Oh my god,¡± I say, standing there, dumbfounded. ra turns toward my neighbor¡¯s house. ¡°Holy shit, is that¡ª¡± ¡°Yes, it is. Don¡¯t stare!¡± I grab her by the shoulders and twist her body to face me. ¡°Pretend we¡¯re talking,¡± I say. ¡°We are talking.¡± ¡°Just stand there so I can stare without being obvious I¡¯m staring,¡± I say as I watch him over her shoulder. She grumbles. ¡°Fine. But hurry up. It¡¯s freezing out here.¡± Deacon is Sam¡¯s brother. He used to own the house, then sold it to Sam after he married. I remember sitting in my old tree house, watching as he loaded his boxes into the U-Haul, half tempted to go next door and put each box back in the house so he couldn¡¯t leave. That was a couple years ago. I haven¡¯t seen him since. Until now. He still looks just as amazing as he did back then. A little more mature, maybe, and thicker with muscle than I remember. Clearly that confident swagger never went away. That¡¯s easy to tell even at this distance as he goes to the back door of the truck. What¡¯s not easy to see is what¡¯s in the back seat of the truck. I squint to see better. Is that the top of a car seat I see in the back window? ¡°Is that ¡­¡± I start to say, but get distracted and don¡¯t finish the thought. Belonging ? N?velDram/a.Org. ¡°Is that what?¡± ra says, starting to turn around, but I stop her. ¡°Don¡¯t look,¡± I say. ¡°He¡¯ll see us watching him.¡± ¡°Then tell me what¡¯s going on!¡± I keep watching, holding my breath. Does he have a baby? My heart is thumping so hard I can feel it in my teeth. I stand on the tips of my toes, looking through the mist of sprinkler spray. When I take a step closer, a stream of water hits me dead on in the face. I yelp, and ra screams as we try to get out of way. Deacon looks over at us, and I pretend I wasn¡¯t looking. When we¡¯re out of the way of the sprinkler stream, I nce at him again. That¡¯s when Deacon pulls a baby from a car seat. ¡°Oh my god, he has a baby now,¡± I say. ra gets this irritated antsy look on her face. ¡°Can I please look now.¡± ¡°Not yet.¡± Deacon was twenty-five years old when I first started noticing him as something more than just my neighbor like all the rest. I was thirteen. I had the biggest crush on him. It was his smile that first attracted me to him. Some neighbor kids and I were on skateboards out in front of my house. One of the boys I hung out with at the time¡ªmy first crush¡ªhad built a quarter pipe for us to skate on, and we¡¯d drag it out into the street during the summer while most people were at work and we didn¡¯t have to worry about traffic. I was too embarrassed to wear a helmet because I though it made me look stupid, and I wanted to look good for my crush, so I¡¯d taken it off. Well, like a dumbass, I fell. Not in some big, epic way while doing a trick either. I was skating on a t surface when my wheel caught a rock and I went face first into the cement. Chapter 2 Chapter 2 Deacon had been next door and had seen the whole thing. He rushed over and helped me off the ground. At first he looked terrified, his face all bunched up with worry until he saw that I was fine. Nothing hurt, really, except my pride. Just a little road rash. I was a tough kid and had experienced far worse falls. When he saw that I was okay, his face broke out into the most electrifying smile I¡¯d ever seen. ¡°You scared the hell out of me,¡± he¡¯d said. All I could do was stare at that magnificent white smile. My other crush was a distant memory. Deacon had consumed my thoughts thereafter. Every day I would sit in my yard and watch him. Mostly from my tree house because I liked the bird¡¯s eye view. He had an amazing body and was always out in the yard working without a shirt on or washing his car. He had an old muscle car back then and was in love with it. He would wash and wax it several times a week. I found all the different ces in my house to watch him from. In the summer, when it was either too boring or too hot to be outside, I would sit in my house with the windows open, waiting to hear the creak of hinges whenever his screen door would open. I would then find any excuse to go outside. I even volunteered to weed my mom¡¯s garden despite all the earthworms crawling around because it was right next to the shrubs where he parked his car. I would wear the skimpiest shorts I could find and a low cut top even though I didn¡¯t have any boobs to speak of at the time. While I was watering the garden, I made sure to get my shirt wet so my bra would show through. I was just a kid so Deacon never noticed me despite my desperate attempts. To try and get his attention, I even went as far as going trick-or-treating at his house dressed as a sexy nurse hoping he would finally notice me. I was all knobby knees and straight lines. My makeup was on dark and thick. I thought I was so mature, but thinking back, I probably looked like the Bride of Chucky. While at the door of Sam¡¯s house, him standing in the doorway with his bowl of candy, some jerk kid came up beside me and pointed out that nurses wore scrubs and my costume was all wrong. Deacon hadughed without looking at me and dropped a Snickers bar in my jack-ontern bucket. That was five years ago and I still have the wrapper from that candy bar. I¡¯d kept it as a souvenir. It¡¯s kind of pathetic when I think about it. Soon after that he met someone. I don¡¯t remember her name but I¡¯ll never forget how jealous I was when I first saw her. It was on a weekend. I¡¯d passed up an invitation from my friends to go see a movie so that I could wait up to see Deacon. He was outte, which wasn¡¯t normal for him. It was almost one in the morning when his car finally pulled into the driveway. He opened the passenger side door and my stomach clenched, and I felt sick. The woman who got out was gorgeous and curvy. Two things I definitely was not back then. They went inside his house and I cried myself to sleep that night. It wasn¡¯t long after that that they wed and moved away. The rest is history. I feel the sting of that night like it¡¯s yesterday, all those old emotions rushing back to me. I watch as he takes his child out of the car seat. I want to say hello, but he probably doesn¡¯t remember me. It would just make things awkward and I would have to exin who I was when the look of confusion crossed his face. I¡¯ve changed quite a bit since thest time we crossed paths. I¡¯m a few inches taller. I¡¯ve grown out my blond hair, which once was a bob. Now it reaches to the middle of my back. The sses I once wore have been exchanged for contact lenses. My hips and breasts have filled out, my A cups are now Cs. Gone is the t chest I once loathed. I was worried there for a while. Afraid my body would never develop. Luckily, when I turned seventeen, it was like someone dunked me in Miracle Grow. Now, at eighteen, I finally look like the woman I¡¯ve always wanted to be. The kind of woman that makes men stop in their tracks just to watch me walk by. Maybe Deacon will notice me now. I quickly put that thought out of my mind. He¡¯s a married man, a father, and I¡¯m not a home wrecker. With a sigh, I watch him and his child disappear into his brother¡¯s house. ¡°You can look now,¡± I tell ra. All excited, she turns to find an empty yard next door with no Deacon and no baby. ¡°You¡¯re such a jerk,¡± she says. N?velDrama.Org owns this. I smile and take the paper inside for my mom. I drop the wet newspaper down on the kitchen table where my mom is having her morning coffee. She¡¯s been making breakfast, and the room smells of cinnamon. ¡°Sorry. I tried to save it before it got soaked,¡± I say. She frowns and picks it up with two fingers. Gray droplets fall from the paper and pool on her cemat. Chapter 3 Chapter 3 ¡°Maybe you should subscribe to the news website instead,¡± I suggest. ra sits at the table and pours herself a cup of coffee. ¡°I think I will.¡± My mom tosses it in the trash. ¡°There are pancakes on the counter if you two want any.¡± ra gives me a questioning look. If they¡¯re anything likest night¡¯s dinner monstrosity, she¡¯s out. But luckily it¡¯s just whole wheat pancakes. Healthy but edible. I put two on each of our tes and smother them with butter and syrup. Then I grab a ss of orange juice and a cup of coffee and sit next to ra, across the table from my mom. But instead of eating, my mind starts to wander, and I find myself staring out the window. All those feelings I¡¯d harbored for Deacon as a young teene rushing back. They¡¯re all consuming just as they had been back then. It¡¯s like they¡¯ve been lying dormant, awaiting his arrival. ? N?velDrama.Org - All rights reserved. Back when Deacon still owned the house next door, I used to get home long before my mom. I¡¯d lie in bed and picture him knocking on the front door. When I would answer it, he was there with no shirt on and a bouquet of long stem red roses cradled in baby¡¯s breath. He¡¯d tell me how beautiful I was and how he couldn¡¯t live without me one more second. Our twelve-year age difference never mattered to him in my fantasies. I was all he could ever want or need. In my daydreams he was a hopeless romantic. I even used to tell people at school I was dating an older man. Because in my heart he was mine. And though I knew it wasn¡¯t true and being together would probably never happen, I felt that if I said it out loud, tossed it up in the universe, that somehow¡ªlike wishing on a star¡ªit woulde true. I never said his name or told them he was my neighbor for fear my lies would get back to him, or get him trouble. But I sure as hell hinted at it. Not that anyone actually believed me. Most people thought I was lying. Or, on the off chance I was telling the truth, that the older ¡®man¡¯ I always talked about was some freshman in high school. Sometimes, at night, I would look out my bedroom window and watch him dress. I didn¡¯t think much of it back then, but now I realize I was a total stalker. His window wasn¡¯trge enough to show his whole body when he would change. Just from the waist up. But I had a wonderfully vivid imagination. ¡°Remy?¡± I startle at the sudden sound of my name. ¡°What?¡± ¡°Did you hear me?¡± my mom says. ¡°You were spacing out.¡± ra smirks, and bumps my shoulder. She knows exactly what¡¯s distracting me. She was the only one I ever confessed to about all of my Deacon fantasies. ¡°Oh, sorry. I was daydreaming. What were you saying?¡± She blows at the steam rising from her coffee cup and says, ¡°I was asking if you remember Deacon who used to live next door.¡± I try to wipe away any signs of recognition or swooning at the sound of his name off my face. ¡°Who¡¯s Deacon?¡± ra says with that same mischievous tilt of her lips. I re at her. ¡°Vaguely,¡± I say to my mom. ¡°Didn¡¯t you used to have a crush on him?¡± my mom says with a teasing lilt in her voice. I hold my finger up to keep ra from making any morements. How does my mom know about my crush? Was I that obvious? Or maybe it¡¯s because everyone in the neighborhood had a crush on him at the time and she¡¯s just assuming I was one of them. ¡°Probably. I was thirteen. I had a crush on everyone,¡± I say, hoping I sound as nonchnt as I do in my head. ¡°I talked to him yesterday when he first arrived in town.¡± He¡¯s been here an entire day and I¡¯m only now seeing him? ¡°What did you guys talk about?¡± I ask, trying to pry more information out of her. My mom puts her elbows on the table, looking out the window toward the house his brother now owns. ¡°Poor thing got divorced a while ago. His wife left him and the baby in order to go party.¡± My eyes open wide. Luckily she doesn¡¯t notice. That¡¯s so horrible. I can¡¯t imagine anyone wanting to leave Deacon to go party, or for any reason, actually. And who leaves their baby? Deacon and his child are better off without her as far as I¡¯m concerned. While I do feel bad that Deacon had to go through all of that, I can¡¯t say I¡¯m too upset about him being single now. Maybe I actually stand a chance with him ¡­ I shut that thought down again. Best not to get my hopes up. ¡°He has a job here in town,¡± my mom continues. ¡°He¡¯ll need a babysitter he can trust. I volunteered you for the job. I hope that¡¯s okay.¡± ra nces at me, a yful twinkle in her eyes. It¡¯s not hard to tell what¡¯s on my mind, I¡¯m sure. Chapter 4 Chapter 4 My heart leaps into my throat. Me babysitting for Deacon? The man responsible for all my sexy teenage dreams, the only man I imagined giving my virginity to. I don¡¯t think there¡¯s a number high enough to count the amount of times I pictured myself in his house, on his bed, spread open for him. What it would feel like to kiss him, to have him inside of me. What do his sheets smell like? What does his skin feel like? Could I really stop myself from acting on the feelings I¡¯ve had for him since puberty? I¡¯m bombarded by so many questions that my mind starts spinning. I push my te away, my appetite gone. ¡°That¡¯s fine,¡± I say. ¡°I could use the extra money.¡± ra leans over and whispers in my ear so my mom can¡¯t hear her. ¡°And a goody.¡± That night I hardly sleep. I wanted ra to stay another night to keep mepany, but she has to go to work in the morning. My stomach is in knots. I¡¯m up at four in the morning, wide awake and excited. I shower, do my makeup, make sure everything is perfect, and think about all the things I might say to him. When seven o¡¯clock finally rolls around, I go over to meet Deacon, even though, in my head, I already know him. I stand on his front porch, in front of the door, my entire body shaking. Though it¡¯s fall, it¡¯s still a warm morning. The sun is bright, birds chirping. Not exactly sweater weather, which normally I¡¯d be bummed out about. I love colder weather. The scarves, boots, hats. But at least, when it¡¯s warm, it¡¯s easier to dress sexy. Sexy but not too slutty because I still want Deacon to give me the babysitting job. It¡¯s a fine line between the two. I decide on a loose tank top and a bra a size too small to give me more cleavage, and shorts. The more skin the better, but at the same time, it¡¯s what any other girl my age would be wearing. I knock on the door. Blood rushes in my ears when I hear the thump of footsteps on the other side. When it opens, I¡¯m nearly knocked back by the rush seeing him up close gives me. He¡¯s more handsome than I remember. Age has been kind to him. When I was younger, he¡¯d reminded me of someone, but I could never ce the face with a name. Then one day ra said he looked like Ian Somerhalder, and I was like YES, because that¡¯s exactly who I¡¯d been thinking about. ¡°Remy, wow, you¡¯ve grown up into a beautiful young woman,¡± Deacon says, looking genuinely surprised to see me standing at his front door. ¡°Oh,¡± I say, taken aback. ¡°I didn¡¯t think you knew who I was.¡± ? N?velDrama.Org - All rights reserved. ¡°Of course I know who you are. I was always admiring your garden.¡± I bite my bottom lip. My head conjures a different meaning to that statement, but I think he¡¯s actually talking about the garden I was always messing around in whenever he was outside in his yard. ¡°Thank you. Um, if you want, I could bring some vegetables byter. The garden is full and we can¡¯t seem to get rid of them fast enough. They¡¯re better for the baby rather than store bought, and cheaper than buying organic.¡± I¡¯m rambling. Shut up, I tell myself. His eyebrows are raised. ¡°I would love that. That¡¯s so thoughtful of you to think of my child that way.¡± My face flushes. ¡°I love kids.¡± ¡°Come in,¡± he says and motions for me toe inside. The house doesn¡¯t look how I imagined it. This is definitely his brother Sam¡¯s style. Boring, basically. It¡¯s crazy to think those two are even rted. Deacon clearly got the looks in this family. Sam has a long, horse¡¯s face and jutting chin. He wears the same style button down dress-shirts day in and day out even when he isn¡¯t working, but in different colors to switch things up, and every day it¡¯s khakis. He parts his hair to the side, slicked down with gel. And he drives a Prius for fuck sake. It seems like he actually puts time and effort into being nd. The house mirrors his style. Buttoned down. Muted colors. Basic. There are a few toys scattered here and there, but for the most part the ce is tidy and put together. The clutter must make Sam crazy. He seems like the kind of guy who likes everything in its ce. ¡°Would you like something to drink?¡± Deacon asks. ¡°Sure.¡± We go into the kitchen. I watch his back as he walks. His shirt is tight enough to see the muscles moving through it. He¡¯s stayed fit. Every dad I know tends to let himself slide after a bit. Not that there¡¯s anything wrong with that. Plenty of girls dig a dad body, but I tend to like my men more toned. He bends over to look in the fridge. Nice ass, too. ¡°Looks like we have water and juice. Sorry, I haven¡¯t had much time to get out and go shopping.¡± Chapter 5 Chapter 5 ¡°No worries,¡± I say. ¡°Juice is fine.¡± He grabs the bottle from the fridge and pours some into a ss, handing it to me. Belongs ? to N?velDrama.Org. ¡°I¡¯ll show you around so you can get a feel for the house, then I¡¯ll introduce you to Bailey.¡± The house is two levels. We start on the first level, walking down a long, narrow hall. ¡°If you¡¯re downstairs, this is the guest bathroom,¡± he says, showing me a small half bath with just a sink and toilet. ¡°And just behind it is the mud room and washing machine in case you need to wash anything. Bailey can be messy and I don¡¯t have much in the way of clean clothes for her at the moment. Everything I have is in storage until I can find a ce of my own. I didn¡¯t want to bombard my brother with all of our stuff. I don¡¯t n to stay too long. He¡¯s not big on kids.¡± ¡°I¡¯m so sorry about what happened,¡± I blurt out without thinking. ¡°With your wife, I mean.¡± He turns to look at me, and even though his face still looks friendly, I immediately regret saying it. ¡°I shouldn¡¯t have said that. It was dumb,¡± I say, trying to erase whatever damaged I caused by opening my big damn mouth. ¡°I shouldn¡¯t have brought that up. I don¡¯t know what I was thinking. It¡¯s just my mom told me about your conversation with her yesterday, and ¡­¡± I let my words trail off, not wanting to say anything else just in case I dig the hole deeper and make things worse. ¡°No, it¡¯s okay,¡± he says with a gentle smile. ¡°I¡¯m d it happened when it did. Bailey is young enough so she won¡¯t remember her mother and she¡¯ll be able to move on from this. If it were to have happened when she was older, it might¡¯ve been devastating. I¡¯m actually excited about moving forward. My marriage was horrible from day one. I lived in a house I didn¡¯t love, with a woman I didn¡¯t love, and I was stuck at a job I hated. This change is actually a good thing.¡± I let out a sigh of relief. ¡°Good. I¡¯m d. You don¡¯t have to worry about Bailey while you¡¯re out working. I love kids and I¡¯m really excited about being here.¡± I¡¯m gushing. I can hear the longing in my voice. He has to hear it too. I sound desperate. Maybe he¡¯ll assume it¡¯s just because I need the job and not that I long for him. He can¡¯t possibly know that. ¡°I¡¯m happy to have you here too,¡± he says. ¡°Should we go meet Bailey now?¡± ¡°Yes, please.¡± We head upstairs. As we¡¯re walking, he stops abruptly and turns to me. ¡°Oh, and one other thing¡ª¡± The quick stop makes me bump into him and I catch the ss in my hand before it falls, but not before it sshes red juice all over his work clothes and on the floor. ¡°Oh my god. I¡¯m so sorry,¡± I say, practically in tears. I¡¯m touching the front of him, trying to wipe the juice away but only making it worse by spreading it around. How many times will I have to apologize to him before he leaves the house? He looks down at the front of his shirt, arms out. He doesn¡¯t look mad like I thought he would. Instead, heughs. ¡°That is not your fault. Not at all. I¡¯ll just toss this in the wash before it stains.¡± He takes his shirt off right there in front of me. My jaw falls open and I can¡¯t help but stare. I think he notices, because he¡¯s looking at me differently too. Shy, almost. Maybe he¡¯s not used to being shirtless and alone with girls. ¡°There¡¯s still some on your chest,¡± I say, fighting the urge to reach out and touch his smooth skin. His body is as perfect as I imagined it would be. Thick, corded muscle, but not all sinuous like a body builder. More like a man who stays busy and maybe goes to the gym a day or two a week. There¡¯s a small patch of hair on his chest, and that stomach ¡­ I have a thing about men¡¯s stomachs. His is a lovely washboard. I want to lick him from the trail of hair below his belly button up to his sexy full lips. Wait, who am I kidding? I want to lick everything. I want to taste everything about this man. ¡°It¡¯s fine,¡± he says. ¡°I¡¯m always covered in some kind of mess. It¡¯s just part of the territory when you¡¯re a parent.¡± I¡¯d like to cover him in my own kind of mess. I can already feel myself getting wet with him standing here half naked in front of me. I start to speak, but I¡¯m interrupted by Sam as hees up the stairs behind me. ¡°What¡¯s going on here?¡± he says. I hadn¡¯t heard him until he spoke. He¡¯s a sneaky guy. Makes sense because he looks kind of sneaky. He just has that weasel appearance that I don¡¯t like. Maybe it¡¯s because he¡¯s the one who bought Deacon¡¯s house and ruined my most cherished childhood fantasies. I secretly med him for Deacon leaving, even though I know it wasn¡¯t his fault. Chapter 6 Chapter 6 ¡°Oh, hey, Sam,¡± Deacon says, unperturbed by his brother¡¯s sudden intrusion like I am. ¡°Do you know Remy?¡± ¡°I do know Remy from next door. What I want to know is why she¡¯s here and why you¡¯re practically naked in front of her.¡± Deacon¡¯s face loses its good natured appearance and turns into a hard, sculpted mask of distaste. ¡°She¡¯s here because I need a babysitter for Bailey and I¡¯ve been around this girl since she was a kid and I know her mom. I¡¯m not going to trust my child with some stranger I¡¯ve never met. A ss of juice was spilled and now I¡¯m about to put my shirt in the washer. So that¡¯s why I am currently shirtless. Any more usations you¡¯d like to make?¡± he says, voice t and curt. It¡¯s nice of him not to throw me under the bus by telling Sam I was the one who spilled the juice in the first ce. What I would like to do is step on the wet carpet and really set that stain. Sam seems like the kind of guy who would cry over a stain. Sam looks at me, then at Deacon and says, ¡°Can I talk to you for a minute.¡± Deacon breathes long and slow, then turns to me, his expression lightening, but I can still see the shadow of anger haunting his eyes. ¡°Could you give us a minute, Remy?¡± he says. I chew the inside of my cheek to keep from saying something stupid to Sam. ¡°Sure. I¡¯ll go get a towel to clean up this mess,¡± I say. Belongs ? to N?velDrama.Org. ¡°Do you know where the towels are?¡± Deacon asks me, his voice softer, nicer when he speaks to me. I nod. ¡°I saw some in theundry room.¡± I also saw some of Sam¡¯s clothes in theundry room as well as a muddy pair of boots. Let¡¯s see if I can get creative. This doesn¡¯t look good. Both of them are fuming. I don¡¯t know what I did wrong or why Sam doesn¡¯t like me. I suspect he¡¯s just being a dick because I don¡¯t remember ever having an actual conversation with him, and it¡¯s not like I¡¯ve ever thrown a raging party at my house that would¡¯ve pissed him off. I¡¯m so confused. I rush downstairs while they argue at the top of the staircase. When I¡¯m in theundry room, I realize there¡¯s a vent above my head and I can still hear everything they¡¯re saying as clear as if we were standing in the same room. My plot to ruin his fresh pressed clothes is set aside for now. ¡°What¡¯s going on here?¡± Sam says. There¡¯s no denying the usation in his voice. ¡°Nothing¡¯s going on. It¡¯spletely innocent.¡± ¡°Somehow I doubt that,¡± Sam says. ¡°Did you not see the way that girl was looking at you? She was stripping the rest of you down with her eyes.¡± Deaconughs as if it¡¯s the most ridiculous thing he¡¯s ever heard. ¡°She was not.¡± I open my mouth, shocked. How long had Sam been standing there before he announced himself? I seriously need to figure out how to rearrange my face to not be so transparent about my feelings. I¡¯m surprised Deacon didn¡¯t pick up on it. ¡°You¡¯re blind, brother. That girl wants you,¡± Sam says. ¡°There¡¯s no way a girl that young and beautiful is going to want an old single dad like me. She could have any man she wants.¡± My breath stops. How can he not see how incredibly hot he is? Every woman in the neighborhood wanted him when he lived here. Him being a single dad doesn¡¯t make a bit of difference. Whenever my mom¡¯s book club woulde to the house for their Thursday night meet-ups, it was more like the Deacon fan club. Ten minutes were spent talking about whatever book they were reading at the time and the other fifty minutes were spent talking about his ass. I used to sit at the top of the stairs, rolling my eyes at all the sad housewives. It¡¯s been a few years since then, but he hasn¡¯t changed much in looks. If anything he¡¯s gotten better looking with age. He¡¯s still as incredibly sexy as ever. And he thinks I¡¯m beautiful. I was afraid he¡¯d still think of me as a child¡ªif he even thought about me at all. The brothers continue to argue. Sam begs him not to hire me. He thinks I¡¯m trouble and that I¡¯m just like Deacon¡¯s ex-wife. What an ass. How could I not be incredibly offended by the things he¡¯s saying? He doesn¡¯t know me. I¡¯ve never had a conversation with him. We¡¯ve never even said ¡®hi¡¯ to each other in passing, so where does he get off saying I¡¯m trouble? I would never leave Deacon and my kid to go off and party. I hardly ever party even though I¡¯m eighteen and that¡¯s what most eighteen-year olds do. That¡¯s never been me. I¡¯ve always been the responsible one in my group of friends. The one who always gets A¡¯s, who always gets home before curfew, and I¡¯m always true to my word. Deacon¡¯s ex is a disgrace. How dare hepare me to her. Chapter 7 Chapter 7 I take long, slow breaths to calm myself down. I want to storm out and m the door behind me so that he knows I¡¯ve heard what he said, but I know Deacon really needs a babysitter and I¡¯m not about to bail. I grab a towel off the top of the stack and go back to the stairs, making plenty of noise so that they can hear me. Sam walks down the stairs, ring at me when he passes. I keep my expression neutral so I don¡¯t show my loathing for him. This is his house after all and I¡¯m not trying to make things difficult for Deacon. I don¡¯t want to give Sam a real reason to kick me out and not let mee back. I try to put a smile on my face when I look at Deacon, but I know it looks fake as hell. Deacon gives me an apologetic smile. ¡°I¡¯m sorry about my brother,¡± he says. ¡°He worries about me.¡± ¡°Is everything okay?¡± I ask. ¡°Everything¡¯s great.¡± I bend down to clean up the juice mess. ¡°Here, let me do that,¡± Deacon says. He bends down to help. When he reaches for the towel, our fingers touch and he leans back as if the feel of my skin has shocked him somehow. When I look up at him, his mouth is open and he¡¯s staring right at my chest. ncing down at my shirt, I realize it¡¯s hanging wide open, the tops of my breasts spilling out of my bra, bared to him. My nipples are just barely hidden, but the pinks of my ares are showing. I hurry and sit back. I¡¯m just d Sam wasn¡¯t here to see it or he would¡¯ve said I did it on purpose. Deacon stands and won¡¯t make eye contact with me. The bulge in his pants is undeniable. He quickly covers it. I pretend not to notice. But I can¡¯t help the stirring it causes between my legs. From the looks of it, he¡¯s hung. Not that I¡¯m an expert on size. I¡¯ve never actually had sex with a man before. I¡¯ve gone down on boyfriends in the past, but they weren¡¯t nearly as big as Deacon looks. ¡°Do you want to meet Bailey?¡± he says, flushed. ¡°I¡¯d love to,¡± I say. Belongs ? to N?velDrama.Org. We go into Bailey¡¯s room and try to pretend nothing happened. I hear a car door m. Looking out the window, I see Sam¡¯s car speeding off. At least I don¡¯t have to deal with him anymore. Bailey is asleep in a ypen. The room is a makeshift nursery. It must¡¯ve been Sam¡¯s office before Deacon arrived. There¡¯s arge desk and papers everywhere, books on rare birds and taxw. Bailey is as cute as she can be, about a year old, curly blonde hair, and rosy cheeks from the heat. There¡¯s a pacifier in her mouth and a nket clutched in her little hands. ¡°She¡¯s adorable,¡± I say. When I look up at Deacon, he¡¯s staring at me again. It¡¯s a different look than he¡¯d given me before, as if he¡¯s actually just noticing me for the first time. Almost like he¡¯s studying me, trying to figure me out like I¡¯m someplicated puzzle needing to be pieced together. He¡¯s looking at me the way I¡¯d always wished he would when I was younger. Was it seeing my breasts that gave him this change of heart? Or maybe it has something to do with what Sam had said. Maybe Deacon¡¯s trying to makeparisons between me and his ex-wife. But I don¡¯t think so. If that were the case, I don¡¯t think his eyes would be as open and curious as they are right now. He¡¯d probably look at me with resentment. No, it¡¯s something else. It could be that he¡¯s checking to see if I really am infatuated with him like Sam had said. If that¡¯s the case, I¡¯m making it kind of obvious. When our eyes lock, I can¡¯t seem to look away. He¡¯s everything. Gorgeous, sweet, polite, and a great dad to his kid. I mean, what¡¯s not to swoon over? Finally, he breaks eye contact. He spreads his fingers apart, then balls them into fists, over and over again, a nervous tic. When he speaks, there¡¯s a slight tremor in his voice. ¡°Um, when Bailey wakes up, she¡¯ll probably need to be changed, and she¡¯ll be hungry. I have her foodbeled in the fridge.¡± ¡°Okay,¡± I say. ¡°We¡¯ll be fine. I¡¯ve spent every summer since I was fourteen babysitting for my mom¡¯s friends. I¡¯m great with kids. No need to worry.¡± His eyes widen. ¡°I¡¯m not worried.¡± ¡°Oh, I thought you might be. You look really nervous right now.¡± He shakes his head. ¡°No, it¡¯s just this new job has my stomach twisted. Not sure what to expect.¡± I nod even though I¡¯m pretty sure he¡¯s not being entirely truthful. I think he¡¯s nervous and it has something to do with me. He¡¯s been looking at me strangely ever since his argument with Sam. Babysitting is pretty boring. Bailey is asleep so I read most of the time. I don¡¯t want to watch TV downstairs for fear she¡¯ll wake up and I won''t hear her. Chapter 8 Chapter 8 I contemte going into Deacon¡¯s room. Just to see what it looks like. My guess is it¡¯s the one closest to the office so he can be near Bailey. It¡¯s the same room he had when this was his house. Bailey stirs. I nce over at her and she¡¯s watching me with a sleepy look on her face. She¡¯s the cutest baby I¡¯ve ever seen and looks so much like Deacon. From what I remember of Deacon¡¯s ex, she had dark, nearly ck hair and equally dark eyes. Bailey¡¯s hair is blonde like her dad¡¯s and she even has those same light green eyes too. ¡°Hi,¡± I say to her, smiling. Her chin wrinkles and starts to bob. I¡¯m a stranger. She¡¯s used to having her dad with her. She must be so scared. ¡°Oh, sweetie,e here,¡± I say, and pick her up when she starts to cry. She continues to whimper as I change her. When I¡¯m done, we go downstairs and I make her something to eat. The crying stops and she watches me like a nervous dog would. No yet sure if I¡¯m friend or foe. We y with toys and when she gets bored of those, I read to her. It doesn¡¯t seem to matter what the words are. She¡¯s more interested in the sound of my voice. So when we¡¯ve read through all the books in her small library of children¡¯s books, I read to her from the one I brought. It¡¯s a cozy mystery. Nothing with potential of scaring her. Just a good who-done-it. She tugs at a set of stic keys on a ring, ying contently as I read to her. After a few hours she starts to doze off. By far the easiest baby I¡¯ve ever taken care of out of all the children I¡¯ve ever babysat. I carry her to her room. Afraid of waking her, I sit on the floor and hold her on myp instead of putting her back in the ypen.Belongs ? to N?velDrama.Org. I¡¯m still reading to her, wanting her to feelforted by my voice even if she¡¯s asleep. She¡¯s in a new home, surrounded by new things, so I don¡¯t want her to feel alone or scared. Especially with her dad gone. Suddenly I have this strange feeling like I¡¯m being watched. When I look up, Deacon is standing there, leaning against the door jam. I have no idea how long he¡¯s been watching me. I smile at him. ¡°She¡¯s a big fan of literature. She needs more books. I have a ton of them leftover from my childhood. I¡¯d like to give them to her if that¡¯s okay with you,¡± I say. He has the strangest look on his face. So serious. He looks overwhelmed. Intense. I wonder if he had a bad day at work. ¡°Yeah, that¡¯s fine,¡± he says. 2 Deacon Seeing Remy sitting there, holding my child so lovingly, wakes something up inside of me. I want her¡ª no, I need her. I never once felt this way about my ex, Karen. It took weeks of dating before I was even attracted to her, if I was being honest. At the time I lived alone in a big house and I just wanted someone to share it with. Somehow I convinced myself it was her, even though I suspected she wasn¡¯t the one. I mean, who offers to suck a guy¡¯s dick an hour after they meet? That¡¯s what she did on our first date. It never urred to me until it was toote that she was like that with every man she was with. With Remy there was an instant connection when I saw her standing at the door. She has this inner light that radiates. The kind of smile that makes everyone else around her want to smile too. There¡¯s something so innocent about her, and yet there¡¯s no mistaking that she is all women. She brings out urges in me that I¡¯ve never had before. I want her. I want her more than I¡¯ve ever wanted anyone before. I need to im her. She has to be mine. I hadn¡¯t noticed before, but after Sam said something, I¡¯m starting to notice how she¡¯s looking at me. I thought maybe there was a mutual spark there between us, but at first I thought it was just wishful thinking. Now I see that it¡¯s more than just a friendly look between neighbors. When she was younger, I suspected she might¡¯ve had a crush on me by the way she was always peeking over the hedges to watch me wash my car. But she was just a kid. I was younger then. I felt younger. After the divorce, things changed. Women look at me still, but when I look at them, I see Karen¡¯s face. My ex-wife really did a number on me. She cheated. Slept with men I thought were friends. She went out every night and came home drunk in the early hours of the morning. Even when Bailey was colicky. I was at home with a sick baby, sometimes even winding up in the emergency room with our child while she was out having a good old time, not even bothering to answer my texts. Every time she came home she had a new excuse. Often saying her phone was dead, or she¡¯d forgotten her phone in her car. Thising from a woman who never let it out of her sight. She forgot I knew her better than that. I knew she just couldn¡¯t handle the pressure of motherhood, or the monogamy of marriage. I knew that before we got married, but somehow I¡¯d convinced myself she could change. Chapter 9 Chapter 9 Even though I try not to be, I¡¯m jaded. It¡¯s hard to let those past indiscretions go, no matter how hard I try to be bigger than that. After the divorce, I was certain I didn¡¯t want anything more than a casual hookup once in a while, but there¡¯s something different about Remy. I need to know if there¡¯s something there. ¡°How did things go today?¡± I ask her. She ces Bailey back in her ypen, then looks up at me with a smile that lights me up from head to toe. ¡°Perfect. It took a little while, but I think she¡¯s warmed up to me.¡± ¡°Great,¡± I say. ¡°The job is yours if you want it. Monday through Friday.¡± ¡°I would love it.¡± The way she says it, making eye contact, and softening her voice, causes chills to slide up my arms. She starts to leave the room, sliding around me in the doorway, but I can¡¯t let her leave. There¡¯s this pull toward her that suffocates my good judgment. I should just let her go. Let this be nothing more than a babysitting job as it was intended. I put my hands on her shoulders. She doesn¡¯t try to escape from my grip. Instead, she looks up at me, open and curious. The hallway is dark, casting a shadow over her face, but I can see every single one of hershes and the glimmer in her eyes. I lean over and smell her hair. Lavender and citrus. Clean, fresh. There¡¯s nothing tainted about her. Not like there had been with my ex who always smelled faintly of cigarette smoke and male cologne; a scent that belongs to bars and clubs. Remy is nothing like her. I don¡¯t know how I can say that for sure, but it¡¯s a feeling I have that won¡¯t let go. She inhales loud enough for me to hear. The air seems electrified. I don¡¯t know if she can feel it too, but it seems to crackle between us. There¡¯s definitely something here. I know it for sure now. With the tips of my fingers, I push her long hair off her shoulder, exposing the milky skin of her long, slender neck. Her breath quivers and she leans into my hand. ¡°I should go,¡± she whispers. Shit. I¡¯ve done something wrong. I¡¯ve gone too far. But she doesn¡¯t try to walk away. Instead she says, ¡°Before something happens.¡± ¡°What could happen?¡± I ask, my voice a husky whisper to match hers. She moves closer to me, her lips wet and parting. I lean over to kiss her, but before our lips can touch, the front door shuts and Sam¡¯s voice travels up the stairs. ¡°Deacon, you home?¡± ? N?velDrama.Org - All rights reserved. Sam¡¯s past warningse rushing back to me. He thinks Remy will break me like Karen did, but he¡¯s wrong. There¡¯s no telling Sam that, though. He warned me about Karen too and I hadn¡¯t listened then either. When he learned that we¡¯d separated, there was this smug, I-told-you-so air about him even though his words were consoling. He was always the favorite child. The one who had his shit together. The smart one. Everyone listens to Sam. Well, not this time. Not any time, really. Though he tries, I will not let him rule my life, be some lonely sad sack like he is. I can¡¯t even remember thest time he went out on a date. He probably tried being controlling with them, too. I bet he would even order for them at a restaurant. That sounds like something he would do. I¡¯m tired of it. I¡¯m a grown man and I¡¯ll make my own decisions. I want to hold Remy in my arms, but she jumps away from me when she hears his voice. She looks frazzled, like she¡¯s just been snapped out of a dream, her eyes glossy, face flushed. I want to tell her it¡¯s okay, and not to worry about what Sam thinks, but she moved away from me too quickly. ¡°I need to go,¡± she says, a tremor in her voice, clearly upset. I grab her wrist, my cock hardening at the feel of her soft skin in my hand. ¡°Your check,¡± I say, reaching into my pocket and handing it to her. She looks at my hard on. There¡¯s no way she doesn¡¯t see it. I don¡¯t try to hide it this time. I don¡¯t care if she knows how bad I want her. She takes the check from me, but avoids touching my hand again. ¡°Thanks. Same time tomorrow?¡± ¡°Yep,¡± I say. She rushes past Sam who¡¯sing up the stairs. Sam watches her leave. When the door closes behind her, he looks at me and says. ¡°I still don¡¯t trust her.¡± I shake my head. ¡°I promise you I have no intention of getting into another train wreck of a rtionship like I did with Karen,¡± I say, and I mean it. But I still don¡¯t think Remy is anything like Karen, so my words are mostly truthful. Iy in bed, staring up at the ceiling, but I can¡¯t sleep. So I get up and look out the window toward Remy¡¯s house. My heart stops when I see her through a split in her curtains. The light is on. She¡¯s wearing only a bra. I can¡¯t see the rest of her, though. Holding my breath, I wait to see if she¡¯ll take it off. Please take it off, I beg silently. She pulls her hair up into a messy bun on top of her head, exposing that long neck of hers again. Closing her eyes, she runs her hands over her body. Chapter 10 Chapter 10 ¡°What are you doing?¡± I whisper to the window. Her hands slide over her breasts and my cock hardens at the sight of her. When her head tilts back, I know she¡¯s enjoying the feel of her own skin, and I wonder if she¡¯s thinking of me. She nces out her window, looking right at my room. My light is off so I know she can¡¯t see me, but she¡¯s looking. Is she hoping I¡¯m watching? Is she hoping to see me too? Well, I¡¯m watching, sexy girl, so give me a show. She knows her curtains are open. She knows someone might see her. Luckily, Sam¡¯s room is on the other side of the house. She must know that, right? Did shee into my room? I picture her in here, looking through my things, rubbing herself against something that she thinks I might smell. Grinding against my pillow. Probably not, but the fantasy brings my body to life. I watch her touching, rubbing herself and I reach into my boxers, taking myself in my hand and start to rub. She turns her back to me. I can just see the swell of her hips but nothing below. From this angle it looks as though she¡¯s not wearing panties. She reaches behind her back, unhooking her bra. It drops to the ground. I¡¯m fully erect, my cock so hard it aches. I jerk it harder, resting my other hand on the windowsill to hold myself up. She¡¯s doing something with her hand in front of her. Has it slipped between her legs? I don¡¯t know, but again, I tell myself that¡¯s what she¡¯s doing. Beating faster, I¡¯m almost there, my breath rushing from my lungs, balls tightening. It¡¯sing, that pressure, the buildup before the explosion. Stroking, stroking, until finally release. I lean against the edge of the window, trying to catch my breath. After cleaning up the mess, I watch her until she puts on her nightgown and the light goes off, then I flop back in bed and finally fall asleep. 3 Remy Last night while I was in my room I felt as though I were being watched. I don¡¯t know if it was Deacon, but I hope it was. I made sure to stand exactly where I knew he¡¯d be able to see me. If I¡¯d have known for sure, I would¡¯ve shown him more skin. But on the off chance I was facing Sam¡¯s room, I didn¡¯t want toe off vulgar. The curtains were just open enough to where it might¡¯ve looked like they came apart by mistake, and I didn¡¯t make it entirely obvious I was touching myself. Just hinted at it. The thought of being watched was so thrilling. I¡¯ve never been that reckless before. It felt good. Unable to sleep well since Deacon moved back in next door, I go downstairs, sit at the kitchen, swirling cream and sugar into my coffee. I can¡¯t stop thinking about him and how close we came to kissing. What more could¡¯ve happened between us had Sam not walked in? Much more, I¡¯m sure. We might¡¯ve even gone for the gold, having wild, passionate sex right there in Sam¡¯s house. He would¡¯ve lost his mind had that happened. I can¡¯t help butugh when picturing his red face, blood pressure boiling over as he walked in on us, the scent of our lovemaking filling the air. I still can¡¯t believe Deacon¡¯s into me. All those years pining for him, picturing what it would be like to be with him, fantasizing about him falling in love with me. Then he moved away and I lost all hope. After he left I went on a few dates with boys my own age. I even liked one of them. His name was Trevor. He was tall with dirty blonde hair and light green eyes. He could¡¯ve been Deacon at a younger age, they were so simr in looks. He liked me too and the rtionship was going somewhere. He would climb the side of my house and sneak into my room nearly every night just to make out, never pushing me to go further than I wanted to. We talked about traveling to Europe after graduation, and he was exciting. yedcrosse and rode dirt bikes. So different from me. I was a home body. I liked homework and reading and fantasizing about things most girls my age never really thought about, like having a family and settling down. I thought maybe an adventure was what I needed. How would I really know what I wanted from my future unless I got out and experienced other things? One night, at a party, Trevor and I almost went all the way. We were kissing, fondling each other. Our clothes were off. Hey on top of me, rubbing against me and it felt amazing. I was even excited to lose my virginity. At the time I thought that¡¯s what made a girl a woman, and I really wanted to be a woman. But just as we were about to take our rtionship to the next step, I thought about Deacon. In my head it was Deacon¡¯s hands all over me, his lips kissing me, his body against mine. I felt so guilty because not once did I ever think about Trevor during that time. It wasn¡¯t fair to him, to be thinking about another man while we were about to have sex for the first time. I stopped him from going any further and ended up breaking up with him the next day. The entire reason our rtionship even existed in the first ce was because he looked like Deacon. It was wrong. The whole thing was just messed up. That was a year ago and I¡¯ve been single ever since.Belongs ? to N?velDrama.Org. Chapter 11 Chapter 11 My mind wanders back to Deacon andst night. I think about the way he smelled my hair and moved it off my shoulders to expose my neck. Thinking about how he leaned in to kiss me, has me giddy. Ignoring the reality of Sam¡¯s intrusion, I picture what could¡¯ve been. Deacon¡¯s and my lips touching, our tongues tangled passionately. Him lifting me off the ground, my legs wrapping around his waist while he carried me to his room andy me on his bed. Kissing, touching, learning about each other¡¯s bodies and the things we like. Until finally, he takes my virginity,ing inside of me, then falling into his arms. Breathless and weak, but content. There¡¯s a loud thunk as the coffee carafe ms onto the tabletop. It startles me out of my daydream. ¡°Cream?¡± my mom says. I look at her wide-eyed and a little afraid, as if she were reading my thoughts about Deacon creaming inside of me. ¡°What?¡± I ask. ¡°Are you still using the cream?¡± she asks. Feeling flushed, I say, ¡°Oh. No. Sorry,¡± and slide it across the table. She pours the cream in her coffee and sits back. ¡°So how was the babysitting job?¡± I take a breath to calm myself down. ¡°Fine. Cute kid. Easy to watch.¡± My voice sounds nervous. My words clipped. I hope she doesn¡¯t notice or ask any more questions. She sips her coffee, reading the wet newspaper. ¡°Good. Did he ask you to babysit again?¡± ¡°Yeah. He offered me the job.¡± ¡°Excellent,¡± she says without looking up from her paper. ¡°Maybe now you can start helping out with the phone bill.¡± I breathe a sigh of relief. ¡°No problem.¡± I head over to Deacon¡¯s again. This time I bring a bag full of children¡¯s books and vegetables from the garden. ¡°Hi,¡± Deacon says, his face lighting up when he answers the door. I feel my own face mirroring his. How is it possible that he looks even better today than he did yesterday? ¡°Hey, I brought some stuff for Bailey,¡± I say to him. ¡°That¡¯s so sweet of you.¡± He¡¯s definitely looking at me differently today. There¡¯s no doubt about it. Instead of looking away, his eyes skim my body. I can tell he¡¯s trying not to be too obvious about it, but he¡¯s not doing a very good job. Now I¡¯m almost certain he saw me through my windowst night. I want to ask him about it, see if he liked what he saw, but if he hadn¡¯t really seen me, I¡¯ll sound like a crazy person. Belongs ? to N?velDrama.Org. He lets me in the house. Looking back at the driveway, I see Sam¡¯s car isn¡¯t here, and I feel much more comfortable going inside. It¡¯s a good thing, because today I dressed a little sexier than I had before. Actually, today I¡¯m dressed simr to what I was wearing yesterday, shorts and a loose tank top, but today I forwent the bra. My nipples are hard as rocks, the silky fabric of my tank top rubbing against them. Impossible not to see through my shirt. He definitely notices those because his eyes go straight to them each time he turns to look at me and I notice he keeps himself slightly turned to the side at all times so I can¡¯t see the front of his pants. In the kitchen I wash the vegetables. Without realizing it, I¡¯m holding a cucumber under the water, rinsing the excess dirt off in stroking motions. Deacon watches with mischievous smile spread across his face. ¡°Oh my god,¡± I say, realizing when I finally figure out the mystery behind his smile. ¡°No, please continue,¡± he says through augh. ¡°I¡¯m curious about your technique.¡± I can¡¯t help butugh too and flick water at him. He ducks and keepsughing. Hees up behind me to escape any other water stter, and when he does, he touches my shoulders. It sends a shiver throughout my entire body. The chemistry between us is unmistakable. Electricity sizzles in the air and makes the hairs on my arms stand on end. My pussy aches each time his skin touches mine, even though he¡¯s not touching me in any kind of sexual way. That¡¯s never happened to me with the boys I¡¯ve dated. His fingers tickle down my arms. I inhale a sharp breath and I hear him let out a sound deep in his throat before pressing his body against mine, pinning me to the counter. I can feel his hard on against the cleft of my butt. I lean back and press against him. He groans and presses harder. Before things can go too far¡ªI want things to go too far¡ªBailey starts crying. Deacon sighs and backs away. I feel his presence still with me, still touching me even after he walks away, like a ghost of him still remains. He clears his throat. ¡°I don¡¯t know what came over me. I¡¯m so sorry. That was totally inappropriate. I hope I didn¡¯t make you feel ufortable,¡± he says. Chapter 12 Chapter 12 I turn to him. ¡°No,¡± I say desperately. ¡°Nothing you could do would ever make me feel ufortable.¡± His cheeks blush, and a smile quirks the side of his mouth. ¡°I should go check on Bailey.¡± She¡¯s really crying now, an angry, demanding sound. I swallow and shake off this heavy, lust-filled feeling. Maybe it¡¯s for the best we were interrupted. It¡¯s not like we could just strip right here and do it on his brother¡¯s countertop. I look around. Or could we? No. Definitely not. Sam coulde home at any moment and we would be caught. I don¡¯t want to give Sam a reason to hate me anymore than he already does. We go upstairs to the office to Bailey¡¯s ypen. She¡¯s standing up, reaching for her dad when she sees him. It¡¯s the most adorable thing in the world. Definitely a daddy¡¯s girl. And he¡¯s so good with her. There¡¯s just something so sexy about a man holding his child. He picks her up and they sit on the floor. Bailey¡¯s tears stop. She must remember me from yesterday, because she reaches her little hand toward me. I take it and sit beside them. ¡°Wow, she¡¯s really picky about the people she lets near me,¡± Deacon says. ¡°She¡¯s kind of territorial. She must really like you.¡± I cross my eyes, making funny faces at her, getting her tough. ¡°I like her too.¡± He starts to hum a tune, a luby I remember from my own childhood. I hum along. I can¡¯t help myself. He smiles, encouragingly, so I start to sing the words and he sings along too. He has a great singing voice, and I was always given solos when I was in the school choir so I know I sing well too. Bailey seems to like it. Her smile stretches her chubby cheeks and she lets out happy gurgling sounds. After a few minutes she¡¯s dozing off. By the end of the song, she¡¯s passed out. Deaconys her in the ypen and I step out of the room into the dark hallway. This is where we were standing yesterday when he moved the hair from my shoulder and we almost kissed. Hees toward me, but stops before getting too close. His eyes are intense, focused on mine. The need in them is undeniable. They sparkle in the low light, begging for something more. I step up to him, letting him know I¡¯m ready and willing. I want this kiss more than I¡¯ve ever wanted anything in my life. N?velDrama.Org owns this. Only, instead of closing the gap between us, he takes a step back. He¡¯s reluctant about it. Did I read him wrong? In the kitchen it seemed like he really wanted me. I feel so confused right now, and torn. I know if we kiss, or if things go any further, that might change the dynamic between us. It might screw up this whole arrangement. Maybe he¡¯s afraid if we sleep together and things change between us, he won¡¯t have someone to take care of Bailey while he goes to work. I can¡¯t me him. I know how hard it would be for him to find someone he trusts to watch his daughter. ¡°I should get to work,¡± he says, his voice hesitant, as if he doesn¡¯t really want to leave. I want to tell him to stay, to be with me, but I don¡¯t want him to get in trouble at work. I don¡¯t want to be selfish. ¡°Of course. Don¡¯t worry about a thing.¡± ¡°Surprisingly, I don¡¯t worry about anything knowing you¡¯re watching my daughter. I¡¯m always worried about her otherwise, but I can see she¡¯s in capable hands.¡± These hands are capable of other things too, not just watching children. They¡¯re capable of making him very happy. I want to show him that. I want to tell him that, but I can¡¯t. Not without changing things between us that might not be for the good. He leaves for work. I watch him from the window as he pulls out of the driveway and heads down the road. Once he¡¯s out of sight, I go to his room. All these years wondering what it was like in there. I need to see it for myself. The first thing I do is go to the window where there¡¯s a direct view to my room. So it¡¯s possible that he was watching mest night. There are fingerprint smudges there. Had he watched me and touched the window? I look around at the rest of the room. He has a queen size bed with a blue sheet set and matching comforter. Such a bachelor room. It¡¯s very sparse on the decoration, and everything is nd, dark colors. Kicking off my shoes, I flop back on his bed, sprawled out, moving my hands like I would if I were making a snow angel on the cool fabric of hisforter. I can smell him on the sheets, the leathery musk of his cologne, the soap he uses, and the gel he wears in his hair. Putting his pillow over my face, I hug it tight and breathe in deep. I¡¯m so turned on right now, I can hardly stand it. I used to masturbate with my pillow when I would think of him. That was before I was old enough to go to the sex shops and buy myself toys. I would take my body pillow and pretend it was him, get naked and then rub against it until, well, you know. I¡¯m half tempted to use his pillow as my new y thing, maybe switch it out for one of my own. I could take Bailey when she wakes up and run over to my house. All I¡¯d have to do is put his pillowcase on it. Chapter 13 Chapter 13 Smiling, I take the pillow off of my face when it gets too hot. When I do, I see a dark figure in the doorway and yelp, my heart racing a million miles an hour. Deacon stands there, a crooked smile on his face. ¡°Hi,¡± he says. Flushed, I ask, ¡°What are you doing here? Why aren¡¯t you at work?¡± I sit up and start to stand, but he says, ¡°No, stay there.¡± It feels a little like I¡¯m in trouble. Like when I did something wrong as a kid and I was made to stay on my bed and not move. Belonging ? N?velDram/a.Org. ¡°I called in sick,¡± he says, moving toward the bed. Toward me. My breathinges faster. ¡°I couldn¡¯t stop thinking about you. There¡¯s a connection here. I know you feel it.¡± I lean back until I¡¯m lying on his bed, my breath nowing in heavy bursts as he leans over me. I nod because my voice is caught in my throat. He grabs my arms and raises them above my head. Letting out a low moan, I wee this aggressive side of him. He bridges the gap between us until our lips are touching. It¡¯s a gentle kiss at first. An introduction, his lips getting to know mine. His are soft, yet eager. His weight settles on me, fingers curling in my hair. I love how his body fits perfectly with mine. Our hips and chests meshing together as if we were made for each other. I can feel his heartbeat against me, moving just as fast as mine. He seems so confident, but his heartbeat suggests he¡¯s nervous too. Or maybe he¡¯s just as excited to be with me as I am to finally be with him. I can¡¯t believe this is finally happening. All my adolescent dreams areing true and I try to memorize the feeling of him against me, the sound of his breath, the smell of him, in order to keep this memory with me always. Our tongues meet, twisting and writhing. Limbs intertwine. I slip his shirt over his head, mussing up his hair. His skin is hot to the touch, taut over his muscles. I love the smoothness of him against my fingers. Looking down between us, I see his hard on straining to get out of his jeans. I¡¯m all too eager to help him with that. He raises up to give me plenty of room to work as I unzip his jeans and slip my hand into his boxers, gasping when I feel howrge he is. How will that ever fit? A tendril of fear shivers through me when I think about the pain of having sex for the first time. Especially with someone so big. I know it¡¯s not likely, but I can¡¯t help but worry that it won¡¯t fit. Somehow he manages to get his jeans off with one hand. His boxers slip down over his narrow waist, and I see just how intimidating he really is. I¡¯m nervous, but at the same time I¡¯m more turned on than I¡¯ve ever been. His skin is smoldering and silky. I wrap my hand around his massive manhood, slowly stroking. He lets out a deep, masculine growl that sends goose bumps prickling up my arms. It¡¯s as if I¡¯ve awoken a beast. Suddenly he¡¯s tearing off my clothes, his eyes feral with lust. I¡¯m a rag doll, being bent and positioned roughly. This wild side of him is such a turn on, and I realize the difference between a boy and a man are worlds apart. My ex, Trevor, was a terrible substitute for the real thing. My clothes are off in seconds. He sits back, just looking at me. It makes me a little self-conscious being exposed like this, but the intense look on his face lets me know he likes what he sees and all I want to do is please him, so I make sure not to curl in on myself like I want. I stay open to him, let him see every part of me, every w, every freckle. ¡°You are the sexiest woman I¡¯ve ever seen,¡± he says in a deep, sultry voice. He¡¯s kissing me again, licking, biting at my bottom lip, while his hands explore my breasts. I never really knew just how sensitive my nipples were until now. Every time he tweaks one, it sends a curl of lightning down to my clit which feels swollen and neglected while the rest of my body gets all the attention. But that¡¯s okay, because I know when he finally does get around to touching me there, it will be worth the wait. He takes one of my breasts into his mouth, growling like a dog with a toy he doesn¡¯t want to share with anyone else. He¡¯s so possessive over my body. I¡¯ve never felt this wanted, or lusted over before. Then he switches breasts, making sure each has its fair share of attention. When hees up for air, he says, ¡°You have the most perfect tits.¡± He squeezes one and licks his way around the are. ¡°And the cutest little nipples.¡± He takes them both, holding them. ¡°These belong to me now,¡± he says possessively. ¡°No one else can touch them.¡± ¡°My entire body is yours,¡± I say desperately. ¡°I want only you. I¡¯ve always wanted only you.¡± He sits back, looking curiously at me, while still holding my breasts in his hands. ¡°Always?¡± Chapter 14 Chapter 14 ¡°Since I was thirteen,¡± I say. ¡°I¡¯ve had the biggest crush on you. You must¡¯ve noticed. I wasn¡¯t very good at hiding it.¡± N?velDrama.Org owns this. Heughs. ¡°I had a feeling when you starteding out of your house every time I did. I saw you a few time staring at me too.¡± I feel myself blushing, but I don¡¯t care. I want him to know. ¡°I was a little obsessed with you.¡± ¡°Oh yeah?¡± he says and kisses one of my nipples. ¡°Did you fantasize about us being together?¡± ¡°All the time.¡± He sucks nearly my entire breast into his mouth and starts to suck and nibble. The pressure between my legs builds until I feel like I might burst. When he lets go he asks, ¡°What kinds of things did you picture me doing to you?¡± he asks. His hand runs along the skin of my inner thigh,ing awfully close to the dip between my legs, but he never goes that far. It¡¯s like he knows the agony I¡¯m in and wants to torture me. My hands go to the tight globes of his ass cheeks. I push his boxers down to his knees, as far as I can reach. He pushes them down the rest of the way until they¡¯re at his ankles and he kicks them off. We are both entirely naked how. It¡¯s terrifying and thrilling all at the same time. And though there¡¯s nothing in the way now, he has amazing restraint. I arch toward him, but he manages to keep our hips from touching. ¡°I pictured you touching me¡ª¡± I nod, ¡°down there. He smiles and chuckles. ¡°You mean your pussy?¡± he says. I blush. I don¡¯t know why it¡¯s such an embarrassing word for me to say. I¡¯m an adult, after all. I¡¯m eighteen. But for some reason it stills feels like a bad word to say. ¡°Yes,¡± I say. ¡°My pussy.¡± I try the word out. It¡¯s weird. A little naughty, a little embarrassing, but I like it. Feels sexy. And I can tell by the way Deacon starts to lose his smile, his features bing sharper, intense, that it turns him on too. ¡°I used to imagine you sneaking into my room when my window was left open on summer nights. You would strip me down and wake me up by licking my pussy.¡± He makes low sound in his throat. His hands squeezing my breasts harder, painfully pinching my nipples until my pussy starts to leak everywhere. I can feel the puddle growing on sheets beneath my ass. ¡°What else,¡± he says, his voice barely a whisper as he spreads my legs apart and squeezes the skin of my inner thigh as if it¡¯s taking all his restraint to keep from tearing me open. ¡°And then you would fuck me.¡± Suddenly these naughty words feel right and theye spilling out of me as if they were always there, held captive, just waiting for the right time to escape. ¡°You would m your cock so deep into me that I would have to bite my pillow to keep from screaming. When I became too loud, you would flip me onto my stomach and push my face into the pillow as you fucked me from behind.¡± His hands are still gripping my inner thighs, but his face looks a little dumbstruck. He stays like that for several seconds and I start to wonder if I went too far. Then a smile forms on his lips and keeps stretching until it fills his entire face. ¡°Wow. And here I thought when young girls have crushes on older men, it¡¯s all about nice dinners and romantic gestures.¡± I smile up at him. ¡°Those are good too,¡± I say. Heughs and kisses me on the lips, a quick peck that bes a slow kiss until developing into a heated, sensual make-out session. His lips taste so good. While his lips move down to my neck, his hands move up my thighs, spreading my legs further. He¡¯s massaging the puffy skin of my outerbia, pinching and pulling. I wrap my arms around his neck, thrusting my hips up toward him, mewling and whispering, ¡°oh fuck,¡± as the engorged feeling in my pussy bes more prominent. ¡°I need you inside of me,¡± I tell him. Though I¡¯ve never had sex, something instinctual tells me that¡¯s the only relief for the pressure I feel building up. The tip of his finger finds the top of my clit and he starts to rub in slow circles, and I¡¯m yelling his name, feeling as though I willunch out of this bed, right through the ceiling. I¡¯ve masturbated a thousand times, but it¡¯s never felt like this. It¡¯s apletely different experience when you¡¯re turned on so much that there¡¯s no oxygen going to your brain and you feel half-crazy with lust, and someone else is doing all the touching for you. It¡¯s mind blowing. It¡¯s more that I can take. The orgasm is on top of me before I even realize it¡¯sing. I¡¯m making choking sounds and my body is lurching, spasming. At first I think we¡¯re done, because when I¡¯m touching myself, that¡¯s all there is. The build-up, the release, and done. But Deacon keeps rubbing and I realize, no, it¡¯s not done. That powerful feeling just keeps building and building, until it¡¯s almost painful, and I¡¯m thinking we should probably stop before the pain gets worse, but he keeps rubbing and instead of the pain getting worse, something inside of me breaks open and pleasure explodes in bursts and I¡¯ming anding, and stilling. My mouth opens and a cryes out without me even realizing what¡¯s happening. He keeps rubbing and I keeping for an entire minute until finally the ebb starts to take me back down. Chapter 15 Chapter 15 Deacon is kissing the side of my breast, watching my face with a teasing smile. ¡°How was that?¡± he asks. ¡°What the fuck just happened?¡± I say, breathless and a little confused. How had I been masturbating for years and never knew it could be like that? It¡¯s almost like a betrayal, like my body has been lying to me this entire time. He buries his face between my breasts and startsughing. Like, crack-upughing. I feel kind of dumb, like some ignorant little girl instead of the sexual woman I try to portray myself to be. ¡°You¡¯ve never had an orgasm before?¡± he says when he finally stopsughing. I¡¯m still breathless, my heart pounding in the back of my neck. ¡°Not like that. Nothing close to being like that.¡± He looks at me, smug now when he smiles. ¡°Oh, honey, that¡¯s nothingpared to the things I n to do to you.¡± A shiver rolls through me and it feels a little like Christmas right now. I¡¯m so excited I can hardly sit still. He kisses his way down my body until his head is between my spread legs. At first he just teases me. A nibble here, a bite there. My body reacts. Just knowing he¡¯s down there is enough to turn me on. Then his tongue reaches out, touching that most delicate spot and it¡¯s as though the rest of the world has just slipped away into the abyss. I close my eyes, marveling in the feelings he¡¯s giving me. He sucks at the skin of mybia, nursing at my clit. Tongue driving deep. Drinking in my excitement. He¡¯s so focused. The skin on his forehead tightens as he concentrates on bringing me pleasure. When hees up for air, he says, ¡°Your pussy tastes so good.¡± Then he¡¯s diving back in. I hold the back of his head, running my fingers through his thick hair. He fits his entire mouth around my pussy, hungry for it. Sucking and licking as if he¡¯s afraid to miss a single drop. A wonderful warmth spreads through my body, reaching out to my limbs and I lie here feeling as if I¡¯m glowing from the inside out. I¡¯ve never felt like this. It was always awkward and confusing with other boyfriends when we¡¯d fool around and it was obvious that neither of us had enjoyed the experience as much as we should have. Maybe it¡¯s because Deacon is older and more experienced. He seems to know exactly what my body needs exactly when it needs it. He slips his finger in, and though I¡¯ve been fingered before¡ªincluding by myself¡ªit¡¯s as if he¡¯s found some kind of secret passage, a pleasure center that¡¯s been hidden my whole life and only his finger is the key to unlocking it. N?velDrama.Org owns this. I let out a loud moan despite trying to be painfully quiet as not to wake up the baby. It¡¯s probably too late for that now. I already cried out more than once. He tries a second finger. It¡¯s an ufortably narrow fit. ¡°Jesus, you¡¯re tight,¡± he says. I almost tell him it¡¯s because I¡¯ve never had anything more than one finger in there before. I¡¯m afraid to tell him I¡¯m a virgin, afraid it¡¯ll scare him away. I don¡¯t want this to stop. I don¡¯t want him to think of me as the little kid next door. I¡¯m a woman now, and I don¡¯t want toe off as anything else. I take his hand and move it before he realizes I¡¯m a virgin. ¡°I need you,¡± I tell him. ¡°I want you inside of me.¡± He climbs his way up my body, kissing me the entire time. While he¡¯s on top, he looks at my eyes and he¡¯s so insanely handsome. I can¡¯t believe this is actually going to happen with him. All of those adolescent fantasies finallying to life. I can hardly stand the anticipation. The head of his cock rubs against my clit, both of us wet and slick, driving me wild. He starts to push into me and when he does there¡¯s a slight tinge of pain. He stops, hitting my barrier. His brow furrows. There¡¯s a long pause, him studying my face before he finally says, ¡°You¡¯re a virgin?¡± I take a long breath. There¡¯s no sense in lying. It¡¯s pretty obvious. ¡°I am.¡± He lets out a disappointed sigh, and my heart clenches. ¡°Remy, your first time should be with someone you care about.¡± He starts to pull out, but I grab his hips, holding him in ce. ¡°There¡¯s no one else I would rather lose my virginity to. I¡¯ve been in love with you since I was thirteen- years-old. No one has ever made me feel the way you have. I¡¯ve always been waiting for you,¡± I say. ¡°I want to do this with you and only you.¡± The hunger in his stare intensifies. His lips devour mine, our tongues shing together, twisting and writhing around each other. ¡°Are you sure you want this?¡± he says, breathless, when our lips part. His thumb traces the curve of my bottom lip. Chapter 16 Chapter 16 ¡°Of course I¡¯m sure. I¡¯ve never been more sure about anything in my life,¡± I say. He moves the hair out of my eyes and kisses my forehead. ¡°This might hurt.¡± ¡°I know. It¡¯s okay,¡± I assure him. ¡°I want it.¡± He reaches down between my legs and starts to rub my clit as he moves the head of his cock in and out of me, slightly pressing against my virgin wall. I let out a moan, my eyes rolling back in my head. It feels amazing. Then he pushes inside of me. There¡¯s a sharp, knife-like stab as the barrier brakes, a jagged, cutting pain as he drives all the way into me. My breath catches, too startled to make a sound. He doesn¡¯t move, allowing my body to adjust to this new feeling. Suddenly I gasp after holding my breath for so long. ¡°Hey, are you okay?¡± he asks, looking down at me with concern. The pain doesn¡¯tst long. It¡¯s mostly shock that keeps my mouth and eyes open. I nod my head. ¡°Yeah, I¡¯m fine.¡± He kisses my lips and it¡¯s the most gentle, tender kiss anyone has ever given me. He starts to move, sliding in an out of me. This time it feels good. ¡°Is this all right?¡± he asks. The more be moves, the better it feels. I close my eyes and smile. ¡°It¡¯s perfect.¡± His eyes close, and his face is abination of pleasure and pain. ¡°Jesus, your pussy is so fucking tight. You feel amazing.¡± He goes slowly at first, and it¡¯s wonderful. If someone would¡¯ve told me how awesome this feels, I might¡¯ve lost my virginity years ago. But all anyone ever talked about was the horrible pain it caused. No one ever said it onlysts a second and once it¡¯s gone, the sex is fucking mind blowing. Either I have shitty friends, or they¡¯ve had shitty sexual experiences. Or maybe it¡¯s just because Deacon knows what the hell he¡¯s doing. Going slow is fine for a little while, but there¡¯s this need for him, this ache low in my groin. I raise my hips to meet his thrusts until I¡¯m mming into him, our hip bones colliding. He smiles. ¡°So you want it harder, huh?¡± I grab his ass, squeezing. ¡°Yes, I want you to fuck me,¡± I demand. He sits back on his knees, grabbing my legs and resting my ankles on his shoulders. He lifts my ass into the air. The next time he ms into me, he bottoms out and I scream. It¡¯s so deep, this new sensation. Startling, and confusing, and wonderful. Almost painful, but not exactly. He¡¯s still thrusting hard when he says, ¡°Holy shit, I¡¯ve never felt a cunt so tight. You¡¯re killing me, girl. I don¡¯t think I can hold it in much longer. I¡¯m going to fuck my seed right into your womb.¡± His words shock me at first. He¡¯s not wearing a condom. I guess I didn¡¯t really think about that when we started. Once I did, I just figured he¡¯d pull out. I never thought that he would actually want toe inside of me. But now that he says it, I picture my belly big and round with his child, and I can¡¯t think of anything I want more. ¡°Do it,¡± I say. ¡°You sure?¡± he asks. ¡°Yes, please, do it.¡± The second the words leave my mouth, he lets out a thunderous growl and I feel his cock spasm inside of me as he shoots his load. I can feel it hot and creamy, coating my walls. When he¡¯s drained, we both copse on the bed together, panting and happy. 4 Deacon I don¡¯t want to go to work. There¡¯s nowhere else I want to be other than in this bed with Remy. It¡¯s almost frightening how fast I¡¯ve fallen for her. The connection between us in just thesest couple of days surpasses anything Karen and I ever had. Remy is so much more. The fact that she let mee inside of her, and the look of wonder on her face when I told her I wanted to impregnate her, just sets everything in stone. I want her pregnant with my child. I want to see part of me growing inside of her, proof of our love. I kiss the t part of her stomach below her belly button, picturing her round and pregnant. I¡¯m starting to get hard again. ¡°You know you can get pregnant from meing inside of you?¡± I ask. She gives me a teasing look. ¡°Oh, is that how that works?¡± Belongs ? to N?velDrama.Org. ¡°Smart ass. What I meant was ¡­ it could happen and I wouldn¡¯t be upset about it.¡± She leans over and kisses me, the most beautiful smile on her face. ¡°Neither would I.¡± She sits up and stands. A drop of my cum rolls down the inside of her leg. She walks over to the window and stands in front of it, her perfect naked ass facing me. She has an incredible body. So tight and pert. Seeing her standing there like that has my cock aching. ¡°Did you watch mest night?¡± she asks. She breathes on the window, fogging it up to show my fingerprints where I¡¯d leaned against the window to hold myself up while jerking off to her touching herself. Chapter 17 Chapter 17 ¡°You did that on purpose for me to watch, didn¡¯t you?¡± I say, walking up behind her. I wrap my arms around her. N?velDrama.Org owns this. ¡°I hoped you would,¡± she says, rubbing her ass against my hard dick. I slip my cock into her dripping pussy. She gasps. ¡°Well I did and I stroked myself while I watched.¡± Holding onto her belly, I push my cock deep inside of her with hard thrusts. Her tits and the side of her face are pressed against the window. She screams my name. There¡¯s a man walking his dog down on the sidewalk below us. If he looks up he¡¯ll get quite the show. Part of me hopes he looks up and witnesses me fucking this goddess. ¡°I¡¯m going to fuck my load into you again,¡± I tell her, pounding, drilling my way into her tight cunt. ¡°I¡¯m going to fill you with my cum and watch your pregnant belly grow.¡± Again, to my surprise, she says, ¡°Fuck yes, I want it. I want to be big and round with your child.¡± Picturing her naked and pregnant, a big swollen belly, sets me off and I dump another load of cum inside of her. I keep my cock buried in her for several minutes. Once I¡¯m deted, I finally pull out. Her pussy is so tight, even after all that fucking, she barely drips. I turn her around to face me. Her breasts are cold to the touch from being pressed against the window. As much as I want to stay here and bask in the afterglow, if I don¡¯t get to work, I¡¯ll be fired, and that will make starting this new family together much harder than it should be. She goes over to the bed andys down, her body spent after the workout it¡¯s been given. She wraps the sheets around her waist, leaving her beautiful milky breasts exposed. I lean over and kiss one. I can¡¯t help myself. They¡¯re just so perfect and silky smooth. She runs her fingers through my hair and lets out the sexiest little moan. I¡¯m already getting turned on again. But there¡¯s nothing I can do about it. For one, I will be eventer than I already am, and two, I don¡¯t want her to be too sore after the two poundings she just took. ¡°That was amazing,¡± she says. It was better than amazing. It took sex to a whole other level. ¡°Yes it was.¡± I still can¡¯t believe she was a virgin. I have to admit, being with someone so pure and untouched is every man¡¯s fantasy; I¡¯m no exception. It¡¯s a caveman thing, I think. Conquering a mountain. Being the first man to nt his g. I was the first to nt my seed, to hopefully watch it grow. She¡¯ll be mine and only mine forever if everything goes right. I grumble. ¡°I have to get to work,¡± I say reluctantly. ¡°No time for another quickie?¡± she says, curling up against me. I let out a torturedugh. ¡°You have no idea how tempted I am to do just that, but I can¡¯t beter than I already am. As it stands, Sam is going to be pissed. He¡¯s the reason I got the job in the first ce.¡± She kisses my arm. ¡°I understand. No need to make Sam hate me more than he already does.¡± ¡°He doesn¡¯t hate you,¡± I say. ¡°Yes he does.¡± ¡°Okay, maybe a little.¡± Sheughs and it¡¯s a sound that warms up my chest and makes me feel full inside. It lets me know even more than I already do that this thing between us is meant to be. With Remy I feel whole again. I¡¯m going well over the speed limit to get to work. I¡¯m alreadyte, but theter I am, the worse off I¡¯ll be. Pulling into the space next to Sam¡¯s car, I get out of my pickup and tuck my shirt in. I was hoping to get inside the building undetected, but I¡¯m about halfway there when Sam walks out. He sees me before I can hide behind one of these cars. He makes a B-line toward me, his crisp gelled hair staying stiff in ce despite the breeze. ¡°It¡¯s already starting,¡± he says,ying into me without even a ¡®hello¡¯ first. ¡°What are you talking about, Sam?¡± Normally, a confrontation with my brother would instantly put me in a bad mood, but after what just happened between me and Remy, nothing can get me down. Not even Sam and his doom and gloom. He says, ¡°You¡¯re making the same mistakes you made with Karen.¡± I open my mouth to speak, but Sam talks right over me. ¡°Don¡¯t act like you don¡¯t know what I¡¯m talking about.¡± He looks me up and down, shaking his head distastefully. Still the high and mighty little shit he always was. ¡°Before you try to deny it, take a good look at yourself. You just started the job I helped you get, and you¡¯re already runningte.¡± He throws his hands up in frustration. ¡°And for Christ¡¯s sake, pull up your zipper.¡± I fight back a smile. When I yank up my zipper, it makes a short rasp sound. I realize now that Sam will never change. Even as kids he tried micromanaging my life. He worried about everything, always more of a mother than a brother. Chapter 18 Chapter 18 ¡°Remy is going to ruin your life,¡± he says. ¡°It¡¯s already started.¡± There¡¯s no sense in denying my feelings for Remy any longer. I¡¯m obviously not hiding them very well. ¡°Remy is nothing like Karen. You don¡¯t know her. You¡¯ve never bothered to try,¡± I say. He res at me. ¡°Neither have you until recently.¡± His voice is heated, rising loud enough to call attention to our argument. The longer I stand out here, theter I will be for work and the more trouble I¡¯ll be in with my boss. I¡¯m on a probation period for the next couple of months. Though beingte to be with Remy was well worth it, I can¡¯t afford to lose this job. Even if it means being stuck most of the day with Sam. ¡°Keep your voice down,¡± I hiss. ¡°Not everyone needs to know our business.¡± ¡°Well, it¡¯s true,¡± he says, quieter this time. Maybe it is true. I never really tried to get to know Remy when I lived next door to her. She was just a kid back then. It would¡¯ve been inappropriate. But I do know she¡¯s nothing like Karen. I¡¯ve watched her grow up. She was the neighborhood sweetheart. All the neighbors used to say what a good kid she was. Like how she used to mow Mrs. Holister¡¯swn without being asked and without expecting to be paid for it. She did it because she saw an old woman who was in need. Karen never would¡¯ve done anything like that. She didn¡¯t know what the word charity even meant. I remember once Remy¡¯s mom telling me how Remy used to find battered and broken animals and bring them back home, nursing them back to health. Birds, possums, and even a baby skunk. She¡¯s motherly and nurturing. Two things what were never built into Karen¡¯s DNA. I saw that from the very beginning of our marriage, but I didn¡¯t want it to be true, so I ignored the signs. My eyes are wide open now, and I see Remy for who she really is, and she¡¯s exactly what I want. I should¡¯ve never been with Karen. I¡¯m d I was because of Bailey, but if I could¡¯ve had Bailey with Remy instead, I would¡¯ve been better off. Karen was rude, hot tempered, and just not a good person in general. ¡°I know her better than you think I do,¡± I say. Sam touches my shoulder, but I push him away. ¡°I need to get inside before I get fired,¡± I say and walk past him. It¡¯s a grueling eight hours, but at least I didn¡¯t get written up for beingte. No one seemed to notice. All day, the only thing I can think about is getting back to Remy. Whatever this thing is between us feels more real than any other rtionship I¡¯ve ever been in before. Belonging ? N?velDram/a.Org. I pull into the driveway and see a car parked in front I¡¯ve never seen before. I go inside and Sam is standing next to an older woman who I¡¯ve also never seen before. ¡°Where¡¯s Bailey,¡± I ask, assuming Remy must be upstairs with her. ¡°In her ypen,¡± Sam says. He has a look on his face I don¡¯t quite trust. Like he¡¯s hiding something. I go upstairs, taking two steps at a time in a rush to see my daughter and Remy. But when I go into the office, Remy isn¡¯t there. Just Bailey, standing up, crying. I pick her up and go back downstairs. ¡°What the hell is going on?¡± I ask, trying not to raise my voice so I don¡¯t upset Bailey more than she already is. ¡°Where¡¯s Remy and why the hell was my daughter alone upstairs crying her eyes out?¡± I¡¯m pissed, and not doing a very good job at holding in temper in front of this stranger. I know Remy wouldn¡¯t just leave Bailey alone like this. Sam has done something. I feel it in my bones. ¡°I sent Remy home,¡± Sam says, raising his chin and setting his shoulders. If I weren¡¯t with my child and this old woman, I would hit that smug look right off his face. ¡°What do you mean you sent her home?¡± I demand. ¡°I didn¡¯t think it was appropriate to have her here anymore, and so I had a babysitting service send someone over. This is Deloris.¡± I look at the stranger, my blood boiling over. She has a stern mouth, no trace of the patience or tenderness it takes to watch a busy infant. I¡¯m sure she¡¯s perfectlypetent, and no doubt a babysitting service runs background checks, but this isn¡¯t the face I want my child to see day in and day out while I¡¯m working. I want Bailey to feel secure. Remy has a way with her warm smiles and gentle voice of putting people at ease. That¡¯s the face I want my child seeing every day. That¡¯s the face I want to see every day. ¡°You had no right,¡± I say, voice dipping dangerously low. I hope he hears the threat in it and isn¡¯t as stupid as he looks. ¡°Actually, I do. I have every right. This is my house now, and I say who gets to be in it. And I don¡¯t want Remy here,¡± he says defiantly. Chapter 19 Chapter 19 ¡°You don¡¯t get to say who watches my child. You¡¯ve crossed a line this time.¡± I look at Deloris and ask, ¡°Is there any way I could get you to stay a little while longer?¡± She looks confused. So does Sam. ¡°I suppose I can,¡± she says. ¡°Thank you.¡± I press my lips against Bailey¡¯s cheek and blow ¡®kissy bubbles¡¯ against her cheek. She loves the sound and tickle of it, and is always good for a guaranteedugh. When I¡¯m sure she¡¯s happy and won¡¯t cry, I hand her off to the sitter. As I walk toward the door, Sam calls out, ¡°Where are you going?¡± I m the door without answering. I¡¯m on the phone, dialing Remy¡¯s number. She doesn¡¯t pick up. Fear and anger surge through me. What if Sam said something to ruin things between me and Remy permanently. This rtionship is new and already full of drama. Remy is smart and beautiful and could have any guy she wants. It¡¯s not like she needs to stay and take this kind of abuse. She might think she¡¯s in love with me after having this crush for years, but how long will it take for her to see this broken life of mine isn¡¯t what she signed up for? I dial the number again, and again she doesn¡¯t pick up. I want to throw my phone in the street and watch it shatter. I march across the street. Her mom¡¯s car is out front and once I go to her house and Remy¡¯s mom sees how upset I am, she will know there¡¯s something going on between me and her daughter. I doubt she will approve. Her daughter is barely out of high school and I¡¯m twelve years older with an infant and an ex-wife. I don¡¯t exactly have a great track record with women, but that would¡¯ve been different had I ever known anyone like Remy. Remy probably won¡¯t want her mom to know about us this early in the game either, but I have to see her. I need to know she¡¯s all right. I knock on the door. Each second that ticks by without it opening feels like an eternity. I¡¯m about to knock harder when it opens. Remy stands in the doorway wearing a summer dress with no bra. Her pert nipples are hard beneath it. It takes all my self-control not to scoop her up and carry her away with me. Her long blonde hair cascades over her sun-kissed shoulders. The skin around her eyes is puffy and red, as though she¡¯d been wiping at them. Had she been crying? ¡°Did Sam hurt you?¡± I insist. She won¡¯t look at me. I take her chin in my hand and turn her head so our eyes meet. ¡°Tell me.¡± A tear slides down her cheek. I swear to god there¡¯s a bull inside of me about to break out of my skin and go next door to pummel my brother into the ground. I should¡¯ve known better than to move in with him. He¡¯s always been a control freak and always will. But then again, if I hadn¡¯t moved in with him, I never would¡¯ve connected with Remy. That makes dealing with all of Sam¡¯s bullshit worth it. Still, I would love to hit the guy right now. ¡°Sam thinks I¡¯m going to ruin your life,¡± she says in the most fragile voice I¡¯ve ever heard. It brings out the protective instincts in me, wanting to protect what¡¯s mine. I want to wrap my arms around her and make sure no one ever hurts her again. She continues, ¡°He hired someone else to watch Bailey and told me to leave. He wants me to stay and away and think about all the reasons I¡¯m wrong for you.¡± Her chin trembles and more tears fall from her eyes. ¡°But I can¡¯t think of a single one. I care about you and Bailey. I would never do anything to hurt either of you.¡± She pauses, then shakes her head. ¡°But maybe he¡¯s right. How will this ever work between us when your brother already hates me?¡± I take her by the shoulders, holding her firmly in my hands. ¡°Fuck Sam. He doesn¡¯t matter. He doesn¡¯t know what I want or what I need in my life.¡± I lean forward, kissing her on the lips. She hesitates, then pulls away. ¡°I can¡¯t. My mom¡¯s upstairs.¡± I take her by the hand. ¡°What are you doing?¡± she asks. ¡°You¡¯ll see.¡± I pull her into her backyard. There¡¯s a row of bushes near the fence that separate our two houses. I know that between those bushes is a little clearing where she used to hide. Once, years ago, when I¡¯d bent down to scrub the tires while washing my car, I saw her there, watching me. That was the first time I suspected she had a crush on me. I watched her the entire time through the reflection of the car while I washed it. She never had a clue that I noticed. The bushes are overgrownpared to how they were back then. No one will be able to see us. Not even from a higher vantage point. ¡°Remember how you used to watch me wash my car from here?¡± I say, teasing her.N?velDrama.Org owns this. Chapter 20 Chapter 20 She blushes. ¡°If you saw me watching you, why didn¡¯t you ever say anything?¡± ¡°I didn¡¯t want to embarrass you.¡± I smile. ¡°And I kind of liked the attention.¡± We squeeze through the space between the bushes. The small clearing is just wide enough to fit our bodies. As soon as we¡¯re hidden, I kiss her. Her arms wrap around my neck, our tongues at war. I slip my hands beneath her dress, unable to restrain myself any longer. Her panty-d ass cheeks fit perfectly into my hands. But I want to feel her skin against mine so I slip my hands beneath the fabric and massage. Those beautiful breasts press up against me. The fabric of her dress is so thin I can feel her hard nipples beneath them. I can¡¯t take it anymore. I need her naked. In one quick motion, I¡¯m slipping the dress up over her head. I then slip her panties off. Her breasts are magnificent. So perky they defy gravity, small ares and bright pink nipples. I slip one into my mouth while I tease the other one with my fingers. Her moaning sounds drive me crazy. I fight back the animal inside of me that wants to spread her apart and pound its way inside of her. I have to keep reminding myself that up until yesterday she was still a virgin and her body might not be ready for that kind of ravishing yet. Instead, I take my time, making sure she feels good. I slip my fingers between her folds. ¡°Damn, you¡¯re so wet,¡± I say. ¡°That¡¯s because it likes you,¡± she says as if her pussy were a kitten I¡¯ve cuddled up with. ¡°I like it too. So does my cock.¡± When she giggles, her muscles flex against my fingers. I groan, knowing how fantastic that would feel against my dick. In due time, I remind myself. Those muscles will flex even stronger when I make her come, and to make here I need to not rush things. I find the ridges of her g-spot and start to massage with the tips of my fingers, hooking them, pushing them. Watching Remy¡¯s face as I do this, her eyes grow wide, mouth open, eyes zed over as she stares at the sky. Her wetness builds up inside, pooling around my fingers. I move them faster. The little whimpers she¡¯s making are turning into full cries. I lock my lips on to hers so she doesn¡¯t alert anyone who might be hanging around nearby. Thest thing I need is for Sam to be wandering around. It¡¯s very possible he¡¯s walking around the neighborhood looking for me. I break away from our kiss when her cries die down. ¡°Fuck you¡¯re tight,¡± I say when I try to enter a third finger but it won¡¯t quite fit in. ¡°Feels so good,¡± she says, breathless. Suddenly her body bes rigid and she starts to spasm. That¡¯s when I really start to pound my fingers into her. Again, my mouth mps onto hers when she starts to scream. She bes a puddle in my arms, her muscles spent and weakening from the orgasm. Iy her down on the sundress beneath her. When she finallyes down off her high, she looks at me, blinking as though I¡¯m just nowing into focus. ¡°Wee back,¡± I say, smiling down at her. She has leaves in her hair. I pick them out. She looks sleepy, her eyes hooded. After the confrontation she had with Sam, she¡¯s probably mentally drained. ¡°That was incredible,¡± she says. ¡°Why don¡¯t orgasms ever feel like that when I give them to myself?¡± I start to think about her alone in her room, in her bed, her fingers inside of her, frantically rubbing, trying to reach that brief moment of release. The look on her face when it finally happens. My dick is so hard it feels as though it might explode. Yet, I still just want to make her feel good. ¡°I¡¯m not done with you yet,¡± I say, patting her on the thigh. Belongs ? to N?velDrama.Org. ¡°You better not be,¡± she says with a sluggish smile. ¡°I want you on your hand and knees.¡± A look of nervousness briefly crosses her face. ¡°Oh, it¡¯s kind of bright out here and ¡­¡± Her cheeks flush. The redness goes down her neck and chest. ¡°I¡¯m embarrassed for you to see everything.¡± I¡¯m not used to women I meet being embarrassed about anything when ites to their bodies. Probably because most of them used it to get whatever they want. shing their bare asses was a bargaining chip. And it always worked. Remy isn¡¯t like that though. She¡¯s not the kind of girl to manipte a man into getting what she wants. ¡°It¡¯s okay,¡± I say,ying delicate kisses on her lips, nose, and chin. ¡°You don¡¯t have to be embarrassed in front of me ever.¡± I rub my hand across the soft skin of her t belly, imagining what it would look like as it grew with my child inside. ¡°I want to see every part of you, learn everything about you, know you inside out.¡± Chapter 21 Chapter 21 She sits up, kisses me deeply before turning over onto her hands and knees. My balls clinch when I see this stunning new view of her with her beautiful velvet round ass, and her little pussy glistening wet. ¡°You¡¯re perfect,¡± I tell her, not wanting her to get confused by my silence. I want her in my mouth. I want to taste her, so I dive right in. Lapping at her silky wet fold with my tongue, sucking her clit into my mouth. I lick my way from her clit to her asshole and back again, making sure every part of her gets enough attention. She tastes as sweet as fruit and smells just as good. Not too strong. Just a hint of her female musk to know she¡¯s turned on. When my balls start to ache to the point of being ufortable, I rise and line up behind her. Holding onto her hips, I ease my way in. Her tunnel is like a warm wet fist around my cock, so tight. It feels remarkable. The satisfied sound she makes is music to my ears. She¡¯s wet enough to where I slide right into her, and in this position, I¡¯m able to reach all the way down to her wall. She lets out a breath of surprise when I bottom out. I make sure not to press too hard, just easing in and out of her slowly at first. I close my eyes, trying so hard to concentrate on noting too soon, but this is going to be difficult. I¡¯ve never been a two pump chump. Not even when I was younger, but Remy turns me on so much it¡¯s hard not to. I find my rhythm and she starts to rock back and forth with me, like it¡¯s a dance we¡¯ve done a million times before. I squeeze her ass cheeks, pulling them apart. Jesus, this is one hell of a view. I move faster. Her moaning getting louder. This hunger inside of me takes over and I start drilling into her. ¡°Fuck, baby, you feel so good. I¡¯m going to fuck you until you¡¯re pregnant. Drill my seed right into your womb.¡± I take her by the shoulders and thrust harder. She bites her lip to keep from screaming and alerting her mom who¡¯s right inside the house. ¡°Yes,¡± she demands. ¡°I want it. Blow your load in my pussy. I want your baby.¡± Her words are enough to send me over the edge. I pump into her two more times, hitting her wall, my cum filling her hot canal. When I¡¯m done, she copses on the ground, and Iy up against her, spooning. There¡¯s a chill in the air, but after all of that, neither of us is cold. I wrap my arm around her waist, rubbing her belly, and kissing her shoulder. ¡°You know I care about you, right?¡± I say. She rolls over to face me. ¡°I was hoping you did. I don¡¯t want to be just a convenienty.¡± I brush my thumb over her cheek, mesmerized by that pretty face. ¡°Never. I ¡­ I think I¡¯ve fallen for you.¡± ¡°You finally caught up.¡± Her smile shows every one of her perfect white teeth. ¡°I fell for you long ago.¡± I reach up and scratch the back of my head, feeling like a kid asking a girl to be his girlfriend. ¡°So, um, does this make us a couple?¡± ¡°I think it does.¡± Relief rolls over me. I can finally call her mine. I begin kissing her, and press her naked body against mine. I never want to let her go. 5 Remy Two monthster Sam is still being an ass after all this time. I thought he¡¯d get used to Deacon¡¯s and my rtionship by now. He changed his work schedule so he and Deacon are on the same shift; that way he¡¯s home when Deacon is and we have no time to spend with each other in the house. If Deacon and I want to spend time together, we have to leave. That¡¯s not necessarily a bad thing, but it would be nice once in a while to sit on the couch with the man I love and his child whom I adore, and just watch TV without Sam¡¯s nagging voice in our ears. I want to fall asleep in Deacon¡¯s arms without Sam waking us up and telling me I can¡¯t stay the night. It¡¯s like constantly having a parent around. Belonging ? N?velDram/a.Org. I wake up early. I¡¯m not feeling so well. It had been a fitful night of sleep¡ªif you can even call it sleep. Mostly just a lot of tossing and turning. I have the chills and no matter how many nkets I wrap around myself, I can¡¯t get warm. The sun streams in through the space between my curtains, piercing my pupils. This headache won¡¯t go away and I always feel like I¡¯m going to puke, which, for some reason, makes me constantly yawn. It¡¯s getting really annoying. All night my stomach had been feeling queasy. I don¡¯t think it¡¯s a stomach bug because right after I throw up, I¡¯m hungry. Usually with a stomach bug, just the thought of food makes me want to hurl. Maybe it¡¯s food poisoning¡ªI have been eating some questionable thingstely. It¡¯s weird because my whole life I¡¯ve hated olives. Only crazy people without tongues would eat such vile things, and yet now, even though the smell of them is still gross, I can¡¯t seem to get enough of them. Chapter 22 Chapter 22 Scents are tricky too. Say, cake for example, which most people love the smell of, has be completely repulsive. So much so that I would rather spend my time in a Coache portable outhouse than step near a bakery. Normally my mom¡¯s strawberry shampoo is a pleasant smell, but now I have to hold my breath when I walk past her. It¡¯s like I suddenly have the nose of a bloodhound. The scent of bacon wafts up from the kitchen. The greasy smell instantly turns my stomach. Springing up off the mattress, I get out of bed and I trip over some clothes on the floor, knocking everything off my dresser in my rush to the bathroom. Luckily I catch myself before I fall, but I¡¯m not able to catch the perfume bottles before they break. Great. More new scents to make my head swim. I barely make it to the bathroom on time. ¡°You okay, Remy?¡± my mom calls from downstairs when she hears all the noise I¡¯m making. I throw up again and again. My stomach must be the size of a keg because it keepsing. I¡¯m choking, trying to catch my breath. It takes me a minute to reply. ¡°Yeah, I¡¯m fine,¡± I say, even though I feel the opposite of fine. This is what road kill would feel like if it could feel anything. That¡¯s me. Road kill. Not only that, but I look like shit, too. I can see my refection in an openpact mirror on the countertop. My skin is pasty, dark circles around my eyes that almost look green. I¡¯m leaning against the cool porcin, hugging the toilet, when my momes into the room to check on me. She puts her back against the door, arms crossing her chest. ¡°What?¡± I say, when she gives me that observant mom look. ¡°You¡¯re pregnant.¡± My stomach lurches and again I throw up. I spit into the toilet and groan. ¡°What? No,¡± I say, wiping my mouth with a wad of toilet paper.Belongs ? to N?velDrama.Org. How the hell am I so cold, and yet ufortably hot at the same time? In my head I¡¯m trying to remember myst period. It¡¯s difficult because I¡¯m not one of those girls who keeps track. I¡¯ve never needed to before now, so I haven¡¯t made a habit of it. Now that I think about it, I realize it¡¯s been a while since Ist bought feminine hygiene products. ¡°Oh my god,¡± I say. For some reason, even though I know it¡¯s physically possible, I thought it would take longer than that to get pregnant. It makes sense, though. Deacon and I fuck like crazy whenever we get the chance¡ªwhich isn¡¯t nearly enough in my opinion¡ªand he alwayses inside of me. Some of our best sex revolves around him telling me he¡¯s going to get me pregnant. It really turns him on, the thought of me carrying his child, and having a big round belly as proof of our lovemaking. ¡°Come on,¡± my mom says with a sigh.¡± ¡°Where are we going?¡± Right now I don¡¯t feel like going anywhere. I just want to crawl back in bed and hide under my sheets until this terrible nausea goes away. If it ever does. ¡°The drug store to get you a pregnancy test.¡± After changing out of my pajamas, we go downstairs. I have to keep my shirt over my nose to avoid the breakfast smells. We get into the car. Deacon and Sam are standing outside on their front porch, arguing about something. They nce at us as we drive by. Deacon waves. Sam res at me. ¡°I really don¡¯t like that Sam guy,¡± my mom says, waving back. ¡°No one does.¡± I want to turn in my seat and look back at Deacon. If he only knew where we were going. I could text him, I guess. But I don¡¯t want to mention pregnancy tests until I know for sure. The road is too bumpy. I¡¯m starting to think my mom is intentionally finding all the potholes. She turns the station to easy listening. It¡¯s like she¡¯s trying to torture me or something. Maybe she¡¯s pissed about this pregnancy thing. There¡¯s an awkward silence between us. It¡¯s as if I can hear the gears turning in her head. I want to say something too, but I don¡¯t know what. This is a tricky subject. She¡¯s always had these images in her head of all the grand things I would do with my life, even though all I ever really wanted for myself was to settle down and have a family. When she was my age she wanted to travel the world, live abroad. Study other cultures and see amazing things. She never got the opportunity because she met my dad and idently got pregnant. Her family was religious so terminating a pregnancy was out. Her mom threatened to disown her if she decided to give me up for adoption. I¡¯m d she didn¡¯t and I know she¡¯s d about that too now. But there¡¯s always been this void in her life, this longing to escape it. She wants things for me that she never got to experience in her own life. She can¡¯t seem to understand why I don¡¯t want those things for myself, too. Chapter 23 Chapter 23 I crack the window. It¡¯s far too stuffy in here with us breathing the same air. ¡°I hate this song,¡± she says and turns off the radio, leaving us in awkward silence. Her hand is draped over the steering wheel, her mouth a hard set. ¡°Who¡¯s the father?¡± she blurts out. I lean my head against the window, trying not to get sick. Thest thing I want to tell her is who the father is. It won¡¯t take her long to figure out seeing as I have no friends and the only ce I ever want to be is next door. ¡°Is it Deacon?¡± she finally asks. As much as I want to, it¡¯s toote to deny it. She¡¯ll find out eventually. I just wanted him to be the first to know. ? N?velDrama.Org - All rights reserved. I nod. ¡°Jesus, Remy. You were supposed to watch his kid. Not make a new one.¡± ¡°I know,¡± I say. ¡°I¡¯m sorry.¡± But I¡¯m not actually sorry. I knew what I was getting myself into when Deacon and I hadn¡¯t used protection, and he knew too. This wasn¡¯t an ident like when my mom got pregnant with me. I want this. So does Deacon. At least I hope he still does. It¡¯s a little toote to back out now. She continues, ¡°I was afraid your childhood crush woulde back to haunt me. I¡¯d hoped those feelings had vanished over time.¡± ¡°How did you know about my crush on Deacon?¡± I ask. ¡°You weren¡¯t very subtle, always going outside to watch him whenever he was around¡ªnot that you were any different than the other women in the neighborhood. We were all guilty of ogling him. Me included. It was a happy day for husbands when Deacon left town.¡± Ew. That¡¯s kind of gross. My mom crushing on the man who is now potentially the father of my child. I don¡¯t know how much more I can take of this. My stomach is in knots. Not only because of the morning sickness and my mom and Sam¡¯s judgment, but also because I need to tell Deacon. I just hope he meant what he said about filling me with his seed and watching my stomach grow. If he was just saying it in the heat of the moment, I¡¯ll be devastated. ¡°Are you mad?¡± I ask. I hate it when my mom is disappointed in me. ¡°No. I just don¡¯t want you to end up a single mom like me. It¡¯s difficult raising a child on your own and at such a young age.¡± ¡°Deacon is nothing like Dad. He¡¯ll help me raise this child.¡± Of that I¡¯m sure of. He¡¯s an amazing father. Bailey is his pride and joy¡ªoh my god, it just hit me; if I¡¯m pregnant, Bailey and this child are going to be siblings. The thought makes me unreasonably happy even though I know I shouldn¡¯t get my hopes up. There could be a hundred reasons for my pregnancy symptoms. Stress is one of them, and I¡¯ve definitely been going through a lot of thattely. ¡°How can you be so sure he¡¯ll help out?¡± my mom asks. ¡°He already has an infant to take care of.¡± I look down at my hands, braid my fingers together. ¡°Wait,¡± she says. ¡°Did you guys know this might happen? Were you not careful on purpose?¡± The hurt in her voice leaves me feeling horribly guilty. ¡°I¡¯m an adult, Mom. Whatever Deacon and I decide is no one¡¯s business but our own.¡± She lets out a long sigh. ¡°I know. I¡¯m sorry. I don¡¯t mean to give you a hard time. I just want to know you and your baby will be taken care of.¡± ¡°We will be, Mom. Deacon is a great guy. You¡¯ll love him once you get to know him better.¡± ¡°I trust you. It just might take little while to trust him.¡± We get to the drug store. I have a sudden craving and grab a handful of sour candy. She buys three different tests to be sure the results are reliable. I think she¡¯s more nervous about this than I am. There¡¯s more silence during the drive back. Once we¡¯re home, she hands me the tests and I go into the bathroom. I take them all at once and wait. After five minutes the results are ready, but I¡¯m afraid to look. I want this with Deacon. I really do, but I don¡¯t want my mom to be pissed at me either. I just want everyone to be as happy as I am. Taking a deep breath, I pick up all three sticks and look at them at the same time. My muscles are tensed up, neck and shoulders achy. I stare down at the sticks in disbelief. Two pink lines on one, a plus sign on the second, and a boldly worded ¡®Pregnant¡¯ on the third. There¡¯s no doubt now. I¡¯m pregnant. I can hardly breathe. It feels like someone is sitting on my chest. I¡¯m terrified and yet I¡¯ve never wanted anything more in my life. Suddenly I¡¯m wondering what a child made by me and Deacon will look like. Beautiful, I imagine. Like Deacon. Like Bailey. Blond hair, green eyes. A dimple in his or her chin like me maybe, or high cheekbones like their father. Chapter 24 Chapter 24 Will it be a boy or a girl? What will we name him or her? All these thoughts race through my head at once until I feel like I might pass out. Now to tell my mom ¡­ She¡¯s waiting outside the bathroom door, pacing. She picks at her eyebrows, something she has always done when she¡¯s nervous. She barely has any left and has to draw them on. She sees me and her eyes open wide. ¡°Well?¡± she says. I hold up the sticks and burst into happy tears. ¡°I¡¯m going to have a baby!¡± She starts to cry too. ¡°Oh my god,¡± she says. But instead of cussing or saying something that might break my heart, she smiles and says. ¡°I¡¯m going to be a grandma.¡± We hug, both of us melting into tears. ¡°What do you think Deacon¡¯s going to say?¡± she says when we come apart. I wipe away the mascara rolling down my cheeks. ¡°He¡¯s going to be really happy, Mom. I promise. You have nothing to worry about.¡± She smiles, her eyes red and watering. ¡°I trust you. I know you¡¯re a smart girl and wouldn¡¯t rush into anything unless you were absolutely sure you knew what you were doing.¡± ¡°Thanks Mom,¡± I say and hug her again. Now to tell Deacon. I¡¯m twisting my hands. They¡¯re sweating. I feel like I¡¯m going to pass out. Deacon will be happy. I know that. But I¡¯m still afraid. This will drive a wedge so far between him and Sam that I don¡¯t know if that rtionship will ever recover. I don¡¯t want to be the one responsible for ruining a family. But he has to know. And soon. This isn¡¯t something I can keep from him. I go next door and ring the bell. Sam answers. He rolls his eyes when he sees me, but stands aside to let me in. There are boxes stacked up all over the living room. Bailey is in her ypen next to the couch. ¡°What¡¯s going on?¡± I ask, a tinge of fear ringing through me. Someone has obviously packed their belongings to move and I doubt it¡¯s Sam. Deacones down the stairs. He looks mad at first until he sees me. His face rxes into a gentle smile. ¡°What are you doing here?¡± he asks in a way that lets me knows he¡¯s happy for the surprise. ¡°I need to talk to you.¡± I wave my hands around, pointing at all the boxes. ¡°What is all this?¡± ¡°I found a ce of my own,¡± he says. I didn¡¯t even know he was looking. If he has a ce of his own that means we can finally spend as much time together as we want, make as much noise as we want while having sex. Hell, we can walk around naked if we feel like it. There won¡¯t be anyone around to judge us or tell us what we can and can¡¯t do. ¡°This is all your fault,¡± Sam says, ring at me. ¡°How is this my fault? I don¡¯t even know what¡¯s going on,¡± I say. ¡°Sam is just being a dick,¡± Deacon says, tossing a gym bag on top of the pile of suitcases stacked up by the door. ¡°We didn¡¯t start fighting until she came into the picture,¡± Sam says. Deacon snaps back, ¡°We wouldn¡¯t have started fighting had you minded your own business. What I do with my life has nothing to do with you. You¡¯re a control freak. You get off on it.¡± N?velDrama.Org owns this. ¡°No. I care about what happens to my brother.¡± Deacon shakes his head. ¡°You care about getting your way. If you cared what was best for me, you¡¯d see that I was happy for the first time in a long time and Remy is what¡¯s best for me.¡± ¡°You¡¯re wrong about me, Sam,¡± I say, unable to stay quiet any longer. ¡°I love Deacon. I would never do anything to hurt him or our kids.¡± They both turn to look at me, their brows furrowed simrly. It¡¯s the only time I¡¯ve ever seen any kind of family resemnce between the two of them. ¡°Kids?¡± Deacon says. ¡°As in more than one?¡± I cradle my belly protectively when I see the angry look on Sam¡¯s face. ¡°I found out this morning,¡± I say. ¡°You¡¯re sure?¡± Deacon replies. Sam opens his big mouth and says, ¡°See, I told you she was trouble. She went and got herself knocked up so you¡¯re forced to stay together. You¡¯re trapped now, man.¡± He gets this smug look on his face like he¡¯s waiting for his brother lose his shit, but instead, Deacon¡¯s smile stretches across his face and he scoops me into a hug, hisughter filling the house. Bailey responds with a happy squeal. ¡°We¡¯re going to have a baby?¡± he says. Tears fill his eyes. Seeing his tears brings tears of my own. I nod my head, unable to get words around the emotion in my voice. He turns to Sam. The pissed off, soured Deacon has been reced by someone jovial. Someone who looks about to explode with happiness. ¡°You better behave at our wedding, brother,¡± Deacon says. Chapter 25 Chapter 25 ¡°Wedding?¡± Sam says. Wedding? I think. He hasn¡¯t even officially proposed yet, but it¡¯s exciting none the less. ¡°Can you take Bailey while I finish loading my bags into the truck?¡± Deacon says to me. ¡°Of course.¡± Bailey holds her arms up when she sees me walking toward her. I lift her up and settle her on my hip. When Deacon leaves, I¡¯m stuck alone with Sam. The room fills with an awkward silence so thick you could cut it with a knife. I can¡¯t take it anymore. ¡°I wish you would give me a chance before you startparing me to Deacon¡¯s ex. That¡¯s not fair. I really want my child to know his or her uncle. I want us to be a happy family.¡± He stares at me so long it¡¯s like his face has frozen that way. Just as I¡¯m about to ask if someone had turned the lights off in his head, he looks down at the carpet. ¡°You mean that? Because Karen was always trying to get between me and my brother right from the beginning. When I bought this house from Deacon, she tried getting him to sell it to me for far more than they paid for it. She was a snake. I¡¯ve always wanted a rtionship with my brother. When he moved in with me, I thought that¡¯s what I was going to have with him. Until now ¡­¡± ¡°I would never try to get between brothers. I¡¯m an only child. I¡¯ve always wanted siblings. Karen was a horrible person, but I¡¯m not. I would love to have a brother inw.¡± He sighs. ¡°I want that too.¡± Deacones back in the house. ¡°You ready?¡± he asks me. ¡°One second,¡± Sam says. ¡°No, I¡¯m not going to sit here and listen to you berate the mother of my¡ª¡± Instead of letting Deacon finish what he was about to say, Sam walks up to Deacon and gives him a hug. When Sam steps back, Deacon looks as though Sam had struck him, arms out, mouth hanging open. ¡°What ¡­¡± ¡°I¡¯m happy for you,¡± Sam says. He looks at me. ¡°For both of you. If you need help moving into your new ce, let me know.¡± Deacon¡¯s brow furrows, again looking simr to Sam. ¡°Um, yeah, actually I could use the help.¡± ¡°I¡¯ll help too,¡± I say. ¡°No way,¡± Sam says. ¡°You¡¯re not lifting a finger. Not while you¡¯re growing my niece or nephew inside of you.¡± Deacon looks at me in shock and shakes his head. ¡°Thanks, Brother,¡± he says. When we¡¯re in the truck, Deacon shakes his head. ¡°Are you some kind of sorceress or something?¡± he asks. ¡°What do you mean?¡± ¡°Or maybe a surgeon.¡± Iugh. ¡°What on earth are you talking about?¡± He pulls into a nice older neighborhood lined with weeping willows. It¡¯s the kind of neighborhood one would feel safe raising a family in. Lots of sidewalks for children to run and y. To stroll along with a couple of babies. There¡¯s a small park on the corner and bicycle trail. I¡¯ve always dreamed of living in a neighborhood like this. ¡°How did you get that stick out of Sam¡¯s ass when I¡¯ve been trying my whole life?¡± Deacon says. I smile. ¡°Sam is a good guy. He just wants a rtionship with his brother and I told him I¡¯m going to make sure he gets it.¡± ¡°You really are the best.¡± Belonging ? N?velDram/a.Org. He pulls the truck into the driveway of arge house painted light gray with darker gray trim and a red door. ¡°Wow, is this it?¡± I say, excited. It¡¯s a beautiful home with a manicuredwn, a huge flower garden, a towering oak with a tire swing out front and fruit trees on the side next to the driveway. I can picture us sitting on the porch with iced tea in the summer, watching Bailey y in the yard while I nurse our newborn. This is my dream. ¡°This is it. I think you¡¯re going to love it,¡± Deacon says. ¡°It¡¯s beautiful,¡± I say, ¡°but it doesn¡¯t matter what I think. It¡¯s your house.¡± He gives me a strange look. ¡°It¡¯s your house too. You¡¯re moving in with me.¡± I don¡¯t know why this shocks me. Of course we¡¯ll live together, I just didn¡¯t know he meant us to live together so soon. Leaving my mom alone in that big house makes me sad, but at the same time I¡¯m ready to start my own family, have my own house, and make my own memories. I think the reason she never had the men that she dated over to the house was because she was afraid of them intruding on our little family. But now that I¡¯m not there she can start having some fun. She won¡¯t have to worry about me anymore. Maybe this is best for the both of us in the end. ¡°I love it,¡± I say. He hands me a key with a key ring that says ¡®hers.¡¯ He lifts up his own key ring that says ¡®his.¡¯ I throw myself into his arms and squeeze the air out of him. Chapter 26 Chapter 26 This is our home. Our beautiful, perfect home. It takes a couple weeks before we¡¯repletely settled in the new house. I wanted to give my mom some time to adjust before just shipping out. Now that she¡¯s used to the idea of me being gone, and encourages it, I¡¯m excited to start staying with Deacon and Bailey. Over thest week we¡¯d been painting the nursery. We went with a mint for a neutral color since we don¡¯t know yet if our new baby will be a boy or girl. We haven¡¯t decided if we want to know the sex at all until the delivery. I always thought it was kind of fun when people didn¡¯t know. The biggest surprise of one¡¯s life. Except I don¡¯t know how long I will hold out. I already want to go shopping for little outfits and there aren¡¯t enough cute baby stuff in neutral colors for me to get excited about. It¡¯s my first night sleeping in the new house. After all the work and decorating we¡¯ve done, this feels like my reward. My mom volunteered to keep Bailey overnight so Deacon and I could have some much needed alone time together. Once this babyes, and since I¡¯ll be breastfeeding, it¡¯ll be impossible to sneak in time for just us. After dropping Bailey off, we go inside the house. It still smells like fresh paint. ? N?velDrama.Org - All rights reserved. ¡°It¡¯s so quiet in here,¡± Deacon says. He walks up to me, rubs my belly. It¡¯s sort of a new obsession with him, always touching it, rubbing it like a crystal ball that might reveal his future if he looks hard enough. His hands slip up and over my sensitive breasts. ¡°Should we fill it with your screams of pleasure?¡± he says. I close my eyes and lean back against him, marveling in the feel of his touch. ¡°I thought you¡¯d never ask.¡± Everything about my body is sensitive right now. Hyper-aware of Deacon¡¯s touch. In fact, just the other day, he gave me an orgasm just by breathing on my clit. It was incredible. I¡¯ve heard that can happen during pregnancy, and I also heard there might be a stretch of time when I won¡¯t feel like being touched at all. So right now, while my body feels as though it¡¯s tripping on Ecstasy, I¡¯m going to enjoy it while I can. I lift my arms for him to slip off my dress. It¡¯s gotten cooler out so I¡¯m wearing boots. Those are difficult to unzip so I take them off myself while he strips out of his clothes. We¡¯re both far too turned on to worry about the ceremony of the slow striptease. We just want to see each other naked. He¡¯s already fully erect. There hasn¡¯t been a time yet where he hasn¡¯t been after talk of sex. I¡¯ve always heard older men¡ªeven men in their thirties¡ªneed a little encouragement down there from time to time, but not Deacon. He¡¯s a stallion and always ready to go. I kneel down on the floor before him, taking his huge cock in my hand and suck the head into my mouth. I love the taste of his pree. I was afraid that was one of the things that would change when everything else about my body changed, but not at all. If anything, it tastes better. Sometimes I even crave the taste of cum, and I suck him off every chance I get. His cock barely fits in my mouth. Good thing I have a big mouth and know how to breathe through my nose while he stuffs it in. ¡°Look at me, baby,¡± he says, as he holds the sides of my head, spearing himself into my stretched throat. He likes me to look him in the eyes while he fucks my mouth. Our eyes lock, tears streaming down my cheeks as my mouth spreads to amodate his mass. The faster he thrusts, the more I tear up. Drool spills from the corners of my mouth. With him so far down my throat, it¡¯s impossible to use those muscles to swallow. He pulls out suddenly and I wipe my wet face with the back of my hand. He then lifts me up by my armpits and hauls me to my feet. ¡°On your hands and knees,¡± he says. He¡¯s so demanding when he¡¯s turned on, the opposite way he acts toward me in our regr life. I love how he takes charge, flexing authority. I never question him anymore when he demands something of me during sex because I¡¯ve grown to realize I enjoy it all. Some things more than others, but there hasn¡¯t been a single thing he¡¯s done that hasn¡¯t given me the best orgasms of my life. Once I¡¯m on all fours, he stands behind me, lifting my backside into the air until I¡¯m standing on my hands in a vertical 69 position. I can¡¯t reach his cock from this angle with my mouth, but he has perfect ess to my pussy. My legs are up in the air, spread apart. I¡¯m flexible and can do the splits, so I¡¯m able to spread them far. He makes the sexiest sounds when he¡¯s turned on. Deep, masculine sounds of approval when he sees my open pussy that only turn me on more. He holds my waist while he buries his face in my wet cunt, not leaving any of my skin unexplored. Chapter 27 Chapter 27 Blood rushes to my head as he digs into my wet depths with his tongue, drinking from my well. When he sucks on my clit, it¡¯s not just sucking, but abination of lipping, sucking, and biting. It¡¯s some sort of secret recipe of lip action that, if he were to share it with the rest of mankind, could probably change the world into a better ce. As much as I would like to stay like his forever, my arms get weak and start to buckle. He notices and lets go so I¡¯m able to do a sort-of cartwheel back into a standing position. As the blood leaves my head, I¡¯m dizzy and feeling a little euphoric. He lifts me into his arms, doing all the work when he sees me start to sway. I love that he knows my body so well. Owned by N?velDrama.Org. I wrap my legs around his waist like in my adolescent fantasies of him carrying me away, and we go into the bedroom. Heys me down on the bed and turns me onto my side. He enters me from an angle. The closet doors of our room are mirrored so I¡¯m able to see every bit of what¡¯s happening. If it were up to him, we would¡¯ve had mirrors on the ceiling as well. Can¡¯t say I would be terribly opposed to that idea, but you know, with having kids in the house and familying over on a regr basis, it probably wouldn¡¯t have been a good idea. Sam would¡¯ve had a heart attack if he ever witnessed something like that. He¡¯s such prude. I have a feeling missionary is the only trick up his sleeve in the bedroom. At least if anyone decides toe over and goes into our room, the closet doors can be exined away with vanity. The hope chest of sex toys we¡¯ve started to acquire would probably need more of an exnation had anyone peeked inside. We keep a padlock on it just in case. Watching Deacon drill into my pussy from the mirror is like watching a porno. It¡¯s a side of myself I¡¯m not used to seeing. Not to brag or anything, but I really do have a nice-looking pussy. With his perfect dick it¡¯s a lovely sight, the way he stretches me open. And it¡¯s a major turn on watching it. At first I didn¡¯t like reverse cowgirl all that much because I couldn¡¯t look at Deacon¡¯s face, but now that we have the mirrors, I see it all. It¡¯s when I really started to notice just howrge Deacon¡¯s cock actually was. Whenever he¡¯s all the way inside of me, and then I slowly lift up, it seems like his dick never ends. While he pounds me from the side, I lift my leg for a better view. Deacon smiles and talks into my ear, his voice choppy and breathless with his efforts. ¡°You like looking at that sexy pussy, don¡¯t you,¡± he says. ¡°I like watching you fuck it.¡± He lets out a long desire-filled groan. ¡°I love it when you talk dirty in that cute little voice of yours.¡± I giggle and twist enough so that I can kiss him. He pulls out of me and I feel suddenly empty inside. He rolls over, onto his back. ¡°Ride me,¡± he says. I climb on top of him and sink down, feeling that pressure of the head of his dick pressed tight against my cervix. Then I start to bounce. I¡¯m riding him. Jackhammering. The p of our skin as it connects, my moaning, his grunting, the heady scent of our lovemaking, fills the room and makes my head swim with pleasure. God, pregnancy sex is amazing. All these hormones raging through me, these new sensations I¡¯ve never felt before. It¡¯s like discovering sex for the first time all over again. I¡¯m almost there. So close. I arch my spine, throwing my head back. Deacon grabs my hips, mming into me with wonderful force. Almost. Oh god. Oh, yes. So close. I can feel the orgasm racing toward me. Just another second and ¡­ Someone knocks on the front door and my concentration teeters, the orgasm taking a step back. I stop moving to listen. ¡°No, keep going,¡± Deacon says, still grinding his hips into me. ¡°They¡¯lle backter.¡± He¡¯s right. I continue to move, rotating my pelvis, trying again to find that magic spot. We find our rhythm again. Deacon reaches up, taking my swollen breasts in his hands and flicking my sensitive nipples the way I like. ¡°Your cock is so big, it fills me up,¡± I say. I love that feeling. Stuffed to my limit. Whole. Whenever I talk dirty to him, it gets him wound up every time. He moves faster. The knockinges again. Several times. Then the knocking shifts into pounding. I stop moving again. Deacon makes a groan of disappointment. ¡°What if it¡¯s about Bailey,¡± I say. ¡°Your mom would¡¯ve called first,¡± Deacon says. That¡¯s true. My phone is on the nightstand, fully charged. I lean over to grab it. No missed calls or texts. Whoever is pounding on the door refuses to let up. At first I think maybe it¡¯s a delivery, or a sales person, but they would¡¯ve left by now. It¡¯s getting really annoying. Chapter 28 Chapter 28 ¡°Maybe the neighborhood is on fire and it¡¯s an evacuation,¡± I say. Every bad thing imaginable crosses my mind and there¡¯s no way I can ignore it any longer. ¡°It¡¯s probably just Saming to check and see if our curtains match the couch,¡± Deacon teases. ¡°Don¡¯t ever mention your brother when we¡¯re having sex,¡± I say. ¡°I didn¡¯t think there was anything you could possibly do to turn me off, but you might¡¯ve just found the one thing.¡± Heughs and smacks me on the butt. Owned by N?velDrama.Org. ¡°Please, I need to go check,¡± I say. ¡°I can¡¯t focus on us until I do.¡± Deacon sighs. ¡°All right. I¡¯ll go check it out.¡± ¡°No,¡± I say, climbing off of him and wrapping my robe around me. ¡°You stay and keep that thing hard for when Ie back.¡± He smiles at me and takes hold of his massive cock, stroking it. I wink at him and smile. ¡°Good boy.¡± I wrap my robe tight around me and tie the belt in a knot. I jog into the living room. When I open the door, I¡¯m not sure what to expect, but it definitely not the person standing in front of me. The woman doesn¡¯t say anything to me at first, just scrutinizes me, looking up and down from my mussed up hair to my bare feet. She¡¯s a bit older than me. In her thirties. Closer to Deacon¡¯s age. She has bleached hair with long dark roots. Not the kind that¡¯s fashionable right now, but the kind a woman gets when she neglects to keep her salon appointments. She wears an oversized hooded sweatshirt and jeans with boots, and too much makeup. Her thin lips and the harsh set of her mouth make her look severe. ¡°Can I help you?¡± I ask. ¡°Where¡¯s Deacon?¡± she says bluntly. I hear footsteps behind me. I turn. Deacon is standing there with only a pair of sweatpants on. ¡°Who is it?¡± he asks. I open the door wider for him to see. His mouth falls open in surprise, then closes, his eyebrows coming together in an angry look. ¡°What the hell are you doing here, Karen?¡± Karen? This woman is his ex-wife? I remember her being prettier than she is now. I was so jealous when she came into the picture. She¡¯s not ugly, really, just ¡­ harsh. Like someone who is scraping through life by the skin of her teeth. Deacon says she¡¯s a drunk and a party girl. I wonder if that includes doing drugs as well, because that¡¯s the vibe I¡¯m getting with her. 6 Deacon I haven¡¯t seen my ex since she walked out on me and our child nearly six months ago. Not a phone call. Not a text. One night she drained both our bank ounts, gathered all of her possessions¡ªand some of mine¡ªand disappeared with a note that simply said, ¡°I can¡¯t do this anymore¡±. Now here she is. At my new house where I¡¯m building a new life. One that was supposed to be Karen-free. She looks much older than thest time I saw her. Her skin is thin as parchment, hair dry like straw. She looks rode hard and put away wet, as people say. A typical bar fly. All that partying has caught up with her. Not that she was ever stunning to begin with. It wasn¡¯t her looks that attracted me to her, it was her confidence. The way she walked right up to me and said, ¡°You¡¯re taking me on a date.¡± I almost said no that day. I should have. But I hadn¡¯t been on a date in a long time and I thought, what the hell. I¡¯d never been attracted to women so outspoken and so confident before. I thought it would be a nice change from the girls I usually dated. I quickly learned that just because something is different doesn¡¯t mean it¡¯s better. But I had my blinders on. Honestly, I don¡¯t know what I was thinking. Looking at her now, I can¡¯t remember a single thing that attracted me to her at all. ¡°How the fuck did you find me?¡± I demand. Remy starts to back away from the door. She didn¡¯t sign up for this. I don¡¯t me her for not wanting to be part of my drama. Karen isn¡¯t the type of women someone as sweet and innocent as Remy would want to confront¡ªand she shouldn¡¯t have to. Karen is the type who would smile at her face and as soon as she dropped her guard, yank her back by the hair. I¡¯ve actually seen her do that once before when she was drunk at a club. She did it to one of the bottle girls who she thought looked at me wrong. It got us kicked out and permanently banned from the club. She was always crazy-jealous. It wasn¡¯t like she actually cared about me. But she sure as hell wasn¡¯t going to allow anyone else to flirt. ¡°Sam gave me the address,¡± Karen says. Remy lookspletely shocked. She probably thinks Sam betrayed her after they were bing so close. But I know that¡¯s not the case. Chapter 29 Chapter 29 ¡°Bullshit. Sam would never do that,¡± I say. If there was one person I know Sam hates more than anyone else, it¡¯s Karen. She was horrible to him from day one. She smiles smugly. ¡°I pretended I was an insurance provider on the phone and he spilled all your personal info me. Someone should tell that guy he has a big mouth.¡± Believe me, I have. He never learns. I n to give him an earful about it next time we talk. It makes perfect sense. Karen and her schemes. Some things never change. I would really love to m the door in her face right now and go back to making love to my beautiful girlfriend who doesn¡¯t deserve to be put through any of this. I can tell Remy doesn¡¯t want to stay, but she does because she wants to be here for me. I don¡¯t want to put her through this anymore. ¡°Babe, could you make sure I blew out that candle in the room?¡± I say to her. She lets out a long sigh of relief and gives me a sympathetic smile. ¡°Sure.¡± When she¡¯s gone, I turn back to Karen who watches Remy walk away. ¡°Jesus, Deacon, what is she, twelve?¡± ¡°She¡¯s eighteen and far more mature than you ever were,¡± I snap. ¡°Why are you here?¡± I never used to stand up to her. She¡¯s not used to being talked to like this. That self-righteous sneer she gives me says it all. She thinks she cane back here and boss me around like she used to. Well, fuck that. Not going to happen. Being with Remy has shown me how I deserve to be treated. The look on her face is a mixture between shock and rage. ¡°I¡¯m here to get my daughter.¡± She spits the words out like they¡¯re poison on her tongue. They hit me like a punch in the gut. ¡°No,¡± Remy says. I look behind me where she¡¯s standing at the entrance of the hall. She must¡¯ve been eavesdropping. She looks terrified. ¡°You can¡¯te back here after being gone for months and just take her. You have no right.¡± Her voice is high-pitched, frightened. She¡¯s practically in tears. She and Bailey had formed an instant bond. Remy¡¯s the only mother Bailey has ever truly known. Belonging ? N?velDram/a.Org. ¡°I have every right. I¡¯m her mother,¡± Karen says, her lip curling into a vaudevillian smile. ¡°There¡¯s no way in hell I¡¯m letting you anywhere near my daughter. No. Fucking. Way,¡± I tell her. Her smile is hideous. Evil. She wants to rip my new family apart. Destroy everything I¡¯ve built. Everything I will fight to death for. I¡¯ve never raised my hand to a woman. Never even entertained the idea. But seeing that look on her face and knowing she ns to take my daughter from me ¡­ ¡°You¡¯ll have to take me to court for custody,¡± I say. ¡°No judge will ever hand Bailey over to you. You¡¯re a drunk and have no stability. You¡¯re practically a stranger to her.¡± ¡°We¡¯ll see about that. I¡¯m her mother. Children belong with their mothers and any judge will see that. I have a full time job and an apartment of my own. There¡¯s nothing you can do to stop me.¡± I can¡¯t believe she¡¯s doing this. She doesn¡¯t want to be a mother. I know her better than that. So what¡¯s her angle? With the way she keeps looking at Remy, I think I can guess. She probably blew through all the guys she¡¯s been dating¡ªliterally and figuratively¡ªand once they saw through her shit, most likely, they dumped her. So, as usual, shees running back to me. This has happened plenty of times in the past. Like a fool, I always took her back because of my dreams of having the perfect family. Things would be good between us for a while. She would do wifely things: make dinners, doundry, go shopping. But then she¡¯d always get that itch to go party. One night of going out with the girls led to another night, and another, until it was every night. Then she wouldn¡¯te home at all. Now that she knows I¡¯ve moved on, she wants to hurt me. The only way to do that is to go after Bailey. She¡¯s vindictive enough to do it too. I believe that. She¡¯ll fight for custody just to spite me. There¡¯s no way I¡¯m giving my daughter up without a fight. She shrugs. ¡°I guess I¡¯ll see you in court,¡± she says and walks away. I m the door, feeling sick to my stomach. Remy rushes over and wraps her arms around me. ¡°Please tell me that didn¡¯t just happen. It¡¯s just a horrible nightmare and we¡¯ll both wake up from it any minute now.¡± I rub her back and hold her tight. ¡°I wish I could tell you that¡¯s the case, but it¡¯s not.¡± ¡°Bailey is like a daughter to me. I love her so much. That woman will ruin her life,¡± Remy says. I sigh. ¡°I know. But Karen¡¯s right. She¡¯s Bailey¡¯s mom. That seems to be important to judges, even though she¡¯s like a toxic mold.¡± Chapter 30 Chapter 30 ¡°But that woman has been MIA for months. We have a home. Bailey has her own room and her things are here. She would be so scared going and living with a stranger.¡± The clenching in my stomach gets worse imagining how scared my child would be with a woman she hardly knows. Enough time has passed that I don¡¯t think Bailey would even recognize her own mother. ¡°I know, but Karen and I are both single parents. Everyone always sides with the mother.¡± ¡°Unless you can provide you have a more stable home,¡± Remy says eagerly. ¡°Two parents in a loving home is better than one, right?¡± ¡°What are you saying?¡± ¡°Marry me,¡± she says. Surprise cuts my words off. I don¡¯t know what to say other than, ¡°Marry you?¡± ¡°Yes, marry me. We can get married and that way when you go to court, a judge will see that Bailey has two loving and devoted parents, a dependable ie, and a sibling on the way. Karen might have a job and apartment, but she doesn¡¯t have a home.¡± ¡°Remy, I love you. You are the best thing that¡¯s ever happened to me, and I want to marry you more than anything, but I don¡¯t want it to be because you feel you have to in order to appease a judge,¡± I tell her. ¡°That¡¯s not it at all. I love you too. I love Bailey. You and I are going to have a child. There¡¯s nothing holding us back from getting married.¡± The fear I¡¯d been harboring starts to fade. ¡°Hold that thought.¡± ¡°What? Why?¡± she says. ¡°You¡¯ll see.¡± I go into the bedroom and into the closet where I find an old suit jacket that doesn¡¯t fit me anymore in the back of the closet. In the pocket is where I hid the ring I bought for Remy. I¡¯ve had it for a month now. I wanted to n some huge borate proposal, get all our friends and family to pull it off, but I guess it¡¯s toote for that now. I grab the ring and hide it behind my back. Then I stand in front of her. I kiss her lips then get down on one knee. I pull out the box from behind my back. Remy puts her hands to her mouth and I open the velvet box, revealing the princess cut solitaire inside. ¡°Remy, I love you with all my heart. You¡¯re my soul mate and I want to spend the rest of my life with you and our children. I want to build a life and a home with you and grow old together. Will you marry me?¡± She¡¯sughing and crying at the same time. Holding her hand out, I slip the ring on her finger. It fits perfectly as I knew it would. I¡¯d taken her mom with me to go shopping for it. We¡¯d taken Remy¡¯s high school graduation ring with us to make sure it was the right size. ¡°Of course I¡¯ll marry you,¡± she says and wraps her arms around my neck. I know she¡¯s looking at it over my shoulder, because she keeps saying, ¡°It¡¯s so beautiful.¡± I pull back and kiss her lips. The kiss deepens. Her hands slip beneath the waist of my sweatpants, finding my ass. She pulls away for a brief moment and says, ¡°We have some unfinished business to attend to.¡± Then her lips crush against mine once more. I lift her into my arms and carry her back to the bed. The robe she¡¯s wearing falls open as sheys back on the bed, spreading her legs for me. Her beautiful pussy is still a bit red with friction from the earlier pounding I¡¯d given her that was so rudely interrupted. I kneel in front of her and lick her worked flesh with my tongue to soothe it. She coos as I gentlyp at her folds. It doesn¡¯t take long for her to get wet. She¡¯s easily turned on. Belonging ? N?velDram/a.Org. ¡°I need you inside of me,¡± she demands. I give her clit a kiss and move my way up until I reach her belly which is showing the slightest pooch. I wouldn¡¯t call it a baby bump. Not yet. It¡¯s still just as t as ever, just a little swollen-lookingpared to usual. I caress the smooth skin. My child is in there. We made that. Us, together. Our love did that. I continue to kiss my way up her body until I¡¯ve reached her lips. Right now it¡¯s not about fucking and getting each other off¡ªeven though that¡¯s definitely about to happen. But instead, it¡¯s about making love to her. Being with her. Being inside of her. Showing her, physically, how much I love her. She gasps as I enter her. She feels swollen and tight, and slippery wet. Her sheath grips my cock in the best possible way. I thrust my hips, moving in and out of her. She whimpers, begs me not to stop. I don¡¯t. I move faster, harder. Her pussy starts to clench around me. Grabbing me. Holding me until it takes some serious effort to keep moving. Her muscles milk my cock until I can¡¯t take it any longer. With a growl, I release my load inside the most perfect woman I¡¯ve ever seen. The love of my life. Chapter 31 Chapter 31 7 Remy Our wedding is a weekter. I don¡¯t know how she did it, but my mom managed to pull it all together in that short amount of time. We have it at Sam¡¯s house in his big backyard, the fall leaves the color of fire, falling down around Deacon and me as we stand with the preacher beneath an archway of orange roses. It¡¯s a fall country theme, with bouquets of dried flowers and sugar maple leaves. Guests sit on hay bales. I wear a knee-length white dress with a long veil and cowgirl boots. Mason jars with candles hang from tree branches and there are icicle lights everywhere. It¡¯s quaint and beautiful and absolutely perfect. The entire neighborhood showed up. There¡¯s a tent in back and a dance floor with a live acoustic band. As the sun goes down, it starts to get chilly, so propane heaters are brought out and the fire pit is stacked and lit. The service itself was wonderful. Deacon and I held Bailey in our arms during it. I vowed not only to be a devoted wife, but a mother to Bailey as well. It¡¯s still hard to believe I¡¯m Deacon¡¯s wife. Just a couple months ago I was thinking about what I was going to do with my life now that high school was over. There were no real ns, but I¡¯d been tossing the idea of traveling to Europe around in my head because that¡¯s what my mom had wanted me to do at the time. I never really wanted that, but I wanted to make her happy. Maybe we will still have the chance to do that. It¡¯s where Deacon wants to take me for our honeymoon. Somehow I think my mom got in his ear because he once told me he was afraid of flying. I¡¯m married. I¡¯m a married woman. That¡¯s crazy. Especially because the man I¡¯m with is the man of my dreams, and I¡¯m having his baby. Life would be perfect right now if I didn¡¯t have Karen haunting my thoughts. I still can¡¯t get that smug look of hers out of my head. The threats she made to Deacon about taking Bailey. How does she live with herself? How does a woman get married and have a child and then just abandon her family, only to return monthster and threaten them? I have a feeling it¡¯s because of me. I think if she hadn¡¯t seen me in my robe¡ªclearly nothing underneath¡ªand Deacon in his sweatpants and no shirt, things would¡¯ve happened much differently. I may be young, but I know jealousy when I see it. She must¡¯ve thought Deacon had sat around pining for her while she went off to party. ¡°Hey.¡± My thoughts are interrupted when Deacones up to me. He¡¯d been on the dance floor swing dancing with my mom while I sat down to rest my feet. My ankles are swollen. I¡¯m showing more and more signs of being pregnant now even though my belly still hasn¡¯t grown enough to where it¡¯s noticeable. It¡¯s only obvious when I¡¯m naked. My thoughts had gotten away with me. I¡¯m angry that I was thinking about Karen on a night that should be just about me and Deacon. ¡°Everything okay?¡± he asks. I stand up and hug him. ¡°Everything is perfect.¡± A slow songes on. Guests flock to the floor with their partners. I put my head on Deacon¡¯s shoulder and we start to dance. ¡°Something¡¯s on your mind,¡± he says. ¡°Just nervous about the court date.¡± We¡¯d gotten a court summons earlier this week. I thought Karen had been bluffing, but it seems she was angrier than I thought. ¡°Me too,¡± Deacon says, ¡°but this is our special night, and I¡¯m not going to let that bitch ruin it for us.¡± I smile up at him. ¡°Me neither.¡±? N?velDrama.Org - All rights reserved. We spend the rest of the night dancing with our friends and family. It¡¯s a st. I never want it to be over. By the time everyone starts to leave, my feet are aching. It¡¯s time to go home. My mom takes Bailey for the night. Those two have gotten close and Bailey even calls her ¡°gamma.¡± It¡¯s so sweet. Deacon and I go home. His friends had tied cans to the back of his truck and so we rattle down the busy road, people honking as we pass. When we finally get home, he helps me out of my dress and boots and takes off his tux, then we copse in bed. He¡¯s had a bit to drink, but not to the point of being drunk. Just a nice, mellow buzz. He gets horny when he drinks. Actually, he gets horny whenever we¡¯re alone together, and that¡¯s fine by me. He rolls over on his side to face me, tracing circles around my belly button with his fingertip. ¡°What do you want to do?¡± he asks yfully. I shrug. ¡°I don¡¯t know.¡± I nce down at the giant bulge in his boxers. ¡°Go to sleep?¡± The crestfallen look on his face has meughing out loud. ¡°You¡¯re a cruel woman,¡± he says. I roll over on my side to face him. God, he¡¯s beautiful. That sculpted jaw, big green eyes. I¡¯ve never met a more handsome man. And now he¡¯s all mine. My husband. He wants to spend the rest of his life with only me. It¡¯s still hard for me to wrap my mind around that. How did I get so lucky? Chapter 32 Chapter 32 ¡°Or ¡­¡± I say, caressing the clothed shaft of his cock with the back of my hand. ¡°I like ¡®or,¡¯¡± he says, and kisses me. His hand tickles the skin of my lower back, sliding a finger down the crack of my ass. His lips be more eager until he¡¯s kissing me as if his life depended on it. He flips me over onto my back and practically tears my bra and panties off. So it¡¯s going to be like that, I think with sudden excitement. Making slow, passionate love is wonderful. The orgasms are explosive. But there is something about when he fucks me like a mad person that drives me crazy. N?velDrama.Org owns this. I frantically peel his boxers off of him, springing loose his gorgeous cock. He reaches between us, rolling my clit in his fingers. I moan into his open mouth, encouraging him. His fingers dip into my waiting wet hole. The sticky sound of his fingers slipping in and out of me only seems to make him more frantic, until soon his hand is pping against me fast and furious, the muscles in his arm taut and flexing. I¡¯m howling as my first orgasm rushes me. The sound of my voice can probably be heard by the entire neighborhood but neither of us cares. Once they see all those cans tied to the truck out front, they¡¯ll understand. He doesn¡¯t give me time toe down from the first orgasm. Instead he dives face first between my legs. It¡¯s so wet down there, but that doesn¡¯t stop him from devouring every drop of my juices. He¡¯s a fiend for it, delving his tongue in and out, straining to reach more. He licks my asshole too. That¡¯s always a startling feeling and I¡¯m still not used to it. Once the initial shock of it wears off, I let myself slip into the pleasure of the feelings he¡¯s giving me. He¡¯s so thorough, spending as much time down there as needed to get me to the peak of my arousal. Never in a hurry. Finally, when I can¡¯t take anymore, I say, ¡°Fuck me.¡± ¡°As you wish,¡± he says. He eagerly slips his cock into me. No hesitation, no teasing with just the head as he sometimes does. It¡¯s just full-force pration. I gasp as he ms into me. With all of his force, he drills into me, the headboard hitting the wall so hard it sounds as though it might punch right through the drywall. Neither of us cares, though. Maybe we will in the morning, but right now it just feels so fucking amazing, neither of us are willing to slow it down. Grasping his ass cheeks, they flex beneath my hand. My legs are up in the air, arms folded behind my knees to lift my ass higher, getting myself in the best possible position so that he can thrust deeper inside of me. Hard sex with Deacon is always a bncing act between pain and pleasure. In the beginning, when he would fuck me hard like he¡¯s doing now, there was always a fear in the recesses of my mind of bodily harm. He¡¯s so big I was afraid he might cause some internal damage. But now my body is used to it and I know I can take it, and so those little tendrils of pain only add to the excitement. ¡°I love that fucking pussy,¡± he says. Each wordnds on a thrust so that there¡¯s a pause between each one. ¡°Come for me baby, I want to make you feel good.¡± Normally I participate in the dirty banter, but I¡¯m right on the cusp of an orgasm. My words don¡¯t work. Instead I scream, ¡°Oh fuck!¡± We must¡¯ve reached our peak at the same time, because he lets out a roar and starts fucking me so hard the entire room blurs. And then he stops, his cock twitching inside of me as he releases his load. When he pulls out of me, ourbined juices run down my ass, leaving a wet spot on the bed. Both of us are too out of breath to speak. Instead we curl up together and soon fall asleep. I¡¯m nervous as we walk into the courthouse. My entire body is shaking as we go through the metal detector. Sam hired the bestwyer middle-ss money could buy. It was his wedding gift to us. Deacon has chewed his nails until there¡¯s hardly anything left of them. Neither of us says anything as we enter the courtroom. We just clutch each other¡¯s hands and hold on for dear life. My momes in with us, holding Bailey. We are ready for the fight of our lives. Karen¡¯swyer is sitting on the bench, holding his cellphone and texting. He keeps ncing at us and ourwyer. He looks sleazy. Just the type of person someone like Karen would hire. The judge enters the room. We all rise. Then eventually we¡¯re given permission to sit. Still no Karen. All the dread I¡¯ve been feeling for the past could of weeks, shifts into something else. Not quite relief yet, because this isn¡¯t over. Not yet. But no Karen has to be a good sign, right? ¡°Where¡¯s your client, Mr. Montgomery?¡± the judge says to Karen¡¯swyer. ¡°I¡¯m afraid she¡¯s not here.¡± Chapter 33 Chapter 33 ¡°Would you like to change the date?¡± he asks. Deacon and I look at each other. We don¡¯t want a different date. We want to get this over with. ¡°I¡¯m afraid not. My client won¡¯t be showing up at all. She¡¯s left the state.¡± Deacon squeezes my hand, fighting a smile. It¡¯s all either of us can do to stop jumping up and down with joy. Owned by N?velDrama.Org. ¡°Very well then,¡± the judge says. He¡¯s an older man, worn down, and looks like he doesn¡¯t have much patience for anyone anymore. I imagine that¡¯s what happens when you have to sit through court day in and day out for a living. ¡°Mr. and Mrs. McCarthy¡ª¡± (That¡¯s us. It still sounds weird to be called Mrs. anything, let alone by Deacan¡¯sst name. I love it, though. When I first changed it, I spent hours practicing my new signature) ¡°¡ªI am granting you full custody of Bailey McCarthy. Congrattions.¡± Deacon and I are both crying as we cling to each other. We finally have our happy family together and there¡¯s nothing anyone can do to ever get between us again. THE END Want more of Deacon and Remy? Sign up here for an extended epilogue! Ande say hi on Facebook! https://.facebook/PennyWylder Wilder by Frankie Love Want an exclusive look at the first two chapters of WILDER: The Mountain Man¡¯s Babies by Frankie Love? Keep reading! Wilderes out on January 12! Sign up here to Frankie¡¯s mailing list to get notified when it goes live! 1 The longer I¡¯m out here, the harder leaving the mountain bes. Damn, it¡¯s crazy to think that just a few years ago I was giving my business partner Jaxon a bad time about selling his shit and staking a im in the woods, and now, here I am. A few trips out to these woods sold me on them. The pine trees, the clean air, the clear blue sky, and the quiet. Well, it was quiet. Not too quiet anymore. I swear this ce ought to be called the Fertile Mountain. There are babies fussing all over the ce. They¡¯re cute as hell, but there are a lot of them. Jax and Harper have four, their three-year-old triplet boys and a one-year-old baby girl. Rosie and Buck have their three daughters--two-year-old twins, and a six-month-old baby, and my brother and his wife have a set of newborn twins to boot. That¡¯s a helluva lot of babies. I close my suitcase, wishing I were packing clothes that are a little more me. nnels and blue jeans. But I¡¯m going to Seattle to fucking charm the pants off some exec who wants to film a reality show out in the woods. Apparently, they think mountain men that build custom homes who have a bunch of babies might equal good television. What the fuck do I know about TV? Not much, but Jaxon and Buck don¡¯t want the crew around their women unless they¡¯ve been vetted first. We need to know their intentions before we set them loose on our property. That¡¯s why I¡¯m out here. Before I went into business with Jax, I went tow school. Fuckin¡¯ A, right? But I didn¡¯tst long. Hated the bullshit then, and I hate it now. I didn¡¯t want to be in an office¨CI wanted to use my hands. But I¡¯m also the right person to go meet with this show, find out what they are nning. Hell, I don¡¯t have a woman and children to look after. God knows no one is gonna miss me. After pulling on my winter coat, I lock my front door. Toss my luggage in the truck, and head down the mountain. On my way out of town, I stop at Rosie¡¯s Diner to have lunch with the guys. Jaxon and Buck are already there, sitting in a booth, shooting the shit. I slide in next to Jaxon. Facing Buck, I watch as his eyesnd on his woman who¡¯s walking toward our table. Lucky bastard to have a woman like Rosie. Funny, sincere, genuine. Both these jackasses won the goddamn lottery when it came to womennding on their doorstep. ¡°You boys having your usual?¡± Rosie asks, pouring us ck coffee. ¡°Yes, ma¡¯am,¡± I tell her, having a sweet spot for her meatloaf sammy. ¡°I need a Rosie Special, I¡¯ve gotta long day ahead of me.¡± ¡°Flying out of Coeur d''Alene?¡± she asks. I nod. I¡¯m gonna drive the two hours to the city, then fly over to Seattle for tomorrow¡¯s meeting. Buck asks for a burger and fries, and Jax grunts out his order. Rosie pauses before heading to the back and says, ¡°You boys think this is a good idea? Because from where I¡¯m standing, a TV crew is going to make a racket we aren¡¯t prepared for.¡± ¡°I know, baby,¡± Buck tells her, threading his arm around his wife¡¯s waist. ¡°But this fell in ourp, we might as well see it through. Things tend to happen for a reason, you know? And the exposure for the company could be huge.¡± Buck is a chainsaw artist by trade, but after the babies came, he joined our custom homepany. Gotta put food on the table, and all that shit. Chapter 34 Chapter 34 Rosie smirks. ¡°I don¡¯t know, Buck. Right now I think Harper and I are mostly worried about our boy Dean Wilder, here,¡± she says, pointing to me. ¡°About finding him a good, solid wife. And I don¡¯t see how that¡¯s going to happen in Seattle.¡± Jaxonughs. ¡°Yeah, you don¡¯t want some woman who can¡¯t hack it in the woods.¡± Rosie furrows her brow. ¡°Buck tells me you weren¡¯t always a mountain man yourself, Jaxon. Careful now.¡± Jaxon runs his hand over his beard, shaking his head at us. ¡°Yeah, but you and Harper have the right disposition for this life. Not every woman does, is all.¡± ¡°I¡¯m right here, you know,¡± I tell them, raising an eyebrow at this crew who thinks they know what I need. ¡°We know, Wilder, we know.¡± Buckughs, lifting his coffee to his mouth. ¡°We just feel bad for you. Never gettingid, all by your lonesome up there in your tiny cabin.¡± Iugh, ¡°You guys are a bunch of fuckers, you know that?¡± Rosie clucks her tongue. ¡°Regardless, we know that you need a woman, but not some city-slicker girl who won¡¯t y nice with us.¡± ¡°You¡¯re telling me not to getid when I¡¯m in Seattle?¡± I shake my head, knowing I¡¯d never tell Rosie this, but the prospect of gettingid tonight is half the reason I said I¡¯d go. ¡°You can sleep with whomever, Wilder. I¡¯m just saying, don¡¯t knock anybody up that we haven¡¯t approved.¡± ¡°She talks to you like that, too?¡± I ask Buck. He just grins like a lovesick puppy. Rosie winks at her husband before going back to the kitchen. ¡°You know she¡¯s just giving you a hard time, right?¡± Buck says. ¡°The girls just want you to be happy,¡± Jaxon says. ¡°And selfishly they want another friend. It¡¯s lonely up here for them, too.¡± Living in the mountains is great. I set my own hours, am my own boss, and work with the greatest guys I¡¯ve ever known. But damn, Jaxon, my oldest friend, hit the nail on the goddamn head. ¡°I know, I know,¡± I tell them, before I take another drink of my coffee, knowing just how lonely it can be up here. Damn, maybe I need to get off this mountain more than I thought. I need to go getid. And badly. 2 what?¡± I furrow my brows not understanding why my sister can¡¯t just support me. That¡¯s what I need. That¡¯s all I¡¯ve wanted. My family to have my back. She takes a sip of her mimosa before answering. ¡°It¡¯s so tacky.¡± We¡¯re having brunch in a swanky Seattle bistro, something French and something expensive and she doesn¡¯t seem to understand that we all aren¡¯t married to stockbrokers living in posh waterfront homes. Some of us are just trying to pay rent and a reality TV show seems like the best offer I¡¯ve seentely. ¡°You are such a talented interior designer, and you¡¯ll make more money updating the homes of my friends. That house you did for na was gorgeous.¡±? N?velDrama.Org - All rights reserved. I frown. ¡°Buying furniture for mansions is redundant. I want something more exciting.¡± ¡°Well, this reality show is a bad idea. Those shows always make someone out to be the viin. What if that person is you? Your entire career could be ruined.¡± I take a deep breath; frustrated that she doesn¡¯t understand me. ¡°This show could pay my bills for the entire year.¡± ¡°Or you could just move into our spare bedroom and help watch Nicolette.¡± My mouth is in a tight line. ¡°You know I love helping with my niece, but I don¡¯t want any handouts. I want to make it on my own.¡± Anna spears a piece of pineapple, eyes narrowed. ¡°Mom and Dad think it¡¯s embarrassing. The idea of you unting around on television.¡± ¡°Mom and Dad could call and talk to me about it. If they had their way I¡¯d already be married to a guy like Brent. And that¡¯s not going to happen. Ever.¡± My sister¡¯s husband is thest sort of guy I want to be with. I want a man who cares about more than his bank ount. Anna purses her lips. ¡°You may think being married to Brent sounds like your worst nightmare, but he is able to support me and Nicolette. That counts for an awful lot.¡± Anna married for money, not love. Just like our mother. And we may be family, but our priorities have always been different. ¡°It¡¯s out of the question.¡± I fold my napkin and set it on the table. ¡°I want my freedom, and I need some money in order to do that. So I¡¯m going to try and get this gig.¡± Anna shakes her head, confused. ¡°Don¡¯t you want a family? A husband? A baby?¡± I shrug; because of course, I want those things. But I also want them on my terms. In my own time. Chapter 35 Chapter 35 ¡°One day,¡± I tell her. ¡°But I¡¯m not in a rush, Anna.¡± ¡°I know.¡± She pouts, and for a split second, I feel bad for her. Then I remember she chose this. As if ignoring myments about what I want, sheunches into a new n. ¡°Ohh! Brent can set you up with someone from work and we could have a double date. God, I need a night out.¡± She is literally thest woman I know who needs a night out. She sends Nicolette to a fancy-pants preschool, has a private chef and a personal driver. ¡°No thanks, and I doubt Brent would want to help me,¡± I snort, thinking about her husband and the way he was condescending when I told him that I wouldn¡¯t be taking my father¡¯s money. ¡°It¡¯s because you aren¡¯t grounded. Once you have your shit together, a husband, a house, and a 401k, then you and Brent will get along.¡± I swirl my mimosa, wondering what my sister lives on. I love her, I do. But she¡¯s living in a completely different gxy. Anna must sense my irritation because she softens her stance. ¡°Listen, I just care about my little sister. You¡¯re twenty-five and don¡¯t have a n.¡± I groan. ¡°I do have a n. The reality TV show is going to fund my life,¡± I exin, circling back to where we started. Anna raises her hand and signals for the check. ¡°And if you don¡¯t get the job?¡± I down the rest of my mimosa. ¡°Then I guess we¡¯ll have to go on that double date.¡± * * * Well. That sucked. I was so not supposed to eff up that interview. I was supposed to be ssy and smart and current. I was supposed to speak clearly and look at the camera. Instead, I was a bumbling mess of nerves. Aplete disaster. I was thrown the moment the concept was pitched. I thought the show would entail me making over some mansion in the Hollywood Hills, not designing the interior for a cabin in the woods. My ideas were all wrong. I was thinking gilded tables instead of buffalo id. My design work had not prepared me for this. At all. I couldn¡¯t be less suited for the job. ¡°Ms. Saint ire,¡± a television producer says, stopping me in the hall. ¡°I want you to know I was rooting for you. I saw some of the work you did in thest Seattle City magazine, and it was gorgeous, which is why I brought you in for an interview.¡± ¡°Well,¡± I tell her, swallowing tears. ¡°Thank you for your time. I know I don¡¯t have experience with this sort of design and would be all wrong for the project.¡± ¡°I wish this show was a better fit for you.¡± I take a deep breath, wishing I hadn¡¯t pinned all of my hopes on this, and say goodbye. * * * In the hotel lobby, I order a well drink, gin and soda, grateful for the happy hour prices. Sure, I could ask my parents for money, but that has never been my mode of operation. And I¡¯m not destitute. I have a few more projects lined up for the spring, and by then I will have found a few more. I look down at my phone, not having the courage to text my sister. I swear to God the moment I do she¡¯ll be making reservations for our double date. Instead, I lift my eyes and look down the bar. A man raises his pint of beer to me, smiling. Unabashedly. They aren¡¯t tiptoeing around anything. His eyes say, Slide down, sweetie. Let¡¯s make this a night to remember. I smile back, because, well, it¡¯s nice to have someone flirt with me, especially after the afternoon I¡¯ve had. Especially this someone. Owned by N?velDrama.Org. He¡¯s the opposite of Brent, even though he¡¯s in a dress shirt and tie. His shirtsleeves are rolled up, revealing tattoos on his forearm. He may clean up nice, but it¡¯s clear he¡¯s rough around the edges. His beard could rival any of the hipsters in town and he has a look that says, Let¡¯s do this, baby. Without hesitation, I pick up my drink and move four seats down the bar. I may not have gotten a television gig today, but I can certainly end the night with a bang. Wilderes out January 12! The Novel will be updated first on this website. Come back and continue reading tomorrow, everyone!