《Delta Sigma》 Prologue
[Week 0] Isabelle traced the ward stone with the tip of her boot. The 1ft by 6in by 6in solid stone slab sat flush with the ground, practically invisible within the golden summer grass. To Isabelle, it glowed a faint blue; the sigils etched into each stone almost neon. She¡¯d always found the sigils themselves beautiful. SERENITY, written in an alphabet that didn¡¯t quite fit into three dimensions. Carved into stone nevertheless. SERENITY, a blue aspiration she herself tried to embody. The next stone in line, about a foot away, would say REJECTION. Then would come INTENTION, and SERENITY again after. Repeat a few hundred times, one long line of warding wrapped around the sprawling mansion that represented their shared home. She kept walking, enjoying the cool coastal wind. It brought a chill even to summer nights, but Isabelle didn¡¯t mind it. The hillside gave a fantastic view, and she could just about make out the ocean in the distance. At night it was too dark to actually see the water, but she could see the twinkling light lining the coast and defining the crescent shape of the bay. SERENITY, all the way to the horizon. Isabelle walked down the north slope for the final time of her watch shift. It wasn¡¯t the worst way to spend to spend three hours, and she got to feel the act of service with each dutiful step. Halfway down the slope, she noticed it. The smallest spike in adrenaline, as her body told her what her mind hadn¡¯t quite caught up to yet. Something yet distant, but rapidly approaching. She¡¯d be tested tonight. She leant down to touch the nearest ward, and the steady vibrations confirmed it for her. The stones always quaked a little, like train tracks beneath an approaching locomotive. She followed the line to where the vibrations were strongest, then knelt and waited. Everyone in her greater chosen family had a different ritual here, but for her kneeling had always felt the most right. SERENITY, in the face of danger. A few minutes later, the skitterer emerged from the brush. It dwarfed her, not so much in height, but unquestionably in length. At about 6 feet tall, she only had to look up a little to see its ¡®face¡¯, a chitinous black crushing apparatus that reminded her of a beetle¡¯s jaw. The head lacked eyes, but made up for it with its oversized maw, a gaping black hole at the center of the beetle-jaw. The rest of its 12 foot length comprised a long torso and seven asymmetrical legs. One of her sisters had once tried to classify them by leg count, by torso shape, by jaw, but none of it had led anywhere. They were too random, too illogical, too not-from-this-world for human minds to sort. You might be reading a stolen copy. Visit Royal Road for the authentic version. Even the long, fishlike scales of their torso shined in an un-color that eyes couldn¡¯t properly perceive¨CKevin had said the word for it once, but no one else had been able to hear it. Isabelle thought it was closest to a kaleidoscopic iridescence, flashing an otherworldly light as they rushed towards you (because they were always rushing, always skittering across the ground, always scampering towards large sources of magical energy). It approached at the speed of an oncoming car, but Isabelle didn¡¯t move from her spot. SERENITY, before life or death. It tried to hop over her kneeling form, only to collide with the invisible wall of the warding line. Rejection¨CIntention¨CSerenity¨CRejection in an ever repeating pattern. Will carved into rock carved into their universe. An irrefutable statement, as Frankie once called it. The wards wouldn¡¯t last forever, so Isabelle prepared herself to implant her own will into the universe. She thought of her family, thought of her commitment to them and to each other. Thought of her Miss. Thought of everything they all shared. Then she thought of fire. The magic manifested a little differently every time. This time, it evoked embers. The ground under the skitterer began to glow, chaparral turning into coals turning into heat. There was a moment where the air shimmered, where her enemy was standing on the lingering smolders of a dead bonfire. Then the bonfire came back to life. The ward line kept the excess heat out just as much as it did the skitterer¨Cbetter even, since the fire lacked any intention of breaking through. Unfortunately, the skitterer kept the heat out almost as well. Flames licked over its body and into the sky, but it kept pounding on the wall. Unfortunate luck then¨Cthis one was temperature insensitive, and this night was about to get considerably more difficult. Isabelle closed her eyes to think, but opened them almost immediately when she heard¨Cno felt¨Cthe crack. Her eyes swept the closest stones. The one just to her left, REJECTION, had a jagged vertical break running through it. It wasn¡¯t going to hold much longer. An incident on a previous night must have weakened it. Maybe not enough for it to be caught in inspection, but enough. In moments, the will for REJECTION embedded in solid stone would be overwhelmed by the skitterer¡¯s single minded desire for ENTRY. The lone sentinel thought fast¨Chit the alert beacon on her keychain¨Cand crawled over to the stone. She placed her hands on it, let herself think thoughts of rejection: the unwelcome advance of a boy, the unwanted love of a mother, the abandonment of friends. She directed the thoughts through the stone and into the wall. It helped, briefly, but will alone would never be as powerful as will together, even this close to the house. The rumbling took on a discordant tone as the stone began to fail. Shouts from the house, her backup on the way. Not fast enough¨Cshe¡¯d have to hold the line. She took a breath. SERENITY, before an uncertain future. Isabelle gathered her serenity around her soul, then thought thoughts of physical destruction. Her nightstick graced her hand like an old friend, drank her intentions like a greedy spirit, and the mostly human girl readied herself for a close combat fight. I. Luna [Week 0.7] Luna took a deep breath before exiting the elevator. The layout of the dorm still felt unfamiliar, very different from the Northside engineering dorm she¡¯d spent her first year in. One year into transition still wasn¡¯t all that much, but this year she was going to be more social and that meant living on the other side of campus. So far, living with people who hadn¡¯t known her during the awkward first few months of hormones likewise resulted in considerably better treatment. Passing was still something that only seemed to happen situationally, and reactions to her ran all the way from obvious disgust and dirty jokes (fortunately rare) to uncomfortable avoidance (unfortunately common) to overly exuberant support (unfortunately not rare). If she got called brave one more time, she¡¯d melt into a puddle and flee to the nearest gutter. She snuck past the common room. She¡¯d had a long day, and didn¡¯t need to spend more time performing for people who had little in common with her. On average, people were, of course, outwardly accepting. This wasn¡¯t the Midwest, after all. But the subtle things? Being weird and different and often still awkward¨Cit wasn¡¯t easy. Two doors from safety Leo¡¯s door sat open, but his headphones were on and he didn¡¯t look up as she walked by. Tina, her roommate, was still at her biology lecture, so for at least for the next hour her dorm room would be empty. Luna¡¯s door opened with a groan, and the usual pile of cafeteria dishes greeted her from Tina¡¯s desk. Tina was nice, didn¡¯t misgender her, and helped her find a better matching foundation ahead of rush week last weekend, so Luna didn¡¯t mind that she wasn¡¯t the cleanest roommate. People came with their own ups and downs, and she¡¯d gladly trade more kindness for needing some help keeping things tidy. It helped that their shared space wasn¡¯t exactly big, and keeping it clean wasn¡¯t that hard. It was just two beds on opposite sides, tiny desks with windows in between, with shelving to offer just the tiniest bit of separation. Next to the door, two wardrobes. Luna glanced around their room. She¡¯d decorated her side with a pride flag, an old SOPHIE poster, and a piece of fan art from Kushiel¡¯s Dart. Tina had put up some K-pop bands Luna wasn¡¯t familiar with, and otherwise hadn¡¯t done much yet. It was definitely a little messy today, so Luna decided to do a cleaning pass on the whole place. She still carried last week¡¯s gratitude, and the act of service was a pleasant distraction from waiting for rush week results. She started with her own desk. It was covered in sticky notes detailing her feelings on different sororities. She¡¯d written them in a moment of optimism at the start of the week, when she thought she might actually have to choose which one she preferred. They wouldn¡¯t make a difference now. The lists of names and details she¡¯d tried to memorize to make a better impression wouldn¡¯t matter anymore, either. She stared at the note at the top of the pile. Tanya. Vice President of Kappa Kappa. She¡¯d actually managed to talk to her on one of the first few rush days. It wasn¡¯t a deep conversation¨Cshe¡¯d kept things going, but the other girl was obviously uninterested from the start. There was a blue sticky note representing Tamara, the recruitment chair of Lambda Gamma Kappa. That conversation had lasted longer¨Cthe girl at least made eye contact¨Cbut the outcome had been the same. She hadn¡¯t received an invite from them either. Off to the left¨CCassandra, the president of Alpha Beta Kappa. Not a sorority she¡¯d even dream of having a chance with. She¡¯d been nice at the mixer, at least. It was a depressing picture. She wasn¡¯t tiny, pretty, or cis. And over and over again in the last week it had been clear that that was exactly what these sororities were looking for. There was one almost-exception: a hastily scribbled note with nothing but ¡°Kacie from Delta Sigma¡±¨Cnot a sorority she¡¯d really found much about online. They¡¯d met at the midweek mixer, when Luna had sought a moment of quiet by cleaning some confetti. It was a moment of embarrassment¨Cshe was a guest, supposed to be charming the sorority members, and instead she was cleaning like some kind of maid. Hiding from the overwhelming number of people, the repeated silent rejections, the constant reminder that she wasn¡¯t a real girl. She¡¯d expected some kind of comment. Instead, the girl had silently cleaned with her, then disappeared off somewhere when they were done. They hadn¡¯t said a word the whole time, and somehow that made it perfect. The shared silent labor had helped her recover, and she¡¯d found the spoons to socialize for the rest of the event¨Cto bang herself a few more times against the barriers put up by her birth gender. She wished she could find the girl again, make a better impression. Instead, she had this sticky note. And, somehow, when she opened her purse the next day, an invitation to the Thursday Delta Sigma event. She couldn¡¯t imagine it being for any reason besides pity. Luna went anyway. The event itself had been a bunch of strange team-building exercises. They were fun, especially since the structured nature meant she couldn¡¯t be excluded. The whole day was a little unusual. Some sisters wore black wrist bracers and mostly ran the show, while a few with black chokers and animal masks¨Cincluding someone she eventually recognized as Kacie, actually¨Cwere mostly fetching things and assisting the rest. It felt like something out of a strange dream. But the way they stood perfectly still when they weren¡¯t moving was absolutely breathtaking. Luna broke out of her reminiscing to stare at the notes again. They could stay. She¡¯d clean them up later. She threw out the old scratch paper Tina had dropped on the floor. Then she grabbed the plates from Tina¡¯s desk and headed to the cafeteria. On the way, she ran into James, a fellow sophomore she¡¯d met in Mentors in Stem last year. He was also studying computer science, and he lived a floor below her, which was unfortunate since Mentors in Steam was an organization Luna was currently trying to gracefully ghost. ¡°Hey Luna!¡± he near shouted when he saw her, ¡°did you get the notes from the Systems lecture today?¡± Luna gave him a sideways glance, but tried to keep walking. ¡°You know I don¡¯t miss lectures.¡± If you discover this tale on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the violation. ¡°Right, right,¡± he continued, catching up to her side. ¡°Mind bringing them to the Mentors meeting tonight?¡± Luna flinched. Apparently skipping the mandatory first meeting of the semester hadn¡¯t been enough of a message. She sighed. ¡°James¡­ You know I meant it when I said Mentors was my favorite club I joined last year. You¡¯re all super kind, and you even handled my transition well.¡± ¡°But?¡± James asked. She breathed. ¡°But it¡¯s just¡­¡± How do you tell people something just doesn¡¯t click about hanging out with them? ¡°I¡¯m trying to keep exploring, okay?¡± Luna tried. It was as honest an answer as she could give. In truth Mentors in Engineering was the only club she¡¯d felt safe in so far. Women in Tech had made it very clear that she had a guest pass towards womanhood at best, and while the Undergraduate Engineering Association had welcomed her, one of the women officers had reposted something incredibly TERF-y on her Twitter just last week. ¡°I¨C¡° it was too much to explain. How could she explain that their acceptance wasn¡¯t enough? That not posting anti-trans dog whistles on Twitter didn¡¯t make them the place she wanted to spend the next four years? Mentors in Engineering, with their focus on educating children, had been a godsend. When she¡¯d joined, she was still struggling with basics like simple makeup, and they¡¯d welcome her with open arms. But she wanted more than acceptance. She wanted to be understood. And she¡¯d spend the rest of her life looking if that¡¯s what it took. Which is how she ended up making a Hail Mary bid to join a sorority in her sophomore year¨Cnot that her bid looked very promising right now. James, for his part, let his disappointment show on his face. He gave her a pained grimace. ¡°That¡¯s sucks to hear, you were really great with the kids.¡± ¡°I know, I liked the kids a lot,¡± Luna said. His shoulders went slack and his face sunk. ¡°Fuck, we were counting on you to be one of the group leaders, too.¡± Luna couldn¡¯t bear seeing him hurting. Or the idea that she was letting people down. ¡°I¡¯m sorry, James¡­¡± She looked away. ¡°I guess I could come by tonight? See if I can make the time?¡± James immediately brightened up. ¡°We¡¯d be so grateful.¡± He turned to the elevator door, a soft ding announcing its arrival. ¡°You¡¯re going to do such a great job this year¡± Luna watched him get into the elevator, kicked herself. She always did this. She¡¯d need to text him and cancel¨Cor something. She couldn¡¯t let herself get sucked in. But that was a concern for later. For now, she could worry about something simple, like dropping off the dirty dishes. She turned away from the elevator and continued to the cafeteria. Big public spaces still spooked her a little. She drew less attention now than last year, but the fear lingered. Fortunately the dish drop was near the entrance, and she could probably make a quick escape back to her room. She wasn¡¯t quite so lucky. ¡°Excuse me, sir!¡± someone yelled behind her. Gut instinct screamed, but she took two more steps, hoping she was wrong, hoping¨C ¡°excuse me sir! You dropped your wallet!¡± She snuck a hand to her¨Cshoot why were girl pockets always so small? She took a deep breath, turned, focused on finding the right resonance in her voice, then spoke up. ¡°It¡¯s mine, I think.¡± At least the undergraduate had the decency to look embarrassed. ¡°Ahh, ehh, sorry ma¡¯am.¡± He handed the wallet back to her, and Luna completed her errand as fast as she could. She should feel happy, that at least her effort voice training had paid off, that seeing her front had made it clear ¡°no, this is a girl, or at least someone trying to be one.¡± But it hurt, like someone accidentally punching a shoulder that had been broken and swollen and unable to heal for her entire childhood. A bruise over her heart, a strain on her soul. A knife that twisted in her gut with every ¡°he¡± ¡°sir¡± ¡°mr.¡± And that hurt followed her all the way back to her dorm. It had been easier, last year. Of course people would look at her and see a man. But the more progress she made, the more invalidating the setbacks. At this point, after a year of hormones and hundreds if not thousands of hours of effort, every misgendering seemed to scream ¡°It doesn¡¯t matter what you do, you¡¯ll never be a real girl.¡± She knew she should text James, but she really didn¡¯t want to deal with other humans now. She decided she¡¯d do some homework first. Almost an hour later, Tina texted her, saying she¡¯d spend the evening with some boy and wouldn¡¯t be home until late. She should really text James. But she didn¡¯t know what to say. She could spend some time working on her dream journal. She moved from her desk to her bed and began her lucid dreaming routine. Her escape from the brutality of growing up in the wrong body. She let herself fall asleep then drifted through dream worlds. Sometimes she¡¯d create or explore particular places. Today she just let herself relax, let her subconscious shape the places and just sat in them. She ended up in an old favorite. A mountain vista on an alien world with a view of an inhuman metropolis. A place where she could observe and not be observed. She sat her dream-self against a tree and just drifted with the view. When she woke up it was almost 6, and she realized she¡¯d need to head out soon if she¡¯d wanted to make the meeting. She should text James, but it would be rude to cancel now. Her chest tightened up, her throat clamped shut, she felt trapped. She didn¡¯t want to be rude, and it was just one meeting? She grabbed her jacket, checked her makeup, and walked to the engineering quadrant. The meeting room was under the engineering library; a dark place without windows. James was already there, as well as a bunch of people whose names Luna still couldn¡¯t remember. One of them approached her¨Cthey¡¯d been assigned to the same school last year. Luna was glad she at least recognized them. This might definitely become awkward. ¡°Hi Luna!¡± the near-stranger said. ¡°Hi!¡± She forced herself to keep eye contact. ¡°Glad to see you with us again. You¡¯re a huge help.¡± Luna forced a friendly smile. ¡°Yeah¡­ glad to be here!¡± Luckily, the meeting was starting and she didn¡¯t have to fake her way through anymore social interactions. The worst moment came halfway through the meeting. This year¡¯s president, a blonde guy named Tim or Tom or something else with a T, made an announcement. ¡°So we¡¯ve actually got one problem to solve for this year,¡± he began, ¡°we have enough group leaders, but Sarah, our treasurer, can¡¯t do the club anymore. She ran uncontested, and the year¡¯s already starting, so instead of the usual leadership election, we¡¯re going to take nominations. Raise your hand if you¡¯ve got someone, and no nominating yourself.¡± No one raised their hand at first. Luna didn¡¯t have anyone to nominate, so at least she wouldn¡¯t have to raise her hand in public. Then James chimed in. ¡°I think Luna would make a great treasurer.¡± Luna¡¯s adrenaline spiked. Everyone looked at her. She needed to think of something to say. ¡°Uhhh, ahhh, I¡¯m a little busy this year? And I don¡¯t think I could do a very good job. I¡¯m sure there¡¯s someone better?¡± President T¨C gave her a beseeching look. ¡°You did great work last year, and we could really use the help. You¡¯re definitely qualified. We¡¯d all be really grateful.¡± Luna froze. Too many people. They needed her. They¡¯d be so disappointed if she let them down. Perhaps if she¡¯d had something else to do she would have dredged up the last bit of will power and pushed back. But she didn¡¯t. This week had been a disaster. Her calendar was going to be empty. ¡°Sure, I guess,¡± she conceded. Not how she had planned for this to go. But when all of the the sororities rejected her at least she¡¯d have Mentors in STEM. She spent the rest of the meeting trying to wrap her head around what she just agreed to. When it was over, a bunch of people thanked her. She¡¯d have to find some way to learn their names now. The walk back was uneventful, but when she opened her door she immediately felt something off. It looked undisturbed at first glance, but when she walked back to her desk she saw it: The sticky notes had been neatly stacked at the top of her desk. Except for the ones about Delta Sigma, which were placed in a neat row across the center. Someone had drawn a smiley on the last one. In the space cleared up by the unasked-for ¡®organizing¡¯, they¡¯d placed a plain white envelope. A wave of adrenaline ran through Luna¡¯s body. The sense of violation warred with awe at the audacity, but all of that was crushed by a single thought. ¡®No one breaks into a dorm to deliver a rejection.¡¯ She rushed over and opened it. In it was a plain piece of paper with a date and time on it¨Ctomorrow afternoon. The text below was simple. ¡°We¡¯d like to kindly invite you to initiation at Delta Sigma.¡± Luna let out a happy squeal. Not a rejection at all. II. Claire
[Week 0.7] Claire jammed her foot into the chair next to Zoey and carefully nudged it out from under the table. Her hands did a careful dance to keep her overfilled lunch tray in balance. Getting a hot chocolate on top of the orange juice always made things a little crowded, but it was a comfort treat for her and she wouldn¡¯t leave the cafeteria line without it. Zoey gave her an eye roll. They¡¯d become fast friends on move-in day, when they both got assigned to the same floor¨Cespecially since both had decided to rush a sorority. As far as Claire could tell, Zoey had always been popular, and joining a sorority was just the next logical step in the progression of senior class president, high school cheerleader, and presumably eventually president of the universe. Claire sat down and tried to mind her lipstick as she dug into her macaroni and cheese. For her, this was all still new. Puberty had finally come for her in senior year, and her once gangly body finally showed some of the curves of ¡°womanhood¡±. College was a time for fresh starts, a chance to leave behind the bridge competitions and captaining the robotics teams and be popular herself. She just had to make it through rush week. ¡°So, which ones were your favorite?¡± she asked Zoey. ¡°Alpha Kappa Beta was sooo cool,¡± Zoey cooed. ¡°The black tie murder mystery? Brilliant, and everyone there was sooo elegant. Their house is so classy too. It all fit together so well.¡± Claire winced. AKB had been her top choice, but she hadn¡¯t been invited to the black tie event. As far as sorority recruitment went, that was a rejection, and an early one at that. ¡°Where were you instead, again?¡± Zoey continued, ¡°Delta Sigma?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± Claire shook her head. ¡°We did these strange team-building activities. For one of them a bunch of us were blindfolded, and had to be moved into shapes by other potential new members, then shape the next person in line ourselves. Zoey scrunched her face a little. ¡°That sounds super weird.¡± ¡°The other one wasn¡¯t much better¨Cwe had to do these weird trust exercises. Also, a bunch of their members wore these masks and chokers and stayed silent the whole time. They pretty much only held things for the members running the event. It was almost like some kind of Eyes Wide Shut imitation.¡± And it had evoked strange feelings inside Claire. She didn¡¯t have words for it, except that it felt fugitive and private and not like something she wanted to share. ¡°I really hope Lambda Gamma Kappa takes me,¡± she changed the subject, ¡°their event was super fun.¡± Zoey took another bite of her food, then took a thoughtful moment to finish chewing. ¡°Yeah, they¡¯re also one of the best!¡± she said, ¡°I hope they take you. Hey, who knows, one of the AKB could have made a mistake and maybe they¡¯ll still give you a bid? I was talking to Wendy and Yandice and they both thought the process was a little chaotic this year.¡± Claire looked down at her plate. They both knew it was unlikely. Zoey already had so many friends. ¡°Yeah,¡± she mumbled, ¡°who knows.¡± Zoey gave her a nudge. ¡°Brighten up, Claire, you¡¯re a catch for any sorority. VP of the bridge competition? Quiz bowl champion? You did super well in that writing competition too!¡± Claire slammed down her mug. She didn¡¯t want people thinking about her past. It was a source of embarassment, not pride. ¡°Sororities don¡¯t care about that stuff,¡± Clair spat, ¡°it¡¯s ¡®will you make us look hot at a party? Will you suck enough dick?¡¯¡± ¡°That¡¯s not the right attitude, girl, and you know it,¡± Zoey chided, ¡°Besides you¡¯ve really cleaned up. You need to work on your confidence is all.¡± Claire said nothing, choosing not to vent her frustration at someone who was supposed to become a close friend. It didn¡¯t save the rest of lunch from an uncomfortable awkwardness. It ended early as well, with Claire¡¯s phone ringing with a call from her mother. ¡°Shoot, I¡¯m sorry, I need to take this.¡± She gave Zoey a frown. ¡°Do you mind taking away my plates for me?¡± Zoey gave her a look but shooed her off. ¡°Hi Mom. I asked you not to call me during the day, remember?¡± She speedwalked past the other diners, towards the adjacent garden ¡°What I can¡¯t be interested in what my favorite oldest daughter is doing?¡± Donna Moretti asked. Claire pinched the bridge of her nose. ¡°Mom, it¡¯s just that usually I¡¯m doing things. What do you want?¡± ¡°Your dad is going to one of his exams at the hospital again this week,¡± she said, ¡°and they want his CT scans from last year.¡± ¡°Mom this could have been a text message. They¡¯re in the file organizer on the desk in the office.¡± Claire reached the garden and let out a breath. At least she wasn¡¯t bothering people indoors now. ¡°Well I also wanted to hear from you?¡± Donna continued, ¡°I thought maybe you forget me with all of your college things. Have you joined any clubs yet? I hear the Women in Tech Association has a stellar reputation.¡± ¡°Mom, I was actually thinking of joining a sorority,¡± Claire tried. ¡°Pah, aren¡¯t you a little bit too nerdy?¡± It wasn¡¯t actually a question. ¡°This is like that summer you tried to run for class treasurer.¡± ¡°Mom¡­¡± Claire whimpered. Her biological mother didn¡¯t notice. ¡°You just aren¡¯t good at popularity contests, sweetie. You should join the Women in Tech club. They have a great reputation and it¡¯ll help you network.¡± If you encounter this tale on Amazon, note that it''s taken without the author''s consent. Report it. Claire took a deep, shuddering breath. ¡°Mom, I have classes I need to get to, I¡¯ll talk to you later. I love you.¡± ¡°So soon? I love you honey. Call me sometime this week.¡± Claire took the roundabout way back to her dorm, passing by the student services building. Calls from her mother always left her tense, and she felt a bit guilty about that. It wasn¡¯t what a good daughter was supposed to feel. But she couldn¡¯t help avoiding it as much as possible. She passed by the announcements board. There was the usual warning about staying out at night, since apparently last year the number of missing student cases had risen for the third year running. A few club advertisements for engineering groups she wasn¡¯t going to join anymore. A poster put up by student government¨Cmore interesting but after her experience in high school not something she wanted to expose herself to again. All those people judging her, deciding she wasn¡¯t cool or popular enough even though she had such good ideas¨Cthey could take their student government and shove it. She was better now. She reached her dorm on the 8th floor and hurried back to her room. Jonathan¡¯s door opened as she walked past and Claire almost jumped against the wall. ¡°Hi Claire!¡± She pulled the armor back on. Smiled a charming smile. ¡°Hi Jonathan.¡± ¡°Want to work on the physics assignment later, I got a study group together?¡± He asked. ¡°I was actually going to work in the library, sorry.¡± It had been an automatic excuse, but she genuinely preferred working alone. ¡°Oh stop being so frigid¨C¡° ¡°If I wanted to stay warm,¡± Claire cut in, ¡°I¡¯d need more than just your little bit of hot air, Jonathan.¡± Jonathan gawked as she strutted back to her room. Claire was trying to be more social, to stop being so nerdy, but Jonathan was a dick. She grabbed her backpack and left the dorm. Campus was in the middle of the greater coastal urban sprawl, and it was cramped enough that the dorms had been built slightly outside of it, in piecemeal plots of land the school had bought when it realized that development was only going to make things more expensive from here. It wasn¡¯t a wealthy area by any means, but being in California meant luxury rents on top of grimy buildings and frequent homelessness. Her orientation leader had told them they would get used to it, learn to tell dangerous situations from someone who was just the harmless kind of mentally ill. Apparently just ignoring them almost always worked. She¡¯d watched some older students and that definitely seemed to work for them, but most of the freshman still jumped whenever a homeless person ambled by. She felt bad about it¨Cshe¡¯d read a book once that mentioned the social isolation making the mental health effects of homelessness much worse¨Cbut even so she couldn¡¯t quite get the warnings about dangerous parts of town and unsafe hours at night out of her head. Once she crossed into campus itself, the square layout of city streets disappeared and transitioned into the winding paths, green lawns, and free standing halls of an American university. She walked past Bellwether Hall, an old, 4 story brick and mortar building that housed the university¡¯s English department, then passed by the new student union building. She headed downhill, past the campus glade, and into Parker Library. It wasn¡¯t the only library on campus, but it was the biggest, and the one that made it on all the brochures. An enormous building, with a giant, cavernous main room lit by multi story glass windows split by neoclassical columns. That room wasn¡¯t her final destination. Instead, she took a staircase in the first hall down to the underground stacks, then wove through the maze of mobile shelves to a cornered reading nook she¡¯d found during the second afternoon of orientation. It contained a small table, a chair with its back to the wall, and minimal no foot traffic. Claire let out a breath. It¡¯s not that she didn¡¯t like people, she just found quiet secluded spaces relaxing, especially if she could see anybody approaching. It quieted something she didn¡¯t fully understand. She grabbed her laptop from her backpack and looked at the Week 1 physics problem set. They¡¯d been warned multiple times¨Conce during orientation, again by their advisors, and then more by their professors¨Cthat in going to a top state school they would no longer find themselves breezing through course work. Put the top 10% from across the state into one room and 90% will lose their accustomed spot. Claire wasn¡¯t sure where she fell. She hadn¡¯t exactly studied hard for the SATs and done plenty well, but this was college. Looking over her physics problems was a moment of relief. Some of these she didn¡¯t know how to solve, all of them would take effort, but none of this was impossible. She could do this. Study groups were for other people, she would understand, and then she would solve. Simple. She spent the next two hours working on the problems, intermittently pausing to read a fantasy novel she¡¯d downloaded onto her phone. She liked physics, but that didn¡¯t make homework produce enough serotonin to keep her focused. Two hours later felt like a good time to stop. Claire dug some dollar bills out of her backpack and placed them into her jacket pocket. She¡¯d set her mind to it on the way in¨Cit wasn¡¯t fair the way homeless people were treated. She walked back a slightly different path, through the lower quad, past a few practicing dance teams, before heading back up towards the main intersection. For the seventh or eighth time since going to college, Claire walked past the largest campus-adjacent cluster of homeless people again, at the intersection in front of the closed CVS. Two had signs out, so for the first time she dropped a dollar bill into each of their tins. One said he was a veteran. She retreated too quickly to process what they said for her¨Cthe adrenaline was just too much. She still jumped when one called after her. A moment later she processed it¨Cjust a short ¡°thanks¡±. The person on the next block catcalled her, and she was glad she didn¡¯t have anything left to give him. By the time she made it back to her dorm room she was relaxed, and the fluttery warmth of having done something good filled her chest. Principles were complicated things, but she would maintain hers. For a moment she¡¯d forgotten about rush entirely. Then she saw the letter waiting on her desk. Adrenaline rushed back through her, and she took two steps back into the hallway. Xia, her roommate, had already gone to visit her parents for the weekend. The RA had promised not to enter their rooms without permission. No one should have been able to get to her desk. She took a look at the window, but then scoffed. They were on the 8th floor. The door didn¡¯t show any signs of being broken, and when she tried closing it and pushing it open she definitely still needed a key to get in. A deep breath settled her nerves slightly, and replaced shock with anger. Someone had violated her space. Nowhere was truly safe. This was just a reminder that her room wasn¡¯t either. She¡¯d be stronger. Claire took her time in removing her shoes and her bag, then picked up the letter. The envelope was blank, but it had to be a bid from one of the sororities. Hopefully Lambda Gamma Kappa. She opened the envelope, took out the paper, and her heart sank. September 3rd, 4:00pm ¡°We¡¯d like to kindly invite you to initiation at Delta Sigma.¡± Fuck. Claire paced in front of the desk as anxiety bloomed. Delta Sigma¡­ they¡¯d been graceful, but Claire had this lingering sense that something deeper and spookier awaited her there, and she found it unsettling. Especially the sisters who had been wearing the masks¨Cthey were completely silent the whole time. Who even did that? And from everything she¡¯d seen they seemed fairly insular, almost cultish. It wasn¡¯t the life as a popular girl she¡¯d dreamed about. Was this really something she should do? Uncertainty, laid to rest when she¡¯d planned out her college life as a new person, a sorority girl, clawed at her again. The anxiety she¡¯d tried to leave behind in high school caught up and ate at her her. The voice of her mother, saying this wasn¡¯t something she could do. What if she was right? She threw herself into the reading for one of her classes, but her mind kept drifting back. She hated herself in those moments. Why couldn¡¯t she be like Zoey? Always put together, always knowing the right thing to do, always liked by those around her? This was losing that popularity contest for student government all over again. But it wasn¡¯t quite that, was it? She hadn¡¯t been rejected from the sorority system entirely, just sorted into a house that was a little strange. She¡¯d just have to join them, be absolutely incredible, and improve their reputation. Lambda Gamma Kappa would regret not choosing her.
III. Introductions
[Week 1.0] Luna spent the next morning getting ready and building up strength. She hadn¡¯t been able to afford laser treatment yet, so she spent a good hour just shaving and moisturizing. She¡¯d found some gaffs on Amazon that made tucking easier, so thankfully that was much less complicated than last year. Hair care was still something she knew very little about, but so far just getting a high-quality shampoo and conditioner had served her straight shoulder length hair pretty well. At the last minute, she decided to reach a little, and tried to tie half of it up in an asymmetric braid. Getting dressed was still¡­ Compared to the beautiful women around her, she felt like an absolute giant. Her shoulders were enormous, she had only the barest suggestions of a chest and her butt might as well have been an ironing board. It was a miracle anyone ever saw her as a girl at all. She dug through her entire wardrobe, tried on a dress, changed her mind, tried on a skirt, changed her mind, tried on a bunch of other things she¡¯d rather not think about. She finally settled on a halter top that made her chest less broad, and a pair of baggy pants to make her lower half less skinny. Just in case she¡¯d bring a sweater. Worst case she could cover up. That left about 30 minutes for makeup. She¡¯d realized over the summer just how much of a difference it made for passing. It wasn¡¯t something she was great at yet, but some foundation and three tries at a wing later and she was ready. Luna headed to the address on the invitation with plenty of time to spare. It was a cute little house on the north side of campus. Probably an auxiliary to wherever their primary space was¨Cshe¡¯d heard rumors about the scale Delta Sigma¡¯s parties last year, and there was no way that they were happening here. She was 5 minutes early, but rang the doorbell anyway. She was greeted by a girl wearing a short black dress and a collar, looking thoroughly blank. Passive eyes stared straight through her, and the sister¡¯s mouth remained neutral, no sign of tension anywhere in the face. Luna stood there for a moment, waiting for instructions, waiting for anything. The story has been taken without consent; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident. There was nothing, just blankness. It reminded her of hypnosis fiction an online friend had once written. Was she in some kind of¨C? No, people didn¡¯t just get isekai¡¯d into hypnosis stories. She tried subtly shifting her head from left and right. Yep, the eyes didn¡¯t track her at all. But what was she supposed to do? Robot-girl looked sort of cute, and so far this whole interaction was more comfortable than trying to awkwardly navigate a door-greeter. She went with it. She walked through the door, and looked for a place to remove her shoes. Just as she finished, someone came out of the living room. She remembered the girl from rush. Medium height, curly hair in the rough shape of a bob, a few freckles. Luna breathed a sigh of relief. She hadn¡¯t ended up in some haunted drone house by mistake. Before she could stress about remembering the name, the sister reintroduced herself. ¡°Hello Luna, I¡¯m Miriam.¡± She made a big open gesture with her hands. ¡°And welcome to my castle.¡± Luna gave her a shy smile. ¡°It certainly looks impressive.¡± Miriam grinned back. ¡°You can take a seat in the living room, we¡¯ll get started in a few minutes.¡± Luna walked through a wide opening in the foyer and into a huge living room. In the center was a set of plush couches surrounding a fireplace. The mahogany furniture made the room feel almost overwhelming, but a smattering of plants and large windows made it cozy instead. A ton of miscellaneous decorations on the wall suggested a rich personal history, spread by the people who lived there. Everything smelled faintly earthy. Luna felt welcome. Three more silent collared sisters stood on the edges of the room, though they seemed less hypnotized than the one by the door. One of them smiled at her. In another place she might have found it jarring. But compared to the door¡­ of course there would be servants on standby, who didn¡¯t have some of those around? Two other new members had already arrived. One had the build of an athlete, tall, even more broad shouldered than Luna¨Cbut somehow making it look good¨Cand enough muscles that she could crush her. She leaned back on one of the couches, legs spread, taking up space, radiating confidence. The other was the picture of queerness. Slight build, pink hair, and it looked like she had a tattoo peeking out from under the sleeve of the top she wore. The only thing her grunge look was missing was a skateboard. A septum piercing completed rounded everything out. Luna spent a moment just admiring how well she embodied her aesthetic. They looked different enough from each other that Luna was a little less worried she was going to be seen as some kind of freak, and being in their company came with a subtle sort of validation. She was being invited to a ¡®sisterhood¡¯. These people saw her as a woman. She gave them each a small wave, which they returned, then settled down on the couches herself, and waited for the introductions to begin.
III. Introductions II
[Week 1.0] They hadn¡¯t specified what to wear, so Claire settled on a top and skirt combo and ankle boots. Fashionable, but practical, and not too formal. She put on her armor¨Cdaytime makeup¨Chyped herself up with some aggressive hip hop, then walked down to the sorority house. Saturday afternoons always left campus a little bit empty, but there were still people sitting in the cafes, completing the first assignments of the semester, or just hanging out on campus. Distantly, she spotted some people practicing for dance auditions. She walked past the cognitive science building on her way to Northside. In a different life it would have been a refuge for her, the place she centered her college experience around. She would have have sat in the labs till late in the night, trying to perfect an assignment. She was glad she¡¯d decided to become someone else. This new version of her was better. When she reached the address on the invitation she spent a moment in awe of just how normal the house was. It was a completely standard free standing victorian. Two stories, a large lawn, and a cute little tower on the right side of the house. The outside had been painted an unassuming brown, and the only thing missing to make it even more perfectly ordinary would have been one of those little public-libraries-in-a-box that dotted west coast residential streets. If this was the sorority house then Claire was going to be incredibly disappointed. Nevermind that¨CDelta Sigma was one of the smaller sororities, but this would fit maybe ten sisters if they weren¡¯t all sleeping in bunks. There had to be something else as well. Or maybe the address was wrong? She double checked the invitation, double checked her map. She was in the right place, so she steeled herself and walked up the steps. There was a cute little plant next to the door, something clearly watered with care. She knocked on the door. A sorority sister greeted her. She wore a black leather choker, a short black dress, and high heels. Her face was entirely expressionless and blank, and she seemed to look straight through Claire. Claire tried to says something. ¡°Hello?¡± No reaction at all. Claire felt a chill run through her. The sister didn¡¯t seem to be aware at all. She tried snapping in front of her eyes, but it did nothing. She tapped her shoulder, still nothing. Claire looked around, unsure what to do. Did she need help? Was this normal? She reached out to shake her, when a voice interrupted her. ¡°Please don¡¯t do that.¡± A girl of medium height¨Cshe reminded Claire oddly the neighbor she¡¯d celebrated Hanukkah with a few times as a child¨Cspoke from the entrance to the living room. It was phrased as a request, but the tone didn¡¯t leave any question that she expected to be obeyed. Claire immediately tensed up, defenses activated. She¡¯d just gotten here, and already she¡¯d slipped up. She needed to draw less attention to herself, keep her guard up more, impress more. ¡°Sorry, I was¨C¡° she made a questioning gesture. The curly haired girl seemed to soften a little. ¡°You¡¯ll understand in time. Please take off your shoes and come to the living room. You¡¯re the last one.¡± She turned around to leave, but then stopped. ¡°My name is Miriam by the way, but you should probably get used to calling me Miss.¡± The living room was large, with an array of couches. There were sisters standing all around the edges. They looked less frozen than the sister who opened the door, but they still radiated an eerie stillness. Claire felt watched, and together with the jungle-y plants the whole space felt small and oppressive. Seven others already sat on the couches. Most shared the wide eyed and somewhat lost look that marked them as freshman joining their first student group. She¡¯d have to make sure to keep that expression off her own face. Confidence. Besides them and the three standing at the wall, there was a professional looking girl carrying a clipboard and wearing an androgynous suit. She looked up as Claire entered, and marked something down. Claire felt immediately on edge about her. Miriam went to stand next to her, pointedly waiting for Claire to find a place to sit. Claire found an open spot next to a tall black-haired girl who seemed friendly enough. The girl waved at her and Claire felt a little more at ease, but before she could weave back Miriam clapped her hands twice. All eyes in the room immediately went to her. Somehow, she¡¯d acquired a white riding crop, which she kept loosely in her left hand. ¡°Alright, now that you¡¯re all here! We can begin.¡± Miriam projected herself across the room, and Claire could feel her taking ownership of the space. ¡°First things first, I want names, optionally pronouns, and something weird about you.¡± Miriam looked to the left and to the right, then, settled on the left-most member, sitting on the couch closest to the window. ¡°Alright,¡± she said with just a hint of levity, ¡°you made the mistake of making eye contact with me, so you get to go first!¡± The new member froze for a second, but then found her bravery. She was tall and fairly skinny, dressed in stylish streetwear, with baggy pants that probably went with a set of fancy boots. She took a deep breath and gifted the room with a confident smile. ¡°My name is Diana, she/her pronouns, and, uhhh¡­¡± She thought for a second. ¡°I once kept a wild raccoon as a pet? Does that count?¡± She looked to Miriam for approval, but didn¡¯t look nervous anymore. Miriam made an exaggerated thoughtful face. ¡°It depends, exactly how long, and did you teach it any cool tricks?¡± Diana grinned. ¡°It could ¡®sit¡¯ and ¡®rollover¡¯, though I didn¡¯t really make it to ¡®stay¡¯. I raised it from birth when I was 10, and actually kept it till 15 before it escaped out into the wild¨Cwe think it still visits sometimes with its new family, but we¡¯re not sure.¡± Miriam gave a thoughtful nod. ¡°Yes, this will do. Next.¡± The tiny girl sitting next to Diana tensed up, but tried putting on a brave face as well. She had brown hair that ran just a bit past her shoulder, with soft, messy looking waves. Less curly than Miriam¡¯s, but shorter and curlier than Claire¡¯s own. Her face made her look young, and her overall impression was a bit mousy. Her outfit was just as unassuming as the rest of her, and she seemed to curl in on herself and make herself as tiny as possible. ¡°My name is Becca.¡± She struggled for a moment. ¡°My pet¨C This content has been misappropriated from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere. ¡°Nope,¡± Miriam interrupted, ¡°pet¡¯s been taken¡± Becca went wide eyed. ¡°Ummm, umm, ummmm¨C¡± She seemed to shrink into herself a little, panicked eyes glancing around the room. After a moment of awkward silence, Miriam spoke again, her voice softer this time. ¡°Let me help you a little. What¡¯s the weirdest porn you¡¯ve watched?¡± Becca blushed a scarlet red, but Miriam looked serious. Seemingly without moving, Miriam got closer to Becca. She was within touching distance now, but it felt supportive instead of harsh, and Miriam seemed somehow smaller. ¡°It¡¯s a simple question, and no one here will judge you for your answer,¡± she said. Becca took a deep breath, then ¡°Ithinkitwassomehentaiaboutlatexanimalsuits¡± Miriam didn¡¯t laugh, didn¡¯t go back to being the massive presence she¡¯d been at the start, didn¡¯t even move. But she visibly relaxed, and radiated a kind of calm satisfaction. She looked into Becca¡¯s eyes. ¡°Good job. I¡¯m proud of you.¡± Becca blushed harder and, seemingly on instinct, leaned into Diana next to her. The taller girl placed an arm around her and made little calming motions on Becca¡¯s left shoulder. Becca relaxed, and Claire felt a confused pang of longing. Then Miriam slowly raised herself back up, went back to her spot in the circle, and gradually seemed to take up more space again. Her crop pointed at the group. ¡°Alright, Becca did great for not knowing,¡± she said, ¡°but the rest of you: no subjects someone else went with. This isn¡¯t supposed to be easy.¡± The next person in line was tall and built like a rugby player. She had a college athletics sweater lying next to her as well, but had dressed up in a button down shirt and slacks for this occasion. ¡°My name is Riga, she/her pronouns,¡± she said, ¡°and I once broke open a watermelon with my thighs.¡± Miriam nodded, a serious and solemn expression on her face. ¡°That definitely counts. Touch¨¦.¡± She looked at the next person, a lanky girl wearing a crop top and a skirt with knee socks. Neon magenta hair and a choker completed the ensemble. ¡°Mmmmmm.¡± She looked thoughtful for a moment. ¡°My name is Persephone, though you can call me Perse. She/they pronouns, and I once hooked up with a girl I just met at a punk show in a nearby skatepark.¡± ¡°Nope,¡± was all Miriam said. Her expression hadn¡¯t changed, but Claire froze on Perse¡¯s behalf. Persephone¡¯s expression was a mixture between shock and embarrassment. ¡°Why?? That¡¯s way more than either of the others admitted.¡± Miriam¡¯s face stayed perfectly neutral. ¡°Because that wasn¡¯t hard for you. Try again.¡± There as a slight pause. But then Miriam continued. ¡°I also don¡¯t appreciate whining,¡± she added, ¡°so unless you want to be the first one to find out what happens to new members who disappoint me¡­¡± Persephone jerked back, tensed up, then let out a deep shuddering breath. ¡°My mother used to get violent with my father. When I was a child it scared me¡­¡± she began, ¡°but as I got older¡­ it became weirdly fascinating. Sometimes I would watch.¡± There was a moment of stunned silence from the other new members, but Miriam gave a Cheshire Cat smile, before softening slightly and brushing Persephone¡¯s leg with her crop. ¡°Good girl,¡± she intoned, ¡°your vulnerability is carried here.¡± Persephone blushed at that, but seemed comfortable enough. Claire, on the other hand, was starting to get stressed. She felt a confusing feeling in her stomach¡­ She wasn¡¯t sure exactly what was happening¡­ but something inside her screamed danger. There was one last person squeezed at the end of the far couch, sitting on top of the armrest like she owned the place. She was short, dressed in clearly expensive clothing, and had short, asymmetrical hair with an undercut. The confidence she radiated was absolutely infectious, and she grinned as she gave her answer. ¡°My name is Arie, and I once tortured a squirrel to death.¡± Somehow, Miriam¡¯s face didn¡¯t even twitch, and the unhinged master of ceremonies stayed perfectly on beat. ¡°That¡¯s really nice, did you also want to share your pronouns?¡± Arie blinked, probably expecting, for good reason, a larger reaction. ¡°Uhhh, they/them, though she/her is okay?¡± Miriam looked at her assistant for a second. Claire had forgotten all about her, and in a deeply unsettling moment Claire realized that every Delta Sigma sister besides Miriam had been perfectly still since they started introductions, with the assistant twitching her head only ever so slightly up and down as she scribbled notes. ¡°Neha,¡± Miriam asked, ¡°how many people do you know in the house that have tortured small animals?¡± Neha finally looked up from her clipboard. ¡°That I know of, ma¡¯am, or would you like an estimate?¡± ¡°Sure,¡± Miriam replied, ¡°give me an estimate.¡± ¡°I¡¯d say somewhere between 4 and 7, ma¡¯am,¡± Neha answered. Miriam looked back at Arie. ¡°There, now you can stop trying to impress me, and we can move on.¡± The round moved to her couch, and the person on it nearest to Arie spoke up. She was a bit taller but still pretty short, with long black hair and a style that screamed Southern California. ¡°My name is Jenny, I use she/her pronouns, and something strange about me¡­¡± Despite having so much time to prepare, she seemed to struggle. ¡°I have a third nipple.¡± Miriam broke out in mirthful laughter at that. ¡°The biology copout! I love it.¡± The only other person who laughed was Persephone. Claire felt too off-balance¨Cand the other new members probably did as well. The active sisters were either not in the mood or¨Ccould they even laugh? The perfectly still, almost drones at the wall? Every time she thought about them again Claire felt more and more unsettled. If the lack of laughter bothered Miriam she didn¡¯t show it at all, instead she waved to the next person with a lingering grin. The girl next to her spoke up. ¡°My name is Luna,¡± she said, ¡°and a weird thing about me is that I¡¯m trans.¡± Everyone flinched as Miriam slapped the wall behind her with her riding crop. ¡°No. Absolutely not.¡± She took a step towards Luna and Claire, stepped her right right foot onto the long, low coffee table between all the couches. Her riding crop touched Luna¡¯s chin. ¡°That does NOT make you weird here, and if I have to beat that out of you, I will do so with all the love and violence and affection in the world.¡± ¡°Okay.¡° Luna looked stunned at first, then seemed to sink into the couch a little. ¡°Okay.¡± She was suddenly much more relaxed¨CClaire hadn¡¯t realized just how tense the girl had been. ¡°My name is Luna, and every night I sleep with a stuffed shark from Ikea.¡± The crop disappeared, and Miriam gave Luna a beaming smile. ¡°Verrry good,¡± she purred, ¡°but that said, Neha?¡± ¡°Two,¡± the assistant said. No one explained what two meant. Instead, the focus shifted to Claire. ¡°Alright last one,¡± Miriam said. Claire wasn¡¯t ready for all eyes on the room to be on her. Especially as the answers kept getting weirder and weirder. Whatever she¡¯d expected joining a sorority to be like, it wasn¡¯t¡­ this bizarre. ¡°My name is Claire, I use she/her pronouns, and something weird about me¡­¡± She felt exposed, but she needed to offer up something juicy enough that Miriam would accept it, but also something that would make her look good. ¡°I once hooked up with a boy in a school closet.¡± Claire¡¯s heart pounded, but Miriam looked unimpressed. She¡¯d already been leaning towards Claire, but now she placed an elbow on her knee and leant her head onto her palm. She wasn¡¯t actually that close, but Claire still felt as if she was right up in her personal space. ¡°Claire Moretti,¡± she drawled, ¡°quiz bowl state finalist, president of the bridge competition, and two time failed candidate for class Vice President. Presumably here trying to turn over a new leaf.¡± Claire was frozen in terror, but Miriam continued. ¡°Claire, Claire, Claire, I asked you for vulnerability, and you¡¯re honestly going to walk in here and tell me about a sexual conquest?¡± she asked, her tone sickly sweet. ¡°Try again.¡± Claire panicked a little, until suddenly a hand was on her shoulder. She almost jumped. One of the silent sisters had come over from the wall, and she standing behind the couch, looking down at her. For a moment Claire felt like prey, but the smile on the sister¡¯s face was so gentle Claire couldn¡¯t help but relax. The hand on her shoulder began exerting gentle pressure, almost like one half of a shoulder massage. Somehow, it made things a little easier. She took a deep breath. She could do this, she could control herself and she could answer the questions. Claire closed her eyes, then spoke. ¡°I once cheated on a math test.¡± There was silence, and Claire opened one eye. Miriam looked amused, but approving. ¡°You get one too,¡± she spoke softly, ¡°good girl.¡± The warmth that erupted deep in Claire¡¯s chest somehow made everything worse. What was going on here?
III. Introductions III [Week 1.0] Miriam went back to the center. The hand on Claire¡¯s shoulder gave her one last squeeze, then disappeared. ¡°Alright everyone!¡± Miriam continued the introductions, ¡°Now that we know a little more about each other, it¡¯s time for the consent conversation.¡± Neha handed Miriam a notecard, which their ringleader regularly glanced at. ¡°First, some basics. Should you agree to join, from here on I and the other senior members will control every little detail of your lives. You so much as want to masturbate, you get our permission first.¡± Claire glanced around the room. No one was moving a muscle. It sounded¡­ kind of like one of those crazy movie sororities? She tried to imagine Miriam with straight blond hair, telling her she could only have sex with dudes from Alpha Beta Kappa. This wasn¡¯t too far out from what she had signed up for? ¡°There will be physical aspects to this. None of them will be outside of the hazing you might expect at another institution on this campus.¡± Yeah, exactly! ¡°There will be mental aspects to this. They will be unlike anything you would experience anywhere else. We think you will be compatible with these, and our track record on being right about that is pretty good. But It¡¯s a lot.¡± Miriam paused and looked around the room. ¡°There are other aspects to this, which I won¡¯t be able to reveal until you¡¯re further along the process. They will significantly impact your life.¡± Claire looked around as Miriam continued. Every other eye in the room was on the pledge master, except for the silent sisters. They were watching the new members. One made eye contact with Claire, and she quickly turned her focus back to Miriam. ¡°We will expect your vulnerability, your obedience. We will change you, though into something you will be proud of.¡± She put down the note card. ¡°We will take care of you.¡± Claire felt that feeling in her stomach again, the same one she¡¯d felt when Persephone had introduced herself. The anxiety came with it. Miriam¡¯s tone softened a little. ¡°Know that this will be one of the hardest things you¡¯ve ever done. It will change you. But we¡¯ll be with you every step of the way.¡± Suddenly she left the assembly of couches, and headed to a desk off to the side of the room. She very visibly took out her cellphone. ¡°Now, we¡¯re waiting for a delivery before we continue this. You have about 15 minutes. If you don¡¯t want to continue, feel free to get up and leave. Otherwise, get to know each other¨Cthere will be a quiz later.¡± She looked down at her phone, apparently losing interest in the new members entirely. There was a moment of silence as the new members stared at each other. Claire swore she could have heard a pin drop. Then, silently, Jenny got up, reached for her purse, put on her jacket, and left. Should Claire follow her? This was her chance to join a sorority. Her chance to leave the past behind and become somebody new. They seemed kind of intense, but they promised to make somebody new out of her. Should she? Could she? It scared her¨Cshe shouldn¡¯t let someone have this much power over her. But the alternative was failure. Could she? She should go, it wasn¡¯t safe, there¡¯d¨Canother hand on her shoulder pulled her back into the present. Arie was looking down at her. ¡°So, what do you think so far?¡± They asked. The rest of the world seemed to fade away a little. They were radiating that confidence again. Claire managed to tear her eyes away and glance around. ¡°It¡¯s, umm,¡± Claire whispered, ¡°it¡¯s a lot?¡± Arie stayed nonchalant. ¡°Yeah, you got bullied pretty hard. It was kind of cute.¡± Claire blushed again. ¡°Actually, I was thinking of¡­¡± Arie was looking at her with that smile again. This was her chance wasn¡¯t it? She would not let fear ruin this. She would be strong. She would overcome. Diana, Becca, and Riga had formed a group, and Luna and Persephone had turned towards each. No one else was leaving. She wouldn¡¯t be so weak. Not in front of the rodent killer with the charming smile. Might as well go straight for the elephant then. ¡°Yeah¡­ you admitted to the squirrel thing though. What was that all about?¡± she asked. Arie shrugged. ¡°It seemed like the kind of thing they wanted to know. Show they couldn¡¯t cow me and stuff. It was dying anyway, and I exaggerated for Miriam. It¡¯s no big deal.¡± Claire felt confused for a moment, but the answer made enough sense. She decided to change the subject. ¡°So, ummm, what brings you here?¡± Arie smiled that confident smirk again. ¡°I wanted to join a sorority, and Delta Sigma has this reputation for being crazy intense and exclusive and weird.¡± Well, here was someone who was clearly better informed than Lisa about what Delta Sigma would be like. She glanced at the door, maybe she should st¨C she pushed the feeling back into its box. Arie politely didn¡¯t say anything, although their eyes had flickered with her glance. Claire needed something new to say. ¡°Huh, so this was your first choice?¡± she asked. ¡°There¡¯s only seven of us, Claire! Most of the other houses are twenty or more,¡± Arie pointed out, ¡°this is definitely special.¡± They seemed so relaxed and confident. It spread to Claire as well, and she leaned back for the first time since arriving at the house on Northside. The couch was soft at her back, the world wasn¡¯t that scary. ¡°I guess, if this isn¡¯t even the main house that¡¯s also kind of cool,¡± she said, ¡°I definitely imagined doing something more normal though.¡± ¡°Normal is for normal people. Look, I did the whole popularity thing in high school, and it¡¯s great, I loved the admiration, but it¡¯s also a little boring after a while.¡± They leaned in close. ¡°Plus you should see the Delta Sig alumni network, it¡¯s unbelievable.¡± Claire laughed for the first time since getting her invitation. ¡°What do you think they¡¯ll quiz us about?¡± Arie looked thoughtful. ¡°We should start with biography? If they ask us about intimate secrets or random facts there¡¯s really too much ground to cover in 20 minutes.¡± Claire considered for a moment. It seemed like a good approach. Safe. Arie looked at her silently with that intense gaze. It only took a second before she caved and talked first. This narrative has been purloined without the author''s approval. Report any appearances on Amazon. ¡°Alright, well, my name is Claire, and I¡¯m a freshman from the outer Bay Area studying cognitive science. I, uhh, like fantasy stories and kpop. I have a younger sibling who I¡¯ve spent a lot of time taking care of, and a dad who¡¯s currently getting treatment for cancer. I, uhh, well Miriam already talked about what I did in high school.¡± She felt the old shame well up inside and looked anywhere but Arie. Arie smiled that smile again and it eased the pain a little. ¡°Lets see, I ran a homelessness activism organization in Massachusetts in high school, was class president and did some other things in student government. In my free time, I like poetry and non fiction books, and sometimes I play the piano. Though we¡¯ll see how I can continue that here.¡± They looked over Claire¡¯s head. ¡°Lets get the others into this.¡± Persephone and Luna turned around, and Arie somehow brought them into the circle with just their presence. Claire felt a pang of envy. She needed to learn to be a central figure herself. Persephone waved first. ¡°Hey, y¡¯all already know my name, I¡¯m studying mechanical engineering. I¡¯m from the Seattle area.¡± Luna glanced around, got the same look from Arie. ¡°I¡¯m Luna, I¡¯m studying computer science, and I¡¯m from Mountain View in the South Bay.¡± The established pair spent a moment repeating their self-descriptions, before they collectively went back to strategizing. Persephone ideated first. ¡°I think it could be childhood hobbies. I did a lot of skateboarding, for what it¡¯s worth.¡± ¡°I built a bunch of websites,¡± Luna chimed in, ¡°neopets and things like that.¡± She turned to Arie. ¡°Did you really torture that squirrel?¡± Arie looked just a smidge annoyed. ¡°It really wasn¡¯t such a huge deal¨Cit was old and I was curious.¡± Their sharp tone sent Luna into a defensive curl. She wasn¡¯t the tallest girl but in that moment she looked positively small. Claire almost curled up in sympathy, but she needed to keep the peace. ¡°Neha said herself, it¡¯s pretty common¡­¡± she tried. ¡°I don¡¯t thin¨C¡° Luna started, but got cut off by a touch from Persephone. ¡°Lets talk about other things,¡± Perse redirected the conversation. ¡°We need to get childhood hobbies from the others, and see what they came up with. I don¡¯t think this is the sort of quiz we want to fail.¡± Diana, Becca, and Riga ended up being into hiking, crochet, and sports respectively. ¡°Unsurprising¡± as Arie described it. They didn¡¯t get much further before the doorbell rang and one of the silent servants collected Miriam¡¯s package. Miriam strode back to the center of the room and opened it on the coffee table. The box was filled with nearly identical cuffs and chokers. They looked like the ones that everyone in Delta Sigma seemed to wear, but white instead of black. Just like the ones existing members wear, these were incredibly thin, made of something that looked like leather. The cuff could be mistaken for a bracer-type fashion accessory, and the choker was, well, a choker. ¡°Alright everyone, I¡¯m going to give you each one of these. They mean slightly different things. As you¡¯ve probably noticed there¡¯s two types of members of Delta Sigma. Some of us are ¡®minders¡¯, the rest are ¡®servants¡¯. You¡¯ll learn more about the implications of that today and throughout the semester.¡± Miriam picked up the box as she continued. ¡°If you get a cuff, you¡¯re a minder. If you get a collar, you¡¯re a servant. This can change with time, if you grow, or change, or if I am wrong. But you won¡¯t grow or change in one semester, and I am not wrong.¡± The pledge master gave everyone a penetrating look. ¡°So accept it and make your peace with it. There¡¯s really nothing wrong with either.¡± Claire took a breath as she understood. They weren¡¯t chokers. They were collars. The girls standing at the walls were some kind of slave. She felt herself panic a little even as something in her chest tangled up. Miriam gave the box to Neha¨Cwho was apparently a slave, forced to be a near-silent admin assistant by the collar around her throat¨Cand walked to the end of the room, opposite of Claire. She rummaged in the box, and came out with a white cuff. She opened it and began placing it on Diana¡¯s left wrist. ¡°Potential servants will address me and any other minder with respect. Either miss or ma¡¯am or mx are acceptable, though some minders, particularly the non-binary ones, will ask you to use something else. You will remember, or be punished. You should assume miss or mx for for any servants with black chokers as well, though most will permit you to drop the formality or use something else entirely. ¡° Diana complete, Miriam, with Neha at her side, walked one step down to Becca. She rummaged briefly, coming out with a choker. ¡°Neha here, for example, will ¡®miss¡¯ everyone in the house except the pets, and that will include al¨C¡° she glanced at Neha for a second, getting some kind of subtle confirmation, ¡°¨Cmost of you.¡± Becca didn¡¯t even look up. She just took a deep breath, pulled her hair out of the way, and allowed Miriam to place the choker on her. Miriam and Neha took a step over, continuing the ritual. ¡°Potential servants will listen to the commands and instructions of anyone not a potential servant themselves. They will ask permission before sitting on furniture. When eating with members above their rank, they will serve them, by getting them food and waiting to eat until they¡¯ve started. Potential servants will not eat dessert with their meals. And yes, this includes sugary non-juice drinks.¡± Riga smiled, relaxed and confident, as she got a cuff. Of course. ¡°They will submit a calendar for their weekly schedule, and get modifications and approval, generally from Neha but eventually from others. Potential minders will submit calendars as well, and will discuss their schedules with me.¡± They halted again in front of Persephone, who froze like a deer staring into headlights. She looked scared, but there was an undercurrent of nervous excitement. Miriam started rummaging in the crate, picked something up, then glanced at Persephone again and changed her mind. When her hand came out, it revealed a white choker-collar. The future servant gave a resigned nod and leant forward. The tension left her body as Miriam wrapped the collar around her. Claire wondered briefly what she wanted. She couldn¡¯t possibly wear a collar like that, could she? She¡¯d worked too hard to be strong. And she WAS strong, her life had demonstrated that. She¡¯d get a cuff for sure. ¡°Understand that my wording here has been very deliberate. People in Delta Sigma communicate very carefully, both explicitly and in subtext, and it is crucial for your success that you learn this as fast as possible. Those of you with the right childhood trauma might find this easier than others.¡± She walked up to Luna. Luna just smiled, briefly making eye contact before looking down and stretching her neck. Miriam gave her a slight brush through her hair, then reached into the box and grabbed a cho¨Ccollar. She placed it gently, almost reverently around the freshman¡¯s neck. She made it somehow look easy, graceful, loving, and Claire¡¯s anxiety reached its peak. ¡°All potential members, regardless of status, are expected to follow the instructions of full members in an emergency. All will meet with me and Neha each once a week. All will work on their deportment and the general norms and behaviors we expect from members. We strongly encourage each of you to get a therapist.¡± Claire looked at Miriam, fear quickly replaced by determination. She gave Miriam her left hand. Miriam just frowned. She turned for a moment, making eye contact with Neha. Neha blinked once, but gave no other visible sign of communication. But Miriam seemed to see something anyway because her expression hardened. She reached into the box¡­ ¡­and pulled out a white collar. Claire¡¯s heart raced, but she was too paralyzed to do anything. She was in a daze as Miriam ever so gently brushed her hair out of the way, placed her other hand on the cheek and held her in place. Claire felt herself drift into the touch, even as the other hand left and grabbed the collar. It felt heavy as Miriam placed it around her neck. It felt constricting as Miriam let go of her hair and tightened it. It felt final as the buckle closed. A second and an eternity later Miriam took a step back and walked over to Arie. Claire¡¯s wrist was still extended in unfulfilled expectation, and the embarrassment was almost overwhelming. As if to rub it in Arie did the same thing, placed her wrist out just as Claire had. And instead of grabbing a collar Miriam just shook her head, grabbed a cuff, and closed it. Arie grinned, and Claire felt her shame rise over her with the force of an incoming tide. But what the fuck was she to do? She froze. Miriam spoke again. ¡°There¡¯s more, but you¡¯ll find it out during your individual sessions with me or during group lessons. For now expect to spend most afternoons each week here. Like I said, time away, time doing homework, time spent eating and sleeping, all of those will require permission from now on.¡± Claire barely internalized the words. She still couldn¡¯t move. ¡°You¡¯ll get more wiggle room as a potential minder,¡± Miriam continued, ¡°but know that I¡¯m still required to teach you, and I will not be prevented from doing that.¡± Claire gingerly touched the collar around her neck with her right hand. It felt so tight, oppressive. This was supposed to be her four years to grow into herself, and grow into the kind of shining success she admired. Now she¡¯d been collared, basically a slave. How could she have fallen so low? ¡°Alright everyone, you¡¯re free to get dinner together, then we¡¯ll continue our evening!¡± No, she was strong, she¡¯d push through. Claire got up. She would rise above. IV. First Evening [Week 1.0] Luna fingered the collar around her neck as the group walked back to campus. It was tight, comforting, a reminder that she belonged to something now. The prospect of discussing her schedule, things as intimate as her grooming habits or her electrolysis sessions or laser appointments, it all terrified her a little, but if they demanded she expose herself, they couldn¡¯t really hate what they found, could they? At worst they¡¯d change it. And Miriam had made it violently clear already that her being transgender would not be an issue. She hoped she could live up to what they wanted her to become. Their little group finally reached the cafeteria, and everyone swiped their meal cards. Luna followed Diana in, then realized too late that she was had led them to the women¡¯s restroom. Luna froze. Diana kept walking, but then turned around halfway through door. She started at Luna, puzzlement showing in her eyes. ¡°Didn¡¯t you have to go?¡± the cis girl asked. Luna shook her head. There was no way she was going to enter a public women¡¯s restroom. ¡°I¡¯m fine, thank you.¡± Diana shrugged and walked into the bathroom. Luna awkwardly browsed Twitter on her phone while she waited. Fortunately Diana didn¡¯t ask any question when she came out, and they walked back to the cafeteria without further incident. Luna wasn¡¯t exactly sure how to act here. Miriam had made it clear she needed to let Diana eat first, but was she supposed to serve her food? Two trays would be difficult to carry but she could do it? She resolved to just let Diana take the lead. The future minder picked up her own tray, so Luna just went along with it. That¡¯s what she was supposed to do, right? Go along with things? The only instruction they¡¯d received regarding food was no more sugar-y deserts for potential servants¨Cpotential minders got to eat whatever they wanted. Luna got herself a meal that looked mostly-healthy, then followed Diana back to the table. Their bathroom detour hadn¡¯t taken long, and they caught up with the rest of the group just as they gathered at a large enough table. Luna waited a moment for the potential minders among them, Riga, Diana, and Arie, to chose seats, mindful of needing to ask for permission to use furniture. On the way over she¡¯d owrried that waiting for permission would feel awkward, but now it was just nice that she didn¡¯t need to initiate. If it was awkward, one of the future minders would say something. She expected the other potential servants to do the same. Instead, just as the minders were about to sit down, Claire grabbed the nearest chair and sat first. There was a moment of silence as everyone¡¯s gears spun out. Claire had, less than an hour after being ordered to obedience, asked the most important question: ¡®or else?¡¯ And it was clear no one had prepared for it. Luna was both impressed by the determination and a little dumbfounded at the aggression. Diana found her words first. ¡°Aren¡¯t you supposed to ask?¡± Luna could have cut the tension with a knife. But she didn¡¯t want to cut anything¨Cshe wanted to disappear. Claire¡¯s shoulders looked tense, but the shake of her head was dismissive. ¡°It¡¯s dumb, and I¡¯m not doing it, especially not in public.¡± Diana looked helplessly over at Arie, then at Riga on the other side of the table. Arie¡¯s face made it absolutely clear that she didn¡¯t care one way or the other. Riga shrugged. There was another moment of awkward silence as Diana realized she was alone in this. Gradually, like a pack of embarrassed wolves, the minders took their seats themselves. Persephone spoke up, looking down at Riga next to her. ¡°May we sit down miss?¡± Relief flooded Luna when Riga nodded. ¡°You all may.¡± With considerably less hesitation, Persephone, Luna, and Becca joined the seated group. Persephone ended up between Riga and Becca. Arie and Luna made up the other end, sitting just on the opposite side of the long table. Claire sat at the corner, and Diana took up the head of the table between her and Becca. Arie began eating as everybody else got settled, and Claire, Riga, and Diana dug in as well. There was another moment of hesitation between the remaining servants. Luna decided she could take the initiative this time. She turned to Arie. ¡°May we begin eating, mx?¡± They gave her a look that was definitely dismissive. ¡°You don¡¯t need to ask us to eat. You¡¯re permitted once we¡¯ve started.¡± They¡¯d barely even looked up from their food. A shiver ran down Luna¡¯s spine¨Cshe¡¯d done something wrong, and been chastised for it. Arie must hate her. But she pulled herself together and began eating herself. Diana¡¯s apologetic smile helped soothe some of her feelings. The dinner conversation was muted. Everyone was still processing their first house meeting, and processing it with the people who they had just been placed above or below felt strange. Becca found the courage to break the silence. ¡°What do¨C¡± Her eyes remained stuck to her food. ¡°What do you all think this means?¡± Riga put down her fork. ¡°It sounds like¡­ we are sort of in charge of you? Or at least we will be, later on.¡± ¡°Weird structure for a sorority,¡± Persephone said. ¡°Yeah,¡± Arie smirked, ¡±but it seems kind of fun.¡± Claire snorted. ¡°Easy for you to say. You get to boss others around. You lucked out.¡± To Luna¡¯s surprise it was Becca who contradicted her. ¡°I¨C I actually prefer this? I think? The servants today looked so confident, and they didn¡¯t have to talk.¡± ¡°I¡¯m kind of sad I didn¡¯t get a cuff,¡± Persephone said, ¡°but even though it¡¯s weird this is also all just kind of cool? Like, the whole concept is sort of radical.¡± Riga looked up from her food again. ¡°How so?¡± She asked. Her slight nordic accent gave the question extra weight. Persephone looked at a painting on the far wall for a moment, gathering her thoughts. ¡°I mean, they all seem to sort of rely on each other in a deep way? I don¡¯t know if you guys made it to their rush event, but they¡¯re all constantly on the same page. And the way Neha and Miriam communicate with barely even a glance? You can¡¯t tell me you don¡¯t want to be able to do that.¡± Arie chimed in again, a predatory smile on their face. ¡°What she¡¯s not admitting is that she thinks it¡¯s hot.¡± Persephone blushed a deep red and hid her face in her food. She seemed to lean towards Riga almost automatically, and Luna felt an unexplained moment of envy. ¡°It kind of is, though?¡± Diana stepped to her defense. ¡°Like something about it¡­¡± She started to move a hand toward¡¯s Becca¡¯s neck, then seemed to catch herself and stop. ¡°Something about it just feels sort of compelling?¡± Luna tried to make sure her voice was in the right register. Big groups still made her nervous, and she didn¡¯t want these people to stop treating her like one of them. ¡°It seems like they care about us at least? They seemed¡­ well¡­ really nice about my stuff, you know?¡± She kicked herself a little for the hesitation. ¡°Yeah, at least they¡¯re not transphobic.¡± Claire¡¯s voice betrayed her continued frustration. ¡°But they¡¯re definitely bullies. They were super mean.¡± Diana and Arie sort of glared at her, still annoyed by Claire¡¯s earlier disobedience, but Riga nodded her head. ¡°You definitely got it worse than the others, I am not sure why.¡± The acknowledgement seemed to mollify Claire a little, and the conversation quickly moved to the sorts of things Luna expected a group of mostly freshman would normally talk about. They established that Luna and Diana were both studying computer science, though Claire¡¯s cognitive science and industrial engineering dual major was a similar set of coursework. Arie was studying economics, Riga environmental science, and Persephone and Becca were studying Mechanical and Civil engineering. To Luna¡¯s relief, Riga was also a sophomore, though none of the others were. The tension around their new roles quickly dissipated into typical college dinner conversation. By the time they walked back Luna felt at least a little bit more settled. No one in the cohort had been outwardly mean to her, and that made her feel safe-ish for now. They all cleared their dishes, though Persephone had thought to take Diana¡¯s for her, and left the cafeteria with plenty of time to get back to Northside. As they walked, Luna wondered what would happen when they got back, and remembered something. She stopped walking. ¡°Guys, wasn¡¯t that mindless girl at the entrance also a servant?¡± Everyone stopped to look at her. She immediately wanted to curl in on herself. She shouldn¡¯t have said anything. Claire immediately scowled. Becca radiated anxiety. Arie and Riga both looked unsurprised¨CArie carried the expression as a sort of ¡®duh¡¯, while Riga¡¯s face showed more patience for the rest of the group. Persephone looked to Diana, and Diana reached a hand toward¡¯s Becca¡¯s shoulder. If you find this story on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the infringement. ¡°Ummm, you don¡¯t think that will happen to us?¡± Becca asked quietly. ¡°Neha and the girls on the walls were also servants,¡± Persephone said. ¡°Clearly there¡¯s some range, right?¡± Diana pulled her into a sideways hug. ¡°I¡¯m sure it¡¯ll be fine. They promised to take care of us.¡± There really wasn¡¯t much more to say. They kept walking. It was dark when they reached the house on Northside, just before the 8pm deadline. Luna sighed inwardly¨Cshe still had homework to work on after this, and she couldn¡¯t imagine they wouldn¡¯t schedule something for Sunday as well. Miriam and Neha were waiting for them as they entered the front door. Miriam lounged sideways on a plush armchair, while Neha stood next to her with her clipboard. This time only two of the silent collared servants stood against the wall. Luna paid more attention to them now. For all she knew she would be like them soon. Their uniforms had looked the same at first glance, but when she looked now she saw that they each had some personal touches. They both wore button-down shirts that gave them a butler vibe, and they each wore a short cropped jacket over it. The jackets were individualized, though, each cut to flatter their figure. They both wore black pants, but the one closer to the door had hers fitted more at the waist, while the one near the kitchen had hers riding lower. One was wearing a charm bracelet with a little lock on it. The other had a small scabbed over cut on her left cheek. Their little group finished shuffling in, and Luna realized she wasn¡¯t sure what to do next. The future minders had all sat down on the couches. The rest stood awkwardly for a moment. Even Claire seemed to have lost her former bravery. Persephone rolled her eyes. ¡°Miss Miriam,¡± she spoke, ¡°may we sit on the couches?¡± Miriam glanced up from her phone. ¡°Watch your tone, but good girl for asking. You may sit on the couch, the rest of you may not.¡± Claire looked like she was about to say something, but Miriam raised an eyebrow. The troublemaker backed down, and sat on the floor by the armrest closest to the door. Luna picked the same couch she¡¯d sat on earlier, and sat in front of her old spot. Luna tried to analyze her own feelings. Sitting on the floor made it all so much more real. She¡¯d kind of automatically gone along with things. It still felt mostly comfortable? Something about it was natural and she wasn¡¯t sure if it was just the authority that Miriam exuded. Maybe it was because Miriam seemed to like her, and clearly didn¡¯t see her as something weird or spectacular or ¡®so brave.¡¯ Following along was just an easy default. Or maybe Diana was right and it was just kind of hot. Miriam waited until 8pm exactly to begin things again. She righted herself in a single fluid motion, then tapped her crop on the coffee table. ¡°Alright everyone, it¡¯s quiz time.¡± There was a collective groan. Luna¡¯s anxiety spiked a fraction. Miriam looked around the group, total seriousness on her face. ¡°So, which one of you had the most physically violent parents?¡± Luna saw her shock at the question mirrored in everyone else in the room. Becca actually gasped. Miriam ignored it. ¡°Hmmm, no takers?¡± she went on, ¡°alright, who had the most physically violent community?¡± Everyone was still staring at each other. This was not ¡®childhood hobbies¡¯. Luna looked at Arie and saw that she, and maybe Riga, were the only ones not horrified. If anything Riga was even smiling. Arie looked hungry and defiant. ¡°Still no takers?¡± Miriam continued, ¡°What about: Who among you was the most emotionally neglected?¡± Luna shivered, this was starting to hit a bit close to home. Her parents hadn¡¯t exactly beaten her, but they definitely didn¡¯t approve of her at all. She was studying engineering, but having trans kids was something that happened to other families¨Cit was barely even a concept her parents understood, much less one that they could accept. She was a source of shame, and even while keeping it a secret, knowing that had made for a difficult childhood. Miriam finally paused. When she continued, it was quieter, calmer, but still deathly serious. ¡°These are the things you need to understand about each other to succeed in Delta Sigma. Either as minders or as servants.¡± Miriam waited, but no one made a peep. When it became clear no one would say anything, the pledgemaster dragged her crop across the table. ¡°Without understanding them, about others and about yourself,¡± Miriam continued, ¡°you will hurt, harm, and even potentially traumatize the people around you. Your unwillingness to wade through the social awkwardness and get to know each other deeply today has now made this more likely.¡± The silence in the room felt almost oppressive, and Luna felt paralyzed in her spot. Not even Arie or Riga were smiling now. Miriam relaxed just an inch. ¡°I understand that you all will struggle with this vulnerability for now. But by the end of this semester I expect you to learn it. Both with each other and with your older siblings.¡± Suddenly her whole demeanor changed, brightened, and she clapped her hands twice. ¡°Alright! It¡¯s time for your first history lesson. We¡¯re going to go out into the yard, and Allyson will tell you a little about where we come from. We expect you all to memorize it.¡± Luna looked around and saw she wasn¡¯t the only one suffering from emotional whiplash. The group got herded like little class-segregated ducklings onto a wooden deck in the backyard, where there were three simple chairs set up for the potential/future minders and four pillows laid out in front of them for the servants. There was a brief awkward moment as everyone had to implicitly choose seating preferences. In the end the minders chose chairs first and everyone else vaguely sat in front of people they felt comfortable with. Or at least, Luna sat in front of Diana and next to Persephone because Diana had seemed very safe at lunch, and Persephone seemed kind as well. Becca ended up pulling her pillow to share Riga with Persephone, leaving Claire with Arie. As usual, Claire seemed to be the least comfortable, and Luna briefly racked her brain for anything she could do about it. But she was on the other side of the seating assignment. She considered giving her a hug later, but who would want that from her disgusting testosterone mutilated body? Better to hold back and not risk violating someone¡¯s personal space. Instead she turned to watch the presentation. Someone had set up a projector screen on the other side of the deck. The entire wooden deck was decorated with fairy lights, giving the occasion a warm, relaxed atmosphere. The coastal air was a little bit chilly, but the skies were clear and she could make out a gorgeous full moon. Someone had set up one of those restaurant space heaters above them, but it was off so far. A pile of blankets sat nearby, and Luna grabbed one and wrapped it around herself. Allyson turned out to be the servant who had put her hands on Claire¡¯s shoulder during the introductory questions, the one without the cut. Now that Luna properly paid attention to her, she was tall and muscular with a small tattoo under her left ear. She carried herself with the same grace as as all the other collar-wearing-servants, and Luna still found it impressive. Despite being a servant, Allyson stood at the front of the group with confidence and poise, and when she started presenting, she dominated the area almost as Miriam did . The servant clicked forward the powerpoint. ¡°Delta Sigma started in 1906 at this very university, originally as a solidarity organization for women involved in the suffrage movement. We started small, with just six members, but by the time women got the right to vote in 1920, we were at 30 sisters¡± She clicked to the next slide. ¡°In the 1910s, during the First World War, Delta Sigma participated in a campaign to¡­¡± As Allyson droned on about the utterly typical history of Delta Sigma as a sorority, Luna started to get a bit sore. Sitting cross-legged on a pillow with a straight back was actually rather exhausting, especially with no support on her back. She tried to stretch without being noticed, then continued listening. ¡°¡­and then in 1974 we acquired this house on the north side of campus as a retreat and event space. The main house was renovated a decade later to bring things up to more modern earthquake standards, though an additional renovation happened in 2005¡­¡± A few minutes of relatively mundane history later and Luna suddenly felt pressure on her back and flinched forward. She¡¯d leaned back without noticing. She turned and gave Diana an apologetic look, then tried to pay attention to the presentation. ¡°¡­formally accepted trans and non-binary members in 2005, though there¡¯s records of them existing long before then¨C¡° Luna realized she was leaning back again, turned to apologize, only for Diana to place a gentle hand on her shoulder and guide her back against her leg. It was so small. Such a tiny gesture of acceptance, but what it meant¨Cthat Diana felt safe with her, that she wasn¡¯t rejected, that she might belong¨Cit was almost too much. Luna managed to keep herself to some watery eyes and a few silent tears as Allyson droned on. The rest of the presentation was interesting, but nothing particularly noteworthy. It made Delta Sigma sound incredibly normal, and given that just her first day here had been anything but, that felt a little strange. Luna didn¡¯t care¨Cthey could lie about their history all they wanted. She was leaning against Diana, and something felt so deeply right about that she almost couldn¡¯t process it. When it was over they had a chance to ask questions. Initially no one raised a hand, and Luna half expected Miriam to be angry, but their pledge master just watched with interest. Finally, it was Arie¡¯s hand that went up. ¡°Not related to the presentation, but who were the other servants here with us today?¡± they asked. ¡°I¡¯d like to remember names.¡± Arie¡¯s other hand was in Claire¡¯s long brown waves, gently brushing it and scratching at her neck. Luna felt relief that Claire seemed to have settled down and found some comfort. She also felt a moment of envy at their easy intimacy. She was leaning against Diana herself, yes, but it still felt so awkward¨Cshe was certain Diana was just tolerating her. The ease with which Claire leant into the touch, the way she just seemed to belong between Arie¡¯s scalp was incomparable. Allyson seemed momentarily surprised by the question, but then smiled and answered it. ¡°The woman who left after introductions was named Elya, and the one who¡¯s standing at the wall of the house over there¡±¨Cshe pointed next to the stairs they¡¯d come down from, and the servant there gave a small wave¨C¡°is named Isabelle.¡± Arie nodded. ¡°Thank you.¡± Miriam clapped twice, pulling all eyes on her. Luna once again felt the pull as Miriam effortlessly took up all the space in the room. ¡°Alright! You¡¯ll get a digital copy of the presentation today. I expect you all to memorize it. You¡¯ll be responsible for knowing it by Tuesday.¡± Miriam walked back to the front, and Allyson sank to her knees. ¡°We have one last thing to cover today. As you might have noticed, things at Delta Sigma run a little bit differently than at most houses on sorority row. ¡°We give and receive more intensely. You¡¯re going to experience some things here that will seem intense, or even cruel. In some cases they will happen to you or another new member. In other cases, especially as you meet more of our family, they¡¯ll be happening to your older siblings. Particularly for those of you wearing the white collars: our rules here are enforced, and enforced strictly. Try to avoid earning a punishment in your first week.¡± Luna felt herself shiver at that, and by some instinct pushed herself closer against Diana. She even forgot her insecurities for a moment as Diana, seemingly on a similar instinct, began to gently pet her hair. ¡°Understand that we generally know what we¡¯re doing,¡± Miriam continued, ¡°All of us are here because this life, in all its intimacy and harshness, suits us. You¡¯re here because we think it will suit you too. We are rarely wrong.¡± She didn¡¯t know about harshness, but Luna wanted that intimacy so badly. The energy between Miriam and Neha, what she saw now as Allyson knelt contentedly next to Miriam, she wanted it all. Miriam did that tone shift again, as she somehow instantly switched to a kind of gentle warmth. ¡°Congratulations on making it through the first day.. You¡¯ll also all get an invitation to the initiates group chat. I expect everyone, potential minders included, to turn on their location sharing. I don¡¯t particularly care if I see you visiting a brothel¨Cassuming you can find the time and that it¡¯s approved in your weekly schedule¨Cbut I am responsible for your safety, and this will help us ensure it.¡± She very visibly ran through some sort of mental list, then smiled. ¡°Alright, that¡¯s all for tonight. Text the group when you¡¯re back in your dorms, or just turn on location sharing before you get there.¡± Luna was almost sad to go, but the walk home was easy in the afterglow of everything that had happened. According to a text message from Neha she had an appointment with Miriam the next day, and her calendar for the next week would be packed with Delta Sigma related activities. So, instead of letting herself worry, she joined the group chat, turned on her location sharing, and basked in the afterglow as she drifted off to sleep with her collection of plushies. IV. First Evening II Allyson turned off the lights on the second floor new-member house. Isabelle and Neha had already gone home together¨Clight duty came with a rule that forbade crossing campus alone, so Neha had to join as an escort. She walked past Miriam on the way to the basement. The pledge master typed away her laptop, finishing today¡¯s notes. As much as Neha and herself and the rest would offer their opinions, the ultimate success or failure of this batch rested on Miriam¡¯s strong shoulders. And failure wasn¡¯t an option. It was a lot of pressure, and she knew Miriam had been working long hours since summer¨Creally since her apprenticeship last year¨Cto prepare for it. The basement of the Northside house was smaller than the main house, dominated by a single large room and a couple storage closets. That made closing down a relatively light task. She checked all the storage closets, turned off some lights, turned on the auxiliary security system, then made her last check of the central room, the reason the basement had to exist. The door hummed as she approached, just as it always did. She didn¡¯t see the blue glow as brightly as the rest of her sisters did. Instead, there was an audible tone, a resonance through sound instead of light. She ran her hand down the door briefly, reverently. Then she grabbed the correct key from her carabiner and opened it. The floor glowed the same light blue as it always did, even as the resonant tone washed over her. She¡¯d gotten a pianist in Delta Sigma to help her figure out the sound once. It came out to a D3¨Cshe¡¯d preferred music in D, A or G major or its associated minors ever since. The blue glow was strongest on the surface of an 8 inch thick metal ring inlaid into the floor. Its 20 ft diameter encompassed the entire basement room. The runes inscribed onto it shone almost neon and dug into her skull. She knew from her history lessons¨Cthe actual history lessons¨Cthat the ring was another 8 inches deep into the ground and covered with runes beneath the earth as well. The metal had been liquified by magic, then poured. Allyson smiled as she swept the room¨CElya had left more smiley stickers on the structural columns supporting the ground floor. They didn¡¯t actually touch the roof, instead they were knee high solid stone blocks covered in runes. A matching set of runes sat on the ceiling above them. Allyson didn¡¯t understand the theory, but it was crucial that the basement form a single open plane, uninterupted by walls or pillars. She knelt down to inspect the ring. A quick brush with her hand and the resonance ran up her arm, as healthy as she¡¯d ever seen it. The hum was almost overpowering here. She checked the glyphs¨Cthey were still well defined with their blue glow. A look at the surface of the metal showed that it was still spotless. Unlike the rest of the basement the ring was self cleaning, and any kind of dirt on it would be a warning sign that it was weakening. Linking the ring here to its big sister in the main house was arguably Delta Sig¡¯s greatest achievement in the last decade. That held both in the difficulty in the magic, and in the impact on the sorority¨Cbeing first exposed to a smaller resonant space had greatly reduced the amount of trauma and serious injury among their new member classes. This text was taken from Royal Road. Help the author by reading the original version there. Allyson gently placed her full hand over the metal and let the peace of the Delta Sigma resonance wash over her. It wasn¡¯t part of the closing routine, but it reminded her of her place, her loyalties, her undying devotion. She wasn¡¯t the same person who had walked into the Northside house three years ago, and that was okay. She focused for a moment and found it¨Cseven tiny new notes, both heard and felt, not quite matching the D3 of Delta Sigma quite yet. Still independent, still with their own rhythm and tone. They¡¯d be a part of the greater symphony soon. Everything looked fine, so she turned off the light in the basement and went upstairs. Miriam and Elya were waiting for her, laptops packed and ready for the 20 minute walk back to the main house. ¡°I¡¯m all ready to go, Miss.¡± Allyson told her superior. ¡°Good girl, lets get home.¡± Miriam grabbed her backpack, brushed Elya¡¯s shoulder. Elya made a small sign of affirmation with her left hand, then grabbed her own things. They walked down the street towards campus, and Allyson watched the un-fruit, with their colorful-but-somehow-still-blue glow and their unreal textures. They grew on vines on the un-vines up and down the street. It reminded her of a fairy garden, centered on the Northside house and extending about half a block in each direction. Beauty, but only for the initiated. Beauty, but only for those who could see. Beauty, but only for those who had given up everything to be one of them. The otherworldly plants lessened as they got further from the Northside house, though they¡¯d pass two more smaller groves near campus hotspots on the way home. The first hotpots hadn¡¯t shown up until last year, and it wasn¡¯t until recently that they understood they could ¡®claim¡¯ t hem with their own resonacne. They weren¡¯t quite as blue yet, though one of them was getting close¨Ca C# instead of a D. She touched one of the fruit, enjoyed the way her mind couldn¡¯t quite comprehend the sensation. Only Samie had managed to eat and enjoy them, but Samie was¡­ changed. She wondered if one of the new members would end up like her. Probably not¨Cthey¡¯d lucked out once and hopefully all learned from that experience. They spent a while walking in silence as Miriam tapped away on her phone. ¡°Which one do you think will turn first?¡± She didn¡¯t look up, but kept typing. Allyson idly fingered the bracelet on her left wrist, given to her by Sarah during their house ball last spring. ¡°I think Becca first, then Luna or Persephone or Diana. I can¡¯t read Riga, but Claire is going to be a problem.¡± Elya said nothing, of course. ¡°Mmmm, that¡¯s not a bad guess,¡± Miriam said, ¡°But I think you¡¯re wrong. I think Luna is going to sink right in and lose herself. Claire will take some work.¡± They kept walking for a while and passed one of the campus hotspots. Allyson heard the wardstone they were using to attune the groves, to turn them into loci of their own power. The sound felt even closer to their resonance than yesterday, and the fruit looked almost blue as well. She passed her hand through one, enjoyed the tingle that ran up her arm. Miriam spoke up again as they left the grove behind, still reading off her phone. ¡°Lots of activity in the hills tonight. We might have a bit of an active night.¡± The master manipulator looked up from her phone, giving Allyson that look of joyful menace she kept so carefully in check around the pledges. ¡°You, my little servant, on the other hand,¡± Miriam said, ¡°you don¡¯t need to worry about a thing until tomorrow¨CI got a text message from Sarah.¡± ¡°Wha¨C¡° Allyson didn¡¯t get any further. Miriam snapped a finger in front of Allyson¡¯s eyes, made a symbol with her hands, and Allyson¡¯s mind went blank. V. First Day [Week 1.1] Claire woke with a groan. It was only 9am on a Sunday, but according to a text from Neha she was supposed to be Northside for some individual conversations by 11:30. A 6am follow up corrected that they would do something called ¡°ballet and etiquette¡± instead. After a night of sleep it all sounded too crazy. She glanced at the white choker/collar lying on her nightstand. She could just¡­ not put it on? Of course, some amount of ¡°we¡¯ll run your life from now on¡± was typical for a sorority. And Claire had been expecting it! But now she had a literal fucking collar. That definitely wasn¡¯t on any of the online ¡°what to expect from being a new member¡± guides. But something about last night had felt so incredibly right too. Sitting at Arie¡¯s feet, when Arie had started to pet her and play with her hair¨CClaire shivered just remembering it. She¡¯d almost drifted off, had half expected to get chastised by Miriam, but the one time she looked over she got a rare smile instead. Even as she got ready for another probably difficult day in the house on Northside, she couldn¡¯t sort out her feelings. The rules were dumb. She didn¡¯t¨Ccouldn¡¯t¨Clet someone control her life like that. And letting someone decide if you¡¯re even allowed to sit on furniture? Never mind what else they might add later? It was shameful. Yet sitting at Arie¡¯s feet had felt so right. She could escape the rules by quitting, but then she wouldn¡¯t be in a sorority, probably ever, and evenings like last night would never happen again. And she¡¯d be a failure and her mom would be right. She checked her phone, and realized she was running late. Fuck. She hurried through her most basic makeup routine, ignored the mistake in her eyeliner, threw on what she hoped would be an acceptable top¨Cfuck ballet probably required movement, right? Claire switched to something more flexible, then ran out the door. One sprint across campus later and she arrived, out of breath and sweating, at 11:35. Fuck fuck fuck. Her worst fears briefly flashed through her mind. The door being locked. Getting publicly yelled at. Getting kicked out. A part of her wanted to just turn and run right now. She froze, half turned around, then shook her entire body and knocked on the door. She wouldn¡¯t be so weak. Allyson opened the door almost the second Claire¡¯s knuckles made contact. The freshman tried to rush past her, to take off her shoes and rush into the living room, but an arm crossed her path and she got pulled into a hug. A hand pushed her head into the crook of the older sister¡¯s neck. ¡°It¡¯s okay, it¡¯s okay, calm down,¡± Allyson whispered. ¡°You¡¯re in a bit of trouble, yes, but no one is going to hurt you.¡± Claire blinked in confusion. ¡°You¡¯re going to be okay,¡± the other girl continued, ¡°we still care about you, it¡¯s just a minor correction, and we¡¯re going to help you improve.¡± Without even meaning to, Claire felt herself relax¨Cwhich made the experience almost more disorienting. She took a deep breath. ¡°Take off your shoes.¡± Allyson released her from the hug. ¡°Everyone else is upstairs already, first room on the right. And tell Miriam that Allyson is making her some chai tea to apologize, first thing when you get in please.¡± Claire took off her shoes and hurried up the stairs, then went into the first door on the right. Time to learn what ¡°ballet and ettiquette¡± was. The first thing she noticed when she entered was that she was in a dance studio. Large mirrors lined two walls perpendicular to large, airy, floor to ceiling windows. The midday sun brushed the tan hardwood floors, and someone had tilted one of the windows open to let in a breeze from the garden. The mirrored wall farthest from the door had ballet barre¡¯s mounted on in. Claire felt a moment of longing for the childhood dance classes her mom had forced her to quit. The second thing she noticed was Miriam, standing at the front of the room, looking absolutely furious. The pledge master opened her mouth¨C ¡°Allyson said she¡¯s making you tea.¡± Claire beat her to it. ¡°A chai tea? I think? As an apology?¡± Miriam¡¯s expression softened, and the expected outburst never came. ¡°Alright,¡± she said instead, ¡°I¡¯ll have to thank Allyson later.¡± She looked back at the rest of the group. ¡°Claire, we¡¯ll talk about this later. For now, please join your fellow future servants. We were just talking about what ¡®ballet and ettiquette¡¯ means here.¡± Claire slinked to the far wall. Luna, Persephone, and Becca already stood in a line, waiting for instructions. She tried to copy their position, then realized they were all barefoot. She hurried her own socks off as well. As she threw them into a corner, Miriam continued. ¡°We mostly call it ballet because we teach it in a ballet studio. Someone a long time ago maybe thought it was funny. What we actually care about is teaching you movement and grace. You¡¯ve seen the way servants like Allyson and Elya move. You¡¯re learning that as well.¡± Persephone raised her hand to ask a question, but Claire kept talking. ¡°To answer Perse¡¯s question, yes minders will learn something very similar¡ªI didn¡¯t move like this before Delta Sig either. The skills do cross apply¡ªso respect the effort that they¡¯re going through, and know that they can and will eventually correct you.¡± Miriam stepped to the corner and picked up a cane out of a basket. It was long and thin and maybe made of bamboo. ¡°This is a little more precise than the riding crop I used yesterday,¡± she said, ¡°I¡¯ll be gentle with it at first. I¡¯ll be gentle if I feel you¡¯re making an effort. If you need motivation, I won¡¯t be.¡± As Miriam moved back to the center, Allyson walked in carrying a large cardboard box. She dumped it next to Miriam, then took out a stack of clothes. Miriam pointed at her assistant with the cane. ¡°There¡¯s a sports bra and biking shorts in here for each of you.¡± Allyson began handing a bundle to each of them. The fabric was soft, with the gentle stretch so often found in high quality athletic clothing. Persephone and Becca both looked impressed as well. Luna did not. ¡°Luna, I know you want to change outside,¡± Miriam said, ¡°but no one¡¯s removing their underwear today, so you get to face towards the window wall where no one will see your front.¡± Luna glowed like a neon sign, the emotional color a combination of embarrassment and distress. When Allyson got to the end of the line she handed Luna the bundle but stuck around. As Luna faced the window the senior servant placed a gentle hand on her back and blocked the room with her body, giving her some added privacy. Claire ignored the spectacle and quickly swapped outfits. The bicycle shorts and sports bra were exactly her size and even had her name and Delta Sigma branding on them. If that wasn¡¯t creepy enough, that they had made these in just about 48 hours over a weekend definitely was. Miriam didn¡¯t give her long to think about it. ¡°Alright everybody, first thing we¡¯re going to work on is posture.¡± She walked over to Luna and Becca standing on the left, and immediately tapped Becca¡¯s shoulder. ¡°Becca, there¡¯s ways to look small and meek without slouching, especially at your size.¡± She tapped Luna as well. ¡°Luna, slouching will not make you Becca¡¯s size.¡± Becca looked embarrassed, but Luna looked mortified. Miriam moved so fast and suddenly it took Claire¡¯s brain a moment to catch up. The minder stepped into Luna¡¯s personal space, bodies almost touching. She grabbed the nape of Luna¡¯s neck with her left hand and pulled her forcefully down, getting Luna¡¯s head to her own height and leaning it against her shoulder. Meanwhile, her right hand did an elegant twirl with the cane until it was held behind her arm just by three fingers. This freed her palm, which she used to gently stroke Luna¡¯s back. The sides of their face touched, and Luna, despite her distress, seemed to melt into the touch. ¡°You¡¯re pretty as you are,¡± Miriam whispered forcefully, ¡°and will get even prettier with time. People way taller than you have looked far meeker than Becca. You both are going to grow so much. And you are going to look so so graceful and pretty doing it.¡± ¡°Take a deep breath for me.¡± She let go of Luna¡¯s neck and backed up a step. Luna swayed on her feet for a moment. Miriam¡¯s gaze swept the room. ¡°All of you are going to be very different in 4 months. And that starts with cutting bad habits.¡± Miriam narrowed her attention again. Persephone got a simpler, quicker correction for standing more on her left foot than her right. It was just a tap on her calf, and she bowed her head respectfully to Miriam before making the adjustment. Claire didn¡¯t understand how she did it so easily. But then Miriam approached Claire, and Claire felt the pang of fear again. This was both simple, but it was also giving in, and that¨C Miriam¡¯s somewhat more forceful tap to her upper back had Clair instantly straighten her spine, and the pain stopped her thoughts. This was harder than the others had been hit, but Miriam didn¡¯t give her space to worry. The pain was too distracting. A hand touched her shoulder. Miriam, grounding her, moving her body. ¡°Same thing for you, hunching will not make you invisible.¡± A hand on her lower back, pushing her back straight. Forceful, but not the cane. ¡°You¡¯re part of Delta Sigma now, and you will be proud of it.¡± Something bubbled up deep inside Claire, and she reacted on instinct. It came out as a whisper. ¡°Yes ma¡¯am.¡± ¡°Good girl, I¡¯ve got you.¡± Miriam¡¯s response inflamed the confusing thing deep inside her gut. Somehow she felt calmer all the same. Miriam stepped back. Claire shivered, but kept herself upright. She felt raw, and she wasn¡¯t even sure why she¡¯d spoken the words. But she understood now how Luna and Becca and maybe even Persephone had felt under Miriam¡¯s gaze¨Clike they were the only person in the room, swamped away by an ocean wave. Like Miriam was staring right into her soul, and there was nothing she could hide. Luckily the attention vanished again just as quickly, as Miriam walked back to the front. The minder described proper posture on Allyson, then sent the servant off to do other tasks around the house. They drilled posture after that. From there, they practiced walking. Miriam tapped, then nudged, then beat until they could all do what Miriam called ¡°a half decent basic walk.¡± Persephone got it first, at ease with both what was asked for them and Miriam¡¯s methods for achieving it. Becca and Luna continued to struggle with trying to hunch their shoulders, while Claire just felt uncomfortable¨Csomething inside her was screaming, while something else told her to give into Miriam and never look back. The conflict showed in her movements, and she started getting more and more taps. Claire also felt Miriam¡¯s growing attention. And it made everything worse. It was subtle, but every glance started to feel like shame, every incidental touch started to feel like an encroachment. When Claire was the last one still struggling, she felt Miriam decide to act. When Miriam grabbed her by the arm, her breath froze. She felt her own impending doom. ¡°Everyone else, practice standing posture, far wall. I want you to correct each other. Everything wrong with one of you when I come back will result in punishment for the other two. Claire, come with me for a moment.¡± She didn¡¯t quite lead Claire out the door, but instead to the little entry hallway between the door and the ballet room proper. ¡°First, how do you feel about touch?¡± Miriam asked. ¡°We have you fill out surveys later, but I need that answer right now.¡± Claire was almost completely frozen. ¡°Fine? I guess?¡± She squeezed out, ¡°I¡¯m not sure I understand the question.¡± Miriam nodded. ¡°Okay, so no major trauma I¡¯m going to stumble on by giving you a hug?¡± Claire shook her head, and before she could even open her mouth, Miriam had grabbed her and pulled her in to a tight embrace. Claire felt herself tense, then relax a little. Miriam spoke calmly but quietly. ¡°Tell me what you¡¯re feeling right now.¡± Claire felt emotions bubble up, but she pushed them down and controlled herself. ¡°I¡¯m¡­ not sure?¡± She answered. Miriam said nothing for a moment. ¡°Your whole body is tense, more than I think you even realize,¡± she said, ¡°and you¡¯ve been resisting me all day.¡± Claire¡¯s uncertainty transformed to confusion. ¡°Of course I¡¯d feel that way?¡± she asked. Miriam shook her head. ¡°Look at the rest, how they let themselves be lead.¡± Claire felt herself tense again. Something screaming. Deep breath, calm down. ¡°I just¡­ I can¡¯t do that.¡± She searched for the right words. ¡°It¡¯s wrong.¡± Miriam didn¡¯t say anything for a moment. To Claire, the minder¡¯s careful consideration was almost audible, the tik-tok of a dangerous clock. ¡°There¡¯s nothing I can do for this right now,¡± she eventually said, ¡°but immediately when this lesson ends, you¡¯re going to see someone who can give you more advice.¡± She pulled away and looked Claire in the eyes. They were almost the same height, with Claire being maybe an inch shorter. This narrative has been unlawfully taken from Royal Road. If you see it on Amazon, please report it. ¡°For now, I¡¯d like you to just go along with things. You don¡¯t have to mean it in your heart, just pretend. Can you do that?¡± She asked Claire gently. Claire nodded her head. Miriam smiled. ¡°What do we say?¡± Claire felt something ease up, and even managed to smile back. ¡°Yes miss.¡± It all felt lighter somehow, and the rest of posture instruction passed without incident. They did more walking, then sitting, then more walking. When they finished, they each had a few welts, but not nearly as many as they¡¯d had corrections. Miriam had kept to her word. Etiquette opened with a simple explanation from Miriam. ¡°Posture is about how you hold yourself by default¡ªin the normal world. Etiquette is about how you change that and why.¡± They hadn¡¯t dressed, and Miriam still held the cane like it was an extension of her hand. ¡°The first thing we¡¯re going to start with,¡± she began, ¡°is kneeling.¡± ¡°Which, speaking of¡­¡± She looked at the door. ¡°Welcome back Allyson.¡± Allyson walked in as if floating on air, her torso perfectly steady and the teacup she held with two hands. It moved so gracefully it might as well have been floating. She sank to her knees in front of Miriam, the tea cup still perfectly level, and spoke only three words. ¡°Your chai, miss. I apologize for earlier.¡± Miriam accepted the tea without a word, and then ignored Allyson completely as she turned back to the assembled future Allysons. The actual Allyson didn¡¯t move at all, and just kept her head down, hands resting back on her thighs. There was something abject about it, the way Allyson almost groveled just by kneeling. The exchange reached deep into Claire¨Ctouched something raw and not understood. She recoiled in horror. It seemed so unequal, so unfair. Allyson, who had held and supported Claire in her moment of panic earlier, who had looked so dignified yesterday¡ªboth while standing against the wall in silent support, and while sharing the sorority¡¯s history¡ªnow reduced to this. Claire had been told to promise the tea on her behalf. Was this humiliation Claire¡¯s punishment for being late, carried by Allyson? Or had Allyson made Claire promise it for some other favor, maybe to defer the punishment? She was certain Miriam was about to beat her when she¡¯d forwarded the message, and then she hadn¡¯t. Claire almost crumpled under the guilt, but pulled herself together. She promised herself she wouldn¡¯t let herself keep being pushed around. She took half a step forward¡­ ¡­and watched Miriam¡¯s demeanor shift completely. The minder seemed to get bigger, looming over Claire without ever moving from her spot. ¡°And what do you think you¡¯re doing, little girl?¡± Miriam asked. The question was laced with dark promise. If Miriam¡¯s attention had felt like a spotlight before, now it felt like a targeting laser. Claire felt the adrenaline rush through her. ¡°You don¡¯t have to treat her like¨C¡° The cane struck Claire before she could finish the sentence. It didn¡¯t look like Miriam used a lot of effort, but the cane still left a sharp burning line, almost like a cut. Claire barely suppressed a noise. Her leg jerked anyway, and her whole body lurched to the right. She almost lost her balance. Before she could recover, Miriam struck her left leg with a backhanded stroke. This one was harder, and this time she yelped. As her leg twitched a foot hooked her behind the knee and a hand pushed down on her shoulders. Claire found herself forced to the ground. The minder whispered, just for her to hear. ¡°You won¡¯t understand yet, but this is a mercy.¡± A hand stroked her hair, and Claire¡¯s brain skipped a beat. The freshman curled further in on herself, paralyzed, but Miriam just looked up and talked to the room. ¡°Allyson, grab Claire here and bring her to Jacqueline. Tell her she¡¯ll need Kacie. And inform her of the incident this morning and let her handle it.¡± Through watery eyes Claire saw Allyson rise from her kneel. The servant moved with perfect calm, as if a future servant getting abused wasn¡¯t in any way unusual. ¡°Yes miss.¡± Claire felt everything go a little bit numb as hands under her armpits pulled her up. Allison was guiding her out of the room. They were walking, the opposite direction of the staircase. They stopped somewhere, before a closed door. Allyson pulled her into a long hug. The older girl didn¡¯t say anything. She let Claire sink into the touch and Claire tried to ground herself amidst the confusion. Allyson took her a few rooms down, though Claire wasn¡¯t exactly sure how many, then dragged her through a door and dropped her on a couch. Claire curled up in the corner and tried to disappear. Unfortunately it didn¡¯t work, and moments later someone else entered the room. She was tall, with sharp cheekbones and long black hair that made it most of the way down her back. Her eyes reflected a kindness and openness that made some part of Claire immediately open up. She wanted her approval. Her clothes bordered on professional, with a pencil skirt and stockings. A pair of kitten shaped slippers mellowed out the outfit, and gave the impression of an inside joke that everybody was immediately in on. Her entire presence radiated strength and calm. She crouched in front of Claire, lowering herself gracefully to Claire¡¯s height. ¡°Hello Claire. My name is Jacqueline. I¡¯m here to help you. Do you mind if I join you on your couch?¡± Claire shook her head. ¡°No¨CI mean, it¡¯s fine if you do.¡± Despite the kindness, Claire continued to clutch her legs. She felt¡­ Scared. Unsafe. Confused. Distant. Jacqueline gently placed a palm on Claire¡¯s knee. Not quite forceful, but suggesting strength. ¡°I understand that was probably really scary for you.¡± Jacqueline waited for Claire¡¯s nod before she continued. ¡°I imagine there was probably some kind of deep feeling of¡­¡± she hesitated for a moment, ¡°injustice¨Cmaybe?¨Cthat compelled that.¡± Claire nodded again, and Jacqueline brushed a hand down Claire¡¯s leg as she kept talking. ¡°Understand that Miriam is not mad at you¨Cwas not mad at you¨Cshe¡¯s just asserting her authority. Normally she would punish you and then the two of you would reconnect, and you would know your place better.¡± Claire felt herself tensing up, and Jacqueline gently tapped her leg. ¡°But I think,¡± Jacqueline continued, ¡°for reasons I¡¯m quickly coming to understand, she didn¡¯t think that would work.¡± That made no sense to Claire, and somehow Jacqueline picked up on that. ¡°Claire, if Miriam had publicly punished you for stepping in between her and Allyson, would you be more or less curled into a ball right now?¡± she asked. Claire felt a flash of rage. ¡°She¨C she absolutely did punish me!¡± The injustice of it all. ¡°She humiliated me.¡± It was unbearable. ¡°She violated me.¡± Suddenly she was crying. Claire dug her head deeper into her knees, tried to close up the shell again, but Jacqueline just gave an affectionate sigh. ¡°Did she make you stand, palms on the wall, legs slightly past shoulder width apart, then had you recite exactly what you did wrong, followed by somewhere between 5 and 50 strikes of the cane, before giving you forgiveness and then resuming the lesson?¡± ¡°No¡­.¡± Claire whispered into her legs. ¡°But that sounds unbearable.¡± ¡°And I think you¡¯re actually right there. I think today you couldn¡¯t have borne it. And so did Miriam when she decided to send you here instead.¡± There was a moment¡¯s pause before Jacqueline spoke again. ¡°Right now, the key difference between you and the rest of the gals wearing the white chokers is, while they fear the cane, they care about Miriam¡¯s approval more. You, on the other hand, fear caring at all.¡± Claire didn¡¯t understand. ¡°Here, may I hold you? We usually have you fill out a form about this sort of thing, but you were supposed to do that with me in¡­ about half an hour.¡± Claire just nodded. She really just wanted to be alone, maybe under her bed, but that was dumb. Jacqueline touching her couldn¡¯t make things worse now. The arms that enveloped her felt cold and distant and Claire couldn¡¯t trust them. But they were there. ¡°Claire, what do you know about dominance and submission?¡± That was an easy question. ¡°Not very much.¡± There was momentary spike of emotion, and some lingering bitterness on Claire¡¯s insides came out. ¡°Isn¡¯t dominance something between dogs?¡± Jacquline just chuckled and ran a hand down Claire¡¯s side. ¡°Dominance and submission, or D/s, is the practice of giving and receiving power over others. It¡¯s a more explicit, intentional version of something all humans naturally do. Think about that friend group that always has that one friend deciding what the group does, or the study group where one person naturally takes charge of organizing. ¡°It¡¯s also the practice our little organization is built on.¡± Claire stayed clenched. Of course people would seek power over others. She¡¯d expected some of this, in the form of hazing. But to make the hazing worse on purpose¡­ Jacqueline seemed to sense her confusion. Or maybe she¡¯d just had this conversation before. ¡°Yes humans have a pretty negative history with seeking and obtaining power,¡± she admitted. ¡°What we do is give and receive more intensely, but learn to act more precisely and thoughtfully. People with certain inclinations and histories find that more comforting than ¡®normal¡¯ society.¡± That still made absolutely no sense. She meant to ask a question, but it came out sharp and hurt instead. ¡°How is what Miriam did supposed to be comforting?¡± ¡°I¡¯m maybe not the right person to answer that.¡± She raised her voice for a moment. ¡°Come in please, Kacie.¡± Kacie¡­ looked like a cheerleader. She radiated optimistic California energy, and looked like she dragged her friend group hiking on the weekends. Her dirty-blond waves made her the closest to a typical sorority girl of anyone Claire had met in Delta Sigma. The only thing off about her was a recent cut running back on her left cheek, like someone had rushed her with a knife or barely missed her with an arrow. She still strode through the room like a prom queen. And then Kacie kneeled, like it was the most natural thing in the world, at their feet¨Cjust like Allyson with Miriam. She gently placed her palm on Claire¡¯s leg, then rested her head carefully, but confidently, on Jacqueline¡¯s thigh. Jacqueline drew Claire¡¯s attention back to her. ¡°This is Kacie. She¡¯s the VP of Delta Sigma, and with our president carries responsibility for everything that happens in our organization. She¡¯s also¨C¡± Jacqueline¡¯s finger moved smoothly down Kacie¡¯s face to hook a finger under her black collar, and Kacie leant into the touch. ¡°¨Cmine.¡± ¡°Hello Claire!¡± Kacie gave her a small smile, which Claire didn¡¯t return. The tears had stopped, but she still felt paralyzed and everything was still so far away. And everything about this felt suspicious. Jacqueline¡¯s hand moved back up to pet Kacie¡¯s hair. ¡°Claire was just asking how getting pushed around and punished by Miriam can be comforting.¡± Kacie made a thoughtful sound before talking. ¡°Well, first I¡¯d say it¡¯s comforting on the whole, not always in the moment.¡± She drummed her fingers on Claire¡¯s leg. ¡°I messed up something important between me and Jacky last spring, and I got punished in front of the whole house. It was horrible. But I felt so much better afterwards¨Cthe guilt would have eaten me up¨Cand I feel amazing every day waking up knowing I belong to Miss.¡± The guilt thing made sense, Claire always felt horrible if she so much as misspoke to a friend. But still¨C ¡°I think it¡¯s worth taking a step back,¡± Jacqueline interrupted, ¡°to why submitting to me is comfortable in the first place.¡± Kacie nodded her head. ¡°Yes miss, that¡¯s fair.¡± She brushed Claire¡¯s leg. ¡°You¡¯re going to find your own reasons for this, but for me I get peace and security from placing myself in Jacky¡¯s hands. It lets me shut off the anxious parts of my brain and gives me someone to focus myself on. That lets me be a beter version of me.¡± Jacqueline exerted gentle pressure on Claire¡¯s knees as she picked up the conversation again. ¡°I think it¡¯s important for you to understand that you¡¯re not lesser or weak for submitting, or for being a servant,¡± she said. ¡°In fact, I think that¡¯s the most important thing for you to understand. I invited Kacie here because she¡¯s a servant, just like you will be. But she¡¯s also the second most powerful person in our house, in more ways than one.¡± Claire tried to piece that together in her mind, even as Jacqueline ran another hand down the inside of her leg. Kacie, kneeling and seemingly perfectly harmless. Vulnerable even. Somehow still powerful. ¡°That¨C¡± She felt more relaxed, but her voice was hoarse from crying, so she coughed once, twice before continuing. ¡°¨Cthat makes no sense at all.¡± Kacie nodded. ¡°I get the confusion.¡± She thought for a moment. ¡°Okay, so Neha is submissive to pretty much everybody. Like, she runs calendars and logistics for pretty much everybody in the house, always uses miss, even with the pledges. But she also exerts power over the pledges in service to the house.¡± ¡°It¡¯s a dance,¡± Jacqueline explained, ¡°you wouldn¡¯t say a lead in ballroom is more important or better than the follow, and a lead in ballroom that doesn¡¯t listen to and work with their follow would be terrible at the sport. We just¡­ live our entire lives this way. And you wouldn¡¯t be here if we didn¡¯t think that also made sense for you.¡± The ball of hurt inside Claire had another question in response. ¡°Why does it seem to be so easy for everyone else then?¡± ¡°First, I don¡¯t think it¡¯s easy for everybody,¡± Jacqueline replied, ¡°you¡¯re just struggling first and most visibly. Second, I think you come from a past where power was used to hurt, where vulnerability to power meant you weren¡¯t safe. And maybe it¡¯s because of that that you¡¯re drawn to it. Because even this interaction is steeped in power, and look at how well you responded.¡± Claire saw Jacqueline smile and went instinctively to full alertness. In a rush panic she realized that yes, somewhere in this she had fully leaned back into Jacqueline, and was now resting her head in the crook of Jacqueline¡¯s neck. Her feet were still on the couch but instead of holding her feet, her arms were being gently held against her body by Jacqueline¡¯s arms, and her legs were resting open, relaxed, against the minder¡¯s. Some part of her wanted to jerk away, but after everything that had happened she was so exhausted she could fall asleep, and in that emotional emptiness the needed anger didn¡¯t come. Something about Jacqueline¡¯s steady, calm persistence had unwound her, and with the help of those careful, deliberate touches, Jacqueline had pulled her back open. Now she was in the older girl¡¯s lap, wrapped in her embrace. She felt suddenly vulnerable. Without the anger to protect her there was only one available source of comfort: Without really thinking about it, she turned around and pulled herself against Jacqueline, who permitted it and stroked a hand down Claire¡¯s back. Jacqueline¡¯s hand disappeared for just a moment, then Kacie joined them on the couch. The older servant cuddled into Claire from the other side. They stayed that way for a while, and Claire felt herself slowly come back to her body. Eventually, Jacqueline pulled them apart and ran a gentle hand down Claire¡¯s cheek. ¡°So,¡± she spoke softly, ¡°we still have some infractions to redeem you for.¡± Claire tensed a little again, then took a deep breath. It was intimidating, but the idea didn¡¯t have the all consuming horror it did half an hour ago. She was just out of emotional capacity to feel terrified. ¡°I think what you need right now is compassion and intimacy, which is why I¡¯m going to suggest a bare handed spanking. It won¡¯t be against the wall, and both Kacie and I will be with you the whole time. We¡¯ll go gentle, enough to consider you forgiven, but not so much you can¡¯t take it. How does that sound?¡± Claire didn¡¯t have anything left, she just nodded. Moments later, Jacqueline untangled herself from Claire, and with a gentle yet firm hand Claire was guided over Jacqueline¡¯s knees. Kacie adjusted herself as well, and moments later Claire felt her warm and steadfast presence in front of her. Kacie took Claire¡¯s hands into her own and leaned her forehead against Claire¡¯s. Claire still only wore the bicycle shorts from the ballet class, and fortunately Jacqueline didn¡¯t make her take those off. Instead, she began spanking Claire. It felt different from the crop, less sharp. The pants probably made a difference as well. Each but more like it was going through her posterior and reaching her somewhere deep inside. Jacqueline alternated, first spanking one ass cheek then the other, hard enough that Claire felt it but not so hard that Claire couldn¡¯t handle the pain. The pain started to build, and Claire wasn¡¯t sure if she¡¯d be able to go on. She must have gotten at least ten hits by now, but Jacqueline had suggested earlier that a caning could go up to fifty. Kacie squeezed Claire¡¯s hands from the front, as if to transfer the freshman some of her own strength. It helped a little, and Claire hung on. ¡°Relax. Just relax,¡± Kacie whispered. The blows kept coming. Claire tried relaxing, even managed to do it for one or two blows, but it was too much. Kacie didn¡¯t give up. ¡°Imagine you¡¯re giving the pain a hug.¡± That visual helped somehow. She embraced it, dove into it instead of ran away from it, and suddenly she was on the other side, limp, as the blows kept coming but stopped overwhelming her. They still hurt. They were still painful. But suddenly she could ¡®keep up¡¯ with it somehow, like the pain was flowing through her instead of building up. Kacie smiled at her. A few moments later Jacqueline¡¯s hand slowed, and began rubbing instead. ¡°You¡¯re a good girl, Claire,¡± Jacqueline said above her, ¡°and you¡¯re forgiven.¡± Somehow, she did feel a little better. She hadn¡¯t wanted to be late, didn¡¯t like the idea that she was a bad student, even if the way others treated what was happening so easily still confused her. They stayed that way for a while, Jacqueline running small circles over her back as Claire slowly came back into her body. Jacqueline pet her head, and helped her slide off her lap onto the floor. ¡°You were going through some kind of trauma response earlier so it was fine then, but now that you¡¯re coming back to yourself, I¡¯m going to ask you to start calling me ma¡¯am, and Kacie miss. And you should thank me for the punishment.¡± Claire struggled to find her voice again. ¡°Th¨C Thank you, ma¡¯am.¡± She felt dazed somehow. ¡°Lastly, I¡¯d like to apologize to you,¡± Jacqueline added, ¡°we had a bit of an incident back at the main house, so we flipped the schedule around a little, and in retrospect that probably wasn¡¯t the best idea. We¡¯re supposed to do some introductory stuff now that should have happened this morning, but why don¡¯t you spend some time relaxing with Kacie in one of the rooms, and we¡¯ll get back to you later?¡± Claire just nodded, feeling somehow meek. ¡°Yes ma¡¯am, and thank you for spending time with me, miss.¡± Kacie just smiled at her, grabbed her by the hand, and lead her out the door. They went around a bend in the hall, to a door at the end. ¡°Lets grab this one,¡± Kacie said, and lead Claire into a small space dominated by a bay window overlooking the yard, with a beautiful day bed set within. The walls were made almost entirely of bookshelves, in a light light brown oak. A pastel rug in blood orange anchored the jumble of book backs and the light blue curtains and made the space feel somehow cohesive. Kacie dragged her to the day bed. ¡°We¡¯ll cuddle for a while,¡± Kacie said, ¡°and then you can tell me more about yourself properly.¡± The day bed had half a dozen pillows and at least two blankets on it, and looked absolutely fantastic to Claire right about now. ¡°That sounds great, miss,¡± Claire said, surprised with how little she minded her own sheepish tone. She felt cleaner now, for having gotten everything out, and some part of her that she couldn¡¯t quite understand had decided that showing that vulnerability, that submission, to at the very least Kacie and Jacqueline, was something she could do here. So she let herself be dragged to the bed, encased in her VPs arms, and put slowly back together. VI. Second Day [Week 1.2] Luna took a deep breath and tried to keep calm. Miriam had warned them about unusual education methods, but the shock of seeing that violence applied so suddenly and aggressively to Claire was difficult. And being sent away entirely¡­ Miriam stood at the front of the room, a cruel goddess enforcing her will. The look she gave them could stop a charging bull. ¡°I will be kind. I will take care of you. I will not tolerate a challenge to my authority.¡± She let out a breath, and looked just a bit more human again. ¡°Claire needs a kind of support right now that she cannot get in this lesson,¡± she said, ¡°her being sent out is not a punishment.¡± She twirled the cane in her hand. ¡°If one of you had done something similar, you would have been placed against the wall and caned, and then held and forgiven your mistake.¡± That wasn¡¯t¨Cactually somehow that did sound better. Maybe because the idea of Miriam being angry enough to send her away was worse than pain? Or maybe it was the forgiveness? Miriam didn¡¯t give them a chance to ask further questions, and Luna didn¡¯t want to risk her ire by interrupting. Instead, Allyson returned helped teach one of the most basic lessons: how to kneel. ¡°There¡¯s actually multiple forms to this,¡± Miriam explained, ¡°and yes, you will be expected to learn all of them.¡± She flashed a signal with her hand and Allyson floated to the ground. The motion was smooth, both legs at once with only a slight rocking motion as the senior servant got her feet underneath her butt. When she stopped moving, she sat with her knees together, palms flat on her thighs, toes touching in the back. Her back was straight, her shoulders pulled back, and her face tilted slightly down. Miriam tapped the shoulder with her cane. ¡°This is your everyday kneel, also called seiza. Notice how she¡¯s got good posture, but she isn¡¯t tense.¡± She kept walking around the kneeling supplicant. ¡°You¡¯ll find this hard at first, usually because your legs fall asleep or grow uncomfortable. Sometimes it¡¯s the feet.¡± She turned and faced them. ¡°Someone like Allyson can hold this position for hours.¡± Miriam snapped a finger and made another hand gesture. Allyson widened her legs, placed her palms up on them, and somehow radiated openness. Luna struggled to describe it, but it was enchanting. And attractive. ¡°It¡¯s in the slight rise of the chest,¡± Miriam answered, ¡°and in genuinely feeling the desire to give all of herself.¡± Luna nodded, then caught herself. It was spooky how fast Miriam ¡®reading their minds¡¯ was becoming normal for her. Miriam took a step forward, leaving Allyson behind her. ¡°Now you all try it.¡± Luna took a deep breath and tried to ignore the rising anxiety. How could she match that grace? What if her tucked bulge showed? She¡¯d just do her best. She tried sinking to her knees, lost her balance, and landed on her right hand. Persephone did it in one go¨Cnot as smoothly as Allyson, but still impressive. Becca looked smoother than Lunda had felt, but also slipped at the end. She wanted to try again, but Miriam was already walking over. She glanced at Allyson and tried to copy the way her legs and arms looked. Miriam stopped in front of her. Her face was friendly but stern. ¡°Much wider.¡± The cane gently tapped the inside of her thighs. Luna scooted her legs out a bit and got a disapproving shake of the head. Two more rapid taps, this time more painful. She tried a little more, but her bulge grew more prominent with every inch. The distress over her anatomy started to build. She couldn¡¯t, she couldn¡¯t, but she also couldn¡¯t find the words to say something. How do you tell someone you¡¯ve just met, who has so much power over you, about the part of you you despise the most? To bring attention to it¨Cby kneeling wider or by talking? Two more searing sharp lines, this time enough to make her flinch. She looked up with tears in her eyes. Miriam was already bent own, looking at her. The minder¡¯s eyes scanned down her face. The non-cane hand touched her neck. Luna felt Miriam stare into her soul. The gaze turned sympathetic, and she nodded. ¡°I¡¯m going to be stricter about this next week.¡± A brush of her hand through Luna¡¯s hair softened the blow. The minder rose without another word. Luna shook a little as Miriam moved towards Becca and Persephone. She felt like she¡¯d been seen through, though she didn¡¯t quite know how. The entire exchange had been distressing, but somehow Miriam had backed off when she couldn¡¯t anymore. And for that, Luna¡¯s entire being flooded with gratitude. Both Becca and Persephone got corrections. Becca for slouching her shoulders too far forwards, Persephone for not having her feet together in the back. But neither struggled as much as she had. Afterwards, Miriam drilled them between positions. Allyson showed it first, and did it with a grace that still took Luna¡¯s breath away. She felt like a fat drunk trying to repeat it, but Miriam stayed gentle with them. For now, all she enforced was getting the final position right, and over time that did actually become easier for them. Luna focused for the next twenty minutes, trying to reach Miriam¡¯s ever rising standard. She glanced at the others. Becca and Persephone looked so graceful already, and Luna¡¯s insecurity gave her another kick in the gut. She was so big and bulky, not small and cute¨C Miriam abruptly looked at her from across the room. The intensity of the gaze ran through Luna like a lightning bolt. ¡°Attention on me, Luna,¡± she rebuked, ¡°no getting lost in your head.¡± Once the adrenaline dissipated, Luna resolved to stay present. and spent the rest of the lesson trying to focus on drills and movement and subtle details instead of looking to her right, instead of thinking about how she felt about her body. It mostly worked. She lost herself in the motions, in the striving. There was something unifying, too, about spending that time trying to match Becca and Persephone and all the other Delta Sigma servants. It made her feel like part of something. The prespect of belonging clawed at her heart, demanding entry. It felt almost too good to be true. That made the end of the next hour come rather quickly. Miriam gave them some positive words and they put their street clothes back on. Luna slipped her regular pants over the yoga shorts instead. Miriam instructed them on the rest of their day. The whole time, Allyson knelt. She hadn¡¯t moved from her spot next to Miriam since the lesson wound down. Miriam ignored her and kept talking. ¡°Alright you three, good job today,¡± she spoke with a relaxed smile, ¡°from here you have some time to chill in the living room. If you brought homework, you¡¯re free to work on it, but we¡¯d gently encourage you to socialize as well. You¡¯ll be grabbed when it¡¯s your turn with Jacqueline.¡± They filed out. Luna looked back in as she closed the door¨CAllyson was kneeling against Miriam¡¯s leg, while Miriam gently played with her hair. Something about that¡­ a surge of want ran through Luna. She didn¡¯t linger and made it back down the stairs. She¡¯d barely had time to check her phone when Allison came downstairs. ¡°Slight schedule change,¡± she explained, ¡°Luna you¡¯re up.¡± There was a moment of anxiety, but if there was anything the last 24 hours had showed, it was that she was reasonably safe as long as she earnestly followed directions. ¡®Reasonably¡¯ and ¡®earnestly¡¯ weren¡¯t the greatest of safety blankets, but they¡¯d have to do. She followed Allyson up to one of the ¡°bedrooms¡± the sorority had converted into an office. The person awaiting her was as tall as she was and absolutely stunning. Luna felt a moment of envy, but it was washed away almost immediately the woman¡¯s radiant kindness. The cuff on her wrist marked her as a minder. Where Miriam was unpredictable, a barely contained box of energy, she projected a calm, gentle strength. Luna¡¯s lizard brain felt immediately more at ease. The room itself was appointed like a therapist¡¯s office. The minder sat in a comfy looking recliner with some suspiciously placed pillows on the floor next to it. Across from the recliner stood a long sofa in a modern grey color. There was also a desk tucked into a corner by the window. The room wasn¡¯t drowning in as many plants as the living room, but still held enough to make the space cozy. Luna was about to ask where to sit, but the minder, who she realized must be Jacqueline, preempted her with an open palmed gesture. ¡°Where would you feel most comfortable?¡± The sophomore sat on the couch before the subtext of the question caught up to her. That sitting on furniture wasn¡¯t just better¨Ca privilege reserved for minders to distribute¨Cthat she actually might feel more comfortable on the floor¡­ it didn¡¯t make sense at first. And then she remembered Allyson, at the end of ballet class. The bliss on her face, the comfort in Miriam¡¯s touch. Could she just¡­ have that here? Touch from this emblem of poise and strength and womanhood in front of her? She felt that desire again, but felt too awkward to move now. But she promised herself she would try next time. If Jacqueline had seen the conflict play out on her face, she didn¡¯t comment on it. Instead, she grabbed a clipboard from the small table next to her recliner. ¡°Before we can get to anything else, we need to have the conversation we were supposed to have this morning: What do you know about dominance and submission?¡± ¡°I¡¯m not the most online trans girl, but I¡¯ve been on discord.¡± That earned her a chuckle from Jacqueline, but she continued. ¡°It¡¯s a kink thing, where one person gives power to another. Kind of like being someone¡¯s pet. Miss.¡± ¡°That¡¯s not inaccurate.¡± Jacqueline smiled that disarming smile. ¡°And we do actually have a puppy that you¡¯ll get to meet sometime.¡± ¡°Dominance and submission, or D/s is the deliberate practice of giving and taking control. It¡¯s often also called power exchange, or sometimes authority transfer. Humans naturally give and take control¨Cthink about having an emotional breakdown at a party, and having a friend guide you to a private corner and hold you and take care of you.¡± Luna hadn¡¯t ever been close enough to people or community for that to happen, but she let Jacqueline continue. ¡°We do that, but more deliberately and more intensely. No one here is any less important, though some choose to see themselves that way. What Allyson does is just as important as what I do. We¡¯re two parts of a greater whole. But Allyson is comfortable serving and being directed, and I¡¯m comfortable providing strength and guidance.¡± Jacqueline stopped talking and seemed to expect some kind of response. Luna briefly flailed for something to say. ¡°That sounds cool, I guess?¡± ¡°Most people ask if this is some kind of sex thing,¡± Jacqueline redirected. Luna¡¯s eyes widened, and she stammered. ¡°Ahh, well, that makes sense too?¡± ¡°It¡¯s an interesting question because it definitely comes up in sex for most people,¡± Jacquline continued, and Luna realized she was probably getting something scripted¨Cor at least something the minder considered was important enough to force. ¡°But overall the answer is very much no. A friend of mine actually compared it to her experience transitioning¨Cfor most people sex is a part of it, and for some people sex is where they first notice that gender is a thing for them, but it¡¯s a pretty big investment to make given most of the time you won¡¯t be fucking.¡± Love this novel? Read it on Royal Road to ensure the author gets credit. Luna gave her the situationally appropriate chuckle, and Jaqueline went on. ¡°I¡¯d say we do it for comfort and for intimacy. For many people who end up here this is a more natural way of existing¨Cwe ask you about traumas for a reason. For others¡­ there¡¯s a closeness in this practice that¡¯s unmatched by anything else. We find that alignment and unity¡­ useful.¡± Luna found herself nodding, but finally figured out her question. ¡°I¡¯m still¡­ not clear on what exactly that means? Like I know I¡¯m supposed to listen when you tell me to do things, but it feels like this is supposed to go much deeper?¡± Jacqueline gave her that disarming smile again. ¡°Minders and servants are very general terms. I think someone a long time ago thought they were hot. You¡¯ll learn how you fit into this with time. But we are confident you¡¯ll fit into it. For now, your job is to be open, to let yourself be guided, to show deference, and to sink into the role we¡¯re shaping you for.¡± ¡°That doesn¡¯t really¡­¡± Luna trailed off. Jacqueline looked at the flower pot next to Luna as she thought. ¡°That¡¯s fair,¡± she ultimately said. ¡°Servants take direction, and focus their will around the minders. Minders give direction, and mold and guide the servants. I know that doesn¡¯t sound very different from what I¡¯ve already said, but that¡¯s because everyone here is so unique. Someone like Neha is a very different servant from one of our house pets.¡± She picked up the clipboard and added: ¡°Eventually, you¡¯ll figure out which one is right for you. Or someone else will.¡± She handed Luna the paperwork. ¡°This is a survey we regularly have our members take,¡± she explained, ¡°it covers everything from kinks to emotional needs to ¡®need-to-knows¡¯ for interacting with you.¡± The form was a whopping five pages. The first two were dedicated to understanding her emotional responses. How would she feel if she were gagged? What about being ignored? Being the center of attention? She wasn¡¯t sure how some of these were connected to what Jacqueline had been talking about at all, but tried to answer them honestly anyway. Then came a page asking about traumatic experiences, memories, triggers. Whether she¡¯d been in therapy. How she thought trauma impacted her interpersonal relationships. That page was easy: She just wrote ¡°TRANS¡± in big letters at the top. Then she thought better of it, and tried to go into the isolation being trans caused, the way it had come between her and her more conservative immigrant parents, the way she¡¯d had to hide it from her friends at Chinese school, and how even now she struggled. She tried to condense it into short bullet points, but it still spilled out of the provided lines and to the bottom of the page. There wasn¡¯t any room left, was this too much? Should she go on? Jacqueline had said to take guidance. She took a breath. ¡°You¡­ Do you want me to write more? Miss?¡± She asked. She showed Jacqueline the filled page on her clipboard. Jacqueline leant forward and scanned it quickly. ¡°You¡¯re not the first trans person we¡¯ve had, nor the only trans person currently in our little family. I think it¡¯s important we understand how your experience might be not typical or how other experiences might intersect with it. If you¡¯ve done that, no need for another page. We¡¯ll talk about it as well¨CI keep notes on everyone that you¡¯ll eventually also have access to.¡± ¡°Mmmmm,¡± Luna considered as she took the clipboard back, ¡°I already covered the Asian-American bit, I think this is fine?¡± The reassuring smile came back. ¡°Alright, continue then.¡± The next page was about her insecurities. Well that was going to be a long list. She started with her gender. Not being a real girl, not fitting in at a place like Delta Sigma, being accepted only as some kind of pity case. Then she moved on to her body. Feeling ugly compared to her peers, not being able to imagine ever being as pretty or graceful as someone like Allyson or Isabelle, being this giant square hunk of disgusting masculinity. That filled up half the page, and Luna wanted to crawl under a blanket and cry. But she needed to be comprehensive, so she kept going. She wrote about being weird, the way she sometimes missed social cues. Then she added a bit about being worried that she¡¯d missed some things, since she¡¯d only really been able to start working through things last year when she¡¯d finally been free of her childhood and able to start being herself, and honestly the school¡¯s mental health counselors weren¡¯t the most effective therapists in her experience either. She hoped that would be enough. Just in case she wrote ¡°insecure about not knowing all of my insecurities¡± at the bottom. Looking at the page was hard. Suppressing the desire to hide and weep was hard. She tried to keep going and made it to the last page. But it only had a single simple question. What are your strengths, and what do you want from your time in Delta Sigma? There was so much care in the question. Somehow that feeling combined with the pain of facing her insecurities. Luna still wanted to cry, but the urge to hide lessened. She might be safe here. Then the shame came back¡ªshe didn¡¯t know what to write. She stared at the page, frozen. Then she wrote ¡°Computers.¡± She couldn¡¯t leave it there, all alone. She dug deep, tried to find her one positive self thought. She thought about all the effort she¡¯d spent in the last year, transitioning and learning to be herself. Then she wrote ¡°I try very hard.¡± She thought another moment, and added ¡°Not having enough strengths¡± to her list of insecurities. What did she want from Delta Sigma? She thought for a moment, then realized at least that answer was easy. Belonging. Jacqueline gave her another one of her comforting smiles when she took the clipboard back. ¡°Good job on this Luna.¡± She briefly scanned through the pages. ¡°And don¡¯t worry, this form is only a small part of us getting to know you.¡± She glanced back up. ¡°We¡¯ll find your strengths.¡± They talked a bit about her answers, but very quickly it became time to Jacqueline to talk to Becca. Luna got ready to leave, but Jacqueline came over and pulled her up into a hug. The minder¡¯s right hand crawled up her back and pushed her head into the soft, fancy sweater covering Jacqueline¡¯s shoulder. The need to cry abated a little more. ¡°Welcome to the family, Luna,¡± Jacqueline said, ¡°you belong here, and you¡¯ll always belong here.¡± They stayed that way for a moment as the affirmation sank into Luna¡¯s soul. Other people¨Cher friends in the Mentors in STEM organization for example¨Chad said plenty of nice things to her. But this felt more real somehow, more significant. Maybe because of her earlier vulnerability? Maybe because of the way Jacqueline held her, like nothing could make her let go? Maybe the position of authority that Jacqueline now held in her life made the affirmation more powerful? She¡¯d hopefully understand someday, but for now she basked in the warmth of her superior. Jacqueline gently released her and guided her towards the door. She opened the door for her as well, then handed her off to Allyson, who was already there with an anxious looking Becca. They traded charges, and Allyson guided Luna back to the living room. The future minders had come back from their morning activity as well. What happened next was automatic, instinctive. Luna didn¡¯t even really think about it. There was just a pillow, and Diana¡¯s leg, and¨Cexhausted from her meeting with Jacqueline¨CLuna just plopped down onto it and leaned against Diana. It wasn¡¯t until Diana started petting her head that she¡¯d realized what she¡¯d done. She¡¯d repeated last night¡ªthe way they¡¯d sat during the movie. She¡¯d done the thing she feared in her meeting with Jacqueline. And in doing she¡¯d given vulnerability, given submission. Just like Jacqueline had described earlier. And just like last night, Diana wasn¡¯t rejecting her. She dared a glance up. The future Minder was lost in her calculus homework, the petting just as idle and instinctive as Luna sitting on the floor cushion. It felt good. She leaned over to grab her backpack, took out her homework, and started going through her algorithms assignment. The next two hours passed in a comfortable blur as new members came and went from their one-on-one meetings. There was little conversation¨Ceveryone had too much homework¨Cbut the shared space and communal energy were absolutely enchanting. It felt so casual, so easy. It was everything Luna had been missing in her life. At 5pm it was time for her last agenda item, a meeting with Neha where they would discuss her schedule. Isabelle found her a few minutes before and lead her to another converted office. This one was smaller and lacked a couch. Instead, it contained a much larger desk, with a very formal looking Neha sitting behind it, and a single chair. On the wall was a picture of the Delta Sigma house and some abstract art. An all-in-one printer sat in the corner, completing the professional look. Neha wore the same blazer and slacks combination she¡¯d worn at every other moment in the initiation so far, though today she wore an extra ribbon on her neck. Last time it had only been her plain black collar. Luna imagined this was what a lawyer¡¯s office would feel like. Someone had apparently agreed, because there was a certificate hanging by the wall confirming that Neha was a ¡°Very Good Calendar Manager¡± signed by at least ten different names. As she walked up to the chair, she saw a printed copy of her schedule already laid out on the desk. Whether or not the certificate was meant as humiliation, Neha evidently took it seriously. Neha flipped her laptop shut as Luna sat down. The servant-manager gave her an almost impersonal smile. ¡°Hello miss, welcome to your first scheduling session.¡± Neha hadn¡¯t talked much during their introduction, or in the brief time they¡¯d spent as new members. Her tone was crisp, professional, and carried exactly the inflection and cadence she expected from a personal assistant. It had to be deliberate. ¡°I¡¯ve already been in touch with the school and you¡¯ve been placed in an ASL class that will meet three times a week, miss.¡± Neha pointed to boxes on the calendar with her pen as she spoke. ¡°Twice during the week and once on the weekend you¡¯ll also have Ballet and Etiquette here at the house. You¡¯re scheduled for once a week with both myself¡ªthat¡¯s this session¡ªas well as Miriam. You¡¯ll be attending a personal training session once a week, and go to the gym two more times besides that.¡± She waited for for Luna to absorb. When Luna said nothing, she put her pen down. ¡°Session with Jacqueline are not on your calendar, miss, but you can request them and we¡¯ll fit them in. As you can see the rest of your time is divided between classwork, time with Delta Sigma, and recuperation.¡± Luna sat there in a daze. Miriam had mentioned this would happen, but that didn¡¯t at all prepare her for the reality of it. Everything was here, her entire life, set out hour by hour in explicit detail. ¡°Any questions, miss?¡± Neha asked. ¡°Umm, this doesn¡¯t have any time on it for Mentors in STEM.¡± Neha made a professionally concerned face. ¡°I¡¯m sorry, miss, I wasn¡¯t aware you were still participating in that club. Generally we ask that our members spend their pledge semester focusing on Delta Sigma, but if you have major existing obligations we can work around that.¡± Luna grimaced and looked away. ¡°I¡¯m their treasurer.¡± ¡°I see,¡± Neha said. She shuffled some papers around and summoned a notepad. She placed her pen on it, then looked up at Luna. ¡°I do have to ask, miss, is there a particular reason you failed to mention them in your rush week packet?¡± Luna¡¯s cheeks turned red. ¡°I hadn¡¯t agreed to do it yet then.¡± She squirmed in her seat a little. Neha had been jotting notes, but now she was just looking at her. The silence felt awkward to Luna, intimidating even, but then again so many things did. It didn¡¯t seem to bother Neha. ¡°Alright,¡± the secretary finally said, ¡°we¡¯ll add them to the calendar this week, but understand that this is not a settled issue from our side, miss.¡± Luna nodded, still staring at the table. Neha pushed the copy of the schedule to her. It had pen annotations covering two two hour blocks for Mentors in STEM. One was during their weekly meeting time, the other was marked ¡°treasurer business.¡± ¡°You¡¯ll receive an invite to a google calendar that will have all of this digitally as well, miss. That¡¯s all for today, miss.¡± Neha reopened her laptop and stopped paying Luna any attention. Luna drifted back into the living room. She mechanically tortured some homework while she tried to process. There was the strange attitude, the rigorous schedule, the contrast with Jacqueline. It all sort of buzzed in her skull. Eventually it became clear ¡®weird things just happen here¡¯ was as far as she was going to get, and she did her best to dive back into algorithms. Gradually, others headed home, finished their evenings, but the idea of leaving, of going back to her dorm room alone, it felt wrong somehow. She¡¯d have to be brave. Eventually it was only her and Persephone as pledges¨Cshe seemed to have gotten lost in an essay and completely missed that others were leaving. Luna poked her head up from her math textbook to stare at Isabelle. The older servant sat at the corner desk, working, but she didn¡¯t seem absorbed. ¡°Would you like to come with, miss?¡± she tried, ¡°I¡¯m going to head back to the Southside dorms.¡± None of the other upper classmen were around. It was just Isabelle, watching them while she did her own homework. Miriam and Neha must still be around somewhere as well¨Cshe hadn¡¯t seen them leave. But they weren¡¯t here to ask. Isabelle smiled at her, a completely normal, disarming smile. ¡°I still have some duties at the house, but if you¡¯d like I¡¯ll ask for Miriam¡¯s permission?¡± Luna smiled and nodded. Not a rejection. She prodded Persephone and invited her as well. The fellow freshman was as interested in making upperclassmen friends as she was, and so a few minutes later their group was ready to leave. They headed out the door, Isabelle walking a strange sort of zigzag through the front yard of the sorority house. Luna decided not to ask, and stuck to a safer topic: ¡°How¡¯d you end up at Delta Sigma?¡± The junior looked thoughtful for a moment, staring at an object above them that wasn¡¯t really there. ¡°I guess I wanted a place to belong and feel safe. Not so different from everybody else, I think?¡± Luna nodded and mentally kicked herself. That question had been a conversational dead end. Luckily Persephone picked things up for her. ¡°What was hardest, back when you were a new member?¡± ¡°Understanding that I could let go,¡± the senior minder said, ¡°and that they would catch me.¡± There was a moment of silence. Luna had expected¨Cand she imagined Perse as well¨Csomething about schedules, or the difficulty of needing to serve more senior members, or maybe Miriam¡¯s very particular demands in ballet. ¡°What¡­¡± Luna searched for words. ¡°What does that mean?¡± Isabelle just smiled. ¡°You¡¯ll see.¡± ¡ª The next morning, Luna woke up to find a package sitting in her room. Once again there was no sign of forced entry. This time she¡¯d actually been in the room too. Did Delta Sigma employ ghosts? She expected to feel more distress, but Isabelle or Jacqueline looking over her in her sleep¡­ it sounded kind of cute. She grabbed her bathrobe to go shower, but first she paused to open it. It was a set of gaffs from an Etsy shop. Someone¡ªprobably Allyson or Miriam¡ªhad noticed her discomfort around tucking. Shower forgotten, she tried them on right away. They fit perfectly. They looked exactly like regular underwear from the outside and gave her a smoother front than anything she¡¯d tried herself. She almost couldn¡¯t believe it. No more bulge. The waves of acceptance and gratitude and being seen and belonging and acceptance bubbled up through her like an unending geyser, and she barely managed to text Miriam her gratitude before the tears started to fall. They¡¯d get her vulnerability, her loyalty, all of it. They¡¯d get everything, if they could keep making her feel like this. Feel accepted, appreciated, loved. She got ready for the day, almost floating through her morning routine. For her final step, she went to pick up her white collar. And somehow it almost seemed to glow a little bit blue. VII. First Week [Week 1.7] Five days in and Luna thought she might be getting her bearings, at least a little. She spent most of her time outside class at the house on Northside. Sometimes she¡¯d dare to sit at Diana¡¯s feet, but she hadn¡¯t managed to repeat that feat with anyone else, so mostly she sat by herself at one of the desks or on an open couch. When she couldn¡¯t find someone to ask permission, there was a nice little corner with some blankets next to one of the desks. It made a surprisingly cozy nook. She appreciated that Diana let her sit beneath her, and even humored her with touch and affirmations sometimes, but she didn¡¯t want to be too much of a bother. Especially when Persephone sought Diana¡¯s attention as well¡ªLuna didn¡¯t want to keep the two of them apart when they clearly fit together so much better. Ballet was great though. Miriam was scary, but she had already noticed herself moving more smoothly. She wanted to push herself and grow even faster. At night, in the short unscheduled block before she was supposed to sleep, she¡¯d practice in her dorm sometimes. The mirror there wasn¡¯t as good as the ballet room, but honestly seeing less of herself was kind of better. There was also something beautiful about it, like the extra effort was a reaffirmation of her own dedication. At least Miriam had become more predictable. The minder hadn¡¯t lied¡ªas long as Luna followed instructions, she didn¡¯t get into severe trouble. She might get pain, she might get corrections, but she also got comfort and support when she needed it. Somehow Miriam always knew which she currently needed. All in all things were going surprisingly well. It was nice illusion, one that fell away when she walked into the engineers and mentors meeting. President T¡ªshe still didn¡¯t know his name, and it was way too late to ask¡ªcaught her at her spot near the front of the room. ¡°Hey! You¡¯re not responding to your messages as fast as you used to¡ªwhat¡¯s up?¡± ¡°Oh, well¡ª¡± could she say that the time she was allowed to ¡®be distracted¡¯ by EAM had been limited to very precise time slots? No¡ª ¡°I¡¯ve just been really busy! I¡¯m rushing a sorority this year.¡± ¡°You, a sorority?¡± Ollie, one of their project leads, scoffed. ¡°Ye¡ªyes.¡± Suddenly Luna was back in grade school again. She¡ª she needed to advocate for herself. To stand up. That¡¯s what it meant to survive in the real world¡ªDelta Sigma had made her forget. She took a breath, gathered herself. ¡°I¡¯m exploring new things, alright? And I¡¯m sure you know how busy the first few weeks of sorority life are.¡± Ollie didn¡¯t look impressed. ¡°You¡¯re a treasurer now. You need to have priorities.¡± ¡°Yes¡ª¡± Luna desperately looked everywhere else. ¡°You¡¯ll make more time, right?¡± T gave her a soft, almost beseeching look. It was a proton torpedo into Luna¡¯s exhaust shaft. ¡°Yes¡­ sure. I¡¯ll¡­ answer my messages more often.¡± Fuck. She spent the rest of the meeting wondering how she would ask Neha. ¡ª Friday was her first sign language class. They¡¯d be three times a week¡ªMonday/Wednesday/Friday¡ªbut, as late transfers, Luna and the other future servants needed to attend a makeup session first. There was something odd about it¡ªthere were eight people in the makeup session and six were from Delta Sigma. Still, the class itself was interesting, though she wasn¡¯t entirely sure why they were doing it. Claire had suggested maybe they were actually going to become top secret spies, and needed to communicate silently. It was as good as anyone¡¯s guess. When they got back to the house on Northside around lunchtime, Luna decided to try being just a little bit more forward. There was the usual single servant downstairs, watching them at a separate desk in the corner of the living room. She¡¯d worked hard to remember everyone¡¯s names when Arie had asked on the first day, and she was pretty sure this one was Elya. Luna wasn¡¯t sure how to show the proper respect, so she decided to practice a motion from ballet class. She walked over to the desk, placed her righ foot before her left, and did her very best to sink smoothly into a kneel. It was almost great. She bumped her right leg against the side of the desk and wobbled as she corrected it. Elya didn¡¯t seem to mind though, she just looked down at her, smiled in a disarming way, and tilted her head in question. The move showed off her black choker, and the little ribbon that decorated it today. Luna looked for the words. ¡°I had a curiosity, may I ask about it?¡± Elya nodded, so Luna continued. ¡°Why are we learning sign language? I don¡¯t dislike it, or have objections, and of course I¡¯ll do whatever I¡¯m ordered. But if permitted I would like to know.¡± Elya laughed without making a sound, a motion so feminine and cute Luna almost exploded. Luna realized she¡¯d never heard her voice. Then, Elya pointed at herself. ¡°You want us to?¡± Luna asked. ¡°But you¡¯re a servant.¡± Elya smiled and shook her head. She made a flurry of hand signs. Luna looked at her in confusion. ¡°You¡ªoooooohhhhhhh.¡± She turned three shades redder. ¡°I am so so so so sorry.¡± Elya made a sign Luna recognized as ¡®no¡¯, then gave her a pat on the head. That motion turned into rubbing her scalp and scratching behind her ears. Luna reached her fourth shade as the pleasure of being petted mixed with the embarrassment. She was kneeling on the ground, being treated like a dog, and she liked it. She stayed there for another moment, then made an awkward but hasty retreat to one of the couches. Elya eyes followed her, still smiling. The senior servant didn¡¯t push further, and when she went back to her work, Luna breathed a sigh of relief. Stolen from Royal Road, this story should be reported if encountered on Amazon. She worked on her essay for another hour before Diana and Persephone poked her, Becca in tow. Diana gave her that welcoming smile. ¡°Hey! We¡¯re going to walk to the cafe on Newton Street, grab some coffee. Want to join us?¡± Luna nodded as fast as she could, mouth suddenly dry. She fumbled her laptop back into her backpack, began picking it up, then remembered this was the Delta Sigma house. If it got stolen here¡­ She decided to leave it. The four of them walked out of the house and began the four block treck to the cafe. ¡°So, what do ya¡¯ll think so far?¡± Persephone asked from her position at the front, next to Diana. Becca was slightly behind the two of them, and Luna made up the rear. ¡°Becca?¡± Becca blushed, something she seemed to do every time someone addressed her. ¡°I¡­ it¡¯s really nice?¡± They turned right at a stop sign a block from campus and started heading downhill. ¡°It¡¯s definitely interesting.¡± Diana nodded. ¡°Not quite what I expected from a sorority, but it feels really good.¡± ¡°What¡ª what sort of things are you all learning?¡± Becca asked. Diana tilted her head and stretched her mouth to the right as she thought. ¡°Power. How to express it. Observation. How to read people.¡± The future minder smirked. ¡°We talk about you four a lot.¡± Persephone rubbed herself against Diana¡¯s shoulder like a cat. ¡°Oh yeah, what do you say about us?¡± There was something incredibly sensuous and open about the gesture, almost teasing, and Luna found herself wishing she could be so bold. Diana patted Persephone¡¯s head, but didn¡¯t stop her. ¡°That¡¯s not for you to know, little minx.¡± She suddenly turned. ¡°Luna, what do you think so far?¡± ¡°It¡¯s nice?¡± Luna began. ¡°I¡¯m, ummm, I¡¯m very grateful.¡± ¡°Gratitude is an interesting reaction,¡± Persephone chimed. ¡°Though Miriam would probably appreciate it.¡± Becca nodded. ¡°I understand. I feel grateful too.¡± They reached the small shopping district containing the cafe. ¡°District¡± was a bit of a bold term, given that it was really just a single street, about four blocks long, with a few shops stretching just a little up the side streets into the adjacent residential area. ¡°It¡¯s not just the normal ¡®wow they¡¯re so cool¡¯ thing,¡± Luna explained. ¡°I think, especially with the gender thing, I feel understood here in a way that I haven¡¯t elsewhere.¡± They reached the coffee shop, an outdoor cafe with half a dozen tables, surrounding a small window for ordering. They continued their conversation in line. ¡°That makes sense actually,¡± Diana said, ¡°they¡¯re already teaching us to be more observant.¡± Persephone rubbed herself against Diana again. ¡°You can observe me any time.¡± ¡°Perse, how much coffee have you already had today?¡± Diana¡¯s tone was suddenly sharp, and Becca and Luna both flinched. Persephone did not, though. ¡°Mmmm, three cups.¡± ¡°You¡¯re getting a chai.¡± The future servant closed her eyes, suddenly more relaxed, an expression of bliss on her face. ¡°Yes, miss¡± ¡°Sorry for that interruption.¡± Diana turned to the other two. ¡°Becca, did you have something else you wanted to add?¡± ¡°Mmmm.¡± Becca spent a moment looking everywhere but Diana¡¯s face. ¡°For me, it¡¯s that it¡¯s okay for me to be quiet here. I don¡¯t like talking a lot of the time, and facial expressions and human interactions are kind of weird. I like it when I just get to be.¡± They each picked up the coffees. Persephone subtly led the group towards the tables. ¡°Want to sit here for a few mins? Just catch up?¡± Diana nodded. ¡°That sounds fun. You may all sit, by the way.¡± Luna shot her a grateful look and took one of the chairs. ¡°That still feels kind of weird.¡± ¡°I think it¡¯s meant to¡­ reinforce something?¡± Becca said. Persephone stirred a helping of sugar into her chai. ¡°I wouldn¡¯t be surprised if it grows into more later. I¡¯ve been reading about kink online for the last few days and this feels very much like someone in Delta Sigma is very into a thing called ¡®protocol¡¯.¡± Diana blessed her with a smile. ¡°That¡¯s actually how Miriam referred to it in one of our classes too. It¡¯s supposed to change how we all think, a little.¡± Luna shivered, but couldn¡¯t find anything to say. Becca looked just as silent. ¡°It¡¯s definitely made me more thoughtful,¡± Persephone eventually said. ¡°How are the rest of the minders holding up with it?¡± ¡°I think Arie enjoys the power but doesn¡¯t care about the protocol,¡± Diana said. ¡°She got the whole ¡®projecting control in your posture thing¡¯ down way faster than myself or Riga. Riga seems just totally unflappable.¡± ¡°Ummmm, does she like us?¡± Becca asked. Her eyes were wide, even more anxious than usual. Diana¡¯s brow furrowed. ¡°Why wouldn¡¯t she?¡± ¡°I just¡­ it¡¯s probably just my anxiety but it¡¯s very easy to be close to you. Arie is kind of scary, that¡¯s sort of their thing, but with Riga I just feel so confused. She seems relaxed but I also feel pushed away.¡± She hid her face in her latte. ¡°I¡¯m probably just making it up.¡± Persephone nodded. ¡°I don¡¯t feel it as strongly as you but I get some of that? Maybe?¡± She suddenly looked right at Luna. ¡°How do you feel?¡± ¡°I¡¯m¡­¡± She took a deep breath. She needed to overcome her social anxiety better. This wasn¡¯t a space for her to hide. ¡°To be honest, I¡¯m a little scared of everyone. I feel like I¡¯ve been invited into some queer temple of womanhood and I¡¯m trying not to bump any of the vases or accidentally mar the polished floors.¡± Persephone stirred her drink some more, suddenly choosing words carefully. ¡°A friend of mine in high school once said her biggest fear was bringing in some kind of masculine energy, so let me just say you¡¯re definitely not carrying any of that. You¡¯re obviously still new to this¡­ but so are we to the weirder shit that DS does.¡± Becca nodded. ¡°You¡ª You¡¯re nice. I like that.¡± ¡°I see you as a baby chick, more than anything else,¡± Diana admitted. ¡°Still finding your wings, still a little unsure of your footing.¡± ¡°That¡¯s what we should call her, baby chick!¡± Persephone made a motion like she wanted to jump out of her chair, and promptly bumped the table with her knee. Diana shook her head, but she was smiling. ¡°Okay, but getting back to Riga: she¡¯s only said positive things about everyone¡ªI obviously wouldn¡¯t betray her trust by saying details. But she¡¯s not from the west coast, it might just be cultural. She definitely likes you all.¡± Somehow getting it all out and just having it¡­ accepted made it easier. That moved the conversation away from the feelings she didn¡¯t understand, and they spent the next ten minutes talking about their ¡®regular¡¯ lives, before walking back to the Northside house. The conversation tipped back to pledging as they prepared to dive back into their world. ¡°How have you all been liking your ballet classes?¡± Diana asked them. ¡°I think it¡¯s so cool!¡± Persephone definitely hadn¡¯t needed more coffee. ¡°There¡¯s all this ritual and ceremony and things to learn and these fun different interactions and have you seen how Allyson and Miriam look at each other? Or just the way Jacqueline talks or Neha¡¯s careful controlled protocol? It¡¯s all soooo amazing.¡± ¡°I really like it,¡± Luna agreed. ¡°It¡¯s so comfortable and I already look so much more graceful. I¡¯ve been practicing in the mirror.¡± ¡°Baby chick, you need to be like twenty percent less stiff, then you¡¯ll get the kneeling thing. You¡¯re clenched up so tight you can¡¯t move smoothly.¡± The name ran through Luna like hot shower. ¡°Uhhh, thank you Perse.¡± There was something simultaneously embarrassing and affirming about it. Luna decided to embrace it. Suddenly one of her eyes flashed blue, like a cloudy glass lens had appeared in front of her right eye. Then it was gone again. She almost dropped the coffee, but then looked around. Nothing was wrong. Diana began to turn, seeing her freeze, but Luna hurried on to catch up, and the future minder said nothing. Claire and Arie had returned to the house while they were outjoined the study group later in the afternoon. They shared the couch furthest from the door, shoulder to shoulder on their laptops. Luna was glad, they seemed to understand each other in a way that the others couldn¡¯t quite match. Claire always looked a little more relaxed around Arie, somehow immune to the fear that both Luna and Becca felt. Maybe with enough lessons in ballet or sessions with Miriam Luna would learn to put a word on it, but for now she was just glad that no one was being left out. VII. ??? [Week 2.??] Frankie ran a hand over her cuff and adjusted her slacks. The firm oval leaves of the shrub she crouched behind were soft to the touch, but she still kept a good foot between her and the bush. The bark of these California shrubs was rough and inflexible, and she didn¡¯t want to rip anything. One of the first lessons of ¡°creeping in the bushes¡± was that hiding behind the bushes was just as effective. She was suffering from not enough sleep, not enough caffein, not enough cuddle time with her pet. But the kits needed to be watched and so duty called. The kits in question sat in the cafeteria 30 feet away, eating lunch and chattering about freshman things, unaware of the wider world around them. Ignorant of the very thing that was even now beginning to flow through them. This was always the time they were most vulnerable. When they were close enough to be seen, but not close enough to see. Close enough to be attacked, but not close enough to defend themselves. Like blind little kittens tapping around in the dark, dependent on their mother for protection. Frankie saw herself as more of tom cat, but she would be their protector all the same. Keeping them in a separate house helped, but not as much as people often thought. After all, the the Northside house had it¡¯s own resonating ritual in the basement. All it achieved was changing them more slowly, to allow their bodies and spirits to keep up better, and to ensure that any danger came from their own development, not from whatever was going down at the DS house that week. It meant none of them were likely to get picked off by a stick walker, but she¡¯d eat a hat if they didn¡¯t deal with at least one or two lesser threats before initiation. Frankie snuck another bite of her sandwich, then brushed the crumbs off her leather jacket. A quick sweep of her blue ringed eyes told her nothing noteworthy was within 500 feet of them, and she went back to watching the kits. They were still sitting in the cafeteria¨Cand thank god they¡¯d managed to schedule the whole lot into the same lunch slot this year. Luna, in particular, was already subtly glowing. Enough that Frankie found it concerning. Persephone and Diana had a little hue as well. Anything at all this soon was extremely promising, but she¡¯d need to keep an extra eye on them. Even with accelerated growth, it would take weeks before she could sense them the same way she could the rest of the sisterhood. It was a sacred duty. All seven of them held so much potential. Across the lawn and inside the cafeteria her enhanced eyes she could see Arie making a joke. Becca did that shy little giggle, the one that almost seemed to shrink her into herself. Persephone laughed, and Diana smiled at her. Claire seemed enraptured by Arie¡¯s presence, and even Luna poked out of her shell a little. Riga glared, maybe the joke was about her? Hmmm, Claire, arguably their most difficult case, had been leaning into Arie the entire lunch. And it looked like Arie was reciprocating as well. Mousy Becca and Persephone had both grown closer to Diana. Riga and Luna had a good chat earlier. On the whole Miriam had nailed it¨Cthe batch was meshing well. Mandy would have to deflate her ego again soon. Frankie finished her sandwich just as lunch ended. The group broke up as everyone headed to their next activities. Frankie sent a quick text to Sarah before digging her backpack out of the mulch and following her assignments for the rest of the day. Claire and Diana were headed to a study group for their introduction to computer science class. Luna was going to be studying next door and Persephone¡¯s engineering lecture that was close enough to be safely within Franke¡¯s coverage. Sarah would cover the rest, likely with assistance from Elya. Not a small commitment of manpower. Every year it was tempting to leave one or two people uncovered for just that brief, hour long window they spent in a lecture on the wrong corner of campus. Every year the next generation collectively put on their big girl pants and decided not to be lazy. The threats to their community did not care about convenience. And the clusterfuck at the house last weekend had demonstrated that those threats were growing, and that even the main house wasn¡¯t as protected as they wanted to think. So they¡¯d spend the next few weeks bored but alert. At least the walk between the cafeteria and the engineering buildings was a particularly nice one. They passed by DeLarverie Hall, through the smooth hill of Johnson Library Glade, and headed uphill to the northern edge of campus. Frankie had just entered the engineering quad when she sensed the presence. A resonance, but not resonating with her. It could be a coincidence. In her gut she knew it wasn¡¯t. It could be an accident. In her gut she knew it wasn¡¯t. It could be peaceful. Frankie started walking faster. This was either deliberate encroachment, meant to prove a point, or it was hostile activity, and the perpetrator didn¡¯t care if they were seen. Either demanded a swift response. Thanks to months partnered with Samie and Kevin. Frankie knew she had a few advantages. One was an unusually high detection range. In all likelihood she¡¯d noticed them first, so getting a long distance visual was now a priority. She eyed the facade of the East Asian Library. It had the height, and the decorative concrete facade should be climbable enough. She touched her cuff, then spent a moment reflecting¨Con her devotion to her sisters and their house, on Samie¡¯s unquestionable devotion to her, on the devotion and control she gave back in return. She reflected on how they shared her will, then cast it into the universe. Unseen; Unnoticed; Ignored. A shiver passed through her as the universe responded. Frankie set her sights on the building. She¡¯d already used magic for visibility, so the climb would need to be all skill. Fortunate then that Frankie had a lot of practice getting places she shouldn¡¯t. She walked until she found an inside corner connecting an elevator shaft to the main building. Three steps, bounce off one wall, up the other, and a quick grab. One pull-up later, a foot jammed into some concrete, and she was spider climbing up facade. There was a slight lip between the top of the facade and the roof, so Frankie got a good grip on the edge and swung a leg up. The rest was easy. Once she was up, she allowed herself a satisfied glance down. Easily three and a half stories. Enough to hurt herself if she¡¯d fucked up, but also enough to get a visual advantage on whatever moron was infringing on her turf. She grabbed a pair of the binoculous out of the patrol backpack and walked to the other side of the roof. There were still a few tall trees, but if she got her distance and heading right, her target should walk through her sightline in one of the downhill glades at any moment¡­ There. Man, mid-to-late 30s, trying for unassuming clothing. Unadorned baseball cap¨Ca poor choice on a campus where no student would ever wear one. He wore a casual dress shirt, buttoned up all the way. The button up though¡­ Frankie looked for the telltale golden talisma¨C Fuck. Her hunch on encroachment was right. Someone from the Redemption Church. They definitely knew who this area belonged to. And while Delta Sigma wasn¡¯t carrying out operations against them, ¡°infidel fuckpuddle of kinky sorority sisters¡± definitely did not make their acceptable people list. This could only be trouble. A quick picture on her phone and a message to the rest of the sorority. They¡¯d sense if Frankie was in danger, but the details were standard operating protocol. Even as she put her phone away, she already felt a few distant souls change course towards her. Prudent of them. This could escalate. Even just being here the believer was already disrupting their resonance, their space, and Frankie did not want to find out what he would do if he reached his destination. It was high time to go say hello. She climbed back down the facade, this time on the southern side of the building, and approached her target. They weren¡¯t exactly close to either Delta Sigma house, but they were certainly closer than any of the church¡¯s outposts, so she could expect an advantage from their resonance as well. She slinked her way closer. She should have easily another 100 ft before he sensed her. It took another minute, then Frankie felt a slight immaterial ding. He¡¯d finally noticed. Surprisingly, he didn¡¯t speed up or turn around. Instead he turned directly towards here. It almost looked like he wanted to go on the offense, except this far into Delta Sigma turf, alone? It was suicide. Find this and other great novels on the author''s preferred platform. Support original creators! She had about 250 feet left to figure things out, then he¡¯d be on top of her. Or hopefully she¡¯d be on top of him. Still, as she passed downhill towards the Chancellor¡¯s office, she couldn¡¯t stop wondering. Why approach on her home turf? It was hard to directly attack another practitioner by yourself, especially outside a locus of power. The void responded to shared will, to unity. A single person could not muster that, could not raise their voice above the din of all the humanity around them. At best, one could do minor magics like blessings and enchantments. That¡¯s why Frankie volunteered for these sorts of assignments; because where she was from, you learned other methods of direct engagement. Had the Church sent some kind of ex-military? He chose a slight diagonal, and Frankie took a left into one of the larger campus glades to intercept. Two minutes later and they made eye contact in a small glade. Trees shielded them from most passing traffic. They were alone¨Cgood for more complex magic. She hoped it wouldn¡¯t come to that. She touched her cuff again, then paused for a moment to reflect¨Con her unending love for Samie, on her love and loyalty to her fellow sisters, on their shared purpose protecting this institution and creating a more tolerant world. This person in front of her opposed that shared purpose. Let him try to oppose her will. She shouted her defiance into the great void, and shaped her request. Swiftness, luck, and lethality, for whatever might happen next. The steps came easier as forces from beyond this world assisted her. She palmed her knife as they approached each other. A quick flick, a twist of the wrist, and the blade was hidden but ready. No reason to be threatening if this didn''t need to escalate. She stopped fifteen feet away. ¡°Hello! You wouldn¡¯t happen to have a class here today, would you?¡± The man shook his head. ¡°Your people were in our territory last week,¡± he shouted, ¡°they crossed south of 51st street. I have been sent to deliver a warning.¡± Something about this felt off, and Frankie felt her tension surge. ¡°I certainly don¡¯t recall anyone in your territory in the last few days.¡± She took a step back. ¡°and a warning could have come over text message, no?¡± He didn¡¯t respond, but reached into his backpack for¨Cfuck¨Cfor a stone tablet. Frankie let the fight or flight wash over her. Her sisters would feel it. Samie would know something was wrong. Then it was time to control the adrenaline, to put those hard earned survival skills to the test. She didn¡¯t know what the Church had inscribed onto the tablet, but there wasn¡¯t a snowball¡¯s chance in hell that it was something pleasant. The stone was thick¨Clikely a complicated ritual then. Lots of effort. Disaster? Reduction of influence? Without know why the church had suddenly decided to launch a direct strike¨Cno to start a war, because they would respond and the Church had to know that¨Cit was impossible to know what the strike would be. Annihilation? Resonance disruption? A widespread disaster? The believer chucked the tablet on the ground, and Frankie felt time slow to a crawl. A piercing wail erupted from the shards of the tablet, and it clicked¨Cthis was a simple screamer, meant to shout into the void and draw as much as possible back towards it. It was simple¡ªwhich meant with so much energy put into the tablet it was going to be extremely loud. And the way her ears were hurting¨Cfuck this could actually draw a stick walker. She did not need a giant six legged lovecraftian spider monster with street signs for legs in her life right now. The lonely location had been a trap. They frequently debated on how much of magic¡¯s function was intelligent and how much was guided by natural laws, but either way magic abhorred visibility to humans who didn¡¯t already have rimmed eyes. To people who were normal, magic acted subtly and indirectly. A normal person stabbed by the long thin spear of a stick walker¡¯s leg might get sick later that evening, might die in a car accident, might lose years of their life to a chronic illness. A practitioner stabbed by a stick walker leg would bleed to death from a giant fucking puncture wound right in their gut. This applied to indirect evidence too: a stick walker in a crowd would walk carefully, leaving surfaces and buildings intact to avoid secondary evidence of its presence. A stick walker in an empty grove with two practitioners? It would go on a rampage. Humans would find some other explanation for the damage later. For a second Frankie considered drawing whatever the screamer brought out to a crowded place. But that would limit her own flexibility as well, and it¡¯s not like the innocent bystanders were safe. She didn¡¯t want more blood on her hands. If she was lucky it would be just a skitterer, but then when was the last time she¡¯d been lucky? The back of her mind screamed, as two entities came from the god-knows-where of the void and appeared on top of the stone. A skitterer and a stick walker. Yep. Extremely unlucky. Whatever newbie idiot the church sent hadn¡¯t considered that whatever he summoned would not care for friend or foe, and so in the 10 seconds since the tablet had broken he¡¯d only taken half a dozen steps back. Unfortunately, half a dozen human steps was just about the stride length of a stick walker, and stride the stick walker did, right through his torso. It was surprisingly clean, the scream surprisingly short as the diaphragm got pierced, the blood and guts parting for the spiked otherworldly leg. For a single timeless moment the believer tried, briefly, futily, to pull the ten feet of black chromatic skewer out of his guts, and end his life as something other than a human shish kebab. Then he died. This now upped Frankie¡¯s ¡°fatalities witnessed¡± count to three, and meant another long conversation with Jacqueline to check on her mental health. Being annoyed about that was a great distraction from the horror of what she¡¯d just seen. Frankie intended to be irreverent and sarcastic at least long enough to survive this, or to escape Delta Sigma¡¯s mental health practitioner into the afterlife. Fortunately Frankie had been a little smarter than the nitwit-on-a-stick and used the time after the tablet shattered to grab her nightstick from her backpack. Now she thought about how much she cared about this campus and the people on it and how really it was an extension of herself, which meant she really deserved the strength to protect it and wouldn¡¯t the universe just listen?! The universe did, and the nightstick became the void magic equivalent of a broadsword wielded on hallowed ground. She spun it once, and it sliced through the air with grace, guided by her hand and ethereal instinct. In any other situation it would have made her feel strong. But in this metaphor the skitterer was a hell-sent pickup truck with jaws, and the stick walker something straight out of War of the Worlds. She started building distance as she considered her plan. A stickwalker and a skitterer¨Cunlikely to actually collaborate, but they wouldn¡¯t fight each other. She wasn¡¯t carrying any additional artifacts¨Cfancy wards or extra power from the house. All she had were the wards inscribed in her cuff and a pendant Samie had made her that Kevin had put some kind of unclear blessings on. Magic wise she¡¯d already casted three time¨Cher endurance and the broad sword were all she was going to get. She wouldn¡¯t stand a chance in a direct fight. The skiterrer finally got it¡¯s bearings, searching now that it understood the tablet wasn¡¯t actually a juicy meal. Frankie though? Fleshy and magic, delicious. It turned to face her just as the stick walker finished shaking the dead believer off its leg. Frankie had been taking steady steps backwards, but the time for subtlety was over. She dropped her backpack and ran into the trees. They¡¯d barely slow the creatures down, but Frankie needed every advantage. She ducked and weaved. If she made it three more minutes she¡¯d probably have reinforcements. A crash behind her told her that the skitterer had reached the treeline. She made good tempo, the blessings from earlier still carrying her feet. She kept one eye behind her for the right time to use the nightstick. Two more crashes and Frankie sensed proximity. A quick swing back, aiming for a weak point in the leg. A soft squish confirmed she¡¯d been close. No time to pause, another stride over the fallen log, another dash around the next tree. She ducked through some dense bushes and cut a sharp right. The heavier skitterer slid past her. She sliced at it, drawing more black ooze out of a second cut in its leg. Not enough to stop it, but maybe a weak spot. She reached out her other sense. Good news: two sisters 250 feet out, among them Samie, though at this point it was probably Kevin. Bad news: the stick walker was using the path cleared by the skitterer, and was just a few strides behind her. Worse news: the skitterer had cut off her path towards denser brush. Frankie skirted as close as she dared. It snapped its oversized jaw at her and she hit it with the nightstick. It jerked away, but no visible damage. If she could get it far enough from the stick walker she could try to fight it. Up and to the right there was particularly large oak tree. The skitterer would have room to maneuver in the clear ground below it, but it also wouldn¡¯t clear the path in doing so, and the stick walker¡¯s crappy leverage might struggle in the branches. It was worth a shot. She made the desperate sprint and reached the trunk. It would make at least a useful obstacle. The skitterer flew at her, and she sidestepped while swinging the stick. Only a glancing blow, and it had avoided the oak tree. Frankie faked a leap across the front of the tree, and this time the skitterer overcommitted. It struck the oak tree with a thump, and Frankie connected a clean hit on its front right leg. Already weakened, the hallowed sword broke through. With five working legs it would limp only a little, but if Frankie took out the. middle leg as well she could effectively disable it. She gambled a swing at its middle leg while it was still stunned, but that was a mistake. It recovered too quickly, and pain flared through her left shoulder as the skitterer¡¯s jaw cut into her muscle. The pendant around her neck disintegrated, and her entire body flared blue, explosive flames. The skitterer¡¯s jaw couldn¡¯t hold against the force of the blast, and it slid an arm¡¯s length backwards. The leaves around her caught fire, and Frankie danced back herself escape the circle of flames. She took the moment to check on the stick walker. The oak¡¯s outer crown had slowed it, but it was within the canopy now. It stood on the other side of the trunk, only two, maybe three strides away. Even slowed by the branches that wouldn¡¯t be long. Her shoulder throbbed. The skiterrer had torn muscle, even more when it¡¯s jaw got brutally ripped off. She wouldn¡¯t be able to keep wielding the night stick, and she was hemoraging blood. She took the momentary space the pendant had given her and started to run again. Her pace was slowing. The blessinsg from earlier were wearing off, and she was losing too much blood on her shoulder. Without the blessing she wasn¡¯t going to be fast enough to dodge, lucky enough to hit a weak point, or lethal enough to do damage. Without the blood wasn¡¯t going to stay conscious. She tried to scramble. More blood streaming out of her shoulder. Only a few more seconds and her backup would be here, at least one of them among the coven¡¯s heaviest combat hitters. But staying awake was getting harder. Just a little more¡­ The stick walker¡¯s leg came up just short, and Frankie tripped as she dodged. She barely felt the ground when she hit it. Her vision was growing hazy, but then she felt the calming blue glow of prox i mi ty. A backward¡¯s ba s eball cap, an inh u m a n smil e. Kevin was he r e. She c ou l d let herself f a d e out¡­ He¡¯d take care of t h e¡­ IX. Being Pledges
[Week 2.2ish] The poster at the entrance of the cafeteria warned that there¡¯d been an explosion on campus, in one of the glades. A bunch of trees had been flattened, and a small fire had burned down some more. Someone had been stabbed nearby as well. Police were trying to figure out if the actions were committed by the same perpetrator. Claire shook her head. Campus was less safe every day. It¡¯d been less than a week and a half since she got her bid letter, but it felt like an eternity. She¡¯d been ready for hazing¨Csocial status needed to be earned¨Cbut this was something else. Still, she refused to let it beat her down. And ground zero of her resistance was the cafeteria¡¯s dessert section. She took a confident stroll, past mediocre rice crispy treats, stale apple pies, and over to the brownies. They were better than they had any right to be, and they¡¯d only gotten better since Miriam had banned them. She grabbed one, then got herself her daily hot chocolate and strutted back to the group¡¯s lunch table. Riga had tried to say something last week, but Claire had given her a well deserved death glare. Since then she¡¯d largely been left alone. Even Arie hadn¡¯t talked about it with her, though the smug look she got from them every time she sat down with her dessert said enough: Arie found the defiance amusing. That felt somehow humiliating in its own way. Somehow from them Claire didn¡¯t mind it as much. She sat down in the open seat next to Arie, who glanced at her tray, eyed the desert, and gave her exactly the amused look Claire had expected. It was comforting and confusing. Claire took a sip of her glorious hot chocolate. ¡°How¡¯s your week?¡± ¡°We got our second problem set for Econ 101,¡± Arie said over their salad, ¡°it¡¯s long. A lot of people are freaked out about it.¡± ¡°Are you?¡± Claire asked. The small smile she got back radiated Arie¡¯s brand of confident near-arrogance. ¡°We had worse things at my high school.¡± Claire felt the warm glow of her own smile. Arie¡¯s easy confidence never failed to to make her feel fuzzy. The rest of the group began to assemble around the table. Luna and Becca arrived first. Then Diana sat down and Claire felt herself freeze up a little. She liked Persephone, Luna, and Becca just fine. Persephone was cool, Luna really needed to work on her insecurity, and Becca was a bit timid, but they were all nice people and getting to know them for the last week had been fun. But her feelings towards the future minders were decidedly more cautious. They were threats, even when they¡¯d largely left her alone. Diana in particular felt a dangerous kind of perceptive. Still, she did her best to be polite, especially since the group as a whole was getting along really nicely. ¡°May we sit, miss?¡± Luna¡¯s question sparked a moment of annoyance in Claire. As much as she liked the girl personally Luna¡¯s way of just rolling over was kind of aggravating. She was being such a doormat. She¡¯d improved her makeup too¨Cbegrudgingly Claire had to admit that she seemed to be blooming under the way they were treated. ¡°You may, Luna,¡± Diana responded. She pulled out a chair for her, then gave her a quick brush of the shoulder. Claire felt a pang of jealousy at how easy that interaction had been, how confident and safe Luna seemed. She forced the emotion back into its box. She turned back to Arie instead. ¡°There were a lot of people freaking out in my psych class as well. Lots of people not ready for having college length assignments.¡± Arie nodded. ¡°I¡¯m actually kind of glad for our study hour? It¡¯s nice to hang out and work through problems.¡± Claire just nodded and went back to her food. She found the study hours generally tense¨Csomeone might demand something of her at any time¨Cthough Aria¡¯s presence generally made the experience bearable. Persephone interrupted their conversation. ¡°Have any of you seen the big sisters this morning? They seem absolutely exhausted.¡± ¡°It¡¯s been that way for the past few days has it not?¡± Riga asked. ¡°It¡¯s been way worse since the explosion,¡± Becca said. ¡°Do you think the frats and sororities were affected?¡± Everyone paused for a moment to reflect on that. It¡¯s not like the rest of their time at Delta Sigma hadn¡¯t been weird. Luna finally spoke up. ¡°That doesn¡¯t reallymake sense, it happened pretty far from frat row.¡± ¡°Claire, weren¡¯t you and Diana over there for class?¡± Persephone asked. Claire hadn¡¯t thought about that before. She felt a shudder go through her. ¡°Actually yeah, and Luna was doing office hours in the same building. Really a close call.¡± ¡°Wow, scary,¡± Becca murmured. There was a bit of silence after that, as everyone ate lunch and digested things heavier than their food. Eventually Luna made a very visible effort to find something to say. After a opening and closing her mouth a few times, she turned to Riga. ¡°What have you all been learning in your etiquette classes?¡± ¡°Mmmm, the etiquette classes have been mostly alright,¡± Riga answered, ¡°posture, presence, those categories of thing. We actually spend a good amount of the time learning about you. What you are supposed to know. Allyson demonstrates and then we must catch what she¡¯s doing wrong.¡± ¡°Yes, we actually spend a lot of time talking about you all.¡± Arie confirmed with a grin. It dripped with promise. ¡°We have this lil group session as well, and it¡¯s basically all about talking about your brains, how to read you, how to understand what you¡¯re doing and why, all those lovely little things.¡± Claire felt that old frustration boiling up inside her, that relentless drive to push and push back and overcome and¨CArie¡¯s hand was on her arm. Arie was safe. Claire relaxed a little. Persephone seemed almost as indignant, though not nearly as on edge. There was something cute about the way she turned up her nose and huffed. ¡°Oh yeah, what did you learn about me?¡± Arie smile turned a little cruel as she answered. ¡°You¡¯re insecure about fitting in places, and it makes you seek attention. You¡¯ve been different all of your life and¡ª¡± ¡°¨Cand that¡¯s why,¡± Diana cut her off, ¡°you need to be shown acceptance.¡± She gave Arie a glare. Arie just shrugged and smiled. Becca looked a little uncomfortable for a moment, but seemed to settle when Diana started stroking her shoulder. There was another long moment of awkwardness before Luna broke the silence again. She spoke to Riga, ¡°would you like me to get you ice cream, miss?¡± Riga nodded. The future servant looked around the table. ¡°Anyone else?¡± But Arie and Diana both declined. Diana watched her go. ¡°Seriously, we¡¯re supposed to learn how to understand you, and to grow into our responsibility ¡®minding¡¯ you, not that I¡¯m exactly sure what that means outside of having you grab ice cream.¡± It didn¡¯t take long for Luna to get back. ¡°Here you go, miss.¡± ¡°Thank you Luna,¡± Riga said, ¡±come sit down.¡± The servant seemed to preen a little as she sat down, and conversation resumed. Amidst the din something nagging at Claire¡¯s brain finally connected. ¡°Hey, has anyone else noticed they haven¡¯t made us pay dues? Riga seemed interested in that line of thought. ¡°Have you tried to figure out why or how?¡± This novel is published on a different platform. Support the original author by finding the official source. Before anyone could really engage with the question, Diana¡¯s watch beeped. They needed to head out. Most of the white cuffs would head to lectures, but Persephone, Claire, Becca, and Luna happened to all be available until later in the afternoon, which meant that Tuesday had been dubbed ¡°early ballet.¡± They walked back across campus and naturally ended up in two little groups. Persephone gently directed Claire away from the rest. When she spoke her voice was hesitant. ¡°Do you think Arie hates me?¡± All the stress and difficulty suddenly disappeared, and Claire felt warmth and care bloom in her chest. ¡°Noooooo.¡± She gave Perse a hug, whispered the rest in her ear. ¡°Arie¡¯s just a little prickly sometimes.¡± ¡°Are you sure?¡± The skater girl suddenly seemed so small. ¡°Yes, under the spikes bits she cares.¡± She released the hug and patted her on the back. ¡°You should just ask her. She likes direct conversations.¡± They rejoined the rest of the group. Luna and Becca had been whispering about something, probably about stuffed animals or something. When they quieted down Persephone spoke up. ¡°What do you think we¡¯ll learn today?¡± ¡°Not sure,¡± Luna said, ¡°I think we¡¯re pretty good at kneeling at this point?¡± Becca nodded and left it at that. Claire shook her head in renewed frustration. ¡°I¡¯m getting kind of tired of drilling from ready-kneel to presenting-kneel back to ready kneel over and over again. We look fine. Persephone you come at this like a god damn dancer, and Becca you¡¯d look fine no matter what you did.¡± ¡°I hope we learn how to walk,¡± Persephone said, ¡°They always look so graceful even when they¡¯re just walking places.¡± Claire looked left, and realized that Luna looked sad all of a sudden. Claire spun for a moment trying to figure out what had happened. Had it been something she said? The way they were treated angered her, but Luna had a kind of earnestness about her that she didn¡¯t want to hurt. Persephone noticed too. ¡°Luna, what¡¯s going through your head?¡± She leaned forward to better inspect Luna¡¯s face. Luna just looked away. ¡°It¡¯s dumb.¡± ¡°It¡¯s the trans thing,¡± Becca whispered. Claire and Persephone both gave her a dumbfounded look, but Claire pieced it together faster. ¡°It¡¯s because I mentioned the other two, isn¡¯t it?¡± she asked. Luna looked embarrassed, but nodded. ¡°You know, I was thinking at lunch how amazed I am that you can dive into this so easily,¡± Claire said, ¡°and you look amazing when we do Ballet as well.¡± ¡°Thanks...¡± Luna whispered. Persephone leaned against her in support, which caused Luna to tense up again, but then things settled down until they got back to the house on Northside. ¡ª¡ª Today Claire floated through ballet class like she was in a trance. Didn¡¯t let it touch her, didn¡¯t let it affect her insides. Didn¡¯t let the tension of everything get to her. She was moving from position to position, but she could tell Miriam was gradually getting more frustrated with her. Eventually the taps became slashes, and Claire couldn¡¯t ignore the pain anymore. It pulled her back to the present, and with that, to the frustration at being stuck in this situation. She opened her mouth to speak, but Miriam spoke first. ¡°I want you here, with us, or you¡¯re never going to learn to do it smoothly.¡± ¡°I¨C¡° Claire began. ¡°Look at yourself in the mirror.¡± Miriam pointed to the front of the room, at their mirror image. ¡°Now go from standing to a kneel.¡± Claire did the requested motion. ¡°See how boring that is?¡± Miriam asked. ¡°That¡¯s because your heart isn¡¯t in it.¡± Claire stared at the mirror, then at Miriam. It¡­ yes she could see it too. Fuck. She¡¯d been stupid. She thought she found a way she could do this, could keep enough of herself while still doing what she needed to do. And now she was fucking it up. ¡°Want to try again?¡± the minder asked. Clare nodded. She did want to be good at this. And Miriam was being unexpectedly nice about this. She took a deep breath, let the tension flow out of her, returned to her body. Let herself open up. She shivered, the tension was back. Miriam brushed her neck, and she leaned into it gratefully. She was pretty sure she¡¯d whimpered. Nothing to do but try again. Claire rose to standing, then tried to kneel. It looked maybe a little better? Miriam gave her a pat on the head. ¡°Good girl for trying, but you¡¯re heart¡¯s not in it right now. We¡¯ll talk about it more later.¡± Miriam let off a little then, though Claire also found herself trying to be more present, trying to push a little more, trying to at least not embarrass herself and get lectured again. It was a little depressing. That also made the rest of the hour pass quickly, and she followed Miriam back to her office. The last time they¡¯d done this, Miriam and Claire had sat across from each other as they went over Claire¡¯s schedule for the week. This time, Miriam stopped her at the door. She pointed at the couch. ¡°I want you to kneel there.¡± Claire immediately clammed up. This wasn¡¯t the feelingless movement practice of ballet, where she could just go along. This was something real. Whatever made this so easy for everyone else, she still didn¡¯t have it, she needed to be colder, she needed to¨C She remembered that brush against her neck, and found the headspace from ballet class again. She walked over to the designated spot as gracefully as she could, then slid into a ready kneel facing sideways to the couch. Miriam walked over after her and relaxed on the couch an arm¡¯s length away. Her body was in the right place, doing the right things, and she was watching it. ¡°Alright,¡± Miriam continued, ¡°that was actually pretty good. Now I want you to try to go deeper into yourself, and to be present in your body. Tell me what you feel.¡± Claire tried to feel her body. It was just her body, right? It just existed. There wasn¡¯t really anything there. Except that she was tense. ¡°You notice it, right?¡± Miriam was solemn above her. ¡°The tension? You¡¯re scared.¡± Claire just nodded, of course she was tense. She was vulnerable. Not-safe. Miriam wanted her to give up power over herself. ¡°I¡¯m sure you think this is because you¡¯re kneeling.¡± Miriam crossed her legs, still a little distance away. ¡°But you¡¯ve actually been like this since I met you. You were like this at the rush week event too.¡± Claire looked up in surprise. ¡°Why¨C Why? And why take me then?¡± ¡°Because we think we know what¡¯s underneath.¡± Claire wasn¡¯t sure how to respond to that, so she tried being in her body some more. Miriam leaned forward. ¡°Claire. Do you believe I care about you?¡± Claire stammered a moment at that. It was weird to consider, but¨C ¡°yes.¡± ¡°Do you believe that I know what I¡¯m doing?¡± Claire almost wilted under Miriam¡¯s gaze. The pledgemaster¡¯s energy was usually all over the place. Here, now? It was focused, centered, and it made Claire realize just how much force, how much will, hid behind the other big sister¡¯s chaotic, often mercurial mask. But she needed to answer. ¡°Y-yes¡­ ¡°¡­miss.¡± Claire wasn¡¯t sure why the honorific slipped out, but it earned her a smile. From Miriam. But not a reprieve from the questions. ¡°Do you trust me?¡± Claire nodded quickly. ¡°Yes miss.¡± Miriam shook her head, disappointed. ¡°No you don¡¯t. Not really. Tell me why don¡¯t you trust me?¡± Claire felt the adrenaline course through her. ¡°I¡ª I don¡¯t know.¡± ¡°Dig. Keep trying. This is important.¡± Miriam¡¯s gaze pinnet her to the ground. It was static, unmoving, and Claire couldn¡¯t remember the last time the minder had blinked. ¡°Listen to your lizard brain, this isn¡¯t something you can intellect your way through.¡± ¡°You¡­¡± Claire clenched her eyes shut, tried to connect with herself. ¡°You want to control me. You hurt me. You want to have power over me.¡± Miriam took the answer with perfect equanimity. As if Claire had just informed her of the weather. But she leaned back ever so slightly, and the gaze let up a little. ¡°And yet you¡¯re jealous when you see Luna let go so easily, when you see Becca curl into Diana¡¯s control. When Persephone gets put in her place, and accepts it.¡± Claire wanted to deny that, but couldn¡¯t. She looked away. ¡°Do you think Persephone and Becca are safe?¡± ¡°I¡¯m not sure¡­ maybe? Miss.¡± Her eyes were drawn to Miriam again, to the iron certainty found there. The minder¡¯s face became so gentle, so infinitely caring as she spoke, ¡°when you¡¯re jealous of them, is it because they¡¯re not safe?¡± Claire gave her the shakiest of smiles. ¡°No miss,¡± she whispered. Something inside of her felt suddenly vulnerable. Miriam spoke slowly, ¡°it¡¯s because they can open up and be vulnerable, without some important part of them screaming.¡± Claire just nodded, eyes a little blurry. ¡°And that contradiction, between desire and danger, between jealousy and judgement, is why you¡¯re so all over the place.¡± Miriam placed a gentle hand on her shoulder. ¡°I want you to try and open yourself up for me. Just a little bit. Just for five minutes, or maybe even the rest of this session. Let yourself relax here. Trust that I¡¯m going to be gentle, and take care of you.¡± The hand squeezed a little, just the into of a shoulder message. Claire tried. She honestly did, she tried to pull herself here, to find that place inside herself that Jacqueline seemed to have found, and open up. Tried to find it through the wobbling, the blurry eyes, the bubbling uncertainty. ¡°Claire, you¡¯re shaking,¡± Miriam whispered. Claire looked down at her hands. Turned them back and forth, almost puzzled by what she was seeing. They couldn¡¯t have held a glass of water, as they were now. ¡°¡®It¡¯s not safe,¡± she whispered again. Miriam¡¯s hand touched her head, as if about to pet it, before quickly pulling away. Her words were quiet and sympathetic. ¡°I know, I know¡­¡± Miriam¡¯s tone picked up a bit more force. ¡°Clair. You believe I care about you.¡± She felt more certainty than the first time she answered. ¡°Yes. Miss.¡± ¡°You believe I know what I¡¯m doing.¡± She actually managed to crack a smile at that. ¡°Scarily so, miss. ¡° ¡°Then can you trust me to help you? To move a bit closer and touch you a bit more?¡± Claire just nodded, but Miriam wouldn¡¯t take that. ¡°I want to hear you properly.¡± She found her voice. ¡°Yes miss.¡± Claire watched as Miriam slowly got up and sat back down right above Claire. Then she took a single leg, moved it behind Claire¡¯s shoulders and used it to both support Claire¡¯s back and hold Claire¡¯s body sideways against the couch. The other leg went across Claire¡¯s front, lying loosely over her lap. Hands began playing with her hair. Claire felt frozen in the sudden closeness. She felt frayed. The emotional weight of Miriam¡¯s questions, of kneeling, of letting herself be touched. But it was also¡­ nice. The hands in her hair were soothing in some primal way. Miriam was right, she was always tense. And while some part of her screamed about vulnerability, some other part of her drank in the closeness, the feelings of safety. And as the screaming grew too much, too exhausting, she just¡­ gave in. She realized she was weeping, and that same sudden neediness she¡¯d felt during her talk with Jacqueline and Kacie last week came back. She pushed into the legs, into the hands, into the safety of restriction. She needed more. Miriam suddenly spoke up above her¨C¡°You may break your position, and do as you like with your hands.¡±¨Cand so Claire slumped over and clung to Miriam¡¯s calf like it was her only anchor to the world. ¡°There we go,¡± Miriam whispered, ¡°there we go.¡± She was lost about how Miriam did it, but somehow Claire existed in a world surrounded entirely by her minder. Her limbs, her voice, her control. And somehow she felt safe. They stayed there for the rest of the hour, and somehow the jumpiness, the anxiety, the need to do something. It never came. She eventually was given permission to shift off her knees, but even then they stayed there. Just Miriam, just safety, just touch, and what Claire was beginning to understand as the peace of submission.