《The Dark Beast's Love》


 Chapter 1: The Monster that hunts at Night

    The first time it happened, no one could believe what was right in front of them. There was too much blood for the eyes toprehend, and too little body left for anyone to recognise the victim. It was only due to the cry of her husband that Mrs Morrigan Evermore was identified as the torn-apart body on her floor, with barely anything left on her face except for blood and the skull that was covered underneath it. I barely got a glimpse of the scene from where I stood, the cold boulders from the stonewall numbing the feeling of my feet and the fog from my breath almost crystallising in front of my face in the winter cold, but even from that distance, the picture the sight painted in my head was enough to leave me with nightmares for weeks. No one found a trace of whoever or whatever had created such a mess, but it was all anyone could talk about for days.


    The second time it happened, people spent hours of their night trying to find a connection between Mrs Evermore and the new victim, Mr Heimdenger. The murders had been about a month apart, but the corpses were too simr for one to mistake it as two different murderers, both torn apart into nothingness. There were whispers about a beast because too many found the scene to be too inhuman to be the creation of something that wasn''t a bloodthirsty beast. The most noticeable change however was the way people started rebuilding their homes. Despite not having enough money, despite not having food on the tables or even enough clothes to survive the winter, people started creating walls around their houses, most of wood, some of stone and the most unfortunate just pulled whatever they could find to replicate a wall between the outer world and their homes. My own father cut down ourst tree to strengthen the wall of our home to at least get the illusion of security.


    The third time it happened, people started whispering about a curse. The witches of the vige had spoken and told everyone about how someone had opened a door they weren''t supposed to open, and now they were all punished as the dark magic gued their grounds. They foretold how crops would grow and people would starve only to be picked off one by one by the monster that hunts in the night until there was nothing left but blood on the streets. After that day, people made up ns to leave these cursed grounds, flee the starvation and seek new ces to live. By the end of the month, two families had left, and their homes had been pulled apart to pieces by those who wanted the material to secure their homes even further.


    The next month, the two families were back, all bodies covered in blood and wounds and some even with their heads even torn apart. People all around were sobbing and wailing as they realised that they weren''t going to be able to leave this town ever. These bodies were the first ones I had gotten a closer look upon, and I felt my whole stomach turn as the eyes of one of the daughters started back at me, her expression somehow echoing the desperation she must have felt when whatever it was attacked her.


    From that day onwards, the vige broke out in hysteria. No one wanted to take their chances when it came to the witches'' words, so people started stashing all the food they could get their hands on, and the already obvious rift between the poor and the wealthy became even greater. My father''s corpses were raided, but by then he had already hidden most of the food he had managed to grow during previous seasons.


    Some months after that, a pattern was clear. The curse hit once a month, and it always urred when the moon was at its fullest. It never took more than one person, unless someone tried to leave or approach the beast itself, in that case, no one had survived long enough to see the next sunrise. Some, however, imed to have spotted the beast. The descriptions of it were vague, if even true. Some imed that it wasrge with ws and fangs the size of pine cones. Others imed that it had wings and a tail so sharp that they could feel the cut from where they were peeking. Some even said that it wasn''t even a solid thing, but more like a dark mist floating around in search for its next victim. But no matter what description was true, one thing was for sure, it was horrifying and we were nothing against its strength.


    However, the dull eyes of the daughter still haunted me, and it got to the point where the thoughts of just waiting on my death and ending up just like her led to panic attacks alone in the night. When the sun rose again, I was determined not to leave this world without a fight even if it was a losing one. We did not have much where I lived, but my father had a set of knives from his ancestors, and my brother had an old archery set he wouldn''t miss thanks to the fancy year the upper ss provided their trained soldiers. It was not much, but the first time I released the arrow, missing the target by several feet, the need for control washed over me, and I was determined to do it again and again until I had perfected every shot.


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    Small minutes of firing arrows became full hours of target practice, and full hours of target practice became hunts for something more than just grains on the table. The most difficult part of this however wasn''t the endless frustration every time I messed up, nor was it the dangers in the woods I found to be the best hunting grounds, it ended up being having to lie to my family about where the meat came from. Despite being on the poorer side of the poption, manners from the upper ss were still demanded. Ady was not to hunt or wield any type of weapon, she was to remain fair for future bachelors who wished to marry her and have her carrying his children. If any in her family found out that she was hunting during the days they would strip her of her weapon and punish her generously for misbehaving. Instead, her family was led to believe that she got the meat from a butcher on the south side of the vige, in payment for her services as a maid in his house since the wife couldn''t care for it herself.


    I should have known the lie wouldn''tst, my mother always had her ways to reveal even the most guarded secrets.


    I hade home from a hunt to see my mother and a man twice my age standing in our home, causing the living room to seem even smaller than it was. I should have suspected atrocity when my mother started speaking with her honey- sweet voice, introducing the stranger to me and serving us both tea as she led one conversation after another. I had just yed along with whatever scheme she''d nned, answering the stranger''s curious questions and doing my best to replicate the perfect daughter that my mother had trained me to be, aware that messing up whatever my mother had nned would result in unnecessary negativity. It wasn''t until he''d left, however, that she revealed her true intentions. My mother spoke of an engagement, spoke of a n where everything was settled except for the ring on a finger, and it had taken me a moment before realising what she was trying to do.Text content ? N?velDrama.Org.


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    As expected, the conversation turned into an argument when I refused, and my mother revealed everything she knew, including the secret hunts I''d been sneaking off to. She told me that this was my only chance in life, that she had to wed me before it got out that her daughter was a hunting savage, and I had cursed at her, swearing that she would no longer be my mother if she forced me through the engagement, and then just left to spend my night in the barns, as far away from her as I could.


    The same night, the monster broke into our house and killed my mother.


    The next morning, as I watched my father cradle my mother''s corpse, the echo of myst words to her ringing in my ear, I swore to be the one to kill the monster in the end.

 Chapter 2: The Cottage in the Woods

    As I rounded the big oak tree, one hand grabbed my wrist while another grabbed over my mouth, preventing me from making any sound whether it was from surprise or annoyance. However, I felt my breath hitch when the hand from my wrist snaked around my waist and the feeling of cold lips pressed against my corbone. It sent a shiver down my spine, the warmth against the cold spring air, but I wouldn''t trade it for anything in the world. "You found me," His lips brushed over my ears as he spoke.


    I turned around to face the icy blue eyes I was so familiar with, his expression mischievous but soft, always soft.


    "You shouldn''t sneak up on me," I said without heat. "One day I''ll identally mistake you for a predator and stab you."


    He chuckled and then pecked a kiss on my forehead. "No, you won''t," He gave me another peak on the lips. "You knew that I was here. You always know."


    Now my gaze softened. He was right of course, I had known that he was close. I always knew how to find him, a perk after spending so many hours in the woods using him to improve my tracking skills. He would get a few minutes headstart in order to disappear in the woods, and then I would hunt, using whatever I could see as a clue to where he could have gone. It got easier after a while, I''d learned his pattern, learned his way of thinking, learned what to look for, and now, I always know when to expect him and his wonderful eyes.


    I threw my arms around his neck and pulled him into a soaring kiss, letting everything around us dulled into nothing, everything except for the heated feeling of his lips against mine. His hand found my jaw and rested gently there as the other went into my hair, pulling my head back lightly so that he could deepen the kiss even further. We both let it go on for a bit, until we were both out of breath and only our survival instincts pulled us apart. But we remained in the same position, hand against jaw, another one in the hair and forehead resting on each other.


    "The cottage?" Nathan asked even if he knew my answer.


    He took my hand and led me down a familiar path until a cottage appeared in our sight. Despite my many hours in the woods, it had taken me months before I stumbled upon the cottage, and one can imagine my surprise when I saw a boy lurking around doing almost nothing of use. I had hated Nathan at first, not only because he was invading the one ce where I could be myself but also because he reeked of wealth. I had tried to ignore his existence, tried to leave him and his cottage behind, but he was too delighted to meet another person to get the hint. He''d tried to converse with me as he followed me, told me about his home where chandeliers lit up the mansion and of the many maids that filled the house simply to satisfy the masters. At first, I thought he was simply bragging, showing off his fancy life with the knowledge that the poor girl would never have anything close to it but then he told me of how that life dulled him, and how he missed the feeling of freedom away from his father''s watching eyes, and it was like seeing a part of myself in the story he told.


    From that day and onwards, no matter how many times I tried to stay away from the cottage, I kept returning. And he was just as happy to see me every time. I had told myself that a friend wouldn''t hurt, that apanion to help me collect the berries or manage the traps would be useful in many aspects. It wasn''t until he kissed me one summer day that I realised that I didn''t want to be just his friend, and Nathan had felt the same way.


    Now, months after that first kiss, the cottage was like our home, where the people we kept hidden from society were allowed to roam free. It had originally been Nathan''s, he had stumbled upon it one day after escaping from his father''s mansion and been determined to repair it until it was stable enough to be liveable. Calling it a cottage, however, was an exaggeration, it was more of a barn with a loft where Nathan had stocked nkets and pillows as a sleeping ce while leaving the ground floor wide open and empty from any objects, but we had gotten used to calling it a cottage after months of misidentifying it and now the name was impossible to change.


    "I got us food," Nathan said as he opened the door with a key identical to the one I wore around my neck. "Not much, but enough for you to keep your energy up."


    I squeezed his hand to show my gratitude before letting him climb thedder, me just some steps behind. As my eyesnded on the small bag in the middle of the floor, my senses were hit by the wonderful smell of bread and something unfamiliar but just as lovely. My stomach growled before I''d even gotten close to the bag and Nathan threw me a knowing look as he handed me the bag of food before dragging me to hisp so that we could both sitfortably. "I wish I could do more for you," Nathan said as I took the first bite of the somehow still lukewarm bread, an involuntary groan escaping my lips as the taste filled my mouth.


    "This is more than enough," I leaned back into him. "This is more than I could''ve asked for."


    "It shouldn''t be," He hugged me around my waist, the grip tight. "This should be the least you have the right to."


    "Nathan," I put down the bread and repositioned myself so that I could get his face in my hands. "We have been over this. We live differently. We knew that from the start, but here, it''s just you and me, no one and nothing else." Nathan sighed, not in agreement but not in protest either. "One day, Liliana, you will be the death of me." He said it so carefully that my heart ached to soothe him. "I''ll turn this world upside down to make sure that every diamond belongs to you and you alone."


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    "I don''t want any diamond," My voice was barely over a whisper. "Just us to be okay."


    This time he initiated the kiss, and it was slow and longing, just like the conversation before this. It was like a dream separating this moment from every other and I leaned forward just to force him down against the covers we used as a mattress on the cold wooden floor. I could feel the smirk on his lips as his head hit the ground and how his hands started travelling lower. I was just about to kiss his jaw when my stomach grumbled, and his hands stilled. "No," I said in protest when I realised what he was about to do.


    "Sorry love, but who would I be to let you get any hungrier than you already are," He sat up despite my protests and turned me around so that I sat on hisp again, the bread and the rest of the food still in its ce.


    "You are horrible," I muttered as I took the bread again.


    "You''ll get what you want," He assured. "Just not today."Belongs to (N)?vel/Drama.Org.


    I sighed but said nothing more.


    "Be good and I see no reason for us to not pick this up tomorrow night," He unexpectedly purred in my ear and the drop in his voice sent a shiver down my spine. I almost asked him why not tonight, when I remembered that it was a full moon tonight, and the entire vige expected an unwanted visitor tonight, not sure which house would fall victim this month.


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    "I hope I''ll catch a better glimpse of it tonight," I said as nonchntly as I could. "I just need to know what it is in order to know where it can possibly hide."


    Nathan stiffened under me. "If it is a curse, it doesn''t need a ce to hide."


    "But if it''s a beast, one only needs to figure out its habits in order to understand its path," I exined. "Perhaps if I can catch it off guard I can finally kill it."


    "I know what this means to you," I could hear it in his voice that there was moreing to this. "But you can''t let that be the death of you. You can''t do anything stupid only because you think it''ll get you closer." "Nathan..." We have had this conversation before.


    "I''m not saying that you should stop training to defend yourself," He insisted. "I''m just saying that you can''t run towards something you have no idea what it is."


    "That''s why I''m trying to get a better glimpse of it," I argued. "I know better than to just run towards a sword with my eyes closed. But I still need to try to see it for myself. Right now I''m working with an impossible creature with wings, a tail, horns, fangs, ws and that supposedly is made out of mist or perhaps solid iron or maybe Mrs Beverlyn''s theory which was that it was a creature made of only hair. Nathan, I need to see it for myself to paint my own picture, at least as much as I can."


    Nathan sighed, but rested his chin on my shoulder in surrender. "Okay, but just promise toe back to me tomorrow?"


    He made me promise this every month.


    "You said it yourself, I''ll always find you."

 Chapter 3: Golden Eyes

    I sat on the couch like I always did during the full moon nights, closest to the door. My father gave me a concerned look as he walked past me, but we were way past him trying to convince me to let my mother''s death go, way past him telling me to hide instead of hunt like every other normal person would do. My brother only rolled his eyes at the sight of me.


    "You know that if it actually decides to storm in here, you sleeping on the couch will make no difference," My brother Varius pointed out. "You''re just encouraging your own death."


    I red at him with as much heat as I possibly could. "Perhaps if you would lend me your fancy gear it could make a difference."


    Varius only scoffed. ¡°As if I would even hand over the weapons to someone as fragile as you."


    And he left it with that, my blood boiling in my veins as I considered shouting out an insult towards him and his fragile masculinity, but in the end, the satisfaction wouldn''t be worth the lecture from my father.


    So I waited, eyes closed but ears focused on every noticeable sound around me. It wasn''t until I felt the temperature drop around that I finally started moving towards the closest window, curious eyes scanning the houses nearby to see if there was anything nearby. As expected, the vige was dead in the night, as it always was, the only warning we got before the massacre was the temperature change, nothing more, nothing less.


    Once the coast was clear, I sneaked out the door, the echo of my promise to Nathan a reminder in my ear, but I assured myself that all I needed to do today was to see. I went in the direction my body begged me not to go, the icing feeling more of a warning than anything else but my determination was set in stone. I walked slowly and quietly, another trained skill of mine that I taught myself while roaming sound in the woods. The feeling of the handle of my dagger worked as a stabiliser against my palm and I found myself gripping hard on the bow I had slung over my shoulder when mist started forming in front of my lips.


    I followed the cold to the outer parts of town, where the homes were barely houses and the inhabitants few after a harsh winter. By now, I was suspecting to at least see some traces of the beast''s presence, but there was nothing, nothing but the cold and the full moon above me. I heard some whimpers from one of the poorly built houses, but since their istion was next to nothing, I could distinguish it as a human sound and nothing more, so I kept moving, using the shadows to blend into the surroundings with the hopes that nothing would catch me off guard. However, when I realised that the houses wereing to an end, and in order to continue towards the increasing cold I would have to leave myself vulnerable in the open, I hesitated. The memory of Nathan voicing his concern reyed in my mind, and I knew that despite my curiosity I was going to turn back and wait for the next full moon before I got the chance to do it again.


    I was about to retreat when I heard a snap from not too far away, and a growl that was too low to be mistaken as something a human could have done. The blood froze in my veins as I realised what was happening, and more importantly, what was close. I took some deep breaths in order to calm my pounding heart when I suddenly heard nothing. Realisation dawned upon me like a thousand raining arrows.


    During one of my many hunts, I once found myself close to a Lynx, another predator of the woods that caused enough damage to keep the citizens of the vige away, despite the overflowing life that the woods provided. It had not yet noticed me, so I was carefully retracing my steps with the hopes that it would remain that way. However, suddenly it stilled, not moving a single muscle, barely even breathing from where I saw it. I remained still with the hopes that whatever had caught its attention would direct the danger away from me, my prayers were dismissed as the Lynx charged right at me.Belongs to (N)?vel/Drama.Org.


    This time I ran before it got the chance to charge. My instincts bought me some mere seconds, but those seconds saved my life, at least for now. As I ran through the houses, grateful over the escape path I had mapped out in my head, another decision that gave me some precious minutes as I heard the beast crash everything in its way in order to get me. This was when the screaming began, but I wasn''t sure whether it was from someone getting torn apart or seeing the beast as it continued its hunt. What frightened me the most, except the fact that I was about to die, was the fact that it hadn''t caught up to me yet despite it being described as faster than anything.


    I ran towards the woods, determined not to let my foolishness doom the rest of the vige and with the hopes that the beast would by some miracle lose me amongst the trees. I was fully aware of the fact that no matter how many traps I tried to lure it through, the beast snapped free of everyone within a blink of an eye and gave me almost no time toe up with a n.


    My luck ran out when I felt its ws grasp around my ankle and I was sent flying forwards.


    During my escape, I hadn''t dared to look back, risking losing important seconds that could lead to my survival. But now, with the beast''s face in front of me, I almost wished that I had, just so that the nightmare could have been over by now. It did not have wings and was definitely made out of something more solid than mist and shadows, but none of these realisations made it any less horrifying. Its face was something close to thebination of a wolf, a human and a lion, its fangs abnormally sharp and face too advanced for me toprehend in the middle of my panic, however, of all the sharp angles the beast was made of, its eyes were the sharpest of them all, golden, glowing and piercing me under its vicious look. When it raised its arm, the hand humanlike but withrge ws and pale fur, I prayed to every god that would listen to spare me.


    Perhaps the gods did listen, because when my eyes collided with the eyes of the wolf-like beast again, something close to hesitation washed over it and its gaze seemed to reflect something I couldn''t sort out. I took its moment of faltering to drive the dagger into its shoulder and it howled in pain as I scrambled to my feet, ignoring the pain in my ankle left behind by the beast''s digging ws. I ran again, this time towards therge boulders where I knew that there were spaces tight enough to prevent it from reaching me, unless it could tear apart stone.


    By some miracle, I reached the caves before the beast caught up to me again. I hadn''t heard iting up behind me after I ran from where it managed to grab my wrist, parts of me suspected that that was mainly because of the pounding in my ears, but when I turned around from the crack between the stones where I hid there was nothing there. But still, with my heart beating violently in my chest, I waited until sunrise.

 Chapter 4: The miracle and the unwanted

    By the time I felt safe enough to exit my hiding ce, the sun was already high in the sky. I walked as carefully as I could but ended up running thest distance once my eyes spotted the familiarity of home not too far away. Almost immediately as I reached the centre, someone grabbed my hand and I almost stabbed them with one of my arrows in response. The person flinched, but their expression was too concentrated on my face to even notice the archery set that hung on my back.


    "Miss Liliana?" I recognised her as the baker''s wife. "We''ve been looking everywhere for you!"


    Just as I was about to respond, someone else grabbed my arm and turned me around.


    "She''s here!" The tall man yelled over the crowd and dragged me to the middle, I was far too stunned to evenprehend what was happening.


    "What?" I tried to get some answers, but my words were drowned out by the crowd.


    "Liliana!" The sound of my father''s voice caught my attention and I found him pushing through the crowd.


    When he reached me, he pulled me into a tight hug, the scent of smoke and wood surrounding me and somehow weing me to safety. Behind him, I saw Varius in his proudest stance, eyes narrowing as they scanned me and lips pressed to a thin line. Still, behind that mask of anger that I sensed directed towards me, I saw his concern.


    "We were so worried," My father said as he took my face in his hands to examine me. "We couldn''t find you and the beast hadn''t left anything behind and..."


    "Wait," I interrupted him as I processed the words. "It didn''t kill anyone?"


    My father nodded and I felt an overwhelming emotion wash over me.


    Since that first night many years ago, the beast had always remained a mystery, but its pattern was clear, it appears during the full moon and always takes one. During months when more than one dies, it is usually due to people being in its way or perhaps someone trying to try their luck and leave town, but even if no resistance is provided, we always end with one corpse, and the beast always made sure that the corpse would be found the next morning. So what did it mean now that everyone''s alive?


    "We thought that it had taken you," My father replied. "We thought you were this month''s victim."


    "But I wasn''t," I replied before craning my neck to look over the crowd. "I''m safe, father. I''m alive."


    Around me, people started to murmur.


    "This is a miracle," A woman yelled over the crowd.


    "Perhaps the Gods have finally answered our prayers!" Another one said.


    Despite the murmurs around us, my father''s eyes still rested on me with a determination I hadn''t seen in him for a long time. After my mother''s brutal murder, my father lost all hope in life. He still worked with the rest of the vige''s lumberjack and earned enough money for us to keep our house and have food on the table (with the addition of my secret hunts and Varius'' sry of course), but he never longed for anything else. It had been like watching an unsettling machine at first, a creature only moving to do its duties but nothing more, and I had hated the emptiness in my father''s eyes. However, seeing an emotion after so many years of nothing was almost more unsettling than warming, and my stomach did some flips as if to anticipate that something bad was going to happen.


    "Let''s go home," Varius said when he finally approached us. "Let her rest."


    My father agreed and led me to our home, away from the people and the shouts of this month''s miracle.


    Did they know? Did they know that the beast was here tonight, that it hadid its eyes upon me and chased me into the woods? Did they know that someone was supposed to die today, but for the first time ever, another got away? I looked back at the crowd, some people had started crying, overwhelmed with hope as they wondered if this was the end to a terrible era while others shouted out warnings, saying that this could be the calm before the storm, that the beast would return the next month to ughter them all without any mercy. The thought of facing the beast again made me shiver, and it was some kind of relief seeing the familiarity of the small building we called home.


    My father ushered me to bed and it wasn''t until this point that I realised how worn out I was by the sleepless night, how my legs ached from my escape and my heart still barely had recovered after the rush of adrenaline that kept me alive.


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    The sight of my bed almost had me groaning in longing for something soft and warm, and I was unconscious moments before my head even hit the pillow, those golden eyes a mere afterthought in the back of my mind.


    *****


    When I woke up again the sun was way past midday and I realised before evenprehending anything else that I had left Nathan.


    The thought of him being alone in the woods caused me to fly out of my bed, a decision I regretted as soon as the dizziness hit me and caused me to stumble back again. My second attempt was much more sessful, and I quickly took my gear and my cloak before rushing out, walking straight into my brother in the process.


    "Someone was in a hurry," My brothermented, brow raised in a silent question.


    "I remembered that I errand to run," I lied instinctively. "Tell father that I''ll be back for supper."


    Turns out that it wasn''t necessary, because I ran into my father as I reached the door.


    "Father," I eximed, horrified. "I am so sorry."


    "Why are you running?" My father''s tone was harsh. "It is not appropriate."


    I was so taken aback by hisment that I forgot that I had a ce to be for a second. My father nevermented about my undylike behaviour, not when mother was around and certainly not after her death. It was not that he didn''t mind, all parents would have loved to have a daughter like Vi Searthe from around the corner; graceful, kind, elegant and soft in every way, but my father had never taken the energy to correct me for wanting or being more than just a wallflower, until today.


    "Father?" That was all I managed to get out as I stared at him.


    "We''ll talk about itter," My father said dismissively. "I''m d that you''re awake. We have a guest."


    It wasn''t until then that I noticed the stranger standing behind my father, a boy I recognised, but never had been able to get the name of. He was tall and brte, probably some years older than myself but his boyish figure made him look a lot younger inparison to the rest of the boys his age. He studied me from my head and down, and I got the sudden urge to wrap my cloak around me a little tighter.


    "Liliana, this is Mr Hector Waby, son of the town messenger," My father introduced and Hector gave me a courteous nod.


    "I''m d to meet you, Mr Hector," I greeted, disguising all my scepticism to pure curiosity. "For what do we have the honour?"


    "Liliana," My father said it in a way that indicated that it meant more than he was letting on, but I couldn''t figure out what exactly he was referring to until he continued. "Mr Waby is the man I have chosen for you to marry." I suddenly forgot how to breathe.


    "What?... Father?... This is outrageous!" I blurted out the word in disbelief, trying to remain on my feet as my head wouldn''t stop spinning. "I can''t marry him."


    "You can and you will," My father said, tone determined. "It''s about time that you act like thedy you were born to be, and Mr Waby is the perfect gentleman for that transition. He can offer you things I never could. He can keep you safe."


    I looked back at the wispy boy who only looked ufortable by the developing conflict. Despite his length, I was pretty sure that even I could take him down a million times over before he ever managed to even get in a decent punch on a rag doll, much less a real threat. I was afraid that I''d break him by only giving him a too-harsh re, I wasn''t going to survive a life with him.Text content ? N?velDrama.Org.


    "You can''t do this," I pleaded to my father. "I can do better, I can be better, just don''t marry me off to him or anyone else without my consent, please."


    "Your consent is irrelevant when all you do is run around town like an errand boy," I was taken back by my father''s response. "You shall marry him, and the wedding shall take ce one month and two weeks from this day, and that is my final decision."


    The wood creaked under my feet and before I''d even realised what my body was doing, I was out the door and into the woods.

 Chapter 5: Where no one can find us

    When I finally reached the cottage I fumbled with the key around my neck, almost screaming out in frustration when I realised that my hands were shaking and the key refused to fit in. I''ve never been so desperate for someone''s presence as I currently longed for his, and meanwhile, demons in my head painted cursed images of him torn apart, lifeless or simply not there. What if it had taken him instead? What if the beast hadn''t retreated but instead waited in the woods when ity its eyes upon Nathan who was waiting for me?This text is property of N?/velD/rama.Org.


    I shook the thoughts away.


    When I finally unlocked the door, I mmed it open and yelled out his name.


    "Nathan?" My voice was on the edge of desperation and the silence in my ear was deafening. "Nathan!" I called again and this time I heard shuffling from the loft.


    "Liliana?" I looked up to see his blue eyes look down at me, a little drowsy with sleep but clearing up immediately. "Liliana!"


    He almost jumped down the distance between the loft and the ground, only a step on thedder to lighten the fall.


    Before I could process what was happening his arms were around me, and I finally felt the relief wash over me as I realised that he was okay. That he was more than okay actually, that he was safe.


    "You weren''t here and I started imagining the worst and..." He started rambling in my ear, voicing his concern between kisses and holding my body as if it had been years instead of hours since west saw each other. I had barely had the time to get over my relief before he pushed me away to examine and search for any wounds or signs of danger, and while his expression revealed that he was satisfied with what he saw, his eyes met mine with a hint of scepticism.


    "I''m okay," I assured him the best I could even with my voice shaking uncontrobly. "I promise, but my father..." The words were barely audible. "My father is marrying me to another man." Nathan''s expression got stone cold. "Nathan, I don''t... I don''t want him. I don''t want to marry him..."


    By now my words were nothing more than mutters as I clunged to Nathan''s chest and buried my face into his corbone, allowing his scent to wrap around me like aforting nket. His arms were wrapped tightly around my body, holding me close as he let me pour out whatever emotions were overwhelming me until there was nothing left but the sound of my sniffling and my shivering body against his.


    "Liliana, are you sure?" Nathan finally asked. "Are you sure that you don''t want to marry him?"


    I reared back and almost lost my bnce in the process. "Of course, I''m sure," I didn''t mean for my voice to sound so hurt when I voiced my response. "How can you?... I don''t want to marry him. Not for him or the life he''s offering. I don''t want to be stuck with someone I don''t even know while also being forced to be someone I''m not." I met Nathan''s eyes. "I won''t be able to do it, I''ll rather die."


    Nathan took my hands and held them close to his chest. "Marry me?"


    I wasn''t sure if I''d heard right, but Nathan just continued.


    "I cannot offer you the freedom you want, the same way I''m not allowed to have my own, but I can protect you and give you a life better than this. And we can still have these stolen moments away from everyone else where you can be whoever you wish to be. But every other moment, be my wife Liliana Devalia, marry me and be my wife the way I''ll be your husband."


    It took me several moments before I even knew what to say, and even more to be able to voice them. My heart was soaring at its finest, screaming to every cell for me to ept something I thought I''d never be able to have. It ached for every beating moment I hadn''t said yes, but I had never had the luxury of only following my heart.


    "But your parents..." My traitorous mind spoke. "They''ll disapprove. I''m not of the ideal ss."


    "My parents will not be able to do a thing if the bond has already been sealed," Nathan exined, jaw tight with determination. "I''ll find someone that''ll wed us, and they know nothing of it until it''s toote."


    "They''ll punish you," I whispered, my mind still notprehending the conversation he was having.


    "I am their only son," Nathan said. "They will not do anything permanent." Then he hesitated a bit as his eyes studied me. "If you don''t want to, say that instead Liliana, because if you ept, whatever possible obstacle you cane up with in that brilliant mind of yours will be handled with my bare hands if necessary. I am willing to break everyw for you, but I won''t if it''s not to your desire."


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    "No!" I said hastily and realised how wrong it sounded when Nathan''s face fell. "Yes, yes I''ll marry you, Nathan. Of course, I''ll marry you."


    When the words were finally uttered, it felt like the heavy weights on my shoulders had finally been taken off, and I was finally allowed to fly again. Nathan''s expression reflected mine, bright and hopeful and his lips found mine before I could say it again, before I could ept his proposal over and over again until my tongue got tired of it. This kiss was like the first one we had, igniting and thrilling, like another secret that only we knew.


    "Will you really?" He asked again when we pulled apart, eyes wide and searching. "Will you really marry me?"


    I could only grin as I answered. "Yes, Nathan, I''ll really marry you."


    Something in his expression softened, and before I could foresee what was happening, my feet were off the ground and he was carrying me inside. Sensing where this was going, I wrapped my arms around his neck and ced my lips on his, responding to his gentle touches with a gasp that allowed his tongue entrance to explore my mouth.


    "Nathan," His name came out in a whisper as my back hit thedder that led to the loft.


    He pulled back for a moment and tilted his head.


    "Do you want me to stop?" He asked, his voice lower than usual.


    "No," I shook my head and took his face between my hands. "No, I just... We should climb up before one of us breaks a leg falling down thedder."


    He let out a sound that could only be a mix between a chuckle and a humph, the softest smile still stered on his face. We climbed up thedder as we said, both of us grinning like idiots because we were about to get married, because after about a year since that first kiss, we were finally engaged and I had never felt such excitement.


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    As soon as we both reached the top, Nathan pressed my back against the soft material that wasid out on the floor and his lips were back on mine, my senses only heightening by the touch of his hands roaming my body. "Nathan," I groaned when he finally started moving downwards, cing kisses on my neck and on the more sensitive spots near my jaw.


    "You''re wonderful," He said between kisses, ucing the strings that held together my rather inly made dress and allowing the chilly air to take a hold of my bare skin.


    I clung to his hair as he moved further down to my breast, dragging my dress lower and lower until it served no more purpose than a simple skirt. A moan rippled through my throat when he started sucking on my breast, his free hand massaging the other. I wrapped my legs around his waist and tried to focus on my breathing, but it was hard when the feeling of his wet warm tongue caressed my nipple. "You''re everything," He said when he pulled away, his eyes studying my naked upper half with hunger, pupils blown wide with lust.


    Without a further warning, he grabbed the ends of my clothes and pulled them down and off my body, taking my undergarments and everything else with him in one smooth move. By now my vagina was already wet, and my mind was far too aroused to think of anything but the longing for him inside me. Still, he took his time. He used two fingers to lightly massage my clit while he started sucking the skin around my thighs, leaving marks that were only for him and me to see. As the sensation built up, I could hear myself groaning and whimpering under his touch, a gasp escaping when his finger finally entered the hole. Nathan was quick to set up a pace, quick to chase whatever pleasure he could give me and alternate techniques depending on what my sounds revealed. Soon, he had two fingers in me, scissoring and curling until it hit a spot that caused my back to arch in pleasure. "Nathan," I managed to say as I gasped. "You... I..."


    As if he understood immediately, he withdrew his fingers, drawing an involuntary whimper from my lips.


    He quickly undressed, disregarding his shirt and his pants to wherever he''d thrown my clothes before and releasing his fully hard cock for my eyes to see the pree leaking from its head. As he crawled up to me, lining our bodies the same way we''d done many times before, I pulled his hair and pulled him into a desperate kiss, his lips separating almost immediately for my tongue to ess. As I lost myself in the kiss, Nathan decided that it was the right moment to strike, sliding his cock slowly into me until he was fully settled, causing me to leave trails of my nails on his back as I was caught off guard. The first thrusts were slow and careful, giving me time to adjust to his length inside of me. But once it was clear that I was ready, he started thrusting hard and fast, drawing moans and gasps until the sounds were nothing less than a harmony of pleasure echoing in the walls.


    But when his pace started to slow I knew that he was about to pull out. Still, I never got over how empty it made me feel every time he did. He reached for his cock in order to jerk himself off, but I swatted his hand away and took it in my own, jerking and twisting it until he came all over my hand, creating a mess between our bodies with my name as a cry on his lips.


    He slumped forwards and pulled me into his chest,pletely ignoring the stickiness as he wrapped his arms around me and I couldn''t find the energy to care about it either. As he held me close, I couldn''t help but smile against his chest, the knowledge that we soon would belong to each other a wonderful bliss as I entered thends of dreams.

 Chapter 6: A forced waistline and a secret plan

    How my father had been able to afford a dress sophisticated enough that it had a corset is knowledge out of my reach, but I''d never imagined myself longing back to the inness I always wore as much as I did while the maid behind me tightened the strings to the part where it was a struggle to even breathe. It was beautiful, there was no denying that. The colour was close to in pastel blue while its strings and details were a mix between white and pink. It was not enough for anyone to mistake me as one of the upper-ss people, but it was enough for dinner with the middle-ss messenger''s son.


    The maid that was currentlycing up my dress, was a family friend, or more specifically, an old friend of my mother. She''d been the one to bring me the dress and insisted that she''d help me because neither my father nor my brother had the delicacy of arranging a dress. I had been relieved at first, it was already too much that my father had forced me into a dinner with Hector Waby but having him try to fix my dress would only have worsened the situation, however, I would live to regret my relief. Mrs Ashington revealed herself to be a critic of everything I was doing, from the way my body wasn''t as thin as a leaf to the dirt under my nails. At one point she''d evenmented that my ent wasn''t sophisticated enough for a youngdy and that mynguage needed to be retrained in order for anyone to take me seriously in the future, even my fiance, a word that made me barf in my own mouth.


    "But then again," Mrs Ashington shrugged as she continued pinning down parts of the dress that needed slight adjustments. "Some husbands won''t let you talk at all so perhaps you might not even have to train how to speak properly, only how to shut up."


    The blood was boiling in my veins and I had to clench my fist in order to bite back a nastyment that would probably give thedy a heart attack.


    Since my return the night of my proposal, my father had had people fuzzing all over me, to prepare me for the month toe. If he remembered my reluctance or my protests, he revealed nothing. It slightly infuriated me, because it meant that he genuinely didn''t care anymore, that nothing I said could make him change his mind. But on the other hand, it made things so much easier.


    When Nathan and I woke up hours after the proposal, we took the time to form a n, to make sure that nothing would go wrong and that no one would know until it was toote to change it. Nathan told me that he might be able to find someone willing to wed us behind our parents'' backs, and until he did he would try to alternate some documents in our favour in case his parents actually decided to give out an unexpected punishment. I told him to be careful, and precise with every word he changed on his parents'' document, and to take his time, but we both knew that there wasn''t enough time to think through everything. In order for our wedding to go through, I had to marry him before my wedding day with Mr Waby, which meant that I had to marry Nathan within the span of one month and two weeks. For good measure, we set the wedding date exactly one month from the proposal date, with two weeks room for sudden changes. I didn''t really care when we were wed, only that it happened before I was forced to take someone else''s hand.


    The memory of Nathan''s promise was exactly what I needed in order to get my act together and take onest breath before Mrs Ashington finally finished tightening the corset. I would give them a show of the perfect wife, and then I''d see their faces when they realised that none of that had ever been intended for them.


    "You smile like a lunatic," Mrs Ashington startled me from my thoughts. "Someone should have taught you how to smile like ady. Poor Marianne, she would have hated to see her own daughter so undisciplined." I pretended that the mention of my mother didn''t hurt my soul. "So, all done."


    I looked back at the little mirror I had in front of me and despite her harsh words, Mrs Ashington had done a great job. I looked like any otherdy from the middle ss, perhaps not with skin as pristine and curves as full but I looked decent enough to blend in with the masses I''d scanned many times during the few festivals that our town held. That was back in the days when my only wish was to be one of them and please my mother. Now, my main wish held a different path.


    "Are we sure that''s my sister?" The voice that belonged to my brother disturbed the silence. His tall figure was leaning on the doorway, his brown curls slicked back as his eyes scanned my dress. "I mean, that could be any other person out there with brown hair and eyes for all I know."


    "You''re not funny," I responded as I took a step away from the mirror. "Not even a little bit."Belongs to (N)?vel/Drama.Org.


    My brother was far too amused to take my words seriously.


    "At least the dress will make someone happy."


    I shivered at the thought of what my afternoon held.


    "If she''s ready we shall go immediately," My brother now looked at Mrs Ashington. "You''ve done a wonderful job, and one we can''t let go to waste."


    Mrs Ashington blushed at the kindpliment. "It was next to nothing. Your family is always dear to me dear, Mr Varius."


    My brother nodded once before returning his gaze to me, his hand stretched out in an offering, one I dly took.


    I took him by the elbow when we finally stepped outside, and was grateful for the fresh air that filled my lungs, at least as much as I could manage with the corset still tight around my waist. On my way there, we were greeted by many, most of who recognised my brother as one from the security forces but some topliment my dress and me for my engagement. Words have always travelled fast in small towns, so it did not surprise me that most of them knew already. However, those who took it a step further and told me what a great opportunity this was made me want to puke all over the dress. The messenger''s son was willing to marry me for one reason and that reason only, he was as desperate as my father was. While he might be a middle-ss man, he carried himself like a coward. Rumours about people talking about the skinny Waby son had been heard for many years, and even if his desperation had made him willing to marry a ss beneath him, there were still people even in the poorer parts of town that refused to marry a twig, his height being his only socially appreciated feature.


    Even if his looks did disturb me somehow, that he had lived with enough money that he hadn''t had to move enough to grow muscles, it was mainly his personality that made this marriage impossible. Perhaps his status could give me a little better life than the one I currently had with a nicer home and better food, but that was about everything he had to offer. He was not one to go out to seek adventure or knowledge, people even said that while the intellects from the middle ss would gather around and discuss philosophical matters, Hector wouldn''t even have made it past the first page and while the stronger boys would swim in the coldest rivers, he could hide under the shadow of a tree. Perhaps he had a kind heart, perhaps even the kindest there was, but I knew that nothing about me and my longing for the adrenaline only the outer world could offer would fit with him and his fear of everything.


    But despite everything, I was in front of his door, ready to y his fiance.

 Chapter 7: The tragedy of the ladybug

    We waited for a while before someone finally opened the door to the house that belonged to the Waby family. The woman that opened was short and wrinkled, with a kind smile but suspicious eyes as she studied me and my brother. It took me a while to realise that this was Hector Waby''s mother, the relevance in their resembling noses and thin lips. When she must have realised who we were and why we were here, her eyes widened, and she finally spoke. "Could you possibly be Miss Liliana?" She asked carefully, scanning me from head to toe.


    "Yes, ma''am,¡± I replied as kindly as I could but she only narrowed her eyes at me.


    "Are you sure about that?" Her voice was far more sceptical now, and she pinned me down with her gaze. "I was told that she was uncontrolled, a little bit of a savage ording to others."


    Before I could even figure out how to respond to the usation, my brother took a step forward and entered the conversation.


    "I can assure you that she''s none of that," My brother spoke calmly. "And I am sad to hear that you would believe such rumours."


    Mrs Waby''s ears turned pink as she realised that she''d just openly offended me in front of my brother.


    "O-of c-course not," She stammered as she looked at the floor. "I would never... Why don''t youe in?"


    My brother turned to me this time. "It seems like it is my time to head out, dear sister. Do try to behave." I threw Varius a burning re before he turned back to Mrs Waby. "Thank you and your husband for your hospitality. I''lle backter this evening to take my sister home."


    "Of course sir. Your sister is in good hands."


    And with that, my brother was gone and I was left alone with Mrs Waby, whose shoulders were still stumped from embarrassment. I considered telling her that I took no offence by her words but quickly realised that she''d probably prefer it if it wasn''t mentioned at all.


    As expected their house was bigger than our own, nowhere near the mansions that the upper ss spent their days in but still better than the cottage that was my family''s home. Mrs Waby led me through the hall and into the living room that also served as a dining room where three people were already waiting, all male and only one of them recognisable.


    "She''s here," The wife chirped, too bright inparison to her tone before. The three men turned their attention to me and I quickly lowered my head to hide the fact that I was biting my tongue, preventing me from identally speaking first.


    "It''s an honour to have you here," The oldest man said, probably Mr Waby himself. He was nothing like Hector, his frame tall and his muscle lean but strong for his age, the third person was more his son than Hector could ever be, with the same determined eyes and glowing attitude that their youngestcked.


    "Thank you for inviting me to your home," I said in the sweetest way I possibly could.


    "Is this her?" The stranger asked, looking between his brother who only stared at the floor and me in disbelief. "I thought you said she was a low-lifer?"


    "She is from the lower ss," His father responded. "But that is nothing to judge, Christoff. She''s still a guest in our house and you shall treat her as such."


    "Yes father," Christoff responded but his hungry eyes still looked at me as if I was some kind of prey.


    "Hector, aren''t you going to wee our guest?" His mother asked and finally, Hector looked up, a blush spreading on his cheeks as our eyes met.


    "Greetings Miss Liliana," He said carefully. "You look lovely today." I then realised that he was the only one in the room that had seen what I usually looked like, and probably knew that all this was prepared for him. "You are too kind," I managed to force out.


    "Why don''t Hector show you around?" His mother suggested beside me, her voice startling me from my careful inspection of the one I was supposed to marry. "Meanwhile I''ll prepare dinner."


    Hector, after hearing his father clearing his throat in warning, offered his hand and led me away from the family. Not really bothering to reply to the mocking goodbye his brother sent our way. I pitied Hector as he showed me the house, not only wasn''t it enough to explore until dinner was prepared but it was rather obvious that he was nervous and that his brother''s taunts didn''t really help his situation. I was almost afraid that he''d die from a heart attack the second a mouse from the dark corners sneezed.


    "So that was about it," Hector said finally. "Is there something else you would like to see or do?"


    I tried toe up with something, just so that we could avoid the awkward silence that would happen if I didn''t, but it wasn''t an easy task. The house wasn''t big and Hector held no interests I could ask questions about, not like his brother and his hunting, nor his father and his devoted love for literature.


    "Do you have a garden perhaps?" I then asked. "You haven''t taken me there."


    Hector''s eyes widened slightly but he nodded anyway, eagerly taking us away from the empty ce where we''d just been. None from the lower ss had gardens, there was a house and then there was the space around it, sometimes upied by other people''s houses or sometimes just ces for old barns or an endless forest. I had heard manydies speaking about the rich gardens, the ones with perfectly arranged flowers and bushes cut into all kinds of shapes and sizes suitable for the aesthetic of the living, but most would die before they even got the chance toy a foot on a garden as beautiful as the ones in their dreams.


    The family Waby''s garden wasn''t as beautiful as thedies described, but it was still a garden with a few growing flowers and a tree by the end of it all.


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    "It''s not much," Hector said from behind me. "Mainly grass and a tree."


    "What kind of flowers are they?" I asked, hoping that at least the flower could lead to a decent conversation, otherwise this month of courting would be harder than I expected.


    "Uh, I don''t know," Hector admitted, shame rising on his face. "They''re my mother''s. I know the roses, but that is about that."


    "Oh roses," I said, desperate for something to hold onto. "They are loved by many. Do you have a favourite flower, Hector?"


    The olive branch I thought would ease Hector''s stiffness, only made him widen his eyes and stutter in embarrassment.


    "I-I''m not g-good at flower un... unfortunately," Hector forced out, and then when he saw my expecting gaze, he took a moment to gain confidence before continuing. "Do you have one Miss Liliana?"


    I was so relieved that this wouldn''t be a one-sided conversation. "Purple Asters," I replied. "They would always grow close to where I lived and sometimes there were ces in the forest full of them."


    I stopped abruptly when I realised that I''d just revealed that I spent time in the forest, but Hector didn''t seem to notice.


    "Oh," He said thoughtfully. "I''m not a great fan of the forest honestly. There is too much unevenness in the woods and wildness lurking behind shadows." He said as if there weren''t enough reasons to why I couldn''t marry him.


    "Well, what ces do you enjoy then, Mr Waby," I asked out of curiosity and as an attempt to keep the conversation going.


    "Well..." He said slowly. "I like te kschten..." Thest words were nothing more than mumblings.


    "I''m sorry," I said, watching as the blood turned his entire face red.


    "The kitchen," He said again, still low, but enough for me to catch.


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    "Oh," I said, taken back by the surprising response, but quickly collected myself when I saw that he was about to shy away. "Cooking or baking? Or just watching your mother?"


    I felt a pang of guilt when I saw the surprise in his eyes. Even if Hector wasn''t someone for me, there was no doubt that he was just a case of a soft heart in a world that required him to have a brave one. I tried tofort myself with the hopes that someone else would marry him, someone as shy as him.


    "Baking," Hector shrugged. "I rarely do it but I loved it as a child."


    "Really, tell me more about it? What did you bake?"


    Hector was eyeing me suspiciously, but I couldn''t determine whether it was because of my too-joyful tone or if it was because he''d beenughed at so many times that he expected me to do the same.


    "Mainly pastries," He finally revealed when he''de to the conclusion that I wasn''t mocking him.


    He was about to continue when his eyes suddenly widened in fear and he took three steps away from me, a finger pointed at my left shoulder.


    "Watch out," He said from a distance, his voice squeaky and hand trembling.


    I looked down to see a reddybug on my shoulder, crawling on my dress in the belief that the colourful material belonged to the pedals of a flower.


    "Oh, it''s just adybug," I said as I took it in my hand. "They''re harmless."


    But when I tried to show it to Hector he let out a high-pitched shriek and swatted away my hand, startling both thedybug who took off and me in the process.


    "Don''te near me with it, they can carry diseases," Hector was still breathing heavily and shaking badly.


    "I assure you," I tried. "They are harmle..."


    "No!" He interrupted me and then took my hand. "Let''s go inside before moree to gue us."


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 Chapter 8: The bigger coward

    The dinner had been even more disastrous than the little incident in the garden. His brother hadn''t held back anyments about his brother''sck of manliness and it got to the point where I had to dig my nails into my palms to keep myself from jumping from my chair and give Christoff a piece of my mind. Meanwhile, Hector only cowered under his brother''s mean words, only getting smaller and more awkward with every passing moment. At some point at dessert, he''d awkwardly taken my hand out of nowhere and I had jumped so violently at the suddenness that Christoff''s grin grew into something that could only be described as malice. Hector, embarrassed by my reaction, immediately retreated his hand and kept it to himself the rest of the night.


    When my brother finally knocked on the door, it felt as if I was let out of a prison. I''d never expected myself to be so happy seeing him again, but I was, my heart was singing in harmony because I was. However, as I subtly tried to get away from the Waby family, without seeming too eager, I felt a hand grab mine, a weak grip indeed, but still enough to stop me and have me turn around in surprise. "I''m d I get to marry you," Hector said, eyes on the floor and ears dusted pink. "You are very beautiful.¡±


    A wave of guilt came over me as I watched Hector''s nervous figure. I had hoped that despite my act to y nice, Hector would realise that we could never be anything to each other and therefore not take my scheme too hard on the heart. But him, standing in front of me as he did with his shoulders up in his ears and an embarrassed smile on his lips told me that it was not the case, and that I would crush whatever confidence he had left by marrying Nathan. Hector was a kind man, but he wasn''t one for me. Still, I had to swallow down my own shame as I spoke.


    "You are far too kind, Mr Hector," I gave him a truth. "And I''m looking forward to theing month and weeks." And then ended with a bitter lie he wouldn''t be able to decipher until it was toote.


    "Thank you for taking care of my sister," Varius spoke on behalf of us both. We''re looking forward to the joint family dinners weeks from now."


    "So do we," Hector''s father responded. "I must say, we really got more than what we bargained for in this arrangement. Liliana has be quite a surprise. In a good way of course."


    I ignored my instinct to snarl at his words.


    "I''m pleased to hear," My brother said, even his tone was a little strained. "We''ll hear from you."


    They both shook hands onest time before my brother offered his elbow and escorted me out of their house and down the empty streets. I did not miss the way my brother was ncing at me from the corner of his eye as we walked in silence, but I did not feel the appeal of disturbing the peace that hung in the air. However, I lost my patience when we finally reached the poor quarters and stopped in a halt before turning to face Varius.


    "What?" I asked with my hands resting on my sides and a raised brow.


    "Took you long enough," My brother muttered but said nothing more as he studied me carefully. "Well?..."


    "I didn''t actually expect you to behave," Varius admitted as he narrowed his eyes. "This isn''t exactly your choice, and the Liliana I know would have brought hell upon everyone who didn''t listen to your opinion."


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    I gave myself a moment to be amused by the vision the usation caused. "Well, I can''t really do anything, can I? Father has already made the decision for me."


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    "That has never stopped you before," Varius pointed out. "Not when he didn''t want you running around in town and certainly not when he refused to have you spend time reading."


    "I still think reading is a useful skill," I frowned at the memory of that argument. "And I proved father wrong by making deals with the town''s butcher."


    Which was a lie, of course, but none of them needed to know that. If they ever found out about the hunts in the woods there would be more than just an argument going on under our roof. "Yeah you certainly did, so why now? Why settle now?"


    I had not expected anyone toment on my sudden change of behaviour, even less from my brother.


    "Because I don''t want to have another conflict about marriage," I whispered and based on the shadow that pulled over Varius'' face, he''d understood what I meant.


    It was a horrible card to pull, an evil maniption from my side, but it was also the only thing I could have said that was enough to convince Varius. We barely spoke about our mother''s death, and when we did, it was always in arguments. It was not aplete lie, because the moment my father had introduced Hector as my husband-to-be, my mind had shed back to the night my mother died and the argument we had before, but like many things, I pressed all possible emotions until they no longer existed and hoped that I''d get peace the day the beast died under my hands.


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    I don''t know if my brother mes our mother''s death on me. It was after all my fault that she slept on the couch that night because I refused to go into the house. I hadpletely forgotten that it was a full moon that night in the haste of everything and would live to regret that mistake for the rest of my life. If Varius mes me for our mother''s death, he hasn''t said anything, and I''m not sure if I could handle him telling the truth.


    "At least Hector seems to have taken a genuine interest in you," My brother muttered, unaware of the extra guilt he just added to my shoulders.


    "He''s just... misunderstood," I tried, hearing how off the tone was but doing nothing to save it.


    "He''s not the type of person I would have chosen for you," Varius admitted. "More money than us or not, even his brother is a better choice."


    "His brother is almost as much of a coward as he is," I immediately pointed out. "Hector may be afraid of much, but his brother doesn''t even dare to stand up for his family. That is more cowardly than anything."


    My brother only chuckled at my response. "It''s a little hard to stand up for someone who''ll break under the weight of a leaf."


    I knew that it was an attempt to joke, to lighten the mood after the indirect mention of our mother had brought in heavy clouds but I couldn''t help but feel my anger re up at the obvious insult.


    "And if it was me?" I asked instead. "If I was the one who feared everything and everyone. Would you have let them talk?"


    My brother froze when he heard my question, but answered without hesitation. "I would kill the beast with my bare hands if those were the requirements for protecting my family."

 Chapter 9: Nightmares and Countdowns

    I released the arrow and shut my ears just in time to shut out the sound of the whimpering animal. Most times, the hunting part wasn''t even the worst part of it, it was when Iter had to take an innocent life for selfish reasons such as survival. Through my years of practice, I''ve learned how to shut out the overwhelming emotions by making sure to at least give my respects to the creatures and kill them in the most peaceful way possible. But there were days when not even that was enough, and this was one of those days. If it had been up to me, I would have preferred to skip the hunting for the day, but it had been too long since I checked my traps due to the marriage scheme and we were getting short on other provisions at home.


    As I took the bunny my arrow had perched, and started walking towards where I knew one of my most sessful traps was located, my mind wandered back to the previous month, to the second the beast had hovered over me with just seconds between that moment and the moment that should have been thest in my life. That was another reason why I had avoided the woods as much as I possibly could, when the darkest shadow overruled the forest it was as if I was back to the month before, and the fact that we were reaching a new month meant nothing to the nightmares that sometimes haunted me at night.Belongs to (N)?vel/Drama.Org.


    It was always the same, its bloody teeth andrge body over mine. A howl at the full moon before its gaze turned back to me who was frozen against the cold ground, unable to move and unable to scream, the golden eyes like glowing orbs in the dark. I would wake up gasping, as if it was actually myst breath I was taking before the end and it always took me several moments to collect myself and return to a normal breathing speed. Tonight had been one of those nights, because I knew that the following night was a full moon. And even if I''d tried to forget, it was all the town could talk about.


    They had been divided into two groups, those who believed in a miracle and heard prayers, iming that the curse had finally reached its end and those who spoke about the calm before the storm, trying to warn everyone that would listen that tonight was going to be theirst night of peace, and that by tomorrow, the survivors (if there were any survivor) would find nothing but blood on the streets and corpse after corpse piled up on one another. Thetter believers had tried to do their best to secure their homes as much as they could, surrounding them with traps and obstacles that they believed would slow down the beast. The really ambitious ones had even taken the month to just cover their homes with y until it dried out and worked as an extrayer around the house, while others had rented trees in the hopes that it would camouge their homes enough for the beast to walk past them.


    I did not believe in the miracle some spoke about because I had stared the beast right in the eyes, and seen that it wanted nothing more than just blood. But I wasn''t so sure about the massacre either, because I knew why the beast hadn''t left anything behind that night, because I got away. No one knew of this encounter, not my family, not the rest of the vige and certainly not Nathan who would have had me locked up for my own safety under the fear that the beast would havee back to start looking for me. The rest just wouldn''t believe me, because I was a girl and because it was impossible.


    None had faced the beast and survived.


    The sound of faraway steps brought my mind back to my body, and out of instinct, I ced an arrow on my bow, preparing for an unpleasant surprise and to act out of self-defence. The light feathers were familiar under my fingertips, and the tension of my bow string an assurance I could rely on. I focused on the sound around me to hear if anything would reveal what was approaching and where its current location was.


    A stick snapped under something''s weight, and I quickly turned to the left with my bow in my hand, the string almost vibrating under the tension I''d forced it into.


    "Come out whoever you are," I said loudly to make sure that the intruder heard. "Or I''ll have to warn you that I don''t miss."


    An auburn-haired boy stepped out from behind thergest tree with his hands in the air, palms facing me in a request for peace. I released a breath I didn''t know I was holding when his familiar grin greeted me and slowly lowered my bow, only releasing the tension from the bowstring when the arrow was facing the ground.


    "Nathan!" I exim slightly furious. "I could have killed you!"


    The boy just seemed amused by the thought. "You wouldn''t."


    "I could have!" I protested. "How did you find me out here anyway?"


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    Nathan approached me slowly, releasing the grip on my bow until it fell on the ground so that he could now take my free hand and bring it to his lips, cing soft kisses on my knuckles as if they belonged to a Queen''s hand. "Perhaps I''m not as devoted as you," Nathan spoke fondly. "But I have listened, and learned enough about tracking and you to track you in these woods."


    Something in my chest warmed at the thought.


    "You still shouldn''t sneak up on me," I pointed out, the fury subsiding into something else.


    "Perhaps not, but I was tired of waiting at the cottage and I wanted to see you," Nathan shrugged as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "Can''t a man check up on his fianc¨¦ while she''s elegantly murdering animals in the woods?" Nathan referring to me as his fianc¨¦ still made my heart skip a beat and my cheeks get dusted with an embarrassing bright pink.


    It had almost been a month since his proposal, and even if the wedding nning for a wedding I wasn''t going to attend, with money we didn''t really have, was exhausting to the point where I some night was unconscious before my head was on the pillow, I often found myself dreaming of the wedding I would have with Nathan, and that was enough to keep the spirit going. Our ceremony was in three days, and Nathan had managed to find a priest that would bound us and two witnesses that would say nothing about it until it was all over. He had apologised when he had exined that the wedding wouldn''t be anything exceptional, due to all the secrecy, but I couldn''t even find myself minding theck of elegance when the n was in order, leaving only time as our enemy. Time and an awful variety of dull-coloured napkins I had to choose for the other wedding.


    The month hadn''t been difficult in its sense, but it was exhausting to the mind. Even if my choices didn''t really matter in the end, there was still so much the Waby family wanted to get in order. Mrs Waby had been the most insistent one, iming that the person who was going to marry her precious son needed to at least have a respectable service so that she could brag during the following housewives'' tea party. There had been a long list of guests, days of picking out random objects like napkins, candles, flower arrangements, cutlery (even if the Waby family only had one they were satisfied with), trying on all kinds of dresses and taste-testing cakes (even if there only was one edible choice) and picking songs for the orchestra. Some parts had been enjoyable enough, like the cake testing and the orchestra, however, every time Hector showed me any type of affection, I got nauseous with guilt. He''d gotten bolder as the days passed, more confident every time I forced augh or didn''t shy away from his touch, and I had just felt worse.


    Nathan had assured me that we could remain friends with Hector after it all, if he ever found the heart to forgive me, but I wasn''t sure if it was Hector''s hate that would prevent that, or my own self-loathing knowing that I tricked a person who''d done me no harm. I could barely face him now, how was I supposed to look him in the eye after it was revealed that I was married to someone else? I wasn''t even sure if Hector would hate me for it. He would feel a stab of betrayal, yes, but if I knew him right, he would think that this had something to do with him, and knowing that only made the situation worse.


    "Are you okay?" Nathan suddenly asked with genuine concern in his voice as his hand brushed back a strand of hair from my face, eyes searching into my soul.


    "Yeah," I said, a partial truth as I rxed into his touch. "I''m okay."


    "Three days from now," He said, cing his lips gently on my forehead.


    "Three days from now," I found myself echoing, counting every passing second.

 Chapter 10: Its return

    This was the first night in many months that I spent in my bed while the full moon was over us. My vow to y the beast wasn''t anything less important only because I was haunted by its terrifying looks, but this month I had too much at stake to go and temper with the beast. I didn''t need to give father a reason to hasten the wedding with Waby, not when his fear for my life had been the reason for my sudden marriage after all. When my father had asked me about my sudden change of behaviour, I had just med it on the wedding, iming that the nerves had me exhausted every night and I tried to get as much sleep as possible before the hecticst days before the never-happening-wedding in two weeks. Despite thefort of my bed, I could not sleep. Perhaps it was a habit, perhaps it was fear, but I just turned and twisted under the poor excuse of aforter as my instincts listened and searched like they always did, for a howl, for a temperature drop, for a sound that was out of ce, but tonight I heard nothing, which wasn''t too umon. On nights when it hunted the rich instead of the poor, we would hear nothing until the morning around and the wails of a mother or a father, woke the town, perhaps alongside a sister or a brother, and a lover if the victim had one, the same way the rich''s nights were peaceful on months when the beast hunted amongst the poor.


    No one knew what its hunting pattern was, and why it choose the victims it did. All that was known is the fact that when a target is chosen, it doesn''t matter how much blood it spills to reach them, the target is always stone dead by sunrise. Rows and rows of soldiers can stand as a defence line against the beast, and it can y every single one of them, but it is not satisfied until the selected victim meets the same fate, it was proven the month when its target had been one of the riches in the vige, the daughter of a general. People still talked about how bravely the soldier fought in order to protect the general''s most prized possession, just to die with her body on top of the pile of corpses. That same morning, the representatives of the vige had created a neww for everyone, that on the night of the full moon, everyone was to remain off duty, despite social status or wealth, if one was to die, they deserved to do it around their family. It was the fog in front of my lips that made me realise what I should have paid attention to sooner, the temperature had dropped. I cursed somewhere in my mind as I reached for my dagger under the pillow, tightening the grip until my knuckles ached. There were many in the area, anyone could be its victim, but it didn''t help my thoughts as my mind shed back to the moment in the woods. Perhaps it would mark me again because I escapedst time, perhaps it had returned for vengeance, my scent imprinted and amplified in its mind as the days passed.


    For a second, I hoped that it was just my thoughts running free, but the hopes soon shattered when I heard our front door break in.


    I was up and out of the bed in a second, one dagger still clenched in my hand as I reached for the cold handle of another, thanking myself for preparing withfortable clothes to move in in case my fears were toe true. Beside me, the door that connected my brother''s and father''s room to mine was hastily opened but the action was still quiet as they both knew that a single sound could be our doom.


    My brother looked at me with wide eyes, hands gripping his gear tightly as his eyes darted from me to my door. Father was behind him, even him with a weapon in his hand, the axe he used to cut wood, perhaps not the best weapon, but it was better than being left defenceless.


    Varius silently formed words with his mouth, asking me if I had seen anything after the sound of the door had caught our attention but I just shook my head, the light under my bedroom door leaving no clue as to whether this was a burr or a beast. We all turned our attention to the door, listening to whatever could be on the other side, but we were only greeted by silence, one so loud that it was even more haunting than it should have been.Text content ? N?velDrama.Org.


    After a few moments, the hesitation was obvious in our stances, and Varius, my father and I continued exchanging nces to see if there were any signs that it was still out there. When nothing happens, Varius takes a step forward, causing me to reach out my hand to stop him from whatever he''s thinking, but he snatches it back and gives me a look that reveals that he''s thinking what I''m thinking, that whether it is out there or not, we need to know. If it isn''t, it''ll feel like we''ve dodged a bullet, but if it is, our fate was inevitable anyway.


    Varius ces his hand on the handle and takes a deep breath as he prepares himself for the unknown, but he never gets the chance to follow through with his actions.


    Therge beast storms so violently that it causes my brother to fly across the entire room, the impact knocking the breath out of him for a second. His name was at the tip of my tongue when I let out a horrified cry but my brother only got his eyes on the beast in front of him. Our house was small, and the distance between the roof and the floor even smaller, that was probably why the beast looked ten times bigger in our house than it had done in the woods.


    Its pale almost snow-white fur glistened in the light that the torn-up door opening let in and once again, it could only be described as an abomination between a wolf, a lion and a man. It was on two feet, most of its lower body covered in fur while its upper half was a little less animal-like, and a little more human-like, still with untamed fur growing in ways that were unnatural for any man. Meanwhile, the face reminded of a man''s, it had sharp teeth almost too big for its jaw and ears like the elves we would hear stories about but the most significant part of it was its eyes; feral, glowing, golden, deadly. It let out another howl before it turned its attention to me, and I was frozen in my spot as I watched in approach. "Liliana watch out!" A voice beside me screamed before someone knocked me over, pushing me away just moments before I was within its reach.


    The impact woke the muscles in my body, and I quickly turned around just in time to see my father throwing himself on the beast trying to cut off whatever limb it could ess with his axe, but the beast had too many advantages, the extra two heads in length only being one of them along with strength and speed. It raised its arm to sh my father with its long talons, but used the element of surprise to stab him in the back, right on the shoulder de of his raised arm. It growled in pain and swung with its arm, sending me crashing against the cab where most of my clothes were, its talons cutting open a wound in the process.


    At the scent of blood, it turned around and faced me. For a moment, it seemed like it was frozen on the spot, eyes unreadable and head tilted to one side, an action too human to fit the murderous beast in front of me. It looked at the blood and back to me and I wondered if this was people meant with the calm before the storm, if it was studying me to savour me for a moment before it wouldunch itself upon me. My heart was beating violently in my chest and my arm ached from where the blood continued to soak my shirt.


    Somewhere on my right, my brother was yelling my name, and suddenly, there was a gunshot.


    The wound that should have been fatal for any living creature, only seemed to anger the beast, and it directed its anger towards where my brother stood in my room, hands shaking but gun prepared to fire another shot between the beast''s eyes. He never got the chance to as it threw itself over him, tackling him to the ground as it opened its jaw to take its first bite for the evening.


    I scrambled to my feet again, ignoring the thundering in my arm again as I threw myself upon the beast''s back, stabbing it over and over again as I screamed in a fury. "Don''t you dare hurt my brother!" I yelled as my arm continued its motion and steel met flesh.


    The beast staggered back from my brother, who was still alive based on the desperate gasps I heard from underneath us and towered over me, a mean growl on its face as it cornered me. I could barely breathe as it pierced me with its stone- cold look. Somewhere in the middle of it all, my father tried to attack the beast just like I had, but it shoved him without any signs of struggle and I heard the wall break as his body went through, but saw nothing but the beast before me. Whatever happened afterwards, happened in a blur. Its beast-like hand was around my throat even before I could scream and as if I hadn''t had trouble breathing already with the blood and the adrenaline leaving my clothes, this was thest step to desperation. But no matter how many times I tried to stab it with my dagger, my strength significantly decreasing for every passing second of lost oxygen, its grip never faltered.


    In the end, the world left me with nothing but the sound of my brother screaming my name and the feeling of my feet leaving the ground.

 Chapter 11: The steep-walled Canyon

    When I woke up, the first thing I noticed was how sore my throat was. It was not one''s typical losing-your-voice-after-a-whole-day-of screaming, more like someone had reached into your throat and ripped out your vocal cords. I even reached up to touch my throat just to feel if anything was different, only to identally touch bruises I wasn''t aware were there and send a shing pain through the nerve system.


    The shock of the pain became what brought the memories back.


    Vivid images of the beast and my family shed before my eyes and a startled out of breath, my suddenness knocking out the breath of me and causing me to hunch over the ache that spread through my left side. It took me another moment to realise that I wasn''t in a room I recognised. The decor was nothing like the town''s infirmary, and looking back at the bed, it had beenrger and morefortable than any bed I''d ever slept in.


    That was when a boy suddenly came in, a tray in his hand with food that made my stomach growl in longing. The boy froze when he realised that I was awake, and stared at me with wide eyes before returning to a somehow more uncaring expression.


    "You''re awake," He said slowly as he put down the tray of food on the nightstand. "How are you feeling?"


    When he reached out for me I flinched away from his touch, still not understanding where I was, how I got here and who the hell he was. He took the hint and turned his attention back to the tray, allowing me to take a moment and study him. He was taller than me, I would have guessed about a head above my own height but it was difficult to estimate when he was hunched over the tray of food. While his body was clearly muscr, the muscles revealing themselves under his half- buttoned shirt, his features were sharp rather than round and buffy like the jacked-up boys that spent their days cutting wood for survival. However, as beautiful as his body figure might have been, it was his extraordinary hair that caught my attention. On the top of his head, he had hair almost as white as snow flowing naturally with the shape of his face, a colour I''d never seen anyone have before. Even if the room was dimly lit with candles, his hair seemed to glow like an ethereal being of its own.


    He turned his face back to me, but instead of approaching like I''d expected he''d done, he took a step back and raised his hands in the air, his palms facing me.


    "You should try to drink the tea," He said and gestured at the tray. "It''ll help your throat."


    I looked at the tray and then back at him with suspicion, hoping that he got my question through my silent re since my throat was in no condition of even uttering a whimper.


    "It''s not poisoned," He said, tilting his head. "If I wanted you dead, I would have done it while you were knocked out unconscious."


    He had a point, but I was also aware that there were all kinds of messed up people in the world, and sometimes death wasn''t the worst thing one could do to another. So I took a step away from the tray, and continued staring at him. "I''ll take a sip out of it myself to prove it," He offered and waited to see if there were any signs of protest. When there weren''t, he reached for the ss and took an obvious gulp out of the tea himself, his eyes remaining on me throughout the entire process and when he took a few steps back again.


    When I decided that I had waited long enough, I finally gave in to the relented aching in my throat and reached for the lukewarm teacup that was somehow in the perfect temperature for a sip. The sweet honey tea went down my throat like magic and I let out a sigh of relief as I felt the liquid gently covering my dried-out vocal cords. Not wanting to seem too eager, I ced down the cup again and looked back at the boy.


    "Who are you?" My voice was still raspy but it would have to do. "And where am I?"


    "I''m Riven," The boy exined with a too casual voice. "And you''re at my home."


    "How did I get there? What happened to the beast? And my family?"


    Riven tensed at this set of questions, but quickly covered it up with a reassuring smile.


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    "It''s a lot of details to go through, but I can promise you that you''re safe here."


    His eyes met mine, and my breath hitched. They were not golden and glowing, nor were they feral and murderous, but the simrity was still there, hiding behind his green irises and kind eyes. The beast''s eyes were staring right at me, but this time, in the form of a boy.


    "Oh," He must have realised that I had figured it out.


    Before he could even consider his next move, I pushed him away from the door and bolted out of the room, relieved to see an exit not too far away from my current location. Behind me, Riven shouted at me, urging me to wait up so that he could exin, but I didn''t want an exnation from a murderer so I just ignored the aching in my body and ran for the door.


    When I finally got out of the building, I quickly ran towards the first direction I could see in the hopes that he would lose me on the way if I got a head start, but my hopes were quickly shattered when I finally took in the scenery in front of me. All around us were high mountains, like a wall cutting us out of the world. While the area itself was ratherrge and organised, there was no way out, not with mountains so high that you would die before even reaching the top, almost like guards keeping things out, or us in.


    "It''s a steep-walled canyon," A voice behind me said and I turned around to see Riven standing a bit further away, not daring toe any closer. "The mountains are unclimbable without someone to help you from the top, and the river," He pointed at a water source not too far away that divided the mountain in two. "Will drown you before you''ve even reached the other side. Trust me, I''ve tried."


    "Why?!" I yelled at him despite my protesting vocal cords. "Why did you take me here?"


    He looked stricken by my question. "I''ll exin everything," He promised, a promise that felt like a bitter lie. "I''ll exin everything, juste back in, you need to calm down so that you don''t mess up the stitches."


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    Only then did I remember the deep wound on my arm and looked down to see that a part of my clothing had been cut off, revealing a clean but irritated stitched-up wound. With everything going on, I had been able to ignore the pain that sent an aching difort through my body, but now when the wound was under my direct attention, I realised how badly it stung. Still, I turned back to the white-haired boy. "You''re the beast," I responded. "You have killed many in my vige."


    "The correct term is werewolf," He had the audacity to correct me. "And that usation is notpletely right. A part of me has killed many, but that wasn''t necessarily me."


    I frowned as I processed his words. "What exactly is that supposed to mean?"


    I could hear him sigh despite the grand distance between us. "If youe inside, I''ll exin." My hesitation must have been obvious on my face because he sighed again. "Listen. You won''t be able to get out of here alive. Just look around if you don''t trust me."


    I did, but it was not to see if he was right or not. I knew he was, I just needed a moment to look at something else rather than the boy in front of me, a boy that turned into a murderous beast every month, a werewolf.


    "You don''t have any other choice," He continued when he saw my resignation. "I''ll exin everything inside. There''s food and water for you as well. It''ll be better than just standing out here."Text content ? N?velDrama.Org.


    My pride told me to protest, but I knew very well that it was no point. So despite all the cells in my body telling me to run, I followed Riven inside.

 Chapter 12: The cursed boy

    Once inside, Riven was quick to manoeuvre the tray from the bedroom to the table in the living room, the same room I rushed through to get to the exit door that led me nowhere. By now the food was cold, but the growling in my stomach told me that I didn''t really care as long as it was edible. As if he was some kind of gentleman, Riven pulled out on of the chairs on one side of the table only to round it and take the opposite one, and I was far too exhausted to continue my constant scepticism so I took a seat and gratefully epted the te of food that he pushed over to me. It was nothing too advanced, some roasted tomatoes, cold sliced meat and soft bread alongside with my cold tea and a ss of juice. "Don''t eat too fast," Riven warned when he saw how I was about to inhale the food. "You''ll regret itter."


    I red at him, but did as he said and allowed the silence to overtake us both until I swallowed everything down with the ss of juice.


    "Okay," I said as I ced everything organised on the te again. "You wanted to exin."


    "More correctly, you wanted an exnation, I prefer not to actually," Riven responded and I raised my brow at him, causing him to sigh. "Some things you''ve already figured out."


    I nodded slowly and found myself slowly leaning closer to the table in anticipation.Text content ? N?velDrama.Org.


    "I am the werewolf, or more it''s a part of me," Riven exined. "Every full moon, he gets the strength to take over our shared body and do whatever it is he wants to."


    "Like murdering innocent people," I pointed out. "ughtering them until their corpses be unrecognisable."


    "Something like that," He admitted and his causality caused a re in my anger.


    "So where are we, exactly?" I asked, hand gesturing to the building around us and mind referring to the area within the walls. "Why are we here?"


    "For me to exin that, I first have to exin how I became this half-creature," Riven responded.


    "You weren''t always like this?" I asked surprised and he shook his head.


    Logically I knew this. The town hadn''t always been haunted, it had started some years ago which I suspected was around the same time that Riven became the thing he was today. But I could not imagine what a person would have had to do in order to serve such a punishment from the gods that one would turn into a beast once a month.


    "What did you do?"


    When he heard my question, he only grinned as if he''d been waiting for this moment. "I made a deal with a witch."


    My breath hitched in surprise.


    People have always talked about the super natural, some believed in magic while others imed that the only creatures over us were the gods themselves. I never really knew where I stood when it came to that discussion. The beast alone had been a counter-proof of the religious believer''s sayings, but that did not mean that it had been magic. Hearing Riven mention a witch without as much as an afterthought made me wonder if magic''s existence had another role in other parts of the kingdom. Since the monthly visits of the beast, fewer and fewer people left the town, the same way fewer and fewer foreigners came to visit. Traders were usually the only ones that dared to visit, knowing that the town was desperate and willing to pay a lot for products they couldn''t produce themselves. But they never stayed until dark, instead, they always made sure to be out of our woods hours before the night even settled.


    "A witch?" The doubt was obvious in my voice. "What kind of deal?"


    "Try not to judge me too much," Riven said as if his major problem was the deal with a witch and not the fact that he was a murderous beast."I was a lot younger back then, and still naive. I had grown up believing that a girl from my town and I would be married, and grew cruel when she instead epted my best friend as her fianc¨¦." The way he told his background revealed that there was moreing. "There were rumours about a witch, just in the outskirts of our woods, and I became tired of watching them being happy, so I sought her out, hoping she could help me with my one wish."


    Then he chuckled, the sound sad and forced. "And oh, if only I''d known. The witch cursed me for my wish, iming that it was a punishment for my cruelty and selfishness, saying that she would bring out the true me so that I would have to face him every day."


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    "What did you wish for?" I asked, sensing how he''d tried to avoid those details.


    He looked down at his hands, shame washing over him. "I wished that she would fall out of love with my best friend so that I would have my love. And for my naive youth, cursed me with this." Now his hands were strained as he flexed his fingers, the frustration that must have been haunting him for years showing in his tense jaw and burning eyes.


    "But what does it have to do with me?" I asked, realising that I was a missing piece in his exnation. "Why didn''t you or he kill me like you did the rest." "Haven''t you figured it out?" Riven scoffed. "You are my promised love," The cursed boy said. "My mate."


    I could only stare at the boy in front of me, my head still working around the fact that he''d just revealed his curse some minutes ago.


    "You are cursed," I managed to get out, my eyes finally daring to meet his. "The witch cursed you."


    "She did," He agreed, his tone almost bored. "She cursed me for my wish, but she didn''t deny it. You are my love in this lifetime, and you are the beast''s love."


    I was out of the chair even before I had realised the decision had been made, causing it to fall back in a loud m.


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    "No." I protested loudly with the blood rushing to my face. "I''m not your love because I love another. And I was supposed to marry him in three days when you just took me away without my consent."


    Riven''s expression turned into something wild, beast-like, simr to the expression the werewolf had worn inside my house the night it took me, which felt like ages ago, but was as soon asst night. The reminder of Nathan sent me down a spiral of guilt. We were supposed to meet today. Thest pieces of the wedding were supposed toe together and then I''d just have to wait for two days before we finally belonged to each other. Did he know? Was he aware of the fact that I was missing? Or was he still hopefully waiting for me at the cottage in the hopes that I would show up as I''d promised?


    "I have a fianc¨¦," I choked out before collecting myself. "I have a fianc¨¦ and I''m not letting some curse that your selfishness caused change the fact that I am someone else''s, the same way he''s mine."


    I swore I could hear a growl in the bottom of his throat towards myst words.


    "Do you think I want this?" Riven asked, voice cold and low. "Do you think I wanted to be what I am today and live in this miserable ce for years only to have the lover I was promised hate me? I know what I know, and now you know it as well. We''re mates, and that is already foretold and sealed in stone."


    "Don''t call me your mate," I hissed. "I''m not yours."


    "No," A feral grin spread over his lips. "You''re not my mate. You''re the beast''s mate, the wolf'', the murderer''s. But you''re my destined love, and that is the end of this story."


    "I will never love you," I spat out, facing him with the same intensity that he gave me.


    "Suit yourself, hold on to your bitterness," Heughed mockingly. "But you are stuck here, and you need me to survive."


    "Need and want is not the same thing," I responded. "You might have forced me to this ce. But you''ll never be able to force me to love you. And that is my curse to you."

 Chapter 13: Stuck with a murderer

    I avoided him for the rest of the day and used the time to explore whatever was within the wall of mountains. It became clear rather quickly that he had been here for enough time to organise the area for the benefits of his own survival. He''d a crop field where I spotted a variation of seasonal vegetables growing, some even ripe enough to be picked for the day. Then there was the chicken coop in another end of the ce, where six living chickens walked around pecking at the ground andying eggs, as well as a rooster that gave me an aggressive side stare while I was watching them. If it weren''t for the fact that I was purposely ignoring Riven for the day, I would have asked him where he found chickens in a ce like this.


    Except for the main building that was his home (a stone buildingrger and grander than the Waby''s house but smaller than the average mansion that the rich would live in), there was a wooden barn nearby, one that seemed handmade with one single purpose, storage. The barn itself was rather impressive, considering the fact that he had done it himself, but I didn''t let myself dwell on the loneliness or effort that came with the project as I continued my exploring. There was a ce that was most easily described as a small forest as well, even if a closer description would probably be a field with growing trees that Riven probably used for wood when the house got too cold during the winter day. How he survived winters without crops and with a limited amount of wood was another mystery that formed in my mind, and for now, it seemed like the mystery would remain.


    I knew that I couldn''t avoid him forever because as much as it hurt my pride to admit it, I needed him to survive this ce, not only for food but also because the small caves that the mountains offer would guarantee death either of hyperthermia or of a disease. The house was the only one there was and a bed or a couch was a far morefortable option than the grass or stone ground. Besides, my stomach had started growling again since apparently the small meal I had before wasn''t enough to satisfy it considering everything that happenedst night.


    Last night...


    I wondered how my family was. The damages to the house had been critical, and my father had been thrown through a wall which must have led to a heavy injury. I didn''t even want to imagine what Varius was going through with our house destroyed, a sibling missing and a father that needed medical attention I knew we couldn''t afford. Perhaps Varius would ask his employees at the town''s guard for an early sry, but even that wasn''t enough to keep them safe until next month.Text content ? N?velDrama.Org.


    My mind continued wandering to Nathan. By now he definitely knew what had happened, and I could barely imagine what he must be going through. No one knew about us, and no one even knew that we knew each other so Nathan would have no one to talk to. In reversed roles, I think it would have driven me crazy to lose him and have everyone think that he meant nothing to me. The number of times I''ve had nightmares about the beast taking him was uncountable, and every morning when I woke up from those particr dreams, my instincts to kill the beast had burned brighter than the night before.


    Looking back at the house, I wondered if Riven was as untouchable as his werewolf form. Something told me that he wasn''t, but if I was wrong, I was dooming myself to a certain death. Still, I could not let go of the fact that this might be my only opportunity to fulfil what I promised myself those years ago. Perhaps I wouldn''t survive it, perhaps I would only toter die within these mountains because I hadn''t learned how to maintain this ce, but if killing him meant preventing the beast from taking more lives, isn''t my death worth it?


    Perhaps I could do it and survive? I mean, Riven survived for years in this ce alone and it is rather clear that he has the resources necessary.


    Speaking of the devil, Riven came out of the house with arge knife in his hand, startling me out of my thoughts. Our eyes met for a second and he gave me a nod to acknowledge my presence, I gave him nothing in return. Unfazed by my behaviour, he continued heading towards the barn I passed earlier and to my surprise, he came out carrying the body of a full-grown headless deer, the fresh blood still dripping on the green spot as he headed to his desired destination close to the river.


    I might hate the sight of him, but I was far too intrigued not to figure out what he was doing, and why, so I took a seat and leaned against the trunk of an oak tree while he sharpened his knife against the rocks that surrounded the end of the river. He started skinning the animal almost immediately, his technique a little rusty from where I was but it got the job done. His focus was on the deer and the deer only. While his hands worked as swiftly as he could, his jawline was tense with concentration and his eyes dutifully followed the movements of his hands. After a long while, he was halfway done and a part of me found pride in knowing that I could have done a better job skinning it with even less time, but I quickly pushed the thoughts away and continued watching him work until the skin waspletely off.


    When the first task had been done, he continued with the meat. He silently cut it up into reasonable pieces and collected all edible parts in arge bucket forter. I started asking internal questions about where the deer hade from when the answer suddenly hit me, the beast. Of course, it wanted its host body to be well nourished and fed, how else was it supposed to be able to use the body next month? Looking at the mountains, the werewolf''s strength was probably the only thing that could get us out of here without help from another but as Riven had mentioned, the beast only had its full potential during full moons.


    What I couldn''t wrap my head around was whether the beast was a part of him or another person entirely that shared a body with him. Because of the way Riven spoke, he talked as if the werewolf was one and he was another, but Riven had made the mistake of mentioning how the witch had said that she was taking out his true self, and that meant that he was him and the beast. If the truth was thetter, then there was no way that killing him would be an easy mission. But if it was the former... His human state would technically be just as vulnerable as any other human.


    The promise burned in my chest as I directed my eyes back at him, and every breath he took felt like a stab of betrayal against everyone that had fallen victim to his ws. Perhaps he had only been naive back then and was now suffering an unjust punishment, but it did not go over the fact that his survival meant at least twelve deaths every year. One life did not overrule the rest, and it is my destiny to stop the beast from its murderous rampage. But first, I need to learn how to survive, and I need to do it before the next full moon

 Chapter 14: A countdown to nothing

    Halfway through the month, we had both fallen into a routine that worked for both of us, or at least into a routine that worked with as littlemunication as possible. Riven clearly had things to do every day, from waking up in the early morning to collecting ingredients for the day''s meal such as eggs from the chickens and harvesting the ripe fruit from the field. Due to his early mornings, he''s always first to make breakfast, and irritatingly enough, he always makes sure to leave a te for me, even on the days I wake up before him he''s faster with his morning duties.


    Clothes and sleeping is another thing that had to be arranged when I finally decided to reenter the house after the first day. I had entered with gratefulness of the shielding from the cold wind only to see that Riven had already put a nket and a pillow on the long couch in the living room, as well as some lukewarm food on the table, the te containing mashed potatoes and a piece for grilled meat, as well as roasted paprika, and all I could think about was how unfair it was that he could cook something so satisfying for my taste buds while murdering innocent people every month.


    What surprised me however when Riven finally exited the bathroom with new clothes (hisst ones had been bloodied down) was that he threw himself on the couch without hesitation, burying his face in the pillow as he exhaustingly exhaled and rxed his muscles. I almost uttered my concern for him, and most of all, almost insisted that he should take the bed since it was his home after all, but then I remembered that I wasn''t supposed to talk to him, not even tolerate him. It had been hard to remember that when he''d been so rxed and unguarded with his light hair covering parts of his face while his longshes threw a shadow over his skin. During the sixteen days that had passed since, and I had found it harder and harder to remember that he was a beast, but every time I was reminded of it, the hatred only grew wilder and wilder.


    It wasn''t until day five that I finally caved in to all the questions I had for him. They had just been piling up since our paths parting, my curiosity oveing my bitterness every time I saw him do something that seemed a little out of ce, the first thing being when he buried the skin of the deer along with the bones instead of using it for warmth when necessary. When I had approached him to ask, his eyes had been wide with surprise over the fact that I was speaking to him, and it had even taken him another moment before he''d finally answered, exining that burying the skin and the bone was like an offering to the ce and the magic that kept his grains growing quicker than what they otherwise should and his chicken alive for eggs and meat when their live''ses to an end, but not until another generation is born to serve the same purpose.


    After that olive branch had been offered, it had been a little easier to get around things. I still avoided socialising with him, but I helped out in the house to an extent. For example, collecting vegetables while he collected the eggs, or checking the fish trap in the river while he chopped wood. It was strange how easily adapted to survival this ce was, always providing greens and fruit, always eggs to find the next morning, most times fish in the traps and no matter how many times I''d seen Riven chop wood, his forest didn''t grow any smaller. It didn''t take me a long time to realise that there was magic involved, and it was another thing I needed to learn in order to survive on my own in this ce.


    "How is this possible?" I had muttered under my breath once when I saw green in the ce where I had nted tomato seeds just the day before, and somehow Riven had heard it from where he was harvesting cucumbers. "Magic," Riven had replied as if it was obvious. "Most things here are magic, as long as we keep giving back."


    My eyes had met him that day, and I had to swallow down the insult I wanted to throw in his face.


    "Like the deerskin?" I had asked instead, and he had nodded.


    "The piece of wood I bury every time I chop down a tree as well. And the seeds and kernels that the fruits leave behind. Everything we can give back, we give back, and in return, we get food and fresh water from the river."


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    "So it''s like a trade?" I questioned and he nodded.


    "Since the traders can''t reach me here, nature has taken over the role. And it works, without a small carriage to limit the supply of course," He snickered, proud over his joke, I had rested the urge to roll his eyes. But what he didn''t know was that he had given me thest thing I needed to survive the ce on my own. Sure, it will take a lot of time before I get every offering exactly right but based on what I''ve seen him doing, it was nothing too difficult, I just need to remember that instead of throwing it all into the fire, I would collect them all and offer them back to the ground.


    On the neenth night of my stay in the house, I felt an itch crawling under my skin as I tried to sleep. The bed was morefortable than any other bed I''ve ever had the privilege to lie on, and theforter as well as the pillow was soft like a thousand clouds, but the problem wasn''t with anything physical, it was my mind that was driving me mad. I couldn''t get over the fact that the full moon was almost here and that if I waited too long, there would be another victim for the next month. The fact that I could hear him breathing as soon as I opened the door between the bedroom and the living room served as a continual reminder that I had permitted every breath he took. What was worse was probably the part of me that told me that he had done me no harm at all while I''d been here. If anything, he''s been more than a generous host considering how bitter my own attitude towards him had been. If he wasn''t the beast, then he would be the first human life I took, and the thought made me shiver.


    As if the world wanted to make my decision more difficult (or easier depending in how you viewed it) I had nightmares about my mother that night, about her scream, about how her body had looked like in the aftermath of it all. I had awoken by the sound of the crashing door, (the same way it was split to pieces the night I was taken), and I had run from the little shaft towards the house just to see that the beast was already gone, and my mother already dead. It was always that moment that haunted my dreams, the sight of my mother''s corpse and her scream as I was running towards her. The dream itself could always change, the location, what I was doing before, but I was always running towards her in the end, and I was always toote.This text is property of N?/velD/rama.Org.


    On the twentieth night, I stood over Riven with a knife in my hand, the darkness surrounding us both and only the sound of our breathing echoing between the walls. Still, I could see his form in the dark, the way his bare chest was moving with his breathing since he seemed to have disregarded his shirt on the floor and the peaceful expression he had as he slept. I had tightened my grip around the handle of the knife, fighting every ounce of doubt there was in my body with a focus on the evil deeds he had done. It is not human to trade a life for a life, but a life for many was something I couldn''t oversee. However, just as I was about to raise my right arm and aim for the heart, just as I was about to have steel meet flesh again, his hands shot and gripped my left wrist.


    "Don''t," Riven had murmured under his breath, not even opening his eyes. "It won''t work, he will not let you harm me and I would rather avoid whatever nasty scar he would give you in return."


    I remembered not being able to breathe as I felt his touch on my wrist, and had waited for him to rise and kill me on the spot. He hadn''t. He''d just shifted his position until he had his back towards me and gone back to sleep. I had never been more confused in my entire life.


    The next day he didn''t even mention it. He just continued doing his daily chores and continued leaving food on the table for me as if I hadn''t just tried to kill him just some hours before. It made me feel awful and I considered apologising to him but at the same time, I didn''t want us to talk about it at all, so I followed his lead and pretended as if nothing had happened.


    The morning of my twenty-fourth day here, there was a boy washed up on the edge of the river.

 Chapter 15: The boy

    I yelled out Riven''s name as soon as I saw that the new lump on the edge of the river was the body of a human, and in the process, I dropped the basket of vegetables as well. I ran up to the river, the soft grass against my feet and the sun too bright as my heart beat violently in my chest, hoping that however they were that they were okay, or at least alive. I sank to my knees as soon as I reached the body, taking who I realised was a boy by his armpits to drag him away from the cold river and the streams of fish that curiously swam around his feet.


    To my instant relief, the boy was breathing, even if the breaths were shallow and came with whistles from his protesting lungs. I ced my hand over his cold chest just to feel his heartbeat for a while, to make sure that it wasn''t going in a tempo that was too slow for his survival. When the moment had passed, I instantly started doing heartpressions. Not because his heart was too slow but because I could practically hear the water in his lungs as I breathed and I couldn''t remember what to do with a person who''d almost drowned but was still breathing and had a beating heart.


    Somewhere in the background, I recalled Riven yelling out my name as he approached, his hands hovering desperately over me and the stranger as if he wasn''t sure if an extra pair of hands would help or if it would only be distracting. Before my mind had the time to figure out what more I could do for the stranger, he woke up and violently started coughing up water, puking out what seemed like a mix of his food and the water from the river in a puddle next to himself. I carefully patted his back as he continued retching out whatever his body allowed him to, hoping to offer even the smallest hint offort if possible.


    Once he was emptied out, he fell back on his back and stared up at the sky with wide hazel orbs that revealed that he wasn''t really present. That''s when Riven took off his shirt.


    I couldn''t help but stare as I saw his toned pale stomach, muscles moving elegantly as the fabric was off his body. I had caught a glimpse of it when I had been standing over him with a knife, but the dark had covered up how eternal his body actually was. So now, here in direct sunlight, his body almost glistened in its glory, and the sight made my throat grow dry as my eyes just remained on his abs without even a hint of shame or reservation for his privacy.


    "Liliana," Riven said as he started manoeuvring the stranger''s body, and my cheeks flushed pink while I hoped that I hadn''t been caught, but Riven mentioned nothing of it if he did. "Help me get his shirt off him so that we can put him in something warmer."


    Almost immediately, my hands started moving and followed his direction, stripping the stranger of his wet cold shirt that stubbornly clung to his body as Riven held him upright against his chest. The stranger''s physic was nothing like Riven''s, but instead something closer to mine, narrow and starved, ribs slightly visible through the thinyer of dark skin that covered his body. Once the shirt was off, Riven handed me his own and helped me put his head and hands through the slightly warmer but certainly dryer piece of clothing. The boy was small inparison to Riven, younger too if I read his facial features right, at least within a year or two. This caused the shirt to hang loosely over his body, covering even part of his hips as the length was adjusted to someone far taller than him, but in this situation, the more coverage, the better.


    Riven heaved the boy''s unconscious body away from the grass and into his chest in a bridal style, and started walking towards the house without saying another word. It took me a moment before I followed him, the sight of his back muscles fascinating me as Riven continued carrying the boy without any signs of struggle or inconvenience, as if the weight of a boy was nothingpared to what he usually carried.


    I wonder if he kept the strength the world had in this form or if it was just the years of maintaining his ownnd and building barns that kept him fit.


    The stranger was gently ced on the bed as I started to rummage through the cabin of clothes which I had done a thousand times since I came here, searching for a pair of thick and warm pants for the stranger as Riven in the corner of my eyes pulled off the stranger''s own soaked ones. I handed him a pair I found eptable enough, while being careful not to see anything inappropriate and I could have sworn that I heard Riven chuckling behind me, and then the boy started coughing again.


    "Bring me some water and a bucket from the bottom cab to the left," Riven ordered me, tone now serious asmanding and for the first time since I came here, I didn''t protest against his words, just simply followed his instructions. Despite his direction, it was a little bit difficult to find the bucket he was referring to, but when I did, I hurried back into the bedroom, a ss of water in one hand and the bucket in another. When I reached them, I saw that the boy had gained consciousness again, and not the same out-of-mind state that he had previously but something that seemed more alive. He was sitting up, with the support of Riven behind his back, and obviously trying to stop his shaking as he stared down at his hands. Meanwhile, Riven was whisperingforting words into his ear, assuring him that everything would be okay and that he was safe and that he would feel better in a little while.


    I handed Riven the ss of water and put the bucket down on the bedside table before taking a seat in front of the boy, careful not to identally sit on his leg or other body parts. Without really thinking it through, I took his shaking hands in mine, and his gaze snapped up. From this angle, I could see that my suspicions about his age were correct. He was younger than us, and not only because of the way his flesh and skin hugged his facial bone structure but also because his eyes were raw and unguarded. He was afraid.


    "It''s okay," I said as gently as I could, cupping my hands around his to give him some warmth. "You''re safe."


    He looked at me as if he didn''t believe me, but he had rxed slightly in my touch so I continued to talk. "What is your name?"


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    He tried to answer, but it only came up as another coughing fit that we all patiently waited out, Riven once again patiently patting his back and I wasn''t sure if it was on purpose or if it was instinctively this time. Once the boy had calmed down, Riven handed him the ss of water, warning the younger one to drink it slowly in order to avoid throwing it all up again. And thankfully for us all, he listened, slowly gulping down the water and taking asional breaths between each swallow to satisfy his lungs before returning to the water ss, repeating the process until the ss was emptied.


    Meanwhile, I studied Riven''s face and noticed the troubled expression he had as he watched the young boy, eyes expressing something I could only detect as sorrow as he gently took the ss of the stranger''s hands, but I couldn''t really me him for the sadness, could I? This boy was young and afraid, and that was without knowing that he would be stuck here forever, with no way out that didn''t guarantee death. I grieved his freedom, the way I still grieved the loss of mine. Riven had been here for a longer time than both of usbined, so maybe he was past grieving his own, but somehow still grieved the little boy''s life.


    I made a mental note to ask him about itter. Not because I wanted to get to know him and his past more, but because it felt as if I owed him something after trying to kill me, especially since he had done no harm to me after finding out my intentions, yet at least.N?velDrama.Org: owner of this content.


    The boy sunk back against Riven, probably taking advantage of his body heat the way I was giving him mine, and sighed. When his eyes started to flutter shut, I could only imagine the exhaustion that overcame him after whatever the river had put him through, and when his breath started evening out, I thought that he was asleep, tucked away in a world where this was nothing more than a nightmare. I was about to rx myself when I heard him speak, his words slow and a little raspy due to his sensitive throat but still a whisper in the silence.


    "Theo," It came out as more of a sigh than a response. "My name is Theo."


    I looked over the boy''s shoulder to find Riven''s green eyes staring back at me.

 Chapter 16: To grow without freedom

    My days revolved around Theo after that, around him and his fragile tiny body and his scared confused eyes and his flinching instincts every time a drop of water unexpectedly touched his skin, reminding him of whatever trauma he''d gone through to have him end up here, an event he still hadn''t had the courage to tell us about. But it was okay, I kept his mind upied by teaching him what I''d recently been taught, where everythingy and what we needed to do every day to survive. He was a little slow at first, not really certain how to process his surroundings and most of all uncertain as to why we did it the way we did, until I subtly told him that this ce wasn''t like any other ce, trying my best not to reveal something that wasn''t mine to reveal.


    Riven, however, wasn''t making it easy to understand what I was and wasn''t allowed to tell me, mainly because he wasn''t even around to help. Almost as soon as Theo was back on his feet, eating, drinking and talking on his own, Riven kept his distance for no particr reason. At first, I thought he was mourning the boy''s freedom like me, especially when I caught him looking at us again and again. But his distance was something else entirely, he kept it out of spite, out of negativity I couldn''t read. He still cooked our food, and he still collected enough vegetables and meat for meals for three, but he never socialised, never said more than what was necessary and was always out of the room before anyone could even try to strike up a conversation with him. It was even worse behaviour than what I had given him during my first days, or more urately, it was exactly that behaviour I gave him during my first days here. But still, despite my attitude towards him, he still wasn''t as cold as he currently was towards Theo, and I couldn''t figure out why.


    Every time I saw the way Theo stared up at therge mountains, my heart ached. I had already told him that it was impossible for him to leave, had already told him that the mountains were too high to climb and survive and that the river was too strong and wild to swim in. He had then asked me if he was dead, if we were angels preparing him for the next step in his afterlife, or if this was his afterlife and there was no one here because he hadn''t been good enough for his ancestors to wee him. In return I had wrapped my arms around him and ced my chin on his head, not saying much exactly, but hoping that the gesture itself spokerger than anybinations of words ever could.


    He dozed off quickly that night, and it wasn''t until I had made sure that he was sound asleep that I tip-toed out of the bedroom, finding Riven by the kitchen sink with a ss of water on the counter and a book in his hands. Emotions washed over him as I approached him and violently took the book out of his hands. To his credit, he didn''t flinch when the book was ripped out of his grip, but his slightly widened eyes revealed that he hadn''t really expected that approach, even if he had been expecting an approach.


    "What is wrong with you?!" I hissed between my teeth.


    "You''ll have to rify," He responded as if he didn''t know exactly what I was talking about, and it only infuriated me further.


    "Why are you acting like a stuck-up brat?" I put my hands on my hips. "Theo needs both of us in order to get through whatever he''s going through now, and your cold shoulder surely isn''t helping."


    "He has you hasn''t he?" Riven leaned back on the counter and crossed his arm. "He doesn''t need two people ordering me around like a puppy."


    "Do I need to remind you that I know almost as little of this ce as he does?" I snapped back. "Most of the secrets here aren''t my secrets to tell, but you''re not around long enough to even greet him or ask him if he''s doing okay after he almost drowned."


    "Fine, tomorrow I''ll sing a good morning song to him and ask him if his health is at its finest," Riven threw up his hands in the air. "And when ites to the secrets, I don''t really care. Reveal all of them for him, telling him everything I''ve told him to see if I care. Heads up, I don''t."


    "This isn''t only about the secrets," I sighed frustratedly, desperately trying to reason with him. "Why are you avoiding him? What has he ever done to deserve your spit?"


    "He washed up on my shore," Riven was away from the counter and in front of me in two steps. "He washed up on my river and got stuck here."


    "That is hardly his fault," I protested.


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    "I know!" He defended almost immediately. "I know."


    "So why are you mad at him? Why does his presence bother you?"


    I couldn''t understand him anymore. I wasn''t even sure if this conversation was going anywhere, But I hated that I didn''t know the answer to why he resented the child. Not because there wasn''t a lot to resent by the sight of him alone. I could imagine a lot of reasons for Riven to hate him, such as his youth and innocent freedom, his childishness that might be a reminder of Riven''s own naive youthhood, or perhaps that his mate had taken more liking to the boy than she had taken to him. I looked at Theo and mourned his freedom, and perhaps Riven looked at Theo and hated the reminder of how long ago he had his own life outside of these mountains. The possibilities were endless, and that was why I needed Riven to tell me one, the truth. But he seemed pretty reluctant to any answers I tried to pry out of him as if we didn''t have another lifetime together stuck here all three of us.N?velDrama.Org: owner of this content.


    "Why do you care?!" Riven threw back.


    "Because I''ve just been hit with the realisation that I am stuck here, and that I will be stuck here for the rest of my life unless I kill myself or you kill me," Riven flinched back at the mention of this. "Because I''ve just realised that whatever we have going on within these mountains will forever only be about me, you and the boy that almost died and I hate it. I hate that I''m stuck with you. I hate that you''re alive and that you have doomed me to this. And most of all I hate the fact that his," I pointed towards the bedroom door where Theo was sleeping. "His life ended too soon and we are now both stuck with a monster. So now, with another life in line, I have to care, I have to care about him and I have to care about you enough for you not to consider leaving us both starved."


    "Maybe I''ll just starve you," He muttered under his breath.


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    "Perhaps, but I will not take my chances," I responded.


    "I am not a monster," Riven said, low and dangerous.


    "Yes, you are," I threw back and met his eyes without hesitation.


    His emerald eyes bore into mine and pinned me on the spot, his height adding to his advantage as he stared me down, but I did not fall back. When it had been only me and him, the only life I''d gambled with was my own, and I couldn''t do that to Theo, not after everything I''d promised him, not after all the times I''d told him that he would be okay. I had been prepared to die if it meant keeping the one thing Riven wanted away from him, his mate. But I couldn''t die now knowing that I left Theo''s life in the hands of a beast, a man that had done nothing to prove that he was gentle and soft-hearted. If anything, he''d only proved the opposite.


    I knew that Riven could strike me down if he wanted to, I would put up with a fight for sure but Riven would without hesitation be the one standing. Still, I refused to shy away from him and his hard gaze. I red back with the same amount of energy to stand my ground, and had no intention of breaking eye contact first. Riven must have sensed this, because he was the one who ended up taking a step back.


    "Do what you wish with the boy. Tell him what you want to tell him," Riven said, voice cold and somehow threatening. "But I should warn you, don''t get attached to him."

 Chapter 17: The longing for home

    The next day, Riven reminded me that the full moon was tonight.


    The hair on my neck rose when he casually told me it while he walked past me, and I almost grabbed his hand to yell at him for being so insensitive. The full moon was tonight, and Riven was still alive and impossible to kill, which meant that I had failed the one opportunity I had been given, which meant that another one was going to die tonight.


    I don''t know if Theo has sensed the shift in the atmosphere today, or if it was only my knowledge that caused me to hallucinate, but everything seemed out of ce. Riven skipped most of his chores today, to disappear into all types of ces, which shouldn''t even be possible since we are stuck with no way out. I noticed that the chickens weren''t as active as they usually were and nor were the crops as many.


    I was even the one who ended up making breakfast, lunch and dinner today, because Riven was nowhere to be seen and I didn''t trust Theo to handle the kitchen just yet. It was nothing too extra, but I still made sure to leave a te out for Riven in case he decided to show up, a mirrored gesture to all the times he''d left out food for me.


    I was hoping to catch him somewhere on his path, to talk to him about how this worked and what we were supposed to do. The beast as far as I know has only killed, and that was a policy that applied to everyone in his way, everyone except for me. I wanted to ask him if Theo and I were safe if we remained out of his way. Or if we should expect this to eb ourst night alive as well.


    I couldn''t get over the warning that Riven gave mest night.Published by N?v''elD/rama.Org.


    Theo knew nothing about Riven''s curse. By now I had told him about almost everything. About the magic that kept this ce alive, the chickens that didn''t age until there were others to take their ces, about the crops that grew twice as fast as they would have in any othernd and about the river that allowed fish to jump in but prevented them from getting out again. I told him about how this ce kept us alive. And when I was done, I told him about my own life, about the town where I had grown up and the strange traditions my family had every year that was invented as a distraction to hunger during one of our toughest years. He told me nothing about his own, and every time the conversation seemed to head that way, his face paled and his eyes widened in something best described as panic, so I avoided the topic, if only to ease his pain a little.


    With the possibility that this was ourst day in mind, I allowed Theo to do almost anything he wanted, from climbing the high trees to sneak eating the cherry tomatoes behind my back when he thought I didn''t notice and then freely running around the grass and just enjoy whatever life the mountains could offer. It was heartwarming to see that he had regained enough energy these past days to be a child again. He still avoided the river at all costs, but the rest of the ce was his own paradise to the extent where his imagination turned everything into magic. I mainly watched as he ran around, staying close by to keep himpany but rarely participating in the activities myself. A part of me wondered what I would be like to be a child again as I watched him swing from one branch to another. I was an active child myself and when we were younger, boys and girls yed alike, which might have been the best years of my life. But my longing for childnessess was not enough for me to take the step, so I remained watching on the ground.


    It wasn''t until the world started getting noticeably darker that I finally ushered Theo inside, exining that we would need to remain here tonight, and that he''d have to trust me. Inside, I did my best to keep him upied, but the house was not designed for the younger. We told stories and ate fruit, but even those activities could notst a lifetime.


    Riven''s te remained untouched on the table and I tried to ignore it, but Theo had other ns. "Where''s Riven?" Theo asked, brow furrowed and face frowning. "He hasn''t been around all day."


    Despite how distant Riven was towards Theo, the boy had still taken a liking to him, and would sometimes run up to him to thank him for the meal on days when Riven remained outside while we ate. The first time, Riven had been so caught off guard that he forgot that he was supposed to hate the boy, so he''d smiled and said that it was no problem. The other times, he''d only muttered a distant response and then told Theo to run back to me. But Theo was left unfazed by Riven''s attitude and continued sticking to his polite manners.


    "I don''t know," I replied, looking out the window where the dark had started to settle. "Don''t you worry about him tonight, okay? Just stay with me."


    Theo raised his brow but said nothing, he just returned to his wood carving and continued carving it until it looked like something suspiciously close to a rabbit, even if its nose was too misshapen and its ears were too big it was impressive for a boy his age.


    "You''re extremely talented at that!" Iplimented as I examined his work closer. "Just remember to only use the edge when we want these thinner and deeper carvings, it''ll give your rabbit more details and certainly make it more alive." Theo grinned at thepliment and did as I suggested, using the edge of the knife to carve whatever details he could remember from his past encounter with the small rabbits. The carving in my hand had the shape of a bird, a raven to be exact but my carving skills are not good enough for anyone to distinguish the animal''s specific species so it was just easier to say that it was a bird of some kind.


    That''s when we heard a growl from outside the house, and the hair on my neck rose as my entire body froze. Outside the window, the full moon was lighting up the ce like magic and whatever secret the dark held would be revealed tonight. The window itself was too narrow for any of us to see anything from where we sat, only when you came close to it did you have a full view over the ce in front of the house.


    Before I could stop him, Theo was out the door with his face pressed against the cold ss, his breath fogging up parts of the ss. I feared that he would let out a scream, revealing that whatever I suspected was on the other side of the ss was true, but when he didn''t I finally moved. I heaved up from the floor and stood behind him, peering over his little head to see what he was looking at.


    "It''s Riven," Theo said when I''d just spotted his tall silhouette. "I thought you said we needed to stay inside today?"


    I could not reply as I watched Riven suddenly bend over himself, one arm in the soft ground and the other around himself as he fell on his knees. Even from a distance, I could see the blood dripping from his side, and I clenched my jaw to stop myself from gasping when I realised how much it was.


    "His hurt," There was clear distress in Theo''s tone. "We have to help him!"


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    And before I could grab his hand and stop him, Theo had managed to slide under me and dart for the door. I ran after him and screamed his name, but he let his heart carry his feet, not his logic, so I had no chance of catching up with his healthy boyish energy.


    "Riven!" I heard Theo yell as he came closer to the bleeding boy. "Come inside, we can help you."


    The growl that Riven responded with caused every cell in my body to scream in horror.


    "Theo!" I tried again desperately, but the boy paid no mind to me, he only inched closer to Riven. "Riven?..."


    The sound of snapping bone caused Theo to stumble back, and when the beast turned violently, its talons dug into the boy''s chest, causing him to let out a high-pitched scream I knew I would never be able to forget.


    By now, Riven was no longer himself but instead the beast that Iid my eyes upon a month ago. He''d grown a head taller, and the wound on his side was no longer there, but it was unmistakably Riven''s body the beast had taken over, the traces of him revealing himself in the white fur that covered the body and the familiarity of the eyes that stared right at me.


    I threw myself over Theo before the beast even got the chance to think about it and covered his entire body with mine. If what Riven had said was true, and I was the werewolf''s mate and therefore it would not harm me, then it would leave me and Theo alone, since it would not be able to finish its job without hurting me in the process. It didn''t take long for the wolf to realise it, so it howled in the night before running off to the mountains, using its strength andrge size to climb the mountains and get over the edge.


    When he disappeared out of sight, I looked back at Theo who was gasping underneath me, blood painting his clothes red as his hands desperately clung into whatever he could hold on to.


    "Liliana," He managed to say my name between his rapid gasps. "It hurts."


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    "I know," I said as I felt the tears well over my eyes. "I know. I''m sorry."


    "It hurts, I want it to stop hurting," His pleas only broke my heart further.


    "I can''t.. I wish I..." Nothing seemed right to say. "You''ll be okay, Theo. You''ll find peace."


    "I should have listened to my mother," The boy was now sobbing in my arms, his entire body trembling as a result. "She... She warned me. She told me not to go too close to the river. I should have listened. I should have listened. I should have listened. I want to go home."


    By now he was just rambling with whatever strength he had left.


    "I want to go home. I have to apologise to her. I have to apologise to my brothers," Theo''s breaths were bing more and more shallow. "I just wanted to prove to them that I was as tough as them. That I was better. I have to..." He stopped mid-sentence.


    "Don''t bury me in the river, Liliana," He whispered. "I don''t want to drown forever."


    "I won''t," I promised and ced a kiss on his head. "I won''t."


    "Tell them I''m sorry. Tell them I''m..."


    And with that, Theo was dead.

 Chapter 18: The cries of the night

    I was still on the grass when the beast returned just as the sun was about to turn pink and orange and the birds were going to greet their morning with songs. There was blood glistening on his white fur, mainly around his ws but some around his mouth and jaw as well. If it was from the deer he dropped or from another one of his victims was impossible to tell, I just knew that there was blood, and that at least one had died tonight.


    I wept and sobbed as the night lingered over us both. I had begged for someone to send me a miracle, and when my prayers hadn''t been answered, there had been more tears rolling down my tears and cries so loud that it had frightened some of the night lives in the woods. None of it had mattered to me. His body had gone cold in the night, despite my best effort to keep him warm with my own body heat. The blood had also stopped flowing a long time ago, but the night breeze did nothing to cover the stench of iron that hit my nose every time I inhaled.


    Theo was dead, and I held his corpse as if it would disappear as soon as I let go. The tears had stopped a while ago, but the trembling and the silent sobs still remained intact as the only thing I could do. It felt as if the rest of me had died with him. I hadn''t known him for too long, but I hadn''t realised howfortable I had been in hispany until now when it was toote. Theo had made this ce seem like more than just a nightmare, and even if we were both here against our will, at least we had been here together.


    The sound of cracking bones could be heard from behind me and I knew that if I turned around, I would be greeted by the sight of Riven instead of the murderous beast, and I wasn''t sure if that was better or worse. "Liliana," He spoke so softly as if he''d thought that I would break. I could even feel the ghost of his hand on my shoulder.


    "Don''t," It came out more raspy than I expected. I shook off his hand and tightened my grip around Theo''s body. "Don''t you dare."


    "I tried to warn you," It came out as a plea. "I tried to warn you that this could happen."


    "What should I have done instead!" I turned my neck violently but regretted it as soon as my eyes met his, so I retreated back to burying my face in Theo''s hair.


    "What should I have done instead?" This time it came out as poison. "We can''t all turn off our emotions and leave the other to fetch for themselves. We can''t all be cold-blooded murderers."


    In my peripheral vision, I saw how Riven flinched at the usation, but not even that could give me the satisfaction of victory.


    "You killed him," I said instead. "He had already lost so much but managed to gain hope when you killed him."


    Just when I thought that I was out of tears, I felt them collecting on the bottom of my eye and spilling over in floods again. "Liliana, I..."


    "It should have been you!" I yelled this time, with no regard for anything around me. There was no point. "It should be your corpse we have to bury. It should be your youth we take away from you. It should be your death we celebrate but instead... Instead, I am mourning the loss of a friend. Instead, I''m cradling what was myst purpose in life. It should have been you and your curse and your horrible heart!"


    "Don''t you think I know that!" I had not expected Riven to yell back, but I was too exhausted to even flinch. "What do you think I''ve been doing the entire day, celebrating another transition? No, I spent the entire day trying to kill myself but HE. WOULDN''T. LET. ME."N?velDrama.Org: owner of this content.


    The truth was like a rain of acid, it burned the wounds that were already there.


    "Do you think I want to kill people every month? Do you think I want to take the life of everyone that dares toe near me?! Don''t you understand? I''ve been trying to kill myself for years! But nothing can hurt the beast. Not a fall from the mountains, not strong streams of the river, not an axe, not a gun, not a dagger, NOTHING! I am stuck being this... this thing that hurts everyone."


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    "But isn''t it a part of you?" I snapped back, finally facing Riven again only to see that there were tears streaming down his face as well, smearing out the faint blood on his chin and causing it to drip on the grass. His shoulders were tense and most of his pants ripped apart while his chest was bare and bloody. If it had been anyone else, I would have sympathised with him, but it wasn''t.


    "You said it yourself," I continued. "The witch amplified the worst parts of you."


    "The worst part of me isn''t that I''m a murderer," Riven threw back. "It is that I''m a taker. That I take, and take, and take, and take, and take without ever giving back. So she made me into this to make sure that I would continue to take, even when I don''t want to, there would always be something in my hands at the end of the night, another daughter, another son, another father or just another life. I would always take. And that was the worst of me." "And now?"


    "Now?" Riven chuckled frustrated. "Now I can''t stop. Now it''s no longer my choice anymore. Now I can''t even give back because what I take is irreversible."


    I looked back at Theo again. At his rxed expression, at his pale skin. He looked the same way he did the day we found him and I had hated the sight then and I hated the sight now. But this time, we couldn''t save Theo, no matter how much we wanted to, we couldn''t save him. I had sent prayers for his soul, and I had sent prayers to his family, but it didn''t erase the fact that he was gone from this world. It didn''t erase the fact that a boy, whose life had been too innocent and whose hopes had been for the young, had died before he ever got a chance to experience life. Because he cared, because he had been concerned about the one that now had his blood on his hands.


    "He came out to help you," I said, almost as a whisper. But Riven heard, he always did.


    "I know," Even his voice was raw with emotions right now.


    "It should have been you."


    "I know," Riven said again.


    "He didn''t deserve this," For the first time tonight, I lightened my grip around him.


    "I know."


    I sat there in silence, Theo''s bodyying over my legs and Riven watching me warily. The sun had made an appearance in the sky and the lives in the forest had started to wake up, unaware of the souls that were lost tonight. I hadn''t even allowed myself to think about who could have died in the vige today. I hadn''t allowed myself to wonder whose son or daughter they were burying, hadn''t allowed myself to ponder on which soul would join Theo''s in the afterlife, and I did not allow myself to start wondering that now. Not when I had a promise to fulfil, not when my duties weren''t over yet. I hadn''t been able to y the beast as I''d dreamt of a thousand times, but I would not fail Theo. I would not disrespect hisst wish and disappoint another soul tonight. I would not allow myself to wither when I still had onest thing to do.


    "I''m going to bury him," I said with no particr emotion involved.


    Riven hesitated before responding, and what left his mouth was something that should have surprised me more than it did. "I''ll show you the graveyard."

 Chapter 19: Xavier

    He took me to the forest I''d yet taken the time to explore, not because I haven''t had time but because I knew that the forest was the ce you were most likely to find Riven when he was gone, and I still tried my hardest to have unnecessary interactions. However, this time I followed him willingly. It had taken me a lot of time to calm down and gain enough energy to carry Theo''s lifeless body, especially since I had refused any help from Riven''s side. Meanwhile, Riven had taken out a shovel and a sharp screwdriver from the barns where he kept most things stored. The shovel was an obvious necessity for what we were about to do, but I didn''t understand what the screwdriver was for, nor did I have the energy to ask.


    The path to the forest was easy to spot as if someone had walked it a thousand times until it became a permanent imprint on the forest. Looking at Riven''s certainty, that was probably exactly what had happened. The forest in the de wasn''t big. One might lose another in it but it wouldn''t take long before they found each other or the end of the forest again and I couldn''t help but think that Theo''s imagination would have thrived in a ce like this, a ce where the trees grow too fast and their branches are always thick and healthy. I could still see before my eyes the way he climbed the smaller ones just some hours ago, and it pained me that it was hisst moment in another worldpletely. When we finally reached Riven''s wanted destination, I could see the side of a mountain cutting through the forest like a wall. In the middle of a less narrow ce, there was a tree with carvings on its stem, names I realised when I got closer, but Riven showed no regard to the tree and instead walked to something behind it. At first, I saw nothing, from my perspective it just seemed like he knelt on the ground, but that was when I spotted the cross made out of nks with a name carved into it.


    *Xavier*


    I almost jumped out of my skin when Riven started to speak.


    "Seems like you''re getting a friend today, Xavier," Riven said in a voice too soft for the current disy of his body where dirt, sweat and blood mixed together and stained his skin. "Take care of him, will you? At least until his family can take over."


    And then without further warning, Riven took the shovel and started digging a hole next to Xavier''s grave. I contemted helping him with the digging but there was only one shovel and my hands had been around Theo for so long that I wasn''t even sure if my muscles knew how to let go. So instead I sat and watched as Riven continued to dig, the sweat now dripping from his forehead and his back muscles moving smoothly with every pile of dirt he had to throw aside. I looked back at the names on the tree and counted at least a dozen of them. There were some male names and then there were some females. Some I even recognised but since there was only the first name that was carved in the people the names were referring to could have been literally anyone with that exact name. Then I looked back at Xavier and the cross that bore his name. It was a little worn down from being in a forest. Moss and sprouts of leaves grew on the bottom of it but otherwise, it was clear that someone had kept it in a good shape.


    When I looked back at Riven after a while, the hole was already as deep as to his waist and I would have been marvelled at his speed and strength if only the circumstances would have been different, but it wasn''t. This was a funeral, the most informal funeral ever with both guests covered in blood and one shirtless. Still, it was a funeral nheless because I wanted Theo''s soul to find rest as soon as possible, and that could only happen if we returned his body to the gods that take care of the soil.


    We ced the body down gently, and then each threw down some dirt at it before Riven returned to his shovelling, covering the pile with dirt again. Nothing was said out loud but I sent prayer after prayer for his soul, and just hoped that whatever existed on the other side would greet him with the kindest heart they could master. If Riven did the same, I did not know. His expression was unreadable as he worked and he''d barely spoken to me since we got here. Not that I med him. I had just wished death upon him instead, him and the beast inside him. Now, I wondered how unfair that was.


    The beast was a part of him, an amplification of himself, but the curse was the consequence of a witch''s magic. I''d started to understand now that even if Riven and the beast were the same unity, the change was in their prioritising of instincts. While Rivencked the strength to get out of here and instead used his energy to focus on surviving, the beast used his energy to follow his instincts, and like any wild predator, they have the desire to hunt. One part of me wondered if by understanding his situation, I''d started to ept it and that part of me was furious at me for letting him live, for being so close to him without feeling a strong sense of repulsion or hatred. This part of me shouted the names of the deceased - the names of those who''d been his victims; Mrs Morrigan Evermore, Mr Heimdenger, the entire Carvesson family, my mother and many more to remind of my promise, of the one goal I''d had since that night. I''d spent endless days and nights thinking about the fall of the beast, anticipating its death, training so that I was sure that I could take the final shot when the time came. All that time, only to realise that he was impossible to kill, and it felt like I was going mad,


    Another part of me was tired, tired of the bitterness, tired of the hatred, tired of spending almost a month alone when another person was right there. He was still a beast, he was still a murderer, the knowledge hadn''t slipped my mind but I was too exhausted to have to overthink everything just so that I could hate him and survive at the same time. I still did, sometimes when I thought about him I got nauseous with hatred, but I was also so tired of pretending that I wasn''t alone. Theo had helped for a bit, but after tonight, I was pretty sure that no matter how many people washed up from the river, none would be able to stay permanently.Belongs to (N)?vel/Drama.Org.


    "Do you want some?"


    In my absence of consciousness, Riven had managed to refill the hole that held Theo''s body and manifested a bottle of something I suspected was whiskey from out of nowhere. The screwdriver sat on the head of the grave as a temporary tombstone and I grimaced at the unprofessional sight of it.


    "I''ll make a cross for him as well," Riven said as he followed my gaze. "Just have to get some nks out here first."


    I nodded slowly.


    "Want some?" Riven asked again and held the container of liquor in front of me. When I silently declined he just shrugged and took arge gulp before putting it in one of the tree trunks, probably the same ce he''d taken it from in the first ce and in the back of my mind I recalled what a weird ce it was to store liquor, but I said nothing about that.


    "This has happened before," It was the first words I''d spoken in a while. "This. Theo, people getting into the de of the canyon or whatever."


    Riven said nothing at first, but then nodded.


    "All these names on the tree, do they belong to people you have killed?"


    Riven let out a dry chuckle. "No, those are the names of the people that have been here and then killed themselves trying to get out."


    "Why?" I asked, ignoring the dryness of my throat.


    "Because I told them the truth," Riven shrugged but then covered his face with his hands in frustration.


    "Because you told them that you were the beast."


    I wondered if some of these people were from my own town. People go missing every year. It seemed likely that at least one of them had somehow ended up here only to meet their demise by another force.


    "Yes," Riven responded. "Because I told them that I was a beast. That I was the monster behind the rumour that spread through these small towns like a forest fire. Most of them fled almost immediately, falling off a cliff or drowning themselves in the process. Others tried to kill me first, just like you, but ran when they realised the impossible."


    "What about Xavier?" I asked. "Was he the first?"


    "No," Riven sighed with a sad tone. "He wasn''t the first one in." Then he hesitated. "But he was the first one to stay."


    I had to process the words before I carefullyid out my next question.


    "What happened to him?"


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    Another dryugh erupted from his throat. "He was too close. I warned him that we sought blood but he was too close and once the blood had started to flow, there was no going back."


    "You killed him," I said, not as a question, but as a statement.


    "I killed him," Riven admitted.


    "You knew he would die today," I said then. "Theo. That''s why you warned me not to grow attached."


    "I did," Riven said. "And look how great it worked out." He paused. "We always go for the kill."


    I didn''t point out that he had referred to himself and the beast as *we* twice now.


    "But not when ites to me," I reminded him.


    "No," He agreed. "Because you carry a different curse. Because you are cursed to be destined with a beast, and behind all this bloodshed, the beast still wants you to love him." The trantion of those words burned into my consciousness.


    *I still want you to love me.*


    I looked back at the uneven spot on the ground where the soil had just been moved around and wondered when our curses would be lifted.

 Chapter 20: The deal

    Riven tapped up a hot bath for me once we got inside again, but even the warm soothing water couldn''t remove the feeling of absence from the night. I had barely been able to walk from the graveyard to the house, my legs started shaking as soon as I put a little too much weight on them and there were several times the corner of my vision started to darken, only for Riven to snap me back to life by regaining my focus. It was a miracle that I didn''t fall asleep in the bath and drown in the process, the oue wouldn''t have been so bad,


    Riven took a bath right after me, and meanwhile, Iid on the couch, giving my body all the rest I could offer. I was pretty sure that the bed would have been a better option but it was further away and the couch had aforting smell of moss and ocean salt so I stopped caring and just rxed my body into the cushions. Riven came to a halt when he saw me buried into the couch, but said nothing of it, instead, he just walked towards the room where most of his clothes were to rece the towel that currently hung around his waist, covering any improper part of him. Luckily for me, Riven had ced my clothes on the floor before leaving me to clean myself, so I had gotten the luxury of being able to drown in the soft and slightly too big clothes almost immediately after I''d dried off.


    "I''ll make something for us to eat," Riven announced when he entered again fully dressed. "I... I don''t really feel like going out there yet so I''ll just use whatever we have inside if that''s okay."


    I nodded as a response, and even if the gesture should have been hidden considering the fact that my face was buried into the couch, Riven seemed to understand because he said nothing more as he started working. Soon enough I could smell the scrambled eggs and hear how he rinsed off the vegetables, probably tomatoes, lettuce and cucumber if I remembered right, as well as something that sounded like someone was slicing through apples. My hunger and the scent of food kept my stomach growling and my senses awake despite my body wanting to do nothing but sleep, so I gave up the fight and sat up on the couch again.


    Riven''s back was turned towards me when I looked over at the kitchen and I could see the two tesing together, but I could also see that there was a third one that had been hastily put in the sink after he realised that there was no need for a third anymore. It was the proof I needed to know that Riven was as affected by this as I was, but that years and years of unwillingly taking has made him better at hiding behind his need for survival.


    "How long have you tried?" The question was out before I could even think it through.


    Riven''s shoulder got tense. "What?"


    There was no going back now. "How long have you tried to kill yourself?"


    Riven carefully put the tes down, probably to prevent himself from actually smashing one. He still hadn''t turned to face me, which was a little out of his character but I also recognised a person needing time to process when I saw one so I said nothing more. It took a while before he spoke again, but this time with his words carefullyid out, almost as if he was approaching a sensitive bomb instead of answering a question.


    "It got more frequent after Xavier," Riven''s voice was small and vulnerable. "But the first time was after the third visitor hung herself."


    The crashing emotion of guilt came over me and I had to look away to not bepletely overtaken by it. Since I''d arrived here, I''d seen Riven like some kind of viin who allowed the murders to happen for his own survival. I''d looked at the ce he built and the chores he''d perfected in a schedule and thought to myself that if I were in his situation, I wouldn''t have been able to live with myself. But I had thought that Riven was far too selfish to even consider the thought, when in reality, he''s been trying to stop the curse for months without any results. He was a boy who was forever cursed to take things he couldn''t return, just like he''d said.


    "I''m sorry," I said then and I saw the way Riven flinched in surprise. He had not expected my apology. Of course he hadn''t, the first time we sat down and he tried to exin himself, I had cursed him by promising him my hatred, and after that, I had done everything to keep him out of my space. As soon as this morning I had cursed him and everything he''d ever lived for, wishing death upon him and the beast inside him without much hesitation. I had shown him what I felt about him, and nowe to apologise, the sudden turn would have been too much even for me.


    "What?" He croaked out and tried to hide his obvious vulnerability. I wonder how long ago someone actually apologised to him.


    "You heard me," I said, not wanting to repeat my words again. "I fear that I might have judged you unfairly. Do not mistake this as total kindness, I still gave reasons to hate you, but I will admit that this was a little too hasty." "I don''t want your pity..." His response threw me off guard and he violently ced the te on the table in front of me.


    "What?" I said as I looked at the te and then at him.


    "I. Do. Not. Want. Your. Pity." This time his eyes finally met mine and I saw the burning with anger, and with hurt. "Only because you don''t feel like kicking a man that''s already down doesn''t mean you need to apologise to ''redeem'' yourself. So do not apologise for my sake."


    "Well then it''s not for your sake," I snapped back. "Then it''s for my own. Then this is my selfish attempt to have an understanding between us so that I don''t have to suffer this bitterness for the rest of my life."Belongs to (N)?vel/Drama.Org.


    "I have not been bit,ter towards you," Riven growled.


    "I know," I eximed furiously. "Trust me, it would have been easier if you were. But the beast is not even half of you is it? Its instinct bes stronger during full moons but otherwise, you tame its thirst." "Our thirst," Riven corrected me and I was not sure what he meant. "I told you, I was a taker and I still am. Now I just can''t control what I take anymore."


    "Isn''t there anything else?" I pleaded. "Isn''t there something it wants more than blood?"


    I realised the answer as soon as I said the words, and judging by Riven''s stiffness, he was thinking about the same thing. There was one thing they both wanted more than blood. My promise to myself was to y the beast and stop the murder to avenge my mother. When I''d failed the first, I thought I''d failedpletely, but now with the options in front of me, I realise that it might not need to be the case. I would break another promise to myself, but it could save lives, and when the dilemma was between one or many, one always seemed less significant.


    "And if it could have me?" The next words came out slowly and carefully. "If I gave myself to you, could you promise me that no one else gets hurt?"


    Riven stared at me with wide eyes.


    "You don''t know what you''re bargaining," He said atst, tone warningly. "It will not satisfy with only holding hands and conversations over tea. A bargain like this would give us permission to devour you whole."


    "I know," I said slowly.


    Riven thought for a moment.


    "You''re in shock,¡± He chuckled suddenly, almost relieved. "You''re in shock and that''s why you''re not thinking clearly."


    "No," I shook my head. "I am thinking clearly, and I don''t want more to die. Would it work? Will you stop the killing if you can take from me instead?"


    Riven growled low at the sound of it.


    "You have a fianc¨¦," Riven hissed. "Don''t think that I have forgotten."


    Nathan...


    Of course, I hadn''t forgotten him. He''d crossed my mind more times than I''d like to admit, and some days I still spent hours daydreaming about him finding me here and taking me home. But daydreams would remain daydreams, and I wasn''t even sure if he was alive. Who knows, perhaps he was tonight''s victim? I shuddered at the thought. Either way, this was the only way I could try to keep him safe. I am not getting out of her, the realisation dawned upon me days ago, but if my bargain meant that he would get to live, then perhaps it would be worth it all.


    "I will never see him again and we both know this," I said as neutral as I could. "Our chances died the moment I ended up here."


    "Great to know that I am a second choice," Riven muttered.


    "Listen," I demanded, fed up py his attitude. "If I''d gotten it my way I would have been married by now and you would have been dead. But none of that is happening, so I offer the best thing I cane up with here. I just need to know, will it work?" Riven scowled.


    "Yes," He responded harshly. "But you must know what you''re bargaining with."


    "I know what I''m giving up," I said determinedly. "You get me, and no more blood shall be shed."


    He studied my face closely, searching for something behind my eyes or on the expression I wore. Hesitation perhaps, or fear. But I did not falter. With every passing moment, I was more determined that this was the only choice I had. I could not live with another month of massacres. I could not live with another month of doing nothing. So instead I''d offered everything, and now it was up to Riven.


    "I will give you time to think this through," Riven said and based on my reaction, it was clear that that was not the response I was expecting.


    "So you ept?" I said, my throat was a little drier than I could recall.


    "You know that all I ever wanted was you," His voice was almost soft and longing, aplete change from the energy of this conversation, but then he collected himself. "But I give you until next morning to think this through, without my involvement."


    "I..."


    "I will not hear it," Riven interrupted me. "You make up your mind tomorrow and not a day sooner."


    And with that, he left the building, one te of food on the table untouched while the other was still staring directly at me from where it sat in front of me. I wondered if I''d made a huge mistake by offering this bargain. And I wondered how I could already have made up my mind.

 Chapter 21: To be devoured by the desperate

    When I woke up the next morning, my body was both exhausted and filled with anticipation at the same time. I finally had a goal again, a purpose to fulfil and even if the cost was great, it would be worth sparing the lives of whoever was left in the vige. If my sacrifice meant that children would finally have a chance at a future again, then it was a small price to pay. Still, I was grateful over the day that Riven had given me, not because I''d changed my mind, but because it gave me enough time to think everything through and process what I was about to give up.


    It also gave me a chance to mourn Nathan for real this time. Throughout the entire month, I''dpletely avoided the thought of him and everything I''d left behind. I had avoided the thoughts because I knew that it would only leave me in heartache, and because I knew that as soon as I started thinking about him, I would have to realise that our future was lost. When I finally allowed the emotions to rise, it was a lot more than I originally thought I would be. Despite already crying the entire night, I found more tears to cry for the future we''ll never get to have and for the first time in a month, I actually allowed them to flow this time. The tears were an end to my hope, and an end to an era where Nathan and I were supposed to be together. It had been painful, but it had also been what I needed to let him go. The bargain would keep him alive, and that was myst prayer to him.


    Somewhere during the process, I''d also turned my thoughts to Riven, and what this meant for him. He''d already told me that a lover was all he ever wanted, this entire mess is because he was in love with someone who didn''t belong to him and instead of pining in distance he got reckless and impulsive enough to search for a witch. He wanted this, I saw it in the way his eyes widened when I first presented the bargain, not only in surprise which I first thought, but also inplete disbelief. When a person spends too long longing for something, as Riven had, they rarely believe their senses when the thing they''ve longed for is presented right in front of them. They always look as vulnerable as a deer the first seconds before they start spewing out their scepticism in the form of words and denials, and Riven had been no exception.


    He''d kept his promise and kept a distance from me the entire day, doing his best not to change anything in his routine to affect my decision, but I still noticed some unconscious consequences of the bargain being on his mind. For example, the kitchen and living room was cleaner than I''d ever seen it, and instead of spending his days lost in the woods like usual, he harvested two times the usual amount and then I couldn''t help but notice that the body of the deer had already been taken care of even before midday. If he was stressing out because of the bargain or because of the fact that I could change my mind remains a mystery, but he had (without a doubt) only thought about that his entire day. Rising from the bed, I found myself hoping that the exhaustion in my bones would leave soon. My mind was off thinking about a refreshing breakfast when I suddenly came to a halt, spotting Riven sitting on the couch with his hands locked in front of him and shoulders almost up to his ears. Him being in his own home shouldn''t have surprised me, but at this time of the day he was usually out and halfway through his morning chores so his current presence caught me off guard. "Liliana," He almost flew out off the couch when he spotted me, but then hesitated. "I... Did you sleep well?"


    The fact that his nervousness was dripping off him made me more anxious than I''d first thought I''d be.


    "Not my best night," I responded honestly. "But that is not the question you wanted to ask me."


    If he was annoyed or grateful that I was so straightforward was unclear, but he nodded slowly.


    "No," He admitted, straightening his back and regaining his confident aura more and more. "But I do not wish to push you for an answer."


    "You said that I was going to make up my mind this morning and not a moment sooner," I reminded him and tried to y off my own nervousness as casually as I could. !"The morning has arrived and I have made up my mind." Riven just waited for me to continue.


    "My offer remains," I said slowly. "But you have to promise me that no more monthly huntings will ur if I give you this. I am doing this to save my vige, not for nothing."


    "I expected nothing else," Riven said, slowly inching closer to me. "And even if my beast side may have its mystery, there is one thing that hasn''t been more clear. There is no blood in the world that couldpare to you, not for me nor him." My breath hitched when he reached out to brush a lock of my hair from my face.


    "Then I''m yours," I whispered in the short distance between us,pletely ignoring how my heart was racing. "Then I am yours to take."


    He finally dared to ce his hand on my jaw, the touch soft and featherlight, and it ignited every blood cell in my veins.


    "Choose a word, any word, as long as it''s absurd and barely used."


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    I frowned at the request, but could not deny him it, nor could I stop staring into his emerald eyes.


    "Fuschia," I said, my mind drifting to the first time I saw the shade of pink with its absurd name.


    "Good," Riven nodded approvingly, his voice barely above a whisper but still filling the air. "Every time you want to stop, you say that and I''ll stop, no questions asked."


    I took a small step back in surprise, but it was not enough to break the tension between him and me.


    "You''re giving me a safeword?" I asked surprised, trying my best to ignore the soothing feeling of his tum brushing over my cheek. "I thought we agreed that I was yours to take? Your lover and all thates with that."


    "Being someone''s lover does not give them the right to do whatever they want to the other," Riven shook his head as if it was obvious, which it wasn''t too all, but should be. "I want you more than you can imagine Liliana, but what I want has a lot to do with what you like, and my desperation does not overshadow your boundaries. You will use the safeword the second you feel ufortable, and I will listen to yourmand and stop whatever I''m doing to wait for your instructions, whatever they might be. And this is not negotiable for me, it''s this or no deal at all."


    "The bargain is still on," I responded quickly,


    "And you''ll use the safeword?" His thumb hovered over the top of my lips. It still amazed me how he could make a conversation about safewords in our arrangement be so intimate, and it made me wonder what more talent he hid while another part of me was hating me for falling so fast into his trap of sweet words and soft touches.


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    "I promise," I said, knowing that it was the only way to keep him satisfied. "I promise I''ll use my safeword when needed and voice my opinion when I''m ufortable." "Good," And then his lips were on mine.


    When Nathan kissed me, my sense always got enhanced by the feeling of his lips on mine. My hearing caught sounds I otherwise wouldn''t have noticed and my body was always hyper-aware of the touches on my skin.


    But when Riven kissed me, I could not get a grip of anything except for the channelled desperation from his kiss. Everything else zeroed out into nothing, and I could not make sense of either the time, the touches or the sounds. It was just his soft lips against mine, and the silence. To no one''s surprise, I was the one to pull away first - my lung capacity nothing against his own - but he didn''t seem to mind. If anything he seemed to be caught up in his own astonishment. His eyes were wide and his grip on my jaw tightened slightly, as if to make sure that I was real.


    That was when I felt the edge of the bed against my calf. I hadn''t realised that we had moved while his lips had been on mine, but now I recognised the interior of the bedroom and the familiar sight of the garden that the single window offered.


    "Don''t fuck me today?" I asked him in honour of my recent promise. "I''m not sure if I want that yet."


    Riven nodded understandingly as he scanned my face. "But can I continue taking?"


    I gulped slowly but nodded once, and true to his words his lips returned to mine and suddenly my back was against the bed. He stayed away from the parts under my waist just like I''d requested, but it did not prevent him from devouring every part of the skin on the upper half of me that the toorge shirt revealed, leaving marks by sucking, biting and licking whatever inch of skin he could get his lips on, drawing small gasps from my lips every time he touched a sensitive spot and remaining there to hear more.


    Somewhere in the middle of it all, his touches that had been like igniting matches on my skin turned into somethingforting, something soothing, and I felt my exhaustion grip my consciousness as his touches became nothing more but a whisper in the back of my mind, the biting and touching slowly transitioning to soft kisses just as sleep hit at its fullest. Despite just waking up, I was grateful for the opportunity to sleep again. Meanwhile, my voice of reason couldn''t understand why his touches had felt so naturally on my skin, as if his kisses had always been meant to be there. But today exhaustion won over my constant need for answers, and I allowed my consciousness to slip off as I felt onest kiss on my forehead.N?velDrama.Org: owner of this content.

 Chapter 22: The guilt of affection

    Waking up for the second time today, I noticed that I was a little more rxed than the first time. As my most recent memories hit as a wave from the ocean, I couldn''t help but mentally scan my body to see if I was sore anywhere or if my muscles were unnaturally slow, but I found my muscles and my bones in their ordinary condition and released a breath of relief.


    Riven was nowhere in sight, but theforter gently ced over me was the sign that he had made sure that I wasfortable before leaving me to rest. I couldn''t stop over analysing the memories that yed before me. It had been so natural. It had been too easy to just allow Riven to touch me as he desired while my body rxed under his touch without any of the ufortableness that I''d been expecting, and it scared the hell out of me. No sane person would have adjusted to the bargain so easily. No sane person would in their right mind have allowed themselves to enjoy the tender touches that ignited my skin as Riven''s hands finally were allowed to touch. But no matter how much I wanted to lie to myself, I had enjoyed it, and I had beenfortable enough to fall asleep while he continued peppering kisses all over my skin.


    I wondered if my feeling was due to magic, due to the fact that ording to him, I was the love the witch had promised. The rules of his curse seem so abstract, but I know for sure that I didn''t want my own emotions to be altered by some witch''s spell. No matter how embarrassing the emotions might have been, I wanted them to be my own, and not the consequences of someone else''s. Parts of me considered asking Riven about this, whether he knew if my affection for him could be fake due to magic, but I couldn''t stand the thought of the expression that would ghost over his face as the realisation hit him, nor could I stand the thought of me being wrong and him knowing that I had enjoyed the touch of his hands on my skin.


    I hurried to the bathroom once I had managed to get out of bed, mainly hoping to postpone any interaction with Riven untilter. However, my eyes fell on the purple marks that covered my neck, corbone and shu¨®ulder when I finally looked in the mirror. And not just regr bruises but love bruises. Hickeys. And they were spread out on every revealed area of skin that Riven had been able to reach, some even merging together due to how closely they were to each other. It almost caused my breath to hitch when I inspected them closer.


    Nathan had never had the chance to mark me anywhere visible because it would destroy my family and his and everything we''d tried to protect by keeping us a secret. He had, however, left some in ces where only I was supposed to see them. Like the inside of my thigh or right above my hip.Published by N?v''elD/rama.Org.


    Riven had marked me as if he''d known that these ces had never been marked and he was repaying theck of experience by giving me everything and a little more, and I wasn''t really sure how to feel about it. I could just stare at them as I slowly counted the trail from one side of my shoulder over to the other. One thing was at least certain, no matter how I arranged my shirt, I wouldn''t be able to cover them all.


    With renewed energy and sudden curiosity, I started looking for Riven, and the most logical thing to do was to start outside. Riven had told me that the bargain was more than just some hand-holding and kisses here and there, and I now wondered what exactly he''d meant with more. When I first thought of this deal, I thought about him using me for sex, but after his talk about the safeword and how he''d been satisfied by only kissing me earlier today, I suspected that my previous thoughts were incorrect.


    Not too surprised, I found him by the river, but rather unlike him, he was just resting on his back this time, with the sun illuminating his skin and pale hair, while his eyes were closed and his lips were formed in a small smile. I did my best to approach slowly, but when he didn''t even jolt when I took a seat beside me I suspected that he already knew that I wasing.


    "Why theziness today?" I casually asked as if I wasn''t covered with evidence of what we''d done just previously.


    If anything, his smile grew a little wider.


    "I got most of it done like yesterday," He responded without opening his eyes. "Besides, the sun paid a visit today and it has been a while since it has been this warm in the de."


    I agreed with him that this was the warmest day in a while, not warm enough to be summer, but definitely a greeting of mid-spring.


    "How are you feeling?" Riven was suddenly up and eyeing me concerningly, and I couldn''t help but feel the hickeys burn in their exposure.


    "I..." I tried to find words but found nothing. "I..."


    "You... You can back out if it was too much," Riven''s tone was subtly sad as he spoke. "This is just the beginning of whatever we have going on and I''m not sure if I can handle you backing out when we''ve gone further." Despite appreciating his honesty, I felt my stomach clench at the words.


    "I don''t want to back out," I exined and something in Riven''s shoulders visibly rxed. "I just need a little time to adjust."


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    Which was a lie, my traitorous mind reminded me.


    Riven nodded understandingly before staring right ahead of him, suddenly a grin grew on his face.


    "They really suit you by the way."


    It took me a while to realise what he meant, and when I did, I threw a handful of grass towards him. He let out a burst of delightfulughter.


    "Hungry?" He didn''t even wait for my answer before getting up. "I have some fresh food ready for the day that needs a little marinating and seasoning before I grill them, would you mind joining me."


    I took the hand he had stretched out and allowed him to drag me up,pletely ignoring how perfectly my hands fit his.


    "I have one thing I need to do first," I announced but offered him a smile. "But I''ll join you shortly."


    His expression was understanding but he did not let go of my hand. Instead, he brought it to his lips and ced a gentle kiss on my knuckles, eyes never leaving my face as if to search for a reaction, and I just knew that my ears were red with emotions I rather avoid.


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    I gave myself a couple of minutes to collect myself and calm my violently beating heart before heading off to the woods, taking the path towards the edge of the graves where souls rested. Riven had already reced the screwdriver with a wooden cross, and I dragged my fingers over Theo''s carved-in name as I bent down to its level.


    "I''m sorry that I wasn''t fast enough to save you," I said as quietly as I could. "And I''m sorry if I''m in any way offending you." The guilt made my heart ache. "But I am hoping that there will be no more afterst time, and if I am the price that needs to be paid, then it is a small price."


    I kissed the tips of my fingers and ced them back on his name.


    "I hope your ancestors are taking good care of you."


    After that I left the grave, brushing off whatever tears had appeared during my visit and making sure that there were no traces of my emotions when I entered the house where Riven was preparing a delightful dinner for the evening.


    He didn''t need to know that I had visited Theo today. And he didn''t need to know that I wept again once I was alone in my room. But this time not for Theo, but because I was going to have to learn how to love the same thing that murdered my mother.


    I could sense her turning in her grave.

 Chapter 23: The sight of a god

    I woke up startled by a sound I couldn''t distinguish, until I heard it again.


    My name... Moaned through the door that kept the bedroom separate from the rest of the house. I thought I hallucinated it at first because it was so low, because it had barely been above a whisper, but then I heard it a third time, and as soon as the sound was processed in my mind, everything clicked. A warmth spread through my cheeks and up to my ears as silence took over again. He wasn''t loud, the door hid most of it, but every time he said my name there was like an echoing whisper. And I, who''d trained myself to be a light sleeper to catch any suspicious sound, had woken up immediately by it.


    I considered trying to go back to sleep again, but the knowledge that Riven was on the other side of the door, gasping and moaning my name made it impossible to eveny still despite thefort of the bed. The worst thing was probably the warmth that had gathered in my lower regions and the way I felt every breath I took and had to manually remind myself to continue if I didn''t want to pass out due tock of oxygen.


    This must be magic, I thought as I heard my name again and felt arousal seize hold of my senses. This must be the doing of magic because there was no way that I was so easily attracted to a boy I had to make a deal with in order to agree with. It must be the magic that enhanced the way my body sang at the thought of seeing him, at the thought of hearing him moaning out my name for real. Because if it wasn''t magic, then I would be a stranger to even myself. I was out of bed and on my way to open the door in seconds, and the sight that greeted me knocked the breath out of me.


    Riven was on his back on the couch with one hand on his dick and the other one loosely around his neck as he panted open-mouthed, eyes wide and transfixed on the ceiling. The pace he had was too slow to get him off, but clearly enough to keep him going, to have the desire burning in his eyes and to have pearls of sweat forming on his bare chest, and I could not, for the sake of my own survival, tear my eyes away from him and how eternal he seemed in the dim light of the night. I was stuck against the doorway, knees almost weak at the sight and ears just devouring the sound of every little gasp he made.


    When he shut his eyes I mourned the loss of his blown expression, but I quickly forgot it when he started to speak.


    "Enjoying the show?" The Riven that spoke was nothing like the boy who''d been resting on the grass. This one was hungrier. This one was wilder. This Riven was exactly the Riven I had expected him to be when he first told me that he was the beast, untamed and growling.


    "I..." Since when have I been so easily speechless?!


    Within seconds after my unfinished sentence, Riven was off the couch and had me with my back against my arm with each toned muscled arm on each side of my head and body barely inches from being pressed up against mine. I gulped when my eyes met his and when he heard it his grin only grew wider and his eyes glistened in mischief. Before I could even utter a word of protest or consent, he ducked his head into the croak of my neck, inhaling my scent so deeply that I almost thought that he could get high on it alone. Then his eyes were back on me, his pupils so blown wide that you could barely see the iris ring of green that hid behind it.


    "Listen closely," Riven whispered in the space between us. "You have two choices here. Either you go back into the room and close the door, so that I can finish my business with you only in my thoughts... Or you let me take you as I want tonight, It will be like a trade, you suck my dick off and I will make sure that my fingers curve to your satisfaction."


    Despite being offered a choice, it didn''t really feel like one at all. Not because he was restraining me in any way, but because I knew that I could not return from this, not when his eyes were looking at me as if I was the only thing worth a damn in this world and not when Riven was acting in a way that had every cell in my body sing in anticipation. Riven studied me closer and I knew that he had his answer when his expression got smug and one of his hands tangled in my hair just for him to pull my head to another side, giving ess to my still bruised neck in the process.


    "If only you knew," Riven''s voice was low and grumbling. "How great you smell right now."


    My breath hitched as his nose brushed over the skin on my corbone.


    "I can sense it you know," His other hand started trailing lower and lower until the rested on my hip. "Your arousal. I could smell it the second you opened that door and it drove me fucking crazy."


    A low huff ghosted over my skin.


    "Did you enjoy the show I put on for you?" My breath was quickening up as his body pressed me up against the wall. "Did you like the way my body was exposed for you to see and the sound of me panting in desire for you?" I didn''t need to say it out loud, but we both knew anyway.


    "I''ve been patient," He grabbed my jaw and forced my eyes onto his. "I have been so fucking patient. If you only knew what I wanted to do to you the second you woke up. But you hated me, which only fueled my desires more. You hated me, but now you''re mine to have."


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    He leaned towards my ear.


    "What''s your safeword?"


    I barely registered what he was saying so it took a while before I was able to respond.


    "Fuschia," It came out a lot breathier than I had intended, but Riven nodded approvingly nheless.


    "Good," He said slowly and it sent a thrill through my bones. "On your knees."


    Before I could process his words, his hands pushed me down until I was in eyesight with the bulge under his pants. His hand gently guided my face towards it until I could feel his hardness under the thin fabric against my cheek. I should have hated the situation I was in, on my knees, for a man that I didn''t choose myself, but that didn''t prevent how dry my throat had be due to wanting.


    "Look what you do to me," This time he guided my face to meet his. "I went so slow before because I wanted to continue imagining that it was you touching me, but now when I have you here, I don''t think I will be able tost."


    He pulled his dick out of his pants and licked my lips at the sight of it. It wasrge and red, pree already leaking from the tip of it from when he''d been touching himself earlier, but since it had been disregarded, it was now red in craving for attention.


    "Come on, Liliana," He cooed gently. "Take it."


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    I did not need to be told twice. In my eagerness to swallow it all, I almost choked as it hit the back of my throat, but I quickly collected myself and easily into afortable position and started working my mouth around it, the heaviness on my tongue grounding me slightly as I hollowed my cheeks. The sounds Riven made, it was even better than the whisperers I heard before. When allowed to, Riven was loud, taking every opportunity to moan my name or throw out a curse every time the pleasure washed over him, and if that wasn''t the perfect motivator to perform well, I didn''t know what was.


    I licked a long strip on the bottom of his cock before just taking in the head of it, dragging my tongue back and forth over his slit and earning a long series of moans that made my core bubble up in excitement. However, Riven must have gotten tired of me teasing him and forcing out beautiful sounds from his throat because his hands moved from my shoulders to my hair and he started a pace where he fucked my mouth deep enough to give him pleasure, but not deep enough to make me gag.


    "Liliana" He moaned my name and I looked up to see that his eyes were shut tight. "You don''t... You don''t understand how good you feel."Published by N?v''elD/rama.Org.


    I hummed in response and Riven moaned again. I couldn''t help but think that from this angle, he looked like a god.


    "You''re so pretty," I did not know how he managed to get out words between his heavy panting. "On your knees, you''re so pretty. I can''t wait to take you apart, I can''t wait to fuck you with my fingers and then hear you moan my name." How he was able to speak like a siren while falling apart was another thing I probably would never be able to understand, but I moaned while his cock was still in my mouth and he moaned in response. From there on, he returned his focus to fucking my mouth thoroughly and gasping my name the close to his climax that he came. The only warning I got for his release was a quick tap on my right cheek before the salty taste ofe erupted in my mouth, forcing me to swallow most of it but some still managed to escape in the corners of my mouth.


    He leaned over me with his hands pressed against the wall and all I could think of was how trapped I felt on my knees under his hovering body, and how strangely safe I felt knowing that it was just him. Slowly but determined, his hand


    grabbed my chin and guided me to my feet. At first look, I thought that he was going to kiss me and then call it a night, but then his expression indicated something else. My confusion must have been clear because he smiled amused all of the sudden and leaned closer to my face until it was mere inches between our lips.


    "You don''t think I''ve forgotten my promise, do you, Liliana?" His voice was low and slow.


    And then, my feet were off the ground.

 Chapter 24: Slow and Antagonising

    When my back hit the soft mattress the bed bounced slightly, but it did not prevent or slow down Riven as manoeuvred his body over me and straddled my hips. His chest was still bare and his pants hung lowly on his hips, exposing the v-line and the hair that disappeared under the fabric. I was still in the loose shirt I had gone to sleep with. That, and the pants that had to be heavily adjusted in order to fit me. However none of them seemed to sit right while Riven was over me, his lips roughly on mine and he continued to take, take, take.


    One of his hands travels lower and lower while the other is tangled with one of mine, his grip gently shifting from ck to tight depending on which sound he managed to draw out as his hand went under my shirt. I couldn''t help but wonder if this was payback for what I did back in the other room. The hand under my shirt trailed over my rips, slowly stopping at each bone that was distinguishable due tock of nutrition over the years but he touched them as if they were so much more than bones. Then his hand went up to one of my breasts, and he squeezed, earning a gasp from my lips which he swallowed in the kiss.


    "You''re so easy to admire," Riven said when he pulled away and this time allowed my gasp to echo as he continued massaging my breast. "You are so easy to touch." He had the faintest of smiles on his lips. "I haven''t even seen you yet but my hands have memorised the feeling of your skin and it feels like I could die with that memory alone."


    He inched close to my left ear as I continued to involuntary gasp and writhe under his touch, my exhalesing out as ragged and shaky because he wouldn''t stop enlightening every cell of my body.


    "You alone could drive me mad, Liliana," He whispered in my ear and then licked the edge of the earlobe. "You could take me apart if you wanted to." To my disappointment, his hand left my breast the feeling was quickly forgotten as I felt his hand travel lower and lower again.


    "You could take me apart," Riven said again and suddenly, his hand past the waistline of my pants. "But I will take you apart first."


    His hand was suddenly t over my cunt and my hips buckled into his touch. How he''d managed to spread my legs and get me into an effective position was beyond me, and I couldn''t care less about the practicalities of the entire situation once Riven started to massage my clit, using two fingers to create a slow motion that sent a spark of nerves up my spine. I was already wet, I had been since I saw him on the couch touching himself, but I had not felt so desperate until he''d finally touched me.


    "Today," He chuckled lowly as he studied me beneath him. "Today, I''ll only use my fingers, going at such a slow and antagonising pace that you''ll start to wish that you were a beggar."


    I moaned in response, barely focusing on anything except for the fact that I wanted him to keep going, keep ying with my clit until there I hit the high of my orgasm. He was already going antagonising slowly, riling me up with the right pressure just to retreat to softening softer once I got closer to where I wanted to be, just like he''d done to himself when he was touching his dick. I wasn''t sure if I wanted to know what his definition of slow was.


    "And once I have the first two fingers in you I''ll thrust and curve them until your moans are loud enough to wake the sleeping lives in the forest," I chuckled at the thought of how vocal he was in bed, but was quickly silenced when he edged one of his fingers closer to the opening of my vagina.N?velDrama.Org: owner of this content.


    "Riven," I moan, already losing the battle. He cursed under his breath and kissed my forehead before eyeing me again.


    "Say that again," Riven demanded, voice rogue and full of want. "Moan my name again."


    When I didn''tply immediately he pushed the tip of one finger inside me, his thumb reying the pressure on my hard clitoris..


    "Riven," I moaned again, arching my back in the process, demanding more.


    I hated how I loved this. I hated how he made me feel.


    I wanted more


    "Good girl," He responded and suddenly he had two fingers buried deep inside me, slick with my wetness as he thrust them in and out. Slowly, just like he''d said, antagonising slowly.


    What first started as low moans and gasps turned into full-out cries and groans when he curled his fingers to brush my G-spot just while his thumb still caressed my clitoris. I moaned and cursed his name every time he would retreat only to return to my most sensitive spots and do it all over again. My back remained in an arch, my hands were tangled in his hair as his mouth had started to create new bruises close to my breast while whispering dirty promises every time he could manage, as if his hands weren''t already on his way to overstimte me.


    "My fingers today," He sucked into the soft skin on my corbone. "My mouth next time," He slowly trailed up towards my jaw. "And my dick the time after that."


    His lips were back on mine again and I melted at thefortability of it. While he took and took every other part of me, I could at least take this. I forced my tongue through his lips and since he was caught off guard, I quickly gained dominance to explore his mouth. It was tough to do it while still gasping against his lips and with a body that had nothing in consideration except for its desire but I took what I could and earned wonderful sounds in the process, especially when I licked the roof of his mouth,


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    I had to fall back onto the pillows when I felt my core bubbling up, the thrust of Riven''s fingers thrusting into me until I could focus on nothing else but how close I was. His touches were burning and the way he curved his finger towards my stomach made me cry out in pleasure. In the distraction of the kiss, he''dpletely forgotten his promise of slow and antagonising, because now, his pace was fast and rough, chasing whatever pleasure he could bring me. I didn''tst long after that.


    I came with a cry, the orgasm hitting me with full force as my back arched on the bed and my vision whitened out into nothing. It took a while before the world returned to me and when it did, I just found Riven sitting there with his hand on his dick again, jerking himself off despite justing before this and moaning my name as stripes of pearly white soaked him and my clothes.


    The sight of myself made me make a double take, because, in the middle of it all, I''d lost no article of clothing. Riven''s pants hung on his knees and revealed his emptied-out cock but my shirt had remained on, and while the pants were significantly lower than where they''d first been, they still weren''tpletely off.


    "You didn''t take my clothes off," I frowned in confusion which caused Riven to chuckle.


    "No I didn''t," He agreed and let his hand brush over the side of my face. "That''ll have to be a surprise for me next time."


    He smirked smugly as he got off the bed and I couldn''t help the gulp I made at the thought of next time.

 Chapter 25 : The Past, The Present and The Future

    The next day, I actually sat down with him as we ate. I almost burst outughing at the way Riven froze when he realised that I was taking out a chair to take the seat on the opposite side of him. I smugly hid my smile by looking down at the te of food, fully aware that he was still staring at me with wary eyes as if I could disappear at any moment. It took him some time to realise how rude his staring was and when he did he gulped down the food he had in his mouth and resumed back to eating. But the silence onlysted that long.


    "What made you change your mind?"


    Even the uncertainty in his voice amused me.Belongs to (N)?vel/Drama.Org.


    "Come on," I rolled my eyes, not really sure what caused my joyful mood this morning. "I think that after tonight, we have the capacity to eat at the same table."


    Riven nodded slowly and then took another piece of the grilled fish before looking back at me again.


    "You seem different," He pointed out with his mouth half-full.


    "You," I waved around with my fork in front of his face. "Are in no position to talk about being different. I still can''t wrap my head around how dirty your mouth is." His entire face got red and he buried it in his hands. I let out a loud chuckle.


    "Honestly," I threw a pea at him. "How can you be self-conscious about it now when you had plenty of time to be self-conscious about it when it actually happened?" "It''s..." He started out slowly. "Different..."


    "Because you start thinking with your dick or..." I ducked when Riven threw a pea back at me.


    "I will not you."


    "Yet," I added because I was confident that I could pry out the answer from him.


    "Yet," He agreed because he was confident that I could pry out the answer from him. It felt like a small victory, but then his grin widened to the familiar form of yesterday. "But you can''t deny that you enjoyed it."


    Now it was my turn to blush and I couldn''t help but curse myself in my mind for starting a game I wasn''t sure if I wanted to y.


    "You have no proof," I snapped back in response.


    "The sounds you made are proof," He was definitely going back to his alter-ego (the one that wasn''t a murderous beast).


    "Maybe I''m a good actress," I shrugged and put a piece of carrot in my mouth to have something else to focus on rather than his amused eyes.


    "Oh, trust me," He said this, low and careful. "Those weren''t fake."


    To this, I just threw the entire fork in my hand, but he and his cursed werewolf reflexes caught without even blinking.


    "And I know for a fact," I could kill him for his smirk (or kiss it off) as he wouldn''t stop talking. "That you are extremely excited about the promises I made as well. Don''t you worry, I''ll make sure that everyone in town will hear you when you scream my name."


    I froze suddenly.


    "Don''t," I hissed between my teeth and Riven must have sensed the shift in energy because he backed down from where he''d been leaning towards me. "Don''t mention my life before this."


    Of course, I knew that the town still existed. Of course, I remembered that I had a life before this. But it was unreachable, and it was a long lost dream and despite doing this to save them, it was much easier to just pretend that I actually wanted this. It was easier to just pretend that Riven and I had chosen each other and fallen in love. It was easier to just pretend that we had chosen to move away from everything and everyone to just live our lives in this forest cottage with our own provisions. It was just easier to pretend that the life I had before this didn''t exist.


    "Liliana..." Riven''s voice was now soft and careful and I wanted to strangle him for it.


    "Don''t," The chair fell back as I rose. "I''m sorry but don''t."


    "You don''t even know what I''m about to say," Riven protested.


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    "It''s going to be some kind of apology," I snapped back and judging by Riven''s face, I knew I was right. "I don''t want your pity, and I definitely don''t want you to give some half-excuse about how we''re both stuck in here." Riven said nothing.


    "I just want to pretend that I could be happy here. That this is my choice and that I''m letting you touch me."


    "Isn''t this your choice?..." Riven was hesitant.


    "This is a bargain!" I shouted back. "This is a bargain where I sell my body to keep the ones I actually love safe."


    Riven flinched at the word "love" and I wondered how many had actually loved him as a boy. Perhaps, his parents, perhaps his siblings if he had any but his story was told in a way where no one had loved him, not enough to pick him first. Not his best friend and certainly not the love he had been in love with. When one cannot earn love, does one bargain for it as he''d done with the witch? Like he''d done with me? Has anyone ever loved him? I can''t, I already know that. I can feel affection for him, feel pity, but none of those was strong enough to oversee what he actually was, a beast who''d taken many, who''d taken my mother. I would never be able to love him


    "This. Was. Your Idea." The sound of his voice caught me off guard because he wasn''t calm and quiet, he wasn''t dominant and seductive, and he wasn''t broken and desperate. He was furious.


    And his eyes burned just the same.


    "Be mad at me and the world all you want," Riven was up from his seat as well, hand tightly gripping the edge of the table as he stared me down. "Pretend that you didn''t do this to yourself. But I won''t." There was a crash when his chair joined me on the floor as well.


    "Don''t think for a second that I enjoy knowing that all this isn''t for me but for you and your precious Nathan."


    "Don''t," I spat out as a warning.


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    "Don''t what? Remind you? Say his name?" Riven said mockingly. "If I have to be reminded every time that what I want is impossible, then you might as well feel the taste of it yourself."


    I could not reply, and it was not because of my dry throat.


    "You''re not the only martyr in the de," Riven spat. "So stop acting as if you''re the only one who has lost."


    He was about to storm out the door when I instinctively grabbed his arm. It got the effect I wanted, he stopped in his tracks, but I had not nned on reaching out and therefore not nned what to do next either. He did not look at me, and I did not know if that made it better or worse. Instead, I was stuck studying his ruffled white hair and his tense muscles flex under the same tension and nervousness that I was feeling by just looking at him.


    The worst thing was that I was the one wrong in the situation, not only because this entire time, I hadn''t asked him about his boundaries but because I knew enough about his past and him to know that this hurt him as much as it hurt me, if not even more. Time had not dulled his pain as it''d done with many, if anything, his loneliness seemed to have amplified it. I might have lost everything recently, but Riven had been left with nothing for a long time now.


    "I''m sorry," I whispered and hoped that he understood.


    He rxed under my touch and turned to face me and for the first time, it struck me how simr his eyes colour were to the colour of the forest, as if his soul belonged there. Maybe it did. I couldn''t imagine a version of Riven that belonged in the city, even without the beast, it urred to me that Riven would still thrive best surrounded by nature.


    When he didn''t respond, I desperately tried something else.


    "How about this," I started carefully. "You don''t mention my past and I don''t mention our bargain."


    Riven exhaled in a way I couldn''t read so I continued.


    "We forget this but not our agreement," And when he didn''t respond Iid myst card. "Please..."


    At the sound of my plea, he sighed heavily and closed his eyes. For a second I thought he was going to protest but instead he finally turned my way and ced a hand on my cheek, gently, just like he''d done before.


    "Okay," He breathed out, slowly studying my face. "May I?"


    I nodded once and then familiar his lips were on mine.

 Chapter 26: Close the distance

    He didn''t touch me for a week.


    Despite ending the conversation on what I thought were good terms, the energy between us shifted and he grew distant. At first, I cherished the distance, because it meant that he was the one not holding his end of the bargain, not me. But it wasn''t just the demanding touches that went missing, it was every type of understatement that we''d managed to build up this past month. He avoided talking to me at first as well, but that onlysted a few days before it developed into only strictly casual talks. Still, it wasn''t enough, I hadn''t realised how much I missed having a presence around me until he wasn''t there anymore and despite everything, I found myself missing him. But every time I tried to start a conversation, he gave me the shortest responses possible and then he turned away, and every time I reached out to touch him, international or unintentional, he flinched away as if my skin had burned him.


    If this was some kind of revenge for the first weeks I avoided him, I was already sick of it. But I knew that this wasn''t it, and every time he looked at me, he confirmed it as well. He always looked so fucking hurt, and I couldn''t understand why. I knew that I had said hurtful things when we argued but that was supposed to be behind us and we were supposed to be picking apples and harvesting tomatoes in the spring sun like every other pretend love couple. Instead, where I was, you found Riven on theplete opposite side, distance as far as possible. And if theck of human interaction wasn''t enough, the joint meals had be a real nightmare. With the strained tension between us, every bite was like a loaded weapon. We said next to nothing, and while I picked around with my fork, Riven heaved the food into his mouth and made sure to get out of there as soon as possible. And I would lie if I said that it didn''t hurt sometimes to watch him rush away from me.


    I gave him a week. A week to sort out his thoughts. A week to have his space. A week to do whatever he needed to do. But it had been a week by now and he still hadn''t given me any sign that we were on our way back to normal. If anything, my impatience made it seem like he was drifting away even further.


    I got tired of waiting in the end, and made up my mind to take care of matters myself, and if it led to another conflict, then so be it. I made the decision to strike moments after he''d left the dining table that afternoon, the timing was spontaneously chosen, but it was a practical choice, because any other time would have meant that I''d have to disturb him in the middle of a task.


    I found him by the forest, right at the edge where he always chopped wood for the cottage (of course he had to be by the lumber station, where else can he have easy ess to an axe). He was still setting everything up when I approached, moving one pile of cut wood pieces to one side to give room for the new batch he was about to chop. He froze in his step when he heard me, which ruled out any attempt of catching him off guard, but my steps did not falter. "Why are you avoiding me?" I put my hands on my hips as I studied him.


    "What are you talking about?" I didn''t need a werewolf''s hearing how strained his tone was. "I had dinner with you just some moments ago."


    I rolled my eyes.


    "Spare me the act," I scoffed. "You''ve been distant, and I want to know why."


    "Perhaps just a bad day," Riven shrugged as if it was nothing, as if my frustration was nothing.


    "Week," I corrected. "It has been a week."


    "You''ve... You''ve counted?"


    "Of course, that''s what you paid attention to," I threw my hand into the air. "Yes, I counted. Do you see anyone else around here I canin to about myck of fitting clothes?"


    The corner of Riven''s mouth twitched and I took it as the greatest victory.


    "Fine," He sighed. "I''ll stop ignoring you."


    "That''s great," I said but then paused. "But I still need to know what I did to bother you so that I can make up for it, or at least let me know if this has anything with me to do."


    Riven put down the log in his hands and leaned towards the closest tree, his mind clearly considering something. Whatever it was, I hoped that the next words that came out of his mouth would be some kind of truth, or at least a half- exnation.


    "I can''t figure out how to act around you," He finally admitted and his eyes kept me pierced on the spot.


    Why did I suddenly feel self-conscious when it was he who had a confession?


    "What?" I forced out and raised my brow for the illusion of being unbothered, but something told me that he saw right through it.


    "I can''t figure out how to act around you," Riven said again and shrugged this time as if it was a casual thing one talked about with anyone.


    "Why?..." I tilted my head with the hopes that the sentence would make sense. "Why can''t you just be yourself?"


    He chuckled lightly before responding.


    "Because I''m not sure how I would act either." This only made me more confused but I allowed him to continue. "On one side, I want to take over every part of you, as we said. But on the other, I want to shower you with gifts and kindness like a real gentleman would have done, to make the courtship seem a little more real."


    My heart skipped a beat at the word courtship.


    "Why can''t you do both?" I croaked out, hating how intrigued I was by both options of him.


    "Because you would get confused," Riven said as if it was obvious. "You''re confused about my situation already, I''m not sure if adding mixed signals would help your situation."


    "Oh..." I said slowly as I thought about what he said. He had been given mixed signals since the arrangement, and it had confused me at first. But anything was better than the silent treatment.


    "I don''t mind," I tried to sound as nonchnt as possible. "You can be demanding in bed and a sweetheart at dinner if that makes you feel more like yourself."


    "It''s not that simple," Riven pointed out and I rolled my eyes.


    "Then don''t make it any harder," I shrugged, longing back to our normal days. "Do as you want, I have a safeword after all."


    The reminder of our safety system made Riven snap his mouth shut, and I could see the gears turn in his head.


    "Let me stop your spiral of thoughts and make it easy for you," I said to interrupt his thinking. "What do you want to do now?"


    When he didn''t respond at first, I feared that I had been too pushy, but when his eyes then started scanning my body something told me that I had given him exactly what he needed.


    "I want," He said slowly and I could already sense on the tone which instinct he acted upon this time. "I want to do what I promised youst time."


    I felt how the skin on my arms turned into goosebumps as he somehow inched closer without even moving from the tree, or perhaps it was I who had taken a step.


    "And what was your promise again?" I couldn''t help but smile when I saw how surprised Riven was at my response.


    We were almost pressed against each other now, his back against the tree and my body against him with only the tiniest of distance that kept us separated. His breath was hot against my skin, and his eyes kept flickering between my eyes and my lips. The worst thing was that despite being on the edge of a forest that should have dominated all of our smelling senses, I could still distinguish the scent of him underneath it all, and it made me slightly insane.


    "I promised to use my mouth," He rasped in the distance between us and my smile grew wider.


    "Then what are you waiting for?"


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    He closed the gap between us as soon as the words were out.


    His hands roamed my body so instinctively that I wondered if he was making up for lost time, but in the end, one always ended up in my hair and the other one around my waist pulling me closer and closer. While his hands were distracted with my body, my tongue roamed the inside of his mouth and I swallowed every gasp he gave me. We were like that for a while until I pulled away as far as his tight grip allowed me just to look at him, at his wide dark pupils and the flush on his cheeks.


    "Are we doing it here?" He asked between gasps and I marvelled over the fact that a boy that could do almost anything with his impressive strength, was so easily breathless by a little arousal.


    "Well, not many that can walk onto us here can they?" I snickered and he threw his head back in the most beautifulughter.Published by N?v''elD/rama.Org.


    We both easily manoeuvred our positions until my back was against my soft grass and his body was over me like a warming nket. On the ground, he kissed me again and slowly moved down to my jaw and corbone where most of his bruises had already disappeared. But it was clear that Riven wasn''t going to allow the ce to stay clear. He got so low as to the edge of my clothes again, but instead of stopping likest time, he looked back up at me.


    "What do you think about losing the clothing you''veined so much about?" Riven asked teaseingly as he tugged at the bottom of my shirt.


    I shouldn''t have enjoyed the thought as much as I was. A more appropriate reaction to the suggestion would have been a little self-consciousness about my own body but Riven was already eyeing me so hungrily that I wasn''t sure if I would have been able to deny his request even if I wanted to. However, I wasn''t going to make it easy for him.


    "Really?" Iughed as his face returned to my level. "You couldn''t have done it while we did this inside but now when we''re on the grass you feel like it''s appropriate?"


    My teasing tone only seemed to amuse him further.


    "Well," He said slowly and mischievously. "Not many that can walk onto us here can they?"


    The clothes were quickly ripped off after that, leaving mepletely naked and him shirtless but the shape of his hard dick was visible under his dark pants.


    He wasted no time worshipping my body, whether it was by kissing every reachable inch of it or caressing it with his hand or mouthing how beautiful I was against my skin and at every touch and every praise, I gasped and arched my back to press further into his roaming hand and soft lips. By the time his lips were on my nipple while the other was yed with by his finger, I was moaning and squirming under his touch, only more encouraged by how aroused he seemed to be every time I realised an involuntary whimper. And when he finally moved his mouth and tongue to my cunt, I knew that it wouldn''t take much for him to take me apart this time.


    I cried out when his tongue pressed into my body and moved my hips for more until he had to hold me down in order to keep me still. He licked and sucked and put his mouth to good use as he had promised, and I wondered if this was the way I was going to die, naked with soft grass under my back while on the urge of begging to him to never stop (we haven''t gotten there, yet).


    I tugged violently in Riven''s hair when I came, and he didn''t even give it a second thought before he licked that clean as well.

 Chapter 27: In sickness and health

    It seemed like the universe hated it every time things were going my way. Things had finally resolved itself and Riven and I got along a little better than before. It was easier to understand him now when the truth had beenid out and as days went by, I also got a hang of his sudden shifting moods. It had turned into a game, guessing what he was going to do next, trying to interpret the mood he was in by studying his movements andnguage. But most of the time he still managed to catch me off guard and that made every touch a little more thrilling than thest. But that was when the season shift decided to spread its sickness, causing me to one morning with a runny nose and sore throat for the exact wrong reasons.


    I tried to disregard my aching muscles and go on with my day as if everything wasn''t more difficult than usual. Being sick has always been something I''ve hated because it always caused so much trouble. When I was sick back home, I would push myself for as long as I could, until the sickness let loose or until I couldn''t move anymore due to the aching of my muscles. But I didn''t need to do that here, still, the restlessness was a bigger enemy than the exhaustion so I was out despite sneezing every other second.


    To my mercy, Riven was as out as he always was early in the mornings. I had gotten used to being thest one out of bed despite growing up as the early riser in the family. It gave me time to do things before I had to stand out with his nagging, because Riven would definitely not agree with my choices of being up.


    However, for my own sake, I picked out the easier chores today, such as picking ripe fruit and collecting some mushrooms from the forest. When I had walked past Riven from where he was collecting honey, we both greeted each other with warm "good morning''s and then both returned to our task, Riven not noticing my red face thanks to the distance.


    I got through the potatoes and the cabbage before I had to sit down to catch my breath. It had taken me almost double the time it was supposed to do, and I started wondering if the cold indeed was something more serious. I shivered at the possibility, and because a cold breeze just brushed past me. Thankfully the sun was at least out today so there was somefort in its warmth at least. I closed my eyes for a moment and salvaged the sunlight on my skin. Summer had always been my favourite season due to the possibilities it offered, but spring was a close second. Especially when the sun was out and everything around me smelled like fresh grass and flowers.


    The sound of approaching footsteps made me aware of Riven''s presence when he took a seat somewhere to my right. I heard his amused chuckle when I turned to him without opening my eyes, but turned back to the sky without another word.


    "You''ve only been awake for about two hours," Rivens amused tone brought me back to consciousness when I was about to slip away.


    "Well, it was two exhausting hours," I muttered as I turned to lie on my stomach with my hands under my head.


    Riven shifted beside me, and I could see through my eyelids how his shadow hovered over me.


    "Are you alright?" Riven asked and I tensed in surprise when I felt his hand on my back, but rxed immediately after the shock.


    I hummed happily when his hand started massaging my muscles, unknowingly helping me with my ache as a result.


    "Liliana?" I could hear the concern in his voice when I started to drift away again. His hand rested on my forehead and I pressed into the chill of his hand. "You''re hot."


    A grin spread on my lips. "Thank you, I think you told me that someday ago."


    His hands stopped in his movements but returned to their task before I had the time to miss it.


    "I think you''re sick," Riven said as he touched my cheek this time.


    "It''s just a cold," I said. Nothing a little sleep can''t cure."


    "You''ve already slept, dear," I couldn''t help smiling at the nickname. "This isn''t something sleep can solve."


    I groaned in response when he started poking at my cheek.Text content ? N?velDrama.Org.


    "Come on, let''s get you inside." Riven urged and tried to turn me to my back.


    "Are you going to go mother hen me?" I asked and squinted when the sun was back in my eyes.


    Riven rolled his eyes but the corners of his mouth were turned upwards. "I''m going to bury you, that''s what I''m going to do."


    "In nkets," I chuckled.


    "Yes, to suffocate you."


    I grinned wider. "You''re going to bury me in nkets and feed my soup," I said mockingly with the nest doe eyes I could muster.


    "Collect yourself, Liliana," Rivenughed. "You''re ridiculous."


    And I couldn''t help the warmth that spread when I heard himugh quietly again.


    He did mother hen me for the rest of the day, despite my protest and the fact that he clearly had other things to do. True to his word, he pulled out every nket he could find and threw it over me where he''d forced me on the bed. And then he used the cabbage and the tomatoes I had left behind to make a soup along with a cup of honey tea on the side. Thebination of the two together was atrocious, but they did wonders to my freezing body.


    It was confirmed that it was the flu when I ran as fast as I could to throw up in the bathroom.I had not eaten enough for it to be much, but I heaved out the little soup I''d just managed to get down. Riven was by my side in an instant, keeping my hair away from my face and giving me a ss of water to rinse out the disgusting taste that dominated my mouth.


    Everything went downhill from there.


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    I could not eat or drink anything without throwing it up again and my body shook so violently that Riven refused to let me go anywhere on my own, despite me telling him that I had done it before. That only seemed to concern him further and behind the sound of my violent coughing I could swear that I heard him muttering something about not taking care of myself.


    "You need to stop hovering over me as a hawk," I croaked out from under the nkets.


    "If I could be certain that you wouldn''t leave this bed the second I let you out of sight I would," Riven pointed out and returned to his book. It was a ssic I''ve heard many praises about but never read myself.


    "I can barely move as Iy, getting off this bed will be near impossible," I just finished my sentence as a cough got stuck in my throat.


    "Do you need help switching positions?" He asked concerned as he put down the book.


    "Nah," I buried myself deeper into the nkets. "I''mfortable."


    Then when a moment passed I let out a low chuckle.


    "What?" Riven asked and tilted his head.


    "Nothing," I muttered and suffocated myughter in the soft fabric.


    "Are you?" Riven hesitated but then continued. "Are you being delirious?"


    There was silence for a moment and then I giggled. GIGGLED.


    "Are you fucking giggling?"


    "No," I lied and hid my face again.


    "Okay," Riven was clearly amused. "This is a sign that you should be sleeping."


    "I''m trying to, but every time I do even the slightest movements, you ask me if I''m okay," I pointed out and threw a pillow that didn''t get as far as intended.


    Rivenughed his adorableugh again and I should have been offended that he''dughed more times today than he''d done any other day. But it was such a heartwarming feeling in contrast to the misery that I kept quiet. "I almost want to keep you like this," He admitted. "Cuddly and giggling."


    I red at him.


    "You can''t me me," He shrugged. "You''re cute like this. Every other time you''re too busy trying to be a strong independent woman to even allow yourself to giggle."


    "Hey!" I eximed defensively. "One can be a strong independent woman and still giggle."


    Riven chuckled at my response.


    "Sure one can," He rose from the chair and sat down next to me. And I turned to be able to face him easier.


    It hit me that if he had been one of my loved ones, I would have snaked my arms around his waist and pulled him down to keep him there. Not only for warmth, but because I''d never allowed myself to be vulnerable around anyone, so it would have been nice to just rely on someone else for a change. Nathan never saw me sick because I never went to the cottage when I was. It was an extra trip that was unnecessary when I needed to save my energy to be able to provide for my family.


    But here...


    Here, I wasn''t a necessary resource for our survival. Riven had managed just fine without me. So I was allowed to be buried in nkets and I was allowed to rest without having to feel guilt over leaving someone to fend for their own. It just would have been nice to be able to share this time with a loved one.


    I must have been drifting to sleep because I could only vaguely process Riven shifting around my nkets. Then there was the ghostly feeling of a kiss on my forehead before his baritone voice soothingly clinged in my ear. "Sleep dear," He said softly. "Let me take care of you for once."


    I sighed in bliss and fell asleep.

 Chapter 28: Acceptance

    Miraculously enough, I felt a lot better the day after. It shouldn''t have been the case and I knew that but based on what I already knew about this ce, things work a little differently than in the outer world. Riven still wouldn''t let me exhaust myself however. It took a while to convince him that I was okay and steady enough to help out around the de but even then he only sent me to do the easiest tasks.


    "Come on," Iined once I was finished with my second round of apple picking. "There is surely something else I can do. The apples won''t go bad today."N?velDrama.Org: owner of this content.


    "You should be happy that I''m not tying you down on the bed," Riven said but stopped when he realised what he''d just said. However, the damage was done.


    "Maybe you should," I purred and he threw me an unimpressed re. "Or I can do it to you if you prefer it that way."


    If Riven had had anything in his mouth, he would have choked on it and suffocated. Instead, I had to be satisfied with watching his breath stop in his throat before he violently started coughing. "Enjoyed that thought, didn''t you?" I grinned as he calmed down.


    "You are a spawn of the devil," Riven responded with a raspy tone and I threw my head back tough.


    "Take care of your words, Riven," I said. "Who knows, the sickness might get you as well."


    This time it was he who chuckled amused.


    "I don''t get sick, dear," Riven responded. "Immune."


    I gaped at him.


    "That is hardly fair," I eximed and looked at him. "How does that fit in?!"


    "Sensitive senses and super strength," Riven reminded me. "You didn''t think my immune system would be hyper as well?"


    "So you''ve never been sick?" I questioned and tilted my head.


    "Not since my first transformation," Riven confirmed and returned back to the fish trap. "I must admit, however, that seeing you sick really reminded me of how miserable it is."


    "Why thank you," I said ironically. "It was."


    A beat of silence passed before Riven spoke up again.


    "About the other thing," He started out slowly. "I think I would love to be the one restrained."


    It took me a moment to realise what exactly he was referring to and when I realised, a blush spread through my face and caused me to go all red. Riven, the asshole,ughed amused when he saw how flustered I was.


    The worst thing was the image that filled my vision the moment I allowed myself to think about it. Him, naked and tied up, panting and moaning my name while under my mercy. After what I had heard the first few times, I was certain that his voice while begging would be intoxicating. I had not even seen himpletely naked yet, but I had seen enough to know that he was beautiful under his clothes and the thought of him under my control made my throat dry for a reason that wasn''t the illness.


    "You better remove those thoughts from your head," I violently twisted my neck when turning towards him.


    "I can smell your arousal on you," Riven said, too proud for his own good. "And believe me when I say that I would have loved to fulfil your fantasies, but you''re sick, so you''ll need to wait."


    "I don''t know what you''re talking about," I denied, the glow still on my cheeks as I cursed his senses.


    "Don''t act shy on me now, Liliana," Riven chuckled. "Besides, it was you who brought it up.''


    99


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    "As a joke," I reminded him. "I didn''t think you would actually agree."


    "Oh," He said slowly. "So you weren''t thinking of me tied up and unable to move so that you could do anything to me."


    It actually scared me how urate his descriptions were and I wonder if heightened senses also meant reading minds.


    "You are a horrible person," I muttered under my breath with no heat, and then a moment passed. "I think some restraining would do you some good, maybe teach you some manners." Even without hyper werewolf senses, I noticed that Riven stopped breathing.


    "Who knew," He said slowly, testing out the words. "That you were freaky."


    I threw one of the apples from the basket at his face and he flinched away at the impact.


    "Watch your mouth," I warned.


    "What?" He eximed delightfully. "I would never have guessed. I thought you were more of a gentle and intimate kind."


    I didn''t give him the satisfaction of a response.


    "Don''t worry," He said then with his back towards me. "I like that you aren''t."


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    If my jaw had dropped before, it was unretrievable now.


    "Dear gods, you are freaky!" I used with a pointed finger.


    "I have unfortunatelyckedpany to really know," His grin grew wider with every word he said. "But I do see the appeal."


    "I think I''m going to be sick," I said, covering my face to fake a gag when I in reality actually hid my blush.


    "Oh please tell me if you are," Riven responded. "I would love to hear you giggle again."


    Another apple went flying his way, but this time it missed his face due to poor aiming.


    "Hey, quit throwing those!" Riven protested.


    "Then quit being an asshole," I snapped back.


    Riven took the apple from the ground and tossed it into the basket with movements of pure elegance. I watched him move and wondered when hispany became so easy to be around. It wasn''t always. There were days when all I saw in him was the blood on his hands, the blood of my mother, the blood of my old teacher, the blood of the people in my town. But now, I looked at him and saw a boy who was robbed of choices way too soon. He''d been wrong to want to steal another''s happiness, but he should not be forced to steal for the rest of his life. He''d learned his lesson. He''d grown gentle. He shouldn''t be punished anymore.


    In the back of my mind, I could feel my ancestors disapproving of my affection for him. But I couldn''t hate him anymore. He''d done unforgivable things but I couldn''t hate him when I knew what I knew now. It wasn''t fair to him. And it wasn''t fair to me either. I hoped that my mother didn''t hate me. I hoped that she would look down on me and recognise my decision as kindness and not an act of betrayal. But in any case, I knew that I couldn''t just hate him anymore. "Hey," Riven''s voice cut through sharp with concern. "Is everything alright?"


    I gave him my best smile, and this time, no part of it was forced.


    "Yeah," I replied. "Everything is fine."

 Chapter 29: With the moon closing in

    Touching him got a little more natural after the eptance step. It was so natural that it was almost an unintentional desire to have him around me all the time. I suspected that it was my mind''s way of keeping me from going insane due tock of human interactions, but a deeper part of me had foundfort in having Riven around, and I couldn''t shake that feeling. Riven, unlike the first times, reacted like every touch was a gift sent from the angels. So many emotions would pass through his eyes by me simply putting my hand on his back, from surprise, to wonder and then something softer, something indescribable. When I first noticed it, I was overwhelmed by my own emotions. But since then, I''ve intentionally made sure to give him the softest touches I could give him just to bring out those feelings again. To slowly clue him in on the fact that I was starting to ept him.


    We both moved around each other like we''d been born into it by now,munication barely even necessary when we both already knew what to do to make this work. He handled the wood chopping and the fish traps as well as the bee houses in the corner. Meanwhile I took care of the fruits and vegetables that needed to be picked for the day, and the chickens when they wanted to cooperate.


    Riven makes the food while I prepare the firece for warmth during the night.


    Riven sets the table while I tap up the water we have cleansed for today''s meal.


    Riven takes the dishes and I set the house in order for the night.


    Riven takes the couch and I take the bed.


    It had be so natural for us to understand each other now that I noticed immediately when something was wrong with Riven. It was not that he grew distant likest time. No, this was something else entirely. The first sign that something was wrong was that he zoned out more than usual. For example when he did the dishes or chopped wood by himself. I would sometimes just watch his body mechanically move while his mind was elsewhere. The more obvious sign that something was wrong was when I managed to scare him for the first time. He always knows where he has me, no matter the situation, no matter how quiet I try to be. The logical exnation to it is his senses of course, the fact that he can hear and smell things even from an inhuman distance. But once during our make out sessions, when his dick was in my hand and his mouth was on my neck he had confessed that I always stood out from the rest of the world. He had said that while he might sometimes hear the deers on the other side of the wall of mountains, the feeling of my presence always overshadowed the rest. It wasn''t even my scents or my sound, he''d exined while sucking my nipples and drawing gasps from deep within my throat, it was just me. So when he jumped and almost dropped a te after I carefullyid my hands on his shoulder I knew that something was bothering him. And afterst time, I was convinced thatmunication worked better for us than everything else.


    "Riven," I approached the subject softly as he set down the final te. Still, based on the tensions on his shoulders, it was clear that he knew where this was heading. "What''s bothering you?"


    He turns around slowly to face me, and I can see how he considers telling me a lie. But I hope for both our sakes that he disregards that thought immediately. To spare both time and feelings. He doesn''t lie to me.


    But he doesn''t tell me the truth either.


    Instead he sighs and looks out of the window where the light of the moon has reced the sun in illuminating the ce. The full moon has been inching closer and closer for each passing day and I''ve noticed how Riven sometimes stares out of the window when the sky is clear and the moon is bright in the sky. Still, I don''t think the full moon is what this is about. But I could be wrong...


    "Riven..." I sigh his name in exhaustion and reach for him.


    Suddenly his lips are on mine.


    This isn''t like the other times. This isn''t what he usually kisses like. Sure, once we''ve settled into the mood Riven grows hungrier and hungrier for every passing second, but he always starts slow. He always makes sure that I am on the same page as he was. It doesn''t always have to be in words, but it is spoken in the way he softly cradles my neck and angles my face so that he can reach me more naturally. It is spoken in the way his hands always hover above my back like a featherlight touch until he is sure that I want this too.


    But not this time.


    This time his lips are desperate against mine and the arm around my waist presses me tight against him. The hand on my jaw is tight and demanding, keeping me in ce so that he can take, take, take. It takes a solid minute before he''s off my lips and on my ear instead.


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    "I want you to ride me" He whispers and I shiver against the drop of his voice. "I want to be tied up against the bed, unable to move while you can do whatever you want to me, to my body. I want to forget my name but remember yours and onlye when you allow me to. Liliana, I want you to take me."N?velDrama.Org: owner of this content.


    It takes me some moments before I regain enough strength to push him back.


    "Riven stop," I hiss and despite not using my safeword he backs off and seems to realise what he''s done.


    "Liliana..." He starts off horrified but I stop him with a shake of my hands.


    "I want all that," I say as I take his hands in mine. "But this isn''t that. And as appealing the sight might be, I can''t do anything with you until you tell me what''s really bothering you." Riven hesitates but then sighs in defeat.


    It''ll be a full moon soon," Riven avoids my eyes as he talks. "And I can''t stop thinking about what the beast will do to you now when he finally has you."


    "Wha..."


    Just a heads up: NovelDrama.Org is the only ce to read theplete version of this book for free. Don''t miss out on the next chapter-visit us now and continue your journey! "When we are transformed, we act only on instinct," Riven exins. "And I don''t know what that means for you when the time finallyes."


    What he''s referring to finally settles in my mind and I stop breathing for a while. Of course I had known that sleeping with Riven wouldn''t just be sleeping with Riven in this form, but in his other form as well. And I have had a taste of his desperation, I''ve had more than a taste of his yearning and his want so what will it feel like when I get a taste of it again but this time with a heightened senses in y. Every touch, every nce, every thought Riven sent my way are so emotionally packed that I can''t even imagine what that type of want would do to a creature that''s based on pure instincts. His own emotions were almost too much to handle (in the best ways possible), and I almost suspected that more would tear me apart. Still, I can''t find myself wanting to back down, not from Riven, and certainly not from the beast. They''d always called me impulsive and hotheaded anyway.


    "And I know we can''t control it," Riven continues his frustrated rambling. "But I want it to be me as me the first time we do it. Not me as half anything else. Just me and you."


    I put down his hands once he finishes and move my own up to his face where I cup each side of it until he''s protected within my grasp. His eyes are wild and burning with fury, not at me but at the conflict between what he wants and what he needs. The fire in his eyes curses the world for not letting him have anything pure. However, behind that fury, there''s a glimpse of that wanting he forced to the kiss earlier, and I find myself burning with the same desire.


    This time, I ced my lips on his first, but he wasted no time responding to it. This was more simr. This was more Riven. This wasn''t just his years and years of desperation, this was something far better. And despite enjoying every piece of desperation Riven reveals to me, nothing can pass the feeling of Riven kissing as he needs it more than breathing. Nothing can pass the feeling of him chasing whatever I am willing to give him because he knows that he can never get enough of it.


    It makes me feel wanted.


    It makes me feel powerful.


    I move my lips from his lips to his ear, just as he''d done before, and whisper slowly.


    "Find an eptable piece of rope, and a blindfold," Riven''s eyes snap to mine when he hears thest word and I can''t help but grin. "What? You always brag about your werewolf senses and how you can feel me every time I approach. Let''s see how great those senses really are. And how patient you can be."

 Chapter 30: Take, take, take

    Since the conversation, I had imagined Riven tied up uncountable times. I had imagined him tugging at the restraints, knowing fully well that he could break them but wouldn''t because he didn''t want to. I had imagined him under my mercy as I took his cock in my mouth again and sucked until he was moaning my name again, like the times before. In my head, he had been gorgeous and the thought of me being able to do what I wanted was thrilling. But never, never would I have been able to guess that he would look like this.


    As soon as I gave him themand, he had scurried away to find whatever he needed. Due to my patience, it had seemed like an unnecessarily long time. But now when I had him where I wanted, I realised that he hadn''t even hesitated as he''d ripped open one of the cupboards, which meant that he knew exactly where to look because he had prepared. And the thought of that made my blood sing in pleasure. And now, under my touch, I realised that not even a thousand years of fantasising would have been made justice for the sight in front of me. Riven with his arms tied to the head of the bed and legs tied to the end of it to minimise movements made things to my heart that should be considered a health hazard. And in addition to that, this was the first time I''d seen Rivenpletely naked. Undressing him had been enough to make my knees weak. Naked and exposed in front of me made him not only look gorgeous, which I already knew that he was, but like a god. A god who had everything exposed, except for his eyes. At first, I mourned the fact that I couldn''t look into the enchanting green that was his eyes, but the fact that he had lost his sight under the soft ck cloth meant that all his other senses were heightened and sensitive, and it gave a result I hadn''t even dared to begin to imagine.


    He was already panting and twisting under my touch, and I had barely even started. It felt like it would take me a thousand years before I was satisfied with processing the sight of him, and even a thousand more to just feel his soft skin under my fingers. He had scars all over his body, some I''d noticed before but mistaken as a birthmark while others that had been better hidden seemed to glow against his skin. A particrly big one was a long striped scar that went from one side of his back to the hip, but the one that particrly made me feel from him was the scar right above his heart. The reminder of what he had revealed the night of his first transformation was like an echo in the back of my head, and I could only silence it by cing a kiss right on the scar.


    "Liliana..." He sighed under my touch, finallyying perfectly still after a long while of writhing under my gentle hand.


    I ced another kiss on his body, this time on the scar on his right shoulder, and hey panting with an open mouth as I took my time, kissing scar after scar, taking minute after minute until I had reached his left ear where I brushed my lips over the shell of his ear and whispered:


    "I''ll take you apart," His breath hitched at my words. "I''ll take you apart and you''ll justy here and take it, whatever I decide to give you."


    "Whatever you decide to give me," Riven repeated with a sigh and his obedience made my stomach flip, but it did not make me break the act.


    "You''ll not move until I say so," I continued and felt Riven go perfectly still. "You will note until I allow you. And you''ll follow my every direction, right?"


    "Yes," He groaned when I moved down to his neck again.


    "Good," I hummed and studied his facial expression. "Now I need you to listen carefully. I will not stop when you ask me to. And I will not give you everything you beg for. However, you''ll get to pick one word, one safeword."


    "I don''t," Riven stopped when he felt my hand travel down his side. "I don''t need..."


    "This is not up for debate," I snapped, but then kissed his shoulder softly. "One word."


    "Oh okay," He said a little out of breath. My grin at the sound of it was a feral thing. "Onion."


    I could help but snort as I heard his word,pletely dropping my character in the process.


    "Really?" I breathed out. "Onion."


    "I tried to think of something else," Riven admitted, a little embarrassed but still with a small smile on his lips. "But every word that crossed my mind was definitely something you would have been able to turn into a sexy thing if you really wanted to. So I needed something out of ce."


    "Well, I can assure you," I said as I returned to where I''d been hovering above him. "Even if onion wasn''t your safeword, randomly saying onion would definitely have killed the mood."


    A mischievous grin grew on his lips as his face turned to where I was.


    "Is that a challenge?"


    "No," I growled and then pressed my lips against his, robbing him of any witty response he would havee up with.


    The kiss was desperate and feral, and I channelled every emotion I could master into my lips. Riven, who had been caught off guard, gasped into the kiss and allowed my tongue to smoothly slide in and start its exploration. However, when Riven regained his control he started kissing me back and battling my tongue for dominance.


    "No," I said as I pulled away. "Youy down and let me take this."


    "Liliana..." He whined and I could see how he shut his eyes even further under the dark cloth.


    "Don''t make me punish you," Riven stopped breathing. "You would rather have a reward, wouldn''t you?"


    Riven didn''t even hesitate before he responded.


    "Yes," It came out as a breath. "Fuck yes, please let me have a..."


    "Then let me do this," I interrupted him and kissed him again. This time, Riven fought against every urge to kiss me back as he justid on his back with his mouth open for me to take. Returning to what I''d previously done, I dragged my tongue over his teeth and to the roof of his mouth as he groaned into the kiss, his cock hardening where it was pressed against my thigh.


    Once satisfied with his mouth, I started moving downwards to the rest of his body, touching ces I''d touched before and ces that were mine for the first time. Returning the favour by leaving bruises and marks wherever I find it fitting. My reward for this is the fact that I can feel his muscles moving as he''s fighting the instinct to move, to press further into my touch. We''re still just at the point where he releases small gasps and groans here and there, but I can feel how we''re closing into a louder Riven. A Riven I am honestly looking forward to.


    "You''re such a good boy," I say between kisses and I can swear that I hear him whimper. "Staying still, wanting to please me. It''s just that simple, isn''t it? You just want to be good."


    Riven groans at the sound of my words and I take it as a sign to continue.


    "You''ve been good," I ce an open-mouthed kiss over his hip bone. "Tell me, what do you want?"


    "You," He immediately gasps out. "Whatever you''ll give me."


    "Oh," I say amused and ce a kiss on the other side of his hip. "That is dangerous territory. And what will you give me in return?"


    "Whatever," He groans as I ce a kiss just above his cock. "You can take whatever you want."


    I hum satisfied as I brush my nose over his hard cock and he moans.


    "You should be careful what you wish for," I say before taking as much of his cock as I can in my mouth and hollowing my cheek.


    Beneath me, Riven cries in pleasure as his hips thrust into my mouth. But I am just as quick off him as I was on him.


    "I didn''t tell you to do that," I reminded him and he whimpered, again. The sound alone could be the death of me.


    "I''m sorry," He pleas desperately. "I... I just."


    He doesn''t get to finish his apology before I sank my teeth into the soft skin of his hips. Riven almost screams out in pleasure and surprise at the sensation of it and I lick over the mark of my teeth before turning my eyes to his face again. It is no longer just small gasps and groans, we''ve reached where he desperately controls his breathing in order not to suffocate while he still fights the instinct to move, parts of his skin red with the effort. I search for any sign that I''ve gone too far but am instead just greeted with the realisation that he enjoyed it. He enjoyed it so much that his cock has now hardenedpletely, and is dripping pree on his stomach.


    "Liliana," Riven moans as I lick the length of his cock. "Please..."


    The sound of his begging makes my brain shortcut for a moment.


    "Please what?" I say, doing my best to hide how affected I was by this.


    "Please," He gasps again when I suck the tip of his cock.


    "You have to be more specific," I tease as I drag my finger up and down the inside of his cock. "How else will I know what you mean?"


    Riven growls impatiently but caves in when I lick his cock again.


    "Please ride me!" He almost screams out in the sensation. "Please, let me be inside you. Please let mee!"


    And who am I to deny such pretty words?


    I ce my knees on each side of his hips and line myself up with the hardness of his cock. Riven must feel that the head of his cock is touching the opening of my vagina because he grips the bed sheets as if his life depends on it and digs his heels into the bed to stop himself from thrusting upwards.


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    I sink down on him slowly, to give myself time to adjust but also to hear the moan Riven releases. I am moaning his name as well as the filling sensation of his cock inside me takes over everything else. It was not the first time for me, but never had I ever felt so full as I did right now, and the fact that we hadn''t prepped before this made the sting of his size painful, but in the best way possible.


    "Fuck, Riven," I groan when I''m finally seated. "You feel so good. You''re sorge."


    Riven groans at the praise.


    "You''re so tight, Liliana,¡± He gasps when I slowly start rocking my hips. "You''re so tight and your moans... Your moans will be the death of me."Belongs to (N)?vel/Drama.Org.


    Just to make a point, I moan his name a little louder than before and he throws his head back in pleasure.


    "You feel so good, Liliana," He starts tugging at his restraints but I am too far gone to even care. "Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. You have no idea what you''re doing to me right now. You have no idea what I... Shit shit shit. Liliana, I''m gonnae." I bounce on his cock a little more determined than before and his word turns inaudible.


    "I''m gonna," He stops in a moan. "I''m going toe. Please. Please. Please. Let mee. Let mee. Let mee, Liliana!"


    I don''t miss a beat as I whisper the words he''s begging for.


    "Thene."


    As if themand was all he needed, hees with a cry of my name on his lips and I feel him filling up inside of me. I throw my head back in pleasure and allow my hand to travel to my clit so that I can start massaging it at the same speed I''m rocking his softening cock. It doesn''t take me long to chase my own orgasm ande with his cock still inside of me and his name on my lips.


    It takes us both a long moment before wee down from the high of our orgasms. When reality starts to make sense again I start taking off his restraint, one by one, leaving the blindfold on untilst.


    When it''s finally off, however, I am greeted by the beautiful sight of his eyes, sparkling as if I was an angel that held the world. He grabs the back of my neck and drags me into a kiss, and I am more than happy to respond to the gentleness of it. However, my bliss is interrupted when I feel his body shifting on the bed, and I realise that he''s about to head out to the couch again.


    Out of instinct, I grab his arm and his eyes meet mine in a question.


    "Stay," I force out despite the breathlessness. "Stay the night."


    Riven looks at me as if I''m about to change my mind, but stays the night when I don''t.

 Chapter 31: The cruel past

    Waking up next to Riven was not something I''d ever nned to do, but now with his arms around me and my face pressed into his chest, I start wishing that I''d done it sooner. It wasn''t just his warmth that was weing, nor the feeling of his skin pressed against mine. It was the sensation that he was real, that he was alive and breathing beside me and that everything from yesterday that should have been a dream was real. I was miraculously still blissed out when the sleepiness left my body and all I could think about was Riven and the soft white curls that covered parts of his face and the scars that I can feel under the tip of my finger. His facial expression was so unnaturally rxed and once again I found myself thinking that he looked ethereal, as if wasn''t just cursed but born to be in another world.


    He had told me that he had been a scrawny boy, not impressive nor good-looking enough to attract anyone despite his money. He had told me that while he was born into a rich family and grew up with a cruel persona and that it was his friend that managed to charm everyone with his personality and make friends, not him. Everyone including Riven''s best friend and crush since childhood. He told me how he had been too scared to do anything as wey beside each other underneath the sun, that he had feared even the tiniest drop of blood. The exnation had drawn a bitterugh from him because right now, he is drowning in blood month after month. His younger self would never have believed his eyes if he saw him now. Riven had told me that he had gotten this body after the curse, which was logically due to his body adjusting to the needs of the beast and he had been overjoyed at first because he thought that he was finally better than everyone else. That joy had been short-lived when he realised that there was no one else.


    I thought about it sometimes at night, of how young and vulnerable Riven had been when he was forced to live on his own. He was only two years older than me and I had been around sixteen when the first murder happened. This meant that at the age of eighteen, Riven had already been stripped of choices. I allowed myself to touch the edge of his eyebrow where it rested peacefully with the rest of his features and wondered what the younger Riven would have thought of himself now. Would he have feared the man he had be and wished to relent for his cruelty or did he find appeal in the body and the strength that the curse offered?


    The way Riven had spoken of his eternal fear had my mind drifting back to a man of a simr kind, Hector Waby. I had not spoken of these thoughts out loud due to the fact that it would mean breaking our silence, but I had allowed myself to remember the frightened look on Hector''s face when thedybug hadnded on me. It hadn''t just been a fear of the unknown, it had been the fear of being harmed. Hector, just like Riven had been, was a boy who feared too much, but where Hector had turned to cowardice, Riven had turned to cruelty. Still, I had wondered if the same desperation for love would have been enough to drive Hector out to the woods to seek the same fate that Riven was currently living. Looking at Riven now, I couldn''t see the child he had described. While the rxed expression on his face definitely made him look younger, there was no hint of the cruelty that Riven mentioned. I tried to search for it, for something that revealed that Riven was created to hurt people, but all I found was a softness that didn''t belong to a boy who had to take lives. It made my heart ache for him. But it also made the soft morning sunlight him up like an angel, peaceful and kind. His expression shifted and he let out something that sounded like a happy sigh as his arms tightened around me. At first, I thought he was on his way to waking up, but his breath evened out again and he remained asleep despite the time being way past his usual rising hours. As I continued staring at him, I realised that for the first time in my life, the restlessness wasn''t bothering me. I didn''t know how long I''d been awake and just allowed myself to embrace Riven while allowing my thoughts to run free but I knew that in any other situation, the restlessness would have killed me. But here, under the weight of Riven''s arm, time didn''t matter. It felt like I couldy here forever with the sun on my back as long as Riven looked as peaceful as he currently did. And that realisation scared the hell out of me.


    I hated him. There were no doubts about that. Not only when I only knew him as a beast but also when I met him for the first time. I had hated him and had every intention of killing him that night if only he hadn''t stopped me to tell me that it was impossible. I had hated him the morning Theo arrived and I had hated him when Theo died. Even now, in the morning bliss, I was pretty sure that I still hated him, but not for the same reasons as before but because he was impossible to hate. I have so many reasons to hate this man, and even more reasons to avoid him for the rest of his life but I simply just couldn''t. Because he was him. Because he had, despite every harsh re, remained him. And because when I look at him now, deep asleep and unbothered by the world, I could not see the beast the same way I hadn''t been able to see his younger cruelty. I found none of the darkness I should have found, but instead only the boy he could have been if only he''d been raised right.


    Riven stirred again and this time I was certain that he was resurfacing from the ocean of sleep. His breath pattern changed and his brows furrowed for a while before he let out a yawn and his eyes fluttered open. It took him a while to readjust to the light, and even longer to realise that I was in his arms, but the grin I was greeted with when he did realise made the butterflies in my stomach flutter like their lives depended on it.


    "Good morning," Riven said, voice grumbling but eyes bright.


    "Good morning," I said back, certain that I looked as starstruck as he did right now.


    "You''re amazing, you know that right?" He said as he pulled me closer. "Gods, I can''t stop thinking aboutst night."


    "You just woke up," I pointed out with a chuckle.


    "Who said my dreams weren''t of that night as well?"


    I stopped breathing for a moment and Riven threw his head back inughter and I was caught off guard by how wonderful it was every time. I wanted to trap the sound and listen to it forever. I wanted to wake up hearing it and fall asleep to its echo.I swore, if Riven only knew where my head was at right now, he would have never let me hear the end of it.


    "Are you okay?" He asked and let his hand rest on my hips.


    It wasn''t until now I realised that I was a little sore between my legs, a consequence of not prepping properly before taking him in. Still, I couldn''t find my sanity to regret it. It had been painful, but it had been a part of it all. "I''m fine," I assured. "Starving, however."


    A grin spread on his face that revealed that he felt exactly the same.


    "How about I make some food for us then," He suggested and pressed a kiss to my forehead.


    "Depends on the menu," I teased. "Is it fish, deer or eggs today? And will it be served with bread or potatoes?"


    Despite my intentions of making a joke, Riven frowned..


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    "I wish I could make you something different," Riven admitted. "You''re going to grow sick of the same food every day."Belongs to (N)?vel/Drama.Org.


    "How about we make something different?" I suggested as I thought about what we had. "We can bake a pie. We have both flour and water and I''m sure that we can manage an eptable dough from that." Riven looked at me with a questioning look, but then smiled.


    "Whatever you desire," He responded softly. "But you''ll have to help me."


    I nodded in agreement and shifted my body to prepare myself to get out of bed when I felt something brush against my thigh. We both froze and looked at each other with wide eyes. "Really?" I breathed out in both astonishment and amusement.


    "What can I do?" Riven shrugged nonchntly but the tip of his ears was pink. "A man has his needs."


    Let''s just say that I had Riven crying out my name and cursing my "magical" mouth again before we both headed up to make a pie.

 Chapter 32: Mere moments before the unknown

    The day of the full moon, Riven''s anxiety reeked all over the ce. It wasn''t just that he impatiently paced every room he was found in, or that he once every two seconds looked at the sky as if ring at the sky would prevent the moon froming today. The most obvious sign of anxiety was the way he either always touched me, or wasn''t even present to the point where I had to search for him. That morning when we had both woken up in the same bed, his arms had been around me and his face had been buried into my shoulder as if to prevent me from going away. It had taken us both longer than usual to get out of the bed and when we did, Riven suggested that we''d make the food together, a habit we had picked up after the disastrous but still good pie baking.


    His touches were small and subtle, but they were always there; his chin on my shoulder, his hand on mine, his hips pressed against me, a kiss on the forehead, on the cheek, on the lips. I allowed him the touches because they were better than the distance which was the second alternative to his nervousness. I knew why he was like this, even if I didn''t want to think about it. There was no universe where I hadn''t figured out what I knew now, that I could die tonight. Riven had told me about the beast''s cries for me, how he''d felt it pull a little harder on its restraint every time we kissed, every time we touched. We''d already known that the werewolf wanted me as much as Riven did, but that was not the problem. The problem was that we didn''t know if the beast was aware of its own strength. It had already happened sometimes that Riven was a little too tight on his grip or too violent with his bites (every time, Riven had apologised profusely and made it up to me in the best ways possible), so we didn''t know if his beast side would be aware, or if its instincts would win and take from me onest time.


    I didn''t want to think about it because I had been busy finally adjusting and epting my life. Two months in and I finally realised that I could have ended up somewhere way worse, that Riven could have been way worse and overpowered me without my consent, instead, I was stuck with a boy who was afraid that he was crossing my boundaries when he touched me too often and I knew that I wouldn''t want it any other way. Death was hanging over me once again (it seemed to have been doing that a lottely) and I should fear its breath on my neck, instead I feared nothing, and it was better that way.


    I found Riven by the graveyard. Not crying or breaking down as I''d expected him to do, but just talking. I wasn''t surprised to see the bottle in his hand as he sat in front of Xavier''s grave, Theo''s cross right next to it. He had given me no signs to reveal that I was watching, the whiskey in his hand usually dulled his senses, but I wouldn''t be too surprised if I found out that he knew about my location. He continued talking, and I continued watching him from a distance, taking in every curve of his body and every word from his mouth.


    "...and then as if the world actually hated us, we identally burned the outer parts of it," I recognised the description of our pie. "It was one of the worst things I''ve eaten in a while, but at the same time the best thing ever because it wasn''t potatoes or bread with whatever source of protein we can get our hands on. You would have loved it, especially afterining about the food merely three weeks in."


    He took arge gulp from the bottle before he continued.


    "What I wouldn''t do to have pork again," Riven sighed. "Or perhaps rice? That would certainly be a pleasant surprise for a day."


    Riven rose from the stone, and ced his hand on the top of Xavier''s cross.


    "I miss you, friend," Riven said. "We''ll share a drink soon enough."


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    He sealed the bottle and ced it in the tree trunk before turning around, eyes immediatelynding on me. I held my breath as he approached, but he just smiled and intertwined our fingers before throwing onest look at the grave of his friend, sending his goodbye without words.


    "Come on," Riven said as he looked back at me. "Let''s go eat something before the dark closes in."


    I looked up at the sky and saw that the sun was on its way to sunset, not having painted the sky yet but indicating the colours'' arrival. I allowed him to drag me back to the house where he set the table, serving us baked bread and tomato soup as well as a piece of grilled meat on the side. Wemunicated as always and got caught up in an intruding discussion where we tried to determine what was the most useful vegetable, the squash or the tomato. I was determined on the tomato but Riven tried to convince me that he''d eaten more meals withplimentary squash than he''d done with tomatoes and I had thrown back that it was probably because he was a picky child. He had thrown his head back inughter. When the darkness finally took its im, we both moved to the outside, where the garden was once again illuminated by the magical moonlight. If it wasn''t for the curse, this night would have been the first in many to give us a perfect sky for stargazing. It was not too chilly in the air nor was it too humid. It was caught in afortable temperature between and I caught myself thinking that it felt like a small blessing from the gods.Belongs to (N)?vel/Drama.Org.


    Riven pulled me into a kiss and held me there for as long as we both could master. This kiss was desperate, pleading, and revealing. It was all his emotions poured into the closed distance between our lips and I wished that I could do the same. Riven didn''t want reassuring speeches, He had already told me thatforting words meant nothing without guarantee. And what he needed he''d taken in touch, not only now with his lips against mine but with every touch that had urred during the day. He had grazed his finger over my skin and ced gentle kisses on my face to assure himself that I was real, and that this was still his.


    Once the temperature around us dropped, Riven took several steps back. Hastily losing his clothes in the process until he was naked in the night. The moon above us made his skin sparkle like diamonds under its light, and even now, mere moments before the unknown, I found myself dazzled by his beauty. It took me all the willpower I had to keep myself from reaching out and touching him just to assure that he was still solid and real, and not some hallucination created by this ce.


    His eyes were on the sky and he stretched out his arms as if he was for the first time embracing the curse.


    Then there was the sound of snapping bones.

 Chapter 33: To love a beast

    The beast was as I remembered it,rge, sharp and dangerous. The human features it carried were only a slight reminder of who was behind this consciousness but with the white patches of fur and the long sharp ws, it still drew fear like no other. Looking at it, despite knowing what I knew, made me shback to my previous memories of the beast, none of them good. None of them I would want to relive again.


    I had been a few feets away when Riven had started his transformation, but when the beast''s familiar golden eyes fell upon me, it felt like the distance was nothing but an illusion for the foolish. Maybe because it was nothing but an illusion for the foolish. This was the moment we''d been dreading every time we thought about this night, the reaction of the beast. And for the first time in a while, I realised that I couldn''t read what emotions hid behind its eyes, behind his eyes. All I knew was that the golden eyes of his were viewing me like a deer, but whether it was to ughter or to take was unclear.


    With a swift moment, I felt my feet leave the ground and prepared myself for the impact of the hard ground. My back certainly took some fall damage and it knocked the breath out of me but surprisingly my head didn''t go through the same. Instead, I felt the softness of a hand behind my head easing the fall and when I regained my focus enough to look up I saw him staring down at me, eyes golden but it was still Riven.


    I already knew that the beast wanted me, Riven had told me that so many times that I''d lost count. I also knew that Riven had warned me that an animal that mainly relied on its instincts tended to forget its strength, and that was the mistake that was going to kill me. But looking at the beast now with his human face, pointed ears and golden eyes, I realised that we had worried for all the wrong reasons. Because while the beast did rely on its instincts, it was more like Riven than I first thought, and Riven had already gone out of the way to make sure to never hurt me. And the beast would do the same, the hand behind my head was the proof of that.


    His mouth shed with mine, and where I had expected him to be cold, he was burning hot. It wasn''t the build-up kisses that Riven used to do where he would start slowly and then chase me down the road of madness. No, this was jumping directly to that madness and pushing me down, down, down, down the rabbit hole until all I could think about was his mouth against mine and the unfamiliarity of his fangs brushing my bottom lip.


    The feeling of his ws ghosting over my skin with a light pressure had me gasping and Riven took it as an invitation to explore my mouth further, to take whatever he wanted until my lungs were aching for air. He did pull away, just so that I could breathe in violently, but almost as fast as he''d left, his lips were back on mine and demanding more, demanding everything I could give him.Text content ? N?velDrama.Org.


    In the back of my mind, I registered the difference between this side of Riven and the usual side of him. While Riven always took and gave in desperation, he still had this piece of him that held back out of fear. What kind of fear I''m not really sure. However, the beast side of him kissed like there was no tomorrow, he kissed like all his restraints had been cut off and he could finally breathe again and the realisation of it all drove me crazy. The beast was Riven, just like Riven had said, but it was a Riven driven by the want he never allowed himself to fully expose. And I realised that I didn''t mind either of the versions.


    When he pulled back again, I expected him to give me a moment of air before returning. But instead, he grabbed the cor of my shirt and tore it apart, my body following the harsh pull as the fabric tore in the middle and was thrown to the side. I stopped in the middle of a breath when this happened, but Riven paid it no mind. Instead, he did the same with my pants, and suddenly I waspletely naked against the cold grass with the beast straddling me with its arms and hips. The worst thing is that Riven is still clothed, or at least in pants, because that man has the audacity to have a pair of pants specifically made for his transformation. So while the sweeping cold surrounds me, he''s still half-covered and burning hot. The only relief in the current situation is the way his skin is pressed against mine because his heat shields me from the air of the night and I find myself pressing against his body for more warmth when he suddenly growls at the touch. With my body now exposed he moved down to my jaw and my neck and unlike previous times, I can feel his fang graze my skin as he ces his lips on me. Still, I''m not prepared when they actually sunk into my skin and caused pain so surprising that it blurs out the rest of my senses. My back arches at the cry of my nerve system and I let out a breath moan as he pulls away and starts liking the wound, his wet hot tongue t against my skin. Despite being more prepared the next time he sinks his fangs into me, I''m still overwhelmed by how good the pain feels. The teeth are just sharp enough so that it doesn''t cause any trouble while breaking through the skin but my mind still sings at the adrenaline the body sends through the system as blood starts rushing out the wound just for Riven to lick it again.


    He continues doing this as he reaches my breasts, not really biting anymore but sucking and licking until I''m writhing under the feeling of his tongue. At one point, I drew my fingers through his hair and it distracted him for a single second. Deciding that we couldn''t have it this way he gripped both my wrist with one hand and pinned them above my head, leaving mepletely at his mercy as he continued ying with my breast.


    A moan ripped out of me as I felt his other hand reach my clit and they continued to erupt as he slowly massaged it in circles, casually ghosting his finger over my entrance whenever he felt like he wanted more than just the moans and gasps I made, and the fact that he did this, made me unprepared for when he actually pushed a finger inside me. I cried out his name and lifted my hips in both surprise and anticipation and his lips returned to my mouth as his body forced me down, the feeling of his soft fur and skin pressed against me.


    He started pushing his finger in and out, in and out, with no regard for carefulness. He just kept a fast pace and kept going as I begged for more. When the second finger entered me I was both warm by his body heat and by the feeling of his rough thrust repeating himself. I almost screamed when he started scissoring me and lost all sensespletely when he curved his finger and brushed over my g-spot. I could hear him growl as he put another finger in me and returned to the rough speed he had before without hesitation, curving his long finger now and then just to hear me cry out his name. It had quickly be the only word I could master while under his mercy.


    When he quickly retracts his fingers a whimper escapes my lips, but I barely get the time to mourn before I feel the head of his cock brushing against the entrance. He doesn''t go as slow as most would have in order to let me adjust, but he didn''t go ufortably fast either. However, it was the fact that he started moving immediately that had me curse out his name and I knew that I would feel this for days toe.


    He pounded into me like this was ourst night alive and he did it without mercy, harsh and fast. The sound of skin hitting skin echoed in the night and despite being too blissed out to register anything except for the way Riven continued thrusting into me, I knew that I was making all kinds of sounds that blended and overtook the sound of the night. Perhaps it was the position, or maybe it was because of his werewolf form, but his cock was definitely bigger than I remembered it, and that is with Riven''s being big already. This felt like it could rip me apart from the inside out.


    He came with a howl as thee spilt inside me and I came shortly after that when he stuck one finger back into me along with his dick just to curve it to hit my sensitive spot. He drew out the hand but kept fucking me through both our aftershocks until it got too much and I started to cry out of oversensitivity. Even after the desperate sounds I made he kept going until he felt like he''d taken enough and then pulled out hise-covered dick.


    My breathing was still loud and heavy when he rose from where his body had been hovering over mine and I watched as he ran towards the mountains, climbing the walls with ease before he disappeared into the night.


    The back of my head threw questions at me when the loneliness seeped over me, but all I could feel was the aching between my thigh and the coldness iming my exposed skin.

 Chapter 34: A certain visit

    I woke up by the sound of a door crashing over and immediately craned my neck to see who it was without moving from the couch. As expected, Riven stumbled in as his usual self again but still covered in blood just like he''d beenst time. His eyes were frantic and wide as he searched the room before his eyes met mine and we both froze in our current positions. For a moment, I wondered if it had all been for nothing. If we''d failed and another life had been taken tonight. His hands and face were still sttered with blood, and if I focused enough I could smell the iron taking over the air. Still, my eyes found their way back to Riven''s and that''s when I saw that there were tears lurking in the corner of his eyes. "Riven?" I asked concerned and wondering what bad news I would hear the next moment.


    "Are you okay?" Riven asked desperately as his eyes scanned my body. Bruises were covering it once again, some from the soft touch of lips, while others were from a too-harsh grip against delicate skin.


    "I''m fine," I assured him when I saw his eyes scan each and every one of the marks. "Just a little bruised and sore but I''m fine."


    Then Riven fell onto his knees.


    Nothing would have prepared me for the desperate sound that escaped Riven''s throat as he hit the ground. It was a mix between augh, a sob and a loud exhale. All I could think of is how this was the moment we both realised that it hadn''t worked, that despite our efforts to keep the beast distracted, Riven had still been forced to take a life while I''d been giving my body up for nothing. I didn''t know how to react to this realisation and much less how to steel myself for the truth once Riven voiced them. But instead of the deration of our failure, Riven said something else.


    "I didn''t take anything," His voice had been muffled into his hand but I had still heard enough to stop my train of thought. "I didn''t take... We didn''t kill... They''re alive."


    This time he looked up at me and I could see the trails of tears rolling down his eyes.


    "It worked," Riven''s smile was wider than I''d ever seen it. "Liliana, you beautiful creature, it actually worked."


    Without any regard for the soreness around my body and between my thighs I moved to ce myself right in front of Riven. And when I did I reached out to pull him into a hug, holding on to his body as if it was thest oxygen left on earth. Riven, in return, buried his face into my shoulder where I could feel the remains of his cold tears and the smile on his lips. People in my town had survived, they had gotten another night of peace and after tonight, I was hopeful that their lives would remain that way.


    The feeling of relief that overcame me was nothing inparison to the feelings Riven was showing. In the middle of the stress of the situation, I had forgotten what this must have felt like to him, to have the possibility of another life dangled before his eyes. And now, it wasn''t just a possibility, it had happened, and we had figured out a way to stop Riven from taking things that weren''t his, by giving him things that were.


    Riven lifted his head and cradled my face in his hands before pressing his lips against mine. This was the opposite of the kisses the beast had given me, this one was soft, giving and full of gratitude. I couldn''t help but melt into the kiss as the familiarity of his lips was on mine and despite the hard floor under us, I couldn''t think of another ce where I''d like to be.


    When he pulled back, his eyes looked at me with wonder and I felt his hand drop from my jaw to my waist.


    "Don''t," I said almost immediately but his smile didn''t falter. "I''m too sore today."


    Riven nodded with understanding.


    "Of course," He responded softly. "I wouldn''t dream of taking more than you''ve already given."


    My heart burst from the warmth in his voice and I was pretty sure that we were in a middle stage between reality and heaven when he took my hand to kiss my knuckles, giving each and every one of them the same form of appreciation.


    The door burst open and we both flew to our feet, Riven quickly shielding my body by cing me behind him while I instinctively reached for therge nket on the couch to wrap around myself and hide my exposed body. The house around us rattled by the violent wind and it went on like that for a moment before the cold breezes finally left the building and revealed a stranger by the door. It was a young female with wild hair and the colour of fire while her eyes carried the colour of the sky. She was clothed in one of the finest dresses and cloaks I''ve ever seen, both emerald green while her wrist and neck were decorated with an endless collection of gold.


    In front of me, Riven growled, and I got the sudden sense that Riven knew exactly who this woman was.


    "It had been a while, Riven," The stranger said with her honey-sweet voice as she threw her hair over her shoulder. "My, my, how you have grown."


    There was a low threatening sounding from the back of Riven''s throat and when I tore away my eyes from the young female to study his expression I saw burning hatred that could have killed a man on the spot if only the magic worked its way. It suddenly dawned upon me who the stranger was, and I couldn''t stop myself from voicing the next words.


    "You''re the witch," The sound of my voice caught the stranger''s attention and I saw how her grin grew wider. Riven, clearly not a fan of the look she gave me, wrapped his arm around my waist and moved to shield me even further. "Indeed I am," The witch mused and let out a delightedugh. "She''s a quick one, don''t you think, Riven?"


    "Don''t talk about her," Riven hissed through his teeth and stared the witch down.


    "No need to get so territorial," The witch waved dismissively with one hand. "I am not here for her. I''m just here to see for myself why a life wasn''t taken this month. It''s the second time, the first being two months ago, and my curiosity was eating me alive."Published by N?v''elD/rama.Org.


    "It is none of your business," Riven threw back. "You cursed me to kill but you better stay out of my way."


    "I think the fact that I cursed you makes it my business," The witch responded, showing no fear for Riven''s cold attitude. "But I see now what the reason is."


    Her eyes were about to travel back to me but Riven took a step forward and regained her attention.


    "You have your answer, now leave," Riven ordered but the witch didn''t back down.


    "How rude of you," She ced her hand dramatically on her heart. "It''s been a while since west met, you know, and this is how you greet me? You can at least show me some decency first, apliment on my improved looks maybe." She straightened her dress and smiled sweetly. I had to ce my hand on Riven to keep him from leaping towards her-


    "You look younger," Riven forced out. "Now get out of my house!"


    "But aren''t you curious?" She batted her eyshes and I considered letting Riven kill her on the spot. "How did I manage to look so young? You''ll grow old someday too you


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    know, wouldn''t it be nice to look like you''re in your youth while ageing to the finest?"


    "I have no interest in what you have to offer me," Riven scolded and took a step back.


    "Oh, I know that. I just wondered what happened to my life supply."


    That was when I realised what she was implying. She''d been older when Riven first met her, Riven had said so himself. She''d also managed to age backwards and was so proud of it that she openly praised her own youth and looks while Riven contemted murdering her. But his praise wasn''t why she was here. I recognised the concept of magic enough to know that everythinges with a price, and I was pretty sure that an anti-ageing spell required more than just flowers. "You use the lives he''s taken for your youth," I breathed out and this time even Riven''s eyes snapped to me. "That''s why you''re here. Because you just lost your source to immortality."


    "It is barely immortality," The witch corrected me with a satisfied grin. "Riven is bound to die someday. But it is some extra years."


    "All those lives," Riven''s voice was no longer cold and collected. "All. Those. Lives! For a few extra years."


    "Otherwise the lives would have gone to waste," She shrugged her shoulders, unbothered by the conversation. "That would have been a pity."


    "So what now," Riven hissed. "Are you going to force me to start killing again? Have me continuing to take lives for your youth?!"


    "You''re very mistaken dear boy," The witch furrowed her brows. "I am grateful for the extra years but to be quite honest, I have enough as it is." The witch paused for a second and we both held our breaths.


    "I am here to set you free, Riven. You can finally rest."


    My heart was beating hopefully in my chest for the words he witch had just said, but Riven wasn''t as quick to hope.


    "And what will you have in return?" He asked. "My firstborn?"


    She shook her head. "No silly. You can''t have children if you''re dead."


    My heart stopped at the sound of her words.


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    "I can''t just end the curse," The witch exined. "This is who you are now. But you can finally rest if you want to. I can set you both free."


    This time her eyes travelled between me and Riven.


    "All you have to do," She continued with her eyes on me. "Is killing him."


    Beside me, Riven froze.


    The witch drew a dagger from the inside pocket of her cloak. It was made of steel and decorated with vines of gold and flowers of diamonds. It was beautiful, and the most awful thing one could ever present to me.


    "You kill him with this dagger, and he''s dead, no takebacks," The witch studied the object in her hand. "Then you can return to your home and your life as if nothing had happened."


    At some point, I''d stopped breathing. This was what I''ve wanted since I''ve gotten here, a chance to return. But now, with the dagger in front of me, I wasn''t so certain about my choice anymore. I looked over to Riven who had his eyes stered on the dagger in her hand and realised that he truly believed that I was going to use it. Because he believed that his life wasn''t something worth saving.


    "No," I said with as much force as I could. "I will not take a life just to have my own.


    And for the first time, her smile faltered.


    "Don''t you realise," She said slowly. "That this dagger holds all you''ve ever wanted? Your return? Revenge for your mother?"


    Mentioning my mother was a low blow, but I couldn''t unsee the hopelessness in Riven''s face.


    "I won''t kill him," I said again, more certain than thest.


    Her eyes travelled between me and him again, and when I thought she was going to try to convince me further, she just shrugged. "Suit yourself," She shrugged. "But the dagger is yours if you want it."


    And then, in a fog of leaves and green, she disappeared, the daggerying perfectly still where her feet had just been.

 Chapter 35: Reaching for a life I want

    All sense of victory was gone after that. It seemed like hours before one of us finally moved and when we did, we moved like ghosts, our presence only haunting the house.


    The worst thing was that there was no possibility for us to forget that the witch''s visit had ever happened, because the dagger was still on the floor where it had been left, a constant reminder that we could not look past her existence. Every time I looked at it, it seemed like a curse, like another burden to bear. The witch had promised me the one thing I''ve wanted since I got here, in exchange for something I refused to take. Perhaps if she''d been a month earlier I would have jumped the opportunity immediately and stabbed him in the heart. But I couldn''t do that now, not anymore. Stabbing Riven in the back was as unnatural to me as not flinching when I put my hand on a hot surface, it wasn''t possible. I was sure about that. But I wasn''t sure if Riven was as convinced.


    He looked at the dagger more times than I did, and every time, it was with an expression of resignation. He would move around in the house, prepare warm water, get out necessary ingredients, and rearrange things that had moved with the wind, but every time his eyesnded on the dagger he froze. Just for the shortest of seconds, he froze, and then he would return to his task. And every time he froze, it was as if he lost a little bit of faith in himself, and in me. And I hated it. Once things were in order again, Riven approached me from where I had been sitting on the couch, a damp towel in one hand and bandages and container with clear salve on the other. He said nothing as he started working on my wounds and bruises. The bastard even had the nerve to avoid my eyes while I was desperately trying to catch his expression for some kind of sign.


    Momentster, my patience was out, and I was about to break the silence, but Riven beat me to it.


    "I think you should take the deal."


    My thoughts came to a stop. What?


    Riven was still not looking at my face, but he must have read my reaction based on my body reaction because he continued.


    "Think about it," He took my other hand to carefully ce some balm upon one of the bruises he''d left behind, and I found it unfair that we were having this conversation while he was casually massaging me. "You get what you want, with no obligations. No bargain. No promises you didn''t want to make. No cage. You get to live the life you choose for yourself before I became a part of it and your town will still remain unharmed. This is what you''ve always wanted. And you finally have the chance to take it. So I think you should."


    There was a silence between us before I managed to speak.


    "But you would die," Saying the words out loud was almost too much alone. "You would have to die."


    Riven shrugged, as if we were discussing the conditions of ourtest harvest of tomatoes.


    "Do you want to die?" I asked instead and watched Riven''s shoulders tense. "Riven, do you still want to die?"


    Was it selfish of me to think that he''d let go of that wish the second we seeded? Was it selfish of me to think that I was enough to make him want to stay alive? Riven''s


    issues go deeper than I will ever know, but in the past weeks he''d seemed happier. Even his talks with Xavier had been lighter than the first ones I heard. Was I imagining it? Had I been naive to think that I was helping?


    "I want you to be happy," Riven responded and I was grateful that he didn''t mechanically return to his task. Instead, he held my hands as if they were precious jewels and stayed there.


    "That wasn''t what I asked," My voice was barely above a whisper. "Riven, do you still want to die?"


    Now it was his turn to process before answering.


    "I''ve only wanted two things in my life wholeheartedly," Riven said and finally raised his chin so that our eyes met. I should have been relieved to find some humanity behind the green but all I found was his grief. He was already mourning something that hadn''t been lost.


    "I''ve only wanted two things in my life," He repeated again and didn''t drop my gaze. "For my love. And for her to be happy."


    My breath hitched when I realised what he was saying. He was not responding to my question because this was the only response that was real. It wasn''t that he wanted to die. Whether death was a requirement or not depended solemnly on his other wishes. And all of them depended solemnly on someone else.


    The knowledge both warmed and hurt my heart and I wondered how the past me couldn''t have seen past his obvious charade. Because while he had been a cold-hearted jerk, none of it was actually his fault. It had been the only way he knew how to protect his heart, because boys like him didn''t survive otherwise. Boys that loved with all their being. Riven had loved his friend and it had carved out his inside to the point where pure desperation drove his instincts. And now, he loved me enough to give up his life so that I would be happy, because he still saw himself as a second choice. Only chosen because of the circumstances. And I realised that that wasn''t exactly true.


    The dagger on the floor seemed to be glowing. But it did not give me the tempting effect it was supposed to have. Instead, the sight of it was repulsive. It was another deal. Another trick from the witch where one had to suffer in order for another to feel even the slightest bit alive. But that wasn''t the bargain I wanted. I wasn''t after one life in exchange for another. I wanted life to improve, not stay in the middle. So if I stabbed Riven, I would have been like stabbing myself in the back. And meanwhile, the life I would have gained, would have been unlivable due to the foundation it would have been on. I wasn''t after blood anymore, despite the months and months in training. I wanted peace. And for the first time, I knew how to achieve it.


    "I love you." The words had been out before I''d even gotten the chance to overthink it. And I said it again for good measure. "I love you, Riven."N?velDrama.Org: owner of this content.


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    "Liliana?" My name came out as a question and a plea, but I just continued.


    "I thought it was magic at first," I admitted. "I thought it was the canyon pushing us together and forcing me to feel you. But it wasn''t. It is like our blood sings the same melody and finally has created this perfect duet. My body knows more about you than my mind does and it has never been safer. I love you, Riven. And I don''t know why, nor do I know how it happened. I just know that it did, and that it is my own choice this time. Not someone else''s. Not another force. I love you not because you''re my mate or your promised love. I think I love you because I understand you. And despite giving you almost nothing, you understand me as well."


    "Liliana," Riven moved so that his eyes were the same height as mine and gently cradled my head between his hands. "You can''t say it if you don''t... You have to mean it. You can''t... I can''t handle it if you''re saying it and it''s not real." I did not shy away from the intensity of his gaze. Nor did I miss the doubt in his voice.


    "I love you," I said again, more determined this time. "It took me a while to figure out but it''s real, Riven. I love you."


    He ced his lips on mine, gently not to hurt me any further but with every emotion sparkling between our lips. I immediately melted into his touch and did all I could to savour the feeling of his soft lips against mine, of his hand resting on my jaw and the other brushing my hair. Riven was a boy that had too much love to give and no one who was willing to receive it. I was more than determined to change that.


    Meanwhile, the dagger remained on the floor like a useless prop by a child. It would always be an opportunity. But the kiss we had sealed that it would remain nothing. And when we bothter put it away, I offered it to Riven, to ce it whenever he wanted, as a sign of my trust. And in return, he ced it somewhere we both could reach. The response being that he trusted me as well.

 Chapter 36: The past that haunts

    The woods were dark that night. Darker than I remembered, and more endless as well. This was what should have tipped me off that something was wrong, but instead, my attention was drawn to the gravestones on the ground. Not crosses of wood, real gravestones, endless and endless of them with names carved in. Some which I recognised, others which I didn''t. Theo''s name was one of them, my mother''s was another.


    It was the sound of snapping branches that caused me to turn around, and what I saw right in front of me made it impossible to breathe. There was blood dripping everywhere, even the leaves of the trees seemed to cry in red. The sound of dragging feet was ear-deafening, but not as overwhelming as the smell of rotten meat and iron that took over everything. "Liliana..."


    That was probably the worst thing of them all, that I still remembered her voice enough to know who she was despite the hanging pieces of flesh and the exposed eyeball. After all these years, I could still remember the sound of her voice. Even through the blood. My mother took one step forward, and I could have sworn that she would crumble to her knees. Her step was unnatural and I could see parts of the bone poking out through the thigh. Still, she remained standing and took another step.


    "Liliana..." She said again and I couldn''t move. "Did you forget? Did you forget me?"


    She reached out her hands and held it inches from my face, not really touching it but still living a ghost-like sense of its wrongness on my skin.


    "Did you forget me?" She asked again, softer this time. "Did you forget the promise you made me? Did you forget that this was your fault?" "Mother," I croaked out, my voice swallowed by the sound of moving dirt. "Please..."


    "This is your fault, my dear," She stopped in front of me, hand still hovering over my cheek. "I wouldn''t have been sleeping on the couch if it wasn''t for you. I wouldn''t have attracted the monster with my blood. You just needed toe home."


    As if to make a point, more blood started dripping from her wounds and skinless parts.


    "Have you forgotten that this is your fault?"


    And had grabbed my shoulder and I violently flinched back to see corpse after corpse looking right at me, some rotten and green, while others were a little more like my mother, red and bleeding. "Liliana..."


    I looked down and saw Theo, the wounds on his chest seemed deeper than I remembered them and the sacks under his eyes were dark, hollow, and tear-streaked. His hand had managed to remain on my shoulder despite the hard flinch and I was unable to do anything to force him to let me go.


    "You promised," He said, tears mixed with blood streaming down his face. "You promised that we would be alright. But he''s alive."


    "I... I can''t," I manage to stammer just in time to feel another hand on my shoulder. This time, it wasn''t a face I recognised. "Liliana..." The corpses were singing in a choir now. "Liliana..."


    "Liliana!"


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    The clear sound of my name made me turn back to where my mother stood. But she was no longer the bloody body that was imprinted in my mind. Instead, she was the mother from before the ident, the one with hair always in order and eyes bright but stern. She was the mother that made me hold on to her after all these years. The one that baked bread in the morning and scolded my brother for taking my toys. She was the mother that tucked me into my bed every night and told me tales about the life I was supposed to have. She was the mother I''d tried holding onto. And she was also in the ws of a monster.


    Riven wasn''t in his beast form, at least not hisplete transformation during full moons. Instead, he was in the form he''d shown me that he could control, where he was mostly human, but with long ws and sharp fangs. He held my mother in a death grip with pointed ws towards the pulse point. His eyes were dark and hungry, and I could sense his thirst for blood by only looking at him.


    It took all I had to tear my eyes away from him and face my mother who was looking at me with teary eyes.


    "Liliana," She pleaded. "Stop him, please. Liliana."


    I looked back at Riven.


    "Riven?" I said slowly, trying my best to reason with him. "Please don''t. This isn''t you."


    "You cursed me," He bit out. Voice deep and growling. "You made me this. A killer. A monster. I tried to warn you. But you gave me no choice."


    "Please," I begged. Not only for my mother but for him, and for everyone else that was a victim of this curse.


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    He shed her throat without hesitation. And before I could even let out a scream, he leapt over me and I heard him tear into flesh. Body after body refilling the graves. One after one bleeding under his mercy.


    An inhuman scream ripped out from my throat at some point and the next thing I knew, I was on my knees, begging him to stop, begging my mother to forgive me, begging the world to end this now. It was just prayer after prayer. Plea after plea. And all were left unanswered.


    I bolted out of the bed in full panic, and had Riven jumping closer to the edge in the process. Sweat was covering my body and I could still hear my violent heartbeat thumping in my ears and blood rushing past everything and up to my brain. The world outside the window was dark, but I could still see every silhouette clearly as if their shadows had souls. At some point, I could have sworn that there was a silhouette of a boy in the room as well. But almost as quickly as I''d spotted it, it was gone.Published by N?v''elD/rama.Org.


    It wasn''t until then that I realised that I was gripping something cold and hard with my right hand. Looking down at it, I saw the dagger in my hand, glowing and almost taunting me with its presence. Almost as if it had burned me, I threw it out of reach and looked to my left.


    Riven''s eyes were wide as he was looking between the dagger and me, and one of his hands was hovering over my shoulder, as if he was uncertain if he was allowed to touch me or not.


    I grabbed that hand with my own and squeezed it tightly, using the feeling of his solidness as a grounding point. He moved slowly after that, manoeuvring our body until I was leaning towards him and giving me every opportunity to move away. I sighed when his warmth wrapped around mine, and he took it as a sign to pull me closer.


    "We''ll have to bury that dagger," I said after a moment of silence had passed. "I don''t know why the witch wants me to kill you but we can''t have it magically manifesting in my hand."


    Riven rested his head upon mine.


    "We will take care of it tomorrow, love," He ced a gentle kiss on the top of my head. "Now we rest.¡±


    I exhaled slowly and pressed my body even closer to him. The dream had been horrible but it had also only been a dream. Riven and I had found a way to keep him from killing. Which meant that no more had to die under the curse of the full


    moon.

 Chapter 37: Looking for my hearts home

    The following day, we both moved slower than usual. I because despite the fact that the beast hadn''t intentionally hurt me, it had still been rough in its pace. The morning had been one forziness andfort. His arms had been around my waist and his head was tucked between my shoulder and my chin as the curve of his back followed mine. The weight of him alone had been thefort I needed once the blurry memories of tonight''s nightmare came back to me, but somehow in his sleep he must have sensed my building anxiety because his grip had tightened and his lips had brushed over my shoulders like a soft kiss. The smile that grew on my face after that was uncontainable. Hourster and I had been left alone to enjoy the sun while Riven was lurking somewhere in the dark woods. The dagger had gone with him and he had suggested that I''de with him so that I knew where it was buried but not only did I not feel the necessity in knowing that, I also wanted to stay away from the woods for today, just to avoid negative reactions. I thought back to the dream a lot, and picked it apart until I could understand it. And despite what my subconscious tried to convince me, I knew that it wasn''t the end that would happen if I didn''t kill Riven. They were already dead, and I was a griever like everyone else, but taking another life will not bring them back. And the revenge that had once been my only goal, was a narrow-minded thought by a girl unprepared to see the truth.


    So I walked around in the sun, unbothered by the damp grass under my bare feet or the sound of buzzing bees just a bit further away, waiting for the next step of the day. Or just waiting. Because it feels like I''ve always been moving forward, so maybe it was time for me to take a deep breath and stop running. I liked the thought of that. I liked the peacefulness it offered.


    A hand grabbed mine and I yelped in surprise as I spun around. I had expected white untamed hair and deep green eyes but was instead greeted by something else. I was moments away from letting out a horrified scream as a hand sped over my mouth, taking away any ability to make a sound and forcing me to just stare at the person in front of me.


    Auburn hair and blue eyes. Nathan.


    My eyes were wide and I had to force myself to blink several times just to make sure that it wasn''t a hallucination. And after what felt like forever, I realised that he was still there. A little rougher looking than usual with untamed hair and clothes lose and dirty but it was still his blue eyes and the crinkle around his eyes as he smiled.


    "Nathan..." I whispered, and it was barely audible due to his hands.


    Something in him rxed because he pulled his hand away and grabbed my face to pull me into a kiss instead. His lips were chapped and the pressure a little rough, but I had learnt how he kissed the many stolen moments we had taken together and was more than relieved to realise that I hadn''t forgotten the familiarity of him.


    When he pulled away, we both gasped for air. But since he seemed unwilling to let me go any further than inches between us our breaths mingled and he rested his forehead on mine. Seeing him was like entering another universe. I hadn''t expected to see him again, not in this lifetime and definitely not here. During my stay, I had purposely pushed away so much of him because otherwise, I wouldn''t have been able to move on with my life. Nathan had been the one person I couldn''t let go of unless I forced myself to forget. But now that he was here, right in front of me, I couldn''t understand how I''d even managed to forget someone so important, whether by will or not.Belongs to (N)?vel/Drama.Org.


    "I knew that I would be able to see you again," Nathan said in the space between us. "I explored the woods for weeks and weeks without finding anything, I only returned when the rations got critically low but even then a part of me told me that you were alive, and that I could find you if only you tried."


    "You found me," I responded and ced my hands on each side of his head. "You found me, Nathan. I can''t believe you''re here."


    An amused chuckle escaped from his throat. "I guess watching you learn how to track had some uses after all. It took a while, but it led me here."


    He ced a short kiss on my lips again before taking a step back.


    "Come on," Nathan held out his hand. "Let''s go home. I have a rope over there I used to climb down and we should take the same way up. After all, we have a wedding to attend."


    It wasn''t until then reality hit me, and I realised that I had a decision to make. My previous life was something I''d wished for since I came here, but I had epted that it would forever remain an unanswered wish, a distant dream. But now, with the opportunity in front of me, I had no clue what to do. Riven was still in the woods, hiding the dagger that should have been my answer a month ago. Meanwhile, Nathan was in front of me, unaware of the betrayal I was guilty of as he offered me a way home. Nausea hit me like a raging storm, and I involuntarily took a step back.


    Nathan furrowed his brows. "Liliana?"


    Looking back at Nathan, I realised that while he''d spent two months searching for me, I had spent this past month fucking another. It had been to keep them safe, to keep him safe, but looking at it now, I knew that it wasn''t the case anymore. And I knew that my new excuse wasn''t as justifiable.


    Nathan''s hand was still out, and he looked between me and the rope that was supposed to take us home. But while my eyes remained on him, my mind wandered to the white-haired boy on the other side of the de. I wondered if we knew that we hadpany. I wondered if Riven were listening to our conversation as we spoke.


    "Liliana," He said again, and I realised that this was thest time I would ever have him looking at me so softly.


    "I can''t," It physically hurt to utter the words.


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    Nathan''s face got stern as he started looking around us, searching for something in the ce that had held me captive for two months.


    "Whoever''s keeping you here can go fuck themself," Nathan said as he took a step closer to me. "I will fight whoever they are."


    His response made the entire thing even worse.


    "No," I forced out. "You don''t understand. I can''t leave."


    "Liliana, unless you are about to say that you have some curse over you that''s keeping you here then I suggest we should go," He grabbed my hand and looked around a little frantically. "I mean, I was serious about fighting whoever is trying to keep you here, but if we can avoid it that would be lovely."


    My legs locked themselves when Nathan started pulling my arm and the look he gave me was in disbelief.


    "Nathan I..."


    Then there was a gunshot.

 Chapter 38: When worlds collide

    The gunshot was like an echo forever ringing in my ear. On my left, I could hear someone yelling my name, but in front of me, Nathan''s body fell forwards and knocked me off my feet. It was the collision of our bodies that woke me from the horrifying frozen moment and when I pulled Nathan''s body back to look at him I saw red. The blood already staining his shirt as his inhales and exhales took up an insatiable pattern.


    I didn''t notice my hands shaking until I had to turn him onto his back to cradle his face between them. His eyes were vivid. His pupils were looking everywhere and I could feel the warmth from the blood from where his body was resting against mine. Nothing else in the world mattered except for the fact that I was losing him, and I was losing him like this.


    ¡°Nathan,¡± I croaked out and felt the tears stream down my face. "Hang on, okay? Just hang on and it will be okay."


    The sound of my voice had his eyes returning to mine and I felt my heart ache as I realised that the life in his eyes was already fading. The vibrant blue was duller than just some moments before, when everything was okay. Does this ce take life the same way it gives life, quicker and without hesitation?


    "Liliana!" The sound of approaching footsteps caused my head to turn to the left.


    I noticed immediately that the first thing I looked at was his hands, but they were empty. When I then shamefully moved to scan his face, Riven''s expression was as vivid and caught off guard as I felt, his eyes darting between Nathan and someone on the other side of the de.


    Following his eyes, itnded on my own, the same warm brown colour and the same dark curls on the top of his head. Varius stood a couple of feet away, the fun in his hand once again aimed but this time towards Riven. I didn''t know whose life I feared the most, Riven with a gun aimed at him, or Varius when the beast woulde out to save itspanion.


    "Stop!" I screamed out over the de, covering both of Nathan''s ears as if loud sounds were his biggest problem for the moment. "Varius don''t!"


    My brother''s eyes travelled to mine but the gun was still aimed towards Riven who had his hands up in the air in surrounder, but an expression that said that this wasn''t the end.


    "You better listen to her," Riven said, voice in no way louder than mine had been but still clearer in the air. "This won''t end in your favour if you pull that trigger."


    "Are you threatening me?" Varius looked back at Riven with more determination than before.


    "Stop, both of you!" I yelled again but tore my eyes away from both of them to look down at Nathan who was still fighting for his life. "We need to help him! We need to..."


    "He''s a lost cause," Riven said beside me. "The de won''t let him survive."


    "No!" I screamed back at Riven. "I don''t give a single damn about what the de will or will not do but I am not letting him die."


    More tears streamed down my face when I heard him say my name.


    "Liliana..." In a surrounding of screams his whisper was a clear contrast. "Liliana."


    I looked down at him and past the tears in my eyes, I could see Nathan''s tears as well. He was already giving up, and I was unable to do anything.


    "You''re beautiful, you know that right?" He said as if it was relevant now, as if he wasn''t dying. "You''ve always been beautiful."


    "You don''t get to say that," I sobbed. "You don''t get to say that when you don''t know what I''ve done."


    His eyes wandered in the direction where Riven was, but I wasn''t sure if he could see him from where he was. Still, a sad smile ghosted over his lips as his eyes returned to mine.


    "I don''t know what you''ve done," Nathan whispered. "But I want you to be happy."


    "I''m a monster," I pressed my forehead onto his and closed my eyes. "I''m a..."


    "You love him," This caused me to draw back and face him again.


    "I love you," I said in weak protest, because I couldn''t find any strength anymore. Not when I was losing another.


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    "I know you do," Nathan smiled and his hand came up to brush away one of my tears. "And that will be the greatest pleasure in my life."


    "It shouldn''t have to be," I shook my head. "You deserve so much more."


    "I never wanted more than you."


    And if my heart hadn''t already been breaking, it would have shattered at the sound of that. My three worlds were colliding, and in mere seconds one of them had been eliminated. The universe knew that these realities couldn''t exist with each other. The life with my family, the life with my love and the life with my mate were three different lives, and I so desperately and greedily wanted them all, but the odds had never been in my favour.


    "In another life," Nathan started out carefully. "We would have been married right now. I would have bought a small house in the outskirts of town where we would build whatever we wanted to build and do whatever we wanted to do." I hadn''t realised that my tears had stopped streaming until they started again.


    "We would have had children, one or a dozen," Nathan let out a small chuckle but then winced in pain. "One of the girls would have been like you, hot-headed, stubborn and a menace to society. But we would have loved her regardless." "Don''t do this," I found myself whispering in the distance between us. "I can''t..."


    "You can," Nathan smiled. "You can because I am living that life right now. While in your arms, I see it all before me. We would have a son that was too afraid of the world until you showed him how harmless the world could be with the right perspective. The girl would be named after your mother, and the boy..."


    "Theo," I blurted out, allowing myself to y along with his reality. "I would love one of the boys'' names to be Theo."


    Nathan took some time to think, or maybe he had to catch his breath, I wasn''t sure. All I knew was that I held him, and while the world around us was falling apart, he had already taken escape to another ce far more beautiful than the one we were currently in. A ce where his eyes weren''t growing more and more dull but instead bright as theughter of his children, our children filled his ears. A ce where the sun almost always shone and when it didn''t, we danced in the rain. A ce where instead of the blood covering our hands from where we''d both pointlessly tried to stop the flowing blood, there were rings on our fingers that symbolised forever. Nathan and I were in that ce together, but only one of us would have to wake up from the daydream.


    "I like that name," Nathan finally said. "Theo. It''s pretty. And another boy will have to be after my father, otherwise, they will use us of favouritism."


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    "We can''t have that," I let out a shakyugh that was mainly lost between my sobs, but Nathan''s smile told me that he heard it anyway.


    "They would have hated you," Nathan said with as little emotions as he could muster.


    "I know," I said as if it didn''t matter.


    Maybe because it didn''t. Not anymore.


    "I don''t care about that," His voice was almost defensive, but the strength was lost in his desperation to stay awake.


    "I know," I said again.


    "I love you."


    My breath hitched again because it was such a selfish thing for him to say right now. And it caused everything to overflow once again.


    "I love you," I said and pressed a light kiss on his forehead.


    The sound of his breathing was all that I could focus on after that. By now, there was too little air to even form words and the sound of his desperate breathe takes made it hard for me not to start praying to whoever would listen. The ruffling of the leaves and the smell of blood and grass were nothingpared to the sight of Nathan''s shallow breaths and it felt like if I didn''t say anything soon. I wouldn''t be able to say anything at all for the rest of my life.


    "Please don''t leave me," I begged despite the hopelessness that hung between us. "Please stay awake."


    Nathan had stopped breathing before I''d even finished myst sentence.N?velDrama.Org: owner of this content.


    Somewhere inside me, a light was put out.

 Chapter 39: My own death

    As if Nathan''s death had been the death of my emotions, my mind sobered. Somewhere in the breach of my consciousness, my mind wasughing at how simr this position was for me. Another body in my arms. Another life I couldn''t save. I almostughed at the irony. Years and years trying to end something to save everyone ended up being the only reason I had watched so many die. I almost wanted tough. I could hear the gods alreadyughing.


    Look at her, they said as they all peered down at me. Another lover gone, another life she failed to save.


    There were no tears streaming down my face, and the violent sobs had turned into smaller shivers. Nathan was dead, and the life we had would forever remain a dream. Because I was taken by a beast. And because I couldn''t leave him. In the back of my mind, someone yelled and said that I didn''t deserve to hold his body as if it was valuable to me, not after the way I''d handled his heart. But that voice and every other sense within me could go and drown themselves, because nothing they said mattered. Nathan was dead. And I was holding his body.


    Looking up, I saw both Riven and Varius looking at me and Nathan. They had not moved from their previous spots but the way they stood was different. Varius'' gun was still pointed towards Riven, but it was slightly lowered and he wasn''t looking at the target. Riven''s entire body gave off an aura of defeat. Why he was so defeated, I didn''t know. I just knew that I couldn''t handle another body today.


    "Put down the gun," I said to my brother and startling him out of his trance. "Varius, put down the gun."


    "We do not know if there''s a threat nearby," But even his voice was a little uncertain. "I will not put down the gun until I''ve made sure that the beast isn''t around." In my peripheral vision, Riven nced down at me, but I was looking straight at my brother and the weapon in his hand.


    "You''ve already taken a life today," I said as determined as I could. "Don''t waste another one."


    Varius'' eyes wandered down to where Nathan''s head was resting on my chest, and I felt this sudden urge to hide him from prying eyes.


    "I did not mean to kill an innocent man," Varius said as he looked between me and the corpse. "I thought it was..."


    "You thought it was the beast," Riven said, and none of us was expecting him to speak so our attention was immediately drawn to him.


    "He is not the beast," I said defensively as I looked back at my brother. "You''ve seen the beast up close. You can see that Nathan was nothing like it."


    Varius hesitated before answering. "I had been informed that the beats would have the shape of a human boy. A spirit told me so. And I was not going to take chances."N?velDrama.Org: owner of this content.


    The word spirit echoed in my head and I didn''t realise why until I figured out who he was referring to. She had not been a spirit when we had met her but she hadn''t been far from one either. Light could be deceptive, and magic as well. I looked down at Nathan''s resting face as I realised what this discovery meant. Nathan''s death had not really been a coincidence. Nor had Varius'' sudden appearance. The witch had made a decision to take matters into her own hands, and taken away the opportunity she''d offered me to begin with. Now, no matter who I stabbed in the back, I wouldn''t get to live the life I had longed for. A fire of anger started up deep in my chest and I could feel my breath quickening. Between the gunshot and up till now, I had been convinced that Nathan''s death was on my hands. Even if Varius had been the one to pull the trigger I had been the direct cause. So knowing that Nathan''s death was nothing but a consequence of pettiness, and that the same person was the root of all our problems, made me want to rip something apart.


    "Liliana," Riven''s voice was calm but determined when he called my name, so I turned my head towards him.


    His face was cold but his eyes hurt when he looked at me. And somehow, I knew that he had puzzled the pieces together just like I''d done.


    "Don''t direct your thoughts to her," Riven said as if it was the easiest thing in the world. "She''llugh at the energy wasted."


    And thest thing I wanted her to do was to take another breath of joy.


    "Please put down the gun," I said again to my brother, the exhaustion taking ahold of me. The sentence had almoste out as a plea. "I can''t..."


    I mentally forced my thoughts away from that trail of memories.


    "I will," Varius said, his hand still wrapped around the same object that ended so many of my dreams. "When we get out of here."


    Looking at the situation, I wondered if I''d ever spoken at all. None of them seemed to hear what I''d already repeated a thousand times. Nathan had insisted and lost his life. Varius was now doing the exact same thing, his mind only going in one direction. And beside me, Riven tensed again, because he once again believed that he would be cast aside for someone else.


    I was tired beyond measure. Tired of losing. Tired of watching everything around me unfold without consideration for my preferences. But most of all, I was tired of speaking and not being heard. So I spoke again, this time more determined than the previous times.


    "I won''t be going with you, Varius," I said, tone almost bored due to exhaustion but still loud enough for all to hear. "I can''t."


    "What do you mean you can''t?" My brother questioned as he finally lowered the weapon. Somewhere inside me, relief washed over me.


    "I won''t." I said instead, and hoped that the message would be clearer. "I''m sorry, I really am. But I can''t return to a vige of limitations and restrictions. I just can''t."


    "If this is about the marriage..."


    "It''s not just about the forced marriage," I responded almost immediately. "It''s about living a life I don''t want to live. If I return, I will have to be someone''s housewife, and that''s not the life I want to live."


    "So what? You think you can survive out here in the wilderness because you shot some rabbits?"


    I should have been more surprised by the fact that Varius knew my secret. But he had always been a cunning one.


    "I have been surviving, for months," I informed him and something cold shed over his eyes.


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    "And you think that''s enough?" Varius spat the words.


    "Yes," My eyes drifted to Riven. "I think it''s enough."


    "And when the beastes back to finish his job?" Varius asked.


    "It won''t," I said, even surprising myself with the amount of determination.


    Varius'' eyes darted between me and Riven a couple of times, and then he tightened the grip around his weapon and pointed it towards Riven again. I did say that he was one of the cunning ones, and it had only been a question of time before he''d figured it out. Still, I wasn''t prepared for the hatred that burned in his eyes as he red at Riven, and


    I found myself inching closer to the boy beside me.


    "You," Varius said with contempt in his voice. "You''re the monster."


    Riven said nothing, and it was the only confirmation he needed.


    "You took our mother from us, our father, and now you expect me to let you take my sister as well?"


    My mind drew a nk when I processed what Varius had just said.


    "Is dad?"


    Varius did not take his eyes off Riven as he answered. "He didn''t survive the throw through the wall. He died the same night."


    For a moment, I could not think. My father was dead. He''d died the same night I was taken trying to defend me. Looking up at Varius again I finally recognised the burning anger that was behind his eyes, because I had been staring at the same pair of eyes for as long as I could remember, in every reflection. Varius wasn''t just here to retrieve his little sister. He was here to retrieve his only living rtive. My younger self screamed about going home with our brother, so that we could spare him the pain of being alone. But it wasn''t just a choice between him and me. It was a choice about a life, and whether to live that life or to forever feel trapped. It was a choice about being me or being perfect. And I already knew that I couldn''t be perfect.


    I pressed a kiss on Nathan''s forehead and then ced him gently on the grass before I rose from where I''d been sitting. Varius and Riven were both watching me warily, and I knew that whatever I did next could determine everything. So I took my ce between the two, and once again faced the anger I had lived with for so long.


    "I can''t go back with you," I said again and Varius'' hard gaze flickered in hesitation. "I love you, Varius. And I loved our parents. But I can''t go back to you. The town will always be a home for me. But it holds no future. And I can''t live without


    it."


    "What makes you think that you have a future here?"


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    "I just know," I replied and behind, Riven grew perfectly still.


    Another wave of realisation washed over him.


    "You love him. You love the beast," He turned his gaze towards Riven. "What have you done to her? What kind of magic have you used to trap her here?!"


    "There''s no magic involved," I answered for Riven. "Varius, I''ve learned the truth. And you have to understand..."


    "Understand?!" Varius burst out in a mockingugh. "Understand?! He has murdered people. He killed our parents. And you think that I find it in me to understand your feelings for this man?!"


    "It''splicated," I tried but got nowhere.


    "No it''s not," Varius said. "And my sister would have agreed with me."


    The words were worse than a knife through the heart.


    "Varius..." I said slowly, a silent plea.


    "My sister would have taken every opportunity to kill the beast," Varius was looking at me with an expression I hadn''t seen directed towards me before. "You are not my sister."


    "Please," I said and took a step forward, but stopped when he aimed the gun at me instead.


    Riven instinctively took a step towards me as well, but I held him back with an outstretched arm. Tears were streaming down Varius'' face as he looked between us, and I wanted it all to be over. I didn''t want to hurt more people. But it seemed like the gods wouldn''t reply to this prayer either.


    "I will let you live," Varius said with a voice unlike his own. "I will let you have your life with him. But my sister died that night with my father. It was another life taken by the beast."


    "Varius..." I begged him silently but Varius was already turning his heel and heading towards the rope that should have been our way out.


    Instead, Varius left alone. And all I had left was the beast behind me.

 Epilogue: Two years later

    This summer had been warmer than thest, and we made sure to enjoy every piece of it, from the burning sun to the great variety of blossoming fruits and vegetables that were used for dinner. Riven particrly thrived in the sun, and whether it was because of how muchrger the de seemed when it was summer or because he just enjoyed the liberty of it was still a mystery to the world. I had once tried to pry an answer out of him. But all I got as a response was a silly metaphor about how he only danced when the flowers danced.


    And Nathan was just like his father.


    Only a year old and he was already running around on his tiny leg while he tried to grasp anything he could get his hands on. The colourfull flowers had been his favourites the first summer. He had held onto every single one of them until we had to pry them out of his grasp when he was asleep. Now, I would always find him running amongst the field of flowers, and sometimes even amongst the more colourful vegetables.


    His birth had been difficult. Mainly because we were alone but also because the nine months leading up to his birth had been a restricted life of adjustments and carefulness that I hadn''t been prepared for. Not when I''d just gotten the freedom to do whatever I wanted. But now, with Nathan in front of me healthy and strong, I knew that there wouldn''t be a single thing I wouldn''t go through just to have him safe by my side. He was a miracle, and a reminder that there was love for everyone.


    His full name is Nathan Theo Xavier Devalia, and it took us months to agree on the name. Mainly because we had only intended for him to have two names, but when the arguments got ridiculously heated (a part of it because of my pregnancy and another part because we are both stubborn souls), we settled with having all three names included. We had already decided that if we were going to have another boy, then he would be named after Riven''s father, whose name apparently was Rijon, and then after my brother. If a girl was born, I will try to name her after my mother, but that discussion hasn''t been brought up yet. All we knew was that we wanted another child, not only for our sake but for Nathan as well, and that with the way we were going, we would probably start trying sometime soon.


    When we first found out that I was pregnant, Riven had gone on a rampage in the woods. Not because he didn''t want a child. Only the gods knew how much he had craved for a family to care about, and a family that could care for him back. But Riven had always had an ounce of fear for himself, despite how many times I told him that I wouldn''t let him hurt me or our child. Riven had only started to believe me when we made it through the first full moon after finding out about my pregnancy, when the beast not only had kept his hands to himself, but spent the entire night hovering around me to keep me safe and warm. As if it knew that I needed the extra attention. It was a relief and an opening point for both of us when Riven transformed back with no new blood on his hands (except for a poor deer that became the prey for the night).


    The rope and the way out of the mountains still hung where Varius had left it. We had only used it once or twice since Nathan''s birth but I looked at it with hope. Because despite what my brother had said, he''d still left a way out for me. And with the hatred that had burned in his eyes that day, it had been more than what I could ask for.


    "Mama, Mama," Nathan cradled my leg when he finally reached me, and I looked down to see the crown of flowers that Riven made cover half his face.


    "Hello, love," I said as I lifted him into my embrace. "Where did your dad run off?"


    Nathan started waving his arms around in the air, as if to gesture where Riven had gone. But I didn''t need his directions when I felt a body press against my back and arms snake around my waist. The feeling of soft lips on my cheek caused my lips to quirk and when I turned to face him, he ced another kiss on my lips instead.


    "Hello, darlin"" Riven purred, using the nickname that had started as a joke but I''ve now grown fond of. "Here to get some sun?"


    I kissed him again for good measure and leaned into his embrace. Nathan was giggling from where he was in my arms and started grabbing for the flowers in Riven''s hair.


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    "I''m here to say that dinner is ready," I informed just as Nathan yanked in my hair. "But you both seemed so upied so I let you be."Published by N?v''elD/rama.Org.


    "Next time, you can join us," Riven said as he carefully pried Nathan''s fingers out of my hair. "It''ll be more fun that way."


    "Oh..." I cooed and looked at Nathan. "My boys can''t survive without me?"


    In a swift movement, Riven turned me around and ced Nathan between us. The child only seemed delighted to be between his parents, and giggled brightly when Riven tickled him under his ear. It was a sound I wanted to bottle up and save forever.


    "You know we can''t," Riven said after a heartbeat. "How would we survive?"


    At the softness of his voice, I peeked another kiss on his lips, and then one on Nathan''s forehead before he started sensing that the attention was shifting away from him.


    "As if I would let any of you two go on without me," I said as I looked down at Nathan''s bright green eyes. "You are unfortunately stuck with me forever."


    "Forever?" Riven echoed with a fond smile on his face.


    "Forever." I promised before we all headed towards our home.


    I had been able to look past the ugly and fallen in love with the beast. And in return, I had gotten a future. I sent a prayer to the gods, and echoed the promise I had made to the people in my heart. A promise of forever.


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