《i ACCIDENTALLY KILLED MY SUMMONER》


 Chapter 0

    Jude was logged out of the game along with everyone else huddling inside mechanical mech monsters arranged in a circle. The mechs that have been keeping him and everyone alive felt almost at this point like just playing another full dive game. Listening to the war stream, he along with everyone else was crying in absolute joy.


    Humans were winning. The strange technology and alien tactics that were seemingly nonsensical could not stand against the human technology. The aliens seemed to be under some type of curse that drained their ships if they got very far from their odd shield ships. The moment one of their ships would leave the field, it would go dim and in just a few short hours would go dark. After an alien ship goes dark, even if a group leads their shield ship close enough to envelope the darkened ship, it stayed dark. The aliens would use these ships as shields or projectiles until the nukes hit them causing them to vaporize rather than the shielded lighted ships, which was an effective strategy.


    The aliens failed to realize how many nukes we had and some of them could be stealthed and be absolutely massive in power. Measured in tonnage of TNT equivalent, the most massive blasts were in the10 to 20 Gigaton range which could throw the 100,000 ton ships around like dust in a heavy wind killing many directly even though their shields seem to hold. It is assumed the nukes cause blunt force damage on them smashing the crews inside, leaving their ships intact. Even so, the earth defenses took heavy damage on every insertion of the stealthed bombs.


    Some elite ships with elite crews were able to invade the enemy ships but were unable to capture or use any of them. The moment they left the range of a shield ship, all the interlocked writing script would darken leaving them with no power. Replicating the power source was beyond human understanding even though they have boarded multiple shield ships and attempted to understand it.


    Occasionally the human elites would come across a glowing gem or a crystalline layered latticework script that failed layer by layer until eventually the innermost layer would fail or the crystal would steadily darken. Some of the crystal structures could last days until the tiny spark at the center layer would finally go dark. If they got it close enough to an active shield ship, it would power back up, but again they were unable to utilize the power. Aliens would be incredibly strong when they had a charged gem or crystal lattice, but die in moments once the power faded.


    There appeared to be at least 3 different species in the force arrayed against them, all of them using the same script technology, and they would all die instantly once the scripts or crystals darkened. It was like they were robots losing their charge even though it has been verified they are completely biologic. Some of the aliens had replaced eyes, teeth, ears, noses or some other small part of their bodies with carved stones of various qualities, all having scripted interlocking runes on them. Some of the implants were incredibly detailed and almost lovingly installed into their hosts. Their was evidence that many of these aliens of all 3 species had these implants for almost their entire lives and some scientists suggested implantation from birth.


    The tactics changed once they realized that the shield ships were their power sources. They would not waste any of their shield piercing beam weapons on the bulk of the fleet, but just giving a path for the bombs. Once this tactic became prevalent, the alien fleets seemed to panic and started to flee except something intercepted the outer edge of those fleeing destroying them, causing the fleets to suddenly rush Earth directly.


    As Jude sat in his armor''s hulking monstrosity huddled around other identical mechs, the cavern they were in suddenly collapsed, while liquified watery sand suddenly drowned them all, not that it mattered. This has happened often enough they themselves were not even startled by the event. The suit''s AI would take over for a bit slowly melting the sand and stone in careful arcs until they could again be huddled together in a newly created cavern with slowly cooling superheated toxic gas. The suits would then begin altering the atmosphere in the cavern until it was perfect normal air. They would even add lights and carve ridiculous things like couches, windows and TV''s which would be augmented by their AI with a tv overlay, so when we looked at them it seemed like we were in a small house and could see "outside", sit on the comfortable couch and watch TV or play games. Even though it was all fake, we did acknowledge it helped our sanity a bit, removing the fact that we were miles underground and the surface of the earth was most likely superheated plasma when the hulking ships crashed onto it.


    The Earth was covered in what some termed a non-Newtonian field that was 100 miles thick reducing the debris speeds from interstellar to mundane. Even with that, having hundreds of millions of ships fall from the bottom of the Earth shield, picking up speed to terminal velocity before hitting randomly on the surface causing massive ripples in the toxic sludge that seemed to cover almost every square inch of the surface. At first there were incredible tsunamis and great ejecta from craters and awakened volcanoes, but once millions of ships landed in the oceans, displacing the water of the world upward to an average altitude of 15,000 feet, everything became a slurry of water that would be occasionally baked on the surface with superheated plasma before being churned up by the next impact and another tidal wave of sludge working its way through the massive bulks of the ships.


    Jude was thinking back about 5 months ago when all of humanity was "captured" by these AI controlled mechs causing mass confusion of the earth population because they were given no warning. Suddenly these armored suits dropped from the sky in the billions and diligently grabbed every human on earth including babies and infirm patients and inserted us all into a virtual reality. Apparently, all foretold paths forward in simulations showed a fatality of human populations on earth being at 99.99999% with only those in the most hardened extreme pressure bunkers deep in the earth having any chance. One woman in a meeting with the leaders of earth said, "Too bad you can''t just put everyone in a Mech Suit to survive the war." causing them to all look at each other and nod, "Why not?" Changing the simulation to include humanity in these powerful mech suits changed the survivability from basically 0 to around 99.8% survival probability.


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    Another odd thing about the mech suits was the mesh network virtual realities. We could choose to jack in and be back in an innocuously normal house and live life like seemingly normal. The main problem with this was that connectivity between all humans was basically impossible. The low-speed connections that could penetrate the earth to this depth let them sync their realities constantly, but every so often the AI filler would reach an odd uncanny valley where everyone still existed, but were not actually real people, but simulations of what the AI mesh thought they might be doing based on old actions. You would be going to school, yes, stupid school, in the virtual reality world and suddenly all your classmates would start behaving like scripted behavior, that sometimes took minutes to notice.


    The best things about the mech''s mesh virtual reality was always the games. You could for the first time in human history have "Full Dive" virtual reality games where you could be engaged in epic stories and build power and wealth like in many of the MMORPG games before the war, except it was SO REAL. Also there could be a time dilation effect to keep your attention so focused on these simulations that you would sometimes forget about your abysmal state.


    Funny enough, the medical capabilities of the suits were almost magical. As long as your head wasn''t crushed or vaporized, you could survive indefinitely. Many of the people with sicknesses were completely cured but of course now are suspended in nutrient solution like everyone else. As research is done somewhere, each update is pushed to all the Mechs eventually, constantly upgrading their capabilities. When we were all encased in the mechs originally, some of the features really sucked and the full immersion of the Virtual reality was rudimentary at best. But having the sum total of all of humanity working on the problems, quickly resolved them and the mechs internal 3d printers were upgraded to be able to make better 3d printers until we were all suddenly immortal as far as we could tell.


    Pets were also captured into the mechs, but depending on their size, they were sometimes attached as a blister on the outside on the back or belly. If the pet was small it was put inside the nutrient solution with you. The Virtual reality for the pets wasn''t a thing at all at the start, so they were put into suspended animation. Once the virtual reality system included the pets, somehow they figured out how to translate into your language what your pet was thinking, which is really weird and cool. You could quiet the words of the pet if it started to annoy you, but so many people enjoyed it so much they rejoiced. One guy in our group, Greg, did not have a pet, but now he has a cat stuck into his nutrien solution he named Morris. Apparently they AI in the mechs, if they had time would run around capturing all the stray animals and plopping them into random suits. Some through the remote mesh networks said they even had bears, alligators, snakes and other random wildlife attached in big metal blisters to their mechs, but no one in our group had anything like that except Greg with his new cat. We all did live in the heart of Los Angeles though and most of us had pets in our condo''s which were brought with us.


    The glitched radio was giving a play by play of action as it happened. Moments before we were all immersed in our VRMMO game named Virtual Earth when we received a message using the super low speed sonic communications that could penetrate deep into the real Earth.


    Honestly, everyone was getting a little lost on which reality was real. For some reason, the fidelity of the Virtual Earth simulation was improved to the point that it was more "real" than reality. It can be difficult to explain completely, but imagine if you went into a simulation and your eyesight was 10 times better than in reality. Your hearing was 9 times better than reality. You could smell 17 times better. You could feel pleasure or pain up to 28 times more intense, though most left it at 1 or 0.5. Colors were brighter. Your presence seemed more centered. You could feel what others were thinking and feeling to some extent, even though no-one knew exactly how this worked because they all agreed it was impossible.


    When you logged out of the Virtual Earth sim, and entered your nutrient solution with all it''s nightmarish tubes and in your constant drowning state or even remotely piloted your own mech carrying you, everything seemed less.


    I talked with a few of my friends in Virtual Earth school when they were not being simulated and a few actually were on the surface for some time and supposedly got out of their pods and walked around the floating cities they were in. They mentioned the colors were surreal and washed out compared to Virtual Earth. The blood red sky mixed with clear blue vistas as approaching shockwaves would have been awe inspiring before entering Virtual Earth. Afterward it was like blah.. Washed out. Boring.


    Also everyone''s minds were sped up to a minimum of 1.4 time normal in Virtual Earth, but in reality, it was just like lagging during a mesh reboot. It seems the consensus of all the programmers on Earth working with all the developing AI seemed to think this all made sense to keep people not only sane and surviving, but prosperous and striving to put their mark on the world.


    The radio was clipped but they repeated over and over, "We have won! We have won! We have won!..." The speaker broke down into sobs for all of humanity to hear the extreme joy in his voice.


    "Go to the surface and see for yourselves! The temperature is on average 72 degrees Fahrenheit be it equator or poles due to the shield leaching anything hotter. The air is still poisonous to breath, so bring an oxygen mask. Exposing your skin should be ok as long as you detoxify before re-entering your mechs within a few hours!" another radio host talked over his still overcome partner.


    I looked over at my mom and others smiling. We were going to the surface!

 1. Virtual Earth is my reality?

    "I, a grown man am actually crying. Everyone can see me cry, but no one seems to care. Some others were crying. Some were stunned. Others just carried on like they didn''t hear. Others were literally logged out of reality." Jude noted to LOG.


    "Damn, I can''t believe I''m actually following what that damn teacher''s direction and noting stuff to my log when I''m stressed out." Jude laments to himself.


    "Happy birthday Jude." My mom, Stephanie says with an odd wistful expression on her face. "Your 16 now! Almost a grown man!"


    Seriously! Was she reading my mind and had to naysay anything I even think about?


    Twitching my eye slightly, I argue. "Stephanie, I am a man by global law now."


    "What have I told you about calling me Stephanie! Call me mom please." Stephanie said in an irritated sing song like she has said a million times. It was like she just recorded that and pressed the ''play'' button at least once a day, almost like a ritual.


    "Be sure to log back into V E." Stephanie said, again seeming like just another recorded ingram she pressed ''play'' on.


    "Does my mom have any original thoughts at all, or is she just a set of pre-recorded meme''s randomly playing at set intervals?" Jude dismisses with annoyance. "I''ll log back in to V E right now. I can''t stand being out here anyway."


    "Yeah. It is really hard to believe this is our life now. How much we''ve lost and gained. I was planning on buying you a car for your 16th. We prepared the back house for you to live in for your privacy with even an alley entrance so you could sneak in your friends." Stephanie turned her mech and  looked over at her son''s pod with an odd expression. "Jude? You there?" No response. Sighing to herself she looked around the artificial space and logged back in to V E.


    Jude impatiently and mentally clicked the log in interface to Virtual Earth or V E. He needed to talk with his friend Bill to see how he and his family are taking the news of victory. Also his sister, Melody, which he has a huge crush on may have been a factor in his decision. Why does my mom have to be such a downer at a time like this. "Can''t she just be happy for once?"


    As the VE sync reaches 100%, his is now blurring into a scene with him walking a cat on the leash, he doesn''t recognize the neighborhood. The sun is bright and warm on his skin and he is wearing a death metal T-shirt and torn jeans with Air Jordan sneakers. All the houses are posh 3 story mansions in a cul de sac each with different fences or hedges created by the system based on some arbitrary traits by the households. To change anything, you actually had to hire some workmen to change it like real life, but unlike real life, the workmen played minigames to accomplish their tasks receiving instant rewards.


    "umm.. System, why am I walking a cat on a leash in an unknown neighborhood?" Pausing a moment he continues. "I don''t own a cat." He thinks of all the "I don''t own a cat" Video''s he''s seen online and smirks.


    A ghostly apparition appeared next to him, looking at him with intelligent piercing eyes. "Your simulacrum found a missing Cat that ran away and found out it belongs to a girl." Raising it''s eyebrows, it tilted it''s head knowingly widening it''s eyes slightly.


    Sniffing Jude says "You do god''s work, you know? Oh hey! What is the chance she will like me?"


    Straightening it''s features and giving uncanny inhuman attention suddenly the system apparition speaks. "You know I cannot give you projections on life experiences. This illusion of reality must be kept sacrosanct."


    Rolling his eyes, Jude shakes his head in exasperation making him slightly dizzy. "Then why do you keep mentioning the reality to me? You don''t ever talk like this to others."


    Continuing it''s unblinking stare, "You have never once lost yourself in this reality and treat it as a game, so it is actually detrimental to your sanity. You, in particular need grounding of what is real and not for a reason I cannot determin."


    Thinking hard, Jude materializes a fireball in his hand, holding it up to the system. "This. Is. A. Game."


    "From your perspective it is indeed a simulation. Even though your eyesight, taste, smell and other senses are much more high definition than reality itself. If the simulation is more real than reality in all your senses, which is the true reality?" The system avatar was purposefully robotic in appearance as an English''s butler as Jude lazily chose the default setting when first choosing to manifest him.


    "Right now, if someone else comes over and starts talking to me when I''m talking to you, what will they see?" Jude decides to be argumentative today.


    "They would see you give them attention based on your normal interactions. They would not hear nor see you interact with the system, but your simulacrum would interact with them with near 100% accuracy on how you would act."


    "So everyone around me could be checking their messages or watching Netflix or even take a nap, and you believe I wouldn''t know the difference?"


    "You do in fact have the uncanny ability to know when you are talking with a simulacrum. It is very disconcerting to the system administrators."


    Reaching down, Jude picks up the cat which starts to struggle, obviously not liking to be carried. "Is this cat real?" Jude starts to run in the direction of the map location he calls up.


    Appearing to scramble to keep up, the system Avatar turns creepy smooth while running and appears to speak normally. "Yes. This cat is currently in an attached pod to the young girl your are going to visit. You accepted a system generated quest to return the cat."


    Waving his hand disinterestedly, he continues to run in silence as the Cat becomes more distressed.


    Seeing the house number matching the one on the map, he turns to give it a once over. it is a 4 story mansion with dinosaur shaped hedges and a huge tree house visible above them in the back yard. Obvious indications that this house has a few children "living" here. Passing the child safety shield surrounding the property, Jude approaches the front door.


    Quest "Return the cat". Objective 1 of 3 completed. Bring the missing cat back to its home. Objective 2. Return the cat to the owner.


    Sighing, Jude steps up the grand stairs to the main double door entry and says, "Please announce my arrival with the cat." Rolling his eyes at not being able to ring a doorbell or even knock on the door in this stupid system, he stoically waits the entire extra second wasted.


    A nanny arrives. "Hello Jude. Please enter so you can meet Jamie." Jude sees the artificial life behind the dead eyes of the nanny bot and ignores it.


    While wondering if Jamie is a girl or boy name, he enters the grand foyer and keeps a firm hold the the cat which started mewling loudly now that it recognizes its home.


    Too bad she isn''t named Jamia or Jameoto or something to give away the gender for sure or what gender they currently might identify as. Maybe Jamie is a gender neutral name?


    Hearing a screeching high pitch voice, a girl his own age runs up and grabs the cat to its immense horror. "Whiskers! I missed you!"


    Squeezing it even harder while swinging it around, the cat met Jude''s eyes for a moment in hope for rescue. Jude averted his eyes while thinking, "Sorry dude. Is your lot in life."


    Noticing Jude again, Jamie gives him a quick hug squishing the cat between them for a horrifying second. Jude''s right eye starts to twitch.


    Objective 2 completed. Objective 3, gain the reward.


    Jude bows his head slightly in acknowledgement. "Cool. Nice to meet you Jamie. Nice treehouse you have in the back."


    Jamie beams, "Daddy had it made. The workmen let me play minigames helping them complete their quest. It was so fun! I didn''t realize I let out whiskers. You are the first person to see it. I have your reward. Follow me." She said it so fast and started to walk away, it took Jude a moment to realize the conversation ended and he was supposed to be moving.


    With the twitch in his eye becoming more pronounced, Jude followed the energetic girl.


    "Daddy! I''m completing the quest! Do you have his reward ready?"


    Opening his eyes in shock, Jude looks at the man questioningly. Could they actually provide the reward outside of the system?


    A small cardboard box is presented.


    Objective 3 completed. Custom reward. 1 Maine Coon kitten. 42 copper coins deposited. See attached increases in reputation.


    Jamie yanks the kitten jarringly out of the box and presents it forcefully into Jude''s hands. Beaming fervently, Jamie screeches loudly, "Isn''t she adorable! What will you name her?"


    Jude, not really knowing what to say, smiles with a horribly twitching eye. "System. Why the fuck is my eye twitching?"


    His simulacrum took over and thanked her graciously for the kitten inviting her to please keep in touch.  Bowing sarcastically and over the top as he turned to leave.


    "Your eye is twitching in real life and is being represented here."


    Jamie escorted Jude''s simulacrum to the door and saw him out.


    "Why the fuck is my eye twitching in real life? Am I having a stroke or something."


    "You appear to be annoyed at the simulation today more than usual."


    "I guess. Can you make it stop?"


    "Administering micro muscle relaxants to the area and massaging your brain with overlapping sound waves to increase circulation."


    The twitching slowed noticeably.


    "Can you teleport me to school?"


    "This is the 4,821st time you have requested to be teleported and you are being told for the 4,821st time the simulation does not allow this due to immersion inconsistency."


    "Yea, yea." Thinking of the map to school with ETA, Jude starts the 9 minute walk.


    Looking around at the vibrant world around him, he sees various people coming or going. Birds are flying around. Insects are making noises. A few dogs are barking. A kitten is trying to escape his grasp.


    Looking down with wide eyes, "Oh yea. I now have a cat." Adjusting his hold on the kitten, he moved it to his shoulder holding it reassuringly with his right hand.


    Sighing, he just looks around absorbing in the world around him, trying with his entire being to believe it is real, if even for a moment. Thinking of his friends at school, he has a stab of jealousy real intense that they seem to completely lose themselves in this virtual world.


    "Jude, why did you disengage from the conversation with Jamie?" The system avatar asked seemingly aloof.


    Jude stopped and looked at the System avatar.  His new un named cat also seemed to look at the avatar, "Could it see it also?"


    Focusing again on the System, he said succinctly. "What soever do you mean A.I.?"


    "It is unhealthy mentally to disengage from conversations abruptly.  That was a real human being that hasn''t met many people outside of school.  She was genuinely hoping for you to be her friend.  Because you live so close to each other in VE and your bunker''s are in transmission range, it would be idea for her and you both."


    "Why the abrupt change in policy for friends?"


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    "You are officially an adult in the V.E. system and your body in real life has started to reach puberty.  Meeting the opposite gender and making new friends is much more important to you socially and psychologically."


    Blushing slightly, Jude waves off the A.I.


    "I hardly call where I live in real life a bunker.  It was rebuilt just last week since that last shockwave collapsed it."


    "The illusion of having something recognizable to return to outside of the system gives much comfort to everyone.  Logging out and seeing an orderly clean room with artistic carvings and furniture is a must for all humans and is part of the charter."


    Smirking to himself that he distracted the System from pursuing the embarrassing subject, he continued. "The air is toxic and at 4 times surface pressure.  Sometimes it has a color to it.  I can only ''see'' what is in the bunker due to ''looking'' out of the Mech''s sensors and cameras."


    "It is suggested to most that they turn on the environmental filters so the ''windows'' show a beautiful naturalistic scene from ''outside'' which will filter out any color aberrations due to the toxic atmosphere."


    "So we end right back in V E?"


    "Reality augmentation is completely different from Virtual Reality."


    A kitten suddenly mewed into his right ear loudly causing Jude to flinch. "Ok I''m naming you MewMew."


    Seeing the street Stone Ave. leading toward the school in the distance, Jude decided to see if there was something he could do for the kitten.  "System, where can I find food for this cat?"


    "The kitten is not yet weaned from it''s mother and only recently was integrated into the V E system within the pod housing the entire litter.  It will need a bottle with kitten food supplements at a pet store near Amphitheater High School.  A mini-quest has been initiated."


    "You are seriously going to make me buy virtual food for the kitten before you will let it suckle its own mother?" Jude exclaims incredulously.


    "The kitten will not come to any harm even should you fail the quest.  It would be fed intravenously which even though it would provide all the nutrition it needs, it would be left feeling hungry and anxious.  Because you have accepted ownership of MewMew, there are real world consequences for your actions."


    Calls his friend Bill.


    Meets bill at pet shop on Stone Ave. buys a few milk bottles.


    Goes to home room and starts feeding the kitten to his chagrin it make noises.


    A system anouncement tells everyone that their mechs will travel to the surface of earth for everyone to log out and join the celebration.  The world''s first victory celebration.


    Jude logs out early and see''s his mech has formed somewhere in the middle of a worm like construct tunneling through the earth with nothing much to see.


    Reality has become. Jude had tears were in his eyes because the victory seemed impossibly surreal. He still couldn''t believe it and was waiting for the other shoe to drop. Any good news has seemed fleeting.


    People were coming out of holes in the ground after tunneling up from the bunkers.   Without their armor to look up at the hellish landscape of the surface people were constantly rubbing their eyes like they were trying to get rid of something blurry. The megalithic forms of the crashed alien ships were like mountains and moons reaching up into and past the upper atmosphere and blocking direct sunlight. Even so, they came out to chance a look at the real sky.


    Jude was with a group of mechs with people 100 strong including his mother in various stages if exiting their pods. We were all spreading out to gaze out at the surreal glow of the earth''s inner shield grid that could slow, but not stop the ships from crashing into the surface. "At lease the surface of the earth isn''t covered in radioactive rock vapor at 30,000 psi today", he thinks to himself.  Weather has a new meaning during war at this level.


    Staying within range of a man who stayed in his mech armor, but exposing a small radio, Jude approached his mom. Listening intently to the static, hoping to gleam some news he came to a stop looking his mom in her eyes as both their eyes grew in surprise. The message overheard from the radio"... Supernova weapon... " followed by static then "... the moon is breaking up..".


    Incredulously, he looked up and indeed the moon had cracks and debris seemed to be coming from it like an odd hatching egg.


    "What the hell does the moon breaking up have to do with a supernova weapon? "Jude ponders aloud. He was well beyond war weary and was trying to keep his mood light facing his imminent death with humor.


    Suddenly everyone was frozen because something is looking into their very being, to the core of their souls. All sound stops. Even as the feeling seems to change its focus away.


    Jude was wide eyed with his mouth agape, looking at everyone else doing the same.


    "Seriously?" he yells at the heavens.


    An explosion happens distorting space as an expanding shockwave originating from the moon.  The moon seems to implode a little with gas and dust being expelled from the cracks as the moon starts to slowly rotate. Before anyone can get a good look at it, the dust in the shockwave obscures the moon from their sight.


    Again, the radio makes another static before he heard "... something just destroyed the weapons and left the solar system... we think?"


    Some started to cheer but a sudden disquiet overcame us all. Staring in shock at those around, Jude felt pressure welling up inside of him. It felt so amazing like he''s been set free for the first time in his life. The power grew until it felt like he was full.


    Then it kept going. His head started to hurt. Everyone around him started screaming in horror and pain as the power and pressure kept ramping up feeling like something was burning. And still it kept increasing, faster and faster. Jude smelled smoldering iron and grapefruit as his hands went to his head. "Yea! I see! Thanks god!" He flipped off the heavens.


    A blue screen snapped into place in the middle of my vision playing what looked like a YouTube video of a man bowing on his knees. "I have forcibly added every lifeform including humans to a system I have developed, stolen from every game and book humans have ever conceived. Also, the Cultural Starship program was integrated and upgraded. Please forgive me but to save humanity, this was the only way. "


    As the pain subsided and an energy shield seemed to envelope his body and sink into his skin.  Also, runes started to scribe themselves under his feet. He looked around to see if everyone had runes under their feet, but of the hundred in easy view, not one had glowing runes at their feet.


    Locking eyes with his mother, he started to say. "Um..."


    The runes flared and Jude found himself in front of a small 2 foot tall, robed alien monster pointing toward a bunch of attacking small lizards.


    One of the lizards ran toward him and bit him on his leg.


    "Ow you little fucker!" He grabbed it and quickly squeezed it to death, then grabbed, squeezed, kicked and stomped to death the other 30 or so lizards.


    Covered in gross guts and blood from those annoying lizards he turned to the group of aliens questioningly.


    "Hello?"


    The alien monstrosity with the robe raised his hands, shaking in fear and started chanting, causing runes to start to form under Jude''s feet again. This time he could feel the energy coalescing both here and elsewhere.


    He couldn''t help it, he tried to feel the power and something within himself connected to it.


    Then the mage popped like a rotten melon with a huge firecracker stuck inside it.


    Covered in even more gore now with an open gaping mouth, Jude turned in shock and looked at the other small beings of this group. As one they all started making odd noises as they threw down their weapons and ran as fast as they could away.


    Still in shock he started spitting while wiping his face on his bloody sleeves and blowing his nose to get the mess cleaned out. Gagging, he threw up his algae lunch then sat down feeling dizzy.


    Taking off his outer shirt, he found the back side of it was relatively clean and used it to clean his face much more effectively.


    "What the fuck man!", he screamed at nothing and no one.


    Noticing an icon at the edge of his vision he tried to look at it and it popped up in his vision.


    It looked like a game battle log.


    You have killed an unknown entity causing 132 damage gripping damage out of probable 30 hp. Naming entity "small green lizard" until further notice.


    You have killed small green lizard with 256 throwing damage out of 31 hp. You have caused 417 damage to small green lizard corpse. Small green lizard corpse has been converted into lizard goo a possible alchemical ingredient.


    You have killed a small green lizard with 95 gripping damage out of 29 hp. You have destroyed small green lizard corpse with 217 throwing damage. You have cause 318 damage to destroyed small green lizard corpse causing it to turn into lizard goo a possible alchemical ingredient.


    Impatiently trying to scroll down, the view changed into quick summaries by category showing 34 killed small green lizards.


    Banishment spell has caused backlash with 1087 spell points out of 15 spell points causing mana detonation in your summoner.


    Unknown effect on faction reputation.


    Extreme fear has affected all those around you causing them to flee for their lives. Unknown effect on faction reputation.


    Total XP toward level 1: 179 out of 4000. 27000 xp banked and being assimilated at current rate of 1 xp per minute.


    You have heard a new language. You are the first human to ever experience this language and will be granted an unknown boon upon reaching level 1.


    You have learned a new attack. Grip attack. Using unparalleled strength, you obliterate your foes by grabbing and squeezing with extreme force.


    Your grip attack is rated at level 18 at assumed exponential progression based on the assumption the lizards are level 1 with 30 hit points.


    You have learned a new attack. Throw attack. Using unparalleled strength and speed, you obliterate your foes by flinging them with ease at any nearby hard surface.


    Your throw attack is rated at level 23.


    You have learned a new attack. Stomp attack. Using unparalleled strength, you obliterate your foes by stomping them into goo creating quick alchemical solutions that would otherwise require a mortal and pestle.


    You have been attacked with a banishment spell. Effect has been resisted.


    You have learned a new attack. Mana detonation. Using an incredible amount of mana, you injected over 72 times the amount needed to cancel the spell causing the enemy to detonate with 3261 hp damage.


    You have attacked a group of adventurers with an area effect spell Mana Detonation, causing them to go deaf as well as 10 hp of stun damage out of estimated 50 hp.


    Permanent reputation loss with 4 adventurers from neutral to slightly negative for killing a member of their group


    .


    You have gained fame. Using overwhelming power in front of beginning adventurers and allowing them to live has started the slow progression of fame throughout the lands. Fame is only transferred by tales told from one person to the next unless encountering a competing gamification or network system.


    You are considered a monster in this world. Any known system in place is incompatible with the human adventuring system and will have unforeseen effects on someone already a member of the competing system.


    Passive effects: Extreme mana burn. System regeneration. Banking XP. Dirty. Wet. Hungry. Thirsty. Nauseated. Low Gravity. High oxygen.


    Active effects: System attempts to burn excess mana: Shoddy mana Shield. Shoddy regeneration enhancement. Shoddy Iron skin. Shoddy Protection from evil. Shoddy Bless. Shoddy Bleed mana. Shoddy Detect evil. Shoddy Enhanced strength. Shoddy Enhanced Perception. Shoddy Enhanced intelligence. Shoddy Enhanced Dexterity. Shoddy Enhanced Stamina. Shoddy Mana to health buff. Shoddy Imbue bones. Shoddy Imbue blood. Shoddy Imbue flesh. Shoddy Cleanse blood. Shoddy Cleanse lymphatic system. Shoddy Invisible orbs: fire, water, wind, earth.


    Cores: Forming. Dimensional storage 19 foot diameter.


    Jude sits still while reading this for some time, while trying to wrap his mind around it.


    Out loud Jude says, "This system is just making shit up!"


    Covering his face in despair, he yells into his hands muffling his scream. "It doesn''t know what the fuck is going on any more than I do!"


    A new system message icon appears at the top right of his vision.


    Despondent, he doesn''t think about it for some time just sitting, covering his face, hoping this is just some weird nightmare. Remembering how many times over that last 6 months of the invasion of earth he has done the same to no avail, he rubs his face vigorously and gets up.


    Thinking of the new icon in the top right of his vision, it pops up in his vision like a virtual screen like before but now he is paying more attention. The virtual screen is actually a monitor with the brand name "Generico" with a missing pixel in the middle and is slightly cutting off the words on the left side of the longer sentences making him half chuckle.


    The text in the middle of the screen. The Human Adventuring System is completely customizable. Benefits of the Human Adventuring System:


    Photographic system memory. Advanced prediction algorithms. Instant sharing of information of system information between all system installations. Instant communication between all humans. Instant access to internet experienced by all humans. If desired, gamification system allows direction and paths to follow in any circumstance to keep morale maximized. Spam and junk filters utilize advance AI to filter. Personal assistant accessible and customizable to help through any situation if desired. More features upon request.


    Jude is dumfounded. It can''t be that easy, could it?


    "Call my mom." Jude says hoarsely.


    Message appears on the virtual monitor. "Calling Stephanie R. Hale" Added Stephanie R. Hale to primary contact list as "Mom".


    Jude''s mom appears on the virtual monitor saying tentatively "Hello?"


    Gasping in disbelief, as a half sob, Jude says, "Hi mom! I''m alive!"


    Stephanie''s expression turns from slightly worried to more worried as she asks. "Do you have blood in your hair? Are you in a cave? Are you OK?!!"


    "Mom, don''t panic, ok. I think I''ve been summoned off earth by some type of mage that.. um.. wasn''t able to send me back??" Still shocked by this weird development, Jude is at a loss for words for a second. I''ve never heard of an isekai hero being able to call home, this is so surreal.


    Stephanie says sternly. "We will figure out a way to get you back. Everything is so odd her right now though. It is like everyone just got superpowers through some weird system to keep us from exploding or turning into mindless exploded flesh abominations."


    "So no one else got summoned like me?" Jude asks, fearing the answer either positive or negative.


    Stephanie sighs, then says. "Not that I know of honey. It must have just been bad luck on your part. Whatever happened here changed everything. We don''t yet know what is going on, but they are calling it ''The Curse''." Pausing a second before continuing, Stephanie seems to look him right in his eyes. "Just try to stay safe where you are. I''m going to ask around to try and figure out how to get you back."


    "Ow! " Looking down another one of those little lizards bit Jude on his leg. "Not these little farts again! One second mom, I need to murder a bunch of lizards." Looking toward the darker section of the cave he was in he sees a few lizards heading toward him. Looking up at the ceiling with glowing fungus he murmurs, "Huh. I am in a cave I guess."


    Jude gets up and quickly gathers lizards into a pile, killing all but one and holding the last one to examine.


    While doing so, he didn''t notice Stephanie calling her survivor group leader James and he was conferenced in with Jude and his mom adding another window off the side. Changing his focus for a second, Jude centers the leader''s video then his mom''s then sporadically moves them around with his mind somehow. Once he gets them where he wants them by willing it he stops and actually pays attention to them.


    So caught up in this strange interface he failed to hear James last question. "Uh what? Say again?"


    James repeats, "You are not on earth?" with a slightly hysterical undertone.


    Leaving the pile of lizards behind, he says "I don''t think so. Let me look outside." Jude starts walking toward the light area where the exceedingly slow monster adventurers ''ran'' away. "The gravity is low here, so I''m assuming this isn''t Earth. Walking makes me feel like I''m in a bouncy castle, I''m still getting the hang of it."


    "Can you see what I see?" Jude asks after a second. Thinking about it, both his mom and group leader flinch slightly as they both reply in the affirmative.


    "Did a bomb go off?" Stephanie exclaims.


    "I''ll tell you later mom. Just give me a minute." James begins to think this instant communication thing could end up being a hassle. Maybe I could assign my personal assistant to screen my calls or tell them I''m busy? He snickers at the thought.


    Approaching the entrance to the huge cave, he his blinded. Walking further into the light he waits for his vision to acclimate before he notices the barricade with mounted troops all focused on him.


    "Oh.. Shit.. Um mom, I''ll call you back."

 2. Im not a monster, I Swear!

    Jude is looking out at a poorly constructed barricade that looks like turned over small carts and wagons with a seeming random assortment of crab, insect, lizard and octopus people riding what looks like many legged trees. Beyond the 15 beings and their mounts, there appears to be a medieval town with 4 foot walls. The town has smoke like any old human town like he has seen on tv.


    Walking really slowly, Jude raises his hands. Everyone appears to look at him and then they focus on his right hand.


    Looking at his own right hand he sees a wiggling green lizard that he forgot he captured.


    What seems like slow motion, the octopus person on his tree steed animatedly points at him and gurgles something at those around him.


    Trying to understand the reaction of the "People?" around him, he starts to lower his hands and starts to try and bite his fingernails until he remembers the green lizard. Thinking to himself, "I should sell green lizards as a solution to stop bad habits." Trying not to smile at his own errant though, he gently floats the lizard over his shoulder back toward the cave behind him with a light toss.


    As soon as the lizard touches the ground, it immediately runs back straight for him. It jumps into the air.. Slowly.. And floats towards Jude''s legs with it''s tiny mouth open to commence with it''s slightly annoying pinch attack.


    Jude kicks it and the lizard explodes creating a cloud of lizard giblets.


    "Of course, it exploded." He mutters in exasperation. Turning back to focus on the Octopus dude in front of him, he says. "No one else explode or attack me please!" He then smiles at them which causes them all to immediately dive behind the barricades, some being thrown off of their tree steeds. ? Streeds? Sure, Sure streeds it is.


    The streeds are running around fleeing as fast as they can. Some of them running into each other or carts or trees in their panic. One of the things seems to have just passed out and is laying still on it''s side. Do they breathe? He can''t see it breathe.


    Scratching his head in consternation, Jude just stands there for a full minute.


    "Honey, I think you scared them."


    "What! I thought I hung up." Focusing on his floating screens, he sees James and his mom both intently focusing on him, apparently still there.


    "Ugggg!" Oh yea, "Personal Assistant?"


    A calm female voice says, "What would you like?"


    "Hang up on all my calls."


    "Now wait a s.." Stephanie starts to complain before being cut off.


    "Stream a video to my mom in case I die, so she knows what happened." Jude commands. To himself he thinks, "Let her nag my stream. I wonder if I''ll get a lot of views, likes and comments."


    "Yes Master Jude." says the voice making Jude a little uncomfortable being called master.


    "No more ''master'' please." Jude commands again. That''s all he needs right now is to become a pretentious prick.


    Focusing back to the forces arrayed in front of him, he says. "I am not a monster, I swear!"


    No one reacts. Thinking to himself, "Duh! Of course they don''t understand me."


    More forces were slowly coming out of the town with the short walls but staying farther back.


    Feeling a little antsy in the low gravity, he decides to sit rather than bounce around on his slightest movement. The ground is quite comfortable.


    One of the insect creatures throws a bottle at him. Looking the slowly moving bottle he wonders what it is. Maybe they know he is thirsty?


    When the bottle gets within range he rolls over a bit an reaches out and casually grabs it out of the air being careful not to break it. There is a cork stopper in the top of the bottle that looks kind of like a potion bottle in a VR game he used to play before things got weird on Earth.


    Pulling the cork out, he sniffs the liquid. It smells like lemon water like when you would go to a restaurant, and they would cut lemon slices on the side of the water glass before serving.


    If you encounter this tale on Amazon, note that it''s taken without the author''s consent. Report it.


    Putting a little drop on his tongue, it tastes kind of like lemon water but a little off. Shrugging his shoulders, he takes a sip before just upending the bottle and drinking the entire thing.


    Looking up, he waves the empty bottle thankfully at the Grasshopper dude.


    Everyone went completely still. The octopus guy hissed something at the grasshopper dude and it seemed as if the eyes were bugging out while he turned even slower than normal to stare at the octopus guy.


    Jude had no idea what was going on and why they were all taking things so slow. He thought for sure he would be dragged to some dungeon somewhere and tortured and dissected, but these guys seem like they don''t know what they are doing any more than I do.


    It has been 15 minutes since he sat down and Jude was starting to get bored. Absently digging into the ground, he finds little rocks and crushes them with little popping noises. It feels like popping bubble wrap. Maybe the lower gravity made the rocks form less dense?


    Yawning, he wonders if he should just lay down and take a nap when the octopus guy burbles to the grasshopper guy. Causing the grasshopper guy to stare at the octopus guy again.


    The personal assistant voice speaks up. "Would you like to hear an attempt at translation? It will be very inaccurate but as they talk more, the certainty will start to increase accordingly."


    "Sure?" Jude answers causing the beings to flinch and turn towards him again.


    The octopus guy started hiss burbling at the grasshopper again. This time there was voices overlaid.


    Octopus "I said go over and try to talk to it. You threw the ???bomb???. If he starts killing everyone, I''m going to make sure you are the first one he goes for."


    Grasshopper. "You can''t be serious! He showed his teeth in an aggressive display when trying to talk earlier."


    Octopus: "Go now or I ??swear?? I will clip your ??arms/legs/feet?? and drag you out there as an offering."


    A crab person in the back speaks up. "Be careful not to get too close. It has so much power pouring off of it you might get ether poisoning. Stay at least 12 ??measurement?? from it."


    Grasshopper: "Cant we just wait for ??phrase?? to get here? They should be strong enough to kill it for sure."


    Octopus: "Why do you think we are trying to delay it! Go and try and talk to it now!"


    The grasshopper guy gets out from behind the cart with 2 of its appendages holding on as if to pull itself back into hiding. When nothing happens for about 2 minutes, it cautiously starts to move toward him.


    Jude is still trying very hard to not get bored. They are moving so slow and taking at least 3 times as long to do things as a normal person which is starting to get on his nerves.


    "Hello? I don''t intend to try and hurt anyone. I''m trying to get back home. Can you understand me?" Jude winces at his own jumbled attempt at speech.


    Upon starting to speak, the Grasshopper appears to want to flee in terror but when Jude makes no movement to chase it, it turns back to face him squarely.


    The grasshopper starts to click, burble and hiss whereupon a voice overlays. "Hi! My name is ??indecipherable?? assigned as ''Jumpy'' ". This causes Jude to almost laugh out loud at the pithy personal assistant''s choice of name. Being careful not to show his teeth, he schools his facial expressions as best he can and continues to listen. "Why are you here out of the ??cave/dungeon?? ??death?? level?"


    "Can I speak to him in his own language?" Jude asks his personal assistant?


    "No. You have no capability to mimic those sounds".


    "Damn!" Jude huffs. "Wait! It is a system that got installed by that dude back on earth, so maybe the system could be installed on the bug dude." Jude thinks excitedly.


    "Could you install the system on the grasshopper guy so we could talk?"


    On the faux monitor a message pops up. System infection routine started. .. ... Completed.


    The bug flinches and fell over and started to writhe in pain and terror.


    The crab person in the back yells clicks and hisses. "He must have gotten ether poisoning at that distance! He is 15 "Measurement" (system defines 15 hands as measurement). My god in space! What a monster!"


    The grasshopper got back to its legs seeming stunned and eyes wide.


    "Can you understand me?" Jude murmurs slowly.


    The Grasshopper guy says, "Yes! I can." Taking about another 2 minutes to compose himself the grasshopper starts again. My name is Jumpy. Nice to meet you dungeon boss. Why have you left your dungeon? Aren''t you feeling like dying for leaving it?"


    "I''m not from the dungeon. I was summoned by a .. um Mage? that.. um .. died." Jude attempts to explain haltingly.


    Jumpy seems to leak air with his mandibles wide. It turned to look at the Octopus guy and spoke. "He says he is not a dungeon boss. I think he says he was summoned, and the summoner died."


    "Name the octopus guy Squiggles and the crab person "Pinchy" Jude says out loud as he smirks to himself.


    "Noted" the personal assistant says.


    "You want the names of %indecipherable%?" Jumpy asks, turning its head slightly.


    "Sorry, I guess you aren''t an NPC in a game. Just forget what I said." Jude rolls his eyes slightly.


    The octopus guy , Squiggles says, "What is it saying? How are you understanding it?"


    Jumpy still frozen in indecision eventually "turns to Squiggles and says, " It wants to play a game of forgetting letters. I''m thinking the words are not translating properly."


    Jude slaps his forehead and shakes his head slowly in misery, causing Jumpy to fall forward in a crouch and flexing his legs to jump away.


    Squiggles yells back toward the large group. "Someone get a translation rune!"


    The group looks at themselves before one says "I''ll go" and races slowly back toward the 2 foot tall gate to enter the town.


    "I guess that gate may be big enough to stop the lizards", Jude thinks. Some of these ''people'' are large enough to just step over the gate. "Maybe they have puppies in there they don''t want getting out?" he continues the thought.


    Awkwardly, Jumpy starts to relax and asks, "Why did you attack yourself?"


    Startled, Jude remembers there is a dog sized sentient grasshopper named Jumpy 10 feet from him.


    "That wasn''t an attack. I was just expressing frustration our translation sucks."


    Turning it''s head, Jumpy''s mandibles open as if to say something, pauses, then just shuts them. Starting again it says, "We should wait for the translation rune because it just translated that .. badly.. "