《Our Stage [BL]》


 Chapter One

    When David Benton was five years old, he had it in his mind that he was going to be a rock star, something between Freddy Mercury and Billy Joel. He spent all his spare time on music, practicing his singing and songwriting. When he was in kindergarten, David received an award for his original song ¡°Attacus Atlas.¡± His parents had been so proud that they¡¯d hung it up on the fridge for a month before David decided to put it to better use.


    At the time, the series Starfly, loosely based off of the cult classic, Shadows of Earth, had been airing worldwide. David had been completely enamored with the youngest member of the cast, Louis Greene, controversially portraying Jason Oliver.


    Deciding that he could woo his potential friend with his award-winning lyrics, David had sent him a letter containing the poem about a kingfisher catching an atlas moth and devouring it.


    David¡¯s parents had warned him not to expect a response, so it has been a shock when Louis Greene decided to write back. In hindsight, the letter was completely understandable, but it had been devastating at the time. Louis had told him what he now knew very well: That his writing sucked.


    Though his response had gone something like this, ¡°Your effort in writing me is appreciated, but your lyrics need work. Perhaps you should choose an alternative profession,¡± the letter had been signed cordially¡ªnot that David had known what that meant¡ªbut in that single instant, it was as if David¡¯s dreams had all fallen through.


    And now it was happening again.


    At the time David thought the song was an explanation of the southeastern Asian ecosystem.


    Now, he thought it more a metaphor for life. No matter how big you were, there¡¯s always something bigger out there to eat you.


    Apparently, David would forever be a moth. No matter how big and impressive, a moth was still a moth.


    David had been called back for auditions to Rift Valley but now he was sitting in the lobby with a handful of other actors around his age, around his build, and with much stronger credentials, and he was pretty sure he wasn¡¯t going to get the job. He always got the same feeling of foreboding sitting among them, like a ball of mud amidst a selection of truffles. Even if he nailed the audition, he knew his chances were slim.


    When he first auditioned for this role, he¡¯d been filled with confidence. But now that he was here, he saw the looks he was getting and he was pretty sure he knew why.No one had watched it. It was infamously bad even before it had been released and there were screencaps making fun of it from day one. But everyone had heard of Lust Story, and, now, David couldn¡¯t seem to escape it.


    No one had watched it, but everyone had heard of Lust Story, and now David couldn¡¯t seem to escape it.


    Glancing around, David caught sight of the casting director exiting the audition room. All eyes turned expectantly toward the man as he held up a list.


    ¡°Thank you all for coming, we will be reviewing our notes and will call your agents within a week.¡±


    David let out a long breath, he thought the audition had gone fairly well, but his nerves were getting the better of him now and waiting never helped with that.


    *****


    It was beginning to smell like rain as David exited the building and he was glad he¡¯d thought to bring an umbrella. He didn¡¯t have any other plans for the rest of the day so he decided to make a stop at the Wisteria Cafe before heading back to his apartment.


    The Wisteria Cafe was one of the best joints in Weldstone Harbor. David had been living here for nearly three years, but he had yet to find a coffee shop quite as good as this one. The usual barista knew all of his customers by name and made the best mocha on the West Coast. David only came here once every couple weeks¡ªhe had to watch his figure, unfortunately¡ªbut it was well worth it every time he did.


    There were the regular faces and a couple new patrons, just like every other time he visited, and David walked right up to the counter. He ordered his drink and it came back to him in record time¡ªincluding a little caricature of him in place of his name on the cup. David chuckled at the exaggeratedly large eyes and pouting lips.


    He slid into his favorite booth, a tiny one tucked well out of the way but with a pretty good view of everyone else. He originally liked to sit closer to the window and door so he could see outside, but ever since the absolute failure of Lust Story, David had been more careful about being seen in public. He just hoped that he¡¯d get the part on Rift Valley so that he could get over his association with Lust Story as quickly as possible.


    It was humiliating enough being on a terrible paranormal romance, but to be on a terrible paranormal romance that even the people who enjoy terrible paranormal romance hated, well, that was just a whole new level of failure.


    Which was, actually, pretty on par with David¡¯s career in general.


    At this point, he was pretty sure that his dreams were all doomed to fail. Not even Jennifer, his best and most supportive friend, was particularly optimistic about David¡¯s ambitions. He just needed to catch one more break and he could turn this all around.


    What started out as a light drizzle outside was quickly becoming a downpour and two figures ducked into the caf¨¦ to escape the cold. David nearly choked on his mocha when he recognized the man as the casting director he¡¯d just met. David didn¡¯t¡¯ know the woman with him, but they appeared to be discussing the auditions, and none too quietly, at that.


    If David took note of their words, well, he wasn¡¯t really eavesdropping as much as overhearing them. Their fault for speaking in such a public place.


    ¡°And then there was that kid,¡± the director said, ¡°the one from Lust Story.¡±


    ¡°Oh, no, you¡¯re kidding me,¡± the woman said, smothering her laughter with a hand.


    ¡°No, I¡¯m not. His audition was all right, but dear god, can you imagine if we hired him?¡± the director said. "What a PR nightmare."


    David¡¯s throat went dry.


    ¡°Then again,¡± the man continued, ¡°there¡¯s a chance the infamy could bump up viewership to Rift Valley.¡±


    ¡°Your ratings would drop by pure association,¡± the woman scoffed. ¡°I¡¯m not even sure how they made it past the pilot episode. How would you pitch it to the producers? You know Mrs. Steward is. She¡¯d never go for it.¡±


    ¡°You¡¯re right, of course,¡± the director said. ¡°It was just an idle thought.¡±


    David cringed, sinking down into his seat and praying to any deity that would listen that they didn¡¯t notice him sitting there. There was a fern in front of his booth, but it certainly didn¡¯t block him from view.


    Trying to give himself an out, David fumbled for his ear buds and phone. As he tugged the cord, trying to untangle it, his phone, still plugged into the other end, escaped from his pocket and clattered across the floor. Several people, including the casting director and the woman he was with, turned to stare at the commotion.


    This tale has been pilfered from Royal Road. If found on Amazon, kindly file a report.


    David bent over to retrieve the escaped phone, trying to tamp down on the flush of humiliation creeping up his neck. He straightened up with as much dignity as he could muster then caught the director¡¯s eyes. He gave the man a smile, doing his best impression of, ¡®oh, you¡¯re here, too.¡¯ The director smiled a little awkwardly at him but shook his hand as David made his way to the door.


    He was already half way down the block by the time he realized he left his umbrella sitting at the booth in the cafe. The rain had turned into a full blown storm by this point and David was soaked within seconds. That was probably the worst thing about living in Weldstone Harbor. There was just so much rain all the damn time. Not that David minded it on most days, he usually had an umbrella and wasn¡¯t in the midst of an inappropriately timed identity crisis.


    But he supposed that was that.


    Once again, he had been forced to the realization that this was not the job for him. He took some small comfort in the fact that they had said his acting hadn¡¯t been ¡®bad¡¯. . . But of course, if not bad, it was clearly not good enough to warrant giving him a chance.


    His apartment wasn¡¯t far from here, only four blocks down from Main Street, but the rain was strong and David wasn¡¯t dressed particularly warmly. Returning to the coffee shop to retrieve his umbrella wasn¡¯t an option, either, though. He wasn¡¯t sure his person, let alone his career, could handle any more humiliation.


    ¡°Why me?¡± David whined, tilting his head up to the down-pouring sky.


    David trudged back to his apartment, stopping at the door to take off his shoes so that he didn¡¯t track mud in. The apartment wasn¡¯t nice, exactly, he had never made enough for that, but it was, at the very least, clean. Jennifer liked to say he had a knack for minimalism, but David knew it was just that he couldn¡¯t afford more than the one piece of furniture.


    He took the term starving artist very seriously.


    If things didn¡¯t turn around quickly, though, he was going to just be starving and not an artist at all.


    Suddenly needing some sort of external source of perspective, David pulled his phone out of his pocket. The screen was damp from the rain and David wiped it on his shirt only to realize that his shirt was even soggier than his phone. Still dripping, David made his way to the bathroom to grab a towel and run a bath, hot as the ancient water heater could muster.


    Once he had stripped down and dried his phone on the hand towel, he slipped beneath the water. The burn was almost painful, but soothing at the same time against his chilled skin.


    David put the phone to his ear. ¡°Call Jennifer Yang,¡± he commanded the device. The phone asked which number he wanted and David just guessed. He could never remember which was her office phone and which was her cell and then there was one that she hadn¡¯t had since high school but was still in his phone. He¡¯d put all of them in as ¡°other,¡± and still hadn¡¯t fixed it.


    Whichever number he had dialed, Jennifer picked up. She didn¡¯t sound irritated, either, so it was probably the right one.


    ¡°David,¡± she said evenly. ¡°It¡¯s three in the afternoon. You realize I¡¯m at work, right?¡±


    Correction, she didn¡¯t sound too irritated.


    ¡°I know, but I needed to talk to you and if you were very busy, you wouldn¡¯t have answered,¡± he said. There was a pause.


    ¡°Are you talking a bath?¡± Jennifer asked. ¡°David, if you are really serious about acting, you should probably put more effort into actually finding work.¡±


    ¡°Shut up,¡± David said. ¡°It¡¯s been a bad day.¡±


    Jennifer made a humming noise that David interpreted as some sort of inquiry, or at least permission to continue.


    ¡°I went to callbacks,¡± he said. ¡°And they went great!¡±


    ¡°But you didn¡¯t get the job? Weren¡¯t callbacks just today? How do you already know?¡±


    ¡°I may have overheard something I wasn¡¯t supposed to.¡±


    ¡°Oh, so you overheard the director talking about how he murdered his father-in-law and now you can¡¯t take the job for fear of him coming after you next?¡±


    ¡°No, nothing¡¯s been murdered except my career,¡± David moaned, sinking as far into the water as he dared with his phone pressed against his ear.


    ¡°I thought you said it went well,¡± she said, starting to sound frustrated with him. Close as they had been for going on fifteen years, Jennifer was never very fond of emotional support.


    ¡°I did, but I¡¯ve already ruined my chances by acting in Lust Story! I overheard the casting director saying he didn¡¯t want to hire me because ratings would drop by association!¡±


    Jennifer made a choking noise, ¡°Well, I did warn you it was a shitty story. The novel was crap.¡±


    ¡°Yeah, but I thought that it might at least be somewhere to start making a name for myself!¡±


    ¡°And look at that, you¡¯ve made a name for yourself,¡± Jennifer said dryly. David glowered at the dripping faucet.


    ¡°I need your honest opinion,¡± David said more seriously.


    Jennifer let out a sigh. ¡°I never give you anything but my honest opinion,¡± she said. ¡°What do you want to know?¡±


    ¡°Am I a terrible actor? Do you think that it¡¯s silly for me to pursue this? Should I become a construction worker instead?¡±


    There was a moment of silence before Jennifer started snickering on the other end. ¡°You know, I think I¡¯ve told you before that your acting is good. But more to the point, there¡¯s no reason for you not to continue acting, David. Your parents are filthy rich and they do like you for some reason, so you don¡¯t actually have to make money to continue surviving. Take advantage of that privilege and call me back when you¡¯ve either succeeded or stopped being a trust fund baby.¡±


    ¡°Jennifer,¡± David said, ¡°that doesn¡¯t help.¡±


    ¡°Besides,¡± she said, ¡°You aren¡¯t qualified to be a construction worker. Their liability insurance isn¡¯t good enough to deal with your shit.¡±


    ¡°Thanks,¡± David said, half sarcastically, but half sincerely, too. Sometimes it was good to have an unbiased¡ªif tactless¡ªopinion to fall back on. ¡°But that still doesn¡¯t help me repair my ruined reputation.¡±


    ¡°Then I guess you¡¯ll have to find a rich nobleman that¡¯s willing to marry you despite the scandal,¡± she deadpanned.


    ¡°I need help,¡± David whined. There was a click, as though Jennifer was putting something down on her desk. David replayed the sound, trying to figure out if it was whatever she was working on or the phone. Because she¡¯d done both before.


    ¡°Then come visit me,¡± Jennifer said. David scrunched his nose. Jennifer was currently working on some top secret project¡ªthough how a visual effects company could have top secret projects, David did not know¡ªin the middle of nowhere. Some little place literally called Midtown, as though the thing itself was so small it didn¡¯t warrant its own name.


    ¡°I¡¯m not going to fly into the middle of nowhere just to come see you,¡± he said.


    ¡°You are, because I¡¯m a lot cheaper than therapy,¡± Jennifer said in a sing-song voice. David snorted.


    ¡°Sure, because the thing to do when I am so dirt poor that I can¡¯t even afford a couch is to buy a plane ticket to come visit you.¡±


    ¡°I¡¯ll lend you the money and you can pay me back with interest, or, better yet, you can go talk to your mom and she¡¯ll write you a check for free,¡± Jennifer said.


    ¡°I¡¯m not doing it. The whole point of moving here was to live independently,¡± David said.


    ¡°And you¡¯re terrible at it,¡± Jennifer reminded him, ¡°so either go visit your mom, or come visit me, but either way, you clearly need someone to smack some sense into you so you can get back to your life.¡±


    ¡°Why do you want me to visit anyway? You don¡¯t even like me,¡± he grumbled.


    ¡°Of course I like you,¡± Jennifer said, ¡°I¡¯ve put up with you since we were three.¡±


    ¡°Yeah, so you¡¯re really more like a sister. You can¡¯t get rid of me at this point.¡±


    ¡°David, stop fishing for compliments. Come visit because . . .¡± Jennifer paused.


    ¡°Your top secret project?¡± David sat up straighter. Jennifer was tight-lipped about her secrets, but on rare occasions, she¡¯d let David in on something juicy.


    ¡°You are sworn to absolute secrecy and if you say anything to anybody, I will castrate you, do you understand?¡± she said. David nodded vigorously before realizing she couldn¡¯t see him.


    ¡°Yes, sir,¡± he said, giving a salute that he hoped she could imagine over the phone.


    ¡°Well, without going into detail, there¡¯s a series running for Cybervid. And there are some pretty big names working here right now. It would be a good opportunity for you to at least do some networking.¡±


    ¡°Who¡¯s working on it?¡± he asked.


    ¡°None of your damn business,¡± she snapped. ¡°But you should show up. I¡¯ll even give you a job as a runner until you find something better if you deign to visit me on set.¡±


    ¡°Really?¡± David asked. Jennifer had refused him a job every time he had asked since she started Fire Lily Effects at seventeen. Apparently, he didn¡¯t live up to her work ethic. Not that David disagreed with that assessment.


    ¡°Yes, really, though you will actually have to work, you understand,¡± she warned. David grinned.


    ¡°All right, I¡¯ll show up,¡± he said. ¡°But it¡¯s only to sell paparazzi photos of the cast.¡±


    ¡°I know you¡¯re joking,¡± Jennifer acknowledged, ¡°but if you do, I will end you.¡±


    ¡°And I know you¡¯re not joking, so I¡¯ll take that under advisement.¡±


    ¡°So pack your bags, I¡¯ve got you a ticket that leaves tomorrow noon. The confirmation is being sent to your work email.¡±


    ¡°Thanks Jennifer,¡± he said, wondering what he did to deserve such an amazing friend.


    ¡°You are a lazy ass, and I didn¡¯t know what I signed up for when we became friends in preschool,¡± Jennifer said before hanging up. David smiled and turned the water back on to warm his bath again.

 Chapter Two

    Louis Greene thought that he used to love his job.


    He didn¡¯t really remember when, but he knew that there must have been some emotion in his determination to be an actor. He¡¯d spent years fighting his sister¡¯s insistence that he should choose a more normal occupation. His parents, of course, had insisted that it was in his blood, but instead of deterring him like it probably should have, that had only strengthened his determination.


    He refused to be anything like his parents, but he had always wanted to be an actor anyway. There was something about that particular form of storytelling that had always appealed to him. He liked the way that all of the separate parts came together to form a whole that was greater than what they all were individually.


    Rosemarie didn¡¯t see it that way, but then she didn¡¯t like anything unpredictable. That was probably a result of being raised by party animals. Of course, to her, the perfect job for him would have been something more along the lines of accounting.


    And right now, Louis was trying to remember why she wasn¡¯t right.


    Louis hated pretty much everything about this show except for the show runner Nabila Salim. Nabila was passionate and professional without letting it go to her head. Louis wished she was working on another project¡ªhell, he wished he was working on another project¡ªbut if he had to be working with someone on this project, he was glad it was her. She seemed to sense his, if not reluctance, then lack of passion, for the show, and she tried to accommodate his opinions as much as possible. It made him feel like an ass, but he couldn¡¯t force himself to enjoy something he didn¡¯t.


    It was possible that he was just washed up. He was only twenty-six, but when you start at the age of six and never stop, your years start coming pretty fast. It might actually be an appropriate time for a midlife crisis. But that all would have to wait, too. He¡¯d be on this job for as long as he needed to be, and after that, he would move on.


    He still got offers for other shows¡ªeven movies¡ªand assuming that his reputation and skill weren¡¯t ruined by working on this project, that wasn¡¯t likely to change. Not that Louis thought they would be. He¡¯d read the script, and he knew that there was an audience for it, but if things didn¡¯t get going soon, he wasn¡¯t sure how long he¡¯d last.


    The production of Night Mist seemed to be one long procession of problems and postponements.


    The latest catastrophe was the death of his co-star.


    Louis had met Bran Jacobs a couple of times and he seemed like a decent enough guy, but it knotted Louis''s stomach to learn that it was a combination of drugs and alcohol that solidified his fate. Louis couldn¡¯t bring himself to dwell too long on that. It hit too close to home.


    A loud trill echoed through the kitchen and Louis nearly jumped off of the barstool he was occupying as he sipped at an iced lemonade. He reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone. One day he¡¯d get used to the damn ringtone, but it was not this day. He might have changed it except that he always worried a softer sound might go unheard at an inopportune time.


    He checked the number to make sure it was a business call, then answered.


    ¡°Nabila,¡± he greeted.


    ¡°Louis,¡± she said, sounding relieved that she¡¯d gotten ahold of him. Not that it was hard. Louis never ignored work correspondences. ¡°I wanted to talk to you about Bran¡¯s replacement.¡±


    ¡°Have you found someone?¡± Louis asked with a frown. It had only been three days and they hadn¡¯t held auditions yet, to his knowledge.


    ¡°No, but I wanted to let you know that we¡¯ve got the first round of applications if you want to stop by the studio today and see them. We¡¯re trying to get through this quickly, and I want to have the first live auditions on Friday.¡±


    ¡°Oh,¡± Louis said, trying not to let any emotion into his voice. ¡°I can head over in about an hour, if that¡¯s all right.¡±


    ¡°Excellent, I¡¯ll see you there,¡± she said before disconnecting.


    Given the choice, Louis would rather not have any part in it, he¡¯d prefer Nabila just pick somebody and get it over with. That wasn¡¯t fair, though. This may not be his ideal project, but it was important to Nabila and the rest of the dedicated cast and crew who were trying so desperately to get this show going, so Louis would do what it took to achieve technical perfection.


    Louis cleared the dregs of his lemonade into the sink and flopped down on the couch, head dropping back against the cushion. He tugged at the hairs on his eyebrow with one hand, trying to sort out what the hell he was doing with his life before he needed to get to the studio.


    He desperately wanted someone to talk to about all this, but he¡¯d never been great at keeping friends. Rosemarie was his usual go-to for pretty much everything. She¡¯d practically raised him, after all, but he couldn¡¯t go to her about how much he hated this job. Not when he was only here for her.


    Midtown was not his idea of an ideal place to live. It had a population of approximately 17,000 people and was so out dated it was sometimes like stepping back in time except for the fact that there was a Starbucks smack dab in the middle of it like some sort of consumerist temple. It was, however, obvious why they had chosen the setting. Even without the consideration of how cheap it was to film here, the town had a certain presence that made it easy to buy into the idea that paranormal activity might occur here.


    Whatever the reasoning, Louis didn¡¯t want to stay. He felt trapped between wishing that he could leave this place and knowing exactly what it would mean to be free of it. The guilt at that thought was more overwhelming than the idea that he¡¯d be stuck here forever.


    ¡°Lou, can you help me bring these things in?¡± Rosemarie¡¯s lilting voice echoed from downstairs. Louis jumped up and went down to the garage.


    ¡°How was your shopping trip?¡± he asked, quirking an eyebrow as she opened the trunk.


    ¡°Lovely,¡± she said, squeezing his arm. Louis studied her carefully, something he couldn¡¯t help ever since she had gotten sick the first time. She looked good today. Her face lacked that hollow look it sometimes got after treatment. She had always been a full-figured woman, and the way that the cancer and chemo ate away at her was unnerving to watch. But as long as she was smiling, Louis could put the rest aside.


    ¡°Where does this all go?¡± he asked. It was clear that she had been to the outlet in the city. She¡¯d asked Louis to join her this morning, but he¡¯d had other obligations.


    ¡°These two are for you,¡± she said. ¡°I got you some shirts and boxers.¡±


    Louis''ss brow quirked at that. Even now that he was twenty-six and not ten, she still insisted on taking care of him. She was fifteen years his senior and had the habit of treating him more like her kid than her brother.


    ¡°Thanks,¡± he said wryly. ¡°Though I think I still have a couple pairs.¡±


    ¡°Not really, I threw out the ones with holes. Really, for someone as put together as you, your undergarments are disgusting.¡±


    Louis shrugged. ¡°It¡¯s not my fault no one makes sturdy boxers. Why were you going through my clothes in the first place?¡± Louis asked as they walked back upstairs, though he was really more amused than exasperated with her.


    ¡°To see if you needed more underwear,¡± she said simply. ¡°Which you did. And those shirts are a medium, but we can exchange them if you need a small.¡±


    ¡°Either you are calling me skinny, or saying that I¡¯m getting fat,¡± he said.


    ¡°Not fat, but you¡¯ve filled out since high school,¡± she said, then paused for a beat, ¡°just not that much.¡±


    Louis laughed, taking the bags and putting them all where directed. When they were finished, Louis took a seat at the bar. Rosemarie passed into the kitchen, colorful scarf catching in the florescent lights from the ceiling. She noticed the glass in the sink and picked it up, giving him a look as she rinsed it and put it in the dishwasher.


    If you spot this narrative on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.


    ¡°I was going to do that,¡± he said pointedly. ¡°I just got a call from Nabila.¡±


    ¡°Oh?¡± Rosemarie asked, quirking a brow at him. Louis let out a sigh.


    ¡°Asking me to come check out the first auditions. I¡¯m surprised that they¡¯re getting to them so fast after Bran¡¯s death.¡±


    Rosemarie¡¯s lips thinned and she gave a short shake of her head. ¡°I don¡¯t want to hear about that.¡±


    ¡°Sorry,¡± he said. ¡°Anyway, I¡¯m going to head over to the studio in a bit to help sort through them.¡±


    ¡°Hmm, well, I hope there¡¯s someone good in there, because this show is beginning to seem like it will never air.¡±


    ¡°Tell me about it,¡± Louis muttered. ¡°Anything you need me to do before I leave? Or while I¡¯m out?¡±


    ¡°Nothing. Don¡¯t worry about me, Lou. You go do your work and we¡¯ll have dinner when you get back. I was thinking of making something with chicken. What do you think?¡±


    ¡°As long as it¡¯s not burned,¡± Louis teased, wrinkling his nose at her.


    ¡°You¡¯ll never let that go, will you?¡± she said, though her laugh was worth the smack he got on the arm. Louis grinned at her then headed out the door.


    The drive to the studio was longer than it ought to be, but so was everything in this town. It was tiny, but more in population than in size. Mostly it just gave the appearance of being deserted. You still had to drive twenty minutes to the nearest chain store from Rosemarie¡¯s house and the closest city was a good hour away.


    So was the closest hospital.


    When Rosemarie had first gotten sick, Louis had asked her to come live with him in the city, but she¡¯d told him outright that she intended to die in her house. Louis had taken her at her word. At first, it seemed like there would be nothing to worry about, the cancer had gone into remission and seemed to respond to treatment but after almost two years of peace, it came back. And this time the doctors weren¡¯t optimistic. Rosemarie hadn¡¯t broken down in front of him, not once, but they both knew it was merely a waiting game at this point.


    So instead of asking her to move to Weldstone Harbor again, Louis got on the first flight to Midtown. It was purely coincidence that he¡¯d met up with Nabila and been offered a job. His agent wasn¡¯t happy, but then Louis was never very considerate of her happiness. It was probably leftover entitlement from being a childhood star. Still, he made her money, so she couldn¡¯t complain.


    *****


    ¡°Oh good, you¡¯re here,¡± Nabila said as soon as he opened the door. Louis nodded in greeting, hanging his coat by the door.


    Nabila was a tall woman with ochre brown skin, long dark hair, and deep-set eyes. She gave the impression of being both friendly and no-nonsense at the same time. She was already seated with a notebook and pen and her computer flipped open to play the auditions.


    The viewing room was just a TV set up in a corner of the studio, but they were working on a tight budget. Nothing in this place was very big or expensive and he had been impressed so far by Nabila¡¯s ability to produce exceptional television with the available resources.


    ¡°I¡¯ve already narrowed it down to the top ten,¡± she said. ¡°I want to get the best five here to audition in person Friday. You know we¡¯re on a tight schedule, and if we don¡¯t get him cast soon we¡¯re going to have to reorganize shooting.¡± Her brows pinched at the thought. Louis could understand that. Things had been hectic from the start and this latest bit of bad luck was happening perilously close to their first scheduled shoot.


    ¡°Who do you like so far?¡± he asked.


    ¡°I¡¯m not telling,¡± she said. ¡°I want your honest opinion.¡±


    ¡°I¡¯d give that anyway,¡± he said, though that wasn¡¯t entirely true.


    ¡°We¡¯ll start with Fitzwilliam Arbor,¡± she said.


    ¡°That had better be a stage name,¡± Louis said, raising an eyebrow. Nabila chuckled as she played the queue.


    By the time they had finished watching all of them, Louis was dreading the coming year even more than he had been before.


    ¡°I can tell by your face that you have about the same impression that I did,¡± Nabila said with a sigh.


    ¡°It¡¯s not that none of them will work, but¡ª¡± he paused, unable to think of how to finish the sentence politely. ¡°These are really the top ten?¡±


    ¡°They¡¯re really the top ten,¡± Nabila said with a sigh. Louis tugged absently at his eyebrow. There were a couple that he thought might work in the end, but none of them stood out as being a perfect match. Not that Louis had any right to complain. As someone who didn¡¯t want to be here in the first place, he couldn¡¯t really judge the kinds of people who did.


    ¡°There were a few that could work. Two, three, and four were all right,¡± he said.


    ¡°But none of them were really right,¡± Nabila said. ¡°I know. I¡¯m leaving casting open until the last minute, we can hope for the best, but I don¡¯t have much faith.¡±


    ¡°Hmm,¡± Louis agreed. ¡°Sorry I can¡¯t be of more help.¡±


    ¡°No, no, it¡¯s hardly your fault,¡± Nabila said with a wan smile. ¡°We¡¯ll figure it out. I appreciate your input.¡±


    Louis glanced over at her then nodded. ¡°If that¡¯s all, I¡¯ll head back for the day.¡±


    ¡°Yes, go ahead. I¡¯ll keep you posted on the auditions.¡±


    Louis nodded again. They really were all wrong. There were a couple that Louis wanted to discount entirely, but he knew that Nabila was stressed enough as it was without him adding to the mess.


    *****


    The drive home was even slower than the drive there. It was going on 5:30 and rush hour¡ªpitiful as it was¡ªmade the trip down the one lane roads painfully slow. Louis considered passing across a double yellow line but decided that Rosemarie would kill him if he died doing something as stupid as that because he was impatient.


    When he finally got home it was nearly half past six. He opened the door quietly in case Rosemarie had decided to go to bed early. She usually waited up for him, but sometimes she was too exhausted. Louis slipped his shoes off and tiptoed upstairs. The lights were all on and there was a bustling coming from the kitchen.


    Relaxing, he walked normally the rest of the way upstairs to find Rosemarie carefully plating two dishes. Louis sat down on the other side of the counter and watched her. It took a moment for her to notice him there, but when she did, she smiled, gesturing proudly at the plates.


    ¡°Not even burned,¡± she said.


    ¡°Smells good,¡± Louis said, ¡°What is it?¡±


    ¡°I call it chicken . . .¡± she hesitated, ¡°just chicken, actually. I¡¯ve no idea what it¡¯s actually called. It¡¯s got pesto.¡±


    Louis chuckled. ¡°Thank you for the just chicken, then.¡±


    ¡°Welcome,¡± she said, dropping a plate and fork in front of him. Louis got up to grab a glass or set the table or something, but Rosemarie shooed him out of the kitchen.


    There was a fine line between trying to help her and just getting on her nerves. There were some days when she was so tired that Louis would do just about everything, but there were other days when she would be the one to make him sit down and be quiet. Today seemed like one of those days where it wasn¡¯t worth the fight. He thought that maybe taking care of him made her feel more normal. Louis couldn¡¯t find it in himself to deprive either of them of that little comfort.


    ¡°How did casting go?¡± she asked as she sat down to eat at last. Louis glared at his chicken.


    ¡°Nobody will work,¡± he said with a tight voice.


    ¡°They couldn¡¯t all have been that bad. Maybe they are just bad on tapes,¡± she said. ¡°You never know until you meet them in person.¡±


    ¡°I know they¡¯re all that bad, though,¡± he said. ¡°One of them was from that show, the one with the raunchy vampires.¡±


    Rosemarie outright giggled.


    ¡°Well, maybe he¡¯s not so bad when he¡¯s acting in person,¡± she said.


    ¡°They¡¯re auditioning for TV! They need to be good at being filmed!¡±


    ¡°Hmm, you can at least give them a chance.¡±


    ¡°And actually, he was probably the best of them,¡± Louis said. ¡°I think it says something that Nabila is willing to give him a chance, because if I was writing in the same genre, I certainly would stay well away from anyone from Lust Story.¡± He said the name with utter contempt. It was one of those situations where the book had been terrible and the show had taken it to a whole new level. He had actually read it because Rosemarie loved terrible, terrible fiction and sometimes, when there was nothing else in the house to read, you had to make do.


    ¡°Which one auditioned, if that¡¯s not a secret?¡±


    ¡°The blond one. Big blue eyes,¡± he said. ¡°The one that wanted to suck the virgin¡¯s blood.¡± He gave her a significant look and Rosemarie started giggling all over again.


    ¡°He¡¯s cute at least,¡± she said when she had composed herself. It figured that she knew who he was talking about. She was probably one of three people who actually watched the show all the way through.


    Louis refrained from commenting and stabbed a fork into his chicken.


    ¡°Say what you will about it,¡± Rosemarie said, clearly noting the look he was giving her, ¡°I like anything with vampires.¡±


    ¡°And I can¡¯t understand why,¡± he said.


    ¡°Maybe it was the vampire show you were in when you were little,¡± she said with a nostalgic sigh. He knew she was teasing, but he was still affronted at the accusation.


    ¡°They were aliens, not vampires,¡± he said.


    ¡°They did suck blood.¡±


    ¡°Still aliens. There¡¯s a difference.¡±


    ¡°Well, if nothing else, he¡¯ll draw in the hard core vampire fans,¡± she said. ¡°You know, the ones that will watch literally anything with vampires.¡±


    ¡°Yeah, because the premise of the show wouldn¡¯t do that already.¡±


    ¡°It¡¯ll work out, Lou,¡± she said.


    Louis sighed. ¡°I hope so. I wish this didn¡¯t happen in the first place,¡± he said. ¡°There¡¯ve been enough issues without having to recast a lead character.¡±


    ¡°It¡¯s terrible business,¡± she said.


    ¡°If we¡¯re lucky, the show will just end after this season.¡±


    ¡°You shouldn¡¯t be hoping for unemployment, dear.¡±


    ¡°It¡¯s better than working on a show that can¡¯t get its shit together.¡±


    ¡°I thought you liked Nabila.¡±


    ¡°I do, but that doesn¡¯t mean that the show likes any of us back.¡±


    ¡°Stop whining and figure it out, then,¡± she said.


    Her eyes were a challenge and Louis felt the familiar sense of appreciation for her. There were few things that could motivate him like that look, the one that said, you can damn well do this, so just solve the problem. Despite her disapproval of some of Louis''s life choices, Rosemarie was unwaveringly supportive of him in whatever he wanted.


    He rolled his eyes, trying to hold back a smile. ¡°I¡¯ll do my best.¡±


    ¡°Good,¡± she said, patting him on the hand. ¡°Oh, and Lou,¡± she said, gaze suddenly serious, ¡°you be careful and stay safe.¡±


    ¡°I will,¡± Louis said just as seriously.


    He understood why she didn¡¯t like his profession, he really did. Their father had died of an overdose and his mother was still in prison for manslaughter while driving under the influence. But Louis didn¡¯t even drink. He wished that he could wipe that worry from his sister¡¯s face, even as he knew he would never stop acting.


    Louis wasn¡¯t even sure who he was without that part of himself. He wasn¡¯t sure if he was anyone besides the face he put on for the camera.


    Quitting just wasn¡¯t an option.

 Chapter Three

    The first thing David noticed about Midtown was that it really didn¡¯t deserve its own name. And he couldn¡¯t, for the life of him, figure out why it had its own airport.


    A town this small had no business having an airport.


    Not that it was much of an airport, but it still had to take up at least half of the area code. There were two houses in the distance and a single lane road¡ªDavid couldn¡¯t tell from here, but it probably wasn¡¯t paved either¡ªthat led away from the dinky airport.


    The second thing he noticed about Midtown was that Jennifer looked entirely out of place and entirely at home here. She was dressed in a tan jacket over a black turtleneck dress and black leather boots that were polished to a shine. David beamed when he saw her, his step picking up as she approached.


    ¡°You¡¯re here,¡± she said, tone dry, even as she smiled at him, opening her arms for a hug. David squeezed her, laughing at her squeak when he lifted her off the ground.


    ¡°You idiot, put me down,¡± she said. David gave her another squeeze then set her back on her feet. ¡°It¡¯s only been about three weeks since we last saw each other.¡±


    ¡°You say that like it¡¯s not the end of the world,¡± David said, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. She gave him a look and elbowed him in the ribs.


    ¡°You¡¯ll live, Davie,¡± she said. ¡°How was your flight?¡±


    ¡°Was that even a real plane?¡± David asked. ¡°Because I¡¯ve never seen an airport this small. Is it safe? Up to code?¡±


    ¡°You¡¯re alive aren¡¯t you?¡±


    David shrugged. ¡°Where¡¯s baggage claim?¡±


    ¡°This way,¡± she said, her boots clacking rhythmically as she led the way. When they had retrieved David¡¯s measly belongings, they headed to her car¡ªa bright orange mustang that looked almost absurd in this setting¡ªand then to the hotel where David would be staying.


    ¡°You mean you aren¡¯t even going to let me stay at your apartment?¡± David whined. Jennifer was the kind of woman who picked up a short-term lease wherever she traveled. Hotels, she said, were for those who strived to feed the local bedbug population.


    ¡°No way in hell,¡± Jennifer said, flipping her dark hair over her shoulder. ¡°We did that once before. Do you remember how it ended?¡±


    ¡°With you threatening to evict me,¡± he said. ¡°Well, technically you did evict me, actually.¡±


    ¡°I gently suggested that we part ways,¡± she said. ¡°And we¡¯re still friends because of it.¡±


    That was probably a fair assessment. They didn¡¯t work well as roommates. At all.


    ¡°When do I start work, though?¡± he asked, because, frankly, he didn¡¯t have a lot of money to his name at the moment. His lease was month-to-month, and he¡¯d decided it was easier to drop it when he left and hope that there was still a place for him when he got back from the middle of nowhere. He had to figure out how to afford a plane ticket first.


    ¡°Where is this hotel,¡± he asked.


    ¡°It¡¯s a bed and breakfast,¡± Jennifer said absently, ¡°and it¡¯s not too far from the studio.¡±


    ¡°Is that where I¡¯ll be working? What exactly is a runner?¡±


    ¡°A personal slave, Davie. My personal slave. By the way, I got you an audition.¡±


    ¡°For what?¡± David asked slowly, unsure if he was excited or horrified.


    ¡°That top-secret project I¡¯m working on. There was a casting call last minute. I contacted Katherine and had her send in the tapes.¡±


    ¡°Can she do that? Without my permission?¡±


    ¡°Shut up, you can fire her later if you don¡¯t get the job,¡± she said. ¡°I knew you¡¯d be hesitant to agree if I told you about it before I convinced you to come here.¡±


    ¡°Why? What¡¯s wrong with it? I thought you said there were some big names?¡± he asked.


    ¡°There are,¡± she said. ¡°But it¡¯s an urban fantasy, and I thought that you might be a little wary of those at this point.¡±


    ¡°Ugh,¡± David said, leaning against the window until Jennifer snapped at him not to put faceprints on her car.


    ¡°It¡¯s a good chance, Davie, and you got called back,¡± she said. ¡°You might as well give it a try. The director¡¯s no nonsense; I don¡¯t think she¡¯ll dock you for your past poor choices.¡±


    ¡°You say that¡­¡±


    ¡°I mean it. Besides, her other actor is a big enough name that I don¡¯t think that your tainted career is enough to overshadow it.¡±


    ¡°In that case it¡¯s ridiculous to even try out!¡± David said, eyes going wide.


    He wondered who the co-star would be. If it was a big name, David had no chance of getting the role in the first place. He thought he was a decent actor, but he wasn¡¯t famous. Not by a long shot. He¡¯d mostly done commercials and modeling up until now.


    Actually, he was mostly just a pretty face. It was the eyes. He had angelic eyes. David fluttered his eyelashes for no reason before realizing what he¡¯d done. He glanced at Jennifer out of the corner of his eye but she didn¡¯t seem to have noticed. Good thing she was a good driver who actually kept her eyes on the road. Otherwise that would have been embarrassing.


    ¡°Thanks,¡± David said after a moment. Because what else was there to say? And even if he bombed it, Jennifer had already agreed to give him a job. It was too late for her to go back on her word.


    ¡°You better not get comfortable as a runner,¡± Jennifer said, reading his mind, ¡°because you will be sub-par at it. I want you to work toward getting more acting work. Even if you have to start over from square one.¡±


    ¡°Like getting an insane amount of plastic surgery and changing my name so that no one knows what I was in?¡± he asked.


    ¡°Yes.¡±


    ¡°You¡¯re mean.¡±


    ¡°You love me anyway,¡± she said, reaching across the middle console to squeeze his knee.


    When they reached the Midtown Bed & Breakfast, David realized why she had corrected him.


    ¡°Are you sure this isn¡¯t a house?¡± David asked, reluctant to just waltz in, despite the little plate outside the door that welcomed guests.


    ¡°Yes,¡± she said, ¡°and it¡¯s a lovely place. Mrs. Hamish is a great connection to have.¡±


    Leave it to Jennifer to network in a town so small it didn''t even have a real name.


    A little bell rang as David entered the establishment and he looked up to see an old fashioned mechanism with an actual bell attached to it. Not like the electronic beeping of the city. If nothing else, David thought he¡¯d enjoy this place for that bell.


    It was charming.


    And made him want to open and close the door a couple more times. Jennifer grabbed his arm and steered him toward the front counter before he could act on the impulse.


    ¡°One moment!¡± called a voice from somewhere in the house¡ªreally, it was a house. David didn¡¯t know how a place that couldn¡¯t have more than five rooms could be a B&B, but he¡¯d stay for the bell.


    Mrs. Hamish, it turned out, was a stocky woman with pale, freckled skin, long brown hair tied up in a bun on top of her head, and reading glasses perched on a broad nose. She smiled at him and greeted Jennifer like an old friend.


    ¡°This is my friend David Benton,¡± Jennifer said. ¡°He needs a room for a while. He¡¯ll be staying here during filming.¡±


    ¡°Ah. The blue room, you think?¡± Mrs. Hamish asked.


    Jennifer frowned. ¡°Is the yellow one open?¡± she asked.


    Mrs. Hamish gave him an assessing look, like there was an audition for the room. Then nodded. ¡°Yes, but the blue room has a bigger bed,¡± she said.


    ¡°He won¡¯t need one.¡±


    David didn¡¯t have time to ask why he wouldn¡¯t need one before Mrs. Hamish nodded and checked him into the room, giving him a key painted with yellow daisies. David smoothed his finger over the rough paint and smiled.


    That was charming, too. Everything here was so charming, he was beginning to suspect that he might like small towns.


    The yellow room was... really yellow. The walls were yellow, the bedspread was yellow, even the curtains were yellow. The floor was hardwood, but it had a yellow rug. There was even a yellow cozy over a box of tissues on the nightstand.


    ¡°The bathroom is in there,¡± Mrs. Hamish said, ¡°and breakfast is served before ten. You have your own fridge and microwave, though, if you¡¯re feeling shy.¡±


    ¡°He doesn¡¯t do shy, so I''m sure you''ll see him around,¡± Jennifer said. ¡°Thank you, Mrs. Hamish.¡±


    Mrs. Hamish beamed and David thanked the woman as she bustled out of the room with a word about how he should call on her if he needed anything.


    ¡°When do I start work?¡±


    ¡°Tomorrow,¡± Jennifer said. ¡°Things are busy around the set with trying to get everything ready.¡±


    ¡°What exactly am I going to be doing?¡± he asked.


    ¡°No idea.¡± Jennifer shrugged, looking unconcerned. ¡°Whatever I need you to do. Don¡¯t be picky. You¡¯re the one who wanted a job.¡±


    ¡°And what about the audition?¡±


    ¡°In person on Friday. You¡¯ve been short-listed,¡± she said with a cheery smile that sent a chill down David''s back. Someone that cute had no business being as dangerous as as she was. Like one of those little octopuses that looked all adorable and brightly colored as they murdered you.


    ¡°Now, go shower so that we can check out the set,¡± she said. ¡°I¡¯ll wait here.¡±


    ¡°It wasn¡¯t that long a flight,¡± he said.


    ¡°You smell, though,¡± she said.


    ¡°I do not,¡± he said, even as he dropped his suitcase on the bed and pulled out a fresh set of clothes to go shower.


    When he was done, he came out to find Jennifer, unsurprisingly, rifling through his things. Perhaps it started under the guise of putting things away, but she¡¯d ended up cross legged on the bed with an old shoebox in her lap and was systematically examining the contents.


    ¡°I look like such a nerd,¡± Jennifer said, pointing to a picture of them when they were in the fifth grade. ¡°Was this before or after I dumped you?¡±


    ¡°You didn¡¯t dump me, you never even gave me the time of day,¡± David said, sitting down beside her on the bed. ¡°But that was before. You dumped me in high school.¡±


    ¡°Right,¡± Jennifer said. ¡°Awe, that¡¯s adorable. You¡¯re so fat!¡±


    ¡°I was a baby!¡± David protested.


    ¡°Still fat,¡± Jennifer said, ¡°but I just said it was adorable, so stop scrunching your face like that. You¡¯ll turn into a goblin.¡±


    If you find this story on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the infringement.


    "What does that even mean?" he grumbled.


    Jennifer cocked her head to the side. ¡°What¡¯s this?¡± She pulled out a piece of yellow paper encased in plastic.


    ¡°What¡¯s wha¡ª¡± David made a grab for the plastic sleeve, but Jennifer kneed him in the side when he dove for it.


    ¡°Is this the letter?¡± she screeched in mirth. ¡°You still have it?¡±


    ¡°It¡¯s the only thing a famous person has ever written to me,¡± David complained, rubbing his bruised ribs. Jennifer took the crumpled yellow stationary paper out of the protective plastic casing and read it. There was no reason for him to be so touchy about it after nearly twenty years, but seeing the letter still gave him anxiety.


    ¡°He told you your lyrics suck,¡± she said. ¡°Clearly, he has good taste.¡±


    ¡°That¡¯s mean, I was five,¡± David huffed, making another grab for it. Jennifer dodged and ruffled his hair.


    ¡°True. Your lyrics aren¡¯t nearly that bad anymore. In fact, I was just reading some of them a moment ago.¡± She gestured to his lyric notebook, which was sitting neatly on the bedside table.


    ¡°You aren¡¯t supposed to read other people¡¯s diaries,¡± he said, sitting back against the headboard with her.


    ¡°It¡¯s not a diary, it¡¯s a notebook. Besides, you like it when I read your lyrics,¡± she said. ¡°Otherwise you wouldn¡¯t send them to me all the damn time.¡±


    David leaned his shoulder into hers so he could better look at what she was reading. He¡¯d honestly forgotten that it was in there. Seeing it from an adult¡¯s perspective, he could understand that the words probably weren¡¯t as harsh as they had seemed at the time. Louis had been seven and he¡¯d still thanked David for writing, even if he had said that the lyrics sucked and David should reconsider his career.


    ¡°What the hell did you write about?¡± Jennifer asked, pointing to a line referencing the taxonomy of moths.


    ¡°Oh, it was about a bird and a moth,¡± he said. ¡°The bird ate the moth, I think. It was a cool moth, though. During my bug phase.¡±


    ¡°It was a phase?¡± Jennifer said, raising a perfectly plucked eyebrow. David chuckled and knocked his shoulder against hers.


    ¡°Anyway, that was the end of that,¡± David said.


    ¡°You know, Davie, that¡¯s your problem,¡± she said. David looked at her blankly until she continued. ¡°You are far too concerned with what other people think of you. Even me. You need to figure out what you want and go for it. Don''t give up just because of some negative feedback.¡±


    "I was five!"


    "Are you still five?"


    David didn¡¯t know how to respond to that.


    Ignoring the sway of external feedback was easier said than done. Especially when your livelihood depended on other people¡¯s opinions of you. It wasn¡¯t like David could just do whatever he wanted and make it as an actor. He had to gain the approval of the directors, cast, and crew, not to mention the audience.


    That¡¯s what the entertainment business was.


    ¡°If you¡¯re done snooping, were we going to go see the set?¡± David asked, instead of answering her question. Jennifer studied him for a moment with a vaguely disappointed expression before dropping the items back into his shoebox and hopping off the bed.


    "All right, let''s go. But think about what I said, Davie. Grow a pair."


    David rolled his eyes and followed her down to her Mustang.


    *****


    The studio tour was perfunctory and by the time David was ready to start the next day he''d already forgotten where everything was. Jennifer picked him up in the morning with an admonishment that it would be the last time, so not to get used to her taxi services.


    The studio space was probably within walking distance of the B&B, though wouldn''t make for a particularly pleasant walk considering there was still snow on the ground¡ªsomething that might have been delightful if the snow banks weren''t died black and brown with mud and whatever else. Weldstone Harbor didn¡¯t get a lot of snow; it was more about rain there. Apparently, Midtown stayed snowy well into February and beyond, if Jennifer was to be believed.


    ¡°Filming is scheduled to start in about a week,¡± Jennifer said on their way over, ¡°so this casting is pretty rushed.¡±


    ¡°Why are we talking about the casting instead of the job I¡¯m supposed to be doing today?¡±


    ¡°Because I¡¯m really hoping that by Friday you¡¯ll have a different job,¡± she said.


    ¡°What role did I audition for, by the way?¡± It was probably some side character whose contract had fallen through. That was fine, though. Anything was fine at this point.


    ¡°It¡¯s only a one-season gig, but it¡¯s a lead role within the season,¡± she said. ¡°All I can say is that you¡¯re supposed to be a detective in a small town.¡±


    ¡°A lead role?¡± David said in disbelief. ¡°Jennifer, I¡¯m never going to get a lead role. Even a season lead. Especially if you¡¯ve been serious about the big names in the show.¡±


    Jennifer shrugged. ¡°You will at least try,¡± she said in a tone brooking no argument. ¡°I know you can charm the pants off a cat, so just be yourself.¡±


    ¡°Not hard. Cats don¡¯t even wear pants.¡±


    ¡°By Friday, you¡¯ll be glad to be rid of me,¡± Jennifer said with a wicked grin. ¡°Call it a bit of extra motivation.¡±


    *****


    It did not take until Friday.


    It took David an hour to decide that he did not enjoy being a runner for Jennifer and by the end of his first day he wanted to burst into stress tears.


    She was a terror.


    Whether because she was actually a really tight assed boss or just because she liked picking on David in particular, David could safely say it was one of the worst jobs he¡¯d ever taken.


    By Friday morning, David was determined to give his best audition ever. He was still anxious but he was also desperate and the desperation was an impressively effective motivator. In fact, he was considering calling up Katherine and asking her to get him in for that STI awareness commercial, despite the memes he could see coming from it.


    David had prepared the portion of the script that he was supposed to be reading. It was a scene where the main character, ¡°Don Christoph (vampire),¡± was asking ¡°Detective Marcus Lazarus (human)¡± to help on a case. He was just going to go in there, read the script and then be on his way. No big deal. It wasn''t like his life and sanity depended on it.


    ¡°Welcome, David, I¡¯m Nabila Salim, the show runner and director of the series,¡± a tall woman with long brown hair and tawny skin said as he entered the room for his audition.


    David gave her his best smile. Jennifer had spoken highly of Nabila, to the point where David wondered if she might have a thing for the director. It was certainly unusual for her to work on a project like this unless she was majorly incentivized.


    ¡°It¡¯s a pleasure,¡± David said, shaking her hand.


    ¡°And this is Louis Greene, he¡¯ll be playing the role of Don Christoph.¡±


    David¡¯s blood turned to ice water as he caught sight of the man standing off to the side. He hoped his face wasn''t as red as it looked as images of moths and birds bombarded him and he remembered just how starstruck he''d been with Louis Greene when he was five and how he was feeling every bit as star struck right now.


    David was a little faint.


    Louis Greene was everything that David had imagined he would be and more. His dark hair was neatly combed to the side and his jaw was fashionably stubbled, cutting a sharp line against his ivory skin. Even the thick-rimmed glasses perched on his nose looked fashionable. He took a step forward and reached out a hand to David.


    ¡°Nice to meet you,¡± he said, as David hesitantly took his hand. He even smelled fashionable. Like something deep and something sharp all at once.


    ¡°Yeah,¡± David forced out, too focused on the fact that he was touching Louis Greene¡¯s hand. He tried to smile, but had a feeling that he probably just looked ill. Louis lips twitched down in a small frown as he dropped David¡¯s hand and turned to a chair off to the side of the room.


    ¡°We¡¯ll just do a quick run through of the scene and then you can be on your way,¡± Nabila said, gesturing David to a stool in the center of the room. ¡°We¡¯ll get back to you soon so keep your eyes open.¡±


    ¡°Thank you,¡± David said, his voice suddenly dry.


    Was Louis Greene really the big name Jennifer had mentioned? And was he really auditioning across from Louis Greene right now?


    David perched on the edge of the stool and cleared his throat, at least twenty percent of his brain power focusing on keeping his leg from bouncing where it rested on one of the rungs.


    ¡°All right, we¡¯ll be reading from page six,¡± Nabila said, ¡°starting with Don Christoph, ¡®I don¡¯t see the use of having you here.¡¯ Go.¡±


    ¡°I don¡¯t see the use of having you here,¡± Louis said. David¡¯s eyes were so caught up in the way his mouth moved when he spoke that he completely forgot to look at his script. A moment passed before he realized why he couldn¡¯t find his lines.


    ¡°Sorry, sorry, I was on the wrong page,¡± David muttered, flipping frantically through the script to find the right page. His face was definitely turning red.


    ¡°That¡¯s all right,¡± Nabila assured, ¡°whenever you¡¯re ready.¡±


    ¡°All right, sorry,¡± David said when he¡¯d finally found the lines they were reading. He couldn¡¯t remember the last time he messed up this badly in an audition.


    ¡°Louis, again,¡± Nabila said.


    ¡°I don¡¯t see the use of having you here,¡± Louis said again, eyes piercing David as he sat at the center of the room. David took a deep breath, trying to force himself into character, but it was harder than it usually was.


    Probably because Louis Greene was currently glaring at him from across the room.


    ¡°I have every right to be here. This is my town and my investigation.¡± David¡¯s voice faltered, and he could already feel heat flushing his cheeks. Weak, David thought. That was a terrible reading. Louis was probably wondering why he was even here auditioning.


    Damn Jennifer. She couldn¡¯t have warned him that it was going to be Louis Greene here? Even after seeing that letter? He could feel the uncomfortable prickle of sweat against his neck.


    ¡°You have no idea what you¡¯re getting yourself into, detective,¡± Louis said, voice sharp and intent. David had no trouble seeing Louis as a the vampire lord he was portraying, full of distain and judgement. With those dark eyes riveted on him, David could hardly breathe. It was like that seven-year-old¡¯s judgment only worse.


    This time, David was actually here in person to make a fool of himself. The only comfort was that there was no way Louis remembered him as the stupid kid who had written him a song about a moth.


    ¡°I w-won¡¯t be¡ª¡± David stuttered. His mind had completely lost its track, and he wasn¡¯t sure where he was in the script, either. A wave of blind panic had his vision spotting and cold sweat dampening the script clutched in his hand. ¡°Sorry, I¡ª¡± David¡¯s voice caught even on that, face burning as he looked at the slight frown on Louis''s face. ¡°Sorry, I don¡¯t think I¡¯m cut out for this role, after all.¡± David gave them his best smile then walked out the door with as much dignity as he could muster.


    ¡°Fuck,¡± he muttered to himself when the door shut behind him. He didn¡¯t stop until he had reached Jennifer¡¯s office. It was empty, but David just sat down on the floor by the desk and buried his head in his knees, trying to slow his heart. He had never been this mortified in his life, and that was saying something.


    David pulled out the lyric notebook he kept in the back pocket of his jeans and flipped through it to an empty page and scribbled out the lyrics.


    Those eyes disguised a snake-head faux


    My Pretty atlas wing


    The weight of worlds on two dark rings


    Devouring all you know


    He didn¡¯t know how long he¡¯d been sitting there when Jennifer walked in, nearly tripping over him. To her credit, she didn¡¯t berate him, just sat down beside him and tucked her arm around his, leaning her head against his shoulder.


    ¡°There¡¯ll be a next time, Davie,¡± she muttered.


    ¡°I don¡¯t think you understand quite how badly I blew it in there,¡± David choked out. ¡°I swear to god, I can never show my face in this town again.¡±


    ¡°It¡¯s not that bad,¡± she said, ¡°no one will even notice you as my runner. And if they do, I can make you into a werewolf.¡±


    David gave a half-hearted chuckle. ¡°I don¡¯t know that that¡¯ll be enough to hide my shame.¡±


    ¡°What¡¯s that?¡± she asked, pulling the notebook over from where David had it resting by his knee. She flipped through the pages with a frown.


    ¡°Revisiting memories,¡± David said with a harsh laugh. Jennifer sighed before tapping him on the head with the notebook.


    ¡°You need to get over him,¡± she said.


    ¡°You make it sound like he¡¯s a long lost love,¡± David said, glaring at her.


    Jennifer shrugged. ¡°He kind of is. He¡¯s your demon. You might eventually win his approval, but you might not. You¡¯ll succeed when you finally stop caring.¡±


    ¡°How do you stop caring, though?¡±


    ¡°I can¡¯t answer that.¡±


    David¡¯s head fell back against the desk with a clunk and Jennifer gave his arm a squeeze.


    *****


    David didn¡¯t talk to anyone for the rest of the morning, trying to keep his head down and avoid anyone who might have witnessed his utter humiliation. It was surprisingly easy, actually. No one seemed to care at all about what David did or who he was. He was wearing a hoodie and glasses partially as a disguise, but mostly because it made Jennifer give him a really pained look every time she saw him. It was one of those small pleasures in life that David had to take advantage of lest he decide to run away and seclude himself forever atop a mountain.


    By the time lunch rolled around, though, David was fairly certain that he was more angry than upset about the audition fiasco. He usually wasn¡¯t terrible and he blamed most of today¡¯s catastrophe on being blindsided by Louis Greene. It may have been part of Jennifer¡¯s plan¡ªone could never really put anything past her¡ªor she may have just neglected to mention that he was the other lead because of contract obligations or because she hadn¡¯t realized how much it would mess with David to see him there.


    By the time Jennifer finally joined him in the cafeteria, he was full blown sullen. She took one look at him and told him that if he didn¡¯t stop pouting she was going to find someone more pleasurable to eat with. David had replied that that was fine with him and she¡¯d sat down with him anyway.


    ¡°You could have warned me, you know,¡± he said, pulling the notebook out of his pocket and then tearing the page with the new poem out so it didn¡¯t sully the rest of his work¡ªnot that the rest of his work was more than a collection of scribbles to begin with.


    Jennifer took a bite of her pasta before she spoke. ¡°I could have warned you, yes, but then you wouldn¡¯t have even gone in there,¡± she said. ¡°It was a miscalculation on my part. I didn¡¯t think he¡¯d be a part of the casting process at this point, but I guess they wanted it to double as a chemistry read.¡±


    ¡°So you were going to wait until after the audition to tell me?¡± David said.


    ¡°I was going to wait until after you had had a good audition with Nabila, to tell you,¡± she said. ¡°But I would have told you before you had a screen test or anything with Louis. That way you¡¯d have seen that you can do this, but at the same time, you wouldn¡¯t be blindsided by it. As I said, it was a miscalculation on my part.¡±


    ¡°I¡¯m not really sure if that¡¯s encouraging or not,¡± he said. ¡°I appreciate your faith in me, but I wouldn¡¯t be so sure that I¡¯d have gotten a screen test even if I hadn¡¯t shot myself in the foot.¡±


    ¡°Well, you haven¡¯t seen yourself act,¡± she said. ¡°I mean it when I say that you¡¯re good. You just have the shittiest luck I¡¯ve ever seen.¡±


    ¡°Uh, thanks I guess.¡±


    ¡°What are you scribbling out now?¡± she asked, snatching his paper away from him. ¡°Really? Why are you writing this again? Burn it. In fact, I¡¯ll burn it for you.¡± Jennifer made to pull something out of her purse but David snatched the page away before she could do any harm.


    ¡°I¡¯m working on it because it won¡¯t leave my head,¡± he said. ¡°It¡¯s not because of him.¡±


    It was probably definitely because of him, but she didn¡¯t need to know that. Not that she looked particularly convinced anyway, but plausible deniability was key.


    ¡°Why a moth?¡±


    ¡°Because, despite their size and the way their wings mimic a snake, they are still at the bottom of the food chain. Almost every predator will eat them. It¡¯s both pitiful and inspiring,¡± he paused. ¡°At least, that¡¯s why I like them now, at the time they were just really cool, you know? Giant moths.¡±


    ¡°Mothman,¡± she said, nudging his leg under the table, ¡°don¡¯t get yourself eaten.¡±


    ¡°Shut up,¡± David said, snatching the paper away and setting it out of view on the bench so she couldn¡¯t reach it again.


    ¡°He¡¯s forgotten about you,¡± she said, ¡°so forget about him.¡±


    David ignored her, looking imperiously back down at his lunch. ¡°What else do we have to do today?¡±


    ¡°After lunch, you get to help me mix resin,¡± she said. ¡°There are measuring cups, so I¡¯m hoping you don¡¯t screw it up too badly.¡±


    ¡°Thank you for your faith.¡±


    Jennifer looked at him with utter seriousness and David rolled his eyes. ¡°It¡¯s that or I¡¯ll send you into the city for coffee.¡±


    ¡°No.¡±


    ¡°You do know how to drive,¡± she pointed out.


    ¡°Yes, but farmers in trucks scare me and the idea of scratching your Mustang scares me even more.¡±


    ¡°Whatever. Finish eating so that we can get out of here.¡±


    By the time he realized that he¡¯d left his lyrics sitting on the bench, he was back at Mrs. Hamish¡¯s B&B, tucked under a painfully yellow bedspread.


    It was probably fine, though. No one would have thought twice about a crumpled paper. The janitor had probably already thrown it away.


    And if he hadn¡¯t, well, David could check the cafeteria in the morning.

 Chapter Four

    Louis hadn¡¯t been particularly keen on being a part of the casting process. He didn¡¯t like to see the initial auditions because it always gave him expectations about what they would be like during the screen test. He felt it was better to let their natural chemistry take over on camera for an accurate gauge of what filming would be like. Readings just didn¡¯t give the same dramatic atmosphere.


    Besides, it wasn¡¯t like it mattered who they cast. Louis would perform to the best of his ability regardless of whom he was acting opposite. It wouldn¡¯t be the first time he hated a costar and the experience wasn¡¯t likely to be enjoyable even if they found the perfect Marcus Lazarus.


    But after Louis had made it through nine sub-par auditions, he had been almost excited for the last one. It was going to be David Benton, the most promising of the video auditions, despite having acted on Lust Story. Louis only hoped that he was better in person than on tape. As Rosemarie said, he needed to give them all a chance. Of course, he didn¡¯t have much of a choice seeing as they were getting perilously close to the beginning of filming and no one wanted to push the schedule back any further than it already was.


    He shouldn''t have gotten his hopes up.


    David had come in bright-eyed and smiling. He looked completely at ease with himself as he greeted Nabila and, for a moment, Louis had found himself taken aback by those eyes, so blue they didn''t seem real. But the look that came over his face when he had spotted Louis was one of¡ªthere was really no other word for it¡ªhorror.


    It threw Louis off his game and he thought he might have returned the look with a frown, but he wasn¡¯t sure. He wasn¡¯t usually rude right off the bat, but Louis didn¡¯t think that his mere presence was horrifying. Louis knew that he had his critics, but this was ridiculous.


    Was it because he was gay? It wasn''t a well-known fact, but it wasn''t exactly a secret, either. If you dug far enough into the archives of his appearances, it came up on occasion, usually in passing or semi-veiled references.


    Once they actually began to read lines, the audition turned into something so bafflingly terrible that Louis was surprised that Benton had ever gotten a role at all, even on a show as terrible as Lust Story. And then he¡¯d just left half way through.


    Nabila looked almost as furious as Louis felt. The lack of professionalism rubbed him the wrong way. The least he could have done was to show them and their time some respect.


    ¡°Not him,¡± was all Louis said. Nabila nodded emphatically.


    ¡°Two was my favorite,¡± she said, though the words sounded forced. Louis leaned back in his chair, feeling the anxious prickle of anger over the last audition.


    Louis nodded slowly. ¡°Have you gotten any more auditions?¡±


    ¡°Not any decent ones,¡± Nabila said. ¡°Did you see any that you thought you¡¯d work well with?¡±


    Louis shrugged. ¡°I¡¯m more concerned with their performance.¡±


    ¡°We¡¯ll keep looking,¡± Nabila said with a sigh. ¡°Thank you for coming in today, I''ll keep you posted.¡±


    ¡°Of course,¡± Louis said, shaking her hand with a smile before leaving the building.


    Monday was going to be hard. Without a Marcus Lazarus, they would have to film around the absence by re-organizing the scenes, but they were on a tight schedule and had to get most of the scenes done before the melting snow changed the scenery too much.


    *****


    Monday was hell.


    Everyone was a little off kilter because of the sudden scheduling shift, but Louis was probably the most frustrated of all. They were trying to get around some of the road blocks with camera tricks but it was hard to react to a person when they not only weren''t there, but didn''t even exist in your mental catalogue.


    Even when the scene didn¡¯t actually include Lazarus, Don still had an emotional reaction to the man and what he represented. Without understanding the subtleties of his character, Louis could only guess at the appropriate emotions. By lunch, Louis was about ready to explode. He hated this job more than anything he¡¯d ever taken part in and he wasn¡¯t even being paid well for it.


    Louis was one of the last people to the cafeteria after a quick costume change to be ready for the next scene in twenty minutes. The cafeteria was almost empty, though, which Louis counted as a plus, even if he was getting even more surly due to lack of sustenance. He got himself a chicken salad and sat down at one of the benches.


    He had figured that this was going to be a long year, but he hadn¡¯t anticipated quite how draining it would be. It was only the first day and he was already wound so tight he thought he might snap.


    Louis shifted in his seat then glanced down when something rustled against his thigh. There was a piece of notebook paper sitting on the bench, the edge ripped jaggedly from a notebook that wasn''t intended to part with its pages.


    Louis set down his fork and picked it up, glancing over it to make sure it wasn¡¯t anything important someone had left lying around. It wasn¡¯t, but something else caught his eye. The sheet was titled ¡°Atlas and the King.¡±


    He felt a twinge of d¨¦j¨¤ vu and his curiosity got the better of his judgment, even as he chastised himself for the invasion of privacy.


    It seemed to be a half-finished poem¡ªlyrics, his mind supplied, though he had not way of knowing if that was the intention¡ªabout a moth and a bird. It wasn¡¯t that it was so strange to find a poem, but it was very strange to find this particular poem. It was like he¡¯d read it before, but couldn¡¯t remember when or why. Louis pocketed the paper with the intention of looking it up the next time he was at his computer.


    During afternoon break, Louis ended up pulling out his phone to search for the poem. Only he couldn¡¯t find anything even remotely close to the poem. The Atlas moth looked familiar. He''d probably seen it on a nature documentary at some point, but there weren''t any songs or poems about atlas moths in the results.


    Putting his phone down in frustration, he pulled the poem out of his pocket and read over it again. There was no author or indication about who wrote it, but Louis''s curiosity was at a full burn now. He had to know who wrote it. Maybe Nabila knew if one of her crew was a poet.


    ¡°Where did you get that?¡± a sharp voice demanded. Louis jumped, shoving the paper guiltily behind his back as though he''d been caught passing notes in class.


    Jennifer Yang, the special effects manager, looked up at him almost menacingly


    ¡°That is not for you.¡±


    ¡°What do you mean?¡± he asked, cautiously.


    Ms. Yang gave him a long look and holding her red-clawed hand out flat for the paper. ¡°I know it doesn¡¯t belong to you, hand it over.¡±


    ¡°You know who wrote this?¡± Louis asked then, pulling the paper back out, though keeping it just out of easy reach. As long as he was already caught, he might as well try to get more information.


    Ms. Yang shrugged sagely, giving him the stink-eye, though he couldn¡¯t understand why. They¡¯d been amiable up to this moment. He wondered if it might be hers, but he somehow doubted it. He just couldn''t imagine Jennifer Yang writing poetry about moths.


    ¡°Yes," she said. ¡°May I have it back, please?¡±


    "Is it yours?" Louis asked.


    "No, but I know the owner," she said.


    "Who?"


    "It''s none of your business."


    Louis raised an eyebrow. "Is it that much of a secret? I''ll return it to the owner if you tell me who it is."


    Jennifer pursed her lips, hand still extended. "Hand it over."


    ¡°No,¡± Louis said, pocketing the paper.


    ¡°That¡¯s theft,¡± she said.


    It was almost impossible to stop himself from rolling his eyes. ¡°Theft of a piece of paper? I already said I''d return it if you told me who it belongs to. How do I know it¡¯s yours or that you know who it belongs to?¡±


    ¡°Because I know it¡¯s about a bird and a moth,¡± she said. Louis''s lips tightened. That pretty much proved she¡¯d read the poem, but he wasn¡¯t ready to hand it over yet.


    ¡°Just tell me who wrote it and I¡¯ll return it,¡± Louis insisted. Ms. Yang frowned, eyeing him as though weighing his worth as a person.


    ¡°Why do you want to know?¡±


    That gave Louis a moment¡¯s pause. Why did he want to know? It wasn¡¯t like this was an awe-inspiring piece of poetry or anything, it was just annoyingly familiar and he wanted to know why.


    ¡°Curiosity,¡± he said. ¡°I¡¯m not angling for anything. I only want to know who wrote it.¡±


    ¡°That¡¯s not an acceptable answer.¡±


    Louis huffed, losing patience. ¡°Look, I like it and want to know who wrote it. Is that so wrong?¡±


    ¡°It¡¯s wrong of you to have read it in the first place,¡± she said. ¡°He doesn¡¯t need you making everything worse. Hand it over.¡±


    ¡°What?¡± Louis asked, completely lost at this point.


    Ms. Yang had this way about her that, even though she looked like a preschool teacher, made you feel like you were in trouble. Maybe it was that she made you feel like a preschooler.


    ¡°He¡¯s not a world-class musician, but he¡¯s a good actor. Better than you, actually,¡± she said giving him a significant look. Louis didn¡¯t know when this turned from trying to get the identity of a poet to a critique on his acting, but he didn¡¯t particularly appreciate it.


    ¡°So he¡¯s one of the actors? Is he someone who auditioned?¡± Louis guessed. Though, if that was the case, Louis was even more affronted by that assertion.


    ¡°I didn¡¯t say it was a he,¡± Ms. Yang said.


    ¡°Yes, you¡ª¡± Louis began, though she¡¯d said it with such conviction, that he wasn¡¯t sure anymore. ¡°Who wrote it, then?¡±


    Jennifer studied him with narrowed eyes before saying icily, ¡°It¡¯s your fault that he screwed up anyway. You wrote him a very mean letter at a very impressionable age."


    Louis was pretty sure she was fishing for something now because she was winding him in circles and he still had no fucking clue what she hoped to find out. Louis couldn¡¯t even remember the last time he wrote a letter let alone sent one.


    ¡°What are you talking about?¡±


    ¡°He was only five,¡± she said, ¡°and you told him that his lyrics sucked.¡±


    Five? He didn''t think that there was anyone that young in the cast. Unless it was years ago? And then it clicked.


    ¡°But if you go watch The Wake of War," Jennifer continued, "you¡¯ll see what I mean. And after that, you¡¯ll give him a second chance.¡±


    If you encounter this story on Amazon, note that it''s taken without permission from the author. Report it.


    Louis just stared for a moment. ¡°I¡¯m not in charge of casting,¡± he said, ¡°and I can¡¯t be bribed, even if I was.¡±


    Ms. Yang gave him a condescending pat on the arm, then walked away, seeming to have forgotten about the poem clutched in Louis''s hand. What were the odds, after all these years, that he''d run into this poem again? This song.


    Louis folded the paper neatly and tucked it away again.


    *****


    The letter burned in Louis''s pocket for the rest of the day and as soon as he got back to Rosemarie¡¯s place, he kissed her on the cheek then ran up to the attic where she kept all of the old photo albums and lists of accomplishments throughout his career. It was a bit tacky, but he appreciated it now in a way he never had before. He was almost certain that it would be here.


    He was half way through the last box when Rosemarie shuffled up the ladder. She perched gingerly on the edge of the trap door and Louis spared a moment of concern for her. It must be a bad day today.


    ¡°What are you looking for?¡± she asked. Louis let out a breath, trying not to let it show just how disappointed he was not to find the letter in this mass of junk.


    ¡°Just a letter,¡± he said. ¡°I was hoping that you¡¯d kept it.¡±


    Louis didn¡¯t know now how he had forgotten it. It wasn¡¯t like he had obsessed over it, but he kept it all through his time in Starfly. Had it really been so long since he read it that he couldn¡¯t put two and two together without Ms. Yang¡¯s help?


    It was the only reason he kept on with Starfly, even after his dad died and Rosemarie became his primary guardian, even after the public criticism and the difficulties on set. He didn¡¯t remember what he¡¯d said in response to it, but he didn''t have a hard time believing Ms. Yang''s assessment of it being "very mean." He had not been a very tactful child.


    ¡°The one from your little fan?¡± she asked, smiling fondly. Louis''s head snapped up.


    ¡°You remember it? Do you still have it?¡± he asked hopefully. She nodded, then gestured him back down the ladder. Louis closed the boxes and returned the attic to its normal state before following her.


    ¡°I keep my favorite bits of memorabilia in the bookshelf,¡± she said, ¡°you know that.¡±


    ¡°Yeah, but I didn¡¯t think that you kept my fan mail in there,¡± he said.


    ¡°It¡¯s less that it¡¯s your fan mail and more that it¡¯s fan mail from a five-year-old. It was some of the first you ever got, too. I think it was sweet. He wrote you a song!¡±


    ¡°I think I wrote something awful back,¡± he said, flushing slightly. Rosemarie gave him that long-suffering but fond look she got when he admitted he¡¯d done something wrong.


    ¡°You were only seven,¡± she said. ¡°And you were always a very serious child.¡±


    Louis shrugged, he couldn¡¯t deny that. He was still pretty serious, he thought. He didn¡¯t do casual emotiveness well, especially not with strangers.


    ¡°Here,¡± Rosemarie said, pulling out a thick album with a paisley cover and his name written in Rosemarie¡¯s neat handwriting. Looking at it, Louis was suddenly overcome with an overwhelming fondness for his sister. He stepped up behind her and wrapped his arms around her shoulders pressing a kiss to her cheek as she opened the album.


    Rosemarie laughed. ¡°I didn¡¯t know you¡¯d be that grateful that I kept all of your embarrassing moments for posterity,¡± she teased.


    Louis laughed. ¡°I love you.¡±


    ¡°Love you too, Lou,¡± she said, reaching back to pat his head.


    ¡°I know,¡± he said, finally releasing her so they could go sit on the couch and look through the album.


    They laughed at a couple of the pictures of Louis pouting or crying on the set of Starfly. It was strange to see now, but he had been so small when he started out there. He¡¯d been the son of the famous Jason and Crystal Greene, and his parents had wanted one of their children to carry on their legacy.


    Rosemarie had flat out refused after the age of ten to do it¡ªor so Louis had been told¡ªand it had been forced upon Louis. But unlike Rosemarie, Louis had embraced it. For all his crying and complaining, he had loved it. He had loved it against all odds. He remembered being proud of the things he created and about being part of something bigger than just himself.


    ¡°Here it is,¡± she said, flipping to a page about three quarters of the way through the album. Louis touched the yellowed piece of printer paper. The words were written in large, childish hand, but clearly legible, which Louis thought was pretty impressive for a five-year-old.


    ¡°Attacus atlas,¡± Louis muttered.


    ¡°It¡¯s a type of moth,¡± she said. ¡°I had to look it up.¡±


    Louis chuckled. ¡°I know, so did I. What does a five-year-old know about moths? And this was before the internet.¡±


    ¡°Apparently the same kind whose parents let him watch Starfly,¡± she said. ¡°My lord, it never occurred to me what exactly went on in that show until I re-watched it.¡±


    ¡°I was fifteen before you let me watch it,¡± Louis pointed out.


    Rosemarie laughed. ¡°I¡¯d forgotten that.¡±


    ¡°Not that I mind,¡± Louis said. ¡°I still can¡¯t watch anything I''m in.¡±


    ¡°You shouldn¡¯t be embarrassed about your acting,¡± she said. ¡°You¡¯re wonderful.¡±


    ¡°Apparently not as wonderful as moth-boy, though,¡± Louis said. ¡°His friend chewed me out about this letter. I guess he tried out.¡±


    Rosemarie frowned. ¡°Oh? Who was it?¡±


    ¡°I don¡¯t know,¡± he said, looking over the letter. ¡°It''s signed Davie Truman, but no one by that name auditioned.¡±


    Rosemarie frowned. ¡°You said David Benton from Lust Story auditioned! He could have been a Davie.¡±


    ¡°Yeah, but his name isn¡¯t David Truman," Louis said, grimacing. "He was awful, too. It pisses me off just thinking about it.¡±


    ¡°Language,¡± Rosemarie scolded. ¡°Benton might be a stage name. Maybe he was having a bad day. Were there any other Davids there?¡±


    ¡°No. Just Benton. And if that is the same Davie, I¡¯m not sure why Ms. Yang thinks he deserves a second chance,¡± Louis said.


    He pulled the second set of lyrics out of his pocket and his heart gave a thump that resonated through his chest. Could it be the same David? And what did it matter if they were the same or not? Was it such a crime to be a bad actor?


    Louis felt a little ashamed of his judgment, even as he wondered if there was a way to engineer a meeting with him. Even if he was in charge of casting, which he most assuredly wasn''t, he wouldn¡¯t go so far as to give a role to someone who didn''t deserve it¡ªhe had more professionalism than that¡ªbut he desperately wondered what kind of person this kid had grown into.


    ¡°She said to watch The Wake of War. I guess he¡¯s in it,¡± he said slowly.


    ¡°Oh, I know that one!¡± she said. ¡°I don¡¯t remember David Benton being in it, though.¡±


    ¡°Does it have vampires?¡± he asked with a sigh. She laughed.


    ¡°No, it¡¯s a historical drama,¡± she said. ¡°It was pretty good, but I don¡¯t think you¡¯ll like it.¡±


    ¡°Why not?¡± he asked, indignant. She gave him a patronizing look.


    ¡°It¡¯s historically inaccurate and it¡¯s a romance,¡± she said. ¡°I know how you feel about anything where people kiss.¡±


    ¡°It¡¯s not the kissing that I find repulsive, it¡¯s the lack of realism,¡± he said. ¡°Do you have it?¡±


    Rosemarie frowned, then went into her bedroom to search through a case of DVDs that they probably hadn¡¯t opened since the advent of video streaming. When she returned, though, it was with a successful whoop.


    ¡°Watch with me?¡± Louis asked. ¡°We can order pizza for dinner. I¡¯d say Chinese, but I don¡¯t want to go pick it up in the city.¡±


    ¡°All right,¡± she said, popping the disk in.


    As promised, the movie was both a romance and¡ªpainfully¡ªhistorically inaccurate, but for all that, Louis could see the merit in the storytelling and production value. It wasn¡¯t something he¡¯d watch again, certainly, but he didn¡¯t hate it.


    ¡°Pretty good, right?¡± Rosemarie asked.


    ¡°Yeah, I guess,¡± he said, ¡°but I didn¡¯t recognize anyone in there.¡± He was surprised at his disappointment over that. He had been hoping that someone would jump out at him. He¡¯d even been keeping his eye out for David Benton. Maybe Davie had changed his first name. Louis didn¡¯t recall a Truman showing up for the auditions, either, though.


    ¡°Well, let¡¯s look up the cast list, then,¡± Rosemarie said, pulling out her phone to check online. ¡°Maybe you¡¯ll recognize the names.¡±


    ¡°Oh,¡± she said, pausing after a moment¡¯s scrolling.


    ¡°What?¡±


    ¡°It was him! David Benton,¡± she said. ¡°He was the little soldier, Morgan Wittemore. I didn¡¯t even recognize him with that hair.¡±


    ¡°Bullshit,¡± Louis said, grabbing for her phone.


    ¡°Language,¡± Rosemarie warned, handing the phone to him anyway.


    Sure enough, David Benton was Morgan Wittemore, though his hair was dyed black and either he wore contacts to the audition this morning or he was wearing them in the movie, because the thing Louis remembered most clearly about him was how strikingly blue his eyes were.


    Staring at the photos, though, he could definitely see that it was him. Younger, certainly, but recognizable if you knew who you were looking at.


    ¡°He was actually very good. Not as good as you, but still good,¡± Rosemarie said. ¡°I don¡¯t think I¡¯ve see him in anything else. He has a lot of commercials, modeling, and a couple side roles listed, but this is the only notable film he¡¯s been in.¡±


    ¡°Hmm. This was made when he was, what, seventeen?¡± Louis asked, doing some quick mental math. ¡°It says he¡¯d only been active since the year before.¡±


    ¡°You sound impressed,¡± she said, smiling. ¡°Thinking of casting your vote?¡±


    ¡°I¡¯m only surprised because he gave the worst audition that I¡¯ve ever witnessed. He walked out half way through,¡± Louis said dryly.


    It was truly a terrible audition, but after watching him in this, Louis couldn¡¯t help but wonder if maybe there was more in him than just the one role. Allowing for bias, Ms. Yang¡¯s insistence, too, made him curious to see what would happen. But was he curious enough to waste Nabila''s time¡ªlet alone valuable filming time¡ªif The Wake of War was just a fluke and he really was as bad as he had been at the auditions?


    ¡°It¡¯s intriguing at the very least,¡± Rosemarie said. ¡°If you still haven''t found your Marcus Lazarus, maybe you should ask Nabila to give him another try.¡±


    ¡°Ms. Yang did say that his performance at the audition was my fault,¡± Louis admitted. ¡°Apparently he¡¯s still holding a grudge about the letter I sent.¡±


    Rosemarie¡¯s eyes went wide and she let out a delightful laugh. ¡°Is that what sparked this? What on Earth did you write to that poor boy? Oh, Lou, only you could turn your smallest fan into an antagonist with one letter. I guess I never taught you tact.¡±


    ¡°You have to have tact to teach it,¡± Louis bit back, though it was mostly in jest. Rosemarie ruffled his hair.


    ¡°It''s really the same Davie?¡± Rosemarie mused, tilting her head. ¡°What a small world.¡±


    ¡°I found a poem on set¡ªlyrics, maybe¡ªabout an Atlas moth being eaten by a kingfisher,¡± Louis said. ¡°I guess he''s a friend of Ms. Yang''s. She didn¡¯t name him outright, but she told me to go watch the movie. And that he''s a better actor than I am.¡±


    Rosemarie pursed her lips in a show of sisterly pride. ¡°I don¡¯t know about that, but you should talk to him. Make friends or something.¡±


    Louis cocked an eyebrow at her. ¡°I¡¯m not in kindergarten.¡±


    Rosemarie just looked at him, eyes turning sad.


    ¡°Maybe not, but you need more friends, Lou.¡± The implied, because I¡¯m not going to be here forever, hung heavy in the air. Louis leaned back on the couch, handing her phone back to her and wrapping an arm over her shoulders. Rosemarie took it, scrolling up and down the page for a moment before she snickered at something.


    ¡°He has a quote about you,¡± she said. Louis looked over. ¡°He says that you¡¯re the actor he¡¯d most like to work with. I guess he''s still a fan after all.¡±


    ¡°That¡¯s just weird,¡± Louis said to mask the way his heart was pounding in his chest. ¡°Besides, he looked more disgusted than excited to see me this morning.¡±


    ¡°You were probably doing that thing with your eyebrows that makes you look like you¡¯re plotting murder,¡± she said, running a thumb over the furrow in said brows. ¡°Yes, that one.¡±


    ¡°I¡¯ll talk to Nabila,¡± Louis said after a long moment during which Rosemarie stared him down in a way that was probably trying to convey that he should play nice and go make friends.


    *****


    ¡°Nabila, I have a favor to ask,¡± Louis said the next morning. She looked at him expectantly and Louis tried to think of a reasonable way to ask. ¡°I¡¯d like to review the tapes again.¡± It wasn¡¯t quite what he wanted, but that was somewhere to start.


    ¡°All of them, or just the final list,¡± she asked. Louis hesitated for a moment.


    ¡°The same ones we watched last Tuesday.¡±


    ¡°All right, they¡¯re in the back. Want me to watch with you?¡± she asked.


    Louis wanted to refuse, but he was pretty sure it would be easier to convince her if her last impression of David wasn¡¯t him stuttering as he walked out the door half way through the reading. Not that Louis was entirely sure he wanted to give David another chance either, but his gut feeling was that he needed to at least check out the resources at his disposal. He''d even pulled up a couple episodes of Lust Story, just to see what David was like in that context.


    ¡°All right. Do you have a moment during lunch?¡±


    *****


    When Louis finally made it to the viewing room after a chaotic morning of filming, Nabila was already waiting with the auditions queued up. Louis took a seat in the chair next to her and took out a pad and paper, intent on analyzing all of them, just to be sure that he was being objective about his assessment.


    None of them had improved with time.


    ¡°David Benton¡¯s is still the strongest audition,¡± he said slowly. ¡°But he really... Didn¡¯t hit the mark on the in-person audition.¡±


    Nabila snorted. ¡°To put it mildly.¡±


    ¡°What do you think about giving him a second chance?¡± Louis said.


    ¡°Why?¡± Nabila asked, watching him critically. It was true that there was no rational reason to give him a second chance. But Louis just had a feeling.


    ¡°Because I watched a movie last night,¡± Louis started carefully. ¡°The Wake of War. He was in it and he was good. Not just good, he was very good.¡±


    ¡°That could have been a fluke,¡± she pointed out. ¡°He¡¯s made two terrible impressions on me so far, once with Lust Story and once in person, then one mediocre impression with this tape.¡±


    "You watched Lust Story?" Louis couldn''t help but ask, then shook his head. "Never mind. My impression of him wasn''t strong, either, but I had a conversation with Jennifer Yang yesterday, too."


    ¡°Jennifer?¡± Nabila asked, her curiosity seemingly piqued.


    ¡°You know her, then?¡±


    ¡°Of course I know her, I know the heads of all the departments working on this production.¡±


    ¡°Would you agree that she''s pretty straight forward? Objective, even?¡± he asked.


    Nabila nodded.


    "She knows David Benton," he said, not sure if that information would sway in David''s favor or not, "but she told me to watch The Wake of War and said that David Benton was actually a good actor if I¡ªyou, really¡ªwould give him a second chance."


    "I can''t cast a role based on liking an actor''s friend," Nabila said, her expression close to being disappointed in him.


    Louis shook his head quickly. "That''s not what I''m asking, it''s not what I want, either. But you are short on time and options and after watching The Wake of War, I could see that there was at least potential there. I''ve been wondering since then if the audition might have been the fluke. I''ll defer to your judgement, of course, but what¡¯s the harm in calling him in one more time?¡±


    ¡°We¡¯re running out of time, that¡¯s what,¡± she said.


    ¡°Then call him in for the screen test with the other two options,¡± he said. ¡°It might be a waste of five minutes, but we''re grasping at straws and if he can pull off another performance like The Wake of War...¡±


    ¡°I''m beginning to believe those rumors that this production is cursed,¡± Nabila muttered, rubbing a finger over her temple.


    Louis hummed in sympathetic agreement. ¡°Like you said, we¡¯re out of time. If he¡¯s still awful, we just hire one of the other two. But if he¡¯s not...¡±


    Nabila sighed, but nodded. ¡°Jennifer Yang has always been sensible and honest in the past. And so have you. If you honestly think that he''s worth another shot, I¡¯ll give him another chance.¡±


    ¡°I¡¯d say you won¡¯t regret it, but honestly I¡¯m not sure,¡± Louis said, quirking an eyebrow at her.


    Nabila laughed, but it was settled.


    Louis tried to ignore the nervous energy settling in his stomach as he thought of those blue eyes again and the letter tucked safely away in his bedside table at home.

 Chapter Five

    ¡°You¡¯re kidding,¡± David muttered to himself, hunched over his phone in the dark, eyes wide as he stared at his email. His hand scrabbled over the night side table and he cursed when he didn¡¯t find his phone only to remember he was already holding it. He dialed Jennifer right way, uncaring that it was past three in the morning and she¡¯d be pissed off at him.


    ¡°Jennifer!¡± David began when she grumbled a death threat, then stalled out. He wished he could go check his email again, except his phone was still pressed against his ear. ¡°Jennifer, Katherine just emailed me.¡±


    ¡°What? Why do I care? Why do I care at¡ªthree fucking thirty in the morning?¡±


    ¡°No, you don¡¯t understand,¡± he said, then paused. ¡°Or maybe you do. Did you blackmail them? If you did, thank you, that''s so sweet. Holy shit. They¡¯ve called me back in for a screen test!¡±


    ¡°What are you going on about?¡±


    ¡°On Night Mist! They¡¯ve called me in for a screen test!¡± David said, only realizing he was yelling when someone next door thumped loudly on the wall. David winced, then continued more quietly. ¡°They want me to come in tomorrow morning to do another audition.¡±


    ¡°Were their choices really that bad?¡± Jennifer asked though she didn¡¯t sound quite as homicidal anymore. David took that as a good sign.


    ¡°She only just got the email and forwarded it to me immediately,¡± David said. ¡°Should I go? Even though I can never show my face there again?¡±


    ¡°You will go or I will end you and then fire you for calling me at three thirty in the morning,¡± Jennifer said. ¡°Now go to bed. Jesus. Why are you still up anyway? Don¡¯t you sleep?¡±


    ¡°Not really,¡± David said absently. ¡°Good night. Talk to you tomorrow.¡± He hung up before he could hear her reply and pulled up the email again.


    It was all shocking given his abysmal performance, but the last line is what really caught him off guard. I recognize you parted upon saying that you weren¡¯t interested in the role, but you¡¯ve been asked to return by special request of Louis Greene.


    The email had been signed by Nabila Salim and David wasn¡¯t sure which was more astonishing. That he had received an email from the director herself, or that he had been asked to return by Louis Greene. The more he thought about it, the less sense it made, but he supposed now was not the time to look a gift horse in the mouth. He would go in there tomorrow and blow this audition out of the water.


    Or go down in a blaze of glory.


    Then he would come home and cry because, realistically, there was no way this was going to end well.


    *****


    David walked to work the next day, needing time to calm his nerves before the audition. It was ridiculous to be so anxious about an audition. He had been doing this for years and was more than used to rejection. But somehow this felt like the most nerve-racking thing he had ever done.


    Jennifer was waiting for him outside the studio, looking unimpressed by his appearance. David figured it couldn¡¯t be any worse than the impression he had made the last time. His nose was chilled and he probably looked very pink underneath his hat, but he was feeling marginally better after having had some time to cool down.


    ¡°They¡¯ll be filming it this time,¡± Jennifer said. ¡°So just remember that whatever you do will be immortalized on film.¡±


    ¡°Thanks, that¡¯s not helpful,¡± he said, glaring at her.


    ¡°Your in-person acting skills are lackluster, Davie,¡± she said, ¡°but you have always been good behind a camera.¡±


    ¡°If you say so,¡± David said. It was almost time for the audition and he was starting to get nervous again. She was right, though. It was always easier for him to act when he could imagine the end product. The camera always helped with that.


    Taking a deep breath, David entered the waiting room. Two other men were already inside, lounging on couches. David perched gingerly on a chair and waited.


    And waited.


    And waited some more.


    They were clearly going in reverse alphabetical order, or from most promising to least, because David was the last one to be called. His foot bounced rhythmically as he waited for his name. It couldn¡¯t have taken all that long with only two other people, but it felt like forever.


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    Finally, Nabila Salim popped her head out of the door. ¡°David Benton,¡± she called. David ignored the sinking feeling in his stomach. He smiled at her and shook her hand.


    ¡°I¡¯d like to thank you for asking me back,¡± he said, meeting her eyes and then the dark figure standing behind her. ¡°I realize that my last audition ended catastrophically.¡±


    ¡°Well,¡± Nabila hesitated, then just gestured him into the room. The fact that she couldn¡¯t even politely refute his statement without outright lying made David want to laugh.


    Suddenly, the tension from before eased just a little. This was familiar. He could do this.


    As he entered the room, he spotted Louis Greene standing there watching. The man gave him a polite nod and David returned it with a smile. Louis Greene was still every bit as tall, sleek, and professional as before, but knowing that he had asked for David to come back made him seem, if not less intimidating, then at least a little more intriguing. For now, David would let his curiosity overwhelm his nerves.


    ¡°Did you receive your copy of the script?¡± Louis asked.


    David shivered at the timbre of his voice. It wasn¡¯t that it was particularly deep, but there was a resonance that made everything he said sound important.


    This is just another professional, no need to be nervous, David reminded himself. He nodded, pulling out the folded paper from his back pocket.


    ¡°I did, thank you,¡± he said, meeting Louis''s eyes like a normal human being. Acting. Yes, he could do this. ¡°I had a quick question, though,¡± he said, gesturing to a section half way down the scene. ¡°I¡¯m assuming that the characters know each other, is this a reunion of old nemeses, or newer acquaintances who are still assessing one another?¡±


    Nabila gave him an assessing look before saying, ¡°Both. They¡¯ve met a handful of times, but they aren¡¯t well acquainted.¡±


    David nodded, ¡°Thank you.¡±


    ¡°If you¡¯re ready, then,¡± Nabila said.


    Louis''s character began, saying something about the last time they met. David pictured the scene presented in the script. He saw the vine-covered police station, Don Christoph, leaning over Detective Marcus Lazarus¡¯ desk, his lips back in a perfect snarl. David glanced up at Louis and, all at once, it wasn¡¯t Louis at all. Across from him was a centuries old vampire, glowering at him with dark eyes.


    ¡°I know why you¡¯re here,¡± Marcus snapped. This seemed to take Christoph by surprise, there was a brief hesitation in those dark eyes before Marcus continued. ¡°And you aren¡¯t going to get away with it. Not in my town. They might overlook your offenses,¡± Marcus jabbed a finger at the station at large, ¡°but that ends here.¡±


    ¡°You have no idea what you¡¯re dealing with here, kid,¡± Christoph snarled, though the man couldn¡¯t be more than a couple years older than him. Marcus could feel the tension in the room ratcheting up a notch. His fist clenched as he met the madman¡¯s eyes.


    ¡°Neither do you,¡± Marcus said. ¡°I¡¯ve got the law behind me.¡±


    Christoph straightened, his lips twisting in a sneer. ¡°There are people dying here. Do you really think that this is the time for pissing contests?¡±


    ¡°What did you say?¡± Marcus demanded, stepping closer Christoph so that they were mere inches apart.


    ¡°I said that you are getting people killed.¡±


    The words were ice down Marcus¡¯ spine.


    ¡°Get out,¡± Marcus said, voice going cold. ¡°We¡¯re done with this farce of a partnership. Get out.¡±


    There was a moment of pause as the two men stood mere breaths apart, neither willing to be the first to break eye contact.


    ¡°Cut,¡± Nabila called.


    David snapped out of the scene with a sharp breath. He tore his eyes from where they were still connected as if by magnetic force to Louis''s. He turned his attention to Nabila, hoping for some sort of feedback. He had gotten so wrapped up in the scene, that he had stopped paying attention to how his acting was.


    ¡°Thank you,¡± Nabila said and David¡¯s heart sank a little.


    David nodded his thanks, but before he could leave, Louis''s hand shot out to catch his elbow. David looked up at him with a frown. Louis was staring at him with intense eyes and David¡¯s heart thundered.


    ¡°What changed?¡± Louis asked before David could speak.


    David let out a breath as he considered. ¡°I got caught up in the audition last time, instead of the role.¡± David gave them a sheepish smile. This answer seemed to satisfy Louis who nodded and finally released David''s elbow, taking a step back.


    ¡°If you¡¯ll wait in the lobby for a few moments, someone will be out to speak with you,¡± Nabila said. David nodded, shaking her hand and then Louis''s¡ªand trying not to freak out over the fact that he had just acted out a scene with his childhood idol.


    David¡¯s leg started bouncing compulsively as he sat with the other two actors who were casually chatting. This was going to be another long wait.


    *****


    David Benton had just delivered one of the best screen tests Louis had ever taken part in. He was still wondering if it was a fluke when Nabila closed the door behind him and took a seat at the table. Louis frowned at the door for a moment longer before joining her.


    ¡°You may have been right about him,¡± she said.


    Louis resisted the urge to tell her that he no matter what he''d said, he had been caught off guard by the shift, too.


    ¡°How did it look on film?¡± he asked, relieved that he wasn¡¯t the only one who was impressed with the chemistry between them¡ªand the acting, too. It was like he''d walked in as one person and shifted into someone else entirely before the camera. If Louis was completely honest, it wasn¡¯t only Don Christoph that was electrified by the other man¡¯s presence.


    Louis shut down that train of thought before it could go anywhere.


    ¡°Amazing,¡± she said. ¡°I don¡¯t know what was wrong with him last time, but whatever it was, he was good today. I was impressed. If he can keep it up...¡±


    ¡°I felt the same,¡± Louis admitted. David Benton just kept getting more interesting. ¡°I think he¡¯s the right choice.¡±


    ¡°Excellent, I just wanted to get your thoughts before I go announce it. Unless you¡¯d like to do the honors? He was your find.¡±


    Louis raised an eyebrow and shook his head, gesturing for her to go announce the selection to the assorted actors.


    There was a quiet murmur of speech as Nabila broke the news, then a loud, ¡°What, really?¡± that made Louis''s lips quirk.


    It seemed that, even if nothing else changed, even if he was still stuck in this town working on this show, at least there might be something worth looking forward to.

 Chapter Six

    On Thursday everyone pulled extra hours to get David caught up on the show.


    After the initial bewilderment he displayed at being hired, David took to the project like a fish to water. Not only did he manage to perform each scene with aplomb, but he quickly became a favorite with the cast and crew. It was more than being a skilled actor, David seemed to be a genuinely pleasant person. He was outgoing without being demanding, light-hearted and funny while maintaining professionalism, and seemed to genuinely find something he liked in everyone he met.


    Despite his initial reservations, Louis was starting to enjoy working with David, too.


    But one thing still bothered him. While David''s initial discomfiture at the prospect of working with Louis seemed to have faded, he didn¡¯t seem overly friendly toward him, either. He was perfectly courteous and approachable, Louis supposed, he just didn¡¯t approach him. Not like he was wont to do with other cast members.


    Louis wished he would. It wasn''t hard to imagine a pint-sized David writing about moths to someone he admired, but Louis couldn''t fathom why he had written to him. He wanted to ask, but that seemed like a step too far¡ªespecially given David''s initial reaction to him.


    The knowledge that he should keep it to himself did little to satisfy his curiosity, though. Louis still wanted to know more about him.


    He had looked up all of the projects David had been in, but Rosemarie was right to say that there was nothing notable. The only other thing Louis had seen him in was a commercial for body wash, and they hadn¡¯t even shot his face. Just his washboard abs. Not that Louis could fault them for that; David had an excellent physique, even clothed.


    Louis was not the kind of man who made the first move in friendships. He was the kind of person that waited until someone engaged with him and then sorted them into casual acquaintance, friend, or hookup. So it was a shock to himself as much as anyone else when he got tired of waiting and decided to take the initiative himself.


    His opportunity came at lunch time. David sat at a table with a couple other people. Louis watched as Jennifer Yang stood up, smacked David playfully across the head, and left him there grinning after her.


    It was a strange display for multiple reasons, half of them being that his brain had trouble processing Jennifer Yang as being anything but severe and professional, but also because they seemed to be closer than he had originally assumed. The thought bothered him, for some reason.


    Louis watched for a moment to see if David interacted with any of the other crew, but no one seemed to have taken note of him yet so he started wolfing down his lunch while pulling out a piece of crumpled paper from his pocket.


    ¡°Is anyone sitting here?¡± Louis said, setting his tray down across from David. The man looked up at him and swiped the paper off the table so quickly that he nearly took his glass of water with it. Louis pretended not to notice, though he had to tamp down on the disappointment at his inability to sneak a peek. Was David writing more lyrics?


    ¡°Nah, go ahead,¡± David said, gesturing to the seat.


    ¡°How has your first week been?¡± Louis asked, then cringed internally. He was terrible at small talk. David took a moment to swallow the food in his mouth, creating an awkward pause in which David met his eye for just a bit too long. Louis cursed his timing.


    ¡°Good, thanks,¡± he said after a moment. Then, when Louis failed to think of something else to say quickly enough, he continued, ¡°Nabila is amazing. I¡¯ve seen the sets and some of her plans for the episodes. Honestly, I¡¯ve no idea how she put it together. She said that it almost didn¡¯t happen.¡±


    ¡°It almost didn¡¯t,¡± Louis confirmed, grasping at this new topic to start an actual conversation. ¡°We¡¯ve had a slew of problems so far.¡±


    ¡°I heard about Bran Jacobs,¡± David said, sobering. ¡°I was sorry to hear that. I worked with him on The Wake of War a while back. He was a great guy.¡±


    Louis nodded, surprised. He hadn¡¯t realized Bran had been in that movie. ¡°That delay was certainly the most immediate,¡± Louis said before realizing how his words might come across as callous. David just nodded, taking another bite of his beans and rice.


    ¡°What do you think of the script so far?¡± Louis asked, taking a bite of his own lunch.


    David glanced up at him, still looking a little surprised that Louis was talking to him. Louis had to wonder if maybe he was the one who seemed unapproachable. It certainly hadn¡¯t been intentional, he thought he achieved some degree of amiability with most of his coworkers, but maybe not.


    ¡°I think it¡¯s great,¡± David said. ¡°I¡¯m not usually an urban fantasy reader, except for a couple books, but I can appreciate a good story however it¡¯s told.¡± David then went on to list more than a couple books that he had enjoyed over the years. Louis nodded, commenting on the one or two that he had read¡ªmostly due to Rosemarie¡¯s influence¡ªand laughing about some of the stories David told about his time on the set of Lust Story.


    ¡°It was probably the worst career decision I¡¯ve ever made,¡± David admitted after a while, grimacing at his empty plate. ¡°But it was still fun on set. Well, except for the really awful things that some of the characters did.¡±


    Louis''s lips quirked. Sometimes David talked about the characters and the actors like they were two sets of actual people instead of one set of people playing roles. It was... endearing.


    ¡°My sister watched the entire series,¡± Louis said. ¡°She disagreed with some of it, but enjoyed it overall.¡±


    David choked on the water he had been drinking, then laughed as he said, ¡°She was probably the only one. Sorry. Was that rude?¡±


    Louis shrugged. ¡°She likes vampires.¡±


    ¡°Jennifer¡ª¡± David began, ¡°Jennifer Yang, that is, the special effects head. We¡¯ve been friends since we learned to talk¡ªanyway, she told me in no uncertain terms that I was a fool to take that job, but I didn¡¯t listen. It was just supposed to be this tiny show. I had no idea that the marketing team so outstripped the production team. I thought it would just be one of those shows that I could add to my portfolio, sort of break into the world of TV. I didn¡¯t think I¡¯d become infamous for it.¡±


    ¡°Well, you¡¯re here now, so it must have done you some good,¡± Louis said.


    ¡°Or I just have connections that aren¡¯t above blackmail,¡± David said with a wry smile. Louis froze, suddenly wondering what exactly David knew. Had Jennifer already told David that Louis know about the lyrics? Had she told him Louis had them?


    He considered all the possibilities until David continued with, ¡°Honestly, she¡¯s the one who bribed me to catch a flight over here and to go to the audition¡ª¡± he paused, then, his gaze dropping to the table. ¡°I¡¯ve meant to ask, by the way, why did you ask me back after that horrendous audition?¡±


    Louis opened his mouth and then closed it, wondering how much of the story he should tell. He finally settled on, ¡°Ms. Yang came to me and told me that you were a better actor than I am. She then told me to go watch your performance in The Wake of War if I wanted to see it for myself.¡±


    ¡°She didn¡¯t,¡± David said, looking horrified. Louis couldn¡¯t help but chuckle.


    ¡°She did, and it did intrigue me,¡± he said. ¡°I had to see who was good enough to get her that worked up. Your first tape was the best of them anyway, so I figured there was no harm in checking you out.¡±


    David¡¯s cheeks reddened and he seemed to struggle for a response before just shaking his head with a forced chuckle. ¡°We should get back to set,¡± David said at last, then, ¡°Oh, god, I¡¯m so sorry for Jennifer. She sometimes defends my honor too viciously. I think she¡¯s too inured to my faults at this point, she doesn¡¯t understand how everything I get myself into is actually my own fault.¡±


    Louis let his amusement show on his face and shrugged, walking with David to clear their trash away.


    ¡°She seems like a good friend,¡± he said. David nodded, shoving his hands in his pockets as they returned to set.


    Their next scene was the first they would be acting in together and Louis was curious to see how it would go. Their chemistry during the screen test had been exhilarating, but Louis wasn¡¯t sure how much of that was his imagination. Even now, though, he could feel some sort of pull toward David.


    Sure, part of it was physical attraction, Louis wasn¡¯t oblivious enough not to notice that, but there was something else, too. It was an unfamiliar pull, stronger than just wanting to sleep with an attractive man. He wanted to get to know him.


    It was almost like Louis wanted to be friends with David.


    Maybe it was that he wanted to see if the affection that David had for him as a child was still there, or maybe it was just because the more he was around David, the less arduous this whole production seemed.


    Either way, he was going to have to be careful to cultivate this companionship. After his initial surprise that Louis was talking to him, David didn¡¯t seem at all hesitant to converse with him. He didn¡¯t seem to hold any resentment for Louis over the letter he had written, either¡ªof course, David had to realize that Louis, himself, had been about seven when he had written the letter, right? Why would a grown man care about that?


    Louis would just have to be persistent. It wasn¡¯t his MO, but he was an actor¡ªhe could pretend with the best of them.


    Being friends couldn¡¯t be that hard, could it?


    *****


    David wasn¡¯t sure what to make of Louis Greene. He gave the impression of being aloof most of the time, but David had seen him smile and laugh with some of the cast and crew, too. The part of David that liked being on good terms with everyone on set had wanted to approach Louis, but his embarrassment from his audition and the fact that Louis himself had asked for David to come back kept him from taking that step.


    But then Louis had come and sat down with him at lunch. David had been struck speechless for a moment, but after the initial shock, he had been able to get over himself and actually enjoy his costar¡¯s presence.


    And David really enjoyed his presence.


    The chemistry between them seemed to extend beyond the screen, because David found himself opening up to Louis about his experience on Lust Story¡ªsomething he usually reserved for Jennifer¡ªand Louis hadn¡¯t seemed at all perturbed by the fact that David had enjoyed working there despite the bad name. Louis had listened attentively and even laughed at some of David¡¯s stories.


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    Whether it was just professional courtesy, or because Louis actually wanted to talk to David, he had approached him first. That was like tacit permission to keep talking to him, right? It made sense for them to try to get along, anyway. They would be working closely for the remainder of the season and this could be the start of a great working relationship.


    Today¡¯s set was a police station with a typical small-town feel. The scene they were supposed to be filming was the first one where he¡¯d be working directly alongside Louis. As he turned toward the other man, he could see that acting facade falling over his face.


    David was suddenly struck with the realization that he was acting with someone who had been working successfully in the industry for nearly twenty years. David had been acting professionally for the last six years, but hardly ever on anything worth remembering. He was utterly outmatched here and the thought made his heart rabbit in his chest.


    David inhaled deeply, trying to picture the scene in his head. He had memorized his lines last night, but suddenly wasn¡¯t sure if he remembered them all correctly.


    Nabila was giving them some instruction on blocking and the anxious energy was starting to creep up on David again. Louis watched Nabila with complete attention, asking questions here and there and David wished that his ears weren¡¯t filled with buzzing so that he could hear more of what was being said.


    Breathe, David reminded himself, imagine the story. Get into the part.


    David didn¡¯t realize he had closed his eyes to picture it until a warm hand landed on his shoulder. David looked over to see Louis watching him with something that might have been concern.


    It was probably concern more for David¡¯s impact on the show than David himself, but either way, it bolstered him enough to give a half-smile and begin.


    INT. POLICE STATION - DAY


    Marcus sat at his desk shuffling through papers. Odd things had always happened in Shadow Falls but things were getting even more suspicious of late. His brows furrowed as he glanced down at a picture of a recent homicide. It was one in a long line of them. Serial killers in Shadow Falls. Marcus grimaced.


    ¡°What¡¯s this, then?¡± he asked Detective Lindenburg, holding up a piece of paper.


    ¡°Notice from the director,¡± she said. ¡°We have orders to help this guy. Don Christoph. PI. Pretty big name.¡±


    ¡°Bullshit,¡± Marcus snapped. ¡°The SFPD doesn¡¯t work with PIs. Better guess is he¡¯s in the mob¡¯s pocket.¡±


    Lindenburg shrugged. She, apparently, didn¡¯t care that they were working under a crime lord.


    ¡°Speak of the devil,¡± she said, pointing. Marcus looked over to see a tall man enter the station. His brows were heavy over dark eyes and his jaw was peppered with a five-o-clock shadow, though it was barely one. He was dressed less like a crime lord and more like some city slicker. Black turtleneck, black jeans, black boots. Hell, he was even wearing a black leather jacket with a pair of sunglasses folded over the pocket.


    ¡°Detective Lazarus,¡± Don Christoph said to the station at large.


    ¡°That¡¯d be me,¡± Marcus said, standing up so that he wasn¡¯t so dwarfed by the man, then leaning back against his desk with crossed arms. The two men made eye contact, assessing each other for weakness.


    Then Don Christoph smiled, lips quirking in the kind of smile that said he had judged you and deemed you unworthy. Marcus sneered back, eyes locking with Christoph¡¯s.


    ¡°What do you want?¡± Marcus snapped.


    ¡°I hear you are the man leading with the Rockbottom murders,¡± he said, his voice velvety smooth, though there was still a hint of that patronizing smile in his tone.


    Marcus nodded, but didn¡¯t volunteer any information.


    ¡°I¡¯m Don Christoph,¡± he said, holding out his hand. Marcus took it, though grudgingly. His eyes widened a little in surprise. The man¡¯s hand was like ice and he glanced down to see long fingers wrapped around his hand.


    ¡°I believe Director Divato told you that I¡¯d be coming?¡± Christoph said. Marcus didn¡¯t respond except to drop the man¡¯s hand, giving Christoph an unimpressed look. ¡°Tell me what you know about it.¡± Christoph made an unwavering sort of eye contact with him and for a moment Marcus was almost tempted to respond, but then he shook it off, his grimace returning full force.


    ¡°Oh, should I? Because you asked so nicely,¡± Marcus said. He didn¡¯t think he imagined the look of surprise that Christoph gave him. The man probably wasn¡¯t used to having anyone tell him no. Served him right.


    ¡°I¡¯m sorry,¡± Christoph said with a genial smile, ¡°I should have been more clear. It is imperative that I receive the information you have on the case. I believe I made this clear to the director.¡±


    ¡°I¡¯m not about to go around handing out information on an open murder case to every whack-job that walks into this joint!¡± Marcus snapped.


    ¡°Careful,¡± Christoph said, taking an imposing step forward. Unable to move away from that enthralling gaze, Marcus straightened. They were nearly of a height and, standing, they were close enough that Marcus could feel Christoph¡¯s energy pressing up against his own like a sparkler.


    ¡°Cut!¡± Nabila said. ¡°Very good. David let¡¯s try that again, but this time, when you stand up, I want you to puff out more, like you¡¯re trying to intimidate him.¡±


    The spell broke and David turned to Nabila, nodding along to her suggestions.


    By the end of the scene, David couldn¡¯t even remember anymore why he had been nervous. Louis took the job seriously, but he was never disparaging when David messed up, even laughing with him when he¡¯d accidentally asked Don Christoph for his number instead of his card.


    *****


    Louis couldn¡¯t remember the last time he¡¯d had this much fun filming. He¡¯d been a little worried at the beginning when the man had suddenly closed his eyes with a peculiar look, but when they opened again, he had seemed determined.


    In their first scene, Don was supposed to try and fail to hypnotize Marcus, but for Louis''s part, he had almost been the one hypnotized by David¡¯s eyes. He had wondered if they were contacts the other night, but after staring at them for so long today, it was clear that they were actually that shade of blue.


    Next Friday¡ªafter their first full week of filming with their whole cast¡ªthere was to be a small celebration to congratulate themselves on overcoming all of the initial problems on set. Louis hadn¡¯t intended to go, but as he watched David chat with Amelia Sargent¡ªwho played one of the detectives at the station¡ªhe was suddenly caught up in the idea of taking the opportunity to speak more with David.


    ¡°Excellent work,¡± Louis said, coming up behind David as he took a sip of water. He hadn''t changed into his street clothes yet and Louis wondered if he was shooting more today. He couldn¡¯t help himself as his hand came to rest on David¡¯s shoulder. It was probably inappropriate at this stage in their friendship, but David didn¡¯t seem to mind. He turned to Louis with a blinding grin, screwing the cap back onto his water bottle.


    ¡°Thanks, you too,¡± he returned. ¡°I¡¯ve never played a detective before. Kind of an interesting headspace to get into.¡± Louis''s mind went to a completely different kind of headspace and he quickly banished the thought.


    ¡°Are you going to be at the celebration next Friday?¡± Louis asked.


    ¡°Hmm?¡± David asked, tilting his head a little in a parody of a confused dog. Louis raised his eyebrow.


    ¡°Nabila was just talking about it,¡± Louis said. ¡°There¡¯s a cast party after filming next Friday to celebrate our first full week of filming.¡±


    ¡°Oh,¡± he said, giving Louis a sheepish look, ¡°I sort of zoned out there for a second. Sorry.¡±


    Louis rolled his eyes, though he was more amused than irritated. ¡°You should come. It¡¯s at Blue¡¯s Bar in the city. A little out of the way, but they have a great burger there.¡±


    ¡°Oh, in that case I¡¯m in!¡± he said, laughing.


    ¡°We¡¯re car-pooling if you need a ride,¡± Louis offered because, well, carpooling was logical and Louis wanted the chance to talk to David more.


    ¡°Thanks, but that¡¯s all right. I¡¯m sure Jennifer will be going, I can catch a ride with her,¡± David said. Louis just nodded, smiling to mask his disappointment.


    ¡°See you tomorrow, then,¡± Louis said after a moment more, unable to think of anything else to say. David waved and then started walking in the opposite direction.


    By the time he arrived back at home, Louis had thought of exactly seventeen things that he could have said to keep David talking, but of course, at this point it was too late. He parked his car in the garage, checking that Rosemarie¡¯s Acura was still in its spot, meaning that she¡¯d gotten home from her chemo all right. Louis hated it when they had to ask the neighbor to take her because he had work, but there was only so much he could do.


    He entered the house and tiptoed upstairs. It wasn¡¯t late, but if Rosemarie had decided to go to bed early, he didn¡¯t want to wake her. The lights were off upstairs so Louis snuck into the kitchen to find himself a sandwich. He nearly jumped out of his skin when Rosemarie asked how his day had been.


    ¡°Jesus, you scared me,¡± he said, flattening a hand over his chest. Rosemarie gave him an amused look over the rims of her reading glasses. She was curled up on the couch under a blanket with a book open on her knee. The lamp next to her was on the highest setting, which barely illuminated anything. Louis was suddenly worried again. She was usually so full of energy, but today she looked like she was barely holding on.


    ¡°Don¡¯t swear,¡± Rosemarie scolded, stiffly readjusting herself on the couch.


    ¡°Do you want a light on?¡± he asked instead of answering her question.


    ¡°That would be lovely,¡± she said.


    ¡°Have you eaten?¡±


    ¡°I¡¯m not very hungry. I had some juice earlier,¡± she said, giving him an apologetic smile. Louis got her a glass with some cranberry grape juice and set it on the coaster beside her without being asked. She smiled at him when he kissed her cheek and returned to the fridge to make himself a sandwich.


    ¡°I¡¯m still waiting for you to tell me how filming went. How was your new Marcus Lazarus? You said today was your first day filming with him, right?¡±


    ¡°David is...¡± Louis paused, trying to think of exactly how David was. ¡°He was good.¡±


    ¡°I assumed,¡± she said with a chuckle. ¡°You did tell me that Nabila hired him on the spot.¡±


    ¡°Yeah, but that could have been the exception not the rule,¡± Louis pointed out. ¡°No, he was really good. I was impressed. He¡¯s kind of funny, you know. He takes it so seriously, and when he¡¯s in character, it¡¯s a little scary. He seems like a completely different person. He told me during break that he likes to pretend that he¡¯s actually the character.¡±


    Rosemarie raised an eyebrow. ¡°Isn¡¯t that what acting is?¡±


    ¡°Not like that, though,¡± Louis said. ¡°His explanation made more sense, but he said that it¡¯s like suddenly he is the character not just acting as the character. Like roleplaying, I guess. Almost method, but not quite.¡±


    Louis paused to spread mustard on his toast.


    ¡°And that''s not all,¡± Louis continued. ¡°He said he actually rewrites the script every night before he goes to bed. I asked him if he ever takes this to the director and he said that it¡¯s only to help him figure out the story in his head so that he can remember his lines the next day.¡±


    ¡°He sounds dedicated,¡± Rosemarie said. Louis could hear the smile in her voice.


    ¡°He is serious about acting, but he¡¯s also not. He screws up his lines as much as anyone I¡¯ve known, and when he laughs he sets the whole crew off, but then he¡¯ll also keep a completely straight face when something funny happens.¡±


    Louis stopped when he realized he was rambling. Rosemarie was just watching him with a quiet sort of affection. Louis finished making his sandwich and brought it over to the couch so he could sit beside her. She reached out to give his arm a squeeze. ¡°I haven¡¯t heard you talk that much about another person since you were a teenager,¡± she observed. Louis could feel his face flushing.


    ¡°I don¡¯t know,¡± Louis said, answering her unasked question. ¡°It¡¯s strange with him. I like him. I like him as a person. And I don¡¯t like people.¡±


    ¡°The curse of introversion,¡± Rosemarie said, her hand moving up to stroke through his hair.


    ¡°He¡¯s just really... I¡¯m not even sure, magnetic, I guess,¡± Louis said. ¡°Now would be a good time for you to tell me how to make friends.¡± Louis raised an eyebrow at her and she laughed.


    ¡°Wish I knew, Lou,¡± she said, ¡°but I¡¯m sure you¡¯ll figure it out. You were always the smart one.¡±


    Louis rolled his eyes, taking a bite out of his sandwich. ¡°You only say that because you¡¯re my mother. You have to think I¡¯m awesome.¡±


    Rosemarie¡¯s fingers tightened in his hair to give a playful tug. ¡°Excuse me, you ungrateful brat, I¡¯m not old enough to be your mother.¡±


    Louis grinned over at her, making sure he had a mouthful of sandwich just to give the smile that extra air of petulance. Rosemarie gave an exasperated sigh even as she smiled back at him.


    ¡°You¡¯re a heathen. Who raised you? Wolves?¡±


    ¡°The best,¡± Louis said, leaning back against the couch and knocking their shoulders together.


    ¡°It¡¯s good that you¡¯re making friends, Lou,¡± she said more seriously. ¡°You should have lots of people to love you.¡±


    ¡°And to tell me how awesome I am,¡± Louis said, refusing to let the prickle behind his eyes ruin this moment.


    ¡°That, too,¡± Rosemarie agreed. ¡°You should invest time in him if you think he¡¯s worth it.¡± She paused then, giving him a speculative look, her brows wrinkling a little. ¡°But don¡¯t get too attached. If you still mean to leave this place after all this, don¡¯t get too attached.¡±


    Louis studied her features, his stomach knotting coolly. They both knew what she was really asking him not to do.


    It wasn¡¯t that she was exactly disapproving of Louis''s interest in other men, it was more that she didn¡¯t understand it. She didn¡¯t approve of it, either, though, and she tended to stay away from the topic when possible. It was just one of those little things that they didn¡¯t talk about with one another.


    Louis couldn¡¯t complain, though. Everything else was fair game, and avoidance of politics, drugs, and sexuality were a small price to pay for the love and affection she gave him otherwise.


    Louis smiled at her, then stood to clear his dishes away.


    ¡°Don¡¯t worry,¡± he said. ¡°I¡¯m not going to get attached to this town any time soon.¡± He gave her a look. ¡°You¡¯re the only good thing in this place.¡±


    ¡°Such a city kid.¡± Rosemarie chuckled.


    ¡°Anonymity is easier amid a large crowd than in isolation,¡± Louis noted, coming to sit beside her again. She looked pointedly at the sink. ¡°I¡¯ll do them in the morning,¡± Louis said, rolling his eyes. Rosemarie must have been too tired to protest because she simply closed her book and clicked off the lamp.


    Louis stood and silently offered his arm. She took it with a small smile and he helped her into her bedroom, watching as she brushed her hair and got ready for bed. Each time he saw her like this, he wanted to soak it up.


    If this was the last time he saw her, he wanted to treasure every moment.

 Chapter Seven

    The first weeks of filming went without a hitch, but David was beginning to have a little bit of an identity crisis.


    He had always thought of himself as straight, because, well, he¡¯d only ever had one romantic interest and that had been Jennifer in the ninth grade. But he was beginning to think that his interest towards Louis was more than just a desire for friendship.


    A guilty part of his mind wondered if it was some sort of obsession left over from when he was a kid. Though, it probably couldn''t be called leftover if he''d never really gotten over his interest in Louis to begin with. But it was... different now. Actually knowing him was different than anything David could have imagined.


    Before he started working on Night Mist, Louis had been a sort of idol, something desirable but completely out of reach. After meeting him, though, it was even more obvious how ridiculous it was that David was so obsessed with a letter written by a seven-year-old. Louis wasn¡¯t at all condescending or superior about his work. He was quiet, David supposed, and the way he liked to collect other''s viewpoints before stating any of his own opinions could definitely give the impression of being aloof, but he had made an effort to get to know David. It made David feel warm inside.


    David was probably a little bit in love with him. Both in jest and in seriousness. He hadn¡¯t felt like this for another person since Jennifer, and he and Jennifer had been friends for years at that point.


    This had come over him all at once. It was overwhelming and confusing and a bad idea, anyway. Now wasn¡¯t the time to start dating¡ªespecially a coworker.


    Besides, he wasn¡¯t sure if he found Louis attractive per se. He was handsome, obviously, and compelling¡ªall long, hard lines and sharp angles. He had this way of moving, too, that was perfect for the role he played. What vampire could outshine that amount of sensual intensity?


    The best¡ªand sometimes worst¡ªthing about it all was that he seemed to actually enjoy David¡¯s presence as much as David enjoyed his. He had this way of looking at David that made him feel like he was trying to pick pick apart and examine everything that David was. It felt both intrusive and intimate.


    It was common knowledge by now that Louis Greene was gay, but David didn¡¯t want to get either of their hopes up by doing anything stupid. There were too many ways that that could go wrong, even if they weren''t coworkers.


    It was a bad idea.


    David just had to keep reminding himself of that. He wasn''t even exactly sure that he was interested in men. He was just a little more than disinterested in Louis. But that didn''t mean it was a good idea to experiment.


    Jennifer called three minutes before she arrived to pick him up for the cast party. David had to wonder why they didn¡¯t just go for pizza. The pizza parlor was closer and also had pizza. Not that he was against a good cheeseburger¡ªyou¡¯d have to be crazy to say no to that¡ªbut he was tired after a long week and was pretty sure he was going to sleep through his entire day off at this rate. Driving to the city for a cheeseburger seemed a little unnecessary.


    David pulled on a brown blouson and the particular beanie that Jennifer despised most¡ªjust because he could and she hated it, which he found endearing¡ªthen went down to the car. The little orange mustang was humming happily outside the B&B when he got downstairs and David hopped in, ignoring Jennifer¡¯s familiar glare at his hat. He had to duck out of the way when she made a grab for it.


    ¡°Eyes on the road!¡± he snapped.


    ¡°We¡¯re in park,¡± she said, but didn¡¯t try to snatch his beanie again.


    ¡°How has work been going?¡± she asked. ¡°I hear good things about you. You better have behaved.¡±


    ¡°You¡¯re not my mother, you can¡¯t tell me what to do,¡± David sing-songed back at her.


    ¡°I can and I will,¡± she said.


    ¡°It was good, though,¡± David said, buckling his seatbelt before Jennifer pulled back onto the tiny single-lane road.


    ¡°You¡¯ve got to give me more than that,¡± she said.


    ¡°It''s a little overwhelming, honestly,¡± David muttered. ¡°I¡¯ve never worked on a project with someone really famous before. I was sure I was going to make a fool of myself. Well, I did that already, but I mean make more of a fool of myself. But Louis is actually... not so much nice, but kind of respectful.¡±


    ¡°You have incredibly low standards.¡±


    ¡°Shut up, I didn¡¯t mean it like that,¡± David said, though part of him whispered that maybe he did. ¡°He could have been a lot less understanding of when I screwed up¡ªespecially considering the first impression I made on him.¡± David wrinkled his nose.


    ¡°By ¡®first impression¡¯ do you mean your infamous audition or the even worse lyrics you sent him?¡±


    ¡°What? The audition, of course! He doesn¡¯t know about the lyrics and he never will.¡±


    Jennifer gave him an odd look at that, but then returned her eyes to the road. David wasn¡¯t sure what world she lived in that she thought he¡¯d ever in a million years tell Louis about the letter. There were some things that did not ever need to see the light of day.


    ¡°You signed your full name, don¡¯t you think it¡¯s at least crossed his mind?¡± she asked.


    ¡°I signed my full name,¡± David said. ¡°But I signed my full name at the age of five. My name wasn¡¯t Benton at five, it was Truman. And he wouldn''t remember anyway.¡±


    ¡°Then why is it a secret?¡±


    ¡°It isn''t,¡± David said, shifting in his seat. ¡°It doesn''t matter, that''s why I won''t bring it up. I only remember because I was delicate and impressionable at that age.¡±


    ¡°You¡¯re still delicate and impressionable,¡± Jennifer said, nodding sagely.


    David huffed out a breath and glared at her. ¡°How do you like working there? I¡¯ve seen you making eyes at the director.¡±


    That got a faint flush to color Jennifer¡¯s cheeks. Bingo. David grinned. ¡°Who I¡¯ve been making eyes at is none of your damn business.¡±


    ¡°It is so!¡± David protested. "You''re my best friend, I want only the best for you, and you have to tell me all your secrets!"


    "I can replace you," Jennifer said, flipping him off.


    They went on for a while like that, during which time David decided Jennifer was definitely interested in Nabila, but was unlikely to do anything about it. So be it. She knew what she wanted, and if she wasn¡¯t going to get it, that was her prerogative. Sometimes her priorities were a little messed up, but David loved her anyway.


    ¡°I really like working here,¡± David admitted as they finally reached the city. ¡°I didn¡¯t think I¡¯d enjoy it as much as this and it¡¯s only been a week. I¡¯m worried I might do something to mess it up.¡±


    ¡°Just don¡¯t kick the bucket and it¡¯ll be fine,¡± Jennifer said. David made a face.


    ¡°That¡¯s inappropriate humor,¡± David said.


    Jennifer shrugged, unrepentant.


    They pulled into Blue¡¯s Bar, a tiny side-of-the-road establishment, and Jennifer shut the car off. Half the cast and crew were already inside, chatting as they crowded around several adjacent tables. David walked up to Amelia and greeted her. Aside from Louis, Amelia Landing was probably David¡¯s favorite coworker. She was fun and genuinely sweet and reminded him a bit of a rabbit with her constant energy.


    Louis wasn¡¯t there yet, David noted, and, for a moment, wondered if he would come at all. When David asked, Amelia frowned saying that she¡¯d worked with him a couple times before and he wasn¡¯t usually big on the social functions. David was pretty sure he¡¯d implied he would be here, but that was at the beginning of the week. After about thirty minutes, he started to wonder if he had misunderstood.


    He pushed down the disappointment at that. Just because Louis wasn''t here didn''t mean that he couldn''t enjoy his time with everyone else.


    "Is Nabila here?" he asked, as he saw Jennifer casually glancing around, even as she spoke with one of the costume designers.


    Amelia shook her head. "I haven''t seen her, but she should be here. She must be running late."


    As she spoke, the door opened and Nabila walked in, followed closely by Louis. David couldn''t help but grin as Louis''s looked over at him.


    ¡°Sorry we¡¯re late,¡± Nabila said, ¡°my tire blew and I had to call for rescue.¡±


    Louis nodded to a few people as he made his way over to David.


    David watched out of the corner of his eye as Jennifer casually wandered towards Nabila. Whatever Jennifer said, it was clear that she was more than a little interested in the director. It wasn''t often that he saw her so openly familiar with someone else.


    ¡°David, Amelia. Enjoying yourselves?¡± Louis asked as he came to a stop beside him smiling more with his eyes than his lips as he greeted them.


    David practically did a double take. Something was different about him tonight. He looked energetic, younger, even.


    ¡°Of course,¡± David said. ¡°Though I¡¯ve yet to try the cheeseburgers you promised were fantastic.¡±


    ¡°Ooh, damn, I almost wish I could eat red meat,¡± Amelia broke in. ¡°I¡¯d better go find something else to eat before you tempt me into a decision I¡¯ll regret.¡± She wandered off with a wave and David turned his full attention to Louis.


    ¡°You won¡¯t be disappointed,¡± Louis said, shuffling a little closer to David when a waiter appeared, squeezing past him to get to another table. David¡¯s breath caught just a little.


    He could smell the faint scent of aftershave on Louis and his eyes drifted down to the chiseled jaw to see that it was clean-shaven. That was what was different. He actually looked his age without the perpetual five-o-clock shadow he sported. Not that he looked bad either way, just older and a bit more serious with the stubble.


    David swallowed hard, shifting back a little.


    ¡°So you had to rescue the director?¡± David asked, raising an eyebrow.


    ¡°I was driving by when I saw her broken down, actually,¡± Louis said. ¡°I just helped her change her tire. I¡¯m actually late because I had to pick my sister up from the doctor.¡±


    ¡°Oh, is she all right?¡± David asked. He could tell by the expression that flickered across Louis''s face that that was a can of worms he shouldn¡¯t have opened.


    ¡°She¡¯s doing fine,¡± he said after a long pause, though there was obviously more to it than that.


    David didn¡¯t want to pry, but he couldn¡¯t stop the corners of his lips from falling in concern. He nodded, though, and let the subject drop.


    Louis''s eyes roved around the room, taking in the crowd, and he shifted, hands deep in the pockets of his peacoat. He looked uncomfortable, even a bit uneasy. Maybe he really didn¡¯t come to these often. That wasn¡¯t so surprising, he supposed. Louis did strike him as a bit of an introvert, strange as that was in the industry.


    ¡°Want to grab a table, then?¡± David asked.


    Louis shot him a grateful nod and they separated from the rest of the crowd.


    They both ordered cheeseburgers and chatted while they waited for their food to arrive.


    ¡°I¡¯ve wanted to ask you,¡± Louis said, ¡°I watched The Wake of War before we hired you. If it''s not prying too much, I was curious why you stopped acting after that. There¡¯s a good four year gap in your filmography.¡±


    ¡°Ah, well, I guess it was me being a moody teenager.¡± David laughed self-consciously and scratched the back of his head. After Wake he probably could have gotten more work. It would have helped him avoid all of the mess with Lust Story, too, no doubt. ¡°My parents were in the middle of a divorce and acting sort of just fell off my radar for a while.¡±


    This story is posted elsewhere by the author. Help them out by reading the authentic version.


    ¡°Oh, I¡¯m sorry to hear that,¡± Louis said, fingers playing with the stem of his water glass in a way that made David¡¯s neck heat.


    Louis had that effect on him more often than not. The man didn¡¯t seem to be interested in small talk or comfortable discussions; he always cut straight to something of substance or importance to him. It was a little unsettling to be asked to bare your mind to someone so regularly, but it was also reassuring. It was confirmation that Louis was really interested in David¡¯s life. And, in a way, the questions said as much about Louis as the answers did about David.


    It felt intimate.


    ¡°It¡¯s nothing. Looking back on it, it was stupid to let that stop me, but I thought that maybe I could fix it somehow. Yeah, I know that it wasn''t about me at all¡ªthat it wasn''t anything I could have fixed. But I thought that maybe if I played the good kid role, things would work out and nothing would change. I finished high school and applied to college. Don¡¯t know what I was thinking on that front. I have no academic proclivity at all.¡±


    Louis nodded and David laughed, thinking of something.


    ¡°Actually, I think Jennifer is the one who told me not to bother going to college. She said that what braincells I had were best used elsewhere. She¡¯s always been pretty blunt.¡±


    Louis gave a noncommittal hum, cocking his head to the side as he studied David. ¡°I doubt she meant it like that. You don¡¯t strike me as being unintelligent, but maybe that wasn''t where you belonged.¡±


    ¡°Uh, thanks,¡± David said, swallowing thickly as the careful conversation turned into a pregnant silence.


    David was suddenly struck by the fact that their knees were brushing under the table. He may have been reading too much into it, but half of him hoped that Louis would make a move. The other half reminded him that he wasn¡¯t sure he was into men like that and Louis wasn¡¯t the kind of guy to experiment with.


    Louis wasn''t the kind of person that David wanted to enter and leave his life just like that. David was starting to think of him as a friend and he didn''t want to mess that up.


    *****


    It was possible that Louis was not a nice person.


    Throughout the conversation¡ªa surprisingly illuminating one¡ªDavid¡¯s eyes kept flickering down to where Louis fingers toyed with the stem of his water goblet. It was a natural connection to make, and Louis almost wished he had a beer bottle. He didn''t drink, but it was much more obviously phallic and he wondered where he could get David¡¯s mind to go with that.


    As it was, Louis couldn¡¯t help but finger the glass with a little more intention than was completely natural just to watch the flush rise up David¡¯s neck.


    It wasn¡¯t that he was intentionally making a move on him. He¡¯d like to, sure, but that wasn¡¯t all he wanted from David, and to waste the connection they could have as friends on a one-night stand seemed like a shame. Louis didn¡¯t know how to do emotionally attached relationships¡ªfor him it was either or.


    He wasn¡¯t sure if it was internalized shame over his inclinations, a desire to keep them discreet from his sister, or just some failing in himself that didn¡¯t allow him to be emotionally attached to his romantic partners, but for Louis, his relationships were either friends or fucks.


    Still, Louis was curious. He hadn¡¯t heard any whispers of David having a girl and the two¡ªyes, two, in as many weeks¡ªpeople who had asked David out since he got here had been bashfully turned down.


    The way he had done it, though, led Louis to believe that David wasn¡¯t very experienced in romance. Louis thought there was a decent chance he was even interested in men. That thought was more appealing than it should have been for Louis''s innocent intentions toward David.


    David¡¯s knee bumped into his under the table then moved away again.


    ¡°You said that Jennifer bribed you here,¡± Louis said when David¡¯s attention began to wander. ¡°Where did you come from?¡±


    ¡°Oh, I was born and raised in San Francisco,¡± he said. ¡°But I actually moved up north to a little city¡ªwell, it was little at the time; it¡¯s grown a lot since then¡ªcalled Weldstone Harbor.¡±


    ¡°No kidding,¡± Louis said, heart thumping a little harder. If he believed in fate, he might have thought this was a sign.


    ¡°What?¡±


    ¡°I live in Weldstone Harbor," he said.


    David''s eyebrows rose. "I didn''t know that. I guess I always assumed you were in Hollywood or something."


    "The sun doesn''t suit my complexion," he said wryly, rewarded when David laughed. "Are you familiar with The Rose and Thistle? It¡¯s a little bookshop on Main Street. I know you like books.¡±


    David grinned, nodding enthusiastically. ¡°Yeah, I practically lived there. My place was about four blocks down from it,¡± he said. ¡°What a small world.¡±


    ¡°The odds do seem rather astronomical that we both live in Weldstone and somehow found ourselves in this place.¡±


    Louis''s disgust at their current location must have shown on his face because David laughed and said, ¡°It¡¯s charming! There are cows everywhere.¡±


    ¡°Cows aren¡¯t charming,¡± Louis said, though he couldn¡¯t help but smile back. David opened his mouth as though to retort, but then closed it with a shake of his head.


    ¡°I thought you mentioned your sister was here. Did she just come with you or¡ª?¡± David asked, letting the question hang open ended.


    Louis gave a half-smile. He wasn¡¯t really sure he wanted to get into this, but David had been nothing but forthcoming with Louis sometimes tactlessly invasive questions.


    ¡°She lives here. That¡¯s why I¡¯m here, really,¡± Louis admitted, glancing around to make sure no one was giving them any notice. ¡°She¡¯s lived here for about five years now. I took the job to be closer to her. She was diagnosed with leukemia four years ago, and late last year it came out of remission." He hesitated for a moment before admitting. "I wanted to be here with her for as long as I can.¡±


    ¡°Oh,¡± David said, paling a little, and those eyes so wide and full of compassion that Louis couldn''t help but look away. ¡°I¡¯m sorry. That¡¯s... rough.¡± David cringed at his own choice of words and made a face that Louis understood all too well.


    Sometimes there just weren¡¯t words to express what you felt or what you needed to convey to others.


    But he knew what David meant.


    ¡°Thanks,¡± Louis said.


    Their attention turned to the rest of the cast and crew after that, the conversation fading away a little too pointedly. He glanced surreptitiously at his watch. It was almost ten already and Louis was more than ready to escape.


    After being around everyone all day, he was usually more content to leave the crowd and go home to decompress with Rosemarie. Even when he needed solitude, Rosemarie had always been such a natural part of his life that it was just like being at peaceful together. She didn¡¯t count as people anymore, she was more like an extension of himself. He didn¡¯t know what he would do when that was gone. When she was gone.


    ¡°Want to get out of here?¡± David asked, as though reading his mind.


    ¡°Aren¡¯t you having a good time?¡± Louis asked, wondering if he was boring his friend. Were they friends? Louis certainly hoped so, but they¡¯d only known each other for a couple of weeks.


    ¡°No,¡± David said, then frowned. ¡°Yes? Wait, what was the question? That doesn¡¯t matter, I just thought it looked like you were getting fed up with this place. Maybe you could show me around and take me home. You know, if you want company.¡±


    Louis was almost positive that David didn¡¯t mean that last part the way it sounded, but he couldn¡¯t help but raise a wry brow anyway. David¡¯s cheeks colored, but he didn¡¯t comment. Interesting.


    ¡°I can show you,¡± Louis said. He left a tip for the waitress under his water goblet and then stood to say his goodbyes to everyone. Ms. Yang gave Louis a look that reminded him again of a teacher warning off bad behavior when David told her that he¡¯d get a ride with him.


    ¡°See you tomorrow,¡± David said and actually hugged her. Louis still found their easy affection entirely at odds with the woman he had come to know in the preceding weeks, but he supposed that even pastel pit-vipers needed affection. And really, Louis couldn¡¯t talk¡ªhe would love to get his hands on David.


    ¡°This one is mine,¡± Louis said, gesturing to a practical silver Prius. David raised an eyebrow. Admittedly, it was probably a step down from Jennifer¡¯s Mustang, but David didn¡¯t complain as he slipped in.


    ¡°Not the kind of car I¡¯d expect a movie star to drive,¡± he said. Louis gave him a level look.


    ¡°The gas mileage is great,¡± Louis said. David laughed, buckling his seatbelt.


    ¡°Well, I can¡¯t argue with that logic.¡±


    Honestly, it was just the first car he looked at at the dealer. Louis didn¡¯t intend to keep it long.


    ¡°Where to, then?¡± David asked, one hand resting on the window frame as the other tapped rhythmically against his knee.


    Louis felt a wave of fondness at David''s inability to sit for even a second in idle stillness. He seemed to exist in a state of perpetual motion¡ªtapping, fidgeting, clicking, or even humming to himself. The humming intrigued him most of all. He desperately wanted to hear David actually sing. He wanted to hear what those scribbled lyrics sounded like on his lips.


    ¡°I figured since we¡¯re in the city I might take you to Salmon Park,¡± Louis said. He didn¡¯t know a lot about the sights around here, but figured that that was as good a place as any. It was, at the very least, secluded and beautiful.


    ¡°As long as it doesn¡¯t smell like fish,¡± David said, wrinkling his nose. Louis chuckled and shook his head.


    ¡°I think it¡¯s named after the trees. They turn pink in the spring¡ªor so I¡¯ve heard.¡±


    They did visit the park and then the neighboring forest trail. It was scenic and beautiful and everything that Louis did not like, but David seemed pleased. And Louis found that, even though this was not the way he would have decided to spend an evening, having David around was easy. Good. Good enough, even, that it made the park and the chill and the little town, seem a little bit better, a little less daunting. He had that effect on the show, too.


    When they had circled through the woods back to the park, Louis watched David sit down on a swing and start pumping his legs until the chain snapped taut at the end of each arc. David grinned, letting out a bark of laughter and Louis smiled in answer.


    When exactly had he stopped dreading the idea of staying here, of working here?The feeling couldn¡¯t last, he was sure of that, but for now he was grateful for it.


    ¡°Come on, what are you waiting for? I¡¯ll race you!¡± David said, swinging even higher until Louis''s stomach lurched every time he swung back down.


    ¡°You¡¯re already swinging, you have an unfair advantage,¡± Louis called. He didn¡¯t think that he could let go of his dignity enough to actually get on the swing, but it was amusing to watch David do it.


    ¡°Live a little!¡± David called, laughter in his voice. Louis shook his head.


    A little whoop whoop and the flash of red and blue lights had Louis jumping and David nearly falling out of the swing as they both turned toward the patrol car. An officer stepped out and walked toward them, hands hooked in his belt in a way that drew attention to his gun.


    ¡°What are you boys up to?¡± he called out, stopping a good five feet from them. David dragged his feet, sending sand spraying everywhere until he came to a stop, and hopped off. He walked up beside Louis with a wide-eyed expression that probably got him out of a lot of trouble.


    ¡°Swinging,¡± David said, sounding bemused. ¡°Sorry, were we breaking some rule?¡± Louis almost cracked a grin. David had been the one to point out the sign that held the hours and tell it to bite him.


    ¡°Park¡¯s only open until dusk,¡± the man said.


    ¡°Sorry, officer,¡± Louis cut in, ¡°I was just showing my friend around the city. He¡¯s new here and we¡¯re only in the city tonight.¡± The officer looked at him skeptically, but then took a couple steps closer, hand relaxing from his belt¡ªhe¡¯d probably realized they were both white, Louis thought.


    ¡°I¡¯m going to need both of your names,¡± he said.


    Louis stifled a grimace. ¡°My name is Louis Greene. L-o-u-i-s and Greene with a final e,¡± he said. The officer froze where he was pulling a pad of paper out of his pocket. He squinted at Louis in the dim lamp-light. Louis could see the moment he was recognized and his stomach gave an uncomfortable lurch.


    ¡°You aren¡¯t Louis Greene as in Jason Oliver from Starfly, are you?¡± the man said, still squinting at Louis in the dark. Well, that was one way to get out of a ticket, he supposed.


    *****


    Louis practically oozed charm as he spoke to the officer, but David didn¡¯t miss the way his spine stiffened a little at being recognized.


    ¡°Guilty,¡± he said. ¡°You watched it?¡±


    ¡°Every Monday,¡± the officer said, expression turning more amiable. ¡°My wife is a huge fan. She watched it twice through when she was pregnant with our son. I don¡¯t suppose you¡¯d be willing to sign something for her? It would mean the world.¡±


    ¡°Of course, officer,¡± Louis said with a grin. David watched as Louis signed a piece of paper to Janice, and then nodded solemnly to the officer as he gave them a warning.


    ¡°I guess that means it¡¯s time to head back?¡± David asked, glancing at his watch. It was nearly midnight already.


    Louis let out sigh, breath fogging in the night air. He looked really beautiful in the moonlight, David mused. His pale skin and dark hair seemed even more stark without the flush of daylight.


    ¡°Probably best,¡± Louis said almost apologetically.


    ¡°I thought for sure we¡¯d get a ticket,¡± he said, grinning as he nudged his shoulder into Louis''s. ¡°Who gives tickets at a park?¡± Louis glanced at him, but didn''t brush him off.


    ¡°Apparently Janice¡¯s husband gives tickets at a park,¡± he said dryly.


    David chuckled, slapping an easy hand over Louis shoulder as they walked back to the car.


    Louis flipped the radio on as soon as he climbed in and David glanced at him in surprise.


    ¡°Don¡¯t like this song?¡± Louis asked, hand reaching for the dial again.


    David shook his head, smiling to himself. ¡°It¡¯s not that. Jennifer just never listens to music while she drives so I was surprised.¡±


    ¡°Oh?¡± Louis asked. ¡°What about you? Do you like music?¡±


    ¡°I like it,¡± he said neutrally, though he didn¡¯t elaborate.


    David didn¡¯t really want to talk music with Louis. It was irrational, but it seemed too close to jinxing their time together. It was absurd to think that Louis would guess that David had written him a song as a child if David told him that he liked Queen and the Doobie Brothers, but his tongue still wouldn¡¯t move on the subject.


    Louis, it seemed, liked classic rock, because the preset he hit was 101.5, and played a selection of nostalgic melodies that David¡¯s dad listened to when David was growing up.


    ¡°Honestly,¡± Louis said, ¡°I don¡¯t know a lot about music. Most of my taste comes from my sister. She used to play the piano doing classical renditions of iconic rock and pop.¡±


    ¡°Really? She¡¯s a musician?¡± David asked. Maybe that was why Louis had been so opinionated as a seven-year-old.


    ¡°She was for a while. Moved on to teaching some years back, though.¡±


    ¡°She sounds like an amazing person,¡± David observed.


    ¡°She is. She¡¯s an inspiration,¡± he said.


    Louis had seemed hesitant to talk about her at first, but as the night went on, he opened up more about her. David learned that her name was Rosemarie, she was a high school music teacher, she was fifteen years older than Louis¡ªand had practically raised him. He learned she liked fish tacos and that she and Louis could never agree on what to watch.


    And she was dying of cancer.


    David¡¯s heart ached for her and Louis both. He wished that there was some comfort he could offer his friend, but what did one say in the face of inevitable grief?


    The drive back from the city to Midtown fell into a comfortable silence. Louis pulled into the tiny parking lot of the B&B, his car coming to stop in near silence. David looked over at Louis, who still had that strange youthful softness to him and David''s brain caught for a moment before he realized he was staring.


    "See you later, then," he said with half a smile. "Thanks for showing me around."


    Louis nodded and David climbed out of the Prius. He hadn''t made it ten steps before he heard Louis'' voice.


    ¡°David!¡±


    The driver''s side door was open and Louis stood with one foot still inside the car. He beckoned David over with a crook of his finger and David jogged back over, coming to a stop on the other side of the door.


    ¡°What is it?¡± David asked, voice coming out a little breathy.


    Louis leaned forward, a hand coming up to grip the back of David¡¯s neck as he leaned in and pressed a chaste kiss to David¡¯s mouth. David didn¡¯t even have time to react before Louis had pulled away, hand dropping to the frame of the car.


    ¡°Just that. If you want it. Otherwise, it was just part of a strange dream,¡± Louis said.


    David¡¯s brain short circuited. All he could do was stare as Louis gave him a hesitant smile, then climbed back into his car and drove off with a wave.


    It was entirely too long before David realized he was still standing out in the cold holding his keys and realizing that he had managed to lose his beanie somewhere between the park and the B&B. David fumbled for the right key and hurried back to his room, closing the door definitively behind him.


    Well. That happened. Hadn¡¯t it?


    David¡¯s hand pressed up against his lips almost as though to check they were still there. He hadn¡¯t been kissed since... Well, since his first kiss when he was twelve, and nothing had come of that experience except teasing.


    Louis''s lips had been warm and a little cracked and he smelled like that aftershave¡ªsomething sharp and deep. It had been only a moment''s contact, there and then gone again, but David closed his eyes, trying to remember everything about it. It was a bit odd, but it wasn¡¯t bad.


    David''s heart gave a loud thump. He''d kissed Louis Greene. Louis Greene had kissed him.


    It really did seem like part of a strange dream.

 Chapter Eight

    Louis wanted to disappear. He had actually told David that the kiss could be, ¡°part of a strange dream.¡± This was the real fucking world and people didn¡¯t say shit like that. David hadn¡¯t seemed to know what to do with the kiss let alone Louis''s verbal purple prose.


    Louis was still cringing with embarrassment when Monday came around and he couldn¡¯t even talk to Rosemarie about it as part of their don¡¯t ask don¡¯t tell pact.


    ¡°You¡¯re tense today,¡± Nabila said to him when she walked up behind him only to make him jump.


    Louis tried to give her an encouraging smile, but his lips weren¡¯t quite cooperative. ¡°Sorry, my thoughts have been elsewhere.¡±


    ¡°How is your sister?¡± she asked. Louis was surprised. He knew that he was a bit off, but he didn¡¯t think he was off enough for that to be the first conclusion people came to.


    ¡°She¡¯s doing well,¡± Louis said. ¡°She was in good spirits this morning.¡±


    ¡°I¡¯m glad,¡± Nabila said. ¡°I have a few scenes that I want to go over with you and David. Can you two stop by my office sometime today?¡±


    ¡°Sure,¡± Louis said, though he was dreading what David would say when they had a chance to actually talk.


    "Excellent, let David know and figure out when you both have time."


    Louis nodded, waving Nabila off, and wandered back towards the set.


    Louis didn¡¯t know what had possessed him; David had just looked so good illuminated by the porch lights of the B&B that he couldn''t help but want to touch him, to capture that moment in some way and make it his.


    He had probably screwed up royally. To his knowledge, David wasn''t even gay.


    Thankfully, David didn¡¯t seem to be too horrified or repulsed by what had transpired. He was still acting like his normal carefree self, making jokes and chatting to Louis between scenes.


    It was a relief, if not particularly encouraging to the part of himself that was hoping David returned his interest.


    He found David standing off to the side of the set for the police station, a bottle of water in hand. He was dressed in his Marcus Lazarus costume, pressed black pants held up by suspenders and his sleeves rolled up over his forearms. He looked good like that, sensual in a way that he didn''t usually embody. Louis took a moment to admire the long line of his neck as he tilted his head back. Louis walked over to him, and bumped the back of his hand against David''s shoulder.


    ¡°You free around one?¡± he asked.


    David jumped and nearly choked on the water he was drinking. He spluttered for a moment and Louis slapped him on the back.


    Maybe he wasn¡¯t as unbothered by it as he had seemed.


    Fuck.


    ¡°You startled me," David said. "Why?¡± David gave him a bashful smile, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. Louis gestured over his shoulder to where Nabila had walked over to discuss something with one of the cameramen.


    This story originates from a different website. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there.


    ¡°Nabila wants to talk to us. Something about the script, though I don¡¯t know what yet,¡± he said.


    David seemed to relax a little and his smile loosened. "Yeah, that works for my schedule."


    That stung a little, but was to be expected. It was better than he should have expected, really. Louis had overstepped his bounds on Friday. David had every right to be pissed, but he looked like he was willing to overlook it. Louis would just have to be careful not to push him again.


    Despite their short acquaintanceship, Louis was already loathe to give up that easy friendship that had been growing between them.


    At one o''clock, Louis knocked on Nabila¡¯s door.


    ¡°Come in,¡± Nabila called.


    David was already inside, seated on the long, green couch. He gave Louis a little smile as Louis took a seat on the other end of the couch, sure to keep a respectable distance between them as he did so.


    ¡°Thanks for coming in,¡± she said. ¡°As I was telling David, I wanted to talk to you about the direction that the rest of the season is going.¡±


    ¡°Are the scripts for the next episodes ready?¡± Louis asked.


    Nabila shook her head. ¡°Not yet, but I have the outline for the rest of the season." She held up a manilla folder to demonstrate. "As you two are the ones who bring Don and Marcus to life, I want your thoughts on the character arcs.¡±


    ¡°The short of it is, David, do you want to be killed by a werewolf or a succubus? The original plan was for Marcus to die in a redemption arc when facing the succubus in the season finale, but there is some appeal to the werewolf scenario.¡±


    ¡°Hmm,¡± David said with a mischievous smile. ¡°Succubus definitely sounds like the sexier way to go out. But there¡¯s a certain appeal to the werewolf.¡±


    ¡°You¡¯ll be running into a werewolf in episode twelve, anyway,¡± Nabila said. ¡°It¡¯s already implied that you are immune to magic, so we¡¯re going to use it to make it a mystery whether or not you¡¯ll turn into a werewolf.¡±


    ¡°Nice,¡± David said, nodding approvingly. ¡°The succubus is the main villain, correct? Where would death by werewolf come in?¡±


    ¡°The werewolf arc could be extended to the end of the season to create a double whammy at the end,¡± Nabila said.


    Louis tuned out the rest of the explanation.


    None of this was coming as a surprise, so it shouldn''t have been such a shock, but this was the first time Louis had really thought about the fact that David would only be here for the one season.


    Bran had only been cast as a season one regular, so, naturally, David was, too. Louis glanced over at David. For all that he said this job was a dream come true and some sort of miracle, he seemed very calm when faced with the reality of Marcus Lazarus¡¯s impending doom.


    Calmer, in fact, that Louis felt about it. A knot was building in his stomach.


    ¡°I was hoping you¡¯d say that,¡± Nabila said. ¡°Louis? Any thoughts?¡±


    Louis glanced at her then gave a brief shake of his head. ¡°The stronger story arc is more important than personal preference.¡±


    ¡°Agreed,¡± Nabila said.


    David glanced over at him curiously, but didn¡¯t say anything.


    Louis wasn¡¯t sure why it hadn¡¯t occurred to him before this point that Marcus Lazarus was only supposed to be a season one regular. It shouldn''t bother him this much.


    He had been prepared to go through with the two-year contract since before he¡¯d even met David. There was no reason for it to matter so much now. At the end of filming, barring any pick-up footage, David would be gone, probably back to Weldstone Harbor.


    The only upside would be that they would never have to talk about that kiss. Though, for now, David seemed as content to ignore it as Louis was.


    ¡°Well, that¡¯s all I needed. Thank you for dropping by,¡± Nabila said, standing to send them off.


    Louis paused at the door, hesitating.


    ¡°Can I have a word with you alone?¡± Louis asked Nabila. She looked a little concerned, but nodded, gesturing for David to leave first. David met his eyes briefly, but didn¡¯t seem to find it strange.


    ¡°See you on set, then,¡± he said before closing the door behind himself.


    Louis turned to Nabila. ¡°I know that I''m crossing a line here, so I don''t have any expectations, but I have some thoughts on where the show is going.¡±


    Nabila looked more curious than irritated at Louis using his reputation to influence decisions that weren''t his to make.


    "Go on," she said, gesturing for him to sit again.


    David had only signed on for one season, but... well, Louis didn¡¯t want him to leave.

 Chapter Nine

    The next few months were some of the toughest of David¡¯s life, but they were also some of the best. David never knew how much he enjoyed working on TV. The only other television production he''d been on had been Lust Story and that had been an unconventional experience. Having the opportunity to work on Night Mist with this cast and crew, David thought that this might be where he wanted to stay.


    It wasn¡¯t like he didn¡¯t enjoy working on movies and even commercials, but there was something about how tight-knit the crew was and the way that Nabila seemed to be an expert at problem solving and working around the confines of the budget, location, and timing. It made David feel like they were accomplishing so much and forming life-long friendships along the way.


    Besides, the idea of television was comforting to David; as long as there was a next season, there was a potential for more work. Well, if you weren''t scheduled to die in the season finale.


    But all of it was worth it to have been able to meet the people he''d met here. He hoped he''d be able to stay in touch with Amelia afterwards. And Louis.


    He''d been a dedicated admirer of Louis Greene for years, but meeting him, getting to see him as a person and not just a talent, had only strengthened David''s regard. It was probably presumptuous, but David hoped that he could keep Louis in his life even after they parted ways. Even if he wasn''t sure exactly what that would look like.


    David''s stomach still fluttered when he thought of that night, but aside from that, things had gone back to normal between them. The two of them had started talking again like friends, both seeming adamant to pretend that nothing happened that night in the parking lot with Louis leaning over the car door, his eyes sparkling and his mouth quirked in a soft smile before...


    David flushed. Even the thought of it had him feeling more nervous than the time he''d bared it all for his first ever appearance in Lust Story.


    David supposed that Louis must have meant it when he said that they could leave it all in a dream if that was what David wanted. The longer he thought about it, though, the less sure he was that he wanted to leave it at that. But the longer he waited, the less he felt like he could bring it up.


    Louis didn''t seem upset that David had¡ªnot rejected, but more or less ignored his advances. He felt guilty about that. Sometimes he wondered if he should bring it up. But Louis had never brought it up again, either. And, even if he did bring it up, David had no idea what he''d say.


    The biggest problem was that David did want to explore something more with Louis¡ªhe just didn¡¯t want to try something and have it ruin their friendship. Satisfying his curiosity¡ªinfatuation?¡ªwas definitely not worth a friendship that David was coming to value like few other relationships he had. David just couldn''t justify it when he couldn''t be sure that his interest in Louis extended as far as Louis interest in him.


    How did other people know so instinctively what they wanted?


    It had never come that easily to David and until Louis, he hadn''t even questioned it. He''d just assumed he was straight, but now that he thought about it, he wasn''t exactly sure anymore.


    Did David find men attractive in the same way he thought women were beautiful?


    Well, he certainly thought that some men were handsome. Beautiful, even. That didn¡¯t mean he wanted to sleep with them, though.


    Actually, he didn¡¯t necessarily want to sleep with most women, either. In fact, David had never given much thought to sex in general....


    Did he want to sleep with Louis, though?


    That was an altogether easier and much harder question to answer.


    He liked Louis. He really liked Louis. He wanted to be close to him and know him, to be physically affectionate, to hold him, even. David would dearly like to kiss him again, if he was being completely honest.


    The rest was more complicated, though. David thought he may well want to sleep with Louis. Or if want wasn¡¯t exactly the right word, then he thought that he¡¯d at least like to try sleeping with Louis.


    Those were dangerous thoughts, though.


    Louis was a serious and sure of himself. He didn''t seem like someone to experiment with. Louis knew what he wanted and bi-curious didn¡¯t seem to fit the bill.


    And that wasn¡¯t even considering the fact that his sister was dying.


    No, it made David a bit of a dick to even consider it, really. Louis should have something as steady and sure has he was, not David''s general messiness.


    Even if Louis had started it, a treacherous part of his mind whispered.


    Louis wasn¡¯t someone to experiment with. He repeated that like a mantra over the months until the night of the cast party was relegated to the part of his mind that was generally off-limits and best forgotten.


    Their friendship had only grown stronger over the months, and that would be enough for David.


    *****


    ¡°Hey, Lou,¡± David said, taking his rolled up script and ruffling it against Louis''s hair because he knew that it always got him a glare. This time it was only greeted by that odd expression that Louis got when David called him ¡®Lou.¡¯


    He didn¡¯t know when it started happening but Louis had never actually asked him to stop calling him that, so David kept doing it. He liked the way it shortened his name into something easily managed¡ªcutting down on the syllables by fifty percent.


    Besides, no one else called him anything but Louis and David liked that it made them seem closer, like better friends than anyone else.


    ¡°What do you want?¡± Louis asked in that faux brusque manner he donned when he knew David was trying to be obnoxious.


    David sat down in the chair opposite the couch where he was going over his lines. They were on the last week of filming and David was trying to soak it all up¡ªand forget his nerves about what came next.


    ¡°You going to the party Friday?¡± he asked, fiddling with his script to distract his hands.


    One of Louis''s thick brows quirked at the gesture and David tried to get his hands to stop. It was a pointless endeavor. Once his hands got to doing something, there was really no intervening.


    This was especially true when David''s mind kept returning to the last party they had both been to. The party that they had ditched to hang out at a park until the middle of the night and then drive home amidst a quiet conversation and the lull of late-night radio. And then Louis had kissed him in the parking lot.


    David crumpled the script and then smoothed it out again. Louis wasn¡¯t someone to experiment with.


    ¡°I think I¡¯m pretty much expected to show up to this one,¡± Louis said, his expression saying all it needed to about Louis opinion on get togethers. He would probably rather be home with his sister. David could understand that. He would, too, in Louis''s place.


    That didn''t stop David from being glad that he''d be there.


    ¡°It¡¯ll be fun,¡± David said, kicking Louis''s leg lightly with his toe. Louis scowled at him half-heartedly.


    ¡°Parties are never fun,¡± Louis said. "They are loud and unproductive."


    ¡°Yeah, but you¡¯ve only been to one of them with me; I¡¯m always fun,¡± David said.


    Louis''s eyes caught on his with an assessing sharpness and David''s heart gave an almost painful thud, smile faltering. David swallowed.


    ¡°Besides," he continued more seriously, "it¡¯s the last chance to see the crew before the end of the season. You have plans afterwards?¡±


    Louis hummed in the affirmative and leaned back in his chair. ¡°I¡¯ve been invited to a wedding back in Weldstone Harbor. I¡¯ll leave late June. And you? Do you have another job lined up?¡±


    Since the announcement that Louis and David would be the lead roles in this season of Night Mist, David had actually gotten a couple requests for audition tapes and a whole new slew of potential commercials.


    The season had yet to air on Cybervid, but the fact that Louis was in it had definitely garnered some interest. Just not quite enough to have him secure in his future prospects.


    ¡°I¡¯ve got a couple opportunities,¡± David hedged.


    He hadn¡¯t been asked back for any in person auditions, but commercials were still work, so David was taking it as a win.


    ¡°You mean more commercials,¡± Louis said, sounding almost irritated.


    David slumped down in his chair and rolled his eyes, feeling surprisingly defensive. Sometimes he thought Louis forgot that not everyone had abundant success and opportunities.


    ¡°So what if I do?¡± David said, his tone coming out with more bite than he''d intended. "Work is work, and I don''t have the luxury of being be picky. I''m lucky to get the offers I do.¡±


    ¡°You¡¯re wrong,¡± Louis said, leaning forward until he was close enough that David could practically feel the heat of his body invading his personal bubble. ¡°You are good at this, David. And it¡¯s not just a disservice to your own ability that you keep acting in fucking commercials, but a disservice to every production that¡¯s missing you as a key component.¡±


    Their eyes met for a moment too long, Louis entirely too close and saying things that made David''s throat go dry and heat rise in his face. David looked away first and he thought he heard Louis sigh.


    "David," Louis said, "you deserve better than that. Don''t sell yourself short."


    He said it with such solemnity that it made David''s heart ache a little. It was an unfamiliar kind of belief¡ªlike he genuinely thought David had the potential to improve productions.


    But even if Louis did believe it, it didn''t mean it was the truth. And it didn''t mean the rest of the world did.


    ¡°Work is work,¡± David said resolutely. "I''m not above taking what I''m offered."


    ¡°Work is work, but wasted potential is something else altogether,¡± Louis muttered. "You should be finding opportunities that are actually worth your time."


    That stung. David let out a long breath, turning away until he could control his expression again.


    ¡°I have tried, you know,¡± he said after a moment, forcing himself to relax.


    He hated this. Hated admitting that he was still failing, despite his efforts. Admitting to someone with that kind of faith in him that he wasn''t worth it. Admitting to Louis that he wasn''t good enough. That he was still a disappointment.


    "My agent isn¡¯t incompetent, it''s not like I haven''t been auditioning¡ªI''m just not..." David floundered for a moment before shaking his head. "I don''t get parts. That''s just how it is. I¡¯m not sure why Katherine¡¯s stuck around as long as she has.¡±


    There was a long pause during which David resolutely curled his script into a telescope, then unfurled it and started rolling it the other way.


    ¡°Probably because she sees your potential, too,¡± Louis said.


    ¡°Or because Jennifer threatened her. Or bribed her. Or both,¡± David said, half in jest.


    Louis started to say something, then paused with a wry noise that had David glancing over at him.


    ¡°I was about to say that she wouldn¡¯t do that," Louis said, "but, on second thought, I wouldn''t put it past her. If your agent hasn¡¯t seen your talent, though, she¡¯s not a very good agent.¡±


    "I have to be realistic," David said.


    Louis looked like he wanted to argue, but he only said, "What do you mean?"


    ¡°For every job, there are dozens of talented actors," David said.


    He could practically hear Louis''s eyebrows saying, ''Yes, David, that is how auditions work.'' But Louis stayed quiet.


    "What I mean is, I''m not particularly talented, I''m nothing exceptional. There are plenty of other people with more experience and more skill than I have. I''m lucky to have gotten as far as I have. It''s enough.¡± It had to be enough.


    Louis studied David for a long moment, as though he was trying to decode something very complicated. ¡°You really aren¡¯t just fishing for compliments, are you?¡± Louis asked, sounding almost surprised. ¡°You really don''t believe that you are talented.¡±


    Shame crawled over David''s skin and he shrugged. ¡°We should stop talking about this. Things are fine, stop worrying about it.¡±


    For once, David was not enjoying Louis''s insistence on cutting straight to the core of things. He didn''t want to talk about this. It felt less like intimacy and more like letting someone poke around in an open wound.


    ¡°No,¡± Louis said, glancing around to see if they were alone. They weren¡¯t. Just one more reason David did not want to be having this conversation right now.


    Louis stood up and David let out a sigh of relief before Louis hauled him up by the arm and said, ¡°Come on.¡±


    ¡°What do you want?¡± David demanded as Louis dragged him by the arm out of the building.


    ¡°You''re finished for the day, right? I¡¯m taking you home for dinner so we can have a chat,¡± he said.


    ¡°Woah, no way,¡± David said, stopping in his tracks. ¡°We¡¯re done talking about this. Agree to disagree.¡±


    Louis stopped, giving him an irritated look, but didn''t drop his hold on David''s arm.


    "David," he said.


    "Louis," David said, exasperated.


    He didn''t know what his face was doing, but Louis expression softened as he looked at him and he gave his arm a reassuring squeeze. For a moment David thought that he might let him off at that, but then he started pulling him across the studio again.


    ¡°We aren¡¯t done talking about it," he said, "It¡¯s absurd that you have no idea how good you are. Hell, I know I¡¯m good, and you know what Jennifer said to me that started all of this? She said that you were better than I am.¡±


    David''s stomach lurched, face heating. Only Jennifer could say something like that to Louis Greene. If it weren''t for the warmth of Louis''s hand on his bicep, David thought he might have curled up in shame right then and there.


    Louis tugged him all the way out to the parking lot, giving David an expectant look as he opened the passenger side door of his Prius and waited for David to get in. David hesitated. He thought that if he really said no, Louis would probably respect it. Surely he wouldn''t go so far as kidnapping.


    But there was another part of him, maybe a slightly larger part, that didn''t want to turn Louis down¡ªdidn''t want to disappoint him¡ªeven if it meant allowing Louis to pick apart all of David''s insecurities.


    Louis seemed to see his hesitation, because he offered with a small smile, ¡°I wasn¡¯t sure what to think of that at first. I watched The Wake of War and I knew you had talent. Hell, I knew you weren''t bad from what I''d seen of Lust Story."


    Louis rolled his eyes and David''s lip twitched in answering amusement. Louis leaned against the open car door, his hand on David''s arm more of a friendly presence than an insistence at this point. It would only take one step to put them close enough to kiss.


    "But I get it now. I see your skill and your passion every day, David."


    David wished Louis would stop looking at him like that¡ªlike he was something special. It made his heart beat too fast and standing there over the damned door was making it really hard for David to keep his eyes off his lips.


    "David, I know now that Jennifer was right," he said, his eyes soft but serious. "Please, get in the car."


    And David did.


    *****


    The car ride seemed to take at least twice as long as usual. David was clearly upset, almost sullen. It was ridiculous, considering all Louis had done was insist that he was a skilled actor.


    Louis didn¡¯t understand why David couldn¡¯t see it.


    People always assumed Louis was conceited because he acknowledged his own skills, but, really, Louis just knew where his strengths and weaknesses lay.


    David, it seemed, did not.


    That bothered Louis more than it probably should have. David constantly accepted less than he was worth and was almost stubbornly unaware of his value.


    It didn''t help that David took rejection like a personal failure, either, instead of the luck of the draw that it was. Rejection was less a judgment on his acting ability than it was an artistic choice.


    If you spot this narrative on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.


    Though, Louis had to admit that there was room for improvement when it came to David''s auditioning.


    He glanced over at David as he pulled into the driveway, feeling uncharacteristically nervous. David''s expression was curious but neutral. He''d brought David here on a whim, but he''d never brought a man home to his sister before. Not that David was here as a man, so to speak, and Rosemarie wasn''t even going to be here, but it felt significant anyway.


    Louis pulled into the garage and unbuckled his seatbelt, glancing at David again before he climbed out of the car. Rosemarie¡¯s house was two stories and built awkwardly onto the side of a hill.


    It was large and empty and Louis had always thought the architect had been a moron. On more than one occasion, he''d told Rosemarie it was silly to live in such a huge house all alone. It was one of his less tactful thoughts. He knew that she had always wanted a bit, close-knit family. But, instead, she''d only ever had Louis. And Louis had hardly ever been around.


    Louis felt suddenly protective of this house¡ªof Rosemarie''s home¡ªas he showed David inside. It wasn''t that he thought David would be as judgmental as Louis, himself, was, but he didn''t think he could handle David judging it without resenting him a little.


    ¡°This is your sister¡¯s house?¡± David asked as they entered into the mud room.


    ¡°Yeah,¡± he said as he shut the door to the garage with the quiet shushing of the weather strip.


    ¡°Your sister seems to have better taste than you,¡± he said, grinning cheekily over at Louis.


    Louis let out a huff of laughter, shoulders relaxing.


    ¡°We¡¯ll go up to the kitchen in a moment, but you can drop your things in the closet over there,¡± he said pointing to a door adjacent to the garage. While David did that, Louis deposited his own things in his bedroom. It was one of four on the bottom floor, but had been his room since Rosemarie bought the house, despite Louis never having lived here until she got sick.


    ¡°Louis?¡± David asked, poking his head hesitantly into the doorway. Louis beckoned him in and David looked around with open curiosity. The room wasn¡¯t much to look at. He wasn¡¯t very big on decorating, but Rosemarie had added a few things that made it ¡®more homey.¡¯


    ¡°I¡¯m guessing Rosemarie decorated your room,¡± David said, grinning. Not for the first time, Louis wondered if David had some low level psychic ability, because he always seemed to read his mind.


    ¡°Why do you say that?¡±


    ¡°You are the most utilitarian person I know,¡± David said emphatically. ¡°I can¡¯t imagine you putting a glass figurine of a dog on your armoire. Actually, I have a hard time picturing you purchasing an armoire, too. You seem like more of the minimalist-free-standing-clothes-rack kind of guy.¡±


    ¡°Point taken,¡± Louis said, walking up beside David and picking up the figurine. He rubbed a thumb over the sharp point of one of its ears. ¡°She got that because it reminded her of our dog when I was a kid.¡±


    ¡°You had a dog?¡± David asked, his bad mood seemingly forgotten.


    ¡°I¡¯m more of a cat person,¡± Louis said with a shrug. ¡°But Rabbit was exceptional as far as dogs go.¡±


    ¡°Rabbit?¡±


    Louis let out a breath at the inevitable ribbing. ¡°I was three and it had huge ears. I thought it was a rabbit when Rosemarie brought it home.¡±


    David didn''t quite laugh, but the glee was apparent in his face and Louis couldn''t help but smile too.


    ¡°What kind of dog?¡± David asked. Their fingers brushed as David took the figurine, holding it like it was something precious. David didn''t seem to notice. Absurdly, Louis felt a little jealous of the figurine. He studied David¡¯s face as David examined the dog, like it was something more than a piece of glass. Louis had never thought of it as anything precious, but maybe it was.


    ¡°She was a boarder collie,¡± Louis said. ¡°Died just after Starfly ended.¡±


    Everything had happened all at once at that time. It was like the world was telling Louis that it was time to grow up. All of the things that had sustained him through his childhood had come to a close all at once. His mother had been convicted and Rosemarie had decided to move away from Weldstone Harbor. For the first time, Louis had really felt like he was on his own.


    ¡°I¡¯m sorry. She must have been a good dog,¡± David said. Louis looked over to see David watching him.


    Louis offered a small smile. "She was. She knew just about every trick in the book."


    ¡°I always wanted a dog, but my parents never had time. Always wanted a sibling, too, but they didn¡¯t have time for that, either.¡± David made an exaggerated sad face and Louis huffed out a laugh.


    ¡°You¡¯re all grown up now, you can get your own dog if you want one,¡± Louis said, shaking his head. "A sibling might be harder to obtain at this point. But you can find family in other ways, too.¡±


    Louis realized how that sounded a little too late. He hadn¡¯t meant for it to sound quite so intimate. He wasn''t even necessarily referring to David and himself, but he couldn¡¯t take it back, either. Though he''d only known David for nine months, he couldn¡¯t imagine his life without him anymore.


    David put the dog down quickly and laughed it off, though the flush creeping up his neck said that he certainly knew what Louis had implied. Was it a good flush or a bad one, Louis wondered. Part of him wanted to pull David around and find out.


    "I can¡¯t even afford myself let alone a dog,¡± David joked, then flinched, as though realizing he had accidentally brought up the topic he had been trying to avoid.


    Right. There was a reason he brought David here and it had nothing whatsoever to do with bedrooms.


    Louis smiled and guided him back out the door and up the stairs to the second floor, with its open beamed ceiling and enormous windows. Rosemarie¡¯s bedroom, the kitchen, and the living room were on this floor.


    David let out a low whistle as they entered the great room, looking up at the ceiling which was so high it probably could have fit a third floor beneath it.


    ¡°I think it¡¯s bigger on the inside,¡± David said. ¡°This is a beautiful house.¡±


    ¡°This is a terrible house," Louis corrected with a laugh. "I think the architect was a fraud. Have you ever tried cleaning roof beams that are a hundred feet in the air?¡±


    David shook his head, though his expression said it was more pitying of Louis''s world views than in answer to the question. ¡°Leave it to you to appreciate things for their practicality and scorn them for their beauty.¡±


    Louis shrugged. ¡°I don¡¯t mind things being beautiful,¡± he said, unable to stop himself from eyeing David up and down, ¡°I just like them to be practical, too. Things can have more than one function.¡±


    ¡°Sure,¡± David said, shoving his hands deep into the pockets of his jeans, probably to keep from fidgeting.


    Louis still couldn''t pin down the signals he got from David. He thought David was interested, but at the same time, he seemed to steer clear of anything that suggested they might be more than friends¡ªor at least that they could be more than friends.


    At first, he''d wondered if David was just straight, but he had seen no evidence that David had a girlfriend and the way he looked at Louis didn''t seem entirely platonic, either. Besides, if he was, why hadn¡¯t he just said that he wasn¡¯t interested in guys when Louis kissed him? That was what most guys would have done.


    Actually, most guys would have punched him for that. It had not been Louis''s finest moment.


    But David hadn¡¯t punched him or told him he was straight. He hadn''t said anything at all.


    And so Louis couldn¡¯t get rid of the ridiculous hope that maybe David did return some level of interest. Louis wasn¡¯t beautiful, certainly, but he was typically considered attractive and kept himself in peak condition¡ªa sort of necessity in this line of work. He was generally appreciated by the men he slept with.


    Maybe it was just that David had never been with a guy. He could understand that sort of hesitance, but he didn¡¯t really know how to approach the matter with David without scaring him off. So he constrained himself to flirting with him endlessly in the hopes that he might take advantage of it at some point.


    ¡°You can sit at the bar and we can chat while I cook. What do you want?¡±


    ¡°Anything''s good,¡± David said, taking a seat and immediately starting to toy with the little piggy salt shakers. "Just make whatever you usually do."


    Typically, that response would be incredibly unhelpful, but he had known David long enough to understand that David meant it literally. He¡¯d never seen anything that David wouldn¡¯t eat. The man must have at least two extra stomachs. And an incredible metabolism, too, because he was all deliciously lean muscle.


    ¡°Is your sister joining us?¡± David asked, his leg starting up its usual restless rhythm. Louis shook his head.


    ¡°She¡¯s meeting with her book club and that usually goes fairly late." If David noticed the unavoidable scorn in his voice at the words book club, he didn¡¯t comment. Louis wasn¡¯t against book clubs on principle, but when all they read were terrible vampire romance novels, he wasn¡¯t sure what the point was.


    ¡°Oh,¡± David said. Louis wondered if he was imagining the disappointment in David¡¯s voice. ¡°I¡¯d like to meet her. You¡¯ve told me so much about her, that I feel like I know her already.¡±


    Warmth bloomed in Louis''s chest at that and he gave a small smile.


    ¡°I¡¯ll tell her you said that,¡± Louis said. ¡°She wants to meet you, too. She says you make a wonderful vampire.¡±


    David laughed. ¡°You¡¯re the vampire this time,¡± he said.


    ¡°Apparently I¡¯m too cliche as a vampire,¡± he said, gesturing to his dark hair and pale skin. ¡°She says it ruins credibility of the myth.¡±


    ¡°But you¡¯ve got that predatory smile.¡±


    Louis gave him a sharp grin and he laughed again.


    ¡°Yeah, that one.¡±


    Louis chuckled and checked the fridge to see what they had. He decided on a vegetable stir fry saut¨¦ed in white wine. That gave the meal the special flare of romance without going overboard. He pulled out a cutting board and started chopping vegetables as David watched from the bar.


    ¡°Back to the topic at hand,¡± Louis said after they had sat in comfortable silence for a moment. ¡°I wanted to talk about why you aren¡¯t getting callbacks.¡±


    David was silent long enough that Louis looked up from chopping an onion to make sure he hadn''t left.


    ¡°And why is that?¡± David relented, tone weary.


    The defensiveness from earlier seemed to have gone and he just looked resigned, maybe even a little hurt. Louis chest ached at that, but he continued anyway.


    ¡°It¡¯s because you are the most inconsistent auditioner I¡¯ve ever met,¡± Louis said. ¡°Well, that and you have no name yet. But that¡¯ll come with time.¡±


    ¡°Thanks,¡± David said almost petulantly, "because I didn¡¯t already know that I suck at auditioning.¡±


    ¡°That¡¯s my point, though,¡± Louis said impatiently. ¡°You aren¡¯t always bad at it. And when you actually start acting, you get right into it. You are bad at auditioning, not acting. There is a difference.¡±


    ¡°That''s great and all, but the one comes before the other," David said, shaking his head. "I appreciate your... confidence in me, but I don''t know how to fix the auditioning. I''ve never been good at it and it''s not like I haven''t tried to improve."


    Louis wanted to see David succeed, and not just because David was his friend. It felt like a great injustice that the world didn''t know his name. He wanted everyone to see the David that he¡¯d had the pleasure of getting to know over the last few months and understand the beauty there.


    "How do I fix it?" David asked, something raw and vulnerable but also... hopeful in his eyes, as though he was willing to trust Louis to help, even as he expected it to hurt. Louis swallowed, throat dry under the weight of that gaze. Beautiful.


    Yes, he wanted the world to know David, but there were some parts that Louis thought he''d like to keep just for himself.


    ¡°You¡¯re already familiar with acting with me,¡± Louis said clearing his throat. ¡°What if we made a couple audition tapes with you acting across from me?¡±


    ¡°No!¡± David said, sounding almost offended. Louis raised an eyebrow. ¡°I¡¯m not going to use your name to get auditions, Louis. That¡¯s... It wouldn¡¯t be on my own merit, then.¡±


    Ah, it was about external validation, then.


    ¡°Then what if I just filmed some of them for you? I could give you pointers on what you¡¯re doing.¡±


    David considered it but shook his head. ¡°I don¡¯t think that¡¯ll help. Jennifer has tried doing that and they still sucked. I really just can¡¯t do auditions. They aren¡¯t real enough and I feel like an idiot trying to please the directors.¡±


    That was an interesting thought. Louis always found auditions to be very much the same as acting except for you weren''t in costume. But, then, David had told him on multiple occasions that his acting was based on the story. Maybe that was why he struggled with auditions when he was so brilliant as soon as it came to getting into character.


    ¡°You¡¯ve said that when you act, it¡¯s because you can see the final picture in your mind,¡± Louis thought aloud as he rolled the pan to coat it evenly in oil. ¡°And I¡¯ve seen you become the characters you play in a way that most actors can only aspire to. What stops you from doing that in your auditions?¡±


    ¡°I can see the final piece,¡± David said, grimacing. ¡°But it¡¯s not a story. It¡¯s just a tape of me sitting there talking at the directors.¡±


    "Why?"


    "Because that''s what it is!"


    ¡°But it¡¯s not,¡± Louis said. ¡°I mean, that''s what it is literally,¡± Louis continued quickly when David gave him an incredulous look. ¡°It¡¯s more than that. When you receive a piece of dialogue to read, it¡¯s part of the character as much as any of the other parts. Just like the screen test. How was that different?¡±


    ¡°Because you were there,¡± David said, his frown getting comically close to a pout.


    ¡°I was there during your first audition, too,¡± Louis pointed out. He didn¡¯t usually bring that up, but today it needed to be said.


    David¡¯s cheeks colored. ¡°That was different. I was surprised, I¡¯d never seen you in person before. Besides, you were just reading the lines.¡±


    That piqued Louis''s interest, but he couldn¡¯t afford to get sidetracked right now.


    ¡°You just said that my presence wouldn¡¯t help."


    ¡°That¡¯s not what I mean,¡± he said, scratching a hand through his hair in frustration. He was leaning so far over the counter at this point that he was practically standing on the rungs of the bar stool. It made Louis want to smile. ¡°When you were there, the characters suddenly had depth they didn¡¯t have otherwise. On my own, they were just words on paper. I didn¡¯t know them. But when you were in character, and I could see you as Don Christoph, not Louis Greene, the man who was playing Don Christoph.¡±


    Louis hummed in understanding as he saut¨¦ed the onions and peppers with some garlic.


    ¡°Then you need the characters to come to life,¡± he said. David gave him a look that said, ¡®No shit, Sherlock.¡¯


    ¡°But I can¡¯t make them come to life until I know them. And in an audition, I don¡¯t have enough information.¡±


    ¡°Then make it up,¡± Louis said, turning from the stove to meet David¡¯s eyes so that he knew he was serious.


    ¡°Make it up? But that¡¯s not actually the character. How can I be the character that the director is after if I don''t know who I''m supposed to be yet?"


    ¡°No one knows who the characters will turn into until production starts. Every actor brings something different to the table¡ªno two actors play the same character. Your interpretation is just as important as the original vision.¡±


    David shook his head but didn¡¯t argue.


    ¡°It¡¯s true,¡± Louis pushed. ¡°They just need to see what you are capable of. It might take some luck to get the first few call backs, but you have to start somewhere. And I don''t mean with commercials. It¡¯s really starting to piss me off that you seem to think that that¡¯s all you''re capable of.¡±


    David shrugged, but seemed to be thinking it over. Louis watched him from the corner of his eye. David''s head was turned down, fingers blindly fiddling with the salt shaker. He had pretty hands, long fingers and broad palms.


    ¡°I¡¯m not sure I can come up with a character, even if I wanted to.¡±


    ¡°You do that already,¡± Louis said incredulously. David gave him a confused frown. It might have made Louis laugh if it wasn¡¯t so preposterous. ¡°You do that every single time you act out a character.¡±


    ¡°No, I don¡¯t, it¡¯s written in the script,¡± David insisted.


    "David," Louis said in the tone Rosemarie used to say his name when he was being difficult.


    "What?" David huffed.


    ¡°It¡¯s not written in the script. There¡¯s a basic description, there are actions and dialogue, but the characters themselves, that¡¯s your own interpretation. What are you doing if not creating a character?


    "Your acting is what makes all of the dialogue and direction come together. They aren¡¯t real people, David, they are characters, it¡¯s you that brings them to life.¡±


    ¡°It¡¯s really not,¡± David said, but continued before Louis could interject. ¡°I¡¯m not saying that it¡¯s not worth a try, because I¡¯ll try anything at this point. I¡¯d rather die than go back to being Jennifer¡¯s runner.¡± He gave a dramatic shudder and Louis chuckled.


    ¡°Why don¡¯t we practice then?¡± Louis said, ¡°I¡¯ll give you a scenario and you tell me what the characters are like.¡±


    David didn¡¯t look convinced, but he nodded anyway.


    ¡°That man out there,¡± Louis said, gesturing out the window with his spatula. David spun his chair around to see where Louis was pointing.


    ¡°The golfer or the one on the sidewalk?¡± David asked. Louis shrugged.


    ¡°The one on the sidewalk,¡± he said. ¡°What¡¯s he doing?¡±


    ¡°Walking down the sidewalk,¡± David said, almost petulantly.


    ¡°All right,¡± Louis said, not rising to the bait. ¡°Why is he walking down the sidewalk?¡±


    ¡°How should I know?¡±


    Louis gave David a long-suffering look. ¡°Why is he walking down the sidewalk?¡±


    ¡°Fine. Uh, he¡¯s walking down the sidewalk . . . Because he lost his dog.¡±


    ¡°His dog?¡± Louis prompted.


    ¡°Yeah, Jason Oliver,¡± David said, smirking mischievously at Louis. ¡°He was a big fan of the show as a kid, and Jason is his best friend.¡±


    ¡°Why?¡± Louis prompted again. For someone who couldn¡¯t make up characters, David certainly got into it quickly.


    ¡°Because he lost his wife in a car accident three years ago. He¡¯s worried that he¡¯s going to lose Jason too. They never had kids. He and his wife, not the dog. She wanted them and he didn¡¯t. Now he regrets that, wishing that he had something left of her,¡± David said. "Not that that''s any reason to start a family¡ª"


    ¡°Does he find the dog?¡± Louis cut in before he got side tracked. He was actually curious to hear what David came up with.


    ¡°He¡¯s going to find Jason, but not before he¡¯s been hit by a car,¡± David said.


    ¡°That¡¯s grim,¡± Louis commented.


    David shrugged. ¡°He¡¯ll be fine, but he¡¯ll have to have surgery from a handsome vet,¡± David continued. ¡°One with lovely dark eyes and a kind smile.¡±


    ¡°So this is a romance?¡±


    ¡°Maybe,¡± David said. ¡°He¡¯s not sure he wants to get into anything new.¡±


    ¡°Because of his wife?¡± Louis asked softly.


    When David didn''t answer, Louis flicked off the stove and turned to face him more completely.


    David was chewing on his lip, expression serious and eyes watching Louis in a way that had made his heart start pounding. Louis swallowed and moved closer, only stopping when he bumped up against the counter. David was still leaning over the counter, putting them close enough that Louis could count David''s eyelashes as he looked down to the salt shaker.


    ¡°He¡¯s worried because he doesn¡¯t know if he feels that way," David said, voice rough. He cleared his throat. "Their friendship is too important, and if things go badly, he could never bring his dog there again.¡± David''s eyes finally moving to meet Louis''s with a hint of humor and a lot of something else.


    ¡°David¡ª¡± Louis started, and David''s eyes flicked down to his lips. Louis leaned forward a fraction of an inch and David''s met his gaze again, expression almost painfully soft.


    ¡°Lou! Are you upstairs?¡± Rosemarie yelled from downstairs.


    Louis swore and David jumped so high that he nearly fell off the stool.


    ¡°Come help me bring bags in. And are you cooking? Something smells great!¡±


    The two of them exchanged a guilty glance.


    ¡°I¡¯ll be right back,¡± Louis said, gesturing toward the stairs.


    ¡°I¡¯ll come, too,¡± David said, hopping off the stool. ¡°I can help.¡±


    Louis nodded. This was probably as good a time as any to introduce the two of them.


    ¡°Oh,¡± Rosemarie said when they reached the landing. Rosemarie¡¯s eyes flittered nervously over David before he smiled and she seemed to relax. ¡°I didn¡¯t know Louis had a guest over.¡±


    ¡°I¡¯m David,¡± he said, reaching the bottom of the stairs and taking Rosemarie¡¯s hand. ¡°You must be Rosemarie. Louis talks about you so much that I feel like we¡¯ve already met.¡±


    ¡°Does he?¡± she asked, laughing and looking fondly over at Louis. ¡°I could say the same of you, though. I can see why he¡¯s so fond of you. You¡¯re quite charming.¡±


    ¡°Awe, shucks,¡± David said, ducking his head bashfully even as he joked.


    Rosemarie giggled.


    ¡°Sorry, I would have texted, but I though you had book club tonight.¡±


    ¡°I was supposed to,¡± Rosemarie said, ¡°but Alice was sick, so we had to postpone it until next week.¡±


    ¡°What have you been up to instead?¡± he asked warily.


    ¡°Shopping with Margret,¡± she said, beckoning Louis towards the car. ¡°There are bags in the car. We went to the bookstore.¡±


    ¡°We don¡¯t have any more bookshelves.¡±


    ¡°Then we¡¯ll buy some more. There¡¯s still space in the teal bedroom.¡±


    David smiled. ¡°I spent a summer building a full-wall bookshelf with my mother once. With those high ceilings, that upstairs wall could hold a lot of books,¡± he mused.


    Louis grimaced. "Don''t put thoughts in her head," he said as he saw Rosemarie getting that gleam in her eyes that said she was trying to figure out when they could get started.


    ¡°What do your Sundays look like, David?¡± she asked.


    David grinned at her, looking truly pleased to be drafted into spending his one free day doing manual labor.


    ¡°Completely clear, actually!¡± David said, glancing at Louis as if for permission.


    ¡°I¡¯m not doing anything with paint or sawdust,¡± Louis said, crossing his arms.


    ¡°He says that, but he¡¯ll have to jump in to tell us we¡¯re doing it wrong,¡± Rosemarie said conspiratorially to David.


    David nodded sagely. ¡°I would imagine so, he likes to tell me what to do all day long, too.¡±


    ¡°He won¡¯t even let me carry my own bags upstairs,¡± she said, waving Louis towards the car again. Louis rolled his eyes but went to the trunk to take inventory.


    ¡°Tough luck,¡± David said, consolingly. ¡°But why don¡¯t you let me carry your bags up today? It¡¯s the least I can do since Louis is making dinner.¡±


    ¡°You really are a charmer. You''re supposed to be a guest,¡± Rosemarie said, though she brought him into the garage to grab some bags anyway. Louis handed him two and took the last one himself before closing the trunk.


    ¡°What are you making, Lou?¡±


    ¡°Veggie stir fry,¡± Louis said.


    Rosemarie gave him a disappointed look. ¡°Can you cook anything else?¡± she asked, sounding serious enough that Louis''s pride bristled and he frowned at her.


    ¡°Don¡¯t pout,¡± she said.


    ¡°Hey, at least I don¡¯t burn noodles,¡± Louis retorted.


    David raised an eyebrow at Rosemarie. ¡°Burn noodles?¡±


    ¡°Don¡¯t listen to him, he¡¯s full of it,¡± she said.


    ¡°Full of what, though?¡± Louis asked, tapping his chin. ¡°Wit, charm, and talent, perhaps?¡±


    ¡°Conceit for starters,¡± Rosemarie said.


    David laughed.


    The fact that the two of them hit it off so quickly had Louis''s heart loosening from a tension he didn¡¯t even realize he felt. He had thought that they would get along, but Rosemarie was shy and David could be a little much sometimes. It was... good that they were getting on. Probably.


    ¡°Well, I think it smells delicious!¡± David said.


    ¡°You¡¯ll eat fried bologna sandwiches, so I¡¯m not sure that that¡¯s a commendation,¡± Louis couldn''t help but point out.


    ¡°Are you admitting that you can''t cook?¡± Rosemarie asked.


    Louis opened his mouth to respond, but David was already cackling his way up the stairs.


    ¡°I think I like your sister more than you, Louis,¡± David called back.


    Louis just smiled fondly after him. He looked over to see that Rosemarie was watching him with a strange expression on her face. When he raised an inquiring eyebrow at her, though, she just shook her head and took his arm as they walked upstairs.


    *****


    By the end of the evening, David was almost as in love with Rosemarie as he was with Louis.


    As soon as that thought crossed his mind, though, he had to halt it in its tracks.


    Love was a very strong word. He was probably not in love with Louis. He just liked being around him, thought he was gorgeous and talented, and wanted to keep him all to himself.


    It was very much like he had felt about Jennifer all those years ago, except perhaps he was a little more interested in trying things with Louis than he had been with Jennifer. Not that that was particularly surprising. Fourteen was a little young for that kind of thing, wasn¡¯t it?


    Then again, sixteen wasn¡¯t and he¡¯d never been interested in anyone at sixteen. Was that abnormal? David hadn¡¯t given it much thought at the time, but now he wondered what that meant about him.


    On their drive back to the B&B, David kept thinking about the way their eyes met over the counter, making him fidget more than usual, fingers tapping against his thigh. He thought that Louis had been about to kiss him again. David would have let him. David would have kissed him back.


    And that would have been a mistake. Louis was not someone to experiment with.


    When Louis had parked the car, David made an almost rudely quick escape up to his room.


    He barely slept at all that night, what-if scenarios looping in his head until well past midnight.

 Chapter Ten

    ¡°You never told me whether you''re going to go to the party on Friday,¡± David said the next day, poking Louis hard in the arm.


    ¡°I told you I¡¯m expected to go,¡± Louis pointed out.


    ¡°That¡¯s not an actual answer,¡± David said.


    Louis was quiet for a moment, studying him. ¡°Do you want me to go?¡± he finally asked in an unnecessarily serious tone. It made David feel like this question was about more than just the party.


    They had been floating in the gray area between friendship and something else for quite a while now, but David still wasn''t sure he wanted to surface on one side or the other.


    ¡°I¡ª¡± David started, tilting his chair back on two legs and letting it balance there while he tried to come up with a response.


    ¡°David, can I have a word with you?¡± Nabila asked from directly behind him. David almost tipped his chair backwards in surprise. Instead, he over-corrected and the chair crashed forward, practically spilling David into Louis''s lap. Louis steadied him with a firm hand on his arm and David turned a sheepish smile at Nabila.


    ¡°You¡¯re going to break the chair,¡± Louis scolded, though he was smirking.


    ¡°Yeah, of course,¡± David said to Nabila, then stuck his tongue out at Louis before following her into her office.


    She sat down behind her desk and gestured for David to take a seat on the other side. David did so a little nervously. She rarely wanted to speak with David without Louis also present. Since starting working together, almost all of their decisions had been made in concert, and the sudden shift in that routine put David off balance.


    ¡°Don¡¯t look so nervous,¡± she said with an easy smile. ¡°It¡¯s good news.¡±


    ¡°Good news?¡± David asked, brows raising.


    ¡°The show is green lit for a second season. The pre-release reviews have been so high, that they¡¯ve given us the go-ahead to start filming.¡±


    David smiled, genuinely pleased that the show would continue, even if he was a little disappointed he wouldn''t be a part of it. ¡°Wow, that¡¯s great news. Congratulations! But what did you need me for?¡±


    ¡°That¡¯s the other good news,¡± Nabila said. ¡°Your character, and the dynamic between you and Louis on screen, has been commented on very positively. If you want the job, we¡¯d like to keep Marcus around.¡±


    David couldn¡¯t form an answer for a full thirty seconds as he processed that information. ¡°Wait, you want me to come back?¡± he finally asked.


    ¡°Yes,¡± she said. ¡°If you are up for another season, we think you''ll be an asset to the show.¡±


    ¡°Of course I want to come back,¡± David said, still a little bit in shock. The idea of working on this show¡ªwith Louis, too¡ªwas everything he¡¯d ever wanted. ¡°This has been the single greatest opportunity of my life. I¡¯ve never worked with such an amazing cast and crew.¡±


    ¡°There¡¯s no need for flattery, David, you already have the job.¡± Nabila chuckled, but looked pleased.


    ¡°I was being serious,¡± he insisted. ¡°Really, thank you for this opportunity, Nabila.¡±


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    ¡°Of course,¡± she said. ¡°But, no telling anyone about it yet, I still have to finalize things.¡±


    ¡°Yeah, all right,¡± David said, blood buzzing with excitement. ¡°Was there anything else?¡±


    ¡°No, you can go tell Louis now,¡± she said, waving him off.


    David froze at the door, turning back to her.


    ¡°You just said not to say anything. I wasn¡¯t going to¡ª¡± David started, though he was. He hadn''t even thought about it.


    ¡°You were. He already knows, anyway. It¡¯s fine.¡±


    David nodded. He supposed that it made sense that she had asked Louis if he minded, he was the star, after all.


    But the thought that she had gotten Louis''s permission still prickled at David a little bit. He didn¡¯t want to need Louis permission, or his name, or anything else to get work. He wanted to earn it with his own skill and merit.


    Louis said he was talented, and seemed to believe it, too, but David couldn¡¯t help but take note of all of the things that suggested otherwise.


    If he was so talented, then why would Nabila want to okay it with Louis before offering him the job? He was, of course, second rate to Louis¡ªless experienced, practically unknown, less of an asset overall¡ªbut David wished he could, for once, be the one who decided what he did. It was ridiculous. He was ecstatic to have this opportunity, and grateful, too, that they''d decided to change the storyline to have him back, but it still bothered him.


    David didn''t get a chance to tell Louis as he was rushed off to makeup as soon as he left the room. He was almost relieved that they weren''t filming any scenes together this morning so he could get his head on straight.


    Regardless of his attempt, something must have shown on his face when he met up with Louis at lunch. Louis''s brows drew together ominously as he turned to study David over an excessively colorful salad.


    ¡°Is something wrong?¡±


    ¡°Hmm? Oh, no, nothing,¡± David said, sliding into the bench opposite him.


    ¡°What did Nabila say this morning?¡± Louis prompted, the anticipation in his voice giving away any doubt that he already knew what Nabila had wanted.


    For one instant, David considered telling him that she had just wanted to ask him how he had liked going over the show and fill out some final paperwork before David left in two weeks, just to see what Louis would do. David had no excuse for that, though, and it would be mean.


    ¡°She asked me back next season,¡± David said. ¡°You already knew that, though.¡±


    ¡°I did,¡± he said, still watching David with something that was almost worry, ¡°and you said...?¡±


    A little of the iciness that had settled over him warmed at that expression. It was like Louis was worried that David didn''t want to come back, which implied that Louis did want him to come back.


    ¡°Yes. Of course I said yes!¡± David rolled his eyes. It was a silly question, but he was... really glad Louis had asked it.


    Louis grin was¡ªif not literally, then at least very close to it¡ªblinding as he reached across the table to give David¡¯s arm a squeeze. David¡¯s breath caught and he tried to focus on something other than the electricity that seemed to arc between them through that single point of contact.


    ¡°I¡¯m glad,¡± Louis said, tone making it sound like an admission. ¡°I wasn¡¯t looking forward to another year of this without you. I told her from the beginning that she should keep you around. I¡¯m glad she decided to change her plans.¡±


    And, just like that, any resentment David might have had toward this whole situation disappeared.


    His stomach knotted into that familiar but not unpleasant mess of emotion. Right then, he wanted to kiss Louis again, wanted to feel the scratch of his stubble against his fingertips, and inhale that unique scent that hovered just under Louis''s aftershave.


    ¡°I do want you to go to the party, by the way,¡± David said. ¡°I was hoping we might sneak off again.¡±


    Louis eyes widened just a little bit, but his smile didn''t leave, only turning into something quieter, tender.


    ¡°I¡¯ll go. I¡¯m expected to be there anyway,¡± he said.


    David nodded. ¡°Good. Now, I¡¯m going to eat before they drag me off somewhere else to get the most that they can out of me before filming ends.¡±


    ¡°They¡¯re probably going to have to shoot some extra scenes on this,¡± Louis said. ¡°Now that you aren¡¯t dying and all.¡±


    ¡°They could still use that death scene, though,¡± David pointed out. ¡°I just have to be undead before then.¡±


    ¡°You just want to be a vampire so that Rosemarie will love you better than me,¡± Louis teased.


    ¡°She did tell me that I¡¯m a better vampire,¡± he preened.


    Louis snorted. ¡°I told you. She wants you to stop by for dinner, by the way.¡±


    ¡°When?¡±


    ¡°Whenever. It was a rather non-specific invitation.¡±


    ¡°She should be careful or I¡¯ll never leave,¡± David said.


    Louis laughed at the joke, but David wasn¡¯t entirely kidding.

 Chapter Eleven

    Louis was not prone to nerves, but he was beginning to have doubts about going to the party. And about why David wanted him there.


    At the time, it seemed like David was implying something when he said that he wanted to sneak off with Louis¡ªLouis had kissed him, after all, and since then, there had been moments where Louis thought that things between them went past the line of friendship¡ªbut he still wasn''t certain. It might be that Louis was just looking too much into the situation. There was subtext, sure, but real life subtext was rarely as clear-cut as movie subtext.


    And real life expectations were a lot more biased than movie expectations, too.


    It was like trying to play a role without any clue what part he was playing. Maybe this was how David felt about auditions. The thought almost made him laugh. Maybe he should take his own advice and just act out his own interpretation with the hope that that was the role David wanted him to play.


    There was one other option, though. Jennifer Yang was David''s best friend. If nothing else, she cared deeply for David, so he doubted she''d say anything to hurt their relationship as long as she thought Louis was more of an asset than a detriment to David''s wellbeing.


    It was a risk, but a calculated one.


    Despite her being the one to tell Louis to hire David, Louis got the distinct impression that she didn''t really like him. She wasn''t openly hostile, but Louis suspected that was for David''s sake not his. Still, Louis was glad David had a friend who loved him with that kind of ferocity. She might not actually be David¡¯s sister, but she seemed pretty close to it.


    Louis didn¡¯t end up in the depths of the wardrobe and special effects department except when necessary. He mostly came down here when they needed to film a scene in vampire makeup, but those weren¡¯t nearly as frequent as one might have expected.


    ¡°Jennifer,¡± Louis greeted as he walked in.


    The department operated on the line between structured chaos and a well oiled machine. There was a flurry of creativity that seemed to have exploded all over the workspace, but everyone seemed to dance around everyone else in a perfect flow.


    Not that Louis expected anything less from Jennifer Yang. She was like the queen bee in a busy hive.


    ¡°What?¡± she asked shortly, not even bothering to look at him.


    ¡°Can we talk?¡± he asked.


    "Is it work related?"


    "No."


    ¡°I don¡¯t know what you actors do all day, but I have work,¡± Jennifer said, testily. ¡°You¡¯ll have to wait for the weekend.¡±


    ¡°The weekend is too late,¡± he said.


    ¡°Then you¡¯re shit out of luck.¡±


    ¡°It''s about David,¡± he said, undeterred.


    This seemed to finally get her attention and she turned to him. Whatever she saw in his expression, she seemed to deem it worthwhile because she muttered something to one of her worker bees before gesturing Louis into a tiny closet that must have acted like her office.


    ¡°What about David?¡± she asked, sitting down without offering him a seat. Louis took one anyway. The two of them were a little too similar to really get along, but he thought they had, at the very least, a respect for one another that would help them find common ground when it came to David.


    ¡°I want to ask a personal question,¡± Louis said, figuring that with someone like Jennifer it was probably best to just be straight forward about it.


    ¡°Then you should probably ask David,¡± she said, making to stand up again.


    Louis stayed seated. ¡°Look, he and I have been circling around the subject since we met, but I don¡¯t think he¡¯d hear the question let alone give me an answer and I don''t want to push him. This is not my first choice, either.¡±


    Jennifer''s brows were sharply unimpressed. ¡°You want to know if he¡¯s interested in you,¡± she surmised.


    Louis stiffened, lips tightening. He was trying to being direct, he reminded himself, but that seemed a little on the nose even to him.


    ¡°Not exactly,¡± Louis said slowly. He already suspected David was interested in some capacity. ¡°I want to know what kind of people he usually dates.¡±


    ¡°And David won¡¯t give you an answer?¡± Jennifer asked.


    Louis shook his head. ¡°He dodges the subject. I¡¯m not sure if he thinks I¡¯ll be offended if he tells me he¡¯s not interested or something else, but he won¡¯t give me a straight answer, and I want to know if I have a chance or if I should step back.¡±


    ¡°So you want to know if he¡¯s interested in you,¡± she repeated.


    Louis rolled his eyes. ¡°Fine, yes.¡±


    ¡°Can¡¯t answer that, next question,¡± she said.


    Louis folded his arms across his chest and leaned back in the chair, just watching her. Jennifer stared back.


    ¡°What kind of people does he usually date?¡± Louis tried again.


    ¡°No one,¡± Jennifer said.


    Louis let out an exasperated sigh. ¡°If you don¡¯t want to help me, you can just say so.¡±


    ¡°I don¡¯t really want to help you, but I¡¯m not being unhelpful,¡± Jennifer said, resting her chin on a hand and tapping her cheek with a long red nail. ¡°David doesn¡¯t date. I¡¯ve known him since he was three and the only girlfriend he¡¯s ever had dumped him after a month and that was when he was twelve.¡±


    Louis raised an eyebrow. ¡°He said you were the first girl he ever asked out.¡±


    Jennifer gave him a speculative look at that. ¡°I was. I''m pretty sure I''m the only girl he''s ever asked out, but, no, I¡¯m not the one he dated. She asked him and it only lasted a month before she realized what she was getting herself into.¡±


    Louis considered the version of David in his own mind¡ªopen and enthusiastic, always friendly¡ªand then added to it this new piece of information. He''d only ever been with one girl and that was when he was a child.


    That... changed things.


    ¡°Why only the one?¡± Louis asked.


    Jennifer shrugged. ¡°Because she asked him. He''s a people pleaser. But he didn''t enjoy it so hasn¡¯t said yes since."


    ¡°So it was a bad experience?¡± he asked, worried at how bad it must have been if that itself had put David off dating entirely. Especially if it happened when he was twelve.


    ¡°I don¡¯t think it was that,¡± Jennifer said, ¡°I just don¡¯t think it was what he wanted.¡±


    ¡°What do you mean?¡±


    ¡°I just mean that I really can¡¯t help you,¡± she said with a long exhale. ¡°David is... David. I¡¯m not even sure he knows what he wants.¡±


    Louis wouldn¡¯t be surprised. It was just about what David had told him when Louis had asked him over for dinner.


    ¡°So I¡¯m just improvising here, either way,¡± Louis mused.


    ¡°Love is never easy,¡± Jennifer said, giving him a meaningful look even as her words bordered on sarcastic. ¡°And David makes things about twice as hard as they have to be at the best of times. You had better be prepared for heartache if you decide to start anything with him. And don¡¯t you fucking dare blame it on him afterwards, got it?¡±


    Louis''s heart picked up its pace and he leaned back in his chair, considering.


    Jennifer wasn¡¯t really warning him off David, just telling him that if he was going to be with David, he was getting David and everything that that entailed.


    ¡°Thank you,¡± he said sincerely.


    Jennifer nodded and he took his leave, still pondering this new information.


    At first, Louis''s interest had just been about sex. And, if not just sex, then nothing more than a fling. Something fun and easy while he was here in Midtown. He hadn''t meant for it to be anything more than that, and he wasn''t exactly sure when that had changed.


    It was a bad idea, he knew it was a bad idea. Louis wasn''t good at relationships. He was moody and stubborn and generally difficult¡ªnot at all the kind of person someone like David needed, especially if he was still learning what he wanted. Especially if... Christ, was he a virgin? If he''d never dated, had he had sex?


    David probably deserved a lot more than Louis could give him.


    And, yet, here he was, still considering it. Still wanting it.


    Louis wanted more from David, something additional to their friendship. He felt almost guilty for it.


    Jennifer had felt the need to warn him not to hurt David if things didn''t work out, but Louis already knew that. He''d never had any expectations of David. Louis didn''t expect him to reciprocate his feelings or his interest, even in part. Louis just wanted more of David, regardless.


    He knew, too, that it was a gamble to pursue someone who was still exploring, but, despite his better judgment, Louis wasn''t deterred.


    It wasn¡¯t exactly what he had hoped to hear from Jennifer, but he could work with it. He had a better picture of David now and a better picture of what he needed.


    Louis could be very accommodating when he wanted to be. And he wanted to be for David. He wanted David and he''d accept whatever David would give him.


    *****


    When he got home that night, Louis had a lot to think about, not only regarding David but the show, too. Louis had never considered Night Mist to be anything more than a layover. It was something to bide his time doing while he was here, a purgatory of sorts.


    Kind of like David¡¯s commercials, but not quite.


    Louis''s purgatory had a time limit, though, and a worse sort of hell awaited him on the other side.


    Sometimes, when he was the worst version of himself, he wished that it would just end. He wished it would all stop so that he didn¡¯t have to keep thinking about the inevitability. But as soon as the thought crossed his mind, he was struck with a fresh wave of both guilt and grief.


    No, this suffering was the lesser by far.


    What he really wished was that Rosemarie had never gotten sick in the first place. He wished that she had found a nice husband and had a ton of kids that would call him Uncle Lou and fill this too-empty house with warmth and laughter.


    He wanted her to live.


    He just wanted her to live.


    And if she could just fucking live, so could Louis.


    When this was all over and she was gone, Louis would return to his condo in Weldstone Harbor. He would return to acting on big budget films after his hiatus and he would find comfort in a job well done.


    His life would be back on track again.


    But, when this was all over, he¡¯d be alone, too.


    The worst part of moving to Midtown was that he''d started to remember what it was like to be around other people. People he liked and people he loved.


    He wasn''t isolated in Weldstone Harbor, he wasn''t even alone, really, but this was different. Home was different. There was something stark and ordered about the home and life he''d built in Weldstone Harbor. It was exactly what he liked and exactly what he was comfortable with.


    But it wasn''t like the home that only existed with Rosemarie. There was love and comfort in every inch of Rosemarie''s home that just came with being near her. It was a kind of home that Louis had never been able to build. Louis wasn''t sure he even fit into it, really.


    David did, though. David fit there, in that kind of warmth.


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    Louis had friends before David. He had friends he considered close friends and friends he could rely on. But he had not had friends like David before David.


    He didn''t want to lose that, either.


    Part of him hoped that they could stay friends after Louis left¡ªthey had both come from Weldstone Harbor, after all¡ªbut Louis didn''t think David planned on going back.


    David had moved out of his apartment to take a shot in the dark opportunity in the middle of nowhere with no real idea what he was in for. If he was that easily displaced for a job in a town too small to be on most maps and a job as some kind of assistant, what were the odds that he would stay in Weldstone once he started getting better offers?


    What were the odds he''d stay with Louis?


    Because David would start getting better offers. Once people saw what he was capable of, he could go wherever he wanted and do whatever he wanted.


    David could be with whoever he wanted.


    The thought was a bitter one. If Louis didn''t make his intentions clear soon, he may never have a chance with David¡ªeven a chance destined to fail.


    But was it worth the risk? If things went wrong, he could lose not just a date, but the friendship they''d built, too.


    And if David was interested, what then?


    He didn''t think David would be interested in casual. And, if he was honest, he didn''t think that''s what he was after with David, either.


    But if not that, then what?


    Was Louis really looking for a boyfriend? A partner? A husband?


    Louis''s face heated. Even the idea of that kind of longevity felt ridiculous¡ªfanciful.


    The smart thing would be to let this drop. Stop flirting and just be what they were. Wasn¡¯t that enough? Yes. Of course it was. David was enough.


    But, at the same time, it really, really wasn¡¯t.


    *****


    David didn¡¯t know how exactly he had gotten into the habit of flirting with Louis, but even Jennifer was beginning to pick up on it now and that was probably not a good sign when he only saw her after work and rarely when he was actually with Louis. It either meant that Jennifer was stalking him or that he was so obvious about his infatuation that the rest of the crew were beginning to gossip.


    Today was the final day of filming and they were scheduled to film all of the scenes they needed to keep Marcus Lazarus around for another season. Where they left off, Marcus was supposed to have been killed by the succubus.


    All of that would still happen, but they needed to hint that Marcus was already a werewolf when he was maimed by the succubus. A great season finale cliff hanger, too. David was ecstatic.


    ¡°Ready?¡± Nabila asked. David sat down and inhaled, trying to focus the headspace he got into with Marcus Lazarus. He opened his eyes and Don Christoph walked through the door.


    ¡°Lazarus,¡± Don demanded in that short way he had that was still somehow cloyingly saccharine. Marcus grimaced up at him, though his heart wasn¡¯t in it. He leaned forward in his chair and gestured for Don to take a seat.


    ¡°I¡¯m not here long,¡± Don said.


    Something in his tone had Marcus standing up, too. He itched absently at the white bandage covering his left forearm. The bite from that fucking werewolf burned like mad.


    ¡°What¡¯s wrong now?¡± Marcus demanded.


    Don looked over at him, cool and calculating and superior. Marcus stepped forward and grabbed the vampire¡¯s arm, his thumb rubbing over the smooth linen of his shirt.


    "What is it?"


    ¡°I¡¯m only here to warn you and your people to stay away from the old factory tonight,¡± he said, he still looked icy but something in his gaze was almost wary.


    ¡°Like hell I¡¯m doing that,¡± Marcus insisted. ¡°You¡¯ve found her, then?¡±


    Don nodded. ¡°And you cannot join me there. Not after what happened last time.¡± Don looked pointedly at Marcus¡¯ arm, though whether it was because it still gripped his shoulder loosely or because his sleeve had ridden up to reveal the white bandages, Marcus didn¡¯t know. His hand dropped to his side anyway.


    ¡°Goodbye, Marcus,¡± Don said. Marcus grabbed at him again, but his hand was brushed off as easily as a ghost''s.


    Marcus stood in the station for only a moment, trying to decide what to do. There were lines that should and should not be crossed, really. There was his professional duty, to protect the citizens of this city, and then there was personal duty. Personal duty was to protect one¡¯s self and friends.


    When he signed up to be a cop, he decided to put the first before the second. And both were screaming at him to follow Don into the fray.


    ¡°Like, hell you¡¯re leaving without me,¡± Marcus muttered under his breath, running for the door.


    *****


    ¡°Aaaaannnnd, that¡¯s a wrap!¡± Nabila said. ¡°Thank you all for your hard work this season. We couldn¡¯t have done it without you. Quite literally. It¡¯s been a great shoot with a great cast and crew."


    There were cheers and applause and scattered congratulations. David smiled around at everyone and clapped a couple people on the shoulder.


    "We¡¯ll be meeting at Blue¡¯s at nine and you had all better be there, because the food¡¯s on me!¡± Nabila broke through over the ruckus.


    A couple whoops and laughter joined the cheers as everyone turned to each other to decompress, shaking hands and exchanging hugs. Amelia walked up to him and threw her arms around his neck, giving him a peck on the cheek.


    David laughed, hugging her back, even as his eyes shifted towards Louis to see if he''d noticed. Louis''s back was to him as he talked with the Best Boy.


    "It''s been great working with you this season," she said. "Don''t be a stranger with your time off."


    "I won''t!" David said. "I have to stay in your good graces so you''ll take care of me when filming starts again."


    "I think you''ll be pretty well taken care of, regardless," she said with a breezy laugh.


    David flushed, realizing he''d been looking at Louis again, and scratched the back of his neck. David thanked Amelia for her hard work and went to congratulate some of the other crew. He really wanted to go bother Louis, but didn''t want to look too much like a lost puppy following him around.


    After a moment, though, Louis found him. A warm hand landed on his shoulder as Louis walked up behind him. It rested there for a moment before falling away.


    David grinned. It was silly to be so pleased to have Louis''s attention. It wasn''t like he didn''t have other friends in the cast and crew to talk with, but there was something especially satisfying about being Louis''s best friend on set.


    ¡°You need a ride tonight?¡± Louis asked.


    David started to shake his head out of habit before pausing. He usually just rode with Jennifer because, well, she was his best friend.


    But he didn''t have to drive down with her. He could drive down with Louis. She¡¯d probably thank him for the lack of fingerprints on her shiny orange door handle or something. Maybe Nabila would need a ride and Jennifer would really thank him.


    ¡°Sure,¡± he said, after a moment too long. "If it''s not out of your way."


    Louis''s smile was warm as he shook his head.


    ¡°I have to drop by the house to give Rosemarie her prescriptions, but I can pick you up around 8:30. We might be a little late. Is that all right?¡±


    That sounded like it actually was out of the way for Louis, but Louis wasn''t the type to offer unless he wanted to. And David was warming to the idea of driving with him to the party.


    ¡°I could go home with you," David suggested. "After we''re done here, I mean," he added quickly at Louis''s smirk, shooting him a glare. "I can hang out with Rosemarie and then we can head straight over there after you¡¯ve fulfilled your brotherly duties.¡±


    Louis smiled softened into something pleased, though David had no idea what he''d done to deserve it. ¡°That would be perfect. Unless you wanted to change?¡±


    David glanced down at himself and laughed. He was wearing jeans and a graphic tee with a squirrel on it. It wasn''t exactly the look he would have picked, but it wasn''t like it was a black tie affair.


    "It''s not a big deal," David said, shrugging. "The behind the scenes footage is full of my fashion choices already."


    Louis snorted. "You could borrow something of mine, if you''d like."


    They were about the same size, though Louis definitely had more fashion sense than David did. David¡¯s usual attire was jeans and comfortable tee. Louis was all dark slacks and somber button fronts. He wondered if he''d look like he was trying too hard if he showed up in Louis''s clothes.


    ¡°All right,¡± David said.


    The drive back to Rosemarie¡¯s house was quiet as they chatted a bit about their plans during the off season. Louis was staying in Midtown, of course, but David wouldn¡¯t be. He was going to go back to Weldstone Harbor for at least a little while.


    There were a couple commercials he''d be filming next month and he was going to try Louis''s suggestions for improving his auditions. He had filmed a couple so far that weren¡¯t as terrible as most of them.


    But part of him worried it wasn''t enough.


    ¡°You¡¯ll do fine,¡± Louis said with absolute confidence when David had mentioned that he still hadn¡¯t heard back from anyone. ¡°You are fighting an uphill battle as a new actor. All you need is that one director to believe in you, then they¡¯ll see. Besides, Night Mist airs in October and they¡¯ll be clamoring over you after that.¡±


    ¡°I think they¡¯ll actually be clamoring over you,¡± David said, snickering. "Everyone loves a vampire. Think of all the fanfiction for that scene in episode fifteen!"


    Louis''s mouth twitched into a frown and David sobered.


    Sometimes he thought it was odd that Louis was an actor. He scorned everything involving social interactions, which might be overshadowed if he liked what he did, but sometimes he seemed to hate acting, too.


    It made David sad. A part of him would always be a fan of Louis Greene the actor. He loved Louis''s art and he had an insatiable desire for more of it. But the part of him that knew Louis the man just hoped that he could do what made him happy.


    ¡°Hopefully they¡¯ll calm down when they realize that I¡¯m not doing any big productions,¡± he muttered.


    He sounded bitter about that, too. Like he would be dissatisfied no matter what. David knew he didn¡¯t like Night Mist in the same way David liked Night Mist but now he wondered if Louis legitimately was unhappy here. Would he prefer to be somewhere else, doing bigger and better things? He was here for Rosemarie, after all.


    David hadn''t really considered what Louis would be doing... after.


    So far, David had managed to keep the knowledge that Rosemarie wasn''t getting better locked away somewhere deep in his brain. He didn''t want to think about it. But he hadn''t really thought about the fact that it meant Louis''s time in Midtown was also limited.


    Was it really any wonder that Louis wasn''t happy? David swallowed a wave of guilt. He was selfish and a terrible friend, but he was glad Louis was here. His nightmare was one of the best things that ever happened to David. It was awful.


    David had gotten to know Rosemarie a little better since he''d come over for the first time and he had found that she was a very easy woman to love. The world felt like it would be fundamentally changed by the absence of the simple light she gave off.


    ¡°What are you two going to do while I grab the prescriptions?¡± Louis asked when they arrived.


    She''d given David her number the first night and they''d been chatting nonstop since then, so he''d texted her on the way over and they''d already formulated a plan.


    David grinned, swinging his arm around Rosemarie¡¯s shoulders. Rosemarie giggled.


    ¡°We¡¯re going to design The Bookshelf!¡±


    ¡°Of course you are,¡± Louis said, giving them both his best exasperated look. Which wasn¡¯t very good because of the underlying fondness of it. "A general reminder that I am not a carpenter and have nothing to do with this project."


    "We wouldn''t endanger your wardrobe," David said solemnly.


    ¡°All right, then, off you go,¡± Rosemarie shooed her brother away and took David¡¯s proffered arm as they made their way back upstairs. She looked tired today, but seemed in high spirits.


    ¡°What walls are we covering?¡± David asked with a conspiratorial wink. There were so many walls to choose from. Big walls. He could just picture all of the books they could fit in here.


    ¡°All of them,¡± she said. David laughed, but he''d seen her novel collection, so he simply asked where to find a measuring tape and they got started.


    *****


    Their sketches and measurements completed, they sat down on the couch with a cup of hot cocoa that David made¡ªhis one best destiny was to be a barista, according to Jennifer. Rosemarie had grown quiet, though David had tried to do most of the measuring and climbing around himself.


    ¡°David,¡± she said, staring off into the distance with a slight frown, ¡°you and Louis have gotten close over the last few months.¡±


    ¡°Yeah, that''s true,¡± David said, trying not to think about exactly how close they had gotten.


    ¡°What¡ª¡± she broke off, considering for a moment. ¡°What are your intentions toward Louis?¡±


    David almost sprayed hot cocoa out of his nose. As it was, he did inhale a little of it. That was not the question he''d expected, especially because Louis had warned him that his love life was not something she discussed with him¡ªDavid got the impression that that bothered Louis, and he wondered if Rosemarie had a problem with Louis being gay.


    ¡°Sorry,¡± Rosemarie said, pounding him on the back. "I know it''s an inappropriate question, but¡ª"


    David shook his head, coughing until he could get an actual breath.


    ¡°No, no,¡± he said when he could breathe again, ¡°the question just startled me, that¡¯s all.¡±


    Rosemarie looked out the window.


    ¡°I just want to know what Louis is to you? Is he a work colleague, a friend? Or something else?¡±


    David stared at her for a long moment, trying to come up with an answer for her. The problem was that David didn''t fully understand his own intentions towards Louis.


    His feelings towards Louis probably weren''t entirely platonic, but he wasn''t sure where they were collectively, either. Louis flirted and David¡ªwell, David wasn''t sure if he flirted with Louis, but he didn''t not flirt with him, and he definitely didn''t want Louis to stop flirting with him.


    But he didn''t have a real answer, either. They floated in the space between friendship and romance. David couldn¡¯t tell how serious he was about it, let alone how serious Louis was about it. And he didn''t want to betray Louis''s confidence by telling Rosemarie something he didn''t want her to know.


    ¡°Louis is one of my closest friends,¡± David said. It wasn''t enough, but it was true.


    Rosemarie¡¯s lips tightened just a little and David sighed.


    ¡°I don¡¯t know what you hope to hear. Maybe saying we¡¯re friends isn¡¯t much¡ªI have a lot of friends¡ªbut Louis is more than just a colleague or a friend from work. He''s more like Jennifer¡ªand I''ve known her since I was three."


    ¡°Louis is one of your best friends?¡± Rosemarie confirmed.


    ¡°Yeah, I guess you could put it like that,¡± David said.


    Saying that he was like Jennifer wasn''t a lie, but it wasn''t the whole truth, either. He loved Jennifer like a sister.


    He did not love Louis like a brother.


    David wanted to have Louis and to keep him. He wanted to possess Louis in a way that he couldn''t express without sounding completely insane. You couldn¡¯t possess other people, after all. Louis was his own person, but that didn¡¯t stop David from wanting him to be David''s¡ªand only David''s.


    But that wasn''t something he could say to Louis''s sister, even if he was sure about what it all meant.


    ¡°I¡¯m not going to be here much longer," Rosemarie started, voice soft. David''s eyes stung. "The doctors gave me a year at most and that was going on eleven months ago. I don''t know how much Louis has told you, but we''ve reached the point of diminishing returns. I''ve stopped treatments."


    Rosemarie looked at him with soft brown eyes, so much like her brother''s, and gave him a sad smile. David wanted to say something, to protest or tell her that it wasn''t fair, but he couldn''t find his voice.


    "It''s not fair of me to spring this on you, but I think dying would be easier if I knew Louis would be taken care of after I''m gone. So I need that favor from you. I need you to look after him. Look after Louis."


    David''s voice was strained when he finally forced it past the constriction in his throat. ¡°Well, maybe you should stop thinking that I¡¯m here to take care of him! Just keep living and look after him yourself.¡± His vision was more than a little blurry.


    Rosemarie chuckled, then reached out to squeeze his arm. ¡°You¡¯re a sweet boy. I¡¯m not giving up, but I am dying. And when I do, I hope that you''ll be there for him.¡±


    ¡°Why me?¡± David asked. He didn''t begrudge the request and he''d do it¡ªof course he''d do it, she didn''t even need to ask¡ªbut he needed to know why she was asking him of all people.


    ¡°Because he loves you," she said, making David''s heart jump to his throat, "and you care about him, too. You can pull him out of himself. Sometimes people think that he doesn¡¯t feel anything.¡±


    David scoffed and Rosemarie gave him a fond smile.


    ¡°He¡¯s so reserved," she explained, "that I don¡¯t think they expect the depth of his emotions. But I think you see him how I see him.¡±


    ¡°Like a non-robot person?¡± David asked.


    Rosemarie chuckled but nodded. ¡°Yes. He¡¯s not a character, even though I sometimes think that he believes he is. He does need people, despite his best efforts.¡±


    ¡°He''s mentioned friends in Weldstone Harbor,¡± David observed.


    Rosemarie let out a slow breath. ¡°Yes, I think he has a few. But I never met many of Lou''s friends, even before I moved away. He''s tough to get close to.¡±


    David didn''t really think that was true. He and Louis had gotten pretty close almost immediately. Maybe it was the forced proximity.


    "I don''t think he''s ever had a really close friend."


    ¡°Really?¡± David asked, surprised.


    Rosemarie shook her head. "It was probably the way he was raised," she said, a little self-deprecating. "Lou doesn''t share himself with other people¡ªthat''s how I can tell that you''re different. Lou is himself when you''re here. I don''t want him to lose that part of himself when I''m gone."


    Suddenly, David understood what it was she was asking. She wanted to make sure that Louis stayed Louis.


    David didn¡¯t tell her that he thought that Louis was self-sufficient enough, rational enough, to stay himself even when she was gone. He couldn¡¯t imagine Louis being anyone but himself. Even when he played the character of Louis Greene, David didn''t think Rosemarie''s Lou would ever be lost.


    ¡°I¡¯ll be there,¡± David said, reaching over to take one of her hands in his and giving it a squeeze.


    ¡°Thank you, David.¡± Her lips turned up in a smile. Her eyes stayed sad, though.

 Chapter Twelve

    Rosemarie and David were lounging on the couch when he entered the living room. David had his arm wrapped around Rosemarie¡¯s shoulder, her head nestled against him in a way that made Louis feel rather envious of both of them for completely different reasons.


    ¡°Are you trying to replace me, David?¡± Louis asked.


    ¡°We''ve already established that I''m her favorite vampire,¡± David said. "Besides, I''m not afraid of paint and wood shavings." He stuck his tongue out at Louis and Louis caught his eye, wondering if David could guess how much he wanted to chase the pink tip back into his mouth. He smirked as David''s face flushed a little.


    Rosemarie chuckled, reaching a hand out to Louis, though she didn¡¯t move away from David. She looked too tired. Louis stepped over and took her hand, giving it a squeeze.


    ¡°You boys off?¡± she asked.


    ¡°Yeah, I¡¯ll help you to bed first," he said. "David, you know where my room is, you can find something to wear in there.¡±


    ¡°Thanks,¡± David said before carefully untangling himself from Rosemarie. "I''ll text you tomorrow," he said to Rosemarie, giving her a hug before handing her off to Louis and disappearing down the stairs.


    ¡°He¡¯s a good boy,¡± she said as he walked with her into her room.


    ¡°You talk about him like an old granny,¡± Louis warned.


    ¡°You¡¯re a good boy, too,¡± Rosemarie said, giving his arm a squeeze. Louis chuckled and kissed the top of her head.


    She sat on the bed as Louis pulled a pair of soft sage pajamas from her dresser, inhaling the delicate scent of amber and roses that suffused everything she owned. He set them beside her on the bed and leaned down to hug her once more.


    ¡°All right, do you need anything before I leave?¡± he asked. She shook her head. Louis looked around doing a mental check. She already had a glass of water beside her bed and she''d plugged in her phone while Louis got her pajamas. He deemed that she would be fine until he got back.


    ¡°Go on, Louis," she urged, "you¡¯re going to be late for your gathering. And you''ve already left David waiting."


    Louis opened his mouth to say something about skipping it entirely, but David really was waiting downstairs so he just nodded.


    "Your medications are in the cupboard," he said. "I can sort them tomorrow."


    "Lou," she said, "go on. I''ll be okay for a couple hours. Besides, I''ll just be asleep anyway. You may as well go have fun with your friends."


    Louis rolled his eyes but nodded and went to find David.


    He rapped his knuckles on the door as he entered. David didn''t look up and Louis took the opportunity to study him. He was in the process of rifling through his shirts, giving them odd looks. His hair was in its usual state of natural disarray that it adopted after a day''s work. He was lean, but his shoulders were broad and his chest well defined beneath his light graphic tee.


    "Finding anything?" Louis asked, amused.


    David glanced over, wrinkling his nose and Louis quirked a brow at him. Louis didn¡¯t think any of his clothes were that peculiar. They were mostly neutral toned button fronts, hardly objectionable.


    ¡°Do you own any colors other than black and white? Or is anything that¡¯s not monochromatic impractical?¡±


    ¡°Black and white never go out of style. And, no, nothing that would look good on you,¡± Louis said. He ran his hands over the different button fronts until he found one that was plain white but in silk with a nice sheen. He pulled it off the hanger and held it out.


    David frowned at it, but stripped out of his tee-shirt anyway.


    Louis took a moment to appreciate the ridges of his abs and the peaks of his nipples before forcing his eyes back up to David¡¯s face. David¡¯s chest was entirely hairless. Louis wondered if it was genetic or if he waxed to get that smooth. Louis wanted very much to run his hands over David¡¯s chest to find out.


    Before he realized that he was staring at David¡¯s chest again, the shirt disappeared from his hand and began buttoning up over that expanse of tanned skin.


    "Leave the top two undone," Louis said and David''s hands stilled. Louis nodded in approval.


    ¡°I guess it''s not too bad,¡± David said doubtfully. He turned this way and that in the mirror. The silk clung to his slim waist and the vee created by the open buttons drew the eyes to his cleft of his chest.


    ¡°Are you implying that you¡¯ve never worn a white button front before?¡± Louis asked with a quirked brow. David shrugged.


    ¡°Nope. Not unless it was under a monkey suit,¡± he said, grinning.


    Louis pulled a pair of slacks off a hanger, too, considering before shaking his head.


    "Just wear your jeans," he said. They did something great for his ass and David just looked right in jeans, casual and charming.


    "Do I tuck it in?" he asked, making a face.


    Louis chuckled and shook his head. "No, but go brush your hair," he said, directing him towards the bathroom. "You look look deranged."


    David laughed but went into the bathroom. Louis pulled out a new shirt for himself, still black but with a subtle embroidered pattern over the collar and pocket.


    "Do you have deodorant somewhere?" David asked, poking his head back out the door. Louis dropped his other shirt into the laundry hamper and looked over.


    "In the top right drawer," he said.


    "Ah," David said, eyes a little wide as he looked at Louis.


    Louis raised an eyebrow, though he couldn''t help but turn a little further towards David to give him a better angle. David''s cheeks flushed a little and his eyes were slow to return to Louis''s.


    "Did you need something else?" he prompted.


    David shook his head, then disappeared back into the bathroom. "I''m borrowing some, then," he called as he opened and closed at least three drawers.


    Louis chuckled and pulled on his shirt before David appeared again, looking much more put-together than he had a moment before.


    ¡°Right. Now that that¡¯s taken care of, let¡¯s go,¡± Louis said, glancing at the clock.


    They were probably going to be a little late despite David having come home with him. Possibly because he had.


    The entire drive there, Louis couldn¡¯t help but steal glances at David. His blond hair was mussed in an intentional way that made it look sensually disheveled instead of messy. He smelled like Louis deodorant and the particular scent that was just David and it was making Louis a little crazy.


    Louis would have really liked to forget about the party and stop the car on the side of the road just so he could kiss him. Maybe pull him onto his lap so he was straddling Louis and really make out with him. He could imagine the ridges of him pressed tight against Louis so that he didn''t set off the horn. He pushed away the thought before he could get carried away.


    Tempting as it was, this was David and that probably wasn''t what he was after.


    But he had said that they could escape together again.


    What Louis hoped he meant by that wasn''t necessarily what David meant, though.


    This was going to be a hell of a night.


    *****


    Jennifer and Nabila were talking by the door to the bar when they arrived.


    ¡°Finally decided to show up?¡± Jennifer demanded, giving David a really disappointed look. She did a once-over of him then glanced at Louis with a quirked brow. Apparently, Jennifer knew that David didn¡¯t own a white button front.


    ¡°You two look great,¡± Nabila said, despite the fact that Louis was still wearing the shirt he had arrived at work in that morning. ¡°Now get in here before all the food in the restaurant is gone.¡±


    ¡°You mean you started the party without me?¡± David gasped in mock affront. Jennifer cuffed him upside the head before taking his arm and dragging him through the door. Louis held the door for Nabila before bracing himself and following her into the crowd.


    David was already talking to a group of people, including half the lighting crew and a number of the police station cast. His smile was infectious and his laughter cut through the din of the party.


    Louis hovered near the edge of the group, speaking with whoever approached him without particularly encouraging them to stay. It had been all of fifteen minutes before Louis started itching to leave again. David seemed to be having a good time, though, so he backed out of the group and went to find a booth to watch. It wasn''t his ideal way to spend an evening, but the view could be worse.


    David seemed completely at east with this sort of crowd. Being around an audience seemed to amp up his enthusiasm instead of diffusing it. If Louis was a romantic, he''d have said that David was like the sun. There was a particular energy that radiated from him that Louis wanted to bask in. He was almost envious of the people crowded around him joining in his laughter.


    He was so caught up in David that he didn''t even notice Jennifer sliding into the booth next to him until she spoke. ¡°You look awkward as fuck sitting here alone."


    Louis blinked at her, then rose an eyebrow. ¡°I¡¯m not a people person.¡± An understatement.


    Jennifer hummed. ¡°Sure, but you could at least stop looking like you¡¯re plotting murder. It''s a party; lighten up.¡±


    ¡°I don¡¯t look like I¡¯m¡ª¡±


    ¡°It¡¯s the eyebrows,¡± Jennifer explained.


    Louis''s hand reached up to smooth over one of his brows before he could stop himself. He glared at her. ¡°What do you want?¡± he asked.


    ¡°To make your brooding look intentional,¡± she said. ¡°Things not going as planned with David?¡± She looked amused by that.


    Louis took a sip of his drink, eyes wandering back over to David.


    ¡°Why do you ask?¡± he said.


    ¡°Because you look like you¡¯re going to burn a hole through that nice white shirt that he must have borrowed,¡± she said. ¡°And you¡¯re way over here instead of over there with him.¡±


    ¡°I haven¡¯t even approached him,¡± Louis said pointedly.


    ¡°Yes, I can tell." Louis almost thought she looked disapproving.


    ¡°I thought you warned me not to.¡±


    Jennifer shrugged, taking a sip of something that might have been either vodka or water. She must have noticed his glance because she said, ¡°Nabila is the DD tonight.¡±


    ¡°And you want me to pursue David?¡± Louis asked.


    ¡°Not really,¡± Jennifer said. ¡°I do, however, want him to be happy. And sometimes learning to be happy comes with some heartbreak.¡±


    ¡°Wise words,¡± Louis said dryly.


    ¡°Not wise, just experienced.¡± Jennifer glanced over at David with something between fondness and pity. ¡°I love him, but he¡¯s never really had to grow up.¡±


    ¡°What do you mean?¡±


    ¡°He¡¯s been the baby all his life, he¡¯s never faced the sort of adversity that forces you to overcome your weaknesses and grow stronger because of them. He¡¯s a greenhouse baby. A penthouse baby.¡±


    ¡°So you want me to be adversity in David''s life?¡± Louis asked, unsure whether he should be honored or offended that she wanted Louis to make David grow up.


    ¡°Some day, someone will be David¡¯s adversity,¡± Jennifer said, meeting his eyes. ¡°It might as well be someone who genuinely cares about him."


    Louis looked over at David again and something uncomfortable settled in his stomach. "And what if I don''t want to be his adversity?" It was a little too close to telling Jennifer that he was serious about David¡ªa little too close to admitting it to himself, even¡ªbut he was certain that adversity was not how he wanted to characterize his relationship to David.


    "I guess that''s up to you," Jennifer said. "Just remember that I warned you."


    Louis didn''t have a chance to respond as the subject of their conversation started over toward them, the peculiarity of Louis and Jennifer sitting together engaged in conversation seemingly too tempting a lure.


    He sat down on the bench with enough gusto that it made Louis bounce on the vinyl seat. His drink sloshed in the glass and he gave David a chastising look. David just grinned. The party didn''t seem as bad with David sitting beside him, so close that their shoulders were nearly touching. He was inordinately pleased that David had chosen to sit on his side of the bench instead of Jennifer''s.


    ¡°What are you two up to?¡± David asked.


    ¡°Just chatting about Louis''s intentions toward you,¡± Jennifer said. Louis glared at her, but David just chuckled. ¡°I¡¯m giving him the shovel talk. Shotgun, truck, dog. You know, the country music trio.¡±


    ¡°I think it¡¯s a little late for that,¡± David said, ¡°you probably should have said so sooner.¡±


    ¡°Oh?¡± Jennifer said, eyes cutting from David to Louis.


    David laughed and waved a dismissive hand.


    ¡°You have given him the lecture before he had a chance to realize you''re really a big softie. Little softie, rather.¡±


    Louis didn¡¯t think he would have called Jennifer a softie¡ªparticularly to her face¡ªbut she definitely harbored an amazing amount of affection for David.


    Jennifer glared at her friend, flicking his wrist before excusing herself back to the crowd.


    ¡°What are you drinking?¡± David asked, looking over.


    ¡°Shirley Temple,¡± Louis said, offering the glass to David.


    David took it and took a sip of it, making a face at the syrupy sweetness before handing it back.


    Louis chuckled, though he was a little self-conscious of the childish indulgence. What would people say if they saw Louis Greene drinking a Shirley Temple? He should probably have just had a water.


    ¡°You know, I can abstain tonight if you want to drink,¡± David said.


    Louis shook his head. ¡°I don¡¯t drink."


    David cocked his head. He was very close. Heat prickled across Louis''s skin. He could smell David''s skin, the scent of him growing stronger in the heat of the room, and Louis had the urge to lean in and bury his nose in his hair which was looking more mussed again. Louis wondered how many times he''d run his hands through it tonight. He could feel him, too, burning against Louis''s left side.


    ¡°Why not?¡± David asked.


    ¡°I just don¡¯t. Is that a problem?¡± Louis asked. He didn''t realize how sharp his tone sounded until David''s smile fell and he raised his hands as though in surrender. He cursed himself internally for letting the crowd get to him and taking it out on David.


    ¡°No, of course not," David said, "Sorry, I was just curious. I wasn''t trying to, I don''t know, pressure you or anything. So¡ª¡±


    Louis didn¡¯t get to hear what David was about to say because one of the foley artists called him making David jump.


    "Go on," Louis said, "enjoy yourself."


    David hesitated for a minute looking a little confused, but Louis just raised his brow. There was absolutely no reason David should feel obligated to spend his time solely with Louis. He had other friends and this was a celebration, after all. After a moment, David gave little nod and excused himself with an apologetic smile. Louis didn''t miss the worried look David threw him over his shoulder.


    Royal Road is the home of this novel. Visit there to read the original and support the author.


    Louis was a lousy friend.


    It wasn¡¯t often that David asked him for anything and coming to a social outing¡ªone he would have had to attend anyway¡ªreally shouldn''t have put him so on edge. But part of his mind kept going back to Jennifer''s warning, even as the rest of him kept wondering what David''s neck tasted like and whether he''d let Louis kiss him again. Louis shook his head and let out a long breath.


    He didn''t want to be here, but that wasn''t David''s fault. It wasn''t even David''s fault if he wasn''t interested in Louis the same way Louis was interested in him. David was just hard not to fall in love with.


    But didn''t that give Louis all the more reason to meet him half way? Wasn''t that the least David deserved?


    Sighing, Louis stood from his secluded table and moved toward the crowd. He found David easily enough, following the sound of his laughter. He was chatting again, but he looked a little tense, like he''d been scolded. Louis''s stomach clenched. He really was a shitty friend.


    He walked up behind David and clapped a hand on his shoulder. David turned to him to see who it was and Louis was rewarded with a bright smile as David stepped over to include him in the circle of people he was talking to.


    Louis''s face relaxed automatically into the public figure facade he coined when he was ten and trying to figure out how to interact with other human beings in a more mature way than crying on set.


    ¡°Louis,¡± David greeted, even though they had just seen each other moments before. Louis smiled and greeted the foley artist and the small group of cast and crew who had gathered around David.


    ¡°Excited to be done with filming?¡± Amelia asked him.


    Louis turned to her with a genial smile. ¡°It¡¯ll be nice to have some more free time,¡± he said.


    ¡°You working on anything else in the interim?¡±


    ¡°No, I¡¯m taking a break from film to spend some time with family,¡± he said.


    ¡°Ah, I guess big stars don¡¯t need constant upkeep,¡± she said with a laugh.


    Louis stiffened. He knew she didn¡¯t mean it like that, but the implication that he was slacking off rankled.


    She didn¡¯t seem to notice.


    "I''m not sure I''d describe Louis''s acting as low upkeep," David cut in. "His filmography takes multiple pages to list." His tone was light, but Louis was touched at the defensiveness in the words.


    Amelia flushed. ¡°Oh, of course. I didn¡¯t mean it like that,¡± she said, turning a worried face to Louis. ¡°I worked with you on Bottlecap, you''ve always taken your work seriously. I admire it. I didn¡¯t mean to imply that you didn¡¯t.¡±


    Louis turned an easier smile on her. ¡°I know you didn¡¯t.¡±


    He waved a hand to dismiss the issue even as he felt a little smug that David had defended him against even a perceived slight.


    To Louis''s surprise, after a while, he actually began to enjoy himself. He was pulled into half of David¡¯s stories about the set. Their audience all seemed amused despite half of them having been there, but David understood how to captivate an audience with a story. He brought them to life in a way that was sometimes more real than what actually happened. Louis only had to step in a couple times to interject when David started getting really off track with the recounting.


    It was a quarter to midnight before David, looking a little buzzed, wrapped an arm around his shoulders. Louis didn''t dare look over at him. David''s breath ghosted across his cheek as he leaned in to mutter in his ear.


    "Should we run away?" he asked.


    Louis laughed, agreeing easily and made their excuses to the rest of the increasingly drunk crowd. David didn''t remove his arm until they stepped outside again. Louis felt a chill go through him as David''s arm dropped from his shoulders.


    ¡°Where are we going?¡± David asked once he was buckled into the car.


    Louis glanced over at him. It was late and David had been drinking. He should probably take David home.


    "Not ready to go home yet?"


    David pouted. "No, you need to take me sight seeing again before I go back to Weldstone Harbor."


    Louis chuckled, shaking his head. "All right, where do you want to go?"


    David considered for a moment before shrugging, looking bashfully over at Louis. "I don''t know."


    "The park?" he asked.


    David giggled. Louis didn''t usually like dealing with drunk people, but David was almost cute. He couldn''t help but smile back. "The one we got busted at last time?" David asked.


    ¡°Maybe we¡¯ll run into a fan of Lust Story this time,¡± Louis teased.


    David cackled a little longer than was really warranted but he nodded. "If we get caught, just pretend to be a vampire. We''ll say we''re practicing lines."


    David leaned his head against the window in a way that beautifully displayed the curve of his neck. Louis''s brain helpfully supplied a variety of scenarios in which he could pretend to be a vampire, at least half of which involved his mouth on the corded line of David''s neck.


    Ripping his attention away from those thoughts was a herculean effort. He was going to have to play this out carefully because Louis wasn''t sure he''d survive the fallout if he didn''t.


    *****


    David inhaled the fresh air and watched his breath ghost softly. It was already May, but the mountain air was still cold enough to chill the skin. David wished he brought a jacket that morning, but it was almost worth it to see how the wind turned Louis''s ears a really sweet shade of pink.


    David wanted to bite them. David sucked in a sharp breath and shivered. Maybe he was more drunk than he thought.


    "Cold?" Louis asked.


    David shrugged, but before he could deny it, Louis had opened his trunk and pulled something black out of it.


    ¡°Heads up,¡± he said before tossing it to David who skillfully caught it. With his face.


    ¡°What are you, a boy scout?¡± David laughed, wrapping the fleece blanket around himself like a cape.


    Louis raised an eyebrow, but didn¡¯t comment.


    ¡°It¡¯s nice out here,¡± David said, talking about so much more than the scenery from this particular park. ¡°Why don''t you like it here? It seems like the perfect place. You like being alone."


    Something crossed over Louis''s expression at that, but David''s mind wasn''t clear enough to decipher it.


    "I like solitude," Louis said after a moment, "but I like convenience more."


    "Or you just like watching people too much," David teased.


    Louis''s face flushed a little but David was too high on the excitement from the end of filming and the buzz of alcohol to analyze it too much. Instead, he walked over to the fence that separated the park from the little river and leaned over it, looking down into the water.


    "How drunk are you?" Louis asked, taking two steps over to grab David''s hips, just above the waistband of David''s jeans, as though to pull him back. "You aren''t going to fall in and drown, are you?"


    David laughed. Everything was good right now. "Not drunk enough to need a babysitter. Or to go swimming in jeans," he said, though he liked the way Louis''s hands felt warm against his waist.


    Louis gave a skeptical hum and David leaned back enough to bump him playfully with a shoulder. ¡°I¡¯m not drunk,¡± he insisted. ¡°Just buzzed.¡±


    "Good," Louis said, though he didn''t elaborate.


    David turned around until they were face to face, brows furrowed. He studied Louis''s expression for a minute, the warmth of the alcohol seeming to leave him.


    "No need to be judgmental," David said. "I rarely overindulge."


    "I''m not," Louis said, voice going quiet, though there was definitely something lingering in his expression.


    "Then what''s wrong?"


    "Nothing," Louis said. "I''m not... you haven''t done anything wrong. I''m not judging you. I''m just... weird about alcohol."


    That certainly still sounded like Louis was judging him. David frowned, pulling out of Louis''s grip and leaning against the fence again. Louis gave a frustrated sigh and looked away for a long moment before meeting his eyes again.


    "It''s not you. I''m not judging you," Louis said. "It''s just..." He hesitated and it took David a moment to place his expression.


    David was floored when he realized that Louis was ashamed of whatever he was hesitating to voice. David didn''t think he''d ever seen that expression before. He didn''t imagine Louis felt shame, if he was perfectly honest.


    "You are," David said, shrugging, "But it''s fine."


    "I''m not," Louis insisted. He sounded almost angry about it. David wasn''t sure how to deal with whatever this was. "I just have a family history."


    David''s stomach clenched. "Oh."


    There was silence for a long moment and David wasn''t sure how to make this uneasiness better. Louis moved to the side and David had the urge to grab him just to stop him from moving away. He didn''t go far, though, merely leaning back against the fence beside David.


    "I lost my father to a bad combination of drugs and alcohol. Rosemarie found him."


    David''s eyes went wide. He knew Rosemarie had raised Louis, but he hadn''t known this part of the story. He had never looked into who Louis''s family was or what their story was. Before they met, because he hadn''t cared and after because it felt like an invasion of Louis''s privacy.


    "Louis¡ª"


    "For my mother," Louis continued, holding up a hand to stop David, "it was a long string of DUIs culminating in someone dying. She''s in prison now."


    "I''m sorry," David said, watching Louis''s profile. "That''s why you don''t drink?"


    "That''s why I don''t drink," Louis confirmed. It sounded almost like an apology. His expression was something vulnerable, too, when he finally looked over at David.


    David wasn''t sure what possessed him, but he reached out to press a hand to the back of Louis''s head, patting his hair a little. Louis looked shocked for a moment, but didn''t brush him off, his lips even curling into a slight smile.


    "I''m not judging you, David," he said after a moment. "I know you. I trust your judgment. But, no, I''m not comfortable with alcohol. I don''t know that I ever will be."


    David nodded. "Okay. Thank you for telling me." He tilted his head, watching where his fingers disappeared in Louis''s hair. He should stop, but he didn''t want to and Louis hadn''t stopped him. So he kept petting him. Louis had really nice hair¡ªthick and surprisingly soft. Another thought occurred to him. "Would you prefer that I didn''t drink around you?"


    Louis''s smile was gentle when he spoke. "No, it''s fine. I mean it, David, I trust you."


    David thought they''d have to revisit this discussion when he was not, in fact, under the influence of alcohol, but for now he just nodded. He wasn¡¯t surprised when a warm shoulder bumped into his side. He was, however, surprised when the shoulder stayed pressed against him, a stark contrast to the autumn air. With his hand still resting at the back of Louis''s neck, it was nearly an embrace.


    Louis looked over at him and David''s heart jumped into his throat. He dropped his hand from Louis''s hair, letting it rest on the railing as he looked over to the swings.


    "So, I''ll have to come visit, you know," David said, very smoothly changing the topic to cover his awkwardness. "During the break. Rosemarie and I have plans."


    Louis snorted then outright laughed until David elbowed him.


    "Stop laughing at me," he groused.


    ¡°You aren¡¯t really going to build that bookshelf, are you?¡± Louis asked, placatingly taking the change of subject, even if his expression was almost one of disgust.


    ¡°I am definitely going to build the bookshelf," David said determinedly. "Rosemarie and I have already sketched it out and taken the measurements. She said she''d take you paint chip shopping next week.¡±


    Louis groaned with exaggerated despair. ¡°You shouldn¡¯t encourage her. She already has more books than any sane person should own, and most of them have half naked men on the covers.¡±


    ¡°Why are you complaining, then?¡± David asked before his filter could catch the comment. Drunk David seemed to be pretty keen on flirting with Louis.


    Louis just sighed, giving David a put upon look. ¡°Vampires are not my thing.¡±


    David caught his eye and suddenly couldn¡¯t tear himself out of those dark depths. His arm was still pressed nearly all the way across Louis''s back and Louis was so warm against his side in that thin black shirt with the little dragons embroidered across the collar.


    ¡°How do you feel about werewolves?¡± he asked, eyes drifting down to Louis''s lips. They were so close that their breaths mingled in the air when they spoke.


    "Complicated," Louis said with a breathy quality in his voice that made David want to press himself up against him.


    "Louis¡ª" David said, eyes having trouble choosing between staring at Louis''s lips or his eyes.


    Louis leaned forward ever so slightly and David''s breath left him all at once.


    He didn''t know who finally moved in the rest of the way, but he was pretty sure it was him. Whether it was the alcohol making him reckless, or the fact that he was dressed in Louis''s silk shirt and wrapped in Louis''s fleece blanket, or just the smell of Louis now that his aftershave had worn off, David didn''t know, but the first press of their lips drew a groan from him.


    David turned further towards Louis, wanting to be closer, even though he couldn''t figure out what to do with his hands. Or his lips. Or any of him, really. Louis didn''t seem to mind. His cool hands came up to cup David''s nape. They were nearly of a height, but this close, David was all too aware of that spare inch Louis had on him, requiring him to tilt his head just so to maintain the connection.


    Louis''s tongue dipped into his mouth and David shivered, he could taste the cherry and ginger from his drink and hear the little gasps of his own breath as Louis caught his lip between his teeth. He''d never thought kissing could be like this. He wanted more.


    David''s hands found their way to Louis''s waist, fingers rubbing up and down against the fine threads of his shirt until his finger tips began to go numb from the stimulation. He shuffled closer until there was barely an inch of him that wasn''t plastered against Louis.


    One of his thumbs rasped against David''s cheek, his fingers hooking behind David''s neck. He had the other arm wrapped around David, his hand flat on his back, pressing their chests together until he could feel each of Louis''s inhales and exhales.


    ¡°This is what kissing should feel like,¡± David murmured breathlessly against Louis''s lips.


    Louis pulled back slightly. David''s hands tightened around his waist, but Louis didn''t pull back far, staying close enough that their noses rubbed when he moved. David laughed at the close up view of Louis''s quirked brow.


    ¡°You¡¯re a good kisser,¡± he explained, feeling a little bashful.


    ¡°Good,¡± Louis said, pressing another kiss to David''s lips.


    This kiss was chaste, though, and tender enough that it made David¡¯s eyes flutter closed so he could better concentrate on the feeling.


    ¡°Is this what you want?¡± David asked, pulling away.


    ¡°Obviously, this is what I want,¡± Louis said as though it actually was obvious. It was certainly not obvious to David. ¡°But that¡¯s my line. Is this what you want?¡±


    David bit his lip. The literal answer to the question was yes, David wanted this. But that wasn¡¯t really what Louis was asking. Louis was asking about something more than that. ¡°I don¡¯t know,¡± he answered honestly.


    Louis hummed and nodded thoughtfully as though that was the answer he was expecting. Was it that obvious that David had no clue what he was doing? Maybe it was, actually.


    David flushed looking down and feeling a little ashamed, but Louis didn''t pull away, his thumb just moved to trace over the curve of David''s ear making him shiver. Maybe Louis really didn¡¯t mind his inexperience.


    He looked a little disappointed by David¡¯s answer, though. David pulled back a little more, trying to get air back into his lungs. Louis''s hand tightened around his neck for an instant before relaxing and falling to his side. David was tempted to take it and put it back where it had been. Instead, he took another step back, dropping his own hands to his sides. They felt awkwardly empty now that they weren''t on Louis anymore.


    ¡°Then where do we go from here?¡± He searched Louis''s eyes as though he could find the answer to his own confusion in them.


    ¡°Wherever you want to go,¡± Louis said with annoying sincerity.


    David ran a frustrated hand through his hair. ¡°That''s a terrible idea," David said. "I don¡¯t know what I want, Lou. I don¡¯t know if I¡¯m interested in men like that¡ªI don¡¯t even know if I¡¯m interested in people like that.¡± He could feel his face turning bright red at that admission and ducked his head, covering his face with a hand. ¡°Christ. I think there¡¯s something wrong with me.¡±


    ¡°There¡¯s nothing wrong with you,¡± Louis said, wrapping a soft hand around David''s wrist to pull it from his face. David met his eyes. ¡°I¡¯m not asking you to predict the future. I¡¯m not asking you to tell me if this will work out.¡± His grip on David''s wrist moving down until they were holding hands instead. He gave David''s hand a squeeze.


    ¡°Then what are you asking?¡±


    ¡°I¡¯m asking if you want to try,¡± Louis said and he looked so good in the moonlight with his ears and nose pink from the chill that David was really struggling not to throw caution tot he wind and just lean in and kiss him again.


    "I''m asking if you''ll go out with me, David," Louis clarified. David hated him a little bit for how calm and rational he sounded.


    ¡°I don¡¯t want to hurt you,¡± David said honestly. ¡°And I don¡¯t want to disappoint you.¡±


    ¡°You won¡¯t disappoint me,¡± Louis said, ¡°no matter what happens.¡±


    ¡°But I might hurt you,¡± David pointed out. ¡°I don¡¯t know if I can give you what you want.¡±


    ¡°Don''t I get to decide whether it''s worth it to me?¡± Louis asked. And when he said it like that, it sounded perfectly rational, but it didn''t feel right. It felt like David was taking advantage of Louis''s interest for his own purposes.


    David shook his head slowly. ¡°I don¡¯t think it is. Because if this all goes wrong, I don¡¯t want you to hate me.¡±


    Louis considered that, his eyes drifting toward the river until they finally came back to catch David¡¯s again.


    ¡°That''s not a possibility. I know that I can¡¯t rationally promise you that I won¡¯t hate you, but I won¡¯t.¡± Louis was quiet for a moment, though David recognized it as the quiet he got while he figured out how to express his thoughts in words.


    ¡°Why?¡± David prompted.


    ¡°Because that¡¯s not what I feel for you,¡± he said slowly.


    ¡°Sure, you don¡¯t hate me now,¡± David said, rolling his eyes. ¡°But that doesn¡¯t mean that you won¡¯t hate me when I decide that I can¡¯t go through with it.¡±


    ¡°Because you don¡¯t know if you¡¯re interested in men¡ªinterested in me¡ªsexually?¡± Louis clarified.


    David nodded, his face somehow heating further. That was only part of it, but it was close enough for now.


    ¡°And you haven¡¯t figured that out yet,¡± Louis said.


    David flinched, trying to tug his hand out of Louis''s grip. This was exactly what he thought would happen if he shared that little secret. He shouldn¡¯t have been so stupid. Louis knew all about sex after all, didn¡¯t he? There wasn¡¯t much news about Louis in the media, but when there was, it was often in conjunction with his latest fling.


    ¡°Wait, David, I didn¡¯t mean it like that,¡± Louis said, grip tightening on his hand. ¡°I just mean, if you haven''t figured it out on your own but you don''t want to try anything with someone else because you haven''t figured it out, aren''t you just stuck? Why not try figuring it out with someone else?¡±


    ¡°Because I don¡¯t want anyone to get hurt!¡± David snapped.


    Louis''s hand was still around his hand like an iron band, but his thumb was starting to rub slow circles on the back of his wrist. The blanket had fallen from David¡¯s shoulders at some point and now pooled around his ankles. The cool air on his back cleared his head a little.


    ¡°I don¡¯t mind the idea of fooling around, David,¡± Louis said. David¡¯s stomach dropped a little at that and he looked away. That was both exactly what David wanted to hear and also exactly not what David wanted to hear. ¡°If you just afraid of hurting me, then you should put that out of your head. I can make my own decisions and I can protect myself.¡±


    ¡°So what are you proposing? That we head back to the hotel, get in bed, and see what happens?¡± David asked, a little more rudely than he really needed to. He wasn''t sure why the idea of it hurt so much.


    ¡°I don¡¯t want a one night stand, David," Louis said, meeting his eyes with all the intensity he had on the first day they met. "I want to be with you¡ªI want to date you. But if that isn''t what you want, if it doesn''t work out, I still want to be your friend."


    David¡¯s heart skipped a beat. He couldn¡¯t, for the life of him, understand why Louis would want that, especially after David had admitted to him that he wasn¡¯t sure he could feel that kind of desire for another person. He wasn¡¯t sure he could give Louis the kind relationship he wanted or deserved.


    ¡°I don¡¯t think that that¡¯s a good idea,¡± David pointed out. He wasn''t sure he could make Louis happy in the same way Louis made David happy.


    Louis''s smile quirked into something between fond and teasing.


    ¡°I¡¯m not sure that anything involving you is a good idea, but I still want it.¡± Louis''s hand started skimming up David¡¯s arm, trailing over his shoulder and neck until it was cupping his jaw again. Louis''s thumb stroked over David¡¯s cheek and David leaned into the touch, closing his eyes and only just restraining himself from stomping his foot.


    ¡°You¡¯re supposed to be the rational one,¡± David complained. "I''m too impulsive to give proper consideration to these kinds of decisions."


    ¡°I¡¯m willing to throw caution to the wind if you are,¡± Louis challenged.


    When David opened his eyes again, they had somehow ended up practically plastered together again. Maybe Louis had stepped forward. Maybe David had. It was hard to say. Either way, David couldn¡¯t keep his eyes from stealing down to Louis''s lips as he spoke.


    Instead of answering, David found himself leaning forward, pressing his lips into Louis''s. Stubble scraped against stubble and David found one of his hands sliding over that dragon embroidery to to tug at the hair at Louis''s nape.


    ¡°Fine,¡± David said when he could pull himself away. ¡°But I want it noted that this was all your idea.¡±


    ¡°Happy to take the blame, in this case,¡± Louis said.


    David could feel the rumble of laughter in Louis''s chest and wondered vaguely when his other hand had ended up pressed against his chest.


    "It''s almost one,¡± David muttered, glancing at his watch before he could be sucked into another kiss. If they kept this up, he wasn''t sure his impulsiveness wouldn''t start making even worse decisions.


    He wasn¡¯t sure if it was an invitation or a plea for escape, but Louis pulled back with a nod.


    David shivered and reached down to pick up the blanket. Pressed so close to Louis, he hadn¡¯t realized how cold it was getting, but by the time they were back in the car, he was shivering. Louis cranked the heat all the way up and David pulled the blanket up to his neck, sneaking glances at Louis and wondering if this was real.


    Was he actually dating Louis Greene?


    David turtled his neck down into the blanket and leaned his head against the seatbelt as he considered the choices that had brought him to this point. The gentle hum of the engine lulled him to sleep before they even reached the half-way mark back to Midtown.


    *****


    ¡°David,¡± Louis said, a warm hand jostling him awake. David yawned, looking blearily over at Louis. His perfectly kempt hair was mussed in the back where David had run his fingers through it and David had the giddy but terrifying realization that if he wanted to, he could actually do it again. If he wanted to, he could probably kiss him goodnight.


    He was allowed to kiss Louis Greene.


    It was like five-year-old his dream come true. Well, not exactly, but the essence of it was pretty close. What a terrifying thought.


    ¡°Sorry,¡± David said, straightening up and stretching a little so that his back popped. ¡°I didn¡¯t mean to fall asleep.¡±


    ¡°You¡¯re fine,¡± Louis said, sounding amused.


    ¡°Want to come up?¡± David asked. It seemed like the thing to do, though he wasn''t sure it was a good idea or what he''d do if Louis said yes.


    Despite agreeing to go out with Louis, David didn¡¯t want to ruin things. He didn¡¯t want to hurt Louis, either.


    Louis shook his head, though he looked at least a little reluctant. ¡°I need to get back to Rosemarie.¡±


    ¡°Are you okay to drive?¡± David asked, feeling bad for keeping him out so late.


    ¡°I¡¯m good. It¡¯s not that far,¡± Louis said.


    David had a hard time picturing any sort of drive he was so tired, but maybe Louis wasn¡¯t as exhausted as he was. He might really be a vampire. He didn¡¯t even look tired.


    David nodded, heart thundering in his chest. He didn¡¯t know where to go from here. But whatever had just changed between them, David didn¡¯t think it was a bad thing.


    "Goodnight," David said, and then he leaned in and did kiss Louis Greene goodnight.

 Chapter Thirteen

    They had kissed before, but for some reason that last, quick kiss in the car had felt different. Louis kept playing through it in his head and putting a smile on his face. He didn''t think he''d ever felt this ridiculous about a man before.


    He still couldn''t quite believe that David had agreed to go out with him.


    Louis thought back to the night before, trying to discern if he¡¯d pressured David into it. David had seemed willing¡ªGoodnight, he''d said and then leaned over the center console to kiss Louis¡ªbut he¡¯d also been drinking. Not a lot, he didn''t think, but Louis was not a good judge of alcohol tolerance and David had definitely been more forward than he usual.


    They needed to have another conversation when both of them were fully awake and sober. Louis needed to clear up that this was really what they both wanted or he''d never know peace.


    He needed to tell him about the letter, too.


    Louis hadn''t meant to keep it to himself. It didn''t seem like a big deal, really. It should have been something that could casually slip into a conversation and be laughed off. It was sweet, after all. At least, it was to Louis.


    But in the months they¡¯d spent together, David hadn¡¯t so much as mentioned music, let alone that he wrote it. If Louis hadn''t seen more than one image on his social media of David holding a guitar, he might have thought that David simply didn''t play music anymore. Not only that, but Louis had seen him carrying around his notebook, too, and on the odd occasion that David started humming to himself, he stopped as soon as he realized he was doing it.


    Louis wondered what his voice sounded like.


    He couldn''t really ask, though. He understood that it was a sore spot for David¡ªat least where Louis was concerned¡ªJennifer had said as much. Louis wondered if he should apologize or if that would just make things more awkward. He hated the idea that he''d made David uncomfortable¡ªmaybe even hurt him. It felt like something he should make up to David, though he wasn''t even sure how to approach the conversation let alone actually make it up to him.


    Then there was Rosemarie.


    Despite their don''t ask, don''t tell agreement, David was Rosemarie''s friend, too, and not mentioning that he was dating him felt a little too close to deception.


    Louis wasn''t looking forward to the conversation, though. She wouldn''t outright condemn it, but he knew she didn''t actually approve of homosexuality, either as a whole or as it related to Louis, specifically. She didn''t like the sensationalized queer lifestyle she perceived and she didn''t understand Louis''s attraction to other men. One of her most irritating traits, the one that caused the most tension in their relationship, was her refusal to try to understand or even accept ideas that shifted her paradigm.


    It would not be a fun conversation.


    And before he could do that, he needed to talk to David about talking to Rosemarie.


    It hadn''t even been twenty-four hours since filming ended, but Louis was already getting restless.


    During filming, he hadn¡¯t been happy, exactly, but he had been distracted. Now that he didn¡¯t even have that to prepare for on Monday, he was having trouble focusing on anything productive. Instead, his mind was whirring from David to Rosemarie to Night Mist and then back again.


    There was only one more season in his contract, but now he couldn¡¯t even decide whether he should be signing again or leaving after that.


    The hopeful part of him wondered if that would be enough time¡ªif Rosemarie would start getting better and he¡¯d need to stay for another season.


    Realistically, though, she didn''t have that much time. Not without the kind of miracle that Louis didn''t believe in.


    When he left Weldstone Harbor, he had given himself two years. Two years, had seemed like, if not enough, then at least a time he could cherish with his sister. He could be away from the coast and Weldstone Harbor for that long. He would spend every moment he could with Rosemarie and then he would go back to Weldstone and his real life.


    Louis was not a selfless person, he knew what he wanted and he strove for it, regardless of the cost. But it was starting to feel like it wasn''t just his decision anymore. He was starting to see how everyone else was tangled up in this decision, too. How David was tangled up in all of this.


    They were professionals. David would understand the realities of a long-distance relationship being a possibility. And he had lived in Weldstone Harbor, too. But what if David asked him to stay?


    It wasn''t only David''s life that would be impacted, either, but the entire cast and crew of Night Mist.


    When Louis left, they would either have to re-cast his part, write him off the show, or at the very least rebrand it. Louis hadn''t considered what a nightmare he was creating for everyone else. Rebranding might work out for David, though. He could take over the show. He loved it in a way that Louis just didn¡¯t, after all.


    Selfishly, Louis didn¡¯t want that, either. Louis wanted David to come back to Weldstone Harbor with him. He was going to lose Rosemarie and there was nothing he could do about it. He didn¡¯t want to lose David, too.


    So much for his assurances that he was prepared for heartache. He didn''t regret it, either, though.


    Louis dropped his forehead to the steering wheel as he sat out front of the pharmacy, waiting for Rosemarie to finish running in to grab an ice cream cone. He had been warned multiple times by multiple people, but Louis had never been great at listening to good advice. No matter what happened, someone was going to get hurt.


    And Louis didn¡¯t even care. He just wanted... He just wanted.


    ¡°You drunk?¡± a sharp voice asked, rapping on the roof of the car.


    Louis''s head snapped up to see Jennifer Yang peering through the window at him. Louis straightened, feeling heat creeping up his neck.


    ¡°Leave him alone,¡± David¡¯s instantly recognizable voice said from behind her. David came into view as Jennifer leaned against the hood. David leaned down through the window, a bright smile on his face. Louis''s lips curved up in answer.


    ¡°She¡¯s just bitter that I had a good time last night and she didn¡¯t,¡± David said in a gleeful tone, giving him a wink. Louis raised an eyebrow. The other one followed suit when Jennifer glared at David in a most unamused way.


    He was clearly missing some context, but wasn¡¯t about to ask.


    David leaned down on the open window so he could talk to Louis. ¡°Why are you sitting here?¡±


    ¡°Waiting for Rosemarie,¡± Louis said, leaning back in his seat just to give himself a little more room to breathe.


    David looked beautiful and golden in the sunlight, and Louis almost wanted to kiss him. He could, he thought. He didn¡¯t think that Jennifer would mind. And it sounded like David had already told her, so he probably wouldn¡¯t mind either.


    ¡°You made your sister go in while you waited in the car?¡± David said, sounding aghast.


    Louis shrugged.


    ¡°She wanted ice cream,¡± he said. ¡°I did not. This is a compromise.¡± They were parked just outside the door and Louis didn''t bother trying to baby her¡ªthat was just a recipe for disaster.


    David laughed. ¡°Ice cream in the cold?¡±


    ¡°She¡¯s peculiar like that. Besides, she says after living here for a couple years, you grow accustomed to cold.¡±


    ¡°I don¡¯t know about that,¡± David said with a laugh.


    ¡°I certainly don¡¯t intend to grow accustomed to it,¡± Louis said. ¡°I hate the snow.¡±


    ¡°I have something for you, by the way,¡± David said softly, though there was something almost amused in his eyes. His smile said he was up to mischief, and Louis gave him a warning look.


    Before he could ask what it was, David had leaned all the way through the window. Their lips met awkwardly at first, the kiss chaste. Louis hesitated for a split second before losing himself in the feeling. His hand came up to adjust the position of David''s head, deepening the kiss before David could pull away. His fingers smoothed over David''s ear and the hairs at the side of his head rasped against his finger tips. He smelled like something both heady and deep that Louis associated only with David.


    Too soon, David pulled back, though he looked pleased.


    ¡°Just that,¡± David said.


    Louis gave David a small smile feeling warm affection spread through his chest. Jennifer rolling her eyes at them through the windshield.


    With a little jolt, Louis recognized a floral print figure walking toward them carrying a bag in one hand and an ice cream cone in the other. Louis had to wonder if it wasn¡¯t retail therapy sustaining her and not chemo. She seemed to come home with a new knickknack or useless kitchen appliance every day.


    He couldn¡¯t quite make out her expression, but there was no way she hadn''t seen them. He cursed his lack of forethought. This was not how he meant to break the news to Rosemarie, but it was a little too late for that now.


    Louis''s gaze must have caught David¡¯s attention because he ducked out of the window and straightened up. His face lit up when he caught sight of Rosemarie, and he jogged over to her like an excited puppy, taking the bag she was carrying.


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    Whatever Rosemarie felt about the kiss seemed to be second to her fondness for David, because she smiled at him and offered him a lick of her ice cream.


    ¡°What are you doing here?¡± Rosemarie asked David as they approached. Louis got out of the car to open the trunk for her.


    ¡°We saw this most practical and fuel efficient vehicle in the parking lot and, figuring it is the only one of its kind in this place, we came to say hi.¡±


    ¡°That¡¯s true,¡± Rosemarie said, not looking at Louis, ¡°most people in Midtown consider a practical vehicle one that can get out of a snowdrift and pull a horse trailer."


    ¡°That sounds appropriate,¡± Jennifer said, eyeing the Prius as though her Mustang was a credible snow vehicle. ¡°Does this even have four wheel drive? I¡¯m Jennifer Yang, by the way.¡± She introduced herself when David and Louis failed to do so.


    Rosemarie offered her hand to Jennifer with a smile. ¡°Jennifer, I¡¯ve heard so much about you from David. I¡¯m Rosemarie, Louis''s sister.¡±


    ¡°It¡¯s a pleasure to meet you,¡± Jennifer said. Louis stared at her suspiciously. Her brusqueness was actually bordering on polite today. It made Louis wonder if she had an ulterior motive.


    ¡°Why don¡¯t you two join us for lunch?¡± Rosemarie offered.


    ¡°We¡¯ve just eaten,¡± David declined apologetically. "Would you like to join us for a movie later? Jennifer and I were going to go see Zombies of Alcatraz. It¡¯s not about vampires, but Jennifer worked on the visual effects for it.¡±


    ¡°I didn¡¯t work on it, my company did,¡± Jennifer corrected.


    ¡°You¡¯re in visual effects?¡± Rosemarie asked.


    ¡°Special effects, actually, but David, apparently, knows nothing about the film industry,¡± she said glaring over at her friend who just smirked at her.


    ¡°What do you think? Up for a movie?¡± Rosemarie turned to him. She didn''t seem too upset and she did look genuinely interested in going to the movie.


    Louis nodded, trying to figure out how to interact with this particular group of people.


    ¡°A movie sounds... entertaining,¡± he said.


    ¡°Don¡¯t sound so enthusiastic, it doesn''t fit your image,¡± David said dryly, elbowing him in the ribs. Louis casually bumped his shoulder hard enough that David stumbled and laughed.


    ¡°I don¡¯t really like movies,¡± he said.


    ¡°Of course you don¡¯t,¡± David said gleefully. ¡°But will you go with us anyway? Otherwise, I¡¯m stealing Rosemarie because she shows the proper level of enthusiasm.¡±


    ¡°Not on any normal scale,¡± Louis groused.


    ¡°I¡¯ll take that as a yes,¡± David said, before giving Rosemarie a kiss on the cheek and Louis a slug on the shoulder and returning to Jennifer¡¯s car.


    This was not how he had seen his day going and he wasn''t quite sure how he had ended up in a position to where he was about to be stuck with Jennifer, Rosemarie, and David. All at once. In a dark theater, where Louis was almost positive the only thing he¡¯d be thinking about was the way David tasted and the warmth of his skin in the autumn air.


    *****


    ¡°We were not about to go see Zombies of Alcatraz,¡± Jennifer said as soon as they got in the car.


    David shrugged guiltily and gave her a pleading look. ¡°I had to think of something quickly before they got way!¡±


    ¡°You have Louis''s number, you could have just texted him to come over,¡± she said. ¡°That¡¯s a perfectly acceptable thing to do when you are dating.¡±


    David shrunk into his seat. It wasn¡¯t that he didn¡¯t want to be alone with Louis. But, well, he was nervous. He wasn''t exactly sure what Louis expected of him now. With Jennifer and Rosemarie there, nothing too intimate could happen.


    ¡°I wanted to invite Rosemarie, too,¡± David said lamely.


    Jennifer gave him a flatly disbelieving look. ¡°Really? You¡¯re afraid of being alone with Louis, now?¡± she said. ¡°You are such a loser sometimes. You just fucking kissed him in the middle of the parking lot. What¡¯s there to be shy about now?¡±


    ¡°Well, that was impulsive,¡± David said. ¡°I wasn¡¯t thinking. Now, I am. And now I¡¯m realizing that I have no idea how to date. Jennifer, how do you date?¡±


    ¡°I don¡¯t. I think dating is a waste of time.¡±


    ¡°Okay, but if you did date, how would you do it?¡±


    ¡°I wouldn¡¯t.¡±


    ¡°If you were me, and you did date, and you were dating Louis, then how would you date Louis?¡± he asked. ¡°If you were me, hypothetically.¡±


    ¡°Then I would just do whatever it is that you two enjoy doing. Starting out with not inviting your friend and his sister along for the date."


    David groaned.


    "You¡¯re overthinking this, David. You¡¯ve spent more time with Louis since you got here than you have with me!¡±


    ¡°That¡¯s not true! Or, it¡¯s only true if you count work hours. I am very equitable with my time,¡± David protested.


    ¡°You are not at all equitable with your time,¡± Jennifer said, jabbing him in the arm with a sharp claw. ¡°Not that I mind. I just don¡¯t like to see you deluding yourself.¡±


    ¡°Sure you don¡¯t,¡± David said. ¡°Really, though, what do I do about Louis?¡±


    ¡°First, I have to make sure because you are very naive and gullible, is this what you want?¡±


    David sighed. ¡°Why does everyone keep asking me that?¡±


    ¡°Because you are very naive and gullible, weren¡¯t you listening?¡± Jennifer said. ¡°Is it what you want?¡±


    ¡°Yes, it¡¯s what I want. Probably. I want to try,¡± David said. ¡°I like kissing him.¡±


    ¡°Good to know,¡± Jennifer said, making a face that said it was very much not good to know.


    ¡°I still don¡¯t know what to do,¡± David prompted.


    ¡°You need to relax and be normal,¡± she said. ¡°From what you¡¯ve said, Louis seems to understand. I¡¯m not sure why you¡¯re still worried about it.¡±


    David fidgeted in his seat. ¡°Because understanding and actually knowing are different things. I¡¯m not sure that Louis really does know and I don¡¯t want to disappoint him.¡±


    ¡°Why does it matter if you disappoint him?¡± Jennifer demanded.


    ¡°He¡¯s my friend,¡± David said, offended that she thought he could be so callous.


    ¡°It didn¡¯t matter when it was me,¡± she pointed out.


    David opened his mouth and then closed it again. ¡°We were fourteen.¡±


    ¡°Are you saying you had more courage at fourteen than you do at twenty three?¡±


    ¡°I might have, yes,¡± David said, then actually paused to think about it. ¡°Ugh. No. That¡¯s not it, either.¡±


    ¡°You weren¡¯t afraid of losing me, were you?¡±


    That actually made a lot of sense. ¡°You were already my best friend. We¡¯d been together for ages. It didn¡¯t even occur to me that it might change if I asked you out. And it didn¡¯t. Besides, our mothers would have forced us together again anyway. There was nothing to worry about.¡±


    ¡°You¡¯re afraid of losing him, though?¡± she asked.


    David nodded slowly. That was true. He wasn''t sure it was everything, but it was a big part of everything.


    Jennifer rolled her eyes. ¡°Only you would be more worried to date someone because you love them.¡±


    ¡°I don¡¯t love him,¡± David said immediately. He was starting to feel claustrophobic in the car and had to resist the urge to roll down the window and ruin Jennifer''s hair. ¡°No, I do love him, but not love love him. I love him like a friend love him.¡±


    ¡°Like a friend that you like kissing,¡± Jennifer said, emphasizing the last word with a sharp bob of her head.


    David opened his mouth and shut it again. ¡°Like that, yes,¡± David said.


    ¡°Davie," Jennifer said, sounding a lot more patient than usual. "Far be it for me to tell you how you feel, but it certainly sounds like what you have with Louis¡ªlet alone what you want with Louis¡ªis not the same as what you have with me, now or then.¡±


    David looked at her for a moment in disbelief. Jennifer snorted at his expression when she glanced over but didn¡¯t push the subject further.


    ¡°Look up the movie time and let Louis know, then,¡± Jennifer said. ¡°But I¡¯m sneaking out half way through and ditching all of you because I have a prior engagement.¡±


    ¡°That¡¯s mean.¡±


    ¡°That¡¯s what happens when you don''t arrange dates properly. Besides, that way you can drive home with your date¡ªand his sister, because you are infuriatingly dense.¡±


    ¡°Fine. How does 3:30 sound?¡±


    *****


    Jennifer had not been lying about ditching him. David shouldn''t have doubted her, but he was still somehow surprised when she squeezed past them half way through the movie, whispering something into Louis''s ear before leaving the auditorium.


    Rosemarie gave him a worried look, but David just shrugged hoping that his wasn¡¯t putting Louis and Rosemarie out too much. He should get a car. Especially if he was going to be here for another season. Maybe he could borrow Jennifer¡¯s.


    No, actually, he didn¡¯t want to do that. If he so much as scratched it, he was pretty sure she¡¯d kill him.


    Maybe he''d just learn to hitchhike.


    Louis leaned over the armrest between them and whispered, ¡°You mind coming back with us? Jennifer said she got a work 911.¡±


    ¡°She¡¯s lying,¡± David hissed back.


    Louis smile was knowing and he nodded. ¡°I figured. What could she possibly have to do now that filming is over, but we weren¡¯t doing anything after. I¡¯m sure Rosemarie won¡¯t mind.¡±


    ¡°You don¡¯t have plans?¡± David asked, wanting to make sure.


    Someone behind them shushed them loudly and David fell silent. Louis glared back at them, but didn¡¯t say anything. He did, however, reach over and give David¡¯s knee a quick squeeze. David¡¯s face heated and his heart raced as he glanced surreptitiously at Rosemarie to see if she had noticed. Thankfully, her eyes were glued to the screen. It seemed that zombies were up her alley, too.


    He wondered, suddenly, how much Rosemarie knew about him and Louis. Had Louis told her? It hadn''t really occurred to him before now, but he thought that Louis had said that they didn''t really talk about his relationships. What if she was upset that David was dating Louis? Maybe she would have rather he stayed friends with him instead of being something more.


    If this didn¡¯t work out, would he still be able to keep his promise?


    The movie ended without anything too dramatic happening¡ªoutside of the film that was. The film ended with a zombie explosion of epic proportions that took out half of California. David offered to take them to dinner, but Rosemarie begged out, saying she was far too tired. She didn¡¯t look tired, but David wasn¡¯t about to argue with her on that point.


    ¡°If you need to get going, you can drop me back at the B&B?¡± David said, hating that it came out more like a question than a statement. Part of him really wanted Louis to tell him that he''d drop Rosemarie off instead, so they could go out to dinner, but part of him also was terrified he''d say exactly that.


    "We could¡ª" Louis began and he knew exactly where that sentence was going.


    "I''m sorry to make you drive me," David cut in, glancing from Louis to Rosemarie. "I feel bad. We''re closer to the B&B anyway, so you can drop me off on your way. Thanks for spending the afternoon with me."


    ¡°Yeah, all right,¡± Louis said, though David thought he looked a little upset.


    "It''s no trouble," Rosemarie said, frowning between them. She didn''t offer any alternatives, though, and David had never been so thankful for the radio as his ability to converse seemed to have deserted him in the face of Rosemarie''s potential disapproval of his relationship with Louis and Louis''s general Louis-ness.


    By the time they were back outside the B&B, David was pretty sure he was going to suffocate from the tension in the air. He barely managed a smile and a goodbye before he was out the door and up the stairs to his room.


    He hadn''t thought things would be weird after agreeing to go out with Louis. And they hadn''t been that afternoon! Why had it all suddenly gotten weird now?


    Maybe Jennifer was right and he should have actually called Louis to have a conversation, a date, even, before bringing him along to... whatever that afternoon was. With his sister. If you counted Jennifer as David''s sister¡ªwhich she practically was¡ªit was basically with both of their sisters. It was like they were being chaperoned.


    That must have been the lamest date in the history of dates. Louis must be regretting this whole thing.


    David collapsed down on the bed and buried his face in the pillow. He was a loser and also a dick. A complete and utter dick.


    Louis hadn¡¯t done anything wrong and David was pretty sure that he had upset him today, even hurt him.


    He was a coward. He should have gone to dinner with Louis. He wanted to go to dinner with Louis. But he was also afraid to go to dinner with Louis. Should he have agreed anyway? But in front of Rosemarie? Did she even know? Was it weird that he didn''t, even as a friend? What if that wasn''t even what Louis had been about to say?


    It was a mess. David was a mess.


    Sure, he had warned Louis that this would happen, but it wasn¡¯t really Louis''s fault that he didn¡¯t understand just how broken David was when it came to love and romance and being a human in general. Jennifer was the only one who seemed to be able to stand David¡¯s ineptitudes for long periods of time.


    Grabbing blindly for his phone, David mumbled for it to dial Jennifer.


    It rang once before she picked up. She didn¡¯t even greet him before asking what he¡¯d done.


    ¡°I think I messed it up already,¡± he said.


    ¡°You''ve been alone for," there was a pause, "an hour and a half. And most of that was in the theater. What did you do, dump your green tea in his lap?"


    "Possibly worse," David said. "I panicked."


    Jennifer sighed and David explained the situation to her.


    "Have you even talked to him yet? I don''t mean about this, I mean about everything. And I mean without anyone chaperoning you, too.¡±


    David made a noncommittal noise. ¡°We talked last night."


    ¡°No, I mean today. I''m not the one you should be talking to about your relationship. You¡¯re both adults so grow up, take your man on a date, and see where it goes.¡±


    With that, Jennifer hung up. David glared at the phone. He knew she was right, he even navigated down his contact list to Louis''s name. His thumb, though, didn¡¯t seem to want to hit send.


    David dropped the phone on the pillow next to him and stared at it, willing it to call Louis for him.

 Chapter Fourteen

    The drive back to Rosemarie''s house was torturously silent, but once he''d pulled into the garage, neither of them immediately moved to leave the car.


    "I''m dating David," Louis said. Rosemarie''s face was drawn and she stared straight out the window.


    "I''m happy for you. David is a good kid," she said in a measured tone.


    Louis let out an exasperated sigh, hands falling from the steering wheel. ¡°I know you aren¡¯t, really. And I know you don¡¯t approve of me sleeping with other men, but I wish you¡¯d at least try to be happy for me. I really like him.¡±


    ¡°I know you like him,¡± she said stiffly. ¡°I like him too.¡±


    ¡°You just wish I only liked him as a friend,¡± Louis guessed.


    ¡°It¡¯s not that,¡± she said, hesitantly, ¡°I¡¯m just not sure it¡¯s a good idea.¡±


    ¡°Right, because he¡¯s a man,¡± Louis said, all his frustration making him want to lash out, to get some sort of honest reaction from her. He turned in his seat, unclipping his seatbelt to face her fully.


    "Not because of that," she said. "It would have made it easier for you if he weren''t, but you''re a grown man. You can make your own decisions about that."


    ¡°About being gay, you mean?¡± Louis said.


    Rosemarie gave him an irritated look and for once Louis didn¡¯t care how small and frail she looked sitting in the seat next to him. He wanted her to understand, he wanted her to accept it, he wanted her to just fucking acknowledge it. He just wanted something real from her, something that meant that she really understood, that she saw him.


    ¡°Louis, stop being difficult,¡± she said, meeting his gaze with answering frustration. ¡°There are plenty of reasons that you should think about this before getting involved with David that have nothing to do with your inclinations.¡±


    Louis ground his teeth. ¡°Such as?¡±


    "Such as the fact that you are colleagues. Such as the fact that you''re friends. Such as the fact that you are planning on leaving Midtown and the show when I''m gone," she snapped, counting off each point on her fingers.


    Louis winced. "You don''t think I''ve considered those things?" he retorted, though even he had to admit that his interest in David didn''t skew towards being particularly rational. Those considerations were peripheral when faced with how much he just wanted to be with David.


    ¡°Even if you have considered those factors, is it the same for David? He didn¡¯t seem interested in being more than friends when I spoke to him.¡±


    Ice cut through Louis''s veins. ¡°You talked to him?¡± Louis demanded. ¡°When?¡±


    ¡°Before the party,¡± she said. ¡°And don¡¯t you dare look at me like that. We were just talking.¡±


    Was that why David was so hesitant? Had Rosemarie given the impression that she disapproved, or that it wasn''t a good idea?


    The thought of her talking to David about their relationship when she wouldn''t even talk to Louis about it irked him. There were so many things she could have said, and so many things that she had learned to say without actually saying anything. That felt like an odd sort of betrayal¡ªif she was going to disapprove, he wished she''d just do it to his face.


    ¡°Why do you always have to meddle in everything?¡± Louis said to hide the way his eyes were starting to sting.


    ¡°I wasn¡¯t meddling! We were talking," she shot back. "And I don¡¯t have to explain myself to you, Louis.¡±


    It was more than he could handle. "Fine," he ground out, slamming the door after him and walking straight into the house. He wanted to lock himself in his room until he had a chance to cool off, but Rosemarie didn''t seem ready to let it go. She stormed in after him.


    ¡°I don¡¯t know why you are so upset,¡± Rosemarie said. "I haven''t said anything against your relationship, I only said you should think it through!"


    ¡°I¡¯m upset because you never said anything," Louis said, spinning on her. "You never say anything. You never talk to me about any of this. You went behind my back to talk to my friend about it before you ever talked to me."


    ¡°We weren¡¯t¡ª¡± she said, then trailed off when she caught the look on Louis''s face.


    "I''m going to ask him to come back to Weldstone Harbor with me next week," Louis said, tone almost defiant.


    "You''re leaving next week?" her tone was so surprised that Louis finally looked at her. She had gone a little pale and the resigned hurt in her eyes was enough to cut the anger right out of him.


    He sucked in a breath and ran both hands over his head, closing his eyes until he felt his calm returning.


    "No, of course not," he said, then shook his head. "Or, yes, but I''ll be back. I''m attending Avery''s wedding, remember?"


    "Oh, of course," she said, though she still sounded hesitant.


    None of this was fair. He wanted to stay mad at her, but how could he stay mad at her when he didn''t know how much longer he would have her.


    He took a hesitant step forward, eyes on the ground between them. Her expression softened and she opened her arms. Louis gave in immediately, wrapping his arms around her and burying his nose in her shoulder, seeking that particular kind of comfort he couldn''t get anywhere else.


    One thin arm rubbed up and down against his back while the other pressed his head more firmly to her shoulder as though he were still a child. Louis inhaled the scent of chemicals and roses that clung to her skin and wished that he could go back to a time when all of this was straight forward.


    ¡°I¡¯m sorry for yelling,¡± Louis mumbled.


    Rosemarie just rocked them gently back and forth for a moment.


    ¡°Do you love him, Lou?¡± she whispered against his ear, her fingers smoothing over his hair.


    ¡°I don¡¯t know,¡± Louis said softly. ¡°But I think I could.¡±


    She gave a soft hum of acknowledgement before it turned into something else. It had been a long time since she¡¯d sung to him, but the hum turned into a soft melody.


    Louis closed his eyes and just stood there at the garage door, listening and trying to commit everything about this feeling to his memory.


    He didn¡¯t know how long they stayed like that before Rosemarie pulled away from him, though her hand lingered on the side of his face.


    ¡°I need to sit down,¡± she said, almost apologetically.


    Louis stomach clenched at the drawn look on her face. She had started the day with such enthusiasm that he felt especially guilty for making her look like this now.


    ¡°All right,¡± Louis said, following her up to the living room. ¡°I¡¯ll make something for dinner.¡±


    ¡°I want to talk to you first,¡± she said, catching his hand before he could turn away. "I want to talk about you and David. Really talk."


    Louis wasn''t sure he was ready to have any kind of conversation, let alone this conversation. But hadn''t her silence been the thing that hurt the most? Maybe it was time to get it out in the open once and for all. Louis sat down beside her and nodded, even though he couldn''t bring himself to look at anything but his hands where they rested in his lap.


    ¡°Lou,¡± Rosemarie began slowly, "I know that I''m not good at this, but more than anything, I love you. You know that, right? That I''ll always love you?"


    Louis swallowed and met her eyes. "I know. I love you, too."


    She nodded before continuing. "I don¡¯t understand it¡ªnot why you like boys or why you want to pursue David.¡±


    ¡°You think I do?¡± Louis cut in. ¡°I know all of the reasons that I shouldn¡¯t, believe me. But I still want to. I still want him.¡±


    ¡°What will happen if it doesn¡¯t work out? I know that his friendship is important to you, too. I''ve never seen you share so much of yourself with a friend before. And I''m afraid for you. I don''t want you to lose that kind of friendship if dating him doesn''t work out."


    Louis closed his eyes, trying to ignore how much it hurt to hear Rosemarie ask that. It hurt all the more because Louis had been asking himself the same question. What if it didn''t work out? What would he do then? Could he still have David in his life or would he lose him completely?


    ¡°I know,¡± he said, voice thick. ¡°But I can¡¯t keep dancing around this with him. I can¡¯t watch him and not want more with him. I need to find out one way or the other and hope that if it doesn¡¯t work, he¡¯ll forgive me.¡±


    Louis pressed the tips of his fingers into his eyes, taking a moment to just breathe.


    ¡°I don¡¯t want you to get hurt,¡± she said softly.


    Louis looked at her then. She was sitting with her feet curled up under her. Louis was struck again by how small she had become. Once such a full-figured woman, she seemed to have melted with the chemo. Her long brown curls had slowly fallen out until enough was gone that Rosemarie had asked him to shave the rest off. She had chatted happily the entire time he had cut her hair, but he had heard her sobbing once she got to her room. Remembering it made Louis''s throat tighten.


    What was he doing?


    None of this was the right timing. It wasn''t the right time for this conversation. It wasn''t the right time to date. It wasn''t the right time to get involved with the man he could credibly call his best friend. His stomach twisted.


    Maybe Rosemarie was right and he was just making a mess of things. David could do better than Louis, and he doubtless would once he got out into the world more. Everyone had warned him not to get too invested¡ªwhat he and David had was an experiment. If neither of them got serious, neither of them would get hurt.


    Much.


    ¡°I won''t get hurt," he assured her. "I know what I''m getting into.¡±


    She frowned at him like she knew that was a lie, but it was a lie she wanted to hear, so she let it drop.


    ¡°I¡¯m not very hungry,¡± Rosemarie said. ¡°I think that I¡¯m just going to go to bed.¡±


    ¡°You should eat something,¡± Louis said, standing to at least get her a nutritional shake in the gross strawberry flavor she preferred. She accepted it, but as soon as she¡¯d drunk half, she excused herself to bed.


    ¡°I love you, Lou,¡± she said before disappearing through her door.


    ¡°Love you, too,¡± Louis returned, sitting down heavily on the couch. He leaned his head back against the cushion and checked his phone.


    David still hadn¡¯t texted him or called.


    They had left off in a really weird place this afternoon and Louis still wasn¡¯t sure what had gone wrong. David had seemed off after the movie¡ªas though he was nervous around Louis. Or as though he didn''t want to be around Louis anymore.


    Unauthorized use: this story is on Amazon without permission from the author. Report any sightings.


    It wouldn''t have been such a strange reaction except that David hadn''t behaved like this at all when Louis had kissed him the first time. He wasn''t sure what was different now.


    Louis wondered again if he had pressured him. Especially given that he''d been drinking. Had David thought better of it but was too nice to tell him to fuck off?


    Louis hoped not. When David had kissed him that morning it hadn''t seemed like he wanted to end things. But even if he did, Louis wouldn¡¯t stop him. He knew from the beginning that David might not be attracted to him like that and he''d accepted it.


    No matter what, though, he felt he should make it clear to David that he was allowed to end it. That Louis certainly wasn¡¯t going to be bitter about it. He had gone into this knowing exactly what he was getting into.


    Louis picked up his phone, finger hovering over David''s chat log for a moment, then pocketed it. He really didn¡¯t want to text something like this, and if he called there was room to be both overheard and misunderstood. What he really wanted was to talk to David in person. To see him.


    He hesitated for a moment longer then left a note on the kitchen counter that he was going for a drive. It was only half a lie and he couldn¡¯t bring himself to say that he was going to see David even if he suspected Rosemarie would know.


    The road was quiet and the drive only took thirteen minutes. It was only after he''d pulled into the parking lot that, he had any second thoughts.


    If David was trying to avoid him, shouldn¡¯t he respect that? Maybe a phone call was better. He pulled his phone out of his pocket, fumbling it in surprise when it started ringing.


    He let out a disbelieving breath of laughter as he checked the caller ID and put it to his ear.


    ¡°I¡¯m sorry,¡± David said in a rush.


    Louis''s stomach dropped, but he''d been prepared for this.


    "Hello, to you, too, David."


    *****


    David let out a self-deprecating chuckle and started again.


    "Oh, right, sorry, hi," David said.


    Louis had answered, at least. That had to be a good sign. He wished that he could see Louis''s expression though, just so he knew if he was angry about today or not. There was an awkward pause before David collected himself.


    ¡°Right. Louis,¡± David said, then wasn¡¯t sure how to continue. ¡°Sorry. About today.¡±


    ¡°You didn''t do anything to apologize for,¡± Louis said, then let out a breath. ¡°Actually, I think I should apologize. I didn¡¯t mean to pressure you.¡±


    That wasn''t what he had expected. David frowned. "What do you mean? You didn''t pressure me."


    David had been the one to kiss Louis earlier? And force him into a friend date?


    "To go out with me," Louis clarified.


    David was being weird, just like Jennifer said, and Louis had noticed. David groaned flopping back on the bed.


    ¡°No. You didn''t. That¡¯s not it," David said, then wasn''t sure exactly how to explain.


    "Then what is it?" Louis asked carefully. "You don''t have to..." Louis paused, then rephrased his sentence. "You can tell me the truth."


    "It is the truth. I just got nervous,¡± David admitted. That wasn''t all of it, but he didn''t know how to explain it. ¡°I don''t think I can explain properly over the phone. I need to see you.¡±


    Louis chuckled. ¡°I understand completely.¡± There was a pause, then, ¡°Come downstairs?¡±


    ¡°What?¡±


    ¡°Come downstairs. I¡¯m outside.¡±


    ¡°What? Why? Why didn''t you start with that?¡± David asked, already out of bed and throwing on a pair of sweat pants and a hoodie.


    ¡°David.¡±


    He didn¡¯t bother hanging up, instead choosing to listen to the quiet sound of Louis''s breathing as he bolted down the stairs, wincing as he realized that he was probably waking up all of the neighbors. He tiptoed more quietly out the door.


    David still had the phone stuck to his ear when he saw Louis. He was wearing the same thing he was earlier, but David noticed again, how ethereal he looked in the moonlight. Louis moved his own phone from his ear and pocketed it. It took David a little longer to do the same, only to realize his sweat pants didn¡¯t have pockets and put it bashfully in his hoodie instead.


    ¡°Hey,¡± David said.


    Louis raised an eyebrow as David approached, coming to stand awkwardly in front of him, his hands still in his pockets.


    ¡°Hey,¡± Louis mimicked.


    David licked his lips, trying for the life of him to remember what it was that he wanted to say. Now that Louis was here, he kind of just wanted to kiss him again.


    "I should have called before showing up,¡± Louis said, ¡°but I had something important to talk to you about. And I wanted to see you."


    Louis''s expression was soft and fond in a way that made David fidget.


    "I wasn¡¯t sure if you wanted to see me, though,¡± Louis continued and David realized just how ridiculous he was being.


    "Sorry," David muttered again, grimacing. He hated that he''d made Louis feel that way. "I know I was being weird, but it''s not that I didn''t want to see you. I always want to see you. To a ridiculous extend, really. I just started overthinking things."


    Louis was quiet for a moment before he leaned back agains this car, arms folded across his chest in that way that looked casual only if you were a model. Luckily for Louis, he was basically a model.


    "What were you thinking about?" Louis asked.


    Of course he would ask. David gave a half-shrug, feeling embarrassed, but answered anyway. "I started wondering if it was a good idea," he started, then shook his head. That wasn''t really the point. "Even if it isn''t, I don''t think I care¡ªnot as much as I probably should. Not that I think you''re not a good idea, just, I''m not sure that this is a good idea." He gestured between them, then shook his head again. "But that''s not the point. The point is that I don''t know what I''m doing. That''s what I was thinking. And then I got nervous. And then I made things weird."


    Louis studied him for long enough that David shifted uncomfortably, then ducked his head with a chuckle, rubbing at the back of his neck. "Sorry. I''m a mess. Like I said, I don''t know what I''m doing."


    ¡°There¡¯s no rulebook,¡± Louis said at last, his tone almost teasing. "And I don''t mind the mess."


    David snorted.


    Louis gave him a slow smile, then stepped closer, unfolding his arms to cup David¡¯s neck with a warm hand. David leaned into the touch. ¡°You should do whatever you want to do, David," he said, his eyes so dark and intent as they searched David''s. "I want help you figure it out, so you can explore all you want. You don''t need to be nervous about it. And if you want to end it, you can do that, too.¡±


    His hand started to drop from his neck and David reached up to catch it, keeping it pressed snug against his skin. Something in Louis''s expression shifted in a way that made David''s heart pound. He tried to keep his breath steady even as his eyes drifted down to Louis''s lips.


    ¡°I don¡¯t want to end it,¡± David said. Of that, he was certain. Right now, not a single thought he had was about ending it.


    He forced his gaze up to meet Louis''s and he was certain that Louis wanted to kiss him, too. Still, he made no move to do so, seemingly content¡ªunfairly, in David''s opinion¡ªto let David make the move. David swallowed. This seemed different than the kiss this morning. That had been impulsive. He''d just seen Louis and he''d wanted to kiss him so he had done so without giving it a second thought.


    Right now, there was too much room for thought. His breathing felt unsteady as he shuffled a little closer. He didn''t know exactly what to do, but Louis had said he could explore all he wanted.


    The next thing he registered was the way Louis''s lips tasted like mint chapstick so strong that it almost burned. David''s hands took the invitation to heart, running up and down Louis''s chest, brushing open the flaps of his bomber jacket, and catching on the buttons of his shirt. Louis made a pleased sound, and brought his other hand up to settle on David''s lower back, the unexpected heat of it making David gasp a little into Louis''s mouth.


    The air felt chilly against the flush of his skin, but every place that Louis touched seemed to burn with fever. David stepped even closer, pressing himself into Louis, until they were as close as he could get them, pressed together from hip to chest. Somehow, even that wasn''t enough. David let out a frustrated noise and wrapped one arm up around Louis''s neck, wanting him even closer.


    Almost as soon as he''d had the thought, Louis was surging forward, knocking David off balance and spinning their bodies until David was the one pressed back up against the car, the on David''s back moving to grip his hip almost too tightly. David felt unmoored. He was certain he would have slid to the ground if not for the knee pressed between his legs and Louis''s weight pinning him to the car. A shiver ran through him and his hand scrabbled at Louis''s hair, making an approving sound into his mouth.


    "Louis," David said, just to say his name. His voice sounded breathless and rough.


    "David," Louis returned, nipping down David''s jaw until he was pressing frustratingly gentle kisses into his neck. David tipped his head to the side, wanting more of that.


    A car door slammed somewhere in the distance and David jumped so hard that he nearly unbalanced them both. Louis pulled back, a mischievous grin on his face that David was tempted to trace with his fingers and then probably his lips.


    ¡°You don''t seem so nervous now," Louis teased. "Apparently vampires don¡¯t burn up in the sun, they just get flighty.¡± A shiver shot up his spine as Louis''s hands ran up and down his sides in a way that made his sweatshirt ride up a couple inches to expose a sliver of skin to the cool air.


    ¡°Shut up," David groused, though it was ruined by a stuttering inhale as Louis''s fingers dipped under his sweatshirt to skim over his hips and stomach. "Besides, aren''t I a werewolf, now?" His eyes fluttered. It was very hard to concentrate with Louis''s hands doing that. "I''ll come up with an appropriate quip about full moons when you''re not distracting me."


    Louis chuckled deep in his chest and David gave him an exaggerated frown of disapproval before pulling him back down to kiss him again.


    Everything about kissing Louis was amazing. He was all heat and hard, demanding pressure against David. It was unexpectedly satisfying to be pressed between Louis and the car, too. David wondered, briefly, if they should move somewhere more private, but he couldn''t pull himself away long enough to voice the question. Next time Louis pulled back, David reasoned, he would ask him up to his room to keep making out.


    Just then, though, Louis''s stomach let out a growl. David gave a startled laugh against Louis''s lips, then had to break off the kiss as he was caught in a fit of giggles.


    ¡°Am I that tasty?" he asked, biting his lip.


    ¡°I forgot to eat dinner,¡± Louis said, shrugging nonchalantly, though David could see the slight flush across his cheeks. Cute.


    David snorted, then leaned in again to kiss him¡ªjust a quick one. Or one more, actually. Okay, this was the last one.


    David pulled back again, hands moving to rest on either side of Louis''s face, just so he could rub his thumbs over those flushed cheekbones.


    ¡°Pancakes?¡± David asked, unable to stop grinning.


    Louis sighed, but nodded, hunger seeming to override his scorn for breakfast foods.


    ¡°It''s not my fault there¡¯s only one 24-hour restaurant within a reasonable driving distance.¡±


    ¡°Pancakes are overrated,¡± Louis said.


    David scoffed, then made a whiny noise when Louis stood, pulling David to his feet.


    "Now it''s cold," he complained. Louis rolled his eyes, then took off his jacket and slung it around David.


    It was completely unnecessary but David put it on anyway, enjoying the smell of leather and Louis.


    "I''m wearing Crocs," David warned, scuffing one foot against Louis''s to draw the appropriate attention to the bright yellow Crocs he''d thrown on to get down here. "You sure you want to be seen in public with me?" He was also wearing sweats that were old enough to be relegated to pajama status.


    Louis raised a bemused eyebrow and shook his head. "Just get in the car, David," he said, giving him an affectionate shove.


    David laughed and climbed into the car.


    *****


    The Green Goose Diner was run by a man called Mac who never seemed to sleep¡ªperhaps he was a vampire. It was a tiny little trailer on the corner of two roads which both led to dead ends.


    David ordered a stack of pancakes that was almost as tall as him and Louis got an omelette¡ªhalf egg-whites¡ªbecause he had no sense of adventure.


    ¡°When do you go back to Weldstone Harbor?¡± Louis asked when they were half-way through their meal.


    David frowned, glancing down at his phone to check the date.


    ¡°The eleventh,¡± David said, feeling suddenly disappointed that he was going to be away from Louis for so long. They had just started this¡ªDating? Going out?¡ªafter all. How hard would it be to keep a long-distance relationship going when it was so new?


    Honestly, David wasn''t sure about any of the customs or expectations now that they were dating. Was he allowed to keep texting Louis in the middle of the night with every errant thought, or was there some protocol he should follow?


    Though Louis had told him to do whatever he wanted, there had to be some kind of balance. David wanted to know what Louis wanted, too. Especially since David thought that, even if he didn''t want exactly what Louis wanted, at least not in the same way, he might still want to try it.


    The last two days, David had come to realize that he absolutely did like kissing¡ªat least, he liked kissing Louis. A lot. And having Louis pressed up against him as they made out was also pleasant. Maybe it wasn''t really sexy like he''d always read about in books, but it had felt good and David still wanted more of it.


    What else might feel good? How far could he go for Louis? The idea was a little nerve-racking, but didn''t seem as out of the question as it had before, either.


    ¡°You only have a few days off,¡± Louis said, thoughtfully.


    It was true. David gave him a sullen shrug, a little put out that he wasn''t going to be here with Louis. He wanted to drag Louis along everywhere. Or, at least, wherever Louis would allow himself to be dragged.


    ¡°I¡¯ll be back once I¡¯m done filming, though,¡± David said.


    ¡°When¡¯s that?¡± Louis asked slowly, a speculative frown on his face. David was missing something. It sounded like Louis was trying to suss out if something was going to fit together, but David had no idea what.


    ¡°Uh, the eighteenth of next month,¡± David said. ¡°Filming ends on the sixteenth, but I wanted a couple days to go visit my parents.¡±


    ¡°Ah,¡± Louis said, then put his fork down to look at David. ¡°You said you¡¯ve been to The Rose and Thistle, right?¡±


    David nodded enthusiastically. ¡°Yeah, I live¡ªlived, rather¡ªa couple blocks down from it.¡±


    Louis nodded. ¡°Do you know Avery? They run the shop.¡±


    ¡°Yeah, not personally, but I know who they are,¡± David said. ¡°Rosemarie said you were friends.¡±


    The mention of his sister made Louis stiffen a little bit, though David couldn¡¯t think why. Since Louis was here, though, he decided it couldn¡¯t be anything too ominous.


    ¡°They''re marrying their partner, Eloise, on the twenty-fifth,¡± Louis said.


    David smiled. ¡°That¡¯s great!¡±


    Louis hummed in agreement, looking pleased. ¡°I¡¯ve been invited to attend the ceremony,¡± he said. ¡°And, if it doesn¡¯t conflict with your work schedule, I wondered if you would like to accompany me.¡±


    David¡¯s face heated. It seemed pretty intimate¡ªromantic, even¡ªto go to a wedding together. The feeling knotting in his stomach wasn¡¯t exactly unpleasant, though. ¡°Like as your date?¡±


    ¡°Yes, as my date,¡± Louis said, rolling his eyes. ¡°Unless you would rather keep this¡ª¡± he gestured between them, ¡°to ourselves.¡±


    David considered it, but, in the end, he didn''t mind everyone knowing that he was with Louis. A gleeful little part of him was actually pretty pleased by the prospect of it. He wanted to take Louis around town and brag about how amazing he was.


    ¡°I don¡¯t mind,¡± David said. ¡°But are you okay with that? I know you try to keep things quiet and that might be hard to do if we go together.¡±


    Louis shrugged. ¡°I am used to the attention. And I want you to go with me.¡±


    Warmth washed through him at that and David smiled a little. However used to the attention Louis was, he still clearly resented it. It meant a lot to David that he wanted to be seen with him, regardless of all that.


    ¡°Will you join me, then?¡± Louis asked, watching David intently like there was more than one possible answer.


    ¡°Of course!¡± David said, unable to contain the mushy smile on his face.


    ¡°What are you doing until you leave?¡± Louis asked, returning to his omelette.


    David snickered, watching Louis until his eyes turned warily up to him.


    ¡°Building a bookshelf with your sister!¡± he said.


    ¡°David.¡±


    ¡°I¡¯m serious!¡± David assured him.


    ¡°David.¡±


    ¡°No, really, you¡¯ll see,¡± he said. ¡°It¡¯ll be awesome."


    ¡°You¡¯re incorrigible.¡±


    David laughed and Louis leaned back in the booth, though his lips were quirked softly upward.

 Chapter Fifteen

    Being with David was different in a lot of ways.


    For as long as he had been dating, Louis had managed to avoid any deep attachments. He''d avoided the public eye and had never once brought a boyfriend to meet any of his other friends. He had managed to avoid any hint of scandal or impropriety and never engaged in public displays of affection.


    The same did not hold true for David.


    David liked to touch. Constantly.


    Since Louis arrived in Weldstone Harbor yesterday and met up with him, it seemed that that tendency had only become more pronounced.


    If David wasn''t putting a casual hand on Louis''s arm, he was intertwining their fingers. The selfish part of Louis wanted to enjoy the inherent physicality of being near David, but the other part of him worried about the optics of it. David''s career had already taken a beating due to his role in Lust Story and Louis was worried that word getting out that he was in a relationship with another man¡ªlet alone a relationship with Louis¡ªcould have a negative impact on him.


    Even if public opinion swayed in their favor, having so many eyes on you was... uncomfortable.


    Louis had lived this life since he was five. He was used to the attention he got, however invasive and unwelcome it was, but David didn¡¯t seem to give it much thought. Sometimes Louis wondered if he even noticed the looks they got when they walked down the street hand in hand.


    Not that they were necessarily recognized walking down the streets of Weldstone Harbor. It wasn¡¯t like they were in a small town anymore. There was anonymity in numbers and the queer population here was thriving. Louis wasn''t overly concerned given that there were regularly bigger stars wandering around the streets of Weldstone Harbor.


    Louis better judgement said he should be more discreet with David, maybe remind him of the impact on his career. But Louis didn''t want David to stop grabbing his hand, even in public. It might be selfish and a little possessive, but Louis wanted everyone to know that David was taken, that David was Louis''s.


    ¡°Are we going to The Rose and Thistle now?¡± David asked, one of his hands slipping into Louis''s back pocket as if he were on a leash.


    David had no concept of personal space, but that was all right with him.


    ¡°We can, if you want,¡± he said.


    "I want!"


    The two of them had spent the day wandering around on a sort of prolonged date, but they had yet to drop in on Avery. He was a little greedy after two weeks apart and half wanted to keep David for himself for a little longer, but it was probably time to share both David and his time with his other friends. He could at least bask in the closeness of David¡¯s arm to his as they started toward the book shop.


    The Rose and Thistle was small and tucked away between two much larger buildings that had popped up years after the establishment of the shop. Avadon Studios loomed over them from across the street, but the little bookstore had managed not only to survive the boom in Weldstone Harbor¡¯s entertainment industry but to thrive.


    The door beeped as they entered, announcing their presence to the shop staff¡ªnecessary, considering the floor to ceiling maze of shelves which made it impossible to see from one end of the store to the other. It gave the almost unsettling impression that the store went on forever.


    After a moment, Avery popped around the corner with their customer service smile on their face which quickly turned into a genuine smile.


    ¡°Well, if it isn¡¯t David!¡± Avery called. ¡°I thought you might have died when you stopped coming by.¡±


    Avery was on the short side with cool brown skin and a perpetually amused expression. Their hair was dyed in their customary shade of turquoise, but it was shorter than when Louis saw them last.


    ¡°I didn¡¯t die," David said with mock gravity, "I just found myself in a small mountain village with no way back."


    Avery nodded thoughtfully. ¡°Well, that¡¯s good to know. Were you kidnapped or did you decide to become a monk?¡±


    ¡°Neither, I just ended up with a job!¡±


    ¡°Holy shit!¡± Avery said. ¡°Congrats, dude! And, holy shit, is that Louis with you?¡±


    Avery blinked at them as though only just noticing his presence. He raised a sardonic eyebrow. "Ah, I see that you do still remember my name," Louis said dryly. "It''s good to see you, too."


    "I did not expect to find you two here together," Avery said, looking suspiciously between them. "It was a very strong moment of ''you appeared in the wrong context, so you don''t exist to me.''"


    "It''s the glasses, they have this whole Clark Kent effect," David said, reaching behind Louis''s ear to bounce Louis''s glasses to what Louis was sure he thought was great comedic effect. Louis swatted his hand away and Avery snorted.


    ¡°Nice to see you, Ave,¡± Louis said, leaning in for a hug.


    ¡°Still confused," Avery said, returning the hug, "but I''m sensing that you two are here together. How did that happen?¡±


    ¡°You don¡¯t watch much TV, do you?¡± Louis said.


    ¡°I¡¯m a book person, not a TV person,¡± Avery said, gesturing grandly to their surroundings and managing to knock their fist against one of the shelves.


    ¡°We met on set for that job I mentioned,¡± David explained. ¡°Found out that we both lived here. Or at least, we both did, except I moved out.¡±


    ¡°And he¡¯s now living in a bed and breakfast,¡± Louis said dryly.


    David shrugged, then grinned over at Avery. "I was promised lodgings by the monks, but it fell through. Besides," he continued more seriously, "I don¡¯t have a ton of stuff. I just sold the couch and bed and brought the rest with me.¡±


    Louis raised his brows. He knew David sold the apartment, he hadn¡¯t know that the only items David owned were the things that he brought with him. It suddenly made a lot more sense why David had an entire suitcase full of memorabilia and pictures in his little yellow room at the B&B. It was a little pathetic, really.


    ¡°Good to know you can so easily cut ties with us,¡± Avery said, though they were grinning.


    David shrugged. ¡°I¡¯ll send you book requests by mail order. It¡¯ll be like 84 Charing Cross Road.¡±


    Avery laughed, though Louis was unfamiliar with the reference. He couldn¡¯t help his eyes straying over David¡¯s face, anyway.


    ¡°So, are you here together, or are you here together?¡± Avery asked, watching Louis as he looked quickly away from David.


    ¡°Together,¡± David said, imitating Avery''s cadence.


    ¡°He¡¯s my plus one,¡± Louis confirmed. ¡°I did tell you I was bringing someone.¡±


    Avery nodded sagely. ¡°So you did. I didn¡¯t know it was David, though.¡±


    ¡°I didn¡¯t know you knew each other so well,¡± Louis pointed out.


    "I''d have given you an invitation in your own right," Avery said to David, "only, you disappeared to your mountaintop before the date was set."


    "Awe, sucks," David said, looking genuinely pleased. "I''ll remember to send the address of my next mountaintop."


    "Good," they said.


    ¡°Are you ready for the wedding?¡± Louis asked, removing his jacket and draping it over his arm as the heat of the store began to grow oppressive.


    Avery laughed. ¡°Don¡¯t say it like we¡¯re going to a funeral. If I didn¡¯t know better I¡¯d think you frowned upon the institution.¡±


    Louis just raised an eyebrow in response.


    ¡°I¡¯ll have to add that to my list of things that Louis does not approve of, right next to fuel inefficiency and cows,¡± David said the last with particular judgement.


    ¡°What¡¯s he got against cows?¡± Avery asked, then turned to Louis as though personally affronted. ¡°What did a cow ever do to you?¡±


    ¡°Exactly!¡± David said.


    ¡°Their mere presence is enough,¡± Louis said, getting a laugh out of David, though Avery took the slight more seriously. They spent the better part of an hour debating bovine merits before Avery was pulled away by a customer looking for a copy of Shadows of Earth. Louis not-so-subtly ducked behind a bookshelf until he¡¯d left, just in case.


    ¡°Hiding from your fans?¡± David asked, following him behind the shelf.


    ¡°Avoiding potential threats,¡± Louis said evenly. Now that they were here, though, he was starting to get other ideas. The isle between these particular shelves was fairly narrow.


    David chuckled, as though reading his mind, and stepped a little closer.


    ¡°We could always pretend to make out like they do in the movies.¡±


    Louis raised an eyebrow. "Only pretend?" he asked before leaning down to press a kiss to David¡¯s lips.


    If the man had been a fan of Starfly, the diversion seemed to have worked as he vaguely heard the sound of someone walking past them.


    ¡°When you two are finished browsing,¡± Avery said from the other side of the shelf, ¡°we can grab dinner. Lila-Marie is manning the counter now and offered to close up shop.¡±


    David sucked in a breath and pulled back with a little smirk.


    ¡°Sounds good,¡± Louis said, taking a step back.


    David¡¯s cheeks were a little pink but he didn¡¯t look at all repentant about being caught as they followed Avery to the Snapdragon Flagon. Louis decided to take that as a positive and even caught David¡¯s hand as they walked.


    Apparently, David was a bad influence on his sense of propriety.


    *****


    Though David considered Avery a friend, the two of them had never met up or even spoken outside of Avery''s work hours. To David''s delight, he found that their company was even better outside of work than it was while they were shuffling around the shelves of the Rose and Thistle.


    And having Louis there was an added bonus. David got to see a new side of Louis. He wasn''t like he was with Rosemarie, but neither was he like he was with colleagues. It was like seeing a younger version of him, playful and a little mischievous. He got it out of them that the two had met in college and bonded over theater classes then reconnected once Louis moved back from California.


    Avery''s fianc¨¦, Eloise, joined them, too. David liked her, too. She worked in video games and sucked David into a fascinating conversation about motion capture.


    The gathering lasted late into the night. By the time they bid their farewells, David was half asleep on his feet. Louis still had his condo here and did not have to stay at a hotel on the other side of the city like David. He was a little jealous, honestly.


    ¡°Do you want to stay over?¡± Louis offered when David whined about it.


    David¡¯s heart lurched and he glanced over at him. Louis continued walking, their hands still clasped sending warmth radiating through David. He considered it for a moment, chewing his lip.


    ¡°Don¡¯t you have to meet Avery for the rehearsal in the morning? I don¡¯t want to get in the way.¡±


    If you find this story on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the infringement.


    Louis hummed in the affirmative. ¡°I do, but you won''t be in the way. I don¡¯t have to leave until about ten, you could stay and we could grab breakfast in the morning before¡ª¡± Louis cut off, and gave a short shake of his head. He came to a stop and turned to David with a rueful smile. ¡°Sorry, I¡¯m being pushy," Louis said on a long exhale. "You don¡¯t have to stay over. I can call you a cab.¡±


    David¡¯s stomach fluttered with something between relief and disappointment. He hesitated. He wanted to spend the night with Louis, he just wasn''t ready to spend the night with Louis.


    Something in his expression must have revealed his misgivings because Louis just smiled and leaned in to give him a proper goodnight kiss. It wasn''t a heated kiss, nor was it chaste, it was just tender and lingering in a way that made David''s stomach flutter with something else entirely.


    "I''ll call you after the rehearsal, then," Louis said. He didn''t look disappointed, but his eyes lingered on David''s face for a moment longer than usual before he turned to wave down a cab.


    David caught his arm, then took Louis''s hand, giving it a little squeeze.


    ¡°No,¡± David said. ¡°I do want to go home with you.¡±


    Louis stared at him intently for a moment before his lips quirked into a smile. ¡°This way, then.¡±


    The two of them walked to Louis''s condo, which was only a little further than David''s apartment had been. David couldn''t quite believe that he had been living within ten blocks of Louis Greene and never knew it. Somehow, they hadn''t managed to run into each other until they both ended up in Midtown. David would have to thank Jennifer again for flying him out there.


    Louis''s condo was both nothing like David had imagined and exactly like David had imagined. It was a tiny, narrow flat with a shared yard and a garden full of aesthetic, but not particularly utilitarian flowers¡ªit was nothing like he pictured a movie star''s residence. Inside, though, it was very Louis. Everything was clean and precise and bathed in timeless shades of "neutral" and "muted" and "timeless".


    ¡°It¡¯s very you,¡± David said, nodding solemnly enough that Louis cuffed him lightly. ¡°I like the minimalism. It brings out the color.¡±


    Louis shrugged. ¡°I¡¯m not sentimental. I don''t collect things.¡±


    David pursed his lips disapprovingly. "Louis, where are the cute little knick knacks and trinkets? Did Rosemarie teach you nothing? Should I buy you a glass cow for your mantle piece?"


    ¡°I will throw it away."


    "You wouldn''t!" David said with mock affront.


    Louis raised an eyebrow.


    "No, look, it would match," David insisted. "Everything else in here is in black and white."


    Louis tried to glare, but his eyes were smiling. David snorted.


    "Really, though," he said. "Your place is nice. It does feel very you."


    "I''ll take that as a compliment."


    David nodded, swinging an arm around Louis''s shoulder. "You should."


    "Well, then, make yourself at home,¡± Louis said, gesturing around them. ¡°Kitchen is in here, bathroom is the door on the right, and there''s a full bath upstairs.¡±


    A giddy feeling pulsed through him as David realized that this was the first time he''d been in Louis''s home. Not just the place where Louis was living, not his sister''s home, but Louis''s home. A space that was really and truly Louis''s.


    David needed to explore.


    "Do you want anything to drink?" Louis asked.


    ¡°No, thanks." He dropped his arm from Louis''s shoulder and began snooping.


    The kitchen was a simple galley with a door beside the intimidatingly high tech fridge that presumably led to a pantry. Beneath the stairs was the promised bathroom. David peeked his head in only long enough to see that even the hand towel was white. He shook his head and gave Louis a disapproving look.


    "Don''t you know that bathrooms are supposed to be themed? Either by color or animal or superhero?"


    Louis leaned back against the kitchen counter, watching David investigate, looking amused. "I''ll be sure to acquire your professional input when it comes time to redecorate."


    David nodded, satisfied, then went to check out the living room. It wasn''t a big place, but everything was so perfectly suited to the space ti was in that David wondered if Louis had ordered custom furniture. He wouldn''t put it past him, really.


    The sofa was sleek and modern, leather or faux leather in a blue gray. There were no trinkets on the mantelpiece except for two identical bronze candle holders with two identical white candles¡ªwhich had never been lit.


    The only color in the place were a series of watercolor paintings on the walls. David examined each one of them, pointing out the places he recognized to Louis. They seemed to be a series of the coast around Weldstone Harbor. But even the watercolors held the same muted blues and cold grays of the rest of the condo.


    It all looked very stylish, neat, and modern. But it also looked a little lonely, at least to David. There was no life in it.


    For once, David thought he understood Rosemarie¡¯s fear of losing Louis once she was gone. The thought of it made a chill run down David¡¯s spine. He turned to see that Louis had followed him into the living room. He sat on the arm of the sofa, arms crossed over his chest as he watched David with dark eyes.


    David''s heart pounded.


    ¡°What?¡± David asked, voice soft and a little breathless.


    Louis uncrossed his arms and held a hand out to David. Despite his nerves, David couldn''t resist, coming immediately into Loui''s grasp. Louis''s smile was warm and pleased enough to outshine his nervousness as he came to a stop just between Louis''s knees.


    Louis looped his arms around David''s waist and pulled him a step closer, pressing his hands flat against his back. His nose burrowed into David''s stomach before he tilted his head up to smile at him. David''s breath hitched and his own hands ran over Louis''s shoulders to settle in his hair.


    "Nothing, really," Louis said and it took David a moment to remember what he''d asked. "I was just thinking about how much I missed you."


    David practically melted at that, bending to press a kiss to Louis''s forehead, then his lips.


    "I missed you, too," he admitted. ¡°Let¡¯s not do long distance again.¡±


    Louis laughed, though they both knew how unlikely that was. If they stayed together, their careers would doubtless take them in different directions and to different locations regularly.


    No matter how much David would like to stick to Louis 24/7, he didn¡¯t think he was any more qualified to be a house spouse than he was a construction worker. The thought was more upsetting that David might have expected.


    He didn¡¯t have long to ponder before Louis hooked a strong hand over the back of his shoulder, encouraging him to lean down for a kiss. David accepted gladly. Kissing from this position was different and he sort of liked the way he could control the angle of Louis''s head and set him off balance from his perch on the arm chair. Each time he pulled back out of Louis''s reach, Louis chased his mouth, but could do nothing but tighten his arms around Louis''s waist, fingers gripping at David''s back.


    "David," Louis said warningly when David had spent a little too long teasing him. David laughed and pressed a real kiss against his mouth, lips parting to let Louis''s tongue lick inside. Louis''s stubble rasped against his skin and his breath smelled like the coffee they''d drunk after dinner.


    David''s hands ran restlessly through Louis''s hair and over his shoulders, then skimmed down Louis''s back in a way that made Louis suck in a breath, back arching. David grinned into the kiss and did it again.


    "Ticklish?" he teased.


    ¡°David,¡± Louis said, clearly aiming for a flat affect but falling short as his voice turned breathless as David skimmed his fingers lightly over the back of his neck. He sucked in another breath, the sound sending a chill down David¡¯s spine, too. Louis''s hands slid to his sides, biting into David¡¯s ribs as he looked up at him in that way that made David feel like there was no possible way to be close enough to him.


    David kissed him again, harder this time, then pulled back just a little.


    ¡°I missed you,¡± David whispered against Louis''s lips. ¡°I really missed you. I didn¡¯t even know it was possible to miss someone that much.¡±


    Louis hands both wrapped up and over David''s shoulders, pulling him tighter against him and David leaned into the embrace, pressing their mouths together. He didn''t realize quite how much force he was exerting until, suddenly, Louis''s body was falling away from him. Louis gave a startled yelp, his grip on David bringing him tumbling down after him.


    As soon as David''s legs left the floor, his momentum upset the precarious balance Louis had managed to grasp at the edge of the couch and they began to shift. David had barely registered the wide-eyed surprise on Louis''s face before the two of them slid heavily off the couch, missing the coffee table by inches.


    Louis let out an oof as David landed on top of him once more, then groaned a little theatrically.


    David burst into laughter.


    "Are you all right?" he gasped when he''d finally stopped cackling long enough to leverage himself onto his elbows. As soon as he saw Louis''s disgruntled expression, though, he burst into laughter again and had to bury his face in Louis''s chest for a minute to calm down.


    "I''m lovely, thanks for asking," Louis said dryly.


    David nodded, still grinning then leaned into give him a quick peck. "You are," he agreed, "and so is this rug. From this vantage point, you can really see the shades of gray."


    "Shut up, David," Louis said.


    "Make me."


    Louis did, pulling David down on top of him before rolling them over in a rather impressive feat so that David was pinned to the floor, their bodies tangled tightly together. Louis wasted no time scraping a line over David''s jaw with his teeth before taking his mouth again.


    David''s hands roved up over Louis''s back, reveling in the way his muscles shifted as he moved. Louis''s weight on top of him was almost too much as he tried to catch his breath between kisses; he never wanted it to end.


    Louis shifted on top of him, one of his thighs pressing subtly between David''s legs and David was suddenly aware of the position they were in. His heart sped up in a not altogether pleasant way and he realized for the first time that Louis was hard against his hip. David''s brain seized up and he froze. As soon as he did, Louis pulled back, searching his face.


    "David?" Louis murmured, stroking a hand over his hair. "You all right?"


    It was hard to say at the moment. His heart was still hammering and he couldn''t seem to sort out his thoughts. He didn''t really want to stop what they''d been doing, but he didn''t really want to continue, either.


    Louis seemed to understand his inability to keep going, though, as he shifted himself up onto his knees so they weren''t pressed together anymore. "Let''s stop there," he said, pulling David to a seated position.


    David flushed, a little embarrassed about freezing up. He searched Louis''s eyes for any hint of resentment, but all Louis did was card a gentle hand through his hair.


    "Sorry," David mumbled. They were still practically touching and David had to resist a strong urge to bury his face in Louis''s chest so he couldn''t look at him, but then Louis pulled back further, giving them both some space.


    David wanted desperately to be able to clamber forward and continue with what they''d just been doing, but his body didn''t seem willing to obey. He reached up to scratch at the back of his neck and hating once again that he was like this.


    "David..." Louis trailed off, sounding almost at a loss for words.


    He didn''t want to string Louis along and he certainly didn''t want to push him away, but he didn''t know how to fix it, either. How long could Louis reasonably be expected to put up with that? Wasn''t the whole point to see if David could go through with it?


    Louis cleared his throat, visibly calming himself as he straightened his shirt. He met David''s eyes, though, and gave him a half-smile. "It''s all right, David. Really. We don''t have to do anything that you don''t want to." He reached out to run a hand through David''s hair again. "I meant it when I said I wanted to date you, not just have a one-night stand."


    ¡°Sorry,¡± David said again, despite Louis''s words.


    Louis shook his head, but didn''t say anything. Instead, he leaned in and pressed a soft little kiss just beside David''s eye. David practically melted and also felt about twice as guilty as soon as Louis pulled away.


    He watched from the floor as Louis climbed to his feet, then offered him a hand. David hesitated for a moment before taking it and allowing himself to be hauled up.


    "It''s getting late, anyway," Louis said, keeping his hold on David''s hand as he pulled them back to the kitchen and proceeded to pour a glass of water for David and then one for himself. The sheer normalcy of the action made David''s nerves start to settle, even if he felt a little like a child being sent to bed.


    "The bedroom is upstairs," Louis said. "I can sleep on the couch if you''d be more comfortable that way."


    David¡¯s stomach clenched with guilt and shame. He didn''t want to put Louis out like that. Besides, he didn''t really have a problem with sleeping with Louis. He just might have a problem sleeping with Louis.


    ¡°No,¡± David groaned. ¡°Don¡¯t do that. You don¡¯t have to give up your bed just because I got cold feet. I really am sorry. I know I was the one who said I wanted to stay over.¡±


    ¡°Stop saying that,¡± Louis said, looking extremely uncomfortable. His brows were drawn together and his mouth was pinched in a thin line. ¡°I told you, it¡¯s fine. You aren¡¯t obligated to sleep with me, you know, and you shouldn''t feel obligated to, either. That¡¯s not what I want and I¡¯m sure that¡¯s not what you want. We can take this slow. Don''t apologize for it.¡±


    David was sorely tempted to apologize again, so he bit his lips and nodded. Taking it slow was one thing, but what would Louis do if taking it slow meant never doing anything at all? A part of David really had wanted to try sleeping with Louis, but when it came down to it, he''d chickened out.


    ¡°Still,¡± David said after an awkward pause, ¡°I don¡¯t mind¡ª" He cut himself off with a shake of his head. "No, I want you to sleep with me. Uh, in the literal way.¡±


    Louis''s lips curled into a slow smile and he huffed a laugh before gesturing for David to follow him up to the bedroom.


    Despite his words, David was a little nervous as they got to the bedroom. He couldn''t even bring himself to tease him about the continued blue-gray quality of the d¨¦cor.


    Louis offered David a pair of pajama pants and he stripped down to change despite the flutter of unease in his chest. He might be uncomfortable with the idea of sex, but he had never been particularly shy. There was no sense in starting now.


    Louis followed suit, stripping down to change.


    David wondered if Louis usually wore pajamas or if he, too, slept in the buff. The thought made heat run to his cheeks, but he couldn¡¯t help but give Louis''s ass a speculative look as he pulled his pants up.


    Louis''s alarm clock, glasses case, and a small notebook that might have been a planner of some sort were on the bedside table on the right side of the bed, so David climbed in on the other side. Louis glanced at him with an almost tender look before he gestured over his shoulder, grabbing the glasses out of the case.


    ¡°I¡¯ll be back in a moment.¡±


    David gave a hesitant nod, then waited awkwardly for him to return. After a moment he mentally shook himself. This shouldn¡¯t have been an awkward situation. The two of them spent more time together lately than they did apart. Still, David¡¯s stomach fluttered as Louis came back through the door.


    ¡°Shall I turn off the lights?¡± he asked.


    He had obviously taken out his contacts and his ridiculously thick-framed glasses were perched on his nose. With his hair mussed from rolling around on the carpet, he looked very warm and comfy. David grinned at the thought, but only remembered to answer the question when Louis raised an inquisitive eyebrow.


    "Yeah," he said.


    David heard Louis walk over to the other side of the bed while his eyes adjusted to the dark. There was a soft clack of plastic as Louis folded his glasses and set them on the bedside table. The bed dipped and the covers rustled.


    David slid down in the bed, rolling reflexively onto his right side, only to realize that that put them face to face. David¡¯s heart pounded in his chest. He could make out the shape of Louis''s eyes watching him in the dark. David swallowed, suddenly all too aware of the sound of their breathing in the darkness.


    ¡°I can''t sleep with you staring at me," David whispered, then considered for a moment before continuing, "Roll over.¡±


    Louis frowned, but after a second¡¯s deliberation, he did as David asked and rolled onto his back. David nudged his shoulder until he''d rolled all the way over onto his other side. It was too dark to see, but David was sure he was rolling his eyes.


    Once he was situated, David shuffled closer on the bed until his chest was pressed to Louis''s back. Louis tensed a bit as David got settled, throwing an arm over Louis''s side and fidgeting until he found a comfortable place for his other arm while maintaining the maximum amount of contact between them. This was nice. He liked being close to Louis and he was a perfectly size body-pillow, too.


    After a moment, Louis relaxed back into David¡¯s embrace and that was even better. His hand covered David¡¯s, intertwining their fingers and rubbing a thumb softly over David¡¯s knuckle. David hummed his appreciation against Louis''s neck.


    ¡°Better?¡± Louis asked and David thought he heard amusement in his tone, but his eyes were already too heavy to pay much attention.


    ¡°Much,¡± David mumbled, already feeling the gentle pull of sleep.

 Chapter Sixteen

    Louis had only been to one wedding in his life and the only thing he remembered about it was how terrible the cake was.


    On principle, Louis was not a fan of the institution and he''d certainly never been expected to be a part of a wedding before. But for Avery, he was playing the role of best man, or something like it. The fact that it was a relatively small gathering with few people whom he did not know had done little to ease his nerves.


    As he waited at the door to his condo for David to finish getting ready, Louis carefully went over the rehearsal from the day before. It wasn''t going to be a particularly long or involved ceremony, but it was an important day for one of Louis''s closest friends. He did not want to make any mistakes.


    ¡°Ready to go?¡± David asked.


    Louis glanced up and was struck breathless. David walked down the stairs in a state of half-dress. He wore a burgundy tie and a crisp white shirt, but the cerulean jacket of his suit was draped over his arm as he tried to fasten the cuff link at his right wrist.


    ¡°Need some help?¡± Louis asked, stepping forward and taking the cufflink from David¡¯s hand. David smelled like soap and some cologne Louis was unfamiliar with, his skin still dewy and pink from the shower. David watched intently as Louis fastened it, his fingers lingering on David''s wrist a little longer than necessary.


    He took the jacket, then, and helped slide it up David''s arms, adjusting the collar and smoothing the lapels over his chest.


    ¡°Thanks,¡± David said with a half-grin. ¡°I don¡¯t wear monkey suits often, especially the kind that use cufflinks.¡±


    Louis hummed in appreciation, giving David a slow once-over. ¡°That¡¯s a shame.¡±


    The suit accentuated the broadness of his shoulders and the trim lines of his waist and hips. David might not dress up often, but he certainly knew how to do it when he did.


    David¡¯s cheeks flushed. ¡°Shut up,¡± he said, though he was smiling.


    Louis smirked and didn¡¯t resist the urge to reach out and guide David toward the car with a hand at the small of his back.


    The wedding took place at the Granite Botanical Gardens. The weather was picturesque, the sun dappling the grass through the leaves and glittering off the bride''s beaded gown. Avery looked dashing in a cherry-red suit and tie while Eloise was the picture of a bride down to the veil and lace train.


    Louis did his part as best man, but the entire time his attention kept drifting back to David. There was just something about seeing David in settings like this. Surrounded by people and festivity, David was in his element. It was like seeing him in his natural habitat. He conversed easily and openly with everyone about everything.


    As the ceremony turned to the reception, Louis drifted farther off to the side with a glass of celebratory champagne that he¡¯d only taken one sip out of. In a moment he was sure he would find himself dragged into some conversation or another with old schoolmates and acquaintances, but for now he was free to just watch as David chatted with one of Eloise¡¯s colleagues whom they¡¯d met briefly earlier.


    ¡°Enjoying the view?¡± Avery asked, coming up from behind to slap Louis hard enough on the back to make his drink slosh over the rim of the glass.


    ¡°Isn¡¯t it bad luck to spill the champagne or something?¡± Louis asked, turning a raised eyebrow at Avery. They just grinned at him.


    ¡°That¡¯s salt,¡± they said. ¡°You weren¡¯t drinking it anyway.¡±


    ¡°True,¡± Louis said. He was only holding it so he looked like he was doing something instead of just pining after David from across the garden.


    ¡°I repeat: Enjoying the view?¡± Avery said.


    Apparently, it had been an unsuccessful ploy.


    ¡°Just wondering how he can always be so energetic,¡± Louis hedged.


    Avery snorted. ¡°Sure,¡± they said. ¡°I¡¯m pretty sure you¡¯re going to burn a hole in that suit if you keep looking at him like that.¡±


    Louis gave them a reproachful look that Avery just laughed off.


    ¡°How long have you two been together, anyway?¡± Avery asked more seriously, looking Louis over speculatively.


    ¡°Not long,¡± Louis admitted with a shrug. ¡°Under a year.¡± Though it seemed like much, much longer.


    ¡°Well, you know what they say, when you find the right person, it only takes a second to fall for them. It was the same for me with El.¡±


    Louis looked over at Avery, surprised. He hadn''t realized he was that transparent. There was no denying that he had feelings for David, maybe stronger feelings than he should at this stage, but he hadn''t realized anyone else could see it.


    The thought had him glancing over at David again who happened to catch his eye and wave. Before Louis could come up with a response to Avery, David was making his way over to them.


    ¡°Congratulations to you and Eloise,¡± David said, giving Avery a companionable hug. Avery clapped him on the shoulder and thanked him before excusing themself to go find their bride again.


    ¡°They look happy,¡± David said as he took the last sip of his champagne. Louis silently offered him his own glass and David took it with a small smile.


    ¡°That''s a relief," Louis said dryly. "They just got married, after all. If they weren¡¯t happy, this whole ceremony would have been a waste of time.¡±


    David bumped their shoulders together. ¡°That¡¯s not what I mean. I mean that they look like they are really in love.¡±


    ¡°As opposed to faking it?¡± Louis asked just to be obnoxious.


    David chuckled, taking a sip of Louis''s champagne. ¡°Yeah, they seem like the kind of people who will be in love forever. It''s nice.¡±


    Louis hummed in agreement. He recognized the same. They were the kind of people who just fit, like their lives and persons were made to slot together seamlessly. They watched for a moment as Avery and Eloise began the dancing at the center of the garden.


    On the second song, a few more couples joined the newlyweds on the floor. David swayed a little to the beat of the music, transferring his champagne to the other hand so that he could slip an arm around Louis''s shoulders. They watched the dancing and Louis found himself reaching around to settle his own hand at David''s waist, giving a quick squeeze.


    After a moment¡¯s thought, Louis slipped out from under David''s arm and took the nearly empty champagne flute from David¡¯s hand. He set it on a nearby table. David gave him a questioning look until Louis reached out a hand to him.


    Unauthorized duplication: this narrative has been taken without consent. Report sightings.


    ¡°Dance with me?¡± he asked. It was surprisingly nerve-racking. They were already dating, but the potential for rejection still made Louis''s heart thunder.


    David certainly looked surprised enough to refuse. He glanced down at Louis''s extended hand and swallowed.


    ¡°I¡¯m not sure¡ª¡± David stammered, cheeks pink. ¡°I haven¡¯t ever danced with¡ªI mean, I don¡¯t know how to follow, so... I¡¯m not even sure what I¡¯m trying to say.¡± David ducked his head with a nervous laugh.


    Louis chuckled, extending his hand more firmly toward David. ¡°You can lead, if that¡¯s what you¡¯re worried about.¡±


    David hesitated for only a second longer, biting his lip before giving in with a laugh and taking Louis''s hand.


    "Don''t regret it if you end up with scuffed shoes," he said before pulling Louis into hold.


    David wasn¡¯t the most elegant partner that Louis had danced with and Louis wasn¡¯t used to following, so he nearly stumbled a couple times, too, but David led them through a passable waltz and a foxtrot before the music changed and the dancing turned into something more like elaborate swaying and freestyling.


    Miraculously, Louis found that he didn¡¯t even care that this was a social gathering or that they were surrounded by other people and probably looking ridiculous as they spun around together. Louis did not stop smiling the entire time.


    Pressed up against David with the sound of crickets welcoming the night, Louis would have been content for this moment to last forever.


    For the first time in Louis didn¡¯t know how long, he felt happy. Not just the fleeting joy of amusement, but truly and contentedly happy.


    *****


    David loved weddings.


    Maybe he was just a sap, but he loved the promise of forever and the pure bliss on the faces of the newlyweds and their loved ones. Everyone was caught in the moment, as though this instant of happiness could last an eternity. It was a heady feeling and the closest to happily ever after that David thought it was possible to get.


    This wedding was the best one he''d ever attended. Not just because he was happy for Avery and Eloise, but because he was here with Louis. Louis always made David¡¯s day that much better. Being here with Louis made David wonder about things that he hadn¡¯t let himself wonder about in a long time.


    For the first time in years, David wondered whether something like this might be in the cards for him, too. He was probably getting ahead of himself, but as he danced with Louis, David let himself wonder if maybe he and Louis might have this in their future.


    The thought was both terrifying and exhilarating. Maybe David was expecting too much. After all, he and Louis were still figuring things out. Neither of them had promised anything more than giving it a try.


    But, sometimes, the way Louis looked at him made David wonder if there could be something more between them, too.


    It came as something of a surprise that David thought he wanted whatever more Louis had in mind. The longer he was around Louis and the more liberties Louis allowed him to take, the more David wanted from him.


    If he was honest with himself, David suspected that his feelings for Louis ran deeper than he''d thought. When he saw Louis with Avery, David recognized with a flash of surprise that he was jealous. Not because he thought there was anything romantic between them, but because Avery had known Louis for years and David envied them that. He wanted to know everything there was to know about Louis. He wanted to be the one he shared his thoughts and feelings with, the one he shared himself with. Completely.


    And David was starting to think he might want to share all of himself with Louis, too.


    The dancing began to peter out after a time and David and Louis drifted over to the side, neither of them really leading anymore as they swayed around, and finally came to a stop. David could have danced all night, but it was nice being alone with Louis, too.


    He was gratified that Louis didn''t drop his arms from where they''d settled at the back of his neck and against his shoulder. David had no intention of letting go of his grip on Louis''s hips, though he slid his arms more comfortably around him, turning the hold into a loose embrace.


    Louis''s eyes sparkled with warmth and David wondered if it was inappropriate to make out with his boyfriend at someone else''s wedding.


    ¡°Any plans for the rest of the night?¡± Louis asked in a way that could definitely be construed as an invitation.


    David smiled a little, shuffling closer.


    ¡°Nothing in particular,¡± David said. The lights in the garden twinkled behind Louis, shining off his dark hair like some sort of halo.


    Weddings definitely made David a sap.


    David¡¯s eyes wandered over those strong brows, following the bridge of his nose down to his lips. When he looked back up, Louis was watching him with an intense expression. David leaned in a little, remembering the night before and wondering why he had pushed him away. Maybe it was the lights or maybe the champagne making him brave, but David wanted... well, Louis.


    Louis''s fingers scratched idly at the back of Louis''s neck. ¡°Then, would you like to stay over again? Just like last night. It doesn¡¯t have to be anything more than that.¡±


    David stared into Louis''s eyes for a moment before giving a shaky nod. Louis''s lips quirked and David leaned forward, unable to resist any longer. His arms tightened around Louis''s waist and Louis''s eyes darkened. David tilted his head up, but a loud ring made David jump and pull back again.


    Louis grimaced as David laughed, taking a step back so Louis could pull his the offending phone from his pocket. As soon as he read the caller ID, though, his expression shifted to something like worry. Hollow dread welled in the pit of David''s stomach.


    ¡°This is Louis Greene.¡± His voice professional and even, but his expression was wooden. David¡¯s heart thundered as his mind ran rampant with scenarios. There was a moment of silence before Louis''s face drained of color. ¡°When?¡± Louis nodded to himself, his hand coming up to grip David¡¯s elbow in a way that made David tense along with him. ¡°Yes,¡± Louis continued into the phone. ¡°Thank you.¡±


    ¡°What¡¯s wrong?¡± David demanded, his heart feeling like it might have stopped entirely.


    Louis shook his head, then pressed a button on speed-dial.


    ¡°Anthony, it¡¯s Louis. Rosemarie¡¯s in the hospital and I need a ticket to Midtown tonight,¡± he said.


    David¡¯s stomach dropped to his feet and he instantly reached up to grip Louis''s wrist where it still rested on his elbow. That drew Louis''s attention as he said a few more words to his agent before hanging up.


    There was a moment of silence during which their gazes met and David saw a chilling blankness in the usually warm brown of Louis''s eyes. Louis''s hand trembled and David gripped his wrist more tightly, pulling his elbow free so that he could clasp Louis''s hand in both of his own.


    ¡°What happened?¡± David asked, trying to keep his voice calm.


    Louis gave a tight shake of his head.


    ¡°I don¡¯t know. She¡¯s in the hospital and my plane leaves in 30 minutes and I need to pack.¡±


    He pulled his hand from David''s grip, but David caught his arm as he turned away. David held out his other hand out, a wave of calm overwhelming the adrenaline spike. ¡°Give me your keys. I¡¯ll drop you at the airport and then go by your apartment. I can bring your things back with me.¡±


    Louis hesitated for only a second before handing David the keys. He sent a quick text to Avery as they dashed toward the car. David didn¡¯t miss the tightness of his jaw as they climbed in or the way his fingers turned white against his knees.


    ¡°I¡¯ll be right behind you,¡± David said as they stopped outside the Weldstone Harbor International Airport. He wanted to tell Louis that everything was going to be all right, but the dark voice inside his head reminded him that it really wouldn¡¯t be. For Rosemarie, there was no all right there was just a little longer.


    ¡°Thank you,¡± Louis said, giving David¡¯s hand a bone-crushing squeeze before leaving for the gate at a run.


    David waited until Louis''s back was gone from view before driving slowly back to Louis''s condo.


    He parked the car, turned the key in the ignition, then had a small mental breakdown. This night had started out so magical and now David had no idea what to do about anything. Only 24 hours ago, he and Louis had been pressed together in his living room, so close that David could feel every beat of Louis''s heart. Now, it was as though the world had fallen through, like wet tissue paper trying to hold up something far too heavy.


    David called Jennifer.


    ¡°If you want sex advice, call a therapist,¡± Jennifer said when she picked up. ¡°I don¡¯t have time for that.¡±


    ¡°Jennifer¡ª¡± David said, then wasn¡¯t sure where to go from there.


    ¡°What¡¯s wrong?¡± she asked immediately.


    David could almost see her dropping everything to come to his rescue like a knight in shining armor.


    ¡°Louis is on a plane back to Midtown. His sister is in the hospital and I don¡¯t know what to do.¡±


    ¡°Shit. All right. First, take a deep breath, Davie. Where are you?"


    "Weldstone Harbor, I''m sitting in front of Louis''s condo. I''m bringing his things back to Midtown for him."


    "All right," Jennifer said. "Go pack, then. I''ll start looking at flights. What about your things? Were you staying with Louis?"


    "No, I''m in a hotel. I''ll stop there after," David said, mentally creating a checklist of tasks so he didn¡¯t have to think about anything else.


    If Rosemarie died while they weren''t there, while Louis wasn''t by her side, David didn''t know what he''d do. It would destroy Louis not to be there for her, not to have every last second with her. His heart ached for both of them and his eyes stung.


    David took a calming breath and got out of the car to go pack up Louis''s belongings.

 Chapter Seventeen

    The two-hour plane ride back to Midtown was the longest two hours of Louis''s life. When they finally touched down, Louis was grateful that he had no baggage to collect and sprinted from the terminal. He was in such a rush that he nearly didn''t recognize the bright orange Mustang parked right beneath the arrivals sign. He did a double take and Jennifer Yang beckoned to him.


    ¡°David called,¡± she said simply as Louis approached. Louis just nodded, not trusting his voice as he climbed into her car. He owed David. And Jennifer. ¡°Which hospital?¡±


    Louis glanced over at her then gave the address. It was the closest hospital to Midtown, but perhaps most people weren¡¯t as familiar with the locations of hospitals as Louis had come to be.


    They drove in complete silence, for which Louis was grateful. He was already sick to his stomach with worry. She was still alive¡ªstable, they''d said¡ªbut Louis didn¡¯t know for how much longer.


    Jennifer pulled up to the main entrance and let him out, saying something about going back to meet David whenever he arrived. Louis didn¡¯t wait for her to finish the thought before he was out the door with a hurried thank you and sprinting toward the hospital.


    He went directly up to the cancer ward. None of the usual nurses were there, but just as he approached the nurse¡¯s station, Dr. Vasquez came in through a set of wide doors where the single-rooms for the critically ill patients were located.


    Rosemarie had never yet been admitted to those rooms¡ªrooms which Louis''s mind always termed the death rooms¡ªbut seeing Rosemarie¡¯s doctor walk through those doors still made Louis''s heart stop.


    ¡°Dr. Vasquez,¡± Louis called, unable to make his feet move toward those doors. Juana Vasquez was a petite woman in her mid-fifties with corkscrew curls and a warm disposition. She was exactly the kind of doctor that Rosemarie needed and the kind that Louis typically avoided. Right now, though, Louis didn¡¯t think he had ever been happier to see her.


    ¡°Mr. Greene,¡± Vasquez said, approaching him with swift clacking of her practical flats. Louis opened his mouth to ask about Rosemarie, but she was already speaking. ¡°Rosemarie is stable and there¡¯s nothing immediate to worry about. She had a bit of a scare when she collapsed at the grocery store. She''s on fluids and we''ll keep her for observation tonight.¡±


    Louis''s heart thundered in his chest. She had collapsed. She had collapsed while doing something as menial as grocery shopping. The idea that she might not be well enough to continue such normal routines twisted Louis''s gut in knots.


    He never should have left for Weldstone Harbor. What was he thinking? Rosemarie was sick. What would he do if this was the last time he saw her? Why hadn¡¯t he thought of that before he left?


    Dr. Vasquez said a few more words but Louis wasn¡¯t listening. After a moment, she gestured for him to follow her to Rosemarie¡ªthankfully, in the opposite direction of the palliative care units.


    Louis wasn¡¯t sure what he was expecting as they made their way toward the doors. Rosemarie was stable, she¡¯d said, but what did that mean, exactly?


    He braced himself as he entered the room. But Rosemarie looked very much like she had the day he left for Weldstone Harbor.


    Asleep on the crisp white and teal bed, she looked like she did any other night aside from the IV at her wrist. Louis breathed a sigh of relief at the slow rise and fall of her chest and the comforting blip of her heart rate on the monitor.


    ¡°You can stay with her as long as you¡¯d like. The nurses will be in and out throughout the night,¡± Dr. Vasquez said.


    ¡°Thank you, Doctor,¡± Louis managed before collapsing into the chair beside her bed. He took her free hand in both of his and pressed a gentle kiss to it without waking her.


    Rationally, he had known that this was coming, but it still felt like he''d been blindsided by it.


    Rosemarie was in the hospital...


    And Louis hadn¡¯t been there for her.


    He had been in another state, too far away to rush to the hospital, too far away to be here with her until the emergency was over. Guilt gnawed at him even as he felt frozen by the idea of being here to see it happen.


    He didn¡¯t want to see her die.


    He wanted to run away and hide from it, even though he knew that wouldn¡¯t make it any less permanent.


    He just didn¡¯t want to see her die.


    And even as he felt guilt over the idea of leaving her alone like that, he couldn¡¯t stop the desire.


    He didn¡¯t want her to die....


    Louis dropped his head down to the bed beside their hands and closed his eyes.


    He must have drifted off at some point because when he opened his eyes again, Rosemarie was watching him, her hand threading through his hair in a gentle caress. Louis cleared his throat of sleep and straightened up.


    ¡°Your phone was ringing,¡± she said.


    ¡°Sorry, I thought it was on silent.¡±


    Rosemarie chuckled. "I was up anyway. They¡¯re rather persistent, though. You might want to¡ª" her words were cut off by a new ring.


    Louis pulled his phone from his coat pocket and glanced at the caller ID. It was David. David was both the first and last person he wanted to talk to right now. His hand hesitated for a second before declining the call and shooting off a quick text of, At the hospital with Rosemarie. I¡¯ll call you later.


    ¡°It¡¯s just David,¡± Louis said. ¡°I¡¯ll call him back.¡±


    Rosemarie gave him a skeptical look but didn¡¯t fight him on it.


    Now that she was awake, she looked tired and maybe a little scared, too. Louis chewed his lip trying to decide what to say. He wanted to apologize for not being there but he knew Rosemarie would brush it off like she always did. Instead, he should probably tell her to get some sleep.


    ¡°You look tired,¡± Rosemarie said, taking the words right out of his mouth.


    ¡°You¡¯re one to talk,¡± he said, tone only just pulling off teasing. ¡°What happened?¡± he asked when he couldn¡¯t hold it back any longer.


    ¡°Just the nature of the beast,¡± she said softly. ¡°I¡¯m not too clear on the details myself. The last thing I remember was feeling dizzy at the grocery store and then I was waking up here.¡±


    ¡°I should have been here,¡± Louis said softly, gripping her hand in his. Rosemarie shook her head.


    ¡°It¡¯s not the first time I¡¯ve fainted, Lou,¡± she reminded. ¡°And the only reason I¡¯m here is because someone at the store called an ambulance. Don¡¯t make a fuss.¡±


    Louis wanted to protest, to tell her that it clearly was different since they were keeping her here for observation, but for now he was too emotionally drained to argue. He wished that he could pretend that everything was fine, but it wasn¡¯t. This was just the beginning and the thought of what came at the end made Louis feel like he was standing at the edge of the abyss.


    ¡°Lou,¡± Rosemarie said, bringing him back to the present. ¡°None of that. I can tell what you are thinking and I want none of it.¡± Despite her harsh words, she ran a hand through his hair. Louis rolled his eyes, doing his best to play along.


    ¡°Do you need anything?¡± he asked.


    Rosemarie¡¯s lips quirked. ¡°Sleep. Which you clearly need, too.¡±


    ¡°Sorry, I didn¡¯t mean to keep you up. You should sleep. I¡¯ll just¡ª¡±


    ¡°I will sleep once you go home. I¡¯ll be discharged tomorrow and you should get some real sleep in a real bed and then you can bring the car over tomorrow.¡±


    ¡°Rosemarie,¡± Louis started.


    She cut him off with a look.


    ¡°Lou,¡± she said, ¡°I will not be able to sleep with you here. I will worry about you all night, so please, for both of our sakes, go home. Get some proper sleep and then bring my blue dress for when I¡¯m discharged tomorrow. Everything¡¯s going to be all right.¡±


    Louis let out a long breath. Leaving was the last thing he wanted to do right now, but he knew, too, that sometimes Rosemarie really did need to be alone. Sometimes, she needed to not have to be strong for Louis.


    Louis knew that and he hated it.


    He wished that she could let him in and share her pain with him, let him be there for her no matter what her feelings were on all of this. He wished that he knew how to tell her that he was here and that he knew she was hurting, too, and that she didn''t need to spare his feelings.


    But there were some things that they had never really shared. If she couldn¡¯t share this with him, he could force himself to leave. He could give her the space she needed to process it without worrying about how he felt.


    "Do you really want to be alone?" Louis asked, voice quiet.


    "I''m sorry," Rosemarie said, looking down. She gave his hand a squeeze. Louis swallowed hard and nodded.


    ¡°I love you,¡± he said, standing enough that he could lean over and give her a tight hug and a kiss on the side of her head.


    ¡°I love you, too. More than you will ever know,¡± she said, rubbing a hand over his ribs. ¡°Now go get some sleep. I¡¯ll see you tomorrow.¡±


    Logically, there was no reason to think otherwise, but walking out of the hospital room was still the hardest thing he had ever done. He made it all the way to the first floor before realizing that he didn¡¯t have his car. In fact, he probably didn¡¯t even have his keys. He didn¡¯t think that he had had the presence of mind back in Weldstone Harbor to separate his Midtown keys from his condo keys before he left.


    He was just pulling out his phone to call a cab when the elevator doors opened to reveal David who looked almost as surprised to see him as Louis was to see David.


    Louis silently put the phone back in his pocket.


    Louis didn¡¯t know what to say as he stepped out of the elevator. His mind wouldn¡¯t stop whirring. She was stable. She was stable and they were keeping an eye on her. Everything would be fine. Tonight, at least, everything would be fine.


    He wanted to stay with her, to hold her hand all night and be sure she was still breathing. But at the same time, he didn''t know if he could. Even if she hadn¡¯t banished him, he wasn''t sure he was strong enough to sit there watching her lie there so still and quiet in that bed.


    It felt too much like foreshadowing.


    ¡°Louis,¡± David said softly and Louis realized that David still had no idea what was going on. He looked pale and nearly as worried as Louis had been. Louis let out a breath.


    ¡°She¡¯s stable. They''re just keeping her overnight,¡± he said. ¡°I¡ª¡± Louis shook his head. He didn¡¯t know where to go with that thought. All he could think was that he needed to get back to the house, get Rosemarie¡¯s dress and then find a hotel or something nearby.


    He should stay close to the hospital. Just in case. But part of him really didn¡¯t want to be there to see it happen. Even though she seemed like she was all right for tonight.


    He didn¡¯t know what the hell he was going to do if tonight was the night.


    If she died¡ªwhen she died¡ªLouis thought he just might lose his mind.


    ¡°Louis? Louis!¡± David¡¯s voice brought him out of his thoughts again. He didn¡¯t know why he felt so tired all of a sudden.


    "What are you doing here?" Louis asked, voice raw.


    David''s hands came up to grip his arms, giving them a reassuring squeeze. "I have your keys," he said. "So I brought your car. I hope you don''t mind...."


    ¡°Good. Let¡¯s get out of here,¡± he said, grabbing David¡¯s hand and pulling him back out of the hospital. He didn¡¯t know where David had parked, so he let David take the lead, though he confiscated the keys for himself.


    David hesitated before climbing in the passenger side of the car. He looked about as lost as Louis felt. As Louis pulled out onto the road heading back toward the Midtown B&B, David reached over and gave his shoulder a quick squeeze. It was over in an instant, but Louis was more grateful for that small comfort than he had words to describe.


    ¡°She''s not in danger. They¡¯re keeping her overnight,¡± Louis said, reminding himself as much as trying to fill David in. ¡°She should be discharged in the morning.¡±


    David let out a relieved sigh. ¡°That¡¯s good. I can¡¯t imagine she likes being stuck there.¡±


    Louis gave a short shake of his head. ¡°She ordered me to go home.¡±


    David nodded as though this made perfect sense, though none of this made any sense.


    ¡°Do you want company?¡± David asked slowly.


    Louis thought for a moment. Part of him wanted to ask David to stay, but the other part of him couldn¡¯t stand the idea of having David here right now. Not when he felt so raw, so vulnerable. David was a good friend, his closest friend, and right now they were playing at something else, but Louis still shied away from the idea of David seeing him¡ªseeing all the hurt and fear in his mind.


    ¡°I¡¯ll drop you off at the B&B,¡± Louis said. It wasn¡¯t an answer to the question. If it was, it would have been a lie, but it was the best Louis could do.


    Louis could see David watching him out of the corner of his eye, but he didn¡¯t push the issue. Louis was only half relieved about that.


    As they drove, Louis both dreaded and anticipated David¡¯s departure. Like Rosemarie, sometimes he just needed to be alone¡ªto think through things and sort out his feelings. Sometimes, he wished someone would tell him that they weren''t leaving him alone, even if he wanted them to. It didn''t make sense, but, then, nothing about this night made sense. He wanted to be everywhere and nowhere at all. And, most of all, he wanted to stop thinking. He wanted all of this to be over, even though he knew what it would mean for it to end.


    When he pulled into the parking lot of the B&B, David hesitated. There was a long moment during which Louis couldn¡¯t quite bring himself to ask David to stay after all and during which David did not offer again.


    ¡°Take care of yourself, Lou,¡± David said. His voice was soft, but it echoed in the silence of the night.


    Louis gave a tight nod and David squeezed his shoulder again before getting out of the car. Louis watched until David disappeared through the door before letting out a shaky breath, his forehead coming to rest against the steering wheel.


    Everything was falling apart.


    Stolen story; please report.


    He forced a breath into protesting lungs. All he had to do was get through tonight.


    Tomorrow, he¡¯d go pick Rosemarie up from the hospital and everything would be all right again. Only... things wouldn¡¯t be all right again. Whether it was tonight or a year from now, Louis knew that there was a limit to all right.


    Louis hands gripped the steering wheel tighter and he squeezed his eyes shut, warring with himself.


    He didn¡¯t want to be alone, but he desperately didn¡¯t want to be with anyone else, either.


    It wasn¡¯t until he heard David¡¯s muffled voice and a sharp rap on the window that he realized David had come back. He pried his hand from the steering wheel long enough to unlock the door. His whole body was stiff as he unbuckled his seatbelt. David flung open the door before he could and practically dragged him out of the car and into his arms. Louis''s arms came up around David almost instinctively.


    ¡°Fuck. I don¡¯t know how to help, Lou,¡± David said, pressing his face into Louis''s neck. ¡°But I can¡¯t just leave you alone. I don¡¯t know what else to do.¡±


    ¡°She¡¯s all right,¡± Louis said, though he wasn¡¯t sure if he was trying to remind David or himself. ¡°She¡¯s stable.¡± His hands were shaking. Louis gripped the back of David¡¯s shirt even tighter, trying to get the trembling to stop.


    ¡°Yeah, I know,¡± David breathed. ¡°She¡¯s stable. I¡¯m still freaking out, though, and it must be even worse for you.¡±


    Those words were somehow exactly what Louis needed to hear and he let out a shuddering breath. Louis could feel the pounding of David¡¯s heart against his chest, he counted the beats, trying to distract himself from the cycle of she¡¯s dying, she¡¯s dying, she¡¯s dying, oh, God, she¡¯s dying, that wouldn¡¯t leave his head.


    David¡¯s skin smelled stale and musty, but Louis needed more. His arms tightened around David, pressing him back against the car. Louis could barely contain himself as he pressed his lips to David''s jaw, then to his mouth, hands gripping David''s head and waist tight enough to bruise. He bit at David''s lip, wanting all of him so desperately it was almost frightening.


    David didn¡¯t protest, simply matched him, kiss for kiss, bite for bite, groaning encouragingly into his mouth as Louis pressed his whole weight against him.


    ¡°I want you,¡± Louis whispered against David''s ear, his hand cradling the back of David''s neck. The words felt raw, like a broken secret against David''s neck. "I want you so badly."


    "Louis," David gasped, breathless. His body writhed against Louis and Louis couldn''t hold back the groan that escaped him. His knee found its way between David''s legs and David''s hips jerked.


    Louis bit down on the lobe of David¡¯s ear and felt the shiver run through David¡¯s body. This was a bad idea. It was too fast, too sudden. But right now he just didn¡¯t care. He needed someone.


    He needed David.


    ¡°Louis, come upstairs,¡± David said, breathlessly. "Stay with me."


    *****


    The entire drive back, Louis''s face had been pale and he wore an expression that made David¡¯s chest ache. He didn''t want to leave Louis alone, but he knew Louis didn''t always appreciate company. Still, it had used all his willpower to leave the car.


    By the time he reached the stairs, hand hesitating on the banister, David realized he couldn''t do it. He hadn¡¯t even considered that Louis might have left already before he had turned around and sprinted back into the parking lot.


    When he saw Louis hunched over the steering wheel, David knew that he couldn¡¯t leave him alone. Not now, or ever. He¡¯d opened the door and pulled Louis against him without thinking. All he knew was that he needed to be close to Louis and Louis had seemed to need that, too.


    So, when he¡¯d said, ¡°I want you,¡± David had no desire to deny him.


    Louis mouth was hot and hard and demanding. Branding his claim against David''s skin.


    ¡°Upstairs,¡± David prompted again before he lost all sense. He wasn''t even sure if they closed the car door as he dragged Louis up to his room. He fumbled for his keys while Louis''s arms wrapped possessively around his waist, his chest pressed up against David''s back. David swore softly when he dropped them on the floor. He bent awkwardly to pick them up, Louis''s hands refusing to release him for even that long.


    David barely managed to unlock the door before Louis was on him again, his hands on either side of David''s face, pulling him in for a devouring kiss. David''s palms smoothed over Louis''s chest and stomach. He''d left his suit jacket somewhere and the silk of his shirt sent electricity through David''s fingers as his hands explored Louis''s body.


    It wasn''t enough, so David tugged at Louis''s shirt until it came free from his pants, his hands immediately diving beneath them to squeeze at his hips and sides, pulling him in closer. Louis''s skin felt amazing¡ªhot and smooth against his hands, and the thick covering of hair over his stomach.


    Louis''s hands dropped from David''s face and he pulled back just enough to pull his tie loose and start neatly unfastening the buttons of his shirt. That was a good idea. David knocked Louis''s hands away to undo the buttons himself, fumbling as Louis tugged him out of his own jacket and tie.


    "You look incredible in a suit," Louis said, pressing their foreheads together. "I''ve been thinking about taking it off of you since this morning."


    David laughed and pressed a kiss to the side of Louis''s mouth. "I look so good in it that you wanted it off of me?"


    "Yes." Louis''s tone sent a shiver down David''s spine and that craving for closeness strengthened in his belly. His fingers clumsily unfastened the remaining buttons, then started pushing the shirt off of his shoulders.


    "Cuffs," Louis reminded him, laughter rumbling in his chest.


    David rolled his eyes, ears heating a little. "Why do you wear things with so many buttons?" he grumbled, but took Louis''s hands and unfastened the cufflinks, pulling away from him just long enough to drop them and David''s own cufflinks, on the table by the TV remote.


    When he turned back, Louis had stripped the rest of the way out of his shirt. David''s breath caught in his chest and his heart hammered with nervous anticipation.


    Louis held out a hand and David stepped back into his embrace, just close enough to touch. Louis let him take his time, hands settling agreeably but undemanding on David''s shoulders and arms. David''s eyes and hands roved over the ridges of Louis''s chest.


    God, he was gorgeous.


    His skin was pale and smooth, though there was a generous sprinkling of hair over his chest and stomach. David had the sudden impulse to lean down and bite one of those pink nipples. A little embarrassed by the prospect, though, David contented himself with running his hands up and down his chest and sides.


    "I¡ª" David started, voice catching in his throat. "Louis¡ª" he tried again, but didn''t know where to take the sentence. Instead, he pulled his hands back from Louis''s chest and began unbuttoning his own shirt. Louis watched with hooded eyes as David removed his shirt.


    He felt strangely shy about it, despite the fact that he''d shown more skin to more people on many occasions. He swallowed hard as he dropped the shirt on the floor, face and chest feeling flushed under Louis''s gaze.


    In what was possibly the sexiest move in the history of sexy moves, Louis hooked a hand into David''s belt and reeled him in for another kiss. David groaned into the kiss, his shyness forgotten as they pressed together, skin against skin.


    David''s hands fumbled for Louis''s belt buckle, but Louis stilled, catching David''s wrist to stop his progress, though he didn''t pull his hand away. David frowned as Louis pulled back, brows furrowed as he searched David''s expression.


    "David," Louis said, his thumb stroking David''s wrist, "I want to be clear. Is this what you want?"


    David nodded.


    "And, to be sure we are on the same page¡ª" Louis started.


    "I want to sleep with you," David cut him off, voice breathless. "In the euphemistic sense."


    Louis sucked in a breath and released his hand so he could reel David in for another kiss. David groaned into his mouth, hands forgetting their task, but Louis was not as distractible. His fingers deftly worked open his own belt and then David''s even as he continued pressing teasing kisses to David''s mouth.


    As soon as his belt was undone, David shimmied out of his pants and briefs, kicking his loafers and socks off with them. Louis was wearing Oxford''s and had to put a little more effort into disrobing the rest of the way. David leaned back against the media console to watch as Louis sat down on the edge of the bed to take off his shoes.


    There was something a little thrilling about being there completely naked as Louis finished undressing, especially when Louis kept giving him heated looks every time he looked up. David swallowed hard as Louis stood again, and stripped out of his charcoal gray trousers.


    David felt a little shy again as he looked at Louis, bared before him. Every inch of him was gorgeous. David had never thought that about someone''s dick before, but Louis''s was definitely gorgeous, too. He was half hard already and David wondered what it would feel like in his hand.


    Louis let him look his fill until David''s eyes slowly moved up to meet his, then he stepped forward again. David stood, his stomach starting to tighten with something approaching anxiety.


    "David," Louis said, opening his arms again. David let out a shaky breath and stepped into his embrace. Louis''s hands pressed flat into his back, pulling him in until he was plastered up against Louis''s body. David''s breath stuttered and Louis soothed his hands over his back, then up to cradle his jaw.


    This kiss was softer, more tender. Louis sucked and bit at his lip, teasingly light until David relaxed into him, chasing the sensations. One of Louis''s hands stroked down his body until it was pressed to the small of his back. Louis shifted his hips against David''s making him gasp.


    The hard length of Louis''s dick pressed against David''s as he shifted his hips again. The pressure and friction was making David hard, too. It was even better when Louis''s hand came to rest on David''s ass, pulling him harder against him.


    "Lou¡ªLouis," David stuttered, clutching at Louis''s head as he kissed down the side of his neck.


    "Hm?" Louis prompted, the sound vibrating through Louis''s chest where David''s hands gripped his ribs.


    It took David a moment to straighten his thoughts. "Louis, I¡ª" he swallowed, then pressed his forehead into Louis''s neck to ground himself, just breathing for a minute. "I''ve never done this before," he admitted. "I''m not sure..." He trailed off, leaning back to search Louis''s face.


    Louis hummed, pressing lingering kisses over each of David''s features until David thought he''d explode with the sweetness of it.


    "That''s fine," he said, curling a hand over David''s ear and stroking his hair. "Do you know what you want to try?"


    David shook his head. "Can you just... show me?"


    Louis considered for a moment but nodded. He pulled back from David and took his hand, leading him toward the bed.


    "I don''t have any condoms or... anything," David admitted, flushing.


    Louis shrugged and gently pushed David onto the bed. He pulled David onto his side and sprawled in front of him, hand running over his side and then the curve of his ass, giving a slight squeeze.


    David considered stopping him. He wasn¡¯t very versed on sex in general, but he was pretty sure it was common sense that anal sex without a condom¡ªlet alone lube¡ªwas less than ideal. And David definitely didn¡¯t possess either of those things.


    "There are other things we can do," Louis said, tone amused. "I don''t typically carry condoms with me, either."


    It was a surprise to realize that David was a little disappointed by that. They were lying close enough that David could feel the heat of Louis''s body. Louis was looking at him, touching him, like he wanted David. For the first time in his life, David wanted that, too. He wanted every part of Louis so badly that it made his chest ache.


    ¡°I¡¯m clean, though. I¡¯ve been tested since my last relationship.¡±


    David gave a shaky nod, feeling out of his depth and still hungry for whatever Louis had in mind.


    "So, what other things are we doing?" David asked.


    Louis''s lip quirked up into a smile that immediately drew David''s eyes.


    "I''d like to touch you and grind against you," Louis said. "I''d like to blow you, too."


    David''s face flamed. "No, you can''t do that!" David said, a little more loudly than he meant to. Louis frowned, looking a little disappointed before David explained. "I haven''t showered since this morning and I''m all sweaty and gross. So not that." David threw an arm over his face in embarrassment and Louis chuckled.


    Louis carefully peeled David''s arm from his face and leaned in to nibble at his ear. "All right, not that," he said. "But touching?"


    "Mmm," David moaned as Louis sucked at the base of his jaw. "Yeah, yeah, touching...." He lost his train of thought again as Louis shifted closer to him, pressing David onto his back and settling half on top of him.


    Louis''s thigh pressed up snugly against David''s groin and there was a moment of uncertainty, David''s body freezing without his permission. Louis pulled back a fraction of an inch.


    "Do you want me to stop?" he asked, though David could feel his dick pressing hard and insistent against David''s hip.


    David shook his head. "No, keep going," he said, hands moving down to grip Louis''s sides and then his ass, just because he could. That made Louis hiss in a breath, his hips giving a sharp little jolt that made heat coil in David''s belly. He did it again, liking the results.


    "Kiss me more," David prompted.


    Louis''s stubble rasped against his own as they kissed, his mouth hot and demanding against David¡¯s. He never knew kissing could feel like this before Louis. He had never wanted to kiss someone forever before, but he didn¡¯t think he¡¯d ever get tired of kissing Louis.


    "I want more of you," David said, not quite sure how to explain. He tugged at Louis''s arm, trying to slide himself further underneath Louis''s body.


    Louis shifted a little, but seemed hesitant to put his weight fully on top of David.


    "More," David insisted, "I want you on top."


    "Demanding," Louis mused, but slid over David until he could feel the weight of his entire body pressing him into the mattress. He settled his elbows on either side of David''s head and looked down at him with a quirked eyebrow.


    "Yeah, that," David groaned out, tilting his head up for a kiss.


    Louis didn¡¯t need any more prompting than that. David wasn¡¯t sure exactly what happened next, because their lips were pressed together again which seemed to strip him of all brainpower.


    Louis somehow slotted their hips together in a way that aligned their dicks just right. He ground down against David and David found himself canting his hips upward to match, his heels digging into the mattress for better purchase.


    Louis continued thrusting against him at an even pace until David was fully hard. He caught Louis''s hips again, trying to pull him down more firmly over him. This was good, but it wasn''t enough.


    "Louis," David said, begged, really. He still needed more, even if he wasn''t sure exactly how to get it.


    When a big hand slid down between them, gripping both of their dicks together, David thought he might pass out from the intensity of the sensation.


    David let out a strangled noise against Louis''s lips, then pulled away, panting. He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to hold himself back. David''s hands ran frantically over every part of Louis that he could reach.


    ¡°Wait, Louis¡ª¡± David groaned, biting his lip hard enough to hurt¡ªhard enough to pull him back from the edge. This was all too much. ¡°If you keep going¡ª Fuck. I¡¯m going to¡ª¡± He couldn¡¯t seem to string together a coherent sentence as pressure built in his dick, his stomach tightening in anticipation of release.


    ¡°Good,¡± Louis rumbled into his ear, warm hand quickening the pace. David bucked up against him. He had never felt anything like this in his life. The pressure built to a peak and then exploded. David gave a very undignified cry that probably announced to the neighbors what was going on in here. Right now, though, he really didn¡¯t care.


    ¡°You¡¯re so beautiful,¡± Louis muttered, kissing and biting at David¡¯s neck as he continued thrusting against him. The sensation continued to build until it was almost painful and then he felt Louis tense over him, another wave of heat spilling between them as he came.


    An eternity seemed to pass in the instant before he collapsed on top of David. He stayed there for one precious moment before rolling over onto his side. David grumbled an incoherent complaint at the loss of contact.


    David could feel the press of sleep beckoning as his body lay lax and sated, but his eyes were too focused on the way Louis looked. His hair was messed up from David¡¯s hands and there were stubble burns across his chin that probably matched the ones David could feel against his own jaw.


    He reached out a hand and traced it over Louis''s nose and lips, unable to stop the smile that spread across his face. Louis caught his hand and pressed a kiss to the tip of his finger. David''s heart squeezed.


    This was more than he''d ever imagined¡ªmore than he ever could have dreamed. It was as close to perfect as it was probably possible to get and David had no idea what he was supposed to be feeling right now, but what he was feeling was everything.


    Was this supposed to be experimentation? Was he supposed to wake up tomorrow and realize this was all casual? Or was he supposed to want this every day from now on¡ªto want Louis from now on?


    Because, right now, all David knew was that his heart felt like it would explode from the strength of the love he felt for Louis.


    Louis''s hand followed David''s as he traced the sharp line of Louis''s jaw, then smoothed his fingers over a thick eyebrow. Dark eyes were locked on his when his gaze finally settled.


    ¡°Thank you,¡± Louis muttered, pressing David''s palm to his lips. David gave a tiny smile.


    ¡°For what?¡± he asked. It seemed a little clich¨¦ to be thanking him for sex. Louis was the one who always complained about corny dialogue.


    Luckily for him, though, David liked corny dialogue.


    ¡°For being here," he said, his voice so soft it was nearly a whisper. "For being with me. Just, for being you.¡± Louis gave a little shrug and David¡¯s heart fluttered. He leaned over to deposit a tender kiss to Louis''s eyebrow. His nose. His cheek. And, finally, his lips.


    Louis seemed almost to get bashful after that, and he pulled David tight against him, burying his face in David''s neck. David hummed contentedly and stroked his fingers through Louis''s hair.


    They lay there for a few long moments, before David pulled away.


    ¡°This is great and all, but I really am gross and covered in airport and jizz. I think we should shower before we go to bed.¡±


    Louis''s face did a strange dance like he was trying not to smile, before he let out a chuckle that turned into a full blown laugh. David sat up and smacked him lightly on the arm. Louis kept laughing until David couldn¡¯t help but join him.


    ¡°Fine, let¡¯s shower,¡± Louis gasped when they could breathe again. ¡°Wouldn¡¯t want you to get airport all over the sheets. What would Mrs. Hamish think?¡±


    David stuck his tongue out and climbed off the bed, pulling Louis toward the bathroom.


    Showering together, he thought, was actually a lot less romantic and sexy than it looked in movies. The stream of water was not that big, so one of them was perpetually half out of the shower, freezing their butt off against the tiles. Still, they managed to wash up well enough to suit, before getting back out.


    ¡°Are you staying?¡± David asked as he rifled through his drawers, tossing Louis a pair of red sweat pants.


    David couldn¡¯t help but watch as Louis pulled them on, noticing that he didn¡¯t bother to put his underwear back on. That was an oddly pleasing thought, though David didn¡¯t really understand why. Louis wearing his clothing was just nice. Like laying claim to him somehow. David suddenly flushed, wondering if this was how Louis felt when David had worn his shirt.


    ¡°Do you want me to stay?¡± Louis asked after a long moment.


    David tore his eyes away from Louis''s body to meet his gaze. He no longer had that haunted look that he''d worn when David pulled him out of his car, but there was still an edge to his expression. David wanted to pull him back into the bed and cuddle him until he no longer had anything to worry about.


    ¡°Yes,¡± David said with a decisive nod. ¡°I want you to stay.¡±


    David didn¡¯t think he was imagining the way Louis''s shoulders relaxed. ¡°Then, I¡¯ll stay.¡±


    "Good."


    They turned down the bed after David had stripped off the sheet they¡¯d just had sex on. Maybe he was a prude, but that was gross.


    Louis just watched him with half a smile on his face, then climbed under the duvet when he''d finished. He patted the other side of the bed and David jumped back onto the surprisingly springy mattress, almost jostling Louis out of it. He laughed and settled down under the covers.


    For some reason, this felt almost more awkward than having sex. He wasn''t sure if Louis liked to cuddle and he wasn''t sure if there was more he should say, either. Louis hadn¡¯t complained the last time David had insisted on spooning, in fact he never complained when David got touchy, but he didn¡¯t initiate it all that often, either. Sometimes David wondered if Louis was just humoring him, or if he was bothered by David¡¯s desire for physical affection.


    He felt like they should talk. About tonight. All of tonight. And everything else, too.


    And he really wanted to cuddle, actually. It felt strange lying in bed and not cuddling.


    He glanced over at Louis, then shifted on the bed a little. Louis''s eyes were already closed. David chewed on his cheek. He should let him sleep.


    When David fidgeted again, though, a strong arm wrapped around his middle and pulled him back against Louis''s chest. David relaxed, pulling Louis''s arm more securely around him. He liked the way he could feel Louis''s heart against his back.


    ¡°Go to sleep,¡± Louis murmured. ¡°We can talk in the morning.¡±


    David nodded, suddenly feeling the exhaustion of the day catching up to him. He twined his fingers with Louis''s and closed his eyes. There would be time tomorrow to think about all of the implications of sleeping with Louis and to figure out where they were going from here.


    But, right now, it felt promising.

 Chapter Eighteen

    Season one of Night Mist hit CyberVids to immediate and surprising success. The next season was green-lit within weeks and filming would begin soon after. Rosemarie had continued in a slow decline, but she was still holding on.


    Louis was grateful to have something to keep him occupied, but he was starting to feel restless again. Spending time with David and Rosemarie was great¡ªeven if they actually were building a bookshelf that took up half the living room¡ªbut he couldn¡¯t help but wonder if he should be doing something more. He felt like he was wasting time. No matter what he was doing, he felt like he should be somewhere else doing something else. The only respite was when he was with David and Rosemarie.


    Since they¡¯d met, David and Rosemarie had really built up a good rapport¡ªto the point where Louis sometimes felt left out of their shenanigans. Rosemarie still ignored his relationship with David, but that was nothing new. She no longer shot them disapproving or worried looks, but she didn¡¯t ever really acknowledge them, either.


    Despite that, David had slipped neatly into their lives, becoming a part of the household with surprising ease. He still technically lived in the yellow room at the B&B, but Rosemarie had prepared the guest room for him in case he wanted to spend the night.


    Louis wasn''t sure how to take that gesture. The fact that she clearly accepted David into her home was promising, but the guest room felt like a moratorium, too.


    It hadn''t been an empty gesture, either, though. David often did spend the night and Rosemarie had never seemed less than pleased with it. Louis thought she liked both David''s vibrant energy and the fact that he kept Louis occupied. So far, neither David nor Louis seemed inclined to go any further than kissing with Rosemarie in the same house, but Louis couldn¡¯t help his mind from going back to that night after they had made love in that tiny yellow bed at the B&B.


    He wanted that again. He craved it like he craved air, but he wasn¡¯t sure that David felt the same. The experience hadn¡¯t scared him off, which was encouraging, but David hadn¡¯t made any move to repeat it either. Not that they''d had much of an opportunity between the DIY construction and the preparations for the official start of filming.


    ¡°I can¡¯t wait to start filming again,¡± David said one day, grinning at something on his phone. He was sprawled across the couch, feet propped up on Louis''s lap as Rosemarie sat on the wingback by the TV. Louis gave his foot a squeeze, making him jump and send him a playful scowl.


    ¡°I can¡¯t wait for the show to end,¡± Louis groused.


    ¡°It was your choice to take the job, Lou,¡± Rosemarie scolded. ¡°Don¡¯t complain when you had a choice.¡±


    ¡°Fine,¡± Louis said. He didn''t know why he complained, either. It wasn''t like he wasn''t glad David was enjoying himself. And he had a lot to be grateful for, he knew it.


    But he still didn''t want to be here.


    At the time, it hadn''t really felt like a choice, either. It still didn''t. In the most literal sense, he could leave. But if he did, there was no certainty that she would be here when he got back. It was growing more and more obvious just how sick Rosemarie really was. Louis''s whole body recoiled from that thought and he let out a long breath.


    ¡°I don¡¯t understand what you have against it,¡± David said, sitting up and swinging his feet off of Louis''s lap.


    Louis looked over at him with a raised eyebrow. ¡°It¡¯s a TV production. The budget is only so-so, the resources are limited, and there¡¯s always a chance of cancellation. It''s just popular media.¡±


    ¡°Why does that make it less worthy of our time?¡± David argued. ¡°The cast and crew, Nabila and Jennifer and everyone else, pour their hearts into this. It¡¯s art just as much as a big budget film. More so, maybe.¡± David looked legitimately irritated. It wasn''t an expression he wore often and Louis found he did not care for it, but he couldn''t make himself back down, either.


    ¡°I¡¯m not denying their passion," he said, "I just don¡¯t share it.¡±


    He could tell that David was only getting more wound up, but David didn¡¯t get angry often enough for Louis to know how to defuse it. Part of him didn''t want to diffuse it.


    ¡°Then why are you here?¡± he asked, then, seeming to realize what he said, amended it to, ¡°Why did you take the job? It¡¯s not like you need it.¡±


    ¡°It¡¯s a job,¡± Louis countered with the same words David had used about why he acted in so many commercials. ¡°You don¡¯t have to have passion to do a job.¡±


    ¡°But if you have the choice, shouldn¡¯t you choose the projects you are passionate about?¡±


    Louis raised an eyebrow. He would love to choose a project he was passionate about, but that wasn¡¯t an option here. It had been sheer luck that there had been anything shooting within a fifty-mile radius of Midtown. He was, admittedly, lucky to have gotten the job at all. It would have been worse to be here without work to occupy his mind.


    ¡°I mean,¡± David said, ¡°that you should leave projects you aren¡¯t passionate about to the people who are.¡±


    Louis stiffened. So that was the issue. ¡°Nabila seemed to think that I would be suffice,¡± he snapped. ¡°She didn¡¯t have to choose me, David; I wasn¡¯t the only one auditioning. But she did, so here I am.¡±


    ¡°That doesn¡¯t mean you didn¡¯t have a choice in the matter,¡± David returned.


    "While you two argue, I''m going to run to the store,¡± Rosemarie said, looking up from her phone.


    She didn¡¯t seem all that concerned about the topic or that the two of them were arguing¡ªshe seemed to think they were being silly.


    Louis scowled, wondering if she was hoping they''d break up or maybe it was just that she only knew half of the context. That was uncharitable, of course. Rosemarie wasn''t that petty. He was just in a bad mood all around.


    ¡°What are you so upset about?¡± Louis demanded once Rosemarie had left.


    ¡°It seems unfair. You are taking an opportunity that you don¡¯t even want when there are other people who would die for this job.¡±


    ¡°Are you talking about yourself? Because, if you recall, I got you the fucking job,¡± Louis said. ¡°Whatever other actors wanted the job, you got it. Did that stop you from taking it?¡±


    David¡¯s face went pale, and he didn¡¯t answer for a long time. Louis swore internally at himself. That wasn¡¯t what he had meant, but it was too late to take it back now.


    ¡°You''re right,¡± David said, not meeting Louis''s eyes. After another moment, he shook his head and stood, stepping past Louis and heading for the stairs.


    ¡°Where are you going?" Louis called after him.


    "I''m going home," he said.


    There was a strange part of Louis that wanted to protest that David couldn''t have another home. That he belonged here with Louis, even when he was mad, but that was ridiculous. This might be the most serious relationship that Louis had ever had, but how much did that really mean? David didn''t belong to him¡ªdidn''t even really belong with him, if this was any indication.


    "You don¡¯t have a car! I¡¯ll drive you home,¡± Louis said, standing to follow him downstairs.


    ¡°Don¡¯t bother, Louis,¡± David said, stopping him at the stairs with an expression Louis had never seen him wear before. "I''ll get myself home. I think if I keep looking at you right now, I might punch you.¡±


    With that, he stormed down the stairs. Louis winced as he heard the front door slam behind him.


    Louis pressed his fingers to his eyes. How had their quiet morning turned into this so quickly?


    But he knew, of course. Louis knew exactly how it had turned into this. Louis was unhappy and he had taken it out on everyone around him. This was why he didn''t do relationships. He was not a pleasant person to be around long-term.


    It wasn¡¯t fair of him, not in the least, but he couldn¡¯t always stop himself, either. Sometimes he just wanted to see the world fall apart in some real way that would externalize some of what he felt. That was his problem, though.


    "Fuck," he muttered, the sentiment directed at nothing in particular.


    It wasn¡¯t David¡¯s fault or Rosemarie¡¯s. Rosemarie probably recognized he was in a Mood. That was probably why she left. It would have been more merciful for her to tell Louis to leave. Then she and David could have had a nice afternoon while Louis sulked.


    Even now, Louis had relatively little to complain about, so why couldn¡¯t he just keep his fucking mouth shut? What exactly was he hoping for?


    Louis sat down at the top of the stairs, staring at the enormous picture of a daisy that sat over the landing. If he followed David, he was pretty sure he''d actually get that punch he was promised. Besides, David had a cellphone. He could call a cab. It might take a while, but the part of him that was stung by what David said was a little vindictively satisfied by that.


    Decided, Louis returned to the couch and pulled out a book while he waited for Rosemarie to return so they could make dinner.


    After an hour passed, Louis began to worry a little. The store was only a ten-minute drive from the house, it shouldn¡¯t have taken her this long to go there and back.


    It was possible that she was just trying to avoid their argument, or that she''d gotten distracted¡ªRosemarie did love shopping¡ªbut there were other possibilities, too.


    Louis''s heart started to pound and his hand shook as he pulled out his phone.


    What if she had gotten sick or collapsed in the middle of the store just like last time? Should Louis really let her out of his sight at this point? She was a grown woman and she was still insistent about her independence, but she was also... Well, she needed him to look out for her, too.


    He should call her. He should just call her and she''d either answer or she wouldn''t. But either way, he''d know what to do next. Instead, he opened the GPS app he''d so resented at first and checked for her location. She was home. A whole new slew of scenarios flashed through his head.


    Louis practically vaulted down the stairs, opening the door just in time for him to nearly run her over. He pulled up short and she gasped, but her surprise quickly turned into the expression she always wore when she was about to scold him.


    ¡°What did you do now?¡± she asked. ¡°I found David walking down the street. Were you really going to make him walk back into town? Do you know how far that is?¡±


    ¡°I wasn¡¯t. I offered to drive and he refused. He has a phone, he could call a cab,¡± Louis said.


    Rosemarie gave him a look like it was somehow his fault that David was stubborn.


    ¡°Well, I gave him a ride back into town,¡± she said. Her expression changed, then, into something closer to worry than it had been before. ¡°What did you say to him, Lou?¡±


    Louis shifted uncomfortably. He didn''t really want to repeat what he''d said after she left. ¡°Why?¡±


    She pursed her lips, handing him the bag of groceries she was holding. ¡°He just wasn¡¯t himself.¡±


    Louis''s stomach knotted and he shrugged. ¡°We had a fight, is it so strange that he¡¯s upset?¡± He didn''t point out that he, too, was upset, or that he was a little irritated that she was scolding him instead of asking if he was all right.


    ¡°It is a little strange,¡± Rosemarie said, leading him back upstairs. ¡°I¡¯ve never seen him quiet for so long.¡±


    It wasn''t strange. Louis knew exactly why David was upset.


    ¡°I¡¯ll apologize tomorrow,¡± he said, watching Rosemarie closely to see if that was the reaction she was looking for.


    ¡°That¡¯s a start,¡± she said. ¡°I¡¯m not going to tell you that you shouldn''t fight; everyone has disagreements now and then. Just don¡¯t let your stubbornness make you forget how important he is to you.¡±


    Taken from Royal Road, this narrative should be reported if found on Amazon.


    Louis glared at her. ¡°You¡¯re my sister, why are you taking his side?¡± Louis demanded, probably more petulantly than the situation warranted.


    ¡°I''m always on your side, Lou," she said, reaching up to run a hand through his hair. Louis allowed it, enjoying the affection even though he was irritated. "Honestly, I''m not sure what exactly you two were arguing about or why it set you both off. But I do know you. I know how much you will regret it if you push him away."


    Louis stepped back and busied himself unpacking the bag from the store. There was an instant meal and a package of meat. Louis made a face, but didn¡¯t comment as Rosemarie began to prepare dinner.


    ¡°I haven¡¯t forgotten,¡± he muttered after so long that Rosemarie looked a little confused for a moment before she smiled at him and nodded.


    Now that the emotion of the moment was gone, Louis could feel the beginning tendrils of worry starting to creep through him down to his fingertips. It wasn¡¯t like they hadn¡¯t disagreed before, but he knew he''d hit a sore point for David.


    Even if he wanted to mend it, though, he wasn''t sure how. He wasn''t sure if David would even want to anymore. There was a part of him that wondered if this was the end of whatever they''d had between them.


    He would call in the morning and apologize. Maybe he could try to visit if David would let him.


    *****


    David, as it turned out, was excellent at holding grudges.


    He had never thought of himself as a particularly spiteful person, but every time he saw Louis''s number on the caller ID, his finger automatically declined it. He didn¡¯t even bother letting it go to voicemail. He didn¡¯t want to hear what Louis had to say.


    Yet.


    ¡°You¡¯re being petty,¡± Jennifer said for what must have been the fifth time this morning. The two of them were sitting in his room, Jennifer cross-legged on the bed with a catalogue of special effects supplies open on her knee and David slumped in the chair by the window. ¡°I doubt he really thinks you only got the job at his behest. In fact, I don¡¯t entirely believe that he actually said that to you.¡±


    ¡°Maybe not in those exact words, but he absolutely did say it. And he¡¯s not even wrong,¡± David said, scrubbing a hand through his hair. ¡°He did get me the job. It really had nothing to do with me. I''m a hypocrite.¡±


    ¡°My understanding, and correct me if I''m wrong," by which she meant, I am aboslutely right and you should not correct me, "is that he asked Nabila to reconsider you after he watched The Wake of War and decided you were worth a shot. Is that not an indication that he appreciated your talent?¡±


    ¡°But he only watched it because you told him to,¡± David pointed out. ¡°If you hadn¡¯t both meddled, I would have been passed over just like every other fucking time.¡±


    ¡°Language,¡± Jennifer said with a fake gasp. "What would your mother say?"


    David glared at her. ¡°Like you can talk,¡± David said, though he felt guilty anyway.


    Jennifer smirked. ¡°I don¡¯t have an image to maintain. Or, I do, but it¡¯s not your image,¡± she said. "Or a mother who still has a genuine swear jar."


    David buried his head in his arms and then promptly swore again when Louis''s name popped up on his phone. Apparently he wasn''t going to give up.


    Jennifer cackled, seeming to enjoy his pain as much as usual.


    ¡°I don¡¯t even want to see him, Jennifer,¡± he said. ¡°How am I supposed to start working with him again come Monday?¡±


    ¡°You stop ignoring him, first,¡± Jennifer said, giving his phone a pointed look as she flipped the pages of her catalogue.


    ¡°I just said I don¡¯t want to see him.¡±


    ¡°He might be trying to apologize,¡± Jennifer pointed out.


    ¡°I don¡¯t want him to,¡± David whined. He wasn''t even really sure Louis had anything to apologize for. He''d hurt David''s feelings, but he''d hurt his feelings with the truth. And it wasn''t like David hand''t started it. "I also may have implied that he was being selfish taking a role he doesn''t even want. And by implied I mean explicitly accused."


    "Then you call him and apologize," she said.


    "I don''t want to do that, either."


    Jennifer gave him that look she had when she was almost out of patience with him.


    ¡°I get that your feelings were hurt, but you need to talk to him and work it out. I cannot tolerate so much of you all the time. These last months with Louis monopolizing your time have been like a godsend.¡±


    ¡°Gee, thanks,¡± David said. ¡°Good to know that my best friend doesn¡¯t even want my company.¡±


    Jennifer set aside her catalogue and stood up and then propped her hands on the arms of David''s chair so she could loom over him in a way that made him feel distinctly wary. She studied him for a minute before giving his cheek a consoling pat, then immediately flicking him on the forehead.


    ¡°Davie, there is nothing wrong with using your connections to get work. That¡¯s business. If you cannot tolerate people working on your behalf, you are never going to get anywhere. Do you want to be an actor or not?¡±


    David glared, but Jennifer¡¯s expression was completely serious so he answered. ¡°Yes, of course I do. I¡¯ve worked for this for years.¡±


    ¡°Then stop moaning about how you got your job and go fucking do your job. Instead, just be glad that there are people who want to see you succeed.¡±


    David didn¡¯t move from where he was slouched and Jennifer straightened with a huge sigh. She picked up his guitar from where he¡¯d stashed it under the bed and dropped it in his lap.


    ¡°Then go be a musician.¡±


    ¡°I¡¯m no good,¡± David said. ¡°You¡¯ve said so yourself.¡±


    ¡°I said your lyrics have no popular appeal. I said you¡¯ll never be a rock star and you¡¯ll never be a pop star. And you don''t need natural talent to succeed. You could succeed if you wanted to. But you don¡¯t.¡±


    ¡°What¡¯s that supposed to mean?¡±


    ¡°What that means, is that if you really want something, it¡¯s on you to take advantage of the opportunities you''re given to get it. It¡¯s neither mine nor Louis''s responsibility to push you toward your dreams. If you want it, accept help where you get it and do the rest your goddamn self.¡±


    With that, Jennifer spun around, heels clacking across the wood floor as she left David¡¯s little yellow room.


    David stared at the guitar in his lap for a long time.


    He was being petty. He knew it. Louis probably was trying to apologize. That was the grownup thing to do. It''s what David should be doing, but he was still sore from the comment, even if Louis didn''t really mean it like that.


    He had expressed over and over again that he believed in David, but it did little to stop the little voice of doubt inside of David from picking up on the words and twisting them.


    David gave the guitar a quick strum, closing his eyes as he listened to the sound, tuning a couple of the strings until the chords rang true. Then he picked a couple notes.


    Jennifer was right about music. David didn''t really care to make it work. He was happy having this just for himself, just for the people closest to him. That was more than enough.


    The action of it was soothing, too. It was something to capture the attention of both his mind and his body. David strummed, and as he did, he began to relax into it, humming a little as he settled on a tune. He sang the words softly, barely more than a murmur, but he let them carry his mind away from the present.


    *****


    Louis parked his car outside the B&B and called David''s number again. Declined. Again.


    David clearly didn''t want to see or hear from him. He should probably give him some more time to cool off. Or maybe he was meant to just leave it at that? Louis''s chest ached at that thought.


    He was deciding whether he should leave when Jennifer Yang Marched out of the B&B looking positively furious. Louis gripped the wheel but rolled down the window when she gestured.


    "You''re here. Good. He''s upstairs pouting," Jennifer said. Surprisingly, her anger didn''t seem directed at him.


    ¡°Is he all right?¡± Louis asked.


    ¡°He¡¯s just being David,¡± she said, as though that was explanation enough.


    Louis wanted to go up immediately and demand an audience with David, but he also wanted more information. Especially information that might help him avoid making things worse. If Jennifer''s bad mood wasn¡¯t directed at him, she may share her intel.


    "Is he¡ª" Louis paused, not sure how to ask what he wanted to know. "Did he tell you what happened?"


    Jennifer crossed her arms, eyeing him imperiously. "Something about you implying he couldn''t get a job without your help."


    Louis winced. "I didn''t say¡ª"


    "Does it matter? Maybe that''s not what you said, but that''s what he heard." Jennifer shrugged, then. "Sometimes his hearing is pretty bad, though, since he has his head stuck so far up his own ass. Are you going to be stupid about this, too?"


    Louis grimaced. "I said somethings I shouldn''t have," Louis admitted slowly. "I want to fix things. I want to apologize. That''s not what I meant, but I know how he is about the topic."


    ¡°Listen, I¡¯m sure you both said things that shouldn¡¯t have been said. But that doesn¡¯t mean that he doesn¡¯t need to work through his own shit himself.¡±


    Louis hesitated then asked, "Do you want me to leave him up there, then?" He didn''t want to leave David to figure anything out alone, but he''d defer to Jennifer''s better judgement. Right now, Louis just wanted to see him. Desperately.


    Even these past four days had bene torture without him and he wasn''t sure he could make it through another three before they saw each other for work. He didn''t want the next time they saw each other to be for work, either.


    ¡°No, you should definitely go see him,¡± she said. "He might not let you in the door, though. He''s very childish when he''s feeling guilty."


    With that, Jennifer gave him a finger wave and climbed into her car.


    Louis waited until she''d sped out of the lot before going in. He wasn¡¯t sure whether he should try to call or text again to announce his presence. David would probably ignore him either way, so he didn''t bother.


    When he reached the door to the yellow room, he paused. A soft melody drifted from the room.


    ¡°Shoot,¡± he hard David mutter softly as an errant note played. Then he started again. The melody was simple and as familiar to Louis as the smell of Rosemarie''s perfume or the house he''d grown up in.


    Louis leaned up against the doorframe, eyes burning.


    David didn¡¯t have a beautiful voice, exactly, and some of the notes were harsh where the version in Louis''s mind was always sung in Rosemarie¡¯s soft voice, but Louis was utterly captivated. It felt significant that David was singing this song.


    He rested his head back against the wall and closed his eyes, content to listen to David play forever. He must have been there for twenty minutes as David repeated the song again and again until it flowed smoothly and easily.


    Louis shifted his weight to the other foot and the floorboard creaked. The music stopped with an errant twang of the strings. Louis flinched, he took a moment to smooth his shirt and his emotions then gave a short knock.


    No answer.


    Louis looked down at his feet. ¡°I know you¡¯re in there, David,¡± he said. "But I''ll leave if you still don''t want to see me."


    There was another long silence. Louis pulled at his eyebrow. This was pathetic and probably pushing David''s boundaries. He should leave and give David the space he wanted.


    ¡°The door¡¯s unlocked," David''s voice said, quiet but clear.


    Louis sucked in a steadying breath, hoping that his emotions didn¡¯t show on his face as he entered the room.


    David was curled on the floor by the foot of his bed, a guitar clutched in his hands. He still looked angry and maybe a little nervous.


    Louis cursed himself for not considering the fact that now was probably not the best time to invade David''s music. He cursed his younger self for being rude enough that his words had left such a lasting impression on David.


    ¡°You play the guitar,¡± Louis observed softly, closing the door behind him and standing awkwardly in the archway to the bedroom.


    ¡°I don¡¯t,¡± David said shortly.


    He made no move to continue playing, but neither did he set the guitar down¡ªpossibly to give Louis the impression that he was in the middle of something and they would have to make this short.


    Louis had no interest in making this short.


    He wondered if this was how most people felt about other people, like they would die if they had to be alone for another day. It was unfamiliar to Louis. He¡¯d always thrived in solitude, this new dependence on someone else¡¯s company was unsettling.


    ¡°I heard you playing,¡± Louis said, ignoring his denial. ¡°You¡¯re good.¡±


    ¡°It¡¯s just a hobby,¡± David said, looking away. He didn''t seem to believe the compliment was sincere. ¡°Did you want something, or are you just here to eavesdrop.¡±


    ¡°Sorry,¡± Louis said. ¡°I didn¡¯t mean to, I just heard you playing and couldn¡¯t help it. That''s Rosemarie¡¯s favorite song.¡±


    David¡¯s expression softened. ¡°I know.¡±


    Louis stared at him, feeling unnervingly helpless as he tried to figure out where to start. There was so much hanging between them right now. Some of it was his fault, some of it David''s, and some of it was nobody''s fault in particular.


    ¡°I¡¯m sorry,¡± Louis said at last, still standing awkwardly two steps from the door. He shoved his hands in his pockets. ¡°That''s why I''m here. I wanted to apologize. I know you don''t need me to achieve whatever it is you want.¡±


    ¡°Right,¡± David said, though his tone was just the wrong side of sarcastic.


    ¡°I mean it," Louis insisted, looking down at David with all the sincerity he felt. "You are talented and hard working. You''re a great colleague and an even better friend. I want you to succeed. I know that you resent it, but I still want to help you. And not because I think you couldn''t do it otherwise, or because I think you deserve it, or even just because I want things to be easier for you.


    "I want it for the rest of the world''s sake, too." He felt like an idiot standing here saying these things, but something about David always possessed him to share more of himself than he was comfortable with. "I think the world would be better for knowing you." He hesitated a moment before admitting, thickly, "My life has certainly been better for your part in it."


    Louis felt his face heating and he shifted uncomfortably. David, too, was turning red from his collar to his hairline. The two of them waited in awkward silence for too long until David finally shifted, patting the bed by his shoulder.


    "Sit down, you''re making this awkward," he moaned, burying his face in the crook of an elbow.


    "My apologies," Louis said wryly. "But I mean it."


    "Fine," David said, patting the bed again, the movement urgent enough that Louis chuckled. He did sit, though.


    "Jeeze," David grumbled. "I was going to be mad at you for at least another day."


    "You''re not mad anymore?"


    "I can''t be mad when you say things like that! Now I''m just embarrassed and sort of wondering if you are sound of mind."


    Louis chuckled, pressing his knee into David''s shoulder. David leaned back into him and Louis felt all the tension from the last four days drain out of him.


    "I''m sorry, too," David said, tilting his head back to look up at Louis. "I shouldn''t have said all of that. I know why you''re here and I''m glad you took the job. Really glad. I think about it sometimes¡ªhow, if it weren''t for all of the convoluted circumstances didn''t put us both here, we probably wouldn''t have ever met. We''d have lived within five miles of each other but we never would have met."


    He hummed in agreement. Louis thought about that sometimes, too. He''d come up with a million different ways that they might have met anyway. Working together, in Avery''s bookshop, or just bumping into each other on the streets. But each one of them had its flaws and uncertainties. If they hadn''t met here, would David have ever have considered talking to him, even if he had recognized him? Would Louis have given David the time of day?


    "I got lucky," Louis murmured, then, unable to help himself, he combed his fingers through David''s hair. David smiled and Louis stroked his cheek.


    "Me, too!" David said, laughing. "I can think of all sorts of places that we might have run into each other, but I get stuck on the part where we''d actually talk to one another. It would have been a real shame."


    Louis felt that was an understatement. Louis glanced down at the guitar that was still sitting in David''s lap.


    "Will you play it again?" Louis asked tentatively. He was worried that he might break the truce, but he wanted to hear David play again.


    David stiffened, biting his lip as he staring up at Louis with those huge blue eyes. His fingers turned white on the frets of the guitar and Louis gave him a half-smile, threading his fingers through his hair again.


    "You don''t have to. But I''d like to hear you play again if you''ll let me."


    David opened his mouth, and Louis was sure he was going to refuse, but after staring at Louis for another moment, he just nodded. Slowly, he straightened up, settling the guitar on his thigh and leaning back against Louis''s leg.


    Louis stayed completely silent as David began strumming the chords.


    His voice was high and tight at first, nothing like it had been when he was alone. Louis found himself playing with the hairs at the nape of David''s neck. The touch seemed to ease something in David and he relaxed into it, his voice growing stronger and easier. Louis closed his eyes and listened.


    As the music gradually came to a stop, Louis opened his eyes, ignoring the way they stung.


    "Thank you," Louis said, his voice a little thick. David turned to look up at him, his eyes warm and sweet.


    Louis inhaled deeply and wondered how he had not realized before this moment that he was in love with David.

 Chapter Nineteen

    Things almost went back to normal after that.


    David hadn''t entirely gotten over Louis''s comments, but he''d also been pretty rude himself. So the two of them tried to work past it mostly by ignoring it.


    That was David¡¯s favorite method of dealing with things.


    Come Monday, they were back on speaking terms, if still a little more cautious than before. Despite that, David was relieved that he could be close to Louis again. He had to tone down some of his enthusiasm at work, but his stomach still bubbled with joy every time he saw him.


    David felt a little like gloating about the fact that he¡¯d snagged Louis Greene. Only, he really couldn¡¯t do that at work. It would be unprofessional.


    Clearly, David was not being as discreet as he had meant to be on set, though, because Nabila had already commented on how she didn¡¯t mind them seeing each other, but they better keep working well together because the show depended on it. David assured her that there was nothing to worry about and Louis had said that if he was that unprofessional, she should fire him.


    ¡°I would,¡± she said, ¡°but I¡¯m talking more about David.¡±


    ¡°Hey,¡± David said, though, on second thought, that was probably fair. Louis did take the word professionalism to a whole new level. He started getting irritated if he forgot his lines more than twice in a day. David, on the other hand, forgot at least one line at least once a scene. Sometimes he just made them up when he couldn¡¯t get them right.


    Louis hated it, but Nabila hadn¡¯t discouraged his ad-libbing.


    It was good after so long to start getting back into character. Even Louis seemed to be liking the direction that the plot was taking.


    ¡°This season you¡¯ll be meeting the devil himself,¡± Nabila had told them. ¡°And the plot will focus less on the monsters and more on the Hellports.¡±


    Louis had commented that bigger storylines were more interesting, and David had just been excited that they were working again. So far the reviews for the show were overwhelmingly positive. David hadn¡¯t been able to make himself watch it, but he had promised that he¡¯d go through the whole thing with Rosemarie one of these days.


    He hadn¡¯t had much of a chance to visit lately, though.


    It wasn¡¯t because he was avoiding Rosemarie, but he might have been avoiding Louis just a little bit since their fight.


    Their argument had reminded David that things weren''t simple between them. He had started to forget the boundaries and shape of their relationship. David didn''t doubt that Louis cared for him, but the more he thought about it, the more he noticed the ways their lives just didn''t match up. Their goals didn''t match up.


    In all likelihood, this was just an interlude in their lives. He should take it and be grateful that he''d had the chance to find something special with Louis and to learn things about himself that he didn''t know before. They had set up their tentative lines when they started going out and, to all appearances Louis was, at best, distracted and, at worst, losing interest entirely.


    He had not initiated anything since the night they slept together and David was beginning to wonder if he was misinterpreting something. Louis had seemed to enjoy himself, but David wasn''t exactly an expert in the subject. Maybe he''d decided that that was all he wanted from David or that David wasn''t able to give him what he wanted at all.


    That was fair. David was the one who had told Louis he didn''t want to hurt him, after all. Louis should guard his heart. It was only becoming a problem because David was nearly certain that he was falling in love with Louis. Hard.


    David had really thought that things were progressing smoothly, but the last time he tried to ask Louis over to spend the night, he had refused, saying that he needed to stay with Rosemarie in case she needed him.


    And Louis did need to spend time with Rosemarie. David knew that. But part of him was a little selfish, too. He wanted to pull Louis closer, even when he knew he should give him space.


    Because, the truth was that Rosemarie was getting worse. David could see it every time he visited the house. Even the sight of the house that had seemed so warm and welcoming a few months ago had started giving him a gnawing sense of panic. He didn¡¯t know how Louis coped.


    The simple answer to that, of course, was that Louis didn¡¯t have a choice.


    None of them really did.


    "Rosemarie wants you to come over for dinner tonight," Louis said, breaking David out of his thoughts. "She''s making that stew you liked."


    David''s mouth watered at the thought. "Mmm, I''ll have to get her recipe."


    "Good luck," Louis said, snorting. "She won''t even give me the recipe. I think it''s a sort of hostage situation."


    ¡°But I¡¯m far more persuasive,¡± David said, giving Louis the wide eyed, expectant look that he knew made it hard for people to refuse him.


    Louis smirked, reaching out to brush his fingers across David''s cheek before giving his ear a sharp tug. David yelped, putting a hand over his ear and scowling at Loius.


    ¡°You aren¡¯t as cute as you think you are,¡± Louis said, incorrectly. ¡°But," Louis continued, expression turning serious enough that it made David fidget, "there might be a way you could convince her.¡±


    ¡°Oh? Handyman work aside?¡±


    ¡°You have been working on that shelf for ages now and it¡¯s just still a pile of wood. No, I mean you could trade her something.¡±


    David raised an eyebrow, having no idea where Louis was going with that line of thought. Better judgement said he should redirect now, but curiosity won out. "What could I trade her?" he asked cautiously.


    "Her favorite song," Louis said, meeting his eyes.


    It took a moment for his meaning to click and, when it did, David''s stomach dropped. "You haven''t told anyone, have you?" he asked, voice a little faint.


    "Told them what?" Louis asked, looking annoyingly calm. Though, of course, why wouldn''t he be? What did Louis have to be nervous about? Actually, he probably thought David was the one being strange.


    "That I play or sing or whatever," David hissed, grabbing Louis''s arm and dragging him into a corner. "You can''t tell people that. I don''t play. Or sing."


    Louis gave him a really peculiar look that had his eyebrows making a series of complex expressions. ¡°You do play,¡± he said, though he had the courtesy to keep his voice down.


    David shook his head.


    "No, I don''t," he said. "It''s just a hobby."


    Louis shrugged, his expression almost sad. "All right," Louis said. "It wasn''t my place to ask. But, you know, she would appreciate it. And she wouldn''t judge you, either."


    David knew that. He also recognized he was being ridiculous about the whole thing. It did absolutely nothing to quell the queasiness at the idea of anyone hearing him play.


    David looked at his shoes and settled a nervous hand on Louis''s arm. ¡°You still can¡¯t tell anyone, okay? Promise.¡±


    Louis looked disproportionately unhappy about that, but he nodded anyway. David''s shoulders relaxed.


    "It''s your business who you tell," Louis said, "but, for what it''s worth, I thought you were good. And I know it would mean the world to Rosemarie to hear you sing that song."


    David grimaced. There was no way in hell he was letting anyone else hear him play. He hadn''t even wanted Louis to know¡ªhe''d especially not wanted Louis know, but that cat was out of the bag.


    "Sorry," Louis said, letting out a breath and clapping a hand on David''s shoulder. "I''m being pushy. You don''t have to play, David. Forget I asked. But, you''ll come to dinner? That command was from Rosemarie and I''ll pay the price for it if you don''t."


    David chuckled. ¡°Of course,¡± he said, though he was suddenly a lot more nervous about it.


    When he got back to his yellow room that evening, he couldn¡¯t get what Louis said out of his mind. Rosemarie would love to hear him sing, no, it would mean the world to her.


    He packed up his guitar and unpacked it five times before Louis dropped by to get him. He ended up chickening out, but he did slip his notebook into his back pocket before heading down to meet Louis.


    ¡°Rosemarie says that we need to watch Night Mist, because we¡¯re fantastic in it,¡± Louis said dryly as he entered the car.


    ¡°I promised her I¡¯d watch it after we finish filming,¡± he said. ¡°I can promise nothing else. If I watch it now, I might be too mortified to go to work tomorrow.¡±


    Louis smiled. ¡°I know what you mean. I can¡¯t watch any of the movies I¡¯ve been in.


    ¡°Even Starfly?¡± David asked, curiosity getting the better of him.


    ¡°Especially Starfly. I can¡¯t even hear the name without being overcome with crippling embarrassment.¡±


    ¡°You were so good in it, though!¡± David insisted.


    Louis glanced over at him.


    ¡°You watched it?¡± he asked, sounding a little unsure in a way that shouldn''t have been as cute as it was. Who knew even Louis Greene could be shy sometimes?


    ¡°I watched it every Saturday before bed,¡± he said, grinning. ¡°You were my childhood hero.¡±


    ¡°Please tell me that''s a lie,¡± Louis said, though David thought he was pleased at the praise.


    David deliberated for a moment before saying, ¡°I even wrote you a letter once.¡±


    ¡°A letter?¡± Louis asked carefully. ¡°What did it say?¡±


    ¡°I don''t remember, really,¡± he said, trying to keep his tone light. "It probably wasn''t even legible. I had terrible handwriting."


    "Have," Louis corrected and David laughed. "Well, thank you. It meant a lot to me."


    David snorted, though even the idea that the thought meant something to Louis now made his heart thunder. ¡°I bet you didn''t even read it.¡±


    Louis made a noncommittal noise. "I read everything they gave me. As you can imagine, though, certain things were... withheld, given that I was a minor and all the controversy surrounding it."


    David shot him a horrified look, but he could, in fact, imagine the kinds of things that might have been sent after Starfly aired. Hell, some of the fan mail David had received made him uncomfortable, even as an adult. "The controversy was bullshit," David said easily. "I was such a fan of the show that I read the book, too. In a way, I have you to thank for my favorite hobby and the subsequent educational success I achieved thanks to it. My English teachers loved me."


    "I''ll be asking for your report cards before I decide whether I should be flattered or not," Louis said.


    ¡°It''s a compliment!" David insisted. "Now, what other ideas do you have for getting Rosemarie¡¯s recipe for beef stew?¡± David asked, steering the conversation beck to less dangerous territory.


    ¡°Ritual sacrifice to a demon?¡± Louis suggested.


    David laughed. ¡°You¡¯re getting too caught up in Don Christoph.¡±


    ¡°I¡¯m pretty sure Don Christoph would be warning against that course of action,¡± Louis reasoned.


    Love what you''re reading? Discover and support the author on the platform they originally published on.


    David smirked, reaching over to squeeze Louis''s thigh, just because he could. ¡°Ah, then this is your very own devious streak?¡±


    ¡°I suppose so,¡± Louis said, his right hand falling from the wheel to give David''s a squeeze. David''s chest warmed as their fingers slotted together, their hands coming to rest between them.


    *****


    ¡°We¡¯re home!¡± Louis called when he arrived. The scent of boiling onions and red wine was already filling the air. David made an almost obscene sound of pleasure and practically vaulted up the stairs into the kitchen. Louis followed at a more reasonable pace.


    When he reached the kitchen, he found David balancing with one leg on a bar stool, the rest of his torso leaning all the way across the bar to accept a spoonful of stew from Rosemarie.


    Louis walked into the kitchen and kissed his sister on the cheek before returning to the other side of the counter to sit beside David.


    ¡°Anything you want help with?¡± David asked, fingers drumming on the table.


    Rosemarie shook her head, stirring her pot. ¡°I¡¯ve finished everything, thank you,¡± she said.


    ¡°How have you been? It¡¯s been ages since you were over,¡± she said.


    David chuckled uncomfortably. ¡°Yeah, it¡¯s been a little busy since filming started.¡±


    ¡°We still haven¡¯t had the chance to finish our bookshelf,¡± she said with a disappointed sigh. David nodded, giving Louis a look when he rolled his eyes.


    ¡°We could work on it this weekend.¡±


    ¡°Let¡¯s,¡± she said cheerfully.


    Louis didn¡¯t bother mentioning that David really should be practicing his lines and reviewing the script this weekend. David never reviewed his lines until the night before Louis had long since been forced to accept this fact.


    The two of them cheerfully made plans for their woodworking project. Louis wasn¡¯t sure if he was jealous or pleased that they got along well enough to spend time together without him. Not that he wouldn''t be there, too, but it required subtlety. If he was too obviously there, he would be drafted into things involving wood shavings and paint.


    ¡°You could join us, you know,¡± Rosemarie said.


    Louis raised an eyebrow. Case in point. ¡°No, thank you,¡± he said, ¡°I¡¯ll leave that to the professionals.¡±


    ¡°Thanks,¡± David said cheerfully.


    ¡°I wasn¡¯t talking about you. I¡¯m implying that you should hire a professional.¡±


    David laughed, but they continued making plans throughout the rest of dinner, even pulling out a notebook in the middle of the table and sketching out something to show Rosemarie. Louis watched them fondly, adding his own dry commentary where necessary or where he could get a rise out of one or the other of them.


    All in all, it was a pleasant evening. The kind that filled Louis with both contentment and foreboding.


    Rosemarie convinced David to stick around long enough to watch a movie with her¡ªno vampires¡ªbefore David insisted that he needed to get back. She finally let him go.


    Louis hadn''t asked David to stay and David hadn''t asked to. He was a little disappointed, but he''d been trying not to push. Things had felt a little delicate recently and it wasn''t like they shared a bed when David shared over¡ªas much as Louis might like that.


    ¡°I¡¯ll be back in an hour,¡± Louis told her before he and David left to get him back to his bed before midnight. Rosemarie shooed them off in good cheer.


    David was unusually quiet as they drove back to Mrs. Hamish¡¯s.


    Louis didn¡¯t mind silence in general, but David had once told him that it made him feel claustrophobic, so he couldn''t help but shoot him a glance as they hit the main road.


    ¡°I haven¡¯t seen her in a while,¡± David murmured after a while.


    Louis hummed in acknowledgement. There was another pause and then David glanced sideways at him.


    ¡°How are you doing?¡±


    Louis looked over in surprise. ¡°Me? I¡¯m fine.¡±


    David nodded as though he''d already known Louis''s answer, but his hand came over to rest on Louis''s thigh as though he also knew that it was a blatant lie. Of course it was a lie. And of course David knew it was a lie. How fine could Louis really be?


    ¡°Thank you,¡± Louis said after a moment of silence. ¡°For coming to dinner. She loves seeing you.¡±


    ¡°So do I,¡± David said, then gnawed on his lip in a way that drove his makeup artists to tears. ¡°I didn¡¯t think to ask you¡ªdo you mind if I come over this weekend?¡±


    A kind of dread settled in Louis''s stomach at the question. He didn''t like that at all. He wished that David didn''t feel the need to ask. He wouldn''t have before their trip to Weldstone Harbor. He probably wouldn''t have even after they''d had sex.


    Though things between them had been different lately, Louis''s feelings hadn¡¯t changed. He still wanted David around as often as he could have him despite the impending doom looming over them. Maybe because of it.


    ¡°You¡¯re welcome whenever you¡¯d like to come over,¡± Louis said. Then, unable to help himself, ¡°Why do you ask?¡±


    David shifted uncomfortably in his seat. Louis wished he could take his eyes off the road long enough to study his expression.


    ¡°Things just seem different now,¡± David said at last. ¡°It feels weird being there without you now.¡±


    ¡°Because of Rosemarie or because of us?¡± Louis clarified.


    David hesitated. ¡°Because of us.¡± David sighed. ¡°It feels like it could be an invasion in a way it didn¡¯t seem to be when we were friends. Rosemarie¡¯s my friend, too, but she''s your sister.¡±


    That warmed Louis''s heart. It was obvious that they were friends, of course, but to hear David state it so casually was kind of sweet.


    "We''re still friends," Louis said. "It''s no different than before."


    David made a humming sound that Louis couldn''t interpret as either an affirmation or denial.


    ¡°You are always welcome, David, and you don¡¯t need my permission, either. It¡¯s not even my house,¡± he pointed out.


    David looked at him for a moment. ¡°Thanks,¡± he said, sounding more sincere than the invitation warranted.


    In the lot to the B&B, Louis switched the car off and turned to David who had already unbuckled his seatbelt but made no move to leave. He watched Louis with a somewhat pathetic expression as though he was a dog being left at a shelter.


    Louis reached over and pulled him in for a kiss. David leaned in compliantly, one hand coming up to tug lightly at Louis''s hair. Louis sucked on his tongue and David made a delicious noise of surprise. David bit his lip lightly and Louis wished there wasn¡¯t a center console between them so he could pull David into his lap.


    David broke away, kissing the corner of Louis mouth as he spoke. ¡°Want to come up?¡±


    Lord, did he ever. But something caught the words in his throat. Leaving Rosemarie for any length of time just got more and more difficult for him. He was already away from her all day. The idea of leaving her all night, too, was too much.


    ¡°I can¡¯t,¡± Louis said, voice rough. ¡°God, I¡¯d love to, but I have to get back.¡±


    David looked like he wanted to pout as he sat back in seat, but then gave a little smile. ¡°All right. Goodnight.¡±


    "Goodnight," Louis returned.


    David took Louis''s hand and pressed a kiss to his knuckles and Louis squeezed back. Then, in an incredible demonstration of willpower, he released David''s hand and watched him make his way back into the B&B. David paused as he reached the door and gave Louis a little wave.


    Louis''s heart ached at the sight.


    Half of him wanted to text Rosemarie that he wasn¡¯t going to be back for a bit. She''d be asleep, anyway. He could stay for an hour or two, couldn''t he?


    If he did, though, she¡¯d know exactly what he was doing.


    She might have been taking this with far more grace than Louis would have expected¡ªprobably because of how much Rosemarie genuinely liked David¡ªbut he was still wary of saying too much about the details of their relationship. Even if it was only an implication.


    He wasn''t quite willing to rock the boat.


    And David was a friend to her, too. He¡¯d said so himself. Louis was loathe to make that situation uncomfortable for all of their sakes. He wanted to maintain this sense of peace between them for as long as he possibly could.


    Even if every cell in his body wanted to follow David up to his room and take him in his arms again. Not even to have sex, really¡ªthough he wouldn''t have said no to that, either¡ªhe just wanted to hold him and be held. He wanted to fall asleep listening to David''s light snoring.


    ¡°Fuck,¡± Louis said, knocking his forehead to the steering wheel before straightening up and starting the engine again.


    When he got home, Louis moved to the kitchen to do the cleanup, only to realize that Rosemarie had already done the dishes, including the glass that Louis had left on the edge of the sink to use later. He rolled his eyes, but just moved past it to see if the table needed to be wiped down or anything. It didn¡¯t, but Louis noticed the notebook that David had pulled out at dinner.


    Louis picked it up, flipping through the pages, too fast to read, but slow enough to see the neat rows of spiky script that filled the pages. There were a couple sketches, too, including the ones that he had done at the dinner table. Louis sighed and put the notebook on the side table. He would have to bring it to David tomorrow.


    By the time he finished, it was just after midnight. Though Louis'' body was tired, his mind didn''t seem ready to shut off. He flopped down on the couch and stared at the grandfather clock on the opposite side of the room. It ticked solemnly in the dark.


    The notebook kept catching his eye, too. After a while, he heard quiet footsteps coming from Rosemarie''s room. Louis looked guiltily away from the notebook even though he hadn¡¯t read a thing in it.


    ¡°Sorry, did I wake you?¡± Louis asked, scooting over so that Rosemarie could come sit beside him. She curled her feet under her and leaned over against Louis''s shoulder.


    "No," she said. "Couldn''t sleep."


    "Me neither."


    They sat there in the dark for a long time, just listening to the ticking of the clock and the sound of crickets outside. Louis slowly began to relax until he thought he might be able to drift off if he closed his eyes.


    ¡°Lou, we need to talk,¡± Rosemarie said.


    Louis felt like his heart stopped. His first reaction was to shut her down and tell her that there was nothing to talk about. Not with her voice in that tone. But the other part of him knew that they did need to talk, and that she deserved to talk about whatever she needed to, whether he was ready to hear it or not.


    ¡°What about?¡± he asked, though he could feel the sting of tears building behind his eyes.


    Rosemarie took his hand and threaded their fingers together. It had been ages since he had held hands with anyone but David. He couldn¡¯t help but think how well his sister¡¯s hand fit in his. With David it was always a battle of which thumb went on top when their fingers intertwined. But Rosemarie¡¯s hand fit naturally in his, so small and soft.


    ¡°About what happens when I¡¯m gone,¡± she said.


    Louis tried to say something, but couldn¡¯t quite force his voice past the lump in his throat.


    ¡°I know you don¡¯t want to talk about it," she said, then laughed. "I don¡¯t either, but..." She stopped for a moment and Louis wondered if she was as near tears as he was. "It¡¯s getting close.¡±


    ¡°Don¡¯t say that,¡± Louis pleaded, voice cracking in the middle.


    Rosemarie pressed a kiss to his shoulder and Louis squeezed her hand.


    ¡°We both know it¡¯s true,¡± she said.


    How was her voice so calm and steady when he felt like the world was splitting at the seams?


    ¡°After I¡¯m gone, there are things that need to be attended to. I don¡¯t want to leave you alone.¡±


    ¡°I¡¯m not alone,¡± Louis said, though the words felt like a lie in his mouth. It wasn¡¯t that he didn¡¯t have people he could turn to. He knew he did, logically, but he didn¡¯t feel like there was anyone just now.


    ¡°You aren¡¯t alone,¡± Rosemarie affirmed, as though that wasn¡¯t what he had just told her. ¡°You have Avery and you have David, and I¡¯m sure there are other people, too, if you¡¯d ask for help.¡±


    ¡°I don¡¯t want help,¡± Louis said, squeezing her hand a little too hard.


    ¡°All the legal documents have been prepared and you have my lawyer¡¯s number,¡± she said. ¡°You should have everything you need. My finances are in order, barring any unforeseen circumstances, at least. I¡¯ve left everything in the drawer beside my bed, just check in there after I¡¯m gone. I want this to be as easy on you as possible.¡±


    ¡°Easy on me?¡± Louis let out a harsh laugh. ¡°You shouldn¡¯t have to deal with all of this, either.¡±


    ¡°Hush,¡± she said, wrapping her other hand around his arm in a soft embrace. ¡°Let me take care of you, Lou.¡±


    ¡°I¡¯m sorry,¡± he said.


    ¡°So am I,¡± she whispered.


    They sat in the dark for a long time. Long enough that Louis heard Rosemarie¡¯s breathing even out into sleep. Sleep didn''t come for him, though.


    In the morning he would have to wake up just like every other morning and go to work with the full knowledge that every time he said goodbye might be the last time.


    He briefly considered calling Nabila to tender his resignation, but he didn¡¯t think Rosemarie would approve of that. In fact, she would insist on him going back and continuing to live, even while the world ended. She would insist that he keep doing what he loved and live his life the same way he would have to when she was gone.


    He didn¡¯t have the heart to tell her that he didn¡¯t know how to keep going without her.


    Louis couldn¡¯t stop the tears that streaked down his face as he stared silently up at the ceiling.


    ¡°Rosemarie,¡± Louis whispered after he finally managed to compose himself. ¡°You should get to bed.¡±


    He shook her shoulder, but she didn¡¯t respond. Louis''s jolted with panic and he jostled her a little more harshly.


    Finally, Rosemarie lifted her head slowly and Louis tried to steady his breathing. If Rosemarie noticed, she didn¡¯t say anything, just squeezed his arm and got up off the couch.


    Louis walked her to her bedroom and watched her climb under the covers. He bid her goodnight before forcing himself to leave. It seemed that his feet could take him no farther from her than the living room, though, so he took up residence on the couch again. Louis curled up under a throw blanket and watched the clock tick closer to morning.


    He should sleep. Time didn¡¯t stop just because your sister was dying, or because you were falling in love with a man you were destined to part from. And self-pity certainly didn¡¯t help anyone.


    None of that made Louis''s mind any more inclined to rest, though.


    Louis lay in the dark until the clock chimed three. Louis sighed and gave up trying to sleep. He clicked the light on, thinking that he might try revising his lines so that he was at least productive in his insomnia.


    As he leaned over, though, his eyes caught on the notebook again.


    He shouldn''t look. It was a blatant invasion of David''s privacy. If David wanted him to read it, he would have said so. But his hand reached for the notebook anyway.


    Louis ran his fingers along the spine. It was just a generic black journal, nothing particularly special, but when he flipped through the pages, the scent of David¡¯s cologne wafted up to him. Louis closed his eyes and lifted the notebook to his mouth, as though pressing a kiss to the cover and inhaled. The scent was comforting even as it ached inside him.


    Louis flipped the cover open. In¡ªrelatively¡ªneat scrawl were David¡¯s name and what must have been his address in Weldstone Harbor. There was a phone number scribbled under it, too, though it was not the one David had now. He wondered how long he''d had this notebook. Louis flipped to the first page, just to see if there was a date, but his eyes caught on the title.


    Louis''s curiosity utterly overwhelmed his sense of propriety, then.


    He read that page, then the next. By the time he had the conscience to feel guilty, he was already finished with the book. Louis closed the journal and stared at the little book.


    Louis was no a judge of poetry or music, but he felt that there were more good poems in the book than there were bad. And, regardless of their quality, Louis found that he liked each and every one of them.


    He wondered which of them were merely poems and which of them belonged to the chords and musical notation scrawled on other pages.


    He ached to hear David sing them. All of them.


    But, somehow, he doubted David ever intended to share that and Louis had absolutely no right to ask it, either. It didn''t stop the wanting, though.


    Louis rubbed a hand over his face. He wished once again that he could remember what exactly he''d written in response to the letter David sent. He wished that he''d been kinder, regardless.


    Louis was still a little surprised that his words or opinions could hold that much weight with anyone. That he did. And it made him a bit sick to think he''d said something that had hurt David when David''s smiles were about the only thing keeping him going any more.


    Louis let out a shaky breath.


    Maybe it was time to own up to it and take responsibility. To apologize¡ªeven if it meant admitting everything about the letter and the song and the notebook. Even if it ended in heartbreak. David deserved some kind of closure on it and the knowledge had started to feel more and more like a lie as time went on.


    And, in the end, he loved David too much to deny him the truth. The whole truth, past and present.


    With a dead-man¡¯s resolve, Louis crept over to the bookshelf, clicking on the little side lamp so he could find the album he needed. He pulled it out and flipped through the pages until he found the letter and the song.


    He couldn''t help but smile as he pulled them out. They really were terrible. Some of the lines didn''t even form complete sentences.


    Louis sat down at Rosemarie''s desk and answered the letter how he wished he''d answered it to begin with. When he was finished, he sealed the envelope with shaking hands and tucked it into the front of the notebook. Louis then set the notebook beside his briefcase so he remembered to return it to David tomorrow.

 Chapter Twenty

    ¡°Morning,¡± David called when he spotted Louis getting out of his car.


    Louis nodded, though he didn¡¯t actually respond. He looked exhausted. His eyes were shadowed and his face a little paler than usual¡ªmaking him appear just shy of the shade of a piece of paper.


    ¡°Did you sleep at all last night?¡± David couldn¡¯t help but ask as Louis approached.


    Louis just shrugged, then yawned. ¡°Maybe an hour,¡± he said.


    David tried not to read too much into that. ¡°Is everything okay?¡± he asked slowly.


    ¡°She¡¯s fine,¡± Louis said.


    That was a relief, but it certainly didn¡¯t change the fact that Louis looked like a zombie extra right now. David hesitated for a moment, before reaching up to squeeze Louis''s elbow. ¡°Are you okay?¡±


    Louis gave him a flat glance. And, yeah, maybe that was a stupid question, but Louis hadn¡¯t really been okay since David met him. That didn¡¯t usually cause him to lose sleep.


    ¡°I¡¯m fine,¡± Louis said, nudging David¡¯s shoulder with a hand to direct him toward the studio. David wanted to protest, but pushing him didn¡¯t seem like the right course of action, either.


    ¡°You excited for any of the scenes today?¡± he asked instead, grinning because he knew that Louis had a sequence wherein he was almost entirely absent, replaced by his stunt double.


    ¡°No,¡± Louis said, dully.


    David snorted and bumped their shoulders together.


    ¡°Maybe you should take a nap when you aren¡¯t needed,¡± he said, though he knew that Louis wouldn''t. He never fell asleep around other people. David had called it paranoia when Louis told him that, but Louis had referred to it as common courtesy with a rather judgmental look.


    ¡°In the unlikely event that I¡¯m not needed, I have better things to do than sleep.¡±


    ¡°You say that, but you look a bit like the living dead. Are you sure you¡¯re all right?¡±


    Louis pinched the bridge of his nose between thumb and forefinger. David wondered if it was because he kept asking if he was all right, or if it was really because he wasn¡¯t actually all right.


    ¡°David, stop worrying,¡± Louis said. ¡°Sometimes I can¡¯t sleep. It¡¯s not a big deal.¡±


    David didn''t buy that, but he couldn''t exactly refute it, either.


    ¡°What do you have today?¡± Louis asked, though David was pretty sure it was just to change the subject. Louis always knew David¡¯s schedule.


    ¡°Shooting a bad-ass action sequence with myself and a couple werewolves,¡± David lied.


    ¡°You are not,¡± Louis said. ¡°You have a romance sub-plot and a detective scene.¡±


    David grinned.


    ¡°Why ask questions you already know the answer to?¡± David said. "Do you like hearing the sound of my voice that much?"


    He wanted to slip his hand around Louis''s, but he knew that Louis would not appreciate the gesture as they walked into work. Instead, he just knocked their shoulders together again, stepping a little closer.


    To his surprise, Louis swung his arm around him to rest on David¡¯s shoulders. It made walking a little awkward, but David didn¡¯t have the resolve to knock the arm away. The hand lingered even when they came to a stop in front of David¡¯s trailer.


    As much as it made a warm fuzzy feeling curl up inside of David like a contented cat, it was worrying. Something was off this morning, no matter what Louis said. Really off.


    ¡°Wanna come in for a minute?¡± David asked. They still had some time before they had to start getting ready.


    Louis hesitated for a moment, looking a bit like a man walking to the gallows. David frowned wondering what that look could possibly be about.


    ¡°Yeah, I need to talk to you, actually,¡± Louis said.


    David¡¯s stomach filled with dread. Oh. Oh, no.


    ¡°Why?¡± David asked, still standing in front of the door to his trailer as though he could keep away the bad news by stopping them from going inside.


    ¡°In private,¡± Louis said. ¡°You¡¯re going to be upset with me.¡±


    David was going to be upset? With Louis?


    That didn¡¯t sound like he was breaking up with him. It sounded more like Louis had done something wrong, though David couldn¡¯t for the life of him think what.


    Unless he had cheated? But they had just seen each other last night, and, unless Louis had driven two towns over to find an open bar, that didn''t seem likely. Except, Louis did look like he hadn¡¯t slept at all.


    ¡°David, the door,¡± Louis prompted.


    David almost told him that he didn¡¯t want to know, that he¡¯d rather just ignore that anything might have happened and continue on as they had been, but he supposed he really should hear what Louis had to say.


    Feeling as wary as Louis looked, David opened the door and stepped into his trailer. Louis followed, closing the shitty plastic door behind them for the illusion of privacy.


    ¡°You left this at my place last night,¡± Louis said, setting down his briefcase on the little dinette and pulling something out.


    David¡¯s eyes widened as he saw the faux leather journal that he brought last night in an attempt to find the courage to show Rosemarie.


    ¡°Uh, thanks,¡± David said, reaching out for it.


    Louis didn¡¯t hand it over, instead holding it to his chest, like it was some sort of contraband that David was confiscating.


    ¡°I read it,¡± Louis said quickly.


    David blinked. ¡°What?¡±


    ¡°I read it. I knew I shouldn¡¯t and I read it anyway.¡±


    David just stared at him, brows furrowed. He was having trouble computing what Louis was saying.


    Louis, the guy who hated any sort of public attention and invasion of privacy, was saying that he had read through David¡¯s notebook without permission.


    ¡°I¡¯m sorry,¡± Louis said. ¡°I know I shouldn¡¯t have. I didn¡¯t really mean to, it just sort of happened.¡±


    ¡°Oh, it just happened?¡± David snapped, feeling exposed and betrayed. ¡°You can¡¯t accidentally read through someone else¡¯s notebook, Louis! It¡¯s not like your eyes slipped over one hundred odd pages!¡±


    ¡°You''re right. I¡¯m sorry,¡± he repeated.


    And, sure, he looked sorry now, but that didn¡¯t stop the fact that he had read the damn thing.


    The worst part was that it was partially David¡¯s fault, anyway. He shouldn¡¯t have brought it, but he¡¯d been trying to find the courage to share it with Rosemarie. Not that he¡¯d succeeded.


    David closed his eyes and took a deep breath.


    ¡°Fine, whatever,¡± David said holding out his hand for the book.


    Louis didn''t move, just looked at him with an almost childish reluctance in his eyes. For once, David found it irritating more than endearing.


    ¡°Can I have it back now?¡± he prompted after a moment.


    Louis handed it over slowly and still looking like he¡¯d rather be doing anything else. David snatched it away and stuffed it in his back pocket.


    He was such an idiot.


    He could feel his face heating at the thought of Louis reading through the poems in there. It wasn''t like Louis would realize that David once wrote a stupid song for him from anything in the book¡ªit wasn''t like Louis even remembered! They weren''t even in the double digits at that point!


    They were both adults now and it was absurd to be so caught up on the words of a little kid he hadn''t even known.


    He did know Louis now. There was so much they''d built together and so much that David had started to want from him, too. It was almost too much. He trusted Louis. He trusted Louis more than he trusted pretty much anyone.


    But David''s body didn''t seem to care about any of that.


    His heart was already speeding and a cold sweat prickled the back of his neck. The idea of hearing anything Louis had to say about the contents of his notebook made him want to flee the country.


    David didn¡¯t know how to cope with the dichotomy of the two feelings, the desire and the fear.


    If he really loved Louis, why couldn¡¯t he share this part of himself with him?


    ¡°I know I shouldn¡¯t have read it,¡± Louis said softly. ¡°That was inexcusable and an invasion of your privacy. I truly am sorry."


    "But?" David asked because there was a but hanging at the end of the sentence even if Louis didn''t have the gall to say it.


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    Louis glanced at the door as though to make sure they were alone. "But I don''t understand. Why are you so recalcitrant about your music?"


    He¡¯d recognized what the poems were, then. David flushed which only made him angrier. "Does it matter? Do I need to share it with you?"


    Louis looked like he wanted to say something to that, but, finally, he just sighed. "You''re right; you don''t. I won''t mention it again."


    "Good, then if you''ll excuse me," David said, waving a hand toward the door.


    Louis hesitated for a split second before nodding again and leaving the trailer.


    *****


    The rest of the day went without a hitch, if only because David managed to force himself so far behind the persona of Marcus Lazarus that he didn¡¯t have to even think of Louis.


    When the end of the day came around, though, David bolted for the door, trying to make it to Jennifer¡¯s car before Louis had a chance to talk to him again.


    ¡°David, wait! Please don¡¯t ignore me,¡± Louis called, actually sprinting to catch up with him.


    David stopped, reluctantly turning back to face him. Frankly, he still looked miserable and exhausted and remorseful and it made it really hard to be angry with him.


    ¡°I¡¯m not ignoring you,¡± David said. ¡°I am angry with you.¡±


    ¡°I know,¡± Louis said. ¡°I know you¡¯re angry, and you have every right to be, but just...¡± He broke off with a frustrated sigh. ¡°Actually, I don''t even know what I''m trying to say. I know how upset I would be if our positions were reversed. I am sorry¡ªfor that, and for this. I''m clearly not thinking straight. I''ll see you tomorrow.¡± Louis stepped back, as though to release David and uncharacteristically scrubbed a hand through his hair.


    The gesture made it stand ridiculously on end and David stuffed his hand in his pocket to stop himself from reaching up to smooth it back down.


    David stood there, frowning at Louis until he fidgeted, just a little, shifting from one foot to the other.


    He was still angry, but it wasn¡¯t as sharp as it had been that morning. David just maybe¡ªokay, probably¡ªwould have done the same. David was the cat and curiosity was his fatal flaw. And Jennifer, on multiple occasions, had done the same. It just felt different with Louis. Dangerous, somehow, in a way that it wasn''t with Jennifer.


    But, David wasn''t sure Louis deserved that, either. It was probably just David''s insecurities rearing their evil heads again.


    ¡°I can forgive you for the journal,¡± David said. ¡°Just give me a night to get over it. And ask next time.¡±


    The look of utter relief on Louis''s face was almost comical if it hadn''t been so tinged with exhaustion. Seriously, had the man even gotten an hour''s sleep? David finally gave into the impulse to smooth a hand over Louis''s hair, fixing the strands he''d displaced, then giving his shoulder a squeeze.


    Once he had, he gave into the further impulse to press a chaste kiss to Louis''s lips, liking the way that Louis''s shoulder relaxed against his palm, leaning into him.


    Even upset, that was still nice. When David pulled away, though, Louis''s expression went tense again. He looked stressed. Of course he was stressed, though. Maybe it was the exhaustion cracking his mask, but he looked a bit like he was hanging off the edge of a cliff without a parachute.


    ¡°You should get some sleep,¡± David said, his thumb playing over the seam of Louis''s collar.


    ¡°I will as soon as I get home,¡± he said with a genuine smile.


    David frowned. ¡°Are you okay to drive?¡± he asked. It wasn¡¯t like it was an incredibly long drive to Louis''s house, but it was a good twenty-five minutes during rush hour¡ªall farmers seemed to drive ten miles-per-hour below the speed limit except for when you were in front of them going ten over with a double yellow line.


    ¡°If I¡¯m too tired, I¡¯ll pull over,¡± Louis assured him. "Or, I''ll call a cab. Don''t worry."


    David would worry, though, so he reached out and plucked the keys from Louis''s grip. It seemed to take him a moment to register what happened, so David felt assured that this was the correct choice.


    ¡°I¡¯ll drive you home, actually,¡± David said, giving him a cheeky smile. ¡°No drowsy driving.¡±


    Louis looked like he wanted to protest, but he must have actually been too tired to drive, because when David grabbed his hand to pull him towards the car, he followed without a word.


    ¡°Okay, I know this is not going to inspire confidence,¡± David said once he had sat down, adjusting the mirrors a little so he could see, ¡°but, uh, how do you turn on your car, again? I had to look it up last time I drove.¡±


    Louis snorted and pointed to the big round button labeled "On/Off", which David thought was a little on the nose. He stuck his tongue out at Louis and felt that maybe things really were going to be okay after all.


    Just as long as David figured out how to forget about the embarrassment of his youth.


    That shouldn¡¯t be hard. It wasn¡¯t like he¡¯d been obsessing over that letter for close to twenty years.


    ¡°Foot on the break, press the power button,¡± Louis prompted when David didn''t immediately move to start the car. He pointed out the gear shift and parking button, then leaned back in his seat and closed his eyes.


    David didn''t turn the music on or try to start a conversation, just listened to the quiet sound of Louis''s breathing as he stewed in his own thoughts.


    If it hadn''t been that journal, David thought he could have laughed it off, filing it away as a teasing rebuke when he wanted to get his way later on, but it was that journal. The one with parts of David that he kept safe from everyone but Jennifer.


    And now Louis.


    What did Louis even want with it? Did he really just want to hear David sing again? Or for David to play for Rosemarie? Or was it just because David didn''t want to talk about it? Was it one of those too-close conversations born of Louis''s insatiable desire to pick things apart until he understood them?


    Even the thought of the latter made David feel a bit raw. He loved that intensity about Louis, but sometimes he wished it wasn''t directed at him so often.


    David pulled into the driveway at Rosemarie''s house, but couldn¡¯t figure out which button opened the garage, so he just put it in park and turned the car off.


    Louis didn''t even stir so David took a moment to study him. His arms were crossed over his chest and his mouth was soft, lips parted just slightly. The five-o-clock shadow he always sported by the evening was stark against his pale skin, as though tempting David to run his hand over Louis''s cheek. He didn¡¯t snore, but his breath hitched unevenly every couple inhales.


    David realized that he had never actually seen Louis asleep before, even when they had slept together. Maybe he really was a vampire. David chuckled at the thought. He reached out and stroked a finger over the shell of Louis''s ear. Louis sat up with a sharp inhale, looking around until his eyes caught on David.


    ¡°Sorry, didn¡¯t mean to startle you,¡± David said. ¡°We¡¯re here.¡±


    Louis nodded. ¡°Thanks for driving,¡± he said. ¡°I must have been more tired than I thought.¡±


    ¡°You want me to pull it into the garage?¡±


    Louis paused, then looked over at him. ¡°I¡¯m sorry, I didn¡¯t even think of how you were going to get home.¡±


    ¡°Oh, I was going to call a cab or something. Maybe see if Jennifer is feeling generous today.¡± She wouldn¡¯t be. He''d forgotten to text her before they left, so he''d sort of abandoned her after begging for a ride at lunch. Hopefully, she had figured out he¡¯d disappeared on her own via GPS.


    ¡°Take the car,¡± Louis said. ¡°You can pick me up in the morning, or I can call for a ride.¡±


    He looked over at David with that expression he''d been wearing all day that made David''s heart pound with anxiety but which he couldn''t decipher past feeling like something was wrong. David nodded, still leaned over the center console. Louis''s eyes dipped to David''s lips and he leaned in a little, pausing to ask David''s silent permission before pressing an uncharacteristically desperate kiss to his lips.


    David always liked kissing Louis, but there was something about that kiss that settled in his stomach with a leaden weight.


    ¡°Louis, what¡¯s wrong?¡± he asked when Louis drew away.


    ¡°Nothing, I¡¯m just tired.¡± It was a lie, but David didn¡¯t know how to insist that Louis tell him when he''d just told Louis to mind his own business about David''s feelings.


    Instead, he cupped Louis''s jaw and kissed him again.


    ¡°I¡¯ll be here in the morning,¡± he whispered, then let Louis go¡ªwhich was surprisingly difficult. He was sort of tempted to follow him into the house and tuck him into bed. Possibly to tuck himself into bed alongside him.


    ¡°David,¡± Louis said, pausing with one leg out the door, his expression too serious for David''s comfort, "I know my timing is terrible, but... I think we need to talk tomorrow. About us. I think it''s time to decide where this is going.¡±


    David¡¯s heart plummeted. That sounded an awful lot like an ultimatum.


    Was this what he''d been trying to say all day? It was probably a long time coming, honestly. Maybe since the night they got back from Weldstone Harbor. Maybe that was why he''d been... distant wasn''t the right word, but certainly not as interested as David had expected.


    David had been under the impression that things had been going well, at least until recently. But, come to think of it, that had all started after that night, hadn''t it? Louis must have realized what he''d gotten himself into.


    David hadn''t thought to wonder about it before, but now he could''t help but consider that maybe he had failed to satisfy Louis sexually.


    Were the arguments just a pretext? He didn''t think Louis would do something like that, but Louis wasn''t exactly an open book. How well did he really know him?


    Louis might have been trying to give David an excuse to end it. He may have even thought that that would be easier on David than breaking up with him.


    David stared for a moment longer, trying to come up with some kind of response that would clarify everything, but, in the end, all he could do was nod and watch as Louis disappeared into the house.


    David drove back to the B&B, parking the car outside. It felt wrong for it to be here without Louis, David thought a little numbly.


    Louis wanted David to make a choice.


    David didn¡¯t want to make one.


    David especially did not want to make one when he was still upset about the damn notebook.


    But, if Louis didn''t want David to make an emotionally driven decision, then why ask now?


    David tugged the offending journal from his pocket and flung it across the room to see if that made him feel any better. It didn''t.


    The journal hit the wall, bouncing off it and sliding under the bed. David didn¡¯t bother retrieving it, flopping down on the squeaky mattress instead and covering his face with a frilly pillow.


    Louis wanted to talk about them tomorrow.


    Louis wanted to talk about where this was going tomorrow.


    David didn''t even know where he wanted it to go. He liked what was between them already. He liked hanging out with Louis and kissing him and sleeping with him.


    Did Louis like all that? He was much more experienced with sex than David. Was David satisfying in bed? Was David satisfying out of bed?


    They were friends, so he must get something out of their relationship, but friendship and romance weren''t the same. But David truly did think Louis wanted to be with him. He''d kissed him less than an hour ago! But he also hadn''t tried to go further and he''d refused every invitation David had given to stay over since that night, too.


    David pressed the sunflower pillow more firmly over his face. The pillowcase had been washed since Louis spent the night, but if he closed his eyes he could still imagine his scent there. He could practically feel the warmth he¡¯d felt the morning after with Louis still resting beside him, arm propped up as he read one of David¡¯s books with those ridiculously thick glasses perched on his nose.


    David wanted that again.


    But even if he wanted that and even if Louis wanted it, there was still the looming question of the future.


    Louis didn''t want to stay on Night Mist. The only reason he was here was because he needed to be here with Rosemarie.


    Because she was dying.


    The knowledge had set up residence as a permanent ache in David¡¯s chest. He couldn¡¯t even imagine what Louis and Rosemarie were going through.


    Selfishly, David wanted Louis. He wanted to be around him, to kiss him, to touch him, to have his thoughts and his feelings spread out before him and nobody else. But he wasn''t sure if that was enough.


    He wanted to be there for Louis, too, through the things that might come and the things that were coming.


    But David wanted things for himself, too.


    What could he do from Midtown if, no, when Louis returned to Weldstone Harbor?


    He could follow him, he supposed, but if he did, that would mean returning his career to exactly where it had been before he left. The only reason to go was that Louis made him happy. But he was afraid that if he made a decision based just on that, he was going to end up resenting it. Maybe even resenting Louis. Louis made him happy, but that didn''t necessarily mean it wasn''t a destructive happiness.


    So where did that leave them?


    David promised Rosemarie that he would look after Louis when she was gone. At this rate, David honestly didn¡¯t know if he could keep that promise. Could this work if their paths diverged the way it seemed like they would?


    Maybe it was better to end this all now, before they got any more tangled up with each other.


    David flung the pillow to the side and stared at the patterns on the ceiling.


    Louis had promised that they would still be friends when it ended, and Rosemarie seemed to think that that was what Louis needed anyway. A friend. Someone who didn¡¯t have expectations of something more or ask that he compromise his own happiness while he figured himself out.


    ¡°You¡¯re leaving anyway, aren¡¯t you?¡± David muttered to the empty air.


    Because Louis didn¡¯t like small towns or small productions.


    David, it turned out, did. He had never felt happier or more fulfilled than he had working on Night Mist and he didn''t want to give that up. He didn''t want to give it up, even for Louis.


    Didn''t that mean that he didn''t love him enough? Wasn''t that proof right there that David and Louis could only go so far together?


    David pressed his palms into his eyes until he saw stars.

 Chapter Twenty-One

    Louis was a fool. Clearly, he''d been too sleep-deprived to make important decisions, but it was too late to un-make them now, so he was stuck with the looming presence of the talk. The talk that he, in his infinite wisdom, had requested.


    He almost wished that David had taken a cab last night just to put off the inevitable for a little longer. Maybe he''d forgotten about it. Maybe they could just pretend that Louis hadn''t brought it up. Louis felt like his organs had turned to lead as he stood at the end of the driveway waiting for David.


    When he heard the near silent purr of his car, he glanced up from his phone, but couldn''t see David''s expression through the glare on the windshield from the street lamp. He stepped back as David pulled the car into the drive and climbed out.


    He wanted to smile and pretend that he hadn''t put the nails in the coffin of their relationship himself, but his mouth wasn''t cooperating so he just nodded.


    "Good morning," Louis said, his voice too rough even for this early in the morning.


    "G''morning," David said, giving him a small smile that wasn''t all there.


    David switched sides of the car to climb into the passenger''s seat and Louis got behind the wheel. The silence was deafening as he backed out of the driveway, but before he could flip on the radio just to distract himself from the tension, David cleared his throat.


    With an ominous clarity, Louis saw exactly how the rest of the drive would pan out.


    ¡°I thought about what you said," David started.


    "About what I said?" Louis asked slowly, his stomach tying itself into knots as he thought about the letter tucked into the front of David''s notebook, sticking out a good half-inch so it couldn''t be missed. He almost hoped David hadn''t read it, that things could just keep going on as they had been. Louis stole a glance at David, but his face was oddly expressionless as looked straight ahead out the windshield.


    "Yeah. About my notebook and about what was in my notebook. And everything else, too. Everything between us. I mean, I thought a lot. I basically spent the entire night thinking about it all," David admitted.


    So he had seen the letter. Louis''s hands tightened on the steering wheel, heart speeding until he thought he might be having a minor panic attack. That expression didn''t seem promising. Louis forced himself to take deep, even breaths.


    ¡°There¡¯s a lot, isn¡¯t there?¡± Louis said slowly.


    He hadn''t stopped thinking either. About Rosemarie, about David, about Night Mist and Weldstone Harbor, and about everything else.


    He thought himself in circles, certain that if he just processed it a little more, he could start untangling it and finding some way forward that didn''t hurt to consider.


    "There''s a bit," David said slowly. He was quiet for a moment and Louis wondered if he was waiting for him to make some sort of argument or statement. But he didn''t know what else to say. He had nothing else to give except what he''d lain out in his letter. The rest was David''s to decide.


    "What¡ª" Louis cleared his throat, and tried again. "What did you decide?"


    ¡°I''m sorry, Louis. I think I need some time,¡± David said, his voice soft. ¡°You''re important to me, but we don''t want the same things, do we? I don''t know if what I feel for you is enough to change everything else. It¡¯s too much, too fast, or something.¡±


    That hurt more than Louis had expected. Too much and not enough all at once. And still David sounded like he wasn''t sure about it. It was selfish, but Louis wanted more. He felt a little resentful, even, that David didn''t feel what he did. That David didn''t love him.


    It wasn''t fair, but Louis didn''t want to take a step back or to give David time or space. He didn''t need it. Everything that Louis had was already David''s.


    Including this choice.


    Louis swallowed, forcing down the emotion before he spoke.


    ¡°You want to break up,¡± Louis said.


    David flinched hard enough that Louis saw it even as he refused to look over at him. Louis couldn¡¯t find it in himself to spare him that, though. That was what he was asking for.


    ¡°You said from the beginning that this was only casual, experimenting,¡± David snapped.


    It was Louis''s turn to flinch, though he thought he hid it well. That was true. He had said something like that. At the time, he¡¯d even believed it.


    ¡°I did,¡± Louis forced himself to say. ¡°Nothing will change. I just wanted to be clear.¡±


    ¡°Good,¡± David said, though Louis knew it was obvious to both of them that that was a lie. Everything had already changed. They would try to repair this, build it up from the ground, but it was too late to go back to where they started.


    David was silent for a long moment. Louis couldn¡¯t bring himself to look at him. If he did, he thought he might park the car and do something stupid like beg for him to reconsider or tell him that they could figure it all out.


    But that wouldn''t be fair.


    "All right," Louis said, nodding as though that was the end of it.


    And it was. It was what he expected, but he still wished...


    No. It was too late for that. It seemed like whatever was between them was too much and not enough. At this point, Louis just hoped that they could retain their friendship.


    David hadn''t brought up anything in the letter, positive or negative, so, with luck, time would allow them both to sweep it under the rug.


    Right now, though, Louis just needed a moment to feel dead inside.


    Rosemarie would have scolded him for being dramatic, but it felt true enough. He didn''t feel very alive just then. Or maybe he felt too alive. It was like the little bits of him that had been fracturing since the beginning of the year had finally shattered, short circuiting everything into a steady numbness.


    *****


    David mostly avoided Louis for the rest of the day and ignored him when he couldn''t avoid him.


    You want to break up.


    No, actually, David did not want that.


    But apparently David''s worries had been right.


    Louis wanted to break things off, write their relationship off as failed experiment. For his part, David had hoped that they could talk about it for more than five minutes, at least. Discuss their plans for the future and what might come, but five minutes had really been all it took for Louis. Maybe he was just more rational. He''d probably already gone through all the pros and cons and decided that this was the only way forward.


    Not that David had come up with any alternatives himself.


    Still, it felt like it should have been worth more than a single sentence.


    That was the part that really stung. David had probably overestimated Louis''s attachment, maybe even their relationship in general, but he''d expected Louis to feel something. He was pretty sure his hurt was written clearly across his own face.


    Hence the avoidance.


    But he also needed to talk about it with someone, even if it wasn''t with Louis. He didn''t think he could get over the strangling knot in his stomach or the inkling of resentment without it. He needed to talk to Jennifer. Maybe he could drag her out for a drink after work. She could listen to his pros and cons¡ªwhich were pretty simple. Pros: I love him. Cons: The universe is conspiring against us.¡ªthen tell him to give it up.


    He should remember his time with a movie star as a beautiful dream to look back on fondly and a story to tell his grandchildren.


    Except, David was having a hard time imagining a future¡ªmuch less grandchildren¡ªthat wasn''t Louis''s as much as it was his, which was absurd. They had never even talked about moving in together let alone kids. David''s what-ifs were spiraling into delusion. Besides, it was too late to wonder about any of that now.


    At least they were still friends. Louis had promised that nothing would change. David was less sure, but even if they had to start over from square one, David wasn''t ready to let go of him entirely.


    In the name of everything being most assuredly Fine, David sent Louis a quick text sharing a silly dog picture, then told him that they should practice their lines over lunch tomorrow. He congratulated himself on constructing a message that was both friendly and professional and didn¡¯t leave any room to be misconstrued as David trying to pull Louis back into a relationship he didn¡¯t want to be in. It was friendly. Safe. A good place to start.


    Pressing send was physically painful.


    "David," whispered an ominous voice from right behind his shoulder. David nearly jumped out of his skin as he whipped around, stuffing his phone in his pocket.


    "Jennifer, you scared the crap out of me," he said, putting a hand over his thundering heart.


    ¡°I know this is not our MO," she said without preamble, "but right now, I need a stiff drink, and you¡¯re the only person here who can drink me under the table.¡±


    ¡°Sorry, what?¡± David asked, staring wide-eyed at the alien who had clearly possessed Jennifer¡¯s body. They hadn¡¯t been out drinking since college. Mostly because they both turned into total freak shows when they got drunk and Jennifer had an image to maintain.


    ¡°I said, we are going to drink and I am going to spend the evening complaining to you, so whatever drama has you spacing out is going to have to wait for tomorrow,¡± she said with an icy glare.


    David nodded¡ªthere was really nothing else to do¡ªand followed her to her car without a word.


    Their drinking didn¡¯t end up being nearly as prolific as it had been in college since one or the other of them was going to have to drive them back. David played the DD this time and abstained, sipping a grapefruit soda as Jennifer made her way through what must have been half a bottle of vodka.


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    ¡°Are you going to tell me what happened?¡± David asked after a while.


    Jennifer glowered at him, her cheeks flushed with the alcohol, though she had yet to start dancing on the bar, which David took as a good sign.


    ¡°You were right,¡± Jennifer said, her tone deceptively even. David might not have known she was drunk if she hadn¡¯t started by almost complimenting him.


    ¡°I was right about what?¡±


    ¡°Nabila,¡± she said, pointing an accusing finger at him.


    David held up his hands in surrender, though he wasn¡¯t sure why he was surrendering yet.


    ¡°Sorry, still not following. Is something happening at work?¡±


    ¡°No!¡± Jennifer practically shouted. ¡°No, it¡¯s not at work. It¡¯s outside of work that there¡¯s a problem.¡±


    David tried to think of anything over the past couple months that might have gone wrong with Nabila, but couldn¡¯t come up with anything. He realized, rather guiltily, that he had actually not seen much of Jennifer since he and Louis got together. David was a terrible friend.


    ¡°I¡¯m in love with her,¡± Jennifer mumbled.


    David¡¯s eyes went wide and he choked on his mouthful of soda. ¡°Well, isn¡¯t that a good thing?¡±


    ¡°She turned me down.¡±


    ¡°Oh... shit,¡± David said, because what else was there to say, really?


    ¡°Yeah. Shit,¡± Jennifer agreed, resting her chin on a hand.


    David bumped her knee with his under the table. ¡°I guess a well-deserved night of drinking is in order, then,¡± he said, flagging down a waiter for another round.


    "Here''s to drowning your heartache in poor choices," David said, raising his bottle towards her with false cheer.


    Jennifer snorted, clinking her drink against his bottle and downing it in one go.


    *****


    It was far too late to be up on a work night by the time David managed to cart a half-asleep Jennifer back to her car. She was wearing his sweater so that, if she threw up, it was mostly on his things and not hers. He was a gentleman like that.


    A soft chime had David pulling out his phone even as he tried to squish his legs into a seat adjusted for someone with much, much shorter legs. By the time he found the lever to adjust his seat, he''d deciphered that the text was from Rosemarie.


    David frowned, taking a moment to read it as Jennifer slouched in her seat, bunching up the neck of David''s sweater to act as a pillow.


    I assume Louis is with you. Will you tell him to turn on his phone?


    David read it again, but the words didn''t change. His heart kicked up. It wasn¡¯t like Louis not to answer his phone. It was even less like Louis not to answer his phone when Rosemarie was trying to get in touch with him. Had something happened?


    ¡°Sorry, I need to answer this before we go,¡± David said to Jennifer who just grumbled something half-heartedly and twisted her feet up onto the seat to curl against the seatbelt like a child.


    David stepped out of the car, putting the keys in his pocket and dialed Rosemarie''s number. She picked up on the first ring.


    ¡°David,¡± she said, her tone irritated, ¡°can I talk to Louis?¡±


    ¡°That¡¯s why I called,¡± David admitted. ¡°I haven¡¯t seen Louis since we got off work. Did something happen? Are you all right?¡±


    ¡°I¡¯m fine,¡± she said, though her tone had turned from irritated to worried.


    David was a little worried, too. "You can''t get ahold of him?¡±


    "No," she said. "His phone is going straight to voicemail. I''m not sure if he''s ignoring me or if his phone is off. He didn''t mention any plans to you, did he?"


    "He didn''t," David said, trying to recall every word they''d said to one another that day.


    "I''m sure it''s nothing," she said, though David could hear the mirror of David''s own worry in her tone. It was late. What on earth could Louis be doing at this hour? Especially with his phone off.


    David bit his lip. ¡°I can try giving him a call,¡± he said hesitantly.


    If he wasn''t answering Rosemarie''s calls, David doubted Louis would answer his, but he wasn''t about to explain all of that to Rosemarie right now. For his own part, he needed to make sure that Louis was all right.


    ¡°I¡¯d appreciate that. If you get ahold of him, can you tell him to call me back?¡±


    ¡°Yeah, of course,¡± David said.


    David hung up then immediately pulled up Louis''s contact.


    The phone rang, then went to voicemail. David called again, just to make sure, but with the same result.


    A voice in the back of his head starting running through scenarios, wondering if Louis had died in a traffic accident or been kidnapped by a psychotic Starfly fan. He forced himself to calm down. That was unlikely. Someone would have called Rosemarie if he''d been in an accident. And he probably hadn''t been kidnapped.


    David tried the phone again.


    Heaving a frustrated sigh, David forced his thoughts from what ifs and pulled up their text log instead, shooting off a quick Where are you? Rosemarie is looking for you, then sending a follow-up text to Rosemarie before returning his phone to his pocket.


    He needed to get Jennifer home. If Louis hadn''t shown up by the time he was done, he would... well, he wasn''t going to think about that. Louis would turn up. He was probably just running errands. Or had a meeting he forgot to tell Rosemarie about.


    *****


    Louis had no destination in mind, but as soon as he''d climbed into his car after work, he''d known he wasn''t ready to go home. The car still smelled faintly of David''s aftershave, and he had the consuming need to get away from here. From his thoughts and from all the memories, good and bad.


    He needed to find somewhere neutral.


    For the first time in his life, Louis thought he understand the appeal of the oblivion of drink. Not that he would do that to Rosemarie. She had enough to worry about as it was, but he felt the urge just so that things would stop for a while. And that thought was terrifying.


    So, instead, he drove.


    He drove all the way to the city, then farther.


    David texted him a couple times after work. The first was an image of a dog and something inane about lines. Louis couldn''t bring himself to look at the rest of them, so he turned his phone off.


    He needed to think. Or not to think.


    The sky gradually darkened, but he kept driving, letting the passing lights and hum of the road numb out the loops playing in his mind.


    The gas light blinked on and Louis pulled off at a truck stop to fill the tank.


    He inhaled the scent of mountain air and gasoline, the scent grounding him enough to recognize that he needed to turn back now. If he didn''t, he wasn''t sure he ever would.


    The impulse was there again, to do something destructive, just to force the turmoil inside of him outside instead. But he''d already missed dinner with Rosemarie. And he had work tomorrow.


    She''d probably be asleep by now. He wondered briefly why she hadn''t called, but decided she must have turned in early. Another part of him whispered with what-ifs, but he forced them down.


    That cemented his resolve, though, and, when he pulled back onto the road, it was to head back to Midtown.


    The drive back seemed far too short. It was like all of the air was being sucked out of Louis lungs as he neared the house. Everything about this place felt claustrophobic and oppressive. And, now, even the thought of David weighted him with dread.


    This life was a double edged sword. When he left, he could continue with his life and goals in a place that didn''t feel like a dead end, but when he did, it would the definitive loss of everyone he loved.


    Louis pulled the car into the garage and shut it off, sitting there for a long while trying to collect himself. He wasn¡¯t hungry, but he went upstairs anyway, just in case Rosemarie left anything out that needed to be put away.


    ¡°Lou!¡± Rosemarie practically shouted when he finally wandered into the house. She was sitting on the couch, curled up beneath a blanket. When she saw him, her hand flew to her heart and she let out a harsh breath.


    "What?" Louis asked, alarmed as he rushed over to her side. "Are you all right?"


    ¡°Am I all right?" her tone had turned practically irate in that way that made Louis feel like he was a ten-year-old again. "Jesus, Louis, you scared me. Where have you been? I¡¯ve been calling you for three hours! Three hours! I called David and he said he hadn¡¯t seen you since you got off work.¡±


    Louis''s stomach clenched at the name. His drive was not nearly long enough.


    ¡°Sorry,¡± Louis said, raising his hands. ¡°I lost track of time. I just went... nowhere really. I was just driving.¡±


    ¡°Don¡¯t do that to me, Louis,¡± she said, pinching her forehead. ¡°You didn¡¯t even text me to say you wouldn¡¯t be home for dinner.¡±


    Louis pulled his phone out of his pocket and cursed at himself. He never left his phone off. What was wrong with him? What if something had happened and she couldn''t get ahold of him? ¡°I forgot my phone was off. Sorry.¡±


    She let out a long breath as he sat down beside her. "It''s not like you to be out so late on a work night."


    It was telling that she didn¡¯t even get up off the couch. Louis guiltily turned his phone back on only to receive about fifty notifications, both texts and calls, spanning the last several hours.


    ¡°Sorry,¡± he said again, leaning in to wrap an arm around her shoulders. ¡°I didn¡¯t mean to worry you.¡±


    ¡°Just don¡¯t do it again,¡± she said, reaching up to squeeze his hand. ¡°You haven¡¯t done that to me since you were sixteen. I thought you were dead.¡±


    Part of him wanted to say, ¡®Well, you¡¯d have seen me on the other side, in that case,¡¯ but he couldn¡¯t quite joke about it with her looking like she did. Her skin was waxy and pale, dripping off her bones like a candle in too much sunlight.


    ¡°And let David know you¡¯re all right,¡± she said. ¡°I think I worried him.¡±


    Louis looked at his phone and saw several messages from David, each one growing increasingly more panicked and his guilt increased, even as he was a little pleased that David cared that much.


    A new one popped up with, Jesus Christ, Louis, I swear to God, if you don¡¯t answer this, I¡¯m filing a missing person''s report and then stealing Jennifer¡¯s car to come look for you.


    Louis shot back a, Sorry, phone died. I¡¯m fine, before shutting it off again.


    Yes, he was a coward. And Rosemarie noticed it, giving him an odd look.


    ¡°What was that? Did you two have a fight?¡±


    Louis considered the question. Was it a fight? There were no raised voices, no pointing fingers, no fault on either side, really. A little coldness, perhaps, and he thought they''d both been avoiding each other over the course of the day, but nothing so... pronounced as a fight. Maybe it would have been better if they had. It might have felt more like a resolution that way.


    ¡°No,¡± he said slowly.


    Rosemarie¡¯s brow creased in the middle. ¡°Why your drive, then? What was so important you were missing for nearly five hours with your phone off?¡±


    ¡°I just needed to think,¡± Louis said.


    ¡°About?¡± Rosemarie¡¯s hand came to rest on Louis''s back, rubbing slow circles.


    ¡°About...¡± Louis tried to think of an appropriate answer, or at least one that he could put into words, before settling on an honest but vague, ¡°everything.¡±


    Rosemarie made a soft humming noise and her hand paused.


    ¡°I¡¯m dying, Lou,¡± she said. Louis tensed, but her hand started moving again, soothing him into compliance, even though he wished with everything that he was that she would stop bringing that up. ¡°I¡¯ve come to terms with it, you know? There are things that I wish I had done. Or things that I wish I''d done differently. But as it gets closer, Louis, the only thing I regret is leaving you."


    Louis''s jaw clenched and he swallowed, steadying himself. ¡°You could always burn me with you like the Vikings did with their most precious possessions,¡± Louis said, only half joking.


    ¡°Louis,¡± she scolded. Her hand moved up his back to play with his hair as she watched him.


    ¡°Sorry, you were saying?¡± Louis said when her attention became too much.


    ¡°I''m just saying that I love you more than anything,¡± Rosemarie said, her voice cracking. ¡°I wish I could have seen you grow up. That¡¯s one of the worst things, Louis. I wish that I could have seen you get married and have a family. I wanted to be a part of that, too.¡±


    Louis opened his mouth to tell her that marriage and kids weren¡¯t in the cards, at least not how she imagined it, but she shushed him before he could speak.


    ¡°Then I realized that what I really wanted was for you not to be alone. For you to be happy,¡± she said. ¡°Maybe things didn¡¯t happen quite how I had wanted them to, but that¡¯s my fault, not yours.¡±


    ¡°If you¡¯re implying that you raised me gay¡ª¡±


    ¡°Louis, stop being difficult and listen,¡± Rosemarie said, giving his hair a sharp tug. Louis glowered at her half-heartedly. ¡°I¡¯m saying that I¡¯m sorry.¡±


    ¡°I don''t understand,¡± Louis said.


    ¡°I¡¯m sorry for not accepting who you are,¡± she said. Her tone had gone soft, and there was an edge to it that was almost close to tears. "I''m sorry for not giving you what you needed from me."


    Louis looked over at her, feeling the world sliding out from under him.


    ¡°It¡¯s taken me this long to realize that you were happy,¡± she said, a tear actually trickling from the corner of her eye. ¡°It¡¯s taken me this long to realize that I¡¯ve stood in the way of that happiness since you were a little boy and..." her voice broke and it was a moment before she could speak again. "And, for that, I am so incredibly sorry. I know that it''s too late to make up for it now, but I want you to be happy, Louis.¡±


    ¡°Don¡¯t,¡± Louis rasped, feeling the tears trying to break free from his eyes, too. ¡°Don¡¯t say that now.¡±


    ¡°Louis, I am so proud of you. I love you more than anything in the world, and I love whoever loves you,¡± she said. ¡°I love whoever is good to you and makes you happy. That¡¯s all I want for you, Lou. I want you to be happy. It shouldn''t have taken me so long to recognize that everything that I wanted for you was already right there. I am glad that you found him, Lou.¡±


    Louis squeezed his eyes shut, elbows coming to rest on his knees. What he would have given to hear this all his life, to hear that she loved him anyway, that she wanted him to be happy, and she didn¡¯t mind if that happiness came from another man. But now it was like rubbing salt in a wound.


    ¡°I¡¯m sorry, Lou,¡± she said. ¡°I hope, someday, you can forgive me.¡±


    ¡°Thank you for saying that," Louis said, fighting to keep his tone even. "And I don¡¯t think there¡¯s anything I can¡¯t forgive you. It¡¯s fine. It''ll be fine."


    "Louis..."


    Louis shook his head, swallowing until he found his voice again. "It means a lot to me to hear you say that. But... about David. It doesn''t matter anymore. We broke up this morning."


    Rosemarie was quiet for a long moment and Louis chanced a glance over at her. Her expression was one of something almost like the grief Louis felt and it made his own throat constrict.


    ¡°Oh,¡± Rosemarie said, a hand stroking his hair. ¡°Oh, Lou.¡±


    Louis squeezed his eyes shut, but the tears escaped anyway. Rosemarie pulled him against her and he tucked his face into her neck like he used to when he was a child and cried. She continued stroking his back and hair, murmuring soothing words about how it was going to be okay.


    ¡°It¡¯s not, though,¡± Louis said. ¡°You know it¡¯s not.¡±


    ¡°Shhh,¡± was all she said.

 Chapter Twenty-Two

    They filmed through the winter with only a short break for the holidays¡ªwhich David had spent in Weldstone Harbor with his parents, diligently pretending that he didn''t miss Louis desperately¡ªand into the new year.


    Louis had kept his promise. They were definitely still friends, but even that was a pale imitation of what their friendship had been before. David felt like they had regressed to being work friends instead of actual friends, which made him unsure of how to behave around Louis anymore. He knew it only contributed to the distance between them, but he wasn''t sure how to change it, either.


    David had barely seen Rosemarie since the new year, either, though he''d seen her enough to feel a pang of dread every time Louis texted him.


    Not that Louis texted him that often.


    Louis wasn''t being outwardly hostile or anything¡ªhe wasn''t even really being cold¡ªbut David felt like he was walking on eggshells nonetheless. Like he was just another source of stress in Louis''s life instead of a shoulder to lean on. Neither of them seemed to be able to figure out where the line was anymore.


    It struck David as being supremely unfair, too, considering Louis was definitely more at fault for their breakup¡ªhe''d started it all by reading David''s journal and then been the one to dump David anyway.


    And, yet, David still sometimes wondered if he could ask Louis for another chance anyway.


    It had been a bad idea from the beginning and trying again wouldn''t change anything, really, but... he missed Louis. Not just as whatever unnamed thing they''d become¡ªthe thing David couldn''t name which sat in his chest like a lead weight¡ªbut as a friend, too.


    "All right, enough is enough," Jennifer said at lunch on the Tuesday after David had spent Valentine''s Day moping in her rental¡ªwhich was much bigger than David''s room at the B&B, but he was beginning to think of that place as home.


    "Enough what?" David asked, feigning ignorance. She''d caught him watching Louis who was speaking with Nabila across the room. David''s eyes skittered away when Louis glanced their way, but he regretted it as he met Jennifer''s gaze instead.


    "Either go tell him you still want to be together or get over him."


    David scoffed. "I''m over him."


    "As opposed to a couple days ago?" Jennifer asked dryly.


    "Valentine''s Day is supposed to be depressing when you are single," he informed her. "I was being companionable and supportive of my best friend who is also single. It has nothing to do with Louis."


    Jennifer reached forward and David flinched, though she didn''t flick him on the head like he expected¡ªprobably didn''t want to re-do his makeup¡ªjust grinning evilly at him instead.


    "Then why didn''t you spend it with Louis? I hear he, your other friend, is also single."


    "Shut up," David said, examining his lunch with more philosophical than practical interest.


    "Spill," she said.


    "My water? No thanks, I''m drinking it," he said, though the delivery was off.


    "Your guts," she said, "unless you''d like me to do it for you?" She held up a plastic knife and David stuck his tongue out at her, even as his gaze drifted back over to Louis.


    "I don''t know what you want from me," David said. "There''s nothing more to say."


    "It has been months and you are still acting all pathetic. Are you still upset with him about the journal?"


    David took a bite of his tostada to stall for time, but she simply raised an expectant brow. David shrugged.


    "I don''t know. Maybe. Yes. But that''s not the salient point."


    Jennifer pursed her lips, studying him for a moment.


    "Then what is?"


    "We broke up, it''s pretty simple. What does the journal matter?"


    "I''m trying to figure out why you''re still avoiding him," Jennifer said, as though he was the one being stubborn.


    "I''m not avoiding him," David said, surprised. He actually felt he was pestering him more than he should.


    "You are. And, while that was rude of him and I''m not against punishing boyfriends for their bad behavior," she said almost neutrally, "I can''t figure out why you care so much this time. I have also read your journal and you only put up a perfunctory protest about that. So did something else happen that I''m missing?"


    "Nothing happened. Besides, it''s not the same," David said. And it really wasn''t. "You''re my friend."


    "I was under the impression that Louis was your friend, too. Actually, I was under the impression that he was your boyfriend," Jennifer said. "Is that a step down? Should I be flattered?"


    David swallowed hard, looking down at his plate, all appetite gone. Boyfriend. Was that what they''d been? Would Louis have called him his boyfriend?


    "David?" Jennifer prompted, her tone, well, not soft but not as clipped as usual, but David couldn''t get a response past the lump in his throat. "If he did something, you can tell me, you know."


    David looked up, then. "What?"


    Jennifer just watched him, all traces of humor gone. She looked dead serious in a way that made David want to squirm.


    "Whatever you''re thinking, stop thinking it, it''s nothing like that."


    Jennifer studied him for a moment longer before nodding. "Good. So you''re still in love with him, then?"


    David jolted so hard that one of the tines of his fork snapped off, skittering somewhere under the table. He ducked down to pick it up. When he emerged, Jennifer was tilting her head speculatively.


    He considered brushing it off again but couldn''t quite bring himself to. "Is that... weird? Should I be over him?"


    Jennifer shrugged. "No idea," she said, looking over at Louis and Nabila, her expression going a little soft. "I think it depends on the person."


    "Are you over her?" David asked.


    Jennifer glared. "We''re talking about you and your boy troubles, not me," she said.


    "There''s not much to talk about," David reiterated.


    "Then explain to me again why you broke up," she said. "Because the more I look at you two looking at each other the more I want to lock you in a broom closet until you sort things out."


    David sighed. "I don''t know, we just... did. He didn''t exactly explain it. But you know he''s going back to Weldstone Harbor eventually and he''s already dealing with everything with his sister and I''m... I don''t know what I''m doing, but I think that probably has something to do with it."


    Jennifer''s eyebrows shot up. "Wait, I feel like I missed something. Did you say he broke up with you?"


    "Yes, obviously. I already told you that," David hissed.


    Jennifer blinked at him, then looked over at Louis, then back at David as though trying to figure out a math problem that wasn''t adding up.


    He was almost flattered that she was so surprised that Louis had been the one to break up with David. Right up until her expression turned pained and she put her fingers to her temple as though she was embarrassed to be seen with him.


    "Was this before or after you asked him for space?" Jennifer asked. "Because, Davie, I don''t know if you are familiar with dating terms, but ''I need some time to think about things,'' is generally taken as a soft breakup. Like saying ''let''s grab coffee sometime,'' and then never grabbing coffee."


    David shook his head, frowning as he tried to recall exactly how that conversation had gone. He was definitely not the one who broke up with Louis, though.


    "There was context, though," David said, a little helpless. "I never said anything about breaking up. Even if he did take it that way for some reason, all it was was the excuse he was looking for."


    The one part of that conversation that was burned into his memory was Louis saying, You want to break up, with that detached expression on his face. Like he wasn''t even bothered by the prospect.


    "He doesn''t look too happy about it¡ªthough, maybe that''s just those serial killer eyebrows."


    David glared at her. ¡°Yeah, well, neither am I. If neither of us wanted to break up, we would still be together, right?¡±


    Jennifer grimaced. ¡°Knowing you, I¡¯m not so sure. Did you ever actually tell him how you felt?¡±


    ¡°Thanks for the vote of confidence."


    "I''ll take that as a no," Jennifer said, then looked over to Nabila and Louis again. David restrained himself for a full ten seconds before he, too, looked over. Louis was watching him, his expression almost grim.


    David wanted nothing more than to go up to him and start up a nonsense conversation about whether werewolves or vampires were better then tell him that David made a better vampire anyway once Louis had listed all of the merits of his character''s species over David''s. Anything to get that look off his face. But he couldn''t bring himself to do it.


    David looked down at his plate again.


    When he looked up, Louis and Nabila were leaving.


    "If you still want him," Jennifer said, thoughtfully, "you should tell him so before he really does leave."


    "It''s too late for that."


    ¡°Sometimes a second chance falls in your lap, David,¡± she said, her eyes going solemn in a way that was entirely unfamiliar to David, ¡°but usually, you have to make your own. I think he genuinely cares about you. I wouldn''t have given him my blessing to pursue you if he didn''t."


    ¡°You gave Louis your blessing? Why? How did that possibly come up in conversation?¡± David asked, the statement catching him off guard and making his cheeks burn. What was he, a 18th century maiden?


    "Because he asked," Jennifer said, shrugging.


    ¡°Louis asked for your blessing? When?¡±


    ¡°Ages ago. And, presumably, because he thought it prudent to get on my good side before asking for your hand,¡± she said, smiling at his distress. ¡°Took his sweet time wooing you, though.¡±


    ¡°He did not,¡± David spluttered. ¡°He kissed me the first week we met!¡±


    Jennifer looked a little surprised by that. ¡°Really?¡±


    ¡°Yeah, but at that point I didn¡¯t know what I wanted,¡± he said, still trying to wrap his head around this new information. ¡°So we brushed it under the rug for a while."


    ¡°Of course you did,¡± Jennifer said. ¡°But, in all this time, you''ve never considered that he might love you? And I don''t mean platonically."


    This story has been stolen from Royal Road. If you read it on Amazon, please report it


    David''s face heated until he was sure he was going to catch fire. It wasn''t that he''d never considered it, but he could never be sure it wasn''t just him projecting his feelings onto Louis.


    "If he does, he''s never said as much," David mumbled, even as something cold and dreadful settled in his gut. "He didn''t even seem bothered when it ended."


    Jennifer considered for a moment before letting out a low hum. "You know him better than I do, but has it occurred to you that Louis might have been holding back? Letting you set the pace?"


    That sounded... plausible. Louis had gone out of his way to make sure David was comfortable as he figured it out. He''d never seemed impatient with David''s pace¡ªat least, not until the very end.


    "No," David said. "Or, yes, but you didn''t see his face. He didn''t care, Jennifer. Call me a coward, but I don''t want to confess just to have him reject me again."


    "All right," she said. "It''s your heart, Davie. I''m just sorry things didn''t work out, I thought he''d been good for you."


    David swallowed hard and nodded, looking down at his plate as he carefully dissected his tostada with his broken fork. The truth was that Louis had been good for him and good to him and good in all the ways David could hope for. That was why he couldn''t let him break his heart again.


    *****


    After work, David was exhausted. Physically, from a long day of action sequences shot almost entirely outside and usually trudging through snow¡ªhe was beginning to regret his hubris in saying he''d do so many of them himself¡ªand, mentally, from forcing himself not to stare at Louis.


    It was a futile pursuit. He''d spent most of the day trying to decide if Louis really did feel anything for him. He''d come to the depressing conclusion that, even if David hadn''t gotten over his feelings in nearly six months, Louis surely would have.


    If he''d had feelings for David at some point, they must be long gone by now.


    He took a scalding hot shower to thaw himself then face planted into bed with the intention of getting an early night''s sleep before they had scenes scheduled nearly to midnight the next day.


    As soon as he''d fallen onto the bed, though, his mind started to wander back to Louis. After rolling around on the bed for a good hour, David gave up on sleep and pulled out his phone to check his email.


    The scripts for Friday had been sent out and he may as well get a head start memorizing his lines or at least read through the scene to see what happened. It was a fairly typical action sequence¡ªinside, this time, so at least they wouldn''t be filming in the snow.


    He''d be facing a monstrous horned demon alongside Louis. David winced in sympathy at some of the descriptions of what the characters would go through. He suspected that Jennifer would be having a grand time with the carnage.


    As he continued through the scene, though, his brow furrowed. That couldn''t be right.


    "What?" David asked aloud, as though the script might answer him. He read through the scene again but the words didn''t change.


    Don Christoph dies in Marcus Lazarus''s arms, his body and immortal soul crumbling into the black ashes of the undead.


    "What the fuck?"


    ****


    "Louis!" David called the next morning as soon as he spotted him outside the makeup trailer.


    Louis looked up from his phone and nodded in greeting, as though nothing strange had happened, but David knew for a fact that Louis had read the script¡ªhe always read the scripts as soon as he got them¡ªwhich mean that he already knew this was coming.


    David stopped a couple paces away and held up his phone. Louis frowned, looking momentarily confused until his expression changed to one of recognition and he let out a long breath.


    "Ah," Louis said. "You''ve read it?"


    "I''ve read it," David said slowly. "What¡ª" he broke off, not sure what exactly he was asking.


    What is this? That wasn''t really the question.


    Neither was, Is he really dying?


    What David truly wanted to ask was, Are you leaving me? But that was silly. He already knew Louis was leaving. And he had no reason to stay for David''s sake. They weren''t even together. David wasn''t even sure they were friends anymore.


    Louis hadn''t told him. Don Christoph was scheduled to die on Friday and Louis hadn''t even told him.


    Louis ducked his head for a moment, then met David''s eyes with a guarded expression.


    "Friday is my last day," he said, confirming everything that David had feared.


    He felt like he''d had the wind punched out of him. David''s hand dropped to his side and he searched Louis''s expression for something he didn''t find in it.


    "You didn''t tell me," David said, sure that some degree of the hurt he was feeling was showing on his face. He''d never been great at guarding his expressions, or his heart, it seemed.


    "It''s always been my plan to leave," Louis said, as though it was the same thing at all. "It''s just a little sooner than I''d meant to."


    "When did you decide?"


    "I spoke to Nabila and the producers in August," he said, looking off to the side as a pair of makeup artists walked by carrying what looked like dirt in a bucket. "I agreed to stay through the mid-season finale. It seemed like a good place to write Don Christoph off the show."


    David could only stare, flabbergasted.


    August.


    Louis had made his plans to leave in August.


    That was nearly six months ago. And David hadn''t heard anything about it until now.


    Then the rest of it really hit him. Don Christoph was being written off the show. Killed off. Which meant no chance of a comeback or even a guest appearance. He was gone for good. Turned to ashes.


    Louis had really decided to put this behind him and he wouldn''t be coming back.


    "You''re the main character," David said weakly, as though Louis didn''t know that, as though it would change anything. "The audience won''t be happy."


    "I''m not the only main character," Louis said, giving David a significant look. "The audience will get over it. They still have you."


    "So that''s it?" David asked, draining until all he could feel was an icy numbness that seemed disproportionate to a colleague leaving.


    It wasn''t like Louis was dying. But David felt like he might.


    "It will be," Louis said. He watched David for a moment then opened his mouth as though to say something, then closed it again and shook his head.


    "You should get going, you have werewolf makeup today," Louis said.


    "Right," David said blankly. "Right. I should go, then."


    So he did. But he wasn''t the one leaving, not really. Louis was. In some ways, he''d already left.


    *****


    You didn''t tell me.


    David''s hurt had spiked through Louis''s limbs as though it were his own when he''d said those words and there was nothing he could say to combat it, either. He hadn''t told David.


    Louis hadn''t been able to tell David, or hadn''t been able to make himself.


    At first, he''d still been sore over them breaking up and didn''t think it was any of David''s business. It hadn''t taken long for him to come to his senses and remember that that was neither fair nor professional.


    But, by then, he hadn''t wanted to incentivize David to keep his distance. It hadn''t worked.


    Finally, Louis simply didn''t know how to tell him after keeping it to himself for so long.


    He hadn''t even told Rosemarie yet. A superstitious part of his brain worried that she''d take it as a sign he was giving up on her if he did. Another part of him felt, guiltily, that perhaps he was.


    In any case, he was well aware that he was the asshole at this point. If he hadn''t known it already, the look on David''s face when he''d said it was enough to convince him of it. He rubbed a hand over his chest at the thought.


    Louis had been feeling anxious all day. David had gone back to avoiding him almost entirely. Louis didn''t think he''d seen him smile all day¡ªhe hadn''t realized how much he watched for David''s smile until he''d stopped smiling at Louis. Now, Louis found himself counting the times he smiled each day as though he could somehow measure the auspiciousness of a day in David''s joy. It felt like the only thing keeping him afloat, so when it was gone, Louis felt himself drowning.


    And, come Friday, he might never see that smile again.


    It wasn''t that long distance friendships couldn''t work. At the beginning of all of this, Louis had been sure that their friendship could withstand distance, but Louis was no longer sure that they were friends. That hurt just as much as losing David as a partner.


    The walls of the studio seemed to be abnormally close together for the rest of the day, so when they finally finished their last shoot¡ªit had been another fourteen-hour day¡ªLouis was ready to go home.


    He didn''t bother to say goodbye to anyone, though he glanced around the parking lot for David out of habit. David was already climbing into Jennifer''s car without a glance in his direction, so Lous followed suite and left without a word.


    He should have apologized. David deserved the apology. He wasn''t sure why he hadn''t given it other than that he wasn''t sure it would mean anything at this point.


    Louis still didn''t regret his decision to leave, though. Friday could not come soon enough. David would take over as the lead on the show and it would all work out. Louis had no doubt he''d be fantastic.


    He wanted to tell him so. There was a lot he wanted to tell David. Louis pinched his brow, setting his elbow against the window.


    An apology was still at the forefront. He considered calling, but decided against it. David was probably in bed already and he probably deserved an in-person apology anyway.


    Maybe he''d invite him to dinner tomorrow. Rosemarie would be excited to hear about it. It might be enough to tempt David to forgive Louis''s assholery.


    The road up to Rosemarie''s house curved up the side of the hill, the house only coming into view once he hit the circle. Louis immediately noticed something was off. Since he was a teenager, Rosemarie had always left the porch light on until he got home in the evening.


    Tonight, there was no light. A knot formed in Louis''s stomach as he realized that Rosemarie hadn''t texted him at all that day, either. She hadn''t even texted him goodnight when it had gotten late enough that she must have gone to bed.


    Forcing his panic down, Louis parked the car in the driveway, too impatient to wait for the garage to open. He ducked under it when it was half way open and sprinted inside.


    Her car was exactly where it had been last night, parked a little too far to the right, so she must not have gone to her book club that afternoon.


    The knot tightened.


    Louis sprinted up the stairs. There were no lights on, but¡ªwait, no, Rosemarie''s bedroom light was on, the soft glow visible beneath her door.


    ¡°Rosemarie,¡± Louis said quietly, knocking at the door. There was no answer. With a shaking hand, Louis pushed the door open.


    He wasn¡¯t sure how, but he knew she was gone the moment he stepped into the room.


    For a long moment, Louis couldn¡¯t force his legs to move any farther. He stood frozen in the doorway, staring at the lifeless form that used to be his sister.


    ¡°Rosemarie,¡± he repeated, voice breaking in a sob, lurching forward until his knees hit the bed. Nothing seemed real as Louis touched a shaking hand to her arm. His hand snapped away again like it had been burned.


    Her skin was cold to the touch.


    ¡°No, God, please, not yet,¡± he said nonsensically.


    He had the irrational urge to leave the room and come back in, just to make sure this wasn¡¯t his imagination¡ªas if that would reset the last three minutes and everything would go back to normal. She would sit up and tell him that he shouldn¡¯t wake sick patients, then scold him for worrying. Then she''d tell him to go to bed and, in the morning she''d have him bring his script to her so she could help him practice lines just like she had since he was five-years-old and stubbornly in way over his head.


    But she wouldn''t. She wouldn''t wake up in the morning. This wasn''t a dream at all. It wasn''t even a nightmare.


    Louis leaned down to press his lips to her forehead.


    ¡°I love you,¡± he whispered. ¡°I love you so much.¡±


    She looked beautiful, even as this frail and lifeless form. There was calm in her face instead of the pain she had endured over the least few years. Louis sat down gently beside her and ran a hand over her cheek, the other balling into a fist so hard that he felt his fingernails biting into his palm.


    ¡°I¡¯m sorry,¡± Louis said. ¡°I¡¯m so sorry.¡±


    A sob broke from him and Louis doubled over until his head was pressed against her still chest.


    She was so cold. How long had she been like this? Had she known it was time? Had she thought to call him, or had she not wanted to disturb his work?


    Why had it been today? Why had it been when he was away instead of being at her side? Why hadn''t Louis known it would be today?


    That morning, he had hugged her and told her he loved her and she had said she was feeling well enough that she might go meet her book club later. But instead...


    Instead, she was gone.


    Louis couldn¡¯t bring himself to pull away from her. Even though she wasn¡¯t really her anymore, just an empty form that once held the most important person in Louis''s life.


    Eventually, his breathing quieted down enough for him to sit up. He glanced at the phone by her bed. The numbers for her doctor, the hospital, and the funeral home were all on a list of paper beside it.


    Rosemarie had even left instructions on who he needed to call and what to say to them. It was such a characteristic thing for her to do that it made him laugh despite himself. Even from beyond the grave, she was still insistent that she would take care of him.


    I want this to be easy on you, she had said once.


    Louis picked up the phone and dialed emergency services. The paperwork granting him power of attorney and the do-not-resuscitate document were tucked in the drawer of her bedside table along with some other papers Louis would have to go through later.


    She had truly prepared everything.


    Louis''s heart clenched in his chest and he did his best to keep his voice steady as they walked him through the process. Louis stayed beside her as the physician confirmed her death and explained what would happen next.


    The rest of it was a blur, no more real than a dream, right up until Louis watched them take her body from the house. Louis suspected that that image would stay with him for the rest of his life.


    When he closed and locked the door behind them, Louis couldn¡¯t even make it to his room before sliding to the floor and burying his head in his knees.


    Guilt clutched at Louis¡ªguilt for quitting, as though he had given up hope that she would make it to the end of the season. Guilt for not quitting sooner¡ªfor not being here with her as much as possible over the last year and a half. Guilt for not having appreciated her while she''d been alive.


    It was irrational. He knew it was irrational, but the weight of it crushed him.


    He should have done something more. Hell, at sixteen, he''d refused to move to Midtown with her. And, now, he''d never get the chance to live with her again.


    These last days with her had been a blessing, and he¡¯d spent the entire time wishing he weren¡¯t here.


    Part of him wanted to call... somebody, anybody. Nabila, maybe, and tell them. Just so that someone else knew. So that someone could share, if not his grief, then at least this terrible knowledge.


    But if he called Nabila, she would tell him not to come in tomorrow, and right now that was the only thought that was keeping him from completely crumbling.


    Tomorrow had to be normal, if only in that.


    He would get through tomorrow, and he would get through Friday.


    Then, Friday night Nabila wanted to take the cast out to dinner as a farewell. He might even go to that. Anything to stay out of this house. This stupid house with the unfinished bookshelves and the aching emptiness.


    He glanced down at his phone. It was nearly two in the morning. Past midnight. A new day.


    The first day he would ever live without Rosemarie.


    His fingers hovered over his contacts list, he tapped on David¡¯s name without really thinking about it. Rosemarie had been David''s friend. He should tell him. Part of him wanted to tell him for selfish reasons, too. So that David would come over and he wouldn''t be alone here. But he couldn¡¯t bring himself to press the call button.


    How did you give someone that news?


    If David was here, it would make it that much more real.


    But if Louis closed his eyes, it was almost like any other night. Rosemarie would be asleep upstairs and Louis would be in bed, reading his lines or maybe a good book, trying to get his head to shut off long enough to fall asleep.


    Finally, Louis forced himself to stand. Almost mechanically, Louis went to his room, divested himself of his clothing, and turned the shower on as hot as it would go.


    The scalding water did nothing to remove the feeling of death that clung to him.


    Louis stared at his hands as water trickled off of them and down the drain, wishing the world would just stop for a little while and let him stop for a little while, too. Just until this ache went away, or until he stopped feeling altogether.

 Chapter Twenty-Three

    By Friday, David could fully admit that he was avoiding Louis. But Louis was making it pretty easy. He''d been distant since their conversation and, though, David knew Louis had a lot on his plate, he didn''t think he could forgive this so easily.


    Even as friends, he thought he deserved to hear from Louis that he was leaving. And now it was their last day together. Maybe forever.


    David hated that.


    He didn''t know what to do about it, either. Or even if there was anything to do about it.


    Louis seemed, if not mad, then upset, too. He hadn''t even tried to talk to him since Wednesday. David might have thought he was giving him the cold shoulder if he didn''t seem to be equally avoiding everyone else. It was a bit strange, but maybe it was just Louis''s way of detaching himself from the scene before he left.


    David hated that, too.


    ¡°All right, people, last shoot of the day!¡± Nabila shouted.


    David was equal parts excited over and dreading this scene. It was the scene. The one that marked both the end of Louis''s time on the show and Don Christoph''s. It was a beautiful scene, but it was also... the end.


    ¡°I¡¯m sorry,¡± Louis cut in, ¡°I need a moment before we continue.¡±


    David did an actual double take at that, looking over at Louis. He did look a bit off. Was he sick? He must be, because David had never heard Louis ask for a break. Especially not on a scene like this one.


    Nabila frowned, but gestured for Louis to go do what he needed. ¡°Take ten, everyone.¡±


    David froze, staring after him with worry. Was he actually sick? Or was he emotional about leaving? It couldn''t be the latter.


    Unless...


    David shot a worried look in Nabila''s direction.


    She seemed just as concerned as David which made David twice as concerned as before, then she caught his eye with an expression that seemed to ask, ¡®Are you going, or should I?¡¯


    Without another thought, David sprinted out the door after Louis, a dreadful hunch settling in his stomach.


    Louis must have been walking quickly, because he was already almost to the back exit when David finally caught sight of his back.


    ¡°Louis, wait!¡± David rushed after him, grabbing him by the arm and tugging him to a stop. ¡°Where are you going?"


    Louis didn''t look at him, but David saw his expression anyway. His face was tight and drawn, his brows furrowed and lips in a thin line.


    ¡°Let go, David,¡± Louis said, voice rough.


    David didn¡¯t.


    Instead, he tugged gently on the arm until Louis was facing him, though he still didn¡¯t make eye-contact. Louis''s mouth twitched as though he was going to say something before his face sort of fell.


    David¡¯s heart started to break with the news he knew he was about to her.


    ¡°Rosemarie?¡± he asked, feeling hot tears prickling behind his eyes. He didn''t need to ask. There was nothing else that could put that look in his eyes.


    Louis just gave a tiny shake of his head, eyes squeezing shut.


    David took in a shaky breath, his other hand coming up to grip Louis''s shoulder.


    Louis''s voice broke as he said, ¡°She¡¯s... gone.¡±


    ¡°Fuck,¡± was all David could say.


    "David¡ª" Louis said, his tone small, almost pleading.


    All David could think to do was tug Louis into his arms. So he did.


    Louis went stiff for a split second before strong arms clamped almost painfully tight around David''s ribs, but still not tight enough. David¡¯s hand tangled into the hair at the nape of Louis''s neck, the other pressed hard against Louis''s back. Stubble scratched against his skin as Louis nose dug into his shoulder.


    ¡°When?¡± David asked thickly.


    Louis''s arms tensed and David gave his neck a reassuring squeeze.


    ¡°Wednesday," he choked out. "I found her... when I got home."


    David''s vision blurred and he swallowed, running his hand up and down Louis''s back even as he tried not to start sobbing himself.


    ¡°I¡¯m sorry. I didn¡¯t know,¡± David said. His arms tightened reflexively, as though holding him tighter could somehow shield him from the grief.


    Louis let out a bitter laugh. ¡°Of course you didn¡¯t know. I didn¡¯t tell you.¡± The words were harsh, but Louis was pressed so firmly against David¡¯s shoulder that he could feel the moisture of his breath against his skin.


    "You should have," David said, not an admonishment, simply a reminder.


    Louis was silent for a long time, but he didn''t pull away, either.


    "I''m sorry," he said at last. "I... didn''t know how." David thought that he was talking about more than just Rosemarie, but the other seemed so insignificant now.


    "It doesn''t matter how," David said. "You don''t have to go through everything alone, you know. I still¡ªI''m still your friend. Whatever else we are or aren''t, I am your friend."


    And I still love you. He kept that part to himself, but gave him another squeeze to emphasize the words.


    ¡°I would have come,¡± David whispered, rubbing a thumb over Louis''s nape.


    It had been far too long since he''d held Louis. The scent and warmth of him was achingly familiar and David thought he''d be content to stay like this forever. Luckily, Louis seemed no more inclined to let go than he was.


    Sighing, David pressed a kiss against the bare skin of Louis''s neck. It wasn¡¯t a conscious action, he just couldn¡¯t help himself. Louis sucked in a surprised breath and David tensed as he realized what he''d done, but, after a long moment, Louis gave a little nod against David''s neck.


    "I know," Louis said.


    ¡°I can tell Nabila,¡± David murmured. ¡°She¡¯d understand.¡±


    This tale has been unlawfully lifted without the author''s consent. Report any appearances on Amazon.


    ¡°No,¡± Louis said, and broke away from the embrace.


    David felt bereft at the loss.


    Louis straightened, looking up at the ceiling and taking a deep breath. When he looked back down at David¡ªwho was still blinking away tears¡ªhe looked utterly composed again.


    ¡°Why?¡± David asked, thinking he¡¯d probably like an afternoon off, and she wasn¡¯t even his sister. He didn''t know how Louis had gotten through yesterday''s shoot. But, then, Louis always handled things a little differently.


    ¡°I want to finish this,¡± he said. ¡°I want to finish this and then...¡± Louis shook his head. ¡°I just need to finish this.¡±


    David studied his expression. If that was what he needed, then that was what they''d do. David took a moment to compose himself then gave Louis what he hoped was an encouraging smile, though it felt a little sad on his face.


    ¡°Then let¡¯s finish it."


    Louis nodded, his expression grim.


    David wanted to pull him into another embrace. Instead, he just reached out and squeezed his arm before the two of them headed back to the studio.


    Nabila caught their eyes as they entered, but Louis just nodded in that almost haughty way that said he was finished with whatever had caused the interruption and they should hurry up and continue. David gave her a thumbs up though he couldn''t quite bring himself to smile.


    Regardless, it was surprisingly easy to slip back into Marcus Lazarus¡¯s mindset. The fa?ade came over him almost at once, maybe because of the nature of the scene itself. It was, in a way, perfect; a scene of grief mirroring grief.


    Marcus choked on his breath, spitting out a mouthful of blood and bile. The black wolf had taken a chunk out of his shoulder, and without his supernatural healing, he would have been long dead by now. That didn¡¯t stop it from hurting like hell, though.


    Marcus winced as he struggled to his knees, half-dragging himself across the room.


    Where was Don?


    The demon was dead, his many-horned head lying on the floor two feet from his body.


    Marcus grunted as he levered himself up, leaning all of his weight on the desk as he dragged himself to his feet.


    ¡°Don,¡± Marcus called, then coughed again, his eyes going in and out of focus. ¡°It¡¯s over.¡±


    A gurgling gasp pricked his ears and Marcus turned, nearly losing his grip on the desk as he caught sight of a pair of long legs behind an upturned desk. The trousers were nondescript black, but Marcus knew those shoes. Shiny, oxblood leather, always carefully polished to a shine.


    Ink-dark blood had started to soak into the leather from where it pooled.


    Marcus shoved aside chairs, catching himself on each desk as he stumbled and lurched towards the upturned desk.


    ¡°Don,¡± Marcus repeated more urgently, falling to his knee just on the wrong side of the desk as his ravaged leg gave out on him. He scrambled forward, through the widening pool of onyx.


    ¡°No,¡± Marcus said, his breath freezing in his chest. ¡°No, don¡¯t do this.¡±


    His face contorted as he stared down at his friend. The sword that had dealt the final blow lay in a limp hand at Don''s side. But Don¡¯s neck, too, had been severed in a gruesome gash. Black blood bubbled from Don¡¯s lips, even as he gave Marcus a feral smile, eyes flashing in the electric glow of the police station.


    Marcus fell to his knees beside him. ¡°What is this? You said you could handle it,¡± Marcus said, gathering Don into his arms, even as he tried and failed to staunch the bleeding. He could feel both grief and rage building behind his eyes, something wild and furious roaring through his blood.


    ¡°I... handled it,¡± Don coughed.


    Handled. The demon was dead. The town was safe. And Don Christoph was....


    ¡°You did,¡± Marcus relented, voice tight.


    Don gave a wet chuckle. ¡°Finally,¡± he broke off, coughing. ¡°Finally agreeing... with me?¡±


    ¡°Old dogs, new tricks. Go to hell,¡± Marcus said, grinning down at him, though it quickly twisted into a grimace, his vision starting to blur from either blood loss or tears.


    Don¡¯s hand came up to grip Marcus arm, desperate and clawing. He pulled Marcus closer, staring at him with those ancient and merciless eyes eyes. ¡°It¡¯s... your town now.¡±


    ¡°What happened to our town?¡± Marcus said, forcing the levity past the raw emotion caught in his throat. ¡°You trying to pass all the hard work onto me?¡±


    ¡°It¡¯s always been your town, my... friend,¡± Don said. He let out a last rattling breath before his hand fell away.


    ¡°Don,¡± Marcus said, giving he vampire a shake. ¡°Don!¡± The light had gone from his eyes, though, his skin beginning to char and blacken in the final death of the undead.


    ¡°No!¡± Marcus growled, hand fisting into he front of Don¡¯s shirt. ¡°You bastard.¡±


    Don''s form shriveled and cracked before him, slipping like sand through Marcus''s fingers. At last, Marcus''s hands fell limp to his sides, the enormity of everything they had lost and everything that they had won hitting him all at once.


    ¡°I¡¯ll protect this place,¡± Marcus swore. ¡°But not for you, dammit. I¡¯ll protect it because it needs protecting, you bastard. Not for you.¡±


    Marcus closed his eyes, jaw clenching so tight he could feel his teeth shift as blood, or sweat, or something else tracked down his cheeks.


    As quickly and silently as he had appeared, Don Christoph faded back into nothing.


    ¡°Cut!¡± Nabila called. ¡°Fantastic work. David, Louis, that was absolutely amazing.¡±


    Louis had been pulled off the set to get the final shot of Marcus kneeling in a pool of vampire blood, staring heavenward as though in prayer. When David caught his eye, though, he could see the same raw emotion in them that he''d been feeling. David licked his lips, then cleared his throat, his entire head aching from the tears.


    They were all real and he had to look away before he burst into sobs on set. When he looked back to Louis, he had schooled his emotions again, his face displaying nothing but that same passive expression he''d worn all of yesterday. Only, now, David knew the secret he was keeping behind that mask.


    ¡°Great work everyone,¡± Nabila said. ¡°Now, I¡¯ll let you go and get ready for Louis''s send-off and a congratulations for making it to the midpoint of the season! Six o¡¯clock at Blue¡¯s. Free drinks and dinner. You guys have earned it.¡±


    After a quick shower to wash off the fake blood, David and Louis were both waylaid by a stream of congratulations and thank yous, hellos and goodbyes. David kept glancing towards Louis who graciously bid everyone goodbye and thanked them for taking care of him on the show.


    David just wanted to leave.


    He felt raw, inside and out, and he wanted to get Louis out of there, too. He wasn¡¯t sure what Louis needed, or how he could possibly make anything better, but he knew it wasn''t this.


    "Thanks, you all, but we have to run now," David said, grabbing Louis by the wrist and pulling him towards the door. Louis glanced at him with a raised eyebrow, but David didn''t say anything else until they made it to the parking lot.


    "You didn''t have to do that," Louis said. "But... thank you."


    David nodded.


    There was an awkward pause, then Louis said, "Well, then, goodbye, David."


    The words hit him like a ton of bricks and he froze in place as Louis turned away. Was that it? Was this their goodbye? David couldn''t imagine that Louis would show up to his farewell party. He didn''t like parties to begin with and David, who did like parties to begin with, had a knot in his stomach imagining going out for drinks right now.


    Was this really goodbye? Or was this Louis trying to push him away and shoulder everything himself. Again.


    By the time he''d made up his mind, Louis was half way across the parking lot. David sucked in a breath and sprinted after him. He couldn''t just leave things like this.


    ¡°Lou, wait up,¡± David called, realizing a second too late what he''d called him. Louis''s posture went ramrod straight, but he did stop, turning back to David with a guarded expression.


    ¡°Let me come?¡± David asked, shoving his hands in his pockets.


    Louis''s lips parted, but he didn''t speak. David wondered if he''d misread it and Louis really did want to be alone. But... David didn''t think he did.


    I think you see him how I see him, Rosemarie had said. David didn''t know how Rosemarie saw him, but David saw him as Louis. As a man. Messy and flawed. A little prickly and a little condescending. Talented and funny. And everything David had ever wanted.


    Louis closed his mouth, then gave an abrupt shake of his head. David stifled a wince.


    ¡°You don''t even know where I¡¯m going,¡± Louis said. ¡°I could be boarding a flight back to Weldstone Harbor.¡±


    That was true. David didn''t care.


    ¡°Let me come,¡± David said, more a statement this time than a question. "I''ll go with you. Wherever you''re going. So let me come with you."


    A horrible sort of vulnerability passed over Louis''s face and he looked away, toward the street and the crunching of tires over fresh snow. David wrapped a hand around Louis''s wrist and just held it.


    ¡°Her funeral is on Sunday,¡± Louis said. ¡°My plane leaves Monday morning.¡±


    David nodded, keeping his grip on Louis''s arm.


    ¡°I¡ª¡± Louis started. ¡°She¡¯d want you to be there.¡±


    David nodded again, feeling a bit like a bobblehead.


    ¡°Of course,¡± David said. ¡°Of course.¡± His grip on Louis''s wrist tightened.


    Louis allowed the touch for a moment more before he pulled his arm free and gestured for him to follow. They made their way to Louis''s car and then, to David¡¯s surprise, Louis tossed the keys to him and got in the passenger¡¯s side.


    ¡°Where to?¡± David asked, turning the car on and letting it idle for a moment as he waited for directions.


    ¡°Anywhere,¡± Louis said, voice tight. ¡°Just not back... not back to her house.¡±


    David nodded, pulling the car out onto the pavement. The only direction he could think to drive was into town, but that must be nearly as rife with memories as Rosemarie''s house. A party was not what Louis needed, either, so David took them straight through until they hit the freeway. They would drive until they found something or somewhere that was just away. Away from all the memories and the grief.


    And if they didn''t find it, they would just drive.

 Chapter Twenty-Four

    David drove like someone who had been doing it his whole life, loose and comfortable and relaxed, even through the snow. He had only driven with David once before and he''d fallen asleep almost immediately, but he knew David could drive. He''d just assumed he didn''t enjoy it given how long he''d been carpooling or walking to work, sometimes with snow dusting his shoulders by the time he got to the studio.


    But David drove like someone who could appreciate the pleasure and skill of it. It took a moment for Louis to figure out what seemed so strange about that.


    When he did, he almost smiled, turning his head away before David could catch him staring.


    This was the stillest that Louis had ever seen him.


    Even in his sleep, David was restless, as though trying to be in too many places at once. Louis''s little car didn¡¯t have the horsepower of a sports car or the ride of a luxury vehicle, but for some reason, sitting here beside David as they drove, he felt more at ease than he had since¡ªas long as he could remember, actually.


    The grief was still there, a pulsing ache at his core that he didn''t think would ever really leave him, but it seemed less immediate here, with his eyes focusing on the road and the flurry of snowflakes melting against the windshield.


    David didn¡¯t turn on the radio, didn¡¯t even speak. After a while, though, he did start to hum. Louis''s eyes prickled. He didn''t dare look over at him, afraid that if he realized he was doing it, he might stop, and more afraid that he might see everything Louis was feeling written across his face.


    Instead, Louis closed his eyes and leaned against the window, listening to the sound of David¡¯s voice, and the soft whir of passing cars.


    When he opened them again, he realized they were heading towards town. Louis considered telling David he didn¡¯t want to go to the party, even if it was ostensibly for him, but hesitated at the last minute, finding that he didn''t really care. If that was where David was taking them, that¡¯s where he¡¯d follow.


    He just didn¡¯t want to have to think anymore.


    David didn¡¯t exit the freeway in time for the turn off to the bar, though, instead he took the freeway two exits farther, then got off, filled the tank at the road stop, and pulled back onto the freeway again.


    ¡°Are we running away?¡± Louis asked, his voice sounding too loud in the soft, snowy, darkness.


    David glanced over at him, then back to the road, hiking up one shoulder in a shrug.


    ¡°If you want."


    ¡°I don¡¯t know what I want,¡± Louis said honestly.


    David nodded slowly, as though that made perfect sense to him. It didn''t to Louis.


    He didn¡¯t know how much longer they drove in silence before David pulled off the freeway again. Louis had no idea where they were¡ªand it didn¡¯t really look like David did, either, judging by his frown as he peered down each road as they drove into the middle of some town Louis hadn''t caught the name of.


    The sun had long since set and Louis realized he should text Nabila. He didn''t know what to say, but she deserved some explanation for his absence. Louis pulled out his phone and stared at it for a moment, thumbs hovering over the keyboard.


    "Ah hah!" David said and Louis looked up, surprised.


    David pulled off the road into a little parking lot that was barely a parking lot at all.


    "It''s tradition," David declared.


    ¡°This is a different park,¡± Louis pointed out, even as he climbed out of the car after David.


    David sighed as though Louis was missing the point.


    ¡°It still has swings,¡± he said, walking over to one of the afore mentioned swings and sitting down on it. It was cold, but not terribly so and there was no wind to bite through the fleece of his jacket, so Louis trailed after him.


    The park was deserted this late and it was oddly reminiscent of the first night he had kissed David. That thought was pleasant in all the wrong ways. It set of an entirely different type of ache in his chest and reminded him of a different kind of loss.


    The memory tasted bitter as he remembered that, come Monday, he wouldn''t be seeing David anymore. He wondered if a better man would have stayed for David. Maybe a better man would have deserved him. He definitely wouldn''t have hurt him.


    But Louis was never a particularly good man. He would go back to Weldstone Harbor, and David would stay here, working on this show he loved with other people who loved it. And, after Night Mist, Louis was certain that David would be snatched up by another director who saw what Louis saw in him.


    David would go far, but Louis wouldn''t be there for it. Louis didn¡¯t know if he¡¯d ever be able to set foot in this town again after the funeral and he had no right to ask David to come back to Weldstone Harbor with him. David had his own dreams and desires and friends didn''t leave their careers behind just to stay close by.


    ¡°Come, sit,¡± David said, pointing at the swing to his right. Louis looked at it for a moment, considering how wet his ass was going to be once the snow melted before doing as he was bid and taking a seat.


    David didn¡¯t start swinging, instead he just twisted the chains, spinning this way and that as Louis watched from his own swing.


    ¡°We never finished the bookshelf,¡± David said at last, he sounded almost tentative, as though he wasn''t sure if Louis would accept the topic. Part of him wanted to shy away from it, but another part of him wanted to cling to every scrap of her that he still had.


    Louis shook his head. ¡°No,¡± he said. ¡°She was never very good at finishing projects.¡±


    David smiled, though it was a sad smile. ¡°Too busy with new projects to finish old ones?¡±


    Louis let out a soft laugh.


    ¡°Something like that,¡± he said. ¡°She was always all over the place. She was almost as introverted as I am, but she loved everything that life had to offer. She couldn¡¯t contain her enthusiasm to just one thing. She had so much to give...¡±


    Louis looked up at the sky, fighting back the prickle of tears even at the joyful memories.


    ¡°She loved you,¡± David said.


    Louis couldn¡¯t meet his gaze. ¡°I know.¡±


    ¡°No,¡± David said, cheek resting against the chain of his swing as he rocked side to side, his hip bumping into Louis''s as he did. ¡°I mean she really loved you.¡±


    Louis looked over at him, then, though his face was blurred through unshed tears.


    ¡°She loved you in a way that I didn¡¯t even know existed,¡± David said. ¡°You¡¯re lucky. And she was lucky to have you, too.¡±


    Louis shook his head.


    ¡°I didn¡¯t even want to move away with her when I was a kid. She always looked out for me, but I didn¡¯t even take care of her when I could.¡±


    "Louis¡ª"


    "I wasn''t with her," Louis said, the awful truth of it ripping itself free of his grasp. "I wasn''t with her when she died. I left her alone."


    "She''d forgive you for that," David said.


    This narrative has been unlawfully taken from Royal Road. If you see it on Amazon, please report it.


    Louis shook his head. "I don''t deserve it."


    ¡°She knew what she was to you and what she meant to you,¡± David said and Louis wanted to trust in the certainty of his tone. ¡°There¡¯s no way she didn¡¯t know. But, even if she didn¡¯t, you were worth it to her anyway. She loved you that much.¡±


    Louis couldn¡¯t hold back the choked sob, but David didn¡¯t react, just continuing to twist his swing this way and that, his leg occasionally bumping up against Louis''s.


    ¡°How would you know?¡± Louis asked, a little too sharply.


    David hummed, refusing to take the bait. ¡°I know because she told me so.¡±


    ¡°What?¡± Louis asked, feeling altogether too visible as he sniffed away his tears, brushing his face against his sleeve.


    David glanced sideways at him, then reaching out to rest a gloved hand on the back of his neck. He gave it an affectionate squeeze, looking almost fond, despite Louis''s temper.


    ¡°She wanted to make sure that you had someone when she was gone,¡± he said. ¡°She knew who you are, and she loved you for it. She was so proud of you.¡± David chuckled. ¡°She showed me some of her albums. My mother wasn¡¯t even that dedicated to me.¡±


    ¡°I know she loved me,¡± Louis said, frustrated and aching even more with the knowledge of all she had done for him without ever asking for anything in return.


    ¡°Yes,¡± David agreed. ¡°And you loved her just as much. She knew that because she asked me to stay with you.¡±


    Louis stilled, suddenly feeling cold in a way that had nothing to do with the snow. ¡°Is that what this is?¡±


    David straightened, his strong brows drawing together. ¡°Not at all. No, that''s wrong. I promised her, but only because I already cared about you anyway."


    "I don''t want your companionship out of a sense of duty to my sister," Louis snapped. The thought of David only being here because of her cut through him until he felt himself bleeding out just like Don Christoph. It felt like a betrayal, though he couldn''t pinpoint exactly why.


    ¡°I''m not here because of her!¡± David insisted. "I''m here because of you."


    ¡°Of course,¡± Louis said, standing and starting back toward the car. "It''s not like you''ve been ignoring me for months, only to have a change of heart once she was gone."


    David grabbed his arm, yanking him around with so much force, he tripped back against a chain link fence. For one moment, Louis thought that David was going to kiss him.


    He didn''t, of course. Because they weren''t like that. Not now.


    Louis''s heart still pounded, eyes dipping to David''s mouth.,


    ¡°Louis, shut the fuck up,¡± David said.


    Louis pulled his arm free, but David only stepped closer, twining his fingers through the links of the fence as he caged Louis between his arms. Louis glowered over David''s shoulder.


    ¡°I¡¯m saying,¡± David said slowly, ¡°that she wanted you to have someone. Not someone who saw Louis Greene, someone who saw you. I see you, Louis. So I''m here.¡±


    Louis swallowed thickly, his hand coming up to rest at David''s collarbone, caught between pushing him away and pulling him close. After another heartbeat''s time, David''s hands dropped from the fence and he took half a step back, straightening up again.


    Without really meaning to, Louis''s hand gripped the collar of David''s coat, keeping him from retreating any farther. David froze, looking at him with wide blue eyes. Louis dropped his hand immediately.


    "Sorry," he muttered, clearing his throat.


    "Louis," David said, chewing his lip, "you know, you¡ª" He cut off with a frustrated sound and then his arms were around Louis''s waist, pulling him close.


    Louis had never thought of himself as a clingy person, but in that moment, he clung to David. He wrapped his arms around David''s broad back and pressed his cheek to David''s temple.


    David was warm and present and here and he couldn¡¯t possibly understand how much Louis needed that¡ªneeded him. If there was never anything else between them, if they never saw each other again after Louis left on Monday, having him here right now might be worth all of the pain of the future.


    ¡°You aren¡¯t alone,¡± David said, his voice a little muffled in Louis''s shoulder. "You don''t ever have to be alone, okay?" David ground his chin into Louis''s shoulder as though printing the words into his flesh.


    "Thank you," Louis said, the words entirely inadequate to express the depth of Louis''s gratitude.


    It was extremely difficult to force himself to pull away again. David was flushed pink from the cold and stood awkwardly back as Louis gestured to the car.


    ¡°I think it¡¯s time to go back,¡± he said, simply.


    David glanced at his watch, then nodded.


    An alarmingly loud screech had both Louis and David jumping before David began patting down his coat to pull out his phone.


    ¡°Jennifer,¡± David said, wincing. ¡°I forgot to tell her we wouldn¡¯t be there.¡±


    ¡°Hey,¡± David said. There was a long string of muffled curses, then something said in a quieter voice. David glanced at Louis, who took his cue to make himself discreet, then David said, ¡°Yeah, I¡¯m here with Louis.¡±


    Louis climbed back in the car, taking the driver¡¯s seat this time. He thought he could probably reverse engineer how they got here and once they got back to Midtown, it would be time to drop David back off at the B&B.


    Louis glanced out the window, watching the way David¡¯s whole body moved as he spoke to Jennifer, alternately pouting and teasing. He would miss that. He would miss that a lot.


    Louis pulled out his own phone to see a text message from Nabila asking if he was all right.


    The peace he''d been leaching from David seemed to dissolve in an instant and he rubbed his temple, feeling exhausted all of the sudden. He pulled off his mittens and typed out a response, the words, once again, entirely inadequate, but they were all that was left.


    *****


    Louis must have known what they were talking about, but he just walked back over to the car and got in. David listened half-heartedly to Jennifer¡¯s scolding for not telling anyone that neither of them were going to be there¡ªespecially considering it was Louis''s going away party.


    ¡°Jennifer,¡± David said in a hushed voice.


    Jennifer quieted immediately. She might like to pretend to be a hard ass, but she could be both perceptive and sensitive when necessary.


    ¡°What¡¯s wrong?¡± she demanded. ¡°Did something happen? Are you all right?¡±


    ¡°I''m¡ª,¡± David started, then let out a whistling breath, ¡°Rosemarie died, Jennifer. I''m going to stay with him.¡±


    ¡°Shit,¡± Jennifer said, concisely. ¡°Yeah, do that. I''ll let everyone know there were extenuating circumstances.¡±


    "Thanks," David said.


    ¡°Of course. Take care. Both of you. I know that she was your friend, too. I¡¯m really sorry, David.¡±


    David swallowed the lump in his throat. He¡¯d managed to hold it together so far, and now really wasn¡¯t the time to break down. ¡°Yeah. So am I.¡±


    ¡°Call me tomorrow, then,¡± Jennifer commanded.


    David assured her that he would, then turned to the car. Louis was driving, it seemed, so David climbed into the passenger side, and handed him the keys.


    ¡°Where to?¡± David asked.


    Louis glanced at him.


    ¡°Home,¡± Louis said, the sound short and stiff, a grim travesty of the word. What was a house without the people that made it home?


    David couldn¡¯t help but think about the pile of lumber still sitting at the edge of the garage. What would happen to it? What would happen to the house? Should David offer to finish the shelf, or was that invasive? Would he sell the house?


    Rosemarie would never see the shelf finished. The thought made his eyes sting again. She''d never be able to see the end of Night Mist, either.


    There was so much potential wasted in death.


    So many things that were supposed to happen that never would.


    David had never lost anyone close to him before and he found it almost as unsettling as it was painful. The loss was too immediate now, too vivid and present, to actually feel real. He didn¡¯t know what to say or how to help someone who had lost everyone.


    His own company seemed like a pale replacement for what Louis had shared with Rosemarie.


    The sign marking their entrance to Midtown was as nondescript as the rest of the town. David found himself wanting to turn around and leave agin, like he could avoid the pain if he was somewhere else.


    Maybe this was how Louis felt every time he was here.


    Mitdown just seemed different knowing Rosemarie was no longer in it. Like it was trying to be something that it wasn¡¯t anymore. Like it was trying to be home when it wasn¡¯t anymore.


    David let out a sigh as Louis pulled the car into the B&B. He didn¡¯t want Louis to leave. He unbuckled his seatbelt but didn¡¯t get out.


    ¡°Are you going home?¡± David asked, feeling the wrongness of the word as he said it.


    Louis gave him a look like that was a stupid question. ¡°Where else would I go?¡± Though the tone sounded more like, ¡®I have nowhere else to go.¡¯


    David¡¯s heart ached at the thought of him being alone there just waiting for Rosemarie''s funeral.


    ¡°You could come up,¡± David said, gesturing to the B&B.


    It wasn''t a good idea. They weren''t together. They wouldn''t be together anymore. Their expectations and needs were too different. But he had to offer.


    And a part of him hoped that Louis would say yes.


    Even if all they did was sit and talk all night, it had to be better than being alone.


    There was a long moment before Louis shook his head. ¡°I can¡¯t. I need to be alone.¡±


    David stifled his disappointment and even a little hurt. "All right."


    Everyone grieved differently and maybe Louis needed to grieve alone.


    ¡°You¡¯ll be there on Sunday, right?¡± Louis asked, catching David¡¯s wrist as he made to leave.


    David sat back down and nodded. ¡°Of course,¡± he said. ¡°I can come by tomorrow too, if there¡¯s anything you need.¡±


    Louis gave a quick shake of his head. ¡°No, enjoy your Saturday. I know Jennifer probably wants to see you.¡±


    ¡°She can wait,¡± David said, biting his lip. ¡°Louis, if you need anything, I¡¯m here.¡±


    ¡°There¡¯s nothing you can do, David,¡± Louis said almost apologetically.


    David nodded quickly. Of course there was nothing he could do. There was probably nothing anyone could do, but David still wished that he could have been someone Louis could lean on. He wished that things had gone differently in August.


    He wished things had gone differently in general.


    David paused out front of the door and waved as Louis pulled away, feeling his heart breaking all over again.


    He didn¡¯t stop to, think about it when he called Jennifer as soon as he got back to his room. Luckily, she answered on the third ring so she must not have been asleep.


    ¡°Can you come over after the party?¡± he asked. "I don''t want to be alone."


    She was quiet for a moment. ¡°Of course,¡± she said.


    It was only about thirty minutes later that she arrived, knocking on the door. David let her in and she wrapped her arms around him. David hugged her back hard enough that her feet left the floor.


    She borrowed one of his softest sweaters in leu of pajamas and they spent the night curled together on the bed watching David''s favorite episodes of Starfly on Jennifer''s tablet.


    *****


    David realized on Saturday night that he didn¡¯t actually own any black shirts.

 Chapter Twenty-Five

    A fresh layer of snow had appeared overnight, glittering picturesquely in the sun. It was a glaring contrast to what Louis was feeling, yet an appropriately beautiful scene for Rosemarie''s service.


    Louis set his face in an appropriately neutral grimness as he was greeted by each new friend and distant relative who had made their way here from near and far to bid Rosemarie farewell. But the only face Louis wanted to see was the one face that was conspicuously absent. He was starting to think that David might not make it at all.


    When Nabila and Jennifer arrived, giving their solemn condolences, Louis had asked after David, but Jennifer had said that he was taking a cab. Louis tried to pay attention to greeting everyone instead of searching the outskirts of the park for a familiar figure.


    It was nearly time for the service to start when Louis finally caught sight of him, the sheer relief of it hitting him like a truck. David was wearing a dark blue sweater and blue jeans under his taupe winter coat. It was so David that Louis actually had to hold back a laugh, but he contained his smile to his eyes. He looked uncharacteristically nervous and as he made his way over, Louis realized he had his guitar slung over his shoulder. Louis''s heart raced.


    ¡°David,¡± Louis said quietly as David came to stand beside him, so close that their shoulders brushed. ¡°Thank you for being here.¡±


    "Of course," David said, though he looked pale. He looked over at the casket like he expected it to bite. Louis knew the feeling.


    The crowd settled into rows of folding chairs as the minister began speaking, but, impulsively, Louis caught David''s wrist before he could do the same. David shot him a questioning look but whatever was in Louis''s expression had David giving him a short nod and half a smile. David settled back beside him, arms pressed together once more. Louis didn''t let go of his wrist and David never pulled away.


    When it was time for him to speak, he forced himself to release David''s wrist¡ªthough he was half tempted to drag him up to center stage anyway. David gave him an encouraging nod and Louis looked out over the crowd. He was not prone to stage fright, but there was a bleak sort of terror in having to say the words that marked the last page in Rosemarie''s book.


    Louis swallowed, then spoke.


    "Thank you for being here today. Both for Rosemarie and for everyone here feeling her loss. It''s a comfort to see so many faces of those she loved and those who loved her."


    There was a murmur of assent and Louis could see the glistening of tears in many eyes. In a strange way, it was a comfort to see the grief that her loss brought. It was a grief that mirrored the love she''d shown and been shown in life.


    "I''ve found myself at a loss for what to say," Louis continued. "To me, Rosemarie was a sister, parent, friend, and confidant. She was the person who always knew what to do and happily¡ªeven stubbornly¡ªgave every part of herself to the people she loved."


    There was a bit of tearful laughter at that and Louis let himself smile fondly, though his eyes were starting to sting. He glanced down briefly to compose himself before looking up to the crowd again.


    "That''s what she was to me. But she was so much more than that, too. I look around and I see what she was to all of you. A patron, a teacher, a neighbor, maybe only a brief acquaintance. Even so, she''d be glad to see you here."


    He paused, letting that sit.


    "Rosemarie''s life was characterized by love. She loved life and this world and the people in with a passion that most can only aspire to. If you keep anything in memory of her, I hope that it''s that. I hope that you will leave here with the warmth of her love and with her passion and I hope you will keep her alive in your hearts and your memories by filling your own lives with the love and joy that she would have wished for every one of you."


    Louis met the eyes of everyone in the gathering, lingering a little longer on David¡¯s than anyone else¡¯s.


    ¡°Thank you, again, for being here today, and thank you for being here for each other in the coming days."


    There was a scattering of applause and Louis stepped back towards David and the minister took center stage again, asking for anyone else who wanted to speak.


    As they went through the rest of the service, David''s fingers worried at his sleeve with more and more fervor until Louis couldn''t stop himself from grabbing David''s hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. David''s fingers stilled, then wrapped around Louis''s, returning the gesture.


    ¡°If there is nothing more,¡± the minister said after a final query, ¡°we shall commit¡ª¡±


    ¡°Wait,¡± David said, then made a face like he hadn¡¯t meant to. All eyes turned to him, including Louis''s. He swallowed visibly. ¡°I, uh, I¡¯d like to say a few words, if that¡¯s all right.¡± He glanced nervously at Louis who could nod, releasing his hand with a degree of regret.


    ¡°Thank you,¡± David said to no one in particular. He stood at the head of the casket, and looked down at it for a long moment before taking a deep breath and spoke, not to the crowd, but as though to Rosemarie. Louis''s eyes burned.


    "Rosemarie," David said, "first, I swear I will finish the shelf. I think that your friends will help me fill them with books in your name."


    There was a sound of agreement and a couple whistles from Rosemarie¡¯s book club that actually made Louis''s lips quirk up. David smiled warmly at them in acknowledgment.


    "Second, I kept a secret from you. Did you know I played the guitar? Did Louis ever mention that? Anyway, though," he said, "I, uh, I know this was your favorite song and I thought¡ª" his voice cracked and he rubbed self consciously at the back of his neck. "I thought I should play it for you, at least once."


    David dropped the guitar bag from his shoulder and pulled off his gloves before taking out the instrument. David shook his hands to loosen them or warm them before playing a couple notes and correcting the pitch. His eyes met Louis''s and he could see something just short of panic in the bright blue.


    "You''ll have to forgive me for the mistakes. I don''t usually play for an audience," David said with a self-deprecating smile, then took a deep breath and strummed a chord. And another. Then a false one.


    ¡°Sorry,¡± he mumbled, then started again.


    And then he closed his eyes and he sang.


    Louis''s eyes burned at the sound of her song, the one he had always heard in her voice, now echoed in a deeper one. Louis could almost hear her voice in the melody, echoing the one verse she sang wrong every single time. Louis wondered if David realized that he''d done the same thing. He struggled to keep his breathing even as he listened.


    This was a gift, he knew, as much for him as it was for Rosemarie. He only wished Rosemarie had been alive to hear it.


    When the last wavering note on the guitar was stilled by David''s hands, Louis finally relented, tears streaming down his face. David''s eyes were wet, too, his nose red from the cold.


    "Thank you," David said quietly, resting his hand briefly on the wood of the casket before packing his guitar away again. There was a round of applause and a couple stifled sobs. David''s eyes remained determinedly fixed on the ground as he came to stand beside Louis once more.


    As the minister interred her to the ground, Louis could only press his arm against David¡¯s in thanks. David''s hand found its way back into his and Louis squeezed it.


    This story originates from a different website. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there.


    Throwing the first bit of earth on the grave was almost as hard as watching them take her body from the home she''d never return to again. This was really their last goodbye.


    There were muttered condolences and then the crowd of Rosemarie¡¯s loved ones slowly dispersed as the ground was covered by earth. Louis couldn¡¯t bring himself to leave, though, even as the casket was covered completely, even as the ground was filled to a soft mound, the dirt a stark scar amidst the blanket of white.


    It was almost surreal that she was gone. Louis couldn¡¯t quite wrap his head around it. It seemed almost like the world had stopped and Louis wasn''t entirely sure he was still here, either, even as a hand rested on his shoulder.


    Louis finally looked up from the grave to meet David''s gaze. He was openly crying, eyes even brighter than usual behind the tears.


    ¡°I¡¯m sorry,¡± David said. ¡°I¡¯m just really sorry.¡±


    ¡°Me too,¡± Louis said, looking back to the grave.


    David stood beside him for hours as the sun slowly set behind the cemetery and the cold seeped through him. Still, he couldn''t bring himself to leave and he was selfishly grateful that David didn''t either. But he knew it couldn''t last. The world hadn''t stopped, and they both had a reality to return to in the morning.


    "Well," Louis said, tilting his head back to look up at the stars just beginning to appear, "goodbye, Rosemarie."


    David didn''t say anything and Louis forced himself to look at him. This was more than just goodbye to his sister.


    "I guess this is goodbye for us, too," he said.


    "You''re making it sound like this is the end," David said.


    "Isn''t it?" Louis kept his gaze level and David''s brow furrowed.


    "It doesn''t have to be," David said. "I don''t want it to be. You have a phone."


    Louis nodded, knowing that their friendship would die out with distance and busy work schedules, just like the closeness they''d already lost.


    "You don''t agree," David said, his expression hurt. "So much for staying friends, huh?"


    Louis flinched, then felt a rush of irritation. "We''ve barely even been friends since we split up," Louis said. "Why try to keep up the pretense?"


    Louis was being unfair, but it was either push David away now or hold on and never let him go. There was no in between. No compromise. A clean break was all that Louis could give him, anything else and he would shatter and he didn¡¯t think he could put himself back together after that.


    Everything he''d had to give was in his letter and David had already made his choice, putting a wall up between them and, if there was a door, Louis hadn''t found it.


    ¡°I could go back to Weldstone Harbor, you know,¡± David said. ¡°I lived there for ages.¡±


    Louis scoffed, bitter that he wanted so desperately to take what David offered, even knowing how selfish that would be. ¡°You know that that¡¯s not where you belong. You still have half a season to film and, once that''s aired, they''ll ask you back for a third.¡±


    ¡°What makes you think I belong here?¡± David argued. ¡°I don¡¯t even have an apartment in Midtown. And if the series isn''t picked up again, what then?¡±


    Louis met David¡¯s eyes with a hard stare. ¡°Then you will find where you do belong, but it¡¯s not following me back to Weldstone Harbor over a brief friendship.¡±


    David''s expression turned into one of such anguish that Louis knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that David was just as in love as Louis was, even if he didn''t realize it himself. The fact that it didn''t matter anyway was enough to break Louis''s heart all over again and, with it, his remaining patience.


    "It''s getting late and I still have to pack," Louis said, turning to leave. He''d mad it five steps when David''s voice stopped him dead.


    ¡°If you don¡¯t want me around,¡± David said haltingly, ¡°then just say so. But don¡¯t pretend that it¡¯s for my own good. That¡¯s not yours to decide.¡±


    Louis felt like he was suffocating. His chest ached and he couldn''t find his breath.


    ¡°I care about you more than anyone else in the world,¡± Louis said, his voice breaking. He didn''t turn around. ¡°But I don¡¯t want to hold you back from what you can do, David, and I can¡¯t stay with you. That¡¯s not where I belong.¡±


    David let out a broken sob and Louis clenched his fists, forcing himself not to turn around again. He wished there was another answer, one that gave them both what they wanted and also let them stay together. He wished there was a choice that wouldn''t hurt this fucking bad. But there wasn''t.


    David had something here that would give him a chance to grow and to realize that it wasn''t Louis propping him up, but his own talent. Louis would return to what he knew and what he was good at and, if he was lucky, remember why he did it in the first place.


    It would be hard, and maybe a little more bitter than sweet, but they would persist. They would live.


    Louis forced his legs to move.


    "Louis!" David called after him.


    Louis didn''t look back.


    David didn''t follow.


    *****


    The house was empty. It was no more or less empty than it had been since Rosemarie died, but it felt more final now¡ªlike even the ghost of her was gone. And maybe it was. There was something of her presence that had lingered but was now gone. Like the eternal soul that she''d always believed in.


    His bags sat at the front door, already packed and ready to be loaded into a cab tomorrow morning.


    With nothing else to do, Louis wandered upstairs and poured himself a glass of water, standing idly by the stove until he''d finished it. He set the glass down in the sink then started to turn.


    Louis froze, looking back at the glass sitting alone in the sink. It hit him, then, that she''d never scold him for that again and it was suddenly too much to bear. His knuckles turned white where they gripped the counter, his head falling forward as he tried to keep himself from flying apart.


    She was gone.


    She was really gone.


    Louis slid down the counter until he was seated on the floor, his face buried in his arms. He forced himself to breathe, trying to remember that, even though she was gone, the world hadn''t stopped. There would still be another tomorrow.


    But the thought of it just broke loose a sob. He sat there and cried for he didn''t know how long before he forced himself off the floor, making his way to her room like a moth to a flame.


    He hadn''t been in there since she died, but he suddenly needed to be close to whatever was left of her, the familiar sights and the smell of her perfume.


    Louis opened the door slowly, feeling like he was entering some off-limits place. He practically tiptoed into the room.


    Nothing had changed in the last three days. It looked almost exactly as it had before she died.


    The only difference was the unmade bed.


    Louis shuffled over to it and carefully replaced the bedspread, stroking his hand over it until it lay smooth over the entirety of the bed, just like she''d always kept it, even on her worst days.


    He wasn¡¯t sure what he was going to do with the house. For now, it would just wait. Eventually, he would have to find someone to take care of it, because he didn''t think he could ever be in this place again without the profound emptiness of her absence smothering him.


    Once he had replaced the floral bedspread and fluffed the pillows, Louis took another look around the room, memorizing every inch of it just as she left it.


    The closet was full of all of the brightly colored scarves and blouses that she favored. There were more shoes than there was space for and her jewelry box overflowed with impractically large baubles that she seemed to collect for the joy of having them rather than the pleasure of wearing any of them.


    On her bedside, there was a copy of a romance novel, so well loved that it was missing half of its cover. Louis ran his fingers over the cover and sat down on the bed. A rush of her scent greeted him and he closed his eyes, inhaling deeply.


    He picked up the book and found a letter beneath it. Louis frowned, heart racing as he picked it up.


    It was a green and pink rose-print envelope with his name written in her neat cursive. Louis recognized it as part of a stationary set he got her for her 38th birthday. It was a gift she had rarely used because she insisted that such nice paper could only be used for special occasions. Seeing it now made him smile a little, even as he opened the envelope with shaking fingers.


    She''d written the note by hand in black ink, her handwriting soft and familiar across the page.


    My darling Louis,


    I am not good with words, and this is probably the hardest thing I¡¯ve ever had to write, so you¡¯ll have to excuse the tear splotches, they are as much out of frustration as grief.


    I thought a lot about what last words I wanted to leave you with, and I fell short.


    The most important thing that I need to say is just how much I love you and how proud I am of the man you¡¯ve become. I know that, even when I¡¯m gone, you will continue to make me proud, just as you always have.


    All of my most treasured memories are of the time you and I have spent together. Things weren''t always easy and our parents did a lot of things wrong, but I''ve always been grateful that they gave me you. I wouldn''t have changed that for the world.


    I have, unsurprisingly, left everything I own to you.


    I don¡¯t know what you¡¯ll do with it all, and I don¡¯t really care. One man¡¯s junk may be another¡¯s treasure, but the reverse is true, too. You have my blessing to get rid of that duck sculpture in the front hall. I know how much you hate it.


    Louis, if you need to sell the house, I want you to know that that¡¯s okay. I have loved nothing in this world as much as I love you and I hope that you¡¯ll carry that with you until we meet again. (Hush, I know you don¡¯t believe in the afterlife, but let¡¯s just pretend for now.)


    Don¡¯t miss me too much and don¡¯t forget to live while you¡¯re alive. I did, even in the end. Perhaps especially in the end, and that¡¯s one thing that I certainly don¡¯t regret.


    I am glad you found people around you who love you and who see you for who you are. I''m glad you found David, too. Don''t let go of the happiness you''ve found, Louis¡ªnot without a fight.


    While I had the chance, I wish more than anything that I had had your courage. I wish that I had been able to chase after what I wanted like you always have. That is one of the things I admire most about you, Lou.


    After I¡¯m gone, I want you to promise me one thing. Don¡¯t ever stop being you. The world is better with you in it.


    All my love,


    Rosemarie


    Louis carefully folded the letter back into its envelope and tucked it in his pocket. Even beyond the grave, she always seemed to know what Louis needed to hear.

 Chapter Twenty-Six

    It didn''t hit David until he arrived at work on Monday morning that Louis was really gone. His plane had left that morning and he''d gone so far as to break up with David again, this time as a friend.


    It was lucky that all of the scenes were appropriately grim or action packed enough to distract him from his thoughts. Otherwise, David suspected he might have done something stupid like buying a plane ticket to Weldstone Harbor so he could find Louis and... give him a piece of his mind or something. David''s impulsive plan hadn''t quite covered that part yet.


    Everyone knew you weren''t supposed to abandon your career to follow a boy. But David was sorely tempted to. He just wasn''t sure if he wanted to follow him so he could kiss him or push him into the harbor. The longer he thought about it, the more he was leaning towards both.


    Part of his dilemma was that he truly couldn''t understand why things had to end so completely. Not after he''d said something like, I care about you more than anyone else in the world. But he''d also said, I can''t stay with you, and that their brief friendship wasn''t worth trying for.


    It was enough to leave David''s head spinning and his heart aching.


    Louis talked like it was what was best for them¡ªwhat was best for David¡ªbut David was pretty sure it was just what was easiest for Louis. Like it was simpler to cutting ties and never look back than to actually work things out.


    The worst part was that David could understand that.


    David was all wrapped up in Midtown and in what must have been the worst time in Louis''s life. If Louis needed to put that behind him, David could understand that, even if it was unfair and even if it hurt like an itch in his veins.


    But he''d still said he cared about David more than anyone. And that had sounded too much like a confession for David to neatly write it off. Why say that when he was ending things? It just made everything hurt all the more.


    David didn''t think that Louis''s solution was the right solution. The time he spent with Louis was home and family and love all wrapped up together and David thought that was worth compromise. It was even worth some sacrifice.


    Their lives didn''t exactly line up perfectly, but David still wanted Louis. He wanted to work towards his own goals and ambitions and he wanted to be with Louis, too. He wanted to be with Louis forever and to share their lives and their achievements and their homes.


    Was it too selfish to want it all?


    Louis had a life in Weldstone Harbor with his friends and his spotless condo. David didn¡¯t have that kind of life anywhere¡ªhe had Jennifer and a string of studio apartments and an empty house where his parents purportedly lived but never were.


    It was like he and Louis lived on parallel trajectories. Or maybe it was like they were on perpendicular projections. They could touch, they did touch, but only for that one perfect moment before they went their separate ways, growing ever further apart.


    It ached.


    By the time he got back to the B&B it was already close to ten, but he wasn''t at all tired¡ªat least not in the way that allowed for sleep.


    Instead, David pulled out his guitar, and strummed a few chords, trying to decide what he wanted to play. In the end he just picked out a nonsense melody, thinking of the lyrics about Atlas and the king. He closed his eyes, humming along to the tune and imagining the lyrics in his mind. After a couple minutes, he thought he came up with something passable.


    He reached over to his bed side table only to realize that his notebook wasn¡¯t there.


    David reached over and opened the drawer to see if it had somehow ended up in there. It wasn¡¯t.


    Thinking on it, David couldn''t even remember the last time he''d scribbled anything in it or even seen it. It had been too much of a sore point since he and Louis broke up. Putting the guitar down, David hopped off the bed and searched through all of his pairs of jeans, inside his suitcase, in the magazine rack in the bathroom, and even in the sheets of the bed.


    He couldn¡¯t remember where he put it. The last time he had any clear memory of it was when Louis had put it in his hand, then held it tight, like he hadn''t really wanted to let go.


    Had he lost it after that? Had he put it somewhere out of the way? David didn''t remember any of that. If he was going to put it somewhere, though, it would be in his box of memories. David pulled the box out and emptied it on the bed, giving each item only a cursory glance, but, as expected, it wasn''t there.


    He spent the next two hours tearing apart the entire room trying to find it. Had he left somewhere at the studio? Or in Jennifer''s car? In Louis''s car? David''s heart sank.


    Finally, David gave up, shoving the lid back on his memory box and sliding it under the bed, muttering to himself as it got caught on a raised floorboard or something. He gave it another nudge but it caught again. David groaned and rolled off the bed onto the floor so he could properly return it to its place.


    He almost whooped in delight when he saw what it had gotten caught on. By the baseboard at the head of the bed was his notebook! It was splayed open and David fished it out with the toe of one of his sneakers until he could grab it by one flap of its cover. As he pulled it out, though, something else went spinning to the side, catching beneath the foot of the bed.


    A loose page?


    David picked it up with a frown.


    It was an envelope. A thick cream one with what felt like multiple pages inside. Was this from a previous tenant? Or maybe it was some survey David was told to fill out and never did?


    He flipped it over and felt the air in the room vanish.


    His name was on the envelope. In Louis''s messy print. Had it been in the notebook?


    David flipped it over again. It was his, right? It was addressed to him. So he was intended to read it, right?


    He felt nervous all of the sudden.


    The envelope was unsealed, the flap simply tucked in the back. David hesitated for a minute before opening it and pulling out the contents.


    There were three different kinds of paper¡ªodd, but maybe Louis had been writing it at different times?


    The first was a small sheet of green rose-print stationary that almost made David want to laugh. It was clearly something that belonged to Rosemarie. David ran his finger fondly over it, the emptiness of missing her still fresh.


    The second was an ancient piece of yellow legal paper, so worn that the lines were barely visible anymore.


    And the third was a white sheet that had clearly been torn from this very journal before David had been cast and he''d been so shocked at seeing Louis Greene that he''d started scribbling out a new copy of the song he''d given him so many years ago.


    How had Louis ended up with it?


    Putting that aside for a moment, David unfolded the page of legal paper. His heart skipped a beat as he realized what it was.


    He''d had this the whole time. Louis Greene had had this stupid page with David¡¯s stupid song on it since he was seven. He''d kept it.


    ¡°Christ, Lou,¡± David muttered, realizing he was crying only when dark splotches started appearing on the page. He''d kept David''s letter. David wasn''t sure what that meant, but it felt like it meant something. It felt like it meant a lot, really.


    David only gave it a cursory glance before flipping to the note Louis had left with the pages of David''s writing.


    David,


    First, I owe you another apology. I lied and I''m sorry for it.


    If you spot this narrative on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.


    It''s no excuse, but, at first, I was just curious about you. I found the second page at the studio and I thought that it sounded familiar, but there was no name. Jennifer let slip¡ªor hinted, as she does¡ªjust enough that I realized it was you and then the pieces all came together, but as I got to know you, I realized I liked you and I didn''t want this to change anything between us.


    Regardless, I should have been up front from the beginning, so consider this me coming clean.


    I got your letter right after my father passed away. I can''t explain how much I doubted myself and my choices at that point, but if anyone can, I think you''ll understand what I mean.


    Rosemarie had always been hesitant to let me pursue acting¡ªshe''s always worried about the lifestyles and choices that can come so easily with fame. When my father died, I wondered for the first time if I was wrong to want to do what I did. In fact, I was certain of it.


    That''s when I got your letter.


    I''d gotten fan mail before, but I wasn''t allowed to read a lot of it. It had to be pre-approved by both my agent and by Rosemarie. Even just for that, your letter was special to me. More than that, though, you gave me the courage to face my doubts.


    I''m not exaggerating when I say that you are probably the only reason I kept acting.


    I thought, if my character, dare I say, if I meant that much to someone, then maybe it wasn''t such a bad thing to be. Maybe it wasn''t going to take me away from Rosemarie or make me into something she didn''t want to talk about.


    I kept your letter until I left Starfly.


    For nearly ten years, you were my inspiration. After that, I got rid of everything that even reminded me of the show. My mother was incarcerated and Rosemarie was moving out to Midtown and I couldn¡¯t stand anything that reminded me of my childhood.


    I moved to Hollywood and then I moved to Weldstone Harbor. I didn¡¯t realize that Rosemarie had kept it until after we met. She''ll say it''s because she knows best and, on this occasion, I''ll capitulate. I''m grateful that she did and that I was able to meet you.


    You probably don''t realize it, but you saved my career for a second time when I met you. In a way, you saved me, too.


    The last year¡ªmaybe even longer than that¡ªhave been hard for me. Dark. I have come very close to giving up. I''ve been ready to give up, if I''m honest. I couldn''t remember why I did this when the world seemed to be telling me to quit.


    I never thought that I would enjoy being here¡ªtreasure it, even¡ªor that I would find something worthwhile working on television again after Starfly. I wasn''t even sure I could do it, but seeing your passion and your joy reminded me why I wanted to act.


    More than that, though, you reminded me what it was like to be alive. David, meeting you is the best thing that has ever happened to me. I know that I''ve fucked up and I hope you''ll forgive me, but even if you won''t, I want to thank you for everything that you''ve done for me.


    What I¡¯m trying to say is, regardless of what I wrote to you then, your letter, your music, and you meant the world to me.


    I¡¯m sorry I was such a little shit about it.


    All my love,


    Louis


    David flipped through the papers again, just to make sure he wasn¡¯t imagining it. Sure enough, written in his messy childish script was the original letter. He hadn¡¯t remembered exactly what he¡¯d written, but, seeing it now, he felt a little silly for being so caught up on Louis hating it. They were both kids. David had been too young to have understood rhyming let alone form. Why did it matter?


    David wiped his nose on the back of his hand, the hole in his chest widening.


    That was the problem, wasn''t it? It had never really been about the song. It was about Louis. It was about someone David admired, someone he loved, really, in that way that only children can love pushing him away.


    It hurt even more now that he was still being pushed away. Louis had kept the letter for ten years and he was still pushing David away.


    But Louis had kept the letter. David was the most important person in the world to him, by his own admission. He had signed the letter with all his love.


    So why did he keep saying one thing and doing another? Had he changed his mind? Why give him this letter and then break up with him immediately afterwards?


    Unless...


    Oh. Oh no.


    Why do that unless he hadn''t meant to break up with David?


    If Louis thought that David had broken up with him, just like Jennifer had assumed.... Oh, God. Louis thought David broke up with him after reading his letter. Louis thought that David had read thank you for everything and all my love and then said that it was too much and that he needed space.


    From that perspective, it really did seem like, if David wasn''t breaking up with him right then and there, he was pushing them in that direction.


    Because Louis didn''t know that David never read the letter.


    So he''d spent the last six months thinking that David''s response to his feelings¡ªhis love¡ªwas to put distance between them.


    Jennifer had been right. As usual. David should have just told him how he felt before it was too late. The lead weight that had settled in his stomach began to acquire an acidic property.


    "Shit," David said, scrubbing a hand through his hair.


    "Shit," he said again, with more feeling this time because the first one didn''t cut it.


    David pulled on his shoes and coat, pausing only long enough to grab his wallet and keys before sprinting downstairs. He had to find Louis. He didn''t know what he''d say or how he''d explain everything, but he needed to try.


    He was so wrapped up in pulling up the list of flights leaving for Weldstone Harbor in the next ten hours and trying to find a ride within a fifty mile radius, that he nearly ran straight into the silver hybrid parked beneath the lamppost.


    David blinked at it, dodging around the hood, then did a double-take. That was definitely Louis''s car. Here. In Midtown. Where it had not been when David got home from work.


    Still not quite believing it, David squinted at the windshield, trying to see past the glare of the lamp.


    The driver''s side door opened and Louis Greene stepped out of the car.


    "Going somewhere?" Louis asked, raising a brow.


    David stared, all coherent through leaving his brain.


    "David?" Louis asked, his tone turning a little hesitant.


    "No, I¡ª," David said, shaking his head slowly as he tried to snap himself out of his surprise. "You''re here. How are you here? Didn''t your plane leave this morning?"


    "It did," Louis said. "But I didn''t."


    "Oh," David said, still staring.


    He still hadn''t closed the door, holding it almost like a shield between them. David swallowed, eyes drawn to the movement of Louis''s thumb running up and down the edge. Was he nervous?


    ¡°May I come up for a minute? Unless you had other plans?¡± Louis asked. The timbre of his voice made David¡¯s toes curl, warmth and excitement spreading through him at the knowledge that Louis was here in front of him as though summoned by magic.


    "No," David said quickly. "I mean, yes. Or, no, I''m not going anywhere, yes, come up."


    Louis nodded, but his expression was guarded as he followed David silently up the stairs and down the hall. David opened the door to his room, feeling a little like Orpheus hearing the quiet footsteps behind him and wondering if it was really Louis or simply an illusion.


    When David finally closed the door behind them and turned his gaze to Louis, he was was caught off guard by the expression on his face. Louis looked like a kid about to be scolded which made David feel like he was about to be scolded. Or, at the very least, that he probably deserved a scolding.


    Not least because Louis''s gaze had dropped to the disarray of his room with a small frown. It did look a bit like he''d had a tornado over for dinner.


    "I need to explain something," David said at exactly the same time as Louis said, "I want to apologize."


    "Uh, I think that my explanation should come first. It''s really important," David said, scratching his head.


    Louis''s expression turned more cautious, but he nodded.


    David brushed past him, bending down to pick up the letter from where he''d dropped it on his bed. Louis''s cheeks flushed as he realized what it was and he didn''t meet David''s eye.


    "Louis, I never opened my journal after you gave it back," David said, his own face heating. "Not until tonight."


    He held up the pages, his throat dry. It wasn''t enough.


    "Never?" Louis asked, eyes tracking the movement of David''s hands as he fidgeted with the papers, and, okay, David probably deserved that disbelief.


    "I was embarrassed and I put the journal away. I never read your letter. I never even knew it existed until about an hour ago. I''m sorry." David swallowed, anxiety peaking as he watched Louis''s expression go carefully blank.


    "But you''ve read it now?"


    "Yes," David said, "and I realized how it must have seemed to you that morning. But I really didn''t know. I thought that, well, I thought you liked me, but I also thought you dumped me."


    "What do you mean?" Louis asked, irritation sharpening his tone. "You said it was too much and you needed time. What did that mean, then?"


    "I know!" David said, shaking his head. "I know I did, but at the time, I was trying to ask for time to consider our careers and everything else for more than twelve hours, not... not ask for time apart."


    "What are you saying?" Louis asked slowly, his expression starting to crack into something vulnerable that pulsed in David''s chest, too.


    David raised the pages again.


    "Do you¡ª" David cut himself off with a shake of his head. It was his turn to come clean. "I don''t know if you still feel the same, but if you do, I want to ask you for a second chance. And... to tell you that I love you."


    Louis wetted his lips then swallowed visibly and looked towards the window. David''s heart sank. Maybe it was already too late.


    "I didn''t want to give them back," Louis said, gesturing in David''s direction. "I regretted it afterwards. I wished I''d kept them so I could have at least kept a piece of you."


    "You can have them," David said slowly. "They''re yours, after all."


    Louis sucked in a breath, and when he turned back to David, his eyes were red and glassy and David couldn''t help but take a step towards him, an awful sort of hope welling inside him.


    "I didn''t even make it to the airport before turning around," Louis admitted. "I spent all day coming up with an excuse to see you again. Arguments for why you should ignore what I said yesterday and reasons we should still..." Louis cut off, looking up at the ceiling the corner of his mouth trembling.


    "Did you come up with any good ones?" David asked, the levity in his tone failing to cover the thickness of his voice.


    Louis let out a sharp laugh. "No. I couldn''t come up with a single one. I think you could probably do a lot better than me. You could find someone nice."


    David took another step forward. "But you came anyway."


    Louis nodded. "Yes. I couldn''t come up with a reason, but I''m not very altruistic."


    "You love me?" David asked, feeling a little light headed as he stepped close enough that he could count the laugh-lines at corners of Louis''s eyes.


    "Yes, David," Louis said, as though he was stating the obvious. Then his expression softened. "I love you."


    David reached out slowly, his fingertips rasping across the stubble over Louis''s jaw as he settled his palm against a pale. Louis''s eyes closed as he leaned into the touch, his lips parting just a little.


    "Then can we try again?" he whispered.


    Louis just nodded and David pulled him down into a kiss, the sheets of paper slipping from his hand to settle across the floor.

 Epilogue

    Two Years Later


    ¡°You promised,¡± David said. Louis rolled his eyes. He could hear David¡¯s pout even over the phone.


    ¡°I can¡¯t control the weather,¡± he said. He was currently sitting in the middle of Weldstone Harbor International Airport staring out at the freak storm as though he could glare it into submission.


    After two more seasons of Night Mist, David was finally done. It was a bittersweet ending, but more sweet than bitter as far as Louis was concerned.


    Louis had promised to come visit David after filming for his most recent movie ended. Louis was surprised to find that he was looking forward to visiting Midtown. David had agreed to move into Rosemarie''s old house after the first three months when Louis threatened him with a spreadsheet of expenses and a reminder that he still hadn''t finished the damn bookshelf.


    ¡°Well, now your surprise party is ruined,¡± David huffed.


    Louis rolled his eyes.


    ¡°Getting Jennifer to agree to have dinner is hardly a surprise party,¡± Louis said.


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    ¡°What do you mean? Who told you?¡± David demanded.


    ¡°Who do you think told me?¡±


    There was a muffled shout and then the sound of Jennifer¡¯s unrepentant explanation.


    ¡°I¡¯ll be there tomorrow, David,¡± Louis said, chuckling as David continued arguing half-heartedly with Jennifer.


    ¡°I want to see you now, though,¡± David whined. ¡°It¡¯s been three months! Three months. Three.¡±


    Louis was well aware of it. Louis counted down the days until he saw David like a kid waiting for his birthday to arrive. But they had made it work. And now it was almost at an end.


    If the damn hurricane warning would just go away.


    ¡°Maybe I should have come to Weldstone Harbor instead.¡±


    ¡°David, they wouldn¡¯t have let the plane land, either,¡± he said.


    David hummed in disagreement.


    ¡°Maybe, but I could have gotten to Nevada or something, then I could have driven there.¡±


    ¡°Driving in a hurricane is unwise,¡± Louis said slowly. Tempting, though. ¡°I¡¯ll see you tomorrow.¡±


    ¡°Yeah,¡± David said. ¡°Love you.¡±


    ¡°Love you, too, David.¡±


    Louis sat down on one of the benches, prepared to wait out the storm and be on the next flight to Midtown. His phone buzzed and a message from David popped up on the screen.


    Louis grinned at the picture of David and Jennifer. David was beaming and pointing at a cake that said Welcome Home while Jennifer was in the middle of saying something to David. To his surprise, Nabila was in the background laughing at both of them.


    Home.


    He hadn¡¯t thought of it as a home since Rosemarie¡¯s death, but maybe, just maybe, it was getting there again.