《Cat & Mouse》


 Cat & Mouse

    Cat: We¡¯ve been friends for a while now, right?


    Mouse: You know we have.


    Cat: Good friends.


    Mouse: Best friends!


    Cat: Best friends. But lately, I¡¯ve been feeling, I don¡¯t know. There are big parts of my life that I don¡¯t really share with you. There¡¯s stuff I wanna talk about, but since we don¡¯t really talk about it, it¡¯s gotten all built up and feels weird.


    Mouse: I see that you¡¯re struggling. You know you can tell me anything.


    Cat: I know. Ok. Well, I¡­ha, ha. I¡¯m nervous. I don¡¯t know why this feels like a confession, but, I kill mice. I kill and eat mice and I always have.


    Mouse: Ok.


    Cat: I don¡¯t do it all the time or anything, just when I need to, you know? I go out, hunt a mouse then eat it.


    Mouse: Ok.


    Cat: You know those business trips I go on?


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    Mouse: Yeah?


    Cat: Usually, I¡¯ll kill and eat a mouse. Kind of like business, ha-ha. I need to do it. Mice are so beautiful¨Ctheir movements are so fascinating. You know. We talk about our different species all the time.


    Mouse: I¡¯m having trouble processing this.


    Cat: Dammit? Have I scared you? You know I¡¯d never hurt you. Why do we have to go through this again?!


    Mouse: We don¡¯t. I know you would never eat me. I know that you¡¯re a good person, even if you do terrible things sometimes.


    Cat: I¡¯m glad you know I wouldn¡¯t hurt you. Uh, have I really done terrible things?


    Mouse: Yes! Killing mice is wrong.


    Cat: It¡¯s really not unnatural for carnivores¡­ I¡¯m a cat! It¡¯s probably normal to eat mice¨CI don¡¯t know! I feel like you¡¯re judging me.


    Mouse: I am judging you. You can tell me anything, but I can¡¯t help how I feel.


    Cat: This is so upsetting. You¡¯re looking at me like I¡¯m a monster. Am I a monster or am I just a normal cat?


    Mouse: I don¡¯t know!


    Cat: Are you scared? Please don¡¯t be scared.


    Mouse: I¡¯m not scared of you.


    Cat: It¡¯s not like I¡¯ve been, uh, biding my time with you, you know. We¡¯re friends. I like being friends with mice. I like mice, I like being around them¨Cwe¡¯ve talked about this. Haven¡¯t I always been perfectly civilized?


    Mouse: I feel like you¡¯re trying to gaslight me. I¡¯m not ok with this, and I¡¯m not going to be.


    Cat: What!? This is so upsetting. I can¡¯t believe you¡¯re reacting like this. Wait, sorry, I didn¡¯t mean it like that.


    Mouse: I want to¡­I kind of want to¡­ uh, I don¡¯t know.


    Cat: What?


    Mouse: I don¡¯t know! I can¡¯t force myself to talk and I can¡¯t change how I feel. But, um, I do know that I don¡¯t want to be around you right now.


    Cat: AAAh! I hate that you¡¯re scared of me!


    Mouse: I¡¯m not scared of you! I just need some space.


    Cat: Fine. I¡¯ll go away forever. Goddamn it¨C