《Lifeless Reincarnation》 Chapter 1 - An Empty life (1) Now Playing Dream Sweet In Sea Major - ¡®Alone at the edge of a universe humming a tune, for merely dreaming we were snow~¡¯ The smell of the ashy cigarette is still lingering in his room even when he opens the windows and smokes on the balcony. His room still has that ashy smell. Multiple finished cans of beer are thrown at the side, making it a huge pile. 2 or maybe 3 opened box cigarettes are scattered in there as well. The place looks like an absolute mess. It''s not suitable for a human to live, but Ash continues living like this. He ignores everything around him and increases the volume on his earbuds. ¡®A siren sounds like the goddess who Promises endless apologies of paradise¡¯ He looked at the evening sky, still drinking, still smoking, still playing that same damn album. ¡®And only she can make it right So things are different tonight¡¯ He wasn¡¯t sure how many cans of beer he had finished, but one thing he knows is that he isn¡¯t drunk. Obviously, if others saw him, no one would be convinced he isn¡¯t intoxicated since he has been drinking for 7 goddamn hours. Regardless of what people think, Ash still felt the same. No matter how many cigarettes he smokes, how much alcohol he consumes, or how many hours he listens to this album, the empty feeling is still there. The smoke felt empty, and the drink felt dry. He likes a dead man. His room doesn¡¯t even have any decoration; it¡¯s a big room with a futon on the floor and a pile of trash at the corner. There¡¯s a door to the bathroom and a sliding window to the balcony. That¡¯s it. Well, it''s more a studio than a room. It''s not like he can''t afford other types of accommodation; it''s just that this giant single room is what he prefers. No TV, no poster, no furniture, or anything like that; there is just a drawer where he kept his clothes, a motorcycle helmet, and a cat carrier that is thrown at the side. It''s a truly soulless and messy room. In his own kitchen, there is a single plate and a single type of utensil. His own source of entertainment comes from his phone, and he usually plays music on it. ¡®We''ll go together in flight¡¯ The black-haired man sighs once more as he looks at the time at the clock on the wall: 7 p.m.; he''s been smoking and drinking since 12 p.m. Knowing that, he kills his cigarette and sighs in frustration. He was hoping to at least feel something with all this drinking and smoking, but in the end it didn¡¯t work. He just ended up feeling more pathetic than ever. He can''t even escape from those empty feelings. Help support creative writers by finding and reading their stories on the original site. ¡°Fuck.¡± He mutters in a tired voice, he has a bunch of dark circles around his eyes, his black hair is messy and oily and so does his brown face. He looks like a mess. An absolute mess. ¡®It''s now and never A reverie endeavour Awaits somnambulant directives To take the helm¡¯ His ears perk up, listening to the song. He slowly swayed his head side to side, mumbling towards the lyrics of the song. ¡°Believe me, darling. The stars were made for falling like melting obelisks, as tall as another realm.¡± He slapped the skin of his feet to the beat of the music, his body slumping and swaying side to side. ¡®Un ensemble d''enfants La galaxie s''¨¦tend Jardin de l''imagination Combler la lacune Voler face ¨¤ la lune Vois comme nous ¨¦voluons¡¯ He loves this song; even when he listens to it all day long, he still loves it. Ash wasn¡¯t sure what this song is about, but he loves it regardless, since at least this song fills the empty void. Ash stopped swaying his head and slowly leaned at his walls and kept looking towards the sky. He''s tired, so deeply tired. It¡¯s already night, and he hasn¡¯t eaten anything nor gone outside of his room. His body is lethargic, his mind is fuzzy, and his stomach is growling. ¡°I¡¯m hungry.¡± He mutters and slowly gets up and drags his feet to go to the kitchen. He went to check the fridge, and lo and behold, he found absolutely nothing. His fridge is completely empty; he even finished his entire stock of beer that should last for a month. He sighs deeply and groans. He ponders for a bit, thinking where to eat, but then his thinking goes to a halt; his favourite song is reaching to the best part. He goes to the centre of his apartment and looks at his ceiling. He looks around his messy apartment and kicks a couple of trash on the floor. ¡®To know We are beyond a bow And lo, the hues arrange to show It''s perfectly clear¡¯ He makes some space to move around and sighs once again as he looks at his ceiling. Ash went to recall those dance lessons he had been taught years ago. He didn¡¯t want to join them back then; it was more like he was forced by someone. He thought he wouldn''t enjoy it, and back then he viewed them as girly and a waste of time. Now, he reminisces about those simple times. ¡®You look quite divine tonight Here among these vibrant lights¡¯ He was dancing to the beat of the song, his arm flailing around at the sky. He whirled around, still trying to intimate those dances he once taught. He put his foot forward and back again, humming to the music he danced to. Ash smiled. Pure delights surround us as we sail Signed, yours truly, the whale¡¯ He grabs an imaginary figure''s hand, dancing with the one he once knew in his mind. For a moment, only for a moment, he was sent back to it¡¯s childhood; he didn¡¯t have to care about anything nor hold any weight of responsibility. He was unaware of the world back then. It was just him and¡­ her. He let out a soft smile and closed his eyes as he continued to dance until the music ended. Slowly he opens his eyes, takes a deep breath, and sighs once more as he slicks his hair to the back. ¡°I should eat,¡± he mutters. His hunger was finally noticeable enough for him to make an effort to go out. Ash grabs his keys, his phone, his earbuds case, and his motorcycle helmet. He put on his jacket and gloves for a safety ride. As he is about to exit, he takes a last view of this dump of an apartment. There¡¯s mostly trash, but his eyes lock towards the cat carrier. ¡®Sometimes, I thought I heard your voice again¡­ Only to realize it was just a dream¡­ I''ll see you later, old friend.¡¯ He left his apartment. Chapter 2 - An Empty Life (2) Now playing Pale Machine - ¡®I''m feeling good, let''s say My emptiness has gone away¡¯ The sound of the motorcycle engine roaring through the street, he enters the highway where there''s multiple cars in the traffic, but Ash just slips past those cars without thinking much about it. Underneath his helmet, he was wearing his earphone and blasting music on it. It¡¯s actually not safe to drive a motorcycle while listening to music, but Ash does it anyway. He didn¡¯t care for his safety; even now he speeds through the road, going 90 KPH. ¡®Good morning, how''s the weather dear? My feelings are so clear¡¯ At first, he was planning to get something to bite, but for some reason the nightly drives felt different than usual. When he rode his bike, when he felt the wind hit his face, the taste of the air on his lips, the beat from his favourite song, Ash grip tightened at the throttle. He was going a bit faster than his usual speed. A much more dangerous and stupid idea enters Ash''s mind. He slowly twisted the throttle, 100 KPH. 105 KPH. He glances at the side mirror and notices there¡¯s no car behind him; he looks ahead, and there¡¯s an empty road. A complete empty road¡­ He knew this road well; there¡¯s no corner for the next 10 KM, another 10 if he just went completely straight. It''s just a straight-line road. Gear 4. He fully twists his throttle to its limit. ¡®Doing what you do, always Show me how to live¡¯ 130 KPH. Ash enters a dangerous territory. He never goes past the speed limit before; he usually obeys the laws. He usually would never do this. His heart was beating loudly; it''s like it''s trying to escape from his chest. He was not used to this amount of speed before. He let out a heavy breath, his eyes focusing on the road, and the music playing in his ear was blacked out. All he can hear is his engine roaring. ¡®What am I doing?¡¯ He thought to himself. ¡®I must have gone insane. Why? Why does this feel¡­ something?¡¯ He doesn¡¯t understand himself. He just twisted the throttle to its limits. He finally felt... something for once. 150 KPH. He wants to go even faster. Gear 5. This adrenaline he is feeling¡ªit¡¯s been a long time since he felt this. ¡®Faster.¡¯ 180 KPH. ¡°FASTER!¡± He shouted at the empty road. This story originates from Royal Road. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there. Gear 6. The speedometer went to an even faster height. He didn¡¯t care anymore. He is going beyond faster than he used to ride. He passed by numerous cars, trucks, and other bikes. He didn¡¯t care for anything. He just wants to forget everything. 210 KPH. To forget this suffering, to forget his pain, to forget about his existence, and to never exist in the first place. He simply wants this to end. 220 KPH He finally reaches the speed limit of his bike; he laughs at the speed he is going. It¡¯s been a long time; maybe it¡¯s the high or maybe it¡¯s the adrenaline; Ash didn¡¯t care anymore. Slowly he let go of the throttle, opened his arms, and felt the gush of wind hitting him; it¡¯s truly ¡°Rejuvenating.¡± Ash chuckled as he closed his eyes. ¡®####¡¯ ¡®L##e¡¯ ¡®Live.¡¯ a soft voice whispered to him. His eyes immediately wide open; he grabbed back the handlebar and hit the back brakes. The motorcycle violently shook; he quickly lowered the gear, but because of the speed, it doesn''t matter what Ash does; he has lost control. He hit both breaks at the same time, but the road felt slippery. A sound of the tyre left a burn mark on the road. He got thrown at the side with his bike as well. Luckily for him, the side of the road has a patch of grass and dirt. He slid on the ground, the same as his bike. A loud ring echoes in his ears. Ash clutches his chest tightly. He tries to breathe, but his chest feels too tight; the air won''t go into his lungs, and Ash''s body couldn''t help but panic. He frantically grabs the buckle of his helmet, trying to forcefully remove his helmet off his face. "FUCK!" He curses as he finally manages to throw the helmet away from his head. He tries so hard to breathe that even when he removes his helmet, he is still out of breath. His breathing got more and more shallow. ¡°Fuck, damn it!¡± He shouted as he slammed his fist at his chest. He hates this; his long past still haunts him. He hates it. He slammed his chest again and again; he hated this, and with a fit of rage, he slammed his fist at his chest again. "FUCKING BREATH!" He shouted and coughed violently and was finally able to taste the fresh air. He violently coughs, a clump of blood spat out of his mouth, and Ash clutches the dirt on the ground with deep rage. He hates this; he hates how pathetic he feels; he hates this; he can¡¯t even breathe properly; he hates this; he just wants to forget about it but he couldn''t. This is his curse. Even when so many years have passed, Ash''s past still haunts him. He hates this so much; he bites his lower lips in anger, his grip on the dirt tightens, and he clenches his hand to a fist and punches to the ground. He punched the dirt on the ground, punched, punched, and punched. He was so angry, about everything but mostly about himself. His knuckle kept slamming at the dirt; there was no effect for doing this; nothing will change if he does so, but Ash has lost all rationality. He has lost his emotions to his anger; he didn''t even bother about the crash he just had. All he''s thinking is the deep rage he''s feeling. ¡°FUCK!!!¡± He screams as he slams his knuckle once more. He panted heavily as he looked at the ground; his eyes were in deep sorrow. ¡®Close your eyes, you''ll be here soon.¡¯ The sudden sound of the song coming to his ears makes him stop at the moment. He pauses and lets out a short breath. ¡®Tokidoki hont¨­ni netai Demo kono w¨¡do dekinai¡¯ Slowly, Ash''s anger died down; his fury on the ground stopped. He let out a few deep breaths to calm himself. He clenches his hand to a fist in a tight manner but soon softens and sighs as he relaxes his hand. He took another deep breath and looked around at the street, and sure enough, no one was there. He is all alone, sitting on the ground with very little scar. His lethargic body felt awful; he could feel the swelling pain, but he chose to ignore it. He stares at the starless skies for a bit and takes a deep breath. He caresses his face with his palm and sighs deeply as he views the starless skies once more. He slowly stood up but fell back to his ass. He looked at his condition, and sure enough, he was fine. Thanks to his clothes, he had avoided many injuries. Ash wasn¡¯t sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing. He chuckled a bit, smiling at his own patheticness. ¡®Oyasumi, oyasumi Close your eyes and you''ll leave this dream Oyasumi, oyasumi I know that it''s hard to do¡¯ The song played loudly in his ears, blocking any thoughts he currently had. His laugh subside and he sighs deeply. He got back to his feet once again and slowly dragged his body to check on his bike condition. The bike crashed on the grass; thankfully, it still worked. He stood the bike up, set the bike to neutral, fixed the broken side mirror, and checked on his bike condition. There were scratches everywhere, but it still worked. He turned on the engine, and sure enough it didn¡¯t explode. He sighs as he drags the bike back to the road. He went on to check on his stuff and put back his helmet. He looks at the road ahead, and the highway is empty as ever. There was no one there, only Ash. Ash revs up the engine once more, and this time, slowly drives away. ''Oyasumi, oyasumi Close your eyes and you''ll leave this dream Oyasumi, oyasumi I know that it''s hard to do Oyasumi, oyasumi Close your eyes and you''ll leave this dream Oyasumi, Oyasumi I know that it''s hard to do'' Ash mumbles to the song; he obeys the speed limit this time, driving alone on this empty street. He empty his mind, empty his emotion; there¡¯s not a single thought in his head, just the music playing in his earphone.