《I'm the Villain's Savior》


 Chapter 1 - My Love For A Fictional Character

    My first love is a fictional character.


    A marvelous hero, with a chiseled face and a noble heart, saving the world with his sense of justice. His name is the illustrious Luke Florence. He is the protagonist of the novel ¡°The Return of the Savior¡±.


    In the eyes of others, it may seem pitiful for an adult, like me, to be deeply infatuated with a fictional character and indulge in love''s yearnings. I know, it may appear pathetic. But... the heart is not something easily controlled, is it? Just by imagining Luke with his blond hair and blue eyes, my heart flutters and dances with excitement.


    Yet, to my dismay, it was evident that the author of this novel did not hold an affinity for Luke.


    Shouldn''t the protagonist vanquish all the forces of evil, as befitting a protagonist?


    However, our Luke endures hardships without the aid of any protagonist''s blessings. It is the epitome of the art of manipulation. When Luke faces a formidable villain and keenly feels the immense difference in strength, struggling in hopeless frustration, I too shed tears of sorrow.


    That despicable son of an antagonist, Kamian Delros Hespyon. The prince of the underworld and the most powerful being in the universe. He is someone from whom one cannot expect any kindness. His actions are so wicked and ruthless that all the characters that come into view are mercilessly slain. Even the companions of the protagonist have all been annihilated by him.


    The author favors the grand villain, Kamian, it is an assumption with a solid basis. How else can one explain the intricacies and extensive details of the antagonist''s narrative? Kamian''s backstory alone was a staggering 90 pages longer than Luke''s.


    Here is its content: Prince Kamian of the underworld descends upon the human realm, summoned by a seven-year-old girl. Despite openly looking down upon her as an inherently sickly human with limited time left, Kamian gradually opens his heart due to the unyielding innocence and unblemished attitude of the contracted girl, ''Liv.''


    "You gaze at me with such envy that it could kill, but why don''t you go outside and play as well?"


    "It''s okay. I get exhausted after running just ten steps, and the kids would mock me. Besides, I''m not envious at all. I have you by my side, Kamian."


    "...."


    "Just as you are everything in my little world, I hope I can be something special to you too."


    "Don''t get lost in unnecessary sentiments. Instead, ponder on how to become healthier than yesterday."


    "Before, I resented being in pain to the point of wanting to die. But ever since I met you, even pain feels quite bearable. Every day, you hold my hand and exercise with me."


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    "...."


    "Good heavens, the two of them caused quite a commotion. I couldn''t help but be astonished when I read the vivid depiction of Kamian''s ears turning red at Liv''s words. In the previous episode, just before this particular scene, Kamian had obliterated an entire kingdom.


    Our protagonist, Luke, who wields his sword with unwavering integrity, has never experienced an ordinary love in the novel. On the other hand, Kamian indulges in all sorts of thrilling exploits and spends idyllic days.


    Kamian and Liv, who maintained a tender and tingling relationship, only confirm their feelings for each other after becoming adults. However, their happiness is short-lived. In the end, Liv succumbs to illness, leaving a pale face buried in the ground like a white lily.


    Overwhelmed by the unbearable sorrow of losing the one he loves, Kamian goes on a rampage. Wherever his lifeless eyes gaze, ruins replace what once stood, and the scent of slaughtered flesh lingers in the air.


    "Killing ten thousand people is such a simple task, yet why couldn''t I save you alone?"


    Thus, the main plot of the novel unfolds as Luke confronts Kamian in order to protect the world. However, dear author, the balance seems askew.


    No matter how strenuous Luke''s training is or how he arms himself with various rare magical items, standing before Kamian renders him as feeble as a gnat.


    There is no hope in this novel, nor anything else of substance.


    Merely the appearance of Kamian instills tension not only in Luke but also in the reader, like an entity from another dimension... How can one possibly defeat a character who has been amplified to such an extreme?


    It is impossible to kill Kamian. I know it, and all the extras who appear in the book know it as well, except for our clueless Luke, who is grappling with it all alone. How can my heart not be torn to pieces?


    "[Sigh] If only I could enter the world of the book, I would do whatever it takes to prevent Kamian''s descent into darkness."


    Did my heartfelt longing for Luke''s happiness reach the heavens? I have truly become intertwined with the characters in the novel. And to make matters worse, it''s during the period before the villainous Kamian succumbs to darkness."


    * * *


    "To eat or not to eat," he uttered in Korean, lifting his spoon and bringing it close to his lips. I gazed at the spoon with unease.


    "Ah, saliva..."


    "Ah, yes."


    The stubborn spoon playfully nudged my lips. Reluctantly, I had no choice but to open my mouth.


    "You won''t be able to leave until you finish every last bit, my dear."


    With a gruff tone, this character meticulously attended to my meal. He was none other than the prince of darkness, the formidable villain I encountered in the novel I was reading¡ªKamian.


    "Did you think I wouldn''t eat it all even without you saying anything?"


    I consumed the stew more aggressively than before. Kamian smirked, slightly delayed, and finally began his own meal.


    "It''s only Kamian who takes care of our livelihood, Liv. Will you not accept his affections in return?"


    Liv''s aunt, Debra, and her uncle, Jex, beamed with satisfaction. Debra set aside the plate with the stew and rested her chin in her hands, openly indulging in the moment.


    "Stop with those dreadful words. Have I gone mad?"


    Kamian swiftly finished his meal, placing the spoon forcefully on the table. Debra''s eyes widened at Kamian''s assertive tone.


    "If only Kamian could be a little more honest..."


    "How could I be any more honest than this?"


    I inwardly scoffed at Kamian''s words. Everyone knows that you like me, Liv, including Debra, Jex, and me. It was absurd for him to pretend it was his own perfect secret.


    "It''s impossible. Ah, yes."


    Kamian snatched away my bowl. Apparently, he had caught me briefly lost in thought, stirring the stew with my spoon. He was a terrifying person. After spending fifteen years together, I had learned a thing or two about him. No matter what anyone says, Kamian''s stubbornness cannot be changed. I sighed and reluctantly opened my mouth.

 Chapter 2 - Every Night鈥檚 Dream

    Fifteen years had passed.


    It seemed like an eternity since I had become the young contractor of Kamian, the one who would darken Kamian through death, as the vessel of ''Riev Klein.''


    When I first opened my eyes, I was utterly bewildered. As I awoke from my slumber, a dark tempest raged before me, and in the midst of it all, a noble young boy stood, pressing his lips against the back of my hand.


    "The contract has been sealed, human."


    It was Riev Klein, the seven-year-old who had made the initial contract with Kamian.


    To the young Riev, the most trivial wish granted by the mightiest of beings in the universe was to have a true friend.


    "Please, become a dear friend to me."


    With a fragile body that couldn''t keep up with peers, Riev had always yearned for friendship. It was during that search that he happened upon a demon-summoning spell within the pages of a book. And fate, in its twisted design, led him to Kamian.


    As I reflected on the past fifteen years, I couldn''t help but think about the immense suffering I had endured.


    Unable to accept the circumstances of my possession, I spent each day in a daze, repeatedly slapping my cheeks with the hope that it was all just a dream. Then, I searched for a way to return home. However, in this rural village, where the only things present were fields, meadows, and goats, it proved impossible to find any helpful information.


    Ignorantly persisting in my futile attempts for five long years, my hope gradually faded. At that point, my health deteriorated rapidly. I experienced nosebleeds as if they were morning greetings, and my body boiled with fever, causing me to lose consciousness for days on end.


    With each breath I exhaled, it felt as if my life was being ruthlessly drained away. The blood I coughed up stained my lips and clothes, and each time it scattered on the sheets, the terror of death pounded against my bones and flesh.


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    It felt as though a venomous blade was tearing through my entire body, and the venom seeped into the open wounds, melting away the flesh.


    The fear of death, mixed with a desperate longing for a mercy killing, surged every minute and second. My brain couldn''t overcome the agony, and my consciousness would snap, only to be submerged in the horrific pain that restarted when I resurfaced from the abyss. In my mind, a despairing image of myself, pathetically dying in an unfamiliar world, was vividly depicted.


    In the midst of my suffering and convulsions, it was Kamian who cared for me with utmost sincerity. Tirelessly wiping my body with cold towels to lower the fever, feeding me, and cleaning up the blood I vomited and the uneaten food I couldn''t swallow.


    When it was time for me to take medicine every hour, Kamian would place the pill in my mouth, not even letting out a sigh, acting as my personal alarm clock.


    My shattered body and mind naturally leaned on Kamian for support. If he didn''t look after me, it felt as though I would be sucked into an eternal tormenting hell.


    Whether it was because I never gave up the will to live, or because Kamian took care of me with utmost sincerity, or perhaps it wasn''t yet time for Liv to die... somehow, I gradually regained my health.


    After enduring a near-death agony, I sensed a transformation within me.


    Ever since the book merged with my being, the turmoil that plagued my mind subsided and tranquility settled in. I had a firm conviction that my entry into this book world was not the result of a bizarre accident, but rather, there was undoubtedly a clear and definite reason behind it.


    And in my unwavering pursuit of uncovering that reason, I had the same dream every night. A dream where I, "Lee Hee-Won," existed instead of Liv.


    Although the setting of the dream shifted slightly, the words repeated by the dream version of myself remained the same each time.


    "If only I could enter the book and do whatever it takes to prevent Kamian''s corruption."


    "..."


    Could it be? Is that the answer?


    My mind suddenly cleared, as if someone had doused it with a bucket of icy water. Although lingering doubts still resided in my mind, which were difficult to accept as the sole explanation, every cell within me shouted that it was indeed the right answer.


    From the moment I realized this, I never had that dream again.


    Yes. Let''s try to prevent those. It might be the only way for me to return to reality. Like a quest that can only be completed by fulfilling the given conditions.

 Chapter 3 - At School

    "After a solemn vow, another ten years passed, and now we find ourselves in this state.


    "Lean on me."


    Kamian lowered himself in front of me, showing his back. It had been a long time since I had become accustomed to resting my body on his broad back.


    "Leave."


    Every time Kamian spoke, a warm resonance could be felt where our backs met.


    "Why?"


    "You didn''t do your theology assignment, did you?"


    Leaning my cheek against his comfortably stretched shoulder, I suddenly turned my head.


    "Did you have an assignment? Why didn''t you tell me?"


    "You didn''t ask."


    "How am I supposed to ask about something I don''t know? Oh, it''s truly exasperating."


    I pressed my forehead with aching betrayal. This child... only thinks of himself. I exerted strength on the arm that was lightly embracing Kamian''s neck. Despite squeezing his throat with all my might, Kamian simply chuckled without showing any signs of difficulty. In the end, I was the one who grew exhausted and faltered first.


    "Go and copy it then."


    "Hey, then go quickly. Hurry!"


    When I lightly tapped his thigh with my leg, my head tilted slightly backward. At the same time, a chilly breeze blew over my face. I told him to go quickly, but it didn''t mean I wanted him to literally run away!


    Afraid that my body would fall backward, I hastily pulled him close. The swiftly flowing stream between the overgrown weeds and the dirt path passed by quickly. We ran without stopping, covering the distance that would normally take an hour of walking.


    Not far away, the academy building came into view. Kamian finally stopped and let me down.


    "Start counting from 100."


    He casually nodded and waved his hand dismissively. I understood, so I hurried off. Kamian left me behind and briskly walked away on his own. I counted silently as his black silhouette grew distant: 1, 2, 3...


    We engaged in such behavior for a rather childish reason.


    Due to my weak physical condition, I couldn''t walk long distances, so Kamian carried me on his back every day to school. When our fellow academy students saw us like this, they made jokes, asking if we were a couple or if we planned to have our wedding ceremony at the temple. Kamian''s face turned completely red, and he quickly left the scene.


    And that evening, he unexpectedly entered my bedroom after dinner and said, "Starting tomorrow, we''ll go to school separately."


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    That child, he''s so shy.


    "I know everything you like. Truly."


    Having read the novel beforehand, I knew that, even without that knowledge, Kamian was incapable of concealing my love. Well, in his own way, he would tic-tic and pretend not to, but he did. However, no matter how hard he tried to contain the emotions that built up and overflowed like an explosive, it was futile. It would seep out from any crevice eventually, that''s for sure.


    According to the original story, when they both turned eighteen, Kamian and Liv confirmed their love for each other and became lovers. However, as someone burdened with a mission akin to preventing Kamian''s corruption, I decided to feign ignorance of his affection.


    Someone might raise their eyebrows, questioning the correlation between pretending not to know his affection and preventing corruption. Nonsense. Not entering into a romantic relationship with him is precisely the key to completing this quest.


    Even if I, as "Liv," were to die, it should be remembered that as long as Kamian does not succumb to corruption, the quest is considered a success.


    I didn''t want to entertain the thought of the worst-case scenario, but I still needed to prepare. So, I pondered, "What if I were to die as in the original?"


    It''s not that I desired a tragic ending... but I arrived at the conclusion that the death of a neighborhood friend would be less agonizing than the death of a beloved partner. If Kamian doesn''t harbor emotions for me beyond friendship, he may mourn my death but it won''t lead to corruption.


    Hence, I tirelessly strived to maintain a friendship with him.


    However, despite the lack of similarities between the Liv in the novel and myself in terms of speech and personality, Kamian, like clockwork, ended up developing feelings beyond friendship for "Liv" as if it were preordained. Damn it. Is it impossible to alter the course of the original?


    Nevertheless, all hope wasn''t lost.


    Although Kamian couldn''t prevent himself from harboring an affinity for me, unlike in the novel, we continued to maintain a superficial friendship even after becoming adults.


    "It must have been over a hundred seconds by now."


    I strolled nonchalantly to the academy. Near the main entrance, I encountered familiar faces and greeted them warmly before entering the lecture hall.


    As if possessed, Kamian raised an eyebrow and stared at me intently. When I stood still, he gestured towards the seat next to him.


    ...Why do you insist on sticking so close and yet arrive separately for school? This way, I can''t help but know your feelings. You might as well write on your forehead that you like me, right? Tsk. I clicked my tongue briefly and turned my gaze towards Kamian. After all, I had to copy the assignment anyway.


    "May I sit here?"


    However, before I could even move to his side, the seat was already occupied. Blair''s tightly bound red hair, flowing like flames, swung in front of me. It seemed like she had jumped over to sit next to Kamian. Since it was a common occurrence, I didn''t panic and calmly took a seat behind Kamian. Then, I reached out and gently pressed my hand on the fellow''s shoulder, conveying the message to sit quietly without moving to my seat.


    Kamian turned around with an uneasy expression on her face.


    "Show me your assignment."


    "...."


    "Quickly."


    With a small sigh, a theological textbook was placed on my hand. Instead of expressing gratitude, I wrinkled my nose, and Kamian reluctantly glanced at me, then straightened her body.


    I gazed at the back of Kamian''s jet-black head. It was unbelievable that such a revealing soul could transform into a merciless villain who slaughtered humans. The dissonance I felt from the Kamian I had seen in novels and the Kamian who was upset about not being able to sit in the adjacent seat was tremendous.


    Perhaps because Kamian''s desired wish was a "good friend" as requested by "Liv," she grew up steadfastly like my childhood friend. Sometimes, I even forget that this guy was a demon. It''s only natural since he has never used magic before and eats three meals a day just like a human.

 Chapter 4 - First Love

    Ah, if there is something not human about him, it would be his handsome face and well-built physique. Although I promised to spend time with Kamian like a friend, there are times when my heart beats uncontrollably when I see his face. It''s inevitable, just like how your leg involuntarily lifts when you hit the spot below your knee.


    Sensing my intense gaze, Kamian''s head turned towards me. Before our eyes could meet, he quickly averted his gaze and pretended to work on his assignment. Just in case he misunderstood that I was interested in him.


    At that moment, someone tapped me on the back with a morning greeting. I recognized the owner of the hand that had touched my back just by hearing the voice.


    "Hello, Li... What? Theological assignment?"


    "Hello, Tessa. Hurry and copy."


    I pushed Kamian''s textbook to the center. Tessa let out a fresh scream and joined me enthusiastically in copying Kamian''s assignment.


    "Oh, my hand is going to fall off."


    Despite crying, she didn''t stop writing. While hastily copying the assignment, she suddenly realized that my textbook had disappeared. Huh? In the blink of an eye, even the pen had vanished. What the... I raised my head in surprise. Kamian was holding my textbook in his hand and swiftly twirling the pen with one hand.


    "Don''t you have time to play around? Give it back quickly."


    Kamian narrowed his eyes and brought the textbook close to his face, then dropped it back and forth.


    "What if I draw worms instead of writing?"


    "Give it back."


    He smirked and finally took my textbook to his own desk. Ah, I''m running out of time. I was infuriated. With my face all scratched up, I walked all the way to Kamian''s desk, but he was already doing my assignment for me.


    As Tessa was copying Kamian''s textbook, I let that go for now and began solving the problems with my own mind. Even if it was a problem I had solved before, there were a few places that could be confusing, but Kamian smoothly wrote down the process of solving it. With a straight and neat handwriting.


    Can a demon be so good at theology?


    "Well, I won''t do it a second time."


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    Feeling somewhat grateful and embarrassed


    Words spilled out abruptly. Without waiting for Kamian''s scolding, I snatched the textbook and returned to my seat as if seizing a prize. Tessa, too, must have finished copying the assignment, for she leaned back on the desk, stroking her wrist.


    "By the way, did you hear?" she asked.


    "Hmm?"


    "We''re getting a new professor next semester. A young one. Teaching martial arts. Isn''t it astonishing? It''s already surprising to have a young professor in this rural area, but to have a newly established martial arts course as well."


    "Ah..."


    Tessa seemed dissatisfied with my lukewarm response. Poking at her forearm with her finger, she inquired, "Aren''t you surprised? Have your emotions died down? Were you perhaps made of straw?"


    I had to muster the reaction Tessa wanted, even if it meant forcing it. But all I could do was bow my head in silence.


    I knew all too well who the incoming martial arts professor was. It wasn''t just knowing their name¡ªI knew their family background, closest comrades, favorite food, and even their tender-hearted affection for weak animals, in extraordinary detail.


    The incoming professor was none other than Luke Florence. The mere thought of seeing him sent my heart pounding uncontrollably.


    Finally, I would behold my first love.


    My feet refused to stay still, constantly tapping against the floor. Overwhelmed by the surging excitement threatening to burst from my mouth, I eventually had to lie down, concealing my face.


    * * *


    "Huh-uhmp!"


    His arms swung fiercely. With clenched jaws and beads of sweat trickling down his neck, he exerted all his strength.


    "If I hear that fierce cry, I''d think you''re lifting an entire house."


    She couldn''t utter a word against Kamian''s mocking, for she struggled to balance the basket of potatoes precariously atop her head. Kamian, seated on the bench with her long legs stretched out, was chewing on an apple. Her protruding leg snapped in response to my heavy breathing.


    "Take it easy. If you keep going like this, you''ll burst blood vessels on your face, just like last time."


    "Ah, ugh..."


    I wanted to say ''damn.'' Just then, Kamian tossed the bitten apple toward me. As the apple precisely landed inside the basket, I, barely maintaining my balance, wavered without a trace of composure under the weight of half an apple. And...


    Clang! Eight potatoes from the basket rolled out in a tumble. I remained in the fallen position, staring intently at Kamian without making any attempt to get up.


    "If you''re going to be a hindrance, then stay indoors!"


    I suffer all this hardship because of you, you scoundrel! You wouldn''t have a moment''s peace if it weren''t for me. However, Kamian, who knows nothing of my inner turmoil, approached me with a smile on her lips. His large hand slid gently between my armpits, and I felt my body being lifted effortlessly.


    "Take it easy. Today is the day, you know."

 Chapter 5 - Agreement

    Kamian lifted me up and gently wrapped his hands around my trembling arm. As I looked at my arm tightly held within his grasp, a sigh escaped my lips. Despite my lack of appetite, I diligently nourished myself with meals and exercised daily, but this cursed body of mine clung only to the bare minimum of fat and muscle required for survival.


    "I understand," I murmured softly.


    As my tensed muscles slowly relaxed, my head began to spin. Leaning my forehead against Kamian''s chest, I took a slow breath. Kamian continued to caress my arm without pausing, whispering affectionately.


    "Shall I hold you?"


    "It''s alright. There will come a time when you make me fall."


    I exerted force on my head and pressed it firmly against his chest before releasing it. Walking towards the bench where Kamian had been lying earlier, I stretched my body out in the same position. Compared to Kamian, whose long legs extended well beyond the bench, my legs barely reached my ankles.


    "Go inside and rest. If you sweat and catch a cold in this chilly breeze, it won''t do."


    Kamian carefully gathered the spilled potatoes and placed them neatly in the basket beside the bench, lightly tapping my stomach.


    The wind gently rustling my hair felt just right for falling asleep. However, at the mention of a cold, my eyes snapped open. With an immune system resembling thin ice, my feeble body was prone to succumbing to even the mildest cold virus.


    As I reached out my hand, Kamian skillfully supported the back of my neck, helping me to rise. I walked past Kamian without a word and headed towards home.


    In the moment of reaching for the doorknob, an uneasiness grazed my skin. When I turned around, I saw Kamian still standing near the bench. Under normal circumstances, he would be like a shadow, following closely behind me, or sticking by my side, lightly brushing the back of my hand. It was only natural that something seemed amiss.


    "Aren''t you coming in?"


    The sun was slowly tilting towards the west. A reddish hue spread across the sky, resembling watercolor along the trajectory of the sun. Under the twilight, Kamian''s crimson eyes emitted a peculiar glow.


    "I need to go to Mr. Corner''s farm. The fence is broken again."


    Kamian stretched his arms behind his shoulders and lazily stretched, causing his shirt, perfectly fitted to his body, to tighten and, with a sudden snap, the button near his chest flew off.


    As his navy-blue shirt loosened, his firm chest muscles jutted out.


    "Oh..."


    Kamian picked up two fallen buttons from the ground and roughly ran his fingers through his hair.


    "Just need to sew these back on."


    His actions caught my attention. Seems like all the muscles in my body were drawn to him.


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    "Well then, let me wash up and we can go together."


    "No, it''s not a good idea. It''ll get colder if we go out."


    "If we layer on three or four layers, it''ll be fine. I also want to see how much the baby goats have grown after such a long time."


    Kamian didn''t respond and started walking to where I stood. Then he reached out and overlapped his hand with mine, pulling the door open.


    From my fifteen years of experience, silence was never allowed. So I followed Kamian, pretending not to know, and said, "Am I going too? Huh? You don''t need to give me permission to go. If I want to go, I''ll go." I glanced at Kamian, waiting for his reaction. However, Kamian firmly sealed his lips and focused on threading the needle to sew the button. Well, he''s resolute.


    I lightly patted his bare back with the palm of my hand. The flexing muscles on his back twitched. After putting down the shirt that Kamian was holding, he turned around and embraced me all at once. My arms naturally wrapped around Kamian''s neck.


    "Let go?"


    "Don''t walk around the house all sweaty. Go wash up."


    Kamian put me down in the bathroom and slammed the door shut. Curious if there was any smell, I sniffed my arm. There was a faint smell of sweat.


    "...I guess I should wash up."


    After thoroughly washing every nook and cranny of my body, I put on several layers of clothing. Even though I wrapped myself tightly with clothes, I still felt the chilling cold as soon as I stepped out of the bathroom. With my teeth clenched, I occasionally jogged to the bedroom.


    Just as I was about to burrow into the covers, a note was caught on my fingertips.


    ¡°Don''t lie down until your hair is dry.¡±


    The neat handwriting, resembling a textbook, was undoubtedly Kamian''s. Always nagging. I was about to throw away the note when I noticed there was something written below it.


    ¡°We''ll have dinner at Mr. Corner''s place and be back. Don''t wait for me. See you later.¡±


    "Wow... This guy really went alone."


    I crumpled the note under my hand with a pathetic sound.


    "He just randomly went to the farm?"


    I clenched my fists tightly but quickly gave up.


    I knew very well that Kamian didn''t go alone because he was annoyed with me or considered me a burden. If it weren''t for today, I would have just put on thicker clothes and gone to the farm together. Kamian also liked having me by his side.


    "That day referred to the secretive act between Liv and Kamian, where they exchanged a predetermined price for their agreement.


    In exchange for granting human wishes, demons gained ownership of their souls after death. These souls could be consumed as a source of magical energy or combined with the bodies of other demons to create powerful soldiers. The uses were varied. However, the crucial point was that once the ownership of a soul was transferred, it lost its sense of self and eventually perished, serving as a tool without finding a place in either the celestial or infernal realms.


    While it could be chilling to consider the position of a soul being pledged as collateral, I did not feel any apprehension. After all, it was Liv who had made the contract, not me.


    Among demons, human souls were highly sought after and considered valuable. There were numerous cases of other demons seizing the souls when the contracting human died, attempting to absorb them.


    To prevent such unforeseen circumstances, demons periodically drank the blood of the contractors, binding their souls. It was akin to writing your name on an item you owned.


    Kamian and I performed the soul-binding ritual every fortnight. When we were younger, I lightly wounded my fingertips, and Kamian would suck on the blood. However, it turned out that such a small amount of blood was insufficient to firmly bind the soul. Since then, Kamian started sinking his fangs directly into my neck.


    As a result, there remained an indelible scar, like a cruel mark, on the left side of my neck.

 Chapter 6 - Ritual

    "We should eat until we''re truly stuffed tonight."


    Along with the ritual, my energy would be completely drained to the point where I could not even lift a finger. Hm... In truth, if it were merely a matter of losing stamina, I would not have been so concerned about replenishing my energy to this extent. The ritual had greater side effects.


    Namely... I became sexually aroused.


    As the amount of blood I consumed increased, my sexual sensations heightened. When we were younger, giving Kamian a few drops of blood on my fingers did not result in such side effects.


    To minimize the intensified sexual sensations, I needed to have self-control firmly attached to my physical being. But on the days when my strength waned, and I would even faint, my instincts-driven body acted out without restraint. Well... only Kamian suffered during those times.


    There was a time when I slapped Kamian''s chest and cried, "Please, help me somehow." It wasn''t just some embarrassing words said while sobbing. Ha, even thinking about it now makes my ears burn. Anyway, since that day, I have paid even more attention to replenish my energy before the ritual.


    "Yeah... It was a good decision not to go to the farm."


    To be precise, it was Kamian who didn''t go. Nevertheless, I pulled up a chair instead of sitting on the bed. As the curtain got damp, the crimson sky of the evening twilight was revealed. Night would arrive in the blink of an eye.


    After spending a long time drying my hair with a dry towel, I nestled myself into the warm embrace of the blankets.


    * * *


    My face twitched incessantly. It wasn''t an unpleasant sensation, but it greatly disturbed my peaceful slumber. I furrowed my brow slightly and parted my lips. It felt as though I had said something, but I couldn''t recall it.


    At that moment, something warm enveloped my cheek, embracing it gently. The cozy sensation caused a fleeting smile to grace my lips. What had lingered near my cheeks and ears now delicately caressed my eyelids.


    "Um... tomorrow, perhaps... tomorrow."


    A pleasant, low-pitched laughter echoed in my ears.


    "Will you do it tomorrow?"


    It felt as though I had responded and nodded my head.


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    "But I''ve been patient for far too long."


    "...No."


    "No?"


    A laughter that brushed against my heartstrings echoed persistently. Even though there was nothing particularly amusing, a soft smile crept upon my face.


    Amidst this, a hand that had quietly remained in the covers was seized. With a suitable pressure, fingers were pressed coolly, rubbing the palm. This delightful massage gradually brought back my fading consciousness.


    I lifted my heavy eyelids, only to find a dark and hazy vision. My sight failed to grasp anything clearly. After blinking a few times, a blurry outline of a face came into view.


    "Kamian?"


    "I didn''t mean for you to just give up waiting."


    Kamian let go of the hand he was holding. Ah, it felt refreshing and pleasant. Regretfully, I pulled his finger lightly, and it entwined with mine once more.


    "Ah... sorry. I ate too much."


    "That''s why you felt full."


    "I rummaged through your clothes. Did you notice?"


    "I felt your touch."


    Although it was a question aimed at pushing him toward perversion, he was taking it a step further. It amazed me, and I burst into a hollow laughter.


    "Now that my stomach is satisfied, there''s nothing to worry about today."


    The blanket, which had been tightly wrapped around my neck, was pulled back. Kamian effortlessly ascended onto my body, using his knees and arms to support himself without imposing any weight.


    "Um... probably?"


    "You''re sounding unusually uncertain."


    "Well, it''s just before my menstrual cycle," I gently explained, narrowing my brow. I thought that he, being a human and a man, might not understand my body, so I added the explanation kindly.


    "Before menstruation, sexual desire tends to intensify."


    "It would be best to keep your mouth shut then."


    Even if I spoke honestly, it would cause a commotion. I swiftly pulled my hand out of Kamian''s grasp. At that moment, my fingertips twitched with an indescribable sense of emptiness. Before I could grasp the reason for that emptiness, Kamian''s lips subtly brushed against my neck. The warmth of his breath spread across my sensitive skin, sending shivers down my spine all the way to the back of my neck. Ah, perhaps it''s because of the premenstrual period; it''s definitely driving me even more insane. My period hasn''t started yet, but my toes keep curling involuntarily.


    "I''ll take care of it."


    "Mm."


    His warm hand gently swept over my tense body, as if trying to calm it down. Despite wearing two layers of clothing, I could feel the warmth of his hand fully transmitted to me.


    "Relax. Loosen up."


    "I''m not tense. It''s not like this happens every once in a while."


    "Look at how rigid you are right now."


    "Hmph."

 Chapter 7 - Sanity

    Kamian tapped my delicately arched foot with his own. No, that... It wasn''t due to nervousness. It felt awkward to speak the truth, so I let it go and allowed my mind to wander.


    "You even make lewd sounds. You''re sensitive."


    "I told you, it''s premenstrual... Ah!"


    Thud. Suddenly, his flesh pierced mine without warning. My eyes widened. The bones in my hands clutched Kamian''s shoulders forcefully.


    "Ugh!"


    The pain sharply sliced through my brain, ominously dominating my body''s senses.


    "Ugh... Ah, ah, Kamian..."


    The sensation of my blood being sucked into Kamian''s mouth felt exquisitely acute. With each drain of blood, a dark stain began to grow from beneath the surface. In the past, I would stifle my moans out of embarrassment, biting down on my lower lip. But the audacious Kamian forced his fingers into my mouth, compelling me to moan. From then on, without any trace of shame, I let out moans.


    "Cam... ian, huh, ha... How far... ah..."


    Kamian gripped both my nape and chest, expelling beastly breaths before passionately sucking my neck.


    "It''s... exhausting. Hm? Kamian..."


    He withdrew his fangs and trailed his lips along my throat. The warm, velvety flesh gently brushed against my ear, whispering seductively.


    "Just a little more, just a little."


    "Hah!"


    Despite the tender voice of appeasement, the sucking mouth was ferocious beyond measure. Suck. Slurp. The friction of saliva and blood against the skin filled the air with a constant, moist sound.


    "Now... stop... huh, ah..."


    A hazy heat threatened to melt my brain. The arms embracing Kamian convulsed without respite. The overwhelming sensations made it unbearable; my pelvis continuously bucked and my toes pushed against the sheets.


    "Hyuk! Kamian!"


    Kamian exhaled hot breath onto my neck.


    I was on the verge of losing my sanity. Today''s desire was unusually intense, rendering the farm and the meal I had earlier utterly futile. I didn''t even realize that I would utter embarrassing lines to Kamian like last time. No, my intuition loudly declared that it was highly likely to happen.


    "Kamian, please... Heuh, I can''t hold on any longer. Ah, ah... Kamian!"


    My thighs were already damp, and my pelvis eagerly yearned for something as it moved faster, up and down.


    A fever surged in the corners of my eyes. The unreleased excitement welled up so intensely that it trickled down through my throat and trickled down my uvula.


    "Oh, me, really... Heuh! The limit... My body is burning. Heuh, I feel like I''m going to die. Please..."


    The vague desire that had been brewing within me began to take on a clearer form. I longed for a strong hand to firmly grasp my entire chest, nestled underneath it, while the moistness between Kamian''s legs feverishly stimulated the depths of my senses. If only his overwhelming power could shake my body so violently that I could barely catch my breath.


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    Finally, the tenuous hold on something I had desperately clung to was abruptly severed.


    Frantically, I pushed Kamian''s clothing aside, yearning to touch his well-defined muscles and smooth skin with my own hands. As my hand slipped inside his shirt, I could feel the tension building in his abdomen.


    "Ah! Kamian, ah, I want more. I can''t hold back any longer. [Sob]."


    Kamian, who had seemed invincible, finally relinquished his hold on my neck. After roughly wiping the blood from the corner of his mouth with the back of his hand, he gently brushed away the sweat and tears that clung to my face with his dampened hair.


    "Just hold on a little longer. It''ll be okay soon."


    Anger surged within me. How could you be so indifferent after putting me in this state?


    "You crazy bastard, ugh, sigh... You''ve only had a taste of blood, ugh... Ah, Kamian, hold me."


    Although I wanted to pummelled his body, my hands kept caressing and pulling him closer against my will.


    Kamian descended from my body and lay beside me. He grabbed my arm and pulled me forcefully into his embrace.


    But such an embrace alone couldn''t satisfy my hot desire. I pressed myself against Kamian''s exposed lower body, whispering provocatively.


    "Shall we? Hmm?"


    Kamian only brushed away the tears from my shaking back without uttering a word. Silence often breeds uncertainty. Overwhelmed by sadness and frustration, tears streamed down my face.


    "You''re the one who made me like this, take responsibility. Ah... I''m itching all over. Touch me, Kamian."


    "Tomorrow, regain your composure and don''t regret. Just hold on a little longer."


    "I''m the one who will regret, ugh, what does it matter to you! Ugh..."


    Kamian pressed the back of my head against his chest, his tears seeping into his shirt. Throughout the long night, I repeatedly tempted and provoked Kamian, alternating between anger and seduction. But Kamian remained unmoved, silently holding me. Stubborn bastard. I could feel your presence down there, against my lower abdomen. In the end, it was I who surrendered. Like a fallen leaf, I succumbed to unconsciousness and woke up in the morning, screaming and tearing at my hair.


    * * *


    "Stand up."


    I felt embarrassed, ashamed, and humiliated to the point where my face was about to explode.


    Throughout breakfast, I didn''t even turn my head towards Kamian. In response to my current state, Debra cautiously asked, "Did you two have a fight?" Before I could timidly deny it, Kamian spoke first. "I did something wrong. I got really angry last night." Eventually, instead of eating, I slammed my forehead on the table.


    With a reddened forehead, I looked down at Kamian''s back.


    "Today... let''s just walk."


    "Why? Are you itching for another fight?"


    "...."


    Anger surged within me, almost bursting my eardrums. Oh, the cursed words I couldn''t say. Kamian lightly tapped his own back.


    "My leg hurts. Please, get up quickly."


    "Who said we had to keep crouching? We can just walk."


    "You also felt my penis earlier. There''s no difference between us. So stop being embarrassed and let''s just go."


    His blatant choice of words left my mouth agape. As I stood still, Kamian sighed and stood up. Then, he bent his knees to meet my eye level.


    "Get on my back before we take another step, while you''re still here to carry me."


    "...Are you a pervert?"


    "Not yet."


    Kamian sat back down, showing me his back again. Anxious that I wouldn''t be able to move a single step from here, I leaned against his back, wavering. Kamian lifted me once, and then started walking with a steady stride.


    "Hey, yesterday... um, you know? Well, I... hmm? You know?"


    "I know. It was premenstrual, and I had a lot of blood, so that happened."


    When Kamian explained it like that, it felt like a heavy stone had been lifted from my chest. Yes. What happened last night was an inevitable accident. I didn''t need to feel embarrassed about it at all.


    With my lips pressed against Kamian''s shoulder, I murmured.


    "Forget about what happened yesterday. I''ll forget too."


    Kamian didn''t respond. Was it something he didn''t want to bring up again? I also decided to keep my mouth shut because I didn''t want to drag last night''s events all the way to today. I tried to capture the scenery passing by, leaning my cheek against Kamian''s shoulder.

 Chapter 8 - Professor

    Luke Florence is a renowned and skilled knight within the empire. However, disillusioned by the exploitation of his abilities in the power struggles of nobles and aristocrats, contrary to his belief in wielding a sword for the weak, he relinquishes all his wealth and honor.


    He longed to start a new life in a place where no one knew him. Thus, he ended up here, at the western edge of the Hesperion Kingdom, in Ezbon.


    It was truly a noble gesture when he volunteered for the professor position upon hearing that the children would graduate from the academy without ever holding a sword due to the lack of swordsmanship instructors.


    In the novel, Luke immediately recognized Kamian as a demon, yet he imparted generous teachings without prejudice. Even after Kamian turned dark and massacred the people of Ezbon''s village, Luke, who cherished him as a beloved disciple, could not raise his sword against him. On the other hand, Kamian effortlessly turned thousands of humans into piles of flesh within half a day.


    I silently gazed at Kamian sitting beside me. When Kamian sensed my gaze, he turned and said, "What?" However, I had nothing particular to say and merely stroked his cheek.


    "Live kindly, my friend."


    Kamian frowned and brushed my hand away abruptly.


    At that moment, a white-haired, tidy-haired theology professor entered the classroom. The professor distributed transparent glass bottles adorned with crosses and rough-edged stones on the desks of the undergraduate students.


    "These holy water and relics have been most useful when facing demons throughout our long history. When we touch these holy water and relics, we feel nothing, just like touching ordinary water and stones by the roadside. But demons are different."


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    I glanced briefly at Kamian. He played with the relic, tossing it back and forth, with an unimpressed expression on his face. "Um, Professor, don''t demons feel the same?"


    "When demons touch the relics, white smoke spews out, their skin melts away, and they experience excruciating pain."


    I took hold of Kamian''s hand and pulled it towards me. After removing the relic he was holding, I gently stroked his palm. "Um, Professor, he seems perfectly fine. I even ran my hand over Kamian''s palm, feeling the familiar texture of his smooth and solid skin, as always.


    Kamian, with his other hand free, rested his chin on it and stared at me intently. In a soft whisper, I spoke to the quiet Kamian.


    "It seems to be a counterfeit."


    "Really?"


    At that moment, the professor showed us something resembling bat wings.


    "This is the skin of a lesser demon. Now, when you bring the relic close to it, you''ll see. Watch as the skin melts like a liquid."


    Kamian raised an eyebrow at me. I added another remark to Kamian.


    "Professor, your arrogance seems quite genuine."


    As if he had heard my whisper, the professor approached our desks.


    "Kamian, would you like to try touching the relic?"


    Kamian casually picked up the relic with a nonchalant expression and pressed it against the skin. Instantly, the skin emitted white smoke and melted away.


    "Any other undergraduate students who would like to try?"


    Hands shot up all around the room, each student eager to participate. I stared at Kamian with wide eyes.


    "What are you? What''s happening to you?"


    "It seems I''m immune."


    "Why, even though you''re a demon?"

 Chapter 9 - Book

    Kamian shrugged his shoulders, no, he pleaded for words. Just as he was about to grasp his throat, the professor came to Kamian''s rescue.


    "On rare occasions, this relic may not affect higher-ranking vampires. Their formidable magic can overpower the power of the artifact. In such cases, use holy water. During my time as a saint, I have encountered hundreds of vampires. Although I have come across vampires who are immune to the relic, I have never encountered a vampire immune to holy water."


    In other words, Kamian was immune to the relic due to his immense power as a vampire. Well, it''s no wonder Luke and all the other humans were utterly powerless against that scoundrel.


    "You don''t have to return the holy water and relics I gave you today. If any vampires appear before you from this day forward, you should be able to protect yourself, right?"


    I gazed at the holy water and relic before me, and let out a sigh. Then, I gently brushed Kamian''s cheek up and down.


    "Please live a righteous life, my dear."


    * * *


    As soon as I arrived home after all the lectures were over, I began my exercise regimen. Today''s physical training involved sit-ups. Kamian firmly wrapped my legs to prevent any movement.


    "Ugh... Ugh!"


    "Come up a little higher."


    "Ah, ugh!"


    "No, you can''t. You can''t even count to this height."


    That wicked and heartless child! I exerted all my strength, feeling like my face would burst. Finally, my upper body separated from the ground. Kamian''s malicious lips parted.


    "Four."


    "Phew!"


    Upon hearing the count, I collapsed on the floor. My body felt hot and sweaty, and my energy seemed to drain away through my fingertips. Oh, I can''t take it anymore. My chest rose and fell heavily.


    "You said you could do more than five."


    "I will. Just wait... Ah, wait a moment, ah... I have something to do... Ah, yeah..."


    Kamian rested his chin on my knee.


    "What''s on your mind?"


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    ...Wait and see. What excuse should I make to explain what I was thinking? I rummaged through my spinning head and randomly picked a topic.


    "During theology class today..."


    "Go on."


    "You didn''t even flinch when touching the relic."


    "Did that impress you?"


    "Yes. I want to see it again."


    Honestly, it was somewhat impressive. But I didn''t want to see it again that badly. However, I lied to quickly finish this hellish exercise of sit-ups. I''d rather hold a basket of potatoes for a long time. Sit-ups would make my face and stomach explode, I swear.


    I reached out my hands toward Kamian.


    "You have to get up for me to show you."


    "...Can''t you see my hands? Hold them."


    "Hold your ears."


    This wicked demon, Kamian, made me do five more sit-ups without any mercy. Because I insisted on doing one more, I successfully completed today''s workout with a total of six. Exhausted, my body bathed in sweat, and my strength drained away. Ah, I''m done for.


    After finishing my bath and returning to the bedroom, I found Kamian lying on my bed, reading a book. I sat on the edge of the bed, shaking my head vigorously.


    "Move over and let me dry my hair."


    In a low, commanding voice, he pushed me away. Finally, I was forced to retreat to a chair, and only then could I sit on the bed after drying my hair. Kamian continued to read his book without interruption.


    I snatched the book he was engrossed in reading. Seeing his scowling expression, I lay down on the adjacent spot.


    "Phew. It''s so childish."


    It was unlike Kamian to enjoy reading romance novels. Once, he stayed locked in his bedroom all day, and when I finally opened the door and went in, I found him reading a romance novel, tears streaming down his face. I teased him about it for about a year. I want to tease him again.


    "Give it to me."


    "Stay right there. Let me take a look too."


    "Do not turn the page. I have carefully marked the section... Ah."


    When I closed the book abruptly, Kamian let out a genuine sigh.


    "Why did you read my book in my room, knowing it could be taken away from me?"


    Kamian closed her mouth, covering her eyes with her forearm, appearing disheartened. Although I felt a tinge of guilt, laughter escaped my lips involuntarily.


    "Alright, I understand. From now on, I won''t touch your books ever again."


    "You said the same thing last time."


    "This time, I mean it. I truly won''t touch them."


    "..."


    "Shall I find the page for you? Do you remember which part you were reading? ''I''m ready to abandon everything. Let''s run away together.'' Is that correct?"


    I gently caressed the palm of Kamian''s hand, which was placed next to her face. The limp palm then tightened around my hand.


    "Give me the book. Go to my room and finish reading."


    "Why? Wasn''t I waiting for you?"


    "..."


    "I waited for you because I wanted to see you touching the relic. Show it to me quickly."

 Chapter 10 - Liquid

    Kamian let out a deep breath from within. Love, Kamian, it is as painful and bitter as this.


    "Bring it."


    "Yes, I''ll get it right away."


    I brought the holy water and relics, which I had kept under the wardrobe, holding one in each hand as I climbed onto the bed.


    "There, touch it."


    I placed the relic on his palm. Under Kamian''s hand, the relic was nothing more than an ordinary stone.


    "Are you satisfied?"


    Kamian was about to lower the relic onto the bed and get up. I hurriedly grabbed hold of him.


    "What about the holy water? Even if it''s you, are you still fine?"


    Kamian stared at the holy water in silence. I thought the obvious answer would come out immediately, but the silence lingered.


    "Is the holy water causing you pain?"


    "...Uh."


    Kamian dragged his words out, making them unnaturally long. I swiftly sensed something was amiss. This rascal is lying.


    As I tightly held the holy water in my hand and stared at Kamian, his thick, neatly groomed eyebrow twitched.


    "I''m telling the truth."


    I remembered a passage I read in a novel. "...Kamian, all attempts to eliminate that cruel murderer were futile in the face of his immense power. Humans who lost the will to resist could only raise their hands towards the sky." ...Does it make any sense that such a person would be affected by a common relic easily found in a temple?


    When I opened the corked bottle with a cross-shaped ornament, Kamian''s expression was subtly contorted. I met his gaze and smiled with a mischievous twinkle in my eyes.


    "But... my instincts are telling me that you''re lying."


    "You''ve never guessed right with your instincts. Get rid of it."


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    "This... can it be sprayed?"


    Without showing any sign of surprise, Kamian remained indifferent even though I shook my arms as if I were about to hit him. I set my book aside and pressed further, interrogating him.


    "What''s this? Look at you, not even scared. So you admit you lied!"


    "Don''t you know that if someone is really scared, they can freeze up without any reaction?"


    "Is your face just frozen because you''re scared, or is it always this dull?"


    "No, this is a face of genuine surprise."


    Kamian covered his face with his index finger, revealing the same stoic and conceited expression as always. How insincere must one be to tell a lie?


    Considering whether to give him a good scolding, I hesitated due to the lingering discomfort that scattered like debris. The risk would be too great if, by some rare chance, Kamian''s words turned out to be true.


    "Enough. Are you lying about playing with a novel? If you''re going to lie, at least make it an interesting one."


    Kamian extended his palm toward me, gesturing for the book. Did romance novels really provide such amusement?


    Muttering to myself that it didn''t suit him at all, I turned away. Just as I was about to reach for the book at the edge of the bed, I heard a soft sound, "plop."


    "Ah."


    A low sigh escaped Kamian''s lips. Suddenly, I felt my knees growing damp as I stepped onto the bed. Looking down, I saw an overturned bottle of clear liquid, with transparent droplets trickling out through the round hole.


    "Ugh..."


    "Kamian?"


    I hurriedly lifted the bottle, but all of its contents had spilled out. The liquid had soaked not only the sheets but also Kamian''s pant legs.


    Kamian clutched his knees in pain, unable to even touch his ankles due to the spilled liquid. His face buried in the sheets, he breathed heavily as if in agony.


    ...It wasn''t a lie?


    My heart plummeted to the tips of my toes. If I had playfully sprayed that liquid onto Kamian''s face... Just the thought alone made me feel nauseous and uneasy.


    "Are you, are you in a lot of pain?"


    How can the so-called strongest person in the world collapse from a single bottle of liquid? The pounding in my chest resonated in my ears. Perhaps the shock and astonishment were lingering because of the vivid image of Kamian in the novels ingrained in my mind. This feeling resembled fear.


    In a corner of my mind, a gruesome image of Kamian''s lifeless body dissolved by the liquid formed. As impure thoughts corroded my mind, a sudden speculation struck me.


    Could there be a difference in ''strength'' between before and after this dark transformation? I had encountered such clich¨¦s in various media. They were about hidden powers awakening due to the transformation.


    In other words, the current Kamian might be vulnerable to the liquid because he hadn''t undergone the dark transformation yet.


    My confused mind entertained every possible hypothesis.


    "Ugh..."


    But now was not the time for such thoughts. I had to take care of the injured Kamian. He was still groaning, gripping his leg tightly.

 Chapter 11 - Weaknesses

    "What should I do? Kamian, let me examine your ankle. If it hurts because I touched it wrong, shout in pain."


    Kamian seemed too overwhelmed to respond. I cautiously grabbed the hem of Kamian''s pants, feeling the dampness on my fingertips, which seemed ominous.


    "...What if you can never use your ankle again? Will I have to carry you around? Can I even do that?"


    My hand gripping the hem trembled uncontrollably. I couldn''t bring myself to lift the pants, fearing that Kamian''s ankle might be in a state like the melting skin of a demon''s relic.


    There was no time to waste. Sulphuric acid might still be corroding Kamian''s skin. I anxiously strengthened my grip on the pants, mustering all my strength in the corner of my eye. At the same time, I tried to wipe off the acid with my clothes, but...


    "You doubted me when I said it was a lie earlier."


    "..."


    "You fell for it completely."


    Contrary to my worries, Kamian''s ankle was perfectly fine. With a dejected expression, I looked up, only to find Kamian wearing a smug smile. Suddenly, a surge of anger welled up within me. In a fit of rage, I fiercely struck the exposed instep with my clenched fist. Kamian let out a grunt, but I felt no remorse whatsoever.


    That rascal had turned my head and mind upside down with his anxiety-inducing actions. I glared at him, teeth gritted, but Kamian''s smile gradually faded from his face. He lifted himself up and trapped my waist between his legs.


    "Surprised?"


    He asked in a gentle tone, brushing my hair behind my ear. My heart was still pounding fiercely. When I first met Kamian in the novel, he seemed like a villain who wouldn''t be satisfying even if I beat him to death. However, after being sucked into this world and living side by side with him for fifteen years, it seemed I had grown fond of him. The thought of him being able to die made my throat tighten, and my head became dizzy.


    "You''re about to cry."


    His warm, large hand enveloped my cheek, gently stroking under my eyes.


    I pushed his hand away and stormed out of the bedroom. The sound of footsteps pounding on the floor revealed how low my spirits were. It was infuriating how my emotions were running wild, as if I were in my adolescence.


    It was good that I forcefully pushed Kamian away and left the bedroom, but there was nowhere suitable to go. It was too cold outside, and the sun was setting. Going to Debra and Jex''s bedroom on the first floor was out of the question. I didn''t want to cause unnecessary trouble by simply opening the door and going in, as they would surely notice that I had fought with Kamian.


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    In the end, ironically, the place I headed to avoid seeing Kamian was Kamian''s bedroom. I opened the door wide and threw myself onto his bed, flipping the blanket over my head.


    It didn''t take long before I heard the sound of the door opening, and slow footsteps approached. As one side of the bed tilted, I pressed myself against the wall.


    "Planning to sleep here after switching rooms today?"


    "..."


    "Sleeping together might be difficult. The bed is narrow."


    "Leave."


    "It''s cold. Let''s warm up under the blanket together."


    Kamian lay down next to me and slipped into the covers. Just like me, he had flipped the blanket over his head and quietly called my name.


    "Liv."


    "..."


    "Should I tell you my weaknesses?"


    Taken aback by his unexpected words, I turned my face towards Kamian.


    "Do you really think there is such a thing as a weakness for that scoundrel? Or is this another one of his teasing games?" I stood there, unable to provide a prompt response, my eyes widened in bewilderment. In stark contrast to my confusion, Kamian''s smile grew deeper, emanating an air of sophistication. Seeing his smug face, I momentarily forgot the fact that I had been angry just moments ago and silently marvelled within.


    Kamian shifted his body, inching closer towards my face. The distance between us was so close that our noses almost brushed, and I could feel the warmth of each other''s breath. And then, he whispered discreetly.


    "My weakness lies in your blood."


    Even though I clearly understood his words, I doubted my own ears.


    "My blood?"


    Kamian nodded, his smile still intact.


    "It can subdue me more effectively than any charm or relic."


    "How can my blood do that?"


    Kamian chuckled softly, grazing my nose with his lips.


    "Ah."


    The sudden and natural turn of events left me dumbfounded, and all I could do was gaze at Kamian, bewildered and lost, without even realizing what had happened.


    "I shouldn''t have mentioned that."


    "Why not? Don''t be so coy. Since you''ve brought it up, spill it all."


    "You''re already giving me a hard time. If I reveal everything, you''ll have even more power over me."


    "What''s the harm in that? Can''t you handle a little shake-up?"


    Kamian simply laughed in response, refusing to provide an answer. I found solace in the sight of his face from beneath the covers, feeling somewhat relieved. If my blood truly was Kamian''s only weakness, then it meant that no one could harm him without my cooperation.


    I fervently hoped for my own recovery and for Kamian to no longer love me... Praying that the day would never come when I would have to use my blood to lead Kamian to his own destruction.


    * * *


    Recently, Kamian had been leading busy days without a moment''s respite. The scorching energy of the sun had subsided, and as autumn arrived, they transitioned into the full-fledged harvest season.


    Kamian not only worked on our farm but also helped out with the neighbouring farms that required the labour of young people. While they received a meagre compensation in the form of harvested crops or a small wage, it was far from commensurate with the effort Kamian put in.

 Chapter 12 - Harvest

    The neighbours didn''t undercut Kamian''s labour. They showed their utmost gratitude as people who barely managed to survive for a year on the diligently cultivated crops.


    Nevertheless, every harvest season meant sleepless nights and exhausting exertion, which Kamian disliked. Yet, without a single complaint, they silently carried out their work. It was only natural for them to win the overflowing affection of the villagers.


    "Doesn''t Kamian find it challenging?"


    Kamian was effortlessly moving a bundle of harvested peanuts without showing any signs of strain. Despite being occupied in the beekeeping yard all day yesterday and returning only at dawn... I marvelled at their monstrous stamina.


    "Leave, take a break if it''s too difficult."


    "No? I''m fine."


    Debra asked with a concerned tone. I resumed picking peanuts after pausing for a moment. Everyone is working, so I can''t just sit idly. Picking peanuts doesn''t require much physical exertion since it involves sitting still and moving only my hands and eyes.


    "We''re so fortunate to have Kamian. Thanks to them, our farming operation has expanded, and our family doesn''t starve."


    Debra took away more than half of the peanuts stacked in front of me.


    "Kamian should be grateful. They suddenly appeared and settled in our home."


    Debra and Jex regarded Kamian as a sort of abandoned orphan. Despite their less-than-ample means, they tenderly cared for Kamian, who had no ties to them other than their compassionate hearts.


    Furthermore, if we were to delve deeper, even ''Liv'' was a stranger to Debra and Jex. Liv, who was the neighbour of Jex, had lost both parents to illness, and Debra and Jex embraced Liv, who inherited that frail vitality.


    "When I saw you two holding hands tightly as you descended the stairs, I thought that God had sent me to this land to look after you."


    I chuckled and casually tossed the crushed peanuts to the ground.


    "Why make such a fuss?"


    "You may not understand, but at that time, it was truly so."


    While Debra seems to preserve her first encounter with Kamian as a rather romantic memory, my perspective differed. Having been sucked into the novel''s vortex, everything was frightening and bewildering. Holding hands with Kamian was only because she forcefully pulled me out of my panic.


    Back then, I couldn''t have imagined becoming so close to Kamian, nor could I have known that Debra and Jacks would truly become like family to me. Such transformations astound me anew, reaffirming that humans are indeed creatures capable of adaptation... These thoughts prompted a nod from me.


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    "Now that they''re all grown, how does it feel? I feel like I''ve grown them perfectly, but Kamian''s growth is too much, isn''t it strange?"


    "Grow them all, huh? I won''t be at ease until I see you two get married."


    "Don''t say such things. It''s about me and Kamian? Please, we''ve grown up together since we were young... like siblings... Ah, sorry."


    A thorn from the cluster of peanuts pierced my index finger. A red droplet formed like a dot and trickled downward.


    "Are you hurt? Let me see."


    "It''s just a small prick."


    "Oh, dear, you''re bleeding."


    I stared at the droplet of blood slowly flowing along my hand. Suddenly, I lifted my head and searched for Kamian.


    Kamian, covered in dirt and sweat, was accepting the water jug extended by Jacks. With one hand on his waist, he drank the water with refined grace, like a well-sculpted artifact. His bulging neck muscles moved sensuously, and the shirt drenched in sweat revealed every contour of his impressive physique.


    From him, I felt a vitality that I lacked. I marvelled at his taut body that seemed impenetrable even by a single needle, and in doing so, my gaze caught a glimpse of my own blood.


    Is that the extent of his vulnerability¡ªmy blood?


    But then again, doesn''t he drink my blood every fortnight? Ah, come to think of it, the ritual always takes place at night. Relying solely on the dim moonlight seeping through the darkness, I offer my blood, willingly and eagerly.


    "...Is it my blood that frightens you?"


    The thought was so compelling that I couldn''t help but rise from my seat.


    "Debra, I shall briefly go to Kamian. I have something to say."


    "Very well. While you''re at it, wash your hands too. We mustn''t let germs enter our wounds."


    "Understood."


    I stood before Kamian without wiping away the flowing blood. Kamian tilted their head and calmly observed me.


    "Yes?"


    They handed me the water container they had just used to drink. I shook my head in response. Kamian drained the remaining water and placed the container in a corner.


    "Kamian."


    I raised my hand, the bleeding index finger hovering before their eyes. What do you think, does it frighten you? But contrary to my expectations, Kamian showed no discernible emotion on their face, merely staring silently at my hand.


    They blinked their eyes, which had fluttered for a moment, and then abruptly enclosed my hand within theirs. Lowering their gaze halfway, they brought their lips closer. I caught a glimpse of their reddened tongue peeking through their slightly parted lips.


    "Hey, what are you...!"


    I hastily blocked their forehead with my hand. Kamian moved only their eyes and met my gaze.


    "You weren''t asking for me to suck it, were you?"


    "Why would I want you to do that, you lunatic."


    If they were to suck my blood here, it would arouse me sexually. Only a madman would do such a thing in broad daylight with Debra and Jex watching us! It would be unthinkable to let my blood be sucked.

 Chapter 13 - Disappointed

    Of course, the mere sight of blood on my finger did not excite me greatly. However, due to the two years of intense sensitivity caused by Kamian driving his fangs into my neck, the act of drawing blood itself had acquired a peculiar fascination. It felt like something out of Pavlov''s dogs.


    As I stared at him in bewilderment, Kamian shrugged dismissively, brushing his face against mine. Even when I narrowed my eyes and glared at him, he remained unfazed and replied nonchalantly, "What?" He grasped my wrist and, without hesitation, directed his gaze to the back of the person walking ahead of us.


    "You said my blood was a weakness. Was that a lie?"


    "It is a weakness, indeed."


    "Then why are you so nonchalant about it?"


    "Because you''re using it incorrectly."


    "Well, how should I use it then? Tell me."


    "Who should I tell you to use it for?"


    "For me, tell me! For me!"


    Kamian pumped the handle and drew water from the well, taking hold of my hand and bringing it towards the flowing liquid. A chilling sensation spread from my fingertips to my head. As I trembled slightly, Kamian quickly withdrew his hand and let out a mischievous chuckle. His warm breath gently caressed my skin, tickling it.


    "Even if you ask, I won''t tell you. So, don''t waste your strength on futile matters."


    "How can my weakness be... futile?"


    "Because."


    Having examined my fingers from all angles, Kamian seemed to have finished his inspection and turned his back to me. Then, he rudely pushed me away with his hand. I felt like a child being dismissed after causing an accident. "Hey, wait a minute," I called, but Kamian had already distanced himself.


    "Arrogant bastard. He really won''t tell me."


    Muttering to myself, I returned to Debra. I threw the crushed peanut, unusable to the point of despair, behind me, thinking of it as Kamian.


    Harvesting, by its very nature, is not something that can be completed in a single day. By the time our eyes and backs had become unbearably sore, Debra declared that we should stop for the day. I followed suit, sweeping the sorted peanuts into the basket.


    As expected, Kamian had been summoned to the neighbouring farm to be freed from the peanut field. Thanks to that, I had to exercise alone today.


    I pondered whether I should go jogging when Drag the old man happened to come by, inviting people from the village to share the harvested tomatoes. Just carrying them back home would be enough exercise.


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    * * *


    Can I do it? No, I can. Believe in myself. After lightly patting my trembling heart with my hand, I took a deep breath.


    I stared fiercely at the basket containing ten tomatoes and then lifted it up with great determination.


    "Ugh!"


    My shaky arms trembled, and heat rose from my throat to my face. I felt my muscles tense, but I didn''t give up. I vigorously lifted the basket, and when I embraced it with both arms, I found a more stable posture than when I had lifted it with just my fingers.


    "See? I told you I could do it."


    I, overcome with my own strength, was surrounded by chirping laughter that sounded like sparrows.


    It was the young ones from the village, Sherry and Tom. They were happily running around like puppies, even while carrying baskets piled with tomatoes.


    "..."


    For a moment, I felt a slight... sense of humiliation, but I pretended not to care. Losing one''s self-esteem is a defeat.


    "Liv!"


    Sherry, who was running around, shaking her double-braided hair, approached and stood in front of me. She was breathing heavily, and her breath was a little faster.


    "Did you come to do an errand?"


    "Oh! But why are you alone, Liv? Where''s the prince?"


    The owner of this sickeningly sweet title was none other than Kamian.


    "He went to work during the harvest season."


    Sherry''s face noticeably darkened. Her disappointed lips pouted.


    "...I came here expecting to see the prince."


    "Hey! Why would Kamian be your prince?"


    Tom grabbed Sherry''s head and shook it, taunting her loudly.


    "Don''t touch my head! And what''s it to you?!"


    When Sherry retorted sharply, Tom flinched for a moment and let go of her head. But Tom, with a firm voice, dug deeper into Sherry''s feelings.


    "Kamian said he''s going to marry Liv, you know? Our mother said the same thing! Even Mr. Dreg said so!"


    "Why would the prince marry someone as weak as Liv?! I can carry more than ten tomatoes, even more than Liv! Right, Liv?!"


    Sherry''s raised eyebrows were directed at me. I couldn''t decide whether to affirm or deny it. It''s true that I won''t marry Kamian, but...


    "...I''m not that weak, you know..."


    My pride was hurt for no reason. I''ve been exercising every day without fail, and while it''s still minimal, my strength has definitely improved.


    Sherry and Tom continued their argument, ignoring my words and escalating their dispute. Tom raised both hands to his waist and spoke with a mocking tone.


    "You''re just a crybaby. Kamian doesn''t like kids like that."


    "Liv is the same, though."


    "I''m not a crybaby..."


    Sherry tugged at my clothes, causing my upper body to sway and my center of gravity to wobble.


    I planted my toes firmly on the ground and resisted. Thankfully, I managed to avoid a catastrophic incident of dropping the basket onto the floor. After placing the basket on the ground, I bowed my head towards Sherry.

 Chapter 14 - Fight

    "Liv always follows Kamian''s lead! Isn''t that right, Liv?!"


    "But it''s because she''s influenced by him..."


    However, as expected, my words held no importance to either of them.


    "Kamian probably doesn''t like ordinary brown-haired girls, does he?!"


    "Liv''s brown-haired too! Even darker and uglier than me!"


    My self-esteem was diminishing by the second. The children''s conversation showed no signs of ending, and at this rate, it seemed like the sun would set before I reached home. I let out a deep sigh inwardly and intervened between the bickering kids, who were barking and howling at each other.


    "Hey, kids, don''t fight because of Kamian. When you reach my age, Kamian will be an old fart..."


    "Mind your own business, Liv!"


    You may not care, but I''m a human too, and I feel hurt. With a firm tone, I suppressed my bitter taste and lifted the tomato basket. The kids, without saying a word of farewell to me, continued their meaningless squabble, fueled by their own enthusiasm.


    Struggling with each step, I moved my legs and made my way home. By the time I reached the point of exhaustion, a bustling sound emerged from behind. In no time, the bickering kids, having concluded their argument, passed in front of me, snickering. I stood still for a moment, gazing at their receding figures like a fleeting arrow.


    "...I left ten minutes earlier."


    That cursed rascal. I couldn''t help but let out a hollow laugh before resuming my slow and deliberate pace.


    * * *


    Upon arriving home, I was drenched in perspiration. Jex, who had been preparing dinner, hastily dropped the ladle he was holding and urgently caught the tomato. "Ten? Why did you go to such lengths?" Jex inquired, but I had no strength left to respond. I collapsed onto the couch and took a sip of water. It was only when my gasping breaths began to calm down that I could finally open my mouth.


    "It feels like I''ve completed a week''s worth of exercise."


    "Wash up and lie down. I''ll call you when dinner is ready."


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    Even though I should have replied, "It''s okay," at least to show some courtesy, I was too exhausted to utter a single word.


    "Thank you. Oh, is there a pile of laundry? Just leave it. I''ll take care of it tomorrow."


    "Debra said she would do it after dinner, so you don''t have to worry."


    Jex gently patted my sweaty back. Such tenderness made me feel smaller. I couldn''t help but smile awkwardly, unable to hide my remorse.


    After completing my bath and emerging, I was consumed by a sense of exhaustion that made me feel like I could fall asleep the moment my head touched the pillow. I rubbed my tired eyes and emerged with my damp clothes in hand. It felt like a disgrace that Debra had to come all the way to my room because I couldn''t even handle household chores.


    As I descended the stairs to the first floor, I suddenly caught sight of Kamian''s room. It seemed that the scoundrel hadn''t done his laundry either.


    "Since we''re going, why not bring it along?"


    As soon as I opened the door, a neatly made bed came into view. An impulse to jump onto that bed immediately surged within me. Control yourself. First, I need to bring the laundry. I stacked his pyjamas, which were hanging on the back of a chair, on top of my clothes.


    "I suppose it''s ready for washing, right?"


    I buried my nose in the clothes and sniffed.Kamian''s distinct scent lingered faintly. It was a strangely pleasant smell, even without any cologne. It resembled a refreshing and cool fragrance reminiscent of summer, which tantalized the senses. Is this person trying to captivate others not only with their appearance but also with their scent? I couldn''t help but remain transfixed by the clothes, as if I were addicted to it.


    "What are you doing here?"


    A resonant, low-pitched voice startled me. Kamian was leaning casually against the open door. I turned to face him, maintaining the position with my nose buried in the clothes.


    ...Damn, how embarrassing.


    I shall strive to act as naturally as possible. I nonchalantly removed my face from the clothes.


    "Why didn''t you even knock before coming in?"


    "This is my room."


    Silence followed.


    I foolishly stuttered, unable to come up with a fitting response. Acting naturally was a load of nonsense... Clearly, I resembled a caught thief in everyone''s eyes.


    Kamian, who had been silently staring at me, swiftly moved her feet. Unconsciously, I took a step back, but I couldn''t retreat much before she grabbed my wrist.


    "I wondered where you went, turns out you were engaged in perverse activities in my room."


    "Perverse..."


    I was shocked by her blatant words. Perverse activities? Isn''t that a bit too harsh? Even objectively speaking, it''s simply someone sneaking into my room while I''m away and sniffing my clothes... Now that I think about it, it does feel awfully dirty.


    I tightly sealed my lips and swallowed my dry saliva. Kamian unbuttoned two buttons on her shirt and slipped two fingers inside.


    "Come here. When I asked you to smell it, smell it."

 Chapter 15 - Sleep Deprived

    As I turned my head away, avoiding the approaching Kamian, I opened my coat.


    "...I just wanted to see if it was time for you to do the laundry, that''s all."


    "Despite that, you seemed quite enthusiastically buried in your own face."


    "...Can''t you just let it go?"


    Kamian smirked and snatched the laundry from my arms.


    "Instead, don''t sleep today."


    It took a full revolution in my mind to grasp the meaning of his words. Already half a month had passed. The days were passing by faster than ever. The hectic workload during the harvest season had also contributed to my dulled sense of time.


    "I won''t sleep. Are you going out again? Weren''t we supposed to have dinner?"


    "I''m going to have dinner at Mrs. Rosalyn''s place. The work isn''t finished yet."


    "If that''s the case, why did you bother coming home?"


    Kamian gently brushed his fingertips against my cheek.


    "Even if it''s just for a minute, it''s more comfortable to rest at home."


    And with that, Kamian, seemingly in a rush, came home briefly and immediately left without even sitting down.


    I sat on his bed, gazing at the open door.


    "I didn''t realize you came because you missed me. You sly fox."


    * * *


    Until the evening, I had slept without waking up even once. Despite having a full stomach, drowsiness overwhelmed me, and I replenished my sleep with a shallow nap for about 30 minutes.


    In my heart, I wished to continue sleeping straight through until morning, but due to the words Kamian had said during the day, I forcibly lifted my heavy head.


    "I told you not to fall asleep first..."


    Even though I knew it, I let out a yawn and felt dazed.


    If I had known today was the fifteenth day, I wouldn''t have set out to get tomatoes. My weary body was not recovering easily. If things continued like this, I might lose my self-control and succumb to Kamian''s advances.


    "It''s highly likely to happen."


    I had to come up with a plan. I wiped my gaunt face with both hands and forced myself up from the heavy body. Slowly scanning the room, which I knew well enough to visualize even with my eyes closed, my gaze suddenly stopped. I opened the last drawer of the desk, which I rarely opened.


    Various odds and ends were piled up in disorder. I bent my knees and sat, leaning my head into the drawer. I rummaged through scissors, writing paper, and hairpins I used when I was young. Then, this summer, I pulled out the remaining fabric that I had used to make curtains.


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    "This should work."


    I covered my mouth with the fabric and tightly tied a knot behind my head. If I sealed my mouth shut, I could prevent myself from saying foolish things like wanting to do it with Kamian or not being able to resist.


    With determination, I waited for Kamian to arrive.


    Warmth caressed around my eyes and swept away from my cheeks. Unconsciously, my mind, which had been submerged, slowly returned, and my eyelids opened. In the darkness, I could vaguely see the contours of a face.


    "Did I sleep?"


    "Your nose was snoring."


    Kamian, who had taken up the space next to my bed without me noticing, lightly nudged the corner of my mouth.


    "I even drooled."


    "I was trying not to sleep..."


    "What''s this? Why are you doing something dangerous like this?"


    The fabric that I had tied over my mouth was dangling from my neck.


    "I wanted to seal my mouth today."


    "Why?"


    His voice sank deeper than darkness. As much as the scoundrel knew about me, I, too, readily discerned the changes in Kamian. It was evident that my words did not sit well with him.


    "Perhaps I will spout nonsense again."


    "......"


    "If you don''t want to witness me dying of embarrassment, please refrain from such statements."


    I drew the fabric up to my throat and firmly fastened it. I looked at the ceiling, laying down to signify readiness, and tapped the bed as if to signal. Kamian emitted a sound that could have been laughter or a sigh, then climbed on top of me.


    A gentle warmth subtly pressed against my body. In the darkness, we communicated through our eyes alone, replacing words with glances.


    Kamian, without averting his gaze from mine, tidied my disheveled locks that scattered haphazardly on the pillow. I could sense the fabric of his clothes sliding down below my shoulders under his touch. The cool air sensitized my skin. My body tensed momentarily. Warm breath, contrasting against the cold, brushed against my neck. And then, soft lips sucked gently, and a moist tongue slowly traced my skin. A strange shiver ran through my entire being.


    "Ugh..."


    An involuntary sound escaped even though the blood had not yet rushed. Embarrassment overwhelmed me, and my cheeks blazed with heat. Did Kamian hear it? It wasn''t a loud noise... he couldn''t have heard... please, let him not have heard...


    "Ughh!!"


    Suddenly, he set his teeth, as if trying to rid my mind of intrusive thoughts. Something sharp and pointed pierced through the flesh. A scorching pang spread from my throat. I clung tightly to Kamian''s back, trembling uncontrollably. With each time Kamian moved his mouth to draw in blood, the pain gradually faded away, and my body relaxed languidly. Then, a surge of sensuality filled me, as if hot water was spreading throughout my body.


    "Uhh... mmm, mmm!"


    The sensuality that had tingled from the tips of my toes surged through my veins and coursed through my entire being. My head melted dizzily, and there was an itchiness between my legs. Thump, thump, thump, thump. My heart began to race wildly. Breathing accelerated, and unwittingly, my body twitched. Haah, haah... I exerted force in my body, pulling Kamian close, then pushed his thick arm away while shaking my head.


    I felt like I was going insane. If I didn''t engage in that act immediately, I felt like I might suffocate and die. My head and instincts were fixated on one desire, like a wild horse.


    It felt like thousands of blossoms were blooming inside me. I had no idea that lying still, unable to do anything, could be so agonizing. I desperately wanted to climb up on Kamian, greedily taste his lips, and feel the splendid ecstasy with my bare flesh. However, my rigid body stood like a rock, blocking my own desires. I thrashed about like a fish thrown onto the ground.


    "Huep, ep!"


    She nestled his thigh between her legs and pressed her lower body against him. Kamian grazed her inner thighs subtly, producing a soft scratching sound. Yet desire did not abate in the slightest; instead, it etched itself more vividly. This overwhelming sensation, pulsating to the point of making her stomach churn, felt not only burdensome but also eerily peculiar.


    "Kamian, I feel feverish."


    Muffled moans reverberated as her words got muffled by the cloth covering her mouth.


    "Um, uh, mm!"

 Chapter 16 - Desire

    As Kamian sucked harder, the intensity of her desire grew. Their legs writhed on the bed,


    and he pulled her closer with his strong waist. She yearned for something explicit to penetrate the dampened depth within. She longed for a relentless surge of pleasure to sweep her away, heedless of everything else.


    Tears of arousal streamed down her face as she scratched his arms and back. At that moment, a low vibration resonated from his throat. Kamian detached his face from her neck and gazed down at her, his red irises radiating a hunger for gratification even in the darkness.


    Both of them... both desired each other''s bodies. Not just her, but Kamian as well. She reached out and embraced his neck, a thin cloth separating their lips as she kissed him fervently. Her head angled and shifted, feeling the heat of his flesh. Meanwhile, Kamian remained rigid like a stone.


    "Um, um...."


    She wriggled her lower body against Kamian''s erectness, unable to keep her hands still as they ventured into his hair.


    The thin cloth grew warm with every breath she exhaled. Tears streamed down her cheeks along her throat. Embracing the rock-hard Kamian, she was a spectacle of her own arousal and frenzy. Her position was so shameful it made her wish for her demise, yet it failed to halt her thoughts.


    At this moment... if only she could find solace in this overflowing ecstasy, she was capable of committing any act.


    "Um, uh!"


    Insufficient. She needed his body, Kamian. Even if it meant breaking herself apart in the throes of pleasure, she implored Kamian to do something to her. Rationality, completely engulfed by desire, discarded any notion of her surroundings, her identity, or the nature of the relationship between her and Kamian.


    She withdrew her hand from his tousled hair, gripping his cheeks instead. Their foreheads collided as she stared into his crimson eyes.


    "I want you. Yield to desire," she pleaded, suppressing the urge to writhe against Kamian. His deeply submerged red eyes flickered momentarily. And then, his lips, which had been so taut, touched hers. Slowly, gently. His small response alone immersed her in immense ecstasy and joy.


    "Um...."


    Without averting his gaze from her, Kamian moved his lips as if devouring, tormenting the thin, hot, and moist flesh. The contact grew increasingly intimate. He pressed his lips onto the cloth, exhaling hot breath. His teeth grazed the fabric, then his tongue emerged, sweeping across his entire lips.


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    "Uh!"


    Without warning, Kamian thrust his hips forward with great force. As the thick and rigid member pierced below, a long-awaited ecstasy spread. More. Harder. Clutching his protruding shoulder blades, I pressed my lower body closer.


    Thud, thump! Kamian''s violent movements echoed through the room. The blunt end of his phallus pressed firmly at the entrance, teasing the nucleus before withdrawing.


    "Uhmm, ugh! Ugh!"


    "Ah...."


    Kamian moved his hips frantically, as if he had lost his senses. Even the rough upward thrusts brought a tingling sensation. The enraged phallus was eager to penetrate me, piercing through my clothes and claiming me.


    "Huh... Hm!"


    With heightened arousal, Kamian couldn''t keep his hands still, skillfully caressing my pelvis and waistline. The kiss grew more intense, as if devouring my lips entirely. Overwhelmed by the trembling waves of pleasure, I could not contain my body''s restless shivers.


    The relentless movements of his hips intensified to the point where I couldn''t keep up. Kamian, with short and menacing breaths, gripped my waist and slid his hand downward, firmly grasping my innermost region.


    My hips widened as the sound of grinding bones filled the air. Kamian pressed his long and thick phallus against me, twisting his waist to ensure I fully experienced its shape.


    "Ah...."


    But it wasn''t enough. I longed for the sensation of flesh against flesh, not just through the fabric. Frustrated, I grabbed Kamian''s clothes, attempting to tear them apart, but to no avail. Annoyed, I let out exasperated breaths of various shades. It''s this damn fabric. If I ask Kamian to take it off, he would, but he''s being stubborn for no reason.


    Seizing the moment when Kamian momentarily released his lips, I reached into the fabric with my hand and pulled downward.


    "Ah...!"


    Kamian, who was lowering his head again, paused for a moment. Only the tip of his lips barely grazed mine.


    In a sultry voice, I questioned.


    "Why aren''t you doing it?"


    "..."


    "Kamian, hm?"


    In his desire-fueled crimson eyes, I glimpsed confusion, conflict, self-blame, and various emotions passing fleetingly. He flicked his long eyelashes, closing and opening his eyes. The cloudy gleam that had dimmed a little seemed to regain its clarity.


    If things continued like this, Kamian would once again leave me in a state of burning desire. Feeling anxious, I wrapped my arm around his neck. But Kamian was quicker to rise.


    He gently spread my folded leg, tucking me under the blanket. As I tried to sit up, his large hand pressed against my shoulder to stop me. Then, he lay down next to me, pulling the blanket over us both.


    "Don''t feel embarrassed later when you come to your senses. This time, it was my inability to resist."


    "Uh... No, I''m not embarrassed at all. Let''s continue. Hm?"

 Chapter 17 - Apology

    Kamian''s supportive arm embraced me despite my fervent plea.


    "Whether you curse and insult those bastards or give them a good thrashing, it doesn¡¯t matter. Just don''t stop me."


    "That''s not necessary... Hmph. Kamian... I''m wet below..."


    He pressed his lips against my head, and a whispering voice reached my ears.


    "I''m sorry."


    I couldn''t fathom the reason behind his sudden apology. Was it because he couldn''t fulfill my desires or because he had brought me to this state? Even so, Kamian had no need to apologize. We had made a contract, and this was the price to pay. Though I felt unfairly cornered by "Liv" being thrust upon me in a single contract... Regardless, Kamian wouldn''t know this truth, so there was no reason for him to apologize.


    The unfulfilled sexual desire tormented and agitated me, causing tears to stream down my face. I sobbed and caused a commotion for a while before eventually succumbing to exhaustion. It was easy and swift for my exhausted body to surrender to slumber.


    Upon awakening, the unquenchable sexual desire that had filled my mind completely vanished without a trace.


    It was the same even now.


    In a flash, as soon as I opened my eyes, yesterday''s misdeeds surged forth like a nightmare, tormenting me. Again. Again!


    "Ugh..."


    I kicked the blanket with all my strength and turned to the side, burying myself.


    "...?!"


    I almost screamed out of sheer fright. Kamian, who used to disappear by morning, was today, of all days, lingering in my room.


    After swallowing my saliva, I sat on the edge of the bed and lightly tapped his triangular back.


    "Kamian, uh..."


    I called him, but I didn''t know what to say. The memories of yesterday came rushing back, making it difficult to hide my embarrassment.


    Kamian turned his body to face me. His face appeared as impassive as ever.


    "Yesterday... heh."


    As he spoke, Kamian grabbed my cheek with one hand. Then, he swiftly moved his face from side to side, inspecting my eyes intently as if examining them with his fingers spread wide open.


    "What are you doing?"


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    "Just woke up early on my day off. Don''t see any signs of illness, though."


    "Let go."


    I flicked away his finger with a light thud. Thanks to Kamian''s prank, the tension that had gripped me eased slightly. As I tried to get up, his hands slipped into my armpits and effortlessly lifted me up.


    "Why are you still here?"


    "May I remind you that you have the audacity to enter my room as you please, while I am not allowed to be present here?"


    "...No, that''s not it. We...have never spent a single moment together in my room until now."


    A cool smirk played on Kamian''s lips, as if she had heard something amusing.


    "That? If anyone hears that, they''ll surely misunderstand."


    "Misunderstand? What mis..."


    I blinked once. The meaning of Kamian''s words dawned on me belatedly, and a fiery sensation surged through my cheeks. The unfamiliar warmth that had grazed my senses and lips came rushing back, driving me to madness.


    Kamian nudged my thigh and brought her face closer. The faint fragrance I had caught a whiff of yesterday wafted into my nostrils. Feeling a strange shift in my mood, I held my breath for a moment.


    "Why did you stop talking?"


    Why would I have stopped talking? Kamian deliberately asked me with a mischievous glint, as if she found my confusion amusing. That wretched woman. Can''t she just let it go?


    I didn''t want to indulge in her teasing. Suppressing the heat that blazed in my throat, I put on a nonchalant facade and modulated my voice.


    "I didn''t just stop talking, it was simply an exclamation to conclude the conversation."


    Kamian tilted her head slightly, her gaze fixed firmly on my face without any response. This silence only irritated me further. She should have just kept her mouth shut.


    I let out a deep sigh and gently nudged her shoulder.


    "Please, step back a little. It''s making me uncomfortable."


    "But what we did wasn''t exactly virtuous, you know."


    "...What?"


    "Even if we were misunderstood, I wouldn''t feel unjust."


    "This rascal. I intentionally avoided mentioning yesterday''s events. Not only did I fear that it would make the atmosphere awkward, but I also worried that it would complicate matters between me and Kamian. I mean, friends don''t engage in frivolous discussions about their private parts. Ugh, it''s driving me insane.


    At that moment, a gentle warmth grasped my hand momentarily before letting go. Kamian, who had suddenly acquired a radiant smile, cast her gaze downward, creating shadows with her long eyelashes.


    Instantly, my lips tingled. The impulse to scratch them with my hand flickered.


    "I put a dagger in the drawer..."


    "Hmm?"


    "Keep it next to your pillow every fortnight from now on."


    "......"


    "So that you can stab me whenever I rush at you again."


    Despite the whispering tone that sounded pleasing to the ears, the content was ruthlessly harsh.


    "Even if you couldn''t pierce me due to your sensibilities, feel free to stab me as much as you want once your anger subsides the next day."


    Did she stay in this room all night just to say these words to me? The broad and sturdy back I saw earlier now felt entirely different. What were the emotions that pressed against Kamian''s body during the silent night?


    "Why would I stab you? I''m not angry, nor am I upset. I''m just bewildered. Because friends... don''t engage in such acts."

 Chapter 18 - Resolved

    I intentionally emphasized the part about being friends. To subtly convey, ''Mixing our bodies isn''t a bad thing. However, I don''t perceive you in a romantic manner.'' Ah, upon reflection, it sounds like discarded rubbish.


    "Okay."


    Kamian smirked and lightly tapped my nose before getting up.


    "Come down and have breakfast together."


    "Sure."


    [Thunk]. As I stared at the closed door, an indescribable and frustrating sensation overwhelmed me, causing me to flop down onto the bed. I failed my arms and legs in the air and vigorously patted the blanket.


    "What''s with this unnecessary attempt to be cool? It''s seriously annoying."


    Perhaps any action I take is glorified multiple times because of that guy''s appearance. I pressed my palm firmly against my flushed cheek, then, thinking that I shouldn''t skip breakfast, I reluctantly got up from the bed, still feeling discontented."


    * * *


    Despite today not being a day to attend the academy, Kamian remained as busy as ever. Not only did he tend to our farm, but he also assisted numerous people in need. It was remarkable how he tirelessly moved from place to place, dutifully fulfilling his role as a hardworking labourer.


    "It seems like you didn''t help to this extent."


    I had never read in any novel that Kamian was kind to his neighbours. I had thought he was only devoted to Liv. But as it turned out, he was someone who treated everyone well.


    "Could it be that I''ve been brainwashed by him?"


    Since the moment I resolved to prevent Kamian''s corruption, I had always spoken the same words to him. "Live virtuously," "Love your neighbour," "Learn to endure even when faced with anger." There were too many to recall them all. The words might have changed, but the essence remained similar.


    My eyes followed Kamian''s movements, and before I realized it, my gaze unintentionally fell between his legs.


    ...It was enormous.


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    The sensation of the weapon that once rested there sent shivers down my spine.


    "Where are you looking?"


    Kamian''s handsome face suddenly appeared in my field of vision. Startled by my impure thoughts, I involuntarily jerked back. Even in Kamian''s eyes, I must have looked suspicious, as one of his eyebrows twitched.


    "Oh... I didn''t see anything. I was just lost in thought."


    ...Thinking about what was hanging between your legs.


    "You have such a perverted look on your face, so I threw it to see if you''d react. You saw mine, didn''t you?"


    "...."


    "What lewd thoughts were you imagining? Tell me, I want to hear it too."


    "It''s not what you think."


    "If that''s the case, then why is your ear turning red?"


    In any case, there was no way to let this guy off easily. I covered both ears with my palms, and Kamian responded with a mischievous smile on his face.


    "Don''t indulge in dirty fantasies. It''ll burn your bones."


    ...Damn it, this guy is insane.


    Leaving behind an infuriated me, Kamian merrily distanced himself. I hastily grabbed my coat and followed closely behind him.


    The guy who had been leading the way suddenly turned around without warning. I nearly bumped my forehead into his chest.


    "Where are you going?"


    "Well, do I have to tell you everything?"


    "Hmm."


    "Do you really have to? Just read my mind like you did earlier and guess."


    Where else could I possibly go? I was simply planning to go to the Kamian office and leisurely wander around without any particular purpose.


    Kamian shifted their weight to one side, standing nonchalantly. Their somewhat rebellious posture made me involuntarily shift my gaze elsewhere.


    "Don''t play games with me. Just tell me where you''re going."


    "If someone sees us, they might mistake you for my father."


    "I''m not joking."


    "Well, what should we do then?"


    "I''ll take you there. Where is it?"


    "Forget it. Just go wherever you were planning to go."


    "Liv."


    It was all just a playful banter, but the atmosphere was growing more hostile than I had anticipated. Kamian seemed determined not to take a step back unless I revealed my destination. I had no desire to fight with them over such a trivial prank.


    "I was just planning to follow you. Why do you keep prying?"


    "......"

 Chapter 19 - Cautious

    With narrowed eyes and a grave expression, Kamian let out a weary sigh. Then, with a noticeably relaxed face, he firmly adjusted my clothes.


    "What is there to worry about?"


    "You''re extraordinary, that''s what."


    "Don''t act all surprised when you already know. I''m genuinely startled."


    "Don''t play innocent now, of all times."


    I pushed Kamian aside and stepped outside. The air was chilly, but the wind wasn''t too strong to withstand.


    "Need a hand?"


    Kamian quickly caught up beside me, pointing to her own back.


    "Where are we going?"


    "To Mr. Holt''s place."


    "What? It''s nearby."


    As we walked, our long strides matched each other''s.


    "I''ll be inside the house when we arrive."


    "And you?"


    "I have to help with chopping firewood. It stirs up a lot of dust, which isn''t good for my lungs. So, don''t come near."


    "Aw..."


    Although I wanted to stay by Kamian''s side, I restrained myself upon hearing the mention of the detrimental effects on my lungs. Winter seemed to exacerbate my occasional coughing fits. Even a small cold could pose a significant challenge to my body, so I had to be cautious about everything.


    "If you think it''ll be boring, you can go back now."


    "No, it''s exercise and a walk combined. It''s also interesting to chat with Aunt Nella."


    Holt''s household was a diverse neighbourhood where people frequently came and went. It wasn''t the most comfortable place, but on free weekends, it would suddenly come to mind. As soon as we arrived at Holt''s, Kamian disappeared with Holt, and I enjoyed the warm honey tea offered by Nella.


    "...Can you imagine how surprised Kamian must have been when he carried you all the way to our house at such a young age?"


    "I feel like I''ve heard this story at least ten times."


    "Well, then let''s make it the eleventh telling. Kamian was drenched in rain while you had multiple layers of clothing protecting you."


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    "So, I didn''t get a single drop of rain on me, but my clothes were soaked with cold sweat?"


    "That''s right. On top of that, Debra and Jex were attending a relative''s wedding that day. How flustered must Kamian have been while you were burning up with fever? But she remained calm, without shedding a tear."


    "Wow... That kid is truly something."


    "It was fortunate we had fever-reducing medicine at home. Ah, just thinking about it still makes my heart race."


    I mechanically responded with a vague nod. Hearing the same story over ten times about an incident from when I was nine years old was undoubtedly tedious and tiresome.


    My tea cup was more than halfway empty, while Nella''s cup remained untouched since I first poured it. I hadn''t taken a single sip due to the stifling praise from Kamian.


    "So, Liv, when are you two getting married?"


    Whenever I meet my neighbours, I no longer find their repeated inquiries significant enough to merit attention.


    "We are friends. We aren''t married."


    "Oh my, what kind of friendship is it when both you and Kamian are practically dying for each other?"


    Her words struck me a little. It is true that Kamian likes me, but I do not reciprocate those feelings. I harbour tender emotions for Kamian, but they do not extend to love. And I must never allow myself to fall in love with Kamian.


    "It''s a misunderstanding."


    Nella clicked her tongue disapprovingly.


    "Don''t let your guard down. What if Kamian moves on to someone else?"


    "Well, that would be a blessing. I would genuinely offer my heartfelt congratulations."


    "You''re uttering nonsense you don''t mean."


    "Please don''t belittle my sincerity. I mean it."


    A hearty laughter danced upon my furrowed face. Nella nodded, as if understanding, but her expression didn''t betray any belief in my words. She can think as she pleases.


    I gulped down a mouthful of sweet tea.


    As the tea settled, Kamian returned as the sun began to set. Their sleeves were folded up to their elbows, as if unaffected by the chill. Their robust, muscular forearms stood out prominently.


    "Let''s go."


    "Sure."


    Before I could even grab my coat, Kamian was already holding it out for me to wear comfortably. They are quick. They swiftly put their arms through each sleeve and meticulously straightened the front.


    "Now, each takes one of these."


    Holt emerged and handed carved wooden figures of a bird and a bear to Kamian. True to Holt''s craftsmanship, the bear''s teeth and the bird''s wings were exquisitely detailed, leaving one in awe.


    "Can we really take these with us?"


    "Compared to what you''ve done for us, this is nothing."


    I stared at the carvings with wide-open eyes. What should I choose? The bird is impressive, but I feel the bear exudes more grandeur. If I place it in front of my window, it might even scare away ghosts. Once I made up my mind, the bear vanished before my eyes.


    ...That rascal?


    Kamian held the wooden figure in one hand and expressed gratitude to Holt. I reluctantly accepted the bird.


    I refrained from arguing with Holt about whether this was better or that was better, as it seemed impolite.


    And when Holt''s house was nearly out of sight, I flicked my fingers toward Kamian.


    "Give me the bear."

 Chapter 20 - Artwork

    "We must have a volunteer militia in our town as well. The curfew hasn''t even been lifted, yet they''re installing a gang of thugs."


    "Where is it written that we must choose without reaching an agreement? Your impudence knows no bounds."


    In truth, there was nothing to say even if Kamian took both sculptures since he had worked tirelessly on them alone. However, knowing he wasn''t the kind of person to be deceitful or petty, I purposely acted more brazenly.


    Instead of taking the bear from Kamian''s hand, I handed him a bird. As I folded each finger around it, I heard a faint sound of laughter escaping.


    "I might join the militia after graduating from the academy."


    "But there must be some financial gain in being part of the militia."


    "To wake up and be robbed of one''s belongings, one must have a sense of injustice to work without payment."


    I comforted Kamian by patting his back.


    "When you become an admirable member of the militia, return this bear sculpture. Stay strong until then."


    As the bear sculpture nestled in his hand, a tune involuntarily hummed from his lips. I took one step forward, and Kamian followed behind me. Underneath the elongated evening twilight, maple leaves rustled and gently fell.


    Conversations about living a peaceful daily life and naturally envisioning the future left a tender ache in my heart. I am not truly ''Liv,'' and Kamian is not an honest country youth. However, at this moment, as Liv and Kamian who were born and raised in this town, and who would continue to live together, we faced each other.


    I hope this play will have a happy ending, although we cannot predict when the final curtain will fall. When we remove our masks and return to our original lives... Even if we feel a bittersweet aftertaste in the intoxication of the lingering emotions, I want to avoid the tragedy of being unable to escape our roles and meet our end.


    * * *


    Kamian, who had showered and come out before me, was lying stretched out on my bed. In his hands, he held a novel different from the one he had been reading before. His reading speed was remarkably swift. I wondered when he found the time to read while he was busy running around all day. Doesn''t he ever sleep?


    "Why are you here?" I asked.


    "This place helps me concentrate," he replied.


    I scoffed at his words. It was simply an excuse; he had come because he wanted to see me... Wait a minute. I hastily tossed the towel that was wrapped around my head and grasped the desk.


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    "Where''s my bear?"


    "Why are you asking me?"


    "Because you were in my room."


    "It wasn''t me. Don''t suspect me."


    The bear figurine I had placed on the desk near the window had mysteriously disappeared. The actions of the person who had shown interest in the bear and boasted about it while on patrol flashed through my mind. What kind of person thinks of becoming a police officer? Such a thief shouldn''t wear that uniform!


    I slumped down next to Kamian.


    "Speak some words of comfort," I said.


    "Don''t talk nonsense," he replied with a touch of sarcasm.


    "I''m the one who catches thieves."


    I snatched the book he was reading. Kamian let out a sigh that seemed more like a lament. He then rose to his feet and stared at me with a cold expression.


    "A thief?"


    "Who says that? Bad habits die hard, even when you''re seventy. I don''t think I can just overlook your mischievous ways."


    "Hey, what are you doing...!"


    It was clear that the bear figurine was hidden somewhere on Kamian''s body. If Kamian had asked for the bear figurine, I would have gladly handed it over. But to engage in such a vulgar act... I couldn''t just let it slide.


    I felt his thick forearms and chest, brushing against his abs. Kamian was in a feeble position, unable to do anything against my strength, with his arms raised awkwardly.


    "If I find it, be prepared to get a taste of the bear figurine on your head," I warned.


    "Keep your hands off me. I''ll turn my pockets inside out to show you..."


    "What''s this?"


    Kamian took a deep breath, and I could feel the tension in his stiffened muscles. I caught him red-handed. I tightly gripped what was on his right thigh. It was large and substantial, about the same size as the bear figurine.


    "What is this, huh? Are you still going to play dumb?"


    "..."


    Kamian''s ears turned as red as if they were about to burst. He seemed to understand that stealing was a shameful act. After mocking him, he shook something weighty from side to side. Kamian grimaced and twitched in response. His eye area flushed with a pinkish hue.


    "Kamian, speak up. Well?"


    "...Take your hands off me."


    "Start by explaining what happened."


    If he showed sincere remorse, I might consider giving him a little leniency. Depending on his actions, I might even simply give the artwork to Kamian.


    "Leave, just for a moment...Ugh."


    However, his reaction was peculiar. He seemed to be pondering something, and he also appeared to be in pain. I wondered if the artwork had pricked his skin, so I grabbed it and lifted it up. Then, Kamian jumped up, straightened his back, and grabbed my shoulders. His eyes were slightly moistened with tears.


    "Kamian, why did you..."


    I felt a squirming sensation in my hand. My entire focus was directed towards my palm. The wooden artwork, which was not supposed to expand on its own, was growing larger and larger in my hand.


    No way.


    Kamian''s breathing became shallow. By the time he realized it, it was too late.


    "What you held and shook... is my flesh"


    "..."

 Chapter 21 - Restless

    Her heart surged with such intensity that it felt as if it would burst through her bones. Meanwhile, her mouth hardened, rigid like plaster. The accident came to a complete halt.


    "Could you please let go?"


    Startled, as though she had touched something terrible, she quickly withdrew her hand. Thud. It fell neatly and rolled under the bed. Kamian, calling my name, approached, but I, without feeling any pain, flicked my hand toward him.


    "Are you alri... I, I''m sorry. No, I, I''m not hurt."


    One of Kamian''s eyebrows arched in surprise. I kept my gaze down and caught sight of his bulging pants. Thud. Dry saliva involuntarily rolled down my throat. My ears burned as if they were about to explode.


    "Well, um... I''ll solve it. I''ll be outside."


    And he rushed out as if escaping. However, besides my room, Kamian''s room was the only place for me to go in this house. Familiarly, I entered his room and flipped the blanket all the way to the top.


    "This is maddening."


    The scent of him, which was buried throughout the room, flooded into my nostrils. Restless, I anxiously paced back and forth.


    Not only had I sexually harassed Kamian, but I also found his scent alluring. I felt like I had become an irredeemable piece of trash. Instead of running away like this, I had to apologize to Kamian properly.


    A string of curses swirled on the tip of my tongue. Any form of apology would sound embarrassing and eerie. I clenched my fists, pacing around the bed.


    "I''m going crazy, I''m going crazy."


    But no matter what emotions I harboured, apologizing for the terrible memory I had left Kamian was the right thing to do.


    Suppressing the despicable thought of pretending it didn''t happen and brushing it off, I lifted the blanket and revealed it. Then, with determination, I marched to the front of my bedroom. Phew. Taking a deep breath, I raised my hand to knock.


    "[Sniff¡­]"


    An embarrassing sound stopped my hand. I stiffened, my body rigid, only my eyes blinked.


    Did I mishear?


    However, the sound of flesh colliding resonated distinctly through the gaps of the old wooden door. And within that, there was a faint trace of heated breath. I pressed my hands over my mouth, trying to silence any sound.


    Kamian was masturbating in my room.


    "Mmm... Hah, Liv..."


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    Calling my name.


    I stared at the closed door with a bewildered look. It wasn''t the fact that he was masturbating in my room and calling my name that puzzled me, but rather the feelings directed towards myself. Why couldn''t I leave and stop listening to this sound?


    The heat emanating from beyond the room seeped into me. As his breathing grew rougher, my body became stiff, tingling sensations rippling through. I even had the illusion of his large, fiery hands exploring every inch of my body.


    "Ugh... Ah."


    I flinched, my shoulders trembling. The sound of flesh colliding grew louder by the moment. Even the moans that escaped breathlessly had taken on an unmistakably explicit nature. It was as if they deliberately wanted me to hear their lewd sounds, a depraved cacophony that echoed with intention.


    I felt as if I stood in the midst of a tempest. The raging sensations left me helpless, my legs quivering uncontrollably. The sound of someone gripping and shaking it increased in tempo. My name repeatedly reached my ears from beyond the door, accompanied by a breath hotter than anything I had ever known.


    "Haah, Liv."


    Finally, as Kamian called my name, reaching the climax, I kneeled down and succumbed. With all the strength I could muster, I pressed my hands tightly against my mouth to prevent any moans from escaping.


    * * *


    The bear sculpture, due to its uneven bottom surface, was unable to stand on its own and had toppled over behind the desk. Once I leaned its back against the wall, it finally found a stable position.


    To treat Kamian''s work as a mere sculpture without properly examining it, it was entirely my fault without considering the right or wrong.


    And I still haven''t apologized to Kamian. Ever since I heard the sound of his self-gratification, his face has become even more embarrassingly daunting to behold. I couldn''t even bring myself to utter a single word, let alone offer an apology, as my face flushed at the mere sight of his profile.


    Kamian, too, spoke only the bare minimum necessary to me, without engaging in any further conversation. There was not a single exchange of dialogue during our journey to the academy, with him stoically carrying me on his broad back.


    We both sensed an intense self-consciousness toward one another, yet outwardly we treated each other as mere acquaintances. No, perhaps this self-consciousness was mine alone.


    Our peculiar dynamic continued even after arriving at the academy. Kamian didn''t save a spot for me, and likewise, I had no intention of sitting next to him. I settled for a position where I could barely glimpse the back of his head. Have we ever sat so far apart from each other? I searched my memory slowly, but nothing came to mind.


    "Did you two fight?" Tessa inquired as if it were a trivial matter. I held my chin, fixing my gaze upon Kamian''s dark-haired back.


    "We didn''t fight..."


    I committed an act that I should never have done to him.


    "I can tell that you did."


    "But I didn''t."


    "Isn''t your village busy with the harvest season these days? Instead of wasting your energy elsewhere, you should focus on replenishing your strength and helping with the work."


    "I''m managing on my own."


    "Are you telling me that someone like you fought with Kamian?"


    "...I''m not in a position to fight or not."


    Tessa clicked her tongue as if she had expected this outcome. She was making hasty judgments without knowing the exact circumstances. It felt unjust for Tessa to treat me so harshly, even though I did commit a grave offense against Kamian.


    You may not know, but if he were to sneeze, he could turn this academy into a blazing inferno and still be hailed as a hero. To be looked upon with disdain as someone who merely touched his manhood... Ah, it''s all pointless lamentation.


    Setting aside the future, considering only the facts at hand, it was not Kamian but myself who committed this outrageous transgression without even offering an apology.

 Chapter 22 - Subjected

    "Stop mumbling awkwardly and apologize quickly."


    Tessa gestured towards Kamian with a tilt of her chin. Around him, a group of college students had gathered, forming a noisy crowd. I wondered what they were talking about. The undergraduates chattered away, not so much engaging in a conversation as observing Kamian''s every move. Their desire to get closer to him was palpable. I was curious to see what expression Kamian would wear amidst their company. I imagined him wearing an indifferent facade, his black nape exposed as he looked straight ahead.


    "Stop glaring and apologize," Tessa said.


    "...I wasn''t glaring," I replied.


    "Honestly, where can you find a friend like Kamian? Even if you''re just childhood friends, it''s not usual for someone to go through your entire textbook, constantly help you with assignments, and rush to the lawmaker''s office every time you collapse. If you hadn''t snapped at me, claiming you weren''t in a romantic relationship with Kamian, I almost would have believed it with all my heart."


    Having heard praises for Kamian, I felt no inspiration. Why is she praising him to me? Yet, there was one part that bothered me. I turned my head to face Tessa.


    "Am I getting angry?"


    Tessa let out a frustrated sigh.


    "Don''t you remember? It wasn''t long after we entered school. When the kids asked if you were going to marry Kamian, you screamed and cried, saying it wasn''t true. Then you fainted. Do you know how shocked I was?"


    As I listened, a faint memory resurfaced, buried in the passage of time.


    It must have been around the end of our second year. The distrust towards Kamian hadn''t completely faded by then. To the children who were busy teasing me, claiming that I would get together with Kamian at the slightest touch, Tessa and I were just a source of amusement.


    Although my body was that of a minor, my mind possessed the maturity of an adult, so I could easily brush off such mockery with a laugh.


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    However, apart from being the subject of mockery, I had a fear that the children''s playful words could become a catalyst for Kamian to realize emotions beyond our contractual relationship. Moreover, at that time, it was when I would scream all night, tormented by excruciating pain as if my body and mind were being carved out. Unable to control my incomplete body and mind, I expressed the surging emotions without restraint.


    After assuring Tessa that I was by no means in such a relationship with Kamian, not long after, he approached me separately and suggested that we go to school together.


    Tessa tapped my forehead lightly with her index finger.


    "Losing my person just because you couldn''t even manage to apologize is a loss."


    "I understand. I will apologize."


    "However, whenever I laid eyes on that rascal''s face, the resounding echoes of yesterday''s heated breath reverberated in my ears, tormenting me ceaselessly. It was as if he effortlessly conveyed a scorching energy that I couldn''t dare ignore."


    Despite Tessa''s subtle hints, I remained silent, unable to utter a single word, let alone apologize to Kamian until all the lectures were over.


    Kamian, who had stepped outside the main gate before me, stood leaning against a tree. As I approached, Kamian silently revealed their back and bent their knees. On their rigid shoulders, lilac petals rested like snowflakes. After brushing them away with a flick of their hand, Kamian straightened up without a word exchanged between us.


    Business relationships need not be so rigid.


    With each step I took, my body swayed to a steady rhythm. Leaning my cheek against my shoulder, I observed the scenery passing by leisurely. However, my mind was in a state of profound confusion, rendering it difficult to truly appreciate the tranquillity of nature.


    To associate the vast expanse of land, infused with the scent of delicate grass and ripened autumn trees, with a wretched sculpture of a phallus that I had touched yesterday¡ªhow absurd it seemed. I truly felt a bitter taste in my mouth. Such nonsensical grumblings echoed beneath my tongue.


    Oh, why must that wretched organ be so ignorantly large? I mean, mistaking me for a sculpture... it''s utterly absurd.


    Blaming Kamian''s extraordinary physique for the calamity I caused yesterday would only make me look like a sulking fool.


    Since I couldn''t possibly ask the devilish Kamian for absolution, apologizing was the only way to rectify yesterday''s disaster. And now was the perfect timing for it. Without looking at his face, and at a moment when no one might overhear, precisely now.


    After a dry throat let out a single quiver, I simply opened my mouth.


    "Regarding what happened yesterday,"


    "What are you trying to say?"

 Chapter 23 - Agony

    "I was sorry," Kamian interrupted, just as he was about to say it. The fleeting moment shattered the feeble grip he had on the courage to speak.


    The carefully crafted words of apology, albeit brief, evaporated from his mind. What should he say? His head was spinning.


    "Um... y-yes, I mistook your thing there for a bear figurine, and I apologize."


    "..."


    There was no response from Kamian. Whether it was okay or whether he would curse, anything would have been better than his mouth remaining shut. The unbearable discomfort tightened the nerves.


    "...That''s why you were born with such a thing."


    Kamian, walking with a steady pace, suddenly stumbled. As his body leaned forward, instinctively I wrapped my arm tightly around his neck. After quickly regaining his balance, Kamian let out an annoyed sigh and resumed walking.


    "Oh, it''s not your fault. If it sounded unpleasant, I apologize for that too."


    "..."


    "I''ve been brainwashed since I was young that it''s a **** pepper, so naturally, I thought there would be a pepper in your pants, but I never thought there would be a bear figurine..."


    "What?"


    "So, what I mean is, your possession is blessed among the pepper fields. It''s top-notch."


    Kamian finally stopped in his tracks. I felt his back swell as he took a deep breath. Even though my apology had gone wrong, I realized that it had been wrong for quite some time and buried my face in his shoulder.


    Then, I whispered words of comfort.


    "...With someone like you, you can be loved by a woman. I guarantee it."


    He spoke with a sinking voice, as he had quietly listened all along.


    "Do you want me to get off?"


    We were right in front of the house. It wasn''t a distance we couldn''t walk, but I didn''t want to get off.


    "No."


    "Then, just keep your mouth shut."


    ...Arrogant brat. How dare anyone tell someone else to keep their mouth shut? However, I, who had committed a wrongdoing, obediently kept my mouth shut until we arrived home.


    * * *


    As expected, the apology yielded only unintended consequences.


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    A crisp, refreshing breeze blew through the Kamian, yet it remained dutifully attentive to my well-being. However, all traces of our customary banter had vanished without a trace, along with the vibrant expressions that used to emerge whenever I teased. Kamian''s lips were firmly sealed, dedicated to supporting my exercise routine and attending to our meals with a meticulous, businesslike manner.


    The daily barrage of reprimands, once reaching a hundred a day, had now dwindled to a mere handful. The reduction was not due to Kamian giving up on scolding me in anger but rather a change in my own attitude.


    Having committed the wretched sin of harassment, I found myself prostrating before Kamian, pleading for forgiveness. Repeating the behaviours he had previously pointed out only served to ignite his anger. Merely refraining from noisily devouring my meals or pushing myself to exhaustion during exercise resulted in a significant decrease in reprimands.


    The problem, however, lay in the complete absence of conversation. I would have preferred even a scolding, as it would naturally lead to a few more words being exchanged between us. The unyielding silence from that obstinate mouth felt bitterly resentful. Uncomfortable, disheartened, and remorseful... The rough surface of these emotions painfully tumbled within my chest.


    "When will you return?"


    Having observed him closely all the while, I mustered the courage to speak a single sentence.


    Kamian, who had been shuttling back and forth due to the harvest, immediately grabbed his coat once dinner was over.


    I pulled both of my knees close to my chest as I sat on the sofa, resting my chin on them. Kamian glanced at me with a mischievous smile and extended his long legs, swiftly approaching. His large hand lightly pressed against my cheek before touching my forehead.


    "You have a fever."


    "Really? I feel fine, though."


    My defective body experienced unpredictable surges and drops in body temperature.


    For a while, it had remained quiet, but it seemed it was starting again. Still, I preferred having a fever over experiencing a decrease in body temperature. When my body temperature dropped, my hands and feet naturally became as cold as ice, and even my veins seemed frozen, hindering the flow of blood. Despite lying in front of the fireplace, bundled up in multiple layers of clothing, the chilling cold pierced through my flesh and constricted my breathing. Helpless, trembling uncontrollably, I had no choice but to endure those dreadful moments.


    Enduring the agony, where the high fever seemed to melt away every organ, was relatively better since I could faint at any moment.


    Kamian''s hand withdrew from my forehead, and I gently placed the back of my hand against it. It seemed slightly warm.


    Kamian returned with a glass bottle containing a red liquid and a spoon after setting aside his overcoat. It was a fever-reducing concoction made from steeping medicinal flowers. One should not imagine the sweet taste we experienced in Korea. When I first tasted it, the nauseating flavour and aroma of the pungent herbs made me spit it out immediately.


    As I gazed at the shimmering red liquid on the spoon, an involuntary frown crossed my face.


    "Ah."


    Kamian opened his mouth obediently. As the medicine entered his mouth, he held his nose and gulped it down. Breathing through his nose was prohibited for a while.


    After emptying the water handed to him by Kamian , he put a candy in his mouth and finally exhaled the withheld breath.


    "Let''s sleep early before the fever rises further."


    "When will you come?"


    "After you fall asleep."


    "And when will I fall asleep?"


    "It feels like it hasn''t even been a minute since I told you to sleep early."


    "Don''t command me..."


    She was about to speak sharply as usual, but then pursed her lips. She couldn''t afford to be in such a position because she hadn''t properly apologized. Biting the flesh inside her lips, she opened her mouth again. And timidly retorted.


    "I can''t sleep. I don''t feel like sleeping early."

 Chapter 24 - Affection

    Kamian looked at me silently with an unreadable expression.


    "You''re late today."


    Before long, Kamian said in a slow tone.


    "How late?"


    I caught his words and immediately retorted. Kamian ''s eyes narrowed slightly. I was slightly taken aback by that subtle change in expression.


    "If you have something to say, say it now. Don''t make me wait."


    "...To be so straightforward..."


    "If it''s difficult to speak openly, then write a letter and Liv it on my desk."


    No matter how much I shook and scolded, isn''t this reaction a bit too much? No, even if I curse and raise my voice saying that nothing will go well near me, there''s nothing to say...


    Disappointment and remorse collided, creating confusion in my mind. However, the disappointment didn''t last long, as it quickly retreated to a corner. The overwhelming guilt weighing heavily on my heart was immense.


    I let out a deep sigh while wiggling my toes on the sofa. In truth, if I had apologized properly, Kamian wouldn''t have been this angry.


    "...I''m sorry."


    "I understand."


    Kamian responded with an apologetic tone. Having been observing his actions all day, it was even more frustrating that he couldn''t perceive my true feelings. However... speaking so openly about it was out of the question. Usually, when you apologize, you''re supposed to express your perspective on the matter, right? Did I say those words because I wanted to let him know that I was sorry?


    Even if he had ignored my apology, he wouldn''t have been as bewildered as he is now. Nevertheless, I resolved to offer a more sincere apology instead of getting into an argument.


    "I apologize for accusing you of theft. And for casually touching your belongings. It was truly a mistake. I didn''t do it to taunt you."


    "Don''t apologize. It''s not like you''re saying sorry for touching my d*ck.


    "Pardon?"


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    I asked, but instead of responding, Kamian put on his coat and walked out. Left alone, his words echoed relentlessly in my mind, raising countless question marks.


    "Why are you acting like this towards me?"


    Sitting alone on the couch, I pondered for a while. Even after lying down on the bed, guided by Debra''s hand, Kamian ''s words wouldn''t Liv my thoughts.


    Then, suddenly, one possibility came to mind.


    "Do you no longer love me?"


    Wasn''t he angry with me, but rather his feelings had grown cold? If the reason Kamian started treating me indifferently wasn''t because he was angry about the incident but because ''affection'' had departed, then that, in fact, would be a positive development.


    My emotions flipped like the back of a hand, and a bitter taste lingered in my mouth as my demeanor grew chillingly unyielding.


    Yet, it''s bearable. In fact, I convinced myself that this was for the better. At some point, this was how things were meant to be, and it was only brought forward by an unexpected accident.


    As the puzzle pieces fell into place, my mind settled and the speed of my thoughts became more serene. I pulled the blanket up to my chest and closed my eyes.


    However, it seemed that my earlier remark to Kamian about not feeling sleepy had taken root. Sleep simply wouldn''t come. In the darkened room, my two eyes sparkled vividly.


    No matter how I adjusted my posture, drowsiness wouldn''t settle upon my eyelids. Was there unfinished work... Ah, it seems that I didn''t exercise much today. That''s why I''m so energetic. Tomorrow, even if I have to push myself a little, I must run a long distance.


    A few soft, unstable sections of terrain came to mind, where the inclines weren''t too steep. I divided the course into smaller sections. Even then, it would barely cover half the distance to the Academy. When will this feeble body become strong and robust? When will that day come?


    The melancholy thoughts seeped in slowly due to the night air. I let out a deep sigh and expelled them. The fact that Kamian no longer liked me was already a significant accomplishment. There was no reason to delve into other gloomy musings here. It would be futile to raise a toast in such circumstances.


    I gazed at the black ceiling and closed my eyes. At that moment, I heard footsteps on the wooden stairs, climbing up to the second floor. Reflexively, my body jolted upright. I felt as though I would open the door and dash out immediately, but then I relaxed my body, deflating like a balloon.


    What could I possibly do now by looking at Kamian? There was nothing to say. If I had to choose my words carefully, perhaps something like, "You''ve been through a lot. Sleep well." But opening the door and going out to greet her in the middle of the night just to utter those words would be a ludicrous act.


    As I was about to lie back in bed, I heard a knocking sound. I was startled as if I had seen a ghost. It was extremely rare for Kamian to visit my room in the middle of the night. Except for occasions when I was bedridden and in need of nursing care or when I was conscious...


    "Ah."


    There was one other possibility.


    "Liv."


    A moist, sinking voice came from beyond the door. What should I do? How should I handle this? I turned my head and stared at the direction of the door.


    Once or twice a year, Kamian would knock on my door in the middle of the night like this. Usually, she would be in a drunken state.

 Chapter 25 - Confession

    Usually, on the day after the harvest, people in the village would gather for a small, intimate celebration. Kamian, who was not fond of alcohol and only wore his best attire on special occasions, was accustomed to receiving drinks from various individuals, as he was considered the hero of the harvest season. Without any hesitation, Kamian would graciously accept the drinks, enjoying them to the fullest, often being the first to lose his composure.


    Today, however, the act of drinking puzzled me. I suddenly found myself questioning it. Feeling the need to shed some light on the matter, I lit the lamp on the table. The flame flickered, casting a warm orange glow throughout the room.


    As soon as my feet touched the ground by the bed, I heard a small thud. Startled, I hurriedly made my way to the door and pulled the handle. Kamian, who had been resting his forehead against the door, lost his balance and tumbled towards me.


    "Hey, no! Wait..." I tried to catch his bulky frame with my fragile body, but it was an impossible feat. My mind quickly assessed the situation, and I commanded my body to step aside, allowing Kamian''s resistance to send him stumbling forward.


    [Thud] The sound reverberated through the floor, surely reaching the room below. I scratched the back of my head, feeling a sense of frustration, and gathered my knees to sit beside Kamian. He remained motionless on the floor, his forehead still pressed against it.


    Is he dead?


    "Hey."


    I poked his arm, and Kamian took a deep breath before flipping himself over. His dishevelled bangs revealed his forehead. I placed my hand on his smooth forehead, feeling its warmth seep into my palm.


    "It must hurt."


    Kamian fluttered his long eyelashes and closed his eyes for a brief moment before reopening them. His intoxicated state made his pupils appear hazy. However, to me, they seemed teary, as if he was about to cry.


    "You look ridiculous now, even though you won''t remember any of this anyway."


    If I had a phone in my hand, I would have taken a hundred pictures. I sighed, filled with regret.


    Intoxicated Kamian displayed aspects of himself that he would never reveal in his sober state. Behind his sharp and nonchalant facade, his vulnerable side emerged alongside his drunkenness.


    Kamian tried to grab my hand and placed it on his cheek. He gently tilted his head, rubbing his face against my palm, reminiscent of a playful puppy. What are you doing? Sighing, I couldn''t hold back a mischievous laughter.


    I enjoy witnessing Kamian inebriated. The way he acts cute, obedient, and willingly accepts the teasing, despite the wounds inflicted upon him, is simply amusing. The next day, when Kamian would have no recollection, I could tease him even more daringly. That''s why I had even attempted to force him to drink on a few occasions, but I had failed every time.


    "...Don''t apologize."


    His unexpected remark caught me off guard, and I choked on my laughter.


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    "What?"


    "For touching my d*ck... It''s okay."


    All of Kamian''s intoxicated words were genuine. With a different hand, I gently brushed Kamian''s head and nodded. It was a statement I had anticipated enough. I had already noticed that the reason Kamian had been distant and cold towards me today was not due to anger, but rather because the affection he once held for me had vanished.


    "Yes."


    "I won''t be like that anymore."


    Kamian whispered, his lips lightly touching my palm. His breath and low vibrations clung subtly to my skin.


    "What?"


    "I won''t let you see... me like that. I''m sorry."


    I couldn''t possibly comprehend the thoughts of a man abruptly apologizing. Kamian''s boldly arched eyebrows were now sadly furrowed.


    Kamian gently tugged at my hand. I obediently lowered my face as he desired. Placing my ear near his lips, the hot breath pierced into my ear canal. Instantly, a shiver ran down the back of my neck.


    "I already knew."


    "..."


    He spoke in a hushed voice, as if whispering a secret.


    "You were there in front of my door that day."


    I immediately recognized which day he was referring to. It was impossible not to know. The day when Kamian mast*rbated alone in my room. His red irises emitted an alluring light in the darkness. [Thump, thump, thump]. My heart pounded fiercely, so close that I felt as if I could hear its rhythm. Just as I thought my heartbeats were becoming audible, Kamian once again pulled my hand toward his mouth and lightly nibbled on his lips.


    "...So, you avoided me because of that?"


    Kamian shook his head.


    "It''s not because you dislike me?"


    His composed face abruptly contorted. The flesh that protruded beneath his thumb was pressed down beneath this firm exterior.


    "You like me."


    "..."


    Drunk Kamian confesses without hesitation. Fanning himself with a folding fan against his fiery face, he exhaled a hollow breath.


    "Don''t say that. I like you a lot."


    "I know... so, stop saying it."


    The reason he distanced himself from me was nothing other than self-loathing. My expectations had taken a favourable turn. And how cunningly people can reveal their knowledge; the buried resentment and injustice surged forth. He''s the one who did wrong, so why does he make me suffer?


    "What''s this? I apologize for no reason, then."


    Even if Kamian spoke honestly, he would have apologized. Now, however, he showed an unnecessary stubbornness, pouting and grumbling.


    "Yes, but please be careful from now on."


    "...Uh, sorry."


    With a distant gaze and a firm voice, she offered her apology. Reflexively, I apologized again.


    "I''ve been having a difficult time because you appeared naked in my dream. It feels like I''ve been dreaming about you for days."


    "It must have been hard for you..."


    I swore to myself that I wouldn''t let my gaze wander between her legs. Kamian smiled sweetly, curling her eyelashes. Then she closed her eyes and let out a deep, measured breath.


    "Are you going to sleep?"


    Silence returned as the answer. Slowly, I freed my hand from her big hand and covered her with a blanket. With the sound of steady breathing settling in the room, drowsiness gradually overtook my tired eyes.


    * * *

 Chapter 26 - Embarrassment

    "Hey, am I okay? In the course of a person''s life, they might get caught masturbating. I suppose demons are no different."


    Kamian repeated the same words several times while perched on his back. He gazed proudly at his ears, which had turned crimson as if they were about to burst.


    Knowing the truth, Kamian''s behaviour of keeping his distance from me felt quite different.


    The bashful Kamian, burdened with embarrassment, deliberately avoided looking me in the eye and would blush at the slightest hint of a prolonged conversation.


    What thoughts were swirling in that thick skull of his? What kind of dreams did he have? Perverted bastard. However, my reflection in the mirror was smiling like a more sinister deviant. If it were this eerie visage, I could understand why Kamian would avoid me.


    I relentlessly chased after Kamian, who was filled with shame and avoided me, and said, "I heard water sounds early this morning. Did you wash your underwear? It''s fine, I understand." This lewd remark continued for days, until Kamian slammed the bed down and sat up.


    I crawled after him all the way to the room and sat beside the bed, bowing my head and chuckling.


    "What did I say while drunk? Tell me."


    "Just, well... something about your second lustful self...?"


    "Ha, what on earth does that mean?"


    As I gestured subtly with my gaze towards the area between his legs, Kamian lifted the blanket and covered his lower body.


    Laughter erupted once again at the sight of a bachelor-like figure threatened by sympathy.


    "When you''re like this, I can''t help but want to tease you."


    "Leave."


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    "Alright. I''m going, I am."


    I felt Kamian''s gaze stubbornly sticking to the back of my head. Holding onto the doorknob, I turned around with a sigh.


    "Oh, I guess I''ll get to see you drunk again."


    "...."


    "Harvest season will be over soon."


    "This time, I won''t drink."


    With a tone filled with regret, I asked, "Why?" I had the leeway to reassure him by saying it''s because I dislike nonsense.


    "It''s the day of the party in two weeks."


    "...What?"


    Startled by the unexpected words, the mischievousness that had surged within me scattered like a flock of birds taking flight.


    "You know what happens when I drink," I said.


    Why of all things... why now... does Kamian''s penis come to mind? The thick, blunt sensation I had felt with my hands and the rigid touch that had reached between my legs came alive again as vividly as yesterday. I clenched and released my stiffened hand, feeling a dull ache.


    "...Yeah, right."


    I had intended to tease him, but instead, I found myself flustered.


    Several wicked words that could have turned his ears red still lingered, but my mouth remained silent. The muscles of my face stiffened, making it impossible for me to muster a playful smile.


    "Do you have anything else to say?"


    "No?"


    Feeling inexplicably embarrassed, my voice involuntarily rose. Anyone could see that I looked like a thief with a guilty conscience.


    Kamian leaned his face against his raised arms on his knees, staring at me intently. Cold sweat trickled down my back.


    ...Imagining a penis itself is not a sin, right? So, I haven''t done anything wrong. I can stand tall.


    Without taking his eyes off me, Kamian spoke in a low husky voice.


    "Aren''t you going out?"


    "I was about to go out just now."


    As I hastily turned around, the sound of his voice seized the nape of my neck.


    "Why is your face turning red?"


    "... "


    Caught in the act. I tightly shut my eyes, overcome with desolation. The tables had turned. Kamian had become the one in control of our relationship.

 Chapter 27 - Peculiar Dreams

    I could hear the sound of Kamian rising from his seat and walking toward me. As his presence drew nearer, a shiver ran up my spine, not born out of fear. It was a tingling sensation, as if an electric current flowed through my veins, making my toes tingle and my skin quiver.


    [Thump]. Kamian''s muscular arm rested next to my face. He grasped the doorframe and lowered his head close to mine.


    "I don''t understand," he said.


    "...What?"


    "That bratty kid who used to smirk and mock suddenly blushes and runs away."


    "He''s just hot-headed."


    "Is that so?"


    "It is!"


    Without warning, his large hand grasped my cheek and then touched my forehead. This contact, a daily occurrence, felt like a blow to the chest. It was all because of that damn penis-like bear figurine.


    "You''re really hot-tempered."


    "Really?"


    I pushed Kamian''s hand away, touched my forehead, and examined various parts of my body. It was clear that my body temperature was higher than usual. The fever had not subsided yet.


    "You''re speaking differently than before."


    Kamian''s words were laced with laughter. Oh, I was doomed. As I raised my head, he brushed aside my hair with a smile on his lips, revealing my ear.


    It wasn''t meant to create a romantic atmosphere.


    "Your ears are turning red too."


    "......"


    He deliberately exposed my ears, knowing it would make me more embarrassed. He couldn''t be anything but cruel.


    "What did you imagine to make it turn out like this? Huh?"


    I pressed my hot cheek with the back of my hand and looked at him intently. Kamian tilted his head diagonally, and his well-groomed hair moved slightly, revealing his symmetrical forehead.


    "You idiot."


    "......"


    I pushed Kamian away with my elbow (or rather, he gave in and moved back), and left the room.


    I descended to the first floor with quick steps, as if someone was chasing after me. It felt like my whole body, not just my face, would ignite. I didn''t want to play along with his teasing, so I just spoke the truth. It was incredibly embarrassing... but it felt refreshing inside.


    The moment I set foot on the first floor, I heard a faint rumbling sound coming from the second floor. Kamian, with his long legs, had somehow arrived on the first floor before me, and he was already handing me a fever reducer.


    "Keep it. I''ll take it."


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    "You never eat the prescribed amount. And it''s not like consuming less would eliminate the bitter taste either."


    "When are you talking about scarcity? Not anymore."


    He snatched the fever reducer from Kamian''s hand. The man leaned back with a somewhat delinquent posture. It seemed he intended to remain in this position until he finished swallowing all the pills.


    "Pretending to take the medicine, huh?"


    Grumbling, he swallowed the medicine with a gulp. Ugh... A surge of nausea accompanied the bitterness. As I held my nose and flapped my hands, Kamian quickly handed me a cup of water and a candy.


    "Ugh..."


    Suddenly, my cheeks were gripped tightly. Kamian''s hand, being so large, encased even the back of my head. He leisurely bent his waist and met my gaze.


    "I must be imagining things because of you, you bastard."


    "..."


    "What''s the big deal? Should I let you touch me again? If I had known you liked it this much, I would have served you sooner."


    "..."


    Embarrassment struck me belatedly. How can he casually say things like that? If you come at me like this, I won''t be able to speak the truth either. I thought I would stutter and be flustered, but he seems to be even more composed than me.


    Although he clearly knows he''s just joking, I couldn''t find any counterarguments and remained tightly sealed. Inappropriately, a strange feeling overwhelmed me, causing confusion. Is it sexual frustration?


    I chewed my lips painfully to push away the lingering sensation from that day between my legs.


    Then, the crimson irises of Kamian, who had been teasing me, gradually darkened. His stiff mouth seemed terrifyingly unyielding.


    "You..."


    My lewd thoughts were clearly written on my face. Kamian, who wouldn''t miss even the slightest change regarding me, couldn''t possibly overlook it. He''s a devilish creature who can tell whether my body temperature is normal just by looking at my face...


    "Well, what? What?"


    Fortunately, the human heart is not physically manifested. If I say it''s not me, he should let go.


    "Is it that time of the month again?"


    "It''s over."


    I pushed his hand away and went upstairs. I could feel the heavy footsteps following me, but I didn''t turn around. [Thud]. Once I stepped into the room and closed the door, I let out a deep sigh. My neck and shoulders felt stiff and sore, as if they were announcing that I was tense.


    "Liv."


    A low voice could be heard from outside the door. I deliberately put on a gruff tone, filled with a sense of exasperation.


    "Stop calling me."


    "If you feel like the fever is rising again and it''s getting worse, wake me up before it gets too severe. I think it would be better for me to keep an eye on your condition in your room today, but..."


    "..."


    "I feel a bit frightened, as if I''m going to be devoured by you."


    "......"


    Silence followed, accompanied by a cascade of unheard profanities. Who was I kidding with my fanciful thoughts? I never intended to toss Kamian onto the bed like a cheap stuffed bear and explore its intricacies once more.


    "Even so, I am a man of self-restraint..."


    "Even if you''re burning, I won''t wake you up, but I''ll wake you up!"


    Laughter echoed from beyond the door. In my heart, I wanted to fling the door wide open and grasp Kamian''s rosy cheeks firmly. However, contrary to my desires, I couldn''t even raise my hand to the doorknob.


    "Well then, sleep well."


    Kamian bid me farewell with a voice filled with youthful laughter before receding into the distance.


    That day, thanks to Kamian, who had turned my insides upside down, I found myself plagued by peculiar dreams. In one of them, he emerged completely bare, not even wearing a feathered robe, holding a stuffed bear in one hand and gripping something between his legs with the other, asking, ''Choose. What do you desire more?''


    Upon awakening from that dream, I clutched my head and screamed. The realization that what I had chosen in the dream was not the stuffed bear was unbearably shameful.

 Chapter 28 - Admiration

    The entire town buzzed with vitality. The echoing melodies of spirited songs could be heard from every corner, while the enticing aroma of delectable food filled the streets.


    At last, the grandest event of the year, the harvest, had come to an end. And today, the townspeople gathered together to indulge in a carefree celebration of eating, drinking, and revelry, with no worries about their farming chores.


    The festivities took place in front of Holt''s courtyard. As expected, Kamian, the protagonist of this year''s harvest season, took center stage. The townspeople flocked around the table where Kamian sat, brimming with affection and admiration for him, whether they were from the academy or the village.


    "He''s the one, you see. Originally, he was a heartless man, devoid of blood and tears. I created him myself."


    Silently, I shouted within myself, acknowledging my unappreciated efforts.


    "What are you doing, Liv? Quickly snatch the prince''s seat!"


    Sherry grabbed my arm and vigorously shook it. Amidst the unfolding commotion, I remained unmoved like a stagnant pond. It was because this cursed body of mine couldn''t process alcohol. Back when I had my original form, I would drink soju until the break of dawn... Letting it flow all the way down my throat.


    "Why should I?"


    "The adults want to surprise the kids by sitting at their table! So, Liv, you should take the prince''s seat and give it to me!"


    "Sherry, don''t you see me sitting at the kids'' table?"


    Sherry placed my arm on the table and stomped her foot on the ground.


    "Liv can''t even handle alcohol! He''s no help at all!"


    "All of this is my way of helping you. Just wait until you grow older. Kamian is nothing more than a foul-smelling man, neither beyond nor below that..."


    "Don''t insult the prince! Waaah!"


    Sherry wailed at the top of her lungs. However, due to the boisterous atmosphere, only half of the people realized she was crying.


    "Don''t cry. I''m sorry. Kamian won''t drink much either. He''ll have just one beer and come this way. He said he won''t drink anymore until he''s completely intoxicated."


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    At that moment, Tom, who had been darting around the table, caught sight of Sherry''s tears and started chuckling.


    "The cry baby is crying again!"


    "I''m not a crybaby!"


    "Ebeve, he says he''s not a crybaby~"


    "It''s not tears, it''s sweat!"


    "Liar~ Liar~"


    Sherry, puffing up her chest, grabbed a whole walnut pie and slammed it directly onto Tom''s head. A resounding thud accompanied the shattering sound of the firm crust. Tom, still oblivious to what had just happened, blinked his eyes dazedly, only to realize the pain belatedly, and tears welled up in his eyes. I quietly covered my ears, as the sorrowful cries of a child reverberated through the double-pane windows.


    "Oh my goodness! Tom, what on earth happened to you?"


    Holt, who was carrying food, scolded Tom and Sherry as he ushered them. At the mere mention of going to eat fruit candy, the child''s tears stopped abruptly, and excitedly, they leaped away.


    As I held hands and chuckled, watching the two little ones grow distant, a soft laugh escaped my lips. Adorable, indeed.


    I sipped my water, gazing at the broad back of Kamian. Hands from all directions were urging him to drink beer, surrounding Kamian. The townsfolk knew that Kamian was not good with alcohol. Instead, they enjoyed putting Kamian in an awkward position, saying that if he was going to eat, he should drink the alcohol they provided.


    "Just a moment, pay attention to me. Especially, Kamian."


    Already quite drunk, with a flushed face, Kamian put one foot on the table. Then he took something out of his pocket. Despite being intoxicated, his touch was cautious, as if it were something precious.


    "I shall bestow upon Kamian the honor of receiving the first glass of this special wine today."


    Cheers erupted from all corners at the sight of the bottle proudly raised by Kamian. I sincerely thought it was fortunate that Sherry and Tom were not present at this gathering. It was an elongated bottle with a hat instead of a cork stopper. Yes, without a doubt, this wine bottle was fashioned to resemble a male genital organ.


    "...A matter of taste."


    With a brief lick of his lips, Kamian observed Corner pouring wine into the glass.


    Accepting it, Kamian smirked.


    "I will only drink this tonight."


    "Yes, yes! Don''t overexert yourself when your health isn''t good."


    "Let''s create an atmosphere with just this first glass!"


    The townspeople all raised their glasses in unison. At that sight, I also began to prepare to leave. Kamian had said that after just one courtesy drink, he would head straight home. As I tidied up and prepared to stand, the surroundings became noisy. It was a sound different from the boisterous laughter and chatter. It was as if they were startled...


    "Kamian!"


    I turned around at the familiar name. Kamian, who had been perfectly fine just a moment ago, was now collapsed on the table, clutching his forehead.


    The special wine prepared by Corner was a strong drink belonging to a high alcohol content category. It was more than enough to render Kamian unconscious.

 Chapter 29 - Unpleasant

    "Thank you. Return safely,"


    "I''m not sorry. I thought one drink wouldn''t hurt..."


    "It''s Kamian''s weakness for alcohol. Don''t worry too much."


    Corner and Jex supported Kamian, who had fallen unconscious from drinking, and carefully moved him onto the bed. Both of them were drenched in sweat, breathing heavily. Kamian was not an average build.


    Thank goodness Holt''s house is close to ours... Otherwise, we almost left him in the middle of the street.


    I escorted the two of them to the door. I waved my hand towards Corner, who continued to apologize.


    "It''s alright. Oh, Jex! Don''t stay out too late!"


    But as I said those words, it was clear that they would return home with the rising morning sun. It seemed that Corner and Debra, due to the once-a-year party, enjoyed themselves until the next day when they would be bedridden, groaning.


    "I''m not in a position to tell myself to take care of my body."


    I stretched and looked up at the second floor. No matter how much I thought about it, Kamian''s weakness seemed to be alcohol, not my blood. If Luke had succeeded in getting Kamian to drink, not only could he have saved thousands of lives, but he could have also had an ending that said, "Luke lived happily ever after."


    "...Perhaps getting drunk makes one overly honest, exacerbating the situation."


    Whether there could be a worse situation in that world, I couldn''t say for sure.


    I became serious, imagining things that hadn''t even happened yet. Finally, I let out a sigh, as if to release unnecessary worries all at once.


    "Should I change his clothes at least?"


    I stood with my arms crossed in front of Kamian''s firmly closed door, contemplating. However, the answer came quickly without much thought. Impossible. It wasn''t just a matter of inconvenience; it was something I couldn''t do in the first place. I didn''t want to cause a dislocated shoulder while lifting Kamian''s limbs, who had crossed over into the unconscious realm.


    I lightly turned my foot. However, Kamian''s shirt, drenched in alcohol, grazed my fingertips like a jagged nail.


    "...It''s not like I''ll die from sleeping in wet clothes. It''s just a bit unpleasant in the morning."


    I don''t even spill the alcohol, so I don''t understand why I feel so uneasy.


    "Ah, damn it."


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    In the end, I turned my body back and opened Kamian''s door. Kamian was sound asleep, lying face down on the bed. I tapped his back while sitting on the edge of the bed, and his eyelids slowly lifted.


    "Kamian."


    His lethargic pupils, as if on purpose, captured my face with a subtle light. Can a drunkard look so enchanting? I involuntarily furrowed my brow. It was my defense mechanism to prevent myself from being captivated by his face.


    "If you can get up, wash up and sleep."


    The actions seemed somewhat unsteady compared to usual, but there was no staggering fierceness. It seems rather disoriented. I withdrew my arm, which I had extended as a thought to catch them if they fell, with a slight sense of disappointment.


    Kamian, leaning their back and head against the wall, slowly opened their drowsy eyes and gazed at me. Why are they looking at me like that? Their persistent gaze made me uncomfortable.


    "...Why are you getting all worked up, saying I woke you up?"


    A faint crease formed on Kamian''s brow.


    "Worked up?"


    A low voice, flowing subtly through slightly parted lips. It was a voice that suited their hazy, unfocused gaze. Although Kamian was the one intoxicated, I felt myself being drawn into their atmosphere. The ability to captivate a person through the mere flow of air could truly be called mastery. If there were no constraints against falling in love with Kamian, I might have lost my senses and engaged in a passionate kiss.


    In an effort to wash away the sticky residue of a peculiar energy clinging to my skin, I deliberately spoke cheerfully.


    "I came to wake you up because I was thinking about you, but you keep giving me these intimidating looks."


    "I''ve never given you an intimidating look."


    "Just now, those eyes of yours were incredibly impure."


    Kamian blinked their eyes slowly, rubbing them with the back of their hand and pressing on them with their palm. After a while of acting as if they were in agony, the area around their eyes eventually turned a light pink.


    "I was lost in thought."


    Superficially, their tone seemed nonchalant, but there was a sense of injustice seeping through.


    "About what?"


    "What wrong have I done?"


    "Suddenly reflecting on yourself out of the blue."


    "Look, you were frowning."


    "......."


    Their elongated index finger slowly swept through the gap between my eyebrows. Despite our similar body temperatures, the spot where their finger touched felt excessively hot.


    "Did I smell bad while sleeping?"


    "Is that a genuine question?"


    "I see."


    Kamian averted their gaze abruptly. Feelings of embarrassment, confusion, and frustration were piling up within them. My heart involuntarily crumbled in the face of Kamian''s weakened state. Yet, on the other hand, I couldn''t help but feel perplexed.


    I lightly tapped Kamian''s back of the hand that was looking gloomy, as if to console them, and spoke.


    "I never thought it was repulsive. Even your sleeping figure was dazzling to my eyes."


    "......."


    "You need more self-objectification. A lot more."


    "Why?"


    "So as not to engage in baseless and trivial talk."

 Chapter 30 - Drunken

    "I only need to appear beautiful to you."


    "......"


    "What need is there for my subjective opinion?"


    Such madness. To casually utter such nonsensical words.


    Drunk Kamian had shed his sharpness and only the submissive part remained, which made it amusing to tease him. However, due to his ability to shamelessly throw embarrassing remarks like today, there were moments of bewilderment more than once.


    If a beloved lover had said such things, they might have laughed heartily in response. However, considering the circumstances, it was difficult to enjoy this situation.


    Nevertheless, one cannot help but have saliva accumulate in their mouth. [Slurp]. Swallowing the saliva and regaining some semblance of composure, I tilted my head slightly.


    "You, even in your right mind, should know that you spewed such words."


    Why is it always my share to feel embarrassed? Before Kamian''s relentless flirting could drain my energy, I had to leave my seat.


    "Stop babbling and go wash up quickly. I need to wash too."


    Confirming Kamian, who leisurely rose to his feet, I stepped out of the room first.


    "Did I say I would sing after I finished washing?"


    Lying on the bed restlessly, waiting for my turn, my eyelids were gradually becoming heavy. Should I fall asleep like this?


    If Kamian comes out before I fall completely asleep, I''ll go wash up. Otherwise, it can''t be helped. I decided to leave everything to fate.


    Just as my mind was about to cross the threshold of unconsciousness, I heard a knock.


    "Ah..."


    Unintentionally, a sigh escaped my lips. In reality, it was just an excuse to say it was fate. I had simply wanted to fall asleep. After an irritated sigh, I mustered the strength to move my heavy body and stepped out of the room.


    As soon as I opened the door, I saw Kamian''s sturdy chest. It was too bothersome to raise my head, so I passed by without lifting it and headed towards the bathroom.


    Ensure your favorite authors get the support they deserve. Read this novel on Royal Road.


    As I turned on the water, my drowsiness was slightly alleviated, but the fatigue in my body increased. When did I last dry my hair and sleep? I should have just left my hair undried. It was too late to regret now. After placing a dry towel on my head, I hurriedly walked back to the room with occasional strides.


    "Huh?"


    Amidst the faintly trickling moonlight, a round figure encroached upon the bed. Why is it here instead of in its own room?


    I removed the towel that was wrapped around my head and walked towards the edge of the bed.


    "It''s cramped. Go to your room and sleep."


    With a swift motion of lifting my feet, I pushed the intruder away, and Kamian stretched his head out from under the blanket. Despite hearing my admonition, he remained steadfast.


    "My bed is wet."


    "Ah."


    I recalled Kamian lying on the bed with his clothes soaked in alcohol. Such a variety of situations. That''s why you shouldn''t show kindness to a drunkard.


    "Then sleep on the floor."


    Instead of getting up, Kamian lifted the blanket that was covering him. It was an invitation to enter his embrace. I chuckled and responded.


    "Oh, should I wipe my wet hair all over you then?"


    Even in the face of my threat, Kamian showed no sign of concern and even stuck out his tongue. Wrestling with a drunken person, or rather a drunken demon, is a losing battle. Alcohol dominates the rationality of a demon, rendering logic ineffective.


    "Fine."


    I should sleep on the couch then. After giving him a stern look, I sat down on a chair. As I wrung out the dampness from my hair with a towel, Kamian, who seemed determined not to move an inch from the bed, suddenly got up.


    Extending his long legs, he swiftly approached me, snatching the towel from my hand. I looked at my empty hand in puzzlement, then raised my head...


    "Ah...!"


    The towel wrapped around my entire head and wildly thrashed about. It wasn''t painful, but it was enough to startle me. The towel that obscured my vision was quickly removed, and his large hand gently gathered up the loose strands of hair cascading over my face.


    "What are you doing?"


    Kamian emerged from his kneeling position, eye-level with me.


    "I don''t know."


    What a peculiar statement. Who would understand your actions if not yourself? As I furrowed my brow slightly, Kamian narrowed his gaze, mirroring my expression, and added:


    "I find it hard to leave you alone when I see you."


    "What?"


    "I want to touch you, play around with you, and engage in conversation."


    "...."


    It''s the behaviour of an inexperienced child in love. When I used both hands to stretch Kamian''s narrowed brow, he began to rub his face against my hand.


    "That way, you would pay attention to me."