《Shadows of Lust and Wrath》


 Shadows of Lust - A New Mission

    Frozen. That was the only word that could describe it. The room was filled with a chilled air that sent goosebumps upon every inch of Blaine¡¯s skin. They could see their frozen breath escape their lips in a quiet gasp. Ice was beginning to christen their cheeks as their tears fell and began to frost over. Though not literally frozen, Blaine¡¯s legs could not move. They would not move. Every step closer made the scene more and more real.


    A swirling mass of black, with bits of human skin showing in the cracks. It would almost be unrecognizable if not for the muffled cries of a once innocent boy. As the darkness began to separate from the person, two blinding lights pulled away from the face and stared directly into Blaine¡¯s eyes. Caressing the small head of their brother, a bright smile creeped its way onto the shadow¡¯s face.


    Expired. The old can flung to the wall with a loud thud. Broken. The already defunct flashlight crashed and had its lens shattered on the ground. Useless. This thought was less aimed towards an item, but more towards the person. Blaine sat in the abandoned convenience store surrounded by nothing but junk. Their journey for supplies had proven to be an unsuccessful one, but they couldn¡¯t afford to give up. Not when they had worked so hard. Not when they had someone waiting for them.


    After leaving the third building once again empty-handed, they were beginning to run out of options. Their flashlight and their body were running on empty; they were being reckless. A sudden shuffling in a nearby alleyway seemed to spring their senses back into action. Blaine crouched into a dark corner of the street and kept their eyes locked on the alley. A light began to fade into existence and grow in size and strength, coming to a head at an industrial sized flashlight held by a gruff looking man in black sweatpants and a dark grey tank top. Recognizing another human was one thing, recognizing his intentions was another.


    After observing the man scrounging through several trash cans, Blaine was becoming less suspicious of the individual. Their stomach, however, decided to speed up the process and make their presence aware to him. Realizing that continuing to hide was useless, Blaine revealed themself and cautiously approached.


    ¡°That bad, huh?¡± He asked, pulling a granola bar out from a seemingly endlessly deep pocket and tossing it towards Blaine. They considered saving it, but could not risk passing out in the middle of the night. ¡°I haven¡¯t seen you around, you got a name?¡±


    ¡°Blaine.¡± They said after a few moments of hesitation. ¡°You?¡±


    ¡°Dante. You aren¡¯t from the village, are you? I recognize a struggling loner when I see one.¡± There was a slight mixture of humor and venom in the last sentence. Blaine was trying not to take offense to it.


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    ¡°No. I live alone¡± It was almost hard for Dante to hear over the continued rumbles of Blaine¡¯s stomach.


    ¡°And how well is that working for you?¡± His hand seemed to gesture towards Blaine¡¯s entire being to make a point. ¡°Kid, you¡¯d better come back with me. We can get you cleaned up and fill your belly before the sun rises.¡±


    ¡°No.¡± A million reasons swirled around in Blaine¡¯s head as to why that would not work, but none escaped their lips. ¡°Thank you for the food, but I should get going.¡±


    ¡°Hold on. I can¡¯t let you leave like this; I don¡¯t want your blood on my hands. Come back with me and we can at least get you some supplies.¡±


    ¡°And what is in it for you? There aren¡¯t exactly a lot of charities still left.¡±


    ¡°We can discuss the terms on the way. Though it doesn¡¯t look like you have many other options.¡± Dante turned and began to walk, going slow enough to give Blaine time to think things through. As much as they did not want to take the risk, they did not have another choice. They picked up their feet and began to match his slowly increasing pace.


    ¡°What¡¯s the deal?¡± Blaine prayed it would be easy, but had a feeling that Dante was in a similar situation given his earlier dumpster diving.


    ¡°I live in a community of survivors. Our camp is discreet. Safe. And we intend to keep it that way.¡± A heavy sigh escaped his throat. ¡°But we have had some issues. A couple run ins with some shadows.¡± Blaine was silent, beginning to feel the mix of sweat and perspiration on their face behind their cloth mask. ¡°The women are still alive, but many of the men have gotten sick.¡± It was a story heard too many times before.


    ¡°Where do I come in?¡± They had a feeling they already knew, but was silently hoping the answer would surprise them.


    ¡°We believe we tracked down a group of the bastards in one of the abandoned university buildings. With people either sick or caring for those who are, we need someone to get rid of the little infestation.¡± His eyes peered down at Blaine¡¯s, who was starting to feel regret creeping into their desperation. ¡°Are you in?¡±


    ¡°A one-person mission against a group of shadows is a near death sentence.¡± They started to protest, but remembered why they left in the first place. ¡°Surely I get a bit more than a mere handful of supplies?¡±


    ¡°We have farms, doctors, a clean water supply, and an overall helpful community. You don¡¯t seem interested in settling down, but do this for us and you¡¯re welcome any time for a snack, drink, or whatever you can fit in a bag and carry home.¡± It was beginning to sound too good to be true, until the two of them approached a giant stadium. Its lights were illuminated and shining into the center, which could not be seen over the walls that seemed to reach halfway up the sky. Blaine imagined this is where people came to watch some sort of sports game, but they had never gotten the chance to experience it before the shadows came. Dante turned to Blaine with a smile and gestured towards a locked entrance. ¡°Do we have a deal?¡±


    There was a stark contrast between the darkness of the night and the brightness of the stadium lights. It reminded Blaine of hiding under their covers with a pen light trying to read books without getting caught. They had read stories about a brave hero that saves the day and rescues the damsel in distress. This story was not so cut and dry. There was no clear hero, though there were many clear villains. There was someone in distress, but the rescue mission was not that simple. There was a day that needed saving, that much was true, but there were so many days that had yet to be saved before. How could they be so sure that they would be the hero? Maybe there wasn¡¯t a hero at all. Maybe there was just a person who was desperate to survive.


    They reached into their pocket and pulled out a small pack of glow-sticks, then met eyes with Dante. ¡°We have a deal.¡±

 Shadows of Lust - The Doctor is In

    Walking into the village, Blaine was met with destruction and disrepair. Unfortunately, the prospect of a large settlement of people living together and surviving in this new world had filled their mind with expectations that were far from met. They had to consciously remind themself that this was a community that had just been ravaged by monsters, on top of the fact that they were currently in a post-apocalyptic lifestyle. This more realistic description matched the landscape more accurately. Dante likely sensed Blaine¡¯s slight disappointment, or maybe even the mask could not make their face unreadable.


    ¡°It¡¯s not usually like this.¡± He reassured, ¡°Before the attack it was actually a pretty welcoming place.¡± Dante was saying this both to comfort Blaine and himself. Though it was hard to believe even his own words whilst stepping over rubble and debris. There were a few puddles of the inky goo that made up the shadows¡¯ forms. It sat like bits of freshly paved roads, covering up the cracks and imperfections of the damage that the monsters had made. ¡°We are going to stop by and talk to Ishmael. He is our group doctor. And our mayor. And a lot of things to be honest.¡±


    There was a strange feeling going through Blaine as they walked through this decimated college campus. It was a bittersweet nostalgia for a life never lived. Before the shadows had first made their appearance, Blaine was not quite old enough to be looking for colleges. It was more of an afterthought in their mind, a destination on the horizon but not quite in sight. They did not know where they would want to go, but they knew that they wanted to go far from home. Somewhere they could start a new life, where no one knew who they were or even their name. Though it was always easier to imagine it as a fantasy than to make plans. There were still people they cared about that they could not bring themself to leave.


    Though Blaine had never been to college, or even visited a campus, the ideas they got from watching TV and movies had left a good impression. College was this place of community where you could be yourself and still be accepted, and there were bound to be others just like you. It was a place of self-discovery, blossoming friendships, and even the occasional bout of drama. Blaine wanted to experience it all, but now the chances of that were slim to none. This version of college was bleak and left much to be desired.


    It was easy to tell when they got close to the doctor¡¯s office. There was a line of people that seemed to span forever, with some who had clearly been waiting for a couple hours. There were many men who had greasy hair and were shaking from chills, their eyes sunken and tired. There were also women who cradled distended bellies, struggling to remain standing as the bundles of sorrow growing inside them sapped their energy and strength. Blaine was not entirely sure of the details, but the severity of the situation was not lost on them.


    Dante and Blaine stepped past the line of future patients to speak to the community¡¯s leader immediately; they were not quite expected in the office, but they were hoped for. Dante knocked on the door and paused until there was a verbal response that the two were allowed in. Stepping inside, Blaine saw Ishmael and realized that all his different titles came with their own set of bags for his eyes. His skin, while dark, still managed to look pale and wrinkled. His eyes were dark and heavy, not from illness but from sheer stress and fatigue. Black hair with grey streaks fell to his shoulders and framed his face, which held up a pair of chipped and smudged glasses. The doctor was examining a young woman with a rather large belly that was darker than the rest of her pale body, to the point where it was visible in the thin blue medical gown she was wearing.


    ¡°Ishmael, be honest. How bad is it?¡± The woman asked, her voice trembling with fear.


    ¡°Well, Dawn, the incubation time is usually fairly short anyways, but yours seems to be even shorter due to your age and overall good health. This one is rather large, I would not be surprised if you went into labor in the next 3 days.¡± Ishmael reported in a somber tone. ¡°I am hoping it does not get much bigger in that time, but definitely come back if your symptoms get worse.¡±


    ¡°This thing is almost a third of my size, am I even going to survive the delivery?¡± Dawn had attempted and failed to choke back tears while speaking.


    ¡°As far as I can tell, these things don¡¯t cause as painful of a delivery as a normal baby. Though there will certainly be discomfort and pain, I am quite confident you will be fine.¡± Though it was clear to Blaine from his expression that Ishmael was not a hundred percent sure of his words, he did not seem to be lying to spare Dawn of a harsh truth. ¡°Go ahead and get changed, I need to speak with these guests.¡±


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    Dawn nodded, not completely relieved, and grabbed her clothes from a chair while heading towards a door leading to a bathroom containing another exit. Ishmael turned towards Dante with alleviation, then his eyes moved towards Blaine and seemed to fill with more disappointment.


    ¡°I asked you to bring me a person willing to help, and you stand before me now with a child? Are you sure this kid has even seen a shadow before?¡± Ishmael did not hide his condescension from Blaine at all, yet Blaine did not feel as though they were being ignored.


    ¡°This is Blaine. They want to help in exchange for some supplies. I know they¡¯re a little young, but I have confidence in them.¡± Dante seemed to be trying to convince everyone in the room, including himself. Ishmael remained unconvinced but was low on options, he sighed and came closer to Blaine.


    ¡°Blaine, do you honestly think you can kill a shadow?¡± The doctor asked with slight desperation.


    ¡°I already have before.¡± Blaine replied, their eyes not quite meeting Ishmael¡¯s face and rather staring vacantly through him. Ishmael did not ask for more details, he knew Blaine was not lying.


    ¡°You don¡¯t have to tell me if you don¡¯t want to reveal your assigned sex at birth, but are you fully aware what would happen to you if one of those things overpowered you?¡± He took note of Blaine¡¯s curly brown hair that reached their shoulders, along with the black cloth mask that covered their nose and mouth. Blaine¡¯s outfit was loose enough to be breathable but not quite tight enough to accentuate any curves or expose the size of their chest. Ishmael remained curious from a medical standpoint, but also remained respectful.


    ¡°I am well aware.¡± Blaine answered, refusing to elaborate any further. Ishmael did not pry any further. ¡°Dante said something about a group of shadows for me to get rid of, where can I find them?¡±


    ¡°Well, I am sure you have noticed the state of our village, we were attacked by some shadows a couple days ago. We fought them off the best we could, but they retreated before we could finish them off. Most of our men are infected and our women are now incubating little monsters.¡± Ishmael turned to a shelf with some pamphlets and pulled out a map of the university. ¡°We did not see where they went but some people have reported strange sounds coming from the old science laboratory. That seems to be our only lead.¡± Blaine looked over the map and was a bit impressed by the size of the campus, though it seemed that not all of it was being used by the community. The health center was where Ishmael was caring for the sick, while the dorms were where most people were living. There was also a cafeteria that was being used, and a gym that had been repurposed as training grounds.


    ¡°What kind of weapons do you have?¡± Blaine asked curiously, knowing that the glow sticks in their pocket might not be enough.


    ¡°We don¡¯t have much, but we can spare a flashlight if you need one.¡± He looked a bit shameful that he was willing to send someone with so little supplies. Blaine eyed something sitting on Ishmael¡¯s desk.


    ¡°What about that?¡± They pointed at a small laser pointer that Ishmael sometimes used to point out specific details on his medical charts hanging on the walls. He seemed a bit surprised by the notion that Blaine wanted something so small to defend themself but allowed them to pocket it. They showed off the pack of glow sticks that rested safely in their pocket, showing they did not come empty handed. Dante handed them a flashlight and Blaine sighed, feeling prepared despite their overall lack of preparation. ¡°I think I¡¯m ready.¡±


    Ishmael nodded and spoke something softly to himself in what seemed to be another language. Though they couldn¡¯t understand the words, Dante and Blaine both recognized it as a kind of prayer. He showed the two to the door and they could hear him calling in his next patient as they walked out. Dante looked at the map given to Blaine and marked what he believed to be the quickest and saftest path to the lab. He looked down at Blaine and sighed.


    ¡°Look kid, I know we are both desperate, but there is still no shame in backing out.¡± Seeing Blaine shake their head made Dante feel both relieved that someone was helping the community but also fearful that the gravity of the mission had yet to fall onto them completely. Dante saw a lot of himself in Blaine, which both comforted and scared him. Without really thinking, he reached down and embraced Blaine in an attempt to comfort the both of them. Within less than a second after his hands touched Blaine¡¯s back, a fist flew into Dante¡¯s nose, and he stumbled to the ground.


    Blaine stood speechless, their eyes showing a mixture of surprise, fear, guilt, and a bit in between. Dante could see tears in the corner of Blaine¡¯s eyes, which they desperately attempted to blink away and hide with a stern expression. The force of the impact has caused Blaine¡¯s long sleeves to roll up their arms, which they quickly fixed. Not quite quick enough for Dante to avoid seeing deep purple scars around Blaine¡¯s wrists and up and down their arms. He realized his mistake in assuming the gesture would be seen as comforting. Dante wiped a bead of blood that came from his nose and smiled up at Blaine.


    ¡°Maybe you¡¯re tougher than you look, sorry for treating you like a child.¡± Dante got up from his knees and Blaine offered a hand. ¡°Now go out there and kick some ass.¡±

 Shadows of Lust - The Lab Rat

    The walls of the science building were lined with various diagrams, graphs, and charts of things that Blaine vaguely recognized as parts of the body. It was beginning to dawn upon them that there was a lot about science that they missed out learning on due to not being able to finish their education. There were basic things that Blaine knew, like the difference between plant and animal cells, and the difference between cells and viruses. They knew about the biological differences between men and women, and what it meant to be something other than the two.


    It was the things that Blaine knew about science that made them more confused about the existence of these living shadow monsters. Their bodies seemed to be some kind of mixture of solid, liquid, and gas depending solely on what form suited their needs most. Their bodies seemed far too cold to be able to sustain any kind of life, but that did not stop them from moving at incredible speeds. Intellectually, they seemed to be at equal standings to humans. Biologically, however, they were much more advanced in many ways. Blaine had never observed any organs, though admittedly they had only ever been in close contact with one before. There was not much left of that one to investigate.


    As Blaine walked through the empty halls of the building, they placed their hand on each door they came across. They had never actively tracked shadows before but figured that if there were multiple of them in one room, they would be able to feel the chilled air through the door. It was not a foolproof plan, but it was more thought out than the scrambled mess of ideas about what to do when they actually found the creatures.


    One idea was to turn on the generators and have the lights smoke them out, but there was no way to know where they would come from, and it was impossible for Blaine to guard every exit single-handedly. Another idea was to activate the fire alarm somewhere in the building to attract them, though inviting the shadows to swarm Blaine seemed like a bad idea when they did not know exactly how many they were up against. Blaine preferred having the element of surprise on their side.


    Blaine had just reached the third floor of the building, and a mix of anticipation and anxiety was eating away at them. As they pulled their hand away from the door of room 338, they recoiled slightly. They had not even registered the frost on the door¡¯s window until that moment. The blind bravery that Blaine had been running on was slowly starting to melt into a deep fear. They ducked their body under the window while leaving their head upwards so that they could peer through the frosted glass. Blaine felt their stomach drop at the realization of just how much danger they were in. A group of eight shadows were gathered around a table, each looking down and taking turns poking and prodding at something just out of view. It was not clear whether they were using tools or just their own bodies.


    Blaine was hesitant to enter, unsure if they could truly face so many of the monsters at once. That hesitation dissipated instantly when they saw the human arm drape down from the table the shadows surrounded. Without any second of thought or planning, they kicked the door open and were met with a dozen piercing gazes aimed solely at them. Blaine held their flashlight as steady as they were physically able and aimed it directly into the face of the shadow closest to them. It brought them a strange satisfaction to see its body melt from the top down like a black candle.


    There was a moment of stagnation from the shadows as they seemed to each process the death of one of their own, and even Blaine was not immune to the second of shock and awe. The moment ended with one of the shadows just out of the flashlight¡¯s range starting to dart for the door to a neighboring room. In an instant, Blaine pulled out the laser pointer and it provided them with much needed range. The beam of light sliced through the shadow¡¯s form like a hot knife through butter. The top half of the creature fell to the floor and Blaine took no time to rush by its side and melt it with the flashlight, leaving the bottom half a lifeless lump on the ground.


    An icy hand fell onto Blaine¡¯s shoulder and instinct kicked in. In one swift motion, they ripped a green glowstick from their pocket, cracked it down the middle, then held it firmly in their fist while plunging it into the face of the shadow behind their back. The black sludge slid down Blaine¡¯s hand and they felt it soak their shoulder as well. This sparked a new idea in their head, starting with cracking a pink glowstick and cracking the initial one again since the chill of the shadow was enough to freeze the liquid. They dug their nails into the flimsy plastic casing that held the liquid inside until it began to flow in their hands. Blaine cupped as much of the glowing liquid as they could and tossed it towards the two shadows on their left and right sides. Just as Blaine had hoped, the liquid acted like acid and took globs of their forms away as it dribbled down their bodies. Blaine had to crack two more glowsticks to get enough liquid to finish the two shadows off.


    Two more of the shadows attempted to flee out of the doorway Blaine had entered through, but their quick movement was caught in Blaine¡¯s peripheral vision. They rushed towards the two shadows with one glowstick left in one hand and a rainbow of the glowing juice in the other. Blaine grabbed one of the two with their glowing hand while the other hand moved in a stabbing motion into the body of the other shadow. The first shadow was experiencing a burning pressure in what looked like a neck, similar to being choked. The second shadow was slowly being drained of its life as their form was melting out of the holes that were being made in their body. After a couple minutes of repeated clawing and stabbing, there were two large piles of goo sitting where the two shadows once struggled for life.


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    Blaine knew there was one remaining but was slightly concerned that there was no surprise attacks made while they were dealing with the other seven. If the last shadow had snuck out of the room, there would be no telling where it could have gone. As they stood up to begin searching, their eyes fell upon the table that the shadows had been surrounding and Blaine remembered what they had been fighting for. An unconscious man laid face up on the table. His eyes were dark and sunken despite clearly having been sleeping for a while, his hair looked like it had once been blonde but now was dark and damp with grease. There were splotches of shadow coating parts of his skin, it was unclear whether they came from outside or inside of his body. Most surprising seemed to be the fact he adorned a pair of navy-blue boxers and a pale tank top which was also painted in splotches of black. Blaine had honestly been expecting to see someone wearing nothing more than the outfit they were born in.


    Half of Blaine wanted to help this man, but the other half knew there was still an imminent danger present. Almost right as their contemplation settled on finding the rogue shadow, the hairs on the back of Blaine¡¯s neck began to involuntarily stand on end. A quick turn of the head revealed the last monster attempting to sneak behind Blaine on a mission for the door. Blaine dropped the used glowstick and wiped the sticky non-glowing goo on their sweatshirt, then grabbed the flashlight from their pocket. In that time, the remaining shadow slipped past Blaine and beelined for the door. Predicting the shadow¡¯s desired trajectory, Blaine shined the light at the door right before the shadow could make its escape. Blaine reached into their pocket for another glowstick only to find it was empty, the number of broken ones on the floor seemed to be the same as the amount they had in their pack to begin with. They attempted to dual wield both the flashlight and the laser pointer, but their thumb slipped on the button for the pointer, and it fell from their hand. A stray beam of light shot from the laser pointer as it slipped and ended up hitting the shadow¡¯s head on the white glowing orb that most resembled an eye. Much to Blaine¡¯s shock, the creature let out a painful wail and dropped to the floor clutching its face in pain.


    After seeing all of the others die so easily without much of a struggle, seeing the pain they had caused this one seemed to cause the gravity of the situation to hit Blaine like a truck. The gravity got heavier as Blaine slowly reached for the laser pointer only to see the shadow reveal its face again. The orb that had been hit was leaking ooze in a manner that resembled someone crying, which seemed to fit perfectly with the expression of fear that covered its ghoulish face. Blaine thought about the man laying on the table and tried to muster up the strength to finish the job, but their mind was still clouded with doubt. There were eight of them alone with that man for who knows how long, and he was still alive, even wearing clothes. If they wanted to do something worse, why had they not done it already?


    All of that bravery that had once been pumping Blaine¡¯s body full of adrenaline was slipping, leaving them a shaking mess trying desperately to hide their fear. In an act that was a mixture of stupidity, mercy, and fear, Blaine took a deep breath and clicked the flashlight facing the door off. Their breath remained stuck in their throat as they watched the shadow hesitate, unsure if this was a trick. Blaine was not sure either. The shadow crawled slowly at first, then slipped through the door in an instant. As the creature left Blaine¡¯s sight, the air finally escaped their lungs, and their breathing began to steady. The realization of what had just happened slowly began to sink in, and Blaine was desperately trying to justify their action.


    Now it can go tell the others to stay away. They thought. Now they will all know not to come back. It was a desperate attempt to convince themself that they did the right thing. Blaine shook their head to quiet their racing thoughts and focused on the task at hand. Their initial task of finding and eliminating the shadows had been (mostly) successful, but they had a new mission now. The person on the table was in desperate need of medical attention.


    Blaine placed a palm on the man¡¯s chest and much to their relief felt a slow and steady beat. They were not sure the best way to wake the man up, so they pulled a thick piece of skin from under his neck and pinched hard with a sharp twist. His face flinched slightly and eyes blinked open, not as extreme of a reaction as Blaine expected but at least he was awake. After a few seconds of silence, Blaine realized it was their turn to speak since they were the one to wake the man.


    ¡°Sorry about that, my name is Blaine.¡± They spoke awkwardly.


    ¡°Peter.¡± The man said between coughs and jagged breaths. Peter slowly attempted to sit himself up, but after losing balance Blaine was quick to extend a hand to help.


    ¡°Do you know where you are or how you got here?¡± Blaine questioned, gesturing at Peter¡¯s current condition. He clutched his head as though recalling the events was a painful experience.


    ¡°I remember hearing about a village nearby and coming to ask for supplies.¡± His eyes closed as he thought more intently. ¡°I remember running into a group of shadows. They asked for the location of the village, but I refused to tell them. They said they would force it out of me.¡± Peter¡¯s slightly teary eyes opened and stared into the distance. ¡°I don¡¯t remember much after that.¡±


    ¡°I¡¯m sorry.¡± It was all Blaine could choke out of their gritted teeth. They took a deep breath to attempt to quell the rage that Peter¡¯s story stirred. The choice to spare the shadow sat in the back of their mind and festered into guilt at what it could do with the life that Blaine had allowed it to keep. There was no time for regrets, they had to focus on the now. ¡°You¡¯re in one of the unused buildings of the village. Come on, let¡¯s get you to the doctor while you still have the strength.¡±


    Peter nodded in agreement; he seemed just as aware of his deteriorating health as Blaine was. Blaine helped Peter to his feet and slung his arm around their shoulders and neck. Peter walked slowly while resting some of his weight on Blaine. The two of them trudged to the door to make their way to the health center. Blaine looked back while they paused in the doorway for a moment. Their new additions to the lab room were now still puddles of goo scattered around. All but one spot by the door that was unsettlingly clean. Blaine was not religious, but in that moment, they prayed that shadow would stay far away from them.

 Shadows of Lust - Midnight Shopping Spree

    It was hard to say what surprised Dante more: seeing Blaine return unharmed or seeing them come with one more human. He had been actively patrolling the area to make sure there were no shadows left from the attack. The camp was already in bad shape, to have a stray shadow making a midnight ambush would be something no one in the camp had the strength to deal with right now. When Dante saw the one familiar and one unfamiliar faces approaching him, he recognized instantly that one of them needed an immediate trip to Ishmael.


    ¡°God, what happened to him?¡± Dante asked, pulling the man¡¯s arm from Blaine¡¯s shoulder and placing it on his own.


    ¡°That group of shadows happened to him. Name¡¯s Peter¡± Blaine wanted to speed through the introductions given the fact that Peter¡¯s consciousness was slipping.


    ¡°What happened to the shadows?¡± Dante asked hesitantly.


    ¡°I happened to them.¡± Blaine said with a bit of pride, trying to mask their underlying fears and exhaustion. They were relieved that Dante took Peter off their hands, he was becoming increasingly harder to carry. Dante gave an impressed nod, secretly examining Blaine for any signs of injury.


    ¡°Let¡¯s get the both of you to Ishmael, hopefully he can help.¡± Dante led the two tired survivors to the health center and returned to his post just in case.


    Much like the first time Blaine had seen Ishmael, he looked with surprise, relief, and disappointment in that order. He quickly waved for Peter to be placed on his empty examination table. After listening to Peter¡¯s chest, taking his temperature, and performing a couple other examinations, he let out an exasperated sigh.


    ¡°Yup, he has Shadow Syndrome.¡± He sat the now unconscious Peter up on the table. ¡°And it¡¯s worse than most of the people here, he must have been attacked a while ago.¡± Ishmael started moving Peter into the chair that sat next to where Blaine was sitting. He then waved a hand in Blaine¡¯s direction. ¡°Okay, you next.¡±


    ¡°What?¡± Blaine asked, confused.


    ¡°You just took on all of those shadows and on top of it have been travelling with someone infected, you¡¯re getting examined too.¡± Ishmael commanded; Blaine could see now why he was the village leader.


    ¡°I¡¯m fine, I promise.¡± Blaine tried to argue but Ishmael would not take no for an answer. He began by also listening to Blaine¡¯s chest.


    ¡°Okay, heart rate and breathing are normal. You don¡¯t have to undress if you¡¯re not comfortable, but you will need to pull down your mask.¡± Ishmael instructed and Blaine followed the instructions. ¡°Temperature also normal.¡± He pulled out a pen light and shined it in front of Blaine¡¯s face. ¡°Follow the light with your eyes only. Good. Now tell me, how was the fight? Did any of them hurt you?¡± Blaine recounted everything that happened while Ishmael examined their fingernails and hair for any signs of shadowy remains. Ishmael sighed again, this time with relief. ¡°I will admit I was worried about you, but that is extremely impressive. You took on 8 shadows and came out of it unscathed.¡±


    ¡°Yeah, I guess I did.¡± Blaine smiled, hoping Ishmael could not tell they had lied about killing all of them. ¡°Now, about those supplies.¡±


    ¡°I am a man of my word.¡± Ishmael had Blaine hand him the map from earlier and circled a cafeteria nearby. ¡°That¡¯s our supply building. Go in and take all you can carry. I¡¯ll let them know to expect you.¡± Blaine nodded and started towards the door, then looked back at Peter.


    ¡°What will happen to him?¡± They asked with concern in their voice. Ishmael sighed and looked the unconscious man up and down.


    ¡°We will do what we can, that¡¯s all we can do.¡± Ishmael¡¯s tone was somber yet calm, trying to provide Blaine with some level of comfort while also not wanting to downplay the severity of the situation. After reading the room, Blaine realized it was time to leave.


    There was an audible crashing sound in the living room. It seemed that the man¡¯s patience had run as empty as his beer. Blaine was exhausted, desperate for sleep. They had to stay awake despite their tired eyes, they knew what might happen if they nodded off before their dad. The sound of the television turning off was Blaine¡¯s cue to step out, it was time to intervene. The drunken man was beginning to stumble towards the hallway Blaine was now standing in.


    ¡°Where¡¯s my little handsome man?¡± His words slurred as droplets of alcohol flew from his mouth.


    ¡°He¡¯s asleep. He has school in the morning.¡± Blaine responded sternly.


    ¡°Asleep? He forgot to give daddy a goodnight kiss.¡± He began to step into the hallway but was quickly blocked by Blaine¡¯s palm.


    ¡°You shouldn¡¯t do that. You¡¯re drunk.¡± Their face was serious in order to hide the fear running down their spine and the vomit rising up their throat.


    ¡°I don¡¯t give a damn! I want that boy now!¡± Despite being tired himself, his anger was quickly rising and filling him with energy. Blaine sighed, knowing that there was only one way out of this.


    ¡°I¡¯m ready for bed.¡± Blaine spoke softly, the words fighting to stay in their mouth.


    ¡°Then let¡¯s get your ass in bed!¡± He excitedly gripped Blaine by the wrist and began dragging them to their room, landing the two of them in Blaine¡¯s bed.


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    As the smell of the man¡¯s intoxication filled the air, Blaine closed their eyes and imagined their brother fast asleep. He was safe in bed, safe in his own room, safe from this. As Blaine struggled to breathe through the barrage of sweat and beer-stained clothes, they swore he would never have to feel this. He would never have to feel this pain.


    ¡°Blaine¡­¡± A muffled cry broke through. Their father was gone, their room was empty.


    Did I fall asleep? They wondered in panic as they ran towards their brother¡¯s room. The scene they saw was impossible, that much was true. After all, they had lost track of their father when the shadows came. That did not stop Blaine from believing the fabrication for a second too long. The false image of their father with that same shadow in their brother¡¯s room, each having their way with him, while all Blaine could do was let out a silent scream as their brother¡¯s voice slipped a single word from his lips.


    ¡°Why?¡±


    The deathly still air broke as Blaine¡¯s body shot up, making its way in and out of their lungs. Deep yet hushed gasps broke free from their chest as the nightmare slowly faded away, the details still lingering in their mind. The surroundings were starting to familiarize Blaine with reality once again, assuring them that what they saw was not real, no matter how it felt. They couldn¡¯t help but run their fingers up and down their arms, embracing them and feeling all of the bumps and ridges. This feeling filled them with comfort, they knew exactly what to expect with each and every inch moved. They could hear the broken clock down the hall that was still ticking despite being stuck at 1:13, their breaths started to sync with every other tick, then every third, until they seemed to be mostly calmed down.


    A familiar black mask sat at their bedside; it lay flat yet crumpled from being thrown down. They picked it up and examined its features. The cloth was once dark but had faded in some spots from constant perspiration and general wear and tear. The once white triangles that were arranged in a circular pattern were stained here and there with brown, green, grey, and a few colors in between. A deep sigh escaped their lips as they pressed a hand up to their forehead. It was still warm; the normal type of warm that let a person know they were alive, but not so warm as to cause concern. Despite this there were still beads of sweat dripping down their neck, mostly cold beads from being forced awake.


    Blaine fell backwards onto the pillow in a vain attempt to will themself back to sleep. Every time their eyes filled with darkness, it was quickly filled by the mental images generated by a combination of their own fears, insecurities, and memories they had hoped would not resurface. After a few minutes of tossing and turning, they realized that sleep was no longer an option. They stood up and adorned their mask as they began pacing the floor. Each step seemed to weigh down on their mind, as though the floor was gripping their feet and sinking them further and further into the depths of their thoughts. The room, although the wallpaper was torn and faded from both age as well as fits of anger and desperate attempts to conceal memories, was still recognizable to Blaine. Memories of the times they wished to be as alone in it as they were now. Times when the fear they felt was different, the threats more imminent, yet now so far away. They had to leave. They had to escape these thoughts.


    Picture frames that had been shattered still hung on the walls in the hallway. Certain faces had been torn out, leaving only the same two people that were visible in the few that still had faces. They stopped for a moment in the hallway and stared at a door that stood cracked open, a soft electrical hum could be heard coming from it. Their hand pressed up against it to hold it steady as they held their breath and listened. A soft, raspy breathing sound was barely audible under the electrical humming. That was all Blaine needed to hear before they continued walking. The hall was slightly illuminated by the light of the moon and the stars, but this light was enough for Blaine to navigate through. They pressed their back against the wall and stared out the window. The outside world seemed to tempt them, with the fresh air, cool breeze, and the lack of reminders of the past. It also swayed them away with its promises of dangers, both known and unknown. Going out this late seemed like a death sentence, but the 6 shadows¡¯ deaths one at a time in replayed in their mind and filled them with assurance. They grabbed a flashlight and the laser pointer from the table in the living room and officially made up their mind, taking one more look at the place before slipping out the front door.


    The air was just as crisp and cool as they had hoped it would be. Their unkempt hair blew around wildly in the breeze and they had to push it out of their eyes every now and again. They mentally reminded themself they would need to cut it soon, hair in the eyes was a distraction they could not afford if their life was at risk. As they wandered through the streets of what was once a nearby town, they wondered if there would still be some non-essential things on the shelves. Staring at their own tattered clothes, they figured they could go for something that was more in one piece.


    One of the stores had some mannequins standing in the broken window displays. Ignoring their creepy nature of standing unbroken in the middle of destruction while illuminated by the moonlight, Blaine decided to enter the building. They took care to step over the broken glass without getting any in their worn shoes. Any spare shard would likely go right through the soles and pierce their feet. Some of the hangers were surprisingly not empty, so Blaine began their shopping spree. The color selection was slimmer than Blaine had hoped, as it seemed other people had already cleared the darker clothes. All that remained was bright pinks, yellows, and other colors that would have fit perfectly in a summer day before everything changed.


    Although the colors did not match their wants, Blaine picked out a couple shirts and pants that were less ripped and actually fit them properly. They decided that some black spray-paint would help fix the color issue. They went to grab a bag to put their goodies in when a voice made their heart stop.


    ¡°Look here, someone is playing a bit of dress-up.¡± The voice had a slight distortion mixed with hush whispery sounds. Blaine instantly knew before turning what they would see. Four dark figures stood at the store¡¯s entrance, glowing white eyes landing directly on Blaine. The clothes dropped from their hands as they scrambled to grab their flashlight from their pocket. In an instant, one of the shadows was behind them and gave their arm an icy grip.


    ¡°Don¡¯t be rude, we just wanted to help you pick out an outfit.¡± A twisted smile began to spread on its face. With Blaine¡¯s other hand, they quickly grabbed the laser pointer before the shadow could fully restrain them. The light sliced through the dark hand gripping their arm and it disconnected and fell to the floor. The shadow jerked back in pain, then stared up at Blaine with enraged eyes. Blaine puffed up their chest, believing this demonstration would be enough to send the group scrambling. The air slowly released, and their chest shrunk as the shadow reached down and picked up its severed hand. It placed the dripping hand on the remaining stump and Blaine watched in horror as the dark tendrils began to grip it and slowly regenerate, reattaching it completely. Two shadows gripped each of Blaine¡¯s arms and caused the laser pointer to fall to the ground. The now fully healed shadow came closer to Blaine¡¯s face and they could see its smile had curled into a big sneer. ¡°Now you¡¯ve pissed me off.¡±

 Shadows of Lust - Bad Blood

    A million thoughts were darting around Blaine¡¯s head, but none of them seemed to stand out as the main one. They wanted to ask themself so many questions, but their thoughts were all muted with the fear and imminent danger surrounding them. The main shadow used their newly regenerated hand to cradle Blaine¡¯s chin, rubbing a finger over their mask.


    ¡°Aww, you even came with your own muzzle.¡± It spoke endearingly as Blaine felt a cold hand behind their neck begin to tug on the straps around their ears. The tug started gentle but got tighter and tighter until the mask slipped itself inside of Blaine¡¯s mouth and slowly began to make them gag. They struggled to force the air to go through their nose and it instead tried to go through their mouth. Bits of cloth began to stick to the inside of their throat and even down their windpipe. Blaine began to struggle and shake as they desperately tried to wiggle the mask off. The two shadows restraining them laughed as they released Blaine in an instant, causing them to fall on their face and bite the inside of their bottom lip. The mask flung off after being released so quickly and landed in front of the main shadow, who pushed it aside just out of Blaine¡¯s reach.


    Tears began to stream down Blaine¡¯s cheeks as they frantically caught their breath. Realizing their face was now completely exposed, they tried to bring their hands in front of their mouth. Before they had barely started moving, the main shadow gripped Blaine¡¯s hands together in its own while one of the two behind Blaine tugged violently on their hair. Blaine was forced to stare the main shadow directly in the eyes.


    ¡°Why would you want to hide that pretty face?¡± The first shadow spoke.


    ¡°Are you sure this one is a girl?¡± The shadow pulling on Blaine¡¯s hair questioned.


    ¡°Only one way to find out.¡± The other shadow standing behind Blaine chuckled.


    ¡°Enough dress-up. Let¡¯s see what¡¯s going on under those clothes.¡± The main shadow lifted Blaine¡¯s arms above their head and began to reach for their shirt collar as Blaine began to involuntarily whimper. The fourth shadow who had still been watching from the entrance began to creep forward.


    ¡°Okay, you guys had your fun, now it¡¯s my turn.¡± It commanded, causing the other three to turn and stare. Apparently, they had not noticed this shadow enter with them as Blaine had.


    ¡°And just who the hell do you think you are?¡± The first shadow straightened up, but its grip on Blaine¡¯s arms did not loosen.


    ¡°Look, I know you didn¡¯t mean any harm, but that one is actually mine. I saw them first.¡± This intruding shadow picked up Blaine¡¯s mask from the ground and waved it in front of the other shadows so they could see. Blaine was confused, but noticed a small tendril just out of the view of the other shadows grip the laser pointer.


    ¡°What? Is that supposed to be some kind of proof of ownership? Hate to break it to you, buddy, but finders keepers.¡± Blaine quickly shifted their eyes to look back at the main shadow as it went back to continue Blaine¡¯s torment. They were not sure what this new shadow was planning, but Blaine did not want to get in the middle of it.


    ¡°I have a feeling you¡¯ll be the weeping losers.¡± Blaine heard the click of the laser pointer, and everyone stared in shock as the new shadow sliced into its own arm. Dark liquid began to pour down into its hand.


    ¡°Oh, so you¡¯re insane. Is that supposed to scare us?¡± The main shadow laughed, covering a hint of fear.


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    ¡°It should.¡± Before the other shadows had even a second to process what was happening, the new shadow flicked its drenched hand towards the main one and bits of liquid splattered onto its body. A faint hissing sound could be heard as the liquid seeped into the shadow¡¯s form, burning and filling them with pain. It began to scream and released its grip on Blaine¡¯s arms.


    Blaine barely had a second to think when their flashlight was kicked over to their feet by the new shadow, they reacted on impulse and grabbed it before the two behind them could notice. The flashlight was shone directly behind Blaine¡¯s head, and they heard enough to know they had hit the two. Their hair was released, and they made a break for the door, only to realize there was still a shadow standing in it. This shadow, whose motives seemed uncertain to Blaine, quickly gripped Blaine¡¯s arm and began running with them towards the exit. It was unclear who was following who as they both ran, but it became more clear once the shadow pulled Blaine into a corner and put a finger to where what looked like lips were. Blaine placed a hand over their flashlight and sat in stunned silence.


    Three dark figures ran by one at a time, angrily mumbling and cursing to each other. They passed right by Blaine and the shadow without much notice, it was possible they had given up. Once the coast seemed clear, the shadow beside Blaine let out a quiet sigh and turned towards them. Blaine thought they were prepared for pretty much anything this creature would do, but seemed unprepared when it reached its hand forward and handed back the laser pointer and mask. Like a frightened animal hesitating to take food from a stranger, Blaine slowly crept their hand forward and then snatched the items, inching away slowly afterwards. They carefully examined the mask to ensure it had not gotten any liquid on it, then placed it onto their face. After a couple minutes of silence, partially to ensure the other shadows were gone and partially due to the uncomfortable situation, Blaine was the first to speak.


    ¡°What now?¡± Though they were thankful to be out of the previous situation, they were not sure they were out of danger. ¡°Are you expecting me to believe you¡¯re letting me go?¡±


    ¡°I don¡¯t really expect you to remember, but you did the same to me¡± As the words came from the shadow, Blaine realized exactly who it was. They attempted to mask the fear that was beginning to creep up, it was unclear how much of a grudge this shadow held.


    ¡°Have you been following me?¡± Blaine suddenly felt vulnerable, as though they had no clue how safe they had actually been in the past few hours.


    ¡°Just a little. I wasn¡¯t initially, but I was hoping we¡¯d cross paths again.¡± The shadow reached a hand towards Blaine. ¡°You can call me Tim.¡± After a few seconds it became clear that Blaine was not going to return the gesture and Tim put its hand away.


    ¡°Is this you returning a favor or do you want something?¡± The little amount of patience Blaine had for these creatures was running thin, and it was taking all of their will not to reach for their flashlight.


    ¡°Getting straight to the point, huh?¡± Tim sighed; it had hoped the conversation would have been slightly less hostile. ¡°Look, I think there was a big misunderstanding. Those shadows you killed and I, we weren¡¯t the ones that attacked that village. We were just in the wrong place at the wrong time.¡±


    ¡°Likely story, get to the point.¡± Snapped Blaine, they were not willing to listen to a sob story from a shadow.


    ¡°I just want to know what you did with the human we had with us.¡± As Tim spoke, Blaine¡¯s eyes squinted with anger and contempt. ¡°It¡¯s not what you think, we didn¡¯t do anything bad to him-¡±


    ¡°Those shadows were right, you are insane. Why the hell do you think I would tell you that?¡± Blaine stood up, deciding this was not worth a fight. Tim stood as well.


    ¡°Please, you don¡¯t understand. I want to help him.¡± It reached to grab Blaine¡¯s hand and beg.


    ¡°Touch me and you¡¯ll see your friends again.¡± They puffed a breath of air from their nose angrily. Tim got the message, pulling away slowly. They began to walk away from the pitiful shadow.


    ¡°You seriously won¡¯t help me after what you did to them?¡± Tim was attempting to stifle its rising frustration.


    ¡°I helped you already, you helped me. We¡¯re done here.¡± As Blaine continued to walk away, Tim tried to squeeze another word in. As a sound came from the shadow, Blaine placed a hand on their flashlight and it was quickly silenced. They kept looking back to ensure they were not being followed, but they still felt uneasy and unsure. All of the objects that they passed as they headed home seemed to have even darker silhouettes that night.

 Shadows of Lust - The Devils Cure

    Paranoia was not a new feeling to Blaine, but it never got any easier to deal with. They dreaded the thought of returning to bed. If they were having nightmares beforehand, they were sure to be even worse after their recent encounters that night. Every step closer to their house filled them with more and more despair. They dreaded the thoughts that might fill their head as they stared at the stained carpets, the holes in the walls, the ripped curtains, and all of the other imperfections that had stories to accompany their damage.


    When they finally approached the front door, they gripped the doorknob with hesitation. Blaine took a deep breath to try and prepare themself for the flood of emotions. It was not enough, however. As soon as the door opened, they were overwhelmed with familiar sights, smells, and sounds that swarmed their brain with old and new experiences all blended together in a terrible tornado of senses. They began to inhale and exhale rapidly, with each breath brining new uncomfortable senses that made their breathing even faster. In seconds their eyes filled with tears and they dropped to their knees, clutching their head in their hands. As they tried to will their mind into silence, a quiet sound started to slither into their ears. It got louder and louder, until a sudden cold sensation on their shoulder forced them to open their eyes and turn their head.


    ¡°Are you okay?¡± The distorted voice finally became comprehensible to Blaine. As soon as they recognized what spoke, they scooted their body from the doorway to the carpet in shock and fear. ¡°Hey, hey. It¡¯s okay. It¡¯s me, Tim.¡± At first Blaine began to relax, but all of the emotions inside them quickly shifted from fear to anger as they stood and began to shout.


    ¡°You followed me home?¡± Blaine belted out, admittedly louder than they wanted.


    ¡°I wanted to make sure you got back safe.¡± The guilty looking shadow seemed to shrink below Blaine, desperately trying to avoid their rage.


    ¡°I don¡¯t need your help!¡± The urge to grab their flashlight grew, but a soft shuffling noise pulled away all of their senses.


    ¡°Blaine? Is that you?¡± A hoarse whisper broke through the cacophony of screams. Blaine¡¯s head shot to the hallway and saw the one familiar sight that usually brought them comfort, though in this moment it brought them more fear. In a second of panic Blaine¡¯s head shot behind their shoulder only to see the shadow who insisted on being called ¡°Tim¡± was nowhere to be seen. After a wave of relief, they looked back at the small figure in the hallway.


    The young boy standing in the hall clutched a blue blanket covered in small black stains. Despite the sticky mess, it provided him with comfort against the coldness that was slowly overpowering his tiny body. His hair, once brown and curly like Blaine¡¯s, was dark and slicked back to his scalp as though filled with gel. Blue eyes were sunken in and red with tears from constant coughing and sneezing. Though he was standing on his feet, he shook like he could collapse at any minute.


    ¡°Jesse! What are you doing out of bed?¡± Blaine rushed to the little boy¡¯s side, preparing to carry him if he fell over.


    ¡°I heard you come in and wanted to say hi. Who were you talking to?¡± Jesse looked around to see who the victim of Blaine¡¯s screaming match was only to see an empty room.


    ¡°No one, buddy. I was talking to myself.¡± Blaine lied, though they desperately wished it was the truth.


    ¡°You¡¯re pretty mean to yourself.¡± His words sounded like a joke but were said in total seriousness.


    ¡°I know.¡± They were thinking about how the statement was more true than Jesse realized. ¡°Come on, you should get back to bed.¡±


    ¡°I¡¯m hungry, Blaine.¡± Jesse attempted to whine but did not have enough strength, so it came out more like a pained whisper.


    ¡°Of course, buddy, let¡¯s get you something to eat.¡± Blaine held Jesse¡¯s hand and walked him to the kitchen. They lit the stove and put a can of soup into the pot. The smell made Blaine¡¯s stomach begin to rumble, but they knew Jesse needed it more. Though they had just gotten food from the village, the pickings were slimmer than they had hoped since they had just been attacked by those shadows. Blaine remembered what Tim had said about those shadows not actually being the culprits, and anxiety began to eat away at their mind. What if Tim was telling the truth and Blaine had killed innocents? Was it possible for shadows to be innocent? What if the village was still in danger?


    When Blaine tuned back into reality, they saw the soup starting to burn at the bottom and they quickly scraped it with a spoon. They poured it into a bowl and placed it in front of Jesse, who sat excitedly at a small wooden table, just big enough for both of them to sit at together. Despite that, Blaine remained standing, watching Jesse to make sure he ate and kept the food down. Jesse frowned at the bowl.


    ¡°Just one? Where is yours?¡± Despite his protests, he quickly began to slurp up some of the noodles.


    ¡°You need the food to get big and strong, I¡¯m already big and strong!¡± Blaine flexed their arms to show off muscles that were not quite visible through their long sleeves.


    ¡°But you could get bigger and stronger!¡± Jesse scooped some soup into the spoon and offered it to Blaine, who backed away slightly. The spoon, while filled with soup, was also coated in a thin layer of black mucus.


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    ¡°Jesse, I¡¯m fine, really.¡±  They said, trying to comfort their brother whose hand was beginning to shake just from holding the utensil. He continued eating with a defeated expression on his face until the bowl was mostly empty. Blaine could see in Jesse¡¯s weary eyes that he wanted to fight more to get them to eat, but they could not afford to waste any resources. They could live without another meal. Jesse¡¯s head began to dip down slowly then pop back up, struggling to lift itself as he was falling asleep over his bowl. Slipping the silverware and the bowl out of Jesse¡¯s reach, Blaine scooped his small body into their arms and began to carry him into his room. They clicked on an electric heater which had automatically turned off to avoid overheating, then wrapped Jesse in an electric blanket and proceeded to turn it on as well. Being in the room for more than 5 minutes was excruciating, the heat was a kind which felt like walking into a broken oven that did not care if its heat set the whole house ablaze.


    As Blaine tucked Jesse into bed, they heard a slight rhythm in his breathing. They leaned in and realized that he was actually humming a melody. It was the melody of a song that Blaine used to sing to Jesse when he was a baby, as well as whenever Blaine wanted to keep Jesse from hearing their father¡¯s episodes. They smiled and began to hum along with Jesse, causing his eyes to crack open slightly.


    ¡°Can you sing for me, please?¡± The sickly boy whispered, struggling to form coherent thoughts. Blaine sighed and nodded, opening their mouth slightly behind their mask and letting the melody continue with vocals. They did not particularly like their own voice, but they would do anything that comforted their brother. The hushed lullaby sang about escaping, finding a better place, and being happy. All of those sounded like impossible feats, both before and now. But when it was just the two of them together, they felt like for a moment they were transported to this better place together. As the last lyrics slipped from Blaine¡¯s lips, the humming from Jesse was replaced with a slight snoring. They stepped on the tips of their toes and crept out of the bedroom, shutting the door until it was barely cracked open.


    The couch released a puff of air as Blaine slumped their body down into the cushions. A puff of air was also released from Blaine¡¯s lips as they closed their eyes, trying to debate sleeping as well.


    ¡°He¡¯s sick, isn¡¯t he?¡± A quiet voice spoke, nearly causing Blaine to jump out of their skin. They turned and saw the annoyingly familiar shadow standing in the doorway Blaine thought they closed. ¡°Shadow syndrome?¡±


    ¡°What are you still doing here?¡± A shout-whisper mixture spewed from Blaine¡¯s throat. Tim looked at the ground in shame.


    ¡°I think we got off on the wrong foot, so to speak.¡± The shadow began.


    ¡°Well, we started with kidnapping, moved on to stalking, and now we have breaking and entering. Tell me again why I don¡¯t flip that light switch?¡± Blaine stuck a finger at a switch on the wall they knew was no longer functional.


    ¡°Believe me, you can if you want.¡± Tim stood under the light fixture stuck to the ceiling. ¡°But after all of the chances you¡¯ve had to kill me, you haven¡¯t. I don¡¯t know why, I don¡¯t know you, but I-¡± Blaine could see the hesitation in Tim¡¯s face. ¡°I need your help. And I think I can help you too.¡±


    ¡°How can you help me?¡± There was a bit of hesitation from Blaine. They wondered if they were considering a deal with the devil, but needed to know the terms first.


    ¡°My friends and I, we knew that the other shadows¡¯ behavior is wrong to say the least.¡± Blaine scoffed, but let Tim continue. ¡°The reason I wanted to find that infected person, the reason we had him in the first place, was because we were studying him. We wanted to find a way to help him. To cure him.¡±


    ¡°Why?¡± Blaine interrupted. ¡°What reason do you have for curing people?¡±


    ¡°Because I¡¯m ashamed, Blaine!¡± Tim held back, trying not to scream and wake Jesse. It took a moment to compose itself. ¡°I¡¯m ashamed that so many people are getting hurt by my kind. I¡¯m ashamed that I can¡¯t stop them on my own. I¡¯m ashamed of the way people look at me, waiting for me to pounce like some kind of animal who can¡¯t control my impulses. I don¡¯t benefit from a cure, but you do. That¡¯s all I care about. I need your help, Blaine. Even if I found a cure, who would trust me? Who would accept a cure from the same creature that made them sick?¡± Blaine contemplated; Tim had a point.


    ¡°What¡¯s your plan? Did you and your friends come to any kind of conclusion?¡± There was a hint of guilt in Blaine¡¯s voice as they mentioned Tim¡¯s friends.


    ¡°The way shadow syndrome works is different from a normal virus. It doesn¡¯t need the human host to survive. The shadow¡¯s DNA replicates inside a human cell and makes it something else. You can¡¯t fix the infected cells, but you can¡¯t eliminate them either. If every infected cell dies, then those parts of the person are gone too. They need to be replaced.¡± Tim spoke with the insight of someone who had studied this their whole life. Blaine admittedly struggled to follow.


    ¡°Replaced with what?¡± They asked, trying to comprehend what Tim was suggesting.


    ¡°Remember when I fought those other shadows? I was able to use my blood to fight them because my DNA is different from theirs somehow. It attacks theirs, neutralizes it.¡± Tim put its hands together and began pacing the floor. ¡°It was something my friends noticed with their DNA as well, it was the basis of our theories. If we could somehow get my DNA into an infected person, it could stop the hostile cells and stop it from spreading!¡± Blaine nodded along, trying to match Tim¡¯s quiet excitement.


    ¡°And you could do that with Jesse? How?¡± It was beginning to hit Blaine that this nightmare could possibly be over.


    ¡°Well, I would need to get my DNA into his body somehow, a blood transfusion would be simple enough.¡± Tim smiled, feeling like everything had finally been solved.


    ¡°Like with needles? Tim, Jesse is six, it was a fight just to get him a flu shot.¡± They hated shutting Tim down, but Blaine needed to be realistic.


    ¡°Well, I guess it doesn¡¯t have to be blood. Any kind of contact would do.¡± Tim pondered for a moment, then made an excited expression. ¡°Ooh! If it could be administered orally then there would be no need for needles. Some kind of mouth-to-mouth contact. A kiss, for example.¡±


    ¡°Get out.¡± Blaine growled.


    ¡°What?¡± Tim looked over with confusion.


    ¡°GET OUT!¡± They no longer cared about remaining quiet, they barely cared about remaining calm. Blaine struggled to look the shadow in the eyes. Tim shrunk back and began to speak, but after seeing Blaine¡¯s enraged expression it realized it had spoken out of turn.


    ¡°I¡¯m sorry.¡± That was all Tim could manage to say before slipping out of the door, which Blaine quickly shut and locked. Their eyes burned from blinking back tears and stifling screams. Out of all of the rage, fear, pain, and every emotion in between that was stewing in the pit of Blaine¡¯s stomach, one stood out as the dominant one. Betrayal.

 Shadows of Lust - A Moth to the Flame

    Why? There was no reason to trust this creature. There was no reason to have hope. There was no reason to believe life could go on. So why did Blaine feel this burning in their chest? They could not rationalize any of these questions, and it frustrated them. They let themself feel better, they let themself feel good for just a moment, and of course it was instantly ripped away. They wanted to scream, they wanted to hit, they wanted to break, but they knew better. They could not let Jesse hear that, could not let him see that, could not let him feel that. Not again. Somehow, this end of the world was supposed to be a new beginning for the two of them. Blaine was not going to ruin it.


    Even so, rage burned their chest as though someone had used a branding iron directly on their heart. They took sharp, quick breaths that felt like swallowing hot steam. They felt their stomach, which was severely lacking in contents (adding to the sour mood), twisting and churning. Blaine rushed for the bathroom and knelt by the toilet. They knew they had no illness, but imagining letting one of those monsters have its way with their brother made them sick. There was very little effort involved in emptying their stomach; they pulled down their mask, opened their mouth and clear bile seemed to pour out. Blaine curled their fingers in the shag rug that sat in front of the toilet and gripped hard, pulling on the strings hard enough to rip a few out. Just when Blaine thought they were finished, memories of their past failures shot into their skull like a bullet and forced more bile through their now gritted teeth. Tears began to peek out of the corners of their eyes and even their nose began to empty.


    It was stupid, it was dumb, they knew it was hopeless. They wanted so badly to start anew with their brother. They wanted so badly to make him happy in ways they never were. They had too high hopes for the apocalypse to be better than normal life. Blaine felt like a failure through and through, and this temptation of a cure was the final straw. It was a damning reminder that they were powerless to save their brother in the past and they were just as powerless now. Maybe it was never about their father. Maybe it was just Blaine that was the problem.


    Willing themself onto the sink, they started rifling through the medicine cabinet until they found their solution. Their father¡¯s razor sat in the mess of medications and other toiletries. Blaine fumbled until they were able to remove the blade from the razor¡¯s body. They pulled up their left sleeve to reveal the many scars from their father¡¯s frustrations, then placed the cool blade onto a particularly empty patch of skin. The blade lightly traced down their arm as Blaine imagined its path in their mind, trying to see if it would be large enough. It had to be. The edge pressed a little harder onto the skin. Blaine sucked in a deep breath.


    A loud, wet cough interrupted Blaine¡¯s train of thought. The hack turned from one to multiple quickly. Both Blaine¡¯s mind and hand slipped, the blade barely nicking the skin no deeper than a paper cut. In a moment, they felt their anger rise again, only to remember what it was they were getting angry at. They let their anger turn towards the very person they were trying to protect. The person they were about to leave behind. Tears burned their eyes, and they threw the razor into the trash can beside the toilet. Somehow the regret stung worse than the rage, it sunk deeper into their stomach and chest (though not enough to make them sick again). They rinsed the tiny drops of blood off their arm and pulled their sleeve back up.


    The walk from the bathroom to Jesse¡¯s room was only a few feet, but felt like a long walk of shame for Blaine. Each carefully quiet step brought on a new wave of grief. They finally approached and peeked their head into the room, only to see Jesse had surprisingly not been disturbed at all by Blaine¡¯s shouts, or their bathroom commotions. A couple of new stains on his blanket revealed it was merely a cough, not that the stains were a comforting sign. Blaine closed the door and sighed. Jesse needed help that they could not provide.


    They could hardly focus on the problem with the rumbling of their now completely empty stomach. Blaine contemplated getting more food from the village when a new idea popped into their head. The village had a doctor, Ishmael. Surely, he had some kind of medicine that could help. Without much of a second thought, Blaine readjusted their mask and nearly bolted out the door.


    The village was not too far from Blaine¡¯s house, it only took about 15 minutes to walk. Someone at the entrance allowed them in after they explained who they were. Near the middle of the campus, Dante was setting up a big pile of wood, lugging a big log in his hands. Blaine waved to him, but quickly realized that he could not wave in return. Instead, Dante gave a happy smile. After placing down the log, he came up to properly greet Blaine.


    ¡°Good to see you again, Blaine! I was worried you would just grab some supplies and run.¡± Dante patted Blaine, a little lighter than usual, on the shoulder. ¡°What brings you back?¡±


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    ¡°Admittedly, more supplies.¡± Blaine said with a mixture of humor and guilt.


    ¡°Of course! What did you need?¡± Dante did not seem upset; he was just happy to see Blaine again.


    ¡°Do you guys have any spare medicine?¡± Blaine¡¯s stomach let out a mighty roar. ¡°And food.¡± Dante let out a hearty laugh.


    ¡°Let¡¯s work on the food first.¡± He led Blaine to the cafeteria and then went back to his work.


    After a hearty meal, Blaine looked around for some medications only to realize there was none to be found. They asked the person running the cafeteria who let them know that all medications were given by Ishmael, which made sense to Blaine. They quickly made their way to the health center which, surprisingly, had no line. Blaine gave the door a slight knock.


    ¡°Who is it?¡± The familiar voice asked, to Blaine¡¯s surprise. They expected Ishmael to simply let them in.


    ¡°It¡¯s Blaine, I was hoping to get some medicine.¡± Blaine figured he must be with another patient.


    ¡°Oh! Hi, Blaine! You can come inside.¡± Ishmael¡¯s voice seemed surprised and relieved. Now Blaine was waiting for the disappointment. When Blaine pushed open the door, they were immediately blasted with a wave of cold air. They saw Ishmael writing something on a clipboard absentmindedly, but it was what was sitting in the chair next to him that shook Blaine to their core. A dark shadow sat in the chair, its eyes a light grey rather than the usual piercing white. Blaine made a quick grab for their flashlight when Ishmael interrupted. ¡°Oh, please no, I would never get the stains off the wall.¡± He reacted with a surprisingly casual tone.


    ¡°Ishmael, what is this? You¡¯re harboring a shadow?¡± Blaine stammered in confusion.


    ¡°What?¡± Ishmael turned towards the creature and then back at Blaine. ¡°You mean Peter?¡±


    ¡°Peter?!¡± Blaine could hardly find any words. ¡°As in the Peter I saved from those shadows?¡±


    ¡°Yes, that Peter.¡± Ishmael seemed to finally sense Blaine¡¯s confusion. ¡°Wait, do you not know all the effects of Shadow Syndrome?¡±


    ¡°Apparently not.¡± Blaine said with an exasperated sigh. Ishmael sat them down on the examination table as he began to explain.


    ¡°So, when a shadow¡¯s DNA makes its way into a human, it has one main goal: reproduction.¡± Ishmael pulled down a chart of a male and a female body. ¡°In females, or anyone with a female reproductive system, that is an egg. The shadow¡¯s DNA is able to attach itself to an egg and rewrite it, making an exact copy rather than keeping half of the female¡¯s DNA.¡±


    ¡°Yeah, I knew that. I saw those women in line the other day.¡± Blaine said, trying to show they were not completely clueless. ¡°And then men get Shadow Syndrome instead.¡±


    ¡°Precisely. When a shadow¡¯s DNA finds itself in a biological male, or a biological female who is unable to get pregnant, it begins to rewrite cells other than the reproductive cells. It begins to rewrite every cell inside the human body slowly, causing the effects of Shadow Syndrome you have likely seen: chills, shadowy discharge, oily hair, et cetera.¡± Ishmael walked closer to the shadow he referred to as Peter, a frown spreading across his face. ¡°But eventually, the human has no more human cells left, but whatever drives the shadows you and I see outside is not present in these infected humans. They are shadows, but they seem to almost lack life. If you think shadows are alive in the first place.¡± He waved a hand in front of Peter¡¯s face to show he had no reaction. Just a vacant stare in no general direction.


    ¡°Is Peter still in there somewhere? Can we still cure him somehow?¡± Blaine¡¯s voice was strained, they were starting to realize how grave the situation was truly.


    ¡°Well, unfortunately not really. We have yet to find a cure, but there are no human cells left in his body. He is no more alive than the puddles of shadow goo that lay on the ground after you kill a shadow. Not only that, but his DNA is now shadow DNA, so he could accidentally infect someone if we are not careful.¡±  Blaine noticed the gloves adorning Ishmael¡¯s hands and the white and blue face mask over his mouth and nose and realized that he was being extra cautious.


    ¡°So then, what do we do?¡± Blaine begged for an answer when there was a knock on the door followed by a familiar voice.


    ¡°Hey! It¡¯s Dante!¡± The voice explained.


    ¡°Come in!¡± Ishmael invited. Dante walked in and Blaine was hit with a strong smell of smoke. His hands were darkened with ash and soot.


    ¡°The bonfire is up, are you ready?¡± Dante looked over at Peter and then at Blaine, the color completely drained from their face.


    ¡°You¡¯re going to¡­¡± Blaine could not even say it.


    ¡°We are going to put him out of his misery and keep the village safe. Unfortunately, there is no alternative.¡± Ishmael once again had the strong air of authority that came with his title of mayor.


    ¡°Hey, it¡¯s okay, Blaine.¡± Dante attempted to provide some comfort. ¡°He¡¯s already gone, we are just making sure he can¡¯t hurt anyone else.¡±


    ¡°But what if we can cure him?¡± Blaine choked out, thinking in the back of their mind about Tim¡¯s idea. Dante and Ishmael looked at each other with sorrow in their eyes.


    ¡°Even if we could, there is nothing left to cure.¡± Ishmael said with certainty. Dante placed a hand behind Blaine¡¯s back and began to steer them out of the room.


    ¡°I¡¯m sorry, Blaine. Maybe you should go home. You might not want to see this.¡± Dante said softly, Blaine following his lead. As Blaine walked slowly back home, a few images flashed in their mind. They remembered how Peter had looked when they had found him with those shadows. Then they remembered what Jesse looked like now. They were frighteningly similar.

 Shadows of Lust - Black Stains

    Dark grey clouds began to fill the air, mixing with the smoke that was beginning to crawl up from the village¡¯s new bonfire. What had started as a trudging walk of shame had quickly turned into a desperate sprint. Blaine had no time to waste. Jesse had no time to waste. Light rain drops began to fall, christening Blaine¡¯s hair like morning dew. A distant thunder began to rumble. At any other time, Blaine would have been worried about running into a shadow, but now they were starting to hope for one in particular. A quiet voice began to escape their lips like a whisper growing into a chant, simply repeating one name.


    ¡°Tim? Tim, are you there? Please. I¡¯m sorry!¡± Blaine¡¯s quiet cries became loud wails, but as they saw their house approaching in the distance, they noticed a familiar dark figure standing in their path.


    ¡°Blaine, you have nothing to apologize for.¡± Tim said in a tired voice. ¡°I wasn¡¯t thinking, I shouldn¡¯t have said-¡±


    ¡°I need your help.¡± Blaine interrupted. ¡°Look, you were in my house before, did you see Jesse while you were there? Do you think he has much time left?¡± Blaine¡¯s voice began to break. ¡°Is he going to be okay?¡±


    ¡°Jesse? Your brother?¡± It took a few seconds for Tim to register everything Blaine was asking, but eventually it seemed to click, and Tim¡¯s expression turned grim. ¡°Oh yeah, I saw him for a second or two when I was with you. I can¡¯t exactly diagnose anything though; I can¡¯t say anything for certain.¡±


    ¡°Is he going to be okay?!¡± Blaine shrieked, causing Tim to back up in an involuntary reaction. The shadow let out a deep sigh.


    ¡°At the way he looked, he will probably be gone in the next day or so.¡±


    Blaine grew weak in the knees and collapsed to the ground. Their resolve had completely broken, and they began to let out heavy sobs on the grass below them. Fresh mud began to stain their hands, along with their face as they desperately tried to wipe away tears. Tim came closer to comfort Blaine but knew from before to keep a fair distance as well. Blaine was pulled back to reality as they noticed a small black puddle in front of them.


    ¡°I¡¯m so sorry.¡± Tim whispered, wiping dark liquid from its own eyes. ¡°I truly am.¡± This was the first time Blaine had seen any kind of liquid come from a shadow that was not resembling blood or saliva. Despite appearing almost identical, it seemed more comforting than the other two.


    ¡°You don¡¯t have to be.¡± Blaine sniffed. ¡°You didn¡¯t do anything.¡± Blaine took a deep breath. ¡°But you still can.¡± Tim squished its face in confusion.


    ¡°What do you mean?¡± The shadow stared in confusion.


    ¡°You really think that what you said could help Jesse?¡± Blaine¡¯s voice was empty, Tim could tell this was coming from a place of hopelessness rather than belief.


    ¡°Blaine, you don¡¯t need to consider-¡±


    ¡°Do you think it will work?¡± Blaine repeated, attempting not to sound cold.


    ¡°I can¡¯t make any promises, but I think so.¡± Tim replied honestly.


    ¡°Then it¡¯s the best chance we have.¡± Blaine said, lifting themself from the ground. ¡°Come inside with me, I¡¯ll talk to him.¡± Tim wanted to protest more, but realized it was unnecessary.


    As the human and the shadow entered the house, Tim lagged behind slightly, still hesitant. Blaine creaked open the door to their brother¡¯s room and paused. Jesse sat cradled in a ball, lying on his right side. Blaine put a hand on Jesse¡¯s arm and he shuffled, revealing a large patch of black discoloration on his face, partially covering his right eye. Blaine pulled back in shock as both eyes opened slightly, the right eye¡¯s features tinted with grey.


    ¡°Blaine?¡± Jesse¡¯s voice was soft and weak. ¡°Blaine, I¡¯m cold.¡±


    ¡°I know, buddy.¡± Blaine choked, trying not to sob. ¡°I brought someone who can help, but you need to be a brave boy for me, okay?¡± Blaine shifted their body so Tim was visible to Jesse, whose eyes shrunk in fear.Stolen story; please report.


    ¡°Blaine, what is going on?¡± Jesse whimpered.


    ¡°Look, I know it is scary, but I promise this is a nice shadow.¡± Blaine said softly as Tim waved awkwardly. ¡°I think it can help you.¡± Blaine backed up and let Tim approach hesitantly.


    ¡°Hi Jesse, my name is Tim.¡± The shadow whispered. ¡°I want to help, but I need to make sure you are okay with it. Are you comfortable to try?¡±


    ¡°What do you need to do?¡± Jesse asked, looking Tim up and down.


    ¡°If this is going to work, I need to give you a kiss.¡± Jesse shrunk down slightly.


    ¡°It¡¯s okay Jesse.¡± Blaine said, resting a hand on his cheek and brushing damp hair out of his face. ¡°I will be right here.¡± They took hold of Jesse¡¯s hand and gave it a soft squeeze.


    ¡°It won¡¯t be long, maybe 3 or 4 seconds.¡± Tim assured. ¡°But I won¡¯t do it if you don¡¯t want to.¡±


    Jesse hesitated slightly, looking from Tim to Blaine, then gave a slight nod. Tim looked at Blaine, who nodded as well, then back at Jesse. After a moment of acknowledgment from everyone, Tim leaned in and pressed its lips onto Jesse¡¯s. A couple seconds passed and there was a small hiss, followed by some steam rising from Jesse¡¯s face. Tim quickly pulled away; a pained expression painted on both faces.


    ¡°Okay, I think it¡¯s done.¡± Tim said, wiping liquid from its face.


    ¡°Jesse? How do you feel?¡± Blaine asked, leaning in to see their brother¡¯s face. Jesse¡¯s breaths were heavy. ¡°Jesse?¡± A grimace was still stained on Jesse¡¯s face, his eyes began to close. Panic began to rise up to Blaine¡¯s chest as they turned to look at Tim. ¡°Why isn¡¯t he better?¡±


    ¡°Jesse is pretty far along in the infection, I doubt the results would be instant.¡± Tim replied nervously, exchanging glances between the two humans.


    ¡°How long will it take? You said he only has a couple days!¡± Blaine was now unconsciously wiggling Jesse¡¯s shoulder in hopes his eyes would open again.


    ¡°We don¡¯t know that for sure, the infection is being fought now. He might be better in a few hours, maybe a few days.¡± Tim was once again speaking while lost in thought.


    ¡°DAYS? He doesn¡¯t have days! He needs to be okay!¡± Blaine¡¯s chest was rapidly heaving up and down, then almost instantly stopped. ¡°He needs to be okay.¡± This time the words came out soft and emotionless. Blaine stood and walked away, pushing past Tim as if the shadow was not even there.


    ¡°Blaine?¡± Tim called, concern beginning to grow. It paused for a moment as it looked again at Jesse and wondered if it should stay by his side, then looked back at Blaine who was now sitting on the porch steps slowly getting soaked by the steadily pouring rain.


    As the shadow approached, Blaine sat motionless. Their eyes were empty, yet not lifeless. There was a moment of hesitation as Tim¡¯s hand grew closer to Blaine¡¯s shoulder, but for the first time they did not draw away. Blaine was sopping wet, their face damp from rain and tears that seemed to flow steadily somehow without emotion. They resembled a mannequin, completely limp, using all of their energy to keep their head up facing the endless horizon.


    Tim decided there was no use having two sick humans, it was time to intervene. A gentle grip was formed around Blaine¡¯s arm as they were slowly lifted onto their feet. Their arm was strung across the head and neck of the shadow, its other arm doing the same to Blaine. It was as if Tim was puppeteering a life-size marionette, just barley keeping itself from manually moving each leg. As the two of them entered the dark bathroom, Tim glanced for a moment at the bloodied razor blade laying in the trashcan atop a pile of tissues, then back at the almost lifeless human at its side. Blaine was sat on the toilet seat with care, as Tim approached the bathtub with slight hesitation. It¡¯s eyes focused on the knob with the big red ¡°H¡± printed on it, then awkwardly reached for both and turned them. To the shadow¡¯s surprise, water actually began pouring. Now was the hard part.


    The first thing that needed to come off was the sweatshirt. It was dripping as soon as Tim gripped it. One hand went on the left sleeve while the other went on the bottom. Tim was pleased to feel there was an undershirt that was slightly less damp underneath. The shadow made eye contact with Blaine, who continued to just look through Tim. A gentle sigh escaped Tim¡¯s lips as the sweatshirt was carefully lifted up and over Blaine¡¯s head. It took a lot of strength for Tim to keep a straight face upon the sight of Blaine¡¯s scarred and bruised arms, their wrists darker than the rest of their skin. In an effort to not draw attention to it, Tim gripped Blaine¡¯s withered sneakers and fumbled a bit to untie the laces. They came off one at a time, taking the socks with them, and Tim closed its eyes in preparation for the next part. In a quick, yet gentle movement, Tim gripped Blaine¡¯s sweatpants and tugged. As the elastic expanded and gave one final contraction, Tim heard a slight drop of liquid that stood out from the rush of the water. Looking at the ground, Tim opened its eyes and saw the droplet of black on the floor. Tim moved towards the mirror and saw more cascading slowly down its body. The steam from the bath water was fogging up the mirror slightly, and Tim realized the temperature might have been good for Blaine, but not for a shadow.


    In a quick and careful movement, Tim reached for both knobs and turned them off to stop the flow of water. It turned to look at Blaine who was still staring vacantly into the wall. Tim struggled to hold back both tears and the other drops of liquid trickling down its form.


    ¡°I¡¯m sorry,¡± Tim said in a hushed voice. ¡°You¡¯ll have to do the rest yourself. Please.¡± As Tim began to close the door, one more phrase came out. ¡°You need to be okay too.¡±