《What did I wish for? (Progression, Urban Fantasy, Slice of Life)》


 Chapter 1: Wait, Back up....

    Kyle Anderman stared up at the purple topless girl hovering in the air above him and tried to make the world make sense. This is not easy in the presence of breasts, for anyone who enjoys breasts. It''s not even easy when they''re covered in a shirt and across the room. Kyle''s eighteenth birthday had been a few weeks ago, making things even harder...pun both intended and accurate. When they were about a foot from his face, bouncing softly, pinkish purple and attached to a woman sitting with her legs crossed floating about two feet off the ground it was nearly impossible.


    ¡°Hello Master!¡± The impossible floating topless girl said, making things significantly harder. He forced himself to look away from her, diverting his eyes to the ancient oil lamp that still floated in place on the counter. The one she appeared to have sprung from a moment ago.


    No, he told himself. That''s ridiculous.


    Still not allowing his eyes to stray back to what absolutely COULD NOT be a genie, he forced his mind to think logically. How had he gotten here?


    Calm down, he told himself. Think. What happened this afternoon?


    ~Four hours ago~


    The trouble started, Kyle figured, when he heard someone calling for help.


    Rolling Hills High School was one of the nicer schools in town, with big buildings and shiny everything, from the semi-real wood on the walls to the gleaming glass doors. Since it was after school there weren''t a lot of people in the building, so the sound of Kyle''s footsteps on the carpet seemed unnaturally loud.


    ¡°So are you coming by tonight?¡± Evan asked. ¡°New seasons starting up today. A couple of good ones. Red Continuum. Starblast.¡±


    ¡°Nah I gotta work tonight,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°No wait I know you!¡± Evan said with a grin. ¡°I know what you care about! Forgotten Garden starts up today too!¡±


    Kyle sighed and looked down at his friend. He and Evan Warnick had known each other since they were babies. They''d slept in the same crib, according to Evan''s mom. Over the years they''d grown closer and closer, a friendship bolstered by the fact that they were¡ªwell, outcasts wasn''t the right word. Outcasts implied someone had actually cast them out, which wasn''t what had happened. They weren''t shunned or hated, exactly, they were just...overlooked. And their natural instinct wasn''t to reach out, so life in Rolling Hills kind of flowed around them the way water flows around rocks in a riverbed.


    Someone might have mistaken them for brothers if they had looked anything alike. Kyle was on the tall side and actually had a fairly athletic body. This was not by choice, but circumstances had made him a good runner and he''d even been on the track team for a while until his hatred of crowds watching him made him quit. Evan, on the other hand, looked like he might blow away in a strong wind. He was short and very, very skinny. Unlike Kyle he needed glasses, which he adjusted a little as he stared up at Kyle''s face.


    ¡°I told you,¡± Kyle said. ¡°I gotta work tonight.¡±


    ¡°Skip it!¡± Evan said, waving a hand dismissively.


    ¡°I can''t,¡± Kyle said. ¡°I need the money. Besides, my grandpa might be a wacko but he''s helped me out a lot. I owe him you know? And I''m probably gonna be in the back, I can watch the premiers while I do inventory.¡±


    ¡°Alright alright fine,¡± Evan said. ¡°But you''re starting to turn into a pretty boring guy--¡±


    That was when they heard the call for help.


    ¡°What was that?¡± Kyle said, moving through the hallways towards the noise.


    ¡°Not our business?¡± Evan suggested, but he followed Kyle towards the lockers where they both saw what they''d been expecting¡ªDanny O''Brien pushing someone around. There was a freshman Kyle didn''t recognize huddled at the bottom of the lockers. Kyle didn''t even know if it was a boy or a girl, they were just someone small with mousy gray hair and wire rimmed glasses. They were curled up around their backpack, clutching it to their chest as Danny stood over them.


    Danny O''Brien was the reason Kyle was good at running. In kindergarten, Danny had been taller and fatter than the other kids. Now as they finished their junior year Danny was taller and stronger than the other kids, a wall of muscle. But whether it came from fat or muscle Danny had always enjoyed throwing his weight around, one of those people who couldn''t seem to enjoy life unless he was making sure somebody else didn''t.


    ¡°Okay yeah,¡± Evan said. "Definitely not our business."


    ¡°We can''t just leave them!¡± Kyle.


    ¡°So it''s better we get our asses kicked then some rando we don''t know?¡± Evan asked, but Kyle was already moving.


    ¡°Hey Danny!¡± Kyle shouted, stepping out into the hall. The big bully turned to glare at him.


    ¡°Get out of here Anderman,¡± Danny said. ¡°You''re not on my schedule today.¡±


    ¡°How do you keep a schedule when you can''t read, write, or count?¡± Kyle asked.


    Danny closed his eyes and took a deep breath.


    ¡°I see what you''re trying to do here,¡± Danny said. ¡°You''re trying to play big damn hero and get me to chase you instead of giving this idiot what she deserves. I''m gonna give you a chance to--¡± The apple core bounced off Danny''s forehead. Even Kyle was a little surprise he''d thrown it, let alone remembered he had one stuffed in the side pocket of his backpack. There was a moment of tense silence.


    Kyle started running before Danny started chasing. They''d been through this a few times before. Danny had literally chased Kyle onto the track team.


    ¡°You''re dead, Anderman!¡± Danny roared, chasing after him.


    You always make these promises but you never follow through, Kyle thought. He didn''t say the quip out loud because he was pretty sure he''d used up all his bravery for the day. Evan wasn''t around, which at first Kyle thought was good. Making himself scarce was smart, he couldn''t run the way Kyle could. Kyle bolted through the halls of the school, slamming his way out of a side door and out into an alley between two school buildings. He paused, just for a moment as the door closed behind him, and saw Evan coming.


    Unfortunately, Benny Gold was coming up right behind him.


    Benny had only moved to town a few months ago and apparently in Danny O''Brien found a kindred spirit. Benny had instantly chosen Evan as his target of choice, which was a problem because Evan couldn''t run as fast as Kyle could, he didn''t have the conditioning.


    ¡°Benny''s coming!¡± Evan shouted, passing Kyle where he stood.


    ¡°I know!¡± Kyle said, turning to run with Evan. Behind him he heard the door swing open, and then cursing. Taking a quick glance behind Kyle could see where Danny had followed Kyle out into the alley and slammed right into Benny. The two bullies were now attempting to untangle themselves from each other. He turned back to focus on running, easily passing the huffing, panting Evan.


    ¡°Kyle wait!¡± Evan said. ¡°I''m not a runner man I can''t keep up!¡±


    ¡°Just keep your momentum going!¡± Kyle said. ¡°Here we...go!¡±


    They reached a place where the wall on one side turned into a fence. The fence was low enough for Kyle to grab Evan by the arm and use his running momentum to swing the smaller boy over it. While Evan was still airborne Kyle jumped onto the opposite wall, using it as a platform to launch himself over the fence as he heard Evan hit the ground.


    Boioing!


    Well that was an odd sound for the ground to make, Kyle thought as he went over the top of the wall.


    Boioing!


    The mystery was solved when he landed on the ample and apparently quite springy chest of Coach Saunders. The Amazonian woman was over six feet tall, Kyle was a little surprised he hadn''t seen the top of her blonde head over the fence before they jumped, but then again he''d been distracted. He bounced off her and landed in the dirt. Coach Saunders was also the chemistry teacher, but she always seemed dressed for her coach''s role. Tank top, track pants, windbreaker, red baseball cap was her normal uniform, all on a powerfully built body that hadn''t even budged when the two boys slammed into her.


    ¡°Oh it''s you two,¡± she said, not even commenting that they''d both jumped over a fence and landed on her. ¡°Actually Kyle I was looking to talk to you before I went home.¡±


    ¡°Let''s walk out together!¡± Evan said. The coach shrugged, and they huddled around her for cover as they walked out into the parking lot. Unfortunately that meant Kyle couldn''t escape, and he knew what was coming.


    ¡°I want you to come and do track again next year,¡± Coach said.


    Kyle huffed. This was, technically, his final year of high school, but like a lot of kids in town he would be moving on to the state university the high school fed into. It was just down the road, he could see it from the parking lot. Coach Saunders, like a lot of the teachers, taught at both, so if he were to take her up on the offer he''d still be joining her team.


    If he took the offer.


    This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road. If you spot it on Amazon, please report it.


    ¡°You know that doesn''t work,¡± Kyle sighed, stuffing his hands in his pockets dejectedly.


    ¡°Only because you get in your own head at competitions,¡± Coach told him. ¡°If we could just get you over that, you''d be our top runner. You''re better than most of my Uni kids.¡±


    ¡°Yeah but we can''t get me over that,¡± Kyle said. ¡°We tried for two years remember?¡±


    ¡°And I think it''s worth trying again,¡± Coach said.


    ¡°And wind up stumbling around the track in front of everybody?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°To start with,¡± the coach said. ¡°I think we really could break you through the performance anxiety, if we gave you enough time. Your problem, Kyle, is that you sell yourself short. So short other people start believing it. This is my car. Look, just think about it okay?¡±


    Kyle said he would as she got in her car and drove off into the town of Rolling Hills. It wasn''t a big city or anything but it was large enough it had three high schools. Rolling Hills High School, the only one named after the town itself, had the biggest campus because it had more room. It was just outside of town, half built into the woods.


    ¡°I wish she''d stop doing that,¡± Kyle sighed.


    ¡°Trying to get you back on the team?¡± Evan said. ¡°I mean she''s not wrong you''re a great runner. Our little escape today proved that. Besides, the athletics program comes with a lot of advantages.¡±


    ¡°I can''t believe you signed up for sports this year,¡± Kyle shook his head.


    ¡°Manager for the Senior Girl''s Volleyball team,¡± Evan grinned. ¡°There were plenty of girl''s teams that needed managers, you could have gotten in on one too! Maybe try it next semester keep Coach off your back. Come on man, think of the opportunities!¡±


    ¡°And what kind of opportunities have you found, exactly? I''m good. I''m not signing up for a sports team just so I can perv on the players.¡±


    ¡°Your loss!¡± Eric laughed. ¡°Of course, gotta admit, I haven''t actually managed to see anything. They''ve got better security around the locker rooms than you''d think. I guess the real world doesn''t make things as easy for pervs as anime does...¡±


    Kyle shifted, suddenly feeling too tight in his skin. He''d never quite been able to get himself around this aspect of Evan''s personality. It wasn''t like he didn''t sympathize, Kyle didn''t have any better luck with girls than Evan did. And alright yes, fine, if he was right there with a hole in the wall to peek through he might. He''d hate himself for it, but he might. He had no illusions of being a saint, or particularly good at resisting temptation.


    But Evan...Evan just....


    Kyle shook his head. Evan was Evan, that''s all. He tried to put it out of his mind.


    ¡°Hey!¡± a familiar voice shouted. ¡°There they are!¡±


    Evan and Kyle turned to see Danny and Benny running at them up the street. Kyle took a moment to mutter a curse. Normally, they didn''t bother to stick to the chase. He and Evan had just tensed to run when a shadow fell over them from behind, bringing Denny and Benny up short.


    ¡°Oh man Trevor,¡± Kyle said, breathing a sigh of relief as he looked around. ¡°Am I glad to see you.¡±


    Trevor Lu had only moved to town about a year ago, but he''d been a sensation. Tall and athletic with sharp, east Asian features he''d become the main focus of every girl in school. There was a part of Kyle that wanted to hate him for that, but then came the day he''d worn his Anima Regula t-shirt in school and discovered Trevor was a fellow anime dork. Trevor was...well, Kyle was pretty sure he was a friend, which was a strange feeling. He''d made most of his friends in preschool, it felt...presumptuous, maybe? To think of someone he''d only known for about a year that way. But if he was okay to use the word then Trevor was the first new friend he''d made in years.


    ¡°Hey guys,¡± Trevor smiled. ¡°And hey, Danny and Benny! Want to come and have another of our little chats?¡±


    ¡°Don''t you got something better to do, Lu?¡± Danny growled, but the look on his face wasn''t so much defiant as it was frustrated and angry. Like a tiger who saw two helpless lambs through a fence it couldn''t break down.


    ¡°Nope!¡± Trevor said. ¡°My day is completely free! So how about it?¡±


    A guy like Trevor was an instant threat to Danny''s social dominance at the school, and so it had been less than a week before Danny went to talk to the new guy. You know, show him how things worked. Explain the pecking order and his place in it.


    Eight minutes later Danny was on the ground with a bloody nose, Trevor kneeling on his back and explaining (1) that being bigger and stronger than everyone was great but black belts in judo were better and (2) if Danny ever tried that again, Trevor would break something important. Kyle had been in awe. He remembered wishing he''d filmed it.


    ¡°Yeah you''ll get yours someday Lu.¡± Danny snorted. ¡°But I got better things to do today. Come on Benny.¡±


    ¡°I wish those assholes would just leave you alone,¡± Trevor sighed, his eyes lingering on their backs as they walked away. ¡°And you two assholes need to come hang out more,¡±


    ¡°We don''t fit in with your other friends,¡± Kyle pointed out. ¡°But thanks for the rescue. They''re unusually determined today.¡±


    ¡°You''d fit in fine,¡± Trevor said. ¡°You sell yourselves short, that''s your problem.¡±


    ¡°That''s what Coach said,¡± Kyle smiled.


    ¡°Look you just don''t get it,¡± Evan said. ¡°It isn''t easy for guys like us to make friends. And everybody in town already knows us as the weird kids.¡±


    There was an uncomfortable amount of bitterness in Evan''s voice, but Kyle couldn''t say he completely disagreed. After all this time, well, everyone knew everybody. And what everyone knew about Kyle and Eric is that they weren''t really friends with anybody. A preconception like that was a lot harder to break than Kyle thought a guy like Trevor would understand.


    ¡°Well I''d love to stay here and argue,¡± Trevor said, ¡°but I''m kind of on the run myself.¡±


    ¡°Another one?¡± Evan sighed. ¡°How many is that this week?¡±


    ¡°It''s a lot worse with the end of the year dance coming up,¡± Trevor sighed.


    ¡°Just be honest with them,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°They don''t listen to me,¡± Trevor sighed. ¡°They just...


    ¡°Oh there you are!¡± A girl said, waving at Trevor¡ªand yes, just at Trevor, Kyle would have bet she didn''t even see him and Evan there¡ªaround the corner. ¡°Trevor! I want to talk to you!¡±


    She started hurrying in Trevor''s direction.


    ¡°Gotta go guys!¡± Trevor said, bolting off down the street. Kyle and Evan slapped themselves back against the school fence to avoid being trampled as the girl stampeded past.


    ¡°I wish I had your problems!¡± Evan shouted in the direction of Trevor''s retreating back.


    ¡°Hey,¡± Kyle said, tapping his friend on the arm. ¡°Look.¡±


    A girl lay crumpled on the road. She was resting on her shoulder blades, the back of her neck and her knees on the asphalt, her hips high in the air. The dark maroon knee-length skirt she wore kept her modest, but her gray sweater and the t-shirt underneath it had fallen to reveal her midriff. She looked up at them through thick square rimmed glasses and blinked.


    ¡°Kyle,¡± she said, picking herself up the ground and dusting off, her clothes falling back into place. A trickle of blood ran from a cut on her forehead. ¡°Hello. Do either of you need medical attention?¡±


    ¡°You''re the one who''s bleeding!¡± Kyle pointed out.


    ¡°Oh?¡± she reached up and touched her forehead. ¡°It is just a scratch. Thank you for your concern.¡±


    As always her voice was flat, nearly emotionless. This led a lot of people to conclude she didn''t care. Kyle and Evan knew better. It was just that Betty Peltzer had always been like that. He and Evan had known her almost as long as they''d known each other, and even as a toddler there had been a fuzzy layer of gray cotton between her and the rest of the world. Together they formed the towns Loser Trio, though Kyle doubted anyone else actually thought of them like that. It was a name they''d come up with for themselves after an anime marathon.


    ¡°Chasing after Trevor with the other girls huh?¡± Evan said. ¡°I didn''t think you were into that kind of thing.¡±


    ¡°I was not pursuing Trevor,¡± Betty pushed her glasses up her nose. ¡°I was walking down the street having just purchased some important research materials...is my bag around here somewhere?¡±


    ¡°Right over here,¡± Kyle said, picking a brown paper bag up off the ground. It was a little scuffed and torn, but it still held it''s contents. It felt like books. Through one of the holes Kyle could see what looked like a green rabbit. Through another....no it couldn''t be could it? Wait yes, yes it was, it was an anime girl. In a ball gag. ¡°Uhm...Betty? What exactly is this research for?¡±


    ¡°My project,¡± Betty said, holding out her hand and staring at him blankly. There was no evasion or guile in her expression. In that moment, Kyle realized she would tell him everything if he asked for details. And in that moment, Kyle realized he was probably better off not knowing.


    ¡°Here you go,¡± he said, handing her the package.


    ¡°Thank you,¡± Betty said, tucking the brown paper and suspicious books under her arm. ¡°As I was saying, I was just walking home when Trevor ran past. I said hello, but he did not appear to notice me. He was quickly followed by that girl, and I found myself stampeded...¡±


    ¡°You need to be more careful,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°I do have an unfortunate tendency to get wrapped up in my thoughts,¡± Betty admitted.


    ¡°Hey Kyle,¡± Evan said. ¡°Isn''t it getting late? I''m gonna head home. You should get to the shop.¡±


    ¡°Oh yeah!¡± Kyle said. ¡°Sorry, I gotta go.¡±


    ¡°No problem,¡± Evan said. ¡°See you later.¡±


    ¡°Wait!¡± Betty ran after Evin. ¡°I...I...¡±


    Kyle resisted the urge to stay behind and see how things worked out. Betty didn''t need that, and curious as he was he didn''t feel like being nosy. Instead he headed on towards his grandfather''s antique shop wondering if today would be the day.


    Sadly, no. Betty caught up with him a moment later, the corners of her mouth turned slightly down. Which on anyone else would be miserable sobbing in the street.


    ¡°Chickened out again, didn''t you?¡± Kyle sighed.


    ¡°I am not good at personal interaction,¡± Betty groaned.


    ¡°Look you guys are made for each other,¡± Kyle said. ¡°You''re super smart, he''s super smart. You like the same shows, you''re both enormous perverts...¡±


    ¡°I am slightly offended by that assertion,¡± Betty said.


    ¡°I saw some of the cover in your bag,¡± Kyle pointed out.


    ¡°Oh but those materials are for my project!¡± Betty said. ¡°It is actually quite fascinating...¡±


    ¡°Don''t change the subject,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Just ask him out already! The dance is a perfect opportunity!¡±


    Or at least Kyle thought so. He didn''t really go to dances. But the school was absolutely covered with posters for the Spring Formal Dance, and it was classic right? Boy and girl go to the school dance? A million eighties and nineties movies couldn''t all be wrong.


    ¡°I understand that strategically your suggestion would be the best choice,¡± Betty said. ¡°But I am having a great deal of difficulty putting it into practice.¡±


    They had almost reached the shop by now, marked a hanging wooden sign with gold lettering that read ¡°Ardman''s Antiques.¡± It was a three story building, part of a row of three story buildings. Most of the buildings on the street had one business on the ground floor and another on the second, but the antique shop actually had living space up top where Kevin had lived for the past several years. He turned away from the building to look at Betty.


    He wished he''d notice she was beautiful earlier.


    Betty probably didn''t think of herself as beautiful. The big sweaters and simple skirts were the kind of clothes people wore when they weren''t thinking much about what they looked like. And there was the extra layer of having known her since they were both kids. But her round cheeked face was beautiful, underneath the glasses and the bland expression, and once he''d started thinking that way he''d noticed even those baggy sweaters couldn''t completely hide everything she had underneath...


    He shook the thoughts out of his head. The truth was he hadn''t noticed her at all, hadn''t thought of her as a girl, until the day she told him she thought she was falling for Eric and asked him for advice. And being jealous of that was...wrong. A betrayal. One of his closest friends wanted to be with his best friend, and it would be unfair to make them unhappy just because he was lonely.


    Kyle pushed the door open and led them into the store. It was a big space full of junk, really. Old junk displayed on tables, or resting on shelves, or displayed in little glass cases. Kyle didn''t understand why people kept buying it, but they did. Sitting behind the desk at the back of the room was his grandfather, a skinny balding old man in a baggy shirt.


    ¡°Well I''m not exactly in a position to give dating advice,¡± Kevin said. ¡°But you two are my best friends, I''d love to see the two of you happy together. And I know for certain Evan has no idea any girl is interested in him. But it''s never going to happen if you don''t talk to him.¡±


    ¡°Yes. I have perhaps been inefficient in making things clear to him.¡±


    ¡°You mean you haven''t been making it clear to him at all.¡±


    ¡°I cannot deny that,¡± she said with a small frown. ¡°I suppose it would be best for me to go and let you work. I will see you tomorrow at school.¡±


    ¡°Yeah. See you.¡± He waved goodbye and headed for the desk.


    Okay, Kyle thought in the present, still putting the pieces of the day together. So far so good. Hanging out with Evan and Betty, run in with Danny. Normal.


    How the hell did we get to flying topless women again?

 Chapter 2: Wish Rules and Friendly Harem Girls

    Kyle stared in confusion at the beautiful half naked girl floating in front of him. This was insane. Impossible. Crazy. Maybe I should touch her to make sure she''s real, an evil voice in his mind suggested, but he fought it down. But now that the image was in his head he couldn''t get rid of it. A part of him wanted to reach out to that dangling chest, grab it, pull her close, then start sliding those harem pants down...


    ¡°Your wishes will be granted Master!¡± the genie said cheerfully.


    ¡°Wait what!?¡± Kyle said, starting to panic. ¡°I didn''t do anything! I...hold on. Just...just hold on.¡±


    He grabbed a chair, pulled it up, and sat down. He was having trouble getting blood to his brain but he forced himself to focus. He would forgive himself for the urge to grab her chest, that was shock and hormones. He needed to think it through logically.


    I was going over the day. I''d just come home to work. How did that go again? Take it step by step...


    Kyle walked up to the front desk, a disturbing glint in his grandfather''s eyes. He loved the old man, he really did, but sometimes his grandfather could be...a dirty old man. There was really no other way to look at it.


    ¡°Who was that?¡± the old man asked, waggling his eyebrows. ¡°Is that a girlfriend? Do I get details?¡±


    ¡°That''s Betty grandpa,¡± Kyle sighed. ¡°You''ve met her before.¡±


    ¡°That''s Betty?¡± His grandfather shook his head. ¡°The little mousy thing you and Evan used to play with in the neighborhood? Damn, she grew into one hell of a body huh?¡±


    ¡°Grandpa,¡± Kyle glared at the dirty old man, exactly as if he hadn''t had the same thought a few minutes ago.


    ¡°Just stating a fact,¡± his grandpa said, raising his hands. ¡°I''m a dirty old man, not a cradle robber. She''s way too young for me. So did you get your hands on--¡±


    ¡°Grandpa!¡± Kyle snapped.


    ¡°Gotta work fast boy!¡± The old man cackled. ¡°Before she realizes what a hottie she''s turned into and goes around school breaking hearts. You''re all eighteen now.¡±


    ¡°She''s...like a sister to me!¡± Kyle said, only half lying. ¡°Besides she''s already interested in Evan.¡±


    ¡°That so?¡± the old man shrugged. ¡°Well not much you can do about that. Go sort out the stuff in back. We just got a new delivery, and they sent a bunch of junk along with the main attraction.¡±


    ¡°What main attraction?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°Well it could have been these,¡± his grandfather said, reaching down below the counter and pulling out a silk-lined case with a pair of old revolvers in it. The barrels were bent and cracked. ¡°These, my boy, are the very guns wielded by Scottish Bart in his legendary gunfights in the old west!¡±


    Kyle gave his grandfather a blank stare.


    ¡°Well?¡± his grandfather pressed.


    ¡°You''re seriously going with Scottish Bart?¡± Was all Kyle could say.


    ¡°Worth a shot,¡± the old man sighed. ¡°Don''t know who they really belonged to, of course. They ARE that old though. Busted up like this they''re mostly just junk, unless they get restored. Not sure if it''s worth the money to do it just yet. Well they were just a bonus anyway. No no no the real main attraction is this! Our shop''s new treasure! Our pride and joy!¡±


    He pulled a bronze statue out from under the counter. Kyle had to admit, even working in the antique shop for so long it was the most detailed sculpture he had ever seen. It looked absolutely perfect. In fact, it was a little...too detailed.


    ¡°Grandad how much money exactly did you spend on....well I can''t call it anything else can I? Grandpa how much money did you spend on this ancient porn?¡± Kyle groaned.


    The statue was of a completely naked woman leaning backward, her breasts jutting high in the air, her legs just slightly spread so you could see...well, everything. An extremely detailed everything.


    ¡°Don''t be an asshole!¡± His grandfather snapped. ¡°This is a work of art! A depiction of the female nude!¡±


    ¡°Yes there''s a lot of depictions of the female nude all over the internet,¡± Kevin said. ¡°They''re called porn.¡±


    ¡°Can''t you see the artistry?¡± The old man insisted. ¡°The attention to detail? The craftsmanship?¡±


    ¡°Yes I completely agree that whoever made that was incredibly talented,¡± Kyle said. ¡°He was just incredibly talented at making porn.¡±


    ¡°When it''s this old it''s culture!¡± his grandfather said. ¡°Haven''t you heard of ¡°Il Venus de Urbino?¡± The Duke of Urbino wanted a painting of a naked woman to hang on his wall, and Titian gave him a classic work we still revere to this very day!¡±


    ¡°At least in that painting she''s got a hand over her crotch,¡± Kyle said. He''d taken an art history course at his grandfather''s urging and found himself surprisingly interested, so a lot of it had stuck. ¡°Whoever made that had a filthy mind.¡±


    ¡°Or was working with an accommodating model,¡± the old man''s eyebrows waggled again. ¡°But fine, if you''re not going appreciate fine art go sort the new boxes while I polish this.¡±


    That got him a flat eyed stare.


    ¡°And don''t look at me like I''m a disappointment!¡±


    Kyle walked into the back room and saw three open crates on the desk. It really was a lot of junk, but they had a better chance of selling most of it than they did the statue. Cheap little things people could brag about sold for a lot more in a place like this than some old statue. Well maybe an extremely rich pervert would come in, they could hope.


    Kevin put his bag on the table. Then he pulled out his laptop, plugged it in, and opened up AniBlast. There they were, the new seasons Evan had been talking about...and not seeing any reason to deny the obvious, he clicked on the new season of Forgotten Garden. It started with a new opening, which he half-watched while pulling up the crates of junk his grandfather had bought. On his computer screen there was first the familiar face of the various characters. Kai, reincarnated office worker, then of course his two main girls, the ditzy blonde and the no nonsense brunette, and a few new faces¡ªall, of course with a great deal of attention paid to animating their breasts as they hopped and danced and cast spells through the opening scene, because that''s how anime be sometimes.


    Having long ago mastered the art of reading the subtitles out of the corner of his eye while he worked on other things, he let the anime play and turned half his attention to the boxed of junk his grandfather had bought. Old lanterns, old statues, most of it not really ancient but some of it was. Ancient or relatively new most of it would, ultimately, get sold. To people looking for something interesting to put on their coffee tables, or sometimes people from prop departments came in looking for scene filler. All Kyle had to do was write it all down to be priced later, which unfortunately didn''t require a full half of his brain.


    Here, alone, he could admit he was jealous of Evan.


    There were other things too. If Evan and Betty got together¡ªand he hoped they did get together, he really did! He was sure¡ªhow would that change things between the three of them?


    But more than that, when it came to girls...well, when it came to girls Kyle had no experience. Zip. Zilch. Zero. Nada. None. Except of course for Betty, but she didn''t count. Not like that. He just wasn''t someone who got noticed, that was the trouble. And he was no good at making himself get noticed by anybody either. Can''t get a date if hardly anyone knows you exist.


    With a sigh, he turned his attention back to the anime while he reached into the crate for the next item to catalog. Kai''s party was theoretically gearing up to fight the big demon lord they''d set up at the end of last season, which had involved buying everyone new armor, and now there was a lot of yelling because the girls had fallen into his dressing room and everbodies straps were tangled. An awful lot of body gyrations, suggestive moaning, and double entendre.


    Demons and casual horniness. Problems, Kyle thought, for a simpler world.


    He turned away from the screen and shook his head. He was getting maudlin and grumpy, which wouldn''t do anyone any good. Resolving not to let his mind wander because it obviously didn''t know how to behave itself, he finally actually pulled the item he''d grabbed out of the box.


    It was an old oil lamp.


    The lamp like something out of the Arabian Nights. A lot of people thought the long spouted teapot looking thing really was a teapot or something and the ¡°lamp¡± name was because of weird translation or old uses of the word or something, but his grandfather showed him how it worked once. You poured oil inside it. The fumes from the oil floated up the spout, and then you lit them when they came through the hole at the top. But it was so easy to imagine a genie pouring out of it...


    He rubbed the side of it. Who wouldn''t? And for just a second his chest tightened in anticipation. But there was no puff of smoke, no magical being there to change his life. He laughed at himself and looked inside. Empty. What had he expected to see, a little house? He started checking the lamp for leaks. None that he could see. Still better to be sure...


    Actually didn''t they have some oil that would work? It came in big plastic jugs these days but there were a lot of old lamps and things that used the same kind of oil so they had some around for demonstrations. He found the jug under the office table and poured a little in the lamp, then he put the cover back on. He waited a minute for the fumes to go¡ªhe had to find a lighter anyway¡ªfinally digging one out of the bottom of a drawer¡ªand lit the end of the lamp. The flame caught easily, a playfully flickering orange dot.


    You might be reading a stolen copy. Visit Royal Road for the authentic version.


    ¡°Hey it still works!¡± he said. ¡°I''ll show gramps. Maybe we can use it for a display...¡±


    The flame twitched and jumped. Then it turned purple.


    Then it exploded.


    A huge whoosh of purple fire and pinkish smoke erupted from the spout of the lamp and something shot out like a rocket, leaving a trail of smoke behind as it spun around the room. Finally it¡ªSHE¡ªlanded right in front of him.


    The girl had pinkish purple skin and sparkling amber eyes. Her ears were pointed, with huge dangling earrings, and her dark purple hair was held in a ponytail by a golden cylinder covered in odd designs. She had three gold bracelets on one arm, and she wore harem pants with pointed cloth shoes.


    And that was all she wore. Her large, soft-looking breasts floated free, bouncing in front of her fit, curvaceous body as she floated in the air. It was not, normally, the kind of thing a conscientious narrator should fixate on, but the narrative is following Kyle. And Kyle''s eyes weren''t going anywhere else in a hurry.


    ¡°Hello master!¡± The impossible floating topless girl said, making things significantly harder. He forced himself to look away from her, diverting his eyes to the ancient oil lamp that still floated in place on the counter. The one she appeared to have sprung from a moment ago. ¡°Thank you so much for summoning me!¡±


    And with that, Kevin was all caught up.


    ¡°I...¡± he stammered intelligently, his mind coming back to the present. ¡°I....uh...huh....huwh!?¡±


    ¡°Hey!¡± the purple girl said, floating across to his laptop. ¡°What''s this thing? It looks fun! Ooh, I wanna try her outfit on.¡±


    Kyle looked over at the laptop to see the screen dominated by Mona, a recurring villain on Forgotten Garden. What she wore basically boiled down to two strips of cloth that always clung to her ass like they were wet and two more that only technically covered her nipples. Like most of the characters on the show she was some artist''s wild erotic fantasy, which suddenly made a lot more sense than anything else in his world.


    ¡°Oh I get it!¡± Kyle said, clapping his hands together. ¡°You''re not real.¡±


    ¡°What? Of course I''m real!¡± the genie girl pouted.


    ¡°No,¡± Kyle said. ¡°You''re just a mix of me thinking about being lonely and about genies when I was checking out the lamp, so I hallucinated a sexy genie. Probably from the lamp oil fumes. That makes sense.¡±


    ¡°No I''m really reaaaaal!¡± the genie whined. ¡°Come touch me and see!¡±


    ¡°Exactly what a frustrated sexual fantasy would say,¡± Kyle nodded.


    ¡°Oooooo!¡± the genie groaned. Then she shot through the air like a rocket and crashed into him. The impact was jarring, as were her arms wrapping around his neck, but his focus was taken up almost entirely by the warm softness that entirely engulfed his face The genie''s flying tackle knocked him backwards off the chair and he slammed into the ground, but all he could think about was how she smelled of spiced cherries and how warm and soft her skin felt against his.


    It was too much to handle. He''d never even touched a girl before and now he was face down in the most amazing pair of breasts¡ªwell let''s face it, the ONLY real pair of breasts¡ªhe''d ever seen in person. She was real, she really was real, he''d found a real genie, and how he had his face buried in her breasts and...


    Oh yeah, breathing! He ought to be breathing! But that would mean taking his face out from between....


    She did it for him, pulling away to look him in the eyes, her face all hurt innocence and pleading.


    ¡°Now do you believe I''m real?¡± she said, once his face was out from between her breasts.


    ¡°Y-yeah,¡± he said. ¡°Yeah sure, I guess I...what''s wrong?¡±


    She had a distracted look on her face, and she was blushing. He looked down at his hands. His right hand had cupped one of her breasts and did not seem interested in moving, except to kneed his fingers softly.


    ¡°Gah!¡± Kyle said, pulling his hand away. ¡°I''m sorry!¡±


    ¡°It''s okay!¡± the genie said. ¡°A lot of my masters try stuff like that. You''re actually really nice, for one of my Masters, so I won''t curse you for it or anything.¡±


    ¡°O-okay,¡± Kyle said, getting up. ¡°I''m actually kind of glad you said that, maybe the threat of curses will help me restraing myself. I don''t know how it was last time you were out of the lamp, but now...doing stuff like that. It''s not right.¡±


    He picked up the chair and sat down.


    ¡°You okay in there boy?¡± his grandfather called from the front room. ¡°I heard a noise.¡±


    ¡°I''m fine just slammed a crate down too hard,¡± Kyle called back. The response was automatic, he had no interest in explaining all this to the old man. ¡°There wasn''t anything breakable in it!¡± Except me.


    ¡°Okay. As long as nothing''s damaged.¡±


    Again, me. I''m damaged.


    With his grandfather dealt with, Kyle looked at the genie and started thinking seriously about what was going on. He''d found a genie. That could be either a very good or a very bad thing. He''d seen stories where genies were helpful spirits, and stories where they were evil tricksters. She didn''t look evil, but he had to be intelligent about this. It could all be a trick. How did this work?


    ¡°Well let''s take this one step at a time,¡± he said. ¡°What''s your name?¡±


    The genie blinked.


    ¡°Why do you want to know my name?¡± she asked.


    ¡°Well I already...y''know...groped you a little,¡± Kevin blushed. ¡°And again I''m sorry about that, I really shouldn''t have done it. But the point is I should at least know your name. And if we''re going to talk I need to know what to call you.¡±


    ¡°Most of my Masters just call me genie,¡± the genie said. ¡°I had a name, a long time ago, buuut...I don''t remember.¡±


    ¡°Uhm, okay,¡± Kevin said. ¡°How about if I call you, uh...Jenny? Is that okay? No, it''s not, it''s just the first thing I thought of because it sounds like genie I can...¡±


    ¡°No it''s wonderful!¡± she said, sparkles appearing in her eyes. ¡°It''s absolutely wonderful! Thank you Master!¡±


    ¡°And I''m not super comfortable with you calling me that,¡± Kyle said. ¡°My name is Kyle, okay? Kyle Ardman. Just call me Kyle.¡±


    ¡°I can''t do that!¡± the genie said. ¡°You''re my Master!¡±


    If you had told Kyle he would one day be upset about a sexy topless woman calling him master, he would have slapped you in the face and called you a liar.


    ¡°Okay¡± he said. ¡°Okay fine. For now. Uhm, how about putting a top on?¡±


    She looked down at her chest.


    ¡°But I''ll get itchy!¡± she complained. ¡°And I don''t have a top.¡±


    ¡°Can''t you magic one up or something?¡± he said. ¡°I''m sorry, I''m sorry, I know I just...I''m just getting a little distracted. I know, that''s really my problem, not yours, but I need to focus on all the weirdness going on so please?¡±


    ¡°Well alright,¡± she said. ¡°But I can''t get one with magic. That''s not how it works.¡±


    ¡°Uh, okay,¡± Kyle said. He grabbed his own shirt and pulled it off, handing it to her. ¡°That might be a little sweaty, I was running earlier...¡±


    ¡°No it''s fine,¡± she said, sliding the shirt over her head. It had been designed for someone bigger than her but with a much flatter chest, so the fabric threatened to tear, but she was covered and he could take his eyes off her nipples now, a feat mere effort of will had been unable to achieve.


    ¡°Thank you,¡± Kyle said, sighing with relief. ¡°Okay, so I guess my first question is...how does this work? Do I get three wishes? One wish? What?¡±


    ¡°You get three wishes,¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°Hmm,¡± Kyle said, his mind racing. If he wasn''t hallucinating, this was a golden opportunity. He didn''t dare waste it. ¡°I need to think about this then. Depending on what I wish for, I could really screw myself up. And I don''t want to accidentally cause side effects that could hurt people or blow up the world...¡±


    ¡°But you don''t get to pick them,¡± Jenny cut in. ¡°Or, you get to pick one, but you kinda already did. Lots of people make that mistake. Same thing with the other two, for other people.¡±


    ¡°Sorry,¡± Kyle said. ¡°I got confused.¡±


    ¡°You already have a wish,¡± Jenny said. ¡°One wish, deep in your heart. The one thing you truly desire above all others. When you ask me to grant your wish, that wish will come true. Two other people close to you, who''s souls are connected to yours, will also get their deepest wish granted too. The thing they truly want more than anything else in the entire world.¡±


    ¡°But what if what they want changes?¡± Kyle asked. ¡°I mean, when I was five I wanted to be a whale.¡±


    ¡°Not stuff like that,¡± Jenny giggled. ¡°Basic stuff. Deep down in your soul.¡±


    ¡°Okay,¡± Kyle said. ¡°But can it, like, hurt me? Can I make my wish and it rebounds in my face? Like I wish for world peace so everyone on earth dies?¡±


    ¡°No not like that,¡± Jenny said. ¡°And a wish for world peace might not work, anyway. There are things wishes can''t do. Besides that''s almost never the kind of thing people really wish for deep in their hearts. They want a war to stop, or suffering they know about to stop, that kind of thing. But it might...look. Let''s say you wished to be the richest person in the world, right? That was the deepest wish of your heart.¡±


    ¡°Okay,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°Then you would, I dunno, stumble across a gold mine or something,¡± Jenny said. ¡°But then you would be the richest person in the world, so...¡±


    ¡°So you''d have all the problems that come along with that,¡± Kevin said. ¡°You''ve got to live with the consequences of whatever you wished for. What about all the stories of people getting to make their own three wishes?¡±


    ¡°That''s a thing wizards can do,¡± Jenny said. ¡°A powerful wizard can force specific wishes out of a genie. But it takes a lot of magic, so even the strongest wizards can only do it two or three times, and the wishes are never as powerful, and the genie is usually super annoyed when they try to do it too, so they mess with the wish.¡±


    ¡°And that''s where the stories about tricky wishes came from,¡± Kyle said. That kind of made sense. As for finding out there were wizards, well he just found out there were genies he wasn''t about to start questioning that kind of thing now. The disbelief and panicked screaming at a world where all the rules had changed could come later. ¡°The deepest wish of my heart...I can''t think of one.¡±


    ¡°Most people can''t,¡± the genie said. ¡°It''s so deep inside they don''t even realize it.¡±


    ¡°Who else gets the wishes?¡±


    ¡°I don''t know,¡± Jenny said. ¡°Two people who''s souls are close to yours. They don''t even have to be people you know. They could be people you pass in the street every day, or people you will meet once your own wish is granted.¡±


    ¡°Huh,¡± Kevin said. ¡°And you''ll grant them when I ask?¡±


    ¡°I will!¡± Jenny said. ¡°But be careful Master...even I don''t know what your deepest wish is. I won''t even know after I cast it, not right away. And you''ll have to deal with it once it happens.¡±


    ¡°Yeah,¡± Kevin said. ¡°When was the last time someone made a wish? That you know about?¡±


    If it was around the same time as some kind of massive war or disaster, he was going to cut this off right now.


    ¡°It was a long time ago,¡± Jenny said. ¡°I lose track of time inside the lamp. But they were wearing a lot more clothes. And they talked like this.¡±


    She let out a few syllables. Kyle couldn''t recognize the language at all.


    ¡°Sorry I don''t know that place or time,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Wait! How are you talking to me like a modern American?¡±


    ¡°Oh I copied the language off your mind when you summoned me!¡± Jenny said. ¡°It''s automatic. I can talk just like a modern person! America is the kingdom we''re in?¡±


    ¡°Something like that,¡± Kyle said. ¡°We don''t really have a king, but I''ll explain later...wait what about later? What happens to you when I make the wish?¡±


    ¡°Well I can''t have another master until you die,¡± Jenny said. ¡°The lamp is bonded to you, that''s automatic too. Most people send me back to the lamp and hide it someplace.¡±


    ¡°They just lock you away!?¡± Kyle gasped.


    ¡°I''m bonded to my master until they die,¡± Jenny shrugged. ¡°It makes sense. If everyone knew you had a genie they might try to kill you so they could use the lamp. And even when my masters were so powerful they didn''t really have to worry about it they were usually ashamed they had to ask a genie for help.¡±


    ¡°But that''s horrible!¡± Kevin gasped. ¡°They just abandon you after you help them?¡±


    ¡°Well yeah,¡± she said. ¡°It''s not like I''m a human or anything...¡±


    ¡°But you''re still a person!¡± he said. ¡°I mean I''ve only known you for a couple of minutes but even I can tell you''ve got it all.¡±


    ¡°Awww thank you!¡± the genie smiled. ¡°I can take off the shirt so you can see it all again if you want...¡±


    ¡°NOT what I meant!¡± Kyle said. ¡°I meant a personality, and free will, and that kind of stuff! You should get to...I dunno. Live. Look, once you grant my wishes...why not hang around? In the world? I promise not to seal you up in the lamp or anything.¡±


    ¡°That would be so amazing!¡± Jenny said. ¡°I never get to see what''s going on in the world! Could I really do that?¡±


    ¡°Yeah uh,¡± Kevin scratched his head. ¡°We might have to explain the pinky-purple skin and the pointy ears. There aren''t a lot of genies around anymore.¡±


    ¡°Once you make a wish I''ll be able to use minor magic,¡± Jenny said. ¡°I can''t magic up something solid for myself like clothes, but I could make it so I look human. I''ve done that once or twice. It was a long time ago though.¡±


    ¡°Great!¡± Kevin said. ¡°So all I have to do is say grant my wishes...¡±


    Kevin thought. It could all be a trick. She could still be dangerous and here to get him to wish for something bad, or to get him let her hurt him. But somehow he just couldn''t picture Jenny being like that. And if her story was true he hadto help her. Besides, the deepest wish of his heart...he couldn''t think of what it was, but something inside him was desperate to find out.


    ¡°Okay,¡± he said. ¡°Grant my wishes.¡±

 Chapter 3: Life Begins to Change

    ¡°Okay,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Grant my wishes.¡±


    It was the strangest moment of his life. As soon as he spoke he felt something shift. Like he was standing on ice that had just slid beneath him. Whatever happened next, he''d just made a choice that would change everything.


    ¡°Okay cool beans!¡± Jenny said, spreading her arms wide. ¡°Oh right, I forgot to tell you! When I do this don''t...¡±


    Jenny''s eyes glowed with piercing white light. Her whole body shimmered like a super speed effect in an anime, or like there was something wrong with her image display. For a second he looked at her and didn''t just see a beautiful woman he saw a whole universe in her outline, sparkling and dancing. He stared into the flickering stars and he was moving, flying inside of them. He passed burning suns and planets of boiling gas. He flew through nebula, and saw places where the curves of life gave way to angles. Then in a blink he was standing in a desert, scrubby trees all around him, and in front of him an enormous watch, the old fashioned kind.


    The face of the watch burst into a thousand pieces, shards of crystal erupting like a geyser while gears and springs and odd shaped pieces of metal floating high into the air. They spiraled around each other like a galaxy and floated back down, coming together in a whole new arrangement. The crystal reformed itself as well, as if there had never been a crack in it.


    Tick.


    And then Kyle was back, and there were soft things in his face again. This time they were covered with cloth. Jenny''s breasts again, he thought. He was lying on the floor of the shop''s back room, with his head in Jenny''s lap. She was saying something.


    ¡°Mmm mmmkrrr!¡± he mummbled into her chest.


    ¡°What?¡± she said, leaning back a little. He took a long, deep breath.


    ¡°I said I''m okay!¡± he sat up on the floor. ¡°What happened?¡±


    ¡°I¡±m so sorry Master!¡± Jenny said. ¡°I was trying to tell you not to look at me while I was granting the wishes! It means staring into the inner workings of the multiverse in a way the human mind was never meant to comprehend. But you''re still human and your brain didn''t explode, so....yay!¡±


    ¡°Yeah,¡± Kevin chuckled weakly. ¡°Yay. Look I hope it''s going to be a good long time before you have a next master, but...¡±


    ¡°Maybe I should mention that first?¡± Jenny chuckled. ¡°Uh...yeah.¡±


    ¡°Yeah,¡± Kevin agreed. ¡°So uh...what happened?¡±


    ¡°Well I think you didn''t exist there for a second,¡± Jenny said. ¡°And then you existed in every moment of possible time all at once, and then--¡±


    ¡°I meant with the wish,¡± Kevin said. ¡°Let''s just not talk about that other stuff for now, okay? I doubt my own existence enough already as it is.¡±


    ¡°I don''t know about the wish,¡± Jenny said. ¡°It might take a while to find out.¡±


    ¡°Okay,¡± Kyle said, standing up. ¡°So...I guess I''ll wait on that. Now, how about you? We''ve got a lot of problems to work out. You need a place to stay, you need...¡±


    Kyle looked down to once again find his hand resting on her breast, which still felt so warm and soft through the t-shirt....


    ¡°Ahh!¡± he said, pulling his hand away. ¡°I''m sorry, I didn''t mean to do it that time it just landed there!¡±


    ¡°It''s okay,¡± Jenny flushed. ¡°I don''t mind, I....¡±


    ¡°What the hell is all that noise back here?¡± His Grandfather said, pushing into the room. He stared at them. Kevin looked from his grandfather back to Jenny. He was surprised to see that Jenny really did look...human. Her purple hair was still the same color but her skin was a normal human skin tone. A little dusky, hinting that she was from the middle east somewhere...which now that he thought about it made sense. Kevin was relieved, until he realized what his grandfather saw was him on the ground shirtless with an extremely chesty girl lying on top of him. The old man blinked.


    ¡°Grandpa...¡± Kyle began.


    ¡°Excuse me for intruding,¡± the old man said, stepping out of the room.


    ¡°No wait! Grandpa! WAIIIIT....¡±


    Later that night, somewhere not too far away, something changed.


    It was just one of a lot of things that Kevin''s wish had changed. He wouldn''t understand most of them for a long time. But this was the one that helped him discover all the others. And it was such a little change. A tiny alteration to the world that shattered everything. The wingbeat of a butterfly that summons the storm. All that happened was a tiny piece of metal moved eighteen millimeters.


    That piece of metal happened to be in the engine of a moving car.


    The engine tore itself apart. The car, still moving, spun out wildly and careened off the road, smashing into a tree where it shattered into pieces. It didn''t explode like a hollywood movie, but the engine compartment did catch fire. It didn''t really need to explode, the whole care looked like a tootsie roll a little kid had grabbed and twisted. Nothing human could possibly have survived inside.


    The driver snarled and kicked the metal door apart to get out. He was just annoyed. There were not other cars on the road, so the hulking figure in the long brown trenchcoat and hat couldn''t ask anyone for a ride. Or demand it, really. He wasn''t an asking type of guy. But it was late, and dark, and no one was likely to come down this old road until morning.


    ¡°Figures,¡± he snarled, kicking the car. It flew into the air and landed a couple of yards away. ¡°Where am I? There''d better be a town nearby!¡±


    He looked around and found out he''d landed near a road sign. It read ¡°Rolling Hills, 3 miles.¡±


    ¡°Well that''s something,¡± he snarled. ¡°I shouldn''t get tootired in three miles.¡±


    His wings opened up through slits in the back of his coat. They were like dragonfly wings made of fire. They buzzed into action and he lifted off, flying towards the town.


    Unauthorized tale usage: if you spot this story on Amazon, report the violation.


    Evan walked up to the back door of the antique shop and knocked. He did that every morning. Kyle lived upstairs, in a set of rooms that was really way too big for one guy but his grandfather didn''t like living in town. Evan envied him and his big apartment, even if it was in the business district. He could see Kyle having all kinds of fun in there, if he could get the girls over to have it. He thought he''d probably know about it if his best friend got a girlfriend, but he was always suspicious.


    The door was opened by a pretty middle eastern girl with long black hair and largest pair of breasts Evan had ever seen.


    Like Kyle, they also were the first pair of breasts he had ever personally seen naked.


    ¡°Hi!¡± the girl said. ¡°I''m Jenny! It''s nice to meet you!¡±


    ¡°Gerpkt!¡± Evan said, just before he passed out.


    ¡°Well great,¡± Kyle said, looking at Evan sprawled out on the couch. ¡°He''s dead.¡±


    ¡°He is not!¡± Jenny said. ¡°He''s fine, he just fell over! I can''t figure out why.¡±


    They had carried Evan upstairs to the living room of Kyle''s apartment above the antique shop, which was really more like a small two story house. The furnishings were old, mismatched, and weirdly fancy. It was furnished entirely with unsold antiques his Grandfather bad brought up. Even the couch Evan was lying unconscious on was old, leather with brass.


    ¡°It''s a thing that happens to guys sometimes,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Didn''t I tell you stuff like this would happen if you walked around topless?¡±


    ¡°You did,¡± she said. ¡°But I didn''t think...oh, uh, oh....¡±


    ¡°Gah!¡± Kyle tugged his trecherous hands away from Jenny''s rack. ¡°Sorry about that. See though? It''s a deep seated weakness in the male brain. For a lot of guys its the nosebleeds. For me I guess my hands won''t stop...well, sorry. You should slap me when I do that, you know. Or something. I really can''t keep doing that.


    ¡°But you''re nice!¡± Jenny insisted. ¡°I don''t want to slap you."


    ¡°This culture gap takes a lot of getting used to,¡± Kyle said, silently resolving to do better. ¡°I guess we''d better wake him up. And explain the whole genie thing...¡±


    ¡°I don''t think you should do that,¡± Jenny said seriously.


    ¡°What?¡± Kyle said. ¡°Not even to Evan?¡±


    ¡°What if it turns out he''s not one of the people who got a wish granted?¡± Jenny said. ¡°He''ll be resentful and jealous. It could come between you and your friend.¡±


    ¡°Well...¡± Kyle scratched his chin. It was true, Evan could be really bratty sometimes. And resentful. And pouty. ¡°Well alright, just for now though. If you''re going to stick around I''ll have to tell him eventually. But for now, Grandpa''s story is gonna have to do.¡±


    Evan was surprised how well his grandfather had taken there suddenly being a genie in the house. ¡°When you work in antiques these things happen,¡± the old man had said, waving a hand dismissively. Kyle had really, really wanted him to elaborate but instead he''d worked on a cover story to let her live here, and even go to school with Kyle.


    ¡°Evan?¡± Kyle said, shaking his friend awake. ¡°Evan you okay?¡±


    ¡°I think so...¡± Evan said, sitting up and holding his head. ¡°I think I walked in on you having an orgy...¡±


    ¡°No Evan,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Jenny just opened the door before she had any clothes on. She''s...¡±


    ¡°Then there really was a girl!¡± Evan grabbed Kyle''s arm. ¡°I knew it! I knew you were having smutty filthy sexy times and not telling me! What the hell man! Share the wealth!¡±


    ¡°What!? No!¡± Kyle said. ¡°She''s a friend of my grandpa!¡±


    ¡°You mean that old man is...¡±


    ¡°No!¡± Kyle waved his hands. ¡°You''re getting me all mixed up! She''s coming to stay here for a while. She''s the daughter of a friend of my grandpa''s! Someone he knows through the antique business.¡±


    And there it was, the big cover story they''d come up with. He even said he''d work it so she could attend school, but Kyle didn''t know exactly what he had planned.


    ¡°And she''s staying here,¡± Evan said. ¡°With you.¡±


    ¡°Well...¡± Kevin shrugged. ¡°Yeah.¡±


    ¡°You bastard!¡± Evan said, jumping on him and trying to punch him in the face.


    ¡°What the hell!?¡± Kyle said, struggling with his friend. ¡°Get off!¡±


    The two of them rolled on the ground back and forth between the TV and the couch.


    ¡°Getting to spend all night in here with those tits!¡± Evan said. ¡°Die!¡±


    ¡°A tit is a kind of bird,¡± Jenny said, her voice cutting through the argument. ¡°We don''t have any tits.¡±


    Kyle and Evan looked up. Kyle had run out and bought clothes for her last night. Not a lot, just some sweatpants and t-shirts, stuff where it could be baggy and not matter. But even the baggy shirt couldn''t really hide the fact that yes, as long as Jenny was here there would definitely be tits.


    ¡°That''s not what he means,¡± Kyle said, getting up. He was starting to learn her language spell wasn''t perfect. ¡°He''s talking about your breasts.¡±


    ¡°Ohhh a synonim!¡± Jenny said. ¡°Kyle likes my breasts! He grabbed them one time when he wasn''t paying attention.¡±


    Evan''s eyes became lasers of death.


    ¡°And you''re his best friend right?¡± Jenny said. ¡°It''s so nice to meet you! I''m sure we''ll be great friends!¡±


    She pulled Evan in for a hug and Evan''s eyes lost focus. It was, thankfully, enough to derail the fight. There were apologies and half apologies, the three of them grabbed their things¡ªnot that Jenny really had things¡ªand headed off to school. They walked into the building and into the classroom where his homeroom teacher, Ms. Applewhite, was already waiting at the front of the room. It took them a second to notice her, because she was behind the desk.


    Ms. Applewhite had been blessed with a curvaceous body and a gorgeous face, but almost no height. Her head came up to Kyle''s chest, so if she wasn''t looking up all he saw was a mass of bushy brown hair. If she did look up she looked pretty, despite her enormous glasses.


    ¡°There you are Mr Ardman,¡± she said, no-nonsense as usual. ¡°And this is Ms. Ragbah? The principle left your paperwork right here. I''ve added a packet you can use to catch up in my class. Now if Mr. Ardman and Mr. Beck will just sit down you can take a moment to introduce yourself.¡±


    ¡°Okay!¡± Jenny said cheerfully, taking the envelope from her new teacher. ¡°Thank you!¡±


    So there it was. All the paperwork was sorted out, and Jenny would be transferring into his class. It made Kyle wonder even more about his grandfather, and what he knew about magic. How did he know how to set this up so quickly? Was there a lot going on Kevin didn''t know about? But he didn''t have time to worry about that, because everyone in the class was staring.


    They were staring at the new girl, yes, but they were also staring at him because they''d walked in together. It made Kyle uncomfortable. He wasn''t used to people staring at him. In fact, he wasn''t used to people noticing him at all. Well okay, Trevor there in the back was a friend, so him noticing him was alright. And he''d been used to Betty looking at him like a science experiment since forever. But what was up with Tanya?


    Tanya Myrdin was the most beautiful girl in the class. She had skin like dark chocolate and piercing blue eyes, beautiful enough on their own before you considered her tall, athletic body and long, glistening dark hair. Her face looked like something out of a magazine. She always wore concealing clothes, long sleeve shirt and pants, but they fit her composed, almost icy aesthetic better than something revealing would have. And for the first time Kyle could remember, she was staring right at him. Those glistening blue eyes were suddenly like lasers, he was afraid they''d stab him right through the soul. It made him shiver a little.


    ¡°Kyle,¡± Evan said. ¡°Come on.¡±


    ¡°Oh,¡± Kyle nodded. ¡°Right.¡± He followed Evan back into the classroom.


    ¡°Make sure I can sit next to you!¡± Jenny called after him, causing the class to start whispering and muttering to themselves. A few of the guys started looking daggers at him. Evan was one of them. Kyle sighed and picked a desk next to two empty ones. Eric took the far empty desk, still glaring at him.


    ¡°Uh, hello everyone!¡± Jenny said, waving. It wasn''t a polite little wave either. It was a massive shake of her arm that made her whole body shudder. And jiggle. The eyes of nearly everyone in the room were drawn hypnotically to her chest. ¡°My name is Jenny Ragbah, and I''m from a country called Uzbedi. My English is pretty good but I just arrived in this country yesterday, so uh, please be patient with me if I''m a little weird okay?¡±


    Kyle scratched his head. Uzbedi? Where did she get that? But then there were a lot of countries, how likely was someone to think they knew all of them? Except, out of the corner of his eye, he saw movement. Tanya had stopped looking at him to look up at Jenny in shock. Then that frightening laser-gaze turned back in Kyle''s direction.


    ¡°Thank you Ms. Ragbah,¡± Ms. Applewhite said. ¡°Now if you''ll just--¡±


    ¡°How do you know Kyle and Evan?¡± Betty asked. For such a quiet girl most of the time her voice could really carry when she wanted it to.


    ¡°Oh!¡± Jenny said. ¡°I know this one...I mean, because I''m staying with Kyle! My parents are friends of his Grandfather in the antique business!¡±


    That got a reaction out of the class. As Jenny came to sit down beside him there was all kinds of murmuring. He thought he heard a few quiet death threats. Was this what getting noticed was like?

 Chapter 4: Intrigue and Chicken Nuggets

    Kevin was relieved when the lunch bell rang. Normally he''d walk to lunch with Evan, but Evan was off somewhere and Betty wasn''t around either so he wound up walking alone with Jenny, past more of the ubiquitous posters for the spring formal.


    ¡°That was really interesting and fun!¡± Jenny said as the picked up their trays. ¡°Especially the history part. The math was all stuff I know, and I can''t quite follow the literature things yet, but I had no idea the world had gotten so interesting while I was away! Once I get my history textbook I''m going to read the whole thing.¡±


    ¡°Is this super smartness a genie power?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°I don''t know,¡± Jenny said. ¡°I haven''t met too many other genies. And so far as I know none of them ever went to school. Do they have that food you made for me last night here? The uhm, the Ramen? It was quite good.¡±


    ¡°Looks like they have meatloaf surprise and chicken nuggets,¡± Kyle said. ¡°If I were you I''d stick to the chicken nuggets.¡±


    ¡°Why?¡± Jenny said. ¡°Is Meat Loaf a bad thing?¡±


    ¡°Actually I like meatloaf,¡± Kyle said. ¡°It''s the surprise I''m worried about.¡±


    They filled their trays and walked back to the table.


    ¡°What was all that about being from Uzbedi?¡± He asked her as they say down. ¡°Aren''t you worried someone will look up a country that doesn''t exist?¡±


    ¡°But it does exist!¡± Jenny said. ¡°I really am from Uzbedi.¡±


    ¡°Uzbedi,¡± Betty said, putting her tray down on the table beside Kyle and taking out her smart phone. ¡°I had to look it up. Small country in west Asia, near Turkey. Has no coastline, population of only six or seven million. Not very friendly to tourists, but because of all the ruins within their borders they have a bustling export business in artifacts and antiques. I was forced to look it up. It is apparently an ancient and prosperous but obscure country, much like Luxembourg.¡±


    ¡°What''s a Luxembourg?¡±


    ¡°Precisely,¡± Betty said.


    ¡°Oh my fault,¡± Kyle said, a little relieved Jenny had said she was from a real country. And if the country was so ancient maybe she really was from there. It occurred to him he didn''t know anything about her past. Well how easy was it to ask? A problem for later. ¡°Jenny this is my friend Betty. Betty, this is Jenny.¡±


    ¡°It is a pleasure to meet you,¡± Betty said, adjusting her glasses.


    ¡°It''s nice for me too!¡± Jenny beamed.


    ¡°I was wondering if you could educate me at all on Uzbedi at some point,¡± Betty said. ¡°Such an exotic location might be useful for my current project.¡±


    ¡°I dunno,¡± Jenny said cautiously. ¡°It''s been a really, really long time since I''ve been back there.¡±


    ¡°Ah,¡± Betty nodded. ¡°I see. I suppose you traveled often with your parents and their work in the antiques business.¡±


    ¡°Something like that,¡± Kyle said. ¡°I think she might be a bigger help with, uh, the ancient history of Uzbedi.¡±


    ¡°That would be interesting as well,¡± Betty said.


    ¡°Oh I''d be happy too!¡± Jenny said. ¡°Let''s see...well, the kingdom was founded when the Sorcerer Lord K''vardoz claimed a piece of land sacred to Vgraa Shumdi, God of Unholy Earth, and battled him to purify it so mortal races could live there...¡±


    Kyle slapped his hands over his face. What kind of ancient history was this? Sorcerer lords and unholy gods and wait...wait...she was a genie. A genie was telling this story what if all this was legit!?Kyle was beginning to think the world was a much more complicated place than he''d thought it was yesterday morning.


    ¡°Ah!¡± Betty said, pulling out a notebook. ¡°I understand! You''re a student of mythology! This is even better than history!¡±


    ¡°Mythology? But you said...¡± Jenny started, but Kyle cut her off.


    ¡°Yes, Jenny''s really big on mythology!¡± Kevin said, forcing a huge smile on to his face.


    ¡°Ohhh right!¡± Jenny nodded, finally remembering they were keeping magic a secret. That had confused her a little because last time she was out of the lamp she said everybody knew about magic, but she''d shrugged and gone along with it.


    ¡°What are you guys talking about?¡± Trevor asked as he and Evan walked up to the table. Trevor sat down next to Jenny, and Evan walked around and sat next to Kyle. That put Kyle in between Evan and Betty, where he hated being, but there wasn''t much he could do about it without getting awkward.


    ¡°I was talking about the history¡ªI mean, the mythology of Uzbedi!¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°Oh not history,¡± Trevor groaned, hanging his head in his hands. ¡°It''s my worst subject. I think my brain is fried on it this morning already.¡±


    ¡°Oh, this is Trevor,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°Nice to meet you!¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°You too,¡± Trevor nodded. ¡°Hey Kyle, why didn''t you tell us you were getting a roommate?¡±


    ¡°Yeah I was wondering that too,¡± Evan said. ¡°I mean not telling us is all part of you being a filthy traitor, but still.¡±


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    ¡°I didn''t know,¡± Kyle said, glad he could be mostly honest. ¡°I got home yesterday and she kind of...showed up.¡±


    ¡°I bet you didn''t complain though,¡± Evan waggled his eyebrows.


    ¡°Evan,¡± Kyle sighed.


    ¡°What?¡± Evan said with mock innocence. ¡°I was just thinking you''re all alone in that house at night and now you have company.¡±


    ¡°That''s not what you meant.¡±


    ¡°Company with an enormous rack!¡± Evan grinned. Kyle winced. There it was again. He wished Evan would just...


    Chill with it sometimes. If he was being completely honest, Evan''s outright lewdness made Kyle feel guilty. Guilty for being attracted to Jenny himself, guilty for thoughts shooting through his head not too different from what Evan was saying. So as uncomfortable as the way Evan talked made him, he didn''t think he had a right to really condemn him. But still, Jenny was right there. Talking about her body didn''t seem to upset her, and alright Evan was socially awkward. Kyle was too. But still, they''d only just met Jenny.


    But while he was thinking about that, Kyle had forgotten Evan wasn''t the only one at the table who wasn''t socially normal.


    ¡°Yes,¡± Betty nodded. ¡°You have a truly impressive set of mammaries. I noticed most of the boys and a good portion of the girls in class having their eyes drawn to them repeatedly during the lesson, myself included. Would it be possible for me to get a picture of you nude? For research purposes.¡±


    ¡°Betty!¡± Kyle said, despairing.


    ¡°I don''t mind,¡± Jenny said. ¡°But I don''t know if I have time to sit for a portrait--¡±


    ¡°OKAY changing topics immediately!¡± Kyle said. ¡°Actually, maybe not completely, because I''ve been dying to get this answer for a while. Betty, what the hell is it you''re researching, exactly?¡±


    ¡°My project,¡± Betty said.


    ¡°Yeah but what is it?¡± Kyle pressed. ¡°I remember that time we were in fourth grade and your project was to breed hamsters, and the whole school got overrun with hamsters. But now we''re always seeing you with those hentai books and...¡±


    Evan let out a long, low whistle. A wolf whistle, like out of old cartoons. Kyle was a little surprised Evan didn''t just turn into a wolf. It derailed the entire conversation, as everyone else at the table tried to catch up with Evan''s thought process.


    A horrifying thought at the best of times.


    ¡°Aha,¡± Betty said, turning her back on Kyle to look at Evan. ¡°You are making the sound of arousal. A primitive mating call, really.¡±


    ¡°You bet I am,¡± Evan said, gesturing to a girl with long golden hair cascading down her back like a waterfall. ¡°Goldie Goodman.¡±


    ¡°Who''s that?¡± Jenny asked.


    ¡°One of Rolling Hills Highschool''s three princesses,¡± Evan said. ¡°There are three super hot, super rich girls who come here, and all three of them compete for the top spots in grades. Ammeline Trent, I haven''t seen her yet today. You already saw Tanya Myrden in class earlier. Goldie over there is the one who eats up the math department. Head of the chess club, too.¡±


    ¡°Stop staring,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°I can look,¡± Evan told him.


    ¡°Not like that you can''t.¡±


    ¡°It''s only illegal if I''m doing it through a wall, not out here in public.¡±


    A shadow fell over the table. Entirely unexpectedly. Lunch wasn''t really a likely time for bully activity, not at Rolling Hills high school. And all their friends were already there. One of Trevor''s screaming girl mobs would have just trampled the entire table. So everyone was confused when someone else walked up, and even more confused when they saw who it was.


    ¡°You!¡± Tanya Myrden said, pointing to Kyle. ¡°I need to talk to you. Right now. In private.¡±


    ¡°Uh...¡± Kyle looked around. Everyone shrugged. ¡°Jenny, are you going to be alright?¡±


    ¡°I''ll be fine!¡± Jenny said. ¡°I have lots of friends here, right?¡±


    ¡°Sure,¡± Kyle said. Well, she''d probably be okay. ¡°Switch seats with Trevor so you don''t end up next to Evan.


    ¡°Hey!¡± Evan said.


    ¡°I''ll be right back,¡± Kyle told her. ¡°Whatever this is about.¡±


    He got up and followed Tanya out of the cafeteria. Trevor, Evan, and Betty exchanged looks.


    ¡°What''s up with him lately?¡± Trevor asked.


    ¡°I dunno,¡± Evan grumbled. ¡°I bet he''s keeping secrets from us. Why wouldn''t he tell me how to get all the hot girls out of nowhere if he figured it out? I''m his best friend!¡±


    ¡°Perhaps we should discuss this later,¡± Betty said. ¡°Jenny appears to be exhibiting extremely odd behavior.¡±


    Jenny''s eyes had glazed over. Little stars sparkled in them as she sat completely still, a chicken nugget hanging half out of her mouth. Without the rest of her body moving the nugget slid up into her mouth and she bit down, chewing and swallowing it.


    ¡°What was that?¡± she said softly. Almost like she was in a library, or a church. ¡°What was that food I just ate?¡±


    ¡°It''s a chicken nugget,¡± Evan said. ¡°Haven''t you ever had a chicken nugget before?¡±


    ¡°No...¡± Jenny said, reaching out for another one.


    ¡°Wanna try dipping it in sauce?¡± Trevor said. ¡°You''ve got honey mustard and bbq right there, in the little cups.¡±


    ¡°Oh yes,¡± Jenny said. ¡°Sauce...¡±


    She grabbed a second nugget dunked one end in each cup. Jenny could tell a whole new adventure of wonder and discovery had begun.


    Kevin, meanwhile, was wondering when he would discover what all this was about. She led him out of the building and into the same alley where Danny had chased him the day before. When they were there in the dark, she whirled on him. The alley was kind of tight, so they wound up pressed extremely close together. For a second he wondered if she was going to try and make out with him, but there was nothing romantic in her expression.


    ¡°The first thing I need to know,¡± she said, completely oblivious to their distracting closeness, ¡°Is should I be talking to you, or your grandfather?¡±


    ¡°I-I don''t know,¡± Kevin said. ¡°What do you want?¡±


    ¡°I want the lamp,¡± she said, and all of a sudden Kevin wasn''t distracted by juvenile fantasies anymore. Panic shot through him, but he made himself calm down.


    ¡°What lamp?¡± he said, surprised at how calm his own voice was.


    ¡°Don''t give me that!¡± Tanya snapped. ¡°You''ve got a pretty good poker face, but don''t think I''m stupid. We track the lamp to your shop, and now you show up with an Uzbedi girl this morning out of nowhere? Stop fooling around. How much have the Uzbedis offered you?¡±


    ¡°I didn''t even know about Uzbedi until I met Jenny,¡± Kyle said. ¡°I don''t think I ever even met anyone else from Uzbedi!¡±


    ¡°That doesn''t answer my question!¡± Tanya said, leaning in closer. Her chest pressed against his and all of a sudden Kyle was distracted again. He slapped the thoughts away. Dammit, this was important. Even if he didn''t have any idea what was going on. ¡°I didn''t ask how long you knew her. I want to know how much the Uzbedi government offered you!¡±


    ¡°I have no idea what you''re talking about!¡± Kyle said. Tanya made a sound that was part grunt, part groan, part snarl, and all exasperation.


    ¡°Look just tell me so I know how high I have to go to make you a better offer!¡± Tanya said. ¡°Whatever they said they''d give you, I''ll double it.¡±


    ¡°No one made me any offers!¡± Kyle shouted. ¡°I don''t know how else to say it, I really don''t have any idea what you''re talking about!¡±


    Tanya glared at him.


    ¡°Fine!¡± she said, turning away and walking off down the alley. As she turned her chest dragged him over and slammed Kyle into the dirt. While he was picking himself up, she looked back. ¡°But take my advice, Kyle Anderman. Don''t trust the Uzbedis. They''re not the paragons of justice they like to think they are.¡±


    ¡°I wouldn''t know,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Because I''ve never met them.¡±


    ¡°Right,¡± Tanya shook her head. ¡°Look if you''re going to sell it, get rid of it quick. We''d rather not involve the Uzbedi''s at all, and we really can make you a better offer, but we''ll work with them if we have to. Just remember there''s plenty of interested parties who won''t be so polite, not when the prize is something as powerful as the last genie.¡±


    And with that flabbergasting exit line she stormed off, leaving Kevin watching her back disappear down the alleyway totally confused.

 Chapter 5: Rough Chemistry

    He arrived back in the dining hall to chaos, because Jenny had eaten all the chicken nuggets.


    Not just her own chicken nuggets, not just his chicken nuggets, but every chicken nugget she could reach. When he got there Trevor and Evan were holding her arms to keep her from charging the lunch counter and claiming the nuggets as her own. The lunch lady was holding a ladle and a big metal spatula up like weapons, ready to repel the assault if she should break free. Betty was watching the chaos, scribbling furiously in a notepad.


    ¡°What happened?¡± he asked.


    ¡°It was an extremely fascinating display,¡± Betty scribbled. ¡°Jenny was apparently entirely unfamiliar with chicken nuggets, and has discovered an extreme addiction to them in an extremely short time. I believe the taste of chemically breaded chicken was a flavor discovery so great it has completely overwhelmed her senses and reason. Not the first victim of Robert C. Baker''s glorious innovation.¡±


    ¡°Who?¡± Kyle blinked.


    ¡°Inventor of the chicken nugget,¡± Betty explained.


    ¡°Ah.¡± Kyle said. ¡°Well I suppose I''d better get her. We''re all off to science lab.¡±


    He walked up to Jenny and put a hand on her arm.


    ¡°Jenny?¡± he said. ¡°Jenny? Come on. We need to go now.¡±


    ¡°But there are nuggets...¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°I''ll get you a big plate of them for dinner okay?¡± Kevin told her. ¡°But for now we have to go to chemistry.¡±


    ¡°Oh...okay,¡± Jenny said, calming down. The lunch ladies began to cautiously lower their alert level. ¡°What''s a chemistry?¡±


    ¡°Ohhhh!¡± Jenny said a few minutes later, when they were all filed into the science lab. ¡°It''s alchemy!¡±


    ¡°Sort of I guess?¡± Kyle said. The school lab was a white room with a row of white counters, each one set in a station that had various pipes sticking out to attack equipment too. Pretty nice as high school science labs went. Everyone had a station where they worked on their projects while Ms. Saunders stood at the front of the class, her athletic frame draped in a lab coat. Draped because it would be hard, hard pressed to close around her chest. ¡°I mean I suppose they''re kind of the same thing.¡±


    Everyone was paired up, like usual for class. Kyle''s lab partner hardly ever attended, but he was used to doing the assignments by himself. And today he had Jenny to help him...even if he wasn''t sure the excitable genie girl ought to be handling chemicals. Trevor and Betty were partnered together. Kyle rembered Betty had tried to arrange it so she and Evan were lab partners, but somehow she''d ended up with Trevor and Eric had ended up with Ammeline Trent.


    The schools third princess was tall, blonde, and beautiful. He hair hung in drill like spirals from either side of her head. She had blue eyes, pale white skin, a tendency to wear long dresses and expensive makeup (of course she had goggles over the makeup right now) and a superior attitude that drove a lot of people nuts. Still she wasn''t all bad. And the problems she and Evan had been having all year were, well, Evan''s fault.


    ¡°Alright peasant,¡± Ammeline said, looking carefully at the blue liquid in her bottle. ¡°I think we''re supposed to mix this with....are you touching me again, peasant!?¡±


    ¡°It was an accident, an accident!¡± Evan said, raising his hands and waving them in the air.


    ¡°This is an important assignment!¡± Ammeline glowered at him. ¡°And I will not sacrifice my perfect grades because some grubby little peasant was too busy focusing on my gorgeous figure to do the work!¡±


    ¡°Maybe I don''t like being called a peasant!¡± Evan yelled back.


    ¡°Excuse me,¡± Ammeline said. ¡°If you''d rather not be reminded I won''t bring it up again, you grubby little pervert.¡±


    ¡°Should we do something about that?¡± Jenny said, adjusting her goggles on her face again. ¡°Hey, these are fun!¡±


    ¡°No everybody''s used to it by now,¡± Kyle sighed. ¡°Any second now she''ll storm off and...there she goes.¡±


    Ammeline was storming away from the experiment, though Kyle knew by now she''d have done anything that couldn''t wait first even with Evan getting so grabby. But unlike normal, after she came back from calming herself down in the hall, she walked up to Kyle and Jenny.


    ¡°Handsy peasant,¡± Ammeline grumbled, then turned her attention to Jenny. ¡°I don''t believe we''ve been formally introduced. I am Ammeline Trent. Lover of beauty, of art, a genuine American princess...¡±


    ¡°I was confused about that before too,¡± Jenny scratched her head. ¡°Princesses. I thought America didn''t have royal titles. Did I have that wrong?¡±


    ¡°No you had it right,¡± Kyle sighed.


    ¡°Ahaha!¡± Ammeline barked with a superior laugh. ¡°Political power may have to wait until I run for senate, but in every way that matters I am truly a princess! And interstate high school fencing champion!¡±


    ¡°Why are you proudest of that one?¡± Kyle asked, but Ammeline ignored him.


    ¡°And you are my new rival!¡± Ammeline said, pointing at Jenny. ¡°I declare it!¡±


    And it was a grand declaration, too. Kyle could almost see rays of light bursting from her body, it was so grand.


    ¡°What!?¡± Jenny said, her face flushing as she waved her arms in flustered panic. ¡°But I can''t be your rival!¡±


    ¡°Too late, I declared it!¡± Ammeline said triumphantly. ¡°From this day forward, you are my rival by royal decree!¡±


    ¡°But...but...¡± Jenny stammered, ¡°but I don''t even know how to fence!¡±


    ¡°Ah,!¡± Ammeline put a hand to her mouth. ¡°Ahahahaha...yes, I''m sorry. I see your confusion. I suppose that was, my, er, error. I do not intend for us to become rivals in fencing.¡±


    ¡°Oh,¡± Jenny said. ¡°But what kind of rivals are we going to be then?¡±


    ¡°Why rivals for the title of most beautiful girl in school of course!¡± Ammeline said proudly. ¡°You''re the first worthy challenger I''ve had since freshman year!¡±


    ¡°But I don''t wanna be rivals like that!¡± Jenny said. ¡°I mean okay, I think you''re really pretty! I dunno if I''m as pretty as you...¡±


    ¡°Going the humble route?¡± Ammeline said. ¡°A sound tactic, but one I could never employ. My beauty just demands to be praised!¡±


    ¡°But there''s a lot of pretty people around here!¡± Jenny said. ¡°I mean you''re pretty, that Tanya girl is pretty, Betty''s pretty...and anyway, isn''t it kind of uh, based on what the person, uh, looking thinks...¡±


    ¡°You mean beauty is in the eye of the beholder?¡± Kevin suggested.


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    ¡°Right!¡± Jenny said. ¡°Yes!¡±


    ¡°Ahahahaha...maybe that''s true,¡± Ammeline said. ¡°But if we''re doing quotations, let me say that my eyes are truly like the sun, and I''ve got a damasked rose in each of my cheeks!¡±


    ¡°What does that mean!?¡± Jenny stammered, spirals swirling in her eyes from confusion and panic.


    ¡°A-HA!¡± Ammeline said. ¡°And a win for me!¡±


    ¡°Huh?¡± Jenny blinked. He could almost see a question mark floating over her head. ¡°What do you mean?¡±


    ¡°A girl trying to take my spot should know her Shakespeare!¡± Ammeline said, pointing at Jenny again. ¡°Our battle has begun, and first blood to me!¡±


    ¡°Ammeline?¡± Eva called out. ¡°This next part needs two people.¡±


    ¡°We will clash again my rival!¡± Ammeline declared. ¡°Of course I intend to win, but do try and make it interesting for me, ahahahaha...¡±


    ¡°What just happened?¡± Jenny asked, clinging to Kyle''s arm.


    ¡°She''s just a little crazy is all,¡± Kevin sighed.


    ¡°Okay,¡± Jenny said. ¡°But she''s gonna come at me with a spear!¡±


    It took Kyle a second to work that one out.


    ¡°Shakespeare was a writer,¡± Kyle said. ¡°He wrote plays mostly. He''s the most famous writer who ever lived. I actually know a lot about him because...well I like reading, and I guess living in the antique shop I''m used to older stuff. We actually quote him all the time when we just talk normally, he was that important. He basically wrote a lot of what we just...say, every day. Most people don''t actually bother to read his stuff anymore though, but some people see it as kind of a status thing to know your Shakespeare.¡±


    ¡°Another thing I missed out on huh?¡± Jenny said, suddenly looking sad. ¡°From what everybody said I must have been in that lamp for hundreds and hundreds of years before anyone found me. I missed so much.¡±


    ¡°I''ll help you catch up,¡± Kyle promised. ¡°If you''re interested in Shakespeare we''ve got the books at home.¡±


    ¡°Really!?¡± Jenny said eagerly.


    ¡°Really,¡± Kyle promised, smiling. She was just so cute when she smiled like that. Beauty might be in the eye of the beholder, but he was having a pretty good time beholding Jenny right about then. ¡°Now come on, Evan''s right this part really does take two people.¡±


    Coach Saunders walked back into the classroom.


    ¡°Alright everyone!¡± she called out. ¡°What step are we all on? Looks like fourteen, good. Okay, we''re going to get up to step twenty one today, and then it has to sit for a while. Four hours is enough but we''re going to leave it overnight, it''ll be fine. So if anyone has any questions don''t hesitate to ask.¡±


    There were a few questions, but Kyle and Jenny didn''t need to ask any. Mostly they spent class carefully following the steps and occasionally getting distracted by Ammeline yelling at Evan for...being Evan. They finished step 21, put the beaker full of blue green liquid in a stand to rest overnight, and breathed a sigh of relief.


    ¡°That was interesting,¡± Jenny said when class was over. ¡°But I didn''t really understand it.¡±


    ¡°You came in a little late,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Don''t worry.¡±


    Trevor and Betty came over while Kyle and Jenny were packing their station up.


    ¡°So,¡± Trevor grinned. ¡°Looks like you have a rival!¡±


    ¡°But I don''t know what I''m supposed to do with a rival!¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°Well based on my research there are three possible alternatives,¡± Betty said, adjusting her glasses. ¡°The first path is to crystallize a deep, bitter hatred for each other in the core of your hearts until the final confrontation comes, most likely on a high place. And most likely with a great deal of fire. In that confrontation, one of you dies, finally ending the rivalry forever.¡±


    ¡°I don''t want to do that!¡± Jenny gasped.


    ¡°The second option is for you two to grow closer over your many battles,¡± Betty said. ¡°To achieve a grudging respect for each other in your constant clashes that grows, eventually, into friendship.¡±


    ¡°That one sounds better!¡± Jenny said. ¡°But I don''t know about all those battles. What''s the third option?¡±


    ¡°It''s just like the second option, but...¡± Betty adjusted her glasses again. The light made them look like flat panes of white. ¡°...it ends in extremely vigorous sexual intercourse.¡±


    The entire group fell silent.


    I will not nosebleed and pass out like an anime perv, Kyle told himself. I am not Evan. I will not nosebleed and pass out like an anime perv, I will not...


    ¡°Couldn''t we just skip all the fighting and be friends?¡± Jenny said. ¡°Or skip right to the sex part?¡±


    That did it. Kyle felt his head go light and he was down. He was woken up a few seconds after by Trevor and Betty. There noses were bleeding too.


    ¡°You were hit pretty hard there,¡± Trevor said. ¡°Can''t say I blame you but...¡±


    ¡°Are you okay?¡± Jenny said. She looked so concerned Kyle had to fight not to burst out laughing.


    ¡°I''m fine,¡± he said. ¡°This is just...a thing that happens. And I didn''t know you were into girls.¡±


    Jenny looked a little confused, but before they could explore the discussion any further Ammeline stormed over. She had packed up like everyone else, and had a backpack on her back.


    ¡°What was that awful geyser of blood I just saw spray across the classroom?¡± the haughty girl asked. ¡°And why are all your faces bloody?¡±


    ¡°Ammeline has just revealed to us that she is a lesbian,¡± Betty said, adjusting her glasses. ¡°The mental image conjured was more than Kyle''s system could handle.¡±


    ¡°Hmph!¡± Ammeline sniffed. ¡°Boys. Evan''s like working with an octopus, he keeps ¡°accidentally¡± bumping into me! I''d report him if hitting him in the head for trying wasn''t so satisfying. But they''re all perverts. You''re Evan''s friend, right?¡±


    Ammeline glared at him and Trevor. It reminded him of Tanya''s cold laser eyes.


    ¡°W-well yeah,¡± Kyle said. ¡°But I swear I''m not like that...¡±


    ¡°Is he?¡± Ammeline turned to Jenny. ¡°You live with him, don''t you? Has he gotten all grabby?¡±


    ¡°No!¡± Jenny said. ¡°Well, he kinda grabbed my breasts one time but it was an accident and he kept apologizing. And I kind of liked it!¡±


    ¡°What''s this now?¡± Trevor grinned. Betty adjusted her glasses, turning them into panes of white once again.


    ¡°Yes please,¡± Betty said. ¡°Do elaborate. This is vital for my research. Though I thought you said you were a lesbian...¡±


    ¡°I never said that!¡± Jenny said. ¡°I just said I wouldn''t mind having sex with Ammeline!¡±


    Silence fell like a brick on concrete.


    ¡°Ah,¡± Ammeline said, apparently not having any other idea what to say, backing slowly away from the group. Her face was flushed bright red. ¡°Well, I mean, I''m flattered of course but I...I mean, I''ve never even considered...you know...girls, I mean I''ve, uhm...I don''t...¡±


    She backed into the lab table and the edge of it slid under her backside. Her face went from red with embarrassment to scarlet with fury in less than a second,


    ¡°Evan this is not the time you filthy peasant!¡± she snarled, whirling around and swinging her backpack like a club. Evan looked up in surprise from where he''d been packing his backpack way across the classroom.


    ¡°What did I do now!?¡± he asked, totally oblivious.


    Ammeline just had time to look shocked before her backpack slammed into their lab project, sending the beaker flying across the room. It landed, luckily enough, in one of the class''s many sinks before it spilled out, their entire day of work and assignment for next class gone in a second.


    ¡°What did you do!?¡± Evan yelled, running to the sink. ¡°It...it''s gone! It''s all gone!¡±


    ¡°B-b-but....¡± Ammeline stammered. ¡°He''s been...I felt...my ass...I didn''t mean...¡± she looked back at them. ¡°I-it was a reasonable assumption, right? I mean...I...I couldn''t have...¡±


    She fell to her hands and knees and it was like a dark cloud hovered over her and everyone else in the room faded away until she floated alone on and endless swirling galaxy of dark despair.


    ¡°No there''s no excusing it...and in front of my rival...it is all my own fault and I have been completely...defeated....¡±


    ¡°Now what are we supposed to do?¡± Evan said irritably, looking at the spot where their project had been moments before. ¡°It''s completely ruined!¡±


    ¡°Maybe not,¡± Kyle said. ¡°If you guys ran and got permission you could probably come back and use the lab later tonight. She said it needs at least six hours right? If you come back and do all the steps again, it''ll still have time to sit and be ready for class in the morning.¡±


    ¡°And I happen to know Coach Saunders always stays late so she could be officially monitoring you!¡± Trevor clapped his hands together. ¡°Yeah it could work!¡±


    ¡°And we''ll all come help!¡± Jenny said cheerfully, looking back at the others. ¡°Right?¡±


    ¡°Uh...sure, why not?¡± Kyle shrugged. ¡°We can come help.¡±


    ¡°Thank you,¡± Ammeline said, looking at them all with big puppy eyes. ¡°Thank all of you!¡±


    ¡°If we''re going to do this we better go find Coach Saunder''s now,¡± Evan said.


    ¡°Yes,¡± Ammeline nodded. ¡°Come along, peasant.¡±


    ¡°I don''t want to hear that from you right nOOOOWWW!¡±


    ¡°Then keep your hands to yourself, peasant!¡±


    Trevor, Betty, Kyle and Jenny watched them leave.


    ¡°Well,¡± Trevor said. ¡°I guess I''ll see you guys here after school then.¡±


    ¡°Yes,¡± Betty nodded, watching Evan and Ammeline leave. ¡°I suppose so.¡±


    They broke up then to go to their next classes. Jenny and Kyle walked away down the hall together.


    ¡°Jenny?¡± he said. ¡°There''s something I ought to tell you.¡±


    He told her about Tanya, and what she''d said. About the Uzbedi government, and about Jenny possibly being the last genie.


    ¡°I mean of course she didn''t know you were a genie when she said it,¡± Kyle said. ¡°I just thought you ought to know.¡±


    ¡°Thanks,¡± Jenny said thoughtfully. ¡°I don''t know. If it''s been so long since the last time I was out of lamp, anything could have happened. I mean Uzbedi still exists, but it could be completely different from how I remember now.¡±


    ¡°I''m sorry,¡± Kyle said. ¡°It sounds lonely!¡±


    ¡°I''m not lonely!¡± Jenny said. ¡°I was for a while, only meeting people every couple of dozen years. But I''ve got you now right Kyle? And I made so many new friends today! I''m so glad you said I could walk around outside of the lamp!¡±


    Kyle smiled, but before he could respond a pair of shadows fell over them. Their path was blocked by Danny and Barry. The two bullies loomed in the hallway.


    ¡°Are these more friends?¡± Jenny asked.


    ¡°No,¡± Kyle said. ¡°No, they''re really not.¡±

 Chapter 6: Signs of Wishes Granted

    Danny and Barry stood in the hallway in front of them, leering.


    ¡°You been looking pretty happy walking around with the new girl,¡± Danny said with an ugly smile on his face.


    ¡°But she''s way too hot for a guy like you,¡± Barry said, his own smile just as horrible. ¡°You wouldn''t know how to handle her.¡±


    ¡°Right,¡± Danny nodded. ¡°So we''ve decided to take the whole big responsibility off your hands.¡±


    ¡°I don''t think I like these people very much,¡± Jenny said, stepping a little bit behind Kyle.


    ¡°Look you''re new to the country so let me explain,¡± Benny said. ¡°Guys like Kyle are what we call losers. A loser can''t show a girl like you a good time.¡±


    ¡°Guys like us can though,¡± Danny said, reaching out and grabbing Jenny''s arm. ¡°Come on, lemme show you.¡±


    ¡°Stop that,¡± Jenny said. ¡°Let go of me!¡±


    ¡°Come on relax,¡± Danny said. ¡°I just wanna...¡±


    ¡°No seriously,¡± Kyle said, grabbing Danny''s arm. ¡°Let go of her.¡±


    Kyle amazed at how calm he was. He''d been scared of Danny since they were little kids. And not because Danny had been bigger and stronger.


    It was because of the dragonfly.


    Back then he and Danny had been...not exactly friends. Not really. But part of the same group of kids that used to run around. And one day, he and Danny had been down by the river, and a dragonfly had landed on a plant. Kyle had thought it was pretty. Danny had held up a finger for quiet, then fast as a snake snatched it off the leaf and held it up triumphantly.


    ¡°Wow!¡± Kyle remembered saying. ¡°You caught it!¡±


    ¡°Yeah,¡± Danny laughed, the dragonfly struggling in his grip. ¡°And watch this.¡±


    He took one of his hands, meaty even back then, and tore off the dragonfly''s wings.


    ¡°Hey!¡± Kyle said. ¡°Why''d you do that?¡±


    ¡°Because it''s funny,¡± Danny said, tossing the dragonfly into the river. ¡°Now you do one.¡±


    ¡°What?¡± Kyle shook his head. ¡°What are you talking about?¡±


    ¡°I said you do one,¡± Danny said, snatching another dragonfly off a leaf and holding it out. ¡°Come on, go ahead.¡±


    ¡°I don''t wanna,¡± Kyle said. ¡°That thing never hurt me.¡±


    ¡°Who cares if it hurt you?¡± Danny said. ¡°Look at it, small and twitching like that. Come on, rip it apart!¡±


    ¡°No!¡± Kyle said, backing away, and something changed in Danny''s face. For a brief second Kyle got the image of...something else. Whatever it was lived behind Danny''s eyes. Twisted and ugly. And yet also...sad. Betrayed. Twisted and ugly and miserable, and somehow its misery was Kyle''s fault.


    ¡°Then get out of here!¡± Danny screamed, slapping his hands together and crushing the dragonfly between them. ¡°Get out! Get away! And the next time I see you I''m gonna crush you Anderman! I''m gonna crush you just the same!¡±


    And after that, Danny had made it his mission to ruin Kyle''s life whenever her could. And that''s how it had gone for another twelve years. Danny had become a classic bully. A clich¨¦. Almost a cartoon But Kyle had never tried to get around that, because he knew deep down inside Danny O''brien was deeply, darkly, dangerously broken, and it terrified him.


    But now, in the present day, with Danny grabbing onto Jenny''s arm, none of that seemed to matter. He was fed up with Danny, and he wasn''t going to let anything happen to Jenny.


    ¡°And what are you gonna do about it?¡± Danny sneered.


    Danny cut off, surprised at how easily Kyle pulled his arm away from Jenny''s. More than that, when Kyle let go there was a handprint on Danny''s wrist.


    ¡°What the hell man?¡± Benny said. ¡°Why''d you let him do that?¡±


    ¡°Shut up!¡± Danny snapped. ¡°So you been working out, huh twerp? Got a little cocky spending all day with those tits? I suppose I''d better remind you how things work around here.¡±


    ¡°Whatever,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Chase me, beat me up, I''m used to it. But she said she didn''t want to go with you, so leave her alone.¡±


    ¡°And who the hell said you could talk to me like that, you little shit!?¡± Danny roared, swinging his fist at Kyle. But it was like Danny''s fist was moving in slow motion. It was the easiest thing in the world for Kyle to step aside. And then he swung his own fist into Danny''s stomach and the bully went flying down the hall, eyes wide in shock, until he slammed into a display about the spring dance. Benny just stared in horror for a moment, then ran to check up on Danny.


    ¡°What happened!?¡± Kyle said, looking down at his own fist. ¡°What the hell just happened!?¡±


    ¡°I think I have a good idea of what happened,¡± Principal Irons said about an hour later. ¡°Danny and Benny don''t seem to want to push the issue, although school policy says I should punish you and Danny both...¡±


    ¡°But that''s not fair!¡± Jenny said. ¡°Those two scary guys were being mean to me! Kyle didn''t even mean to punch him that hard!¡±


    Principle Irons peered over her glasses at Jenny. Kyle hadn''t had much to do with her since he started school here, but everything about her said ¡°strict,¡± from the tight bun in her hair to the crisp lines of her dark suit to the corners of her squared off glasses and the piercing gaze she gave Jenny over them.


    ¡°Since Danny isn''t interested in pursuing the matter,¡± the principal continued, ¡°and knowing something of the young man''s character, I''ll leave it at that. Of course knowing something of the young man''s character I also know he most likely refused because he plans on taking a more personal revenge at some point. Do you understand?¡±


    Enjoying this book? Seek out the original to ensure the author gets credit.


    ¡°I do,¡± Kyle said. ¡°But what else is new?¡±


    ¡°Furthermore I cannot condone any violence at the school,¡± Ms. Irons continued primly. ¡°Nor could I express any satisfaction, if I were to do something as unbecoming as feeling any, that a considerate young man like yourself had successfully struck back at any other student, no matter how that other student behaved.¡±


    ¡°I think I understand,¡± Kyle said, and he couldn''t keep the corners of his mouth from twitching just a little bit upwards.


    ¡°Now you may both go about your business,¡± the principle said. ¡°But Miss Ragbah, I''d like you to think about pursuing disciplinary action.¡±


    ¡°What do you mean?¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°Danny and Benny have been...problems...for quite some time,¡± the principal said. ¡°If you were to make a formal complaint about him grabbing you, I might be able to do something about them. I won''t push you on it today, just something to think about alright?¡±


    ¡°A-alright,¡± Jenny said. She and Kyle left the principal''s office and headed off down the hall. There were already a lot fewer students than their had been earlier. School was letting out, and even athletics was starting to wind down now.


    ¡°Sorry about all that,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°It''s not your fault!¡± Jenny said. ¡°You helped me!¡±


    ¡°Yeah but now that I think about it you probably could have handled those guys,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Cursed them or something.¡±


    ¡°I probably could,¡± Jenny said. ¡°Now that I''ve granted your wishes I can only do a few minor magical tricks, but enough to deal with them. But even if I could it was really nice of you to step up for me like that.¡±


    ¡°Oh,¡± Kevin flushed. ¡°Okay. Well uhm, glad I could help. We should, uh, we should really go and catch up with everybody at the lab.¡±


    ¡°Okay!¡± Jenny said cheerfully, and off they went.


    The thing in the trench coat that flew on wings of fire shambled angrily around town. He''d been here a whole day, it was getting late again, and all he''d managed to get was lunch. And even then the waitress had screamed when he paid the bill and she saw his lumpy paw of a hand. He''d felt like throwing his coat off and really giving her something to scream about but no, he was supposed to be incognito. Looking for some stupid artifact the boss wanted. Some lamp.


    He wasn''t stupid. He knew if they were looking for a lamp it probably had a genie inside. But he wasn''t dumb enough to think that even the deepest wish of his heart could protect him from the boss, if the boss got angry. He''d be satisfied with his bonus for finding it. If he ever got out of this stupid town. He wasn''t supposed to make waves if he could avoid it, but at this point he''d have to steal a car.


    He was picking one out to steal when a human girl stood in the road. It was late at night and they were in the business district, so there was no one else around. Wisps of magic rose around the girl''s body as she stared at him.


    ¡°I know what you are,¡± the girl said. ¡°Who are you, and why are you here?¡±


    ¡°You''re supposed to introduce yourself first,¡± he rumbled at her. ¡°It''s just good manners.¡±


    ¡°Fine,¡± the girl said. If he had to guess she was a sorceress, or some kind of witch. ¡°My name is Tanya Myrdin, of the line of Myrdin, and by the power of the twelve wands and seven pentacles I demand you tell me your reason for coming to this place.¡±


    ¡°Touchy touchy,¡± he snarled. ¡°I''m just passing through. No law against that, not even an Uzbedi one.¡±


    ¡°We both know who you work for,¡± the witch said. Tanya. ¡°I''ve got enough trouble in town right now, we don''t need you poking around as well.¡±


    ¡°Enough trouble in town huh?¡± He growled, a smile playing across his lips. ¡°Oohhh. What kind of trouble? Just so happens I''m looking for a specific kind of trouble.¡±


    ¡°That''s my business and not yours,¡± Tanya said. ¡°If you''re passing through, pass already. You have wings, fly out of here.¡±


    ¡°Sure sure,¡± he said, reaching into his coat. He hadn''t thought to try it when he came to town, but he touched the large brass coin in his pocket. A detector the boss had given him. It was warm and vibrating. ¡°Just as soon as you tell me where I can find the lamp.¡±


    Tanya''s face twitched. It was the briefest thing, but he''d been looking for it.


    ¡°What lamp?¡± she said.


    ¡°Too late for that,¡± he chuckled, holding out his furry, paw-like hands with claws at their tips. He held a ball of fire in each one. ¡°But if you wanna do this the hard way fine by me.¡±


    ¡°I will cut off your filthy peasant hand if you try that again!¡± Ammeline snapped.


    Things were going well.


    Actually no joke they really were. Evan and Ammeline''s project was almost up to where it needed to be, they were on step nineteen. Kyle, Trevor, Betty, and Jenny had mostly been there for moral support, although having them all there made setup a lot faster than it could have been. Ms. Saunders was theoretically watching them, but she''d only been in and out a few times to see how they were doing. Which might not have been completely up to school regulations but no one was likely to have a fit about it.


    ¡°Alright alright,¡± Evan said. ¡°We''re here trying to fix your mistake after all...¡±


    ¡°What does that have to do with you trying to grab my ass!?¡± Ammeline demanded.


    ¡°She has a point,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°I wasn''t!¡± Evan grumbled, but he turned his attention back to the experiment...and mouthed ¡°traitor¡± in Kyle''s direction when nobody else was looking. Kyle shifted uncomfortably.


    ¡°It''s getting dark outside,¡± Jenny says. ¡°The stars look so pretty. And different from what I remember.¡±


    ¡°Well it''s been...¡± Kyle stopped himself before he said ¡°thousands of years.¡± It had been of course, which was why the positions of the stars were different, but they were keeping that a secret. ¡°I mean you''re a long way from home.¡±


    ¡°I guess I am,¡± Jenny said. ¡°I kind of like it here though.¡±


    ¡°And...¡± Ammeline poured the contents of her test tube into her beaker, ¡°Step 21. Done!¡±


    ¡°Oh good,¡± Evan sighed. ¡°Let''s pack up.¡±


    ¡°We''ll help,¡± Betty said. Kyle was a little worried about her. She''d been having a hard time, watching Evan chase Ammeline around.


    ¡°Yeah,¡± Trevor said.


    ¡°Thank you,¡± Ammeline said. ¡°Actually, I, uhm, I wanted to thank all of you. I did make a teensy little, a small...a mistake. And you all...well, thank you.¡±


    ¡°We were happy to do it!¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°Oh,¡± Ammeline blushed. ¡°Well, I mean. Thank you. Yes. I...¡±


    Ammeline was obviously uncomfortable thanking people. She was saved from having to come up with what to say next by the massive explosion that rocked the building.


    ¡°What the hell was that!?¡± Trevor said, dropping the empty beaker he''d been putting back in the fridge.


    ¡°Something just blew up outside!¡± Evan said from the window.


    ¡°It''s not just an explosion!¡± Jenny whispered in Kyle''s ear. ¡°It''s magic! Pretty strong magic!¡±


    ¡°I know,¡± Kyle said, his whole body tense.


    ¡°You do!?¡± Jenny hissed. Kyle nodded. It felt like his skin was tingling. Like the whole world was pressing down on him. He could feel there being more to the fire than just a normal explosion. If there was magic here, then it must have something to do with Jenny. It was too big a coincidence. And that might mean Jenny was in danger. He had to protect her. He had to see what was going on.


    ¡°Stay here!¡± Kyle told everybody, running for the door.


    ¡°Kyle wait!¡± Evan called after him. ¡°What are you going to...¡±


    But Kyle wasn''t listening. He pounded down the stairs and out onto the school grounds. Fire was still licking at the sky, fresh plumes and gouts of it rising into the air. There was another explosion and something flew towards him, landing in the dirt and leaving a deep furrow in the ground as it skidded towards Kyle''s feet. When it stopped he could see it was person, bleeding and bruised and covered in mud and soot.


    ¡°Tanya!?¡± He gasped, kneeling down next to her.


    ¡°Kyle...Ardman...¡± Tany said.


    ¡°What happened?¡± Kyle said. ¡°We need to get you to a hospital!¡±


    ¡°No....run...¡± Tany said. ¡°Efreet...¡±


    ¡°What''s an efreet?¡± Kyle said.


    He got his answer a minute later, when it landed on the grass nearby them. It still wore the tatters of a trench coat, as well as a pair of ragged pants, but they didn''t hide the creature''s inhuman nature. The thing was eight feet tall and muscled like a wrestler. It was covered in lumpy orange skin, and it''s face was a hideous mix of wrinkles, lumps, and enormous tusks. It''s eyes were tiny, piggy things that flickered like flames. It''s hands and feet ended in wicked black claws. Behind it''s back wings like a dragonfly''s made of fire twitched.


    ¡°Stupid bitch should have just told me what I wanted to know,¡± the efreet snarled. ¡°Hey you. Dumb looking human kid. Do you know where the lamp is?¡±

 Chapter 7: Efreet

    The monster''s question made Kyle have a lot of thoughts, really quickly, all at once. Normally that would be depicted as a series of individual words and short phrases, but it was happening way too fast and chaotic for that, so a better representation would be:


    Monstertanyawhatthehellknowsaboutthelampcouldhehurtjennywhat''sgoingonwhatHELP!


    On the outside, this meant he just stood there staring at the monster like an idiot. The creature scoffed and waved him away.


    ¡°Get out of here boy!¡± the efreet snarled. ¡°I''ve got business with the sorceress. And you don''t want to butt in.¡±


    Kyle''s first thought was bully. Run.


    Kyle''s second thought was Tanya. And Jenny!


    Call him crazy but efreet sounded kind of middle eastern to him. Now that he''d looked at it he''d seen enemies and things like it in video games, all of them designed with an ancient Arabian flare. So an ancient Arabian type monster showing up a few days after he found a genie in a lamp? It could not be a coincidence. And Tanya was hurt. He stepped between her and the efreet.


    ¡°Sorry,¡± he said, fighting down the fear that wanted to close his throat. ¡°But I''m butting in.¡±


    ¡°...idiot...¡± Tanya muttered.


    ¡°Kyle!¡± Trevor''s voice came from behind him. ¡°You can''t just....what the hell is that!?¡±


    Kyle turned around. It wasn''t just Trevor, Betty was there too.


    ¡°What are you doing here?¡± He demanded.


    ¡°We all got separated in the building,¡± Trevor said. ¡°Jenny and I wound up here first!¡±


    ¡°An efreet!¡± Jenny''s eyes were wide. ¡°What''s it doing here?¡±


    ¡°Look you two just take Tanya and go!¡± Kyle said, turning back to the efreet. ¡°And if you find everybody else in the school, take them with you! I''ve got an idea!¡±


    He didn''t wait for them to answer, he just ran at the monster. He did have an idea. It was kind of a stupid idea, but it was still an idea. He remembered how strong he''d been when he''d punched Danny earlier. Maybe, just maybe, his wish had given him super strength. Or made him a great fighter. Or something that would let him fight hold off the monster until everybody else could get away.


    Seeing his charge, the efreet grinned. Its claws caught fire and it swiped at Kyle''s head, but it was just like Danny''s punch before, like the blow was moving in slow motion. Kyle ducked easily under the swing and brought his fist up into the efreet''s gut. Its eyes went wide with shock as it choked, gagged, and fell to its knees on the ground, gurgling and clutching its gut.


    ¡°How did...¡± Kyle looked at his own fist. ¡°I mean, I hoped I could do something about it, but...¡±


    Kyle turned back to his friends, staring at their shocked expressions. How was he going to explain this? The only one who didn''t look shocked was Jenny. She looked panicked.


    ¡°No Master don''t turn your back yet!¡± Jenny called out. ¡°He''s not...look out!¡±


    She threw up her hands and her skin went from dusky brown to purple pink. There was a roar of frustration behind Kyle, and he turned back to see the efreet stumbling away from him, pink sparkles fizzling around it''s eyes.


    She said she could do minor magical tricks, Kyle thought. I guess she couldn''t disguise herself and blind the efreet at the same time.


    The fires within the efreets eyes flared higher, burning away Jenny''s spell. It turned its attention to Jenny, snarling, but Kyle ran at it again.


    ¡°Hey!¡± Kyle said. ¡°You''re fighting me!¡±


    The efreet swung a punch at Kyle but again, he ducked under it easily and planted one of his own across the efreet''s face. Then another. A left, a right, fists smashing into the monster''s jaw until one of the tusks broke off. Kyle wasn''t much of a fighter, but it seemed like he was so much stronger than the monster it didn''t even matter. When his punches knocked the monster''s face out of easy reach Kyle switched to it''s gut, punching faster and faster, a gatling gun of hits that sent the monster careening across the dirt.


    Was that my wish? Kyle wondered. To get really strong? Was that the deepest wish of my heart?


    ¡°Heh!¡± The efreet said, standing unsteadily up. ¡°Not bad, not bad you little pissant! Been a long time since I met a human who was stronger than me. A LONG time! If we keep going toe to toe you''ll kick my ass, no doubt about it!¡±


    Wait really!?


    There was a glint of rough respect the monster''s eye, and Kyle started having an out of body experience. He''d kept his sense of reality through all the genies, sorceresses, and monsters who had come through the ceiling, but finding himself overpowering an ancient beast and getting a respect one warrior to another was...


    Unauthorized reproduction: this story has been taken without approval. Report sightings.


    Like, he''d seen this crap in TV shows, but...


    Screw it. If he was living in a TV show now he''d use TV show lines.


    ¡°So give up,¡± Kyle said, clenching his fists, ¡°and go away. I could do this all night.¡±


    ¡°Yeah but see the thing is,¡± the efreet said. ¡°That''s a lot of speed and power you got going there. Physical enhancement node right? And your reaction time ain''t normal either. Gotta be mental enhancement too. So that''s two big nodes you''ve already got committed. Pretty damn impressive...in a close quarters fight.¡±


    The efreet''s wings of fire hummed and he floated into the air.


    ¡°But I''m an efreet!¡± monster laughed. ¡°I got my strength and powers built right in! So if I go up here you''re just another little human bug!¡±


    The efreet laughed and started throwing fireballs at Kyle and the others. The scene got chaotic fast. Trevor scooped up Tanya and pulled her out of the way, while Jenny ducked and rolled away from a few fireballs thrown in her direction.


    Tanya pulled herself out of Trevor''s grip and stood, raising her hands towards the monster. All around her feet new flowers sprouted in the grass, ones Kyle couldn''t name. Four huge ones grew taller than Tanya and from their blossoms fired spears of green, acidic looking fluid. The efreet just laughed and burned them up in the air, but at least it meant he wasn''t blitzing them all with fireballs anymore.


    But Kyle could see they were going to lose. So far as Kyle knew the only ones of them who could fight it were him¡ªeven if he didn''t completely understand why¡ªJenny, and Tanya. Tanya was already exhausted. If Jenny could help more she would have done it by now. And he didn''t understand his own powers at all, but the efreet seemed to and it seemed to think there was no way to fight at long range. By Kyle couldn''t see any option except to try.


    He was going to try and shoot an energy blast.


    He stood with both hands held out, cupped like he was going to catch a ball. He stood firm, proud, and feeling like a total idiot. He was literally mimicking stances he''d seen in anime. Is that how it even worked? Inner power? He tried to feel inside himself for some deep well of power. He almost thought he felt it. Alright, so picture that power flowing outward, into his hands, projecting towards his enemy, like....


    Kyle had seen movies where someone tries to fire a gun for the first time and they get thrown backwards by the recoil.


    It was a lot like that.


    A bolt of lightning shot from the palms of his hands, blasting upwards into the efreet''s chest. The crackling energy of it splashed around him. Kyle had absolutely no idea to control what was going on, and a lot of the magical energy wasted itself wreathing his body in snakes of crackling light that, while doing nothing to the enemy, had the benefit of making him look extremely badass. But most of it rose to strike the efreet in the chest, and Kyle saw him start to burn. The sky went white, the monster in silhouette, and with an acrid smell of burning flesh Kyle saw his target''s arms and legs disintegrate in the blinding light. When the white flash flickered and faded the efreet was nothing but a burning, screaming husk that flew off into the distance as if fired by the canon.


    And at the moment of impact, he also saw Evan and Ammeline coming out of the door of the school.


    In the meantime Kyle, of course, went flying backwards along the ground and wound up with his ass in the air against the wall of the school building. Recoil was no joke. Tanya stood over him, sticking out a hand to help him up. She held it out almost begrudgingly, as if she were doing him an enormous favor.


    ¡°Thank you for saving me,¡± she said stiffly as she helped him to his feet. ¡°I didn''t realize you were so powerful! What kind of nodes do you have!?¡±


    ¡°I have no idea how to respond to that question,¡± Kyle said. ¡°I didn''t know what I was doing. I''ve never even...wait! What about the others?¡±


    ¡°They caught the backlash of that lightning bolt you fired at the end,¡± Tanya said, waving to where Kyle''s friends were mostly on the ground unconscious, though Trevor was still standing. Unsteadily, but standing.


    ¡°Will they be okay?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°I assume so,¡± Tanya waved a hand dismissively. ¡°I cast a quick charm on them. I can''t erase memories, but with any luck they''ll all think this was a dream.¡±


    ¡°I meant their injuries,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°Oh. I think so? I''m not a doctor.¡±


    ¡°Master!¡± Jenny said, tackling Kyle with a hug and almost throwing him to the ground again. ¡°You were amazing! Since when can you do that?¡±


    ¡°I don''t know,¡± Kyle said, hugging her back. As he felt her warm body in his arms he felt another stab of guilt, and a flash of Evan''s leering face, but he forced it down this time. He''d just had a life threatening experience, he could let himself enjoy a hug without excess guilt. Tanya looked at the two of them with crossed arms, biting thoughtfully at her lip.


    ¡°Ah yes,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Things do make more sense now. The last genie. And I thought you were an Uzbedi agent...¡±


    ¡°Hey!¡± Trevor said, raising a hand like he was in class. ¡°I try to be a pretty easygoing understanding guy but can somebody please explain to me what the everloving holy bugfuck is going on?¡±


    ¡°Dammit,¡± Tanya said. ¡°My charm won''t work if he''s awake. Listen, can you believe this all has something to do with a really important secret and it could hurt your friends if you told anybody?¡±


    Trevor looked around at the devestation, and at Jenny.


    ¡°Yeah sure,¡± Trevor said. ¡°I can believe that. It doesn''t actually answer any of my questions though.¡±


    Kyle opened his mouth to speak, but he was interrupted by a groan from the entrance of the school. Ammeline walked out, holding the side of her head.


    ¡°What happened?¡± she mumbled. ¡°I think I hit my head...¡±


    ¡°Pink!¡± Tanya hissed.


    ¡°What?¡± Kyle blinked.


    ¡°Jenny is still pink!¡±


    ¡°Oh right,¡± Jenny said, and with a shimmer her middle-eastern skin tone reasserted itself, disguising her as human.


    ¡°I''ll explain everything later,¡± Tanya said, looking at Trevor. ¡°The fewer people who know about this the better. And hopefully I can get a few explanations myself.¡±


    ¡°I''m okay with explaining,¡± Jenny said. ¡°But what''s that noise?¡±


    Jenny was right. There were sirens in the distance. And everyone else was starting to wake up.


    ¡°We heard a noise outside while we were working late in the lab,¡± Tanya said quickly. ¡°And when we went out to check, there was an explosion. Everyone okay with that? Can you all remember that story? I do not need the Uzbedi''s going crazy right now.¡±


    ¡°As long as explanations are promised,¡± Trevor said.


    ¡°We''ll meet up after school,¡± Tanya nodded. ¡°For now...¡±


    ¡°What the hell happened!?¡± Coach Saunders shouted, leaning out the window. And then they firetrucks got there, and they had to start the explanations.

 Chapter 8: Things That Have Changed

    They spent a long time being questioned by the various emergency responders. Parents came. Teachers came. It was a circus. And even though he hadn''t gotten a chance to talk to the others Kyle was just as glad when he was able to drag himself home and crawl into bed. He thought he''d have trouble sleeping, but he collapsed almost immediately.


    He woke up with light streaming in from the window. He was amazed at how comfortable he felt, so warm and at ease. He was a little heavy though, like something was on his chest...


    He looked down. There was something on his chest. It was Jenny''s chest. And he her head too, resting on his shoulder. She was fast asleep, looking positively angelic as she law with him underneath the covers. He felt his nose threaten to spray blood but he fought it back. How had she gotten in here with him? How was he going to get out from under her? Should he wake her up?


    ¡°Oh,¡± she said, shifting in her sleep. ¡°Ohhhh...¡± her eyes fluttered open, her cheeks flushed. ¡°Good morning master.¡±


    ¡°Uhm...good morning,¡± Kyle said. ¡°When did you get in here?¡±


    ¡°You just uhm...¡± she trembled a little, though Kyle couldn''t see why. ¡°You just came in and fell asleep right away. So I kind of tucked you in and got in the bed with you Master.¡±


    ¡°Ah,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Okay. So uhm, is something wrong? Are you okay? You seem a little distracted.¡±


    ¡°It''s just...your hand...¡± she said, blushing.


    ¡°My what?¡± Kyle pulled the covers back. Sure enough his hand had once again wandered to her breasts, slipping between them in his sleep and now enveloped in soft, warm flesh. ¡°Traitorous pervert!¡± He yelled at his own appendage, yanking his hand away.


    ¡°I keep telling you I don''t mind,¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°But I mind,¡± Kyle said. ¡°It''s not alright to do things to people like that. It''s not okay at all. And I''m not Evan.¡±


    ¡°But he keeps trying to do it when people do mind,¡± Jenny pointed out.


    ¡°Still,¡± Kyle said. ¡°That''s no way for someone to act. I never should have done it in the first place, and saying I can''t stop is...just an excuse. And excuse a creepy guy would use.¡±


    ¡°I keep telling you you''re not Evan,¡± Jenny said. ¡°Maybe you shouldn''t have done the first time, but I''ve told you it''s alright...¡±


    ¡°It''s not though,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°Kyle, Evan is...¡± Jenny looked at him for a moment, then stopped. When she spoke again he could tell it wasn''t what she''d originally intended to say.


    ¡°You''re NOT like Evan,¡± Jenny said firmly.


    ¡°It''s just...never mind,¡± Kyle sighed, sitting up in the bed. ¡°What time is it? We should get to school.¡±


    ¡°It''s four in the morning,¡± Jenny told him.


    ¡°What!?¡± Kyle grabbed his phone. Sure enough, it was true. There was the clock right there, and a text message from his grandfather, telling him to call whenever he woke up. Since he didn''t feel like going back to sleep, Kyle decided to take him at his word and call the old man back immediately, four in the morning or not.


    ¡°What is that thing anyway?¡± Jenny said. ¡°I saw a lot of people with them at school.¡±


    ¡°It''s a smartphone,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Wow, you really have been gone for thousands of years. I''ll explain how it...oh hey grandad.¡±


    ¡°There you are!¡± the old man said on the other side of the phone. ¡°I''ve had to go on a sudden business trip, so I won''t be opening the shop for a few days.¡±


    ¡°A business trip?¡± Kyle blinked. ¡°Where?¡±


    ¡°Don''t worry about it,¡± the old man said. ¡°Besides, seems like you''ve got better things to do than stack crates for an old man!¡±


    ¡°What do you mean?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°Did you really think they wouldn''t call me?¡± The old man chuckled. ¡°I''m your legal guardian after all. Or I was before your turned eighteen the other week.¡±


    ¡°Then where were you last night?¡± Kyle asked. He didn''t want to go so far as admitting he''d missed the old pervert, but...


    ¡°Well when I got to the shop you were already niiice and tucked in,¡± he could feel his grandfather''s lecherous grin over the phone. ¡°With your genie girl all nice and cozy...¡±


    ¡°Grandad don''t even...¡±


    ¡°Good job, boy!¡± the old man said proudly.


    ¡°Stop it!¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°Alright alright,¡± his grandfather said. ¡°Seriously though, are you okay? I mean you looked pretty comfortable, but seriously.¡±


    ¡°I''m fine,¡± Kyle sighed. ¡°Sorry for making you worried. But Grandad, last night I...¡±


    There was a crashing noise from the other end of the line.


    ¡°Oops!¡± His grandfather said. ¡°Gotta go boy! We''ll talk tomorrow okay?¡±


    ¡°But-!¡± Kyle sighed. The phone had already gone dead. ¡°Okay.¡±


    ¡°Alright,¡± Jenny said. ¡°Come on, we should get to school!¡±


    She hopped out of bed and Kyle could now see that she was, in fact, completely naked. He forced down the anime nosebleed. That was NOT going to turn into a running gag. He tried to focus on anything else as she ran around the room looking for...what was she looking for?


    ¡°What are you look for?¡± he asked.


    ¡°Clothes!¡± she said. ¡°I put some here somewhere!¡±


    She bent over to look in a bottom drawer it was too much. The blood in his nose shot out like rocket exhaust and his head banged against the wall.


    ¡°Master!¡± she yelped, running to his side. ¡°Are you okay? Are you hurt?¡±


    I''m fine, but you''re going to kill me, he thought.


    ¡°I''m fine,¡± he said. ¡°But this is my room remember? We gave you a room. Your clothes should be in there.¡±


    ¡°Oh right,¡± she cocked her head. ¡°I still don''t see why I can''t sleep in here with you.¡±


    ¡°Because I already can''t trust my hands,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Who knows what would betray me if you were in here every night? I''m trying to remain a decent human being.¡±


    ¡°Not like Evan,¡± Jenny nodded.


    ¡°Evan''s not a bad guy he''s just...¡± Kyle shook his head. ¡°He''s just kind of bad at the world. I am too.¡±


    ¡°Mmmm,¡± Jenny seemed to think about it for a second. ¡°Okay Master. Anyway, we need to get to school!¡±


    ¡°It''s too early to go to school,¡± Kyle said. ¡°It''s not just open all the time. We can only go when school starts. If they open it at all today. We blew up the green, damaged a few of the buildings, they might decide to close down.¡±


    ¡°But what about...¡± Jenny looked absolutely desperate. ¡°Chicken nuggets?¡±


    Kyle looked at her for a second.


    ¡°You do realize they don''t just have those at school right?¡± He said.


    ¡°What?¡± She blinked.


    ¡°They''re one of the most popular foods in this entire country,¡± he said. ¡°They sell them at all kinds of places.¡±


    Support creative writers by reading their stories on Royal Road, not stolen versions.


    Jenny''s eyes widened.


    ¡°You can even buy them at the store and heat them up at home,¡± Kyle said.


    The genie girl''s eyes started to sparkle. Literally, little flashing lights started dancing around in front of them as she contemplated a world where she herself could control the chicken nugget flow.


    ¡°Now put some clothes on,¡± he said.


    ¡°Why?¡± She cocked her head.


    ¡°God every day you sound more like a horny hallucination I had,¡± Kyle sighed. He supposed if she wanted to walk around naked in her own home¡ªand he DID want her to think of this place as home, it had to beat a cramped little lamp¡ªhe didn''t have the right to stop her. But it was just so...it made him feel guilty. Like he was tricking her into something. Or taking advantage of her. ¡°Look, I''m super hungry, and we''ve got some time to kill before school. Plus I just remembered something that''ll make you pretty happy.¡±


    A few minutes later Jenny''s eyes were wide and bright, basking in the glow from the microwave.


    ¡°You had chicken nuggets here?¡± Jenny said in wonder, watching them spin in the radioactive haze.


    ¡°I forgot we had them in the freezer,¡± Kyle shrugged. ¡°I mean I didn''t have a reason to think about them the other night, you only discovered how obsessed you were with them yesterday. And last night we were busy.¡±


    ¡°Is there sauce?¡± she asked.


    ¡°Over here,¡± Kyle said, picking up a bottle of barbecue sauce as the microwave beeped. ¡°Am I going to get any of those?¡±


    ¡°I''ll consider it,¡± Jenny said, grabbing the plate from the microwave and following Kyle out into the living room. She sat down on the couch beside him and he picked up the remote.


    ¡°Television,¡± she said. ¡°I''ve seen spells that can do this but they''re rare and super complicated.¡±


    ¡°The benefits of technology I guess,¡± Kyle shrugged. ¡°We''ve got a while to kill before we meet up with Tanya, so I''m going to put something on to help me calm down.¡±


    ¡°Oh okay,¡± Jenny said. ¡°What was that thing you were watching the night you summoned me?¡±


    ¡°Forgotten Garden?¡± Kyle asked, suddenly nervous. ¡°Yeah, listen, I like that show but...¡±


    ¡°But what? It looked fun!¡±


    ¡°Well it is,¡± Kyle admitted. ¡°I mean the plot is good and the action is great, but..¡±


    ¡°So let''s watch it! Can I see it from the beginning?¡±


    ¡°I mean in all honesty it''s still basically just softcore porn with aspirations...¡±


    ¡°Please?¡± She asked, wide eyed. He relented, opening the app and starting Forgotten Garden from the first episode. This was going to be interesting. Especially episode five, with the banana.


    Jenny got interested almost as soon as the first opening started, anime girls in short skirts smiling as they flew from the screen down towards an endless expanse of lush green grass. Kyle studied her face. He wasn''t completely dense, he would have known ¡°I''m fine¡± meant absolutely not fine even if Jenny had been any good at all at hiding her emotions. Which she wasn''t. At all.


    But what could he say? He''d only known her a few days, and it wasn''t like he had a ton of experience with people in the first place. He had half an urge to push her, to make her tell him what was wrong, but the other half urge was to let it wait. Let her decide when she was ready to talk about whatever was making her upset.


    ¡°Oh wow!¡± Jenny said, leaning forwards and staring at the screen. ¡°Her hair is so beautiful! Do you think I could do that?¡±


    Her hair turned the pale green of Kimiko''s on the show, and just like that waiting won. He wanted to know what was wrong, but she looked so happy in that moment trying to twist her hair to match the complicated twirls of an anime character he didn''t have the heart to make her talk about serious things. Even if he did have to disappoint her by pointing out that even if magic could achieve the hair she was trying to mimic, it would draw to much attention out in public.


    Which was where they were just a short while later, walking not to school, but to Tanya''s house. School was indeed closed, but Tanya had sent them a time and an address to meet. Kyle hadn''t been able to get in touch with anyone else, which was...worrying, but he''d swing by and talk to them as soon as he got a chance.


    For now, he wanted answers from Tanya. And he was enjoying walking with Jenny.


    ¡°...and mermaid''s don''t really work like that,¡± Jenny said. ¡°Or at least they didn''t last time I was out of the lamp. But they said this was taking place in...it''s called Japan? That''s far out in the east right? I guess maybe these are eastern mermaids. Come to think of it we''re farther out in the West than I even thought there were any continents, so that could make sense. And I love the way Oyuki flows around in that dress with the snow...¡±


    ¡°I''ll be honest I''m kind of surprised you were so into it,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°It was fun!¡± Jenny said. ¡°I want to know what happens with Kei and all the girls next! You said there''s how many more episodes? Fifty?¡±


    ¡°Fifty one, and the new season just started.¡± Kyle shook his head. ¡°And the harem aspect doesn''t bother you?¡±


    ¡°There''s going to be a harem?¡± Jenny said. ¡°Well I suppose that makes sense. Though I can''t picture Kimiko standing for it.¡±


    ¡°Kimiko is already standing for him making out with Oyuki,¡± Kyle pointed out.


    ¡°So what, that means she''s just going to let him lock her up?¡±


    Kyle paused a moment. Then he took out his phone and looked up the word ¡°Harem.¡±


    ¡°A sequestered and isolated area for keeping wives, pre pubescent male children, unmarried daughters, and female slaves away from the public!?¡± he read with growing alarm.


    ¡°Basically a barn for your wives. I can''t picture Kimiko putting up with anything like that.¡±


    ¡°Okay well the modern use of the word is kinda different,¡± Kyle said. He took a moment to explain.


    She looked at him and blinked.


    ¡°So by harem you just mean lots of girlfriends and wives?¡± she asked. ¡°Why would it bother me?¡± She asked. ¡°Tons of people have....harems. Even if that''s not how I''m used to using the word. And at least Kei is meeting the girls and collecting them for love instead of just buying them.¡±


    ¡°Wait,¡± Kyle said, rubbing his temples. ¡°Wait, just, wait a second.¡±


    There was a moment''s pause.


    ¡°Are you going to ask me a question?¡±


    ¡°No I''m just trying to suppress the headache,¡± Kyle explained. ¡°The culture shock thing can really reach up and get you sometimes. Listen, Jenny, something you should probably know. Harem''s aren''t common anymore. Not for most of the world, anyway, and definitely not in this country.¡±


    ¡°Really?¡± Jenny shook her head. ¡°I suppose that makes some of the stuff I''ve seen make sense, but...really?¡±


    ¡°It''s not even legal in this country to be married to more than one person,¡± Kyle said. ¡°It''s a crime. It''s called Bigamy. I know there are people who do it anyway, some religions like the Mormons do it, and I think there might be special legal exceptions for them but mostly it''s not a thing.¡±


    Jenny cocked her head in thought for a moment.


    ¡°I mean I believe you,¡± Jenny said. ¡°It''s just kind of hard for me, you know? Last time I was out of the lamp harems were all over the place. Even a merchant who only owned a small market stall probably had at least two wives. It was just...how things worked. I wonder if it''s still legal in Uzbedi? I wonder if I''d recognize anything there anymore.¡±


    She slumped, and he found himself putting an arm round her shoulder. His brain screamed at him, not in adolescent lust but in panic, absolutely certain she would slither away from his touch. But instead she leaned into his embrace, resting her head on his shoulder.


    ¡°Come on,¡± he said, pointing to a dark blue roof sticking up over the other houses. ¡°I''m pretty sure that''s Tanya''s place, we should hurry up. Don''t want to keep everyone waiting.¡±


    It would be very pleasant to find an excuse for Danny O''Brien.


    Poverty is a classic. Crushing poverty, crushing hard enough to stamp coal into diamonds. Poverty so crushing it makes a man''s soul hard and cruel, because he had to to survive the weight. But while that does happen, Danny O''Brien had never experience poverty of any sort. Oh his family wasn''t the richest in Rolling Hills, but poverty was a far distance away from the quiet suburban home in which he had live all his life,


    Bad parents are popular these days. Always were, really. Parents who are neglectful or cruel, a father to beats and resorts to the belt, an upbringing of cruelty and violence building him into a cruel and violent man because that is all he knows of the world. And once again, not so. Danny''s parents could in no way be described as abusive or neglectful.


    The opposite then. A doting mother and father who can see no wrong in their perfect boy, who ignore the signs of his cruelty, who do not punish when he should be punished. Who follow the first basic duty of a parent, to keep their child fed and safe, while ignoring the second, to show their child what it means to live and be a person. Another kind of neglect, really, and this one very likely to produce a villain in the real world. But once again, not applicable to the story of Danny O''Brien.


    The truth was, Danny O''Brien was a jerk.


    It really wasn''t more complicated than that. Danny was a jerk. He woke each morning and chose cruelty and violence, no outside input needed. He would occasionally be caught, and punished by the school or his parents, but he took these punishments as the cost of doing business and living life the way he preferred. With his foot pressed into someone''s face. And if perhaps there was something darker there, something twisted and horrible Kyle had once seen behind his eyes over the corpse of a tortured dragonfly, then that was something he''d been born with too, and it lay relatively quiet inside of him.


    For now.


    When he woke up that morning there were loud voices downstairs. Something must be up. He rolled out of bed and headed down to find his sister still eating at the table and his father pacing back and forth on the phone.


    ¡°And I''m telling you there was some kind of explosion over here too!¡± his father insisted. ¡°I mean I can see the smoke through my window right now.¡±


    ¡°Morning jerk,¡± his sister said.


    ¡°Morning loser,¡± he shot back. ¡°What''s going on?¡±


    ¡°There was a gas explosion at the highschool,¡± she shrugged. ¡° And something happened on our street too. Look see? Dad''s right you can see the smoke. I think Dad''s worried the gas lines over this way are busted like they were at the school.¡±


    ¡°I appreciate that you''re checking the entire system,¡± Danny''s father was saying. ¡°I should hope you''re checking the entire system. I''m just saying when there was a big bang last night and I can see smoke rising in the air it makes more sense to check this part of the system first.¡±


    Danny shrugged. Troubles with the gas system weren''t his problem, and he couldn''t find any advantage to interfering with them, so he didn''t feel any particular urge to get involved. He sat down, ate his breakfast, and then tried to decide what he was going to do for today. Go to class, probably. He actually did that most days. But maybe he could take a nap first. He headed back upstairs to catch a little more sleep.


    As he lay down and closed his eyes, he dreamed he heard a voice.


    Hey kid the voice said. Hey I wanna talk to you for a second.


    ¡°What? Why?¡± Danny mumbled. There was something wrong about the voice, something ugly.


    Because I''m dying the voice told him. And I wanna make you an offer. There''s a lot worse than death, so I can''t just check out, and you might like what I''ve to suggest.


    ¡°No,¡± Danny mumbled. ¡°You''re creepy. Shut up.¡±


    Okay kid the voice said. I can hold out for a couple more days. Even weeks maybe. But you smell like you''re gonna take it, eventually. Besides, we got an enemy in common.


    Danny grumbled a curse word and rolled over in bed. He was facing away from the closet, but even if he''d rolled the other way his eyes were closed. He probably never would have seen the dull burning orange light fade away, as if something that glowed with inner firer had taken a few steps back away from the door.

 Chapter 9: Get a Load of Those Nodes

    Tanya''s house was in the more upscale section of town, where Kyle didn''t go much. The houses here were larger, and far apart, though it was still a comfortable walk from the school. Tanya''s house in particular was behind a high row of hedges. The house itself was white with a blue roof, and ivy growing up the walls. As they approached, Kyle noticed the windows were patterned, and something about the twisting metal between the odd shaped glass panes brought to mind mysticism and magic.


    Or maybe that was just because he knew a sorceress lived there, and he had magic on the brain.


    ¡°Those are protection runes!¡± Jenny said. ¡°They don''t look exactly like the ones I''m familiar with, but I''m pretty sure that''s what they are.¡±


    ¡°Knew it!¡± Kyle said, clapping his hands together triumphantly.


    ¡°What?¡± Jenny asked.


    ¡°Don''t worry about it.¡±


    ¡°So I guess we just knock and hope she lets us in?¡± Jenny said, reaching up for the doorknocker, a huge brass ring hanging from the nose of a leering goblin face.


    ¡°Wait Jenny...¡±


    ¡°What?¡±


    ¡°Well for one thing most people don''t expect you to actually use those,¡± Kyle said. ¡°They''re decorative. And for another thing...what are the chances that thing''s going to talk?¡±


    Jenny stopped, her hand inches from the brass ring.


    ¡°Oh,¡± she said. ¡°That''s a good point. It does look like it might start talking, huh?¡±


    ¡°Yeah,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Hey, doorknocker, can you talk?¡±


    The brass goblin face just stared at them.


    ¡°I''m going to poke you in the nose,¡± Kyle said, following word with action. No response.


    ¡°I guess we''re okay,¡± Jenny said, reaching for the brass ring. She grabbed it and banged it against the door three times. They could hear it echoing through the house. And then, a few seconds of nothing.


    ¡°Huh,¡± Kyle said. ¡°I thought something was going to happen.¡±


    ¡°Like it would yell at us or something!¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°Right,¡± Kyle nodded. ¡°That''s exactly. Or a big trap door would...¡±


    And then the world was made of spirals. When it stopped, they were standing in a room with stone walls and a red carpeted floor. Tanya stood in front of them, arms crossed, glaring at them.


    ¡°...drop us into a dungeon,¡± Kyle finished, looking around.


    ¡°This isn''t a dungeon!¡± Tanya said. ¡°It''s my basement! And that wasn''t a trapdoor it was a short range teleport spell, there''s no doors to this place anywhere you need magic to get in. You know what Trevor didn''t do, when he got here? Waste my time blithering on the front step!¡±


    Now that Tanya had mentioned him, and Kyle had some time to adjust to his surroundings, he saw Trevor standing behind her. He gave Kyle a quick wave. Kyle took a second to breathe, and let what Tanya said sink in.


    ¡°No you know what?¡± Kyle said. ¡°To hell with that.¡±


    ¡°What?¡± Tanya snapped.


    ¡°Not sure what the hell is up with you but this is the second time you''ve started yelling at me for no reason,¡± Kyle said. ¡°I don''t know what you''re so pissed about, but I don''t have to sit here and take it. I came here because you said you''d explain what was going on, but I''m perfectly willing to leave if you''re just going to yell at me. I may not know any teleport spells, but apparently I''ve got super strength now. And energy beams. Between the two of them I just bet I''m strong enough to punch my way back to the surface.


    ¡°You think you can survive what''s happening without knowing anything?¡± Tanya demanded.


    ¡°No idea,¡± Kyle shrugged. ¡°But right now, all I know is that you were fighting with someone who wanted to hurt Jenny. That only gets me halfway to trusting you. I''m sick of getting yelled at for things I didn''t do, and Jenny can probably teach me enough to get by.¡±


    ¡°Uh, actually Kyle?¡± Jenny said. ¡°I don''t know much about magic, I''m magical.¡±


    ¡°What?¡± I looked at her.


    ¡°Magical creatures like genies tend not to know much about magic,¡± Tanya said. ¡°They don''t have to learn about it because it''s what they are.¡±


    ¡°I mean do you know how your body makes spit?¡± Jenny said. ¡°Sorry. But you''re right, she''s being really annoying and I bet we could figure it out!¡±


    ¡°See?¡± Kyle said. ¡°We''ve got confidence and enthusiasm on our side. So are you going to stop treating me like crap, or am I going to find an interesting way to get me and Jenny out of here back to the surface?¡±


    Tanya crossed her arms under her chest, glaring at him for a moment.


    ¡°Fine,¡± she said. ¡°Sorry. Come on, it''ll be easier to explain in the other room.¡±


    With that she turned to walk away.


    ¡°I don''t get it,¡± Trevor said, walking along with them. ¡°She seemed so grateful to you last night.¡±


    ¡°I do,¡± Jenny said. ¡°That was in the moment. Now she''s had time to think about it...I don''t think she''s used to having other people help her.¡±


    ¡°I can hear every word you say!¡± Tanya called back.


    ¡°Magic?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°Echoing stone hallways,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Let''s call that lesson one. Just because you know magic exists now doesn''t mean everything has to be magic.¡±


    She lead them through more stone hallways until they reached a room with murals on the walls and a table in the center, and in the center of the table a spiking formation of crystal like a small tree. It almost looked like it had grown there naturally, but the shimmering lights within the stone were anything but natural.


    The crystal was interesting, but it was the walls that held Kyle''s attention. They depicted...chaos. Destruction. Kyle didn''t recognize most of the creatures those walls depicted, other than to put them in general categories like ¡°angels¡± and ¡°demons.¡± There were human warriors by the thousands depicted as well, all engaged in wretched, bloody battle. Kyle was used to ancient paintings depicting war as...glory. And grand adventure. But this made it feel like he was staring into hell. Even the ground seemed to rebel, tearing itself to pieces beneath the battle.


    ¡°What the hell is this?¡± He asked.


    ¡°The Last Great Mage War,¡± Tanya said. ¡°It''s part of what I need to explain to you. But that''s literally ancient history. Since your experiences are more recent, you tell me what''s going on and what you know and I''ll fill in the gaps?¡±


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    So Kyle told them, about finding the lamp and making his wish. And meeting Jenny. It wasn''t a long story really, despite at the time feeling like it would take up several chapters of an online novel. When he was done, Tanya was nodding and Trevor looked thoughtful.


    ¡°So you really have no idea what you wished for?¡± Trevor asked.


    ¡°The deepest wish of my heart I guess,¡± Kyle shrugged. ¡°So maybe superpowers? I don''t know.¡±


    ¡°There''s no way to know,¡± Jenny said. ¡°Or to know who else got wishes. Sorry! I hope you got one.¡±


    ¡°Yeah well I dunno about wishes,¡± Trevor said. ¡°But I definitely got something.¡±


    ¡°What do you mean?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°I accidentally destroyed my garage last night,¡± Trevor said. ¡°My dad keeps talking about termites, but it wasn''t that. The door was a little stuck and I tried to open it, so I pulled as hard as I can...and I tore the whole thing apart.¡±


    ¡°Meaning you''ve already got an active physical enhancement node,¡± Tanya said.


    ¡°You said that before,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Nodes. What does that mean?¡±


    ¡°Oh I know that part!¡± Jenny said. ¡°They''re sources of magical energy inside the human body!¡±


    ¡°Right so far as it goes,¡± Tanya said. Her earlier abrasiveness had gone, and now there was something about her that said ¡°strict professor.¡± ¡°They''re a lot more complicated than just things that produce magic, but you can think of them that way. Parts of your soul that generate magical power you can use. And you can take those nodes and specialize them so you can use that power. It sounds to me like you must have at least two nodes, Kyle. One you assigned to your physical body, making you stronger, and one for emitting energy. And one for mental energy too, if the efreet guessed right. Although if you do you''re very lucky. Not only is three nodes by itself uncommon, assigning a mental enhancement node by yourself can be dangerous.¡±


    ¡°So it''s like picking abilities in a video game?¡± Trevor asked. ¡°And my strength means I''ve got at least one node?¡±


    ¡°Right. And that''s probably all you have. Most people only have one or two nodes. I''ve got five, and I''m considered a prodigy. My father has seven, and he''s considered an archmage. Considering the power Kyle showed last night, he''s got at least two strong ones. Not bad.¡±


    ¡°So you can only learn one spell per node?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°No, spellcasting is different.¡± Tanya said. ¡°You need one node, preferably a powerful one, assigned for energy emission. Then you can adjust that to create different spells. That''s something you might want to learn.¡±


    ¡°Mmm,¡± Trevor said. ¡°What about Jenny? If she''s a genie, does she have nodes?¡±


    ¡°Yes but they''re not like human nodes,¡± Tanya explained. ¡°She''s born with a set number of nodes, already set to a specific kind of magic.¡±


    ¡°Is there any way to get rid of it?¡± Trevor asked, looking down at his hands. ¡°To remove your nodes, or close them off or something? I don''t want to wreck another garage.¡±


    ¡°No,¡± Tanya shook her head. ¡°The only thing you can do is learn to control it. Magical strength beyond what your body can do is something you have to call on. If your practice, you can learn not to use it by accident.¡±


    ¡°I should probably practice that too,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°And we need to make sure we know about all of your nodes,¡± Tanya said. ¡°An unused node can cause all kinds of problems. If you have any unused nodes you can take some time to decide what you want to use them for, but they should be connected to something.¡±


    ¡°I have a question!¡± Jenny said, with her hand raised way above her head.


    ¡°You can just ask,¡± Tanya rolled her eyes.


    ¡°Why are we supposed to keep magic a secret?¡±


    ¡°Oh,¡± Tanya said. ¡°That. Keeping magic a secret is a terrible idea. It puts people without magical power in danger they wouldn''t be in otherwise, and it makes it a lot more likely for people who are born with magical power but who aren''t in the know to do something wrong and get themselves hurt.¡±


    ¡°Then uh...¡± Kyle started to ask, but Tanya cut him off.


    ¡°But we keep it a secret because the Uzbedis make us do it.¡±


    ¡°Why?¡± Trevor asked.


    ¡°Because of that,¡± she pointed to the walls. ¡°The Last Great Mage War. A war between nations ruled by sorcerers, in what most people think of as humanity''s prehistory. It was the worst war in human history. The continents of Atlantis and Mu were destroyed completely, and the planet''s magical aura was burned out for thousands of years. Only the people who had the strongest connection to magical energy could still use it at all.¡±


    ¡°Wait,¡± Jenny said. ¡°Atlantis is gone!? I had a Master from Atlantis! I thought the world map at school looked weird!¡±


    ¡°Uzbedi was the only remaining magical dynasty,¡± Tanya said. ¡°And they decided magic needed to take a back seat in the world. They wrote a list of edicts for how magic could be used and who could be told about it, and they enforce it. Rigorously. If they had their way nobody outside of Uzbedi would get magic at all.¡±


    Kyle couldn''t help but hear the bitterness in her voice. There was something personal there. And now this was an issue Kyle would have to deal with too. Would the Uzbedis be coming for him now, too?


    ¡°But let''s get to checking your nodes,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Put your hand on the crystal in the middle of the table.¡±


    ¡°Alright,¡± Trevor said, reaching out and putting his hand on the crystal. The minerals glowed, and above the table appeared an image of Trevor''s silhouette, with a brightly glowing star inside of it. So bright It almost blinded Kyle, and he put a hand up to block his eyes.


    ¡°One titanic node,¡± Tanya said appreciatively. ¡°Impressive. Most people only have small or average nodes. Titanic is the largest possible size.¡±


    ¡°So you don''t just have super strength,¡± Kyle said. ¡°You have level 99 super strength.¡±


    ¡°But nothing else,¡± Trevor said. ¡°Honestly I''m kind of relieved. What size are your nodes, Tanya?¡±


    Kyle suddenly felt like it was a very good thing Evan wasn''t here.


    ¡°I have one colossal node,¡± Tanya said proudly, not making things any better. ¡°Two large, and two small. Kyle, let''s check you out.¡±


    Kyle shrugged and reached out, putting his hand on the crystal. Trevor seemed pretty hesitant about these powers, but Kyle couldn''t help but feel excited. Magic sounded like fun! He kind of hoped he had another node, just to see what he could do with it.


    His silhouette appeared over the table, looking like a constellation.


    ¡°That''s more than five,¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°I can see that!¡± Tanya snapped at him. ¡°Nine, ten...twelve. Twelve nodes. Three colossal nodes, the size just below titanic. Four huge nodes. Two average nodes. Two small nodes. And one tiny node. Oh, but it''s an eternal node.¡±


    ¡°An eternal node?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°Nodes have a limited capacity before they have to recharge,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Except for eternal nodes. They never run dry. They''re so rare I didn''t even bother mentioning them. It''s only a tiny trickle of power...but whatever you assign that node to it will never run dry. Assuming you even need it, with your other eleven nodes.¡±


    ¡°Wow!¡± Jenny said, jumping on Kyle and hugging him. ¡°You''re super strong!¡±


    ¡°It''s the wish,¡± Tanya said. ¡°It has to be the wish, somehow. Nobody naturally has nodes like that.¡±


    ¡°I''m so glad Evan isn''t here,¡± Kyle said. ¡°I have to figure out something to assign all those nodes to?¡±


    ¡°Yes,¡± Tanya said. ¡°The sooner the better. This power is ridiculous. If you just leave it lying around...well, picture a box full of dynamite left in a match factory.¡±


    ¡°I guess I''d better start researching,¡± Kyle said. ¡°So did I wish for powers? Is that it?¡±


    ¡°We don''t know that,¡± Jenny said. ¡°Maybe you''ll need these powers to get what you really wished for.¡±


    ¡°Did my powers come from the wish?¡± Trevor said.


    ¡°There''s a more mundane explanation for yours,¡± Tanya told him. ¡°You got hit with the backlash from Kyle''s lightning blast last night. It probably opened up any dormant nodes you had.¡±


    ¡°But does that mean everyone I hit is going to get powers?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°Only if they have latent nodes as well,¡± Tanya said. ¡°And there isn''t much chance of that. I''m surprised even Trevor had any magical power. One in three is surprising on its own.¡±


    ¡°Alright,¡± Kyle said. But a thought nagged at the back of his mind.


    Unless my wish had something to do with it...


    In her room, at home, Betty Peltzer was trying to focus on her project.


    Don''t try to picture how Betty decorates her room. Some things are not meant to be looked into, lest they drive mad the minds of men. Just picture her at a desk, working at a computer, and blur out the walls in your mind. That''s the important part, that she was trying to get some work done on her project.


    It was difficult, because her memories didn''t quite make sense. Not for getting caught up in a gas explosion. The EMT''s had said she was fine, but her thoughts were strange. She had images in her mind she felt almost sure were a hallucination. A big orange monster. Kyle firing an energy blast. Crazy stuff. It was probably a dream. And there was a voice in her head, that sounded almost a little like Tanya''s, telling her it was a dream.


    But it didn''t feel like a dream.


    She picked up the cat and moved it off her keyboard, putting her attention into detailing the leather harness on her computer screen.


    It didn''t feel like a dream, it felt real. Solidly real. And so did the place in her chest where the blast had struck her. The blast she remembered as lightning, but couldn''t be. Because you didn''t get lightning in a gas explosion. But she remembered it crackling and snaking through the air, and she was almost sure it had been coming off of Kyle''s body...


    The cat was on the keyboard again. She grabbed it absentmindedly and threw it onto the floor.


    And ever since the lightning, or whatever it was, had hit her she''d been feeling weird. There was...a tightness in her chest sounded bad. It was almost like there was a looseness inside of her. Like her body had so much more to it than before. Not physically, just more...energy. More brightness. She wasn''t sure how to describe it.


    And this cat isn''t helping, she thought as a tail tickled her nose. The cat jumped up onto the keyboard again and sat down, staring at her.


    ¡°Kitty,¡± she said, then stopped, adjusting her glasses. ¡°Wait a minute. I don''t have a cat.¡±


    The cat stared at her with the flat, bored expression you can only find on a feline face. That expression didn''t change in the slightest as it casually burst into flames.


    ¡°AHHH!¡±

 Chapter 10: Mutations

    School was back on the next morning, so Kyle and Jenny found themselves walking out that way again. They had a lot on their minds. Or at least Kyle did. Jenny was excitedly pointing out kinds of bird she''d never heard of.


    ¡°And that''s a Bluejay?¡± Jenny asked.


    ¡°I think so,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°Are there other colors of Jays?¡±


    ¡°I uh, I actually don''t know.¡± Kyle scratched his head. ¡°I only ever really heard of the blue ones. But it makes sense right?¡±


    ¡°Any idea what you want to spend your other nodes on?¡±


    It took Kyle a moment to catch up to this change of topic.


    ¡°No idea yet,¡± Kyle shook his head. ¡°I mean I don''t even really know what the options are. Tanya seemed kind of frazzled by the whole thing.¡±


    ¡°She''s strange,¡± Jenny said. ¡°I think the part where she''s angry isn''t really her. Or it''s not all her. I think she feels like she needs to act like she''s angry for some reason.¡±


    ¡°I don''t know,¡± Kyle said. ¡°If I understood people my life would have been very different in this town.¡±


    By the time they got to the school there were still people running around all over, from the gas company and fire department. The area where Kyle had blasted his magical lightning whatever was cordoned off with tape, and emergency workers were stomping all around it. Kyle heard some of their conversation as he headed into school.


    ¡°I''m telling you there''s no gas lines here.¡±


    ¡°Then what the hell exploded Harry? Can you tell me that?¡±


    ¡°Honestly? Looks like a lightning strike. And this grass is looking at me funny. Like it....knows...things....¡±


    ¡°Check again for gas.¡±


    ¡°There''s nothing on the detector.¡±


    ¡°Well something''s gotten into your brain...¡±


    Well that was worrying. Was it possible for the magic he used last night to do something to the ground? Kyle hoped he hadn''t had TOO severe a magical effect on the school grounds and hurried into the building. Or at least he tried to, because what he actually did was slam right into Betty, knocking both of them to the ground.


    ¡°Oh no!¡± Jenny said. ¡°Are you both alright?¡±


    ¡°I''m fine,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°I am also perfectly alright,¡± Betty said distractedly.


    ¡°Betty!¡± Kyle said, finally registering who he was talking to. ¡°I haven''t seen you since the other night! You didn''t answer your phone! What happened?¡±


    ¡°Oh I was...busy,¡± Betty said, her eyes darting all over the place.


    ¡°You sure?¡± Kyle pressed. Distracted was normal for Betty, but this was more distracted than usual. ¡°You''re acting a little...well, I just want to be sure you''re okay.¡±


    ¡°Yes,¡± she said, looking around nervously. ¡°Have you, by any chance, seen...a cat?¡±


    ¡°Lately? No,¡± Kyle shook his head. ¡°What kind of cat?¡±


    ¡°That remains the worrying question,¡± Betty muttered. ¡°No cat? No...cat shaped clouds? Or shapes like a cat in the brickwork?¡±


    ¡°No nothing like that,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Why are you so worried about cats?¡±


    ¡°The question is why cats are so worried about me,¡± Betty said. ¡°Or, more likely, I am beginning to go insane. We had both better hurry into class.¡±


    ¡°I''m looking forward to more chemistry!¡± Jenny said, punching the air.


    As they ran into the building, none of them noticed the two spikes in the dirt. The spikes crumbled away as soon as the two of them had left, as if they had never been there. But before they did they looked exactly like the ears of a cat.


    And that wasn''t the only strange thing going on at school that morning.


    Gloria ¡°Goldie¡± Goodman was the school''s third princess, and of a type with Ammeline. They both considered themselves unparalleled beauties, they both thought of themselves as modern royalty, and neither of them was shy about telling people. They were also both blonde, although Goldie kept her hair straight and long as opposed to Ammeline''s thick, looping curls.


    Where they differed was in their ambitions. Ammeline wanted to be a senator, maybe president someday, big and shiny and out there in public. Goldie thought that was stupid. The real power was in quiet success in the background. So while Ammeline had run for student council, and joined the fencing team, and generally made herself as public as possible in every possible way...Goldie had joined the chess club.


    She was president, of course.


    The chess club was exactly what she needed. It stimulated her brain, it looked good on transcripts and applications, and it helped her make the sort of friends who liked chess club. Many of them would be future accountants, lawyers, tax collectors. In short, people she could use. And while she didn''t have any particular disdain for people she couldn''t use, she preferred ones she could.


    The chess club tended to arrive early, to get some extra practice in. With school starting they were just wrapping up morning practice when Evan walked in.


    Evan Warnick. Known attempted peeping tom. Generally considered obnoxious, though kept in check by the other quiet kid. Carl? Something like that. An occasional nuisance if he leered too openly at her in the hallway, but generally not someone she took the time to consider.


    ¡°And how can we help you?¡± She asked, looking up from her game. ¡°As you can see, we''re practicing right now.¡±


    She was expecting the usual reply to that, something about why do they need to practice when all they do is play board games. Depending on how rudely he said it she had a list of eighty seven replies stashed away in her head ranging from ¡°oh it''s actually much more complex than that¡± to ¡°wanna see where I can shove this chessboard?¡±


    Evan was the first person in five years she didn''t have a prepared response ready for.


    ¡°Your performance this year has been pathetic,¡± Evan declared. It took Goldie a second to catch up.


    ¡°I''m sorry what?¡± Goldie asked.


    ¡°I said you''re pathetic,¡± Evan said. ¡°A collection of brain dead morons who wouldn''t know king''s pawn from a hole in the ground. The chess club is a waste of valuable school funds which could go to a program with competent members.¡±


    ¡°We''re third in the state!¡± Someone shouted from the back of the room.


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    ¡°More like third-rate!¡± Evan said with a snicker at his own joke. ¡°Furthermore you all dress like hobos and your mothers sleep with barnyard animals.¡±


    ¡°MY MOTHER IS A SAINT!¡± roared one of the club members, and Goldie held a hand out to keep him steady. Chess enthusiasts could be surprisingly volatile people. She checked around the room. Seven other members of the chess club besides her, and all of them about ready to beat Evan to death with a desk.


    ¡°Your name''s Evan right?¡± Goldie asked through gritted teeth. ¡°Is there a point to this, or are you just here to annoy me? Because if that''s what it is you''ve succeeded, and you can leave now.¡±


    ¡°I am here to prove your pathetic inadequacy,¡± Eric said. ¡°I propose that you are all so useless that I could beat every single one of you. And I don''t mean alone, that would be too pathetic for words I couldn''t even pretend it was a challenge. No, I mean that I could beat this entire chess club at once.¡±


    ¡°That''s ridiculous!¡± Someone shouted. ¡°Even grandmasters can''t handle that many games at the same time!¡±


    ¡°They''re right,¡± Goldie said. ¡°The challenge is ridiculous. Have you ever even played chess? What you''re talking about is impossible.¡±


    ¡°Oh really?¡± Evan grinned and pulled out a wad of bills. ¡°Bet you fifty bucks? Each.¡±


    They day went pretty normally, which Kyle found endlessly frustrating. Last night had not been normal, at all, and what he wanted were explanations. He did not want history class. Or even chemistry class. Which wasn''t particularly fun for...a lot of reasons.


    For one thing, Betty and Evan both weren''t there. Betty''s lab partner seemed hopelessly lost, and Kyle had a sneaking suspicion Betty had been doing most of the work all semester. Ammeline, on the other hand, seemed to be having the time of her life as she moved her way through the experiment...which had, apparently, been perfectly fine left over and extra day.


    ¡°Hey Ammeline,¡± Kyle found a chance to ask her. ¡°Are you doing okay?¡±


    He hadn''t talked to her either, but that wasn''t as strange. Until Ammeline had declared Jenny her rival, Kyle had barely talked to her.


    ¡°Mmm? Oh you mean after the gas explosion,¡± Ammeline waved her hand. ¡°Ahahahaha! Do you think such a minor impact would seriously affect me? Me?¡±


    ¡°So no weird effects?¡± Kyle pressed. ¡°Nothing strange? No large hairy men showing up at your house telling you you''re a wizard?¡±


    ¡°What are you babbling about?¡± Ammeline raised an eyebrow at him. ¡°The only unusual thing around here is the extraordinary way I''m going to beat my rival in this assignment!¡±


    ¡°Now she''s going to beat me with the chemicals?¡± Jenny lamented.


    ¡°This assignment...isn''t...competitive...¡± Kyle said, but she was ignoring him already and working on her lab.


    Kyle shared a look with Jenny, who just shrugged. He shared a similar one with Trevor, who he hadn''t really had a chance to talk to. For the moment at least, Ammeline seemed unaffected. Maybe he was overthinking it. What were the chances his other friends had powers?


    Of course there was still the worrying question of where they were. He was still mulling it over as class came to an end and they were packing up.


    ¡°Hey look, its Betty!¡± Jenny said, pointing out the window. ¡°In those statues or whatever.¡±


    ¡°Statues? Oh, that''s the old playground,¡± Kyle said, peering out the window. ¡°There used to be a preschool back there, the high school and university bought the land when it shut down. But they never got around to putting away the playground equipment. What''s she doing out there?¡±


    ¡°She''s....bending over,¡± Jenny said. ¡°Way, way over. Why is she doing that?¡±


    Betty was trying to pick up a cat. That kind of thing isn''t easy at the best of times, and these were not the best of times. She hadn''t gotten much sleep last night, with a flaming cat in her bedroom. The flames hadn''t seemed to catch anything on fire, but even Betty, with her calm exterior, had trouble dealing with an active source of flame in the room with her.


    Her parents had thought the cat was adorable, and of course it had stopped burning long enough to meet them, get food, and then went back to Betty''s room and set itself ablaze again. Then she''d gotten scolded for picking up a cat without telling them, when the family hadn''t decided whether to get a cat or not yet.


    Betty had seen, read, and watched enough to know not to make more than one attempt at telling people what was going on. The cats powers were a secret, apparently, and the only person it wanted to know was Betty. Why was something she would have to figure out later. And then the cat had followed her to school, which had been worrying enough, but sometime overnight during her fitful sleep it had stopped setting itself on fire.


    Halfway to school, it turned into a rock and sank into the road. It had dived and leaped through the asphalt like a fish all the way to campus, and then it had disappeared completely. Betty had spent all day looking for it. She had a sneaking suspicion it had been playing with her on purpose. She''d finally found it in the old playground, but...


    ¡°Betty?¡± Kyle asked, and she turned away from what she was doing. ¡°What''s going on?¡±


    ¡°Do need that cat statue for your big project?¡± Jenny asked.


    Betty looked down at the solid steel cat she''d been trying to lift off the ground for the past thirty five minutes. She sighed and collapsed back on the ground, crossing her legs beneath her and taking a couple of deep breaths.


    ¡°Is this part of the old playground equipment?¡± Kyle asked, walking up to the cat. ¡°It looks too detailed. You can make out individual hairs.¡±


    ¡°It would be smart not to get too close to that,¡± Betty said. ¡°I do not yet know it''s personality.¡±


    ¡°Personality?¡± Kyle blinked, taking a step back from the cat.


    ¡°This may be difficult to explain.¡± She cocked her head thoughtfully. ¡°And then again, it might not. Kyle, are you keeping any secrets from me?¡±


    ¡°What kind of secrets?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°Secrets about the true supernatural nature of the world,¡± Betty said. ¡°And your own participation therein. As well as Jenny''s skin tone being pinkish-purple, and how those factors effected the incident last night being publicly described as a gas explosion.¡±


    ¡°Oh,¡± Kyle said, rubbing the back of his neck. ¡°Those secrets.¡±


    ¡°So there is something supernatural going on,¡± Betty said. ¡°Well, that was already confirmed. But maybe you can explain things to me. Why does this cat keep doing strange things? Do you know this cat?¡±


    ¡°No,¡± Kyle shook his head. ¡°No I don''t know anything about a cat. I suppose I owe you...¡±


    Something brushed against Kyle''s leg. The solid metal cat had gotten up and was rubbing itself against Kyle''s leg.


    ¡°...an explanation,¡± Kyle finished. ¡°I never should have listened to Tanya, I should have told everyone what happened right away.¡±


    ¡°Tanya Myrdin?¡± Betty cocked her head. ¡°Ah. Yes. Her being involved in this makes sense. For now though, I am attempting to control this cat.¡±


    ¡°Well the cat is...¡±


    Gone. The cat was gone. Absent. Departed. Left. Vamoosed. Screwed off. Sayonara, adios, arrivaderchi. Pfft.


    ¡°Where''d it go!?¡± Kyle asked, lifting his foot from the sudden puddle of water on the ground.


    ¡°I do not know,¡± Betty said. ¡°You distracted me. But it has been doing things like this since last night.¡±


    ¡°No it''s still here!¡± Jenny pointed to the puddle of water. ¡°It melted.¡±


    The puddle of water sprouted a pair of watery ears and a tail like a flowing river. Then it shot across the ground like a fish darting through a pond, heading towards the school building. Betty hurried off to chase it, Kyle and Jenny hurrying along behind.


    ¡°Tanya!¡± Evan said, waving to her in the halls. ¡°Tanya Myrdin! Just who I''ve been looking to see!¡±


    ¡°Why?¡± Tanya narrowed her eyes suspiciously. She was aware of Evan''s reputation, though she''d mostly avoided him. ¡°What do you want from me.¡±


    ¡°To talk about...genies.¡±


    She grabbed him by the arm and pulled him out of the main hallway, glaring at him.


    ¡°Why Tanya, so forward! I suppose you won''t mind if I reach out and...¡±


    ¡°None of that!¡± Tanya snapped. ¡°Not now. What are you talking about? What do you know?¡±


    ¡°I know that a normal person can''t memorize every possible chess gambit in a single night,¡± Evan said. ¡°I know I didn''t used to have a perfect photographic memory.


    ¡°I also know that weird stuff started happening the same day a strange new girl showed up. Topless. In my best friend''s house. A girl I saw with purple skin last night. I saw you and Kyle throwing powers around like something out of an anime, too. And I know that the voice in my head trying to tell me it''s all a dream sounds a lot like you.


    ¡°So magic. Gotta be. Genie makes the most sense to me because Jenny said she was from the middle east, and a girl with funky purple skin from the middle east you just kind of make an association right? If I ask Kyle we''re gonna get in an argument, because I''m pretty pissed he kept this from me the whole time. But maybe there''s a good explanation, and chances are you know what it is. So I''m starting with you.¡±


    Tanya glared at him.


    ¡°Mental enhancement,¡± she sighed, stepping back. ¡°Dammit. Somehow or other you connected a node to your brain. A pretty powerful one.¡±


    ¡°Well you know,¡± Evan said. ¡°I was all stressed out the night after the phony gas explosion. I needed to...concentrate.¡±


    ¡°Ugh,¡± Tanya shook her head. ¡°Why couldn''t it have given you a stroke?¡±


    ¡°A stroke?¡± Evan said, suddenly alarmed.


    ¡°Mental enhancement is the hardest way to connect a node. Most people who try on their own give themselves seizures and die. But no, you had to connect it properly...¡±


    ¡°Nodes,¡± Evan said thoughtfully. ¡°Interesting. I take it nodes are how this super powers stuff works. I bet you''ve got a great set of nodes.¡±


    Tanya stared at him flatly.


    ¡°I am so very glad you weren''t there yesterday,¡± she said. ¡°But yes, it''s safer for everyone if you get an explanation. Two of you. I just have to hope nobody else who was there last night had dormant nodes.¡±


    A puddle of water with ears and a tail splashed down the hall way beside them.


    It was followed by Kyle, Betty, and Evan.


    ¡°I don''t think hoping worked,¡± Evan told her.


    ¡°That was a Five Elements Cat,¡± Tanya said. ¡°What is a Five Elements Cat doing in the school? Oh why do I even bother to ask anymore. This is too much to be a coincidence. Damn it all, Kyle Anderman, what did you wish for?¡±

 Chapter 11: Five Elements Cat

    Kyle, Betty, and Jenny chased the living puddle down the hall.


    ¡°I have concocted a stratagem,¡± Betty said. ¡°Last night, it acted like an ordinary house cat around my parents. It seems to be keeping its true nature a secret, at least from them. Possibly if we guided it to a place with more people, it would revert to a normal animal and be easier to capture.¡±


    Unfortunately, that was easier said than done. The halls of the school were almost empty, it being the end of the day after a big event. Teachers and students alike have a tendency to ignore their classes under situations like that.


    ¡°The lockers,¡± Kyle said firmly. ¡°There has to be someone hanging around there. Even if it''s just Danny and his goons.¡±


    ¡°Understood,¡± Betty nodded. ¡°But we have no way of influencing his movement.¡±


    ¡°I might!¡± Jenny said, extending a hand. Her illusion of a dusky human skin tone faded away to pinkish purple, and pink light flickered around her fingers. Sparks traced from her fingers to the figure of the fleeing puddle, glistening as they sparkled through the fluid. At the next junction, it turned left.


    ¡°Fascinating,¡± Betty said, staring at Jenny as her human illusion reasserted itself. ¡°I assume this has something more to do with the supernatural nature of recent events. What exactly did you do?¡±


    ¡°I sent it an illusion!¡± Jenny beamed. ¡°It sees a really wriggly fish swimming that way.¡±


    Around the corner there was a splash and a scream. The three of them rounded the corner to find...


    Cindi Walker.


    That was a surprise. Kyle hadn''t thought about Cindi Walker in months. In grade school he''d had a crush on her, just like everyone else in school starting to get an interest in girls. She was a bubble, cheerful redhead. Over the years thought, two things had become painfully obvious.


    One, Cindi Walker was terminally stupid.


    Two, Cindi Walker was also a bitch of colossal proportions.


    Now, even though the years had given Cindi the kind of figure people got yelled at for describing in books because it stretched suspension of disbelief, it was mostly new people who got attracted to Cindi. Danny had dated her a few times, that was about all anyone local needed to know. Things like that had a tendency to dull romantic thoughts.


    Now, though, she was wearing her cheerleading uniform and absolutely soaked with water. The thoughts which came to Kyle''s mind weren''t romantic, exactly, but they were in the same neighborhood. The seedy side of it.


    Kyle shook his head. This was not the time for that kind of thing.


    ¡°Oh, my god,¡± Britanny said, looking down at her soaked uniform, then glaring at the three of them. ¡°Did you three do this?¡±


    ¡°How?¡± Kyle asked. ¡°What do we have to carry water in?¡±


    ¡°You could have hidden a bucket or something around the corner,¡± she said. ¡°What, did you want a peep show? Well take a good look, because once I tell Danny and he gets his hands on you...¡±


    Kyle had some lingering instinctive fear of Danny, but intellectually he knew there probably wasn''t much Danny could do to him right now. Not after he''d punched Danny down the hall. But as Cindi''s angry rant went on, Kyle''s eyes were drawn to something else.


    A pair of ears, rising from the water soaked into her top.


    She''s not just soaked with water, Kyle''s brain finally caught up. She''s soaked with THE CAT.


    A tail sprouted from Cindi''s dampened hair. And then all hell broke loose.


    Her uniform top began moving like a thing alive, squirming all over her body, twisting and tightening and tugging in every direction. Cindi screamed in surprise and frustration.


    ¡°Ahhh! Ahh! What the hell!?¡± She demanded. ¡°How are you doing this?¡±


    All three of them held their hands up to show they couldn''t possibly have anything to do with it. With a final violent jerk like the snapping of a flag in the wind, the liquid cat exploded from Cindi''s top, throwing her into the lockers as it disappeared down the hall.


    ¡°We should go,¡± Betty said.


    ¡°Sorry!¡± Jenny said as they ran past her. ¡°Not that we had anything to do with what happened!¡±


    ¡°Come back here!¡± Cindi shouted from her place on the floor.


    ¡°I do not intend to do that!¡± Betty called back.


    They followed the cat through the hallways again, and this time, and as they ran Kyle started to get a sense of where it was going.


    ¡°The pool,¡± Kyle said. ¡°It''s heading for the pool.¡±


    ¡°I do not believe there is anyone in there right now,¡± Betty told him.


    ¡°Well I guess we''ll find out,¡± Kyle said. They reached the door to the pool room and opened the door carefully, stepping inside to find...nothing.


    The room was indeed empty, the waters of the pool quiet and still.


    ¡°Were we wrong?¡± Jenny asked, looking around. ¡°I thought we saw it come in here.¡±


    ¡°I believe so as well,¡± Betty said. ¡°It may have transformed again. We should be careful.¡±


    They walked around the pool, looking carefully in every shadow for the cat. Their footsteps echoed oddly in the wide open space.


    ¡°This is still so strange to me,¡± she said. ¡°I saw them on TV, but the last time I was out having a big pool of water like this...well, a school couldn''t have one. This was for palaces. Of course at the time only people who lived in palaces really attended school. At least anything as complete as this. But now you say lots of people have them for just their houses.¡±


    ¡°Benefits of the modern world I guess,¡± Kyle shrugged. ¡°I mean I''ve never had a pool, so I can''t really talk about it.¡±


    ¡°The last time you were out,¡± Betty said. ¡°Have you been freed from some kind of confinement? And after a great deal of time. I assume you aren''t human, or at least not an ordinary human.¡±


    ¡°Oh! I''m a genie,¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°I see,¡± Betty said. ¡°That would make sense.¡±


    ¡°Kyle freed me from the lamp! And now a whole bunch of stuff has been happening.¡±


    ¡°I can only imagine,¡± Betty said, the light catching her glasses as she slid them up her nose. ¡°But I would very much like specifics. What, exactly, did he wish for?¡±


    ¡°Betty,¡± Kyle said. ¡°It doesn''t work like that.¡±


    ¡°I can only imagine the wishes born from the mind of a young man just past his eighteenth birthday, when a woman so prodigiously endowed fell into his lap, bound to serve him...¡±


    Unauthorized usage: this tale is on Amazon without the author''s consent. Report any sightings.


    ¡°It''s not like that!¡± Kyle said. ¡°Stop it!¡±


    ¡°Mrrrooowwww,¡± the cat said, and they all whirled around trying to find the source of the noise. There was a wet, burbling quality to the sound, as if it was coming from...


    ¡°Underwater!¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°Do you think it''s in the pool?¡± Jenny asked, staring into the water.


    The water stared back.


    A cat''s eye the size of Jenny''s entire torso opened up on the surface of the water. Jenny yelped and stumbled back, and the water in the pool began to rise up, forming the head and front paws of a cat rising out of the pool. The tips of the ears scraped against the high ceiling of the room, and the arms the cat waved in their direction were all longer than its body.


    ¡°This is an unfortunate development,¡± Betty said.


    ¡°Yeah,¡± Kyle said, staring up at the monstrous cat. ¡°This is getting out of hand.¡±


    ¡°It could really hurt someone like this,¡± Jenny said worriedly.


    ¡°I know.¡± Kyle pulled down into himself, for the well of power he''d used against the efreet the other day. He was a little afraid, terrified really, of firing another lightning blast like the one he''d used to fight off the monster. It would probably demolish the building, let alone the fact that it could damage his other friends. But maybe if he could call on a little of that power...


    The cat focused on him and hissed.


    Can it tell what I''m trying to do?


    ¡°Mrooowww!¡± the cat yowled, swinging a paw at Kyle larger than he was. Kyle bolted out of the way, moving faster than he was read for but catching himself before he did more than crack the tiles around the pool. The cat''s enormous paw crashed into the ground and exploded into water, splashing all over the three of them as it slid back into the pool. Above them, the water reformed into the shape of the cat''s paw.


    ¡°Alright nothing else I can do,¡± Kyle said, lightning crackling at the corner of his eyes. ¡°I''m going for it!¡±


    ¡°Don''t do that!¡± Tanya said, bursting through the door with Evan in tow. ¡°You have no idea what you''re doing, you''ll take down the whole building!¡±


    ¡°Well what am I supposed to do?¡± Kyle said.


    The giant water cat was reaching back for another swing. As it''s paw came down Tanya stepped in front, raising her hands. A cold wind blew from around her, and a soft beam of pale blue light washed form her hand into the creature. The water froze the instant the beam touched it, freezing the whole head and shoulders solid. They bobbed in the water like an iceberg. There was a meowl of protest, and a puddle of waters with ears and a tail burst from the water and hurried away down the hall.


    ¡°Oh,¡± Kyle said. ¡°I don''t know how to do that yet.¡±


    ¡°I know you don''t!¡± Tanya snapped.


    ¡°Thanks Tanya!¡± Jenny said. ¡°You saved us!¡±


    ¡°That was my mistake!¡± Tanya glared. ¡°How are you two so much trouble already! And you!¡± She pointed at Betty. ¡°What are you doing summoning things you don''t know how to control!¡±


    ¡°Summon?¡± Betty blinked. ¡°I summoned nothing. It appeared in my room last night. I am only just being initiated into the supernatural nature of events.¡±


    ¡°Right,¡± Tanya sighed. ¡°Right. Okay. Yes, you did summon it. But you didn''t actually complete the ritual. So it''s here, and it won''t go too far from you, but you can''t control it either. That is the absolute worst way this could be happening. Why wouldn''t it be?¡±


    Kyle looked over and caught Eric''s eye.


    ¡°You too?¡± He asked.


    ¡°Yep!¡± Eric said. ¡°I''m even smarter now than I was before!¡±


    ¡°That''s not actually what mental enhancement does,¡± Tanya cut in, but Eric ignored her.


    ¡°Ladies,¡± he said. ¡°Looking good!¡±


    For the first time, Kyle noticed that Betty and Jenny were completely soaked. Neither of them reacted to Evan''s comment. Kyle found himself missing Ammeline, she probably would have slapped him.


    ¡°One problem at a time,¡± Tanya said, rubbing her temples. ¡°That creature is called a five elements cat. The rest of you need to go make sure it doesn''t hurt anyone else until we have it under control.¡±


    ¡°What are you going to do?¡± Jenny asked.


    ¡°Betty and I are going to perform a proper familiar bonding ritual,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Once that''s done, she should have control over the Five Elements Cat.¡±


    ¡°So that''s what this creature is called,¡± Betty said thoughtfully. ¡°I see. So I summoned it inadvertently somehow last night.¡±


    ¡°We can sort all that out later,¡± Tanya said. ¡°For right now, I want to know why the rest of you idiots are still standing here.¡±


    ¡°We don''t know how to find it,¡± Kyle said. ¡°There''s no sign of it down the hall.¡±


    ¡°What was it before it was water?¡± Tanya said. ¡°Was it fire, or metal?¡±


    ¡°It was metal!¡± Jenny said. ¡°How did you know that?¡±


    ¡°The interactions of the five elements is required reading for a sorceress,¡± Tanya waved a hand dismissively. ¡°It''s going down the creation cycle. Water creates wood. It''ll turn into wood next, and it''ll be heading for someplace where there''s either a lot of natural wood growth, or a lot of purely wooden construction.¡±


    ¡°The old gazebo out back,¡± Evan said. ¡°It''s got both. The gazebo is wood, and it''s in the middle of a patch of trees.¡±


    Kyle nodded, leading Jenny and Evan away after the cat. Tanya dragged Betty over to a dry corner and pulled a piece of chalk that glittered like gold out of her bag.


    ¡°Now let me show you how to do this,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Either you''ll succeed or you''ll fail, but either way the cat will be out of our hair.¡±


    ¡°What will happen if I fail?¡± Betty asked.


    ¡°The mystical backlash will throw the cat back to its home dimension and burn you to a crisp.¡±


    ¡°Oh.¡±


    Kyle, Evan, and Jenny found themselves standing next to the old gazebo a few minutes later. There was, once again, no sign of the cat.


    ¡°Maybe Evan was wrong,¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°Impossible!¡± Evan told her haughtily. ¡°I''ve got a super brain now!¡±


    ¡°No wait,¡± Kyle said. ¡°We fell for this before. It''s probably merged with one of the trees or...something...¡±


    Before Kyle had even finished speaking, from the roof of the old wooden gazebo, a pair of pointed ears carved from wood had sprouted. The gazebo rotated on its base, and he saw that under the ears a pair of slit pupiled eyes had grown. They glared down at him.


    ¡°Mroowwowowoowww!¡± The Gazebo meowed in his direction, and the trees around it began to writhe like tentacles.


    ¡°Oh boy.¡±


    Tanya and Betty knelt on either side of a circle drawn in golden chalk, odd symbols around the sides almost like some kind of unearthly clock. Betty had her eyes closed, and her hands over the circle.


    ¡°So can you feel it?¡± Tanya said. ¡°An active source of power inside of you?¡±


    ¡°I do feel something strange,¡± Betty said. ¡°When I focus.¡±


    ¡°Good,¡± Tanya said. ¡°That''s the node you used to summon the five elements cat. Now I need you to focus on that, and repeat the chant. That should help your energy and the cat''s energy combine.¡±


    ¡°And if I say it wrong...¡±


    ¡°Don''t worry about that.¡±


    ¡°You strongly implied I would die.¡±


    ¡°If you don''t do it soon, I''ll kill you.¡±


    ¡°I suppose that''s fair enough.¡±


    Kyle always knew he would have to face the gazebo alone.


    Maybe not entirely alone. Evan was surprisingly useful with his newfound brain powers, whatever they were. He kept calling out where the gazebo-cat was going to strike next, giving Kyle a chance to dodge. Jenny was helping too, confusing it with illusions to give Kyle more time to react.


    But when it came to getting hit with trees, it was all down to Kyle.


    For what it was worth the trees didn''t hurt that much. His reinforced body must be able to take a lot of punishment. But it still hurt, and neither Jenny nor Evan could take the hits. So he was out there, getting hit by...well, not really trees. The trees themselves didn''t move much. But they sprouted new branches that whipped and lashed like tentacles, and those were what he was getting hit with.


    ¡°MRRROOWWWWW!¡± The catzebo hissed furiously, all its tentacles retracting.


    ¡°Evan!¡± Kyle called back. ¡°Now what''s it going to do?¡±


    ¡°I don''t know!¡± Evan said. ¡°I can only figure things out based on what I already know...¡±


    The ground erupted around them and they found themselves wrapped up in roots.


    ¡°Okay,¡± Evan said. ¡°I should have seen this one coming...hkkk!¡±


    The root-tentacles started to close tightly around all three of them, cutting off Evan and Jenny''s air. Kyle, in the meantime, was just furious. With a grunt of effort he tore free of the root holding him and raced over to Jenny, ripping the wood apart and dropping her into his arms.


    ¡°Are you okay?¡± he asked.


    ¡°Yeah,¡± she said breathlessly, looking up at him. ¡°That was really cool.¡±


    ¡°Thanks,¡± he smiled back.


    ¡°But you should probably go save Evan.¡±


    ¡°Oh right!¡± Kyle turned and ran towards Evan, but he needn''t have bothered.


    The roots were already disappearing back into the ground. Turning to the gazebo, Kyle saw the cat face had disappeared completely.


    The five elements cat sat in the golden circle, licking it''s paws. Betty leaned back on her elbows, panting with effort and covered in sweat.


    ¡°Congratulations,¡± Tanya said. ¡°You have officially bound your first familiar. A Five Elements Cat, no less.¡±


    ¡°Yes,¡± Betty leaned forwards, peering at the cat. ¡°I take it this creature is unusual even among other magical beasts?¡±


    ¡°It''s one of the most sought after familiars you can get,¡± Tanya said.


    Now that it wasn''t transforming into anything, it looked like a sleek, streamlined cat with silvery fur and black stripes, its ears paws and tail tipped black. It leaned in and licked Betty affectionately on the nose.


    ¡°Oh good,¡± Kyle said, walking up to them. ¡°Because when it stopped attacking us I was afraid we''d lost control of it again.¡±


    He knelt down next to the cat, still sitting in the ritual circle, and put out a hand so it could sniff his fingers.


    ¡°You''re actually kind of cute when you''re not going all crazy,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Peace?¡±


    The cat stared up at him, then nuzzled his fingers with its furry cheek before hopping into Betty''s laugh.


    ¡°That is unusually high praise from a cat,¡± Betty commented.


    ¡°The ritual was a success,¡± Tanya said. ¡°But all of you are going to have to learn how to handle your nodes.¡±


    ¡°Oh I just bet you know how to...¡±


    ¡°Speak again and I''ll kill you,¡± Tanya cut Evan off.


    ¡°I''ll do some speaking,¡± Kyle said, turning to Betty and Evan. ¡°I owe you guys an explanation, huh?¡±


    ¡°Yes,¡± Evan said, glaring at him.


    ¡°That would be helpful,¡± Betty said, cradling the cat in her arms.


    ¡°All of you should come to my house tomorrow afternoon,¡± Tanya said. ¡°I''ll leave the explaining to you, Kyle.¡±


    Tanya walked away, leaving Kyle alone with his friends.


    ¡°Right so...¡± he shook his head. ¡°Look, come over to my place. I''ll do my best to explain what''s going on. Looks like you''re all caught up in this mess too.¡±

 Chapter 12: Fed Up

    The walk to Kyle''s apartment above the antique shop was quiet, but the quiet ended as soon as they closed the door. Betty and Evan pelted him and Jenny with a billion questions. Eventually, pizza was ordered. By the time it arrived, things among the three of them were finally starting to calm down.


    ¡°So you didn''t want me to feel bad if I didn''t get a wish?¡± Evan said, drumming his fingers on the side of the couch. ¡°Alright. Acceptable. I will accept that as a reason you didn''t tell me what was going on. Friendship reinstated.¡±


    ¡°Well good,¡± Kyle said. For everything that made him uncomfortable about Evan...well, they''d been friends forever. Evan was practically a brother, really.


    ¡°But as I understand things there is no way to know if our wishes were granted,¡± Betty said, nuzzling her cheek against the head of her new familiar. It might have been an odd gesture, with her passive neutral face, to someone who didn''t know her well enough to recognize the subtle signs of her contented expression. ¡°My family has been discussing getting a cat. Possibly my wish was granted, allowing me to have the cat I wanted?¡±


    ¡°I don''t know,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Jenny, could that be it?¡±


    They looked over at Jenny. Her eyes had glossed over.


    ¡°That expression is familiar,¡± Betty said.


    ¡°The nuggets,¡± Evan agreed.


    ¡°What is this?¡± She asked.


    ¡°Pizza,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°Technically pizza napoli,¡± Betty cut in. ¡°Pizza has dozens of different variations all across Italy, all various forms of round baked goods. But immigrants to the united states specifically from the area around Napoli were the ones who popularized their regional version of pizza internationally. There''s actually a government department in Italy that makes sure all regions are capable of providing tourists with Napoli style...¡±


    ¡°Pizza,¡± Jenny said dreamily. Then she shoved the entire piece in her mouth.


    ¡°Wow!¡± Evan said. ¡°Throat skills!¡±


    The cat hissed at Evan, but everyone else was too busy watching Jenny fall on the pizza like a horde of ravening wolves. It''s not easy for one not-too-tall woman to imitate a horde, but pizza makes it easier.


    ¡°Why don''t we order another pie?¡± Kyle said. ¡°Or a couple. She can try a few different toppings.¡±


    ¡°It comes with other toppings!?¡± Jenny said through a mouth full of food.


    ¡°And we should put on something to watch,¡± Betty said.


    ¡°Yeah!¡± Evan grinned. ¡°Like our old anime marathon days!¡±


    ¡°Forgotten Garden!¡± Jenny said excitedly.


    ¡°Sure that''s a good one,¡± Evan said.


    Kyle smiled, reaching for the phone. Evan was right, it really was like old times. Somehow that was still true even though there was an extra girl, and she happened to be a genie. It was a reminder of the way things used to be.


    All the more precious, because they knew things would never be the same again.


    Eventually, of course, the others had to head home. But they agreed to meet up after school and head to Tanya''s house for further explanations, so the next day Kyle and Jenny found themselves waiting behind the building for the others.


    ¡°So still no sign Ammeline has any magic?¡± Jenny asked.


    ¡°Not that I can tell,¡± Kyle said. ¡°I think that makes it more likely it was my wish that gave everyone powers. I don''t know Ammeline as well as you guys, right?¡±


    ¡°That still doesn''t tell us what you wished for though,¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°No it doesn''t,¡± Kyle sighed. ¡°Or what other chaos I caused with my wish. Maybe Ammeline''s the lucky one, this whole thing is a complicated mess.¡±


    ¡°Yeah,¡± Jenny said. ¡°I suppose it is, huh?¡±


    He was going to ask this time. He was going to ask what was bothering her. But before he could a familiar voice cut through the air.


    ¡°Hey there you are loser!¡± Danny O''Brien called out, walking across the sunlit parking lot with Benny in tow. Kyle''s first reaction was primal fear, trained into him by years of torment at Danny''s hands. His first urge was to run. But the small spark of irritation he felt at having his conversation with Jenny interrupted flickered and grew into a raging fire of pure, unadulterated fury, fueled by the memory of every time Danny had shown up and ruined his day.


    Whatever else could go wrong in the future, whatever else his sudden discover of magic might mean, he was now absolutely certain that he did not need to take Danny O''Brien''s bullshit anymore.


    ¡°Danny?¡± Kyle said. ¡°Go the hell away.¡±


    ¡°One lucky punch and you got a pretty big set of balls,¡± Benny said.


    ¡°You go away too Benny,¡± Kyle said. ¡°It''s been a complicated couple of days, and I''ve got so much bigger shit to deal with right now...I just don''t have time for you anymore.¡±


    ¡°Well you better make time!¡± Danny roared, running up to Kyle. ¡°I still owe you for that punch the other day!¡±


    His fist screamed through the air like a meteor.


    Kyle caught it by the wrist.


    ¡°No,¡± Kyle said. ¡°No. I''m just not doing this. There was never much to you, Danny. If I read you in a book I''d think you were the worst clich¨¦ in the entire world. You''re small, pointless, unimportant, and I just don''t feel like having you in my life anymore.¡±


    Danny''s face went white, his expression a mixture of fury and confusion. It looked like his brain was backfiring, completely incapable of finding a response to what was going on. Danny settled for the tried and true strategy of punching things he didn''t like, and Kyle decided to test a theory. The test was stupid, but he remembered something he''d read once. ¡°If it''s stupid and it works, it isn''t stupid.¡± And his test worked exactly like he''d pictured.


    Danny''s free hand slammed into Kyle''s face, mashing the flesh of Kyle''s cheek. But it didn''t hurt. He didn''t even cut his lip on his teeth. Kyle''s head didn''t move back in the slightest. Kyle had been right. Physical enhancement gave you durability, as well as making you stronger. He''d bene pretty sure about that with the trees, but trees were just...trees. Danny''s fist was something he''d been afraid of his entire life.


    Only now, Danny O''Brien literally couldn''t hurt him anymore.


    ¡°Are you done?¡± Kyle asked. ¡°No. No that wasn''t a question. You''re done.¡±


    He let go of Danny''s fist and faced a decision. Part of him wanted, deeply and truly wanted, to put his fist through Danny''s chest. He could picture it, and he was sure if he put enough effort behind it something like a human body wouldn''t actually offer him much resistance. He could see Danny fall to the ground, the sky visible through a bloody hole in his torso. Kyle even clenched his fist to do it.


    Later, a lot of people would insist that Danny O''Brien lived through that afternoon because Kyle was a good person. He didn''t think they were right. In that moment it wasn''t the realization that he was contemplating murder, real actual murder, that kept him from killing Danny. He was too angry to care, his conscience waited down in changed forged through close to two decades of bullying.


    No, the reason he didn''t kill Danny O''Brien was because Jenny was there.


    And with the image of the expression Jenny would have if he killed someone in front of her who couldn''t even fight back floating in front of his eyes, Kyle opened his fist and instead of the lethal haymaker he''d been about to throw he reached out and shoved Danny in the chest. Danny flew backwards four feet and landed on the asphalt, hard.


    ¡°What the hell did you just do?¡± Benny asked, his eyes wide.


    ¡°Less than I''d planned,¡± Kyle sighed. ¡°Do you want to fight too?¡±


    ¡°No,¡± Benny shook his head. ¡°Nah, I''m good.¡±


    ¡°Then take him and get out here,¡± Kyle gestured to where Denny was lying on the ground. He was conscious, his eyes clear, but he was staring up at the sky and not moving. Benny walked over and grabbed Danny''s arm to help him up.


    This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.


    Kyle actually didn''t see the transition between Danny lying on the ground and Danny lunging for him. He brought his hands up to defend himself but Benny was already holding Danny back, dragging him away. Danny had become a snarling animal. He hurled curses and threats and insults, his face so red it was almost glowing, flecks of spittle spraying from his mouth.


    ¡°You''re dead Anderman! You''re so fucking dead! I''m gonna gut you like a goddam fish you hear me? Who the hell do you think I am? You think you can get away with this? You think...¡±


    Kyle turned his back on him and walked over to Jenny.


    ¡°Sorry about that,¡± he said.


    ¡°Don''t be!¡± Jenny said. ¡°I''m really proud of you! A lot of people would have hurt him really badly for everything he did.¡±


    ¡°I almost did,¡± Kyle told her. ¡°But I knew you were watching. You saved me.¡±


    ¡°Don''t you mean him?¡± Jenny cocked her head.


    ¡°I meant what I said,¡± Kyle smiled.


    ¡°Sorry to interrupt a lovebird moment,¡± Evan said as he walked out the back of the school, ¡°but am I hearing Danny O''Brien losing his mind like a snarling animal?¡±


    ¡°Evan!¡± Kyle said. ¡°There you are. Yeah you know, no big deal, just working out some childhood trauma on the neighborhood jerk.¡±


    ¡°How many bones did you break?¡± Evan asked eagerly.


    ¡°None,¡± Kyle said. ¡°He''s not worth it.¡±


    ¡°Not sure I can agree with you there old buddy,¡± Evan said. ¡°Did you at least hit Benny a couple of times too?¡±


    ¡°Who''s hitting Benny?¡± Trevor asked, coming out of the school along with Betty. ¡°I''ll hit Benny, if someone needs to.¡±


    ¡°I didn''t hit Benny,¡± Kyle said. ¡°He was too smart to butt in.¡±


    ¡°Figures,¡± Evan sighed. ¡°The first time that big asshole was too smart for everything...¡±


    It was an even shorter walk to Tanya''s house from the school than from the antique shop, and Kyle already knew the way. He allowed himself a moment to smirk at their reactions to the teleporter, but Tanya''s glare when they arrived in the catacombs below her house dampened his mood. This time she led them past the room the three of them met in before and into a large open space.


    ¡°This looks my dojo,¡± Trevor said. ¡°Except for the stuff on the walls. We still have stuff on the walls, it''s just...different.¡±


    The items on the walls were a wide range of odd items. A spear with feathers tufted at the tip, a carving of a leering face with a fang filled mouth, a pair of marracas that shifted restlessly in the hooks they hung from.


    ¡°Alright,¡± Tanya said. ¡°This room has been enchanted to contain magic. So if there are any accidents while training, there won''t be too much collateral damage.¡±


    ¡°So it is a dojo,¡± Trevor nodded appreciatively.


    ¡°Before we start I need to know,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Has anyone been experiencing odd side effects from their magic?¡±


    ¡°No I''m fine!¡± Evan said. ¡°I can''t believe how much better my brain works now!¡±


    ¡°The real surprise being it now works at all,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°I''ll let that go because I''m so much more intelligent than you.¡±


    ¡°Ah yes,¡± Tanya sighed, rubbing her temples. ¡°I almost forgot. You decided that the intelligent thing to do was hook up magic you''ve only known existed for a few days directly to your brain without even asking about the dangers or how to do it. Are you experiencing headaches? Blurred vision? Bleeding from the ears? Hallucinations?¡±


    ¡°Nope the big purple lobster says I''m fine,¡± Evan said. ¡°And that dancing hippo over there agrees.¡±


    That got a laugh from everyone. Even Tanya''s mouth curved up at one side.


    ¡°Mental enhancement doesn''t actually make you smarter,¡± Tanya said flatly. ¡°It''s like...like adding a small computer to your brain. It improves memorization, it can make you think faster, or it can make your senses sharper. It doesn''t have anything to do with your decision making or your ability to apply that information. Perfectly memorizing a science textbook doesn''t make you an astrophysicist. Which you would know, if you had talked to me before pumping uncontrolled magic into your brain.¡±


    ¡°I kind of figured it out pretty quick after,¡± Evan said. ¡°But you know what it is good for? Games like chess which are all about recognizing patterns. I''m gonna buy everyone dinner tonight, by the way. But the point is once I had the mental enhancement, and I got to play around with it for a while...it was fun. So what if I''m not any smarter? I memorized every textbook I owned in an hour. And you wouldn''t believe what I can do with a video game now. Of course so far, the real money has been in chess.¡±


    Evan pulled out a wad of bills.


    ¡°Where did you get that?¡± Kyle demanded.


    ¡°The chess club,¡± Evan grinned. ¡°Along with a few other fringe benefits.¡±


    ¡°So you cheated,¡± Trevor said with a disapproving grimmace.


    ¡°He would hardly be the first,¡± Tanya sighed. ¡°Well if you really aren''t experiencing side effects no harm done. And I was going to recommend mental enhancement for any of you with several nodes anyway. Guided mental enhancement. One of the things it does is increase learning speed.¡±


    ¡°See? It worked out great!¡± Evan laughed. ¡°And think about it, now if I catch the tiiinyest glimpse of a woman I can hold the image in my head forever. Or replay the image over and over and...¡±


    ¡°Alright then,¡± Tanya cut him off. ¡°First things first. Checking nodes. Kyle and Trevor already did this, but the rest of you please.¡±


    She gestured to a crystal set into the wall.


    ¡°There''s one in this room too?¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°Some training can alter the nature of nodes,¡± Tanya explained. ¡°It''s useful to be able to check.¡±


    ¡°Oh yeah,¡± Evan said. ¡°Kyle told me about this.¡±


    He walked up to the wall and put his hand on the crystal. In the air above him an outline of his shape, with three glowing stars inside of it.


    ¡°Three massive nodes,¡± Tanya said.


    ¡°That''s one more than usual!¡± Evan grinned. ¡°Sounds fun!¡±


    ¡°I will kill you,¡± Tanya said casually. ¡°In case you were wondering, and to clarify, the sizes go tiny, small, average, large, massive, colossal, titanic.¡±


    ¡°Cup sizes?¡± Evan giggled.


    ¡°Evan,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°Alright alright,¡± Evan whined.


    ¡°I suppose I will go next,¡± Betty said. Her cat walked up with her. Her constellation was made of six stars.


    ¡°One massive and five large nodes,¡± Tanya said. ¡°You had to have at least one massive node to summon the five elements cat. That''s actually a perfect arrangement for you.¡±


    ¡°Why would that be?¡± Betty asked.


    ¡°I''ll explain later,¡± Tanya said, stepping up to touch the crystal. ¡°First, let me show you mine.¡±


    Evan opened his mouth to say something, but everyone''s glares made him quiet down as the image appeared on the ceiling.


    ¡°It looks a lot more complicated than ours,¡± Kyle pointed out.


    Her nodes had little lights all around them, like orbiting planets. Or maybe like flower buds sprouting from her nodes.


    ¡°That''s because she has sub nodes!¡± Jenny said. ¡°I spent last night trying to remember everything I could about magic. I''ve had a lot of masters who were sorcerers you know!¡±


    ¡°Jenny''s right,¡± Tanya nodded. ¡°I have one colossal node, two large nodes, and two small nodes. As you can see, the colossal node has the most sub nodes. That''s because I''ve dedicated my colossal node to energy projection.¡±


    ¡°Like Kyle''s enormous beam of lightning that defeated the monster,¡± Betty said.


    ¡°Exactly. That''s what would happen if I used the main node, because all it''s dedicated to is projecting energy. No control, no limits, like stabbing a hole in the side of a can of soda. Control is what the sub nodes are for. Each of those is a specific spell. So for example, I can project energy like this...¡±


    Tanya waved her hand, and one of the small bulbs growing from the huge node in her image flickered. Green light glowed from the palm of Tanya''s hand and a flour sprouted up from the floor below.


    ¡°And I make the flower grow. Nature magic is my specialty.¡±


    ¡°So the main nodes are like a generator,¡± Betty suggested. ¡°And the sub nodes are like appliances, that turn that power into something useful.¡±


    ¡°That analogy works,¡± Tanya nodded. ¡°But it isn''t perfect. Nodes dedicated to physical and mental enhancement supply power to the body and mind directly. There the sub nodes are more like...optional features. And you''ll notice my two small nodes don''t have any sub nodes at all. That''s because I''ve dedicated each of them to a specific spell. That''s good for basic abilities you plan on using all the time.¡±


    ¡°This is kind of long,¡± Evan complained.


    ¡°Well we''ve got to nail the rules down sometime,¡± Kyle told him. ¡°Better to get a general explanation out of the way now than bog everything down later when things are getting exciting.¡±


    ¡°That''s basically how things work,¡± Tanya shrugged. ¡°It''s good to know, but the point I''m trying to make is that a lot is possible. Especially with all the powerful nodes you all have between you. So start by telling me what you want to do, and I''ll tell you if it''s something you can do¡±


    ¡°Physical enhancement,¡± Trevor said instantly. ¡°I''ve got a question about physical enhancement. Is it permanent? Like can I turn it on and off?¡±


    ¡°Not exactly,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Your node is connected to your strength now. It will enhance you a little just by existing. And if you get emotional...you''ll probably call on that extra strength subconsciously.¡±


    ¡°That''s going to be a problem,¡± Trevor said. That got a few wide eyed stares. ¡°Judo. Jiu-Jitsu. Shaolin Kung Fu. I practice all three competitively. I just feel like adding magic onto that would be...I don''t know, cheating. And even if you could all convince me it wasn''t...a titanic node sounds like a lot of power. Am I right?¡±


    ¡°More power than all my nodes combined,¡± Tanya confirmed.


    ¡°So let''s say it isn''t cheating,¡± Trevor said. ¡°So I''m up there, and this guy is tougher than I thought he was. I''m holding back, but I need more strength than I''m using to land my next move. So I use it, but I use too much and...¡± Trevor shuddered at the image. ¡°I could really hurt somebody that way. And I don''t think any of the other ways to use magic are likely to suit me.¡±


    ¡°You won''t be entirely free of that effect,¡± Tanya warned him. ¡°There''s no way to close an active node without harming your body. You can train to suppress it, but you''ll still be a little stronger and faster than you would have been otherwise.¡±


    ¡°I can live with that,¡± Trevor shrugged. ¡°A little stronger and faster is fine. I''m just worried about hurting somebody. That being said, I think I might be able to help all of you.¡±


    ¡°In what way?¡± Betty asked.


    ¡°As an instructor,¡± Trevor said. ¡°The whole point is that now we''re in deep with the magic stuff we need to protect ourselves, right? So powers. Great, good. You''re all gonna be Harry Potter plus Doctor Strange multiplied by Rincewind the Wizard. But do any of you¡ªnot you Tanya, I assume you know what you''re doing, but the rest of you¡ªactually know how to fight? Not just swing your new special super strength around. Fight? I know for a fact Kyle and Evan don''t. Betty? Jenny?¡±


    ¡°I have never been very athletic,¡± Betty adjusted her glasses.


    ¡°They don''t really encourage genies to fight,¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°See?¡± Trevor looked at Tanya. ¡°If you''re better at hand to hand than I am, I''ll leave right now. It''s not like I''ve ever really fought much outside a tournament.¡±


    ¡°No,¡± Tanya shook her head. ¡°It would be extremely useful. I mostly use my physical enhancement node to avoid direct combat, and focus on my spells.¡±


    ¡°Sounds like everyone is really sure they''re going to be fighting huh?¡± Jenny said sadly.


    ¡°She has a point,¡± Kyle said. ¡°There are things we can do with magic besides fight right? You grew a pretty flower.¡±


    ¡°Yes,¡± Tanya said. ¡°A part of the reason I''m teaching all of you is so you can defend yourselves. But of course magic can do other things. And if that''s what you want to do with magic, we can pursue that.¡±


    ¡°When I was out of the lamp before people used magic for everything,¡± Jenny said. ¡°Cooking and cleaning and all kinds of things. If you don''t want to use it in competitions you don''t have to.¡±


    ¡°You don''t all have to decide today,¡± Tanya said. ¡°It''s important you learn how to protect yourselves, yes, but I was mostly planning on teaching everyone the basics anyway. That will be good for everyone, even Trevor.¡±


    That''s something we can discuss later on. For now, those basic exercises.¡±

 Chapter 13: The Breaking Point of Danny OBrien

    Danny O''Brien collapsed on his bed, rubbing the bruise on his chest. He was doing it with his left hand, because his right wrist had a bruise too where he''d been grabbed.


    Where Kyle Andermann had grabbed him.


    Benny waiting downstairs was almost entirely forgotten, because Danny''s mind was a roiling storm. Danny boiled. Danny seethed. The first time, when he''d gotten hit in the hallway? He''d been able to write it off as a lucky punch. The losers got in a lucky punch sometimes, it was something you had to live with. Like rain. Besides, he couldn''t have flown as far back as he thought he remembered, right? It was ridiculous. So he''d shrugged and forgotten about it, along with his plans for revenge.


    Until school came back in session and he saw Kyle again. And he''d thought oh yeah, I owe him a punch in the face. With interest. But when he''d gone to collect he''d discovered that he hadn''t remembered wrong. He had flown back that far. Something was different about Kyle, and the usual tactics hadn''t worked. More than that, they''d actually backfired. And there was a moment there, a horrible awful moment, when he''d felt...small.


    When he''d actually been afraid of Kyle Andermann.


    That was unacceptable. Intolerable. As the memories bubbled back to the surface of his mind he snarled at the bedroom ceiling That snarl turned into a furious roar and he began to thrash on the bed, punching and kicking the mattress. Unsatisfied he sprung off the bed and lunged at his own bedside table, throwing his lamp off it and sending it tumbling over the carpet. The impact was too soft, too weak, so he lifted a booted foot and slammed it down, over and over again, pretending he was stomping the life out of Kyle Andermann until the bedside table was nothing more than a pile of broken splinters.


    Dammit. He was going to have to come up with an excuse for why it was gone by the time his parents got back.


    Frustrating, isn''t it? The voice from the closet said.


    ¡°Shut up,¡± Danny snapped at it. ¡°You''re not real.¡±


    The voice and the glowing orange light in the closet had become an increasing problem over the past few days. It kept making suggestions, or asking annoying questions, or making fun of him.


    Then who are you talking to, Danny? The voice asked.


    ¡°Myself,¡± Danny growled.


    You can''t beat him Danny, the voice whispered. Not like you are now. He''s different, but you''re still the same. I could make you different too It would be good for both of us.


    ¡°And who the hell are you?¡± Danny snapped.


    Yourself. Remember? That''s who you said you were talking to.


    ¡°Go to hell.¡±


    I''m someone else who hates Kyle Andermann.


    ¡°Why?¡±


    He killed me.


    ¡°You sound pretty alive to me.¡±


    I''m not though, I''m dying. He blew me to pieces and blasted what was left high into the air. I had to crawl out of a smoking crater with one working arm.


    ¡°And now you''re in my closet?¡±


    I was looking for someone I could use. A brain that would work for what I need. And I found you. You''re perfect, Danny O''Brien. You''re not just the right candidate, you''ve got a grudge against the guy I need to kill.


    Danny chewed that over for a few miutes.


    ¡°You''re really dying?¡± He asked.


    Yes.


    ¡°Good.¡±


    You''re pouting like a little girl. You got beat up by the guy who was never supposed to be able to beat you. So what are you going to do about it, you big crybaby?


    ¡°You know what?¡± Danny turned to the closet door. ¡°This. I''m gonna do this about it.¡±


    He''d almost forgotten he came up here to do something. Danny yanked open the closet door. And then he stumbled back, because the air that wafted from inside was hot, too hot, hot and sweltering and miserable like the worst and sweatiest of summer days. But it wasn''t the heat or the sulfur stink of it that made Danny recoil, it was the thing lying on the floor of his closet.


    It had once been bulky and muscular and orange, but something had torn it in half. There was only one arm, a useless stump waving from it''s left shoulder. It had a chest, but it was ripped open at the stomach. In fact it''s entire lower half was gone, pulsing organs and twitching tubes of its guts spilled out around a charred nub of spine. It looked up at him with broken eyes.


    Not pretty am I? The efreet laughed in his mind.


    ¡°Hell,¡± Danny gasped, choking in the charred-hair fumes wafting from the dying thing. ¡°I thought you weren''t real.¡±


    Oh I''m real Danny. Not for much longer, but I am. That''s why I need you.


    ¡°Yeah well fuck you,¡± Danny said, grabbing a box off the top shelf. ¡°I don''t give a damn if you die, whatever the hell you are. But I''m gonna take care of Kyle Anderman. For real this time.


    Oh that thing? Yeah, yeah, good idea. Good luck with that. Tell me how it goes.


    ¡°Try to be dead by the time I get back,¡± Danny snorted.


    The session was kind of what Kyle had expected. They sat and meditated, trying to get the magical energy from their nodes to do what they wanted. Tanya seemed satisfied with everyone''s progress. At least he thought she was, it could be hard to tell with her. After they''d been at it for about an hour, she told them it was time to pack it in for the day.


    ¡°Try the exercieses on your own,¡± Tanya said. ¡°And no more playing around with your powers. The next time we meet we''ll talk about really manifesting your powers more intentionally.¡±


    ¡°Oh thank god,¡± Evan groaned, collapsing back. ¡°I couldn''t have handled sitting like that another second.¡±


    ¡°It''s pretty similar to how we sit for martial arts practice,¡± Trevor said. ¡°So I was fine.¡±


    Royal Road is the home of this novel. Visit there to read the original and support the author.


    ¡°You''re always fine,¡± Evan complained. ¡°But hey listen, I''ve got some extra money.¡±


    ¡°From scamming the chess club?¡± Trevor asked with a disapproving frown.


    ¡°Never mind how I got it,¡± Evan said. ¡°Who wants to come have dinner? My treat. Anyplace you guys wanna go except places I don''t like.¡±


    ¡°Are you guys sure...¡± Kyle was hesitant. ¡°Are you guys sure you want me along?¡±


    ¡°What?¡± Evan blinked in surprise. ¡°Yeah of course man. Why not?¡±


    ¡°Because I got you all into this mess,¡± Kyle said. ¡°I don''t know how exactly, but all of this has to come back somehow to me and my wish.¡±


    ¡°Well really...Jenny started to say, but then stopped. Everyone was staring at Kyle.


    ¡°I was never particularly bothered,¡± Betty adjusted her glasses. ¡°If had been the one to find the genie, I would have made a wish as well.¡±


    ¡°Yeah man,¡± Trevor said. ¡°I could feel resentful or jealous or whatever, but if I was in your position...I would have done exactly the same thing.¡±


    ¡°So none of you are bitter or upset with me?¡± Kyle asked. ¡°Even you, Evan?¡±


    That was the one he was having the hardest time with. Evan could be the poutiest living thing in the universe, when he decided to. And if someone had asked Kyle to describe a situation that would make Evan pout, he''d have come up with pretty much this.


    ¡°What?¡± Evan said. ¡°Expecting me to be jealous just because you''ve got incredible magic power and a sexy magical girl living in the house with you who calls you master? Or angry because getting all of that caused you to mess up my life?¡±


    ¡°Well yes,¡± Kyle said honestly.


    ¡°Nah,¡± Evan shook his head. ¡°I''ll admit it sounds like me. And I''d probably hate you if I didn''t have incredible magic power too. But I do. So I can see why you''d think I might get upset, but all I see are all the possibilities this has opened up for me. So don''t worry about it.¡±


    Kyle felt relieved. He''d been so sure everyone would hate him now, especially Evan. He was about to say so when a purple blur streaked past him and Suddenly Jenny was there, hugging Betty and Tanya so tightly their faces were turning red. Tears streamed down her pinkish purple face.


    ¡°I''m so happy!¡± Jenny said. ¡°I just got to live in the world and then I messed everything up and I was sure you were all gonna hate me!¡±


    ¡°I am in fact quite fond of you from our brief association,¡± Betty said. ¡°But I do in fact require my lungs to breathe, so I would appreciate it if you could relax your grip...¡±


    ¡°Stop it!¡± Tanya snapped. ¡°You''re getting snot on my white shirt.¡±


    ¡°Aaaaaand yep,¡± Evan said, one eye closed and fingers help up to make a square as he watched the three girls flailing together. ¡°Kaclick. Saved, recorded, and stashed in the file. The benefits of a perfect memory. You gotta try this, Kyle, it is SO much fun.¡±


    ¡°I suppose we should be grateful you can''t see through walls,¡± Tanya said primly.¡±


    ¡°I''ve still got two nodes to work with,¡± Evan said. ¡°Don''t tempt me.¡±


    ¡°I would never teach you how to do that,¡± Tanya told him.


    ¡°I could figure it out!¡± Evan countered. ¡°Now come on! Who''s coming for dinner? I''m offering free dinner.¡±


    ¡°I am amenable provided I still possess a working system of organs by the time Jenny is done with me,¡± Betty said as she finally escaped Jenny''s hug.


    ¡°Someplace where we can get chicken nuggets?¡± Jenny asked.


    ¡°You had chicken nuggets this morning,¡± Kyle pointed out.


    ¡°More!¡± Jenny said excitedly.


    ¡°It might have to be tenders but sure,¡± Evan said.


    ¡°I''m in,¡± Trevor said.


    ¡°Good luck,¡± Tanya said, turning away.


    ¡°Oh but Tanya!¡± Jenny said. ¡°You''re coming too! Right?¡±


    ¡°Yeah,¡± Kyle said. ¡°It would be pretty crappy to have you teach us all this stuff and then not invite you.¡±


    ¡°I don''t like what you''re implying,¡± Evan grumbled. ¡°But yes, of course I was including you Tanya.¡±


    ¡°Oh,¡± Tanya said, hesitating for a moment. ¡°I did not expect your invitation to include me,¡± she said. ¡°Thank you. But I am busy here. And there are a great many people cluttering up my house.¡±


    ¡°Yeah yeah we get it,¡± Evan sighed.


    ¡°Awww you should come!¡± Jenny said. ¡°We just spent all day hanging out!¡±


    ¡°That was magical training,¡± Tanya said flatly. ¡°Not hanging out.¡±


    ¡°We were all here together so what''s the difference?¡± Jenny asked. ¡°Come on!¡±


    ¡°It would be good for team building,¡± Trevor pointed out. ¡°Coach eats with us all the time.¡±


    ¡°I...¡± Tanya''s eyes narrowed at Evan. ¡°Do you understand that accepting this invitation does not mean I accept any physical contact with you, whatsoever, at any point in time?¡±


    ¡°It''s just dinner,¡± Evan told her.


    ¡°And you will sit as far away from me as possible and promise not to leave the table should I visit the restroom at any point during the evening?¡±


    ¡°You know this is a pretty long list of demands for the guy who''s offering to buy everyone dinner...¡±


    ¡°Well?¡±


    ¡°Okay okay!¡± Evan said. ¡°I promise.¡±


    ¡°Then...alright,¡± Tanya said stiffly. ¡°Give me just a moment, and I''ll come along.¡±


    ¡°Yay!¡± Jenny said, and before anyone could stop her the genie''s flying tackle had sent both her and Tanya sprawling on the ground as Tanya attempted to wriggle out of Jenny''s crushing hug.


    Ricky''s was the restaurant in town it was easiest for students to eat at.


    Oh there were bigger restaurants, and fancier restaurants, and chain restaurants, but they were all a little too inaccessible and priced a little too high for the average high school student to go to regularly. Ricky''s, on the other hand, catered specifically to them. Kyle didn''t know much about the owner, just that he was a local. They found themselves sitting around a circular table with a checkerboard pattern.


    ¡°You really got all this money cheating the chess club?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°Well some of it is from selling my body,¡± Evan waggled his eyebrows up and down.


    ¡°If you tried to sell your body you''d end up in debt,¡± Trevor said flatly.


    ¡°I''m still the one paying for the food,¡± Evan pointed out.


    ¡°How does Jenny''s magic work?¡± Betty asked. The entire table went quiet, but Tanya just sighed


    ¡°Everyone relax, Betty has the right idea. If you don''t act like it''s a secret everyone who overhears you will think you''re talking about a video game or something.¡± Everyone visibly relaxed.


    ¡°I would still like to know the answer to my question,¡± Betty pressed. ¡°Humans have magic through the system of nodes we spent the day learning about. What about genies? Or efreet?¡±


    ¡°We talked about this a little bit the first day,¡± Kyle said. ¡°She''s still got nodes, right? But they''re more specific than human nodes?¡±


    ¡°Right,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Magical creatures have a lot less control over their nodes. That''s why Jenny can only cast minor spells, her natural nodes are all going towards her wish ability. And for her they have been since birth.¡±


    ¡°Fascinating,¡± Betty adjusted her glasses. ¡°So would it...¡±


    Time wore on, and outside the restaurant Danny O''Brien waited with Benny.


    ¡°We''re gonna handle this for good,¡± Danny grumbled.


    ¡°Danny,¡± Benny said. ¡°Don''t you think maybe you oughta just...let it go?¡±


    ¡°No.¡±


    ¡°I''m just saying...¡±


    ¡°I thought we''d been over this, Benny.¡±


    ¡°Ah come on Danny,¡± Benny said. ¡°Look I don''t mind putting a little jerk in their place, or having a little fun pushing somebody around, but you''ve been getting weird lately. Weirder and weirder. The other day when Kyle distracted us from that new kid...¡±


    It had been the wrong thing to say. At the mention of Kyle''s name Danny''s face turned bright red and he let out a snarl.


    ¡°See right there man,¡± Benny said. ¡°Right there. That''s the kind of stuff I''m talking about. You''re getting crazy man!¡±


    ¡°You just make sure none of them get away once it starts.¡±


    ¡°And what if we get our asses kicked again?¡± Benny shook his head. ¡°Face it man Kyle''s been working out or something, we can''t take him anymore. Just like we can''t take that Trevor kid. Let it go.¡±


    ¡°We can take him and we will take him!¡± Danny insisted.


    ¡°Why man?¡± Benny asked desperately. ¡°Why? What''s so important about Kyle Anderman?¡±


    ¡°Kyle Anderman is a weak loser,¡± Danny said. ¡°It''s like the law of gravity. It''s just true. It''s the way of the world, the basic laws of reality. He''s got no god damn right to go around fucking up the world. He needs to stay at the bottom where he belongs. And I''m gonna remind him of that.¡±


    ¡°Yeah I''m not so sure that''s how it works, Danny,¡± Benny said, but Danny''s eyes weren''t on him anymore. They were across the street, where Kyle and a bunch of people from school were walking out of the restaurant. Benny didn''t even know Kyle had that many friends, were they in a club or something? Whatever the group was it was taking the shortcut behind the restaurant, because everyone did when they left Ricky''s. It was so much faster than crossing the street, and besides Rolling Hills was a safe town, usually.


    ¡°Know what works?¡± Danny said, reaching under his shirt. ¡°This.¡±


    Benny''s eyes went wide.


    There was no more excuse for Benny Gold than there was for Danny O''Brien. No tragic backstory. An average life, in an average home, with an inclination towards picking on people. An inclination strengthened by his association with Danny O''Brien, because it''s always easier to do things you''re not supposed to do in a group than it is alone. But there was one powerful, all important difference between the two: Unlike Danny, deep down, Benny was a decent person.


    Which was why he whirled away from Danny and started sprinting towards Kyle and the others, shouting at the top of his lungs.


    ¡°Anderman look out! Run for it! Danny''s got a gun!¡±

 Chapter 14: Extremes

    Kyle wondered later how things would have turned out if he''d moved faster. If any of them had.


    He heard Benny''s shout, they all did. They turned in the direction of the shout. But by the time Kyle''s brain had processes what Benny was saying Danny had already fired twice. Danny wasn''t very good with the gun, so the first shot went wide of everything. The second shot slammed into Benny''s knee, dropping him to the ground. As he fell, Danny''s third shot sent a spurt of blood flying up from the back of Benny''s skull. The fourth bullet hit Kyle in the chest.


    And did nothing.


    He felt pressure, like someone had jabbed him with their finger. And heat. His shirt tore. But the only sign on his body he''d been hit was a red mark on his chest.


    His first response was disbelief.


    His second was panic.


    A colossal node to body reinforcement, he thought. That''s what makes you immune to bullets And I''m the only one who has one.


    He ran at Danny. Danny was already coming towards them, but the closer he got to Danny the better chance he''d block any more bullets. Danny''s face was a mask of twisted fury, so red it looked like his blood was boiling. He wasn''t even talking, just speaking in a series of snarls and growls.


    ¡°What the fuck Danny?¡± Kyle demanded, soaking up more rounds as he caught up. He grabbed the gun from Danny''s hands and tossed it aside. Danny tried to tackle him, so he reached up and tossed Danny aside. He heard an ugly crack as Danny slammed against the wall of the restaurant.


    ¡°Did I kill him?¡± Kyle asked, whirling around.


    The others hadn''t stayed still. Tanya''s hands glowed with power, although she hadn''t used it. No one else looked hurt. Jenny and Betty were kneeling beside Benny, while Trevor was running over to restrain Danny. Evan looked shocked, standing back against the wall. He''d moved like lightning against a cat monster, but an ordinary weapon had him shaken.


    Kyle couldn''t blame him.


    ¡°No,¡± Trevor said. ¡°He''s bleeding, but he''ll live.


    Kyle was doubly relieved. First, because Danny was alive. Second because he still cared.


    ¡°Benny''s alive too,¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°But his head!¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°I am not an expert on gunshot wounds,¡± Betty said. ¡°But I think it was only a graze. He is bleeding a great deal though, and he is unconscious.¡±


    ¡°He saved us,¡± Evan said, staring at Benny. ¡°He ran in front of Danny to save our lives.¡±


    ¡°I know,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°Doesn''t fit my image of him.¡±


    ¡°I know,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°What do we do now?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°We call the police,¡± Trevor said.


    ¡°What?¡± Evan shook his head. ¡°Don''t be ridiculous. Call them and say what?¡±


    ¡°No she''s right,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Nothing openly magical happened here. And Benny needs medical attention. We need to call the authorities.¡±


    Jenny walked up and put her arms around Kyle''s waist. He put his own arm around her shoulders.¡±


    ¡°Hey,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Are you okay?¡±


    ¡°I''m used to duels,¡± Jenny said. ¡°I''m kind of sad they still happen like this after thousands of years though.¡±


    ¡°Trust me,¡± Kyle shook his head. ¡°This isn''t normal.¡±


    He walked over to where Trevor was holding Danny down. Danny was just starting to regain his senses, blood from a cut lip running down his chin. He glared daggers at Kyle.


    ¡°I''ll kill you,¡± he said.


    ¡°Why?¡± Kyle asked. ¡°That''s the part I can''t figure out, Danny. Why? What''s the point? Is beating me up that important to you?¡±


    ¡°You humiliated me,¡± Danny snarled.


    ¡°There was nobody around!¡± Kyle said desperately. ¡°Do you even realize you shot Benny in the head?¡±


    ¡°Serves him right,¡± Danny spat. ¡°Fucking traitor. I had to show him. Had to show you both.¡±


    ¡°Show us what?¡±


    ¡°That you''ve got a fucking place!¡± Danny roared. ¡°You''re weak, Trevor''s strong. That''s how it''s supposed to be. That''s how it''s supposed to stay. Things aren''t supposed to shift around like that. It''s not right. It''s wrong. Wrong. I''ve got to put you back where you''re supposed to be. I''ve got to make it right.¡±


    ¡°Yeesh,¡± Trevor shook his head. ¡°That''s a pretty messed up way to look at the world.¡±


    Kyle thought it was more than messed up. He thought Danny was insane. Had he always been insane? Had hitting him a couple of times made him insane?


    There had always been something wrong with Danny. Kyle had known that since they were kids, since the day with the dragonfly. But could Kyle have made it worse? Could the wish have done this to him?


    That last thought was a poisonous worm, and it wriggled down deep into the bottom of his mind. He could feel it down there, squirming around. Having no way to get it out he ignored it, the way people always do with thoughts like that, because they have bigger problems. But it didn''t exactly go away.


    ¡°Police are coming,¡± Eric said. ¡°Hey Kyle, man, are you alright?¡±


    ¡°Yeah I...¡± Kyle shook his head. ¡°Yeah. I''m doing okay, I think. I''m the one who''s bulletproof.¡±


    ¡°You are also the one who was shot,¡± Betty pointed out. ¡°And Danny came here to kill you.¡±


    ¡°It won''t be the last time,¡± Tanya said flatly. ¡°If people find out you''re Master to the last genie, any number of them could try to attack you.¡±


    ¡°Oh,¡± Jenny said, wilting against Kyle''s side. ¡°Yeah. I suppose that''s true.¡±


    ¡°Maybe I should go away then,¡± Kyle said, forcing a tight smile. ¡°I mean, that''s what they usually do when stuff like this comes up in the TV shows right?¡±


    ¡°And it''s always a stupid idea and they almost get killed,¡± Evan pointed out.


    ¡°And what makes you think physical distance will help protect people your enemies know you''re close to?¡± Tanya snapped. ¡°Leaving won''t do anything. You all have to learn to defend yourselves. Granted, this doesn''t seem connected to anything magical....¡±


    This story has been unlawfully obtained without the author''s consent. Report any appearances on Amazon.


    Behind them, the blood running down Danny''s chin finally dripped onto the floor. As soon as it splashed onto the ground, it caught fire.


    The explosion that followed threw Danny back against the wall and tossed Trevor three feet away. The fires from the blast didn''t dissipate, the flickered and hovered in the air, flowing into a ring of flames. At first that ring was just a hoop, but the air inside it folded like paper and through it Kyle could see and endless ocean of rolling lava. That view was then blocked by the snarling, shovel shaped head of some many fanged beast.


    ¡°However it isn''t impossible I''m wrong,¡± Tanya amended. ¡°Run. Everyone except Kyle needs to run right now!¡±


    ¡°What''s going on?¡± Evan asked.


    ¡°He''s opened a portal to the domain of fire somehow,¡± Tanya said. ¡°No I don''t have time to explain that! I need to close it, and Kyle is the only one of you with nodes open who can help protect me from that thing while I do it! Now run!¡±


    ¡°That thing¡± had started to crawl out through the hole. It had a body like a little bit like a wasp, three oval parts linked together, though its head looked more like some kind of armored dinosaur. It had eight legs, four coming from it''s chest and four from the rear oval that made up it''s body. Once it was through the portal it reared up, and Kyle could see the front four legs were actually scythelike claws. The whole creature glowed red and orange like lava.


    ¡°She''s right,¡± Trevor said. ¡°We can''t help here. Come on!¡±


    There were protests, but Kyle was glad to hear the others being pulled away by Trevor.


    ¡°Kyle,¡± Tanya said, with a grim note in her voice. ¡°You should know. One of the things that could summon a portal like that is an efreet. Or...it could teach a human to do it.¡±


    Kyle nodded, shoving the thought to the back of his mind. He''d have to deal with it later. Right now, there was a monster in the alley with them.


    ¡°Should I hit it with my laser thing like the other night?¡± He asked.


    ¡°Of course not you idiot!¡± Tanya snapped. ¡°You''ll destroy the whole street! And kill everyone on it! Just punch it!¡±


    ¡°It''s made of fire!¡± Kyle pointed out.


    ¡°It will take much hotter fire than that to burn you,¡± Tanya said. ¡°And I''m busy!¡±


    That much Kyle could see. She stood with her arms raised towards the portal, and now that he looked the fire had started to get a green tinge to it. Other creatures moved though the hole in the air, but none of them tried to come though. Kyle didn''t get the specifics, but Tanya must be using her powers to close the portal.


    And from how hard she was sweating, she obviously didn''t have enough energy to try and focus on anything else. So when the monster charged at her, Kyle did as she''d told him and punched it as hard as he could.


    The force of the blow threw the monster into the wall, cracking the bricks and scorching everything it touched. It snarled in pain and surprise, claws scrabbling against the alley pavement as it lunged back in Kyle''s direction. It was more wary this time, so it lunged under his blow and swung its bladed arms at him. Kyle grabbed for them on reflex, and by either luck or instinct he grabbed the two that were going in for fatal blows. He stopped the one that would have sliced open his gut, as well as the one that would have pierced him through the heart.


    But the other two landed, slicing bloody gashes in his shoulder and hip. On top of that Kyle realized too late grabbing blades headed for you isn''t exactly the best way to block them, and the wounds that really hurt were the ones sliced into his fingers and palms where he''d caught the monsters scything legs. Kyle kicked it in the chest, knocking it back again.


    ¡°Does this thing disappear if we close the portal?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°Do you disappear if you close the door to your house?¡± Tanya snapped, her voice strained with the effort of trying to close the burning ring. ¡°Once I have this closed I can help you kill it!¡±


    ¡°How long will that be?¡±


    ¡°When. The portal. Is closed.¡± Tanya grunted out every word.


    Kyle supposed that was fair enough. And boy would it be nice to have someone who knew actual magic magic to help fight the thing. It wasn''t as strong as the efreet, but he couldn''t use the explosive beam he''d killed that with for reasons already discussed and in close combat the thing was sharp and pointy. He kind of wished he had a sword, not that he''d have any idea what to do with one of he did.


    It was coming back at him with the bladed arms again. He supposed the good news was that it was completely ignoring Tanya at this point. Well that made sense Kyle was the one actually attacking it, it probably figured it could kill Tanya once Kyle was dead. If it was the kind of thing that could figure things in the first place, and not just a mindless monster acting on instinct.


    He still didn''t know which it was when it turned it''s attention to Benny. Did it know going for the unconscious man would distract him? Was it just lunging for the closest piece of meat? No way to tell, but Kyle couldn''t let it get Benny. Kyle had conflicting feelings about Benny Gold, but one thing was clear: Benny had been trying to save Kyle''s life. They could sort out all the rest later. Besides, Benny being in danger was their fault now. Until the thing turned towards him with slavering jaws, Kyle had completely forgotten he was there.


    Kyle pumped his legs to get ahead of the monster and snatched Benny out of the way at the very last second. The monster reared up and screamed, but Kyle punched it in the jaw. The creature''s jaw hung loose and it stumbled, giving Kyle time to dash away and place Benny on the ground behind Tanya.


    ¡°Why are you leaving him here!?¡± Tanya demanded.


    ¡°This is a close to out of the way as I can get!¡± Kyle snapped back. ¡°Just focus on closing that portal!¡±


    ¡°I am!¡± Actually, even Kyle could tell she was making progress, the hole had shrunk down to the size of a dinner plate. Behind it the monster was shaking the stars out of it''s head. Soon it would be on the attack again. The frustrating thing was that Kyle was sure he was strong enough to kill it, he just wasn''t good enough. He had no idea how to use all this power he''d wished himself into having. He had exactly two tricks. The super strength, which was only half working, and...


    Oh.


    Oh that was an idea.


    That was a very bad idea.


    No not just bad, stupid.  But with what he could do, right now, he thought it had the best chance of getting both him and Tanya out alive, if it didn''t kill them both first. And he didn''t have a lot of time to debate it. The monster was coming. He ran out to meet it. This time, when it lunged at him, Kyle rolled backwards, landing on the floor with the creature above him. As he went down, he focused on what he''d done the other night, the explosive blast of energy that had torn into the efreet. Maybe, just maybe, if he fired it straight up it wouldn''t do as much collateral damage.


    That plan had a lot of maybes in it, which he didn''t like. He just didn''t have anything better. But he was saved from his maybes by the last person he''d expected to swoop in for the rescue.


    Evan.


    The monster raised it''s scythe claws and he was just about to reach it when something else swung into his field of vision, beyond the monster''s head. Evan flew through the air, a rusty pipe pulled back behind his shoulders like a baseball bat. He feel towards the monster and slammed the pipe against the back of it''s skull. There was an ugly crack, and steaming orange ichor began to pour from the monster''s head. It stumbled away from Kyle with a gurgling roar as Evan landed on the alley floor. It looked like he was going for a fist-down superhero landing, but he spun in the air just before he touch down and winded up on his back.


    Kyle ran in and put every ounce of strength he could muster into a single, vicious uppercut that blasted the monster''s head to pieces. Burning orange blood splattered on him and scorched away more of his shirt, but it did nothing to his skin so he ignored it. The monster''s body began to steam, melting away into nothingness even as he watched. He looked over at Tanya. The portal was barely the size of a quarter now. She gave him a quick nod and he turned his attention to Evan, who was picking himself up off the floor, apparently none the worse for wear.


    ¡°Oof,¡± Evan grunted. ¡°Don''t have the hang of that yet.¡±


    ¡°What happened?¡± Kyle asked. ¡°Where did you come from?¡±


    ¡°I kind of ran and jumped off the wall over there,¡± Evan gestured. ¡°It was pretty cool until the part where I was landing, right?¡±


    ¡°That''s not what I meant.¡±


    ¡°Yeah I know, but come on Kyle''s it''s pretty obvious. I did what you did. I put a colossal node into physical enhancement. Well, I think I did I concentrated really really hard on being stronger and faster and it seemed to work.¡±


    ¡°That was reckless and stupid,¡± Tanya said, sounding exhausted. She had finished closing the portal and walked over to them. ¡°But I will admit that since the monster seemed to have Kyle at a disadvantage, It might have been the best idea.¡±


    ¡°Well actually I had a plan,¡± Kyle said, and told them. It was a mistake.


    ¡°You what?¡± Tanya sputtered. ¡°Of all the stupid, ridiculous, reckless...you''d have emptied your core, still wrecked the buildings, and probably killed us both! What the hell were you--¡±


    There was a horrible listless moment where Kyle didn''t understand what was going on. It took less than a second, but he fit a full week''s worth of confusion into that small space of broken time. Tanya had stopped talking, and there had been some other noise that interrupted her. And she was moving strangely. And she was bleeding. Blood was flying from her shoulder.


    A gunshot. Tanya had been shot. The wide eyed expression on her face made a lot more sense now.


    Tanya had been shot.


    Reality caught up. He grabbed Tanya and pulled her aside, putting himself between her and Danny. They''d all forgotten about Danny, lying in the alley while all the action was going on. Danny, apparently, hadn''t forgotten he was turning into a homicidal maniac. His eyes were crazed as he held the gun on them, weaving slightly.


    ¡°Kill you!¡± Danny managed to sputter out. He tossed the gun aside and started to run towards them. Kyle never knew what the hell Danny thought he was going to do, but it didn''t matter. Because that was when the cop car appeared in the mouth of the alley and the doors burst open. They hadn''t even noticed the sirens getting closer, with everything else going on. The sudden appearance of the flashing lights was enough to make Danny stop and turn, and a few moments later he went down under the weight of three uniformed deputies.

 Chapter 15: Explanations

    Jenny hadn''t had time to work out a story with the others, but they''d given her a quick crash course on how the police worked in modern America. In some ways a lot less powerful than the city guards she was used to, and in some ways a lot more. But she wasn''t here to compare modern and ancient methods of law enforcement, she was there to ¡°give a statement.¡± Which was a fancy way of saying she was supposed to tell the police what happened.


    Leaving out stuff about monsters and magic, because that was still all a secret.


    The woman in the blue uniform listening to her story seemed nice enough. The uniform didn''t look like very good armor, but again she wasn''t here to learn about law enforcement.


    ¡°...and when he started shooting we ran away,¡± Jenny finished up. ¡°Kyle stayed behind, to protect us.¡±


    ¡°Did Kyle think he could fight someone with a gun?¡± the policewoman asked.


    ¡°Kyle knew Danny was after him,¡± Jenny said. ¡°He knew the danger would be wherever he was.¡±


    ¡°Kyle sounds like quite a guy,¡± the policewoman muttered as she wrote in her notebook.


    ¡°Yeah,¡± Jenny said. ¡°He is!¡±


    Something in her voice made the policewoman smile.


    ¡°I think we''ve got what we need here,¡± the policewoman said. ¡°You can probably go home soon, miss Ragbah. There''s going to be some paperwork, but what happened here seems pretty obvious.¡±


    ¡°Is everyone else okay?¡± Jenny asked nervously. ¡°The healers...the ambulance people, I mean...they said Tanya was going to be okay, but...¡±


    ¡°Well your one friend is still unconscious,¡± the policewoman said. ¡°The other girl is getting patched up. They''re both in the hospital. Everyone else is fine. They''re giving their own statements.¡±


    ¡°...so I grabbed everyone else and we got out of there,¡± Trevor finished. ¡°Well except Kyle and Tanya. Then there were all these bangs and explosions.¡±


    ¡°Why did Tanya stay behind?¡± the officer taking his statement asked.


    ¡°You''d have to ask her,¡± Trevor shrugged. ¡°I don''t understand half the stuff she does. Less than half, lately.¡±


    Trevor was very proud of himself. That was an awful lot of not quite lying. Trevor had never liked lying, but the world was the world. He''d gotten pretty good at this part.


    ¡°Danny has always been a bully,¡± Betty said intensely, adjusting her glasses. ¡°But he''s never been quite so viciously violent before. And he has never used a weapon. I must admit, despite the fact that my life was in immediate danger I am fascinated by what could have prompted him to take such sudden and drastic action. Admittedly, his recent setbacks at Kyle''s hands are an obvious motive, but the violence certainly seems sharp and sudden, doesn''t it? But perhaps he was always like that, below the surface, boiling away until something triggered and eruption. And that trigger happened to by Kyle. I wonder if...¡±


    ¡°Miss Peltzer...¡± the officer said desperately.


    ¡°...someone else defying him would be enough? Evan, for example. He has also bullied Evan, to a lesser degree, over the course of most of their lives. Would Evan suddenly refusing to be bullied have the same effect? Although I expect the arrival of Jenny into the situation has had a great deal to do with Danny''s reaction. I have always ascribed bullying, and indeed a great many male behaviors, to competition for mating rights left over from our days as wild animals. Of course, the same could probably be said for...¡±


    ¡°Miss Peltzer!¡± the officer shouted frantically. ¡°It''s over! We''re done here! You can go! You can stop talking now!¡±


    ¡°So soon?¡± Betty blinked. ¡°Oh, it seems to have gotten late. You''re right, officer, I should be going.¡±


    ¡°Yes go,¡± the officer sighed, looking down at his pages and pages of notes. ¡°Please.¡±


    ¡°Just like pwing!¡± Evan said, leaping up in his chair, his arms waving in the air. ¡°Kapwoosh! And then like BAM! And I then I ran back and Kyle was kinda down, so I tried to get the monster off him, and--¡±


    ¡°Right,¡± the officer said, rubbing his forehead like he had a headache. ¡°Got it. If you could please sit down? I suppose it''s not surprising you think of him as a monster...¡±


    ¡°Oh right,¡± Evan said. ¡°Yeah Danny, that is one hundred percent definitely what I mean. So anyway, then it was like gakow! And...¡±


    ¡°...and that''s when you guys rolled up,¡± Kyle said. He''d kept the details vague, just like they''d agreed in hurried whispers while they were being taken in. Danny showed up with the gun, fight, things got more dangerous, everyone ran, Kyle and Tanya stayed behind, fight, explosion. Why the explosion? Couldn''t say officer. It was a wonderful sneaky phrase, couldn''t say. Because one of the reasons you couldn''t say might be that you''d get in trouble if you did say. A chance to wave away the worst of transgressions without having to lie.


    But there''d been no hiding the weariness, and he finished his story with his head hanging in his hands.


    ¡°I just don''t get it,¡± Kyle mumbled. ¡°He was crazy. I mean he''s always been a bully. No surprise there. I just never thought he''d go this far. Because I fought back a couple of times?¡±


    ¡°Couldn''t speak to that sir,¡± the policewoman said, writing something down in her notebook. The official version of ¡°couldn''t say.¡± She probably wasn''t supposed to commiserate too much with witnesses. But something broke, and the look she gave Kyle was pure sympathy. ¡°Listen, you and your friends did alright, in a situation like that. Maybe you should have run with your friends, but I get what you were thinking. And calling us as soon as things started was smart. As for the rest of it, I can''t help you. But you got to the other side and you''re okay. You understand?¡±


    Taken from Royal Road, this narrative should be reported if found on Amazon.


    ¡°Yeah,¡± Kyle said, with a small sad smile. ¡°I understand. I just wish I understood, that''s all.¡±


    ¡°Sometimes it can be hard to understand people,¡± the officer nodded. ¡°Impossible, even.¡±


    Danny sat in the tiny little room, waiting for his lawyer.


    He didn''t know if he had a lawyer. He probably did, or at least his dad could get one. He wondered if he was going to jail. But the thought was distant. Unimportant. He would go, or he wouldn''t. What would Jail mean anyway? Not doing the things he usually did? The normal things didn''t seem to matter anymore.


    It was like when Kyle Anderman punched him the world had turned to ash in his fingers. Like with that one piece of the universe out of place, with Kyle Anderman capable of fighting back, everything else was ruined. Every time he tried to explain it the anger welled up inside him again. Why did there need to be a reason? It was wrong, that''s all. It was just wrong. He couldn''t even say he''d never thought he would react this way, because until it happened he''d never considered a world where it could happen.


    And that, of course, was the problem with Danny O''Brien. Danny O''Brien was, unfortunately, not complicated. Danny O''Brien had spent his entire life hammering the world into a shape his mind was comfortable with. A mind that was damaged¡ªor maybe better to say defective, since as previously mentioned this had come about through no particular trauma¡ªand required that forced environment to remain stable. Maybe it could be described as a form of obsessive compulsive disorder, like those people who have to have their carpet threads exactly straight or all the pictures on their walls arranged in descending order of size. Kyle Anderman was a picture out of place, and Danny couldn''t handle it.


    You''re pretty messed up huh kid? Said the voice from his closet. Yeah, I picked the right guy.


    ¡°Shut up,¡± Danny grumbled. The monster''s burning, bleeding face had appeared in the reflections of the metal table Danny sat behind. ¡°You knew the gun wouldn''t work.¡±


    I was pretty sure yeah. You needed to learn how outgunned you are.


    ¡°And the fire monster. That was you.¡±


    Placed the spell on you when you grabbed the gun. A portal to the realm of fire, whenever your blood touched the ground and completed the spell. It won''t work again, of course.


    ¡°It didn''t work this time,¡± Danny pointed out. ¡°That thing didn''t get Kyle.¡±


    I''ve got bigger plans than killing Kyle. Although that''s on the list. Think of it like a sample. That''s a little trick I know. You wanna really get strong enough to beat that kid?


    Danny glared at the reflected monster.


    Well?


    Before he could answer the door open. A man he didn''t recognize stood in the doorway holding a briefcase. The man reached the table in a few quick steps and sat down, placing the briefcase on the table.


    ¡°Danny,¡± the man in the suit said. ¡°My name is Thomas Crowell, I''ve been hired as your defense attorney. How have they treated you?¡±


    ¡°Told me what I was charged with and left me in here,¡± Danny said. ¡°he list was pretty fucking long. And most of it''s bullshit. I didn''t have any kind of bomb.¡±


    ¡°We''ll discuss our response to the specific charges at a later time,¡± Crowell said with a deep breath. ¡°First, I''m afraid I have to deliver some bad news. It connects to why your father isn''t with me today.¡±


    ¡°Now what?¡± Danny snorted.


    ¡°Danny...I''m afraid your mother was killed this afternoon,¡± Crowell said. Dany started, and shot up in the chair. ¡°There was a fire. The rest of your family is alright, but your mother was right at the center of it when it started. In your-¡±


    ¡°Bedroom closet,¡± Danny finished without thinking. The lawyer gave him a sharp look.


    ¡°Do not repeat that until we discuss your plea,¡± Crowell hissed at him. ¡°the current theory is that she disturbed the material you used to make the bomb that charred up the alleyway the way it was. Your father and sister are at a hotel, and he''s taking it...rather hard. He told me to handle everything in relation to this matter, and money was no object. But he did tell me to tell you he...it may be a while before he''s ready to talk to you, Danny.¡±


    ¡°There was no damn bomb,¡± Danny insisted. ¡°But there was...there was something in the closet, that could catch fire. But I didn''t make any fucking bomb.¡±


    ¡°Whether there was or not my job is to defend you to the best of my ability,¡± Crowell said, opening his briefcase. ¡°We''re going to go over a few things. But the short version is you don''t talk, you don''t say anything, you answer no questions, you volunteer no information. We''re in lockdown mode until things are a little more clear.¡±


    Danny shrugged, his mind racing. His mother was dead. It didn''t seem real. Oh he believed it, it just didn''t feel solid somehow. Like he''d heard about it happening to someone else. Possibly even stranger, he couldn''t exactly decide if he cared. Which even he had to admit was screwed up. Had he always been this screwed up? Close to it, probably. He must have been close to going insane his whole life.


    Anderman. That''s what had done it. That''s what had broken him to the point where he didn''t even care that his own mother died. If that little shit had just stayed in his fucking place this would all have been fine. And Danny had never been more sure that he was going to kill Kyle Andermann. On top of everything else, he couldn''t let somebody get away with killing his mom could he? Even if he didn''t give a shit.


    He couldn''t help himself, the thought made him start laughing. Crowell had been in the middle of a sentence, and he gave Danny the strangest look. Which just made Danny laugh more. And in the reflection on the metal table, he caught the eye of a grinning orange-red face and gave a small nod.


    They''d talk later.


    Kyle only had a little time to talk to everyone after their interviews were over. Worried parents wanted to take their children home. He''d met Betty''s parents before. They were as pale and stone faced as their daughter, although where her father shared Betty''s glossy black hair, combed over his bald spot with mechanical precision, her mother''s hair was brown and always hung down wildly around her head.


    ¡°Are you alright?¡± Her father asked in a voice which did not change tone even once.


    ¡°We were worried sick,¡± her mother said, sounding like she was about to go to sleep.


    ¡°Mother.¡± Betty said, adjusting her glasses. ¡°Father. I am perfectly alright. Kyle and Evan would not have let anything happen to me.¡±


    ¡°Yes of course,¡± Kyle''s mother yawned. ¡°You should know we don''t blame you, Kyle. You''ve always been a good friend to Betty. Danny O''Brien isn''t your fault.¡±


    ¡°Thanks,¡± Kyle said, a little uncomfortably. He''d been about to apologize for dragging their daughter into his mess.


    ¡°And you must be Jenny,¡± her father said. ¡°I wish we could meet under better circumstances, and I hope we will. For today, we really should get Betty home.¡±


    ¡°Nice to meet you!¡± Jenny waved goodbye to them, a huge smile on her face.


    ¡°I think that''s a little too perky for the situation,¡± Kyle pointed out.


    ¡°I know,¡± Jenny wilted. ¡°I just don''t know what to do now.¡±


    ¡°You''re not alone,¡± Kyle muttered.


    Evan came out next.


    ¡°Hey guys,¡± he said. ¡°Listen, we got a lot to talk about but I am dog tired. Tomorrow?¡±


    ¡°Your dad''s not coming?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°He''s still in China,¡± Evan shrugged. ¡°I''ll be fine. That was freaking awesome today. Did you see me?¡±


    ¡°I didn''t see you,¡± Jenny admitted. ¡°But I''m sure you were super impressive!¡±


    ¡°Yeah I saw you,¡± Kyle couldn''t help but smirk. Evan was just so enthusiastic about the magic powers. ¡°I had him though.¡±


    ¡°Sure sure,¡± Kyle laughed, already walking away. ¡°Heading home. I''ll see you guys in the morning.¡±


    ¡°Well I guess we''d better head home too,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°I could use nuggets,¡± Jenny sighed, leaning against Kyle''s side. ¡°We really can''t go see Tanya in the hospital?¡±


    ¡°We''ll go tomorrow,¡± Kyle shook his head. ¡°Visiting hours are way over by now. I''m not positive she wants to see us anyway.¡±


    They had just started away from the police station when a cab drove up and Kyle''s grandfather burst from the door.


    ¡°There you kids are!¡± the old man shouted. ¡°Are you alright?¡±


    ¡°We''re fine,¡± Kyle said, glaring. ¡°But I want to talk to you.¡±


    ¡°I''m sure you do,¡± the old man sighed. ¡°Come on, get in the cab.¡±

 Chapter 16: Wish Me Harder, Master! (Part 1)

    ¡°So start talking,¡± Kyle said once they were in the cab and driving.


    ¡°When we get home,¡± his grandfather said.


    ¡°No,¡± Kyle insisted. ¡°Now. My worst enemy just showed up with magical fire powers out of nowhere and tried to kill me. The time for holding things back is officially over.¡±


    ¡°I don''t know anything about that,¡± the old man scratched the back of his head. ¡°Seriously, boy, I only know so much. Anyone in the antique business knows about magic. They have to, where do you think all the mystical artifacts turn up? And about Uzbedi, of course. They''ve got a lock on the magical antiques market. Oh they pay pretty good, but if you sell to anyone else they come after you hard.¡±


    ¡°So you knew about magic because of your work,¡± Kyle nodded. ¡°Which doesn''t answer the question of where the hell you''ve beenthe past few days.¡±


    ¡°I thought that was obvious boy,¡± he sounded surprised. ¡°I''ve been in Uzbedi.¡±


    ¡°You have?¡± Jenny asked eagerly. ¡°What''s it like?¡±


    ¡°Same as always,¡± his grandfather said. ¡°Oh. I suppose probably a lot different since the last time you were there. But I mostly just saw the airport and the old palace. I had to register a magical artifact. The Uzbedi''s aren''t complete jerks. If someone gets bound to a magical artifact somehow, so they can''t take it without killing somebody, they''ll leave it where it is. But they want a record of where it is, so they can keep an eye on things.¡±


    ¡°Me,¡± Jenny realized. ¡°I''m the magical artifact. You were registering me.¡±


    ¡°Well the lamp technically,¡± his grandfather shrugged. ¡°But yeah, you''ve got the basic idea.¡±


    ¡°So what about Danny?¡± Kyle pressed. ¡°And the efreet?¡±


    ¡°I don''t know,¡± his Grandfather said. ¡°Got no idea about any of that. Except one, but I''m sure you thought of it already.¡±


    Kyle and Jenny caught each other''s eyes. They had, but they hadn''t wanted to say it out loud.


    Somehow, this all must be fallout from Kyle''s wish.


    And then...weeks passed. And the abnormal became normal.


    ¡°HYAAAHHHHH!¡±


    The whole world was spin wildy right up until the moment Kyle''s head hit the mat. It didn''t hurt, but it felt like it should have. He was a lot less concerned about the wound to his dignity. After the past couple of weeks he was pretty sure it was about as damaged as it could.


    ¡°Ow,¡± he said. Out of protest, in the name of the pain he ought to be feeling.


    ¡°You''re doing really well,¡± Trevor told him, reaching out a hand. ¡°Most people don''t learn this fast. It''s just, you know. I''m lots better than you.¡±


    ¡°Thanks,¡± Kyle laughed, accepting the hand.


    ¡°And the fact that I''ve been doing this my whole life probably has something to do with it,¡± Trevor admitted with a shrug.


    ¡°Yeah little bit,¡± Kyle said, looking around the room. They were in the large empty hall in Tanya''s basement where they''d met the first time they came to practice magic. All around them the others were practicing in various ways. Tanya sat with Betty on the ground, waving their hands over the sleeping five elements cat. Jenny, her nodes already set to her natural magical powers, had decided she should learn martial arts as well. She was doing some practices Trevor ha given her, kicking a wooden post over and over. Evan had a stack of books, which he was using to expand the total knowledge stored in his magical computer brain.


    ¡°You still don''t want to try learning anything yourself?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°It does look kinda fun,¡± Trevor shook his head. ¡°I mean who wouldn''t want magic powers? But everything I said is still true, even after Danny....¡±


    ¡°Yeah,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Danny.¡±


    ¡°Oh hell I''m sorry man,¡± Trevor shook his head.


    ¡°No I mean...¡± Kyle sighed. ¡°What are we supposed to do? Never talk about it?¡±


    Tanya had investigated the portal summoned by Danny''s blood¡ªshe hadn''t said how¡ªand had determined it was a spell cast on him by the same efreet they''d fought, and not a magical power of Danny''s. Danny''s house burning down the same day was obviously connected, they didn''t know how. This meant the efreet was still lurking around somewhere, and was probably the real threat, but Kyle''s thoughts kept wandering back to Danny just the same. Strangely enough, after everything, what Kyle felt most was...guilty.


    Alright, Danny had obviously been a psycho already. But was there anything Kyle could have done better? Could he have prevented everything? Saved Danny''s mother? Helped Danny? He tried to push the thoughts aside, brush them under the mental carpet. They went, but they weren''t happy about it, peeking sullenly out from under the fabric.


    ¡°I do not understand,¡± Tanya sighed, ceasing her chanting and looking across at Betty. ¡°Your bond is strong. Very strong. But he won''t respond to your mental commands.¡±


    ¡°Is that so weird?¡± Evan asked from his pile of books. ¡°I mean, it''s a cat.¡±


    ¡°It could be that,¡± Tanya sighed. ¡°I don''t know much about five elements cats. Just not listening to commands is pretty normal cat behavior.¡±


    ¡°I am getting more information through our bond at least,¡± Betty said. ¡°For example, I now understand that his name is Moonlight.¡±


    ¡°Mrow,¡± the cat complained, looking up at her.


    ¡°Well he says his name is actually hunter by moonlight who rends more rodents than can be counted on a thousand paws,¡± Betty corrected. ¡°But that is very difficult to say.¡±


    The cat seemed to shrug again, then went back to licking his paw.


    ¡°Let''s just finish up for the day,¡± Tanya sighed. ¡°Everyone put everything back where you found it.¡±


    ¡°That was fun!¡± Jenny said while everyone else was packing up. ¡°Do you think Betty will let me hold the kitty?¡±


    ¡°I don''t know how familiars work,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Is it okay to pet someone''s familiar? Please be very careful that nothing you are about to say contains the word pussy.¡±


    ¡°But I was just going to say I bed she''d enjoy it if I....¡±


    ¡°I knew it!¡± Kyle said. ¡°You are a dirty joke magnet, you know that Jenny? You attract them from across the room, and the next thing you know it''s all over your face.¡±


    Kyle came up short.


    ¡°Dammit,¡± he sighed. ¡°I fell right into that one, didn''t I? I''ve got no one to blame but myself.¡±


    ¡°What do you mean?¡± Jenny asked blankly. ¡°Anyway, something''s got Betty all excited.¡±


    Kyle ignored that with every ounce of will that he possessed and turned his focus to Betty as they walked out of Tanya''s house. She was acting agitated. So agitated that even someone who didn''t know her well would noticed, breaking the monotone flatness she usually gave off. The cat in her arms was staring straight up at her face, and although it wasn''t making a sound he could almost swear that it was...scolding her.


    ¡°Is the cat doing something bad?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°Probably not,¡± Jenny said. ¡°Familiars act as advisers to their masters. He''s probably just giving Betty some advice.¡±


    Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.


    ¡°What kind of advice would get her like that?¡± Kyle wondered, but then the cat reached up a paw and turned Betty''s head in Evan''s direction. Then he understood.


    To his surprise, Betty started moving towards Evan with what could only be called purpose.


    ¡°Ev-Evan!¡± Betty stammered.


    ¡°What''s up?¡± Evan asked.


    ¡°Well it was simply that for some time I have noticed your more positive qualities, in the light of everything you have experienced, and I was wondering if perhaps you might be interested in, even though it is not normally the type of activity you engage in, perhaps you would enjoy...¡±


    Moonlight reached up a paw and slapped Betty across the face.


    ¡°I was wondering if you would please come to the spring dance with me!¡± Betty blurted out, shouting so hard her eyes closed and her fists clenched in front of her. In the aftermath of her outburst the world seemed to go totally quiet, an explosion of silence that burst out from Betty and Evan until it blanketed the entire world. All eyes fell on Evan, who sheepishly scratched the back of his head.


    ¡°Ah hell Betty,¡± Evan said. ¡°I don''t, I mean...I already asked somebody.¡±


    Kevin''s entire world came to a screeching halt. When did thishappen?


    ¡°I asked Goldie,¡± Evan said. ¡°From the chess club. I mean, I sort of got into Chess ever since I got the mental enhancement, and she kept asking me for rematches, so we kinda got to know each other and...yeah.¡± Evan''s face looked like he was trying to have two expressions at the same time. One sympathetic and making a desperate apology, the other terrified and desperately trying to run away. ¡°Sorry.¡±


    Every line on Betty''s body had gone still.


    ¡°Th-there is no need to apologize,¡± Betty said, adjusting her glasses. ¡°I should of course had considered something like that must have happened. If you will all please excuse me.¡±


    And then she didn''t exactly run away, but it was a pretty fast escape all the same.


    Kyle tried to go after Betty, but he couldn''t find where she went and she wasn''t answering her phone. Finally he and Jenny just went back to the antique shop, which turned out to be the right call because they found Betty sitting on the steps hanging her head in her hands. Moonlight stood on the steps beside her, gently stroking her with a paw like she was the cat.


    ¡°Betty!¡± Kyle said. ¡°We were worried about you!¡±


    ¡°I am quite alright,¡± Betty said miserably. ¡°I am, perhaps, reevaluating my life choices beginning with my birth and discovering that my existence is nothing but a long litany of terrible mistakes, but I am otherwise alright.¡±


    ¡°Awww,¡± Jenny sat down next to Betty and wrapped an arm around her. ¡°I understand the words you say but never what you mean. But I know you''re not feeling good.¡±


    ¡°Let''s go inside,¡± Kyle suggested, opening the door to the antique shop. His grandfather looked up when they walked in and raised an eyebrow, but Kyle didn''t have time for the dirty old man right now. They headed upstairs and collapsed on the couch together, Betty in the middle between Kyle and Jenny, Moonlight curled up in her lap.


    ¡°I would rather not discuss my misfortunes,¡± Betty said. ¡°I would rather just sit here and watch anime.¡±


    ¡°Sure thing,¡± Kyle said. He''d never seen her this miserable in her entire life. ¡°Got a preference¡±


    ¡°Forgotten Garden,¡± Betty said. ¡°I would prefer to not think very hard. And I have not yet seen any of the new season.¡±


    ¡°Good choice,¡± Jenny nodded. ¡°I''ll make nuggets.¡±


    ¡°Chicken nuggets do not solve all of life''s problems,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°They solve most of them!¡±


    ¡°You can''t fill the hole inside you with nuggets!¡±


    ¡°Watch me!¡±


    ¡°I believe I would like some chicken nuggets,¡± Betty said. ¡°Or something to eat, at least.¡±


    ¡°Mrow.¡±


    ¡°Moonlight would also enjoy nuggets.¡±


    ¡°Is that alright for cats?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°Row.¡±


    ¡°He says he is not exactly a cat.¡±


    The enjoyably pointless theme music of the new Forgotten Garden season started on the camera, scantily clad girls backflipping to give the camera brief panty shots before settling into a fighting formation and running towards an indistinct hulking shadow.


    ¡°Do we know who that is yet?¡± Betty asked. ¡°Or are they simply attacking a generic monster?¡±


    ¡°There''s someone lurking around in the shadows,¡± Kyle said. ¡°But I don''t know if that thing in the opening is anything important yet.¡±


    ¡°I do not understand people who skip the openings,¡± Betty shook her head.


    ¡°They don''t want to get spoiled,¡± Kyle shrugged. ¡°A lot of openings reveal things before the show does. I mean you can tell who''s an important character just by seeing who''s in the animation.¡±


    ¡°Yes but there is so much enjoyment to be had from that,¡± Betty said. ¡°It can be like a puzzle, working out what will happen in the season from the images they decide to reveal.¡±


    ¡°Hey I''m right there with you,¡± Kyle shrugged. ¡°I like trying to guess that the opening will look like for the anime when I read a manga sometimes, too.¡±


    ¡°I also enjoy that!¡± Betty said a slight smile tugging up at the corners of her mouth. They didn''t so much fall as collapse into a frown. It was only a small frown, but on Betty''s face it was like she was sobbing uncontrollably.


    ¡°I waited too long, didn''t I?¡± Betty said. ¡°You kept telling me.¡±


    Kyle didn''t know what to say to that, because it''s hard to comfort someone when they''re right.


    ¡°You are a very good friend Kyle,¡± Betty said. ¡°I believe you may be my best friend. But Moonlight is a part of my soul. That''s why he was able to convince me when you were not. Only when I had finally been convinced to overcome my reservations, it was already too late.¡±


    ¡°Look,¡± Kyle said. ¡°I didn''t expect Evan to ask someone else either.¡±


    ¡°That was a surprise,¡± Betty admitted. ¡°And not a kind one. To Evan. If I had seen his positive qualities, other women might as well. I suppose I was like everyone else. I saw the three of us as somewhat pathetic.¡±


    ¡°You''re not pathetic!¡± Jenny insisted, plopping down on the couch next to the two of them. ¡°You''re all amazing! We can put a curse on this Goldie girl if you want.¡±


    Betty considered that for longer than Kyle was comfortable with.


    ¡°Mrow!¡± Midnight slapped Betty in the back of the head.


    ¡°No,¡± Betty finally said, ignoring the slap. ¡°No I do not believe that would be productive.¡±


    ¡°Not even a little one?¡± Jenny suggested. ¡°Nothing too bad! Or how about a curse on Evan?¡±


    ¡°Jenny!¡± Kyle said. ¡°We don''t curse our enemies if we can avoid it in the twenty first century.¡±


    ¡°Okay okay,¡± Jenny said. ¡°But look, Betty, I know getting turned down sucks. But you''ve got friends, and anime, and chicken nuggets! That''s not too bad, right?¡±


    Betty cocked her head as if considering. Kyle was having a hard time figuring out what she was thinking again, which he considered a good sign.


    ¡°No,¡± Betty said. ¡°I am still upset, but the situation is quite satisfactory.¡±


    On the screen the main character had wound up on the floor underneath the queen of the dryads. She was not technically naked, wearing a long flowing robe, but since that robe was almost perfectly see through it hardly mattered. She was saying something about pollination and bringing new life to the forest.


    ¡°Aha,¡± betty said. ¡°Exactly what we were just discussing. I was certain from the title she would be a villain, but I suspect she will be joining Kei''s harem.¡±


    ¡°What?¡± Jenny blinked. ¡°Oh, right. I still can''t get used to the modern version of that word.¡±


    ¡°Yeah it basically just means polyamory these days,¡± Kyle waved a hand. ¡°Porny stuff like this. Ecchi anime.¡±


    ¡°What''s ecchi?¡± Jenny cocked her head curiously.


    ¡°You have been watching Hidden Garden, correct?¡± Betty adjusted her glasses. ¡°Hidden Garden is ecchi. Suggestive situations, sometimes even actual intercourse, but in a light and playful manner.¡±


    ¡°Ohhh like how Kei keeps winding up underneath the girls,¡± Jenny nodded. ¡°And walking in on them naked all the time, but they still never remember to lock the doors.¡±


    ¡°No one in an ecchi anime ever remembers to lock the doors,¡± Kyle laughed. ¡°Ever. It''s a basic rule.¡±


    ¡°Not that it normally matters since they wind up in compromising positions all the same,¡± Betty added.


    ¡°I''ve noticed,¡± Jenny giggled. On screen Kei had escaped the dryad queen, but was now running naked through the halls of her palace. The camera focused a lot less on him than it did on the cleavage of the implausibly well endowed dryads poking their heads out of their rooms to see what all the commotion was about.


    Kyle was never entirely certain how he ended up where he was next. He leaned forwards on the couch to pick something up off the table. He never remembered what he''d been looking for. And then Jenny always swore she hadn''t moved her foot on purpose, but her foot slid under the table all the same, pushing on Kyle''s ankle and throwing him off balance. His fall lasted only a second before his head landed on something warm and soft. It took a second for his brain to register the texture underneath his neck. A sweater.


    His head hand landed directly on Betty''s breasts. And they were, it turned out, much larger than they looked through the sweater she was always wearing. He had the inevitable male split second of confusion upon touching unexpected breasts, then the next inevitable split second where he wondered how long he could stay exactly where he was, and then another where he wondered if lesbians ever had these same problems.


    ¡°Oh sorry,¡± he said once his brain had gone through its ordinary checklist. ¡°Are you?¡±


    But he couldn''t get up, because suddenly Jenny was on top of him. She straddled his waist, hands on his chest probably not intended to hold him in place but doing a good job all the same, especially when parts of his brain had no intention of resisting, the traitorous bastards.


    ¡°So like this?¡± Jenny asked, a mischievous gleam in her eyes. ¡°This is ecchi?¡±


    Betty stop this! He thought desperately. I''m too jumbled up to say anything!


    ¡°This is certainly a similar kind of situation yes,¡± Betty said, shifting so Kyle''s head was more comfortable against her chest. ¡°Although I do not know how well I fit the part of an ecchi heroine.¡±


    What? No! Kyle groaned in his own head. He shouldn''t have expected help, when Betty got curious on a topic sense came a distant fifty third to all other considerations. She probably thought of this as an experiment.


    ¡°Normally of course,¡± Betty continued, ¡°you would be rolling your hips in a more suggestive manner.¡±


    ¡°What the hell is going on here?¡± Kyle managed to say out loud.


    ¡°Oh right,¡± Jenny said. ¡°You mean like thi--¡±


    NOPE! Kyle''s brain finally triggered into action. Nope nope nope. These pants are tight already and if she moves too much more I''m going to need new ones.


    Apparently his body finally remembered he had super strength, because he was able to easily lift Jenny off him and put her on the floor while he shifted back up into a situation.


    ¡°Sorry I was getting a...cramp,¡± he said, leaning back and casually placing a pillow across his crotch. Jenny gave him an annoyed look, but she got back up on the couch beside him. Kyle felt like the air in the room was getting a little tight after that, especially since the action on the screen wasn''t any less suggested than it had been a moment ago. Jenny didn''t seem like talking either, so they sat watching the show for a few minutes in tense silence. It was Betty who chose to speak first.


    ¡°By ¡°cramp¡± just now did you mean an erectio...¡±


    ¡°I meant cramp!!!¡±

 Chapter 17: Wish Me Harder, Master! (Part 2)

    They watched a few more episodes before Betty left, saying she felt much better. Kyle thought that was probably true. She was acting less like a normal person and more like her normal self. She promised to see them all in the morning and accepted Jenny''s enthusiastic hug. By then, it was late enough that Kyle could barely keep his eyes open.


    ¡°I''m going to bed,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°Great!¡± Jenny said. ¡°I''ll come along!¡±


    Oh no, Kyle thought.


    ¡°Jenny you have your own room,¡± Kyle pointed out.


    ¡°I like yours better!¡± Jenny said. ¡°Besides I was alone and cold in that lamp for such a long time, it feels better sleeping in bed with someone!¡±


    ¡°That''s manipulating,¡± Kyle said. ¡°That''s what that was, it was you manipulating. You''re trying to manipulate me.¡±


    ¡°A little bit,¡± Jenny admitted.


    ¡°Well stop it,¡± Kyle said. He''d had enough stress pressed up close to her today, he just wanted to go to bed and not think about what happened this afternoon.


    ¡°I want to talk about what happened this afternoon,¡± Jenny said, following him into the bedroom.


    ¡°I don''t,¡± Kyle said, pulling a bottle of juice out of his drawer. ¡°It was a stupid thing that happened because Betty''s great but she''s a ditz and we were watching an ecchi.¡±


    He sat on the edge of a bed and took a drink. This had turned into an incredible complicated afternoon. Jenny didn''t make it simply by leaning way, way over to rest her hands on his mattress, staring himself in the face and almost daring him to stare down her top.


    ¡°Why didn''t we have a threesome earlier?¡± Jenny demanded.


    Well there was only one reaction to that. Kyle could only hope he''d spit the drink out so hard it came down in little droplets and didn''t cause any stains.


    ¡°What the hell, Jenny?¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°I wanted to have sex with you!¡± Jenny pouted.


    ¡°You....what...I....¡±


    ¡°Well I did!¡±


    ¡°Betty was there,¡± Kyle pointed out.


    ¡°I want to have sex with Betty too!¡±


    ¡°Okay this conversation is getting rapidly out of control.¡±


    ¡°At least something is!¡± Jenny threw up her arms in frustration. ¡°I was literally on top of you! And Betty didn''t seem interested in moving, either! You were in a position men have dreamed about for...forever!¡±


    ¡°Betty probably just forgot to move,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Don''t get mad that''s a very real option with her.¡±


    ¡°Not the point!¡± Jenny tangled her fingers in her hair. ¡°Do you know how long I''ve been inside the lamp, Kyle? A long time! And that''s all I know, because no one can even figure out what year it was the last time I was here! There aren''t a lot of guys in the lamp, Kyle!¡±


    ¡°I didn''t even know you wanted...¡± Kyle voice faded off. ¡°I mean, you just come off as kind of oblivious.¡±


    ¡°I am,¡± Jenny said. ¡°I''ve always been like that. And there''s a lot I don''t know about the world right now, so I miss things and mix things up a lot. And say dirty things when I don''t mean to. But I know what I want. And I''m not so oblivious I don''t know what I''m doing when I crawl into a guy''s bed naked. The only one that oblivious around here is you!¡±


    ¡°Alright so you''re lonely after four thousand years,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Fine! This town is full of guys who''d give up anything to sleep with you!¡±


    ¡°But I don''t want to sleep with them,¡± Jenny said. ¡°I want to sleep with you.¡±


    ¡°And Betty?¡±


    ¡°She''s more of a bonus,¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°Jenny...¡±


    ¡°And you want to have sex with me too!¡± Jenny insisted. ¡°You with your cramp. So why won''t you Master?¡±


    Looking at her standing there, Kyle had to admit it was a damn good question. But he had good answers to it, too.


    ¡°Did you hear what you just called me?¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°Master?¡± Jenny sat down on the bed beside him, looking confused. ¡°Yes of course. You''re my Master.¡±


    ¡°And that''s the first problem,¡± Kyle said. ¡°I have power over you. If I wanted to, I could banish you back to the lamp. Couldn''t I? I mean I wouldn''t, but I could. We''re bound together that way, and from what everyone is saying we can''t change that. I''d be taking advantage of you. Way, way worse than the thing where I couldn''t stop grabbing you the first couple of days, and I still feel bad about that. And besides, listen, if you think you have to sleep with me to stay out of the lamp you don''t. I''ll sign a magical oath, or something, I don''t know but you don''t need to do this just so...¡±


    ¡°That isn''t it!¡± Jenny gasped, her eyes wide. ¡°Is that what you really think?¡±


    ¡°I think it makes more sense than anything else,¡± Kyle told her. ¡°I''m just not that guy, Jenny. Things like this don''t really happen to me. Nothing really does. If I see someone waving in the street they''re always waving to someone else, and I feel stupid responding. The only people who ever spend any time with me are Betty and Evan. Well at least they were. Girls don''t notice me, guys only notice me to discount me as a threat.


    ¡°And that''s who I am. And now here you are looking like...like you...and saying you want to sleep with me. So yes, it makes a lot more sense to me you''re scared of ending up back in the lamp again. And you''re not going, so you don''t have to anymore. You can stop.¡±


    ¡°But Mast-Kyle, it''s got nothing to do with that!¡± Jenny insisted. ¡°I promise! But do you know how many of my Masters wanted to have sex with me over the centuries? Most of them!¡±


    This tale has been pilfered from Royal Road. If found on Amazon, kindly file a report.


    ¡°And that was wrong,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°It was different back then,¡± Jenny said. ¡°It was more about...there was a lot more of a sale, to it. I''m trying to pull up the word from your memories when I cast the knowledge charm. Tran....actional? Transactional. That''s the word. It was something you could offer up in a deal. I know, I know, it''s not like that now. Or at least it''s not supposed to be.


    ¡°But I''m a magical creature, Kyle. If someone touches me and I don''t want them to I can deal with it. And I almost never wanted them to, because they were all creepy old men who licked their lips at me or these big arrogant conqueror types who assumed I wanted to climb in bed with them just because they were so perfect. Thousands of years, teaching guys like that to keep their hands to themselves.


    ¡°And then I get summoned again after all this time, and it''s different. My new master is sweet, and nice, and cute in an awkward kind of way. And he gropes my tits and he apologizes. Last time I was out of the lamp if a guy grabbed you everyone expected you to apologize for getting in his way. So I''ve finally got a Master who I want to have lusting over me and he won''t! Do you have any idea how frustrating that is?¡±


    ¡°I have an idea how low your standards must be by now,¡± Kyle said dryly.


    ¡°Master!¡± Jenny stamped her foot. ¡°I mean Kyle!¡± she corrected, ruining the effect by acting out the foot stomp again.


    ¡°Alright alright,¡± Kyle reached out and took her hand. ¡°I mean...I guess you have a point. I didn''t really think of things from your perspective. Or when I did, I got it all wrong. But Jenny I don''t know...¡±


    He shook his head.


    ¡°I can''t just do this, you know? Forget being a virgin, Jenny. I''ve never even kissed a girl before. Never even been on a date. And I''m not so manly I can step in and be the super stud hero, alright? You''re the one with all the experience here. It would be great to respond the way you want me to, Jenny. But I''ve lived the life I''ve lived so far, you know? It doesn''t change overnight. If anything like that happens between us...I''m gonna need to go a little slow.¡±


    Jenny sat in silence for a moment. Then she started giggling.


    ¡°I was just thinking what Evan would say if he heard you say that,¡± she laughed.


    ¡°Oh god!¡± Kyle laughed back. ¡°He''d kill me! I think he''d actually try to murder me!¡±


    Jenny fell over, lying in Kyle lap, and the two of them laughed together until it felt like the laughter had flowed out of them, and with it had gone the uncomfortable tension they''d felt a moment before.


    ¡°You''re right,¡± Jenny said, when they both had quieted down. ¡°I was pushing a little too hard. And I really wasn''t thinking how complicated this must be for you. But I just don''t want you to ignore me anymore.¡±


    ¡°So maybe we start small,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Little steps. Like...do you want to go to the dance? I don''t normally go to those things, but...it could be a place to start.¡±


    ¡°Yes!¡± Jenny said. ¡°I want to see it! And see what kind of music people dance too now! I saw some stuff on the internet thing but you said it wasn''t trustworthy.¡±


    ¡°So you''ll go?¡± Kyle couldn''t help but smile a little.


    ¡°Of course!¡± Jenny grabbed him and hugged him. ¡°I don''t know exactly how it is in this century, but I bet there''s not too many guys who''d start out getting offered a threesome and wind up being happy they asked a girl to dance.¡±


    ¡°I was never normal,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°Okay!¡± Jenny said. ¡°This means we''re officially together now.¡±


    ¡°I don''t think that''s how it works,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°I''m going to issue a proclamation,¡± Jenny said seriously.


    ¡°I think they just call that ¡°social media¡± these days,¡± Kyle laughed.


    ¡°But we''re fixing one thing first,¡± Jenny said.


    Kyle was about to ask what it was but before he could she slid into his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him into a kiss. Their lips met and hers parted, his responding in kind. It was a clich¨¦ to say she tasted like strawberries, but she really did taste sweet. Like spiced cherries, maybe. The world around Kyle seemed to slow down. Muscles he hadn''t even known were tense relaxed, and he found himself wrapped in a comforting warmth he hadn''t even really thought possible.


    They stayed like that for quite a while before Jenny finally broke the kiss. Kyle probably wouldn''t have been capable.


    ¡°There,¡± Jenny said. ¡°Now you''ve kissed a girl.¡±


    ¡°Yeah,¡± Kyle breathed.


    ¡°And I''m sleeping in here tonight again,¡± Jenny said, heading for the doorway. ¡°No arguments Master!¡±


    ¡°Why do you keep calling me Master if you''re never going to listen to me?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°Tradition!¡±


    Kyle woke up the next morning and slid out from under Jenny. He was getting used to that, although now he knew she wasn''t just oblivious to her nudity the feel of things was a little different. He put on some clothes and headed to the kitchen, where his grandfather was waiting.


    ¡°Let''s get one thing out of the way first,¡± the old man said. ¡°These floors are very thin. I heard everything last night.¡±


    ¡°Oh god of course you did,¡± Kyle groaned.


    ¡°Are you an idiot boy?¡± His grandfather demanded. ¡°Are you out of your ever loving mind?¡±


    ¡°How about you let me do me and stay the hell out of it?¡± Kyle grabbed serial out of a cabinet. ¡°Why were you even here to eavesdrop in the first place? You have a house.¡±


    ¡°Because now that I''ve given you time off to focus on learning magic somebody''s gotta handle the stocking,¡± the old man said gruffly. ¡°Besides, maybe I''ll find another genie in there. You never know.¡±


    ¡°I feel like any genie who saw you leering at them would hide right back down inside the lamp,¡± Kyle sighed.


    ¡°Well that''s not really what I wanted to talk to you about boy,¡± his grandfather shook his head. ¡°I just got word this morning. The trial''s in a couple of weeks.¡±


    Danny shook his head. A trial. For Danny O''Brien. It still felt surreal.


    ¡°You know I''d almost managed to forget about it?¡± Kyle asked. ¡°Even with people staring at me in the halls at school.¡±


    ¡°Bad news has a bad habit of cropping up at bad times,¡± the old man said sympathetically. ¡°Still, after the trial it''ll be all over.¡±


    ¡°I hope so,¡± Kyle said. ¡°I still don''t understand it.¡±


    ¡°Can''t always understand the world,¡± his grandfather laughed. ¡°I''d think a young man with a genie in his bed would know that as well as anyone.¡±


    ¡°You''ve got a point,¡± Kyle smiled.


    ¡°I''m surprised the Uzbedis haven''t gotten involved,¡± the old man said. ¡°Normally they''d be all over a trial after a magical duel. I guess it''s because the kid didn''t show any powers of his own.¡±


    ¡°That or Tanya''s family is keeping it quiet,¡± Kyle suggested.


    ¡°That''s a thought. Dammit I can''t keep this all straight.¡±


    ¡°Me either,¡± Kyle said. ¡°But you know what? To hell with it. I''m going to get myself together, have a good day, and once the trial is over never think about Danny O''Brien again for the rest of my life.¡±


    Danny was leaning back against the wall of his cell. He did that a lot these days, leaning back with his eyes closed. The guards liked that about him. It meant he was quiet.


    The old jail was just outside town. And it was a jail, not a prison. Danny hadn''t known there was a difference, but there was. A prison was where you got sent to get punished. A jail was where they locked you up until your trial. This was a jail, and everyone here was waiting for their trial, just like Danny.


    Danny wondered if Kyle would show up to the trial or not. He''d have to, right? As a witness or something. Or as the victim? Danny didn''t know how that worked. It didn''t matter though, because Danny had no intention of being at the trial. He''d spent most of the past few weeks sitting quietly in his cell not bothering anybody, but that didn''t mean he hadn''t been doing anything. He''d been thinking. And that could be pretty dangerous, especially when you had a demon in your head teaching you magic.


    Sure, it sounded crazy. But so was the fact that Danny could flick his fingers and light a fire. It was just a tiny little birthday candle flame at the tip of his finger, but it was really there. Other people could see it. One of the other inmates had asked him how he did it, and Danny had just laughed. The the guards had searched his cell the next day looking for ¡°contraband,¡± which Danny took to mean the lighter or whatever they thought he''d used to make the fire. He was a little more careful with the fire after that.


    Leaning back against the wall of his cell, with his eyes closed, Danny was practicing.


    That''s good, that''s good, the efreet whispered in his mind. You''re getting better at feeling it. Soon you''ll be able to handle a little bit more of my power. Then all you''ve got to do is bust out and get to me.


    ¡°And then I get the whole thing?¡± Danny asked quietly, barely moving his lips.


    And some of my mind, too. You won''t be the same person after this. Don''t say I didn''t warn you.


    ¡°Will I be stronger?¡±


    Yes.


    ¡°Will I still want to kill Kyle Anderman?¡±


    Hell yes.


    ¡°Then good enough. What''s the next lesson?¡±


    You''re gonna like this one. How to burn out of handcuffs.

 Chapter 18: Normal High School Senior Problems

    ¡°No!¡± the scream reverberated through the cafeteria. ¡°No no no! I don''t believe it!¡±


    Outbursts like that were a lot less common than usual, thanks to exams being officially upon them. The magic of exam week is always that feeling of survival, of the final boss. Survive through this five to seven tests and you can have a reprieve from all that stress and worry. But someone in the cafeteria was not in tune with the air of tense anticipation.


    ¡°What the heck is going on over there?¡± Kyle asked, turning around to see.


    ¡°Evan is sitting with his date for the dance,¡± Betty said, as if the thought didn''t bother her at all. ¡°They are playing chess.¡±


    ¡°I never thought of chess as that exciting,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°It is when you are losing to Evan,¡± Betty said.


    ¡°NO!¡± Goldie shouted, pounding the table. Evan was laughing.


    ¡°Yes I can see that,¡± Jenny nodded. ¡°That''s a very "losing to Evan¡± reaction.¡±


    Evan left Goldie to pack up the chess boards and came over to the table with them.


    ¡°How are you guys doing today?¡± Evan asked, a huge beaming smile on his face. ¡°I''m on a winning streak.¡±


    ¡°We could hear,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°It could have been a more harmonious lunch date,¡± Betty added.


    ¡°Ah heck Betty,¡± Evan said. ¡°I''m sorry, I''m not trying to...¡±


    ¡°It is perfectly alright,¡± Betty said. ¡°I will admit I was disappointed, but you are a close friend. I have no desire to stand in the way of your happiness in anyway.¡±


    ¡°Thanks,¡± Evan said sheepishly. A shadow fell over the table as Goldie arrived.


    ¡°You forgot your cell phone,¡± she snarled, holding out the offending object.


    ¡°Oh thanks!¡± Evan said. ¡°Looking forward to the dance?¡±


    ¡°Touch me and I cut your balls off,¡± Goldie snarled. ¡°I plan on getting out of it before then anyway.¡±


    ¡°What does she mean getting out of it?¡± Jenny asked.


    ¡°You''re the new girl,¡± Goldie said. ¡°Ragbah. What are you doing here? I heard you didn''t need to take exams.¡±


    ¡°Moral support!¡± Jenny said, raising her arms in the air like a cheerleader. Then she started pumping them like imaginary pompoms. ¡°I''m having trouble with this particular part of American culture but it goes like...gimme and E! Gimme an X! Gimmie---¡±


    ¡°....gimmie gimmie a man after midnight,¡± Kyle finished, cutting her off. ¡°Maybe the chess game was loud enough for the cafeteria during exams.¡±


    ¡°Oh yeah,¡± Jenny looked around at the frustrated stares coming from all directions. ¡°You''re right, I''m sorry.¡±


    ¡°Well anyway this jerk showed up out of nowhere,¡± Goldie waved at Evan with the edge of her chess boards. No, chess boards. She was carrying three of them. ¡°And when we started losing, he started making bets. Finally I decided I would take him down once and for all, and bet I''d go to the dance with him.¡±


    ¡°I see,¡± Betty adjusted her glasses. ¡°That does explain a great many factors.¡±


    ¡°I''ll win my way out of it though,¡± Goldie said. ¡°Eventually.¡±


    ¡°Excuse me but why do you have three boards?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°Because we were playing three games,¡± Evan said.


    ¡°It was part of the challenge,¡± Goldie said. ¡°He won all three, it was infuriating. I just wish he''d told us he was this talented years ago, our record wouldn''t just be good it would be spotless.¡±


    ¡°Yeah,¡± Kyle gave Evan a look. ¡°He''s got a lot of hidden talents.¡±


    ¡°Do you have to talk about me like I''m not here?¡± Evan said.


    ¡°I''m trying to visualize it into existence,¡± Goldie shot back. ¡°But actually I''m not going to be here, I have an exam. Good luck, everybody. Except Evan.¡±


    ¡°Hugs and kisses!¡± Evan called after her, chuckling until Kyle elbowed him in the side. ¡°Ow! What was that for?¡±


    ¡°You cheated!¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°I did not!¡± Evan insisted.


    ¡°It''s one thing to win a game,¡± Kyle said. ¡°That was bad enough. But you tricked someone into going out with you that way? How does mental enhancement even make you good at chess in the first place?¡±


    ¡°Chess is just like tic tac toe or rock paper scissors,¡± Evan said. ¡°Just really, REALLY complicated. It''s all about conflicting patterns. If you memorize all the known patterns, you can win most games. That''s how all the chess masters do it.¡±


    ¡°But you''re using an unfair advantage!¡± Kyle shook his head. ¡°This is exactly the reason Trevor isn''t accessing his node.¡±


    ¡°Well I didn''t know anything about nodes when I started out,¡± Evan said. ¡°But since then I''ve had time to think of it, and I came to the conclusion that all of that''s a load of horseshit.¡±


    ¡°Oh really? How do you figure?¡±


    ¡°Three reasons,¡± Evan said, holding up three fingers and putting them down one by one. ¡°First, chess isn''t martial arts. There''s no way I''m going to accidentally kill Goldie if I use too much brain.¡±


    ¡°Okay fair,¡± Kyle admitted. ¡°But you still...¡±


    ¡°Second,¡± Evan cut him off, ¡°I don''t think it is an unfair advantage. Goldie was born with the brains to head the chess club, a boatload of money, and looks like something out of a high schooler''s fantasy, I know because I''ve had a few billion of them. Is a magically photographic memory really that unfair an advantage in the face of all of that?¡±


    ¡°That''s like saying doping is okay because some cyclists are shorter than others,¡± Kyle huffed.


    ¡°And three,¡± Evan said, ¡°I will absolutely guarantee you the world''s top chess grandmasters are doing exactly the same thing.¡±


    ¡°What?¡± Kyle blinked. He hadn''t been expecting that one.


    ¡°No seriously,¡± Evan said. ¡°Prove I''m wrong. Better yet think about it for a second. We know magic exists now, we know enhancing yourself this way is possible. Do you think everyone shares Trevor''s hangups? Of course they don''t. If this power exists people are using it to improve their own lives.


    ¡°Oh, and we know you can use it and not realize you did. Betty and I both did that, after all. So I bet you if we gave that little node test to the world''s top scholars, athletes, politicians even maybe, it''d come up with at least one or two little ones. Minimum.¡±


    Stolen from Royal Road, this story should be reported if encountered on Amazon.


    ¡°Well....maybe.¡± Something about it still sounded wrong to Kyle, but he was having trouble figuring out why.


    ¡°Think about it,¡± Evan grinned, slapping him on the shoulder. ¡°Or are you gonna tell me you''re not using it to ace exams?¡±


    Kyle had no answer to that one. He''d recently tried to connect a mental node with Tanya''s help, only to discover he already had one...a huge node. A little discussion had revealed that was how he''d heightened his reflexes enough to dodge Danny so easily when they fought in the hall. It was tied more to his reflexes than Evan''s, but it had still made his memory and learning speed a lot faster. A LOT faster.


    ¡°Knew it!¡± Evan laughed. ¡°Alright I gotta go, see you guys later.¡±


    ¡°There''s just kind of been a lot going on lately,¡± Kyle said, once Evan had left.


    ¡°We know,¡± Jenny said, rubbing Kyle''s back.


    ¡°I have meant to ask this since this morning,¡± Betty said. ¡°Did something happen between you two last night?¡±


    ¡°No.¡±


    ¡°Yes.¡±


    Jenny and Kyle glared at each other.


    ¡°Maybe a little bit,¡± Kyle admitted.


    ¡°I see,¡± Betty adjusted her glasses. The gleam made them look pure white. ¡°Please give excruciating details beginning with the desire to make skin on skin contact.¡±


    ¡°What? No!¡± Kyle sputtered. ¡°Where did you even get that notebook from?¡±


    ¡°We are in a school,¡± Betty said. ¡°I have notebooks. Now, did the desire come upon you suddenly, in the heat of the moment, or was it a slow...¡±


    ¡°Put that away!¡± Kyle insisted. ¡°Seriously! I can''t handle this right now. I''m still annoyed at Evan.¡±


    ¡°That''s pretty common,¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°I can''t believe he tricked someone into going to the dance with him.¡±


    Betty and Jenny exchanged a look.


    ¡°He has no idea does he?¡± Jenny shook her head,


    ¡°A common failing of the male brain,¡± Betty said. ¡°I should be going as well, the exam period is starting soon. But before I go allow me to assure you Goldie is quite satisfied with the arrangement.¡±


    ¡°What?¡± Kyle whirled around between them. ¡°What? But all she did was complain and insult him!¡±


    ¡°She''s so happy to have someone who can match her in chess,¡± Jenny sighed. ¡°She''d never have accepted if he just asked her though.¡±


    ¡°And Evan figured that out?¡±


    ¡°Almost certainly not,¡± Betty shook her head. ¡°He was probably attempting to be perverted and got lucky. But the outcome is the same. And while I am, as I said, disappointed, I will endeavor to be happy for them.¡±


    She walked away then, Kyle unable to do anything but stare dumbfounded at Jenny''s nodding face.


    ¡°It''s true,¡± Jenny insisted.


    ¡°I don''t get women,¡± Kyle sighed.


    ¡°I figured that out when I got into bed with you na--¡±


    ¡°NOT at school!¡± Kyle said. ¡°Please I''m begging you.¡±


    ¡°Okay okay,¡± Jenny sighed. ¡°Why didn''t you let me tell Betty we''re together now?¡±


    ¡°Because she just got rejected,¡± Kyle pointed out. ¡°It felt wrong. I guess we have to tell her before the dance, don''t we? I mean she might ask to hang out that night assuming I''m not going...¡±


    ¡°Oh don''t worry about that,¡± Jenny said dismissively.


    ¡°What do you mean?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°Guys really don''t notice anything,¡± Jenny rolled her eyes. ¡°Betty didn''t notice either, but I''ll give her a pass because she was distracted by Evan. But I think Betty is going to be busy on the night of the dance.¡±


    Betty wasn''t sure when exactly she''d become attracted to Evan. It had happened slowly, so slowly she''d barely noticed. It wasn''t that she''d never been physically attracted to anyone before, not in the slightest. But this was more than finding the sight of someone pleasing, she''d discovered she wanted to spend more and more time with him. Maybe it had taken so long to notice because they spent so much time together already. But it was there.


    And she''d just assumed. She''d just assumed he would be there whenever she got around to asking him. She''d feared rejection, certainly, but it had never occurred to her he might find someone else. Evan hadn''t had a girlfriend in his entire life, and he chose now to become spontaneously popular with girls. She should have listened to Kyle and asked him long ago. But discussions like that didn''t come naturally to her. Telling Kyle had been difficult enough.


    She mulled all of this over as she packed up her bag, her exam finally over. Her last exam, actually, she had an AP class the others didn''t that took its exam earlier. She was officially free for the rest of the summer, until university classes started.


    ¡°Meow,¡± Moonlight said from within her bag.


    ¡°Please be quiet,¡± Betty said. ¡°You know I am not supposed to have you in school. We will be outside in a few minutes and I will let you out.¡±


    ¡°Mrow!¡± Moonlight insisted, pointing with a paw. Betty turned her head in that direction and saw Trevor standing sheepishly in the corner.


    ¡°Hi Betty,¡± he said. ¡°I was uh, I wanted to talk to you.¡±


    ¡°We speak quite frequently,¡± Betty asked, confused.


    ¡°Well this is different,¡± Trevor said. ¡°I just...dammit I''ve never had to ask before. Wow, that was a stupid thing to say, I sound like most arrogant prick in the entire world. Let me start again, okay?


    ¡°Hey, Betty, do you want to go to the dance with me?¡±


    Betty stared at him.


    ¡°My face is too naturally neutral to adequately express my surprise and confusion,¡± Betty said.


    ¡°Well I thought about it a while ago,¡± Trevor said. ¡°So I asked Kyle about you, about what your deal was, and he said you were into Evan, so I backed off. But now...too soon, right? It''s too soon.¡±


    Betty blinked a couple of times. She''d never considered Trevor as a romantic partner. That being said, they did get along. And he certainly was aesthetically pleasing.


    ¡°I cannot promise we will have sex,¡± Betty said. She then felt a spike of alarm when Trevor fell against the wall, clutching his chest. It took her a second to realize he was laughing. ¡°Are you alright?¡±


    ¡°I''m fine,¡± Trevor promised, between fits of the giggles. ¡°I''m fine. That was just such a you thing to say. I understand that, Betty. If you''d prefer to say we''re going as just friends that''s fine too. But I''d rather spend the night with you than any of the other twits around this school who keep throwing themselves at me. And if it turns into something else...I mean we''ll see, right?¡±


    ¡°Yes,¡± Betty said, a smile pulling at the corners of her lips. ¡°Yes. That sounds enjoyable.¡±


    ¡°Great!¡± Tyler said. ¡°I uh, I got one more test today. But we''ll talk later, alright?¡±


    ¡°Ahah I see,¡± Betty said. ¡°You chose this moment to ask me because you had a built in exit strategy to avoid any awkwardness.¡±


    ¡°Can''t fool you,¡± Trevor laughed, walking away down the hall. ¡°I''ll see you later Betty.¡±


    Betty watched him go, letting her eyes travel down to his ass. Yes, he certainly was aesthetically pleasing. She didn''t feel quite the same connection to him she did with Evan, but staying close to him for an evening would not be unenjoyable.


    ¡°Meow,¡± Moonlight said proudly, patting her on the head like she was the pet.


    ¡°Stop that,¡± Betty said absentmindedly. ¡°What should I do now, Moonlight? Traditionally, this when I should contact my closest female friends to discuss the developments. But I do not have any female friends...¡±


    Except wait.


    She did.


    She did have friends like that now.


    ¡°I knew it!¡± Jenny pumped her hands in the air. ¡°I knew he was interested in you!¡±


    ¡°I did not know it,¡± Betty said. The two of them were sitting together in front of the school, on a bench beside a brick wall around a maple tree. ¡°But I am somewhat pleased. It is not the same as with Evan. But it is not unpleasant.¡±


    ¡°I think you''d be happier with Trevor anyway,¡± Jenny said. ¡°I know you''ve known Evan forever, but...¡±


    ¡°He can be a little much to take,¡± Betty admitted. ¡°I suppose our attention must now go towards proper clothing.¡±


    ¡°Proper clothing?¡± Jenny asked. ¡°Oh right, people do dress up for dances and stuff. What''s the right clothing to wear to a dance?¡±


    ¡°I was hoping you would know,¡± Betty said. ¡°I am generally hopeless with appropriate social cues. I assume you''ve seen many more events like this than I have.¡±


    ¡°Like a couple of thousand years ago,¡± Jenny said. ¡°In Uzbedi. Modern America is a complete mystery.¡±


    ¡°Oh-ho!¡± a familiar voice rang out above them. ¡°Is that so?¡±


    They looked up to see Ammeline standing over them on the brick wall, hands on her hips and her trademark superior expression across her face. The light reflected off the bright white bag for her fencing sword slung across her back.


    ¡°And so my rival!¡± Ammeline declared. ¡°I have uncovered yet another of your weaknesses!¡±


    ¡°How did you get up there?¡± Jenny asked, cocking her head.


    ¡°That is not important!¡± Ammeline declared.


    ¡°The only logical answer,¡± Betty adjusted her glasses, ¡°is that she saw us sitting over here and circled around the back, where she scrabbled up the brick wall on the far side.¡±


    ¡°I said it isn''t important!¡± Ammeline insisted. ¡°Honestly, a dramatic entrance is its own reward, you''re not meant to question how it came about! How gauche.¡±


    ¡°Sorry,¡± Jenny said. ¡°I was just curious, is all.¡±


    ¡°If you must comment on it then praise me for my flair for the dramatic!¡± Ammeline struck a pose with one arm raised in the air.


    ¡°Absolutely no one who has ever met you denies you have that,¡± Betty confirmed.


    ¡°There you see?¡± Ammeline said. ¡°Good! It''s settled. Now stop creating problems, or I will deny you my help!¡±


    ¡°Your help?¡± Betty asked.


    ¡°I happened to overhear the two of you discussing your dates to the dance,¡± Ammeline said.


    ¡°Oh so you were behind the wall listening when you climbed--¡±


    ¡°And I overheard you lack proper attire!¡± Ammeline talked right over Betty. ¡°Now a lesser woman would allow you to suffer in your iniquity, and arrive at the dance in whatever sad rags you were able to cobble together in your ignorance of proper fashion and style. However Ammeline Trent is no such coward! Defeating a fencer with both arms tied behind her back is no true victory. When I arrive at the dance and dazzle all who attend, overshadowing you completely, no one will be able to say you were dressed one spec less glamorous than I!¡±


    ¡°You mean...¡± Jenny asked slowly, still trying to piece together the words. ¡°You''re going to help us shop for clothes?¡±


    ¡°Who better?¡± Ammeline insisted. ¡°Rejoice, for you ladies find yourselves under the tutelage of the Ammeline Trent, the most glamorous woman within a hundred thousand miles! By the time I''m done you''ll sparkle like diamonds....almost as bright as me! Ahahahahahahahaha....¡±


    Betty and Jenny shared a worried glance as Ammeline threw her head back in a maniacal cackle.

 Chapter 19: Shopping with Ammeline

    ¡°First things first: Proper transportation!¡± Ammeline pulled out her cell phone and pressed an icon. ¡°Jerwin? Car.¡±


    ¡°Wait!¡± Jenny said. ¡°What about Kyle?¡±


    ¡°Are you attached to him at the hip?¡± Ammeline said. ¡°Men should be left alone frequently, it reminds them what they''re missing.¡±


    ¡°Yeah but...¡± Jenny looked back and forth between Betty and Ammeline. ¡°It''s just strange, you know? Ever since I was sum..since I got to this country I don''t think I''ve left Kyle''s side.¡±


    ¡°All the more reason!¡± Ammeline said firmly. ¡°He''ll understand. And if he doesn''t, he isn''t worth your time.¡±


    ¡°Well...¡± Jenny pulled out her own phone and called Kyle. It went to voicemail, like she expected. Kyle was in an exam after all. ¡°Hey Kyle, listen me and Betty and Ammeline are gonna go buy some clothes for the dance. I feel kinda weird leaving you, but then I also figure that''s kinda the thing you were worried about where I''d defer to you too much and treat you like that M word like we were talking about so I''m just gonna go. Okay? So yeah I''ll see you.¡±


    By the time she was done with that the car had arrived. Jenny hadn''t even been in the modern world a full year yet, and she knew absolutely nothing about cars, but even she could see that the vehicle rolling into the school parking lot was meant to be something expensive. Long and sleek and black, not a limo but certainly impressive, with a strange twirling hood ornament. The windows were tinted black, but the driver''s window rolled down to reveal a hugely muscular blonde man wearing a jet black suit and mirrored sunglasses.


    ¡°Car, Miss Trent,¡± the man said, climbing out and opening the passenger door for them.


    ¡°Thank you Jerwin,¡± Almmeline said, sliding into the car. Jenny and Betty followed her. The seats were leather, the air perfectly cool. The inside wasn''t arranged front to back but rather like a limousine, two couches with seatbelts facing each other. Jenny found herself sitting next to Ammeline, with Betty facing them.


    ¡°Where to, Miss Trent?¡± Jerwin asked once he was back in the driver''s seat.


    ¡°Just to the mall today Jerwin, thank you,¡± Ammeline said.


    ¡°Very good miss.¡± Jerwin closed the privacy shield between the front and back sections of the cars, and they began to move off.


    ¡°I must admit,¡± Betty adjusted her glasses. ¡°I knew your family possessed great wealth, but I was not fully prepared for this car.¡±


    ¡°Is this how you come to school every day?¡± Jenny asked, running her hand up and down the seats.


    ¡°No,¡± Ammeline said, a little uncomfortably. ¡°No that would be a little much, don''t you think? Besides, as the captain of the fencing team I believe it''s better I should walk to school and practice with the others. It helps build team unity that way. But my parents do insist that Jerwin stay close, and I must admit it is very convenient for occasions like this.¡±


    ¡°Which would explain why I have never seen this car before,¡± Betty said. ¡°But I am surprised your personal wealth did not come up during your self imposed rivalry with Jenny.¡±


    ¡°I consider my personal wealth the least impressive thing about me,¡± Ammeline said dismissively. ¡°Anyway the trip to the mall will not be long. And once we arrive you can both benefit from my experience! I must admit, Betty, I have been curious what you''d look like made up.¡±


    ¡°I assume you mean dressed up and with makeup on,¡± Betty said. ¡°I can assure you that I exist.¡±


    ¡°Mrow!¡±


    ¡°Oh I completely forgot about your cat!¡± Ammeline said, staring down at Moonlight. ¡°What was his name?¡±


    ¡°Moonlight,¡± Betty said. ¡°I failed to consider him as well.¡±


    ¡°Row!!¡±


    ¡°Will this cause difficulty?¡± Betty asked. ¡°I have never attempted to bring a pet to the mall before.¡±


    ¡°Keep him in your bag and everything should be just fine,¡± Ammeline said


    ¡°I''ve got a question,¡± Jenny said, raising her hand.


    ¡°Yes, Miss Ragbah?¡± Ammeline said.


    ¡°What exactly is a mall?¡±


    ¡°Ahahahahaha!¡± Ammeline said. ¡°Another victory! Albeit a low scoring one, given the cultural gap. It is an indoor marketplace.¡±


    ¡°I have not spent a great deal of time there myself,¡± Betty said. ¡°Some say the prevalence of online marketplaces will eventually make malls completely obsolete, but others suggest the mall offers a unique experience of its own. Which is certainly true of the Allpines Mall, where I assume we are headed.¡±


    ¡°Correct!¡± Ammeline said. ¡°Or very nearly, because we are already here!¡±


    The car parked and they got out. The mall was...a revelation. In fact it was almost nostalgic.


    Very, very little had been similar to what Jenny knew when she''d last been outside the lamp. And that wasn''t all bad. In fact it was kind of nice. A lot of things were better. Some things were a lot better. But no matter how much better the world gets, you miss what things were like before the change, if only because that''s how you first learned to be in the world. The translation spell she''d cast had given her a vague sense of the word ¡°mall,¡± which Ammeline had helped focus, but it wasn''t until she was inside that she really understood.


    This was a bazaar.


    The glass walled building was three stories tall. The inside of the building was mostly open, built around a huge central space with balconies looking down from the upper floors, lit from within by the glass ceiling. And on the lower floor, clustered around a huge fountain dominating the center of the building, a scene that would not have been out of place in the Uzbedi of old, crowds of people chattering and yammering as they squeezed between merchants stalls. The style was different, but the feeling was the same.


    Jenny loved it.


    ¡°Excuse me!¡± a voice that reminded Jenny of the hosts of those game-shows she''d watched with Kyle cut into her thoughts. ¡°Is there anything I can help you find today?¡±


    Jenny turned to see...a golem.


    No wait, new word for them now. Robot. That was it, a robot. No magic involved. Besides, golems looked more human. Instead of legs the thing she was talking to had a thick rectangle with wheels underneath. It had a torso kind of like a human, but the arms were jointed sticks ending in soft edged clamps and the head a flat box with two cameras inside of it. The whole thing was covered in white plastic, and a square of lights glowed in dancing patterns as it talked.


    ¡°Robot?¡± Jenny asked.


    ¡°I''m a Series 3 Type 6 Mall Consumer Assistance Machine!¡± The robot said, sounding almost proud. ¡°Is there anything I can direct you to?¡±


    ¡°No thank you,¡± Ammeline said. ¡°We''re good.¡±


    ¡°Just remember I''m here to help!¡± The robot said. ¡°My sole purpose in existing is to guide customers to the store they''re looking for!¡±


    ¡°Then why do you have hands?¡± Betty asked.


    ¡°Sometimes I also hand out coupons and pamphlets!¡± the robot said. ¡°I''m sorry, there are no coupons or pamphlets available at this time.¡±


    ¡°We know where we are going,¡± Ammeline said, turning away from the robot.


    ¡°Thank you very much,¡± Betty said as Ammeline pulled them away.


    ¡°Was it necessary to thank the robot?¡± Jenny asked. ¡°It was my understanding they aren''t alive.¡±


    ¡°Yes but you can never know,¡± Betty said. ¡°Should it ever become sentient, a little basic kindness might help us avoid a Terminator situation in favor of a Short Circuit.¡±


    The narrative has been taken without authorization; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.


    ¡°This way!¡± Ammeline said, pushing through the crowded mall. ¡°There are twenty seven clothing stores in this place, but only three of them are worth mentioning! We''ll check all three!¡±


    ¡°Please do consider that our budgets will not be nearly the same as yours,¡± Betty pointed out, adjusting her glasses.


    ¡°We are heading straight to Bertram''s!¡± Ammeline corrected, leading them confidently through the crowded mall. Jenny got to experience her first escalator, confusing Ammeline by how excited she was. Jenny tried to tamp it down. Sometimes it was hard to tell what was common or obvious in the twenty first century. The robots, for example, seemed unique to this mall. Although she''d seen five of them since she they got to this modern bazaar so they couldn''t be that unusual. Escalators, on the other hand, seemed so common it was safer not to comment on them. And finally they made their way up two escalators, on the very top floor, they found Bertrams.


    This time Jenny paid attention to Betty and Ammeline''s reactions. Apparently an entire store full of nothing but racks upon racks upon racks of clothing wasn''t all that unusual in this time and place, but it looked amazing to Jenny. There were stores that sold only clothing in her time, as well, but they were only for the incredibly rich. And they didn''t just have it out there for you, if you wanted that you got the cheap stuff at a market stall, they tailored clothes specifically to you. This was...


    Better.


    ¡°Now let''s see,¡± Ammeline said. ¡°Do either of you know your color wheel?¡±


    ¡°My what?¡± Jenny blinked. ¡°I understood all those words, but not the way you put them together.¡±


    ¡°She is asking whether or not we know what color clothes suit us best,¡± Betty explained. ¡°And I believe my color wheel to be mostly composed of grays.¡±


    ¡°I don''t know,¡± Jenny shook her head. ¡°I don''t usually wear a lot of clothes. Having to wear a top all the time since I got here...it''s been an adjustment.


    ¡°How European,¡± Ammeline said. ¡°Or Uzbedi, I suppose. Still I think it''s for the best you keep covered up while you''re here, at least for now.¡±


    ¡°All I know is that it makes my nipples itch,¡± Jenny complained. There was a strangled cry from behind them and the turned to see a store employee passed out on the ground. He was frothing at the mouth, still clutching the shirts he had been stacking on a nearby table.


    ¡°What''s wrong with him?¡± Ammeline wondered.


    ¡°I believe openly discussing your nipples was more than he could handle,¡± Betty adjusted her glasses.


    ¡°Coward,¡± Ammeline said dismissively. ¡°Well how about it Jenny? I see you...purple. Pink and purple. For some reason those are the colors that come to mind when I look at you.¡±


    ¡°Oh really?¡± Jenny asked a little nervously. Ammeline had just done a fair job of describing her natural skin tone. ¡°I suppose we could...¡±


    ¡°Dammit!¡± someone snapped from behind a rack of dresses. ¡°What do you even wear for a date with a sentient tapeworm, anyway?¡±


    They peered around the rack to find Goldie glaring at the dresses like they''d insulted her personally. Or possibly beaten her at chess.


    ¡°Your name''s Goldie,¡± Jenny said. ¡°Right? You''re the one Evan asked to the dance.¡±


    ¡°You are?¡± Ammeline asked, mouth open.


    ¡°Tricked,¡± Goldie glared at them. ¡°I''m the one Evan tricked into going to the dance.¡±


    ¡°Oh that makes more sense,¡± Ammeline nodded.


    ¡°Technically he did not trick you,¡± Betty adjusted her glasses. ¡°He bet you he could beat you at chess, and you accepted. A bet is not technically a trick. Especially since you had lost to him several times by that point. He did not shark you in any way I can confirm.¡±


    ¡°Was Evan always that good at chess?¡± Ammeline frowned.


    ¡°He''s been practicing a lot lately!¡± Jenny said with a huge, bright smile.


    ¡°Well whatever he did,¡± Goldie snarled, ¡°he is not going to be able to say I went back on a bet.¡±


    ¡°But Goldie why are you here?¡± Ammeline asked. ¡°You''ve got plenty of nice clothes. I''ve seen you wear them.¡±


    ¡°Nice isn''t good enough!¡± Goldie snapped. ¡°I need to make the little shithead''s eyes bleed and roll out of his skill. I want to look so good it causes him physical pain. I want to sparkle until the bastard goes blind.¡±


    ¡°Ahahahahahahaha!¡± Ammeline said. ¡°I understand perfectly! You don''t just seek beauty. You seek revenge.¡±


    ¡°Yes!¡± Goldie clapped her hands. ¡°Exactly!¡±


    ¡°I think we can pull off something like that!¡± Ammeline said. ¡°Especially under my tutelage! Come, my apprentices!¡±


    ¡°When did I become your...¡±


    ¡°Come along!¡± Ammeline cut Goldie off.


    Danny was asleep in his cell when the efreet shouted him awake.


    Hey! Hey get up you useless idiot!


    ¡°I''m not useless,¡± Danny mumbled, sitting up in bed. ¡°What do you want?¡±


    I can''t watch everything, but I''ve been doing what I can to keep track of the magic going on in town. I think we might have an opportunity. But I need some of your power to do it


    ¡°I thought you said I wasn''t strong enough to do anything long distance?¡± Danny asked suspiciously. ¡°At least not without your help.¡±


    Neither of us are. But this is different. This is more like...poking something awake. It''s a chance to take out the genie girl and the chick with the glasses, but if you''re not interested...


    ¡°Nah nah I''m interested,¡± Danny stood up and stretched. ¡°What do we gotta do?¡±


    The efreet told him. And with their powers combined, cast across time and space, something stirred within the depths of the mall''s foundations.


    Something old. And...hungry.


    Let''s go with hungry.


    The afternoon was a revelation of Jenny. Never, in all her centuries of living, had she been able to experience the simple joy of trying on clothes.


    She''d never thought much about clothes. They were itchy things that covered up her skin and locked her breasts in place, when really she preferred to have them flying free. She''d always figured they were a human thing. But now...


    Now she had so many choices.


    She''d never really had choices. Either she was stuck in the lamp, or her Master was making all the choices for her. Now she could...she could wear a pink and orange sweater, if she wanted to. She didn''t, it was hideous, but she could. It was entirely up to her. She''d never had so many options before. And she''d never gone anywhere with friends before, either. People were all so different from each other. Her Masters had been very much the same.


    Well, except for Kyle. When he called back she''d been sure he was going to order her to return home, but he just told her to have fun. Said he was glad she was having fun. Glad. None of her other masters would have said that, ever.


    And the dresses themselves. Jenny still felt better with the girls loose in the wind, but she had to admit she looked nice And the others looked so pretty, too! The afternoon passed too fast, in a swirl of sparkles and fabric, until finally the only one of them who hadn''t chosen a dress was Goldie.


    ¡°Stay back!¡± Goldie said from inside the changing room stall. ¡°Stay away! I don''t trust you with that camera.¡±


    ¡°Do you mean to imply I would attempt to take candid photos of your body while changing?¡± Betty asked. She was indeed holding a camera. The plan was for her to take pictures of everyone as they tried on outfits so they could see how they looked, but she''d been unfortunately interested in every step of the process.


    ¡°Yes!¡± Goldie said.


    ¡°That is ridiculous,¡± Betty said. ¡°I would ask for permission before I used such photographs for anything.¡±


    ¡°There!¡± Goldie said. ¡°Right there! You didn''t say you wouldn''t take them!¡±


    ¡°Maybe you should stand back a little,¡± Ammeline said.


    ¡°I would be upset about this if I had not proven myself entirely untrustworthy,¡± Betty adjusted her glasses. ¡°I also do not fully understand what the difference is between my seeing her undressed while we are all changing and my taking pictures of the same for reference.¡±


    ¡°Hey Betty?¡± Jenny asked. ¡°I''ve been meaning to ask. Ask again I mean, because something always seems to keep you from answering the question. What''s this big project you''re working on?¡±


    ¡°Oh I would be more than happy to discuss that,¡± Betty adjusted her glasses. ¡°You see...¡±


    ¡°Row!¡± a paw snaked out of Betty''s bag and slapped her in the back of the head.


    ¡°Moonlight seems to believe that should remain a secret.¡±


    ¡°Know what your problem is?¡± Goldie said. ¡°You''ve been hanging out with Evan too long. That would warp anybody''s eeeek!¡±


    Ammeline moved first, thought they all had the same impulse. Ammeline ripped open the curtain of the changing stall to find Goldie sitting on the ground in her underwear, pointing at the mirror.


    ¡°There was....¡± Goldie shook her head. ¡°There was a face. Some old guy.¡±


    ¡°A peeping tom?¡± Ammeline asked, looking around. ¡°Betty, put the camera down. One''s enough, don''t you think?¡±


    ¡°I was merely looking through the lens to see if it''s increased focus revealed anything,¡± Betty said. ¡°Goldie has made her position on candid photographs quite clear.¡±


    ¡°I don''t see how anyone could have been peering in here,¡± Ammeline said, looking around.


    ¡°Didn''t people say this mall is haunted?¡± Jenny said. ¡°Maybe it was a ghost!¡±


    Ammeline and Goldie whirled on her, in almost perfect unison.


    ¡°Don''t say that!¡± Goldie snapped.


    ¡°Really,¡± Ammeline said. ¡°I don''t believe suggestions like that are constructive. There''s no such thing as ghosts.¡±


    Jenny and Betty exchanged a look, and then looked back in the direction of the other two girls. Not directly at them, but in their general direction.


    ¡°Don''t do that!¡± Goldie snapped. ¡°I can see what you''re doing, you''re looking behind us to freak us out and make us turn around!¡±


    Another glance shared between Jenny and Betty.


    ¡°Yes!¡± Jenny said, a little too brightly. ¡°Yes that''s exactly what we''re doing!¡±


    ¡°You have certainly caught us,¡± Betty adjusted her glasses. ¡°Of course what would really show us is if you didn''t turn around and just walked towards us slowly, without making any sudden moves.¡±


    ¡°What are you babbling on about?¡± Ammeline said, turning around. ¡°See? There''s nothing there!¡±


    A third look between Betty and Jenny. There had been something there, a second ago. The figure of an old man in dirty rags with a wrinkled, leering face. But it had disappeared as soon as they''d turned around, which was typical. Every ghost Jenny had ever known was...what was the modern term? A jerk. Ghosts were jerks. Unless they were dangerous.


    ¡°I''m telling security you saw someone,¡± Ammeline said.


    ¡°You don''t think I was imagining it?¡± Goldie asked. ¡°I almost do, by this point. Where could it have come from?¡±


    ¡°I certainly don''t!¡± Ammeline declared. ¡°Besides even if you were, isn''t it better the store be alerted? Just in case? I''ll be right back. Goldie, you ought to get dressed.¡±


    ¡°Yeah,¡± Goldie nodded, turning back to her clothes as Ammeline left the room. ¡°Yeah I should. Or....or...¡±


    She turned around with a leering grin on her face.


    ¡°Maybe I should take more off,¡± she cackled. ¡°Yeah, strip naked and run through the halls! Sounds fun right?¡±


    ¡°What are you talking about?¡± Jenny asked, blinking in confusion.


    ¡°I''m talking about a great big orgy!¡± Goldie said. ¡°The whole mall can get in on it!¡±


    ¡°That is not a suggestion I would expect from Goldie,¡± Betty adjusted her glasses. ¡°Though admittedly--¡±


    ¡°I think she''s been possessed,¡± Jenny hissed.


    ¡°Ah, yes. That makes a great deal more sense.¡±


    ¡°Got it in one!¡± The ghost in Goldie''s body laughed. ¡°I''ve finally got a body to test drive again! What do you say girls? Let''s get naked and make out!¡±

 Chapter 20: Contraband

    ¡°I don''t think Goldie would appreciate that,¡± Jenny said, staring at the ghost in Jenny''s body who had just proposed lewd acts with his borrowed assets.


    ¡°Ah screw her,¡± the ghost said. ¡°No seriously I''m asking you to. Come on, I haven''t had this much energy in decades. Mostly all I can do is peek now and again, flip up a skirt on the way out. But now I can have some real fun. And this body is so young and strong!¡±


    The ghost used Goldie''s body to backflip against the changing room wall and up onto the curtain rod between compartments.


    ¡°Ooh! And flexible.¡±


    Betty took a picture.


    ¡°Betty!¡± Jenny snapped. ¡°She''s still only wearing her underwear!¡±


    ¡°I am not taking lewd pictures,¡± Betty insisted. ¡°I am cataloging the paranormal.¡±


    ¡°Lewd pictures of the paranormal are still lewd pictures!¡±


    ¡°No no no!¡± The ghost laughed. ¡°Take all the lewd pictures you want! Here, let me make it good for ya!¡±


    He ripped off Goldie''s bra and tossed it aside, hanging over them in a crouch. Betty raised her camera again but Jenny blocked it.


    ¡°Get out of her body right now!¡± Jenny insisted.


    ¡°Don''t wanna!¡± The ghost laughed. ¡°Do you have any idea how long it''s been since I had the energy to cause trouble? My original plan was to possess all four of you. Even back when I was alive I could handle four or five girls, easy.¡±


    The ghost wagged Goldie''s eyebrows lewdly.


    ¡°Tell me more,¡± Betty asked


    ¡°No!¡± Jenny snapped. ¡°Get out of her this instant! We know a really powerful sorceress!¡±


    ¡°I believe you,¡± the ghost said. ¡°Some of you got some real serious magical energy, that''s why I couldn''t do the four way possession thing. Are you all even human? But this girl didn''t have much to speak of, so now I''m in here I''m gonna have some fun!¡±


    ¡°I do not believe that to be the case,¡± Betty cocked her head.


    ¡°And are you two gonna stop me?¡± The ghost laughed. ¡°You said you knew a sorceress, so you don''t know how to get me out of here yourselves. By the time she gets here I''ll be long gone. And if you try to restrain me you might hurt your friend.¡±


    ¡°Not us,¡± Betty said. ¡°Moonlight says he is done with your nonsense.¡±


    ¡°Moonlight?¡± Goldie''s face looked confused. ¡°Is this some hippy thing?¡±


    ¡°Mrow!¡± Moonlight said, popping out of Betty''s bag. Goldie''s face went white as a sheet.


    ¡°W-what the hell is that thing?¡± The ghost demanded nervously.


    ¡°It''s a five elements cat,¡± Jenny said. ¡°Right? That''s what Tanya called it.¡±


    ¡°That is correct,¡± Betty said, adjusting her glasses. ¡°Interesting. I assume such creatures are antithetical to the undead? Something to keep in mind.¡±


    ¡°Hey look!¡± the ghost said, sweating through Goldie''s pores and plastering a huge, terrified smile across it''s face. ¡°Look, see? I''m being good! No reason to do anything crazy.¡±


    ¡°Row.¡±


    ¡°He says he wants to eat you,¡± Betty said. ¡°Also interesting. Can he actually eat ghosts? I don''t know enough about him to tell you.¡±


    ¡°Hey hey hey!¡± The ghost waved Goldie''s hands desperately. ¡°Look I''m giving the body back, I''m giving the body back right....now!¡±


    Goldie slumped down heavily on the changing room bench while the ghost floated out, a transparent figure of a dirty old man. They only saw him for a brief second as the ghost fled through the back wall of the changing room.


    ¡°What happened?¡± Goldie said.


    ¡°You said you were feeling dizzy and sat down,¡± Betty said. ¡°Nothing else of significance occurred.¡±


    ¡°Yeah sorry,¡± Goldie mumbled. ¡°I''m just feeling a little tired I guess. Where''s my bra?¡±


    ¡°You took it off,¡± Jenny said. ¡°I didn''t see where it landed. You''d better get dressed.¡±


    Goldie had just finished pulling on clothes when Ammeline arrived a female security guard in tow.


    ¡°Honestly,¡± Ammeline said. ¡°I told them about a peeping old man and they started acting like absolute children.¡± Does everyone in this hotel believe in ghosts?


    ¡°I never said I believed in ghosts!¡± the security guard said. ¡°I never said that! Not out loud! I just wanted to get the robot first!¡±


    And she was indeed followed into the changing room by a robot. This one was painted blue, with yellow stripes down the side, but otherwise looked basically identical to the one which had greeted them on their way into the changing room.


    ¡°And how exactly is the robot going to look for peepers?¡± Ammeline insisted, with her arms crossed. ¡°Those things are a publicity stunt!¡±


    ¡°Don''t mock Rodney!¡± The security guard said. ¡°He''s more useful than you''d think.¡±


    ¡°I have over eight hundred security related functions!¡± The robot said. ¡°These include following purse snatchers, facial recognition, identifying pickpockets, identifying contraband, directing customers to the restrooms...¡±


    ¡°Yes yes yes I''m sure it can do amazing things,¡± Ammeline said. ¡°But my friend was peeped on. What is it going to do about that?¡±


    ¡°Ammeline,¡± Goldie said, ¡°it''s alright. Maybe I just imagined it. And whoever it is they''re gone now.¡±


    ¡°Yeah!¡± Jenny said brightly. ¡°Maybe we should just buy our dresses and forget this every happened. We were pretty much done shopping anyway, right? Goldie you said you liked this one.¡±


    ¡°It matched well with your hair,¡± Betty reminded her.


    ¡°Yeah I''m pretty sure I''m gonna get that one,¡± Goldie confirmed. ¡°Let''s just get our clothes and go.¡±


    ¡°Contraband detected!¡± The robot said. While they''d been talking it had wandered over to the next stall. It turned around, holding up a plain white bra.


    ¡°Hey that''s mine!¡± Goldie said. ¡°I wondered where that went! See it''s got my name on it...¡±


    ¡°Securing contraband,¡± the robot said, and to Jenny''s surprise the front of its torso opened up to reveal a large empty space into which it dropped the bra. ¡°Contraband secured.¡±


    ¡°Rodney no,¡± the security guard said. ¡°Override. Give this lady back her bra.¡±


    ¡°Bra,¡± Rodney said. ¡°Contraband. Contraband detected. Securing contraband.¡±


    The robot''s arm swooped upward, catching Ammeline''s blouse at the bottom and tearing up. Her blouse flew open, and the robot came up carrying her braw.


    ¡°WHAT do you think you''re doing?¡± Ammeline demanded, wrapping her arms around her chest. Funny, Jenny would have expected a girlish scream...but then again that wasn''t exactly Ammeline''s style.


    ¡°Contraband secured,¡± the robot said, dropping the bra into it''s compartment.


    ¡°This is precisely what I warned about at the entrance,¡± Betty adjusted her glasses. ¡°The uprising has begun.¡±


    ¡°Rodney stop it!¡± the security guard said. ¡°Override! Shut down!¡±


    ¡°Contraband detected.¡±


    ¡°Emergency shutdown code 417eeeeeeeek!¡±


    The security guard fell to her knees clutching her chest as the robot came up holding her bra, leaving her uniform top in tatters. It tucked the bra away in its compartment and started whirling around the room.


    ¡°Crime is rampant in this area!¡± the robot declared. ¡°Detecting massive melon smuggling operation. Initiating crackdown procedures. Will pound the problem hard and fast. Massive cleavage of criminal activities. Full frontal for all perpetrators. Sex joke!¡±


    The narrative has been taken without permission. Report any sightings.


    ¡°What the hell is going on with this thing?¡± Goldie demanded.


    ¡°Hey I got an idea,¡± the robot said. ¡°Wanna get naked and make out?¡±


    ¡°It''s-!¡± but Jenny stopped herself. Were they still keeping it a secret under these conditions? How serious was this problem? And they definitely had a problem, because Jenny was pretty sure the ghost had just possessed the robot.


    ¡°Contraband detected,¡± the robot said, moving towards Betty.


    ¡°Cover your chest!¡± Jenny warned. But the robot....the ghost...Rodney had tricked them all. It wasn''t going for Betty''s bra, it was going for her backpack.


    It looped the pack off her bag before anyone had a chance to react and shoved it immediately in the compartment, which slammed shut with grim finality.


    ¡°Super scary magical cat secured,¡± Rodney said. ¡°Oh and hey look!¡±


    It swiped it''s claw forward, tearing Betty''s sweater and coming up with her bra. Betty hardly moved.


    ¡°My cat,¡± Betty said distantly. Then something sharpened in her eyes, as if her brain had caught up to the rest of the world. ¡°Give me back Moonlight!¡±


    ¡°Under absolutely no circumstances!¡± the robot said. ¡°And I''m out. There''s a whole mall full of luscious young kkkkkkkkkrrkkkkkk!!!!¡±


    Ammeline had kicked the robot in the face, the tattered remains of her blouse now tied in front of her to give her some modesty.


    ¡°Looked at in a certain light this was either horrific or amusing,¡± Ammeline said. ¡°But it lost all chance of being comedic when you harmed a cat! Return it immediately or...oh, I''m threatening a machine.¡±


    ¡°What a violent woman!¡± Rodney complained, rolling backward on his wheels. ¡°That''s cool, that''s cool, some guys are into that. Not me, but people with lower standards.¡±


    ¡°I-I don''t understand,¡± the security guard said from the floor. ¡°It can''t move that fast! The arms are just for show!¡±


    ¡°Well obviously this one is broken,¡± Goldie said. ¡°And it''s kidnapped a cat.¡±


    ¡°Give him back!¡± Betty insisted, lunging for the robot. Rodney cackled and spun out of her grip, racing away through the store and out into the mall. Ammeline chased after it, Betty and Goldie right behind her, and Jenny chased after everyone else.


    ¡°We could be in trouble,¡± Goldie said. ¡°There''s dozens of security robots in this mall. If it stops acting haywire and blends in finding it could be a real problem.¡±


    There was a ripping noise and a scream from the direction of the food court.


    ¡°I do not believe that will be a problem,¡± Betty said.


    ¡°Of course not,¡± Ammeline said. ¡°It''s a broken machine, it can''t make plans.¡±


    ¡°It''s not very good at it anyway,¡± Jenny said grimly. Ghosts were always jerks, but this one was especially irritating.


    ¡°Betty,¡± Goldie said. ¡°You should, uh...¡±


    ¡°I should what?¡± Betty blinked, then looked down at her bare chest. ¡°Oh yes. I shall tie it like Ammeline has done. But we should really press our pursuit.¡±


    The followed the trail of screams, ripped blouses, and shouts of the word ¡°contraband!¡± until they caught up with the robot.


    ¡°Are you still coming?¡± Rodney the possessed robot complained. ¡°It''s just a couple of bras!¡±


    ¡°You have my cat,¡± Betty reminded him.


    ¡°That thing''s not exactly a cat,¡± the robot said, disappearing into the crowd just as they passed a bridge between the two third-floor balconies. Hard as they tried to look, none of them could figure out which way he went.


    ¡°Split up!¡± Ammeline suggested. ¡°Try to cut it off before it can reach the next balcony!¡±


    Jenny moved to go with Ammeline, but Betty touched her on the arm. Jenny turned to follow her, while Goldie went with Ammeline.


    ¡°Ammeline''s desire to assist me is gratifying,¡± Betty said, ¡°but neither she nor Goldie are informed as to our opponent''s true nature. The two of us should be the ones to corner the robot.¡±


    ¡°And what if Goldie and Ammeline catch up to it without one of us there?¡±


    ¡°They won''t,¡± Betty said. ¡°We''re closer. Moonlight is my familiar, I can tell.¡±


    Betty led them through the crowd until they reached the escalators.


    ¡°We didn''t think of that!¡± Jenny said worriedly. ¡°There''s ways up and down here too, cutting it off on the bridge won''t work!¡±


    ¡°We''ll just have to follow it,¡± Betty said. ¡°I wonder why it chose this direction?¡±


    The crowd had thinned considerably, to the point where there were one or two people at most. The stores here were either less popular¡ªspecialty appliances, things like that¡ªor not open at all. They made their way down the escalator and in the direction Betty indicated, finally finding the robot waiting for them in front of a store marked ¡°Garden Supply.¡±


    ¡°And so the time has come for our final battle,¡± Rodney said. ¡°As is gladatorial tradition, we will fight naked.¡±


    ¡°I don''t think we''re supposed to do that,¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°Come on!¡± the robot whined. ¡°I''m not wearing any clothes!¡±


    ¡°Very well,¡± Betty said, reaching to pull off her sweater.


    ¡°Betty stop it!¡±


    ¡°Look ladies here''s the real deal,¡± the robot said. ¡°I don''t think either of you can take me while I''m in this mechanical body. Not with the way I''m powering it up. So how about you turn around and forget all about...¡±


    ¡°Ahahahahahahahahaha!¡± came a distant laugh, everyone''s attention turning to the third floor balcony on the other side of the mall. Ammeline stood with one point on the railing, pointing an accusing finger in the direction of Rodney. ¡°I''ve found you, you mechanical malefactor! Malicious machine! Robotic reprobate!¡±


    ¡°You have to admire her vocabulary and command of alliteration,¡± Betty said appreciatively.


    ¡°She can''t get over here in time to stop me from...¡±


    Ammeline disappeared from the railing. Then she reappeared, coming at a run.


    And then she jumped.


    The leap carried her across the gap between balconies, soaring over the astonished heads of the customers below. She caught the bottom of the balcony on the far side, swinging on it like a high bar in gymnastics to turn her forward momentum into a two-footed kick that slammed into the robot''s chest and sent it flying backwards into the window of the garden supply store, crashing through the glass. Without thinking, Jenny and Betty followed it in. The found it crumpled on the ground next to a pile of knocked over shelves.


    There was a loud slamming noise behind them, and they turned to discover heavy metal security gates had lowered over the doors and windows, locking them inside.


    ¡°Wow,¡± Rodney said, picking himself up and wobbling until he got straight on his wheels. ¡°Did not expect that crazy bitch to try jumping the gap. But I got you both in here, so it''s all good.¡±


    ¡°This store is closed,¡± Betty said, looking around. There was almost no stock, and no employees. ¡°This was a trap.¡±


    ¡°Yep!¡± Rodney said, grabbing a garden hoe off a display against the back wall. ¡°Now it''s just you and me in this powered up robot body and I''m the one with a weapon!¡±


    ¡°Incorrect,¡± Betty said, adjusting her glasses. ¡°You are significantly less armed than we are. I believe your next line is an attempt to make a pun about using a hoe to kill hoes.¡±


    ¡°I uhm...¡± Rodney stammered. ¡°N-no it wasn''t! Anyway, what weapon do you have on you exactly?¡±


    ¡°Moonlight,¡± Betty said. ¡°Tanya''s been training me for weeks. The spell is called Empower Familiar. And this time, I think he has ample reason to cooperate.¡±


    Betty held out her hand, a soft light emitting from her body.


    ¡°Yeah I''m not going to let you finish whatever the hell that is,¡± Rodney said, swinging in with the hoe. But his swing went wide as chaotic sparkles flashed around his eyes. ¡°Ah! What''s this? What is this?¡±


    ¡°About the best illusion I can do on my own right now,¡± Jenny said. ¡°But it''s enough!¡±


    ¡°There you are,¡± Betty said, her eyes flashing with blue-white power.


    ¡°MrrrOOWWWWW!¡± Moonlight snarled from within the robot''s chest. The was a sound of tearing metal and an enormous claw burst from the robot''s chest, tearing open a hole and ripping apart the whole front of the robot. The claw was only there for a second, and it was a normal size moonlight who hopped out and rubbed against Betty''s leg, erupting through the hole in a spray of stolen bras.


    ¡°Ouch dammit!¡± Rodney said, his ghostly form floating out of the ruined robot body. ¡°That actually hurt! What the hell is that thing?¡±


    ¡°My cat,¡± Betty said.


    ¡°Her familiar!¡± Jenny said cheerfully. ¡°She''s a sorceress in training.¡±


    ¡°Izzat so...¡± The ghost said, looking around nervously. ¡°Come on girls how about letting me go?I was just having a little fun. I''ve been dead for a hundred and twenty five years! That''s one heck of a dry spell, am I right?¡±


    Moonlight yawned. And then opened his mouth wider. Light began to glow from within the throat of the five elements cat, and the ghosts rags began to flutty like they were caught in a strong wind.


    ¡°Hey wait,¡± the ghost said. ¡°Hey!¡±


    Within a few seconds the ghosts was pulling desperately against a powerful wind drawing him towards Moonlight''s mouth. Trails of glowing energy streamed off of him, and he seemed to grow fainter by the second.


    ¡°Wait!¡± The ghost said. ¡°I''ll tell you about the guy who powered me up! I mean, I never met him but he''s got demon power! Demon! I recognized it ''cus saw one once when I was alive, it was called an ifeet or something! That''s valuable info right? Sorcerers look into that kind of thing? I could help you find him! I coullgbhendhtherneerhebertbeiunshhhhh....¡±


    When Moonlight finally closed his mouth the ghost had not only faded to be almost invisible, he had also lost his human shape. There was nothing left but a wisp of smoke with the vague suggestion of a human face. It mumbled something incoherent and floated away through the wall.


    A few moments after that, the security door lifted to reveal Goldie, Ammeline, and the security guard.


    ¡°You''re alright!¡± Goldie said. ¡°Thank god. You should have seen it, Ammeline was about to go at the gate with her fencing sword.¡±


    ¡°Ahahahahaha!¡± Ammeline said. ¡°Perhaps I got a little overenthusiastic. But of course they''re alright! My rival would never be taken down by something as simple as this!¡±


    ¡°Now hang on a minute,¡± the security guard said. ¡°You just jumped across the balcony! And destroyed the windows of this store! Do you have any idea how many...¡±


    ¡°Oh-ho!¡± Ammeline whirled, a predatory gleam in her eye. ¡°Are we discussing fault and blame here? I would be absolutely happy to do that!¡±


    ¡°It was amazing Kyle,¡± Jenny said over the phone. ¡°I think she must be a sorceress, I''ve never seen anything like it. We got our dresses for free, and the mall gave us each a voucher for one free meal a week at the food court for the next four years. It was incredible.¡±


    ¡°Ammeline''s always been like that,¡± Kyle said. ¡°I never knew her very well and I could tell you that. I''m more worried about how this ghost said he got his power from an efreet.¡±


    ¡°Yeah that''s a little scary,¡± Jenny admitted. ¡°I wish we could figure out where that guy is. But until we can find him...would it be okay if we all met up at your house to go to the dance? You live closest to the school and we all bought our dresses together and we were talking...¡±


    ¡°Sure,¡± Kyle said. ¡°I still have a little trouble believe I managed to ask you.¡±


    ¡°I have trouble believing what you turned down to do it,¡± Jenny giggled. ¡°But you can''t back out now! I''ll be back in a little while.¡±


    ¡°Hey listen,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Did you have fun?¡±


    ¡°Sure!¡± Jenny said happily. ¡°I made friends!¡±


    ¡°So that seems like a completely pointless waste of time,¡± Danny said in his jail cell, when the efreet gave him a quick rundown of what had happened.


    Nah it was just a little fun. Besides you never know what''s going to come in handy later.


    ¡°Whatever,¡± Danny sighed. ¡°If this is your idea of revenge, I picked the wrong partner.¡±


    No it''s my idea of a TEST. It''s exam season, didn''t you hear? All your friends at school are taking them you don''t wanna be left out.


    ¡°A test of what?¡± Danny snarled.


    Projecting my power that far? That took serious magical muscles. You''re finally strong enough to handle my full power. So give it a couple of days for you to memorize the spells...


    ¡°And I can get out of here,¡± Danny grinned. ¡°Fantastic. Hey, do you think I might be ready the night of the dance?¡±


    Sure. Why then in particular?


    ¡°Well I could say it''s because I know where most of my targets are gonna be,¡± Danny said. ¡°I could say it''s traditional. But the real reason is I just love it when I get a chance to steal the show.¡±


    Sure thing, sure thing. The efreet chuckled in Danny''s mind. Night of the dance it is. We''ll burn the whole place to the ground. It''ll be fun.


    ¡°And kill Kyle.¡±


    Yeah yeah. Don''t gotta worry about that. We''ll kill Kyle, that''s for damn sure.

 Chapter 21: Night of the Dance

    Kyle hadn''t worn a tie in years. The last time had been for a funeral.


    He was kicking himself for not thinking about clothes for the dance earlier. He''d shrugged and gone ¡°formal dance? Yeah I''ve got formal clothes.¡± He hadn''t even bothered to try them on to see if they still fit. They did, but barely. They were tighter across the chest and shoulders than they had been, and a little short in the legs. He''d been worried at first he was getting fat, but actually the problem was the opposite. Either because he''d been working out with Trevor every day, because of his physical enhancement magic, or both, he was getting taller and more muscular.


    It was a lot to think about. Jenny had been in his life for what, two months? Three, at the most? And so much had changed so fast. He wondered again what exactly he''d wished for that brought all this about. Or what of it was his wish and what of it was just a side effect.


    ¡°Weird feeling isn''t it?¡± his grandfather said, sitting down across from Kyle at the kitchen table. ¡°Waiting on a woman. There''s a whole song.¡±


    ¡°I''m not used to it,¡± Kyle admitted. ¡°I''m not used to the tie either. And there''s four of them up there.¡±


    ¡°Yeah but you''re only waiting on one of them,¡± his grandfather grinned. ¡°Unless you arranged something real special while I wasn''t looking! So are you taking them all to the dance, or...¡±


    ¡°Grandpa!¡± Kyle snapped. ¡°Stop it! Evan''s bad enough.¡±


    As if summoned by Kyle''s words, there was a knock at the door.


    ¡°And that''s probably him now,¡± Kyle said, using it as an excuse to escape the lecherous old man''s waggling eyebrows. When he opened the door it turned out to not only be Evan, but Trevor too, and someone else he''d never met before.


    ¡°Hey guys!¡± Kyle said. ¡°And uhm...¡±


    ¡°Conrad Halford,¡± the stranger said, extending a hand. ¡°I''m Ammeline''s date.¡±


    ¡°Oh right,¡± Kyle said, taking his hand. Conrad was only a little shorter than Trevor, and a lot more slender. Everything about him was...blonde. Blonde hair, blonde eyebrows, pale skin, bright blue eyes. He wore the suit like he''d been born in it. ¡°Nice to meet you.¡±


    ¡°He came and got us in a limo,¡± Evan said. ¡°A whole limo.¡±


    ¡°Ammeline insisted,¡± Conrad sighed. ¡°Honestly, she doesn''t mean to throw the money in everyone''s face. I just think sometimes she doesn''t realize she''s doing it.¡±


    ¡°Plenty of people have limos tonight,¡± Trevor pointed out.


    ¡°Not like that,¡± Evan said dryly. ¡°Can we come in yet?¡±


    ¡°Oh right!¡± Kyle said, stepping out of the way. ¡°Come on in!¡±


    The arrival of friends didn''t change as much as he thought it might change. Now they were all sitting around waiting for Jenny and the others....together. At least there was someone to talk to besides his grandfather. In fact once Kyle had other male company the old man made himself scarce.


    ¡°So how do you know Ammeline?¡± He asked Conrad. ¡°You don''t go to our school.¡±


    ¡°No I go to Walsham''s Priory,¡± Conrad said. ¡°But our families have known each other forever.¡±


    ¡°Arranged marriage kind of deal?¡± Evan said. ¡°Lucky bastard, not having to find your own women. It''s cheating.¡±


    ¡°You literally cheated at chess to get this date,¡± Trevor pointed out.


    ¡°Yeah see?¡± Evan said. ¡°You see what I was reduced to? And it wasn''t cheating.¡±


    ¡°Well for what it''s worth,¡± Conrad laughed, ¡°finding my own women isn''t something I ever thought about much. I''m just here because Ammeline''s parents said she needed a date to go to the dance, and she''s a friend.¡±


    Evan just shrugged and rested his head in his hands.


    ¡°Did the girls tell you how much longer they''re going to be?¡± Trevor asked.


    ¡°Well it was five more minutes an hour ago,¡± Kyle sighed.


    ¡°Don''t be ridiculous,¡± Conrad said. ¡°Ammeline''s involved. They''ve been ready for at least the past thirty minutes.¡±


    ¡°Then why are we still here and not going up to look?¡± Evan asked.


    ¡°You mean check, right?¡± Kyle said. ¡°Going up to check. Not go up and try to look at them while they''re changing.¡±


    ¡°I''m flexible,¡± Evan shrugged.


    ¡°They''ll be down in a minute,¡± Conrad said confidently. ¡°Ammeline thinks in terms of entrances.¡±


    ¡°Ahem!¡± Ammeline''s voice called from the top of the stairs. ¡°Ahem-hem! Ahem! If you gentlemen will all direct your eyes this way...¡±


    Ammaleine stood at the top of the stairs, wearing a shiny red and black dress that flowed down just below her knees. Her hair was still in its usual wide golden loops, but she''d tied them behind her in a curling ponytail. She walked down the stairs and stood at the bottom, gesturing back up to the top.


    ¡°See what I mean?¡± Conrad whispered.


    ¡°If I may present,¡± Ammeline continued, ¡°your dates for this evening.¡±


    Goldie came down first, her hair cascading behind her in a golden waterfall. Her dress was gold as well, made of some shimmering material that caught the light with every step, rainbows of color sliding across the golden sheen. She floated to the bottom of the stairs almost like an angel, walking right up to Evan with the click click click of high heeled shoes.


    ¡°Come on you jackass,¡± she told Evan. ¡°Let''s get this over with.¡±


    ¡°Would telling you you look beautiful tonight help?¡± Evan suggested.


    ¡°Not in the slightest.¡±


    ¡°Ahem!¡± Ammeline said, redirecting tension to the top of the stairs, where Betty had appeared.


    It took Kyle a moment to realize it was her.


    She didn''t actually look much different. All she''d done was pull her hair back, and put on glasses with thinner frames. And while the dress wasn''t what she usually wore it wasn''t a huge change from her normal colors, just...different. Her dress was silver, and it shimmered like Goldie''s but with a very different effect. Instead of a smooth surface Betty''s dress was covered in studs, so the light that struck the reflective fabric scattered until it looked like she was covered in stars, or maybe she''d become some kind of sparkling gemstone. In fact that was a good way to describe everything about Betty''s look for the evening. Just the same, but sparkling.


    ¡°Wow,¡± Trevor said. ¡°I knew she was gorgeous but...wow.¡±


    Betty walked downstairs and approached Trevor.


    ¡°Do you still find me aesthetically pleasing?¡± Betty asked.


    ¡°Are you ki---yes,¡± Trevor said, stifling a laugh.


    ¡°Good,¡± Betty said, adjusting her glasses. ¡°Should lust overcome you, please bear in mind this dress was on the expensive side, and I would prefer it not get irreparably torn.¡±


    ¡°I''ll try to control myself,¡± Trevor smiled.


    And then Jenny was at the top of the stairs, and Kyle almost lost the ability to talk.


    He had seen Jenny topless. He had seen Jenny naked. This was different somehow. She also wore her hair in a ponytail down her back, held in place by a brass metal tube rather than just tied. Her dress was sleeveless and backless, a waterfall of pink sequins flowing down from her neck and over her curves, sparkling with her every step down the stairs.


    ¡°Well?¡± She said when she finally made it to Kyle. ¡°Do I look like a modern American girl?¡±


    ¡°I have absolutely no idea,¡± Kyle admitted. ¡°But I know you look amazing.¡±


    Jenny smiled, and it was like nothing else mattered in the entire world.


    ¡°Ahahahahahahahahaha!¡± Ammeline laughed. ¡°Yes, they all do look gorgeous don''t they? Don''t forget I''m the one who helped pick out all their outfits! The beauty and magic of your dates tonight brought to you by Ammeline Trent! Though I must admit I had excellent material to work with.¡±


    Ensure your favorite authors get the support they deserve. Read this novel on the original website.


    ¡°You, on the other hand, look like a drunk warthog,¡± Conrad said.


    ¡°Yes I did notice you had failed to comment on my beauty,¡± Ammeline said. ¡°The other men in the room have dates, and it would be rude for them to admit I''m the most beautiful woman in the room, but it''s part of your duties as my own date.¡±


    ¡°Yes wow,¡± Conrad said. ¡°You are so gorgeous. Cannot believe. Much horny. I want The Sex.¡±


    ¡°Oh stop being an idiot,¡± Ammeline smacked him in the chest with the back of her hand.


    ¡°Seriously though you look great,¡± Conrad said.


    ¡°I know.¡± Ammeline turned to the others. ¡°Alright everyone, you have all evening to stare at my handiwork in awe. For now, we''re running a little late since the boys took so long to get here.¡±


    ¡°Since the boys-¡± Evan choked.


    ¡°Come on everyone!¡± Ammeline talked over him. ¡°The car''s waiting!¡±


    They filed out and climbed into Ammeline''s limo. And this time it was a real limo, every bit as luxurious as the car she''d taken Betty and Jenny to the mall in and twice as big. There was plenty of room for them all, and within a few moments they were on their way to the school.


    ¡°It just occurred to me it''s kind of dumb to drive there,¡± Kevin said. ¡°Jenny and I walk it every day.¡±


    ¡°But we''re in these pretty dresses!¡± Jenny said. ¡°They''d get dirty.¡±


    ¡°Besides,¡± Ammeline reminded him. ¡°Entrances.¡±


    ¡°Evan you better watch your hands or I swear--¡±


    ¡°I''m not doing anything!¡± Evan said, holding his hands up in the air. ¡°I was just shifting around in my seat.¡±


    ¡°Come on,¡± Trevor said. ¡°It''s a nice night, Evan, don''t.¡±


    ¡°Why''s everyone gotta accuse me?¡± Evan said.


    ¡°Because you are almost always guilty,¡± Betty pointed out.


    ¡°Alright fair, but this time I''m serious!¡± Evan insisted. ¡°Something''s poking into me....is this your fencing sword? Why would you bring that to a dance?¡±


    ¡°Ah,¡± Ammeline said. ¡°Well. Consider it, uhm, a good luck charm.¡±


    ¡°Swords used to be traditional at dances,¡± Conrad said. ¡°Part of your military uniform. And handy in case you needed to defend your lady''s honor.¡±


    ¡°I''m your lady now?¡± Ammeline asked with a raised eyebrow.


    ¡°No of course not,¡± Conrad laughed. ¡°I''m your lady. I''m also a complete slut so you''re going to need that thing tonight, keep it handy.¡±


    Kyle decided he was going to like Conrad.


    They hadn''t been paying attention to the windows, so the first they knew that they''d arrived was when the car ground to a stop. Ammeline''s driver opened the door, and under her direction they stepped out in pairs.


    ¡°Alright I have to admit,¡± Jenny giggled. ¡°Everyone looking at us like this is kind of fun. Maybe Ammeline has a point about entrances.¡±


    ¡°They''re mostly looking at you,¡± Kyle said. ¡°But maybe you''ve got a point.¡±


    Plenty of people in the parking lot were dressed up, but most of them looked like Kevin. They''d found their formal clothes in the bottom of drawers and the backs of closets. It made it a lot easier to appreciate Ammeline''s special touch. They were early, so they were through the line at the door in only a few minutes and inside the slowly filling gym, which had been lined with streamers and balloons.


    ¡°So I''ve never actually been to one of these,¡± Kyle admitted. ¡°Not sure what we''re supposed to do.¡±


    ¡°Me either,¡± Jenny admitted. ¡°It was very different in my time. Hey look, Tanya!¡±


    ¡°Wait!¡± Kyle said, but Jenny was pulling him away towards a table in the back, where Tanya stood wearing a white shirt and black pants. She was arranging drink cups on a table.


    ¡°Hi!¡± Jenny said cheerfully.


    ¡°Yes,¡± Tanya sighed. ¡°Hello.¡±


    ¡°So are you dancing with anyone tonight?¡± Jenny asked.


    ¡°No,¡± Tanya said. ¡°I''m on the planning committee because I''m on the student council, but that''s all the time I have to spend on this nonsense.¡±


    ¡°But I like nonsense!¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°I''ve noticed,¡± Tanya murmured. Then a little louder, ¡°most people do, that''s why events like this exist. Go, have your fun. And let me get on with my work.¡±


    ¡°But talking to you is fun!¡± Jenny said. Tanya put a hand over her face, and Kyle tried not to laugh as around them the dance got started for real.


    ¡°Looks like things are getting started,¡± Eric said, bowing to Goldie and extending his hand. ¡°This dance, m''lady?¡±


    ¡°Don''t say m''lady,¡± Goldie snapped. ¡°But fine, I guess that''s part of the bet too.¡±


    ¡°Of course,¡± Evan said. ¡°But honestly Goldie, what I wanted from the bet was to show up with a gorgeous woman. Give that punch in the face moment to everybody.¡±


    ¡°You didn''t want a date,¡± Goldie said slowly. ¡°You wanted revenge.¡±


    ¡°Exactly,¡± Evan grinned. ¡°So if you want to ditch me right now, that''s fine.¡±


    Goldie stared at Evan, her arms crossed in front of her.


    ¡°That earned you a dance,¡± she said. ¡°One dance.¡±


    ¡°I can''t believe my luck!¡± Evan said. ¡°Surely, no man has ever been so blessed...¡±


    ¡°Don''t press your luck jackass,¡± Goldie said. ¡°Come on.¡±


    ¡°Hey Trevor!¡± the redhead said, leaning over to show off her cleavage. ¡°I didn''t know you were coming to the dance! How about we hit the dance floor?¡±


    She had stepped right past Betty to say it, and as she talked she shifted her shoulder to kind of block Betty''s view of Trevor. Aside from that, she gave no sign she knew Betty was there.


    ¡°I''m here with a date,¡± Trevor said, grabbing Betty''s arm and pulling her closer.


    ¡°Oh she won''t mind if we have one little dance!¡± the redhead said, barely looking at Betty. ¡°Right?¡±


    ¡°No of course not,¡± Betty adjusted her glasses. ¡°Trevor and I are here as friends, not lovers. However I would recommend he not do anything more than dance with you.¡±


    ¡°What do you mean?¡± The redhead asked icily.


    ¡°You purchased rash ointment from my father''s clinic the other day,¡± Betty said. ¡°Considering how much of your skin is revealed by your outfit tonight, I can only assume the rash in question is somewhere intimate....¡±


    ¡°You little--!¡± The redhead sputtered, taking a step back. ¡°How dare you? That''s private!¡±


    ¡°Yes,¡± Betty looked confused. ¡°That''s what I just said.¡±


    The redhead sputtered, turned away, and stormed off. Trevor went red in the face as he tried to hold down a fit of giggles.


    ¡°Are you alright?¡± Betty asked.


    ¡°Yeah,¡± Trevor said. ¡°I mean I might be about to burst something if you''re that amazing all night, but yeah.¡±


    ¡°Amazing how?¡± Betty asked. ¡°I was merely talking.¡±


    ¡°That''s part of what''s so amazing,¡± Danny said. ¡°You don''t even know what you did to her just now, do you? Not really.¡±


    ¡°No,¡± Betty said. ¡°I do not. Should I apologize?¡±


    ¡°NO!¡± Trevor said. ¡°No, Betty, under absolutely no circumstances should you apologize.¡±


    ¡°Hm,¡± Betty said thoughtfully. ¡°Oh, I see. She was being rude to me.¡±


    ¡°Extremely,¡± Trevor said.


    ¡°I do not always pick up on that,¡± Betty said. ¡°Evan once said he associated me with an old song lyric. ¡°That''s no way to treat someone who''s feelings don''t get hurt.¡±


    ¡°I think it fits,¡± Trevor said. ¡°Anyway I kind of counted on it. Girls like Jessica would treat whoever I brought like that regardless, but I figured you could handle it. I didn''t expect you to shut her down that hard though, that was amazing.¡±


    ¡°So I am here primarily as your bodyguard,¡± Betty said.


    ¡°I mean maybe?¡± Trevor shrugged. ¡°Not just that, though.¡±


    ¡°I do not understand other people very well,¡± Betty admitted. ¡°I have always felt a little bit like I was outside the world, looking in. It is true I do not feel things as much as others seem to, and I often fail to understand normal interactions. I have a much easier time understanding the world of games and stories. Those have rules you can follow, easy patterns to recognize. In the real world, I often get confused. Or miss cues that should tell me what is going on.¡±


    ¡°Okay,¡± Trevor said. ¡°Then how about we make this simple?¡±


    He grabbed Betty around the waist and pulled her into a kiss. She responded, with her mouth at least. The rest of her body did...nothing. She didn''t go stiff in his arms, or limp, or even move. But she returned the kiss, and he was the one who pulled away.


    ¡°I see,¡± Betty adjusted her glasses. ¡°If lust has overcome you--¡±


    ¡°Betty!¡± Trevor said. ¡°Listen, I''m not saying you''re not gorgeous but that''s not what I was getting at.¡±


    ¡°I understand,¡± Betty said. ¡°Mostly. But you understand I was just shot down, correct? The first time I expressed feelings for anyone else.¡±


    ¡°I do,¡± Trevor said. ¡°I''m not trying to...dammit Betty I don''t know.¡±


    ¡°If neither of us understands,¡± Betty adjusted her glasses, ¡°then we are on equal footing. That is an unusual experience for me.¡±


    ¡°I suppose that''s one way to look at it,¡± Trevor said.


    ¡°I would enjoy an attempt to dance,¡± Betty said.


    ¡°I think I would too.¡± Trevor took her arm.


    ¡°Are you sick?¡± Goldie asked, when they were off the dance floor taking a break. ¡°You haven''t tried to grope me once tonight. Well not since the car.¡±


    ¡°That wasn''t me!¡± Evan insisted. ¡°Look, I''m trying to be on my best behavior, alright? Unless you want me to grope you...¡±


    ¡°No.¡±


    ¡°Worth a shot,¡± Evan sighed. ¡°Listen Goldie, I''m...something happened to me lately. You could kinda say I got smarter. And I took a look at where my life was going, and I didn''t like it.¡±


    ¡°That so?¡± Goldie raised an eyebrow.


    ¡°Yeah,¡± Evan said. ¡°It''s so. Listen, the bet...the bet got you here, I got my entrance, great. But I swear there''s more to me than it looks like on the surface, okay? How about I promise not to touch you for the entire night, I mean unless it kind of happens accidentally when we''re dancing and....let me try that again. I promise not to intentionally touch you for the rest of the night, and maybe we can kind of pretend this is an actual date?¡±


    ¡°I assumed chances to grope me were what you wanted out of this date in the first place,¡± Goldie said.


    ¡°I don''t want that,¡± Evan said. ¡°I want...more. And no, I don''t mean sex I don''t need the sarcastic remark.¡±


    Goldie chewed her lip thoughtfully.


    ¡°Alright,¡± Goldie said. ¡°Okay. We''ll see. Tonight is a date. Impress me and you might get a second.¡±


    ¡°That''s all I''m after,¡± Evan said. ¡°Back to the dance floor?¡±


    ¡°Sure,¡± Goldie said. ¡°Watch the hands.¡±


    Jenny got all the attention, but Kyle didn''t mind.


    It kind of surprised him, that he didn''t mind.


    If you''d asked him before he''d have said he''d be jealous. Scary jealous. He could far too easily see himself becoming the kind of aggressive, possessive boyfriend nobody wants to be around. But when Jenny took over the dance floor with some kind of undulating dance that must have come from ancient Uzbedi, all he felt was a kind of odd pride. Here she was, drawing every eye in the room, and she''d agreed to come to the dance with him.


    And there was a little vindictive joy in seeing the faces of people who''d ignored, looked down on, or even made fun of him their entire life twist with jealousy when her dance ended and she ran back into his arms. He wasn''t super proud of it, but he couldn''t deny it was fun.


    ¡°They like my dances!¡± Jenny said. ¡°I wonder if they still dance like that back in Uzbedi?¡±


    ¡°I bet someone does,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Modern times try to keep old traditions alive. There''s probably at least a few people.¡±


    ¡°Good,¡± Jenny said. ¡°I like a lot of things about the modern world better, but it''s nice to think some of the things I remember are still around.¡±


    The music started up again, tinkling and soft.


    ¡°This song sounds different,¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°Slow dance,¡± Kyle told her. ¡°Come on, I can at least copy this one from what I''ve seen on TV.¡±


    He led her out onto the dance floor and the pressed themselves together, moving in time to the music. A hush seemed to fall over the entire room, so much so that when they spoke it was almost in a whisper.


    ¡°Well this one''s easy,¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°It''s most an excuse to get all close like this,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°We can do that at home all the time though!¡± Jenny giggled. ¡°Uhm, Kyle?¡±


    ¡°What?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°Are you...¡± Jenny bit her lip worriedly. ¡°Are you happy you found the lamp?¡±


    ¡°Of course I am,¡± Kyle said. ¡°I met you that way, didn''t I?¡±


    ¡°It''s just...¡± Jenny sighed. ¡°I''ve caused a lot of trouble.¡±


    ¡°You didn''t cause anything,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°But Danny...¡±


    ¡°Was a psycho to start with,¡± Kyle said firmly. ¡°Besides, he''s in jail.¡±

 Chapter 22: Night of the Dance, Part 2

    ¡°O''Brien!¡± The guard said. ¡°Get up! There here to transfer you.¡±


    ¡°Right right,¡± Danny said, getting up. ¡°Got to go to another prison for the trial, right? Doesn''t make any damn sense to me, but sure whatever.¡±


    ¡°Hands through the slot,¡± The guard said. Danny offered his hands and the guard placed handcuffs on them. Then the door was opened, and Danny led out of his cell.


    Do it! The efreet shouted in his mind.


    ¡°Not yet,¡± Danny muttered.


    ¡°What was that?¡± The guard asked, as the door to the prison slid open.


    ¡°I said it''s better to wait until you open the door,¡± Danny said.


    ¡°Wha--¡± the guard said, but Danny was already grabbing his face.


    His arm from the elbow down was so hot it glowed white. He''d melted through the cuffs, and where he grabbed the guard crackled and sizzled immediately with the heat. The guard let out a gurgling scream, but when he tried to grab Danny''s arm to pull away he only succeeded in burning off his own fingers. His head cooked in a matter of seconds, at which point Danny tossed the charred corpse casually aside.


    ¡°That was fun,¡± Danny said.


    They''re shooting at you, the efreet told him.


    ¡°Do I need to care?¡± Danny asked.


    No.


    The bullets were vaporizing in a flash of white heat inches from his body. Danny laughed, walking through the gunfire towards the idiots who were dumb enough to shoot at him.


    Don''t forget what we''re here for, the efreet warned.


    ¡°Yeah yeah,¡± Danny said, grabbing a guard by the wrist, burning through skin and bone until a charred hand fell twitching to the floor. ¡°This is all just a warmup. This is where the real fun gets started.¡±


    ¡°That was so much fun!¡± Jenny said, hanging on to Kyle''s arm. ¡°I think I like dances.¡±


    ¡°I still don''t,¡± Kyle smiled. ¡°But hanging out with you all night was pretty fun.¡±


    ¡°We hang out all the time anyway,¡± Jenny pointed out.


    ¡°Yeah but this was different,¡± Kyle said. ¡°This was a date. Now, if...¡±


    What had been a distant noise, easily ignored, was suddenly right beside him. The firetruck blasted past him so fast he thought the siren was going to tear him open. And it wasn''t the last, police cars and ambulances and more firetrucks streamed past it in desperate hurry.


    ¡°Ow,¡± Jenny rubbed her ear and said when the screaming fleet of emergency vehicles had gone by. ¡°Where are they all going?¡±


    ¡°I think over there,¡± Kyle said, pointing to where an orange glow was beginning to taint the night sky in the distance.


    ¡°A fire?¡± Jenny craned her neck. ¡°What''s over in that direction?¡±


    ¡°The jail,¡± Kyle said. ¡°There''s a huge fire coming from the jail. Where Danny is.¡±


    He wasn''t surprised in the slightest when his phone rang.


    ¡°Tanya,¡± he said as he put the phone on speaker. ¡°We''re seeing it too.¡±


    ¡°It has to be O''Brien,¡± Tanya said over the phone. ¡°He wasn''t just a carrier for the curse. He''s made some kind of pact with the efreet.¡±


    ¡°So what do we do about it?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°I think I know where he''s going,¡± Tanya said. ¡°If his pact with the efreet was completed, he''d never have stayed in jail this long. They can''t complete it until they meet in person.¡±


    ¡°He can''t just do a circle like Betty and her cat?¡±


    ¡°No, this isn''t a familiar bond, it''s something deeper. They''ll have to meet up. But if the efreet could move, it would have gone to meet Kyle at the jail. He must be too injured from his fight with you still. And the most likely place for him to be, given everything we know, is the ruins of Danny''s house. I''m going there to seal the efreet, I should be able to do it on my own when he''s weakened.¡±


    ¡°What do we do?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°Delay him,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Sealing a demon takes time. Buy me as much as you can.¡±


    ¡°Got it,¡± Kyle nodded, though of course Tanya couldn''t see him.


    ¡°Kyle,¡± Tanya added, ¡°just...be careful, okay?¡±


    The phone clicked off.


    ¡°That was nice of her to say,¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°Maybe you should...¡±


    ¡°Don''t you dare say head home!¡± Jenny cut him off. ¡°Do I need to remind you how useful my sparkly eyes trick has been? Besides...¡±


    ¡°Yeah okay,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Climb on my back. We''re about to see what colossal-node physical enhancement is good for. And hope we can catch up to Danny before he hurts anyone else.¡±


    Danny threw a burning, molten car through the second story window of a nearby building, laughing like a madman.


    Which, it suddenly occurred to him, he probably was. Not that he cared.


    ¡°This is fun!¡± Danny laughed. ¡°I could do this all night!¡±


    No you couldn''t! The efreet snapped in his mind. I dunno if you noticed, but I can''t block too many bullets at once like this. If they swarm you, you''re fucked.


    ¡°Know what I think?¡± Danny said. ¡°I think you''re trying to talk me into something I don''t need. I think I can handle Kyle just fine the way I am, and you just want more.¡±


    Think, dammit! The Efreet snarled in Danny''s mind. I was at full power when Kyle ripped me apart like this. And you''re not even close to my full power right now. What do you think...


    He was cut off by more screaming sirens. A cop car swerved around the corner, barreling towards him with lights flashing.


    ¡°He''s going to try to run me over,¡± Danny laughed.


    Leave him behind and go! The efreet urged.


    ¡°Nah,¡± Danny said. ¡°He''s gotta pay for that.¡±


    Danny crouched down and caught the cop car by the bumper as it tried to run him over, crumpling the front of the car. The metal began to heat, and the driver dived out of the vehicle and ran away down the street as his car smoked and melted in Danny''s grasp.


    ¡°Hey!¡± Danny called after him, ripping the bumper off the car. ¡°Where do you think you''re going?¡±


    He threw the flaming bumper after the fleeing officer. The cop screamed, ducking under the projectile and running off around the corner as it buried itself in the brickwork of a building.


    ¡°Lame,¡± Danny sighed, tossing the car casually over his shoulder. There was a crashing noise as it hit the pavement, and to his surprise the sound of screeching tires. He turned to see a limousine swerving to avoid the molten car, overturning in the street with wheels spinning in the air. ¡°Oh but wait, we might have more playmates!¡±


    He had just started walking towards the upturned limo when the door opened and someone crawled out. That rich girl. Ammeline, right? That was her name. Once she was out she pulled out some other guy Danny was pretty sure he''d never seen before, and then yet another guy from the driver''s seat. She didn''t even act like she noticed Danny was there until she had them both out of the way.


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    Why did she have an athletic bag over her shoulder?


    ¡°Danny O''Brien,¡± Ammeline said. ¡°I see. You seem to have gained some kind of power.¡±


    ¡°Looks like it,¡± Danny laughed, holding up his burning hands.


    Danny I don''t like this, the efreet hissed in his mind. She''s too calm. Something''s up.


    ¡°Then I should burn her face off nice and quick, right?¡± Danny laughed, charging in. Ammeline pulled her fencing sword from her bag and dropped into a fighting stance, tip pointed towards him. She stood there as calm as if the charging maniac blazing with unholy fire was no more threatening than a summer breeze.


    Look out look out dodge dodge doge!


    Danny sensed the danger a second after the efreet warned him. He came up short in his charge, leaping backwards as far as he could go. It wasn''t quite enough. The force of Ammeline''s thrust tore a strip out of his side, not deep but viciously painful. Blood was pouring down his side by the time he landed.


    ¡°What the hell!?¡± Danny sputtered. She hadn''t even touched him. It was like the sword was wrapped in a hurricane of slicing blades.


    ¡°I don''t know where this power came from,¡± Ammeline said, tearing off the bottom of her dress to give her legs more room to move. ¡°It came to me after the gas explosion. I suspect Kyle may know something about it, but it never felt like the right time to ask. What I do know is that power like this must be used to defend against people who would use it to hurt others. I mean it seems obvious doesn''t it? So I think...¡±


    She dropped into a fighting stance, and all of a sudden Danny didn''t think her fighting stances or her blunt tipped fencing sword looked silly anymore.


    ¡°...I think I am supposed to fight this battle,¡± Ammeline continued. ¡°I do hope Kyle does know something about this. If not who am I supposed to have bask in the glory of my victory? Ahahahahaha...¡±


    ¡°Little bitch!¡± Danny snarled.


    Get the hell away!


    ¡°I can take her!¡± Danny insisted charging for Ammeline. ¡°Now that I''m ready for that sword...¡±


    His plan was to grapple her before she could bring the sword into play, but she unleashed a fury of thrusts in his direction long before he reached her. Spiraling drills of energy flew from the tip of her sword with each thrust, piercing huge holes in whatever they touched. Danny was forced back again, dodging and weaving, but still one of them hit him in the shoulder, drawing more blood.


    ¡°GRAAAAHHHHHHH!!!¡± Danny screamed in confusion.


    Do you get it now!? The efreet screamed in his head. And she''s just been practicing by herself. Kyle and the others have been getting actual training!


    But Danny was too far gone to listen. Hands burning he reached down and ripped up a huge section of the asphault, bigger than he was. He threw it at Ammeline, but the fencer stood her ground. When her piercing shots only chipped off pieces she changed her stance, slashing the lump of street to rubble before it reached her.


    Danny was right behind it. Inches behind it, at most. As soon as she removed it from between them he kicked her as hard as he could in the chest. She flew backwards, slamming into the side of the limo and denting in the door. She slumped, blood trickling from the corner of her mouth. She coughed and hacked up more.


    ¡°See?¡± Danny demanded. ¡°I told you I could take her!¡±


    Okay great! The efreet said desperately. Sure! Good work kid! Now get the hell out of her before...


    ¡°I said I was going to melt her face off,¡± Danny said, grabbing Ammeline by the collar of her dress and lifting her up. He raised one hand over his head, glowing with white-hot power. ¡°And that''s what I''m gonna do.¡±


    ¡°NO!¡± someone screamed, and suddenly Danny''s world went crazy, flashing colors and sparkling light. He couldn''t see. He couldn''t even tell if he was standing up or lying down. He could tell he was stumbling, moving, but the sparkling world seemed to roll and heave beneath him.


    And then pain. The pain was clear, he could make out the pain.


    It was only a second later when his head cleared. He''d been punched clear back down the street, and his nose felt like it was broken. Blood was streaming down his lips. Ammeline was slumped against the limo again, with Kyle and the Jenny girl standing over her. Right, the genie, the efreet told him about that. That''s why she was pinkish-purple.


    Events clicked into place. Kyle had punched the shit out of him.


    Again.


    ¡°I''ll explain later,¡± Kyle was promising Ammeline.


    ¡°You''d better,¡± the rich girl managed weakly.


    ¡°You''ll be okay,¡± Jenny was promising. ¡°I''m sorry, I shouldn''t have...¡±


    ¡°You didn''t hit me.¡± Ammeline told her. Danny shook his head. He had more important things to focus on.


    Like getting the hell away, the efreet said. You could just barely handle her. You can''t handle Kyle. And you sure as hell can''t handle him with the genie girl ready to give you another taste of that stupid light show trick.


    ¡°Alright,¡± Danny climbed to his feet. ¡°Alright. Fine. You made your point.¡±


    Finally. And hurry up. The sorceress chick is here, I think she''s gonna try to seal me up.


    ¡°You didn''t feel like mentioning this before?¡± Danny snarled.


    I''m not the one who''s been wasting time!


    ¡°Danny!¡± Kyle called after him. ¡°Stop it! It''s over.¡±


    ¡°I haven''t even gotten started!¡± Danny snapped back.


    ¡°That was a terrible line,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Come on man, look around. Look what what''s happened to you. Look what you''re doing.¡±


    Danny looked around at the street. Molten cars were everywhere. The buildings were on fire. The only reason there weren''t any emergency vehicles nearby was because Danny had already melted them. Some of the melted cop cars had charred corpses still inside.


    ¡°I know right?¡± Danny grinned. ¡°How awesome is this!¡±


    Run when it happens, the efreet told him, then without waiting for a response Danny felt the power surge. A flash of light burst from his body, blinding everyone but him. In the moment of confusion, Danny ran.


    He''d fight Kyle once he and the efreet were together at full power.


    Tanya reached the smoking hole that had once been the O''Brien house still wearing her shirt and pants from the dance. She hadn''t taken the time to change, only to grab a spellbook and hurry to the spot. If she was right, this was where she''d find the efreet. Now if only the other thing she needed would show up...


    Turned out, things she needed and things she didn''t need showed up at the same time. Trevor showed up with Betty in tow, good she could use both of them. Eric, with his physical and mental enhancements, came running from the other direction. However tagging along behind him was Goldie, who Tanya had absolutely no need for whatsoever.


    ¡°What is she doing here?¡± Tanya demanded.


    ¡°She wouldn''t let me go without answers,¡± Eric shrugged.


    ¡°A lot of answers,¡± Goldie snapped. ¡°One minute I''m having a surprisingly tolerable evening at the dance and the next this idiot is going all ¡°justice is calling¡± on me.¡±


    ¡°It''s kind of hard to¡ª¡± Trevor started to say, but Betty cut him off.


    ¡°Danny O''Brien has gained supernatural powers from a demon and is now coming here to summon that same demon to gain more power,¡±


    Goldie stared at them.


    ¡°This is my magical cat,¡± Betty added, letting Moonlight poke his head out of her bag.


    ¡°Mrow,¡± Moonlight agreed.


    ¡°Right,¡± Goldie said, disbelief and confusion clear on her face. ¡°Okay, fine. Just...just give me a moment to process all those sentences you guys just said.¡±


    ¡°Nope!¡± Tanya said. ¡°Don''t have time.¡±


    She waved her hands in the air and lines of softly glowing purple energy wove through the air, wrapping around the ruined house and forming a complex pattern of circles in circles and strange symbols.


    ¡°Holy shit!¡± Goldie said.


    ¡°Betty get over here!¡± Tanya ordered. ¡°This is a lot more stable with two people. Other side of the circle, just put your power in I''ll do the rest.¡±


    With Betty in place the circle glowed more strongly. In the very center of it the rubble shifted, and something rancid and rotting rose from beneath.


    It was the efreet, or at least some of it. Organs pulsed and oozed from the various holes in it''s torso, and it the entire lower half was missing. It had obviously decayed, rotting like a corpse. If it had to try and survive much longer like this it would never make it, wasting away to nothing after Kyle nearly tore it apart. But if Danny got here...


    So you''re trying to seal my power, the efreet sneered in their heads. Tanya wasn''t surprised it couldn''t talk out loud anymore, with the state it was in. Not a bad idea. But the thing you''re forgetting is, I got options.


    The efreet started mumbling words, and all around them glowing orange portals opened. Dinosaur headed bugs chittered and screamed, clawing their way through them.


    ¡°Like the alley!¡± Evan shouted. ¡°Remember everyone, they''re weakness is being hit really hard in the head with a metal pipe!¡±


    ¡°That''s most people''s weakness!¡± Goldie pointed out.


    ¡°Keep them off us!¡± Tanya shouted. ¡°If we seal him the portals close too, then I can help you with those things!¡±


    ¡°Row!¡± Moonlight said, leaping at the nearest monster. As he did he twisted, molding like taffy in the air. What landed on the hapless fire demon wasn''t a housecat but an eight foot long black and silver stripped tiger that tore it to shreds.


    ¡°That works too!¡± Eric said. Tanya wasn''t even sure where he''d gotten a pipe, but he started darting around smashing monsters in the head. It took a couple of whacks to keep them down, but he was doing plenty of damage. One of the creatures got close, but Goldie appeared with her own pipe and whacked it in the head until it stopped moving.


    Without any special powers. Huh. Maybe these things were unusually weak to metal pipes.


    ¡°I don''t get what''s going on exactly,¡± Goldie panted, ¡°but summon demon equals bad, right? I''ll help. And then this can all be explained to me very patiently afterwards.¡±


    ¡°If there is an afterwards,¡± Eric complained. ¡°There''s a lot of these things, Tanya! We could sue some help!¡±


    ¡°You have it,¡± Trevor sighed. ¡°There goes my sports career...¡±


    And Trevor finally tapped into his Titanic core. She could feel him focusing it on his body. But it was more power than a body could handle at once, so it bled out of him as glowing light. Tanya cursed herself for never teaching him what to do with it...but then he seemed to figure it out on his own. The light tightened to his skin, growing duller and firmer, until Trevor stood wearing a suit of slick, sleek, head to toe armor that glowed softly in the dark.


    After that, it wasn''t even fair.


    ¡°Careful!¡± Tanya shouted a warning. ¡°The blowback from your punches could kill somebody!¡±


    ¡°Duly noted,¡± Trevor said, his voice sounding tinny from within the glowing armor. He waded through the monsters like they weren''t even there. They shattered as he walked into them, swinging punches right and left.


    Still not enough, the efreet said in her mind.


    ¡°How do you figure that?¡± Tanya grunted. ¡°We''ll have you sealed in a second, and this will all be over.¡±


    Because my guy is smarter than you give him credit for.


    Danny''s hand burst up from underneath her, erupting from the dirt with a spray of smoke and clamping white hot around her ankle. She defended herself with magic by reflex, but it still seared her skin and made her scream as she lost control of the sealing spell.


    ¡°Tanya!¡± Betty said. ¡°I cannot control this on my own-!¡±


    The spell circle burst like a bubble and Danny erupted from the dirt, throwing Tanya aside. He strode across the ruins of his old home to where the fetid corpse of the efreet hovered in the air.


    Finally, the efreet said.


    ¡°Finally,¡± Danny agreed, reaching out to grab the demon''s hand.


    ¡°No-!¡± Trevor shouted, rushing towards them, but it was too late. A burst of power flared from the two of them, covering the world in painful orange light.


    When it cleared, Danny and the efreet were gone. In their place was...something new.

 Chapter 23: Heroes, Horrors, and Fairy Tales

    The newly born monstrosity looked a little bit like Danny, though he''d never been that tall and muscular. Beyond that it wasn''t even human. Its skin was a dull reddish orange, its eyes glowed red hot. It hovered over the ground on burning dragonfly wings, efreet wings. Its fingers ended in wicked claws, and spikes ran up its forearms, getting shorter the closer they got to the elbow. Something similar has happening from ankle to knee, and its feet were two-towed and hook clawed. When it laughed, fire flicked out around gleaming white fangs.


    ¡°Finally!¡± It roared in a voice like a thousand buzzing bees. ¡°It is finished! We are one. I am...Danny. Of the two names, it seems I like the name Danny best. How strange. Now who''d like to die first?¡±


    ¡°DANNY!¡± A new voice roared from across the road. All eyes turned to see Kyle standing on a rooftop, with Jenny standing beside him. He''d arrived only seconds before, just enough time to land on the roof and slide Jenny off his back.


    ¡°We have a volunteer!¡± the monster laughed. ¡°You know I''ve got you to thank for this, Kyle. It was our grudge against you that let us combine as one. That took our power to such heights. But you know what Kyle?¡±


    Kyle was already moving, leaping from the roof towards Danny with his fist raised.


    ¡°You just don''t really matter anymore.¡±


    Danny raised his hand and let out a puff of flame. It wasn''t a beam, or solid enough to call a fireball, just a poof of roiling fire that slammed into Kyle like a truck. He stopped in midair, lost within the flames, and when his burning body fell from the cloud of smoke it was nothing but a charred and steaming husk.


    Jenny screamed.


    The most horrible thing about it was that Kyle wasn''t dead.


    A normal body would have died. Half his face was melted away, skin and muscle fused to bone. His chest was burned open, and Jenny could see charred organs pulsing within. She cradled his charred, smoking head in her hands, tears pouring down her face.


    ¡°I''m sorry,¡± she sobbed. ¡°I''m sorry, Kyle. I did this. I-I''m going to try and fix it, okay? I''m going to try and fix it, but I''m gonna need you to help. I hope you can even hear me. I need you to hear me, and help me save you.¡±


    Behind her, the others took the fight to Danny.


    Danny laughed as they all rushed towards him. Were they all really so eager to die?


    He banished the monsters he''d summoned back through their portals, and closed the portals themselves. This would be too easy otherwise.


    The first one to come at him was the cat. Five Elements Cat. He knew what that was, now. Well half of him always had. It was a powerful creature, and Betty was a powerful summoner, but she was inexperienced. She could do so much more for her summoned creature than pour her own power into it. At least she''d figured out what the ¡°elements¡± part meant. The cat that lunged for his throat wasn''t black and silver anymore, the silver stripes had changed to deep blue. Things like fins had grown on it''s legs and back. He could feel ¡°water¡± pouring off it in waves, the power of its very essence the element that countered his own.


    That was fine. Danny knew what he was doing. He smacked the cat out of the air, steam pouring into the sky from where they struck. Fire and water don''t mix, after all. He felt his own power weaken when it touched the cats water essence, but he just poured on more. Much more than the cat and it''s fledgling summoner could counter. So even though it held the advantage, the cat began to weaken in the heat.


    Trevor came in next. The armor was impressive. He couldn''t take a direct hit from one of those punches. But fire''s power was the power to consume. Every second Trevor stood too close to Danny sapped his strength, and Danny was able to dodge his swinging punches without too much trouble, taking to the air on his wings when he needed to. Not too far though. He wouldn''t want to spoil the fun.


    And oh, it was worth the wait. The moment when his fist landed on Trevor''s face, cracking his helmet, was absolute bliss. The impact threw the armored man across the street, skipping him off the concrete. With him out of the way Danny grabbed the cat around the throat, choking the snarling animal before he threw it back at its summoner. Betty dived out of the way as the cat fell to the ground, rushing to its side as soon as it landed. That could be trouble, as long as she had any power to spare she could restore the cat to full strength.


    Danny had better go kill her.


    Before he could a jet of water slammed into his chest and sent him flying backwards. It angled downward, forcing him into the ground. He whirled around looking for the source and found Tanya, kneeling down to keep weight off her injured ankle. Her entire body was tattooed in glowing vines, stark in contrast to her coal dark skin, and green power played around her hands. She had conjured roots from the ground, which he''d been prepared for. Fire burned wood to ash. But she hadn''t attacked him with the vines.


    The roots had formed into something not unlike a fire hose. Below ground they must have tapped directly into the water main. Dammit, he''d forgotten she wasn''t like the others. The others couldn''t match the experience that came with his efreet half. Tanya, on the other hand, was an experienced sorceress. She knew how to use her power, and make up for her weaknesses.


    With a roar and burst of power he flew away from the jet of water, the stream folling close after him. But he could outspeed it, even with Tanya directing it personally. He just need a chance to...


    From within the thick stream of water came Betty''s cat, claws slashing through the air and gouging a deep checkerboard in Danny''s chest. Danny bellowed in pain and frustration, molten blood seeping from his fresh wound. Before he could respond the jet of water caught up, slamming him backwards and dropping him to the ground once again.


    Fine. Fine then. If up was no good....


    Smoke and steam poured out from his body as he melted into the ground, escaping the spray of water underneath the asphalt. Once he was underground he found a part of the root system Tanya had created and poured all the fire he could manage into it. The root burned away, and he could hear the press of water slacken up above. Before Tanya had time to do anything else he burst from the ground again. She was more prepared for it, this time. If her leg had been whole, she''d have been able to dodge completely. But her leg wasn''t whole, she was injured and could barely even stand, so the best she did was stumble back far enough for Danny''s vicious uppercut to only knock the wind out of her instead of going right through her stomach.


    Danny stood over her, raising his fist to finish her off, when the cat came snarling in. But he was ready for it this time, really ready, and he grabbed it in midair. It clawed at his back but he held onto it in a vicious bear hug, squeezing the life out of it.


    ¡°No!¡± Betty shouted, darting out of hiding to try and break them apart. Danny laughed, flinging the cat in her direction. This time she and the cat connected with an ugly crack, and she fell to the ground unconscious. The cat fell on top of her, shrinking down to normal house cat size.


    ¡°Yeah!¡± Danny yelled at them. ¡°That''s what you bitches get! That''s what--¡±


    The lead pipe slammed across the back of his skull and the world swam. He whirled on his attacker to find Evan standing before him, gripping his pipe like a sword.


    Evan.


    Fucking Evan Warnick.


    Where the hell did he get off?


    ¡°Pissant,¡± Danny snarled. ¡°I thought you were gonna go hide somewhere and wet yourself.¡±


    ¡°Don''t involve me in your stupid fetishes,¡± Evan said. Danny tried to punch him but the little bastard dodged, catching him on the shoulder with the pipe.


    ¡°Stay still you little piece of shit!¡± Danny snapped.


    ¡°Why would I ever do that?¡± Evan asked, dodging swinging blows and bursts of fire from Danny''s palms. ¡°I saw what you did to Kyle!¡±


    Dany started after him but something caught him from behind. Trevor was up, and even in his cracked armor he was strong enough to hold Danny in place while Evan came at him with the pipe.


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    ¡°Let go of me!¡± Danny insisted.


    ¡°Jeeze man,¡± Trevor said woozily. ¡°Can''t you think of anything to ask for somebody might actually give you?¡±


    Evan was moving in again with the pipe. Danny wasn''t sure, exactly, how many hits he could take to the head with that thing. Evan had dome something to it, powered it up somehow, in a way that kind of reminded him of fighting Ammeline. Who, he remembered, he still had to kill. He didn''t have time to waste here. Danny flared with burning power and reached behind him, managing to catch Trevor by the head. With a roar of effort he hauled Trevor over his should, slamming him down on top of Evan like a hammer. Both of them lay on the ground in a heap, Danny panting as he stood over them.


    ¡°Yeah!¡± Danny roared, buzzing his burning dragonfly wings and slamming his foot down on top of them. ¡°That''s what you get! That''s what you fucking get!¡±


    The wires of the long ranged taser gun hit him in the side and sparked against his skin. He turned slowly to look at Goldie, still holding the stun gun in her hands.


    ¡°Seriously,¡± He asked.


    ¡°I don''t know I''m as surprised as you,¡± Goldie said, her eyes wide with horror. ¡°I just kind of moved.¡±


    ¡°Cool,¡± Danny said. ¡°Great. Now move away, little girl. You don''t have any magic to threaten me with and I''m gonna kill these assholes.¡±


    He raised his foot, ready to stomp down and crush the life out of Trevor and Evan.


    First the world was pain, and then the world was darkness.


    Kyle didn''t know where he was. It felt too...distant, to be death. He felt like death would feel more personal. Instead he floated in blackness, unaware of anything except the fact that he existed, nothing left of him but a thought in the darkness.


    And then there was another thought.


    Cutting through the darkness was a thread of light, pinkish-purple light filled with sparkles that floated through the nothingness and wrapped around him, comforting and somehow urgent. It carried with it the impression of a voice. Jenny''s voice. She sounded desperate. Sad.


    What was she saying?


    He tried to hear.


    ¡°...orry,¡± Jenny''s voice echoed through the endless dark. ¡°I''m s.....fix this...listen...¡±


    Fix what? He needed to see her face. He opened his eyes.


    He regretted it immediately. The pain was back. He could feelhis charred skin cracking as his eyes opened up. But he could see Jenny, leaning over him, tears falling down from her eyes. They splattered against his face, cool and painful at the same time.


    ¡°Kyle!¡± Jenny said, looking into his eyes. ¡°Kyle, can you hear me!?¡±


    Kyle tried to nod. He wasn''t sure if he succeeded. Jenny kept talking anyway.


    ¡°I can still save you,¡± she said. ¡°I need you to make a wish. Remember? I said there was a spell that let wizards make wishes? I need you to cast it on me. Right now. Can you feel it? I''ve already sent my power inside you.¡±


    He could. The thread that had awoken him was still there, sparkling light wrapped around his soul. He tried to answer, and this time he felt his jaw move. It didn''t sound like he made the right noises though.


    ¡°It''s a familiar pact,¡± Jenny said. ¡°Just like Betty and Moonlight. You don''t have to say anything, but you need to feel it. Accept my power. And then my power will be a part of yours, and you can wish yourself better.¡±


    That sounded good. He tried to do what she said, but he could feel it not working. The power slipped away every time he tried to grasp it in his mid. It was like trying to catch a speck of dust floating in the water, reaching for it made it flow away.


    ¡°And then I''ll go back into the lamp,¡± Jenny sobbed.


    What? No.


    ¡°I never should have stayed out in the first place,¡± she said. ¡°I should have told you to put me back in the lamp right away, it had just been so long. But all I do is wreck things.¡±


    That was wrong. He reached a hand up to touch her cheek, try to get her attention, but the mangled stump he weakly raised could barely be called a hand. All that was left on the lump of blackened skin was his pinky finger and thumb. Jenny caught it in her own hand anyway, and pressed it against her cheek.


    ¡°Ever since I got here things have just gotten worse,¡± Jenny continued. ¡°Your life has been in danger, and monsters, and this now, and I kept wanting to tell you I should go back in the lamp but I could never do it, I was too selfish, I...¡±


    Those times she''d gotten all quiet. That''s what she''d been thinking. But she was wrong.


    He had to tell her that was wrong.


    Inside him, he felt the power click into place, tied with his own.


    I have to tell her she''s wrong, he thought, and the wish understood.


    To do that, he had to be better.


    It was like...like someone had turned safety and comfort into a liquid. It poured through his body, and wherever it touched the pain disappeared. Jenny gasped, letting go of his hand as the skin softened and new fingers began to sprout. She was smiling through the tears now.


    ¡°...no,¡± Kyle managed to croak, and as he talked he could feel his throat healing, feel his voice going stronger, feel the charred flesh of his lips giving way to fresh and healthy growth. ¡°No, Jenny that''s not right.¡±


    He sat up. It was amazing how easy it was to move now.


    ¡°You''re not responsible for what Danny did.¡±


    ¡°But if you''d never found the lamp...¡±


    ¡°Danny might have gone nuts with a gun in the mall,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Or maybe the efreet would have gotten you and done something worse. Who knows? We can''t know about that. And if I''d never have found the lamp, it wasn''t just us who''d never have met. It''s all of us. You brought us all together. So don''t you dare try and take responsibility for his choices. Besides....


    ¡°Before you got here my life wasn''t bad. It was flat. Gray. I was just...just existing. Since you came here I''ve made more friends than I ever even dreamed of having. Being with you has made me happier than ever. And not just me, Betty, Evan, Ammaline, Trevor, Tanya...I think maybe Goldie, even. All of us are happier than we''ve been in years. You did that. You brought us together. And I think maybe that''s what I wished for, Jenny. I think I wished for the world to just get better. And it did! All the horrible things Danny did? That''s Danny. You made my world a better place.


    ¡°So you can''t go back in the lamp. It wouldn''t be granting my wish. And what kind of self respecting genie could do that?¡±


    ¡°You mean it?¡± Jenny sniffed.


    Kyle grabbed her and pulled her into their second kiss. This one lasted a little longer than the first, because a sudden warning of danger made Kyle break it off.


    ¡°Wait!¡± Kyle said. ¡°What happened to Danny?¡±


    ¡°Huh?¡± Jenny blinked. ¡°OhmygodI''msosorryhe''sabouttokillTrevorandEvanIforgot-!¡±


    Kyle got there just before Danny brought his foot down, grabbing Danny by the ankle and stopping his foot in midair.


    ¡°What the fuck!?¡± Danny screamed. Kyle pulled his arm back, yanking Danny off his feet, and then snapped it forwards to toss Danny down the street. With a buzz of burning dragonfly wings Danny managed not to hit the ground, turning in the air to hover and glare at Kyle.


    ¡°Why the fuck aren''t you dead?¡± Danny demanded.


    ¡°Would you believe true love''s kiss?¡± Kyle asked. ¡°Because I''m not gonna lie it kind of actually was true love''s kiss.¡±


    Danny let out an inarticulate roar and threw another burst of fire in Kyle''s direction. Kyle batted it away with the back of his head.


    ¡°Ready for it this time,¡± Kyle said. ¡°I think I might be getting a hang of my powers. Almost dying did me some good. Oh and Danny? I guess I''m finally brave enough now.¡±


    ¡°Brave enough for what?¡± Danny sneered.


    Kyle reached for a power he''d never used before. But he needed it now, and after whatever Jenny had done his power flowed so freely he didn''t even think about it. He thrust out his hands, making grabbing motions in the air. Then he pulled them apart in one fast, sharp motion.


    Danny''s burning dragonfly wings tore off in a burst of sparks, dropping him screaming to the ground.


    ¡°All I needed was a bug who''d done something to me,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°I''m going to kill you!¡± Danny bellowed as he charged.


    ¡°I hope I don''t have to fight any other villains,¡± Kyle cracked his knuckles, ¡°but if I do, I really hope they''ve got more original dialogue.¡±


    Dany unleashed a flurry of burning blows, but Kyle blocked them easily. At the end of the day, Danny wasn''t very good at fighting. Kyle and his magically enhanced memory had been training with Trevor for weeks, and Trevor was a lot better. And unlike Trevor, Kyle wasn''t having his strength sapped by Danny''s burning magic. Danny tried, emitting the same consuming aura, but Kyle had power to spare. He canceled out the aura with a thought. It wasn''t long before he was getting his own hits in, fists slamming into Danny''s face and chest and belly, driving him back. Finally he cracked Danny across the chin, dropping the monster to the floor.


    Danny swept a kick at Kyle''s legs, but Kyle jumped out of the way. Danny used the moment of distraction to open up one of the swirling portals. But before anything could come through, Kyle grabbed the edges of the portal and ripped. The burning ring exploded into a thousand sparks, the portal shut completely. Danny appeared behind Kyle''s head, but Kyle stepped aside and smacked him out of the air, bouncing him along the street like a tennis ball.


    ¡°I swear I''m going to kill you!¡± Danny spat as he climbed back to his feet. ¡°I''m not going to stop coming after you! I will kill you and everything you love!¡±


    ¡°I know,¡± Kyle said. ¡°That''s why I decided, this time, I''m going to kill you.¡±


    That brought Danny up short.


    ¡°Did you think I couldn''t because I didn''t do it before?¡± Kyle said. ¡°I don''t know how I''m going to feel once I do it. It might really fuck me up. But we tried the sending you to prison thing and it didn''t take. And like you just said, you''re a threat to everything I care about. Which is a lot more than it was a couple of months ago.¡±


    Kyle wasn''t as strong as Trevor, but he was stronger than Danny. He couldn''t use his magic as well as Tanya, but unlike her his body was enhanced so he could still defend himself if Danny got close. He wasn''t as fast as Evan, but he was tough enough to take the hits. He couldn''t summon creatures to defend himself like Betty, but he could counter all of Danny''s magical auras and neutralize their effect.


    Danny had an answer for the powers each of his opponents had used against him during the fight. But Kyle had an answer for everything Danny could do.


    And when Danny looked in Kyle''s face, he had absolutely no doubt Kyle meant it when he said he was going to kill him.


    Danny turned to run. A fresh pair of fiery wings sprouted from his back as he shot away, trying to get over the rooftops. Kyle held out two fingers, a glowing point of light appearing briefly in front of them before shooting off through Danny''s chest, puncturing his wings as it flew. He feel back, but before he hit the ground Kyle leaped and caught him with one hand in midair, Kyle''s hand closing around the back of his head.


    ¡°Wait!¡± Danny said. ¡°Don''t you wanna know why I came to this town in the first place? I got bosses! They''ve been looking for the last genie for centuries, they''re not gonna give up just because one of their guys got killed! I could tell them I''m still looking! I could give you information, I could--!¡±


    Kyle unleashed his power. It was almost as strong as the blast he''d fired the first night he''d fought the efreet, only this time it was centered directly on Danny''s head. A lance of pure glowing energy shot up into the sky, and Danny''s smoking corpse fell headless to the ground. Kyle landed a second afterwards, panting and sweating.


    ¡°Okay, uh...¡± Kyle shook his head. ¡°What the hell do we do now?¡±

 Chapter 24: Shades

    Sirens blared and vehicles he''d never seen before rolled up. They had sirens like police cars, but they were black SUV''S with some kind of shield like logo on the side. Dozens of them poured onto the street, and whenever one stopped the doors popped open and people in vests and ball caps carrying rifles poured out.


    ¡°Okay,¡± Kyle said, raising his hands. ¡°I guess now we get arrested.¡±


    That was kind of what happened. Only it didn''t quite go the way Kyle expected. The first part he was ready for. The agents with the guns rushed at him. He was pretty sure the guns couldn''t hurt him, in fact he was pretty sure he could blow up the whole street and take them all out, but he understood their position. Something really weird and violent had happened here, they were nervous. He was all set to let them pull him down and cuff him when a voice cut over the din.


    ¡°Wait!¡± Tanya shouted. ¡°He''s one of the good guys!¡±


    The agents hesitated, and a new voice came from within one of the SUVs.


    ¡°I''m going to need a little bit more than that, Ms. Myrden,¡± came the sultry purr, and a woman in a severe black suit stepped out of one of the cars in the back. Her skin was the color of burnt caramel, and her hair fell down her back in glossy waves. He was pretty sure she was beautiful, but it was like he was having trouble making out the details. The suit made her startling, but somehow also anonymous. ¡°This is a much bigger mess than usual.¡±


    The agents weren''t pointing their guns as threateningly, but they hadn''t exactly put them away either. They gestured for Kyle to walk in a direction and he did, meeting up with Jenny, Tanya, and Goldie. The only three members of their group who weren''t too injured to talk. Tanya was having her leg looked at by a medic, Goldie was leaning against a wall, and Jenny just looked confused.


    ¡°Kyle!¡± She said. ¡°Who are these people?¡±


    ¡°The men in black,¡± Goldie said. ¡°I should have figured. This is the part where we disappear.¡±


    ¡°That hasn''t been decided yet,¡± the agent woman said, walking over to the group.


    ¡°You''re not going to disappear me, Julia,¡± Tanya rolled her eyes. ¡°It would piss off my father, and you need him. So you''re not going to disappear any of my friends either.¡±


    ¡°That depends on how good the story is,¡± the agent crossed her arms.


    ¡°Who is this?¡± Jenny asked.


    ¡°This is Agent Julia Nunez,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Of...the agency doesn''t have an actual name. Most people just call them the Shades.¡±


    ¡°There are magical operatives working for the government?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°Of course there are,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Do you think you can keep magic a secret from something like a modern government? Every government has magical agents.¡±


    ¡°She doesn''t feel human,¡± Jenny said


    ¡°You''re one to talk,¡± Nunez grinned, and Kyle could see her teeth were pointed. Every single one of them. And the ones in front looked kind of like fangs. ¡°And Tanya''s right, we generally try to work with organizations like her family to keep things stable. Of course we don''t generally have magic battles blowing big burning holes in the middle of a town.¡±


    ¡°Self defense clause,¡± Tanya said. ¡°We''ll give a full report.¡±


    ¡°You bet you will,¡± Tanya said. ¡°All of you will. We''ve picked up Ms. Trent as well. I can''t wait to hear this one.¡±


    After that, it was like a magic trick.


    Everything landed on Danny, eventually. They tied him all the way back to the fight at the school, saying that was an early bomb that didn''t work right. He escaped from jail to retrieve his bomb-making materials, which he handled improperly causing the explosions and destruction in the neighborhood. Easy, neat, clean, believable, with no magic required to tell the story.


    And just like that, before your very eyes ladies and gentlemen, the magical occurrences in Rolling Hills have (poof!) disappeared.


    But before they, they had to explain things to Nunez and her team. After all, the magician needs to understand the trick even if nobody else does. Agents quickly set up tents all around the destroyed neighborhood, and Kyle was led to one and asked to tell his story. So he did.


    ¡°...and that''s when you all rolled in,¡± Kyle finished.


    ¡°Nothing else you want to add?¡± Nunex asked.


    ¡°Yes,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Can I go home now?¡±


    ¡°What makes you think you''re not under arrest?¡± Nunex asked.


    ¡°Is it worth your time to arrest me?¡± Kyle asked. ¡°Are you even positive you could?¡±


    ¡°Don''t get cocky,¡± Nunex said. ¡°You really think we can''t handle you?¡±


    He had worried, for a minute, that they might try to kill him and take Jenny. The last genie was a lot of power. But somehow he felt confident they wouldn''t. Nunez felt like some kind of predator, and he still wasn''t too clear on what she actually was, but he felt like he could handle it. At worst, he was sure he could bust his way out with Jenny before they could do anything to lock him down.


    He wasn''t sure where this confidence came from, but it was there. He didn''t feel stronger, exactly, but ever since Jenny wished him awake his power had seemed...firmer. Tighter. More his. He''d have to figure out what was going on with all that.


    Besides...


    ¡°I think you''re not sure if you can,¡± Kyle said. ¡°If you were sure you could arrest me, you already would. Or you would have rolled in and grabbed me and Danny at the same time. Because you were here before the fight started, weren''t you? You''re the reason we didn''t get mobbed by random civilians trying to figure out what was going on.¡±


    ¡°Not bad,¡± she smiled. ¡°You''re right. I''m not sure we could handle you. But really, don''t get too cocky. You''re powerful, kid, but I''ve seen stronger. At the agency, we''ve got stronger working for us.¡±


    ¡°Alright sure,¡± Kyle shrugged. ¡°But is a fight with me what you actually want?¡±


    ¡°No,¡± Nunez admitted. ¡°That would be loud. And we''re all about keeping things quiet. But that doesn''t let you off the hook completely.¡±


    A case of theft: this story is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.


    ¡°What do you mean?¡±


    ¡°I mean we''re going to be opening an office in Rolling Hills,¡± Nunez said. ¡°The Myrden family wasn''t enough to warrant it before, but now that you''re here? With the last genie? Not to mention all your little friends. This place has become a real magical hot spot. So the next time something like this comes up, your government will be here to help!¡±


    She gave him a fang filled grin.


    ¡°Isn''t that comforting?¡±


    After that, a little to Kyle''s surprise, they were free to go. Kyle stopped in to check on the others, the ones who hadn''t already been taken to the hospital, but he barely had the energy to talk to them. It had been a long, complicated day and he was dog tired. Nunez gave everyone a ride home...in fact, she insisted. Strongly. Kyle barely had time to wonder where his grandfather was, he stumbled into the house and fell asleep.


    At one in the morning, he woke up screaming.


    ¡°Kyle!¡± Jenny said, lying in the bed with him. ¡°Kyle! It''s okay. You''re okay.¡±


    ¡°Right,¡± Kyle said, blinking and taking in the world around him. ¡°Right. Okay.¡±


    It wasn''t so much of a surprise. He''d had a fight to the death today. He''d almost died. In his dream, he''d been on fire again. And Danny...


    And he was killing Danny again.


    Dammit. He''d hoped to be one of those heroes who was so pragmatic that kind of thing didn''t affect him. Apparently, his life wasn''t going to be that convenient.


    ¡°It''s okay,¡± Jenny said, wrapping her arms around him. His elbow fell between her breasts again. ¡°You just had a nightmare.¡±


    ¡°Yeah,¡± Kyle said. ¡°I guess so. I''m okay, Jenny. I''ll be alright.¡±


    ¡°Are you sure?¡± She asked, eyes sparkling in the darkness.


    And suddenly what he needed, desperately needed, was to be close to her. He needed to feel the way he had before, when they''d kissed. To feel that bright warm calm wrapped around him, to feel the tension ease away because someone he loved was close.


    He reached up to cup her chin and pulled her into the kiss. Her arms wrapped around him, and this time they didn''t pull apart. They had nowhere to be, and there was nothing in the world Kyle wanted to do more in this moment than stay exactly what he was. It was Jenny who pushed things farther, pulling away the sheet that separated them until their bodies were pressed together with nothing in between but the thin pants he''d worn to bed, but this time he didn''t stop her. She had more experience, after all, centuries of it. He decided to let her lead the way.


    The kiss didn''t break as she reached down his side, pulling his pants away. There was an awkward moment when neither of them wanted to break the kiss, but neither had the reach to pull his pants down any further. Kyle solved the problem by remembering the force he''d used to pull off Danny''s wings--


    And the memory was distant, unimportant now, so much less important than the woman in his arms


    --and he called upon the same power to slide his pants down without them having to pull apart. They were against each other with no obstructions now, his cock pressed hard against the skin of her inner thigh, but neither of them was in any hurry. They let their hands play across each others skin, letting the moment build, the heat boil inside them both, before Jenny moved her hips to press her lips against his head and take him inside of her.


    She broke the kiss as her lips thrust down, engulfing him to the base, the moment of penetration bringing a gasp to her lips she couldn''t contain. Kyle made a similar noise, his hips bucking inside her, reveling in a sensation he had only ever dreamed of before, warm and soft and tight around him. And from that feeling, a strange echo. As her hips began to move, and he instinctively tried to match her rhythm, the echo continued.


    It''s her, he realized. It''s coming from her.


    Connected as they were by the magic that had brought him back from the brink of death, he could sense what she was feeling through some shuddering vibration of the magic inside her. He let his focus pour into that echo, let it guide him to her every weak spot. She yelped in surprise as her inexperienced partner suddenly found her most sensitive places, moved inside her in ways even she wasn''t fully aware were keys to the deepest depths of her pleasure. But she rallied quickly, and slowly he began to lead the rhythm as their bodies rolled together.


    There were no complicated poses, no experimental contortions. Nothing beyond the two of them entwined, hands gliding across each other''s bodies to grope and caress, their hips rolling against each other in a pounding rhythm as they clung to each other. For a while there was nothing else in the universe but the two of them, and time lost all meaning, until at last it was punctuated by the clamping of Jenny''s walls along his shaft and her nails digging into his shoulder as she came to shuddering climax.


    For the first time, of many.


    Morning came, and Kyle found himself still in bed with a beautiful genie. She was snoring softly in the bed beside him. So it hadn''t been a dream. The bad parts or the good.


    Kyle leaned in to kiss her in her sleep. She woke up with a mumble.


    ¡°Hey,¡± she said softly.


    ¡°Hey,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Feel like getting up?¡±


    ¡°No,¡± Jenny said, covering her head with a pillow.


    ¡°You''re normally the one with all the energy,¡± he pointed out.


    ¡°Your fault.¡±


    ¡°How?¡±


    ¡°Colossal physical enhancement is exhausting,¡± she told him.


    ¡°Did I hurt you?¡± Kyle asked worried. ¡°I wasn''t really thinking about it, because, you know, but I thought I kept my strength under control...¡±


    ¡°No,¡± She said, poking her head out to give him a swift peck on the lips. ¡°You didn''t hurt me. It wasn''t the strength, it was the stamina. Not complaining, but I''m tired. Lemme sleep.¡±


    Kyle tried to stamp down his grin. He was not going to spend all day with an enormous stupid grin on his face because he''d worn his magical genie girlfriend out. That sounded like something from a porno, anyway. Still, he couldn''t deny it felt good.


    He rolled out of bed and pulled on a pair of sweatpants, heading downstairs to get breakfast. He found his Grandfather sitting at the kitchen table. His grandfather did have an enormous stupid grin on his face.


    Oh no.


    ¡°Morning,¡± he said.


    ¡°Morning,¡± his grandfather said, grin never slipping. Kyle tried to ignore him for a few minutes, but it was no good.


    ¡°Look-¡± Kyle started.


    ¡°Good going boy!¡± His grandfather laughed.


    ¡°Dammit!¡± Kyle slammed a fist on the counter. It left a dent.


    ¡°Careful there,¡± his grandfather said. ¡°You don''t want to knock the place down, do you?¡±


    ¡°I dunno,¡± Kyle said. ¡°I''m still considering.¡±


    ¡°Well looks like you''re doing fine,¡± the old man said. ¡°I was worried about you, but by the time those government vultures got done interrogating me you and the genie were already asleep.¡±


    ¡°That''s it?¡± Kyle said. ¡°You don''t want more explanation than that?¡±


    ¡°You''re a good kid,¡± the old man shrugged. ¡°I care that you''re okay. The rest of it? Not much I can do. Danny got his hands on something bad and you handled it. If you need to talk, I''m here.¡±


    ¡°Thanks grandad,¡± Kyle said, misting up a little bit.


    ¡°About anything,¡± the old man waggled his eyebrows. ¡°Anything at all. I got experience that could really come in handy, especially for a talented young amateur...¡±


    ¡°Aaaand now you''re ruining it,¡± Kyle sighed.


    ¡°G''mrning,¡± Jenny mumbled, walking into the room wearing an oversized shirt. ¡°Nuggets.¡±


    ¡°It''s first thing in the morning,¡± Kyle pointed out.


    ¡°Want nuggets,¡± Jenny yawned. ¡°Still all tired. Your fault.¡±


    ¡°No don''t say that!¡± Kyle wailed, but it was too late.


    ¡°Good on ya boy!¡± His grandfather laughed, punching the air. ¡°That''s my genetics in you right there! Good for you!¡±


    They were just sitting down to breakfast when the phone rang. Tanya. He picked it up to hear a surprising amount of noise going on at the other end.


    ¡°What''s up?¡± he asked.


    ¡°I''m getting everyone together to talk about yesterday,¡± Tanya said over the phone. ¡°Everyone. That includes Ammeline and Goldie, they need to be read in too. It''ll be easier if we explain everything all at once. When can you come over?¡±


    Kyle thought about it. School was over for the year, he didn''t have anything else to do. And besides, it sounded like everyone was having fun over there.


    ¡°Why so noisy?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°Goldie is berating Evan for cheating against her at chess,¡± Tanya sighed. ¡°Betty is rambling about something I don''t even understand but it sounds vaguely pornographic, Trevor is trying to figure out what she''s saying, and Ammeline is walking around declaring herself the real winner of the fight with Danny. Please, Kyle, you have to come help me with these people.¡±


    Kyle blinked.


    ¡°What did you say?¡±


    ¡°I said please come help,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°That''s the nicest you''ve ever spoken to me,¡± Kyle pointed out.


    ¡°Well if I can''t get rid of you people,¡± Tanya snapped. ¡°I may as well be polite. Alright? Don''t make a big thing out of it.¡±


    ¡°Yeah sure,¡± Kyle said. ¡°No problem. We''ll be there in a couple of minutes.¡±


    He hung up the phone.


    ¡°Who was that?¡± Jenny asked, her cheeks stuffed with nuggets like a squirrel.


    ¡°Tanya needs some help calming everyone down,¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°Yay!¡± Jenny punched the air. ¡°Friends!¡±


    ¡°Yeah,¡± Kyle said, smiling. What a weird, weird place his life had become. But also magical, in ways that had nothing to do with genie powers. ¡°Friends.¡±

 Chapter 25: Awakenings

    Kyle and Jenny yelped in surprised and dived out of the way as Evan and Ammeline came crashing through where they''d been standing moments before.


    They had just gotten to Tanya''s house and used the teleport to get down to the basement, appearing in the middle of an epic chase scene. Tanya was chasing Evan, and both of them had obviously taken physical enhancement. They danced off the walls like crazed ninjas.


    That was a weird thought. Had Kyle hit his head? Could he even get a concussion anymore?


    ¡°They''re gonna hurt themselves!¡± Jenny said.


    Right. Right. Time to focus. Evan and Ammeline were causing chaos.


    ¡°But it is!¡± Evan laughed over his shoulder. ¡°It is time to get a look at your nodes!¡±


    ¡°Stop saying it like that!¡± Ammeline shouted. ¡°If I could find my fencing sword I''d gut you like a fish!¡±


    Something rubbed against Kyle''s leg. When he looked down. Ammeline''s sword was there, cuddling up to him affectionately. It walked on four spindly legs, with ears near the tip of the blade and a tail sprouting from the handle.


    ¡°Hey there moonlight,¡± Kyle said. ¡°I''d pet you, but I think you might be sharp. Isn''t it uncomfortable being a blade?¡±


    ¡°Mrow,¡± the magical familiar agreed.


    ¡°Want me to take it for now?¡±


    The cat-sword seemed to consider for a moment, then Moonlight erupted from the sword like he was jumping out of a pool of water and landed in Kyle''s arms. Kyle caught him, and grabbed the now inanimate sword before it could hit the ground.


    ¡°You okay?¡± He asked Jenny.


    ¡°I''m fine!¡± Jenny said. ¡°Everyone seems really energetic.¡±


    The chase had moved further down into the catacombs now, so they made their way to the usual training room where he found the others. Betty, Tanya, Trevor...and Goldie.


    ¡°How''s it going?¡± Kyle asked. ¡°A little surprised to see you here.¡±


    ¡°I was a little surprised to see a cat turn into a sword,¡± Goldie said. ¡°Let''s call it even.¡±


    ¡°It''s going like you saw,¡± Tanya said. ¡°I asked Goldie to come by because she deserves an explanation after the incident with Danny. And now that she''s invovled too, she needs to know how to defend herself.¡±


    ¡°How big are these tunnels anyway?¡± Kyle asked. ¡°It feels like they go further than your property.¡±


    ¡°Technically we''re in an alternate dimension right now,¡± Tanya said.


    ¡°Of course we are,¡± Goldie sighed.


    ¡°Don''t ask me how it works,¡± Tanya ignored her. ¡°Spatial manipulation isn''t my specialty. It was my father who did that. But yes, they cover far more ground than the house does.¡±


    ¡°I am glad you have taken control of the sword,¡± Betty said. ¡°We all felt it was better she not have access to it when chasing Evan. And now Moonlight doesn''t need to keep track of it while the rest of us are training.¡±


    ¡°What about me?¡± Kyle said. ¡°I need to be training too.¡±


    ¡°Yes, I suppose you...¡± Betty squinted at him. ¡°You''ve had sex!¡±


    ¡°What!?¡± Kevin blanched.


    ¡°You and Jenny had sex last night!¡± Betty said definitely.


    ¡°You did?¡± Trevor looked over from where he''d been practicing his stances.


    ¡°How could you possibly know that?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°Regardless of my deductive process,¡± Betty said, ¡°I am correct. You and Jenny spent last night copulating.¡±


    ¡°Yes we did!¡± Jenny said proudly, raising a fist in the air triumphantly.


    ¡°Wait!¡± Kyle said. ¡°Hold on!¡±


    ¡°Wait you did?¡± Evan said, screeching to a halt in the doorway. ¡°No wait, you hadn''t before!?¡±


    Ammeline''s foot slammed into the side of Evan''s head and sent him flying down the hall. Ammeline replaced him in the doorway, adjusting her clothes as she walked into the room.


    ¡°Got him,¡± she said. ¡°And oh look, Kyle found my sword. What were we discussing?¡±


    ¡°Sex!¡± Jenny said happily.


    ¡°No we were not,¡± Tanya said, flushing a little. ¡°What Kyle and Jenny choose to do to each other...¡±


    ¡°To?¡± Betty pressed. ¡°What exactly are you picturing?¡±


    ¡°With!¡± Tanya said hurriedly. ¡°I meant with!¡±


    ¡°Ahahahaha,¡± Ammeline said, flushing herself and looking a little nervous. But she rallied after just a few seconds. ¡°Yes. Rivals we may be, but we are not competing in romance. I shall vanquish you in other ways. Academics. Athletics. And now, magical prowess!¡±


    ¡°She is literally a genie,¡± Evan said, rubbing his head as he walked into the training room. ¡°Damn, that actually hurt a little. We''re all still messed up from the big fight with Denny, remember?¡±


    ¡°Tanya has been explaining the circumstances,¡± Ammeline said. ¡°And the nature of our newfound magical abilities. I want you to know there''s no hard feelings for keeping the truth of events a secret. I wish I had come to you all sooner, but I didn''t anyone else had begun exhibiting powers. I should have known when you asked if anything strange was going on...but I was wrapped up in my own head.¡±


    ¡°It''s fine,¡± Kyle said. ¡°It''s been a complete mess. Is everyone doing okay?¡±


    ¡°I''m doing alright,¡± Trevor said. ¡°I got checked out by the EMTs. You know, the scary government EMTs.¡±


    ¡°Hey yeah!¡± Evan said. ¡°We''re part of the conspiracy now! That''s actually pretty cool.¡±


    ¡°The Spooks aside,¡± Tanya said, ¡°this kind of thing happens all the time. Well, this might have been a little more dramatic than normal. But there''s definitely going to be more trouble. Magic seems to attract it.¡±


    ¡°So we get ready,¡± Evan said. ¡°And that starts with...¡±


    Ammeline glared at him.


    ¡°...determining the nature and extent of Ammeline and Goldie''s reserves of mystical power,¡± Evan said. ¡°Why, what did you think I was going to say?¡±


    ¡°Nodes,¡± Ammeline said.


    ¡°Just the word nodes?¡±


    ¡°From you, it''s enough. Now, you''ve explained what nodes are to me, but how do I check them?¡±


    ¡°Over here,¡± Tanya said, guiding her towards the crystal on the wall. Ammeline put her hand on the crystal, and her constellation appeared glowing over the room.


    ¡°Large nodes,¡± Tanya said.


    ¡°YEAH they--¡± Ammeline slapped Evan on the back of the head with her free hand.


    ¡°Four of them,¡± Tanya continued. ¡°Very respectable. Looks like you''ve already assigned one to physical enhancement.¡±


    ¡°And one of them to energy emission,¡± Ammeline said. ¡°Right? From the explanation you gave me I must have.¡±


    ¡°Not quite,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Why not try it right now? Reach out a hand and try emitting energy.¡±


    ¡°You told me that was dangerous,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°She''s not doing it with a colossal node,¡± Tanya pointed out. ¡°And we''re in a room designed to take it. Besides, I''m sure I''m right.¡±


    Ammeline reached out a hand and focused. Nothing happened.


    ¡°It always works with my sword,¡± Ammeline said.


    ¡°Exactly,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Kyle, give her the sword.¡±


    Ammeline took the sword and thrust with it. A spiral of energy fired from the tip and crashed into the wall.


    ¡°Object enhancement,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Normally it takes decades of training with the kind of object you want to enhance, carefully honing your magic. But you seem to have a natural talent for it. Natural or wish-born, either way it doesn''t matter. And you''ve already spent years making a fencing sword in your hand part of your body. I think you''ll find that as long as you''re holding it, that sword is almost impossible to break.¡±


    Unauthorized duplication: this narrative has been taken without consent. Report sightings.


    ¡°I see,¡± Ammeline made another couple of thrusts, firing more spiraling attacks to splash against the far wall.


    ¡°More than that,¡± Tanya said, gesturing to the constellation that still hung over the room. ¡°Look very carefully. See those lines?¡±


    Kyle had to squint, but eventually he saw them. Three of Tanya''s nodes were connected by silvery threads to the fourth.


    ¡°That node the others are connected to would be the node you''ve assigned to object enhancement. All of your powers will be very much enhanced when you''re holding the sword, including your physical abilities. Combining nodes like this is a very advanced and risky technique. I shouldn''t even be surprised anymore.¡±


    ¡°And all this because of Kyle''s wish?¡± Ammeline said, squinting at the constellation of her own nodes.


    ¡°Or something like that,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°Don''t worry about it buddy,¡± Trevor said, flexing. ¡°You didn''t ask for this...¡±


    ¡°Yes I did,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Technically, I did. And the truth is...¡±


    He reached out and put an arm around Jenny''s waist.


    ¡°Now that I''ve got it I wouldn''t trade it for my old life. I''m sorry if that''s selfish, but...finding Jenny was just too amazing.¡±


    ¡°Awww!¡± Jenny said, resting her hand on Kyle''s shoulder.


    ¡°Don''t worry about,¡± Trevor pointed out. ¡°I already said. You know what I meant about not asking for it. And I''ll admit, getting to know everyone better has been pretty cool. Especially Betty.¡±


    ¡°I find the situation agreeable as well,¡± Betty said. ¡°Although unlike Kyle, Trevor has not yet let lust overcome him.¡±


    Ammeline looked from Trevor and Betty to Jenny and Kyle.


    ¡°We are not competing in romance!¡± She told Jenny firmly, turning away.


    ¡°I''m happy I''m dating Goldie now too,¡± Evan put in.


    ¡°Shut up,¡± Ammeline glared. ¡°For what it''s worth, I was quite pleased myself to discover I had gained super powers. That your wish was the likely method doesn''t matter one bit.¡±


    ¡°Is there any chance I have powers?¡± Goldie asked.


    ¡°We''ll find out now,¡± Tanya told her. ¡°Go ahead and put your hand on the crystal.¡±


    Goldie obliged, looking up at the constellation that appeared in front of her. Except it reminded Trevor more of an early morning sky. Mostly clear, with just a few tiny pinpricks of light.


    ¡°Three tiny nodes,¡± Tanya said. ¡°All inactive.¡±


    ¡°So....no magic,¡± Goldie said.


    ¡°Not necessarily,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Your nodes are inactive, but they''re there. You could train them. You might never be an archmage, but magic isn''t all about raw power. Don''t let these freaks confuse you, this is more potential power than most people have. Kyle, your turn.¡±


    ¡°We already did me,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°Yes but I want to see it again,¡± Tanya said. ¡°A lot happened in the fight with Danny.¡±


    ¡°Alright,¡± Kyle said, putting his hand on the crystal. The constellation appeared, but it had...changed.


    One colossal node now glowed a bright, bright purple. His smallest node, the eternal node, glowed a deep calming blue. There were odd connections snaking their way through half of his constellation, in patterns he couldn''t understand.


    ¡°That''s what I thought,¡± Tanya sighed. ¡°You bound a genie as your familiar and basically came back from the dead. That was bound to change things.¡±


    ¡°What does this mean?¡± Jenny asked. ¡°Is Kyle okay?¡±


    ¡°Probably,¡± Tanya shrugged. ¡°It doesn''t look like he''s in danger of hurting himself with his own nodes. But I have no idea how you should train now. This is way too complicated for me.¡±


    ¡°Well we''ve got time to figure it out right?¡± Kyle said. ¡°After all, we''re hopefully done with trouble like Danny O''Brien for a good long time.¡±


    Benny Gold, thanks to Danny''s bullet, had slept through all the chaos.


    He might have been surprised how many visitors he''d had while unconscious in the hospital. Many of them were former bullying victims, some people he''d never even interacted with before. He had no idea about magic, or what had happened with Danny, or anything that had occurred since he''d fallen into his dreamless slumber.


    Which was a big part of the reason it took so long for him to get his bearings when he woke up.


    He opened his eyes in an unfamiliar room. It took him a while to figure out it was a hospital room, but that was the easy part. Hospital rooms have a certain recognizable look, after all. The much harder part was figuring out why he was in a hospital room. That took a little bit longer. What had he been doing right before he passed out? What did he remember?


    Danny. Danny had a gun. Danny had gone nuts. From there it was pretty easy to take the next step. Danny O''Brien had shot him. As he reached up and felt the bandage on his head, probably in the head. Which explained just about everything he''d taken in so far.


    ¡°Danny O''Brien you absolute bastard,¡± Benny grumbled out loud.


    ¡°Ah now there I can''t be making comment,¡± an unfamiliar voice said. ¡°Didn''t know the man well enough to make a judgement, y''see. But as ye were one who knew him well, I''ve doubt at all yer absolutely right.¡±


    Benny turned his head to look at his visitor. The man sitting in the chair beside the bed had long, deep red hair tied in a ponytail underneath a wide brimmed black hat. The hat matched his long black coat. His limbs were long and thin, and his skin was pale. His face gave off the impression of an imp, or an elf, some kind of mischievous spirit, with twinkling green eyes and a hooked nose. He looked to be in his early twenties, but gave off the impression of being older.


    ¡°You''re not a doctor,¡± Benny said.


    ¡°Quite right!¡± The man said. ¡°Quite right at that! Can''t fault a man when he''s right, can ye? The name is Cromlaire. Taliesin Cromlaire. And it seems there''s nothing wrong with your brain at least, me boy. Always a worry, after a head wound like that. But seems to me you''re right is rain! I am indeed not a doctor by any stretch of the word.¡±


    ¡°Right,¡± Benny said. ¡°Right. Have we...we''ve never met before, right?¡±


    ¡°No,¡± Taliesin shook his head sadly. ¡°No I''m afraid we have not. A failure on my part, I''m sure. But we have an acquaintance in common, or at least we had half of one that I''m aware of. And it''s that I''ve come to ask about. It''s a bit impolite when you''ve just woken up, and all, but I''m afraid we do need to talk about Denny O''Niel.¡±


    ¡°Are you a cop?¡± Benny asked.


    Taliesin stared at him. For a second Benny was afraid the strange man was about to attack. Then he burst into laughter, loud, booming, gut-shaking laughter.


    ¡°A cop?¡± Taliesin cackled. ¡°He think I''m with the constabulary? Oh no me boy, no never that. I''ve got a heap of problems with laws and rules and suchlike. No you''ll not find me with badge and truncheon, perish the thought! No, this is more about where Danny O''Brien got his power. This is about Kalshadd.¡±


    ¡°Kala-who?¡± Benny asked.


    ¡°Another who used be in my employ,¡± Taliesin said. ¡°An efreet. Not the brightest bulb in the box, by any stretch, had a tendency to solve problems with fire and fists. But he did have an eye for talent, and I could trust him with a job. Which raises the question of why he spent so much tim in yer charming little town, when it wasn''t where he was meant to be going?¡±


    ¡°I don''t know,¡± Benny said. ¡°I don''t even really know what you''re talking about.¡±


    ¡°Now are ye telling me the truth there lad?¡± Taliesin said. ¡°Are ye? Because I''ve been hearing you were in close with Denny O''Brien. And for Danny to do all he did, he had to be in close with my man Kalshadd.¡±


    ¡°Are you...¡± Benny blinked. ¡°Did you give Danny the gun?¡±


    ¡°Now the question I need answered,¡± Taliesin ignored him, ¡°is why was Kalshadd here at all? And why would he partner up with a local tough to take out another young man? Kyle Anderman, that''s the name I was looking for. Would ye happen to know why he was so interested? I''ve got theories of me own, you understand, but it would be nice to have some conversation before I start breaking fingers. I wouldn''t want to start breaking fingers if I can avoid it, lad.¡±


    Taliesin caught Benny''s eye, and Benny did not doubt at all that while he did not want to break fingers, he certainly would break fingers, if he felt the situation called for it. He was sweating when he answered.


    ¡°I don''t know what you''re talking about,¡± Benny said. ¡°I saw Danny with the gun, and then after that...I don''t even know how long I''ve been out. I never heard of your friend.¡±


    Taliesin examined him like a bug under a magnifying glass, his face a mask. Then the strange man''s mouth split into a wide smile.


    ¡°Well, then, no sense in me hanging around here bothering your rest!¡± Taliesin said, clapping his hands together and standing up. ¡°I''ll leave ye to yer rest. I bet ye''ve friends and family be wanting to come in. Thank ye for yer time, Benny Gold. Get better soon, and keep yerself out of trouble''s way. It''s going to be staying in town y''see, trouble. I''d hate to see ya get trampled while it''s wondering around.¡±


    Taliesin left the room the. Benny never heard the door. But when he looked around, the strange and terrifying man was gone. Once he was sure that was true he lay back on the bed, his brain racing.


    Danny what the hell are you into? Benny thought. It occurred to him that the way his visitor had been talking, Danny might be dead. That was...a complicated thought. Had Danny gotten in with the mafia or something? Was that what that was? And he hadn''t been able to place the strange man''s accent. Foriegn gangs, or something?


    And for some reason, they were interested in Kyle Anderman.


    He was still trying to figure out what he should to do about that when his parents burst in, sobbing and hugging him, and he let himself take solace in family, even if he couldn''t get the eerie man''s smile out of his mind.


    Taliesin Cromlaire leaned back in a chair an ocean and half a continent away from the town of Rolling Hills and let out a long, slow sigh.


    ¡°That spell does take it out of ye doesn''t it?¡± He sighed. ¡°Never been a fan, meself. But I had to talk to someone in person, or as close to in person as ye can get through a spell.¡±


    ¡°So what is it?¡± a gravelly voice asked from the shadows. ¡°Did he find the lamp?¡±


    Taliesin looked around the room. His organization had thousands of members all over the world, but the only ones who truly mattered were all here in this room. He had gathered what he liked to refer to as a motley group. Other words could come to mind. Eclectic. Odd. Bizarre. Strange. For some of them, the best descriptor would be beautiful. For others, horrifying. Less than half of them were human, most of the humans were only half human. It was a weird little bunch he''d gathered, but when he looked at them the only thing Teliesin saw was bosom friends. And since he''d begun his crusade, comrades in arms.


    ¡°Don''t rightly know,¡± Taliesin said. ¡°He found something right enough, ye can be sure of that. But if it was the lamp...I can''t rightly tell ye. Sending images of meself isn''t going to do the job, friends. Someone''s going to have to go in person and see what it''s all about.¡±


    ¡°Who do we have in the area?¡± Grumbled something shaped like a small hill in the corner. And it was a grumble, low and slow and muttering. Whatever made that hulking shape in the darkness spoke with the slow inevitability of a mountain rising from the ground. Its eyes glowed red in the darkness too, perfect circles of glowing red light.


    ¡°We don''t have anyone,¡± a slender man complained. His clothes were woven from golden thread that matched his hair. ¡°No one as good as Kalshadd anyway. Our power base in America is...thin. And it''s not exactly a population center.¡±


    ¡°That''s because they''re too far from Uzbedi,¡± Complained someone from a chair in the corner, it''s back turned to the rest of them. ¡°And they''ve got that little Spook organization of theirs taking care of them. The Americans are far too soft and pampered.¡±


    ¡°And they shouldn''t be,¡± a figure in a hooded cloak said. ¡°They ought to be on our side. Their government isn''t any happier with Uzbedi than we...¡±


    ¡°Is this relevant?¡± Yet another asked in a bored voice. And then another complained, and so on. It was the way of families, they fought. But things needed doing, so Taliesin raised a hand. The room quieted down immediately.


    ¡°No lads, no,¡± Taliesin said. ¡°No another catspaw or minion simply won''t do. It''s got to be one of us. This is too important, and Kalshadd was too close to a trail. Question is who? I''d go meself, but when I move around people tend to notice.¡±


    That got a laugh from the other occupants in the room, strange shadows and glittering presences alike. It was true after all. If Taliesin Cromlaire were to switch continents, anyone with any magic at all would take notice. The Uzbedis would be the least of it.


    ¡°I''ll do it,¡± came a voice from the rafters, one that hadn''t spoken before. All eyes (and related appendages) turned up to look at a woman sitting on a wooden beam and leaning against a high window. ¡°It''s been a long time since I went back to the states! Besides, I''m bored. I don''t actually run much of the organization, isn''t this what all of you keep me around for?


    ¡°Now don''t be running yerself down lass!¡± Taliesin said. ¡°Yer a valuable companion! We''d keep ye around just for the company. But ye do have a point, this kind of thing is yer specialty...¡±


    ¡°So let me go!¡± she says. ¡°I''ll check out what that idiot was investigating, blow some stuff up, kill a few people, it''ll be great! And I bet it''ll really piss off the Uzbedis. Which is the whole point of everything, right?¡±

 Chapter 26: DUCK!

    It was late at night by the time Kyle and Jenny made their way home from Tanya''s house. Jenny was hanging off his arm, and he found it strange how awkward and nervous that still made him. They''d slept together, and even if they hadn''t he''d fought horrible monsters. Why should having a girl hanging off his arm still make him nervous? A girl who''d made it perfectly plain how much she enjoyed his company? It made no sense.


    But the nervousness came a close second to the warm sensation of having her near him, the heat of her body a small part of the tinkling light that washed through him where they touched. He realized he was smiling, a big stupid idiot grin that made him look like a complete dope, and he couldn''t bring himself to feel embarrassed.


    ¡°Do you think Tanya will figure out how to train you?¡± Jenny asked.


    ¡°No idea,¡± Kyle sighed. ¡°I don''t know how this stuff works. A couple of months ago I didn''t even think magic existed.¡±


    ¡°And now you''re using it to cheat when we have sex,¡± Jenny giggled.


    ¡°Excuse me!¡± Kyle said, in a mock offended tone. ¡°Cheat!?¡±


    ¡°Well you can literally feel what I''m feeling,¡± Jenny said. ¡°What else would you call it? Most guys have to guess that kind of thing. They can''t just psychically find a woman''s weak spots.¡±


    ¡°So that''s cheating against other guys,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°It''s cheating against me too,¡± Jenny said. ¡°How am I supposed to keep you guessing about how well you''re doing?¡±


    ¡°Is that a thing!?¡± Kyle asked, his alarm now only half joking. ¡°Is that really a thing girls do!?¡±


    ¡°Just one of many games your cheating makes impossible,¡± she said.


    ¡°Tell you what,¡± Kyle said. ¡°When I get you home, how about I show you what it looks like when I''m really cheating?¡±


    ¡°Excuse me,¡± Jenny said. ¡°Yesterday you still had your virginity. I know, I took it.¡±


    ¡°You were just complaining about all my unfair advantages,¡± Kyle said. ¡°I think that makes us even.¡±


    ¡°Oh really?¡± Jenny squinted at him. ¡°Tell you what. Once I get you home, I''ll show you what it looks like when I''m cheating, then we''ll see...¡±


    Kyle looked up in alarm when he saw the silhouette of a person in the streetlight. Not that Rolling Hills wasn''t a safe town, if anything people complained it was too boring and safe. Normally. After a knock down drag out fight with a crazed efreet mutant, Kyle wasn''t in the mood to leave things like that to chance. But the old man who''s face became clear in the light didn''t seem dangerous at all. He had no mustache but a fluffy white chin beard that stood out brightly against skin the deep dark color of coal tar. He had a big round nose, and brown eyes that shimmered with a friendly twinkle. He wore a suit and hat that were all a matching deep burgundy red color.


    The strangest thing about him was his cane. A long thin rod of brown wood, topped by a silver handle shaped like the head of a duck.


    ¡°Good evening,¡± the man said, tipping his hat


    ¡°Uh, evening sir,¡± Kyle said, nodding in response. ¡°Excuse us.¡±


    ¡°No matter no matter,¡± the old man said. ¡°It does an old man''s heart good to see a young couple walking arm and arm. Gives a man hope for the world.¡±


    ¡°What a nice thing to say!¡± Jenny said as they passed the old man. They were only a few paces past him when the old man spoke again.


    ¡°Of course it tears an old man''s heart out to see someone so gifted throwing his power around like a monkey with a sack of beans.¡±


    Kyle felt a sudden spike of danger and threw Jenny to the side, whirling around to face the threat. The old man was almost on him, bringing his cane down towards Kyle''s skull. Kyle crossed his arms and blocked it.


    The impact forced him to his knees.


    ¡°Good instincts,¡± the old man said. ¡°You protected the genie first.¡±


    ¡°Who are you?¡± Kyle demanded.


    ¡°I''m the one who''s attacking you, boy,¡± the old man laughed. ¡°Does anything else matter?¡±


    The tip of the old man''s shoe caught Kyle in the upper stomach and he stumbled back wheezing.


    ¡°What the hell was that?¡± Kyle choked. ¡°You didn''t even...that didn''t feel enhanced...¡±


    ¡°Typical,¡± the old man shook his head. ¡°You survive a few bullets and a couple of monster punches and you think you''re invincible. Well you''re not, boy! You''re not invincible, you''re not indestructible, and you''re not a god. You''re a human. I kicked you in the bottom of your sternum, boy. That''s the bone that connects all your ribs together in your front. Kick a human in the base of the sternum it''ll hurt like hell and knock the air out of you. You think just because a blow can''t break your skin it can''t mess you up? Case in point.¡±


    Kyle stood up and tried to lunge, but the man''s cane poked out and caught him in the throat. Kyle choked and took another step back.


    ¡°Close your throat and your brain starts to panic,¡± The old man shook his head. ¡°You could probably survive for hours without a breath, but your body is still a monkey with delusions of grandeur just like everybody else. Same instincts, same weaknesses. I''m disappointed, boy. An efreet isn''t an easy enemy, I expected more from you. The way things are going I''ll win without my nodes.¡±


    You could be reading stolen content. Head to Royal Road for the genuine story.


    ¡°Are you,¡± Kyle coughed, and tried again. ¡°Are you working with him? Are you here for the lamp?


    ¡°Let''s say I am,¡± The old man grinned. ¡°What the hell do you plan on doing about it, exactly?¡±


    ¡°Jenny get out of here!¡± Kyle said, charging for the suddenly very, very sinister old man with the fluffy white beard. The old man scoffed, raising his staff up high over his head. The glowing, transparent image of an enormous beast appeared from the top of it, wings spread wide, glaring down at him across it''s colossal bill.


    It was a duck.


    ¡°What?¡± Kyle sputtered, staring at the enormous duck and its disdainful expression. He only paused for half a second, but it was too much. The duck moved like lightning, leaning forward and pecking him in the skull with it''s bill. The impact forced Kyle to the ground, but the huge duck didn''t stop there. It pecked him over and over, hammering him into a crater in the dirt.


    ¡°Pathetic,¡± the old man said, as Kyle pulled himself up from the dirt.


    ¡°Kyle!¡± Jenny screamed, and he whirled around to see her being carried off by a flock of ducks. Real ducks, this time, but with oddly glowing eyes. Without hesitation Kyle bolted, leaving a cloud of dust and cracked stone as he poured all his power into his run and tackled Jenny out of the ducks and brought her back down to the ground.


    ¡°Behind you!¡± Jenny shouted, throwing up her arm sparkling with pinkish magical energy. Their attacker was inches behind Kyle, closing in. The familiar aura of Jenny''s illusion spells appeared around the old man''s eyes, but only for a moment. He shook it off and kicked Kyle in the chest, sending both him and Jenny flying.


    ¡°Do you have any idea how much stronger than me you are?¡± the old man said. ¡°The gap is almost ridiculous. But you have no idea how to use that power. And no matter how strong, an unskilled brute will fall to a skilled fighter, every time.¡±


    ¡°Who the hell are you?¡± Kyle damanded.


    ¡°Me?¡± The old man grinned. ¡°I am your worst nightmare. The storm of sorrows. Misfortune made flesh, looming above your life like the storm cloud that heralds the all consuming flood.¡±


    ¡°DAD!?¡±


    Tanya stood a little way down the street, staring wide eyed at the old man stand over Kyle and Jenny.


    ¡°Oh hey honey!¡± he said, his eyes turning bright. ¡°Are you alright? How have you been doing? Sorry I was gone so long this time.¡±


    ¡°Dad what the hell are you doing!?¡± She demanded.


    ¡°Just checking out the new guy,¡± he said. ¡°Just a teachable moment, that''s all.¡±


    ¡°Wait,¡± Kyle said, helping Jenny stand as he pulled himself to his feet. ¡°Wait. You''re Tanya''s dad? You''re Doctor Myrden?¡±


    ¡°People call me doctor,¡± Dr. Myrden said, wiping off the top of the duck-handle on his cane. ¡°But I prefer to think of myself as a quack.¡±


    ¡°Kyle just survived a magical duel!¡± Tanya said.


    ¡°Just barely,¡± Dr. Myrden said grimly. ¡°By the skin of his teeth. He has no idea how to use his power. Blessed with nodes like that and completely clueless.¡±


    ¡°I kind of wish Evan was here,¡± Jenny said wistfully.


    ¡°I don''t,¡± Kyle grimmaced. ¡°But sir, Doctor...what are you..¡±


    Without even looking in his direction Dr. Myrden stabbed out with his cane and a duck of crackling lightning caught Kyle in the chest.


    ¡°You''re not ready to teach yet honey,¡± Dr. Myrden said to Tanya, completely ignoring Kyle and Jenny. ¡°You''ve only got the most basic grasp of node mechanics, arcane theory, or even battle tactics really. You''ve been in a few low level scuffles, but this was bigger than I''d ever trained you for.¡±


    ¡°We won,¡± Tanya glared at her father.


    ¡°You did!¡± Dr. Myrden nodded. ¡°But a lot of that was luck. Your opponent was half a child, and didn''t have much better idea of how to use his powers than your friend does. Which would not have been the case if you''d fought him a day later, and the human and efreet memories had a chance to fully merge with each other. You almost died, boy.¡±


    He turned to Kyle so suddenly, Kyle flinched.


    ¡°You did die really,¡± the old man said. ¡°It took a genie wish to bring you back. And you!¡±


    ¡°Eep!¡± Jenny yelped as he pointed his cane at her.


    ¡°You have no idea how to use the powers you were born with! The Spooks showed me the video. Plus, you''re his familiar now. A genie familiar hasn''t been seen in thousands of years. You should be much, much more help in combat than you are. Your combined power should be enough to decide battles between empires. And you can''t even handle one old man.¡±


    ¡°I did my best,¡± Tanya said. ¡°And in case you didn''t notice, you weren''t here.¡±


    ¡°I suppose that''s fair, but...¡±


    ¡°Does anyone care that I''m getting my ass kick?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°I care!¡± Jenny said encouragingly. Then she shrieked and started batting at her hair to chase away the ghostly duck who had flown up and started pecking her.


    ¡°You''re an archmage!¡± Tanya said. ¡°Of course going up against you isn''t a fair fight!¡±


    ¡°Do you think he''ll never have to face an archmage?¡± Dr. Myrden asked. ¡°Do you think archmages by the hundreds won''t be after the last genie?¡±


    ¡°He''s right,¡± Kyle said, holding the struggling phantom duck in both hands. ¡°I mean I don''t think he''s being fair to you, Tanya, if it wasn''t for you I''d already be dead. But he''s right. We already know people are after the lamp. I was overconfident when we were talking during training. I guess...I dunno. I guess after getting all this power, I felt invincible.¡±


    ¡°That''s very common,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°It''s why most young magic users die. Overconfidence.¡±


    ¡°And not just that,¡± Kyle said. ¡°I don''t really want to fight, if I don''t have to. But I guess I have to, don''t I?¡±


    ¡°That or seal Jenny away,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°But it''s clear you''ll never do that. The love is coming off you in waves. It''s enough to make an old man jealous.¡±


    ¡°Kyle...¡± Jenny put his hand on her arm.


    ¡°We''ve already been over all that,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Even before we were together, I would never do that to her. It''s not a fair.¡±


    ¡°A lot of things in life aren''t fair,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°But you''ve made a choice. That choice comes with consequences. If you want to make it happen, you''ll have to come into your power. It''s going to take a god to survive what''s coming your way.¡±


    ¡°So I''ve got to become a god?¡± Kyle said, clenching his fists. ¡°How do I do that?¡±


    Dr. Myrden stared at him for a moment. Then he broke out into a deep, booming laugh.


    ¡°I like him!¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°Tanya honey, how come you let someone else get to him first?¡±


    ¡°Dad,¡± Tanya rolled her eyes.


    ¡°Is he going for Uzbedi marriage rules? Your grandmother was a second wife and she was very happy, just saying...¡±


    ¡°DAD!¡± Tanya snapped, stomping her feet.


    ¡°It can be done boy,¡± the old man ignored his daughter. ¡°You''ve got the raw power for it. Most people die trying, though.¡±


    ¡°Well it sounds like you''re offering to teach me,¡± Kyle said. ¡°And I''d be happy to take you up on it.¡±


    ¡°Excellent!¡± Dr. Myrden said, clapping his hand together. ¡°Well we might as well get started!¡±


    The ghostly duck in Kyle''s hands turned into a swirl of energy. Dr. Myrden jumped into the air and landed on the back of a newly formed ghost duck, this one the size of a buss. It leaned down with an open beak to swallow Kyle and Jenny hole. Within seconds they were floating in the center of the transparent bird as Dr. Myrden landed on its back.


    ¡°Dad wait!¡± Tanya said.


    ¡°I''ll be taking them to the cabin honey!¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°I already left some training materials for your other friends back at the house. Use the lesson plans I left behind, this shouldn''t take more than a couple of months.¡±


    ¡°A couple of months!?¡± Tanya said. ¡°But...¡±


    The enormous duck flapped its wings, taking off into the air, and within seconds it was a sparkling dot in the distance.


    ¡°....but we didn''t even get to have dinner,¡± Tanya sighed sadly.

 Chapter 27: Dont Mix Ducks and Dirty Thoughts

    Trevor and Betty walked to Tanya''s house together the next day.


    They walked...close. Not arm in arm, not touching, but...close.


    This was because Trevor had discovered Betty possessed exactly two modes. Either she was showing no obvious affection at all, or she was climbing all over him like a crazed wild animal.


    Not that the wild animal thing hadn''t been fun. But Trevor was also hesitant to let it go to far, which is why he''d gently put a stop to it the night before. Betty had just shrugged, and gone back to sitting a few inches from him on the couch. He''d known from the start that going out with Betty would be different, from going out with a normal girl. That''s kind of what he''d been counting on. But that meant he wasn''t exactly sure what to expect.


    Also, he wasn''t sure what a crazed Betty might be willing to do in public. He''d have to ask Kyle or Evan to be sure, but he had a sneaking suspicion the answer was ¡°anything.¡±


    ¡°Crawling all over,¡± Betty said.


    ¡°What?¡± Trevor came up short.


    ¡°Sorry, I said part of a thought out loud.¡± Betty gestured to the street ahead of them, where some utility people were digging up the ground. ¡°They are crawling all over the place.¡±


    ¡°The gas company people?¡±


    ¡°No,¡± Betty shook her head. ¡°The Shades.¡±


    Trevor looked at the utility people again. They did seem to have the same air as the guys in the black SUV''s who''d rolled into town to make the Danny incident go away. Had something else happened?


    ¡°Maybe we shouldn''t talk to them,¡± Trevor said.


    ¡°Excuse me!¡± Betty said, walking up to the disguised agents with her hand raised high in the air.


    ¡°Or, you know, never mind,¡± Trevor sighed with a soft smile.


    ¡°Well hello there,¡± the ¡°utility worker¡± said. ¡°Just some regularly scheduled maintenance, nothing to be concerned about.¡±


    ¡°No this is definitely some top secret magical government business,¡± Betty said. ¡°And as someone involved in the most recent magical altercation, it would be useful to know what the circumstances were.¡±


    A pained expression crossed the agent''s face.


    ¡°Well little lady I''m not sure what you''re talking about exactly,¡± he said. ¡°But it occurs to me that if this were some kind of government secret, somebody might want you not to talk about it in public like that.¡±


    ¡°Oh. Really?¡±


    ¡°Yes,¡± the agent forced a smile. ¡°It might make a lot of people''s day a lot harder if you did.¡±


    ¡°I suppose that makes sense,¡± Betty said thoughtfully. ¡°Is there a phone number I can call, or...¡±


    Trevor decided it was time to come to the man''s rescue. He walked up behind her, put an arm around her shoulder, and immediately made things worse.


    ¡°Is that a giant footprint?¡± Trevor sputtered. ¡°A giant duck footprint? Is there a giant duck running around here someplace?¡±


    ¡°Alright now you kids move along!¡± the agent''s voice was starting to break. ¡°We''ve got a lot of work to do!¡±


    ¡°I am also curious about the giant duck,¡± Betty said.


    ¡°No he''s right,¡± Trevor guided her away. ¡°Maybe Tanya will know what''s going on.¡±


    ¡°The duck is named Philbin,¡± Tanya sighed. ¡°He''s a summoned beast, just like Betty''s cat. And he belongs to my father.¡±


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    ¡°Your father is back?¡± Trevor said. ¡°I thought they were away on business.¡±


    ¡°He came back just long enough to scoop Jenny and Kyle and leave,¡± Tanya said.


    ¡°Why did he take Jenny and Kyle?¡± Betty asked. ¡°You''re his daughter, wouldn''t you be the more logical choice?¡±


    ¡°Not according to him,¡± Tanya said through thin, tight lips. ¡°He''s not wrong, I don''t have the experience to train Kyle myself. Not at his level of power. And I really don''t have any idea what''s going on with his constellation. He left lesson plans for everyone, including me. Training regimens we can follow while he''s away.¡±


    ¡°Are they very different from what we''ve been doing?¡± Trevor asked.


    ¡°Not for you,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Your powers are nice and simple. He wrote down a few explanations you might find more helpful than what I said. Here, Betty. I had you focusing on control, but he wants you to focus on elemental attunement.¡±


    ¡°I see,¡± Betty said, taking the folder Betty offered her and looking over the stack. ¡°But I do not understand. If each of these folders is a lesson plan, but Kyle and Jenny are being taught directly by your father, then there are too many of them.¡±


    ¡°One of them is for Goldie,¡± Tanya said. ¡°And one is for me.¡±


    ¡°Okay,¡± Trevor said. ¡°But while we''re doing this here, what are they up to...wherever they are?¡±


    ¡°We can only guess,¡± Tanya said.


    Kyle had a duck on his head.


    He sat cross-legged on the ground, hands in his lap, with Jenny doing the same across from him. Kyle was shirtless, Jenny was not, which Kyle considered was probably for the best. He didn''t need any more distractions.


    Because, you know. There was a freaking duck on his head.


    They were sitting in the most boring basement Kyle had ever seen, a simple cube of dirt with a big straw mat in the middle. Dr. Myrden stood over them with his arms crossed, the duck-hanlded cane tucked in his elbow. And there were ducks on their heads, glowing energy ducks the good doctor had conjured which were supposed to help them sense their internal energy.


    As far as Kyle could tell, he just had a freaking duck on his head.


    ¡°A genie is one of the most powerful individual beings in existence,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°So powerful that in the early days of the universe, their out of control power was bound, because rampaging genies threatened to destroy everything else that lived. That binding resulted in the mechanism of lamps and wishes. So despite their ability to manipulate the fabric of reality itsef, on their own they are capable of only minor magical manipulation.¡±


    ¡°We know all this,¡± Kyle said. Well most of it. Kyle was very curious about what had happened eons ago that had resulted in the genies getting their power bound. He wondered if Jenny knew?


    ¡°But Jenny is not alone,¡± Dr. Myrden ignored him. ¡°She is bound to you. In a very real way, there is no difference between her power and yours.¡±


    ¡°She''s in the room,¡± Kyle pointed out from under his duck.


    ¡°Yes but I''m talking to you,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°Because youare the one who needs to unlock the link between your powers. You must have felt the connection between your energies before. Focus on that.¡±


    Well he''d definitely done that at least once. He flushed as he remembered the feel of his hands on her skin, from both his senses and hers, how their minds had mingled while their bodies rolled together, his...


    ¡°QUACK!!!!!¡± The ducks on their heads pecked them both repeatedly in the face.


    ¡°Ahh ahh ahh!¡± Kyle said, smacking the duck away. Jenny yelped similarly, batting at the duck assaulting her own face. After a few minutes the pecking subsided.


    ¡°Why does that hurt me?¡± Kyle said. ¡°Bullets don''t even hurt me!¡±


    ¡°It''s a magic duck,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°It''s magic. What concerns me is why it happened. You were both thinking about something horny, weren''t you?¡±


    Kyle flushed again, catching Jenny''s eye. She was doing the same.


    ¡°Well stop it!¡± Dr. Myrden snapped. ¡°Yes, connections like that get particularly strong during sex. But that''s not the kind of connection we''re looking for, and it''s not reliable enough to use in combat. You do not unlock your powers through boinking. This isn''t a porno.¡±


    ¡°Nope!¡± Jenny said cheerfully. ¡°Our sex scenes are infrequent and narratively justified!¡±


    ¡°You formed a familiar bond with each other,¡± The old wizard said. ¡°Focus on that.¡±


    I was barely conscious though, Kyle thought. I was almost dead. I only noticed anything was happening when...


    When I heard Jenny''s voice, calling me back. And the sense of her was all around me.


    He focused on that. The first moment he noticed their mind''s touching. A moment both less sexual and more intimate than making love, sensual and warm and caring as two souls touched in a way that had nothing to do with bodies. And as he remembered he felt it again, not as strong but omnipresent, a swirling heat floating at the back of his mind.


    ¡°Oh!¡± Jenny said, perking up. ¡°Oh hey!¡±


    Kyle opened his eyes. Jenny''s body crackled with soft pink flames, like a fireplace burning low. She laughed, and began to hover a few inches above the ground.


    ¡°I''m levitating!¡± She said happily. ¡°I can levitate again!¡±


    ¡°There we go,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°By the time we''re done training you, you''ll be able to keep that link open all the time. Jenny should be able to use more of her powers now, even without a wish.¡±


    ¡°I mean I''ve already made my wishes,¡± Kyle shrugged. ¡°Probably how all of this started. Hey, will this help us learn what my wish was exactly?¡±


    ¡°No,¡± Dr. Myrden shook his head. ¡°No it won''t. But now we can start the real work.¡±


    ¡°What real work is that?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°First things first,¡± Dr. Myrden said, conjuring an enormous bird behind him. ¡°Fight my duck.¡±

 Chapter 28: Duck Duck Lose

    A lot of strange things had happened to Kyle since he found Jenny''s lamp in the antique shop, between efreet attacks and ghosts haunting the mall. Not to mention the things that were strange and new to him, like actually having a girlfriend, and Jenny''s casual and innocent promiscuity. He''d run out of ways to try and compare them all. How common was this magic stuff anyway? Was an efreet attack less common than Kyle getting a girlfriend? He bet there had been more efreet attacks than he''d had girlfriends. What about finding a genie in the first place? It was hard to measure it all on a scale.


    But he was pretty sure fighting a giant magical ghost duck for the second time in less than a day was pretty high up there.


    It dominated the training space, towering over him and Jenny in the basement training room.


    ¡°Feel free to go at full power,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°This room can take it. It''s sturdier than it looks.¡±


    ¡°It doesn''t look big enough for us to go all out,¡± Kyle said.


    The old man clapped his hands and the walls of the basement spread out, disappearing into the distance until they might as well have been standing in an open field.


    ¡°Well never mind I guess,¡± Kyle sighed.


    ¡°Come on don''t be so down!¡± The old wizard laughed. ¡°It should be easier this time. Now you''re just battling waterfowl, and not an old man with a cane too.¡±


    ¡°You''re trying to annoy me,¡± Kyle said. ¡°But I''ve seen enough anime to appreciate a training arc.¡±


    ¡°I haven''t but I get you''re trying to help!¡± Jenny said cheerfully. ¡°Plus I wanna see how much power I can use now!¡±


    ¡°Well good,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°Philbin could use the exercise.¡±


    ¡°His name is Philbin?¡± Kyle asked, staring up at the duck looming above him.


    ¡°Focus,¡± Dr. Myrden warned, just before Philbin pecked Kyle into the dirt. ¡°Or that''ll happen. Well it''s too late now, but maybe it''s too early for you to fight my duck. Maybe I should have started you off with the hamster.¡±


    Evan had memorized the training notes from Dr. Myrden in less than a minute. He loved his mental enhancement, it had so many uses. He was kind of disappointed he didn''t get to go off and train with the mysterious old man, it was kind of a childhood dream, but he''d only just started this whole magical adventure thing, and Kyle had gotten there first. There would be time for that. Magic had opened up a whole new world of opportunities.


    One of which was sitting cross legged next to him, trying to focus on her small latent nodes. Evan didn''t even have the urge to make a dirty joke about the word nodes right now, that was how thoughtful he was being. He''d really matured since this whole thing had started. Although now that it had occurred to him...


    Heh, he thought. Nodes.


    Okay, so he hadn''t matured that much. Still.


    ¡°How''s it going?¡± He asked Goldie.


    ¡°I have....no idea,¡± Goldie said. ¡°I mean learning magic sounded fun, at first, but this is...pretty frustrating. Especially when I''m looking at that.¡±


    She gestured across the room to where Ammeline and Trevor were in the middle of a sparring session. Trevor''s body was wrapped in a glowing suit of armor, while Ammeline danced around him like a humming bird, darting in and pecking him with her rapier every time she ducked under his guard.


    ¡°Yeah,¡± he sighed. ¡°It''s pretty intimidating.¡±


    ¡°You were backflipping off the ceiling yesterday,¡± she grumbled. ¡°Don''t give me that.¡±


    ¡°No seriously,¡± Evan said. ¡°Think about it. I can backflip off the ceiling, and I''ve got the super mind thing, but it''s a little weak compared to everyone else. For now. I''ll work on it. And weall got our powers from Kyle''s wish...probably. I''m almost certain of it. And I do have an enhanced brain, so I''m super smart.¡±


    ¡°Tanya keeps saying that''s not how your powers actually work,¡± Goldie pointed out.


    ¡°Yeah but what does she know? Her brain isn''t nearly as enhanced as mine.¡±


    Goldie gave him a weak smile.


    ¡°But my point is we''re all cheating,¡± Evan shrugged. ¡°Tanya complains about it all the time. When you do learn magic, you''ll have done it the hard way. The right way. You''ll have a better foundation than an of us.¡±


    ¡°Thanks,¡± Goldie said. ¡°That actually helps.¡±


    ¡°I stole it all from anime and kung fu movies,¡± Evan laughed. ¡°But speeches like that get put in all that stuff for a reason.¡±


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    ¡°Mmm,¡± Goldie said, closing her eyes and putting her hands together. There was a spark and a flash of golden light between her palms. ¡°Ah! Hey! I did it! Look! I did it!¡±


    ¡°Good!¡± Evan said. ¡°You know what that was, don''t you?¡±


    ¡°Really weird and kind of tingly,¡± Goldie said, shaking out her hands.


    ¡°No no no,¡± Even shook her hands. ¡°Obviously it was true love.¡±


    ¡°Oh really,¡± Goldie rolled her eyes.


    ¡°Definitely. We should make out.¡±


    ¡°Never,¡± Goldie said.


    ¡°Never?¡± Evan raised an eyebrow.


    ¡°Well...¡± she looked at him. ¡°No yeah, definitely never.¡±


    Evan smiled, but before he could think of a comeback Tanya''s shadow fell over the both of them.


    ¡°Was that a spark of power?¡± She asked.


    ¡°YEAH it was!¡± Evan leered.


    ¡°Don''t say it like that!¡± Goldie glared at him. ¡°Hold on, let me see if I can do it again.¡±


    He held her palms together, and a few moments later there was another spark of golden light.


    ¡°Alright!¡± Tanya said. ¡°Good. Now I''d say...well, check my father''s training plan but when I was learning, the next step was to try and hold that spark steady between my hands for as long as I could.¡±


    ¡°Let me check,¡± Goldie leaned over and looked at the pages of Dr. Myrden''s training plan. ¡°Yeah, yeah that looks like what it says here.¡±


    ¡°Good,¡± Tanya said. ¡°That''s....good. Do that.¡±


    Betty''s training instructions were similar to what Tanya had her doing, but more focused.


    Her training regimen said that, before anything else, she should link all of her nodes to the central node. It also came with instructions on how to do that, most visualization and meditation. Both of which she was either very good at or very terrible at that. She could visualize the power inside of her alright, and move it around, but her mind kept wandering.


    Unusually for her, it wandered to Tanya. Even more unusually for her, it wandered to how Tanya might be feeling.


    ¡°Mrow,¡± Moonlight called up from her lap.


    ¡°Are you sure I should?¡± Betty asked. ¡°I am not normally considered the correct person for a heart to heart talk.¡±


    ¡°Mrow.¡±


    ¡°Jenny is better suited for this kind of...¡±


    ¡°MROW!¡±


    ¡°That is true, Jenny is not here. Alright.¡±


    Moonlight hopped off her lap and Betty stood up, walking over to where Tanya was looking through her own training plan.


    ¡°What''s up?¡± Tanya asked. ¡°Need help with something?¡±


    ¡°I was intending to ask you the very same question,¡± Betty said.


    ¡°I''m fine,¡± Tanya said. ¡°It''s...it''s stupid.¡±


    Betty stared at her for a second. Then another second. Then a moment, then for a second again, then for too long.


    ¡°Uhm...¡± Tanya said looking up again. ¡°Yes?¡±


    ¡°I am very bad at this kind of conversation,¡± Betty said. ¡°But it seems to me you need to have one, and all of our other friends are otherwise engaged.¡±


    Now it was Tanya''s turn to stare at Betty for a second, but to minimize awkwardness she left it there.


    ¡°Goldie just manifested magical energy,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Less than three hours after I handed her my dad''s lesson plan.¡±


    ¡°Is that not good news?¡± Betty asked.


    ¡°I mean it''s amazing,¡± Tanya laughed. ¡°Of course it is. But he just...he''s so much better at this than I am. But he wasn''t here when you all awakened your powers, you know? He''s never here. And then he just shows up for ten minutes, beats up Kyle, drops all this advice I really could have used over the past couple of months and then he leaves!¡± Tanya threw her hands up in frustration. ¡°He just...just leaves again!¡±


    Betty cocked her head thoughtfully to the side.


    ¡°Once again I am very bad at this kind of conversation,¡± Betty said. ¡°But it seems to me that you are most focused on the fact that he left.


    Tanya glared at her for a moment, but then her face softened.


    ¡°I''m bad at this kind of conversation too,¡± Tanya sighed. ¡°You''re right. I''m a lot more upset that he came back for ten minutes and then just left again.¡±


    ¡°Is there any reason we could not go to where he is?¡± Betty asked.


    ¡°What do you mean?¡± Tanya said.


    ¡°It seems to me the logical next step is to tell your father how you feel,¡± Betty said, looking over at Evan and Goldie laughing together as she tried to control her magic. ¡°I have recently been given ample evidence that failing to express your feelings in a timely manner has noticeable consequences, even if it did work out quite well for me in the end. And, no offense, it seems like we could all use training from your father directly. You as well. Does it not make sense then for us to go where your father is?¡±


    Tanya stared at her for a second.


    ¡°You know what?¡± Tanya shot out of her chair. ¡°You''re right!¡± She stormed over to a cabinet and came out with a large wooden duck.


    ¡°Hey everybody!¡± Tanya called out, waving the wooden duck above her head. ¡°I''ve just decided we need a field trip. Make any arrangements you need to to explain to your family''s why you''re away for a couple of days. If I have to I''ll get the spooks to help out. But we''re about to take a flight up north.¡±


    ¡°A plane?¡± Trevor asked, letting his armor fade.


    ¡°Don''t be ridiculous,¡± Tanya said. ¡°We''re going by duck.¡±


    Meanwhile, Kyle was having duck issues of his own.


    Jenny had started out the fight showing off her new powers. She could fly now, and toss bolts of magical power around like tennis balls. At first Kyle had thought Jenny being so powered up would make the fight easy. But Philbin the Giant Magical Duck¡ªnot something he would have ever thought would become a significant factor in his life¡ªhad shrugged off the bolts like...ugh. Like water off a duck''s back.


    His world was turning into duck metaphors, and he was hating himself for it.


    Kyle had a little more luck with his super strength. He could punch the duck around, at least, that was something. But nothing he''d done had been able to put the enormous bird down, and he''d been slapped around by it''s wings dozens of times and pecked with it''s huge bill more times than he could count.


    ¡°So is this where we''re stuck forever?¡± Kyle asked, catching the huge duck''s enormous bill in both hands to fend it off. ¡°Stalemated with your giant duck forever?¡±


    ¡°Is that what you think?¡± The old wizard arched an eyebrow. ¡°Stalemated, are we? Don''t be ridiculous, boy. You''re losing.¡±


    Kyle punched the duck away.


    ¡°Doesn''t look like it to me,¡± he said.


    ¡°Then try this,¡± Dr. Myrden said. The massive duck stood up again...and charged towards Jenny. Her bolts bounced off it ineffectually as it barreled down on her. Kyle shoulder tackled it away. The duck stood up...and charged at Jenny again.


    And again. And again.


    For the next hour the duck did nothing but try and attack Jenny, and Kyle did nothing but try and stop it. It went on for so long he wasn''t read when the Duck turned around, it''s eyes glowing with light. Its enormous bill opened up and a beam of energy fired from it''s mouth.


    Kyle stopped, the entire world seeming to go distant and still. Jenny''s panicked scream sounded like it was coming from a million miles away.


    Huh, Kyle thought. I didn''t know it could do that.


    And then he fell to the ground, clutching a bleeding hole through his stomach that Jenny could see daylight through.

 Chapter 29: Duck And Cover

    Jenny ran to Kyle''s side as he fell, or tried to. Dr. Myrden was suddenly there, holding her back.


    ¡°What are you doing!?¡± She screamed. ¡°You killed him!¡±


    ¡°That''s very possible,¡± Dr. Myrden admitted. ¡°But I don''t think so.¡±


    ¡°Please you have to let me heal him!¡±


    ¡°You already did.¡±


    ¡°I...what?¡±


    The confusion made Jenny stop for a moment, and really look at Kyle on the ground. There was still a hole in his stomach she could see floor through, but it wasn''t bleeding. In fact there wasn''t nearly as much blood as she thought their ought to be for a wound that size. And if she looked carefully...was it starting to close? It was! It took a little staring, like watching paint dry, but there was definite progress being made as his body knitted itself back together.


    ¡°What the hell is that?¡± Jenny asked.


    ¡°It''s the healing spell you cast on him,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°Back when he almost got cooked by the O''Brien kid.¡±


    ¡°But...then...how is it still going?¡± Jenny asked. ¡°And does it hurt?¡±


    ¡°Oh I''m sure it hurts like hell!¡± Dr. Myrden laughed. ¡°You might have figured this out by now, but this is what I had planned from the beginning. This is going to be extremely important to both of your training.¡±


    ¡°I mean okay,¡± Jenny said. ¡°I''m relieved he''s alright, but shouldn''t we do something.¡±


    ¡°Good idea!¡± the old wizard nodded. ¡°Let''s get some lunch. It''s going to take him hours to heal from all that.


    ¡°Will he be safe here?¡± Jenny asked.


    ¡°I''ve protected this whole area with various kinds of magic,¡± Dr. Myrden waved his hand. ¡°There''s dangerous stuff here, but I control it. Anyone trying to get in from the outside is in for a rude awakening.¡±


    ¡°This one of my father''s giant magical ducks,¡± Tanya said, gesturing to the enormous, semi-translucent green tinted waterfowl. ¡°His name is Corby.¡±


    ¡°Quak!¡± the duck said, greeting them with a wing raised in salute.


    ¡°It occurs to me that our lives may have become strange,¡± Ammeline said.


    ¡°Do you think so?¡± Betty cocked her head.


    ¡°Well get used to it,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Stuff like this happens all the time. Anyway! My father and Kyle are training at our cabin property upstate. It''s difficult to find without magic, but I''m a member of the family. I''m linked to the place. Corbin can fly us all straight there, and then we''ll...¡±


    Tanya hesitated. Then she''d have an argument with her father, probably. But for the moment they just had to focus on getting there.


    ¡°...get training from my father directly,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Like we should have from the beginning.¡±


    There was a pause then, the entire group just staring in silence.


    ¡°Did I say something wrong?¡± Tanya asked.


    ¡°No!¡± Trevor said. ¡°No, it''s not you, it''s just...¡±


    ¡°I think we were all instinctively waiting for Jenny to say something,¡± Evan said.


    ¡°Yes this is normally when she would interject with a ¡°Yaaaay camping.¡± The cheer sounded extremely odd in Betty''s monotone voice.


    ¡°I thought the same,¡± Goldie said. ¡°I''ve mostly interacted with her only in normal world social settings, but none of us have her easy, innocent exuberance.¡±


    ¡°Our whole group dynamic is off,¡± Trevor said.


    ¡°I don''t know her too well but that can happen,¡± Goldie nodded. ¡°The flow of conversation organizes itself around a few big personalities, and when one of them isn''t around the conversation gets stilted and weird.¡±


    ¡°Are you saying we can''t talk right without Jenny around?¡± Goldie said.


    ¡°I think it is more that her frequent enthusiastic interjections helped to break up tense or otherwise uncomfortable moments, and also helped bring points of excitement to conversations which had gotten boring,¡± Betty said, adjusting her glasses. ¡°We had come to subconsciously we rely on her to prevent dialogue from becoming...¡±


    ¡°Enough character theory!¡± Tanya snapped. ¡°We''ll be meeting up with Jenny when we get there, so everything should sort itself out then right? Okay? Good. Now everybody get on the duck! You''ve all made arrangements with your parents for the trip, right?¡±


    ¡°Those last two sentences were in the wrong order,¡± Goldie pointed out. ¡°But yes.¡±


    ¡°Alright good,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Now on the duck!¡±


    Kyle sat up, shaking his head to clear it.


    Did I just get special beam cannoned by a duck?


    His chest said no, his shirt said yes. There were two huge holes on the front and back of his shirt, in the same place over his stomach. Hist stomach, on the other had, was fine. Better than fine. Chiseled. No, better than chiseled. Sculpted. Damn, how had he gotten abs like that?


    Oh right, magic. It had taken magic. Colossal physical node. But enough being impressed with his own newly magnificent body, what the hell....


    ¡°Hey!¡± Jenny said. ¡°You''re awake!¡±


    She ran up to him smiling. Her words were a little muffled, because her mouth was full of food. There was a smear of some kind of orange sauce on the side of her lips.


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    ¡°Are you...eating a crunch wrap?¡±


    ¡°Mm?¡± She looked at the wrap in her hand. ¡°Oh yeah! Dr. Myrden made them from scratch, he''s a really good cook! Well not from scratch apparently, these are store bought tortillas...¡±


    ¡°Did I just get a hole shot through me by a giant duck?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°Well yeah!¡± Jenny smiled. ¡°I mean not just, it was a couple of hours ago, but yeah that''s what happened.¡±


    ¡°So I got a laser put through me and you....decided....to go have crunch wraps.¡±


    ¡°But you''re fine!¡± Jenny said. ¡°We left you healing, Dr. Myrden said you''d be okay.¡±


    ¡°Okay,¡± Kyle said, thinking over the situation. ¡°Listen, I don''t know how different the girlfriend thing is after all those thousands of years, but...¡±


    ¡°Here is your crunch wrap,¡± Jenny said, pulling it out of her pocket and handing it to him. ¡°There''s more in the kitchen.¡±


    ¡°Thank you. Now let me eat this and let''s find Dr. Myrden and make him tell us what the hell just happened to me.¡±


    ¡°We are approaching the camp!¡± Tanya called back.


    ¡°Riding a duck is fun,¡± Betty said. ¡°Weeeee.¡±


    ¡°Hey Betty?¡± Trevor cut in ¡°I appreciate what you''re doing here, but..."


    ¡°The imbalance among us caused by the lack of Jenny''s energy needs to be corrected,¡± Betty said.


    ¡°Yes but we need your energy,¡± Trevor said, reaching out to put a hand on her arm.


    ¡°And besides!¡± Evan said, sliding up next to them. ¡°It''s like getting really, really creepy.¡±


    ¡°Now I should be able to cross the magical defenses into the grounds,¡± Tanya said. ¡°But let''s get ready for some turbulence.¡±


    ¡°Do we what,¡± Goldie asked. ¡°Hold onto a feather?¡±


    ¡°Actually this trip has been surprisingly luxurious,¡± Ammeline said, reclining on the giant duck''s back. ¡°I assume some magic of the duck prevents us from falling off or freezing to death.¡±


    ¡°Something like that,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Now quiet, we''re approaching the perimeter. The guardian should be contacting us at any moment.¡±


    To everyone else riding on the duck, it looked like they were flying up to another ordinary stretch of forest. At least until the guardian appeared. First there was a glowing orb of light, that grew into a gleaming oval. From within the oval a cloud of feathers flew out like heavy snow, washing past them all as their mount hovered in the air. Then, within the glowing light of the oval, the silhouette of a woman. As the light behind her faded, they were able to fully behold her winged form.


    Her skin was golden, not tanned or bronzed but truly golden, as if she had been covered in gleaming gold paint. Her eyes were a pure, glistening blue. She was beautiful in a way no mortal could achieve, from her slim arrogant face to her slender, curving figure, to the golden threads of her hair to the glistening crystal-white of her wings. She wore a crown, and carried a golden staff.


    Both of them topped with ducks. Her headdress was an enormous beak, her staff was topped with...a rubber bath toy duck. It was molded from gold, and the eyes and outlines of the wings were gemstones, but it was still clearly a rubber duck.


    ¡°My name is Quakfina,¡± she intoned.


    ¡°No it isn''t!¡± Evan shouted angrily.


    ¡°It is good to see you again Tanya,¡± Quakfina ignored him. ¡°But I''m afraid your father has closed the training grounds for now. He came with a powerful young man, and a woman of ancient race. Their training will be both rigorous and dangerous.¡±


    ¡°Hi Quakfina,¡± Tanya said.


    ¡°We''re just going to be cosigning this Quakfina thing!?¡± Evan sputtered. ¡°We''re just gonna...¡±


    He quieted as Trevor put a hand over his mouth and wrestled him down.


    ¡°I really, really need to talk to my father,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Just let us through. The password is ¡°with a feather on his back,¡± alright?¡±


    Evan screamed furiously into Trevor''s hand.


    ¡°I am sorry,¡± Quakfina bowed slightly. ¡°Your father has forbidden it. And you bring with you many strangers.¡±


    ¡°These are my friends,¡± Tanya said.


    ¡°Awwww,¡± Betty said robotically. ¡°We are. I knew it.¡±


    ¡°Seriously Betty,¡± Trevor said. ¡°Stop.¡±


    ¡°The words were Jenny''s but the sentiment was mine.¡±


    ¡°It is good to see you have so many friends now,¡± Quakfina said with a small smile. ¡°But the ancient pact remains. Your father has ordered the training grounds be closed to all, yourself included. Perhaps he foresaw this. But I am bound to deny you passage.¡±


    ¡°Are we ever going to discuss the sudden duck infestation?¡± Goldie asked.


    ¡°MMMMPH!¡± Evna said, pointing excitedly at Goldie.


    ¡°You know what?¡± Tanya ignored them, stepping up on Corbin''s head. ¡°I''m sorry, Quakfina, but that''s not good enough. Not good enough at all. Because I''m a part of the pact too. And I''m getting kind of sick of my father and his crap. And I need, I really really need, to go tell him that. And to do that I need to get past you. So as a descendant of the line of Myrden, blood tied to the Pact of the Old Goddess, I hereby demand that you let us through, by the power of your oaths.¡±


    ¡°My oaths are to the head of the family,¡± Quakfina said. ¡°That is not a position you hold. Not yet. One day you will, and on that day you may make demands of me. Until then, watch your tone. I consider you a friend as well, Tanya. More than that, since I have known you from the day you were born. But that does not give you the right to command me. I am still a being come down from the heavens, handmaiden of the goddess B....¡±


    She stopped, her eyes glowing softly.


    ¡°Our argument will have to be put on hold for now, Tanya,¡± Quakfina said. ¡°Your words have activated a spell left behind by your father. It seems he foresaw this as well. I am to allow you all in...provided each of you pass a test.¡±


    ¡°A test!?¡± Tanya glared.


    ¡°You came here for training, did you not?¡±


    ¡°Wait did we actually say that out loud?¡± Trevor asked.


    ¡°She''s a goddess or an angel or something,¡± Goldie hissed back to him. ¡°Who knows what she knows? God, my life has gotten weird. All I did was agree to a date with this asshole.¡±


    She gestured towards Evan.


    ¡°I should let him up,¡± Trevor said. ¡°He''s a lot calmer now.¡±


    ¡°No I like him like this,¡± Goldie said.


    ¡°Alright fine,¡± Tanya sighed. ¡°Go ahead. Give us your stupid tests.¡±


    ¡°Very well!¡± Quakfina spread her wings wide, her rubber duck staff high in the air. ¡°I shall present you each with challenges, and you will decide who shall face each one! We begin with...the Storm of Wings!¡±


    ¡°It''s gonna be fucking ducks isn''t it!?¡± Evan snarled, ripping himself out of Trevor''s grip.


    "Wait," Betty said. "Do you mean it will be "fucking" ducks merely for emphasis, or do you mean we will literally be having intercourse with..."


    "There see?" Trevor smiled. "That''s your energy. We need that."


    Evan was right. The first way, with the emphasis. From behind Quakfina flew a swarm of quaking, flapping ducks. Swarm was too tame a word. A horde. A plague. A catastrophe. A solid wave of ducks, that washed over them and the giant duck they rode on. All of them sputtered and coughed as feathers filled their mouths, trying to bat the ducks away. But however many they knocked aside there were more, in a never ending tide.


    ¡°Okay,¡± Trevor sputtered between mouthfuls of duck. ¡°This is less than ideal.¡±


    ¡°Evan was right!¡± Goldie said, smacking ducks aside with both hands. ¡°This duck thing is getting ridiculous!¡±


    ¡°Right!¡± Evan shouted. ¡°Right!?¡±


    Evan and Trevor, with their powerful physical enhancement nodes, were doing the best against the swarm of ducks. But there was only so much they could do against the unceasing horde.


    ¡°We''re being pushed back!¡± Tanya said, knocking the ducks away with conjured vines.


    ¡°How far back must we be pushed before we fail the test?¡± Betty asked. She was curled up underneath Moonlight, who had grown to his enormous blue tiger mode and was batting ducks away with the claws.


    ¡°I don''t know she didn''t tell me the rules!¡± Tanya said.


    ¡°Then the rules must be ignored!¡± Ammeline shouted. ¡°Stand aside, and witness the rise of a heroine!¡±


    Suddenly, the tide of ducks thinned...and then stopped.


    Ammeline was standing on Corbin''s beak, rapier out, thrusting so fast her arm and the blade had become a blur. Every duck she pierced exploded in a flash of light and a burst of feathers. Now that the flow had slowed, they realized the ducks were coming in an extremely tight formation up until they reached Corbin''s bill, when they spread out to engulf everyone. By attacking the point right before they split up, Ammeline had been able to slow the tide.


    ¡°Are you a goddess?¡± Ammeline demanded of the giant glowing woman. ¡°Are you an angel? It doesn''t matter! I am Ammeline Trent, true American princess! I will outshine the heavens! I will outshine the stars! And if a goddess stands in my path I will outshine the gods! Witness my flashing blade in awe, duck woman, as I reduce your test to nothing! Ahahahahahahahahahahahaha!¡±

 Chapter 30: Duck Soup

    The tide of ducks slowed and finally ceased in the face of Ammeline''s flashing rapier., and as soon as the wave of ducks ended Ammeline disappeared in a flash of light, reappearing moments later floating in the air behind Quakfina.


    ¡°Hey! This is cheating! Did I shine so brightly to allow me to secure my victory would have blinded you, you....duck...angel...goddess...thing. What are you exactly? Regardless, you can''t just...¡±


    ¡°You won,¡± Quakfina said.


    ¡°I what?¡± Ammeline blinked.


    ¡°You won. You defeat the challenge of the Storm of Wings, through dexterous skill and quick thinking. You will float here until the rest of your friends pass their own challenges, or fail them.¡±


    ¡°Oh.¡± Ammeline said. ¡°Well yes. Of course. Of course I won. Ahahahaha. Do you hear that everyone? You only need to be half as magnificent as me, and we''ll be on our way to Kyle and Jenny in a minute or two!¡±


    ¡°Interesting,¡± Betty said. ¡°Ammeline''s skills were truly the perfect ones to face that test.¡±


    ¡°Yes of course,¡± Quakfina said. ¡°I am conjuring tests to challenge each of you.¡±


    ¡°Then why not tell us who each test is for?¡± Trevor asked.


    ¡°Because determining that is part of the test,¡± Quakfina said. ¡°The next test is the Cube of Corners. You may all work on the answer, though only the person who actually solves it will be granted the victory.¡±


    She waved her hand and an enormous sphere appeared in the air between her and the group riding the enormous duck. By this point none of them were surprised that the sphere was a solid mass of ducks.


    ¡°Wait,¡± Evan said. ¡°I thought this was Cube of Corners. That is a sphere. It doesn''t have any corners.¡±


    ¡°That''s the puzzle, obviously,¡± Tanya said, squinting at the sphere. ¡°Somehow we need to turn it into a cube. Maybe it needs some kind of magic to make it...¡±


    ¡°THAT DUCK!¡± Evan and Goldie said at the same time, both pointing at the same duck in the upper right area of the sphere. They looked at each other and glared.


    ¡°I saw it first!¡± Evan said.


    ¡°You did not!¡± Goldie snapped back. ¡°Besides, I''m the one who figured it out without a magically enhanced brain!¡±


    ¡°What are either of you talking about?¡± Trevor asked, his arm around Betty''s waist.


    ¡°It''s a packing puzzle,¡± Evan said. ¡°The trick is to find the way the shapes fit within the new box...in this case, an imaginary cube around the sphere.¡±


    ¡°The ducks are all different shapes,¡± Goldie continued. ¡°See? The way they hold their wings, the way their beaks are pointed, the number of visible feathers, they''re all different. So there''s only one possible combination that makes a sphere, and only one possible combination that makes a cube.¡±


    ¡°And the only duck that isn''t blocked from moving is that one,¡± Evan pointed back to the duck they had been discussing. ¡°So that must be the duck you have to move first.¡±


    ¡°A rapid beginning,¡± Quakfina said. ¡°But seeing a possible first move does not count as solving the puzzle.¡±


    Evan and Goldie glared at each other.


    ¡°That one next!¡± they both pointed, speaking in perfect unison. ¡°Tuck it''s wing under the beak of the first one to make the corner! Then the one down and to the right is loose! Pull it out and use the tail too....¡±


    Fifteen minutes later, a cube of ducks had appeared in the air before them. Evan and Goldie were both panting, still speaking in unison.


    ¡°Turn the last duck upside down,¡± they wheezed. ¡°DONE!¡±


    They both fell back against the duck, panting and wheezing.


    ¡°I win,¡± Evan said.


    ¡°Like hell!¡± Goldie snapped. ¡°I just did that without any powers!¡±


    ¡°Slower than me.¡±


    ¡°By like a couple of seconds!¡±


    ¡°She said whoever actually solves the puzzle. I did. So....¡±


    ¡°I''m gonna break your god damn face you smug little--!¡±


    In a flash of light, they both disappeared and reappeared floating behind Quakfina.


    ¡°Ties are possible,¡± the mystical duck woman said.


    ¡°Screw that!¡± Goldie shouted. ¡°I still won!¡±


    ¡°Yes you did,¡± Quakfina nodded. ¡°And so did.¡±


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    ¡°I''ll pluck you like a Christmas turkey,¡± Goldie growled.


    ¡°Your friends are very violent,¡± Quakfina turned to Tanya.


    ¡°I''m feeling pretty violent myself,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Do we have to continue playing these games?¡±


    ¡°You could try matching me power for power,¡± Quakfina arched an elegant eyebrow.


    ¡°I already know that''s pointless,¡± Tanya grumbled. ¡°Just send out the next test.¡±


    ¡°Very well!¡± Quakfina said. ¡°The next test you will face is the Path to Glory.¡±


    ¡°Which we can assume will be duck related,¡± Betty said.


    ¡°Yes of course,¡± Quakfina said with a bow. ¡°This one is much more direct. All you need to do is walk the path and get past me.¡±


    ¡°Didn''t you and Tanya just agree none of us could beat you in a straight fight?¡± Trevor asked.


    ¡°I will not attempt to stop you,¡± Quakfina said. ¡°They path will do that.¡±


    She waved her hands and spread her wings, and from the light of her feathers flew five huge ducks. One red, one blue, one brown, one gray, one white with sparkling feathers.


    ¡°Flying will not be allowed,¡± Quakfina said. ¡°You must walk the path and step on every stone.¡±


    ¡°Every duck,¡± Betty said.


    ¡°Well yes,¡± Quakfina said. ¡°For the purpose of this test, ducks are stones.¡±


    ¡°So we just jump from duck to duck?¡± Trevor said.


    ¡°That is the idea.¡±


    ¡°I think this is me then,¡± Trevor said. ¡°I think I''m the only one with the physical abilities to make the jumps. Are you gonna be okay?¡±


    ¡°I will be fine,¡± Betty said. ¡°I did not become helpless because we started dating. And while your desire to protect ¡°your woman¡± is laudible, seeing as you have not even yet let lust overcome you...¡±


    ¡°Alright alright,¡± Trevor smiled, kissing her on the forehead. ¡°I get it. My fault. I''m sure you''ll smash whatever your test is. I''ll be waiting for you.¡±


    Trevor turned and took a running jump off Corbin the Giant Duck and towards the slightly less gigantic ducks hovering in a stepping stone pattern up to Quakfina. His foot landed on the red one first, and it exploded into flame.


    ¡°Crap!¡± Trevor said, jumping off and landing on the brown one nest. Thorny vines exploded from it, lashing at his legs and ankles. He let out a pained shout and jumped across to the white one, which exploded in a storm of razor blades. Again he jumped, bleeding from cuts on his legs, to the blue duck. He braced himself for another attack.


    Splash.


    He didn''t land on the blue duck, he fell through it like it was the surface of the water. The duck''s outline exploded like a ball of water, then reformed. Trevor, on the other hand, started plummeting towards the ground.


    Corbin dived and swerved to catch him, landing with a thud on the giant duck''s back.


    ¡°That sucked,¡± Trevor groaned, laying his head in Betty''s lap.


    ¡°Is my lap so uncomfortable? I had thought my thighs were quite pleasantly...¡±


    ¡°No this part is pretty good,¡± Trevor said. ¡°I was talking about getting cut and burned by magical ducks and almost falling to my death.¡±


    ¡°Oh yes, that makes sense.¡±


    ¡°I think this one is for you, Tanya,¡± Trevor said. ¡°That''s way too much magic for me.¡±


    ¡°I mean possibly,¡± Tanya said thoughtfully, looking up at the ascending pathway of magical ducks. ¡°I''m pretty much limited to the nature and ice elements, right now. If this is a test for me it might be about expanding my elemental control....¡±


    ¡°No not nature,¡± Betty said. ¡°Wood. That duck is made of wood. Trevor, I am going to need my thighs back. Although alternate methods of placing your head between them can be discussed at a later date, should lust overcome you.¡±


    ¡°I''ll keep that in mind,¡± Trevor said, sitting up and letting Tanya stand. She summoned Moonlight, who erupted into his tiger form.


    ¡°Wood, Metal, Water, Fire, Earth,¡± Betty said. ¡°The five elements of classical eastern alchemy, just like my five elements cat. This test is for me.¡±


    Betty climbed on Moonlight''s back and jumped. He turned red as he landed on the red duck, and no flames attacked him. Brown for the brown, blue for the blue, etc, until she had leaped up the entire ascending stairs of ducks and leaped past Quakfina. In a flash of light, she joined the others hovering behind the mystical duck woman.


    ¡°Well that wasn''t so bad,¡± Trevor said, getting up. His legs were still bleeding, but not too badly. ¡°I guess the next test is for your or me, right?¡±


    ¡°It would have to be,¡± Tanya said.


    ¡°Well let''s see what we''ve got.¡±


    ¡°Champion of the Waters,¡± Quakfina said, waving her hand. What appeared in front of them was...


    ¡°Okay this is getting ridiculous!¡± Trevor said, as the enormous muscular man with a wrestler''s build and the head of a duck appear, standing on the back of Corbin with them. The duck raised a gigantic fist. ¡°What is it with the ducks?¡±


    ¡°The duck is a powerful and ancient totem!¡± Tanya said, a little defensively.


    Trevor pulled his fist back and punched the duck man in the beak. The duck reeled backwards, but replied with a swinging fist. Trevor caught the duck man''s wrist and pulled, twisting his hip, until the duck man was forced to the ground and completely immobilized.


    ¡°.....This was meant to be a test of physical strength,¡± Quakfina said slowly. ¡°But I was sure the guardian I had summoned was....¡±


    ¡°You forgot to factor in his martial arts training,¡± Tanya said. ¡°You were thinking in terms of testing everyone''s magical abilities. But Trevor was a good fighter before he had any powers.¡±


    ¡°I suppose you''re right,¡± Quakfina said. ¡°But that wasn''t all I was testing. Trevor, of course, passes.¡±


    Trevor disappeared in a flash of light and appeared behind the goddess. Only when he arrived there did he realize the others were having a whispered conversation.


    ¡°...isn''t she the one keeping us in the air?¡± Evan said.


    ¡°Corbin can cath us!¡± Ammeline said. ¡°And I''ve had quite enough of this duck woman. I say we do it.¡±


    ¡°There is a certain interesting element to the plan, but...¡±


    ¡°What are we talking about?¡± Trevor hissed to the others.


    ¡°Attacking Quakfeathers or whatever her name is from behind if she decides not to let us through,¡± Goldie said.


    ¡°That sounds like a bad idea,¡± Trevor said slowly.


    ¡°We''ve come through too much by this point to let her screw us over!¡± Ammeline said defiantly. ¡°And I''m worried she won''t play fair with Tanya. Doesn''t this look like the kind of thing which could all turn out to be a cruel joke?¡±


    Trevor thought it over. She wasn''t wrong, he could see it going that way.


    ¡°Alright,¡± he said. ¡°What''s the plan?¡±


    Unaware of the conversation going on behind the mystical duck woman, Tanya stepped forward on Corbin''s back.


    ¡°So alright,¡± Tanya said. ¡°My turn.¡±


    ¡°Yes!¡± Quakfina said, spreading her wings. Holy light glowed from her feathers and her eyes as the rose above, glaring down at Tanya. ¡°Your test...is already passed.¡±


    ¡°W...what?¡± Tanya stammered. ¡°When? How?¡±


    ¡°Your test was to stand up to me in the first place,¡± Quakfina smiled down at Tanya. ¡°Merely by demanding the tests, you have already passed. You are not wrong that you need to have a discussion with your father. By the ancient pact, I was forced to test your friends. But the shape of the tests was up to me. So I let them each show their ability. But you...your father does not know what he needs to do with you, although he thinks he does. Go. Challenge him. Your friends are strong. Trust them to...¡±


    ¡°GET HER!¡± Ammeline shouted, and the floating crowd of them tackled Quakfina from behind. The duck woman''s eyes widened in shock, her power faded, and she along with all the others who had passed their tests plummeted out of the sky.

 Chapter 31: Low Flying Duck

    ¡°This was unwise,¡± Quakfina said calmly as they all plummeted towards the ground. ¡°Your desire to save your friend was more than commendable, but she was in no danger.¡±


    The humans were mostly screaming, except for Betty, who was a stoic plummeting to the ground below as she was...pretty much every other time.


    ¡°Are none of you capable of flying under your own power?¡± Quakfina said.


    ¡°I do not believe so,¡± Betty said. ¡°Though I do consider it likely Trevor will survive the fall, given what I''ve seen of his physical enhancements. Possibly Ammeline and Eric as well.¡±


    ¡°She''s right!¡± Eric said, blinking. ¡°Me and Trevor can definitely handle the fall!¡±


    ¡°Oh good for you!¡± Goldie shrieked. ¡°But in case you forgot, I don''t have any fucking powers!¡±


    ¡°Technically not true,¡± Betty pointed out. ¡°You successfully conjured a magical effect just a short while ago.¡±


    ¡°Yes great!¡± Goldie snapped. ¡°I''m sure my ability to conjure a crappy magical flashlight will get me out of this!¡±


    ¡°We''ll cover you,¡± Trevor said. ¡°Eric, grab Goldie. I''ll take Betty and Ammeline. We''ll try to break your fall as much as possible.¡±


    ¡°No one needs to grab me,¡± Ammeline said. ¡°I believe I can break my own fall with my sword.¡±


    ¡°Okay good,¡± Trevor reached out to grab Betty as best he could in the air, cradling him to his chest.


    ¡°I am surprised you have not yet flown away of your own power,¡± Betty said to Quakfina. ¡°You can certainly fly under your own power.¡±


    ¡°The magics required to conjure the tests cost a great deal,¡± Quakfina said. ¡°I was more weakened than I appeared, and my magics were imbalanced. As the guardian of this place, I am more vulnerable to such things than a mortal would be, or than I would be otherwise.¡±


    ¡°Can you survive the fall?¡± Goldie asked, from where she clung to Eric.


    ¡°Oh no not at all,¡± Quakfina said. ¡°My strengths are mystical, not physical. When I hit the ground I will die, unless something is done.¡±


    ¡°Come over here,¡± Trevor said. ¡°I can probably carry you too....¡±


    ¡°I don''t think that would work,¡± Quakfina said. ¡°The chances of you cushioning the fall for one person are slim enough. No, I have two chances at survival. The first is for my powers to recover before we strike the ground, at which point I could save all of us. But that seems very, very unlikely.¡±


    ¡°What is your second option?¡± Betty asked.


    ¡°This,¡± Quakfina said. Her outline began to shimmer and blur until she was nothing more than mist, and then she faded away.


    ¡°Oh,¡± Eric said. ¡°Yeah that''s cool, you can just bounce. That''s fine sure.¡±


    ¡°Where did she go?¡± Trevor wondered out loud.


    ¡°I dunno back to whatever freaking rubber duck dimension she came from,¡± Eric said. ¡°The great soapy rubber bathtub in the sky. I''m pretty sure Tanya''s entire family is drinking the water from there anyway.¡±


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    ¡°Now that you mention it,¡± Ammeline said, ¡°where is Tanya?¡±


    With a loud triumphant quack Corbin swooped down, catching the falling crowd a few feet above the ground. They slammed down on a soft bed of downy feathers, falling apart in a chaotic pile.


    ¡°Where''s Quakfina?¡± Tanya asked.


    ¡°Back in her duck dimension,¡± Betty said.


    ¡°She doesn''t actually have a duck dimension, she''s an angel of the goddess...¡±


    ¡°She was an angel!?¡± Eric sputtered. ¡°An actual angel!?¡±


    ¡°You already knew there were genies and demons,¡± Tanya pointed out. ¡°Anyway, is everyone alright?¡±


    ¡°We''re all okay,¡± Trevor said.


    ¡°Good,¡± Tanya said. ¡°It''s time to go see my father.¡±


    In the training room beneath the cabin, Kyle was meditating again. He''d done an awful lot of that. The problem, at least according to Dr. Myrden, was that Kyle didn''t really have much control of his power. Kyle thought he was probably right. But that meant they were doing a lot of training that was...


    Well, frankly, boring. And he missed everybody else.


    ¡°Wait,¡± Dr. Myrden said.


    ¡°What?¡± Kyle asked, opening one eye.


    ¡°The guardian is gone. An angel I formed a pact with. She''s supposed to keep intruders out of this land.¡±


    ¡°So someone''s coming,¡± Kyle said, getting to his feet.


    ¡°Someone powerful enough to defeat a powerful being of the light,¡± Dr. Myrden said seriously. ¡°Come on. And call your genie. Back me up, but if I tell you to run, you run. Understood?¡±


    ¡°Understood,¡± Kyle nodded, getting up to follow him out. He waved Jenny over, and the three of them walked out into the grassy field around the humble looking wooden cabin that hid the training rooms. They were greeted to the sight of a humongous glowing duck gliding in for a landing on the grass below.


    ¡°Wait,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Isn''t that...¡±


    ¡°That''s not my familiar,¡± Dr. Myrden shook his head. ¡°That''s a different spectral duck I summoned and bound to a token. Who could possibly have that?¡±


    The duck landed, and the whole crowd poured off his back.


    ¡°Hey!¡± Jenny said cheerfully. ¡°It''s everybody!¡±


    ¡°Hello!¡± Betty waved, walking to catch up with Kyle. The others came quickly behind her, all except for Tanya.


    ¡°What are you guys doing here?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°Theoretically we are here for advice on training,¡± Betty explained. ¡°But I also believe we are caught up in the climax of some old family drama.¡±


    ¡°Yeah I picked up on that,¡± Kyle said, as Tanya stormed up to her father.


    ¡°What are you doing here?¡± Dr. Myrden demanded. ¡°How did you banish Quakfina?¡±


    ¡°It was a group effort,¡± Tanya said. ¡°I want to know what you''re doing here.¡±


    ¡°I left you notes...¡±


    ¡°Screw your notes!¡± Tanya snapped. ¡°You''ve been gone for over a year. And then you show up, don''t even come visit me at home, grab one of my friends and fly off?¡±


    ¡°I know I''m away a lot,¡± Dr. Myrden said, ¡°but my work is important.¡±


    ¡°Training Kyle is that important?¡±


    ¡°Yes,¡± Dr. Myrden said seriously. ¡°I don''t think anyone realizes just how powerful he is. Anyone. I have no idea what he wished for, but...he''s become something incredible. Something ridiculous, Tanya.¡±


    ¡°Yeah but,¡± Tanya blushed a little. ¡°He''s not gonna abuse it. He''s a good guy.¡±


    ¡°He doesn''t have to abuse it to be dangerous,¡± Dr. Myrden told her. ¡°If he doesn''t know what he''s doing, someday he''s going to level a continent by accident. That''s the scale of power we''re talking about here.¡±


    ¡°You know something about that?¡± Tanya glared. ¡°None of it freaking matters. Because you could have spent one night, dad. You could have taken one night to come and see your daughter. I know what you do is important. But you didn''t think about me at all. And I know the world isn''t ending right now, because if it was, you wouldn''t be out here playing games with Kyle.¡±


    Dr. Myrden stared at her.


    ¡°You might be right...¡±


    ¡°I know I am,¡± Tanya glared.


    Dr. Myrden''s stare continued, long and hard.


    ¡°You''ve never talked to me like that in your entire life,¡± he said.


    ¡°I figured it was time I started.¡±


    ¡°You''re not wrong,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°Why''d you bring the others? Moral support?¡±


    ¡°No,¡± Tanya sighed. ¡°They need training too. And you''d be better at running it than me. And if I don''t train I''ll fall behind. So I really do want you to train everybody. But for me it was mostly the other thing.¡±


    ¡°Yeah fair enough,¡± Dr. Myrden said, wrapping an arm around Tanya''s shoulders and pulling her close. Her eyes went wide, but she leaned into her father''s chest. ¡°Alright everybody! In case any of you haven''t figured it out yet, I''m Dr. Myrden, Tanya''s father. And she''s gone ahead and told me you all need serious training of your abilities. So lets have a little group meeting, and then I suppose we can get started.¡±

 Chapter 32: Nesting Ducks

    ¡°Okay!¡± Dr. Myrden said, clapping his hands together and looking over the assembled crowd. ¡°Looks like I''m going to have to completely change my training strategy. But before we do that, how long have you all been traveling?¡±


    ¡°Forever on that giant duck,¡± Evan groaned.


    ¡°In that case everyone rest,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°We can start training for real tomorrow. For tonight...I think this is a good opportunity for a campfire.¡±


    ¡°Make curry!¡± Jenny said excitedly.


    ¡°I dunno if...¡± Kyle began, but Jenny cut him off.


    ¡°Like on all those anime we watched!¡± Jenny stared up at him with wide, sparkling eyes.


    ¡°But...¡± Kyle started. ¡°But we...none of us...¡±


    Jenny just stood there and sparkled.


    ¡°Don''t think I don''t know you''re doing this on purpose,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°I have no idea what you mean.¡±


    ¡°Are you using your magic to make your eyes extra sparkly?¡±


    ¡°Maybe.¡±


    ¡°Ugh, fine. Hey, everybody...who''s up for an anime style curry cookout?¡±


    ¡°I''m fine with it,¡± Travis shrugged. ¡°I almost crashed into a grease puddle on the ground earlier, so just about anything is fine with me today.¡±


    ¡°I have never tried cooking curry,¡± Ammeline said. ¡°But my culinary talents know no bounds! Follow me, and I will help you all produce a curry worthy of the greatest restaurants in the world!¡±


    ¡°Are you really a good cook?¡± Jenny asked, with wide eyes.


    ¡°A family like yours doesn''t have a chef?¡± Eric asked, through slitted eyes.


    ¡°Only for special occasions!¡± Ammeline said proudly. ¡°I have honed the art of cooking to...an...art form! Ahahahahahaha!¡±


    ¡°Amazing,¡± Goldie shook her head. ¡°She just powered right through and went for it.¡±


    ¡°Don''t you have a cook?¡± Eric asked. ¡°You''re rich too, right?¡±


    ¡°Not that kind of rich,¡± Goldie said. ¡°But we do eat out a lot.¡±


    ¡°Excuse me,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°This is my cabin. Isn''t anyone going to ask me about the food plans?¡±


    ¡°Do you have an enormous pot!?¡± Jenny asked hopefully, her eyes sparkling.


    ¡°The young man is right you are definitely using magic to make your eyes extra sparkly,¡± Dr. Myrden sighed. ¡°But fine. I''m going to go get started on your training plans for the morning, I''ve got several more people to plan for now. Tanya knows where everything is.¡±


    ¡°But you''re going to eat with us,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Right?¡±


    ¡°Of course. You''d come and curse me if I didn''t.¡±


    ¡°Alright,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Trevor, come help me with the pans.¡±


    ¡°Why me?¡± Trevor asked.


    ¡°Because you have the most super strength out of everyone here.¡±


    ¡°Oh,¡± Trevor nodded. ¡°I suppose that''s true.¡±


    Betty reached out and put her hand on Trevor''s shoulder.


    ¡°Trevor,¡± she said. ¡°I know our relationship is in its early stages, but I do believe I would be upset should you be getting cooking materials with Tanya and had lust overcome you.¡±


    Enjoying this book? Seek out the original to ensure the author gets credit.


    ¡°What?¡± Trevor blinked at her.


    ¡°It is certainly similar to situations I have seen in a great many stories. She may be too short to reach a pot or pan on a high shelf, so you will come to help her, your chest pressing against your back and your genitals...¡±


    ¡°What are you...no!¡± Trevor said. ¡°I am not going back there to have some kind of porno meetup with Tanya!¡±


    ¡°And what if lust should overcome her?¡± Betty asked. ¡°You will be close together, and your genitals...¡±


    ¡°Stop talking about my genitals!¡±


    ¡°But I enjoy the topic,¡± Betty said. ¡°You have very impressive genitals. I am fond of them.¡±


    ¡°You haven''t even seen my genitals!¡±


    ¡°I have seen the bulge they form in your athletic pants on multiple occasions. It was not the only or primary reason I agreed to go to the dance with you, but honesty compels me to admit it was a factor. You will be alone with Tanya, and in such close proximity to you genitals...¡±


    Trevor grabbed Betty''s shoulder and pulled her in for a kiss. The rest of the camp, who had ignored the conversation as Betty''s usual off kilter blithering, stopped and stared. The kiss lasted for a long, long time. When they finally broke apart, Betty was flushed and breathless, more color in her cheeks than the rest of them had ever seen.


    ¡°Get this straight,¡± Trevor said. ¡°I''m dating you, okay? You. I''m not going to lose control and grab Tanya. Tanya isn''t going to lose control and grab me. Because she''s your friend, and I''m your boyfriend, and I have no intention of letting lust overcome me with anyone but you. Alright? So don''t worry about it.¡±


    ¡°Oh,¡± Betty said. ¡°Yes. Okay. I believe I understand.¡±


    ¡°Good,¡± Trevor said, giving her another peck on the cheek. ¡°I''ll be right back with the pots and things.¡±


    Trevor and Tanya walked off into the cabin.


    ¡°I am feeling unwell,¡± Betty said. ¡°Light headed. I am going to sit down...¡±


    Betty sat down on a log and drifted off into some fantasy land of her own. Eric, meanwhile, turned his attention to Kyle.


    ¡°You!¡± Evan said, running up to him. ¡°Weren''t content being lovey dovey back in town? Had to go off to a secret love next in the woods?¡±


    ¡°Your heart wasn''t in that one,¡± Kyle sighed.


    ¡°Nah it wasn''t,¡± Evan admitted with a grin. ¡°Good to see you again, buddy.¡±


    ¡°Good to see you too,¡± Kyle said. ¡°I guess we should get a campfire started? Those of us with super strength, I mean.¡±


    ¡°Anime curry cookout!¡± Jenny cheered, leaping into the air with her arms raised.


    A short while later, there was a campfire flickering in a pit they''d put together under Ammeline''s instruction. To Kyle''s surprise she actually seemed to know quite a bit about putting together a campfire. Of course she insisted she knew a lot about everything,so it was kind of hard to tell when she knew what she was talking about and just being obnoxious.


    The evening had been spent mostly cutting vegetables, but now Ammeline was standing over the pot stirring the curry, glaring at it with a critical eye almost as if it had offended her. Kyle was sitting against a log near the campfire, Jenny''s head resting on his chest.


    ¡°What are you thinking about?¡± Jenny asked.


    ¡°I was hoping Ammeline''s as good a cook as she thinks she is or we''re going to have stomach cramps during training tomorrow.¡±


    ¡°I heard that!¡± Ammeline called back. ¡°My curry will be legendary! Worthy of a princess! You will all grovel for the chance to eat more of my wondrous cooking, and I will....oops! No! Stop!¡±


    She hurriedly turned her attention to something in the pout, and Kyle chuckled. He settled back into silence for a while.


    ¡°This is nice,¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°It is,¡± he said, squeezing her around the waist.


    ¡°I don''t just mean us,¡± Jenny said. ¡°I mean all of this. All of them. It didn''t feel right, when we were off on our own. It''s good to have everyone around.¡±


    Kyle looked around the campfire. Betty and Trevor were across the way, in much the same position as Kyle and Jenny. Betty was talking seriously about something, and Trevor had a big goofy smile on his face. Kyle wondered idly if whatever Betty was talking about was dirty, or at least included the phrase ¡°lust overcome you.¡± Moonlight was beside them, stretched out on the dirt and basking in the heat from the fire.


    Turning to the other side of the fire was Goldie and Eric. A very...different couple. They weren''t cuddled up, it was more like Evan was trying to sort of ooze over Goldie. She was pushing him away...but not very hard, Kyle noticed, and every time he was about to give up she did something to goad him on again.


    Tanya was away from the fire, deep in conversation with her father. Kyle could catch a word now and then, things like ¡°elemental power¡± and ¡°focus control,¡± so he assumed that tomorrow''s training was being sorted out in detail.


    ¡°It is nice,¡± he said. ¡°And you got your curry cookout.¡±


    ¡°Well not yet,¡± Jenny said. ¡°Not until Ammeline says the curry is ready.¡±


    ¡°And I guess I''m getting my full on anime training arc,¡± Kyle sighed. ¡°Always wanted to try one of those. I wonder if I''ll have to stand under a waterfall?¡±


    ¡°Oh I''ve seen that!¡± She said. ¡°And some of the wizard-hermits used to do that too, back in Uzbedi. Ancient Uzbedi I mean. I dunno how useful it is for training. But are there any waterfalls around here?¡±


    ¡°Guess I''ll find out,¡± Kyle sighed. ¡°You know what the only problem with tonight is?¡±


    ¡°What''s that?¡± Jenny asked.


    ¡°It''s too peaceful,¡± Kyle said. ¡°If I were watching this in a show, I''d know for SURE villains were about to start causing a mess, any minute now....¡±


    They lay in silence together. No evil chose to appear, and they settled back into comfortable quiet as the curry was made.


    But Kevin couldn''t shake the feeling that at the far end of all this peace, something horrible was about to happen.

 Chapter 33: Flock of Ducks

    The morning came far, far too early for Kyle''s taste. And when it came it came, to Kyle''s complete lack of surprise, to the sound of a loudly quacking duck.


    ¡°Get up get up get up!¡± Dr. Myrden bellowed, walking out to the cool and empty fire pit. Everyone had fallen asleep around the fire the night before, with a promise from Tanya that the fire was magically treated to take care of itself. Now they awoke to find her father standing over them, a glowing yellow duck on his head quacking like a maniac as he clapped his hands and shouted. ¡°Arcane mastery won''t be learned in a single day! Come on everybody, get up!¡±


    ¡°No!¡± Jenny mumbled, curling into a ball. There was a shimmer of purple light around her that turned into something not unlike a blanket.


    ¡°Showing off your newfound talents in minor conjuring changes nothing! Everyone get up, you''ve all got a new training regimen!¡±


    ¡°I''ve got this,¡± Kyle said. He leaned down and picked up Jenny, holding her over one shoulder like a bale of hay. ¡°She either wakes up immediately or not at all, this could take a while.¡±


    ¡°We are all awake,¡± Betty said, rubbing her eyes. ¡°You can stop the quacking.¡±


    ¡°Or I can kill your duck,¡± Evan suggested.


    ¡°Try it kiddo,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°But you''ve got a point. Juniper? You can stop quacking now.¡±


    ¡°Quack.¡±


    ¡°I know you like quacking, that''s why I use you for this job. But I need to do some teaching now. Anyway! I''m talking to humans now, humans, so pay attention. And genie.¡±


    ¡°I am still asleep!¡± Jenny insisted from within the blankets.


    ¡°Today I will be giving each of you personal coaching on yout powers and the best way to hone them,¡± Dr. Myrden ignored her. ¡°I will be with you all day, observing how you use your powers and determining ways for you to further improve. Now the first thing we''re going to do is split into training groups.¡±


    ¡°Wait,¡± Goldie said. ¡°How are you going to be with each of us the entire day when we''re splitting into training groups?¡±


    ¡°Oh no dad,¡± Tanya groaned. ¡°Not that.¡±


    ¡°Oh yes!¡± Her father said. ¡°That! Juniper, you should probably head home.¡±


    ¡°Quack.¡±


    Once the duck on his head had flown off, Dr. Myrden''s entire body began to glow.


    ¡°Only those with great mastery of magic know this technique,¡± Dr. Myrden said, his voice echoing strangely from the light that burned within. ¡°The power to divide oneself into many parts, so that different parts of you can complete different tasks. It is one of the most....¡±


    ¡°DUCKS!¡± Evan shouted, pointing an accusing finger. ¡°You can''t fool me, it''s going to be ducks! It''s going to be ducks somehow! Every single magical thing you do is absolutely covered in ducks! So go ahead! Go ahead and shows us the ducks! How does this power turn into ducks? I''m waiting for you! In fact I dare you! I double dog dare you! Whip out some more magic with more frigging ducks!¡±


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    The light around his body began to glow, brighter and brighter, until even with his enhanced abilities Kyle could barely stand to look at it. Then the light seemed to stretch to the sides, like someone had grabbed and pulled it out, further and further, until it snapped into three. When they light faded, three identical figures stood where Dr. Myrden had stood just moments before.


    They were, indeed, ducks.


    ¡°I KNEW IT!¡± Evan screamed, jumping up and down and waving his fists. ¡°I knew it! I knew it I knew it I knew it...¡±


    ¡°Enough of that!¡± The duck in the front said. The ducks had brown and black patterned feathers, with deep orange bills. They also had somehow retained Dr. Myrden''s beard, hat, and cane. The cane was tucked under a wing, and the beard grew out from the bottom of their bill. ¡°Maybe someday you''ll be lucky enough to have a totem. Anyway, we''re splitting into three groups. Tanya, Goldie, you''ll be coming with me.¡±


    ¡°Why us?¡± Goldie asked, looking over at Tanya.


    ¡°Because the training for someone just starting to learn spellcasting and someone mastering spellcasting is actually very similar,¡± the bearded duck said. ¡°No more complaining, this way.¡±


    He waddled off, Tanya and Goldie following with him.


    ¡°Evan! Betty!¡± The second duck said. ¡°You both need to learn mental disciplines to further control your powers. You three are a training group. With me.¡±


    ¡°I will not be with Trevor?¡± Betty said, adjusting her glasses.


    ¡°You and Trevor need completely different training. You and Evan need similar training. It makes sense.¡±


    ¡°What do I have plague now or something?¡± Evan asked,


    ¡°Not that I am aware of,¡± Betty said. ¡°Your medical situation is unknown to me. Though I have frequently suspected pathological behavior...¡±


    ¡°Never mind,¡± Evan said grumpily. ¡°Come on, Duck Daddy, show us where we''re training.¡±


    ¡°Do not call me that,¡± the bearded duck said, leading them all off.


    ¡°Which leaves the four of you,¡± the final remaining duck waddled up to Kyle, Ammeline, Trevor, and Jenny. ¡°The four of you need the most physical training. So we''ll work in sparring teams.¡±


    ¡°I guess that makes sense,¡± Trevor said.


    ¡°Ahahahaha!¡± Ammeline said. ¡°Is it really fair for me to duel unarmed combatants when I have a sword? Or do you intend to teach me unarmed combat?¡±


    ¡°It wouldn''t hurt you to learn some but no,¡± the bearded duck said. ¡°Fisticuffs I don''t teach. What I teach is magic. All of you have magic related to your physical skills.¡±


    ¡°Even Jenny?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°She''s literally stapled to your soul, so it''s a package deal. Having you train separately at this stage would be pointless. I''ve worked out a plan that will help all four of you reach the heights of perfection.¡±


    ¡°And here I was thinking I was already there...¡± Ammeline said wistfully.


    ¡°Come along,¡± He said. ¡°Your training grounds are this way.¡±


    He waddled off, and they followed him into the trees until they reached a large pond. The water was crisp and clear, Kyle could see fish and frogs swimming around in the water.


    ¡°I''m not like Evan and his whole freaking out about the ducks thing,¡± Trevor said. ¡°But are we actually going to be training in a duck pond?¡±


    ¡°It''s just a regular pond!¡± the Dr. Myrden duck said. ¡°I''ve been thinking of upgrading it to a duck pond, but it''s just a regular pond. Well no, not actually, it''s an incredibly magical pond. But it is an incredibly magical ordinary pond, not an incredibly magical duck pond.¡±


    ¡°Jenny you need to get down now,¡± Kyle sighed.


    ¡°No!¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°If you don''t wake up I''m going to dump you in the pond.¡±


    ¡°You wouldn''t.¡±


    ¡°Yes, I would absolutely pass up a chance to see my hot genie girlfriend in tight wet clothes. That is certainly something I would do, because I would not enjoy that in the slightest.¡±


    ¡°Okay okay,¡± Jenny sighed. Her conjured blanket shimmered and disappeared and she hopped off of Kyle''s shoulder. ¡°But only because it''s magical and I''m afraid of what will happen if I splash into it.¡±


    ¡°Oh yeah,¡± Kyle said. ¡°That''s a good point.¡±


    ¡°It is a very good point,¡± Ammeline said suspiciously. ¡°What exactly is so magical about this pond?¡±


    ¡°Well to start with...¡± Dr. Myrden waved his cane with his duck wing.


    ¡°How are you gripping that?¡± Kyle asked.


    ¡°Shh! I''m doing magic.¡±


    In the pond, a series of rock platforms in a seemingly random pattern rose from the water, creating a mazelike collection of them above the surface.


    ¡°Alright!¡± Dr. Myrden clapped his wings together.


    ¡°And how did that make a clapping sound? The ends of your wings are all feathers...¡±


    ¡°Now that we''re all set up,¡± Dr. Myrden ignored him, ¡°who wants to go first?¡±

 Chapter 34: Ducks In a Pond

    ¡°First?¡± Ammeline stepped forward, whipping out her fencing sword. ¡°Ahahahahahaha! I will be first upon this stage! I am fully prepared to face any one of you in a challenge of combat!¡±


    ¡°Don''t you want to hear the rules first?¡± Dr. Myrden, still in the form of a small bearded magical duck, said with a cocked eyebrow.


    ¡°We have been given a limited space with even more limited footholds and you said we would be sparring with each other. I have seen television.¡±


    ¡°She has a point,¡± Jenny said. ¡°I''ve only been in this millennium a couple of months now and it seems pretty obvious to me.¡±


    ¡°Is that so?¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°Well then Jenny, do you want to be the one to go in and fight her?¡±


    ¡°Me?¡± Jenny blinked. ¡°But...I don''t know, I mean, didn''t you say I was just kind of tagging along because I''m magically bonded to Master? I mean Kyle? Sorry Kyle I still slip up on that sometimes, thousands of years of habit.¡±


    ¡°Just be glad Evan isn''t here,¡± Trevor said. ¡°He''d explode.¡±


    ¡°I dunno maybe not,¡± Kyle said. ¡°He''s got his own thing going on right now.¡±


    ¡°I''ve noticed that as well!¡± Ammeline said cheerfully. ¡°Who knew all he needed was a woman who was both irritated with him and attracted to him? I believe his relationship with Goldie will be good for them both...¡±


    ¡°No!¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°No more of that! You''ve been having hormonal teenager moments ever since you got here! We are training now! Magic! Magic fighting!¡±


    ¡°I think slice of life moments are pretty popular actually, judging by reader response...¡±


    ¡°Hush!¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°I said you''re training, so train! Go get on the stones.¡±


    ¡°So we are dueling each other on the stones!¡± Ammeline said.


    ¡°Yes that''s the idea,¡± Dr. Myrden said.


    ¡°Okay!¡± Jenny said, jumping on the stones, pinkish energy flickering around her fingertips. ¡°I guess if I''m going to do this, I''m going to do my best not to lose!¡±


    ¡°Excellent!¡± Ammeline said, leaping onto the stones with a forward flip. After a perfect landing she executed a sequence of slashes and thrusts with her rapier at the empty air. ¡°Do you remember Jenny, I once said you were not my rival in fencing? Well now we have stepped into the ring, I will prove myself superior once again! Ahahahahaha!¡±


    ¡°Is there a signal to begin the fight?¡± Jenny asked.


    ¡°Oh you''ll know when it happens,¡± Dr. Myrden said.


    Jenny and Ammeline faced each other through slitted eyes, waiting for the moment to being their battle. Then the stone platforms disappeared under the surface again and dropped them both into the water.


    ¡°AHHHH!¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°Ooup!¡± Ammeline gasped, before bother were plunged into the pond.


    ¡°Also the stones were only staying up because I was putting my magic power into the water,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°This is magic training. If you want a solid surface to fight on, you''re going to have to have enough control of your magical energy to both fight each other and keep a constant stream of power flowing into the pond. Oh, and it has to be an equal amount from each of you, so you''ll have to focus on your opponent''s power use as well.¡±


    ¡°Why didn''t you tell us that?¡± Ammeline said, flailing and sputtering in the pond.


    ¡°Why did I need to? After all, you''ve seen television.¡±


    ¡°Curse you and the consequences of my own actions!¡± Ammeline said. ¡°If I did not swim like a graceful mermaid...¡±


    ¡°You look more like a diseased flounder at the moment,¡± Trevor said.


    ¡°Trevor Lu you will pay for that!¡± Ammeline shouted, any menace her words might have had ruined by the mouthful of water she swallowed while she was yelling that she then had to cough and spit out.


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    ¡°Ammeline, come on!¡± Jenny said. ¡°I don''t swim like a mermaid, I swim like someone who comes from a desert and spent most of her time in a lamp!¡±


    ¡°Actually when you put it that way you swim exceedingly well for someone who comes from a desert and spent most of her time in a lamp,¡± Ammeline said. ¡°I''m proud of you for staying afloat, honestly.¡±


    ¡°Let''s just get our magic in the water so we can stand on something again!¡±


    ¡°Yes, that would probably be best.¡±


    It took a little focusing and arguing, but a few minutes later the stones rose from the bottom of the pond again. Jenny and Ammeline clambered up onto them, wringing water out of their thoroughly drenched clothes and hair.


    ¡°Hey!¡± Kyle said. ¡°I got to see you in wet clothes after all!¡±


    ¡°Kyle I love you, but if you keep talking you will never see me without clothes ever again.¡±


    ¡°You remembered to call me Kyle!¡±


    ¡°It wasn''t hard this time.¡±


    ¡°The boys do seem to be taking an unholy amount of glee in this,¡± Ammeline gave them a suspicious glare. ¡°Don''t you have a girlfriend?¡±


    ¡°Oh please you''re wearing a dark shirt and jeans,¡± Trevor said. ¡°You''re no more revealing than you were a second ago. I''m laughing at the situation.¡±


    ¡°Jenny was wearing all white,¡± Ammeline pointed out.


    ¡°I''m not looking at her,¡± Trevor said.


    ¡°I''m starting to see what Betty means about having lust overcome you,¡± Ammeline said. ¡°Can''t we get a towel, or wooooah!¡±


    Jenny and Ammeline flailed as the stones shifted underneath them for a moment.


    ¡°Ammeline be careful!¡± Jenny said. ¡°Or we''re gonna end up swimming again.¡±


    ¡°I''m having trouble keeping up with you!¡± Ammeline said. ¡°And that is the last time you will ever hear me say that. But you''re pouring so much magic into the water! You must have ten or twelve times as much magical power as I have.¡±


    ¡°That''s because she''s a magical creature,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°For what it''s worth, Jenny, you can reduce the amount of magic you''re putting out. It only needs a trickle, not a flood.¡±


    ¡°Oh okay!¡± Jenny said. ¡°So I can just eep!¡±


    They stumbled and flailed on the stones for a moment again.


    ¡°Don''t just suddenly change how much you''re putting out!¡± Ammeline glared. ¡°We have to be even, remember?¡±


    ¡°Sorry, sorry!¡± Jenny said. ¡°That one was my fault. But is this good?¡±


    ¡°Yes I think I can keep up with this,¡± Ammeline sighed. ¡°Now we just have to wait for the fight to start.¡±


    ¡°The fight started when I retracted my own magic from the pond,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°Go. Fight. Stay as dry as possible.¡±


    ¡°Well them...hah!¡± Ammeline lunged forwards, the tip of her rapier swinging close to Jenny''s shoulder.


    ¡°Oh no you don''t!¡± Jenny said, diving out of the way. ¡°Hah yourself!¡±


    Jenny chopped her glowing hand through the air and glittering lights appeared around Ammeline''s eyes.


    ¡°That trick won''t work on me!¡± Ammeline said, her next swing actually slapping Jenny in the stomach.


    ¡°Oof!¡± Jenny said, steadying herself on one of the rocks. ¡°How did you see me?¡±


    ¡°I actually have a problem with sweat getting in my eyes during fencing matches,¡± Ammeline said. ¡°I''ve learned to react with my other senses at a moment''s notice. Of course it''s a little different here, since fencing is played on a very limited filed where you can only move backwards and forwards, but still....¡±


    ¡°All very interesting,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°But Ammeline, you''re not putting any magic into your sword strikes.¡±


    ¡°If I put magic into my sword strikes I could seriously hurt Jenny,¡± Ammeline pointed out. ¡°Without my magic this is an ordinary fencing sword. No edges, no tip. With my magic it''s suddenly super sharp and super strong. I''ve demolished cars with it. And wounded demons.¡±


    ¡°Ah yes. That''s a fair point. Hmm. Let me see it.¡± Dr. Myrden fluttered over next to Ammeline and she held out the sword. ¡°You''ve got a point, your fighting style is pretty lethal. Which will be all well and good for monster fighting, but for training....there you go.¡±


    ¡°It doesn''t feel any different,¡± Ammeline said.


    ¡°I am one of five mystical duck avatars split off from an ancient wizard, just accept it''s magic and go with it.¡±


    ¡°Well alright,¡± Ammeline said. ¡°Jenny, resume our battle?¡±


    ¡°Sure! Look, I can do this now!¡± Jenny said, throwing two bolts of glowing magical energy in Ammeline''s direction. Ammeline dodged out of the way, landing on another rock.


    ¡°You have been improving!¡± Ammeline laughed. ¡°But let me show you some real fighting moves!¡±


    Ammeline lunged forward, the point of her her sword out. It ramed into Jenny''s stomach...and kept going. Ammeline''s eyesd widened in surprise as Jenny bonked her on top of the head. Jenny pulled her sword back, staring at Jenny''s uninjured stomach and then at her unbroken blade.


    ¡°Oops!¡± Jenny said. ¡°Sorry, did that hurt? I know we''re training, but I''m not sure what just happened.¡±


    ¡°I am!¡± Ammeline said. She waved her fingers through the blade of her fencing sword. They passed through like she was touching a mirage. ¡°My blade is useless now!¡±


    ¡°No,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°It''s not useless. It''s just intangible unless you put magic into it. You were still holding back.¡±


    Ammeline focused for a moment, and the next time she touched the blade it was solid.


    ¡°See? The magic you need to keep it solid is similar to the magic you need for your techniques, and it will remain harmless. Now fight for real.¡±


    ¡°Well if the last of my concerns are dealt with,¡± Ammeline said with a sly grin. ¡°Then I suppose we had better begin!¡±


    ¡°You won''t get me that easily!¡± Jenny said, running forward, magic crackling along her fingers.


    ¡°Take this!¡± Ammeline shouted, her blade pulled back for a sweeping cut. The two charged in for a clash....and promptly fell in the water as their footholds disappeared.


    ¡°I think that was you.¡±


    ¡°AHAHAHAHAHA DO YOU? BECAUSE I THINK.....¡±


    ¡°They both forgot to control their magic,¡± Dr. Myrden sighed, shaking his duck billed head an turning back to Kyle and Trevor. ¡°You boys might need to wait a while for your turn...¡±

 Chapter 35: Duck Pond, Deeper

    By the time their sparring was done there was no clear winner, and both had thoroughly dampened spirits. And clothes. Not as damp as you might expect however, since they''d actually spent the last half hour of the spar drying out. That was when the platforms had stopped disappearing altogether. Kyle had a sneaking suspicion that last half hour had been about making sure their control wasn''t about to waver again.


    ¡°Well done girls, well done!¡± the the wizard duck said as they carefully stepped back onto solid ground. ¡°Alright boys, you ready to go?¡±


    ¡°Guess so,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°I suppose we are,¡± Trevor said, frowning at the pond.


    ¡°What''s the matter kid?¡± Dr. Myrden said, glaring over his bill. ¡°Don''t like my training methods? Think you know better?¡±


    ¡°It''s not that,¡± Trevor shook his head. ¡°I was thinking about the arena. It''s just that the arena''s pretty bad from me. I''m trained mostly in Judo and Jiu Jitsu. That''s a lot of submission and grappling and rolling around on the floor. Oh, but I completely get that I''ll need to learn to fight on all kinds of different terrain, so...¡±


    ¡°No,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°I mean yes, yes you will. But this training is about magic control. Let me make a few adjustments.¡±


    The wizard-duck focused, and the platforms disappeared. A moment later a flat oval of stone rose from the water to form a fighting arena.


    ¡°Hey!¡± Jenny said. ¡°What about having to balance and focus while they fight? Wasn''t that the point of the whole thing?¡±


    ¡°I understand that was a distraction from our control of our magical power,¡± Ammeline said. ¡°But this does some somewhat unfair. And we had consequences for losing control of our magic! What happens to them?¡±


    ¡°I mean the whole platform could sink,¡± Jenny said. ¡°That''s basically what happened to us...¡±


    ¡°Regardless!¡± Ammeline waved Jenny''s reasonable argument away with her hand and continue with her usual dramatics. ¡°This appears heavily unbalanced!¡±


    ¡°Why is everyone questioning my teaching methods today!?¡± Dr. Myrden complained. ¡°This guy wanted the arena changed, people are stealing my best summoned beasts, Evan is thinking with his dick and his dick can''t make up it''s mind, even my own granddaughter is being difficult!¡±


    ¡°Wait,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Are you aware of what the other duck versions of you are doing?¡±


    ¡°Of course!¡± Dr. Myrden snapped. ¡°We''re still all the same person!¡±


    ¡°But that would mean...¡± Kyle rubbed his temples. ¡°Wouldn''t that make this the most powerful spell ever?¡±


    ¡°HAH!¡± Dr. Myrden''s laugh was, unsurprisingly in this form, more of a quack. ¡°HAH! There, I just laughed in your face twice. No. Not it wouldn''t. This spell is covered in limitations. And besides, just wait until you see what magic can really do. When that happens you''ll think of this as a trick best meant for children''s parties. Now come on, get on the platform. And you!¡±


    He whirled on Ammeline and Jenny, pointing a cane at them with an accusing wing.


    ¡°Think I''m going easy on the boys, do you? Think I''d sacrifice my training by the littlest tiny bit?¡±


    ¡°Not really,¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°Jenny made a good point before, actually, about...¡±


    ¡°Well you''re wrong!¡± Dr. Myrden snapped. ¡°And I''ll prove it to you!¡±


    Sparks of light shot out from his cane and encased Jenny and Ammeline each in their own glittering bubble of magical force.


    ¡°Hey!¡± Kyle said, but Dr. Myrden held up a wing.


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    ¡°They''re not in prison, these are viewing globes.¡±


    ¡°If I can''t break the walls then it counts as a prison!¡± Ammeline said angrily, jabbing at the sphere of energy with her fencing sword.


    ¡°They''re so that the girls can watch what happens in safety.¡±


    ¡°Wait,¡± Trevor said. ¡°Safety?¡±


    ¡°Uhm, Doctor,¡± Jenny said. ¡°I feel it''s maybe just a little possible you''re really angry at our friends, not us, and you''re taking out your frustration at whatever they''re doing in their own training on Kyle and Trevor, which isn''t really fair...¡±


    ¡°Going down!¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°Dive dive dive!¡±


    The platform began to lower under the water. Kyle and Trevor braced themselves to get splashed, but the water never touched them. Instead it crept up the side of some kind of invisible dome guarding the platform, until they stood in a bubble of air deep, deep beneath the surface of the pond.


    Very deep beneath the surface of the pond.


    ¡°Was this pond always this deep?¡± Trevor asked, squinting at the surface high above.


    ¡°I guess it''s magic,¡± Kyle shrugged.


    ¡°Yeah I guess so,¡± Trevor sighed. ¡°We are getting way to used to just shrugging things off when we say that.¡±


    ¡°My girlfriend is a mystical genie and I had to fight a crazed demon who had fused with my childhood bully a few days ago,¡± Kyle pointed out. ¡°Is a pond deeper than it should be all that weird in comparison?¡±


    ¡°No of course not,¡± Trevor sighed. ¡°That doesn''t make me happier about things.¡±


    A few moments later, just outside their bubble of air, another bubble appeared. This one was about the size of a minivan, and standing in it were Jenny, Ammeline, and down by their ankles the feathered form of Dr. Myrden as a mystical duck.


    Just another one of those things they would shrug off.


    ¡°Imbalance your magic and the bubble disappears,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°Balance again and it reappears. Oh, and it empties itself too.¡±


    ¡°Oh,¡± Ammeline said. ¡°Yes, this is much fairer.¡±


    ¡°How is this fairer?¡± Kyle demanded. ¡°He could have just made the platform beneath us disappear! And what the hell is that!?¡±


    An enormous blue and yellow eye had made itself visible outside the bubble, on the far side from where the girls and Dr. Myrden sat in audience.


    ¡°Oh don''t mind that,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°That''s the Kraken.¡±


    ¡°There''s a kraken down here!?¡± Trevor gasped.


    ¡°He''s a good boy! His name is Sherwin. He''s a little hungry right now though so he might be dangerous. But he''s no harm to anyone in a force bubble. Like you won''t be if you don''t balance your magic!¡±


    ¡°Wait a minute!¡± Trevor said. ¡°The girls didn''t have to deal with a kraken. I feel like that''s going a little far.¡±


    ¡°Well I could give you a whole speech about how the girls have a lot less combat experience than you so you need increased danger, but I''m not going to let you stall for any more time to get your magic balanced before we start. GO!¡±


    There was a moment of hushed tension and...nothing happened.


    Well not quite. Trevor and Kyle both winced as if someone had just thrown a heavy sandbag to them and they''d had to catch it. But other than that, nothing.


    ¡°Oh good!¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°Good good! You''re off to a good start.¡±


    ¡°This is crazy!¡± Trevor said, through clenched teeth. ¡°I''m keeping up, but it''s taking so much out of me! You''ve got so much magical power I can''t believe it!¡±


    ¡°Yeah but yours is like concrete!¡± Kyle said. ¡°It''s so heavy and hard! Can my magic bruise, squeezing up against yours like this? Is that a thing?¡±


    ¡°And here we''re looking at the difference between a higher quality node and a lot of lower quality nodes. Not that your nodes aren''t high quality. You''ve got magnificent nodes.¡±


    ¡°I am eternally grateful Evan isn''t here,¡± Ammeline groaned.


    ¡°But you''ve got a lot of nodes that are lower quality than Trevor''s single node. So you can produce a lot more magic, Kyle, but his magic is a lot harder to resist. Something to keep in mind. It''s why someone with a hundred tiny nodes isn''t automatically stronger than someone with three large nodes.¡±


    ¡°Now I''m just afraid of what Evan would say,¡± Ammeline said. ¡°I should never have allowed my mind down this cursed path.¡±


    ¡°But enough of that boys you''re here to fight. So fight! And keep your magic balance!¡±


    And they did.


    Their fighting movements were stiff, at first, but they got more and more fluid as time went on. And as they fought and sparred, there wasn''t a single tremor from the done.


    ¡°I''m starting to get upset,¡± Ammeline said.


    ¡°Why?¡± Jenny asked.


    ¡°How come they''re having such an easy time controlling their magic?¡±


    ¡°Well part of it is because they both have greater reserves than you do,¡± Dr. Myrden explained. ¡°Well, not really in your case Jenny but your situation is more complicated. It does help, if you can both just ramp your magic up another level. Another reason is because they saw you go first, so they were already thinking about how to handle this exercise.¡±


    ¡°Oh I suppose that makes sense,¡± Jenny cocked her head. ¡°Still, I suppose I wanted to see Kyle in wet clothes. I mean it would be fair.¡±


    ¡°Oh that''s easy!¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°Just say the word nipples.¡±


    ¡°I should say what?¡± Jenny blinked.


    ¡°Just say the word nipples,¡± Dr. Myrden replied.


    ¡°How would saying the word ¡°nipples¡± do anything...¡±


    ¡°What?¡± Kyle said, turning his head in Jenny''s direction. Trevor caught him across the face with a right hook, and the magical balance was shattered. Water came in like a hammer, and they found themselves flailing in the water and a sudden forest of angry tentacles.


    ¡°I''ll be honest,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°I only told you to do that because I''m having a bad day and I wanted to see them fight a kraken.¡±

 Chapter 36: Ducks When You Least Expect Them

    Elsewhere in the woods around the cabin, a very different training exercise was going on.


    ¡°Admit it,¡± Evan said. ¡°You took this from a movie.¡±


    ¡°That''s neither here no there!¡± Dr. Myrden''s duck form said, pointing his cane accusingly at Evan. ¡°You''re here to try and learn to focus your mental powers. So focus.¡±


    Evan sat cross legged on the ground, holding a rock in his hand. He was supposed to be focusing on the rock and only the rock. And supposedly, once he managed to do that, everything else around him would vanish.


    ¡°What exactly is the point of this again?¡± Evan sighed.


    ¡°Your physical enhancement to your agility was a good choice,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°Because it paired well with the mental enhancement that seems to be the primary focus of your magical power. By mastering total focus, you can make the best use of both those skills. At the moment, your mental enhancement is like an enormous, incredibly powerful supercomputer hooked up to your brain. So unfortunately, anything it does has to go through your brain.¡±


    ¡°I would feel insulted if I wasn''t so focused,¡± Evan said dryly.


    ¡°But training your mind to focus, you''ll be better able to make use of that computer, which in turn will help you use your high speed and agility in combat. So focus.¡±


    ¡°And what''s Betty doing exactly?¡± Evan asked.


    ¡°She''s actually focusing,¡± Dr. Myrden said.


    ¡°That''s not what I meant.¡±


    ¡°Betty is in a unique position,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°She''s perfectly suited to be a summoner. Not only is that her inclination, but if you take a moment to consider her nodes...¡±


    ¡°Trevor will get mad,¡± Evan said.


    ¡°See this is why I call you an idiot and don''t explain things,¡± the wizard-duck glared. ¡°She has six nodes, and in her central node she has already bound the spirit of a Five Elements Cat.¡±


    ¡°So creatures you can summon live in your nodes?¡± Evan blinked. ¡°Is that how it works?¡±


    ¡°That''s one way, and the way she''s best suited for. In any case, the Five Elements Cat is a creature tied to all five of the classical Asian elements. Wood, Fire, Earth, Metal, and Water. That means she''s already got a connection to all five, and five remaining nodes. If she can attune each node to a different element, she can have one summon for each element plus it will greatly increase the power of her Five Elements Cat.¡±


    ¡°And you decided to start with water,¡± Evan nodded.


    ¡°Yes. She used water so extensively in the fight with the mutant efreet, one of her nodes was already halfway to being aligned there. So we started with that.¡±


    ¡°My urge to make a joke about nodes aside, is that why she''s over there sitting in the river?¡±


    They both looked over to where Betty was up to her waist in water.


    ¡°Technically that''s more of a deep brook.¡±


    ¡°Did you tell her to sit in the brook?¡±


    ¡°No,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°I did not tell her to do that. She just did that on her own.¡±


    ¡°I am afraid I am having some difficulty,¡± Betty said out loud.


    ¡°Well I''m not surprised,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°You''re sitting in a brook.¡±


    ¡°I have attempted to summon an entity of water into my node,¡± Betty said.


    ¡°What? Why?¡± Dr. Myrden sputtered. ¡°Why would you do that?¡±


    ¡°It felt like my node was perfectly attuned so it just made sense to try,¡± Betty shrugged.


    ¡°Well stop that!¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°Come out of the brook and dry off already.¡±


    Betty stood up and made her way to shore, dripping with brook water. Perhaps running would be a better word, she had gotten thoroughly soaked. Her normally bulky clothes clung to her as she made her way to dry land, but she seemed characteristically oblivious to anything having to do with her appearance. She sat down with a wet splat across from Evan.


    ¡°Now just try to focus on what you remember the water being like,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°You don''t need to actually be in water for this. The feeling is more important than the actual substance.¡±


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    ¡°If you say so,¡± Betty said. ¡°Besides, I think I am still sufficiently close to water at this point to have ready inspiration.¡±


    ¡°Yeah I''m getting some ready inspiration too,¡± Evan grinned. ¡°In fact, I-ow!!!¡±


    Dr. Myrden whacked him in the knee with his cane.


    ¡°None of that!¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°You focus on focusing! She focuses on water! Now I''m going to go sit over there because my other selves are taking up a lot of my attention right now and if you''re doing this right you''ll be sitting here doing nothing.¡±


    ¡°I thought we were focusing?¡±


    ¡°Shut up.¡±


    The duck-wizard waddled away, leaving the two of them on their own, concentrating. They made it a good while before they broke concentration. And, to Evan''s surprise, it was Betty who spoke first.


    ¡°Oh,¡± she said. ¡°I understand. You were saying you find me aesthetically pleasing, with my clothes clinging to my body that way.¡±


    ¡°Huh?¡± Evan blinked. ¡°Oh. Yeah. I guess that''s what I meant.¡±


    ¡°Ah,¡± Betty said, then returned to her meditation. They sat in silence for another good long while.


    ¡°Do you...ever think about it?¡± Evan asked.


    ¡°About what?¡± Betty asked, not opening her eyes.


    ¡°About what it would have been like,¡± he said. ¡°If I hadn''t already had a date with Goldie to the dance. You liked me, didn''t you?¡±


    ¡°Yes,¡± Betty said. ¡°I didn''t know you knew.¡±


    ¡°I kinda guessed,¡± Evan said.


    ¡°I see. Were you waiting for me to make the first move?¡±


    ¡°No I was....I don''t know. Hoping you wouldn''t, I guess.¡±


    ¡°Oh.¡±


    ¡°No that''s not what I mean!¡± Evan said. ¡°I was just...happy with the way things were. And scared of having that conversation. And I thought...¡±


    ¡°You did not expect me to begin dating Trevor.¡±


    ¡°....yeah. I guess that''s what I mean.¡±


    ¡°You were taking me for granted, on the supposition out friendship would remain as it always was forever.¡±


    ¡°I sound kind of terrible when you put it like that,¡± Evan sighed.


    ¡°I do not think you are terrible,¡± Betty said. ¡°However, you are irrefutably short sighted, selfish, and intentionally abrasive.¡±


    ¡°Thank you,¡± Evan said dryly.


    ¡°But you are also one of my two oldest friends,¡± Betty said. ¡°And I would not want to jeopardize that either. Your objections to pursuing a relationship between us were not wrong. I will admit I was upset when you turned me down, but things have turned out well. Trevor and I are together, though he has not yet lust overcome him. Kyle is being significantly more sensually proactive with Betty. And you have Goldie.¡±


    ¡°Whatever''s going on with Goldie.¡± Evan shook his head. ¡°I know, Kyle finding that lamp has brought all kinds of magic into our lives, but when I think about things going forwards...I dunno, maybe I wish it could have been simpler. That none of it happened, and I''d gone to the dance with you, and whatever.¡±


    ¡°The road not taken is very easy to focus on,¡± Betty said. ¡°But if things are good now, maybe we should all be happy with that.¡±


    ¡°I suppose you''ve got a point,¡± Evan said. ¡°I just...what are you doing?¡±


    ¡°I am going to try to bond a familiar of the water element,¡± Betty said, scraping a circle in the dirt with the edge of a stick.


    ¡°He specifically told us not to do that!¡± Evan said.


    ¡°I do not recall you being a stickler for the rules,¡± Betty said. ¡°I believe I am capable of doing this. I remember from when I bound Moonlight. Besides, when I focus on my nodes the one I have fully attuned to water feels...strange.¡±


    ¡°So you''re just going to summon...what?¡± Evan asked.


    ¡°I am not certain,¡± Betty said. ¡°We will soon find out.¡±


    Betty sat cross legged in front of the circle, palms held together, as she started to recite the spell. Within a few moments there was a soft blue glow, and something that looked like a bubble with fins and eyes bounced into existence withing the circle.


    ¡°Ah,¡± Betty said. ¡°Success.¡±


    ¡°What are you doing?¡± Dr. Myrden demanded, waddling over. ¡°Dammit! I''ve got chaos on every front now! You actually summoned a water spirit?¡±


    ¡°It would appear so,¡± Betty confirmed.


    ¡°Well fine,¡± Dr. Myrden sighed in frustration. ¡°Bond it, I guess. It''s an unformed spirit. Not a bad choice, it''ll grow with your power over time until it finds a permanent form. Now that you''ve summoned it, go ahead and try to bring it into your node.¡±


    Betty nodded, and with a surge of power that felt like flowing rivers the bubble creature floated in Betty''s direction, swimming towards her chest.


    It bounced off.


    ¡°That was not supposed to happen,¡± Betty said.


    ¡°No it wasn''t!¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°You''ve been doing this already, haven''t you!? You tried this before!¡±


    ¡°No I did not!¡± Betty said. ¡°This was the very time I intentionally summoned a magical being without supervision.¡±


    ¡°Well it would only get rejected like that if you already had something living in your water node!¡± Dr. Myrden said.


    ¡°Maybe she did it by accident,¡± Evan suggested. ¡°That''s how she summoned Moonlight in the first place.¡±


    ¡°Well it doesn''t matter now we''ve got to get rid of the water spirit!¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°Before....¡±


    ¡°DECIEVER!!!!¡± The bubble spirit shrieked in a voice like a boiling teakettle. ¡°LIAR! CRUEL TEMPTRESS!¡±


    ¡°...it gets angry and morphs into a vengeful spirit,¡± Dr. Myrden sighed.


    ¡°But you''re an incredibly powerful wizard right?¡± Evan said. ¡°You can handle this no problem.¡±


    ¡°Yes but I won''t,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°You two made this mess, you two get to fix it.¡±


    ¡°Oh dammit,¡± Evan said, grabbing a rock. The creature had, by this point, expanded into a huge glob of boiling water, with parts spreading off that looked like tentacles. He threw the rock at it, which splashed through without doing any damage.


    ¡°Dammit!¡± Evan said. ¡°Betty, help! Summon Moonlight!


    ¡°I wonder what is living in my node?¡± Betty said thoughtfully.


    ¡°I dunno, summon that I guess but this is getting out of hand!¡±


    By now the creature was eight or nine feet tall of boiling, raging water. Evan grabbed another rock as a blue light began to glow around Betty, and something shimmered into existence.


    ¡°Oh no,¡± Evan said. ¡°Oh no, it can''t be. It couldn''t be. Life wouldn''t be so cruel.¡±


    ¡°It is!¡± Dr. Myrden cackled, jumping up and down, flapping his wings joyously. ¡°It certainly is! Well done girl, you have excellent taste!¡±


    Between the growing monster and the rest of them now stood...a duck. The duck was a pure white, so pure it almost glowed, cut with a few bands of tranquil ocean blue. She had what looked like a tiara of glistening blue gems on silver, and she carried a staff made in a similar way.


    ¡°Yes sorry about this,¡± she said. ¡°I didn''t have a lot of options at the time. Nice to meet you again, Betty. It''s me. Quakfina.¡±

 Chapter 37: Ducks of Unusual Quality

    Everyone stared dully at the regal looking duck preening herself on the ground in front of them.


    ¡°Quackfina!¡± Dr. Myrden said, waddling up to her. ¡°What are you doing here!? I figured you''d been banished somehow, but I couldn''t find you...¡±


    ¡°No, thanks to my contract with you escaping to a higher plane was no longer an option,¡± Quakfina said. ¡°But my contract had a clause that said I could leave if my goddess called me, or I chose to serve another master. Pretty stupid of me not to include a clause where I could just quit, but that''s summoning contracts for you.¡±


    ¡°Guys!¡± Evan said, pointing at the snarling mass of tentacles approaching them. ¡°Don''t we have bigger problems!?¡±


    ¡°Oh,¡± Quakfina said. ¡°Not really. Betty, would it be alright if I used some of your magic?¡±


    ¡°Why are you asking me?¡± Betty said.


    ¡°Well you are my contracted master now,¡± Quakfina said. ¡°Generally speaking, contracted spirits aren''t supposed to just do things.¡±


    ¡°Oh. Then yes, please. Go ahead.¡±


    ¡°Thank you,¡± Quakfina said. She waved her staff with the tip of a wing, and the water spirit disappeared. ¡°There we go! Back to the watery plane you summoned it from. That was very irresponsible Betty, I thought you were more level headed than that.¡±


    Moonlight appeared in the space beside them and meowed mourfully at Quakfina.


    ¡°Oh come now!¡± Quakfina said. ¡°I''m sure that can''t be right!¡±


    ¡°Meow.¡±


    ¡°Surely the phrase ¡°deranged maniac¡± is stretching things a little far....¡±


    ¡°Meow!¡±


    ¡°Wait wait wait wait!¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°Hold on a minute!¡±


    ¡°I thought you were happy about this,¡± Evan said.


    ¡°That was back when I thought this was just another duck spirit!¡± Dr. Myrden sputtered. In his current form, it came out as a series of thin quacks. ¡°This is Quakfina! The second most powerful spirit I ever summoned! How did you get her?¡±


    He glared at Betty, who just shrugged.


    ¡°I am curious about that myself,¡± Betty said.


    ¡°Well as I was trying to explain,¡± Quakfina huffed. ¡°When your children attacked me and seny us all plummeting from the sky...¡±


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    ¡°THEY WHAT!?¡± Dr. Myrden quack-sputtered again.


    ¡°You should really pay more attention to what they''ve been up too,¡± Quakfina scolded. ¡°Anyway, my contract with you meant I couldn''t just leave. I could only leave if I found a new master. And there happened to be someone standing right there with a water-attuned node I could hide in.¡±


    ¡°So that was where you went when you disappeared,¡± Betty said. ¡°I suppose I understand. Would it be correct to release you from your contract now? You could be free.¡±


    ¡°No I don''t think so,¡± Quakfina shook her head. ¡°I''ve been inside your soul for a while now, and I have been quite fond of what I saw in there. I am interested in you, and would like to continue as your spirit inside your water node.¡±


    ¡°Thank you,¡± Betty said. Woman and duck stared at each other for a moment.


    ¡°Well I suppose that solves that,¡± Quakfina said


    ¡°It does not!¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°Betty, do you have any idea what she is!?¡±


    ¡°Is she a demon or some other form of evil entity who will attempt to gain control of my body?¡± Betty asked.


    ¡°What? No!¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°But we''re talking about a level of power here...¡±


    ¡°More powerful than a genie?¡± Betty asked.


    ¡°Well...no,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°Yes. Maybe. Is. It depends.¡±


    ¡°Oh she can''t access a tenth of my power yet,¡± Quakfina said. ¡°Besides, I''m here to guide her in learning how to use my power, so when she does have access to more of it she''ll know what she''s doing.¡±


    ¡°Meow.¡±


    ¡°Really?¡± Betty asked. ¡°Just having her in the node makes your water form more powerful?¡±


    ¡°Meow!¡± Moonlight said happily, rubbing his forehead against Quakfina.


    ¡°Ah. Yes. This is very strange, now that I''m duck sized. But you are a nice cat.¡±


    ¡°Mrow.¡±


    ¡°You are effectively a cat.¡± Quakfina said, patting him on the head.


    Dr. Myrden huffed and looked between Betty, Moonlight, and Quakfina.


    ¡°Okay,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°The other training groups are giving me their own special brand of misery, so I''m going to call this good enough. Quakfina, you can take over teaching Betty how to use her water node?¡±


    ¡°I can,¡± Quakfina nodded.


    ¡°Okay good,¡± Dr. Myrden said, turning his attention to Evan. ¡°That means I can focus all my energy on you.¡±


    ¡°Great,¡± Evan said. ¡°Wonderful. Hooray for me.¡±


    ¡°None of that,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°Okay, let''s see you focus. You will master focus.¡±


    ¡°Great,¡± Evan grumbled. ¡°Betty gets a magical super duck to play with. I get to stare at a rock. How is that fair?¡±


    ¡°Magic''s pretty fair,¡± Dr. Myrden said. ¡°You get what your talent and your training will give you, when it comes to powers. Oh, and your soul of course. You can choose all you want, but in the end the shape your powers take will be determined by the nature of your soul.¡±


    ¡°Ahah,¡± Evan said. ¡°So should I read anything into the fact that Kyle''s powers are in the shape of a gorgeous woman he is now sleeping with...¡±


    ¡°Enough of that!¡± Dr. Myrden waved his cane at him.


    ¡°I''m just saying that''s some pretty bone deep narcissism right there.¡±


    ¡°That''s an entirely different situation!¡± Dr Myrden huffed. ¡°A bond with a magical creature, she''s not actually born from his powers. Although what you''re talking about has been known to happen.¡±


    ¡°Seriously!?¡± Evan dropped his rock.


    ¡°You dropped your rock.¡±


    ¡°How am I to focus on rocks when you tell me that!?¡±


    ¡°Magic is all about weird,¡± Dr. Myrden told him. ¡°And people get really weird. Now come on focus.¡±


    ¡°Why a rock?¡± Evan said, looking over. ¡°Betty is still damp, maybe I can focus on...¡±


    ¡°Do you think about anything else?¡±


    ¡°It''s more interesting than a rock.¡±


    ¡°Aren''t you supposed to have a girlfriend? I''m not up on all the drama going on.¡±


    ¡°It''s...yeah,¡± Evan sighed. ¡°I just can''t stop thinking about if things had been different.¡±


    ¡°I can understand that,¡± and for once Dr. Myrden''s voice was soft and kind. ¡°Any old man understands that. But that Goldie looks like trouble when she''s mad.¡±


    ¡°Yeah,¡± Evan smiled. ¡°Yeah she is.¡±


    ¡°Sounds to me like you''re safer with the rock. Get back to it.¡±

 Chapter 38: Ducks of Mystic Wonder

    Tanya...wasn''t really training. Or she was training, but not herself.


    What she was doing was sitting on the floor, teaching Goldie baby magic.


    Actually, quite literally baby magic. Her father, in duck form, had handed her the spellbook he''d started teaching her when she was in preschool and then sat down to read. It was interesting, watching her father read as a duck. The book was actually bigger than he was, and even though she''d been training in magic since she was a child, she was having trouble figuring out how he turned the pages with his wings. She was pretty sure he wasn''t using telekinesis, or making little invisible human fingers. It was almost like he was actually using his feathers somehow...


    ¡°Dammit!¡± Goldie hissed. ¡°This is hard!¡±


    She was supposed to be summoning a small, circular light and holding it for thirty seconds. Tanya had done it by accident before she got the book. And she had to admit, she was getting a little frustrated that Goldie couldn''t do it.


    It wasn''t just that Goldie''s magic was low. Goldie actually had higher magic than the average person, to be able to create those sparks of magic between her fingers at all. It was the rest of her friends who were the weird ones, which was probably Kyle''s fault. Him and his wish. No, she couldn''t complain about that, but Tanya was getting very frustrated with how long it was taking Goldie to get this stupid, simple, basic spell.


    Another flash of light, and a fizzling sound.


    ¡°Dammit!¡± Goldie complained.


    ¡°Let''s try this,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Instead of pushing the magic out, just kind of...let it go. I think you might be forcing it.¡±


    ¡°Forcing it,¡± Goldie said. ¡°Yeah. Sure. I didn''t even believe magic existed a couple of weeks ago.¡±


    ¡°That''s true,¡± Tanya said, feeling a little guilty for how harsh she was being. ¡°I hadn''t even thought about that. I was raised in all this.¡±


    ¡°I mean fair,¡± Goldie said. ¡°It''s normal for you. Like someone who grew up in...I dunno, the film industry. It''s all normal as far as you''re concerned.¡±


    ¡°Alright try again,¡± Tanya said. ¡°Let it flow. Don''t force it.¡±


    ¡°Right,¡± Goldie said. ¡°Don''t force it.¡±


    Goldie held her hands up again, and this time the light grew smoother, steadier, softer...and then just as smoothly and steadily and softly faded away and disappeared.


    ¡°That''s progress!¡± Tanya said, forcing a smile. She felt bad for having to force it. It was progress. She''d definitely been closer...but they''d still been working on this same, simple, easy spell...for over an hour.


    ¡°I failed better?¡± Goldie smirked.


    ¡°Exactly!¡± Tanya said. ¡°Keep at it, I''m going to go check something with my dad.¡±


    ¡°Okay,¡± Goldie said, turning back to her spell as Tanya walked over to where the bearded duck sat reading.


    ¡°No,¡± the duck told her before she even said a word.


    ¡°There must be something I can be doing!¡± She said desperately. ¡°I don''t mind training Goldie, but I''m not working on my own magic at all.¡±


    ¡°That''s what you think,¡± Her father said, turning the page.


    ¡°How are you doing that!?¡± She demanded.


    ¡°Can''t tell?¡± He looked up at her. ¡°Then that''s proof you need more training.¡±


    ¡°Then train me!¡±


    You might be reading a pirated copy. Look for the official release to support the author.


    ¡°I am,¡± he said. ¡°It''s not my fault you''re a bad student.¡±


    ¡°I''m not a bad student!¡± She hissed.


    ¡°Are you suggesting Goldie is?¡±


    ¡°No of course not,¡± Tanya sighed. ¡°She''s doing amazing, for how late she started. But I''m not training anything at all.¡±


    ¡°Yes you are,¡± he said, turning back to his book.


    ¡°I cannot believe this,¡± she said. ¡°I came here, I insisted you pay me some personal attention, I was pretty eloquent about it I thought...¡±


    ¡°Tanya I am,¡± he said. ¡°I am giving you personal, private coaching. The best training you can do right now. And I''m telling you that helping her master basic training spells is the very best thing you can be doing for your magic right now.¡±


    ¡°I...¡± Tanya threw her hands up. ¡°Okay.¡±


    She turned and sat back down across from Goldie.


    ¡°Problems with dad?¡± Goldie asked.


    ¡°Kind of always,¡± Tanya muttered.


    ¡°I....kind of get it?¡± Goldie said. ¡°I kind of don''t. My parent''s aren''t around much, and that kinda sucks sometimes. But they have important jobs, and I see them often enough. I saw them a lot more when I was younger.¡±


    ¡°I know the feeling,¡± Tanya said. ¡°I mean, I get it. Our family is descended from Merling...¡±


    ¡°Wait,¡± Goldie said. ¡°THE Merlin?¡±


    ¡°Yes the actual Merlin,¡± Tanya sighed. ¡°Who was real, and so was the table and the knights and all that stuff. But more importantly, for this discussion, is that we''ve got obligations dating back thousands of years. And because we''re so powerful, we have a responsibility to help protect people, and clean up magical messes. And all that''s important. I get it.¡±


    ¡°But it means he''s never around,¡± Goldie said.


    ¡°And when he is around he''s a duck,¡± Tanya groaned.


    ¡°Yeah my family issues never involved waterfowl,¡± Goldie admitted. ¡°That''s a first for me, I''ve got to admit. Hey, what''s with all the ducks?¡±


    ¡°Oh, it''s a whole thing,¡± Tanya sighed. ¡°Basically, there''s a whole bunch of different branches of Merlin''s magic just kind of lying around, and everyone in the family is supposed to take one up. Dad decided to use a ritual Merlin invented to make a pack with the goddess Seq....hey!¡±


    She pointed to the soft, smooth, calmly glowing sphere between Goldie''s hands.


    ¡°You did it!¡±


    ¡°I did it!¡±


    ¡°Oh my god you did it!¡±


    ¡°Oh my god I did it!¡±


    Tanya and Goldie both laughed. Goldie separated her hands, and the orb came with her left hand. She tossed it into her right like a marble, then back and forth.


    ¡°I guess I was just overthinking it,¡± she said.


    ¡°I guess so,¡± Tanya said.


    ¡°Hey can I do it again?¡± Goldie held the glowing ball of light in her right hand and held her left out, palm up, and another orb of light appeared there. ¡°Hey cool!¡±


    She started juggling the tiny balls of light.


    ¡°You can juggle?¡± Tanya laughed.


    ¡°Yeah I can,¡± Goldie said. ¡°But I''m not usually this good. Hey wait a minute...these things aren''t falling! They''re coming down because I''m thinking about them coming down, aren''t they?¡±


    ¡°Uhhh...yeah,¡± Tanya scratched her head. ¡°Now that you mention it, yeah. I think that''s how it would work.¡±


    ¡°Which explains how I''m catching them so easily every time,¡± Goldie said. ¡°But I bet if I just let them go...¡±


    She tossed both balls into the air and they floated randomly.


    ¡°Hey that''s cool!¡± Goldie said, a huge smile across her face. ¡°I did it! My first actual real honest to goodness magic spell!¡±


    ¡°You did!¡± Tanya said. ¡°And you seem really compatible with it.¡±


    ¡°I dunno how I feel,¡± Goldie said. ¡°I''m...excited. My mom likes to say she''s Jazzed. I just...¡±


    Laughing, Goldie jumped to her feet and held her hands out at her sides. She started spinning around, and from her palms floated hundred of little points of light, in dozens of colors, floating through the air like sparkling snow until Tanya and Goldie stood under a swirling, spreading galaxy of magical light. Goldie was too lost in her wonder to pay attention to anything else.


    Tanya was falling down a rabbit hole of confusion.


    Not at how quickly Goldie had mastered the spell. It was a baby spell after all, of course she got a handle on it quickly once she''d actually done it. No, what was confusing her was the spell itself. It made sense. Sure, of course you could change the color of the light spheres. That just made sense, it was a little tweak to your magic. Not much more than imagining it true, so simple that just by imagining it true Goldie had made it happen. But She''d never thought of it. And...yes, some of the lights were brighter and dimmer, and some were different sizes. They were still perfectly formed, so Tanya didn''t think it was a mistake...no, again, it was a simple little tweak to the spell, simple enough for Goldie to do subconsciously.


    She''s brand new to this, Tanya realized. I''d never think to fool around with a baby spell like this. But she doesn''t know any better. And come to think of it, if you can change it like this, then you could...


    The idea for the new spell clicked into place, as did her father''s lesson.


    I''ve been inflexible. Rigid. I''ve been following the rulebook too closely. I haven''t been improvising with the magic enough. That''s what he''s trying to teach me.


    She very carefully did not look back. She knew her father''s smug expression all too well, she had zero interest in seeing it on a duck.


    ¡°This is great!¡± Goldie said. ¡°What''s the next spell?¡±


    ¡°I don''t remember,¡± Tanya said, grabbing the book. ¡°It''s been a long time since I did these exercises. Let''s see. I''m excited to find out.¡±

 Chapter 39: Ducks of Creeping Menace

    Training arcs are all well and good, but they do have a tendency to take over. If you feel like we have left a few plot threads dangling you would not be wrong, and it''s high time we got back to them. The first of those we need to discuss is Benny Gold, who has spent the past few days recovering in a hospital and trying to understand the world. Something had been made especially difficult, because he knew things nobody else seemed to.


    Oh, don''t be mistaken. Everyone else knew more than he did. About Danny''s rampage, about the bombs he''d apparently left all over town. Bad enough for the feds to set up shop in town, just down the street from the hospital. He''d gotten a good description of what had happened the night of the dance. Some cops had come around to ask him about it, too, but they hadn''t been too interested. Benny had been knocked unconscious, and several witnesses described him as being horrified by Danny''s original outburst when he''d been knocked unconscious. So that should have been it...


    But.


    But there was that weird guy who''d been there right when he woke up. Taliesin Cromlaire. Even fuddled from just waking up from a coma, it wasn''t an easy name to forget. Nor was it an easy man. The strange man had showed up, asking questions about Danny, and disappeared. Questions having something to do with an efreet. Benny had taken the time to look up that word, later on, and what he''d found was ¡°a powerful demon and spirit of fire in Islamic culture.¡± It had not missed Benny''s notice that Danny was accused of firebombingthe town.


    And then there was the government. The federal agents had paid them a visit too. They''d been weirdly vague about what agency they were actually from, although they''d showed extremely official looking badges. And they''d asked a lot of questions about Danny, too. Benny had been...evasive. He wondered if they could tell. He''d played up his confusion after the concussion, and he''d also told them a lot of the truth. He''d been asleep through all of it, no idea what Danny was up to. If he''d known he''d have tried to stop it.


    Which was, all in all, true. Ultimately, while Benny had been a bully most of his life, he lacked the ground-in evil of a Danny O''Brien. Untested, his soul had drifted sideways into the murky gray. While it did not necessarily make up for a lifetime of petty cruelty, a fair evaluation of Benny''s character should take into account that his last act before going into his coma had been attempting to savethe same people he''d always picked on.


    He had, however, left out a few things talking to the feds.


    First, he''d left out Taliesin Cromlaire. The story sounded crazy anyway, but he had an eerie suspicion the lead woman, the one with the creepy eyes, would have believed him. It was her that put him on edge and made him cagey more than anything, and he''d decided to keep the story to himself for now. He could always go admit to it later. Probably. This of course also meant he''d left out any mention of efreets or demons or what have you.


    Second, he''d left out the thing he could do with his hands now.


    He looked around the hospital room, straining his ears as hard as he could to try and hear if there was anyone in the hall outside. His straining ears found nothing, so he turned his focus back to his hands. He held them up together, and concentrated. The thing that appeared between them looked like a sun made of golden lightning, crackling and spinning. He couldn''t keep it up for long, and he''d done it by accident the first time. But it came easier every time he did it, and he was pretty sure the crackling sun thing was getting bigger every time he tried it.


    He kept doing it, whenever people weren''t around. It was like poking at a sore tooth, or scratching at a rash. Because it was the constant reminder, the thing he could always look to, if he started to think it had all been a dream. That he had imagined Taliesin Cromlaire, that his weird feelings about the woman from the government had been nothing, that all his thoughts about fire demons from the middle east somewhere were delusions conjured by a brain that had taken so much damage it had needed to shut down for a while to repair.


    But the lightning was real. Tangible. Inarguable. And if that was real...anything else could be too. Danny really could have been working with a fire demon. Demons were as good a reason as any to explain Danny O''Brien. If he told the truth, Danny had always scared him a little. So why couldn''t he be in league with the boogeyman?


    Except, of course, whoever Danny had been working with probably wasn''t the real boogeyman. In fact, every time he tried to conjure the word the image that came to mind was Taliesin Cromlaire. Creepy bastard. Whatever was going on, he was right in the middle of it. And, unfortunately, so was Benny.


    The tale has been illicitly lifted; should you spot it on Amazon, report the violation.


    He stared into the crackling ball of lightning again. Whatever was going on had somehow touched him too. And he couldn''t shake the feeling that was going to mean a lot of trouble, and a lot of danger, in his life all at the same time. He had to do something. He just didn''t have any idea what. He was still pondering the question when something shook the entire building, and glass from his window peppered into the room.


    Dark eyes watched the explosion from a distance. Too far a distance, you would think, yo make out any details. But by now you''ve probably figured out that you can''t judge capabilities, skills, age, or even appendages by the human norm. The watcher in the darkness could clearly make out everything that was going on in the vicinity of her little production. Now all she had to do was wait until the cast showed up and see who''d get on the stage...


    Or something. She wasn''t proud of that metaphor. Whatever, she wasn''t a writer, she didn''t have to be embarrassed by the nonsense garbage words she came up with.


    And she didn''t have time to think about it anymore, because someone had shown up. A bulky figure in a hospital gown had just jumped out of the hospital window and landed amid the chaos. From the third floor.


    I knew it! The watcher thought triumphantly. I knew Benny Gold knew more than he was saying!


    One suspicion confirmed, which was more than enough of a thread to start picking at. Especially if he survived. If he died, well, less ideal but there was still plenty the watcher could investigate.


    Benny had no idea what possessed him to jump out his broken hospital window into an explosion.


    Into a green explosion. It looked like fire and smoke, but it was all green. And glowing. Not in a way that made him think of radiation, he''d heard that wasn''t really green anyway. In a way that him think of witches. And spells. And general magic.


    And fire demons.


    It didn''t quite click that the fall should kill him until he''d already landed, his feet leaving cracks in the pavement. That, he knew, was not normal. Not any more normal than the glowing green smoke and the explosion. But then he''d already known things weren''t normal. And that he wasn''t normal. The real questions was why the hell had he jumped out the window in the first place!?


    Some instinct. The same one that had sent him flying between Kyle Anderman and a bullet. It was, all things considered, a stupid instinct that was likely to get him killed. An impression which only grew stronger when from within the bellowing smoke came the angriest tree he had ever seen. It was twelve feet tall, at least, with branches growing out of it''s hulking shoulders. It had a face made from ugly holes in gnarled wood, and it''s limbs branched off at the end like roots.


    Okay! Benny said. Convincing myself magic is real over the last couple of days did not prepare me for this! What the hell do I do now?


    It had no eyes in ragged holes in the wood that made up his face, but he could still tell the moment it noticed him from the tilt of it''s leafy head. It stomped towards him, and Benny experienced a moment of crisis.


    It was a rare, rare thing that Benny wasn''t the biggest guy in the room. He was even bigger than Danny, but he''d deferred to Danny because, well...


    Because on some instinctive level, Danny had scared him. He''d recognized someone stronger, mentally if not physically, and bowed down. Never mind he was apparently unstable, he''d been stronger, and Benny had acted accordingly.


    There was, of course, no way to pledge his loyalty to the thing stomping towards the hospital. And in the end, when people had been about to get really hurt, he''d even stood up to Danny O''Brian. That same quality of his mind and soul pushed him to stand up to the tree. Raising a fist, he charged at it. It was a brilliant moment of self discovery, a triumph of the natural good that dwells within the human spirit.


    It was not, unfortunately, a victory for Benny Gold, who was swatted aside like a fly and sent careening across the hospital parking lot. He slammed into a parked car, shattering it, and learning in the process that whatever was going on with him it had not made him invulnerable. He thought something was broken in his back, and there were definitely shards of windshield sticking in him.


    Well that was stupid, he thought, his head swimming. He couldn''t see the thing anymore, only hear it stomping around. Not near him, although it hardly mattered. He had a sneaking suspicion he might be dying. Or maybe worse, going into a coma again. The world above him was filled with the glowing green smoke of the explosion.


    And then, suddenly, it was awash with gold.


    He tilted his head and floating in the air in front of him was...a bird. Or almost a bird. It was more like a rough picture of a bird, with a rough brown color inside hard, black outlines. It''s wings were splayed out and the lines of the thing were stiff, all except for the eye in the center of its back. The eye moved quickly and fluidly, turning down towards him.


    Interesting, a voice echoed in his mind.


    ¡°Sure,¡± Benny mumbled. ¡°Why not.¡±


    Mmm. You are injured, so I will forgive you.


    ¡°Great, thanks.¡±


    Hmph. I''ll expect you to be properly grateful when next we meet. Until then...good luck, descendant, with what strength I can offer you.


    The eye flashed, and the light flowed from it like golden liquid, pouring down from the sky into Benny''s body. He felt warm. No, no he felt...he felt like he was on fire. In a good way. A great way. He leaped up from the ruins of the broken car, shaking his head. He didn''t have time to think about how weird everything was. He had to go! He had to move!


    As he ran towards the tree creature again, his fist raised, he didn''t notice his body now looked like it was painted in softly glowing gold. Any more than he noticed the image of a bird, minus the staring eye, that had appeared on the forearm of his raised fist.

 Chapter 40: Ducks Divine and Mighty

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    The tree thing was taking it''s time getting to the hospital. What it seemed really eager to do was cause destruction, and there were plenty of sheds, ambulances, and cars in the parking lot for it to smash through. Benny didn''t even consider his furious charge, just ran in with his fist raised and punched it across the face. Honestly he should have found that part odd all by itself, since before he hadn''t even been able to get close to it. But it finally occurred to him something was weird when his punch not only sent the tree creature flying, it cracked the wood across its face and down it''s twisted, gnarled neck.


    ¡°Hey,¡± Benny said. ¡°I don''t think I could do that before...oh crap!¡±


    Whether he could or could not have done that before, what he could now, indisputably, was get the big tree beasts'' attention. It clambered to it''s feet in a flailing tangle of branchy limbs and stomped in his direction. Benny went with his first instinct to run away, but something stopped him. And he didn''t mean he just had a feeling like he shouldn''t, or he reconsidered. It was like something inside his body rebelled at the thought.


    Which was weird, since it also seemed not too fond of the thought of rebellion, as a general concept.


    Still, he turned back to face the oncoming tree monster. It swung for him, but this time he caught it''s club-hand with his forearm and threw it aside, punching it in the...gut? Did trees have guts? They didn''t have a stomach or intestines...of course they didn''t usually have faces, either. And even when they did they didn''t stomp around and roar as a general rule.


    Benny was thinking about random things to distract himself from the fact that whatever else was going on somehow, for some reason he could not understand, he was suddenly stronger than the tree.


    But to hell with it. He was trying to protect the hospital, right? Might as well make use of it. Maybe he could get rid of it. He grabbed it by the...chest? Sure, let''s go with chest, and tried to throw it. That didn''t work out so well. Just because he was strong enough to haul the thing around didn''t mean it was light, and a tree with branches and limbs at odd angles is pretty unwieldy to throw, and it doesn''t get any easier when those limbs are flailing angrily around. He got it a couple of feet.


    He rushed it while it was getting up and started punching it away from the hospital as best he could gradually pushing it away. The creature roared and burbled, but he''d gotten enough stronger that there wasn''t much it could do about it. Of course, Benny was also discovering there wasn''t much he could do to the tree either. Sure, his punches split wood and shattered bark, but there was always a waft of green glowing smoke and the whole thing healed up again. It felt like this fight could go on forever.


    Part of him almost didn''t mind. It felt like he could go on forever. Like getting tired or worn out was something that happened to other people. Still, it did occur to him that there were other things he would want to do, eventually, than engage a tree monster in a perpetual battle. He was just wishing for someone he could ask for advice when that very thing popped out of the bushes...in the form of that creepy woman from the government. The one with the impossible hourglass figure, who didn''t move right.


    He wasn''t so sure he was glad to see her, especially once she started talking.


    ¡°Hey kid!¡± She said. ¡°Good work! But you can''t keep pushing him this way, you''re gonna put him outside the perimeter.¡±


    ¡°What perimeter?¡± Benny demanded, planting his fist in roaring oaken face again.


    ¡°The one we put up around this whole mess,¡± government woman said. ¡°Gotta keep this whole thing a secret. We''ve got specialists coming in who can kill the tree, just keep it busy until they show up. And move it away from the edge of the perimeter!¡±


    ¡°Back towards the hospital?¡±


    ¡°No you should probably protect the hospital,¡± she said with an irritating shrug. ¡°Oh, and when this is over we''re going to have a real conversation about what happened with Danny O''Brian, and after. You''ve been lying to your government kid. But save the hospital and I think we''ll call it even.¡±


    ¡°Oh thank you!¡± Benny snapped sarcastically. Alright, alright, fine. He''d been too suspicious to go to them before, but if they had specialists who dealt with this kind of thing they probably had answers too, about what the hell was happening. All he had to do was keep the tree thing busy...and away from the perimeter. He did not want to find out what the government had set up at the perimeter, so he changed directions.


    Stolen from Royal Road, this story should be reported if encountered on Amazon.


    What do you do with a tree monster? Plant it. Sounded logical. So instead of back towards the hospital, or further towards the perimeter, he started punching down. Burying the thing in the dirt with blow after blow. It snarled and screamed, but as the soft earth started to pile on top of it it quieted, it''s struggles stilling, until it wasn''t moving underneath him at all. Benny realized belatedly that he''d buried himself, as well, so he crawled out of the dirt and collapsed on top of the heap. The woman walked up to stand beside him.


    ¡°Hey nice work!¡± She said. ¡°I think you killed it! We''ll wait for the experts though. I''ve never fought a treant before. I''d shake you hand, but you know. You''re covered in dirt and I''m wearing a very nice suit.¡±


    ¡°Why does your voice sound like that?¡± He said. ¡°Like you''re purring all the time. It sends shivers up my spine.¡±


    ¡°Thanks, but you''re a little young for me kid.¡±


    ¡°That''s not what I...¡±


    ¡°Julia Nunez,¡± she said. ¡°Special agent. My agency doesn''t have a name.¡±


    ¡°You handle all the spooky shit,¡± Benny said. ¡°I figured that much out myself.¡±


    ¡°We do indeed handle all the spooky shit!¡± she said. ¡°Well done! I actually heard we were originally...hold that thought, I need to take this call. Yeah? Hey! You can hold off on the rush, I think the kid handled it. Oh, a person of interest with active nodes he will be explaining to me in the very near future. Yeah, it was pretty cool to watch he punched it over and over until he buried it in the dirt. You what? Yeah, I said...oh, alright. I''ll tell him.¡±


    She turned to look at Benny.


    ¡°My druid guys are telling me that was actually a really bad idea.¡±


    She both did not have time to elaborate and did not need it, because at that moment a horrifying mass of branches and tendrils exploded from the ground beneath them, towering over the hospital. In the center of it was the tree monsters face, grown horrifically, screaming and howling as it lashed out at everything around. Nunez dodged the lashing branches nimbly, but even with his newfound powers Benny was anything but nimble. The tree caught him, and he learned the answer to a question.


    He''d wondered, all fight, whether he was beating up a helpless scared animal. Vegetable. Whatever. If the creature actually had a will of its own, or if it was just following its instincts in the wrong environment, resulting in destruction. The old King Kong problem. Actually it was unethical wildlife handling practices that killed the beast.


    Now he could safely say no. No, it was not just an animal. It had the capacity to hate. It had the capacity to seek revenge. And it had a sense of irony, because it sought revenge by lifting Benny up and beating him viciously against the ground, over and over and over, until he was being buried in the dirt. Then it ground into him, roots growing over and around his body.


    As it buried him Benny got a few flashes. Agent Nunez...moving. Her movements did not look human. He could only make out shadows, but they looked like something else...and so much more natural for her. Also, whenever the branches got close to her she did something to them, and they shattered. Her not being a human didn''t shock him too much, considering the day, but it did raise the question of what exactly she was.


    All of which was secondary to the question of how he was going to survive this, because as he was learning the very hard way whatever strange power he''d found didn''t make it so he didn''t have to breath. He struggled and fought under the roots, even snapping them, but more and more grew in, burying him deeper until all light was lost and he began to black out. His vision went dark.


    And in the dark, pictures. Words. Both. Hieroglyphs. Egyptian hieroglyphs. What the actual hell...


    Read it! A voice screamed inside his mind.


    He thought of telling the voice he couldn''t read hieroglyphs, but honestly at this point it just seemed silly. Without any trouble, he read the inscription.


    ¡°He whom victory was forged as he came from the womb,¡±


    Strength surged inside him, and he shrugged off the roots confining him and made his way to the surface.


    ¡°Whom valor was given while in the egg!¡±


    He burst from the dirt into the chaos of the screaming, roaring plant creature, the eerie shadow of Agent Nunez darting barely seen between the angry branches and destroying them as it passed.


    ¡°But firm of heart as he treads the arena!¡±


    Benny charged ahead through the branches, into the center mass of the creature, grabbing its enormous face by the top and bottom jaw.


    ¡°Godly king going forth like Montu on the victory day!¡±


    And with that last defiant bellow, the lightning flowed from his fingers again. It formed a shape, the shape of an enormous bird, that burst forth until it towered over the town like a second sun, tearing every piece of the plant monster apart as it passed, reducing it to chunks of wood and falling sawdust. Benny collapsed on his ass, panting heavily, not even noticing his skin losing the golden hue it had grown before. Agent Nunez landed beside him, slipping her sunglasses back on and fixing her hair.


    ¡°I''ll say it again, pretty good kid. I think you really got it this time.¡±


    ¡°Yeah uh...¡± Benny shook his head. ¡°Do your eyes....did I just see them glowing green?¡±


    ¡°Not gonna answer that. Got any questions I can answer?¡±


    ¡°Yeah,¡± Benny said. ¡°Who the hell is Montu?¡±


    ¡°No idea whatsoever,¡± she shrugged. ¡°Could be a god.¡±


    ¡°A god,¡± Benny nodded. ¡°Right. Yeah.¡±


    ¡°You owe me some answers,¡± she pointed at him.


    ¡°You owe me some,¡± he came back. ¡°But uh, I just fought a giant tree monster and maybe talked to a god and I''m kinda supposed to be in the hospital right now so uhhhhhh I''m gonna pass out.¡±


    He fell back against the dirt, unconscious.

 Chapter 41: Ducks Among the Stars

    Kyle and Jenny lay together underneath a tree, their clothes drying out over the fire beside them. They wore t-shirts and sweatpants borrowed from Tanya, sorry this is isn''t going to be one of those chapters. But they were certainly feeling that kind of way, cuddled up and cozy under a blanket. It was the fact that everyone else was just a stones throw away that kept their hands mostly out of trouble. Jenny rested her head on Kyle''s shoulder, looking up at the stars.


    ¡°I wonder which constellation is a duck,¡± she said.


    ¡°Oh not that,¡± Kyle sighed. ¡°No more ducks today.¡±


    Even Tanya''s father had given up on the ducks for the time being, back in his human form. The only one still focused on ducks was Betty, who was holding some kind of tea party between her cat and her new duck in an attempt to help them get along better. Kyle wondered how it was going, but not enough to call across the clearing. And definitely not enough to get out from under a nice warm blanket with his nice warm girlfriend under it.


    ¡°Alright no ducks,¡± she said. ¡°What did you think of the training?¡±


    ¡°It''s all wet,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°That''s horrible.¡±


    ¡°No it''s dry wit, so it''s actually a double pun.¡±


    ¡°Is this what I can expect in the modern era? Puns?¡±


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    ¡°And lots of them,¡± Kyle sighed. ¡°You know, you asked me if I regretted summoning you...but I never asked if you regretted being summoned.


    ¡°What?¡± Jenny gasped.


    ¡°Don''t be like that, it''s a legitimate question. This has all been a huge change. And now your soul is stapled directly to mine, and you''re living in a strange world...¡±


    ¡°A wonderful world,¡± Jenny said. ¡°I know that''s not popular to say. And I won''t say there aren''t things I don''t miss about my time, when magic was more common and there were dragons and street corner magicians everywhere. But the places you have advanced...the things any ordinary person can have without magic are incredible. And I know you don''t always do it perfectly, but you''re a lot better at things like, I dunno, not jailing people because their horns are the wrong shape.¡±


    ¡°Nobody has horns anymore,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°You know what I mean. Overall, things in this time are a lot better. Of course maybe things in my time were a lot better than before too. Maybe we''re always getting better, we just don''t notice it because we have to deal with the problems we have right now.¡±


    ¡°This is getting deeper than I expected,¡± Kyle said. ¡°Maybe I should have stuck with the ducks.¡±


    ¡°Hey Dr. Myrden!¡± Jenny called across the fire. ¡°Is there a duck constellation?¡±


    He pointed to the sky.


    ¡°Wild Duck Cluster,¡± he said. ¡°It''s part of a constellation called the scutum.¡±


    ¡°The what?¡± Evan laughed.


    ¡°It means shield you deranged pervert!¡± Dr. Myrden shouted, and Goldie slapped him on the back of the head.


    ¡°Look what you started,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°Oh no,¡± Jenny grinned. ¡°I take no responsibility for this. This is all your fault.¡±


    They lay in silence for a moment.


    ¡°I wish we weren''t training to fight,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°Me too,¡± Jenny said. ¡°That it could all be nights like this, cuddled up and looking at the stars. Or watching anime. I miss that Garden one.¡±


    ¡°Well if nothing else school starts up in a few weeks,¡± he sighed. ¡°College. That''ll be an experience.¡±


    ¡°Yeah!¡± She said. ¡°We can start school together! And maybe we won''t have a problem. Maybe we can just live quiet lives from here on out.¡±


    You have probably noticed by now that this installment of their adventures is shorter than most, and there''s a reason for that. Because this moment itself is brief, and fleeting. Back in town the government is already cleaning up the debris of a crazed treant attack, the hospital parking lot lies in smoking ruins. Their next enemy has already arrived, and already drawn blood.


    But for tonight let them lie back against the grass, and look into the stars, and dream of days of peace.

 Chapter 42: Loose Lips Sink Ducks

    The Shades headquarters in Rolling Hills was still a makeshift operation. They had plenty of experience setting up temporary field offices, but this had been a much more rapid transition than most. And eventually this wasn''t going to be a temporary field office. The presence of the last genie deserved a permanent presence. And very serious, very careful watching over. She seemed nice enough, and so did the young man she was bonded to, but that was still a lot of potential magical danger all in one spot. Magical danger which had erupted in town just a short while ago, the cleanup was still going on, and was only likely to get worse.


    Especially after what the young man in the other room had told her, before falling back asleep.


    Taliesin Cromlaire.


    The most wanted wizard in the world probably wasn''t in the sleepy little town of rolling hills. That giant tree wasn''t his style, he didn''t favor natural magic at all. But he''d been sniffing around, and there was no way this was a coincidence. The treant had been sent to target Benny Gold because they thought he must be connected, and they couldn''t find anyone else. Which didn''t mean they wouldn''t find the others involved, no matter how secret and exclusive. Myrden''s little hideaway camp was. So she had to warn them. But warning them was dangerous all by itself.


    She stood in a room full of desks and looked around at everyone.


    ¡°Full security check,¡± she said. People began furiously typing on consoles. A few moments later, they started giving her their reports.


    ¡°No electronic listening devices detected on the premises.¡±


    ¡°No magical artifacts not listed in inventory detected.¡±


    ¡°No signs of magical creatures not listed on staff.¡±


    ¡°No signs of scrying, divination, or other spying enchantments.¡±


    ¡°Security cameras show no intruders or null facial recognition contacts.¡±


    ¡°Heartbeat sensors detect only the individuals meant to be in the building.¡±


    ¡°No signs of a stealth or invisibility spell, check one.¡±


    ¡°No signs of a stealth or invisibility spell, check two.¡±


    ¡°No signs of a stealth or invisibility spell, check three.¡±


    Nunez nodded.


    ¡°Good work. Back to what you were doing.¡±


    The agents returned to their work. Security checks weren''t exactly uncommon, this was a secret government operation after all. And for the same reason, even if it had been strange they all knew not to ask questions. Nunez, on the other hand, focused on her own task.


    This base was new, and slapped together at the last minute. She did not have all the security measures in place she would like to have. But still, every scan came up negative. And it was highly unlikely that anyone could have gotten through three layers of magical stealth detection. Still, she took further precautions.


    Once she was alone in her office, she stomped to her desk to pull out a golden bowl and a brass coin. She spun the coin in the bottom of the bowl and chanted a few mumbling words. The coin caught fire as it spun, and as the smoke wafted into the room she felt a sense of peace. Isolation. Safety. As if a wall of soft cotton stood between her and anything that could harm her...or more importantly, listen in.


    The last security measure was that she was the only one who actually knew where Myrden and the kids were. That wasn''t agency information, just her information. Well, not quite the last. The phone she made the call with wasn''t the one on her desk, it was one she pulled from a secret drawer that looked like it was made of crystal.


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    ¡°Myrden?¡± She said. ¡°Yeah yeah, you''re up to your ass in teenagers...okay, young adults. Look I don''t have time to argue, Benny Gold was holding out on us. He got a visit right after he woke up from Taliesin Cromlaire. Oh, got your attention now? Good. You need to be careful. I don''t know who they are, but they attacked the hospital to try and flush us out. That''s why I''m contacting you like this, so they can''t track it. I''ll be honest, I''d prefer to have you and the kids back here. Concentrate our strength.¡±


    And let me watch over that genie personally before things go all to shit, she didn''t say out loud.


    ¡°I know they''re still training but...alright. Alright. But if they keep causing a mess here I''m going to have to call in reinforcements. And the last thing we want is Uzbedi attention.¡±


    She hung up the crystal phone and leaned back in her chair. She did not want to deal with this right now.


    ¡°You know it''s funny,¡± a voice she''d never heard before said. ¡°You spend so much time fighting us, but you don''t like the Uzbedis any more than we do.¡±


    Nunez was up, whirling around with her hands raised in a fighting stance, before the voice got to the end of the word ¡°funny.¡±


    ¡°Who''s there!?¡± She demanded.


    ¡°Me!¡± the voice giggled. It was feminine, and there was a childish lilt to the tone and chosen words, but the voice was too deep to be a child. ¡°I''m over here! Behind you! No, the otherbehind you!¡±


    The voice giggled as Nunez whirled back and forth.


    ¡°Oh fine I''ll come out! You suck at this game.¡±


    A woman rose out of Nunez''s shadow. She had pale skin and wore a leather outfit. Not tight, shiny leather meant to be erotic, though she''d definitely chosen clothes that hugged her figure, this was the worn beaten leather of something meant to be functional. It covered her from neck to ankles. Her hair and fingernails were both green, and her hair hung down in drooping spikes that suggested leaves. There was green around her eyes as well, which could have been eyeshadow but Nunez thought was more likely to be some side effect of the woman''s magic.


    Whatever the hell that was.


    ¡°Hi!¡± The woman waved. ¡°Thanks for staying on the call long enough for me to trace it!¡±


    ¡°How the hell did you do that?¡± Nunez demanded.


    ¡°Oh it''s got a lot to do with the nature of shadows, the infinite dimensions that exist all around us, the horrible things that peek at us out of the dark at night...¡± the green haired woman waved her hand dismissively. ¡°You know, boring stuff. Basically your security checks people and their shadows as one thing, but they''re actually two. Or, like, infinity things. I just hid in one of the infinity things inside your shadow.¡±


    That...was not magic Nunez understood. In the back of her mind she resolved to get someone who knew about shadow magic on security.


    ¡°Pretty ballsy,¡± Nunez said out loud. ¡°Revealing yourself to me. Why not just take the information and sneak out?¡±


    ¡°Because I want to go right away, duh,¡± the woman rolled her eyes. ¡°And you''re not likely to leave the building. So I had to get out of your shadow, and you''re not distracted fighting a treant anymore. Besides, nobody here can stop me.¡±


    ¡°I can stop you.¡±


    ¡°No you can''t!¡± The woman laughed. ¡°That''s why you haven''t called an intruder alert yet. You''re not sure you can beat me if we fight. Well I''m gonna tell you a little secret: I''m way, waystronger than you think I am.¡±


    ¡°You''ll forgive me if I test that,¡± Nunez snarled, her fingers hooking into claws and a green glow seeping around the edges of her sunglasses.¡±


    ¡°Okay but if you''re gonna fuck around,¡± the green haired girl shrugged, ¡°you''re gonna have to find out.¡±


    The destruction of the old Winstead building, recently bought by a federal agency for their new headquarters, was eventually covered up as a gas explosion related to the one which had demolished most of the hospital parking lot the evening before. Eventually it lead to a complete overhaul of the city''s gas line system, since hadn''t there been a few gas explosions just before that crazy kid bombed the town? Not that this was another bombing! No, not at all.


    Most of the articles used the word ¡°miracle¡± when talking about the survivors. They didn''t have the specifics, or names, but it was a fact that only one or two people were seriously injured in the ¡°blast.¡± Most of the agents had survived with minimal injures. An unconscious Benny Gold had lived, and in fact slept, through the whole thing. Even Agent Nunez survived, though heavily injured. When she heard about those articles later, Nunez laughed.


    Because it had been no miracle which had saved them. Their attacker simply had better places to be, and didn''t really care about the agents in the building. She''d brushed them aside as an afterthought, the way you''d kick a pile of leaves out of your way on the sidewalk. She wanted to follow her magical phone trace to where Myrden was, and the kids, and the last genie.


    Unfortunately, all the careful security precautions backfired there. Because the only one who knew all of that was Nunez. And she didn''t regain consciousness until it was far too late.

 Chapter 43: Duck Hunter

    Back at the training camp, Tanya was finally getting a chance to show off.


    It was evening again, and things were winding down from another (very similar) day of training. Everyone had gathered once again around the campfire, and Tanya was flexing her new muscles. Magical muscles, of course. Flexing actual muscles kind of wasn''t her thing.


    No, she was flexing her new...brain...muscles. Alright it wasn''t a fully formed thought, but she was proud of it all the same. Her training with Goldie had shown her what she was lacking. Creativity. Experimentation. She had been reproducing spells almost perfectly...but that''s all she''d been doing with them, making copies. Doing the spell in a textbook way. But a textbook is only supposed to be a guide. She needed to mix things up, try something new.


    So she was trying something new, and it was enormous.


    She sat on a throne of flower petals in the middle of an enormous bouquet she had sprouted from the ground. Every flower wasn''t just a different color, it was a different pattern. There were plaid flowers and paisley flowers and argyle flowers. It was actually hideous, but that wasn''t the point. She was finding ways to tweak her spells.


    She hadn''t just messed with the size and color though, she''d played around with the pollen. Each flower gave off a different smell. She''d decided to go with baked goods, so the bouquet smelled like an entire bakery, like cakes and pies and even that soft burnt smell that comes with a well used kitchen. That one was actually the argyle flower. If the colors were a psychotic mishmash, the smell was where she''d really let her artistry show through.


    ¡°Alright I gotta admit,¡± Evan said. ¡°That''s impressive.¡±


    ¡°I thought you would be making some comment about flowers being vaginal symbolism,¡± Betty said.


    ¡°Nah not this time,¡± Evan shook his head. ¡°I''m too impressed.¡±


    ¡°Then allow me to make a comment on the subject of a vaginal symbol smelling of warm cookies...¡±


    ¡°Babe,¡± Trevor said, putting an arm around her shoulder. ¡°Maybe not.¡±


    ¡°But as we discussed when Jenny and Kyle were absent, the loss of a vocal tone within the group can cause confusion...¡±


    ¡°I think it''s okay,¡± Trevor said.


    ¡°Very well,¡± Betty said. ¡°But I will have a great deal to say about vaginal symbolism later.¡±


    All of her friends appreciated it, but what Tanya was really focused on was her father. There was no way to call the smile on his face anything but proud. And that was...good. It was really good. She didn''t have the common problem she''d heard about, where parents don''t treat their kids like adults. Even when she was now legally an adult. No, she had the opposite problem. Her father seemed to act like she was a sixty year old woman with her own career, and no need for encouragement whatsoever. So finally having her father just look proud was...nice.


    Her eyes were still focused on Dr. Myrden''s face when is eyes went wide, and a spray of blood shot from his mouth. It took her a moment to realize what had happened. A long vine with a fanged mouth at the end had shot out from her bouquet and but down on her father''s side like a shark. Goldie screamed in shock, and the other scrambled in confusion, but Tanya''s mind had gone oddly still.


    Someone hijacked my spell.


    The bouquet exploded into flower petals beneath her and she fell to the ground at the feet of a woman with green hair, wearing leather clothes. Her smile was a little too wide, and green energy flickered in her eyes.


    ¡°Well isn''t this adorable!¡± The woman said. ¡°I get it, having fun, family vacay. Tell you what, hand over the genie and I''ll just go away! Won''t that be amazing? You''re not going to do it though, we never do.¡±


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    ¡°Who the hell are you?¡± Trevor demanded, running in front of the group and dropping into a fighting stance. It was good tactical sense, he was the one who could take hits the best out of any of them there, but it was also just his nature.


    ¡°She''s Slyvanandra,¡± Dr. Myrden said, climbing to his feet. Blood was still trickling out of the side of his mouth, but he glared at the newly arrived woman all the same. ¡°The Forest Shadow. She''s a terrorist.¡±


    ¡°Well technically they call me Lol''Thendmyr''niandalar,¡± Sylvanandra sighed. ¡°Which literally translates to ¡°the shadows in the darkest part of the forest where it is most dangerous.¡± But yeah everybody else just shortens it to Forest Shadow.¡±


    ¡°I''d heard you were an elf,¡± Dr. Myrden said.


    ¡°I am! Of course I am, I....oooohhhh nooooo!¡± She flicked her ears, and the human looking ears shot out into long pointed ones. ¡°No, dammit! I did that so I could get on the plane without the Uzbedis finding me...are you telling me I''ve had my ears the wrong shape for days!? The whole time I was fighting that government bitch? Nooooo! I am so embarrassed. Not embarrassed enough to miss you all surrounding me and getting ready to fight, but pretty damn embarrassed.¡±


    Tanya had scrabbled away from the woman''s feet and joined the others, surrounding the deranged elf woman and calling on their powers. Sylvanandra turned to look at each of them, a small smile on her face.


    ¡°Trevor,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°Yeah I know,¡± Trevor nodded. ¡°You, me, and Evan keep her busy. Everyone else gets out of here with the doc.¡±


    ¡°Why me!?¡± Evan said.


    ¡°It''s us three because we have the strongest physical enhancements,¡± Kyle said.


    ¡°I mean I''m more of a plan guy...¡±


    ¡°Evan!¡±


    ¡°Alright alright,¡± Evan sighed.


    ¡°Just remember Goldie is watching,¡± Trevor suggested.


    ¡°Hey that''s an idea!¡± Evan perked up. ¡°Maybe she''ll take Goldie instead! Hey, crazy elf lady, do you want a blonde chick who''s way to full of herself...¡±


    ¡°I will rip your pubic hair out by the roots!¡± Goldie snarled.


    ¡°Okay okay, I''m kidding,¡± Evan said. ¡°Geeze, way to push the sale price down...¡±


    ¡°You''re all adorable,¡± the elf woman laughed. ¡°And that''s a pretty good plan. But the problem is that I''m way, waystronger. Than all of you. Put together. On your best day. On steroids. With...oh, another item to make the length of this list funnier. Whatever I''m bored now!¡±


    Vines erupted from around her feet and grabbed them all before any of them had a chance to move. Dr. Myrden coughed up more blood as he was squeezed, but the only one she had eyes for was Jenny. The vine lowered the genie down until she was face to face with the elf, struggling in the vine''s grip.


    ¡°Look at you!¡± Sylvanandra said. ¡°The last genie. And you''re gorgeous. Been having fun on your little forest retreat? Hmm, of course if you''re out of the lamp someone around here is your master. And we need you not to have a master or we can''t make a wish. I mean that''s really the whole point of you, right? So are you gonna tell me which one it is? I bet it''s one of these nice handsome guys. Oh, please tell me it''s not that little reedy one, that would break my heart.¡±


    ¡°Hey!¡± Evan shouted. Right at the same instant as Goldie yelled ¡°He''s not that bad!¡±


    ¡°Aww,¡± Evan said. ¡°You care!¡±


    ¡°If we survive I''m going to kill you,¡± Goldie snapped.


    ¡°I''m not telling!¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°Oh good!¡± Sylvanandra clapped her hands. ¡°Loyalty! That means he must be good and kind and all that crap. Which makes this whole thing a lot easier.¡±


    The elf put her hand up to the side of Jenny''s face and thorny vines grew from her fingernails, wrapping themselves around Jenny''s head, sliding into her nose and mouth, forcing her lips open, digging into her pinkish purple skin. Jenny screamed.


    ¡°Hey!¡± Kyle roared, lunging in her direction. ¡°Let her go!¡±


    ¡°Bingo!¡± Sylvanandra said. ¡°Oh, honey, good choice! I bet you two have been having all kinds of fun since you got out of the lamp! I''d love to leave you to it, and maybe watch, but he''s gotta die so...hmm. That''s an unexpected complication. He shouldn''t be able to do that.¡±


    Kyle was breaking free of the vines. Not quickly, but they were starting to snap as he strained against them. The elf directed more vines to encase him, but he started breaking through those too. There was a pop from another of the hanging vines, and Trevor started breaking through his bonds as well.


    ¡°Okay fair enough stronger than I expected,¡± she said. ¡°But it''s still nit bridging the gap.¡±


    And, struggling in vines of her own, Tanya knew she was right. The elf was more powerful than all of them put together, even her father. But she was distracted, wasn''t she? And besides, Tanya had just learned how to ruin a nature mage''s day. Sylvanandra had taught her.


    Think creatively, Tanya thought, sending her power into the vines that held her hostage. She let her power seep into them, mix with them. She tried to take control of the spell.


    ¡°Hey!¡± The elf snapped. ¡°What are you doing!? Stop that!¡±


    Sylvanandra tried to counter with more power of her own, but as soon as she was distracted Kyle and Trevor started breaking their bonds faster. So she poured in more power, and more, but with every distraction Tanya gained control of more of the spell.


    There was a moment of tension, of inheld breath, as the various forces found themselves in a stalemate.


    And then the vines, filled with more magical power than any living plant should ever be, attempting to follow two conflicting sets of instructions from two different masters, exploded.

 Chapter 44: Duck Hunt: Forest Therapy Gone Wild, Part 1

    Evan had come to realize he was not as durable as Trevor and Kyle. Physical enhancement probably worked differently on different body types, or something. Well it was called enhancement, maybe it just made what your body was already good at...better? Tough to tell. But absolutely none of that mattered right now, because Evan was about to hit the ground. Hard. And he wasn''t actually positive he could survive the impact.


    So he grabbed a branch. It wasn''t enough to stop him, but it did slow him down and change the direction of his momentum. He bounced off the trunks of a couple of tress and finally landed in the dirt. Just for fun, he did the whole superhero landing, because he''d always wanted to do that.


    ¡°Okay that was pretty awesome,¡± Evan muttered to himself. ¡°The question is what do I do now...getting out of the forest might make the most sense, but is it actually the move I get the most out of? Tough call.¡±


    Evan was distracted from his thoughts by an enormous crash, and the sound of someone yelling. It sounded like they were trying to make words, but something was making their voice muffled. Evan followed the sound to find Jenny hanging upside down in a tree, her shirt dangling down over her face, giving him a view of...


    Well, he''d seen them before right? Mount Genie Mammaries. The Pinkish-Purple Rockies. Of course last time Jenny had been in human disguise so they''d been more of a dusky caramel, with an illusion over them, and he''d only seen them for a second so maybe he was technically seeing them for the first time? The lecherous glee of what he thought of as the old him slid across his brain, but he forced himself to focus. He was past that now, right? He had bigger plans, bigger goals, more opportunities. He wasn''t going to sit here drooling over Kyle''s Girlfriend''s rack, he wasn''t that guy anymore.


    Mostly.


    He walked up and grabbed the shirt, pulling it off of Jenny''s face. That got him a shriek and a face full of bright, dancing lights like a maniac kaleidoscope. The swirling, sparkling geometry almost made him hurl as he stumbled away from her.


    ¡°Oh Evan!¡± Jenny said. ¡°I didn''t gmpf rmf frrf fff.¡±


    ¡°Shirt fell in your mouth again didn''t it?¡± Evan said as his vision cleared. ¡°Damn, that spell hits hard, I''m gonna have to remember that. Come on, let me help you down.¡±


    ¡°Frfff!¡±


    Evan grabbed Jenny''s shoulders this time, helping her down from the tree and setting her on the ground. She tucked her chest away hurriedly, glancing at Evan.


    ¡°I thought you didn''t mind having those out,¡± Evan said.


    ¡°I don''t think Kyle would like having you stare at them,¡± Jenny said. ¡°He wouldn''t say anything because he''s trying to protect my culture, and I''ll stash them because I''m trying to respect him.¡±


    ¡°And besides,¡± Evan muttered. ¡°It''s me looking. Alright fine, what do we do now?¡±


    ¡°I''m going to find Kyle,¡± Jenny said, pointing into the forest. ¡°He''s in that direction. And then we have to save Dr. Myrden.¡±


    ¡°Yeah is it doctor or mister?¡± Evan said. ¡°I feel like we''ve used both a whole lot.¡±


    ¡°I think it''s technically doctor but we used mister by mistake a few times and he never corrected us,¡± Jenny shrugged. ¡°Is this important right now? We''re under attack.¡±


    ¡°Good point,¡± Evan said. ¡°Alright, let''s go get Kyle.¡±


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    The two of them walked off into the forest together, unaware of the delicate negotiations Dr...or, if you preferred, Mr...Myrden was conducting on their behalf. After they''d been walking for a few minutes in silence, Evan finally gave a deep sigh.


    ¡°Look let''s get this over with,¡± he turned to Jenny. ¡°You don''t like me very much, do you?¡±


    Jenny looked at him for a moment and hesitated, which was really all the answer Evan needed. Jenny being Jenny, she would normally have responded with a loud, shrieking ¡°no!¡± And then maybe an attempted hug. But she hesitated, so basically Evan had his answer.


    ¡°I don''t know,¡± Jenny finally said. ¡°I mean, you''re Evan and Betty''s best friend. And you''re not mean, or anything. And the stuff I noticed when we first meant, I mean, I know you''ve been trying to get better with it! I know you are! But when I first met you you were...¡±


    ¡°Small,¡± Evan said bitterly. ¡°Creepy.¡±


    ¡°Small isn''t something that bothers me,¡± Jenny said. ¡°I don''t know about creepy, exactly, at least not the way you mean it. But when I first met you, you were trying to grope women and spy on them. Constantly. Everyone seemed to laugh it off, but it was still...look, if it was the era I came from, nobody would have batted an eye. Of course that''s how men should treat women, everyone knew that.


    ¡°But it''s thousands and thousands of years later, now. And it''s better. Most people seem to have learned better now, so...you should too. Besides, the way you perv after women it seemed a little...off.I''m sorry, I don''t know what else to call it, there was something extra hungry in it.


    ¡°But you''re with Goldie now! And you definitely haven''t been leching the same way! So I think maybe you were just in a bad place, and needed a boost to get you out of it? But first impressions are hard to forget. So really I guess it''s my fault, I''m not respecting all the progress you made! So I''ll try to be better from now on.¡±


    Evan opened his mouth to speak.


    ¡°This would not be a good time to ask to see my breasts, even if you''re joking.¡±


    ¡°Yeah,¡± Evan said with a sheepish grin. ¡°You''re probably right, sorry. I couldn''t resist, the joke was right there. But is that really what you thought of me when we first met?¡±


    Jenny gave him a long look.


    ¡°Think about it Evan,¡± she said. ¡°Really think about it. If it had been you instead of Kyle, the old you, what would your wish have been?¡±


    ¡°We don''t even actually know what Kyle''s wish was!¡±


    ¡°Still,¡± Jenny pressed, and Evan sighed.


    ¡°Yeah okay,¡± Evan admitted. ¡°Probably something messed up. Mind control powers maybe. But you''re right Jenny, I''m trying. I''m not the guy constantly trying to grab Ammeline''s ass in chemistry class anymore. You''re right, I was in a...a dark place. I''ve been in a dark place for a while. But this? All of this? Despite how crazy and dangerous it is? I think it''s the light in the darkness I needed. I can finally start working towards what I really want now.¡±


    ¡°Well good! Jenny said. ¡°Let''s look out!¡±


    She shoved Evan to side, which was unnecessary. His enhanced body had better reflexes than she did, so as they were both dodging her threw her to the side. Bamboo shoots shot up from the ground where they had both been standing moments ago, sharpened at the tip.


    ¡°Sorry I couldn''t take the therapy session anymore,¡± Sylvanandra said, walking out of the shadows. ¡°Hey, how was that? I mean I figured I should make some kind of rude, evil comment about your conversation when I walked out to fight you guys, so I went with that one. I mean I only had a second to think it up, but it was pretty good right? I''m pretty good at this evil villain dialogue thing!¡±


    ¡°The elf!¡± Evan said. ¡°Why did the crazy elf come after us?¡±


    ¡°I think that''s just a copy,¡± Jenny said. ¡°She doesn''t feel nearly as powerful.¡±


    ¡°Yep!¡± She laughed. ¡°I''m just a copy. I mean, I''m actually a part of the original body''s consciousness sent to inhabit a body made of wood and shadows, and it''s an incredibly powerful feat of magic that even the crusty old wizard back at the camp couldn''t pull off if he wanted to, but you know yeah. I''m just a copy.¡±


    ¡°You''re here to take me back,¡± Jenny said,


    ¡°Honestly you almost don''t matter,¡± Sylvanandra said dismissively. ¡°I mean if we kill your master, and take your lamp, there is exactly shit all you can do about us making a wish. So actually capturing you isn''t as much of a big deal as killing that Kyle kid is. But I really did overhear your conversation, and I thought I could offer a different perspective on what you were talking about.¡±


    ¡°What are you talking about?¡± Evan demanded. ¡°What perspective?¡±


    Sylvanandra lifted her top to show Evan her breasts.


    ¡°What do you think?¡± Sylvanandra said. ¡°Not as big as Miss Geniejuggs over here, but not bad for shadows and sawdust right? I think the real ones might be a little perkier, I''ll have to check once I rejoin with the original.¡±


    ¡°What does this have to do with anything!?¡± Jenny demanded.


    ¡°It has everything to do with everything!¡± the elf let her top drop down. ¡°Why not grab this chicks ass, if you want? Why not come over here and try to grab my tits? I mean I''ll kill you if you do, but I plan on killing you anyway so why the hell not? Why let this fucking normies try and tell you who to be? So you putting your hands on hot chicks, I can dig it.


    ¡°Everyone''s so caught up with rules. From you all the way up to the fucking Uzbedis. You wanna know what the rules are? Being strong. That''s it, that''s the rules. Right now Uzbedi is so so strong it gets to tell everyone else how to live, and it''s boring.We''re gonna make a world where your friend here can grope all the ass he wants, if he''s strong enough to do it. And if she doesn''t want her ass groped she''d better be strong enough to make him stop. Because anything else is just stupid.¡±


    ¡°So that''s what you''re fighting for?¡± Jenny asked. ¡°Global anarchy?¡±


    ¡°Yeah sure,¡± Sylvanandra waved her hand. ¡°That. Eventually. First we''ve got to get rid of the Uzbedis. Which, I mean, nobody likes them and their stupid rules and their stupid conspiracy to keep magic a secret, so everybody should be on our side! We can worry about getting rid of all the governments and stuff later. So how about it? Ready to grab the genie chick and come to my side? I''ll trade you thirty whole seconds of groping elf tits.¡±


    Evan sighed.


    ¡°You know I think there was a time I would have jumped for that offer,¡± he admitted. ¡°But I''m kind of a different person now.¡±


    ¡°Too bad,¡± Sylvanandra shrugged. ¡°Guess you gotta die.¡±

 Chapter 45: Duck Hunt, Forest Therapy Gone Wild, Part 2

    Jenny did not have enhanced strength.


    In fact, muscle wise, she was a little weaker than an average human. That wasn''t because she was a genie, it was because of her. Her build, her natural talents, her natural tendencies. Had she been born a human, she would simply not have been very athletic. But shed been born a genie, which meant there were ways to compensate. Dr. Myrden had been showing her. So she flooded her muscles with magic. In a way, she was faking the physical enhancement Kyle, Evan, and Trevor had built into their bodies now. It made her faster and stronger, and she could close the distance to the deranged elf faster than if she was floating.


    Evan got their first, of course. He was actually physically enhanced. But it didn''t matter who got their first, because Sylvanandra disappeared seconds before Evan''s fist could collide with her. Her laughter echoed from the trees around them.


    ¡°Ooh scary!¡± she laughed. ¡°Look, I''m going to have to beat you both up but I guess you don''t have to die. So just lay down and I''ll wrap you up in vines or something. Your other option is to fight a sorceress so talented with shadow magic and nature magic her title is The Forest Shadow....in a big dark scary forest. Does that sound smart? Because it sounds kind of stupid to me.¡±


    ¡°Yeah well I guess we''re stupid!¡± Jenny shouted.


    ¡°Apparently so am I,¡± Evan grumbled. ¡°I picked this over her tits, something is seriously...¡±


    Something grabbed him around the ankle and dragged him into the air. A huge vine swung him up and brought him back towards the ground at breakneck speed, but Jenny tackled him out of the vine''s grip at the last second. It withered away as they sat up together in the dirt.


    ¡°That feels like cheating,¡± Evan complained.


    ¡°I don''t think there''s cheating in the fight to the death,¡± Jenny said.


    ¡°So you''ve got flight, and illusion magic right?¡± Evan said. ¡°That''s about like the sum total of your powers?¡±


    ¡°I''ve been working on other stuff!¡± Jenny said. ¡°I can throw magical bolts now too.¡±


    ¡°How big?¡± Evan asked.


    ¡°Uhhhh....pretty big,¡± Jenny said. ¡°But it would take me a while to get my magic organized to throw a really big one.¡±


    ¡°Okay fine,¡± Evan said. ¡°Look, would you follow a plan I came up with?¡±


    ¡°I mean your whole big focus is your enhanced brain right?¡± Jenny said. ¡°Get your hand off my thigh and sure!¡±


    ¡°Sorry old habits,¡± Evan removed his hand. ¡°This is what we''re gonna do...¡±


    He bagan to hurriedly whisper a plan, but not hurriedly enough for Sylvanandra.


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    ¡°I''m sorry are you two done?¡± her voice echoed through the trees. ¡°I mean I get that it''s all polite and whatever to give you time for hero dialogue, but this is getting ridiculous.¡±


    ¡°Yeah,¡± Evan said, brushing himself off. ¡°Yeah we''re good. Just talking about how annoying it is when you do the echoing voice thing so we can''t tell where you are.¡±


    ¡°Pretty cool right!?¡± Sylvanandra sounded incredibly proud. ¡°I mean it''s super basic stuff for both forest magic and shadow magic, so I''m really good at it...¡±


    ¡°Yeah but the thing is you''re just a copy of the original,¡± Evan said. ¡°But you''re a really good copy. And your heart is still beating, you pointy eared pain in my ass.¡±


    Evan disappeared in a blur of motion and reappeared behind Sylvanandra in the tree she was sitting in. The elf yelped in surprise as evan punched for the back of her head, but she swung around the tree branch like a monkey and dodged the blow. Evan kept going, plummeting towards the ground, but she caught his ankle.


    ¡°This is a bad day for your ankles,¡± she said, slamming him against the tree and letting him drop. Cuts from the bark leaked blood from all over, but he landed on his feet as she gracefully dropped to the forest floor beside him. She looked almost angelic that way.


    Must be an elf thing, Evan thought bitterly. Lucky bastards.


    ¡°Tell you what,¡± he said out loud. ¡°How about we stop fighting and you let me give you a bad day for your knees?¡±


    Sylvanandra blinked.


    ¡°Was...was that supposed to be a blowjob joke?¡±


    ¡°Kind of what I was going for yeah,¡± Evan shrugged.


    ¡°That was terrible,¡± the elf shook her head. ¡°First of all, I am never going to blow you. Second...seriously? I''m gonna blowjob so hard it breaks all your knees? That''s not hot orintimidating, it''s just weird.¡±


    ¡°I''ve been told I''m weird,¡± Evan said. ¡°Look I was going for sexualized tough guy dialogue and it didn''t work, okay? Can we move on?¡±


    ¡°You realize it would be better to capture your friend, but it''s not necessary. Right?¡± The elf pulled a strand of hair out of her face. ¡°Once we kill her master and get the lamp, she''ll be drawn back to grant our wishes anyway. So making stupid blowjob jokes to give her time to run away isn''t going to....oh never mind, she''s still there.¡±


    Jenny stood in the clearing where they''d been talking before, eyes closed, hands in front of her as she gradually gathered a bigger and bigger ball of pinkish magical energy. Sylvanandra gasped, her eyes sparkling.


    ¡°It''s a spirit bomb!¡± she said excitedly. ¡°You''re doing a spirit bomb! She''s powering up some big magical attack while you''re fighting me so I can''t stop her! It''s a spirit bomb!¡±


    ¡°It''s got nothing to do with...¡±


    ¡°It''s a spirit bomb!¡± Sylvanandra cut him off.


    ¡°Scenes about defended power ups aren''t exclusive to....¡±


    ¡°Spirit bomb!¡±


    ¡°I mean okay, maybe it''s a little similar to...¡±


    ¡°Spirit!¡± The elf said pointedly. ¡°Bomb!¡±


    ¡°Yes okay!? Yes, fine, it''s a freaking spirit bomb!¡± Evan said. ¡°Just because it''s unoriginal doesn''t mean it isn''t going to work! You obviously can''t do that vine trick again or you would have already, probably something to do with this just being a copy body. And I''m strong and fast and I can definitely keep you busy before she blows your ass to...clone...hell. Or whatever happens when we blow you up.¡±


    Evan charged in to punch her.


    ¡°You''re right,¡± Sylvanandra sighed. ¡°That thing she''s building looks like it could maybe hurt my original body, and this is just a much weaker clone. And I couldn''t even give any of the clones all my powers, this one got almost no magic at all.¡±


    She casually caught Evan by the face, halting him mid attack.


    ¡°That''s because I gave it all the physical enhancement,¡± the elf laughed, slamming Evan''s face into the ground. She turned and bolted towards Jenny and the growing ball of magic.


    ¡°No!¡± Evan shouted as the elf''s hand slammed into Jenny''s stomach and just...kept going.


    Through empty air.


    Jenny disappeared in a rush of sparkling pink magic and reappeared at the edge of the clearing, a huge ball of magic in her hands.


    ¡°Got you!¡± Jenny shouted, throwing the ball. It slammed into the confused elf with an enormous burst of sparkling pink energy, throwing sylvanandra''s smoking body through the air. The elf''s skin was charred, and she was missing an arm on one side and a leg on the other, smoke pouring from her mouth.


    ¡°You...bitch!¡± The Sylvanandra coughed. ¡°Gimme a minute to heal this and I''m gonna...¡±


    And then Evan was just there. It was like he hadn''t even moved, suddenly he just appeared beside her in the air, a broken branch impaled through her heart. The elft coughed up blood...and then the clone''s body collapsed into leaves and starlight that blew away on the wind. When Evan landed on the ground he stood alone.


    Until Jenny tackled and hugged him.


    ¡°Great job!¡± She said. ¡°That plan worked so well!¡±


    ¡°I only told you to hide and power up,¡± Evan said. ¡°I didn''t expect the illusion. I got so pissed when I saw you just standing out in the open like that...why didn''t you tell me you could cast illusions and charge up that spell at the same time?¡±


    ¡°We were in a hurry,¡± Jenny said. ¡°But we did it right? Big win!¡±


    ¡°We did it,¡± Evan agreed.


    ¡°So let''s go find Kyle and the others!¡± Jenny said. ¡°And take your hand off my thigh.¡±


    ¡°Sorry! Sorry. Old habits.¡±

 Chapter 46: Duck Hunt, The Logic of Muffins, Part 1

    Goldie and Betty hit the forest floor with significantly less grace than either Evan or Jenny, because neither of them had any real physical enhancement. They were durable enough thanks to their active nodes to take the hit, but it was still a jarring impact as they crashed into the ground.


    ¡°What just happened?¡± Goldie groaned, picking herself up.


    ¡°I would assume some kind of magical feedback reaction,¡± Betty said. ¡°But I only know the bare basics of sorcery, and even then my education has been mostly geared towards training me as a summoner. You probably have more basic magical knowledge than I do, at this point.¡±


    ¡°Yeah great,¡± Goldie said. ¡°Know what that''s been worth? This.¡±


    She waved her fingers and produced a swirl of sparkling motes of light in dozens of colors.


    ¡°It is certainly eye catching,¡± Betty said appreciatively.


    ¡°Yeah but it''s not exactly super useful right now is it?¡± Goldie said.


    ¡°I do not see how it can be applied to our current situation, no,¡± Betty admitted.


    ¡°Right, our current situation.¡± Goldie sighed. ¡°What the hell do we do now?¡±


    ¡°I assume we offer assistance.¡±


    ¡°Yeah but we just covered I''m not going to be much good at offering any assistance,¡± Goldie said. ¡°Maybe I should head towards civilization. Get...help? Maybe I can call those magic cops who swept the whole Danny mess under the rug.¡±


    ¡°While I do not know our exact location the impression is that we are many, many miles from civilization. And any equipment to contact assistance would be...¡±


    ¡°Back at the cabin,¡± Goldie sighed. ¡°With the killer elf.¡±


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    ¡°Perhaps my summons can hold off the elf while you contact assistance,¡± Betty suggested. ¡°Either way, we should move back in the direction of the cabin.¡±


    ¡°I suppose you''re right,¡± Goldie sighed. ¡°Elves now. My life includes elves now. This is not how I expected to be spending the summer before college.¡±


    ¡°The sudden revelation of magic''s existence has been an adjustment for everyone,¡± Betty admitted.


    ¡°And all because Anderman made a wish,¡± Goldie muttered.


    ¡°Do you resent him for it?¡±


    ¡°I mean, I kind of want to. But if I found a genie I''d have made a wish too, right? So I can get angry at him all day, but I''d have done the same thing. Maybe not if I knew there were going to be demon bullies and killer elves, but....¡±


    ¡°I am actually quite grateful to Kyle,¡± Betty said. ¡°Despite our current predicament, I find most of the magic I have witnessed...wondrous. Not to mention that it began the sequence of events which brought me to Trevor. Not that I am defining myself by male attention, simply that Trevor was something that could not have occurred before the magical changes to the world.¡±


    ¡°I think he might have gotten around to asking you out anyway,¡± Goldie said. ¡°But yeah I get it. Trevor isn''t the point, the way your life changed is the point. But I''m not sure I wanted my life to change, you know? I had things pretty well figured out. And now I''m dating Evan. No one who has their life figured out is dating Evan.¡±


    ¡°I believe we are now deliberately failing the Bechdel test,¡± Betty said, and they both laughed. Well Betty''s was more of a smirk, but still. After that they walked in silence for a while, through the waving branches of the woods.


    ¡°But since we have already thoroughly failed at Bechdel...¡±


    ¡°Sure, go for it.¡±


    ¡°Why do you think Trevor has not yet let lust overcome him?¡±


    Goldie looked Betty up and down.


    ¡°No idea,¡± Goldie said. ¡°I''m not a relationship expert. You two seem good together. Trevor''s always been super popular, but that can be a problem by itself. Maybe he doesn''t have any better an idea what he''s doing than you do. I mean he hasn''t had a girlfriend since he got here...maybe you''re his first. But I dunno, I''m just guessing. Dating was not on my plan. Dating Evan is probably some kind of Ancient Egyptian curse.¡±


    ¡°Fair enough,¡± Betty nodded. ¡°Of course if this were a novel, you would have had some advice. Some kind of colorful metaphor about muffins.¡±


    Goldie stopped and blinked at Betty.


    ¡°Why muffins?¡±


    ¡°I do not know. But muffins were what came to mind when I thought about sage relationship advice from the more advanced, more popular girl.¡±


    ¡°Huh.¡± Goldie scratched her head. ¡°I...cannot think of a way relationships are like muffins.¡±


    ¡°Warm and soft and you want to put your mouth...¡±


    ¡°I''m going to stop you right there,¡± Goldie held up a hand. ¡°We''re about to do the thing where you get weirdly sexual, and I''m kind of too lost in the woods walking towards a killer elf sorceress to handle that right now.¡±


    ¡°I suppose you have a point,¡± Betty said. ¡°But I believe I had a point about lips on muffins.¡±


    Goldie stopped and put her hands over her eyes.


    ¡°See when Jenny says stuff like that it''s because she''s from a hundred thousand years ago or something and doesn''t know what she''s saying,¡± Goldie pointed out. ¡°But you always DO know what you''re saying.¡±


    ¡°The world would be very boring if we were not all individuals.¡±


    ¡°When are we going to reach the cabin?¡± Goldie changed the subject as quickly as she could. ¡°It feels like we''ve been walking forever.¡±


    ¡°That has been concerning me as well.¡± Betty peered out into the forest. ¡°I was using a simple spell to guide us back, but it seems confused. And I also feel like we should have already...¡±


    When Betty turned back Goldie was gone, and Betty found herself alone in the vast forest.

 Chapter 47: The Duckinterlude

    Sylvanandra watched the girl with the glasses (Betty, of course, but the elf sorceress didn''t know names) through the shadows where she hid. Betty was...a puzzle. And Sylvanandra hated puzzles. Or anything, really, that required too much patience. Except for stalking and hunting, she liked that. But puzzles weren''t patience, they were...they were like hunting something through glass, you kept almost getting where you needed to go, and then not getting there, and it was just so frustrating, so she''d get mad, and then a whole town was gone and Taliesin was telling her she wasn''t allowed to do puzzles anymore.


    But she also had to win this stupid game, which normally would be great she liked games except this chick with the glasses being obnoxious. She felt powerful. Really powerful. The only two who felt more powerful, in terms of just raw magical strength, were the genie and her master. But those two were simple, easy to understand opponents. They were magical bulldozers. She worked with a few of those, and she was stronger and better trained than they were anyway, she was pretty sure. But the girl with the glasses...


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    Her power felt weird.


    And her personality! Sylvanandra couldn''t get a bead on her personality. That was important. Everyone thought she was just crazy, all impulses and fury, but she wasn''t. She really wasn''t. She knew how to fight! And part of fighting was predicting your opponent. And she couldn''t predict glasses girl. She couldn''t predict glasses girl at all. So the elf had decided to isolate her, observe her, see what she did when she found herself all alone. That would give her some information.


    Now, what was she up too....


    She was talking to a duck. In a tiara.


    Sylvanandra could just cry.

 Chapter 48: The Logic of Muffins, Part 2

    Betty found herself alone in the forest.


    This was...disconcerting. Yes, that was a good word. She could work with that word, she would use that word going forward. This was disconcerting.


    Not just because one of her newest friends had just disappeared. That was disconcerting in and of itself. And she was worried...well, disconcerted, she''d committed to the word she might as well really commit...about what could have happened or be happening to her new friend. And it was equally disconcerting that looking around she could find no trace of where Goldie had gone, which meant she had no way of telling where any attack on hermight come from. But if she was being honest, and Betty was usually honest, people even told her sometimes she was toohonest although she didn''t really understand that, she was most disconcerted because she suddenly found herself alone in a great big dark scary forest with an evil sorceress in it someplace.


    That was quite definitely disconcerting.


    ¡°Ah,¡± she said out loud. ¡°But wait. I am not alone. I am a summoner. A summoner, by definition, can never be alone.¡±


    So she sat down on the forest floor. This might have seemed unwise, but Betty reasoned that if she couldn''t tell the direction an attack was coming from anyway she might as well be comfortable. She focused, concentrated, and with a rush of magic power from her stomach she was no longer alone in the big dark scary forest, and therefore slightly less disconcerted.


    ¡°Hello,¡± she said to the cat and duck who had appeared before her. ¡°We are all agreed that the one attacking us is the elf sorceress?¡±


    ¡°I can sense her,¡± Quakfina agreed. ¡°She feels...weaker. Maybe she was weakened in the explosion? Or more likely, she''s sent a duplicate after you.¡±


    ¡°Her being less powerful increases our chances of victory. Can either of you tell what direction the elf is attacking from?¡±


    Midnight shook his head.


    ¡°No,¡± Quakfina said. ¡°Sensory magic is neither of our specialties, and both shadow and forest magic excel at stealth. Now, please don''t take this the wrong way dear, but if you were a little better trained you might be able to grant competing powers to Midnight, since he can access the powers of any of the Five Elements found in eastern philosophy. Fire would be particularly helpful here. It sheds light to banish shadow, and forest magic calls on the wood element, which fire consumes.¡±


    ¡°I am not offended. I am a novice sorceress, and Midnight is a very powerful familiar.¡±


    ¡°Mrow!¡±Midnight said proudly.


    ¡°But even if I cannot yet bring out his full potential he canaccess fire magic. He did it before.¡±


    ¡°Only a little,¡± Quakfina said. ¡°Your focus has mostly been in water. For the last battle you fought it was the element you needed. I doubt he could summon the power to pierce her veils. Maybe if you could find a way to tie to the fire element, but I believe fire will be the most difficult for you.¡±


    ¡°Why would that be?¡± Betty asked.


    ¡°Fire is the element of passion. Rage. Intense emotion.¡±


    ¡°Ah. That is somewhat disappointing.¡±


    ¡°Yes I think you''ve just proved my point,¡± Quakfina sighed.


    ¡°Then we will have to do what we can with water,¡± Betty said. ¡°I have a plan. I have been working on it for a while, as a matter of fact.¡±


    ¡°You have? Oh! I can feel it now! That''s...hey, that might work!¡±


    ¡°But it does require me to be attacked. Why has she not attacked me yet?¡±


    ¡°I do not know,¡± Quakfina said. ¡°We should be able to sense her in the moment before she attacks. Not to sound immodest, but I am an extremelypowerful magical being. I''ll be quite the asset once you can handle my full power.¡±


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    ¡°Then she must be goaded.¡± Betty stood and cupped her hands around her mouth.


    ¡°Hello out there, you ridiculous pointy eared excuse for a two dollar prostitute, would you...¡±


    ¡°Look out!¡±


    Betty rolled to the side as a vine slammed into the ground where she''d been standing. As she stood Sylvanandra, or at leas this split version of her, stepped out of the trees, eyes glaring.


    ¡°Two dollars!?¡± The elf sorceress screamed.


    ¡°Forgive me, I did not mean to imply you overcharged. Perhaps if I could look at your price sheet, I could aim my insults at the penny options.¡±


    Sylvanandra let out an inarticulate scream of rage and called upon her magic. At which point the ground under Betty''s feet shifted...


    And nothing else.


    ¡°What the hell?¡± Sylvanandra hissed. ¡°My forest magic isn''t working? We''re in a forest!!!¡±


    ¡°I take it you have never attempted to keep a houseplant,¡± Betty said. ¡°I will not deny this requires a great deal of magic to maintain, but even with my powerful spells limited to water there is a simple counter for your forest magic.¡±


    ¡°What counter!?¡± Sylvanandra insisted. ¡°Ice maybe, but you don''t have the control for that! What could you possibly be....¡±


    Betty punched her in the face.


    Betty''s body was not particularly enhanced, and while she''d been doing some training lately she''d never been the most athletic. The impact of the punch was more mental than physical. Before the fight began the evil elf would have been sure, sure,that getting punched in the face by this woman would have been impossible. If she''d even considered it at all. Because it was ridiculous.


    ¡°Dammit!¡± she stumbled back, clutching her mouth. ¡°I cut my lip on a tooth! Ahh, that sucks!¡±


    ¡°Much like you for...I would guess a nickel?¡±


    ¡°Oh no!¡± Sylvanandra said. ¡°You''re not going to get me all confused and unfocused again. I knewyou were gonna be annoying to fight. Your power makes more sense now that I know you''re a summoner...hey, where did your cat go?¡±


    Midnight raced through the forest, flames flickering from his body. He had been given a mission by his summoner, who he had come to deeply love. Not that he''d ever tell herthat. He was a cat after all. Alright so a Five Elements Cat wasn''t exactly a cat, he was still basically a cat. And that meant deeply loving someone to the core of you and never, ever, actually admitting it. Oh look, you happen to be in the same room as me? Again? Oh very well, you can scratch my head. If you must.Now let me blink at you slowly, don''t get all clingy or whatever it doesn''t mean anything.


    Now, his mission was...there!


    He had found the woven cocoon of vines and shadow where Goldie was being held prisoner. That had been his mission. Find Goldie, if she was alive, and free her. With a yowl he clawed open the cocoon. It took longer than he''d like. He understood it was important to protect everyone in the clowder, but Betty was his person.He had to go back and help her!


    As the cocoon finallyburst open and Goldie stumbled out into the forest, sucking in big gulps of air, his only thought was getting back to Betty.


    ¡°Where''s Betty!?¡± Goldie asked frantically, and Midnight decided this human might be pretty nice too. Not that he''d ever tell her that.


    Betty had Sylvanandra on the ground, straddling her waist and punching her in the face. She just wished it was doing more damage. The elf seemed more inconvenienced by the whole thing than hurt.


    ¡°Get off me!¡± Sylvanandra shouted, grabbing Betty by the neck and hurling her off. And that word was chosen carefully, hurling.She threw Betty across the clearing until the slammed into the base of a tree.


    ¡°Ow,¡± Betty said, picking herself up.


    ¡°I get what you''re doing now! Oh, that''s obnoxious. That''s reallyobnoxious! I''ve never seen anyone try that before! You''re drowningmy spells! Normally forest magic feeds of water magic, but you''re pouring so much water magic into the ground my plants drown in it before they can grow and hurt you! Damn, that''s...that''s actually pretty impressive! I''m impressed! Do you know how often I''m impressed? Because it''s not often. But!You made a mistake.¡±


    ¡°And what was that?¡± Betty said.


    ¡°You assumed I could only attack with the forest magic.¡±


    Sylvanandra curled her fingers into claws, and blades of shadow erupted from their tips. She charged at Betty, claws extended.


    ¡°Betty!¡± Quakfina shouted, her body starting to glow. Betty held up her hands to block...which worked a lot better than she thought, because there was suddenly a sword in them. It was made of a silvery blue metal, beautifully sculpted in the shape of an outstretched wing, complete with feathers so intricate they almost looked real. The hilt was a pair of closed wings, and the pommel was the head of a duck.


    A very familiar duck.


    ¡°Ow!¡± Sylvanandra stumbled back, blood seeping from cuts in the palms of her hands. ¡°Dammit, that hurt!¡±


    ¡°Oh well done Betty!¡± Quakfina said, the bill on the pommel of the sword moving like a regular beak. ¡°You''ve accessed another level of my power! Not many of my summoners ever mastered the Divine Wing Blade!¡±


    ¡°It is very impressive, but there is one issue with this form. I do not have the slightest idea how to use a sword.¡±


    ¡°Dammit I don''t care why fancy weapons you''ve come out with!¡± Sylvanandra hissed, shadow whipping around her body like a cloak. Blades of shadow exploded out from her, and while Betty blocked the first few clumsily with the blade there were just too many of them and they slashed into her, deep cuts in her side and legs, and Betty fell bleeding to the floor.


    ¡°Now die!¡± The elf shrieked, lunging at Betty with her shadow claws raised.

 Chapter 49: The Logic of Muffins Part 3

    "SCREAMING FIREFLY DRAGON!"


    Sylvanandra flinched back in surprise as a dragon made of sparkling light swopped down at them. It was beautiful and brilliant, formed from a thousand colors in a million shades, a huge fanged creature of the Chinese type, long and thin and slithering through the air. From Betty''s perspective, the main advantage of this was that the descending claws of shadow pulled away from her face.


    "Another summoner!?" Sylvanandra hissed, leaping away, her eyes tracking to the forest where Goldie stood, sparks of light emitting from her hands. Next to her was Midnight, fire flickering from his neck and paws, his stripes black and glowing red. Unfortunately, unlike his water form, he was still ordinary housecat sized. Midnight snarled and ran at Sylvanandra while Goldie brought the sparkling dragon down for another swing. Betty sat up.


    "That was extremely frightening," she said, in a complete monotone. "I assume Goldie has not miraculously bonded with a dragon familiar while we were fighting."


    "No. That''s an incredible bluff she''s constructed out of her lights." Quakfina confirmed. "Which are still her only spell. It''s actually extremely impressive, considering how recently she accessed her magical power. I think she might have exceptional control, which can be useful for someone with low magical capacity. It can make them a dangerous fighter. Unfortunately, that is not going to happen today during this fight."


    "We are the only ones capable of harming her," Betty said. "But our abilities are bad matches for hers. It would be better if I could master fire."


    "I still think that''s unlikely."


    "Perhaps I can manage it under stress."


    "Betty you almost died a second ago and your reaction was to say "that''s extremely frightening" as if a tv show you liked wasn''t available. You are a wonderful caring person, but you aren''t an emotional one. I believe fire will be the last element you master. Fire, as I''ve said, is the element of intense feeling. Rage. Passion."


    "Lust?" Betty said, sitting up.


    "Yes I suppose that''s implied with passion. Why? Your voice sounded strange just there..."


    "A fake!" Sylvanandra screamed. "YOU TRIED TO BLUFF ME WITH AN OVERSIZED FIREWORK!?"


    "You''re just mad it worked!" Goldie shouted back. "But uh, yeah that''s my only trick. Betty I could use some help here!"


    Betty was sitting on the ground with her legs crossed, hands in her lap, eyes closed. Quakfina regained her duck form and shouted.


    "Betty is working on something!" The duck called out to Goldie. "Concentrate your lights! They''re a good match against her shadow magic!"


    Goldie groaned, but she gathered all her lights together into a tight ball, swinging them like a club. Between that and the darting attacks of the flaming Midnight, they were keeping Sylvanandra busy...for now.


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    "They cannot keep this up, Betty. I hope you have a good plan. What are you doing?"


    "I am contemplating the nature of my emotions."


    Because there had always been one emotion Betty had felt strongly. In an odd, sideways kind of way. And not in a way that others would immediately notice. But the truth was it was on her mind all the time. Her thoughts dwelled on Tyler, but he wasn''t the catalyst. Not the cause. It had been a part of her long before she''d ever met Tyler.


    "Evan isn''t the only degenerate pervert in our group!"


    "You said that so proudly."


    It had only ever been theoretical, of course. She''d never had someone to experiment with. It had been snippets of things she''d found online, it had been people she''d seen and found attractive, it had been books she''d read and things she''d watched, all fueling wild fantasies. But that was just it. They were WILD fantasies. Wild and free and emotional. Intense emotion was difficult for her. Even this had burned deep beneath the surface. But it had BURNED.


    She supposed she should think of Trevor, because they had an arrangement. And he certainly played a part in her thoughts, but he wasn''t alone. Now wasn''t the time to hold back. Her memory and imagination provided a thousand possibilities, and then thousands more. Men and women in leather and lace and rubber or even nothing at all. Within her mind her body became the focus of a million billion hands and mouths and lips and teeth and fingers as she let lust overcome her.


    It burned.


    She felt her nodes respond (in more ways than one, she thought, in solidarity with Evan) and the fire flared within her. When her eyes opened, she saw the fight had changed. Midnight had turned into a lion with tiger stripes, glowing red fire streaked with black, a mane of flames around his head. NOW he was doing some real damage, Sylvanandra on the back foot as the flaming lion beat her back with burning claws.


    "UGH!!" Quakfina retched, gagging and clutching her stomach. "Oh, sweet gods, no, how, how could one human mind even HOLD all that!?"


    "You can read my private thoughts?" Betty asked.


    "Private!? Betty you were screaming. Screaming obscenities. That was the filthiest, most depraved...I don''t even...I don''t think human bodies can even actually do that one with the lawn flamingos...."


    "Actually with enough lubrication at the correct temperature, I estimate Trevor would be capable of it provided we--"


    "Stop immediately!" Quakfina said. "Stop. I do not want to hear the details of your planned trysts."


    "I had forgotten you were an angel." Betty said. "I suppose to a heavenly being this would be quite alarming. But these are ordinary mortal thoughts."


    "I am an angel to a goddess who has a been around more than a few times! I promise you your lust is exceptional."


    "Indeed it is!" A new voice said. It was a high pitched squeak, but also somehow...sultry. Quakfina and Betty looked up to see a woman. Well, mostly a woman. No, definitely a women. Extremely a woman. Those curves were impossible. Those proportions were impossible. She was a deranged sexual fantasy made flesh. More deranged than the fantasies Betty had just been having.


    She was less than two feet tall. She had white hair, not the pale white of old age but a glistening silver that spoke of health and youth. Two thin horns curved up from her forehead. Her skin was red, her luscious lips a deep purple. She wore two purple strips of fabric, one across her chest and one as a short skirt around her waist. She stayed in the air by flapping a pair of black bat wings.


    "And now look what you''ve summoned," Quakfina glared. "An imp."


    "An imp from the domain of lust!" The imp said in her high pitched yet sexy voice. Betty wasn''t sure how she was doing that. "Making me a spirit of fire and lust. A very powerful spirit of fire and lust, attracted here by your sinfully sweet fantasies. And that rack. Damn. I mean damn. I literally spoke to the succubus queen a couple of days ago and she''d be jealous. So how about you accept me as your familiar for the element of fire, I show you a few tricks only a forked tongue can pull off, then we..."


    "I do not have time for that," Betty said.


    "Yeah yeah big fight, so just a quick little thing to seal the deal and we''re good to go!"


    "No. I do not have time to weigh the implications. I am currently in a fight."


    "Good girl!" Quakfina said. "You can''t trust hellspawn!"


    With a pained yowl Midnight crashed into the dirt beside them. Goldie hurried over to their side as a shadow loomed over them. Sylvanandra rose high into the treetops in a web of vines and shadow, snapping flytrap mouths writhing around her like snakes.


    "I''m sorry am I bothering you? Because y''know, I''m like a really big deal. A super powerful sorceress who''s here to kill you and I kind of feel like I''m being ignored! Did you really think one unusually warm cat was enough to beat me!?"


    "I am sorry," Betty said. "But there has kind of been a lot going on. I guess you got lost in the background."


    "I''ll kill you!" Sylvanandra shrieked, the plant heads descending.


    "Tell you what!" The imp said. "Call this a free sample!"


    She took a deep breath and fire crackled around her tony frame. Them it flew out, all at once, a white hot beam of energy that turned everything in it''s path to dust. Sylvanandra''s duplicate screamed and vanished in smoking ash.


    It smelled kind of like muffins.

 Chapter 50: Duck Hunt: Measuring Contest

    A little to her own surprise, not yet used to her own enhanced abilities, Ammeline landed on the forest floor just fine. She''d definitely been expecting to crash and die, that being the normal thing to do when flung god knows how far into a tree filled forest. You know, what people expected of you. When she''d flipped and landed on her feet, knees bent a little to absorb the impact, she had been flagrantly disregarding tradition. No doubt her mother would disapprove.


    Well she was used to that. Ammeline had never let her mother''s disapproval get in the way before, not when it really mattered. And while landing safely on the forest floor rather than crashing down in a mangled heap of pulped flesh and broken bones might be considered a faux-pas she preferred safe landings, thanks all the same, see you at next week''s luncheon, I like your hat.


    These were not perhaps the sanest thoughts to be having, she knew, but she wasn''t giggling like an idiot yet so she couldn''t be completely insane. Alright, it was time to focus on the problem at hand rather than the fact that so many magical encounters with homicidal maniacs in such a short space of time was making her to crazy. Break it down into bullet points.


    Point one, they''d been attacked by a deranged elf who could summon killer plants.


    Point two, this was especially worrying because they were in a forest, heavily associated with both elves and plants.


    Point three, she was alone, with no way to find the others or know their condition.


    Point four, she had a choice to make, whether to try to find the others to lend assistance or to leave the forest to seek help.


    Point four was the one that required immediate action, so she focused in on it. There were two problems with point four. The first problem was she wasn''t actually sure how to contact help once she was out of the forest. Sure, the logical thing to do was to call in the agents who had covered everything up in the fight with Danny, but how? She couldn''t just call and ask fir "that spooky lady from the government." And how far was it to someplace she could call for help anyway? They got here by magic duck, how far did she have to go to get cell service?


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    The second problem was that she had zero idea how to get anywhere she decided to go in the first place. She had a vague, very vague, idea of the direction she''d been thrown from. She could walk the opposite way...but she had no way of knowing if that way was just deeper into the forest. And there was no way to...


    A massive gout of fire shot towards the sky in the distance.


    "Alright!" Ammeline said out loud. "Someone over there is fighting and might need some help, so I will go that way! And me talking to myself is by no means another signal that I am going insane! Ahahahahahahahaha...no, Ammeline, no, you''re doing the crazy laughter thing you will NOT do the crazy laughter thing you will take your sword and go help! I will... where''s my sword?"


    She looked around on the forest floor, horrified she might have dropped it while she was flying through the air. But no, no, she''d been gripping it then, she was sure. It must have dropped when she landed, so it should be around here someplace. She looked around for it, and stopped. Well, she''d found her sword.


    But uhm, yeah. Well. That was her sword alright. She had found her sword. Yep. Her sword. Right there. Right there, being held up by...


    "Ahahahahahahahaha!" Ammeline said. "I have decided it will be easier to just go insane."


    The sword was being held by three tiny women, each less than a foot tall. They wore dresses made of leaves, and they had long pointed ears. Long for their size at least. Two if them had pale skin with a greenish tint to it, as if they''d once been fully green and had the color washed out. The third was colored the deep brown of old bark. They stared back up at Ammeline with shocked expressions, then at each other.


    "Cheese it!" One exclaimed, and they all bolted into the forest carrying away Anmeline''s sword.


    "Hey wait!" Ammeline called after them. "Come back, I needed that!"


    She tried to chase after them, but the three tiny women vanished into the underbrush. She gave up after a few steps, staring into the forest.


    "Yeah!" A wicked voice cackled behind her. "You DID need that!"


    Ammeline turned to see Sylvanandra stepping out of the shadows. But not completely out of the shadows. The shadows came with her, whisped off her like smoke.


    "You''re actually pretty scary with that sword. And thus duplication spell...well, it''s got limitations. Hate to admit it, but it does. I can''t give all my powers to all my copies. So one of them was going to have to have ONLY shadow magic, or just about. So who do I send that after? Shadow magic is a lot better for sneaking around than fighting. So how about...you?


    "Your an object infuser type right? Sure you''re pretty scary with a sword in your hand, but WITHOUT it you''re maybe a little bit stronger and faster than a regular person. So I infused this copy with just enough forest magic to make the forest sprites do what I want, and you lose your sword! And shadow magic is pretty good at making blades so BOOM! Check it out!"


    The shadows swirled in her hand, molding into a curved sword of slithering darkness.


    "I get to say the line I get to say the line I get to say the line...okay...ready...here we go...wait for it...Mine''s BIGGER!"

 Chapter 51: Duck Hunt, Measuring Contest, Part 2

    It would perhaps be best to describe Ammeline''s response as disappointment. She crossed her arms, staring at the elven sorceress with half lidded eyes, her gaze dripping with disdain.


    "Oh dear," she sighed. Well you''re certainly putting a lot of effort into your dialogue, sweetie. I''m sure you''ll get there eventually."


    "Hey!" Sylvanandra hissed. "No judging my quips!"


    "If you don''t want them to get judged you shouldn''t say them. And maybe you shouldn''t say them at all. I mean, I''ll admit to having chuckled at phallic humor once or twice in the past that was very weak. I''m not even holding my weapon at the moment. So if I don''t have my own symbolic phallus, what is yours bigger THAN? It might have worked if I were one of the men, just barely, but under the circumstances it was mostly sad."


    Sylvanandra opened her mouth to speak, but Ammeline cut her off.


    "No, there isn''t any way to make a joke on that sentence turning "circumstances" into "circumcised" so don''t even try."


    "Oh shut up!" Sylvanandra glared at her. "You don''t know! You don''t know that''s what I was going to say! And who the hell are you to judge my fight dialogue anyway?"


    "Ahahahahahahahaha!" Ammeline laughed triumphantly, striking a pose with her foot up on a fallen log. "I am Ammeline Trent! A true American princess! Writer of wrongs! Warrior for justice! Future United States senator! And the woman who will defeat you!"


    Sylvanandra flourished her blade of eerie shadows.


    "And how are you going to do that without your weapon?"


    "Iiiiiiiiiii will think of something!"


    Sylvanandra sneered and lunged with the shadowy blade. Ammeline ducked out of the way and hurried off into the forest.


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    "You can''t run forever!!" Sylvanandra called after her, but Ammeline had a fencers quick movements and was able to lose the elf in the foliage. For now. She was under no illusion she could avoid the clash forever. She just had to find a way to win it, that was all.


    Magic had come very easily to Ammeline Trent. In the end it fit her self image, to have magical powers. She''d accepted things when her powers first manifested readily, and the part of her that had dreamed of becoming some heroic knight when she first picked up a fencing sword had rejoiced. It wasn''t a fantasy anymore.


    But of course that came with a price. This wasn''t a tournament when a loss would mean no medal and a disappointed team. She could die. Others could die. She''d wanted to be a hero fighting great battles, and it was time to put her money where her mouth was. Which was fair enough, but in all of those heroic fantasies she''d always had her sword.


    "I wish I had my sword!" Ammeline muttered aloud.


    "We can''t give it to you!" A tiny voice said. Three tiny voices, in unison. Ammeline followed the noise and saw the three tiny women she''d seen before. Forest spirits, she thought the elf had called them? Whatever they were they looked almost guilty.


    "Why not?" Ammeline asked. "Is it because you''re loyal to elves?"


    "Nope!"


    Nuh uh!"


    "No way! Elves are big jerks actually. We''re hoping you win."


    "So why did you steal it for her?"


    "Because she''s Leaftouched."


    "Old magic."


    "One with the woods. We have to listen to her."


    So not an elf thing, just a magic thing. Alright. Not much help there.


    "But it''s okay!


    "She messed up!"


    "We stole the wrong sword!"


    "What do you mean?"


    "It''s not even sharpened!


    "Not magical at all!"


    "Just a stick, really. That can''t be the weapon she was worried about!"


    "Oh!" Ammeline said, the pieces clicking into place I''m her head. "Oh you''re right! It''s not! HEY! ELF! I want to talk with you!"


    "There you are!" Sylvanandra hopped down from the treetops, still clutching her shadowy blade. She was a good distance away from Ammeline, having passed her while Ammeline was talking to the spirits, but she closed the distance quickly. Ammeline reached down, picking something off the forest floor and bringing it up, blocking at the last moment a strike that would have taken off her head.


    "A stick!?" The elf gasped in fury and confusion. "How are you blocking my shadow sword with a stick!?"


    "You should know more about magic than me. But as I understand it, I just need a weapon to focus my magic. It doesn''t have to be specifically my fencing sword. Anything I can fence with is fine!"


    The two of them clashed, shadow blade blocked at every turn by a stick picked up off the ground.


    "The rest of it is the fencing skill I''ve picked up through years! You''re not so tough, I could beat you with a twig!"


    "No! I refuse! I don''t care if this is my weakest duplicate I will not be beaten with a stick!"


    Sylvanandra screamed and swung wide with the sword, the shadows that made it up billowing like smoke. The blade grew huge, slicing through trees around them...but leaving Ammeline untouched. She ducked under the blade and thrust a dozen times with her stick, poking ugly wounds in the elf replica''s body. The sorceress struggled to her feet, but Ammeline was already standing over her holding the trunk of one of the smaller trees Sylvanandra had just cut down. Energy crackled around the lof, forming the shape of a gigantic cleaver.


    "Oh and before I forget...mine''s bigger."


    Ammeline brought the log down on Sylvanandra''s head with crushing finality.

 Chapter 52: The Second Duckinterlude

    Sylvanandra, the real one, the main body back in the clearing where this whole mess began, cursed and punched the dirt. Then she started screaming.


    "Bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit! How!? What is WRONG with these little shits!? They''re too strong!"


    "They ARE remarkably talented young men and women," Dr. Myrden chuckled. "My daughter not the least of them. But your repeated losses aren''t because of that. They''re because you underestimated them. And because you''re more tired out from the power struggle over the man eating plant than you''re letting yourself admit. I can sense the forest almost as well as you can. It''s my forest after all. You''ve only got one duplicate left. And it''s headed towards the two most powerful magical sources in the forest, would be..."


    "The asshole who took our genie and the Asian guy," The elven sorceress growled. "I know! But you know what? That''s fine. I''ll kill them, then I''ll mop up the rest of these little shits. I should have done that in the first place, why didn''t I just make one...because you phrased the challenge so I''d have to, you crafty old bastard."


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    "I still prefer Quack."


    It had been a classic wizard''s challenge. He was old and knew things. Things Sylvanandra and her boss would very much like to know. Things like...


    "I still don''t think you really know where to find a second genie."


    "If I didn''t our magical pact would have broken," Dr. Myrden pointed out. "The wording was very specific."


    "Yeah yeah. Like the part about allowing no harm to come to you during the challenge, so I''d have to heal you."


    "I WAS very proud of that one. You''d just about killed me. Big monster plant teeth will do that to an old man."


    "And then your challenge specified splitting off duplicates."


    "Look I don''t know what you''re complaining about. If you win, you get Jenny. If you lose, you get the location of the genie of the ring. And all it costs you is some magic power and not harming us if your duplicates are beaten.


    "Yeah well you''ll be a grease spot in a minute. Just wait until you see all the power I pump into this last duplicate. I''ll regain the right to grind you into the dirt any second now."


    She looked at Dr. Myrden out of the corner of her eye.


    "And I might have a few tricks too. You''re not the only one who can play with the terms  of a magical contract, old man."

 Chapter 53: Duck Hunt, Flipping the Script

    Kyle was pissed. Absolutely boiling.


    "Look man," Trevor said as they stomped through the forest. "I get it. You''re worried about Jenny..."


    "I''m not worried about Jenny."


    "Kyle, buddy, you just walked through a tree. And you didn''t even notice. A couple of them, actually."


    Kyle turned around to look. Trevor was right, he''d just stormed right through a couple of smaller trees without even noticing. It looked like a dinosaur had stomped through. He actually hadn''t noticed, because he''d apparently become that much stronger than the average tree. And yet somehow, it still wasn''t strong enough. He took a couple of deep breaths to steady himself, and when he talked his voice was...calmer.


    "Jenny is fine," Kyle said. "I think she was fighting a little while ago, but she''s fine. I can feel her through our connection. That''s where I''m headed. I''m worried about everyone else, but that''s not what''s got me angry. It''s that I recognize the damn pattern."


    "What pattern?" Trevor blinked.


    "She''s Nightmare Fox."


    "From...from Forbidden Garden? The anime? You mean she''s like, secretly the voice actress or something?"


    "No of course not!" Kyle snapped, then got control of himself again. "Sorry. But come on, Trev. No that''s not what I meant. Think about it."


    Trevor took a moment to think about it.


    "Okay I mean she''s a second super powerful bad guy to show up after you got your powers," Trevor admitted. "But I mean... Nightmare Fox was secretly a dude, he was the king of Shade Mountain and she''s some kind of terrorist, and Kai had three girlfriends by the time they fought so it''s not identical..."


    "Second bad guy is enough. This is going to keep happening, isn''t it? And I know everybody told me it would, but...but I was cocky. I just felt so much stronger. And whatever I thought and said, deep down...deep down I felt like I was powerful enough to handle it. Handle anything. And now a deranged elf dropped out of nowhere and literally blew everyone up. And now I have to beat her."


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    "I mean we at least have to get away," Trevor nodded. "And she''s not just gonna let us go. I figure some kind of fighting retreat is our best bet."


    "No. We need to BEAT her." Kyle clenched his fists. "Beat her for real. Because if we don''t, it''ll set a pattern. There''s two kinds of heroes, Trevor. There''s Kais who beat their bad guys and then there''s Kogoros whonever win."


    "Wait hold on. I''m having trouble catching up here. Kogoro from Blue Blood Blade?"


    "Yes."


    "We have to beat the insane elf sorceress because of an anime you don''t like?"


    "Yes. Catch up."


    "I am not the one not making sense here! What the hell does all this have to do with anything?"


    "Do you remember why I don''t like BBB?" Kyle asked. "Kogoro never wins. Never. He constantly gets his ass kicked and runs away, or has some insanely mixed victory, or gets saved by another character at the last second. Or do you remember that one time, in the Tower of Dreams? When Dark Bell didn''t just win, he completed his entire evil plan, then Kogoro got a new power up form, then Dark Bell BEAT HIM AGAIN, then he let them all go because his plan was completed and it didn''t even matter anymore?"


    "Yeah I remember you said that was when you stopped watching."


    "Well I plan on being Kai. I''m going to win my fights. People are going to be WORRIED about fighting me. People will think twice before they do because it means messing with Kyle Anderman. I will NOT be smacked around by every magical asshole who thinks they''re hot shit. I will NOT be Kogoro!"


    Trevor looked at Kyle. He wasn''t sure how healthy it was to compare everything in life to an anime, but he had to admit their lives had been pretty similar to an anime the past few months. And he could see Kyle''s point, kind of. There was definitely a strategic value to letting it be known they couldn''t be messed with.


    "Just trust me on this. I can feel it."


    "Yeah okay," Trevor nodded. "But that''s not all I can feel. I guess you''ll get your chance to fight right now."


    It has been said that those practiced in the martial arts can, through their deep connection to the universe and the energy that unites all things, sense the approach of an enemies life force. Their training had indicated there was a great deal of truth to that. But Trevor''s latest observation probably had a lot more to do with the way the ground was shaking, the screaming, and the billowing clouds of leaves and darkness crashing towards them through the forest.


    "That''s not her," Kyle said. "Some kind of copy."


    "Yeah." That one was the mystical sense thing for real, promise.


    "I''m not losing to a copy."


    It was a hell of a copy. As it slammed through the trees they could see it was more of a distorted wraith made from withered leaves and branches, twisted and gnarled, cloaked in darkness. It had a face like a dessicated corpse, dark points of eerie green light glowing in the dark pits of it''s eye sockets, as if they were down an impossibly deep well.


    Kyle took one step forwards and punched it into shards of wood.


    Trevor looked from the pile of sawdust and dwindling magic on the ground back up to Kyle, who''d barely moved.


    "DAMN!"


    "Yeah sorry I took all the glory."


    "No, no way man it''s fine."


    "Good. Let''s go kill this bitch for real."

 Chapter 54: Duck Blind

    What the hell?" Sylvanandra gasped, as the last of her duplicates was destroyed. "No seriously, what the hell was that!?"


    "Me winning I think," Dr. Myrden said. "I could say it was because you split yourself up too much, or because you didn''t split your powers effectively between your duplicates, but really it''s because you underestimated them all."


    "But it''s not fair!" She whined. "I should have been able to kill at least ONE of them!!!"


    She stood up and paced round the clearing, arms crossed over her chest. Dr. Myrden got the impression it was because she didn''t know what to do with them. Her eyes were sparkling with magic, crackling with power...but by her own oath, she she couldn''t do anything with it. Bargains like the one they''d made were stronger than any being in existence. They were fundamental laws, the rules by which reality functioned. She would keep her promise, it was physically impossible not to.


    "Tough duckfeathers," Dr Myrden said. "You made an oath. Keep it. Leave us alone."


    She crossed her arms and glared.


    "You made an oath too. Give. Where''s the ring?"


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    "The ring containing the only other known surviving genie can be found on Zago Island."


    Her eyes crackled with power again.


    "Listen here old man," she snarled. "Telling us an artifact nobody can find is on an island that doesn''t exist is is breaking our pact. I''ll go back to killing people right now."


    "The exact latitude and longitude are right here. A little south of Ireland, Cromlaire ought to love that. Instructions for accessing it too, I''m sure you can find the ingredients for the eye drops that let you see the island. You''ll have to piss off the Fae Lords of Tyr Na Nog, but since when has that bothered you? But that''s all I''m helping you with. Getting to the island and finding the ring are all up to you."


    She took the piece if paper he offered. When had he written this? Probably while she was distracted fighting with her duplicates. She was pretty sure the island would have curses, monsters, horrible traps... probably all three of those and more. But he had fulfilled his oath. She was fury bound to leave without harming anyone. She hated it. So when she sensed someone coming, she charged at the old wizard''s throat with a blade of shadow magic.


    His reaction was mostly confusion. She literally couldn''t hurt him. They both knew it. Unfortunately, others didn''t. Kyle burst into the clearing like a rocket, his fist slamming into the side of her face and sending her flying.


    "Back the hell off!" Kyle roared.


    "Kyle no!" Dr. Myrden gasped. "It''s a trick! She..."


    "Oh look." Sylvanandra sat up from where she''d landed on the ground, a huge grin on her face. "I''ve been attacked."


    Power like the forest at night erupted from her body.

 Chapter 55 Duck Duel

    A dome of leaves and branches sprouted up around Dr. Myrden, smothering his protests in a cloud of leaves. Both forest magic and shadow magic excelled at silence, and the old wizard was still too weakened to break out of a spell like this.


    He hadn''t seen it. Hadn''t even thought about it. She''d tricked him. She''d come off as so childish. So immature. So arrogant in her own power. It hadn''t even occurred to him she would have a backup plan in case she lost.


    Magical contracts were brutal, but fair. Kyle''s actions couldn''t count as breaking the contract, he wasn''t aware of it. And she could break her contract to defend her own life. She''d made Kyle think she was going to kill him, Kyle wouldn''t back down. He''d fight to kill her, or close enough that the oath wouldn''t stop her from defending herself.


    She would kill Kyle over a technicality.


    Sylvanandra was having a little more trouble with her plan than she''d thought. The genie''s master was PISSED. Maybe it was anime style power of friendship, how dare she touch his mentor kind of thing? That was definitely part of it, but there was something else there. Something beyond that.


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    The point is, he was tougher than she''d expected. Kyle came at her like a bulldozer. He clearly wasn''t an experienced fighter, but he had enough raw power to put her in the back foot. Especially when she''d used so much power on creating her duplicates. He was besting her back. But she still had a few tricks...


    All of which she promptly forgot when a huge glowing dragon plummeted from the sky towards her face. It only took a split second for the memories of her duplicates to surface. An illusion from that blonde, who barely new magic. Not a threat. She let it pass harmlessly over her.


    Something burning and covered with claws hit her in the face. The summoner''s cat. It had been hiding IN the illusion. That was... significantly worse than she''d been prepared for. Sylvanandra slammed into the ground in a burning crater.


    "You guys!" Kyle said. "You''re all alright!"


    As she got to her feet, Sylvanandra saw that they were. All of Kyle''s little friends had shown up to the party. She was surrounded. If things continued like this, she would lose. A smile crept across her face, and power flared up inside of her.


    All she had to do was get serious, and she could kill them all.

 Chapter 56: Duck Duck Heroes

    Kyle watched as the elf sorceress disappeared in a tangle of vines. She didn''t even stand up from where he''d thrown her, the vines just grew up from the ground around her body. At first he thought she was escaping, which would have been perfectly fine with him. He was determined not to be a pushover, but he wasn''t bloodthirsty or a battle maniac. Having a powerful enemy run away would have been great. But that moment of hesitation gave her time to complete her spell, and the vines just grew up and up and up until the tangled mass settled into the form of an enormous woman.


    It was vaguely in Sylvanandra''s shape, towering over the trees. The feminine shape had no mouth, just a pair of eyes that streamed shadowy smoke. The same smoke streamed from every crack, every place the vines weren''t flush against each other.


    "You know, I could see this turning into a new fetish."


    Evan''s voice. Kyle turned to greet his friend, but that reunion was immediately run over by another. Jenny tackled him, hugging him tight.


    "You''re okay!" She said happily.


    "So are you!" Kyle laughed, hugging her back.


    "Another guy might feel a little insulted," Evan said. "You know, you know a guy all his life and the first hot genie he meets you''re suddenly second fiddle. Ah who am I kidding, I''d do the same giant fist!"


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    They all jumped out of the way of Sylvanandra''s giant descending fist. It crashed into the earth, kicking up dust and debris. The elf had chosen to not politely wait for them to finish their reunion and had attacked while they were talking. Kyle wondered idly when jumping out of the way of earth shattering attacks had become so easy and normal for him. At the same time it occurred to him that having the warm, soft body of a genie pressed against his side had also become normal for him, and he decided it was a pretty good tradeoff.


    When they landed, Trevor was already waiting for them.


    "Hi. I''m here too."


    "Thanks," Evan said. "We''re a big group it can get easy to lose track."


    "Still missing Tanya, Ammeline, Goldie, and Betty."


    "Noted. Now what do we do?"


    "Keep hitting her until she stops moving," Kyle said.


    "Which would be easier if we had fire magic," Jenny shook her head. "But none of us actually use..."


    A beam of fire roared through the air and drilled a hole through the giant''s wooden arm. Betty and Goldie ran out of the trees, accompanied by a tiger sized Moonlight flickering with flame, a small red horned woman floating in the air, and an extremely put out looking duck.


    "Or Betty could have leaned fire magic since we last saw her."


    "I have accessed the power of my lust," Betty said in a monotone. "To fire that last beam, I pictured Trevor with his leg bent over--"


    "Please no," Trevor said.


    "Anyway I am glad you''re all alive," Betty said.


    "Ahahahahahahaha! I am alive as well!"


    Ammeline ran from the treeline, her sword at her hip and a tree held over her head. She swung the tree in an arc and it shattered against the giant''s knee, making Sylvanandra fall to one knee.


    "Alright!" Kyle said. "We can hurt it!"


    "I actually can''t," Goldie pointed out.


    "Why not go try and free the old man?" Evan gestured to the imprisoning dome of vines and branches. "And hey, I''m glad to see you."


    "Uh yeah," Goldie said. "You too. I''ll go see what I can do about Dr. Myrden."


    "Stronger than I thought," Sylvanandra laughed, climbing to her feet. "That''s been the theme today. But I can still kill you all!"


    "We can take her!" Kyle said. "Evan, why are you laughing?"


    "I''m just thinking," Evan giggled. "Big scary monster, all of us lined up..of this was a TV show that''s where we''d end the episode."

 Chapter 57 Duck Trap

    It''s difficult to coordinate this many people in a fight. Especially in a situation like Kyle and his friends find themselves in, where everyone has highly individual powers and no experience coordinating. So nobody even tried, they just poured onto the gigantic tree woman form Sylvanandra had taken. As had been a theme all battle, they did much better than she''d expected.


    One of the advantages of their highly individualized powers was that they fell into roles almost immediately, just because it was the best use of their powers available. Kyle and Trevor gravitated towards the legs, smashing and crashing through the wood. Evan jumped and darted around, smashing wood everywhere he could reach. Moonlight did the same in his fiery tiger form. Jenny and Betty stayed back, Jenny firing her magical beams and Betty directing the new creature she''d summoned to pepper the monster with bolts of fire. What was up with that thing anyway? It looked like a tiny burning porn star...nope, better not to ask with Betty.


    "Ammeline!" Kyle called out. "Have you got another tree?"


    "No!" Ammeline says, pulling her fencing sword. "But I''m going up! I''m going to find her and stab her in the face!"


    "She didn''t even say..." Evan began, but Ammeline cut him off.


    "Ahahahaha! A new legend will be born! The princess heroine! Jacqueline the Giant Killer!"


    "Yeah that," Evan sighed. "I should have known not to hope."


    Ammeline and Evan both began using their enhanced bodies to dart and leap up the giant''s side, while Kyle and Trevor worked at her legs. It was an incredible display of magical combat ability, especially from people who had only learned about magic a short while ago. But it simply wasn''t enough.


    First of all, their lack of coordination showed. Powerful and talented individually, they weren''t working well as a group. Evan and Ammeline frequently had to duck out of the way to avoid being hit by stray ranged attacks from Betty and Jenny, interfering with their own attempts to injure the giant. And second...even weakened, their opponent was just that much better than they were. More powerful still than all the duplicates they''d fought behind, and more experienced.


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    At first the giant barely fought back, just flailed and stomped around. There was something strange about how it moved, almost like it was afraid to hurt Goldie and Doctor Myrden, but just as Kyle was starting to think that and follow the path of logic down which it led, Sylvanandra laughed. And unleashed her real attack.


    The giant had been a trick. A trap. Once most of them were fully engaged with it, the vines and branches that made it up reached out and grabbed them. It was like fighting a bucket of tar. Their blows sunk into it, the vines wrapped around them, and even though they fought they were pulled inside. The only one relatively safe was midnight, because he was partly made of fire...but now that the trap was sprung the vines tossed him away as easily as they now deflected Betty and Jenny''s attacks.


    Kyle cursed himself for an idiot. He''d felt so noble and heroic standing up to the giant. He''d had "Crimson Bow and Arrow" playing in the back of his head. She''d counted on that. She''d given them a big monster to fight, which should have been the first sign. Forest and shadow, those were her specialties. Not Kaiju. He was still arguing with the part of him that wanted to just give up when the cavalry arrived.


    Or maybe the florists. It took Kyle a moment to understand what he was seeing.


    Tanya stood at the edge of the forest clearing, panting and bloody, her arm outstretched. She had just cast the same flower spell she''d shown them before, but she had done it from inside Sylvanandra''s titanic tree woman form. A bouquet of crazy colored flowers the size of telephone poles erupted from the monster''s chest...right where Sylvanandra had been inside it. She flew from inside the creature screaming and cursing.


    "What the fuck!? Where even were you? This is bullshit, I''ll-"


    She never got to finish what she was going to say. All of them had been released from the bonds of the grasping vines, but Kyle had moved fastest, crouching down and leaping with every ounce of strength he had in him. He shot into the air and his fist met Sylvanandra''s with an audible crack, sending her tumbling backwards through the air bleeding from her mouth.


    He let out a triumphant scream as she began to plummet towards the ground.

 Chapter 58: Interlude: All of Time and Space (Inclusive)

    Time and space are complicated.


    This may sound like a stupid thing to say, like describing water as wet or fire as an extreme response to not getting whipped cream on your coffee. But it goes further than that. Deeper.


    Time and space are complicated.


    They are not simply unusual, or odd, or overwhelming, or baroque, or Byzantine, or any of the other words you could find if you looked up your own thesaurus. They are a level of complexity beyond human comprehension. Or elf or genie, for that matter. But even though genie''s can''t understand it, they can alter it. This has consequences, many of them unintended.


    Somewhere, in the infinite clockwork of all that was, will be and is, there was an assumption, based on a likelyhood that might have happened about a year from now, that Kyle would lose the fight. When he won it, the clockwork...shifted.


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    This is not uncommon. This happens all the time. People are always making choices, defying expectations, and shifting the clockwork of reality in one direction or the other. And no one ever notices. For anyone to notice, someone with some understanding of the workings of it all would have to be staring into the cosmic all at the exact tangle of time and space connected to that specific change at that specific moment.


    A man sat in a room made of rings. Metal rings of every different color and size, roughly forming an orb around him. He hovered in the air, arms and legs crossed, his eyes closed, the rings spinning around him in a dance of incalculable complexity.


    At the exact second Kyle''s fist impacted Sylvanandra''s chin, he opened one eye.


    "Huh," the old man muttered, in the ancient language of Uzbedi. "That''s weird."

 Chapter 59: Interlude: One smaller persons bedroom.

    Back in town, someone is lying in bed, looking up at the stars.


    You''ve met them before, but you probably don''t remember. That seems to be their lot in life, noticed briefly once and then quickly forgotten. Even more so now, ever since that weird, weird night.


    The night with that big orange monster, and everybody throwing fireballs, and the explosion. Ever since that night things had been really weird.


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    Even fate had basically forgotten them. The one that spooled out for them in the old way of things wasn''t particularly cruel, but it wasn''t very kind either. It was more of what they had. Obscurity. Ignorance. No connections to anyone, really.


    They shot straight up in bed when they felt it. Something had changed! Something had...had shifted. Everything was somehow subtly different.


    It was the exact moment Kyle''s fist hit Sylvanandra''s chin. They had no idea they''d brushed against the power to sense back itself. A few moments later, when the shifting sensation did not return, they rolled over and went to sleep.


    But everything still felt different. Across the universe, thing slotted into place.


    And the third of Kyle''s wishes was granted.

 Chapter 60: Interlude: Nowhere at all

    This place was nowhere. Neither existence, nor the sucking expanse of the void. It wasn''t really a place you could see, or touch, or even understand in any way people with actual physical bodies were capable of. Maybe it''s better to just picture a big, white emptiness and call it close enough.


    In the nothingness was...well, it wasn''t really anything. An almost thing. Nearly half an idea. But it had awareness, which bothered it. It didn''t want awareness. And wasn''t that an annoying spiral? Without awareness it wouldn''t want anything at all, so it wanted not to want what it wanted not to want....


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    It was getting a headache, and it didn''t even have a head.


    It felt the moment Kyle punched Sylvanandra in the face. At least that was progress. But still, things weren''t right. It was still here. For that matter, it still WAS. This was the problem.


    It was going to have to try existing. It didn''t want to. Existing would cause all kinds of problems. But it really didn''t see a way around it. It was going to have to exist long enough to figure out what was going on.


    Dammit. Well, no point in wasting time. It reached out of nothing until it touched....


    Well, something. Anything at all.


    And if you found all that confusing, don''t worry. It was. Existing can suck sometimes.

 Chapter 61 Ducks Victorious

    Sylvanandra spiraled to the ground below Kyle, still conscious but reeling from the blow. And from the shock. She''d been weakened, certainly, but she''d never really considered losing. For one thing, her plan had been working! Of course it had, the power gap was huge. Except, of course, in raw physical strength. All it had taken was one moment of distraction and damn, the genie''s master hit like a truck.


    It was kinda hot, if she was being honest. She''d never claimed to be particularly well adjusted. She tried to focus on the landing, but her limbs wouldn''t cooperate. She crumbled to the ground in a heap. Well, that sucked...but if she was gonna die, at least she''d go out with the advantage. When Kyle killed her, her oath would die too, and any limitations placed on the boss and the others would disappear as well. Kyle was falling towards her right now, murder in his eyes.


    "Kyle don''t kill her!" Someone shouted, and Sylvanandra almost laughed. She knew a man on a mission when she saw one. She''d been in a thousand fights to the death, there was no way....


    Kyle landed beside her, dropping his hands to his sides. His fist never landed.


    "Okay."


    "Okay!?" Sylvanandra sputtered, coughing up blood from her broken lip. She was pretty sure his punch had rattled her brain too, he could have crushed her skull like an egg why wouldn''t he? "Okay!? That''s it? What about righteous vengeance? From what I can tell you literally tore that Danny kid to pieces!"


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    "Yeah but it''s not like I like killing people," Kyle said. "And I trust Dr. Myrden."


    She looked up. Sure enough, the Goldie girl had somehow freed Dr. Myrden from the cage of vines and branches. She was surrounded, lying on the ground with a concussion, and she couldn''t even get these people to kill her.


    "Well...shit," she complained, dropping her head back the ground. Above her, the genie tackled her Master and wrapped her body around him almost like a snake. It was positively lewd, the way she was clinging onto him. Lucky bitch. And now she had to sit here and watch them make out until somebody decided to help her up.


    This sucked.


    Hours later, things were finally winding down. The camp was quiet. Everyone was sitting around the fire, though not close together. They''d splintered off alone, or into little groups. No one was in any condition to travel tonight, so they were going to rest up and head back in the morning.


    Trevor was by himself, staring into the fire. He''d taken the least damage, but he''d also done the least fighting. He''d barely even gotten the chance. He wasn''t sure how he felt about that. On the one hand, he didn''t like the idea that he hadn''t helped much. On the other hand, well... everyone was alright, and he didn''t really like fighting. He was going back and forth in his head when Betty''s shadow fell over him.


    "Hey!" He smiled up at her. "How are you doing?"


    "Come with me," Betty said, taking his hand. Trevor shrugged and followed her deeper into the forest. When they were out of view of the camp, she turned around and shoved him in the chest. It was like a raindrop hitting a boulder, in terms of strength, but Trevor was completely unprepared and she''s hit him at a weird angle. He fell to the forest floor, and before he knew what was happening Betty was sitting on top of him, straddling his waist.


    "Trevor," she said, in her usual monotone. "Lust has overcome me."

 Chapter 62: Ducks in the Brush

    Trevor looked up at Betty, his eyes wide. He was having trouble talking, having trouble thinking. Her warm weight pressing down on him occupied most of his thoughts. Still, he tried to focus. There were reasons he hadn''t brought things to this point. Things they needed to talk about.


    "Betty..." he started to say, but she put a finger on his lips.


    "No. Listen now." She told him. "In our recent battles, I had to dig deep within my mind. And what I found there was lust. A great many fantasies, most of them about you. I now also have two people to discuss this with. A literal demon and an angel on my shoulders, even if one of them is a duck. They both agree there is no reason we should not let lust overcome us. For different reasons, but still.


    "Also, in order to gain access to the fire aspect of my own nature, I had to think about you in a great many complicated and intense positions, and I have now become horny."


    The corners of Trevor''s mouth twitched up at the sides. She hadn''t broken her monotone the entire time. It was the most... the most Betty seduction ever. But still...


    "Betty I could hurt you," he said. "I''m strong Betty. Too strong. I know I mostly have to call on it on purpose, but sex... there''s a lot of involuntary muscle movement during sex, Betty. I''m scared I''ll lose control."


    "I see," Betty nodded. "I have two counterarguments. The first is that Kyle is almost as strong as you are, Jenny isn''t much stronger than me, and they have had no problems. But that is only my first, and less convincing, argument."


    "What''s the other one?"


    Instead of responding, Betty pulled off her sweater and the t-shirt underneath in one smooth motion. She had either pulled off her bra as well or she hadn''t been wearing one because her breasts spilled free, bouncing and swinging with a hypnotic motion. Trevor gulped, unable to pull his eyes away.


    "The answer to your concerns is simple. Do not attempt to control yourself. Let me control you."


    She slid Trevor''s shirt up and leaned down, her breasts mashing against his bare stomach.


    "You find my chest enticing." She kissed the muscles of his chest, and her lips felt like fire on his skin. "I find yours enticing as well."


    "Glurp," he managed.


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    "You will lie beneath me." She continued to kiss the muscles of his chest and stomach. "You will do as you are told. You will obey. And you will not lose control and hurt me, because be in control."


    "Yes ma''am," Trevor shivered.


    "And you will continue to call me ma''am, because that is extremely erotic. Take off your shirt."


    He hurried to comply. As he did he felt her weight lift off of him for a moments, and he realized she was taking off her pants. For a moment he kind of envied Kyle. This part must be a lot easier with telekinesis. But once the shirt was over his head, all the thoughts vanished.


    Betty was beautiful.


    He''d known that, of course. But it was different, having her here like this. Her body, normally hidden by the bulky clothes she wore, was now covered with nothing but moonlight. As his eyes traced her curves he realized he must be the only person to ever see her like this.


    "You''re beautiful," he said.


    "Ma''am," she reminded him, though her cheeks flushed at the compliment. It was typical that straddling him naked, a compliment was what made her cheeks flush. "You will remember to call me ma''am. Be a good boy."


    "Yes ma''am."


    She raised her hips again, her hands trailing down his stomach to his waistband, unbuttoning his fly and pulling down his zipper, pulling his cock out into the cold night air. He could have been in a glacier at this point and it would still have been rock hard in her hands.


    "As I expected it is a very commendable size," Betty said.


    Trevor wanted to laugh at, once again, Betty''s extremely Betty approach to the situation. But his mind was so full of swirling thoughts and emotions he felt jammed up. The quirky behavior that had attracted him to her at first. Her beautiful body. The warmth of her skin on his. And the fact that he''d never done this before. But then neither had she, she''d told him that. And besides...she was in control.


    "Thank you ma''am," he said.


    "I have many ideas for complicated things we could do with each other, but I believe it will be best to start simple."


    She lifted her hips one last time, lining his cock up between them. For a moment she didn''t just look beautiful, she looked... perfect. Trevor''s breath caught in his throat. Every line of her body, every caress off the moonlight, guided his vision down, lower, until it locked on the small trim triangle of hair between her legs.


    And then she descended on him and his world went white. Her body seemed to devour him, and he gasped aloud as she slammed down onto his cock, taking it all inside her in one swift motion. Beyond his control, his hand reached up to grab her hips. She didn''t object, just began grinding her hips against him.


    "Holy fuck," he gasped. "How...how did you just do that?"


    "I am borrowing the instincts of my new summon," she said. Her usual monotone voice was breathy, a little ragged. "A demon of lust itself. And you have forgotten to call me ma''am. Don''t you want to be a good boy?"


    "Yes ma''am. More than anything in the fucking world."


    "Then start moving your hips," she ordered, and he obliged, bucking up into her as she came down. "Twist them. Compliment my motions."


    "Fuck...dammit Betty, I''m gonna..."


    "No you are not," she informed him, the rhythm of her hips changing, the urgent pressure backing away.


    Around the second hour, he came to appreciate just how dangerous the sexual knowledge of a succubus could be. It would be wrong to say she used him. Every motion was with him, for him. What she did was lead him, drag him along almost. Somehow, with subtle motions of her body, she trained him to please her bit by bit.


    After all, she was in charge.


    And three times, the frozen, still mask of Betty''s face broke. Three times her body shuddered, clutching him inside, her face flushed down her breasts, her head pitched back and she let out a... it wasn''t quite a scream or a moan, something in between, a long low noise of intense ecstasy.


    The third time, she finally let him cum. He grabbed her hips and buried himself inside of her for their final, mutual moment of mindless bliss.


    Then they both collapsed to the forest floor, and she cuddled up to his bare chest. They lay there fir a long while, holding each other, their minds lost in the sparkling golden droplets of their afterglow as they slowly calmed down.


    "That was extremely satisfactory," Betty said.


    They had managed to keep the noise down for hours, left alone by their friends, but now they had to scramble to find their clothes. Trevor had burst out laughing.

 Chapter 62: Ducknoument Part 1

    Trevor and Betty had been gone for about an hour when Goldie looked into the area of the forest where they''d disappeared and sighed.


    "You know what they''re doing," Evan said with a grin.


    "Yes of course, Evan, everyone knows what they''re doing, were just not saying it out loud."


    "You wanna go join? Betty would probably let you."


    Goldie turned back to make a joke, and saw the oddest look on Evan''s face. She suddenly realized just how vulnerable he really was, what kind of wound that offhand joke had exposed. And she realized that if she pushed it, even the tiniest bit, the result would be calamity. Catastrophe.


    He hadn''t earned that. Today, at least. And it just so happened the truth was the perfect salve for Evan''s old wound.


    "No," she leaned back. "No I was actually thinking about you. We''re alone in the forest too tou know, everyone''s walked off."


    A look of ecstatic, incredulous glee spread across Evan''s face, but she held up a hand.


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    "Hold your horses there, lover boy. We will not be screwing tonight. Get that out of your head immediately."


    Evan''s expression went through a complex transformation, from disappoinment to fury to resignation.


    "Yeah alright, sorry, I should have..."


    "BUT!" She cut him off, "I am willing to make out a little bit."


    "Oh," Evan said. "How gracious of you."


    "It is, isn''t it?"


    "Not the most romantic, exactly..."


    "Well I mean if you don''t want to..."


    "No no! I do! I mean, I might not...it''s practically involuntary..."


    "Some groping is acceptable under the circumstances." Goldie''s expression softened. "Look, it''s been a rough day. We almost died. I''m all keyed up, and I just...think I''ll feel better if I make out with my boyfriend."


    "So..."


    "Don''t make a big thing about it. Come over here, I just know I, going to have to teach you how to do this. With my luck you''ve only ever practiced on a power pole."


    "Hey, doesn''t even get close to the charge I get from you baby."


    "This will be better if you don''t talk."


    Elsewhere, Ammeline was having a much less romantic conversation. She''d found a little dell to sit in, where she was talking to the nature spirits.


    "Thanks!"


    "Thank you!"


    "We''re really grateful to you for fighting the big elf lady."


    "Well you''re welcome I''m sure," Ammeline said. "Will you be alright? We destroyed a lot of the forest."


    "No worries!"


    "It happens!"


    "Destruction is part of the natural cycle of the forest. More importantly, you have the gratitude of the forest spirits!"


    "Oh well," Ammeline threw her head back and laughed. "Ahahahahahahaha! It was nothing, really! Helping you happened to align with my own goals, you understand.


    "Still!"


    "We owe you!"


    "We have decided to give you a gift."


    "Ah! Uhm...thank you! I suppose it would be rude not to accept...what is it?"


    "Secret!"


    "You''ll see!"


    "When you least expect it..."


    Giggling, the three nature spirits faded away into sparkling green essence that hinted at the shape of leaves.


    "Well that was ominous," Ammeline said worriedly.

 Chapter 62: Ducknoument Part 2

    Tanya and her grandfather stood together, staring down a wounded Sylvanandra.


    "You can both relax," the elf sorceress said. "I lost, fair and square."


    "You wouldn''t care about that if you weren''t bound by an oath," Tanya said.


    "True. But I am, so you win. I''ve got to go back to Europe and tell Taliesin Cromlaire what happened here. You know we''ll be back eventually, right? Especially if you''re bullshitting about the ring..."


    "We''ll be much better prepared next time and you know it. Attacking us again would be impractical. Besides, I''m not lying about the ring." Dr. Myrden adjusted his sleeves. "I''m a quack, not a liar."


    "No, but there''s something you''re not telling us." Sylvanandra turned away and walked into the forest. "But fine, fine, you win for today. Go ahead and have you victory party. It feels like half of you have already started."


    "What do you mean?" Tanya blinked.


    "I MEAN YOUR FRIENDS ARE BANGING!" The elf sorceress turned back and shouted. "AND I CAN SENSE IT BECAUSE SHADOW MAGIC! YOU KNOW, ALL THE BANGING!"


    "Alright yes fine," Tyra groaned, hanging her head in her hands. "You''ve made your point, please just go away now."


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    "YOU WANT ME TO STOP TALKING ABOUT THE BANGING? BECAUSE THEY''RE BANGING!"


    "Stop," Dr. Myrden said. Sylvanandra laughed and walked off into the forest, disappearing into the shadows. When she was gone, he turned back to his daughter.


    "You were really impressive tonight," he told her.


    "I was barely scraping through." Tanya was glad her father had decided to just ignore the comments about bang--dammit, now that deranged elf had HER doing it! "I only came out here in the first place because..."h


    "Because I''ve been ignoring you."


    "I wasn''t going to say that."


    "No but it''s true. I''ve been ignoring you. You were always so independent, I forgot you needed help too. So forgive me, and I''ll try to do better."


    He put his arm around her, and she leaned into him.


    "Thanks dad."


    There was a moment of silence.


    "For a second I thought you were going to say something about..."


    "I wouldn''t, let the touching moment happen."


    Kyle and Jenny sat together, looking up at the stars.


    "So that was a weird day," Jenny said.


    "Not really lately," Kyle laughed.


    "Yeah. Sorry."


    "No don''t be," Kyle said. "There''s been more than enough good stuff to balance out all the life threatening peril. And it''s not like the wish made Sylvanandra and this group she belongs to exist, right?"


    "No, it doesn''t work like that. Wishes manipulate existing reality, they can''t create people or places that didn''t exist before. The wish probably gave you all that magic though, and everyone else. Well, most of them."


    "There you go then," Kyle shrugged. "Something like this would be happening anyway. Someone would have to deal with it. I do wonder though, about the other two people."


    "Ohh, the other two wishes!" Jenny said. "Yeah I have no idea. No way to tell unless something really obvious happens."


    "Yeah. See? There''s a lot of this we can''t know. And there''s a lot we can''t control. But in the forest before, I decided to try and control what I can. I think I need to get stronger, Jenny. A lot stronger."


    "You''re pretty strong already. You beat the elf."


    "I''m not that strong. We got lucky. She was playing around, Dr. Myrden tricked her into that oath, a few lucky hits...if she''d come at us seriously from the start, it would have all been over. I want...I want peace, and happiness, that''s all I want really. But if I''m going to keep it I need to be at least as strong as Sylvanandra. And it sounds like her boss is even stronger."


    Jenny slid close to him, hugging his arm.


    "Okay. I''ll help."


    The two of them sat together for a long while, staring up into the stars.

 Chapter 65: New Day, New Dawn, New School

    Dawn rose over the town of Two Rivers on what was to become the first day of college for our intrepid band of heroes. Everyone was handling it differently. Kyle, fir example, was wishing he could go deaf.


    He thought he probably still could, if he tried. Maybe find a dragon to roar directly in his ear, that was a thing. There had to be dragons around here someplace. Possibly, just possibly, Dr. Myrden had a duck who could quack loudly enough to bring the blessed silence. If he had normal human ears, undoubtedly he''d be deaf already.


    Finally he had no choice. He didn''t want to be controlling, or condescending, or anything like that, but he had to reach out and put his hand over Jenny''s mouth. He felt bad about it, but the end of the squealing was so blissful he couldn''t bring himself to care.


    "Jenny," he said. "I get that you''re excited, and I''m glad, but you really need to chill out."


    "Hmmhmm!" He took his hand off her mouth. "Okay! But I''m just super excited! It turns out there''s a whole new KIND of school! I''m actually kind of familiar with this kind though, we had universities and academies even way back in ancient Uzbedi. Though I bet it''s different! New friends, new people! I mean our friends are great, but new people are good too! And it''s nice to have school to focus on instead of just training."


    "I get it, but we need to go or were gonna be late."


    "No being late!" Jenny insisted, one fist raised high I''m the air. "Let''s go!"


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    Elsewhere, Trevor and Betty met on the road. Betty took his arm, hugging it between her breasts, though her expression barely changed. Trevor pointedly pretended not to notice what she was doing with his arm.


    "Hello," she said flatly.


    "Hey beautiful," Trevor smiled. "Sleep well?"


    "Well enough. I do prefer sleeping with you beside me, but I understand It''s not practical most nights."


    "I mean we do both still live with our parents."


    "True. Stolen moments of lust overcoming us are the most we can manage for now. On that topic, I have had an idea."


    "Oh no."


    "I believe with our joint physical abilities we could manage it."


    "Woman I am not a machine!" Trevor said desperately.


    "You are magically possessed of literally infinite stamina."


    "I''m not. I''m really not. You''re going to wear a hole in me! Break something!"


    "You expressed extreme enjoyment in my last eighteen suggested sexual positions and activities. We''re you lying?"


    "No, I wasn''t..."


    "Then you have grown tired of me. Frequent access to my body has made me boring."


    "NO! No, Betty, that''s not it. That''s never it. I am not tired of you, or your body, or anything about you, you''re amazing. But I have limits! And I don''t have a lust demon giving me a billion years of experience either."


    "Theoretical experience. I am finally able to practice. And all of these ideas were my own. But I suppose of you''re having trouble keeping up..."


    "Thank you," Trevor sighed.


    "....I could begin research into magical aphrodisiacs and energy drinks."


    "You are so lucky I''m in love with you."


    Evan lay on his couch staring up at the ceiling, thinking about life. His life in particular. Nothing had gone the way he''d thought. He''d had a pretty good idea of how his life was going to go, before. Then magic had gotten involved, and a whole new world had opened up in front of him. Almost immediately he''d started making plans.


    And then even those plans....


    His phone rang and he picked up the phone. Goldie was texting him, telling him to hurry up. First day of school, and all. Goldie definitely hadn''t been a part of his plan. Honestly he''d figured any woman he ended up with would be with him for the money. Having someone like her actually care about him was...strange.


    But not bad strange. And neither is a change of plans, necessarily. He smiled as he sat up, thinking of something he could say to annoy her.

 Chapter 66: Never Know Who Youll Meet

    The university building wasn''t far from the highschool. It was where a lot of people who went to highschool in two rivers ended up going, unless they achieved escape velocity and left town. Since all three of the highschools tend to feed into it, not to mention out of state students, it''s a lot bigger than any of the highschools, a red brick building at the center of a complex of smaller buildings dominating grounds of rolling green, though with summer threatening to turn into autumn the grin is starting to get tinged with brown. And the rolling green grounds are almost impossible to see, clogged as they are with so many new students.


    "This is a lot of people," Kyle said, looking over the crowd. Thanks to the benefits of a magically enhanced body, he was one of the tallest people there.


    "Just like the royal bazaar back home!" Jenny said delightedly. "Come on, the trick to moving in a crowd like this is to use your elbows and abandon the concept of empathy. Oh look, it''s Ammeline!"


    "Really? I could have sworn she was going out of state!"


    They caught up to Ammeline in the crowd.


    "Ahahahahahahaha! I know what you''re wondering. Yes, my parents wanted me to go to a more prestigious institution. It was out of the question, of course, for me to leave town with everything going on. But I did have to promise perfect grades, along with...other concessions."


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    "Aren''t you legally an adult? Can your parents still control that?"


    Ammeline gave Jenny a long, complicated look.


    "It''s not that simple. Sometimes I forget you''re from a million years ago."


    "A million years ago in Uzbedi you were technically your family''s property until you turned forty. I''m going by what I read to catch up here. Also I don''t think it was actually that long. Right? It can''t be."


    "Nobody''s told me to completely abandon the fossil record or the theory of evolution since I became part of all this magic insanity so probably not," Kyle said. "Assuming time only goes in one direction."


    "Oh let''s not get into time travel," Ammeline rubbed her temples. "This horrible crowd is giving me a headache as it is."


    "Actually I think that''s magic sense," Kyle said. "I''m not good at it yet, but I think I''ve been sensing a lot of magic power ever since we got here."


    "No you''re right," Jenny said. "Me too. Some of the people here are strong. Like...him."


    Kyle was one of the tallest people here, but not THE tallest. The tallest person here was a long, lanky man with tanned skin and piercing yellow eyes. He radiated magic like a beacon.


    "Her too," Ammeline said. "If we''re going by my headache."


    An Asian woman with hair so pale blonde it was almost white walked through the crowd. There was something off about her movements, they were graceful but somehow robotic. Emotionless.


    "And that teacher," Kyle said. "Since we''re all picking someone."


    He gestured to an older woman, short and thick set without being fat. She was answering questions to a group of confused new students.


    "This doesn''t have to be anything sinister," Jenny pointed out. "This is a big group of people from all over. It makes sense a few of them have got magical power, even if it''s a lot rarer now right?"


    "Yeah! Besides, it''s the ones who are HIDING their power you really gotta watch out for."


    The voice was familiar, but it still took Kyle a moment to place it. He whirled around, fist raised, ready to fight.


    "Heya!" Sylvanandra said, winking and waving at them.

 Chapter 67: No Rest For the Weary

    Kyle''s magic flared, but the elven sorceress held out a hand.


    "Whoa there big boy, keep it in your pants. I''m not here to start a fight. Just look at me."


    She DID look different. Her pointed ears were gone, disguised as round human ones. She hardly looked threatening in a baggy sweatshirt and sweatpants. She was also shorter, and looked...younger. About the right age to be an incoming freshman, come to think of it.


    "You''re here as a student," Kyle says, relaxing his power a little.


    "I mean obviously I''m here incognito," Sylvanandra rolled her eyes. "Catch the fuck up."


    "Does incognito normally mean walking up and announcing yourself to people you''ve tried to murder?" Ammeline asked, her voice filled with acid.


    "I''m not hiding from YOU. I''m hiding from the Uzbedis. You didn''t think me making a deal with you meant the boss was going to just forget about you right? I''m here to keep an eye on you. Not to do any fighting. I barely could if I wanted to."


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    "I think she''s right," Jenny said. She was the best at sensing magic out of all of them. "I''m pretty sure her power is severely damaged. That can happen when you push your magical control beyond it''s limits."


    "Like how?" Kyle asked.


    "Like casting multiple copies, all of which got destroyed, then conjured a massive plant golem you got punched out of without properly disengaging and then punched so hard in the face you passed out," Sylvanandra sighed, waving her hand in the air. "You know, hypothetically, just a random example not connected to anything that''s been been happening recently."


    "So they sent you here as a spy," Kyle said.


    "Yep!" Sylvanandra said. "I''m here to join your friend group! Well be hanging out all the time now, besties!"


    Kyle considered a lot of responses to that, ranging from laughing in her face to directly applied violence. The problem was he couldn''t think of any response to that sentence which wouldn''t turn into a downward spiral of cliches. Short of the violence, he was really leaning towards the violence.


    "Kidding!" Sylvanandra laughed, holding up her hands. "Kidding, kidding. I''ll just be constantly present in the school watching your every move with unseen tendrils of mystical shadow. Please do worry about it."


    She turned and walked off into the crowd.


    "Well that''s certainly something we''ll have to deal with later," Ammeline said. "How many other people here do you think are plotting to kill us?"


    Kyle and Jenny just shrugged. They had no way of knowing.


    But for the record, it was seven.

 Chapter 68: Girlfriend powers, no genie required

    After that, they were required to go to an orientation assembly. It was fairly basic stuff. They sat in a huge lecture hall, sitting behind packets that contained all the information they were listening to, and which was itself in the emails they''d all gotten the day before. Admittedly, Kyle hadn''t read the packet or the email. He tried to pay attention, he really did, but sylvanandra was in the same orientation lecture. She kept making faces appear in the shadows around him and make lewd faces.


    "Sorry I''m late!" Tanya hissed, slipping into the chair behind him. "My house is a mess, something''s going on with the Uzbedis...is that Sylvanandra!?"


    "I''ll explain later," Kyle said. They were already getting dirty looks from the professor giving an orientation lecture. So they quieted down until the lecture was over. Once they''d gotten everyone together from their various lectures, Kyle explained what had happened so far to everyone."


    "So we''ve identified four people with high levels of magical power, one of whom is a known enemy who has already tried to kill us."


    "That about covers it," Kyle sighed.


    "And we have been college students for how long exactly?" Trevor sighed.


    "Less than two hours," Tanya rubbed her temples.


    "Hey don''t blame Kyle for this!" Jenny said defensively. "Yes, most of them are probably here because of his connection to the last genie. And yes, this is all happening because he made the wish. And yes, he....I lost my train of thought."


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    Kyle flicked her in the ear.


    "No one is blaming Kyle!" Ammeline said haughtily. "That''s not what this is about. I think most of us are highly satisfied with the sudden intrusion of magic into our lives."


    "I''m even getting better with it," Goldie said, conjuring a little light in the palm of her hand.


    "Yeah it was "fuck my life" not "fuck you"," Evan said. "So do we, I dunno, go talk to these people? If they''re not hiding their magic maybe they want to talk."


    "Or they want to be left alone," Tanya suggested. "Or they know nothing about magic and just happen to have active nodes Evan stop talking."


    "I hadn''t even said anything!" Evan protested. "I mean, I was going to. But at least let me make the horrible joke before you yell."


    "So what do we do next?" Jenny asked.


    "Nothing," Kyle shrugged. "We''ll deal with them when we have to."


    "I meant for school."


    "Still nothing." Betty adjusted her glasses. "Today was just orientation. We now go about our day and attend classes on Monday."


    "Awww," Jenny wilted. "I was having fun..."


    "There''s a party later," Evan said. "An official one put on by the school. It''s a get loose and get to know everybody thing."


    "I dunno," Kyle said. "I''m not much for parties. I was thinking just..."


    Everyone was looking at him strangely. Well, almost everyone. He couldn''t see Jenny, she was standing to the side of him. Trevor shrugged helplessly and pointed. Kyle turned.


    She was using magic right? She had to be. It had to be a spell making her eyes so big and sparkly.


    "I mean, I''m just not a big partier is all..."


    Sparkle, sparkle.


    "We talked about this, right? I don''t control your life, just because I don''t wanna go doesn''t mean...."


    Sparkle, sparkle.


    "...I mean you can go on your own, or with some of the others..."


    Sparkle, sparkle.


    ".........hey Jenny, wanna go to the party tonight?"


    "YAY!" She tackled him into a crushing hug.

 Chapter 69: Pay Attention!

    The party was...


    Well, it was. A bunch of people crammed into a big empty arena somewhere on the college campus. The lights were dim, and people were painting each other with glow in the dark paint. There were refreshments.


    The others had scattered all over. He could actually see Goldie and Evan dancing over in the corner. They were surprisingly good at it. Had he always been a good dancer, or was this magical enhancement? Maybe it was training. Two out of three of those possibilities would mean Kyle was now probably a decent dancer too, but whatever. That didn''t make him suddenly magically like it.


    He pulled his shirt away from where it had caught on the table. That kept happening tonight.


    Kyle wasn''t much for parties, like he''d said. He''d had a decent time at the dance, but this was a party, not a dance. A lot roudyer, a lot less organized, even if this WAS a school event. Then again, he''d had a good time at the dance because of the company.


    Jenny was a sensation. While he stood by the refreshment table adjusting his shirt, Jenny had fallen into one of her ancient Uzbedi dances on the floor, and a circle had formed around her. He couldn''t blame them, he was mesmerized by her too. She was in her human disguise, of course, but he found he almost didn''t notice. Human or genie, brown skin or pinkish purple, it was just like Jenny was putting on a different shirt.


    That thought seemed to summon the curses of his own shirt. It had caught on the table again. It had been doing that all night. It was driving him crazy.


    "Hey!" A girl he''d never seen before said. "Not dancing?"


    "Uhhh..." Kyle blinked. Girls he''d never seen before did NOT walk up to him and talk. Or at least they hadn''t before.


    But he was almost a foot taller now, and covered in muscles. At the highschool where everyone knew him before, that hadn''t mattered much. Everyone knew him. Here, nobody knew him. This girl had no preconceptions.


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    That was...a weird thought to have.


    "I''m not much of a dancer," he said finally.


    "Really? Because you look like you have ALL the right moves."


    Ouch. Okay. Playing dumb was not going to help in this situation. This was...SO much more forward than anyone he''d ever spoken to before.


    "Listen if I''m reading this wrong I''m sorry," he said, pulling his shirt out of the table again. "But I''m here with my girlfriend."


    He gestured to Jenny dancing on the floor.


    "So why aren''t you dancing with her?"


    "Because I''m not much of a dancer and I really don''t know traditional Uzbedi dances."


    "What''s Uzbedi?"


    "A country somewhere between Europe and Asia. Don''t feel bad I''d never heard of it before I met her either."


    "Huh. Well she''s pretty cute. Real cute actually. You know what? Bring her along."


    Kyle almost choked on his own tongue.


    "That''s a very tempting offer," he managed in a gasping wheeze. And one Jenny might even approve of, with her open bisexuality and talk of multiple wives. Though he doubted she''d want some random girl they just met, if they brought someone in she''d probably want someone they knew. Like Ammeline, Jenny already said she wouldn''t mind having sex with Ammeline...


    Kyle gave himself a mental slap in the face. This train of thought was counterproductive.


    "That''s a very tempting offer," he managed in a more normal voice. "But I don''t think she''d be up for it. And I definitely wouldn''t do it without her."


    "You sure?" The woman pressed.


    "Look at that. Would you risk that if you had it?"


    He looked over at Jenny, undulating on the dance floor. The girl followed his gaze.


    "Guess not. But listen, I''m writing my number on this napkin. Talk to your girl and get I''m touch sometime, huh?"


    She tucked the napkin in his hand and walked off. He took a moment to look at it.


    It read "Conni Fairbanks, Hot, Up For A Threesome" over a phone number. He stated at it for a moment, then tucked it in his pocket. He felt a little guilty about that. It was funny, that''s all. He and Jenny would haugh about it later. That''s right, laugh. Hah hah. That was the only reason he''d kept it.


    It was certainly funnier than this shirt getting caught every damn....wait.


    He''d stepped away from the table.


    His shirt couldn''t be getting caught on the table anymore.


    He looked down at his arm, and the shirt. It was caught alright. It looked like someone was grabbing it.


    No, wait, someone really WAS grabbing it. There were fingers clutching the fabric. His eyes just didn''t want to notice them. Even now that he had, they kept wanting to slide away. He followed the fingers up to an arm, and finally noticed the person standing next to him. How long had she been there!?


    She was cute, in a weirdly nondescript way. Mousey build, grayish pale hair. Kind of like if Betty''s voice turned into a person. She was also shouting, but he couldn''t make out the words. Like she was on mute. But as he focused, he began to hear a buzzing that got louder...and louder...until finally...


    "....ou! Come on you have to hear me! You''re looking right at me, can you see me? You can see me right? God I hope you can see me...I''m trying to warn you someone''s planning to kill you!"

 Chapter 70: Valerie

    This is the story of a girl named Valerie Nemo.


    Kyle and his small group of friends were isolated at the beginning of the story because everyone knew them as the nerd group. It was, in a way, isolation through notoriety. They had a reputation they hadn''t been able to shake. Valerie had spent her entire life isolated because nobody noticed her at all.


    She was naturally quiet, and her natural coloration was muted. She didn''t like to wear loud colors. And she was the kind of person happy to sit for hours reading, happier doing that than sitting at a table chatting with a bunch of people. So she''d sat, and read, and after a while she''d just...faded away. Present, but completely unremarked.


    It hadn''t been terrible, exactly, but somewhere along the line it occurred to her she might have missed something. She started wanting friends. Unfortunately, she had no idea how to get them. And when she decided to try and get noticed, the first person to notice her was Danny O''Brien. Not the greatest introduction to socializing.


    But then the second person to notice her had cared enough to throw an apple, and draw Danny''s attention. You know, all the way back at the beginning of chapter one.


    After that, Valerie was impressed and a little starstruck. She''d started paying attention to Kyle Anderman. And what she saw, from her perspective, looked like a superhero. She was aware she had a crush on him, and also aware he had a girlfriend. That was okay, she wasn''t lost in romantic fantasies. She just wanted someone to talk to. And she had the perfect in. All she had to do was thank him! A built in conversation starter!


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    But she couldn''t find a time that felt good to actually do it. Until one night she was staying late at school to work on a project for class, and found out he was staying late too to work on a chemistry project. Perfect opportunity right? But by the time he''d gone to meet him, something outside had exploded, and he was running down the hall. No one noticed her running behind them, and when she saw the freaky monster she actually hit.


    The backlash from Kyle''s blast against the efreet had knocked her unconscious, where she had stayed until the following morning. She stumbled home, deciding to take a day off from school to process things. She was surprised her mother didn''t say anything about it, but it wasn''t until dinner that night, when she couldn''t get anyone to look at her, that she realized something was very, very wrong.


    Like the others present, Kyle''s uncontrolled magical explosion had opened up her dormant nodes. Her one titanic node. But in her case, she had inadvertently spent a lifetime honing her aura to one purpose, one result. She had been training herself to have one power all her life. It was in many ways the central fact about her.


    Nobody noticed Valerie Nemo.


    And so, quietly, she''d vanished from the world. Not completely. Her papers and tests were graded, though professors couldn''t ever remember seeing her in class. They didn''t think much of it, she''d been a vague blur in their consciousness from the beginning. And every once in a while the spell would break for her parents, when they began to worry about where she was, but only for the few moments it took them to realize their daughter was alive, and then she would fade from their consciousness again.


    For a lot of people it would have been hell...but Valerie had been living pretty much like this already. So she adapted. Use self checkout, the cashiers couldn''t perceive her. Do her own laundry. Habit made her parents buy and cook enough food, so she wasn''t going hungry.


    And when she had the time, she followed Kyle Anderman, and learned all kinds of amazing things. Not completely. In bits and pieces, scraps of information. About a secret world of magic, and genies, and some kind of government conspiracy. It was all very fascinating...but she couldn''t get any details, because she couldn''t talk to anyone.


    And then she had overhead two people talking about killing Kyle Anderman. The person she thought of as her one link to the world. She couldn''t let that happen. So she''d found him, and tried to talk to him again. For over an hour she screamed in his face and tugged at his clothes.


    Until finally, she broke through.

 Chapter 71: Breaking through

    Kyle rubbed his temples, desperately trying to process all this information. Both the threat against his life, and the abridged version of her story she''d given him. Actually, not so very abridged. She was talking incredibly fast, stumbling over her words, and it occurred to Kyle that if her story was true, she hadn''t been able to talk to anyone in months. Not and have them listen to her, anyway.


    "Okay," he said, holding up his hands. "I believe you. But let''s go through this a piece at a time. WHO did you hear say they were trying to kill me?"


    "An Asian girl with really pale blonde hair," Valerie said. "She was talking to a guy in a long red robe with a hood. Not like bright red, kinda muddy red. The smoke was bright red. Oh, I didn''t tell you about the smoke. When he was done talking to her he kind of disappeared into it. Fell into it, really. Almost like a hole opened right underneath his feet and he just dropped down. He..."


    "That was fun!" Jenny said, walking up to Kyle, breathless and a little sweaty from her dancing. It was so nice to just cut loose for a while."


    "Jenny," Kyle said a little reproachfully. That was uncharacteristically rude  for her.


    "What? I kept my top on! You made me promise to only do that dance without my top on on private!"


    "It''s okay," Valerie sighed. "She doesn''t even know I''m here."


    "Oh right. I forgot about that."


    "If you''re forgetting about my topless dancing I need to work harder," Jenny smirked, pressing against his side. "Tell you what, maybe we could slip out and I can give you a private show to remind you? And after I''ll do the thing where I..."


    "Talk about this in private!" Kyle said hurriedly.


    "Relax nobody can hear us." She gestured to show how nobody was paying attention. Unfortunately this meant almost hitting Valerie in the face, who just kind of ducked back and shrugged. "But it''s cute when you''re shy."


    Jenny kissed him on the cheek.


    "Actually I was kind of interested what she was going to say," Valerie blushed.


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    "You aren''t helping," Kyle groaned.


    "What?" Jenny blinked. "What''s going on with you? You''re acting weird."


    Kyle turned to Valerie.


    "What happens if I make eye contact with you and talk to you directly while she can hear?"


    "She who? Kyle, what''s going on? You''re acting like..."


    Jenny''s eyes lost focus for a moment.


    "Whatever, it''s not important. How about that private dance?"


    "Like that," Valerie shrugged. "I''m not just invisible. Whatever this is makes people forget about me of the start to suspect someone might be there. It''s pretty thorough."


    "But I don''t feel anything like that anymore. Meaning once you break through it, it''s broken."


    "Nooo don''t say that!" Jenny pouted. "We''ve known each other less than a year, you can''t be losing interest in me already!"


    Kyle grabbed the sides of Jenny''s face.


    "Oh good this is more like it."


    "Jenny," Kyle said, turning her to look at Valerie. "I need you to listen to me very carefully, and believe what I say. There is a girl standing right there."


    "A.. what? A girl?"


    "Yes, a girl. Standing right in front of you. Believe it. Focus on it. Valerie, you focus on Jenny, like you focused on me."


    "I mean I''ll try," Valerie said. "But I''m still surprised I got through to you. Uhm, hi Jenny, I''m Valerie, I''ve been following you guys around for a while."


    "Huh? Wait, I almost heard...I think I CAN see something. Like a shadow or an outline...."


    Jenny''s eyes lost focus for a moment again.


    "It''s no good Kyle, I''m never any good at optical illusions. Maybe it''s genie eyes, they could work a little different from humans? Let''s go sit down somewhere..."


    "See? As soon as she starts to notice it makes her forget." Valerie slumped. "I bet even you''ll forget, eventually. You''d better write down what I said about someone trying to kill you. But don''t write down that I exist, you might forget about the note."


    "To hell with that!" Kyle snarled. Jenny said something, but he held onto her head and grabbed hold of their connection. He forced the thought down it, and even as he did he could feel it slipping away. Felt whatever magic kept Valerie hidden try to keep the thought from taking hold. But he poured all his power into it. To his surprise it took ALL his power. It was like fighting Sylvanandra again. Worse. He''d never felt pressure like this before. Sweat beaded on his forehead. He could barely breathe.


    And then the pressure broke, and he felt the thought ram itself into Jenny''s mind. She blinked and stumbled back, then looked straight at Valerie.


    "Huh? Wait...are you...have you been there the whole time!?"


    "Oh my god you can see me! TWO PEOPLE can see me!"


    "Who are you? No, wait! Kyle called you Valerie! I''m remembering...I''m remembering the whole conversation now. You were right there and I just ignored you! I''m sorry that was super rude!"


    "I think I''m cursed, don''t worry about it."


    "Oh wow. That''s incredibly powerful magic! It must have been so tough for you."


    "I was living with it....but listen! Somebody''s trying to kill Kyle!"


    "Oh!" Jenny raised a hand with pinkish magic sparkling around it. "Well let''s go deal with that! And then we''ll figure out how to introduce you to your other friends."

 Chapter 72: Assassination and Other Careers

    "It''s one of the people we noticed earlier," Kyle said as they moved through the crowd. "The Asian girl with the blonde hair. Who do you think she works for?"


    "Hmmm that''s tough," Jenny bit her lip. "I mean the obvious answer is Taliesin Cromlaire and his organization, but they already sent someone here. So it could be someone else who found out about the lamp. You''ve kind of got a huge target on your back now!"


    "Wait didn''t you have like huge psychological problems about that?" Valerie asked, hurrying to keep up with them.


    "Oh yeah but now that our souls are directly connected I can literally feel how much he loves me. Wait, how did you know about that?"


    "Oh I''ve kind of been...around," Valerie said. "A lot. I couldn''t get into Tanya Myrden''s house, and I couldn''t follow you when you flew off on that big duck, but anytime you were at school I was probably following you and listening. Uhm...now that I say that out loud that''s pretty creepy actually."


    "Nah it''s okay. You were going through a lot of problems." Kyle smiled at her. "I can''t imagine what it was like, and we were your only lifeline. Wait, did you ever come in my house?"


    "O-only once!" Valerie blushed bright red. "I left a-as soon as you guys started..."


    "Ohhhh hey Kyle! Remember the night "the wind" blew the door open? I bet that was her! Hey it''s kinda neat, we can go back through our lives and try to figure out what stuff that happened was actually you. It''s like a puzzle!"


    "That''s going to be pretty hard though, considering we were actually attempting to ignore she was there. Even our own internal monologues might not be trustworthy. I see Tanya."


    Tanya was at the drinks table with a cup in each hand. Non alcoholic Kyle noticed. He got the feeling she wasn''t a big drinker. She raised a cup at them as they caught up with her.


    "Having fun?" She asked, smiling. "I''m finally at a party I wasn''t on the planning committee of!"


    "That''s great!" Jenny said. "Somebody''s trying to kill Kyle."


    "Right. Of course." Tanya rubbed her temples. "You said both of those sentences just as perkily as each other. Is it Sylvanandra again? No that''s ridiculous, she literally can''t by magical contract. And even if she did any one of us except Goldie could take her the way she is now."


    "It''s an Asian girl with pale blonde hair. We noticed her earlier at orientation as one of the high magic people."


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    "Oh and this is our new friend Valerie!" Jenny gestured to the mousy looking girl like she was on a game show showing off a brand new car. Valerie waved weakly, but her face looked kind of bored and depressed. Tanya just blinked in Valerie''s general direction.


    "What? Jenny what are you talking about?"


    "Her!" Jenny pointed. "Right there! Valerie! She''s like double triple ultra mega super invisible."


    "Right. Jenny, stop fooling around. I''d think you''d be a little more serious with Kyle''s life on the line."


    "But she really is there!" Jenny wilted.


    "It''s okay," Valerie said. "She''s right, we have bigger problems. And you had to use your power of true love soul link to see me anyway."


    "I promise we''ll find a way to fix this," Kyle put a hand on her shoulder.


    "What did you say?" Tanya asked, her eyes unfocused.


    "I was talking to Valerie," Kyle said. "I think I already have a way to help prove she exists, but it''ll take time. Right now what about the others?"


    "No idea where they are," Tanya said. "It''s really crowded. Evan and Goldie are probably off someplace, and Betty and Trevor...well. Betty and Trevor. We can try calling but I bet they''re busy."


    "Or Trevor is dead from dehydration," Kyle said flatly. "Alright, that leaves Ammeline..."


    "LOOK OUT!" Valerie shrieked, and Kyle just had time to pull on his magical defenses before something slammed into his back. It was like getting poked really hard by an oncoming train. With a finger at the front of it. No, it wasn''t a very sensible image but the attack had come out of nowhere, and Kyle was painfully aware whatever he''d been hit with was sharp. If he hadn''t brought up his defenses it would have gone right through his kidney.


    Which, magically enhanced endurance or not, was game over for a human body. It was how they taught special forces to kill enemy sentries. That had been CLOSE. The closest he''d gotten to dead since Danny O''Brien cooked him extra crispy.


    He whirled around to see the Asian girl standing behind him with her arms crossed. She was standing right next to Valerie, but if course took no notice. He couldn''t see any sign of whatever weapon she''d just used to attack him. Maybe it had been some kind of spell?


    "Frustrating," she said, her voice oddly flat. It reminded him a little of Betty''s voice, but...not. Betty spoke in a monotone, but this woman spoke without any emotions at all. It was a subtle difference, but a frightening one.


    Or maybe it was just frightening because she was an enemy who had almost successfully murdered him. That was pretty frightening all on its own.


    "How did you sense my presence?" She asked.


    "My invisible friend saw you and told me."


    "Yes, that''s fair. I wouldn''t reveal my secrets to an enemy either. But I still need to kill you."


    "Do you work for Taliesin Cromlaire?" Tanya asked.


    "No. The opposite, I oppose him completely. Taliesin Cromlaire must not be allowed to obtain the last genie. So I will kill you, retrieve the lamp, and take it to a secure location to prevent this."


    "Well now we know the motive, but it makes me kinda sad," Jenny sighed.


    "But killing you is a lot more difficult now," the attacker mused. "You will certainly take defensive measures, so my assassination techniques won''t work again. Well, I''m not really an assassin anyway."


    "You just tried to assassinate me," Kyle pointed out. "That makes you an assassin by the actual literal dictionary definition."


    "I am not primarily an assassin. I learned assassin skills because they are useful. But I am a much better warrior. However I didn''t bring my sword, because this is a crowded area and I was ordered to limit collateral damage. Oh, I know now. If I''m going to kill you, I''ll need your cooperation."


    "Yes well you''re not going to get it..."


    "I challenge you to a fight to the death. Agree or I will attempt to kill all of your friends. I am certain my assassination techniques will be effective against at least one of them."


    "It''s really creepy to hear you say that so casually," Tanya said. "Kyle, you don''t have to do this. We can protect everybody..."


    "No wait this is good," Kyle held up a hand. "A duel. Killing is allowed, but it doesn''t have to be to the death."


    "I will still kill you if I win."


    "Understood, but I have conditions too. If I win, you stop trying to kill is and tell us who sent you."


    "What if nobody sent her?" Valerie asked.


    "She talked about getting orders earlier, somebody sent her. How about it? One shot to take me out or fail your mission. I''m sure Tanya knows how to set up a binding magical contract."


    She took a moment to chew the thought over.


    "Acceptable. My name is Hanna Omaya, and I agree to be bound by the terms you have set. Now let''s go someplace I can kill you without too mich collateral damage."

 Status Report-the author is still alive

    Tldr: there WILL be a new chapter this week.


    Not that the long version is very long, the building I was living in was damaged, the owners ultimately deciding to shut the place down completely. So with all of THAT chaos I didn''t have the chance to post a chapter, and now that things are a bit more settled I''ve decided to post the next chapter at the regular time on what is for me late Friday night. Thank you all for sticking with me, I''ve got some fun stuff planned for this storyline coming up!


    Royal Road is the home of this novel. Visit there to read the original and support the author.


    Honestly, thanks to EVERYONE who''s been reading along. I started this story when my life was a LOT more stable than it''s become over the past year and a half or so, having people read and even give their own thoughts even through all the problems going on "backstage" has been huge. Thanks again, hope everybody is doing okay and I''ll be back with more of the adventure this weekend!

 Chapter 73: Duel

    They settled on a parking lot. Isn''t that always the way? Parking lot to a strip mall late at night. Big, open, nobody around. Ryu and Ken would be proud. Well, probably prouder if we took the time to beat up a car for absolutely no reason.


    Kyle wondered if he was blithering like that in my own head to take my mind off the fight. This woman was a lot more dangerous than anyone he''d ever fought before. And for all his bravado, he was fairly terrified. He had no idea what kind of moves she''d bring out against him. No idea what she could do to him. Hell, he wasn''t even sure what she''d done to him already. He still could figure out what she''s hit him with.


    The only thing he was sure of was that it hadn''t been the katana at her waist. There was no way she''d brought that huge thing into the dance. Tanya, Jenny, and Valerie stood on the sidelines, but if they interfered it would break the oath and ruin the whole plan. Of course dying would also ruin the whole plan, but he was left with limited options.


    They faced each other across the concrete.


    "So how does this work?" Kyle asked.


    "We fight each other until one of us is dead. Most likely you."


    "First of all, this doesn''t have to be to the death. I was very clear on that. Second, I meant how do we start. Never fought an organized duel before."


    "Oh. Normally, there us a signal to begin. Someone trows a rock in the air and we start fighting when it lands. Or when somebody shouts "Begin!" Sometimes there''s a countdown but...


    "Begin!" Jenny blurted out. Kyle wasn''t sure what she was thinking, but he supposed he''d have to talk to her about it later, assuming he''d survived. Because he''d hesitated for a split second when she''d shouted, but his opponent hadn''t. Before he knew it there was a sword coming straight for his face.


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    He brought his arm up and deflected her strike, his arm slapping against the side of her blade. He''d gotten a lot of fight training in over the past few months, not all of it magical. It wasn''t like the problem of weapons versus bare hands hand never come up before, and plenty of martial arts skills were specifically designed to even the odds. Enhanced speed and strength just helped.


    To be fair, they helped a LOT. She was faster than he was, but not by much, and he was a lot stronger. He didn''t exactly dominate in the first few minutes of the fight, but he was definitely coming out ahead. Well, to a degree. He hadn''t hit her yet, but she hadn''t hit him either.


    Ultimately, that just made him more concerned. She had to have better tricks than this. After another inconclusive clash they slid apart, and she sheathed her sword. Then she reached up and undid her ponytail. Her hair turned out to be much longer than Kyle had at first assumed, hanging down all the way to ankles. It shimmered in the light, thought not the pale blond she''d had before. Almost silver, like...


    Kyle groaned. He had a good idea what her real powers were now.


    Her hair rise up like bladed tendrils, swinging through the like a dozen swords as she charged at him.


    "Your hair is blades!? Really!?"


    He just barely ducked out if the way of a dozen swinging blade, backing up across the parking lot. Now HE was the one clearly on the back foot, dodging and dancing as the swords darted around him, humming with energy. Her blades whirled at him from every direction, leaving nicks and cuts on his skin.


    "You can do it!" Jenny called out.


    Valerie just looked terrified, and Tanya looked tense. Those didn''t seem like much of a vote of confidence. No serious damage had been done yet, but it was only a matter of time. He was going to have to take a risk.


    He concentrated everything he had in the skin of his hands. Just the skin. He felt hot, and vaguely purple light shone around his hands. Then he grabbed her hair.


    He had split seconds. She could definitely do what he had done, focus power into her hair to reinforce it. Even now, he could feel it starting to cut through his protection. He had to do this fast. He pulled with all his strength, swinging her over his head to crash down through the roof of the car. Whoever picked that night to leave their car in the parking lot was going to have a bad morning. He felt her hair go limp in his hands, devoid of power, as she slumped in the wreckage of the car.


    Jenny and Valerie cheered. Tanya just sagged in relief. Kyle walked up to the car and waited a minute before slapping Hana awake. She opened her eyes, her hair jerked towards him, and them fell back.


    "Oh. I lost. I cannot force myself to attack you."


    "You were out for a full minute. That''s a ten count in anyone''s book."


    "Then my assassination mission has failed." She pulled herself out of the rubble. "Alright. Ushbak Mulgantor."


    "What?" Kyle blinked.


    "That''s who sent me to kill you. Archmage Ushbak Mulgantor, third minister of the high chamber of the grand and ancient kingdom of Uzbedi. You wanted his name, and now you have it."

 Chapter 74: The Woes of Agent Nunez

    "Fuck!" Agent Nunez said, punching the steering wheel. "Fuck! What the hell were they thinking?"


    "We don''t know the details yet, ma''am," the agent in the car next to her pointed out. "Maybe they git attacked again."


    "Oh I''m sure they got attacked again," the caramel skinned agent hissed. It was a very catlike gesture. A lot of what she did had a feeling twist to it, from her features to her mannerisms. It had caused more than one agent to wonder what, exactly, their boss actually was....


    "I''m sure they got attacked," Nunez said again, forcing herself to be calmer. "And now we''ve got to clean it up. And you know what? It''s crap. This should be easy. We should be able to just arrest them for assault. But we can''t, can we? No, because the Uzbedis wrote all the rules about magic. So now instead of just sending a team to arrest whatever maniac wizard did this, I''ve gotta drag myself out of bed and handle it. AND make sure nobody finds out about it."


    "With respect ma''am...you''re starting to sound like Taliesin Cromlaire."


    "Cromlaire and his goons are a bunch of lunatic terrorists," Nunez waved a hand dismissively. "But just because I''m dedicated to stopping the, doesn''t mean I can''t hate the Uzbedis too. Oh look, a demolished strip mall parking lot! Hooray!"


    The car pulled up and Nunez jumped out of the car. Around her, she ts poured out of the black vans they came in. Nunez walked up to Kyle and Jenny, green fire sparking out from behind her sunglasses.


    "What the hell is it now?" She demanded.


    "The Uzbedi government sent an assassin to kill me," Kyle said.


    Nunez stared at him.


    "No they didn''t," she said.


    "They really did!" Jenny said. "Also Kyle and I have a new friend that nobody can see!"


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    Nunez stared at them.


    "You know magically speaking I''m pretty powerful," Nunez sighed. "I bet I could dig a hole so deep nobody could find me in it. I bet it wouldn''t be that hard."


    "I''m afraid it''s true, agent Nunez," Tanya said. "She admitted as much when Kyle defeated her in a duel."


    "A duel?" Nunez said. "This was an official duel? You mean we can''t even arrest her?"


    "Uhm ma''am?" One of the agents called out. "What''s the word here?"


    Several agents had surrounded Hanna, guns raised. The Uzbedi assassin stood with a hand on her sword, her hair twitching like snakes.


    "Let her go boys!" Nunez threw her hands into the air. "Apparently she didn''t break any laws! Not ones we get to enforce anyway!"


    The agents stepped back, and Hanna relaxed.


    "Thank you. I must correct one misconception. I was not sent by the Uzbedi government."


    "But you said..." Kyle started, but Hanna cut him off.


    "I was sent by Archmage Ushbak Mulgantor, third minister of the high chamber of the grand and ancient kingdom of Uzbedi. Not the government as a whole. This was the Archmage''s personal initiative."


    "Why should some random archmage want to kill me?" Kyle asked.


    "Several archmages want to kill you," Hanna said. "You are the main topic of discussion in the High Chamber of Uzbedi, Kyle Anderman. You are the master of the last genie. There are three factions debating what to do you with you. One faction believes you have followed the law, and should therefore be left alone. The other two believe you are too dangerous. One believes you should be recruited immediately. The third believes you should be killed, and the genie locked away in the vaults."


    "And Mulgantor wants Kyle dead, so he sent you," Tanya nodded thoughtfully.


    "Just you?" Nunez demanded. "How many Uzbedi agents are in this town right now?"


    "At least one from each faction," Hanna said. "If other assassins have been sent, I was not told about it."


    Kyle grabbed Jenny protectively around the waist, pulling her close to him.


    "I swear I won''t let them lock you away," Kyle promised.


    "Oh Kyle," Jenny sighed, melting into his arms.


    "Yes yes yes very romantic!" Nunez said. "But when we''re done being mushy what you''re really saying is that there''s an unknown number of foreign agents with competing agendas all operating in a civilian area with powerful and dangerous magic at their disposal and we don''t know who they are."


    "I mean it sounds bad when you put it like that," Jenny said. Nunez ignored her.


    "I''m assigning you an agent," Nunez said. "Somebody to keep an eye on you. The one thing we know is that you''re being targeted, Kyle."


    "How are you going to do that?" Kyle demanded. "Your guys in suits don''t blend in..... anywhere, really."


    "I have somebody who can. I was actually thinking about this already. Hey new kid! New kid get out here! Where...oh there you are. Everyone, I think you''re familiar with Benny Gold?"

 Chapter 75: The Doll

    A figure in a hooded cloak watched the duel from the roof of the strip mall.


    This wasn''t quite as stupid as that sentence just sounded. The cloak fluttered in the wind like fabric, but it''s surface was...not there. It seemed less like the cloak was invisible and more like the air had been folded around the hidden figure in the shape of a cloak. As if, except for when the wind caught the fabric just right the figure simply wasn''t there.


    When the shades showed up, it slipped away.


    And then..it dud not speak. It maid no noise at all. But it communicated, all the same, even as it slipped away into the dark of night.


    "Subject located. Already made contact with outside contractor. Combat abilities far higher than expected, subject still alive."


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    There was a response.


    "Understood. Move to secondary target?"


    Again, a response.


    The shadowy figure was moving swiftly across town now, leaping and darting between rooftops.


    "Understood. Returning."


    It danced over the rooftops until it reached a particular house, slipping in through the back door and standing still. The cloak fell off the figure, revealing a wooden doll. It had no face, no features, but something about the figure hinted it was feminine, though to say exactly what would have been difficult. Beneath the smooth wooden surface there were crystals, glowing faintly green, carved smooth interlocking circles that indicated the precision of machinery mixed with the magical.


    "Power down," its owner said, and it complied. It was a machine after all, built with specific functions. Told to follow, it followed. Told to shut down, it shut down. But it was also magical, something not quite as predictable as machinery.


    So though it shit down, it listened. Three voices, only one it was programmed to obey.


    "I didn''t think he could beat the Moonlight Blade."


    "Be a problem if we do end up having to kill him."


    "Do we have to? If he''s that powerful..."


    "It makes him more dangerous, not less."


    "Regardless, we''re operating blind. We need more information."


    "We need to get someone close to him."


    "Or CLOSE to someone close to him...now there''s a thought."


    "How good is the stealth protocol on this thing? I have an idea..."


    It was a machine. A thing of wood and glass and magic. It did not have emotions. But somewhere in it''s crystal heart,not felt the echoes of what might be called worry.

 Late chapter

    No chapter today for unavoidable reasons, sorry everyone, it''ll come in a day or two. I''m really looking forward still to where this new story is going, got fun new villains and allies to meet and we''ll be digging deeper into some of our old friends as well. Thanks for reading and thanks for being patient.


    This story has been taken without authorization. Report any sightings.


    I literally have no more announcement than that, so I''m hoping this fulfills the limits because I''m running out of what to say.


    Nope no good, so uh...more teasing! They''re in college now, we''ll be seeing a little more slice of life stuff. And look out for a few interesting interactions between some old characters who haven''t sent much time with each other yet.

 Chapter 76: The Morning After

    The next morning, Betty and Trevor walked to school together once again. It had become common enough that Betty''s parents were giving her knowing smiles when he came to pick her up. She hadn''t had the heart to tell them whatever they were picturing probably fell very far short of the truth.


    "It''s too bad we lost track of everybody at the party," Trevor said.


    "The important thing is that everyone enjoyed themselves."


    "You know what they''re all going to think we were doing."


    "I have noticed that we get accused of having sex when we did not," Betty saud thoughtfully. "And very frequently when we have actually snuck off so you can do that trick with...."


    "What have I said about specifics in public?"


    "...to make love, they don''t even notice we are gone. However, I believe we are most likely to be the victim not of false accusations but of the "five minutes after you left" trope."


    "Oh I know that!" Trevor laughed. "Everybody claiming that the party got really insane right after we left?"


    "Always five minutes," Betty concluded. "Nerds are not immune. Kyle and Evan have done it to me on several occasions."


    "Well we''re not letting them get away with it!" Trevor insisted "We know damn well it was just another stupid school social event."


    "They will be starting soon," Betty pointed. "There''s Tanya."


    They approached Tanya, who was telling on her phone.


    "No! No I will NOT be paying for the damage to the strip mall! Yes, alright, technically it''s the Myrden zone of influence but it was intrusion by a foreign power that...oh hi guys, listen don''t do anything the government says today until we get this mess sorted out alright? Great see you at class."


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    Tanya walked away, still arguing on the phone, leaving Betty and Trevor blinking in her week.


    "Well Tanya has trouble with the government all the time," Trevor said reasonably. "Better leave her to it."


    Their path was suddenly blocked by the looming figure if Benny Gold.


    "Benny!?" Trevor saud incredulously.


    "Yeah hey guys," he said. "I just want you to know,nim not trying to be a jerk. I''m just observing. I''m here for your protection, really."


    "Uh, okay..." Trevor said.


    "Great!" Benny smiled, slapping Trevor on the arm. "Gotta go. I''ll see you in class."


    Benny disappeared into the crowd. Before they could even process that a woman they''d never seen before stepped in front of them, an Asian girl with hair so blonde it was white.


    "I will no longer attempt to kill you," she said. And she was gone.


    "I no longer have any idea what''s going on," Betty admitted.


    A few moments later they bumped into Kyle and Jenny, who were having a...bizarre conversation.


    "No, I don''t think so."


    "Yes, we''re trying."


    "Ooh, yeah! With a little marmalade!"


    "Only on Tuesdays."


    "Why are you talking like that?" Trevor asked.


    "Like what?" Jenny asked.


    "Like there is a third person we can''t see supplying part of the conversation we can''t hear."


    "Because there is," Kyle sighed, then watched their expressions. "Wow this is actually REALLY frustrating I don''t know how you survived it alone."


    "Survived what?"


    "Never mind!" Jenny said. "Sorry about this, but would you be willing to take part in an experiment?"


    "I would be eager to take part in an experiment," Betty said, adjusting her glasses. The next moment someone shoved her from behind.


    That was strange," Betty said. "Someone must have bumped in to me."


    The wind was being really annoying today, too. Almost like something was poking her in the side of the head. She reached up to wave it away.


    "Oh that is weird," Kyle scratched his head. "She actually has no idea she''s grabbing your hand."


    "She''s not grabbing my hand," Trevor pointed out, confused.


    "Never mind!" Jenny said brightly. "Thank you far being a part of the experiment. I promise this will all make sense once the project is completed"


    Betty and Trevor watched their friends walk away, an odd space between them.


    "It has occurred to me that possibly something strange actually happened after we left the party," Betty said.


    "I was having the same thought. And no one seems to have time to explain it. Wait...is that Ammeline?"


    "A pink hoody is not her usual clothing," Betty pointed out.


    "No seriously, that''s the bag she caries her sword in. Hey, Ammeline! What happened at the party last night?"


    Their friend turned around slowly, peeking out of her hood. Her eyes wide, she pulled the hood down like she was tearing off a bandaid. A crown of thorny branches and wildflowers was growing out of her head.


    "It got real weird guys!"

 Chapter 77: Jackalope

    The night of the party....


    Ammeline wasn''t even sure she wanted to GO to the party. She was having enough trouble with her parents as it was. Not that she was likely to give in, never that, but there was something to be said strategically for not pouring fuel on the fire. On the other hand, there was something to be said for her own sanity in leaving the house to where they couldn''t heckle her.


    She''d settled for making her way out of the house and into the yard. In her party dress p, a shimmering thing her parents didn''t approve of. Her house was big, her yard bigger, so she got a good distance from the house before she picked a bench to sit down on, kicking her heels in the dirt as she tried to decide whether or not to go.


    Something hit her in the forehead and she looked up angrily, then down. An acorn. She''d been hit in the head with an acorn. That... didn''t make any sense. There were trees at the edge of the property, but the bench was set on a path that went through open grass. As she looked down at the acorn, trying to puzzle it out, something hit her right on the crown of the head. She looked up, glaring...


    And saw the jackalope standing near the treeline, next to a pile of acorns. It bounced one up and down with a paw. It took Ammeline a moment to remember the name "Jackalope." It kind of went like this: "That''s a rabbit with antlers...that has a name...jabbapope...no, wait, jackalope!"


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    She also had a sneaking villain she''d just thrown in "jabbapope" as padding, and was a little ashamed of herself.


    "Stop that!" She said. "Are you sentient? Can you talk?"


    The jackalope twitched it''s ears at her.


    "Okay, so you''re like Betty''s cat then. Fine. Are you throwing acorns at me for any particular reason?"


    More ear twitching, and a gesture into the trees.


    "You want me to follow you..."


    Ammeline pursed her lips.


    "That sounds like a mildly terrible idea. But I''m also kind of bored, and it''s something to do instead of deciding to go to the party..."


    She looked down from where she''d dropped her bag. The fencing sword went EVERYWHERE with her now. No exceptions. She pulled it out of the bag and strapped it around her waist.


    "Alright I''m making a terrible decision. But at least I KNOW that''s what I''m doing. I''m making it for my own reasons and knowing fully what I''m getting into. After all, what could this jackalope be leading me to that I can''t handle!? Ahahahahahaha!"


    As usual, the laugh helped get her brain in order, and she marched confidently off after the creature. It lead her into the forest...and to a tree with an archway growing into the side of it.


    "Well I don''t know what I was expecting, but I think this is a step to interesting for me."


    The jackalope pointed firmly towards the archway.


    "No, no I don''t think I WILL walk through a magic doorway alone into god knows what."


    She glared at the jackalope. The jackalope glared back.


    "THEN YOU ARE COWARD, AS WELL AS OATHBREAKER!" The Jackalope intoned with a voice like thunder reverberating between crashing boulders. "AND YOU WILL DIE FOR YOUR CRIMES!"


    The rabbit like form disappeared and was replaced with a tall, slender man with pointed ears and blue skin who lunged at her with a gleaming blade.

 NOTE: LOST CHAPTERS RESTORED! IM A MORON!

    So IF you''ve been reading for the past several weeks and gotten really confused by the plot, it''s not your fault! It is of course mine. In the chaos from the storm which killed my building and forced me to move, I accidentally screwed up posting FIVE CHAPTERS you all never got to see. FIVE.


    Meaning for you all, Valerie and Hanna just SHOWED UP out of nowhere. No wonder you were confused.


    The missing chapters are in their right place now, appearing as the new chapters 67 - 71. Thank you again to all my longtime and dedicated readers who actually stuck with me through this. My only excuse is my house got directly hit by an actual tornado.


    This story has been unlawfully obtained without the author''s consent. Report any appearances on Amazon.


    Anyway we''re back on track and thanks again, you might wanna bounce back and check what you missed sorry about that. Hey, it''s five extra chapters of your beloved webnovel right? Think of it that way it''s not so bad!!


    Yeah. I know. I''m sorry guys. Thanks for reading and I hope you continue to enjoy What Did I Wish For!

 Chapter 78: An Awakening Within the Fey

    Ammeline swerved out of the way as the man lunged at her with his blade. She dodged two more lunges, slipping her sword out of the bag and drawing it. On his third thrust she clashed blades with him, and age finally had a chance to examine her opponent.


    He wasn''t human. He looked a little bit like Sylvanandra, the elf, but not quite. less human, more...alien, really. His limbs were too slender and long, his face too thin and aqualine. His skin was a deep blue, and his ears not just pointed by longer and thinner, sweeping back in a high arc over his shoulders. Sweeping back over them were the antlers, left over from his jackalope form. Or maybe he''d just been in the form of a rabbit, and he couldn''t get rid of the antlers when he transformed?


    His armor was leather, in dark blues and greyish greens, but the patches were cut to resemble leaves. His sword had a leaf motif to it as well, though the blade was long and thin. Though to Ammeline''s estimation...


    Well, he wasn''t very good with it.


    With her blade out the fight became...well, not QUITE a farce. He wasn''t that bad. But it took only a few exchanges for the eventual outcome to be obvious.


    "If you had talked in the first place we could have avoided this!"


    "Mortals uninitiated reside in the house!" The slender man responded in his gravely voice. "If you had honor you would have come without being goaded!"


    "I have no idea what you''re talking about!" Ammeline said, tiring of the pointless battle. She flicked her wrist, sending his sword tumbling away, them stuck her foot out to trip him. He landed on his back. She stepped on his chest and placed the tip of her sword on his neck. "Ahahahahahaha! Victory is mine! NOW we can talk!"


    The man glared up at her, though there was something strange I''m his eyes now.


    "Go ahead and kill me, unseelie dog!"


    Ammeline blinked.


    Then she blinked again.


    "Unseelie. As in...winter fairies?" She wasn''t exactly up on her fairy lore, but some things had been sinking in being around so much magical talk. Two kinds of faries, winter-fall and spring-summer...not that she had any idea how to tell the difference. Though things WERE begining to make a weird sort of sense...


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    "Do not play the fool!" Her captive spat. "And cease this bewitchment!"


    "What bewitchment?"


    "The spell you have placed upon me with your foot on my chest! You grind it into my bones like I am dirt on your shoe, yet I find my desires for you somehow enflamed! Are you part succubus?"


    Ammeline stared at the creature, who she now suspected to be a fairy, with cold, flat eyes.


    "Is every male of every species across all existence some kind of hopeless pig?"


    "Ah!" The fairy writhed. "You call me a pig and I desire you further! What witchery is this?"


    "It''s called perversion," Ammeline''s voice was dry. "Ordinary garden variety perversion. No magic necessary."


    "Your unseelie tricks will not sway me!"


    "Look you idiot..."


    "Guah! My loins!"


    Ammeline paused a moment to pinch the bridge of her nose.


    "I''m going to take my door off you now."


    "Oh, there''s no need, I''m kind of enjoying..."


    "That''s exactly why there''s a need! I''m going to take my foot off, and you''re going to respect the fact I won the fight, and we''ll talk like reasonable people."


    He sighed in slight disappoinment as she removed her foot from his chest.


    "Why am I still alive?" He asked. "If you are some agent of the unseelie..."


    "I''m NOT though!" Ammeline said. "I think there''s been a mistake. Weeks ago, I was fighting an elf sorceress oh my God that''s normal for me now anyway she had enslaved the local faries and I helped them out. I''m not part of your little fairy world feud, I''m a human."


    He looked up at her, still on his back on the ground.


    "You do appear to be human. And while I do still sense unseelie magic from you...yes, I believe it does taste more like a gift than an oath. We sensed unseelie magic in our lands or took it as a challenge that must be met."


    "So it''s all cleared up then?" Ammeline said. "I''ve lived in this town my entire life, I don''t need trouble with the local faries."


    "Not...quite," the fairy said. "It would make things much simpler, now that you are fairy touched, if you would present yourself to my queen. Which was...I could bring you as guest, instead of prisoner."


    "Oh..." Ammeline sighed. "Fine. I''ll meet your queen. But I''m well liked by both powerful wizards and the United States Government, just something to keep in mind."


    "Surely, by now just a formality. But first, would you mind stepping on me agaib? Just for a..."


    "No I will not!"


    "Oh very well." The fairy stood up and dusted himself off. "I am Mordechai Alchimar Solviten Onibelius, knight of the Seelie courts."


    "Y...your initials spell MASO?" Ammeline sputtered incredulously.


    "I...suppose they do, in the alphabet of this region of this realm. Your name, my slightly intimidating lady?"


    "Ammeline Trent. Alright maso, let''s go see your queen."

 Interlude: The Fairy Courts

    The faries say that in the dawn of days, there was only one court. On season, one wind, one tree, spreading out across an endless field of green. And in that field, the faries tended to the tree, not that it required much tending. It was work without purpose, without goal.


    Until the day the tree was shattered.


    The birth of what we now call the universe tore the tree in half, and fir the first time the faries experienced catastrophe. In the burning shards of all they had ever known, with a reality even more alien to them than the chaos growing from it''s shattered pieces, they scrambled to collect what they could, to keep it safe. And in the end, as the last echoes of the big bang reverberated around them, they experienced another new thing.


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    Their first disagreement.


    Some were horrified by the destruction, and argued they should take what they had saved and grow anew, a new eternal tree, a new eternal field, a return to their quiet, endless toil.


    Some had seen the destruction and saw within it hope. Change for the first time. They saw the new world rising from the chaos, and wondered what other new things destruction could bring.


    Of course, you see the problem. They were both just as wrong as they were both right.


    In time, they became a part of the forming universe. Growth and destruction, life and death, yin and yang. Those who championed growth became called Seelie, the warmth and growth of spring and summer. Their counterparts became Unseelie, the cold and chill of winter, the death and rot that feeds new life in spring. Both vital, both necessary. And is the way of all things that think...still hating each other, over conflicts long past.


    It was also around the time the two courts were formed that a stranger came to visit both of them, offering promises. He wasn''t anything they''d ever seen before, a flickering laughing thing made of the fires that had birthed the universe. In time, they would call him the first of the genies, and curse the deal they''d made with him....


    But that''s a story for later.

 Chapter 79: Forest Wisdom

    Through the portal things were...odd.


    They were in a forest, that much was abundantly clear. Sort of a more forresty forest than any Ammeline had ever seen before. The trees weren''t any kind she recognized, but then she wasn''t exactly an expert on trees. But they were more...alive, more vibrant than she was used to. The canopy was dense, the undergrowth denser, and all through it there was the sound of something chirping and scuttling in the forest, as if the life was as dense as the foliage. The air was think and heavy, almost jungle-like. And the ground was...wrong. It spiraled off in all directions, twisting, and she was sure she could see places in the distance where it curled like something in a dream or nightmare.


    The only clear path was a long, twisting road through the forest. But Ammeline wasn''t about to trust that, not after everything.


    "Maso!" She called back. "Is this the right way?"


    "Yes we just follow the road, lady Ammeline," the armored fairy said, walking along behind her. "It''s safer. There are...things...in the forest."


    "I''d figured that much out myself," Ammeline said dryly. "I forgot your actual name, what was it? I can''t just keep calling you Maso."


    "Oh, yes you can!" He said. "It''s fine!"


    "No really," Ammeline said. "What''s..."


    "You could call me anything you like really. Like...like loser. I did lose to you. Or dirt, because you put me in the dirt. Or...piggy?"


    "Maso it is then," Ammeline said. "You''re disgusting."


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    "Unglgngly!" The fairy moaned. "Your witch magic!"


    "I''m starting to really hate fairies," Ammeline groaned, rubbing her temples. As they walked along, two hulking figures blocked their path. They wore gray pants, and were covered in blue, wrinkly skin.


    "Oh no," Maso said. "Grobolgs."


    "Do we fight them?" Ammeline asked. "Are they monsters?"


    "Yes they''re monsters, no you can''t fight them," Maso said. "I didn''t realize there were any in the area. If they''ve set up a barrier, we can''t pass unless we defeat them in an intellectual discussion."


    "Fairy magic," Ammeline said. "I suppose that makes them good guards."


    "Absolutely," Maso said. "This could be trouble."


    "Don''t be ridiculous!" Ammeline said. "Ahahahahahaha! Do you think I''ve never met a couple of inescapable intellectual blowhards before? I hang out with rich people. In the northeast!"


    She walked up to the two hulking monstrosities. Between the, in the air she could see a subtle web of glowing energy blocking the road.


    "A human!"


    "Who stinks of Unseelie."


    "Accompanied by one of the queen''s soldiers."


    "Strange."


    "Unusual."


    "Odd."


    "Bizarre. But can she discuss?"


    "I believe I can gentlemen," Ammeline said, stepping forwards. "I''m afraid I don''t know exactly how these challenges work, bit what exactly should we discuss?"


    "Ah, she asks a good question. What?"


    "Yes indeed what?"


    "And why?" Ammeline asked.


    "Why? What do you mean why?"


    "Well because it''s our fey nature, of course."


    "What kind of question is that, why?"


    "Why do we need to find a topic at all?" Ammeline asked. "After all, if it''s your very nature to discuss things, shouldn''t you have a list of topics prepared?"


    "Ah but you see that''s the thing. We debate anything."


    "Everything."


    "All things are fodder for discussion."


    "But still if you''re going to be making challenges," Ammeline said reasonably, "surely you should have a few set aside. This is like a duelist saying "oh I''m sorry, I just have so MANY swords, we can''t fight today."


    "Ah but there your example falls apart."


    "Indeed, you haven''t thought that one through."


    "In a duel the challenged chooses the weapons. We are the challenGERS."


    "Yes indeed. It should be YOUR choice."


    "So I may choose the topic of debate?" Ammeline said.


    "Within reason."


    "Must be something we can all engaged with."


    "Very well," Ammeline said. "My chosen topic is....the relative efficiency and inherent flaws of your method of posing intellectual challenges. And also, I win."


    The monstrous faries stared at her for a moment.


    They blinked.


    With a snapping noise, the web of energy between them disappeared.


    "She tricked us."


    "She trapped in a tautology."


    "I''m not sure that''s a true tautology..."


    "Come on," Ammeline said, pulling Maso along behind her.


    "That was amazing," Maso said. "I''ve never seen anyone get by a pair of Grobolgs that fast."


    "Ahahahahahaha!" Ammeline laughed. "That was nothing! You should see my uncle Freddie. He think he''s an historian."


    "Step on me?"


    "NO!"

 Chapter 80: Queen of the Faries

    They faced no further interruptions, and Ammeline wasn''t called upon to fight or beat anyone in checkers or anything like that, although Maso did seem to indicate not only was that an option it could also sometimes get lewd, making Ammeline just as happy it wasn''t something that had actually come up.


    "The queen''s chambers are just up here," Maso said.


    "Really?" Ammeline cocked an eyebrow. "I thought you''d take me to a city first."


    "We are in a city," Maso said. Ammeline looked around at the dense forest they were walking through.


    "No we''re not."


    "You can''t expect it to look like a human city. We''re here."


    Two guards stood on either side of the robe, armored like Maso. They saluted as he passed them by.


    "Are you important?"


    "I have high rank, though I probably don''t deserve it. Why not take some time to tell me how much I don''t deserve it..."


    "Enough," Ammeline glared.


    "Ooh, yes. Uh, I mean, prepare to meet the queen, mortal!"


    Maso lead the way into the queen''s chambers. This, at least, was something like she expected. The queen''s chamber was a huge marble hall, draped with living vines and branches and filled with fairies of every shape in size engaged in decadent revelry. Here, a writhing pile of blue skinned fay like Maso undulated in the shadows. There, small winged fairies chased each other around, leaving golden sparkles in their wake. In one corner, a Grobolg was in a heated argument with what appeared to be an actual brick wall. From the way the brick wall was sipping it''s drink, Ammeline assumed the Grobolg was losing.


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    And in the center of it all, the throne. It was a magnificent construction of vines and branches, large enough for a giant, with the crest of the backrest an explosion of different wildflowers. And sitting I''m the throne, the queen.


    She was about the size of a football resting on its end. Her outfit was a huge cone, with only flabby arms and a chubby cheeked face visible sticking out the sides. The cloth was patterned like leaves and vines, a deep dark green, contrasting with the preternaturally pale porcelain white of her skin.


    "You are the source of the Unseelie power hwe have felt in our realm?" The queen demanded, staring at her. "This court of the fey is sworn to the Seelie! Hwe will not tolerate incursions!"


    "Oh hwont you," Ammeline said dryly.


    The queen glowered.


    "You would DARE to make fun of the way in which hwe talk!?"


    "I would!" Ammeline declared. She looked around for something to stand up on to make a dramatic pose and, seeing nothing, she shoved Maso over into the dirt and got up on his back, ignoring the gurgling overjoyed strangling sounds he made. "Because I am Ammeline Trent, American princess! You would judge me for dealing with the Unseelie? Well I shall judge you! For intolerance, for terrible fashion sense, and for putting portals to your fairy realm on my property! Beg and I might forgive you!"


    The fairy queen bristled, the cone of fine cloth she wore vibrating in her fury.


    "Beg!" The queen sputtered. "Beg!? Hwe do not beg, human girl! I hwill send my strongest warrior to slay you, once you stop standing on him!"


    "Ahahahahahaha!" Ammeline laughed. "I''ve already beaten him!"


    "Oooooh!" The fairy queen sputtered. "Fine then! I''ll.... I''ll call upon the royal champion!"


    "Y-your Majesty," Maso stammered from underneath Ammeline. "The champion can only be called upon of someone challenges you for your crown..."


    "Fine then!" Ammeline declared. "I challenge you for your crown!"


    There was a gasp. Every fairy in the room turned to stare. The brick wall dropped it''s drink.


    "I accept!" Bellowed the queen.

 Chapter 81: The Royal Champion

    The area around the fairy queen''s throne rapidly emptied, leaving a wide open space for the duel to take place in. The only ones who remained in the area were the queen and Ammeline, glaring at each other a Ross the combined throne room/courtyard.


    "Well!?" Ammeline demanded. "Bring out your champion!"


    "Hwe certainly will!" The fairy queen glared back, clapping her hands. "Bring out the royal champion!"


    "Bring out the royal champion!" A voice echoed.


    "Bring out the royal champion!"


    "Bring out the royal champion!"


    "Bring out the royal..."


    On and on, the voices echoed through the forest, fading into silence. A silence that stretched on, broken only by the soft rustling of wind in the leaves. Finally, an undulating shadow began to unfold behind the queen''s throne. A shape slinked out of the darkness and into the light. Ammeline stared at her opponent in horror.


    "What is...but that''s...I don''t....WHAT!?"


    "HAHA!" The fairy queen laughed. "Regretting your foolish arrogance now!? Hwe will watch our champion''s blades cut you to ribbons!"


    "Aye yer majesty," the champion said in a rolling brogue. "We''ll not have ta worry, I''ll clear this up in a shake and a jiff."


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    Then he doffer his hat to the queen with one of his arms.


    With one of his eight arms.


    Because the champion was a giant octopus.


    The champion was an octopus the size of a sofa wearing a heavily plumed musketeers hat.


    "This is insane!" Ammeline said. "For that matter it''s unthematic! Aren''t you forest faries!?"


    "Me family is third generation immigrant," the octopus explained. "Very established family."


    "Oh wonderful!" Ammeline drew her sword. "Whatever! I''ll win anyway! Ahahahahahaha!"


    "Yer confident," the octopus said, drawing eight rapiers from the ring of sheaths around it''s body. "I''ll give ye points for spirit. But yer not taking me queen''s throne while Kalbert Abernathy has ought to say about it! Defend yerself!"


    He spun towards her, blades flashing, and she me his strokes with hers, batting the blades out of the way. But they just kept coming. He twirled along the ground, bringing fresh blades towards her in rapid succession. Ammeline hissed and spun under the whirling blades, stabbing for the body of the octopus, but he hurriedly backed away.


    "I think I see the flaw in your fighting style!" Ammeline said.


    Ammeline dashed forwards, pressing the attack.  The octopus backed up, blocking Ammeline''s swings.


    "It only LOOKS like you''ve got a huge advantage in swords. But you need your tentacles to move around. And even if you were sitting still, you can''t bring all of them to attack at once without getting in each other''s way! So really it''s only like fighting two or three extra people. Easier, because you all have to come from the same direction. If I keep you on the defensive you can barely even do that!"


    "Not bad!" Kalbert called back, fending off he blows. "Most people I fight don''t figure that out."


    "Ahahahahahaha! That''s because you overwhelm them right away with that spin move, isn''t it?"


    "Yer not wrong!" The octopus laughed. "But I got other tricks!"


    His tentacles flickered, and suddenly he was high in the air, a whirling mass of blades plummeting towards her from the sky.

 Chapter 82: Face to Face to Face

    The swashbuckling octopus (say it ten times fast I dare you) descended in a whirling storm of flashing blades, ready to cut Ammeline to ribbons as he fell towards her. There was a moment where time stood still.


    Ammeline considered her position. The threat above her. The battlefield. She steeled herself....


    And jumped three paces backwards.


    Kalbert Abernathy''s blades, all right if them, impaled the ground beneath him up to the hilt. He stood there, still gripping the handles, as a hush settled over the watching crowd. Ammeline looked at her with her arms crossed in front of her. The still moment lasted for a moment. Then another. Then again, until moments could only be described as minutes.


    "You''re stuck, aren''t you?" Ammeline asked.


    "Bah! Ye won''t best Kalbert Abernathy so easily!"


    The octopus struggled against the swords for a moment.


    "You could always fight without the swords," Ammeline suggested.


    "And have ye cut my tentacles off!?"


    "Well yes I would do that," Ammeline admitted. "Unless you surrendered."


    "Kalbert Abernathy won''t surrender a duel, ye poison tongued vixen!"


    "Ahahahahahaha!" Ammeline laughed. "Well I can respect that."


    She pulled her foot back and booted the octopus as hard as she could. She miscalculated a little. She''d kind of forgotten she had super strength while she was holding the sword. What had been intended to gently urge him away from the swords instead sent him flying up into the air, where he bounced off a tree and slammed into a crater on the ground.


    "Ahahahahahaha!" Ammeline laughed. "Seems to ME as if I am victorious! Which means..."


    "The new queen of the fairy court!" The faries cheered.


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    "Oh! Yes, well, I declare myself off limits and otherwise put the old queen back in charge. Where is she?"


    "She ran away when you started winning the duel," one of the Faries called out.


    "Fine, whoever''s next in charge..."


    "But what about your coronation?" Someone shouted.


    "I do NOT want a coronation," Ammeline said. "I''ve spent too much time on this already."


    "I don''t know if they give you options..."


    "They who?" Ammeline blinked.


    And then everything disappeared in a wave of green light.


    Ammeline found herself floating...someplace else. She wasn''t an expert on magic, or an expert on alternate dimensions, or faries, or anything like that. But where she had just been had been someplace with air. Here, there was...


    It was like time was upside down and space was made of the wrong stuff. To her eyes it looked like an empty black void, but it FELT like floating in an ocean she could breathe. And every sense screamed at her it wasn''t empty.


    An impression reinforced when two faces floated out of the darkness. Or...masks? Both looked like the faces of beautiful women. One was dark green, the other pale blue. The green one was decorated with gleaming emeralds, the blue with rubies, intricate designs all around their stern, feminine features.


    "Look sister, a mortal comes for the coronation."


    "It''s been centuries."


    "How interesting."


    The voices echoed out from behind the masks. Ammeline got the sense the masks were just avatars, symbols representing creatures she couldn''t see...


    "And do you taste that, sister?"


    "She tastes of both our courts...and genie."


    "Yes, of genie. How strange..."


    "I know a genie," Ammeline said. "She''s my friend. And my other friend''s girlfriend. Do faries have a problem with genies?"


    "Do you hear her tone, sister?"


    "Yes! She can''t even perceive us, but still..."


    "If we have a problem with genies we will have a problem with HER. She makes it very clear."


    "To answer your question, mortal, genies and faries have a complicated history. But the last genie to infuriate us was usually male, so we probably have no problem with your friend."


    "Well good," Ammeline said. "Who are you?"


    "Why I am Titania."


    "And I am Maeve."


    "The queen of the Seelie..."


    "And Unseelie."


    "I thought the two fairy courts hated each other."


    "Things are more complicated than that. Anyone who would be a queen should understand."


    "I didn''t really want to be queen. Not of this random fairy kingdom anyway. It just seemed like the best way to avoid being bothered."


    "That''s not how being queen works."


    "Bother bother bother, that''s all it is."


    "But you are interesting."


    "And there are things we could use a mortal champion for..."


    "We approve."


    "You shall be queen."


    "You''re not listening," Ammeline said. "I don''t WANT..."


    The mouths of the faces opened, and power flowed from between their lips, crashing into Ammeline''s body like crackling lightning.

 Chapter 83: Crowned a Queen

    Goldie and Evan stared at Ammeline. Goldie was in full shock mode, although Evan''s face had gone completely neutral flat.


    "...and then I woke up outside the fairy kingdom with this!" She pointed to the flowers growing out of her head. "I think it''s my crown? Or something? But now I''m a fairy queen and I have no idea what I''m going to do about it!"


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    Evan and Goldie shared a look.


    "Didn''t you call yourself an American princess?" Evan pointed out.


    "I know you''d use my words against me!" Ammeline glared. "But you know...you ARE right. I''m am born for authority and position..."


    Ammeline stood up straight, a hand over her chest.


    "Ahahahahahaha! Yes! Yes I can think of this as practice for ,y inevitable presidential run! Tonight I''ll go back to that fairy kingdom and set things in order! I will..."


    She reached up and touched the flowers growing out of her hair.


    "...figure out a way to deal with these flowers on my head."

 Chapter 84: Compounding Problems

    Kyle and Jenny sat next to each other in their very first REAL class in college. The room was essentially a small arena, semicircles of chairs behind semicircles of desks sloping down towards a central stage with a huge screen taking up most of the wall behind it. Overall, Kyle wasn''t feeling very comfortable with everything, because of who else was in the room.


    "What''s she doing here?" Kyle hissed, gesturing towards where Hanna was sitting, staring straight ahead and completely ignoring them.


    "I think she''s still a student right?" Jenny said. "And I bet she''s still supposed to watch you. I thought you were going to ask about her."


    Jenny gestured over to where Sylvanandra was sitting, smirking at them.


    "No we KNOW what she''s doing here," Kyle pointed out. "She told us. I''m not happy about it, but at least we know."


    "It''s not so bad. We''re stronger than both of them, so..."


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    "And then there''s him!" Kyle pointed behind them to where Benny was sitting. He gave them a little wave. "We don''t know if we''re stronger than him or not..."


    "But he''s here to bodyguard us, so it''s okay if he''s stronger than we are! I mean isn''t he supposed to be?"


    "I dunno if I trust agent Nunez," Kyle said.


    "Awww but she''s nice!"


    "She''s also got a job to do. We''re not her priority. And we COULD be a big problem for her. It''s possible we''d end up on opposite sides in the future..."


    "I don''t think so!" Jenny said with a perky smile. "I think Agent Nunez is one of our friends! And I trust all our friends. Don''t you?"


    "I mean I guess so," Kyle sighed. "That question was kind of a trap though, since I don''t know if I count Nunez as a friend. I trust everybody who we trained in the forest with."


    "Well that''s all we need then! New adventures! Shared experiences!"


    "I guess. I just don''t know...if...we..."


    That, Kyle thought, just wasn''t fair.


    He hasn''t said anything. Not "as long as nothing else happens" or "at least it can''t get any worse" or anything like that. Hadn''t even been thinking about it. He was thinking about the problem posed by Agent Nunez. He had done nothing to incite the universe to punish him with another thing to worry about.


    So when the professor walked in with a huge, curving pair of spectral horns growing out of her head, he could only curse an uncaring universe.

 Chapter 85: Temporary Gods

    Kyle kept his eyes locked on the teacher as class started. No, not like that. He was sitting right next to his literally magically beautiful girlfriend, after all. No hid focus was drawn by the ethereal horns over her head as she started to speak. But while he was watching, something...happened.


    No, stop it, stop being horny. Despite the fact that she was literally a horny teach, this isn''t that kind of story, the sex scenes are all dramatically justified and....


    Despite this chapter getting out of hand the plot continued. The teacher stood at the front of the class, still talking, but a second, ethereal version of her walked out of her original body, until there were two of her at the front of the class, one teaching and apparently human, the other a ghostly wraith of red and blue light standing a few feet away and staring right at Kyle. He looked around to see if anyone noticed, but no one hand. He grabbed Jenny''s arm to ask what she thought was happening.


    His hand passed right through her.


    "I''ve put us out of phase with the rest of the world," the teacher said. "It will give us time to talk. Did you catch my name? I know it''s been a rough morning for you..."


    "Professor Greenstone right?" Kyle said. No one around reacted, all eyes locked on the hornless version of her that was still teaching. "Out of phase? What does that even mean?"


    "Look," she rolled her eyes. "Do you want an explanation on the nature of sub-linear time and quasi particular fold space based on magical and scientific principles your universe hasn''t even invented the tools it would need to know it doesn''t know them yet, or do you want to know who I am and what I''m doing here?"


    "You''re the professor, you''re supposed to come up with the lesson plan." Kyle shrugged.


    "Very well then. You see, time and space are actually composed of soectro particle-wave variations, like radiation is, and some of those can be understood as non linear quasi folded-"


    "Alright alright!" Kyle held his hands up in surrender. "You''ve made your point. Who are you and what do you want?"


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    "What I WANT is to stop existing."


    "You want to die?"


    "No, stop existing. They''re not the same thing. I want to go back to being nothing."


    "That...sounds a lot like death to me."


    "No, see, nothing IS a thing, just not a thing like you think of as a thing thing...gah, this is what I''m saying! You don''t know what you''d need to know to know you don''t know the things you''d need to know to know what I''m talking about! Look, I want to stop existing and that isn''t the same as death, just...accept that I''m your squishy monkey brain."


    Kyle wondered if Dr. Myrden or someone like that would have an easier time following this conversation. But he could handle things he didn''t understand, mental enhancement or not there was plenty of that in the world.


    "Fine so who are you? And what does that have to do with me?"


    "Ahah! Good questions!" She clapped her hands together with a sharp smack. "And one answer for both. I''m your wish."


    Kyle blinked.


    "My wish?"


    "Yes. I am your wish. I am the god brought into being by the magic of your genie friend there for the sole, brief purpose of altering reality so that your wish comes true."


    "That''s how it works? Each wish gets a god?"


    "Yep."


    "Are you the god of just my wish, or all three?"


    "Another good question! I''m the god of your way sh, specifically. But as the primary supplicant...you know, the one who actually found the genie... I was in charge, and the most powerful. But your two friends GOT their wishes granted already. The other wishes went back to nice, cool, relaxing nothingness. I''m the only one stick here because you won''t go ahead and just...TAKE it!"


    "Take what?" Kyle asked. "What WAS my wish? Was all this power not my wish?"


    "It was part of it, but not....I can''t tell you what your wish does. I literally can''t take any action that would prevent your wish from coming true,even if I wanted to, and in every version of reality where I tell you it ends up not happening. But this is so frustrating! You''re screwing me up on what I thought would be the EASY part!"


    "How can I help you if I don''t even know what you need me to do?"


    "I''m pretty sure knowing I have your best interests at heart...the deepest wishes of YOUR heart even...you''ll listen to me when I tell you to do something crazy later on."


    Kyle stared at the wish god for a minute.


    "Okay," Kyle said. "That''s fair. I''ll THINK about any advice you give me."


    "It would be better for both of us if you did more than think, but I''ll take it."


    "Hey...can you tell me what the other two wishes were?"


    A complicated look contorted the wish god''s face.


    "No. I''m sorry, no I can''t. We''re prohibited from telling anyone about other people''s wishes, on the VERY rare occasions we exist long enough to talk to people at all. And I wish....nope, I can''t it''s actually stopping me. But I feel like you''re going to regret one of them."


    "Why?"


    The wish god hesitated.


    "The deepest wishes of a heart can be... surprising. You can''t always tell who someone is on the surface. And they don''t always work out well for other people. I''m sorry, but granting one of the wishes granted the same time as yours is going to cost you something you wouldn''t want to lose. I can''t say more than that, reality is already tugging at me. Just listen when I give you weird advice, okay?"


    She stepped back into her physical body, the one doing the teaching, and Kyle felt Jenny grab his arm.


    "I thought there was something magical about Professor Greenstone but now I''m not sure...you okay? That''s a WEIRD look on your face..."

 Chapter 86: The Big Question

    Jenny looked pensive as they walked out of class.


    "I''ve never heard of anything like that!" Jenny said. "Wish god''s? She IS your wish?"


    "I was kind of hoping we had some kind of guidebook," Kyle grumbled. "What do you think she meant about part of my wish not being ready? That I''m avoiding it?"


    "That part is easy. Wishes change the world so that what you wished for happens. Sometimes that''s one change, sometimes that''s dozens. But it''s like...like if you were supposed to meet your true love, the wish would make her car break down so she had to walk to work, then your bus would be late, then it would jostle the man in the hot dog costume so he spilled the coffee..."


    "What the heck are you even talking about?"


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    "Look, EVERYTHING that happens to you is the result of a bunch of other things, right? A whole bunch of little coincidences that just happen to make you and someone else be in the right place at the right time for whatever happens to happen. Millions of things resulting in one outcome. Meeting someone, falling down the stairs, discovering your favorite food, whatever."


    "Okay, I think I get that."


    "Well, wishes make those happen on purpose. A specific chain of them to result in the outcome you wished for. They WILL change reality, but wherever they can they make use of what''s already true. And they CAN''T affect free will, so if they need a person to do something they really have to get creative. It sounds like this wish god keeps setting up all the little coincidences to finish out your wish...and YOU keep not taking it."


    Kyle looked concerned.


    "I can''t think of anything though."


    "You probably don''t notice you''re doing it..."


    "No you don''t get it. I can''t think of anything else I want. Beautiful girlfriend. Great friends, who are as happy as I am through this whole situation, Actual literal magical superpowers. What the hell else could I want? I..."


    Kyle was cut off when someone slammed into him, bouncing off his sturdy, magically reinforced frame. He looked down to see a red headed girl staring up at him with sparkling, dewy eyes. The books she''d been carrying were all over the floor.

 Chapter 87: Abby

    "Oh geeze I''m sorry," Kyle said, reaching down to pick up the books. "Are you alright? Let me help."


    "I-i''m fine," the girl said, picking up the books herself. "I''m sorry, I wasn''t looking where I was going. And you''re... large."


    "Yes he is!" Jenny said, handing over a few books. "It''s very pleasing!"


    "Jenny is....is this one of the times where you KNOW what you''re saying, or..."


    "Oh right! I''m Jenny. This is Kyle. This is our invisible friend Valerie who you are about to forget I mentioned."


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    "I...what...who?"


    "Don''t worry about it."


    "Oh okay. Well I''m Abby. I just moved into town and I''m...well, I''m not very good at being around people yet."


    "I know how that can be," Kyle said sympathetically.


    "I don''t know if I believe that," Abby blushed.


    "I kind of had a glow up senior year of highschool," Kyle said dryly. "Where were you headed to?"


    "Uhm...I don''t even know." Abby pulled out her phone. "Oh! Uh...lunch. I guess I don''t need all these books out for that. Sorry I''m REALLY frazzled."


    "That''s okay, were going to eat too!" Jenny said cheerfully. "Wanna come along? If we talk to the air sometimes it''s just because there''s an invisible friend of ours you can''t perceive."


    "What?"


    "Exactly."


    "If you want...I don''t really know anybody yet."


    "Fine with me," Kyle shrugged.


    "Great! Come on!"


    "But wait I...ack!"


    Jenny grabbed Abby''s arm, almost making her spill her books as she dragged the hapless girl off towards the cafeteria.

 Chapter 88: Land of Milk and Honey

    The University cafeteria was a lot bigger than the one in the high school, and it reminded Kyle more of a food court. There were even a few chain restaurants he recognized dotted around the place.


    "We can eat at all these places?" Kyle blinked.


    "Depends on your meal plan," Abby said. "It''ll say on your student ID card."


    Kyle pulled his ID card out and checked it. His grandfather had set things up...yeah, he didn''t know what "unlimited deluxe" meant specifically, but he had a feeling it was good.


    "Uhm...Kyle right?" Abby said. "Could you help? We''re uhm...your girlfriend she...she''s not responding and she won''t let go."


    Kyle turned his eyes away from the roomy and back towards the women with him. Jenny was, indeed, somewhat catatonic, and had clamped hard onto Abby''s arm. The reason for her compromised state was evident.


    "Oh dear," Kyle sighed. "Here, let me try to get you out. She might be like this for a while. And get ready to grab her if she makes any sudden moves."


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    "Oh, uh, okay. What''s going on?"


    "Jenny is from...a different country. There were a lot if American foods she''d never tried before when she got here. One of them was, well...."


    He gestured to the sign in front of them, where an enormous red chicken in a chef''s hat gestured proudly towards a menu under the words "Nugget Barn."


    "She gets a little weird about it. Do you have feeling back in your arm yet?"


    "Yeah." Abby flexed her arm. "What do we do about her?"


    Jenny had begun muttering in what might have been Arabic,though it was just as likely to be some even older language.


    "We hope that isn''t a spell and wait for her to bolt."


    "For... what?"


    It happened in an instant. Even with his senses enhanced with magic, he just barely saw Jenny start to move. His arm shot out and caught her by the collar, jerking her up short as outstretched arms reached for the Nugget Barn.


    "But noooooo!" Jenny said. "Kyle, you don''t understand! I hath seen the fields of paradise, beyond the sweetwater river to the land of milk and honey! And an entire store full of nuggets!"


    "It''s our first day and you''re not obliterating the dining room on our first day. Oh look, our friends."


    "But... but!"


    Despite being so much larger it seemed to have about the same number of people in it, clustered in small islands around tables. As they walked in they saw Evan and Goldie already sitting at a table, waving them over. Kyle dragged Jenny over to them Abby in tow.


    "Hey guys, this is Abby, Jenny kind of kidnapped her."


    "Uh hi," Abby waved her hand weakly.


    "Please sit on Jenny while I go buy her food? I don''t want anything unfortunate happening to the nugget hut. Is there anything you want specifically?"


    "All the nuggets."


    "Jumbo meal it is, just sit here and don''t destroy anything."

 Chapter 89: In the Club

    Jenny sat with Evan, Goldie, Valerie, and her new friend Abby but her attention was mostly on Kyle and his progress in the chicken nugget line. She did notice that the others had left a space for Valerie to sit without ever actually acknowledging she was there, which was funny, but not nearly as interesting as the nugget counter.


    "Maybe I should go up there and keep him company," Jenny said.


    "No!" Evan snapped. "Under no circumstances are you to go to the counter! You''re not supposed to start any more international incidents!"


    "I can hang out with my boyfriend without blowing something up..."


    "Can you really?" Goldie raised an eyebrow.


    "No," Jenny wilted.


    "We should talk about last night," Evan said. "But uh...are we uh...hey Abby, are you...read in?"


    "Read in?" Abby blinked.


    "You know. One of Us."


    "Do you....eh?" Goldy made a wiggling finger motion.


    "Oh uh..." Abby''s eyes got a little wide. She flushed slightly, hands on her cheeks, looking away demurely. "No, no I never have..."


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    "But you know about it?" Evan said.


    "Well I mean, I''ve read a few things, you know..."


    "Oh but you can learn!" Goldie said encouragingly. "When I first got involved with everybody, I could barely do it. But everyone was really supportive!"


    "E... everyone?" Abby flushed redder.


    "You''re already better than I was doing," Evan said. "I was just going along with my day and then BOOM! It was happening to me. I made the best of it though. It helps that I''m so naturally talented."


    "He is!" Jenny said enthusiastically.


    "There''s nothing natural about it," Goldie grumbled.


    "Who cares if it''s unnatural as long as you''ve got the skills?"


    "Oh my," Abby said.


    "You can probably learn!" Goldie said. "I''d be happy to practice with you!"


    "Oh..."


    "I bet Tanya would too!"


    "Tanya Myrden is a part of this!?"


    "Oh yeah! She hasn''t got as much energy as a lot of us, but she knows more than the rest of us combined."


    Abby had turned bright red and was shaking. She held up a hand.


    "Wait...slow down...I just...are you all inviting me to...join a sex cult?"


    The entire table froze stock still as they replayed their conversation from the point of view of an ordinary person.


    Then Jenny burst out laughing.


    "It wasn''t me this time!" She cackled. "You all did it! With your own language! This one isn''t my fault!"


    "You didn''t realize what we were saying either!" Evan snapped.


    "Yeah but neither did any of you!" She howled.


    Kyle approached the table, carrying two trays loaded with nuggets.


    "I''ve come to deliver the meat!"


    Jenny fell of her chair, vibrating and clutching her stomach.


    "So I uh..." Abby said.


    "There''s no sex cult," Goldie said.


    "No what!?" Kyle yelped.


    "We were talking about something else," Goldie continued.


    "Oh!" Abby said. "Oh, of course, that makes more sense."


    "Sorry to freak you out."


    "Yeah just a little freaked out." Abby''s eyes slid surreptitiously to the side. "Wasn''t interested at all..."


    "You know if you WANTED to organize a sex cult we could..."


    "No," Goldie said flatly.


    "I''m just saying we could consider it..."


    "I wouldn''t want to be part of any sex cult that would let you in too."


    "You... you''re already dating me."


    "Go ahead, throw my mistakes in my face."


    That got a laugh from the whole table, even Jenny with her mouth full of nuggets.


    "What WERE you guys talking about though?"


    Everyone looked at her.


    "What were you asking me about before the misunderstanding?"


    "Oh."


    "Uh,"


    "Eh...."


    "Um..."


    A silence settled over the table.


    "Magic is real!" Goldie suddenly blurted out, holding up her hand and conjuring a swirling ball of light.

 Chapter 90: Keeping Secrets Badly

    Everyone at the table stared at Goldie''s upturned palm, and the swirling mystical lights within.


    "Goldie!" Evan blurted out.


    "I''m sorry I couldn''t take it!" Goldie said. "I could see it now, weeks and weeks of us tiptoing around, pretending magic doesn''t exist, acting all weird, and what if we turned out to be really good friends with her? Now she''s feeling dejected and left out because we''re not telling her things and leaving her out, and it''s depressing and frustrating and I just saw it going on forever and I couldn''t take so here! Look! Magic!"


    She waved the magical lights in Abby''s face.


    "Like...magic magic?" Abby said. The others exchanged looks.


    "Yeah. Like magic magic," Kyle said. "Like wizards and everything. Man, Tanya is going to kill us."


    "She has a point though," Jenny said. Keeping magic a secret is hard. It probably would have been like she said."


    "Or we''d have had to start a sex cult," Kyle smirked.


    "That''s still on the table!" Evan grinned.


    "No. It isn''t," Goldie glared.


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    "Okay we''ll get beds."


    "EVAN!"


    "Uhm....can I get actual explanations?" Abby said, eyes still locked on the swirling magical lights.


    "Long story short? And still keeping a couple of secrets for the moment, we''re all kind of amateur wizards etc. Tanya comes from a long line of wizards, not really our secret to tell but it''s kind of out. She''s been teaching us."


    "Uhuh," Abby said. "So magic is real?"


    "That''s kind of implied," Evan said.


    "And I literally said it."


    "And Goldie said it."


    "But this makes so much sense!" Abby said. "So much weird stuff has been happening around here lately! Uhm, this is a secret right? Maybe you should put that away."


    "Oh yeah." Goldie killed the magical light show and closed here hand. "I just wanted to give you time to internalize everything."


    "No it makes sense," Abby said. "I''ve seen...some things. Nothing that was proof, but maybe I''m more ready to believe than a lot of people."


    "Well that was relatively painless," Kyle said, leaning back in his chair. "Yeah, I''m surprised too. Seems like our little circle just keeps growing."


    "Who were you responding too?" Evan asked.


    "Valerie. The invisible woman none of you can perceive and will forget I mentioned once I finish this sentence."


    The entire table stared at him, blinking slowly.


    "Yeah that was painless," Evan said.


    "Yeesh," Jenny grimaced. "Your curse is really freaky. But we''ll sort it out!"


    Everyone at the table ignored her.


    "Listen," Abby said. "Can I....hire you guys?"


    "Hire us?" Kyle said.


    "Is that what you call it? I just...there''s something very, very weird going on at my house. I could really use someone to look into it, and it''s all just so strange...magic could be a real explanation. And now I know some magic people!"


    "I mean we should help," Kyle said. "What? We should!"


    "To do that we have to explain all this to Tanya," Evan said. "And you just volunteered."


    "But Goldie gave up the secret!" Kyle sputtered.


    "Too late, you volunteered."


    "Don''t worry honey," Jenny wrapped her arms around Kyle''s neck. "Goldie gets to explain things to the person we REALLY need to be afraid of."


    "Who''s that?" Kyle asked, but before Jenny could answer a shadow fell over the table. Betty was holding a tray of food.


    "Hello. What are we talking about?" Jenny asked.


    "Starting a sex cult!" Jenny said.


    Betty placed the tray down on the table.


    "Do we have logistics? Schedules? Meeting times? Do we need a place to purchase equipment? Free for all orgies or are we discussing switching partners? I can''t participate unless Trevor is alright with it, of course, but either way I intend to record everything."


    Jenny fell off the chair, laughing again.

 Chapter 91: The Pipes

    "I don''t like it," Tanya glared at them. Kyle, Jenny, and Goldie had found a free period together to bring Abby to speak with her. "I DON''T like it. You''re all terrible at keeping secrets. We can''t just tell everyone we meet about our secret magical world!"


    "I still don''t really get why not," Jenny said.


    "Because the Uzbedis are hell bent on keeping it a secret," Tanya said, turning to Abby. "Since you''re new, the small middle eastern nation of Uzbedis is the last remnant of an ancient magical empire who have threatened to unleash mystical superweapons to prevent the secret of magic from ever being revealed."


    "Oh," Abby said. "Are you going to erase my memory now?"


    "No," Tanya said. "That kind of magic is absolutely horrible and can have terrible side effects. Welcome to the club. But we can''t keep DOING this!"


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    "C-" Abby started.


    "Yes I''ll do what I can to teach you magic. But I can''t promise you''ll be any good at it.


    Kyle frowned. Hadn''t he heard something about the government using memory altering magic after the big tree fight with Benny? What kind of side effects? But Jenny had already pulled the conversation along.


    "But Tanya it''s not just us," Jenny said. "It seems like everybody is doing a bad job keeping magic a secret. The fact that they did it at all is crazy! It''s like keeping water a secret. Or dirt. Magic''s as much a part of nature as air."


    "That''s a much longer conversation. One the Uzbedis are going to have to have eventually...but alright. You think something might be going on at your house that''s supernatural in nature. Bear in mind, it might be just be old groaning pipes. It''s usually pipes.


    Elsewhere, in a dusty basement....


    Well a lot of things, really. There were still scribbles on the wall from where Abby drew them as a child. There were toys she''d played with growing up. It was Abby''s basement, like a zillion other basements across the world.


    The air shimmered, and something seemed to twist, and suddenly a figure was standing there, a vague impression of a human for, shaped in crackling light. It waved a hand that looked like claws, and screamed before it disappeared.


    There was silence for a few minutes, then the old pipes let out a groaning sound.

 Chapter 92: I guess that answers that.

    Later that afternoon, they stood outside Abby''s house. The small team of investigators consisted of Abby, Tanya, Kyle, and Jenny. Abby because it was her house, Tanya for her knowledge, Kyle and Jenny as extra muscle.


    And Valerie was there, of course. Not that anyone but Kyle and Jenny knew that.


    The house itself wasn''t quite what they were expecting. It was large, rambling almost mansion that looked like it might have seen better days. It was the kind of new England home people liked to draw on murder mystery covers, with the curving roofs and occasional towers. All in all the house looked like a very good place to get murdered in. Not that he was dumb enough to say that out loud.


    "Well this looks like a good place to get murdered in," Tanya said, arching an eyebrow at the house.


    "I''d have expected Evan to say that line, if he was here."


    "Let''s not get into lines Evan would say if he was here. The way we all focus on that I''m starting to think he''s contagious."


    "He''s been better since he started dating Goldie!" Jenny pointed out.


    "Better isn''t good," Tanya said, still glaring at the building.


    "Uhm, I have zero context for what you''re all talking about, but can you tell me if my house is haunted?"


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    "Sorry," Kyle said. "Yeah. I dunno. Is it?"


    "Well there''s SOMETHING magical going on here," Tanya admitted reluctantly. "But that could just be because it''s so old. What''s the history of the house?"


    "It''s been in the family for almost two hundred years," Abby said, a little pride creeping into her voice. "There are all kinds of stories."


    "I''ll bet. But what''s been happening lately?"


    "Well lately people have been... disappearing."


    "Disappearing!?" Kyle said. This was starting to sound a little more serious than he''d expected.


    "Well... maybe. No one in the family or anything. It started about eight months ago, when the guy came in to fix the internet. He was here for a couple of hours, fixed it up, then asked if he could use the bathroom before he left. We never saw him again."


    "So he used the bathroom and left," Tanya said.


    "Couple of days later the police come by."


    "Oops."


    "Apparently he never showed up to his next appointment. No one had seem him. They tracked him to our house, but then he was just...gone. no proof he ever arrived anywhere else. His truck was gone, too. And that was kinda creepy...


    "Until it happened again, with our plumber. No cops this time. We called him to ask why he hasn''t billed us for the money yet, and we got his wife. She''s convinced he ran off with another woman. And there have been three more. The most recent one was last month. Pizza delivery guy. I''m the only one who''s looking into it...but we look like serial killers! Somebody should find out what happened. And if it keeps up someone is going to notice something''s going on...."


    "Alright that IS weird," Tanya said. "Okay. Let''s take a look in the house and see what we can find. Is your family around?"


    "Not today."


    "Good, then I can get a little weird. Not exactly my specialty, but I can at least see if there''s anything in here."


    They walked into the house, into a grand entryway with a hanging chandelier. There was a chill to the air, but Kyle wondered if what was just him psyching himself out. The place looked like a haunted house, why shouldn''t it feel like one? Besides, it wasn''t like ghosts were out of the question."


    "Let''s do the basics first," Tanya said, pausing in a corner of the room. "If everyone will please move away from the chandelier."


    "Why?" Jenny asked.


    "Rule number one of investigating a potential haunting: never stand directly underneath the chandelier. Okay good. I''m going to open up my mind just a little but, and see if I sense anything on theEEEEEERREEEEEEERREEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.....!"


    And with an unearthly scream, Tanya rose into the air with blood streaming from her eyes, nose and mouth.

 Chapter 93: The Dark Presence

    Kyle, Jenny, and Abby did the most logical thing they could think of: They began freaking out.


    Abby had only known for certain about magic for a few hours, though she''d suspected for longer than that. Jenny and Kyle had absolutely no idea what to do magically in a situation like this. Tanya rose into the air, dripping blood, arms spread wide, choking out gutteral words in some obscene mocker of language, her body trembling.


    But then the trembling stopped, and so did the chanting. She floated in the air, streaming blood...but then the blood exploded into a cloud of flower petals, a whirlwind of deep red rose petals filling the room.


    "Now what!?" Abby shrieked.


    "No wait!" Jenny said. "This might be good! Tanya''s magic is all flowery and stuff!"


    The wind of petals ceased, and Tanya collapsed to the floor, clutching her throat.


    "Oh," she coughed out a few stray petals. "That sucked."


    "I...Abby started, them stopped herself. "Are you okay?"


    "Yeah what she said," Kyle helped her up.


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    "I''m fine," Tanya looked sideways at Abby. "That wasn''t what you were going to say at first, was it?"


    "Oh!" Abby flushed. "Oh I uh...no."


    "You were going to ask if it was the pipes, weren''t you?"


    "Uhm, yes. But you just were coughing up blood so it felt wrong."


    "Next time be sarcastic, I had it coming. You''re right, you definitely have a ghost. And a petty, mean, nast homicidal one at that."


    "Can we fight it?" Kyle asked. "Even with all the crap the past few months I haven''t had to fight a ghost."


    "Easily," Tanya said. "It got me because I was being cocky and didn''t defend myself well enough. It''s not that strong. Come on, the three of us should chase it out of here in no time flat. But...let''s be careful, just in case it has any more surprises for us."


    *******************


    The dark force inhabiting the house was losing its mind. It had no more surprises. At first it had thought some amateur spell crafter was poking around the house, and had gleefully jumped at the chance to inhabit a real body and play around. But when it got inside that girl....


    Power. Terrible power. And she was probably the WEAKEST of the three magically aligned warriors the girl, Abby that was her name, had brought. One wasn''t even human, it didn''t know what she was or what she could do, and the one who Was human...he was like a sun exploding that wanted to punch him. A sledge hammer where the one it had possessed was a scalpel. It wouldn''t want to face any one of them, and all three we''re walking through the halls intent on destroying it.


    It had decided to run. It wasn''t magically bound to the house, not exactly, and while it hated having to find someplace else to live it didn''t see any other option. Maybe if it had a little more power...


    "Do you want it? More power I mean."


    The dark presence in the house froze in terror. It didn''t know what that girl downstairs was, but it at least had a general idea. The way someone who''s never seen a tiger can still identify it as "some kind of cat." But the entity that spoke to it now...


    Like gears and a great wheel, like thunder and rain, like a beginning that ends where it began. To speak with Kyle the Wish God had taken the form of a teacher, but to this entity it could more true to itself.


    It trembled a question into the universe.


    "Me? I''m a god. A small one, maybe, but still a god. And I need a few things to happen. So here, take some power. Go give those kids a good run for their money..."

 Chapter 94: Happy Thoughts

    A tremble ran through the house.


    Kyle didn''t know how else to describe it. It was like reality all around them shuddered, though there was no outward sign of it. It wasn''t something to be seen or heard or touched, just felt, deep in his bones.


    "What just happened!?" Abby asked, whirling around.


    "You felt it too? I thought you didn''t know anything about magic..." Jenny asked.


    "It''s her house," Tanya pointed out. "She''s connected to it. She''ll notice when something changes."


    "But it''s not my house anymore!" Abby said, her eyes darting around. Everyone looks the same, but it''s...it''s like visiting a strangers house you''ve been inside before! It all looks exactly the same but it''s not... it''s not mine!"


    "This doesn''t make any sense..." Tanya bit her thumbnail worriedly. "It shouldn''t be strong enough to do something like this, unless it got a whole bunch of power from somewhere...."


    There wasn''t an explosion.


    It was more like the FEELING of an explosion. The sense of everything bursting, everything being thrown and torn apart. But there was no sense of motion. In fact it felt like Kyle was standing perfectly still. It was everyone and everything else that moved. A moment where the world was twisted in a nightmare kaleidoscope.


    And then he was standing...in a hall. A big, long, empty hall that looked like it COULD be in Abby''s house...but wasn''t where he had been standing before. It seemed to go on forever in both directions.


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    "What the hell!?" Abby shrieked. Her eyes were way too wide, darting around the corridor. "What the hell is going on!?"


    This wasn''t good. Kyle could already tell that if this was an anime Abby would be getting shown with a close up of her forehead with a fish eye lense. The whole total breakdown bit.


    "This is crazy...I mean the blood, and the flowers, that was just Hollywood type stuff but this is my house, my house is attacking us, except it''s not my house, but it is, except it''s not, it is except it''s not it is except it''s not it is except it''s not it is except it''s not it is except it''s not it is except it''s not it is except...."


    "Hey!" Kyle grabbed her around the shoulders. "Hey look at me, okay? You''re alright. You''re okay. And I''m pretty strong too, okay? I''ll look after you until we can find everybody else."


    "What?" She blinked. "Oh. Yeah. Yeah okay."


    She slapped herself in the cheeks.


    "Okay! I''ll...be alright."


    "Yeah sorry," Kyle said. "I was pretty freaked out at first too. And my first magical thing was a lot nicer than this."


    "W-what was it?" Her voice was still trembling , but it didn''t sound like she was going to start chewing the walls.


    "Jenny appeared topless out of a lamp."


    Abby started laughing.


    "That does sound way nicer!" She laughed, collapsing into Kyle''s chest. "A whole lot better than an evil house. Wait, Jenny is a genie? Did I know that? I can''t remember if I knew that..."


    "I don''t remember if we told you either, and we''re both stressed out we can''t remember every conversation. You feeling better?"


    "Yeah the image of Jenny topless is making me feel better."


    "It works on me that way too," Kyle smirked.


    "Not like that!" She slapped his shoulder. She took a deep breath and stepped away from him, hugging herself tight.


    "Okay," she finally said. "I''m okay. Let''s get going. We can''t just hang around here."


    They started walking down the endless hallway, Abby clinging to Kyle''s sleeve with her fingers.

 Chapter 95: Stupid

    Tanya and Jenny found themselves in a room full of junk and old toys. Just by standing where she was, looking around with her completely mundane and magical senses, Tanya could find three things that were horribly, horribly wrong with the room.


    "This room looks bigger than Abby''s whole house," Jenny pointed out.


    "Yes that''s the third thing," Tanya nodded.


    "Third what?" Jenny blinked.


    "The horrible things about this room are, in descending order of how scary they are, how the hell we got here in the first place, the lack of doors, and the fact that it''s too big to actually exist."


    "Oh. I hadn''t thought it through that far. Some of these teddy bears are kind of cute."


    "Right," Tanya said. "Okay. So something happened and whatever was magically infesting the house got way more powerful all of a sudden. That''s....weird. And dangerous."


    "Maybe it had some power stored up somewhere? Or maybe it''s got a friend."


    "Stored power might make sense...if there''s an ally though, why didn''t we sense them? Well the first thing we need to do is get out of this room. Before something tries to kill us."If you encounter this narrative on Amazon, note that it''s taken without the author''s consent. Report it.


    "Yeah isn''t that weird?" Jenny said. "Why isn''t it trying to kill us?"


    "Maybe it used a lot of power changing the space," Tanya shrugged. "Maybe it''s busy messing with the others. Hopefully Abby''s alright. She''s the only one here who doesn''t have any magic at all."


    "Hey maybe that''s how it split us up!" Jenny said. "The ones with the most magic are me and Kyle, right? Raw power anyway. So I bet he and Abby are together!"


    "Oh," Tanya said, blinking in surprise. "That...makes a lot of sense. And splitting us up in pairs makes sense, he''d still need to reserve power. So the most and least powerful together, then the two in the middle."


    "Because if he made a team of two weak people he could squish really easily he''d have to deal with a STRONG team that could be a real problem for him! Not that you''re actually weak you know a lot about magic, but I don''t think he knows that. Or she. Or it. Whatever''s living in here. Or dead. Or UNdead..."


    "And we''ve officially stopped making sense," Tanya said. "Next thing we need is a way out of this room."


    "Mmm," Jenny said, and the two of them began walking through the rows and rows of stacked boxes, old appliances, and an honestly surprising number of teddy bears.


    "You don''t think I''m very smart, do you?" Jenny said after a couple of minutes.


    "What?" Tanya said. It was so different from everything her mind had been on she could barely keep up.


    "I''m not mad about it," Jenny said. "I can just tell. You don''t think I''m very smart."


    "What, that''s..." Tanya trailed off. If she was being honest yeah, yeah she kinda did think Jenny was a little, well, dumb. She hadn''t exactly put it into words in her head yet, but now that Jenny said it it was hard to deny. "Jenny, look..."


    "No it''s okay," Jenny said. "I just wanted to bring it up because I need you to listen to me, right now. And I need you to not dismiss me or ignore me, I need you to understand I''m making sense and I know what I''m talking about."


    "Oh...okay..."


    "We''re going the wrong way." Jenny pointed behind them and to the left at an angle. "Kyle is that way. A little above us."


    "How do you... because you''re a genie. You''re both connected to each other! Of COURSE you know which way he is, the same way you did back at the forest!"


    "So let''s go see if we can find a way out that way!" Jenny started marching, Tanya following behind.


    "Yeah. Yeah. Jenny, wait a sec..."


    "No time!" Jenny said, coming up short. "Well the good news is I think I found the right way."


    "And the bad news is whatever we''re dealing with is actually trying to stop us now," Tanya finished for her, as teddy bears with glowing red eyes floated into the air all around them.

 Chapter 96: Grin and bear it

    Getting attacked by flying teddy bears was perhaps the ultimate surreal experience. Because while the teddy bears were definitely creepy, with the ambience of an old and dessicated haunted house, they were also made of fabric and stuffed with fluff. So they rose eerily into the air, filled with malice, flew towards Jenny and Tania with wicked intent...and bounced off.


    The only real problem was that there were hundreds of them. It was like walking through a creepy, cuddly snowstorm.


    "This is more annoying than anything," Jenny said, pushing her way through the cloud of teddy bears.


    "It''s trying to disorient us," Tanya smacked another flying teddy bear away. "If we were using normal senses to get through this instead of your soul connection to Kyle, we''d definitely be turned around right now."


    "Still this feels a little weak."


    "Right. There''s got to be a trick here. It''s...woah!"


    There was a sudden flare of power and Tanya conjured a thick piece of bark over her skin, just over her kidney. It shattered as a pair of rusty scissors bounced off it.


    "There''s blades mixed in!" Tanya called out.


    "Ohhh that makes a lot of sense."


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    Their progress slowed, as they stopped every so often to block a blade streaking through the cloud of distracting bears.


    Then it slowed again.


    And again.


    "Why am I getting so tired?" Jenny panted, sagging to her knees. She batted a blade away with a bolt of magic.


    "I don''t know," Tanya sagged beside her. "But it''s happening to me too."


    She snatched one of the teddy bears out of the air and held it. It failed and struggled in her grip.


    "It''s because these damn teddy bears aren''t just a distraction," she panted. "This thing is literally draining the life out of me. It''s not much, but so many of them bouncing off of us over and over again is adding up."


    "I KNEW gently slapping us with teddy bears wasn''t dangerous enough for this spooky house!" Jenny said. "Get close to me."


    They shuffled together under the onslaught of teddy bears and rusty blades and Jenny clapped her hands together, creating a burst of power that blew bears and blades alike away from them, creating a cleared out space. It was only for a moment, but it gave Tanya enough time to create a dome of energy to keep the flying bears off of them.


    "We can''t keep this up for long," Tanya said. "It''s not draining power as fast when they bump into the shield, but it''s still draining power. Even if you put your own power into the shield, it''s gonna wear out eventually."


    "I''m pretty weak now," Jenny stretched her arms. "But maybe we just start blasting?"


    "They''ll just spread out and swing back at us. Like a school of fish. But hold that thought. We might get our chance, depending on what we''re up against. Give it a minute, and get ready to blast when I tell you."


    It wasn''t too much longer before the onslaught changed. The bears and blades pulled away, clumping together and forming into a huge shape. They molded and shifted together until, towering over their dome shield, was an enormous teddy bear with bladed claws. It raised a hand to crush the shield.


    "Blast her now!" Tanya said, dropping the shield. Jenny obliged, firing a huge explosion of magician energy that slammed into the enormous teddy bear, bursting it into a cloud of burned fuzz and singed fabric.


    "Got it!" Jenny panted, collapsing.


    "Yeah," Tanya sagged. "Looks like we''re alright."


    "How did you know it would do that?"


    "Total guess. But now we know a few things. For one thing, it''s got a personality. If it was a mindless force, it wouldn''t have gotten impatient. For another thing, it was still smart enough to play us."


    "But we beat it!" Jenny said.


    "Yes. But it didn''t use any of the power it drained to attack us. Which means..."


    "It''s using the power somewhere else!" Jenny said, her eyes going wide. She turned and ran in the direction of Kyle''s energy.

 Chapter 97: Realization of

    A lot of strange things had happened to Kyle since he''d stumbled across the lamp. He''d become a magical warrior. He''d fought demons and monsters and elves. He''d flown across the sky on a giant duck. His girlfriend was a genie and, if he was being honest, that thought was still a little less weird to him than having a girlfriend in the first place.


    But as the enraged end table charged him spitting snarking shrieking ceramic tchotchkes at him, he wondered if this was the weirdest thing.


    All of a sudden the furniture had just turned hostile. And STRONG. Strong enough to give him problems and, and this felt weird to say too, he wasn''t weak. He thought he had a pretty decent measure of where he stood, compared to the people he''d fought before, and he''d guess he was on the top third of the chart. There were probably a lot of people stronger than the chart out there still, like Sylvanandra''s boss, but he didn''t think he could be called weak anymore.


    And he wasn''t going to start losing to discount furniture. Even if it was being weirdly obstinate. He FINALLY managed to put his fist through it, reducing it to splinters.


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    "That was my great grandmother''s," Abby said. Kyle whirled around to stare at her. "Oh no, no! I''m not really complaining this is just pretty weird."


    "Yeah no argument there," Kyle sighed. "Come on, I sense Jenny in that direction."


    "So you can sense where each other are all the time?"


    "It''s more like a general direction, but yeah."


    "Because she''s a genie and you''re her... master?"


    "Don''t say it like that."


    "Like what?"


    "Don''t lie to me, you did that on purpose."


    "Maybe a little. But listen, what can she do for you?"


    "Listen, when Jenny did this it was cute because it was a translation error, but now you''re just..."


    "No! Not like that I mean if we get to her can you just wish us out of here?"


    "What? Oh, no. Wishes don''t work like that. I''ve already made my wishes. In fact I just found out when you make a wish it summons..."


    Kyle stopped in the middle of the hall. There were other answers. Ones he could think of, and there were a lot of things about magic he didn''t know so there were probably lots more. But SOMETHING had suddenly given the thing in the house a lot more power out of nowhere...


    And besides, it felt right. He was sure of it the same way he was sure what direction Jenny was in.


    "Wish God!" He shouted into the endless hallway. "Wish god... professor whatever name you were using, I don''t remember! Get out here! I know you''re here someplace!"


    "What are you shouting about?" Abby looked confused.


    "I''m starting to think some of this may be partly indirectly my fault," Kyle explained.


    "How is it...."


    Before she could answer there was a rumbling noise, and from down the hallway the carpet flowed towards them like a tidal wave.

 Chapter 98: Different View

    The thing inhabiting the house was not human. It did not think and act like humans do. But it did think, so please accept these loose translations.


    "What the hell!?" It screamed into the void. "Why won''t this human die?"


    The answer, of course, was that Kyle was significantly more reinforced than any mortal the force has ever encountered before. Still, it was having a great deal of trouble accepting it. No human had ever been this durable before. And he was annoyingly good at protecting the ordinary mortal.This story has been taken without authorization. Report any sightings.


    But then, possibly in that thought there was also the answer. The truth was it wasn''t very enthusiastic to kill Abby, it hadn''t been targeting her and had focused mostly on the powerful mortal. But possibly...


    It gathered all the power it could in one place and struck straight for Abby. It would be sad if it hit her, but...


    It had no face. It could not smile. But it felt a deep sense of something like satisfaction as Kyle stepped in and took the hit

 Chapter 99: Scream of Rage

    Kyle looked down at his stomach, eyes wide. Huh, that was interesting. It didn''t hurt at all. He''d heard that before, that something like this wouldn''t hurt. Something about shock, or something like that. Wow, huh, he was saying something a lot of times. That probably wasn''t a good sign. Maybe it meant his brain was dying.


    Because there was definitely a huge spike made of...well he wasn''t sure, really. It was covered in the hall carpet, so you''d think it was the wood of the floor it was made of, but that shouldn''t be hard enough anymore. Not to go right through his body like that. And it had DEFINITELY speared him straight through his stomach.


    And it still didn''t hurt. Not even after the tendril pulled out of his stomach and...wow that was a LOT of blood. And bits of him. He fell to his knees, blood gushing out of him. Abby screamed.


    And then...he didn''t die.


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    He felt himself almost die. It was a weird sensation, like losing his balance for a second, as his soul actually tried to leave his body. But then it didn''t, and he fell back against the hall, clutching the hole in his stomach. A hole which was slowly, very slowly, closing up.


    One eternal node, dedicated to healing. As long as he didn''t die instantly, he''d heal forever. Ot had been so long since he was really seriously injured he''d forgotten about it. But it was a SMALL node. He''d heal forever... eventually. And this wound was too much to heal in time for him to help Abby.


    Or protect himself, for that matter. A couple more of those and it could finish him off no problem.


    "Abby..."


    "How the hell are you still alive!?" She shrieked. "How the hell are you still TALKING?"


    "Magic," he said. "That''s not important right now. I''m really, REALLY hard to kill but it''s not impossible. You need to go."


    "And leave you alone?"


    "Love the instincts but I think I''ve got a bead on this thing''s personality. It wasn''t going for you, it''s going for me. And I''m pretty sure still being alive is going to piss it off. So get out of the way, and I''ll handle this."


    "But I can''t just..."


    The house shuddered around them, a soundless scream of rage and frustration reverberating through the walls. Another spike of carpeted floor shot through the air, slamming itself into Kyle''s chest. He coughed up blood.


    Then there was a second scream of rage, this one not soundless at all, as Jenny exploded through the wall.

 Chapter 100: Doesnt that always backfire?

    Jenny spent less than a second taking in the scene. Kyle on the floor, a hole through his stomach. A healing hole, but a hole. Jenny knew Kyle could heal from almost any wound. She had no idea how much it would actually take to kill Kyle, but she also had zero intention of waiting to find out.


    She threw everything she had against the force coming down the hallway, chagrined at the realization it was using a lot of HER power for these assaults. It was able to damage Kyle so much because of the power it had absorbed from her, with its creepy floating teddy bears. And Tanya, of course, but Jenny had a lot more magic to steal than Tanya did.


    Of course Tanya would probably know an actual spell to do something about this, while Jenny was just pouring all the magic she could down the hallway. She could sense it down there, something black and malevolent and lurking. She still couldn''t tell what it was. She was about to ask Tanya, but the sorceress ran right past her.


    "Keep it up Jenny!" She shouted. "I''m going to try something!"


    She ran to Kyle''s side and knelt there. Abby was already there, crying at Kyle''s side. She hadn''t been able to bring herself to go, even though he''d told her to go. Actually she might have been about to run, but Jenny exploding through the wall had kind of upset everybody''s plans.


    "What the hell is going on?" Abby asked, years still streaming down her face.


    "Do you know? I think I actually know." Tanya grabbed Kyle''s hand. "I''ve been think about it and I think I can put an end to this whole mess. But you''ve got to do a lot of the heavy lifting. First, Kyle, you need to heel up faster."This book''s true home is on another platform. Check it out there for the real experience.


    "I can do that?"


    "You''ve done it before. Channel your magic through your eternal node. You''re just really messed up. Do that until I can''t actually see the floor through you anymore, then we''ll do the other thing."


    "I can''t keep this up!" Jenny called back.


    "Just a little longer!" Tanya shouted back, gripping Kyle''s hand tighter. "Okay, I think your organs are functioning well enough to try this. I''m going to link my power to yours and I''m going to guide you in casting a spell. I can''t cast it, only you can. Work with me."


    Kyle nodded, and let her guide his power. It was strange to feel her magic flowing along with his. Her power felt like ice cold wriggling vibes, and his every instinct screamed at him to expel it. It was like he could feel someone else''s blood mixing with his, only it could move.


    That was a terrible analogy. He was starting to suspect that his body might have restored his organs, but he was still suffering from significant blood loss. So he turned his focus back to what she was trying to guide him to do. And he realized it wasn''t just him she was guiding. The power was flowing through Jenny. It felt familiar. He''d known nothing about magic before, but it was almost like..."


    "This is a wish," Kyle rasped, his voice thick.


    "Sort of," Tanya said. "I know Jenny talked to you about it. It''s a spell to sort of simulate a wish a sorcerer who''s got a genie bound to them can cast."


    "I thought you said you couldn''t get any more wishes," Abby said.


    "I thought the wish cheating spell always backfires," Kyle chimed in.


    "Real ones don''t, yes this spell usually does, but that''s because the genie fights it and messes with it. Nobody''s been as close to their genie as you in recorded history, and Jenny is made of niceness and kittens. I''m taking a chance."


    "What do I wish for?"


    "Nothing. This is a terrible version of an unreliable spell. We''re just giving Jenny access to wish level power for a split second."


    "Hurry up please!" Jenny called back. "I''m almost out of power and the stabby carpet is getting closer!"


    "Okay ready?" Tanya said. "If I''m right about everything, things are gonna get a little weird."


    Before Kyle could ask what she meant, the spell completed and the world went white.

 Chapter 101: She said it would get weird

    Kyle found himself standing on a vast, empty expanse of white. And endless plain of silent nothingness. Silent, except for a child''s laughter.


    "Well that''s creepy as all hell," Kyle grumbled, looking around. Finding no landmarks he looked down at himself, and found himself completely healed. Healed, and his shirt entirely intact.


    "Oh," he said to no one in particular. "I''m not actually here. This is a mind magic something or other."


    He was betting that was the technical term for it anyway. This was some kind of weird dream space or something that they''d all wound up trapped in when the wish thing...worked? Tanya said if she was right things were going to get weird, and this was certainly pretty weird. Logically speaking that meant she must have been right.


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    For whatever good that did him. Seriously, could the laughing child bit stop now? Or could he at least see a child?


    The silhouette of a little girl appeared in the distance as if it were running towards him through mist. He couldn''t tell if some of the endless white around him was actually fog, or if the little girl was coming into existence around him. She was bouncing a ball, and looked up at him. She was absolutely adorable.


    He knew that, he was certain she was adorable, despite the fact that she had no face. She was blank like a mannequin, an empty flat expanse framed by hair pulled up in pigtails. The hair kept shifting color, from black to red to brown to blonde. And yet he was still certain she was adorable.


    "Yup. This is pretty weird."


    "Who''s weird?" The little girl said. "You''re the weird one mister."


    "Okay I suppose that''s fair," Kyle scratched his head. "Maybe everybody in wherever we are is like you, and I''m the weird one. Are there other people?"


    "Of course!" The girl laughed. "I live with GXCBVV and VVVVVTX!"


    Kyle stared at her for a long moment.


    "What?"


    "QQQQQQQQQQQQ is gonna call me for dinner soon. I gotta go mister!"


    She turned and ran off, disappearing into the mist. With no idea of what else he should do, Kyle went to follow her.


    He picked up the pace when he heard the little girl scream.

 Chapter 102: What Happened to the Little Girl

    Kyle ran into the whiteness until it started to fade away around him. Like tog rolling away he found himself in a burning house. The little girl was kneeling on the ground, next to an equally faceless couple who lay dead on the ground, gaping wounds weeping crimson blood. Standing over them was a man, faceless safe for his cruel, wild grin. He reached for the little girl...


    Kyle couldn''t stand back and watch that, as little as he understood what was going on. He ran in and punched for the grinning figure with all his weight. The moment his fist made contact the world around him exploded onto glowing swirls, like inky water when a rock is thrown into it. When the swirls calmed, the scene had changed.


    They were on a road now. On a stormy night. The scene was similar, dead parents, crying girl, although now there was a great mob of grinning shadows, a cruel gang. Still acting on instinct, Kyle waded into the mob, but as soon as he touched them the world swirled and changed around him.


    This established a pattern.


    A warzone. A cabin in the woods. A dark city street. Sometimes there was one killer, sometimes dozens. The parents were always there but they changed with each new scenario. Sometimes there were siblings, lying dead alongside the parents.


    An office. A campsite. A ship at sea. And airplane. The world around them had become a long stretch of desert robe, a grinning killer in a sherrifs hat towering over the family now, when Kyle reached out to the only constant within all the changes.The story has been taken without consent; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.


    "Stop," he said, firmly but kindly, putting his hand on the little girl''s shoulder.


    "I''m just trying to show you," the little girl said.


    "But you don''t know what to show me," he said. "Do you?"


    "No," the little girl said, in a quiet whisper. "I remember being hurt. Parents...they died. And someone evil. But I don''t remember what happened. I was lost for so long. Wandering...and then I found here. This house. There''s something about it that''s familiar.


    "Why did you start hurting people?"


    "You came here to hurt me!"


    "Well that wasn''t really what we meant, but I can see how you could think that. I mean the other people. The ones who came here."


    "They...reminded me," she said. "There was one, the shape of his ears, it reminded me of being hurt. Another one''s shirt..."


    "Bits and pieces," Tanya said, wandering out of the mists. "She''s a kind of ghost called a wandering grudge. She''s not actually the spirit of the little girl, not really. She''s a memory. Of hurt and pain and something horrible. Only emotion. That''s why she doesn''t actually know what happened. But she''s got enough memory to find a house similar to the one the little girl loved in. And to attack someone who, say, had the same shaped ears as someone the little girl saw the day whatever it was happened."


    "Oh," Kyle said. "But you can''t keep hurting people. Whatever happened...it was a long time ago. Far away from here. You understand that right?"


    "I suppose," the little girl said. "I...I could stop."


    The mist around them began to bubble with dark mists.


    "Kyle? Get ready to fight," Tanya said.


    "What? She''s not going to..."


    "Not her," Tanya said. "A wandering grudge can''t normally kill people. It''s a nuisance. The guy with the ears should have tripped down stairs, or gotten a cut. Maybe felt sick while he was in the house. It''s not powerful enough to erase people completely, not on its own."


    A shape began to move in the mists.


    "There''s something else in here."

 Chapter 103: The thing were fighting

    Kyle stared at...


    Well he didn''t know what it was, exactly. A great dark looming shape, bubbling clouds of darkness, something... something horrible.


    "What the hell is it?"


    "Something old," Tanya shrugged. "There are a lot of things like that, really, floating around in the places between worlds. It''s not usually our problem because unless they''re a lot more powerful than that one is, they can''t get into our world. Unless they can latch on to something."


    "The wandering grudge," Kyle said. "I get it. It used the grudge to come into our world somehow."This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road. If you spot it on Amazon, please report it.


    "And it''s inherently malicious. The grudge just gave it targets," Tanya explained. "By now, the grudge will have shaped some of its own nature, too. It''s not the same creature from before they collided."


    "Great. So what do we do now? It''s just kind of...sitting there."


    "This part I''m not actually very sure about," Tanya said. "We can still use our powers here, I think mostly. But I''m not sure how to fight it like that. Or what it''s waiting for."


    "Huh." Kyle looked up at the swirling black morass. "Well you said it would get weird. Wait, where''s Jenny? It feels like she should be right here."


    "Unconscious," Tanya said.


    "I kinda thought we were unconscious. Like this was a dream."


    "No we''re just asleep. Jenny is... spent. You''d feel it if she was hurt, but she''s too drained from the wish spell to be. But you''re right, our bodies aren''t actually here."


    "But I assume we can still die."


    "Of course. Magic isn''t a video game. You can usually die."


    "But what do we do about this?"


    "It''s probably trying to decide the same thing. It can''t kill us as a big billowing ball of smoke. It needs..."


    A shape began to appear out of the smoke.


    "...a body. Oh, crap, this is a problem."


    In a cloud of smile, her eyes dark and cruel, strode Abby, at the center of the cloud.

 Interlude: Sick

    Betty was not having a good time.


    Some kind of flu or head cold had hit her hard, harder than hard, and she was now curled up under covers feeling sorry for herself. There was a soft padding on the floor beside her, and she turned her head to see her cat.This book was originally published on Royal Road. Check it out there for the real experience.


    Her five elements cat. A creature of strange and ancient power. Could it possibly possess some secret spell to battle her illness?


    The cat hopped up on her chest and fell asleep l


    "Oh well," she sighed. "Regular cat magic is good too."

 No chapter this week

    I''ve done chapters in the aftermath of hurricanes, I''ve managed interludes while deathly sick, rough as they may have been I''ve gotten a chapter of some kind out every week come literal hell or high water. But this morning, out of almost nowhere my cat passed away, and I learned that there really is a mood and situation I just can''t write in. Thanks everybody for reading.Unauthorized usage: this tale is on Amazon without the author''s consent. Report any sightings.


    EDIT: Oh god that made it sound like I was ending the story! Nononono I''m just taking the week off, see everybody next week.


    And goodbye Holiday. I already miss you more than I can believe.

 Chapter 104: Fighting a Friend

    Kyle stared at Abby''s body.


    No, wait, that came out wrong. Why did he always seem to think about nonsense in the middle of stressful situations? He was faced with an enemy unlike anything he''d faced before, inhabiting the body of a friend. Well someone he knew, anyway. They''d only known each other for a few days, but one thing he''d learned was that monster attacks had a way of speeding up friendships.


    "Well we can fight her now," Tanya said, chewing her thumbnails. "But anything we do to her body will...wow this sounds wrong. If we hurt her she actually gets hurt."


    "I''ve figured that out already," Kyle sighed. "I''m still trying to figure out what to do. I''ve never had to fight a friend before."


    "What are you talking about?" The thing in Abby''s body cocked their head curiously. Her voice was like a chorus of buzzing flies trying to sing in a church choir. "They''ve tried to kill you seven or eight times."


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    "What?" Kyle blinked. "I don''t... WHO''S tried to kill me seven or eight times? I don''t think any individual thing we''ve fought has tried to kill me that many times."


    The creature in Abby''s body paused.


    "Oh," it finally said. "The future. Time is so strange in your realm, in its straight little lines. Sometimes when a future is very strong I can get mixed up. How interesting. It means you haven''t fought in the tournament yet. You haven''t even faced the dragon. And that means you haven''t built your greatest weapon yet. You are far less dangerous than I thought."


    "We''re dangerous enough," Tanya said.


    "Not to me," the thing insisted. "Not here. Not in the realm of dreams and ideas. I am an idea, you merely have them. You don''t belong in this place. You''re wrapping yourself up in shares you recognize. I can only speak with you because I am inhabiting the shell of one of you."


    "But why?" Kyle asked. "Why do you want to kill people at all?"


    It cocked Abby''s head and stared at him.


    "Well!?" Kyle demanded.


    "Don''t bother," Tanya shook her head. "It doesn''t understand the question. The idea that it might not kill people would never occur to it."


    "But I do not have to kill you," the thing said. "We find ourselves stalemated, for now. I could possibly kill you, but doing so would harm me. You could possibly kill me, in this body, but that would harm your friend. And I would also not like harm to come to Abby, if it can be avoided. She reminds me....of a girl. In the memories of the wandering grudge.


    "So let us both lose. I will leave this house, take the grudge with me, find a new home. I won''t be your problem anymore. And you will leave me alone to continue my existence in peace. I will..."


    Kyle shot forward and put his hand through Abby''s chest.

 Chapter 105: I dont understand gods

    This turned out to be a mistake.


    Oh, not because he''d killed Abby. He hadn''t. He''d guessed right, from the way everybody was talking. This place was a dream, after all. A dream where they could die, maybe, but a dream was still a dream. The only thing that was all the way real here, the way Kyle saw it, was the thing they were fighting. So if he really, really focused, just on that, he could probably grab the thing inside her without hurting Abby.


    Right? That made sense.


    He could already hear Tanya yelling at him.


    But it actually worked! His hand passed right through her chest and gripped the eerie swirling thing inside of her. His hand closed on it, ready to pull it from her, free them so they could...


    Be back where they started, he supposed, without a way to kill or be killed by the deranged dream creature. But freeing Abby was important and...


    The thing felt terrible in his fingers. Like he was grabbing nothing that was covered in slime that hated him. It wiggled impossibly in his grip and then, as it tugged in his hands, he was pulled somewhere else. Like he''d been pulled deeper into another dream, inside another dream, spiraling down.


    He was fighting someone. Someone he knew. He could feel the hate from the fight, but he couldn''t tell if it was him or his opponent.If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, it''s taken without the author''s consent. Report it.


    A wedding. His. The bride was Jenny, but the scene kept changing, and the room was filled with love but at the corner of his eyes flickered fire and death.


    He stood in an arena, ringed in brass and gold, waiting to see who his opponent would be.


    The dragon. The dragon. The dragon. It was huge. No, it was...close? It tore through everything, it tore the world to pieces, and when they fell back together the shape was different...


    And then he was in darkness, with the beautiful female form of the Wish God.


    "Where are we?" He asked.


    "You do not want to answer to that question," the wish God said. "Let''s just leave it at someplace else, alright? Just...outside."


    "Outside of what?"


    "Once again, you do not want..."


    "Yeah yeah I don''t want to know. I knew you were behind this."


    "Well I mean, technically we''ve never met. I''m a piece of the wish gods power she granted to the wandering grudge and the DKRKKKKKKYYYKKKKK."


    "Should...should I be learning to pronounce that, or..."


    "No that was just random screeching caused by me attempting to pronounce syllables incompatible with the laws of physics vs experienced by your reality. But yes, I boosted the presences inside this house quite a bit."


    "We almost died! We could still almost die!"


    "Oh I wouldn''t worry about that. The thing you were fighting is EXTREMELY dead. You crashed through here like a lead ball through damp paper. Your realities really are NOT supposed to mix. That goes both ways. No, it all worked out...mostly how I expected. It got kind of improvisational there but mostly we''re still on track!"


    "With my wish."


    "Yes."


    "And all that stuff I saw falling in here?"


    "The future. Likely futures. But you knew that."


    "I wish I had more details."


    "Never good to have more details about the future. You''ll just drive yourself crazy and everything gets messed up anyway."


    "But the dragon is next. The dragon is SOON."


    "Oh, yeah, definitely. No question. The chain of events leading to the dragon is already started, you''re going to have to deal with that."


    "Which means you think I can get out of here." Kyle looked around the endless void. "I was worried."


    "Oh, of course you can!" She said. "That''s my last job as a fragment of the wish god''s power. I''ll get to cease to exist before the rest of me. I''m looking forward to it!"


    She waves goodbye, crumbling to dust as Kyle felt himself returning to reality.


    "I don''t get gods."

 Chapter 106: The Morning After

    The morning after is always terrible.


    The morning after what doesn''t really matter. Whether it was a night of stress, and pain, and terror or a night of love and warmth, or even just lust and debauchery. Come the morning after any significant event there will be consequences, and waking up marks the moment those consequences will have to be dealt with.


    Kyle and the others woke up with consequences standing over them, holding groceries.


    "WHAT is going on here?" Demanded the matronly woman who''d found them asleep in the hallway. The very normal hallway, in a no longer demonically possessed house. For a moment Kyle wondered if Abby had somehow aged twenty years, then it clicked that this must be Abby''s mother. In his defense, his brain had been swizzled. Not as much as Abby''s had, though she didn''t show it. Much. Reading on this site? This novel is published elsewhere. Support the author by seeking out the original.


    "Oh hey mom, we were just...yeah."


    "Are you high?" The older woman demanded. "Are there drugs? And was that BLOOD all over the entryway!?"


    "No, mom, I''m not high," Abby said. "It''s, uh, wow. Explaining things is hard."


    "Can you do a memory erasing spell or something?" Kyle hissed to Tanya.


    "No, those are really complicated," Tanya said. "Quick, convince her this was a party that got out of control!"


    "What''s going on?" Jenny asked, suddenly jerking awake. "Is the hallway still attacking!?"


    It took...A WHILE to convince Abby''s mother there wasn''t any drugs after that. And then a little longer to convince her this wasn''t an orgy, though to be fair she seemed more abused about the p


    rospect of an orgy.

 Chapter 107: An Unwelcome Voice

    That same night, Ammeline took some time to herself. Or at least, it was SUPPOSED to be for herself. She walked out into the yard, again, sitting on the same bench she''d been sitting on when she''d become queen of the fairies. Everyone seemed to think the flowers growing out of her hair were a fashion choice. As far as she could tell, they were a part of her. This was... frustrating. And something she was going to have to deal with eventually. There had to be some way to get them under control.


    But that might, while the others investigated the new girls haunted house, she was just looking to relax. Which shed found a lot easier to do out in nature, ever since she became queen of the fairies. Stupid fairie magic. But whatever it took to relax. Do she sat down, leaned back, closed her eyes, and let out a long, slow breath.


    "Deeg!"


    Ammeline didn''t move.


    "Deeg deeg!"


    "Look," she said, her eyes remaining firmly closed, "whatever you are. I know I''m your queen, or whatever, but this is human time. Me time. I left very able officials and one moderately deranged octopus in charge. I''m more of a mystical figurehead. So go bring it up with the shadowy conspiracy behind the throne and leave me in peace."


    "Deeg! Deeg! Deeg! Deeg! Deeg! Deeg! Deeg!"


    She opened her eyes.


    "I feel like I ought to make some kind of comment here, but at this point I can''t even be surprised."


    Crowding around her feet were about a hundred little bushes wearing pointy hats. They moved in a jittering, twittering clump, and they didn''t seem to like when they weren''t touching at least one other of the crowd. It happened sometimes, in their milling around, but the loose one always hurried and clumped up with the others.


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    "So you guys are...gnomes?" She guessed.


    "Deeg!" One of them chirped angrily.


    "Right. And I''m not going to fall into a comedy bit where I try to repeat that noise you guys are making and accidentally offend you or whatever. So forget what you are, what do you want?"


    "Deeg!" "Deeg!" "Deeg!" "Deeg!"


    "Well that was predictable. Okay so... charades?"


    "Deeg! Deeg! Deeg! Deeg! Deeg..."


    "They''re shrub sprites."


    Ammeline jerked up at the unwelcome voice, reaching for her sword. She never let it get far away from her these days, just in case, you know, someone who''d tried to kill her once showed up.


    "Oh relax I''m not here to fight. I''m still depowered, anyway. You''d poke me full of holes in seconds."


    Sylvanandra walked out of the shadows of the trees. The little creatures, shrub sprites apparently, shifted to the other side of Ammeline and hid behind her, peeking nervously at the eleven sorceress.


    "They still don''t seem to like you," Ammeline said. "So far what I know about Shrub Sprites is that they have excellent taste."


    "Hilarious. They''re just reacting to how different my nature magic is from theirs. But at least I can talk to them."


    The eleven sorceress raised an eyebrow, and there was a feeling of... something. The shrub sprites bristled, then started chirping a chorus of angry "Deeg!"-ing.


    "You can speak their language and you used it to insult them?"


    "I just said the first thing that came to mind. And it''s not a language, it''s deeper communication than that. Wanna know how I did it?"


    "Obviously! But why would I want you to teach me?"


    "Because despite the Myrdin girl using nature magic, she''s using a different kind. Hers is all growth and control. She''s not actually a PART of the Green Weave, like we are."


    "Ahahahahahaha!" Ammeline scoffed dismissively. "You want me to...."


    "And now you''re trying to act all arrogant to cover for not knowing what the Green Weave is."


    Ammeline shut her mouth and glared.


    "I can make an educated guess."


    "How educated?" Sylvanandra pressed. "If I were to say the word Sh''kha''rem...nope, sorry, that''s what it is in elvish, that''s cheating, what''s the human for it... mycorrhizal network, there we go, you''d have any idea what I was talking about?"


    Ammeline glared more.


    "Deeg!"


    "Stop helping," Ammeline hissed. "Alright. What do you want in exchange for teaching me?"


    "We can discuss that...later," Sylvanandra said with a sly smile.


    "That''s it!" Ammeline grabbed her sword.


    "I''m bored okay!" Sylvanandra held up her hands in surrender. "I''m not allowed to do any evil schemes and I''ve barely got any magic! Teaching you to talk like a plant is the most interesting thing to do around here! Geeze you try to kill somebody one, two...okay it was THREE times unless you count it all as one one incident but still aggro much?"


    Ammeline paused, still gripping her sword.


    "Alright fine. Where do we start?"

 Chapter 108: Probably not important, right?

    Sylvanandra sat down on the bench and gestured for Ammeline to do the same. Ammeline hesitate, hand still hovering near the sword.


    "Come on, you''re the one who asked me to teach you. It''s not like we''re gonna make out."


    Ammeline moved her hand away from her sword.


    "Yet."


    "You are beginning to strain my patience."


    "Sit. If you''re going to learn this we need to be touching each other. No, that''s not a joke. Give me your hands."


    Reluctantly, Ammeline sat down and Sylvanandra took her hands. The shrub sprites clustered around Ammeline''s ankles, deeging and bristling.


    "Alright so the first thing you need to understand is that you''re part plant now."


    Ammeline tried to look up at her own head, and at the plants now growing from her hair. She couldn''t, of course, but she swore sometimes she could look out THROUGH them.


    "That part isn''t very hard."


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    "Alright then the next thing you need to understand is that plants are a lot more connected than animals are. On a basic, fundamental level. Just look at all the grass around here." She gestured to the sprawling lawn. "The lawn here is made up of thousands of plants, but they''re mostly underground. What you''re looking at is the leaves sticking up above the dirt. And those root systems are in contact, pressed together like that.


    "But beyond that. There''s fungus in the ground connecting the roots of plants together. Trees in the forest can use them to communicate with each other. That''s how plants communicate. With thoughts and sensations. It''s less like a human conversation, and more like the way your hand tells your brain you''re touching a sexy elf."


    "Ignoring that last part, I don''t have roots. And I''m not connected to fungus, except for now when we''re holding hands."


    "Ouch. You''re a nature fairy now, you should have more respect for fungus. But no, you don''t have roots. Except magically speaking, actually, you do. Plant magic is just as tangled up as plants themselves are. And you''re a part of it. So try to communicate with me that way. We''re actually in physical contact, it should be easier."


    "You haven''t actually told me how to do that."


    "It''s intuitive more than anything. You''re the one getting in your own way, so...stop. Stop thinking like an animal."


    Ammeline closed her eyes and concentrated...but that felt wrong. So she stopped concentrating and just kind of...let go. Into the feeling of the plants growing out of her head, into that sense of...whatever...she''d felt when Sylvanandra had insulted the brush sprites.


    There wasn''t some big moment of realization. It was more like when you finally noticed a sound you''ve been hearing for hours. She could feel Sylvanandra. She could feel Sylvanandra actually kind of wanting to make out, but she pushed that thought aside and focused on....


    Everything. She could feel the grass. The shrub sprites. The trees. Plants going out and out and out and...


    "Hey! Pull it back!" Sylvanandra warned. "You can get lost in something like this and turn into a tree."


    "Oh right!" Ammeline opened her eyes. "I should have expected something like that. Did you sense somebody made of plants back near the school too?"


    "There''s magical bitches all over the place. But now you should be able to talk to the shrub sprites. Unless you wanna make out."


    Ignoring her, Ammeline turned to the shrub sprites.


    "Hello! Can you understand me now?" She...well we''re going to go with said but it was really more like "felt" towards the brush sprites.


    "Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!"


    "Good! So what was it you needed help with?"


    "There''s a huge dragon!"


    Ammeline put her head in her hands.


    "I told you we should have made out," Sylvanandra sighed.

 Chapter 109: Dragon

    Ammeline rubbed her temples.


    "Right," she said out loud, in ordinary human language. "A dragon. Well isn''t that something I, as a modern American princess, should be dealing with? Ahahaha! I''ve got nature magic and a sword, I''m sure I can handle it!"


    "Nature magic you have no idea what you''re doing with," Sylvanandra pointed out. "And you''re good with that weird, no question, but how many fencing swords have beaten dragons, historically? Oh, and if you think about it, in most of those stories the princess isn''t exactly the one who deals with the dragon, exactly. Unless it''s some kind of porno, which brings me back to making out..."


    "Why are you so obsessed with that?" Ammeline glared at her.


    "You and your friends are hot, you''re the only one I think I have a chance with, and I''m REALLY bored."


    "Thank you for your honesty, but I''m not interested. Besides..."


    "Not interested in girls, or not interested in me? It affects my choices going forward."


    "BESIDES, I did specify I was a modern American princess." Obviously feeling herself now, ammeline stood and held up her blade. The shrub sprites "deeged" appreciatively. "I''m not a noble who''s spent her whole life waiting to get married off to a viscount, I''m going to be president someday and I have a sword! Ahahahahahaha!"


    "That could be your campaign slogan."


    "I can at least go and investigate."


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    "Vote for Ammeline Trent, I Have A Sword!"


    "And once I''ve investigated, I won''t be stupid about it about it. If it looks like something I can''t deal with, I''ll get the others. I don''t have an awful lot to compare it to, but you''re always going on about how powerful you are right? And we beat you. We must be fairly powerful then."


    "Yeah but that might not mean anything when we''re talking about a dragon. Dragons aren''t just powerful, they''re crazy. But I wouldn''t worry too much about it, because it''s probably not really a dragon."


    "What do you mean?"


    "Nobody''s seen an active dragon in like two thousand years. The Uzbedis spend a LOT of time keeping up spells that make sure they stay dormant. And this is one place where everybody helps them. A dragon is like a hurricane that can hate you, specifically. That''s not trouble anybody wants."


    "So they''re just wild monsters?"


    "No, they''re intelligent but they''re mostly assholes. The few who can get along with anyone else stay quiet and out of everybody''s way. So chances are, there isn''t a dragon."


    "You think there''s something else. That looks like a dragon to my little subjects here."


    "Right. A big lizard, or even some kind of hostile bird. Shrub sprites aren''t known for being very smart. But be careful. There''s a lot of magic around here lately, and you''re right next to a portal to the fairy realms. It COULD still be something dangerous."


    "Well then my plan still stands. Lead on, my subjects, and I''ll see what''s to be done about this dragon!"


    This last was, of course, said in the plant communication. Calling it "speech" didn''t seem right. The shrub sprites "Deeged!" Happily and left them into the forest. They followed them through long, winding paths, eventually to a cave.


    "It doesn''t feel like there''s enough space for all this forest between my property and the next," Ammeline pointed out.


    "That''s because it''s an extra dimensional space. There''s more surface of the earth than there is surface area. A lot of magical locations exist sort of...stacked on top of reality like that. High levels of magic naturally warp space."


    "And I just happened to wind up living next to a magic forest?" Ammeline shook her head. "That''s a big coincidence."


    "What are you talking about? Every forest is like that. Humans used to know that. Haven''t you ever taken a long walk in the woods? You can feel it."


    The two of them followed the scrub sprites into the cave, down and down, until they reached an enormous cavern.


    "Oh," Sylvanandra said.


    "Ahahahahahaha...this.. presents a problem."


    "Dragon!" The scrub sprites called. "Dragon! Dragon! Dragon! Dragon! Dragon!"


    The thing was big enough to fill the college campus by itself. Covered from the tip of its about to the tip of its tail in dark purple scales, so dark they were almost black. It was curled up, and deep asleep, but it''s snores were eruptions of heated air that made the cave uncomfortably warm.


    "Yes," Sylvanandra said. "Yes it is."


    She clapped Ammeline on the shoulder.


    "Well, your majesty, good luck with that."

 Interlude: Take a breath for a moment

    There is, not too put too fine a point on it, a lot going on.


    Even the people in town can feel it, all around them. And not just the exposure to all the magic they''ve been feeling lately, though that is having an effect. In nervous feelings, and half seen things out of the corner of their eye. Those with greater connections to magic found themselves confronted with things they couldn''t explain, or sometimes even manifesting strange powers.


    But it was more than just the magic rising. All the chaos and confusion was having rippling effects, like a fistful of stones thrown into a pond, ripples in the water radiating out, colliding, blending, creating new patterns. Everyone was aware of it, even if they didn''t realize it. Something was happening beneath the surface of the world.


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    A human girl had become a fairy queen. Stone.


    An elven sorceress had come to visit, and spy. Stone.


    An assassin had been sent by foreign powers. Stone.


    A goddess of wishes was meddling in her charge''s life. Stone.


    Hidden forces sought to contain or control the last known genie. Stone.


    A dragon had been found asleep in hidden caverns beneath the temple. Stone.


    But even a fistful of stones needs a hand to throw it in the water. A fire, to reverse the metaphor entirely, needs a spark to light the tinder. And in all the things going on, the spark which would ignite the flame had been all but forgotten, even by those who had sent her.


    It started with a girl made of wood.

 Chapter 110: The Wooden Girl

    She didn''t look like she was made of wood. Not right now. It was part of what she''d been built for. She was a spy golem. A robot, really, though the people who built her despised using such modern mechanical terms. Blank sections of smooth carved wood over glowing green magical circuitry of wheels sliding between and within wheels. She had been built for one purpose, to infiltrate and deceive. She could look like anyone, shrouding herself in illusions.


    Right now she looked like no one in particular, a random student walking down the hall. She was there to spy, although there was so much magical going on she wasn''t exactly sure what was most important. She had, of course, no idea that she would be the flashpoint for the world shattering events that were to follow. She was just trying to get to class. The one with that professor who gave off mildly deific energy. And almost genie magic?


    She actually wasn''t supposed to have ideas at all. It hadn''t yet occurred to her that her thinking was quite a bit more complex than a golem''s was supposed to be, and if the people controlling her had cared enough that they might notice they probably wouldn''t have either. After all, she was supposed to mimic human responses. That was the whole point.


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    "Excuse me," she said absent mindedly to a student she nearly bumped into in the hall, this altering the fate of the world forever. She didn''t even notice she''d done it, although she did spare a brief thought to wonder why the student looked so shocked.


    She moved through the crowd, putting the incident out of her mind. It took a few moments for her to realize she was being followed by the girl she''d just almost bumped into.


    "Wait!" She called out. "Hey! You!"


    The wooden girl had no idea why someone would follow her like that. What had happened? She should feel human too...no, her stealth was perfect. Did they want to start a fight? Her behavior analysis programming said such things could happen. And since fighting, win or lose, would bring nothing but problems she hurried away. Luckily, her pursuer was having a lot of trouble making it through the crowd. She was almost at class, sure she''d escaped, when the girl came out of nowhere and grabbed her arm.


    "Wait!" The girl said, desperate, frantic, panting with exertion. Not a fight then, so what...


    "What do you..." She began, but the girl cut her off.


    "My name''s Valerie!" The girl said rapidly. "And...and you can see me!?"

 Chapter 111: Catalyst

    The wooden girl froze, staring at Valerie.


    The girl had been using a stealth spell of some kind? What kind? Why? Why would someone be walking down the hallway hiding themselves? What would be the point!?


    "Oh my god you can see me that''s SO amazing!" Valerie said. "Are...are you human? I''m sorry that might be kind of a weird question but you''ve got to be magical right? Only magical people can see me. And even then, NOBODY''S been able to JUST see me! I had to pester Kyle for HOURS before he could see me!"


    The wooden girl had completely frozen up, even as more mechanical parts of her psyche analyzed her situation. "Been able," she said. It wasn''t a spell, it was an affliction. Possibly a curse.


    "You have to come with me!"


    Valerie grabbed her arm and pulled. The wooden girl made sure the spells that caused her to feel like flesh we''re still intact and tried to pull away without using too much of her strength. She could be powerful enough to rip the school in half, if she needed to be, but she needed for now to still appear like a normal human.


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    "Come on!" Valerie said excitedly. "I know, I know, I just wanna talk a little it''s been so crazy! Come on!"


    Valerie tugged the wooden girl along. Finally, when they''d found a quiet, out of the way hallway, the wooden girl pulled a little extra strength and forced them to stop. A plan had formulated in her mind.


    "Wait!" She said. "Hold on! I don''t understand what''s going on! Stop for a second and talk to me!"


    "Oh! Right, right, okay." Valerie blushed. "I got a little overexcited."


    "It''s okay," the wooden girl said. "Just explain to me what''s going on."


    "Right," Valerie said. "Okay. Uhm...I''m Valerie. And I''ve got a superpower. No one can see me. Or hear me. More than that, it''s like...like the world tries to erase the fact that I exist. I figure you''ve got powers too, right? So you understand?"


    The wooden girl took a quarter of a second to come up with a response, which was too long. Valerie started talking again.


    "Or maybe you don''t, and it''s just some random thing. Or maybe you do, but you don''t know? Then this must be confusing, but you''ll see when we talk to other people..."


    "I have magic," the wooden girl said.


    "Oh good! So you do get it! Anyway, look, there''s actually a lot of people with magic at this school. Maybe with you helping, and my two other friends, we can find a way to fix me so people can notice me."


    "So right now no one ever notices you''re there?" The wooden girl said slowly. "No matter what you do?"


    "No," Valerie said. "It''s REALLY frustrating. But it''s probably something we can fix, or I can learn to control, but the only ones who can see me don''t know much about magic really. Unless you do, I really don''t know what your thing is..."


    The wooden girl nodded as the overexcited girl prattled on. Then she raised her arm, sprouting a long wicked blade from the end, and plunged it through Valerie''s heart.