《Bullied》


 Chapter 1 – Hopeful

    cause am hopeful


    yes I am, hopeful for today


    BARS AND MELODY- HOPEFUL


    The school bell rang for thest time today. Nobody can understand my anticipation for this hour. It signified the end of my misery.


    Covering my face with my hoodie to hide my ck eye of yesterday, I jumped out of my seat and began my usual race for the door.


    My heart was thumping slowly, yet so loudly that anyone close enough to me would have definitely heard it.


    In my escape, I identally bumped into someone which sent my sses flying off my face.


    Oh great, now I am blind!


    Okay, not blind but no! I have no time for this.


    I crouched to feel the ground for my sses when someone¡¯s voice came into my hearing.


    ¡°Looking for this?¡± The person says and I¡¯m sure it¡¯s a guy because of the baritone nature and that honestly made me fidget.


    Guys in my school don¡¯t necessarily talk to me except in extreme circumstances.


    You don¡¯t want to know the extreme circumstance.


    ¡°Uh¡­ Y-yeah I g-guess.¡± I stuttered as I replied, squinting my eyes to know if I can glimpse who he is.


    I felt a hand touch my face and slip on my sses for me. After much blinking for amodation, a cute brown-haired guy was standing in front of me with his hands in the pocket of his jeans.


    ¡°T-thank you?¡± It came out as more of a question than a statement.


    ¡°You¡¯re wee?¡± He responded with the same tone I used and that kind of made meugh a little.


    I stood rooted and watched as he just smiled and walked away.


    Unknowingly, I stared at him as he retreated to wherever he was heading.


    On the first encounter, he seems nice.


    The sound of a locker being jammed shut brought me back to my senses, and I began running again.


    I whizzed by my locker and dropped my AP history text then shutting it and taking off.


    He must not see me today¡­


    I chanted that to my inner self while still running but I knew it was a waste.


    It had be a daily routine.


    Every day had be a cursed cycle, all because of him.


    I got to the parking lot and to my surprise he wasn¡¯t there, as usual, waiting for me toe out of the building so I could choose which punishment suited me most.


    My relief quickly developed into fear as Hunter had never missed a single opportunity to torment me.


    I slowed my pace this time around since the coast was clear and stylishly scanned the area for any traces of him.


    I sessfully got to my bicycle without having seen him and I was about to unchain it when I heard the devil I was avoiding.


    Hisughter.


    He had the guts tough, the effontry. While I was here, with my inner self writhing in pain both past, present and anticipated.


    I turned my head ever so slightly, to see how far away he was from me. As this had be such a routine, I had gotten used to calcting how much time I have left to escape him.


    It¡¯s not like he can¡¯t catch me even if I run.


    He was with his clique, seated on the bumper of his matte ck Mercedes car with another hoe standing in between his legs practically rubbing his thighs and her hands going a little high to his illegal area.


    With a cigarette in one hand and the other caressing therge buttocks of hisdy, he wasughing at what one of his friends said.


    They were not very far away from where I was. Looking back at my bike that was chained up, I yed a ¡®guessing game¡¯. A game where I guess how long it would take them to see me. Probably any minute now since I stand out from the crowd. I¡¯m the kid who walks around like a scared puppy.


    ¡°Miss Shawn!¡± A voice boomed out.


    I turned my head agonizingly to face my caller also known as my Devil.


    ¡°Be a good dog ande over here, okay?¡± He purred with bitterness and ego as a smirknded on his lips.


    He motioned with his finger for me to go to him. But I don¡¯t want to.


    I have never wanted to.


    But do I have a choice rather?


    I sighed and moved grudgingly to where he was and my eyes never leaving the ground.


    Why would I go? Why not make a run for it?


    I¡¯ve tried, it never ended well. Whenever I got caught next would gruesome.


    I guess, sometimes, you can¡¯t escape.


    ¡°Now, were you nning on running away without saying goodbye to papa bear?¡± He pouted mocking the fact that I thought I could evade him.


    Everyone aroundughed. Not a tiny giggle or an inconspicuous snicker, but loud roaringughter of mockery.


    They all knew the rtionship Hunter and I had, but I believe they concluded it was none of their business or were okay with whatever was going on.


    To be truthful, challenging him on anything was equivalent to putting your signature on the devil¡¯s death contract. I had watched it happen first hand and learnt not to try that in my life.


    Even now, I was still admiring the floor; it was a lot safer than looking him in the eye.Content property of N?velDra/ma.Org.


    ¡°Here, have a cigarette.¡± He said, breaking the silence that had just begun.


    I peeped at him without raising my head. His eyes had evident blood shots and a yellow tinge and he was offering me his half-blown cigarette.


    He was high again. He was always high whenever he demanded my presence. Like it was an impulse or reflex. When he¡¯s not in his right senses, my image pops in his head.


    Dealing with that was always dreadful. You don¡¯t know if you should just keep silent or retaliate.


    ¡°T-t-thank you h-hunter b-but I d-don¡¯t s-smoke,¡± I responded like a shivering stray.


    His eyes narrowed at me as I had just pped him twice on one cheek.


    ¡°Did you just reject my offer?¡± Hunter said sounding a little aggravated now.


    ¡°N-no! I didn¡¯t, I¡¯m sorry.¡± It came as a whisper but it was loud enough so he could hear me.


    ¡°Good.¡± He responded as he jumped down from his car bumper and stood right in front of me with irritation dancing in his eyes.


    ¡°I will say it again, have a cigarette.¡±


    I was still staring at his shoes when I felt a p so hard it made my neck crack a little and the wound in my mouth from two weeks ago re-opened.


    ¡°Are you deaf?¡± He was shouting now and pped me again.


    This time I fell to the floor.


    I still couldn¡¯t look him in the eyes, he had warned me against that several times and I am no longer willing to bear the consequences.


    I justid there like the weakling I am, silently sobbing because ording to him my sobs should never be heard.


    He might be right.


    He bent down and held me by the neck to pick me up. His grip was incredibly tight and I am sure he is doing this intentionally to suffocate me.


    He lifted his hand again but this time my hands shot up to block my face and my eyes squeezed shut to reduce the impact.


    But I didn¡¯t feel any hit rather I felt something hot approach my skin.


    I opened my eyes and saw him holding his cigarette stick a few inches from my neck.


    I looked up to him and I saw that smirk he put in whenever he had an idea.


    This time the tears I thought would wait till I got home before exposing themselves began pouring from my eyes.


    I nced between him and his hand after realising what he was nning to do my mouth vomited words on reflex.


    ¡°P-please.¡± I mustered the word in between my cry.


    But my plea only made him re at me, I believed there was no heart underneath this bad boy to have mercy.


    ¡°Shut the fuck up.¡± He whisper-growled into my ear and took his time in observing my face.


    ¡°Little do you know, a ck eye suits you.¡± He teased and secondster he jabbed the burning stick on my neck.


    I let out a loud cry as he pressed the cigarette harder so the stick could burn me through. The pain was infuriating.


    The hot stick was burning me so deeply I began to perceive the smell of roasted flesh and felt blood trickle down my neck.


    Please God, make him stop.


    Still strangling me, I started choking, and that was when he threw me down to the ground and threw his cigarette stick some distance away.


    I brought my hand to my neck to numb the pain, but I just felt a deep dent of flesh on my neck with blood seeping through it.


    I closed my eyes to cry and get myself back together as I waited for him to leave so I could leave also.


    ¡°Next time you don¡¯t reject my offer.¡± He red at me as he said hisst words for the day before hopping into his car and driving off.


    It took me a while to calm myself down but after regaining myposure; I got up from the floor and walked to my bicycle. Still sobbing and sniffing and made my way home.


    Where were the teachers? Same question I ask myself everyday.


    And it¡¯s the end of a normal day for me.

 Chapter 2 – Don’t say you love me.

    don¡¯t promise me tonight


    without tomorrow too,


    don¡¯t say you love me


    unless you do.


    FIFTH HARMONY- DON¡¯T SAY YOU LOVE ME.


    After I had gotten home from school, I ran straight to my room to avoid my parents.


    I really don¡¯t know if they¡¯re home anyway, but the front door was open so I suspected.


    Why am I hiding from them?


    It¡¯s not like I haven¡¯tined to them about what is going on. I have but they just told me to ¡®endure it.¡¯


    They im that with time he would give up on what he¡¯s doing.Content property of N?velDra/ma.Org.


    I HAVE TWO MORE YEARS IN THIS FREAKING SCHOOL AND HE STILL HASN¡¯T GIVEN UP.


    It all started when I moved into this town in third grade. Hunter would walk up to me and break my pencil or pour water all over my lunch or push me off the swing set so hard that I always had a chance to break my arm.


    And I have broken my arm four times because of this and I think right now I have a bad case of ¡®swing-o-phobia¡¯.


    My parents don¡¯t want to report Hunter to the authorities because Hunter¡¯s parents are my both parents employer. So they feel if they harm their son it would cost them their job.


    It hurts so much to know your parents would pick money over you any day. But it was a discovery I realized and have to live with.


    So I stopped telling them anything about it and just walk straight into my room to cry myself to sleep.


    I¡¯ve also tried reporting him to the authorities myself, but they¡¯ll either tell me I¡¯m lying or I¡¯m framing him.


    All because his parents are affluent and assist the institution in so many ways.


    The tears in my eyes never wiped off on my journey from school back to my ¡®house¡¯.


    I flopped down on the bed with a little force, andid face down on my pillow so I could finish my crying without interruption when my phone rang out.


    baby don¡¯t worry, you are my only, no need to worry, even if the the sky is falling down.


    It was the specific caller tune I set for my best friend, Megan.


    Megan was my closest friend back at my old school, but now that we are a million miles apart we onlymunicate through phone calls and we¡¯ve been doing so for years.


    ¡°Sup baby girl, how¡¯s everything?¡± Megan asked trying to sound enthusiastic, but she failed terribly at it.


    She knows fully well that I am not happy here and she knows all that has been going on between Hunter and Iq, but at least am d that although there is nothing she can do about it, she makes you feel like she cares.


    And that feels so good at this point.


    I tried to reply her to say I¡¯m okay but as Iy my head back on my pillow, the sheet brushed the burn on my neck and a sharp pain passed down my spine.


    So instead, I started crying on the phone.


    ¡°Today again?¡± she asked me sounding like she was feeling my pain. ¡°what did he do this time?¡± she proceeded to ask.


    ¡°he¡­ he¡­ burnt me¡± whispering thest part.


    ¡°goodness!! Iris are you sure you¡¯re not gonna take this to the police?¡± she started shouting, I could feel her anger building.


    ¡°yes¡± I whispered again.


    I haven¡¯t told her that I have already informed the police secretly but they shushed me saying I¡¯ll dent his family¡¯s image.


    She sighed and I proceeded to tell her how it happened. After much tears and she consoling me I asked her to tell me about her day.


    And she being Megan went ahead to tell me everything in full details even down to the underwear she wore. I put on a sad smile while listening to her.


    At least one side of my life is okay.


    A few hourster she told me what to do to treat the burn and sang me a luby with her horrible voice and that made me giggle.


    Megan could be the only person I love currently in my life.


    I ended the call and had my bath to take the advice Megan gave me concerning to injury.


    Afterwards,  I put off the light andid down under the sheets with my back towards the door.


    As usual I had difficulty sleeping and I can¡¯t do anything about it cause my sleeping pills finished this morning and I have no other money on me to get a new one yet.


    So I stared out into the window and was wandering in my thoughts when someone opened my door and the lights from the passageway illuminated my room.


    ¡°Iris, honey you awake?¡±


    It¡¯s my mom.


    Mom always came into my room every night tofort me after every day, but I stopped allowing her to when I realized she ratherfort me and earn her money than see me happy.


    A few secondster and I could still see her shadow against my wall but I did not turn to acknowledge her presence.


    I¡¯m pretty sure she realized again that as usual, I have no interest in speaking to her because I began hearing shuffling of feet like she was leaving.


    I heard her sigh before she spoke.


    ¡°goodnight sweetie¡± were her words and she shut my door quietly.


    Tears began to slip out of my eyes once more because I keep on realising how much distance had grown between my parents and I .


    It had be so terrible that I had to burn every god-damned picture of us three.


    They don¡¯t care about me cause if they did none of this would be happening.


    That conclusion didn¡¯t help my wounded heart but it¡¯s better to ept the truth than pretend to be okay with a lie.


    And with that thought I cried myself to sleep.

 Chapter 3 – Magic

    I¡¯ve been waiting for a magic moment, but maybe there are magic moments


    SIA- MAGIC


    I got up earlier than my rm clock this morning¡­. believe me when I say its bing something usual.


    I had a really hot bath before looking at my reflection in the mirror.


    Jesus Christ!


    I look like a zombie just gave me zombie-cooties. The burnt dent in my neck had a ck pink coloration, my ck eye had began to clear up leaving a purple botch around it and my ribs still hurt from all the falling I did yesterday.


    Arrrrrgh!!! I need aplete makeover!!


    It took aplete hour to cover up my horrendous ws, and by then the sun was already up too.


    I put a hoodie on my sleeveless shirt and got down for breakfast.


    My mum was frying eggs and my dad sat by the counter reading a newspaper when I walked in.


    ¡°oh, she¡¯s up¡± my dad said dropping his newspaper ¡°how are you darling?¡± he proceeded to ask.


    I just nodded.


    We hardly have conversations anymore. No longer like the days when we would talk about how it would have been cooler if my mom gave birth to another child so I won¡¯t be alone and she would tease me saying I¡¯ll carry the pregnancy and my dad will wiggle his brows at me.


    so much for love.


    ¡°So¡­. how¡¯s school going for yad?¡± my dad continued asking to bring up a conversation but I just continued with a nod.


    My mom said nothing and that was better for her. I mean she was the first person i cried out my heart to almost everyday because I thought she cared, little did I know she was just consoling me outta pity but she needed her buckaroo. yuck!


    ¡°err¡­ well¡­ you need a ride to school?¡± dad asked again, but this time be looked ufortable.


    Good, he better feel it!


    After shaking my head in a no response I hoisted up and out of the kitchen. In the driveway, I decided to take my car today since it is a faster means to get to school and out.


    On my reverse, mom came out to the lot looking like she may have jogged a little to catch up with me.


    ¡°Are you free after school today?¡± she asked looking at the car I was using.


    ¡°It¡¯s preferable if you ask me, would I make it home alive today?¡±


    ¡°I know you would¡±


    ¡°I doubt that¡±


    ¡°but are you busy?¡±


    ¡°yes¡±


    ¡°doing what?¡±


    ¡°nning to live¡±


    ¡°Iris I-¡± I didn¡¯t let her finish then I drove off to school. I don¡¯t have time to really waste.


    ¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª-


    I got to school a bit earlier than the allocated time and after using a few seconds to cover my head with my hoodie, I walked into the hallway.


    To receive another heart wrenching shock of the week.


    Hunter was standing by my locker with his gang and on seeing him, I reflexively took my hand to my neck and re-felt the sore wound. I was not ready for another one. At least not yet.


    I approached my locker looking to the ground again.


    I¡¯m a coward


    A big stupid coward.


    Once I got to where they were, it took a billion nerves of courage to speak up.


    ¡°p-please c-can i get m-my b-b-book?¡± I said and as usual, it was almost a whisper but I expected him to at least hear it.


    He just red at me, then smirked before moving away.


    what the!!


    he just moved!!


    without hitting me!!


    That was thest reaction I had expected.


    I thought I may have been pped or possibly insulted loudly but rather he listened to me.


    Maybe he really has given up.


    ¡°t-thank you¡± came my response, a lot louder this time.


    I was about to open the locker when he held my head and lowered his head to my ear.Belongs to ? n0velDrama.Org.


    I knew it was too good to be true.


    ¡± Never, I repeat never!! in your miserable life talk to me¡±


    I felt shivers go down my spine but this was not in the case of what lovers felt. Mine was due to absolute fear.


    ¡°am s-sorry¡± I managed to say with tears threatening to spill from my eyes yet again.


    ¡°yeah I know but I think you should still learn your lesson¡± and with that he gripped my head tighter and bashed my head onto my locker.


    I felt ringing in my ears, then saw Hunter and his crew run off before every thing went ck.

 Chapter 4 – Too good at goodbyes

    I¡¯m never gonna let you close to me, even though you mean the most to me, cause everytime I open up it hurts


    SAM SMITH- TOO GOOD AT GOODBYES


    I woke up with a terrible headache and tried sitting up.Belongs to ? n0velDrama.Org.


    It was so damn hard I even began thinking that I had been drugged or possibly paralyzed.


    I looked round where I was and noticed it¡¯s the schools clinic.


    how??


    That¡¯s when I remembered everything with hunter running off and hitting my head on the locker.


    I turned my head to the left and saw the nurse typing on herputer.


    ¡°Miss Joanne?¡± I called out to her and she jolted away from her system.


    ¡± Oh my goodness, you¡¯re awake!¡± she responded almost shocked I had woken up.


    Immediately, she stood from her chair and came up to scan my forehead with her eyes and fingers.


    ¡°The head injury looked so serious, I thought that maybe it was a hemorrhage¡± she continued to say as she tinted my head to the left.


    ¡°do you feel anything?¡± She asks as she adjusted her sses that was slightly slipping off her nose bridge.


    ¡°just a slight headache¡±


    ¡°how did this happen?¡± She asks again, taking a seat beside me.


    I blinked twice before giving an answer to her.


    ¡°I was running to ss because I arrivedte at school, so I slipped and I think hit my head?¡± thest part sounded like a question even to me.


    ¡°Are you sure honey? if you slipped I would have seen a scratch but I saw nothing¡± she asked further


    ¡± yeah am sure¡± I was done reporting Hunter. All they would do was warn him or threaten give him suspension which they never would.


    ¡°hmmmm¡­. you seem so unsure, are you sure maybe someone didn¡¯t run into you to make you hit your head?¡± more questions


    ¡°yes ma¡¯am, very sure¡± I replied trying to sit up.


    ¡°okay then¡± she started saying whilst getting up and going to her table


    ¡°your bandage would need to be changed every three days considering the bleeding. Your medication is to be taken thrice daily. Morning, Afternoon and night endeavor not to miss it cause you¡¯re on some antibiotics. oh and your blood tonic is to be taken only once by the time you choose¡±


    ¡°thanks¡± I muttered while she came back to where I wasid and helped me sit up.


    ¡°how did I get here?¡± I asked her becausest I remember, Hunter ran off.


    And he would nevere back.


    ¡± As I was going to my office, I saw you unconscious and it¡¯s my duty to attend to you. Really the least I could do¡± she said handing me my drugs.


    Oh, so Hunter hadn¡¯t changed. good to know.


    ¡°thanks a lot for everything Miss Joanne¡± I got down from the bed I wasying on.


    ¡°Can I take the day off and go home¡± or go to the building i sleep in?


    I asked because I was already exhausted without doing a thing.


    ¡± Were you nning on learning with a half smashed brain?¡± she asked me, cocking an eyebrow.


    I let out a light chuckle at her response before speaking again.


    ¡± Thanks ma¡¯am¡± I responded after checking my drug contents but I couldn¡¯tugh much as my ribs were aching from yesterday¡¯s encounter with Hunter.


    I walked out of the clinic that was located just down the hallway. And saw the guy who helped me with my sses yesterday across the hallway talking with Hunter.


    And they wereughing.


    Great someone who finally sought to help me is getting poisoned by the viper.


    I snuck out of the hall praying to be unnoticed. And hallelujah I was sessful.


    For once.


    Thank goodness I took the car, I wasn¡¯t sure if I could ride a bike with the pains all over my body.


    Still, it was a painful ride.


    __________________________


    I got home and after parking the car, I walked up to the porch and checked under the flower pot by the step for the house key but it was missing.


    So I knocked on the door instead since they may be home.


    My mom opened the door and her mouth opened so wide I wondered why her jaw hadn¡¯t broken yet.


    I pushed passed her and nced at the clock in the living room.


    just eleven am!!


    I hadn¡¯t even spent six hours in school and I needed to be home already.


    ¡°what happened!?¡± my mom asked pulling me out of my trance.


    ¡°nothing¡±


    ¡°don¡¯t you dare say nothing, you have a bandaged head and blood in your hair¡±


    ¡°really? I didn¡¯t notice¡±


    ¡°Iris!?¡±


    ¡°Leave me alone mom¡±


    as if she cares!!


    as if she fucking cares!!


    And I barged into my room, jamming the door on my way in and locking it.


    sorry door.


    ¡°Iris speak to me!¡± I heard my mom say trying to open the door.


    ha! it¡¯s locked


    I dropped my backpack on the bed and turned to the bathroom to put on the shower in my bath.


    ¡°just open the door please we need to talk¡± she said again sounding a little softer than a while ago.


    ¡°no¡±


    ¡°please, Iris, I need to know what¡¯s wrong¡±


    ¡°nothing is!¡±


    ¡°you can¡¯t block me out forever, please I need to speak to you if not for anything at least for the fact you¡¯re my daughter¡±


    ¡°oh, so you recognize that¡±


    ¡°Iris!¡±


    ¡°no¡±


    ¡°please¡­. we can¡¯t go on like this¡± she sounded at the verge of tears.


    I¡¯ve blocked my mom out for the past two years and it hurt because my mom used to be my best friend.


    and she just gave you up for money.


    That¡¯s enough reason to never let her in again.


    ¡°I think I can¡±


    I would not cry!!


    ¡°Iris¡­. please¡± now her voice sounded like she was in tears.


    I don¡¯t care!


    I don¡¯t give a fuck!!


    But it still made a tear drop from my right eye.


    In a matter of seconds, I was crying too. Crying at everything I had lost, everyone I had told goodbye.


    how did things change so fast?


    Even though it still hurts, I wasn¡¯t as stupid to let her in once more. It would be in stupid of me.


    ¡°Go away mom¡± and with that I walked into the bathroom and shut the door.


    I¡¯m way too good at goodbyes.

 Chapter 5 – Dark Side

    Cause everybody has a dark side and I¡¯m across, never meant to be the bad guy but now I¡¯m lost


    ZARA LARSSON- DARK SIDE


    After having my bath, I put on a in white shirt with shorts andid on my bed. Just staring at my ceiling.


    Too good at goodbyes by sam Smith ring through my headset and Iughed at the sudden coincidence of my ylist and my life.


    This song is a technical motivation to block out so many toxic people in my life right now.N?velDrama.Org holds this content.


    like Vicky..


    Vicky was my friend at my early days in school but she walked out of my lifest year when Hunter had asked her to be his girlfriend.


    Yeah, she left me.


    I really don¡¯t me her though. Who would choose a bullied little sixteen year old over a hot rich jock that looked undeniably hot and sexy.


    no one would.


    not even my parents


    That made me wonder sometimes, if Megan had met Hunter would she still be a friend to me?


    I doubt so.


    The next song to y from my headset was dark side by Zara Larsson. I really loved that song plus the fact that you could interprete it in a million ways possible depending on how you feel.


    After a few minutes of tossing and stirring on the bed reality hit me that I haven¡¯t had a good meal since breakfast.


    I turned to check the time and it was just five. Clearly giving me four more hours till my next medication.


    I got up from the bed exchanging my headset for earphones, and changing from shorts to sweatpants.


    It took a while butter on, I scrambled downstairs with my hoodie over my head again.


    I approached the main door but I was stopped when my dad spoke.


    ¡°Iris, your mom told me something¡± his tone sounded like he¡¯s aiming for a conversation.


    How amusing.


    ¡°oh, and what could that be?¡± i responded sarcastically without turning back to face him


    ¡°turn around and let me see you¡±


    Really?? At this point in life all he could do was give me amand??.


    ¡°yeah, I could do that or I could just walk out this door and pretend we didn¡¯t have this conversation¡±


    ¡°please turn around¡± he pleaded but desperation suits no one dad.


    ¡°yeah thetter seems a lot more fun to me¡±


    And with that I walked out the door.


    fuck he cares!!


    he can go to hell with his pocket of change.


    I marched out angrily and felt another set of tears about to spilled but I ain¡¯t having it.


    The sky seems oddly dark today. Okay the sun was setting and all, but it looked kinda rainy. And it seemed chilly.


    Good thing I wore my hood.


    like I could ever leave my room without it.


    I walked for a while still listening to some songs on my ylist before arriving at Tucker¡¯s.


    Tucker¡¯s was the burger shop I worked in on fridays only so I could have a little money at hand without asking my parents.


    Believe me, I felt like their cash was blood money. Well actually it is.


    With my blood.


    I saw Tucker the owner of this mignifiq?e at a corner of the restaurant by the vending machine, looking like he was holding a staring contest with it.


    This man never seizes to amuse me, I mean just looking at him could send you reeling inughter.


    I pushed my arms into the pocket of the hoodie and walked up to him.


    ¡°Good evening Tucker¡± I said while skipping to his side.


    ¡± Girl, you sound cheerful. Gottenid yet?¡± he responded with his western ent tearing his gaze away from the vending machine to me.


    My eyes just widened in shock. I wanted to reply but my words weren¡¯t coherent. so I shook my head in reply instead.


    ¡°And here I was thinking about matching my stripped trousers with a green shirt and purple suspenders to make a grand entrance into the wedding to shout I have an objection pastor, this youngdy is my wife¡±


    ¡± Oh no, you aren¡¯t wearing that to my wedding¡± I teased and we both burst outughing, but I winced a little because of the pain in my ribs.


    ¡°you okay kid?¡± he asked narrowing his eyes at me as we made our way back to the counter.


    ¡°yeah yeah am fine¡± I brushed off the topic. I don¡¯t even wanna think about it.


    ¡°oh yeah, exin the bandage¡± he said that¡¯s when I realized I still had the bandage on.


    shit I can¡¯t lie now


    or can I?


    ¡± I was running in the hallways and hit my head so hard I had a concussion¡± I said casually and even added a shrug.


    Damn I¡¯m a liar.


    ¡°oh and the hallway was on fire¡± he questioned again. What was with everyone and questioning me today?


    ¡°err.. no?¡±


    ¡°Good, then exin the burn on your neck also¡±


    how the hell had he seen that.


    ¡°An ident¡± I replied looking down. I couldn¡¯t lie to him in the face.


    At least not when I¡¯m almost caught.


    He just sighed, leaned on the counter and said lowly to me ¡°you know you can talk to me right?, you can tell me anything.¡±


    I nodded at his statement but it¡¯s not like I¡¯m gonna be doing that anytime soon.


    Yeah I knew I could talk to him, but i didn¡¯t just want to add you to my list of people who¡¯ll abandon me to suffer just to be on the safe side.


    ¡°Good, so what can I get ya?¡± he stood straight and put on his smile that had disappeared  during our little chitchat.


    ¡°A burger and banana milkshake will do please¡± I answered gleefully like a five year old.


    ¡°she¡¯s aiming for a belly just like mine¡± Tuckerughed while patting his protruding belly.


    ¡°I¡¯m aiming for bigger¡± I winked at him and we bothughed once again with a little less enthusiasm on my side.


    ¡°oh my, seven hundred bottles of Tequ would do the trick in two days¡±


    ¡°Jesus!!!, a big belly not a big hole in the liver!!¡± I shouted at him in absolute shock.


    Is he trying to kill me?


    ¡± Ordering right up¡± he said in betweenughing and going to the backroom.


    I looked round the ce and nothing had changed, nothing usually changes though.


    The order took a while so I began humming Beethoven¡¯s f¨¹r d¡¯elise to myself to while away my time.


    A few minutester, he came back with my food.


    ¡°thank you¡± I said putting a little cash on the table.


    ¡°keep the change¡± he whispered and winked at me


    With a bright smile, I collected my order.


    ¡°thanks a lot, I owe you one¡± i whispered then took my money back and waved him a goodbye before walking out of the restaurant.


    The weather had chilled an awful lot so I hugged my body for warmth and started walking to the park.


    But then a voice from behind stopped me dead in my tracks.


    ¡°someone skipped school today¡±

 Chapter 6 – Silence

    And i have never had someone to call my own,


    I¡¯ve been looking for a real one to hold on to


    MARSHMELLO FT KHALID- SILENCE


    Oh shit


    Instinctively, without even turning around, my hand¡¯s shot up to cover my face, in case of any impending strikes on my body.


    Spilling my milkshake and dropping my food on the gravel that was damp with dew.


    ¡°I¡¯m sorry, the nurse told me I wasn¡¯t stable enough to stay at school so I went home, I¡¯m so so s-sorry, please don¡¯t hit me¡± I whimpered in fear hoping he might have mercy since we were in public.


    ¡°the nurse?¡± He asked with confusion in his voice and that was when I realized that voice didn¡¯t belong to Hunter. I perked my head up to see who it was.


    It¡¯s the guy who helped me with my sses. He stood few feet away from me with his arms crossed, wearing a stoic expression.


    ¡°you were at the nurse¡¯s today?¡± he asked up again and I realized I hadn¡¯t answered him the first time he asked a question.


    ¡°yeah I was¡± I was shivering right now and I think it was due to the weather and the aftermath of the shock.


    ¡°Iris, are you okay?¡± He was looking at me in a quizzical manner. At this point the wind picked up and I hugged myself tighter to create a lot more heat within.


    ¡°let¡¯s go¡± was the next thing he said before stooping down to pick my spilled food.


    ¡°I¡¯ll get you another meal nearby¡± he says after throwing my food into the bin and he began walking towards a direction.


    After taking a few steps forward and realised he was walking alone he decided to turn back and check on me. I was still glued to my spot, contemting whether or not to trust this guy.


    I literally saw himughing away with my enemy.


    ¡°Aren¡¯t you gonnae?¡± He asked, but I just stood there staring. He sighed loudly and added a six letter word that seemed so innocent ¡°please?¡±.


    Still dumbfounded, I grudgingly walked a few steps behind him. Not saying a word.


    We walked for a very short while before stopping by an Audi car. He brought out his keys and pressed a button that brought the car to live.


    Sure i was ying the dumb one here, but hell this baby was hot. The red car just looked like a devil mobile.


    ¡± here, get in¡± He said opening the passenger door for me. I eyed him waringly for a second before he chuckled and whispered ¡°I ain¡¯t a kidnapper baby¡±.


    For some reasons that statement made me a lot lessfortable. I got in and sat down, leaning my head on the window as he jogged up to the driver¡¯s and got in.


    He started the vehicle and soon we were driving off at a smooth tempo.


    ¡ã?¡ã?¡ã?¡ã?¡ã?¡ã?¡ã?¡ã?¡ã?¡ã?¡ã?¡ã?¡ã?¡ã?¡ã?¡ã?¡ã?¡ã?¡ã?¡ã?¡ã?¡ã?¡ã


    A few minutes passed and we were still on the road. I wanted to ask where we were going but I was still choosing not to say a word.


    Staring out the window at the now dark sky. The rain had begun falling and all I could do was observe as rain drops did little races on my ss.


    Yeah I¡¯m in a car with a really hot guy and all I can do is watch a liquid tournament. I¡¯m really a lot more miserable than I thought.


    I checked the time on my phone for what seems like the hundredth time since I got in the car and it was three minutes left to clock seven.


    The guy beside me sighed and finally spoke to break the silence ¡± You aren¡¯t gonna say anything?¡±.


    I didn¡¯t reply.Content provided by N?velDrama.Org.


    ¡°Are you an introvert or you¡¯re just trying to shun me?¡±


    still didn¡¯t reply.


    ¡°why did you leave school today?¡±


    I¡¯m surprised you noticed since you were kind of busy with the reason.


    I still didn¡¯t respond.


    ¡°Iris how-¡± he started but I cut him off.


    now i had something to speak of.


    ¡± How do you know my name?¡± was all I asked still looking at my window. I didn¡¯t mean to be rude, but such a kind gesture from someone who supported my bully¡¯s act towards me was not needed.


    ¡°The question should be why don¡¯t you know mine?¡± He replied. I didn¡¯t turn my head to see him but I could view his reflection through the ss and I saw him looking at me intently.


    ¡°I asked you a question¡± I said with a stern voice. And after hearing him sigh he replied.


    ¡°because I know you?¡± it came out more like a question.


    ¡°how?¡± I asked again, but this time turning to face him and I met with the most beautiful green eyes I had ever seen before. They seemed so rogue like the jungle green but tamed like a garden hue, with a little ring of chocte brown at the external and a ck pupil. They were so full of life and if I didn¡¯t know better I would have said sincerity but to hell with it, you can¡¯t trust no man.


    But the way he looked at me I¡¯d believe he was honest about knowing me as he said and yet his eyes held a glint of a familiar persona.


    The only thing is I don¡¯t know this guy.


    ¡°why are you asking how? can¡¯t someone know you?¡± He answered still looking me back in my eye. And I was brought back to reality from his eyes.


    I sincerely wished I could stare at those hearty eyes all night.


    But no, I had to refrain. This would only get me hurt as usual. I ripped my gaze from him and took interest in my window again.


    ¡°nobody is supposed to know me¡± I whispered against the window so lowly but I wont be shocked if he managed to catch my words.


    After a few seconds of silence, he broke it with his words.


    ¡°my name¡¯s Clement¡±

 Chapter 7 – Start of something new

    This could be the start


    of something new,


    It feels so right


    To be here with you


    HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL- START OF SOMETHING NEW.


    The rain had stopped and now just a few drops grazed the floor at a time with a very damp wind.


    We pulled up in front of a restaurant with an enormous parking lot a few minutester.


    After staying in the car for what felt like ages, I decided to speak up.


    ¡°what are we doing here? I thought you were gonna take me home?¡±  I asked looking at the huge restaurant in front of the vehicle with arge signboard above it glowing in the night sky.


    It read cre¨¨me.


    ¡°I promised to get you food so here we are¡± He said like it¡¯s the most casual statement he makes daily.


    I couldn¡¯t even respond. This restaurant was so huge and so chic that they¡¯ll mistake me for a hobo if I walk in there. I turned to see ¡®Clement¡¯ since I never had a good look at him to grasp what he was wearing while ignoring him.


    He was putting on a Versace ck polo with it¡¯s logo bold in front. The shirt was a tight fitted on him like a second skin and his body looked like it were screaming hotness all over.


    With a camouge trouser and a ck and white sneakers. He looked like a million dors. Probably because of the added peace sign chain and his Rolex.


    ¡± Well if your n was to eat me instead, you could have actually just given me your house address¡± he said with a smirk, pulling me out of my admiration trance.


    I on the other hand was confused. Literally not knowing the meaning of what he just said I had to ask.


    ¡± Eat you? I¡¯m not a human carnivore. I actually prefer nts in most cases¡±


    He seemed kind of shocked at my reply but then shed me a million dor smile. I kept my straight face on because I had no idea what was funny. He literally called me a blood thirsty human and that I am not.


    ¡°I¡¯ll let this pass just for now because this is the most you¡¯ve said tonight¡± He said still smiling.


    I just held a confused expression.


    Let it pass? what does he take me for? I know I don¡¯t eat people but why is he so insistent on it!!?.


    ¡°you really don¡¯t know what I meant when i said eat me, do you?¡± Now was his turn to ask again. While he just gazed at me, I began thinking maybe there¡¯s another meaning to it.


    I held his gaze and slightly shook my head to indicate a no. And heughed.


    I bowed my head in embarrassment because I knew very well he wasughing at me. They always do.


    ¡± Coulduld it be possible to be this innocent in this world?¡± He asked me but I¡¯m sure it was rhetoric. With my head still down I almost cried at my disgrace.Content property of N?velDra/ma.Org.


    A guy who didn¡¯t know me before has finally found out I¡¯m as useless as can be directly from me. Not like he listened to other people¡¯s judgement about me to take note of my stupidity.


    ¡± Come on, we ain¡¯t got all night¡± and with that he got out of the car and walked over to my door.


    I opened it and got out to meet him. For heaven¡¯s sake, I am wearing a hoodie and I can still feel the harsh weather but he has a short sleeve shirt on and he isn¡¯t even flinching.


    He took my hand from my side almost suddenly, but it did take me by surprise. I dragged my hand away like he burnt me and he just looked at me with odd eyes.


    ¡°I won¡¯t hurt you¡± was all he said and took my hand again. But this time I let him.


    We walked into the restaurant and we were greeted by ady in green uniform. She looks young but still older than twenty if you ask me.


    yeah but no one would care to ask you.


    I swallowed air at that thought and bowed my head while walking in.


    ¡± Where would you like to sit?¡± was what I heard so close to my ear that I noticed he had leaned in and my shoulder was making contact with his chest.


    This little move was not supposed to have effects on anyone. But it did on me. This was the closest I had ever gotten to any guy that wasn¡¯t going to hit me.


    After ignoring the slight tug on my chest I nced around the building to search for a spot.


    But I had to stop.


    ¡°I don¡¯t belong here¡± I whispered to him with my head hanging low.


    ¡°And why is that?¡± his tone more of surprised than disappointed.


    ¡± Everyone here is different¡± I replied.


    And it was the truth. Every other person here held their head¡¯s up in pride and put on an aura of ss. While my presence just spelt misery.


    ¡± Then that makes you special¡± he whiispered into my ear but this time a little breathily and it got me blushing.


    At the ground though.


    ¡± Let¡¯s take the seat at the extreme end since I¡¯m pretty sure if we seat any where else you might pop¡± he continued speaking.


    Still feeling a little flushed from his contact I just nodded because my voice failed me.


    We took our seats and just a minuteter a male waiter appeared and he took our orders.


    Actually Clement¡¯s order¡¯s because I was feeling too odd to get something he would end up paying for so he ended up ordering for me.


    All this attention feels so odd to me.


    Am I owing him something??


    I probably would remember if I was. Or I may have forgotten. Maybe that¡¯s why he expects me to know him.


    ¡± Iris? You okay?¡± He calls out and I feel a sweat bead on my forehead.


    ¡± I¡¯m owing you, aren¡¯t I?¡± I slowly asked, I needed to know what¡¯s going on.


    ¡± Owing me? What made you think that?¡±


    ¡± Everything did. You know my name and expect me to know you. You following me. I¡¯m owing you, I swear I¡¯ll pay back if only you could remind me¡±


    He sighed and almost looked like he¡¯s not understanding what I just said.


    ¡± I¡¯m just trying to get to know you. You know, start something new¡±


    Start something new?


    With me?


    ¡± W-why?¡± I stuttered and he only shrugged as he took a sip from his ss of water.


    The waiter came back with our orders almost too quickly.

 Chapter 8 – Demons

    I wanna hide the truth


    I wanna shelter you


    But with that beast inside


    There¡¯s no where


    we can hide


    IMAGINE DRAGONS- DEMONS


    The dinner was mostly quiet, well more like Clement asking questions and me just blinking or nodding.


    Once I was done with my spaghetti, which seemed like a shock to me cause I never realized how hungry I was. Clement and I made our way back for the car and set out as it was already some minutes past nine.


    After a while of driving, I decided to speak. I turned to face him and opened my mouth


    ¡± Thank you for the dinner, I¡¯m sorry I couldn¡¯t pay for anything¡­ I didn¡¯t have enough money on me since I¡¯ll need a little fare to get back home¡± right now I could have eaten myself. I was red from embarrassment.


    maybe that¡¯s why he felt I might have wanted to eat him?


    Now he knows how poor and miserable you are.


    He didn¡¯t say anything, he just tightened his grip on the steering wheel.


    He¡¯s finally gonna hit me.


    I watched as he clenched and unclenched his fist like a vice around the car control and I couldn¡¯t help myself.


    The pain from the concussion had taken a toll on me. I didn¡¯t need another injury as I might just pass out.


    A stray tear left my right eye before I could control it.


    ¡°please I¡¯m sorry, don¡¯t hit me, I didn¡¯t know you were gonna take me somewhere, I promise to pay-¡±


    ¡± Iris what¡¯s been going on?¡±


    At this point my face was tear stained and it was only now he actually had a look at my face and noticed that. His eyes widened by an inch at his sight.


    He pulled up by the roadside and shut the engine. I took that as my queue and looked away from him.


    ¡± Goodnight¡± I managed to mumble with a voice that was now hoarse.


    His brows furrowed in confusion while I tried to open the door but it wouldn¡¯t bulge.


    ¡± Last I checked, this neighborhood was formercial businesses only.¡± he asked me who was almost hyperventting because of the ns I believed he had in mind.


    ¡°I¡¯ll take a cab from here¡± I managed to muster courage and speak.


    ¡°why?¡±


    I couldn¡¯t answer the obvious, he already knew his n but he wants me to say it so it¡¯ll probably look like I asked for it.


    I¡¯ve seen this trick much more than once with Hunter.


    He sighed loudly and asked again.


    ¡°Iris, what¡¯s wrong?¡±


    He sounded unbelievably genuine but I can¡¯t fall for it.


    Now I was crying harder than before. I can¡¯t take any more hits today, please I need a break.


    ¡°please let me go¡± I whispered


    ¡°huh?¡± I knew he had heard me but is acting like he didn¡¯t. I¡¯m slowly angering him.


    ¡°please¡± I whispered now looking down, I¡¯ve been thought never to look at your superior in the eye.


    He tried to grab my chin to look at him but I flinched and jerked away.


    He sighed again, but louder this time and captured my hand.


    ¡°look at me¡± his voice was suspiciously calm for someone who is about to turn me into a punching bag.


    ¡°Iris please¡±


    please? he¡¯s begging me?


    That¡¯s another thing I haven¡¯t heard in forever.


    Slowly I looked up and I met his eyes, full of concern.


    ¡± I would never hit you¡± he said as his eyes searched mine.


    Is he for real? he doesn¡¯t wanna hit me?


    ¡°r-really?¡± I asked with a wavering voice


    ¡± Yes really, I just need you to tell me what¡¯s wrong with you, why would you think I wanna hit you?¡±


    He wasn¡¯t gonna hit me, he even sounds like he cares about me. Should I tell him? but what if I do and Hunter finds out? He would treat him the same way he treated those who wanted to fight for me.


    And guess what happens after that.


    They all runaway from me, run far far away.


    So I shouldn¡¯t put him at that risk. I can¡¯t put anyone through that risk.


    But what if he¡¯s just pitying me and doesn¡¯t care? yeah that¡¯s it. I can detect that fa?ade anywhere since I witness it first hand from my parents.


    ¡°nothing¡± I grumbled, pulled my hand away from his and returned to my original position. looking out the window.


    ¡± Did you just say nothing? you have a bandage around your head¡±


    I didn¡¯t grace that statement with an answer.


    ¡°Iris is someone hitting you?¡± his voice came out strained like the word hitting had a venom within it.


    ¡°No¡± was all I gave as a response and still kept my gaze out.


    ¡°why are you hiding this and bottling it up? why not just talk about it, you look really hurt¡±


    I¡¯m okay.


    That¡¯s what I tried to say but rather I saw tears cloud my vision.


    ¡°please let me in¡± his voice sounded so weak and fragile, shallow and tender. but I won¡¯t fall for this fake care again, I¡¯ve had enough.Content provided by N?velDrama.Org.


    Who does he think he is? we just met yesterday and he¡¯s already trying to crack me, so he can use my misery for fun. Nobody cares its that simple.


    ¡°I can¡¯t¡± I wanted to sound strong but my weakness overpowered and it came out shaken.


    Without another word he faced his view and began driving again. And I resumed my usual activity.


    crying.

 Chapter 9 – Savior

    I¡¯ve been looking for a savior


    I¡¯ve been looking for a real


    one to hold on to, I¡¯ve been


    looking  for a savior


    SAVIOR- IGGY AZALEA FT QUAVO


    After a few curves and turns we were approaching the restaurant. I sat up on my chair, getting ready to hop out.


    But he just passed by the building.


    ¡°err-you¡¯ve p-passed the ce¡± I muttered to him.


    ¡°yeah, I know. I¡¯m dropping you off at home¡± was his curt response and he continued driving without giving me a nce.


    Maybe I really offended someone who just bought me dinner.


    ¡± Do y-you need my ad-ddress?¡± God why am I such a whimp.


    ¡± Not necessarily. I know where I¡¯m headed¡± his words came out through slightly gritted teeth.


    He knows where he¡¯s headed!!


    I felt all the blood drain from my face.


    I¡¯m dead.


    He turned to look at me and burst outughing.


    Why are humans so impable. what is so funny in murder!?


    ¡°Gosh Iris take it easy, I mean I know where you house is, no need to turn all blue¡±


    ¡°oh¡± I said then let out a really awkwardugh.


    ¡°sorry if I¡¯m making you ufortable, I didn¡¯t mean to scare you¡±


    I didn¡¯t dignify that with a response. I just faced my window once more to view my horrid image.


    Our drive home was oddly silent and I had no idea I had fallen asleep till I felt a light tapping on my shoulder.


    I turned to the direction of the impulse and opened my eyes by a fraction of an inch.


    ¡°Iris, you¡¯re home¡± Clement said as soon as he got my attention.


    After stifling a yawn, I blinked a few times to adjust my blurred vision and saw my ¡®house¡¯.


    ¡°thank you¡±


    And I was shocked because that thank you didn¡¯te from me.


    It came from the guy who bought me an expensive dinner, the same one who I used of trying to abuse me and this same guy brought me home.


    And he¡¯s telling me thank you.


    ¡°uhm¡­ are you okay?¡± I really needed to ask, maybe spending time with me has caused a few knots holding the brain together to loosen.


    He just gave another vibratingughter and I had the opportunity of observing his features again. This guy is really cute. How can someone be so pretty?. I¡¯m a girl and I¡¯m as hideous as the ground can be.


    ¡°I said thank you cause I mean it, you could have just walked away when I asked you to join me but you didn¡¯t, sure you said as limited words as possible but your personality is kinda fun¡­ you know¡­ leaving out the hurt part¡± he said and lowered his voice like he was talking to an estranged animal while saying thest words.


    I couldn¡¯t still believe my ears. he¡¯s being nice to me. Maybe I could give him a try?


    ¡°thank you¡± now it¡¯s my turn to express gratitude.


    ¡°don¡¯t sweat it¡± he grinned at his statement and continued to speak


    ¡°hey, we can be friends right?¡±


    Friends? the only friend I have is a thousand miles away and here is someone asking to be friends?


    I don¡¯t even know how to be a friend, maybe that¡¯s why people find it easy to avoid me? I¡¯m not the friendliest nor the prettiest. I¡¯m not fun nor interesting. I¡¯m just a below average girl with a heart broken from all aspects and he wants to be friends?


    What could I possibly offer? my tears? a body in recement for his punching bag? what?


    ¡± Why do you want to be friends with me?¡± I wanted to sound brave saying that but as usual I had to be a failure and my voice came out ragged like I just ran a marathon.


    ¡± Why shouldn¡¯t I be?¡± he added a shrug.


    Is he taking pity on me cause I don¡¯t have any friends? He now considers me lonely and helpless because I¡¯m miserable.


    ¡± You don¡¯t have to pity me¡± I needed to let that out of my mind. But when I did he looked confused.


    ¡± Pity? why would I, like I said, you¡¯re amazing and I¡¯ll really like to know you better, If only you can trust me¡±


    ¡± You never said I was amazing¡± to be honest. I never heard him say that to me.


    ¡± Well I¡¯m saying it now, you are amazing¡± he responded with a smile that could blind the stars.


    I had to look down cause I was terribly blushing. He is the first person in my entire lifetime over here to say that to me, maybe he doesn¡¯t mean it.


    But his eyes look a whole lot genuine of his words.


    ¡°Iris?¡± he called out


    ¡°yeah?¡± I couldn¡¯t still look up


    ¡°you¡¯re red¡±


    ¡°o-oh, s-sorry¡± This car should just magically swallow me now, he¡¯s disgusted by my blush. I¡¯m useless.


    ¡°Iris?¡±


    I was too embarrassed to answer him, I just shut my eyes trying not to cry from my disgrace.


    ¡°Iris look at me¡±


    No response from me.


    ¡°look at me¡± he persuaded but I can¡¯t. I¡¯ve learned not to look anyone in the eye.


    ¡°I can¡¯t¡± was all I said but that wasn¡¯t all that happened, I felt a warm hand take a soft and gentle grip at my chin and tilted my head to look into perfect glittering eyes.


    But then that face contorted into somewhat of shock.


    ¡± Why are you crying, did I say something wrong?¡±


    I could only respond by shaking my head with a light tear grazing my cheek.


    ¡± Then why are you crying?¡± he asked wiping away the tear with his thumb.


    Why am I crying? I¡¯m crying cause I¡¯m scarred, I¡¯m crying cause I¡¯m in pain, I¡¯m crying cause I¡¯m hated, I¡¯m crying cause I¡¯ve been rejected, I¡¯ve been hit, hurt and torn apart a million ways than I can remember. I¡¯m crying because I¡¯m scared to trust. I¡¯m crying because I¡¯m so terrified of death but I¡¯m more scared cause that death is my only salvation.


    I have a billion reasons to cry but I just can¡¯t tell you. I can¡¯t tell anyone.


    ¡± If we be friends, promise to never hurt me?¡± I never knew when those words escaped my lips. But once they did I mmed my hands on my mouth to shield my regret.


    ¡°I¡¯m so sorry, I didn¡¯t mean to say that, please forgive me¡± I blurted within seconds.


    He stayed, still holding my chin with an unreadable expression. He dropped his hand from my chin and did the unbelievable.


    He brought out his pinky and said


    ¡°Pinky swear, I promise in my whole life and the life after that, and the life after that, never ever to hurt you. I swear by the friendship of Scooby and shaggy¡±


    With my hand still covering my mouth and my eyes opened wide, I took in what just happened.


    He isn¡¯t being serious is he?


    While I was still in my thoughts, he raised one brow and watched me, with his pinky still up.


    ¡± You¡¯re serious?¡± I asked him as he gave a really dramatic gasp and ced his second hand on his chest.


    ¡± uh-un.. sister no one, I repeat, no one jokes with the bond of scooby and shaggy¡±Belongs to ? n0velDrama.Org.


    I couldn¡¯t believe it and I also couldn¡¯t hold it in.


    I burst outughing. Not a fakeugh I have to give Megan over the phone, but a real one that got my stomach hurting. He made meugh. Wow.


    ¡± Sooo¡­ do we pinky swear?¡± he asked when myughter had died down.


    I just smiled and ced my pinky over his after giving me a satisfied smile he spoke.


    ¡± Goodnight miss Iris, I¡¯m highly pleased to be your countenance¡± with a bow and I bowed in response.


    ¡± Goodnight mister Clement, tonight was fun¡± and with that I got out of the car and waved at him before walking up to my porch.


    Maybe this is real. Maybe he could really be the one I can hold on to.

 Chapter 10 – Earth to move

    stuck inside my head


    like a song you can¡¯t forget


    EARTH TO MOVE- MAROON FIVE


    I walked up to my doorstep and rang the bell, after a few seconds of waiting, rattling keys was heard from the other side and the door was opened by the woman who gave birth to me.


    At that point Clement now started his engine and drove off while my mom stared at his moving vehicle.


    ¡± Where were you? and who was that?¡± she asked while standing with her hands on her hips and preventing me from going in.


    ¡± I don¡¯t know, plus it¡¯s cold outside and I¡¯m freezing ¡± I said and pushed passed her.


    ¡± Oh sorry about that¡± she said


    ¡± No need¡± and I began heading to the kitchen to fetch a ss of water but heard footsteps walk in.


    After clearing her throat she spoke up ¡°ehm.. did you enjoy your evening?¡±


    I didn¡¯t reply, I just reached up to the cab and brought out a ss cup.


    ¡± Who is he?¡± she asked again.Content property of N?velDra/ma.Org.


    Is this woman that blind to see that I don¡¯t want this conversation?


    ¡± Is he your boyfriend?¡±


    Okay that is thest straw.


    ¡± Why do you bother?¡± I crossed my arms over my chest and awaited her response.


    ¡°you¡¯re my child, the only one at that. If course I have to bother who she is spending her nights with¡±


    ¡± Really? I didn¡¯t realize¡± and I walked away towards the refrigerator to get a jug of water.


    ¡± So..? answer me!¡± she sounded on the verge of yelling, but who do I care. I ain¡¯t giving a reply. simple.


    Pouring a ss of water for myself I returned the jug and went up to my room. She just stood there dumbfoundedly and watched me pass.


    Good for you.


    I threw myself on my bed and reminisced on my day. Not as bad as usual.


    And the best part is, I made a friend. A real human and not a figment of my imagination.


    I couldn¡¯t just get that thought out of my head. And he even believes in pinky swears.


    That thought made me smile but my thinking was cut short by the ringing of my cellphone.


    I peeped at the caller and saw it was none other than my far away friend.


    ¡°hello?¡± I called in


    ¡°hey girl, how was your day? tell me all about it¡±


    She sounded a lot more enthusiastic than usual which just got me a little scared.


    ¡°err, are you at home?¡± I needed to be sure of her stability.


    ¡± Of course, in bed now. Any problem?¡±


    ¡± No, none at all, so about my day¡± and I told her everything. down to the pinky swears that still got me blushing a little.


    ¡°hmm, seems interesting to me¡± she said and I can imagine her googly dreamy eyes staring intently at me.


    ¡± It was¡± I was smiling but then a thought came to me and I stopped.


    ¡°Megan do you think I should trust him?¡±


    ¡± Trust who? hotty hero?¡± she questioned.


    I gave a lightugh, mehn I¡¯ve beenughing a lot today.


    ¡°yeah, hotty hero, do you think I should?¡±


    There was a short silence that means she was thinking.


    What if she says no, she¡¯s the outspoken one, she probably knows the characters of every personality in the world.


    ¡± Do you want to trust him?¡±


    ¡°huh?¡± was she asking me that? she¡¯s invariably asking me my question.


    ¡°Iris, trusting someone is based on two things, your heart and your instincts. And to which I¡¯m none, so you trusting him depends solely on you¡±


    ¡°but I need your advice¡± I really need it more than she can tell.


    ¡± I could end up saying no and you still go ahead to trust him, I can also say yes and you still avoid him. My thoughts do not count, it¡¯s yours¡±


    My thoughts? since when do my thoughts matter?


    ¡°please¡± I was begging because i don¡¯t wanna make a choice I would regret and hate myself the more.


    ¡°Okay, let¡¯s analyze the pro¡¯s and con¡¯s. while you were with him were you happy?¡±


    Aside from the times I thought he wanted to be rid if me yeah.


    ¡°yeah¡±


    ¡°Did he make you sad?¡±


    ¡°his actions kinda did but he made up for it¡± remembering the way he gripped the steering wheel.


    ¡°But are you holding them against him?¡± Jeez when did she be so smart?


    ¡°No, no I¡¯m not¡± shaking my head even though I know fully well she can¡¯t see me.


    ¡± Lastly, do you wanna see him again? don¡¯t forget your pinky swear¡± and we bothughed at that.


    He really is someone not worth forgetting. I think I¡¯ll take that risk.


    ¡°Yeah, I wanna see him again.¡± and I was smiling.


    ¡± So, there¡¯s your answer. Go for it babe¡±


    ¡°Thanks a lot, I owe you one¡± I told her and she blew one of her kisses into the phone.


    ¡°I know, I¡¯m amazing¡±


    Her statement reminded me of Clement¡¯s words and I caught myself smiling again.


    ¡± What have you been up to?¡± it¡¯s my turn to ask.


    ¡°hmm¡­ my mom¡¯s nning to get married again¡±


    Then there was silence. I suck at this.


    ¡± Are you okay with it?¡± something finally popped into my head and I said it.


    ¡± No, not really. I mean it¡¯s a guy she met in one of her travels and got engaged beforeing home. Plus the man is a widower and he has a son, so I have a brother and a dad I¡¯m yet to set eyes on. no biggie¡± I¡¯m sure she shrugged at this statement.


    ¡± They¡¯re not your brother or father yet, i mean your mom isn¡¯t married to them yet¡±


    ¡± Yeah, but she would soon be. So the earlier I ept the better ¡±


    ¡± I know your mom though, she¡¯s been single for quite some time now since your dad left. It¡¯s really been five years, I¡¯m sure she wouldn¡¯t get the wrong family¡±


    I tried to sound encouraging, because since her dad walked out of their family, her mother has been the best. Picking up on foreign trading that has her travelling round the world and meeting dozens of people but falling in love once is something to let have a try.


    ¡± Hmm¡­ I guess you¡¯re right. I just wanna meet them. Youu know, and have that first impression aspect¡±


    ¡°Don¡¯t stress up. Just be positive¡±


    ¡± Thanks Iris, I really needed that talk¡± and she yawned, so loudly I wondered if her mom was awoken.


    ¡± Goodnight, baby girl. I need my beauty sleep¡±


    Iughed at her chic-iness and wished her back.


    Ending the call I changed out if my clothes afterwards brushed my teeth. I sat at the edge of my bed and took my drugs. Late I know but I can¡¯t skip it.


    Snuggling up I saw myself getting all tired and my breaths getting heavy.


    And soon fell asleep with one thing on my mind.


    Or person.

 Chapter 11- Broken glass

    ? I¡¯m just avoiding you like


    broken ss.


    There are no winners when


    The sky is cast. ?


    BROKEN GLASS- SIA


    It¡¯s the third day after my injury. The day I had to get rid of this bandage.


    I walked down the hallway to the nurse¡¯s office and knocked twice on the wooden door.


    e in¡± I heard the tiny voice of miss Joanne say, and I gripped the handle to let myself in.


    She was busy writing away records with her sses hanging at the bridge of her nose. She sat at her tiny desk that was always cleared and neat except for the little stethoscope set that sat at the edge of the table that made contact with the wall.


    ¡°good morning miss Joanne¡± I greeted and she raised her head, before a lovely smile graced her lips.


    Why is she so happy to see me this morning? Ain¡¯t I like a burden or something?


    ¡°Iris, how have you been?¡± still smiling and her eyes inspecting me for more injuries. I¡¯m sure she found none.


    Because she can¡¯t see the bloodied bruise on my back from yesterday when Hunter rubbed my bare back against his car that had been sitting under the sun for hours.


    ¡°I¡¯m alive, what about you?¡± I answered and took a seat across her.


    ¡± Well good if I may say; have you been taking your drugs?¡±


    ¡°Yes ma¡¯am, four days to go¡± and sheughed at the response.


    ¡± Counting I see, don¡¯t worry, even as a nurse I still do that¡± and she finished her words with a wink.


    She stood up and went to her shelf of drugs and brought out a pair of scissors, a little ball of cotton wool and a bottle I think contains alcohol.


    ¡± Have a seat on the bed will you?¡± she asked and I got up from the chair to do as she requested.


    She approached me and used to scissors to cut off the bandage. After a few seconds of observing my head, she lifted the hair that cascaded over my left cheek and observed some more.


    Dabbing and cleaning the spot with the alcohol drained cotton wool, she handed me a mirror to see my reflection.


    I technically ran away from my mirror this morning because I was scared of seeing what I looked like, now here they are handing me a mirror.


    I can never get away from somethings can I?


    I collected it from her hand and took a look at my face. A slight string of sanity that held me together prevented me from screaming.


    My eye bags had gotten worse than usual, I look like i just cried over my mascara and it rested below my eyes. My hair was as messy as a bush could look. My dried and chapped lips was nothing to write home about, I tried licking it to look more presentable and it slightly worked.


    ¡± The stitch is almost healed, avoid much pressure and you¡¯re good¡± miss Joanne pulled me out of my thoughts.


    Stitch? which stitch?


    Then it hit me. I lifted the hair that covered my forehead minutely and saw it.


    A stitch that ran somehow horizontally at the line of my hairs barrier. A scar.


    I finally have a permanent scar from all my sorrows. I finally have something that will haunt me.


    I dropped the mirror on the bed and got down.


    ¡°Take¡± she said, handing me a tube cream.¡± Rub this on the scar, it would help hasten healing and possibly clearing of the stitch¡±


    I nodded, collected the ointment and walked straight out of the office.


    Although my mind was upied by the current stitch on my head, it couldn¡¯t miss finding Hunter in the hallway.


    I saw him talking to a girl a few feet away, so adaptively I turned to follow the other route.


    It¡¯s longer but it¡¯s safer.


    I¡¯ve been avoiding him since yesterday afternoon because I still have this throbbing feeling in my back and another blow isn¡¯t necessary.


    I arrived at my locker but stopped when I noticed a redhead opening the locker next to mine.


    This face is one I haven¡¯t seen before.


    After putting in her lockbo she turned to face me.


    ¡°Hi, I¡¯m Meredith¡± and she waved.


    I was awestruck. This girl is as pretty as an angel. Heart shaped face and hazel cat shaped eyes. A small but pointed nose. Plump lips that look so full tainted with a little pink lipstick.


    I almost started doubting my taste in gender.


    But here stands before her an ugly girl with a scar.


    I waved back to her and tried opening my locker. Now I feel really shy because a beautiful girl is standing by my side. A way for people topare and contrast.


    ¡°err- I¡¯m new here and just uhm¡­ wondering if you could help me around?¡± she added.


    ¡± You want me to help you?¡± my confusion in these few days has been beyond my limit.


    Why me out of every single person in this hallway.


    you¡¯re her locker mate dummy.


    Oh.


    ¡± Yeah, I don¡¯t know where my next ss is¡±


    ¡°uhm¡­ well¡­ err..¡± Am I stuttering? she¡¯s a freaking girl!!


    ¡± What ss do you have right now?¡± I finally said something.


    ¡± uh-¡± she started and brought out a piece of paper from her bag. ¡°AP English¡±


    That was the exact ss I had too.


    ¡± It¡¯s down the hallway, two turns left, second ss¡± I described the way and returned my attention to my locker.


    ¡± Oh, well okay¡± she said, but she was still standing there.


    I on the other hand brought out my Text for the ss and shut my locker.


    ¡± Soo¡­¡± she started saying as soon as I turned around while she was bncing back and forth between the balls of her feet, ¡°what ss do you have now?¡±


    I raised a brow at her. Was that why she waited? to ask me that??


    ¡°AP English too.¡± I kept a blunt expression to know where this is headed.


    ¡°Do you mind walking with me?¡±


    And then I lost it. She¡¯s not embarrassed to be seen with me??


    ¡± Me? you wanna be seen with me?¡±


    ¡°Yeah, if it¡¯s okay with you I mean¡± and she shrugged.


    It¡¯s okay with me but not with the entire student body.


    ¡°You can¡¯t walk with me¡±


    ¡± Why?¡± now she was the one looking confused.


    ¡°I¡­ it¡¯s¡­ well¡­¡± how do I tell her I¡¯m a sore loser without looking like a sore loser.


    She tilted her head and waited for a response and the bell went off.


    ¡± Aren¡¯t you gonna be embarrassed to be seen with me?¡± I finally said something I thought of and still sounded pathetic.


    ¡± Why should I?, you don¡¯t look bad I mean¡± and she looked me from head to toe.


    I also had to do a double take on what I was wearing to confirm if my ck jeans and oversized pink rolling stones shirt had magically transformed into a hot summer gown.


    When I saw no difference I opened up again.


    ¡± You¡¯re pretty, you shouldn¡¯t be seen with me, I¡¯ll taint your image¡±


    ¡± I don¡¯t care how you look, I like you the way you are¡±


    I stared at her like she just spoke Dutch.


    ¡± Let¡¯s go to ss, shall we?¡± and she held my hand as we walked hand in hand to ss.N?velDrama.Org holds this content.


    We arrived into the ss and everyone was already seated.


    Including Hunter.


    He took the seat in the middle of the ss. I raised my head and looked at him but he was busy eye raping the redhead beside me.


    ¡± Let¡¯s sit at the back¡± Meredith whispered in my ear and I noticed thest two empty seats at the back. On the same row as Hunter. She turned to me and nodded.


    She started making her way to the back and I followed like a lost puppy, keeping my head down to the chair.


    I¡¯m almost there. Almost the-


    Then I tripped.


    I raised my head and held on to my sses to avoid losing them but I felt a feet stepping on my left hand.


    ¡°aah!¡± I shouted and the feet pressed harder.


    Seeing who was doing this was none other than Hunter I knew it was best to muffle the pain.


    ¡± Oh my goodness, Are you okay?¡± I saw Meredith make her way for me and Hunter¡¯s feet left my hand.


    ¡°yeah, I¡¯m good. I just slipped¡±


    She nodded and helped me get up. We walked to our seat and sat as soon as the teacher came in.


    So much for avoiding Hunter.

 Chapter 12- Cold

    ? I don¡¯t understand why


    you¡¯re so cold to me with


    every breath you breathe ?


    COLD ¨C MAROON FIVE FT FUTURE


    ss went ahead as usual, people snickering andughing at me when they deemed it time, others ogling and giggling at Hunter, the teacher giving us work to do then dozing off.


    The only thing odd about this ss was Meredith tried making conversations with me, but I ended up responding with only nods or smiles that look like grimaces.


    It¡¯s really awkward to have someone try to talk to you, when all you¡¯ve been used to is being insulted or hit.


    I know am putting her in a really tight position right now because the smile she had on her face is faltering and turning more into an annoyed expression.


    I kept my gaze down to finish the work given to us when she slipped a paper unto my table.


    I bent my head to peep at her in front of me but she kept on looking ahead like she didn¡¯t just give me something.


    I picked it up and opened it to view whatever message it contained. Unsurprisingly, she wrote down something.


    I know the guy in ck tripped you, plus I also saw him step on your hand.


    why did you deny that when I asked you?, we could have easily reported you know?


    Ha! report. It even sounds more hrious when someone else says it.


    Tell me something I haven¡¯t tried and I owe you my ramen tonight. I picked up my pen and in little annoyance, I scribbled a reply back to her.


    that isn¡¯t necessary, I can handle it. don¡¯t worry about him.


    And I sent the letter back to her by tapping on her shoulder.


    She only stretched out an arm and collected the paper. After a few seconds she slid it back to me and I read it again.


    okay, but is it usually like this around here? all the maltreatment and stuff?


    Is it? no it isn¡¯t it¡¯s just to a certain someone that is sitting directly behind you.


    No it¡¯s not. It just happens to some people around here.


    And I gave her the little letter back, that was how our conversation began back and forth.


    Some people?? what did they do? what did you do?


    Apparently, nothing. they just find it fun you know. It¡¯s no big deal.


    they just find it fun? do you mean they actually bully people around here? does he bully you?


    no.


    Is that the reason you don¡¯t want to be seen with me? because you¡¯re being bullied and afraid you¡¯ll taint my image??


    I can¡¯t reply that cause she is correct. And she has finally figured out I¡¯m incapable of helping myself.


    The bell went off with students scrambling out of the ss and she turned to re at me.


    ¡± They bully you!?¡± she almost shouted and I¡¯m shocked that the entire ss didn¡¯t whip around to detect the source of the scream.


    ¡°shhh¡­ keep it down¡± I cooed and silently searched to be sure Hunter was no longer in the vicinity.


    ¡°answer me!¡±


    ¡°why?¡±


    ¡°uhm¡­ because you¡¯re my friend and if they hurt you it isn¡¯t nice¡±


    This friend word again?


    ¡°I¡¯m y-your friend?¡±


    ¡°yeah, I mean I consider you one¡±


    I looked at her like she just grew the snakes of Medusa. We met few minutes ago and she¡¯s calling me a friend?


    Possibly it¡¯s because she¡¯s lonely on her first day of school, when she¡¯s ustomed here I¡¯d be on my own.


    As usual.


    ¡°why?¡±


    ¡°why I consider you a friend?¡±


    I nodded.


    ¡± Do you always consider yourself that inferior? Is that how you really are around here? you don¡¯t have any friends?¡± She asked with a hint of pity in her tone.


    I lowered my head in shame. Apparently it¡¯s very transparent but must they always point out that I¡¯m a loser?


    ¡°er- you know, you never told me your name¡±


    ¡°I-Iris¡±


    ¡± Okay, Iris how long has this been going on?¡±


    ¡°it¡¯s nothing, let¡¯s go¡± I got up and picked my bag after I noticed we were the only ones left here.


    ¡± Oh.. Alright, sorry if you don¡¯t wanna talk about it¡± a crestfallen feature graced her beautiful face.


    ¡± There¡¯s nothing to talk about.¡± I grumbled and sooner, we left the ss together.


    ¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á¡Á


    The rest of the day went by¡­ okay? , No Hunter for now. Maybe what he did in ss today was enough for him?.


    I met Clement in the cafeteria during lunch. We saw each other from a distance and he just smiled at me then he mouthed the word ¡®FRIEND¡¯ at me.


    The gesture was so funny, that I almost smiled in public. How foolish would that be? So Hunter can see me happy and find a reason to undo it.


    Right now school¡¯s over and I¡¯m by my locker with Meredith. She¡¯s chatting away about the queen bee in her former school and how much she hated her.


    I¡¯m not really one to get involved in discussions with, literally I¡¯m the girl you talk about so I was finding this beyond awkward.


    That didn¡¯t stop some thoughts and suggestions on what she was saying from popping into my head now and then.


    After much contemtion with my inner self, I decided to speak.


    Clearly about to contribute to the conversation when I saw Himing towards us then I froze.


    She observed my change in demeanor and turned to see what I was staring at.


    He walked so graciously for someone who is going to inflict pain on me very soon. With his signature smirk and an aura that spelt your definite bad boy, he kept oning.


    A few steps nearer and he got close to us but surprised me by facing Meredith and pushing me into the nearest locker.


    Ouch! my back.


    But I dare not say that out loud. I even had more things to bother about right now. Like is he gonna pick on her cause of me? Or is he gonna ask her to date him like he did with Vicky so I¡¯d be alone.


    Sadly, thetter seemed a whole lot safer.


    ¡°You seem new¡± Hunter spoke with a voice I¡¯m familiar with.


    The same voice he used to take away Vicky. He¡¯s going to take Meredith too.


    At least she¡¯ll be safe. I¡¯ll just be alone again.


    Not like it¡¯s something different or odd.


    ¡± Uh, thanks captain obvious¡± she spat back.


    Wait! howe I¡¯m the only one trembling here?


    ¡°hmm¡­ fiesty. I like it¡± and he shamelessly ran his eyes down her figure, lingering on her slender legs.


    ¡± I don¡¯t give a damn what you like¡±


    ¡°I¡¯m Hunter Brooks¡±


    ¡± And the ape shit has a name¡±


    ¡± Excuse me?¡± Hunter looked direly aghast with her reaction to him, it may even be the first time.


    But a tiny devil in me did a little jubtion within.


    ¡± Oh you¡¯re highly excused, I was busy by the way¡± and with that she turned back to her locker without an atom of care.


    Hunter on the other side stormed out of the premises.


    ¡± y-you turned him down.¡± yeah my voice must be shaky mustn¡¯t it?


    ¡°Meh¡± and she shrugged. That kind of brought a little smile to my face.


    Once she was done with whatever she was doing, she mmed her locker shut and turned to me.


    ¡± See you around¡± she called out as she started walking away. I nodded and she gave me a thumbs up sign.


    I hugged my book to my chest and started walking too.


    A few steps alone right now felt a little odd. Maybe Meredith is kinda interesting?


    I couldn¡¯t finish my thoughts as I was yanked by the hair and a hand covered my mouth, pulling me into the janitor¡¯s closet.


    I was mmed into the wall of the closet and flinched at the pain. I felt blood trickle from my bruise.


    Squinted my eyes to see who it was since the closet was pitch ck but when the person spoke I didn¡¯t need to think anymore.


    ¡± You saw that bitch talk bad to me and you did nothing!?¡±


    He was expecting me to speak?


    ¡°huh!? answer me!!?¡± he yelled again and I flinched because of the way his voice resonated in the room.


    It didn¡¯t help that I couldn¡¯t see him either.


    ¡°I d-didn¡¯t know-w I-I w-was m-meant to t-talk, a-am s-sorry¡±


    ¡°haha, and I forgive you for watching me get humiliated¡± his venous words were almost like ice down my spine.


    Even in darkness I couldn¡¯t still raise my head to look at him. This fear is really inbuilt.


    ¡°You¡¯re gonna pay you know¡± now his voice wasced with mischief.


    ¡°Turn around!¡± he ordered and being the whimp I am, I duly obeyed.


    Shaking in fear of what he is gonna do to me I heard the sniping of a scissors.


    ¡± I think it¡¯s time you showed our school the little tattoo I gave you yesterday don¡¯t you think?¡± I could feel his smirk right now.


    Even in the dark, his evil has an atmosphere to it.


    Curse my inability to see clearly. it would have been helpful in the closet.Content provided by N?velDrama.Org.


    ¡°p-please¡± I whimpered. My eyes now stinging from the iing flood of tears.


    ¡± Are you talking to me?¡± he barked and I knew better than to respond.


    When my silent whimpering was all that could be heard within the four walls, he continued.


    ¡± Good¡± was all he said and I heard the scissors once more, but this time I felt cool air on my back.


    ¡± Perfect, Cole let¡¯s bail¡± he said and I heard the door open and m shut.


    So he wasn¡¯t alone.


    I dropped on my knees to the floor and let the tears fall.


    Why is he always so cold to me??

 Chapter 13- Silence 2

    ? I¡¯ve found peace in your violence


    can show me there¡¯s no point


    in trying, I¡¯m that one


    and I¡¯ve been silent for so long ?N?velDrama.Org holds this content.


    SILENCE- MARSHMELLO FT KHALID.


    It¡¯s Saturday, and its my shift at Tucker¡¯s. Six to Ten PM is just the best time at this ce. Aside from the steady and slightly crowded nature of this building, every other thing seems cool.


    The first two hours of the shift I¡¯m behind the counter, thest two am waiting tables.


    I was by the counter, making sums of our profit so far, when I heard a voice I was too familiar with.


    ¡°And she works, tell me one more reason why I can¡¯t like you again?¡± Clement spoke while taking a seat directly in front of me.


    I on the other hand resembled the old red karaoke machine at the left corner.


    ¡°Iris?¡± calling me out of my red engrossed face.


    ¡°yeah¡±


    ¡°you¡¯re red again¡± then he smiled at me.


    ¡°you mustn¡¯t point that out all the time you know¡± Wow. I¡¯ve finally gotten a brave voice.


    ¡± Why? you look cute when you blush¡± he pouted at me.


    And I turned redder.


    ¡°err- what-t would you like to eat?¡± I asked him holding the jotting paper and pen in my hand whilst staring at my feet.


    A few seconds of silence and he hasn¡¯t said anything, I was beginning to wonder if he got angry because I cut his conversation short.


    I lifted my head to view him and he didn¡¯t look the slightest offended. In fact he looked¡­ Sly??


    ¡± I think I¡¯ll eat you, am I permitted?¡± he finally spoke up while leaning on the counter with his elbows.


    Are we back to this eating conversation again? I thought it was established that we aren¡¯t carnivorous?


    ¡°I¡¯m sorry to ask but, are you carnivorous?¡± Forgive me for prying but I had to confirm with whom I¡¯m dealing with.


    And then he did the expected.


    Heughed.


    Andughed.


    And kept onughing.


    So he is!


    ¡± How is it possible that you¡¯re in the 21st century, and believe eating humans is for animals?¡± he managed to blurt out in the middle ofughter.


    ¡°aye¡­ don¡¯t corrupt med here¡± Tucker walked up to us and stered a fake re at Clement.


    How do I know it¡¯s fake?


    Well because it¡¯s the same look he gives to me when he pretends to be angry that I¡¯m working overtime.


    Clement raised his two hands in surrender, stillughing he said


    ¡± She¡¯s damn to innocent, Tuck¡¯s¡±


    ¡°Tuck¡¯s?¡± I questioned the nickname I just heard from Clement. That¡¯s the first time someone¡¯s ever called Tucker that.


    ¡°Yeah, Ol¡¯ Clement here used to be a kid who came to y down at my ranch in Tennessee¡± Tucker exined.


    ¡°Tennessee?? you lived in Tennessee?¡± more questions, I know. I¡¯m inquisitive.


    ¡°Yeah, I do go down home sometimes but of recent I don¡¯t bother. Clement was my neighbor¡± Tucker continued


    ¡°Yup, I always go down with my cousin. Good old days¡± Clement added.


    ¡°How¡¯s our lovely kid by the way?¡± Tucker resumed the discussion.


    ¡°If by lovely you mean a living walking natural disaster, then yeah he¡¯s good¡± Clement finished up his talk that got both of themughing.


    ¡°Iris hun, get him a jumbo burger with a soda¡± Tucker said and I went into the back to get his order.


    A few minutester and I came out but Clement was all alone. Seems like Tucker¡¯s gone off.


    ¡± Here you go, the people behind said this order is mostly a take away¡± I handed him his packaged meal.


    ¡°ahh¡­ they never forget. You never told me you work here?¡±


    I forgot to mention that, please don¡¯t hate me.


    ¡°uhm.. you didn¡¯t ask?¡± oh my God, now he¡¯ll think am not grateful.


    Then he chuckled ¡°yeah, maybe it¡¯s my fault, just maybe¡± and he winked.


    ¡± When is your shift ending?¡± he continued


    ¡°by ten¡± and I nced to view the clock that read seventeen minutes past eight. Time to wait tables.


    ¡°I¡¯ll pick you up okay?¡±


    ¡°but-¡±


    ¡± Yeah, I¡¯ll see you too¡± without waiting for my argument, he walked out of the restaurant.


    And I smiled.


    ¡°Is he your boyfriend?¡± I jumped at Tucker¡¯s voice in my ear.


    ¡± What!? No. No!.¡± I answered a little too fast.


    ¡°I see¡± He smirked and handed me an apron. ¡± Go wait tables Missy¡± then pointing to a couple who had just finished their meal.


    I collected the apron and heard the chime of the bell indicating someone just walked in.


    ¡± Time to get busy¡± I said to myself.


    ¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã


    Twelve more minutes for my shift to be over and I was gathering up a few things.


    Dropping off thest pile of dirty tes in the sink, a co worker called out to me.


    ¡± Hey, handle table nine would you?st one for tonight¡± I nodded and picked up my jotter with a pen. Heading out I froze in my steps as beads of perspiration clouded my forehead.


    Table nine was Hunter and His friend Cameron.


    I¡¯m doomed.


    I walked grudgingly and slowly to their table with my head bowed. Chanting quick prayers for tonight to be over.


    must he follow me everywhere?


    ¡± Good evening and wee to Tucker¡¯s, how may I h-help you¡± I was literally vibrating on my feet.


    ¡± Oh, if it isn¡¯t my y thing? nice to see me isn¡¯t it?¡± Hunter said with amusement crawling all over his voice.


    But I didn¡¯t respond. I couldn¡¯t.


    Heck, I shouldn¡¯t.


    ¡°we¡¯ll have a bowl of spaghetti each. And make it hot¡± he continued.


    I scribbled their meal and ran to the back.


    They are thest table we have for today, survive them and I can make it home.


    Carrying their tray of food which I made sure was extra hot as they had demanded, I walked briskly to their table. Setting their te down and turning to make a run for it when he stopped me with a single word.


    ¡± Wait!¡±


    And Cameron just snickered augh under his palm.


    Hunter took a bite of his spaghetti and scrunched up his face.


    isn¡¯t it hot enough? maybe i should-


    There was no time to finish thinking as he poured his hot bowl of spaghetti all over my head.


    ¡± It¡¯s fuckin too hot, Cameron let¡¯s bail¡± and the two if them left the building just like that.


    While I had to treat the forming scald at the back of my palm. I picked up their tes and went back to the kitchen to wash up before going.


    ¡± What? who the hell did this to you?¡± The girl who had asked me to handle their table questioned as I approached the back room, attracting the attention of others.


    ¡± No need to panic, it¡¯s my fault¡± I replied.


    It has always been my fault.


    ¡± As if, we need to report this to Tucker, he can ban whoever is responsible¡± she argued again, almost ripping off her apron.


    ¡± I said no worries, I can handle it¡±


    I went into the changing room to put on my emergency clothes that I always bring in case of mishaps, and cleaned myself up.


    ¡± Ha, tell Tucker? I¡¯ve been telling people who I believe can help me and what difference does it make?. There¡¯s basically no point in trying¡±


    Using a tissue to wipe away the sauce from my face, I got out of the stall to walk home.

 Chapter 14- Pretending

    ? Yes I¡¯ve been thinking


    Yes I¡¯m pretending


    That i don¡¯t need your love ?


    PRETENDING- A BOOGIE WITH A HOODIE FT JESSE REYES.


    I walked out of the restaurant faster than I ever have in my whole life and started marching east, to my way home.


    I heard the honk of a car but didn¡¯t bother turning back. I don¡¯t need interruptions right now.


    Still marching with my tear streaked face I didn¡¯t care to look back when the horn was blown again.


    ¡°What is it!?¡± I stopped moving, turned around and recognized the red Audi.


    My suspicions only became clearer when he jumped out of his car and ran towards me.


    ¡± Hey did you forget I said I¡¯ll pick you up? ¡± he asked as he approached me but stopped once he saw my face ¡°what the- why are you crying?¡±


    I shook my head because the words couldn¡¯t just form in my head.


    ¡°Nothing? you¡¯re telling me nothing when you can¡¯t even speak!?¡± now he was shouting.


    finally got him angry didn¡¯t I?


    When I didn¡¯t give him a response, he sighed and gave me a one over look.


    I can¡¯t believe he actually came to pick me up.


    ¡± I¡¯m sorry,e on. Let¡¯s get you home¡± he took my hand and I jumped at the contact with my scalded skin.


    ¡± You¡¯re hurt?, who did this?¡± he asked again when he noticed the scald and little bruises on my wrist.


    I couldn¡¯t even think of what to say, so guess where I had been staring at? if you said the ground you guessed right.


    He sighed knowing fully well I wasn¡¯t going to speak and led me to the passenger seat of his car.


    I got in and squeezed myself to the door, to reduce the pounding headache I have from the hot food¡¯s impact on my head.


    He got into the driver¡¯s, started the ignition and began moving, as I tried to control my tears.


    ¡°Iris I thought we were friends now?¡± Clement spoke breaking the silence that had existed between us.


    But as usual I prefer not to talk back.


    ¡°Are you going to act like you can¡¯t hear me?¡±


    No response.


    ¡°for fucking sake, I¡¯m just trying to help you¡±


    Well I didn¡¯t ask for anyone¡¯s helpI¡¯ve been doing fine on my own and I will continue to survive.


    ¡°I don¡¯t need your help¡± that came out sharper than I nned for it to but it needed to be said.


    No one had helped me all this time, why is helping all of a sudden.


    And from the reflection on the ss I could see him ring at me.Belongs to ? n0velDrama.Org.


    ¡± Fine¡± and he returned to his driving with full concentration without saying anything else.


    Now I felt worse than before.


    ¡±¡±¡±¡±¡±¡±¡±¡±¡±¡±¡±¡±¡±


    After a few minutes of driving, we finally got to my house.


    I looked up to the building that is purely dark as there are no lights on. Mom and Dad are workingte tonight, so I¡¯ll be all alone.


    ¡°No one¡¯s at home?¡± He asked reminding me that I¡¯m still in his car.


    I shook my head and mumbled a thank you before climbing down.


    Walking towards the entrance while searching my purse for the keys, when I heard another car door close shut.


    Clement made his way to my side and stood by me as he watched me fish for my keys.


    I inserted the key into the lock and opened the door before turning to face him again.


    ¡°err-d-do you wannae in?¡±I¡¯m sounding dumb I know, but he might just be here to make sure that I didn¡¯t forget how to open the door.


    ¡°yeah, sure¡±


    And I pushed the door open and walked in, while waiting for him to do the same.


    Much to my dismay, he still stood outside of the house and was throwing me a wary look.


    ¡°Are you sure you want me toe in?¡± he asked me with a brow cocked upwards and I responded with a nod.


    He then stepped in and nced round the house, but not still taking a seat.


    I stared at him and he just stared back at me. None of us moving and I realized he was waiting for me to look away, so I did and looked at the floor.


    He sighed out loudly and asked ¡°where¡¯s your kitchen?¡±


    ¡°err-¡±


    ¡°I¡¯m not doing anything odd¡± raising his hands in surrender.


    I nodded again and led him into the kitchen. He stepped in and took my injured hand. I yelped at the pain but he didn¡¯t let go.


    Rather he took me to the sink and ran water over the scald.


    At first it stung and I tried pulling my hand away but he held it firmly in ce. And I began crying again.


    ¡± It hurts¡± I managed to say with my crooked voice and I watched the water run down the red streaks.


    ¡± Give it some time okay?¡± he said to me and I nodded briefly.


    And true to his word the pain subsided and I felt relief. He turned off the tap and turned to me.


    ¡± Go sit on the counter¡±


    Can I ever disobey? no¡­ so I did exactly as he demanded.


    ¡± Where¡¯s your first aid kit?¡± he asked after opening a few cupboards and saw mostly stationery and wares.


    I pointed to the highest shelf and he reached up to get it. In a few seconds, he came back to me and took my scalded hand that now had a removable skin on it.


    He took the scissors from the kit and cleaned it with some alcohol before cutting off the skin around the wound. Cleaning the scissors again, he put it back in the box, then applied penicillin on the open wound.


    ¡± Do you have a headache?¡± he asked and I nodded.


    He then left to get a ss of water and brought it with a pain reliever. I took it from him and swallowed while he returned the kit.


    He came back and was watching me closely, and I did the same to him.


    ¡± You smell like spaghetti¡± he said still watching me.


    ¡± Workce ident¡± I answered him and focused my attention on my hand.


    ¡± Take a shower and go to bed okay?¡±


    I raised my head at him and nodded again.


    ¡± Good¡± was thest thing he said before silence befell us. But I decided to speak.


    ¡°I said I didn¡¯t need your help¡±


    ¡°Did I tell you I was gonna listen?¡± he shrugged.


    ¡°You¡¯re supposed to. At least that¡¯s what friends do, right?¡± I reduced my voice at thest part so he won¡¯t hear me but unfortunately he did.


    ¡± No you¡¯re wrong, friends help each other even when the other person is pretending to be okay¡±


    ¡°I shouted at you¡± now I¡¯m literally sounding weak. His gesture is too much for someone like me.


    ¡°And it didn¡¯t care¡±


    ¡°Why are you helping me?¡± I asked with thest courage of words in me.


    ¡± Because I am your friend¡±


    And then I did what i never thought I could have done before.


    I pulled him into a hug.


    He didn¡¯t retreat, or squirm. He hugged me back. He held me so tightly like he assumed that I was going to slip away.


    And I felt something strange in me that I hadn¡¯t felt in a long time.


    I felt loved.


    I started sobbing unconsciously expecting him to push me away to avoid snot from rubbing all over his shoulder but he didn¡¯t.


    Instead he hugged me tighter.


    ¡°Why do you always hide things from me?¡± he muffled into my hair.


    Still sobbing I gave him a response to his question.


    ¡± I d-don¡¯t want to b-be a burden¡±


    He didn¡¯t speak immediately, it seemed like he was thinking of what to say.


    And in a while he finally said something.


    ¡°Don¡¯t ever pretend you¡¯re okay to me when you¡¯re not¡±


    Not pretend? That¡¯s gonna take a while to get used to.


    But it¡¯s worth the shot with him.


    ¡°okay¡± I whispered into his shirt and my cries slowing down.


    ¡± And don¡¯t ever pretend you don¡¯t need my help when you do¡± he ordered again.


    ¡°o-okay¡±


    ¡± Good¡± came hisst words and I had never felt such a relief with those four letters before.


    The night kept getting darker but we maintained this position for a while.

 Chapter 15- Heavy

    ? Am holding on,


    why is everything so heavy


    Holding on, there¡¯s so much


    more than I can carry ?


    HEAVY- LINKIN PARK FT KIIARA


    Clement left a few minutes ago, not before making sure I was okay.


    Right now I was tucked up in bed and gazing at my ceiling. Counting sheeps is meant to help me fall asleep but all I can see is the dainty sheeps dancing tango in my vision.


    i really really need this sleep, waking up before my rm has not been helpful at all.


    I gave a loud long sigh and continued.


    ¡°one sheep, two sheeps, three shee-¡± I was removed from my numerics by my specific ringtone for a specific person.


    Unknowingly, a smilended on my lips as I answered the phone call.


    ¡°Okay, so spill, how was your day?¡± and that was how she began the conversation.


    ¡± Youu call at really odd times you know¡± honestly, she always calls when something¡¯s happened.


    ¡°meh, it¡¯s instincts¡± I could even hear her shrug.


    ¡°oh- kay¡± I sarcastically said and I poured out everything to her.


    Every detail of my day.


    ¡± Wow ¡± was all she said after my rant.


    ¡± Wow?, did I do anything wrong? I shouldn¡¯t have hugged him should I? I¡¯m an idiot¡± I said pping my forehead with my palm, technically increasing my headache.


    ¡± Jeez, calm down, when I said wow, I meant, wow, do you realize you sound happy?¡±


    ¡°huh?¡±


    Happy?? was that what this feeling is about? happiness?Belongs to ? n0velDrama.Org.


    ¡°I mean, this is the happiest I¡¯ve ever heard from you since you left¡±


    ¡± Really? I¡¯m that miserable?¡± I asked evoking augh from her.


    ¡°Don¡¯t you feel different?¡± She asked with a tinge of happiness


    ¡°I have this weird feeling in my stomach that¡¯s making me feel like I¡¯ll soon give up my lunch¡±


    ¡°Gosh, are you that oblivious?, you¡¯re happy air head¡±


    ¡°I am?¡±


    Is she right? I¡¯m actually happy? after all these years of pain I don¡¯t even know how happiness feels like.


    ¡°heck yeah you are, and let me give you another info that will burst your bubble of happiness¡± she¡¯s beginning to sound really cunny.


    ¡°ehm¡­ should I be curious or I should act like I don¡¯t care?¡±


    ¡°you¡¯re a girl¡­ durh you¡¯re meant to be curious¡± she literally just rolled her eyes right now.


    ¡°okay, so¡­ tell me?¡± sheughed at my efforts again. Yeah¡­ I suck.


    ¡± Sweet sweet Iris, okay here it goes¡­ dramatic pause¡­ are you still there?¡±


    ¡°yes I am¡±


    ¡°alright¡­.. so I¡¯m traveling with my mom to see my new family¡±


    ¡°uh-okay, good for you¡± I tried to sound enthusiastic for her but that was not at all the bubble bursting happiness I expected.


    ¡°don¡¯t worry, with time you¡¯ll understand¡±


    ¡°alright then. Hey thanks for calling¡±


    ¡°are you crazy woman? I should be thanking you for answering my call¡±


    Iughed at her childishness and kept a little silent on the phone because I felt there¡¯s something I¡¯m forgetting to tell her.


    oh


    i forgot to mention Meredith to her.


    ¡°Megan? you still there?¡± I piped into the phone.


    ¡°yup and always at your service¡±


    ¡°Megan there¡¯s something I forgot to tell you¡± biting my lower lip and waiting for her reply.


    ¡°uhun, and that is?¡±


    ¡°I, I uh-, I met this girl, Meredith? yeah she¡¯s cool and all and she wants to be friends. I¡¯m not recing you, I mean if you tell me to forget about her I would-¡± babbling and she cut me off


    ¡°Iris?¡±


    ¡°yeah?¡± I¡¯m chewing on my five fingers right now.


    ¡°Meredith is a girl?¡±


    ¡°yeah?¡±


    ¡°and she wants to be friends?¡±


    ¡°uhun?¡±


    ¡± and you¡¯re enjoy herpany?¡±


    ¡± maybe¡±


    A few seconds of silence that almost killed me.


    ¡°Megan say something, please¡±


    And she screamed, she screamed so loud I actually thought I unknowingly put my phone on speaker.


    ¡°err- are you good?¡± please let her be okay.


    ¡°of course am good, Iris you¡¯re finally making friends and you¡¯re happy, why wouldn¡¯t I want that for you?¡±


    ¡°I thought you¡¯d feel I¡¯m recing you¡±


    ¡°recing me? Iris I have always had tons of friends but did anyone rece you?¡±


    ¡± I don¡¯t know, I¡¯m not there anymore ¡±


    ¡°well hear me when I say no. No freaking one did. So I believe the same for you.¡±


    ¡°You really trust me that much?¡±


    ¡± Of course I do, you¡¯ll always be my best friend baby girl¡±


    ¡± Thank you so much¡± I could cry right now but I know she wouldn¡¯t approve of it.


    ¡°You¡¯re wee love. hey I told you to hang in there didn¡¯t I?, I told you to hold on, no matter how much situations wanna make you lose it, you should hold on. And it finally paid off. You¡¯re finally happy¡± I¡¯m sure she¡¯s feeling like a proud mama bear at the moment.


    But I couldn¡¯t stop it anymore, a tear slipped and I chuckled into the phone while wiping the tear away.


    ¡°I am aren¡¯t I?¡± I asked


    ¡± Of course you are, and I¡¯m fucking proud of you¡±


    ¡± Goodnight Megan¡± I told her after letting out a yawn.


    ¡± Go to bed Penelope¡±


    ¡°wha-? that¡¯s not even my name¡±.


    ¡± I know, night sugar ¡±


    Iughed once more and ended the call.


    Her words resonated in my ear and I couldn¡¯t stop myself from smiling a bit.


    I held on and it paid off.

 Chapter 16- be alright

    ? you know thatBelongs to ? n0velDrama.Org.


    we gonna be alright,


    We gonna be alright ?


    BE ALRIGHT- ARIANA GRANDE FT MIGOS


    Another Monday has arrived, and another day to dread. I woke up as usual, earlier than my rm but today is different.


    Instead of an hour earlier, I had just fifteen minutes before the rm goes off.


    Shockingly, I don¡¯t feel tired like I normally do. I actually felt like I had restst night.


    odd.


    I turned around a bit in my bed and rolled onto the other side, but I hit something fluffy and itnded with a poof on the floor.


    I bent to pick it up and I saw a white fluffed up teddy bear with a pink bow on its neck and around it¡¯s head, holding a little heart that says ¡®we love you beary much¡¯


    I smiled remembering when I once had a teddy like this. I practically forgot it in ourst house before we moved here.


    so mom and dad still remember?


    well boo-hoo, it¡¯s a little toote to make up now.


    I picked up the teddy and set it on the bed as my rm finally rang.


    Finishing my usual morning routine of a shower and brushing my teeth, I went to peep at my reflection.


    My eye bags are somewhat lesser now and my eyes look livelier. The cigarette burn on my neck is almost healed because all that remains is the blood clot covering it.


    I turned around and raised my singlet to look at my back. Tiny blotches of pink, purple and ck here and there, but on a general note, the bruise is clearing up.


    I lifted my hand to observe the scald but I saw no scar at all. Clement¡¯s treatment actually worked, Is he aspiring to be a doctor or something?


    I should really ask him that when next we see.


    I¡¯m already anticipating to see him again.


    Lol.


    Then finally the only scar I was afraid to open. I took in a deep breath and raised my hair to behold the stitch.


    Still looks like the day I first saw it. No difference at all. I sighed and let down my hair. now am ready for school.


    I put on a white oversize top and a washed blue ripped jeans, brushed my hair to look presentable and headed downstairs.


    I saw my Mom and Dad eating bacon and eggs, but I was in no mood for food with them. I rushed to the fridge and picked up a pear, then set out.


    Mom and Dad said nothing to me, and that¡¯s good because if they feel a teddy is gonna atone for their sins, they¡¯re so wrong.


    ???????????????????????????


    I arrived at school with only three minutes to spare since I chose to go on foot.


    I was approaching my locker and saw Meredith closing her¡¯s.


    Remembering what Megan had said to me previously, I didn¡¯t stagger when I walked up to her.


    In fact, I was determined.


    ¡°hey¡± yeah, I started the conversation, points for me.


    ¡°uh, hi.. you seem chatty¡± she questioned. I don¡¯t me her though. I¡¯d be shocked too if it were me.


    ¡°Yeah.¡± I replied with a small smile ¡± You wanna head to ss?¡± I continued when I spotted a few students walking down the hall.


    ¡°do I even have a choice?¡± She jested and we bothughed as we interlocked our hands.


    ¡± To infinity and beyond!¡± She shouted as we began walking towards our first ss of the day.


    yeah, i could give this friendship stuff a try.


    ¡é¡é¡é¡é¡é¡é¡é¡é¡é¡é¡é¡é¡é¡é¡é¡é¡é¡é¡é¡é¡é¡é¡é¡é¡é¡é¡é¡é¡é¡é


    School¡¯s over and I just walked back to my locker with Meredith talking about this new guy she met.


    Should I tell you the most shocking part about it!?


    okay, here it goes.


    I actually listened.


    I really mean it, I listened from the beginning of her talk up to this moment but I never contributed though.


    ¡± Then he invited me to his party this weekend¡± she finalized with a little crease in her brows.


    ¡°he seems nice¡± I shrugged.


    i just contributed. mehn am good.


    ¡°yeah, I know but what do you advise? should I go for the party?¡± she asked me.


    ¡± You really need my word?¡± I questioned her with a squeaky voice.


    Was she really asking me to make a decision for her? since when did my thoughts count?


    ¡± Of course I do, that¡¯s what friends are for ¡± she answered bouncing up and down.


    FRIENDS . I think I could get used to that.


    ¡± What if I make a wrong choice for you? I mean I¡¯m human, I¡¯m bound to make mistakes.¡± I need further consideration before I do this.


    And she pouted.


    ¡± Then we¡¯ll sulk together¡± she piped up smiling and took hold of my arm.


    And I smiled. She¡¯s really willing to stay by me. I can do this.


    ¡°Okay, do you wanna go for the party?¡± asking to know how to head with this.


    ¡°hmmm¡­ yeah I do¡±


    ¡°Then go for it¡± I shrugged just a shoulder. A habit I developed when I¡¯m unsure of the advice I¡¯m giving.


    ¡± Thanks but uh-¡± she let go of my hand and scratched the back of her head ¡°there is one problem¡± she finished.


    Oh no. I knew she¡¯ll hate my advice. She didn¡¯t want to go and I just said the words she didn¡¯t need.


    ¡°I¡¯m sorry I-I..¡± I was apologizing but she mmed her hand over my mouth to shut me up.


    ¡± No, you did nothing wrong, I just wanted to ask if you¡¯ll like to go to the party with me, you know I needpany and all¡± her face turning a little pink.


    She¡¯s scared of asking me because she feels I¡¯ll turn her down?


    But that¡¯s what I¡¯m gonna do.


    I¡¯m a disappointment.


    She released my mouth and I took in a lung full of air to which she found amusing, meanwhile to me it was not. I was trying to calm my flying nerves.


    ¡± You want to be seen with me? at a party? I don¡¯t even have a dress¡±


    Maybe she would change her mind after this.


    ¡± You¡¯re the only friend I wanna be seen with, and as for the dress don¡¯t worry. I can handle it¡± she winked after whispering herst phrase.


    I let a genuine smile grace my lips and she smiled back.


    ¡± So would you apany me?¡± she asked again.


    ¡°um-, yeah I mean, what¡¯s there to lose?¡±


    ¡°Oh thank you, thank you, thank you!, I¡¯ll be at your house by six. we¡¯re gonna rock this¡± with a thumbs up she retreated and walked away, I believe to her home.


    I¡¯m going to a party.


    Wow. that feels good.


    Smiling I turned to my locker, opening it but someone jammed it shut.


    ¡°Well well, what has miss Shawn in a chirpy mood today?¡± Hunter leaned on my locker with a cocked brow.


    My instinct to admire the floor kicked in without a second thought.


    ¡± Are you ying dumb with me?¡± he barked at me.


    And as usual, now I had to give him an answer.


    ¡°N-no¡±


    ¡°So give me a response, why are you so happy?¡±


    I heard snickering andughing, that¡¯s when I raised my head and saw Cameron, Cole and Chance standing a few feet away.


    What a triple C sequence.


    ¡°N-nothing¡±


    ¡°Nothing!? you want me to believe that a lowlife like you found a reason to be happy and it¡¯s nothing?¡± he shouted while getting closer into my face, causing me to shake in fright.


    ¡°Please d-don¡¯t hit me¡± whimpering, hoping he would have mercy.


    ¡± Oh, I really don¡¯t have the energy right now, but I came to show you a little something I found¡± he tilted my head up to look him straight in the eyes, and his ice cold blue eyes stared deep into my soul freezing every single part in me.


    ¡°Chance, hand me our little gift¡± he said taking hold of my left hand and extended his free one to Jake.


    Jake put his hand into his back pocket slowly and brought out something that glinted in the light.


    A Razor.


    My tears broke lose because I could imagine a million things they can do with that razor, and showing it to me for advertisement is not one of them.


    ¡± So we were walking down the hallway and this caught our attention, but we didn¡¯t know if it was sharp enough so we decided to ask you. do you think it¡¯s sharp?¡± his venomous voice draining every single blood in me.


    ¡± I asked you a question, do you think it¡¯s sharp!?¡± he yelled at me and it echoed down the hallway.


    Is no one really around to help me now?


    ¡°y-yes, yes, it is¡± I muttered while looking at his expensive ck swede shoes.


    ¡°hmm, I don¡¯t think it is, let me give it a try, Chance?¡± and Chance handed him the razor as his grip on my arm tightened.


    ¡°Please, please don¡¯t, please am begging you, I¡¯ll do anything, I¡¯ll leave this school just- aahhhh!!!¡± my pleas fell on deaf ears as he pressed the razor deep into my wrist and drew a line across.


    My blood dripped from the cut to the floor and a little smeared on his hand.


    ¡°eww, get your blood off me¡± letting me go, he rubbed his stained hand all over my white shirt.


    I fell to the ground and tried applying pressure on my wrist to stop the blood, but that was of no use. The pain just worsened on contact.


    And I, being the weakling that I am, cried my eyes out.


    ¡± Well I think it¡¯s sharp enough, thanks for the help Iris¡± Hunter said throwing the razor at a distance.


    I said nothing but just gripping at my hand and trying to control my sobs.


    Hunter yanked me by the hair and shouted into my face ¡°I said thanks you idiot, what are you supposed to say!?¡± pulling my hair till i was up on my feet.


    ¡°aaahh!! You¡¯re wee¡± I said in between tears.


    He threw me back to the ground and muttered a goodbefore stalking off.


    Still crying, I maintained my position as I watched my own blood drain from my body.


    ¡°hey Iris I forgot my b-what the fuck happened to you?¡± Meredith¡¯s voice got me looking up as she scrambled to my side.


    I was still sobbing uncontrobly as she helped me get up.


    ¡°let¡¯s get you to the nurse¡± she said rubbing my back in a circr pattern.


    She guided me slowly to my feet and led me towards the school clinic.


    ¡°don¡¯t worry, you¡¯re gonna be alright¡± she whispered into my ear.


    I can only hope.

 Chapter 17- somebody

    ? The only thing


    that I can¡¯t afford


    is to lose myself


    trying to be somebody,


    Somebody ?


    SOMEBODY- CHAINSMOKERS FT DREW LOWE.


    After a visit to the nurse, I left with just a little cast on my wrist. Heading down the hallway out to the school entrance with Meredith walking by my side. There is a really heavy silence between us and I know she wants to say something, but I on the other hand isn¡¯t in the mood to speak.


    As we stepped outside the building, our faces were grazed by the cool wind blowing around.


    ¡°so¡­.¡±


    i knew she was going to start something.


    ¡°Are you gonna tell me what happened? or are we gonna pretend like you aren¡¯t hurt?¡± Meredith asked but not moving her gaze from scanning the parking lot.


    And can you guess my reply?


    oh yes, i didn¡¯t answer.


    ¡°Iris? did you hear me? or are you just blocking me out?¡± she asked again now turning to me.


    I raised my head to look at her and I saw her eyes filled with concern. She is really bothered about me, but even if I do tell her what exactly can she do?


    ¡°please talk to me¡±


    If she keeps talking like this I¡¯m gonna cry for sure.


    She let out a loud sigh that blew out of her mouth like a puff of cloud.


    yeah.. that cold!


    ¡°I know we just met, and you can¡¯t really trust me, but you don¡¯t really expect me to behave like I don¡¯t care when I do, do you?¡± wearing a saddened expression she voiced out her mind. I guess I¡¯m really hurting people here aren¡¯t I.


    But what if I tell her and she considers me weak and walk away?


    That thought alone was enough to make me feel inferior and tear my view away from her to the floor.


    ¡°no matter what you tell me, I won¡¯t judge you¡± sheid her hand on my shoulder and I think that was what gave me the courage to speak up.


    ¡°you promise?¡± I whispered.


    ¡°I promise¡±


    After a life long sigh, I still stared downwards and began speaking.


    ¡°it¡¯s Hunter¡± I think the way I whispered this, is below human hearing level.


    ¡°Hunter? again?, does he bully you?¡± she¡¯s talking like she¡¯s trying to get information from an emotionally abused kid.


    Well, to answer her question didn¡¯t need words because I think she could tell from my silence.


    ¡°why haven¡¯t you said anything about it?¡± she continued asking


    ¡°I have, but no one did anything¡± no one at all.


    ¡°friends?¡±


    I nodded.


    ¡°teachers?¡±


    nodded again.


    ¡°principal?¡±


    more nodding.


    ¡°parents?¡±


    That word was the knife to cut thest string of strength I had to stop me from crying, but now I couldn¡¯t help it.


    Thinking of my parents in this case, I feel they are by far the worst betrayal I could have ever received. Choosing money over me was the proof of the kind of love they had for me.


    I nodded really slowly, and Meredith pulled me into a hug.


    ¡°oh, you poor thing, don¡¯t worry, I got you. I always will¡±


    And I nodded into her neck trying to maintain my tears while she rubbed my back gently and held me close.


    ::::::


    After much convincing, Meredith finally got me into her car to take me home.


    I gave her my address and she happily epted it, as she would also be needing it for Friday.


    We were driving in silence, but not an awkward one. It was a reallyfortable one with the radio ying Happy by Pharrell Williams at a low tempo.


    But it was cool though.


    Time to time, Meredith would nce at me with a questioning look on her face.


    she always has something to say. I wish I was more like that.


    Well, she¡¯ll probably have a million things to say since i just poured out the thing that bothered me the most to her.


    And to be honest, it feels good. like a weight off my shoulder.


    Few more seconds of silence and she broke the bottle.


    ¡°you know, I don¡¯t have your phone number¡±


    I turned to her and saw her giving me a faint smile. I¡¯m sure she sees me as a helpless case and is willing to bail so as not to be tagged with a nitwit.


    ¡°I und-derstand-d if y-you don¡¯t wanna h-hang out anymore, I¡¯m a weak, sick, stupid¡­ I¡¯m just..¡± I didn¡¯t even know how to exin myself, so I just faked augh at the end, hoping to find amusement in the fact that I just lost a friend.


    But she didn¡¯tugh back.


    ¡°Iris?¡±


    ¡°y-yeah?¡±


    ¡°I¡¯m not going anywhere¡±Content property of N?velDra/ma.Org.


    ¡°you aren¡¯t?¡± I¡¯m shocked.


    ¡°yes I¡¯m not, and you¡¯re not stupid, you¡¯re an A ss student. You¡¯re not sick because you aren¡¯t a psycho. And most of all, you¡¯re not weak. Heck you¡¯re the strongest person I know¡±


    ¡°Are you just saying this to make me feel good?¡± or rather is she nuts?


    ¡°no I¡¯m not, you¡¯re a girl who¡¯s been through a whole damn lot, yet you¡¯re still standing strong. Fuck everyone else Shawn, I admire you¡±


    I smiled, I really, literally just smiled.


    ¡°but I do have one question¡±


    oops, and herees the ¡®I¡¯m disappointed in you¡¯ part.


    ¡°uhun?¡± fingers crossed.


    ¡°why didn¡¯t you ever stand up to him? you know like revenge or talk back?¡± I wonder how she can be talking about revenge on Hunter and still have full focus on the road.


    Actually, why didn¡¯t I ever talk back or revenge?.


    Wait a minute.


    I did try to act back when he recently began his acts on me, but he had always been stronger so he always hit back harder.


    So I literally got tired of trying.


    Plus, I see violence as irrational, so why exert it for my own freedom?


    That¡¯s it!


    I never fought back because I believed it was wrong.


    mehn, i sound stupid.


    But that¡¯s who I am, no matter how I try, I can¡¯t change that fact about me.


    I can¡¯t afford to lose myself trying to be somebody.


    ¡°I didn¡¯t fight back because that¡¯s not who I am¡±


    jeez, that came out confident.


    Maybe a little too confident. Even proud?


    She¡¯ll think I¡¯m an egomaniac and throw me right out of her car.


    I bit my lower lip, and waited for her response. And she broke into a broad smile.


    ¡°Miss Iris Shawn, I fucking admire you¡± She finally looked at me since the beginning of our ride. And her face portrayed one thing.


    Pride.


    She¡¯s proud of me. Despite all my ws and mistakes she¡¯s really proud of me.


    This fluttering feeling is back in my stomach again.


    that means I¡¯m happy.


    I smile danced on my lips and Meredith noticed it. She gave a slight chuckle before talking again.


    ¡°Now you better give me your phone number, or I¡¯ll divert my admiration to Zac Efron¡± throwing me a fake re.


    And I¡­


    I felt happy.

 Chapter 18- No broken hearts

    ? No broken hearts in the club


    No tears in the club


    cause we gon¡¯ get it


    popping tonight ?


    NO BROKEN HEARTS- BEBE REXHA FT NICKI MINAJ.


    Friday is finally here and Meredith has been smiling like a clown all day. Especially since she has been anticipating seeing me in a gown.


    She¡¯s dropping me off at home, since I walked to school today.


    Again.


    And she already has her agenda for the night.


    ¡°Then we¡¯re gonna drink, and dance and flirt¡± wiggling her brows at me when saying thest part.


    ¡°eww, I don¡¯t drink¡± I had to make that clear.


    Then she fake gasped and ced a hand over her heart.


    ¡°You mean to say sixteen years on earth has been a waste?¡±


    hmm, she sure can act.


    ¡°You¡¯re exaggerating¡± I rolled my eyes at her.


    ¡°The god of tequ would be so pissed with you. hmmmph¡±


    honestly, now she¡¯s faking anger? someone get me a Grammy.


    wait!? what in the world is tequ?


    ¡°what¡¯s a tequ?¡± I asked her with a cocked brow. really, what is it? never heard of that before.


    More dramatic gasps from her and she ced the back of her hand over her forehead.


    ¡°Am I still alive? Grandpa is that you?¡± she said in a weak voice.


    ¡°err- are you okay?¡± I shook her shoulder. You can never tell. She could really be dying.


    ¡°You just touched me! that means I¡¯m alive. And I¡¯m alive on a in which someone is asking me what is a tequ.¡±


    can someonee and shoot me right now? I think I justmitted a taboo by not knowing what a err- ter is?


    What a way to prove I belong to the weirdos carnival.


    ¡°I¡¯m sorry I shouldn¡¯t have- ouch¡± I¡¯m honestly trying to apologize and she just smacked my arm.


    ¡°Don¡¯t you ever apologize to me, ever again. Got that?¡± ring at me I nodded.


    ¡± Great now where was I?¡± I ced my full focus on her. maybe I could learn a thing or two.


    cing her left hand on her chin to think and her right hand controlling the steering wheel, she finally remembered.


    ¡°Alright, a tequ is- why is there a sexy soul on yourwn?¡±


    I didn¡¯t understand a dime of what she just said.


    If someone made a bet on my confusion at this point they¡¯ll possibly be millionaires.


    ¡°uhm-¡± no words, really nothing to tell her that she just made absolutely no sense.


    But she grabbed my face and made me look forward. It was only then I realized I had gotten home.


    Soon enough, I spotted her confusion.


    The familiar Red Audi was parked right in front of my house and an effortlessly sexy looking Clement was leaning against the car, with his attention on the phone he was pressing.


    With a navy green short sleeve top and ck skinny jeans, to say he looked hot was an understatement. A few strands of hair draping on his face glistening in the sun like golden strings. The muscles of his lean body on perfect disy like a carved out magazine novel, he-


    ¡°uhun, when you¡¯re done drooling over him, you kindly exin why Dn McConnel is waiting for you¡± using her hand to shut my mouth that I just noticed was ajar while admiring Clement.


    wait, did she just call him Dn?


    ¡°what did you say his name was?¡± wiping my mouth with my hand incase of any stray saliva


    ¡°Dn McConnel? you know popr guy at school, sexy running back of our schools football team, really hot, all girls wanna date him, all guys wanna be him¡± her tone sounded more like she just said the word ¡®durh¡¯ and she shrugged.


    Howe I didn¡¯t know all if this and I¡¯ve been in this school way longer than she has.


    So I¡¯ve never attended any school extracurricr. sue me.


    But his name is Dn? has he been lying to me?


    ¡± You didn¡¯t know, did you?¡± Meredith pulled me out of my thoughts, narrowing her eyes at me.


    ¡± N-no, what¡¯s his full name?¡± he couldn¡¯t have lied just to be close to me, could he?


    ¡°Dn Clement McConnel, any problem?¡± she asked turning off the engine of her car.


    ¡°oh, nothing¡± I let out a sigh of relief, ¡°he only told me his name was Clement¡±


    ¡°so, it is certain, he¡¯s waiting for you. Why¡¯s he outside?¡± she turned her gaze back to Clement who was still typing away on his phone.


    ¡°No one¡¯s home¡±


    ¡°and he waited, wow. who is he to you?¡± now she¡¯s wiggling her brows again.


    why does she keep doing that? is her forehead itchy?


    ¡°he¡¯s a.. uh¡­ friend?¡± would he be okay with people knowing we¡¯re friends?


    ¡°oh, a friend. and he¡¯s a boy.¡±


    ¡°yeah?¡± of course he¡¯s a boy is she blind?


    ¡°So he¡¯s like¡­ your boy-friend¡± I can barely see her eyeballs with the way her eyes are narrowed.


    ¡± Yes- wait! n-no, no, no he¡¯s not¡± I just realized where she was headed.


    Gosh, is it just me or is it getting hotter in here?


    ¡°Yup, and the way you¡¯re red is a confirmation, you naughty girl¡± with the way she¡¯s smiling, I can actually count her entire set of teeth.


    I groaned and got out of the car, walking up to Clement with Meredith¡¯sughter trailing behind.


    ¡°hi¡± I waved when I was a few feet away taking his mind off his phone.


    ¡°hey, where have you been?¡± now his eyes narrowed ¡± and why do you look flushed?¡±


    ¡°I uhm¡­¡± thinking of what to say when the devils voice piped up


    ¡°hey, I¡¯m Meredith¡± she stretched forth a hand for a handshake and he took the hand.


    ¡°I know you, we take gym ss together right?¡± he asked her while I¡¯m trying to breathe to restore my oxygen and color.


    She nodded vigorously as they let each other¡¯s hands go and an idea popped into my head.


    ¡°You never told me your name is Dn¡± I crossed my hands over my chest.


    ¡°How did you find out?¡± he questioned back, with a raised brow


    ¡°Someone told me¡± now my hands had dropped to my sides.


    He stole a quick nce at Meredith who in turn shed him a million dor smile.


    damn she¡¯s pretty.


    he might begin to take interest in her.


    not like it bothers me but¡­


    He returned his gaze to me.


    ¡°Well I told you it¡¯s Clement and that¡¯s not a lie¡± he shrugged


    ¡°What if I mistakenly called you Clement in school and I embarrassed you?¡± did my voice really need to go weak right now.


    ¡± I wouldn¡¯t bother, I told you to call me that, so no problem ¡±


    ¡°but-¡± I was interrupted by someone clearing their throat.


    who else?


    oh yeah. Meredith.


    ¡°so uhm¡­ Dn are you going for the party tonight?¡±


    I¡¯m so gonna kill this child.


    but no¡­ i can¡¯t.


    ¡°hell yeah, I wouldn¡¯t miss it for the world. But that¡¯s part of the reason am here¡± he said now looking at me.Belongs to ? n0velDrama.Org.


    ¡°it is?¡± both Meredith and I said simultaneously.


    s, something we go together on.


    ¡°yup, I wanted to invite you Iris¡±


    He wanted to invite me? he came all the way here to invite me to a party I was already attending?


    ¡°No need sugarplum, cause she¡¯s going already¡±


    Meredith!!


    ¡°really?¡± he actually looked happy. Happy to go with me?


    Am I missing out on something?


    ¡°uhun¡±


    This girl¡¯s got to really let me answer my questions.


    ¡°That¡¯s great, Meredith are you going too?¡±


    oh yeah she is.


    ¡°Who do you think invited her first?¡± she folded her arms and narrowed her eyes.


    Clement just grinned widely and said ¡± So I¡¯ll pick you guys by uh-¡±


    ¡°eight, same venue¡± she replied pointing to my house, now moving her finger back to Clement ¡± don¡¯t bete¡±


    ¡°I¡¯ll try, see you guys then¡± Clement hopped into his car and drove off while I turned to Meredith.


    ¡°Do you think this is a good idea?¡± I¡¯m still unsure, believe me.


    ¡°Of course it is, and guess what. no one would be around to hurt you¡± cing both hands on my shoulder.


    ¡°Really?¡± final step of confirmation.


    ¡°Yes really girl, haven¡¯t you heard? No broken hearts in the club¡±.


    Nope I¡¯ve never heard, but that was enough soothing.


    I¡¯m doing this.


    ¡± let¡¯s do this¡± now am enthusiastic.


    ¡°cool, I¡¯ll be over by six, don¡¯t over eat¡± she yelled as she began walking back to her car and driving away.


    So I¡¯ve learnt a new deal today.


    No broken hearts in the club.

 Chapter 19- All I need

    ? we don¡¯t have to wake up


    cause we didn¡¯t sleep,


    I still got a full cup


    of the Hennessy.


    All my friends by my side


    Is all i need in my life ?


    ALL I NEED- DIMITRI VEGAS FT LIKE MIKE & GU


    True to her word, Meredith was here in fact fifteen minutes earlier.


    reason?


    she was impatient.


    Here¡¯s how it happened.


    shback, two hours ago.


    Mom and Dad left a note on the dining table saying they¡¯ll be staying outte. So I wasn¡¯t expecting them anytime soon.


    Lying on my bed and watching the teddy that was given to me from afar, I heard the bell ring then I got up-


    wait let me rephrase that.


    someone pressed the bell multiple times like it was a button to win a ballot and I jumped out of my bed in shock.


    yeah that¡¯s better.


    I checked the time, and I had fifteen more minutes to expect Meredith, so whose by the door?


    possibly Mom and Dad cancelled work for the day.


    I went down the stairs to get the door. about to open when it was pushed open.


    ¡°I need a pair of scissors, two disposable gloves, an empty jar, a little spat and a size three needle¡± Meredith was saying as she pushed past me with a gigantic box trolling behind her.


    ¡°uh-hi?¡± this girl never ceases to confuse me.


    ¡°oh, I didn¡¯t know I came over for pleasantries. where is your room? chop chop!¡±


    ¡°it¡¯s upstairs, but why do you need all those stuffs? are you performing a surgery or something?¡± I knew I was ugly but not stic surgery ugly.


    ¡°surgery? well if you put it that way, yeah. I am performing a surgery. A hair dye surgery¡± and she whipped around, marching upstairs.


    ¡°I am not a parade, stop watching and follow¡± she shouted from upstairs when she was out of sight and saw I wasn¡¯t following her.


    ¡°I thought you said six o¡¯clock?¡± I shouted back.


    ¡°I was impatient¡± was all I got then I heard a door shut.


    The energy of this girl.


    END OF FLASHBACK..


    So now here we are two hourster in my room with a million clothes littered all over the bed and floor.


    After seventy tries, Meredith ended up with a ck cropped top and washed blue high waisted jeans. while I?


    I¡¯m wearing a ck sequin long sleeve gown that ended mid thigh and glued to my body like a second skin. A round neck that shows no cleavage at all.


    It¡¯s backless and only begins clothing behind from my waist level.


    Clearly meaning, I feel naked.


    It¡¯s only then I noticed the bruise on my back had totally healed but I wasn¡¯t toofortable showing so much skin.


    ¡°Meredith?¡±


    ¡°No! and if you don¡¯t leave that mirror this instant, I¡¯ll make you eat my eyeshadow¡±


    ha¡­ Meredith with theforting words.


    I walked away from the mirror, but I know I¡¯ll be back there in the next five minutes. I¡¯ve been doing this for the past hour now.


    ¡°you look beautiful, and chic I didn¡¯t even know you had a curvy figureddled with an ass under all those your oversize¡± Meredithplimented winking at me.


    I not being used to beingplimented turned red.


    ¡°y-you don¡¯t think I¡¯m showing too much skin?¡± beautiful or not I still feel naked.


    ¡°heck, no one would notice that. Your face will steal the whole show¡±


    Maybe she¡¯s right.


    On a normal day I have never applied makeup, except to conceal bruises or ck eyes.


    But today I actually put on makeup to look pretty. And Meredith showed her skills on my face.


    I walked back to the mirror again.


    I told you guys.


    And viewed my reflection. From my perfectly drawn brows, to my eyes carrying a beautiful tonal graduation of pink to ck eyeshadow. Single winged eye liner and a pink lipstick to top it off.


    I look different.


    The tips of my ck hair had been dyed blond and my slight waves straightened.


    courtesy of Meredith.


    I¡¯m starting to love this girl.


    Still observing my features, Meredith popped into the vision.


    ¡°we don¡¯t want all this beauty to waste now do we?¡±


    I smiled. Meredith looks like a porcin doll. I can¡¯t help but always feel inferior around her.


    ¡°y-you look awesome¡± I had topliment right? that¡¯s what friends do.


    ¡°and you look better¡± then she winked ¡°I saw a ck car pull up on your driveway. Your date is quite adequate¡± she continued and I?


    yup, i turned red.


    We walked out of the house hand in hand and I let go of Meredith to lock up the door.


    ¡°Pretty boy can¡¯t stop staring at you. let¡¯s hope he can keep his hands to himself tonight¡± she whispered in my ear as I was fondling with the keys.


    I have just broken thew of thermal conductivity by being this heated without a source.


    Turning around I met Clement¡¯s green eyes staring at everywhere except my face.


    Oh God, I¡¯m gonna pop. do I look bad? Meredith didn¡¯t say anything.


    ¡°Yo Dn! her face is up here¡±


    trust Meredith to make matters worse.


    His eyes snapped away from my legs as he watched us walk down to the car.


    ¡°you guys look amazing¡± he said but his eyes were fixated on me.Belongs to ? n0velDrama.Org.


    ¡°yeah try saying that next time a few minutes before day dreaming of stripping Iris naked¡±


    ME-RE-DITH!!!


    Clement¡¯s face went red, ¡°you know what? let¡¯s just get going¡±


    And I nodded.


    usuals.


    I scrambled to the back seat cause I was in no way stable to ride shotgun with Clement as the driver.


    The both of them seemed to notice as they both tried hiding theirugh. And I tried hiding my will to die.


    We got in and the car started moving. At first I was excited but then..


    What exactly do they do at parties? Meredith had a long list but none sounded like what I¡¯ll want.


    ¡°ehmm¡­ guys, what exactly am I to do at a party?¡± letting out what is in my mind.


    ¡°all you need tonight is us¡± said Meredith.


    ¡°yeah, just your friends by your side¡± added Clement.


    That wasn¡¯t enough for an answer but the smiles they both gave me was reassuring.


    And then, I was rxed.


    We arrived and the party was already in full swing. Meredith and Clement never leaving my side.


    I had several bottles of soda-not ready to try alcohol yet.


    But Meredith was already wasted. Clement is limiting his drinks cause he¡¯s our driver for tonight.


    So a few hourster and after much words of wisdom from a drunken Meredith, I was feeling the actual vibe to groove.


    Now I was on the dancefloor with Meredith. Clement had left a few minutes ago with some friends.


    Dancing softly to the music I suddenly had the urge to pee.


    I knew I shouldn¡¯t have taken excess soda.


    ¡°hey, Meredith, I¡¯ll be right back. I wanna powder my nose¡±


    I¡¯m not sure she understood me but since she nodded I¡¯m going for it.


    Walking down the hallway towards the toilet and trying to avoid the STD¡¯s flying about the corners.


    eww¡­ how can they be so shameless?


    I was making my way to thedies room when someone gripped my arm.


    ¡°and who do we have here?¡±

 Chapter 20- No tears left to cry

    ? Ain¡¯t got no tears left to cry


    so I¡¯m picking it up,


    I¡¯m picking it up.


    I¡¯m living ?


    NO TEARS LEFT TO CRY- ARIANA GRANDE.


    (WARNING! THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS ABUSE. READ AT OWNERS RISK. I WOULD INDICATE WHEN THE SCENE IS OVER)


    I froze at the oh-so familiar voice and the pressure applied on the grip to my hand. The same hand drew me up so close, I could perceive the musk I¡¯ve learned to fear.


    ¡°I never knew you could wear something that¡¯s not¡­.. appalling¡±ying a little too much emphasis on the word appalling with his hand slightly grazing the bare skin on my back and I flinched away from his touch.


    ¡°Hunter please let me go. I promise to go home¡± I didn¡¯t think I¡¯ll have to beg tonight.


    Only if I had stayed with Meredith.


    or if I hadn¡¯te at all.


    ¡°oh no, tonight I want you to stay as long as you wish¡± he pushed me back against the wall and I hit my head on the impact.


    Using one hand to snake around my waist and hold me tighter, he pulled me deep into his body and I could feel all his muscles ripple through my dress.


    ¡°Hunter p-please¡±


    ¡°shh¡± the curtmand was enough to silence me and have me whimpering.


    He lowered his lips to my neck and his hands went underneath my dress. I¡¯m trying to push him away but my efforts are useless.


    cing kisses here and there that make me want to throw up and his hand slipping in between my thighs to a part that has never been touched before. I felt something hard poke the bottom of my stomach with much agony, I looked to see whatever it was


    Then I noticedit was ¡­¡­. uhmm¡­¡­. him


    And he¡¯s grinding it harder unto my skin.


    Maybe he just wants to scare me with this and let me go.


    please let me go.


    Well I was wrong, because as soon as he freed me from his body, I was about to take to my heels when he grabbed me and threw me over his shoulder.


    ¡°where do you think your going?¡± then he pped my behind that was directly in his face ¡°I¡¯m just getting started¡± and he gave out a bitterugh.


    That¡¯s when it kicked in.


    He¡¯s not trying to scare me¡­. he¡¯s he¡¯s¡­


    I started crying.


    FIGHT BACK! FIGHT BACK!!


    I started pounding against his back and my knees kicking vigorously.N?velDrama.Org ? content.


    ¡°let me go!!, Help!! somebody help me!!¡± I managed to scream with a cracked voice.


    ¡°shut up, you¡¯re gonna cause a scene¡±


    I didn¡¯t care I continued kicking and kicking till I heard a door open that was when I realized I was in a room.


    Desperate times call for desperate measures. I dug my skin into his back and gave the deepest scratch I could have given with my nails.


    ¡°aah!¡± he screeched and threw me down onto the bed but I didn¡¯t give up. I jumped up as soon as Inded to make a run for it.


    But I wasn¡¯t quick enough as he pped me so hard I saw stars in my vision.


    ¡°do you think you can hurt me and go scot free?¡± he gave me another p again that threw me back unto the bed. I lifted my hands to cover my face from any more attacks as I couldn¡¯t feel my cheeks anymore


    ¡°huh? who gave you the audacity to touch me?¡± and with that heclimbed on top me and threw a punch on my stomach.


    ¡°oww!¡± I bent with my hand cradling my stomach to ease the pain but he didn¡¯t let me recover before throwing my arms apart and pulling me by the legs closer to him so he was situated in between.


    ¡± you¡¯re so stupid, I honestly don¡¯t know how you¡¯re still alive ¡± he threw another punch to my face which I¡¯m sure derived an opening on my skin.


    Spreading my legs farther than they can go with his hands holding them in ce, He raised my dress up to my face to cover my view.


    I picked thest drop of energy I could muster and kicked him in the shin. He muttered a strangled fuckbut still didn¡¯t let me go.


    It was then I picked up a scent from him.


    He reeks of alcohol.


    That exins why he even touched me like that in the first ce.


    ¡°Hunter, please.. I¡¯m begging you. I swear to leave and never tell anyone¡± now all I can do is whisper, I¡¯m weak against his strength.


    My fate was in his hands at this point, but I won¡¯t give up.


    ¡°shut it¡± he growled while pining my hands above my head. The pressure he applied on my fore arm is certain to leave a mark.


    even when he¡¯s not normal he still has the ability to give me scars.


    I winced from the pain, trying to wriggle out of his grasp.


    ¡°stay still, or you¡¯ll regret it¡± he hissed andnded a blow to my nose. I heard a crunching sound which has added to the list of things I have to treat after this.


    He took his hand to my right breast to give it a tight squeeze, that totally hurt, more tears slipped down my face, My eyes closed tight while silently praying for someone to walk through that door.


    Hunterughed, so deep and harshly. Theugh that hunts my dreams whenever I manage to fall asleep.


    ¡± you cry for everything, and you expect me to stop?¡± heughed again as he ced his head to my neck. ¡°that¡¯s even more reason why I shouldn¡¯t¡± and ced a slobbery kiss to my jawline.


    ¡°mmm, you taste good, did you know that?¡± he moaned and ran his tongue on my cheek.


    I thrashed against his grip on my wrist to no avail, to which he found my struggle amusing.


    He bit down on my pulse, it was meant to be arousing but was rather painful.


    I can¡¯t take it anymore


    ¡°HELP¡­ somebody please-¡± I was cut shut by his lips on mine. Using his hand to push aside my panties.


    I need a n, and I need it fast. A finger pushing it¡¯s way to my insides was enough to boost my adrenaline.


    With a fake gasp, I opened my mouth slightly to pretend I was enjoying whatever he was doing.


    His lips slowly forming a smirk as he puts his tongue into my mouth.


    Time to strike.


    Pressing down my teeth with all the force I could gather, I bit down on his tongue. After letting out a shriek of pain, he pushed himself off me.


    But before I could rejoice about my victory, he was back on me and with the look in his eyes, all I can see is red.


    ¡°YOU BITCH¡± a blow to my right cheek


    ¡°BASTARD¡± another blow to my left eye.


    ¡°GOOD FOR NOTHING¡± two blows to my stomach.


    ¡°IDIOT¡± he takes a handful of my hair and stares me right in the eye.


    ¡°YOU¡¯RE GOING TO REGRET BEING BORN¡±


    i already do.


    My sleeves are torn from my shoulders and he uses the shredded materials to tie my hands together. Still never breaking eye contact. A smirk stered on his face again.


    I¡¯m dead.


    He lowers his mouth to my ear level and whispers words that send shivers down my spine.


    ¡°Now, sit back and enjoy it while itsts¡± My arms are lifted above my head and tied to the wooden board.


    tears, that¡¯s all i can think of. and how they must have stained my face.


    ¡°you know most girls beg for this¡± he yanks me by the waist to meet his excited member.


    ¡°and here I am giving you for free¡± he unbuckles his belt then goes for my underwear, ripping it at his grasp.


    ¡°Hunter p-please¡± please. someone, something¡­ just¡­ please.


    He gave a breathyugh that sounded like I just cracked the world¡¯smest joke.


    ¡°haven¡¯t you learnt that begging gets you no where?¡± he growled and the intensity made me shrivel.


    Satisfied with the reaction gotten from me, he smiled to himself then positioned at my entrance.


    With onest pleading look from my eyes, I tried to beg silently, but the windows to his soul seemed clouded with the fog of desire.


    All it took was a few seconds and I felt him m hard into me, without caring about the barrier of pain I would face.


    ¡ã¡ãEPISODE OVER ¡ã¡ã


    *****


    He was done with me.


    Fixing the buckle of his belt, he didn¡¯t even bother sparing me a second nce as he walked out the door.


    I on the other hand clutched at the remaining pieces of clothing that still managed to hold together on my body, while staring at my own blood streaked across the sheets.


    At this point I had stopped crying. Just looking nkly to realize how my life was shredding before my eyes.


    I was miserable.


    Wiping the stray tear from my eyes, I stood up from the bed and decided to make my way home.


    Clement and Meredith promised to be with me.


    but they weren¡¯t


    No one ever is.


    I sauntered out of the building, with a sob pricking at the back of my throat and began walking home.


    The cold wind piercing my skin but that was the least of my worries.


    Today I felt different. I felt other than my usual self.


    I felt broken.


    ____


    After almost an hour, walking alone on the road like a ghost and silently observing the eyes of pity and wonder people gave me, I found myself at my doorstep.


    The lights were out, a clear proof that no one was at home.


    I¡¯m always alone.


    Taking the spare key from beneath the flower pot that stood directly beside the door, I unlocked it and stepped in.


    All dark. The entire house. Nothing had a speck of life. Not even myself.


    The very first thing I did was to take a shower. Maybe it will wash away this feeling.


    But it didn¡¯t.


    Iid down on my bed, suddenly fancying the patterns on my ceiling because honestly¡­. I don¡¯t know what else to do.


    Changing my position, I rolled onto my side, only toe face to face with my parents little bear gift.


    The fuzzy animal looked at me with it¡¯s dead beady eyes and I can¡¯t help but think that¡¯s exactly how my eyes look.


    lifeless.


    I let out a sigh but not ready to turn away from the only thing to keep mepany tonight. Little after our stare down my phone began ring with that ringtone that I hoped to always call me.


    Megan.


    Sadly, today I don¡¯t want her call. I don¡¯t want anyone¡¯s call. cing my hand over my ears and shutting my eyes tight. I let the phone ring till the end.


    then again¡­


    then again¡­¡­


    then again¡­¡­¡­


    Then no more calls. Getting up to make sure my door was sealed shut and returning to my bed another calles in.


    I don¡¯t check who was calling, so I don¡¯t know who did. But I do know one thing, and that is I don¡¯t want to talk to anyone.


    Over five calls and the phone is still ringing.


    The more the rings, the more erratic my heart beat became. So I did onest thing,


    I put it on silent.


    Sliding the metallicmunication object to the other end of my bed, I tucked myself to sleep.


    My heart heavy and my head clustered. I wanted to cry.


    I needed to cry.


    But I couldn¡¯t, the tears wouldn¡¯t let out.


    Seconds passed and turned into minutes, still yet not a single tear.


    That¡¯s when I realized why I couldn¡¯t.


    I had no more tears left to cry.


    No more tears because I was empty.


    I was finally broken.

 Chapter 21- faking it

    ? I said I¡¯m okay but,


    I guess I¡¯m a liar ?


    FAKING IT ¨C CALVIN HARRIS FT KEHLANI $ LIL YACHTY


    I woke on a Monday morning feeling quite tired, And in my usual mood.


    Hurt.


    In between my legs hurt and I did not need anyone telling me the reason why.


    So for today, I have a constant reminder of how much worth my life is to people.


    Which is of course, worthless.


    My rm clock went beeping bringing me out of my semi trance, checking the time, I was thirty minutester than my usual time.


    Now that¡¯s a first.


    Who cared if I got to schoolte? The rate at which I¡¯m going, I would be dead much sooner thanter.


    Dragging myself off the bed with my face scrunched up like it¡¯s gonna make the pain down there disappear.


    I stagger to the bathroom with a promise to burn my skin.


    And that¡¯s a promise i fulfilled.


    Coming out of the steaming bathroom with a towel on me, I started dressing only to catch a view of my littlepany for the past nights.


    Whose idea was it to get me this bear anyway?


    possibly mum.


    I shrugged the thought away and forged ahead with my dressing, taking my time since I was alreadyte.


    ¡°Iris? you in there?¡±


    speaking of the devil.


    ¡°wake up honey, you¡¯ll bete for school¡± came her voice once again.


    ha, so someone did care if I got to schoolte.


    Well you can¡¯t really waste her money on fees though.


    true.


    Seconds of silence and she sighed


    ¡°I know you¡¯re awake¡­ I can hear your movement through this door you know¡± sounding exasperated.


    well good, that was my intention.


    ¡± Iris are you okay? ¡±


    Was she asking me that? cause I¡¯m sure she knows I am not going to reply.


    ¡°please speak to me¡±


    so we¡¯re begging now? believe me mum, it gets you no where.


    ¡°your¡­.¡± she trailed off as if re- thinking her words


    ¡± uhmm¡­ that guy you know came here on Friday night asking if you were home, he was with a red hair. do you know why they seemed bothered?¡±


    silence.


    ¡°did you hear me?¡±


    yep, loud and clear.


    I was almost done with my dressing by now. All that¡¯s left is my hair.


    Going to the mirror to fix my hair, I saw the stitch just beneath my hairline, I ran a finger over the tiny long bump before having the chance to stare at my face.


    I look like a shell.


    A lonely, empty shell.


    That¡¯s what I have be.


    My pale skin color is back and I¡¯m back to being a shadow.


    Letting my hair to cascade down my face to cover the scar I picked up my bag and snatched up my phone.


    It had been on silent since Friday and I hadn¡¯t cared to open it. Though I did change it¡¯s position and ced it to charge.


    thirty seven missed calls.


    Opening the list of names who bothered dialling my number and the names didn¡¯t surprise me.


    Megan.


    Clement.


    Meredith.


    Dad.


    Mum.


    Where were they when I was being-


    I can¡¯t even say it.


    ¡°Are you nning on going to school today? are you sick?¡± mum¡¯s voice called through the door. Now that surprised me.


    she was still here all this while?


    that was some long silence.Belongs to ? n0velDrama.Org.


    It¡¯s not like I nned answering her anyway.


    ¡± Your dad and I were really worried that night after your friends came asking for you. We had to call your line but you didn¡¯t pick ¡±


    So she recognizes them as friends¡­ cute.


    ¡°we came to your doorstep and met it locked, which only frightened us the more, till we heard your little snores so we assured them¡±


    hmm¡­ that was creepy.


    ¡°Iris you¡¯ve been in that room for two whole days. at leaste breathe some fresh air¡±


    I have a window, thank you very much. Plus I¡¯ve been out of my room twice to feed. you wouldn¡¯t know cause you¡¯ve never been around.


    ¡°Are you honestly not going to say anything?¡±


    you of all people should know the answer to that.


    Few adjustments were made and I headed for my door.


    ¡°for heavens sake Iris, say something to me. Anything¡±


    oh¡­ she wants something? she¡¯ll get it.


    I opened the door,ing face to face with my mom¡­ and Dad.


    And here I am thinking I was holding the belt to silence awards, my dad had just effortlessly beat me to it.


    My mom opens her mouth to speak but I raise a hand to shut her.


    she demanded for a word, and I¡¯ll give it to her.


    ¡°you asked me to say something right? well here it goes. When I say I¡¯m okay, I¡¯m okay and I don¡¯t want you anywhere near me. Stop trying to act like my mom when you¡¯re not. You practically do not care about me. Stop butting into my business, stop standing by my door to initiate a conversation, stop asking me questions you know I¡¯ll never answer, stop-¡± I was halted midway by my dad calling my name.


    ¡°Iris, that is no way to talk to your mother¡± pointing his index finger at me.


    ¡°The same goes for you¡­ dad¡±


    I was done here.


    Leaving my mom with her mouth bobbing like a fish out of water, I started walking away.


    ¡°Come back here this instant¡± my dad barked at me.


    ¡± Tell that to someone who cares enough to listen¡± and with that, I was out of the house.


    ¡±¡±¡±¡±¡±¡±¡±¡±¡±¡±¡±¡±¡±¡±


    I chose a car ride to school, not because I wanted to make it on time. Believe me when I say I really don¡¯t care howte I am. But I¡¯m in my car because I already felt ufortable sitting, hence I was in no mood for my bicycle.


    After locating a parking spot, I walked into therge building with my head sagging so low, one could practically see my neck.


    Luckily for me, Meredith was no where to be found. Taking my necessities from my locker and closing it shut, an announcement red through the speakers; Demanding all students be gathered in the homeroom for a few words from the Principal.


    Clutching my books tightly to my chest I made my way to the almost full ssroom.


    The Principal was already on the podium giving out a few messages.


    ¡± Our school¡¯s football team was nominated for a national championship game ¡± that earned a round of apuse from everyone in the room.


    everyone except me that is.


    After much hoots and cheers, our football captain and my worst nightmare signalled for our schools signature call.


    ¡°When the moon is out, we the wolves-¡± He shouts so loud and puts his palm behind his ear waiting for the response to the call.


    And he got it, because every soul in this room howled like a wolf in response.


    every soul except mine though.


    Hunter received high fives or pats on the back with others calling him Alpha, as he is the head of our football team. The Wolves.


    I could do nothing but stare at the person who took my innocence without a second thought on Friday night. The one who tore me apart piece by piece till I was finally broken.


    I watched him with a stone in my heart, smiling like he has no care in the world.


    He was living a happy life, while I was broken.


    I couldn¡¯t remove my gaze from him. Well, not until his eyes met my own. And he held them for a few seconds.


    After which, his smile turned to a smirk. A full indication that he remembers fully well what happened that night.


    He remembers and doesn¡¯t regret it.


    We eventually unlock our gazes and I focus back on the announcement.


    ¡± So our football team would be gone for two months as a result of the games, I want you to wish them all the luck they can get. Thank you ¡± With that he gets off the podium and leaves the hall. The rest of the students cheering the football team on their recognition.


    I on the other hand, found the same enclosed space with Hunter suffocating.


    About to leave the exit, someone pulls me to a stop.


    ¡°Hey, I¡¯ve been trying to reach out to you since Saturday, where did you run off to?¡±


    I looked at the red head like she had grown a third eye. An awkward moment passes between us and she gives the conversation another try.


    ¡°Dn, errr- Clement is on the football team, wouldn¡¯t you want to wish him luck? he¡¯d be expecting you.¡±


    I didn¡¯t grace that statement with an answer. And she took it as a leverage to know something¡¯s wrong.


    ¡°Iris? are- are you alright?¡±


    Iughed inwardly at how stupid the question seemed, but didn¡¯t let it show.


    The bruised on my face and nose isn¡¯t already an answer to that question?


    ¡°I¡¯m fine¡± was my curt reply and I left her standing there.


    ?????????????????????????


    Today was my afternoon shift at Tucker¡¯s, and I was really grateful for something to clear up my mind.


    Avoiding Meredith at school was harder than it seemed in my head. Every where you turned, you¡¯ll see her with her puppy eyes begging for a talk.


    And that was what I did not want.


    Recording and calcting the money in the counter when the table bell was chimed.


    ¡°Good afternoon and wee to Tucker¡¯s, how may I help you?¡± my head still down, trying not to forget the figures in my head.


    ¡°I need a full te of Iris¡±


    And I looked up, to meet those green eyes that pleaded with me to trust them.


    Isn¡¯t he supposed to be somewhere in Chicago?


    ¡± I thought you guys had gone ¡± I asked with a little voice.


    ¡± We were already moving, but made a quick stop to grab lunch nearby, so I decided to check up on you. Lucky for me you¡¯re here¡± he looked deep into my orbs like he could read my emotions and his brows narrowed.


    ¡°Well as you can see, I¡¯m fine¡± the response was quick and I went back to counting my money.


    ¡°Iris, are we back to pushing me out again?¡± I don¡¯t have to see his face to know he¡¯s hurt, I could detect it from his voice.


    ¡°I said I¡¯m fine¡±


    ¡°you don¡¯t look like it¡±


    ¡°that¡¯s none of your business¡±


    ¡°Iris, you look like a ghost¡±


    ¡°I SAID I¡¯M FINE, LEAVE ME ALONE¡±


    Silence.


    That¡¯s all I can hear between us.


    He raised his hands up in surrender, with a sad expression on his face.


    ¡°Sorry for ever disturbing you¡± that came out breathy from him.


    ¡°thank you¡± I answered while taking view at the floor to my feet.


    ¡± Just do me onest favor before I leave you¡±


    Now I could look at him, wondering what I can possibly do for him.


    After getting my attention, he began to speak.


    ¡± Wish me luck in my game. I¡¯ll need it¡±


    I was confused.


    I just told this guy to get out of my life and he begs for my luck as hisst wish?


    Why does he have to make things so different?


    ¡°Good luck¡± it¡¯s barely a whisper, but he can hear me.


    ¡°Thank you¡± he says with a nod, then turns around and begins to walk away.


    To walk out of my life.


    And all I can do is watch him.


    That¡¯s what I wanted isn¡¯t it?


    I¡¯m okay, I¡¯m okay.


    That¡¯s what I keep telling myself, hoping it will be true.


    well I guess I¡¯m a liar.

 Chapter 22- Everybody hates me

    ? The more I read it, yeahContent property of N?velDra/ma.Org.


    the more I take offense ?


    EVERYBODY HATES ME ¨C THE CHAINSMOKERS


    It¡¯s been a week.


    A week since I spoke to Meredith. A week since I heard from Clement. A week since my parents bothered me.


    So yeah, it¡¯s been a really long week.


    I was leaving my locker to attend myst ss for the day, A shadow casts in my line of sight, but from the bangs and waves, no need to confirm the person.


    ¡°hey¡± Meredith¡¯s whisper came out a lot shallow than her personality could reach.


    I took that chance to look at her. After a week, Meredith looks dull. The light in her eyes faded, but still held an ounce of hope.


    Hope that my thoughts might have changed after a week.


    but guess what? it hasn¡¯t.


    ¡°how have you been? you know.. with Hunter far away and all?¡± The name made me cringe.


    Disgust brewed in my belly at the thought of his hands on my body.


    And this feeling has been there for the past three days.


    Bute to think of it, This week had been the most peaceful week of my life. That¡¯s what I needed to have done a long time ago, to push everyone away and get my peace.


    ¡°Iris, why are you mad at me?, this silence is killing me.¡±


    Was I mad at her? I couldn¡¯t tell. Was I mad at anyone? I don¡¯t think so.


    Who was I really angry at? every one seemed to have a role in my current behavior, but who was I actually mad with?


    I could me Hunter for what he did, but I can¡¯t, because if only I wasn¡¯t vulnerable, he won¡¯t have done that.


    I could me my parents but they need the money to sustain us as a family, so I couldn¡¯t me them either.


    I could also me Meredith and Clement for convincing me to go to that party in the first ce, but I can¡¯t, because I left their side when they clearly told me not to.


    So who was I angry at?


    myself.


    I¡¯m angry at myself for being weak, for being worthless, for being stupid.


    I¡¯m angry at myself for hoping and believing that there was a light at the end of my tunnel.


    I¡¯m angry at myself for standing strong for so long, just to get broken like a flimsy ceramic bowl.


    I am angry at myself.


    ¡± I¡¯m not mad at you ¡± the least I could do was to assure her.


    ¡°oh, uhmm¡­. well in that case, can-¡± I had to cut her short because this conversation is not what i look forward to.


    ¡°I¡¯m not mad at you doesn¡¯t mean I¡¯m okay with you¡± make it simple and clear.


    ¡°oh¡± that¡¯s all she said, and I have never been more grateful for herck of speech.


    With a nod, I strutted to my ss.


    £¤£¤£¤£¤£¤£¤£¤


    The final bell of the day rang, now my routine.


    quick stop at my locker.


    off to my home.


    sorry ¡®house¡¯, that sounds better.


    I pulled open the locker after unlocking the code, but a paper slides out of it to the floor.


    Without much dy, I picked up the note and read it.


    I¡¯m sorry.


    Meredith.


    Nothing else was written, just that.


    She¡¯s sorry? why the hell is she sorry??


    I put the piece between my books and shut the locker to head out.


    A slight nce to my right and I saw her standing there, watching me like she was expecting me to say something.


    She apologized and that suddenly makes things okay between us?.


    I scoffed inwardly, if that¡¯s what she thought, then she¡¯s wrong.


    Turning full left, I marched out of school premises.


    *****


    Parking my car on thewn, I stepped out and made my way to the door.


    My fist was just leaving the door after my third knock, when it was opened by my dad.


    ¡°how was school?¡± he asked and moved aside to make way.


    I in response only nodded and walked toward the stairs.


    ¡°there¡¯s food in the kitchen if you¡¯re hungry ¡±


    More nods from my flexible neck as a reply before I headed for the stairs.


    On the third step, his voice called out again.


    ¡°your mom¡¯s in the backyard ¡±


    apparently that doesn¡¯t deserve my nod.


    So I ignored it and got to my destination.


    My room door was wide open when I got there and that¡¯s a really strange urrence.


    I took my steps with caution, For all I know, the grim reaper could be waiting for me in here to eventually end my life.


    one step.


    two steps..


    more steps¡­


    Hmm¡­ no pitch forks or des.


    okay, so I¡¯m safe¡­.. for now.


    No harm, but something else caught my eyes.


    A card.


    A card lying on the bear that has proven trustworthy.


    Gently closing the door, I made my way to the red paper.


    All the glitters and hearts all over would be enough to make you believe it was the art work of a seven year old.


    And yes, it was made by a seven year old.


    A seven year old Iris.


    This card was an apology card I gave to my parents ten years ago, when I identally broke my mom¡¯s birthday gift from dad.


    They kept it all these years.


    But why are they giving it back to me.


    And that was when I pieced two and two together.


    my apology card made them forgive me.


    so they think it¡¯ll make me forgive them.


    ha¡­ self deceit¡­


    Opening the card to read what was written inside and I almost burst intoughter at my horrible hand writing.


    I¡¯ve done something wrong,


    And I¡¯m not going to say it.


    but I am so sorry.


    please forgive me.


    from your daughter you love sooooooooooooo much.


    Iris?


    I had to chuckle at my obliviousness, Your daughter you love so much.


    I¡¯ll be damned if they love me.


    What¡¯s with everyone and the apologies? do they think some words would change a decision I¡¯ve taken years to make?


    Is that how weak and unstable they think I am?


    This is clearly more than calling me stupid to my face.


    The more I read these paper¡¯s, the more I actually take offense.

 Chapter 23- Bleeding out

    ? so I peel my skin, and I count my sins,


    and I close my eyes, and I take it in.


    I¡¯m bleeding out, I bleed out for you ?


    BLEEDING OUT- IMAGINE DRAGONS.


    Another morning and I¡¯m still finding it difficult to get out of bed.


    This nausea and fever is really getting to me.


    Tossing and turning on the bed, trying to find afortable side but all efforts proved futile.


    To my luck, school was cancelled today.


    why you ask?


    It¡¯s been two months since the school¡¯s football team had left and they returnedst week Friday with second ce.


    Our position was due to Cole¡¯s injury in the semi finals, but the school was proud of them none the less.


    And to prove their pride, they called off school on Monday to organize and carry out a parade for them at night in the school¡¯s stadium.


    I on the other hand didn¡¯t want to go for the event and now I have a good reason.


    if only the reason wasn¡¯t so ufortable.


    Checking the time, which read eleven am prompt, I decided to go to the nearby clinic that is just few blocks away.


    Getting out of bed grudgingly, and staggering like a drunkard; I entered the bathroom to clean up. Ignoring the dizziness lurking in my head.


    Brushed my teeth and arranged my hair, willingly skipping the part where I shower because with my body burning up, I shouldn¡¯t use hot water.


    And cold water is gonna hurt like a bitch.


    A pink T-shirt and ck jeans seemed the easiest thing to find so I chose it.


    I stepped out of my room and headed for the exit.


    Dad and Mom are out so I¡¯m home alone, which is a good thing. I¡¯m actually not ready to exin anything to anyone.


    Leaving the house and after making sure it¡¯s locked, I get in my car.


    With myst drop of adrenaline, I drove off.


    :::::::


    Right now It¡¯s few minutes to two pm and I¡¯m in the waiting room with my legs crossed and my fingers ying endlessly like there was an invisible piano on my knees.


    The fever is gone but the feeling of disgust in my belly causing the puke has got to go.


    A couple in front of me seem as nervous as I am.


    why am i nervous?


    why won¡¯t i be? i could being down with something terminal and the fever could be a sign.


    But the couple looked kind of scared. The man held a little girl in his hand like his life depends on it, while his wife just stared ather like she was surreal. But their baby was asleep.


    That made me wonder how a true family was.


    A little kid with no worries and parents who love her to death.


    That¡¯s how a family should be, that¡¯s how my family should be, but it wasn¡¯t.


    ¡°Miss Iris?¡± A petite nurse called me out of my thoughts.


    ¡°y-yes¡±


    ¡°The doctor would see you now¡± and she receeded into a door, Indicating I should follow and I did.


    After a few steps from the door we entered, thedy pointed to a door on the left. With a smile she bowed and let me go on.


    A short prayer and much good wishes from my heart, then I braced myself and opened the door slightly.


    ¡± Excuse me?¡± I called out to get the attention of the doctor.


    ¡°Is that Miss Iris?,e in¡± a woman with a broad smile and sses on her face responded.


    she¡¯s happy means good news.


    I changed my demeanor and let myself rx as I walked in.


    ¡°thank you¡± I piped up.


    ¡°Have a seat dear¡± she continued, gesturing to the seat across her, I obeyed the instruction.


    not like i wanted to disagree.


    ¡± How are you feeling?¡± she asked me, still maintaining her smile.


    ¡°I¡¯m good¡±


    ¡°and your stomach? any feelings?¡± now she has a serious mask on.


    ¡°I still have this weird feeling, but it is almost gone¡±


    She nodded and began searching her drawer for something.


    ¡°The nurse took your vitals earlier?¡± she asked still searching.


    ¡°yes¡± a short reply to which she nodded again.


    The curiousity is gonna kill me.


    ¡°uhmm¡­ I hope it¡¯s not something terminal, is it?¡± I had to ask, I wanted to die a natural death, not a really slow and painful one.


    But she didn¡¯t prove me right or wrong, she just gave a heartyugh and took off her sses.


    ¡°Depending on how you take it, but to me it¡¯s not a terminal illness sweetheart¡± she said after containing herughter.


    That put me at ease and I smiled.


    She finally found the file she was searching for and ced it on the desk.


    ¡°Miss Iris Shawn, you do not have any disease¡± I let out a breath of relief and she proceeded.


    ¡± but rather you¡¯re two months pregnant. Two months and a week rather¡±


    It took ten whole seconds for her words to sink in and I waited for her to say ¡®sorry, wrong report¡¯


    But when she didn¡¯t realization dawned on me.


    Pregnant !


    I¡¯m pregnant !


    Then it hit me,


    And my world shattered.


    How could I have been so stupid.


    The day Hunter had me, he wasn¡¯t using protection.


    And I forgot to check it out.


    For two months, Two whole months.


    And I was stupid not to have remembered to get checked.


    The vomit?, the drowsiness?, the heavy feelings?


    I had a baby growing in me and I was oblivious.


    I was pregnant with Hunter¡¯s baby.


    ¡°Miss Shawn are you okay?¡± the doctor called out to me and I had to blink twice to be sure it was reality.


    I nodded and she continued speaking.


    ¡± Alright, the reason you¡¯ve been feeling excessively weak is because your immunity is weak, but we¡¯ve given you a medication to handle that and you can carry the baby safely¡± she hands me a paper with scribbles on it.


    I collected the paper with shaky hands and she bids me a goodbye with a smile on her face again.


    I walked out of the office staring at the paper that held the results to my tests.


    And she wasn¡¯t lying.


    %%%%%%%


    I didn¡¯t go home after the diagnosis, honestly I didn¡¯t know where to go.


    So I went to the park.


    Sitting on the bench for the past few hours, I hadn¡¯te out with my phone so I couldn¡¯t tell the time but the sun was long gone.


    I¡¯m looking at my image in the puddle of water directly below me.


    I look drained.


    I¡¯d be surprised if I looked any different. The most events had happened to me in two months than the past years I moved here.


    Lost in my head till a ballnds directly on my face in the reflection and sshes on my trousers.


    I got out of my mind to check out the source of the ball.


    ¡°I¡¯m swowie¡± a little girl not more than five stood near where I was seated.


    ¡°I¡¯m swowie, my bally slipped¡± she couldn¡¯t even look me in the eye while talking.


    ¡°it¡¯s okay¡± I said softly and picked up the ball.


    ¡°here¡± giving her the little red ball.


    ¡°sorry about that, Leah did you apologize?¡± A lean man walked up to us, not looking above forty five.


    ¡°yes daddy¡± she took her ball from me and apologized once more.


    ¡°don¡¯t worry kid¡± I smiled at her cuteness and good manners.


    ¡°she apologized, there¡¯s no problem¡± I told her Dad as I got up.


    it¡¯s time to go home anyway, this was just a notification.


    ¡°hope we didn¡¯t disturb you?¡± he asked me with bother in his eyes.


    ¡°nope, I was about leaving anyways. Goodbye bye Leah¡± I waved to the little girl as I started walking.


    ¡°bye stranger¡± she shouted back.


    I couldn¡¯t help butugh. She¡¯s a lovely kid.


    Am I ready to train a kid like her?


    I¡¯m broken, what could I possibly give to her aside from hurt.


    I can¡¯t even give her a father.


    The moonlight is prominent on the gravel pathway to the parking lot.


    As I walked, I thought of the possibility of making it with this child.


    It was zero to none.


    The parade is to have begun by now. It¡¯s already dark. Hope they have fun.


    But as for me, I have something else in mind to do.


    Then I found my car, and drove away.


    ^^^^^^^


    The light on the porch is a clear symbol that someone is home. But that won¡¯t stop me.


    I parked my car and rushed out to the door.Content property of N?velDra/ma.Org.


    Swift knocks and my dad answered the door.


    ¡± uh¡­ how you doing kid?¡±


    the least i owe him is an answer.


    myst answer.


    ¡°I¡¯m o-okay¡±


    That¡¯s not meant to sound shaky. It¡¯s my choice isn¡¯t it?


    He seemed really shocked that I replied, and that¡¯s a good thing. I gave him a moment to remember.


    My mom too stood still in the living room with awe written all over her face.


    But it¡¯s good they didn¡¯t push it by asking more. That, I would not gratify with my response.


    I pushed passed his frozen figure by the door and ran up the stairs, to my room.


    I left the door wide open so they can find me if they please.


    After pacing round my room, looking at every single thing that had kept me to this point, I felt defeated.


    My pillow that hid my tears, my bed that cleaned my blood, my windows that refused to deprive me of oxygen no matter how miserable life became, my mirror that beheld my broken images for years¡­ but never stopped showing me a good side to live for.


    Then I did what I felt I had lost the ability to do.


    I started crying.


    Slow drops fell from my eyes as I looked at myself in the mirror.


    That girl that wanted to be a world famous entrepreneur is nothing but a ghost.


    a walking dead.


    Life had done it¡¯s part, and now it¡¯s my turn toplete the journey.


    I opened the drawer to my closet and found a box of razor.


    I looked at the razor still contemting my decision, but all thoughts bound to I have no use living.


    I picked up the box like it was the fragile one and not me. Slowly removed its content and held it between my fingers.


    My brain giving me every reason to go ahead. I abandoned everyone I know because I didn¡¯t need them. Because they didn¡¯t help me.


    Clement, Meredith, Mom, Dad,


    Megan.


    Am I doing the right thing? They apologized but I still locked up my heart.


    What of the baby?


    When it¡¯s born, life would be miserable for her just like mine. She would have no one for her. I can¡¯t even promise that I¡¯ll be there for her.


    She won¡¯t even have a father.


    i can¡¯t do this to her.


    If she¡¯s never born, she will never know what it feels to be alone.


    To be hurt.


    This is the right thing to do.


    The doorbell was rang and I saw it as a sign to finish what I had started.


    I pressed the de to my wrist and squeezed my eyes shut.


    I¡¯ll make this quick.


    Tears dripping from my eyes to my upheld forearm marking the area for incision.


    three¡­.. , two¡­¡­,


    And it happened.


    I ran the de from my wrist all the way up to my elbow, and made the cut as deep as it can be.


    The line mark hurts like a deep pinch but I ignore the feeling.


    Leaning my back against the wall, I wait for the effect to kick in.


    More doorbells and I¡¯m beginning to think it¡¯s my hallucination signalling my time up.


    A light headed feeling makes its way to my head and I slide down the wall. Every single thing turns into a blur before me while I hear voices approach my door.


    My eyelids close in final submission to my will, everything going ck. Air eventually gives up on supplying me and I don¡¯t fight against it.


    ¡°OH MY GOD !!¡­ IRIS!. JESUS CHRIST SOME ONE HELP!¡±


    That scream was loud enough to knock me conscious.


    ¡°Iris please, please don¡¯t do this to me, Iris wake up please, anybody¡± the familiar voice came nearer and was shaking my almost limp body vigorously.


    ¡°Iris open your eyes, don¡¯t give up on me!!¡±


    toote i had already given up.


    but I obeyed themand.


    i opened my eyes.


    I opened my eyes and came face to face with a girl that I learned to love long ago.


    Megan.


    ¡°Iris I¡¯m here, please don¡¯t leave me¡±


    she was crying.


    But I couldn¡¯t stop her. I can¡¯t even stop myself.


    ¡°Dn help me!!, DYLAN !!¡±


    But I was already gone. All I can say is I was a human. A human that did nothing to benefit this world.


    But I was here. I lived and I loved.


    With that thought I watched myself bleed out.

 Chapter 24- Sad

    ? suicide if you ever try to let go


    I¡¯m sad I know, yeah


    I¡¯m sad I know, yeah?


    SAD ¨C XXXTENTACION


    beep. beep. beep.


    Continuously repeating itself meanwhile my body felt stiff.


    I inhaled a really deep breath and caught a whiff of disinfectant mixed with bleach.


    something¡¯s not right.Content property of N?velDra/ma.Org.


    Opening my eyes by an inch, all I saw was white.


    could this be heaven?


    But pastor¡¯s always said in paradise all things are beautiful. So heaven should at least smell like a lovely fragrance?


    I opened my eyes wider and saw a loop of wires.


    definitely not heaven.


    So where am i?


    Turning my head full left, and my boring ck eyes met with who gave them to me.


    ¡°oh my goodness, she¡¯s awake¡± my mom threw the newspaper she held in her hand, jumped up from her seat and ran to me on the bed.


    ¡°my God, Iris how are you? are you feeling any pains? can you see me?¡± she waved her hand in front of my face as she asked thest question.


    I could see her alright, but that¡¯s the problem. I don¡¯t want to see her.


    I couldn¡¯t answer. I didn¡¯t know how to. I stared nkly at her face and started crying.


    I couldn¡¯t do anything. Not even taking my own life.


    ¡± w-why are you cr-¡± my mom started asking but was cut off by the door to my ward opening.


    In came my dad, Clement and Megan.


    Megan? what¡¯s she doing here?


    All seemed shocked to see me awake, so they came up to me with surprise all over their faces.


    Well, all but Clement. He remained by the door with his arms in his pockets.


    Dad got to me first, after giving mum a brief hug he turned to my side.


    ¡°heyyy, how you doing?¡± saying each word slowly like I was an endangered species.


    My speech was inhibited, not that I can¡¯t talk, but because I want to know what they¡¯ll have to say after almost losing their only child.


    I wish it wasn¡¯t an almost. But he continued speaking either way.


    ¡°Your mom and I were scared, everyone was. why did you do that to yourself?¡±


    They were scared? why did I do it?


    Now was the time to speak up.


    ¡± It took you guys till my nearly death experience to be scared for me, when Ie face to face with death almost every single day of my life with Hunter?¡± my voice sounded ragged and wheezy but I don¡¯t care. This anger needs to be poured out now.


    ¡± honey, we-¡±


    ¡°don¡¯t honey me.¡± I interrupted mom when she started. ¡°don¡¯t you dare honey me. You guys literally don¡¯t give a shit about my life. I cried to you almost every day of my life since we moved here, but were you scared?, I came back home with blood and scars, but were you scared? I came back home with results that degrade each session, but were you scared? No. All you cared about was the kid is your bosses son so you can¡¯t badmouth him.


    I¡¯ll be left home alone for day¡¯s, you weren¡¯t scared that I might be a victim of burry attack. I practically had no friends and you weren¡¯t scaredthat I might be having a psychological issue. I found it difficult to eat food sometimes but you weren¡¯t scared that I may have beening up with a disease. I cut you guys out of my life¡­¡­¡± my tears overflowing but I need to say it.


    deep breaths.


    ¡°I cut you guys out of my life and you weren¡¯t scared that your daughter, your only kid, might not love you anymore. What makes you think I¡¯ll believe you were scared for me, huh?¡±


    My mum was in tears and my dad red eyed. Everybody went silent. The beeping of the machine is the only prominent sound in the room.


    ¡°we¡­ we¡¯re so-sorry¡± mom blurted in between sobs.


    ¡°I want you two to leave ¡± I didn¡¯t look them in the eye to say that. Watching the needle in my hand supply blood, I heard feet shuffling and the shadows beside me disappeared.


    I broke into a sob and Megan came up to my bedside tofort me. Leaning my head on her shoulderI continued to cry but felt my bed dip by my side.


    Clement hade to sit by me and held my injected hand in his. I enveloped him in a hug while he rubbed circles on my back, whispering it¡¯s gonna be okay to me.


    I on the other hand wished it would.


    We remain in that position till a familiar voice and red hair came in the room.


    ¡± Guys, I think there is something about this doctor¡¯s report that we should know, it sa-¡± Meredith stops halfway when she walks into the room and saw I was awake.


    Her eyes really expanded by at least ten inches.


    ¡°Iris. uhmm¡­. hi¡± she waved at me from a distance like she was scared I¡¯ll reject her again.


    but believe me, the look on her face is priceless.


    I burst intoughter and released myself from Clement.


    e here¡± with outstretched arms I called for her to give me a hug.


    She smiled and walked up to me to engulf me in a tight embrace.


    ¡°Iris, I¡¯m so sorry for whatever I did to you, and you can still hate me but please don¡¯t ever do this to yourself again¡± she sounds hurt.


    ¡± That¡¯s a promise I¡¯m willing to make ¡± we broke apart smiling.


    A few seconds tick by and finally I begin to ask the questions that had been bugging me.


    ¡± Megan, how did you know where to find me?¡±


    She and Clement share knowing looks, while Meredith looks as interested in this story as I am.


    wait. please don¡¯t say you¡¯re dating. or worse engaged.


    ¡°Remember when I told you my mom found a guy to get married to?¡±


    I nodded.


    ¡± Well, turns out the family happens to be this nitwit over here¡± gesturing to Clement who just gives a shrewd smirk.


    ¡± When I found out he was gonna start going to your school, I told him to help watch you for me. And looks like he did more than that¡± she finishes and nces at Clement and I¡¯s entwined hands that I didn¡¯t even notice.


    ¡± So the only reason you spoke to me is cause she made you?¡± I referred to Clement. If not for Megan he would never have spoken to me.


    ¡°Megan suggested someone she felt I could make friends with. If I didn¡¯t like you I would have let you go after meeting you ¡± he replied honestly.


    ¡± How did you know it was me?¡± I asked


    ¡°Believe me when I say Megan is a master of description¡± he responded.


    ¡°Plus I sent him a picture¡­ Or two¡± Megan shrugged while Meredithughed.


    That exins how he knew my name before and why he expected me to know him.


    ¡± Why did you guys drop by my house?¡±


    ¡°I was in town so we were going to celebrate Dn¡¯s second ce victory at your school when I decided to surprise you with my presence¡± Megan began


    ¡°I told her that we weren¡¯t on best of terms since you practically begged me to walk away from your life during ourst encounter¡± Clement continued with a crease to his brows and I felt very, very bad at the moment.


    ¡± Well, yeah. But I told him I could convince you toe with my awesomeness¡± Megan started before Clement cut in.


    ¡± To which I had no doubt¡± sarcasm dropping out ofClement¡¯s every word.


    ¡± So we headed to your ce first and I decided not to go in due to terms, but Megan did. And when I heard her scream your name I had to rush and see for myself¡± he finished with a low sigh.


    ¡°That was a sight we both want to forget¡± Megan whispered.


    I felt really bad for them. I never thought of it as the way they saw it. But I had more questions.


    ¡°B-but how did Meredith get to know?st I remember before passing out was seeing Megan and hearing her call for Dn ¡± I need answers. don¡¯t me me.


    ¡°You lost a ton of blood before they were able to get you to the hospital. The doctor said you needed a transfusion to survive so someone had to donate blood.¡± Meredith was exining.


    ¡°You¡¯re Type O, but your parents are both A¡¯s. I¡¯m a B and Dn here is an A too and we were not in the mood to collect from strangers, so Dn said he knew of someone who could help¡±Megan added to the tale.


    ¡°I ran out to school to fetch Meredith and saw her stuffing her face on the bleachers¡± Clement flicked an invicible speck of dust off Meredith¡¯s hair.


    ¡°heyy¡­ it¡¯s called eating¡± Meredith whined while rubbing the spot on her head. ¡°anyway, when he told me what happened, I followed him to the hospital and luckily for us we¡¯re both same group, and that¡¯s how we saved you¡±


    They went through all the struggle for me. Even Meredith that I had rejected her apology helped me.


    This warm fuzzy feeling in my belly is back. which could mean two things. Either I¡¯m happy, or the baby is.


    Hunter¡¯s baby.


    The thought brought a frown to my face and I believe they noticed.


    ¡± You okay?¡± Meredith asked after taking in my facial expression.


    ¡°Yeah¡± I piped up a fake smile ¡± how was the parade yesterday?¡±


    ¡± Yesterday? the parade was two weeks ago¡± Clement said like he was about tough out his lungs.


    woah hold that thought.


    TWO WEEKS AGO.


    ¡°I was out for two weeks??¡±


    ¡°yeah you were. speaking of weeks¡± Meredith started as she ced a paper on myp ¡°the doctor¡¯s report says you¡¯re eleven weeks pregnant?¡±


    And I¡¯m doomed.


    ¡°you¡¯re what?¡±


    ¡°someone¡¯s been naughty¡±


    Clement and Megan said respectively as Megan wriggled her brows at me.


    ¡°naughty?¡­. Iris and naughty cannot be in the same sentence. Once upon a time I told her that I was gonna eat her and she asked me if I was a carnivore¡± Clement replied to Megan¡¯s statement.


    And while Megan and Meredithughed.


    I turned red. but what else could eat mean? Check note to ask Meredithter on.


    ¡°Iris ?¡± Clement called


    ¡°y-yess¡± shaky response? really?? I¡¯m back to that stage?


    ¡°you¡¯re red again¡± he teased and smiled.


    As I turned redder.


    ¡°stop teasing her¡± Meredith came to my rescue, after having a good share ofughter.


    Theughter had died down and it¡¯s time to get serious.


    Everyone stared at me knowingly as they waited for me to exin.


    deep breath. Again.


    ¡± It happened at the party, you know. the one you guys took me to¡± my voice came out low.


    ¡± Oh God, that exins why you were mad at me. Iris I¡¯m so sorry¡± Meredith started speaking first.


    ¡± It¡¯s not your fault. I left you to go and pee. Then Hunter found me¡± I finished off.


    ¡± That thing raped and knocked you up?¡± Megan asked, her words were spitting venom.


    I nodded in response.


    ¡°Does he know?¡± Clement asked


    I nodded again and he blew out a breath.


    ¡± He was the one who gave you those injuries? that made you think that I was gonna hit you?¡± Clement kept the questionsing.


    well he had a lot bottled up.


    I still nodded a reply though.


    ¡°And with what I heard from you and your parents earlier , I can guess the summary¡± he finished with a sigh.


    ¡± Your parents?¡± Meredith asked.


    ¡°Yeah, while you were with the doctor. we¡¯ll exinter on¡± Megan told her and she nodded in response.


    ¡± Was that why you did it?¡± Megan asked me.


    ¡± Part of the reasons¡± I said and looked at Clement who was deep in thoughts.


    ¡± Poor sweety, we got you¡± Megan said and hugged me. So did Meredith.


    Okay now I know what that feeling is.


    I¡¯m happy.


    A moment of silence engulfed us but Clement broke it.


    ¡°Sooo¡­ Suicide huh?¡± he said with a smirk and got all of usughing.


    I wanted to let go.


    but it seems like it isn¡¯t time yet.

 Chapter 25- Pray for me

    ? who gon¡¯ pray for me


    take my pain for me


    sing a song for me ?


    PRAY FOR ME- THE WEEKEND FT KENDRICK LAMAR


    A weekter and I was discharged from the hospital with a long scar stitch on my left forearm and aplete first trimester.


    The bump of my belly bing a little observable so I did as much to get involved in wearing oversized tops.


    Well, I still had to stay at home for another week cause Megan won¡¯t let me move an inch and my parents secretly pleaded with her to keep me there so they could have a chance to talk to me.


    And Iughed in the face of chances.


    hahahaha.


    But today has been two weeks since my discharge and I¡¯m on a ride to school with Meredith.


    Believe in me when I say this ride was as quiet as a graveyard.


    And that¡¯s a little too odd for her.


    ¡°sooo..¡± and she had to beginContent property of N?velDra/ma.Org.


    ¡°so?¡± my attention now on her.


    Ever since Meredith found out about my condition at the hospital, she¡¯s been treating me like I could break the next second.


    ¡°how¡¯ve you been?¡± trying to sound cheerful but failing woefully.


    ¡°all the same¡± I had diverted my eyes to the road once more, shrugging to my response.


    ¡°what of the¡­ uh-¡±


    ¡°Meredith?¡± summoning her out of the awkwardness.


    ¡°yeah?¡±


    ¡± if you want to ask about the baby, you don¡¯t need to feel shy about it¡±


    ¡± I know, it¡¯s just¡­¡± she halted her exnation. But I need to know.


    ¡°it¡¯s just what?¡±


    She sighed as she finally started to pour out her mind ¡± it¡¯s just that I feel like you¡¯re in this situation because of me , so asking you ¡®hey, how ya doing?¡¯ or ¡®how is the baby kicking?¡¯ feels so much as a heavy stone on my chest¡±


    ¡°what makes you think you¡¯re the cause of anything?¡± I asked her


    ¡°well for starters, if it wasn¡¯t for me, you couldn¡¯t have gone to that party where that douche took advantage of you¡±


    I didn¡¯t say a word because in a way, she¡¯s saying the truth.


    But she also came through for me.


    The silence didn¡¯t go unnoticed by her, for she looked crestfallen.


    ¡°Whenever I try to do something nice for someone I always end up regretting, cause instead of making them happy, they always seem to wish that I never did it ¡± I took a glimpse of her again as she muttered these words more to herself than me.


    But I am pretty sure she knows I heard, so I let her speak on.


    ¡± I¡¯m thest kid of my family, we¡¯re five children. My parents bargained on having only four kids but since I showed up as a plus one, I¡¯ve always been seen as a mistake. It wasn¡¯t just the fact that my parents always looked at me like something they could have avoided but also the fact that I do prove their theories right ¡± She gave herself a pause as her eyes became misty.


    ¡± Some years back when I was still a kid, I wanted to go see a friend at night. Mom and Dad were against me going cause the alley which she lived in wasn¡¯t at all the safest, but I ignored them, going ahead by the way and made my older brothere with me. We walked through the dark alley alone in peace, but on our way back a group of guys attacked me and my brother began fighting them. He fought so hard but it wasn¡¯t enough, they beat him. Iris they beat him till he was bloodied and unconscious. My brother had to undergo four surgeries to be normal. He sustained a spinal injury, two broken ribs, an internal hemorrhage in his skull and lost a kidney. My brother went intoa for six months.¡±


    okay, her story is a lot hurtful than I expected.


    ¡± That¡¯s not all. Last year on my parents anniversary, I wanted to surprise them-m¡± her lips were quivering. At this point she¡¯s already broken into an internal sob.


    I ced my hand on her thigh to remind her that she isn¡¯t alone.


    ¡± I wanted to do something that will change their thoughts about me. So I decided to bake a cake, No one was home and I put my ns to action.¡± a sad ghost of a smile hovering on her lips.


    ¡± But as usual something always has to go wrong. Little gas here and mes there, the next thing I know our house was on fire. I was lucky to have escaped but my parents saw it as another bad luck for themselves. When they heard their home was on fire, they called my other siblings to make sure they were safe, but they didn¡¯t call me. They got to the scene expecting to hear I was lost in the ident but to their disappointment I was alive. In the presence of everyone at the scene they expressed how much they hated me, how much they wished I was diminished in the mes, how much they regretted having me¡± she was in full tears now. This is definitely a day she doesn¡¯t like remembering.


    ¡°They showed no qualms about their disy in public, that¡¯s what made me realize they said the truth, I was nothing but pain to them. I cried, I cried so bad. All I wanted to do was make them happy but I ended up being rejected. That was when ady police officerforted me and took me under her. We moved to this town where i started school and met you¡± She turned to me with a smile on her tear drenched face.


    I couldn¡¯t help but smile back. She had a rough past and here I am making her feel a lot more guilty than necessary.


    ¡± Iris, I¡¯m sorry for everything. I really don¡¯t know how to make it up to you ¡± she continued after fetching a handkerchief to wipe her face.


    ¡°Every thing happened for a reason. I¡¯m sorry for making you feel worse¡± I held her hand.


    Sheughed loud and sniffled a tear.


    ¡°If I were you, I¡¯ll do the same. By the way, my face looks hideous at the moment doesn¡¯t it?¡± checking out her eyes in the rear view mirror.


    ¡°err¡­ how do you say yes without sounding mean?¡± really. She looks like she was just washed up ashore.


    But sheughed again at my words and I joined in the happiness.


    She has been through a lot but she¡¯s still strong. Her parents were simply stupid to let her go.


    But the thing is, she had a redeemer. but me? who¡¯s gonna pray for me?.


    £¤£¤£¤£¤£¤£¤


    Lunch time had gone in a blur and I¡¯m on my way to a ss. Holding my books to my stomach to hide my bump, I kept my head low and walked at a speed iprehensible to human movement.


    I hoped the pace would get me to ss and back without getting into trouble, but I had to be proven wrong.


    I walked into the most muscled wall in the middle of the hallway.


    ¡°what the-Shawn?¡±


    And I almost wet my underwear.


    Hunter.


    This made me realize we were alone in the hall.


    A smirk crossed his features as he folded his arms, while I gazed at the new hall tiles.


    ¡°you¡¯re really alive?st I saw you, you were whoring around. How¡¯s your business been faringtely?¡± I could hear the smug smile on his lips.


    But myposure was as stiff as a rod. I remained still to avoid provoking him.


    ¡°you know¡­¡± he turned to his locker to grab a book before shutting it ¡°for a first timer, you weren¡¯t as bad as I expected ¡±


    You idiot.


    ¡°look at me¡± a curtmand came from him, one I¡¯ve learnt not to ignore.


    But today i had to let thatmand pass. The baby to this soul is currently growing in me.


    i don¡¯t know about you, but I really don¡¯t know what to do.


    ¡°I said look at me!¡±


    Still no response from me.


    He grabbed my stitched forearm and pulled me to himself.


    ¡°when did you be a stubborn dog !¡± he growled in my ear and I whimpered.


    He threw me down to the floor as he released me andnded a kick on my back.


    I felt a really painful sensation grace my lower abdomen.


    ¡°Hunter stop!¡± I cried out while crouching to hold my belly in case of impending hits.


    ¡°give me a reason why I should?¡± he replied grabbing a fistful of my hair to pull me off the ground.


    ¡°I¡­ I¡­ I¡¯m..¡±


    should I say it?


    ¡°you¡¯re what? say something before I discover a reason to connect my knees with your stomach ¡± he hissed and held his knees at a threatening position.


    And that was the only boost i needed.


    ¡°I¡¯m p-pregnant¡±


    His face scrunched in confusion foe a few seconds before realization struck him.


    Maybe he¡¯s gonna-


    My back was mmed against the nearest locker.


    ¡°why do you still have it?¡± he asked like he was on the verge of exploding.


    what?


    My brows furrowed inck of understanding and I¡¯m sure he could read the expression clearly.


    He nced round the hall to make sure no one had heard or was capable of hearing.


    In a low tune that almost resembled a growl he expatiated his point.


    ¡°It¡¯s been four months Shawn !, Four fucking months since we met, why haven¡¯t you gotten rid of that thing!¡±


    thing? he expected me to abort it?


    For the first time since I ever encountered Hunter, I felt angry and it was not at myself.


    ¡± I could have died aborting it you know, the doctor practically exined my immunity was weak to carry a child, talk less aborting it ¡±


    ¡°who cares if you live? what the hell are you useful for?!¡± he shouted into my face.


    The feeling in my lower abdomen still lingering.


    ¡°If you know what is good for you, I¡¯ll give you two weeks to make up your mind and get rid of that creature. Or else I¡¯ll do it myself¡±


    With that he threw me down once more with my weightnding on my waist and walked away.


    This I believe, wasn¡¯t an empty threat.


    Getting up and ignoring the snaps my belly was making, I went to ss.


    ______


    ¡°what are you going to do now?¡± Megan was the first to ask after narrating my ordeal with Hunter to them.


    ¡°For me, your parents should get involved at this moment¡± Meredith said with Clement and Megan nodding in approval.


    ¡°that¡¯s not an option, they¡¯ll brush it off like they always do¡± that¡¯s always it with them.


    ¡± I doubt they will, they don¡¯t even know their own kid is preggers ¡± Megan started. ¡°plus they¡¯ve been dead on worried about you. Believe me, I¡¯m the only one they ask¡±


    I snorted at Megan¡¯s statement because I knew it was all eye service.


    ¡°Well if you don¡¯t want to tell them so they¡¯ll protect you, you can¡¯t be here. Hunter¡¯s parents got your own parents in their palm. Which means he can show up here at any time and your mom or dad can¡¯t question it¡± Meredith added which was a whole lot true.


    Our house is a business benefit from working with the Brooks. Here isn¡¯t safe either.


    ¡± I have an idea¡± Clement propped up that pulled all our attention to him.


    ¡°what if you move in with my mom at the other end of town till you deliver?¡±


    Isn¡¯t his mom Megan¡¯s mom?


    ¡± That sounds like a good n but what of her own parents. won¡¯t it be strange their kid got missing for the next five months?¡± Megan pipped in.


    okay, maybe it¡¯s Clement¡¯s real mom.


    So his parents are divorced. I¡¯m learning more by the day.


    ¡± Just tell them I needed time away from them and I¡¯ll be back ¡± I shrugged.


    it¡¯s not like they care that much.


    ¡°they¡¯ll buy that?¡± Meredith asked fully disying shock on her pretty eyes.


    I nodded a reply and everyone held on to the n.


    ¡°sooooo¡­¡­. now can we have ice cream? if it¡¯s good for the baby that is.¡± Megan asked like a whimsy little girl.


    I chuckled at her character before ending with a smile on my lips.


    ¡°ice cream it is!¡± Megan jeered and every other person cheered in approval.


    remember when I asked who¡¯s going to pray for me?


    i think they¡¯re already doing that.

 Chapter 26- Home

    ? I¡¯ve found no cure


    for the loneliness,


    I¡¯ve found no cure


    for the sickness.


    Nothing here feels like home,


    Crowded streets but I¡¯m all alone?


    HOME- X AMBASSADORS, MACHINE GUN KELLY & BEBE REXHA.


    ¡± Iris? honey you awake?¡± Clement¡¯s mom, Mrs Phoebe calls out as she opens my bedroom door by a squeak for fear of waking me if I wasn¡¯t already up.


    But I have been up for the past two hours. The difort is killing me.


    ¡°yeah I am, good morning Mrs Phoebe¡± came my airy response as I tried to get up from my lying position.


    keyword Tried.


    She made three quick strides into the room and used two hands to drag my heavy butt off the bed.


    Meanwhile I ignore the snap in my belly for the second time this morning.


    ¡± I¡¯ve told you it¡¯s Phoebe and you need to reduce stress on your belly, seven months might be far gone but it is still risky ¡± cing a hand at my lower back to help restore my bnce.


    Okay, some of you might be thinking ¡®why would ady take a pregnant girl under her roof without questions?¡±


    Well here¡¯s a brief exnation.


    Clement and his Mom though separated, are still very close to each other, so he had a few discussions with her about me¡­ to which I found very ufortable¡­ before we ever nned on moving me here.


    ording to her, she says he tells her everything. So when he had a socially withdrawn female friend, he had to tell her too.


    Honestly, I admire their rtionship, unlike my parents who haven¡¯t tried contacting me for the past few months cause I needed space.


    ¡± Okay, but I want to take a shower ¡± if I go without taking a bath, I¡¯m going to stink.


    ¡± I¡¯ll help with that. Are you feeling any cramps?¡±


    ¡°yeah, a lot¡±


    ¡± Then a hot shower it is ¡± and we take slug steps to the bathroom.


    I¡¯m feeling something, yeah I¡¯m hungry.


    what to eat, what to eat?


    Bread and Jam? ¡­. no.


    pasta?¡­. no.


    burger seems nice¡­. nah¡­


    Aha!


    ¡°Mrs Phoebe?¡±


    And my call earned me a re.


    ¡± Sorry, ph-phoebe?¡±


    ¡°yes dear?¡±


    ¡°can I have ice cream after the shower?¡± my shy attribute taking over.


    ¡± a cold and sugary treat for ady to be due in less than ten weeks, hmmm¡±


    She halts in step for a few seconds.


    ¡± you know sugar isn¡¯t healthy for you at the moment right?¡± she asks with a casual tone and I nodded my reply


    ¡± neither is it good for the baby¡± she speaks on as I bob my head in response again already regretting why I asked.


    ¡± so why should I give it to you?¡±


    To me that question should be rhetorical but it isn¡¯t cause she¡¯s looking at me like she expects an answer.


    ¡± I¡¯m sorry I asked¡± my eyes finding the carpeted ground a sce forfort.


    She releases a sigh ¡± Iris no need to apologize, okay if it¡¯s ice cream you want then you clean up first thene down for ice cream, plus we have a little to talk about ¡±


    I mouthed a thank you with a small smile on my lips as the enthusiasm began to fill me.


    A broad smile dances on her face as we continue our movement to the bathroom.


    Sitting me down on the toilet she hands me my toothbrush already smeared with paste and has the shower running.


    ¡± be quick alright?¡± as she ces a peck on my forehead


    ¡°okay¡±.


    ******


    After I was done taking a shower and drying myself up, I put on an oversized purple shirt and a ck leggings.


    At this point oversized is the mostfortable.


    Trying to pack my hair in a bun in front of the mirror as I took note of my paleplexion and swollen fingers.


    just nine weeks and two days to go.


    Abandoning the hair as I had already given up, I skidded downstairs.


    ¡± well that took a whole year¡± Mrs Phoebe chuckled as she dropped a medium sized bowl of cookie dough ice cream in my front.Belongs to ? n0velDrama.Org.


    I couldn¡¯t help but squeal. If this is what pregnancy does to you, this is definitely going to be myst child.


    ¡± Look at you all baby-ing up¡± a loudughter escape two of us and she speaks up to clear the air ¡± have a seat darling ¡±


    Climbing the stool and ripping off the lid of the bowl, I prepare myself for the news about to be told.


    Phoebe clears up her throat and stretches to reach a mug oftte i just noticed.


    ¡± Iris, Meredith called early this morning ¡±


    Okay, no bad news so far.


    ¡± And she was with Megan ¡±


    keep going.


    ¡± And they told me something, something really important ¡±


    where are we headed.


    ¡± A few minutester, after we went off the call¡­¡­ your parents called¡±


    The spoon in my hand slipped off the counter onto the floor.


    ¡± And here¡¯s the something important I was informed about. Your parents don¡¯t know you¡¯re pregnant?¡± she takes a seat across the table and drop her cup like it¡¯s pulling weight on the conversation.


    ¡± Megan and Meredith begged me not to tell your parents too, And when your parents called they were asking to know if you¡¯ll ever return to them¡±


    ¡± Did you tell them?¡± the point of this talk was to tell me they¡¯ve been informed isn¡¯t it?


    ¡± No, no I didn¡¯t ¡±


    I released a breath I never realized I was holding.


    ¡± I didn¡¯t because you¡¯re gonna tell them yourself ¡±


    And the ss of my psychology just shattered.


    ¡± Why should I? it¡¯s not like they¡¯re bothered much about me¡±


    ¡± That¡¯s where you¡¯re wrong. Meredith said that your parents have been pestering them so they could speak to you, just to hear your voice and they felt guilty doing that to them so they gave them my number since you would never answer their calls¡±


    ¡°that doesn¡¯t prove they care¡±


    ¡± when your mom was speaking, she sounded in tears, she pleaded with me to speak to you but I lied you weren¡¯t nearby just to buy me some time to talk to you about it first ¡±


    ¡± mom doesn¡¯t care, she¡¯s always putting on that crying facade just to get me to open up ¡±


    ¡± and when she does that, have you ever opened up and then regretted it?¡±


    ¡± I¡¯ve opened up before and I did ¡±


    ¡± Iris you¡¯re talking like people don¡¯t make mistakes anymore. Your parents made a mistake and they¡¯re trying to make amends. Nobody is perfect ¡±


    ¡± they used to be perfect ¡±


    ¡± And a single mistake is enough to destroy the reputation of your childhood heroes?¡±


    ¡± They put their money before me, it almost cost me my life on many asions, now I¡¯m pregnant and you expect me to forgive them?¡±


    ¡± That was their mistake and a very stupid one at that¡±


    ¡± I might never go back to them¡±


    ¡± The day Clement and the girls brought you here, the night before they left, they begged me for one thing ¡±


    ¡± And that is?¡±


    ¡± To make you see reasons to why you should let your parents in ¡±


    Those betrayals !


    ¡± I promised them i would. Even your friends know that shutting them out isn¡¯t the best¡±


    ¡± what were you expecting me to do?¡±


    ¡± In my course of helping you and trying to fulfill my promise, You told me a lot about your life and parents, You told me that your mom kepting to your room to ask how your day went, you told me your dad tried to get you talking to him and sometimes offered you rides to school which you declined ¡±


    ¡® they only did that to cover up the fact that they couldn¡¯t save me cause of money ¡±


    ¡± the exact same money theyvish on you, baby girl your parents never stopped caring. The only problem was they thought they were doing things for you not knowing they were only hurting you ¡±


    ¡± you¡¯re lying. they stopped caring long ago¡±


    ¡± If they did they wouldn¡¯t have stayed by your side all through the time you went unconscious because you tried to take your own life, they wouldn¡¯t have begged Meredith to keep you at home after recovery so thet can have a chance to speak to you, they wouldn¡¯t have asked you to open up, they wouldn¡¯t have cared about the friends you¡¯re making and wanting to know them. Iris they made a mistake and they realized it reallyte but they have been trying to fix it but you¡¯re not letting them. ¡±


    ¡°If I ever made a mistake with Clement and he shuts me out, I¡¯ll literally lose my mind. You know why? Because Clement is my kid, my only one at that, he is the only one that can be a living proof to whether i have failed in my duty as a parent or not and when he proves to me that I¡¯ve failed i will try my best to make my ways straight because I love him. But when he shuts me out it will seem to me like i have failed forever ¡± she continues and it¡¯s causing a twinge in my chest.


    ¡± That¡¯s the whole point, they don¡¯t love me !¡±


    ¡± Iris, do you miss your former family? before you moved here? before your parents made a the money?¡±


    I nodded because it is true. I miss everything.


    ¡± Then why aren¡¯t you giving them a chance to correct where they¡¯ve been wrong? they¡¯ve never hurt you before, why do you think they will start that intentionally?¡±


    I had no answer to that. Because I have no clue.


    ¡± If you ask me, I¡¯ll say your parents love you, but it¡¯s you who doesn¡¯t love them back. You don¡¯t love them enough because if you did you won¡¯t want to revenge on them by running away. You¡¯ll give them a chance to speak to you, to hear you, to hold you once again. Think about this, you¡¯ll be a mom soon, Imagine if after suffering for all these months trying to be safe for the baby, almost dying on the bed just to see his or her beautiful face be born. Then you make a mistake and he or she never wants to have anything to do with you anymore? I¡¯m a mother and I know how your mom especially, must feel¡±


    She uses her thumb to wipe Beneath my eye.


    ¡± think about it ¡± were herst words and she got up with her cup to go up the steps.


    It was only then that I realized I was crying.


    ¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã¡ã


    ¡± Should Ie with you?¡± Phoebe asked as she parked the car on thewn.


    ¡± No thanks. I want to do this alone ¡± I said with a deep breath and nced at the door of the building.


    It was seven PM at night and the lights were on.


    That means their home.


    ¡± I¡¯m proud of you hun¡± She whispered and gave my hand a tight squeeze before cing a kiss to it.


    ¡± you¡¯ll do fine okay? call me afterwards ¡± she concluded


    With a wry smile shielded by nervousness and a brief hug, I was out of her car and waving her a goodbye.


    She drives off at a slow speed as if expecting me to change my mind, but no. I wouldn¡¯t.


    I swallowed a huge lump of air to numb the butterflies in my stomach but that made little difference.


    I headed to the front door and pressed the doorbell for two seconds before tapping a few knocks on the door.


    A total of fifteen seconds passed ¨C yes I was counting ¨C before shuffling was heard behind the door.


    It¡¯s now or never.


    The door opened revealing my mom with her long silk nightgown.


    Her eyes widened an inch when she saw who was by the door, but added another three inches when she noticed my swollen belly.


    But she did the unexpected.


    She pulled me into a hug.


    ¡± my baby¡­.. my baby you- you came back¡± she said so lowly as her eyes began producing tears.


    She pushed me back a few centimeters but still held me with her arms before looking at me from head to toe again.


    ¡± Tom! Tom iris is back, honey she came back ¡± her tears on full tow now.


    I used this chance to observe her features and she looked a lot different from thest time we saw.


    She has a lot of grey hair sticking out in so many directions, her eyes look swollen like she had been crying for days coupled with the eye bags.


    That was the moment Dad appeared my the door.


    The shock of my stomach evident on his face but the relief of seeing me seemed better to him.


    My dad had developed wrinkles on his face like he aged a lot within these few months.


    ¡°Sweetie?¡± that was my dad speaking. His voice shakey as he sounds like he is waiting for my rejection.


    ¡°y-yes dad¡± the tears are on the way.


    ¡± My God¡± was all dad said and pulled me to a hug too.


    ¡± Honey we¡¯re so sorry, please. we¡¯re begging you to please forgive us¡± Dad mumbled into my hair and mom had joined into the hug, her sobs drenching my shirt but I don¡¯t care.


    ¡± forgive us please ¡± mom managed to blurt out between sobs.


    ¡°o-okay mama, I-I¡¯m sorry too, for shutting you guys out, for hurting you. I¡¯m so sorry. Forgive me please¡± my words heavy as my tears won¡¯t let me.


    ¡± Okay baby. It¡¯s okay. Wee back home ¡± Dad cooed and rubbed my back in a circr pattern as I cried into his chest.


    And that day, my house became my Home once more.

 Chapter 27- Bad bitches don’t cry

    ? If there is one thing


    that I¡¯ll never learn is,


    If you y with fire


    You¡¯re bound to get burnt but,


    Bad Bitches don¡¯t cry ?


    BAD BITCHES DON¡¯T CRY- BEBE REXHA.


    ¡± What color do you want? Purple or blue?¡± Mom asks holding the pedicure kit in her right hand as she takes position on the floor of my feet.


    After I came back home, I decided it was time to let them in, so I told them everything that had happened to me, even the reasons why I tried taking my own life.


    And they promised to stand by me and support me. They nned on confronting Mr Brooks about his son but I went against it.


    That would only cause more problems than it already had, but then again they really felt they were betraying me still by doing nothing.


    So they quit their jobs, but they really didn¡¯t tell their boss the reason as to why they did, and he never asked.


    And believe me when I say that little action made my heart flutter.


    They are trying their very best to restore us back together as the family we used to be and i couldn¡¯t be more grateful.


    ¡± Purple reminds me of rain and that shade of blue is too dark¡± I scrunched up my face and squinted my eyes in the direction of the tiny blue bottle.


    ¡°ookay, what of green?¡± she asked again searching for the bottle in the box.


    ¡± my feet will look like it¡¯s sprouting leaves¡±


    She whipped her head in my direction like what I just said was an utter abuse to Green nail polish industry.


    ¡°wow, alright then. What of pink?¡±


    ¡± Too girly¡±


    ¡± ck?¡±


    ¡± I¡¯m not Goth mom¡±


    ¡± Yellow?¡±


    ¡± My feet will out shine the sun ¡±


    ¡± Grey?, red??, white???¡±


    ¡± My feet would look like pencil did the work, Red looks a lot like blood and don¡¯t get me started on white, that color-¡±


    ¡°My heavens¡± My mom shouted with a smile on her face ¡± Pregnancy really brings out the truth in you ¡± a light smile gracing her lips.


    ¡± I know right? This is my first and myst¡± I pouted with a huff and folded my hands above my very swollen belly.


    ¡± you sure about that? You know, I was hoping to have at least five grand kidsing for a visit each Christmas ¡± mom said mimicking my posture with a smirk on her face.


    My mouth dropped to the floor.


    ¡°Mom!¡±


    ¡°yes sweetheart?¡± her smirk still persistent.


    ¡°I¡¯m not nning on having more kids, really ¡±


    Her expression falls as she realizes that I am being honest.


    ¡°why is that?¡± her brows creased with concern and concentration.


    ¡± well¡­, I was actually thinking about the baby, and then I was wondering who will want to get married to ady who carried a baby from a rape¡± ying with the hem of my shirt, i voiced out my thoughts.


    ¡± Honey, no matter what happened in the past, the future is a brighter day. The man who would love you will definitely be smart enough to overlook a mistake of the past ¡± Herhand resting on my thigh.


    ¡± But what if i do get married and bear kids for my husband, they wouldn¡¯t treat this baby the same way¡±


    ¡± Would you love this baby when he or she is born?¡± she asked looking me in the eye.


    ¡°yeah, yes I will¡±


    ¡°then you have nothing to worry about love¡± she gave my thigh asqueeze with an assuring smile.


    ¡± Now, so we know that white is a color we do not want to talk about, sooo¡­. here¡¯s what we¡¯re gonna do. I¡¯ll hand this box over to you ¡± she ces the box on myp ¡± And whichever color you pick at random is the color of your feet ¡±


    hmm, sounds like a good idea.


    ¡°you ready?¡± I nod in anticipation


    ¡°okay, eyes closed aaaaaand¡­¡­ go¡±


    And the shuffle begins !


    ¡± five, four, three, two, one. And the shuffle is over! show me the color ¡± even with my eyes closed I can tell from her voice the smile on her face.


    I pull out my fingers and opened my eyes my a millimeter.


    ¡± ringy, ding, ding and we have a winner. Pink it is!¡± after which she barked out aughter that had meughing too.


    Pink had always been my worst color.


    ¡°okay, okay¡­ another round. I am not wearing that on my feet¡± I managed to say betweenughter.


    ¡± Nah-uh you picked, not me¡± she was still mocking me.


    ¡°Mom!¡±


    Snap !


    ¡°ouch¡± I use my hand to grip my belly to relieve the cramping.


    ¡± you okay?¡± mom had stoppedughing at the point.


    ¡± Yeah, maybe. It was just a cramp¡±


    ¡°you have just six weeks to go right?¡±


    ¡± yup¡±


    ¡°hmmm¡­¡± she paused and looked at me for a moment ¡± for how long have you had these cramps?¡±


    Thinking back to the day Hunter threw me down when I told him about the pregnancy.


    ¡± Almost six months now¡±


    or more.


    ¡± Should we see a doctor?¡±


    ¡± No, ites and- oww !¡±


    snap ! snap !!


    ¡± Iris, you can¡¯t even sit up straight ¡±


    Taking deep breaths to ease the pain and it subdued a little.


    Setting my back straight and that was when i felt like something was torn open inside of me.


    SNAAAAAAP !!!


    ¡°aaaaaaaaah!, Mom! Hospital !¡±


    ¡°Oh my God, let me go get my keys¡± she scrambled off the floor and with the speed of light she was up the stairs.


    The pulling feeling was stretching and getting worse until when I felt something wet drip down my leg.


    With much energy and pain I opened my eyes that were squeezed shut to know what it was and i saw what made me scream.


    I¡¯m bleeding.


    oh my God my baby !


    ¡°Mom!!¡± my eyes filling with tears as I can only fear the worst.


    ¡± yes baby I¡¯m-Jesus Christ !¡± she quickened her pace down the flight. ¡± You¡¯re bleeding !, My God, My God,e on lets get to the doctor fast¡± sheys a hand on my back and the other below my knees to carry me bridal style.


    ¡°mama, my baby¡± my voice choked with silent tears.


    ¡°don¡¯t worry, your baby will be fine ¡±


    And she drove me to the hospital.


    $$$$$$


    ¡°is she okay?¡±


    ¡°yeah, she just needs to rest and she¡¯ll feel better ¡±


    ¡°how long will she be out?¡±


    ¡± she should be up any minute now¡±


    The voices in the room having a conversation was the first sound to greet me as i returned to consciousness.


    Thest thing I remember before being given a sedative was hearing my pregnancy is havingplications and due to my hyperventtion I have to be unconscious as they would have to remove the baby through a surgery.


    ¡± I think she¡¯s awake¡±


    ¡± Hallelujah, Iris, baby speak to me¡±


    Dad.


    My dad is here. That fluttering feeling is back again.


    ¡°Baby?¡± Dad calls again.


    ¡± Dad?¡± my voice low and cracked because of my dry troat.


    ¡°my goodness she¡¯s okay¡±


    Meredith?N?velDrama.Org ? content.


    Opening my eyes slowly, I¡¯m met with not only my Dad and Meredith.


    But also My mom, Megan, Clement and Mrs Phoebe.


    ¡± Are you alright?¡± This was Clement speaking.


    ¡± uh- uh. I am ¡±


    ¡± Good, because I need to pour a truckload on you. Just for a few days I go to stay with this moron here and his dad and you deemed it fit to go intobour? honestly if this isn¡¯t betrayal, I don¡¯t know what is¡±


    And the person with thoseforting words was none other than Megan my love.


    Wait !bour?


    That¡¯s when I looked to my stomach and noticed it wasn¡¯t swollen anymore.


    ¡± w-where¡¯s my b-baby?¡± Tears are definitely going to be shed if I¡¯m in for bad news.


    ¡± They¡¯re fine, let¡¯s get the nurse toe check you and then you¡¯ll go see them¡± mom patted my hair softly as she spoke.


    huh?


    ¡± Them?¡± confusion should have been clear on my face.


    ¡± Yeah, Iris, you were pregnant with twins ¡± Dad muttered with a smile on his face.


    ¡± Twins?¡±


    The news keeps unraveling.


    My question evokedughter from my mom as she nodded to confirm the information.


    ¡± But it hasn¡¯t been nine months yet¡±


    Someone exin to me in details.


    ¡± ording to the doctor, he said your immunity was too weak to carry a baby without the aid of supplements, but rather you were carrying two kids and your body snapped so you gave birth prematurely¡± Meredith exins and I feel a lot calm now.


    ¡°Mrs Phoebe?¡± I called out to her and I noticed a smile on Clement¡¯s face. ¡°How did you get to know?¡±


    ¡± Clement called as soon as he heard, of course I couldn¡¯t waste a second to be here¡± she took hold of my hand and gave a little squeeze.


    I pulled on a smile before running my hand over my stomach to feel the stitch.


    Another scar added by Hunter.


    A frown crosses my expression and I think mom knew the reason because she spoke up.


    ¡± The doctors said the scars of CS usually disappear after a month or so. Then you¡¯ll be as good as new ¡±


    Great, everyone is okay.


    But I need to see my babies.


    The door opens and a talldy whom I assume is the nurse steps in.


    After offering me a bright smile everyone made room on the bed for her to take my vitals.


    When she was done, she asked if we were ready to see the babies and without hesitation we all agreed and she led us out to the hallway, a few rooms away.


    Next we walked into a room with an incubating machine at the far end.


    No one needed to tell me twice to run for it, and I broke into a short sprint.


    Stopping at the ss screen I saw two olive skinned angels cuddled together and in somewhat a sound sleep.


    The two babies looked exactly identical even with their eyes closed.


    They used to grow inside of me.


    I don¡¯t know whether I was crying because I was happy, or because I was sad that I couldn¡¯t carry them till the end.


    But all I know is Megan walked up to me with a hand ced on my shoulder.


    ¡± Come on, suck it up babe. Bad bitches don¡¯t cry¡±


    Then the whole room burst intoughter.


    ¡± congrattions dear¡± the nurse popped in before theughter died down.


    And I¡­. Smiled.


    Congrattions to me !

 Chapter 28- UOK

    Mama you¡¯re okay now.


    You¡¯re safe now, okay.


    You¡¯re in a better ce now.


    I¡¯ll see you another day now.


    UOK- NASTY C


    Bonjour everyone!!


    Everyone, bonjour!!


    Why I¡¯m so happy?, well today is the twelfth day into the month of September and guess what?


    It¡¯s also my birthday.


    Give me an A!


    Hahaha. So much for beginning to take responsibility.


    Did I make mention that today was also the day I was allowed to take my babies home.


    Yay us!


    They¡¯ve finallypleted nine whole months!


    They¡¯re so grown up.


    *Sniffles tears*


    ¡± The earlier you realize that talking to a mirror is the first sign of insanity, the safer it is for Jan and June¡± Mom stated with a ghost smile on her face as she leaned against my door.


    Her signature silk nightgown still gracing her slender body.


    ¡°Mama you¡¯re a grandma!!¡± I jumped to face her with exasperation then ran to give her a bone crushing hug.


    ¡± Baby you¡¯re a mama!¡± She mimicked my tone but hugged me none the less ¡± Morning sweetheart ¡±


    ¡°Morning mom¡± My voice muffled due to the pressure I used to press my face onto her.


    ¡°And happy birthday dearie. I think nature¡¯s given you the best gift in two living, breathing packages¡± Her smile not faltering.


    And Iughed at her theory as true as it may seem.


    ¡± You excited on being a mom. I know I wasn¡¯t ¡± Her voice holding a smirk I could not see.


    ¡± Mom!!¡± raising my head from her body to look her in the eye.


    And hear her repeat that statement.


    ¡± Hey! I¡¯m kidding, don¡¯t go all monkey on me¡± Raising her hands in surrender.


    ¡± These days it¡¯s no longer called monkey ¡±


    ¡°What¡¯s thetest? Baboon?¡± Her hands dropping to her side and she gives me a weary look.


    ¡± Nope it¡¯s called ape shit ¡± shing the widest grin I¡¯ve got.


    ¡°Ape? Also belonging to the monkey family?¡±


    Monkey family?? That¡¯s it. We¡¯re all weird together.


    I broke away from her and went back to my bathroom mirror.


    ¡± I added a few poundstely ¡± I said observing curves on my body that we¡¯re non-existent till now.


    ¡°Few? Baby you look swollenpared to these past months¡±


    ¡± Mom! No girl likes being called fat!¡±


    ¡°I never called you fat, I said you look swollen¡± She shrugged like her words were equal to telling me the grass is green.


    ¡± Hmmmph¡± I pouted and turned back to the mirror to apply a little makeup.


    And by a little, I mean use a concealer to hide the scar on my forehead.


    Mom let out a brief chuckle and spoke up ¡± Let me go freshen up, then we can go pick the kids, sound ok?¡±


    The only reply I gave was a smile.


    ¡± Good, we¡¯ll stop by at Tucker¡¯s¡±


    ¡± We¡¯ll buy banana smoothies!!¡± I shrieked like a little girl.


    Life is shocking as it is.


    ¡± Nuh-uh youngdy, I¡¯m getting a banana smoothie, you need to go on a diet¡± She ced her hands on her hip and waited for a response.


    A response which no matter how reasonable won¡¯t change anything.


    ¡± Well then sd it is for you!¡± She shrieked in mockery of my tune and made her way out of my bedroom.


    And to think we¡¯re both mothers.


    ??????


    ¡± Muchacho!!!¡±


    ¡± Tucker!! ¡± It¡¯s been ages since I¡¯ve seen this rounded bellied man.


    ¡°You guys know each other?¡± Mom asked surprised by our exchange.


    ¡± Of course! This littled here was my best employee, well till she disappeared without trace¡± Hisst words came with a re towards my direction.


    ¡± Long story Tucker ¡± I whined at my bad behavior.


    ¡± Cut it short¡± He red again.


    ¡± Clement will do a lot better exnation than I would ¡± I took a seat at the counter and mom copied my movement, still choosing not to join our conversation.


    ¡± So he was in on this?¡± He faked a hurt emotion and ced his hand on his heart.


    ¡± What? No! I kinda exined it to him¡±


    ¡± So you tell him every thing now eh?¡± Tucker wriggled his brows at hisment.


    I groaned in frustration. I really just want to bring my babies home.


    ¡± Two banana smoothies please ¡± I ordered


    ¡± Ehm, one banana smoothie and a te of vegetable sd, she needs to tonne down on the carbs. ¡±


    So now was the best time to speak up.


    I couldn¡¯t hide my pout and it caused mom and Tucker tough at me.


    ¡± Her mom, finally nice to meet you ¡± Tucker said extending his hand for a shake which was returned before retreating to get our orders.


    A few seconds of silence and mom opened up again.


    ¡± Sooo¡­.. Is this why you never collected our money? You had your own source ?¡±


    ¡± Yup, but I don¡¯t work here anymore. I don¡¯t need it¡± I replied gleefully but she didn¡¯t seem too happy about it.


    ¡± You ok Mom?¡±


    ¡°Yeah, I was just thinking of all you had to go through when your dad and I were being too stupid. You never collected cash from us and we never cared how you catered for yourself. I¡¯m really sorry pumpkin. Your Dad and I both ¡±


    ¡± It¡¯s okay. We¡¯re alright now arent we?¡±


    ¡± Sure we are!¡± She responded in a jolly tune and gave me the biggest smile she could ever muster.


    And I smiled back.


    ¡± Where¡¯s dad?¡± I asked remembering I hadn¡¯t seen him all day.


    ¡± He¡¯s getting stuffs ready for when we return with the kids. Kinda a little party. His idea not mine¡± She shrugged.


    I really just realized where my apathy for social events came from. She literally hates anything to do with three people.


    ¡± It¡¯s okay. It¡¯ll be fun by the way¡± I offered her another smile.


    ¡± Soooo¡­¡±


    Another so?


    ¡± Uhun?¡±


    Spill momma.


    ¡± You tell Clement everything right?¡± Her smile slowly transforming into a smirk.


    ¡± You too!!¡± I groaned again.


    ¡± What? It won¡¯t kill to let your mom in on some little secrets ¡±


    She literally sounds like a high school blond right now.


    ¡± Really mom, you guys-¡±


    ¡± Order up!!¡± Tucker came back with a tray of sd and smoothie. And handed my mom the smoothie.


    BETRAYALS EVERYWHERE!!


    ¡± You really got me a sd?¡±


    ¡± Yup chap. Your mom¡¯s right, you look like a tanned bloom¡±


    Bloom?!! What the?!!


    ¡± You guys are sworn betrayals!¡±


    They rather found my outburst hrious.


    And I hungrily munched away on my sd.


    Healthy or not, I was starving.


    Mom and Tucker got into a light conversation on my time here while I ate away, and from the look of things I think Mom is happy that I was in good hands.


    Their conversation going smooth whilst she¡¯s taking sips of her order, till a phone call interrupts her discussion.


    ¡± Hey sweetie ¡± So I believe it¡¯s Dad.


    A moment of silence from her and she ends the call.


    ¡± Uhmm, Iris darling I¡¯ve gotta go do something real quick, don¡¯t leave till I¡¯m back ¡± Her words sounding like she¡¯s straining.


    ¡± Any problem? I could help¡± I¡¯m starting to get worried though.


    ¡± Nah, just a little issue with dad. I¡¯ll be back ¡± She nts a kiss on my forehead and whispers something to Tucker to which he nods and spares me a look.


    A little wave and she was out the door.


    ¡± So do you mind giving a helping hand as you wait? For old times sake ¡± He asked with a sheepish grin knowing fully well that I won¡¯t give a no for an answer.


    ¡ª¡ª-


    It¡¯s seven PM at night and Mom hasn¡¯t returned. I¡¯m really starting to get a feeling.


    ¡± What did she say when she was leaving ?¡± I shouted to Tucker who was picking up bottles from a nearby table in an almost bustling restaurant while I served the other.


    ¡± No details given, just I should help keep you busy so you don¡¯t leave ¡± He too looked as much as confused as I was.


    I sighed. So much for leaving me on my birthday.


    ¡± Tucker, I wanna go home¡± Sadness slowly seeping into my emotion.


    ¡± You okay kid?¡±


    ¡± Yeah, just wanna go lie down ¡± I handed over my apron as he just smiled and gave me a pat on the head.


    ¡± Wait for me at the entrance kid¡±I nodded and stood by the door for him.


    The juke box ying a song I got familiar with due to my days here.


    ¡± Here you go ¡± He came back and slipped a banana smoothie into my hand.


    ¡± What for?¡± I couldn¡¯t help but grin at the sugary treat in my grip.


    ¡± Don¡¯t let your mama know alright? Happy birthday my lil girl ¡± He said and gave an embrace.


    ¡± You-you remembered?¡±


    ¡± What you should ask me is if I¡¯ll ever forget ¡±


    I chuckled at his petinence.


    ¡± Thank you ¡±


    ¡± It¡¯s really the least I can do¡±


    We pulled apart and I took my way.


    My way to the hospital.


    =======


    ¡°Good evening Mrs Keller¡± I hopped into the hospital reception with a simple look on my face.


    ¡± Uh- Heyy Iris, w-what are you doing here?¡± She was stuttering and that is not at all a good sign.


    Was dad involved in an ident?Content property of N?velDra/ma.Org.


    ¡± Looking at the time I was meant to be here earlier, you know. To pick up the kids?¡±


    It¡¯s already a few minutes to nine, I assumed I waste.


    ¡± Err- yeah. Give me just a minute ¡± And she ran out the back door.


    Well that was a strange encounter.


    I took a seat in the waiting room and sent momvoicemail since she wasn¡¯t picking her calls.


    At least to inform her that I¡¯m getting the kids alone.


    I literally waited and fumbled with my phone for exactly two hours and now it¡¯s past eleven.


    What exactly is going on!?


    I ain¡¯t waiting for anyone anymore.


    I got up and barged through the back door.


    Few flight of stairs and some turns I arrived at the incubation room. Funny enough the room is empty but I can still see a figure in the farthest bed.


    I walked over to the minifort at the end of the hall and saw one of my babies lying there with eyes wide open.


    I believe this is the girl¡­ Let me confirrrrm that.


    Yup. Definitely the girl.


    Her eyes were deep blue and shiny, particrly reminding me of someone.


    Yeah, her Dad.


    But that didn¡¯t matter. She was beautiful with curly ck hair and tiny pink lips.


    Come to think of it, all her traits we¡¯re her dad¡¯s. Well you could say the ck hair was mine too cause that was something we had inmon.


    She made a little gurgling sound that pulls me out of my ck out inparing she and her dad.


    And now she looks like she¡¯s about to go down in tears.


    ¡± Hey, not when mommy is here¡± I picked her up and I still had the exact same feelings I got when I carried them for the first time.


    She nestled her head to the crook of my neck andy quiet while I gave her soft pats on the back.


    Now to find your brother.


    Mom already gave them names she¡¯d love to call them.


    June and Jan.


    So¡­ Now to find Jan.


    I walked out of the room and was just following a straight path.


    After a few steps before I even begin to hear snoresing off my shoulder and realize that June has slept off.


    The way she gripped onto me like I¡¯m her lifeline was enough to bring a smile to my face.


    So that¡¯s the joy of motherhood.


    But slightly, panic finds it¡¯s way to my heart again.


    Where is Jan?


    I take a left turn at a T path to continue my search in the rooms when I hear a voice that puts me at unease.


    ¡± Try again!!¡±


    Mom?


    And the voice ising from the right path. I quickly change my course and head the other way.


    First door.


    Nothing.


    Second door.


    Still nothing.


    Third¡­.


    ¡°I¡¯m sorry¡­¡­¡± A long pause from the voice I presume to be the doctor ¡± But we lost him¡±


    Lost who!?


    Oh my God! Dad!!


    I pushed the door open and was met with a surgery ward.


    ¡± Mom what happened to_ Dad?¡±


    Dad was rather, standing there with shock written all over his face and so did everyone else.


    By everyone else I¡¯m referring to mom who has tears all over her face alongside Megan and Meredith.


    ¡± What¡¯s going on?¡±


    The answer to my question was silence. But now to ask more thriving issues.


    ¡± Where¡¯s Jan?¡±


    The doctor and my dad exchanged looks like they we¡¯re having a mind battle on who should speak up but finally the doctor sighed and started.


    ¡°Jan is¡­ Uhm¡­¡±


    ¡± Uhun?¡±


    ¡± I¡¯m sorry but Jan is no more ¡± He couldn¡¯t keep eye contact with me as he said that.


    And that was what made me just think that just maybe, he was joking.


    ¡± It¡¯s not funny ¡± I red at him trying to pull off a prank on me with total fail.


    ¡± Miss Shawn please calm down ¡±


    ¡± Calm down!?, calm down!??¡­ You practically just pulled the worst joke in the history ofedy and you¡¯re telling me to calm down!?.. I ask you again, WHERE- IS- MY- BABY!!?¡±I snapped.


    This is in no way funny, and why is everyone keeping sober faces? Are they all in on this n too? Is this what they upied themselves with today? A way to hurt me?


    I didn¡¯t realize I was already in tears till I felt snot thickening at the back of my nose.


    ¡± Miss Shawn, I¡¯m really sorry but I have not lied to you. We lost him¡± The doctor sounded really remorseful that it would be hard not to believe.


    Then I saw the nurse at the reception near the bed that stood in the middle of the room. Her face holding nothing but pity.


    Then it hit me like a ton of bricks.


    Mom left because she knew.


    Dad called because he knew too.


    Megan and Meredith are here because they¡¯re aware too.


    And the nurse was also aware and that¡¯s why she was acting odd.


    I was the only one who didn¡¯t.


    The one one who didn¡¯t know my baby boy is dead.


    The tears ran a full river down my face.


    ¡± How?¡± I asked while a gaping feeling stood in my heart.


    ¡± Having been born prematurely, his immunity tends to be weak and would process a lot slower. But when his heart rate began to slow its pace we saw it as a red light, so we observed after prescribing some medications and the rate kept reducing till we tried everything possible. Even the shock dtor couldn¡¯t bring him back. We are sorry ¡± The doctor exined as his hand goes to the back of June whom I just remembered I¡¯m carrying on me.


    Summary of his exnation.


    I killed him.


    If I wasn¡¯t so weak, they could have been born normal without difficulties.


    ¡± What of her?¡± I was referring to June in my arms.


    ¡± Same thing happened to her, but she fought and survived. She¡¯s a strong girl ¡± He said while trying to smile but couldn¡¯t.


    I lost him without getting to know him. Without him being able to call me mom. Without being able to love me as much as I loved him.


    This was when everyone around came over to console me. My heart feels like a big part was just set aze.


    ¡± Can- can I see him ¡± I asked the white coated doctor and he gave me a brief nod.


    I walked over to the bed and saw him lying there.


    Without life.


    He was also the exact replica of Hunter, even with nose structure.


    I couldn¡¯t help but smile at him.


    Maybe this was better for him.


    He doesn¡¯t need to see how cruel the world is. How wicked people can be.


    Especially his own dad.


    At least he¡¯s okay now. He¡¯s safe.


    He¡¯s in a better ce.


    This isn¡¯t the end. We¡¯ll surely meet at the other side of life. Maybe then I can tell him how much I loved him despite all odds.


    I took his tiny hand in mine and held it firm while staring at his face.


    Up till today they never opened their eyes. I had seen June¡¯s beautiful blue eyes but I never got to see Jan¡¯s.


    I let go of his hand and lifted one of his closed eyelids.


    His eyes were brown. Just like mine.


    I never knew I had more tears in me till this point.

 Chapter 29- I believe

    ¡®tough times don¡¯tst


    But tough people do ¡®


    I BELIEVE ¨C DJ KHALED FT DEMI LOVATO.


    I was back at the reception area sitting quietly with hopes of waking up any moment from this nightmare.


    Mom helped me walk out of the room as the doctor began removing appliances and connections attached to Jan¡¯s body. And I was in no mood to argue.


    Dad was sitting by my side all this while as I held onto him forfort.


    I had already asked him quite a number of times if I was dreaming but I received a negative reply. Then I changed my course.


    I asked if he was dreaming instead.


    Trying hard not tough, he also gratified me with a negative answer.


    So I epted my fate and maintained silence.


    Except if this is Mom¡¯s dream though.


    Megan said Clement couldn¡¯t make it cause his dad and uncle had a business meeting to attend so they needed him and his cousin to take care of the little ones and his uncles wife.


    Majorly cause his uncle doesn¡¯t trust thepetence of his own son.


    Meredith collected June from me a while ago and she¡¯s still asleep on her shoulders.


    I couldn¡¯t help but watch the little baby like she¡¯s gonna give up on life soon.


    Like her brother did.


    Like i almost did.


    ¡± Dad?¡±


    ¡± Yes darling?¡± Sounding bewildered that I could actually speak.


    ¡± How did you guys get to know?¡±


    ¡± Know?¡± Raising his left brow in emphasis.


    ¡± Know about the babies, you know¡­ The problem ¡±


    ¡± Well, I was out with Meredith and Megan cause I had no idea what teenage girls would want for a ¡®decent¡¯ party so I called them to help me out.


    We were at the mall getting some stuffs when a call came in from the hospital saying it¡¯s an emergency. So I called your mom and exined to her on phone about my whereabouts. That¡¯s how we all ended up here¡±


    His exnation was suitable enough so I went back to my silence.


    Megan just walked in from outside where I believe she was making a call.


    ¡± Hey you, put a smile on that shimmy face¡± And she stretches her lips apart with her fingers.


    I for one decided to smile a little but her action caused everyone around tough.


    ¡± I¡¯m gonna go back to bridge waters tomorrow¡± She piped up and I responded with a smile.


    She¡¯s been here for far too long for my sake, the least I can do is to let her go. It¡¯s not like she takes her online schooling seriously.


    Seeing my reaction was one she was looking for, she smiled back.


    I heard shufflinging out from the backroom before my mom appeared with the doctor.


    Believe me when I say mom looks worse than I do. And I¡¯m the bereaved.


    ¡± All cleaned up and taken abat¡± The doctor said in a professional tone while avoiding my eyes.


    I think that abat is a code for buried.


    Every one gave a response of thanks, thank you and alright but I still kept shut.


    ¡± Miss Shawn ¡± The doctor addressed me as I hummed indicating he¡¯s got my attention.


    ¡± You¡¯ll be alright ¡± He gave me a small smile and a brief nod to my mom before walking out.


    Mom still stood a far distance from where I was, afraid ofing close or something.


    ¡± Honey?¡± Dad called to her maybe realizing the fragile mood she¡¯s in.


    ¡± Iris has suffered too much for such a young age ¡± Was her reply to the call.


    You can say that again.


    ¡± Come sit first ¡± Dad is still trying to persuade her to calm down but she was in no mood for it. She wants to speak and she will.


    ¡± I ain¡¯t sitting, listen to me. Ever since we¡¯ve moved here everything has been going bad for our baby, you and I know it¡±


    ¡± What are you trying to say?¡± Dad asked, curiositycing his voice.


    ¡± What I¡¯m saying is, it¡¯s time she left this ce to another to start a new life. A ce where she¡¯ll experience more love than she has ever seen. This town will hold nothing more than terrible memories of the past ¡±


    We¡¯re moving?


    We didn¡¯t even have enough at hand to buy a new house talk less leaving.


    Ever since they quit their jobs, the new ones they got paid slightly less than half of what they earned before. It wasn¡¯t enough at the mean time to settle somewhere else.


    Dad joined a car dealing organization whereas mom began working at a mall. Not the best ces to earn much in this town.


    From the silence Dad gave it was pretty obvious he was considering the options too.


    ¡± Please darling. Let¡¯s do this for iris and the little baby¡± Mom wasn¡¯t making saying no an easy option.


    ¡± But mom, how do you intend to go about the funds?¡±


    ¡± Exactly the same thing I was thinking ¡± Dad finally popped his silence.


    ¡± I have an idea¡±


    That was Megan speaking, after she was sure she had all our focus she continued.


    ¡± What if Iris goes with me back to Bridgewaters? I mean she always loved the ce before she left am I right?¡±


    Bridgewaters!! How could I not think of that!


    ¡± My heavens Megan you¡¯re brilliant!!¡± Guess mom also found the idea spectacr.


    ¡± Well, I think the new n is for Iris to move back with Megan and after we get enough cash we join in and get settled ¡± Dad¡¯s n rounded the circle all up.


    But there is only one problem.


    Two actually.


    Meredith and Clement.


    I turned to look at Meredith to show how sorry I am to really leave but her reaction slowed me down.


    ¡± No, don¡¯t give me that ¡®I¡¯m sorry , I can stay if you want eyes¡¯ you¡¯re going and it¡¯s final. I got Clement to kick his butt by the way, just keep in touch okay?¡±


    I couldn¡¯t help it. I ran to give her a hug. Well a side hug so I won¡¯t crush the baby.


    ¡± Yeah yeah, you love me. I know ¡±


    ¡°Jeez, Meredith. Cocky much¡± That wasing from me and honestly I surprised myself too.


    I never expected to smile again tonight but these people proved me wrong.


    ¡± Lets go home shall we?¡±


    _____


    ¡± Okay, soooo¡­¡­ Happy birthday baby¡± Dad said as he opened the front door to reveal a slightly decorated living room.


    ¡± And farewell to the pug town ¡± Added Megan.


    ¡± Hey, people live here¡± Meredith counters Megan but her being who she is only stuck out her tongue.


    To which Meredith mimicked.


    Weughed at their little bickering and stepped in.


    Some balloons and shimmers were spread every where like a five year old princess themed party.


    That exins a lot to why Dad had to call in for help.


    ¡± Wow Tom, when I said this party will make her want to relive the moment I didn¡¯t mean literally relive age six¡± Mom mocked as she observed the environment.


    ¡± This is not my thing okay. I tried so be grateful ¡± Dad pouted and earned a pat on the head from mom.


    After giggling at the movie unfolding before me I took a brief excuse to keep June on a bed. A sleeping baby isn¡¯t really the lightest thing to carry.N?velDrama.Org ? content.


    Up the stairs were a trail of rose petals and chocte candy leading to my room.


    So dad has a romantic side too.


    I chuckled quietly to myself at the silly thought and opened my bedroom door.


    Exactly as I left it this morning, except for a box sitting on my bed.


    I walked over gently to the other side of the bed andid June down softly and covered her with the baby nket I got for them.


    I turned to the box and guessed it was a present from someone so I opened it up.


    There were a few things inside of it . A really oversized looking gray cardigan, a sundress, a locket, a picture frame of my family and I, a bedtime story book for kids, then a photo album that says babies on the front cover. No doubt these are all gifts from all the people I care about.


    A smile came to my face once again as I packed up the box and went back down the stairs.


    Everyone was holding a s of wine and when I got there Meredith handed me one too.


    ¡± I would like to make a toast ¡± Dad¡¯s voice coated with pride.


    ¡± To my baby Iris, for clocking another year and for being the strongest and sweetestdy I know ¡±


    That toast earned a ¡®hey¡¯ from mom but no one paid attention. All I could hear afterwards was the chattering of ¡®to Iris¡¯ and the clicking of sses.


    So moving away is finally the end of it all.


    Really it¡¯s true. Tough times don¡¯tst, but tough people do.

 Chapter 30- Start again

    ¡®can I just turn back the clock,


    Forgive my sins.


    I just wanna roll my sleeves up,


    And start again¡¯


    START AGAIN- ONEREPUBLIC FT LOGIC


    HUNTER¡¯S P. O. V


    ¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª


    ¡± I still can¡¯t believe you left lovelyn with that Zoe girl ¡± Dn eximed as he made his way into the kitchen.


    I on the other hand was on the couch, watching this movie that he picked out saying it was fun.


    And I regret leaving him to make the choices.


    ¡± Well the girl has always been disturbing me for a favor she owes me and I seized the opportunity ¡± I shrugged


    ¡± Did you just call handing over your little sister to aplete stranger an opportunity?¡± He emerged from the kitchen with a new bowl of popcorn and a root beer.


    ¡± Of course it is. Especially with that Helen girl that called to say she¡¯s stopping by tonight ¡±


    ¡± It¡¯s Karen who called, and for heaven sakes where in carnation is your mom?¡± He took a seat by my side on the couch and took a swig of his drink.


    ¡± Karen, Helen, Selena.. So far as they¡¯re a good fuck it¡¯s all that matters ¡± Taking a handful of popcorn and continued speaking.


    ¡± I took my mom over to the physiotherapist so I can have tonight all to myself ¡°.


    With a mouthful I finished my speech clearly making sure a few pieces of the treat fell unto his arm.


    ¡± In all ramifications, you disgust me!¡± He scrunched up his nose and threw himself of the chair to the ground .


    I chuckled at his childishness and made sure to finish what I had in my mouth before speaking again.


    ¡± You act like you¡¯ve never gottenid before ¡± Still holding back a chuckle.


    ¡± Well there¡¯s the difference between you and I, I learnt to keep my d*ck in store ¡± His eyes never leaving the television screen.


    ¡± Now where¡¯s the fun in that?¡±I got up from my position to go get my own popcorn and root beer.


    ¡± The assurance that I won¡¯t catch an STD before the age of thirty ¡± He stated like he was stating the obvious.


    ¡± Ha ha, very funny ¡± I went into the kitchen to search for another drink in the fridge when the doorbell went off.


    And Dn being the guard dog for the two of us decided to answer it as I heard a click open.


    ¡± You¡¯re not Karen ¡± Was the first thing the idiot said to her.


    Is he trying to send her away?


    ¡± Yeah I know, I¡¯m Vanessa. He invited me over tonight, or is he expecting someone else?¡± Her voice sounded sexy and familiar but I can¡¯t really remember a Vanessa.


    ¡± What? No, sorry forgive my manners. I was expecting a Karen for myself not him. Come in please ¡±


    I heard shufflinging from nearby indicating she followed him in, but the fact we had a visitor wasn¡¯t enough to keep Dn hushed for the mean time cause he barged into the kitchen secondster.


    ¡± Do you remember this one, huh?¡± He whisper yelled.


    I had to admit it he looks really funny trying to scold me in hushed tones, so Iughed at him.


    The re he sent me could send me seven feet deeper into hell but I¡¯m really used to it.


    Ignoring my search for any more food, I went to meet whatever her name is.


    Looks like I¡¯m eating something else tonight.


    Dn was about to follow me again to keep hisins up but a phone call pulled him back.


    After ncing at his phone screen he sent me a re.


    ¡± You¡¯re lucky this call is more important than you¡¯ll ever be ¡± And he walked out to the backyard.


    Family huh?


    I left my current position and went back to the living room to see her watching that boring movie.


    And from appearance she looks really hot. I think she¡¯s the girl I met at a club two weeks ago.


    ¡± Hey¡± I pulled her mind off the television.


    ¡± Hi, how have you been?¡± She stood up from her sitting position and walked up to me before cing a chaste kiss on my lips.


    So she¡¯s the starting type.


    I gripped her hair and pulled her back to my lips to repeat the kiss again.


    Meh, she¡¯s not really the best kisser I¡¯ve met.


    I bit her lip to initiate a little tongue and sheplied without hesitation.


    Tonight is going to get a little more interesting.


    The kiss got a lot more heated and I felt my d*ck twitch in my pants.


    ¡± You wanna go upstairs?¡± I asked her, my voice sounding a lot breathy.


    But she nodded and I picked her up in such a way she was straddling me. Not breaking from the kiss I made for my room.


    I opened the door, marched in and shut it behind us. Then wended on the bed.


    At this point I was rock hard and I began grinding on her sensitive area.


    Her grip on my shoulder tightens and her legs wrapped around my waist, she releases a soft moan before pushing herself up to achieve more contact.


    That was enough sign to tell me to grind harder and I did.


    I put my hand under her shirt and bra to pinch and pull her nipple as I ced kisses and hickey¡¯s all over her slender neck.


    Her moans were getting louder and giving me more reason to be grateful that mom wasn¡¯t home at the moment.


    Next she went for the seam of my shirt to pull it off.


    Seems her patience limit has been attained.


    I smiled through kisses at her eagerness and was about to lift myself up so she could have her way, when the door bursted open.


    Note to self. Keep your door locked in case of next time with Dn.


    ¡± Dude! What¡¯s your-¡± He didn¡¯t let me finish speaking before he started talking.


    ¡± Vanessa, pick yourself up and leave. I need a talk with this thing ¡± His eyes narrowing on me as she scrambles to leave the room.


    Only then did i see the deadly expression on his face.


    ¡± Couz? You okay?¡± I still stayed on the bed because he looks like he could get violent any second.


    ¡± Do you remember a girl they call Iris?¡± His voice calm now but this was just the calm before the storm.


    Iris? Is that what this is about?


    ¡± That whore? Yeah I think I should ¡± I shrugged and waited to see why I was cock blocked cause of her.


    And if it¡¯s a stupid reason, she¡¯s gonna be seeing me at school tomorrow.


    ¡± The whore that you deflowered!¡± Why is he screaming?


    ¡± Why the hell am I being disturbed about that thing ¡± This is getting on my nerves right now to be fucking honest.N?velDrama.Org ? content.


    He took deep breaths to calm himself before he continued.


    ¡± I just got a call from Megan ¡±


    ¡°That your hot new step sister?¡±


    ¡± She said they were at the hospital ¡± Clearly avoiding my remarks.


    They?


    ¡± What does this have to do with Shawn?¡± No connections so far.


    ¡± If you¡¯d keep silent and listen you¡¯d have gotten to hear that she was at the hospital because of her. That ¡®whore¡¯ was pregnant for you and now Iris just lost a baby, they-¡±


    ¡°Hold up!¡± I shouted and raised a hand to stop him.


    ¡± What do you mean just lost?,st I checked babies grew and were given birth to within nine months. I clearly remember fucking that bitch almost nine months ago if not more and when she told me she was pregnant I told her to get rid of it. So what do you mean just lost?¡± His exnation should better be clear.


    ¡± That¡¯s the clear cut difference between a human and a jerk such as you. Iris couldn¡¯t kill innocence for nothing so she kept it plus she could have died trying tomit an abortion.¡± His words sound like another level of discussion.


    ¡± How did you get to know Shawn this much?¡±


    ¡± She¡¯s my step sister¡¯s best friend from the other town. My point is she just lost a baby, and you¡¯re bothered on how I got to know her?¡± His brow raising in confusion.


    ¡± Yes, because I see no reason why you¡¯d bother yourself with such a low life¡±


    ¡± Hunter, you raped an innocent girl and she gave birth for you. Now she lost a kid and you¡¯re more concerned about why I care about her!?¡± I could literally see venom drip from his words.


    ¡± Why should I care if she lost the baby, I told her to abort it way back if she had listened to me none-¡± He cuts me short to speak again.


    ¡± She could have lost her life!¡± He screamed at the top of his voice.


    ¡± Not my issue, she decides to keep a memory of her whoring lifestyle then she should be ready to face consequences ¡±


    He stared at me for aplete thirty seconds saying nothing before his brain gave him the words of English.


    ¡± You know what, forget feeling remorseful. You¡¯ve finally seeded in sending her away. But listen to me, one day you¡¯ll look back on what you did and wish for nothing more but to start again ¡±


    And with that he stepped out of my room.


    ¡ª¡ª THE?END ¡ª¡ª


    The Novel will be updated first on this website. Come back and


    continue reading tomorrow, everyone!