《Octopus Man Extras》 Chillaxing for a Few Seconds A steaming pile of freshly baked biscuits sat atop a table in the middle of John¡¯s cozy living room. In the room was John himself and his best friend Kookakoo, chillaxing on the sofa watching the anime adaptation of ¡°Demon Babe¡±, a very well written a masterful piece of fiction. ¡°Hey John, do you think this show will get another season after this one ends?¡± Kookakoo asked, glancing over at him. ¡°SSSSH DON¡¯T CALL ME BY MY REAL NAME!¡± John barked. Kookakoo flinched a bit and looked down sadly. ¡°But I thought you were okay with me saying your name.¡± She mumbled, feeling dejected. John patted Kookakoo on the head and replied. ¡°It¡¯s not because of you. It¡¯s because we¡¯re being watched.¡± He explained. ¡±By who?¡± Kookakoo asked with a gasp of shock. ¡°The Five Man Trio!¡± Octopus Man replied. Kookakoo screamed at the top of her lungs. ¡°NOT THEM!¡± She shouted, clinging to John in fear. ¡±Worry not my dear Kookakoo, for I am Octopus Man!¡± John declared, pulling his trusty octopus plush and red blanket cape out from out of his pocket dimension. After putting the two on he stood up and struck a heroic pose. Kookakoo looked up at him, her eyes sparkling in admiration. ¡±Can I come too?¡± She asked with a huge smile on her face. ¡°Of course! You are my bestie after all.¡± ¡±WAHOOO!¡± Kookakoo shouted, jumping for joy. Catalina, the adorable shape-shifting black Labrador, came out of the woodworks and barked to get Octopus Man¡¯s attention. Kookakoo heard the bark and looked over. ¡°Oh Catalina, where have you been?¡± Octopus Man shook his head and put a hand on her shoulder. ¡°She¡¯s been working with wood at the woodworks, don¡¯t you know anything?¡± ¡±Oh yeah.¡± Kookakoo said to herself, realizing how painfully obvious the answer was. I mean, it was right there in front of her face. ¡±HURRY LET¡¯S GO BEFORE THEY DESTROY THE UNIVERSE!¡± Octopus Man shouted as he began to run out the front door. With a nod, Kookakoo followed, as did Catalina. The turbulent trio made their way to face off again the evil trio. The one of five people. As they ran, Kookakoo asked a rather unimportant question. ¡°Hey John, where is the trio anyway?¡± ¡±At the center of the Earth!¡± Octopus Man replied. Kookakoo realized what the trio must have been doing there almost immediately. ¡°You mean they are going to¡­¡± but before she could finish, Octopus Man cut her off. ¡°Yes, they are going to steal all of the biscuits in the world, which will no doubt cause the end of the universe!¡± ¡±THEN WE NEED TO HURRY!¡± Kookakoo screamed. Octopus Man nodded and the three of them ran even faster than before. They ran around the surface of the Earth 6,000 times until Octopus Man came to an abrupt halt, causing Kookakoo and Catalina to stop behind him. ¡±What¡¯s wrong?¡± Kookakoo asked, tilting her head a bit. ¡°I just realized something. Running around the planet won¡¯t help us. We need to get to the center of the Earth.¡± Octopus Man stated. If you come across this story on Amazon, it''s taken without permission from the author. Report it. ¡°Kookakoo put her finger to her chin to contemplate Octopus Man¡¯s statement. ¡°Ooooh yeah. But one problem. Which way was the center of the Earth again?¡± She asked. ¡±I think it was up.¡± Octopus Man responded. ¡°Sounds right!¡± Kookakoo replied with a smile. Catalina sighed and transformed into a drill and started drilling downwards. Octopus Man and Kookakoo looked shocked and turned to each other with perplexed expressions. ¡°What is Catalina doing?¡± Kookakoo asked. Octopus Man shrugged and replied, ¡°Who knows. That dog has a mind of its own. Let¡¯s go to the center of the Earth without her.¡± ¡±Yeah!¡± Kookakoo enthusiastically responded. The two of them began to fly upwards in search of the center of the Earth. The drill-shaped Catalina continued to dig through the crust of the Earth and began to feel a very warm sensation. ¡°Woof woof bark awoo!¡± She said, which roughly translates to, ¡°I think I¡¯m close!¡± she dug and dug, the heat only growing more intense by the second. It was painful, but she couldn¡¯t give up. This was for biscuits, and the universe or whatever. Closer and closer, and once Catalina finally reached the center of the Earth, there was nothing there. Just an empty hole. Catalina reverted back into her dog form and looked around, confused. Meanwhile, in the vacuum of space, 4 septillion lightyears away, Octopus Man and Kookakoo found themselves in front of a massive rock that was just floating there. ¡±Welp, here it is. The center of the Earth.¡± Octopus Man stated with his hands on his hips. ¡°I knew we could do it!¡± Kookakoo exclaimed. ¡±OR SO YOU THOUGHT!¡± A voice shouted. Octopus Man and Kookakoo looked up to see the one speaking. It was Lord Williamth, the sole member of The Five Man Trio. He had brown hair, and his shirt and pants were all cheese colored. ¡±IT¡¯S YOU! MY RIVAL BACK IN KATHMANDU!¡± Octopus Man snarled. ¡°Indeed. I remember how pathetic you were trying to get into the championships. It was laughable.¡± Lord Williamth taunted. ¡±JOHN, YOU NEVER TOLD ME YOU TRIED TO JOIN THE CHAMPIONSHIPS!¡± Kookakoo exclaimed. With a sigh, Octopus Man looked away. ¡°It was a tough time for me. I was never good at cheese crusades, but I gave it my all. But anyway, that¡¯s in the past.¡± Octopus Man explained before turning his attention back to Lord Williamth. ¡°Why are you doing this now? That was back when I was a wee lad and you beat me in the cheese crusades anyway!¡± ¡±Oh I just like seeing you suffer, and taking away biscuits is definitely the best way to do so.¡± Lord Williamth taunted. Octopus Man gritted his teeth and shouted, ¡°But didn¡¯t you already get what you wanted? You won the lifetime supply of cheese!¡± ¡±Ha! What I wanted? I never wanted the cheese. I just wanted to make you mad because I hate your haircut. I know how precious biscuits are to you, so that is another thing I¡¯ll take.¡± Lord Williamth said before laughing maniacally. Octopus Man was about to burst into tears seeing Lord Williamth stand on top of the center of the Earth. If he were to destroy it, it would instantly remove all biscuits, which is common knowledge. Kookakoo gave Octopus Man a reassuring hug and said, ¡°Don¡¯t worry! Even if all the biscuits are gone and the universe ceases to exist, I¡¯m still here.¡± ¡±I DON¡¯T CARE ABOUT THAT! I WANT BISCUITS!¡± Octopus Man cried. ¡°Yeah fair enough, so do I.¡± Kookakoo said, also bursting into tears. ¡°HOW CAN WE LIVE WITHOUT BISCUITS?¡± They wailed simultaneously. Lord Williamth continued to laugh as they cried in anguish. He raised his fist and was preparing to strike the center of the Earth, however, Octopus Man noticed a tiny piece of space dust floating next to him which caused him to stop crying. He quickly picked up the nigh microscopic piece of dust and hurled it at Lord Williamth. This caused him to combust into a trillion pieces. ¡±Got him.¡± Octopus Man said heroically. Kookakoo wiped away her tears and gave Octopus Man a high-five. ¡°WE DID IT!¡± She shouted. ¡±Actually I did and you did jack squat, but that¡¯s neither here nor there.¡± Octopus Man stated bluntly. Kookakoo just giggled obliviously. Two seconds later, the two were back at their home, enjoying biscuits now that there was nothing to fear. ¡°I¡¯m sleepy. I¡¯m gonna go to sleep because I¡¯m sleepy and want to sleep.¡± Kookakoo said in the least redundant way possible. ¡°Okay. Goodnight Kookakoo!¡± Octopus Man said, but she was already zonked out and snoring. This sight caused Octopus Man to giggle to himself a bit, but then a realization set in. ¡°Where is Catalina?¡± Meanwhile at Catalina¡¯s funeral, Boomerang was giving the eulogy. ¡°She was always a good dog. Too bad she was burnt to a crisp while trying to find the center of the Earth.¡± ¡°Eh it¡¯s probably nothing¡± Octopus Man said to himself with a shrug as he continued to watch TV while Kookakoo was sleeping next to him. The age old question "I''m just saying. Pizza is wet." Octopus Man said, sitting at a table with Kookakoo, Floran, and Brazilian Bug Boy. "No way dumbass! Pizza pizzas things, just like how water waters things. It''s not wet it just has the property of being pineapple." Kookakoo retorted. "I agree with Kookakoo." Brazilian Bug Boy stated, chiming into this heated debate. Floran just sat there with a perplexed look on her face. "What in the name of the almighty elohim are you guys even talking about?" Floran asked. Octopus Man turned to Floran and replied, "Hey, it''s not my fault cats are better than dogs." "NO! DOGS DO INDEED MAKE A SOUND WHEN THEY FALL OVER EVEN IF NO ONE IS THERE TO HEAR IT!" Kookakoo shouted in response. Brazilian Bug Boy looked away for a second, thinking to himself. "You know, I think Floran might be right. How did we even get on this conversation to begin with?" Octopus Man chuckled to himself a bit. "Well let me throw you into my flashback for a second for you to remember." 2 minutes ago "THE WORLD IS ENDING!" Civilians screamed as buildings crumbled to the ground and the sky turned red. Octopus Man and Kookakoo, being the courageous heroes they were, had already prepared themselves for this event and stood outside, ready to face whatever being was causing this destruction. "We are totally not prepared for this event and are not ready to face whatever being is causing this destruction." Kookakoo stated bluntly. Octopus Man nodded in agreement. Suddenly, one building began to fall towards them. They weren''t paying attention though. Instead, they continued staring off blankly. Just before the towering structure could collapse onto them, Floran, with her angel wings spread out, swooped in with a sword made of energy and slice the building in half, saving them from being crushed. Once she landed on the ground and her wings retracted, she turned to face Octopus Man and Kookakoo who were still staring off into the distance. Octopus Man then saw Floran out of the corner of his eye and turned to face her. "Oh hey Jessica." "YOU DON''T EVEN KNOW MY-" Floran was about to scream at Octopus Man like the straight man character she was, but realized that it was not worth it. She just facepalmed before speaking once again. "Do you guys even know what is causing the world to collapse?" "No clue." Octopus Man responded, shifting his gaze to the sky. "Could be Satan." Kookakoo stated. "Very true. He''s known for this kinda thing according to this obscure book I read once." Octopus Man replied. "Enough one-liners, this is serious." Floran said in an exasperated tone. Octopus Man and Kookakoo were now both wearing suits and ties. "Do we not look serious to you?" Octopus Man asked. This tale has been unlawfully obtained from Royal Road. If you discover it on Amazon, kindly report it. Brazilian Bug Boy then ran up to them and screamed, "GUYS! I LEFT MY OVEN ON! I THINK IT BURNED THE CUPCAKES I WAS BAKING AND THE BUTTERFLY EFFECT CAUSED THE WORLD TO PLUNGE INTO CHAOS!" Octopus Man and Kookakoo, who were inexplicably back to wearing their normal attire, turned to face Brazilian Bug Boy. "Ugh, be serious man." Octopus Man said, rolling his eyes. "Exactly. Why is everyone constantly making jokes." Kookakoo added. Floran gave a side-eye to them before saying, "I''ll beat them to a bloody pulp later. Continue what you were saying Brazilian Bug Boy." He nodded and continued. "Yes, as I was saying. I left my oven on, and a butterfly knocked on my door and said ''I''m gonna do an effect'' and then the world started crumbling." "... What did the oven have to do with that?" Floran asked with a deadpan expression on her face. "I BURNED MY CUPCAKES! I WANTED THEM SO BAD!" Brazilian Bug Boy replied with a shout. "Not as good as biscuits." Octopus Man and Kookakoo stated simultaneously. Brazilian Bug Boy ignored them and continued what he was saying. "I think we gotta find this butterfly and kill it with our bare hands. Like rip it apart limb from limb. Like just absolutely clobber it. I mean completely and utterly crush it, while giving it a slow and painful death." "I don''t know why you had to get so graphic, but okay, let''s find this thing." Floran replied. She turned her head to look at Octopus Man and Kookakoo before waving them on. "Come on you two." Octopus Man sighed and started whining. "Why must we always do work." Kookakoo, also whining, said, "Literally! We do not deserve this." The four of them spend many years finding this butterfly. After just one minute, they found the butterflies secret hideout. "Here it is I think." Brazilian Bug Boy stated, pointing to a cave. "How do you know it''s here?" Floran asked, looking perplexed. "Because before it did the effect, I asked it where it lived." Brazilian Bug Boy replied. "You could have said that earlier but okay." Floran said with a hint of both sarcasm and exhaustion in her voice. They walk into the cave. It was pitch black inside and the only thing they could see was the back of their eyelids. "Why are we all closing our eyes suddenly?" Floran asked. "Good question." Octopus Man said. The four of them opened their eyes, and the cave was actually well lit. "WHO DARES ENTER MY CAVE!" The butterfly shouted. The four of them looked around to see where the sound was coming from. Kookakoo hid behind Octopus Man and began crying. "What''s wrong Kookakoo? We''ve been through worse than this." Octopus Man stated, looking over at her. "Yeah but, I never told you this but my greatest fear ever is a butterfly." Kookakoo replied. "Hm? Why are you scared of Butterflies?" Octopus Man asked. "I''m not. I''m scared of a butterfly. If I see a singular butterfly I freak out. Seeing multiple is nothing though." Kookakoo explained. "Oh, that makes sense." Octopus Man responded with a smile. All of the sudden, the butterfly descended from the sky. "We''re in a cave. There is no sky." Floran stated. Thanks for pointing out my error, but I''m the narrator here. "Whatevs." Floran said, shrugging her shoulders. Brazilian Bug Boy stepped up to the butterfly and asked, "Are you the once causing all of this chaos?" "Why yes I am. I just saw the movie ''The Butterfly Effect'' and was like, damn, I can do that? And so I put my butterfly powers to work." the butterfly explained. "And what exactly did you do to put the effect in motion?" Floran asked. "You see. I said pineapple on pizza was good and the world naturally devolved within seconds." the butterfly answered. "And that''s how the argument started." Octopus Man concluded, finishing the flashback. "Oh yeah I forgot." Brazilian Bug Boy said to himself. "That also explains why the Earth was destroyed." Floran stated. The four of them were sitting in a room that was floating in the vacuum of space.